#why this post collect more likes in one day than the posts I actually put my heart in

[bisexualiteaa]

actually dying for a cooper howard x vaultie!reader smut where they have some slow burn longing steaminess, but coop thinks she’s too good for him UNTIL she comes in contact with a sex pollen-esque chem and he finally gives in to save her 🥵 please work your magic and elaborate however you want

A Flame in Your Heart

Cooper Howard x Fem Reader (SMUT!!)

CW: NSFW like absolutely filthy y’all, you’ve been warned. 💀 unprotected sex, irradiated cream pie, p in v, p0rn w/ plot, slow burn, flirting, cursing, perverted thoughts, dub-con (because of chem usage though consent is asked and given!) rough sex, dirty talk, choking, praise kink, degradation, squirting, mention of fingering, FEELINGS!! Slight deviation from TV series, possible grammar/spelling mistakes, cooper starts off mean but slowly warms up to reader

AN: I absolutely LOVED this request! I was up all night writing down all my ideas and spent all this morning perfecting it, and this has to be my longest one yet! I thank you for your patience anon and my lovely readers as I finally post this! Hope you enjoy and that I have done your ask justice! ❤️

Life outside of the vault was difficult to say the least. You felt hunger and dehydration in ways you’d never experienced before, going out of your way to do desperate things you would normally never do in order to get said food and water. The heat was unbearable, every stretch of land you walked across had a danger lurking around every corner, and worst of all, you’d never felt so alone. You weren’t sure what it was about you, maybe it was because you were new to the surface, maybe it was your nearly perfect skin, but everyone seemed to stare or glare at you when you would walk through. It wasn’t until you’d passed through Filly, meeting Ma June that you realized people didn’t take kindly to people like you. “Vaulties” she called them, an audible disdain in her tone, making you look down to remember you were in your blue and gold Vault-Tec suit. “I’ll be going then, have a nice day!” You said skiddishly, offering her a kind smile before turning and exiting the shop. You just wanted to make friends, why was that so hard up here? So when your eyes set on a man clad in classic Wild West cowboy clothes, watching smoke settle after a stand off, you weren’t sure why but you knew that was who you needed on your side in this world. Before you knew it, your feet were already moving and mouth speaking to him, grabbing his attention.

“I ain’t no charity case sweetheart, I don’t take on strays” The ghoul spoke, his southern drawl making him even more memorable than the marred texture of his skin. You looked to the dog that trailed not far behind him as he walked, changing its pace to keep up with the man. “The dog there with you tells me otherwise” you quipped. “Ain’t my dog” he responded harshly as he continued walking. “I can make it worth your while!” You yelled, making him stop in his tracks for a moment, a scary sight at first before you worked up the nerve to come closer once he turned back to you. “And how you suppose you’d do that?” He asked, and at first you didn’t know what to say, the words leaving your mouth before you could really think of a good enough reason. Did nobody like company anymore these days? “Well…I can be your scavenger! Pretty good at collecting stuff” you offered, shaking your bag and making things rattle around inside to prove it, making him give a huff of a chuckle. “‘f I wanted a pack mule I’d‘ve found a brahman” he shot you down. “Okay, then I can be good company to talk to!” You offered. “They make radios for when I want to listen to someone yack” he shut down once again. “I’m a good cook! Even with shitty supplies, I can make a stew that’d put a smile even on the meanest son of a gun’s face” you said, hopeful that he’d at least take you for something, but you had a feeling he’d probably turn you down again. “Iguana on a stick’s just fine” he said, though he had to admit the stew sounded good. Reminded him of home before all this wasteland bullshit. “Oh, umm…” you said awkwardly, your tone growing quiet and my how it put a sad look in your eyes. The evil part of him liked it, seeing your sweet innocent face all downturned but the part that was still human deep down, the part that hardly ever saw the light of day anymore, had half a mind to let you.

“Got a lotta nerve walkin’ up t’ me, girly. If you somehow been lucky enough that you ain’t met dangerous yet, you’re lookin’ at someone who could put you down before you’d even mutter your last words” he threatened, motioning to the double barreled shotgun in his hands. “I know, I saw it first hand. You hold yourself well, I envy that. I’m new to all of this and just really want someone who can help me hold my own the same way” you explained. “Look, I know I don’t look like much but please just give me a chance” you begged, looking up at him with a fighting spirit in your eyes that he had to admit, he was pretty impressed in seeing in a vaultie. “You help me, I help you, however that ends up being” you offered, standing strong on this and damn if he didn’t see a little bit of himself in you at that. He gave a sigh, tilting his head down before shaking it, not believing himself for the words he was about to say. “Alright, but the minute you start draggin’ you’re out, got me?” He said, and he hated the way his cold heart seemed to pump a little faster upon seeing your eyes light up with joy and a smile stretch to your face. “Oh thank you, thank you, thank you!” You said, opening your arms up to hug him but being met with the barrel of his gun poking your stomach to keep space between you. “I don’t do hugs” he spoke gruffly, making you back up enough to where he’d drop the gun back to his side. “R-Right…sorry” you apologized, embarrassment washing over you but still glad to finally have someone in your company. “C’mon, I ain’t got all day now” he said, motioning you to start walking, so you joined him.

Your travels with him certainly weren’t at all what you were expecting them to be. From being used as bait, to being tied up with rope most of the time you’d traveled together, or being sent in as his scavenger, you weren’t prepared for a lot of the reality you faced with being up on the surface. Most nights made you question why you’d ever left the comfort of the vault, why you’d abandoned a trusty food supply, regulated temperatures, a safe place to sleep that wasn’t riddled with radroaches or had the likely hood of waking up to a raider with a knife at your throat for no reason. Then you would remember the experiment in your vault, why you left that awful place for arguably a worse reality on the surface but at least you had freedom. Out here you were free to say what you want, do what you want, consume what you want so long as you could defend yourself incase that supply wasn’t unclaimed. You’d gotten pretty handy with a gun in the most recent weeks. Cooper, you learned one night was his name, using empty glass bottles as targets to help teach you accuracy and how to hit things from a longer range. In exchange, you came a little more useful than he had first thought. You had some useful stuff on you for trade like chems, ammo and food, were a good extra bag to hold stuff in, and you were a better cook than you’d talked about. Sure you had a tendency to talk too much, and you weren’t great with a gun, but you were getting there.

“Might I suggest takin’ them clothes instead of wearin’ that suit?” He said, making you look at him weird for suggesting you strip a dead raider of their clothes. “Why would I do that…?” You asked, genuinely confused and not sure what he was implying either, he was a hard man to predict. “Because, people see that shit and get real mad. People up here don’t like vaulties or the ones that run ‘em” he said and it made sense, it helped you understand why you kept getting evil glares each time someone would look at you or talk to you. You figured he knew best, so you took the shirt and pants from one of the female raiders, tucking them into your bag to change into at a better time. He gave a chuckle watching you do so, apologizing to the dead body profusely as you took their clothes and whatever valuables they had on them for the betterment of your own survival. You were still so naive, part of him was hoping he could slowly start to break and corrupt your way of thinking, but that was a thought for another time.

Before you knew it, night finally began to fall. The sun setting across the horizon gave the air less of a hot, harsh bite as the temperature began to cool rapidly across the sands of the Mojave. All you managed to grab was a pair of beat up, old jeans and a tank top, so as soon as the sun set, the chill set in. As you both set up camp for the night just outside of an abandoned rest stop, you started a fire to cook some of that stew you talked about being good at. He had to admit, it was pretty damn good, likely the best thing he’s had since before the bombs went off. Though even the kindling fire couldn’t manage to chase the chill away, watching you run your hands up and down your arms to try and warm up some by it. He felt a slight pang in his heart, watching you shiver like that, how your eyes lit up by the blaze of the fire and your hair seemed to be tousled just right. You were pretty, too pretty to be trekking this wasteland, and certainly too pretty to be trekking it with him of all people as your company. Even he had a heart still, as cold as it was, so out of kindness he shrugged his duster from his shoulders, draping it around you. You looked at the fabric pooled around you, pulling it over you better before looking to him as he sat down across from you again. “Ain’t no use if the cold gets ya” he said, making you smile appreciatively at him as you realized what he did. “Thank you” you replied, a slight blush fanning to your cheeks as the chattering of your teeth finally died down and you grew warmer. It smelled like him, sure it had splatters of old dried blood and was rather worn, but it had that gunpowder and smoke smell to it that you associated with him. “Don’t say I never did nothin’ for ya” he replied, trying to sound cold but it didn’t come off that way, making you chuckle. “What do I owe you?” You asked, making him fall silent for a moment as he pondered the answer to your question. He looked you over for a second before tipping his hat down to cover his face a bit, the signal that he was about to try and get some sleep. “Just keep watch for a bit, I’ll be up in a few hours” he responded, and while it wasn’t what you were expecting, you’d take it.

He was startled awake a couple hours later when he heard a commotion, you yelling at someone telling them to back off that this place had been claimed. The raider you were up against didn’t seem to like that very much, claiming that wasn’t how it worked up here. The altercation took a turn for the worst when the man reached for his gun but you were quick to fire and kill him before he could let out a shot. A shaky feeling set in your hands and a horrified expression across your face at the realization that you just killed someone. Cooper, who was certainly wide awake now, was rather impressed by your quick timing and precision, coming up behind you to lay a gloved hand to your shoulder. “Well would ya look at that, looks like them lessons been payin’ off after all. How’s it feel?” He asked, looking down at you as you stared at the gun in your hands. “He was yelling at me but…he was aiming at you. I don’t really know what came over me, I didn’t like that he was going to shoot you so I just…I killed him” you said, recounting the encounter to him as if he hadn’t seen it himself. He didn’t really know what to think in that moment as you explained how your mind worked, he was proud for sure at your show of improvement with a gun, yet also touched at the same time. No one ever really looked out for him since he started his bounty hunting, he was a well hated man by many but you defended him without really any reason to. You’d just learned his name not but two weeks ago, and before that he was dragging you around with rope yet you still defended him, had you two really gotten closer in the time that’s passed since? He wasn’t sure, but it was something he could mull over while you were sleeping. “Get some rest vaultie, sun’ll be up soon” he said, knowing you likely wouldn’t get much sleep with the adrenaline still coursing through you, but it was at least worth a try, you two had a long day ahead of you.

When you woke up that next morning, things felt a little different between you two. You weren’t some annoying little dog following him anymore, you were an equal. He no longer looked at you and treated you like you were lower than him as you both set out across the wastelands, he had respect for you. Hell, he even started talking with you now when you were out traveling which was almost unbelievable. You learned through those conversations that he used to be an actor in Wild West themed films, explaining his outfit, and that he was married before the bombs dropped. You of course told him bits and pieces about yourself in exchange, after all it only felt fair but it was also nice to just finally talk to someone after all this time.

When night time fell again you two sat enjoying a meal by the fire together, only rather than across from each other, he sat next to you, making a blush come to your face as you’d smiled sweetly at him. “Glad to know I don’t have germs anymore” you said jokingly, making him chuckle. “Give an old man some credit. It ain’t exactly all peaches and marmalade out here darlin’, even cute can be deadly” he said, the nickname and him calling you cute sending a deeper blush to your cheeks despite knowing it’s just how he spoke. Whether it was the lack of contact with other people for so long, or just his charm you couldn’t quite tell, but it always seemed to have an effect on you. “Just teasin’ you, I get it. I’d tie me up and use me for bait too if I’d been doing this as long as you have. It’s a shit hole out here” you said, making him look at you as you dropped the first curse word he’s ever heard from you. “Well I’ll be damned, either I’m a bad influence or you’re finally growin’ outta that naive shell there, vaultie” Cooper replied, making you laugh as you saw a smirk stretch to his thin, marred lips, the first one you’d seen in a while that wasn’t brought on by drugs, chems or that first sip of a good bottle of alcohol. “Probably both” you quipped, making him chuckle. “Yeah, probably. Been told I ain’t easy to stomach” he said, making you hum. “You’re alright in my book, Coop” you replied with a sweet, genuine smile that matched your tone and was that butterflies you felt in your stomach? Did you just call him Coop? No ones called him that in ages, why did it make his heart start to flutter a bit? “You ain’t so bad yourself, vaultie” he responded, still affording you that small smile before turning back to his food. “Keep making food this good and I just might have to keep you around” he joked, making you giggle and break the slightly tense silence. “It’s not much but I certainly try. I’ll definitely make sure to stay good at it, I like traveling with you” you said, unintentionally coming off flirtatious and fuck there it goes again, that feeling in his chest and his stomach like he needed to hit his inhaler but he felt great. What were you doing to him?

“Hey, if it isn’t too much can I ask you a sort of…personal question?” You asked, holding the beat up bowl in your hands as you looked over at him. This was normally the part where he would say no, absolutely not, he wasn’t here to be questioned on his personal matters. Yet, with you, it was different. Ever since last night he hasn’t been so on edge with you, it was like he’d warmed up to you. “Depends on what you’re askin’ there, sweetheart” he said, the nickname once again making you blush. “Do you…miss them? Your wife and daughter?” You asked, not sure if it was a good subject or good question to ask but after finding out, you were genuinely curious. He looked down at his bowl again, thinking of the proper response to your question. The old him would have been defensive, told you it was none of your business, but now? He wasn’t sure. “Ain’t a day that goes by that I don’t think about ‘em. About the way I ran out on ‘em when them bombs dropped” he answered, making you give him a sad look as genuine guilt filled his tone. This was the most honest and open he’s been with you this whole time. “I feel guilty. Not sure if I feel guilty for runnin’ out and leavin’ ‘em behind or guilty for the way I ran out, been tryin’ t’ figure that out for quite a while now and I still ain’t sure” he added, and you sympathized with that. Everyone has regrets, things they’ve done in the past that they aren’t proud of, people up here were no different in that aspect. “Well, in the short time I’ve gotten to know you, I’ve come to understand that everything you do has a valid reason behind it. So even if you feel it was a shitty thing to do, you obviously had a reason for doing so. No one can blame you for trusting your gut, and I don’t think you should blame yourself for doing so” you responded, your hand falling to his as a comforting gesture, your words ringing in his head almost as if you’d opened something in his mind, something he’d never really gave himself to think about before. He looked down at your hand that rested on his, noticing the way you didn’t flinch away from him like others did, the way you were brave enough to walk up to him, talk to him, *trust* him when he made it very clear that you shouldn’t. It was smaller than his, softer for sure, but warm all the same, then he looked up to see that caring look in your eyes and smile on your face that told him that you cared. “Guess you’re right, still wonder sometimes if it was the right choice to make” he replied. “I understand. Everyone has regrets, we all look at the past and hold at least something that we’ve done before in regret, it’s what makes us human” you said, making him give a huff as a chuckle. “You got anybody?” He asked, making you look down as you moved your feet along the dirt. “An ex-husband, but not anyone I really care about, no. My parents passed a few years before the bombings and he and I split up when I caught him cheating on me with some other woman in the vault..” you explained, not sure why it hurt you to tell the tale still, but you felt it was only fair considering what you’d asked of him to share. “Sorry t’ hear that” Cooper said, making you chuckle weakly, a somber look coming to your face that made his heart wrench. “I haven’t exactly been in love since, and considering he and I split up just a little over ten years ago, really says something I guess, huh?” You asked, trying to laugh to bring up the mood, knowing you sounded pathetic. “He was the fool, not you darlin’. He was the one skippin’ out on one hell of a woman” Cooper said, making you look to him and blush a bit as you gave a chuckle at his response.

“Thanks” you replied appreciatively and with a smile before casting your gaze down to see your hands were still connected and it left you blushing harder with embarrassment, you’d been holding his hand this entire time without realizing it. “Oh my gosh, I’m so sorry! I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable if I have I-“ “relax vaultie” he cut you off, pushing your hand back down onto his to assure you that he was far from uncomfortable. “It’s…rather nice actually” he admitted, making you feel relieved but your heart fluttered in your chest from it. A thick tension soon began to set in between you both after that night, something of an unspoken, kindling romance beginning to develop. “Then there it can stay” you said, making him smile softly at you, tipping his hat at you as a silent thank you.

Months passed on like this, where you’d spend the days scavenging, picking the land for its resources you could find and hunting bounties by day, then spending your nights by a fire growing closer and closer with every passing day. Through your shared meals, jokes, deep conversations, and plenty of near death experiences, you started to notice your fondness of the ghoul you traveled with. The way you’d hang onto his words with that southern accent that seemed to pull at your heart strings, or the way you’d go out of your way to stand between him and a stray bullet. You’d helped him on more than one occasion in getting out of a sticky spot, or getting him the stuff he needed to keep from turning feral. In return, he started to notice he was feeling the same towards you. There was this sudden need to keep you safe, to do nicer things for you, to speak better towards you, even flirt with you at times. Some nights there’d be so much tension in the air, it’s a miracle you haven’t jumped each other yet. Though in his eyes, as much as his heart yearned for you, he knew you were too good for him. You’d been hurt before, and he had a reputation for hurting people, feeling undeserving of even just the sweet smiles and company you afford him even now. You didn’t need someone like him, you needed a good man, someone who didn’t kill for a living, someone who could treat you right, someone who didn’t look the way he did. You were soft and warm, he was rough and cold, though he supposed that’s where the term “opposites attract” came from. So even when he was a whole bottle deep, he was sure to hold his tongue to a certain point.

Some of those nights around the fire were spent sober, others not so much, and this night happened to be one of those nights spent under the influence. You two had stumbled across a mini-mart, doing your best to out run the radstorm that had been trailing you guys for hours, coming in just to find whatever supplies you could to make it through the next week and possibly hunker down for the night. So imagine your surprise when you seemed to have found the largest chem stache you’d both ever laid eyes on. “Coop! Come here, you gotta see this” you said, making him run towards you to make sure you weren’t hurt or in trouble. His nerves were eased once he saw you, fully intact. “Tell me I’m not seeing shit” you said, pointing to all of the supplies sitting in a box on the table, joined by other supplies around it. You both looked at each other in complete and utter disbelief, this would keep you stocked for months, maybe even a whole year if you conserved it well. “Well ain’t that just the prettiest fuckin’ sight” he said. There was no way a horde of chems this large and this valuable was just completely unprotected you reasoned, so you routed around the place, scoping out for any raiders, straggling traders or ferals who happened to still be around. It was as if heaven was shining down on you both as you found no one around, seemed like no one had been here for days. So you did the most logical thing anyone would do in this situation. Stuff each of your bags to the brim of drugs of all varieties! Seeing as you had food, chems and even some clean water and alcohol lying around, Cooper locked and barricaded the door shut, proposing it could be a good spot to sleep for the night. With a radstorm approaching, it was best to have a roof over your heads to keep out the rain and potential radiation sickness that came with it. “This is the closest fuckin’ thing to a slice of heaven I’ve seen in ages” he said, aside from you is what played in his mind but he couldn’t speak that out loud, no matter how much he wanted to. “You said it!” you replied, and it’s even better with you here you thought, but thought it best to keep it to yourself. He plopped down on the couch, kicking his feet up to rest on the small table that seemed to be in shambles, enjoying a tape that was playing on the TV that he was surprised to still see functioning. “Holy shit, this thing still works?” You asked, amazed to see working technology out in the wastelands, sitting next to him as you watched it with him. He gave a smirk at your reaction, thinking it was cute the way your eyes would light up when you got all excited over something. Deep down it made him want to give you everything you laid eyes on like that just to see it pointed towards him. “Guess so” he replied, enjoying your excitement only to see you turn and look his way, which was his signal to stop staring holes into you before he gets caught. “I dunno about you baby doll, but I ain’t about to spend tonight sober with this stache sittin’ here ‘n front of us” he said, making you laugh as he routed through all the different drugs and chems til he found what he was looking for.

In the process of searching through it all, a small metal box fell to the floor at your feet. It looked like a box of mentats only the design was different, instead of the characteristic green and white box was a red one covered with hearts labeled DN-Chem. You supposed the worst that could happen was turn into the man sitting next to you, which you figured wasn’t the worst fate to succumb to all things considered, so you went against all better judgement and said fuck it, popping two of the mentat like chems and chasing it with the vodka he’d found to wait for it to take effect. “The hell is DN?” He asked, looking at the box, wondering what it was you took. “Don’t know, guess we’ll find out here soon because I took two” you said, taking another sip from the bottle of vodka he passed your way, and he gave a chuckle as you handed it back to him. “You come a mighty long way, little lady” he commented before setting the metal pill box down. He took the bottle from you, taking a swig, then placing one of the small viles into his inhaler before taking a hit of it then lying back, breathing a sigh of relief as it and the alcohol entered his system like the perfect remedy to any ailment. As about a half an hour rolled by, you waited for the high to set in but it never came, instead you were just getting hot, like really hot. There weren’t any windows open, and it was night time so you shouldn’t be this uncomfortably hot for how it was but you felt like you were on fire. “Shit, it’s hot as hell in here…” you complained, shaking off your jacket that you’d picked off of some raider a few weeks back, making him look to you curiously. “Lightweight” he quipped, making you chuckle. “Accept I don’t feel anything, I just feel hot” you said, making him hum with intrigue before turning back to the TV. “Give it some time, you’re new to all this. ‘m sure your body is wonderin’ what the hell you just put in it” he said, and he had a good point, maybe it was just a side effect of not doing them so often compared to his every day use.

As time went on, you began to notice the way your eyes couldn’t help but be glued to him, more specifically glued to the way his legs were now spread as he sat back. You wondered to yourself what he looked like beneath all that cowboy get up, what his reaction would be like to see you getting on your knees for him and slotting yourself between his spread legs. You shook your head to try and rid yourself of such inappropriate thoughts, but what you couldn’t stop no matter how hard you tried was the feeling of arousal beginning to pool in your panties. Sure he flirted with you every now and again, but you doubt he felt towards you the same way you did for him. To him you were sure you were likely more akin to a pet than a friend, useful and nice to have around, but not anything further. At least so you thought. You’d rather hoped you were wrong in assuming so, that maybe he saw you the same way you saw him. You bit your lip as you tried bouncing your leg to relieve the ache between your thighs, a light pink dusting your face and neck even up to the tips of your ears, but nothing worked. Even as you closed your eyes, all you could picture was you laid out on the couch beneath him, or bent over it with him behind you, or you riding him on it. “Been awful quiet. You doin’ alright over there, sweetheart?” Cooper asked you, and the audible whimper you let out from the nickname left you completely embarrassed. You clasped a hand over your mouth, god you were horrified but he gave a grin and a chuckle in response. “I’m so sorry, I don’t know what’s gotten into me all the sudden. I feel so…weird?” you said, unsure if that was really the proper word to explain it but it was the only way you could really word it off the top of your head with how much your brain felt as if it was turning to mush. “Ya took some chems, it’s gonna feel a bit fuzzy” he said, trying to assure you that feeling a little funny was normal, but this? This didn’t feel normal, not even for a chem high. You tried your best to swallow harshly, doing everything you could to try and relieve the dry ache you felt in your throat at the moment upon looking at him. You grabbed the bottle of vodka, taking a few sips but even that couldn’t grant you bliss from it. The throbbing in your core was driving you absolutely insane. You swore up and down that it was like you could feel your heartbeat in your chest, stomach, and in your cunt all at the same time. “No, this is different…I don’t think what I took was a normal chem, Coop…” you said, trying not to panic at the effects that were setting in but god you felt like you were absolutely feral. He turned to look at you, watching as you clamped your thighs together and the red that fell over your face. “I feel like an animal in heat” you said bluntly, making him go into a near coughing fit as you took him off guard. However that piqued his interest enough to pick up the little metal box again to see what it was you took. “I ain’t ever heard of a chem that does that, was that DN shit the only stuff you took?” He asked, growing slightly concerned for you and whether he had a possible horde of laced chems, or just an extremely horny woman on his hands. Speaking of hands, you were lost in thought staring at them, at the way they gripped the couch like you wanted him to grip your thighs, at the way they looked in those leather gloves he always wore. You wondered how it would feel wrapped around your throat, or how it would feel if his fingers were buried deep inside of you. Shit. This was getting out of control.

“Hey, ya with me still?” He asked, snapping to try and get your attention back on the matter at hand, making you shake your head yes as you broke from your perverted thoughts. “Is that DN shit the only thing you took?” He asked again, making you shake your head yes once more, because you knew damn well your voice was going to betray you the moment you tried to speak. That had to be it, it was the only thing that was different out of it all and the only thing he’d never heard of before. He knew it wasn’t the vodka either because he was drinking it with you, so if it was affecting you, it would have affected him and it hadn’t.

It took him a minute to put two and two together before he finally realized the abbreviations stood for Date Night, reading the instructions and effects on the inside of the tin’s lid. “Shit..” he said as he read it, realizing this was a hand made thing thrown into the bunch by whoever was running this place. “Did you read the lid before you popped them pills?” He asked, making you go wide eyed. As if this couldn’t get any fucking worse, this shit show could have been avoided had you just read the inside of the lid. “There was instructions?? Oh my god…what the fuck did I take?” You asked, concerned for yourself and the tone he had while reading it. “Somethin’ that the creator of it called Date Night. Looks like it’s a…well looks like it’s a handmade sex chem” he said, making you cover your face with your hands out of sheer embarrassment, you’d never wanted to die out in a radstorm more than you did right now. “Please tell me you’re fucking joking, cooper…” you whined, watching him read it more. “How much of it did you take?” He asked, almost scared to know and you were scared to know why. “Two?” You replied, making him whistle at that as he read it. “Fuckin’ hell sugar..” he said through a chuckle, and that nickname made a shiver run through you, sending electric bolts straight to your throbbing cunt. You did your best to bite back the whimper. “You’re only s’possed take one, and with you bein’ new t’ all this, I wouldn’t have taken more than half” he said, making you just wish you could just dig a hole and die in it already. “Fuck me…wait, shit! N-Not literally fuck me I- well I mean I’d like if you did but…FUCK! Forgive me Cooper, I’m so sorry, I can hardly think straight” you said, making him chuckle. “Well sweetheart, I think you and I both know there’s only one good fix for this situation” he said, making you whimper pathetically at the thought, your thighs squeezing together even more as you tried to fight to stay sane. Your eyes cast downwards to his lap once more, seeing the tent forming in his pants, clearly you weren’t the only one all worked up here. “I don’t want to make you feel like you have to, Coop. I can run off and take care of myself if it makes you uncomfort-“ you rambled but before you could finish, his hand cupped the side of your face, pulling you in for a long awaited kiss. You moaned into it without meaning to, feeling the way your body immediately relaxed upon wrapping your arms around him with no hesitation as the sweet innocent kiss turned passionate and dirty rather quickly.

“I won’t lie t’ you, doin’ this with you has passed my mind more times than I’d care to admit, but I don’t wanna cross that line unless you really want this” he said, looking into your eyes and making sure that this was truly what you wanted, that you felt the same way he did. “Coop, I know I’m under the influence of whatever the fuck this drug is, but trust me when I say, I’d be just as good with it sober. Been thinking about it for probably just as long as you have, if I’m honest with you. I want this, I want you and right now I want you so fucking bad that I might lose my mind if you don’t fuck me” you answered bluntly, taking him by surprise at just the sheer amount of absolute filth that left your otherwise innocent mouth, making him chuckle at your use of curse words and how desperate you were for him. “That so sugar?” He asked with a grin, enjoying teasing you at your neediest moments, including now. “God yes, Cooper please..” you begged, nearly moaning in reply and he’d spent time mulling over it before, denying himself the chance but just as the chem stache was a pot of gold, he took this as one of the best opportunities being placed in his lap by whatever higher power existed out there, making him waste no time in kissing you once more. “Good, because I don’t think I’d be able to hold myself back once we’ve started” he said, and the idea made you moan. “Don’t want you to hold back, want all of you” you said, and your wish was his command.

By the time your brain could finally catch up with you again, your clothes were strewn out all around you, your tank top hanging over the back of the couch, your jeans thrown haphazardly on the arm rest behind you, his pants on the floor, his hat on the table and shirt and duster having fallen somewhere behind the couch. By now, you’d already cum on his fingers twice, and on his cock once, this was your fourth round and this shit still had you on fire. “Yes!! Oh fuck, Cooper!” you moaned as your legs wrapped around his hips, keeping him as close to you as you could get, your fingers digging crescent shapes and puffy red lines into his back that unfortunately he knew wouldn’t stay long thanks to his ability to heal stupidly fast. “Doin’ so good for me, baby doll. Look so pretty like this for me, all splayed out like a needy little whore” he praised and degraded through his groans, making you moan and roll your eyes into the back of your head at the praise mixed with degradation as his cock was drilling deep inside you like tonight was all you guys had. “Yeah, you like that, huh sweet thing? Like it when I tell you how good it feels and call you names?” He asked, making you nod your head yes because there wasn’t a single thought in that brain of yours other than his name, which you spoke like a mantra. “Never knew such a sweet lil’ thing like you would be such a dirty little minx. Fuck…enough to make a man like me go feral, ya know that?” he said, making you giggle as you moved his free hand up to your throat, urging him to choke you, and he groaned at the sight. Your kiss swollen lips all puffy and shining with spit, your cheeks dusted a constant pink that grew darker anytime his cock brushed that spot deep inside that made you cling to him, your eyes half lidded, looking up at him like he was your savior. It made him absolutely rock hard knowing you’d pick him over anyone else in this god forsaken wasteland. “My, you are just a little freak, ain’t you? Oh we are gonna have fun together, you and me honey” he promised, squeezing your throat tight enough to restrict your airflow but not enough to hurt or cause any damage. Just enough to get that puddle of a brain of yours all fuzzy as you got closer to your fourth orgasm of the night. “Cooper…’m so close, so close please!!” You begged, feeling the heavy drag of his cock as he pounded into you, leaving you damn near screaming as it nudged your cervix and that spongy little bundle of nerves deep inside. “Go on honey, I gotchya. Let go for me, wanna see those pretty faces and hear those pretty noises you make” he said, angling his hips just right to hit that spot over and over again. “Oh fuck, oh fuck I’m gonna cum again, I-“ you warned before your moans rose in pitch as your walls clamped around him, gushing on his cock as your orgasm hit you like a freight train. Your body arched off the couch, stars filling your vision for a moment as you felt your release gush out and coat your inner thighs, screaming his name like it was your only chance at salvation. “Well ain’t I just the damn luckiest man in the wastelands right now, got me a pretty little vaultie and she’s a gusher” he said, making you whimper at his teasing but judging by the way he emptied himself inside you for the second time, you took it as a sign that he liked that about you. “Holy shit, I-I didn’t know I could do that” you said, thoroughly shocked with what your brain and body were doing as they almost seemed to almost be working against each other. “Do it again for me” he said, grabbing you and moving you both to where you were straddling him this time. His hands rested on your hips, helping guide you as you speared yourself on his dick with ease from how absolutely soaked you were, making you both throw your head back and moan. “Now that’s a damn good sight” he said, making you lean in to kiss him once more as his hands helped you start and keep a steady rhythm with your hips. It was definitely going to be a long night, but one you two have been needing for months, maybe even longer.

It’s a good thing ghouls have remarkable recovery time, because in order to finally get you sated and back to normal, you both had to spend all night going at it. Granted, it was aided by the mix of pent up sexual tension and pent up sexual frustration, but it was dawn before you both had gotten to a point where you could even *try* and fall sleep. First few times was on the couch between missionary, doggy and you riding him, next was you bent over it, with your pretty legs spread and ass in the air for him. Then, you used the arm rest of the couch as a pillow beneath your hips as he stood up while you laid out on the couch. He liked that one a lot for the way your tits would bounce with each and every forceful thrust into you, jolting your body. After that, it was done standing up with your back pressed against a wall, your legs and arms wrapped around him to keep him deep inside of you and fill you til he had nothing left to give you. From that point on, the rest of the night was all a hormone-hazed blur, but you knew well that he took care of you. You woke up unbelievably sore, your joints aching in places that you had no idea could even ache, a swollen, angry throb between your legs for the harsh, almost punishing treatment to your pussy followed by bruises, bite marks, scratch marks, hand prints etc. littered your skin as you woke up curled into Cooper’s side. You gave a gravelly groan as the sun shone in your eyes through the windows, making him chuckle at the way you were such a ray of sunshine except in the morning. Coming to learn that you absolutely *hated* mornings. Though you suppose you started to enjoy them more since traveling with him. “Mornin’ sunshine” he said coyly, making you groan disapprovingly at the way the sun was in your eyes, making you hold your hand up to cast a shadow on your face and grant you some relief. “Morning” you answered, your voice hoarse and half gone from sleep and all your activities that transpired the previous night. “Ain’t that a pretty sight” he said, turning and seeing you curled up to him, naked, your hair all messy from sleep and the hickeys and bite marks littering your skin, making you chuckle. “Last night was definitely something, can’t believe you’ve been holding all *that* out on me” you joked, making him give a dry laugh. “Could say the same thing about you, sugar. Had no idea that mind a yours could be so filthy. You’re a wild thing to party with, lil’ lady” he teased, sliding his arm around you to keep you close, making you hum as you lay soft, appreciative kisses to his collarbone and chest. “You’re fun too, and thank you for taking care of me last night. I’m sorry that it ended up happening the way that it did, I wanted to work up the courage and tell you some other way, I really did, but I guess life had other plans” you said making him chuckle as he saw you blush when he kissed your head. “Drunk words are sober thoughts they say, so I’d say I made out pretty good. But don’t sweat it, not sure how I deserved someone as good as you, but it’s good to know I ain’t as hard to stomach as most people say” he said, pulling you in for a soft, heartfelt kiss. “I think you are just perfect, Cooper” you said, your hand resting on his scarred chest as you looked at him with that gaze he swore he’d do anything to see pointed his way.

“You really wanna be my girl?” He asked softly, sounding shocked and with some self doubt still lacing his tone, but he had to be sure this was what you wanted outside of the drug’s effects. He cared for you deeply, in a way that he hasn’t felt in a very long time, but maybe you were just the right person for him to finally open his heart up to. His question made you giggle as your heart fluttered in your chest with excitement. “I absolutely do, I meant it when I said it last night, I mean it just as much now. I think we’ve danced around it for long enough, don’t you?” you replied, making him smile the most genuinely happy smile you’ve seen him wear since you’d met. “Just checkin’” he said, before laying a sweet kiss to your lips, wishing every morning could be like this one. Maybe it could, now that you were here with him.

[starags]

[slvt4felix]

I Could Never Hate You

Pairing -> ninth member!reader x Lee Minho WC -> ~3,300 words Includes -> hurt/comfort, angst, enemies to lovers, hyunjin's a meanie, reader has anxiety, minho struggles with his feelings, cringy nickname use, yelling, swearing Summary -> The rest of the group members are over the silly rivalry between you and Minho. They decide to take matters into their own hands. However, their little game takes a turn for the worse when one of the members betrays your trust. Some may call it destiny…the way it leads you straight into the arms of the one you would never expect. Author's Note -> This is my first time posting on here, so hopefully this isn't too rough. Also, I swear I don’t hate Hyunjin. I love him to death. It was just necessary for the plot… anywaysss hope you enjoy!!

Masterlist ♡ Next Part

“I swear to God if you guys don’t open this door right now!” You yell as you pound on the hotel room down the hall from yours. There hasn’t been a reply, but you know that Hyunjin and Felix are in there. The two of them are always locked in their hotel rooms the night before your shows. They try to get as much sleep as possible for the next day.

‘They are definitely laughing their asses off right now,’ you think to yourself. It was just a stupid prank to them. Something to get you and Minho to finally get along again, but they just don’t get it. You had tried for so long to make it work, but Minho was just too stubborn. For heaven’s sake, you guys used to be the best of friends. One day he just started being cruel. Ignoring your texts, saying snarky things under his breath, scoffing every time you accidentally messed a move up. It escalated to the point where you no longer talk anymore. Truly, it is not your fault and they don’t seem to get it. He refuses to say anything about what happened, completely disregarding the fact that you were ever close enough to share your deepest secrets.

You turn around to leave, realizing the two boys were probably never going to open the door. You hear the lock click and spin back to see the annoyingly beautiful face of Felix. Although he wasn’t outright laughing at you, he was putting little effort in trying to hide his smile.

“Hey, what are you so upset for? I didn’t notice anything wrong on the bus earlier?” Felix asks. You just stare back dumbfounded.

“Why the fuck would you ever put me in a room with him?” you spit pushing past Felix into his room, “Don’t you dare look at me like that, you know how he treats me.”

Hyunjin just looks at you from his spot on a queen bed closest to the window. He looks shocked, as if he hadn’t expected you to actually put up a fight against the sleeping arrangements.

"How is that our fault?" Hyunjin questions. He seems like he may be genuinely asking, but you know him better than that. You have always been closer to him than the other members, especially after all the things that went down with Minho. Hyunjin was always the one to comfort you. The first to step up when your anxiety got to be too much. So, it was obvious that the members did have something to do with it, and it wasn't just an unfortunate fluke.

"I saw the way you guys all ran to claim your rooms while I was still collecting my suitcase. Don't act stupid. I know you know what's going on," you say back in hopes to get him to at least explain what their plan was. Maybe you could reason with them and get one of the boys to switch. Heck, you'd even be willing to sleep on the couch in Hyunjin and Felix's room, but it's starting to seem like they don't even want you in their room in the first place.

You hear Felix close the door behind you, but it's all blocked out as you watch Hyunjin roll his eyes at you. While this may seem like a typical Hyunjin action, it just didn't feel right. He tries to be more gentle with you than the other boys. After confiding many of your secrets and insecurities in him, he knows to control his face around you. Yet, it's beginning to look like he's forgotten all about that tonight.

"Yeah, I'm the stupid one..." he mumbles under his breath. With every sentence exchanged, the tension in the room grows thicker. You almost feel bad putting the other poor boy in the room through this. You can practically feel him stiffen with every word spoken.

"Hyunjin-" Felix starts but is cut off by a sharp look from the man himself. You know it's starting to go too far if Felix is getting upset, but Hyunjin doesn't seem to care.

"Why are you so angry right now?" you ask him, praying the question doesn't fire him up more. Maybe he's just having a really bad day, or maybe he just wants to be alone and can't deal with your problems.

"I'm not angry," he starts, "you're just making a big deal out of absolutely nothing." By the end of it he begins to raise his voice, another thing he knows you aren't a fan of. You take a step back, a little confused at his ignorance. He's been with you through all the fights, why doesn't he understand how big of a deal this is to you?

As you're still trying to make sense of his previous statement, his voice quiets down, and he looks back down at his phone as he whispers, "Just like you always do."

"What is that even supposed to mean?" you ask, scared for the response. He glances up sharply, making true eye contact for the first time tonight.

"You're always crying over stupid shit, and I really can't handle it anymore,” he states angrily, his eyes not leaving yours the entire time. He finally breaks eye contact, and the tension explodes, painting the whole room red.

As dramatic as it sounds, it's like a knife to your heart, or perhaps more accurately a stab in the back. You know exactly what he means by that. It's like he was aiming for your most sensitive spots. With your anxiety, you tend to panic over things that don't usually matter much in other people's minds. Every time you have an anxiety attack or are just freaking out about something, you usually try to hide it. You worry that your friends won't take you seriously or will make fun of you over something they consider 'not a big deal'. You've confided in Hyunjin over this topic before. He's helping you get over that and come to them when you need help. So why is he now turning on you? Was it all an act before?

You feel your eyes start to tear up, but you hold them back. He cannot see you cry.

"Fuck you," you say, attempting to put venom behind it, but all that comes out is your shaky voice.

"Y/n, wait," Felix says sympathetically as you go to leave the room. Normally, you would stop and let Felix comfort you, but suddenly everything is feeling just a little too heavy and you can't seem to look him in the eye any longer. You stride out of the room, keeping your shoulders straight without even glancing back. You just need to stay strong until you make it into the hallway. You slam the door behind you despite typically being the one to argue when the other members to it. Your eyes are blurring too fast at this point to even recognize the fact that you probably should've shut it a bit quieter. It is a hotel and noise complaints are a thing, but, honestly, that is the least of your worries at the moment. You just keep replaying back the fight in your head trying to figure out what you did wrong. It had to be something, right?

You start down the hallway, cursing when you realize your room is at the other end of the hall. You hope the other boys can't hear your sobs, especially the two you just departed from. As much as you want to be comforted, it feels like you're past the point of no return and just want to be alone. You try to stifle your cries a bit with your hand, but it doesn't do much. You're heads getting a little too light, you're breathing getting harder to control. Your hands are shaking, and it seems like the crying is just starting. Some may call you sensitive, but when the tears start you simply begin to spiral. There's very little that can calm you down at that point. Hyunjin usually has to take you somewhere and help you take deep breaths especially before your concerts. But he's the one who started this mess. So, what are you supposed to do now?

You finally make it to your hotel room, barely being able to read the numbers, and you start to dig around in your pockets. You start to panic as you struggle to find your key card, but eventually you grasp the small rectangular piece of plastic and open the door.

Once inside, you shut the door, a bit calmer this time, and fall back against it. The only thing on your mind being the fact that you are finally in your own room, alone. You put your hands over your face, trying to quiet some of your senses. In the haste to get out of the situation, you completely failed to remember the problem that had started it all.

Minho is sitting in one of the beds; he had plenty of time to choose considering you just dropped your suitcase off and stormed off upon realizing the two of you would be rooming together. He's all cozy in his sweat pants and t-shirt, obviously thankful for your abrupt disappearance. He looks up, shocked to see you re-entering the room. He plans to make a jab of some sort, but immediately pauses upon seeing your state. It seems like you haven't even noticed that he's in there yet. He's never really seen you like this before, or at least not since he started pushing you away. Putting that aside, he accepts defeat realizing that you need someone. You need him.

Your eyes are covered as you cry quietly into your hands, pushing your head back into the wood behind you. You flinch slightly upon feeling strong arms wrap around your shoulders, pulling you away from the hard door. However, you soon relax into the arms, enjoying the feeling of safety flood your system. The man is warm and gentle as he presses you against him, pushing your head into the crook of his neck.

"Follow my breathing," he whispers in your ear, sending goosebumps from your head to your toes. You try to listen to him, but all of your senses are so overwhelmed that you can't seem to focus on anything. Feeling like a fool, you begin to cry harder, immediately sending you back to the fight with Hyunjin.

"Honey," he starts, "you just have to take a deep breath. I don't want you to pass out on me." Hearing the quiet voice in your ear helps bring your mind back to the present. Trying to focus on the instructions, you begin to notice the chest rising and falling slowly against yours. You can even feel the man's calm heart beat against your racing one.

Following the normally simple order, you try to take a deeper inhale resulting in a few hiccups and more tears. One of the arms around your shoulder falls and his hand begins to rub your back gently. As you focus on the sensation, your breathing starts to even out, just as Minho had hoped.

Once you are in a slightly better state, he moves you over to the bed. Setting you down on the edge, he kneels in front of you and softly pulls your hands away from your face. You instinctively bow your head, squeezing your eyes shut and trying to keep from facing the man in front of you.

Minho reaches his hand out, bringing your face back up towards his. You slowly open your eyes at the gentle touch. He's looking right back at you, a soft expression covering his face. He hasn't looked at you like that in years. He practically lights up when your eyes meet his.

A smile grows on his face, as he quietly says, "There you go, kitten." Your face flushes at the nickname, and you hear Minho giggle softly at your blushing cheeks. He used to call you that all the time. A fan had once greeted the two of you at a fan meet saying how you both had the same energy as cats. So from that day on, he had called you that nickname constantly, earning well-deserved teasing from the other boys. Yet, it had all stopped out of nowhere.

'He doesn't care about you anymore,' you remind yourself. You pull away from him roughly and stand up from the bed. You take a few steps away from him, the comfort you had felt being ripped away in seconds. This was too confusing. He can't ignore you for years and suddenly act normal. That isn't how this works.

"Why are you being so nice to me?" you ask him, just wanting some sort of explanation. He slowly stands up, his soft look from before transforming into a look of pure regret.

"What are you talking about? You're upset and I care about you," he calmly explains, obviously ignoring the elephant in the room. But you can see it in his eyes; the nerves, the regret, and the sadness painting itself across his irises.

"You hate me,” you say, leaving no room for discussion. You were sick of being left in the dark and being turned on. You just want to know, what happened?

"You don't really believe that do you?" he asks as his body language changes. He reaches a hand up, pulling a little too roughly against his hair as he looks down at the ground.

"I mean-" you start to say but are cut off by a small sniffle coming from across you.

The culprit looks up at you again, his eyes glistening with unshed tears. Minho never cries. It's just one of those things. So he wipes them away and says the last words you would ever imagine him speaking to you.

"I'm so sorry," he whispers genuinely, "I never meant to make you feel that way, but I guess that's what it's come to, hasn't it?"

You stand stiffly, staring at him. You had never seen the man look so defeated. You are even more confused about where the two of you stand than you have ever been.

"But I don't get it, you're just so mean. I don't know how you couldn't hate me."

"I could never hate you,” he states staring at you. His eyes are so deep that you can see exactly what he's feeling, and you realize, this is it. He's an open book. This may be the one time you get to see under the surface of Lee Minho since those days of friendship all those years ago.

"Then why did you push me away?" you ask, taking advantage of his state.

"I was just so scared. I thought you would hate me if you found out..." he trails off. You simply wait for him to finish his sentence, but he never does. He just looks back at you in hopes that you understand what he's trying to say. A silence builds, and Minho takes a deep breath before continuing.

"I love you and I was just too scared in case it would ruin the group," he says, finally letting the truth escape after years of secrets. The shock of the statement leaves you speechless, simply staring at your old best friend.

After a few seconds of building tension, you can’t help but start to giggle, leading to near hysterics with more tears springing to your eyes. You had thought you had cried all of them out, but it looks like you were wrong. There's no way that's the reason. If only he had been honest with his feelings, then you would've never been in this situation in the first place.

He looks surprised at your laughing, and his whole body seems to deflate.

'Hopefully he doesn't think I'm laughing at him', you think. There's no way they had messed up communication that bad to let it get to this point.

"You should have said that, Minho. I was so in love with you," you state gently, trying not to bewilder the poor man. He looks up, and there's pure excitement on his face. It's beautiful to see compared to his earlier expressions, and you're reminded of all those little reasons you love him. All those reasons that have been buried down due to his obliviousness.

"Really?" he says, taking a step closer to you. Your cheeks heat up upon realizing that you really did just reveal one of your darkest secrets.

He takes another step closer, his face now only inches from yours. You feel his arms wrap sweetly around your waist. You glance down at his lips; they're slightly chapped, but honestly, it's just all part of what makes Minho, Minho. Your eyes go back up to meet his, and you can see the tension and nerves drawn upon his face. You quickly close the distance, making the decision you should have made all those years ago.

Minho doesn't pull away, instead immediately melting into the kiss, bringing one hand up to delicately cup your cheek. This may be one of the softest moments you have ever witnessed from Minho, and man do you want more.

You don't kiss for long, it's short and sweet, but it means so much more. Within it is everything you had wished you could've said to each other since the beginning.

You both pull back, a laugh leaving both of your mouths as you take in how outrageous the situation is. He pulls you close again, his head falling on your shoulder.

"I promise, I will never ever treat you like that again. You mean so much to me," he whispers. You bring a hand up to pet the back of his hair, pulling back just enough to give him a kiss on the cheek.

The two of you eventually pull away as your eyelids begin to droop. You realize how late it has gotten, neither of you noticing with all the drama that has unfolded. You quickly change into your pajamas and get ready to go to sleep.

You end up in the same bed with your head lying on his chest, his fingers running through your hair. Despite how sleepy you both feel, you know there is so much more to talk about and neither of you will be able to fall asleep.

Minho breaks the silence, asking you the dreaded question, "So, what happened? Did someone hurt you?"

"Hyunjin and I fought. He said some very hurtful things." I reply sadly, the memories of the fight resurfacing.

"You two are so close, I'm sure he didn't mean it. You know how upset he gets when we’re on tour for so long. He gets aggravated having to be around us all the time, but it was still messed up for him to be so mean to you."

You laugh at his response, "Yeah, like you can talk."

"Hey!" he says dramatically. You both giggle, and despite the tough topic, the tension seems to melt away. It always used to be that way with Minho. It's as if the two of you were made for each other. Everything just felt so much better and easier around him. Suddenly, everything in life was a lot sweeter.

"But seriously, don't worry about it too much, kitten. Felix will take care of it, and Hyunjinnie will be running back to you by the morning."

Part 2 out now!

[kneelingshadowsalome]

Hello!! I just started reading your works recently and I think it's safe to say that I have fallen in love with them <3 the way you write both the cod guys and the reader feels so real and poetic that I just, eat it up everytime. I read your Barbarian! König post and it got me thinking about something.

König and Ghost are kinda opposites when it comes to their darlings. König likes darlings fiesty and snippy but Ghost likes his darlings as more agreeable or soft but not weak, ykwim??

And it got me thinking about Barbarian! Ghost. Whereas König got his darling bc he killed her husband and she was there when it happened, I see Ghost as going to take one girl originally but then the darling steps in front of said girl and says to take her instead, saving the girl and sacrificing herself. Idk but I think he would be very attracted to that, and unlike König who gently picks you up and puts you upon his horse while you kick and bite him, Ghost grabs you and lays you stomach first against his horse harshly, keeping a sturdy hand on your back as he rides away.

Sorry if this is weird or ooc!! But it was just a thought that came to me!

Oh Barbarian!Ghost would be sooo disinterested on the outside. He only saves her ass discreetly, but saves it more than enough times to spark her curiosity.

Why does he come to her rescue and then abandons her to her own devices?

CW: Minor violence (bruises), noncon groping, fear of SA, blood, cuddling & snuggling, Ghost being a complex PTSD weirdo who has a fascination towards bones.

It’s actually she who approaches him first, not the other way around. He allows her to seek protection by staying near him and thus get the others off her back: he might even throw her a piece of roasted lamb as if she were some stray cat, lurking about his campfire. But there’s not much more than that on offer for her: only a few sideways glances that tell her he regards her mostly as a nuisance and a liability, accompanied by a few scrap bones that luckily have some meat and fat still on them.

He shows her how to snap the bigger ones in half to get to the life saving marrow, and that’s when she realizes he regards her a bit dumb, some pretty royal girl who doesn’t know how to survive without a man.

And who’s to blame for all that? Clever men who have forced her to learn poetry and songs, pluck chords and recite philosophers from memory. No one ever even taught her how to ride a horse, the only things she can do is chat about the latest political turns and whether it’s old-fashioned to style your hair Southern style.

Now she’s supposed to strike a conversation with a barbarian who dresses in furs and wool, who collects the knuckles of his fallen enemies and looks at her like she’s the uncivilized one here. He probably plays dice with those bones, and she’s never seen him force a woman under him; she’s never seen him take a woman at all.

He’s probably half dead already, some ghoul raised to ravage this earth. But everytime she gets drooled over or spat upon, groped or squeezed or slapped on the soft flesh of her butt, she makes her way to him and only him. To become one with the shadows too, or to disappear, perhaps.

He gives her his biggest, thickest pelt to wrap around her shoulders, to cover those assets that make these wartorn men so crazy. Or then he doesn’t want to find her frozen to death at dawn... Dark, vast eyes look at her in the early morning fog, up from above from the highest heights, as if asking why she overslept again.

A rabbit is thrown at her feet, but she doesn’t know what to do with it: she knows he wants her to skin it, yes, but how? Even with the knife he provides her, she can only stare at the soft creature helplessly, lick her dry, creaky lips until he sighs and comes to wrench the blade away, taking the hare before it turns too stiff.

She’s almost certain he’s not even interested in women until one day, someone goes a bit too far and grabs a handful of her to squeeze. The spitting, jerking and screaming turn into a whole fistfight until she gets drawn to her knees by her hair. He’s about to rip her scalp off, of that she is sure from how much it burns.

Tears stream down her face from pure pain alone, but this time, the bone marrow man doesn’t only save her. He walks to the scene like a shadow, yanks her gropers head back, and slits his throat right then and there. The others take a few steps back, mist rises from their gaping mouths as he lets go of the bleeding slump, looking at the pulsing, open vein as if he intends to drink from it. But it seems he only wanted to confirm that the dead stay dead because his interest in this man fades as quickly as it was aroused.

She rises to her feet, only to get swept off them as he dives for her hips and raises her to a crude carry, mainly meant for wheat sacks and sheep.

With a wide palm resting on her butt, he hauls her back to his fire, further away from the open field, and she doesn’t dare to utter a word. He doesn’t squeeze her, he doesn’t grope or slap or force her, but he does throw the fur away from her shoulders to check her body for bruises. She stays silent for the whole inspection as he moves her joints and limbs to check if anything’s broken, carefully like she indeed was only a little lamb. Brushes the pads of his fingers across the darkening spots that tell a story of violence, and it makes her shiver.

They’re just bruises, but they’re also evidence that her body is not her own anymore. Still, this clinical inspection feels far more intimate and warm than the rough hands and demanding mouths from before: it’s not just the intention behind the touch, it’s his presence.

You’ve never felt so thoroughly seen.

A low rumble rises in agreement to you taking his probing so well, and you kind of wish he would hold you tonight.

Just… Hold you.

When he withdraws, content with finding you relatively intact after the attempted assault, you grab his wrist. His head snaps back instantly, but he doesn’t pry himself away from your insolent little fingers. If anything, he’s curious.

You don’t know his words, and he doesn’t know yours, so you decide it’s best not to speak at all.

Pulling his palm back, you bring it to your hip, then further up to your waist, trying to make it clear that it’s only closeness and body warmth you seek. You leave it there, and it stays there, out of its own free will. A thumb brushes over your ribs, explorative. His eyes travel, they move down the line of your neck and try to decide what you might want from him, but then you see the fathomless depths he’s been hiding. His eyes come alive, and there’s such darkness there, an unquenchable well of want that shoots fear straight down your stomach.

You were wrong about him, so wrong…

He’s not disinterested, he’s just been holding back a tide as if it’s no big deal to fight back the very gods on his own.

His palm feels like fire, but he doesn’t move, only battles with his demons for a while. You lie there before him, feeling utterly idiotic for thinking he’s different from the rest of the men.

But then… The fur gets drawn over your half naked body. Slowly, deliberately. He’s not reverent: he only knows the consequences of his actions, and this is a path he does not wish to take.

It doesn’t prevent him from laying himself down to sleep next to you, however.

It doesn’t prevent you from slowly reaching an arm around him, the rigid form that slowly, so slowly turns lax. You risk to curl against him: not safe, only warm. A stray royal cat and a ghoul who collects bones, you think, but then the ghoul sighs and turns. You should feel rejected from the way he presents his back to you, but you suspect that it has something to do with him coming alive downstairs.

And you cling to him.

He doesn’t rip you off of him as you slip a hand under his arm and bend against him, like a river otter who just found a fat clam. His solemn breaths lull you to sleep, and he stays still for you: all night until the birds start to sing and the sun warms your face, the whole heap of you two.

Like a big pile of snow, melting on a summer’s day…

[writingwithfolklore]

A Note for New Writers

                When I started this blog, one of my goals was to compile advice that I hadn’t really seen online anywhere. Stuff a little bit beyond the foundations I was already very familiar with. I took university courses and different approaches to writing combined with my own experience and lessons from the mentors and teachers around me, and began to write it all down to share with you.

                The idea was never that you would start writing your first character with Character is Plot say. However, I noticed there are a lot of new, beginner, or learning writers on here, and there’s a great value in really nailing the foundations, so here marks the start of a short series of foundational advice for you new writers (or for writers who have been around the block and may need a refresher. I know I do!)

                I see a lot of new writers in the tags looking down on yourselves or your ability. Stuff like, ‘why can’t I seem to do this’ or ‘if only I could actually follow this advice’. My posts were never meant to make you feel like you aren’t good enough. It was written with over a decade of experience behind it. It takes time to build those instincts in knowing what to do. Unfortunately you can’t just build writing skill by reading and collecting articles—they can be a guide, but they aren’t meant to instantly come naturally to you “if only you were a good writer.”

No one can automatically learn how to write just from reading some advice because writing skill isn’t about the knowing, it’s about the practicing.

                And it takes a hell of a lot of practice.

                Writing is mostly intuition—we practice certain skills to get them to a place where we can just do them without really thinking about it. It’s kind of like when you were learning to type, and you had to constantly remind yourself to put periods at the ends of your sentences. Then, over time and a million reminders, you started to just do it on instinct without really thinking about it.

                It’s muscle memory, it’s trying again and again, it’s a lot of struggling and tears and feedback and more tears and a million and one false starts and unfinished drafts and finished drafts that are really bad and lost contests and rejections. I have been through it all. I’m still going through it all. Only recently have I been published—it took me over a decade of practice to get there. Oh, and in the same month one of my pieces was published, another was rejected.

                That’s how it goes. It’s not some switch that will one day flick where you’re ‘good enough’. And the timeline isn’t so set. While I was working on building up skill, I was also working on building up confidence. In the right publications, with enough confidence, I probably could’ve been published years ago. In the right place, and if you’re brave enough to submit, you probably could too.

                It’s about who sees it, very rarely does it really depend on how ‘good’ it is (and you can tell from all the published work that can’t possibly be better than your unpublished work, right?)

                TL;DR, writing isn’t about the knowing, it’s about time, patience, and practice. If you’re reading advice and don’t feel good enough to execute on it, just take a little bit more time and get a hundred thousand more words under your belt. One day, it will just become intuition.

You will get there.

[matenrou-fan]

~Intoxication~

Me: oh I just will take a day off from Tumblr! *writing the biggest fic I ever made.*

Anyways this idea was in my mind for a pretty long time but I was kinda indecisive to start this work. Feel more nervous than when I posted another pretty dirty fic as this time it's much harsher. So please read tags carefully.

Intoxication of love.. or of lust? Diavolo didn't know himself what exactly was outweighed in his chest, but there's something he knows for sure - he'll make you his today.

femreader, possessive!Diavolo, delusional!Diavolo, aphrodisiac, oral (receiving), fingering (receiving), dirty talk, crempie, drugging, dumbification, non-con, slut shaming, Master/slave undertones;; 3914 words;; Please contact me if you think I forgot to add something!

NSFW UNDER THE CUT

;MINORS DNI;

Just another evening in Demon Lord's Castle.. Well, at least from your point of view, as everything was so casual, casual as it was a few days ago, and a week ago, and a month ago. There's no fear or thrilling excitement that tickles in your chest when you visit such a luxurious place for the first few times. And of course you stop seeing Lord Diavolo as someone authoritative and powerful, more like a good friend who you don't mind to tease sometimes.

But that's what he's needed, that's what he expected to see - a zero suspicion or careful attention from you. And that is what would help him to put his plan into practice.

"Mm, s/o, you're here! I was waiting for you." - With a usual big smile he got closer, flung out his arms in a lavish gesture.

All speeches are well prepared. All his actions, every movement is well prepared. Not too perfect to evoke a feeling of falseness, but without any wild surprises, keeping your guard down.

Today he's more collected than before his official meetings or important events. Why? Because losing his status or just getting a little confused on scene is not bothering his heart as much as thoughts about losing you on a strange path of your relationship with demons around. Moving closer to one demon brother, than to another, like a little brat that just plays on crossroads but never stepping too far away in one certain direction. And moreover, never looking in his way, stepping on Diavolo's side only when you're too bored and have no right mood with these seven jerks. You just know how to play with their hearts, and today there would be a punishment. Don't want to get closer on your own? Be ready that sooner or later there will be a strong arm that just finally drags you to one of the ways. And the young Lord is willing to make you fall into his ground. To his feet.

"Sorry that I didn't text you back sooner.. Was a little bit busy." - your soft smile is adorable, but he notices how the corners of your lips twitch a little before lifting up. Oh, busy? You always have this 'guilty smile', that's what he called it, when getting late in RAD or in his Castle, or somewhere else, just because you were having fun with someone else, not because you're busy. Foolish and so air headed outside, Diavolo actually carefully remembered all pieces of information about you, all these small differences in your reactions..

"Ah, it's okay! I'm ready to forgive you, but only if you would tell me what happened.." - no indication of envy or anger, only this slight flirt that he always did, which always makes you think you're in charge and can tease him a little.

"Oh, nothing too serious. You know, just Mammon again is-"

Listening to your voice while you two sit at the table, Diavolo truly listens to all this nonsense, showing his usual reaction - laugh and just a little bit of jealousy about you all having such a good time in House of Lamentation. But it's just a piece of his attention, when inside his thoughts were far away from all these demons, as he concentrated on a cup of herbal tea in your arm. Almost full without a few sips, maybe he should shut your mouth a little and tell you something too so you would pay more attention to your drink? Effect would last pretty long yet his patience is otherwise.

♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡

"Really? I never knew that.." - you mumble, smiling weakly as you look at your almost empty cup. It was such a pretty long day, that's why you suddenly start feeling kinda strange? Something like drowsiness, but at the same time like a second wind too.. Like if you didn't sleep for a few days and all your motions get so slow but suddenly a new wave of energy hits your body.. But not in some fresh way, as these goosebumps on your skin make you heated up. It's like it hits not your whole insides, but only the lower part…? The more you try to describe your own feelings, the more confused you get. Such a mix of thoughts in your head makes you dizzy.

Oh. oh. And of course Diavolo quickly noticed that. Who, as if not your generous, kind and cheerful friend who invited you to visit him today, will help you now?

"S/o, is everything alright?" - the itch to add some slight mockery in his tone was almost irresistible, but that's too early for something like that. There's plenty of time for him to have some fun with vengeance for all days that you ignored him..

"No, I think I just don't sleep that well tonight.." - a small trembling sigh escapes your lips, as you rub your temple in circle motions. But thoughts keep fading away in the middle of sentences, how can you even explain to him properly this strange sudden fatigue?

"Hm, maybe we should have a little walk around my Castle? It always helps me feel a little bit more fresh.."

Diavolo's right, as it helps you too sometimes, especially when you just want to clear your head, like right now.

But today the corridors of his residence were more like a labyrinth, and even familiar places were so far away and strange for you. Necessity of carrying on a conversation did not divert you from this nagging waves of pain, and the cheerful, unstoppable bubbling of the young Lord just turns your mind into a complete mush. Where were your thoughts, and where was his one, that he pushed in your mind with this chirping..? Your weak whining was the only response to his question that you didn't even understand. Perfect.

"S/o..?" - Snaps of fingers were so close to your nose but you didn't even react that well, only shrugging a little. You lazily turned to face Diavolo, but not for scolding him for such boorish behavior, your minds didn't even produce a thought about this being disrespectful or just strange. You turn just because he attracted your attention in this way, that's it, and Diavolo loves how quickly you get so obedient. What else can he try then?

"You hear me? Are you alright?" - This time there's undisguised mockery, yet you didn't get mad, once again. And even when he steps closer and squeezes your waist with his hands, in a pretty firm grip on purpose, you only furrow your brows and mumble:

"Dia.. Wha.." - Without that much resistance. The way you place your hands on his shoulders even can be called like some romantical move, only slight attempts of pushing tells him that you're not really understand what's going on. Maybe even not like it or hate it, in the very depth of your minds, where his drug didn't reach for now? But it just turns him more.

That's it. You ARE weak now. The kindness and compassion have left, leaving you with a cold, dominant demon - one who is in control.

Throwing away this obligation of controlling his wishes, he drops his hands on your hips and moves you closer to himself with one quick, harsh pull. Warmth of your body was intoxicating, almost a Siren's call but in physical form. He even can feel slight movements of fingers that were now sandwiched between your and his chest. Honey, are you still trying to push him away?

"Dia.. It's wrong.." - And there's a Siren's call itself. Weak call that shows just how dizzy you are, how far away from reality.. A call to destroy your minds completely.

His hands squeezed your ass, pushing you closer and higher, on the same level to his face. Already on weak legs, all you can do to scoot up is just lean to Diavolo's body, letting him manhandle you now.

Somewhere through this fog in your brains you hear your own scream that beg to fight, to push him away. Somewhere through this wild burn in your body you feel some kind of fear and disgust, that telling you this is not a right way to do the thing, that something is wrong.. But these smacks of a little desperation were too weak to make a breach in the wall of thick, strange arouse that start arising in your bosom from such close contact with another body. Moreover, every minor thought faded away under pressure of Diavolo's lips.

It's more like he tries to devour you than kiss, pushing his tongue inside your mouth without warning as soon as you just gasp from his tight grasp on your ass. Rolls his tongue over and around your own, pushing it as deeply into your narrow mouth as he can, Diavolo didn't pay any attention to a new way of struggling from your side. Or maybe he feels every small push, enjoying it?

Tickles of the tip of his tongue on your palate sends waves of goosebumps directly in your minds, making your whole body hummed in response. And small vibrations of your moans titillate both you and him, boiling your already heated up minds.

Even a loud thud of the door behind you didn't bother you that much, and only when Diavolo pulled away himself, throwing on the mattress, did you wake up. Just a little, only able to realize you're in another room, with a big soft bed underneath you.

It's actually his bedroom that you visited oh so many times yet never leave your scent on his pillows or sheets, sitting only on the same couch every time. But right now whatever sense you got left in your brains wasn't enough to remember that, or even to panic from the fact you got dragged here and didn't even notice this. Everything was concentrated on Diavolo, who's towering over you, and on this burning feeling in your chest that makes it hard to breathe.

"You look so much better like this, darling." - It’s like a lover’s whisper but there’s a cruel, depraved edge to it that chills the heart. It’s almost like the whisper of a predator that knows its prey is helpless and won’t escape no matter how much it struggles. - "So much better with me, than with anyone else.."

The moment you weakly open your mouth to mumble some nonsense he gobbles you up again, no less but even more hungrily than before. Even Diavolo himself didn't know his appetite for you was so wild, but now, when he finally unleashes his true intentions, that doesn't matter. He can do anything he wants with you, and as long as he wants..

Every touch and kiss lewding you in some dirty, twisted way. Trails of his hands on your body were like burning sharp knives, like electrical discharges that increased this unbearable heat. Fragile whine in his mouth was the only retort you were capable of, but for Diavolo it sounds like some needy beg rather than a strong protest. You're not asking to leave you alone, you're asking to reduce this dizzying temperature in your insides.

Ripping and throwing away all your clothes sounds like a good help, isn't it? Your arms falling slack on sheets, too powerless to resist his actions, so pretty soon the only thing that hid your body from his sharp gaze was your underwear.

Just for a moment Diavolo pulled away to admire this new view that he imagined in his dreams for so long - round chest heaves with your deep, unsteady breaths, and your stomach rises and falls with each. Smoothest of your skin was on a higher level than any expensive, luxury fabric he ever was able to touch. And this scent.. No one of all incubus or succubus can compare with this throbbing seduction of your smell. But doesn't this mean he's the victim here, acting under the charm of your beauty?

"It's all your fault, s/o.." - leaning closer, he groans in your ear. Maybe you don't really understand what he's talking about, as every small brush of his skin on your naked one interrupts any incipient thoughts, but it doesn't mean he has no right to tell all these things that are stored up in the depth of his soul. - "Everything could have been different if you wouldn't be like that, playing and fucking around with everyone.."

He grabs your chin to make look up at him - eyes have taken on a distant look, and your lips are trembling, trying to breathe more.. Yes, you definitely almost don't understand him, only sligh shine of confusion and fear in your eyes through a fog of lust can be seen. But it's better like this, cause now you at least don't resist his action.

Long, wet path of kisses on your body, as if Diavolo tries to mark every small part of your skin with his lips. The closer he moves to your trembling hips, the more sloppy his movements get, and when he finally stops right in front of your waistband, heavily breathing, his kisses are more reminiscent of some hungry impatient licks. Hot unsteady breath makes you whimper again and you look at him with half-lidded eyes, confused with his action. Your body is being flooded with a mix of unreal arouse and some creeping fear. Maybe this drug was good enough to turn your brains and body into a complete mess, but something in your guts keeps screaming to stop this.

"Dia.. Don't.. S-stop.."

"Don't stop? Of course, my darling.." - a low growl as his lips are within a breath of distance from your clit.

He presses his whole face to your cunt, drowning into warm wetness and intoxicating scent. Thin fabric of your panties was more like a tease for you when he started licking your folds right through panties. Like some poor, starving for months puppy, he pounced upon your pussy like it was a sacred dish.

His big hands moved from your waist to your thighs, spreading them apart as you kept squeezing them together and bothering his fun. One warning bite on your inner thigh before he pulled down your underwear with his teeth.

For a moment your and his eyes meet each other, as if he gives you another warning to not keep being a brat even in such a state and just gives him what he wants.

But his visage started to warp, along with this stern look - you break. Moaning, you toss your head back and lift your hips, begging to continue. All last hopes and screams leave your mind, nagging, painful ache that was waiting for release, win.

"That's it. What a fucking good girl you can be.."

Leaving your legs apart, he moved his hand to open your labia. Small throbbing clit, and this clenching around nothing hole.. His own dick twitch, so hard and hot in his pants, but Diavolo can wait just a little bit more to play all his fantasies.

Nimble fingers up against a bundle of nerves, then upwards, enjoying every millimeter. Such a small thing and such a light stroke, yet your whole body hummed in response. Slowly moving up and down, then in circular movements, Diavolo remembered every reaction, every gasp and whimper along with sudden shrugs of your shoulders or legs.. Do you not love like this, and prefer like that? He'll keep that in mind for the future, when you wake from drugs just to see him ready to repeat everything.

His fingers get lower, playing between folds, soaking in your juices while he presses his mouth to your clit. Just a small kiss, as he squeezes a sensitive spot with his lips, but your voice immediately gets higher, hips lift even more, as if you try to find more friction. What a cute reaction.. Opening his mouth and sucking your clit in, at the same time pushing it with his tongue, he didn't move his eyes from your face even for a second, devouring every slight twitch of your brows or lips. The way you start whining more, the way your needy cunt clenches more every time his fingers pressed around your entrance… In Diavolo's mind it means only one thing - there's no way you're enjoying this only because of befuddling drugs, you're enjoying it because you're just a little obedient slave that waited to be taken in some harsh and rough way. And Diavolo doesn't mind to show who's your master now.

Even when he pushes his finger in, without any warnings, you didn't pried him off, but moved further, letting him sink inside you and he quickly added another finger. Are you so loosened up because of an aphrodisiac he also added to this tea, or is it just a normal reaction of your body when somebody is being so irreverent with you? Thoughts about you always being like this just for him, only for him, always ready to feel him inside you and being so obediently silent with your disagreements but so loud with your sinful moans.. It's starting to be unbearable for him too, so his fingers quickly get in pretty fast pace, stretching your walls.

"You liked it, didn't you? You liked being such a fucking slut.." - Diavolo groans, tickling your clit with a low husky breath. Weak gasp from your lips didn't sound like a good response, so he disdainfully squeezed your tensed nerves between his teeth, just a little, but enough to draw more pleasant to his ears high pitched whine from your chest. - "Keep showing me how you like that.."

Like if your body is drawn to follow the orders of the young Lord, you immediately moan again, but this time from a strong aggressive hit of his fingers inside you cunt. Your surroundings began to swim with every thrust, as your hips jut upwards in one rhythm with his hand. Pulsation in your core reaches its peak, making you shudder in agony of enthralling pleasure, before you cum.

Such a strong wave that it is almost painful, like some piercing discharge. Your muscles feel more relaxed yet your insides are not revealed but filled even more with some dirty coercion to ache and beg for another release, and then for another and another.. Like you never would be satisfied, feeling this yearning that is amplified with drugs in your body again and again. And Diavolo knows that, ready to use you, who's now at his disposal, till blackness would crowd in on your vision and you would fall into deep narcotic sleep… Or maybe even after that?

Low groan thundered on the whole room when his now exposed dick twitch from cold air. Diavolo leans closer and grope your waist, almost buries you under his weight when his flushed head glides down your folds and presses to your clenching cunt, mixing his precum with your juices. Your hips wiggled a bit to grind back to his cock and he can't help but smirk, enjoying the way you completely forget about your arrogant behavior and get so obedient.. so needy to his dick. Now he just needs to make sure to pound you so good that you will be like that even without any aphrodisiac.

Pushing himself deep inside your wet cunt, he froze for a moment. Not to make you get used to his pretty thick length, but to give himself some time to overcome his strong goosebumps from your tightness. It feels much better than he ever can imagine, than he ever can make himself feel with the calloused seal of his own hand.. Almost if he's the one who's being corrupted here, not you.

He starts to slide back his cock out of your pussy and then to slide in with more force, just to experience this tickle on the back of his head once more. There's no way he can be gentle even in the beginning, when you lewding him like that with these pathetic whines. You wrap your legs around his wait yourself, you just BEG to be fucked, not crying to stop. Even your grasp on his shoulders is just the way to show your desire and these scratches from your nails on his skin is just a passion, he knows for sure.

Hovering over you like a predator over his prey, he just starts thrusting in some aggressive speed, stretching your walls with such force it's turning your minds into havoc. More marks on your body - kisses, hickeys, scratches - he will make sure there's no place that he didn't touch with his lips or didn't grope with his hands.

But the main act that will reinforce his point of owning you is only in the future, but his dick already starts grinding from thoughts about filling your pussy with his cum again and again. And even if you would be too full to take more with this greedy cunt, there's another holes in your body he would be glad to fulfill to the very end.

"You were waiting for it, didn't you? Whining my name like a little bitch in heat." - he whispered right in your ear but even such close contact didn't help to get his words into your empty head. Your mouth moved on its own, calling him in desperate moans as you didn't know yourself if you actually started begging for more or still resisting his wild urges.. But did it actually matter at such a moment? As there is no escape from the suffocating delight of unravel underneath him.

Your pussy starts to spasm, ready for another breakneck orgasm. And you feel his dick grinding against your walls in response, spreading soaking precum inside you. Grasp on your waist was strong enough to break a bone, but Diavolo moved one arm to hold your chin in the same firm grip and make you look up at him. He just wants to see how your eyes would be darkened by another wave of pleasure, how you would look when he finally made you completely his.. Rough sloppy kiss before he slammed his dick fully inside you, shooting hot sperm in your cervix. Tightening around the base of his dick, your cunt was almost milking him, sucking every drop with wild pulsations.

Some sort of sore starts nagging in your body and you collapse on the bed, mewling for some break. But only a few seconds was enough to catch a breath to a demon, as he started moving again even in a more aggressive way, slapping your hips with his own. None of your whines never would be considered as asking to stop, Diavolo just doesn't hear any painful undertones on your voice, just some luring possession that resonates with his delusional mind.

His dick was stiff again, hitting your sensitive spot with swollen glans with every thrust. Hitting your whole body with new waves that turn you more and more into some dumb, empty doll for his wishes and desires.

Diavolo will make sure to turn you into some obedient cock slave through some good punishment for all this time he was the one who's missed you. Now it's his time to be in charge and make you beg, and yearn, and cry for him.. to make you addicted to his love.. or lust?

[qqueenofhades]

Last anon here -- I'm sorry for sending that message through. I don't know what is and isn't true anymore.

I deleted what I presume was your first ask (the one accusing me of not condemning the Gaza genocide and calling me a "DNC shill and a liar") because it was rude, uncalled for, and I couldn't see any good to come of engaging with it. However, because you've returned and apologized and sent this followup, I am willing to answer it, because I am aware that we can all do stupid things (especially on the internet) that we regret. So there is that.

Once again: I have strictly limited my posts/reblogs on this topic because it is so inflammatory, there are reams of people willing to attack you on every side, and none of it is actually constructive (this is the blue hellsite where we have two whole jokes about Ea-Nasir and color theory in children's hospitals. We are not doing important social justice work here and expecting this to be the main/only forum in which we post the Correct Opinions is not going to work out for anyone). But I would like, for the record, to point out that I have condemned the situation in Gaza and explicitly called it a genocide and Netanyahu and co. war criminals. Often and repeatedly:

Ask from October 28, 2023:

What’s happening to the Gazans right now is no qualification or equivocation, a genocide. It should rightfully be opposed and called what it is. But unfortunately, I have spent too much time around Western Online Leftists to believe they actually care a whit about stopping genocide as a fundamental principle, and only want to be seen to loudly care about what their Ideology has told them to care about. [...] To put it bluntly, those genocides are being committed by nation-states that Online Leftists like for being “anti-Western,” and therefore their activities are actually fine and should even need to be defended.

Another post from December 2023 explicitly calling out Netanyahu and his cabinet, while also pointing out that Tumblr's response now mostly consisted of antisemitic dogwhistles and rampant political misinformation:

[...] the way Netanyahu is personally a genocidal maniac with a far-right cabinet of war criminals and is bent on continuing the war in order to escape his own criminal prosecutions (and yes, he is HIGHLY affiliated with Trump and Putin) but this somehow still does not remotely justify or excuse the rampant frothingly mindless and generalized anti-Semitism seen everywhere on leftist spaces these days [....]

An ask from January 10th, 2024 (worth probably reading in full) where I once more say that nobody wants this to be happening, but that once again, the criticism in Western leftist forums (particularly Tumblr/Twitter) is not made equally or in good faith :

Nobody of basic good sense and decency wants to see Gaza leveled while the Israeli state continues to apply a number of violently cruel collective punishments even outside the actual daily bombing of civilians. But for the love of god, let’s get rid of the idea that the continued mindless violence doesn’t benefit Hamas (because it does; unsurprisingly, sympathy for their cause has soared in Gaza) as much as it does Israel, or that Hamas is some kind of benevolent peacemaker that is being thwarted by the cruel imperialist US/West.

This post, also from January 2024, explains why the kind of stunt-trick "pro Palestinian" activism that just relies on publicly hassling Jews is a) antisemitic and b) actively harming the people of Gaza, while once again pointing out whose fault this whole mess actually is:

If these people actually wanted to advocate constructively for Palestine in a good-faith way and not just punish random Jews or people who might have once met a Jew (which they don’t), they would take a look at that, go “hmm, this isn’t really getting the right result” and listen to the people who are telling them that by generating this bad publicity, they are doing far more harm to the cause than good. They are going to make the cause look foolish, they will drive away anyone who isn’t already radicalized, they will shut down any possibility of discussion and dialogue, and their efforts will be picked up in the Israeli nationalist right-wing media/Netanyahu and his war criminal advisors to insist to left-wing or anti-zionist Jews that (one of the, you know, big fucking reasons Israel was founded in the first place) they aren’t safe in any other country in the world, and they need to support the Israeli government’s actions, no matter how heinous.

A follow-up from January 31, 2024, discussing (again) the problems with insisting that Biden personally/the American power apparatus is just giving Israel a blank check and therefore Biden Iz Bad And This is All His Fault:

Once again: I strongly disagree with the idea of just giving Israel/Netanyahu a blank check to keep committing atrocities, but I also need to repeatedly point out that Biden isn’t doing that. His initial unconditional support of Israel after October 7 (which at the time was the correct response) has shifted to a much more measured and conditional approach where he has muted the overtly pro-Israel statements and started talking about a two-state solution and the need to protect the lives of civilians and trying to keep a lid on what could become a REALLY bad situation with all kinds of war-hungry powers eager to jump into the Middle East and blow it completely to hell.

I am a historian. This does not mean that I always know The Greatest Things Ever, but it does mean that I default toward long, cautious, and qualified responses where I try to consider multiple perspectives and nuances, rather than just posting pithy soundbites or black-and-white statements. (Yes, I know; I am doomed on social media.) Thus when I do discuss the situation, I tend toward trying to put it in broader context, to push back sharply against the idea that being "pro Palestine" is just being wildly antisemitic on social media and nothing else, and to call out those bad actors who are using this situation to continue to imperil American democracy and deliberately try to get Trump (who openly hankers to be a genocidal fascist dictator for everyone, not just Israel/Palestine) back into office.

I know that this is a situation which provokes (to say the least) strong emotions from everyone. I know that it's infuriating to feel totally helpless and just to have to watch it from afar. I know that we all wish we could stop it and that leads us to create meaning or assign importance to our own actions where there actually is none. But that does not mean that people have total liberty to spread antisemitic conspiracy theories, wild political misinformation, narratives designed whether unwittingly or deliberately to help Trump and other far-right fascists, and otherwise anonymously dogpile on people who haven't Posted The Correct Opinion on Tumblr (once again, Tumblr, where we get our news via Destiel meme). So I hope this has helped you, if this is what you wanted to get out of contacting me today, and hope also that you'll continue to think about what to do and how to act. It's hard, I know, and you have my sympathy. But so it is for us all.

[sunshinetoshi]

a solid pair

kuroo x reader (<1k words)

content (warnings): fluff

a/n: i was going to wait until kuroo’s bday to post this but i simply -cannot wait- it’s been a fat minute since i’ve written anything more than thoughts into my notes app so if this is bad i will pretend it’s not. self-confidence. also bless romcoms for making me rot for love once more.

“I have a question.”

“I have an answer.”

“What do you want for your birthday?”

His chest rumbles in soft laughter beneath you. He hums in thought before responding, “I’m going to give a kind-of answer because I already know you’re not going to settle with me saying I don’t need anything.”

You nod your head, “You’d be correct. Like give me ideas or a price range that makes you comfy. I have a couple different ideas but I wanted to ask you.” You sat up to give him a proper look in his eyes, “Just amuse me, it’s the first birthday we’re spending together and I want us to both be comfortable with how we celebrate. It’s unknown territory,” you hold a hand out to him like you’re making a deal, “help me out here.”

He grins before pushing your hand out of the way and engulfing you into a hug. “All right give me second.” He rubs small circles into your back. “Hm.. Don’t get me anything fancy, so definitely nothing expensive. But I don’t want to say anything specific. I want to be surprised. Helpful?”

“Just barely,” you huff in a faux dramatic tone, “But yes, helpful.”

“Hey, if you really want an honest answer you could get me a rock and I’d love it.”

“A rock.”

“Yes, a rock.”

“You joke a lot, you know.”

He shook his head, “I’m not joking around, I’d love it and I’d love it because it’s from you.”

———

“Socks?” Your friend stops in their tracks.

You nod without taking your eyes off of the displays you’re scanning, “Mhm, socks.”

“Please explain before I cast judgement.”

“We’re at the mall getting socks because he has said so many times he - quote unquote - loves funky socks. And he’s always wearing a different pair when I see him so why not add to the collection?”

“Funky how?”

“Funky like his favorite pair have cats on it. As in he prefers striped or polka dot socks over plain ones. As in he complains when he has to wear plain ones for fancy events.” You smile remembering the last big meeting he had and the little grumble Tetsurou made as he put his socks on.

“Aw, I guess that’s nice then. Okay you said there was a another part to your gift?”

“Yeah, and if you’re loving this side quest you’re gonna love the next - oh! These! He loves space and these lil guys are way cuter aliens than the other socks.” You hold up the pair for your friend and they laugh in disbelief.

———

You can’t help but join your friend in laughing at yourself.

“You look ridiculous!”

“I feel it too but I need to find a good one. Just stand watch and tell me if anyone’s coming.”

You continue your search, picking out select candidates when you realize after quite a while your friend is no longer giggling at you.

You turn you turn your head and look up at them. Their grin is wide. “What?” you ask, cracking a smile of your own.

“This is too cute.”

“What is?”

“You’re squatting like a kid looking for the perfect rock to give your boyfriend because he said he’d be happy even if you have him a rock for his birthday. You’re like a little penguin and it’s really really cute.”

You give a bashful smile and go back to searching for the perfect one.

———

“Did you get full?” Tetsurou gives your leg a gentle shake from the driver’s seat.

“I did.” You take in the smile on his face. “How’s your birthday so far?”

He shakes his head. “Oh man, a great day at work and a great evening with you with great food? Pretty great.” He gives a cheeky grin.

“Good,” you respond, satisfied with his answer. “But actually I have one more surprise,” you reach down to your jacket on the floor of the passenger seat - where you had been hiding his present.

You hold it out to him and expect him to giddily open it up. But he grabs it with care and takes it in. This was a softer smile than you usually see on him and when he turned to look at you you swear his eyes had a brighter twinkle.

“Thank you, really. I was serious, you didn’t have to get me anything,” he grabs your hand and gives it a squeeze. “I’m gonna treasure whatever is in this box.”

“See what’s inside first,” you give his hand a squeeze of your own before dropping it so he has both hands free.

He chuckles and begins to untie the ribbon of the box. “Dang,” he lifts the box up closer to the car light above him, “This is a nice box. This is present enough.” Back to his teasing self.

“Open it,” you laugh.

“Okay, okay, but I’m serious. I’m keeping this box. it’s fantastic.” He lifts the lid and after of beat of silence of him processing what he sees he lets out a deep laugh at the rock sitting in the box. “A rock?” He laughs again before looking at you, “I love it.” He lifts it to get a closer look, reading aloud the tiny letters you carefully (stressfully) wrote on one side of the rock.

Happy Birthday Tetsu ♡

He traces over the date and your name you also wrote. He rolls the rock in his hand, tossing it a couple times. “This is like the perfect shape too. You know what, I’m putting this on my desk, that way I can look at it everyday.” He smiles at it once more before reaches over and gives you a big warm hug, “Thank you.”

“You’re welcome,” you giggle before bringing his attention back to the box, “there’s more - just a little something.”

He lifts the piece of paper you used to separate the two parts of your gift.

“Socks!” He takes them out and looks at the design on both pairs. “Aw I love them! Hey these are great quality, they’re thick. Look at this one with the little aliens. And this one,” he lifts the other pair, “Is your aesthetic to a T.”

“That’s what I said!” you exclaimed in excitement.

He laughed at the outburst. “Then clearly,” he put each pair on either side of his face, “We’re the perfect pair.”

And maybe it was how he appreciated the small things. Maybe it was how his jokes, though corny, always made you smile. For reasons, emotions, beyond you, you decide then that yes - he’s the one.

hi!! given it’s been almost 2 years since i’ve written anything here i will no longer being doing taglists. ty for reading thooo <3

[gallusrostromegalus]

so if AEIWAM has Rukia starting off as lieutenant, what's the justification for sending her to the Living World at the beginning of the story?

(in the manga, she doesn't get the lieutenant's position until after the end of the Soul Society Arc, even though everyone agrees she's the obvious candidate for it. the position is left vacant after Kaien Shiba's death, with the actual duties being split between 13th company's two 3rd seat officers -- whose names ofc I don't remember, but one of them is Isane Kotetsu's younger sister?)

(I seem to remember Rukia initially not actually having *any* officer's seat because Byakuya wanted her kept away from the more dangerous missions. which is why she's on bog-standard Hollow patrol at the beginning of the series)

(idk if this throws a wrench in your worldbuilding, but you've got a whole construction site going on so what's one more trip hazard? 😅)

About four months before the canon series begins:

-----

Ukitake probably would have been less upset if he'd received the message at the office. Or in person.

Instead, the message had been delivered to him by private courier at his home, right in the middle of dinner. Interrupting his dinner after a long day was enough of a reason for Ukitake to read the boy the riot act, but the sheer- What the hell was he thinking? Was he thinking at all??

He squinted at the letter again. Technically, it was only sent to him on the order of "The Kuchiki Clan" so this could, theoretically, be the nonsense of several different people, and not necessarily Byakuya specifically.

"Best to go address them collectively." He sighed, folding up the letter, sticking it inside his robe, and getting up.

"Sentaro? Kiyone?" he called from the hallway, putting on his Captain's Haori, as this was Official Business. "I need to step out for a bit, you two are in charge until I get back."

"Sir!" Sentaro saluted with enough force that he winced from hitting himself in the head.

"Let me come with you!" Kiyone said cheerfully.

"No, this is a private matter. You stay here and make sure the Division doesn't catch fire." Ukitake said, tying Sogyo No Kotowari to his belt. Hopefully it wouldn't come to that, but the average mule could learn a thing or five about stubbornness from Byakuya and a show of force might be necessary. He waved to his two third-seats, and stepped out the door.

It wasn't a long walk, but the cool night air gave him some time and space to think.

Someone in the Kuchiki clan had filed a Legal Injunction to prevent the promotion of one Rukia Kuchiki to any seated officer's position. It had arrived less than an hour after Ukitake had sent in the paperwork to finally fill his long-open lieutenant's position, and Rukia wasn't back from her patrol in the Rukongai, so it wasn't Rukia who had told them. Someone was keeping a much-too-close eye on the 13th's operations, and interference like this was dangerous as well as disrespectful.

There was a brief pause at the front gate of the compound where the new guard attempted to rebuff Ukitake by saying he needed to have an appointment.

Hm. I actually am angry. Ukitake decided, as the little prick went on about the importance of security to the clan. He turned away from the guard, squared up in front of the gate, and with a moment's concentration, he kicked through the bar and both doors to the gate neatly off their hinges, quietly enjoying the way one of them cartwheeled over the grounds and around the main building until it came to a stop with a loud splash inside the koi pond.

"Ah. Ukitake-Taicho is on his way to the main house." The guard said over his communicator as Ukitake strode into the compound, having done a very sensible about-face. "Perhaps open the main doors for him."

Indeed, he watched the servants scramble to open the main doors to the house, the maid taking her post to greet him and the others scuttling away at speed to not be on the scene, one of them going so far as to dive into a nearby bush.

"Welcome Ukitake-taicho." Bowed the maid. "The family is currently at dinner."

"Oh good I can speak to all of them!" He beamed, breezing past her and any pretense of etiquette and striding into the family home.

There was an ominous rustle of blossoms in the courtyard.

"I love him like a son, Senbonzakura, but he's behaving rather badly and needs to be corrected." Ukitake explained, not breaking his stride save to give the zanpaktou a sideways glance. "-Unless this is somehow Ginrei's tomfoolery, in which case your master will probably turn him inside out before I have the chance."

Satisfied, the ancient tree stilled.

"Thank you." Ukitake nodded, turning down the hall and came to the dining room, whose doors seem to have been surreptitiously left open rather than risk the wrath of his foot.

"Jushiro," Byakuya spoke calmly as though this were no more than a social call. "-this is a surprise."

"It is a surprise!" Ukitake agreed, voice strained as he tried to keep his tone lighthearted, tossing the legal injunction onto the table. "-I thought you all knew better than to try to tell me how to run my division!"

Byakuya, two of his uncles, a spare cousin and a handful of houseguests all stared at the letter.

"Sorry to interrupt dinner, but the letter only designates that the directive has come from a clan member so I'm not entirely sure whose nonsense this is." Ukitake explained, hands casually on his hips as he waited for an answer.

Byakuya took a sip of water, set his glass down, delicately dabbed his lips dry, and then stood up. "It is my directive, and no-one else's." Behind him, Ginrei reached over to swipe the document from the table and read it at speed. "I think that I've been quite reasonable, given the circumstances."

"Would you like to elaborate on your reasoning here?" Ukitake asked, a sentence that most people recognized as a giant red flag to about face on whatever they had been doing.

If Byakuya had a spiritual animal though, it was probably a Bull, and he interpreted the red flag as a signal to charge. "Given the paucity of heirs the Kuchiki Clan possess, as the head of the family I cannot allow any member to be exposed to an unnecessarily risky position. I am perfectly content for Rukia to be a shinigami but I cannot condone the additional risk of being a seated officer, let alone a lieutenant."

"Are you INSANE?" Hissed Ginrei, staring bug-eyed at his grandson.

"I don't see what all the fuss is about." Byakuya huffed.

Ukitake pressed his hands together in front of his face and sighed deeply. Ah. Yep. That's what I thought.

"Captain Kuchiki." He said, tipping his hands forward for emphasis. "Do you want to step out into the garden with me?"

"Not particularly. I am in the middle of-" Byakuya began and Ginrei grabbed the entire tablecloth in both hands and pulled, ripping the entire meal from the table with a loud shattering of dishware and even Byakuya flinched at the severity of the display.

"OH HOW CLUMSY OF ME." he snarled at his grandson, sauce dripping off his kimono. "Why don't you take our guest out to the garden while this gets cleaned up?"

"...Yes." Byakuya muttered. "I understand the Koi pond has a new architectural feature."

Out in the garden, it was darker, calmer, and easier to speak freely.

"Do you remember the oaths you took when you joined the court guard, and the additional ones you took as captain?" Ukitake asked as they stood in front of the Kio Pond and observed the actually rather aesthetically pleasing way the door had managed to land mostly upright with one end buried in the mud at the and then tipped just enough to be caught by one of the carefully placed standing stones in the middle of the pond, fish gumming at it excitedly.

"I do solemnly swear that I will support and defend the Citizens of the Soul Society against all enemies, foreign and domestic, that I will bear true faith and allegiance to the Court Guard and None Other, that I take this obligation freely, without any compulsion, reservation or secret purpose, and that I will faithfully discharge the duties of the office on which I am about to enter." Byakuya recited easily.

"Good, good- um." Ukitake rubbed his hands and grimaced as he tried to figure out how to put this "-That bit about 'allegiance to the Court Guard and None Other' You understand what that part means, right?"

"That I have sworn loyalty to the Court Guard and nobody else." Said Byakuya, still confused.

"Right. Right- you understand how 'Nobody Else' includes your own family, right? You're Captain first and Kuchiki second, and an injunction like this looks like the head of a Noble House interfering with the running of the Court Guard and that a hell of a lot like Sedition." Ukitake growled the last word.

Byakuya's eyes widened and he was silent for a long moment. "...Ah."

"Gods help me if Yamamoto had seen this- you understand why we have these rules, right?"

"The warring clans era-" Byakuya started.

"-was still going on when I was a boy!" Ukitake yelped. "It's not long gone-!"

"-Least of all for the Captain-General." Byakuya nodded, wincing. "I. Have made a mistake. I will withdraw the injunction immediately."

"Thank you." Ukitake sighed.

"Thank you also for your. Discretion." Byakuya said, carefully eyeing Ukitake.

"He won't hear about it from me." Ukitake put his hands up in disengagement, the major crisis averted but still- "Look. Is this about how I run my division or is it about you and Rukia?"

Byakuya watched a particularly round red carp swim by, knuckle between his teeth, before answering. "...The Latter."

Ukitake nodded slowly, and took off his captain's Haori and undid Sogyo no Kotowari from his belt, folding up the coat and setting it aside on the ground, sword atop it. "There. My Official Business is concluded. May I speak to you as a friend?"

Byakuya glanced up at him and nodded, turning to face his longtime friend-

The crack from Jushiros backhand rang out through the night loud enough to startle the fish.

"How DARE you disrespect Rukia like that? Do you think she's stupid? Weak?" Jushiro snarled, wide eyed and furious.

Byakuya didn't react for a moment out of shock. Some of his colleagues always had violence on the table as an option (Unohana could reassure someone they would be alive for a long while yet in a way that make one's blood run colder than a january morning), but coming from Ukitake was a nasty surprise, like being bitten by a previously friendly dog. Byakuya's cheekbone reddened and Jushiro tried to pretend his knuckle wouldn't be bruised in the morning, but eventually Byakuya closed his eyes, turning away from him.

"...No."

"Then what's this about?" Jushiro demanded.

"She has to do a tour in the living world to be a seated officer." Byakuya spoke quietly. "-And even someone like Kaien Shiba was killed by a Hollow."

"I know." Jushiro sighed, rubbing his brow in frustration. "I know." he repeated, softly this time, dropping his hand and grimacing.

Byakuya looked sideways at him, eyes shining.

"Believe me- I've done everything I can to prepare her for this and then some. She's as ready for this as anyone can be." Jushiro tried to reassure him. "...But you can't keep her locked away from the horrors of the universe. That'll kill her more surely than anything she might face in battle."

Byakuya sighed, rubbing his face, but nodded. "No. You're right." He mumbled, looking exhausted. "She needs to go, and I have no right to stop her."

Jushiro opened his arms, offering Byakuya an embrace, and to his surprise, Byakuya stepped in, leaning heavily on his friend's shoulder.

"It hurts." Byakuya mumbled.

"I know. Gods above, I know." Jushiro sighed, rubbing Byakuya's shoulder. "Can you believe what you just said?" Byakuya nodded into his shoulder.

"As in, can you believe it right now?"Jushiro asked, pushing Byakuya back upright and holding him by the shoulders. "Because Rukia is going to be here any-"

"NII-SAMA! NIIIII-SAMAAAAA!!" Rukia almost shrieked with joy, bounding through the house behind them and sliding onto the porch with such force that she actually slid right off it and into the garden lawn, quickly recovering and sprinting for them. "GUESS WHAT?! UKITAKE-TAICHO JUST NOMIN- oh hey Ukitake-Taicho! What are you doing here?" She started and stopped.

"I lightly misjudged your arrival home, but don't worry, I haven't told anyone yet!" he smiled cheerfully.

"Oh- Um- Ukitake-Taicho nominated me to be his Lieutenant!" She beamed, all brightness and joy at Byakuya. "This means I can finally take my tour of duty in the Living World! I know, I know it's a serious responsibility but- Oh come on! It's so cool! I'll get to see what's been going on in the human world- there's that magical Cocola Juice that Kira tried that almost cured his depression, and building with the Tests Of Skill Renji saw-oh! Maybe I'll learn how to drive an Automobile like Momo did!"

Byakuya managed to smile softly at her as she rambled about the other wonders of the living world, and put a hand on her shoulder.

"I'm very proud of you." he said, and meant it, even if he was holding back the and I'm absolutely terrified for you.

Rukia sniffled, eyes welling up with tears. "R-really?"

"Of course. You've grown into a fine shinigami. Hisana would be proud too." he smiled gently, opening his arms.

Rukia's lip wobbled, and then she tackled him for a hug, sobbing into his chest. Byakuya stroked her back as she babbled her apologies about being so excited but she's waited AGES for this and she wanted Hisana to see and-

Byakuya looked up at Jushiro as she cried, looking on the verge of tears himself. Jushiro squeezed his arm to reassure him before putting his own hand on Rukia's shoulder. "Rukia! This is a happy occasion!" he teased.

"Sorry, Ukitake-taicho." she sniffled, almost rubbing the tears away on here sleeve before stopping and pulling out a handkerchief, a habit Byakuya had spent the previous forty years ingraining into her.

"Why don't you go tell Ginrei the good news and I'll see if the kitchens can whip up something celebratory?" Jushiro smiled and Rukia nodded, bolting off, nearly sliding off the porch again, and calling for her adopted grandfather.

"Thank you, again." Byakuya whispered. "I had been exceptionally foolish. If the injunction had gone through- even without the captain-general's reaction- ...I would have terribly hurt her."

"Yes. Yes you had." Jushiro nodded. "But I'm glad I caught you in time, for both your sakes. Let's go see about getting Rukia some cake, or should we break out the good sake?" ***

The following morning, Byakuya awoke to a bright light and a piercing headache.

"Nii-sama?" Rukia called softly, and once again, Byakuya was forced to wonder what God had blessed Rukia with an apparent immunity to Hangovers.

"Rukia?" he groaned.

"Can I ask you something? Well. Two things?"

"Sure, just- ow. Come in and close the door after you?" He groaned, sitting up. Six AM, barely four hours since the party had wrapped up. Rukia entered, shutting the door against the early morning light and sitting down beside his bed.

"I- it occurred to me while I was cleaning up and I couldn't sleep, but- I promise, I won't be angry, but I need to know-" She sighed. "It's been one thing or another preventing me from doing my required tour of duty in the living world for AGES, and- You didn't have anything to do with that, did you?" Byakuya was silent for a moment. "Some of it, yes." He admitted.

"...Why?" She asked, sounding pained. "I- I promise I've trained and studied as hard as I can-"

"If something happened to you, after I promised Hisana- I- I don't know what I would do!" He snapped, entirely too distraught for this hour of the morning. "I'm sorry, Rukia. You're my sister and all I have left but it was still wrong of me to try to hold you back, just because I was scared of losing you."

Rukia stared at him, stunned, before she tackle-hugged him again, slamming him back into the bed.

"...I love you too, Nii-sama." She mumbled from the middle of his chest. "-But you are so STUPID sometimes!" she groaned from his chest.

"My Apologies." he sighed, staring up at the ceiling. "It's genetic, so you need to watch out for it too."

Rukia tipped he head up, squinting at him.

"That is. A Joke." he smiled down at her and she groaned, rolling off his chest to lie next to him, and he wrapped his arm around her shoulders, enjoying her presence while he could.

"What was the other thing you wanted to ask?" he said after a few moments of pleasant silence, the morning chorus of birds starting to sing.

"Oh yeah!" Rukia sat up, gesturing out in the general direction of the gardens with her thumb. "What's the front gate doing in the Koi pond?"

[theribbonmarkedroom]

The erasure of Andi Mack makes me so sad as someone who watched it as it was airing. I understand the show had issues regarding a Certain Actor, but it still makes me really sad for the people who worked on it. And because the show is such a gem. I want to write about Andi Mack in general one day, but because it's pride month I want to briefly talk about the show through that lens specifically.

Firstly, Andi Mack has so many episodes missing on Disney+ AND DisneyNow that it would be impossible to try to watch the series in full by using any of these apps. Until recently, DisneyNow had completely removed Andi Mack from its app, and put it back on with only an incomplete season three and without any of the games that were there originally (like Andi's Texts). This, I'm assuming, has to do with that Certain Actor, but the missing episodes has also made including Cyrus in any pride posts or collections harder than it should be (more on that in a second).

On Disney+, there is a "Pride Collection" which does not include anything Andi Mack related despite Cyrus being the first openly gay main character on Disney Channel. His coming out scenes (plural because of the individual scenes with Buffy, Andi and then Jonah) were extremely prominent not only to real people, but also to Cyrus' character as a whole. Two out of the three episodes where Cyrus comes out - "Hey, Who Wants Pizza?" (season 2, episode 1) | "Cyrus' Bash-Mitzvah!" (season 2, episode 13) | "One in a Minyan" (season 3, episode 11) - are not even available on Disney+, nor are any of them on DisneyNow (sidebar, Andi Mack isn't featured on DisneyNow 's pride section either). What's even more frustrating is that the series finale, "We Were Here", where Cyrus and TJ are confirmed to have mutual feelings for each other, are available on both Disney+ AND DisneyNow, yet it does not feature on either app's pride sections. Cyrus being gay wasn't just implied, he literally says the words "I'm gay" the third time he comes out and the second time he clearly says he has a crush on Jonah. It's not easy to overlook him as gay, and as a character who should be included in those pride collections, so his omission is clearly deliberate.

Even if the coming out episodes weren't featured, at the very least, any episode with Cyrus and TJ after they became friends should count; episodes like "For the Last Time", "The Cake That Takes the Cake", "Mount Rushmore or Less", "Something to Talk A-Boot" and of course the series finale. Surprising no one, only three of the Tyrus episodes I listed (and there are more) are actually on Disney+. I mean, they included a Miraculous episode in the Disney+ "Pride Episodes" collection that had the most minute blink-and-you'll-miss-it scene of Alec in a wig, so why not include any episode at all with TJ and Cyrus? Idk the whole thing is just very frustrating for so many reasons.

Edit: if anyone is interested in putting together a fan collection of art, stories etc etc of Andi Mack or letters detailing what the show meant to you that we could somehow share with Terri Minsky to let her know how much we appreciate her and Andi Mack, please dm me. There has to be some way we can show her that we haven’t forgotten about the show or her. I can always make another post if there’s enough interest to spread the word

[alpaca-clouds]

Understanding Individualism vs Collectivism

Making that post about individualism and capitalism yesterday, I got some questions, that showed me the same problem as the person I was talking about had: A lot of people do actually not know what individualism and collectivism mean. So, let me try to explain.

I had kinda hoped that Abigail from Philosophy Tube might have made a video on this, but no such luck. So, I guess I have to try and explain it, even though I mostly know it from sociology, rather from the philosophic origins where it comes from.

Basically, both concepts originate with socialist philosophy in the early 19th century, which correctly identified the early capitalist society as individualist and saw the dangers coming with it. It argued that an individualist society will be harmful on a societal level, because the society at large would always focus on the self, rather than the other. Capitalist philosophy however picked this up was like: “Yeah, awesome, right?” And especially in the 20th century they really started to run with it, realizing that they could use it to make people into better consumers.

Now, individualism does not mean “a sense of self”. This is not connected to it. You will still have a sense of self in a collectivist society and nobody says that you shouldn’t have. Rather it means that the focus of everyone should be on the individual. Both themselves – but also the individual actors in society. It is as such not a surprise that the idea of “Great Man Theory” came up and started to thrive during early capitalism in the 19th century.

So, if individualism does not mean “a sense of self”, what does it mean?

I would argue there are two aspects to it. Once the aforementioned tendency to put the individual above the society and apart from it, but also to create and sell a personal philosophy that people are defined by their differences from others, rather than what they have in common. It tells people that they are all so very different from everyone else, which is a useful political tool for capitalism to fight collective actions such as unions, but also collective action for things like environmental protection. In the same vein it is used to keep people riled up against one another within society, as they focus on their differences, rather than what they have in common.

The most anarchistic professor I had at university put it very well: “If you as a worker talk to a factory worker from Bangladesh, you will find you have a lot in common. In fact you will always have more in common with this other worker rather than any billionaire there is.”

Which brings me to the other aspect that individualism is about: It sells you an individualistic dream. Which is why capitalism focuses so much on those rags to riches stories (that tend to be lies most of the time). “See, this millionaire started out his business in daddy’s garage. So you can also become a billionaire if you have the right idea.” Fellow leftist might know the saying: “You are just one bad day away from homelessness, but you will never be a billionaire.” Which is basically the counter argument to this.

See, capitalism tries to convince you, that “I am the better system, because in me you could become a billionaire,” to sell you not only on your own exploitation, but the exploitation of the masses.

And more than that, capitalism also has realized that it can use individualism to make you a better consumer. I alluded to this a bit further up. But the long and short of it is, that capitalism pushes this idea of “you are, what you consume”. Your individuality is defined by the things you spent money on. Maybe by you having the most expensive things, but also by you having maybe the weirdest things or something. You know, the “not like the other girls” girl will probably spend as much, if not more on the things that make her special, as “the other girls”.

This also goes into the whole idea of greenwashing, pinkwashing and rainbow capitalism. All this is about getting you to consume something to gain some sort of individual aspect from it. Basically, through buying the “green” stuff, you are a better consumer.

Ironically this also goes into the entire anti-shipping discourse, which basically also says that your goodness as a person is defined by the things you consume.

Capitalism is selling you your identity. Your individual identity.

But sadly this is an idea very, very deeply engrained into the heads of most who have grown up in capitalism. Because it is everywhere in media. Sure, there is some media that calls it out, but most of it actually peddles the idea of the individual.

Because this is the second aspect at the core of individualism: The myths that only individuals can change something, rather than a collective. Which is what I call out so often when I am talking about the entire punk-genre stuff.

Even though it is less punk, let me take Star Wars as an example, because it is an amazing example of this. Especially the original trilogy, in which the Rebellion battles the Empire. However, the evil Empire is not defeated because the Rebellion manages to somehow outwit or outmaneuvre the Empire. Or because maybe the collective of the workers in the Empire turn against it. Rather it gets defeated because Luke, the individual, turns Darth Vater, an individual, and defeats the Emperor, the individual. Which goes back to this idea of the “great man”. It is those unique individuals who will save the world, rather than collective action.

This idea of some individuals being the ones to save the world, rather than we – the people – as a group and ourselves, is used to keep the people pacified under capitalism. They are waiting for “a good billionaire” to solve climate change, homelessness and all the other problems for us, rather than getting active themselves. They keep telling themselves: “Hey, under capitalism everyone can be a billionaire, including myself, and also my life isn’t that bad right now. So who cares that under socialism/communism everyone could be lifted up?”

Look, folks. I am saying this lovingly. But you are not as much of an individual as you think. You are your own person, but you are not unique. In fact, if you talk to a random person on the street – no matter who they are – and you and them are not instantly judging each other for one reason or another, you will find that you have a lot more in common than you think. Capitalist individualism just taught you to not see this, because your empathy can be its undoing.

[emry-stars-art]

What was Abrams favorite thing that Andrew gave him during his courting attempts?

Okay I’ve been sitting on this one because I was trying to give it my best answer and like. I still don’t know lol

I know that people in the replies and tags are going to have incredible answers as well so I want this to be more of a “here’s a collection of things he likes the most” and I get to start so here’s my take:

It’s a book. I hear your valid confusion but LISTEN. In the stretch before Abram finally realizes what’s been going on with the gifts/etc, Andrew gives Abram a book - could be poetry, could be a romance story, idk - with a ribbon just barely peeking out of one page. Abram, obviously, doesn’t think much of it and he’s never been big on reading (I don’t know why I never have Neil liking to read lol is that canon) so he keeps the book on his dresser or something like “I’ll get around to it if he insists”

And then after Abram actually, clearly says he can accept Andrew’s advances, Andrew remembers about it and realizes Abram must not have ever opened the book because he would have figured this all out before now if he had

He asks him about it, if he ever read it, and Abram’s like “…no”

So Andrew tells him to. Later, when Abram’s back in his room, he picks up the book and checks out the first page, and it’s something pretty obviously unimportant or unrelated. And the next page. Eventually he thinks to check the ribbon; he flips to the pages and somewhere on them a quote is underlined in steady deep blue ink:

My glances through the eyes of friendship grow more brief by the day. You remain in the kindest, softest embrace of my heart, but now I find myself watching, hopeful, and friends do not look at friends the way I sometimes look at you.

Stunned, in a word.

But this is something he can figure out. This isn’t flowers - they’re lovely but die so quickly, and Abram doesn’t know the language of them or which ones Andrew would like. It isn’t meals shared, because that’s too common by now. It isn’t direct words or actions of affection because those are far too awkward for someone with so little experience with them. But Abram looks at this book, sees exactly what to do with it, and he knows certainly that this is a way the prince wouldn’t mind communicating because he was the first to do it. Abram doesn’t even have to be around when Andrew reads it.

So Abram spends the next several days scanning the book when he has time, finding many quotes he could perhaps imagine returning, finding a few he keeps marked just in case. Then he finds one that he doesn’t even bother marking with a scrap paper, he immediately picks up his pen and underlines it.

I look at the moon and she has your face: the brightest thing in my sky, the most beautiful, and so, so far away.

(And @jtl-fics had the sweetest idea of Abram pressing and keeping the flowers from the bouquet Andrew gets him in this post; and that he uses some to make bookmarks probably because he knows how much the prince likes books. He would definitely use one of those bookmarks to mark the page he underlined rather than the scrap ribbon 🥰)

Anyway the next time Abram sees the prince he wordlessly hands him back the book. Andrew sees the new mark but doesn’t try to open it yet (which relieves Abram more than he’ll admit), just keeping it under his arm until he has somewhere to put it. But it doesn’t take him near as long to find another quote, since he tends to get distracted reading the context or surrounding passages; he underlines the very next sentence and gets the book back to Abram the next morning. Understanding the risk of Abram’s misunderstanding and completely willing to explain himself in plain terms when Abram asks. Still with the pressed flower bookmark.

To have you near enough to touch should surely destroy me.

When Abram opens it later he first sees that the pages look very familiar - those passages look very familiar - that quote is certainly familiar. And he gets very worried very quickly. Maybe Andrew didn’t like that one, maybe Abram had chosen wrong and he didn’t know how to do this as well as he’d thought. But he doesn’t close it fast enough not to finally, mercifully read on and realize that some of the ink on the page is not his own black ink. After it, dark enough to almost be black in the wrong light, is Andrew’s dark blue.

But after reading Andrew’s quote he does in fact close the book quickly, sitting back and just staring, mostly because he’d surprised himself; he won’t know Andrew’s intention for certain until he asks, but this time - likely for the first time - Abram looks at the word destroy and doesn’t immediately think of the harm he’s done. (Andrew’s new, unfamiliar way with words had to work it’s way into Abram’s understanding eventually.)

They go on as long as there’s still quotes they like in the book, and only once does Andrew get frustrated that Abram stole one of his before he could get around to using it.

Anyway thank you for the sweet ask, here’s a quick sketch of Andrew reading to Abram in the library

[tspud-whiteboard]

[Full Previews, Final Files and Extras can be found on GoogleDrive!] !!! THE DEADLINE HAS ARRIVED !!! (End of June it was) I am currently working on putting together the final files, but as this might take a while, YOU CAN STILL KEEP SENDING ME YOUR FELLAS! Once I’ve prepared the actual, finished, fullsize versions, this pinned post will unpin itself and I’ll put a different one here, with the final previews, the download links and some information what the future may hold... maybe I’ll do a Season Two if the interest is there. But we’ll have to see about that. For now, [SUBMIT MORE] like the wind while you still can! Hello, hello! Welcome to The Stanley Parable Ultra Deluxe Whiteboard Collaboration (a just-for-fun fan project)! I’m assuming that you found your way here because you’re well aware what The Stanley Parable is, and that you are curious to know what a Whiteboard Collaboration might be about!

Let me cut straight to the case then. It all started in 2023 - the 27th of April, to be precise - which just so happened to be the One Year Anniversary for the release of The Stanley Parable Ultra Deluxe on Steam and consoles, along with the historically very important and internationally renowned - or at the very least grudgingly accepted - 4/27: STANLEY DAY!

To celebrate the occasion, and only one day too late on the 28th, an idea came forth to put together a Whiteboard, containing all those Stanleys by all the fan artists out there (all credited, of course!), a worthy tribute to the Man of the Hour! And as you can see... we’ve already got quite a few collected!

But why stop there? Since plenty of people also came up with their own Narrator designs, and there’s a good few Timekeeper-Settings-432s and Curators, and plenty of other characters (defining the term loosely here), we might as well give them all their own little space to look absolutely dashing next to each other! Imagine, all those different designs, united in one glorious collection!

My point being... I’d love to see yours in there as well.

So... how can you join in?

The gist can be found up there in the first image, but let me also put it into text form down here, with some extra information:

[Submit] your Stanley, Narrator, 432 or Curator mugshot (or all of them at the same time!). You have [some other canon TSP favorite]? Go ahead, submit ‘em, too! We’ll find a spot. The format of the picture needs to be 300px (width) x 400px (height) to fit with the others. I can resize and cut them into shape if needed, but it’ll be easier on all of us if I don’t have to do that. All pictures will have a small white frame added by me afterwards, to give them that authentic printout flair.

Should the [Submit] button not work for you (I triple-checked and it works for me, but then who knows what this thing does while I’m not looking), sending your artworks through PM or tell me where you posted them is fine as well!

AUs and all art styles are fine! Please only submit one picture per character (if you have more than one design, maybe pick your favorite, or elegantly squeeze them into one picture. If you absolutely cannot decide, sending two pictures per character is okay, but I’d like to cap it there to give everyone equal amounts of space.

Must be Safe For Work!

This is also very important: Tell me how to credit you! Your name will go under your artwork, I do have to put something there. I’ll likely default to your username if I have nothing else to go by, but it’s best if you directly tell me, right there in your submission.

I will publish your submission(s) on here as soon as I’ve added it to the queue, so you’ll know it went through okay, and so you can show it around to others if you wish! (I can’t do that with PMs, of course.)

THE DEADLINE: Please try to submit your artworks before the End of June! Yes, 2023. This month. In this year. There’s a chance I’ll change this if a sudden influx of new entries rolls in, but as of now it looks like it’s a good time to start wrapping this up. I want my life back and all. ...But prove me wrong, why don’tcha? Why not tell your favorite TSP artists that they NEED TO BE ON THIS THING? NEED TO! WE CRAVE THEM, PRECIOUS. ...Sorry, got carried away there.

I give updates regularily. Previews of the latest Whiteboard statuses, questions that need answering, sometimes I might just add some nonsense rambles, all inclusive, for free.

The FINAL files, whenever they’re ready, will be 8000x4000px in size each and are mostly a much bigger version of the previews, with maybe a few small changes for the aesthetics.That’s quite massive. Humongous. It’s really impressive to browse all those artworks next to each other at that size. Here’s the [Google Drive] link, for all to download from and share around. So far, you can always find the latest Previews and a bunch of random Extras there, along with the first fullsize Stanley board as a test. Please do make suggestions if there’s better options, or if you can’t drive the Google.

I also post on Twitter and the Crows Crows Crows Discord server (fanart channel). If either of those are more comfortable options for you, or if you know someone on there who might also be interested in joining this collaboration, maybe poke me so I can give you directions. Or you might be able to find it yourself, I’m not actively hiding them away. Not even passively.

I think that’s all for now! If you have questions, suggestions, reservations, my Asks should be open. Looking forward to hopefully a lot more additions to the Whiteboards, there’s quite a few of you guys I’d loooove to see on there!

[yuyu1024]

Darling

Pairings: Seonghwa × y/n

Genre/tags: friends and more

Warning: 🔞🔞 smut/angst, cursing, sensual touching/making out, needy/clingy, Pet name, semi public, bj [lmk if i miss anything]

Words: 1.2k

Disclaimer:

- this story is just made up

- english is not my first language, please be nice 😊

Note: likes and reblogs much appreciated ⭐️

Check pinned post for more✨️

****

Half asleep, you wake up early in the morning to force yourself to jog. You've been slacking with it for the past month already. School have really messed up your routine.

Before you go and get ready to wash your face up, you decided to go down the kitchen first to grab a glass or water and prepare the tumbler you will be carrying for the run.

It's still a bit dark and again, half asleep, that you didn't find it weird that when you entered the kitchen area, the lampshade near the dining table is on. So when a deep ass voice started speaking behind you, you almost dropped down on the floor and faint.

"Fuck!" You gasp as you finally see it was Seonghwa. "You scared the shit out of me." Your hands on your chest and trying to collect yourself

"I didn't mean to..." he say then leans his lower back on the island counter top. "You're up early." His arms crossed over his chest.

"I'm going for a run... need to release some stress..." you say as you open the fridge and grab a bottle of water. "You?"

"I'm horny." He spat, making you almost choke on the water your drinking

You wipe your mouth. "W-what did you say?!?"

He puts his index finger over his plump, rosy lips. "Sshh... they are still asleep."

He is pertaining to your brother, Wooyoung, and the other boys. Some is sleeping up stairs in Wooyoung's room while Yunho and probably San is sleeping in the guestroom downstairs since they were up all night playing video games.

It's the beginning of summer so they are all in your house, having some boys slumber party. And they will be here for a few more days.

"You guys drank a lot last night... why are you awake now?"

"Again....as I said..." he stands up straight and lips curved in a small smile. "I'm horny... if you don't get that... It means I want sex... I want to fuck... I want..." he's moving closer and closer to you until your back touches the fridge. "I want to eat you..."

Your bodies are close to each other that you could actually feel his hardness through his pajamas and yours.

"W-why... me?"

"C'mon darling..." he leans down to whisper, "you know why... you've been teasing me since yesterday..."

You blush at the thought. Yes. You actually did. Not gonna lie, maybe it's because you had a few drinks too but not to the point your drunk. It just became liquid courage for you.

You've been crushing on him for more than a year now. He's been friends with your brother for so long. But you have no idea where this crush actually began. You thought it was just nothing until it got solidified more than a year ago.

How can you not like Seonghwa? He's sweet, kind, caring, passionate and such a good friend and person in general. Plus he's good looking and smart. And probably, one thing you like about him too is his naughty side.

But this KIND of naughty, is new to you.

"Wearing a a fitted top and those tiny shorts of yours?" He tugs your hair behind your ear before he takes you by your chin and make you look at him. "And when we were playing games... you make sure I get to have a good view of your ass and then brushing your chest onto my arm purposely..." he leans in again, lips close to your ear. "Just thinking about it makes me hard and ready to burry my d!ck in your pu$sy."

Oh shit. Your knees weakened a little. He sound so fucking sexy.

"What do you say? Darling... should we try... if you could take my d!ck well?"

His eyes are burning. He's different from the Seonghwa you see often. This is intense. In a good way.

"Ahm..." your breathing is all over the place as his hands begins to roam around your body.

"Give me your consent, darling." He pushes his pelvis to you more. His fucking hard as rock. "I've been wanting to fuck you since last night... but the boys are night owls and I can't find the timing to pull you out of your bed."

You are shaking and excited at the same time.

"What do you want to do?"

He smirks devilishly. "I want to fuck that beautiful mouth of yours first... would you like to try?"

You suddenly got brave and cup his bulge. "Feed me." You tease before you tip toe and go for a kiss.

His eyes widens after the cute peck you gave him but then the warmth in his eyes changes to something dark.

"Go down on your knees." He orders

Your mouth goes dry. This is your first time doing something like this. You've dated a few boys but didn't got to this. Seonghwa is a man and you're not a little girl anymore too. Making out is just basic. This is more than basic.

Slowly pulling down his pajama pants down, you almost choked on nothing as you see it clearly and close up. The length. The veins. The redness. The leaking tip.

"Fuck." You hiss as you grab him using both hands. "Wow..." You quietly move forward and begin to taste him.

You tongue run from the bottom to the tip. Feeling those edges that are so freaking beautiful that makes you wonder how it will feel if he puts it inside of you.

"Ugh... ah... that's it... ahhh...holy shit..." Seonghwa is moaning, nonstop as you let your tongue play around his length. "Fuck! darling, I never knew... you'd be this..." he pauses as he felt the warmth of your mouth. "Ohhh yes..."

You bop your head, sucking and licking every bits of him making him crazy. You're making sure he'll be wanting more from you or if not, will never forget the service you've given him.

"Y/n!" He cries. He puts his hands on the fridge for support. "Damn it!"

He pulls you up from your knees and start to make out with you.

"Fuck!" He looks at you, eye to eye. "You're not wearing a bra?" His hand is on your right boob, squeezing. He could feel how turned on you are under the shirt you are wearing. The tip is very hard and pointy. "8 guys... 7... less Woo...in this house and you're not wearing... a fucking bra? Do you know how dangerous this is?"

You smile putting your arms around his neck. "Do you want me to put on a bra or you'd want to taste it?"

A wide devilish grin spread across his lips. "You one naughty little princess..." he licks his lower lips and grinds his exposed length to your still covered core. "You'd regret turning me on even more... coz' darling... I'd bet you can not go jogging after I'm finished with you."

"Give it a go then..." you glance at the wall clock in the kitchen. "We have less than a hour before sunrise... before my parents and the rest of the boys wake up..."

He growls at your challenge. "Alright then..." he adjusts your positions and making you face the countertop. "Bend over..." he orders "and make sure to keep quiet..."

[midnightsun-if]

I’ve gotten a couple more asks in my inbox since the previous one last night that caused everything— I hesitate to call any of this discourse because I don’t want to sound dramatic— but I’d like to make this all-in-one post, that’ll be going in the FAQ, to settle this. Hopefully, I won’t get too harsh, and I apologize in advance if I do, or if I sound angry/annoyed, I’m just trying to stand firm, as I’ve previously mentioned, when it comes to this topic.

I’ll put the entirety of this underneath the cut— as I don’t wish to subject people who don’t wish to read it to the long post.

(I’ve shared screenshots beneath the cut… So, warning to anyone who may not like to see those when regarding this topic.)

I’d like to begin this by stating that I’m only annoyed, or somewhat vexed rather, with the ones that actually sent me these asks— I’m well aware a good majority of them are trolls, at least I hope, but I still felt like this would be a good time to simply collect them, make a one-and-done post, and then (hopefully) move on from this subject. As I’m, and I’m sure all of you, are tired of this topic— especially since it seems like a fairly cut and dry one to understand in the grand scheme of things.

Now I’d also like to say if you’d like to send me questions about expanding on Scarlett and/or Koda’s sexuality— what it means to them, why I decided to go that route, etc— you absolutely can! I’m more than happy answering them (though I may not be able to answer everything given spoilers). I’m not barring anyone from sending me anything, not that I truly could as free will doesn’t work like that, but I do hope this makes at least a couple people get the answers they need before sending in something. (And even if you do and need something explained a bit more? That’s completely fine!)

Onto the more gritty stuff…

Scarlett, and I’m mainly going to be mentioning her as this has been directed solely at her, but it also applies to Koda as well, is not a character simply for you all to romance, to have sex with, to be arm candy, etc. I’m well aware that’s not how the majority of people view her, but I thought I’d specify that regardless. She’s a character because of her own impact within the world, because of her own nuances, because of who she is… She works just as well as an RO as she does anything else. Am I excited about exploring her romance route? Absolutely. But, I’m even more excited about exploring Scarlett herself— backstory, personality, motivations, etc.

At the end of the day?

She’s Scarlett first before she’s the MCs anything.

Below are a couple of asks that I’ve received on this topic (older):

I saved these when I first got them because I was truly baffled by them and wanted to show my friend to see if I should do anything about it (just decided to delete them)…

Again, I’m aware these are more than likely nothing more than trolls, but I’ve gotten at least a dozen of asks ranging around this topic, that I’ve deleted because I didn’t think it’d become this much of an issue that I’d have to address in this manner, and I’d like to say to anyone that may think you can do this: No, you can’t.

Scarlett is a lesbian. I get that may disappoint some people, but there are seven other characters to choose from when it comes to romance. As I’ve mentioned before— Scarlett wouldn’t be Scarlett anymore if I decided to just make her romanceable for everyone. At that point there would’ve been no point to change her from the original character I had designed to fill her “slot” in the RO Cast.

Again, this isn’t everyone and I bet this isn’t even the vast majority of the individuals that are actually disappointed by Scarlett not being for everyone.

As for making Koda for F!MCs instead? Why would I do that? Barring the fact that he’s gay? Why do your potential problems with not being able to romance Scarlett suddenly outweigh the problems that F!MCs would go through by suddenly having that option torn away? It’s gross to even suggest doing something like that.

Below is one of the most recent asks that I’ve screenshotted to showcase what I mean in general:

I’m aware that I’d probably get some more readers if Scarlett would be accessible to everyone, but I truly don’t get this notion that Scarlett is somehow the supreme RO above all the others. I adore her, adore her route and character, but the others offer things too! They have their own special nuances that Scarlett doesn’t (just like it’s the same for her too). Not even going to comment on the interesting RO comment, as I feel like that’s intentional baiting (more so than the rest of this message).

I also wouldn’t want to cheapen my own characters, as well as the experiences you all can get with them, for more attention— I’m happy with the readers that I have right now. If I get more? Great! If I don’t? That’s also completely fine too. Because, at the end of the day, I know that I’m making the story and characters that I know I’ll enjoy making and that you all would enjoy reading.

Why not just let them?

Probably because Scarlett’s sexuality actually means something? More than simply keeping her from all of you? Like a lot of individuals seem to assume (a lot referring to the ones that sent these types of asks in)… Again, Scarlett isn’t a character just for you to get your rocks off. If you can’t respect that, how the hell would you ever actually respect her? And if you can’t even garner that basic amount, why would I ever let you romance her? (Not that I’d ever change my mind. Scarlett is staying exactly as she’s meant to be.)

I apologize if I’ve turned off readers from Midnight Sun because of this post, but I’ve been wanting to get this off my chest as this all started building up. I truly do appreciate all of you— and I can sympathize with the people that get a bit disappointed at finding out Scarlett isn’t for them: I.E. me with Miranda Lawson— but that doesn’t mean I’m going to change an integral part of who Scarlett is, pretty much taking out a chunk of what makes her Scarlett to begin with…

I’m sorry if I come off as overly harsh in this, but I hope I’ve been able to make my points firm and clear. Scarlett, and Koda, are staying as they’re designed right now— nothing, and no one, is going to change that.

Thank you for taking the time to read this.

[ssuperficialspacecadett]

Friday Fight Night

Chapter Four of the Through the Scope series | Chapter Five

Rating: Mature

Word Count: 3.4K

Chapter Overview: You help Benny and the guys get ready for FFN.

Notes: this chapter is just a bit shorter than what i usually like to post, but i didn't have a lot of time to write this week & i'm actually content with where i ended it ! sometimes u just have to stop a little short so u don't just start typing random shit to meet a bullshit word count u give urself u know? i updated the tag list so if i missed u PLZ LET ME KNOW & i will add u asap !! well as usual...my asks are always open & happy reading <3

*no use of y/n & female presenting reader*

— — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — —

Why is this so difficult? It's just like every other day at work, except for the fact that it's not. You have been standing in front of your closet for a good 10 minutes now just looking at your clothes. Suddenly nothing seems good enough to wear. Maybe something would be good enough if you knew how to dress for a fight. Should you wear workout gear? No, you weren’t the one fighting. Should you wear a tank top and a tennis skirt? Probably not if it gets as rowdy as Benny says it will. 

“Just pick a fucking outfit, you idiot.” You chastise. 

After yet another once over of your closet you pick out a worn, white t-shirt with an image of Speed Racer on it. It had definitely seen its glory days years ago when you were still in college. If it worked then, it should work now. You take it off its hanger, along with some jeans, and put it all on. You’re tying your shoes when your phone chimes next to you. 

???: Hey, we will be getting to the gym around closing time. Are you staying to help Benny set up? 

???: Oh, this is Frankie BTW

Seeing his name on your screen makes your chest tighten with excitement. You obviously gave him your number so he could text you, but now it feels so real. Something about Frankie texting ‘BTW’ makes you giggle to yourself as you sit on the floor.

You: Yes, I figured I would make myself useful. No point in going home since the fights start at 10:00 P.M. and I might lose my parking spot.

You have to set your phone down before you overthink the most basic text you have ever sent in your life. Just for good measure, you leave it on your bed while you go into the bathroom. Despite your best efforts to remain nonchalant about the whole situation, you find yourself putting on a little more makeup than usual. By the time you have wrapped up and returned to your room an unread text is waiting for you. 

Frankie: Good thinking. See you tonight then.

The rest of your morning has a bit more pep in it than before.

***

Your day at the gym passes by as usual. The only two exceptions were a truck load of last minute Friday Fight Night tickets sales and then compliments on how the gym was smelling. You made a mental note to smack Benny upside the head for throwing such a temper tantrum about it. In between customers you found yourself checking your phone more than you regularly do. You told yourself that it was just because you were excited about the fights and were counting down the minutes and not because you were hoping to receive another text from Frankie. Unfortunately, lying to yourself never really works out. 

In an effort to keep yourself occupied, you answer emails from people that are applying for a gym membership, make laps around the gym to see if you need to replace any of the wipes used to clean the machines, and collect all of the dirty towels for a load of laundry. Much to your dismay, these tasks don’t take very long to complete. By 3:30 P.M. you reluctantly slink back to the front desk where the single most unwanted guest is waiting. 

“There she is! My favorite receptionist! I’m still interested in knowing your name, darlin’.” 

“Good afternoon, Brunson.” You plop yourself down in your chair and pull up the schedule on the computer. “Just working out today? I don’t see that you’re with Benny.”

“You caught me. I want to make sure that I’m in good shape when I fight in a few weeks time.” 

For a few blissful seconds you allow yourself to indulge in the idea of Brunson getting clocked, hard, right in the jaw. 

“Well, enjoy yourself.” You scan his card quickly in an attempt to move him on his way.

“I always do so when you’re here.” He clicks his tongue at you while he walks past your desk. 

“God, he’s insufferable.” You mumble to yourself.

It’s 4:00 P.M. when Benny finally ventures up to the front lobby with you.

“Where have you been? I feel like I haven’t seen you all day, man.”

“Because you haven’t,” He covers his face with his hands and whines into them before coming back up for air. “At first I couldn’t find where the white board I used to write out the fightin’ pairs was. Then there was somethin’ wrong with the beer delivery and they kept me out back for fuckin’ ever. That isn’t even coverin’ all the one on one sessions I've had today or the ones I’m still goin’ to have.”

It’s breaking your heart to see how stressed out he’s getting with all of the things he has to juggle today. You get out of your chair, walk over to him, and rub on his shoulder comfortingly. 

“It’s going to be alright, Benny. I’m staying after work to help you set up and Frankie told me that the guys are coming to help around closing too. You won't be in this alone for much longer.”

He places both of his hands on his hips and exhales deeply.

“Thank you,” You can see the earnestness in his eyes. “I really appreciate it.”

“Of course. That’s what friends are for, right?”

He smiles down at you from his 6’2 frame and before you can move he pulls you in for a deadly tight hug.

“Benny!” You can’t stop laughing. “Let me go this fucking instant!”

“Friends like hugs from other friends, right?” He yells over your incessant protesting. 

“I’m going to kill you, you know that?!” Your tone of voice doesn’t even sound remotely serious. 

Eventually you get him to unlatch himself from you so the two of you can finish up the work day in order to prepare for this evening.

***

You stand back proudly and admire all of your handiwork. Benny put you in charge of setting up the beer table, so set up the beer table you did. You designed a poster to hang on the wall above the table so people would be able to clearly see their options and their respective prices. You set a long, metal tub in the center of the table and filled it halfway with ice. Then you made a little arrangement out of the beer and poured the last half of the ice on it to keep it cold. The cash box was fully stocked and set to the side. All in all, you did a pretty good job. Thankfully, one of Benny’s regulars volunteered to work it this evening.

“All done over here!” You call over to Benny. “How’s the sign coming?”

You watch in horror as he stands up to reveal a barely legible fighting roster. He must have seen your face flounder when you looked at it because he just tosses the dry erase marker over to you and crosses his arms. 

“Oh, Benny I-”

“I know it looks bad. I’ve never had a knack for all this creative shit.”

You squeeze his hand as you pass him while heading to the white board. He slides over the roster that has been printed on paper for you to use as your guide. You’re so engrossed with your new task that you don’t notice when the guys come in around 8:30 P.M..

“You sure are givin’ Benny a run for his money this evenin’. The place hasn’t looked this put together in…well ever.” That sugary, sweet southern drawl could only belong to one man. 

“Thank you, Will!” You toss over your shoulder.

“Aw screw you, dude. Maybe it would have been if y’all had gotten here when y’all said you would.” Benny notes.

“Blame Fish.” Pope snickers. “He couldn’t find the perfect outfit.” 

That got your interest peaked. You turn around to look at what Frankie is wearing. Regular work boots, soft looking denim jeans, a black undershirt, a worn blue button up with the top few buttons left undone, and finally his cap- oh god he’s looking at you. If you had been a smarter woman, you would have noticed that two thirds of the group standing behind you were looking at your sign. That damned one third of the group was watching you trail your way up his whole body. He’s like an oak; completely unwavering as you take him in. 

“Well, I like it. ” You squeak out as you turn your attention back to the roster. “Now why don’t you guys go make yourselves useful and help Benny?”

You hear a unified ‘yes ma’am’ come from behind you followed by the scattering of three pairs of feet. There truly isn't anything more sexy than men who can follow orders.

All five of y’all work tirelessly for the next hour to get everything finished before the doors open to the public. When you cross off the last item on your to-do list, you decide that you have earned a drink. You sneak over to the beer table and open one of the coolers that you set up behind it that contains the excess bottles. Much to your dismay, the bottle caps don't twist off like you originally thought. You’re on your knees looking around in the extra bags and praying that Benny had the foresight to get a bottle opener when Frankie walks up next to you. 

“Lose something?”

“Just my dignity trying to locate the stupid fucking bottle opener.”

He laughs jovially as he extends his hand to help you up. You take it and sheepishly hand him your bottle when he motions for it. The two of you walk around to the front of the table and you watch as he easily takes out his keys and pops the cap open with a bottle opener he had attached to them. You notice that instead of tossing the cap in the trash he places it back in his pocket along with his keys. Right when he starts to hand the drink back to you he pulls it back towards him. 

“Hey! What gives?”

“I have to test it to make sure it isn’t poisonous or something.”

“Oh my god, you dick.” You lean back on the table behind you.

“You won’t be saying that when I save your life.” He takes a small sip and passes it over to you. “Nope. It’s not poison. You’re in the clear.”

Now it’s your turn. You turn to look out at the gym while you take a drink of your well deserved reward. 

“Wait,” You look over at Frankie. “What if it's a slow acting poison and now we are both infected? I guess you have to stay here and finish this with me so we can go out together.”

He leisurely reclines next to you on the table and takes the bottle in his hand when you offer it to him. “That's some pretty sound logic. I can’t argue with that.”

You try to stop yourself, but you watch as he brings the frosty glass to his pouty lips. They look more pink than usual against the dark color of the bottle. His hands make the beer bottle look so much smaller than it really is. Your eyes wander to that nose you’re so fond of. God, what would it feel like on your clit as he ate his fill of you? Now that you’re closer to him you’re able to see the gray that's intricately woven into his beard and hair. Would it tickle the inside of your thighs when he buried his face in your pussy? Feelings you haven’t had for a man in a long time rock through your body the further you sink into your fantasy. Drifting even further, his adam’s apple bobs as he swallows the chilled liquid. You want to decorate the sensitive skin with blossoming purple marks. 

“What?” He’s looking at you now. “Do I have something on my face?”

“No,” You say almost breathlessly. “I just wanted to make sure you didn’t hog it all.”

“I would never.” The low baritone of his voice reverberates through you. 

Benny, thankfully, yells from across the gym at the both of y’all before you do something questionable. 

“Hey, lazy asses! It’s showtime!”

You and Frankie both let out a breath neither of y’all realized you were holding. He looks down at his watch and then faces his friend with a mild look of annoyance.

“It’s 9:30, man. It’s just the boxers and the ring girls coming in right now.”

You notice that Frankie’s body immediately tenses up after he says this. Confused, you look over at Benny who has eyes as bright as the sun and is making a beeline towards you. 

“I’m sorry.” Frankie whispers down to you. “I’m so sorry.”

“Benny? What are you-?”

“I have a proposition for you.” He says while gripping both sides of your arms. “Do you wanna hear it?”

“I don’t think I have a choice by the look of things.”

“Please be my ring girl.” He gasps.

“Oh my god.” You let your head roll back. “Benny, are you serious right now?”

“Don’t say no yet. Just think about it before you decide.” 

You roll your head over to face Frankie and raise your eyebrows. You’re met with a shrug that is just as innocent as his grin.

“Does this offer have an expiration date?” You inquire shifting your focus back to the man that currently has you in a vice grip. 

“Just think about it.” He pleads.

“Fine, but I’m pretty sure I’m gonna say n-”

“La-la-la! I can’t hear you! La-la-la!”

“Don’t you have fighters to go hype up in the locker room?” Frankie cuts in.

“Nothin’ I hate more than when you’re right, Fish. Catch y’all in between the matches!”

With one final ‘think about it’, he bounds off into the locker rooms. All you can do is laugh hysterically at what just transpired. Frankie probably thinks you have lost your mind with the way you are doubled over right now. 

“Hey let us in on the joke, why don’t you?” Pope sits next to you on the table. 

“I could use a good laugh as well.” Will adds blithely.

“What you two could use is a reality check.” you walk around the table and grab a beer for each of them. “God, I can’t believe him.”

You hand Will and Pope their drinks completely forgetting about taking the tops off. Fortunately, that didn’t stop them. Will snatches Pope’s beer out of his hand and positions the bottles where one has its cap resting just barely on the edge of the other's cap. Then he slams them down on his knee and Pope’s opens with ease. After he hands the open one off, he pops his own with a thick ring he’s wearing. 

“I’m thoroughly impressed, Will. What the hell was that?”

“You just gotta learn to make due sometimes.” 

Frankie and Pope both mutter ‘show-off’ under their breaths as Will explains to you the physics behind his little trick. 

“Okay, now back to what Benny was talking about.” You adjust your stance so you can better face the group. “Are y’all in on this? This ‘ring girl’ shit?”

“Can’t say it wouldn’t be fun though.” Pope prods his finger at you. 

“Oh, yes I can.” You say swatting at him.

“You know, Benny. Once he sets his mind to somethin’ he’s pretty determined to see it through.”

“That doesn’t even begin to answer my question, Will.” You groan as you take the beer from Frankie’s hand. 

The movements between y’all are so natural, so fluid that it feels like something you have been doing for years. You see Pope, almost in shock, watch you as you take a drink.

“Can I get some of that?”

“No way, man.” You shelter the bottle against your body. “Three is a crowd and you literally have an open one in your hand.”

“Will’s right,” Frankie reasons with you. “Benny is as one track minded as they come.”

“Tell him to get on another track then.”

“How about this?” Pope counters. “You go into the locker room with Benny and see what it takes to be a ring girl. Then and only then will he accept your answer of ‘no’ if that’s still what you want.”

“If that will get him off my case then that's fine with me.” 

You start to turn towards the locker room doors when a blue sleeved arm reaches over your shoulder and plucks the beer from you. 

“Hey, give that back!”

“I just want to make sure you don’t hog it all.” Frankie’s tone is thick with sarcasm.

“I would never.” You grin.

Pope waits until you have cleared the locker room doors before he whacks Frankie in the shoulder. Unfortunately, Frankie doesn’t see it coming because he is too busy hoping to catch one more glimpse of you.

“If that's how you act around women you think are ‘just cool’ then I’m terrified to see how you act around women you actually like.”

“The fuck was that for? And the fuck are you talking about, man?” He massages the spot where Pope smacked him. 

“Will, please tell me you aren’t as blind as he is?”

“Sorry, Fish. I see it too.”

“See what?”

“That you look like a goddamn catfish whenever you look at her! Eyes all big and mouth agape.”

“I do not.” Frankie mutters. 

“Come on.” Pope folds his arms across his chest. “You think she’s cute.”

“What are we in middle school? You’re being ridiculous. Will?” 

“I’ll be honest, I wanna know too.” He flashes that signature boyish Miller smile.

All Frankie can do is laugh nervously while he removes his cap and runs his fingers through his hair. He knows that he’s in the middle of a losing battle and that he’ll have to concede. They are going to be ecstatic that a woman other than Rochelle has caught his eye. Especially when it's a woman that meshes so naturally with their group. No, what’s stopping him is that a part of himself wants to keep it a secret. To have something that is just his. No prying eyes, no unwanted advice, no consequences, and no one else has to get hurt but him. As soon as the acknowledgement of his affection for you falls from his lips, it's real. As selfish as it sounds, he wants to keep you at arms length. He feels like everything he touches breaks and he doesn’t want you to become the next casualty. You wouldn’t want him if you knew the truth about the things he has done. But then you smile or laugh and he can feel himself falling deeper and deeper into his delusions of grandeur. 

“Well, if you don’t like her then maybe I’ll ask her out.”

“No, you won't because,” Frankie puts his cap back on. “I think she’s cute. Are y’all happy? I like her.”

“Atta boy, Fish!” Will cheers. 

“I knew it!” Pope says as he pulls Frankie in for a hug. “She’s a good one, man.”

“I know she is. I just don’t know if I’m going to do anything about it right now.”

Will’s hand comes to rest on his shoulder. “Why’s that?” 

“I don’t want to fuck it up. To drag her into the shit show that is my life. I don’t even know if she feels the same way either!”

The two other men nod in understanding. Frankie takes a sip of the drink he stole from you and sighs as he looks up at the ceiling. 

“All I know is…is that I like her.”

“Shh!” 

“Pope, you were the one that wanted to talk about this!”

“Shut the fuck up! She's coming!”

“Y’all ready? I’m going to open the doors for everyone!”

The three of them use the time it takes you to unlock the doors and arrive back in order to regroup from their previous conversation.

“Did you,” Will clears his throat. “Did you like the view back there? See a future in being Benny’s ring girl?”

“I like the view from right here, thank you very much.” 

“So,” Pope rubs his hands together. “Who ready to see some dudes get the shit beat out of them?”

— — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — —

{tag list: @cutesyscreenname @rsquared31 @smol-beb @bitchwitch1981 @avastrasposts @hoeslingz @saltybutteredtoast @javicstories @c-justhere @pimosworld @modernperplexity @beboldbebravethings @modernperplexity @mxtokko @moonliqhtszn @tanzthompson }