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Chasing Healing, Not Just Relief

It’s no secret that I’ve been struggling with depression for a few years now, but it still amazes me how much something as simple as sunlight—or the lack of it—can deeply affect my mood and energy. I’ve done all the “right” things: seen doctors, done bloodwork, adjusted medications. After a recent psych evaluation, my antidepressant dose was increased from 10 mg to the max 20 mg. And yet, here I…

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The Weight Beneath the Blanket

The more I reflect on my life, the deeper I look within, the more I realize how much the trauma I’ve endured has shaped me. Somewhere along the way, I learned to keep a blind eye and just keep moving forward. That youthful energy we had in our younger years kept us going, even when we were wounded inside. I didn’t stop. I couldn’t. I just kept pushing, always looking ahead, always chasing a dream…

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To The Angles Among Us

It’s Mother’s Day once again, and honestly, words will never be enough to describe these incredible, giving souls. Mothers—these selfless warriors—pour love and care into the world without hesitation. They put everyone else, not just their children, above themselves, never pausing to ask if they should, or if the ones they’re giving to even deserve it. They just give. Unconditionally.…

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When Empty Isn’t a Bad Thing

Last night, I dreamed I was writing a post. That rarely happens. I usually only write when something needs to come out of me—when something sits heavy on my chest or circles in my mind too long. I don’t force it. I let it flow. And maybe that’s why I haven’t written much these past few days. I had an intense burst of thoughts and feelings that poured out of me daily until… I was…

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Some Days Hit Different

There are days when you set out to do it all, only to end up getting halfway through your list—held back not by time or motivation, but by the aches that whisper from every corner of your body. It’s funny how age works. It sneaks up on you. Your soul still feels young, vibrant, full of life—capable of anything, dreaming the impossible. But then reality sets in. Your body, this physical shell,…

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I’m Done Arguing

I’ve come to a quiet but powerful realization: I’m done with arguments. I’m done with exhausting conversations that go in circles, where no one is really listening—just waiting for their turn to speak. Especially when the goal isn’t growth or understanding, but simply to be “right.” When I was younger, I mistook debates for passion. I thought arguing meant we cared. It was part of the fire in…

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The Same Mistake, Over and Over Again

I find myself here—again.The same pattern, the same heartache, the same lesson… one I promise myself I’ve learned, only to slip right back into it.Each time I whisper, “never again,”And yet—again. I move through this world heart-first.I feel before I think.I give, not in portions, but in full. All of me.With no hesitation, no calculations, no second-guessing.Because that’s how I wish the world…

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The Picnic and The Patterns

Today, I went on a picnic with some friends. It was supposed to be a fun escape—fresh air, good company, a scenic view—but instead, I found myself once again caught in a familiar pattern. The drive was long, nearly two and a half hours, and by the time we arrived, we hadn’t even landed in the place we initially planned for. Not because it wasn’t there. Not because we got lost. But because our…

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Finding Light in the Chaos

Lately, I find myself deeply confused by the world we live in. One moment, I see the beauty — the kindness of strangers, the generosity of a helping hand, the simple joys shared between people. In those moments, I think, what a wonderful world this truly is. But then… I see the other side.The news flashes with images of war, senseless violence, discrimination, children sleeping on the streets.…

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Canada, Where Are We Headed?

With everything happening lately in the political arena, especially as the election gears up to be a showdown between Pierre Poilievre and Mark Carney, it’s hard not to feel disheartened. It feels more and more like we’re being asked to choose between two versions of the same broken system. And as a proud Canadian—someone who loves this country deeply—it’s painful to watch. Canada has long been…

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The Van, The Dream, and The Lesson

Did I buy a van while barely scraping by? Absolutely not. I made a conscious decision to invest in a reliable, everyday vehicle—something I could drive daily while also transforming it into my dream camper. And that’s exactly what I did. I used my tax return money to buy a car that fit both needs: practical for now, with the potential to become something more. What I do regret, however, is how I…

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All Over the Place — But Exactly Where I Need to Be

What does it even mean when someone says you’re “all over the place”?Is it a critique? A judgment? A way to say you’re not fitting neatly into the mold they’ve come to expect? The world has these invisible lines—norms—drawn by society, drawn by culture, drawn by roles we’ve inherited: wife, husband, mother, father, sister, brother. Each one wrapped in obligations and silent rules. We’re expected…

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Tell It Like It Is

Am I a know-it-all?Yes.And for the first time, I’m not saying that with shame or defensiveness—but with honesty. Because for the longest time, I’ve needed to be seen as someone who knows. Someone who shines. Someone who earns the praise. The truth is, I’ve always been a praise junkie. I grew up in a household where things were… complicated. We coexisted, but we weren’t really together. Emotions…

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What Makes a Date Significant?

I was recently asked to write down a significant date from my life. Just one. A date that stands out—marked in memory, etched with meaning. At first, I thought this would be easy. After all, I’ve lived through moments that society would label as important: my wedding, the birth of my children, my university graduation, even my immigration journey. But strangely enough, when I sat with the…

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Is Change Ever Truly Good or Bad?

I find myself standing at a crossroads—one that feels heavier than any I’ve encountered before. On one side, there’s the familiar path: the job that brings stability, the benefits that support my family, the predictable routine I know how to navigate. But with that path comes something else—a slow erosion of who I am. A quiet, constant sacrifice of self for survival. On the other side, there’s…

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Reflecting on a Heavy Heart

I am overwhelmed with rage, sorrow, and helplessness over the ongoing genocide in Palestine. For years—decades—I’ve tried to protect my heart from the constant stream of bloodshed, hatred, and destruction. I’ve looked away from the news, avoided the updates, tried to shield myself from the agony of seeing children murdered, women violated, families erased, entire neighborhoods flattened under…

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Staying Informed or Staying Sane?

I visited a friend recently, and as often happens during these visits, our conversation drifted into world events. It struck me then—how out of touch I’ve become with the daily news. Not out of ignorance, but out of choice. I realized I’ve developed a habit, maybe even a defense mechanism: I purposefully avoid watching, listening to, or reading the news. It didn’t start out as a conscious…