#yeah i didn’t forget tumblr gods

[currentlyreadingawesomefanfics]

THE CHAPTER 10 DRAFT OF SOMNOLENT IS COMPLETE! I just need to edit everything and figure out if there’s anything else I want to add and then I’m done! Hopefully next week or sometime this weekend the new chapter will be out.

Current word count before editing: 2,519

[wosoragebaiter69]

tears streaming down your face

barça femeni x reader, lena oberdorf x reader

request: here

A/N: please tumblr gods, stop giving me sicknesses i write about in sickfics. i am TIRED.

also the the requester i changed it a lil bit - hope it makes you happy (do not ask how this would work, this is fiction. this does not make sense in any reality tbh)

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

As soon as you go down, you know what it is. The worst injury any footballer could imagine. Then, out of nowhere Lena Oberdorf (the defender marking you) can’t seem slow down and when she tries she trips over your good leg. Groaning as her knee hits the ground with a pop. Similar to yours.

Your faces are near each other, both silently empathising with each other when a rush of blaugrana swarms the area. Alexia sensing what your injury could be already.

“Is it?” She doesn’t want to say it, nobody ever wants to hear those letters.

“I think so, Ale I don’t want this please.” You sob, climbing into her lap.

“I know, I know. Deep breathes, you’ll get through this.” You do as told then you hear commotion to the right of you where Lena lays. You listen to the accented angry voices of Claudia and Patri.

“Ay, stop being dramatic. You literally tripped over her now you’re pretending to be hurt? Estúpida.”

“You are telling me you could not stop? Lies.”

As you’re about to tell them to stop, Wolfsburg players have shoved the spaniards away from their hurt teammate. Alex does the same with Lena as Alexia does to you.

Players around and above you are shoving each other and in your opinion it’s all too much. You’re overstimulated, in pain and all you want to do is cry. It seems Alexia notices this.

“Aye, Barça why don’t you be responsible and leave so that both medical teams can come over and do what’s needed for the players.” Her voice is her stern and the German captain agrees telling off her players as well.

When the crowd has gone, medical teams swarm and do the necessary on field tests, both ultimately asking for stretchers. Not a good sign.

You send a small sad smile to Obi, an understanding between you two. No bad blood or anything.

You part ways into seperate areas and get given the rundown. They suspect it’s the ACL, but scans will be needed to determine how bad it is and what type of surgery needs to be done.

You’re deflated, 9-10 months of recovery sounds horrific. They give you crutches, and put ice on your knee allowing you to watch the rest of the match in the stands. When you make it out, the young German is there as well, looking equally as tired.

“So, the three letters?” You ask, focusing on the match.

“Yeah, you?” You nod, sighing.

“It’s all apart of the game, it sucks that we have to miss so much though.”

“Yeah, it really does. Also before I forget, sorry. I didn’t mean to trip over you.”

“Hey, I know you didn’t. Maybe after our surgeries we could meet up sometime.” She stares at you.

“Would you come to Germany?”

“I’ve always loved Germany, it’s so nice there. So yes, I would.” Her eyes light up.

“So this hangout… is it like- a date orrr.” You laugh at her nervousness.

“Do you want it to be?”

“Yes.”

“Then it is, probably shouldn’t tell the teammates about this though. Not just yet, after nearly giving you another injury themselves.” You smile sadly at her, feeling guilty for your friends actions.

“Yeah, if I wasn’t in so much pain I probably would’ve yelled back. But you know I was also held down by a certain scary yet very nice woman.” You agree with that statement. Alexia is the same.

You both talk for the rest of the game and exchange numbers at the end with a promise to see each other soon.

- - - - -

You get confirmation of the rupture later that day, and told that in about a week you would go through surgery.

Alexia has essentially forced you to stay with her because she knows what it’s like and she knows the rabbit holes you could go in. She tries her hardest and you respect that.

She makes you come to training, not for you to watch them but for them to watch you. Jana stays with you in the gym working on her own recovery.

She makes jokes and makes the long week a bit easier, you’re also on your phone a lot. The others think it’s your way of distracting yourself… but it’s not particularly you that’s distracting yourself.

More like a certain Wolfsburg player.

Lena had been good, it was also confirmed for her and she had her surgery as soon as she was back in Germany.

Things were going well, and in 2 weeks there should be another game between your teams and in Germany. Which should be fun.

- - - - -

It’s the day after your ACL surgery, it went well and now you’re hobbling around sad, annoyed and in pain. Some of the team was at Alexia’s house trying to cheer you up but you didn’t even know what you wanted.

Out of nowhere Frido and Ingrid pull you up from the couch saying nothing other than.

“We’re taking her, bye!”

You follow them slowly into Frido’s car and sit in the backseat.

“What is it?” You ask the Scandi’s.

“Hmm don’t think we haven’t seen you messaging on your phone a lot. Do not forget we have also played at Wolfsburg.” Oh, they knew. Of course they did.

“So, tell us everything. Are you coming to Germany with us?” Ingrid asks after Fridolina.

“It was my plan, yes. Also, the thing with Lena is new. I just don’t want to mess up. I think my feelings are growing stronger so I want to do what’s right.”

“Ahh, young love.” The Norwegian says dramatically putting a hand to her chest.

“Ingrid didn’t you nearly go to jail for threatening a man trying to hit on your girlfriend.” Frido snickers at your comment.

“Frido, you are in love with a MAN. Please.” The silence is loud as you laugh at yourself.

“Kid I will murder you.” The blonde says.

“Nooo you’d have an angry German to deal with and their language is already angry enough. Then Ale would cook you.”

She hums in agreement, before conversation turns normal and light, filled with laughter.

- - - - -

You’re in the stadium waiting for the game to start, sitting next to Lena. Talk is small, about recovery and everything in between. It’s comforting to know that someone near you is also going through the same thing.

As the game progresses, so does your chatter. You make plans for afterwards, going to a small restaurant she liked.

By the end of the game, your hands are sealed together and as the final whistle blows, you kiss her cheek and walk to the field.

Maybe this journey for recovery won’t be so lonely.

—————————————————————————

i lost my first cricket match… this one girl can’t catch a ball and does nothing 💀 how is she on the team

also this won’t be a 2 parter because i have no motivation ❤️

[devildomwriter]

Obey Me As Tumblr #29

MC: I love bears they’re so fucking big and dumb

Leviathan: I thought you were a lesbian?

MC: I am talking about the animal!!!!!!!!!!!!

Satan: This is kind of the opposite of straight people forgetting gays exist

•

Beelzebub: *me inhaling pure Neon into my body by sucking it out of an ‘open’ sign at a store: Hhhhhhhhh

Satan: Wtf

Beelzebub: I felt I was pretty clear

•

Mammon: Guy about to invent mayonnaise: damn I wish this sandwich tasted bad :/

Solomon: Op’s never had pizza with mayonnaise

Mammon: OP’s never throttled someone to death with their bare hands either but unlike what you said, that can change any second

•

Asmodeus: When in doubt slap His ass

Simeon: His is capitalized….are you talking about god’s ass?

Mammon: Are you in doubt? Just slap His ass

•

Mammon: Not to sound like a dr*gon but I do want your gold and I am going to lay on top of it in a pile inside a cave

Diavolo: Why did you censor dragon?

Mammon: Townsfolk may find it scary

•

MC: Killed a spider n now I feel bad :/

Mammon: Give birth to a spider to make up for it

Mammon: Why did I say that?

MC: Why did you say that

•

Luke: Hey everyone it’s 5:30 pm

Solomon: It’s 8:24 where I am

Luke: I decide the rules

Mammon: Rules are more like guidelines, fool

•

Asmodeus: How sharp is your knife (flirting)

Solomon: Come find out (flirting intensifies)

•

Diavolo: When people start having long random conversations on my posts, my initial thought is “I’m glad these two are having a nice talk” but then I investigate further and almost 100% of the time they’re both horny and role playing historical figures

Diavolo: You all wish I was joking

•

Solomon: 2025 bullies be like “give me your lunch coins or I’ll unsub from your dad’s onlyfans”

Leviathan: Posts that can cause physic damage

•

Satan: I am sending pain vibes your way. You will feel a lil discomfort on your leg

Mammon: Ouch

Satan: Yeah

•

Luke: What happens when you become tumblr famous?

Leviathan: So much happens

Simeon: Like what?

Solomon: So much??? God did you even read the post

Leviathan: Get his ass

•

Simeon: The best fruits are hardest to open

Beelzebub: This fucking bowling ball is gonna be delicious I know it

•

Solomon: YMCA but instead of young man they say comrade and YMCA is USSR

MC: Comrade, steel production is down

Solomon: I said comrade, you must sleep on the ground

•

Diavolo: You think I have a choice? I have to be real

Mammon: This isolated message makes me feel like I’m about to be shot and killed

MC: This reminds me of grandma

Mammon: Hi! What does this mean?

•

Thirteen: God I wish there was a wasteland I could banish people to

Mammon: It’s the afterlife, sis

Thirteen: You’re right! I could simply murder and kill the people I don’t like! Why didn’t I think of this?

•

Mammon: Want a gf but I ain’t prepared… I’ve not land to give, no cattle…

Last • Next

[nats-revival]

𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙣𝙚𝙜𝙤𝙩𝙞𝙖𝙩𝙤𝙧𝙨 𝙢𝙪𝙨𝙚 | 𝙚. 𝙬𝙞𝙡𝙡𝙞𝙖𝙢𝙨

pairing: nepo baby!business owner!ellie williams x afab!business owner!reader

tags: smut, fingering (r receiving), pet names/name calling?? (dirty girl, pretty, good girl, baby), slight praise??, god why is tagging so hard, mild language, unethical business practices??, thoughts are green, ellie lowk an asshole, but both reader and ellie are pretty harsh to eachother, maybe that’s it, bare with me if i forget something pls. 😭🙏

a/n: i wrote this directly on tumblr bc i did NAWT feel like pulling up google docs today saur the format might be a lil off. i was watching this show on netflix called ‘locked up’, and like an episode from season two is what inspired this!!! 😜 the show is good honestly it just drags on sometimes!!! ive actually never actually written smut any times before this (believe it or not hehe) anyways, let’s get into it!!!

P.S - DEDICATED TO @sweetysaccharine YAWP YAWP!!!! <333 HOPE U ENJOY POOKIEEEE

P.P.S - don’t look at the typos or i will find you (IM JOKING)

rumors traveled fast, and sometimes it wasn’t always good. for one, they could be infuriating. a company you’d been toe to toe with for.. quite some time had gotten a new ceo. some young girl. articles appeared online about some kinda nepotism scandal. the photo on the top of the article displayed a photo of the previous ceo — joel miller, and the new owner, ellie. they looked happy. but why were they accused of something as harmful as nepotism? long story short, joel turned his brother down for the position (even though he was the better option) so ellie could have it. favoritism of sorts. but god was she infuriating! her stupid, flashy displays of wealth (that probably didn’t even belong to her) made you so mad! and also, her arrogance and her constant need to compete with you was very infuriating aswell. you had influence, she had money. wouldn’t these things be considered as a double kill in some perfect world? yes. would you ever even consider working with someone like her? absolutely not. you couldn’t even stand being in the same vicinity as her whenever you two ended up at the same social events.

imagine that terrible, ugly feeling of anger that coursed hot through your veins once finding out she’d brought possibly one of the biggest clients you could’ve ever had. it was one thing for her to shove it in your face that she was wealthy but this? she’d completely overstepped. storming your way through the companies large building, you find yourself at her offices door knocking like a madwoman. “open the goddamn door, williams!” you yell as you attempt to open the door on your own. she doesn’t say anything, but you’re just almost certain she’s smirking or something. she opens the door with this.. look. it was weird. a perfect mixture of condescending, arrogance, and ‘i know what i did and i don’t regret it’. “are you insane?” “mm.. yeah. i guess so.” you laugh, dumbfounded by her. “how bout you come into my office for a seat and a drink?” she asked with a raised eyebrow. “let’s handle this civilly, shall we? knowing you, i have the feeling that this could get real ugly.” she pushed open the door with that same condescending/arrogant smile. of course, reluctantly, you walk inside. maybe this could be resolved civilly.

the sound of some smooth music played. it sounded like micheal buble or something. she walks around her desk to pour you a glass of bourbon. she hands it to and you just hold it. “it’s not poisoned, see?” she says before taking a sip. you take a sip and of it before putting the glass on her desk. “so, i realized that.. i have something you want.” the something being that client. “why else would i be here? that was a really petty move and you know that.” she chuckled. “yknow, i could just.. refer them back to you.” initially, you’re in disbelief. ellie? being generous? no way. she must’ve completely lost it. “but! it comes with a price.” of course it does. nothing was free, not in this economy. you kept your expectations low for this very reason. you raise an eyebrow at her. “we could work together. become business partners.”

she turns her music up a little. she dances her way over to you, circling you a bit. “no chance, ellie. how could i ever work with someone like you?” she chuckled again. “why wouldn’t you work with ‘someone like me’? you have something that i want aswell.” “what?” “power. influence. however you may wanna word it. i admire that.” it had to be some sick joke. why would she wanna work with you? “shouldn’t all your daddys money be more than enough to keep you in a position of power?” you quarry, then crossing your arms. a part of you didn’t believe that she’d been the one asking you for help.

“just think about it. me, giving you money. you, drawing power hungry clients in with that pretty face of yours. we’d work together like yin and yang.” she proposed before taking another sip of the drink in her glass. that was her giving a go at an analogy. was it good? she didn’t know. did she care? not at all. “you bullshitting me, williams?” “not at all. all you gotta do.. is say ‘yes’. cmon.” she offers her hand, those pretty slender fingers and that tattoo that peeking from underneath that black button up shirt were just so.. enticing. you were in your head, just thinking. was this a good idea? could i trust her? she probably has bad intentions. but she was so tempting. this had to be one of the seven deadly sins or something.

she snaps infront of your face. “where’d you go?” she asks. “nowhere.” you respond quickly. “so, you taking the offer or not? or.. will i have to convince you?” she takes a step closer to you. temptation taints your brain.

you’re not in control of your thoughts anymore. ellie was.

her hand seeks solace on your waist. “shouldn’t finding business like this be considered illegal?” you whisper to her. “im not a law abiding woman. and quite frankly, i don’t give two shits.” maybe it wouldn’t be illegal if nobody knew. but all you thought about was her. how she smells. how she’s looking at you. how her hands feel on your body. you can’t stop yourself. your lips crash down onto hers. your fingers tangle in her auburn hair as the both of you kiss passionately. she brings you to her desk, knocking stuff over as she sat you on her desk.

glass shattered, pictures were knocked out of their frames, and her computer mouse was.. somewhere. your back arches into her touch as you let out a soft moan into her mouth. she takes the opportunity to slide her tongue into your mouth. in the competition of dominance between your tongues, she reigns supreme. her hands slide up your body and end up on your oxford button up shirt. she doesn’t unbutton it, she rips that shit open. “i’ll get you a new one.” she mumbled as the buttons from the shirt scatter across the room.

“you’d better. or else id have to come back here and get it by force.” “oh please, you’ll be back here for more reasons than a goddamn shirt.” she said as she peppers kisses down to your jawline, then your neck. “don’t leave any marks.” “but why?” “oh, i dunno, cause i don’t want anyone asking me who i had sex with?” “who gives a shit? your workers get paid to look the other way, don’t they?”

well, she makes a good point. and you can’t argue with a point as valid as that. she sinks her teeth into a sweet spot of your neck, making you moan out as she runs her tongue along the new mark. she sticks her tongue out again to run it all the way down to one of your boobs. the sensation makes you shiver. “wore this pretty bra for me, didntcha? you were just expecting this. you must’ve wanted me to touch you like this, didn’t you? dirty girl. must’ve been waiting for me to bend you over this table.” she rambled all while stripping you of your bra, then leaving soft kisses and licks across the valley of your breasts.

she takes her time, making you wait for it. she knew what she was doing to you, and she was going to make you wait. “ellie, you’re going soo slow! you know what i want.” you whine as she leaves kisses and bites all over your exposed skin. “tell me what you want or you’ll get nothing. tell me where you want me.” she whispered. “i want your fingers.” “where?” “you know where.” “tell me or you get nothing.” you hesitate for a moment before saying feebly. “in.. in my pussy..” “that’s a good girl.”

she smiles as she pushes her hands into your slacks. she could feel your wetness. “i got you this worked up, huh? who knew little miss perfect could get this wet over me, a ‘nepo baby’?” she teased with a cocky smile. she slowly slides your slacks and underwear all the way down to your ankles before she applies a delicious amount of pressure to your clit. you gasp, your hand wrapping around her wrist. “oh, you like that do you, huh? you want more? fucking beg for it. cmon.” she applies more pressure to your clit, rubbing small and soft circles as her fingers ghost your sopping entrance. “oh— please ellie, i need more. give me more.” “gonna take more than that, baby.” you whine when she suddenly takes all that pressure away from you.

you let out another whine as you attempt to rut against her hand. her free hand slaps your thigh as she shakes her head in disapproval. “none of that. keep still. you get nothing until you beg like a good girl.” “please, please. ill do anything. just please touch me.” she chuckles at you. she found it cute how you were so desperate to chase that pleasure. “god, you’re so desperate. you need it so.. goddamn bad, don’t you?” she lets out a grunt in the middle of her sentence as she suddenly plunged into your pussy.

as she moves her fingers, she groans at how wet her you were. first she starts with middle finger, then adding her ring finger. her long fingers are hitting that sweet spot in you. she was making you see stars. “listen to yourself. look at ‘er, she’s crying for me.” she coos as she speeds her pace. you moan out. “watch me, baby.” you slowly look down at her fingers plunging in and out of you. sounds of wet squelching fill your ears. you bite your lip and you toss your head back as you let out a moan. you grind yourself down onto her fingers, chasing that wonderful and blissful orgasm.

you felt a pressure building up in your stomach. your eyes were fluttering open and shut. everytime you looked away, she stopped. you made sure to not look away. once that pressure in your stomach felt like it was gonna release, your moans became more broken. “ellie! ellie— oh fuck! ellie! im gonna cum! don’t stop, please don’t stop!” you say between moans as you bring your hand back down to hold her wrist in place.

“oh yeah? gonna cum? let go for me. make a mess on my fingers. cmon. i know you can do it.” she said as she kept her pace at that same one that was making you see stars. she’d been rambling something to you, talking you through it as she watched you cum all over her fingers. she helps you ride out your orgasm, a slight tremble in your legs becoming more apparent.

“what do we say?” “thank you.” she smiled as she pulled her fingers out. the sudden loss makes you whine. she sucks her fingers clean and you watch as her tongue runs across the length of her fingers. “still being a tease, williams?” you ask as you look at her while she does it. “mm.. well no, i dont think so. just savouring how good you taste.” when she was finally satisfied, she drops her hands. “so, you finally ready to stop being so stubborn and take the deal?” “not a chance if it means we get to have sex like this.” you respond with a chuckle. “maybe you need to be fucked again, hm?” she ask with a smile.

needless to say, you’d went another time, and on the third you fucked ellie. eventually you come to some sort of agreement after you’d been laid on her leather sofa, naked and feeling like you were floating. the only question you had now is what the hell had you gotten into. “will this turn into a scandal?” you ask. “.. probably not if we keep this under wraps.” she responds as she puts her head in the crook of your neck, pressing soft kisses to it. “plus, yknow i can just pay the media off right? they won’t say anything. not a peep.” she reassured as she smiled softly.

[moonydoodlez]

eddie eating literally any vegetable for once and exploding

-🕸️

I'm Dying

Pairing: Eddie x F!reader

Warnings: eddie being dramatic

Word count: 383

Note: i was going thru my drafts on tumblr and found this so enjoy ig :)

“Sit down for a minute wont ya” You laugh as Eddie continuously walks around the kitchen whilst you try to cook dinner for the two of you. 

Of course he didn’t listen and continued pacing around as he watched you. He was rambling on about god knows what, you had lost track a while ago.

“How about you be a taste tester?” You asked spinning around to face him. This clearly got his attention because he was now standing right in front of you. 

He watched you carefully dip the spoon into the stew. “Blow” You demanded as his eyes widened looking down at you suggestively. You rolled your eyes moving some of the curls out of his face before aggressively sticking the spoon into his mouth. 

His face distorted into disgust as he looked down at you trying not to say anything. “Oh yeah, very good,” he says, clearly lying. “Did you forget I hate broccoli?” He asks dramatically, clutching his heart. “Oh how could the women I love forget” He declares spinning around. 

You shake your head at his antics. “I didn't forget.. I added them so you don't die. You need to eat your veggies”.

He glared at you shaking his head. Again you stood there silently as he clutched his heart. “Oh god” He groaned as he fell to the floor. “You've killed me.. You finally have killed me” He says flailing around before not moving anymore and his whole body went limp. 

After a few minutes he rose from the dead. “I just died and you just watched” He pouted sitting on the floor. “You watched the love of your life die and you don’t care” He continues. 

“It’s almost like I can still hear him” You joked wiping away fake tears as you stirred the food before turning off the stove to let it cool.

One minute you were standing and the next you weren’t. He grabbed your hips and pulled you onto the floor and sat you on his lap. “The food really was good though” he explained before leaving a kiss on your lips. The taste of mint gum and cigarettes taking over your mouth.

“I know.. I am an amazing cook” You joke before wrapping your arms around his neck and kissing him slowly.

Masterlist Eddie Masterlist

[nerd-at-sea5]

i keep seeing sm anti percabeth (idk how i am very pro percabeth tumblr what are you doing) and like. i feel like a large amount of people forget that they are both massively traumatized kids/teenagers who are in their first and only relationship.

they’re gonna fuck up, they’re gonna be a little toxic, but overall they’re is so much communication and time and like. life that we DONT see.

percy is also an unreliable narrator (no hate but he is), he’s sarcastic and sometimes people don’t pick up on his sarcasm. he insults himself a lot and he really does see some things with rose colored glasses

annabeth and him were also friends first, so a lot of how they behave is very friend-like. the teasing of being smart (god knows my friend and i tease each other religiously for being smart or not smart). honestly the judo flip as well (can’t tell you how many times my friends and i have thrown punches at one another and before you say ‘yes well he’s an abuse victim! so it’s different!!’ yeah, so are some of my friend and so am i. we’ve talked about it, and don’t step out of line) communication is important kids!! (so is consent!!!! had to throw that in there)

we didn’t see them talk about it! they 100% did, why else would annabeth be comfortable enough doing it?

anyway i know this is a long ass rant, i’m just mildly annoyed that people think these traumatized kids with absolutely no therapy experience whatsoever are going to be 110% perfect 24/7, like yeah they’re a great relationship but hey, they’ve still fucked up. we all have

* also ik i didn’t go into every single minor detail. i am not that focused. i’ve got adhd and it’s vacation so fuck that. i also haven’t reread in a while (rlly into fantasy right now) so…..sue me 🤷

[diqnbaus]

Let You Break My Heart Again

Pairing: Miles Morales x spider person reader

Summary: Takes place after ITSV but before ATSV. You and Miles had a plan to meet up but he blows you off so you confront him and you two fight.

Category: Angst

A/N: Yall I’ve never written fanfics before so pls don’t bully me. I also have no clue how to use Tumblr so pray for me.

One hour and fifty-three minutes. You waited one hour and fifty-three minutes for Miles on top of a building, in the cold weather, freezing. Only after that one hour and fifty-three minutes did you realize that he wasn’t coming.

‘What if something happened? What if the police scanner hadn’t picked up there was an accident yet? What if he’s hurt?’ You thought to yourself while pacing the roof.

You then decided the best option was to literally swing by his house and check on him.

Climbing over to his window, you peeked inside quickly to make sure it was clear to get a full look. But when you did, you saw Miles at his desk drawing in his notebook with his headphones on.

He caught the movement from the window and jumped when he saw you.

“God y/n, you scared me,” he said while opening his window to let you in.

“I scared you? Miles, I waited almost two hours for you. I thought something bad happened,” you all but yell, while taking your mask off and slipping into his room.

“Shit. Y/n Im so sorry. It totally slipped my mind.”

“I reminded you twice today at school.”

“I know and I’m sorry, I’ve just had a lot on my mind,” Miles explains while walking over to his bed and sitting.

“Like what? What were you doing that made you completely forget about me?” You ask, annoyed.

“I didn’t realize I had to tell you everything about my life now.”

“Miles. What where you doing?”

“..Drawing,” he says sheepishly, like he knows he’s been caught.

You decide not to respond, instead walking over to his notebook he had been working on and picking it up.

“Hey! Wait-“ He gets up and yells as he tries to get the book from you, but you interrupt him by putting a hand up.

Your heart drops into your stomach at the drawings inside. It’s all Gwen. You swallow the lump in your throat before speaking.

“I’m sorry that I’m not her.”

“This isn’t about Gwen, y/n.”

“Of course it’s about Gwen! Everything with you is about Gwen. You’re so goddamn obsessed with her that you can’t even spare me a text to tell me you’re blowing me off!”

“That’s not true! I swear, I just forgot. This has nothing to do with her. I was just-“

“Oh yeah, I remember now. You forgot because you were too busy drawing Gwen! God, she’s even all you draw,” you flip to another page of his notebook “Gwen,” another page, “Gwen.” More pages, “Gwen, Gwen, you and Gwen, Gwen, Gwen!” You yell flipping through the pages before giving up and shutting the book.

“What about me?” You ask, barely above a whisper.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t realize you cared about being drawn so much,” Miles scoffs.

“Miles this isn’t about the drawings!” You shout.

“Then what is it about?!”

“It’s because-“ you cut yourself off. ‘It’s because I like you. Like-like you and you’re obsessed with Gwen the way I wish you were obsessed with me,’ is what you wish you could say.

Instead you look at him. He looks back, like he’s waiting for you to say something. Like he knows what you’re thinking and is just waiting for you to say it.

You sigh and put your mask back on while walking towards the window, “You’re right Miles. I’ll try not to care so much anymore.”

Slipping out the window and swinging away, you faintly hear Miles calling out to you, but you didn’t feel like talking anymore. The lump in your throat felt like it was drowning you and the headache from the unshed-tears felt like it could kill you.

Another a/n: I love Gwen I swear please forgive me.

[pixeechix21]

It's been so long

Summary: Keegan is ur brother’s best friend; returned from deployment. u’ve broken up with ur ex and u haven’t been able to come in so long, late at night forbidden feelings arise and it can’t be helped that u act upon ur longed desires.

TW: smut, sex, very minor vulgarity, praise (kinda), forbidden, teasing, creampi

note: i'm sorry about the writing the original sucked I wrote another, then tumblr wasn't working so now I got this. I gave up lmao

Plz leave comments about what u want more of, opinions n wt ever are welcomed 🥰🙈🥳

It’d been weeks- months, since someone made u come, it's been itching at u for so long that even trying to use ur fingers or don't work. Frustrated, u huff out and go to the kitchen searching for any pie left over. It looks like he has already beat you to it. Eating a full plate of pie and whipped cream, u clear ur throat. “Didn’t expect company, u want some?” Keegan offers. u come up to the island n hop on the counter. “Yes please,” u thought he’d get u a new plate but instead he ladles a fork and moves it in ur direction, “Open ur mouth then, I don’t have cooties,” he joked. you open your mouth obediently and pull away. He stares at your lips as you do this and he can’t help but imagine it being his dick. The blood rushes to his cock at the mere idea, he tries to make it less obvious in his gray sweats. A small amount of whipped cream remains on the side of ur mouth, his hand absentmindedly goes to wipe it away. Looking into his eyes u take his finger into your mouth and suck it clean, u can hear him as he inhales eyes widening before they darken. “We really shouldn’t, '' he whispers.

 “Please, it's been so long,” u beg, running your hands up his body. His eyes follow a path down from ur eyes to ur lips. He bites him down trying to keep himself from doing something he’d never be able to get back from. “I want to y/n, but he’d never forgive us,” he whimpered as u kiss him lightly massaging the back of his neck. “Forget about him. I need u right now,” u lick up his neck to his mouth. He wants you too, so bad that his hardon is aching. He can’t let you go unsatisfied. He groans, giving dives into our mouth. ur panting and whimpering as his hands feel across your body then resting on ur waist. He whispers, “fuck,” as u grind into him. He becomes possessed, hurling u up so that ur legs wrap around himHis cock pushes up into u as u grind“Fuck fuck-u- y/n u need to god just like-” he moans. u pick up your pace, ur climax finally building up. “Wait, please,” he sets you down on the couch. 

Biting down ur lips as u see his large bulge. “Clothes off,” he says as he takes off his own clothes. u hurriedly take it off, not wasting any time he’s on top of u. Biting u, gripping u trying to pull u closer to him. He twists and sucks ur hard nipples as he finger fucks u. u squeeze ur eyes shut, letting him. “u feel so good around my fingers. Look at u wanting to come to just from me finger fucking ur needy little pussy,” u arch ur back. “u want my big fat cock in u? Huh, yeah,” u stifle a moan as he removes his fingers and places himself at ur entrance. Stroking the tip up and down ur wet slit. It’d been so long since he’d fucked someone, he’s losing his mind as he watches him slowly enter u. “u’re cunt’s so fucking tight,” he bites out dropping his head as he pauses to breathe once he’s all the way in. 

u clench around him, “stop if u continue tonight isn’t gonna last long,” he groans. u feel his abs tense as he tries not to bust early. “Stop it’s killing me,” he grabs ur throat n digs into ur hips to stop ur movements. He’s a different person, he’s fucking u so hard now. you're clenching around as u come at the sheer force of him. His incoherent speech is muffled in ur ear as he bruises ur neck and hips from where he’s holding on. “This dick is all urs, fucking come on it,” he circles ur clit viciously overstimulating clit throbbing blindingly as u shake under him. Teary u moan out his name as he fills u. ur juices cover his shaft as he pulls out. “No more. Keegan,” u whine. It’d been a long time, too long, and u didn’t want this to stop just yet. “Look at u, you're shaking, did Joshua really not know how to treat a lady?” Keegan mocks kneading ur breast. “you're not half the man that he is,” you admit, sitting up u push him down to lie down. “Say that again,” he hums, devouring every inch of ur body as he watches u crawl on top of him. “He hasn’t made me come half as many times as u. Now shut up and kiss me,” he bites your lips and tongues u, taking away any air u had. u start to bounce on his dick, “my dick is urs y/n,” he sighs out. u ride him faster, stretching around his cock. Just as u go harder his body bucks, “oh fuck u know how to fuck me- so needy- all this dick in u-,” he sputters finally coming so strong that his eyes roll to the back of his head and he fucks u meeting each of ur movements. u feel him fill u up and u can’t help but smile at how perfectly he fits in u. “Such a dirty little slut," he says, juices and his come glistening between your thighs.

[hailqiqi]

Done Right, in the Proper Place

In memory of Quil Appreciation Weekend...! I keep forgetting to post my fics to tumblr, which is very terrible of me. This fic is my Garden Party gift for @xluminaheart

Words: 3,319

Read in full below or on AO3 here

>>>>>>>>>⚔︎

It was almost funny, really, how quickly hope died. One minute you’d be full of zest, raring to take on the next big challenge after surviving the odds – top of the world, invincible. The next you were gazing at your own blood, transfixed by the way flesh is actually layered like it is in the first aid books and oh, that couldn’t be a good sign, could it?

It wasn’t, it couldn’t be. And unless – probably, even if – there was a first aid kit somewhere in this godforsaken hellhole, there wasn’t anything that could be done about it.

His exposed flesh glistened darkly, almost ominously. It’s me, it seemed to say. I’m the reason you were finally so useful. I’ve been here all along.

Right then. He released the fabric, letting the feathers fall back into place and hide it all from view. Lucy’s gaze was still on him, but hell if he knew what to say.

Sometimes she walks too close to the grave, Lockwood had once said. And now here she stood in front of him, her boots covered in ice, his very own angel of death.

‘Well,’ he said, finally. ‘That’s a mess.’

‘Oh, Quill…’ she said, her voice thick. Steam rose from her shuffling feet, and ice cracked on the hem of her feathered cape. He couldn’t look her in the eye.

They’d come so far in the last 24 hours, and he’d seen her pushed to the brink of exhaustion, far beyond the point where good agents gave up. And he’d been the one to keep her going. He’d been the one to keep them all going. The way out was behind him, they’d made it – he’d made it – and in a moment he’d step through, and then what?

Then what?

‘Typical,’ he spat. ‘And I was feeling so chipper.’

‘Listen,’ Lucy said. ‘Maybe you’d better stay here.’

He looked up sharply. ‘What, on my own? See you all go through without me? Leave me standing here like a pillock in the dark?’ Maybe she was comfortable in the quiet darkness, but Quill couldn’t think of a worse place to die. ‘I don’t think so.’

She had the audacity to look surprised. ‘But, Quill, that wound…On the other side…’

Her voice trailed off, and he took a deep breath, feeling his lungs expand along with his traitorous sides. ‘I know,’ he said. ‘Maybe.’ Probably. ‘But if it happens, it’s got to be done right, in the proper place.’

Somewhere with light, somewhere with people. The thought of dying alone – or living alone forever in this silent half-world, where the walls were all just out-of-true and everything glittered with frost – made fear claw at him, its icy grip digging into the skin of his throat despite the cape.

No. He would not die here.

‘Anyway…’ He grimaced as Lucy gazed at him, her eyes wet. ‘I’m not staying here. Especially in this stupid outfit.’ She didn’t smile. ‘Now – we need to go through.’

Lucy didn’t move. She stood there, her tall figure both so at home and so out of place in that cold, grey room, and suddenly she looked so young. He wanted to tell her it would be all right, but part of him wanted her to tell him it would be all right – and they both knew the words would be empty. There wasn’t much to say, anyway; sometimes, things happened, and now, finally, it was Quill’s turn.

Summoning all his strength, he’d just moved to turn when she spoke again. ‘Quill…You were brilliant just now.’

He paused. ‘Yeah.’

She swallowed, considering her words, and oh God, he couldn’t do this. If Quill was about to face his death he was going to face it with his head held high and his eyes dry, and that meant nipping this in the bud before she got going.

‘Without you—’

‘You and Tony and the others would never have made it, would you?’ He grinned. ‘Glad I made a contribution.’

‘Oh, God,’ she said and really, that said it all, didn’t it?

He held out his hand. ‘It’s OK. Take my hand, Lucy, and let’s go.’

She closed her eyes briefly, breathing deeply through her nose. Then she met his gaze and took his hand.

Together they walked over the narrow little bridge back towards life. The irony of the dead creating a path back to life was not lost on him, nor was the irony that this path back to the living world would lead to his own death. It was poetic, even, one might say.

The ghosts around them swirled and screamed, the noise drowning out the sound of their footsteps on the iron bridge. The air was freezing cold, but Lucy’s hand was warm in his, her presence a quiet comfort.

Quill had held Ned’s hand as he died. A cry of dismay had been all the warning Quill had had before Ned fell to the floor, writhing and gasping as his skin turned blue. Kate and Bobby had held the Spectre at bay and Quill, in his dull blindness, had only been able to hold Ned’s hand.

He’d emptied three vials of adrenaline into Ned’s thigh, of course, but the Spectre had been malicious and hungry and Quill had long ago learnt that if a ghost truly wanted you dead, even the faintest touch was as good as a bullet to the heart. The adrenaline had been as useless at saving him as Quill had been at keeping him safe, but he liked to think he’d at least managed to provide some comfort, in those final moments.

They were passing through the centre now. Bright neon lights suddenly shone ahead and pain bloomed from the wound in his side, making his head spin. He gripped Lucy’s hand tightly and focused on putting one foot in front of the other. She gripped his hand back.

Lucy – God, Lucy. He’d never felt so grateful for Lucy. She was meant to come last, he had been meant to protect her from whatever could be waiting for them on the other side. He’d managed to protect her from Gale, at least. Lockwood would surely forgive him for being more burden than shield now.

His steps were heavy, each one feeling more and more impossible as they slowly emerged from the vortex. The lights on this side were bright and his senses all rushed back at once, overwhelming in their enormity; but Quill was already disorientated, his vision blurry, his breaths coming in small gasps as his whole body seemed to burst into flame. His head was held high, he was sure, and he tried to grip Lucy’s hand tighter as he went to take that final step. Then it all went black.

⚔︎

Of course, it hadn’t stayed black. Quill had woken back up to the sounds of Lucy – sweet, hard as nails, fiercely loving Lucy – gearing up to deliver his eulogy. At least she had sounded suitably tearful. He’d put a stop to that right quick, though, because there are some things one just doesn’t need to hear.

His memory of the night was surprisingly clear, and he had a good recall of everything that had happened right up until the paramedics shot him up with the good stuff while loading him into an ambulance. His agents had bundled him onto a trolley and taken the lift, like a group of grisly couriers. They’d been wheeling him towards the front doors when Sir Rupert had appeared with an army of thugs, and from then on it was a discombobulating haze of screaming, pain, smoke, and crashing as they careened around the Hall and (eventually) out onto the Strand. Quill had been given today’s paper earlier, and apparently the Hall and most of the building had been completely destroyed with over fifty dead. Quite impressive for a day’s work, really.

(He’d been trying not to think about which of the dead he might know. Most of his Fittes contacts had cut him off, anyway.)

None of that, however, was what had been on repeat in his head all day as he lay in his hospital bed at St. Mary’s. Instead his thoughts kept pinging back to those moments when he first woke up on that hard, tiled floor, to the sound of Lucy’s tearful voice. George’s hand had been in his, his grip tight and warm and unyielding. Holly had been covered in his blood, a testament to how hard she’d worked to save him. And Lockwood’s coat – the coat that had formed a huge part of his new identity – had been in tatters, wrapped around him in a makeshift bandage, and then used to keep him warm (and hide the contraband that George had insisted upon. Quill had taught him well). Maybe it was stupid – and, frankly, embarrassingly sentimental – but Quill had never felt more loved.

A little over fifteen hours later, and Quill was wondering if he’d imagined it. Afternoon sunlight streamed in through the window, the sky outside was a deep, brilliant blue, but Quill felt a very different kind of blue indeed. Where the fuck were they? He’d been awake for four hours; nobody had called, nobody had visited, nobody had checked in. It’s like they’d all forgotten about him.

The unfairness of it rankled. He was only in the bloody hospital because he’d gone to protect those idiots in the first place. And after everything he did to get them through Dark London, you’d think he would at least have been worth a phone call.

What he tried to avoid thinking about was: perhaps they hadn’t called because they couldn’t. He’d given the nurses the number for Portland Row, but it had been disconnected. They’d left two messages for Barnes, but declined to leave a third, instead telling him to ‘Calm down and get some rest’ – a task that felt impossible when the last thing he remembered, as the drugs hit and the doors shut, was the sound of Lockwood losing his mind over Lucy being missing.

Quill had no doubt he’d have left to find her. Holly would have stayed with George, surely, but Lockwood would have gone to get her. Did he ever find her? If he’d had to go back inside, did they make it back out? Quill had no idea.

The paper spread over his lap was crumpled from the way he’d obsessively combed through every word, looking for clues, hoping they weren’t among the unnamed dead. But there’d been no mention of any of them.

The front page was filled with an image of black soot and towering flames against a pre-dawn sky, all angry reds and dirty blacks against the soft indigo emblazoned with the words FITTES FALLS. It was horribly reminiscent of the first time he’d seen Lockwood in the paper – this Lockwood, the besuited young man who wielded smiles as weapons and not the dirt-covered, filthy-mouthed urchin he had been before. That time Lockwood and his merry band had burnt down a house and this time it had been a 14-storey corporate building, so at least he’d moved up in the world. Last time, though, Quill had read the article and felt smug; this time, Quill read the article and felt fear. Had they made it out alive?

Well, Marissa was dead, at least. The papers had been clear on that. All Quill could do, he thought grimly, was hang on to the hope that no news was good news. And, in the meantime, ask for something to help him sleep.

⚔︎

The next time Quill woke up it was dark, the room lit only by the electronic glow of the machinery. His mind was hazy and he struggled towards consciousness slowly, his eyelids fighting to stay closed and pull him back under, the drugs they’d given him still promising a sleep that felt oh-so-tempting. But something had woken him up, some odd, out-of-place feeling, and Quill had been an agent far too long to ignore somethings.

So he fought – fought the residual drugs in his system, fought the lingering cold from the Other Side, fought through the exhaustion and pain and opened his eyes to find the ghost of Anthony Lockwood standing at his bedside.

The apparition was pale in the dim light, the body gaunt. It wore an ill-fitting t-shirt, tracksuit bottoms and a hoodie, all of which were crumpled in a way that felt offensively poetic on his Wraith. Its face was swollen, scabbed and bruised, and, though it stood very close, its weary gaze was fixed somewhere to the side. It wasn’t moving. 

This is it, thought Quill. Here’s my answer. Here’s the end.

And then, a breath later: Hang on, I lost my goggles last night.

‘Motherfucker—’ lashing out blindly, Quill flailed and sent the paper flying. ‘Lockwood! Are you trying to give me a heart attack?!’

Pain lanced through him at the sudden movement and he doubled over, annoyed. He’d meant to sound fierce. Furious. But the words had come out on a muddled croak and now Lockwood was all care and concern, parking himself on the bed as he fussed over him, and Quill wanted to fucking murder him.

‘Here, should I—’

‘Where the hell have you been?!’ he gasped out, doing his best to push him away even as Lockwood reached behind him to fluff his pillows. ‘It’s three in the morning!’

‘Look, lie back first, okay Quill? You’re—’

‘I’m not a bloody invalid!’ Quill snapped hoarsely, even as he leaned back on the pillows which were, much to his chagrin, now much more comfortable.

Lockwood, to his credit, didn’t answer; instead, he offered a cup of water that Quill angrily accepted.

‘You—’ he began, then stopped to take a sip.‘You – ugh. You’re alive, then.’

Lockwood’s expression was half-hidden in the dark. ‘Don’t sound too happy about it.’

‘And the others?’ He thought he already knew the answer from Lockwood’s demeanour alone – God, he hoped he already knew the answer – but he needed to hear it.

‘All okay,’ Lockwood said, and those two words sent the relief crashing over Quill like a torrent of water, sloughing off the vestiges of his terrified anxiety and leaving him shiny and vulnerable and new. He wasn’t one for waterworks but fuck was he ever glad for the darkness of the room.

Tilting his head back, Quill closed his eyes and breathed – in through his nose, out through his mouth, just like he’d taught hundreds of trainees to do. In, out, it brings you back around. In, out.

When he spoke a few moments later, his voice was pleasingly steady. ‘You found her, then? Lucy?’

‘Yeah. Yeah, I found her. She’s right next door, actually.’ Now it was Lockwood’s turn to exhale deeply, his shoulders sagging with exhaustion.

‘Next…?’ Quill blinked. ‘Wait, what do you mean she’s right next door? Lucy’s in the hospital?!’

‘Yeah,’ Lockwood answered, shifting to retrieve the newspaper from the floor, the crunch of the thin paper loud in the hushed night. ‘She collapsed this afternoon, just as we were trying to clear out a place to sleep back home.’ Paper crunched and tore as he spoke, worrying it in his hands. ‘Turns out she was bleeding internally. Stab wound in her side, from the fight in the penthouse.’

So there had been a confrontation, then. He didn’t want to hear the details now, though, not at three a.m. when he’d just woken up, and certainly not when Lockwood was mangling the newspaper like a Phantasm wearing a bow tie. He couldn’t deal with whatever was causing that. He needed to keep this light.

‘I didn’t get myself stabbed just so that Lucy could copy me, you know,’ Quill said at length, aiming for haughty.

Lockwood snorted, but the tearing sounds stopped. ‘You’ll have to tell her off for imitating your style when she wakes up, then.’

‘She’s all right, though?’

‘Mostly,’ Lockwood said, shrugging again. ‘She needed surgery but it was straightforward, and she was awake for a little bit before falling asleep again. She’s resting now.’

‘And the others…?’

‘Got sent home while she was still under. George is at Holly’s for the night; I called earlier, and they said they’d tried to visit you but you were asleep. I’m sorry, I meant to pop in, but I fell asleep when Lucy did so I didn’t get round to checking on you until I woke up five minutes ago.’ His voice was tired, but Quill could hear the smirk as he said: ‘Luckily I managed to persuade the nurses into letting me stay, because I’m quite sure visiting hours are over for the day.’

Quill wisely held his tongue. Outright refused to leave and generally made himself a pain in the neck was more likely than any other type of persuasion, if his behaviour when George had been admitted was any indicator.

‘So that’s it? Lucy and I are in hospital, the rest of you are okay?’

‘Yeah. I’ve got a couple of fractured ribs, but George and Holly escaped with mostly cuts and bruises.’

Had he been feeling stronger, Quill would have danced a fucking jig, reputation be damned. ‘So five out of five agents are alive, and all we’ve lost is some furniture, my goggles, and your coat?’

‘Yep,’ Lockwood said happily, popping the ‘p’ and turning to grin at him.

Sometimes I want sunglasses just to look at him, Lucy had once said. Quill had teased her mercilessly for it, of course, but in that moment, as Lockwood beamed at him in that half-lit room, he got it. Sometimes he exuded this energy that just dragged you out into the sunniest afternoon, even if it was despite your best intentions. George had called it The Lockwood Effect. 

Quill couldn’t help grinning back. Thank God the nurses weren’t due; they must have made a right pair, grinning at each other in the dark on a hospital bed like lunatics, but they definitely had something to smile about. Five out of five, baby.

‘We really did get out well.’

‘We did,’ Quill agreed. ‘I’m sorry about your coat, though.’

‘Don’t be,’ Lockwood answered firmly. ‘It went to a good cause.’

‘Still. I barely recognised you without it. Thought you were a Wraith at first.’

‘You thought I was… Bloody hell, Quill, do I look that bad?’

‘You look like shit warmed over,’ Quill confirmed. ‘And I can’t even see half of you in this light.’

Lockwood chuckled ruefully, turning his gaze to the window. The clock on the wall read three twenty-five in the morning so it was still a few hours to dawn, but the birds were already starting their song outside. Honestly, between the lateness of the hour and the magnitude of the things that had happened, Quill was almost at a loss for words. I’m glad we’re all alive felt too obvious, and Good job on the arson felt too casual. Instead, he followed Lockwood’s gaze and watched the sky slowly lighten from indigo to a cosmic blue.

To Quill’s (complete lack of) surprise, Lockwood broke the silence mere minutes later. ‘It was my father’s, actually.’

That actually was surprising. ‘What was?’

‘The coat,’ Lockwood clarified. ‘Wait – no. Don’t get the wrong idea; he never wore it or anything. It still had the tag on when I found it.’

‘But it was still your father’s.’

‘It was still my father’s,’ Lockwood agreed. ‘And I like to think I made it mine, too, over the years. But…’ he trailed off with a shrug, then turned to face him properly again, one hand gently gripping his shoulder. ‘You’re here, Quill, and that’s all that matters.’

His sincerity was all-encompassing, filling him with a strange, warm comfort – one that seemed to flow from Lockwood’s hand on his shoulder, from the ghosts of Lucy’s hand in his, of George’s fingers and their tight grip, of Holly’s hands on his chest. All of them, saying the same thing.

You’re here, Quill, and that’s all that matters. The words settled over him like a blanket.

[currentlyreadingawesomefanfics]

I desperately want the sims cats and dogs- in other words I’m going insane!

[millenialfanfictionaddiction]

Being Team Japan’s Manager

Manager is Stressed

Team Japan x GN! Manager (platonic relationship)

Warnings: Manager is feeling stress (I didn’t go into specific stressors because I wanted to make this as general as possible), Stress symptoms (sleep struggles, overthinking, lack of eating/overeating, etc. I tried to keep them neutral but I did have to give a little something), MEGA FLUFF

AN: this is a special request for @rae-is-typing! I apologize if it looks weird, it’s because tumblr hates me and I had to move it all over to word and then back again : D

• Honestly YN, I don’t know how you do it

• Literally, if it were me, I would have had a mental break down the first week of dealing with these idiots

• On the surface, it seems as if you have everything together

• I mean, you not only deal with your life but the lives of countless man-children

• Where as most people’s day starts at 8am and ends around 4-5pm

• You’re essentially on call 24/7, 365

• Literally you can’t even use the bathroom without Hinata or Bokuto knocking and asking what you are doing

• “Hey Yn, are you in there?” Bokuto and/or Hinata say knocking on the door

• You 👉🏻 maybe if I stay quiet they won’t think anyone’s in here….

• Honestly it’s a pipe dream Yn

• Just ignore them YN they will go away…

• Suddenly the door burst open and Bokuto and Hinata are in a full panic

• “OMG YN WE THOUGHT YOU DIED OR WORSE FAINTED!!” Bokuto screamed as Hinata is now hyperventilating

• And thus, the curtains close on your .02 seconds of peace and quiet

• Sakusa comes from beside saying, “you two really need to straighten out your priorities.”

• Then Iwaizumi is coming up yelling at you for leaving the door open to the bathroom 🙄

• You seriously cannot win

• Butalas everyone has their breakpoint YN and honestly I’m surprised you lasted as long as you did

• The Olympics were coming up and you were dealing with your own personal issues in your home life

• Seriously adding more stress to your already stressful life

• You never seemed to have time to do anything

• And you know how they say “things always come in threes”?

• You seriously cannot catch a break!!

• Your stress levels are skyrocking and with stress comes the unfortunate stress symptoms

• Some days you forget to eat while some days you feel like you can’t stop eating

• You’ve so little and yet you feel like you don’t have time to sleep

• The days seem long but yet you can’t accomplish anything 😩

• Honestly it’s just a nightmare

• You choose to suffer in silence, not wanting to bother anyone with your issues

• You know everyone else has problems and you don’t want to be that person to add more to someone else’s plate

• Deep down, you knew it wasn’t healthy to hold it in

• However everyone has their breaking point

• And our amazing YN’s cup has finally ran out

• You woke up feeling exhausted and it was a chore just to get yourself out of bed

• The stress was finally wearing on you and you needed a break

• Thank god tomorrow was the weekend, you just had to make it through today

• You headed to work, already looking forward to the 5pm whistle

• The guys were on their usual bullshit so you knew you’d have very little reprieve

• Yaku was the first to notice something

• “Hey Yn- you look run down?” He says as you look up at him

• “Dang Yn you look like you just got hit by a bus!” Atsumu chimes in

• You 👉🏻😐 thank you for that…

• Unfortunately you have very little time to breathe because Aran and Iwa surround you

• “Hey YN! We need you to get copies of the training schedules out to everyone,” Aran says

• “Yeah and I need you to go through the guys training manuals and replace the old sheets with the updated ones. It has to be done today Yn!” Iwa shouts

• Unwillingly adding more to your already tipped over plate

• “YN I need you to fill up all the volleyballs too,” the coach chimes in

• “Oh and we got a new sponsorship for some energy drink so we need you to make that pronto YN!” Ushijima just throws in there

• Meanwhile, the other dummies are all adding more and more until finally

• You break

• The tears start the flow and everything in your mind blanks as the damn of emotions finally cracks

• Everyone just stares at you, some in confusion and some in horror as you essentially break down on site

• “Hey YN, are you ok?” Aran asks, cautiously approaching you

• You just keep crying while trying to speak

• “N-no e-everything’s not-not ok!” You cry out, “I-I’m so-so T-tired and I-I can-can’t do T-this anymore!”

• The gym is filled with your sobs as the guys slowly began to realize how much they’ve been putting on you

• They have come to rely on you as their support, their go to person

• But they never took the time to check on you

• “Oh Yn, come on, let’s go sit on the bench,” Komori says, grabbing you and hauling you over

• Everyone follows in silence as you try to control your tears and your breathing

• It’s so much at once and all you can think about is how you’ve failed them

• “I’m s-sorry, I-I’ll get to wo-work,” you cry as Sakusa sits down beside you, essentially holding you in place

• “You’ll do no such thing Yn, take a break,” he says as the rest of the team nods

• They all feel horrible for neglecting you and not realizing how much stress you were under

• They just keep piling it on, not knowing the stress you were also dealing with in your personal life

• “YN, we are so sorry,” Hakuba says as the team nods

• “If we would have know Yn, we wouldn’t have been so hard on you,” Bokuto adds

• “It’s oh-ok, I-I need to d-do my j-job,” you stammer out

• “No Yn, you need to take care of yourself,” Iwa says

• “You need a break Yn, a few days off!” Kageyama chimes in

• “Yeah you need to get away from us for a while,” Hyakuzawa says

• Bokuto, Hinata, Atsumu 👉🏻 offended 🙄

• “Guys we have so much to do before the Olympics and I can’t just leave!” You cry out

• “YN if you aren’t going to take care of yourself, then I’m going to haul your ass home right now,” Iwa yells

• You 👉🏻👀 I mean…

• Iwa 👉🏻😐

• “Just take a few days Yn, take some time to rest and we can help you handle everything! I mean we have an entire team of capable men here!” Yaku says

• “I’d say 60% at more are capable,” Sakusa interjects

• Again Hinata, Bokuto and Atsumu 👉🏻 offended 🙄

• “If you think that’s best,” you say, deflated

• “YN we love you and we want you to be healthy! We would die if we didn’t have you cheering us on!” Komori says as the entire team nods frantically

• You sigh in defeat, knowing you need the rest

• “Ok but if you need me, make sure to message me!” You say, leaving the gym

• “We’ll be fine YN! Try to sleep and just breathe or something,” Aran says

• “WAIT YN HASN’T BEEN BREATHING THIS WHOLE TIME?!?” Bokuto screams

• Omg run YN, run while you still can 😂

[devildomwriter]

Obey Me As Tumblr #33

MC: Eating chips with chopsticks is unironically Galaxy brain. Your fingers don’t get greasy and it lasts longer

Solomon: Fork

MC: Oh yeah I’m going to stab my crunchy foods and make them fall apart like an absolute absent minded dunce fool, clown, jester, like a monstrous moron, an idiot of Shakespearean proportions, a cretin

Diavolo: Uhm, you seem to forget that chips can also mean fries? And that’s probably what they were talking about haha

MC: I did not forget anything. I purposefully ignore the idea of using British vocabulary to do my part in helping it die out

•

Belphegor: An alarm clock except it’s set to every time

Leviathan: We touch

Solomon: I get

Diavolo: This feeling

•

Beelzebub: I was talking with my brothers yesterday and we decided the best way to own a guy who takes off his shirt to fight you is to pick his shirt up and put it on

Mammon: That might be one of the ultimate power moves

Simeon: Or pick it up and say “lift your arms up” and try to put it back on him

•

Leviathan: By day I appear to be no more than just an average run of the mill office worker, but when night time strikes! I’m crying alone in my bed

•

Solomon: I bought my friend an elephant for their room

They said “thank you”

I said “don’t mention it”

Mammon: Is there a joke here that everyone gets but I don’t?

Belphegor: Nobody tell them

•

Thirteen:

Them: why are you competing in our cooking show today?

Me: the government banned gladiatorial matches yet I yearn for glory in the arena

Solomon: I’m here to tell you gladiator matches are still a thing, pal

Thirteen: Hm. Interesting. The last time I tried to behead a man for prestige and the right to majesty, I was dragged out of the alleyway by three very unreasonable men of the law and I would like to know where you live

•

Diavolo: What do you call a snobbish criminal going down the stairs?

Lucifer: I don’t know. What?

Diavolo: A condescending con descending

Lucifer: Get out

MC: That was beautiful

•

Leviathan: Bitten by a radioactive cicada. Now all I do is sit in a tree and scream all day

•

Solomon: Self-care is slathering yourself in baby oil and sliding down the 7th lane in your local bowling alley so the mechanical pin setter will pick you up and take you to the forbidden place behind the bowling lanes where you can meet God but only on Tuesdays

•

Mammon: Security called me at work today and told me they saw me outside chasing a frog around on the security cameras. I wasn’t in trouble they just wanted to let me know they saw me, I didn’t catch him

•

Leviathan: Me wearing a blanket as a cloak, stirring my man’n’cheese in a dimly lit room: potion

•

Satan: When I say I’m “feral” it doesn’t always mean I’m angry, maybe I’m stupid and if you give me food you’ll earn my trust and I’ll follow you around

•

Asmodeus: Covered in blood for sexy reasons

Asmodeus: Also I just got stabbed

Asmodeus: Don’t suppose there’s anyone here willing to tenderly clean, stitch and bandage my wounds while calling me an idiot in an exasperatedly fond tone of voice is there?

•

Diavolo: Introducing a new alignment— chaotic lawful. I have a strict moral code but nobody can figure out what the hell it is

•

Mammon: My best feature is that I’m blindingly intelligent for about 30 seconds a day

Mammon: I do not get to choose which seconds, they are not consecutive

•

Satan: Okay I’m normal now I promise. Let me out of the case please

•

Leviathan: Power move: calling someone a coward in the middle of a fight while also running away from them as fast as you possibly can

Lucifer: Mammon ghost wrote this

Mammon: YO

•

Leviathan: “Are you a boy or a girl?”

I am the physical embodiment of suffering

[falcqns]

for the first time (whats past is past)

✰ 𝐩𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠: Lucy Chen & Tim Bradford

✰ 𝐬𝐮𝐦𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐲: Tim calls Lucy in the middle of the night, hoping to every god that exists that her number hadn’t changed, and to every angel that she would pick up despite how he had hurt her.

✰ 𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬: canon divergence, angst with a happy ending obviously, Chenford. tagging @natashasera. Title is from Begin Again by my mothaaaaa 

don’t forget to read and reblog, and i do not give permission for my works to be posted anywhere other than tumblr. thank you.

“Please pick up,” Tim whispered to himself. He sniffed, trying blink back the tears that were gathering in his eyes. He knew he was stupid for doing this, for calling her; if he were her, he wouldn’t pick up the phone, especially after he had done what he did. She had needed him, and he had left her, and he wouldn’t blame her for doing the same to him. 

But, whatever gods that he had prayed to before hitting her contact must have heard his prayers, because just as he was about to give up, the ringing stopped, and he heard static for a brief second, before hearing a sound he thought he’d never hear again - Lucy saying his name in her beautiful, melodic voice. 

“Tim?” She said quietly, and Tim choked back a sob. 

“H-Hi,” he whispered. There was rustling on the other end for a brief moment before Lucy responded. 

“What happened?” She asked, her previously neutral tone shifting to concerned. 

Tim chuckled quietly. “Why do you assume that something happened?” 

“Because you wouldn’t be calling me in the middle of the night if it hadn’t.” 

Tim hung his head, sighing. “Y-You’re right.” He suddenly regretted calling her, he didn’t want her to think he’d only called her because he needed something, because that was far from the truth. He did need something, but she was the only one he wanted to call. Everyone else would look at him with pity - which he understood, because how sad is it that him, a nearly 40 year old man was broken up with and humiliated at a party? But still, he knew that if he had called Angela or Genny, they would have pitied him, but Lucy wouldn’t do that. She would feel bad for him, but he knew that she knew (better than anyone) that these things happened, and it was important to move on and not be stuck in the past. “I uhm..” He began, but stopped, unsure how to explain it without sounding like he was in high school. 

“Tim?” Lucy asked again, and this time, Tim cleared his throat before speaking. 

“I uh - I was at a party, with my girlfriend, and we got into a fight. It was stupid, but it caused her to freak out, and basically start bashing me in front of all of her friends.” He explained. 

“Im so sorry Tim,” Lucy said. “Wait, what do you mean by ‘bashing’ you?” She asked, and Tim chuckled sadly.

“Well,” he began. “She thought it was appropriate to bring up everything from my past, more specifically the things I had told her in confidence, like what happened with Isabel and my dad, and things I was ashamed about, like how I treated you.” He confessed. 

Lucy sighed on the other end, and the rustling could be heard again. “Tim, I’m so sorry that happened to you, you didn’t deserve that.”

Tim shrugged, even though he knew she couldn’t see it. “Kinda feels like I did, but right now I just want to get away from her and her friends, but I’m stranded. You were the only person I could think of to call who wouldn’t pity me.” 

Lucy laughed quietly. “Of course im not going to pity you, I learned my lesson with that when I was your rookie.” Tim laughed in response. “Send me the address, and I’ll come and get you.” 

Tim sighed in relief. “Thank you.” He said, and sent her a text with the location of the party. 

“Okay,” Lucy said, looking at the address. “It’ll take me about 20 minutes to get to you, but I’m leaving pretty much right now,” she said. “I’ll see you when I get there, okay?” 

“Yeah.” Tim replied. “Thank you again.”

“It’s no problem, Tim. I’m glad you called me.”

—— 

27 minutes later, Tim saw Lucy’s Gray Acura RDX pull into the driveway, and he was finally able to move off of the rock he had been sitting on. He walked over to her car, and opened the passenger door, sliding into the seat, and shut the door behind him. Lucy smiled at him, before reaching out and pausing the music she had been playing. 

Tim glanced at the screen, and his brows furrowed when he saw the song “I See The Light.”

“Why are you playing Disney music?” 

Lucy pointed behind her, and when Tim tuned his head around, he was shocked to see a car seat facing the back of the back seat, and a mirror on the headrest, allowing him to see the sleeping infant, no more than 6 or 7 months old, in the carseat. 

“Tangled is her favourite.” She said, putting the car in reverse, and backing out of the driveway. “And she was not too happy to be taken out of her sleep sack before she was ready.” Lucy said, a smile on her face. 

“Im sorry,” Tim apologized immediately. Not only did he wake her up in the middle of the night, he had her wake her sleeping baby up, to come and get him from a party in the middle of nowhere, when he could have just called an Uber.

Lucy shook her head. “Don’t be,” she said, reading his mind. “She was going to wake up soon for a feed anyways, so it’s all good.” 

Tim nodded, his head turning back to face the road. “I uh,” he said, glancing down at his hands before speaking. “I didn’t know you were a mom.” 

Lucy nodded with a smile. “Yeah, I am.” She said. “I love it more than I thought I would.” She explained. “I mean, I always knew I wanted to be a mom, but the second she entered the world, I knew I’d love it more than anything in this world.” 

Tim smiled. “I’m happy for you, I know how much you’d wanted the whole marriage and kids thing.”

Lucy nodded, eyes on the road. “Actually, just the kids. I’m not married.” She said. She looked sideways at Tim briefly, and answered his unasked question. “I’m single.”

“Oh,” Tim responded, unsure what else to say. 

“Yeah,” Lucy nodded, glancing back at her baby. “Chris wasn’t too keen on being a father.” She explained, and Tim shook his head. 

“What an idi- I mean dummy head.” He said, glancing back at the baby briefly, making Lucy laugh. 

“Its okay, you can swear.” She said. “I don’t care, and It helps her development, so swear it up.” She said, making Tim laugh. 

“What an idiot.” Tim continued, before shaking his head. “Nope, can’t swear. Feels too weird.” 

Lucy laughed, and Tim smiled looking over at her. He had missed that sound more than anything, and he knew it was all his fault that he hadn’t heard it in nearly two years. 

“Anyways, Sanford is a dummy head for doing that to you.” Tim continued. 

“I know, but it’s not the first time someone has left me when things have gotten hard.” She said, and Tim nodded sadly, knowing that she was referring to him now. 

“I know, and I’m-“ Tim began, before Lucy cut him off. 

“if you say ‘I’m sorry’ one more time, I’m pulling over and you can walk.”

They both laughed, and Tim opened his mouth once more. “Okay, okay I’m-“ he began, before him and Lucy glanced at each other, and immediately looked away as they both burst into laughter. 

Their laughs were cut short by a cry from the backseat. Lucy reached out, tapping the ‘AirPlay’ button on her car display, and bringing up the Tangled soundtrack again. 

“I’m sorry, Mae Mae,” Lucy said, looking into her rearview mirror, where she could see the reflection of her daughter. “Look, Mama’s playing your music.” As soon as Mandy Moore’s singing voice began to float from the car speakers, the infant calmed down, and looked out the window.

The car was quiet for a few minutes, and Tim wouldn’t admit it, but he actually enjoyed the Tangled soundtrack. He then decided to break the silence, wanting to know more about what he’d missed in the Lucyverse the past almost two years.

“What’s her name?” He asked, referring to the baby in the backseat.

Lucy swallowed nervously before she responded. “Her name is Maple.”

Tim’s heart pounded in his chest, a wave of gruelling grief, the same wave that had washed over him for months when he left Lucy that had stolen his ability to take care of himself, crashed over him once more. 

Maple was the name that they’d chosen together. Tim hadn’t liked it at first, but the more he’d thought about it, the name Maple Bradford definitely had a ring to it. When they’d broken up, he knew he was still going to use the name if he ever had kids, but he didn’t think that she would, especially after he left her the way he did. 

“Y-You used the name.” Tim said quietly, and Lucy nodded. She looked over at him, and his heart broke even more when he saw that she had tears in her eyes. 

“Yeah,” She admitted. “It was the only name that made sense to me.” She said, and upon seeing Tim’s confused look, she elaborated. “When I was in labor, I was all alone. It was the middle of the night, and I was woken up by the worst pain I had ever felt. I knew I was in labor, and was so scared of giving birth alone that I drove myself to the hospital. Once I got there, I was so scared, and didn’t want to disturb anyone, so I gave birth alone. The entire time, the only person I wanted beside me, I knew I couldn’t call.” She said, sniffling as she spoke.

“Who?” Tim asked, a little afraid of the answer.

“You.” She said, glancing at Tim. “I wanted you by my side. I wanted you to be there, holding my hand, and encouraging me. I wanted it to be you to be her father, not someone who never wanted her in the first place. But I couldn’t call you.” 

Tim turned his body to face her. “Luce, I would have absolutely came and been there for you had you called me, you know that right?” 

Lucy looked at him, a serious look on her face. “Do I, though?” She asked. “How was I supposed to know if you’d come and support me, after you left me when I needed you the most after I made P2?” She asked, and Tim looked down in shame.

He had done that. She had been struggling with him not being by her side on patrol, and was having separation anxiety and jealousy with him and his new rookie, and he, instead of supporting her and understanding, got mad at her and ended things. Which he immediately regretted, but regretted even more the next day when Grey told him that she had transferred, and hated himself when he went to her apartment, only to find that she was gone. 

“You’re right, I’m sorry.” He said. “I hate that I did that to you. I shouldn’t have just given up on you, on us like that. I should have supported and understood you, not walked away. I regret ending things.” 

“Well, its in the past now.” Lucy said. And Tim sighed sadly. 

“So theres no hope for us, is there?” He asked, and Lucy looked over at him.

“Of course theres hope,” She said, pulling her car into his driveway. “I’ve always had hope that we’d find each other again.” She put the car into park and turned towards him. “I’m glad that you called me.”

“I’m glad you answered.” He said. He then glanced at his front door, then at Maple, before his eyes landed on Lucy.

“Do you want to come in?” He asked, his voice shaking at the implications of what he was asking. 

Lucy smiled at him. “Of course we do.”

[joonsty]

Hybrid Au :

BunnyJungkook X Human Reader 🐰

Warnings : extreme possesive and obsessive behavior, smut, slight yandere themes? explicit sexual content; oral, fingering, multiple orgasms, orgasm denial/control, choking, unprotected sex, shower sex, creampie, marking/hickeys, rough, pet names, piss kink, rough manhandling? i guess bunny boy is stronger than reader. mentions of alcohol, pills, plot twist at the end, hint of soft/kook, I’m so fucking shite at recognising what bunnies do when they are angry or whatever so…I’m sorry. 🤍 uhm I feel like there’s more but I suppose I’ll remember later!

this is my first post on tumblr, so i guess im a bit nervous? I hope you like it!! requests are open, so feel free to send in suggestions & ideas! °❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:･

your keys rattled in the little doorlock, failing multiple times on opening the door. “fuck“ you sighed out as you dropped your keys on the floor. If i were to describe you, i would say you were drunk, sticky & a hot mess, but most importantly totally fucked. It was times like these, where you were drunk, that you would forget the rules and the people around you. He tried his hardest, drilling the words into your mind, making your dumb stupid brain memorize it by heart. But even then, you forgot the most important rule.

never ever leave your bunny boy alone.

so yeah, in simple words, you were fucked. you didn't know about the evil that sat in your house, glaring at the four walls in so much anger and pain. If only you listened, if only you paid more attention to your bunny boy than you did to your friends. who even cared about your friends? he could kill them in a heartbeat. sure, it’ll hurt you, but the sweet pain he would see on your face, your warm tears dribbling down your cheeks, it would be worth it.

so welcome back to the present, you grabbed your right hand, and steadily plopped the key into the lock, twisting it in success. “finally” you groaned out. your feet was sore and burning. you needed a shit ton of pain relievers and a warm shower to make you feel better tonight, maybe even a cuddle from your favourite boy. but oh god, how everything was going to go down the drain.

you sluggishly walked into your apartment and halted, eyes immediately locking with the hothead in-front of you. “g-gukkiieeee” you slurred as you ran to him, wrapping your arms around his neck and breathing in his musky scent. oh god, he felt so nice, you thought as you pressed a kiss to his shoulder.

before you could even comprehend what happened, he pushed you off him, making you stumble back a bit. “hey what are you-?” “don’t fucking touch me.” he growled. his fluffy bunny ears standing up straight, and you even noticed how big? he almost seemed. he turned his back to you and walked away to your shared bedroom, leaving you in the main room, confused and dizzy.

“oh fuck it” you thought, as you walked yourself in the bedroom as well. to be honest, you’ve had enough with jungkooks behaviour. his constant fear of him losing you to someone else, or how he made you drop and block all your male friends because, “I trust you baby, it’s them I don’t trust” & all that bullshit.

as you walked in, you saw him sitting on the bed, earphones plugged in, blasting his music on the full. he didn’t even spare you a glance. you really hated when he was angry. but then again, it was kind of like this all the time. you shimmied out of your dress, grabbing his tshirt and some shorts and scurried your way to the bathroom.

your feet touch the cold marble floor and you jerk back a bit, “wooh okay” you mentally prepare yourself before stepping in the shower. your hand turns the knobs for the water and the drizzles of shower comes shooting down as the warmest of summer rain, your eyes squeeze shut as you bask & enjoy the warm water dissolving all your pain and aches away.

you stay like that for a few minutes, gradually getting sleepier by the second, eyes feeling heavy and your legs on the verge to give out. god you should finish this shower and head to bed so you can slee-

“who tf do you think you are, hm?”

you flinch as his voice finally reaches you. fuck, you didn’t know whether to be shit scared or shit turned on rn. “what do-“

“shut the fuck up, whore.”

your mouth instantly seizes up. you’re pretty sure he can hear the loud thumping of your heart, punching against your fragile rib cage & the small breathy whimpers that leave your mouth.

his rough hand latches onto your throat and you swear your stomach clenches a bit. his calloused fingers soothingly rubbing the sides of your throat. you can practically feel his hard abs pressing your back, but thats not all. you gulp, taking a deep breath in.

“baby, whats wr-“ you get interrupted again & his hold tightens just a tad bit more.

“did i say you could fucking speak?“ he grits out.

“you know all you had to do was tell me, and i would've fucked this dirty cunt of yours, but no, my dumb little bitch wanted to go and fuck someone else.“

you look at him with wide eyes, what the hell is he talking about?

in a swift moment, hes got you pressed against the wall. the pebbles of your breast brushing uncomfortably against the tiles causing you to bite down on your bottom lip.

“guess i have to remind you that this pussy...“

his hand roughly slaps your clit, making you jump in pleasure.

“belongs to me, and only me.“

------------------------------------------------

& thats how you ended up, face down and ass up on the satin bed. tears streaming down your face, while you begged him to “stop, its too much“and in response he laughed at your face, mocking your whimpers.

you could say that the initial pain was blinding, feeling yourself getting stretched out by him made all your racing thoughts dissipate as every nerve in your brain focused on not passing out. plain and pleasure, that's what it was about.

your hands roughly clenched around the black sheet beneath you, his body pinning you down, his thick girth hitting impossibly deep inside you. you immediately muffled your screams into the bedsheet, allowing drool to dribble down your mouth and stain it.

in a sudden movement, you felt his hand wrap around your locks and painfully pull back. “who fucks you better hm?“ he breathes out, as his pace quickens. “what” you whimper out as you bite down on your bottom lip.

his nose tickles your jaw, as he guides his mouth closer to your ears. “I said, does he fuck you better than me?” he pulls out, making you gasp at the loss of contact on instinct. “god- you’re test-“ “no” “what did you say?” he grunts out, as he repeatedly taps his cock on ur clit, gently pushing in and out, teasing you. your walls clench around nothing and you could finally say that the pain was getting worse, you wanted a release and you wanted it bad.

“no, no you’re the only one I want, please, please, please” you begged, pathetically.

“hm I didn’t hear you what did you say?”

“please bunny, I need to-“

“excuse me?”

“please please, daddy, let me cum, I’ll do anything, please”

his cocky chuckle filled the four walls, bouncing of em and directly piercing through your ears.

“good girl.”

daam fuck. you couldn’t deny the warmth that started to fill your belly by his praise. sooner than expected, you came. like he always says "cumming on daddys cock like a filthy slut".

and you was indeed, HIS filthy slut.

you slumped down onto the bed, heart pounding within your chest, sweat gathering on your forehead and a insane urge for more. he fell next to you on the bed and his large hand clasped around your waist, pulling you next to him. You could smell his cologne entangled with his musky scent, how could you resist him, you just wanted him to roll you over and dwe-

'you okay?' he whispered, big eyes staring at you, and you stared right back.

'yeah...' you answered, as your hands slowly crept down his abdomen, and you swore you heard his breath hitch. you softly palmed his solid, pink hard-on and low purrs resonated to your ears.

'what are you-'

he was interrupted. you spit on his cock and hungrily slide him into your mouth, taking him in as much as you could, a small gag from you makes him hiss and he throws his head back. you lick the stripe of vein on the side and swirl your tongue softly on his tip, oh how he wants to just grab your hair and force you on his cock until your a blabbering mess, but he doesn't want to ruin the moment.

you pull back with a pop and glare at the man who's now ready to do whatever you want.

"oh how the tables have turned..."

hope you liked that! i will be posting more stories soon! if you want to be on the taglist, just let me know! ♡

do you prefer shorter or longer stories? (ill keep it in mind for next time!)

thanks for supporting! if you have any requests or ideas, please dont hesitate to dm me! even if you just want to have a chat! ⋅ ୨୧ ⋅

@meowyoongii @amyyysposts @theuniverse4koo @era-genius @gukjshi

(tag list currently!)

[acediaedeus]

a little afterthought from the last post about Ichigo, which I didn’t want to leave as a tag, cause it felt kinda unrelated, but yeah: the amount of existential and identity crises this boy had to go through is astounding.

he sees ghosts;

he killed his mother;

finding out he’s a shinigami;

finding out he’s a hollow;

finding out his father is a fucking liar (that one was a banger, straight up A+ parenting, give it up for Isshin);

finding out his whole life was planned and orchestrated by Aizen (I know Eren would go mad if someone pulled this shit on him);

finding out the spirit he thought was his sword wasn’t his sword all this time and actually is kind of the god he’s supposed to go defeat (casually, yk, like we all do on a nice Tuesday morning), and his actual sword is the Hollow he thought he needed to fight. but oh no, wait a moment, BOTH of them are his swords:

and oh yeah, he’s a quincy;

also don’t forget his mum dying wasn’t his fault, but wait no, it kinda was??

and of course that time he lost his powers aka the only thing allowing him to fulfil what he sees as his purpose in this life;

and then that one time a random dude pulled up and started gaslighting everyone around him, to the point that Ichigo started thinking HE was the one going mad (all that while still being powerless, so his sanity was already nonexistent);

and yeah, don’t forget the training with squad 0 when he got kicked out no sword, no nothing! (and was so ashamed and afraid of his father’s reaction he couldn’t go home, so he went to his boss???)

I could probably add some other stuff, but it’s not really canon, so let’s settle on these 11 points. obviously not in chronological order, bc I have memory issues and haven’t re-read the manga in a while, so don’t hold that against me, pls.

also, if this seems a little bit erratic, manic and unhinged… it’s bc it probably is, tbh. so I’m putting down tumblr before I write more bs.

aand last, but not least, I must thank @kingofanemptyworld , you are truly a darling and I couldn’t agree with you more, you never fail to validate my delusions!

╰(*´︶`*)╯♡

[peachkkuma]

📓. DIARY ENTRY 12︴JUNE 5, 2024

dear loass diary…

this couldn’t have happened any longer than ten minutes ago but I’ve finally felt what it’s like to be nailed to a state. and let me tell u this, it wasn’t the state I wanted. I’m sitting here on my bedroom floor rn, my actual diary laid out in front of me along with some pens. I was about to journal, mainly because I was feeling anxious about my circumstances, but here’s the thing. Yesterday, I made the goal to really live in imagination and try to be in it as much as I can. I wanted to know what it was like to be completely nailed to a state. Not even to get anything but because I want to and because it feels nice. anyways, back to that anxious feeling— I was thinking to myself “wait why am I feeling anxious? this doesn’t even make any sense I was happy with my state and my imagination yesterday-” until it hit me that I already was nailed to a state, the one I was trying to let die. the one that was home to my “circumstances”. the way I saw myself, saw my life, the thoughts running through my head, the plans I had for myself, the way I felt about my reality was all a perfect match for the state I didn’t want. and it was at that moment where I really felt the realization hit me. yk, the 3D can feel so real at times with all of its five senses and stuff that sometimes, I forget it’s a state. and I’ve always wanted to know what it was like to completely bask in a state, so to have realized that I’ve already been capable of doing that— that I’ve already been doing that, was just so…eye opening? and it kinda answers my annoyance, I was wondering why I still felt so worried when the truth was, how was I supposed to ever feel something else if that was the state I was so aligned with? I saw an example on another tumblr post— I’ll link it here —that said how someone wealthy like Elon Musk was used to being in the state of being rich, so it would be hard for him to fall into a state of poverty. I am so used to this state— the anxiousness, the incapability, the not being satisfied —that I merely fell into the sowf, and then climbed out of it. and because I quickly stopped identifying with it, because I went from having it to worrying about the things of my unwanted state, I was back in my unwanted state. and ofc, the thing that started this whole realization, I was thinking about things and my desired self. I was thinking about how I embodies my desired self yesterday and how that felt so… like, far away? ig? like it felt like it could never be me and I was surprised that I felt like I could ever be anything other than what I am now. and that’s actually the moment when I realize I had nailed myself to this state. now, thank god for this realization because it was just what I needed to snap me out of this cycle of worry. this means two things, 1. nailing yourself to a state is way less complicated than it sounds, it’s totally natural and 2. I am capable of completely embodying a state— u might be thinking, yeah no kidding we all can, but sometimes u just have to feel something in order to truly know it and that’s my case —and if I can do it with my unwanted state then I can sure as hell do it with my desired state. because what’s the difference? actually, I’ll tell you what the difference is. all states are equal, they’re neutral, nothing but a state. but I unknowingly decided to place one on a pedestal, I decided that because I wanted my desired state I would be harder to embody. but it’s just a state. and I’m reality, I’m imagination, I can make whatever I want come to life, whether the state seems desirable or not. that’s just how it goes, all states are available for me to occupy and then manifest. and I need to understand that, I need to get it in my head that happiness isn’t above me, that it should be natural and normal for me to have— tumblrs telling me that this is getting too long so this’ll be continued in another post #yappertron3000 🤓 (click here to read part two)

kisses, Tiffany