#would you look at that?! I’m still alive! First post in like three years...

[thecowardlycreative]

I’ve been rewatching My Country; The New Age so take a quick Han Hui Jae because she deserved so much more.

[sofmoth]

I Found My Place in This World (It’s in Your Wake)

here’s my entry for @beefrobeefcal’s september prompt!!! this is fairly out of my comfort zone so i do hope you all enjoy it! title is from 'she's the prettiest girl at the party and she can prove it with a solid right hook' by frank iero, work is not inspired by the song.

the photoshop is MYOB (mind your own business) mkay

also posted to AO3 by me (@sofmoth), link here.

divider created by @animatedglittergraphics-n-more

husband!joel miller x wife!reader, WC: 1.03k

TAGS: husband!joel, anniversary dinner, all the fluff, chubby!joel, marriage has caused joel to gain weight, soft!joel, no physical description is given of reader, reader uses an inhaler, joel is goofin, POV u become one with the couch, joel calls reader “sweetie,” joel jokingly asks if he’s fat, reader jokingly calls themself “delicate," fuck i love this man

It’s officially been one year since you tied the knot, one whole year of living with your husband full-time. Joel had been fairly insistent that you lived separately until you got married, despite the fact that you spent more nights with him than without during your engagement. You never really minded, he had a mortgage to pay on his house but was still more than willing to help you with your rent until the day came.

One year later, and marriage had been good to Joel. His mental health and financial stability had improved, and he seemed overall a happier person. The only drawback seemed to be the effect it had on his waistline. It was only a drawback according to your brother-in-law Tommy; you love the way Joel’s belly had softened over the last twelve months.

No longer was he forgetting to eat breakfast, packing himself a half-assed lunch to take to his job sites, nor was he attempting to pass off three-day-old pizza as a full dinner. If you could go back in time ten years, tell your younger self you have a husband you love cooking for, you would vomit on your own shoes. Being who you are now though, it’s a joy to make him a meal, fulfilling to see how happy it makes him that you’ve ensured he eats well in the early mornings and has proper lunches to keep him strong until dinner. The way he relaxes on the couch with you after, pulling you on top of him to cuddle, the wonderful healthy squish of his tummy between you a reminder to you both that love is not all in the way one looks.

He had been self-conscious at first, when he stepped on the scale and saw the number had increased. You very quickly put that worry to bed, assuring Joel every day that he was still the sexiest man alive. You told him how sexy he was irritatingly regularly, and then he started to believe it. He started walking around the house in his PJ pants with his shirt off again, you begging him to flex, him obliging. Joel’s belly and the weight he gained were the most physical and personal reminders of how much you loved him.

To celebrate this first full year of your marriage, you made a fabulous meal so you could stay in for the night and enjoy it together. Pot roast and potatoes, enough rolls to choke a horse, two or three glasses of wine. Joel is doing the dishes, you lay on the couch watching him across the room. He glances back at you, smiling, and you wave with your fingers. The wine has certainly hit you; you’re not drunk by any stretch, but you’re definitely more comfortable horizontal. You close your eyes, listening to the sink run for a few minutes before the last dish clinks in the drying rack and the water stops.

“Wow. My wife made such an amazing dinner, and I’m so tired from doing those dishes. I think I’d like to sit and rest.” You can hear the dry playfulness in his voice, eyes still closed.

“Boy oh boy, that couch looks comfy. I think I’ll have a seat riiiiight here.” Your eyes fly open, hand covering your mouth as you cackle at the feeling of him sitting on your shins.

“Joel! No, c’mon! If you’re gonna sit on me, at least sit on my thighs. I’m so delicate.” Joel rolls his eyes, smiles as he scoots up.

“You’re right, this cushion is way more comfortable. I think I could fall asleep here, matterfact I just might.”

You reach for him, pinching his side playfully. He does sit on your thighs for a few minutes, arms stretched across the back of the couch, head tilted back and eyes closed. The muscles in your legs finally begin to feel like TV static, and despite the fact that you’ve sobered up considerably it’s still not a particularly pleasant sensation.

“Oh shit, baby my legs are falling asleep. Bit’s over, I gotta move ‘em.” Joel looks down at you, mouth open in mock-offense.

“Is my wife calling me fat? On our one-year wedding anniversary, of all days? How dare you, I cannot believe this.”

Still, he does get up; long enough to lay his entire body on top of yours. He nuzzles into your neck, his beard scratching your skin softly. He sighs deeply, squeezes you in a hug as you rest your hand on his back. And then he raspberries you.

You squeal, laughing wildly as he begins laying a barrage of kisses to your neck and face. You laugh so hard you start struggling to pull in a full breath, and Joel jumps up quickly to get your inhaler out of your purse. You’re still laughing, now coughing and wheezing at the absurdity of the situation. He shakes the little plastic container thoroughly before uncapping it and handing it to you, tugging you upright before you press the canister and inhale.

He rubs your back as you hold your breath, exhaling slowly with you. He presses a kiss to your temple, taking the inhaler back and replacing it in your purse. As he sits back down he pulls you into his lap, cradling you against himself.

“I’m sorry sweetie, I got a little carried away. You feel okay?”

“Yeah, I’m good. It wasn’t full-blown, I was just getting too wound up. Thank you for getting it, though.”

“Of course. Don’t want my wife taking a trip to the emergency room, especially not on our special day. Here, lemme—”

He shifts so he’s laying on his back, holding you on his chest as always. He continues rubbing your back, occasionally kissing the top of your head.

“Hey, husband?”

“Yes, wife?”

“That joke you made about me calling you fat, it wouldn’t matter to me at all if you actually were.”

“I know, sweetie.”

You rub Joel’s shoulder gently with your thumb, feeling yourself growing tired from the steady rhythm and pressure of his hand on your back.

“You can go to sleep, we’ll be okay out here tonight.” You hum.

“Joel?”

“Yeah, sweetie?”

“I love you.”

“I love you, too.”

[the-daily-dreamer]

can u explain why u dislike lucerys so much?

because atleast from my pov he was a 7year old child who thought his brother was going to die and retaliated against someone older and stronger than him with a weapon he didn’t even bring

also the bullying he was following his older brother and only companion as well as his much older uncle, an authority figure.

yes he should have apologised, but when should he have? when he was being treated by the maesters for his broken nose? when aemonds mother said to have his eye cut out? when he returned half a decade later and his uncle’s hatred was already there AND his own dislike likely pushed by his family?

lucerys definitely should’ve made amends but there are a lot of factors in it so i don’t rlly see the dislike? idk i just wanna have it explained, no hate just curious (:

Just going to preemptively say that I understand this isn’t hate, so anon, please know that if I have any sort of aggravated tone in this answer it’s not against you. I’m just very passionate about this topic lol

Also this is a crazy long post. Sorry y’all.

“…he was a 7 year old child who thought his brother was going to die and retaliated against someone older and stronger than him with a weapon he didn’t even bring”

When it comes to the fight, I’m mad at all four children who ganged up on an innocent kid and started beating him mercilessly. People love to focus on the fact that Aemond might have done something with that rock, but they completely erase the context, which is that he was tackled to the ground and being punched by four people.

The real context is that Aemond was on defense in that fight. He didn’t seek anyone out. He didn’t start the argument. He didn’t throw the first blow. All Aemond did was fight back to protect himself and grabbed a makeshift weapon to ensure he doesn’t get beaten by four people at once. He was in survival mode and doing anything to keep himself protected.

When it comes down to Lucerys in that fight. He had no business running in and joining in the group beating of another child. It wasn’t his fight. I understand he’s a child, but most kids understand that beating up someone is a bad thing to do. Even at 7. I knew not to punch people at 7, and I can guarantee most others did too. Age can excuse a lot of things but mercilessly beating someone who is on the ground being beaten by three others? I don’t think so.

But let’s look at why Luc cuts his eye out. From your perspective it’s to “save his brother’s life”. But is that really the case? Let’s really take a look. During the fight, Aemond pushes all four kids off him while he is being beaten on the ground. Once gaining the upper hand, he grabs Luc and holds a rock over his head, and…talks. He threatens to kill them and calls them bastards, but he doesn’t actually do anything. In fact, when Luc says his “father” is alive and Aemond realizes Luc doesn’t know he’s a Strong, he lowers the rock. At that point Aemond is no longer a threat. His weapon is down, and he’s speaking relatively calmly. It’s only after Aemond calls Jace “Lord Strong” that the knife is drawn. The knife isn’t drawn for self-defense or to save Luc. It’s pulled for the fact that Aemond called the boys bastards.

From there Jace keeps attacking him with a knife. Aemond gets the better of him in the fight once again, and Jace is on the ground. Here’s where the “saving his life” comes in. Aemond stands over Jace with the rock in his hand raised high and….does nothing. Again. I counted, and Aemond stands there still for about 10 seconds doing absolutely nothing. He breathes deeply. He looks at Baela and Rhaena who look back in fear. But he does nothing. In those ten seconds Luc scrambles to grab the knife, exchanges a look with Jace, and then Jace throws sand in Aemond’s eyes and Luc leaps at him and slashes his eye out.

Now, personally, watching that scene I really didn’t get the feeling Aemond would do anything. Every time he gets the upper hand and will supposedly kill one of the kids with a rock, he stops. He lingers. He doesn’t deliver the blow. By the time Luc gets the knife Aemond has been still and not hit Jace at all for quite a bit of time. He waits long enough for Luc to get the knife and for both boys to silently agree on a tactic to hurt him.

This also begs the question. If Jace had enough time and space to grab sand in his fist and throw it at Aemond to temporarily blind him and get away, why the fuck didn’t he do that before?! We see that Aemond yells and is disoriented by the sand in his eyes. Jace could’ve easily thrown it and kicked aemond and gotten away and they could’ve ended the fight by running away. But instead he waited until his brother had a knife and they could stab him. These boys weren’t doing this in self-defense. It was a coordinated attack with the intention to stab Aemond with a knife. They wanted to stab him. We saw that with Jace pulling it out first.

That whole fight is not Jace and Luc fighting to survive. It’s Aemond fighting to survive. It’s not Luc jumping to save his brother. It’s Jace wanting to stab someone for calling him a bastard (he is), and both boys working together to hurt him. I genuinely believe that the long pauses Aemond took are proof enough that he had no intention of hurting actually killing them. I think it was more of an act of intimidation to show they should leave him alone. So I hold all four kids responsible for what happened to Aemond, but most especially Jace and Luc because while the girls stopped beating Aemond and left after he pushed them off. Jace and Luc kept going because they got angry at the title they were rightfully called, and teamed up to deal a blow that resulted in permanent damage and blinding one eye.

“also the bullying he was following his older brother and only companion as well as his much older uncle, an authority figure”

As I said earlier. I understand seven year olds are dumb as heck, and they don’t always know what is an is not ok. However. Just as I would think most seven year olds know beating someone is bad, most seven year olds know bullying is bad. Hurting people’s feelings isn’t ok. At seven, I knew bullying wasn’t ok. All the boys knew what they were doing was insulting and mean. That’s why they did it. They wanted to be hurtful to Aemond. Yes, Luc was following Aegon and Jace, but that doesn’t absolve the fact that he fully knew what they were doing was mean and found it funny like the others.

yes he should have apologised, but when should he have? when he was being treated by the maesters for his broken nose? when aemonds mother said to have his eye cut out? when he returned half a decade later and his uncle’s hatred was already there AND his own dislike likely pushed by his family?

We can agree he should have apologized, anon. But you seem to be under the impression of how Luc simply couldn’t apologize because of everyone else or the circumstances. You seem to be incorrectly putting the blame on Alicent and Aemond for why he didn’t apologize. Even thought Aemond is the victim.

But let’s see, when should Luc have apologized? “When he was being treated by the maesters for his broken nose”? Sure! Aemond had to answer interrogations by his father and calmed his mother down while having his eye socket sewed shut. I’m sure Luc could’ve apologized then. A broken nose is not nearly as awful and having an eye gouged out, and he seemed pretty ok at that point so yeah. He could’ve spoken up and said he was sorry.

“When Aemond’s mother said to have his eye cut out”? I’m sorry but this reeks of Alicent anti. There was plenty of time before and after Alicent had a literal mental breakdown for Luc to apologize. Why even blame or bring up Alicent? She has nothing to do with this. Luc’s responsibility to apologize is not dependent on anyone else. Least of all the woman in the room who is the only person who cares that Aemond is hurt.

“when he returned half a decade later and his uncle’s hatred was already there AND his own dislike likely pushed by his family”? Absolutely. I assume you’re talking about the dinner scene, and yes, Luc absolutely could have and should have apologized. Yes, Aemond’s anger was pretty much set because it had been a decade of no apology for literally being maimed. But a late apology is better than no apology. During that dinner, Alicent and Rhaenyra, two people who had two decades worth of resentment between them, were heartfelt and kind to one another. Luc could’ve easily toasted to Aemond. He could’ve lifted his glass and said “To my uncle. Long ago I did horrible things to him, and I’ve carried the burden of resentment and guilt all these years. I am truly sorry for the pain I’ve caused, and I hope that my heartfelt apology can be a new beginning for us” or something else sappy like that. Team black may or may not have solidified resentment in Luc against Aemond (about what I wouldn’t know because Aemond didn’t actually do anything wrong). But that doesn’t take away from the fact he should’ve apologized.

You seem to be pushing the idea that because Luc grew resentment because of his family against Aemond, he couldn’t apologize. But he very much could. He just didn’t want to. Because he didn’t care. He didn’t think he was wrong and didn’t feel he had to apologize.

The simple truth of the matter is that Luc didn’t apologize because he doesn’t feel remorse. It’s not because he was too injured to apologize at first. Or because Alicent was mean for five minutes. Or because his family solidified resentment. He didn’t apologize because he isn’t sorry. And that is best exemplified by the dinner scene. Like I said earlier he could’ve apologized. But instead, what did Luc do? He saw a pig and began to laugh at the cruel prank and bullying he did against Aemond. He still relished in the mean things he did as a child. There’s no remorse there, only smugness and sick enjoyment in his past cruelties. That is why I hate Lucerys so much. The burden of responsibility to apologize was on Luc, and there is no excuse for him not apologizing. He just wasn’t sorry, and that’s not on anyone but Luc for being…just not a good person.

TLDR: Luc has had a long pattern of being cruel and mean and never felt an ounce of guilt. You are right that there’s many factors, anon. But they don’t take away from the basic facts. Luc intentionally hurt Aemond’s feelings and found joy in it, Luc intentionally maimed Aemond with Jace (instead of opting for a less violent conclusion), and Luc never apologized and never felt remorse for his cruelty instead opting to continue to take pleasure in his negative acts.

[newtthetranswriter]

Delayed Mark

Word count: 5539

Paring: Choso x Gn! Reader

Summary: In a world with soulmates you were the only one born without a mark. After 25 years thinking you will never have a soulmate, your mark randomly appears. Only a few weeks later you find your soulmate during one of the worst curse attacks Jujutsu Sorcerers have seen since the Night parade of a hundred Demons.

Warnings: Spoilers for Choso’s character and history in general, slight spoilers for Kenjaku, Mentions of blood and death, if i missed anything let me know.

A/n: Hello people this has been in the works for a long time but finally got inspiration to finish it. The end might seem a bit rushed but I wanted to finally post it. So you aren’t surprised one satosugu is canon, Shoko x Haibara is real and you can fight me on it. Anyway I hope you enjoy and Remember to Hydrate or Diedrate, I’m looking at you @ness-iness . Also requests are open. MINORS AND AGELESS BLOGS DO NOT INTERACT

    I had to be the least lucky person alive. In a world where everyone has a mark on their body to tell them who their soulmate is, I was born without one. It's extremely rare for something like this to happen. No one knows why or how it happened. But when I was born it was evident that I was unmarked, destined to spend forever alone.

When I was younger it wasn't that bad because I didn't fully understand what it meant. Then when I reached middle school and all my friends started meeting their soulmates, I felt left out. My parents tried to tell me that 'maybe it will show up later' or that 'there is someone out there for you even if you don't have a mark.' They even went as far as to say I didn't need a soulmate to be happy. I wanted to believe them but in our world it can be hard, with happy soulmates everywhere you look.

    It became even more apparent when I entered highschool and transferred to Jujutsu Tech. Though the number of people around was small, it was clear that everyone had a soulmate. It felt like fate was rubbing it in my face that I was to be forever alone. And I accepted that I didn't need a soulmate to be happy. Even though I had accepted it, there were still people trying to tell me that having a soulmate was the best thing. I was growing tired of it, until I got to know two fellow sorcerers who had lost their soulmates and believed that even without them they can find a way to be happy.

    There's Saturo Gojo, a special grade sorcerer who's soulmate turned his back on sorcerers and set out to wipe out all non-sorcerers. During an attack on Tokyo and Kyoto, his soulmate was killed trying to attack the first years at Jujutsu Tech. Gojo viewed soulmates as pointless because even though he had one and lost him he was still able to be happy with his life. 

    Then there's Shoko, she was a third year at Jujutsu Tech when her soulmate was killed on a mission he was sent on. It hurt her greatly when she couldn't save him, especially because she is known for using reverse curse technique. She thought while soulmates could be an amazing thing, it was also painful when you lost them and thought maybe things would be better without them.

    Don't get me wrong, Gojo and Shoko both loved their soulmates and wouldn't change having met them. They just thought it could be more painful than what it's worth. I agree, having a soulmate must be wonderful but I don't have one so all I've experienced is the pain of watching others be happy with something I can't have. And so Me, Gojo, and Shoko all tried to make the best of everything. We focused on exercising curses and teaching the next generations of Jujutsu Sorcerers.

    I'm like an assistant teacher to Gojo, helping out the first years when he's out on missions and just helping with training in general. I would also sometimes help the second years if they needed it. 

    Right now I am accompanying the first years on a mission to investigate strange deaths. Three people were found dead just inside their homes or apartment buildings, after having reported odd happenings with the locks or door mechanisms. This fact led the higher ups to believe that it was the work of a cursed spirit and sent the first years to figure it out. I was there to make sure none of them died, instructions from Gojo after what happened with the curse womb at the juvenile detention center.

    We were currently at Megumi's old middle school, talking with faculty about the men who had died, as they had also attended the school in their youth. I wasn't really focused on the conversation as I was there as more of a body guard then an actual assistant for the first years. I felt it best to let them take care of the questions and figure everything out so they could learn for future experiences.

    While Kugisaki and Itadori were poking fun at Megumi for how he used to act in middle school, I started to feel a weird tingling sensation on my left wrist. It was strange, almost like pins and needles. I tried rubbing my wrist to get the feeling to go away but it wasn't working, when I looked at it there was nothing there. 

    After a few minutes of the weird feeling it went away. I was confused as nothing like this had ever happened before. But seeing as there was no evidence that it happened I brushed it off, if it was important there would be evidence that it happened.

    The three students had found out that all of the victims had gone to the same bridge together back when they were in middle school. So they decided to go try and investigate, to see if they could lure out the cursed spirit.

    I had joined them at the bridge as I didn't want to risk the curse showing up without me there. As the three tried different things like walking under the bridge, and even throwing Itadori over the side tied to a string (this nearly gave me a heart attack), to lure out the curse, I stood watch. I was completely focused on watching Kugisaki and Megumi pulling Itadori up, so it startled me that my wrist started to feel weird again.

    At first it was just pins and needles like before, but then it started to burn a little bit. I lifted my wrist to investigate and was shocked to see a small picture forming on the inside of my wrist. It looked like a drop of water based on the outline. I watched as it became more visible, slowly turning to a blood red color. I was extremely perplexed, what the hell is happening, I thought to myself. I was so focused on the mark that I didn't notice the three teenagers walking up to me.

    "Hey Y/n, nothing's happening. Maybe there's another connection or we missed something." Itadori said nearly bouncing over to me. As he got closer he noticed I wasn't paying attention to him. "What are you looking at? Get a scratch or something?" He asked, drawing the attention of the other two.

    Megumi leaned over to take a look at my wrist, also confused as to what had me so distracted. "Holy shit" I heard him mutter as he came to the same conclusion that I was still trying to wrap my head around. "When did that show up?" He asked, confusing his classmates.

    "I-it just showed up. I was just standing here watching you three to make sure nothing happened and my wrist started to tingle and then burn. After that it just slowly appeared." I explained what little I knew about the situation. "Why would this show up now, I've gone my whole life without it being there why is it here now. I was fine and happy without having to worry about it." I started ranting.

    Kegusaki looked at me confused before finally asking the question that perplexed her and Itadori. "What are you talking about and why does Fushiguro know about it?" 

    Knowing I was probably feeling too many emotions to explain anything, Megumi spoke up. "It's complicated and right here probably isn't the best place to explain it." We then met up with our diver at a small convenience store. I had almost completely shut down from the sudden appearance of my soul mark.

    While we were at the convenience store the first years were still trying to figure out what to do to trigger the curse. After a few minutes of getting nowhere Kugesaki got tired of the topic of conversation.

    "We are getting nowhere with this. Let's change the topic for a second." The redhead said, turning to me. "What's up with you? What happened while we were on the bridge?" She was confused yet curious as to what happened. Sure she was being a little pushy about it but that's how she is.

    Megumi moved in front of me to try and deflect the questions, and get back to the assignment. "Let's focus on the curse that's killing people, Kugesaki." As he said this Kugesaki rolled her eyes.

    "Come on Fushiguro, they're here to supervise and make sure none of us die. If their so thrown off by what ever happened, we all need to be made aware." She said making a valid point.

    As Megumi tried to say something else I put my hand on his shoulder and stepped forward. He looked at me concerned but he knew that I wouldn't say anything I didn't want to. "What happened on the bridge that threw me off is, my soul mark appeared. I've lived 25 years without one and was fully prepared to live without it. I don't know what caused it to suddenly appear because if I had a soulmate it would have been there when I was born. I'm still able to watch over you guys, it just startled me." I explained hopefully calming their nerves. "I'm not worried about it, it's probably nothing. Let's just focus on figuring out what's going on with this cursed spirit." Itadori nodded but still looked confused and Kugesaki looked pleased with the explanation.

    As I finished explaining what happened, one of the students from the middle school pulled up on a bike with a young woman asking to talk to Megumi about the weird deaths. The young woman explained that there was a sort of ritual to go out to the bridge. She had also informed Megumi that his sister had done the test of courage as well. Being even more determined to stop this curse, with his sister’s life at stake, we all headed back to the bridge.

    After doing the steps to summon the curse, it seemed we had entered the curse’s domain. As the students began to fight the curse a strange green round curse appeared behind us. When the initial confusion wore off, Itadori offered to take the hideous curse on by himself while the other two delta with bridges curse.

    While the two fights occurred Kugisaki was forced close to the edge of the barrier. I watched in shock as two hands reached through and pulled her out of the barrier. The green curse exclaimed something about his brother being there and rushed out of the barrier. Megumi took charge of the situation and ordered Itadori to go after the curse and assist Kugisaki. I would have stepped in but I had an odd feeling about the curses outside of the barrier. Like in some distant way they weren’t normal curses. I couldn’t react. 

    I was only able to watch as Megumi was able to finish off the cursed spirit that was cursing people. The only problem was the barrier didn’t dissipate. As I was about to ask if he was sure he finished exercising the curse, a more humanoid curse fell from the ceiling. Taking a defensive stance ready to take on the curse, as it appeared to be a much higher grade than the previous curse. Megumi stepped in front of me.

    “I’ll handle this, You were only sent here to keep us from dying. You just wait, if it looks like I’m done, go ahead and step in. It’s not a good idea for you to be using your cursed energy for battle right now.” He said summoning Demon Dog: Totality to help him in the fight. He made a good point, my cursed technique was better for defense and recovery. I could create a simple barrier around myself or someone else that was similar to Gojo’s infinity, but could still be broken with enough force. I am also able to use the reversed curse technique on others, not as efficiently as Shoko but still enough to keep someone on death's door from dying while waiting for Shoko. It made sense for me to wait, my techniques took a lot of energy, and the few offensive abilities I had were not suited for close combat. So I watched waiting for a moment that I would be needed.

    The fight between the special grade and Megumi went on for a while. There were a few points where I almost jumped into the fight but was stopped by the admittedly over confident teenager. Eventually he was able to exercise the curse and retrieve Sukana’s finger. He collapsed shortly after as the barrier disappeared around us. I immediately went to work healing his more major injuries, as he eventually passed out on the ground.

    A few minutes after the dark haired teen passed out the other two students hobbled on to the scene. “Oh my god, is he dead?” Itadori asked, looking at his friend passed out on the ground. This comment received a smack to the back of his head from Kugisaki as she quickly explained he was probably passed out and that I wouldn’t have let him die. He then noticed the cursed object sitting on the ground not far from Megumi and went to pick it up. “Do you want me to carry this since you’re busy healing Fushiguro?” He asked. As I was about to tell him he could as long as he didn’t eat it, a mouth formed on the palm of his hand consuming the finger. 

    I rolled my eyes as he started to defend himself, trying to explain it was Sukana who did that and he didn’t mean too. “It’s fine, Itadori. Next time I’ll just carry it. Now help me get Megumi up and back to the road.” I said moving to stand up, deciding it was time we head back to Jujutsu tech.

    It’s been about a month since the incident at the bridge, and since the mark on my arm appeared. For the most part I’ve ignored it, but when I see it I struggle not to spiral into a long train of questions as to why it randomly appeared, and what triggered it. Shoko proposed that it may have something to do with the two cursed wombs Itadori and Kugisaki killed. She suspected after performing autopsies on the corpses, that they were somehow two of the death paintings that were stolen during the sister school exchange event. She told me that it was possible that the third one was also fused with a human and incarnated into a living being, and it happened to be my soulmate. This thought concerned me, My soulmate was possibly a deformed human corpse fused with a cursed object, great. 

    Though it wasn’t any worse than the idea Saturo had. He had told me with a straight face that it took 25 years for my soulmark to appear because my soulmate hadn’t been born yet and they were probably a couple weeks old at this point. I know he was joking because one, many soulmate pairings had massive age gaps and the older party still had their mark at birth, and secondly because as soon as he saw the look of disgust on my face he burst out laughing his ass off. 

    I was glad that even though jokes were being made, Gojo and Shoko weren’t pushing me away for getting my soulmark. They treated me no differently, after all they had once had their own soulmates with them, even if it was far too short of a time for their liking. And don’t get me wrong I still have a distaste for the thought of soulmates, but for the first time in my life there is actual hope. Maybe it was just a mistake in the universe and whatever gave soulmarks was like shit missed one and fixed it, or maybe Shoko is right and my soulmate is an incarnated cursed object. Who knows but hopefully I find them soon and can experience the joy I’ve witnessed so many times over, even if it’s only for a short moment.

Timeskip to shibuya arc

    It’s been a few weeks since my soulmark appeared and I can’t help but feel anxious. Part of it is the excitement of finally having a soulmate but the other part is things have been getting worse in the Jujutsu community. With suspicion of a traitor at the kyoto school, the first years were requested to investigate. The problem with that was the suspected traitor was nowhere to be found and the trail went cold.

    Just over a week later all hell broke loose at a transit station in Shibuya. Many sorcerers were dispatched to wait as back up in case Gojo was unable to handle the citation. I had been waiting with Nanami, Ino and Megum when we were told to enter the barrier. Not long after entering, the shouts of Yuji Itadori could be heard throughout the veil.  Deciding a change of plans, we met with Itadori and were informed that Saturo had been sealed by the special grade curses that had organized the attack.

    While Nanami went to speak with Ijichi, the rest of us went to look for a way to dismantle the barriers. Currently Megumi and Itadori are fighting the curse user who had the objects creating the barrier, and me and Ino are trying to fight the other two on top of the building. We were given a shock when the man Ino was battling turned into Toji Fushiguro, gaining all the power of the dead sorcerer killer. When we thought things couldn’t get worse Ino was taken out and thrown off the side of the building, knowing I didn’t stand a chance in a fight against Toji I jumped hoping Megumi or Itadori would think of a way to save both of us.

    My prediction was right as one of Megumi’s shikigami caught me and Itadori managed to catch the unconscious Ino. When we landed, the boys told me that the barrier keeping sorcerers out was dismantled. Assessing the situation I came up with a plan that should help us greatly.

    “Ok here’s what’s gonna happen. Megumi and I are going to stay here while I heal Ino enough that he can be moved safely. Itadori you are gonna go try and find wherever Gojo is sealed in Shibuya station. Once I’m sure Ino is safe to move, I’ll follow after itadori to help him out, and Megumi will take Ino to Shoko so she can finish healing him.” I said, causing both boys to look at me in shock. It was a rarity that I would take charge of a situation but there was no time to freeze up right now. Becoming focused on the task of healing my coworker I ignored the boys trusting they will follow instructions.

     After about ten minutes I was confident that Ino would be fine to move, so I sent Megumi off to find Shoko while I went after Itadori. On my way to the station I passed Inumaki using his speech to help control the crowds and protect them from the mutated humans. I stopped for a few minutes to offer help in restoring his throat so it wasn’t too damaged from his technique and then went back to going after Itadori.

     A few minutes after entering the train station, I started to hear the sound of running water. I also noticed that the area I was in was completely destroyed, thinking the two things may be connected to Itadori. I followed the sound and path of destruction. As I got closer to the bathroom I noticed a large amount of water on the floor that was tinted pink from what I’m guessing is someone’s blood. Turning towards the men’s restroom I saw a familiar head of pink hair slumped against the wall.

     “Shit, Itadori are you alright?” I received no response. I kneeled down not caring that my pants would become soaking wet, I checked his pulse with a sigh of relief that he was still alive. Assessing the damage I knew that I would have to get the bleeding in his abdomen to stop or at least slow down a bit, before I could go after the fuck who hurt my student. I began using my reversed curse technique on the boy, focused on hopefully healing him enough that Sukana doesn't see a need to make an appearance.

     As I finished healing what I could, I noticed a strange feeling in my gut. It was almost like I was anxious or scared of something. It made no sense, sure I was worried for my friends and students, and the safety of all the non sorcerer's around during this horrible attack, but this feeling was weird. The feeling was almost like it was coming from someone else. Brushing it off, not having time to deal with this, I moved to follow the wet bloody footprints leading away from the bathrooms, assuming they belonged to whoever or whatever did this to Itadori.

    Rounding the corner as the footprints became harder to follow, the feeling in my gut got worse and an emotion I could only describe as self loathing joined the anxiety and worry. I was even more confused, I had heard before that when close to your soulmate there is a chance to feel their emotions but why on earth would my soulmate be in a place like this hating themself. Once again hoping it was just my imagination I continued my search. I stopped for a second as I started to hear mumbling coming from a little alcove just in front of me along the wall.

     “I almost killed him.” I heard the voice say. I could tell whoever it was, was distressed. “How could I almost kill my own brother?” The voice kept ranting, now I was concerned, this person almost killed their own brother and was now sitting in the deepest reaches of a train station overrun with curses and mutated humans, what was wrong with them.

     I approached the alcove with caution, if this person nearly killed someone they could be extremely dangerous. “Hey, sorry to bother you, but are you Ok?” I asked as I got close enough to see a man, probably in his early to mid twenties curled up on himself. He had medium length hair pulled up in two messy buns at the back of his head, he was also wearing a white robe with a purple vest. I couldn’t quite make out his face as it was buried in his knees but as I got closer to him I could feel the copious amounts of cursed energy flowing off him. It wasn’t as intense as Gojo or Okkotsu, but he was definitely special grade.

     After a few seconds, he jumped slightly looking up at me for only a moment before going back to his rambling. It’s like he didn’t even register that I asked a question. When he looked at me I could see the long black line across his face, to some it may have been an odd feature but to me it made him look more handsome. It may be weird to say but looking at this person curled in on himself with messy hair mumbling about almost killing someone, I couldn’t help but notice he was attractive. It also didn’t help that the longer I kneeled in front of him the more I felt emotions of anxiety and doubt.

      I tried speaking to him again. “Are you ok? Is there anything I can do to help?” The anxious feelings were becoming almost too much for me to handle. If they were coming from this man infront of me I needed to calm him down soon or we would both be having a breakdown. “Just talk to me for a second, I want to make sure you’re not hurt.” That comment seemed to reach him as he stopped mumbling, looking at me and making eye contact.

      He stayed frozen looking at me with those beautiful hazel eyes, it was like he was in a trance. I was about to speak again when I decided that a good way to calm him down if I really was feeling his emotions would be doing the opposite, projecting my emotions to my soulmate. If he is the reason behind the blood drop mark on my wrist, sending positive feelings should help him relax. To my surprise as soon as I started to calm myself to a relaxed point, I could see his face settle, he no longer looked like a kicked puppy but more a confused child.

      “What did you do to me?” Was the first not mumbled sentence out of his mouth. I looked at him for a moment trying to decide how to explain what I had just figured out. 

      I settled for smiling at him before explaining gently what just happened between us. “We are soulmates, two people destined to be together. We both have a mark to represent each other somewhere on our body, like this” I showed him my wrist as I explained it all. He looked at the blood drop for a second before he moved his arm to show me his wrist. In the exact same spot was a sphere that looked fairly similar to the barriers I can create around myself.

      “So that’s what this weird mark is, Mahito tried to tell me it was nothing and to ignore it.” He spoke explaining his knowledge of the mark. I was unsure of who this Mahito was but it seemed whoever it was, was trying to hide soulmates from him. I was slightly confused how a man in his twenties didn’t know about soulmates, but that was a question for later.

      Smiling at him I continued my explanation. “In addition to the marks, when soulmates are close to each other they can feel each other's emotions and strong emotions can influence the other. That's what I did, your feelings of anxiety and doubt were becoming too strong for me to stay focused so I calmed down my own feelings enough to help calm you down.” He nodded at the explanation, looking to the side for a moment before looking back. I could tell he was still a little anxious, whether that was because of finding out about soulmate, or what happened before I found him. I was unsure but I was going to figure it out. “Now that you’ve calmed down a bit do you mind telling me what happened? Why are you hiding in this alcove?” I asked as gently as possible not wanting to send him into another panic attack.

      He paused for a second before he started to explain. “I almost killed my little brother. I didn’t know he was my brother when we started fighting but when I was about to deliver the final blow I just knew he was my brother. It was the same feeling I got when my other brothers were killed. I can’t kill my brother even if he was the one to kill our other brothers. I hurt my brother and I have to make up for that. I have to protect him.” He started rambling again, not in the mumbling manner I found him in but it was hard to follow what he was saying. “He almost died because of me, and now he’s probably bleeding out because I hurt him,  because I didn't realize who he was sooner.” That sentence caught my attention.

      I remembered what led me to this spot, to finding him. Placing my hand on his shoulder to get his attention. “Slow down for a second, who and where is your brother?” I asked hoping to not get the answer I assumed was coming.

      “Yuji Itadori is my little brother. He's in the men’s bathroom.” He answered the question and I could tell he was about to start rambling again. Squeezing his shoulder again I drew his focus back to me.

      Pushing away my concern for the fact my soulmate was working with the curse’s that organized the attack. “He’s okay, I was actually looking for him earlier and found him in the bathroom. I was able to use my reverse cursed technique to stop the bleeding and keep him from dying. But what did you mean by he’s your brother, he never talked about having any siblings? Also he killed your other brothers?” I tried to reassure that Itadori was okay, but also asked for clarification. As far as I knew Itadori’s only family was his grandfather who passed away shortly before he became a sorcerer.

      He looked at me shocked that I knew who he was talking about. “Thank you. And I don’t know how to explain how he’s my brother, I just know he is. I have such a strong connection with my brothers. I felt when Yuji and Nobara Kugisaki ended the lives of my brothers Eso and Kechizu a few weeks ago, and I felt that same feeling when I was about to kill Yuji for revenge.” He explained in the best way he could.

     I nodded in understanding, he attacked Itadori in order to get revenge for his brothers, who I’m assuming were the two curses Itadori and Nobara fought at the bridge. Thinking about it they did say that when they finished off the curses they didn’t disintegrate like a normal curse and were just bodies as if they had killed humans. If that thing was this person's brother then what are they and why does he look so normal. “I can tell you’re confused, I’m assuming you probably were there when Yuji fought my brothers and are wondering what I am.” He was right, but how could he read me so well? I just nodded at him to continue. He went on to explain that he was a cursed object for 150 years until the attack on Jujutsu tech when he and two of his brothers were stolen. He explained that Mahito the patch faced curse, used his technique to give them bodies and use them as tools to fight sorcerers. He briefly explained that they sided with the curses because his brothers wouldn’t have been accepted by humans for the way they looked and he would have rather not had to help the curse who created him.

     “What do you mean by helping the curse that created you? Didn’t you say you were a cursed object for 150 years, wouldn’t the curse who made you be exercised by now?” I asked, interrupting his explanation.

     “The curse that made me is called Kenjaku, he was once a normal human who used his innate technique to transfer his brain to others to control them. 150 years ago he took over Noritoshi Kamo, using him to experiment on my mother who was able to carry the child of a curse. He tried nine times to get a living specimen but only received nine cursed objects that received the name Death paintings, I was the first one.” He explained his creation. As he was about to continue and explain how he was supposed to be helping Kenjaku in this day and age there was loud rumbling around us.

     I stood up quickly pulling him from the alcove looking around. The building looked like it was shaking. “As much as I’d love to keep chatting, I think we should probably get out of here.” I turned to him before I started to pull him in the direction of the exit. 

     “Wait, we have to get Yuji, we can’t leave him down here.” I heard behind me.

     “Look if Yuji is still down here than Sukana has probably taken over and if that’s the case he'll be fine.” i tried to explain, but the look on his face showed he was still concerned. “Listen, I know you want to make it up to him but you can't do that if we get crushed by a collapsing train station. As soon as we get out of this we will go find him I promise. You can trust me, I'm your soulmate after all, I’ll support you through this…” I wanted to address him by name but I realized in all of his explanations he never once told me his name, then again I never told him mine so it wouldn’t have been a fair trade. Continuing to pull him out of the station I decide it’s better late than never. “By the way I’m Y/n Y/l/n, and what can I call my handsome soulmate?” I asked him, feeling him stumble at the compliment.

     “Uh Choso. My name is Choso Kamo.” He said as we exited the train station. Finally knowing my soulmate's name felt amazing for some reason. It was probably due to the years of thinking it would never happen but I knew that no matter what this crazy world throws at us next we will handle it together.

[babydollmarauders]

MEDIA MANAGEMENT — JACK HUGHES (23-24 SZN PART 11)

au masterlist

y/ndevils00

liked by jackhughes, nicohischier, and 251,869 others

y/ndevils00 well… that was painful

welcome back to my post-game recap! if you don’t know who i am because you’ve been living under a rock, or you’ve been in jail (don’t do crimes unless you can get away with them), i’m y/n! or as my boyfriend calls me, ‘dove’! i work as the social media manager for one of the sluttiest teams (and maybe the worst this season…) in the National Hockey League: the New Jersey Devils!

let get into it! your favorite (or maybe least favorite. i wouldn’t blame you!) men from hell lost 4-6 against the patriotic old guys tonight…. i can’t say i wasn’t surprised

we had an absolutely scoreless (and sinless) first period on our end, transitioning into intermission down by 3!

but second period is when we really started heating up! we got FOUR lovely goals by THREE lovely people!!

starting with uncle Toffee!! who scored our first AND our fourth goal!! he’s been so queen girlboss slay recently! who knew he would be this good?! not me! i doubted him severely! (i cannot apologize for my previous thoughts about you uncle, i can only ask you to forgive me anyways because you took my DILH and i’m still recovering)

Timo the absolute Tank Engine got us our second goal of the night with his first goal of the season! and no penalties!! i feel like a proud mother to a usually extremely horribly behaved little boy 🥹

and of course, my favorite whore, my very best swiss, my least favorite kind of cheese; captain slut got our third goal of the night!! THAT’S MY HOE!! POP OFF! (he also got a penalty tonight but i’ve opted not to show that because he paid me $20)

and i could never forget to mention that my beautiful angel of a bad bitch, Rowdy, got an assist on THREE out of four of our goals tonight!! he’s only 3 points away from 20 points already!! THAT’S MY (baby)GIRL!

and third period is when we immediately went as cool as the ice they skate on… giving up three goals (including an empty netter to the oldest looking man alive)… we got no goals of our own and my sweet baby angel face bestie number 1 got a penalty for being too perfect 😔

all-in-all, let’s wish the boys luck against the sabres on friday because apparently they need it! i think friday’s enemy gave them some pretty good advice though and they should put it to use!

p.s. ikea baby and merc-dog are my exact reactions to how badly we played in the third

p.p.s. ovi… when i catch you ovi 🥊😑

tagged john.marino97, tofff73, tmeier96, nicohischier, jackhughes, lhughes_06, jesperbratt, and dawson1417

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jackhughes dove, baby, what is that abomination of a 5th photo?

y/ndevils00 my camera wouldn’t focus :(

jackhughes so why post it?

y/ndevils00 you don’t appreciate my talents

jackhughes i can assure you, i appreciate your talents plenty. photo taking is just usually not one of them

lhughes_06 gross

user29 did she just threaten OVECHKIN?! 😭

user17 i fear we may lose these updates after this threat 😪

jesperbratt what was i 😦 at?

y/ndevils00 i honestly couldn’t tell you— i was too busy wondering the best way to fit you in my pocket

john.marino97 i got a picture?!

y/ndevils00 you got an assist and no penalties!

john.marino97 but dawson got a penalty and no assists and still got a picture?

y/ndevils00 you’re not dawson, the standards for you are different

john.marino97 i’ve known you for 4 years and this is how i get treated? DAWSON HAS ONLY KNOWN YOU FOR 2!

y/ndevils00 you tattle on me, you deserve your treatment

dawson1417 she’s got you there, bud

tofff73 you doubted me?!

y/ndevils00 in my defense, i didn’t know you were chill like that

tofff73 jack has informed me that you cried at the trade, i forgive your doubts

y/ndevils00 @/jackhughes YOU’RE TELLING HIM MY SECRETS?!

jackhughes @/y/ndevils00 i wasn’t aware that you usually blast your “secrets” on your instagram story

user81 the random luke picture… y/n loves her smush 🥹

tmeier96 did you just call me a tank engine?

tmeier96 also, i’m OLDER than you!

y/ndevils00 that was a compliment! i’m saying you’re built!

tmeier96 you’re a funny little thing

y/ndevils00 also yes you are older— i said i FELT like a proud mother, not that i AM one. i already have one reckless child at home, i don’t want another

jackhughes @/y/ndevils00 she’s a cat.

y/ndevils00 @/jackhughes SHE IS OUR BABY

trevorzegras you love testing how far you can push before you get a warning for your behavior, don’t you?

y/ndevils00 i learned from you 🫶

trevorzegras you’re a cockroach

y/ndevils00 all i’m hearing is that i’m resilient and can live through anything

trevorzegras i hate you

y/ndevils00 you WISH you hated me— if you really did then you wouldn’t facetime me twice a week

nicohischier there are so many things i take issue with about my paragraph

y/ndevils00 is it that it’s not long enough? i’m sorry, i’ll make it longer next time!

nicohischier please DON’T.

lhughes_06 ya know, you were a lot nicer before i joined the team

y/ndevils00 oh good! that means i’m doing this right!

lhughes_06 doing what right?

y/ndevils00 tough love!

dawson1417 i didn’t do anything :(

y/ndevils00 i know, sugarplum!

dawson1417 they jailed me…

y/ndevils00 i can’t imagine how traumatic that must’ve been for you

dawson1417 oh it wasn’t that bad, you were in there too

y/ndevils00 yeah…. lindy put me there in 2nd intermission. he said if i wouldn’t stop chirping the capitals as though i was a player, then i needed to be treated like a player and get a penalty…. then i couldn’t get out because the game started again

dawson1417 you can’t skate, how did you get in?

y/ndevils00 i was betrayed

nicohischier @/y/ndevils00 i stand by it.

y/ndevils00 @/nicohischier YOU ALMOST DROPPED ME TWICE

nicohischier those were on purpose.

dawson1417 and how did you get out?

y/ndevils00 my knight in shining armor!

jackhughes @/y/ndevils00 i didn’t get you out?

jesperbratt i did!

jackhughes oh, yeah, that makes sense

[alexanderlightweight]

I miss writing. I miss malec

I plot in my head every night but it’s not the same.

I miss writing about how Magnus and Alec tease and find and appreciate and murder for each other and how much they love each other.

I miss Team Immortal and how Magnus and Cat and Ragnor and magical rituals and the spiral labyrinth politics and the finer elements of magical and warlock culture and

I miss diving into world building with magical botony and zoology and thread magic to pocket dimensions. How magic isn’t equal and there’s different levels and wild nature magic. The way that while the spiral labyrinth has changed and evolved, that it still holds to the very oldest of rituals. Everything carefully and continually read by each new Elder and the acolytes of the library learn by trade. Because knowledge isn’t kept in books alone. There are singing histories and spells kept alive by enchanted pieces and the memories of those devoted to learning. Carving and thread work and rituals in tapestry or furniture.

(Because elder isn’t a title based on just age but also elder knowledge. Warlocks who especially dedicate themselves to either singular or a plethora of fields and excel at creation and learning become elders. The very best researchers and scholars of the wealth of knowledge and magical prowess. Being an elder isn’t just a perk it’s a dedication and an oath to the protection and betterment of their people. Active oaths to keep them from stagnating in the decades of immortality and aging.

If you truly start slacking or losing your way, the magic prods you. Eventually you are forced to make a choice, forsake your roll as an Elder and retract and be released from your vows. Or uphold them. )

Metalworking and leather working and the labyrinth contains it all.

I love expanding on the shadowworld and the different ways magic is used by each race and how they all separately interact with the outskirts of the mundane world.

Of figuring out how a warrior society would work and the different styles of life that could have evolved.

And how much sheer adoration and platonic love is between the three of them. And the trust.

Because even when Ragnor is ignoring Magnus (a petty fight that turned into a research binge that turned into a few more years of silence than intended while Ragnor experimented in a pocket library) Magnus is still going to show up and make sure he’s fed and hydrated because the pettiness never outweighs the care.

(Cat has spells on all their vitals and vise versa. But she sent Magnus over with an excuse around year theee when she figured Ragnor had just lost track of time. Magnus doesn’t even remember that Ragnor was being petty and Ragnor doesn’t remember the argument at all).

I miss Alec figuring out what he enjoys and that he’s allowed to enjoy.

Honestly I got a little off track but I’ve been wanting to write malec and post for so long.

I miss the interactions and comments and looking forward to new Wednesday prompts. I miss writing Wednesdays so much and I’m looking forward to starting them up again when I’m healed :/

This took about an hour to write the first time but half got deleted and had to be rewritten when Nightshade started barking outside (it’s past the neighborhood noise curfew and I had to run to grab him so we stayed polite).

Nightshade likes to go outside and ‘guard’ the house for a bit every night before his door gets locked shut for bed, but since bed is subjective to my insomnia and not his sleep schedule he sometimes goes to ‘guard’ rather late. He huffily settled in his crate, perturbed I wouldn’t let him ‘protect’ the House.

Honestly I’m just happy I can write on my phone without a ton of pain anymore.

💜 lumine

The House made a rule (without me lol I was outvoted) that every time anyone buys anything they have to consider if it’s for public House use and if it is, how likely I am to injure myself with it. Or how likely is it to randomly break and hurt me.

It’s very sweet but I hate that it says something that they all agreed. It’s also hilarious because I’m the one who does all the yard work (I’ve had to delay fertilizing for a month and had to stop PT for 3.5 weeks while it healed enough for me to go) so I have axes, clippers, trimmers I use frequently.

[stargirlexpressss]

Hi, how are you?

If your requests for Art are still open there is something i would love to see if possible.

Wednesday stood in front of the Mirror of Erised from Harry Potter, where she see's Enid in the mirror because Enid is the most desperate desire of her heart, with Wednesday having an earth shattering look of longing for her.

Thank you, hope you have a good day :)

Hello helloooooooo

I hope i satisfied ur request, ik I already posted smth today but I just couldn’t resist drawing this!!!!! I’m not the best at expressions, but i tried my best to combine Wednesday’s stoicism and hozier level yearning in one.

Also, Hogwarts Wenclair headcanons to go with this:

- Wednesday was def a hatstall, because she is ridiculously brave, undeniably curious and free thinking AND ambitious/ resourceful. She started cursing the sorting hat after it took too long to sort her so she was immediately put into Slytherin.

- She rooms with Yoko in this AU and Enid practically lives at their dorm. They still have those domestic shenanigans going on, but they’re not roommates.

- Enid is very popular. Star quidditch player, CAPTAIN of the quidditch team since fourth year, extroverted as hell, smart but only putting effort into subjects she’s interested in, very much lovable student athlete.

- They didn’t fuck with each other at all for the first three years at hogwarts. Enid def talked shit abt wednesday in front if her face AND behind her back, while wednesday pulled the pettiest pranks on her whilst claiming she had nothing to do with any of them.

- obviously wednesday is lily and james live! Harry in this, so she has near death experiences every single year. Because she’s a Slytherin she doesn’t get the praise that OG harry does, people just whisper behind her back and she hates it. The only people who are straight up bitches to her are Enid, Bianca and sometimes Yoko (cause really, she can’t be bothered to care most of the time). So, consequently the only people she kind of respects are those three.

- in fourth year, Enid and Wednesday are picked for the triwizard tournament, (lower year limit in this AU) and just like Cedric and Harry, Enid and Wednesday trauma bond over it.

- Enid doesn’t die unlike Cedric, SHE saves Wednesday’s life at the graveyard.

- Wednesday used to see other things in the mirror of erised, in first year she saw her pet nero alive and well, but it felt like her heart stopped beating when she looked into it a second time and she saw Enid’s smiling face.

Thank you so much for the ask, this was so fun 🖤🩷

[autumnleaves1991-blog]

 "What's your problem with me?" Arkham Knight x F! Reader

Summary: Continuation of this story. Years later, your quiet morning is interrupted when the Arkham Knight sends his soldiers to collect you. Masks are torn away and the man you once loved is revealed but he's not the same Jason Todd you knew, will it be enough?

Pairing: Arkham Knight (Jason Todd) x F! Reader (wears glasses)

Warnings: 18 + for language, violence, blood, guns, mentions of death, torture, and killing.

Cross Posted on AO3

The rain streams down the window pane and you wipe at your eyes, the sleep coming off on your fingetips as you put on your glasses. It’s early and this calls for some tunes. You turn up the music on your phone, shaking your hips as you pour a cup of coffee. 

The stillness of the morning is rather rudely interrupted by the shattered glass and the body sliding across your floor. You scream as three men crash into the apartment, guns drawn and you duck covering your head below the counter. 

“Shit,” you hear someone shout, “where the fuck did she go?!” 

“I don’t know, but we better find her. We know what happens when we fail him.” 

You grab a knife off the counter, clutching it in your hands before taking a deep breath and counting to three. Their heavy boots round the corner and you pounce. The first one goes down with a scream, holding a hand to his neck where the blood gushes out, pouring over his fingertips. 

“Shit,” you hear another shout, “get the fucking knife!” 

The remaining two aim there guns and you wipe a hand across your forehead, the blood trailing across your skin. “You won’t shoot me! I heard you, you’re boss wants me alive.” 

“He said alive, Princess,” the one on the left sneers, “he didn’t say spoiled.”  

“Who the fuck do you work for?” the adrenaline is spiking leaving a metallic tang on your tongue. “What's your problem with me?!” 

“Take her,” the one on the left flips a switch on his gun, the light turning from red to blue before he takes the shot. A bolt of electricity runs through your body and as the room darkens you hit the ground with a dull thud. 

The yelling you wake too does nothing to ease the ache in your head. You blink, eyes adjusting as the room spins in a kaleidoscope of colors. “Shit,” you close your eyes rubbing your head. The couch beneath you is well worn but the blanket thrown across you is soft to the touch. 

“I TOLD YOU NOT TO HURT HER!” a modulated voice shout, “I DONT TOLERATE MISTAKES.” The gun shot has your eyes snapping open and you struggle to burrow deeper into the couch. 

The door is thrown open and a masked figure steps inside. Their chest heaving. You yelp when they smash the gun down on the table and their head quickly looks at me. “You’re safe,” the voice says, their hands raising up to show them empty, “I’m not gonna hurt you.” 

“I’d beg to differ,” you clutch the blanket tighter, “are they dead?” You nod towards the door behind them. 

They pause glancing over their shoulder before letting out a very human sigh, “yes. They’re dead.” 

“Then why would I trust you?” 

They stand their for a moment contemplating what you’re unsure. They lift a hand and flick a switch, “because I would never let anything happen to you.” 

Your chest pounds, and you stand nearly falling over with the way your head spins. The mask is still in place but you know that voice. He reaches out to help before you fall to the floor, his hands quickly retreating when you right yourself. “Jason?” you whisper, the ache growing the longer he waits to answer. 

He turns, walking over to the window gazing down at the city. You follow, always the moth to his flame. Below is chaos, every sort of bus imaginable filled to the brim as people fight for a seat out of the city. “What’s happening?” 

“Scarecrow gave them a taste of what true fear looks like,” he replies somberly. 

“I don’t understand…” 

“I couldn’t,” he fumbles over the words, “I couldn’t let you go.”

“Jason,” you press a hand to his arm softly.

But he’s quick, pressing you into the wall, a gloved hand around your throat, “Jason Todd is dead!” 

You grab the hand, digging your nails in but he’s not squeezing, just pinning you to the wall. He trembles, brow furrowing beneath the mask at your lack of fear. “Jason,” you whisper, “take off the mask.” 

He squeezes and you gasp before he lets go, his face getting closer to yours, the cold metal of the helmet pressed to your cheek, “I told you, Jason Todd is dead.” 

“Then who are you? Why am I here?” 

“I’m the Arkham Knight. And you’re here because- “ he steps back, leaving you pressed against the wall. He rest his hands on the rail, tightening his grip. “Hal’s is gone.” 

“What?” you press of the wall, “what do you mean?” 

“Scarecrow pumped his fear gas into the place. The patrons tore each other apart. I had you brought here so you would be safe.” 

“My employees? The customers? They’re all dead?” Your stomach churns and you feel nauseous. “I’m gonna be sick.” He turns grabbing you before you fall and helping you to the couch, the trash can appears in his hands and you lose the contents of your stomach. 

“Oh my god,” you press a hand to your head sobbing, “why didn’t you just let me die?! That was all I had left of him. If you’re not really Jason then I have nothing. Just put me in the cold ground beside him.” 

“You own the diner? I thought you just worked there.” 

“I bought it a few years ago. It was all I had left of him. I couldn’t let it go.” You press tour palms into your eyes, rocking back and forth, “I couldn’t let him go.” 

The hiss of the mask opening makes you freeze and you keep your eyes shut tight. “Look at me,” his voice is crystal clear and the tears flow down your cheeks threatening to drown you. You shake your head, and his voice comes out more forcefully, “look at me.” 

“No,” you cry. 

He grabs your wrists, tightening around them painfully, before he pulls you up, “LOOK AT ME!” 

The air is sucked out of your lungs, tears streaming down your face, and you whimper as his hands tighten, not doubt leaving bruises.

It’s him.

A ghost of a man you loved, his skin is covered in scars, a raised brand of a J on his cheek. His eyes are wide and his breathing is erratic as he meets your eyes. “Jason,” you cry, “oh my god, you’re alive.” 

His group loosens and you collapse against his chest sobbing. Muscle memory takes over and he holds you to him, his hands rubbing over your back. His chin resting on the top of your head. 

You pull back, your hand resting on his cheek and his eyes close, leaning into your touch. “I love you,” you whisper, “I love you so fucking much. I never got to tell you,” you speak quicker almost afraid you’ll wake from a dream. “I know you knew it though, how could you not? I never stopped loving you.” 

His eyes slowly blink open, his voice pained, “I’m not the Jason you knew,  Doll. He died in the underbelly of Arkham.” 

“Arkham?” you furrow your brow, “you’ve been at Arkham Asylum this whole time?” 

“No,” he shakes his head, “but I was there for two years. The Joker…he tortured me…burned me, cut me, beat me, broke me.” 

“Oh god,” you can’t even imagine what he’s been through, “how did you escape?” 

“He left me to die. Beat me within an inch of my life with a crowbar and left. I think he got tired of me.” He sounds exhausted and you push him into the couch, looking around the room before seeing the restroom and taking a step towards it. He reaches out for your arm, “don’t leave me.” 

“I’m not,” you promise, “never again. Trust me.” He nods, letting you go and you run to the bathroom, rinsing your mouth with water and grabbing a threadbare towel and rinsing it under cold water. 

You walk back into the room and approach slowly, sitting down onto the couch beside him. “Tell me everything.” 

He tells you how he escaped Arkham, how he fled when he realized the Joker was still alive, that he’d been replaced. You remove his gloves, brushing the blood from his fingertips as he tells you the tale. “Why didn’t you ever come and find me?” 

“I did. I went to the diner and saw you sitting there. The same beautiful girl I left behind. But I wasn’t the same Jason you knew. My time with the Joker changed me. I didn’t want to taint your memories but returning to you half a man.” 

“I hate that you took the decision away from me,” he turns his head to look at you, “I hate that you think I’d love you any less because of what happened.” 

“I’m a murderer,” he states it plainly, “I’m going to destroy Gotham. I’m going to kill Batman. I’m going to burn this city to the fucking ground and when it’s gone I’m gonna dance on it’s grave.” 

“Okay,” you whisper, his eyes widening as you straddle his waist. Your arms wrapping around his neck, his hands firm on your waist as he tugs you closer. Your lips but a breath away, “what’s next?” 

“You don’t know what you're asking for,” he doesn’t push you away, instead he leans closer. “If you stay I’m going to drag you down with me.” 

“Sounds perfect,” there is no space left between you and his lips turn up into a smirk you’ve not seen in years.

“Yeah?” he whispers, his lips brushing yours with every word. 

“I can’t think of anywhere else I’d rather be.” His mouth slams to yours and you moan, the feeling of home is euphoric. 

“Fuck,” he groans, devouring your mouth in a mess of tongues and teeth. “I missed you so much, Doll. I never got to tell you I love you.” He breaks away a trail of saliva connecting the two of you. His eyes turn black with rage, his grip on you tightening, “that fucking clown took everything away from me.” 

“Come back,” you run your hands through his hair, “he can’t hurt us anymore. He’s dead, nothing but ash. I’m real,” you grab his hand and he lets go pressing his hand to your chest so he can feel your heart, “you’re alive, you made it out.” 

His eyes go soft, the pupils receding as he listens to the thump of your heart. His breathing slows down to match your own. “I’m going to burn Gotham,” he repeats, “I’m going to kill Batman.” 

“Okay,” you nod, pressing a chaste kiss to his lips. “Kill Batman, burn the city, and then when you're done we leave. We leave all of this behind and live our lives together. We put away the masks, and go.” 

“I love you,” he kisses your lips softly whispering the words over and over again. 

“I love you. All of you. I’ll be here when you get back,” you lean back pressing the button on the helmet, his eyes never leaving yours the entire time as he’s sealed back inside. The eyes glow and you smile, giving a kiss where his mouth would be,  “Now go kill the Batman.” 

[wonjnz]

drunk on (the thought of loving) you

₊˚⊹ summary: five years of loving hanbin can be told within taking five shots.

₊˚⊹ genre: angst (idk if this is even sad at all.. VV SLICE OF LIFE), best friend!hanbin, collegel!au | wc: 2.2k

₊˚⊹ warning(s): swearing, mentions of drinking | inspo: that’s what you get - paramore

₊˚⊹ a/n: idk this was kinda scrapped last month .. i’ll just post this bc i wanna keep this acc alive!!!

i. the first shot

you vividly remember watching hanbin crying in the driver’s seat.

you were the first person he called right after he got dumped by his now ex-girlfriend; and all you could do was watch and offer him a few tissues from the passenger’s side, occasionally offering a “she wasn’t all that, anyway.” whenever hanbin would rant about how much he wasted his love on her just to get ghosted.

“i don’t know anymore, y/n. am i that dumb to not notice she isn’t into me?” he asks despite his throat dry from crying, looking at you.

and that’s when you had that damn cheesy realization the moment you looked at hanbin again — the realization where you’ve stupidly fallen for your long-time best friend and that stupid, high school love you’ve been trying to avoid for all these years slowly dawns on you now despite both of you in college.

you shrug your feelings off for the meantime, “of course not. plus, you deserve someone way better.” you assure him.

the moment you arrive home, you’ve had the whole night to confirm that you were, in fact, helplessly in love with sung hanbin.

you don’t even know how it started — maybe it was during the one time he tiredly slept on your shoulder while on the way home from a field trip, or the way he’d always invite and mention you everywhere and anytime he could to the point even his friends thought you were together, and you don’t even dare try to remember how he said “i’ll love you whenever nobody is there to do it.” that one night during your nightly calls.

and as if that wasn’t already a big wave enough, zhang hao’s reaction to it felt like a tsunami.

“say you’re kidding right now.” zhang hao says in disbelief at your confession the next day, putting his drink down to focus solely on you. “you, liking your — our best friend since middle school, right after his ass got dumped?”

you frown and shrug as a reply, “i don’t know, everything just clicked that time. i think that’s like three years worth of having to interpret his mixed signals towards me.”

zhang hao sighs at your confused state, taking a sip from his coffee before speaking up, “so you’ve liked him for at least three years now?”

slowly nodding, you put your head in your hands. “god, i’m such a fucking dumbass, hao.” you say exasperatedly as you dread the day you’d grow tired and finally confess to hanbin,

“you think you’ll try talking to him about it soon?”

“i don’t think i’ll ever have the guts to tell him, hao.” you say defeatedly, looking down at your phone to see that hanbin sent another really long rant about his ex. “not when he’s still fresh out of a relationship, that’s for sure.”

“i’m just scared that once i confess, i’ll ruin everything. i’ll ruin us.”

you felt helpless, hopeless even, just the mere thought of seeing hanbin’s pitiful reaction at your confession is enough to make you pass out in the bustling cafe you were in. what more when he’ll start distancing himself days after? you were terrified.

zhang hao waves your fear off nonchalantly, “you’ll never know. what if you’re in some kind of drama and this could be your chance?” he tries to lighten the mood, smiling victoriously when you raise your eyebrows at him.

“don’t feed into my delusions hao,” you roll your eyes at him. “i'll just tell him once i'm over from this whole dumb ‘liking your best friend’ thing.”

“by the looks of it, i don't think that's happening anytime soon.”

you scoff and playfully hit zhang hao’s shoulder, receiving a small scowl from him, “but you gotta admit, we make a good pair,”

“he just doesn't love me that way.”

ii. the second shot

sometimes you wish you weren’t too adamant on hanbin drinking his heartbreak out, especially now that you’re left with a drunk-out-of-his-mind hanbin in your apartment. (you mentally curse zhang hao for leaving earlier than expected.)

the night started off with the three of you making a toast to hanbin moving on, which then evolved into a mini ranting session about going into college life, then a sudden karaoke break, zhang hao leaving after, and now this.

you’re both slouched on the dining table, arms serving as your only pillow because for some reason you can’t walk over to your sofa, and with no knowledge of time as you ramble on about the most random topics you could think of.

hanbin hums amusingly, “y’know, even if you say nobody is there to love you, i’m always here as your best friend.” his words slurred and groggy. and even with the amount of alcohol in your system numbing your senses, you still felt that little sting in your heart, you only laugh as a reply.

“so you'll only ever see me as a friend?”

you hear him hum lowly, “of course, what else would i think of you as?”

right, of course.

“not even more than a friend?” you, or the alcohol in your system, ask again. hanbin slowly hums again, the sound softening until you're met with nothing but the sound of the bustling city outside your apartment.

a few minutes passed by and you finally gain the strength to at least sit up, the sight of hanbin sleeping coming in full view — his slight pout, light breathing with a few snores here and there, and ruffled hair was honestly a sight you wished you could look at forever. but you swear the longer you stared at him, that god-awful feeling of regret starts to feel even stronger than before.

but that night, you fell in love with sung hanbin for a second time.

iii. the third shot

“you know, we started talking again.” hanbin shares through the phone, going silent as he expects some reaction. no way.

you shift in your seat, “seriously? didn’t you say you officially moved on like what, two years ago?” hanbin smiles sheepishly to himself before saying, “she messaged me last night, so i replied. we talked the whole time i barely slept.”

“we’ll hang out a bit after this actually! you wanna join us?” he offers innocently, your heart receiving a jab this time when you noticed how excited his voice seemed just at the mere thought of seeing her, you knew hanbin well enough to know he was madly in love yet again.

you stay silent for a few minutes before speaking up, “you guys have fun, i don’t wanna be the third-wheel between you two.” hanbin mumbles a small ‘awe,’ before eventually ending the call to get ready.

next thing you know, you’re on facetime with zhang hao bawling your eyes out about what just happened. “see i told you, he’s still hung up on her.” he says while walking around his apartment.

genuinely speaking you don’t know what’s worse, the harsh truth zhang hao was telling or the way you could barely hear his voice due to the amount of muffling and moving he’s doing.

“did you see the way he’s talking about her? he’s literally the most obvious man alive.”

“you’re really not helping me here hao.”

“right, sorry.” zhang hao immediately shuts up, humming a bit before speaking up again. “i know it’s not easy, but at least try to move on from him, y’know?” he says, his voice filled with sympathy at your state.

before you could speak up zhang hao continues on, “it’s not possible, i know, or — i don’t know, just tell him so you can get that burden off, i’m sure he’ll understand anyway.”

you groan at the thought of confessing, “are those really my only choices?”

“unless you wanna live with getting hurt over and over again, yeah.” zhang hao shrugs.

you sigh at his advice, he was right after all, but every time you remember your friendship is at stake; you back out at the last minute. “i’ve been handling this for two years, hao, don’t you think i can handle two more?” zhang hao chuckles almost pitifully.

“of course not, you’ve been handling this whole hanbin thing for, correction, five years too long. you've genuinely gone batshit crazy.”

“honestly hao fuck you because was the last part really that necessary?”

iv. the fourth shot

god, you’re tired of hanbin’s constant compliments about her; how she’s the best person in the world, how she’s the prettiest girl he’s seen, how she’s so special and dear to him. almost every conversation you’ve had would always go back to something related about her, even if it meant the most absurd topics only you three would know. the topic could be about how zhang hao got lost in the middle of a forest and hanbin would still tie it back to her.

hell, he even mentions her even while drinking.

but you’ve handled it for five years now, so what’s the difference?

the three of you were celebrating your graduation in zhang hao’s apartment, the bouquet from your parents laying on the sofa while your togas were thrown across the room while zhang hao’s coffee table was filled with a bunch of soju and shot glasses you bought from a nearby convenience store.

“thank god we’re finally graduates, i can finally escape from all those girls taking candid pictures of me.” zhanghao sighs in relief the moment he starts downing his first drink of the night, pouring more.

“you sure? i already saw new fansites of you online, they’ll never leave you alone at this rate.” hanbin retorts, you chuckle at zhang hao's horror as he's frantically checking his twitter to see pictures of him at his graduation.

the night, cliché enough, felt like a dream. the three of you basking in the temporary freedom of adulthood before you start looking for work.

as it went on, you missed the days where you could look at hanbin without noticing the stars in his eyes, the days where you could still speak full coherent sentences whenever his attention is fully on you, and zhang hao noticed.

“it's just hard to say no to someone you really loved,” you hear hanbin say, zhang hao had brought up his ex (to your absolute horror and zhang hao's drunkenness) and you've been quiet the whole conversation.

“especially with her, it felt like i had no more to give but the moment we talked — there was still something left.”

you chuckle, not at him, but the way his words hit how you feel with hanbin right in the center. and yet you just can't refuse to give hanbin the little love you have left even when he's freely giving his own to someone else.

you take another shot to drown your feelings out more, “so you just can't say no, right?” you ask, seeing if he feels the same way.

hanbin smiles at you before nodding, placing his shot glass down to lean back on his chair. “yeah. you really can't.” he answers, confirming that you were both experiencing the same form of love. but painfully enough, just not towards each other.

god, was the truth so anticlimactic for you.

the way hanbin talks about her with the same lovestruck eyes whenever you talk about him to zhang hao, how you notice the little things in hanbin the way he also notices the little things in her — you knew it from the start.

but to see it slapped to your face despite knowing how it'll end, just felt like reality slowly kicking in the more drinks you take.

and now, under zhang hao's dim apartment lights, you realized that the truth that sung hanbin will never see you as more than his most cherished best friend since middle school, really does hurt.

you swear you were just drinking your first shot, but when you woke up to find yourself on zhang hao's bed; a loud snore coming from the living room and—

v. the fifth shot

“you awake?”

shit.

quickly turning to hanbin's figure by the bedroom door despite the pounding headache, you slowly nod. “just woke up actually.”

as you slowly look at hanbin by the bedroom door, you immediately remember the day you realized your feelings for him — his face puffy from crying yet still so pretty under that orange sunset glow, his hands that’d usually tap on the steering wheel when he was starting to calm down again, and the way his shirt was so wrinkled in one specific area from all the bunching.

it felt almost too poetic to have that sort of realization under the sunset in his car, almost as if you’re bidding goodbye to the days you used to look at him as just your best friend.

so you, or the remaining alcohol in your system figured, rather, that you make use of the sunrise to finally welcome the harsh truth of confessing to him.

and you did.

“i love you.”

you’re met with nothing but silence, looking down to save yourself from bawling your eyes out in front of him.

“i’ve loved you for five years, hanbin. five fucking grueling years.” you manage to croak out, not noticing the way hanbin slowly makes his way towards you, nor the way his eyes significantly soften when he sees zhang hao’s sheets slowly staining from your tears.

a few minutes pass without much happening, the room only filled with the sounds of your sniffling.

“i’m sorry, y/n.” hanbin whispers, eventually embracing you to at least bring some comfort. but to his dismay, his actions just made you cry even harder; not because you just got rejected, but because of how soft his voice and embrace was it felt like he was pitying you.

in his defense, who wouldn’t? you loved him for so long, despite knowing he’s still hung up on his ex-girlfriend and regardless will still see you as his most precious best friend. all he could do at the moment was continuously say ‘i’m sorry’ whenever you cling onto his shirt tighter as support.

as you continue to cry in his embrace, you realized that under the sunset, you were there to comfort hanbin. but as you’re both waiting for the sunrise, you figured he’ll never be the one there for you like he promised.

[gdn019283]

Could have destiny, and therefore Arthur’s death, really be avoided in Merlin? Or were things supposed to flow like that either way?

The first thought that struck me, as soon as the last episode ended, was the usual “what if?” that keeps this fandom alive, alongside the plethora of theories (that I like looking into and discuss) questions, answers and headcanons.

But no matter how many times I think about it, I personally believe that the answer to the question in the title is simply:

No.

It couldn’t.

The directors, no matter how many choices they made, that we could either think are wrong or not, had also made a wonderful job of deceiving us, but not really, and ending the show with a tragedy and a good fucking plot.

What is the plot, you may ask?

“You don’t choose destiny, destiny chooses you”,

and I think it’s brilliant.

First thing first, destiny:

The directors said: “Fuck it.” They tried everything they could do so that Merlin, at the end of the day, had only one choice. It is really an hard point to make, especially because we like to think that if Merlin had done something differently, things could have actually took another road, and yes, it could have, but it didn’t happen, because we needed an enemy in the show, and it was made on purpose. I like to think that the directors knew it would piss people off. It did. Great job, you guys, I still think about it after fifteen years.

Second thing, who’s the bad guy? (Uther)

What I mean by this, is that I’m asking this question to the main characters who the directors wanted us to believe they were objectively good, right, like Merlin, or Gaius, and even Arthur. How about, no one of them had to be completely good? It hurts less if the characters I just cited acted differently, like we oftentimes say of Merlin, but it’s fiction, and we wouldn’t have Tumblr to discuss it on, if they were all perfect, so why not give them some very bad flows? *cough* All the better if they’re murderers *cough*. Now, if it were reality, I too would have said: “Go to hell”, but it’s BBC Merlin, so let me have some fun.

Morgana is bad, Merlin could be too, Arthur even, also Gwen, Lancelot too, and all the wicked team we’ve got. Oh, especially the toilet they had instead of a king, the one and only Uther Pendragon. I even said that Gaius is bad, and offended Hunith of all people, so let’s get to my point. Merlin could have done things differently? Yes. But Morgana, too. Hell, also Arthur. The point of the TV show is the very, very bad choice Uther made of being a tyrant, so. Merlin could have told Morgana he had magic? Yep, but sometimes I believe Morgana had to be evil, so even if she could have become like that in another way, she made her own choice. She knew Merlin was a good person, who didn’t dislike her because of the magic, and still threatened him throughout all season three, causing chaos and death because she craved power and she was in a privileged position where she could do all these things. We like to blame Merlin and Gaius for how she turned out, but what about Gwen? Poor woman didn’t do anything, as much as breathing too hard near her mistress, and Morgana wanted her dead because she hated the idea that a woman like Gwen, who even if amazing and with so many skills, was just a peasant, and could get on her throne. Morgana made the choice to hate Gwen. Morgana made the choice to try and kill Arthur to take her throne, even when Arthur had no idea of what was happening. Heavy on her throne, because who said it was? By age, status, whatever, Uther appointed Arthur as the heir, and there is no changing that. (so, bad Morgana. See? She had to be, like, it was the director’s job)

“Merlin poisoned her.” He did, and isn’t that magnificent? We can see how it destroys both of them in their own ways. Why did they have to be good characters? Imagine how boring the show would have been, and now I wouldn’t be making a post about it at ten in the evening. Morgana chose Morgause. There is no discussing that. As soon as she saw she could take Arthur’s throne, she started doing the evil smirk every two seconds, accuse Gwen of being a sorceress (shouldn’t she side with her own kind?), killing guards wherever she went, sneaking out with the clip, clap of her boots to make bad things, uh uh, in the woods, uh uh.

Third thing, Merlin tried, poor guy:

No, he is not perfect either, and I love it. He is a man who got appointed with this great job to do the right thing since he was a boy, and what did the lad do? Many wrong things, LMAO. And still, in his perspective, they were right. And we agree on most of them, don’t we? Everything because we’ve got his point of view. It was right for Merlin to try and kill a child, because of a prophecy; it was right to lie to Morgana, because she was upstanding, and he was just a peasant; it was right to free a dragon, and he was simply right on this one (yes, to me, there is no discussing this. I would have freed The Great Dragon too, and I cannot blame him for what he did after); it was right to poison Morgana; it was right for Merlin to follow Arthur everywhere and believe he was a good man despite everything, because the idiots loved one another more than they could hate the system they had been put in (spoiler alert, Arthur too has so many flows). Why listing all these things he thought were right? Because they were right to him, because we know his life, how much he had hurt, and how much death not only he saw, but also inflicted. And Morgana killed so many people too. She, multiple times, committed treason, and Merlin had enough information to know that she agreed to make Camelot sleep. Thinking only of saving Arthur and innocent people, he did what he thought was best (this is the same man who had already saved Morgana after he had already tried to kill her, because he tried with all his might not to be a killer, like he had said to the dragon long before), and poisoned her. Could there be an excuse for Mordred? I believe not, but Merlin believed there was, and that’s enough for him, for the audience, and that’s what makes him such a complicated and beautiful character. Merlin did help Morgana, even if he lied to her, and what if he didn’t? He could have got into so much more trouble, Gaius would have reproached him, Merlin believed neither Arthur or Camelot were ready to accept magic, or him, and Morgana, once finding out about the fact that he was Uther’s daughter, she would have probably still acted the same, because we later see that she didn’t want magic to not be outlawed anymore, but to simply, ehm, kill Arthur and everyone who got in her way.

Fourth thing, the other characters can be bad too:

Even if enchanted, Gwen did betray Arthur. (she is such a good character, and very kind, but I like when even the best ones do something bad). We know she is not guilty, but nobody knew, not even Merlin and Gaius, because they never found out she had been enchanted. And when she was evil, there are still consequences to the deaths she caused. Lancelot, even if a good man, and a good friend to Merlin, left before Gwen could decided if she wanted a relationship with him. Gwaine, who we love and adore, him too a complex character, didn’t think about it twice in kicking Merlin in the dungeons when Gwen, evil and enchanted, had accused him of treason. (yes, she is the queen, but Gwaine doesn’t seem the kind of character who would that, or maybe yes?) What about “you’re the only friend I have” and all that? Arthur still made prejudiced choices even when crowned king, and Merlin supported him, and we know why. Even bloody Sefa, manipulated by her father, decided to commit treason.

My point is, who wouldn’t have loved if things went differently, but at the same time, a TV show that is so perfect, with characters who cannot make a single bad thing, would have been still this enjoyable? Hell, that is the point of fiction, that is the point of writing, of directing. Even when we look at bad choices in a TV series, we try to understand why those things happened, why character A betrayed character B and the dominoes effect their relationship brought.

That’s what makes the TV show better. You can build things off bad things. You can make good fanfictions about what could have gone different. You can make theories debating whatever these choices were simply poorly made by the directors or made on purpose. You can discuss all day the relationships between the characters because they’re flowed, and sometimes even toxic.

That is the best part.

This is not to say that we cannot blame a character’s arc for something that happened, or try to redeem another character, instead, but it’s also good to be able to judge and point and write about it.

Even in this post I made points that I believe should be objective (siding with the oppressor, being an oppressor, not blaming a caged dragon for revenge, ecc.) and yet I still like the characters because I can blame them and talk about them exactly because they’re bad.

Moral of the story. A good story always has an antagonist. We shouldn’t delete that.

(and fuck you, Uther Pendragon)

See? Beautiful.

[via-the-cryptid]

one of you, I don’t remember who but if it was you then here you go, mentioned Ellie befriending Ace. it took me a minute to realise that you probably meant the psychic little girl and not the pirate, but… now that I think about it, that’s actually a really good idea.

first off, I’m going to start by saying that I barely remember anything about Ace except hat she was super psychic, scared the Joker shitless once (good for her), and I think ended up dying as a result of her powers overloading her brain. I also remember Batman stayed with her until she died, but past that, nothing! so if my interpretation of her is off, well, that ain’t Via’s problem.

picture this: Ellie, approximately 14 in physical terms, only been alive for like a year or two. it’s post-Portal Incident II: The Reckoning, so her body is stabilized but her powers are going bat-crazy. she’s alone in an unfamiliar city with far too many restless spirits, being chased by actual supervillains, and she’s scared. maybe she ducks into an alley or hides in an abandoned building, and maybe one of those spirits was watching.

it’s been a long time since anything has caught Ace’s attention in the mortal realm. she likes to check in from time to time, see what’s happening as the world moves on without her, but it’s useless to linger over what she can’t affect. in the end, it only ever makes her miserable.

but sometimes, she can’t help but watch. sometimes, like today, she sees another little girl in trouble. she thinks, ‘she’s like me’, and she needs to know that this girl makes it through the night. even if she doesn’t, Ace still has enough power in death to show her a good dream before another ghost is added to Gotham’s countless number of lost souls. she follows the girl into the building, watches as she curls up in the corner, out of sight and barely there.

and then she looks straight at Ace.

“Did you want something?” Ellie asks, and she doesn’t break eye contact with the spirit floating in the doorway, even as her eyes go wide. “If you have unfinished business, I might be able to help, y’know, so long as you’re not trying to cause trouble.”

“You can see me.”

“Sure can. Kinda hard not to, your outfit’s pretty distinct.”

It’s the outfit she died in. Ace doesn’t really want to wear it anymore, not when she’s so far removed from that era of her life, but it isn’t like she knows how to.

“So,” Ellie says, “what’s your deal? Are you just here to watch it are you picking a fight? ‘Cause I’ll warn you, I don’t know how to play poker and everyone else so far has refused to reach me.”

Ace blinks. “I’m not here to fight with you.”

“Okay, cool. Are you… here to fight someone else?”

“No. I was watching you.”

“Well, that’s a bit unsettling.”

“You were alone, and you looked cold. I had to make sure you weren’t going to die in here.”

“Again?” Mutters Ellie, and Ace’s expression snaps from intrigued to guarded in less than a second.

“What does that mean?” She asks, glaring right at Ellie, and the other girl grimaces.

“Did not mean to say that one out loud. Okay, so hi, I’m Ellie, and basically I’m dead—”

“What? No, you’re not. I would be able to tell if you were dead.”

“Half-dead, then. I was a clone OFA guy who was half human and half ghost, ‘cept I was falling apart, so I decided to fix it by doing the same thing he did to become half-ghost, and I ended up standing inside a portal to the Ghost Zone while it was opening. Make sense so far?”

Ace’s jaw is dropping, but she can’t seem to find it in herself to care. “Half-dead.”

“Oh, we’re still stuck on that, then. Basically, if you— actually never mind, I don’t really know how it works. I can turn from ghost to human, if that helps.”

“How?” Ace whispers. “You said you were… falling apart. And a clone. And half-dead.”

“Well, now I’ve got two out of those three, since I fixed the first problem. Do you want to maybe sit down or something? This is gonna be a long story if you want the whole thing.”

Yes, she absolutely does. Ace float across the room and settles in next to Ellie, folding her knees up to copy the other girl’s pose. “My name is Ace.”

“Nice to meet you, Ace. I’m Ellie. Wait, I think I said that already.”

Somewhere on the other side of Crime Alley, unknowing of the two girls hidden away in a long-forgotten corner, Edward Nygma slams his head down on the desk as he once again fails to pinpoint the location of the mysterious white-haired girl.

[karniss-bg3]

Salute, Larian Studios

Heya folks! It’s been a while, I hope everyone is doing well. I’m breaking my hiatus to discuss the recent announcement made by Larian Studios on their steam development blog. I will add the link here for those who wish to read the blog in its entirety but be warned, there are patch seven spoilers within. I wish to focus on a particular section in the final three paragraphs of the document, which reads as follows:

“Being given the chance to develop a game set in the Dungeons & Dragons universe has been a dream come true for all of us. But as Swen recently confirmed, we won't be introducing any major new narrative content to the story of Baldur's Gate 3 or its origin characters and companions, nor will we be making expansions or Baldur’s Gate 4. As an independent studio since 1996, we value the freedom to follow our creativity wherever it leads. In this case, after six years in the Forgotten Realms and much discussion and rumination, we’ve decided to seize this opportunity to develop our own IPs. We’re currently working on two new projects and we couldn’t be more excited about what the future has in store. It’s still early days - we’ll tell you more about those later down the line. But know that even as our focus turns to these new games, the sensibilities that brought you Baldur’s Gate 3 are alive and well here at the Larian castle. We’re fueled by the very same fire in our bellies, one that drives us to create immersive experiences shaped by your choices, and we can’t wait for you to join us on this next adventure.”

I will admit, when I first read this I felt a tinge of disappointment. As someone who had a lot of hope in seeing some stories continued, Kar’niss especially, this feels like the once open door is now sealed shut permanently. To be entirely fair, I always looked at an expanded Kar’niss story with skeptical optimism; hope for the best but expect the worst. After all, Kar’niss was designed as a throw away plot device that had no real bearing on the over-all narrative. Most of what has been derived of the character is entirely fan driven and not based on anything confirmed by Larian as a whole. Furthermore, there were many fan favorites that had a larger base than our dear drider and chances are even if Larian did decide to do an expansion, Kar’niss still wouldn’t make the cut.

With that said, I respect Larian in their choice. To expand on other characters would cost a lot of money and time. To juggle that alongside making new games would be unrealistic, and I understand their point of view completely. We also don’t know what is going on behind the scenes which could’ve influenced their choices all the more. Over all this situation mirrors the old saying, “Don’t cry because it’s over, be happy that it happened.” I am happy, and grateful. Without Baldur’s Gate 3 this blog wouldn’t exist. All of the amazing interactions I’ve had over several months would’ve never occurred, nor would I have found the courage to publicly publish stories to the internet. While I don’t consider myself an awful writer, I never believed my work was good enough for those outside of my personal circle. To say that my confidence has blossomed over the last few months is an understatement, and I owe that to the fantastic support of those in the fandom as well as those close to me. From the bottom of my heart, I thank you.

With Larian closing up the BG3 shop after the next few patches the question becomes, what’s next? For me, I don’t know. Sadly I’ve been swamped lately and it’s not destined to slow down until the middle of May. By then I hope to have a sufficient breather so I can return to projects I’ve left on the back burner in the interim. The Kar’niss blog will remain in place along with all of the archived stories, theories, and miscellaneous posts that are present. I still have a few writing requests that have waited a lot longer than I anticipated, so forgive me for the delay. I may also make a new blog that is dedicated solely to writing and other fandoms of interest. When the time comes I’ll post it here and folks can follow it if they wish but I’ll understand if not. Regardless of what the future holds, I am very stoked with the experiences I’ve had within the Baldur’s Gate 3 fandom. I’m a painfully shy individual and I am not a spotlight seeker by any stretch of the imagination. This section of the internet allowed me to expand my horizons a bit proving that you can indeed teach an old writer new tricks.

I look forward to seeing what is in store for Larian Studios. So long as they stick to their passion for making good games and treating their customers like people instead of money cows to be milked, then I will support every game release that comes in the future. While I’m sad that the many questions I had about Kar’niss will go unanswered, at least the drider will live on through the stories, art and other creative works made by his fans. In that way he is eternal, as are all of the other characters we’ve grown to love over this journey.

I hope to return on a more regular basis soon. Until then drider army, take care of yourselves and thank you for your continued support.

[chillerss]

Hey guys! I’m alive again! (shocker)

And I’ve been writing consistently again! (another shocker)

I kind of fell off in 2019 because I moved out west and ended up spending a ton of time outside. I hardly used my phone that whole summer, so when I tried to get back into writing by 2020, the writer’s block was heaaavy.

Recently I came back to writing reader inserts for Transformers again and I remembered how much I love it. For years I was posting everything on Quotev, but I’d really like to reach more people if it’s possible. This fic was my own escape from life and Bumblebee has always been my biggest comfort character, so I want to continue sharing it if others find some kind of comfort in it like I originally intended. That being said I’m going to continue posting on Quotev, but I’ll also be posting both stories here!

I’d love to continue the reboot of my first fic (based in TFA and sort of like an AU because instead of Sari, they find you) and the sequel fic (based in TFP). If you’re a Bumblebee lover like myself, I’d love it if you’d take a look! Feel free to check them out on Quotev, my user there is Bumblebutt. But PLEASE be aware that I wrote and finished IKYS specifically when I was like, 13 - 16 years old. It gets slightly better as you read, but overall it is still classic cringeworthy teenaged girl writing. Hence the rewrite.💀

Here are the blurbs for both fics!

₊ ⊹ 🐝 ⊹ ₊ I’ll Keep You Safe - TFA Bumblebee/fem!reader (currently rewriting) ₊ ⊹ 🐝 ⊹ ₊

Detroit was not where you wanted to move to, but it was now your only option after your grandmother’s passing. So you move in with your only living relative and soon come to find yourself infatuated with the team of giant alien robots protecting the city. They take a sudden interest in you too when their scout, Bumblebee, rescues you from a precarious incident and a close bond quickly forms between you and the young ‘Bot.

However, things take a turn when the Decepticons set their sights on you. So much so that they hire a bounty hunter to capture you alongside their efforts. Bumblebee would do anything to keep you safe, but he and the rest of his small Autobot team have their work cut out for them. His worst nightmare is failing to keep his promise to you—and with the way their circumstances keep getting tested—that just may be on his horizon.

₊ ⊹ 🐝 ⊹ ₊ Heart of His Spark - TFP Bumblebee/fem!reader (IKYS Sequel) ₊ ⊹ 🐝 ⊹ ₊

It’s been years since you last saw your best friend. You were thrown into witness protection after the Autobots’ departure and life had been so plain and simple ever since. The quiet peace was more than welcome, but the loneliness that accompanies it is almost unbearable at times. That is, until one random Wednesday afternoon when some kid from Nevada gives you a call.

Before you know it, you’re thrust back into life at his side again. The struggle of trying to balance your past trauma with what’s happening everyday in Cybertronian affairs has an iron grip on you. But Bumblebee now has two charges to look after, and you’re never going to let what happened to you, happen to these three kids—no matter what Bumblebee promises.

Go ahead and zip over to Quotev if you’d like, and thank you for reading! New chapters coming soon. :)

[dark-elf-writes]

Harry running to Japan because it is the safest place for him.

Kingsley watching this child who was melded into a soldier in the holding cell, holding his baby close to him, waiting for a trial after losing control. There is .very little chance of Harry getting out of this alive

(Someone tried to take his baby. What was he supposed to do? He doesn’t know.)

He makes a choice, and unlocks the cell. Harry runs.

Harry being broken into his apartment by Hermione and Ron, frantically packing his bags, and taking the portkey to Japan. There is no time for goodbyes.

Him running to the bad parts, so he doesn’t get discovered by the Japanese aurors, and having to fight to keep his kid alive.

He gets a job and food through shady back alley deals, and jobs willing to hire a 17 year old who hasn’t been to proper school since he was 10. One thing about quirks, there are so many people that drop out of school due to their quirk and go into the streets.

Sure they don’t really have a roof over their head some nights. Sure Teddy is wearing one diaper that Harry is just cleaning over and over again. But they have each other, and that’s enough.

Aizawa seeing this *kid*, whose quirk doesn’t stop with his, and his kid with the strongest quirk he ever seen on a newborn. He makes it his mission to get him into UA.

Namdnsnsnsnsbsbnssb screaming about this

Harry who was turned into a soldier, into a killer, when he was still young. Who took his first life at eleven and had to keep going. Who was famous for killing the same man twice. Who never had the space to process the blood on his hands much less get real help for it. His friends tried, the shattered little family they had built tried, but they were not trained professionals. Most of them had never heard of Post Traumatic Stress Disorder much less what it could do to someone, but still they tried.

But everyone knew Teddy Lupin was Harry’s whole world from the moment he had laid eyes on him after the battle. The entire wizarding world knew that Harry Potter, The Man Who Conquered, was fully devoted to his child in a way he had never been to anything else.

Still they were surprised to see what lines a trained killer would cross when they tried to take his world from him. The lengths he would go to save his child when from the age of eleven he had blood and ash on his hands.

Harry… didn’t remember much of the attack. Didn’t remember how his magic had burst from him the moment he felt someone try to take Teddy from him. Didn’t remember the second wave of power when the aurors tried to take him down and made the mistake of getting a bit too close to Teddy with their wands drawn.

He did remember waking up in the cell with Teddy still clutched in his arms and Kingsley looking at him through the bars.

“Minis-“

“I’m not here officially, Harry.” Kingsley cut him off with sorrow in his eyes. “I’m not here as an order member, either. I’m here as your friend.”

Harry didn’t understand at the time, but he didn’t step back when Kingsley unlocked the cell door. He trusted Kingsley. He wouldn’t hurt Teddy.

“Run fast and run far, Harry Potter,” Kingsley said the words like a prayer. “We never deserved you.”

And Harry ran.

He took the bag a tearful Hermione pressed into his hand, let Ron press a wet kiss to his forehead, and grabbed the portkey that would take him and Teddy far far away. He kept his head down and kept moving where he could. He barely slept. He stole and fought to make sure they had food. He took any job that would take him as long as he deemed it safe enough for Teddy to be around. He transfigured the same three pairs of clothes so no one questioned why they always wore the same thing.

He survived.

Alone. He was so alone other than Teddy, but his child was safe. And that was all that mattered really.

The vigilante justice thing hadn’t been a part of his plan. He couldn’t turn the saving people thing off even now. Merlin, it was probably worse now with how his magic writhed in him like a living thing. He couldn’t pretend not to see the crime around the when the very same could come to his and Teddy’s door. He had to protect his baby. Had to protect the last family he had. Anything to protect Teddy and help those who needed it.

That… didn’t mean he knew what to do when a vaguely familiar man (one of the local underground heroes?) started stalking him on his nightly patrols. With Teddy watched over by Kreature in whatever abandoned building the two of them had charmed into a house for the night Harry had started to go out lore and more. Needing to lose some the eager edge of his magic ever since the attack.

He knew even less of what to do when the man watched him, unblinking, as he set down a package of diapers (exactly the size Teddy was in now) before swinging up to the rooftops.

Harry took the diapers, barely acknowledged the eyes that followed him from whatever job would take him back home then out on his patrols, and kept moving.

“You never stop running, do you kid?” The hero asked one night when he found Harry poised on the edge of a rooftop, ready to apparate out in a moment’s notice.

“I can’t.” Harry said, hating how his voice cracked on the last word. “It’s all I know.”

The hero tipped his head to the side, watching, always watching behind those weird goggles. “I’m a teacher at UA.” Harry had heard of it. It was rather impossible not to. “We can protect you and the kid.”

Harry bared his teeth, his magic making both of their hair stand on end as it built between them. A warning. the calm before the storm. “I’ve heard that before. I won’t let you take him from me!”

“We’re not going to.” The hero didnt look away. Harry doubted he blinked. “I’ve seen how you are with them, kid. You’re a good parent in a bad situation, but someone will eventually try to take him if you keep on as you are.”

The snarl that ripped from Harry’s chest would have put Greyback to shame, but he didn’t attack, didn’t loose the leash he had on his magic. (He was a soldier. A killer. But he had rules. And the hero had helped them.) “He is my baby.”

The hero tipped his head in a nod. “Then protect him, kid. Give him a home and get a degree so you can get a real job to take care of him. Doesn’t he deserve better than this?”

Harry didn’t answer, instead disappearing with a crack loud enough that it set off a few car alarms, but he didn’t attack either.

Eraserhead took that as progress.

[kickthecan-revolution]

My sister flew down (again) to be with me during my oncologist and oncology surgeon appointments. When I picked her up at the airport, we started laughing, realizing we were basically wearing matching outfits - it’s the same exact thing that would happen when our mom and her sister Margie would fly to see each other, they would literally be wearing the same outfit when they stepped off the plane. What a thing.

My doctors are incredibly kind and they have confirmed that I have an excellent prognosis. I need one more MRI to make sure, but they think this is stage one a which is very very early and very curable. It’s a 97% survival rate, and 90% is the worst case scenario. I will need to have surgery, and then unfortunately a pretty intense round of chemotherapy, either three months or six months because the type of cancer I have attaches itself to a growth hormone, and that means it can grow aggressively and show up other parts of the body. But they continue to tell me that this is a speck of cancer, I caught it early, and I wouldn’t have to get chemotherapy at all had it not been HER2 positive thing. So I’m likely going to lose my hair and that’s really going to suck, but it’s so much better than losing my life. I’ll deal with it.

My first appointment yesterday was with the oncologist and she was so kind. I immediately felt these walls inside me I’ve built up to cope start crumbling a little. I looked at her and said I just want to live and she looked me straight in the eyes and she said “oh, you are going to live, who told you you are not going to survive this? You are absolutely going to survive this and be fine. This is a highly curable cancer and you caught it early.” I felt myself go black and my eyes rolled to the back of my head, all of the stress from my initial conversation with my primary care physician and his well-intended catastrophizing came to the surface, the terror of believing I was dying for two weeks and that I had done it to myself by neglecting getting mammograms for so long just came to a head. My face got super hot and I toppled. They grabbed me and I started to hyperventilate.

After it was over, she asked me all sorts of questions about what he had said, and told me that that if that initial news isn’t delivered with skill and care by an actual cancer expert, it is known to create post traumatic stress disorder, which I guess I have, every single time I see his name, i have a panic attack. I’m working through it, he’s a really good guy who was well intended, but as she said, “let’s just have the experts live in your head from now on, let’s make that agreement together. That was horrible to hear on top of the number of biopsies you had endure in such a short amount of time. I know you’re scared but no one could get through that who isn’t incredibly strong. This has been intense.”

I have a tentative surgery appointment second week of May but that’s assuming an MRI I get next week confirms what they’re seeing. So this is definitely a hurry up and then wait game but I feel like I’m in a really good hands , and knowing that the worst case scenario prognosis is 90% survival is incredible.

So two weeks ago, I had four likely malignant spots in both breasts, looking at a double mastectomy and a loss of my life – but all three out of four spots were benign, so now it’s just a lumpectomy and chemotherapy with some radiation.

All I feel is so grateful to be alive, I have neglected my health for a decade. I don’t have a primary care physician, I’ve not gotten a mammogram in years and years, so to have this reprieve with this aggressive of a cancer and still survive it is such a Grace. And I’m done punishing myself for that, the oncologist said we just don’t know when this showed up, it’s just one little mutation that could’ve happened a few months ago. The only thing that matters is, I caught it and I can fix it.

I applied for a leave of absence, my company is generally really good and very supportive of stepping away to take care of your health. It’ll be six months I’m gone, it’s going to take that long to get better. It’s going to be a powerful and humbling journey, and I’m going to come out of this stronger, clearer, and even happier than I was before. I know it.I claim it.

I’m not going anywhere, this is not the end of my life. It is the beginning of a new chapter in my one wild and precious life.

[childofthewolvess]

How do you work with your familiars/animal spirits? I'm really interested in it :3

Hey there! Thanks for the question!! I’m glad to hear someone is interested in working with familiars and animal spirits. I made an introductory post on what familiar spirits are and how to contract one here, but in this post I’ll quickly write out some ways that I work with my familiars!

“Work” can be a super versatile term. I’m not sure if you mean like the actual process of hearing and seeing my familiars or what it looks like in my craft so I’m going to cover all of the above!

How I work with my familiars and animal spirits!

I’ve been communicating with these two wolf spirits for pretty much my whole life. They started as spirit guides sent to me by my ancestors (or the black wolf spirit was sent; his mate followed him along in the astral). The two of them were living wolves that were domesticated by ancestors in Scandinavia, and after passing their spirits followed the ancestor who domesticated them; and were passed along to me, hundreds of years later. I was a child born with an incredibly, incredibly vivid imagination from the very start and my ancestors transferred their spirits to become my guides for my own protection and fascination in the occult! :)

When I was a kid, I worked with them by seeing their spirits follow me, seeing them in my dreams, praying for their protection, etc. I lost contact with them around age 15, and at that time I had a spirit guide instead sent by Loki to protect me in a different way than the wolves protect me. It’s a long story, but I was going through spiritual psychosis and intense trauma; because the two wolves are committed to protecting me and being truthful, at the time I unfortunately needed a spirit guide who would lie to me to keep me alive. I can go into this story at a different time if anyone is curious. Spirit work isn’t easy! My wolf familiars returned during my recovery when I was 17 and have been with me since. I contracted them for a life-long bond a couple months prior. So, I’ve been seeing these two for all but two years of my life, and I remember seeing them from as early as I can remember as well.

In my craft now, I work with my wolves in tonssss of different ways. Here’s a list!

Their primary purpose still stands - and that is spiritual protection! They are guardians protecting me from deceit or ill intention. Curiously enough, they also protect me from my overly active imagination and help to keep me grounded in my craft. They are sort of an “alarm system,” they are the first entities to notify me of attack or negative energy in the vicinity. But these two help to safeguard me in my craft, an as an auDHD individual with OCD, it’s also important for them to stick around and help shield from delusion in the spiritual realm.

In a more traditional aspect of familiars, I work with their energies in a lot of spellwork! I call them forward and their energies help to strengthen certain spells. Think of it like this - three sources of energy is more powerful than just one/my own. They’re amazing aid in strengthening spells! I have actually moved some of my energy in a relatively large ritual into an object in my room for them to “feed” off of/access, to help strengthen and manifest their own energies as spirits in my room and space.

Dream and astral work. My familiars follow me into my dreams, this is where I see their wolf forms and appearance the most, they also tend to accompany me in the space between sleep and awake. They help to ease nightmares from my PTSD and comfort me in times of distress, which often happens at night. They seem to be more active after dark, but also they might be because I hang out in my room which is where they linger.

In return, I have devoted my whole life to the wolf, pretty much. I’m a naturalist and environmental educator as well as an author. There is not a single tour, lecture, or book that I speak or write that does not help to teach about the wolf and how important they are to our ecosystems. I honor the wolf every day by spending my occupational time spreading the lessons of the wolf. This is a bigggg part of me working with them.

Divination. I have a couple of tarot decks dedicated to my familiars and their use. I allow them to send me messages and convey things that my deities want me to know. They are straightforward and true; if something from my God Squad is critical, the familiars are often tasked by my deities to convey the information to me.

Like they safeguard me, they also safeguard my service dog, who my wolves helped guide me to! Part of their souls each exist in my service dog, who is a physical companion, but I consider this as part of working with my familiars.

I can’t express enough of how intertwined these silly creatures are with my life and spiritual beliefs. I’m constantly wearing their anchor bracelet, or anointing myself every morning with their oil to honor them, or taking my wolf walker tincture to help connect my energy to them in my sleep and during meditation. They are so important to me that I’d venture to say they are the center of most of my craft.

At this time, these are the only two familiar/animal spirits I’m working with (unless you count Fenrir). In the past, I’ve worked closely with animal spirits in the form of spirit guides (stag, snow leopard, orcas… the list goes on), including being a communicator for animal spirits for other practitioners. I’ve considered doing this again, in fact. My spirit work is isolated to just animals and creatures, but I am very frequently sensing animal spirits and ghosts.

Hope this helps to answer your question!