yukiwhitetm

[yukiwhitetm]

Explaining my gender in 10 words or less. (No. I disagree, longer is better. So, here is a full poem about my gender.)

My gender is

Purple flouncy dresses

And pink frilly bows,

Long pearl necklaces

And pretty shawls over elbows.

🎀

My gender is

Tartan scarves and skirts

In place of long packed away

But beloved tartan shirts

(Worn open with tank tops always).

👗

My gender is

Long blond hair,

Once worn in a short bob

Where the bobbed hair was dear

But felt bland, unattractive and a Karen-like snob.

👱🏻‍♀️

Or maybe my gender

Isn't how I present myself really

Or what I wear

To face the world everyday.

✨️

My gender is

Long nights knitting

To Romance programs on the telly,

Reading Fantasy and fanwritings

On the dim glow of a mobile or eReader.

📱

My gender is

Acting on stage, where performance is an art

(Never call me actress, always actor,

Since I can play all the same parts),

Back when my lacking health was not a factor.

🎭

My gender is

My once dream of teaching

A crowd of children,

Watching them growing up (given up due to my health worsening),

And my new dream of writing for children.

📚

Now, here are all the words

I'm not supposed to say

But I'm going to include

Them in this poem anyway:

✨️

My gender is

Cis, Woman, female, feminine, she/her/hers,

Treated like I'll never be good enough in form or function,

Always being dismissed by those around me, not just healthwise,

And everyone expecting me to marry and have children, regardless of if I want to.

👩‍👩‍👧‍👦

My gender is

Cis, Woman, female, feminine, hers/her/she,

Girls' nights out on the town as together we spill the tea,

Fancy teapots and yummy scones shared with my besties,

And long walks along the beach with my dog alongside me.

🐶

My gender is me.

❤️

by Yuki_White @yukiwhitetm

explain your gender in 10 words or less without using boring words like “male”, “female”, “nonbinary”, “masculine”, “feminine” or “androgynous”.

go!

[yukiwhitetm]

[yukiwhitetm]

I feel like this is an unpopular opinion, but more people should read incomplete/unfinished/in-progress fanfics.

I've noticed this huge trend where creators on tiktok and tumblr who will be explaining how to use Archive Of Our Own to new users and they always say "and make sure to scroll down and click completed only" or how people will go out of their way to mention they only read completed fics 'because they were traumatized when they forgot to check the dates and didn't realize this fic hadn't been updated since 2012'.

The thing is - I think by not engaging with and/or actively avoiding writer's WIPs readers are potentially adding to the aggregate of abandoned works. Now this obviously isn't the case for all abandoned fics, anything from major life events, to loss of interest, to getting busy can be a reason for a fic getting abandoned - but at least on some level I just know that writers are quitting while they're ahead when they aren't garnering any response or feedback because reading WIPs has become unpopular. If you're worried about reading something that hasn't been updated since 2012 then you can use the date updated function to sort out old fics.

Anyways, support your favorite fanfic writers by engaging with their WIPs.

[yukiwhitetm]

Friend: Don't you want to have a romance?

Me: I'm good, I have romance at home.

Romance I have at home:

[yukiwhitetm]

This is really interesting! Reblogging this for more people to see. Thank you for the feedback.💕💕💕

I do speak two languages myself (English and German) and I am aware that the issue of mixing these three terms up is likely largely because of translations into and from English - but I didn't realise this was why! German has words for all these things, you see!

Examples of this in German: Halbgeschwister is half-siblings (since you mentioned it here), Stieffamilie is step-family, Adoptivfamilie is adopted family, Pflegefamilie is foster family, etc. German just loves combining words to make new longer words, haha!

Saying all that, I am massively into Asian media, anime, donghua, C-drama and K-dramas, at the moment. (And I absolutely love how, in C-dramas, Mandarin Chinese has specific words for what your position in the family is. E.g. In English, the most you can say without it sounding clunky is if a brother is oldest, older, younger or youngest. Like, you can say it but, in normal conversation, it will be lengthy and out of place. But! In Mandarin Chinese, they can be really specific and say da-ge, er-ge, san-ge and didi, meaning first older brother, second older brother, third older brother and younger brother. It's really fun and adds so much to the story! It's brilliant! 💖 Although, you have to keep an eye out because there are also sworn brothers and it's culturally normal to call people brother you're not related to. 😂 ) So, I really should have realised things worked differently in other languages. Since I largely notice this mix up happening in Japanese manga, Korean WebToons and fanfiction written (usually such good fanstories, Oh My Gosh, am I proud of you guys!) by people who speak English as a Second Language. But I didn't. Sorry! I don't speak those languages (although I may pick up a few words here and there) and I certainly don't speak other languages like Spanish or Brazilian Portugese (even though that would be very cool!) so I ask you forgive my ignorance.

Still. I admit. Despite knowing that now. Forgive me but... It is still a pet peeve! Harmless and small. Not a big deal. But a pet peeve.

What's your writing pet peeve?

My pet peeve is when writers mix up step-family, adopted family and foster family. So often I see a writer say step-family when they mean adopted family or foster family. I think it's my their, there, they're!

Explanation of step-family vs adopted family vs foster family below:

Step-family

A step-family (step-mother, step-father, step-sister, step-brother, etc) is when a single parent from one family a marries a single parent from another family, making them into a new family. Anyone in the newly married family that one isn't biologically related to is now their step-family.

Example:

Cinderella! After Cinderella's mother dies, her father is left as a single widower. He then marries a single woman with two daughters. This makes them Cinderella's step-family - her step-mother and step-sisters. Cinderella is not related to her step-family in any way! They are only a family legally through the marriage of their parents.

Adopted family

An adopted family (adopted mother, adopted father, adopted sister, adopted brother, etc) is when someone(s), known as the the adoptee, is are legally adopted into a family, known as the adopter) without marriage, making them into their adopted family. It is usually children being adopted into families, however adults can be adopted as well, depending on the laws of your country (i.e. you can't adopt adults in the UK but you can in the USA). It is also typical that the adoptee is being adopted as the adopter's child not their sibling, however it is possible that sibling adoption exists somewhere too. When someone is adopted into a family, that makes them fully legally a part of that family and they are treated by the law as if they were born to that family, including inheritance and debts.

Example:

Roald Dahl's Matilda. Matilda is famous for her intelligence, bookishness and wits (as as well as her telekinesis powers!). She survives great adversity through her abusive head teacher Miss Trunchball and her neglectful birth family. As anyone who has watched film knows, by the end of the story, Matilda's parents give up their parental rights to her and so allow her teacher Miss Honey to adopt her as her adopted daughter. After this, Matilda and Miss Honey are a happy adopted family.

Another example is Anne Shirley of Anne of Green Gables by L. M. Montgomery who is adopted by brother and sister, Matthew and Marilla Cuthbert. She is brought up as a beloved daughter by them.

Foster family

A foster family (foster mother, foster father, foster sister, foster brother, etc) is when an adult(s) fosters a child as their ward. Legally speaking, they are not family. Not by law. The adult are simply the child's caregiver, their guardian. Now, that doesn't mean that any foster parents don't see their foster children as their children and treat them as such, that does happen and is common. However, since the children are still legally part of the foster system and not lawfully the adult's children through birth or adoption, they do not have full rights to them. Foster children tend not to inherit, unless outright specified by the adult's Will amd Testament. Foster parents are given money by the government to care for the children because they are not legally their children. Think of it as a system connected to orphanages. Plenty of foster parents, however, do choose to adopt their foster children, however there are many factors effecting whether they choose to do that or not.

Example:

Wei Wuxian from The Untamed/The Grandmaster of Demonic Cultivation | Mo Dao Zu Shi by Mo Xiang Tong Xiu. Wei Wuxian's parents die when he is five-years-old, he then ends up living on the streets until he's found and taken in by Jiang Fengmian at about nine or ten years old. However, he is not just taken into the Jiang martial sect as a disciple, he is taken into the Jiang family as a son and brother... but not legally adopted into the family. Meaning, although they don't have the terminilogy in the setting of the story, the Jiang are Wei Wuxian's new foster family.

Now, the fact that he is not legally adopted creates many problems throughout the story. Societally, it puts him in a weaker position than he might have been if adopted, he's seen as the son of a servant not the brother to the Jiang siblings Jiang Cheng and Jiang Yanli. And it means he can't inherit anything outside of the most extenuating of circumstances. If he were adopted he would be in a much more safe and secure position politically and socially speaking but he isn't, leaving his place in question. Sometimes, he is treated as a son of a servant and, sometimes, as the brother of the Jiang siblings, whichever is most convenient to the speaker.

Of course, his lack of adoption is likely a very purposeful choice on the part of the Jiang parents Jiang Fengmian and Madam Yu, as Jiang Fengmian is grooming Wei Wuxian to be his son's perfect right hand man (no matter what he might want for himself) and sacrifical lamb, and Madam Yu sees Wei Wuxian as a threat to Jiang Cheng's inheritance being that Wei Wuxian is five days older and more talented. (Exacerbated by the rumours that Wei Wuxian is Jiang Fengmian's illegitimate son - he isn't.)

Unfortunately, they are not good foster family to him, as Madam Yu abuses Wei Wuxian and Jiang Fengmian is complicit by not doing anything about the abuse and grooming him. Whilst Wei Wuxian's relationship with his foster siblings is complicated, sometimes strained and often toxic because of their parents' abuse (psychological towards the Jiang siblings), they do see him as their brother. Jiang Yanli outright calls Wei Wuxian her didi (little brother) in public and sacrifices her life to save him. And Jiang Cheng chooses to sacrifice his golden core (the source of his magic) to save Wei Wuxian. Unfortunately, due to manipulation by outside forces, by the end of the story, Jiang Cheng and Wei Wuxian as the last remaining Jiangs have a distant relationship. They will always love each other but have to let each other go. They are both close uncles to Jiang Yanli's son Jin Ling, however.

A not-example of foster family is Morgana from BBC Merlin. Early on, Morgana is presented as King Uther's ward, in other words King Uther's foster daughter, and Prince Arthur's foster sister. However, it is later revealed that she is actually King Uther's daughter! Meaning that she is Prince Arthur's half-sister (they have different mothers) and has a right to inheritance of the throne of Camelot.

See how step-family, adopted family and foster family are totally different! And should not be mixed up!

[yukiwhitetm]

Bought my dog Isabelle a pet toy and this happened.

[yukiwhitetm]

What's your writing pet peeve?

My pet peeve is when writers mix up step-family, adopted family and foster family. So often I see a writer say step-family when they mean adopted family or foster family. I think it's my their, there, they're!

Explanation of step-family vs adopted family vs foster family below:

Step-family

A step-family (step-mother, step-father, step-sister, step-brother, etc) is when a single parent from one family a marries a single parent from another family, making them into a new family. Anyone in the newly married family that one isn't biologically related to is now their step-family.

Example:

Cinderella! After Cinderella's mother dies, her father is left as a single widower. He then marries a single woman with two daughters. This makes them Cinderella's step-family - her step-mother and step-sisters. Cinderella is not related to her step-family in any way! They are only a family legally through the marriage of their parents.

Adopted family

An adopted family (adopted mother, adopted father, adopted sister, adopted brother, etc) is when someone(s), known as the the adoptee, is are legally adopted into a family, known as the adopter, without marriage, making them into their adopted family. It is usually children being adopted into families, however adults can be adopted as well, depending on the laws of your country (i.e. you can't adopt adults in the UK but you can in the USA). It is also typical that the adoptee is being adopted as the adopter's child not their sibling, however it is possible that sibling adoption exists somewhere too. When someone is adopted into a family, that makes them fully legally a part of that family and they are treated by the law as if they were born to that family, including inheritance and debts.

Example:

Roald Dahl's Matilda. Matilda is famous for her intelligence, bookishness and wits (as well as her telekinesis powers!). She survives great adversity through her abusive head teacher Miss Trunchball and her neglectful birth family. As anyone who has watched the film knows, by the end of the story, Matilda's parents give up their parental rights to her and so allow her teacher Miss Honey to adopt her as her adopted daughter. After this, Matilda and Miss Honey are a happy adopted family.

Another example is Anne Shirley of Anne of Green Gables by L. M. Montgomery who is adopted by brother and sister, Matthew and Marilla Cuthbert. She is brought up as a beloved adopted daughter by them.

Foster family

A foster family (foster mother, foster father, foster sister, foster brother, etc) is when an adult(s) fosters a child as their ward. Legally speaking, they are not family. Not by law. The adult is simply the child's caregiver, their guardian. Now, that doesn't mean that any foster parents don't see their foster children as their children and treat them as such, that does happen and is common. However, since the children are still legally part of the foster system and not lawfully the adult's children through birth or adoption, they do not have full rights to them. Foster children tend not to inherit, unless outright specified by the adult's Will amd Testament. Foster parents are given money by the government to care for the children because they are not legally their children. Think of it as a system connected to orphanages. Plenty of foster parents, however, do choose to adopt their foster children, however there are many factors effecting whether they choose to do that or not.

Example:

Wei Wuxian from The Untamed/The Grandmaster of Demonic Cultivation | Mo Dao Zu Shi by Mo Xiang Tong Xiu. Wei Wuxian's parents die when he is five-years-old, he then ends up living on the streets until he's found and taken in by Jiang Fengmian at about nine or ten years old. However, he is not just taken into the Jiang martial sect as a disciple, he is taken into the Jiang family as a son and brother... but not legally adopted into the family. Meaning, although they don't have the terminilogy in the setting of the story, the Jiang are Wei Wuxian's new foster family.

Now, the fact that he is not legally adopted creates many problems throughout the story. Societally, it puts him in a weaker position than he might have been if adopted, he's seen as the son of a servant not the brother to the Jiang siblings Jiang Cheng and Jiang Yanli. And it means he can't inherit anything outside of the most extenuating of circumstances. If he were adopted he would be in a much more safe and secure position politically and socially speaking but he isn't, leaving his place in question. Sometimes, he is treated as a son of a servant and, sometimes, as the brother of the Jiang siblings, whichever is most convenient to the speaker.

Of course, his lack of adoption is likely a very purposeful choice on the part of the Jiang parents Jiang Fengmian and Madam Yu, as Jiang Fengmian is grooming Wei Wuxian to be his son's perfect right hand man (no matter what he might want for himself) and sacrifical lamb, and Madam Yu sees Wei Wuxian as a threat to Jiang Cheng's inheritance being that Wei Wuxian is five days older and more talented. (Exacerbated by the rumours that Wei Wuxian is Jiang Fengmian's illegitimate son - he isn't.)

Unfortunately, they are not a good foster family to him, as Madam Yu abuses Wei Wuxian and Jiang Fengmian is complicit by not doing anything about the abuse and grooming him. Whilst Wei Wuxian's relationship with his foster siblings is complicated, sometimes strained and often toxic because of their parents' abuse (psychological towards the Jiang siblings), they do see him as their brother. Jiang Yanli outright calls Wei Wuxian her didi (little brother) in public and sacrifices her life to save him. And Jiang Cheng chooses to sacrifice his golden core (the source of his magic) to save Wei Wuxian. Unfortunately, due to manipulation by outside forces, by the end of the story, Jiang Cheng and Wei Wuxian as the last remaining Jiangs have a distant relationship. They will always love each other but have to let each other go. They are both close uncles to Jiang Yanli's son Jin Ling, however.

A not-example of foster family is Morgana from BBC Merlin. Early on, Morgana is presented as King Uther's ward, in other words King Uther's foster daughter, and Prince Arthur's foster sister. However, it is later revealed that she is actually King Uther's daughter! Meaning that she is Prince Arthur's half-sister (they have different mothers) and has a right to inheritance of the throne of Camelot.

See how step-family, adopted family and foster family are totally different! And should not be mixed up!

[yukiwhitetm]

That would be amazing. I'd be very grateful!

but what if i read one of your fanfics and then went to your ao3 account and read all of your fanfics and left a comment on every single chapter of every single one and you got spam emails from all of my kudos and comments and it made you smile, what then? what if i brighten your day with my words like you did mine, what then???

[yukiwhitetm]

After much thought and deliberation, I have bought a worry ring! A real Sterling silver Kit Heath worry ring or anxiety ring. I subconsciously bite my nails and scratch at the back of my neck out of anxiety so I'm hoping this will relieve some of that! Not all at once, though. My skin is hypersensitive and I'm not used to wearing rings at all! So, I think I'm going to have to build up to wearing it, first an hour, then two, then three, etc. Still, I'm hoping this will, eventually, help!

[yukiwhitetm]

fanfic writing culture isn’t “oh dang! I wanted to write about this prompt with this character but someone else already wrote it, so now I can’t”.

fanfic writing culture is always “two cakes is better than one. the more the merrier. there can ever be enough fics of this character with this prompt!”

[yukiwhitetm]

Wow, now there's a bot going around on Ao3 telling people that the "moderators" will delete works from "deprecated" fandoms and impose bans.

Fearmongering bullshit, but it's fearmongering bullshit that seems to be taking advantage of the recent spotlight series in order to trick authors into deleting their fics.

Just. Why.

What the hell does anyone get out of making these bots.

[yukiwhitetm]

Lately, I've noticed a sudden influx of new comments on my Batfam story A Better Brother. I posted this story as a one-shot, first part in a series a few months ago. And yet haven't been well enough to write the next part (sorry!). But I am still planning to! I have a fun idea for where this series can go now! Thank you to everyone who read, kudosed and commented. I appreciate you.

[yukiwhitetm]

Summary: "I remember him as…sunny,” Sizhui tells her. “His whole personality radiated sunshine and warmth. He was always smiling, always cracking a joke. He loved playing and rough-housing with us kids, but he could also be very gentle if he wanted to. Looking back, he couldn’t have been older than twenty-five; he was probably even younger than that, now that I think about it. But despite the short time we’ve spent together while he was looking after the kids at the orphanage, he always felt like a father to me.” In which Lan Sizhui goes on a TV show, to find the man he saw as a father figure while he was in the orphanage, and who disappeared one day. ...and who just so happens to be his adoptive father's long-lost love.

Author: @sweetlittlevampire

[yukiwhitetm]

Fanfiction writers be like:

"here's the immensely time consuming 100K word novel-length passion project I'm working on between my real life job and family! It eats up hundreds of hours of my one and only life, causes me emotional harm, and I gain basically nothing from it! Also I put it on the internet for free so anyone can read if they want. Hope you love it!" :)

[yukiwhitetm]

some doodles of what tim looks like in my fic yayyyy. or at least how i personally imagine him. minor spoilers for chapter 15

[yukiwhitetm]

An update on how I'm doing!

I finally had my Personal Independance Payment (PIP is a non-work-related disability benefit in the UK) Tribunal last Thursday and I basically won, although I still feel I didn't win everything I deserve but my Review is next year again so I'll fight it then. Still, whilst intellectually I knew I should be happy or glad, I mostly just felt unheard, a little tricked, a bit stupid (because of miscommunication) and very worried about the future because they're changing PIP (and it's ridiculous). I am very grateful, though.

As a bit of retail therapy, I bought myself my very belated birthday present that my friends all had given me giftcards towards of a Kobo Libra Color ereader! I wanted one because I struggle to read (whether it's on paper and on my mobile) due to serious chronic pain I get in my hands - but I love a good book! I thought that an ereader would be lighter and so easier on my hands, plus there's clip-and-button attachment too (as well as a stylus). And I was right!

I've already read three whole books!

They were volumes one to three of Scum Villain's Self-Saving System by Mo Xiang Tong Xiu. A hilarious action-packed, villain-redemption, BL, isekai story by the same author who wrote the books that the popular and excellent C-Drama The Untamed is based on (called The Grandmaster of Demonic Cultivation, which I am also planning to read). I will probably still buy physical books because I love them but they'll be more for display and to support the author, as I'll be reading the ebooks.

The weather has been beautiful lately so I've been reading outside in our back garden. Blessed by Isabelle cuddles.

As to my own writing. Well, I haven't been well enough to write in months, to be honest. But I'm hoping the lessened anxiety from the PIP Tribunal being over and soon the DVLA (basically sorting out necessary adaptations for my car and on my licence) and Universal Credit (my type of UC is a work-related disability benefit in the UK) will be over too, hopefully, and the good weather might slightly improve my health. So that I can do something.

What I am uncertain about is if:

a) I should focus on correcting my proofread version of my completed novel Shattered (my proofreader removed all my purposeful repetition so now I have to go through all 50k words and put it all back 😭) . Note that Shattered is a High Fantasy YA novel (with very subtle GL vibes atm) that is the first in a five part series.

OR

b) I should put that aside for now and focus on continuing to write my work-in-progress Truth, Lies and Butterflies. To those who have been following me for awhile, I'm on chapter nine, the sleepover chapter if you read the fanfiction version. To my newer followers, Truth, Lies and Butterflies is a Fantasy YA, Magical Girl/Guy, Redemption, BL standalone novel that is being adapted into an original work from my crossover fanfiction between New Danganronpa V3 and Miraculous Ladybug called You will always be Monarch Butterfly!

[yukiwhitetm]

I wouldn't go so far as hate. Hate is a strong word for me, one I rarely feel. But I would be disappointed in you. By doing this, you would have betrayed my trust in you as my reader. The special relationship between author-and-reader would have been irreparably damaged by your selfish, self-centred, assisting-in-stealing-artists'-work actions. Don't feed other people's creative writing, whether it be fanfiction or original writing, poetry or prose, into AI. Don't do it.

This is the worst timeline. (x)