#<- trying to use every neg tag I’ve seen to be safe

[fagbearentertainment]

Owl House hot take

Lunter is better and make more thematic sense than Huntlow

Not saying I would’ve wanted Lunter to be end game, I love the found family dynamic they have and I love Lumity, but in my opinion it works way better than Huntlow as a Caleb/Evelyn parallel and makes way more sense for the story. Even purely platonically it just makes so much more sense that Hunter and Willow being implied to get together in the second to last episode of the show

[mcmoth]

Dream SMP fandom etiquette

So. This post is probably too little, too late, considering the fandom and the issues I'm about to talk about have existed for so long now, and a lot of the people who need to hear this probably aren't on tumblr anyways, but I just wanted to dedicate a quick post to talk about fandom etiquette. Mostly pertaining to discourse, and interactions with people outside of our circle. These are just going to be my own personal thoughts, of course, but I felt it could be good to bring some of this to attention. So without further introduction:

Where to (not) talk about discourse:

Don't go into other streamer's vods to only focus about a different character. If you want to analyse, for example, c!Techno, do it in Techno's stream. Don't go into unrelated streams, like Tommy's, Tubbo's etc. to do it, even if they were a part of the event in question. This is, of course, with the exception if the character in question didn't stream their own pov. But otherwise, stay in your own space. This is to prevent cluttering a streamer's comments about unrelated discussion. To give further example: Tubbo's vod comments should primarily focus on Tubbo's character. Not Tommy's, Ranboo's, Techno's or whoever else's.

Don't start discourse in the comments of animatics. Seriously, stop that. Animatics aren't discussion boards. The comments are there to analyse and appreciate the video presented, not argue. It's especially rude if you pick a small detail, that wasn't even the focus of the animatic, or even a completely unrelated issue to rant out your frustrations about. To give examples: starting disc discourse in an animatic of Tommy talking to Wilbur, or rambling about how tragic Techno's character is in an animatic focused on clingy duo, etc.

This applies to fan songs as well.

Video essays are the exception to these rules. I think it's safe to say they're the place to bring your hot takes, if you really feel so inclined to argue in youtube comment sections (Though I'd personally advise to still keep the topic relevant).

Keep negativity out of fanfic comments. This isn't nearly as big of an issue as the last points, but I've seen it happen a couple times, so I'm deciding to mention it. Fanfics are written for fun. Even if you disagree with the characterisation or something else, unless the author is clear in accepting critique, keep criticism to yourself. And definitely don't rant about how you dislike a character unrelated to the fanfic. Sharing your thoughts on the fanfic itself is of course fine and welcomed, but when it turns from discussing the author's story to talking about how you dislike a character in canon, that's when it crosses a line. Example: comment talking about what you don't like about c!Tommy on a Bench Trio fanfiction.

When commenting on art, keep the feedback positive. Even if you dislike any presented character, keep that to yourself. Example: Don't say things like "I hate x character, but this art is good". You might think the author would feel honoured, but it's actually just hurtful.

How to deal with discourse:

This is gonna be a shorter section, because I think we all chose to do it in different ways, and that's valid. Also, it's just that I, myself, am still learning how to do this well, but I thought it could be good to try to lay it out anyways.

Try to scroll past takes you disagree with instead of arguing if you don't think you'd be able to keep your cool. Noone likes a random person yelling at them through a screen, and if you rant, you'll get an equally frustrated reply back, and noone will be happy. Either explain your point in a calm manner, or scroll past/ unfollow/block.

On the keeping cool thing, remember to just step away. Take a deep breath and calm yourself down before proceeding. To minimize the frustration you feel on a daily basis, filter tags, block people, avoid videos and youtube comment sections that you know will upset you, and leave certain internet spaces if you find yourself unable to escape negativity even with all those steps. Remember: in the end, it's all a game played by friends, a story, and your enjoyment of it lies in what you take from it. Abandon what makes you unhappy. Marie Kondo your fandom experience.

Also, here's your reminder, to whom this is relevant, to take care of yourself. Hydrate, eat, sleep, clean up, get fresh air, remember the things outside of all this. There's plenty to do outside of this fandom, and what you can do here can wait. There is no pressure, or obligation. Not for the content you create, not for the discussions you bring, not for responding to discourse, not for anything. Fandom is meant purely for fun, so take care <3

Interacting with people outside of the fandom:

This is something that I've seen a bit of talk about, and I thought I'd drop in my own thoughts on this as well. No matter the differences, we're all just trying to vibe, and I think these are important things to keep in mind to leave both sides better off:

Don't interact with hate posts. Just don't. You don't want to see them, they don't want to see you. Even if your response is lighthearted, their animosity is not. They will feel frustrated regardless, and the grudge will only grow. And if they're being agressive, calm discussion most likely won't happen even if you're being polite. Just leave it, please.

Correct misinformation calmly. I completely get how it can be frustrating to see blatant lies and all, but with our reputation, people will not listen if you're being antagonistic. Provide sources, explain, and leave it at that.

Don't be hateful, send death threats, or assume privilege or whatever else. That's stepping into the same shoes of the people you hate. Misunderstandings go both ways, and the fact of the matter is, I think most people who dislike DSMP, even the ones who are agressive about it, don't have their stance rooted in maliciousness. To expand on why the situation became what it is today, taken from a discussion on discord:

I think it's just a combination of Dream growing so insanely quickly + how internet spaces have changed over the years. When ccs like jackstepticeye or pewdiepie etc. grew popular, activism wasn't as prevalent and held to such importance. Now it's thankfully more talked about, but that also leads to Dream being more scrutinized in comparision. Add twitter trends and the general prevalence of the fandom, and you've got everyone feeling tired and frustrated and paranoid. People also tend not to fact check stuff, especially when it comes to celebrities and stuff they're not really interested in, so rumors spread fast.

And actually, I think there's absolutely valid reasons to be made uncomfortable by Dream SMP, either in it's creators, content or fandom, and there is, of course, stuff to criticise in general. The problem is the hate and misinformation and overexposure, but we are not going to solve any of that by being aggressive in return.

(This is, by the way, not talking about more serious cases. Like doxxing, or leaving gore images in hashtags, or similar instances. That's a whole different complicated issue that I don't feel qualified to tackle.)

And finally, don't overwhelm outsiders who merely mention the Dream SMP. Don't send asks asking them to watch it, don't write paragraphs explaining the lore, don't confuse them with inside jokes, just... Don't jump on people like that. Unless they're explicitly clear in wanting interaction and getting into the fandom, that kind of thing will just drive them away. This is in no way exclusive to the Dream SMP fandom, pretty much every fandom has people enthiastic to have more people involved, but since there are so unbelievably many of us, it's especially easy to go overboard with this stuff. Just... be polite, and don't pressure anyone. Be nice, please.

So.... ya! This would be it for this one, I think. Sorry that it's kinda long, thank you if you read it at all. Hope y'all have pleasant days ^^

[pyrten]

Post about Tumblr etiquette and basic stuff that I'm trying to make as entertaining and colourful as possible because I have the attention span of a stick and if I saw long paragraphs like this too, i would go " I will scroll ".

Part 2: here you go. it’s very short, i think. 

CW! Twitter discourse (indicated, Techno's boundaries being broken. sleepytwt disbanding??, it's short, don't worry).

Hi hi hello to you all coming from Twitter after whatever the fuck happened. Sit down have a drink, take a sip, have a cookie (...cept for chocolate chip, those are mine). It's pretty safe here as long as nobody drags in the cousin we all dislike.

Tags, hashtags, not shopping tags.

We use the tags as a filtering system, basically. Like stuff about:

Tubbo in general? #tubbo .

Stuff about character Tubbo? #c!tubbo / #c!Tubbo .

Stuff about content creator Tubbo? #cc!Tubbo / #cc!tubbo.

etc. etc.

We try to keep positive stuff in the main tags (in general tags), occasionally there will be stuff about Twitter or negativity about them but generally, as far as I've seen, they aren't heavy, or they are but they're pretty solid arguments that aren't like, loud, yelling, or gives off that vibe, I suppose.

#cw!__ / #tw!__ / #neg!__ / #__ crit+ more can be tagged if needed or requested (as in, if the tag isn't already there). Depends on who runs the blog. Whether you need to send in a ask, or just reply to the post, or DM. Up to the person to runs the blog.

-- if there's more I'll add, when I think of them later --

Reblog button my beloved

I'm not : hey I study the algorithm I know shit!

But IG and Twitter runs on likes / retweets. Tumblr runs on reblogs. yeah, yeah, that small button that's like, circular next to the heart.

Looks like recycling, something the government failed to incorporate well. Looks like the recycling symbol doesn't it? yeah it just lacks one arrow and it's not a triangle.

Liking posts? Great that's nice buddy, thank you (not /s)

Reblogging? Mmmmmmm THATS THE SHIT. SEEING THAT IN MY NOTIFS? serotonin. absolutely.

please, it's like the one thing that's keeping this platform afloat and information / works spreading. also it helps spreads the post. Liking doesn't do much, most it does is be a bookmark just so you can look for that post later.

"but I don't want my blog to be flooded with stuff I reblog!" No, no, dude (gender neutral), that's how you get people to follow and find your stuff. You really worried about people being annoyed, can't find what you actually post? Refer to part 1, tags as a filtering system. Make a reference post or whatever, pin it to your profile or make a Carrd, link that stuff. If people are really that lazy to go to the hashtag, doom scrolling works for them.

Filtering, yes great mechanic.

Filtering, now, this isn't for other people to find your stuff and save them time of scrolling. It's somewhat related to the tagging system of Tumblr but it's for yourself this time, very cool.

- Gear icon. Top right corner of your profile.

- Account settings.

- Filtering.

Two options : tag filter and content filter.

Tags filter is self-explanatory. You enter the tag you don't wanna see, and done. You'll never see that tag, or any posts that have that tag again.

Content filter filters posts with certain text content. Certain- as in the text you've entered, and decided you never wanna see em.

Congratulations, your eyes didn't lose HP today.

Bruh when was this posted.

Haven't used Tumblr on a laptop for a while, but I'm pretty sure it says, uh somewhere.

But on phone:

Three dots. Top right of the post.

There it is, like, rightttt there, above that rectangle pop up thing, there's the date. Have fun seeing how dead some blogs are.

My post is getting drowned :(

Uh, reblog your own post or pin it to your own profile. That works.

So does the post drowning and disappearing into oblivion. Tapping a button requires a lot of work and if ya don't want to, shruggie.

Ayo, if you're gonna justify something about someone or any situation, be specific and as clear as you possibly could, if you mess up a little with your argument, that's fine. Edit button is a pencil on the post, you can make another post or reblog the OG post to clarify.

Use tone indicators. There are neurodivergent people on this platform, like, every platform basically. Save us some worrying and head scratching.

Use the tone indicators, and don't use them as a joke (unless it's between like close moots, and your uh following gets it then yeah I suppose that's fine, but clarify in the tags would be great).

Typing out /insert_acronym_here isn't a time consuming thing. ( A simple Google search of Reddit tone indicators can give you a list if you need it ).

Last thing I can really think of is: the hashtags is where all the short hot takes, that good shit, is.

Not just in general, in posts too ;) .

also why are people on Twitter spreading the #kick____ with saying that you shouldn't do that. Your intentions are great m8, but uh, ಠ◡ಠ that's a... It's a method.

k welcome to tumblr. Each app has their like etiquette, this is Tumblr's or the most I can think of. no you can't have my chocolate chip cookies, have a good stay.

I'm going to bed like man, I'm sleepy. (Also since people is coming in because of like, the stuff related to SBI going on twitter, gonna mainly tag that. Hope that's chill)

Also, it's Ramadan. claps, Ramadan Mubarak, have a good one y'all. (whispers hey, hey send some love to fellow Muslims, hope you're doing well.)

Edit:

15/4/2021 , 6.42 PM --- Filtering (new section)

[galactic-magick]

As Long As I’m With You: Agnes/Agatha Harkness x Reader

Request: Hi, can you please do where Agnes (a villain) saves fem reader's life because she has feelings for her? In the end they end up together // also took some ideas from this request

Summary: You’re accused of witchcraft in your village, and a mysterious beautiful witch comes to your aid.

Words: 2200+

Warnings: fem reader, Agatha is low key evil so she hurts some people, a swear word, reader has an angsty past

Author’s Notes: This can be read as either a standalone fic or as a prequel to my other fic “Spell Practice.” I took quite a lot of creative liberty with this, hopefully that’s alright. Also disclaimer I am in no way a history expert so even though this is set in like the 1500s-1600s it’s probably very inaccurate, but it’s fanfic so anything goes right?

Taglist: @nyx-aira​ @midnight-lestrange​ @thestrangeundoing​ @thegayances @sleep-deprived-athlete @dr-robotnik-said-hella​ @fallingfor-fics @p-nymph​ @thelanawinterrs @sunproud​ (if your tag didn’t work it might be bc your blog isn’t searchable so make sure that’s on so you’re notified of future fics!)

-

-

-

You had no idea how much your life would change when you left your house that day.

It started out with a simple run to the market and the garden to get what you needed for supper that night, a job that almost always falls to you. You don’t necessarily mind getting away from your family and talking to some people in town, but it’s clear that your family doesn’t want you in the house as much as possible either.

It’s gotten to the point where they’re just looking for a reason to get rid of you. You’re a disappointment, after all. You refuse to marry in order to help your family’s status, even though you’ve gotten a couple offers. You counter your parent’s rules and ideas every chance you get, no matter how much they tell you you’re crazy. They belittle you constantly, saying your dreams are worth nothing and you’ll have to be dependent on them forever if you never submit to the role in society you’re supposed to.

Obviously bullying you out of their lives wasn’t working, so they’ve moved on to spreading rumors about you and setting you up for crimes. None have worked yet, of course, but every day you fear they’ll get too close.

Until you get burned at the stake, though, they’ve given you basically every responsibility of the house. You do all the shopping, cooking, and farming, as well as taking care of your younger siblings. You wonder what they’d do without you, despite how much they seem to want you gone.

As you’re buying a few crops and eggs from your neighbors, you swear you see something move. You turn around and see a little boy floating in the air, screaming.

You drop everything in your arms and reach up to him, trying to grab him and help him down, but he keeps flailing, and his screams start to feel directed at you.

“Hey! It’s okay! Let me help you!” you hold your hand up, speaking as calmly as you can. “I’m not going to hurt you,”

“WITCH!” a man yells as he sees you. “SHE’S A WITCH!”

Everyone around turns and watches you.

“No! No! I’m not the one doing this! I’m trying to help!”

“Let him down and maybe we’ll wait to kill you til tomorrow!” someone else demands.

A couple people march towards you to grab you, and all you can think to do is start running.

You race out of the center of town into the trees, and about five men chase after you. You keep going until it feels like your legs are going to give out and you can barely breathe, but they keep coming.

“Please! Please stop! It wasn’t me I swear!” you cry. “I don’t know what was happening!”

“Shut up, girl,” one grunts. “Your father always said there was something wrong with you, makes sense that you’re a witch!”

“What’s so wrong about witches?” a female voice calls.

You and the men spin around, trying to figure out where it came from.

Before you can blink there’s purple smoke surrounding you, and the men are thrown against the trees. They’re knocked unconscious instantly, but you remain standing and untouched.

“Who are you?” you ask, your voice quivering.

“Don’t be afraid, my dear,” the smoke starts to fade and you can make out her silhouette, then eventually her face. “I’m here to help you,”

She’s beautiful. You’ve never seen someone that immediately feels so friendly, so different in all the best ways.

“It’s alright to stare, I know I’m quite a sight,” she laughs. “I’m Agatha,”

“I’m Y/N,”

“Ah, yes, I’m pretty sure I’ve heard of you,” she smiles. “Everyone in the village can barely stand you,”

“Thanks…?” you’re not sure how to respond, especially after all that just happened. “Wait, if you live in my village, why have I never seen you? And how come you’ve never gotten caught using magic?”

“Memory spells, of course,” she shrugs. “Now, let’s get you somewhere safe, alright?”

You nod, and she wraps an arm around you. She takes you deep into the forest until you reach a small house, the glimmer of the fire peering through the windows.

You settle down on a chair while she makes some tea and food. She offers you a blanket and hands you the cup and plate, sitting down across from you.

“So how long have you been practicing magic?” she asks.

“Oh…I…well actually I don’t know how to use any magic,”

“Really? Why were the witch hunters after you then?”

“I was set up, I think,” you say. “There was a little boy floating in the air, and since I was near him they thought it was me. But I wasn’t doing anything,”

“Well,” Agatha sips her tea. “Sometimes magic can manifest itself subconsciously. Maybe you were doing it but didn’t realize it. It’s quite common,”

“But…how would I have magical powers? I’ve never learned it from anywhere,”

“Some people are just born with the gift,” she grins.

You exhale, thinking over what she said. Could it be true? You’ve been a witch all your life without even knowing it?

 -

��That night, Agatha conjures another bed for you to sleep in. But even though she made it as comfortable as she possibly could, you can’t get a wink of sleep.

You lift off the blanket and wrap it tightly around you, getting up slowly and quietly. You walk outside and sit against a tree, looking up at the stars.

You’re sure your family has heard the news by now. Their disappointment of a daughter is finally gone, accused of witchcraft. It seems that the foreseeable future will be spent with Agatha, the only safe person you have.

You wonder just how much she already knows about you. She mentioned she’s heard people gossiping about you all the time in town, yet she still saved you after hearing all those negative things.

Why is that?

“Can’t sleep?”

You jump at her voice, and she chuckles a bit at your reaction.

“Sorry,” you sigh. “I just have a lot to think about from today, I guess,”

“No worries,” she sits down beside you. “So do I,”

“Agatha,” you say. “Why did you save me?”

“Us witches have to stick together. I saw you were in trouble, so I saved you,”

“But you knew, didn’t you? You’ve known I was a witch long before this, didn’t you?”

“I had my suspicions,” she agrees. “Whenever I heard people talk about you, I figured you weren’t like everyone else. But I didn’t know for sure until today,”

“I wish you had taken me before,” you huff, a few tears falling down your cheeks. “It’s been so bad, Agatha, feeling worthless just because you’re different, everyone hates you…”

She pulls you into her shoulder, letting you cry into it, “I know, dear, I know,”

 -

 It takes you a while to come to terms with your potential powers, but as soon as you’re ready Agatha begins to teach you how to use them. You spend your days studying her spell books and practicing simple spells, most of which you fail at.

She encourages you as much as possible, explaining to you that magic is not something you can learn overnight, sometimes not even over years. She tells you that she’s actually thousands of years old (a surprise to you due to her stunning looks) and she’s been practicing for much of that time, and there’s still some spells she hasn’t mastered.

Your impatience still gets the better of you most days, though. You can’t imagine waiting several centuries to get something to work, if you get it to work at all.

One day you’re sitting at the table, trying out a simple transfiguration spell. You wave your hand repeatedly at a potato, hoping to turn it into an apple. It doesn’t even wobble, not even a single spark, but you’ve been sitting here for hours and don’t want to give up just yet.

You nearly fall asleep from exhaustion when all of a sudden it happens. It works.

There’s an apple in front of you. Not a potato, an apple.

“Holy shit!” you scream. “Agatha! I did it!”

You run over to her and point at your small accomplishment.

“Look at you go, darling!” she smiles, hugging you. “At this rate you’ll be changing rocks into cats before you’re 200!”

You laugh, “Oh come on, this is literally just one of the beginner spells,”

“So what? That’s where everybody starts,”

You break out in giddy excitement again, jumping up and down a bit and looking back and forth just to make sure your creation is still there.

Without thinking, you kiss Agatha quickly on the lips.

She stares at you, mouth open.

Before you can apologize, she grabs your face and kisses you hard. She’s everything you’d imagined and more, soft and warm but with a spark you can’t ignore.

When you finally break apart, her hands linger, brushing across your features and in your hair, “I’ve been waiting to do that,”

 -

 Things change after that, but in only the best ways.

Agatha isn’t just your mentor anymore, the only friend who came to your aid.

She’s your everything now, a soulmate, your home.

You tell her all about your life, and she tells you all about hers. As she has significantly more stories to tell, you’ll fall asleep many nights to her whispering all the legends she lived through that no one else knows are true.

She makes you laugh every day, and makes sure you always know how much she cares about you. There’s only so much you can do in your hidden home in the woods, but with magic the possibilities are endless and she’s never short of romantic ideas.

Tonight you find yourself lying your head in her lap while she plays with your hair, close to the fire so you can watch the little shows she creates with the flames.

“What about love?” you ask.

“What about it?”

“Out of all the stories you’ve told me, you’ve never mentioned being in love before,”

“Well,” she sighs. “That’s because I haven’t been,”

“Why not?”

“It’s just never appealed to me,” she says. “Until I met you,”

“Oh,” you grin, looking up at her.

She leans down to kiss you, but you’re broken apart by a loud noise outside.

You shoot up, looking at Agatha in pure panic. Your heart races as the noise gets louder and louder, eventually leading to shouting and knocks at the door.

“WE FOUND YOU!” a booming voice yells.

“Aggie?” you whisper. Everything crumbles around you. Your perfect, happy life, now about to be stolen from you. You have no idea how they found you, if you are about to be dead, if you’ll be able to defend yourself at all.

She kisses you and stands up, “Stay here. I’ll take care of it,”

With a fling of her fingers the door flies open, and the torches the townspeople are holding are burnt out. She smirks, purple smoke covering the area as she goes through them one by one, some just throwing to the side and others suffering a painful death.

She turns their own weapons against them, their own people against them, and makes them regret everything they’ve ever done.

When she returns to you, you’re still in so much shock and panic you couldn’t tell exactly what she was doing.

“Did you…kill all of them?”

“They got what they deserved for threatening us,” she says nonchalantly. “But we’re not safe here anymore. It’s time to find somewhere new,”

“Okay,” you nod as she pulls you against her. “As long as I’m with you,”

“I’ll always protect you, even when you learn enough to protect yourself,” she kisses your forehead. “Always and forever,”

 APPROXIMATELY FOUR CENTURIES LATER

 “I’m back, darling!” Agatha calls, shutting the door behind her.

“How’d it go?” you run to her, grabbing her hands.

“Splendid, that poor Wanda already loves her new neighbor!”

“Wow,” you giggle. “You know I must say, this whole living in a sitcom thing isn’t that bad, you look gorgeous in that 50s dress,”

“Oh darling, somehow after all this time you still flatter me,” she pretends to fan herself. “I have to go back over real quick, alright? Gotta give her this spicy magazine,” she holds her hand up in the air and magically forms one in her grasp.

“Ah! Be sure to get some ideas to use on me when you get back,” she laugh.

“Oh I will honey,” she winks, kissing you before going out the door.

You settle on the couch, looking around at your home. Out of all the places you’ve moved to together, this was by far the weirdest. There’s no color, and everyone besides you and Agatha and Wanda are under some kind of mind control.

You never imagined that day all those years ago would bring you here, spending your life with a beautiful witch and being her partner in all things, even sinister ones. But you wouldn’t have it any other way, and you know this strange town will only bring you more opportunities to practice your magic and help Agatha with her plans.

[villainsandvictimsalliance]

I'm am completely tired of people crapping on villians and not trying to understand their perspectives I am really sick of the fandom doing all this

Me too, anon, me too. That's exactly why I create this blog.

I've said it before, but if someone decides to ignore the villains and their narratives through the manga, that person is not going to be able to read correctly the main arc.

In bnha / mha, the villains are not simple side characters. Shigaraki Tomura has the same relevance as Midoriya Izuku, for example. They are direct parallels and together they work as the representations of the theme. If my speculations and metas are correct, you have all the main characters directly interacting with the villains to reach the climax of the series.

Besides, it really frustraste me that people are unable to appreciate a character and how that character is written just because that said character is not "good". It completely takes the depth of the characters and the complexity of their buildings and create a shallow storyline. Even the characters in kids TV shows have different degrees of good and bad traits, because we are in an era of writing where we're exploring how real a character can get.

People can say "I like shallow, simple characters with very explicit plots that don't challenge my comprehension or my mind" and that would be perfectly fine, there's no shame in liking simple stuff. Instead, they invent every type of excuses to hate characters? And I mean, you can hate a character for your own personal reasons, but instigating a crusade against that character and the fans?

Also, many fans are unable to understand that there are not universal rules to judge characters WITHOUT the context. Lately I've seen so many people bringing things out of context and directly violating the original material not in rational ways (admitting something is fan modified, fan made, personal takes, etc) but in harmful serious ways, by telling others that what they see is the only possible point of view on the matter.

For example, I'm totally able to say that I hate Overhaul in the canon for what he did but I'm pretty much interested in the implications of his writing. I can write many aus about Overhaul without liking the character in a sentimental way, just because I as a writer want to explore the possibilities within this character. I can totally say Boku No Hero Academia is not the best written manga and still entirely love and rant about the worldbuilding daily.

When it comes to the villains, it is simply annoying to me how people refuse to acknowledge that they are some of the best written characters in the manga. Toga is one of the best written female characters in mha / bnha, Dabi has an intricate personal arc that involves the values of the hero system itself and Shigaraki Tomura is— I don't even have words for the amount of dedication Horikoshi put in Tomura. He's been driving the plot along with Izuku this whole time. I can even argue that Shigaraki is better written than Izuku, because he is way more deep in terms of motivations, psychological traits and way of acting.

People is free to hate the villains, but to refuse to see the greatness of their writing? And even then, it's incredible the amount of issues I've seen within the fans regarding the villains.

For example: Spinner as a character represents the racism within the bnha / mha world. He is an incredible character, he narrates the MVA arc, he's been there for the almost every arc of the villains... And yet he lacks popularity. Why? I know studio bones tends to take him out of the anime, but this also has a reason. Why studio bones thinks Spinner is not as relevant or popular as the others? It's safe to assume a group of fans don't care about him only because he "doesn't have the look".

Sometimes when I point out that the League is right about MANY issues within the hero system, some fans go great lengths to defend the heroes and shut down my arguments. I don't personally understand how people likes to ignore the fact that pro-heroes in bnha / mha are a mixture of the police-the army with the celebrity world. In the real world, we're right now living a whole situation regarding the values behind the police existence and the negative side of putting celebrities like they are gods. You can clearly see it reflected on the bnha / mha universe, the villains clearly point out the privileges of the pro-heroes and why the system promoting and manipulating such privileges has created the catastrophe they're going through. But apparently fans don't want to read that? Because heroes are supposed to be good and villains are supposed to be bad, I guess. They don't understand the hero-villain narrative has been dehumanizing the characters and the main arc of bnha / mha is working on it to show that more than heroes and villains and citizens, there are complex humans who don't fall into an absolute.

I'm sorry for ranting about this anon, but every time I read "villain fan" as in derrogatory, I laugh because I'm baffled. Most stories need a good antagonist for it to work. There are MANY types of antagonists and MANY types of villains and they just– they just ignore it? Like it is nothing? And then they pretend to judge the villains by only taking tiny parts of their personalities and stories and they pretend to say that is accurate?

I don't know what to say to that. I can only write meta to help people understand the villains better and show them why they are so important and impressive. If they don't want to acknowledge it, that's their problem.

I love to talk and discuss people with different points of view as long as we're able to keep things respectful, but the minute they start attacking me without even listening to my arguments, good bye.

I thank God for the block button every single day of my life.

Well, I hope you're having a great day, anon. Please remember to drink water, take your meds, eat enough, sleep enough and don't forget to breath deep and use the block button and the content and tag filters as much as you want.

[voiceswithoutlips]

Calico - Chapter Eight

— pairing: Hybrid ot7 x Human Reader (Female) — genre: hybrid AU, fluff, angst, slow burn (like real slow), eventual smut — word count: 3k — Rating: G — warnings: Slight mention of past abuse, description of a panic attack. — beta: Thank you @taegularities​ and @joheunsaram​ <3

Tag List || Masterlist || Schedule

— chapter summary:

Y/N is having a hard day, who will comfort her?

— A/N: Guys, I’m so bad at summaries, if this was an exam my grades would’ve been in the negative. Anyway, welcome to the new chapter! I know I was supposed to post fallen, but somehow I ended up writing Calico instead.

I’ve had a bad case of writer’s block this week so writing this chapter was really painful, words refused to come out of my brain xD I hope you like it! You guys have been so awesome, all your feedback is really helpful. Thank you so much <3

— taglist: @lovelyseomin @anaac28 @ghostkat23 @btswdwsmhrdt @sweeneyblue1 @luvtaeha @taegularities @ aajames217 @ littlewolfieposts @nochujeonjk @hamiltrashlebo @minyoonsh @hoebii @ sunshinee0-0 @egm09 @cstobitk @splaterparty0-0 @missseoulite @mirawi-fox @sea-nevermind-enthusiast @hemmofluke @seaoffangirling @gee-nee @woopetals @secretbangtnn @vminkook-ownsme

Ch. 1  Ch. 2 Ch. 3 Ch. 3.5 Ch. 4 Ch. 5 Ch. 6 Ch. 7 Ch. 8.5

I made my way downstairs in search of breakfast. Ice cream, that’s what I needed. It was that kind of a day. I was tired, jet lagged, and the tension in the house had me on edge. The flight home was fairly uneventful, except for the part where Jimin had gotten scared of flying. He had asked to hold my hand, but by the time we were in the air, the hybrid was practically sitting on my lap. Not that I minded, he was hella cuddly and his purring was downright therapeutic.

When I had asked Jungkook, if it would be okay to bring the newer hybrids home, the bunny had sounded excited, but as soon as we had gotten home, the mood had suddenly shifted. It was not the welcome I was expecting.

First, Jungkook’s hair was the color of the rainbow. His beautiful black locks were turned into a colorful mess, his white bunny ears poking out of it in stark contrast. It was a riot of colors, artfully mixed together, and I felt like I was looking at rainbow pasta. Not that the bunny didn’t pull it off, he looked really cute in it, but somehow I had a raging suspicion that it hadn’t been Jungkook’s idea.

Then, there was the growling match. I had never seen Jungkook so aggressive before. The usually sweet and well behaved bunny had started growling at Jimin as soon as we’d entered the house.. That had set off a chain reaction with Namjoon and Seokjin joining in to protect their younger packmate.

On top of that, I had to go to Seoul for three days to take care of business. I had to visit the main office to attend a few meetings and sign some papers. The whole time I felt guilty about leaving the hybrids alone. I was constantly worried that somehow they’d end up fighting. By the time I came back, somehow, someway, Jason had managed to convince Jimin to dye his hair pink. He was on a warpath.

And lastly, there was the issue of a certain stuffed penguin that went missing -  my nights were sleepless without him. All in all, this had to have been one of the shittiest weeks, and it felt like I was losing my grip on reality.

I stumbled into the kitchen, rubbing my eyes, struggling to keep them open. Unlike Jason, who was cheerfully humming, I was not a morning person. Seokjin was busy near the stove, cooking something and by the smell wafting from the pan, I could tell that it was something delicious. I had thanked every existing god when I’d learned that the sugar glider hybrid was actually an excellent chef. The first morning, he had seen Jason cook breakfast, he’d been horrified, promptly taking over the kitchen after that. Even Jungkook had begrudgingly ate his food.

My stomach grumbled as I peered in the pan. Kimchi fried rice, delicious. Unlike Jimin and Jungkook, the two older hybrids weren’t really that affectionate. I wondered if it was because they weren’t used to me yet or if they just had a different temperament. I needed to do more research on that.

I plopped down on the chair with a groan, resting my head on the counter, hands securely wrapped around my stomach. Jason gave me an enthusiastic “good morning” and I shot him a middle finger, too tired to curse at him. The bastard chuckled.

I was debating if I should stab him with a fork when I felt hands wrapping around my waist, long fingers intertwined with mine. Jungkook bent down to nuzzle the side of my face. His muscular body pressed close. My lips curled into a small smile as I made small happy noises. My brain wasn’t awake enough to form coherent sentences yet. I needed my cup of coffee or better yet, some delicious ice cream.

Jungkook’s arms tightened around me possessively, I could feel the vibrations in his chest as he let out a low growl. I opened my eyes to see Jimin standing near the chair, looking distressed, hands balled into fists at his sides. His tail was swishing rapidly in agitation, ears flattened to his head. He was biting his lower lip, trying his best not to respond to Jungkook’s hostility.

“Bunny no,” I croaked, patting his hands, my voice thick with sleep. I lifted my head, extending a hand to Jimin. Jungkook took his cue and reluctantly let me go, keeping hold of my other hand. Jimin grabbed my hand and with his other one checked my forehead, a worried look on his face.

“Are you sick?” he asked, gnawing on his lip.

“I’m just sleepy.” He giggled at my pout and graced me with a forehead kiss. He sat down next to me, and now I was sandwiched between two hybrids who were holding my hands, glaring daggers at each other. I rested my forehead on the counter with a sigh. What was I going to do with them?

Once again I was in a dilemma. I could scold them and make them shake hands, like a couple of kids, or I could let them handle it on their own, like adults. Taking care of four hybrids was tiring. I shot a quick glance at Seokjin, who was now setting up the table; he was ignoring the two younger hybrids in front of him, but his tail was curled tightly, ears flat. It seemed as if he was tense too.

“Guys, I need breakfast,” I said, reluctantly pulling my hands from their grip. I made my way to the fridge to grab a tub of my favorite ice cream, ignoring the stares that the hybrids were giving me. I had to stop myself from pulling Jason’s ear as I passed him, not now Y/N. The revenge for ruining Jungkook’s hair had to be elaborately planned, something memorable, just like old days. Like the time when I had super glued his shirt cuffs closed, so he couldn't put his hands through the sleeves. He had started this war, I was going to finish it.

“I like your garden!” Namjoon said as he walked in through the back door. Ears perked up, an excited glint in his eyes. I didn’t even know he was out there. I wondered if he could help me with the hybrid situation, he was a pack leader after all. He had informed me about hybrid pack dynamics on the plane while I cuddled a sleepy Jimin. Apparently he was their alpha, the leader of their pack, Seokjin was second in command and Jimin was their maknae. He was excited to meet Jungkook, since he was a rabbit hybrid, they're usually very docile and friendly. Needless to say, we had both been shocked at the bunny's behavior.

“I’m glad you like it. Maybe you could help me with it?”

“Really? I would love to!”

We all moved to the seldom used dining table for breakfast - now that there were six of us, the kitchen counter was too small to occupy us all. I debated where to sit, I didn't want to take sides in the hybrid cold war, so I chose to sit at the head of the table, safe middle ground. I knew Jungkook would want to share the ice cream. I wondered if the other hybrids would too, so I had brought extra spoons, just in case.

"Seokjin, this is delicious!" Jason said as soon as he took a bite of the fried rice. "Where did you learn to cook like this?" I couldn't help but smile at the hint of envy in his voice.

"Madame hired a professional chef to teach me when she found out I liked to cook," he said shyly, ears turning pink from all the attention. It was his cutest trait: whenever someone looked at him, his ears would start to redden.

"That was nice of her," I said dryly, the distaste apparent in my tone.

"She was really nice," Namjoon said pointedly, clearly disliking my tone.

“Clair was kind, she saved us from our previous owners and gave us a home,” Jimin joined him.

"Oh?" Jason said, trying to coax some details. The three hybrids shared a quick look. Jungkook had abandoned his fried rice and was digging into my ice cream, his ears perked, listening in on the conversation.

“My first owner was a gambler, but he didn’t play poker. He and his rich friends were into blood sports. They had their own dog fighting ring. He had raised me since I was a pup, trained me to be a fighter, forced me to participate. One day, Clair saw me at a party and she wanted to buy me, she offered him so much money that he couldn’t refuse,” Namjoon finished with a sad smile. I wanted to go and hug him, but I was sure the hybrid wouldn’t welcome the gesture.

“I…” Jimin paused, looking down at his hands. “The lady who raised me, she brought me clients. She’d sell me to people… sometimes it was for a night, sometimes it was more. She used to tell me that I was her lucky charm. Clair rescued me from her, she was really kind to me.”

The spoon in my hand clattered on the table. There was a ringing in my ear. My limbs were paralyzed, heart pounding in my chest as I felt the panic rise, almost drowning in it. I couldn't get enough air, finding myself on the verge of hyperventilating while my brain went into overdrive. It wasn’t my first panic attack, I was aware of what was happening to me, I knew I had to get a hold of myself. I couldn’t lose it here, not in front of them.

“Y/N? Hey can you hear me?” I turned towards the voice, Jason’s face slowly came into focus, “are you okay?”

“Y/N?” Jungkook said, looking extremely worried. He was holding my hand like a lifeline. I slowly removed his fingers and took my hand back.

“Yes, I’m fine,” I murmured, trying to control my breathing. I got up from the chair with wobbly knees, making my way towards the door. “You guys finish up, I’ll be in my office.”

Redemption, what a joke.

It was well into the afternoon when my stomach informed me that I was hungry. I was swarmed with paperwork. I’d been busy the whole week, running errands, filling forms, trying to keep the hybrids from tearing each other apart, so the paperwork got neglected, and now I was paying for it. I briefly wondered if I should go back home and grab something to eat, but then I remembered the look on everyone’s faces this morning. I had panicked in front of them. I had been feeling restless the whole week without a certain comfort penguin. I was too embarrassed to ask the guys if they had seen it.

I groaned, leaning back in my chair. How was I going to face them? What would I tell them if they asked? A knock on the door pulled me out of my thoughts. “Come in.”

It was Jungkook, holding a bowl. He tentatively entered the office, looking everywhere but at me. His ears were drooping behind him. “I brought you lunch,” he said, setting the bowl on the table.

“I’m sorry I pushed you away this morning,” I apologized, extending a hand towards him, which he took hesitantly. I pulled him in my lap and buried my face in his chest; he smelled like vanilla.

“Are you okay?” Jungkook asked, wrapping his big hands around me.

“No,” I whispered. “But don't worry bunny, I’ll be fine. I just need some sleep.”

“Is it because of Jimin? Can’t we just send him away?”

That made me raise my head to look at him. “Why don’t you like him, bun?”

“He’s too clingy,” Jungkook pouted, jutting his lower lip out. It made me giggle.

“What about Namjoon and Seokjin?”

“They can stay, Seokjin hyung makes delicious food and Namjoon hyung is so cool.”

“Oh, did you talk to them?”

He shook his head no. I almost cooed at him - the poor bunny was too shy to talk to the older hybrids. “Why don’t you try making friends with Jimin? I bet you’ll like him if you got to know him better.”

He buried his face in my hair and shook his head, “...don't wanna.”

I took his hand in mine. “Won’t you do it for me?” I asked dramatically, trying to sound upset.

Jungkook leaned back to look at me, pout more pronounced. He knew exactly what I was doing. “Fine, I’ll try,” he agreed with a defeated sigh.

“Thank you, baby.” I kissed his palm in gratitude. At least he had agreed to try. “Why did you dye your hair?” I asked curiously, running my hands through his multicolored locks.

“Iwantyoutolikeme,” he said in one breath, hiding his face in my hair again.

“What?”

“I want you to like me.”

“You dyed your hair because you want me to like you?” Jungkook nodded. “Oh baby, I already like you!” I squeezed him tight, letting him know how much he meant to me. Is that what Jason had told Jimin? That I’d like him better if he dyed his hair? Jason was diabolical, I really needed to come up with a good plan to get back at him.

“Bun, next time, don’t listen to Jason.”

I was curled up on the sofa with a blanket. It was past midnight but I was wide awake and restless, staring at the ceiling. I had almost turned on the TV, but then I remembered that there were four hybrids in the house with phenomenal hearing, and I really didn’t want to wake them up. And thus, I suffered in silence.

I hadn’t seen the three new hybrids all day; they hadn’t been introduced to the shelter yet, so they stayed at home. When I came back from work, they were already in their room. They had insisted on staying in the same room, something about new places and pack bonding. I was giving Jason the cold shoulder, at least until he apologized for his crimes. And Jungkook was busy playing his new video games.

Clair had saved Jimin.

The thought rang in my head. Why hadn’t she saved me? Would things have been different, if she had stepped in? I had to admit, I was a tiny bit jealous of the panther hybrid. She had saved him.

Madame was so kind.

I was furious. How dare she? Clair had been a coward, had lived and died as one. I knew it in my soul, never in a million years would I ever forgive that woman. She didn’t deserve it.

“You’re angry,” a quiet voice said. I looked up to see a tall silhouette standing at the bottom of the stairs. Seokjin stepped out of the shadows, clutching a pillow in his hands.

“I was thinking. Can’t sleep?”

“Namjoon snores really loudly,” he complained. It made me laugh. The three of them were always attached to the hip, I had wondered if it was because they were uncomfortable here.

“You know we have plenty of spare bedrooms, you can take any of them.”

“Why are you here?”

“I can’t sleep.” I shrugged. Seokjin nodded understandingly, but he didn’t move an inch. “Do you want to sleep on the couch?”

He hesitated, looking as if he was unsure if he should accept my offer before he murmured, “can I?”

“Of course! But I think, a bed would be more comfortable,” I said, moving from the couch to the armchair. Seokjin sat down on the couch, placing his pillow near him.

“Why can’t you sleep? Is it because of what Jimin said?” he asked cautiously, ears erect and attentive.

“I have insomnia.” I shrugged, but Seokjin kept staring at me. I squirmed under his piercing gaze;  staring at me like he could see right through my bullshit. “I didn’t have a good relationship with Clair. She raised me, but she was cruel, unkind. I just… can’t fathom her as someone nice.”

“So it had nothing to do with Jimin being a prostitute?” he asked suspiciously.

“WAIT! Is that what you guys thought? Oh my god, I would never…” I was shocked. No wonder the hybrids were avoiding me like the plague. “I’m really sorry, if it seemed that way but it's not like that. I’m really happy that Clair rescued him. He deserves a good home, a family. I don’t think you’d believe me, even if I told you what my aunt was like. I’m really sorry, if I hurt you guys. But believe me when I say that this is not a place where you’ll be judged for your past.”

“You mean that.” It was a statement, not a question.

“I do.”

“You could sleep on the couch with me?” Seokjin offered sheepishly, ears turning the color of strawberries. I was surprised to see him be so direct. He had been very reserved around me till now, only talking when necessary.

“Are you sure? Won’t you be uncomfortable?” I asked, eyeing the couch. It was big enough to seat five people comfortably, but Seokjin was big too.

He nodded. “I’ll be fine.”

Seokjin adjusted the pillow and laid down on the sofa, leaving room for me. I stood there with my hello kitty blanket, wondering if it was okay. The sudden change in the hybrid’s demeanor was unexpected and I gave up trying to dissect the situation. I had to admit, I was feeling a bit cuddly since the loss of my penguin and I desperately needed sleep. I scooched on the sofa, covering both of us with the blanket, resting my head on his arm.

“You’re not okay,” he murmured, wrapping his other arm around my waist, his tail curling around my thigh.

“I just need some sleep,” I sighed. Seokjin was like a furnace behind me. I wondered why all hybrids were this warm.

“Lies,” he said as he lightly nibbled on my ear. I gasped at the unexpected contact, my heart beating so loudly in my chest that I was sure he could hear it.

“I thought you didn’t like me,” my voice came out breathier than I had intended.

“I do, I just didn’t know how to approach you. You seem so independent, I didn’t know where I could fit in your life. The only thing I could do for Clair was look pretty. But this.... this I can do, I can comfort you. I want to be useful.”

I turned around to look at him. “Oh honey, you don’t have to be useful. You’re you and that’s enough for me. I just want you to be happy.” I lightly kissed his cheek.

“I’m going to be your comfort blanket,” Seokjin said with a smile and hugged me closer.

Previous || Next

[scripttorture]

One of the central characters in a fantasy story I'm writing has torture as part of her backstory. She was captured by an evil race, and one individual in particular put her through a "training" regime designed to turn her into a useful/trustworthy slave. Specifically the goals of the training were:

- destroy her sense of self / agency

- overwrite her ingrained response of healing herself when injured (she has magical healing powers)

- an affectionate or worshipful disposition towards her captors

- immediate obedience to any command

I feel like both physical and psychological torture / mental conditioning are probably appropriate, though I'm leaning away from including sexual abuse. I honestly don't know much about torture at all and the only things that come to mind as producing a result similar to what I'm looking for are the Game of Thrones torture sequence and the use of obdience collars in the Codex Alera book series. The latter is very interesting to me because it is a magical device that inflicts pain in reaction to disobedience but also inflicts pleasure to reward obedience.

I guess I'm just wondering if you have any advice for what kinds of methods would be good to include in a process designed to produce obedience, rather than torture for its own sake or to extract information, as well as if there are any common pitfalls I should try to avoid in writing about such a thing.

The training itself won't be in the book, but I need to be familiar with it for backstory purposes because later in the story this character encounters her torturer again, and is subjected to some further abuse before she finally overcomes her fear and kills him.

Alright well I’m going to be straight up with you: the scenario you’ve presented is a very common torture apologist trope. It’s incredibly unrealistic. And it’s unrealistic in ways that support torture by claiming it can be ‘useful’.

 Which probably means that you’re new to the blog and haven’t heard me give this talk before. That’s OK, we all learn sometime and it’s not my intention to shame you for the fact you’re not as obsessed with this stuff as I am or couldn’t afford to shell out for the books.

 Torture does not produce obedience. The best evidence we have right now suggests it encourages active resistance.

 If you got a lot of your inspiration from Game of Thrones then frankly I’m not surprised you came up with apologia. The torture in that series is incredibly badly handled. And a big part of the point of running this blog is that most people are getting their information on torture from shows like that. Which happens because the research is inaccessible and hasn’t been popularised the way fictional tropes (sometimes fictional tropes literally started by torturers) have been popularised.

 The important thing is what you choose to do now.

 I’m going to break down the problems here and make some suggestions for what you could do instead.

 Firstly: there is no torture or abuse that will guarantee obedience. Pain does not make people meek or compliant or willing to follow commands.

 Torture survivors are not broken.

 They are not ‘controlled’ by their torturers and the suggestion that they are is used in the real world to bar real survivors from treatment. It is also used to bar them from entering safe countries and to argue that they shouldn’t be allowed visas or passports.

 The best statistics we have for any sort of compliance under torture come from analysis of historical French data where torture was used to try and force confessions (something we know torture can sometimes do).

 The ‘success’ rate averaged at 10%. Under torture 90% of people will not comply long enough to sign their name.

 Secondly: torture does not and can not ‘make’ a victim feel ‘worshipful’ towards their torturer. The suggestion is kind of like asking if someone can tap dance immediately after removing the bones from their legs.

 Torturers have no control over a victim’s emotions. They have no control over their symptoms. They have no control over their beliefs.

 And there is no such thing as a torture that can change someone’s mind in a way torturers can control.

 Once again, this fictional trope is used by politicians and the media to justify marginalising real torture survivors.

 I have read hundreds, possibly thousands, of accounts from torture survivors. I’ve read historic and modern accounts. I’ve read accounts from all sort of people from all over the globe. I have never seen a survivor say anything positive about their torturers. I have never seen anything close to toleration.

 A lot of survivors are blisteringly angry at their torturers. A lot of them feel overwhelming levels of spite and some report literally putting themselves at risk of death in order to spite their torturers. And yes, a lot of them are afraid too. None of these emotions are mutually exclusive.

 Affection is impossible. We are not wired that way.

 Thirdly: I understand that ‘evil races’ are a long standing fantasy trope but it would be remiss of me if I didn’t mention the racism inherent in that idea. That some people are ‘born bad’.

 I’d strongly suggest you look up the Black, Indian and First Nations people that I know are on this site critiquing these kinds of fantasy tropes. Because they will be able to explain it better then I can.

 Fourthly: the term ‘psychological torture’ is a pretty common dog whistle for torture apologia.

 Most of the time tortures that people dub ‘psychological’ are things with real, physical effects that lead to lasting injury and death. They just don’t tend to leave obvious external scars. I use Rejali’s term ‘clean torture’ for these techniques. Researchers distinguish them from scarring tortures because they are harder to detect and prove in court.

 The majority of survivors today will have experienced clean torture. They will have no obvious physical scars. But they will still be disabled. They’re ‘just’ less likely to see any form of justice for it.

 Fifthly: torture is a terrible training method because it decreases a person’s ability to learn.

 Torture causes memory problems. It also often causes lasting physical injuries that make performing basic tasks more difficult. And it causes a lot of serious psychological problems which make performing basic tasks more difficult.

 A trained person who was never tortured will always out perform someone whose training involved torture.

 I probably sound quite angry here.

 I write fantasy and I also write about torture a lot. But I can’t imagine that it’s just flavour for a fantasy world or some artefact of the past. Torture is a real, present threat in the country that I grew up in. If I was to return now I could, literally, be tortured and executed.

 If you want to include torture in your world, in your story then you are committing to telling someone else’s story. You are representing an incredibly marginalised group of people and you are presenting that representation to a third group, one that has never had contact with real torture survivors.

 Are you comfortable with the idea of telling your peers that survivors are still controlled by ‘the enemy’? That they’re passive? That they don’t have the capacity to make their own decisions?

 Are you comfortable knowing that the popularity of this message keeps millions of genocide survivors in refugee camps, blocked from citizenship, aid and safety?

 I understand feeling attached to a story and a character. And I understand that this information is hard to find. Hell I’m probably going to end up with the only English copy of one of the pivotal textbooks because I’m shelling out to get it translated.

 You say you want to write a torture survivor. With respect I don’t think you know what a torture survivor looks like.

 I think the most helpful, and kindest, thing I can do here is describe what torture does to people. Because I can’t tell you whether that’s something you want to write. I could try and rebuild this scenario for you (and if you decide you’re interested in that after reading all of this and all the links then I suggest looking through the blog tags for ICURE, torture as training, Black Widow and Overwatch.) But I think you need to decide whether you actually want to write a torture survivor first.

 Here’s a post on the most common torture apologia tropes.

 Here’s the post on the types of memory problems torture commonly causes. I strongly recommend picking at least one.

 Remember that this would never go away. Improvement and recovery in torture survivors means learning to live with symptoms. The symptoms themselves are permanent.

 It’s a hundred different alarms set up on their phone to try and make up for the forgetfulness that makes them miss appointments. It’s the little bottle of perfume in their pocket to bring themselves back to reality when they get intrusive memories at work.

 Here’s a post on the other common symptoms.

 You want something in the range of 3-5 of those, though more are likely if your character is held for years. Each of them should be severe. Every single symptom should have a large, negative, impact on the character’s daily life.

 Do you know anyone with chronic pain? It warps their world. Work can become impossible. Basic household tasks like getting dressed, cooking, cleaning the dishes are done through gritted teeth or not at all. Hobbies and ‘fun’ activities dwindle as they struggle to find a way to do them that doesn’t hurt. Interaction with other people, even loved ones, can easily become barbed.

 Because the pain makes everything more difficult. It means everything takes more energy, more effort. Which means that things fall by the wayside, whether that’s by a pile of mouldering dishes in the sink or snapping at a child. It means tears and the social judgement that follows them. It means the world narrowing as it gets harder to go out.

 Do you see what I mean? Every part of life.

 That’s an example for one symptom. You need to work out at least four. Then figure out how they interact. Then figure out what the character can do to make her life better.

 With chronic pain that can mean painkillers but it’s always more then that. It’s re-learning how to do things; how to put on trousers without aggravating the bad knee, how to sew with one hand. It means learning to cut down on what they do and it means learning a new sort of flexibility; accepting that there are days when the pain is too much.

 It can mean having the same conversation about disability over and over again. With family, with friends, with colleagues. ‘I can’t do that.’ ‘I can do that sometimes but not always.’ ‘That will hurt me.’ ‘I can’t use that chair.’ ‘I can’t get my arms that high above my shoulders.’ ‘I need help with this.’

 And that sometimes means learning a kind of patience that is really barely held back rage. Or perhaps I’m projecting a little with this last one.

 If you’ve never met a torture survivor, if you’ve never looked at a survivor’s work, then all this is difficult. You’re trying to imagine something from first principals with nothing to fall back on.

 So let’s bring some survivors into the discussion here. Some reality.

 Who’s listened to Fela? How about Bobi Wine?

 Fela Kuti was the father of modern Afro beats music. He was tortured multiple times and during one attack, which destroyed his home, his mother was murdered by the military. When he got out of jail Fela marched her funeral procession past the biggest barracks in Nigeria’s biggest city. He wrote two songs about this attack and he doubled down on his opposition to the military government.

 Fela’s music started causing riots.

 You can read what I have to say about him here. You can listen to his music on youtube.

 Here’s an interview with Bobi Wine, which was conducted shortly after he was tortured in Uganda. He talked about how he was determined to go back and continue fighting. Which he did. He even ran against the president.

 I’ve also got a short piece on Searle who was a cartoonist captured by the Japanese during World War 2. His drawings of what happened in To the Kwai and Back are worth seeing. Especially if you want to write atrocities on this scale. They will show you the scale and how to focus on the small, human elements despite that overwhelming scale.

 Alleg’s The Question is pretty much a must, it’s one of the most thorough accounts from the Franco-Algerian war.

 Monroe’s A Darkling Plain is also a must, it’s a series of interviews with survivors of various different conflicts and atrocities. Some are torture survivors. Some are not. It is essential reading because it shows the variety in survivors as well as giving a sense of their lives beyond the symptoms.

 Finally Amnesty International has literally hundreds of interviews and studies available for free online.

 The most important decision for any story with regards to torture is whether it should be there at all.

 So much of this topic is intimidating and so much of it is difficult to write. Not just in the ‘oh this is horribly effecting’ sense but in the ‘I have twelve things to juggle in this simple scene’ sense.

 Ask yourself what torture adds to this character and this story. What does this backstory actually give this character?

 Because if the point is to have her vulnerable and then ultimately triumphing violently over her attackers I don’t think you want a torture scenario. You could get the same thing from a bad guy trying to drug her and having the kidnapping fail when she fights him off, clumsy but effective nonetheless.

 And she could still come out of something like that traumatised.

 Right now I really don’t see this adding anything but torture apologia to your story.

 Handling torture well in a story means accepting that it can’t be the same story without it. It means watching the characters and narrative warp under the weight of it. It means lasting effects, for all the characters and for the world itself.

 I believe you are capable of writing that if you want to, pet. But this ain’t it.

Edit: I’m having trouble seeing the beginning of the answer here. Can anyone let me know if there are formatting issues again please? The first word in the htmal is ‘Alright’ but what I’m seeing on tumblr starts 8 paragraphs in.

Available on Wordpress.

Disclaimer

[extremelyblackandwhite]

innocence - 32

PAIRING: bodyguard!bucky barnes x innocent actress!reader

WARNINGS: drunkness, nightmares.

NEXT CHAPTER

    - Sharon? 

There she stood, in all her elegant and precise posture dignified of someone who had been trained to be a spy. Y/N had spoken to Sharon before yet it had been brief so all she knew about her was what she had learned from the media and what Bucky had told her. Yet, Bucky wasn’t one to share much about his life as a Winter Soldier or an Avenger. Despite all this mystery surrounding the woman standing in the kitchen, she trusted her. She was Bucky’s friend and Steve’s girlfriend, a decorated scholar and agent. If she wanted to hurt her the chance was very, very low. Besides, she doubted Bucky would’ve just gone around giving people his address. He doesn’t even tell anyone but the barista his coffee order, not that it is too hard to guess.

    - Bucky asked me to look after you while he’s gone. - she said before Y/N could even question her. - He said you’d feel more comfortable with a woman watching over you.

    - He really left, uh? - Y/N knew he had left, after all his dog tags were hanging from her closed fist, but her more optimistic self, the more happy look which wanted to believe he was gonna be told this was mistake and he could return to the normal life he had paid by with blood, sweat and tears.

    - Do you wanna go for breakfast? There’s a nice spot just a few blocks away from here. - she tried to distract her, kind smile forming. - I always thought you and me should get to know each other. You know, Steve and Bucky are like brothers so we’ll see each other a lot. 

     - Yeah, I hum ... I just need to get dressed. - Y/N wanted to be her happy, cheery self and she knew Sharon was only trying to make her feel better but all she could think about was Bucky and if he was safe.

She knew she was no super soldier, no super spy, not a witch or an agent but she just wanted to help him. She was already helpless in her own life, merely following along as others guided her, too afraid to step too much out of line in fear of losing what she had worked for. After all, many people wanted what she had, many people wanted a contract with a household agency thus she had to be compliant. She had to step on the breaks before she even turned the key. However, if there was something she had agency on it was her relationships and she wanted to help him. God, she wished to never see that look, the look he gave her that morning after that call. It was pure sorrow mixed with anger and she wondered how long he’d felt that way. She wondered if anyone had tried to help him rather than weaponise him. It was not her choice to decide what Bucky wanted to do with his life, it was not her right to demand him explain her demons to her but it was her choice and her pleasure to be by his side and right now she wanted to be by his side. Even if her mother had raised her not to rely on a man. It wasn’t relying on him, it wasn’t being only completed when a man was around, it wasn’t her feeling incomplete whenever he was around. No. It was none of that. It was merely wanting to hold the hand of someone who had for the longest time not had anyone to hold his hand. It was loving someone so much, she’d be okay with holding his burden with him even if he didn’t want to. It was merely loving someone, darkness and light, and she loved him. 

Her hands gripped the sink of the bathroom, eyes gazing onto the mirror in front of her and as such her own face. She watched every line, every corner, contour and shadow of her face, the dog tags softly dangling around from her neck, the only part of him she had near her. Y/N splashed cold water against her face, trying to let her own optimism flow into what was now a negative outcome. She stepped outside of the bedroom, a soft smile drawn on her features.

   - Should we go? - Sharon suggested, grabbing her coat which was laying over the couch. - It will make you feel better, Y/N. 

   - Yeah, I’m just ...

   - He’s one of the best operatives in the field. - Sharon interrupted her. - He will be fine, I promise you. 

   - You can’t promise me that. - she said as she took her own jacket from the hooks on the wall.

   -  I’ve seen him fight before, Y/N. I’ve been where you are, it’s shit but ... you gotta trust someone who’s strong enough to carelessly break a brick, will be fine. 

Sharon meant well, she knew she did and she was glad she was there but Y/N felt nothing but completely numb to what was happening around her. It seems as he had left with her heart and now she was longing his and hers didn’t get broken in the middle of HYDRA’s crossfire. She didn’t know much about HYDRA or even the Winter Soldier, her parents had shielded her and her siblings from the bad of the world and while she had seen Washington in the TV and remembered when Captain America had been regarded as a traitor, she had never been explained much about HYDRA and all that was out in the internet was glossed over with a paint coat of big, bad monster. Funny how big, bad monsters don’t look like monsters at all. She’d not even been in the country when the first modern Winter Soldier attacks had occurred and she was younger, much more naive. What she could remember was circled with rumours of politicians then blaming every single event on the soldier, turning him into a folklore-like creature but he was not folklore, he really existed. Conscious or not conscious, he existed. She didn’t know how Bucky felt about it, he’d never tell her but what she knew was that he drew a line between who he had been and who he was now, and he hated to cross that line.

The harsh sound of the coffee steamer from the coffee machine took her from her own head. The coffee shop itself was mostly empty, highly due to it being later in the morning and all she wanted to do was return to her bedroom and stay there until she had to go for her photoshoot. However, the waitress was already taking their orders which meant she had to at least stay here until the two of them had eaten whatever Sharon had prepared. 

   - How do you do it? - Y/N blurted out, clearly losing any control over her mind to mouth filter. - The missions ... I mean, Steve must be going on them all the time. 

   - Well, whenever I don’t go ... it’s hell. - she smiled tightly. - One thing is going on a mission yourself, the other one is someone who you love going. And for what? Crocked politicians? 

   - I get a feeling you’re not a big fan of the government. 

   - You’d be right. So, what’s the schedule for today? Bucky didn’t really explain what your job entails.

   - There’s a photoshoot today at 3, then it’s free days until Monday where I have to go on set to film the last scenes. 

    - Photoshoot? Sounds fun. 

    - The Virgin Bride for Vogue.

    - Oh ... - she agent scrunched up her face. - Not so fun.

    - They’re doing an issue on the types of brides. You know ... because type casting not only occurs in Hollywood, it occurs in life too. You got your bridezellas, your over 30 brides, your rebel brides and the virgin bride. Being the virgin bride does fit with the image they want for me. 

     - I never really understood type casting, if I’m being honest. You know, the rat, brit, brat pack. Never really made sense.

     - It’s a marketing strategy. It is easier to market someone as a type rather than a complex person.

She liked photoshoots, she mostly got to dress up and get photographed almost like a big makeover like in those 90s movies she still curled up against her comforter to see. This particular one did make her upset, to be in a white wedding dress, surrounded by soft white fabric was particularly cruel. She knew her wedding was not going to be what she dreamed of a kid and unless she wanted to get her agency or the government in the business, the two of them would’ve had to get married in the civil hall. However, it did not matter to her where she got married, it mattered that the person she wasn’t engaged to was not here. It was almost like being dressed as a left at the altar bride ... like a widow. 

She unpinned the veil from her hair, taking off all the heavy jewellery that had been used to adorn her hair and put it on top of the desk where all the makeup was still open. The dress was pretty but it was big, it was too big, it almost swallowed her, it made her feel small but it reminded of him. She wondered where he was, what he was doing, how he was feeling, if he was safe.

    - That was boring. - Sharon said as she stepped inside the dressing room, holding two coffee cups. - I know that look. What’s wrong?

    - I hate this dress. - Y/N sat down in the chair. - It’s too big.

    - You look like a wedding cake.

    - Right. - Y/N moved the fabric up playfully. - I don’t think I can even move correctly. 

    - You should be thinking about your own soon. - Y/N gave Sharon a confused look. - Steve told me. Don’t tell Bucky, he’ll get upset and then Steve will be upset, big mess.

    - Well, it’s good to be able to speak to someone about it. - she smiled. Only Bucky and her parents knew, so she did not have many people to tell she was engaged to or to even speak about it. 

    - So, how do you envision your wedding dress?

    - Oh, I don’t ... I don’t really think about it. It’s most likely gonna be in city hall so it’s not worth it.

    - What? That’s bullshit. Everyone wears a dress. 

    - I can’t really go anywhere ... the paps would go crazy and that’s the last thing I need.

    - Still, everyone wears a dress even if they go to city hall.

Y/N merely shrugged. Her head was not in the right space and for the first time she was looking forward to go to set. It didn’t matter if being on set was dehumanising sometimes, it mattered that her head would’ve been somewhere else. She knew that as a perfectionist, her mind would be on finishing those scenes and not on Bucky. As she got home, she couldn’t help but get lost inside her mind again as Sharon put some old sitcom on the TV. She was surrounded by him, by memories of him, things that reminded her of him. Looking to her left there were framed photos of him, his jacket was still hanging from the door, the broken shards of porcelain were still on the sink. There were pieces of him everywhere and half of her felt ridiculous it was affecting her so much as it was but she loved him. She loved him.

    - Right, get your jacket. - Sharon got up from the couch.

    - Why? Where are we going?

    - You will see.

Y/N followed Sharon through the half lit Brooklyn night down to the back of several shops. The lights flickered, illuminating the bins filled with black plastic bags which laid in the back fronts of several shops. She watched as Sharon made her way towards a particular store back, taking a key from under a seemingly unseeingly rock which opened the heavy pad lock keeping the door shut. Sharon motioned her head towards the door and Y/N followed her into the dark shop. The agent closed the door behind them before she turned the lights. The bright white lights illuminated the shop floors and she noticed she was surrounded by hundreds of glass see through closets with various white dresses. Was she in a bridal shop?

    - You need to take your mind out of him. - Sharon sat against one of the pale pastel pink couches laid around the store. 

    - Is this legal?

    - You’re engaged to Bucky Barnes, how come you care about legality so much? 

    - I don’t want to get arrested, Sharon.

    - It’s one of my friends bridal store. You said you couldn’t do it without paps walking around and photographing you, so ... here you go.

    - I ... I don’t ... What if he doesn’t come back? - Y/N’s lip trembled as she crossed her arms and looked to the side.

    - Y/N, he will come back. It is one man against a soldier with the strength of five. Trust me, if not for anything else, he’ll come back to you. Now, dress, what dress do you want?

    - I don’t know. 

    - Come on. Pick one and try it on. We are not going home until you try a dress on.

    - Fine.

Y/N stared at the dresses, grabbing the first one she could find in her own size and dragging it onto the dressing room. It definitely was not her type of dress, at least not the type of dress she had envisioned getting married in. It was pure white, sleeveless with a cut which went down to her sternum, skin tight, hugging her body in a flattering way but it just wasn’t her dress. It wasn’t the dress she wanted to get married in, but right now it wasn’t the time to think about what dress to wear when Bucky was out. She shouldn’t be playing dress up. 

She waddled back to where Sharon was sat before she stopped in front of her, hands on her hips. Somehow, she had found some prosecco and plastic flutes and had her feet on top of the pale pink couch. 

   - Are you happy now? - Y/N sighed, mostly out off nuissance. 

   - Don’t give me that tone. - Sharon sipped from her own flute, handing Y/N the other one. - Come on, what do you think?

   - It’s ... uhm ... fine. - her hands gestured around the fabric.

   - What? That’s the first one you try. Why aren’t you crying? It isn’t the one if you’re not crying. That’s what they do in the movies.

   - I can cry.

   - No, spin. - Sharon waved her finger around and Y/N spun around slowly. - It ain’t it.

   - But Bucky ...

   - From now on every time you say the words James, Bucky, Buchanan, or Barnes, you’re drinking. 

   - But I don’t know if Bucky ...

   - Drink. - Sharon interrupted her. Y/N scrunched her face not really believing her but she looked dead serious. She took a sip of her prosecco, placing the flute on the table near her. - Come on, what does your wedding dress look like.

   - I don’t know ... I don’t want something skin tight, I want some floofy fabric.

   - Yeah, go on.

   - And I don’t want it to be too long, I want my shoes to show ... like Audrey Hepburn in Funny Face.

   - Let’s find it. 

Both she and Sharon went through tons and tons of dresses, through so much lace she was sure to dream about it for the next week until they found something that resembled what she wanted. Y/N ended up rather dizzy on the prosecco, not used to drinking too much, running around barefoot with the dress that was her dress in a rather subdued white which showed her legs from the ankle down, a voluminous little shirt which cinched at her waist. A rather short veil fell from her head, pinned to the crown of her head with a fake baby pink rose prong clip. The two ended up laying on the pink couch, heads leaning against the rather comfortable pillows as they nursed the rest of the bottle of prosecco.

   - Okay but I have a question ... - Y/N said, bringing her flute down. - Is it weird dating the same guy who kissed your great aunt?

   - Listen, Steve is a kissing whore. - she tried to say it with a straight face but ended up breaking into laughter. - It’s true. He’ll kiss anyone, unstoppable. The blonde girl from the army, my great aunt, Natasha. If it hadn’t been for me, Steve would be Captain Kisscam instead of Captain America. 

   - Captain Kisscam. What superpowers would he have? 

   - Making people kiss each other? No that sounds terrible. I don’t know ... to be honest what even is Steve’s superpower?

   - Ultimate ... - Y/N broke down laughing before she could continue. She put her hand in front of her chest, taking a deep breathe as she tried not to laugh at the joke in her head. - Ultimate frisbee.

   - You know? Sex on top of the shield? Terrible, so uncomfortable.

   - Sharon!

   - What? I was curious, it is a weirdly unbreakable shield, isn’t it? Besides, that’s not even the craziest thing we’ve done.

    - What’s the craziest thing you’ve done?

    - We did it at the Smithsonian.

    - SHARON! There’s children there. It’s ... a hall of science, and ... memorabilia ... and ... I don’t know, I’ve never been to the Smithsonian.

    - Oh, c’mon. What’s the craziest place where you and Bucky have done it?

    - You said Bucky, drink. - Y/N pointed her flute at Sharon.

    - So did you. Drink. - the two girls drank what was left over in the glasses, throwing them to the side. - Come on. Tell me.

    - I don’t know ... What are we counting as doing it?

    - 3rd base.

    - I do not understand bases. 

    - Handjobs don’t count. 

    - Oh ... then ... the parking lot of the set in his car. 

    - And the car didn’t break?

    - Come on, it’s not that old of a car.

    - It’s ancient, Y/N. - Sharon chuckled, passively looking at her watch to check on the time. - We should get going before the shop opens.

She went back into the dressing room to take off her wedding dress. It wasn’t until then she realised she was still wearing his dog tags, the cold metal against her warm skin, a side effect of the alcohol coursing through her veins. She was reminded of him again on that moment, wondered how he was doing, how he was feeling. She hoped and begged he was okay in her mind, and the memory of him haunted her mind even as she laid down in bed to go to sleep. There was a direct line from wedding gowns and dog tags to her fiance and wherever he was. Her blood distracted by the unhinging of the alcohol coursing along it, was filled with hate. Not for him but for his situation, for how helpless she was to helping him. 

She turned around in her bed, forcefully shutting her eyes as a way to ensure she went to sleep instead of dwelling on those thoughts. However, she simply didn’t have a choice to leave. As her consciousness dissolved into unconscious she woke up in the same bedroom but the environment was blurry, very highly saturated yet the colours were candy bright. However, the environment wasn’t inviting at all and soon broken through the candy bright atmosphere she could hear screaming. She tried to untangle herself from her sheets, running through the bedroom yet her movements were slow and her running was more like a slow motion run. She pushed open the door, coming face to face with the same candy coloured blurred bright world but in front of her was him but not him as she knew him. Not at least as she had known him. His hair was much longer, slightly past his jaw which was covered by a mask, a muffle. His clothing was restricting, the top almost resembling a straightjacket, as if he was dangerous. He was so close but so far away, on his knees with someone whose face was blurrier than the atmosphere itself.

   -  Don’t worry. - the blurred person’s voice was as distorted as the vision, mechanical even as he rose a gun up to the head of a Bucky Barnes she had never met. - We will help you.

   - NO! - she lunged forward as the gunshot echoed through her ears and like a rubber band she was pushed back to reality. She rose her torso from her bed in pure agony, eyes wide open and red, hand holding the sheet against her chest which rose up and down in fast paces.

Looking around, nothing was candy coloured and everything was clear. The room was dark in muddled shades barely lit by the moon light peaking from the small rips in the curtains Bucky had first gotten when he first moved in. Everything was as it was, his sleeping shorts were still hanging from the chair next to the dresser, the dead flowers were still in the vase he had once put them when they were fresh. Everything was as it was, yet she couldn’t shake the feeling that something bad was lurking. The feeling that both of them had just crossed the bridge past the point of no return. 

taglist: @disasterbii @lookiamtrying @buckysteveloki-me @americasass81 @jamesbarnesappreciationclub @lostinthebeans @mariahthelioness29 @oh-nohoney @peaches-roses-sins @theadorasabditory @sipsteacasually @saiyanprincessswanie @booktease21​ @noiralei​ @learisa​ @everythingisoverratedbutgreat​ @uglipotata72829​ @naturalthrone22​ @husherstan​ @mandiiblanche​ @vicmc624​ @newyorkgoddess​ @itsallyscorner​ @chipilerendi​ @emzd34 @writerwrites​ @bluevxnus​ @that-girl-named-alex​ @captnrogers​ @nsfwsebbie​ @sarge-barnes-sir​ @niki-is-a-thing​ @cynic-spirit​ 

[obae-me]

Upside Down- CH 2

Author’s Note: I swear I don’t hate Mammon, he just happens to be the subject of everything right now, but don’t worry, the comfort will come. Just hold out for the next one, the healing will start I swear!

Tags: Cussing, fighting, unhealthy coping mechanisms, mentions of death, toxic friendships, blackmail (As always, read safely, feel free to ask about any of these tags) 

Word Count: 4683

Previous Chapter                       Next Chapter

An Unlucky Break

Honestly, at this point, you weren’t sure what was worse. The humans? The endless noises? Or the devil-forsaken sunlight?! Groaning, you pulled another blanket over yourself, tugging it up above your head. Taking the pillow, you used it to try to muffle the sounds of the outside world. It was all so much. How did the humans even get any sleep? How could they see with all the blinding sun rays? You cocooned yourself tighter, imagining that you were back inside your home where nothing but endless moonlight existed and you were left exactly how you wanted to be. Alone.

But all those dreams and imaginations were dashed when you heard a single name roar throughout the house. “Mammon!” If it wasn’t his name, it would be another. They always seemed to be screaming at each other for something around here. At least they had the decency to leave you--

The door to your bedroom door opened, then shut itself quietly, the sound of panting followed by whispered cursing invaded your space. “Why’s he always gotta be on my ass? It’s just a little money, he’d spend it all on useless plastic or junk anyway. It was better off in my hands for sure. For sure...” A little bit of pacing, a small chuckle. “Just gotta lay low in here. It’s abandoned and dark as hell, he surely won’t find me.” It was bitterly amusing how your supposed “babysitter” seemed to have forgotten all about you. Although you stayed quiet, not really in the mood for conversation. Besides, you always had a knack for blending in.

The both of you sat in silence--well, relative silence, since it was obvious the human didn’t seem to understand the definition of being still. He kept mumbling to himself. But the two of you listened to whichever brother was on the hunt go rampaging through the house. Doors kept opening, slamming shut, the footsteps pounding angrily against the floor upstairs. Then it all went quiet. The brother of greed seemed as hopeful as you were that it was a sign they’d given up the chase. Mammon sighed, much too heavily. So of course, the handle slammed against the wall as the room was raided. “There you are, you--you---you!” Then the fighting started. A heavy sound of a body hit the side wall.

“Son of a--get offa me, will ya!? I don’t have your damn money!”

The newcomer growled. “That’s the problem!” The scuffle didn’t seem to end. Neither of them really dug too badly into each other, pushing, shoving, slapping. It was hard to tell if you were intrigued or annoyed. Regardless, you slowly took the blankets off of you, getting a better look at the fight. It was immediately disappointing, or maybe this was as intense as humans could take it? Mammon had his brother’s head in some sort of lock, while the attacker was simply tugging at Greed’s hair with two full handfuls. Neither of them were getting anywhere. No, this was definitely lackluster.

You were back to being annoyed. Sitting up, speaking up finally, you were going to ask, ‘can you two beat each other up elsewhere’, but you couldn’t even get that far. “Can you two--” were the only words you managed to utter before the both of them shrieked in startled fear, high-pitched enough to leave your ears almost ringing. The fighting dropped immediately, the humans instinctively grabbing onto each other in a supportive hug. They stayed like that for a good while before one of them broke away to flick the light on. The intense brightness had you blinking away spots.

Bright blue hair, a shirt with some sort of strangely drawn figure with...large proportions, a curved device around his neck, the brother’s previous assertiveness instantly melted. “W-who are y-you?! God, Mammon, call the-the cops or something!”

Sheepishly, Mammon caught his breath and cleared his throat, the look of recognition coming back to him. “Wait, Levi, this is the guest Lucifer told us about.” The one you were supposed to take care of. Not that I care.

“N-nani?!” So this was Levi Morningstar. Everyone labeled him as Envy. The third eldest and third strongest. So many of his demon followers drove themselves beyond mad, jealous that they couldn’t be as envious as the human. And if that was enough to tell you about this brother… “I thought that was, like, a prank or something! How long have they-they-they…” With every word, he seemed to turn more pink, and yet his face looked almost angrier. “Why didn’t you tell me?!” And he was back to fighting, taking Mammon by the front of his shirt. “I’ve been singing the opening song to ‘Kiss Me I’m Your Princess’ in the shower for the past week!” It was true. He had. “That’s supposed to be private!”

Mammon shrugged, his forearms raising with his shoulders. “Not very private if the whole neighborhood can hear ya, and besides I did tell ya! You were just so upset about the money you must’a not been paying attention!” He shoved Levi off of him. “So that’s on you!”

The older of the two really knew--or maybe he didn’t know--exactly how to push buttons. Levi, his anger reignited about the mention of his money, knocked Mammon to the ground. “Scumbag!”

Mammon pushed his brother off with a knee to the gut, turning the tables and getting on top of his opponent. “Fuckin’ weeb!” It was obvious Greed was the more physically capable, his speed and reactions praiseworthy, perhaps even for average demon standards. However, Levi was bringing his own to the fight--if you could even really call it a fight. He was more adept at using his surroundings as well as guessing predictable movements to stay in the ring.

Should you stop it? Human bodies were much more fragile than demon ones weren’t they? While they might have not been digging their heels into swinging, they were still aggressive, and it was only escalating. The binding marks around your wrists left a dull heat across your skin. Like it or not, you had to keep them in decent health to observe them. So you got up, placing your body between them. They quickly put their fists down, although Levi’s got dangerously close to your face, his knuckles so close they tickled your cheek. The intensity of battle fizzled instantly, and Levi touched a sore spot on his chin. Looking right past you, the blue-haired boy scowled. “You’ve got 24 hours, Mammon, you hear me? If you don’t, I’m taking this straight to Lucifer!” He went to leave, but then turned around to add something else in. “I’m sure he would compensate me by letting me sell your dumb bike!” Again, he went to the door...and again, he stopped to add another comment. “And-and forget about me lending you money ever again!” Finally, he slammed the door behind him. Which meant that finally the fighting was over with. Peace and--

Someone took you by the shoulders, giving you a shake. Every nerve in your spine sparked, the feeling of being touched burning you up and leaving you chill all at once. You slapped the hands off your body and took a good few steps back. “Are you an absolute idiot?!” Mammon yelled. 

Who was he to talk to you like that? “Excuse me?”

“Struttin’ up and steppin’ right in the middle of a fight, did you wanna get hit?!” He outstretched his hand, ready to move your head. “Did he land one on ya?”

Blocking him, you used your arm to cover your face. “Don’t touch me.” The words came out harsh and yet desperate. You didn’t mean to sound so emotional. They left your chest heavy, and apparently the human picked up on it. He backed up, his arms dropping. He turned his head away from you with a snap of his tongue.

“Damn it! How am I supposed to pay him back by tomorrow?!” Mammon started pacing, the wheels in his head visibly turning. “First I lose my precious Golide, I can’t lose Ruby!” He really was near crying over this. He verbally shouted out ideas, most of which were getting more loans from others to pay off the one to his brother. Not a smart option. But, somehow he came to an even worse conclusion. “I’ll just have to gamble it back!” Suddenly he looked excited. “Today is a lucky day, I can feel it! That way, I get to have fun and Levi gets his money back! Win win!” Or a lose/lose, if he, you know, loses. But that aspect didn’t seem to even dawn on him. “Come on, get dressed!”

You blinked. “Huh?”

“Well, you’re coming with me, aren’t ya? Don’t you want to get out for a bit? I haven’t even seen you out of this room once, made me completely forget about ya!” He laughed, every bit of negative emotion gone from his body once the addiction of gambling was rushing through his veins. Without even really giving you a choice, he was opening your suitcases which you hadn’t bothered to unpack, handing you an outfit. “Come on, come on! I do better with someone there watching me!” Were all humans this into invading personal space, or was it just him? “It’ll be fun! I’ll show you my home away from home!”

Your top eyelid started to twitch. “Don’t you have someone else to drag around?” It was meant to be spiteful, maybe a bit hurtful to get him to go away, but he just slowed. Then a familiar hue clouded his bright eyes, dulling them. A color you knew too well, the color that stained your soul. The loneliness of isolation.

He shook his head, and although you could feel a bit of his aura cry, he just smiled. “Nah, n-not many people are good enough to hang out with the Great Mammon! So-so be thankful I’m inviting you along!” It was demanding, brash, boarding on rude, but yet it came off to you like a beg.

It nearly churned your stomach at the thought of casually spending time with a human...but...those were your commands. You couldn’t hole yourself up in this room forever. At some point you’d be expected to hand in your findings, to try to restore these brothers to see if humanity was capable of change. You turned over the human clothes in your hand, the style of them vastly different than you remembered human fashion being. Sighing out of your nose, you gave in. “Fine.” His expression almost blinded you as badly as the sun.

It was very clear to you that there wasn’t going to be a single mode of human transportation that you enjoyed. They were all loud, bumpy, and the smell of metal and plastic that stayed in your nose and settled on your tongue made you gag. Mammon, however, was extremely enthusiastic about them. He had brought you to a special room of the home called a ‘garage’ , a special resting room for the family’s many...many vehicles. Each sibling seemed to have just one car, but Mammon had a few. He had waved you over to his specific end of the large room, gesturing to--as he referred to them-- his treasures. A bright yellow low-set sleek one that he named ‘Amber’, a tall black one with a carriage for storage attached to it--called a truck apparently, but he just called it ‘Ob’. But the one he adored most was one that looked vastly different to the others. This was Ruby, the one Levi threatened to sell in exchange for the missing loan.

Although, if you were being honest, you didn’t understand why Mammon didn’t let him. “It’s broken,” you claimed.

“What?! My baby?!” He left your side immediately, scouring over it, his eye scanning over every inch of the thing. “What are you talking about? She looks fine.”

Was he blind? You pointed to it. “It’s missing two wheels. All your other motorized vehicles have four.”

Waving a hand at you, he scowled. “Don’t joke around about something like that! I thought you were serious for a second!” I was serious...Oh well...It wasn’t anything you wanted to concern yourself with. He threw his legs up over the bright red two-wheeled thing, sitting on it like one might a horse. After he fiddled with it for a second, it roared to life. The sound pounding in your head, meanwhile, Mammon was thrilled. “Ah, yeah!” The machine continued to make this deafening deep...scream. You brought your hands up to cover your ears. Did they like the noise? Was basic human hearing so dull that they didn’t find it inconvenient at all? “Come on! The sooner we get to a casino, the sooner I can get more monay!” Isn’t it supposed to be Levi’s money? Mammon seemed adamant that you join him on the...Ruby. You shook your head, and with a little frown, Mammon turned the infernal thing off. “What, are you motion sick or something? Usually people would die to take a ride on a bike like this! With me!”

“Do you have something quieter?”

Dismounting the bike, he pulled a ring of keys out of his pocket. He clicked a button and the black truck lights flashed. “I’m already startin’ to regret this. You’re a buzzkill, you know that don’t you? And here I thought Lucifer was the one who didn’t know what fun was like.” He opened the door and hoisted himself up into the car. It already sounded much quieter than Ruby. It still rumbled and made your heart leap, but it seemed steady. It appeared to you that luckily most cars operated the same way, so you remembered how to pull the handle to open the door. Settling yourself in the seat, you shut the opening behind you, trying to calm your already churning stomach. Waiting for the thing to start moving, you braced yourself, but the truck stayed motionless. “Hey, man, I know I just called you a buzzkill and all, but I can’t afford another ticket right now, so seatbelts on.”

You could only understand about half of those words. Trying to blend in with the human world was going to be harder than you thought. Maybe some studying was in order...But you had to come up with some sort of excuse that made it appear as if you knew what he was telling you. “I don’t have one.”

It was practically an insult that he looked at you with such disappointment. “Come on, playing dumb won’t work on me, Lucifer’s already pissed from the last time I got pulled over.” Individually the words themselves made sense, but the phrases were almost gibberish to you. Taking too long trying to piece things together, Mammon sighed, leaned over, much too close to you, reaching behind your head. He tugged on an extending fabric, pulled it across your body and attached it to a clasp near your hip. As it fastened, it clicked. A seat belt. Strange. Why was it necessary for them to restrain themselves like this? “Rule number one about hanging out with Mammon,” the human started pulling a similar belt around him. “When you’re in my car, I’m in charge!” He hit a button, extremely loud music pouring out of every corner of the car, making the entire carriage thump. Screaming to be heard above the audio, he tugged on a lever in the middle. “Whoo! Roulette, here I come!” Your insides lurched as the front of the room lifted open and Ob moved forward.

Off in the distance, two adolescent humans were pushing each other around, speaking much too loudly about idiotic things. The car a little ways to the right of you had a human with long hair and tired eyes sucking on a piece of metal, blowing smoke out of their mouth. And as lines of more vehicles chugged on, and people talked in ways you didn’t comprehend, it started to hit harder how far you were away from home. This was a foreign land, filled with sins and distractions at every corner. And...food dipped in liquid apparently. As you raised the bag, you felt the slick underside of it rub off against your fingers. “Oi, oi, oi, oi, don’t be like my brother and get greasy fingerprints all over the place! I just got Obby detailed!”

You placed the bag in your lap. “I thought this machine was named Ob?”

He smiled to himself. “Ob, Obby, they’re the same. Technically, it’s Obsidian, but I like to give ‘em nicknames you know? Anyways, I ain’t like Lucifer, you can eat, but just be careful, ya hear!” He reached a hand into his own bag while the other hand was on the directional wheel. He pulled out a...fried stick and put it in his mouth. Mammon had stopped by...it was called a drive-through. At least you were starting to get the hang of their fairly straightforward naming system. You didn’t want anything, but apparently he got you something anyway. You didn’t even know what was in here, and honestly you were a little scared to find out. It was...dare you say, rather polite of him to consider feeding you. “Lucifer’s gotta give me my card back for sure! For looking after you so nicely and all! You better be thankful! I don’t do this stuff for anyone, just so you know!” And of course his ego ruined the gesture completely. Every action he made was a move to get him closer to more material gain.

Appetite was lost on you, not that this sickly human food was appealing anyway. It was all too much. The stimuli of everything was driving you mad. You put the bag beside you, leaning against the inside of the car, trying not to notice the seatbelt and how suffocating it all felt.

Suddenly, the deafening music turned down. “Hey, hey, what’s wrong? You’re not feeling sick are ya? No being sick in my treasure!”

You were sick. Sick of all this. “I want to go home.”

Something about that must’ve resonated with him. He sighed, turning his head to look out the window. “Ah, geez…” Quickly, the mood turned awkward. “Hey, I mean, I can always turn around if you want.”

“Not your home. Mine.”

Mammon remained quiet at that, something that seemed like a rarity for him. It didn’t last for too long though. “They said your folks died, or something like that right?”

The lie the prince had come up with nearly made you laugh. You let out a single scoff instead. “Something like that.”

Even though you hadn’t been around Mammon for too long, he ended up surprising you. “That sucks, man...Listen...I-I know what it’s like.” The tone of his voice sounded uncertain, like this had been the first time in a long time that he’d been honest, vulnerable. The pitch was unsteady, struggling to try something on that he hadn’t worn in ages. “Losing someone...it stays with ya. Broke my family apart...if you can even call us that anymore nowadays. Once she was gone, we all found a different way to fill in the gaps.” There was humanity in him yet, buried deep beneath heavy sorrow. “But you know what helped me out the most?” You raised your head, actually wanting to look at him for the first time since you’d known him. Mammon pulled up into a lot littered with a bunch of other human cars. Just as you glanced at him, the goodness and seriousness in him retracted. He glanced out the window at a large shiny building. His particular “fill” he had mentioned had such a tight grip on him, it was hard to tell if he understood how much it controlled him. The lights of the casino hypnotized him, erasing any sense of despair that lingered in him. Or perhaps covering it up was a better explanation. This was no cure. “There’s nothing quite like a casino! Trust me,” He patted you on the shoulder. “Play a few games and you’ll forget that you wanted to go home in the first place!” Ob turned off, the shudder of the frame dying. Mammon hopped out of the car without a second thought, treading towards the entrance, leaving you behind. For a moment there had been awareness, a connection. Now, there was only one thing on his mind. Greed.

There were two options for you. Stay in this stuffy thing or follow the human inside. Neither were great options, unluckily. However, now your curiosity was piqued. Was it truly possible for this Morningstar to change? But did you have the patience to try? Maybe this was your own gamble. You landed on the solid grown below, making sure to remember to shut the door behind you. The bright white hair of the human was in your sights for only a second before he was engulfed in a crowd. At the worst, it might be fun to watch him fail...So inside you went.

If you thought outside was overstimulating, you were drastically underprepared for the contents of a human casino. Screens were flashing, noises rang out from every single inch, the carpet was almost louder than the buzzing in your ears. The aroma of tainted beverages and smoke sent your vision swirling. People bumped into you, some blind from crying, some far too lost in their indulgences to notice you were there. Mammon was gone. But even amongst all these attacks on your senses, there was one feeling that rose among them all. The presence of demons. You should’ve known a place like this where people sold their soul for the rush of a Jackpot would be where your kind thrived.

Knowing your luck, today would be the day Mammon lost more than the pot. You had to find him, quickly.

A circle of hell…this is what this had to be right? An hour had passed and still no sign of the cursed human. The only thing you kept note of was the same dumb sign that promoted some sort of membership that was obviously a borderline scam. You had seen it three times already…you were walking in circles. It wasn’t your fault! This place was a maze, a blinking, haze filled maze. You were running out of options, as well as sanity.

A large bulky man stood against the wall, keeping an eye over the many glossy-eyed consumers. You headed up to him. It took a second for him to notice you staring. “Yeah?”

“Have you seen a white-haired man, about this tall,” you moved your arm to about where he was against your own height. “Wearing a brown jacket?”

The man huffed out a laugh. “You think I remember everyone that walks past me? Listen, I’m just here making sure people behave. I’m afraid I can’t help you.”

Useless. Turning your back on the human, you walked off again, head on a swivel. Your eyes spotted a woman, still sober, also looking around for someone, maybe she’d spotted who you were searching for instead. Coming up behind her, you didn’t wait this time for them to notice you. “Excuse me?”

“Hm?” Brown curls bounced across her forehead.

“I’m looking for someone. Have you seen-“

The woman’s attention left yours, looking up past you. “Oh, there he is!” Following her gaze, you looked over your shoulder to see someone else entirely. Someone who was without a doubt not Mammon. Without listening to the rest of your question, she brushed you off, matching strides with the person she had found. So annoying…

Then a warm sounding voice pricked your ears. “I’m sorry I couldn’t help but overhear.” A different human man approached, someone with shaggy light brown hair with eyes to match, the shadow of a fresh growing beard darkening his jawline. His black leather jacket hung loose off his body, a few sizes too big, like it wasn’t his. Not to mention it smelled of cologne and cigarettes. “You’re looking for someone? I might’ve seen them, I’m good with faces.” His smile was wide and spotless, so flirtatiously perfect you had your doubts about him.

But any help would be worth it at this juncture. “White hair, golden brown eyes, a -“

“Mammon Morningstar, right?” The answer was so sudden. “He’s in here all the time, it’s hard to not remember him, you know? Well, that and he happens to be a good friend of mine.” The lungs in your chest stopped as soon as he put his arm around your shoulders. “Tell you what, why don’t we go find him together?” The mysterious helper started dragging you forward, and as he did, a few other people pulled away from their spots in the background, carefully weaving through the crowd, trying not to seem as if they were following you...but they were. Everything in you was tempted to tear the human off of you by his arm and chuck him into the nearest machine...but that would garner attention. “You know, it’s weird…” your escort wondered. “I’m really good with faces, and yet, I can’t seem to recall seeing yours. Where are you from?”

As blandly as you could, you gave him a completely honest half-answer. “Not here.”

The man laughed. “Oh, good!” Then he turned his questions in a different direction. “How long have you known Mammon? Because he hasn’t...ever mentioned someone like you before...and Mammon tells me everything.” The amusement was sour, bitter, just like this human’s soul. Simeon had been shocked when he’d discovered you’d never taken a mortal soul. But how could you when they were always so...revolting?

Your fondness for humans had already sunken to the bottom, but somehow you found yourselves wishing to be annoyed by Mammon rather than this…human in devil’s clothing. ”You’re asking all about me, and yet, I don’t know a single thing about you. What’s your name?”

Never give a magical being your name, that was the first thing legends taught humans, at least, the last time you visited they did. Either legends had long but died out, or this human was cocky enough to pass out his name to you on a silver platter. “It’s Cory.” As soon as he handed himself to you, demonic insight did the rest. Glimpses of terrible secrets, of all the wrong he had done in his life. What greed and anger had encouraged him to do. He was dangerous, and this human had Mammon centered in his focus. “But all my friends just call me Cash. So feel free to call me that too, yeah?” You opened your mouth, ready to finally get rid of this pest and drag Mammon to his house if you had to, but Cody’s arm left you. Outstretched, he moved away from your side to greet another familiar face. “There’s my Golden Boy!”

Standing in front of a table, rattling around dice in his palm, Mammon stopped himself from rolling them. At the sound of Cody’s voice, his shoulders tensed, his expression losing it’s playful tone. Cody’s hand’s gripped Mammon’s shoulders as he came up behind him. “C-Cash, fun-funny seeing ya here!”

It was obvious ‘Cash’ also wanted to avoid unwanted attention, although anger started to darken his eyes at the sight of his ‘good friend’. Ignoring the stuttering, Cody smiled. “How’s it going? Winning anything?”

Confidence faltering, Mammon tried to chuckle. “N-not yet.”

Three of the bodies that had been shadowing you and Cody stood directly behind you, far too close for comfort. There was something odd about their presence...You were picking up a smell, something you were sure human’s couldn’t possess. Yet, each of the humans behind you possessed something that was shockingly similar to dragon’s breath… Leaning in a bit closer to Mammon, Cash let some of his true colors show. “Well, I sure hope you start winning something soon.”

Another loaner had come to collect his dues.

Tag List!

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[autisticcassandracain]

I have many thoughts on the weird phenomena in the DC fandom and the Batfam fandom specifically where probably the majority of people just straight up. haven’t interacted with the source material. and almost all of those thoughts can be summarized as ‘lmao that’s weird and mildly concerning’.

and because I’m annoying I will list them all here right now <3

1. To preface this post, I mean, obviously, comics are inaccessible as all hell, both in the disability kind of way and the ‘you need to understand the concept of hypertime to fully comprehend the DC timeline’ kind of way. Because of this, even if you don’t have a disability that prevents you from reading comics, I don’t think it’s unreasonable to look at the amount of comics you need to read to have even a base understanding of a character and go ‘no thanks <3′ and just enjoy fanart and fanfic in a vacuum. Ultimately, this is fandom, this is supposed to be fun, it doesn’t really matter.

2. That said, it’s VERY weird to me that the majority of this fandom just straight up hasn’t interacted with the source material, and moreover, that it’s considered rude to tell people that they should do so. It’s especially weird considering the amount of fanon-only fans I’ve seen who straight up have a superiority complex over canon. The idea that it’s gatekeeping to tell fans of something to actually interact with canon is just. so weird, and a fundamental misunderstanding of what ‘gatekeeping’ actually entails. 

3. But honestly I’m less interested in discussing the ways in which canon and fanon fans should interact with each other (personally, I think it would be helpful to create separate tags of some kind, but that’d require quite a big overhaul of the current fandom state) than in figuring out how this actually happened in the first place. On the one hand, it’s obvious; long-running superhero comics the way DC writes them have made themselves so thoroughly inaccessible that most people are simply too daunted to even try. Most media has a cohesive beginning and end (or at least, a planned end somewhere). Comics just... don’t.

But I do think it says something that, even among people who are clearly interested in the characters (since they have, you know, entire blogs about them), the effort to get into comics just seems to be too much to even bother. This really doesn’t bode well for the future of DC Comics. Obviously, I am no expert on anything at all ever, but I’d personally be surprised if DC survives beyond the few decades, at least in its current form/without a big overhaul.

4. But on the other hand, I don’t think the confusing state of DC Comics is the only thing to blame here. Fandom has a well-known problem with reducing any character down to archetypes to more easily ship and write fic/make content with. This problem is particularly prominent in fanfic, which, if you read enough of it, you’ll eventually start seeing not just the same tropes and trends, but essentially the same fics over and over again. And not just within the same fandom; everywhere, or every large fandom, at least. 

Fanon Batfam is entirely built on a bunch of those tropes; insecure/depressed sadboy Tim, team mom with optional hidden trauma/emotional problems Dick, bad boy with a heart of gold + sadboy combo Jason, abused sadboy Damian/angry easily-villified-for-fic-reasons monster Damian, good dad Bruce for found family fic and bad dad Bruce for angst fic, etc. This all culminates in a found family dynamic that’s generic and malleable to whatever fic the writer wants to write.

(This isn’t getting into the ship fic, which I avoid like the plague because the vast majority of it is incest, but I’d bet real actual money that the tropes in those fics fall under what is often preferred by the Migratory Slash Fandom.)

By having a decent excuse not to get into canon (the inaccessibility of comics) and a, by now, well-established fanon fandom, many fans feel free to use the batfam fandom as essentially an excuse to write whatever fic with reduced archetypes and tropes they personally feel the itch to write, without having to bother with even consuming a canon. This is compounded by the fact that canon itself is often contradictory and frankly bad, meaning that whatever interpretation of a character you want/need to go for your fic is at least theoretically backed up by canon (for example, you can just as easily cast Bruce as an abusive shithole dad who his kids need to get away from as a loving father figure who cares deeply for his children), which you can always use as a defense if people question your characterization.

5. This focus on fandom trends and tropes over actual creativity or care for the characters is also visible in the way bigotry manifests in this fandom; namely, in literally the exact way you’d expect. The female characters and characters of colour are shuffled to the side, non-existent, vilified, and/or reduced to harmful stereotypes. 

Barbara is probably the one I saw the most often in fanfic, but usually just as ‘Dick’s girlfriend’, and even then, she was often vilified for Dick angst (especially in fics about examining Dick’s trauma from his canon sexual assault; Kori also often gets the short end of the stick in those). After that, probably Stephanie, who fanon fans don’t really seem to know what to do with, so she’s basically just there as comic relief waffle girl, most of the time, though sometimes she can be used to either further Tim angst or further vilify Tim, whatever the fic calls for. Cass has gotten included more in batfam fics as of late, likely in response to critiques of fandom racism for leaving her out, but again, it’s clear people don’t actually know what to do with her. She’s often reduced to a racist stereotype of a quite, stoic therapist for whatever guy du jour needs it. That, or she’s in Hong Kong and just not there. Duke especially gets left in the dust in fandom, usually just being non-existent, but when he’s there, he’s almost always nothing more than the straight man for the actual fun characters to play off of. Talia probably has it the worst, though, and almost universally gets vilified by fanon stans in order to write sadboy Damian.

All of this is extremely predictable behaviour and falls entirely in line with general fandom misogyny and racism; ignoring or vilifying women and characters of colour, or using them as very minor characters at best. The only two characters of colour who aren’t regularly left out of fic are Dick and Damian, who are both also conveniently the two characters most often drawn and written in a whitewashed manner. In addition, there’s a real trend of demonizing Damian in fanon fics where he isn’t written as an abused sadboy, which I’d argue is in no small part due to fandom racism, considering Damian’s behaviour is in no way as bad as Jason’s, who doesn’t get anywhere close to the same demonization and gets woobiefied instead. I also find it convenient that Damian is probably the batboy who receives the most vilification in fic, when he’s the most obviously non-white of the batboys they’re willing to acknowledge.

Fandom often cries for more diversity in canon, only to ignore the diversity already there and focus on the same generic white guys. The batfam fandom is a brilliant example of this.

Which is not to say that fandom racism and misogyny isn’t present in the canon parts of the fandom (and canon itself); it absolutely 100% is. But I’ve found that canon fans are also more likely to like and care about at least one of the characters I’ve listed as ignored/vilified, and are willing to create and consume content for them, whereas fanon fans... aren’t, really. I’ve never seen a fan of fanon Cass the way I’ve seen fans of fanon Dick, for example. Obviously, this could just be by coincidence, or I’ve just surrounded myself with people like that, but it’s been a trend I noticed. Racism and misogyny is present in every part of this fandom and should be addressed as such, but I feel like it manifests the most blatantly in the fanon parts of this fandom. 

(I’d also recommend the articles Migratory Slash Fandom’s Focus and Beige Blank Slates, which expand more on the type of fandom racism I think is especially prominent in the batfam fandom, as well as literally every article in the What Fandom Racism Looks Like series.)

6. All this leads me to conclude that the majority of fanon fans don’t actually like the characters all that much; they’re convenient excuses for them to participate in fandom. Which I also think is, in no small part, a reason why so many of them react so negatively to being told to pick up a comic; they came to this fandom specifically to consume it as a fandom, because they wanted the fandom experience without having to consume a canon. 

This is not a phenomena unique to the batfam fandom (again, see the Migratory Slash Fandom), but it does fascinate me. While fandom is often said to be an experience focusing on transformative art, I think it’s also safe to say that, especially as fandom has become more mainstream, an increasing amount of people are looking to it less as a way to engage with their favourite pieces of media, and more as a type of media in and of itself. I think the reasons for this are similar to the reasons mass media entertainment like the MCU are so popular; you gain a lot of enjoyment out of it with very little risk involved. 

By consuming the same fics of the same characters (or the same archetypes) over and over again, you are rarely at risk of being challenged or even disappointed. It’s often very clear right from the start whether or not a fic will appeal to you, and if it isn’t, it’s easy to just look for another one. It requires less emotional investment than most other types of media, even ‘popcorn media’ like the MCU - or, yes, DC Comics. It’s safe, it’s enjoyable, it’s comforting, like McDonalds, but just like McDonalds, it’s ultimately bland and unsubstantial. 

7, TL;DR. Ultimately, I don’t think it’s like, wrong to enjoy the fanon version of the batfam without wanting to engage with canon, and I certainly don’t think it’s okay to harrass people over it. But I do think it’s in large part based on a desire to interact with fandom rather than other pieces of media because people are scared of being let down by those pieces of media (or worse, just uninterested in actually thinking), which is mildly concerning. 

[elriell]

Thank you very much! I find it hard to cut them back and be less detailed to be honest. So let’s dive in to it, two quick points before we start;

There will be no hate here as every ship is valid, I simply going to explain why I believe Elriel is more likely to happen than Elucien. (IMO)

Secondly, if there’s one thing for certain with SJM it is that nothing is certain with her.

Of course like any reader I am nervous for what might happen but looking at it textually speaking I do not think we have much to worry about... Not to mention that if we look at SJM past behaviour we can extrapolate several things.

When Sarah falls in love with a character she is very willing to shift all plans to accommodate them, we have a good example of this with Rowan, once she began writing him she fell in love with him and Chaol was quickly pushed aside. I am sure she has done plenty of interviews saying as much from memory.

SJM Live

- Azriel has a lot of shit going on that we’re going to be able to see in this book.

- Azriel’s song is Mr. Brightside for the vibes. Not necessarily the lyrics. SJM is kinda obsessed with him and telling his story in the future.

- We’re getting to see more of Azriel’s cheeky humor in this one.

 - SJM can’t wait to see theories after everyone reads Azriel’s pov. There’s a lot of crumbs that have been scattered around for his journey.      [ref]

It is safe to say that in her own words Sarah is obsessed with Azriel, which gives us a good idea about who she wants to write about next. This is the same vibe we got off her when she was introducing Rowan to the TOG universe and I think it is a pretty easy assumption to believe the next book is Elain’s too.

Not to mention SJM is not afraid to shake it up and swap out the LI you think it will be, Chaol/Rowan & Tamlin/Rhysand. It is not far fetched to think she would do the same with Elain and Lucien. Not to mention the idea of such a repetitive story ARC like Mates (after Feysand and Nessian) could easily be avoided by doing something like a rejected-bond or second bond.  

I really could not tell you what I think Azriel’s ARC/what he is dealing with is because we have so little information on him all I know is I cannot wait to read it all. He is easily one of my favourite characters, he is so mysterious to us. 

I think Elain’s ARC is going to be all about choice. And we know from SJM that you can have more than one mate.

Elain said, her voice breaking. “It means nothing. I don’t care who decided it or why they did—”“You belong to him.”“I belong to no one. But my heart belongs to you.”

“to my sister and the shadowsinger in the garden—“that is what she needs? Is there no free will? What if Lucien wishes the union but she doesn’t?”

As far as I am concerned if you look at all SJM couples from all her books there is always that initial Spark™ and I think that impartially if you look at Elain and Lucien they have not had it at all (bar maybe the moment he scents the bond), Elain is completely disinterested in him. In the bond as a whole.

“if it wasn’t for Vassa.” A twitch of the lips, a spark in that russet eye. “She’s doing well enough. Savoring every second of her temporary freedom.”

Azriel mastered himself enough to say, “Thank you.” I’d never seen his hazel eyes so bright, the hues of green amid the brown and gray like veins of emerald.

See? SPARK, literally and figuratively.

You could even argue that she was you know, really struggling at the time the bond snapped in to place so it wasn’t the time for them but then we are given Azriel as a mirror to the situation and we see despite her troubles she is capable of interacting with someone without disinterest. Can and has been attracted too, can smile and laugh with someone despite being upset over Graysen.

Examples;

“You’re welcome to stay for the night,” I said, since Elain certainly wasn’t going to. Lucien lowered his hands into his lap and leaned back in the armchair. “Thank you, but I have other plans.” I prayed he didn’t catch the slightly relieved glimmer on Elain’s face.”

“Azriel smiled faintly. “Would you like me to show you the garden?” But Elain did not balk from him, did not shy away as she nodded—just once. Azriel, graceful as any courtier, offered her an arm.

“And do what?” “Spend time with her.” “I don’t think she’ll tolerate two minutes alone with me, so forget about two weeks.” His jaw worked as he studied the fire.”

Elain sat silently at one of the wrought-iron tables, a cup of tea before her. Azriel was sprawled on the chaise longue across the gray stones, sunning his wings and reading what looked to be a stack of reports—likely information on the Autumn Court that he planned to present to Rhys once he’d sorted through it all. Already dressed for the Hewn City—the brutal, beautiful armor so at odds with the lovely garden. And my sister sitting within it.

“You as well.” A sidelong glance toward Elain, swift and fleeting. “Both of you.” Elain said nothing, but at least she bowed her head in thanks.”

Azriel and Elain remained in the sitting room, my sister showing him the plans she’d sketched to expand the garden in the back of the town house, using the seeds and tools my family had given her tonight. Whether he cared about such things, I had no idea, but I sent him a silent prayer of thanks for his kindness before Rhys and I slipped upstairs.

“There were only a few presents left—Lucien’s. [...] I handed Elain the small box with her name on it. Her smile faded as she opened it. “Enchanted gloves,” she read from the card. “That won’t tear or become too sweaty while gardening.” She set aside the box without looking at it for longer than a moment. And I wondered if she preferred to have torn and sweaty hands, if the dirt and cuts were proof of her labor. Her joy.”

“He cares for you.” “He doesn’t know me.”

“You don’t give him the chance to even try to do so.” Her mouth tightened, the only sign of anger in her graceful countenance. “I don’t want a mate. I don’t want a male.” 

“You are his mate. Do you even know what that means?” “It means nothing,” Elain said, her voice breaking. “It means nothing. I don’t care who decided it or why they did—”“You belong to him.”“I belong to no one. But my heart belongs to you.”

Again like I said, textually when we look at it all together Sarah is not exactly planting the seeds for them at all, now of course there is still time for that to change, and of course we only have a limited perspective but as a reader it doesn’t come across positively. Even if you consider Nessian who have been against each other from the start have had the seeds planted, even as they argued they had tension and emotion.

Sarah has given Elucien so little of anything positive or negative comparitively, it is like the are barely registered. 

Not to mention she puts across Azriel as a candidate time and time again, and as a writer you would not do that for nothing.

“She doesn’t need anything,” Azriel answered without so much as looking at Lucien.

“You know them better than I do. But I will say that Lucien is loyal—fiercely so.” “So is Azriel.”

“Why not make them mates?” I mused. “Why Lucien?” “I’d keep that question from Lucien.” “I’m serious.” I turned toward him and crossed my arms. “What decides it? Who decides it?”

“What if”—I jerked my chin toward the window, to my sister and the shadowsinger in the garden—“that is what she needs? Is there no free will? What if Lucien wishes the union but she doesn’t?”

SJM is sowing doubt at every turn. Then to top it off we are introduced to Vassa through Lucien, and now we finally see him have a spark, blush, and speak of her with almost worship as Feyre points out.

“I …” Lucien fumbled for the words. Not out of some lie or excuse, I realized a moment later. Realized when he said, “I’ve been at the Spring Court every now and then. But if I’m not here in Velaris, I’ve mostly been staying with Jurian. And Vassa.”

“Not for long—not if Vassa has anything to do with it.” “You sound like an acolyte.”

Lucien blushed, glancing at Elain. “She’s got a foul temper and a fouler mouth.” 

Now, I can understand the belief that Elucien could be endgame but you simply cannot deny that before that Elriel & LucienxVassa is going to have to be explored to a degree. 

“Az ran a hand through his dark hair. “Are we …”Unusual for him to stumble with words. “Are we supposed to get the sisters presents?”

“I …” Lucien fumbled for the words. Not out of some lie or excuse, I realized a moment later. Realized when he said, “I’ve been at the Spring Court every now and then. But if I’m not here in Velaris, I’ve mostly been staying with Jurian. And Vassa.”

We also see both couples paralleled. I mean in all honesty I could go on and on and on, there is so many qoutes that I could add but this will just get longer and longer. I am going to link my full Elriel Analysis, and some other stuff about them and rejecting the bond below.

As for our fox boy Lucien!

I really like him, and I do feel like he has a very interesting journey ahead, between his true paternity, Vassa and the mating bond he has a lot coming up for him. I am excited to see where the band of exhiles might take us, despite Feyre’s mockery I am excited that after so long of not belonging anywhere he may have found people to call his own.

Look if Elucien happens after a genuine build up, I will be happy to read their journey, of course I will be very disappointed for Elriel because I truly believe they are the best fit but I am not against Elucien if anything I think Sarah is, more than anyone else.

Like I said I could go on for years, and honestly in 9 days hopefully we have a better idea of the future to base our opinions on. 

I am tagging this Anti-Elucien, not that I feel it is but I don’t want Elucien shippers to have to see it, so if they blacklist the tag the can avoid the negativity ❤︎

[Elriel Meta] [Elriel Kindred Spirits] [Elriel Choice 1 & 2] [Garden] [Thoughts]

[tlbodine]

The Great Content Warning Debate

Horror Twitter has been aflame for a few days now with heated discourse about trigger/content warnings, and I keep seeing the same arguments and questions and points come up repeatedly so I wanted to collect all of it into one place because I feel like discourse can only get so far if people keep reinventing the wheel -- so perhaps having the full discussion laid out in one place could be helpful.

Of course, the folks arguing probably won’t see this post, but perhaps there can be some benefit from talking about it anyway. This is intended to be more of an overview of arguments and counter-arguments, collected and displayed as impartially as possible, but of course my own opinions are going to leak in and color some of this. 

NOTE: This is written specifically from the perspective of the horror book community, a genre that traditionally is associated with troubling, transgressive, risk-taking and shocking works. There are discussions to be had for content labels on other types of fiction, but as I’m unfamiliar with the norms and expectations of, say, romance, I’m not going to wade too deeply into that here. 

So without further ado, the arguments and counter-arguments and discussion points that I keep seeing hashed and rehashed and circled around when the issue of trigger warnings comes up! 

If you’re sensitive, you shouldn’t be reading horror 

“Horror is supposed to be horrifying! It’s not fluffy bunnies and kittens! You’re supposed to be made uncomfortable!” 

There are a few problems with this: 

“Uncomfortable” is not the same as “Sent into a panic attack/flashback/relapse” (ie, triggered) 

People with PTSD and other issues can and do engage with horror all the time and often love the genre for entertainment or therapeutic purposes

Many people are fine with some types of content but not others; blood and guts won’t affect them the same as rape, or they’re fine with adults dying but can’t handle child death, and so on and so forth 

Knowing what you’re getting into can help you prepare/brace yourself so you’re not taken unaware; people with the right warnings can mentally prepare themselves and enjoy a book that they would not have been able to read if they were confronted with it unexpectedly

Trigger warnings are censorship 

Some folks have an implicit/kneejerk reaction that “trigger = bad thing” and respond to the request to put warnings on a book as a moral value judgment on the book’s contents. I can see why they might fear that, especially because at a glance it’s easy to conflate the groups asking for warnings with the groups who say things like “if your characters have underage sex then you the writer are literally a pedophile.” But by and large the folks asking for warnings do not seem to be asking for folks to stop writing certain difficult themes, only to provide a heads up for readers about the type of experience those readers can expect from the book. 

There is an argument to be made that warnings could affect the sales of a book, in much the same way that an NC-17 film doesn’t get the same distribution opportunities as an R-rated or PG-13 film, and that authors/publishers will make marketing decisions to include or exclude certain types of content in order to avoid this. 

Trigger warnings will spoil the book 

While some readers will benefit from content warnings, others might have their reading experience ruined by knowing about major twists. This seems especially relevant with a warning like “child death.” It’s very important that people who have, for example, recently lost a child not be unexpectedly re-traumatized by reading about a child dying without warning. But it’s also important that people who want to enjoy the full, shocking impact of such a scene have the opportunity to do so without having it dulled by forewarning. 

Any kind of warning system needs to be opt-in for a reader. Some suggestions include: 

Placing warnings at the end of a book, where readers can flip to that page to look (not helpful if you’re ordering online) 

Placing warnings on the author’s website, where readers can search (not helpful if you’re buying in person)

Given the limitations, a combination of those strategies seems to make sense. It may also be unfortunately true that someone looking for one type of warning (ie, rape) will have their experience ruined if they spoiler themselves for another warning (child death). This may be unavoidable collateral damage. 

Authors/Publishers should be responsible for putting warnings in their books

There seems to be some debate over whether the onus of responsibility for providing warnings rests on the author or the publisher. It should be acknowledged that authors may not always have the power to make this choice -- and if the presence or absence of warnings becomes a factor for judging the quality/moral fiber of authors, those authors could be punished by the reader community for a choice that was largely out of their hands (although, there’s still nothing keeping the author from hosting those warnings externally - how successfully that is implemented is another matter). 

Additionally, the demand for warnings will be placed more consistently on small presses simply because those presses are more likely to heed the request. This could create a double standard where readers might be more forgiving of large pub works that forego warnings because there’s no expectation that they would have implemented them anyway. On the other hand, this could be a way for indie publishers to differentiate themselves on the market and appeal more to certain subsets of readers. 

External groups or communities should be responsible for warnings

There’s a line of reasoning that an author or publisher may not be sensitive to the potentially triggering/damaging things in their work, and some kind of external governing body should manage this work instead. This does sound a lot more like the censorship argument that people are worried about. 

Wiki-style sites and places where people can freely tag books (such as Storygraph) also fit this bill to an extent. They would presumably have less power over the market than a ratings board like the MPAA, but could still exert influence over how a book is received. 

Demanding warnings will negatively impact marginalized authors 

We’re already seeing some evidence that BIPOC and LGBTQ authors are affected more by user-generated trigger warnings on sites like Storygraph, and that these warnings can be weaponized against marginalized authors. Much like review-bombing a book before it comes out can affect its launch, labeling a book with inaccurate trigger warnings could damage its sales. 

Similarly, lists of “safe” and “unsafe” authors have already begun to circulate among some groups, and there seems to be a disproportionate number of marginalized creators on that “unsafe” list -- at least according to the anecdotal reports I’ve seen. 

Historically, it is true that any attempts at censorship or content moderation will be more harshly applied to marginalized groups (see: film ratings for gay sex vs straight sex). 

It’s impossible to warn for everything

One hesitancy that some authors have with tagging their work is they’re not sure what to tag for. Triggers are highly personal, and there’s no way you can possibly guess what might upset a reader. 

Here’s a list of commonly agreed-upon things that might make sense to tag for in a given work: 

Violence/gore 

Suicide/self-harm

Rape/sexual assault

Domestic violence

Child death/endangerment

Animal death/abuse

Drug use/substance abuse 

Racism/slurs 

That said, it’s still difficult to account for context. At what stage do you warn for something? If a character is drinking a beer, do you need to tag for that? Do you distinguish between the tone things are written in, such as being played for laughs vs seriously? If the rape scene is written artistically/metaphorically, does the same warning apply as if it were described act-by-act in a clinical sense? What if your blanket list of warnings gives readers a false sense of what the book will be like -- is it actually helpful at all, or is it just posturing/virtue signaling to include warnings that won’t actually be effective?  

Some would argue that this is dramatically overthinking it, but this does seem to cause a great deal of distress to authors who want to do the right thing but worry about getting it wrong. An argument could be made that trying and failing might be worse than doing nothing, especially if your attempts get you labeled as a “trustworthy” or “safe” author only for that trust to be “betrayed” by a warning you used incorrectly. 

On the other hand, many would argue that we all “pretty much know” what needs to be warned for, and that warnings are intuitive. These granular questions could be viewed as a distraction from more common sense issues. 

Readers are responsible for managing their own safety

Ultimately, because it’s impossible for every potential trigger to be identified and warned for, readers will need to remain vigilant. Of course, there are already ways to identify the content of a book without any kind of established warning system -- such as, for example, reading posted book reviews, asking a question on a book’s Goodreads page, reaching out to the author directly, asking about the book in a reading group online or having a friend/parent/spouse/trusted person read the book first and report back with their findings. 

This is the system we’ve pretty much used as readers for years, before “trigger warning” became part of the common vernacular, and it does have some distinct advantages just because you can get a lot more specific information this way. 

It is possible that if warnings become more commonplace for books that readers may become less vigilant about their own safety, which could paradoxically put them at greater risk of finding troubling content unexpectedly. 

There’s also the issue of “safe” and “unsafe” author lists. At the moment, while the discourse is hot, it’s perhaps more natural to pick sides and disregard some authors for reasons that may be unfair -- for example, marking an author as unsafe or boycotting her work because she doesn’t want to include warnings, but she wants to avoid warnings because she strongly believes they will be detrimental to a reader’s safety. A reader may or may not agree with that perspective, but it’s certainly not the same motive as an author who would do something actively malicious to a reader (like, idk, emailing a screamer to a reviewer or something. that’s a made up example.) 

In the end, trigger warnings are a good idea, but the issue is complex to implement and some people do still have reservations about their overall efficacy. 

We simply won’t know one way or another until we try to implement it. But in the meantime, I do think it’s valuable to continue talking about this, as long as everyone involved remains civil and engages in good faith. Once people’s perspectives start getting thrown out the window in the heat of the moment, or strawmen arguments are erected that don’t reflect what anyone involved actually believes, the discussion ceases to be helpful. 

[kaishun]

Fanexus - Upcoming Fandom-focused Platform

Hey y’all, Kaishun here, who hasn’t spoken in 85 years but still vaguely lurks around in the corners of your peripherals. As you guys probably know, with the tumblr ban on NSFW (both for things that actually were NSFW and vaguely fleshy colored), a lot of big folks in the fandom left for twitter. Well, twitter sucks, as it’s impossible to finding anything. Nobody tags stuff, because there’s not enough space to do so, and harassment’s pretty bad (both due to lack of tagging and due to tagging).

Fanexus is a platform wanting to change that! It’s kinda’ve the love child between tumblr and livejournal, and with the beta coming up soon, they’re trying to drum up some hype. I’m hype, so, I’m gonna go over some of my fav official features so far:

Proship / Anti-Harassment / Anti-Censorship

Useful Tagging System ( #Saix = #Saïx )

3 Accounts in 1 (1 login for 3 different blogs)

Details on^ below the cut. Here’s a pretty picture from their blog @fanexus-dot-net​ to show its progress:

Proship, Harassment, and Censorship (Don’t Like/Don’t Read)

A lot of platforms and people are aggressively censoring fictional content they don’t like. Whether that be two characters lewding in general, those character being in an abusive relationships, noncon, age gaps, underaged, incest, etc.-- a lot of people get harassed for drawing that kind of stuff. But, y’know-- it’s fictional. No different from the whole “video games cause violence” scare from moms in the 90s. But the harassment from people has gotten really bad, especially on twitter.

Fanexus allows whatever you want to draw/write/etc., as long as it is of fictional characters--with a great tagging system to support it. If you don’t like something... you block the tag! Bam, that simple. You shouldn’t see anymore.

For those of you who went to Pillowfort, and were displeased with the sudden rule change & bans regarding some content, Fanexus should have no such issue. They’re hosting in Denmark, where the country’s sex specialists determined that underaged content of fictional characters did not have a negative impact on actual children.

Useful Tagging System

idk about you, but I hate looking under the 10 different names for the same ship. Every other new artist seems to have another name for their fav pairing. Fanexus has a tagging system that support synonyms-- meaning “#XemSai”, “#Xemnas x Saix”, “#Xemnas/Saïx”, etc. will all show up under the same “#XemSai” search.

Its tagging is also hierarchical-- so if someone tags something with just “#XemSai”, it’ll show up under show up #Xemnas, #Saix, and #Kingdom Hearts. While this may come off as a bit scary at first (there’s such a “don’t put X in the main tag!” concern on tumblr), it normalizes letting your art/fics to be actually, like... seen. And if someone doesn’t like it #XemSai, they can just block the tag. This greatly decreases the chance of shy people with rarepairs just being lost to the abyss, never seen again. As someone who’s in some small fandoms, “forcing” everything to go into the series tag is a great feature to me.

It also lets people completely block series-- block the #Kingdom Hearts tag if you don’t want to see Melody of Memory spoilers. As long as they’ve tagged their posts with anything regarding the series, it’ll get caught up in that block filter, so you can safely play the game and still browse your feed.

Aliases (3 Accounts in 1)

With one account, you have three different “Alias” blogs. These generally function like completely different blogs (none of that sideblog shit); with their own posts, their own followers, their own following, and their own memberships to communities. You can switch between them with an easy click, instead of having to open a whole new browser or logout/login like on tumblr.

My plan is to have a SFW alias, a NSFW alias, and a RP alias. I can enjoy my SFW alias at work and on the go, as well as post some OCs to it; I can switch to my NSFW alias if I want to see some juicy smut on a lazy weekend; and to my RP alias to catch up on what’s been going on and write some replies.

Miscellaneous 

Communities: You ever think about making a blog exclusively for one character, but go “ugh sideblogs suck and I don’t want to do this by myself”? Well, Communities allow everyone who joins to share content to it, easily gathering art/fics from your favorite character or series in one place. It’s a great way to find people with similar interests, follow some new artists, etc. Roleplay-wise, theoretically great for “Worlds”; tossing an opener into the themed world and getting some replies.

Funding: They’re currently planning on no ads, and funding via premium features, such as buying extra aliases. There’ll be a Kickstarter later for server cost and additional features.

People/Fans: I’ve been on their discord for a few weeks, and holy shit, these are my people. I’ve never felt so comfortable just like... chatting about my interests with people. I’m not the #1 sinner in the server at all times, like I am everywhere else. Discussions I’ve normally seen blow up into huge raging disagreements kinda just simmer to slightly irritable but still civil conversations. It’s kinda bizarre to witness, like... mature people talking to mature people.

Minors: Minors will not be able to see posts marked as 18+, full stop. You can also mark your entire blog as 18+, but you’re not required to. Minors who lie about their age will have their accounts banned.

Interested?: Their beta is going to be starting sometime late this month. You can find more details on their tumblr blog ( https://fanexus-dot-net.tumblr.com/ ) or their twitter ( https://twitter.com/fanexus ). You can sign up for their forum/discord/beta over here: https://docs.google.com/forms/d/1-Ll_vb1bukbnxHpaQcuxUikUu1NtqDk3-AsD4gZkjiY/viewform?edit_requested=true 

[eagles-translated]

Analyzing the writing of Eagles

Here's a post I've been wanting to make for a while! I've expressed my thoughts on some of the storylines in previous posts, but I've never done a complete post on the writing of the whole show. I've divided this post into separate parts, focusing on each season and its plot points. Keep reading to see my analysis of the writing in Eagles! 👇 Word Count: 18k

If you've stumbled upon this post from the Young Royals or the Beartown tag (tagged them since I've drawn some parallels from those shows), here's a brief summary of what Eagles is, which you can watch with English subtitles here. This post contains Eagles spoilers from 1x01 - 3x10.

Eagles is a Swedish TV show that revolves around a few teenagers living in the Swedish ice hockey town Oskarshamn while experiencing friendship, love, and rivalry on the ice.

To start this off I would like to say that I have no experience with professional screenwriting and if anything, this is just a way for me to procrastinate on actually writing my own projects.

I love experiencing new stories and when I discover one I really like it's just natural for me to branch off with "what ifs" and to start wondering how the story would've turned out if some things were changed. Sometimes it's with a storyline improvement in mind, and other times it's just out of plain curiosity.

You might feel like this post is leaning towards the critical side, and I can definitely understand why since there are a lot of small details that I've picked apart from all seasons. I added a section for each season with things that I thought were really well done so this post wouldn't be too negative.

I actually did enjoy all seasons and I feel like the quality of not just the writing but every single thing has steadily increased each year.

Season 1: Tropes and clichés

Eagles premiered its first season in 2019 and was, despite many negative reviews, a big success among its target audience. Every episode on SVT Play amassed around 700 000–800 000 views and there didn't seem to be any doubt that the show would get renewed.

What the critics had issues with were that "Eagles rarely takes the unexpected path, and feels like a slightly soulless product of studied target group thinking a little too often," (Karolina Fjellborg in Aftonbladet) and "In Eagles, the characters seem to be locked in the role of a "teenager" but the humanity is missing. They've simplified the construction of the character," (Django Lorentzson in MovieZine).

Eagles was unfortunate enough to constantly be compared to SKAM in its infancy, and that's a tough comparison to live up to. SVT sort of shot themselves in the foot as they were the ones who contributed to it. While the show was still in the casting process, SVT wrote an article hyping the show up as a Swedish SKAM (which has since been edited, but led many to falsely believe that it would involve all the familiar SKAM characters with some hockey elements sprinkled in).

So, why exactly did critics think the first three episodes of the show were predictable and soulless? Well, it's pretty simple. They'd seen it all before. The setting, the characters, the storylines—just in different TV shows and movies.

Season 1 for me is nostalgic and very enjoyable despite its clichéd nature. I also felt like I'd seen the show before due to its generic storylines, but there is a reason why tropes are tropes and why clichés are clichés. It's because they're tried and true, and actually somewhat good writing tools as long as you expand on them. The keyword here is to expand—a story doesn't magically become good simply because you mimic something another writer has done. Tropes are fine to use but you can't just apply them and stop there. Everything in a story needs to be developed in order to be good.

It's safe to say that it's pretty much impossible to write a story without any tropes that have been used before. Striving to avoid clichés at all costs in hopes of making your story as original as possible is harder than it sounds, and almost impossible to boot. Here's a great piece of advice for aspiring writers written by a user on Carvezine:

[...] if you look down at your story and are worried it’s already been told before – don’t spend another second thinking about it. It has. A million times. The only difference is that it hasn’t been told by you. Accept that regurgitation is part of writing, and just do your best not to regurgitate the same way as the guy next to you. We’d all do well to acknowledge there is at least a portion of our stories that are really someone else’s. [...] Beyond that, write with the motivation that if you don’t get around to telling your story, eventually somebody else will.

Even the greatest books have storylines with some clichés. And that's not really a bad thing, either. Think about it. How many times have you decided to binge a TV show solely because it reminded you of another series? Or picked up a book simply because you love a good enemies to lovers romance, a battle between good and evil fantasy, or whatever it might be?

I found this article from Masterclass that perfectly describes what tropes are and why they're used. It's written from the perspective of novel writing but it is still applicable.

A trope in literary terms is a plot device or character attribute that is used so commonly in the genre that it’s seen as commonplace or conventional. For example, a trope in superhero stories is a villain who wants to take over the world. Tropes are popular for a reason—if something has been written about over and over again, there’s a good chance that it’s something readers enjoy reading! Tropes can be helpful, but a novel made up only of tropes will quickly start to feel stale and predictable to readers. That’s why you need to read up on tropes—and then innovate. Deliberately taking a favorite trope and turning it on its head is a great way to put your own unique spin on the genre and keep your readers interested.

Eagles, in its first season, didn't really do a lot of expanding upon the tropes they used and it's understandable that they were still trying to find their footing. I can also imagine it's difficult to do so when you only have eight 20 minute episodes in the season.

However... There definitely should've been more work put into these characters to make them their own. It's tricky, yes, but still achievable if you don't abandon them in their cookie-cutter form and try to actually decorate them with something unique and fresh.

So, how did they write their characters?

Felicia's character and backstory

To start off, Felicia is a famous influencer known for starring in a reality show next to her former NHL professional father. There's already a clear disconnect because it's hard to relate to a character with such a public past and large following. But it is 100% possible if you let the viewer know the character has humane qualities just like the person watching the show.

Look at Wilhelm from Netflix's Young Royals, another Swedish TV show. Wilhelm is the prince of Sweden, set to attend a prestigious elite boarding school, and is the heir to the throne. That doesn't exactly sound like a relatable scenario, does it? And yet the writers make it work because when we're introduced to Wilhelm we realize he's just like everybody else. He wants a normal life, he latches on to his older brother for support, he has anxiety, and he struggles between following his heart versus doing what his family is expecting him to do. A lot of these factors are relatable among the audience.

So, let's look at Felicia Kroon. She is in many ways portrayed as the main character of the show. Eagles starts off with her family having moved to Oskarshamn and the following episodes focus on her developing relationship with Ludde as well as her traumatic past. There's almost too much focus on Felicia here, and I'll get back to that.

Comparing Felicia to Wilhelm from Young Royals, they're both well-known teenagers with famous parents. Of course they have different circumstances considering Felicia is Instagram popular and Wilhelm is a blood royal, but in the grand scheme of things they're similar. Felicia is even referred to as a "Kroon princess" because of her last name Kroon bearing a resemblance to the Swedish word kronprinsessa, meaning crown princess.

The students of their respective schools treat their attendance as a big deal when they first arrive and then Wilhelm and Felicia start spending time with the "popular" crowd despite not really fitting in there.

I personally found it easy to relate to Wilhelm but difficult to relate to Felicia. Some people may feel differently, but her character is basically a popular party girl who attracts the attention of one of the school's star players and is "welcomed" by the popular crowd on her first day of school. I put welcome in quotation marks because Klara, the leader of the girl group, isn't exactly the most welcoming person but she does welcome Felicia to the school. My point is, Felicia doesn't have a lot of relatable traits in the first episodes.

Felicia then goes on a date with the guy she's met, Ludde. Okay, so there haven't been that many layers to her character yet. We're at the third episode and so far she's been kind of flat.

Near the end of the third episode, we get some depth to the character and we hear her back story.

Felicia: [...] We don’t have a good relationship, my dad and I. And that’s probably why we moved from the beginning, because he’s an idiot. We’ve never been close, but… Elias and he have been since they’ve had hockey. [...] And mom has been really involved, so… And I… They’ve never really cared about me. And… And I haven’t really been a problem either. I’ve had good grades, good friends, and… I don’t know why I’m telling you this. I don’t talk about it to people. [...] I just felt so fucking lonely and invisible. I was worried all the time, couldn’t sleep, panicked because I couldn’t sleep… So I started going out more. It went overboard. It started affecting school, my grades slipped… I started taking things to be able to concentrate. Everybody does stuff like that. And then I still couldn’t sleep, so… I started mixing with sleeping pills. And there’s always wine and booze at our place. I don’t want this to come out, that’s really important. Ludde: Of course, I’d never tell. Felicia: One night, something happened that made me… Act out of control more than usual. I woke up the next morning in the hospital. So they sent me to rehab. It was really rough for mom and dad that I was suddenly in focus. When I woke up, dad wasn’t even there. Ludde: What made you take too much that night? Felicia: I’d forgotten my phone at home, so I ran up and got it while my friends were waiting in an Uber. Then I came into the hall and I heard noises. You know, like, when somebody is doing it. Ludde: Okay. Felicia: And I thought it was really weird because mom wasn’t home. So I went into the living room… Dad was fucking my mom’s best friend. On the rug below the couch.

This gives Felicia more layers and does separate her from every other "popular pretty party girl" trope that you see on TV. But this is a huge info dump, and that's a problem. I would've liked to see this happen on-screen instead of only being told what went down. The golden rule of Show don't tell, as people like to say.

Show, don’t tell is a writing technique in which story and characters are related through sensory details and actions rather than exposition. It fosters a style of writing that’s more immersive for the reader, allowing them to “be in the room” with the characters. In his most commonly repeated quote, Chekhov said, “Don’t tell me the moon is shining. Show me the glint of light on broken glass."

This back story could've been more impactful that way if, perhaps, the show began with Felicia in a hospital bed with a strong headache and hazy flashbacks of that night where she saw her dad sleeping with another woman. Then we're introduced to her mother and brother sitting next to the hospital bed tired and worried, and Felicia notices her dad isn't present. They tell her Felicia is being sent to rehab and then there's a time-jump before we see the Kroon family having moved to Oskarshamn.

That's just an idea I threw together at the top of my head, but you get my point. It would've been more interesting if we knew from the beginning that Felicia had a traumatic past like this, leading the viewer to want to know more about what actually happened.

We did get a brief flashback at the very beginning of the show—we see Felicia partying with her friends and taking some pill before lying unconscious on the ground. There's also a glimpse of Ludde's car accident with Andreas yelling at him to get out of there.

That segment only lasts for around 45 seconds and it's easily forgettable upon your first viewing of the show. It's also hard to even recognize Felicia in the dark nightclub setting with the flashing lights. Some dialogue in that short scene could've made it more memorable, because I found that when I first watched season 1 I remembered Andreas yelling at Ludde despite that being drowned out by the music.

Ludde's backstory was way more well-done, in my opinion. We see him having crashed the car and bleeding from his head. He looks terrified and almost frozen by fear, needing to be pulled out of the car by a panicked Andreas yelling at him to bring Ludde back to the reality of the situation. We see Andreas yelling and pointing, telling Ludde he needs to run now. It's more powerful when we get to see it.

And in episode 8, when we learn the truth of what happened, it's not a long and dragged-out monologue. It fits into what's going on in the story. Felicia and Ludde have known each other for a few months now and are much closer than they were on their first date. They've had disagreements and fights, but at this moment they're in a good place.

And it feels like the right moment for Ludde to come clean about what happened to him.

Ludde: Hey… There’s something I’ve been meaning to tell you. Felicia: What? Ludde: About… My brother. It’s not really as everybody thinks. Felicia: What do you mean? Ludde: That night when he crashed… It wasn’t Andreas who drove the car. We were on our way home from one of his buddies. We’d had some fun drinking. And then… I’d just started learning how to drive. So I nagged and nagged at him. Felicia: So you were the one driving? But he’s an adult- Ludde: He was drunk as hell. He was going to leave the car, but I thought it was so cold and it was only three blocks away so I thought that I could drive. Felicia: And what happened? Ludde: It was slippery and really dark… And a car came. I hit the brakes in time, but it… Yeah. Right after he pushed me out of the car and yelled that I should run home straight away. He really didn’t want me to get into trouble. So, yeah… It was fucking bad luck. I want to just gather everybody and scream that it was me. Felicia: Hey… I love you. Ludde: I love you too. I love you so fucking much.

As Ludde is telling Felicia what happened as the other car came, we see a silent flashback of it along with Ludde's voice narrating. We see Andreas pulling him out of the car and yelling. Cutting to this scene that we've already seen in the beginning but might've forgotten about is a smart choice and makes the story Ludde is telling more real. We see it unfolding as Ludde is telling this to Felicia. It's a powerful scene.

We then see Felicia hugging Ludde from behind, a sign of support with no words needed. She tells him she loves him and Ludde says it back. It's an honest and sweet moment that comes at a perfect time in the story. It's not too early like Felicia's backstory was.

I sort of understand why Felicia's backstory was info-dumped because it was right before the drama of Mats accidentally spilling the beans to Klara's family. They wanted the audience to know what happened to her early, so they could move on to the plot point of Felicia thinking Ludde was the one who told everybody.

But we don't need every single detail of Felicia's story. Let it come organically. The only thing that was really needed was for Ludde to know that Felicia had struggled with drug use and was sent to rehab for this storyline to work. The reason why could've been saved for later, and it would've made for a more interesting reveal. Maybe just have Felicia allude to seeing something that night, but don't tell the viewers right away what it was.

In 1x06, Felicia is incredibly upset when she hears that her dad was the one who told Klara's family what happened to Felicia in the US. And rightly so.

Felicia: Don’t you get it? You ruined everything! Mats: What? Felicia: You told the whole damn town about me! About the US! Mats: I really didn’t mean to disclose you- Or disclose us. Sorry. Hey, sorry. Flisan, please. Hey. Felicia: Did you tell them you fucked mom’s best friend too? Yes, I saw you.

If this had been the moment where we first find out what Felicia saw, it would've been more surprising. Our reaction would've mirrored Mats's, and it would've been more heart-wrenching to know that Felicia was traumatized by an affair her dad had only to be cheated on herself in the very same episode.

Ludde's problematic nature

One of the scriptwriters of Eagles, Fanny Ekstrand, was interviewed in the behind-the-scenes documentary Edvins Skådisdrömmar. In this interview, she states:

Ludvig, he's the one who's been the easiest to retain the personality of. Because he's so... He's calm and friendly, but he makes dumb decisions. Ludvig isn't a typical hockey guy. He has a bunch of other qualities—music being one of them.

I found myself slightly disagreeing with this take, despite knowing Ekstrand is literally a part of the writing team and most likely helped shaped Ludde's personality. I just interpreted Ludde's character (at least in season 1) differently.

I also didn't find him that much different from any other typical hockey guy just because he happens to have another interest. That's a bit like saying Archie Andrews from The CW's Riverdale isn't a stereotypical jock because he also plays the guitar.

In season 1, we see Ludde break into the rink because he wanted to test out the ice. He just loves hockey that much. He also uses it as a way to express frustration and anger, which we saw in 1x05. He flirts with the new girl in school and in the beginning he even uses it as a tactic to gain a position on the main hockey team. This was confirmed by the creator Stefan H. Lindén in his Q&A, where he said:

My idea has always been that Ludde was blown away by Felicia and that he really likes her but that they both initially interacted and met to go swimming because Felicia knew it would piss her dad off and Ludde knew that it might throw Elias off since they were competing for the same position in the team.

I would say that the characteristics of a typical hockey guy would be someone like Adam—obsessed with the sport, flirting with girls, going to parties, and just spending a lot of time in the rink. Ludde checks off all of these points. However, I will give this the benefit of the doubt since season 2 Ludde seems to change a lot and it's easier to interpret him as the calm and friendly guy he was supposed to be in season 1.

So to me, Ludde wasn't calm and friendly at all. In season 2, yes, but when we're first introduced to him?

Ludde shows anger issues and violent tendencies in 1x05 when he head-butts Elias and breaks his nose. It's violent and messy. He then yells at Felicia to leave when she's trying to communicate with him and belittles her drug problems solely because she's rich. To me, Ludde wasn't a nice person in 1x04 either when he let his friends make suggestive comments about Felicia and what she was like in bed.

Omar: I can tell you one thing - you’re not borrowing my towel today cause I don’t know where that dick has been. Adam: It’s nice when she sucks, right? Omar: Can’t you tell us some more, does she bite you or is it just really, really nice? [...] Adam: Is that what you sound like when you’re coming? What does she sound like?

This was described as "locker room talk" and the writers probably wanted to show an authentic view of what being a hockey player is like. I understand that. But it's a little problematic when it's later swept under the rug and treated like something that we're just supposed to accept.

Elias: [...] it’s not very fun to sit in a hockey locker room where people are talking about how nice it is to fuck my sister. Felicia: Ludde would never say anything like that, you know that. Elias: He wouldn’t? It’s a locker room, Felicia. That’s the only thing they talk about.

It did not sit right with me how Felicia seemed to be the one Elias blamed in this scene, and Ludde and his friends never faced any real consequences for what they said. Elias did lash out at Ludde, but there was no severe consequence for Omar and Adam's comments.

Compare this scenario to another Swedish show, Beartown on HBO. Beartown is similar to Eagles and focuses on a hockey team in a small town with one of the star players hooking up with a girl who's recently moved to their small town.

This girl is raped by the hockey player. And because of his status as the star of the team, he has almost the whole school behind him. The girl however is labeled as a lying slut. It's unfair and frustrating to see it happen, but it's authentic and done in a way that doesn't glamorize the ugly side of hockey culture.

Eagles is not as dark as Beartown so this comparison might be a little unfair. Beartown's whole storyline did revolve around this incident while in Eagles the hockey culture is treated more as a side thought. It's like they decided to throw in a taste of what goes on in a locker room just to create drama without really addressing it further.

Beartown did a much better job of portraying the problematic and toxic elements of hockey culture without making it seem like it's just something normal that we should accept. It was honest and raw. If you haven't seen the show, this short video does a great job of depicting how much thought was put into the toxic hockey culture, winning mentality, and subsequently hockey players thinking they're entitled to do whatever they want.

So, to respond to Ekstrand's quote from Edvins Skådisdrömmar—I did not experience Ludde as a "good guy" who only makes dumb decisions at all. In season 1, he's a bad person for letting his friends sexualize a girl he likes and letting her brother hear their disgusting comments. He's a bad person for fighting with her brother and later yelling at her, saying her drug issues are insignificant despite acting supportive of her only two episodes earlier.

I don't mind conflicts like these because they drive the story forward. I didn't particularly like Ludde in season 1 because of the reasons I just stated, but they're necessary to create drama and make the show interesting.

It's just weird to me how one of the writers is saying that Ludde is a calm person and a good guy when that is not at all how I interpreted his character.

Eagles is a show targeted towards a young audience, among them probably a lot of easily influenced pre-teens. What kind of message does this send to them when the guy letting his friends sexualize a girl he's slept with and on top of that laughing at their inappropriate comments is referred to as the good guy?

Klara is mean... What else?

From the moment we're introduced to Klara, it seems obvious that she'll play a living and breathing version of the infamous Alpha Bitch trope. She's also a prime example of the basic Popular is Evil trope and has her own Girl Posse consisting of Sara and Amie.

Klara feels threatened by the arrival of a potential new popular girl, Felicia, and does everything in her power to bully Felicia to show dominance. She barely shows any good sides of herself.

The only instance I can think of where we sort of see season 1 Klara in a positive light is when she talks to Amie in 1x05 about their friendship and then accompanies Amie to her audition for the school band.

Klara: Ever since Felicia started at school… It’s felt like you only hang out with her and that you’ve forgotten about me. She like took you from me. Amie: But I haven’t forgotten you. Klara: No, but do you get what I mean? Amie: I get it, but I haven’t forgotten you. Klara: No, I know. Amie: I know, but it just turned out that way when school started. Klara: Okay. Amie: But I’m sorry. Klara: It’s fine. Amie: Are you sure? Klara: Yeah. You can make it up to me when you go on your world tour.

Klara is really supportive of Amie's musical endeavors, but she also uses her support as a way to alienate Felicia from the girl group. It's very on the nose and kind of feels suffocating in the way it's written.

Klara: Amie, did you remove the clips? Amie: Yeah, she said they weren’t good. Klara: She’s just jealous. It’s so obvious. I mean, I’m jealous. You sing absolutely amazing. I don’t know, I just think it was really rude of her to sit in the cafeteria and criticize you like that Amie: Yeah, maybe. But she apologized. Klara: But still. That clip of you in the bathroom… Like… Sorry, but I’d be so mad if someone had posted something like that of me. I mean, you were standing there without makeup, completely non-fixed up. And the whole thing with her filming you without you knowing. That’s really weird. You don’t do that. Don’t you think so?

I'm sure there are plenty of people who act like this in real life. And maybe that's part of the problem, because Klara in season 1 really isn't an interesting character. We've met this person before and we know exactly what she's like. There's nothing new to discover. So season 1 is essentially just Klara being petty and rude every chance she gets, and to me it felt like a large part of her character was written just to stir up drama.

In 1x06, we see Klara backstab Amie by filming her making out with Ludde at her Halloween party. But I thought it was established in 1x05 that Klara feels like Amie was taken from her? And if Klara actually cared about Amie and didn't want to lose her as a friend, she wouldn't just stand by and watch with her phone recording the whole thing. It doesn't make a lot of sense.

Klara even made that whole point about how it was really weird of Felicia to film Amie without her knowing. So why would Klara do it, when she expressed that's weird and not something a normal person does? Is that supposed to be foreshadowing? Because if so, that's a clear contradiction and not how foreshadowing works.

When Sara happens to see the video on Klara's phone she immediately says that Klara should delete it.

Sara: What is that? Did they know you were filming? Klara: No, of course they didn’t know. Sara: Oh my god, Klara. You should probably delete it. Klara: I’m going to! But it’s crazy, right? Sara: Yeah, god. But seriously, delete it. Klara: I’m going to.

So Klara says she's going to delete the video. But it's still unclear why it was filmed in the first place if Klara insists that she's going to delete it. It's not like she filmed it just to show it to Sara either, since Sara wasn't meant to see it and only saw it by chance while swiping through Klara's photos on her phone.

It doesn't make sense for Klara to film a video like that of her best friend that she's supposed to care about. It doesn't make sense for Klara to film a video of anybody without their knowledge when she previously made a big deal about how you shouldn't do that.

What Klara's character is, is a bad attempt at the classical mean girl. She's clichéd, boring, and full of tropes.

Even her eventual character development is riddled with tropes like the Heel Realization where a character realizes they're actually one of the bad guys. This realization seems to come in 1x08, where Felicia calls Klara out on her behavior.

Felicia: You know what, Klara. I’m so fucking tired of your fucking comments. You didn’t get to be Lucia this year. Poor you! Was dad unable to fix that? Cry then, Klara. Cry. You’re so fucking mean. Everybody here is tired- Everybody here is scared of you. Even those who liked you once, they can’t take it anymore. Klara: That’s not true. It’s not true. Felicia: Yes, everybody is scared of you. You know what? Look around. Show people some fucking respect. Klara: Well say something, Amie! Amie: What is there to say? She’s right.

Klara needed a wake-up call like this. It's just unfortunate that she goes back to her mean girl behavior and posts the video after Amie insinuated that Klara wasn't a real friend. Klara already knew that Amie felt that way since she said Felicia was right in her assessment of everybody being scared and tired of Klara. So wouldn't it have made more sense for Klara to post the video right after that moment instead of during Amie's performance?

Or rather, why not pull a Subverted Trope and not have Klara post the video at all after she realized how horrible she'd been acting? That would've made me respect her so much more and be a great introduction to her character development in season 2.

The Halloween Incident

To me, the whole Halloween episode was questionable. First off, we never got actual confirmation of what happened in that room between Amie and Ludde. Some viewers insist that they only made out and others believe they went all the way. Here's what the creator of the show, Stefan H. Lindén, had to say about this in a Q&A post he did:

I think if you went into the writers room of Eagles and asked all of us what really happened in that room [between Ludde and Amie at Klara's Halloween party] we would all have different answers.  I know what happened, but I’m not sure we will ever truly know for sure, unless Ludvig or Amie eventually are open enough to admit to anyone what really happened.

This is kind of a vague answer, but that's fair considering that when Stefan did this Q&A the latest episode that had been released was 2x05 and he probably didn't want to spoil anything. However, looking back at this answer knowing how the season turned out I still feel like it's unclear what happened. It's also strange that Stefan seems to be saying that they never actually decided what happened between them since the writers "would all have different answers".

1x06 was just an odd episode for me overall. Lots of things felt rushed and underdeveloped. Let's not forget that this episode also contained, in my opinion, some of the weirdest lines in the whole show (along with Elias's strange monologue about plague vampires).

Ludde: Hey, I only have like 3%. Do you have any power? Adam: Are you wondering if I have a power bank in my shorts? It’s coming-

Ludde: I like shellfish. (said to Amie, wearing a lobster costume)

Up until this episode, Ludde has shown zero interest and attraction towards Amie. We are basically told that Ludde only hooked up with Amie because he was so drunk that he practically had no idea what he was doing.

In 1x02, we see a drunk Amie try to kiss Tobbe and upon getting rejected she moves on to make out with Adam. She gets overly friendly when she's drunk so the fact that she makes out with Ludde later is... Weird, but not entirely out of the realms of possibility.

Ludde on the other hand is moping about Felicia all night. He regrets how he yelled at her at the end of 1x05 and it shows. He's trying to drown all his problems in alcohol and it seems to be working, because when it enters his system he seems to be on top of the world.

What I found kind of ambiguous in this incident was if Ludde even remembered what happened that night. He was drinking so much compared to Amie, who doesn't really need as much alcohol before she reaches her "overly friendly" state. I thought for sure that Ludde was oblivious to the situation when he woke up in his bed the next day and immediately messaged Felicia.

There are just so many questions to unpack here that were never answered. What prompted Amie and Ludde to go into that empty room? Why did Ludde come with her? Why didn't Adam seem to care about this, when he'd been sitting next to Ludde and taking care of him most of the night? And as I wrote before, why would Klara film this video of her best friend when she previously expressed that was a weird thing to do?

There's just too much in 1x06 left unanswered. The Amie/Ludde hook-up was a badly executed plot twist because there wasn't anything hinting that this would happen. It just came out of nowhere.

Unbalanced screentime and Elias's wasted potential

A large portion of season 1 was dedicated to Felicia. This was kind of a let-down for me since I thought more focus would be placed on Eagles as a hockey team (after all, that's what the show is named after). I also thought more attention would be on Elias since he's the talented star player who's supposed to live up to his father's legacy.

The show starts with a couple radio hosts hyping up how Elias Kroon, son of the legendary Mats Kroon, is going to join the Eagles hockey team.

Host #1: [...] It’s finally official. New center in the junior team - Elias Kroon, son to the legendary NHL-pro Mats Kroon, who has now chosen to move home from the US to his hometown where Elias will play in his father’s old club Oskarshamn Eagles. Host #2: This is so freaking cool. Who doesn’t want a Kroon on their team? Host #1: We hope that he’ll take a spot on the A-team.

But we don't learn a lot about who Elias actually is in the first episode. The attention is on Felicia and her interest in Ludde.

Elias is so discarded that he barely has anything to say in the first couple of scenes we see him in. Here are all his eight lines in 1x01, and I'm not even joking.

Elias: Yes. Elias: Shut up. Elias: Ow. Elias: It's fine. Elias: Really? Elias: Fucking hell. Elias: I'll stay here. Elias: No, it's fine.

In 1x02 he has even fewer lines. Three, to be exact, and all he says is that his injury is a sprain and that it's fine. Essentially just an echo of two of the lines he had in the previous episode. It's nothing new.

There's a way to have a character stand out when they don't have many lines, but Elias just fades into the background with every other extra. There's too much time spent on having other characters talk about Elias than us actually getting to know him. So when we do meet him, it's pretty underwhelming.

Compare Elias to his sister who gets so much more attention from the writers. I don't really understand why either, since I thought Elias was a much more interesting character than his influencer sister. Felicia's character only seems to revolve around a guy. I wonder how many times we've seen that before?

In 1x02 we see the Eagles hockey team play their first game, but Elias is unable to play and has to sit in the stands for what was supposed to be his debut match. Why? Because during a hockey practice session in 1x01, Adam rams his stick into Elias to purposely injure him. I mean, fair enough. Adam is trying to get Ludde on the main team since he and Elias are competing for the same position. The shot of Adam smiling after Elias sprains his wrist is a bit too on the nose, but whatever.

What this does is minimize Elias' presence in season 1 by a lot. We don't see the son of the legendary NHL professional play an actual game until 1x05, which is more than halfway into the season. It's kind of disappointing but I understand the injury is done to dramatize his situation.

Elias barely gets his own storylines in the first few episodes. He just has things done to him instead of acting on his own. When we do see him on screen he gets injured by Adam, reprimanded by his father, and later told he can't play in his debut game.

His sweet side (or any side of him, really) isn't shown until 1x03 when Amie wakes up at the Kroon house and Elias reassures her that they didn't do anything together and that she can borrow Felicia's clothes.

Elias doesn't really do much for the plot until he hears Ludde's friends objectify Felicia and he starts a fight with Ludde and confronts Felicia about it. That's when it feels like Elias is actually a part of this show instead of just being an extra shoved into the background. His actions are finally affecting the plot.

Elias's potential in season 1 was hugely wasted. The only episode where we actually got to see him shine was 1x07, when he travels to Karlskrona with Amie. We find out he doesn't want the hockey arrangement his dad has planned for him and that he's actually a pretty goofy guy who likes making jokes (and eating green candy).

If less time was spent with Felicia and the distribution of every episode's 20 minutes was more balanced, season 1 could've been massively improved. It got much better in season 2, but season 1 suffered and made many people think that Felicia was a basic and unentertaining character.

The side characters and their comic relief

So one thing that I found really disappointing with Felicia's amount of screentime is that we barely got enough time for the other main characters, let alone the side characters.

What I mean here is that the only people we really know on the Eagles hockey team are Ludde and Elias. Ludde's friends, Adam and Omar, just feel like comic relief sidekicks. We don't really know what they're like, besides the fact that they like to make jokes and mess around.

This issue is largely created by the short running time the episodes have along with season 1 only having eight episodes in total. That's definitely understandable. It did get better in season 3 where we see Ludde having a deeper conversation with Adam and Omar and they finally don't just feel like the comic relief characters, but actual people with layers.

Ludde: I’m going to quit hockey. Adam: Are you serious? Omar: What the hell are you saying? Ludde: It’s not the same anymore. I’m not passionate about it. I… Yes, it sucks, but… I’ve thought about it for a while now. Omar: We make jokes about it and all, but… Yeah. It wouldn’t be the same without you. Kingelikingen. Adam: I get that it’s a tough choice. But yeah… You’ll work things out. You and Felicia. You always do. Ludde: You guys are pretty awesome sometimes, actually.

This scene was really sweet, and I wish we could've had moments like this between the guys in season 1. Just one scene to show that they're not just the "typical hockey guys". It feels like Ludde was the only person on the team in season 1 who wasn't just a background character. Even Elias, who you would assume should be at the forefront, isn't properly developed until 1x05 where we see him defending his sister and starting a fight with Ludde. Otherwise, it very much felt like Elias was kept in the background.

There are also guys on the team called Herman, Simon, Näslund, Ekbäck, Hoffmann, Berglund (even Montell, which was a fun nod to the show's director)... But who are they, actually? Do you even remember their names? To be honest with you, I don't. Because they're just names—not actual characters.

None of the other guys on the team get any depth. They're just sort of there as extras and to give the audience a sense of comedy with their "hockey team shenanigans". This was illustrated in 1x08, where Adam and Omar make their teammate Liam do a "sexy dance" on a table because he lost his virginity. Or a more extreme example—Jönsson, who only exists to be the comic relief and the unlucky guy who just can't catch a break.

In 2x04, Jönsson is told by Jack to do extra time in the gym and gets told off when he only spends a few minutes on the exercise bike. Later, Jack also makes a joke about how he should get Jönsson a defibrillator. In 2x09 Jönsson invites Ludde, Adam, and Omar to come to his mom's place to hang out. After he's left, Adam makes a comment about how there's no way he's going to "rot" in Jönsson's apartment that doesn't even have a balcony.

Don't get me wrong, these scenes aren't bad and I don't mean they should've been scrapped. Comedy can absolutely have its place in a show like this. Let's take the scene where Ludde flashes a couple of unfortunate old ladies on his first date with Felicia as an example. It feels like something a teenage boy would do to try to make a girl he likes laugh. It's a brief scene and it's nice to see Ludde being able to goof off only moments after talking about Andreas. We know that's a touchy subject for him.

However, it feels slightly overdone sometimes with how almost everybody on the hockey team is only there for comedic purposes and to fill space. It's more refreshing when they're shown to be multi-dimensional. I wish this is something that the writers would've considered when the show is literally titled after the hockey team, yet most of the hockey players are hardly in the story.

To add to this, it felt like Sara and Tobbe completely disappeared from the story in season 2. With Sara we understand that she probably didn't want to hang out with Klara anymore after knowing she filmed the Halloween video and posted it on Instagram, so that's fair. But it would've been nice to see Tobbe stick around in season 2, and I'll get back to why I think that.

The potential of season 1

When I look back on season 1 I feel really nostalgic. No matter how many small details that irked me, I can't deny that the setting of the show is beautiful and I really appreciate the depiction of it. Instead of showing Oskarshamn as a boring small town, we're shown the beauty of it which is incorporated into the storylines.

Some examples would be Ludde and Felicia's first date at Gunnarsö and walk through Havslätt, the gorgeous view of the Oskarshamn harbor from Klara's house Villa Högklint, and Badholmen where the school band performs and we later see Elias and Amie walking by in season 3. All these places are listed on the Eagles Oskarshamn site and I feel like they did a great job tying the storylines in with the locations.

Another aspect of season 1 and its writing that I really enjoyed was Elias and Amie's budding relationship. They just have a natural chemistry together and the dialogue between them also felt authentic and sweet.

Season 1 is just a very polished teen drama overall compared to some of SVT's previous series.

Back in 2007-2010, SVT used to air a soap opera-style show focusing on a few teenagers living in Gothenburg that was called Andra Avenyn (translation: Second Avenue). I was only seven at the time but I watched this show religiously as it aired three times a week. Just mentioning the show brings a lot of nostalgia.

Andra Avenyn amassed around 500 000 viewers per episode and was, just like Eagles, nominated for a Kristallen television award. But how good was it, really? If I take off my rose-colored glasses for a second and actually consider the show's highly dramatized storylines and unlikely scenarios, it had a tendency to drag on (which usually happens with soap operas). It didn't offer a realistic view of teenage life and on IMDb it currently sits at a rating score of 5.6 stars out of 10.

Comparing this old teen series to SVT's newer one, Eagles season 1 was a huge improvement and continues to be the most popular teen series that SVT has aired so far.

This idea and all the characters have lived in Stefan H. Lindéns mind since 2008, while Andra Avenyn was still on the air. It's actually amazing how high the quality of most TV shows has risen since then. Eagles has a rating score of 7.4 out of 10 stars on IMDb and has become internationally known in a way that Andra Avenyn never was.

Eagles season 1 laid the groundwork for SVT's most successful teen series of all time, and that's a huge achievement.

Season 2: "Subverting expectations"

When Eagles came back for season 2, the script made it kind of obvious that the writers had listened to the critique of season 1 being predictable.

I did find season 2 a huge step up from season 1—the directing was so much better and when it came to the script we got a deeper look into all the characters that they hadn't really scratched the surface of in the first season. My main disappointment however was that it felt like they threw in a bunch of weird plot twists just for the sake of "subverting expectations".

The core idea of subverting expectations can be great if done correctly. You lead the audience to believe they know what's going to happen, but then you surprise them with an unexpected and clever twist.

A post in Cinematography written by Mason Leaver defines the phrase of "subverting expectations" as:

[...] a method of surprising the audience with some element of a story, be it the plot, themes, characters, etc. This goes beyond a “twist” in a film. Expectation subversion actively works within the genre of a story, and attempts to reinterpret or subvert the conventions of that genre, breaking patterns in surprising and interesting ways. However, this method of surprising the audience is not always well received- it can sometimes be the source of heavy criticism from fans of the tropes which have been subverted.

This included "unexpected" relationships such as Elias/Klara and Amie/Ludde. The former actually worked, but the latter? Not so much.

Amie's crush on Ludde—make it make sense!

Amie and Ludde were my biggest issue with season 2, and it felt so out of character of Amie to be head over heels for Ludde. They work great as friends but romantically they're a huge mismatch.

But they have music in common, I hear you say. Yes, they do. But having a shared interest doesn't mean people are automatically a good match. You have to consider their chemistry and overall compatibility.

Before actors are cast in a show or movie where their characters will be romantically involved with each other, it's common to do what's called a chemistry read. Here's a neat description from an article in Backstage written by Caroline Liem:

Chemistry is the complex emotional or psychological interaction between two people. If this were a romantic article, it would be about love. Instead, we are discussing the astonishing rapport between two actors, and how that connection is achieved in order to book [...] the role. A chemistry read is an opportunity to read with actors being considered for a role opposite yours, usually lead roles. The main purpose is to see how you instinctively connect and work with the other actor.

This obviously wasn't done for the actors playing Amie and Ludde, since there didn't seem to be any intention of having their characters be involved in a romantic relationship.

That was even confirmed by Stefan H. Lindén in his Q&A of season 2, where he said that a love triangle between Ludde/Felicia/Amie was planned but later scrapped.

I can confirm that from the beginning of development of the series and the first version of the storyline a triangle drama was at some point intended for season 1 but later removed  – however when creating the characters, Ludvigs skill in music and arts was always there from the beginning so by knowing that, we always knew that interactions would appear between them. When looking back at Season 1, in the first scene by the lockers when Amie tells Felicia who Ludvig is, she does know exactly who he is and she is well aware of that his friend Tobias is a music guy that Amie wants to get to know. Also when looking at it, when I was the same age as Ludvig and Amie I, and I am sure a lot of people can relate to it, fact is that we never really knew if it was love or friendship in the beginning.

Knowing that the triangle drama was scrapped for season 1, it makes sense why it seems so arbitrary. There was no groundwork laid down for this pairing before it was hastily thrown together in 1x06 for a cheap plot twist. This continues in season 2, where Amie and Ludde start spending more time together. Yet it's hard to see Ludde as a potential love interest for Amie in the way the writers want us to. They still come off as friends despite having hooked up at a party.

I mentioned that Tobbe should've stuck around for season 2 and here's why. Tobbe was written to be the leader of the school band that Amie later joins, and he was friends with Ludde before the video was posted. He would've been a perfect fit for the Amie/Ludde music storyline but he's completely absent. He had the potential to be the person who could've helped them with the song a little and then later picked up on whatever there was going on between them.

I think the Amie/Ludde storyline could've hugely benefitted from a scene between Amie and Tobbe, where Tobbe asks if she actually has feelings for Ludde and we get to hear exactly what Amie is feeling. Maybe she's torn, not wanting to get together with Ludde because of how much they hurt Felicia, but at the same time finds it hard to suppress her feelings. A scene like that would've allowed us to get into Amie's head and make the Amie/Ludde storyline much clearer.

To add, this storyline was in desperate need of more interest from Ludde's side. There needed to be some indication from him that would make Amie believe he liked him back, even if that wasn't the case. All we get is Ludde complimenting Amie's song and then a hug in 2x05 when Amie says the record label in Stockholm wanted a meeting. And apparently, that was enough for Amie to think Ludde was interested in her despite him blowing off the Stockholm meeting and Amie hearing Ludde say that the Halloween incident was a mistake.

Ludde and Amie don't really mesh as well as Elias/Amie do or even as well as Ludde/Felicia do. Elias and Amie had sparks flying from the very first scene they shared. That pairing is one of the main reasons why the show became popular internationally, and why is that? Because of the actors' chemistry.

Amie and Ludde are a clumsy attempt at throwing together two people who don't really work together with the intention of "subverting expectations". And I suppose that's what the writers wanted to depict—an awkward crush that doesn't really make sense, which I'm sure many people have experienced as a teenager. That part is fine. But what I didn't like about this storyline is that Amie had no good reason to believe Ludde would be interested in anything with her beyond a platonic friendship.

While season 2 was airing, I was convinced that Amie wasn't actually in love with Ludde. She was just lonely after the aftermath of the Halloween video and mistook her feelings for Ludde as love when she just appreciated his company. Here's what I wrote:

So as we know, Amie kissed Ludde in episode 6 when he was in the hospital after having been injured during the hockey game against Karlskrona. She immediately seemed to regret having done that and ran out without an explanation, leaving Ludde alone and confused. I honestly don’t think Amie has any romantic feelings towards Ludde. I think she might mistake her feelings for a crush or something, when in reality she’s just lonely and appreciates Ludde always being there for her and giving her compliments on her musical ability. Ludde was complimenting Amie at the hospital, saying she was amazing, and I think Amie was just really touched by that and maybe wanted to thank him somehow, and ended up kissing him. And then she freaked out and left because oh my god did she really just kiss Ludde. It was an uncomfortable and awkward situation and that’s probably why she ran out. However, I really believe that if she had just stayed to explain and apologize, Ludde would understand and they could’ve just laughed it off. But this is a drama show so of course that wouldn’t happen! Do I think the writers are making them into a couple? No, definitely not. They know that season 1 was sort of predictable and cliché, so they’re making season 2 as different as possible by including these unexpected pairings such as Klara & Elias and Amie & Ludde. But Amie and Ludde won’t ever be a couple, because Ludde is still very much hung up on Felicia. I don’t see them as a couple either - yes, they have music in common, but they work way better as friends than in a relationship.

In Edvins Skådisdrömmar, which is a behind-the-scenes documentary of Eagles season 2, writers Fanny Ekstrand and Michaela Hamilton discuss the writing of the show in the documentary's third episode. The third episode is mostly focused on the lead-up to the scene where Amie kisses Ludde at the hospital. Adrian Öjvindsson, who plays Ludde, says:

Filming the kissing scene was [...] awkward and weird, actually. And that's how it ended up. Yandeh and I haven't really had any intimate scenes. In this case you could take in that it was weird, because that's also what the scene wanted to depict.

When Edvin reads the script, he describes the scene as a "nightmare" scenario. I agree. And the lazy build-up to this Awkward Kiss trope doesn't make it any better, because just like the Halloween incident this doesn't make a lot of sense.

It's supposed to be awkward and weird, just like Adrian said. But he also mentioned one of the most important details: Yandeh and I haven't really had any intimate scenes.

Before this kiss scene, there was nothing that indicated any chemistry between them. No accidental hand-touching, no longing stares, no nothing. Just a friendly hug. A proper build-up to the kiss scene would've made it feel less out of place.

The love confession from Amie to Ludde in 2x10 really threw me off as well. The confession to me made no sense and honestly felt like a prank call. There was no feeling behind it and zero reason for Amie to believe that there was a chance Ludde liked her back.

At the end of 2x08, Felicia goes to Ludde's house after he's confessed the truth to the police about the Andreas situation. Amie happens to overhear the conversation and she hears Ludde very clearly say that he's not interested in Amie.

Ludde: Felicia, there’s nothing between us. Between me and Amie. It was really the biggest mistake of my life. Felicia: Goodbye, Ludde. Ludde: Felicia, please!

Amie, now having her heart broken, crosses Ludde's name off the contract while crying. She knows he doesn't feel the same. So why would Amie even bother to call Ludde up to tell him she's "in love with him"?

Amie: [...] Hey, Ludde… Ludde: Yeah? Amie: It feels really weird to hear our song now. Because I know who the lyrics are about. And… And I… I really like you. Or, well… I’m in love with you. I just need to know how you feel. Or if you feel anything. Just tell me. Ludde: I’ll always want to be your friend, Amie, but… It’s Felicia I’m in love with.

This moment is on par with the awkwardness from the hospital kiss between them in 2x06. The second-hand embarrassment with this one was really rough, and what I don't understand is why this was even added to the script when Amie had already gotten the confirmation that Ludde didn't think of her in a romantic way. This storyline could've ended in 2x08 after Amie overheard the conversation between Ludde and Felicia.

It really didn't need to drag on for the whole season, essentially making Amie's whole storyline in season 2 about a guy. Her moment of finally getting signed to the record label was ruined when it could've been regarded as a fresh start if the storyline had just ended where it should have.

What this storyline did instead was ruining my favorite friendship of season 1, which was Amie/Felicia. This mess made it so hard for them to reconcile and they didn't end up properly addressing it until 3x09, spending almost two whole seasons mad at each other. It sucks that the writers decided to drag out their fighting and disagreements for this long when they could've instead shown two girls in solidarity who don't let a guy get between them and their friendship.

Amie apologized in 3x03 for how she hurt Felicia, but Felicia made it clear in 3x06 that she still harbored ill will towards Amie for what happened at Halloween (which in the timeline of this show was more than a year ago).

Felicia (to Amie): Are you going to start slobbering with [Elias] now too? Just give me back that sweater first, I don’t want slobber on that. Thanks.

I talked about how much I disliked the Amie/Ludde storyline in this post, with my main reason being that it really messed up the character dynamics that were established in season 1.

This storyline [of Ludde and Amie hooking up]—along with Amie falling in love with Ludde—is by far my least favorite one because it messed up the whole character dynamic. I feel like Amie and Felicia won’t ever go back to the kind of friendship they had in season 1 before the Halloween incident because the trust was so broken, and Amie really should’ve tried harder to apologize to Felicia like Ludde did instead of going after her best friend’s ex in season 2.

If there's just one thing I could change about this show, I would 100% get rid of the Amie/Ludde storylines. There is nothing that annoyed me as much as those storylines did.

Amie's musical ambitions

I've talked about this a bit before in another post because this was something that really bugged me about Amie's character in season 2. Here's what I wrote:

I honestly still feel like Amie’s whole storyline with sending in a rather basic demo written by two teenagers with little to no experience and then getting praised on it [by the Stockholm music producers] with comments such as “it’s going to be a real summer hit” felt so unrealistic to me. Maybe they only said that so Amie would accept their offer or something, but that’s still very strange because she would have still said yes without a doubt. I can understand that they thought Amie was marketable as a person and there was this bonus with her having gone viral before on Felicia’s Instagram, but that demo did not seem good enough for me to be immediately released as a single and then have them decide on the spot that Amie would be given a contract. I mean, come on. It never felt earned because we never really saw Amie struggling with her songwriting journey to achieve this dream. Sending in one demo to one record label and having them immediately want to make a whole album with you just doesn’t happen in real life unless the song is extremely good or you have a very unique voice. Amie is really talented but there are hundreds of people just like her, if not thousands. I was never convinced by her getting signed so quickly in season 2. I understand that they wanted to establish her as a successful artist [at the beginning of season 3], but that felt so rushed. I was so sure that the record label would screw her over and steal the song rights to record it with another artist who was already established, and that we’d have to see Amie work even harder to achieve her dreams. But we didn’t get that at all. Where was the struggle? [...] Of course I wanted to see Amie achieve success (and I was happy when she did), but the journey there was so bizarrely easy. She didn’t start to seriously work on making her music career become a reality until season 2. Amie had dabbled in music prior to that, like when she auditioned for the school band and did that performance of Follow, but she didn’t truly start to work towards it until season 2 when she decided to have her work sent to professionals in the business. And then, just five episodes later, she gets contacted by the record label in Stockholm. To put this into context—season 2 took place somewhere around March, and episode 5 around three weeks into April. So when Ludde first started helping Amie it took less than two months for her to get signed. You could argue that the song was just that good or that Amie is just that talented, but it never felt like a realistic storyline to me.

It's tricky to write a storyline like this when you only have ten 20 minute episodes in the season and a limited amount of screentime for every character. All that is understandable. But it's strange that they didn't opt for a time jump to really sell this storyline and make it believable.

Eagles uses time jumps a lot, but somehow this particular plot point was omitted from that and kind of glossed over. I don't really understand how they expected us to buy this storyline. The viewers aren't stupid, and more effort should've been put into this storyline.

In the post where I wrote this, @gajana18 also had an interesting thing to add:

[...] it's equally unrealistic that this huge record company would be hounding Amie, a teenage onehit wonder essentially to come back to the label- don’t they have other bigger artists?

This is a very strong point. Considering how Amie kept expressing that she wanted to finish school and then proceeded to ignore their calls, it's weird that they didn't just decide to discard her contract when Amie clearly wasn't taking her singing career as seriously as they wanted her to.

So, back to season 2. Maybe they could've gone with the record label stealing the rights to Amie's first song and screwing her over. This fuels her to try again and after a time jump of a few months we see Amie having worked really hard on a new and better song. Maybe even a whole album. And this time, she's learned from her past mistakes and improved her songwriting. This time, she's successful in her endeavor and it feels so much more earned after knowing the struggles she's been through to get there.

I also feel like a storyline like that would've made people sympathize with Amie more in season 2. It was really hard to root for her when she had nearly screwed Ludde over by not giving credit to his songwriting and saying "fuck him" when he didn't return Amie's feelings.

Klara's character development

When we're introduced to Klara in season 1, she's a stereotypical mean girl with wealthy parents who is the popular girl at school and has her own followers.

In season 2, the writers decided to develop the character. We find out Klara has issues at home and her mom is barely there. When she is, her parents will start fighting. Klara is feeling really lonely and doesn't really hang out with her friend Sara as much as she used to.

I appreciated the added depth, but it seemed like a drastic shift. The changed perspective could attribute to that but when you step back and really look at s1 Klara and s2 Klara, they're like two completely different people.

Maybe Klara's reputation suffered after she posted the Halloween video? Maybe she had a change of heart after Felicia finally confronted her during Lucia? I mean, I guess.

But what most fans (including me) didn't like about Klara in season 2 was that there were no clear consequences for her after she posted the Halloween video. Klara still hangs out with what seems to be the popular crowd and she has people to go out with. In a post I wrote last year about my thoughts on season 2, I wrote this:

I actually wish that Klara would’ve become more ostracized from her school friends to emphasize how alone she is, but she seems to still be pretty popular so that was kind of disappointing. I thought the fall-out of her posting the video would be worse, but I guess not. Anyway, I like that they’re taking a disliked character and making her into a better person. Feels like it’s been done a few times before, but I still appreciate them doing it. I hated s1 Klara for being so one-dimensional, but s2 Klara is well on her way to being a pretty good and nuanced character.

Her character development sort of comes a little out of nowhere, though. Her reputation wasn't ruined by posting that video and she didn't really lose any friends besides Sara (she had already lost Amie prior to posting that video considering what Amie said to her after Lucia in 1x08).

So what prompted Klara to become this whole new person who actually considers other people's feelings in a relatively short amount of time? Here's a conversation between Felicia and Klara in 2x07.

Felicia: Was there anything in particular you wanted to talk about? I understand that we’re not best friends just because you and Elias are together. We’re not here without a reason, right? Klara: No, I get that this feels weird for you. And if you don’t trust me after everything that’s happened - or that I’ve done. Felicia: Klara… Klara: I know that I haven’t acted like the world’s best person. And I regret that. Sorry.

But why does Klara regret her past behavior? What made her realize she hadn't acted like the "world's best person" if the ramifications from posting the Halloween video were so minimal?

Was it the relationship with Elias that made Klara change? No, I don't think so. When they first start talking at the bar in 2x03, Elias tells Klara that he doesn't always agree with Felicia and that he has his own viewpoints. In 2x07, he says Klara wasn't the one who messed up, but rather Amie and Ludde. And in 2x09, the script tells us that the Elias/Klara relationship seemed to bring more change to Elias rather than Klara.

Felicia: What did you do to him? Klara: What? Felicia: He’s smiling. Elias is like a whole new person since he met you. Klara: Stop. Felicia: I mean it!

So what made Klara change? In 1x08 she's mocking Felicia's drug problems and posts a video that will for sure ruin Amie's reputation. But at the start of season 2, she's suddenly become more withdrawn and considerate of people's feelings.

I can only name one factor that actually makes sense, and that's the fighting between her parents. Klara seems to turn into this quiet child when she has to listen to her mom and dad yelling at each other. This is something that didn't really begin until season 2, when Ola's company GECED started going under. This storyline was very well done.

But the other things, like Klara's reputation and friend group which you would assume would be affected, remain as they were in season 1.

Jack's sudden character change

Jack came into season 2 as a charming and charismatic character, seemingly fooling everybody into thinking he was a good guy. He knew the Kroon family from before and both Felicia and Elias were none the wiser when it came to the eventual reveal of his true colors.

Here's what Stefan H. Lindén had to say about the Jack character in his season 2 Q&A:

Bringing Jack in was actually originally not my idea, it came from my writer colleagues after that they revised my storyline notes for Season 2, while I was still down in Oskarshamn shooting Season 1. We had always intended for a character to come in and raise the stakes but I never imagined it to be Jack. When we started to develop the character, we all started liking him so he was kept in the story. Like with any new character we never really know who they are and what [the] point of them for coming in is [...]

Personally, I feel like the point of Jack's character is pretty obvious. When he first comes to Oskarshamn he is very much the embodiment of the new love interest coming in to date the girl who has broken up with her previous lover, while the previous lover still loves her and does anything he can to get her back although she's dating someone new. Jack is the Romantic False Lead trope who later becomes an alpha-dog Jerkass.

What I found interesting about Jack compared to Klara (in season 1) is that Jack isn't just a bad guy. He's very clever with his manipulation tactics and can easily charm people with his good looks and charisma.

When Felicia accuses Jack of cheating in 2x07, he manages to spin the whole thing around and make Felicia apologize to him and say it was stupid of her to believe he would cheat on her. I talked about this in a post while the season still aired, before Jack's true colors were revealed. Here's what I wrote:

I still don’t know if Jack really is cheating on Felicia with Olivia (the girl that texted him) but I would say he is. Jack is incredibly confident and charming, which makes him able to easily lie and manipulate people. We know he’s not an entirely good person since he’s already lied to Elias about not knowing that Mats would bring him back to Eagles. I wouldn’t be surprised if he really did hook up with Olivia and ended up being a really good liar. The fact is that not only did he deny it but he then shamed Felicia for blaming him and causing a scene, ultimately shifting the focus in the argument to her and making Felicia feel bad that she even confronted him in the first place. Jack says that maybe they shouldn’t even be together, which causes Felicia to backtrack and apologize. It’s actually pretty impressive how Jack was able to spin that around to blame Felicia and make her apologize.

Jack is able to take a small detail and use it as ammunition to get what he wants. In this situation, he brings up the girl in the Stockholm club that Felicia partied with and also kissed.

Jack: You shouldn’t accuse me, either. Felicia: What? Jack: I saw on Instagram, you and some girl in Stockholm. Have I whined about that? Coming here and blaming me for things, it feels really immature. Felicia: Fuck. Sorry, Jack.

Jack wasn't bothered by that at all. It happened before Felicia and Jack were even an official couple, and all they had done was hooking up at a party while Felicia was high. Jack, having cheated on Felicia, couldn't care less about the random girl Felicia kissed. That was just something he used to manipulate her.

When we discover that Jack is actually cheating on Felicia, he immediately reverts to a one-dimensional "evil" character. He's become the 2.0 version of Klara in season 1—written in just to stir up drama.

This "master manipulator" version of him just goes down the drain and Jack turns into a manchild who starts petty fights, files a police report because Ludde pushed him, and says to Felicia "I'm gonna tell on you!". Alright, maybe those weren't his exact words, but you know what I mean. It's a sudden shift and you start wondering how Jack was able to hide this version of himself so well before.

In 3x05, Jack sees Ludde and Andreas after a hockey game and fumbles trying to find any insult he can to hurl at Ludde. Everything he says from that point on is just line after line to really solidify that Jack is the bad guy. You didn't forget that, right? Here, let's have Jack call Felicia a druggie so you know just how shitty he is. And have him call Andreas a junkie later for good measure—there, that should be enough for people to understand that Jack is the villain here.

Jack: Johansson! Ludde: What the hell are you doing here? Jack: What does it look like? Ludde: I guess it’s you I should thank for the victory. Nice work. Jack: What is Felicia doing these days, then? Does she miss me? Ludde: Hey, you’re shutting up now, do you get it?! Jack: Jesus Christ. Do you think you can save her? What do you think she even sees in you? You two play in different leagues, Ludde. Ludde: You have no idea what we’re like. Jack: Come on! You should leave her. While you can. She’ll just pull you down into the dirt with her. You’re no hero, Ludde. Isn’t she still doing drugs? Once a druggie, always a druggie, right?

Jack is a horrible person, but at least he was able to pretend to be a good guy in season 2. And that was actually really fascinating. I wish we could've seen more of Jack's manipulative side that he showed in season 2 instead of making everything coming out of his mouth be a half-assed attempt at insulting the other person. That's a pretty boring villain, in my opinion.

Jack's backstory of his father being an alcoholic and him starting to resent the whole Kroon family because they had everything growing up while he didn't is interesting. It would've also made more sense if his anger was only directed towards the Kroon family since they're the ones he grew up with. They're the ones he was after the whole time.

His anger towards them feels cheapened when Jack also starts insulting Andreas (who he's probably never met before) for no good reason. It's like Jack's human qualities are just gone and all that's left is this empty shell made to start fights. His backstory didn't really make anybody sympathize with him, either.

The improvements of season 2

What I liked about the writing in season 2 was that they explored new ideas and had some solid storylines (besides the mess that was Amie and Ludde). Elias and Klara actually worked pretty well as a couple, even if they were pretty much the 2.0 version of Felicia/Ludde as the "wealthy, popular pretty girl starts dating the star player on the sports team".

Felicia finally gets some more depth. The scene at the end of 2x02, where Felicia and Leila park their car near the harbor and just start crying, is so powerful.

2x05 is also one of my favorite episodes of the show, as well as the ending montage of the 2x10 season finale. In Gameday, we had a very touching scene between Felicia and Mats where they finally communicate. It's not the most understanding conversation but it's a start. It's an interesting contrast between their talk in 1x06 where Felicia revealed she saw Mats cheating on Leila versus the talk they're having now.

Another one of my favorite scenes is when Felicia and Ludde meet up at their bench in 2x10 after Ludde has called her up asking Felicia to come if there's any chance of them getting back together.

The dialogue is simple and to the point. There's no long-winded love confession for the sake of drama. It's a moment that the whole season has been building up for, and when we finally get there we realize that this is how love should be.

Easy and simple.

Ludde: You came back. Felicia: Yeah, I did. Ludde: Do you remember our first date here? Felicia: No. I’ve forgotten. Ludde: I was so freaking nervous. Felicia: Everything you said… Did you mean it? Because you hurt me, Ludvig. And I… I’ve really tried to hurt you back, but… It’s not possible. I can’t… Not love you. Do you think… Do you think it can be us again? Ludde: What do you think? Felicia: I don’t want anything else.

Ludde admitting how nervous he was on their first date is sweet and shows us how much they've been through. Felicia is struggling to find the words to say and she's acknowledging how hurt she was, but still can't seem to find it in her heart to hate Ludde. It's honest.

Another plotline that I think was a little underrated in season 2 is the GECED company going bankrupt and Ola, Klara's dad, is under investigation for financial crime. This isn't a storyline you would usually see in a teen series. It's much more serious. It also gave us a really touching and poignant scene in 2x08 between Ola and Klara sitting on the floor of his office, where Klara has to comfort her father who starts crying.

Ola: When you were little you used to sit like this. On the floor, while I was working. You had your own room, but you wanted to sit with me. “Help daddy work”. Mom’s doing the right thing by leaving for a while, don’t blame her for that. Klara: What, you can’t just leave because things get a little tough. Ola: Maybe you should get away for a while too. You know, I never wanted you two to… That you… Everything’s gone. Klara: It will be fine. It will be fine. Ola: Sorry. I’m sorry.

In 2x09, Klara is at a party when she notices a bunch of missed calls from her dad. She immediately senses something is wrong and rushes home to find her dad having attempted suicide. It's executed very well and I really liked the more serious tone they went for in season 2.

It set up season 3 perfectly, which continued with the darker themes but balanced them very well with the more light-hearted moments.

Season 3: Finding one's footing

Season 3 was a highly anticipated season. I thought the season 2 finale was masterfully done and it left me wanting more. When season 1 finished on its cliffhanger of the video leaking, the focus only seemed to be on that.

But with season 2 there's Felicia/Ludde getting back together and Ludde having been sued by Jack, Jack threatening that he would leak all of the Kroon's family secrets, Klara's dad passing away, Elias deciding to get on the train and go to the draft combine anyway, Amie having finally become a recording artist but being isolated and heartbroken... There's so much to unpack, and it's a lot more interesting than the ending of season 1.

Where's Jack?

Jack is supposed to be the main villain but he's gone for most of the season, failing to show up until 3x05. In the season 2 finale Jack makes a huge deal about how he's going to destroy Felicia's life. He's threatening her in a very violent and abusive way.

Jack: [...] I know a lot about you, Felicia. And your nice family. It’s enough for me to leak to one news site. I can destroy you. Do you get it? I’ll tell them everything. The drugs, the cheating, your abortion! Felicia: Shut up! Jack: Hey. Huh? Did you seriously think I wanted to be with you? The little Kroon princess, who has gotten everything for free her whole fucking life! You and Elias! Like spoiled brats! You don’t understand what it means to fight for something!

In 2x10, Jack decides to report Ludde for assault but he doesn't follow through on destroying this family that he hates. If there's anything Jack seems to despise above all, it should be the Kroon family, right? So why did he fight back with Ludde but not the Kroon family?

I expected Jack to leak all the Kroon secrets at the beginning of season 3, but Felicia seems strangely calm at the funeral which I'm assuming only takes place two weeks or so after Ola's passing in the season 2 finale.

Then, a whole year passes with no indication that Jack is ever going to leak anything. As season 3 was airing, I commented on how strange this felt in an ask I received:

One of my main questions about the time jump is the whole thing with Jack saying he was going to ruin Felicia’s and the Kroon family’s reputation in the press. It seemed like nothing really came of that? I’m pretty sure that detail hasn’t been abandoned entirely and that Jack will come back (we’ve already seen a glimpse of him in the third episode), but it feels strange that Jack threatened to leak all her secrets and then just never did. I got the impression that Jack was a person who, when having his pride wounded, would do pretty much anything to get back at the person who insulted him. And yet there’s no mention of where Jack has been during that time or what he’s been doing. I feel like I would be pretty paranoid about this if I was Felicia, but we don’t see this haunting her until episode 3 when she sees a flash of Jack before realizing it was just some random guy. It seems strange that Felicia was relatively at ease during the funeral (which I assume took place not long after Jack first threatened her) and after the time jump. We don’t really know what’s been going on during that year, but Felicia seems to be fine and like she hasn’t had any thoughts of Jack at all. Maybe she assumed that his threats were empty and that he wouldn’t actually leak anything to the press, which is reasonable but at the same time I don’t understand why Jack has yet to do anything after a year. He was really pissed off in the season 2 finale, after all.

Going to repeat one of the things I wrote here because it deserves to be mentioned twice, and this point is one of my biggest issues.

I got the impression that Jack was a person who, when having his pride wounded, would do pretty much anything to get back at the person who insulted him.

I feel like this was kind of a plot hole that wasn't explained. Jack is ruthless and doesn't hold back at all when his true colors come out. He has no problem talking about the sexual relationship he had with Felicia in front of her father. Jack is just that horrible.

So what prevented him from ruining the Kroon family's lives earlier, when it seems to be the thing he's wanted for years?

Michael's predictable predicament

Michael first appears at the end of 3x04, where he calls Amie up to tell her he's her father.

Man: Hey! Sorry for calling so late. Is it Amie? Amie Condé? Amie: Yeah. Man: I saw you on TV the other day. I’m Michael Condé. I’m your father.

In the next episode, we get a voice-over of the continued conversation between him and Amie.

Michael: [...] I understand if it’s shocking. I’m in Oskarshamn for work for a few weeks and— Could we meet up someday?

So, it's clear what the writers are going for here. It's the estranged father who returns into the child's life when they've become successful. We're made to believe it's a Daddy Had a Good Reason for Abandoning You trope when Michael meets up with Amie and tells her why he left.

Michael: So Petra, she— Has she said anything about me? Amie: Well… That you moved from Sweden before I was born… That you’re working as a lawyer. That you didn’t want to see me. Michael: I was… I was young when we met. Your mom and I. And everything went really fast. I was in love, but she had feelings for somebody else. And when she found out that she— That she was expecting you, then… She didn’t want me there. She said I wasn’t father material. To some degree she might’ve been right, but… I wasn’t much older than you are now. I had just gotten into a law school in Berlin. When I finally came back to Sweden, then… She didn’t let me see you. I had already lost you by then, but I want you to know that I— I’ve thought of you. And about a week ago, I… I’m seeing you. On TV. There you are. With my last name. I’m so proud.

However, it's pretty easy to identify the holes in Michael's story. To be honest this whole storyline was predictable from the very start. Before Michael even came into the story, I made this post which pretty much summed up Michael's whole character when we didn't even know he existed yet (this was when 3x03 was the latest episode that had aired).

I don’t think we’ve heard any mention of Amie’s dad in the whole series except for 3x02 when Amie was being interviewed and was asked about the Condé name where she said that while Samuelsson was from her mother’s side, and Condé was from “the other side”. I found her word choice a little interesting. I don’t think Amie’s dad has passed—but rather that he’s alive and just chosen to not be a part of her life, which is why Petra seemed to be a little offended when asking Amie why she didn’t want her last name anymore. This might also be why Amie said “the other side” rather than “my dad’s side” because they have an estranged relationship. [...] I’m not really sure if they’ll do anything with Amie’s dad (maybe they’ll go for that trope where the parent who previously abandoned their child returns after the child has accomplished something big/something major happened and the parent wants something from them for personal gain?).

When we actually get to meet Michael and hear his explanation of why he left, I wrote this post pointing out some of the holes in this storyline.

Michael meeting Amie only after she’s become famous is a little suspicious, but it’s understandable if he previously thought she didn’t want to meet him and then sees her with his last name on national television. Obviously he would contact her after that. I feel like there were some question marks with Michael’s whole story though, and the fact that his work just conveniently happened to send him to Oskarshamn after he’d just seen Amie on TV. Maybe I’m missing something here, but how did he know Amie had gone back to Oskarshamn if he saw her living as a pop star in Stockholm? Was this information about Amie quitting the tour and going back to her hometown even online? If Elias (who actually witnessed Amie saying she was done and quitting) seemed taken aback when he saw Amie in Oskarshamn, then how did Michael know?

I do think Michael will return for season 4 though, so hopefully this storyline will be straightened out a little. We don't really know what Michael has been up for the past few years and if he has a family of his own. Maybe he'll contact Amie again to tell her she has some younger half-siblings?

They ended on sour terms, but if Michael does have his own family it's something Amie deserves to know and she can decide whatever she wants to do. I'd also like to see a Michael/Petra reunion, but I'm getting a little ahead of myself.

This storyline wasn't bad, and I do appreciate we got to find out what the situation with Amie's dad was. I also liked how I was able to sympathize with Michael. He's not entirely awful, even if he did put a lot of blame on Petra. It's one of those situations where you don't really know what it's like to be in Michael's position unless you've experienced it, and it's very realistic.

Plot holes

Some of the plot holes of season 3 that I've already mentioned are how Jack waited a whole year before leaking the Kroon family's secrets and how Michael conveniently knew Amie was in Oskarshamn when nobody seemed to know she was coming except her mom.

I actually don't mind that it was never explained how Michael got Amie's phone number either, because that's usually pretty easy to find with a Google search. Things like addresses, economic status, and even your criminal history are easily accessible in Sweden when googling someone's name. So finding someone's phone number is probably fairly easy as well.

On the other hand, one of the most glaring plot holes appeared in 3x08. In this episode entitled Lost, the Kroon family is frantically searching for Felicia who has gone missing. Leila and Elias knock on Petra's door to see if Amie is there and might know something about Felicia's whereabouts. Petra tells them Amie isn't there and they leave.

Someone left me an anonymous ask which I answered in this post, pointing out how it was strange that Elias didn't just call Amie to ask her when she wasn't at home. We know Elias has her number because they've been talking on the phone and texting each other several times before in the season.

In 3x08, when Elias and his mom go to Amie's house and ask Petra if Amie has seen or spoken to Felicia or whether she's home, I couldn't help but wonder, uh Elias why not just call Amie and ask her if she has seen or spoken to Felicia? [...] if Elias had called her and she heard how frightened him and his family were and police being involved she would have told him and then there would be no point in the 3x09 episode really.

This is a very strong point. You could argue that maybe Elias just didn't think of that but if they went out of their way to visit Amie's house only to not find her there, it would seem like calling her instead would just be a logical next step in the situation? Here's what I wrote in response to this ask.

This is an issue I had with 3x08 and 3x09 as well. I had a hard time actually enjoying the moment between Felicia, Klara, and Amie knowing that her family was getting increasingly worried for her and even thought for a short moment that Felicia was lying dead at the bottom of the ocean. All that could’ve been avoided. To add, it didn’t make a lot of sense to me that when Klara finally decided to call someone she called Amie instead of Elias. An ex-friend of Felicia’s instead of her brother who could’ve helped a lot more. What was Amie supposed to do when she showed up at the hotel, exactly? I know there was the thing with Klara only knowing Amie’s number off the top of her head, but there is no reason why she couldn’t have gone down to the reception while Felicia was sleeping and asked to use a computer just to get a quick message to Elias. Like, “hey, Felicia attempted something bad but she’s safe with me, we’re at this hotel in this room but she didn’t want me to call anybody, I don’t know what to do”. That would’ve been so much better than keeping quiet about the situation for nearly 24 hours. I know that Klara probably has trauma from leaving her dad at the hospital after his suicide attempt and that she probably didn’t want to go against Felicia’s wishes. I understand the first part 100%. But Felicia was in a very bad place emotionally and was thinking that her whole family hated her when that wasn’t the case. I feel like in a situation like that you kind of have to be the bad guy just to ensure the family that Felicia was safe. Even if everything turned out alright in the end, it could’ve gone so much worse if Felicia had wanted to be kept hidden for longer. [...] Elias calling Amie would’ve been an easy solution to this whole debacle but we would’ve lost the drama. It’s still somewhat of a plot hole though, like you said.

I understand it was done this way for dramatic effect, but that doesn't really patch up the plot hole.

I also found it strange how many people turned on Felicia after Jack ruined her reputation in the press. I talked about this in an ask I received.

I don’t understand why the public turned on Felicia so harshly. And Leila too, for that matter. The way Jack told the story about how these two women had things done to them should indicate that they’re not the ones to be blamed. If I read this article and found out an 18-year-old girl got pregnant by a “violent criminal” who forced her to abort and then abused her I would not be angry with the girl. I would be angry that she was physically abused and also outed on her sexuality for being bi. If I read this article and found out Leila had been cheated on by her husband repeatedly with her best friends, I wouldn’t be angry at her. I would not agree with the decision to turn to alcohol (same as Felicia turning to drugs), but I wouldn’t blame them. And I feel like a lot of people should’ve been on Leila’s side after finding out the reason why they divorced. I don’t understand why people are saying they’re disappointed in Felicia and calling her fake when she’s been through so much trauma in her life. I feel like if this actually happened in real life, all the blame would be shifted to the men because they’re the ones who—in this story—are painted as the bad guys (with the exception of Jack, considering he was anonymous).

I got another anonymous ask sent in after this, pointing out how the anger directed towards Felicia was considerably more about her drug use rather than the abuse she endured. Here was my response to that:

[...] the drug use should’ve been understandable considering the stuff Felicia had been through was also written in that article. I don’t know. I can understand people unfollowing her if they didn’t want their young children to be exposed to all the controversy, but it’s still strange that everything Felicia received was hate messages. Did everybody just skip over the part where the anonymous source stated that Felicia was violently forced to have an abortion by an ex-criminal and probably did so out of fear for her life? Yes, we know this is fake, but why didn’t anybody seem to mention this? [...] they seem to have written this storyline with the idea in mind that the public was against the whole Kroon family. Felicia got comments such as “So fucking disappointed in you and your family”, “What a nasty fucking family”, “You and your family are so fucking disgusting”. So I think Leila received plenty of hate for drinking instead of divorcing her husband sooner and basically turning a blind eye to all the problems her family went through. That’s what Jack told the press, at least. The anger seemed to be directed towards every member of the Kroon family and that didn’t make a lot of sense to me.

Again, this is something the writers did to dramatize the situation and they kind of forgot to consider that what Jack actually told the journalist wasn't as incriminating for Felicia and Leila as it were for Mats and Elias.

The magic of season 3

What season 3 really excelled in, to me, was delving into some more serious topics as well as showing the gradual development of Amie and Elias' relationship. Amie and Elias are the prime example of how a slow burn is so much better than having a couple get together too fast, like Felicia and Ludde did back in season 1.

While season 3 was still airing, I wrote a post dedicated to questions I had received about Elias and Amie. Here's one of the things I said about them:

I think Elias’ interest in her really started to grow after he saw how caring Amie was to Felicia, and later on connecting with her on how they both ended up back in Oskarshamn after following their dreams which didn’t exactly turn out the way they expected. Yes, Elias has always sort of been watching and admiring Amie from afar, but that interest didn’t start growing until he actually got to know her. The experiences they had in the US and Stockholm, respectively, probably changed their mindsets and in my opinion it makes so much more sense for them to get together now than it would’ve in season 1 or season 2.

I still believe that Elias and Amie are the best-written couple of the whole show (at least so far), because they just make sense. We'll see what season 4 has in store for them because we have yet to actually see them in a romantic relationship, but I feel like their personalities and characters just fit together really well.

Another thing I really appreciated was the depiction of Felicia and Ludde's declining relationship. Things like that happen so easily, and I liked how we see Felicia do this huge gesture of planning a picnic for Ludde in 3x04 but there were still underlying problems between them. It's like that in real life too—no matter how big of a romantic gesture you make, communication will always be the number one priority in any relationship and that's where Felicia and Ludde fall short.

The obvious disconnect between them when it comes to money is also important. It's been like this from the beginning, but season 3 gave us an actual conversation about it.

Felicia: Please, I can’t talk about this. Seriously. It was stupid of me to bring this up from the beginning. Fuck, I get such anxiety talking about the future— Ludde: You get anxiety? I’m the one walking around with no money in my account. Mom and dad had to get a loan to pay off mine and Andreas’ fines. I’m playing on a shitty old synth, and living off you like some leech. That’s anxiety. Felicia: Everything isn’t about money. Ludde: Says the one who has money. Felicia: Move out then, if it’s so fucking hard to feel like a leech.

This felt very realistic. Of course a person like Felicia wouldn't think money is everything when she's never experienced financial issues. She's able to move out into her own one-bedroom apartment as soon as she's turned 18, it seems, and doesn't worry at all about the cost of furnishing and decorating it. She didn't even pay for it herself, because Mats mentions he's the one on the mortgage loan. It seems like Felicia has never had an actual job either, and that's starting to worry her because she has no idea what she should be doing.

Felicia: [...] I don’t know what I’ll be or what I’ll do in the future. I don’t know that. Ludde: You’re still an influencer— Felicia: Don’t say I’m an influencer, please. Do you think I want to be that my whole life? It’s not even a career. I'm— I’m graduating next year, and I… My grades suck, and— I have no plan. I only have you. Not like that—I have you. That’s what I have. I want to be here, in Oskarshamn. I don’t want to go to the US and chase some dream and be a hockey wife. That’s not a life. Sometimes I wish neither of us had a plan, just us together here.

Felicia's character finally offers something interesting here, which I've waited for since season 1. She's not just a party girl anymore who has issues with drugs. She's a privileged teenager who is co-dependent on the guys she meets and who has anxiety about the future, to the point where she wishes she could stay in Oskarshamn in her little apartment forever stuck in limbo.

She has to face a harsh reality when Ludde decides to break up with her, and later on when her name is slandered in the press and people all over the country are sending her hate messages. Her own family is furious with her and Felicia has nobody. She's pushed away a lot of people and her mental state is just crumbling in front of our eyes.

It's a strong storyline and actually very well executed. Almost everything gets taken away from her, and at the end of 3x07 you can almost feel what Felicia is feeling. We've been with her through this whole journey, almost, and we understand why she feels like suicide is the only answer.

It's tough to watch that final scene of 3x07. It's greatly amplified by Alva Bratt's superb acting, but the writing of the journey there is also amazing. It's very difficult to write a sensitive storyline like this.

Overall, I don't have a lot of critique towards season 3. I loved most of the episodes. I elaborated on this further in a separate post:

[Episodes 3x04 and 3x05] showcased what Eagles should be all about so well, which is relationships plus the struggles you go through as a teenager in a small town, and then of course hockey. The hockey game episodes are really good, even if I don’t think 3x05 topped 2x05 (the game where Ludde got tackled and knocked out). I loved the contrast in Date night of the budding relationship between Elias and Amie and then that fight between Felicia and Ludde on the cliff. [...] It was interesting to see how this sweet gesture from Felicia turned into a fight between the two of them. I thought that was very realistic, because no matter how big of a gesture Felicia made to apologize there were still underlying problems that they needed to talk about. I also loved the “non-date” between Elias and Amie in this episode. It was cute to see them goofing off before the movie started and then talking about it on the way home. I liked how Elias could connect to her on how they had both returned to Oskarshamn. The recent episodes that dropped last week (3x08 and 3x09) were very strong and discussed some important subject matters [...] They were dark, but not necessarily bad because they needed to happen. However, I have to say that I prefer Eagles when it’s about hockey and teenage relationships. 3x04 and 3x05 made me kind of nostalgic for season 1 and I liked the vibe they both had.

Eagles season 3 is in my opinion the best season of the show so far, and we haven't seen any signs suggesting that there is any reason for season 4 to not be even better.

Season 4: Hopes and wishes

Considering how each season has been increasing in quality bit by bit, I have pretty high hopes for the writing in season 4. I'm excited to see how the transition from teenager to young adult will be portrayed in the main characters, and what their future will hold for them after they've graduated.

My main questions are if Felicia and Ludde will find their way back to each other or if they'll remain broken up (that would be realistic as well), if Klara will reconcile with her mom, what's in store for Elias's hockey career, and if Amie will leave her label and maybe opt for something more independent.

I also want to see how Felicia deals with the new home she's checked in to, and if Ludde will in fact go to the school now that it seems Andreas will be getting into trouble again.

Amie and Klara are kind of wild cards here, because it somewhat feels like they've already reached their happy endings. Amie is famous and successful in her pop music career, and Klara has found her place as a businesswoman following in her father's footsteps. Maybe these developments should've come in season 4 instead of rushing them.

Nonetheless, I have faith in the writers. The writing suffered a little in seasons 1 and 2 but it has gotten better. Most of the things I pointed out about season 3 were just small details in an otherwise stellar season.

In conclusion...

This post was critical, but I tend to be critical of every show I watch. Eagles is still a very special show for me and having grown up in a Swedish small town myself I'm very fond of the show and its characters.

So huge thanks to the creator, Stefan H. Lindén, for making this show a reality and also to the director Carl-Petter Montell for contributing to the writing in season 3. And of course the writers of the show which include Michaela Hamilton, Fanny Ekstrand, and Anton Nyberg (plus Amanda Adolfsson who helped write 1x02 and 1x05 and Simon Ekbäck Nordström who is credited for helping with the hockey scenes in 3x05).

I hope you guys enjoyed this long, long post and major kudos to you if you read this far!

[writersrealmbts]

Clearwater Springs: Part 1

Description: ot7 x reader, reader’s choice, fairy/supernatural/soulmate au. The choices you make influence the story! In this world, war-torn and ragged, you’ve been offered a home and a job working as a librarian. Will you meet your soulmates? Will you ever find the shelves behind the piles of books? Who knows.

Warnings: None

Posted: 08/29/2020

Tags: ot7 x reader, supernatural bts, 

5,111 words

A/N: Once I was actually able to write, this came out really easily. I hope you guys enjoy it and don’t forget to do the pre-chapter 2 survey (link at the end of post)! 

You stared up at the house in a bit of a daze, still untethered. Still vulnerable.

“Isn’t it magnificent?! A real masterpiece, this house.”

You glanced at your over-enthusiastic caseworker, then looked back up at the grand Victorian house, wondering if the inside matched the outside, and why such a grand house was way out in the middle of nowhere. Why its owner would offer to take in strays, misfits, and others in need of a new home after the recent war when they were obviously still doing well despite the near economic collapse.

Your caseworker was practically bouncing up to the house, making you dizzy as he jostled the itty-bitty fountain you were temporarily tied to.

But you’d been dealing with that for a month, and you were getting pretty good at walking a straight line while the world appeared to spin around you.

“Now, if you and he agree at the end of the day, you’ll be tethered to a natural spring and the creek it runs into nearby, and you’ll stay in one of the spare rooms and you’ll help him organize and keep his library, which he runs as a traditional library—when organized—for some of the locals.”

You didn’t bother responding since he didn’t seem to be looking for a response, instead heavily trodding up to the front door as he rang the doorbell.

“Also, to simulate what life will be like, I’ll be leaving you for the day once I set your fountain down in a safe spot.”

“You said,” You murmured, closing your eyes for a moment, feeling yourself swaying from side to side. As a xana, you were originally tethered to a fountain many miles away, but as the war reached that town, your fountain had been damaged and your original workplace—a large library where you specialized in the children’s section, reading to them and singing your songs—utterly demolished. Because the fountain wasn’t completely destroyed, you survived. An experimental spell and three weeks later and there you were, standing on the steps of the home of a human where you would be exchanging work for a place to sleep and food to eat. You didn’t even need that much food, about a meal a day was enough for you when your tethered place was healthy and strong and not being jerked around like a dog was playing tug-of-war with it.

The front door opened, revealing a man with pink hair. “Hello, you must be Y/n. We’ve been expecting you. Welcome to Clearwater Springs.”

“We?” You asked, glancing at your worker.

The human did as well. “You told her about the house’s haltija, right?”

You relaxed. “Oh. Just a haltija?”

“Well, he’s also half-brownie, but thankfully that only manifests in the occasional clumsy or destructive moment. He’s quite friendly, though, and very fond of the forest,” The human spoke quickly, as though afraid you would pass negative judgement on the haltija—creatures who were known for guarding and protecting—for having brownie blood—admittedly, creatures who could become troublesome when disrespected, but otherwise also keepers of the home and chore-doers for the kind.

“I’m sure he’s very kind and gentle,” You replied.

“Right. And you’re a xana?”

You nodded.

“And...I’m sorry, I’m not sure what exactly that is, other than the fact that you’re generally tied to some form of pure water, like fountains, springs, rivers, waterfalls….”

You nodded. “I’m originally from a fountain. Um...I’m not sure how to explain what I am.”

Your caseworker took that hint. “Oh! Right, well, they seem to always know virtuous hearts through some test or other—though no one ever seems to be able to pin down the test—um, they have enchanted songs that bring feelings of peace and love to the pure and could almost kill those who are impure. Um, let’s see, she has combs made of moonbeams and sunlight, respectively. Can’t completely care for babies, but once they can feed themselves she’s fine.”

You frowned, fighting yourself not to glare at him. Your species couldn’t produce milk, so in the old days—before there was formula—it was a sort of changeling situation. A Xanino would replace a human child. Terrible, but true. Nowadays, most xaninos were adopted by naiads or other nature or house spirits—because now it was scandalous to try and raise your own child as a xana.

“Oh, she has treasure, but who knows where she keeps that—”

“It’s enchanted, you’re not supposed to know where I keep it,” You muttered, even though he wasn’t paying any attention to you.

“And she can give you a drink that we call ‘Love water’. Couldn’t tell you why, and I’ve never seen her hand it out. Think that’s it. Here’s her fountain, I’ll be back at sundown.”

The human almost dropped the fountain that was shoved into his hands, and if he wasn’t so surprised you thought he might have yelled at your caseworker.

But the car peeled down the driveway again, kicking up dirt.

You stared after him, a little disconcerted. “Mages.”

“Um, well, we’ve been preparing for your arrival. We’ve gotten the basement bathroom renovated so that you can shower or bathe in the waters of your spring when you need, and your bedroom is ready for you. We thought you’d prefer to decorate it with your things...but looking back now I probably should have known you wouldn’t have many things. It’s a hard time for everyone,” The human rambled, rubbing his neck. “Oh, I’m Seokjin, by the way.”

“Oh, yes, I suppose your name would be important. I’d hate to be rude and just refer to you as ‘The Human” when you’re my boss.”

Seokjin looked startled at the title. “I’d rather think of it as a partnership. I’ve been told I shouldn’t live alone, and you needed a new home. Also, my library is out of control and I have no idea where to start—I mean, other than the new library building that we just finished. Don’t worry, it’s very close to your water source as well, but your spring is still highly protected.”

You just nodded, wondering why he didn’t stare like most humans did. You were beautiful—that was one of the key points of defining a xana: being extraordinarily beautiful. Xana’s were considered more beautiful than any other species—and only a few other species even tried to contend with it since yours was more rare, and therefore more worth the attention.

“Um, let’s get inside so I can set this down. We’ll make sure Namjoon steers completely clear of it.” Seokjin stepped back and leaned his head in a gesture that suggested welcoming you inside and to follow him.

He led the way through the entry, and then to the living room through the arch immediately to the right. He took the fountain and placed it on a table that was against the wall—out of the way of general traffic. “There. Now, Namjoon should be around somewhere. Probably the garden, he likes it out there. But for now let me show you the house, including where you’ll be staying and then we’ll go and talk about the library. There’s a lot of work that I want to do, Namjoon is heavily involved in that too. He likes books, but between us...we don’t really have the skills to put what we want into action—which is why we’re really excited that you’re here.” He started the tour.

“I’ll do my best to h-hell, what is this hell?” You said, looking at the mess. It looked somewhat like a library, except you couldn’t even see the shelves. It was just piles upon piles of books, newspapers, journals, magazines, and comic books with a thin path between it all.

Seokjin winced. “It is...mildly organized. We’ve been receiving donations. Don’t worry, there will be a bigger place, we mostly just need to pack all of this up and move it to the new facility in an...organized fashion.”

You pointed at the mix of magazines and books. “This is organized.”

“I did say somewhat, didn’t I? We had a large influx of books very suddenly. Things got very messy in the chaos of it all. I think they were sending us books from destroyed libraries.” He shrugged a bit. “Don’t worry. We’ll be helping at every turn and I’m bringing in extra workers from town as needed.”

You supposed that was supposed to be comforting, but you were staring at a nightmare of a situation. One toppling tower, and there was no navigating through.

“Hyung? Is that you?” The pile asked.

Then it was all falling over and someone was diving out while Seokjin pulled you against the wall and out of the way.

Seokjin sighed. “Namjoon. Our guest is here.”

The man with blue hair looked up, then back at his legs (which were trapped under many books), then back at you. He stared at you with big eyes, looking a little flustered.

You took a deep breath. “Well, that is exactly what we didn’t want to happen.”

“Yeah. Namjoon, didn’t we talk about not going in there?” Seokjin bent down and grabbed Namjoon under the arms and pulled him out from the pile, helping him to his feet.

“I just wanted the next book in my series.” Namjoon rubbed the back of his neck. “I was doing okay until then.”

Seokjin shook his head a bit. “Namjoonie, this is y/n. She’s the one that’s going to stay with us and help with the library?”

Namjoon was definitely already staring at you, and he looked a little flustered and red. “Hi.”

“She’s a xana. Y/n, this is Namjoon, the haltija of the house.”

“Uh, nice to meet you,” Namjoon said hurriedly.

“Nice to meet you, too,” You replied, trying for a smile, but you were pretty sure you just gave him a woozy look.

“Maybe you should lie down before we continue the house tour? He was jostling your fountain around quite a bit.” Seokjin frowned toward the front door.

Namjoon nodded. “He’s right. You need rest. I can tell.”

You shrugged. “Nah, the world is supposed to be constantly spinning.”

“Should I carry her? Should I carry you?” Seokjin asked, sounding and looking a little panicked.

You shrugged. “I’m fine. This has been my life for the past three months.”

Namjoon’s eyes widened.

Seokjin looked like he was going to have a meltdown.

“Unless you’re going to have a panic attack, in which case you may carry me if it will help you,” You said quickly, concerned with how quickly he was freaking out.

Namjoon glanced at the human, then nodded. “I think that might be the only way to stall him out. He’s not wearing his glasses.”

You shrugged again, uncertain what not having glasses had to do with anything, and waited while Namjoon muttered something to Seokjin.

A couple moments later, Seokjin came over, muttering something about being sorry, then he carefully scooped you up. “Sorry, your dress is a little slippery. Silk?”

You nodded. “Yeah. My clothes just sort of...appear as I need them? Usually made of silk, but sometimes there’s a velvet cloak when it’s colder. Some linen when it’s warmer. Always dresses.”

“Cool,” Namjoon said, following the two of you up the stairs.

“I suppose so,” You replied, doing your best not to look at Seokjin. He was handsome for a human. And you’d never seen a non-fairy pull off pink hair before today. He had a sort of gentleness to his face, a softness that could easily become cold and judgemental. If that even made sense.

But honestly, there were very few things that made sense since the war had begun some ten years ago.

“Why is your hair blue?” You asked the haltija, looking over Seokjin’s shoulder as you realized you had been looking at him despite specifically thinking you shouldn’t and only noticing because his ears had started turning a violent shade of red.

“Oh...uh...we’re not really sure. It just sort of...changes now and then. A few days ago I woke up and it was this color. Before that it had been brown.”

“Did you two paint any part of the house?”

“Well, not in the same time frame as my hair color changing. And definitely not this color. Jin-hyung has this crazy theory that it’s connected to my soulmate or something.”

“You have a soulmate?” You asked, surprised.

He nodded, rubbing his left shoulder-pectoral area, which meant either his mark was located there or he had some muscle pain from his dive for freedom in the great August book-slide. “Yeah. Or...well, I have multiple sections in my mark...so, I guess I’m part of a soul-group. Probably a platonic one given my species.”

“You never know what’s waiting around the riverbend,” You replied, thinking back to Grandma Loire’s wise words when you had been fretting about the war. Granted, at that time, her words had been very wrong, but you wouldn’t begrudge the dead for their mistakes.

But also thinking about your own soulmark and the multiple parts in it. You were certain it was just a coincidence, but it was still an interesting fact that you filed away.

“You sound like a naiad,” Namjoon snorted.

“A naiad told me that. She was very wrong at the time. Told me not to worry about the battle in Manhattan.”

“Ooh,” He winced. “Very wrong.”

Seokjin held onto you a little tighter. “Where did you live before this?”

“Rocamadour. Our library was new when I started working there. Before there were a couple but they were in some towns over.”

“Where is that?” Namjoon asked.

“It’s in the Alps,” Seokjin answered, then paused at the top of the stairs. “Get the door?”

The door swung open before Seokjin had finished asking.

You craned your head to look at Namjoon, suddenly concerned with your privacy.

He held up his hands. “I can open doors and windows, I can’t see through walls. I can also hear things, if you want me to. If you want me to hear, just knock or tap your foot three times and I’ll listen.”

You nodded slightly and relaxed again.

Seokjin carried you into the room, which was painted such a calm color. The bed was a queen-size, and it was soft when he lay you in the middle of it. The top blanket was velvet-y and so, so soft.

Namjoon gave you a smile when you let out a sound of appreciation.

Seokjin smiled at you. “Well, I’m going to find out whether he’s coming back to check in on you tonight or not while you rest, then we’ll go over other things and go to the spring. Feel free to go anywhere in the house, as long as it isn’t one of our bedrooms. Mine is on the first floor, Namjoon’s is across the hall. Food in the kitchen is up for grabs unless it’s in the meal-plan that I have on the fridge. Oh, that door there leads to your bathroom, the one next to it leads to your closet, and this third door leads to your sitting room or office or whatever you want to use it for. We’ll let you nap now.”

Namjoon dipped his head as Seokjin pushed and pulled him out of your bedroom door.

You stared at the closed door for a moment, then lay back. You were still so accustomed to sleeping on your fountain or in your fountain that this felt weird. But it felt weird in a heavenly sort of way. You slid up and then managed to slide under the covers, a little excited about the silk sheets. It was so nice.

So heavenly that you woke up feeling so refreshed that it had to be illegal. Sure, you still felt a little off (because the fountain you were temporarily tethered too wasn’t the greatest), but you felt much better than before.

You slid out of the sheets, enjoying the feel of the hardwood on your feet as you cautiously checked out your bathroom, closet, and sitting room (which only had an armchair and a small sofa). Once you had tested the seats (because you had to know which would be your favorite, it was the armchair), you ventured out into the hallway.

Namjoon’s door was open, but you didn’t hear anything in there, so you decided not to bother him.

Instead, you headed back the way you had been carried, looking around for more detail.

The structure of the house, the woodwork, the moulding, the baseboards and the stairway all had a distinctly Victorian style, and all were likely original to the house. But the design was more subtle, softer, and more contemporary in the coloring and the furniture. It was a nice sort of mix that gave the house an air of elegance that was refreshing. You’d been in some victorian-style homes before and they had been so overwhelmingly Victorian that it was like you were trapped in England in that time period and about to choke on a piece of jellied eel.

You avoided the pile of books spilling out of the library (but did notice that they’d been somewhat cleaned up), and checked out the living room again with the ulterior motive of checking on your current fountain.

The style was even more contemporary there, yet still paid a nice homage to the house. A monochrome color scheme, with pops of color in some of the throw pillows and delicate accents in the artwork.

Your fountain looked cleaner than ever and had a healthy amount of water in it for once, which you honestly felt boded well for you. There even seemed to be a new coating of pebbles at the bottom of the small basin.

You flinched as a cat hopped up onto the table next to the fountain and took a drink from it. It was young, a long-haired calico, so soft and pretty looking.

You let it sniff your hand, humming softly before you carefully picked it up. You snuggled it, happy when it seemed to revel in your attention, even seeking it when you started looking over the books that were seperated from the library and on the shelf beside the fireplace. There weren’t many, but you recognized one or two of the titles, and the taste there seemed to vary widely. You figured they were probably books from both of the boys, and left them as they were to go try and find the kitchen for a glass of water.

The office was nearby, but didn’t look like it got used as an office very often, but definitely seemed to have a gaming station in one corner.

You found the billiard’s room next, noting that there was a ping-pong table folded up in a corner. It seemed pretty abandoned, clean, but not nearly as used.

Then a smell permeated the air, drawing you back toward soft noise and even softer humming, murmured conversation and the sizzling of something cooking.

You peeked into the large kitchen, smiling when you saw Namjoon reading in one corner, and Seokjin cooking at the stove. Namjoon seemed to be explaining the book to Seokjin, quietly passionate about it.

Seokjin was smiling and humming, possibly more focused on what he was cooking, but still seeming to hear what Namjoon was saying.

“Smells good,” You said quietly, slipping completely into the room. Trying not to disturb the aura.

Seokjin turned and grinned at you. “Hey! You look like you feel better.”

You nodded. “That bed is heavenly. And thank you for cleaning the fountain.”

He shrugged. “It looked like it had been neglected for a while. Namjoon found some pebbles for it as well because he read that once they’ve been exposed to the tether it can make a transition easier, theoretically.”

Namjoon looked embarrassed, rubbing his neck. “I figured it couldn’t hurt to try it out.”

“That was very thoughtful,” You told him, smiling at him as well.

He was bright red after that.

Seokjin chuckled. “I’ll have dinner ready soon. Then I thought we could head down to the new library building, and then maybe go into town. There isn’t much, but I do need to pick up some things.”

You took the seat that Namjoon offered. “That sounds like a plan. Who’s the kitty?”

“Oh, that’s Parsley. She followed us home one day and has been here ever since.” Namjoon pet the cat carefully. “She’s a good mouser, so we just sort of created a pact that as long as she keeps us pest free, we’ll keep her pest-free.”

“She’s a cutie,” You said, pressing your cheek against the soft fur and enjoying the soothing vibrations of her purr. It was just one of the many things that made you feel so comfortable here. That and both men seemed relatively impervious to your enchanting beauty, which was refreshing. It gave you hope that this would work out. That you wouldn’t always be free-floating.

“She is. Do you know anything about this bird that practically forced it’s way into our house?” Seokjin asked, pointing toward the ceiling.

You leaned to the left to look at the little black and white fluff-ball. “Was wondering when he would show up. He’s been following me for a while. Don’t know why, but he seems to have formed an attachment. Whether he feels like conversing is a completely different matter.”

“Does he have a name?”

“Not that he’ll tell me.”

Namjoon started laughing.

Seokjin gave you an exasperated look. “What do you call him?”

“Fluffball, marshmallow, cotton swab, cotton ball, cotton candy, fairy floss—he really doesn’t like that one—squishy, fluffy, Caspar, and Leo.” You shrugged. “Like I said, he won’t tell me his name. Just what his name isn’t.”

“So, none of those are his name?”

“Well, fairy floss isn’t. I’ve gotten to the point where I think he’s just waiting for someone else to settle on a name for him—preferably one he likes.”

“And until then, he’s just going to come and go as he pleases?”

You shrugged again, holding it for a while.

Namjoon was still laughing, his smile revealing some adorable dimples.

“So...is he a magical bird?”

You looked up at your feathered friend, and resisted the urge to shrug once more. “Maybe?”

Seokjin huffed. “What does he eat?”

“Haven’t the foggiest. He always leaves to eat. Sometimes I’d see him eating bird-seed, but mostly he just flies off and comes back well-fed. I think he eats insects.”

“Great. He can deal with the mosquitos.” Seokjin spared the bird a glance, then dished up the food. “The store might have some insects we can get for him, just in case. You never know. They always have weird things.”

“Really?” You looked forlornly after the kitty as it leaped off and disappeared through another doorway. “Is it a magic shop?”

“Well….”

“We told you that Jin-hyung is the only human in town, didn’t we?” Namjoon asked, eyes widened slightly. “Everyone who lives in the area is magical to some extent, except for hyung.”

You shook your head, a little stunned. “No. No you did not tell me that.”

But man was that an idea to wrap your head around.

Seokjin shrugged, having plated up the food. “This is a pretty popular place for refugees. Sort of remote and accepting of different species. A nice place to make a fresh start.”

“But...you’re the only human. Doesn’t that get...I don’t know...lonely?”

He blinked at you, then shook his head and shrugged. “No? I have Namjoonie, and now you’re here too. And yeah, I’m outnumbered, but they’ve never held my species against me. I mean, that’s probably because I did sort of pay for the whole town, which isn’t much. But more people come each day, and some people move on to other places once they’ve gotten back onto their feet. It’s like an adventure, meet some new characters, help them on their journey, then return home to sleep in a big, soft, bed with a full belly.”

And maybe the look of genuine happiness on his face was just a little too alluring.

Maybe you were just desperate to belong somewhere, because when he included you...it was like the world lit up.

And no, you were not tearing up.

His hand covered yours, warmth spreading from his touch to the mark that was hidden under the sleeve of your dress as he smiled warmly at you. “I really do hope that this place becomes your home. Everyone deserves to have a home.”

And then he was moving away, maybe not even aware that he was one of your soulmates since he was human.

“Come on, let’s eat.”

Namjoon quickly complied with Seokjin’s words, but you were slower to follow, trying to figure out how all of this had come about.

“I heard that a new van full of people arrived yesterday, so I want to see if I can meet any of them. See if we still have enough housing for everyone. That might mean a couple people staying with us in the house if there isn’t enough housing. Is that okay?”

You nodded, just following their actions, but not taking as much food as they did. Mostly because you didn’t need much food to survive, but it smelled good. So good, and Seokjin did cook it himself.

“Alright, then it’s a plan. Eat, see the new library, go to the store, meet people, come home.” Seokjin nodded firmly at the end of the list, then seemed to remember something. “And talk to your mage-handler and see about tethering you to the spring. That’s probably more important. We can do the other things tomorrow if we have to, but the tethering should be done sooner rather than later. That is, if you want to be tethered to the spring. You wouldn’t necessarily have to live here your whole life, we could always get you your own home, it would just—”

“Living here is fine, and yes, I would like to be tethered to the spring,” You said quickly, noticing how his speech was deteriorating. “I just have one question.”

“Oh?” He looked so genuinely concerned, leaning forward in his seat.

“Namjoon said you wear glasses, so...have you actually seen me?”

Namjoon snickered.

Seokjin’s ears turned bright red. “Um. Yes. Yes I can see you. I have seen you. I’m seeing you. I, um, I put in my, um, contacts. I can see you quite clearly. Also, I could see you when I was closer. Just, not after a certain distance. And yes, we do plan on actively protecting you when we go out.”

You nodded. “Just curious.”

Namjoon paused after swallowing. “The mage is back.”

Seokjin sighed. “So, town tomorrow then. I’ll go let him in. I suppose this means I need to offer him dinner?”

“That would be the polite thing,” Namjoon said, gleefully.

Seokjin muttered as he left the room.

“He’s...unusual for a human,” You commented.

Namjoon nodded. “Yeah. He is. But he’s one of the best human’s I’ve ever met. We’re really glad you’re going to stay with us, Y/n. I hope you never regret your choice.”

“I hope so too.” But you didn’t think you would.

Namjoon turned toward the door, eyes narrowed slightly before rolling his eyes. “Can you help me cover the food? Apparently Mr. Mage is insisting on doing the tethering now if you agree to it.”

You rolled your eyes and got up to help him cover all three plates and the platters and bowls with tin foil to possibly retain some warmth. You highly doubted you’d be eating again that evening since tethering made you impossibly nauseous and sleepy. “I won’t be very coherent after the tethering.”

He nodded. “We’ll make sure you get back here and into bed safely, or into the tub downstairs.”

You nodded, then followed him out to where Seokjin was listening to your mage, looking strained.

“Ah, so, have you decided whether you wish to be tethered to the spring here or not?”

“I have decided to be tethered, yes.” Anything to not be in his careless hands anymore.

“Excellent! I’ll get the fountain!”

“How about I grab it, that way your hands are free to do the actual spell,” Jin quickly intervened. “Namjoon can lead the way back to the mouth of the spring.”

You breathed a sigh of relief as the mage agreed to it. At least Seokjin would be careful.

“Alright, then lets head to this spring! I’d love to be on the road before dark.”

Namjoon’s chin jutted out slightly.

Seokjin just gave a pained smile, nodding. “Yes. Driving after dark is a pain. Namjoon. Lead the way.”

And you weren’t about to tell on Namjoon when you saw one of the floorboards pop up to trip the mage, because you kind of felt somewhat vindicated.

The forest around the house was made up primarily of spruces, firs, pines, and hemlocks with birches, oaks, and red maples popping through here and there. The path that the four of you took (with a little fluffball following overhead and a calico furball following behind curiously) was discreet, yet also fairly well-worn. As though walked often, but also well-cared for.

It was quiet, with varying degrees of density—some areas providing a wide view of the rest of the forest, and other areas being so dense that you couldn’t see a foot past the nearest tree.

Namjoon followed the path for a while, then diverged into the forest down what appeared to be a game-trail, something not walked often.

Then you could sense the water. It’s purity, it’s cleanliness. Free and untethered.

The creek was beautiful, and all of you followed it to the head of the spring.

You grinned when you saw it, a thrill going through you. It was beautiful and so clean and lovely and it was going to be yours.

Seokjin set your fountain down so that the mage could prepare the spell, then came over to you. “You’re sure about this?”

You looked into his eyes, the eyes of one of your soulmates, and nodded. “I’ve never been more certain about anything in my life.”

The corners of his eyes crinkled as he smiled, a little more carefree now.

You hoped you’d have the courage to talk about soulmates with him someday, but today you were going to have your soul ripped from a tiny fountain and sewn back into a spring. You only had so much courage.

And then the mage started the spell.

--

Survey Results used for this chapter: 

Namjoon-Blue (haltija), Seokjin-Pink (human), You-Cyan (xana) 

Silk, Book-Librarian, Creek-what your water source is attached to, House/Apartment/Mansion, Style-Victorian & Contemporary, view-boreal/boreal-mix forest, calico kitty, white bird with black wings, 

Whoops-meet Seokjin first, Oh No-meet Namjoon second, LaLaLa-C (some friends, some strangers), Loyalty-Soulmate au, Black-War tore through and you're all in relief housing situation.

--

Pre-Chapter 2 Survey

Next.

Masterlist.  ot7 Masterpost.

--

Taglist: @missmoxxiesworld​  @bryvada​  @i-dont-even-know-fck​ @knjhe​ @alex--awesome--22  @kerikaaria​ @killcomet​ @letsreadbts​ @taestannie​

[noona-clock]

The Dog Walker - Part 4

Genre: Dog Walker!AU

Pairing: Hanbin x You (Female!Reader)

Warnings: None

Part 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6 | Words: 2,065

Could things get any better?

You almost wanted to laugh at the fact that you’d ever thought that because yes, things had absolutely gotten better.

The day after Hanbin had requested you start coming out to say ‘Hi’ to him as he walked by your house, you had done just that. Instead of peeking out through your blinds, you actually went to the front door, opened it, and said ‘Hi’ to him. He said ‘Hi’ back, and then the two of you wished each other a nice day and said you would see each other tomorrow.

It took probably less than a minute -- definitely less than two minutes -- but it still managed to be the best less than two minutes of your day.

The next day, you decided to not only say ‘Hi’ but also comment that the weather was particularly lovely today.

“Perfect dog walking weather,” Hanbin replied with a half-smile.

“I trust you on that,” you called out as he gave Frankie one of the dog treats you’d left out. “You’re the expert.”

The day after that, the weather was quite the opposite. It had been extremely chilly and rainy all morning. If you hadn’t already seen Hanbin walking dogs in all kinds of weather, you would’ve wondered if you’d even see him.

But you had already seen him walking dogs in all kinds of weather, so you didn’t wonder.

You did, however, have to leave the dog treats, water bottle, and cookie on the small table in your entryway. It would be a hand delivery kind of day, apparently!

When the time came, you opened your front door, squinting your eyes through the rain as you leaned out just a little bit to see the corner of the sidewalk. As soon as you saw Frankie -- and then Hanbin -- you called out his name and waved him to your door.

As they both headed over, your eyes widened at just how adorable Frankie looked. He was wearing a yellow hooded raincoat, his leash threaded through a small hole on the back, by Frankie’s neck.

“Wow, I will never look that cute in a raincoat,” you said when Hanbin and Frankie arrived. You leaned over to grab the treat from your side table, squatting down to make Frankie sit before setting it in the palm of your hand and offering it to him.

When you stood back you, you could’ve sworn you heard Hanbin say, “I don’t think that’s true,” but it may have just been your imagination.

“Hmm?” you hummed inquiringly, lifting your eyebrows at him.

“Nothing,” he murmured with a shake of his head.

...Guess it was just your imagination.

You leaned back over to grab the water bottle and cookie, handing it to him with a smile.

“Oh, I guess -- you can eat the cookie here if you want. So it doesn’t get soggy.”

“Do you know of anything worse than a soggy cookie?” he asked before taking a bite.

“Not at the moment, no,” you chuckled. “That’s the kind of thing that makes me shudder just thinking about it.”

“Like nails on a chalkboard.”

You nodded quickly and shuddered.

Hanbin laughed softly before threading his hand through Frankie’s leash, letting it hang on his wrist as he used that hand to break the cookie in half.

“Here,” he said in his typical quiet voice, holding one half out to you.

“Oh, no, you don’t have --”

“Please.”

And there was just something about the way he said it. There was something in his tone that made your heart all fluttery and warm, so you bit your lip to hold back a very bashful smile and accepted the cookie.

“Thank you,” you said in an almost-whisper.

Hanbin opened his mouth slightly, obviously about to say something... but he stopped himself and instead shot you a tiny grin. “You’re welcome.”

After breaking off a smaller piece of your half-cookie and popping it into your mouth, you took a step back and told Hanbin (and Frankie) to stay safe and dry.

And, again, the two of you wished each other a nice day and said you would see each other tomorrow.

Thankfully, tomorrow brought much more pleasant weather. You figured you would stay in your doorway as Hanbin passed by, picked up the treats, and continued on with his walk -- as had happened the days before the rain.

But, to your surprise -- and utter, squeal-worthy delight -- Hanbin again broke his cookie in half and offered the piece to you, forcing you (in the most harmless way) to step out onto the sidewalk and join him.

He repeated his action the next day, even asking you how work was going. You ended up explaining your job to him as you slowly walked a few steps down the sidewalk, Frankie’s collar tag jingling delicately with the unhurried pad of his paws.

And in the days following, you found yourself joining him on his walk just a little bit longer than you had the day before. After almost two weeks, you were taking a much longer break than usual and walking around the entire block with Hanbin and Frankie -- and sometimes Banjo (who, luckily, had not had another run-in with a squirrel since that fateful day).

But did you feel even the slightest bit guilty about taking a much longer break from work than usual?

No. Absolutely not. How could you feel guilty when you were spending that time talking to and getting to know a perfectly nice and decent man?

...Okay, let’s be real.

Hanbin was not just a perfectly nice and decent man.

He was... 

Well, he was the most interesting person you’d ever met. He was shy and thoughtful and cautious and ambitious and serious and laidback and funny and you were never really sure what was going to come out of his mouth, but there was always a guarantee it would be something thought-provoking or amusing or... just plain interesting.

Clearly, he had the mind of someone who should be accomplishing a great deal more than he currently was.

Dog-walking was a very admirable profession, of course, but... Hanbin warned you constantly that he was, in many ways, incredibly dumb, and you had decided he was the smartest incredibly dumb person you knew.

You were just curious as to why he wasn’t doing something... more. Especially when it was obvious he was more intelligent than he realized -- or at least than he admitted.

“Can I ask you something?” you inquired as soon as you reached him at the bench.

Typically, you greeted him and Frankie first thing -- like any person would do upon meeting up with a friend. But your mind had been itching with this question since the day before, and you simply couldn’t wait a second longer to ask him.

“Sure,” Hanbin replied with a somewhat awkward chuckle.

The two of you saw and spoke to each other every day for close to ten minutes -- for almost two weeks straight now! -- and he was still shy and awkward around you.

It was adorable.

“How did you get into dog-walking?”

Hanbin lowered his eyebrows, his forehead wrinkling slightly in thought. “Well,” he began with a soft exhale. “My mom’s best friend owns the boutique, and I’ve always loved animals. Dogs, especially. I hung around a lot, and eventually, she just hired me.”

“Did you go to school? University?” you asked.

“I started to, but... it wasn’t for me,” he answered before turning his head just enough to shoot you a glance. “...Why?”

He was definitely trying to hide it, but you could tell from his shaky voice that he was nervous for your answer. Most likely, he thought you were going to judge him -- or were already judging him for not having a degree.

“I was just curious,” you answered, attempting to keep your voice light and carefree. “You have all of these incredibly deep and philosophical thoughts, so I just wondered how you got here. Dog-walking.”

“Actually, going on walks every day with someone who can’t talk to you kind of forces you to think about deep and philosophical stuff,” he pointed out with a strained laugh.

A grin appeared on your lips, and you looked over at him, wanting to make sure he saw that you weren’t disappointed or judgmental or any sort of negative emotion. “That is very true,” you agreed.

The two of you walked in silence for a bit, and just as you were approaching the last corner of the block, you heard Hanbin inhale sharply as if he were about to say something.

You lifted your eyebrows and glanced over at him inquisitively.

“I --” he started before abruptly cutting himself off.

After a brief few moments of silence, you said, “You what?”

Hanbin let out a breathy chuckle, shaking his head a little. “Nothing, I just -- I was going to tell you something, but --”

Again, he cut himself off.

“Tell me what?” you asked, your heart beginning to race just a little bit at the prospect of him wanting to tell you something.

“Well, I -- I don’t know, I just --”

As you both rounded the corner and your townhouse loomed in the very near vicinity, Hanbin began to slow his steps, preparing to drop you off as usual and continue on with his walk.

“What is it?” you murmured.

He didn’t answer you right away. instead waiting for both of you to come to a complete stop in front of your door.

“You... can say ‘no’ if you want to. Obviously. But what I wanted to tell you... I would like to tell you... over... dinner?”

It took a little while for his words to register in your brain.

But when they did, every working part of your body shut down. Especially your heart.

...Had Hanbin just...

Asked?

You?

Out?

Like... on a date? 

Or was it just dinner as... friends?

“Dinner?” you finally managed to ask, the word almost getting stuck in your throat.

Hanbin nodded before hastily adding, “I mean, you don’t have to, but I just thought it would be nice --”

“Tonight?” you interrupted.

A very small, almost invisible smirk pulled at Hanbin’s lips. “If you can. Or any night. Whenever you’re free.”

You wasted no time in telling him, “I’m free tonight.”

Because you were. Definitely.

...And if you weren’t, you had no problem cancelling whatever plans you had.

“Okay,” Hanbin chuckled. “So, I’ll come here? To pick you up? Maybe... seven o’clock?”

Apparently, you had used up all of your words because you now found you couldn’t find any. You were incapable of speaking, so you simply nodded and choked out a positive hum.

After fumbling through a good-bye, you slipped in through your front door and closed it gently behind you. You let out a very deep exhale, waiting until you heard Hanbin’s footsteps fade away before leaning back against your door.

“Oh my god,” you muttered to yourself. “I... I think I have a date tonight.”

But not just any date!

A date with Hanbin.

Cute Dog Walker Guy!

...Were you sure this was really happening? 

I mean, he had asked you out to dinner, but that didn’t necessarily mean he had asked you out. Right?

It wasn’t 100% definitely a date. Right?

Or... maybe it was? You hadn’t been asked out in so long that, apparently, you had totally forgotten what constituted a date.

The sound of a notification on your computer pulled you out of your ponderous haze, and you blinked quickly when you realized it was past time for you to get back to work. Your breaks had become longer ever since you’d started walking around the block with Hanbin, and this whole ‘is it a date or not?’ conversation you’d been having with yourself had added even more time.

If you were away from your computer any longer, you’d most certainly get in trouble, and while Hanbin was a very good reason to take a break from work, you didn’t want anything work-related occupying your thoughts after 7 PM tonight.

Because at 7 PM tonight, you had a date.

Yes, you were officially declaring that it was a date.

You were going on a date.

Tonight.

With Hanbin.

...Oh, boy.

Part 5