#I never export my wips

[benetnvsch]

this image was beamed into my skull right as I was tryna sleep so had to sketch it rq- may clean it up later- may not lol

[hirodraga]

today i offer you more hellrider art. tomorrow? who knows.

[sakuramoussy]

Way to many projects dump

some old sketches I'll never finish, some I plan to, some I need to but lost motivation to (*cough cough*Whistoldmap*coughs*)

And the flat color of Xiao's mask from a drawing that is definitely already dont and posted

[ooglyboooglybitxh]

𝐍𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫 𝐊𝐧𝐞𝐰 𝐈 𝐍𝐞𝐞𝐝𝐞𝐝

mom!shuri x mom!reader

contains: MEGA FLUFF,sfw, lesbian mothers,male baby

summary: shuri and reader have a child

𝚁𝚎𝚖𝚒𝚗𝚍𝚎𝚛𝚜: Reader is Dominicanã and black,Childs Name is Nahir (Nah-here), Nahir is 7 months, Shuri got reader pregnant. Orange Is Reader aka Y/n, Purple Is Shuri, Nahir Is Blue.

🧸💙🐳🐢🧸💙🐳🐢🧸💙🐳🐢🧸💙🐳

𝟡:𝟛𝟟:𝟙𝟚 𝔸𝕄

(yes so specific😂)

Nahir crys from his crib besides his mothers bed

Y/n groans from hearing her son whining

“Baby” Y/n groans to Shuri

Shuri wakes up and sits up and looks at her son

“what's wrong, hm“ Shuri says to Nahir as she picks him up

Shuri immediately makes a face as she smell Nahir’s diaper and takes him to the changing table and begins to change him

Y/n sits up ash she puts her hair in a ponytail and walks over to Shuri and Nahir

“Morning“ Y/n says against Shuri’s shoulder as she smiles

“Hey“ Shuri says not looking at Y/n trying to focus on their child “Eh! Hey! no kicking“ Shuri says scolding Nahir

*Nahir giggles* and Shuri smiles and shakes her head as she throws away the dirty diaper

“He's so goofy“ Y/n jokes “He takes after you“ shuri says after washing her hands walking over to Y/n kissing her lips

“Morning breath“ Y/n warns Shuri, and in response Shuri sucks her teeth

Y/n goes to brush her teeth bringing her phone with her

*Nahir Whines* as Y/n walks into the bathroom

(A/N: they have a bathroom in their room which- lemme just put a picture)

(So basically Nahir can still see Y/n he’s just overreacting🤣)

“I'm right here junior“Y/n ressures Nahir

Shuri walks in with Nahir in her arms

“see she's fine she's right here“ Shuri says to her son

Y/n wips Nahir’s tears and kisses his forehead

“Estoy bien, no hace falta llorar“(“I'm okay no need to cry“) Y/n says to Nahir as she begins to brush her teeth

“mmmm“ Nahir whines reaching for Y/n

“she's busy unyana“(son) shuri says kissing her son's cheek

🧸💙🐳🐢🧸💙🐳🐢🧸💙🐳🐢🧸💙🐳

𝟙𝟘:𝟘𝟞:𝟜𝟝 𝔸𝕄

__________________________

Everyone is in the living room.

Nahir is playing with his toys and watching “Spidey And His Amazing Friends“

(A/N: me personally I will never turn on Cocomelon for my children that's just me 🤷🏾‍♀️)

turning away from the TV Nahir crawls to Shuri leg, putting his arms over her knee

Shuri looks down to see her son looking at her and picks him up and gently sets him on her lap

“hm” Nahir hands her his stuffed turtle

“You want me to hold it?”Shuri says taking the turtle from him

Nahir grabs his baby blue teddy bear and gives it to Shuri

He also picks up his toy robot and begins playing with it

Y/n recording it all

Shuri catches it and just chuckles softly

“So cute” Y/n says saving the video to her snapchat memories and exporting it to her phone

and Nahir just laughs

“what are you laughing at” Shuri says tickling Nahir

🧸💙🐳🐢🧸💙🐳🐢🧸💙🐳🐢🧸💙🐳

𝟙𝟘:𝟚𝟛:𝟚𝟜 𝔸𝕄

__________________________

Nahir crawls to the kitchen and Y/n saw him

“Hungry Mhijo?” (son) Y/n picks up Nahir and brings him in the kitchen and gently sets him down in his high chair.

Y/n grabs two gerber baby puff containers “blueberry or banana” she says putting them on his little table

(A/N: GERBER BABY PUFFS BUSSSSS😤😤)

per usual he hits the blueberry one

“eh” Nahir grunts hitting the blueberry one

“should’ve even asked” Y/n says under her breath

Shuri come up the stairs from her lab walking to the kitchen

“you’re eating now eh?” She says playfully pushing his cheek and sitting on the counter

Y/n pours puffs on his table and closes the container and Nahir starts to eat

Y/n walks to the couch slamming herself onto the cushion grunting loudly

Nahir notices and side-eyes her then goes back to eating

Shuri laughs at his face expression

“what?” Y/n asks looking up from the couch

“he side-eyed you”she says chuckling

“boujee ass child” Y/n says mumbling under her breath

🧸💙🐳🐢🧸💙🐳🐢🧸💙🐳🐢🧸💙🐳

𝟙𝟚:𝟜𝟙:𝟛𝟞 ℙ𝕄

____________________________________

Nahir fell asleep on shuri’s chest Y/n notices and walks toward Shuri

“He’s asleep” Y/n tells Shuri

Shuri looks down at Nahir “Oh i didn’t notice” she says softly petting his curls

Shuri carries him to their room, before she sets him in the crib she kisses his forehead

“Ndiyakuthandana, unyana” (“i love you, son”) she says then softly placing him inside his crib putting the blanket over his chest

Y/n walks into the bedroom seeing Shuri watch their son sleep

She leans down behind her and puts her right arm over Shuri’s neck

“you’re so attached to him” she says “and its adorable” she smirks softly

Shuri giggles “He is my child, my everything” she says moving hair from Nahir’s face, then laying her head on Y/n’s chest.

“You know…this all would’ve been possible without you” she says looking up at Y/n “I love you…so much” she says kissing Y/n passionately

Y/n pulls away softly “i love you more amór”(love) she she says as she cups her cheek

🧸💙🐳🐢🧸💙🐳🐢🧸💙🐳🐢🧸💙🐳

____________________________________

yall im sorry if you thought it was short

but i tried my best to make it long as possible 😅

but if you enjoyed and want to see more of Nahir, request and let me knowwww

[jinxxsims]

Full disclaimer to begin with. This is just how I do conversions. There are no doubt other ways, possibly even better ways to convert objects, but this is the way I know how. This post is going to be long and image heavy and I am going to walk through it slowly so nothing is missed. If any of it is still confusing once you've gotten through it, feel free to send me an ask and I will answer to the best of my ability. Part One of the tutorial under the cut!

Programs You Will Need (and links where you can find them):

SimPE

Sims 4 Studio

Blender

Milkshape

Not Strictly Necessary, But Certainly Nice To Have:

The Compressorizer by JFade or @lazyduchess edit which can be found here

A Photo Editing Program - I use Photoshop, but GIMP is a completely free, open-source program and it would work just as well for recolors or texture editing.

Now onto the tutorial!

Step One - Launch Sims 4 Studio. If it is your first time launching Sims 4 Studio or if you had launched it before without maybe knowing what to do, click on "Settings" and make sure everything is pointing where it needs to.

If it's not, the objects from the Sims 4 games, EPs, and kits you own won't show once you get into the studio. Once you've adjusted the paths, hit "Save."

Step Two - From the main screen of Sims 4 Studio, select the "Object" header.

Leave it on "Standalone Recolor." Once you hit the "Object" header, the studio will begin loading all the Sims 4 meshes in your game. It will just take a few seconds for the objects to populate.

Step Three - Choose the object you want to convert.

You can use the "Game Pack" or the Search fields (which I highlighted above) to narrow down the items instead of being bombarded with all of them at once. For this tutorial, I'm going to be converting the "Caress Chair" from the Base Game.

@sims4t2bb is the most amazing database of 4t2 content. Here you can find the various packs and kits and see what has been converted already, so you don't end up converting something that's already out there available for download. Seriously, this is an amazing resource. @lafeeverte-sims and @twentyfourfirst-sims update this database in practically real time. I don't know how they do it. This is easily one of the single greatest resources for the 4t2 converters out there. Bookmark it and check it often.

Step Four - Select the item you're going to convert and hit "next" down in the bottom, right-hand corner.

Once you've clicked "next," you'll be prompted to give your file a name and choose where to save it. THIS FILE IS USELESS. It will not be used at any point during the conversion process. In fact, you can delete it the moment Sims 4 Studio creates it. If having a lot of files around confuses you more, get rid of it right away.

For my own part, I keep it around because I have the short term memory of a goldfish. I use it to set up what I'm eventually going to name my mesh file. So in this particular instance, I named this pointless file jinxxsims-4t2-base-caresschair because it is the Caress Chair and it is from the Base Game. I know, super original, right? It works for me though.

You could name this thing xyz, it wouldn't matter. As I said, the file is never going to be used. Give it a name, hit "save," and Sims 4 Studio will spend a few moments getting the file up and ready.

Step Five - It's time to gather the components of the object. First, let's get the mesh.

Choose the "Meshes" tab. The LOD 0 (High) field should already be selected. Don't change it. Finally, choose "Export Mesh." You'll be prompted to give your mesh a name. I always just name mine "mesh," because I want there to be no doubt about what files I have floating around in my WIP folder.

Once you click "save," the game will spend a few seconds extracting the mesh as a blender file. Once it's done, go to the "Texture" tab.

Step Six - Gather the textures.

Highlight one of the color swatches at the top of the window. The first one will always be the "mesh" color. Click "export." You'll be prompted to give your texture a name. I always save the first one as "mesh."

Click on each swatch and extract the textures the same way. You will be prompted to save each swatch when exporting them. I name all of mine in the simplest way possible.... rc-1, rc-2, and so on.

KEEP IT SIMPLE. Especially when just getting started. Feel free to get fancy once you get the hang of things, but when starting out... simple is best.

This is what my WIP folder looks like after I've exported all the textures. Regardless of what you're converting, yours should look similar.

Step Seven - Double-click the "mesh" file to have it open in Blender.

Full disclosure. Blender absolutely baffles me. I know there are people who can create objects from scratch in it and do other, all kinds of impressive things, but... that is not me. I use it for roughly sixty seconds, just to get the mesh in a format that Milkshape will accept, and that's it.

The first thing we need to do is eliminate the white boxes beneath the chair until the only thing left is the mesh. On the right hand side of the window, there are listings of what the mesh is currently composed of. "s4studio_mesh_0," "s4studio_mesh_1," and "s4studio_mesh_2." Next to each, there is what looks like a little eyeball. Click the eyeball and what that part of the mesh is will disappear.

In this case, when you click the eyeball next to "s4studio_mesh_0," the big white box disappears.

So, we know that "s4studio_mesh_0" is really just that white box. Go ahead and delete it by right clicking "s4studio_mesh_0" and choosing "Delete" from the drop-down menu.

Next, click the eyeball next to "s4studio_mesh_1" and the tiny white squares under each leg disappear, so we know that that layer of the mesh is just more white boxes. Right click "s4studio_mesh_1" and choose "Delete" from the drop-down menu.

You're left with just the mesh on its own, and that's perfect! In my experience, the white boxes are almost always on layers 0 and 1 if there are 2 sets of white boxes.

Step Eight - Export the mesh as an OBJ.

Go to File > Export > Wavefront (.obj)

A panel with settings will appear on the left side of the screen. Leave the default settings, but uncheck "Write Materials" beneath "Include UVs." If you leave it checked, that's ultimately fine. All it does is create an unnecessary file in your WIP folder. I uncheck it because the less unnecessary files you have floating around, the better, because there's less of a chance of confusing yourself.

Set your file path to your WIP folder (that's the black line in the image above) and give your mesh a name if you want to rename it (I just leave mine as mesh) and then click "Export OBJ." Once you've done so, you can exit Blender and delete the Blender file that Sims 4 Studio created.

This is what my WIP folder looks like now:

Step Nine - Launch SimPE. Once the program has opened, launch the Object Workshop. I have mine in a side panel, but you can also launch it by going to Tools > Object Creation > Object Workshop. When the Workshop launches, it will ask you to choose between "Start" or "Open...".

"Start" is for cloning and recoloring Maxis objects. "Open..." is for cloning and recoloring custom objects. When doing conversions of things like chairs, tables, beds, etc., choose "Start" and clone from Maxis objects. Clone from "Open..." when creating objects Maxis doesn't really have in the catalog... like the sprinkler I just shared, the single-tile workout bags I shared, or like an end table with multiple slots when you don't want to add the slots in yourself.

Since this is just a basic dining chair, we're going to choose "Start." This will take a little while for SimPE to load the whole Sims 2 catalog. Just be patient. When it's finished loading, you'll be presented with a list that looks like this:

In this instance, I'm going to choose "Seating" and then "Dining Room" since I'm converting a dining chair. This will make sure that the chair I'm converting has all the functions of a dining chair... like it will be pushed in under a desk or a table rather than be stationary like a living chair.

How do you know which object to clone? Honestly, sometimes it's a bit of a crapshoot. IgnorantBliss on MTS has compiled a list of easy-to-clone objects here that you can download and reference when cloning. I used it A LOT when I first started converting.

When you select an item to clone, most of the time it will tell you which EP it is from. I think it's generally most accepted to clone from Base Game items if there is a Base Game item available to clone from, because the most people will be able to use it, but in my own personal opinion... at this stage in the game and time, clone whatever works for you. The Sims 2 is abandonware. Everyone who wants to play the Sims 2 has access to the full game, with all its EPs for free.

OldGamesDownload works in partnership with the Internet Archive to preserve games that have been abandoned by their creators and keep them available to the public. All Sims 2 (and Sims 1!) games can be found on their website, free of charge.

I say all of that just to say... if you clone a dining chair from Apartment Life rather than the base game... that's fine! You're not obligated to meet everyone's needs, and if someone doesn't have Apartment Life but really wants your dining chair, the means to get it are out there. Create for yourself and your own convenience first.

For this tutiorial, I'm going to clone the base game dining chair "Tea Party in Teak." Once I've highlighted it in the list, I'm going to choose "Next" at the top of the Object Workshop panel.

Step Ten - Clone the object. Under "Task," choose Clone in the drop down menu. My settings look like this:

Once yours match, choose "Start."

This will bring up a panel for you to choose the name, price, and catalog description for your item. Notice how I never told you to close Sims4Studio? That's because I go back to it now to copy the information from Sims 4.

In the Sims 4 Studio window, choose the "Catalog" subheading and copy the information over to SimPE.

I always add a line beneath the description with my screenname. If I'm converting CC from Sims 4 rather than EA content, I also always include the original creator's name. I would encourage others to do the same. This way, if there's a problem with something you shared, people know who to contact. Or, if someone gets a WCIF for an object you shared, it's easy for them to know who the maker is to help a fellow Simmer out. And if you convert someone else's object, it's just in good taste to give them the credit they are due.

Once you've given your object a title, price, and description, click "Finish" in the Object Workshop. You can also close Sims4Studio at this time.

Step Eleven - Finish preparing the clone and save your mesh.

The Scenegraph rename Wizard comes up after you hit finish. In the ModelName field, give your object a name. Not everyone does this, but I do, for neatness and clarity's sake. Once you've given it a name, click "Update," and all the values in the field will be adjusted.

Ta-da! Click "OK" and you'll be prompted to save your mesh. This is when I use that dummy file that I said you could delete immediately from Sims 4 Studio. I click it so it automatically names my new save, then I add -MESH at the end.

In this case, my save file is now jinxxsims-4t2-basegame-caresschair-MESH. I always do all capitalized "MESH" because I think there's less of a chance of anyone deleting the mesh accidentally when it's there all big and bold.

Click "Save" and SimPE will create the file for you. If you hung on to the dummy file like I did, at this point, you can delete it.

And that's where I'm ending "Part One" of this tutorial. I will work on "Part Two" which will take you the rest of the way through conversions later today and hopefully have it up tonight or tomorrow!

[physalian]

Writing with Executive Dysfunction (or how to lower the barrier of entry)

So you want to write a book, but all you have is a cool one-liner, a niche super power you want to explore, and the blurry image of a love interest with a two-syllable kind of name. You don’t know where to start, what to tackle first, how to jump in the deep end.

Can you write the ending first? What if you want this really cool gimmick in a fight scene but can’t write action to save your life? Do you start in media res or with a prologue, or with the character starting their daily routine? Do you write the villain’s POV first?

Or do you start with an outline, character sheets, a title, summary, your themes and motifs? How many pages and pages of worldbuilding notes should you have built up before you’re good to tackle the first page? You’ve heard time and again the critical importance of the first three sentences. The first chapter if your audience is generous.

The pressure mounts to be unique, but not try-hard, descriptive but not flowery, intriguing, but not confusing, all in the first hundred or so words. You sit there staring at the little blinking black line on your blank page… and the idea gets shelved for another day. It collects virtual dust in the backlogs of your computer, forgotten until you have to clear out space on your hard drive and stumble across unspent potential.

Everyone and their dog has their own bits of writing advice and I’m sure I’m about to echo tips that have been around the block once or twice, but there are a few I don’t see talked about enough.

Whether you suffer from severe procrastination, fear of failure before you even begin, the overwhelming limitlessness of choice, or just can’t sit down and dedicate any time to see what happens, this list might be for you.

1. Write Every Day

This is nothing new, but I’m going to tackle the implementation of such a habit over why it’s important. You already know why it’s important. Writing every day doesn’t demand a full page of a Word doc, or 200 words before you can get up and do something else. Sometime a witty dialogue exchange comes to mind while you’re doing dishes – write that down.

Or you saw a cool name for a character in a commercial – write that down.

Or you had a dream about your characters in a high-octane street chase – write down the synopsis.

Personally, I use Apple Notes. It’s free, I can log-in to iCloud through a browser and keep writing, and my phone is always with me. I have dedicated folders to sort which notes belong to which concepts.

Disclaimer: Apple Notes is meant for exactly that: Note taking. I take it to the extremes, but it’s not a word processer. It’s not meant for anything more strenuous than putting virtual pen to virtual paper.

I build up so many variations of scene ideas and concepts for character arcs that my ‘notes’ for any given book can be as long as a full-length novel. Most of the time, admittedly, those ideas get outdated fast as I move on to bigger and better things, but the point is this: I never would move on to better things if I didn’t have somewhere to start.

I have a personal grudge against OneDrive for a sync failure losing 20k words of a WIP, so most of my writing is done through Google Docs and saved to Google Drive. It’s not the most powerful word processor, but you don’t have to worry about formatting until the very end and can export later. It’s free, like Apple Notes (assuming you have an iPhone), and the smart phone app for Google programs works phenomenally better than the MS Word app – so once again, the barrier for being within reach of places to jot down ideas is lowered. My phone is always with me.

It doesn’t have to be digital – carry around a journal or a notebook or a legal pad if you want. Whatever gets your creative juices flowing. The point is to have somewhere to take all the ideas you have in your head and get them onto paper the moment inspiration strikes.

2. Writing is Supposed to be Fun

The dreaded writer’s block, scourge of authors everywhere. You’ve reached the point in your manuscript where you’ve caught up to the epic adventure you’ve written in your head. The little writer in your brain has gone on strike and you’re left in the doldrums of how to transition from one chapter to the next. One idea to the next. One scene, one line of dialogue.

Answer: Skip it.

Unless you have a hard deadline to make, writing is supposed to be fun. Your best work comes when you’re passionate about doing it, not when you’re holding your fingers hostage to put something on the page or else.

When you start getting frustrated, walk away. When you get stressed, walk away. The manuscript will still be there once you’ve slept on it for a day or two and you’ll be glad for it. Or, write a different scene. Write a hypothetical scene (more on this point later). Write anything you want and come back to the hard parts later. The gaps will fill eventually, and if they don’t—consider what about that transition or scene is so hard and consider axing it entirely. If it’s frustrating for you, it’s probably boring or unimportant to the reader.

3. Script it

My favorite writer’s crutch is to make a skeleton of the scene I want to have, fill it with dialogue, and move on. The pretty thematic narrative can come later. It’s halfway between an outline and a first draft and, for me, someone to whom dialogue comes easier than narrative, this is another barrier removed to letting creativity flow.

I don’t have to think about dialogue tags or movement of a scene or how exactly I want to structure a sentence or describe the setting. Scripting lets me sus out the pacing of a given scene, test run a conversation I have in my head to see if it might really work before investing all the time and effort of a fully fleshed out first draft, only to erase it all later.

You can do this mid-narrative, too. If you just want to skip over a couple lines that aren’t coming naturally to you, script a vague sense of stage directions until you get to easier narrative and come back later.

When I say scripting, mine look something like this:

Character A (ChA): [position within the setting, tone of voice, any notable gesture or action that enhances the dialogue] “Dialogue.” [specific dialogue tag, if necessary] … (often a paragraph break) … “Dialogue.” Character B (ChB): “Dialogue.” [emotion, reaction, details about the setting that are now important, new revelations by the narrating POV] … “Dialogue,” [action. Tonal shift. Movement] ChA: “Dialogue.” [action] … (scene continues)

In practice:

… ChA: [kicks back against the wall of the room, arms crossed. Annoyed, waiting for ChB to speak first, but they don’t] “Why didn’t you tell me you wanted to leave?” [head tilts, still waiting on an answer ChB isn’t giving] “All you had to do was ask.” ChB: “You were having fun,” [quiet, wringing their hands in their lap on the edge of the bed] “You wanted me there. So I was there.” [huffs, flips their hair back. Not sure how many times they’ve had this conversation. Will always hate parties, not going to suddenly like them just because ChA is there] “You can either have me there, or make sure I’m comfortable. You can’t have both.” ChA: “So now I’m the bad guy.” [foot thumps on the floor like a judge’s gavel] …

Scripting also lets you fill a scene with multiple new characters before you figure out their names or descriptions, tagging their lines with the bare minimum. I often test out entire action scenes (which I loathe writing) in script form, so I know I’m satisfied with the pacing, blocking, and amount of movement before I lock it in and write the first draft of actual narrative. It also forces you to make sure your characters are taking actions and not just sitting at a table like talking mannequins.

Transitioning from script to narrative can be mighty tedious sometimes if you try to fit in chunks of narrative in the exact places you left on your initial pass. Fictional prose is organic, so let it breathe.

Maybe you let a character monologue for too long, or they have too much movement in a scene that becomes unnatural and clunky. Or the entire scene ran away from you because the conversation was just that good. Whatever the case, a script, bare minimum, gets your foot in the door.

4. Write Fanfic

I like sci-fi and fantasy. I also like taking my sci-fi and fantasy characters and throwing them into ‘fanfics’ to test out relationships and start to get a feel for what makes them unique from the rest of the cast.

Sometimes the setting changes to something mundane, sometimes it’s a hypothetical scene that the current pacing of the narrative just doesn’t have room for, or it’s a flashback you’ll never include but want to have written so it’s concrete when you reference it in the present.

It also helps you fall in love with your characters when you can write them without consequence, doing whatever, doing whoever, saying whatever, going wherever. In fanfic, their personalities can start to write themselves and you discover them as you write them. And, hey, sometimes you come up with a concept so good, you change the entire real narrative around to fit it.

All your attention doesn’t have to be on the story you’re actually writing.

5. Keep All of Your Deleted Scenes

I keep so many of mine, the ‘deleted scenes’ doc of one book is 40k words longer than the actual manuscript, filled with numerous variations of the same scene written over and over again in vain trying to keep something that no longer works.

Keep them for several reasons:

It reminds you of how far you’ve come.

You can pick through the bones for bits of dialogue and setting descriptors even if the majority is trashed.

You remind yourself of what didn’t work before, so you don’t fall in that same trap again.

If you change your mind, all you have to do is copy-paste it back in.

6. Remember First Drafts are First Drafts

Let the word spew flow forth from your fingers and don’t look back and start questioning every decision and all its flaws until your creativity tank starts sputtering on empty. It’s supposed to be messy, it’s supposed to have plot holes and typos and inconsistencies and things to fact-check. If you start hyper-fixating on making sure your manuscript has absolutely no errors before moving on to the next chapter, it will never get written, and you’ll convince yourself you’re a terrible writer.

Writing is easy. Revisions are hard. Just as storytelling doesn’t have to be linear, neither does the writing process. If that critical first line just won’t come to you, stuff a mediocre one in its place and move on. Write the ending first. Write all the romantic entanglements first. Write the big climactic argument first and figure out how the rest falls into place around your beautiful centerpiece.

But remember: You do, at some point, have to write the hard stuff. Hopefully, when the time comes, you look at all the rest you’ve written and are proud enough of your progress that those daunting scenes that looked impossible before become much more approachable now. Do it for your future readers who want to know how it ends. Do it for your characters. Do it for you.

[pushing500]

✨Gracie's Rimworld Modlist✨

(for the Children of Ecthuctu run)

Here are all my current mods in order. Only a scant two-hundred and sixteen of them! Once again it's all hand-typed because I am a bit rubbish at computer stuff and don't know how to export modlists. Enjoy!! xoxo

Prepatcher (a mod manager thing)

Harmony (I think this is just for performance)

What’s That Mod? (tells you what mod stuff is from. VERY USEFUL)

Vanilla Backgrounds Expanded (this is just cool for loading screens etc.)

Camera+ (for taking better screenshots)

Biomes! Fossils (I could build a dinosaur museum!!!)

Better ModMismatch Window (for if I do feel the need to mess with the modlist)

Mod Manager (I have lots of mods to manage)

RimPy Mod Manager Database (I don’t know if this needs to be active to use the RimPy application but I don’t wanna risk it)

HugsLib (I think this is just for performance)

Humanoid Alien Races (aliens are cool)

Tabula Rasa ( ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ )

Character Editor (so I could start with the colonists I had planned)

Vanilla Expanded Framework (I think this is just for performance)

JecsTools (I think this is just for performance)

Interaction Bubbles (To see what my lil’ guys are talking about)

CM Color Coded Mood Bar [1.1+] (helpful for spotting incoming mental breaks)

Childhood Backstories (so that babies born in my colony will have relevant backstories when they are all grown up)

Dubs Bad Hygiene (bathrooms cool)

Pathfinding Framework (makes the Biomes! mods work)

Doors Expanded (expands on the doors)

A Dog Said… Animal Prosthetics (animal bionics wooo)

LBE’s A Dog Said Easy Patcher (to help with all the animals mods woooo)

Vanilla Achievements Expanded (sometimes it gives me a serotonin)

Vanilla Fishing Expanded (a good food source when I’m not resorting to cannibalism)

Vanilla Races Expanded - Android (cool robot xenotype)

Vanilla Factions Expanded - Tribals (more tribal stuff)

ReGrowth: Core (framework for ReGrowth stuff)

ReGrowth: Tropical (adds new tropical plants and stuff)

Biomes! Core (the framework for the Biomes! mods)

Biomes! Islands (in case I wanted to reenact Castaway)

Vanilla Plants Expanded (more farm stuff hooray!)

Vanilla Plants Expanded - Succulents (for making the colony look pretty)

Vanilla Plants Expanded - More Plants (even MORE farm stuff!!)

Biomes! Prehistoric (dinosaurs :3)

Alpha Biomes (can never have enough biomes)

Alpha Mythology (adds mythological creatures)

Vanilla Psycasts Expanded (expands the psycasts)

Alpha Animals (even more pets!)

Alpha Genes (more xenotypes to play with and draw!)

Alpha Prefabs (pop-up buildings will be cool for a nomadic playthrough)

Allow Tool (easier to forbid and unforbid items)

BiomesKit (helps with placement of biomes on the planet I think)

[ATW] House Decor (for aesthetic purposes)

[KV] Impassable Map Maker (in case I want to make a colony on impassable mountains someday)

Vanilla Traits Expanded (I love hoarding traits)

Bundle Of Traits (give me ALL THE TRAITS)

[GMT] Trading Spot (to stop stupid traders keep walking in my house)

[NL] Facial Animation - WIP (they make funny faces :3) 

Vanilla Textures Expanded - [NL Facial Animation] (why my colonists have such cute lil’ faces)

Vanilla Races Expanded - Saurid (dinosaur people wooooo!)

[SBV] Recreational Drum Use (banging on drums is cathartic)

[T] More Floors 1.4 (adds more floors)

Anima Gear (I could make stuff out of anima grass if I felt like doing the research for it)

Animal Controls (to stop animals eating my fancy colonist-food)

Avoid Friendly Fire (you think they would know not to walk in front of the gun but noooo)

Geological Landforms (cool new map gens)

Biome Transitions (if your map tile is next to a different biome they can mix together)

Clocks (tick tock tick tock…)

Ebbbs (goo creatures my beloved)

Erin’s Cat Overhaul (I like cats)

Erin’s Cottage Collection (everything looks so cozy ❤️)

Erin’s Decorations (for aesthetic purposes)

Erin’s Hairstyles - Redux (there’s never enough hairstyle variety)

Euglena Framework (the framework for the euglena xenotype stuff I think)

Euglena Expanded - Euglena Xenotype (tree people go brrrr)

Euglena Expanded - Implantor (expands on the euglena stuff I guess)

Floordrawings (adds more floordrawings for kids to draw)

Giddy-Up 2 (getting to the crashed ship will be easier with animals to ride)

GloomyFurniture (cute cozy furniture)

Gloomy Furniture Fix (some patches for the cute cozy furniture)

Gradient Hair (so your colonists can have frosted tips I guess)

Hard Times: Hair and Beards (I love hair and beard variety)

Haul to Stack (so they don’t clutter the freezer with individual piles of food instead of one big pile)

Horse Breeds - Skin Variations (horses very fun!!)

Hospitality (easy to lure unsuspecting victims from other factions if you run a hotel)

HousekeeperAssistanceCat (one of the first mods I ever played with and I love it)

Human Butchery 2.0 (look it’s a cannibal cult what else was I supposed to do??)

Illithid Xenotype (I like hoarding xenotyes)

Kinky Bodystrap (It was funny at the time)

Vanilla Factions Expanded - Mechanoids (scary robots)

Vanilla Weapons Expanded (can never have too many weapons)

Vanilla Factions Expanded - Medieval (cool medieval weapons)

Vanilla Cooking Expanded (expands the cooking)

Vanilla Brewing Expanded (alcohol woo)

Vanilla Brewing Expanded - Coffee and Teas (coffee and tea woo)

Megafauna (biiiiiig pets!!)

Vanilla Genetics Expanded (adds fun and illegal-feeling genetic experimentation)

Vanilla Genetics Expanded - More Lab Stuff (adds “more lab stuff” to the aforementioned mod)

Vanilla Furniture Expanded - Power (adds new power sources)

Vanilla Furniture Expanded - Security (more defense stuff)

[FSF] Complex Jobs (Legacy Version) (splits jobs into smaller subsections)

Let’s Have a Cat! (I like cats)

LightsOut (pawns turn lights off when not using them)

Metaflora (cool mechanical plants)

MinifyEverything (sometimes picking up whole sections of brick wall is okay)

More Descriptive Words and Names (adds… more descriptive words and names)

More Faction Interaction (Continued)  (the more we interact the more chances there are for me to EAT THEM)

More Horn Colors (So that impids can have ✨fancy✨ horns)

Vanilla Ideology Expanded - Memes and Structures (lots of cool ideology stuff)

More Ideological Words (just makes random generation a bit easier and more interesting)

More Persona Traits (adds more variety of traits for persona weapons to have)

More Religious Origins (more ideology stuff)

More Thrumbos (Continued) (adds a whole bunch of awesome new thrumbo types)

More Thrumbos (Retextured) (retextures the awesome new thrumbo types)

NamesGalore (adds new names for people and stuff)

NamesGaloreLatin (adds new names for people and stuff but in Latin this time) 

negative traits (more traits but bad)

Optimization: Meats - C# Edition (all meat is just “raw meat” unless it’s specifically “human meat” or “insect meat”, so it can all be stacked together easily)

Pawn Name Variety (I like them to have lots of different name options)

Pick Up and Haul (pawns can carry more than one thing at a time)

Polyamory Beds (Vanilla Edition) (🎶there were four in the bed and the little one said “roll over! roll over!” so they all rolled over and one fell out…🎶)

Prisoners Dont Have Keys (they gotta bash their way out if they want to escape)

Rainbow’s Hair Pack (I like lots of options)

Replace Stuff (so I can build stone walls on top of wood walls without un-freezing the freezer, etc.)

Rim of Madness - Bones (skulls for the skull throne and all that jazz)

Rimsenal - Hair pack (more hairstyles lmao)

RimTraits - General Traits (more traits pleeease!)

River’s Tribal Shoes (don’t want to get prickles in your feet)

Roo’s Accessory Hairstyles (hairstyles with neat accessories in ‘em)

Roo’s Dreadlock Hairstyles (dreadlocks are cool!!!)

Roo’s Glasses Hairstyles (hairstyles with cute glasses attached)

Roo’s Royalty Hairstyles (fancy hair)

RPG Style Inventory Revamped (better inventory layout)

RPG Traits+ (more traits haha)

RT Fuse (I don’t like the zzzzt events)

Sand Castles (Laursen loves building sand castles)

Simple sidearms (every colonist needs MANY WEAPONS)

Simple Utilities: Ceiling (lights on the roof!)

Vanilla Furniture Expanded - Architect Module (adds new building stuff)

Simple Utilities: Wall (lights on the wall!)

Snap Out! (slap pawns out of their mental breaks)

Standalone Hot Spring (geothermal power boring and ugly, hot spring FAR better use of steam geysers)

Strong Bridge (makes bridges stronk)

Stylized Slave Collars and Headgears (it was funny at the time)

Tilled Soil (it’s not cheating it’s just farming)

Toddlers (makes babies more interesting)

Trait and Backstory Icons (gives traits and backstories cute lil’ icons next to ‘em)

Tribal Ideology Icons (more ideology symbols but tribal-specific)

Vanilla Animals Expanded (I insist on having a huge selection of pets)

Vanilla Animals Expanded - Endangered (endangered pets)

Vanilla Animals Expanded - Royal Animals (fancy pets)

Vanilla Animals Expanded - Waste Animals (pets that will probably irradiate you)

Vanilla Apparel Expanded (more clothes) 

Vanilla Apparel Expanded - Accessories (adds fun utility items)

Vanilla Armour Expanded (more armour)

Vanilla Backstories Expanded (adds new and fun backstories for colonists)

Vanilla Base Generation Expanded (makes enemy bases on caravan trips more fun)

Vanilla Cooking Expanded - Stews (adds stew)

Vanilla Cooking Expanded - Sushi (adds sushi)

Vanilla Events Expanded (more events)

Vanilla Weapons Expanded - Quickdraw (adds quickdraw weapons)

Vanilla Weapons Expanded - Laser (adds laser weapons)

Vanilla Weapons Expanded - Heavy (adds heavy weapons)

Vanilla Weapons Expanded - Coilguns (adds coilguns)

Vanilla Factions Expanded - Settlers (cowboys and stuff)

Vanilla Weapons Expanded - Frontier (weapons for cowboys and stuff)

Vanilla Expanded - Ideology Patches (for patching things up to Ideology)

Vanilla Expanded - Royalty Patches (for patching things up to Royalty)

Vanilla Factions Expanded - Ancients (expands the Ancients)

Vanilla Factions Expanded - Empire (adds more Empire stuff)

Vanilla Factions Expanded - Insectoids (bugs. ew.)

Vanilla Factions Expanded - Pirates (love me some pirates)

Vanilla Factions Expanded - Vikings (adds vikings)

Vanilla Fishing Expanded - Fishing Treasures AddOn (you can catch treasure when fishing)

Vanilla Fishing Expanded - Xtra Fish (adds more fish for fishing)

Vanilla Furniture Expanded (More furniture)

Vanilla Furniture Expanded - Art (I’m something of an artist myself)

Vanilla Furniture Expanded - Farming (for farm furniture I guess)

Vanilla Furniture Expanded - Medical (to make cool hospitals)

Vanilla Furniture Expanded - Production (makes for very nice workshops)

Vanilla Furniture Expanded - Props and Decorations (more props and decor)

Vanilla Furniture Expanded - Spacer Furniture (cool spaceship style furniture)

Vanilla Hair Expanded (more hair)

Vanilla Hair Retextured (just helps vanilla hair be a bit nicer)

Vanilla Ideology Expanded - Anima Theme (alters the Gauranlen trees a bit)

Vanilla Ideology Expanded - Dryads (more gauranlen tree stuff)

Vanilla Ideology Expanded - Hats and Rags (adds new ideology clothes)

Vanilla Ideology Expanded - Icons and Symbols (easier to customise your ideology)

Vanilla Ideology Expanded - Relics and Artefacts (adds new relics and artifacts for your ideology)

Vanilla Ideology Expanded - Splits and Schisms (sometimes your ideology can have a reformation and split into “catholic” and “protestant” versions, I guess)

Vanilla Nutrient Paste Expanded (mmmmm yummy goo)

Vanilla Outposts Expanded (I could go make outpost camps if I wanted)

ResearchPal - Forked (I’ve always played with this mod and it’s hard to adjust without it)

Vanilla Persona Weapons Expanded (more skins for persona weapons)

Vanilla Plants Expanded - Mushrooms (adds new mushrooms)

Vanilla Psycasts Expanded - Puppeteer (adds a new psycast route to take)

Vanilla Races Expanded - Custom Icons (new icons for xenotypes)

Vanilla Races Expanded - Archon (I like lots of xenotypes and xenotype playstyles)

Vanilla Races Expanded - Fungoid (I like lots of xenotypes and xenotype playstyles)

Vanilla Races Expanded - Genie (I like lots of xenotypes and xenotype playstyles)

Vanilla Races Expanded - Highmate (I like lots of xenotypes and xenotype playstyles)

Vanilla Races Expanded - Hussar (I like lots of xenotypes and xenotype playstyles)

Vanilla Races Expanded - Phytokin (I like lots of xenotypes and xenotype playstyles)

Vanilla Races Expanded - Sanguophage (I like lots of xenotypes and xenotype playstyles)

Vanilla Races Expanded - Waster (I like lots of xenotypes and xenotype playstyles)

Vanilla Skills Expanded (expands skill stuff)

Vanilla Social Interactions Expanded (new social interactions for fun and interesting storytelling)

Vanilla Textures Expanded (makes stuff sharper and crisper)

Vanilla Textures Expanded - Variations (stuff looks cooler when it varies)

Vanilla Trading Expanded (I think this adds a stock market or something idk)

Vehicle Framework (cars go brrrrr)

Vanilla Vehicles Expanded (expands on the vehicles)

Vanilla Weapons Expanded - Grenades (adds more grenades)

Vanilla Weapons Expanded - Makeshift (adds makeshift weapons)

Vanilla Weapons Expanded - Non-Lethal (adds non-lethal weapons)

Vanilla Weapons Expanded - Tribal (adds more tribal weapons)

VPG Garden Resources (it’s a lovely day on the Rimworld and you are growing uranium in your garden)

Offworlders - The Biliog (hideous swamp people with chemfuel blood)

Vanilla Vehicles Expanded - Tier 3 (more vehicle stuff)

War Crimes Expanded 2 Core (I mean I am playing an eldritch cannibal cult it was bound to happen eventually)

Way Better Romance (streamlines the romance a bit more)

Alpha Props - Parks and Gardens (adds more awesome decorations so my colony will look snazzy)

Colors (adds more colours to the default palette)

Det's Xenotypes - Boglegs (space mafia that looked fun to draw)

Det's Xenotypes - Avaloi (more cool xenotypes that looked fun to draw)

Erin's Hairstyles 2 (I have a hoarding problem)

Erin's Baldur's Gate 3 Hairs (a really severe hoarding problem)

The Vanity Project - Bears (there's just so many cool hair mods)

The Vanity Project - Female Hair (look at them all!)

The Vanity Project - Male Hair (I'll never run out of hair to draw)

The Vanity Project - Maid Outfits (c'mon Magic Man would slay in a maid outfit)

Vanilla Ideology Expanded - Sophian Style (never have too many styles)

Dresses in the Rim (fun clothes to draw)

Extra Alerts (adds some helpful things to be aware of)

Vanilla Races Expanded - Lycanthrope (everybody's teenage werewolf dreams 'boutta come trueeee)

Upscaled - Won hair men (and we're back to the hoarding problem)

Upscaled - Won hair women (maybe it's not a problem maybe it's a ✨collection✨)

Won Hair Men Retextured (these just make the last two look a lil' bit sharper)

Won Hair Women Retextured (these just make the last two look a lil' bit sharper)

Human Leather Floor (eldritch cannibal cult, need I say more?)

Facial Animations Xenotype Compatibility (for compatibility)

[CAT] Show Hair With Hats or Hide All Hats (so we can have cool hair and cool hats)

Sin's Cuter Child Clothes (cuter child clothes)

While You’re Up / PUAH+ (pawns will carry stuff while they’re on their way to and fro)

[fur-focused]

Finally finished this project I've been working on for over a month. Brain is now soup. I have never tried to render anything more realistic like this, and my style is very cartoony so it was quite a process. I've included all the WIP exports I made during the process to document the changes made from the start to the end, with the final piece at the top. Happy Holidays everyone!

[mayo-in-the-morning]

Hey hey hey mayo mavens, it's the moment you've all been dreaming of, it's time for episode three of our little podcast! We are so happy to be back chatting to y'all, and as an aside, apparently only 10% of podcasts made get to a third episode before they run out of steam, so this is a little milestone for us! Thank you all for being here with us and showing us your enthusiasm and sending us asks for our guests and letting us know you're listening, it means the world to us, truly.

If you're new here, welcome, there are two whole other episodes that you can listen to if you like this one! Or listen to them first if you are a sequencialist. OR. chaotic option, play all three at the same time and just listen to the bits that you can hear in the gaps of the others...

We are joined this time by the glorious @metalheadmickey to discuss spicy fictions and the business of writing smut and it was such a treat, Jessie thank you so much for joining us!

Next time we are talking to everyone's adopted mom @squidyyy23 about crossovers, incredible outlines, and where my adoption papers are because it's been, like, months...so be sure to join us for that!

Until next time <3

Notes and warnings for episode 3 under the cut.

Episode Warnings

Explicit discussions of sexual content

Hosts

Leigh / she/her / @thisdivorce / vitalspark

Howl / she/her / @howlinchickhowl / howlinchickhowl

Jessie / they/them / @metalheadmickey / catgrassplantdad

Mayo In The Morning / asks

Current Fandom Events

Gallavich Trope Event / @its-a-queer-thing

Spicy Gallavich Collab / @spicygallavichcollab

Fandom History

Supernatural - obviously. Maybe one day we will get through an episode without discussing supernatural, but given our guest this time, it was never going tot be this one.

E.L. James - don't be E.L. James, guys. And by that we don't mean 'don't try and get your smut fic published and become a multi-millionaire author' because we would love that for you, we truly would. We mainly mean don't do that with a fic that heavily features kinks that you don't fully understand the consequences of practicing and export your poor understanding to millions of people around the world who decide to try it out without doing any research and put themselves in danger and put members of the community who do practice safely under intense scrutiny from the morality police. Don't do that.

The origins of Horny Gay Thug

Fanfictions mentioned

Watching / Cinematic with art by @heymrspatel / Ligature - all by Jessie

The Echo I Created by keepgoing/@23milestogo - Leigh's recommendation that doesn't quite fit into the smut category, but is worth a read nonetheless!

Our Favourite Smut Fics

Jessie

The Menagerie (WIP) by @crossmydna / You Like Me by anythingbutgrief / Spice Up Your Life by @squidyyy23/ Kinktober 2022 by @whatthebodygraspsnot

Howl

@ hornygaythug by @whatthebodygraspsnot / (g)loved up by @gallawitchxx / Let The Bodies Do The Talkin' (WIP) by @captainjowl / Size Matters by bravado

Leigh

Penile Enhancement by @captainjowl / The Switch-up by whatthebodygraspsnot / Africa (WIP) by @ian-galagher

[sirenspells]

WIPs and abandoned projects (March 2021-December 2023)

Info on each one (as well as what the songs/audio sources are):

The song playing in the intro and outro is Dianthus Nardiformis from the Dreaming Mary OST.

19: March 2021. Okay so this one's not actually a work in progress. I made this on my 19th birthday, the joke being that the singer just says 19 then it ends. I think I thought it was kinda dumb so I didn't end up actually posting it. Also features a sona I had before Cress that I never really got attached to, so she was barely used. Song is 19 by Old 97's.

Lonely Holiday: July 2021. This has the honor of being the first OMORI mv I ever attempted. I started this on a whim while bored out of my mind dogsitting for a couple weeks, and I kinda just lost interest in it. Dunno if I'll go back to it. Song is Lonely Holiday by Old 97's.

Numb: July 2021. Another one I started while dogsitting, and another one I kinda just lost interest in, but I absolutely want to revisit it someday because it's an idea I've had for a while and still really want to do. Song is Numb (Linkin Park Cover) by Robyn Adele Anderson.

The Artist: December 2021. I stopped working on this one because doing everything manually frame-by-frame got really annoying and I started to hate working on it. I dunno why I did the zoom in manually but it looks bad, lol. The entire MV would have been just this verse of the song because I thought it really fit Basil and Omori. Tbh I still like how this looks and I may come back to it. Song is The Artist by The Hush Sound.

Higher: February 2022. It's the animation meme. I actually posted this wip a while ago but I'm still gonna include it here for completion's sake. This was really just storyboard practice, so I don't have much of an interest in completing it beyond this. It's Omori Strikers AU (my omori x persona 5 crossover au) and it's basically about Omori's identity issues due to being Sunny's Shadow. The quality's really bad on this one, for some reason iMovie refused to export it in a higher quality than this, I don't know why. Song is High by SIVIK.

Little Sunbeam: February 2022. This MV would have centered on the omari au, and beyond this it'd switch to Mari's pov and take on different palettes. Doing that text effect made working on this very annoying and would make my art program lag a lot so I lost interest in working on it. I might revisit this one, though I'd have to rework the original idea I had now that my perception on the common omari au has changed lol. Song is Little Sunbeam by Eleisha Eagle.

Nightmarish: April 2022. This MV would technically be a remake of one I made in 2020. Same song, same color palette, but with a completely new media. Part of wanting to work on this is wanting to spread Dreaming Mary propaganda cause I love it and I think people who like OMORI will like Dreaming Mary as well. Also I love this song. I definitely wanna go back to this one at some point. Song is Nightmarish from the Dreaming Mary OST.

Keep You Safe: July 2022. Like Higher I also posted this wip before but will still include it here. I absolutely want to go back to this one someday because I still really like the idea I have for it. Fun fact, for those who remember this piece, that was based on this MV, but it's not like you can tell based on what's shown here. Song is Keep You Safe by The Crane Wives.

Four Walls: August 2022. Amnesiac Omori MV, what would have been his youtube introduction if I hadn't stopped working on it and then made When Am I Gonna Lose You. I think I kinda just lost interest in this one, though I wanna go back to it at some point I think. Song is Four Walls (The Ballad of Perry Smith) by Bastille.

Someone Gets Hurt: January 2023. Amnesiac omori again babey!! Animatic that would have taken place after he regains his memories, where he's basically really angry and lashes out at Sunny and Stranger. Might revisit this one. Song is Someone Gets Hurt (Reprise) from the Mean Girls musical.

Uhh some shitpost: February 2023. Silly thing, it's a shame I stopped working on it before it actually got to the main funny part. I dunno if I'll go back to this one. Audio from @/tylergaca on twitter.

Jealous: March 2023. Animation meme. It would've been about Sunny and Mari in my pmd au and the leadup to the incident. It took me a while to get that second shot right and I still really don't like it. Do wanna revisit this one cause I love angst surrounding these two so much I love them in pmd au GRAHHH. Song is Jealous by Eyedress (slowed down).

Stranger lipsync test: May 2023. This was way too difficult as a lipsync test so I gave up on it, though I still like the animation for it. Also this is a pretty good contender for headcanon voice for Stranger I'll be real. Audio is from Persona 5 Royal.

Propaganda: August 2023. Amnesiac omori au storyboard that I do actually wanna make into a completed thing. This is very spoilery so my master plan is to not explain what's happening. Muah hah hah >:3c. Also once again iMovie exported this in a really bad quality for some reason. Song is Propaganda by Kill J.

Alter's Rant: December 2023. One more amnesiac omori animatic for the road. Once again it's really spoilery but it's basically Alter and Omori's final confrontation. I have more done than what's shown here but I wanna keep it a surprise for when I finish it, which should hopefully be soon >:3c. Also this one also got hit by iMovie's low quality curse. Song is Eva's Rant from Bring It On The Musical.

[ilovedthestars]

Trick or treat? 🪣

i hope you like More Angst!! this is the start of a wip called Lies which fell victim to the problem that a lot of my fics do--it had a solid beginning, then started to get more fuzzy at the end, and I never figured out how i wanted to end it. nonetheless i think the premise was pretty fun to play around with! i'm pretty sure it was inspired by an exported despair pit idea, SO.

a heads up/cw for...not sure how one would phrase it, but the POV character (murderbot) being uncertain of what's real and what's not.

---

This time when I restarted, I wasn’t on Preservation Station, or in a cubicle, or back on my last company survey. I was lying on the platform of ART’s MedSystem. Fuck. This meant they’d found some of my hidden logs and cracked the encryption. If they knew about ART then I didn’t know what else they knew. “Oh, SecUnit, you’re awake. We’re so glad to have you back.” It sounded so much like Mensah this time. They’d finally gotten the gentle tone of her voice just right. This was the most convincing lie yet. I still wasn’t going to fall for it. NotMensah was sitting next to me, in a chair beside the platform. Standing a little behind her was Three. No, wait, NotThree. This meant they knew about Three, too. That was bad. They might get in touch with Barish-Estranza and tell them their destroyed SecUnit wasn’t really destroyed. They might be able to track it down. Maybe they already had. Maybe it was in here with me, being fed its own stream of lies. “Do you know where you are?” NotMensah said gently. “Do you remember what happened?” I knew exactly where I was. I couldn’t feel the hard lab table underneath me but I knew it was there. Human brains were great at simulating imaginary scenarios. So was mine, if it was fed the right instructions. It almost felt like I was really in ART’s MedSystem. Just like it had felt like I was in all the other places they had shown me. I got a ping that felt exactly like ART. They’d figured out a way to fake its feed address. I blocked the connection and shut down my feed. I wasn’t stupid enough to fall for that. “You were captured by the company,” NotMensah said. She paused, waiting for my reaction. I didn’t give them one. It wasn’t like that was a surprise. They knew I was aware of what they were doing to me. They’d wiped sections of my short-term memory but it wasn’t hard to piece together that I was company property again. NotThree sent me a memory file of my body clamped to a lab table, staring blankly at the ceiling. They wouldn’t even have had to fake that. This scenario was more realistic than the others, but I knew I was still in the lab with bright lights and wires and humans that rummaged around in my brain. Then it sent another file, time-stamped later, of it carrying me on board the ship, depositing me in ART’s MedSystem, leaking fluids across the floor as it did so. We rescued you, NotThree said. Why were they doing this? Why couldn’t they just hurt me?

[dazeddreamerr]

One of my WIP was somehow deleted from EVERYWHERE. When I say everywhere I mean it. When I wrote I usually wrote in Pages. Then I upload it to my google drive and I export it as a pdf.

This particular WIP was a favorite of mine. Something I’d pick up whenever I felt like I needed a pick me up. It was a sci-fi fantasy fic and it had two of my top five favorite characters that I’ve come up with. I may try to rewrite it at some point. I still have my Brian dumps and notes from when I was writing it. I just don’t have the actual file.

Think folklore and mythology. This fun and playful while being a little dark and deep. This young adult story begins in senior year of boarding school. A sweet shy girl from some a small town gets noticed by the most popular bad boy at school. Except she’s a Witch and he was a warlock. Bad boy is into some shady stuff that could put everyone in danger. A female tree nymph may be exactly what the young which needed in more than one way .

I was far enough into the project that the characters had names and descriptions. They had personality traits and swagger. And I know I’ll never be able to recreate no matter how hard I try.

Since then I’ve started my current WIP. I started this tumblr. I’ve started to write 4-6 times a week. I’ve spent time on procreate trying to visualize and get a rough sketch down on paper. As a character develops I’ll take breaks and pick up the pencil. Try to find the character on the blank page. Drawling my characters is definitely the hardest part of my creative process but vital. It’s also therapeutic unveiling and revealing another piece to the character puzzle.

Now the kicker of it all is that the WIP that was lost (in ALL of the different places it was saved) was more than likely intentionally deleted. Who you might ask would’ve done something so savage? Me. Plain and simple. Me. Not only am I the only one with access to my MacBook, but my drive and the pdf also disappeared. That can only mean one thing…. I must’ve been hypomanic at the time and deleted it in a fit of rage. For those of you who do not know, hypomania is a form of emotional dysregulation. Personally for me when I hit a high enough threshold my brain stops recording memories. So yes. It probably was me who deleted it from everywhere. And I will never remember. I won’t remember what got me to the point of that much distress (it doesn’t take much lol) but it happened and there’s nothing I can do about it. Believe me I tried everything I could think up.

So I’m just chalking this one. I’m going to keep working on my current WIP. And in the future try to remember how I feel while I was looking for my lost work.

[terendelev]

WIP WEDNESDAY (even though it is not wednesday here I will still join hehe)

tagged by dear @dirty-bosmer thank you sooo much!

tagging @dekarios @envergothash @gortash @maxthetruman @skiitter @halsin and anyone who wants to join!

so I had a wip in my hands already it is fron my long-term enver/tamsin fic hehe

Tamsin took a sip from her goblet and raised a brow. It was her favorite; cherry wine made in Neverwinter and exported to the Sword Coast. He knew how she liked this brand and type but it wasn’t something Gortash would usually drink considering his taste in wine. Probably he kept the ones in his hands even after she disappeared.  “Are you trying to convince me into this alliance with good quality wine?”  “I don’t think you need to be convinced.” He smiled and drank from his cup. “I saw your face when I made my offer.” “It doesn’t mean that I am ready to leap into an alliance with you considering how you are willing to throw your partners into the fire.” Tamsin sliced her chicken and took a small bite despite the urge to take the meat and swallow it whole. “It is a lie that Orin wants the Netherstones for herself isn’t it?” “It is not.” Gortash was watching her with a neutral expression on his face. Tamsin realized he hadn’t touched his food yet. “Orin wants to kill me… and when she does that she will take my stone as well. Ours was never a permanent alliance. She is not someone you can turn your back.” “She is quite… unhinged that is true.” The woman left an unpleasant impression on her when Tamsin saw them in the Illithid Colony. However, they seemed getting along well enough back then.  “Unhinged would be an underestimation. She can’t control herself and I have no use of an ally like that. However you…” A wicked smile was placed on his lips. “We can work together.” “I didn’t know I had such a high value in your eyes.” Tamsin shoved another piece in her mouth out of frustration. “You sound like a desperate person who is trying to play his remaining cards correctly.” And I don’t believe none of the words you said about this alliance. “Desperation? Not really but I won’t deny that I need your help about killing Orin.” He absentmindedly took another sip from his wine, completely ignoring his plate. “And about trust issues… do you think I don’t know how you tried to take a peek into my mind Tamsin?”

[sleepyowlwrites]

not me being fascinated with my own writing

hey, wanna read some stuff from 2017? this is Mercenary Story in its first outing, when it was called Twisted. for reasons. (i don't think there were any reasons.)

I've recycled some of the names from this old wip so I've swapped them all out with their new versions

The front door opened and Shar stumbled inside, scowling as fierce as a baby bear trying to prove he was top cub to a gang much bigger bears. "I'm fine," he said as soon as Jorand saw him.

hehe

The edges of Rasterpool were far more silent than the center. Everything seemed more dead, and certainly more dusty. All the buildings were covered in sandy, rust-colored dirt, the only movement coming from when the wind descended and blew the dust into new patterns on the old streets. This was bug territory. Everything was broken. Everything was dead. Except maybe a couple of mercenaries on assignment.

I loved describing cities six years ago and I still do now

Naki was always strangely grateful that his job, while hard and usually dangerous, paid well enough to him clothed and sated. He remembered his childhood, unlike Shar, who'd come to them with no background or family. In Naymoor, everyone lived in big family groups, but there were always poor around. Buzzards, they were called there, the ones who lived off of what was left behind. It was the same anywhere, and especially in this broken city. Everybody climbed over everybody else to survive. Dishonesty was the best policy and they all expected murder from each other.

Innocence was a foreign concept, yet Shar had come to them with his almost fully intact. It was a shame they'd had to drive it out of him, though it wasn't totally gone yet. It was probably why he was always getting into trouble. Naki almost envied him.

ah yes, the envy of innocence, that old chestnut

When they heard a dull bang half a kilometer from the house, Naki dropped the trigger in a trash heap and sighed in satisfaction. Eshku eyed him with something akin to distaste. "Must you take so much joy in destruction?"

"I must," Naki grinned back at him. "It's the little things in life, Eshku. Gotta take joy where we can."

"Yeah." Eshku sighed too, a more weary sound. "We take it where we can."

I dunno what my original plan for this flavor of fantasy was, but it certainly sounds a lot more fullmetal alchemist than what I remember

Of all the members of their little gang, Tav was the most confusing to Shar. He knew he was psychic, but it had never been fully explained what that meant. It always seemed like he could read Shar's mind, but not the others. Maybe his brain was more open, since he had a lot less memories to go by.

But it wasn't just the psychic thing. Tav knew a lot of things. He knew about constellations. He could identify any flower or tree and found insects fascinating. He knew about imports and exports and when all the harvests happened. He knew when it was going to rain and when someone was lying. He spoke the common language, like they all did, and was familiar with all three lower cast dialects of Rasterpool, but Shar had heard him speaking Tarisian and Namoor on more than one occasion. According to Embur, he picked up both of them simply by hearing both spoken in the markets, but that made no sense to Shar. How could he learn a language if he'd had nothing to compare it to?

Tav was a mystery, and though they weren't surprised by his odd behaviors, it seemed like the rest thought of him in this way as well.

Tav was a delight in the old version too

shamelessly tagging people I want to read this @akindofmagictoo @kaiusvnoir @ettawritesnstudies @drippingmoon @avrablake @blind-the-winds

[soumic]

4, 9, 21, 24!

So many of them wow thank you!

4. Fav character/subject that's a bitch to draw Ohhh my god idk if this counts but I love HANDS I think they're so sexy and I've dedicated SO much study to them, probably more than anything else. I'm always trying to hone in on a stylization and rhythm that feels good for them but I just asdkfjs aim high I guess so it never feels quiet where I want it to be. I know hands are infamously hard to get right so I try to cut myself some slack... one day I'll get there...!!

9. What are your file name conventions So, I'm pretty anal about my file organization, I go by folder moreso than file name, but usually I try to name an image with at least the name of the character and one other descriptor. But where I'm EVIL is that in my usual process every few days I make a new file called "doodles mm-dd-yyyy" and stick it in a big "doodles" folder. And I do all my warmups and ideating in there, and half the time I just finish a piece in it's entirety inside that doodle document??? Which is bad for resolution/aspect ration purposes, but what's the WORSE is that half the time I don't even crop and export the image?? Especially if it's just a sketch or a WIP. I just. take a screen grab of it so I can send it to my main discord server??? Like so many drawings of mine are only found in these tiny crunchy images hosted on discord which is soooooo diabolical I have to get better about it asdlkfjs

21. Art styles nothing like your own but you like anyways Ahh I always admire people who can do really tight/polished cell shaded styles with very clean lines, but I don't think it's something I'd love doing for myself. The type that you typically see in comics or like, fanmerch. I have a tendency to get veryyyy lost in the details and will spend way too long on lineart, and half the time I just turn my sketch into my lines anyway because I tend to overwork it lsdkfjs

24. Do your references include stock images Mmm it depends on what I'm looking for! I actually take a lot of my own ref images for poses cause often what I need is pretty specific sdlkfsj there's so many awkward and unflattering images of me in my camera roll because of it :P For bigger pieces for clients, espc when I'm doing design work, I often make reference boards with pureref and if I'm grabbing stock images that's where they'll go. Usually they're of specific lighting scenarios or refs for costumes or props! I like to have lots of refs together in those cases so that I'm getting more of an amalgamation instead of pulling from one specifically.

[angelosearch]

Okay so no one asked about my Of Mind and Magic WIP but I really want to talk about it anyway. And when I say WIP, I mean a page of notes. But in my head, there's a lot.

Of Mind and Magic is my... comfort fic? It is the core plot of all my daydream scenarios for the last year. It is where I export my brain when I need to not ruminate on something irl. It is the longfic I will likely never write because it is basically an FF8 post-game soap opera that is loaded with every headcanon I've ever had. However, every once in a while, I will come up with something in this sandbox that I will use elsewhere.

The fic is honestly deeply personal and there are some concepts I'd want to introduce but may feel too distant from the "reality" of the game for me to confidently write about.

BUT just because I am unsure I will ever write it, doesn't mean I don't want to talk about it! And perhaps if I do talk about it enough I will give in and try...

This fic is the ULTIMATE marrying of my two "unskippable cutscene" topics: FFVIII and mental health/psychology/neuroscience.

The main concept is that using magic in the world of FFVIII takes a toll on your mental health. We already know that summoning GFs affects memory storage and retrieval, and this is pushing that idea further. The more magic you use, and the more powerful magic you summon, the more potential there is for diseases of the mind and the development of toxic thought patterns.

But it also works the other way. Those with mental illness and those with still-developing brains (children and teenagers) are predisposed to being able to capably wield magic. This blurred "membrane" between the conscious mind and magical power can also manifest in other magic-related abilities, like manipulating dreamscapes and premonitions/visions of the future.

Particularly, those with developing brains are more capable of using magic because their pre-frontal cortex (the decision-making center of the brain) is not fully formed until age 24-27. On some unconscious level, people must decide to accept magic as something they can tap into, and if your brain is fully developed and functioning it recognizes the magic and rejects it as an "immune" response. This is why women must receive Sorceress powers for the first time as children or young adults. Once the magic is accepted in this vulnerable place (Sorceress magic or otherwise) the capacity to use magic (or accept more magic from a sorceress) never goes away. Adults can choose to use magic for the first time after their brain fully develops, but it is never as strong. People cannot junction GFs if they haven't done so before they are in their late 20s.

There is some optional dialogue with Edea at the orphanage on disk three (after the promise): "A knight will present you with peace of mind. He will protect your spirit."

In this fic, this idea plays out in the sense that the knight must ground the sorceress and help her limit her magic use so she does not descend into "madness" - melt her brain and lose herself to the all-consuming power of the magic. However, the bond between sorceress and knight does weaken the mind-magic membrane further, so there is a reciprocal need for the sorceress to also monitor the mental health of her knight.

If a knight was already predisposed to magic (maybe by using it heavily before their brain finished developing) and had a mental illness, they could have tremendous potential for magical ability.

Do you see where I am going here?

It is an eight-year post-game story from Squall's POV (at least in the first part). It's Squall/Rinoa but in the beginning, they have lost themselves and each other. It's really a story of self-discovery, change, caring for the inner child, legacy, and longing. Lots of family stuff because that's what I do, including a major plot line involving Raine and LAGUNA LAGUNA LAGUNA always.

This is why I hesitate to even try to write it: It is steeped in mental health/therapy stuff. I think I am capable of handling that as a writer, but the intensity to which I'd want to take it I am not sure is... appealing? Especially because I wouldn't want to give many trigger warnings to avoid spoiling. Also, I wonder if people would find it "appropriate" to bring super-heavy stuff into this world? Does anyone want to read about Rinoa suffering from an eating disorder in a very serious and as-accurate-as-I-can-make-it way? Or is that just insulting to people suffering from eating disorders? I like reading about this stuff, but I'm not everyone.

Squall comes to realize he has bipolar disorder... I am bipolar, I relate to Squall, and I know what bipolar experiences look like. I have no in-game "proof" of Squall being bipolar (though there's nothing in the game that disproves it either) but it's one of those things where you long to see yourself in the media you consume. Honestly, "Squall is bipolar with cptsd" (like me) was where this fic started. He has a very complete and public breakdown in this story. If you ever wanted to know what it's like to be admitted to an acute crisis psych unit in a hospital, this fic would show that. But maybe that is something that is better to write about in nonfiction??

A lot of this stuff is based on lived experience - either of myself or of other people via case studies/memoirs I've read. I rarely see stuff of this intensity depicted in works of fiction, let alone fanfiction. Is that because of a lack of representation, or is it because people don't want to read it? I honestly do not know.

I don't have a clear idea of where this story is going or when/where it will end, which is another factor that makes me hesitate in writing it. In my mind, I have two "season finales" but it's still ongoing (though Chaos Theory has taken over lately).

Anyway, I've been dying to throw this all down somewhere. If you've made it to the end of this post, good for you. You now know what the inside of my brain looks like.