I'm still baffled at Dobson buying ISBNs for his books, and then going to comic book stores asking them to sell his books for him. Who told him to do this? Momson? wasn't she connected, or knew of a publisher friend? Idk maybe she got sick of putting her neck on the line with the other times he shot her friends down for work. Was he hoping to have some break-out success, like an "It all started when a young man went from store to store with a book and a dream!" I'm inclined to think so.
Dobson is not a salesman, clearly. His appearance plays a part. That's sad to say but it is true that our appearance plays a lot in how we are perceived. I can picture him waddling into a comic shop, his "Winning personality"/S on full display with that crusty fucking fedora with some shlubby clothes to go with it.
I'm inclined to believe his level of laziness he never sat down to make character sheets or write down the lore of his characters. No script for each issue of his comic. So when asked by, let's say, comic book shop employees what the hell his shit was about, he'd stutter and stammer through the whole ordeal.
Him buying ISBNs was probably because him doing so made him feel like he was a “real” writer/artist, I would assume.
And given both his introvertedness and his tendency to be snide or condescending to people he considers below him for having “incorrect opinions”, I’d imagine he sucked as a salesman.
Like imagine what would have happened if a comic shop owner said something like “tell me why I would put your comic on the shelf in place of, say, this comic with the sexy woman on it”. Knowing how Dobson is? It would lead to him getting kicked out of the store or something.
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so I really didn't mean to just make 4 episodes and dip for like 3 months. I legit have 2 scripts written and a half dozen comics / graphic novels in the queue. it was going to happen. but then I got a little overloaded with work and decided to take a 2-3 week break to prerecord some episodes.
during that break, something ridiculous happened.
I accidentally purchased the entire contents of a comic book store???
I'm going to discuss this in more detail on the podcast itself (because it deserves a whole ass or multiple whole ass episodes), but here are the basics...
my friendly local comic book store went out of business VERY suddenly. I'm talking it was open and operating as per usual and then one day they were like "we're closing down, everything needs to be gone immediately. big sales starting tomorrow."
which, you know, sucks.
I had just gotten back into comics and had been going to this store for a few months.
every week. every wednesday. for months.
I was becoming a part of the local community. learning about comics. spending too much money on them. the usual.
it was awesome.
so to have this happen so abruptly was jarring. I spoke with the owner and main employee who I'd gotten to know, and there is a bigger story here (which we're saving for the pod, sorry folks), but essentially they announced it Tuesday evening and needed to be out by end of day Friday.
at first I was just like "aw man, what a bummer." but then my traitorous brain had an idea.
~ you are a vendor at a store. yoooou could buy some comics. yooooooou could sell them. youuuuuuu. ~
me.
I had some cash in my savings. not enough, I thought, to buy them out. but I could get some cheap inventory. woo deals! and whatever.
so on Wednesday I go talk to the owner in person.
yes, he will sell me some comics for cheap. yes he will also sell me some of the custom built shelves for said comics. but it needed to be done IMMEDIATELY.
ok I can get some movers I say. they will get the shelves for me.
they need to do it tomorrow he says. "we'll see if the doors are even open tomorrow or if the pm changes the locks." he shrugs. I am concerned. but I move forward anyway.
movers come and get the shelves (thank fuck the locks weren't changed? and thank fuck for last minute movers omg). they are brought to my house and put in my garage. I go back to the flcs after work and pack up boxes of comics. customers continue to shuffle in and buy comics too. yay deals and whatever.
customers are sad about the closing. I am sad. we do not understand. (dear reader, I later understood, but in that moment none of us knew what the fuck was happening.)
I have the shelves. I have some books (not a lot though, and those shelves are BIG). I am now concerned about two things. number 1, will the other local stores come and swipe all the inventory out from under my nose leaving me with very large shelves and not enough inventory? and number two, how much is this going to cost me?
you see in all of the hubbub we had not agreed on a price for the comics. I paid for the shelves and for a few initial comics. I had not paid for the rest. we weren't sure how much would be left over. it's hard determine price ahead of time. so many comics, you see, and how do we count them all? (answer: we don't.)
and there were many, reader. many.
now I had known for a while that the owner wanted to sell the store. he had a very high asking price. very very very high. I could not afford the whole fucking store at his price. or even half of his price. or even a quarter of his price. or even an eighth of his price. maaaaaaaybe I could do 1/10th?
so how in the fuck was I going to afford the rest of the inventory? well I assumed I wouldn't and I wasn't.
and you know what they say about assuming.
...something about becoming donkeys? I digress.
so Wednesday I bought some comics. Thursday I got the shelves and some more comics. here comes Friday. there are still many many comics. the other stores did come buy stuff, but there was still so much left over.
HOW MUCH WILL THIS COST ME DAMMIT.
...
...
turns out, not a whole lot.
the owner was like "fuck it" and sold me everything for very cheap. he kept saying "I was just going to donate it anyway" – which maybe you shouldn't say to the person you want to pay you for the stuff? but ok?
not only did I get comics, I got 4 cardboard cutouts of superheroes, a small handful of toys, some framed artwork, folding tables, a spinny old school rack, paper bags, a price gun, a sandwich board, and other random shit.
because it needed to be OUT.
ASAmotherfuckingP.
it was exhausting. I moved so many heavy boxes filled with books. I brought them to my house. I didn't know what to do. I was expecting a handful of comics.
I got the whole damn store.
at first, you know, like an idiot, I estimated that I got 3 (maybe 4?) thousand comics. and 3k comics is no joke.
after going through them and preparing them for my store, we reevaluated. we think there are actually about 10,000 comics and a couple hundred books.
I didn't even pay 1/10th of the store's asking price.
this post is long, and there is more to the story. like how we dealt with the inventory (yes we, I got some help thank fuck), the random stuff we found in the comics, what all actually happened with the closing, etc. but I'll leave you with this.
you are me. you just spent a significant but not devastating amount of money on 10k comics and some VERY large shelves. it is all in your garage. it got there in a matter of 40-60 hours. you can no longer park your car in your garage. all of the comics need to be priced, and most need new bags and boards. due to the speed in which we had to move, the comics were not boxed up in order. they are not organized anymore. this is a massive undertaking. the project of all projects.
you stand in the garage wondering what just happened. what did you do. why did you do this. how is this your life now. there are so many boxes. this is so much work. but you're way to deep in it now. there is no return.
reader. dearest reader. in this situation, if you are me, what would you have done?
genuinely I am curious. plz let me know.
and thanks for reading.
(this is actually real and not a short story. I have thousands of comic books that I didn't originally intend to buy. I accidentally bought a comic book store. what have I done. the floor is comics.)
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