#(I am not kidding I have never cried while writing as many times as I have between the end of Part 2 and the first arcs of Part 3)

[dceasesd]

why juni ba’s the boy wonder has my favorite jason characterization of any contemporary comic run: a needlessly in-depth analysis (pt.1)

oh boy oh boy am i excited for this one buckle up boys it’s gonna be a long one. analysis under the cut (WITH PICTURES!!)

i, like many others, have many thoughts and opinions about juni ba's the boy wonder that i'd like to express. i was having trouble formatting my rant, though, so i decided that it was easiest to just address some of the common complaints i've seen about the comic and jason's characterization and insert my ramblings throughout it. so far i've seen three main complaints:

the typical boiling down of jason's character to "the angry one"

his lack of strategy going into the fight with the demon is out-of-character

the neighbor's kid interaction

to start with the first one-- when introducing jason's character, in both the second and first issue, ba uses the descriptors "coarse", "bitter", "hardened", "brash" and, of course, "rageful".

so, yes-- i understand where people are having issues with this characterization. however, even if it's overplayed, it's still important to remember that jason is angry, and is driven, in part, by his anger at bruce and the joker. and, as ba highlights, he deserved to be! completely erasing jason's anger is just as bad as defining him with it.

i also don't think it's wholly accurate to say that ba is boiling jason down to just his anger. it might seem like that when only considering the dialogue and narration, but jason's behavior in the comic doesn't perfectly align with how the narrator describes him. while the narration describes him as "rageful" and could be an instance of generalization, jason's actions throughout the comic are more aligned with two other emotions/motivators: fear and despair. we never see jason get actually, properly angry; the closest we get is when he's seemingly annoyed by damian (which i believe could be performative) and when he becomes violent, accidentally hurting damian.

even in this instance, though, he is not driven to this violence by rage, but rather fear. so, while ba states in the narration that jason is driven by his anger, he contradicts himself by highlighting how jason's sadness and terror motivates his character. this could be interpreted as lousy writing on ba's part, but i'm not going to attribute the paradox to that inference. to me, it actually represents a critque of the "jason is the angry robin" generalization, because it calls to attention the discrepancies between how one is described versus reality, an issue that jason both faces in the comics (bruce using him as a cautionary tale when dying WASN'T HIS FAULT) and outside of the comics, as mentioned previously.

furthermore, this highlights the difference between what jason believes about bruce's perspective and bruce's actual perspective (according to damian). jason believes himself to be a "failure", but damian refutes this by describing his conversation with bruce concerning jason, a conversation that does not align with jason's belief. if you couldn't tell by now, perception versus reality is a BIG theme in this comic (and for jason's character in general!)

i was really fascinated by ba's take on jason, because it veered pretty far from a lot of contemporary comics, most of which do, unfortunately, play with the angry robin jason generalization. they've been doing a bit with his fear, too, which has either been pretty fun or the most awful thing ever (i'm looking at you zdarsky. gotham war was fucked up), but what makes ba's jason stand out to me is how he grapples with his grief.

this boy is so sad. ba's jason might actually be the saddest rendition of him i've seen in canon content. we've seen jason grapple a little bit with the despair rooted in his death and resurrection, mainly in lost days, where he cries 3 (?) times, fresh out of the pit and very traumatized.

even in this comic, though, he reacts to his grief with anger more prominently than sadness. that obviously doesn't mean the despair isn't there, though-- anger is just an easier outlet for it (which i could really get into the masculinity aspects of that, but then this would be wayyyyyy too long).

ba's jason, though? that motherfucker is so. sad.

christ he's depressing. AND THAT'S SUCH A FRESH PERSPECTIVE!!!!!!! THANK YOU JUNI BA!!!!!!

now i'm pretty sure some people would argue that this rendition in out of character because he's so sad. to me, though, he's still the same jason; he covers up his sadness with anger and pettiness, redirecting his own insecurities onto those around him to mask his true feelings.

ba quite literally illustrates this in the comic. whenever he is being his snide, normal self, he has his red hood mask on; but when he actually opens up to damian and expresses himself truthfully, the mask is off. ba is highlighting how the classic jason anger and bitterness is, in part, a performance and coping mechanism.

this post is already too long, so i'll go over the two other critques in a different post, which i will link below (eventually). if you guys have any thoughts you'd like to share or discuss, my dms and asks are completely open! if you made it this far, i hope you enjoyed my ranting. look out for another post soon! :))

part 2 / part 3

[live-laugh-neteyam]

The Moon ||| neteyam x human!reader

masterlist

epilogue

pairings: neteyam x human!fem!reader

summary: neteyam would give you the moon if he could

words: 8.8k (I’m dead omg)

warnings/notes: friends to lovers, major ANGST (cried while writing this one) bits of fluff, implied sexual themes, lovesick!neteyam, mentions of sickness and medical treatments, death, use of y/n, I am not a medical professional so I lot of this is just my interpretation I’m sorry that it won’t be accurate pls don’t hate me, mentions of mates, spider is your adoptive brother (in this house we love spider 🫶🏻), and of course my corny writing, this is the product of me listening to moon song on a loop not sure how this happened, This is gonna be rough apologies in advance

The first time Neteyam saw you was when he was eight years old. He was used to seeing Spider around, but not you. You were new.

Trembling behind Spider it looked like you were trying to disappear. Barely peeking up over his shoulder to look. Neteyam's tail swished in curiosity as he observed you.

"Guys, this is Y/N." Spider introduced you while pushing you forward. "She's a little shy." He added.

Your big eyes looked up at the Na'vi children who towered over you. "Hi." You whispered with an awkward smile and a small wave. "You're really tall." You giggled.

Neteyam stared at you in awe immediately infatuated with you. You were unlike any sky person he had ever seen.

"You're just really short." Lo'ak snapped back rolling his eyes.

Neteyam noticed your smile falter and shoved his brother. Your smile was beautiful, the prettiest thing the young boy had ever seen. At that moment Neteyam decided you should always be smiling.

Spider explained to the group that you were born here like him. You had never left the lab before. This was the first time you saw the beauty of the forest and the first time you saw a Na'vi in the flesh. You were in awe of everything around you.

Spending the rest of the day playing with the other children you couldn't help but get distracted by your surroundings. The forest was alive it's beauty glowing all around you. You had the urge to explore every last inch of it.

Neteyam kept his eyes locked on you. He was worried that you'd get separated from the rest of them. You were small and delicate, unable to properly protect yourself, so Neteyam decided to protect you.

So that's how it was whenever you played with the Sully children. Neteyam always glued by your side. He couldn't explain it. The way he felt an immediate draw towards you. As if the two of you were meant to find each other.

Neytiri was less than thrilled to have another human child around her kids. One was bad enough. After everything humans had done to their home -to her - she despised them. She even had her doubts about the loyal few who stayed.

What made her even more unsure of you was the way her eldest son never left your side. Ever since Spider introduced you Neteyam was glued to your side. Had it been anyone else Neytiri would have found it endearing. But you were human. You were a demon.

A few years later Neytiri started to notice things about you. The way the forest left you in awe no matter how many times you’d seen it. She'd catch you gasping in excitement over the littlest things. It was as if you could see.

She also noticed the strong bond you had with her children, especially with Neteyam. She knew her son well. Neytiri was well aware of how he felt towards you. She feared the day that he realized his own feelings.

You were sitting in the forest with Neteyam next to you. His mother was across from the two of you. Neytiri was shooting daggers with her eyes at you. The stare made you shift uncomfortably. Neteyam picked up on it placing a gentle hand on your knee.

Neytiri observed how you immediately relaxed. The sweet genuine smiled you gave her son and how he gave you one of his own.

Neytiri had been trying to give Neteyam a lesson on arrow making. He had insisted that you join them since he promised to spend the afternoon with you. Much to her dismay, you were here unintentionally distracting him.

You felt something barely grace your shoulder. Figuring it was Neteyam you didn't pay it much mind. Then another tap on your head. One on your arm. Then your other shoulder.

Looking up, you met Neytiri's eyes. She was staring at you like she had seen a ghost. Starting to feel panicked you looked at your arms. You gasped as your eyes filled with wonder.

Several atokirina' floated around you. They danced up and down gently resting on you. Neteyam had the biggest smile on his face. To him it was confirmation the great mother saw you the way he did.

It was undoubtedly a sign from Eywa herself. Neytiri couldn't believe her eyes. Feeling a sense of déjà vu, she was brought back to the first time she met her mate.

Unable to shake what she had witnessed she went to her mother. After explaining the strange encounter Neytiri waited while Mo’at consulted with Eywa.

“Eywa sees the child.” Mo’at finally spoke. “The Great Mother has declared that she will spend the rest of her life by Neteyam.”

Neytiri couldn’t wrap her mind around it. The concept was so foreign to her. Eywa had accepted you as one of her own. Not only that, it was also her will that you stay by Neteyam. Neytiri would never question the will of Eywa. While she didn’t fully understand it she would have to learn to be okay with it.

From that day on, Neteyam’s mother treated you with a kindness she never had before. You didn’t know what happened for her to finally warm up to you but you were forever grateful she did.

Years went by and it was time for Neteyam to begin training for his iknimaya. You were so excited for him, knowing how important this rite of passage was to the Na'vi. There was a part of you that was downcast as he wouldn't be able to spend time with you every day like he usually does.

Your heart hurt because all you wanted was to be able to experience this with him. For as long as you could remember you wanted to be Na'vi. It was your birthday wish every year though you never told anyone out of embarrassment. That and it wouldn't come true if you told.

You and your brother had begged for avatars for years. Unfortunately the materials and funding needed just wasn’t there. Norm and Max wanted nothing more than to be able to grant your wishes, but it just wasn't a possibility.

"So how long are you going to be gone this time?"

Neteyam sighed. He could hear the disappointment in your voice and it broke his heart. "A month. Maybe two."

You felt like you could burst into tears right then and there. Neteyam was your best friend, not to mention your crush for as long as you could remember. You couldn't imagine not seeing him for that long.

"I'll be back before you know it." Gently he brushed hair out of your face. As much as he loved seeing you in the forest he treasured the moments in your room without your mask. Neteyam loved to see your face without the glass restricting his view.

"Don't forget about me." You playfully pushed him.

He gasped in mock offense. "I could never." He smiled. Before he could stop himself he placed a kiss on your forehead.

Stopping dead in his tracks he pulled back. The pair of you stilled blushes adoring both of your cheeks.

Neteyam tried to burry his feelings for you but it was impossible. He had fallen helplessly in love with his best friend. Not caring that you were human he couldn't deny his feelings. He just wasn't sure how to tell you.

Before you knew it, you were throwing your arms around him as you hugged him goodbye. You went to pull away but he kept you in his embrace for a little longer.

"I'm gonna miss you." He sighed.

"You're going to have so much fun you won't even think about me."

"That's not true you're always on my mind." He blushed.

A blush engulfed your face and you bit your lip. You noticed Neteyam's tail swishing back and forth. Looking up at him he was smiling back at you. His cheeks were slightly tinted.

Standing back with the rest of his family you waved as he joined the other young warriors. "He'll be back before you know it." Spider smiled knowingly at you.

No matter how hard you tried you couldn't keep your crush from your bother. He immediately figured it out. Little did you know most everyone had figured it out. The only ones who hadn't were you and Neteyam.

Neytiri watched you with a smile on her face. As time passed she accepted the idea of you with her son. Finding amusement in the two of you pining after each other.

The time without Neteyam dragged on for what felt like an eternity. Spider did his best to keep you occupied as did the Sully siblings. But your mind never strayed far from the boy your heart beat for.

You were getting ready for bed after a long day. Neteyam was halfway through his training by now. You had been counting down the days to his return.

A knock on your door interrupted your thoughts. Norm stood awkwardly in the doorway. “You have a visitor.” He informed you.

Furrowing your eyebrows you looked at him confused. It was way past the curfew set for the lab. “Who?”

Before he could answer you Lo’ak pushed passed him and entered your room. He look frustrated and exhausted.

“What are you doing here Lo’ak?” You asked afraid that something was wrong.

Without saying a word he removed the communicator from his neck and handed it to you. “This is for you.” Was all he said.

You looked over the tech not understanding why he was giving it to you especially now of all times. “I’ve been trying to sleep for hours. He won’t leave me alone until he speaks with you.”

Your face lit up knowing exactly who he was. Wasting no time you pressed the button. “Neteyam?” You hesitantly asked.

“Oh Eywa how I’ve missed your voice.” Neteyam’s voice rang through the speaker.

“Yeah I’m not staying to listen to this.” Lo’ak deadpanned before leaving.

Neteyam missed you terribly and begged his father to let him speak with you. Jake felt like it would be a distraction so he didn't allow it. So Neteyam came up with the brilliant idea to pester his little brother until he gave it. It worked rather quickly.

You spent the whole night talking to Neteyam. He told you all about his training not sparing a single detail. He was more interested in what you had been up to. He just wanted to hear your voice.

The day Neteyam was to return was finally here. You and Spider sprinted through the forest heading towards the village. By the time you got there he had already returned.

Searching the crowd you finally saw him. Knees weak your breath caught in your throat. Somehow he looked taller. His mussels were more defined, shoulders wider, and his face sharper. He was no longer a boy. He looked like a man.

You had always wanted Neteyam but this was different. In that moment your want for him was something you hadn't experienced before. It almost felt wrong. Almost.

Neteyam searched the crowd for you. Eyes glancing over a figure that was familiar he did a double take. It was you. You looked different.

Neteyam gulped as he took in your new features. Your hips wider and chest fuller you no longer looked like the little kid everyone was so used to. Neteyam noticed your hair was shorter, resting at just below your shoulders now.

You were beautiful. Absolutely breathtaking. A gift from Eywa herself. A primal urge came over him, a desire to take you right then and there. You were to be his mate, he felt that you were destined.

"Neteyam!" You squealed running into his arms. He picked you up twirling you in the air like you weighed nothing.

"I missed you Ma'Y/N." He snuggled his face into your neck.

You bit your lip at the pet name. It was usually reserved for mated couples but Neteyam couldn't help but let it slip.

As the weeks passed on the attraction between the two of was stronger than ever. Stolen glances and intentional accidental touches filled your days.

After Neteyam successfully claimed his Ikran earning his spot among the people he would take you for rides.

"I knew you could do it. I'm so proud of you." You looked up at him.

The look you gave him made his heart flutter. A strange satisfaction overcame him knowing that you were proud of him. He wanted you to be proud of him.

That night he walked you back to the lab following you to your room. He desperately needed to speak with you. He had been working up the courage all night.

Neteyam sat next to you on your bed. He loved the moments you shared without your mask in the way. Staring into your eyes without anything in front of them.

"I have earned my place among the people." He said suddenly.

You nodded slowly not sure where he was going with this. "I know I was there." You giggled.

"I may now chose a mate."

Your heart dropped. So this was why he wanted to talk. He was here to tell you that he found someone. He probably wanted you to leave him alone now.

Anxiety flooded your mind as you felt stupid. A part of you actually thought he liked you back. Why would he? You weren’t even the same species. You had nothing to offer him.

“I see.” You gave your best fake smile. “Who’s the lucky girl then?” You had to know.

“You.” Neteyam said without hesitation.

“I’m sorry what?” You asked. There was no way you heard that right.

“You, if you’ll have me.” He looked away shy. He took your confusion as rejection. “I want you to be my mate Y/N.”

“Are you sure?” You asked dumbfounded.

Neteyam cupped your face in his palms. “I see you Y/N.”

Your heart sped up at the phrase you found so beautiful and so terrifying at the same time. He saw you. Every broken piece, every imperfection, all of your good qualities as well as the bad ones, and he still wanted you anyways.

He wanted you despite it all. Neteyam saw you.

“I am human Neteyam.” You said. You needed him to be sure of his choice. Na’vi mate for Life. Of course you wanted to spend the rest of your life with him, but you needed to be sure he wouldn’t regret it.

“I know. That changes nothing.”

“I cannot make Tsaheylu.” The bond was the building block of life on Pandora. It was vital to their existence. They bonded with their mates, you would be unable to bond with him in this way.

“I know. But I see you anyways.” He confessed.

“I’ll never be tsahík.”

“None of that matters to me Y/N. Stop trying to give me reasons to not want you. It won’t work.”

Looking down in shame you gave him one last reason. “I can’t give you children Neteyam. You’d be making so many sacrifices just to have me. It’s not an equal trade.”

“That’s where you’re wrong.” He smiled. “You are all I want. It’s always been you Y/N. Always. Nothing else matters when you are enough for me.”

Neteyam leaned in as if he was about to kiss you. “You are what I want Y/N.”

“You are what I want too.” You breathed. “I see you Neteyam.

That was all he needed to hear. He crashed his lips onto yours passionately kissing you. Lips moving in sync until you pulled away to catch your breath.

Staring into his golden eyes you removed your shirt leaving your chest bare before him. Neteyam’s eyes widened at your sudden action. He wasn’t expecting anything to happen, he was happy with kissing.

“We don’t have to do anything Ma’Y/N.”

There was that name again. You smiled. “I want to. I want you Neteyam. That is, if you’ll have me.” You batted your eyelashes at him.

His tail twitched in excitement before he tackled you back onto the bed. The two of you spent the night a tangled mess of limbs. “We are mated before Eywa for life.” Neteyam whispered into your ear before you drifted off into a peaceful sleep.

It had been two years since you mated with Neteyam. It had been the best years of your life.

His family was immediately accepting of your relationship. To your surprise so was most of the clan. There were a few that frowned upon your union but Neteyam made sure to put them in their place.

Following Neteyam’s lead you ran through the forest. He made sure to keep looking back for you so the two of you wouldn’t get separated.

“So where are we going again?” You huffed out of breath.

“It’s a surprise.” He smiled back at you.

Neteyam took you to a clearing that had the most beautiful flowers you had ever seen. You were fascinated by the nature of Pandora.

“I wish I could smell them.” You sighed. Always longing to smell the fresh air and to feel the breeze on your face.

Neteyam frowned at your words. He too hated your mask, but it kept you alive. It allowed him to show you his home. To Neteyam it was worth the inconvenience.

“Come on, let’s keep going.” He smiled. “There’s something else I wanna show you.”

Without a second thought you followed him. Starting to feel faint you slowed down. Everything was getting blurry and your head was woozy.

"Neteyam, could you slow down a little?" You panted, pushing your hand against a tree for support. "I'm a little dizzy."

Stopping dead in his tracks he rushed over to you. His mind racing with a million different thoughts. His heart screaming at him to protect you. Not looking good at all your face had gone pale. Your eyes looked exhausted. You looked ill.

"I will take you to my grandmother. You do not look good Ma'Y/N."

"I'm fine Teyam." You attempted a smile to reassure him. The last thing you wanted was to be rushed into the village. The People were used to you, but having the Tsahík tend to a sky demon may be pushing your luck. "Just take me back to the lab please."

Scooping you up he held you close to his chest bridal style. "Neteyam, I could've walked. I'm not broken." You rolled your eyes. Ignoring your protests he continued the trek back to the lab. Something was wrong and you were unwell.

Gently setting you down at the lab entrance he insisted that he come in with you. Neteyam was still slightly unsure of sky people, the lab making him nervous. But this was different. Anxiety consumed him and he couldn't leave without making sure you were okay.

Taking your mask off you then offered Neteyam a mask of his own. He hastily took it eyes never leaving you. The last thing on his mind was a mask for himself. He could breath this air for hours anyways.

Walking the familiar hallways to your room he observed your small steps. Gently panting as if the walk was tiring you out. You insisted you were fine but your body language said otherwise.

Plopping down on your bed you made grabby hands reaching out for him. "Cuddle me." You playfully commanded. Smiling he complied gently laying down next to you, arms instinctively pulling you closer.

Taking a deep breath letting your scent fill his lungs he hummed. Neteyam gently peppered a few kisses to your face before burying his head in your neck.

"Neteyam stop." You giggled. "It tickles." You could feel his smile against your neck. Running your free hand through his braids you sighed in satisfaction. Moments like this made up for all the bad ones.

You felt so safe in his arms, like he could protect you from anything. And he would. He'd burn the whole world if it meant keeping you safe.

"Teyam?" You whispered fingers still playing with his hair. He hummed in response snuggling closer to you. "I love you to the moon and back."

The expression felt odd rolling off your tongue. Checks heated in a blush you were a bit embarrassed. After all, you found it to be incredibly cheesy. But there was a part of you that found the sentiment sweet.

You'd first read it engraved on a tiny silver necklace. It had belonged to your mother. One of the scientists gave it to you once you were older. It was the only thing you had of her. Everything else was left up to your imagination.

For years they tried to allude to the fact that your mother had passed away. It seemed easier to let you believe that than tell you the truth. But even though you were a child you weren't clueless. You knew that your mother had left you here.

Terrified of everything that had happened she went back to earth unable to take you with her. That's how you found yourself being raised by the scientists on Pandora with Spider as your honorary brother.

A small part of you cling to the saying. Wishing it was true, that your mother loved you to the moon and back - to Pandora and back. That one day she'd be back for you.

You knew it would never happen. So instead you say it to Neteyam.  Because you truly meant it. You would go to the moon and back for him. And you would be back. You'd always come back for him.

Neteyam's ears perked up at your words. It wasn't the first time you had told him you loved him but you had never said it like this. He didn't entirely understand it but he appreciated your words just the same.

Smiling at you like you were the most precious thing he ever laid his eyes on. "I will give you the moon my love."

Laughing you pulled him closer. "You can't give someone the moon Neteyam."

But he would for you. You were his moon, his stars, and everything in between. Whatever you asked for he would deliver. "If I could give you the moon, I would give you the moon." He confirmed.

"You're a dork." You giggled.

"So are you then. You started it." He playfully fired back. Neteyam's mind turned somber for a moment. "Are you feeling better?"

You nodded cuddling more into your mattress to get comfy. "Much better. I think I need more cuddles to be one hundred percent though."

Smiling, Neteyam snuggled into you. "I'm more than happy to assist."

As the weeks went by you continued to feel strange. It didn’t seem like a big deal to you, so you didn’t want to bring it up. After all, you were human. Getting sick was a part of every day life.

No one noticed how you were acting strange. Except Neteyam of course. He picked up on the way you always seemed tired. The way your eyes looked a bit dull as they stared off into space. No matter how hard you tried to hide it, he saw it all.

You were now having trouble keeping your meals down. Stomach always feeling like it was in knots you didn’t know what was wrong. No one had caught you throwing up yet, but they did start to notice how you were losing weight without trying.

Norm awkwardly tried to broach the subject as always trying to be the father you never had. He was afraid you were doing something self inflicted and wanted to support you in any way he could.

It took awhile but you were able to convince him it wasn't what he thought. You honestly didn't know what was wrong, you just one day started feeling sick.

Norm being the man of science that he was immediately wanted to start tests to get to the bottom of what was wrong. Somehow you managed to get him to hold off for awhile. The idea of going through a bunch of tests scared you.

You didn’t get out of it for very long. Neteyam was worried sick about you and insisted you do whatever was needed to get better. Reluctantly you agreed spending the next several days undergoing tests and blood work.

Neteyam even took you to his grandmother for her guidance. She wasn’t able to pinpoint what was wrong. Whatever you had was a human sickness, unknown to the Na’vi.

Jake took a special interest in what was wrong. He was once a human himself. He was well aware of everything that could go wrong with the human body. Plus he deeply cared for his daughter in law. Jake consulted with Norm regularly regarding his findings.

The Olo'eyktan thought it’d be best if he was one of the first to find out. That way he would be able to explain it to his family better. He was by no means a doctor but he knew his son would trust his words more than Norm’s.

He could see the way Neteyam looked like his was close to having a melt down. He had a forced calmness about him. As if he was in complete denial that something might be wrong. Because he was. If he refused to acknowledge it, it wouldn’t be real.

"Leukemia." Norm spoke like that one simple word explained everything. Jake's breath caught in his throat at the word. Neteyam stood head moving back and forth between the two of them, waiting for an explanation.

His heart hammered in his chest as they spoke words that meant nothing to him. Human words he didn't know. "How long?" His father asked quietly.

"It's progressed rather quickly. She had been exhibiting symptoms for a few months now. It's hard to say how long she's had it."

Neteyam knew they were talking about you. Dread filled him and he felt sick to his stomach. The feeling of being left in the dark was too much for him, he felt like he could scream.

"How long does she have?" Jake asked again eyes screwed onto Norm. He spoke hushed this time. Jake wasn't a fool. He was well aware of his son's feelings towards you. In fact, the whole clan knew.

How long does she have? The words echoed in Neteyam's brain. Repeating over and over again. They couldn't be talking about your life could they? You were just a little sick, you had said so yourself. This couldn't be real he refused to believe it.

"I've estimated three years." Max spoke up. "She has a thirty percent chance."

Thirty. That was low wasn't it? There was no possible way you'd have such a low chance. The science geeks were the best of the best. You'd also have access to the remedies of the Na'vi. Most importantly you'd have Neteyam. He made a vow to take care of and protect you. He indented to keep that vow.

"What are her opinions? What can we do?" Jake needed all the information he could get if he was going to have to explain this to his son.

"Chemo would be the next step. It's going to be hard, she's already so weak. It's going to take a lot out of her."

Jake glanced over at his son. Neteyam looked like he was on the verge of a panic attack. Hell, he was on the verge of a panic attack. His eyes were wide as he stared at his father, pleading for an answer.

Jake sighed, "Would she have a better chance back on Earth? Can we even give her proper care here?"

Earth? You couldn't go to earth. Neteyam refused to allow it. If you left he'd never see you again. He wouldn't be able to care for you while you're sick. He also wouldn't know how you were doing - he wouldn't know if you were still breathing or not.

His mouth hung open as his brain tried to register this. "She can't go to earth dad." He said just above a whisper. "She can't go!" He said again this time yelling desperately at his father.

"Calm down boy." Jake hushed him placing a hand on his shoulder. "Let them speak."

"She's not going anywhere." Norm said trying to choose his words carefully. "Her immune system is weak right now. I don't think she would survive the trip. I think it's best to treat her here with what we have available."

Tears stung Neteyam's eyes as he stared at the ground. You were so sick you wouldn't survive the trip to earth. Would you even survive here? He came to the horrific realization that you were sick and you might be dying.

"She's strong though." Jake said more so to his son. "She can fight this."

Max and Norm looked at each other with sad smiles. Neither doubted your strength, you were one of the strongest people they knew. But this was different. They had to entertain the possibility that even if you fight with your all you could lose. They also knew that they didn't have everything needed to properly treat you. But for the sake of the broken boy in front of them they left that part out.

Staying positive was hard but you gave it your best try. You felt weak but it wasn’t insufferable yet. The worst part of it was you couldn’t go out exploring like you were accustomed to.

Your friends made sure to keep you company. Your room become the unofficial official hangout spot. Lo’ak and Spider would play games with you, Kiri kept you up to date on all of the gossip in the village, Tuk insisted that the two of you color, and Neteyam? Neteyam never left your side.

He was there not long after your woke up and often times he stayed the night. Neteyam never wanted to leave your side, wanting to make sure you were cared for in any way possible. He would be there every step of the way.

When it was time for chemo you felt extremely anxious. As Norm prepared the IV Neteyam eyed the needle untrustworthily. You winced as it went into your arm. Neteyam hissed ready to throw Norm across the room for causing you pain.

Norm panicked and you quickly explained to Neteyam that it was okay. It only hurt for a few minutes. You had to deal with it. You needed the treatment to get better.

Neteyam cuddled up next to you holding your hand. He tried to do things to distract you from it. The pair of you would watch movies from back on earth. You taught him how to play uno. He could never beat you and it frustrated him to no end. He was close to throwing his cards in anger. Seeing him be such a sore looser made you laugh.

Neteyam loved your laugh. He didn’t hear it much anymore so it was his life’s mission to make you laugh as much as he could.

He believed you’d make a full recovery. This was simply a bump in the road.

"Please don't let him in." You pleaded with Spider. "I don't want him to see me like this." Tears were stinging your eyes now.

Spider looked sympathetically at you. You tried so hard to be strong for everyone but it was wearing down on you. This was effecting you worse than you thought it would. All you wanted to sulk in your room by yourself.

"He's freaking out Y/N. I'm afraid he's gonna start breaking stuff." He chuckled. Gently placing his hand on your shoulder his concerned look returned. "He cares about you. A lot. He just wants to make sure you're okay."

Nodding your head you wiped your face with your hands. You didn't want him to see that you had been crying. "Okay. Let him in."

Spider went off to find Neteyam it didn't take him too long thanks to the commotion he was causing. "You cannot keep me here!" Neteyam bellowed.

He tried to moved around the crowd of scientists who were attempting to keep him back. Neteyam growled in frustration. "Y/N is my mate you cannot keep me from her."

"Bro, calm down!" Spider yelled as Neteyam went to throw something off of a desk. He stopped as soon as he heard Spider. Neteyam's shoulders relaxed slightly at the familiar face.

"They are trying to keep me away." He snapped.

"Yeah I can see that." Spider huffed. "If you're done with your temper tantrum Y/N is ready to see you."

Raising his head high Neteyam walked past the scientists smugly. When out of earshot he bent down to Spider "They said Y/N did not want to see me." His face etched with worry.

Sighing Spider ran his hand over his face. "She's upset right now. It's not my place to say. She needs to be the one to tell you. But she's upset and embarrassed right now. She didn't want you to see her like that."

Neteyam's heart clenched at his words. The thought of you being so upset that you didn't want to see him crushed him. Walking into your room he was preparing for the worst.

You were sitting in your bed with your hands folded in your lap. Staring down you were avoiding his gaze.

He looked you up and down to see if their was any visible signs of what was wrong. If there was a problem Neteyam wanted to attack it head on. Your sickness wasn't like that though. He had to sit and watch helplessly as you suffered. It consumed him to the point he lived in constant agony.

Nothing seemed out of the ordinary. Except your eyes were red and puffy like you had been crying. You were crying. Why were you crying? Neteyam's protective side took the forefront once again, ready to crush whatever had upset you.

Rushing to your side he cupped your cheek with his hand. "Ma'love what's wrong?" Worried etched on his face.

"You can have these back. I don't need them anymore." You sniffed. Your closed hands reached out to his. Opening your hands you gently poured the contents into his.

Neteyam stilled as his beads spilled into his hands. They were the beads he had given to you. He loved seeing you proudly wearing them in your hair, letting everyone see you were his.

"You don't want them anymore?" He softly asked. It felt like a punch to the gut. It was as if you were rejecting him.

"I won't be able to wear them anymore Neteyam." Meeting his gaze your heart broke seeing his face. He didn't understand why you were returning his gift to you.

"My hair is falling out Neteyam." You sighed.

"I do not understand." His brow furrowed trying to put the pieces together.

"The chemo- the medicine makes my hair fall out." You tried to explain.

Spider walked over and put his hand on your shoulder for support. He viewed you as his little sister. It hurt him to see you suffering like this.

Neteyam didn't understand how this medicine was helping you if it was making it so hard on you. Human medicine was more complicated than the Na'vi remedies he was used to.

You knew that he was genuinely curious and just trying to understand but you were tired if talking about it. You knew you would eventually lose your hair but you thought you could handle it.

Everything was too much. You hadn't really felt sick until now. When you noticed your hair coming out in clumps it all became real. You were sick.

Spider found you in a fit of sobs. It broke his heart to see you like that. It also sent him into a panic. He didn't know what to do to make you feel better. He was your big brother, he was supposed to know everything.

"Norm gave me this." Sighing you pulled out hair clippers. "He said it might be easier to just go ahead and shave my head." Tears stung your eyes again. "I just don't know if I can."

Without thinking Spider took the clippers from you. "I'll go first." He declared.

Eyes widening in panic you tried to stop him. "Wait Spider! You don't have to do that." Before you could get another word out he turned them on and quickly swiped along the top of his head.

You and Neteyam stared at him with wide eyes. Dumbfounded you couldn't believe your brother just did that. He did it for you. You couldn't help the small smile that formed. Knowing that your brother loved you that much made your heart swell.

"Are you guys just gonna stare at me or are you gonna help me finish this up?" Spider asked with a smirk.

Once finished Spider was almost unrecognizable. "I can't believe you did that." You mumble as he helped you with your hair.

"It's not a big deal." He shrugged. "It was weighing me down anyways. I'll be faster now."

You rolled your eyes at your brother's odd logic. Neteyam was holding onto your hand watching Spider like a hawk. The idea of taking a blade to your head terrified him even though you assured him it was safe.

Gently you squeezed his hand. “I’m okay.” You assured him. He nodded bringing your hand up to his lips, tenderly kissing your knuckles. “I love you.” His whispered lips still pressed to your fingers.

Usually you stuck to the Na’vi terms of affection. It was what Neteyam was comfortable with. But after learning what the human phrase meant he had to use it. Because it was true. He loved you with every fiber of his being.

Tugging his hand to your lips you gave his knuckles a matching kiss. “I love you too. So so much.”

“Come on guys knock it off.” Spider complained pretending to be sick. As much as your constant shows of affection annoyed him he was glad you found someone who truly loved you.

The next day Neteyam came to visit you with his hands behind his back. You eyed him suspiciously, he was never good at keeping secrets from you.

“I made this for you last night.” He gently placed a bracelet in your lap. You gasped when you realized it was made of the beads he had originally given you for your hair.

“You said you couldn’t wear them anymore and now that’s not true.”

Carefully you put the bracelet on. Heart bursting at the sweet gesture tears began to spill from your eyes. Neteyam started to panic thinking be did something wrong.

“You are not happy with it?” He asked defeated. “You are crying.”

“Yes but they’re happy tears. I love it Neteyam. I love you.” You threw your arms around his neck. Smiling he pulled you closer into his chest.

“Oel ngati kameie.” He whispered into your neck.

“I see you Ma’Teyam.”

"I'm dying Neteyam." You said without any hesitation or emotion.

Neteyam immediately sat up looking to you slightly begging that he heard you wrong. It couldn't be true. It couldn't be.

"No one's told you because they're afraid of how you'll react. I don't want to keep anything from you. Love you too much to do that." Your eyes met his through your mask. He felt his heart breaking not only from your words but your eyes. They were faded, lacking the light he loved so much.

"They didn't want to tell me either." Your hoarse voice kept on. "But it's hard to pull a fast one over on me when I'm like this." Chuckling at yourself Neteyam caught a glimpse of you. The real you. Not this pitiful shell of who you once were.

"The treatment stopped working months ago. They told me last week."

Bringing your hand to his mouth he gently kissed your knuckles. "Please do not say such things." His voice cracked. Tears were now freely flowing from his eyes.

Deep down in his heart he knew he was losing you. He just didn't want to believe it. He couldn't believe it. Acknowledging it made it feel real and there was no way this was real. It had to be a cruel nightmare.

"I'm tired Neteyam." You spoke quietly.

Unsure of what you meant he was ready to scoop you up and tuck you into bed. Somehow you had convinced him to go star gazing tonight. It had seemed like the perfect date night idea since you were always cooped up in your room. But now he kicked himself for allowing you to leave.

"Let's get you back then," he started shuffling."

"No Neteyam." You interrupted him stopping him in his tracks. "I'm tired of this." You gestured to yourself. "I'm tired of treatments that aren't working. Tired of being stuck in my room all day. Im tired of it all." You sighed.

"This isn't living Neteyam. It's waiting to die." Meeting his eyes your heart sank. He was finally registering your words. Neteyam looked at you like you had just pierced his heart with an arrow. "I'm tired of waiting."

You had been battling this for over a year now. It had taken its toll on you physically and emotionally. You didn’t know how much longer you could go on like this.

"What are you saying Y/N?" He asked trying his best to stay calm but miserably failing. His hands were shaking and his heart quickened.

"I asked Norm and Max about how I could speed it up."

Neteyam heard his heart shatter into a million pieces. You wanted to end your life. You wanted to leave him. You couldn't possibly want to leave him could you?

Tears were freely falling from his eyes. His body started to shake fighting off sobs.

"I'm not getting any better Neteyam." You gently placed your hand on his cheek wiping away his tears with your thumb.

This wasn't what you wanted but you saw no other way. Everyday was a struggle, even breathing hurt. You wanted Neteyam to see what you already accepted. This was a waiting game. You were never going to recover.

"No." He violently shook his head holding you to his chest. "No. You'll get better. We just need to try something else. Please." He begged.

"Ma'Teyam there's nothing left to try."

"Please. You can't leave me." His body shook with sobs. "I can't lose you Ma'Y/N."

You couldn't fight back your own tears. Your mask was fogging as you started to cry. Seeing your mate like this was as painful as your sickness.

"You're not gonna lose me love. Nothing is ever lost, remember?" You tried your best to comfort him.

"There has to be something we can try." He sobbed. "What about an avatar?"

You held his head in your chest while he cried. "They can't make anymore avatars. You know that."

"I can't do this without you. There has to be something." Neteyam wailed.

The sight broke your heart. You had exhausted all of your options. Everyone but Neteyam seemed to recognize it.

"I won't do anything without your blessing Ma'Teyam." You gently caressed his head. "But please try to understand my point of view."

"You cannot ask this of me. I can't." He shook his head.

Gently rocking you soothed the boy in your arms. He had a vice like grip on you as if you'd vanish into thin air. "It'll okay Ma'Teyam." You cooed.

You had informed Norm and Max of your plan. It broke their heart but they acknowledged that it was your decision. They would respect your wishes.

Norm found himself in your room in the middle of the night watching you sleep. It pained him to see your labored breaths. You were always so fill of light and now you looked like a hollow shell.

He'd known you your whole life. It broke his heart to know that your time was running out. It seemed like just yesterday you were a bubbly toddler getting into trouble in the lab.

You told Jake and Neytiri next. For some reason you were terrified of what your in laws would think of you. While this was something common amongst humans it was very rare to the Na'vi.

Jake was once human though. It hurt his heart to see that it came to this but he understood. While his disability wasn't terminal he knew the feeling of hopelessness. The feeling of being trapped inside what once was you. Your body becoming a prison. Jake knew better than anyone.

Neytiri didn't understand why you wished this until she saw you. She couldn't contain her gasp. No longer the child she has grown to care for, you were someone she didn’t recognize.

Smiling weakly at her Neytiri’s heart broke for you. She could see that you were dying but she couldn’t understand why. It was the great mother’s will that you would stay with Neteyam. Why would she allow you to die so soon?

Then it hit her. The words of her mother. You would spend the rest of your life beside Neteyam. Your life would end before his. Seeing you like this made her realize why you wanted this. You weren’t yourself, you were tapped inside a body that was failing you.

Spider was unusually quiet when you told him. “Spider please say something.” You pleaded.

He knew it was coming. He’d be a fool not to. But he was like everyone else who loved you, he didn’t want to believe it was happening. All of his earliest memories included you. You may have only been siblings because of circumstance but he loved you like you were blood.

You were undoubtedly his sister. Always there for him for as long as he could remember. Someone who always had his back. You understood the feeling of being abandoned here and the longing of wanting more. You were his person. And now you weren’t going to be here anymore.

Spider stood up and hugged you. He was slightly crying into your shoulder. You had never seen your big brother cry. He was your rock always strong and dependable.

“I’m sorry Spider.” You cried with him.

“Hey,” he pulled back to look at you. “Don’t ever be sorry. None of this is your fault.”

Nodding through your tears you took in the sight of him. His hair was growing back so fast leaving him with a nice short cut.

“You know I love you right?” He asked unsure for a moment. He had to make sure you knew. Spider wouldn’t be able to live with himself If you didn’t.

“Of course. I love you too bro.”

The two of you spent the rest of the day talking about everything and nothing all at once. It would be one of the last times you got to.

When it came to telling Neteyam he already knew. Your confirmation was like stones in his heart. But he knew. Deep down he always knew. You were never getting better.

Being cooped up in your room wasn't much of a life. You were in pain and it pained him to witness it. Neteyam never wished to part from you but this wasn't his choice to make.

He knew that had there been any other way you wouldn't had made the choice either.

You wanted one last day. One last good day.

Looking at your room one last time you shut the door. You had breakfast with Norm and Spider just like you always did growing up. Max even joined you.

No one talked about what was to come. You forbid any talk of the future only wanted to live in the here and now.

Spider helped you put on your mask and the two of you slowly made your way to the village. He helped you into the Sully home. You were terrified of everyone being somber, but to your delight everyone acted as normal.

You hadn’t laughed this much in months watching Spider reenact a story of one of the many times Lo’ak almost got himself killed.

Laughter, hugs, and smiles was how you spent your time with the Sully’s. It was perfect just like it always was. Neteyam kept you sat on his lap not wanting to lose contact for a second.

Taking a deep breath he inhaled your scent. It had changed when you got sick. It didn’t smell like you. It made him frown.

Insisting on going on an Ikran ride you drug Neteyam out of his family’s tent. Neytiri stopped you before you got too far. Embracing you one last time. “Thank you for watching over him my child.” Before you could say a word she kissed your forehead and left you with watery eyes.

Neteyam didn’t want to focus on sadness right now. You were still here that’s all that mattered. Taking your hand once again you were greeted with his Ikran.

“You sure you feel up to this?” He checked in.

“Hell yeah.” You smirked at him.

Flying through air was a feeling you’d never get used to. Up there you were truly free. Sticking your arms out to intensify the feeling Neteyam cursed at your sudden movement. His grip tightening around you.

“Let me know before you do something like that.” He scolded.

“You worry too much!” You yelled over the wind. “You’ve taken me on a million rides and haven’t dropped me yet.”

Neteyam smiled at you. Today you were glowing with a glimpse of yourself. Not the person who had been while sick. The real you. It made his heart clench. It pained him but he knew you were right. This was the right choice.

He would rather see you like this than just slowly waste away to nothing. I wanna go out with a bang. You had told him.

Eclipse crept up on the couple as you laid on the ground tangled up in each other. "I love you so much." You told him tears threatening to spill. He kissed your knuckles. "I love you to the moon and back." He whispered.

Smiling fondly at the memory from what felt like an entirety ago. "I can't believe you remember that." You laughed.

He chuckled. Neteyam had spent years committing every part of you to memory. He found your surprise amusing. Of course he’d remember. He remembered it all.

You stayed in his embrace until you couldn't keep your eyes open any longer. "I'm ready Neteyam." You breathed.

He nodded blinking back tears. "I see you Ma'Y/N." He gently caressed your face the best he could.

"I see you Ma'Teyam." You grabbed his hand. "Don't worry I'll see you again. Take your time my love."

"Anything for you my moon." He smiled.

As gently as he could he removed your mask. Taking a deep breath in you smiled as you inhaled the scents of the forest. It smelt even better than you imagined.

Neteyam laid next to you holding your hand looking up to the sky. You admired the stars before glancing over at Neteyam. He met your eyes and smiled. Your breathes were started to become labored. "It's okay love. You can rest now." He said fighting back a sob.

Your vision was turning black around the edges. Neteyam was talking to you but you couldn’t register what he was saying. Slowly your eyes closed. Your chest stopped. Just like that you were gone.

This was exactly how you asked. Neteyam fulfilled every last one of your wishes even if it killed him inside. Your whole life you wanted nothing more than to experience Pandora without any restrictions. And in that brief moment you did.

Neteyam held onto your lifeless body as he sobbed. He knew it was happening but nothing would prepare him for the feeling of you actually being gone.

His love. His mate. His best friend. His moon and stars. Gone forever. You were gone and there was nothing he could do to bring you back.

His body shook as he wailed. Neteyam realized that because you were human you were never connected to the spirit tree. He would never be able to see you again. He would never see you again.

Neteyam spent the whole night grieving you. He knew it was just the beginning of many sleepless nights crying for you.

In the morning he carried you back to home tree. Neteyam insisted that you have a traditional Na’vi burial. It didn’t take much convincing as everyone adored you.

His family helped prepare your body. He begged for help not thinking he was strong enough to do it on his own. Once everything was finished they gave him a moment alone. Spider looked up at him with red puffy eyes giving him a pat on the back.

Neteyam spent his last moment with you whispering sweet nothings that you would never hear. Confessions of love that wouldn’t reach your ears.

The last time Neteyam saw you, you were lowered into the ground. He tried to stay collected not wanting his people to see him weak. But this was unbearable.

After the funeral his grandmother approached him. Pulling him in for a rare hug she caressed his head Lovingly. “She is with Eywa now.” She told him.

He looked up at her in shock. You were a human. Neteyam didn’t think it was possible for a sky person to be with Eywa.

“She is?” He asked breathless.

Mo’at simply nodded before leaving him. Neteyam took a moment to process this revelation. A gentle breeze blew through his hair. Taking a deep breath he tried to ground himself.

A delicate tap on his shoulder caused him to open his eyes. A single atokirina' had landed on him. It gently swayed around him. He cupped the spirit his hands smiling, tears streaming down his cheeks.

You were still here. There is no death. Only change.

[redstarwriting]

protected

hobie brown x o’hara!reader

request?: yes

request: “I know you’re probably busy 🙏🏽 but can I request a hobie x reader Where reader is miguels kid but from another universe and we were known as “dangerous” to the multiverse and miguel had to watch over us and we find out while hanging out with hobie and hobie has to comfort us as we try to process the fact that Miguel wasn’t our real dad and just someone keeping the mutliverse safe?

I really hope this makes sense i just don’t know how to make is make sense uk? 😭 💀”

requested by: @millerworld​

word count: 1.7k

genre: angst with some fluff

Warnings: language, mentions of childbirth death, big feelings of betrayal, probably horrible spanish, honestly a lot of angst

A/N: apologies for the wait for this one! i love writing angst though so i was rubbing my hands together like an evil lil bitch writing this. i apologize if the spanish is wrong/not how it would actually be said/worded. been a minute since i took a spanish course, so i am a little rusty. please enjoy, and thank you so much for requesting, love! :)

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Ever since you remembered your dad, Miguel O’Hara, was there. Of course, there are certain moments of your childhood you don’t remember, as every child has, but your earliest memory is your dad picking you up and soothing you as you cried at two years old. And ever since then, he was always there. Your friends at school would always say you were so lucky that you had a dad that was so devoted to you, and you agreed. To an extent. See, he was very particular about what he allowed you to do. It wasn’t in a negative way, necessarily, he was just protective. His favorite saying and your least favorite saying in your house was ‘I just want what’s best for you, cariño.’

It resulted in you staying home from school events, friend events, and generally any type of event where your safety could have been compromised. It caused you to be a bit of a loner, always hearing about the parties, the gossip, all of it instead of actually experiencing it for yourself.

Of course, it annoyed you.

It still does.

He’s loosened up a bit eventually, though, allowing you to go to work with him. Which also meant you got to meet many spiders. Quite a few of the spider-people quickly became your closest friends, as it was simpler and easier for your dad to keep tabs on you in Spider Society. Much to his chagrin, you quickly became best friends with Hobie Brown. The two of you were around the same age, and since you were annoyed at your dad and in your rebellious era, you got along swimmingly. A little too swimmingly, actually, which Miguel purposefully chose to ignore for the most part. Until he saw Hobie sucking his little one’s face off. Regardless, Hobie was always quick to validate all your conflicted, annoyed, and even positive feelings about your father. He even helped you come out of your shell and rebel against Miguel occasionally.

Miguel didn’t like this very much, but he also knew that Hobie was still a good influence on you. No matter how many times both of you tried to convince him that he wasn’t. But sometimes, Hobie would talk you into doing things that he very much disliked. Hated, even. And this time was one of those times. While he was out, containing a particularly difficult anomaly, Hobie convinced you to search through Miguel’s personal files on his supercomputer because he bet if your birth certificate would be anywhere, it would be there. When you found a folder with your name, you expected to open it to see some family pictures, hoping for your birth certificate with the name of your mom. Your dad never really talked about your mom, just that she passed away during childbirth. You stopped asking because every time you did, he would get very quiet and a guilty look would appear on his face. But you’d be lying if you said you weren’t curious. So you went into this endeavor excited to see what you might find out. Unfortunately, that excitement didn’t last for very long. See when you opened your file expecting these mundane things, that wasn’t what you were met with.

In fact, that was nowhere near what you found.

You found detailed notes all about you.

“What the hell,” you mumble, scrolling through the various pictures of you as an infant, with two adult strangers. Hobie said nothing, looking at all the pictures and skimming the important parts of all the files you were pulling up with a frown on his face. You stop on a specific picture of a woman holding you in a hospital bed. She was smiling.

And she was very much alive.

Tears immediately start to well up in your eyes as Hobie gently pulls your hands away from the computer. “Think that’s enough a’ that, love,” he says softly. You yank your arms away from him. “No.” You scroll to the next photo, seeing a man you’ve never met before holding you in the same hospital room, with the same strange woman right next to him. The next time you scroll, it’s a detailed account from Miguel about who you are. Notes from your dad declaring you a ‘danger’ and that you ‘must be contained somehow.’ Talk of your biological parents, their names, and how you had to be separated from them before ‘irreversible damage was done to the multiverse.’

You stare at the screen, and Hobie pulls your hands away again, successfully this time. He steps between you and the screens, blocking your view and slowly walking you backward and away from the files. You’re too shocked to say anything, the only thing you can do is quietly cry. Hobie opens his mouth to say something when Miguel’s voice rings out. “What do the two of you think you’re doing?”

The two of you turn your heads toward Miguel, and his annoyed frown turns to one of concern as soon as he sees the look on your face. “¿Qué tienes, mi corazón?” Miguel asks, his voice much softer as he approaches you. Hobie moves, positioning himself between you and your ‘father,’ and scoffs. “Think you got some explainin’ to do ‘ere, mate,” Hobie says, and Miguel looks at him confused. Then he sees what’s on the screen. A look of horrified realization spreads across his face, and he looks at you. “(Y/n), cariño, I can explain.”

“Don’t call me that,” your voice, albeit shaky, finally comes back to you. Hobie turns his attention to you, squeezing the hand you’ve been holding onto for dear life ever since he pulled you away from the computer. “(Y/n)—”

“Who am I? Who are you to me?”

“…Please, let me—”

“WHO ARE THOSE PEOPLE?!” you shout, desperately yearning for your dad to say they weren’t what was said in his reports. But all he does is frown. “They’re… they are your biological parents,” he confesses, and you make a choked noise. Hobie subtly begins turning his watch to his universe, ready to make an escape from your dad at any point. “If you just let me explain—”

“I’m a threat to the multiverse?” you choke out through your tears, “What the fuck does that mean, papá?! If I can even call you that.” Miguel’s jaw clenches. “Don’t forget who raised you.”

“How could I?! How could you?! Is this why you never let me do anything?! Too worried your querido bebecito would destroy the fucking multiverse?!”

“(Y/n). I did it to protect everyone.”

“What about me?! Did you ever plan on telling me?! How is separating me from my family protecting me?!” Hobie places an arm around your shoulder, pulling you closer and keeping you shielded by him as Miguel tries to step closer to you. Miguel glares at him, and Hobie glares back. Miguel holds out his hand in a surrendering way. “It was to protect you just as much, if not more, as it was to protect everyone else. If you would just listen—“

“No. No, I’m done listening to you.”

“Cariño—”

“I am not tú cariño. I am not tú corazoón. You are not mi papá,” you say, venom behind your words. You can practically see Miguel’s heart shatter into tiny little pieces.

That was the worst thing you could have ever said to him.

Before he can say anything else, Hobie opens the portal, pulling you through and closing it almost immediately. You find yourself in the familiar atmosphere of his flat. “C’mere, love,” he mumbles, pulling you into his arms. You grip his shirt, sobbing into his chest as he rocks you back and forth, softly shushing you occasionally and rubbing your back. After what feels like hours, but was really maybe a minute, he swiftly picks you up, carrying you bridal style to his bed as you continue to cry into his shirt. He sits down, placing a soft kiss to the top of your head and rubbing up and down your arm. He can’t help but feel guilty for this. If he didn’t convince you to look at the computer…

“Don’t blame yourself, Hobie… please,” you whimper, and he sighs. “Love, you needa stop bein’ so good at knowin’ what i’m thinkin’,” he mumbles, and you look up at him with a soft smile. “Can’t help it. Even your thoughts are loud,” you say, and he snorts. “Chuffed to see the cryin’ made ya feel better,” he says and you shake your head. “I still feel like shit, Hobie,” you whisper, and he frowns. He gently wipes some tears away from your cheeks. “Reckon all ‘at cryin’ has you knackered?” he mumbles, and you nod softly. He lays backwards, maneuvering the two of you to be laying down. The two of you face each other, one of his hands cradling the side of your face while the other soothingly rubs up and down your side. You grip onto his shirt, and he places a soft peck on your nose. “‘m sorry, love,” he says, and you sniffle. “I already told you it isn’t your fault.”

“‘Kay, still feel like it was,” he says, and you sigh. “That’s not important right now,” he mumbles, gently pulling you closer. “What’s important is that I make you feel better.” You look at him, your eyes are still glossy from tears. “Never met someone who looked so stunnin’ when they cry,” he says, gently stroking your cheek. You smile softly, and he does too. “There’s my favorite smile,” he whispers before softly placing his lips on yours. It’s only for a second, but it makes all the pain go away. And you’re grateful for that. Even if it is just for a second. “Get some sleep, love.” He kisses your forehead, tangling his legs with yours and pulling your head into his chest. You relax into him. He was right. The crying was exhausting. Before you know it, you’re asleep as Hobie gently traces shapes into your skin, whispering anything and everything he loves about you to you so softly that if you weren’t really listening, you wouldn’t hear any of it. No one makes you feel protected quite like Hobie does.

And even if it’s just for a moment, thanks to Hobie, you feel like everything will be okay.

───────────────────────────────────

[thestarfishinjootsoffice]

Hey I was thinking of something really cute and I couldn't get it out of my head 😅 what if slashers ( Michael Myers, Jason Voorhees, Thomas Hewitt, Freddy Krueger.) Reaction to child! Reader putting a bandaid on them and kissing it when they get like a scratch or something. My little niece does that to me and I think it's so cute 🥹

AHH MY REQUEST IS SUCH A MESS RN BUT THIS IS TOO CUTE sorry if this was choppy, it's 10 pm rn and I have no energy.

My gm asked me where the bandaids were while I was writing this woah.

Michael 🔪

Michael always got hurt during his killings. Of course he did it was consequnces for his actions it was no biggie.

But one little person didn't think so.

You secretly got a bandaid from the bathroom the night before since you knew when Michael would attack and get hurt.

Your parents were sure that they weren't gonna get hurt this night since they never did. But still didn't allow you to go out.

But that didn't stop you, you waited till it was 12 or 1 am and climbed down from your window (pretend you live in the ground floor if you don't) and worked your tiny legs away to your waiting friend.

You saw your massive friend behind a tree and you ran up to him with the bandaid in your hand and you saw that he had a small cut on his bicep.

And you immediately went to the rescue.

Michael had spotted you as per usual but what he didn't understand was why did you have a bandaid in your hand. Did you get hurt?

His question was soon answered as you took out the seal and gently placed it on his wound. Michael, confused but felt something warm inside him at this interaction.

But made him look like my profile picture was when you placed a small kiss on the bandaid. Omg.

"I hope you get better Michael." baby you said with a cute small and he thought he was having a seizure because his body shook from the wholesomeness and wanted to go pounce on someone so it'd go away.

Every now and then he purposely gets small scratches or wounds, just small enough not to freak you out but big enough to alert you. He loves likes them get better kisses from his illegally adopted kid.

Jason 🪓

Jason in the winter, sometimes gets scratched by carrying big logs of trees and although it was nothing compared to the injuries he gets from victims, you still wanted your dad to be unscathed nonetheless. There wasn't much visitors in the the camp in winter anyway.

He placed the fire wood inside the fireplace but he was careless and small little red lines on his forearm appeared after dropping them near his arm. You were watching him while it happened, he brushed it off and turned to you but saw you nowhere.

After 3 minutes of searching you around the house, with a non pleasant feeling coiling in his stomach, he saw you coming out of the bathroom.

He was about to mutely scold you but you held something in your hands.

He waited for you to reveal what you were holding but you pointed to the chair in the room and he figured you wanted him to sit down. And so he did.

You went over to his side and bought his arm out and carefully placed the bandaid on his lined arm. Jason was a bit shocked but slowly melted as he giggled at the thought of his child caring for him.

And he almost died when you kissed it. He placed his huge arms around you and almost cried thinking about what he did to deserve such an angel baby like you.

He had been so lonely without his momma, he was so lucky to have you by his side. Besides his anger, you were one of the many reasons he still wants to live.

Pamela just adores his baby boy with his grandchild bonding.

"don't be so clumsy next time dad :)"

He was one lucky daddy.

Thomas 🩸 ⛓️

Thomas didn't get love nor cared for, that was for sure. And he thought you wouldn't be any different but he still loved you regardless.

You heard your dad rear his chainsaw as your family had found yet another bodies of food. One victim was persistent and your dad almost cut his leg off! It was unfortunate he couldn't see how on edge you were.

But you made sure today, you were show him how much you cared for him. And so that he should be more careful from now on.

Though he wasn't hunting, but he got burned by accidentally brushing the palm of his hand against the hot pan luda was cooking on.

Now he sat on the couch looking at his now red palm. Seeing this, you rushed to the garage and found a med kit, now looking through the med kit you finally found a bandaid.

Now walking back the living room you saw hoyt yelling at Thomas for whatever reason and went back to his car. Thomas getting ready to get up, was pushed back down by a small, weak, body.

He looked over and saw you, showing him a bandaid and quickly ripping off the seal and placing it cautious on his palm. This was a surprise to Thomas but he didn't budge, scared that he might mess u somehow and make you angry.

He was so happy to have received something so pure and lovely from his little kid. He was smiling so big. And he made sure to always protect and be with you when he realised you had kiss on where the aid was placed.

"be careful papa"

Freddy 💤

Such things as scratches or wounds never bothered Freddy, as he could always just regenerate them back in an instant.

And he was always in the dream world anyways. But his intentions weren't harmful when it was towards you. But didn't really think you would patch him up if he got hurt, if anything you probably think he's a scary high ranked dream demon who is unbeatable.

After messing with some poor people, he had a deep cut on his shoulder and he thought what your reaction would be of you saw it. Would you freak out? Would you cry? Would you scream?

Fun was all about freddy's life so why not test it out. He brought himself into the outside world and found you in your couch.

He surprised you by yelling boo in your face and it worked, now the shocked expression on your face was even wider when you saw the leceration on his shoulder. He was laughing at your face but shut up and looked at you as you ran somewhere.

Well... He had his answer now. How boring though. As he was about to mess with you more, you appeared with a bandaid in your hand as you climbed on the couch and placed it on his shoulder. It was now Freddy's turn to get shocked.

Now he couldn't believe what he saw when you kissed on the yellow thin piece of paper. "I don't like seeing you get hurt."

He was shocked but he couldn't help the smile creeping on his face, out of nothing but pure happiness. Damn you reminded him of his mom... So angelic like.

[nadvs]

Hi Nadia,how are you?

I am SO intrigued by HBD and there are so many things I’d like to see and to address,like :

- does she go to college? if she does,how are they gonna handle the distance?

-does he work for Ward?

-first date?

-THE PROPOSAL

-finding out she’s pregnant AND TELLING HIM😭

-first house?

-how many kids?

-do they get a dog/more than one?

-valentine together🥹🥹

-HIS BIRTHDAY

sorry I just love em babies too much

HI ANGEL omg trust me, there’s no need to be sorry!! i’m so happy that you love them because i enjoy writing about them so much 😭💘

drabbles from the home before dark universe

ˏˋ°•*⁀➷

ᝰ rafe will never forget that she suffered through a terrible, abusive relationship and so he makes it his mission to give her a happy life, to make sure she always feels cherished, to make sure she’s never reminded of her ex. he showers her with love and takes her out to the priciest restaurant for their first date and it becomes their go-to place for special occasions and holidays like valentine’s.

ᝰ she goes to college off the island and around the same time, rafe starts working for his dad’s business. it’s tough for them because they grow to be a bit codependent and rafe hates not having her close by, especially on bad days when he’s not confident in himself at work. rafe never really stops craving his father’s approval and he never really stops being the kind of person who prefers to be distracted from overwhelming feelings, so she talks to him on the phone until he falls asleep many times. and when a storm comes in, she invites him to stay at her apartment or she goes to see him, just so he’s not alone. storms bother him for the rest of his life but she’s there every time.

ᝰ he proposes on the beach they spent their childhood on. it’s after he takes her to their favorite restaurant then he says they should go down to the shore “to skip stones” like when they were kids and he tells her he’ll find the flat ones for her so she’s standing by the water, laughing as she tosses pebbles into the sea, reaching back without looking at him. after a few turns, she reaches for another stone but feels his hand instead and looks behind her to see him on one knee. he’s so nervous that he forgets to even properly ask. he just holds out the ring and says “please say yes”

ᝰ their first house has a beautiful view of the sea from the bedroom. rafe sees it in her eyes that she falls in love with the place as soon as she sees this view and he knows he needs to buy this house for her. to him, her happiness genuinely becomes more important than his own. he never knew he could be a selfless person, but she brings it out him because of the way she loves him unconditionally.

ᝰ rafe gets a rottweiler when they move in. he has to go out of town for work sometimes and he knows his wife has a fear of home invasions from her past trauma so he wants them both to have the comfort of a having a guard dog just in case. she likes to joke that the dog is just like rafe - protective and vicious when the situation calls for it, but very sweet and affectionate with who he loves.

ᝰ she gets pregnant about a year into their marriage. it took a while, so she takes a bunch of tests to be totally sure. they visit his mom’s grave every other sunday and she decides to tell him while they’re with her. they both talk to her, sharing details about their lives, and she says “i hope i’m as good of a mom as you. we’ll see how i do in nine months” and she looks to rafe with teary eyes and a small smile and he is so taken aback and so happy and it means so much to him that she told him there, in front of his mom, so she could be part of the moment too. he cries tears of joy that day (and on both days his babies are born)

ᝰ they have two kids: a daughter, then a couple years later, a son. both of them inherit rafe’s dimples and every time one of rafe’s children beams up at him, he sees his mom’s smile. he parents the way his mother did. and whenever it’s even just a little rainy, he doesn’t let anyone get in a car.

ᝰ rafe always feels so seen and known by his wife, so when his birthday comes along, he’s not surprised at all that she knows exactly how he wants to celebrate. she loves to spoil him as much as he loves to spoil her. one of his favorite gifts from her is a watch with the dates of their children’s births engraved on the back.

[no-song-so-sweet]

I want to talk about Harry Potter.

Well. Sort of. I want to talk about Harry Potter in a roundabout way, in that, I want to talk about the reaction my friend group had when shit started really going down with That Bitch Rowling.

Because Rowling is a horrible person. She’s a TERF, a denier of Nazi Crimes, homophobic, anti-Semitic, the list goes on and on (and most recently, has been attacking a trans soccer manager, if my dash is to be believed? Somehow, she just seems more cartoonishly evil with each passing day). But this isn’t about That Bitch Rowling, not really. Or if it is, she’s merely a footnote in the story.

Harry Potter was, and I think this is true for many of us, a large part of my childhood. While the writing may be mediocre at best, it was wildly influential. I didn’t know a single kid that wasn’t hoping for a letter to Hogwarts. It was a Big Deal for a lot of people, and that included my friend group. My friend group, which is made up of members of the LGBTQ+ community. My friend group, which includes a young lady who we didn’t always know was a lady. I’m sure you can see where this might be going.

The day I got a tear filled phone call about That Bitch Rowling was, frankly, heartbreaking. She was mad because a woman she had respected up until now didn’t respect her. She wanted to get rid of her copies of the books, but didn’t want to donate them. I never want to hear her cry like that again. So I made a decision.

I told her to hold onto her books for just a little while longer. I phoned the group. I figured out when everyone could get together for a weekend, and when I had hammered out dates, I packed up my car, and drove the six hundred miles back to my childhood home.

In the passenger’s seat, was my set of Harry Potter books.

Excluding my trans friend, there were seven of us. I had made a plan, and my father had the space to enact it - I grew up on acres of land; complete with 200 year old oak tree, creek in the woods in the backyard, and a massive fire pit.

Nostalgia and youth, I find, paint everything with a rose tinted hue; if Rowling had just kept her mouth shut, I’m sure many of us would have looked back on the Harry Potter series with some amount of shame. But I don’t think it would have suffered the sort of fall from grace that led us to this point.

The fire pit is important for several reasons. For example, it had been the popular gathering place for my friend group of literal decades at this point. Small towns mean that you know everyone from a very early age. We lived right beside the woods, so we used the fire pit to burn the leaves, and the branches storms took down, of which there were many. And when the first six of my friends rolled down the half mile driveway that day, I had already collect enough wood to get a decent fire going.

Six of my friends. We told the seventh a later time. We wanted to be prepared, and anyway, we all had the same cargo (six sets of seven books joined mine on a rickety folding table). I put them to work collecting more firewood (is it really a good bonfire if you’re not risking setting the barn on fire?).

By the time our last member rolled up, I had a fire going.

She had her set of those damn books too.

(There is a visceral grief that comes from being let down by your childhood heroes, and I fully believe that That Bitch Rowling embodies the phrase “never meet your heroes,” because folks, as a general rule, I am not a fan of burning books. But I was prepared to make an exception.)

We burned our copies of the Harry Potter books that day, all eight of us. They were well read, beaten to hell and back, with cracked spines, and dents in corners, and pieces of the pages missing where we had bent down the corners one too many times. And I won’t lie to anyone. We cried. Tears of sorrow and rage, for the piece of our childhood that we were choosing to give up, because to keep it would be to disrespect the woman we had known and loved for longer than we’d ever had those books.

Letting go sucked. But it was the right thing to do.

When they were gone, we put out the fire, went inside, and built the pillow fort of our dreams. We marathoned Star Wars, and ordered too many pizzas, and had way too much soda. We fell asleep playing Risk, because that’s what our friend choose, and in the morning, I made waffles with chocolate chips and too much maple syrup.

I wanted to talk about this, not just because this is a fond memory for me (even though it is), but because one of my coworkers confessed to me that they hated Rowling, and everything she stood for, and they refused to have anything else to do with the Harry Potter franchise, but they just couldn’t bring themselves to get rid of the books.

I said I was happy to host another book burning.

But I wanted to write this down because I know that sometimes it’s hard to take that final step, to leave behind that last thing. So for anyone who needs to hear it, it’s okay to grieve the things we loose when we grow up. Letting go can be hard, but I promise you’ll end up better off. It’s been awhile since things really went downhill, but I maintain that, in this case, death of the author is nonexistent, and it is better to have loved and then lost, than to hold on too tight.

Don’t hurt yourself on the shattered remains of your childhood magic.

[bianotbia]

— 𝐒𝐈𝐍𝐒 𝐎𝐅 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐅𝐋𝐄𝐒𝐇 [𝐬𝐞𝐛𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐚𝐧 𝐦𝐢𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐞𝐥𝐢𝐬]

˗ˏˋ unholy thoughts start to cloud your mind and father michaelis takes the matter into his own hands ˎˊ˗

⤷ a/n : this was another fic I already had on my drafts, now that my summer vacation started I finally can go back to my creative self and write more so stay tuned :) hope you enjoy my unholy thoughts

⤷ contains : nun! reader x priest! sebastian, nsfw, religious themes, someone gets slapped [wc: 2.4k]

⤷ now playing : monochrome kiss by SID

A wind of monochrome blows

Through our colorless encounter

I shall entrust my pain in its entirety to you

Painfully delineating my old scars,

The merciless autumn has arrived,

And it entices me with its cold fingers

The faint morning sun reflects through the stained glasses of the countless church windows, like colorful spots dancing on the cold stone floor. As usual I woke up, ate breakfast with the sisters of the convent and together we did our morning prayers. After this shared moment, they all start their daily duties but I like to stay a little bit longer and enjoy the vast silence and peace of the house of God. My eyes were closed and my lips soundlessly moved as I recited my prayers alone, however the air seemed to change and I could now feel an eerie presence watching over me, still when I looked around no one could be seen. Out of a wooden door comes the priest of our church – Father Sebastian Michaelis – his piercing eyes fall on my figure and I feel the heat taking over my face, anyway I shake off any intrusive thoughts and promptly head to my morning activities. With imponent arches towering above me I walk down the corridor on my way to a class of little kids waiting for me, yet the feeling of ominous eyes still lingers on the nape of my neck with every step I take.

I am like a burdensome piece of ice

That has just melted into a puddle

You scoop me up gently

and fondle me playfully with your lip

After dinner everyone went back to their rooms, candles were extinguished one by one and the white stone walls now reflected the bright moonlight. A few candles still dance upon my table and cast shadows on the walls as I write about my daily thoughts and feelings in my diary. Lately a dark desire clouds over my mind and stains my soul each second it passes, day by day this unknown sensation seems to take over my heart. Countless prayers, thousands of words written every night, endless hours of work, it was worthless paying attention to any other thing for even after doing everything to stop this feeling my mind still wanders back to him… Father Michaelis. Unaware of the sin that crawls under my skin, I recall the many moments that in the middle of the Sunday worship his words would slowly fade away and a tingling feeling would spread over my core. I shivered and writtled while kneeling on the ground, praying for the sisters to not notice my trembling figure as unholy thoughts flooded over and dirty images got imprinted inside my brain. Every night my mind wanders off to those moments and haunts me in my deepest longings, once again my fingers travel under my nightgown and caress away the desire under my skin. Shrouded by the shadows of the night I can only hope that the all-seeing holy eyes don't watch over me this time.

Nevertheless, I search for a single drop of love

I look into your eyes that have never once cried,

They tell a tale beyond time

If I could, I'd like to be shrouded in this pain and simply let things end

Hiding within the night,

We have covered up our pale skin under the moonlight

On this gloomy autumn morning, I was once again dealing with my hauntings on my lonesome prayers. The other sisters were already out doing their daily chores, however I still could hear some young novices gossiping on a secluded corner of the church, there wasn't many people around, actually we were the only ones there so some snippets of what they were so heatedly talking about made it over my ears "... he's so hot for a priest…" a choir of quiet giggles echoed in the air "... isn't saying those things kind of a sin?" the giggles got louder and so did my hammering heart "... I'm certain God would understand me since he made Father Michaelis so fine like that. Don't you imagine what's under his pants?". That's enough. Anger boiled inside me, my short breathing got louder and louder as a dark presence took over my body and unconsciously directed me to the group of novices. "Aren't you ashamed of saying such things inside the house of God?" I blustered and the three whispering girls turned over to me with surprised faces, the one seeming to be the oldest lifted her chin "Why? Are you jealous that I can say those things while you are trapped in that Virgin Mary thinking?". Anger traveled through every inch of my flesh, my mind went blank and I could only hear a loud snap echoing through all the church halls, followed by a stinging sensation on the palm of my hand. The girl was crying and clutching her reddened face, the other two ran off, probably to snitch to some higher nun what just happened, as for me, I walked away feeling as light as the white feathers of the Holy Spirit.

Many nights have passed since then,

And my love for you only grew stronger

In the sea of obsessive dependency,

I have forgotten even to breathe

I heard a knock on the door of my room and went to open it, another young novice was standing there with scared eyes "The-they sent me here to say that Father Michaelis wants to meet you at the confessional" I looked at her shivering figure and questioned myself if she was scared that I was just gonna slap her for delivering the message "If that's all than you can go, tell whatever nun that sent you that I'm already on my way" the girl shook her head and ran down the corridor, with a guiltless mind I went the opposite way thinking about what could I possibly tell him to clear this situation. As I arrived at the stall and closed the door behind me a deep voice broke away the silence "Hello sister, please tell me what afflicts your soul. May God, who has enlightened every heart, help you to know your sins and trust in His mercy". Shivers went down my spine as my once steady hands made the sign of the cross "Bless me Father for I have sinned. It has been" a sigh escapes my mouth "... three years since my last confession. These are my sins." I gave a pause after saying that and considered lying about what happened to spare myself and the girl of a lecture later, yet something told me to say the whole truth "I felt anger… so much anger… lately I feel like all kinds of sins are taking over me. It seems harder and harder to concentrate and feel at peace" words unconsciously dripped through my tongue "What did the girl say to make you so angry?" with nervous hands I crumpled my habit "That she had impure thoughts about you sir". That dreadful silence seemed to last countless hours "Did you want to punish her for thinking that way?" words got stuck on my throat "... I-I was jealous of her'' a satisfied hum traveled through the division of the stall. "I don't know… it felt like something was crawling under my flesh… anger, greed, envy perhaps" an expectant silence floated in the air "Aren't you forgetting another sin, child?" I could hear the grin on his lips as he waited for my reply "... Lust?" I hope he can't hear the deafening sound of my heart bursting through my ribcage "And how often do you feel it?" "Everyday". Even though the stall was secluded and closed it still felt like a thousand eyes were pointed at me, piercing through my raw flesh, specially those I felt behind my neck lately "Well, I think that's all I need to know for now" his voice seemed different but still I continued "I am sorry for these and all of my sins" he hums again "Why don't we go to my office? So we can talk about this more thoroughly".

While I'm captivated by your gaze,

You've left behind only some dull warmth

I despise your habit of quitting at your convenience

As well as your arrogant kiss

The path to his office was dead silent and every sister that passed through us either looked away or whispered something to their friends. As we arrived he politely motioned for me to enter and sit on the chair in front of his table, as I sat over a faint click on the door could be heard, I turned to him and met his ever unreadable eyes and mysterious grin "We don't want those nosy eyes bothering our talk, do we?". He sighed deeply and sat in front of me "This situation is not much like you sister" my eyes fell to the ground while he gazed out of the window continuing "I remember when you were just a novice. Such a pure heart… yet so aware of the evils of the world". Silence reigned over his office and I said with a quiet voice "You still didn't give me a penance sir" his grin grew wider letting out a chuckle "Don't worry about that child" he stood up and calmly walked behind me "I don't believe you're entirely wrong. All these things might be considered sins in the eyes of God, but I preach that for one to spread virtue must first know sin to warn other pure hearts of the evils of the world'' his slender fingers traveled along my shoulders and up to the nape of my neck. "Don't you want to protect your precious students from what's out there? For this you must feel sin on your own skin" he whispered over my ear and the tingling sensation on my core starts to spread through my body once again "Go to your room and pray ten Hail Marys. By midnight I will visit you so we can finish your penance" my breathing gets hitched and I crumple even more my already messy habit "Why don't you do it now?" he chuckles "Patience is one of the virtues you need to start working on, now go child". I lift from my seat and walk over to the door "It's locked…" he hums and unlocks it while gently trailing his finger along my chin whispering "Well forgive me sister, sometimes I too can give in to dangerous desires" with those words echoing inside I return eagerly to my room.

Don't leave me alone

Please understand me and stain me with bright blood

No matter what I say,

My words will only slip right through your room

I'm already disarrayed and falling asleep,

So won't you teach me something else?

Only the moon is looking at my sighs lost in your smiling inquiries

Hours passed and the moon was already high in the sky, I paced around the room thinking about what could possibly happen in the next few minutes. A knock was heard on the door, standing before me under dim light was Father Michaelis and his gaze that as always seemed to reflect every uncertain thought I had. I greeted and welcomed him inside which he calmly did "Did you pray the ten Hail Marys I asked you to?" I shook my head and he sent me a kind smile "Then let's begin your penance. Please take off your habit" my eyes widened and I felt my face heating up. "Why the surprise? I told you before that I believe you need to experience sin to finally be enlightened by virtue. I as your holy representative will help you on this task, or did you already take the matter into your own hands before I came here?" involuntarily my thighs clenched over and he cooed "What a dirty girl. Seems that the matter is worse than I thought, perhaps your penance will be a bit rougher then". He helped me undo the buttons of my habit, feeling the fabric slide down my body I then lay on the mattress while he also takes off his clothes and hovers over me with his bare body "The only thing I ask is for you to recite the Prayer of the Penitent and when you finish it… everything will be over" I shook my head and started it.

Once the clock's arms point straight into the ceiling,

You will no longer be with me,

For I will no longer be needed

"My God, I am sorry for my sins with all my heart" his warm hands gently traced the sides of my body while moist lips sucked the skin on my neck "In choosing to do wrong and failing to do good" the hot breathing on my flesh sent goosebumps all over it. "I have sinned against you whom I should love above all things" slender finger traveled down to my core and caressed my soaked folds "I firmly intend, with your help to do penance" as he slowly inserted himself inside me I could feel his length filling up empty spaces I never believed to have. "To sin no more, and to avoid whatever leads me to sin" with a rhythmic pace and synchronized breathings he opened up my raw heart to the holy sight "Our Savior Jesus Christ suffered and died for us" we clingged on each other, shivers went through our bodies as sin dripped over and mixed up with our overflowing fluids "In His name, my God, have mercy". He did the Prayer of Absolution and finished it over with a deep moan "Give thanks to the Lord, for he is good" even breathless I still manage to continue it "His mercy endures forever" and with a faint sigh he ends our blessing "The Lord has freed you from your sins. Go in peace". Cloaked by the shadows our intertwined bodies finally sink deep into the stained mattress, with a worn down feeling I can feel my eyes closing and my lightened mind slowly drifting away. His lukewarm hands trail unknown patterns on my back as his fading voice travels through my slumber "Such a pure soul stained by sin… Can't wait to feel your luscious raw taste entirely inside me. This penance isn't over my darling".

Nevertheless, I search for a single drop of love

I look into your eyes that have never once cried,

They tell a tale beyond time

If I could, I'd like to be shrouded in this pain and simply let things end

My wish echoes hollowly,

While the night still brings in the dawn

With your tender, passionate, yet shamelessly sly kiss,

Please stain me, in this moonlit final night of demise

the images aren't mine! all rights reserved to © bianotbia 2023. please do not claim, translate, copy or modify any of my works as your own. reblogs are appreciated! ₊˚⊹ ᰔ

[goldenlikedayl1ght]

fearless - d. wagner

a/n: i know wagner wednesday was yesterday, but fuck it. everyone can leave me alone I AM IN LOVE WITH HIM!!!! notes/warnings: extremely suggestive relationship, no use of y/n, secret relationships, tooth rotting fluff at the end, childhood best friends to lovers, danny being jealous, cursing, like so many allusions to fucking, me writing this late at night, sam, josh and jake being extremely oblivious like just the epitome of "so close! that is a shape! <3" word count: 2.3k summary: daniel has been acting awfully weird lately. luckily, the kiszka brothers are on the case! pairing: danny wagner x gn! reader now playing: fearless (taylor's version) - taylor swift “run your hands through your hair/absentmindedly making me want you/and i don't know how it gets better than this/you take my hand and drag me head first, fearless"

Samuel Kiszka had met you way back in elementary school, back when you were kind of regarded as a freak. You were playing with a ladybug on the playground during recess, and he came over and asked what you were doing. When you explained, he became fascinated with the ladybug and declared you would be its parents. Then, a stray kickball had flew over, crushing your new baby bug. Some kid laughed at Sam when he started to cry, so you decided to punch that little fucker in the face.

You had been best friends ever since.

A year after that, he came to you and introduced you to a different kid he had met in his new class, the one right beside yours. His name was Daniel.

And since then, it’s always been the three of you, against everything.

You became awfully close with the Wagners and with the Kiszkas, going as far as to call them your family. You grew up in sort of a rough environment, but there was always a place for you on Daniel’s couch or Sammy’s floor.

You smoked your first blunt together, took your first shots together, and cried over breakups that didn’t even matter anymore.

You were a tech kid in high school with a certain knack for equipment and stage managing. Sam and Danny were just starting to get more serious about their music, so there was a time when you didn’t see each other that much. You were busy with whatever production your high school was putting on, and they had formed a band with Sam’s older brothers, Jake and Josh.

You knew it had been Jake’s dream for years, so besides their mother, you consider yourself the first Greta Van Fleet fan.

When their song, Highway Tune, went viral, you just knew it meant huge things for them. You could see it in Jake’s face, hear it in Josh’s voice. This was something bigger than any of you. So, you weren’t really shocked when they came to you and told you that they had a record deal and a few shows booked around the country.

You were only sad that you’d be stuck in Michigan while your best friends toured around the country, maybe even the world.

Then, Sammy told you a stipulation of their contract was that you would get to be on the set team, and with enough experience, you’d lead that team in all the equipment and stage management you could get your hands on.

And you jumped in with them, headfirst, fearless.

That was years ago, and you haven’t looked back since.

But then Sam started to notice something.

Daniel Wagner had been distracted. Never a good thing to be while on tour.

So, he came to you with the problem.

“I’m telling you, there is something up with Daniel!” He practically whined as you packed your bag to go to the next venue.

“Sammy, nothing is up with Daniel. There’s no way.”

“He doesn’t eat, he is always staring off into the distance, he’s always scribbling in his little notebook, he’s acting weird!”

“You guys are on tour, that’s stressful. Maybe he’s just like, at max stress.” You argue, checking that you have your lights and pyro cues for the next stop of the tour.

“Why aren’t you worried about this? You should be worried, he’s your best friend too!”

You stop what you’re doing and turn to face him.

“Maybe he’s fallen madly in love with someone.”

Sam actually laughs out loud at the thought.

“Good one!” He says with a goofy grin on his face. “We would know if he was in love, don’t you think?” He asks.

“Then I just don’t know, Sammy. Go argue with Jake and Josh about this, I have to go meet with the crew about the inventory for the road.” You say, and Sam just drops it to go do exactly that.

His brothers are on the tour bus when he gets there and luckily, Danny is running late. And he is sure to mention that.

“Seems like Daniel is late again... He’s been doing that a lot, huh?” He says, trying not to act too suspiciously.

Josh and Jake share this look, like they’re trying to figure out if Sam has a point or not. But Jake starts to really think about it, and you know what? Shockingly, their younger brother does in fact have a point.

“Now that you mention it, He is acting kind of weird.” He says softly, and Josh nods.

“I had to ask him for my earrings back the other day and when I got to his room, he looked like I caught him doing something he wasn’t supposed to. I thought he was in the middle of jerking off but now that I think about it, he’s been like that a lot. Always acting like a deer in the headlights.”

So, the whole situation perplexes them, but before they can say anything else on the matter, Danny strolls onto the tour bus.

“Good morning, boys! How are we today?” Now that they had all discussed it, any behavior from him would be suspicious.

“Fine. Why are you late, Dan?” Danny was immediately alarmed by this, since Sam never called him Dan. It was always Danny or Daniel.

“Uh, I just lost my shoes in the room, and they were under my bed. Sorry, I didn’t realize I was keeping you guys waiting.”

Josh, the only one able to play anything cool, just nods, “It’s alright, we weren’t waiting for long. We should probably discuss the setlist for tonight.” Jake hums but he can’t help but notice that Danny has these large black stud earrings in. And he’s sure he’s seen them before, but he can’t quite put his finger on were.

For now, he lets it go. But he keeps it in the back of his mind for later.

They stop at a rest stop that afternoon, along with most of the tech crew who travel in their own bus. You go to check in on your boys and buy Sam a snack as a peace offering for not believing him this morning.

But instead, you run into Josh, who decides to find the others with you. You get to talking but you feel him staring at your face, and you blush.

“What, do I have something on my face?” You ask bashfully.

“No,” he hums softly, tilting his head. “You just— Where’d you get that necklace?” He swears he’s seen it before but can’t put his finger on it.

Your hand goes up to fiddle with the necklace, almost nervously.

“It’s a gift from my sister, I wore it when we graduated, remember?” Josh does not remember.

For now, he lets it go. But he keeps it in the back of his mind for later.

“Oh, yeah. Sorry, Toots, Guess I forgot.” He links arms with you, “Let’s go find the guys, huh?” He smiles. Happy to drop the subject, you go with him willingly.

Sammy, Danny, and Jake are getting their snacks when something catches Danny’s eye, and he won’t stop staring, so Sam looks to see what he could be so bothered by. And all he sees is his older brother, linking arms with you.

He smacks Danny’s arm, whose head snaps to look at him.

“Just Josh, Dude. At Ease, Soldier.” He teases. But he can’t shake this feeling that Danny was bothered by it. But why would he be?

Nothing else weird happens throughout the day, and the show that night goes well. So well, in fact that they invite you to a local bar where they can grab a few drinks and decompress from the day. And that goes really well too, except when Sam sees you the next morning and hickeys cover your neck.

“Dude! What the fuck!?” He asks, investigating your neck further. You blush and shove him off gently.

“Relax, Sammy, I just—I hooked up with someone last night that I met at the bar, and they were kind of rough. No big deal, I’ll never see them again.” You say, with a casual shrug.

Something is off about your tone. But he says nothing.

For now, he lets it go. But he keeps it in the back of his mind for later.

And then, he notices these earrings you have in.

Large black diamond studs.

“Nice Earrings.” He comments casually. He swears he’s seen them before, but like, recently! It perplexes him a bit and it must show on his face, because you are quick to clear up any confusion.

“Oh, thanks! I wore them last night for the bar and I just forgot to take them out. They aren’t too casual, so I don’t wear them too often.”

And it makes enough sense. Why would you lie to him about something as stupid as that?

Then, when he sees Danny that night, he’s covered in hickeys.

And Sam thinks he might still be drunk or high, or both. Because what the fuck is going on?! You both were acting strange, and he’s noticing these little things, so he decides to confide in Josh and Jake again, who relay their findings, and they decide they must confront Danny together.

Danny is not too shocked when he goes to get undressed and get his makeup removed only to find the boys waiting for him there. It took him a while to get back to the dressing room.

“Oh, hey guys! Sorry, I didn’t realize you were waiting for me. I got caught up talking to one of the security guards and then I got lost, this venue is so damn confusing.” And then Sam knows he’s lying because if HE could figure out how to return to the dressing room, then Danny, who has an amazing sense of direction, definitely could!

“What’s going on with you, Man?” he asks as he begins to wipe the makeup off his face.

“What? Nothing is going on with me, dude, I told you I just got lost.”

“Bullshit,” Josh calls. “You’re distracted, always late, and have suspiciously good jewelry taste as of late!”

“Yeah! And it’s affecting other people too,” Jake recalls, “Even the tech crew has noticed it! Our stage manager, our best friend, is acting weird too, and I have a feeling it’s because of your shady actions!”

And that’s when it hits Sam.

The earrings.

The hickeys.

The necklace.

The lateness.

The god damn hickeys.

“Just be real with us, Danny—” Josh starts, before Sam stands up.

“MOTHERFUCKER!” He gasps.

And that stops everyone in their tracks. He says your name to Danny, and it immediately catches his attention.

“What about them?” He asks.

“Are you sleeping with them?” Sam asks.

“What?! Sammy, c’mon—”

“Daniel Wagner, are you fucking our stage manager?!”

There’s a pause.

“Sammy. You’re acting—”

“Answer the question.”

“No!” He sighs. “I think they are lovely, and I would love to, and I want to take them on dates and woo them, but I am not fucking our stage manager, Sam. You guys are being paranoid. And if you don’t mind I’d prefer they don’t know about the fact that I like them, okay?”

All the other boys nod. Of course, It makes perfect sense! You and Danny both like each other but you aren’t able to tell each other that because of your long-standing friendship, but you’re sharing jewelry as a way of subtly telling each other. And that explains why he was staring at you and Josh the other day! And the hickeys were from other people because you couldn’t have each other! Duh! Maybe he really did get lost going back to the dressing room.

The conversation quickly shifts and moves on from Danny’s confession, and everything is normal. They could help you realize that the feelings were reciprocated.

When Danny eventually makes it out of there, he makes his way back to his hotel room. But on his way up, he quickly checks to see if any of the boys are following him, before making a stop on the way.

The knock on your door doesn’t startle you, in fact, you were kind of ready for it. You had gotten back a little while ago and turned on the shower to let it heat up. When you answer it, you grin up at him and grab his arm, pulling him inside. He shuts the door behind himself, before his arms are around your waist, leaning in for a long kiss.

It’s full of this gentleness that he grants you because, well, he always greets you with one sweet, truly loving kiss.

When he pulls away, he grins back at you.

“Hi, sweets.” He hums.

“Hey, handsome.” You respond, “Did you put the boys to bed like I asked?” He laughs at your phrasing, leaning down to kiss your jaw. And then your neck. Again. And again. And one more time for good measure.

“Mhm. They asked me if we were together though.” He keeps kissing your neck.

“I figured as much; they’ve been acting weird.”

“They might think I have a crush on you, now.” He says between kisses.

“And what would give them that idea?” You ask.

“…The fact that I told them I had a crush on you.”

“Well, do you?”

“Mm... I dunno. Might have to kiss you a few more times before I decide for certain.” You grin.

“Yeah?”

“Yeah... Maybe a little more than kissing too...”

“Well, don’t let me stand in the way of your methods, Danny.”

He grins, and kisses you again, this time, deeper, with none of the gentleness of the initial kiss. But there’s a new feeling you get from him now. Hunger.

And you kiss back, as if you have something deeper than hunger. Starvation, maybe.

And you don’t think either of you will ever be satiated.

By the end of the night, he decides he most definitely has a crush on you.

[luveline]

i am obsessed with your kisses before dinner au, do you think you can maybe write something about what it’s like when the new baby is born or maybe how the older kids reacted to becoming siblings if yk what i mean? absolutely no pressure and ily!!

baby number four comes back from the hospital and steve tries not to cry about it (he fails) | kisses before dinner universe

afab!fem!reader x dad!steve (tw ment labour + pregnancy)

Steve sits down beside you on the couch with Beth in his arms and tries to calm his racing heart. To think your new baby is finally here, right here, safe and healthy and home, makes him want to throw up. He won't, obviously, but if he's a little grey around the gills that's his business. 

Avery sits on your other side quiet as a dormouse. As the oldest, she's experienced this twice before. She can't remember when Bethie came home because she'd been so young herself, and Steve suspects she might not fully remember meeting Dove for the first time either, but she remembers to be quiet and gentle, and that's all she really needs to do. 

Steve had wanted to bring them to the hospital to see you as soon as the baby was born, but Robin, rightfully, encouraged him to wait. He agrees now, because after labour you hadn't looked yourself. You'd been tired and sick. "You're having the next one," you'd joked. He had laughed until he cried, emotional from seeing you screaming and sweaty, his hand reduced to mush. Steve had been beside himself. He loves his girls, but he doesn't love how they came into the world. Seeing you that way… he can't regret getting you pregnant, not when he has all these beautiful babies, but he feels something similar. He feels better now that you're home.

"Tada," Steve whispers in Beth's ear. "There's your baby sister." 

"Another one?" you'd asked when you found out the gender, defeated but not really. You'll love whatever you're given. He loves that about you, and he feels the same. "Steve, come on." 

"It's not my fault!" he'd insisted. 

"She's really small," Bethie whispers back. 

"You don't have to whisper, sweetheart," you say, your face flopped against the couch cushions. You're still sapped. "She has to get used to all your voices." 

Bethie stands on Steve's leg and holds onto your shoulder. He grabs her waist in case she takes a spill, letting her peer down into your arms at the face of her new sister. Her lips part. 

"I think," Steve says, squeezing gently, "we finally have another one who looks like mommy and you." 

"I think so too," Avery says quietly. 

"Yea?" 

"She's got mom's nose." 

"Little," you joke, giving Avery a playful nudge with your elbow. "I think so three." 

You swap. Steve gets to hold his new baby and you make as much room as you can in your lap for the oldest two, wincing when someone's knee jabs your sore stomach. He's about to tell them to climb off of you when you wrap your arms around them, hiding your face in Avery's soft, silky hair. She got nearly everything from Steve, including how much she loves being cuddled, and she melts like butter in the sun at your touch. 

"I missed you, mom," she says. "Please don't have more babies for a while." 

You laugh. You all know Steve wants an army. You also know Steve wants what you want. You could never touch him again and he'd be okay with it, somehow. Safe to say, you won't be having any more babies for a while, if ever again.

"I missed you too. Three days without you is three too many. And don't worry, my love. Me and daddy aren't having anymore for a long, long time." You peek over Avery's shoulder and smile. "I wish we didn't make such pretty ones. Maybe I'd be less tempted."

"That's all you," Steve says. 

Bethie slouches to rest her weight on Steve's arm. God, he'd missed his girls. He'd been hoping your time in the hospital would be quick considering you've had three before, though they've been varying degrees of difficulty, and almost always made you poorly. That hope had been struck down fast, and Steve had just done whatever it was he could do to keep you breathing and smiling. He must be good at it, because four babies and eight years later he can still make you laugh between pushes. 

He's, pardon his language, fucking amazed at what you can do. And he's so in awe of his life, his family, his girls, he finds himself welling up for the tenth time today, the perfect tiny face of your newborn a blur in his eyes. 

Bethie pats his arm as he sniffles. 

"You want a hug?" she asks knowingly. 

"Yeah," he says. "I do. Thanks, baby." 

"I'm not the baby," she says, draping herself over his shoulder. He drops his face against hers and sniffles some more. 

Dove wakes up a little while after that, and when she calls, "Mommy!" from her crib you're thrilled to be able to go get her. You're still kissing her when you reach the bottom of the stairs, your nose sliding over her chubby cheeks as you coo praises at her. 

"I missed you so so much, my love," you say, softly and brightly, affection dripping from every syllable. "Mommy missed you sooooo much. You've been such a good girl for daddy and Aunt Robin, I know you have." You beam at her tiny dimples. She beams back. "You want to meet our lovely new baby?" 

Steve doesn't get too cut up about his family anymore, but he can't imagine his mother ever holding him so tenderly. He thinks she must have, once. Or maybe she didn't. There's no way to know, he only remembers growing up with that spearing sense of loneliness heavy in all his bones. 

Robin, his best friend in the entire world, had absolutely healed him. When he met you, he didn't have to worry about being enough or being too much, he'd just loved you. You'd filled those last cracks, and his daughter's pretty much erased any trace of them. 

He's so lucky. He could cry again, but the tears give him a migraine and he needs to be right as rain for the nights to come. 

You sit down. You smell familiar, and your smile curves under his ear as you drop a kiss against his wane skin. 

"Are you alright, Stevie baby?" you ask softly, one part concerned and three parts fond. You know what he's thinking. 

"I've never been better." He reaches out to comb a rogue strand of hair from Dove's face. "Are you ready to meet your new little sister?" he asks her. 

Dove glares at him. He wouldn't expect anything less. 

[lightlycareless]

I probably should be writing up my other requests, but I've decided to follow up on this ask and write a little drabble of how Toji and your daughter, Naomi (Naoya's the dad) met the first time. Just something silly lol. Hope you enjoy it nonetheless :) ngl i'm nervous i've never written toji before lmao.

warnings: none.

The first time he sees her was during one of his tedious, yet necessary visits to the Zen’in estate—a sulking child dejectedly playing with their toys by one of the many gardens.

The sight of children always irritated him, mostly those inside the estate because it meant they were his relatives one way or the other, and since he doesn’t really care for his “family” he barely gives the child a brief glance before continuing with his day.

The second time he sees her again would be under similar circumstances: dejectedly playing with her toys while in the same garden. This time however, in the company of someone else, presumably a staff member given their clothes.

But even when accompanied while doing what a kid could love the most (or so does Toji believe) she still looked as gloomily as ever, sulking with that pout he couldn’t see as anything else but whiny, if not brattish.

«That’s none of my business» he’d say as he moved on with his day yet again. Although the question of who could be the parent of such a miserable child settles in his mind.

Yet, his curiosity wouldn’t get the best of him until seeing her for a third time, and seemingly worse than before: moping around by one of the engawa, toys set aside, while looking down to the floor in such a depressed way Toji swore he saw the kid crying.

At this point, he just needed to know: is this child really that miserable? If so, why haven’t their parents done anything about it?? Not that he expected the Zen’in to care for the wellbeing of anyone outside “the greater good of the clan”, but if his experience was of any help, the one thing they disliked the most after disappointments, was drama.

With curiosity peaked to its highest, as well as feeling something very demure, almost undetectable, called pity, Toji decides to approach her.

“You’ve been moping around for 3 consecutive days; you better have a damn good reason to be this miserable.” Toji says, perhaps in the worst way possible someone could talk to a child; but one must excuse him, he doesn’t have much experience with kids outside of his own—and even then, it’s not that good.

Well, at least she didn’t run away at the sight of him like others have.

“d…n..t b..d… w…ds..” the young child says, no— murmurs. And in such an unintelligible way that Toji just can’t help but groan out of exasperation.

“Talk clearly.” He orders. “Why am I even trying…”

“Don’t say bad words!!” The little girl cries. “Or mama will ground you…”

“No need to yell, kid.” Toji frowns. “Anyways, is that why you’re all whiny? You grounded or something?”

The child doesn’t respond with anything else but a sniffle and a nod, before hugging her knees to bury her face in them.

“Why were you grounded for?”

“…Because I said a bad word.” She eventually murmurs again.

“I can’t hear you.” He scolds.

“Because I said a bad word!” She cries, and this makes Toji laugh.

“Really? That’s all?” He teases, still not believing her words. She frowns. “Back in my day one got grounded for a lot worse.”

Toji doesn’t know what he was expected; maybe to see her react the same snappy way his son always does, engage in a push-and-pull bickering that would just end up with him mocking her.

But she doesn’t, instead, she just stares at him for a few seconds before going back to her knees.

And that makes him feel a bit… let down.

“This got you really upset, huh?”

…

Silence.

He sighs.

“What’s the sentence?”

“Hm?” She looks up from her knees, a curious yet saddened look on her face.

“What are you grounded with?”

“…Mama said I can’t eat sweets for two weeks.”

Toji wishes to laugh, really, because this punishment was hilariously silly compared to what he expected, with a completely exaggerated reaction to follow! But… he supposes that for the spoiled kid he’s slowly starting to label her as, that might be the worst thing ever.

“Well, you’re already 3 days in. Just 11 to go.”

“But I don’t want to be grounded!” she cries. “I want sweets!!”

“Calm down, kid—it’s not the end of the world.”

“That’s easy for you to say… you’re not grounded.”

“I’ve been grounded, and with worse things too.” He says, and of course…

“Like what?”

She needs to know. Toji regrets ever saying anything immediately after.

“Uh, well, I got to do things I didn’t like either; you got it easy kid, I would’ve done anything to be punished like you were.” Truly, anything outside of being thrown into a pit of curses would’ve been a thousand times better.

“Sweets are too good.” the little girl excuses. “There’s nothing better than that!”

“They can ruin your teeth and make you all giddy if you eat too many.”

“… That’s what papa said too.” She pouts.

“Well, he’s right.” Toji says, and at the mention of both parents, he can’t help but wonder… “What’s your name, kid?”

“Naomi!” she responds instantly. “Naomi Zen’in.”

“Nao—” Toji blinks, twisting his face into a combination of surprise and… disgust? Did Naobito have another kid? At his old age? Really?? “Naomi?”

Maybe he heard wrong, but Naomi only nods excitedly.

“But everyone calls me princess.” She continues. “Because papa says I’m a princess and everyone should treat me as such!”

That… well, that doesn’t sound like anything Naobito would say, unless his old age is finally getting to him? If that’s the case…wow—Toji never thought he’d live to see this happen.

Still wants to be sure though.

“Who’s your dad?”

Naomi blinks.

“You don’t know who papa is?” She asks, with a delicate mocking tone that reassures him she’s a Zen’in. “Everyone knows who my papa is!”

“I’m not everyone.” He scowls, a reaction that rattles Naomi a bit. He sighs. “I’m not around that often so I don’t know what goes down at the estate—just tell me his name, kid.”

“Papa.” Naomi responds proudly, before Toji’s laughter swiftly wipes the joy out of her face. “…What?”

“That’s not his name” he continues laughing. “He has a name, just like you.”

“…is papa’s name not papa?”

“Like you’re not named princess, that’s what people call you.” Around the same way he’s called a disgrace, but that’s a story for another time. “You don’t know your dad’s name? What about your mom?”

“…Mama…”

“Come on, kid, you must know something.”

“My name is not kid.” She frowns, before pressing her lips together in order focus on discovering their names—to no avail.

Not even her own parents were to be of any help, since they’d always use pet names when referring to one another, or at least from what she recalled.

But there is one title that eventually manages to cross her mind, one that her mama would use when she’s feeling playful, tease her papa with it…

“Captain…?”

“Captain?” Toji raises an eyebrow. “What’s that supposed to—”

Wait.

Captain… who holds a title like that inside the Zen’in estate? There are only two groups that he knows of that have such a position, the kukuru and the hei.

But if she was the daughter of someone from the kukuru unit, she wouldn’t be allowed to freely roam the estate, so that only leaves one—

No.

No way.

She couldn’t.

Is that why—

“Naoya?” Toji breathes. “Your dad is Naoya??”

That wimpy kid that would secretly follow him around whenever at the estate, but never approach him?

The brattish heir of the Zen’in?

The one no one liked? Not even his subordinates?

That man—that man was a father now?

Well shit, consider him rightfully surprised.

“Yes!” She grins, nodding. “Mama said I was named like him!”

Oh, now he remembers. The whole charade when his engagement was first announced, followed by his wedding.

He was invited to the ceremony too, but didn’t go, or more likely, didn’t stay for the whole thing. Just took whatever he could from there and left—he does remember thinking that it wouldn’t take long before Naoya divorced her or something…

But this little girl’s existence proved that his relationship not only endured but flourished—and given the way she spoke of him, Naoya hadn’t been as precarious as he believed. If anything, he was proving to be a better father than anyone could expect of the Zen’in!

No doubt, work of your influence; it must be, you’re still around after all…

Well, all that he could say regarding this situation was good for her. Naomi is certainly living a better life than anyone in her similar circumstances would’ve gotten.

“Your mom is Y/N, isn’t she?” Toji asks, Naomi nods. “Well, you’re certainly unexpected.”

Alongside the fact that spoiled brat Naoya managed to behave as a proper parent by punishing her daughter. Certainly seemed like it would happen from what little he was able to perceive of their family dynamic.

No wonder she was upset, this was probably the first time she had experienced the consequences of her actions. But if so, what did she do?

“Anyways, what word did you say to get you grounded?”

She shakes her head.

“No! I’m not telling! Or you’ll tell mama… just like Mariya-chan….”

Toji chuckles.

“I won’t”

Naomi continues shaking her head, not yet convinced. At least she’s not that naïve.

“Really, I mean it.” He insists. “What is that thing that always—ah, right.”

Toji offers Naomi his pinky finger.

“I pinky promise.”

And just like that, Naomi smiles, taking his pinky with hers. Well, maybe she was still naïve.

“Ok!” she nods, and without further precedent— “I said fuck!”

He chokes for a quick second, before erupting into laughter.

“Sorry, I didn’t hear right—what —what did you say?”

“Fuck!”

He laughs harder. Oh, boy was this funnier than he imagined!eHe

“What was that again? I didn’t catch that.”

“Fuuuuuckkkkk!!” Naomi whines, irritated. “Why can’t you listen?? Are you deaf???”

It’s not that he wasn’t listening appropriately, oh no, he heard her very well.

But rather, he just couldn’t stop himself from finding the way she said such common word in her little voice hilarious. It was just… funny to hear a little kid a word they shouldn’t be saying. When the kid wasn’t his, of course.

“Where’d you learn to say that?” Toji asks, doing his best to hold back his laughter, less he wants to lose this gold mine of entertainment!

“One of mama’s friends taught me! Satoru-nii” Naomi responds, his amusement dies soon after.

“Satoru…?” He repeats slowly. “As in Gojo Satoru?”

She nods.

Guess it’s not that funny anymore.

“You need better friends than him, kid.” Toji advises.

“Why? Are you better?” Naomi frowns. Well, there’s no doubt now that she’s Naoya’s daughter.

“Just saying” he shrugs.

“…I’m sorry.” She apologizes. Now that came from you. “…I really like Satoru-nii, but mama said he could be… weird.”

«That’s an easy way to put it.» Toji thinks. “She’s right, you know?”

“But he’s so funny…”

“But she’s still your mom.” Toji says; unsure why he’s even justifying you. Naomi’s not his kid, after all.

“But Satoru-nii is her friend!”

“But she’s still your mom.” He repeats. It’s a “lesser evil” type of thing. But really, he dislikes both families.

“But he’s my friend too!”

“But you—"

Toji, recognizing the pattern of endless back and forth bickering he’s slowly falling into, immediately puts an end to this conversation by muttering a low “ok, we’re not doing that.” standing up and readying his departure—but not before lightly ruffling her hair, making Naomi whine.

“Just keep out of trouble, kid.” And so, he leaves, barely allowing Naomi to respond as she’s forced to nothing but see the strange, yet oddly familiar man, disappear into the hallways.

Toji would continue to see Naomi the following days, and with the same sulkiness that made him rightfully assume she was still grounded.

The difference now is that whenever Naomi noticed him, she’d greet him with an eager wave alongside a toothy grin that initially confused him, believing it was directed at someone else, before realizing that this only happened each time he was around—so yes, it was him that she acknowledged.

And this was, to say the least, quite… heartwarming.

Yes, even a man like himself could feel such a thing—something he never thought he’d experience in his life… at least inside the Zen’in estate. To be seen, even if was by a child, and be happy about it.

He sighs.

Ok, fine. Even when their interactions were limited, he still grew a bit fond of the child. She’s still a bit bratty according to Toji’s parameters, but she’s also nice, and very funny; a very needed change for the always boring, cold, mocking, and stupid people around the estate.

So… why not? Sure, she might’ve done something wrong, but it wasn’t that bad. She deserves a break too, you know? He sure ain’t getting it for himself.

Thus, the next time he sees her…

“Here, brat. So you stop moping around.” He says, dumping Naomi with a white box. The girl blinks, far too intrigued and confused by his gift to bother correcting him. “Come on now, open it.”

Naomi doesn’t need to be told twice before her little hands swiftly rip the tape holding the edges of the box and lifting the lids, eyes soon glistening with excitement upon realizing what it was.

“For me?!” She breathes; big round eyes scanning through all its delicious contents: nothing less than chocolates.

“If you can keep a secret.”

“Mama said secrets are not good.” She frowns, Toji sighs.

“Well then, don’t keep it a secret. See if you’ll get in trouble.”

Naomi pouts, shaking her head.

“… thank you.” She eventually says, with a smile that makes Toji a bit homesick. “Um…”

“What now?” he raises an eyebrow.

“I don’t know your name.”

Oh. Right. He asked for her name but didn’t introduce himself. Better late than never.

“Toji.”

“Tooojiiii” she repeats slowly, as if testing out the name before giggling. “Thank you Toji-nii!”

“No—Don’t—don’t call me that.” He says, with a scowl that isn’t really meant out of disgust, but rather… it just made him uncomfortable. He didn’t even call Jinichi that! What made anyone think he’d like it for himself?!

“Then what do I call you…?” she frowns, as if this were the most trivial thing to ponder about.

And Toji wishes to say “just my name” before moving on…

But when all the possible outcomes this window of opportunity provided appeared before his mind’s eye, his lips parted into a smile.

He might as well take a chance.

“Well, there is one way you can call me.”

By the start of the second week—not that this hadn’t been the case since the first day—you began to feel very, very regretful for having “punished” your daughter.

Yes, you knew this was bound to happen when you became a mother, and yes, as much as it was endearing to give, you also needed to take…

But oh, you just loved your cute daughter so, so much, all you ever wanted was to see her happy! And alongside the rumors you’ve heard of her behavior apparently being so pitiful since she was grounded… was it really a surprise to anyone that you’ve decided to go against your word and revoke her punishment a bit early?

She still went through a week of it, of course, hopefully enough to get the point across—Besides, it was just one small thing, surely your decision wouldn’t affect the lesson to be learned… that much, right?

At least that is what you tell yourself as you approach Naomi during one of her playtimes, calling out her name before taking a seat by her side and gently hugging her. It warms your heart that even when upset about being grounded, she’s still as lovable as ever given the way her face brightens up when seeing you and tightly hugging you back.

“What are you doing, little pumpkin?” you ask.

“Playing, mama. But I’m hungry.” She whines, you chuckle.

“Well, food is almost ready.” You lean down to kiss the top of her head. “Have you been good while I’ve been away?”

“Always!” she gasps. “…I guess.”

“Why do you guess?” you ask, tilting your head to the side. Naomi has never been the unsure one. “Aren’t you my good little princess?”

“Yes… but I still can’t eat sweets, and if I can’t eat sweets, it’s because I haven’t been good.” Naomi lamented.

You give her a tight smile, kissing her one more time before taking out a small box from your obi and handing it to her; she recognized it all too well, enough to gasp and smile!

However, that excitement dies soon after when remembering her current circumstances.

“I know, I know.” You sigh, leaning your head over hers, hugging her softly. “I said you were grounded till the end of the week because we didn’t want you disobeying me or papa… but oh, I don’t like it when you’re sad!”

“…I didn’t mean to.” Naomi murmurs, your heart squeezes with adoration.

“I know, pumpkin.” You coo. “But we don’t like it when you copy bad habits from others; you’re a pretty, intelligent, lovely girl— you don’t need any of that!”

“… I’m sorry mama!” she sobs, pressing her face against your chest, you chuckle.

“Oh, I’m not scolding you, baby!” you say, gently patting her back. “In fact, I’m here because I wanted to tell you that you’re no longer grounded.”

“Re—really?!” she gasps, raising her teary-eyed face to see you. You nod.

“But only if you tell me you understood why you were grounded in the first place.”

“Yes! I understood! No more bad words!” Naomi fervently nods. “I promise!!”

“Then, let’s celebrate with your favorite!” you cheer, rubbing her tears away with your sleeve.

“Taro mochi!” she giggles, quick to open the box.

“Just don’t tell papa, ok? He doesn’t know I decided to do this on my own.”

Although you’re quite surprised he hadn’t done so himself, probably because he was away on a mission, he did tell you he didn’t enjoy seeing Naomi upset with him—how the two managed to ground her in the first place was quite the mystery itself, one that will probably never be answered.

“Promise!” Naomi nods and then, she begins to eat one of the mochi, with her chubby face beaming with delight at the return of her all-time favorite treat. Hopefully this won’t ruin her appetite too much… “Thank you, mama!”

“You’re welcome, Naomi. But don’t talk with your mouth full, baby.” You giggle, taking one for yourself. “And don’t chew too fast!”

Naomi tries her best to do what you ask, but her excitement for having her favorite sweets back overrules everything else; in that sense, she takes after you.

After she’s satisfied with the mochi, but still hungry for dinner, the two decide to make a quick stop by the bedroom to change clothes, before eventually going to the dining hall and wait for the food to be ready.

When walking towards the living quarters, Naomi would tightly hold onto your hand while telling you about her day, which often consisting of just playing with her toys under some imaginative plotline she made up for the occasion—this time: a secret spy that needed to infiltrate this heavily guarded mansion to give a fellow spy a special package.

While in true Naomi fashion, this still somehow went against what she usually conjured up, naturally prompting you to ask where’d she get such idea, perhaps from a movie?

But before she could give you an answer, Naomi suddenly stops, eyes intently focused on something at a distance, with such dedication you could only think she saw a ghost! Until a grin appears on her lips, using her free hand to eagerly wave at the person across the garden.

An innocent greeting at first, making you smile at the notion of how bubbly your daughter was.

Had she not screamed the words that made you choke, dumbfoundedly shooting up to see who it was, while wonder why she referred to him that way!

“Hello, Toji-sama!!” Naomi sang. “I’m not grounded anymore!!”

And Toji seems to have forgotten of this arrangement given the way he confusedly looked up towards the origin of that shrilly voice, not finding any correlation between the girl waving at him and himself even after seeing her… until suddenly, all comes back at him, making him chuckle and think “How could I forget?” before briefly greeting her back and moving on.

Their interactions ends swiftly soon after, and Naomi returns to her previous conversation with such comfort, it was almost as if it didn’t even happen.

But of course, this exchange, even while brief, undoubtedly created a lasting impression on you, starting an endless ocean of questions ranging from when did she meet him to why did she call him that honorific, of literally any other??

Well, if it was worth anything… this shouldn’t come to you as a surprise considering how highly Naoya thought of him; Naomi might’ve heard her father compliment him and somehow, compared him to a deity.

Still a bit… dramatic, but at the end of the day, her daughter was nothing but a child, bound to make silly innocent things like this.

So, you let this slide by chuckling and continuing listening to Naomi’s “highly secretive but very thrilling spy story” as she wanted you to “coolly describe.” before arriving at the dining hall and eating.

Believing that in the sense of seeking the remarkable, Naomi takes after her dad.

That's me trying to explain that Naomi's acceptance and eventual admiration of Toji comes from Naoya lmao. Inherited for sure :) when you tell Naoya about this he's like "WHY DIDN'T I THINK OF THAT BEFORE?!" You ask him to not encourage her lol.

[taradactylus]

Been off from tumblr a bit but I just wanna share my general thoughts about TSAMS, especially today's episode...

‼️Quick warning for suicide and self harm mention‼️

I feel betrayed. I legit cried. Out of embarassment, betrayal, and pure but well-reserved anger.

I'm not going to be quiet about how to show handled Sun's problem. Not one fucking media type ever dares to normally bring up suicidal problems, the people who suffer from this, the amount of kids and adults who DIE from such thoughts. This isn't about the overly edgy teenagers who want to normalize cutting yourself is okey and cool. This is about the people who suffered for months and years with such conditions while the world made fun of them or ignored their calls for help. Ignored the signs.

USA doesn't have much of a public transport where the show is going on. But here we do. And a lot of trains are late every day. Late for hours because of "mechanical issues". 8 out of 10 times the mechanical issue is a local kid who jumped front of the train. A teenager fed up with life. An adult who lost their way. An ederly too impatient for death.

I have waited months. Months. To see how Sun deals with it. A character I fell in love with not in a romantic sense, a character who shared way too many of my own problems from hallucinations from abuse till betrayal. A character who was pushed and pulled their entire life around people who slapped you then said they love you. I wanted to see how he heals out from it.

The signs were there. Everywhere. Sun said it out loud once that he at least fantasized about death. EVEN OLD MOON KNEW ABOUT THIS! He literally told New Moon Sun would be capable of doing it.

So why... why through Miku, the character used as the "weird fandom girl" symbol do they bring up such a delicate topic? A topic that is not delicate because you have to tip toe around the people who live with self destructive thoughts day and night, but delicate because it matters to be properly heard out AND NO ONE LISTENS!

Not one fucking media listens. A lot of us out there rely on fandoms. Stories we can escape to because the world never listens. And call me a self-projector all you want dear creators or whoever writes the story, but you either just pulled the cheapest and most dumbest way to close off a story line with solving Sun's problems off-screen, or you just legit don't give a fuck about people who "self-projected".

Honestly, what if I did? What if in a sense, I saw myself in Sun? A Sunshine of a character ruined and changed by the things that happened to him. Am I not allowed to relate to him? Am I an annoying "fan-girl" for caring about how he heals because I myself have no idea how to do it either? Or am I like Miku for hoping someone calls out on his behaviour because that's something I've wanted my entire life and never got?

And here I am, still somehow hoping Sun is lying. That he is in denial. That there is more to what was shown... but honestly? How long should I wait and hope while the character I started to like is now becoming a bit too toxic?

And with all due respect, I'm taking this episode personally. The creators watch the fandom. Probably have their secret accounts to see what the people theorize. And if Sun is not lying, and suicide is an annoying topic and we are self-projecting too much onto Sun, with all due respect, dear creators... grow the fuck up and educate yourself.

I don't need the world to pity my ass for having self-harming habits, wishing to die and even attempted suicide before (I'm getting my ass to therapy in the meantime so do not worry about me), but all I want from content creators to fucking educate themselfes before bringing up such topics. TO CARE A BIT MAYBE?!

I have survived my worst times, but not everyone does (it's not about who is weaker or stronger, only utter guilt held me back, without that I'd be long gone), andI want for those who has no help feel like they're heard and seen. Cause literally that's all itt takes sometimes to maybe save someone's life.

So yeah. I'm utterly disappointed in this episode. Not because I want the world to know that I'm suicidal and everyone should tip toe around me and "omg pls give me attention" ect ect ect...

Im disappointed because I had hopes for TSAMS to maybe, maybe be an example and bring this topic up normally for a change. But well... here goes my hope for an educational approach of suicide and self harm in a popular show.

[sapphicmsmarvel]

feyre: lost and found

i cried multiple times writing this LOL (i’m dying inside) 

this is me trying to heal the inner child that just wanted her siblings around. may my sister rest in peace and my brother can rot in hell (he’s not dead, just to me). 

tw: talks about addiction, drinking alcohol to numb thoughts, death of a sibling, abandonment of another sibling. 

noted: platonic use of “baby”. Unless you have a crush on Feyre then it can be romantic.

anyway i feel like i need to submit this one to my therapist. 

A very bittersweet moment for you was watching your friends with their siblings. You tried not to get emotional when you saw Feyre and Elain baking together. Or Nesta and Feyre friendly bickering. 

Even their not-so-friendly bickering was emotional for you.  

The normalcy. Having someone you know deep down who won’t turn on you for saying the wrong thing. 

You’d do anything to have an inside joke with your brother. For your sister to be alive let alone argue with her again. 

You felt guilty for having those thoughts. Jealousy. What kind of friend is jealous because their friend's sibling isn’t dead? 

You felt broken. 

It was a party, some random one the Inner Circle decided to throw. Nothing special, or else you would’ve felt really guilty.

After a while, your thoughts got to you. About how you should have these moments with your sister still and never will again. How your brother left you in the dust. And now you work for the Night Court. 

Suck my balls folks

You thought as you tipped the wine bottle into your mouth. 

Oh yeah, you’re drinking. You don’t drink. Not because of an addiction, it just tastes nasty. But you needed something to quiet the noise. You grabbed a bottle of Rhys’ fancy shit. 

Blegh, it was horrid. But it was something. 

Eventually, Feyre found you sitting against the balcony in her study. You needed somewhere quiet. It was the end of the night anyway. But seeing her happy with her sisters overwhelmed you in a way that made you feel horrible.  

“Hey.” She knocked against the open door and leaned slightly on the doorframe. 

You tipped the bottle to her, “hello.” 

“You have your inner monologue face on. What's up?” She stepped closer to you. 

She walked through the terrace doors to where you were leaning against the brick balcony. 

“I’m fine, Fey.” You said as she stopped in front of you. 

“And I'm human.”

“What?” You asked incredulously. 

She shrugged. “Thought we were telling lies now.” 

You couldn’t help but snort as she sat next to you. 

“You’re drinking. That means it’s bad.” She nudged your knee with her own. 

Yeah. She had you there. 

“My mind is loud.” You swallowed. The bitter gross wine taste. 

“About what?”

“It’s…” You shook your head. “You’re going to think I'm a bitch.” 

“You’re my bitch.” She joked. It was rare to see the High Lady so jokey. She had a hidden side not many saw. 

She was a little shit. 

You did a breathy laugh through your nose. “Okay fair point.”

“Seriously, what happened?” 

“Promise you won’t hate me?”

“Yes.” She rolled her eyes. 

“Promise?” 

“Pinky.” She answered and held her pinky up which you grasped. 

You took a deep breath. “I just, I'm jealous.”

“Of?”

“You and your sisters.”

“What do you mean?”

“I would do anything to have had a true sibling. I mean I did. I had two. One preferred drugs over her family, then she died. My brother left to god knows where. Completely abandoned me to pick up the pieces of the puzzle my sister destroyed. I had to help raise her kids, keep some normalcy. And yeah I had my parents and friends. But, I would’ve done anything to have had a sibling my age. On the same level. Going through the exact same scenario and they would know the exact way I felt. I wanted a partner in crime.” 

Feyre was silent which spurred you on. “I know you three didn’t always get along. But, you still would always have each other's back. My own siblings stabbed me in mine. I am alone.”

“Were.”

“What?”

“You were alone. You have us.”

“And I love you all. But it’s not the same. I’m grateful for the found family, but it would be nice to have some blood family that actually likes me.” Even your cousins, aunts and uncles never really liked you. But that’s a different story to unpack that you don’t have energy for. 

She didn’t have anything to say, because she knew there wasn’t anything to say. She knew nothing she could say would help you. 

“I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have unloaded all of this-“

“Shush.” She said, pulling you into a hug. “I’m just sorry that I don't know how to help.”

“That’s the thing Fey. You can’t. Nobody can. This is my life and I need to make my peace with it.” Your voice wobbled. “It’s not fair.” 

It was silent for a moment, you managed to subdue the crying until she said, “I got you, baby. Let it all out.” 

“It's not fair.” You cried harder and she held you tighter. Her chin was on your bent neck, your face in her elbow. One harm was holding your head while the other rubbed your shoulder. Her scent of lilacs and pears washing over you. Grounding you just a bit. 

The childhood birthday parties where neither sibling showed up. The arguing that would ensue when they did show—as rare as it was. Your fathers’ drinking problem. Your mother smiling like everything was okay for the one child that deserved better—you. She was protecting you. She would have loved her step-kids (your technically half siblings) if they had treated her kindly. You are her whole heart. 

The gifts your siblings would buy you last minute. While you were grateful for those gifts, they weren’t meant for you. Half-assed comments and broken promises beating down on your already distrustful heart. 

As you cried into Feyre’s arms, she vowed then and there that nobody would ever hurt you again. She knew she couldn’t ‘heal’ you. She didn’t want to, because you were never broken to begin with. 

“It’s their loss.” She whispered. But she knew you heard it. “It’s their loss, Y/N. Always will be. You are loving, supportive, protective. You are magnetic. You encapsulate the feeling of safety and comfort.”

You sniffed, your tears staining her sleeves as you buried into the crook of her elbow. 

“I wasn’t a good enough reason for them to stick around.” You mumbled. 

“One of the best things that could’ve happened to me was meeting you.” Her voice was thick, as if she was hiding her tears. But you felt the warmth of her tears hit your neck as they dripped down her cheeks. “I can’t take away your pain. But I can hold you through it. It would be my honor to do so.” 

She would hold that promise until her dying days, she knew it and so did you. 

“I am not leaving you. Understood?”

You nodded. 

“Good. Because I need you.” She gave you a squeeze. “We all need you. You keep us afloat, sane. You give the best hugs.” 

You let out a small, watery laugh at that. 

You two pulled away from each other, you rested your foreheads together. It broke her heart seeing your puffy eyes and red skin, tears from those who did not deserve you. 

She whispered into the night, into you. “You may have been lost, but now you’re found.”

[freedomfireflies]

July Fic Recs 🤍

Rabbit Rabbit!! I hope June was a beautiful month for you all! Filled with love, relaxation, and really good stories!!

I feel like this is one of the best places to be on the internet because I always meet so many kind, talented, and insanely creative people! The stories I've gotten to disappear into this month are some of my favs so, without further ado...

~ Not Another Time by @be-with-me-so-happily

Summary: Harry is used to things getting crazy on tour. What he wasn't ready for is how much he misses YN during the Latin American leg of his tour. But at the Rio de Janeiro show, he needs to expect the unexpected.

The sequel to Could We Not, and a beautiful depiction of Harry's love and fear for somebody he loves! It felt so realistic, and I could actually feel Harry's stress while I read 😭💞

~ One More by @harry-on-broadway

"It never failed to surprise you just how well you fit in his arms."

This was so cute, I'm actually still crying??? A sweet blurb about the show before the last show. I wished on every star to be able to crawl into this story and live in it. Sadly, it hasn't worked yet.

~ Been There All Along by @lonelycowgirls

Summary: Where Stella goes to Harry’s last night at Madison Square Garden and gets a call that could change everything.

If really Harry isn't somewhat like this...I'm suing. Honestly

~ Zipper by @1d1195

"Harry was a smart guy, but he truly hadn’t a clue as to why he was so mad at the prospect of liking her."

The cutest, the most beautifully written, the sweetest story IN. THE. WORLD. The title alone deserves every award ever, but the connection to the plot??????? I'm still thinking about it

~ Love Don't Cost A Thing by @justmystyles

Such a beautiful concept!! I like conversations and stories like this because they really do feel so real! It helps really immerse you in the every day life of a relationship with him. And the line, "It's an us thing," LIVES IN MY HEAD RENT FREE!!!

~ Mutually Beneficial by @cherryjuiceblues

Summary: Y/N finds life difficult and Harry just wants to make her feel good.

I mean...we all just want a man that wants to make us feel good as much as this one does...AM I WRONG???

~ Guilty by @jarofstyles

Best Friend's Dad!

Everything they write is perfection and this sexy ass age gap story is no different, I am actually still sweating and convulsing I AM A SIMP

~ I Want Forever by @walkingintheheartbreaksatellite

Summary- Harry and Y/N broke up early into Love On Tour. Harry struggled to truly move on, as did Y/N. With tour over, a lost soul shows up at Y/N’s door one night, ready for forever.

Straight perfection, let's be real! A ring, the final show, AND AN ANGSTY, FLUFFY HARRY?? *chefs kiss*

~ Eros (Cupid) Harry by @0nlythrowharrybeaux

Harry is Eros and he is absolutely smitten with a human.

Listen, he absolutely would be this cute and you BEST BELIEVE I'm so down bad for this man...I literally foam at the mouth when I think about it, AND HE'S FUNNY?? Dead on sight

~ Personal by @shawnxstyles

summary: you and harry are best friends who tell each other everything. or so you thought. when harry finds out you’ve barely done anything sexual, he offers to change that. and then things get a little… personal.

Best friend Harry helping you out. Need I say more?? I NEEDN'T

~ Scared by @adorebeaa

You and Harry have your first argument right before his final show in Italy, about his final show in Italy.

THE CUTEST MOST DEVASTATING ADDITION TO THE FINAL SHOW!!! CRIED FOR HOURS

~ Y/N and Harry are expecting a baby, and they’re both very impatient by @tobesolonely

I mean...delicious honestly 😭 Just...wow

~ Sex Therapist by @tsumtsumrry

in which Harry helps you out a bit, and he’s not actually a sex therapist. (but he might as well be)

I am...scarily attracted to this man. And I am okay with that 😭💞

~ Brother's Best Friend by @helladirections

Summary: Harry is YN’s brother’s best friend and YN isn’t a little kid anymore. Featuring Italrry, teasing, and a sea view. 

He is....so hot. I genuinely have no other words to describe it honestly. It's...it's bad over here for me

~ Complicated Freak by @lukesaprince

Summary: Where you’ve been hooking up with your best friend’s dad and decide to tease him with a tiny bikini.

I think about this man once a week at least...okay fine, once a day. oKAY FINE I THINK ABOUT HIM ALL THE TIME and I'm okay with that

And a shout-out to @londonharry for providing us with all the gifs we've been needing to help us through our depression 🫶 You do the Lord's work, thank you!!

I hope you all find some amazing things to discover!! Cannot wait to see you again next month!! 💞

Previous Recs:

~ Fic Rec Number 1

~ Fic Rec Number 2

~ Fic Rec Number 3

[agirlandherquill]

oc interview tag

thanks @willtheweaver for the tag!

this one looks like fun!

i'll be using Edeva from Ruin's Reprisal for this one,

Were you named after anyone? - "Well, my middle name comes from a distant relative - Maenaire, I think there was a legend written about her once, I never had the chance to find out her story but my mother clearly saw some similarities between us."

When was the last time you cried? - "Ah, that. Do tears of anger count? I cried enough while I was screaming at Fenley for being a mangisen - that's a pig, in my native language. I think he got the message, tears or not."

Do you have any kids? - "No. I never considered children, and I don't think motherhood is a suitable role for an Exilza. I would never subject a child to this life, but if that ever changes... I don't know, maybe I would, if I found someone - someone that was right."

Do you use sarcasm a lot? - "More often with Fenley than not, I don't know why he just- Brings something out in me."

What is the first thing you notice about people? - "...In the old days, I would have said their faces. Faces can change, they can hide things, but I always looked at the eyes - These days, I notice whether someone is armed. I know more dangerous people than not at present and... It can never hurt to be safe."

What is your eye colour? - "Blue. Though Fenley would have many other things to say - He pays far more attention than I."

Scary movies or happy endings? - "I need no tales to know fear, and though I have yet to know one, I'd prefer a happy ending."

Any special talents? - "I can silence the most fearsome man the country has ever known with a single word, does that count? Oh, and please don't tell Fenley."

Where were you born? - "Vitaire Manor, right here in Aliria."

Do you have any pets? - "I was too preoccupied with the goings on of Court to take responsibility for anything other than myself, sadly. And in the wilderness now, I would wish that upon no animal."

What sort of sports do you play? - "Something of a verbal sparring match with Fenley, though sometimes, rare times - things almost turn violent. He never lets me harm him or myself in the process, which is nice. And despite what he says - I do win our arguments."

How tall are you? - "As much as I would love to call myself average, Fenley's laughter can be heard from here - I know, I know, I'm not as tall as I think I am."

What was your favourite subject in school? - "I seldom had proper lessons, aside from personal tutors but... I learned to dance, with Arden. That was one of the lessons I enjoyed the most."

What is your dream job? - "I've never had a job. I've always had an expectation - my engagement to Arden decided most of my life, until our wedding day - Well, I won't say being engaged to a Prince is simple, but it was certainly easier than being an Exilza."

now for the tags! i just updated my tag list so here goes! no pressure of course, looking forward to getting to know some other people's characters! - also open tag!

~ ~ ~ tags ~ ~ ~

@the-ellia-west @tildeathiwillwrite @drchenquill @365runesofthesystem @coffin-hopping

@godsmostfuckedupgoblin @a-mimsy-borogove @frostedlemonwriter @i-do-anything-but-write @r-u-living

@thatuselesshuman @lead-to-code @sunflowerrosy @theaistired @phoenixradiant

@autism-purgatory @corinneglass @tiredpapergirl @patheticexcuseforawriter @missmisanthrope

@your-writing-motivation @littlestchildofthemoon @morganxduinn @thebrownleathernotebook @rmhashauthor

@lamuradex @fantasy-things-and-such @glasshouses-and-stones @hattonthehatman @humbly-a-doppelganger

@hopecreatesstuff @ramwritblr @s-pendragon7 @thelastneuron @heartreactor

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[clown-musicspy]

𝘔𝘺 𝘋𝘦𝘢𝘳 𝘊𝘰𝘳𝘢𝘻𝘰𝘯

ᴿᵉᵖˡᵃᶜᵉᵈ ᵐᶜ ᵃᵘ ʰᵉᵃᵈᶜᵃⁿᵒⁿ

[Donquixote Rosinante/Corazon Mc au]

┈┈┈┈┈◦•✩•◦┈┈┈┈┈

°Isn't it funny how the brother just walk away for a new student,Mc didn't care they really never cared that the brothers just replaced them

°They tend smoke a cigarette outside or listening some of those music that someone gave them.

°When it was the time Mc to leave Devildom due to a misunderstanding , the new student beg the brothers not make them leave since it wasn't Mc fault the new student was ganged up by demons where Mc have came in time to try take the new student but the brothers caught them.

°how long has it been Mc left devildom and had encounter their older Donquixote Doflamingo oh how Mc really wanna hate their brother but couldn't Mc didn't like the fact Doflamingo killed their father just because of stepping down their status as Celestial Dragons.

°When Mc met Law the first thought Mc would do just throw the kid out of the castle window,it was their mission to make kids not join the Donquixote pirate crew the time when they learn Law full name and the will of the D they swore themselves to find a way to save law from this wretched place no matter what it took a lot of time of Mc to bond with law expect for the part he stab them in the leg

°Oh...how lovely of them laying in the snow lace with red..their brother just shoot them for being a traitor..traitor of saving Law,getting the Op Op fruit even going so many hopsital to heal Law white lead disease but those bastard of a doctor and nurses always fear Law ,whining in fear even screaming and crying in fear they also tried call the marine head quaters, Mc cried knowing Law is the one in pain, Mc smiled softly with blood dripping from the lip while blood continue leak more where Doflamingo shot him. "you're Free law.." that were the mc last words.

°Imagine in celestial realm Simon and Luke would be shock and suprise to see your here in celestial Realm

I wonder how it goes also there wouldn't be a series of it since am not good with series sometimed so feel free to write it

[moth-related-inquiries]

I freaking LOVED writing about being Cartman's babysitter, so! Butters and Babysitter Reader.

This is my way of giving Butters a little bit of the life he deserves.

-♡Butters parents only needed a babysitter because they want someone to help tutor him, they're tired of Butter's getting into 'trouble,' and they want to be more productive.

-Basically, they want someone to parent for them because they suck and I hate them.

-Thankfully, Butters isnt even close to being as terrible as his parents!

-♡ When Butter's parents told him about you, he got extremely excited.

-He ran around his room and grabbed a bunch of his toys and costumes for the two of you to play with.

-The week that he was waiting for you to arrive was so painful for him. He just wants to meet you sooo bad!!

♡-When you finally arrived and his parents left for their 'date' he immediatly dragged you up to his room and showed you everything cool he has.

-"This is my little buddy Soundwave and- and this is his best buddy Skeletor! Oh! And this is my computer!"

-He'll be too embarassed to show you that he likes Hello Kitty until you show him that you also like it.

-If you play Hello Kitty Island Adventure with him, he will now be convinced that you guys are best buddies.

-♡ Nobody really talks about how creative Butters actually is but trust me, he is an art kid.

-Butter's never really gets the praise he deserves for his artwork because his dad finds it gay, so he didn't show you until you found one of his pictures from art class.

-"Butters? Did you draw this?" "Oh geez, um, please don't tell my dad!"

-Will literally beg you to believe that he is not gay until you tell him that it's ok. 😭

-if you tell him that you're a bit gay yourself then he'll feel better and tell you about the time he went to conversion camp.

-♡ You are basically the parent that Butters has always wanted and he knows this.

-"Well I just wish I was as well behaved with my dad as I am with you."

-he is basically YOUR child.

-Poor little guy cries about his friends hurting his feelings literally all of the time.

-You carry him EVERYWHERE but he will constantly apologize if he hurts your back even once.

-Butters is innocent and very uninformed so you will unfortunately have to have certain talks about what is appropriate and what's not.

-His dad obviously skirts around questions that he feels uncomfortable answering so you are going to have to explain a LOT of things to him.

-♡He introduced you to Marjorine, Detective Butters, and many of his other characters but not Professor Chaos.

-he doesn't want you to be hurt by his evil alter ego or see him do mean things.

-Though it Cartman allows you to play superheroes, he'll make sure to keep his identity a secret. (It's so obvious but you pretend like it's not.)

-♡Butters wants to talk and play with you EVERY SINGLE DAY!

-You'll get a random call from the Stotch residence and it's Butters calling you from his home phone and asking you how your day was.

-He'll go on and on and on about his day until his mom or dad forces him off of the phone.

-After a few minutes, he'll call you again and continue the conversation.

-He gets caught and almost grounded until you bring up the excuse of calling the Stotches to ask if Butter's would like to stay at your house.

-♡ Butters is super excited to be spending the night with you!!!! At YOUR house!!!!!

-"Oh, boy! This is just like a sleepover!!"

-You guys go out shopping for snacks and find matching bunny pajamas.

-Movie night!!!!!!! You guys watch Barbie movies, Hello Kitty movies, and re-runs of Terrance and Phillip.

-Yall even make your own home movies with your camcorder.

-He was too scared to sleep alone in your house for a while so he's got his own place and blanket in your bed.

-♡Once Butters gets a phone and installs Coonstagram, he takes nonstop pictures of the two of you.

-He will always end the captions with "with my little buddy Y/n!" Or "with my best bud Y/n!"

-His entire gallery is full of pictures of the two of you at the park, walmart, in the car, at your house-literally EVERYWHERE.

-He texts and calls you everyday to ask how you're doing and if you wanna come over and play.

-The two of you send goofy snapchat pictures back and forth.

-♡ Overall being Butter's babysitter is a blast, and the two of you are practically best buddies. It's assured that you can always count on Butters to make you smile.

Hope you guys enjoyed 🫶 I love writing babysitter hcs!! Next up should be Gladiator! Trent Boyett x reader :)