#And it wouldn't be realistic for her to do that much better

[stagefoureddiediaz]

ugh this is horrible news tommy is still around, hope to god he's gone in the finale. v

Maybe in your world Nonnie, but not in mine and I'm not entirely sure why you felt the need to come and complain about it on my blog, but here we are!

It makes perfect Narrative sense for Tommy to still be around in the back end of the season, and even possibly into the start of season 8. The show is telling a story of Bucks bisexuality, so why woould they get rid of Tommy so quickly? To do so would do a disservice to that story - a massive disservice. I'm guessing you're hating on this relationship becasue you see it getting in the way of Buddie, rather than viewing it as a vital step on the route to Buddie.

Lets put it into simple terms - Buck figures out he's bi and then begins to explore that newly discovered aspect of himself. The show has also taken the time to move Buck from someone who didn't really do relationships (of the long term variety), into someone who is looking for love and looking for forever. But in amongst all of that, he hasn't really had a healthy long term relationship, the closest he had to that was with Ali and that one didn't last especially long and she wasn't around for most of it

Buck isn't ready for an endgame queer relationship right now - he is still to immature from a relationship perspective - especially a queer relationship perspective. If Eddie was available and he and Buck got together - as they are as characters right now, they wouldn't last - they're not in a position to do so successfully. And this isn't me suggesting that they need to have figured everything out before they get together - to have fully healed etc, because thats neither realistic or something I would want to see - what it means is that they both need to get to a point where they are in a healthy enough place to put in the work together, understand each others flaws, and their own flaws and proactively work towards overcoming those things together and as of right now, neither of them are - they are getting their and moving rapidly in the right direction, but Buck needs to learn a bit more, and in many ways learn how to be with a man, before he will be ready to start anything with Eddie.

The growth we're getting to watch Buck go through right now - in the aftermath of the lightening strike, his reckoning with his mortality etc and the fact he's now off the hamster wheel and moving forward - in a healthy and faster way than we've ever seen from him, speaks volumes.

Tommy is also a far better developed love interest than any other love interest we've seen Buck (or indeed Eddie) with (Abby excepted but she was a main, so had her own purpose on the show)- I'm sure I'm not alone in feeling like I know Tommy more after 3 episodes plus what we got from the begins episodes he was in, than I managed to ascertain about Taylor or Ana or Nataila etc!

Not to mention, him figuring out he's in Love with Eddie as part of this process is going to be fun to watch. The show has made no bones about re-enforcing at every. Single. Opportunity how close, how entwined and how important Buck and Eddie are to one another - the show has quite literally been prioritising that over anything else Buck and Eddie related - Buck was there front and centre - placed very much on an equal footing with Shannon and even Eddie himself in 7x01, and then Eddie was the centre of Bucks bi arc in 7x04 and in his coming out in 7x05. They are literally moving chess pieces into place to tell an amazing story of queer love in later life and creating an epic slow burn for the ages.

And finally, Eddie is, as far as we know at this point in time, still in a relationship with Marisol - why shouldn't Buck get to explore who he is and what he want's within a relationship rather than sitting pining on the sidelines - that isn't healthy in any way shape or form. Eddie still has stuff to figure out about himself.

Even Tim and Oliver have stated in interviews that this is about a happy and joyful queer experience of figuring out bisexuality and therefore within that is giving the narrative a romcom vibe. But they have also stated that Tommy isn't going to be around for that long - that he is very much a narrative device.

It is worth pointing out that timelines on various aspects of the narrative may have been shifted because of the season 8 renewal - but that is only going to help tell the story because now it doesn't have to be rushed. I'm still fully expecting some form of feeling realisation from one of them by the end of the season (my money is on Buck), setting up for season 8 and Buddie going canon either 8a finale or early into 8b.

You have every right to dislike Tommy if thats you jam - have at it, but don't come to my blog and expect me to agree with you. I'm not a multi shipper by any means - I'm a one ship kind of gal and I will be a Buddie shipper until the end of time, but within that, I am here for amazing storytelling and amazing queer storytelling - the like of which I've not had the privilege to watch on my screen before - especially one that hits so close to home. Its a really important story to tell and I'd rather it not be rushed.

And if you had to pick - I'm pretty sure you'd rather have Tommy around for a bit longer that Marisol!!!!

[heavenlymorals]

(warning: there is sexism and sexist ideas in this analysis because I refuse to sugarcoat the time period that RDR2 takes place in. Arthur is a product of his time and though it isn't shoved in your face, it's still there. Understanding the gender dynamics of this time period makes the characters much more understandable, nuanced, likeable, and better, if I'm being frank.)

I don't ship Sadie and Arthur, at all, it makes no sense to me besides two people liking the characters and thus putting them together. I like them as friends but that's about it.

And let's be so real for a second- even if they do get together for whatever reason, they absolutely wouldn't be compatible as partners because its been shown time and time again that Arthur believes in gender roles and gets visibly annoyed or angry when a woman takes up a man's role when a man is there or when a woman does something he thinks is unladylike in their line of work (just listen to his antagonization of Abigail (for her past as a prostitute, usually), Sadie, Karen, prostitutes, and female performers, all women who take on unconventional roles in their life(also pay attention to certain mission dialogues, and cutscene body language)).

Sadie proves herself as capable, and Arthur works with her, but he makes quips about her behavior or subtly judges her or makes fun of her("Oh, I'm sorry princess. Was there an insufficient feather in your pillow?" "You got a pair of pants and all of a sudden you think you're Landon Ricketts?" "You want to ruuuunnnn with the men?" "Few more like her and there wouldn't be much of a world left." "That ain't what you mean- I can still fight!" Or him being visibly annoyed when she doesn't take his hand to enter the boat and other similar things like that)

Arthur believes that a man should be the one doing the work that revolves around such physical exertion and if he isn't the one doing those things for a woman, he feels as if he is failing in his role as a protector and provider, which then provokes annoyance or in some cases, even anger. Sadie doesn't care about this obviously, and Jake Adler didn't either, hence why they worked so well together as a couple.

Not Arthur though. To put it quite simply, he prefers and is compatible with women who believe in the same gender roles as he does (Mary Gillis, Abigail Roberts, etc.).

This doesn't mean he dislikes Sadie, because it's quite obvious that he is fond of her, but given the intimacy of a relationship, Sadie would get fed up with him trying to be the ONLY provider and protector, and him getting fed up with her by encroaching on what he sees as his duties and responsibilities. He works with her in the way that he does because he has to and he respects that.

Some people may disagree with me on this analysis and that's fine, but to me, it feels like the most realistic outcome if they did become romantic partners. Another reason why I say this is because my mother comes from a culture that still operates a lot like 1899 America and I've seen this dynamic between men and women so many times that it's ridiculous- men who will accept working with a woman in more traditionally masculine roles and prefer partners who are more traditionally feminine.

[the-batcomputer-project]

Batkids Hobby Headcanons

Dick - Gymnastics is the most obvious one. When he was younger, Bruce initially didn't want him to compete in competitions, or even join a team, because Dick would have an "unfair advantage". However, he eventually gave in and allowed him to join the school's team. Another hobby he has is baking. In most cases, he is forbid from the kitchen, however he is a fantastic baker. He is also very good at making fantastic stews, which Alfred has even claimed to be better than his own.

Jason - He's a literature nerd, with a particular love for the classics; Jane Austen and Charlotte Bronte are his favorite authors. However, we all know Jason is a theater kid at heart. He did every school play at Gotham Academy, and though he hasn't acted in anything since his resurrection, he still goes to local theaters with Alfred fairly often. He's also a fantastic cook, and the only person in Wayne Manor (other than Alfred) to never receive any sort of kitchen ban.

Tim - Photography is Tim's favorite hobby. His first camera was one of the most meaningful presents from his parents when he was younger, winning several photography competitions. He hasn't indulged as often since becoming a vigilante. Barbara still keeps him on-call as her blackmail collector though, which he does happily. He's also into skateboarding, finding skate parks to be a nice escape when he needs time alone. Many of his photo shoots occurred at the skate parks, for very emotionally charged urban photography. Other than those, he likes disassembling things to see how they work. This destructive hobby was punished and frowned upon when he was younger, but when Bruce discovered that Tim enjoyed taking things apart, would start leaving things around for him to play with, like old microwaves, or failed bat-projects. Tim also loves comic books, of which he has an impressive collection.

Damian - Art is something Ra's looked down upon, calling it "weak" and "insubstantial in society". However, it was still something Damian enjoyed, so he had to keep his hobby a secret. He was terrified Bruce would kick him out, when he found the sketchbooks hidden in Damian's room, however Bruce just asked if there were any supplies Damian wanted. He's still a bit self conscious of his art, but he is more open, giving paintings to his family as gifts, and even entering in an art show. He still has a fascination with knives from his time with the League of Assassins, and enjoys collecting ones that interest him, particularly vintage knives, and unique knives made out of unconventional materials, or those with intricate designs. Jon was the one to get him into video games, which he denies enjoying, but the hours he's put into Cheese Viking would say otherwise.

Cass - Ballet was one of the first things she fell in love with after being adopted. It was so similar to how she was raised-people talking with their bodies-but without the violence she so loathed. She easily convinced Bruce to sign her up for classes, and for once, it was something she could do, to communicate with people in a way she knew well. Another interest she picked up was astrology. It was something fun that she didn't necessarily believe in, but was a comfortable guidance. Damian hand painted her a custom tarot deck, and she has a small collection of crystals she finds pretty. Zatanna has offered to enchant some of them for her, but Cass declined the offer, saying that giving them actual magic enchantments removes the aspect of belief that she found comforting. She understood that the black tourmaline necklace Bruce bought her wouldn't actually keep her safe, but it gave her comfort, and a sense of safety, especially because it was a gift from her dad. (author's note: I don't actually know that much about astrology, tarot, and crystals, so if anyone wants to add to this and give a more realistic description of how it works, I would love to see it)

Steph - similar to Dick, she is a gymnast, though not quite at Dick's level. She is also into martial arts and has taken a few classes in Taekwondo and Boxing, and whatever other free classes were being offered at the community center. Cartoons and anime are pretty big interests, as well as video games. She often jumps around from hobby to hobby, and has several miscellaneous skills in a little bit of everything. (author's note: a lot of Steph I based off of myself. She's a character I relate a lot to, so a lot of myself is projected into her. Her height and weight being one of them. However, that was also because DC doesn't seem to know what a human woman looks like, because most of the female characters in the Batfamily are 5'4" or 5'5", and around 120 lbs, including Steph. So I just borrowed by height and weight from highschool, when I was at peak physical fitness, at the gym 4 times a week, and doing 2 sports, once meeting 2 times a week and the other meeting 3 times a week. That would place her at 5'8" and 155lbs, which is far more reasonable for an active vigilante. rant over). She also feels like the kind of person who would be into scrapbooking. Most of her pictures are stolen from Tim, and the pages are brightly colored with fun stickers and glitter.

Duke - he gives off the vibe of a soccer player. However, because of his focus on school and crime fighting, he just plays for the rec team. It's a fun activity that he can enjoy when he was time, and also use to explain away his fitness level and injuries. He's also a huge movie buff, enjoying to analyze every aspect of the film, from the characters, to the camera work, to the framing of each scene. He isn't as interested in making his own movies, but gets very into it when he does. Quentin Tarantino is his favorite filmaker, however Damian has stared getting him into foreign films as well.

[zuko-always-lies]

"Good Sibling Azula" isn't an AU idea, it's canon.

[stergeon]

at some point i will figure out how to write the post-canon, post-empire edelgard autonomy fic of my dreams. it just feels like a very big task and maybe like with playing the dane, i’m simply not old and traumatized enough to manage it yet.

but my vision is thus: it’s set years (realistically, decades) after the end of crimson flower, when everything has gone as right as it can possibly go. fódlan is thriving. the social reforms have taken effect. the nobility system is nearly eliminated, if not entirely so, with titles made merely symbolic. social mobility, welfare, and prosperity are high. there’s an explosion in arts and culture and technology. brigid and duscur have gained independence; relations with sreng and almyra are much improved; heck, maybe they've even figured it out with dagda. in my most idealistic version, leicester and faerghus would eventually be ceded back to become autonomous regions, essentially disbanding the adrestian empire. rule is no longer hereditary, but merit-based. there's a roadmap for the future, and everything is on track—and more than that, people at all points on the power spectrum have already seen it bear fruit. with or without edelgard, it will be pursued. there's buy-in. they believe.

of course, it's not perfect—nothing can be—but edelgard's vision has been fulfilled. the people are empowered. humanity is free. fódlan has healed.

and somehow, she's had enough time to resolve her goals outside of politics, too. those who slither in the dark have been eradicated. edelgard and lysithea's second crests have been successfully removed, allowing them to live if not full lives, then substantially longer ones than they would have with their twin crests intact. who knows—maybe she finally gets around to having that wedding.

point for point, every item listed in edelgard's manifesto has been checked off. the ghosts of her past have been laid to rest. she can finally take off her crown. she can finally pursue the quiet, humble life she's wanted for so long. she can finally breathe.

... but can she?

edelgard is nothing if not driven. her intelligence, vision, and sheer willpower allowed her to plan and execute a revolution against two countries and the most powerful institution on the continent, all while she was still a teenager. as royalty, her life was never truly hers even before she became heir to the adrestian throne, with all the additional baggage of survivor's guilt and the desire for vengeance and her need to ensure nothing that happened to her can ever happen to anyone else, ever again.

so what happens when that drive has no outlet? what happens when someone who has been constantly in motion, constantly working and planning and preparing every spare second of every day since she was fourteen years old, suddenly has to stand still? what happens when someone whose hands have been bound for so long—first literally in the dungeons of enbarr, then by the weight and responsibilities of her crown—is set free?

being edelgard, she would step away from the throne, no matter how hard it was for her to give up control. she's always been focused on the endgame, and she knows that if she doesn't let go, she'll be setting the wrong tone for fódlan's future. she's too devoted to that endgame to cling to power much longer than she needs to, though i could see her making some excuses and trying to iron out just a few more things to buy herself some more time to mentally prepare before she's done for good.

but who would she be then? who is the woman without the crown? what becomes of a machine once it is no longer needed, when it has made itself obsolete? what about when that machine is a person with legs and arms and an innate unwillingness to gather dust on a shelf?

what happens when you get everything you want? what happens when all your wanting has been for others to thrive, and now you have to want only for yourself? how do you discover who you are when you've spent decades being everything for everyone else? how do you find meaning again? how do you find purpose?

after a lifetime of devotion and passion and movement, how do you learn to sit with yourself, and be quiet, and be still?

gosh, i would love to meet her. i would love to pick her brain. but boy, i do not envy the work that girl has to do.

[aroaessidhe]

2023 reads

The Girls Are Never Gone

a girl does a summer internship with the historical society cleaning up an old estate where a girl died 30 years ago, so she can investigate it for her ghost-hunting podcast

she’s a skeptic who privately thinks she’ll be able to find evidence of non-supernatural, but weird things start happening to her and the other two girls in the house

spooky lake & creepy dolls

bisexual diabetic MC with a service dog, f/f

[britishchick09]

rewrite eristine's kiss- august 2022 ♥ february 2023

[dragon-ascent]

I wonder how Zhongli would feel if he came home one night, to find his lover surrounded by plushies of him (as an archon, dragon, and his current form) and cuddling a giant Rex Lapis exuvia plush?

Sure, he finds her skill at textile design impressive but he can't help but feel a bit jealous that a creation of fabric and cotton stole his beloved.

Jealous (and possibly pouty) Li is everything to me ;u; so here you go! Enjoy~

The first time you showed Zhongli a plushie you'd made of him in his miniature dragon form, words couldn't describe how touched and flattered he was that his beloved could find pleasure in creating plushies in his image. The fact that you loved him so much amplified his own love for you tenfold, and he couldn't ask for a better partner.

But then, the plushies started piling up. Big and small, fluffy and smooth, person and dragon. Zhongli didn't want to discourage you from making use of your exceptional crafting skills, especially seeing how happy you were, but once the plushies started taking up his side of the bed, he couldn't help but feel a pang of jealousy - something he wasn't accustomed to. Especially when it appeared that he was stealing you from himself in a way..?

It all comes to a head when he returns home after a week-long consultation overseas, wanting nothing more than to hold and be held by you. "Darling, I'm home."

No response. Well, that's all right, he thinks, as it's quite late and he wouldn't be surprised if you'd already fallen asleep. Zhongli pictures you nodding off while trying to stay up waiting for your husband, and a tender smile tugs at his lips.

But when he gets to the bedroom, a different scene awaits entirely.

There's the usual mountain of Zhongli-themed plushies around you, but it's...a lot bigger than he'd remembered. And in the middle of it all, you're wide awake and rolling about with a giant plushie of his dragon-Qilin form, about as tall as Zhongli himself is. Your eyes are closed and you're humming, petting the plushie as you do.

At first he's a mix of awestruck and besotted by the scene, but those feelings are swiftly overtaken by envy. Huffing softly, he decides to take matters into his own hands.

...You're minding your own business, stroking your soft Rex Lapis in utter contentment when suddenly the soft fuzzy cotton seems to morph into a smoother, scalier texture.

"Oh!" You open your eyes, seeing a more reptilian version of your creation staring back at you expectantly like a dog. Grinning, you cuddle him. "Wow, I really outdid myself with how realistic this one is!"

He lets out an audible huff now, and you laugh.

Your dragon husband curls up around you, fiery eyes transfixed upon you alone. "Pay attention to me," he murmurs, and there's a hint of a whine in his deep voice, "and me alone." He uses his tail to knock his cotton imposter off the bed.

But you're still being cheeky. "Well, technically these are all you," you say, holding up a little plushie of Zhongli wearing his white archon hood, but your husband only growls at it, which makes you giggle. You stroke his sorry, scaley ol' head. "You're so silly, Li."

"I am not silly," he answers earnestly, nuzzling his snout against your skin. Ah, how he missed your scent. Gently, he uses his clawed hands to keep your upper half in place while his tail coils around your lower half. Finally content, he closes his eyes and purrs.

You roll your eyes, smiling. "You're going to keep me like this?"

"Yes. You are to stay like this with me all night, my darling. Please do not object."

And you willingly give in, letting your lizard lover keep you in his hold like this until the sun rises again.

[damianwaynerocks]

the funniest thing about the batfamily is that they're so smart but they all have zero introspection skills.

the batfamily is smart. so smart. and they deal with the mentally ill population all the time. and most of the time they treat them good! they help them!

i find it absolutely impossible that bruce isn't educated on psychology. there's no way he isn't. no way he hasn't studied psychology, whether it was to understand the joker or any other villains, whether it was to learn how to instill fear, practice for going undercover, hostage negotiation, how to tell the difference between mental health issues and just violent criminals (because he wouldn't know which ones he could talk sense into without understanding why they were doing it), whether it was to learn better methods of interrogation, or even just an interest in how the brain works.

and i guarantee most of the other batkids are too. bruce had to have taught them that so they could learn how to go undercover or how to tell whenever violence is necessary or if you can just talk them down.

dick has a law degree, which means he had to do undergrad. i think it's insane to think that he wouldn't have taken a psychology class. he also was able to understand damian and how to handle him, and he wouldn't be able to do that if he wasn't aware of how his upbringing would've shaped his neural pathways.

tim has a genius level iq. no way he doesn't understand how the brain works. also, he was able to tell that bruce was in a terrible mental state just by observing him as batman, where bruce does everything in his power to hide his emotions. he's also, several times, shown to be one of the only if the not the only batfamily member to understand why jason acts the way he does.

damian likely isn't terribly empathetic to mental health issues. probably a little more now, but not very. but like. he might not be empathetic to it but there's no way he doesn't understand how it works. how the frontal lobe works. how the amygdala works. how to manipulate someone.

stephanie was in college, and just like i said with dick, i find it hard to believe she wouldn't have taken a psychology class.

cass is cass. enough said.

also!! they all have a pretty good relationship with leslia thompkins!! a psychologist!!

all this to say: how on God's green earth do none of them realize they need therapy.

and like i get why. bruce has suppressed his emotions so much that he genuinely think he's fine. dick is too focused on being a support for everyone to worry about himself. jason and stephanie push it all down. cass, and this is not a diss because i love her, would realistically be very emotionally stunted. damian wasn't raised to be empathetic to the mentally ill and even if he was, he's 15. his frontal lobe is so not developed. plus the trauma they've all endured? the training they've had from bruce, who probably wasn't that concerned about teaching them self care and most definitely taught them to put their emotions aside. so like i get it. but also.

they know all this stuff and??? don't for a single second (except for tim that one time) be like "hmmm i could benefit from CBT and EMDR"

except duke.

how is duke the only one who's like "yeah. you guys aren't okay." duke knows. he tries to reason with them and has several times been like "you guys are crazy. why are you chill with this."

which is all to say. i'm convinced that at some point duke is going to try to sit them all down and be like "you guys need therapy. please go to therapy. I'm begging you."

[aphrogeneias]

𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐤𝐭𝐨𝐛𝐞𝐫, 𝐝𝐚𝐲 𝐟𝐢𝐯𝐞 — body worship

pairing: steve harrington x fem!reader

warnings: steve is kind of a perv in this, but we love it. mentions of male masturbation.

Steve didn't mean to eavesdrop.

He really didn't. He just happened to be restocking the Horror shelves — which had been a mess with Halloween around the corner — while you and Robin were apparently gossiping on the other side of it.

That wasn't uncommon. The three of you were always gossiping like three old ladies at the country club, the only difference is that you were underpaid young adults with too much private information in your hands. Who knew working at a video store would give you that much of a window into people's lives?

That's what Steve assumed you were doing. What you were actually talking about was much, much better.

"Steve hasn't been giving me fuck me eyes. He wouldn't even fuck me in the first place." You were whisper-yelling at your friend, and Steve almost felt guilty about hearing you. Almost.

"What? He totally would." Robin raised her voice a little too much, which prompted a noise that could only be a groan from you. "If you gave him a chance!"

"Robbie, have you seen the last girl he went out with? What's her name again, Hannah? Heidi?"

"Don't expect me to keep up with Steve's love life. The homeric proportions it's taking are too much for me."

"Whatever. Have you seen his ex-girlfriend? C'mon." You huffed, and Steve's heart broke a little over hearing just how wrong you were. "I'm not his type."

"You are even more clueless than I thought."

"I'm not clueless. I'm realistic. No matter how much I'd love that to be true, it's not."

His hands trembled a little as he kept shelving and organizing the tapes. Something in the back of his mind kept telling him that he wasn't supposed to know all that, he wasn't supposed to be aware of your insecurities, but he couldn't bear to be the cause of them.

Despite all that, he had to agree with Robin. He could almost laugh, if he hadn't had to pretend he wasn't listening. It was almost unbelievable how oblivious you were.

He was giving you fuck me eyes, uncontrolably so. He was giving you fuck me eyes because all he could think about was fucking you.

In his defense, that's not totally true. He did think about taking you on dates, and holding your hand. He thought about telling you how beautiful he thought you were, and about making you smile — but all that faded away when he thought about your body.

Since the day you first walked through the doors of Family Video, his eyes couldn't look away. The way you moves your hips when you walked, how you looked with your hair up and your neck was left exposed, making him think of all the ways he could make your skin rise with his lips and teeth on it.

He craved for the times where you would take the night shift on Saturdays with him, when the store closed at midnight, because that meant he would take you home in his car and he would be able to see the way your thighs spread when you sat on his passenger seat. He yearned to run a hand over it and squeeze, feeling your soft flesh under his big hands. Getting to the sacred place between them, feeling you wet and wanting on his fingers.

It was worse when the weather was hot and you used to wear skirts. It made him completely lose his train of thought, instead thinking about bending you over the counter, pushing aside whatever cute little pair of panties you were wearing and drive his aching cock into you until you were both satisfied.

It wasn't much better when you wore jeans, though. Not when he kept picturing his hands hugging your curves, not the fabric that made your ass look like it was sculpted. He'd make sure to walk behind you, as closely as possible, just to run a hand over your waist, or guide you the other away with his hands on your hips, just to get a small taste of it.

Getting a whiff of your signature scent and trying not to get hard, thinking about running his tongue all over your skin.

And when he was in bed late at night, after standing uncomfortably in his jeans all day, finally able to stroke his cock at the thought of you, all he could think of was what he was going to do if he had you right there. All the ways he would worship your body, not leaving a single inch of it untouched.

You, in the middle of his bed, legs spread for him to feast. You, on your stomach, pretty ass perked up for him to grab and grope while he thrust into you until you couldn't hold back screaming his name. You, on your knees, your perfect lips even more perfect around his cock. Burying his face on your tits, on your tummy, kissing you in all the places he wishes he could see.

He just needed to find a way to prove it to you.

[girlgenius1111]

always want you

ingrid x mapi x reader

with mapi injured, and ingrid running herself ragged with the team, r does everything she can think of to take some of the stress of them. she neglects herself in the process though, until an injury forces her to slow down. she doesn't take it very well.

You'd truly never been so stressed in your life. Your to do list felt never ending, and it was your own doing. Obviously, you'd taken on more at home, cleaning, laundry, and cooking, when Mapi had gotten hurt. She was still on crutches weeks later, and still incredibly needy. It had been manageable, with Ingrid helping you take care of her. The teams demands had a huge impact on Ingrid, though, as she tried to figure out her new role in the squad. She'd been doing amazing, something you and Mapi reminded her everyday, but she was so tense all the time, constantly thinking about how she could improve. She wasn't used to being relied upon at this level by the team, and she was struggling to handle it, you could tell.

You'd taken more and more chores off her hands, unable to sit back and watch her fight through tears cooking dinner after another long day, until you were insisting on her doing the same amount that Mapi was allowed; nothing. It was completely self imposed; either one of them would be happy to help you, but you wouldn't let them.

They were aware of how much you were doing, trying to help you with it all, but the more they pushed, the more you pulled away. They needed you, both of them, and you couldn't let them down. You couldn't need them back, not when there was so much to do.

You were having a rough time playing too, not that you'd ever admit it. You felt like you weren't playing well enough, not scoring enough, not good enough. You were training more, exhausting yourself. It was inevitable, really, that you would get hurt. You were overworking yourself, and you weren't invincible. Realistically, it should have happened sooner, and it should have been muscular. You'd taken a shoulder to the head during the last game, ending up with a concussion. You were more angry with yourself than your team had ever seen you, convinced that you should have avoided the body falling on top of you.

Half the team had tried to make you feel better after the game, and none of them were successful. It was a home game, so Mapi was in the stands, and Ingrid drove the three of you home. You were completely silent the whole way, Ingrid and Mapi talking quietly in the front seat while you sat in the back, fighting dizziness and pain in your head. You were spacing out, thinking about the laundry that really needed to be done, not even noticing when Ingrid pulled into the driveway.

"Y/n?"

You turned your attention forward, seeing both of your girlfriends anxious faces looking back at you. It was obvious that it was not their first time trying to get your attention.

"Yeah?"

"We're home, corazón," Mapi said, eyes searching yours.

"Right, yeah." you mumbled, moving to get out of the car. They followed you, Mapi taking longer with her crutches. You'd barely taken a step when you wobbled, dizziness taking over.

"Easy, elskling," Ingrid said, holding you upright.

"I'm fine, I'm fine," you insisted, shrugging out from her hands. She looked like she wanted to disagree, but the dizziness had passed, and you didn't look at her as you grabbed both of your bags out of the back, heading inside. You held the door for her and Mapi, lost in your thoughts, missing completely the way both of their eyes lingered on you as they passed.

Both you and Ingrid had showered in the locker room, and your girlfriends were looking forward to a lazy night on the couch. Both of them collapsed onto the couch once inside, looking expectantly at you to join them. You wanted to join them, you really did. Snuggle up right in the middle, in your spot. It was so appealing, Ingrid's curly wet hair, smelling of coconut, Mapi's warm sweatshirt. You wanted to bury yourself in between them, and never come out. Of course, you didn't. Instead, you put your bags away, eyes scrunched as you tried to get used to the light, heading into the bedroom to get a load of laundry going.

"She's going to make herself sick, Ingrid, especially with this concussion," Mapi said quietly.

"I know," Ingrid sighed. "I don't know how to get her to listen, though, you know how off she's been recently. She won't let me help."

"Try Stern Ingrid, that usually works," Mapi suggested. Ingrid schooled her features, throwing Mapi a glare, making her snort. "Perfect." She assured the Norwegian.

You're heading back out of the bedroom, laundry basket in hand, when Ingrid rises from the couch and stops you in your tracks, a soft hand resting on your shoulder.

"Leave the laundry, love, come relax with us. I'll do it tomorrow." Her words are kind but her tone leaves little room for argument. You're the most stubborn person she knows, though, and she's not surprised when her first try is unsuccessful.

"No, I got it," you said, attempting to move past her. Her hand tightens on your shoulder, and you roll your eyes, again trying to shake her off.

"I'm serious, elskling, you don't need to do that tonight. You need to rest."

"Listen to Ingrid, princesa, come relax with us," Mapi chimed in, peaking over the edge of the couch at you.

"I don't have time to relax," you said, finally pulling free of Ingrid and stomping towards the washing machine. She's faster than you, no doubt in her mind that you're reaction time is slower with your concussion, grabbing the laundry basket out of your hands, and holding it behind her back when you whirl around, scowling. The fast turn ends up being a mistake, as the world tilts and spins around you. You sway, squeezing your eyes shut. Ingrid drops the basket carelessly, reaching out to steady you. You allow it for only a moment, even briefly leaning into the contact, before you pull back, a frustrated noise leaving your mouth.

"You need to sit down, y/n, now." Ingrid says, moving closer to you.

"NO!" you yelled, startling both girls. Mapi's never hated being so immobile before; your face is scrunched in pain, hands clenched tightly into fists at your side, and you look so exhausted, it makes her chest ache.

"I don't need to sit down, I need to get this done. I don't have time to relax, do you not understand that? There isn't enough time in the fucking day for me to do everything I need to, and you guys are only making it harder," you shouted, voice still raised.

Ingrid and Mapi stare at you for a minute, stunned. You never yelled. Ever. Neither of them were really sure how to respond. Ingrid took a chance, walking forward and grabbing your wrist, before pulling you towards the couch. You fight her grip again, but it's unrelenting, and she points at the couch, looking at you with one raised eyebrow.

"Ingrid-"

"-No. Lay down. I'm not asking."

Your tears finally escape, sliding down your cheeks as you give up, sitting on the edge of the couch, spine completely straight, as if afraid to let yourself relax. Ingrid is grabbing your legs before you know it, pulling them up on the couch, while Mapi guides your head into her lap. She's in the corner of the sectional, and you fit perfectly against her, both of you able to recline.

"I can't-" you try again, although you don't try to move.

"Yes, you can. Don't move." Ingrid warns, before disappearing into the kitchen.

Mapi ran her fingers through your hair comfortingly, occasionally wiping away the tears falling from your eyes. Ingrid returns with some pills and a glass of water, and you follow her unspoken instructions, swallowing dutifully, before sinking back down into Mapi's lap. Now that you've laid down, you aren't sure you'd be able to get back up, even if you wanted to. It's quiet for a couple moments, none of you quite sure what to say.

"Let's go to bed, yeah?" Ingrid says quietly, and you shrug noncomitally. You move off Mapi, allowing her to slowly make her way into the bedroom, sitting up with your head in your hands on the couch.

"Can I just have a second, please?" You whisper, resisting Ingrid's insistent attempts at eye contact. The Norwegian hesitates, before leaving a kiss on the top of your head, and following Mapi down the hall.

You feel horrible, wracked with guilt. They were just trying to help you, and you'd shouted at them for no reason. They needed space from you now, you're sure. Being around them is intoxicating, almost always makes you fold, makes you break. The distance now, though, allows you to refocus, and you force yourself to pull it together until you can be alone again. You take a few deep breaths, wiping your face off on your shirt, and walking down towards the bedroom. You stop in the doorway. Mapi is laying on the bed, eyes on you, while Ingrid has her back to you, rifling through her pajama drawer.

"I'm gonna sleep in the extra bedroom," you say, unsuccessfully trying not to let your voice crack, showing the emotion you are valiantly attempting to hide.

Both girls' heads snap to look at you, and they speak in perfect unison. "No, you are not."

You can only shake your head, biting down on your lip, not willing to cry in front of them, not when you were in the wrong.

"Princesa," Mapi coos, holding out a hand towards you. "Please just come get in bed."

"No, it's okay, you guys need space from me, you definitely don't want to be around me right now," you say, beginning to ramble. Ingrid silently moves closer to you, taking your face in her hands. Her thumb delicately swipes a tear off your cheek. She feels her own eyes welling with tears as she takes in the agonized expression on your face.

"We never need space from you, my girl. Come get in bed. Please." Ingrid states, tone almost begging, not that she cares. You don't move, and Ingrid takes the opportunity to guide you over to the bed, sitting you on the edge, before tossing you some pajamas. You change into them mechanically, both your girlfriends watching you closely, watching the way your eyes stay stuck on the doorway, as if you're about to bolt any second. You stay on the edge of the bed, until Ingrid climbs onto her side, and gently tugs the back of your shirt. You turn towards her, eyes still downcast.

"Are you sure?" you mumble.

"Yes," they assure you, again speaking at the same time. Your body is stiff as you scoot up the bed, sliding under the covers in between them. You make yourself as small as possible, curling up on your side facing Mapi. It's quiet in the room, the only sounds audible being the occasional uneven breath, occasional sniffle from you. You've kept your eyes shut, not feeling capable of looking either of them in the eye right now.

Ingrid moves slowly, at first just splaying a hand across your back. You're so tense it looks uncomfortable, and she moves closer, curling herself around your back, larger body enveloping yours.

"Relax, baby." she whispers in your ear. The contact is pushing you closer and closer to the edge of a breakdown, one you aren't even sure you don't want anymore. You relax slightly into Ingrid's body, and only then does Mapi move, sliding down and propping herself up on her elbow, free hand tracing lightly over your cheek. She leans forward after a minute, lips lightly leaving a kiss on your nose, then one on each cheek, one on your forehead, and finally, one on your lips. When she pulls away, you grip onto her shirt, taking a deep, stuttering breath.

"I can't," you start, trying to get them to leave you alone. Don't they understand that if they keep being so soft, so kind, you'll break?

"Yes, you can. You don't need to be strong all the time. We're here, you can just let go." Mapi says. You shake your head stubbornly.

"Come on, love. You don't have to pretend around us," Ingrid promises. "We want you even when you are sad."

You aren't sure if you just reach your breaking point, or if her last sentence pushes you over the edge, but you let out a harsh sob, pressing your face into the pillow under you. Ingrid clings to your back, feeling your body shake under her. Mapi moves forward again, allowing you to bury your face in her chest. Your cries are muffled now, squished between your two favorite people. You have no control, no ability to stop yourself from falling apart in front of them.

They're support is unyielding, though, neither of them moving away from you for even a second. You're soaking Mapi's shirt with tears, but both of them are whispering soft reassurances to you, ones you try to let yourself hear. You cry for a while, long enough that your head is pounding, though that might be from the concussion, and your throat feels raw. You don't really remember stopping, either. You must, pathetically, have fallen asleep whilst crying.

Ingrid and Mapi hear your breathing even out, tears having finally stopped falling down your face. The Norwegian looks up at your other girlfriend, then, looking devastated, and Mapi sighs roughly, reaching a hand over to cradle Ingrid's cheek.

"It's not your fault, Ingrid,"

"I shouldn't have let her do everything, and I should have noticed she was struggling." Ingrid whispered, looking down at you like you're the most precious thing in the world, and she's broken you.

"Then I should have too, but you don't blame me, do you?"

"You have one working leg, María, I'm completely fine, yet I let her go crazy taking over everything in the house." Ingrid argued miserably.

"Don't pretend you haven't been stressed too, Ingrid," Mapi said sternly. "You don't get to blame yourself. That won't help her, and it won't help you."

"How do we help her?" Ingrid asks after a minute, looking between the two of you.

"We get her to talk. Something is going on, or she wouldn't be acting so weird. And I've never seen her cry this hard." Mapi swallows thickly. "We get her to tell us what's bothering her, and we fix it."

Ingrid gets the impression that if you told Mapi that going to the moon would make you feel better, the Spaniard would find a way to do it. She softens at this thought, heart overwhelmingly full looking between the two of you. Even though your face is stained with tears, and Mapi's leg is wrapped in white gauze, there isn't a more beautiful sight. Not to her.

"Sleep, princesa," Mapi tells her, leaning over you to kiss Ingrid softly on the lips. "Te amo." She leans down to you, kissing your forehead as you sleep, whispering the same thing against your skin.

Ingrid does the same, pulling you closer into her body as she gets comfortable. It's harder for Mapi, but she manages to shift so that she's on her back, head tilted so her face is pressed into your shoulder. You wake up, just slightly, at the movement around you.

"Love you," you mumble, deciding that both of them are going to have to make do with not being addressed specifically. You relax back into them, the stress and anxiety that had been plaguing you for weeks unable to touch you while you slept, completely surrounded by your girls' love.

-----

You're confused when you hear the sound of an alarm, and are then shaken awake what feels like only a couple hours later. Grumpily, you crack your eyes open, seeing Mapi's face above you, hidden by darkness.

"Why?" You groan, shutting your eyes again. Mapi laughs quietly.

"You have a concussion, amor. Just needed to check on you."

"Hmph," you grumble. If you were more awake, you'd marvel at the fact that they remembered to wake you, even after the way you'd acted. Even with Mapi's knee messed up, definitely needing rest, her first thought was always you.

"Are you feeling alright? Nauseous? Dizzy?"

"I'm fine. A little dizzy."

"Promise you are okay?" She asks, smoothing your hair back.

"Promise." She nods, satisfied, and you roll into her, keeping a tight grip on Ingrid's shirt on your other side, drifting off again.

-----

They wake you a few more times throughout the night; each time you are annoyed at first, and each time they are so gentle, so kind, you feel like a wave of love is washing over you.

The next morning, when you blink your eyes open, seeing light flooding in around the curtains, you hear them speaking lightly to each other over you. The light is making your head pound, and you let out an involuntary groan of pain, pulling the covers over your head. They're conversation cuts off, and you can picture them exchanging looks.

"Amor?" Mapi asks, concerned.

"Too bright. Hurts." you say, having woken up only seconds ago, unwilling to really form full sentences.

There's some shuffling, and then someone is pulling insistently on the covers. You allow them to be pulled off your head, and frowning up at Ingrid and Mapi through half shut eyes. They're both fighting smiles at your disheveled hair, and the grouchy expression on your face. Mapi slides a pair of sunglasses onto your face, and you thank her quietly. Ingrid moves to slide out of the bed, but your hand pulling on her shirt stops her.

"Stay. I'm comfy."

"You don't want coffee?" she asks, expecting you to relent.

You shake your head though, and she looks at Mapi briefly, before climbing back into the bed, and pulling you into her. You sigh contentedly, burrowing in.

Something has changed, your girlfriends can tell. Your breakdown last night has left you clingy- not that they mind. It's just worrying, as you rarely act that way.

"Princesa," Mapi begins. "Can we talk about last night?"

You stiffen noticeably against Ingrid, rolling away from her chest to stare up at the ceiling.

"I'm so sorry. I shouldn't have yelled at you guys, there's no excuse."

"Thank you for apologizing, elskling, but that isn't really what we're talking about." Ingrid chimes in, her voice quiet and low, as if she's talking to a cornered animal.

"I'm sorry I lost it, I don't know what happened."

Both girls shake their heads. This time it's Mapi that responds.

"Please do not apologize for having emotions, amor. You needed that, and we were happy to be there for you."

Your eyes shift to hers. "What is there to talk about then?"

Ingrid rolls her eyes, as your attention is on Mapi, at how little weight you put on your emotions and wellbeing. If her or Mapi had broken down like you had last night, you'd be worried sick.

"You're taking on too much. You need to let us help you, it's too much for one person, and both of us are completely capable of doing chores."

"You guys have a lot going on, I'm barely doing anything." You argue weakly.

"You know that isn't true. This has to stop, it's not sustainable. You're exhausted, and now you're hurt. We're putting you on bedrest for the next week." Ingrid says. It has an air of finality to it, but you try anyway.

"But-"

"-No arguments." Mapi cuts in.

"You guys need me." You say quietly, trying to get them to understand why you needed to do this stuff for them.

"We do. We need you happy, and healthy. And you need us too, love. It's your turn to let us take care of you."

"I've been in a horrible mood, I wouldn't even want to be around me. And I don't deserve- need to be taken care of. I'm fine." You pause briefly, biting your lip, trying to decide if you should voice the thing thats been bothering you the most. "If anything, I need to work harder, I've been playing so badly."

Your voice breaks on the last word, and you shut your eyes again, reaching under the sunglasses to furiously wipe a tear away. A hand grips your chin, turning your face towards Ingrid. She has a intense blazing expression on her face, one of anger, and you're honestly confused.

"First of all, we always want to be around you. Second, you absolutely have not been playing badly. You've been working so hard, darling, and it's been paying off." You scoff in disbelief. Ingrid's jaw clenches, and she looks at Mapi almost helplessly, as if she isn't sure what to say. The Spaniard is turning your face towards her now. Mapi's warm eyes bore into yours through your sunglasses, begging you to listen.

"You always deserve to be taken care of, princesa." You winced, you'd been hoping they wouldn't catch that slip up. "Even if you had been playing badly, which you absolutely haven't, you still deserve our love, amor. Always."

"Then why don't I feel like I do?" you whisper.

"Oh, love," Ingrid says sadly, leaning in to rest her lips on your forehead, leaving several pecks there. "I don't know why, but I promise that you do."

"We'll just have to remind you more, hmm? That you are our niña bonita, and we always love you. We always want you, and want to give you what you need. Okay?" Mapi finishes.

Hesitantly, you nod. Their anxious faces break into smiles at your agreement, and they both lean in, pressing simultaneous kisses to your cheeks. You laugh, feeling their matching grins against your cheeks, and wonder how you possibly got so lucky.

-----

I tried to end this like 16 paragraphs ago but I was unsuccessful.

[highhhfiveee]

okay here me out. abby teasing reader about having a crush on mike, and when he's around very 'subtle' teasing from abby to reader... SORRY IF THIS DOESNT MAKE SENSE BUT ITS BEEN ON MY MIND.

it makes sense! i was working on a little ficlet for the "mint" series and i think this works with it (,:

self care

a "mint" ficlet. read the og here: 🍫

tags: mint!mike and reader, fluff, no warnings, just cute stuff (:

mike lets out a long sigh as he turns the car off, rubbing his hands down his face. security work is exhausting, and while he understands working overnight shifts, he doesn't see how it's healthy.

he's always tired, always irritable, always ready to call it quits and say "fuck work", staying home until he's caught up on his winks.

it would be a dream for him, he thinks, but he knows it's not realistic. he's doing this to better his life, better abby's life; it would all be worth it in the end, he hoped.

he exits the car with no urgency, trotting his way to the front door. he's excited to see you and abby, eager to sit and eat breakfast with you guys, tell you about his night.

he turns the knob and it gives with no trouble, which makes his heart rate tick up. the door is never unlocked.

he bursts inside frantically, beginning to panic a bit when he sees that you aren't in your usual spot on the couch, cuddled into one of the blankets or sweeping your green mint wrappers into your hand. the tv wasn't on. there wasn't anything happening in the kitchen.

it was eerily quiet, too quiet for his liking.

"y/n?" he calls, wildly hanging his security vest and kicking off his shoes. "abby?"

mike wonders why the two of you aren't answering, beginning down the hall with his hands balled into anxious fists. what if something had happened to you two? what if he went into one of the rooms and found something undesirable, something that turned him frigid and reserved? what if someone had hurt you?

the light's on in the bathroom, framing the closed door in a fuzzy ring of yellow gold. mike hears voices, muffled but persistent, and music. it's all it takes for him to lean against the door, grip the doorknob and count down before he charges into the wood, slamming the door open and yelling into the bathroom.

you and abby squeal, bodies wracked with fear. you both have green paste all over your faces, spread around your eyes and mouths in a precise layer. you're holding onto your chest as you try to calm down, tapping on your phone to stop the music you're playing. abby heaves angrily, marching over to mike and giving him a moderately powered shove. "not funny, mike!"

"i wasn't trying to be funny," he utters, huffing along with you two. "i thought someone had broken in or something. the door was unlocked and i called for both of you but you didn't answer. i was terrified." you frown, shaking your head in disappointment at yourself.

"i'm really sorry, mike. i took the trash out earlier and i guess i forgot to lock the door when i came back in. i would never try to put abby in harm's way."

"no, no, it's okay," mike returns, taking a deep-rooted sigh of relief now that he knows you two are safe. "i know you wouldn't. mistakes happen, i just lost it a little. wouldn't want anything to ever happen to you two."

your cheeks heat up at "you two". you're flattered that he cares about your safety at the same level that he cares about abby's, or at all really. you knew that abby meant everything to him, but you wondered just how much you meant to him, exactly.

"that's totally understandable. sorry i didn't hear you calling either, we were kind of caught up in the music and face masks," you chuckle shyly, pulling the sleeves of the forest green sweatshirt you were wearing over your hands. it's mike's sweatshirt, one that he thinks he remembers giving to abby sometime ago. you look good in it.

"y/n was teaching me about 'self care', and how doing little things for myself is important. we started with skincare, see?" abby places her hands under her chin, using them to hold her face as she smiles.

it hadn't been your plan to use your $40 face mask on abby this morning, but you didn't mind. you'd been in the bathroom, humming along to the soothing ambient music that floated from your phone speakers and smothering your face in green like you'd be starring in Wicked when she appeared in the doorframe, bleary eyed and lethargic. "may i pee?"

you exited the bathroom and closed the door behind you, opening it back up once you heard the toilet flush and the faucet run. "what's on your face?" she asked, shaking the water off of her hands.

"it's a face mask. this one is my personal favorite. it's specifically for moisturizing the skin, but there are so many other ones that do different things. i do them sometimes as a part of self care."

"what's self care?"

"i can explain it to you. want to try some of the mask after you brush your teeth?" she nodded happily, beginning to shed any trace of sleepiness.

"my skin is a bit dry." you laughed at her, helping her with her toothbrush. after, you'd sat her on the bathroom counter, scooping product with your middle and ring fingers and smearing it across abby's delicate skin.

"so, it's just like...taking care of yourself? literal self care?" you nodded, filling in whatever gaps you could find.

"mhm. just doing small things to make yourself feel better, happy, more fulfilled. we all need to take care of ourselves, living these lives. it's important to remember to take time for yourself when you need it, okay? taking breaks is good. humans need rest."

"mike never rests," she admitted, pouting at the thought of mike working all the time, tired and distant from the strain on his mental and physical health. "i don't even think he knows what rest is."

"i'm sure he does, he's just working hard to make sure you're never in need. he cares about you a lot, and wants you to be safe, and happy, and taken care of."

"which is nice," abby muttered, turning to look at her face in the mirror. she smiled, humming in contentment before facing you again. "i just wish he would go do something. take off from work and go out. go on a date." you jovially scoff at her words, tickling at her abdomen.

"what do you know about dating, huh? does mike even like dates?"

"i think he'd like a date with you." your entire body flushed with mortification, and you stepped back from abby, stumbling over your words with nervous laughter.

"t-t-there's no way he would, abby. that's silly. i don't even like him like that, it would be unprofessional..." you bit at your bottom lip, avoiding abby's eyes.

"oh please. you're my unpaid babysitter, not a salaried nanny," she reassured curtly, and you frowned at her, playfully insulted. "plus, i know you have a crush on him, y/n. it's so obvious. i saw you nearly die when he gave you those mints. i'm sure he see stuff like that too if he wasn't so clueless about everything."

you nodded, gnawing at your bottom lip so hard you drew blood. "well, jeez, thank you for the exposé, abby. still, i don't think he feels the same way. he has no time to think about me." abby only squinted at you, her lips pursed with amusement.

"or so you think." you'd waved her off, pivoting the subject by showing her your skincare collection, explaining all the different tubes and bottles. you'd fanned them out over the counter, grouping things by step.

"and this is vitamin c...usually comes before your moisturizer and helps with dark spots, dullness...you have to wear sunscreen when you wear it, but you should be wearing sunscreen everyday anyway bec----"

mike had burst in at this moment, scaring the shit out of both you and abby. how you'd forgotten to lock the door, you didn't know, but you're glad mike had gotten home before anyone else could enter.

now, mike just tiredly returns his sister's smile. "that's nice, abs."

"yeah, was telling y/n that you should try it. you need to rest and take care of yourself." mike nods, pursing his lips in that tickled way that abby did earlier.

"that so? do a couple of face masks, take a bath, and make some tea to renew myself?"

"sounds like a plan to me," abby cheers, looking towards you. "add going on a date to the list and now, we're talkin'."

"a date?" mike ridicules, shaking his head at abby's frivolous suggestion. "a date with who?"

"i may know someone," abby teases, winking over at you so unmistakably that you're sure you're going to combust with the number of times you've flushed hot. "someone not too far, in fact."

mike can tell that abby is killing you, prodding at your private, adult feelings and decides to make her stop. "okay, abs, that's enough. wash your face while i go talk to y/n, okay? and no eavesdropping."

"i can try, but not promise."

"abby," mike asserts, and she shrinks under his serious stare, mumbling, "okay, okay, jeez."

you follow mike out into the living room, once again tugging at the sleeves of his sweatshirt. it drapes over you nicely, about one size too big, and the color looks so nice against your skin, rich and earthy.

"thanks for looking after her, as always," he commends, eyes still trained on you as you return his kindness with a soft "yeah, always. sorry again about the door." but mike dismisses your apology with a wave.

after a moment, he says, "that sweatshirt's nice," rubbing his fingers against his stubbled chin.

you drop your gaze down, smiling at the clothing item. you liked it a lot. it was super comfy and smelled like their place, pacifying you through the late night and early morning. "oh thanks. i left my sweater at home and abby let me borrow this one. it's so cute on her but it's super big."

"yeah," mike snickers, letting out some air through his nose. "that's 'cause it's mine." your body's color is replaced with flaming red, burning from the top of your forehead to the soles of your feet. how many more times could you be embarrassed this morning?

"oh my god, i'm so sorry. here, i can give it back," you panic, beginning to pull the item over your head, careful to not get your face mask on it. mike stops you with a hand to your elbow, a gentle graze that doesn't move even when you have the sweatshirt back over your torso.

"hey, hey, no need. i gave it to her but i like how it looks on you. you look really beautiful...face mask and all." you blush vehemently, whimpering out "thank you" and bringing your thumb to your mouth to gnaw at so you don't say something else you might regret. you're sure mike can read your jitteriness, and you try to slip into a cool girl attitude when his eyes toss coyness your way.

you'd been babysitting abby for a while, and something about the way you continued to despite the hours and not being paid softened mike. of course he intended on paying you, but even when he did, he would always remember you as so kind, so generous; such a beautiful soul in a beautiful body.

"so...about that date?" he proposes, and the two of you hear a hushed, "yes!" around the corner of the wall. you both turn towards it, catching abby as she runs across the hall to her room.

"abby!"

"i said try!"

how flipping CUTE! i love cute shit like this, and after writing so much smut, it was nice to write something oh so sweet (((: gonna be posting smut next though lmao, just something slight, something slight. hope you enjoyed!

faire's seedlings ✿

@leahdhopkins4321-@pyr0-kai-@angstywhore-@sunazroo-@nyxthoughtss-@mirophobic-@fayethor-@marixsimps-@regretfulme-@ithinkitszeph-@707xn-@cattt777-@violetta-ximena-@amnesia33-@topnerd03-@fastnights-@laprvphette-@savage-aespa-@mfdxz-@0-tatiana-0-@dusstory

[vaguely-concerned]

listen I don't even know what I'm talking about anymore but on this playthrough of DA2 I found myself once more entranced and heartbroken to see hawke reenact their relationship with their mother with the entire cursed city of kirkwall. you can never do enough for leandra, and you can never do enough for kirkwall. leandra is proud of you, and kirkwall uplifts its champion, but no matter how hard you try for them you can't fix everything there that's broken, no one could, and even the fact that anyone would feel the burning responsibility to take that task on is a huge warning sign on its own. leandra will easily allow you to sacrifice yourself on the altar of the family's continued well-being again and again, even when she'll beg you to spare the twins from the same thing. it's such a sad, painfully realistic thing because I truly don't think leandra meant to fuck up her kids, and yet she primed her oldest for an abusive toxic codependent relationship with an entire ongoing dumpster fire of a city state better than she ever could have if she had meant to.

I think what leandra actually, deep down wants from you is something you can never ever give her and that is cruel to ask of anyone, but especially your kid -- to bring her back to a time when she was happy. to reclaim when you were all happy, when nothing was broken that couldn't be fixed, before malcolm died, before you had to leave behind bethany or carver's broken body on the ground. to get her childhood back from where she left it and found it all gone and in ruins when she returned. 'this is all your fault'. this is the tragedy of parenthood sometimes I think, that capacity to define a life: she said that once, in a moment of profound pain, and she probably wouldn't have said it under other circumstances and she apologizes later, but now hawke has to live with that forever. leandra can't bear her own emotions without letting them spill over onto someone else so she won't have to hold the discomfort of them anymore, and hawke is left to shoulder that burden and responsibility again and again, handed the impossible task of making it all okay again, somehow -- of stopping anything bad from ever happening again in the Nr 1 Bad Things Constantly Happening capital of thedas.

and then at the same time there's the mirror of how varric's whole family wants orzammar back (and to him orzammar is just a ghost he's seen in their eyes -- there's something in his voice when he says 'That stupid plate was the whole city of Orzammar to him' that gets me every time, how much he understands that he doesn't understand and how lonely that makes him among them, and on top of it all he's frustrated and ashamed and sad that he just doesn't get it and can't meet them on it -- like it's a betrayal that he actually belongs up here, when varric wants so badly to be loyal), just as the hawkes want happiness back. (I don't think it's Lothering in itself that longing is for, it's for being together. Lothering was just the place they stayed the longest.) they're all in exile, even as they try to make a new home out of that exile.

(varric and hawke's real 🤝 quality across all personalities, affinities and choices is 'parentified child' lmao. so much of varric's character makes perfect sense once you know he grew up supporting a mother who was an emotionally volatile alcoholic, honestly. between varric, the hawkes, isabela, seb if you have him and merrill's whole Situation with marethari I feel like DA2 covertly is to mommy issues what ME2 is to daddy issues fjsdjfa)

basically I think I'm trying to pick apart exactly why the fact that leandra is clearly proud of hawke and tells them so several times doesn't feel like it helps at all, almost feels more like a cage even though it's clearly meant well? and what I'm getting is that it's because my sense of what hawke actually needs, in general but especially from a parent, isn't admiration or approval but to be loved and supported and understood. I don't believe leandra ever quite understands them, and it scares her because it makes her think she maybe never even understood malcolm. (that's the subtext of a lot of what leandra will say about him in legacy, at least. he's slipping away from her as the years pass after his death and she fears she never really had him in the first place, if he had secrets like these.) she consistently treats her oldest more like a partner or peer than as her child, which considering hawke is always described as being very similar to their father… I mean I totally see how that could be easy to slip into for her after he died especially, but it doesn't make it any less fucked up or unfair.

the real leandra in legacy is. she is SO absurdly self-centered, if you really pay attention. I don't want to keep dunking on her because I don't think she's like this on purpose, but it boggles my mind. if you do the quest in act 1 she gets so upset and overwhelmed that the kids just sort of sit there like :( at the end, which adds to the trend that through the game you constantly see hawke comforting leandra, and you pretty much never see leandra comforting hawke, beyond some light vaguely encouraging comments in passing. if you do legacy in act 2 while she's still alive hawke comes to her, tentatively asking if malcolm ever spoke to her about any of it -- clearly requesting some sort of emotional support or help to make sense of it. she then expresses her side of it, but never once does she say anything to the effect of 'hey that was a lot to go through, are you okay after all that?'.

instead she essentially hands them the responsibility of having a good life, to repay what malcolm did for all of them. and in theory that's not the worst takeaway I suppose, malcolm probably would want them all to be happy, but in the moment it only feels like more expectation heaped upon you somehow? especially since you don't really get to express anything about how it made you feel before she goes to the 'ah no use complaining' zone (after SHE got to express her grief at feeling like she's losing more and more of that old life, and hawke barely got to say anything fhsfalkjfs). in general she really doesn't do much like. parenting, does she haha. there is so much love there in that relationship, and yet so little comfort. Oh, those days. All of us, in that simple place. Well, that's neither here nor there, is it. This life, we have to make the best of it. And thanks to you, and him, I will. Oh well, mum, I'm uh. I'm glad you feel better after that, at least. Nice to be of service.

it's varric's ghost-leandra who actually acknowledges what a burden hawke has taken on, that shows an understanding of why they're doing it, acknowledges the loss they've been through and also reassures them in their sense of belonging that still can't be taken from them, despite it all -- The best of him is still with you. The best of all of us. It's what makes you try so hard. You'll always have that. We'll always be family. (you can't take 'loved' away, huh.) you get a bit more of a reconciliation/reconnection between hawke and their dad's memory by being reminded he got like this too, you know (implicitly you're not alone). varric through leandra is the one who tells them what they probably would have wanted and needed to hear from a parent right then -- It's going to be alright. that's what Hawke, The Champion means to everyone else, and for once they get to be the one to hear it. except only in a kind dream that never really happened. I. it. hmmmmmm. crushing. that is crushing. but also so incredibly tender from varric's side, and so moving to me that he's seen all this stuff and so desperately wants to give them that comfort. anyway DA2 is about love in some of the realest and thus messiest and most human ways I've ever seen and it makes my brain go wild it's my favorite game of all time goodnight

[saltywinteradult]

Anon needs to understand there’s more than one way to be a bad parent, Viserys and Rhaenyra are proof of this.

Viserys enabled his daughter to extreme measures, all he had to do was send Harwin away the minute Jace was born but he buried his head in the sand instead. Rhaenyra wasn’t exactly discreet either, she was very openly sleeping with Harwin for the whole court to see and was emboldened to have THREE back to back pregnancies because she knew her father wouldn’t stop her. How is this good parenting? A good father would have taught his daughter actions have consequences.

Rhaenyra is no better, through her relationship with Harwin she shows her sons they can do whatever the hell they want with 0 consequence and this has long term repercussions. Luke openly mocks the boy he DISABLED, Jace breaks his betrothal to Baela, they do whatever the hell they want because they know their mother will enable them.

Say it louder for the people in the back, anon!

Viserys set a terrible example of parenthood for Rhaenyra. Considering that, it's not surprising that she would become just as much of an enabler to her own kids. The cycles do be cycling after all. That's a large part of this story. It makes me sad to see that aspect of the story, and of Rhaenyra's character, go ignored by her fans. Then again, the Team Black stans don't acknowledge that Viserys was a terrible father either, so I don't know what I expected.

Slight tangent here, but I would like to add that not only would a good father teach his daughter that actions have consequences, a good king would've taught his heir that actions have consequences.

As entitled as Rhaenyra is, her view of herself as exceptional isn't entirely unfounded. She's a princess. She's a dragonrider. She's the first female heir to the throne. She is exceptional in a lot of ways. But no one has bothered to teach her that that exceptional position 1) does not make her inherently better than anyone else, and 2) comes with responsibility. Viserys's and subsequently Rhaenyra's enabling would've been bad enough if they were just regular people, but they're the ruling family of Westeros. Their family dysfunction and infighting literally have consequences for the entire country. That means it's exponentially more important for them to not make decisions that lead to family dysfunction and infighting. That is so obvious I feel like I shouldn't even have to say it.

Viserys marrying Alicent and then treating her and their children like shit shows he clearly didn't understand this, so it's not surprising to me that Rhaenyra didn't learn this either. Hell, Viserys literally enables and supports Rhaenyra in breaking the law! Rhaenyra knows that advocating for her bastards, who everyone knows are bastards, to inherit over trueborn heirs is treason. Viserys knows this too and he supports her anyway. Why wouldn't Rhaenyra assume that she can do whatever the hell she wants? Why wouldn't she adopt that same mindset for her own children? Of course someone raised on toxic Targaryen exceptionalism and by an extremely enabling parent isn't gonna grow up to be a good person, a good parent, or a good ruler! Again, the cycles are cycling. That's the point. These are all perfectly realistic flaws for Rhaenyra to have and perfectly realistic mistakes for her to make. But they are flaws. They are mistakes. Not acknowledging that does her character and the story a huge disservice.

[throatgoatwill]

I've always asked myself how (realistically) a hannibal and will kiss scene would be like in the actual series. how would bryan make it work as naturally and organically as their relationship's development through the seasons.

I'd never arrived at an answer that seemed right to me, and even reached the point of thinking a kiss scene wouldn't add much because their dynamic was already miles beyond such a thing. BUT. I think I just stumbled upon the best answer. At least to me. Idk, it just really synced with my interpretations of their love.

Ok so i've just watched hannibal (2001) and if you haven't already, I really recommend you to do so!!! bryan put SO many references to it on the series, and it's just incredibly satisfying to connect the dots in regards of the creative process of the series. - that said, the majority of the references that made their way into the show, were dialogues between hannibal and clarice, wich later became some of our favorite hannigram scenes.

and at the very final scenes of the movie, I was caught completely of guard by clarice and hannibal's kiss, and not only because of the kiss itself, but the whole context and build up towards it, and the events that followed. It was fucking perfect. And it really hurt me to wonder if bryan was planning to recreate that scene with hannibal and will, because it would fit SO WELL..... I swear, it would've been beautiful and even more heartbreaking than the original.

Especially because of these specific lines:

"Tell me, Clarice, would you ever say to me, 'Stop. If you loved me, you'd stop'?"

"Not in a thousand years."

"Not in a thousand years... that's my girl."

COULD WE EVEN SURVIVE SUCH THING AS HANNIBAL SAYING THOSE WORDS TO WILL??? LIKE???? "...That's my boy." ARE YOU KIDDING MEEEEEE.

And it gets even fucking better because, later, when clarice cuffs their hands together to prevent hannibal from running away, he threatens to cut of her hand, but just at the very last second before doing so, he ponders quickly, a single tear making it's way across his cheek as he says "this is really gonna hurt." and he follows up by amputating his own hand.

and we just know he is actually talking about being separated from her again, the pain it would inflict on him.

and if bryan had had the time to recreate that and adapt it to hannibal and will, that line would be about how it would hurt both of them, as it is: they're conjoined, not sure if either could survive separation.

here's the entire scene if you got curious, I really recommend watching it, it's beautifully made.

[gb-patch]

Hi! I saw your ask about skin tones and honestly, that is very much a barebones excuse to not include skintones in your game. You act as though adding skintones to a sprite would be a complete hand-drawn new asset when it would quite literally be filling in a pre drawn base for both Opal and the mc. Not only that but you potentially have thousands of mc outfits you promised for specific tier havers on the kickstarter. And then for 250,000 dollars, you're telling me we'll get more colors but not even 2 or 4 skintones when there are games with Less funding who have more skintones? Especially considering OL:B&A had the exact same amount of skintones and I could count all the afro centric hairstyles in that game on my two hands. I rather have more skintones than just pale, peach, olive, tan, brown and dark brown (most of which screams a 2000s foundation line of tones) than have more hair or clothing colors. I'm sorry, I love your games, I really do but that's an extremely lazy and abhorrent response from you and I am extremely disappointed.

"Hi. I just saw the post about you not adding in more skintones. I really hope this doesn't come across as rude or demanding but I find your reasoning for not being able to add them...lackluster at best. With all due respect, you set this goal for 250k, over three times the original goal you set for the kickstarter, the idea that somehow you can promise an additional set of darker colours for the clothes, accesories hair and eyes alongside the additional MC pieces people are going to request but not an additional skintone because of Opal seems a little ridiculous. I'm not an experienced artist but I do know how art files tend to work and I imagine adding additional colours to Opal's base design wouldn't be an extreme undertaking. In fact, by contrast, the work to add more colours to the clothes and hairs seems much more labourous considering the amount of them and the fact that some of the clothes have subcolours.

Again, I do hope I don't come accross as rude but I just feel like this announcement was highly dissapointing, especially considering the fact that the additional colours are currently the biggest goal for the kickstarter at the moment" There were two replies, so I put them together. I hope that's alright.

I understand. It would be bad and make no sense if that didn’t happen. I can say that this has nothing to do with funding. I'm not gonna attach more skin tones to a stretch goal, that’s not fair. It’ll be done whenever it can be regardless of what happens with the Kickstarter.

The other colors for hair and such is something I confirmed can be done by our programmer ahead of time using a color picker system in coding.

The situation as it stands today for Opal is that I personally don't have the skills to recolor her myself, the artist we have is in a situation where it would be unkind to increase how much work they have to do (it'd be easier if even less work could be on them), and while another artist could be hired- that hasn't happened at this point. So, saying it "could happen but maybe not" is cautious development process. It’s how it went with both the Cove Patreon Bonus Moments, where I pretended for months that it may or may not happen while working on it behind the scenes because I wasn’t sure how long I’d need to finish it and was worried it could be delayed for long stretches of time.

Being realistic, it is virtually a 100% certainly that before the game comes out, the skin tones will be expanded. There is no good reason why it wouldn’t. I was waiting until things got to a better point in production before coming out to officially say that it’s happening.

And I could’ve said it’s extremely likely but we’re not able to do it quite yet and avoided making anyone feel hurt. I wish my way of handling it hadn’t made the people who believed in our games sad. The reason why I didn’t is that I just can’t help but be averse to making promises I can’t do/the team can’t do and so have to rely on something else working out at some point in the future, even if it is entirely likely that it will.

That’s because I know that these things will make a lot of people happy. I want the excitement and any praise that might come to not happen until the goal has been achieved or is on the way to being achieved for sure. To a degree it’s helpful for players to have confidence in what the company is promoting, but it’s mainly to help with my own habit of catastrophizing. I tend to believe bad things could happen and I’ll let people down even when it’s so unlikely it’s not worth considering. I consider it anyway. And so, you get this kind of long-term hedging before the feature people hoped for suddenly appears. Even now my compulsion is to add a caveat that “there’s still a chance something (I don’t even know what) could happen and it won’t be added so don’t thank me yet” despite me already coming out with the truth that there’s every intention to have it added. I’m sorry to have disappointed you and made you feel disregarded by doing this. Hopefully when the skin options are expanded people will be able to enjoy the game a lot more than how it is with the current demo. And thanks for taking the time to let me know what you thought rather than giving up on the project entirely.