#;; ( you me and she makes three. IVY / HARLEY / SELINA )

[haveihitanerve]

Hair

Talia Al Ghul had let him braid her hair sometimes. Whether it was for a special event or for a holiday or just when they had time to spend together, without the threat of being overheard or interrupted.(Not that the interrupter would get away with it.) But for an hour, or however long they were granted, at least once a month. Damian Wayne didn’t have to be Ra's Al Ghul heir. He could just be Damian. Braiding his mothers hair. But mother was not around anymore. And Damian had no plans of ever being around her again. Even though he had enjoyed those days. She had been kinder then. Softer. More like a mother. But Selina had shown him what a real mother was like. And Talia had not been that. But he missed braiding hair. So his feet led him to her door. 

Selina opened it on the second knock and smiled when she saw it was him. Talia had never smiled just by seeing him. He had to have done something good, something to make her proud to get her to smile at him. But Selina smiled. At him. Because he was there. “Hello kitten.” She crouched to be at his level. Another thing no one had ever done in the League. They found arrogance in their height over him. But Selina, and Bruce, and his siblings all knelt to be eye level with him. “Hello Selina.” He said back. “What do you need?” She asked, still smiling softly. What do you need? Not, what do you want? Not, not now Damian. No. What do you need so I can help you? Damian smiled and Selina lit up. “I would like to braid your hair.” He said softly. Selina stood, nodding. “You came on the perfect day.” She headed back into her room, beckoning him. Damian followed her into the very back of her room, where she pushed a panel in the wall to reveal a second room. Damian blinked. The room was painted a soft black, stars and bats and cats stenciled every so often. It had a few dark red couches and beanbags, along with a black cupboard. But the most shocking thing of all was Cass, Steph, and Babs were all seated on the couches, talking and laughing. They stopped when they spotted him, but still smiled warmly. “Hey baby bird!” Steph called, scooting to one side of her seat. “Come join me!” “No me!” Babs called, shifting as well. Cass signed a few words and Damian smiled, heading over to sit with his sister. Steph and Babs pulled a face and Cass grinned in triumph, pulling Damian onto her lap. “Hello Batladies!!” Selina grinned. “Welcome to our own personal spa room. I already did this spiel but since we have a new member, Damian Wayne, I thought I should go over it again.” She winked at Damian. “This is a place where we can talk and gossip and laugh and cry. Any emotions and rants are welcome. Vent if you’d like! Sit in silence too! No judgment. Just relaxation and girl time! Plus Damian of course!” He smiled. “We should be expecting three more guests…” she trailed off as another door opened and Harley Quinn and Poison Ivy stepped into the room. 

Cass tightened her hold on Damian, just in case he wanted to attack. But he was perfectly content in her arms. “Damian, I’d like you to meet two of my best friends, Ivy and Harley.” Damian waved and Ivy and Harley gave him matching smiles. “Hey!” Steph called. “Love y’all’s hair.” The two women grinned and walked over, sitting down across from them. “Looking for ideas Steph?” Ivy mocked. Steph snorted. “Yeah right. Like I’d go fire red or crazy cotton candy.” The two women laughed and plopped down onto the sofa. “Now we just need Lois and we’ll be ready to start!” There was a knock and Lois Lane walked in. “Sorry! Am I late?” Ivy laughed. “Just on time Lane. Like always” Lois smiled. “Thanks Ivy.” She took a seat next to Babs at the girls' invitation and Selina grinned, walking over to the large cupboard. “Alright! Pick your favorite color gals and let’s start!” The cupboard was filled from bottom to top with beauty products, nail polish, hair curlers, face masks, eyelash curlers, and more. The women all jumped up, rushing to grab a color, Steph and babs climbing over the other to grab pink and Ivy and Lois arguing over the right shade of red. Selina laughed, a loud joyful thing and Damian smiled as he watched her. Cass just grinned, still sitting. Steph grabbed a hot pink and walked past, plopping a navy blue into her sister's hand. Cass smiled in thanks. Selina caught Damian’s eye and winked, beckoning him over. He slipped off Cass’s lap, walking over to her. She picked a color off the wall and knelt down, holding it out to him. “How bout it baby bird?” Damian examined the color. 

She had picked a nice bright forest green. Green was his favorite color. “It’s- a bit bright.” He said slowly. “I have an idea!” Steph was next to them, looking for a bright purple. “How about-!” She pulled a few colors off the shelf then settled on two. “Here.” She squatted next to him as well. “You can put the green down as the bottom layer, then put this black layer over top. So it looks black, but then in certain lights, it’ll shine green.” Damian considered it, then nodded. “Okay.” Steph squealed and hugged him, grabbing the colors and his hand. “Perfect!” She hurried over to her couch and threw babs feet off(causing babs to shout a string of words Bruce had pretty much banned in the house) and sat Damian down instead. “Hold out your hands.” She ordered. Damian did as she asked. “You’re gonna look so good Dami!” She said, grinning. If Damian didn’t know his sister was a wonderful person who only wanted the best for him he would’ve thought she was joking. Babs blew on her bright red nails, having lost the fight for pink, and reached for a face mask. “Wanna do a mask babe?” She asked him. “It’ll cleanse your pores. Make your skin soft and clean.” Damian nodded. “Okay.” Babs grinned and Damian allowed her to apply it to his face. “Ooh!!! No he didn’t!” Harley exclaimed. Ivy gaped at Selina. The woman nodded sagely, holding a glass of champagne. Ivy had painted her nails a dark green and was doing Harley’s in a mix of pink and blue. Selina hadn’t done anything yet, but looking at her he remembered why he was here. Steph had finished his nails, still forbidding him from looking at them, and was now gently blowing on them to dry them. 

“Wheres Jason by the way?” Babs asked Cass, putting curlers in her hair, a mask on her face. Cass shrugged, signing “he comes and goes.” “Todd does these?” Damian asked, looking between his sisters. Cass and Steph snorted. Babs grinned. “Oh yeah. All the time.” “He has some good gossip.” Harley drawled in her Boston accent. Ivy and Lois laughed. “Yes he does. It’s most interesting.” Selina laughed. Damian hadn’t seen her this relaxed in a while. “He’s off with his father right now.” She rolled her eyes. “Something secret.” Ivy wiggled her eyebrows, holding Harley’s hand. “Maybe he’s trying to be cute for you!” Lois said, laughing as Harley did her nails in a deep purple. Babs, Cass, and Steph were quiet. Selina gave them a look. “Maybe.” 

“Alright!” Steph announced. “You can look.” Damian looked down at his nails. They were painted black, but when he rotated his wrists a bit, he could see a green shine glowing underneath. Selina came over and ooohed. “Can you do that for me too, kitten?” She asked Steph. Steph lit up. “Sure!” “Can I braid your hair while she does?” Damian interjected. Selina nodded. “Of course baby.” She sat on the ground and Steph sat between her legs, taking her hands in hers. Damian sat on the couch behind her, running his hands through her thick brown hair. As he separated the strands into sections his nails glowed every so often and he smiled, looking at them. The chatter started up again, each woman talking over the other, laughing as drinks were poured easily. Cass handed him a juice box and he smiled in thanks, stopping his braiding for a second. Selina’s hair was soft, softer than Talias, and thicker too. But it was so much fun to braid. “Wowza birdie!” Steph exclaimed, looking at Selina’s head. “Holy.” Babs muttered. “Can you do my hair next bebs?” Cass asked. Damian smiled, nodding. “Sure.” And in that moment, surrounded by the women in his family, Damian felt he now understood the true meaning of family. And from then on Selina was given the title of Mother. 

(Talia became Talia)

[witchthewriter]

𝐁𝐞𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐢𝐧 𝐚 𝐩𝐨𝐥𝐲 𝐫𝐞𝐥𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬𝐡𝐢𝐩 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐏𝐨𝐢𝐬𝐨𝐧 𝐈𝐯𝐲 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐇𝐚𝐫𝐥𝐞𝐲 𝐐𝐮𝐢𝐧𝐧 𝐰𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝 𝐢𝐧𝐜𝐥𝐮𝐝𝐞

⤷ female, ambiguous race, and any size reader. Requests are open, thank you for reading!  

ᴹᵃˢᵗᵉʳˡᶤˢᵗ      

𝑺𝑭𝑾🌿

⭑ A lot of dance parties with Harley, and you have to pull Ivy into joining 

⭑ Harley really likes ABBA, and you three often watch the Mamma Mia movies

⭑ You all live together, with all separate rooms (so a person can escape whenever they wanted to)

⭑ The place is full of plants, just absolutely hundreds of them; dangling from the ceiling, on window sills, in the bathroom, etc.

⭑ You have a collection of books and Harley will bring you back at least 3 whenever she goes out 

⭑ Ivy is actually super ticklish and whenever she’s upset at what Harley’s done, Harley will chase her around the apartment, trying to get Ivy to forgive her 

⭑ Ivy is always chastising Harley for deliberately getting the lyrics wrong in a song. She does it just to piss her off

⭑ Harley initially thought you and Ivy talking to the plants was stupid, but whenever she thinks she’s alone, you can hear her having full blown conversations with (to) them

⭑ Harley gets upset if she falls asleep on the couch and you guys go to bed. So now you have to carry her to bed. She usually sleeps in the middle while you guys cuddle up next to her

⭑ Ivy beomes really out-going/funny when she’s had a few drinks. And it’s a common occurance for her to break out on song. But she’ll deny it in the morning. 

⭑ Um you guys definitely keep news paper articles about your shenanigans ... okay maybe they shouldn’t be called shenanigans, more like crimes ... 

⭑ Your periods are definitely synched up, but Ivy has plants that can alleviate the cramps. And in the bathroom, there’s an array of pads, tampons, diva cups, re-usable pads etc., (obviously you know who owns which when it comes to reusable ones) 

⭑ Whenever you’re making a promise you and Harley do the pinky thing, but if they’re even bigger promises - or even bets, then you do a spit shake.

⭑ Ivy thinks it’s absolutely disgusting, but she gets so used to it that she joins in too

⭑ Being each other’s best friends 

⭑ Having Selina over for dinner 

⭑ And you guys probably have super obscure pets - like yes, Harley would most definitely have her hyena named Bruce, and Ivy made a living Venus Fly Trap, like one that seems almost sentient and you just want a goddamn dog, or even a cat. But they refuse, and you point out their pets -

⭑ So then they agree

⭑ But you can’t decide what to get 

⭑ And maybe one time when Selina is over for dinner, she says that she found a stray that doesn’t like being around too many other cats, so you say you’ll take him

⭑ But then you realise a few months later that the reason why the cat didn’t like being around other cats was because it wasn’t a he, but a she THAT IS NOW PREGNANT 

⭑ “Awww we’re gonna be grandparents!” Harley cooed when you guys figured it out 

⭑ “Well we can’t have all of them, and Selina already has an apartment full.” Ivy stated, but you wanted to keep all of them so desperately. 

⭑ Your cat still hasn’t given birth yet, but she’s so big that all she can do is lay down all-day. You can find her on your bed, snoozing in the sunlight. 

⭑ And she actually really likes Bruce (the hyena)

⭑ Harley particularly likes to sit on your lap, and Ivy likes to rest her head on your shoulder 

⭑ You usually make dinner 

⭑ Ivy cleans up 

⭑ Harley will go and get the groceries

⭑ Sometimes you do all sleep in the same bed, but the majority of each of your belongings are in your separate rooms

⭑ Harley will leave lipstick marks on your cheek

⭑ And you’ll find red/orange hair in the bathroom, but you can’t deny that you love these women. 

⭑ Theme Song: 

‘Lay All Your Love On Me’ by Pale Honey

⭑ Relationship Tropes: 

  ✧ Touch Either Of My Girlfriends And You Die x3

  ✧ Dumbass (Harley) x Dumbass In Training (You) x Oh God I Guess They’re My Dumbasses (Ivy)

  ✧ Moon (Ivy) x Eclipse (Harley) x Sun (You)

[kumeko]

A/N: For @gcsfanzine ! I love the antics these three get into, with Selina forced into the responsible role because she’s the only one of the three with some conscience.

…

…

…

…

Ivy was sick. Selina took a moment to contemplate the thought, to fully savour the situation she found herself in. Poison Ivy, Pamela Isley, one-woman army and stone-cold bitch, was sick. Sick enough to need help, to ask for help.

And the well-known misanthrope needed Selina’s help.

It was hard enough to think about, let alone believe. Yet, Selina couldn’t doubt the evidence in front of her. Sprawled across Harley’s plush, king-sized mattress, an extremely grumpy Ivy glared at the ceiling. Her fingers tapped the blankets ceaselessly, her jaw clenched so hard Selina could have broken walnuts against it. She looked like a cantankerous alley cat. She also looked entirely out of place buried amongst Harley’s infinite plushies.

How Harley had managed to force Ivy into her bedroom, Selina had no idea. The whole place looked like the residence of a punk princess, a strange hybrid of cute frills and black leather. Neither of the two vibes fit Ivy and put together they just looked even more garish.

“Ahh.” Ivy breathed out harshly before forcing herself up into a seated position. Her red hair clung to her sticky skin, giving her an oddly deflated appearance. There was a reddish tint to her green skin. All in all, she looked like a sick person. A very cranky sick person. “I’m leaving.”

Selina snorted inelegantly. There was the Ivy she knew and tolerated. From across the room, she gestured at the foot of the bed and raised a brow. “How? You broke your leg. And you have a fever.”

Ivy fisted her hand and hit the mattress. A shark plushie fell off the bed. “The fucking hyenas broke it.” Her hair had a life of its own and rose, giving her a lion-like mane. Maybe it sensed its mistress’s rage. “I’ll kill them.”

“You’d be doing me a favour.” Selina wrinkled her nose as she thought of those mangy mutts. The number of times she’d almost lost a cat to them—she should have kicked them out months ago.

“Hey!” Harley growled as she entered the room holding a tray laden with food. She was dressed as a sexy nurse, though that didn’t make her glare any less intimidating as she stomped her foot. “Stop being mean to my babies!”

Selina rubbed her forehead. By now, she should be used to Harley’s level of chaos and nonsense, but somehow the woman continued to surprise her. At least the soup looked decent. “Did you really need the outfit?”

Holding the tray in one hand, Harley arched her back and jutted her hip as she mimicked a pin up poster. “Of course! It’s part of the care package!” She blew a kiss to Ivy. “Don’t you just love it?”

Not caring a wit about the fanservice, Ivy’s expression grew colder than the tundra. “Pick one of them to die or they all will.”

“Neither!” Harley carefully set the soup down on her side table before turning to Ivy. She bent forward and poked her sick friend on the cheek. “I’ll take good care of you in exchange.”

“You’d have to do that anyways!” Ivy swatted her hand away, her scowl only increasing in intensity. “This happened because of you.”

“She has a point, you know.” Selina crossed her arms and leaned against the wall, more than content to just watch the show instead of participating. “We had a deal. Your hyenas are supposed to stay in the basement.”

“They do!” Harley pouted, puffing her cheeks as she glanced up at Selina. “I was only taking them out for a walkie.”

If Harley intended for that to be reassuring, it was the exact opposite. Selina groaned and closed her eyes. There were enough eyes on their shared residence without the hyenas as is. “Oh, so I should expect more missing pet flyers? These things are a nuisance.”

“They’re not things, they’re family.” Between the pig-tails and the pout, Harley was akin to a sulking toddler. Sometimes Selina couldn’t believe that she had a degree and keen intuition. “They just get hungry sometimes but they know better than to mess with you. Or your cats.”

“Oh, and is that why they tackled me?” Ivy asked, her smile as sharp as a razor blade at the slight. “Food? They think I’m weak?”

“They just bumped into you! It’s not their fault you were holding poison. And it didn’t just splash on you, it hit them!” Harley huffed, crossing her arms. She turned up her nose. “Maybe you should be more careful.”

Ivy’s voice dropped dangerously low. “Are you blaming me?”

Selina could practically feel the vines crawling through the pipes and concrete. She groaned. “Don’t break the place, I just finished paying for it.”

“My plants are hungry.” Ivy pushed her hair out of her face, steeling herself as she tried to get up. “Maybe I should give them a snack.”

Harley grabbed her shoulders and firmly pushed her down. “You’re still sick and stop saying that!”

At this rate, Selina was going to get a headache. Or become homeless. It was time to step in. Slowly, she approached the struggling pair. “Harley.” She rested her hand on her shoulder, squeezing it tightly. Just enough that the threat was there. “Next time, the hyenas are gone.”

Harley glanced at her, then looked away. “Fineeee.”

“Great.” Selina turned to Ivy and tried not to smirk. Maybe she should take a picture later, for blackmail. “It’s too late to go back to your room, just live with it.”

Ivy’s frown deepened, as though she heard Selina’s thoughts. “I—” she protested.

Harley cut her off. “If you want to leave, I have to feed you.”

“Huh?” Flabbergasted, Ivy stared at her.

Harley picked up a spoon. She smiled deviously. “Should I pretend this is a train? Or maybe a bee coming to pollinate?”

“…fuck you.” Ivy snatched the spoon.

“Great, we have a deal! I’ll go get a cooling pack.” Harley sprang to her feet. Blowing another kiss, she spun on her heel and skipped out of the room. “Just you wait, I have great patient care.”

“Fifty bucks says she kills you,” Selina said the second Harley disappeared.

“It’s not a bet if we’re both on the same side.” Ivy tucked her hair behind her ear and took a careful sip of the soup. “Huh, not bad.”

“So she really can cook.” Selina shook her head. Was it something Harley had picked up after she’d changed, or was it something a lonely psychiatrist had learned after pulling long shifts? “It’s not poisoned?”

“Probably not.” Ivy took another spoonful. She closed her eyes as she swallowed, as though absorbing information on it. Maybe she could; Selina never fully understood her meta abilities with plants and their poisons. “It’s fine.”

“Maybe I should bet she’ll actually heal you.” Selina reached forward, pressing a hand to Ivy’s neck. “Your fever doesn’t seem that high and if you can talk and eat like that, I guess that other poison didn’t actually hurt you that much.”

Ivy stiffened under her touch and Selina recoiled. They stared at each other for a long moment before Selina looked away. “Force of habit,” she muttered in lieu of an apology.

“Habit?” Ivy lightly touched her neck.

“That…it’s an old memory.” Selina clenched her hand. A very old memory. It had been years since she’d let herself think of her childhood on the streets, even longer since she let herself think of Maggie and Holly and how they used to be.

Ivy studied her before changing the topic. It was oddly tactful of her. “The poison was just a paralysis.”

“But you can move?”

“Barely.” Ivy flopped back on the bed, her hair spreading around her. “I doubt I could actually make it back to my room.”

“And here you were trying to act so strong.” Selina snickered. Maybe she should have let Ivy try, if only to see her flop off the bed and stumble down the hall. “I’ll get you a Tylenol.”

Ivy scowled. “I don’t need any medicine. It’s not like they work on me anyways.”

“That’s why you don’t turn your blood into a pharmacy cocktail,” Selina muttered, rolling her eyes. “Then I’ll just grab one for myself. If I have to keep dealing with your weird foreplay, I’ll need it.”

As she left, she dodged the plush piranha Ivy hurled. “You really are doing better,” Selina teased before disappearing down the hall.

In the distance, she could hear several small thuds as Harley got her care supplies. Clearly, she was going after more than just a cooling pack, and Selina was both scared and curious to find out what it was. Either way, she’d have to especially make sure she didn’t get sick after this. With Ivy’s vindictive personality, Selina would suffer two-fold in Harley’s hands.

A soft nudge shook her out of her stupor. Selina peeked down to find Alexander, a calico tom, brushing against her as she walked. She chuckled, reaching down to give him a good head rub before entering her bedroom.

Perhaps it was because she had worn a costume for years now, whether it was for good or evil, but Selina had a well-stocked medicine cabinet that could rival a drug store. Amidst ordinary painkillers and bandages, there were black market drugs to cover any niche injury. Selina’s finger brushed against each bottle as she checked for more over-the-counter solution.

The first one on the second row froze her.

With shaky fingers, she pulled it out and stared at it. A baby’s cough medicine. Grape flavoured. Only a third of it used. The bottle was brown.

Selina should have tossed it long ago. She should toss it now.

She wasn’t quite ready to let go of that dream, of her daughter returning home.

Pressing her forehead against the cabinet, Selina sighed. Ivy wasn’t the only one vulnerable tonight, it seemed. This wasn’t the time or place for these thoughts. They certainly weren’t the right people to have these thoughts around. Even now, Harley and Ivy still tried to pry into her relationship with Gotham’s protectors, hoping to extract the valuable secret identities she carefully guarded.

Who knew what they’d do if they found out about her daughter or her sister or any of the people Selina had stepped on to get to where she was now?

“This is stupid,” Selina muttered to herself as she returned to Harley’s room. She’d just make sure Ivy was alive, that Harley wasn’t up to no good, and then she’d retire for the day. It had been a trying couple of hours. She’d earned a rest.

“Are you seriously staying all night?” Ivy snarled.

A rest she was definitely not going to get. Selina braced herself as she entered Harley’s room. As expected, Ivy was still lying on the bed, though now with a neon blue ice-pack on her forehead. Her hands kept reaching it, trying to tear it off, but Harley kept swatting them back down.

Harley sniffed. “I have to, you’re too stubborn to heal up otherwise.”

The surprise was Harley. As usual. Perched on the bed right next to Ivy, she wrapped an arm around Ivy’s shoulders to hold her in place. The bowl of soup next to her was half-finished, so Selina didn’t have to worry if Ivy would starve tonight. On Ivy’s knees, a laptop perched precariously.

Noticing her return, Harley waved. “You’re back!”

“I thought I should keep the house in one piece,” Selina drawled, glancing at Ivy. “Ivy too, I guess.”

“Like you’d last ten minutes with just her,” Ivy scoffed, not buying the bluff.

“We’re watching a movie,” Harley interrupted, grinning. “Wanna join?”

“I…” Selina pursed her lips, her excuse on the tip of her tongue.

“Please?” Harley begged, batting her eyes. “With a cherry on top.”

“If you leave me alone with her, I’ll kill you.” Ivy crossed her arms as she leaned back, accepting her fate. “Sit on the bed but don’t get too comfortable. The second it’s done, you’re both out.”

“Comfortable?” Selina laughed, slipping into the empty space. “Like a cactus like you would let me.”

She didn’t need the reminder. She already knew better. The moment Selina got comfortable with them, the moment she spilled her secrets, these quiet moments would come to an end.

And she wasn’t sure if she was ready for that.

[justrandomfanfictionskh]

A Blue Brid and a Black Cat pt 13

(Selina decides that Marinette would be better as the Cat than Adrien. Five years, later Dick is very confused about this Lady Noire)

ao3 Beginning Previous

A great cheer echoed through the Scarlet Scar Bar, as the Gotham Sirens toasted Marinette’s successful second first mission as Ladybug. There was no one to witness their joy except for two passed out drunks, a tired bartender, and a few rats, but the energy of the four costumed Ladies in the corner booth was enough to make the place feal as if it was the busiest joint in the whole city.

“To Lady Noire!” Harley cried with her arm around Ivy, glass high in the air. “For taking ass and kicking names!”

“I did not take ass,” Lady Noire said with a role of her eyes.

“Oh really?” Ivy said after knocking back a shot. “Then what’s this I hear about a certain Blue Bird chasing a Black Cat through the Bat Cave?”

Lady Noire was grateful that her mask hid her blush as she knocked back her own shot. Ever since she had transformed into Ladybug, maintaining her masks had become...challenging and now her Marinette was showing. She had to be careful if she didn't want to spiral. But all she said to Ivy was, “He’s not interested.”

“Oh, yes he is!” Catwoman purred. “You should have seen him this morning. Raving about Ladybug, pining for Lady Noire, he asked about you three times when I told him I was meeting tonight.”

“Oooh!” Harley cried halfway on the table. “The kitten has caught her first bird! Like mother like daughter!”

Now Lady Noire was hiding her blush in her glass for a completely different reason. The two felines had never had the “labels” talk. They had been so much for each other over the years, it was almost impossible to sum up everything into a simple word. Not to mention the fact that Selina was different things depending on which mask Marinette was wearing. How did she even begin to categorize their five years of friendship, mentorship, love, support, and care? Lady Noire glanced at Cat Woman trying to gauge her reaction, but she was only smiling with love and pride as she sipped her own drink.

“So,” Catwoman said, “What happens now?”

“Mm,” Lady Noire said leaning back, “Now I alternate between masks until I find my counterpart. According to the Masters when one manifest soul is born, so is their balance. Which means somewhere out there in the world, is another fluid soul balanced between Order and Chaos, just like me.”

“And then?” Ivy asked.

“Who cares?!” Harley cried at the top of her lungs. “We’re celebrating! The Cat has caught the Bat. The Kitten is leaving the nest. The Bug is back and causing chaos. And we are having fun! The only thing that can make this night any better…is…is if we beat up the Joker! Hell yeah, who’s with me?!”

“Harley you’re drunk,” Catwoman said fondly.

“No, I’m not!” Harley cried.

“She hasn’t even finished her first glass,” Ivy pointed out. The other three Sirens watched in amusement as Harley began to dance around the bar to music only she could hear.

Lady Noire laughed. The lightness that came with the chaos energy swirling within her made everything bright and cheerful. And the women who were surrounding her made the energy sing with joy. There was so much potential for chaos here, that Lady Noire was practically itching. But there was still the order. The weight of creation was still resting in her heart, grounding the flighty and wantonness of the destruction and creating…peace. For the first time in almost ten years, Lady Noire was at peace.

Not all of her problems were solved. Her identity was still splintered into half a dozen masks, that she had no idea how to bring together. There was still the threat on the horizon coming steadily closer and closer. And the League of Assassins was just waiting for her to mess up and fall into one of their traps. But in that moment…in that moment it didn’t matter because she was balanced, and surrounded by the people she loved. Everything else could wait.

“You know what,” Lady Noire said setting down he glass, “We should do something.”

Harley gasped in excitement, but Ivy was quick to say, “We are not breaking into Arkham to beat up the Joker!” Harley pouted but smiled as she slunk into her girlfriend’s arms with a giggle.

“Hmm,” Catwoman purred, “Well, I might have an idea. But you all have to promise to be on your best behavior.”

“Never, what ’cha a got kitty cat?” Harley cried.

Nightwing gritted his teeth as the windowless van pulled up in front of the run-down apartment building. He hadn’t even been back a day before Batman had called them all to order with news of a human trafficking ring operating near the harbor. Now as much he loved electrocuting slavers until their teeth shattered, he hated the aftermath. The broken kids, most of them Damian’s age, staring at nothing, refusing to cry. The hollowed-out girls who flinched when they were touched. No one should have to endure that torture, so while he was looking forward to beating the crap out of the scum, he was not eager for the horrors they would see afterwards.

“The target just pulled up, they're unloading their latest victims now. Standing by for orders.”

“Red Hood in position. B are you sure I can’t use the real bullets for this one?”

“Only in Crime Alley,” came the gruff response through the comms. “Everyone check in.”

“Spoiler standing by. And for the record, I’m with Hood. Oh yeah, Orphan’s with me.”

“Robin in position. And they are right, Father. These animals do not deserve the air they are polluting with their mere existence.”

“Wow! Demon spawn agreeing with Hood. Never thought I’d see the day! Oh, Red Robin standing by.”

“Catwoman in position.” A silky voice spoke through the comms causing everyone to jump.

“What?” Hood exclaimed before.

“I’m heeere! Batsy! Did you miss me?” The too loud voice of Harley Quinn echoed through the comms setting Nightwing’s ear ringing as Batman growled,

“Harley how are you on this channel?”

“Catwoman invited us,” Ivy said coolly, as unseen as the others. “She said you were having a party and invited us.”

“This is not a party,” Robin snarled. “This is a mission.”

“You’re raiding a human trafficking ring correct?” Catwoman purred from somewhere in the night, probably near Batman.

“Yes,” Red Robin said slowly.

“So we get to kick sickos in the nuts!” Harley cried.

“I guess?” Spoiler said hesitatingly.

“Sounds like a party to me!”

“GEEZE!” Nightwing yelped and he spun to see Lady Noire leaning casually against the roof’s railing with a sly smile. Her braid swished lazily as her feline eyes watched him in amusement. “What the hell? Don’t sneak up on me like that!”

“You should be more aware of you surroundings Blue Bird,” Lady Noire said walking slowly to crouch beside him. “So I heard you met Ladybug, how’d you like her?”

“Um,” Nightwing said confused by her too knowing smile and laughing eyes, “She was very impressive. Why have you talked to her?”

“Only briefly,” she said her grin stretching, as she sung under her breath, “Hey! Macarena!”

Nightwing groaned, but before he could snipe back, Batman growled through the comms, “I’m going to only ask this one more time. What are you doing here?”

“Calm down Batsy, we’re celebrating!” Harley cried.

“Celebrating?” Red Robin said skeptically. “By joining a raid?”

“What exactly are you celebrating, and why wasn’t I invited?” Red Hood almost yelled through the comms.

“Today,” Lady Noire said gently, and Nightwing had to do a double take as she continued, “Is the five year anniversary of me taking the Black Cat Miraculous, and Catwoman becoming my mentor. We went out for drinks, and now we’re here to cause some chaos. Want to join?”

“This is our raid!” Robin growled.

“And we will be happy for the assistance Baby Bat,” Ivy said as Robin hissed.

But Nightwing wasn’t paying attention. Something had happened to Lady Noire in the moment she had been speaking. The nostalgia of the anniversary must have gotten to her, because her face had transformed from predatory glee into something soft and gentle. It was strange on the usually carefree and wild woman, but Nightwing thought it suited her. As if it was glimpse behind the mask she to the real her, like the glimpse he had gotten that morning after the gala. He studied her and then furrowed his brow in confusion.

Lady Noire must have sensed his gaze, because she turned to face him with casual curiosity. “What?” she asked as her braid flicked.

“When did you change your costume?” he asked.

She blinked, and Nightwing was startled to see the flash of surprise and confusion catch on her face. “What?” she said as she shot up and began examining her suit.

Nightwing tilted his head in confusion and then pointed, “You’re shoulder poldrons. Those are new right? When did you get them?”

Lady Noire blinked as she stared at the new pieces of armor. They were black but lined in green, like how Ladybug's were lined in red. She seemed as baffled as him, which only confused Nightwing more. But before she could explain, a new voice broke over the comms.

“Not that this isn’t fun or anything,” Oracle said with some obvious exasperation. “But the boss just finished examining his ‘merchandise.’” She audiblely shivered in disgust, and Nightwing felt like following suit, as she continued. “I suggest you incorporate the Sirens into the plan B, cause its now or never, he’s about to leave.”

“Very well,” Batman said betraying no emotion, except a vague sense of frustration. “Ivy keep anyone from escaping. Harley stay with Hood. Catwoman with me. Lady Noire with Nightwing. No killing!”

“Not even a little bit Batsy?” Harley wined.

“No killing,” Batman growled even firmer than before.

“You do realize, you just put Red Hood and Harley Quinn on the same team,” Spoiler said, her devilish smile evident in her voice. “Right Bats?”

There was a pregnant pause before, Red Hood shouted, “No take backs! Everyone, move in!”

“WOOHOO!” Harley yelled, and Nightwing saw two figures in red and black charge into the building. Batman cursed as Catwoman and Ivy cackled, but they charged in all the same. Nightwing turned to Lady Noire and smiled. She was laughing softly, her posture gentle and relaxed like she had been when she had curled up against Selina during movie night. He wondered if she had changed personas again, or if this was just that other person leaking through. He hadn’t asked what to call that other mask he had seen during their movie night, or if it really was a mask. But now wasn’t the time to ask.

Instead he just gave a light bow and gestured to the building. “After you Black Cat.”

“Thank you, Blue Bird.” She said her mischievous smile returning was she used her magical staff to propel herself off of the roof. Nightwing watched her for a second before smiling softly and following. Tonight, might have just ended up better than he was expecting.

Next

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[sheep33hallow]

Piercing CH 10

Rating G

Pre-SuperBat, drabble, Past Mpreg, Past Selina/Bruce

____

Whenever Bruce is questioned by the media on his dating or marriage status, he always says he’s someone’s second spouse, and until he’s going to raise his kids until said spouse shows up. 

He’s always said it as a joke. He never believed his own words, because the thought of writing up such an iron clad prenup, along with making sure his children have his home made the idea of getting married sound exhausting. 

He was happy, and content, but also busy. 

Too busy. 

It would take someone more insane than him to keep up with him, and that person didn’t exist. So, he’ll continue to say what he’s been saying. 

He’s someone’s second spouse. 

_________

When he first meets Jon, he can’t help but sniff the top of his head. He’s three months old, and his youngest are one, having recently lost their infant smell. He did not realize how much he would miss it. 

They’re sitting in the nursery, Helena, and Terry are napping in their play pin, while they sit on the floor together. Bruce lays against a huge snorlax, Dick got him as a gift, but he’s ended up using more than Bruce since he likes to stare at the twins. 

They’re the first babies in the manor! Dick says. 

These two were not made on purpose. He’s shared many heats with Selena throughout the years, yet last year seemed to be when the stars aligned, and deemed him ready to produce. 

He’s grateful to have had them later in life. He could not have imagined doing this with just Alfred with him. Now with the boys, and even members of the Justice League coming by, and also the occasional Harley Quinn and Ivy since they’re half criminal, is what Harley calls them. 

He sniffs Jon’s head again. 

“It almost makes me want to have another one.” Bruce kisses the top of his head. 

“That’s not what Lois is saying.” Clark chuckles. “She’s feeling overwhelmed.” 

Bruce rocks Jon a bit. He hums in response. “Well, hire a nanny.” 

“Ma is staying with us. I don’t think I can afford a nanny.” 

“But you think you can afford daycare?” Bruce snorts. 

“I don’t have to pay daycare insurance.” 

“Hmm, you might if he has your laser eyes, and strength.” 

Clark reaches out, and takes one of Bruce’s feet, and places it on his lap. He massages it, making Bruce let out a high pitched hum of appreciation. “Don’t remind me.” Clark says. “Think the Justice League would see up a daycare?” Clark jokes. 

“We all adopt teens, or have human babies. Well unlike Dina and Oliver’s daughter who’s nursery windows are made of plexiglass.” He shoves his other foot onto Clark’s lap. “You’ll be fine, Clark. Your human parents did well with you. Half- Kyprtonian should be child’s play.” 

Clark gives him a small smile. 

“What?” Bruce says with his own smile. 

Clark shrugs. “You know it would be nice to see you pregnant again.” Bringing up Bruce’s earlier comment. 

Bruce starts to laugh, then catches himself from being too loud. “Go say those things to your wife, farm boy.”

______

When the twins are ten, they find out about Damien. 

Selena is sitting at the table with him, while the twins are outside with Damien, and Jon. Terry didn’t take too kindly to having his youngest status taken from him, and he and Damien have been fighting since he’s come to live with them. 

Damien has been winning the fights, but not without his own bruises. Harley begged for god mother status, so the twins know how to fight dirty. Much to Bruce’s chagrin. 

Jason is outside with them to keep watch, though Bruce thinks he’s outside more for entertainment than to keep the peace. 

“When you have such a straight laced Alpha who follows you around like a puppy, I don’t see why you’re always dipping your toes into Arkham Asylum.” Selena says. She whispers a thank you to Alfred when he hands her her tea. 

“Clark is married.” 

“You’re the one always talking about second spouse, and all that.” She takes a sip, moans at the flavor, giving Alfred a thumbs up. 

He nods his head toward her. 

“To the media. I don’t believe in marriage.”

Alfred, who has turned around to make sandwiches for them, snorts. 

“I heard that.” 

“I wasn’t trying to be subtle.” Alfred counters. 

Bruce sighs. “She visited a little bit after the twins were born.” Then narrows his eyes at Selena. “And you weren’t the most cozy person to be around then.” 

Selena has no shame. She gives him a cheshire grin as he continues to speak. 

“And I needed some comfort.” 

“And she got pregnant.” Said Selena. 

“And she hid it for nine years until it felt best for her to tell me.” He looks outside the window. Damien’s tan skin glows beautifully next to the ghostly pale children he had with Selena. Helena is currently a model for a few luxury brands, while Terry has gotten into dirt biking. His first tournament was last year, and since then he’s been placing in the top five each time. He’s often hanging around Lucius, learning the in’s and outs of building his own bike at some point. 

Helena doesn’t speak much. She prefers the indoors, she’s currently getting into gardening as well. He had to have a talk with Pamela when Helena asked if she could learn from her. 

Ivy promised she’d be careful, that nothing that talks or moves on its own would be taught. 

Yet. 

Bruce chose to ignore what she left unsaid. 

Selena scoffed. “As if you’re not happy to have another one of you roaming around.” 

Bruce didn’t deny it. 

“Also Talia is a nice pick, but I'd go for an alien. Ya know. To spice it up.” She smirks into her sip. 

Bruce ignores hers. Taking this opportunity to tell her about the kids upcoming events. 

[hufflepuffwritingstuff2]

Gotham City Sirens Sickfic- part 2

Part 1

Y/N stirred as she heard voices coming from somewhere in the apartment.

“Kitty! Ivy! You’re home!”

“Harley, why is there a girl in my bed?” A voice asked.

“She’s sick, Selina! I found her on the street, I had to do something!”

“If she’s sick, Harley, then why didn’t you take her to a hospital?” Another voice asked.

“Can you really see me rolling up to the ER in my clown get-up, Ivy? Besides, I knew the best medicine was here. That new plant you were working on has great healing properties-”

Y/N groaned before she could stop herself. She just wanted to go back to sleep, where she wasn’t sick and her entire body didn’t hurt.

“Girls, she’s waking up,” The second voice said.

“Great,” the first voice added, “just what we need- someone to know where our base is.”

“She wouldn’t tell anyone, Kitty- why would she? She’s got no reason, not after we help her get better. Besides, maybe she could be one of us!”

“Harley, you can’t just go around and adopt the first stray person you see.” The second voice said, “she probably has a family that’s looking for her.”

“Here’s what we’re going to do,” the first voice added, “we’re going to wait until she falls asleep, then we’re dropping her off at the hospital, okay?”

Y/N struggled to sit up. She opened her eyes and saw three of Gotham City’s most dangerous criminals arguing about what to do with her. Harley Quinn, Catwoman, and Poison Ivy. Slowly, Y/N slid out of the bed and crept across the room. She didn’t get very far before a string of coughs gave away her position. The three women turned their heads in the direction of Y/N’s coughing.

“Doll, I thought I told you to stay in bed!” Harley said.

“Please,” Y/N said, “I need to go. I have to get home. I-”

“You sound terrible,” Catwoman winced, “Harley, did you take her temperature?”

“One hundred and four as of a few hours ago,” Harley replied.

“Let’s check it again,” Poison Ivy said, “she looks awful.”

Poison Ivy approached Y/N, thermometer in hand.

“Please, don’t hurt me, I-”

“Quiet, Flower,” Ivy shushed, “no one’s going to hurt you. Open your mouth.”

Before Y/N could react, the thermometer was back in her mouth. Y/N watched cross-eyed as the number quickly climbed higher and higher until it reached its peak at 104.6 degrees. It started beeping, signaling for Poison Ivy to take it out. She read the number on the thermometer, then shook her head.

“Well, what’s it say?” Catwoman asked.

“It’s one hundred four point six. I don’t know, Selina, I wouldn’t try to move her at this point.”

Catwoman let out a dramatic sigh.

“Fine,” she said, “but as soon as she’s well again, she goes.”

“I-I’m sure I can just go home,” Y/N piped up, “I don’t want to take up any more of your time, and I’d really rather just go back to my apartment.”

“Sorry, Kitten,” Catwoman said, “You’re way too sick to go anywhere right now, except that bed.”

Catwoman looped Y/N’s arm over her shoulder and escorted her back to the bed.

“Besides,” she added, “you’ve seen way too much of our base for us to let you leave right now.”

Catwoman set Y/N down on the bed and pulled the covers up to her chin.

“I need to make a call,” she said.

“Anything we can get for you, Doll?” Harley asked.

Y/N shook her head. She was too scared and too tired at the moment to ask for anything. Y/N let her eyelids drift closed. Maybe this was all a dream, and she’d wake up tomorrow, safe in her own apartment.

Part 3

[dessarious]

How the Sirens Adopted a Ladybug Pt5

AO3  Beginning   Previous   Next

They ate mostly in silence with Ladybug refusing to look at any of them. The Kwami were all cuddled up against her obviously trying to offer emotional support. Every time she managed to calm herself down Selina would look over at the girl and her rage would build up again. She was going to have to find an outlet for it in order to stay here.

“So why haven’t you asked for help from the European Justice League?” The full body flinch she got in response gave her a target for that rage. She mumbled something that Selina couldn’t hear. “What was that?”

“I don’t think they believed anything was happening. Eventually they just told me that if I couldn’t handle butterflies I shouldn’t consider myself a hero. They had real problems to deal with.” Oh she was definitely sicking Bruce on those idiots once she figured out what was going on. “In their defense once I cast my cure there’s no visible damage so unless one of them had been here during an attack it really doesn’t seem real.” Great, now she was making excuses for heroes who absolutely should know better.

“I don’t care what they thought, that’s unacceptable behavior. You mentioned something about others that were helping you?” She flinched and curled in on herself.

“You should tell them. Plagg’s right, I think they can help.” Most of the other Kwami looked surprised at Tikki’s words. Ladybug somehow just seemed to get smaller.

“Kiddo, the three of us are the last to judge, trust me. We just want to help.” Harley’s voice was gentle and the girl peeked at her before looking back at her hands. Plagg flew up to her shoulder and was whispering in her ear. Eventually she took a deep breath and pulled her knees into her chest.

“At first it was just Chat Noir and me. It was okay for a while. He was always goofing around and flirting but he was there. But things happened and he didn’t want there to be secrets even though it was for our own safety. The Guardian chose what information we got when and he trusted me more than he did Chat, especially the more he pushed. He let me choose temporary holders and that just pissed Chat off more. He started becoming unreliable. Not showing up to fights, spending patrols trying to convince me to reveal my identity. Then he revealed himself to the other holders and got them to do the same. I refused and he convinced the others that I wasn’t trustworthy. I had to take his Miraculous. Too many people knew who he was. After that I couldn’t use any of the others even if they had been willing and I didn’t know anyone else I could trust. Then the Guardian… he got sick and turned his responsibilities over to me. So now I use whichever Miraculous I need for any given battle.”

“And what about your living situation?” She shook her head but it seemed more like an automatic reaction than an answer.

“That could compromise my identity.” Plagg and Tikki both flew in front of her face with their arms crossed.

“You need to tell them. Keeping your identity from Chat and the others was necessary and as we’ve seen showed good instincts on your part, but this is different.” Tikki’s voice sounded encouraging but strained. Their worry was obvious.

“But-”

“No buts Kit.” Plagg pointed to Selina. “She’s one of mine and there’s no malice toward you in any of them. We’re done watching you suffer alone. Not to mention you haven’t had a chance to breathe in months let alone grieve properly.” Selina shared a confused look with the other two. Plagg referring to her as theirs was odd but she was more worried about the grieving comment. Tears welled in Ladybug’s eyes and she shook her head again.

“I can’t.” The words were choked and the rest of the Kwami cuddled further into the girl while Plagg and Tikki just looked at each other.

“Will you let us tell them?” She hunched in further on herself but before she could say anything Tikki let out a string of what sounded like curses. Selina had no idea what language it was in. “There’s an Akuma.” Ladybug let out a tired breath.

“What time is it?”

“School just started. Which one do you think it is this time?” Plagg’s snark just got annoyed noises from all the Kwami. Ladybug stood and started towards the window. “Kit you’re not transformed.”

“Oh right.” Tikki disappeared and there was another flash of light around the girl.

“Why don’t we go with you? I’d like to see exactly what’s going on.” She frowned in thought.

“If you want, but I need you to stay back and not interfere. It’s bad enough trying to keep the others out of harm's way and I really don’t have the energy to look after anyone else and still defeat the Akuma.” As soon as she said it she was out the window.

“What do you think she meant by others?” Harley sounded like she had a guess at the answer, but wanted someone to give her a different one.

“I have a bad feeling that her former help are still trying to pretend they’re heroes. That or they’re actively trying to sabotage her. Or possibly both.” Given what had been said about Chat Noir, she wouldn’t be surprised.

“We should head out and find a good vantage point.” Ivy was just staring out the window but it seemed like she was looking inward.

“I just need to grab my jacket. And for now we respect her wish for no interference, unless it’s a matter of life and death for her, agreed?” Harley and Ivy both gave a nod but neither looked happy about it. Ten minutes later, as they stood on a roof watching Ladybug taking hits for a bunch of idiots who wouldn’t leave the area, Selina wasn’t either. As soon as the fight was over they moved in closer to see what the morons had to say for themselves.

“Looking a bit ragged there M’Lady. Are you ready to admit you were wrong yet? All I want is an apology and a reveal and things can go back to the way they were.” Selina had to grab Harley to stop her from lunging at the boy who spoke but Ladybug shot him a flat look.

“Go back to what exactly? You refusing to respect my boundaries and throwing tantrums during a fight, or you just not showing up at all?” The boy sputtered indignantly and she turned to leave but a different one, the one who’d been possessed started yelling at her.

“Aren’t you even going to ask what upset me so much I got Akumatized? You used to actually care about people.” Ladybug just crossed her arms and waited. “Someone I thought was my friend just moved away without telling anyone! Can you believe that?” That just brought a confused look from the hero as she scanned the others assembled. For some reason that seemed to annoy the girl more. “Marinette! She just up and left without telling anyone!”

“I’m sorry, did you all just now notice she was gone?” Disbelief was the main thing in her tone, but there was hurt there as well.

“What do you mean just now? Don’t act like it’s our fault she decided to bail on her friends.” Ladybug was just staring at all of them like they’d lost their minds.

“Some friends considering it took you six months to notice she was missing in the first place.” There was a blonde girl leaning against a nearby building that Selina would swear wasn’t there a minute about.

“She’s not missing. Her parents sold their business and the family moved.” The blonde looked like she was going to fire back but Ladybug spoke first.

“Believe what you want, you always do. This is not something I’m going to stand here and argue about. I’m sorry you feel hurt but there’s nothing I can do to help the situation.” She tried to leave again.

“Wait!” The blond practically jogged up to her. “I need to speak with you, alone.” Ladybug hesitated. “Please, it’s important.” The hero searched the girls face for a moment before giving a small nod. The others immediately started shouting at her so she grabbed the other girl and headed to a nearby roof. They followed silently and Selina watched as they both stood awkwardly.

“So what do you need to talk to me about Chloe?” There was a wariness to Ladybug's tone and stance, almost like she expected to be yelled at or attacked. The other girl just seemed nervous.

“A couple things. You knew Marinette was missing, do you know where she is?” Ladybug’s entire body tensed up at the question and Chloe saw it. “I’m not asking you to tell me I just… I just want to know if she’s okay. The police are refusing to look for her, claiming she went to live with relatives out of the country even though her passport hasn’t been used, and she hasn’t touched her back accounts since the day after…” She trailed off, obviously not wanting to finish the thought.

“How do you know she hasn’t… you’ve been using your father’s accounts to check the police progress haven’t you?” She just gave a sheepish shrug. “Why? You hated Marinette.” Chloe flinched.

“No I didn’t. We were rivals sure, and I was overall a bitch yes, but I never hated her. We were just so different and… I mean you’ve met my parents. I was taught from a young age that I was above everyone else and that they should be grateful for my notice. Mari… I couldn’t understand for the longest time why she stood up to me. I know it sounds stupid and I can’t really explain it better.” She sounded frustrated but it actually seemed to calm Ladybug down for some reason. “Look, I understand why she wouldn’t want to come back to school. Those ungrateful peasants made her life a living hell, but it’s like she completely dropped off the face of the earth. I can’t even imagine what losing both her parents in an accident like that must have done to her.”

“She’s okay. She just didn’t want to be sent out of Paris, or put into the system.” It didn’t sound like a lie but Ladybug was refusing to look the other girl in the eye for some reason. Chloe was just frowning in thought.

“If you see her again… tell her I can help if she wants. I know I’m probably the last person she wants to deal with but if she needs a place to stay no questions asked, I’m offering. Daddy has a few judges that owe him favors as well so we can probably get her emancipated so she can at least get to her money without worrying about someone tracking her and putting her somewhere she doesn’t want to be.” Ladybug nodded but from her position Selina could see her fighting back tears. “The other thing I wanted to talk about…”

“Yes?” Chloe still hesitated. She looked worried.

“That comment Adrien made, about you looking ragged… he wasn’t wrong.” Ladybug curled in on herself and Chloe panicked. “I’m not say it as a criticism! Ever since those rejects abandoned you it’s obvious things have been getting worse. I don’t know what you home situation is like but it’s kind of obvious it’s less than great.”

“If you’re going to try and convince me to give you a Miraculous-”

“No! No, it’s nothing like that. I just… here.” She pushed something into the hero’s hand and Ladybug just looked at it in confusion.

“What…” Chloe cleared her throat nervously.

“I had part of my floor renovated into a sort of efficiency apartment. That key is to get in through the balcony. The door that leads to the rest of my suite has multiple locks, including bolts that go into the floor that can only be accessed from the inside.” Ladybug blinked at her, not seeming to process what the girl said. “It’s a safe place… if you need it.” There was a long pause then Ladybug lurched forward, pulling the other girl into a hug.

“Thank you.”  The words were soft, almost inaudible, but the emotion behind them was heartbreaking.

AO3 Beginning   Previous    Next

Ko-Fi

Tags

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[prettykittykyle-blog]

ship tag dump

[marauderundercover]

Taking Chances Bonus Chapter: Harley VS Bruce

AO3

Ch. 18 (main fic)

Master list

Harley Quinn was a lot of things. Psychologist, ex-villain, ex-girlfriend of one of the biggest assholes in Gotham. Girlfriend of the lovely Pamela Isley, and best friend of the amazing Selina Kyle. She was now also the proud aunt of the adorable sunshine that is Marinette Wayne. What she wasn’t, though, was someone who gave up easily. Which is why she originally texted Bruce Wayne once she woke up this morning. She texted him and then intended on getting ready to go out to breakfast with her three favorite girls. She did not intend for Bruce Wayne to come and knock on her apartment door. 

Harley glares at the man standing in front of her, not amused by his claims. So what if he says the kid is his “biological daughter” and that she has “no claim” on her. To hell with him, that adorable ray of sunshine was hers now. She was officially one of the girls. And she was not backing down easily. Her text was supposed to reassure him that Marinette would be safe with her and the other Sirens. Not make him rush down here to try to take her back before the girl had even had breakfast. This just wouldn’t do. 

“Harley, please. Marinette is my daughter and-”

“But you already have so many kids! And the kid really likes us.” Harley argues, pouting. Mr. “I dress like a bat for fun” was not about to take Mari away from them. 

“I understand that Harley, and she can still come to visit. But she’s not living with you.” Bruce says, putting his foot down. Who would’ve guessed one night with the Sirens would be enough for them to try and adopt his daughter out from underneath him. 

“Or, you could always come and visit her while we have full custody. Makes more sense to me!” Harley counters with a wide grin.

“I don’t even have custody of her, she’s just visiting Gotham for the summer.” Bruce says tiredly. Harley frowns. 

“Whatdya mean you don’t have custody? Who does? Her mom?” She asks. 

“Her adoptive parents in France.” Bruce says shortly. Harley gasps. 

“France? Well then forget this fight, I’ve got a flight to catch.” She says, whirling around to leave. Bruce stops her, gently grabbing her wrist. 

“She loves her parents, Harley. And they’re letting her see me and stay here in Gotham for the summer, something I never expected them to agree to. If you go in guns blazing, they’re never going to let either of us see her again.” He points out, letting go of her wrist once he guesses she won’t run. 

“But that’s not fair!” She whines, stomping her foot. The summer was so short! There wouldn’t be enough time to spend with the kid if B man was insisting on also spending time with her. That wouldn’t work. It just wouldn’t. 

“I’m sorry, Harley. But she has a life in France. We can’t be selfish.” Bruce says. Harley scoffs. 

“Fuck that. Maybe you can’t, but I sure as hell can.” Harley says, crossing her arms. Bruce sighs, pinching the bridge of his nose. 

“Harley-”

“No! No more Harley this or Harley that. Marinette is staying with me and Ivy and Selina and that is final!” She says. 

“The hell it is! Listen, Harley, I’m trying to work with you here. Really, I am. But I went almost fifteen years without knowing about my daughter. I’m not about to give her up now just because you think she fits in well with the other Sirens!” Bruce argues, finally letting some anger seep through. Marinette was his daughter, damnit. He already had extremely limited time with her and while he would never stop Marinette from seeing the Sirens (as long as they weren’t doing anything too illegal), he wasn’t going to just let her live there. 

“Uh...what’s going on here?” Marinette asks, blinking sleepily as she looks between her dad and her newly adopted Aunt who appeared to be having a standoff right outside the apartment. With both her and Harley still in pajamas. Lovely.  

“Nothing pumpkin, go back inside.” Harley says, squeezing her shoulder. 

“No, Marinette, come on honey. We’re going home.” Bruce says. Marinette frowns. 

“Selina said we were gonna come back later. We’re supposed to go grab breakfast with Aunt Harley and Ivy first.” She says. He starts to say something, then stops. Staring at her pants before sighing. 

“Are the two of you really in Batman and Robin pajama pants?” He asks, exasperation filling his voice. 

“Yeah- Dad what’s wrong? If I really have to go home right now I will. I just thought Selina told you where we were. And when we’d be back.” Marinette says, confused as to how this whole situation started. 

“She did. And I was fine with it. I know how stressed you’ve been, sweetheart. But then Harley texted me-”

“We don’t have to talk about that.” Harley says, laughing nervously. Marinette narrows her eyes. 

“Aunt Harley, what’d you do?” She asks, sticking her hands on her hips to try to look more intimidating. 

“Sweets, I just wanted you to be able to stay here with me and Selina and your Aunt Ivy.” She says, smiling awkwardly. Marinette turns to her dad, quirking an eyebrow up. 

“She informed me, via text message, that you would not be returning to the manor. And that no amount of money could make her return you, that you were happy and fine and you made a great addition to her little family.” Bruce says. Marinette turns to Harley and launches herself at her, wrapping her arms around the woman. 

“Aunt Harley, I love you. And I’ll always be part of your family, but I have to go home at some point. I just met my brothers and dad recently, and I have years to make up for. Besides, I’m sure this isn’t the last time Maman and Papa will let me come to Gotham. I’m not just gonna forget you because I’m across town.” Marinette says, hugging Harley tightly. Harley sighs, but wraps her arms around the girl and returns the hug. 

“I know you won’t sugar, I’m just gonna miss you. You fit in so well here.” She says softly. Marinette sighs. 

“I’m not even leaving yet. We’re still gonna go get breakfast, right? And besides, you have my number now. And Selina already said we have to have a girl’s night every week for the rest of the summer, and I don’t know about you, but I’m not gonna go against Selina.” Marinette reminds her with a grin. Harley snorts. 

“Fine, fine. Only because you want to see your dad and brothers for some weird reason. But the second you get tired of them, you can come live with Auntie Harley.” She insists. Bruce opens his mouth to object, but Marinette cuts him off. 

“Of course.” She says, giving her another quick hug before turning to look at her dad. “See ya later dad, I’m gonna go change for breakfast.” She says, giving him a quick hug before going back into the apartment. 

“I win.” Harley says with a smirk. “Conditionally.” 

“I- fine. Conditionally. Please be cautious of what you say while out for breakfast. She’s not quite ready to be announced as a Wayne.” Bruce says.

“Whatever you say, B-man.” Harley says with a half-hearted salute. Bruce simply sighs before walking away. Harley grins. She definitely won this round.

Tag list: @megawhitleycalderonpaganus @vixen-uchiha @stainedglassm @liquid-luck-00 @jayjayspixiepop @jjmjjktth @mizzy-pop @trippingovermyfeet @queenz-z @thepaceperson @iloontjeboontje @waiting247 @laurcad123 @toodaloo-kangaroo @ritacrow-blog @deathssilentapproach-blog @kittenmywaythrulife @nerd-nowandforever @tazanna-blythe @jaybird-and-co @jumpingjoy82

[miraculous-trinity-leo]

Tᕼᗴ ᑕᕼᗩOTIᑕ ᗩᑎᘜᗴᒪ

(Part 1) (Part 2) (Part 3) (Part 4) (Part 5) (Part 6)

Chapter 3: Au Revoir Gotham My True Home

•—–—–·†·–—–—•

Marinette explained what happened and that she didn't mean to cause trouble, she didn't know why the bats were looking for her (author to audience... it's because she looks like one of his bat kids gone rouge.) When she asked how they knew the Bat was looking for her, she found out that Selina was actually dating the Bat... So Marinette was very surprised at that, her family talked about it and a few days after her birthday she'll be going to Paris, France with Selina to be with a family friend of hers. Marinette was now really thinking she was cursed, but she made sure to take it in stride and spend as much time with her friends and family as possible.

"Doan wawhry suguh, we'll make sure tuh visit as much as possible, yuh can even visit us durin' summuh and wintuh break." - Harley held back the tears as she hugged Marinette, Bud, Lou, Ivy, Selina, Ed and even Frank joined in on it.

……… ………

Marinette was out with her friends still not sure how to tell them, she started with the obvious.

"Sooo... tomorrow I turn 10... the double digits." - Marinette

"Soon you'll be one of us!" - Garfield gave Marinette a side hug with a big smile, god he made it harder to tell them

"So what do you want to do? We can celebrate, tomorrow and the day after that, and the day after that, heck we can celebrate for the whole week while we're at it!" - Garfield

Rachel noticed the sad smile Marinette had as Garfield continued talking.

"Is there something you need to tell us?" - Rachel's words stoped Garfield in his tracks, he then looked at a slightly teary Marinette, and he felt a slight tinge of pain in his chest.

"I- um, I'm moving this Saturday... I'm sorry I really don't want to, but- *hic* I-" - Marinette was cut off by Garfield giving her a hug, he rubbed small circles on her back as she let out a few sobs. Rachel patting her shoulder to try and comfort her.

After they were like that for a few minutes, they decided to get ice cream

……… ……… ………

"I'm sorry." - Marinette eating her chocolate chip ice cream

"It's not your fault Mari, besides, we can officially say we have a pen pal in Paris." - Garfield with his chocolate mint ice cream trying to lighten the mood, managed to get a chuckle out of Marinette.

"We can still video call, or text you. And your parents said you can visit on summer and winter break." - Rachel just starting her strawberry ice cream

"But what if I need a friend to talk to when I can't sleep? Or if I need a movie buddy? Or gaming buddy?" - Marinette

"There are online multiplayer games we can play you know." - Rachel

"Yeah, and I'm sure you'll make friends over there really quickly, I mean you already know a few other languages, including French, so there isn't any communication problems." - Garfield

"I wish you guys could come with me..." - Marinette almost done with her ice cream

"... Didn't you say you always wanted a hamster, maybe one that's unique, like a the rare Green Gotham Hamster?" - Garfield with a mischievous grin

"Selina's family friends own a bakery, so no pets allowed. Sorry Rare Green Gotham Hamster, I'm afraid you're staying native to Gotham." - Marinette said patting his shoulder.

"Wait they own a bakery?! As in you can be on a sugar high 24/7?! Take me with you!!" - Garfield

……… ……… ………

Soon it was time for them to go home, when Marinette got home, she continued packing what she would need, making sure that her Siren plushies where safely secure, and then went to eat dinner.

The next day she made sure to get up early, Garfield and Rachel knew where she lived, and wanted to make sure everything was ready for them, setting up the games they would play into the night, and the movies they would watch after that.

She then went to the Gardens to greet her Mom and the plants, doing the usual routine of checking all the plants, complimenting and watering them. During which a sleepy Harley walked over giving Ivy and Marinette a morning kiss before going to make her coffee.

At breakfast she didn't see her Aunt yet, she assumed she was robbing someone rich again.

……… Over to Catwoman ………

"Come ta mama." - Catwoman mumbled as she used her claws to cut the glass surrounding an old elegant purple sapphire that belonged to one of Gotham's founding fathers' wives.

……… Back to Marinette ………

About an hour after breakfast Garfield and Rachel came over, holding Marinettes' rapped presents, they started the day off with trivia games, which they called the MIQ (which can mean either Marinette Isley-Quinzel or in this case Memory Intelligence Quiz) which Marinette and Rachel came to a tie followed by Ivy, then Harley, and Garfield. They then moved on to board games, Marinette decided to play The Game of Life rather than Monopoly (because lets be honest, who has ever finished that game in the time of a signle day? An extreme speedrunner... maybe.) while the adults got the cake ready. Surprisingly Garfield won, he got the acting career, a sports car, a nice old fashioned mid modern house, a wife, and 3 kids... Marinette got the fashion designer career, got a motorcycle, and a small, but nice victorian house, a husband, and one kid... and Rachel got the scientist career (because science is just simplified mortal magic), a delorean car (and even said "Since science is magic I can make it fly, so technically, I don't need roads where I'm going."), a modern cabin in the woods, single (she didn't want a significant other to interrupt her magic science) and got a pet bird.

Once Selina and Ed came over, they began the party, playing games like DDR, Ultimate Mecha Strike 2, and Racing games.

When it came time for Marinette to blow out her candles, she wished that everything would be okay, and that she will be able to come back to Gotham permanently, and blew them out.

She then got to open her presents, she started with Harley's, and got a custom baseball bat that was a dark steel blue, with a light grey handle grip, and it had the words "Quinn For Da Win" on it, putting a smile on her face, when she opened Ivy's gift she got seeds of her favorite flowers to plant over in Paris. She then opened her Uncle Ed's gift, which was a small watch that had special A.I., it had a cover over the inside screen that would flip open to reveal another screen. The cover was silver with a blue question mark, and when it opened, it showed the time, and the location you where in, it could also act as a GPS, and a phone (it could even play music AND had an incredible battery life span). She then moved on to her Aunt Selina's gift, finding a small purple sapphire in the shape of a cat paw, surrounded in silver. She then opened Rachel's gift, it was a travel mug that said "Coffee lives in my veins." (Marinette started drinking coffee recently) which made Marinette laugh, and then she got to Garfield's gift. When she opened it, she found a handmade charm bracelet, it had animals that she really liked around it, and there was one that was a small tiger, with it's eyes and nose having a light green peridot stone, to represent the first day they met. She put the bracelet on her right rist and thanked Garfield for it, and gave everyone a big hug.

She spent the rest of the day playing with her friends, having a wonderful time, and getting a massive sugar rush from all the cake they had. When it came time for dinner they were running low on energy, but were back to normal after Harley snuck some coffee into their food... The only thoughts that went through Garfield and Rachel's minds where "That's why Mari drinks this stuff..."

After dinner they played all kinds of video games, and ended it by watching Back To The Future. They fell asleep some time after 2am.

……… ……… …….

The next morning they all had breakfast and then spent the day playing parkour tag over roofs and playing I spy games. And at the end of the day Marinette gave her friends a big hug, before heading back home. She spent her time with her moms, Uncle, and Frank, playing more boardgames and discussing what she should do to make friends...

"Just be yawhself, we love yuh fawh who yuh are, and I'm sure everyone in Paris will love yuh too... if dey doan, den dey most likely have a massive defective reject of a brain." - Was Harley's opinion

"Riddle the f-ck out of their brain, if they can solve all of them, and like you for you, then they are worthy." - Which was Ed's opinion

"Use a chemical based compound from the magnolia flower, combined with three tulip petals, one rose petal, and pollen from a lilac to create a befriending potion." - Ivy's words made everyone silent before Ed spoke up

"... Harley if you're being mind controlled blink." - Ed deadpaned, which had Marinette cackling

"I'm not bein' mind controlled, also yuh nawhmally say ‘blink once or twice’ not just ‘blink’ I could blink at any random interval and yuh woun't know what tuh tink, and here I thoughtcha were a genius." - Harley with her head on Ivy's lap as Marinette starts wheezing.

"I think y'all broke her." - Frank just pointed to Marinette as she was still cackling and wheezing while in the fetal position.

That's when Selina walked in...

"What the hell did you guys do to Kitten?!" - Selina dropping the bags she got from some high end shop, and after they made sure Marinette was still alive they continued their game... and Marinette may have actually written the list of ingredients for that position, but only as a last resort. When it was time for them to sleep Marinette spent the night with her moms, like she use to when she was 4.

She got up early to make sure everything was ready, she had her sketch book in her backpack, as well as some pencils, ear buds, snacks and a picture of her with her family and friends. She decided to wear her new watch and charm bracelet as she finished checking her bag, she then went into the garden to say goodbye to all the plants, and to give Bud, Lou and Frank one last goodbye. She had about 3 hours before her and her Aunt were to head to the airport, and she spent that time with her moms, almost never leaving their side.

……… ……… …….

As the plane took off she looked out the airplane window, saying goodbye to Gotham, until her next visit home....

•—–·★·–—•

Chapter 3 complete, also just in case I didn't describe her B-day gifts good enough, here's what they look like (꒪꒳꒪)

Hope you're all having an amazing day, staying safe and rockin' all positive vibes,!BUG-OUT! 💮🐞💮

〜(꒪꒳꒪)〜Tag List〜(꒪꒳꒪)〜

1st Place★: @jumpingjoy82

2nd Place★: @myazael

3rd Place★: @solangelo252

@fandom-trapped-03, @zorua-adorable, @blueblossombliss, @thefangirlwholiterallydies, @woe-is-me0, @lady-bee-fechin, @jayjayspixiepop, @kashlyn, @toodaloo-kangaroo, @buginetye, @our-preciousss , @vroomtaka, @alessialeone6997

[billylenzstolemyphone]

some lego batman headcanons!! <3

- bruce, after adopting dick (haha), is now super cautious when taking him to school, on patrol, etc. alfred thinks its really sweet and always has to reassure bruce, on dicks first day of school every year, that his sons gonna be okay <3

- sometimes when bruce has to go on patrol and can’t hang out with dick, drive them to school, etc. and alfreds gone, he’ll call jack and ask him if they can go over and take care of dick :D (jack rly does like hanging out with dick even if they say they dont)

- alfred makes two lunchboxes for bruce and dick when they go on patrol because he didnt ONE TIME and they came back starving and exhausted shdslk he fed them and gave them a lecture :)

-  sometimes, with bruces permission, jack and harley will take dick out to go shopping, get ice cream, just some real bestie shit- or they’ll come over and bake or play video games together. (bruce secretly loves it)

- jack is actually a rly good cook/baker and will make everyone breakfast in the morning after he’s stayed the night (bonus: bruce and jack got into a flour fight while making pancakes and alfred walked into the kitchen to see them on the floor losing it)

- dick has a sneaking suspicion that padre and jack arent just “friends”

- bruce and jack, flustered and stumbling over their words, quickly shut this “ridiculous insinuation” down. dick didn’t buy it but okay!

- jacks hair has gotten longer and bruce loves it so he constantly tries to come up with an excuse to braid it or run his fingers through it, but hes really bad at covering the real reason up bc hes stuttering n shit so jack will just smile at him and sit with his back against bruces chest and say “go to town, ya sap”

- jack calls alfred “jeeves” and he says it so seriously and naturally that everyone whos in the room loses it whenever he does DSKSB alfred tries to ignore it gsjgka

IM GONNA GET INTO MORE LIKE SEXUALITY/IDENTITY ONES NOW-

- gay alfred rights. no- no. you heard what i said. he never really told anyone but one day while talking to bruce in the batcave it just kind of slipped out and bruce was like “oh fr?? shittt thats cool alfred <3” SKDLSBSLF (he/him, cis, gay)

- since dick is pretty young he doesnt completely understand the concept of sexuality and identity just yet, but they fully support any and all!! theyve also come across the term non-binary and feels like its perfect for how he feels! (he/him/they/them, non-binary, not quite sure yet they just like people :D)

- bruce also is still trying to understand and learn more about all of the lgbtq+ terms/sexualities/identities, he wants to make sure that he is always respectful! he has however, come to the conclusion that he likes men and women >:) (he/him, cis, bisexual)

- jack got very excited when dick came to him for advice on these things because they love introducing and educating people on the community! he was also ecstatic when dick came out to them as non-binary and told him that their pronouns were he/they!! because now they were pronoun buddies!! jack is also ftm trans :D (he/him/they/them, trans, gay)

- i felt like i should do barbara because...idk i just want to sdshk- barbara, honestly just in this movie to me, is a straight ally (i think that apart from this movie that shes a lesbian!) who will attend pride events and pass out candy, give hugs, etc. she loves the community and like bruce, always tries her best to be respectful and correct when using her terms!! yayay! (she/her, cis, straight ally)

- harley!!! harley is a loud and proud bisexual woman and she is dating poison ivy >:)) who, i headcanon, is a lesbian YUUUP- harley was there for jack when they needed her and she was the one who taught jack about all of the terms and stuff :)) the three of them (harley, ivy, and jack) will go to pride parades/events together and sometimes jack will persuade bruce to go with them <3 (harley: she/her, cis, bisexual. ivy: she/her, cis, lesbian also off topic but ivy is black and has long red braids fucking fight me)

- ill do selina too!! selina is a butch lesbian that has her very rare moments of being feminine sjjsk i love her- she likes to go to clubs and make sure to beat up anyone whos getting a little too touchy feely towards other people or beat up anyone whos just being an asshole >:) as she should! she honestly doesnt care much about pronouns just dont use he/him and ur good (she/her/they/them/etc., cis, lesbian)

AAAAHDHDSLBK THATS SO MUCH OMG- BUT YEAH I LOVE THE LEGO BATMAN MOVIE ITS FUCKING AMAZING ITS MY COMFORT MOVIE AND I LOVE MAKING HEADCANONS AND TALKING ABT THEM HSKDBSLD- feel free to talk abt ur headcanons!! re-blog this or just comment <33 ilyyy

[luminescentauthor]

Disclaimer that i haven't read/watched much about the Birds of Prey BUT, a proposition:

Black Canary manhandles Red Hood into counseling sessions because she's tired of seeing Oracle worry herself in circles about Jason and Bruce, and it somehow devolves into her training him in hand-to-hand and anger management because "you would be a much better fighter if you could just keep a cool head and this is a CRIMINAL waste of talent what EVEN"

And before Dinah or Jason realize it's happening, the Birds of Prey/Sirens have adopted him. Babs is thrilled. Jason has no idea how this happened.

Snippets of interactions below!

Dinah, exasperated: Rage all you want, rage is fine, so long as you know how to keep your head cool and level while your emotions are blazing!

Jason, slumped on the couch with his arms crossed like a sulky teenager: *Grumbles unintelligibly*

Dinah, more exasperated: Kid.

Barbara, off to the side: He knows you're right he just doesn't want to admit it

Batman, about Poison Ivy: She's destroying millions in property!!

Jason: Those factories were illegally dumping waste. They are going to destroy the planet. She attacked at night when there were no bystanders. Who gives a shit, Bruce.

Batman, visibly struggling: But-

Barbara: Aren't you supposed to be on the side of JUSTICE instead of by default on the side of the law????

Batman: Your father is mad at me!!

Barbara: Yeah that sounds like a you problem?

Jason: *Trying and failing to not laugh*

Harley: WAIT YOU'RE THE ONE JOKER KILLED

Jason: *Starts nervously backing up*

Harley: I was SO angry with him about that GOD -- do ya wanna break into Arkham and beat ‘im up?

Jason:

Jason: Hell yeah I do

Barbara, in the background: No!

Bruce: That's my kid!!

Selina: Nope mine now I call custody rights

Bruce: Selina you can’t just steal my kid!

Selina, clearly suppressing a grin: Of course I can, stealing other people’s stuff is literally my entire thing!

Bruce: *Exasperated spluttering*

Joker: *Breaks out*

Harley, Jason, and Barbara, AKA three of the people who have suffered the most at his hands:

Bruce: ...I don't know if I should be worried about what Joker is going to do or what's going to be done to him

(Joker is tossed back in Arkham within 48 hours. He has a lot of broken bones but is in no danger of dying, at least? Jason and Barbara are a very chaotic duo and Harley makes them even worse. Bruce just sends Barbara a text saying "thank you for leaving him more or less in one piece")

(“You aren't mad???" "No??? They got him back in Arkham before he hurt anyone and that's kind of the important part." "...Selina yelled that at you." "...yes.” “...You’re an idiot.” “Thanks, Tim. Thanks.”)

[soulmate-game]

Can you do a prompt of Marinette being the daughter of the Joker and Harley but Harley left him before Marinette was born and when Joker found out about his daughter He decided to kidnap Marinette so she can become like him (Ace chemicals) (Daminette)

Woot, my first ask in a while! Let’s see how I can do this oddly specific ask that reminds me of a fic that might actually exist but tbh I’ve read so many fanfics idk if my brain is remembering right

—*—*—*—*—*

Marinette knew Sabine and Tom weren’t her biological parents. She had known ever since she was eight, when her mother by blood visited her for the first time, sat her down, and explained everything. Including, but not limited to, her disastrously toxic past relationship, her new girlfriend, and her recent success with long term rehab (unofficial rehab that mostly consisted of illegal anti-hero actions, but hey if it worked it worked).

Marinette understood. Well no, she really didn’t since she was only eight, but she understood that her mom— that Harley— was genuine. She had always had a knack for emotions and telling when people were sincere or not. And Harley really was regretful about not being in her life beforehand, and was serious about wanting to be part of her life now that her own was mostly sorted out.

So Marinette was not surprised when Harley really did stick it out. When Harley cooed over Marinette copying her hairstyle to show her support of her biological mom, when Harley never failed to call at least once a week even if she was in jail for punching some asshole or another. Harley never stayed arrested long anymore, she was usually found to be on the right side of the moral scale more and more often so the police didn’t bother keeping her locked up anymore. Through the years, Marinette always looked forward to her mom’s calls. Looked forward to being lulled to sleep by one crazy story or another from her mother’s past. Everything was nice. Perfect, even, for a while.

A thump sounded from her balcony, one late night when Marinette was thirteen. Blinking, the dark haired girl furrowed her brows. Who would be on her balcony? Cautiously walking towards the trap door leading to it, grasping her metal pencil holder as a weapon (she remembered all of her Mom’s stories about break-ins and random attacks back in Gotham), the teen strained her ears. Akuma attacks were only a few months old now, but she had already become in high alert for any sign of Hawkmoth or his victims. As per usual, Marinette’s paranoia began to kick in. Did Hawkmoth already figure her out? Was he here for her earrings? Would she be able to fight him?

She gently pushed up the trap door, catching a glimpse of black leather. Huh? Marinette narrowed her eyes, confused. Was it Chat? He should have been on patrol, on the other side of the city. What was he doing visiting her?

Suddenly the trap door yanked the rest of the way open, making Marinette yelp as the handle for it rugged away from her fingers. And there, backlit by the pure blue-white moonlight, was Not Chat Noir. It was Catwoman, in all her skintight black leather glory, grinning at her before pushing her cat-eye goggles up to the top of her head and crouching down by the trap door’s entrance, balancing only on the pads of her feet.

“Well hello there~” the woman purred. “So you’re the cute little kitten Harley is so secretive about. Nice to finally meet you,” the woman held out a hand, sending Marinette a sweet, if mysterious, smile. For a while, the pigtailed girl only stared before a squeal of excitement left her throat, leaving very little room for any doubt as to her bloodline. A large smile curled over Marinette’s lips, leaving her beaming widely at the catlike woman on her balcony.

“Auntie Selina! Mom’s told me so much about you! Come in, come in, come in! I’ll sneak some macaroons up for you. Or do you prefer croissants? What’s your favorite flavor? Are you really dating Batman? Oh my goodness, that necklace is so lovely! Did you steal it?”

Selina could only chuckle fondly at the word vomit, letting the smaller girl drag her down the trap door and into her very… pink room. Looking around, Selina was once again slapped with just how similar this kid was to her outgoing friend. Marinette clearly had no shame in indulging in the things she liked, such as the color pink and anything regarding fashion. But there were other things amongst the girliness of the room, like the posters of Jagged Stone and the training dummy half-sticking out of her closet door. There were a few ornamental knives hung up behind her computer, seemingly just for decoration although Selina could see that they were definitely battle ready and sharpened. A small mallet, clearly a miniature replica of her mother’s own signature weapon, leaned up against the side of the girl’s laundry basket. But then there was Marinette’s mannequin, which was surrounded by meticulously cut pieces of cloth and had other pieces pinned to it strategically. Marinette clearly had the same professionalism and love for her chosen career that had so completely defined Harley in the Time Before Joker. The same genius intellect hiding in those deceptively cheerful bluebell eyes. And for the first time, though not for the last to be sure, Selina found herself thoroughly relieved that it seemed Marinette had inherited very little from her father.

Except, as she would learn from stories Harley told her later, an apparent affinity for chaos.

“I’m not that picky, kitten. But I’m not that hungry, so don’t go too out of your way,” Selina decided to just react the same way she did with Harley’s rambles, and answer one question at a time. “Also, I am actually dating Bruce Wayne. But, if you promise not to tell anyone—“ she waited for Marinette’s eager nod before continuing casually, “— the two are maybe not as mutually exclusive as many think,” Selina finished with a conspiratorial wink. “No, I actually did not steal this necklace. Bruce has been adamant in trying to curb me of my thieving habit by buying me almost everything I so much as glance at sideways. It’s sweet. Naive, because I like stealing for the fun of it, but sweet.”

Marinette giggled, bouncing in place happily. She loved a bit of innocent gossip like this. “Is Momma Ivy ever gonna visit? I don’t think Mom told her much about me yet, and I still gotta give her the shovel talk!” the fierce look that overcame Marinette’s face made Selina laugh again. Oh yes, definitely her mother’s daughter.

“Pam has been trying to sneak over, but the laws regarding Metahumans in Paris suddenly got much stricter a few months back and have caused some problems. You wouldn’t happen to know what happened, would you?” Selina did not miss when her seemingly innocent question caused her niece to close off almost instantly. Bluebell eyes took on a familiar guardedness, and scanned her with the same soul-searching intensity that Harley had when she was channeling her Psychiatrist side. Selina found herself in a slightly concerning spot though—

Because she couldn’t predict Marinette at all. She was left to simply stand there as Marinette searched for some unidentifiable thing in her eyes, completely unable to read the younger girl’s face and with no idea of what to expect. The side effect of having chaos so thoroughly entwined in both of her biological parents, she supposed.

“Nope, no idea.”

Selina knew that was a lie, but knew equally as well that she would not be getting a better answer anytime soon. So, she let it go and the two of them once again dipped into innocent chatter.

Later that night, when Selina left and the sun threatened to rise at any minute, Tikki flew up from her hiding spot under Marinette’s pillow to land on her holder’s shoulder. Marinette giggled and looked over at her little friend.

“Tikki?”

“Yes, Mari?”

“Why was I chosen to be your holder?” She asked suddenly, flopping back into her bed and staring at her ceiling. The little goddess hummed, smiling knowingly before flying down to cuddle in the crook of Marinette’s neck.

“Because you are born from luck itself. Even when bad things happen, you have the luck and determination to get out just fine, and stronger than before. And despite the destruction and anarchy in your blood, you have the willpower to reign it in and keep control of yourself. That’s all order really is, Marinette. The decision to take all the chaos and madness around us, and make it make sense. Make it do something good. And that’s a large part of who you are, I could feel it in your soul the moment we first met.”

Marinette closed her eyes, biting the inside of her cheek. “What if I lose control?”

“... You’ll just have to get it back. It’ll be hard, but as long as you have people to support you, you will be able to do it. You aren’t evil, Marinette,” the small God seemed to sense the true question her holder was asking, and did her best to soothe the doubt the girl felt. “Just remember the reasons you fight against chaos. Remember everyone you love, and you’ll be okay. And you have me, I’ll always help you.”

“... thank you, Tikki.”

—*—*—*—*—*

“He’s going to find out, Mom.”

“No he won’t, don’t be silly! I’ve been very careful about hiding you from him, Nettie-pie.”

“Mom… I just have a bad feeling. I don’t think we can hide who I am from him. If he sees me, I think he’ll know.”

The phone went silent.

“If he hurts you, I’ll kill him. If I was crazy about him, Sugar, then I’m head over heels for you. Not even he can stop me from caving his skull in if he tries his usual tricks with you.”

“... My plane leaves soon, I’ll talk to you when I land. And mom?”

“Yeah, honeycake?”

“I love you.”

—*—*—*—*—*

It was uncanny just how often Marinette’s hunches were right. Her intuition was something to behold, truly, because it only took three days in Gotham before Joker snatched her right out of her room at Harley and Ivy’s apartment. At least Marinette had sixteen by then, so she had had enough experience as a hero in Paris and with generally unpredictable situations and people who were absolutely nuts for her to not immediately panic. Too much, anyway.

Because there was definitely a little panic there.

See, Marinette knew herself inside out by then. After her own battle with her toxic feelings towards Adrien and doing her best to heal from those before she turned out like her mom, she knew she was by no means mentally indestructible. Mental illness ran the high risk of being inherited, and Marinette was well aware that her own personality was scarily similar to her mother’s at times. She got attached quickly, felt affection and love for others very strongly and, as she found with Adrien, could easily become obsessive if she didn’t watch herself. At least Harley was the perfect person to help with that, and Marinette was serious about helping herself too. She did everything she could to keep an eye on her mental health and keep her behavior in check so she didn’t do anything too unhealthy with her relationships again.

But she knew, she knew she had a soft spot for family. She got attached too easily. And being in the same room as her biological father, despite being tied up by her hands and feet and knowing just how many unforgivable things he had done in his life, Marinette felt vulnerable. She didn’t want to hurt him, despite everything. She still loved him, despite every reason not to, despite her first meeting with him being with him shoving chloroform over her face and hogtying her to a metal chain dangling over a vat of acid.

Geez, she’d need more than just her mom as a therapist after this for sure. Even if her mom had a PH.D, Marinette felt like she’d need several psychiatrists to sort through her emotional turmoil right then and make sense of any of it.

Marinette licked her lips, aware that the only kindness that Joker gave his daughter was sparing her from the discomfort of being gagged.

“Don’t,” Marinette said, surprising herself with the amount of steel she was able to put into her voice. Somehow, she managed to make the single word sound more like an order than a plead. “Joker, put me—“

“Ah-Ah-Ah!” The clown walked over, tutting and waving his finger in the air in almost playful admonishment. He gave her a dramatically fake pout. “Don’t you know it’s disrespectful to refer to your father by his first name?” Neither of them mentioned that Joker was definitely not his real name. They both knew the point was moot. “Say it with me now— ‘Daddy dearest, I am more than willing to be dunked in acid for you,’ go ahead, say it.”

Marinette’s jaw clenched. Familial love or not, she would not tolerate being ridiculed like that. She dealt with enough ridicule when she was fourteen and fifteen during school, before she put Liar Rossi in her place. She had spent the past three years as a hero in charge of the war against Hawkmoth, in charge of protecting all of Paris from an emotional terrorist.

And gee, wasn’t that what Joker was, too? Sure, he was a terrorist in the classic meaning of the word as well, but he was nothing if not a skilled manipulator. He knew the human mind just as well as Harley or any other psychiatrist did, he just used his knowledge for different means. He had emotionally abused Harley for years, he emotionally abused and manipulated people all across gotham on a daily basis. He was just another Hawkmoth, but with more physical violence in place of magic.

With these thoughts strengthening her resolve, Marinette narrowed her eyes at the man who donated half of her DNA. She let her anger boil into her irises, hitting him with one of the few traits she knew she inherited from him.

Her ability to intimidate others on the tip of a hat.

“No,” she growled back at him. She took a deep breath. It had taken her a while, but she refused to be ashamed of who she was regardless of her blood relation. She would have no problem using the very things she inherited from Joker against him. She might have gotten most of Harley’s personality, she might have inherited her mother’s habit of falling in love hard, fast, and obsessively, but she also had Joker’s defiance. His bone-deep inability to be stopped from doing exactly whatever the fuck he wanted.

And then, there were Marinette’s own traits. The ones that were completely her own, developed over her life organically. Like her refusal to bow down to bullies, her creativity, her ability to take even the most chaotic situation and see some sort of balance and sanity in it that she could use to her advantage.

That she WOULD use to her advantage. The shadows she saw move out of the corner of her eye gave her the chance to do exactly that, she just needed to buy a few more seconds. Just a few more seconds.

“Excuse me?” Joker growled right back, his own intimidation, honed over more years than Marinette had been alive and thus much more potent than her own, reading its ugly head as he stalked towards her. His face was pulled down into an ugly snarl, his shoulders tensed and back straight as he glared right at her. From his spot on the metal walkway, he was easily able to reach over the railing and grab her chin in one pale, viciously strong hand. “I think you’re misunderstanding something here, little Marionette. I’m your father. Half of your life came directly from ME. That makes you my puppet. You exist to follow my orders,” his right grip suddenly let go, leaving behind the beginnings of a bruise as his entire demeanor changed from angry to cheerful. He spread his arms as if gesturing to the whole chemical plant victoriously, and an unnaturally large smile curved over his lips and bared yellowing teeth at her. “But that’s okay. I’ll forgive you this time, you haven’t learned any better yet. That’s why we’re here. We need to cleanse you of all those icky bad habits you’ve learned up until now, all you need is a little,” he bounced in place with a wicked smirk to illustrate his next words— “jumpstart. A little acid goes a long way to enlightenment you know, you’ll see my side of things in no time. And with my blood in you, you’ll make a better sidekick than that idiot Harley ever did. I can sense it, you’ve got a real talent for Chaos in you, it’s exciting, Heheeeheheee! Now then, we should probably speed things along before our family reunion is cut short. Hang in there, my little Marionette,” the man actually had the gall to spin in place while humming a tune cheerfully before all but dancing over to the lever that held Marinette’s length of chain in the air over the vat of chemicals below her. “Everything will clear up in that little head of yours in just a second!”

There! Right as Joker pulled the switch to lower her into the bubbling vat underneath her, Marinette was able to finish untying her hands. She couldn’t contain a small yelp as gravity flung her body forward, leaving her upside down on the chain for a brief moment. That was when the chain started lowering rapidly, and Marinette was barely able to rip the rope off of her ankles in time to swing off of it and onto the metal walkway that came up right next to the giant metal container of liquid death and insanity. Joker had barely enough time to shout in rage before the windows near the ceiling shattered, admitting the city’s vigilantes themselves. Batman, Nightwing, Red Robin, Red Hood, Robin, and evening Black Bat all landed on the same metal platform above Marinette’s head that Joker was still on, buying the teen time to start running. But she didn’t go towards the exit right away, instead heading right up the stairs into the thick of the fight. Robin briefly separated from where Joker was managing to hold his own, goons flooding from side doors to inhibit the heroes in their attempt to bring their boss down.

The katana-using vigilante kept one eye on Marinette the whole time, suspicious of why the girl would come back up if not to help her father. But that wasn’t what she did, instead she flipped and kicked and punched her way through the quickly growing sea of Joker thugs until she reached a small pink purse that had been abandoned near the lever that had nearly sent her into liquid insanity. Three thugs surrounded her right as she snatched the purse up and slung it over her shoulder, but Robin barely had the chance to head over before she was heaving the men, who were all easily three times her size, over her shoulder and was slamming elbows into soft spots and the side of her hand into pressure points. By the time Robin got to her side, all three men were unconscious and bound to wake up in utter agony.

Marinette glanced up, getting ready to haul Robin over her shoulder as well before she realized who he was. She let her shoulders relax just a tick, sighing in relief before returning her eyes to scanning their surroundings. She shot him a brief grin.

“Good thing my adoptive mother, Mom, Momma Ivy, and Auntie Selina all made sure I knew how to take down a small army on my own, huh?” She asked rhetorically before they were both unceremoniously dragged back into the giant brawl.

—*—*—*—*—*

“Nettie-pie!”

“Marigold!”

Harley and Pamela Quinzel-Isley shoved down anyone and everyone who dared block their direct path to their daughter. The girl of the hour stood next to the bat clan, a shock blanket held tightly around her shoulders as she did her best to finish her statement to both the vigilantes and Commissioner Gordon.

“You untied yourself… from a ship-grade knot in high quality rope… with a phone charm?” They heard Gordon ask incredulously, to which Marinette could only give a lopsided smile. That was when her mom and stepmom crashed into her, enveloping her in a nearly suffocating hug.

“Gah— mom— momma Ivy—“ Marinette flailed in their arms for a bit before finally getting her head free and continuing her statement as if she didn’t have two of the most dangerous women in the city still giving her a bone crushing hug. “That’s better. Yes, Commissioner. You see, I realized when I was in the car with Joker, while I was pretending to still be unconscious, that one of the charms on my phone had pretty sharp corners that I could use like a serrated edge if I had enough time. So I carefully detached it from my phone, and held it in my palm. It took almost an hour, but once Joker noticed I was awake I kept him talking so that he didn’t notice what I was doing even as he tied me up to that chain. Really, it’s just lucky that I was able to get it worn down in time,” Marinette rubbed the back of her neck with a nervous chuckle. “But regardless, I think Batman and his partners,” she nodded to the listening vigilantes just to the side of her. “Were close enough that I would have been caught anyway, I just wanted to make sure they had less work to do. The sooner I freed myself, the sooner ‘Daddy Dearest,’” she grimaced as she mockingly used the same term Joker had tried to get her to say earlier that night. “Could go back behind bars where he belongs.”

“Oh my little Nettie-cake,” Harley cried, finally pulling back from the hug long enough to wipe her cheeks. It was clear that she had been crying for a while, and her colorful pigtails were mussed and tangled from where she must have been tugging on them in worry. “You were right. I’m so sorry, I never should have let you come to Gotham when I knew he was out of Arkham.”

Marinette was quick to shake her head frantically, pulling her arms out of Ivy’s hold so she could grasp Harley’s shoulders firmly. “No. No, Mom, I’m fine! And besides, we knew I couldn’t stay secret forever. I really like staying with you and Momma Ivy! Everything turned out fine though, and he’s headed back to Arkham. It’s okay.”

“It’s not okay, Nettle,” Pam argued, distracting herself by running her hands through Marinette’s bangs. She had only known the girl for two years, but that was more than long enough for her to consider the teenager as her own. “He took you right out from under our noses. You were supposed to be safe in our home, and he still got to you. That’s not okay. We weren’t able to protect you like we should have been. Maybe you should go back to Paris early.”

“What?! No way!” Marinette argued, eyes wide. “This is the first time I’ve been able to ever visit you guys in Gotham, I’m not letting some psycho sperm donor keep me from enjoying time with my family! I came here knowing full well that it was dangerous. I’m not gonna just run away after one bad experience.”

Harley snorted, and then devolved into uncontrollable giggles. “Heh— psycho sperm donor. Good one, sugar!”

Marinette smiled and rolled her eyes good naturedly at her mom’s usual immature antics. Seeing as Gordon had walked away muttering to himself a short while ago, Marinette pulled herself the rest of the way away from her moms and turned to the vigilantes. Without a second’s pause, she bowed to them just like her Maman Sabine taught her.

“Thank you for helping save me. I know it’s probably a shock that I’ve been kept secret from you guys all this time, but I hope you don’t lump me in with the likes of the green-haired half of my DNA. I’m staying with my Moms in their apartment, if you guys decide to patrol by our place like I suspect, I’ll leave some baked goods and coffee out for you on our patio. It’s the least I can do for you all after tonight. And don’t be too hard on Auntie Selina. Me and Mom swore her to secrecy, even from you guys.”

Batman jerked a little at the mention of Catwoman’s real name, jaw twitching for a second. Behind his cowl, his eyes narrowed. Marinette laughed, easily reading his body language and expression.

“She never told me who you are, but she didn’t exactly hide it either. It was easy to put the last pieces together on my own. But don’t worry, SHE swore me to secrecy too. I won’t tell anyone.

“How the hell are you related to the Laughing Asswipe from Hell?” Red Hood blurted out, his confusion clear even from behind his hideous helmet. Marinette burst into giggles, and both Pamela and Harley smiled knowingly.

“Mom gave me up for adoption when I was born, so I spent my whole life in Paris up until now,” she admitted. “Mom didn’t visit me for the first time until I was eight, and she and my adoptive parents are so awesome that it must’ve suffocated the worst traits from his DNA before they had a chance to develop,” she guessed out loud with a good natured smile.

Batman grunted. Marinette knew that one run-in wasn’t enough for them to trust her. After all, she was still the biological daughter of their arch enemy. But she didn’t mind, she understood the caution even if she didn’t fully agree with it. They weren’t outright hostile, despite the fact that Robin had never stopped glaring at her since they fought back-to-back against the mob of thugs earlier. She could live with their suspicion, as long as they continued to not be outright rude or mean to her.

At least she could empathize with Adrien now, whenever she figured out how to break it to him that Hawkmoth was definitely Gabriel and couldn’t be anyone else. Hopefully she could help soften the blow for him a little.

Harley and Ivy were starting to herd Marinette towards their car and take her back home, where they could continue to smother her in care and make sure she didn’t have even a scratch on her, when Robin’s voice stopped them all in their tracks.

“You are a surprisingly capable combatant.”

Marinette froze, blinking in surprise for a second before turning to stare at Robin in shock. The rest of the Bat Clam was doing the same, nobody expecting Robin of all people to be the first to directly complement Marinette. He tutted, crossing his arms, but never moved his gaze away from Marinette’s eyes.

“But your form could use some work. Most of your style is incredibly improvised, which I can appreciate since you do it well, but you would benefit from more structure in your fighting. I will set up a time and place for us to spar. We start in two days, if you think you can handle it.”

It took a while for what Robin said to sink in, and another few seconds for Marinette to decipher what his semi-aggressive, order-phrased proposal really meant. And she smiled.

“It’s a date.”

—*—*—*—*—*

Woo! This started off a little rough, but I really like how it ended up! Thank you, Anon!

[perperam]

OKAY I saw your Instagram post things and I just want to know what are your headcanons for that universe?? Is there any specific AU you imagine the Instagram AUs happening in or do you have specific rules for your own ideal version or

somehow, surprisingly, you're not the only one to ask this !!

okay so funny story at first I literally just drew the instagram things bc I thought yeah harley would be so loved by all of internet generation gen z college kids (as an internet gen z recently graduated undergrad myself)

but then as I made the posts more and more intricate with the comments and stuff it kinda...grew into something bigger? like they actually have a particular AU for them now!! so that's fun

here's what I'm thinkin I want in my social media AU:

world building wise:

neither of them are really "heroes" but they aren't outright supervillains either—like they're anti-heroes that dont give a shit about corporate & capitalist culture

aka they can, have, and will continue to steal from big market names and threaten CEOs, but will also pool money to pay small business and support local folks

much like the vibes of the harley quinn animated series, harley and the rest are literally Just People and go to coffee shops and just hang out in public (the fuck is GCPD gonna do for them drinking coffee, send em to Arkham??)

this makes them really well liked by Gotham's general public

also because ivy has and will kill rapists and bad men on sight and harley has on more than one occasion been linked to crimes where abusers have mysteriously turned up dead or beat to a pulp with a blunt object suspiciously shaped like a bat or sledgehammer

there's this specific tattoo shop harley really likes that she goes to whenever she wants a new piece done, and because of her instagram they've become the most popular place in Gotham, in fact if you go there on any given day you have a 25% chance of seeing harley

also I wasn't kidding when I said harley really would have her own psychiatry clinic and continue to treat people (mostly college kids and criminals) for free because harley says fuck the US health care system and helping others would be really fulfilling to her

harley advertising on her instagram story: hey yall I'll be having a trauma processing session tonight at my clinic please stop by if you want to make an appointment or listen to my lecture

oh also harley has a podcast and the episodes vary from "workout routine" to "breaking the glass ceiling of female supervillains and the male gaze in crime" to "why stealing is sometimes okay" to "studying for the mcat and quick tips" to "perhaps marx was right" to random tangents that go on and on and on

pam on the other hand is not only a feared ex-supervillain but now a revered member of Gotham's city-revitalization planning committee

in between heists for rare floral specimen she plans climate protests and tree-planting events and in general does her damn best to try and bring some sort of green to Gotham in a "legal fashion" (a news source once said this and ivy almost killed the news anchor on the fucking spot from how much rage pumped through her veins in that moment)

characters & dynamics wise:

harley and ivy have been living together and literally married for like, a year now by this point

selina is over so often she might as well be living at their apartment

the gotham city sirens and the batkids are besties!! as they should be (this used to stress bruce out to no end but after the third family dinner dick planned with "aunty harls and pam" he had to eventually give up)

in fact jason and harley often get involved in stupid shenanigans and dick is almost always there with them and literal seconds from being implicated in their scheme somehow

jason is often at harley and ivy’s apartment and can greatly relate to harley in many different ways (from growing up in a crime riddled neighborhood to having intense trauma courtesy of the joker and ivy finds it endearing that he trusts harley enough to let people in (and there is a visible, tangible change in him after he starts getting closer to harley, everyone can feel how much happier he becomes)

harley and ivy are 28 and 32 respectively but because ivy literally has the interests and name of a 90 year old everyone just teases her by calling her "grandma pamela"

the batkids refer to them as aunty harley and aunty (sometimes grandma) ivy and ivy fights every time for a different name but just gave up sometime after tim joined in

ivy and tim get along really well, surprisingly

also alfred literally loves pam because she helps the plants in bruce's neglected green house thrive and ivy really enjoys his company because he's on the same wave length as her and "knows when to shut the fuck up and just bask in the quiet unlike literally all other men"

I think I want babs and dinah to be dating bc have you seen their chemistry and dick and kori to be dating bc again have you seen their chemistry but I'm kinda torn and in between and idk

bud and lou are great cuddle bugs and ivy secretly loves it but pretends she hates it to harley's face bc a girl's gotta save some semblance of dignity right

details:

harley has adhd and you can't convince me, someone with adhd, otherwise

harley has both shitty tattoos that she gets for no other reason other than that it's funny or that she hyperfixates on them super hard for half a second and suddenly there's art on her again and ivy's just ?? when she gets home. she also really meaningful tattoos that she has multiple consultations about

she had two ribcage tattoos before the joker, got three tattoos commemorating him during their (highly abusive) relationship which she immediately covered with new ink upon leaving him, and gets a lot of patchwork style tattoos down her arms and thighs

she has a giant flower tattoo going down her entire spine and it's ivy's favorite thing ever

ivy actually also has a (singular) tattoo and it's a diamond with a stem and leaves as if it were a flower

it's still very much a work in progress but since multiple people have asked me about this I thought I'll dump all my thoughts here

[dessarious]

How the Sirens Adopted a Ladybug Pt2

AO3     Beginning   Next

“Absolutely not!” Selina walked back into the room to find Ladybug glaring at Plagg while the creature pouted at her. Harley looked like she was struggling not to laugh but Ivy seemed to be bracing for an explosion. “I’m not about to let you lose in the city Plagg. The last time you ‘helped’ me you collapsed the catacombs!”

“Oh come on Pigtails, you know that was an accident and Tikki fixed it. Besides I’m not going to use my powers. I just want to go with her so I can make sure she gets the right food since you won’t even tell them you’re allergic to shellfish which is in almost everything they ordered.” Ladybug’s face went bright red even though she still looked ready to murder the Kwami. Harley looked devastated.

“Oh kiddo, you should’ve said something. I’m so used to ordering for the three of us I didn’t even think to ask. I’ll call them back, just tell me what you want.” The hero’s expression turned sheepish.

“I’m sure I can find something to eat in what you ordered. I don’t want to be a bother.” Her mumbled words just brought a huff from Plagg.

“Pull up the menu on your phone and I’ll tell you what she’ll eat.”

“Plagg-”

“If you get sick and Tikki knows I could have prevented it I won’t hear the end of it for centuries. I’m getting you food you can eat without breaking out in hives.” As the Kwami and Harley retreated to a corner the girl still looked embarrassed, but she seemed far less agitated.

“You really should have told us. The last thing our reputations need is us being accused of intentionally killing a hero in Paris.” Selina meant it as a joke but considering the horrified expression on the girls face it missed the mark.

“I’m sorry. If it’s any consolation the allergy wouldn’t actually affect me transformed so even if they could link my civilian identity to you I doubt anyone would make a fuss over it.” She wasn’t sure what pissed her off more; the matter of fact way the girl said it or the fact that she felt that way in the first place.

“It’s not, and you don’t need to apologize. I can see where trusting us with that information could be considered dangerous.”  Ladybug gave a non committal hum and continued to watch Plagg warily. When the Kwami flew back over it looked both smug and mischievous.

“Alright now let’s go get some cheese.” Ladybug was rubbing her temples with a pained look on her face. Finally she gave out a resigned sigh.

“Fine.” The Kwami perked up and the hero pinned him with a stern look. “You talk only if Catwoman is the only one that can hear you and under no circumstances will you use your powers. I mean it Plagg.” The creature was just nodding along.

“Of course. I’m not going to risk my cheese over a little bit of fun.” Given the girl's face, she was less than reassured. “If you’re that worried about it just make it an order.”

“You know I don’t like doing that. Taking away your freewill is not the way I want to do things. I’d rather you respect me enough to do as I ask.” Plagg’s ears dropped for a moment before they looked thoughtful.

“Oh, you’re good. Guilt tripping me into good behavior. Tikki would be so proud.” Ladybug rolled her eyes.

“I was being sincere, but if it works I guess I’ll take it.” Her tone was dry. It was definitely an interesting dynamic between the two. “Not to mention Catwoman has to agree to take you along still.”

“I’d be happy to have the company, and you can call me Selina.” Plagg flew closer to study her before giving a thoughtful hum. They didn’t speak but Ladybug was watching the interaction with trepidation.

“Don’t feel pressured into buying the most expensive cheese in the store. Plagg likes to be dramatic about food. You’re doing us a favor and they’ll eat whatever you buy.” The last part was obviously a warning but the creature just rolled their eyes.

“Don’t worry, I’m used to dealing with strong personalities. We should head out so we can get back before the food gets here.” Ladybug hesitated but did nod and Plagg flew into her collar. “We’ll be back before you know it.” The girl gave her a tense smile but Selina figured it was the best she’d get so she headed out the door.

“She’s a good kid. If you’re planning anything I would suggest rethinking it. As she mentioned I’ve destroyed far larger things than a few people.” The threat just made her smile.

“I don’t doubt it. You can rest easy though. None of us mess with kids, and we all have a soft spot for street kids especially.” The creature let out something that sounded like a growl.

“She’s not a street kid, not really. If not for us and the responsibilities forced on her she’d be in a much better place.” Their frustration was obvious, and Selina had one more thing to think about. “Since we’re already going to the store do you mind picking up food for the others?”

“Other’s?” She wasn’t really paying attention, too busy wondering how being a hero put the girl on the streets. Not to mention getting angrier by the second that someone had allowed it to happen in the first place.

“The other Kwami. As Ladybug says we all have our favorites and the easiest way to get on everyone’s good side is food.” Selina let out a chuckle.

“Sure, may as well load up before she can protest.” She felt Plagg laughing against her collar bone.

AO3      Beginning    Next

Ko-Fi

Tags

@asrainterstellar @scorchdragon88

[jmoriarty-221b]

Ok so, you know how there’s a lot of time travel fix it fics? Like Tony Stark gets sent back in time from Civil War and wakes up in the caves with the Ten Rings all over again and changes things for the better? Or those time travel fics where Draco Malfoy gets sent back in time to when he was eleven and befriends Harry and fights against Voldyshorts?

Ok, I love those ngl but I would like to see more of these time travel fix it fics featuring Tim Drake being the one sent back in time to when he was like idk 10? and trying to prevent Jason from dying as the more immediate course of action but in a more lighthearted way??? Like, I’ve read at least three of these fics but I feel like it’s an underrated niche and there should be more fics about it that aren’t just pure angst, I like angst don’t get me wrong, and these kind of time travel fix it stories do have angst but I’m talking about such a story featuring Tim Drake that isn’t Just angst you know?

And it would be like a magical mishap or something but the point is that Tim gets sent back and is smol once more, but he still retains all his memories and is a grown up in his head, and at this point in time in the past the Gotham Rogues are not so completely evil, like they’re villains but there’s the possibility of them becoming anti-villains so Tiny Tim just decides ‘fuck it, I was a Bat the last time but Selina’s cooler than Bruce so I’m going to ask her for training instead and maybe build my own criminal empire because it can’t be harder than running WE and I’ve already done that’ (there’s a difference between anti-hero and anti-villain but I don’t remember what it is exactly but basically I think of anti-villains having the same vibes as a docile predator? They can and will commit atrocities but it will be for a good reason and they have limits that they set upon themselves so while they’re not in the side of good they are also not actively going against the good side (I think Poison Ivy could qualify here? Harley Quinn could also qualify but I feel that she would be able to transition from anti-villain to anti-hero ya know?) whereas anti-heroes are willing to commit acts that aren’t morally correct in order to deliver justice and are on the side of good but tend to use harsher methods [see Red Hood & Catwoman])

And now Tim, after accomplishing his first mission of making sure the Joker doesn’t unalive Jason, gets to have more ‘creative liberties’ because, while he is ultimately on the side of good, he leans more towards a grey moral spectrum like Selina does and, as previously stated, has managed to start up his own criminal empire in Gotham with Bruce being non the wiser because he’s still just the neighbors’ kid, Tim does befriend Jason at school for shits and giggles and because before the whole time travel incident they did manage to become friends and he wants Jason in his life again, he remembers Damian and is torn between giving Bruce a heads up like ‘ey you have a secret baby with Talia Al Ghul so you might wanna check it out’ or just contacting Talia and convincing her that Damian would be safer with Bruce until she can take care of Ra’s and take over the LoA (hey, Tim never claimed to be a saint and honestly? Talia would do so much better at leading the League, plus Ra’s is getting up there in age where the green kool-aid is getting to him so yeah; this would obviously be based on Talia’s storyline before writers decided to make her drug Bruce in order to have Damian where, for this AU, she was willing to marry Bruce and run from the LoA but Ra’s happened so she couldn’t escape and then found out she was pregnant, she couldn’t tell Bruce because she was being heavily monitored by Ra’s until she finally had a chance ten years down the line and left Damian in his father’s care, and she considers Jason to be like a second son to her and Damian’s brother, so no that icky bit where Jason and Talia *gags* did It never happens here please and thank you)

Just want to read a more lighthearted time travel AU featuring Tim Drake because he is and has always been a gremlin child and I feel like that should be showcased more