#I wish they would just kiss but I know they won’t because this next book has to be about her not a love interest but her and grief and heal

[flowerwiththemachinegun]

Sorry I like my men toxic and nobody can convince me that Tseng would give you a fully healthy relationship. He’s just not the worst guy you could date. So here are some of Tseng’s toxic habits. I wish we could post powerpoint slides. Like I guess NSFW for my choice of words. Edit: Okay I’ve typed more. It’s NSFW, it wasn’t that when it was just scattered notes i swear. granted, this is still scattered notes

Forgiveness?

Tseng. The man you forgive a million times because someone like him is so hard to come by. Even if you’re a person who doesn’t tolerate bullshit. You know that it would be impossible to find anyone nearly as good as him despite his mistakes. Tseng knows this too, taking advantage of your level of comfort in him. The connection between the two of you so deep there wasn’t a possibility you could view life without him. Tseng creates soul bonds with his significant other, he has to have all of you fully invested in him. You would also want for absolutely nothing, he can provide everything you could ever want so you can focus on the future you want to build for yourself. Whether it’s school, art, creating your own business, etc. Tseng is there to guarantee everything goes according to plan if it’s financially or if he has to pull a few strings. Seeks out people who would be reluctant to replace him but aren’t very co-dependent. If you manage to leave Tseng, say good riddance to developing any new relationships. He’s either going to make any of your new significant others vanish. If it’s someone he can’t kill, he’ll find a way to scare them away from you or find a way to put them in prison. 

My alternative reasoning as to why all of your other relationships would fail? The dick of course. Yes. The unbelievable wee wee. There’s not a soul in the world that would be able to learn your body the way he does. Have you ever heard of people being nearly ready to pass away because they lost their dick? Well if you haven’t, you have now. Even thinking of him fucking someone else the way he does with you is enough to make you want to vomit. That shit will have you sliding down the wall crying. You can try all you like to fuck someone else, it won’t compare. The way he touches you immediately sends electricity down your spine. It’s all in the way he knows how to touch you. Where to touch you. A subtle brush of his fingers along the small of your back while you’re riding him. An almost tickling sensation that causes you to press yourself against him as he leans up to kiss the most sensitive parts of your neck. How about when all he needs to do is look into your eyes and knows exactly how you want to be fucked? You can’t think of a time you had to ask him to do anything, your minds were seemingly in perfect sync. Always so so willing to please you. “So you wanna fuck other people huh?” He whispers in your ear mockingly while driving his cock deeper into you. Your knees pressed against your chest, legs hooked in Tseng’s arms as he ensures you won’t slip out of your position. No, you really don’t, not when he’s reminding you of what you’ll be missing. You’ll be calling him the next day for more, innocently asking for him to come over to “talk”. There won’t be much talking, just Tseng bending you over the kitchen table. His hands gripping your hips tightly as he fucks himself into you so deeply, ignoring the way your hands push against his abdomen in a half-hearted attempt to slow his tempo down. 

There aren’t many people in this world that would be nearly as attentive as he is. The way he can easily tell all of your needs within moments of talking to you. Reads you like a book and it can’t help but make your heart flip, cause like, ‘who sent this man?’ and why does he know all of your emotional needs and exactly how to take care of them? Tseng carries aspects of his job along with his relationships. The same way he gets to know his enemies closely, he’ll do the same to you. Memorizes all of your sayings, even can predict what your response would be to most questions or statements. It’s almost more eerie than heart warming. With this comes the ability to manipulate you endlessly. Gaslighting has never been easier honestly. Lying to you about anything or forcing you to agree with his point of view would be child’s play. The way he carries himself during an argument, so well composed, rarely letting his emotions control him paired with the way he effectively strings his words together to soothe you. His calmness will make you question why you’re even so worked up. Tseng isn’t, so why are you? Tseng makes you see everything through rose colored lenses, and despite your aching heart when he hurts you, Tseng could never be wrong in your eyes. He only does what’s best for you. 

Gaslighting? Probably.

Truly remembers every word you’ve said to him and will use it against you. This goes back into my last little paragraph but deeper? Uses traumatic things from your past so you can believe that maybe your emotions, in regards to something Tseng has done wrong, are nothing more than misguided reactions. Will have you think that maybe you’re projecting your fears from past experiences onto him when you challenge him or try to hold him accountable for any wrongdoings. Certainly will guilt trip you knowing exactly what makes you feel like you’re the biggest piece of shit in the world. He doesn’t have to do anything outrageous. It’s the way Tseng subtly changes his body language. Slumping his shoulders just a bit, the way his brow furrows at your words or actions, breaking eye contact and staring at the floor like a scolded child. To put the cherry on top, it’s the ever so slight change in his tone of voice. The wavering in his tone as he speaks softly, not too soft for it to sound out of the ordinary, but enough for you to believe you’ve hurt his feelings. Usually resulting in you coddling him, now you’re the one apologizing because you “never meant to make him feel bad” even if it’s because you were grilling him for something as major as fucking his boss behind your back. Believing that it must be your fault if he’s off sleeping with others. Master manipulator for sure. He’s good at lying, like we see what he does for a living.

Like to make you cry because he's the only one that can also make you better. At times he’ll do this just to make sure he’s got complete control over you still. Wrapping his arms around you in such a calming way, his warmth and sweet words coaxing you to relax against him so he could “make it all better again.” More makeup sex. Somehow gets a kick out of cheering you back up. One minute you were sobbing because his words were a little too cruel and now you’re sobbing because he won’t stop fucking you so good. Tseng has a way he likes to position you in times like this. Having you lay on your stomach, your back arched just enough for his hips to flush against your ass as he completely sheaths himself in you, whispering in your ear asking “you still love me, right?” Christ, he has a way of making himself emotionally needy at just the right times. You can’t help but whimper, whine, and eventually choke out, through your moans, your appreciation, love, and devotion to him. Always ends with him cuming in you, some aftercare, then holding you in his arms for a majority of the night unless work calls him away.

Sometimes-y af?

He can pick and choose when he wants to pick up your relationship or not but you cannot do the same to him. Loves someone who he can come and go as he pleases with. You're so stupid and willing. Loyal to a fault, though the only person it’s negatively affecting is you. There isn’t a time you’ve turned him away thus far. Constantly taking him into your arms, babying him as though he’s some angel despite you knowing he isn’t. Tseng’s just managed to get you to the point you couldn't care less about his deceptive ways. You just want him by your side, no matter what the circumstances may be. The entire world can see the invisible leash and collar Tseng has put on you, yet you manage to stay blind to it all. You’ll wait like the good little puppy he’s molded you into. 

It’s a wonder he can be such a gentleman and a conniving son of a bitch. The kind to end an argument by demanding to be left alone but will ask “what you're doing tonight” a few hours later---he's going to fuck you—giving you a reason to keep accepting him back into your loving arms. He knows you’re a gift from the Goddess but he can’t help that he likes being toxic at times. It’s why he treats you so well and the sex is so unbelievably good. He needs to cement himself into your soul so he can continuously get away with everything, so things can continue to go exactly as he wants it to. Tseng prefers a life with you that has no consequences. For him. You, however, have to deal with punishment if you dare treat him in a similar manner to his treatment of you. Will show his displeasure with hurtful words and by neglecting you. If that doesn’t have the desired effects he’s willing to scare you into submission. Once again, nothing too outrageous that he would do. Tseng might just choke you a bit, push you against a wall, or if you try to run he’ll hold you against him tightly. Whispering into your ear about making you disappear if he can’t have you the way he wants you. Telling you how he does so much for you and he at the very least deserves you on your best behavior at all times or else he might just have to break that pretty neck of yours. Isn’t too big on yelling, he can get his point across just fine without having to do so.

Stalker? Obviously.

Tseng has trackers in your cars, phone, and bags. It doesn’t matter where you go, he’s going to find you. He’s definitely followed you from location to location, making sure you were doing what you said you would be. Sure he’s always been able to track you, but that isn’t the same as seeing you. You could be doing anything in the areas you claimed to be in. Tseng is even familiar with the faces of employees of each store you frequent. Has tracked down every family member and friend of yours, performing thorough background checks on all of them. Even closely looking after some of the people closest to you. Tseng has to approve of the people you hang around of course, he won’t tolerate anything that he feels is a negative influence and will force them out of your life. Tseng will sit outside of your house for hours after leaving, wondering if someone will come over. If he knows someone is coming over he’s got your home mic’d. Listening to all of your conversations, evading your most private conversations. Hates to hear when you vent about him, makes it hard to come back to you and act nice when in reality he wants to correct you for telling his business to your friends and family. Doesn’t mind when you’re speaking highly of him though, you help boost his ego most of the time. Getting space from Tseng is impossible. Your attempts to drive around and find a nice parking spot are all for nothing. He’s following right behind you. Is definitely going to block you in with his own car, angrily getting out of his own. Once he made you leave your car where it was entirely. Pissed that you would try to get away from him at all, it doesn’t matter if it’s just for a few hours. Pushing you into the passenger seat of his car, driving you back home all while yelling about how stupid you were and that you would always come back begging for him. 

He was always right about that. Nothing would stop you from wanting Tseng back if he finally decided he was done. A relationship with Tseng is either on his terms or very much a “till death do us part” 

[acourtofquestions]

Currently on Chapter 59 of Heir of Fire & I’d be lying if I said I haven’t been crying since Celaena fell asleep in Rowan’s arms up in that tree😂🤣🥹😭🖤 just tooooooo much to say — Abraxos flying with Manon — Dorian & Sorscha — the kitty-cat friend🤣 — all of Aelin facing the Valg — she has short red hair now (?) & like the least of changes as she said, but also POWER MOVE — & just UGHAJABSNWLWN *keyboard smash head desk* … 9 chapters left, then on to Queen of Shadows😬😆

[athenamikaelson]

Klaus Mikaelson x Soulmate!Reader x Elijah Mikaelson Pt. 

Word Count- 5.5k

Warnings- Swearing, violence, spoilers for canon, abusive dads, trauma, reader having bad responses to her trauma.

“Wait, you’re telling me that I miss ghosts coming back and terrorizing Damon just because I went to a doctor’s appointment?”

I deadpan at Ric as he looked over a bunch of pictures and drawings they had found in some mystery tunnel. 

“That’s what you get for going to the doctor,” Damon smirks at me as he and Elena spar. 

“Oh, I’m sorry, Demon. Next time I just won’t get shot,” I shoot a glare at him and he rolls his eyes. Elena uses this moment to try to throw a punch at the vampire but Damon easily catches it. 

Elena sighs defeated and then turns to me, “How did your appointment go? Any good news?”

I roll my left shoulder and then shrug, “Nothing really new. The doctor did say I’m healing faster than anyone he’s seen before though,” This gains all three of their attention, “He chalked it up to my wonderful youth.”

“Well that’s good,” Elena smiles happily.

“And he said he liked my birthmark.”

“You have a birthmark?”

I look over to Ric who is looking at me questionably.

“Ya, she’s got like a smudge on her shoulder,” Damon jests and I glare at him.

“It’s not a smudge you asshat.”

“Don’t be mean Damon,” Elena defends me, “Personally I love Y/N’s birthmark. I think it’s cute. Almost looks kinda like the moon.”

I walk over to Elena and we both glare at the blue-eyed vamp who just rolls his eyes again. 

“Thank you, my love,” I look over to my best friend who is sporting a light pink tint to her cheeks at the nickname.

“Of course, my beautiful best friend,” Elena smiles back and we both giggle.

“Can y'all just kiss and get it over with,” Damon groans out.

“You wish you had a boyfriend the way I have my girlfriend, Damon. Your jealousy is oozing off of you,” I smile at the man and he purses his lips and then goes over to Ric.

A buzzing in my pocket has me separating from my friend and grabbing my phone. 

“Oh shit,” I whisper out and quickly grab my jacket off a nearby chair.

“Where are you going,” Elena asks to me as I book it to the front door.

“Theo’s tire popped and he’s supposed to be at practice in 2 minutes. So I have to go rescue him. Toddles!”

—

“Thanks for picking me up,” I groan as Theo grabs his football padding from the trunk of my car and puts them into my arms.

“Ya, whatever,” I struggle to carry it all as Theo closes the trunk and makes me follow him towards the school.

“Dude take your shit before I drop it,” I groan out to my brother who turns back and gives me a look before dramatically sighing and grabbing the gear from my hands.

“You need to start hitting weights. I’m bulking up this season so you can join me,” My brother says excitedly. 

I stare at him in disgust, “Oh ya cause that sounds like great sibling bonding time to me.”

“Do you know how many people would kill to be my sibling,” Theo asks and I shoot him a blank look.

“Many people, nerd. Many a people,” I fight the urge to laugh at my brother’s dramatics as his mood instantly brightens, “There’s the guys! I got to go, see you later nerd.” 

I stand there for a moment as I watch my brother run off to his teammates. Oddly enough though after going like 10 feet he stops and turns around. He quickly runs over to me and for a second I think he’s going to knock me down but instead, he balances his gear on one hand, and with the other he side-hugs me. 

“Even though other people want to be my sibling, I wouldn’t want any of those hoes,” Theo lets go of me and gives me a boyish grin, “You’re kind of a cool sister. Even if you are a nerd.”

Theo turns back around and I can’t fight the huge smile that comes over my face as I watch my little brother instantly start bickering with his teammates. 

“You guys have a cute relationship,” A feminine British voice makes my smile instantly drop.

“Hello Rebekah,” I turn around and come face to face with the pretty blonde Mikaelson. 

“That’s your little brother I assume. He looks just like you,” She smiles at me but I don’t return it.

“What do you want?”

Rebekah doesn’t seem to be unsettled by my prickly attitude as she continues talking. 

“I was wondering if you’d like to get lunch with me. Or perhaps go dress shopping? Homecoming is coming up and I’ve never been to one so I could use some help.”

My eyes narrow in confusion, “You’ve never been to a homecoming? Aren’t you like a million years old?”

Rebekah seems momentarily annoyed by my comment but quickly brushes it off, “I spent much of my life following my brothers around. Neither of which care for the dramatics that come with high school. So no, I haven’t been to a high school dance.”

I think about what she said for a moment and a smirk graces my lips at the thought of posh Elijah at a homecoming dance. 

“You’re not missing out on much,” I pick at the thread of my shirt, “I mean, not that I would know. I’ve never been to one either.”

At this Rebekah frowns, “You’ve never been! Why not?”

I shrug at Rebekah’s question, “Public places with tons of people aren’t really my thing. I’d rather be alone than be in a room with a bunch of drunk, loud teenagers.”

I move around the Original and start walking towards my car but inwardly groan when I hear her footsteps behind me.

“Great! Then we can experience it for the first time together!”

I bite my lip in anger and whip around, “What are you doing?”

Rebekah’s face morphs into one of confusion, “What do you mean?”

I gesture to her and then to me, “This! Why are you trying so hard to be around me? Did your brother put you up to this? He’s already making Alastair follow me around like a dog, so what about you?”

At my outburst, the girl frowns, “I heard about what my brother did. His ways of caring for people aren’t always shown in the best ways,” She smiles softly at me, “But I swear to you my brother didn’t put me up to this. I just…would like a friend…I would like you to be my friend.”

I look at Rebekah and try to find any signs of deceit in her face but I can’t seem to find any.

“You can’t just have friends, Rebekah. Friendships are built on trust. I can’t be friends with you unless you prove to me that I can trust you.”

Rebekah seems to take this as a approval as she quickly nods her head, “Great! Then I’ll just make you trust me. Can I have your phone number so I can text you? That’s what it is called right? I’m still quite new to this ages technology.”

I sigh and then reach out my hand and Rebekah smiles grabbing her phone from her pocket and placing it in my hand. I go to her contacts and type in my number and hand the phone back to the smiling blonde. 

I turn around and head to my car but hear the blonde call after me.

“I’ll text you!”

—

Rebekah wasn’t joking when she said she’d text me because approximately an hour later I’m pulling up to the Salvatore house because she practically begged me to meet her here.

“Y/N? What are you doing here?”

I turn around and spot Elena getting out of her SUV. 

“Rebekah asked me to come,” I frown at my friend’s worried expression, “What are you doing here?”

“She asked me to come as well.”

Elena and I warily eye each other for a moment before walking up to the front door. Elena goes first as she pushes the front door open and my ears are assaulted by loud pop music.

Elena shoots me a look over her shoulder and I shrug as we make our way into the foyer. We begin walking into the living room but stop when a smiling She-Klaus walks over to us with champagne in her hands.

“Hey, what’s up?”

“You invited me over to talk,” Elena says from beside me, not matching Rebekah’s cheery attitude.

“I’m not exactly sure why I’m here,” I raise a finger.

Rebekah looks at us and then turns around, “Alright, girls. Have at it.”

I’m confused on who she’s talking to for a moment but then when a group of girls wearing homecoming dresses enter the living room in a line, I have my answer.

“What the hell,” I whisper to Elena who looks as shocked and confused as me. 

“Okay, now twirl, please,” Rebekah asks the girls and I watch in disgust as they all oblige.

“You’ve compelled your own private runway show?”

I nod along to Elena’s question because I’m also thinking the same.

“I need a homecoming dress. So what do you think? Pick one” Rebekah says as if this is totally normal behavior. 

“I know you’re new to this whole thing…and century. But most people just go to the store and try on the dresses. Not compel a bunch of innocent girls to parade around in them.”

Rebekah frowns at me. 

“We’re not here to help you shop. I’m here to talk about why you don’t want me to wake up Mikael.”

Rebekah smirks at Elena’s comment for a moment before flashing behind a blonde girl. I jump back slightly as I watch her fangs protrude from her gums as she puts them near the girl's throat. 

Elena takes a step forward and I follow.

“I said pick one, Elena.”

Elena looks a me for a moment before pointing to one of the girls, “The red one.”

“There,” Rebekah smooths out the blonde girl's hair, “That wasn’t so hard, was it? Go away. Remember nothing.”

I watch disturbed as the girls walk back out of the room and Rebekah comes back over to us. 

“You do not threaten me,” Rebekah stares Elena down and I move slightly in front of my friend, “You will learn what I allow you to learn. Is that clear?”

Elena nods from beside me and Rebekah moves around us and out of the room. Elena and I shoot each other another look before following the girl upstairs and into Stefan’s room where Rebekah is starting to go through the broody vampire’s things. 

“We shouldn’t be here,” Elena says standing next to me in the doorway.

“Of course, we should,” Rebekah says as she picks up a pair of boxers, making me frown in disgust, “Come on. Like you’ve never wanted to snoop. Boxer briefs. Now that’s a change from the ‘20s.”

“Ew. TMI.”

“Are you gonna root through his stuff all night or are you gonna start to tell us your story?”

Rebekah sighs, “You really are no fun,” She turns to me, “Why are you friends with such a bore?”

“One thing you should learn about me Rebekah,” I glare at the blonde, “I am not friends with people who insult my friends.”

Rebekah stares at me for a moment before rolling her eyes and muttering something under her breath. 

“What do you want to know?”

Elena takes a step into the room, “Elijah said that your father was a landowner in Europe. How did you guys end up here?”

At the mention of the suited Original, a warm feeling brushes my cheeks.

“My parents had just started a family when a plague struck their homeland. They lost a child to it. They wanted to escape and protect their future family from the same fate.”

A wave of sadness washes over me at the mention of Rebekah losing her sibling. I couldn’t imagine what I would do if I ever lost Theo. No matter how many headaches he gives me, the boy is practically my son.

“So how did you end up here,” Elena prods, “This part of the world hadn’t been discovered yet.”

Rebekah scoffs, “Not by anyone in your history books. But my mother knew the witch Ayana who heard from the spirits of a mystical land where everyone was healthy. Blessed by the gifts of speed and strength. That led my family here where we lived amongst those people.”

“The werewolves?”

“To us, they were just our neighbors. My family lived in peace with them for over 20 years during which my family had more children including me.”

“So… technically you’re American?” 

My question has both of the girls shooting me frowns but I lightly laugh at myself for the comment. 

“You make it sound so normal,” Elena comments. 

Rebekah walks towards a window and for a second I can see a thoughtful smile on her face, “It was. Once a month our family retreated to the caves underneath our village. The wolves would howl through the night and by morning we’d return home. One full moon, Klaus and my youngest brother Henrik snuck out to watch the men turn into beasts. That was forbidden. Henrik paid the price.”

A deep breath escapes my lips as the girl continues her story.

“And that was the beginning of the end of peace with our neighbors,” Rebekah turns back to look at us, “And one of the last moments my family had together as humans.”

The buzzing of Elena’s phone distracts us.

Rebekah coughs, “You better get that. That’ll be…Damon checking up on you.”

Elena turns around and answers the call as I walk over to Stefan’s desk and start rummaging through his things. I never said I was a Saint.

“Was that Stefan?’’

Elena’s question has me turning around and frowning. 

“Damon, how could you let him out,” Elena exclaims and I frown.

“That didn’t sound good.”

—

“Did you get your fill of snooping yet,” Elena asks Rebekah who is lying down on Stefan’s bed reading one of his many diaries, “Can we get on with the story?”

I watch from my seat on the floor as Rebekah throws the book onto the bed and stands up. She walks over to the desk by Elena and picks up a framed picture of the couple. 

“Honestly, I don’t get you two as a couple,” Rebekah shakes her head at my friend. 

“Why would you? You don’t know anything about who he really is,” Elena defends and Rebekah smiles at her and puts the frame back down. 

Rebekah leans down to make eye contact with my friend and I straighten up, “I know exactly who he is. He’s a vampire. We’re a predatory species. We don’t have time to care about humans and their silly little lives.”

“I don’t believe that,” I say but they don’t hear me. Or at least don’t acknowledge me. 

“Is that why you did that runway show earlier,” Elena snarks back and I bite my lip nervously as I have the feeling that a catfight is about to begin, “Because you don’t care about the homecoming dance?”

Rebekah stands up and Elena nods at her, “You know what? I’m just gonna go,” She turns to me, “Y/N you coming?”

I groan as I can practically hear my bones creaking as I stand up.

“You haven’t even heard half the story,” Rebekah calls to Elena. 

Elena turns around to her, “And you’re not going to tell it. You’re just bored and looking for someone to push around. Find someone else to play with. Maybe you can compel yourself a friend.”

OOP.

“The necklace wasn’t Stefan’s to give,” At Rebekah’s words I instantly sit my ass back down. This time on the comfy mattress. 

“It belonged to the original witch.”

Elena turns around, “The one who put the hybrid curse on Klaus?”

“Not just the hybrid curse. She’s the one who turned us into vampires.”

My mouth drops open, “Bomb drop…”

—

“Vampirism was a form of protection?”

Elena asks as Rebekah continues telling her story as we make our way down the stairs. 

“What else would it be?”

“A curse.”

“My parents only sought a way of keeping their children alive,” Rebekah answers.

“Yeah, but why stay? If they were so afraid of the werewolves why not leave?”

“Pride,” Rebekah says as she steps off the last stair and turns back to us, “My father didn’t want to run anymore. He wanted to fight and be superior to the wolves. Where they could bite we had to bite harder. Where they had speed we had to be faster. Agility, strength, senses.’’

Rebekah continues telling us the story of how the spell of vampirism came down to her mother’s hands since the other witch wouldn’t help them.

“In her hands? How could she do anything?”

Elena asks and I feel like I already know the answer. I mean if they’re called “The Originals,” I’m assuming the “Original” witch has something to do with them.

“Because my mother was also a witch.”

“What?”

“The witch of the original family.”

“The original witch,” I finish for her and Rebekah smirks at me.

We make our way into the living room and I plant myself on my favorite couch. 

“Where do they keep their best vintage,” Rebekah asks. 

“But if your mother was a witch then..”

“Am I? No,” The vampire finishes, “A witch is nature’s servant. A vampire is an abomination of nature. You can either be one or the other never both,” Rebekah fishes out a bottle of wine and then turns to Elena, “My mother did this for us. She did not turn.”

“How did you turn?”

Rebekah pours herself a glass and then walks over to the fireplace, “She called upon the sun for life and the ancient white oak tree one of nature’s eternal objects, for immortality. That night, my father offered us wine laced with blood.”

I almost gag at that.

“And then he drove his sword through our hearts.”

My heart clenches as Rebekah’s voice slightly cracks. 

“He killed you,” Elena says.

“And he wasn’t delicate about it either,” Rebekah says with tears and her eyes and quickly breaks the cap off the wine bottle. 

“We had to drink more blood to complete the ritual. It was euphoric. The feeling of power was indescribable. But the witch Ayana was right about consequences. The spirits turned on us and nature fought back. For every strength, there would be a weakness. The sun became our enemy. It kept us indoors for weeks. Although my mother found a solution. There were other problems. Neighbors who had opened their homes for us could now keep us out. Flowers at the base of the white oak burned and prevented compulsion. And the spell decreed that the tree that gave us life could also take it away. So we burned it to the ground.”

Metal.

“But the darkest consequence is something my parents never anticipated. The hunger. Blood had made us reborn and it was blood that we craved above all else. We could not control it. And with that… the predatory species was born.”

“I need a cigarette,” I say out loud as I sigh into my hands at the migraine of an origin story.

“Why did Mikael start hunting Klaus,” Elena asks not giving anyone time to catch their breaths. 

“When Nik made his first human kill,” Nik? “It triggered his werewolf gene. With that, he came my father’s greatest shame.”

“Yeah,” Elena responds, “Elijah told us this part of the story. Your mother had had an affair with one of the werewolf villagers.”

I look down at my hands as Elena and Rebekah continue speaking about Klaus’ father and I have to fight back showing any emotion as I think back to my own father, or not father I guess. 

“She tried to make it right. She put the hybrid curse on Nik to suppress his werewolf side and then she turned her back on him. But Mikael’s greatest weakness as a human was his pride. As a vampire that was magnified. He went on a rampage and killed half the village.”

Here, I thought my father leaving his family was the worst thing one could do in that situation. 

“Then he came home and killed her.”

“Mikael killed your mother?”

“He said she broke his heart so he would hers. He tore it from her chest as Nik watched. Afterwards, my father took off in a rage and the rest of my family scattered. Nik stayed so he could help me bury her. He knew I had to say goodbye to my mother.”

I listen to the rest of Rebekah’s heartbreaking story as she recalls how she and Elijah promised Klaus that the three of them would always be together. Always and forever. 

“Always and forever. Even though he locked you in a coffin for 90 years,” Elena says and I shoot a look at her.

“Dude, really?”

“We’re vampires. Our emotions are heightened. I’m stubborn, Elijah moral, and Nik…Nik has no tolerance for those who disappoint him. Over a thousand years as a family we’ve all made that mistake at least once. I’ve made it several times.”

As Rebekah’s voice softens I have to fight the urge to reach out and comfort her. Being someone who knows what it feels like to be the one disappointing a family member, I can’t help but relate and feel sorry for the girl.

“But you still love him?”

“He’s her brother, Elena,” I turn to her, “What if it were Jeremy? I know that if it were Theo, I couldn’t hate him. Even if he made my life a living hell.”

“She’s right,” Rebekah looks over to me and I can see the appreciation in her eyes, “And I’m immortal. Should I spend an eternity alone instead?”

Rebekah swallows and I think she’s about to start crying but she quickly walks by both of us, “You’ve heard the story. It’s time to go,” She turns to Elena who is just standing there, “I said leave, Elena! I don’t know what you’re up to but I am no longer playing along.”

“I’m just looking for one good reason why we shouldn’t wake Mikael.”

At Elena’s words I frown, “Are you serious Elena? The man literally killed his own children! After, abusing them their whole lives. You may have grown up in a white-picket fence family, but I didn’t. I know men like that, and men like that should stay away.”

Elena looks at me and from the look on her face, she doesn’t seem to understand why I’m defending Rebekah.

“She will anyway,” Rebekah shakes her head, “I know you want him to help you kill my brother. I’m not stupid.”

“It’s no secret that I want Klaus dead. He has a hold over Stefan’s life and over mine,” Elena points back to me, “And he’s terrorizing Y/N.”

Rebekah glares down at her, “Do what you need. Wake Mikael at your own peril. But make no mistake. If you come after my brother I will rip you apart. And I get my temper from my father. Now leave.”

Elena looks down and then back to me, “Y/N, come on.”

I look at my friend and then at the vampire, “You go. I have to talk to Rebekah.”

This seems to shock both of them, but I just stare at them blankly. Elena takes this as goodbye as she nods her head and leaves the house. 

After Elena leaves Rebekah and I stand there in silence for a moment, and awkwardly I clear my throat.

“Um, I’m sorry.”

Rebekah looks over to me confused, “What are you sorry for? You did nothing to insult me, unlike your friend.”

I frown at Elena’s behavior and then play with the loose thread on my shirt, “For losing your brother. And your mother. You were just a teenage girl when that happened. You didn’t deserve to have that happen to you.”

Rebekah stares at me almost shocked before she shakes her head and walks over to the couch I’m sitting on. 

“You have nothing to apologize for. It was over a thousand years ago, I’m over it.”

Rebekah sits on the seat next to me and we watch the flames of the fire.

“I don’t believe that. I think a loss like that stays with you. Even after a millennia.”

Rebekah turns to look at me and then nods her head softly, “Thank you, Y/N.”

We continue sitting in silence before I see her move out of the corner of my eye.

“What did you mean,” I turn to her in confusion as she speaks, “When you told Elena you didn’t grow up like she did and you knew about men like my father?”

At Rebekah’s question, I turn away from her curious glance and look back towards the flames, “It doesn’t matter.”

“You can tell me you know? It’s not like I have any other friends to go spill your secrets to.” 

At Rebekah’s words, I bite down hard on my lip to try to stop the tears that are making their way into my eyes. The urge to finally spill on the secret that I’ve been holding in all summer, building inside of me. 

“My father…growing up wasn’t the kindest man,” I say out loud trying to be careful with my words, “He was absent a lot but… those were the good moments, oddly enough, because, whenever he did come home… he was,” I stop, trying to find the right words to describe my estranged “not” father, “he was harsh. Nothing was ever good enough for him. No one was ever good enough for him. Certainly not me. He was the stereotypical macho man who thought that women weren’t equal to men. So whenever I showed strength in something, he made sure to kick me back down. Just to remember how weak I could be.”

I don’t realize I’m crying until Rebekah places a tissue into my hands. I’m not really sure where she got it but I take it and wipe away my tears.

“You mention him in past tense…is he…” 

I shake my head, “No, he’s not dead. He and my mother separated about two years ago. I haven’t seen him since.”

Rebekah doesn’t say anything as she waits to see if I’ll continue and I sigh as I try to.

“I didn’t know why they did. My mother always just kind of let it happen you know? The abuse. I don’t even know if you would call it that. It’s not like he hit me or whatever. Others have had it worse. My mother though just always told me not to provoke him, not to make him mad. But, she really wasn’t ever the one who got the brunt of it,” I bite down on my lip harder, “And you want to know the worst thing about it? Three months ago my mother told me that the man that had made me cry into my pillow since I was 8 years old… wasn’t even my actual father.”

I hear Rebekah let in a breath as she continues watching me.

“How fucked up is that, you know,” I laugh with tears in my eyes at the irony of it all.

“Did she tell you who your real father was?”

I shake my head at her question, “Just the bare minimum. I’ve barely talked to her since that day anyway. It’s the reason I have my own room down the hall,” I point towards the direction of my room at the Salvatore’s, “Damon’s let me crash here the entire summer. He’s the only other person who knows.”

“Not even your brother?”

I quickly shake my head and wipe the rest of my tears away, “Especially not, Theo. He’s so young and with the move and everything I don’t want him to be stressed out.” 

I can see Rebekah looking at me as if she’s trying to find the right words to say, “Is that the only reason you haven’t told him?’’

My eyebrows furrow as I keep staring at the fireplace, “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“I think you’re worried that he won’t accept you. Nik had that same fear after he found out he wasn’t Mikael’s.”

“I am not Klaus,” I bite out and she just nods.

“I know. But you can’t deny the similarities,” I don’t say anything as I try not to think of her words, “I know I haven’t been here very long but… just from seeing Theo and you a few times, I don’t think you have to worry about telling him. If he truly loves you he’ll accept you no matter what.”

I finally think about Rebkeah’s words and in doing so, don’t even notice the front door being swung open. 

Rebekah sighed deeply from beside me as she stood up, “I thought I told you to leave twice.”

“How do you know Mikael killed your mother,” Elena’s question has me turning slightly to hear her better.

“Nik was there,” Rebekah says as she pours herself a drink, “He told me.”

Elena sighs and she steps closer to Rebekah, “He lied to you.”

“And how do you know that?”

Elena walks over to us and I put my face down slightly so she can’t see the dried tears on my cheeks.

“The cave where you carved your family’s names, is covered in symbols. The story of your family. How your parents arrived, how they made peace, the spell that turned them into vampires, and this,” She places a photograph on the table, “This is the symbol for hybrid. It’s the combination of the werewolf and the vampire symbol. And this is the one for your mother.”

“Her necklace.”

Elena sighs, “And this is the story of her death. The hybrid killed the original witch. Not Mikael, Klaus.”

I turn fully at them both. Surprise is most likely clear on my face.

“No,” Rebekah forcefully shakes her head, “No, he wouldn’t.”

“She put the curse on him, made it so that he would be the only one of his kind and then she rejected him. With the werewolf gene comes aggression and violence. When he turned all of that was heightened. He killed her, Rebecca, and then he made up this entire lie about your father so that he wouldn’t lose you.” 

“These mean nothing. They’re just stupid drawings done by stupid people who had no idea who my family was,” Rebekah yells as she grabs the pictures and flings them into the fireplace. 

Elena approaches her, “Then why are you so upset?”

“Elena stop, just leave her alone,” I tell my friend but she ignores me. 

“Why are you doing this to me? I’ve done nothing to you,” Rebekah yells at her.

“Klaus killed your mother. He has a hold on you, on me, on everyone. He has for a thousand years. We have to make it stop!”

“Shut up! Just shut up! Don’t talk anymore! Nothing!”

I quickly stand up as Rebekah pushes Elena into the wall forcefully. 

“Rebekah!” 

After a moment Rebekah drops her hands and stands there silently with tears in her eyes. Elena and I watch cautiously but not even a moment later a sob escapes the blonde’s mouth as she drops to her knees. Elena looks over to me and I shake my head at her. 

“Go.”

I don’t even check to see if she leaves as I kneel down to the sobbing girl. I place a comforting hand on her shoulder and I gasp as I’m being pulled into a hug. Rebekah holds onto me for dear life as she cries into my shoulder. And I let her. 

—

I sigh as I throw my keys onto my kitchen table and sit down. I put my head in my hands and try to forget the shitshow that was tonight. 

“Damn bitch!”

Theo’s screech has me whipping around in my chair in shock. My brother stands there in his satin pajamas he got for Christmas last year with a hand over his heart.

“Fucking sitting in the dark like some goddamn stalker,” Theo walks over to the light switch and I try to stop him but it’s too late.

Theo’s smirk instantly drops as he rushes over to me and places his hands on the sides of my face, “What happened? Did someone say something to you? If it was someone at school tell me and I and Jeremy will go beat their asses right now.”

My brother’s angry tone has me smiling for a moment but before I can stop it tears are streaming out of my eyes and a sob escapes my mouth.

My little brother just stands there awkwardly as he pats my shoulder.

“Do you want to talk about it? Um, should I call Elena or Mom?”

At the mention of our mother, I quickly shake my head, “No. I’m fine. Just a long day and all. I just need some sleep. Go back to bed, Theodore.”

Theo shakes his head and tries to deny my request but I shoo him away. As I watch his retreating figure I sigh and take a deep breath.

“Actually Theo…there’s something we need to talk about.”

[mysslyssblog]

dating dipper pines head cannons?

Dating older Dipper Pines headcanons (15-16)

Warnings: reader is described as feminine.

Thank you so much for the request! If you have any requests please send them!!

————————————————————————

dating Dipper Pines headcanons

-Definitely friends to lovers

-I can see enemies to lovers but I don’t think Dipper would date you unless he knew you

-Speaking of that, looks don’t really matter to him

-He cares about personality

-Dipper loves you for you

-Even though he would want to be friends before dating, I can picture him having a crush on you when you guys first meet

-He would definitely be STRESSING when you’re around

-Especially when you guys go on adventures

-HE IS A SIMP (haven’t used that word in a while but I can’t think of another word 😭)

-He really wants to impress you

-He also really wants you to see him as “manly”

-Even though he grew out of that insecurity a while ago, it still lingers in the back of his mind so make sure to reassure him that he’s manly

-When you guys first start dating I feel like it might be a bit awkward

-Not necessarily in a bad way but like a cute way

-You would definitely be his first EVERYTHING

-His first girlfriend, kiss, etc.

-Probably his first touch from a woman who’s not his mom

-You boost his ego A LOT

-Make sure to give him lots of compliments to up his confidence

-As time goes on he gets a lot more comfortable with you

-It won’t take long until you guys are basically back to normal

-You’re basically best friends who kiss

-Speaking of kissing..

-Your guy’s first kiss was A MESS

-He was so sweaty and red he could barely even stay awake

-He swears he was going to pass out

-He closed his eyes too soon so he practically missed you lips and he went in to fast so he hit your nose on accident and it HURT

-He apologized so many times

-He felt so bad

-The kiss was so bad you guys don’t even consider that a kiss

-You guys made it up with a somewhat better kiss the next day

-Once he’s comfortable his loves kissing you

-He loves kissing your lips, your head, your cheek

-It’s definitely just a quick peck, nothing crazy

-He secretly likes pda

-Nothing crazy just things like hand holding or an arm around your shoulder

-He’s a hypocrite because he hates pda when it comes to other people but when it comes to you..

-He loves letting other people know that he pulled the prettiest girl ever

-When you guys are alone he’s an absolute teddy bear

-He loves cuddling and he LOVES being the big spoon

-It makes him feel manly

-CLINGYYYY

-When he gets tired he doesn’t even notice how clingy he gets

-You’ll force him to put down his book and then tuck him in

-When you move to go to Mabel’s bed (where you normally sleep) he’ll practically drag you done to his bed and wraps his arms around you waste and burry his face in the crook of your neck

-He’s also very confident when he’s tired

-He’ll make moves on you that he wouldn’t do in a million years when he’s awake and actually in control of what he’s doing

-Dipper is very gentle with you

-His touches are so light, worried that he’ll make you uncomfortable

-Consent KING

-He will NEVER do anything that you’re not 100% okay with

-He’s always been very gentle with you even before you guys dated

-This is why you were the only one who knew he was possessed by Bill the first summer he came to Gravity Falls

-Every time Dipper leaves you to go back to California he’s a MESS

-You guys are constantly calling and texting

-Mabel and Dipper use any and every excuse to go to Gravity Falls

-Every time Dipper comes back to Gravity Falls he holds you for HOURS and claims that he “has to make up all the times I wasn’t cuddling you”

-Everyone loves you two together

-Mabel is your number one supporter

-Dipper loves you with all his heart and would do anything for you

-Moral of the story is Dipper Pines is the best boyfriend ever and I wish he was real

————————————————————————

Thanks for the request anon!! Please leave requests if you have any! Also I won’t be writing as often as I would like because I have school and volleyball now 🙄. I am working on making my last one shot a series so if you guys have ideas of what to put it in write it in the comments or send me a request. Thank you all for all the likes!

[prazinos]

Love At First..Sight?

Summary ~ You’ve been pining over Ajax Petropolus for what feels like forever. But there’s no way he could reciprocate your feelings, right? You would actually be surprised

WARNINGS ! ~ Minors DNI | Sexual Innuendos | Fluff

You always liked the young gorgan boy with his sweet smile and lovely sense of humour. You’ve had a tiny crush on him for a while but you’d never act on your feelings of course, but your friends were getting sick of you pining over him

‘Oh my god Y/N just go and talk to him, he won’t bite!’ Bianca groaned, you ignored her attempts at trying to get you to fess up ‘the worst he can do is say no!’ She continued.

‘What’re we talking about?’ Enid asked walking over to the table you, Bianca, Wednesday and Xavier were sitting at. Bianca groaned rubbing her eyes with her hands

‘I believe they’re talking about Ajax, Cara Mia’ Wednesday said, not looking up from her book. You watched as Enid’s eyes lit up from the nickname, and you wished Ajax would call you something like that. Enid sat down next to Wednesday resting her head on Wednesdays shoulder grimacing at what Wednesday was reading.

‘Okay listen, Y/N, you are gorgeous, funny, kind, smart, what’s there not to like?’ Bianca asked

‘I don’t know, I just don’t think he reciprocates my feelings’ you respond gloomily.

You walked next to Bianca in the large, long hallway. Thinking about Ajax once again, what can you say? He was gorgeous and you’ve always seen glimpses of his snakes when one of them comes out from under his beanie but you wondered what he would look like without the beanie. Granted, you would be stoned but you think being stone for a few hours is worth seeing his ‘hair’.

You and Bianca finally arrived to Serial Studies and watched as Bianca ran to sit next to Xavier, which confused you. While yes they’re on good terms and are friends after they broke up, she’s never rushing to sit next to him.

You look around the room for a free seat and notice there’s only one. Next to Ajax. You glared at Bianca and Xavier who both just snickered.

As you sat down Ajax gave you a tight lipped smile before writing down some notes.

You finally heard the sweet melodic sounds of Nocturne in A minor. Signalling that class was over, you quickly walked out of the classroom not being able to control the blush on your neck and face. You practically ran back to your dorm slamming it shut with your telekinesis and had a pillow to fly towards you before screaming into it, what if Ajax realised you had a crush on him? What if he thought you were weird? What if-

You heard knocks on your door and you groaned, walking over to it before swinging it open

‘Enid we’re not supposed to hang out until seven’

You cut yourself off when you noticed that there wasn’t a bubbly multi colour haired girl standing in front of you, instead a tall lanky snake haired boy stood before you. Your eyes widened before he spoke

‘Hey uh-sorry I didn’t mean to intrude I just noticed that you kinda dropped something and I’m here to, you know give it back’ Ajax said awkwardly, you looked at his outstretched hand taking the piece of paper that was being held.

You unfolded it to realise it was a drawing that Xavier had done for you, it was of yourself and Ajax sitting on a windowsill drinking from plastic cups, talking. Well you were laughing. Something that had actually happened at a party, Xavier had drawn it for you for your birthday and you had kept it in your notebook because you love looking at it.

Ajax must’ve noticed your flushed face and he stepped inside, and closed the door

‘Look um Y/N I was never gonna say anything but I um-I think you’re really pretty and cool and smart and god you always make me laugh and sometimes when im lying in bed thinking about you I wonder if your thinking about me and it sounds crazy I know but-‘

You cut him off by shoving him against the closed door with your telekinesis and grabbing him to pull him down by his collar before kissing him,

He froze at first before relaxing into the kiss and moving one of his hands to your jaw, then your cheek. You smiled into the kiss as did he. You don’t think anything could feel better than this.

After what felt like forever you finally pulled back feeling lightheaded after kissing for so long. You opened your eyes only to jump back in fear

Ajax looked mortified as he heard hissing and looked down to see his beanie on the floor. What he didn’t understand was how you weren’t stoned

After your initial shock and after calming down realising you weren’t stoned nor were going to get stoned, the snakes looked at you in almost admiration,

Ajax was still frozen still, did you think his snakes were weird? Terrifying?

‘They’re so cute oh my god’ you said reaching out to his head, the snakes allowed you to lightly pat them with the tip of your finger and Ajax relaxed ‘i don’t even know how I’m not stoned’ you continued.

Ajax smiled as his leaned down to kiss you again. You giggled into the kiss as you felt the snakes tickling the sides of your face, Ajax broke away laughing as well and he hugged you.

‘panemorfi’ he whispers into your hair

‘What?’

‘Gorgeous’ he smiles down at you. You smile back a warmth covering you from head to toe, you always thought it was cute how Wednesday called Enid Cara Mia but being called panemorfi by Ajax it was something else, the way it rolled off his tongue sent shivers down your spine.

You glanced at the clock before glancing back down at the boy who was asleep, his head resting on your stomach. You smiled as you stroked his snakes carefully and lightly. But the sweet moment was cut short as Bianca, Xavier, Wednesday and Enid burst through the door.

You were quick to pull the blanket over Ajax as you didn’t know if he would still stone them while asleep.

‘We’re supposed to be hanging out Y/N, what do you think you’re doing?’ Bianca asked

‘I-um nothing I guess I just fell asleep’ you answered hoping to be convincing

‘You’re a terrible liar Y/N’ Xavier sighed.

All of their eyes widened as they noticed your blanket move that couldn’t have been you. Then they heard yawning

‘What? Why am I-‘

You cut Ajax off by grabbing the beanie you had next to your pillow and shoving it over his face

‘Woah what were you guys doing?’ Bianca asked smiling wickedly

‘I believe the term is cunnilingu-‘

Wednesday attempted to answer before a hand was slapped over her mouth by Enid

You pulled the blanket down revealing Ajax and everyone gasped, Ajax smiled sleepily at them yawning again

‘He wasn’t doing anything I swear he was just asleep on my stomach and he had his snakes out and I didn’t know if they still work when he’s asleep’ you answered.

‘What that’s not possible just say that he was getting a taste of your-‘ Xavier groaned as Enid elbowed him in the stomach.

‘Actually it is possible, some have the ability to not be stoned if the gorgan is in love with them’ Bianca said casually.

You looked down at Ajax with wide eyes as he looked up at you, he looked so cute like this, he looked like a puppy and you smiled at him before tapping his side telling him to get up. He rolled off you before you went to your closet, quickly changing (out of sight) and back towards your friends.

‘You’re welcome to join us Ajax’ Xavier said smiling

Ajax nodded, adjusting his beanie before jogging over to you guys.

As you walked down the hall you, Wednesday, Enid, and Bianca walked in a line and behind you the boys were talking. Faintly thought you all heard a disturbing conversation.

‘So dude do you have like snakes for pubes?’

‘XAVIER!’

A/N ~ Wow two in like a few hours although this one isn’t smut ! Also please know I did use google translate </3

I also will be doing requests as soon as I do a post about boundaries and stuff <3

Thank you whoever said Cara Mia was Italian not Spanish oh my god I’m an idiot 😭

Please let me know if you enjoyed this by Liking, Reblogging, Commenting, or following!

Cara Mia ~ My Beloved {Italian}

Penamorfi ~ Gorgeous {Greek}

Thank you my loves <3

[superprincesspea]

Courted by the Dragon

Chapter 14 - Secrets and Sapphires

Aemond Targaryen is both the cause and witness to the greatest humiliation of your life. You would rather die than see him again. Yet summer at court and the precipice of civil war have other ideas.

Masterlist

~~~

Maris’ anger had not diminished in your absence, and she was certainly glad of the thunderous scolding you received from your father.

His finger pointing, his voice booming so loudly you imagine half the keep can hear it.

Stupid, careless, girl.

He was right, you had been careless. You’d lost yourself in Aemond’s company and what could be more careless than that?  

Except, that wasn’t why he was angry. You'd gone missing for hours and your mothers' cheeks were still stained with tears. 

“I’m sorry,” you say, and you mean it, “I won’t let it happen again.” 

“You shouldn’t even let her join us in the hall tonight!” Maris pipes in when the shouting has dwindled down to a halt, her eyes narrowed and vengeful.  

But her attempt at siding with your father is soon thwarted because Borros Baratheon doles out the punishments, not his daughters, and a fresh wave of anger washes over him. 

“Quiet girl!” he snaps, before returning his attention back to you, his voice booming again, “you’ll get changed and you’ll do it quickly or so help me!”  

You don't need to be told twice, and rush to your room, pulling a yellow gown from your armoire before thinking better of it.  

Maris already thought you were trying to steal Aemond and, in her mind, yellow was the colour to do it in. So, you reach for the sapphire blue, making tonight its third outing of the summer and perhaps its final one too.   

You’re still fiddling with the tiny buttons when Cassandra sneaks into your room with a pitying look.  

She sits patiently on the bed, waiting for you to finish before picking up your brush and nudging you onto the stool next to your vanity. 

“We can’t have you looking like this,” she says, her voice cheerful as she gently pulls the brush through all the knots which had formed in the rain. 

Trying not to wince each time she hits a snag, you sit quietly, miserably , worrying the skirt of your dress and wishing your father had forced you to stay behind.  

You're still shaken from the way his voice had boomed in your ears, and you’d rather curl up in a ball and cry, instead of facing an evening of polite conversation and Maris’ seemingly endless supply of anger.  

“She’ll get over it,” Cassandra says, and you know she’s right but that doesn’t make it any easier. If you could skip forward to a place where Maris didn’t hate you, you would, but there was no quick fix, only time.  

“And...” she begins, waiting for you to meet her eye in the mirror, “ I think we both know she never had a chance.”  

Heart suddenly in your throat, you look at your hands, hoping to hide any of the thoughts which may have escaped onto your face.  

But Cassandra doesn’t need any confirmation of what she already knows to be true. 

“I do not believe I’ve ever seen Prince Aemond look at Maris the way he looks at you,” she says, and you stiffen, it was exactly what the Queen had said at the tourney. 

“If you knew why , you would be ashamed to have me as your sister.” 

You look up from your hands just in time to see Cassandra’s eyes widen with horror, the brush stopping its progress.  

“Do not tell me you have given him your virtue?”   

“No! ” you say quickly, surprised by her suggestion.  

Though, for one brief moment, you can’t help but imagine what that would be like.  

High Valyrian rolling from his tongue, long fingers wrapping around your waist instead of books. Would his kiss be gentle, hesitant even? Just a soft, momentary press of lips to test your willing.  

Or would it be certain? Urgent? Would he push you up against the bookcases, hard and feverish, his lips devouring yours before finding the racing pulse at your neck, his hands moving from your waist, hitching up the skirts of your dress and-  

Clearing your throat, you banish the thought away, but not quickly enough. Your cheeks are more than a little flushed when you admit, “I met him before we came to court.”  

“Where ?” 

“On the beach below the keep.”  

She laughs, her brow knitted with confusion, “why didn’t you tell anyone?” 

“Because I was alone… and I was…” you hold your tongue, could you really tell her the truth?  

“I was swimming ,” you whisper, and it feels both cathartic and terrifying at the same time.  

Cassandra’s fingers fall from your hair altogether and you dare not look at her in the mirror. Instead, you turn to meet her, face to face, your heart pounding harder than before, your palms slick with sickening nerves. 

Yet, instead of shame you find anger, an emotion which barely ever registers on her face, and her voice is low, tense .  

“Did he hurt you?” she demands in a hushed whisper which is no less powerful than your fathers bellowing. 

“No ,” you gasp, knowing precisely what she is thinking as you reach to touch her arm and reassure her, “he only looked, but he has teased me about it all summer.” 

She laughs then, relieved , her hands returning to your hair. “No wonder he looks at you like that .” 

“Like what?” 

“Like he is constantly on the brink of kissing you.” 

Your cheeks flush yet again, but Cassandra’s tone hardens, scolding you. “You know you really should have told me this months ago. And Maris. How could she ever stand a chance when Prince Aemond had already fallen in love with you?” 

“He loves tormenting me, nothing more.”  

“If you say so,” Cassandra teases before shaking her head, “I still cannot believe you thought you could keep this a secret. Heavens, you can be so wilful sometimes.” 

“But you’ll promise not to tell anyone?” you say, desperately, and by ‘anyone’, you mean Maris. 

“We are sisters, your secrets are mine to keep, not to share,” she reassures, sliding the last pin into your hair and you relax, turning on the stool to hug her tightly.  

It was strange, but despite all your torment, you hadn’t realised just how much you’d needed such comfort until her arms were wrapping around your shoulders and she was kissing the top of your head.  

It was no secret that you and Cassandra had never been as close as you and Maris, who were like partners in crime compared to your perfect, angelic, older sister. But her embrace is so steadfast, that it seems impossible to imagine you could have any better friend or sister than her. 

“You know...” she starts, as you pull away from the embrace, “we never did get to the bottom of who sent us these gowns...” 

You look down at your dress, the sapphire bodice glimmering with gems, and she was right. After trying to thank Tyland Lannister, you hadn’t really wanted to think who could have bought them. Or why. 

“Helaena told me that when Aemond lost his eye, they offered to replace it with gold,” she pauses for dramatic effect, “he chose a sapphire instead.” 

“A sapphire?” you choke, picturing the way it might glitter beneath the patch across his eye. So beautiful, so radiant.  Just like your gown.  

Then you think of the times you’d wore the dress in front of him and feel as though you might be sick. From nerves, from anger, from the sheer audacity of the knowing smiles you’d seen on his face each time. 

Were you really wearing something he’d picked out?   

You didn’t want to believe it, but who else could afford such a thing?  

Who else would choose this exact shade of sapphire blue?  

Hurrying towards your armoire, you reach for the yellow gown once again but it's too late. Your father's voice is booming into your room and it's time to leave, whether you’re ready or not. 

Cursing the entire situation, you trail behind your family all the way to the hall, wondering how long it would take them to notice if you decided to slip away. If you hadn’t gone missing this afternoon, you would chance it, but you’re not sure you can withstand any more of your father's anger. 

Instead, you think, so what if Aemond chose your dress? It didn’t mean anything .  

Except, you can’t even hold that lie in your brain for more than a moment before it falls apart.  Because it did mean something. Everything he’d done meant something . 

He’d met you on the beach in spring and thought of you often enough to invite you here for summer, to choose the books on your nightstand, and purchase the most beautiful gown you’d ever seen, for no other purpose than to see you standing in a room wearing the exact shade of his eye.  

Yet, the same man who’d done all those things, had also stolen more than one look at your naked body, threatened all your suitors, toyed with Maris, told everyone you couldn’t dance, embarrassed you in front of his mother, and killed Ser Glover in cold blood. 

He was impulsive, arrogant and completely ignorant to anyone’s feelings but his own. You still hated him, a few hours in the library couldn’t change that.  

You could only pray that he would not be in the hall tonight because hating him and facing him were too very different things.  

Yet there he was. Across the room. A dark line of fine black leather, his eye meeting with yours, holding all your attention before it slowly sinks to your dress.  

The slightest twitch of a smile quivers at his lips, and you know, beyond any doubt, that he was the mysterious secret admirer who’d sent three gowns to the Baratheon sisters. One pink, one lilac and one sapphire blue. 

You swallow hard and he begins to move, abandoning the people he was in conversation with, his usual cocky gait carrying him quickly across the room and, more importantly, directly towards you.  

He’s already made it halfway before you jump into action. 

Seven hells!  

What was he thinking?  

He was Aemond Targaryen. When he walked, people watched.  

Maris watched.  

He couldn’t just walk right up to you like this. He wasn’t the kind of man who walked right up to anyone- unless he was threatening them.  

Breaking away from your family, you skirt around the edge of the room, and he changes direction. Another smile twitching at his lips, as though he’s enjoying the chase. But you’re not going far, just far enough so Maris cannot see past the crowds. 

You wait for Aemond by a thick stone column and, when he’s close enough, you push him behind it, so you can be hidden from all the prying eyes that might be watching.  

“We can find more privacy than this if you wish to have me alone, issa jorrāelagon,” he says, a devilish smirk now filling his cheeks entirely. 

You sigh sharply, “that is the last thing I want!”  

“Are you certain?” his gaze scrapes down, to where the tips of your fingers are still pressed against his chest, “then why are you pinning me against a wall?” 

Embarrassed , you snatch your hands away, knotting them behind your back, your heart thumping as he laughs, enjoying every ounce of your torment as per usual. 

Then you let out an exasperated sigh, wondering, yet again, how you’d spent so many hours with this man.  

“You cannot just walk right up to me in front of the entire room,” you warn and, though a small frown creases into his brow, amusement still holds sway over his face.  

“How else am I to ask you to dance?”  

“You cannot!” you exclaim tartly, appalled to think that was what he was planning on doing. “You cannot even speak to me in front of them. I forbid it .” 

“You forbid your prince?” 

“Yes , Maris hates me enough as it is and, if you consider yourself my friend , you will do no more harm between us.” 

At that, you try to leave, feeling you have already spent far too long with the most conspicuous man in the room, but his hand slides to your waist, holding you still. 

“Do you consider yourself my friend?” he asks, and you cannot think of anything more dangerous than friendship with a dragon, but you’d say anything to placate him. 

“We can be friends if you stay away from me.”  

He snorts, “that's a strange recipe for friendship, would you not say?” 

“Not if the friendship is already strange,” you retort before pulling away from his grasp and heading straight towards your family, only to be intercepted by Lord Boremund before you can even make it five paces. 

“Little cousin,” he says, taking your hand, “please allow me the honour of your first dance this evening.” 

You accept, glad to be away from Maris for as long as possible and surprised when Ser Robin asks for your next dance, then Lord Thorne for your third.  

It seemed Aemond had not only allowed Tyland Lannister to resume the pursuit of your hand, but half of court too. Yet, like Tyland Lannister, it only made these men seem both spineless and fickle. 

Were they all afraid of a dragon?   

So, instead of feeling pleased to be dancing with them, you find yourself feeling increasingly annoyed, and you’re not the only one. 

Throughout every turn you make around the floor, you see Aemond pacing the edges like a caged animal and three dances is all it takes before he breaks. 

He strides fast, unconcerned by the movement swirling to avoid him, and you watch his every step with both heart pounding surprise and gut-wrenching exasperation, as he sweeps into Lord Thorne’s place and steals your hand without a single word to the other man.  

“What are you doing?” You hiss under your breath, extremely conscious of the scene he is creating.  

“It seems I cannot be your friend, ” he retorts, but you hardly hear him, you’re too busy looking around. Pleased to see that people are not pointing or staring, and the dance is continuing as though nothing is amiss.  

It’s only Lord Thorne who looks out of place, his cheeks flushed with anger, his steps faltering as he tries to move around the other couples.  

At this point, you think it might actually draw more attention if you stop dancing, but that doesn’t mean you have to be happy about the situation. You’re so mad at Aemond, you could stamp on his stupid foot. 

“You could have at least waited for the next dance,” you scold, knowing you would have rejected his offer, if he had actually asked.  

“I want all your dances, including this one,” he says, leading you into a turn and when you’re facing him again, you glare, ensuring he knows that, despite your current actions, you’re still very much annoyed. 

“And you think nothing of what I want?” you say. It was not half an hour since you’d told him not to speak with you, let alone dance with you. Yet here you were, in his arms. 

“Would you rather dance with them instead of me ?” 

Words stick on your tongue, and you're glad for another turn, so you can think of an answer, because you can’t exactly tell him ‘no’ .  

You wouldn’t rather dance with them.  

Lord Boremund was your cousin, Ser Robin was far too tall, and Lord Thorne was perfectly fine and perfectly handsome, except his touch did not set your skin ablaze as Aemond’s did.  

You face him again, and you must say something, so you think of propriety and all the rules which had been drummed into your head since you were old enough to walk. “As an unmarried lady, I shall not be obliged to give special treatment to anyone, even his grace.” 

“Then marry me.” 

What?  

You’re so surprised, you can’t help but laugh, your mind spinning, your cheeks heating beyond reason. “ Be serious, ” you say, almost choking on the words as they splutter from your lips. 

“I am,” he replies with a low voice, and he isn’t joking. He’s waiting, wanting, but you cannot possibly give him the answer he craves. 

You cannot even speak as he draws you in, holding you far closer than any man should in a room full of people. One hand on your lower back, the other brushing the length of your arm before he curls his fingers into yours.  

If there had been butterflies in the library, there are dragons now. Hatching carelessly in the pit of your stomach. Hot and dangerous, long wings reaching to the very tips of your toes until you feel flimsy in his sturdy embrace. 

You open your mouth, but there are no words, and what’s left is far worse than any words could ever be. You hate the sound which pants breathlessly from your lips, soft, submissive , welcoming his advances wholeheartedly.  

If you didn’t know any better, you’d say you were enjoying this. But you’re not. You don’t want him. Not as a friend, not as a husband.  

Yet your eyes still graze his lips, and you find yourself wondering, for the second time in a single evening, what it would be like to be kissed by him. 

"Marry me, Lady Baratheon,” he says again, and you both miss a step in the dance, almost colliding with another couple, before you regain control of your senses and wedge your free hand between your chest and his. 

Gods. You cannot meet his eye.  

“You do not dance well enough for me to condemn myself to marriage,” you whisper, your voice strained, before you force another laugh to break the tension. 

If he’s disappointed, he doesn’t show it, his tone is still light, playful even. “Is it marriage you disapprove of, or your prince?”  

You breathe out another shaky breath, but your voice is a little stronger when you say, “I do not disapprove of marriage. ” Only dragons.  

Aemond’s huff of amusement is light, meant only for your ears, and you’re grateful when the dance requires you to break from his arms and weave between the other partners. 

Inhaling a lung full of air, you’re certain not to let him reel you in again. Instead, you hold yourself rigid, your palm pressed against his chest to prevent any further encroachment into the battlements you’re trying desperately to defend. 

“Now behave yourself or I shall be forced to return to my room, for yet another evening,” you warn, daring to meet his eye. 

“Good ,” he smiles triumphantly, seeming to enjoy the way you’re struggling to hold him at bay, “I shall meet you there.” 

“With the guard outside the door?” you say hotly, imagining the look on Ser Maurin’s face if Aemond tried to waltz into your room without a chaperone. 

He leans in harder, forcing your arm to cave against his strength, “I shall climb in through the window.” 

When you turn again, you jab his rib, not too hard but hard enough to make him wince and remind him how difficult climbing would be with such an injury, “I think not , and in any case, I shall bolt it to be certain.” 

He chuckles and, though you’re not looking at him, you can picture just how smug his smile must be as he says, “you imagine a bolt across a window could stop me?” 

“No ,” you glance back to meet his eye, “but I’d hope his grace would not force himself into someone’s company if they had asked him to stop .” 

The music finishes before he can reply, and all the other couples break away with bows and curtsies to find someone new. 

But not you and Aemond. Aemond wants all your dances, and he does not relinquish control of your hand despite your efforts. He holds it tight, possessive, and you can feel as people begin to stare.  

“I shall scream if you do not let me go this instant,” you hiss under your breath, trying to remain composed. 

His jaw tightens, frustration seeming to cling to every muscle in his body just as he loosens his grip, sliding his hand behind his back so his stance is as formal as it is unyielding. 

When you turn to leave, you notice Maris who’s been staring at the whole scene with daggers instead of eyes.  

“If you truly care about me at all,” you begin, purposely avoiding his gaze, “you will ask someone else to dance this instant or I fear Maris will never forgive me.” 

Aemond snorts, “when you are here and she is in Storms End, it will not matter what she thinks.” 

“It matters to me!” you say, a little too loudly, but you’re so painfully annoyed with him that you can hardly be expected to contain your temper, “not that you seem to think of anything but your own selfish desires.” 

When you walk away, you feel him step to follow before he hesitates and turns on his heel to walk in the opposite direction.  

Not that you dare to look back or feel any relief that he has not followed you, you’re too anxious for that.  

Instead, you make it to where your sisters are standing with Belis, and Maris laughs as she says, “it seems Prince Aemond is pitying all the wallflowers with a dance this evening.” 

Then you do look at him and, just as you’d asked, he’s escorting another to the floor. Lady Staunten, who’d not danced all summer and seemed more terrified than pleased to be in his company. 

“Shall we take a turn of the room?” Cassandra offers with a warm smile and you’re grateful for another opportunity to leave Maris’ bad mood behind. 

“Did you ask him about the dress?” she says, when you are far enough away from the others and, quite honestly, you’d forgotten about the dress altogether.  

But you don’t say that, or anything, you’re too distracted, craning your neck to watch Aemond as he moves methodically across the floor, as though the dance holds no joy, only steps.  

Did he really just ask you to marry him?  

It was such a surprise, it felt like you could have imagined the whole thing. In fact, you wish you had imagined it. Then you wouldn’t have to think about it, and you were quite certain you could think of little else. 

It wasn’t every day a man asked you such a question- o r ever. But you couldn’t be entirely sure of Aemond’s motives. Did he truly want marriage and all that it entailed, or was it just another hot-headed impulse?  

Though you suppose none of that really mattered, since there were no circumstances in which you would agree to be his wife. Even if he wasn’t the most arrogant man in the world, he was still a Targaryen, and they were a strange family with even stranger proclivities.  

Yet, by the time you’ve walked an entire circle of the room, he’s asking another wallflower to dance, and you feel the unmistakable claw of envy, scratching at your skin. 

You turn away, wanting to forget about him but there was really no forgetting Aemond Targaryen. 

There wasn’t even safety in the bosom of your family. There was Alicent, talking to your mother with a coy smile and, for one heart stopping moment, you wonder if she knows . If they both know. 

Because marriage would not be a choice if your mother was involved. There would be no question about it, you’d be given to the crown without a single thought for your wishes, and that would be that .  

“Ah, Lady Baratheon,” Alicent says, noticing the way you’re lingering in her periphery.  

You curtsy politely, heart pounding as she waves her hand to beckon you closer.   

“We were just discussing how pleasant it would be to enjoy the last days of summer with a picnic in the Kingswood. Do you ride?”  

“Yes ." You even enjoyed it under usual circumstances.  

"Good,” she laughs, the curls in her hair bouncing with the movement, “there is not much room in the wheelhouse for so many ladies and the fresh air will give you vigour.”  

You start, thinking your mother might have something to say about the suggestion but she’s nodding along with the Queen. “You mean for me to ride all the way to the Kingswood?” you confirm, thinking it an unlikely ask for a high borne lady. 

“I’m sure one of the men will keep you company,” Alicent says as though it's the most natural thing in the world. But what she means is, Aemond will keep you company . 

Without thinking, you turn to look at him, annoyed that you cannot seem to retain autonomy over your own gaze, which seems intent to seek him out despite your wishes. 

When you turn back to look at Alicent, her smile reminds you so much of her son that you almost tell her to hell with the Kingswood and to hell with Aemond. But you’re sure your mother would have some choice words if you humiliated her in front of the Queen. 

So, you return her smile, thanking The Seven that Alicent has no idea her son just asked you to marry him. But she’s expecting it, you can see it on her face.  

What had Aemond said in the library? 

That she would finally think he was consenting to giving her a grandchild. Well, you aren’t consenting. As far as you were concerned, you had two older sisters and it was only proper that they should marry first. 

~~~

Thank you for reading!

[hsgucci94]

The frat boy’s girl

Word Count: 2.9K

A/N: not sure what this is but… hope you enjoy it!! x

masterlist

“Bye, Styles,” Y/N said, stopping in front of the bus stop, where their paths would now separate until the next morning, when they would reunite again in class for another day at college.

Harry had been texting all the way until that moment, and as soon as he heard her words he shoved his phone in the back pocket of his jeans and looked up at her. Y/N got momentarily lost in his eyes. As cheesy as it sounded, she couldn’t help it. His green, soft but daring gaze always got her mesmerised and forgetting for a moment where she stood in his life: right in the friend zone.

Harry Styles was this good looking, extrovert guy she ran into the first day of class. After a few lectures shared together, they hit it off and started hanging out either at the library or the caffe. Nowhere too fancy, but those moments were enough for the both of them to get to know each other a bit and for Y/N to realise that she only stood a chance with him if she was one of those sexy, long-legged girls that threw themselves at him at every party he got invited to, which were not few.

“You alright?” Harry asked her, frowning a bit.

“Uh-erm. Yeah, I’m fine,” she quickly replied, breaking out of her daydream. “Anyway, gotta go. Don’t miss me too much,” she added, slightly elbowing him with a sly smile on her face.

He laughed, and passed his hand through his hair, “Isn't that a hard task for you, sweetheart?,” he answered, emphasising the pronoun with an eyebrow raised.

She rolled her ayes as she tried to hide a smile, deep down wishing this playfulness between them was something more than just banter flirting. “Oh, it really got to your head, didn’t it? It was just one time, Styles. And I was drunk.”

“So?,” he walked the step that separated their bodies, his face now closer to hers, “Don’t drunk people always speak the truth?”

“Not me,” she said nonchalantly, pretending to be sincere.

But the gaze he had on her was making her nervous, the usual tingling that appeared on her stomach whenever he was close to her growing by the second. So she walked a step back subconsciously, which caused her back to hit the wall behind her. She was now trapped between the stone wall and his body.

“And what if I do? Miss you? Too much?,” he then asked, leaning in with a suggestive smirk.

“But you won’t,” her voice sounded lower than she expected, kind of showing the disappointment she felt in them, and cleared her throat to pretend that it had been intentional.

“But what if I do?,” he asked again, this time whispering, as if the wind could just take his words away if she didn’t react to them the way he expected her to.

“Don’t mess with me, Styles…”

“I’m not,” he shook his head slightly, still staring at her; his eyes jumping between hers trying to decode them. Months of being friends with her and he still couldn’t read her as well as we wished. “Fuck,” he mumbled, looking away just for a moment before turning his head back in her direction.

He hesitated at first, and then kissed her like her lips were air and he couldn’t breath. His lips fit on hers like they were made for each other, and for the first time since his last relationship Harry felt comfortable playing it safe with someone, and that someone was her.

***

The moment she hit send, she puckered her lips together and tried to contain a squeal. That Thursday was definitely one for the books, not only because Y/N had the guy she had been hung on for months kissing her in the middle of the street, but because he kind of seemed to be on the same page as her when it came to them. And that was definitely a reason to celebrate. So when Harry texted her asking her to go to a party with him that same night, she didn’t turn down the invitation like many other times before.

This time she would go, even if it was happening on a school night and she had class early the following morning. This was a special occasion, you could say.

Harry even offered to come pick her up and drive them both there, but Naomi, Y/N’s roommate, was going as well, so they made plans to arrive there together. Besides, she needed a bit more time to process the kiss and how things were between Harry and her at the moment. Yes, they kissed. Yes, they even had a little make-out session in the open. But that was it. After all that kissing, he hugged her in a way he hadn’t before, and then left as she waited for her bus home to arrive, still trying to wrap her head around whatever got into him to act like that towards her all of a sudden.

Was her crush on him mutual? Was it not and she had just now become another girl he had made out with? Those unanswered questions that were making her insecure flew around in her head as Nao drove them to the party, but as soon as she arrived there and spotted him, her mind simply went blank. She usually talked to Nao about how every part of her body paralysed whenever he was around, and how dumb she became whenever he asked her random questions that were not college related, only because he made her hella nervous.

Harry was standing close to the door, a red cup filled with unknown alcohol in hand as he talked to some guys. His usual black t-shirt, black jeans and brown Chelsea boots outfit was now combined with a red and black flannel, making him stand out among all those people. She looked around to see if she could find some else she knew apart from Nao, but of course she could not. The people she usually surrendered herself with were not big party fans, to be fair.

So there she was, in a frat party where she knew no one apart from her roommate, her roommate’s boyfriend Ryan and the guy she was friends with and who she had kissed a few hours before. Great. Simply great. Much to her disgrace, Nao and Ryan had already found each other and were now kissing like no one was watching. So Y/N was left alone, meaning she had to walk up to Harry and see if he wanted to be his guardian angel for the night. At least until her social battery ran out and was ready to go home.

“Hey,” she approached him, trying to sound confident even though she was currently so out of her comfort zone. The moment he heard her voice Harry turned around, the corners of his mouth lifting enough to show a small smile. That gesture was enough to ease Y/N’s anxiety.

“You came!,” he chuckled, “Was not sure if you’d stood me up this time, too.”

“Hey!,” she protested, although he was right to think there was a chance she would do that. After all, that was the first party invitation she accepted from him all year. “I’d rather do quieter plans, that’s all,” she shrugged her shoulder, smiling shyly.

He shook his head, this time smiling from ear to ear, because even though she didn’t enjoy crowds, she was now sharing the night with him. “These are my mates, by the way: Lindsay, Cameron and Jeremiah,” Harry then added, pointing at them as he said their names.

“Hi, I’m Y/N.”

“Hey. It’s so nice to finally meet you,” said Cameron.

To finally meet her? Had Harry talked to his friends about her?

Before Y/N could give it a second thought Harry grabbed her hand and guided her to the kitchen. That would have shocked anyone, that he had her hand inside his, but he did it quite often, specially when he had to make her go outside of the building because she’d rather spend her lunch breaks at the library than around campus.

The kitchen was empty enough for them to find a quiet place where he could fix her a drink.

“You’re gonna love it. Trust me," he assured her, grabbing the vodka and mixing it with the juice that had already been added to the cup.

Y/N loving an alcoholic drink? Yeah..., good luck with that, Harry. She was not very fond of drinking anything that wasn’t either water or coke. Zero, of course. She just didn’t enjoy the strong taste or the aftermath of consuming those other beverages.

“So what exactly convinced you to come here this time and not any of the other past ones?," Harry asked her.

“You,” she replied right away. He smiled, his eyes focused on his hands and the drink that was in the making in front of him. He didn’t want it to turn out too strong; just soft but tasty.

“Yeah?”

“Yeah. Your text was pretty convincing, to be honest.”

“Oh. My text did this?,” he looked her up and down to point out her presence.

“Well, your kissing helped, too.”

“That’s more of what I like to hear.”

“Of course you do,” she rolled her eyes, but while doing so she missed his cheeks blushing a bit.

He then turned his body to her, "Here. Try this." He handed her the cup and she took it, hesitantly. When she brought it to her lips and tasted it, she had to confess it was quite good. She could drink a few of those tonight. "Like it?," he rose an eyebrow, a cocky smile plastered on his face.

"Mm-hm," she took a another sip, passing her tongue over the corners of her mouth after. Yeah, it was definitely good.

"Cool. Now that you're settled for the party, let's got back in there," and he grabbed her hand again, his drink on his free one.

He walked ahead of her to make sure she could move through the crowd without feeling trapped or anxious, and soon they were back with Harry's friend, on the same spot. They were pretty nice lads, specially because they made sure she felt included by asking her questions about herself and telling her some of their crazy adventures of their almost-ending freshman year in exchange, which got her laughing out laud and causing Harry to smile while staring at her.

At some point he was feeling so good and so comfortable and happy she actually was there he felt like hugging her even from behind. That gesture had not been meditated; it just happened, and he enjoyed that more than the fact that her back was glued to his chest and he could rest his chin on her head and smell her shampoo without any effort. Him grabbing her hand was one thing, but him passing his arm around her neck as he pulled her to him was a completely different one.

“I’m too comfortable right now it’s scary,” she admitted, only loud enough for him to hear. His friends were arguing about something Jeremiah said; apparently it didn’t happen that way, or at least the rest of them didn’t remember it happening that way.

“Me, too,” Harry replied, and then caressed her ear with his lips, before whispering: “I want to kiss you again.”

His words caused her stomach to flip, but also her blood to momentarily freeze. She was not the type to make out with boys at parties, but she wanted to be his type. So she turned around to face him and tiptoed so that her eyes were almost at the same height as his.

"Hi," she said, shyly.

"Hi," he replied, chuckling a bit. And just when she thought he would close the space between their mouths and kiss her like he did earlier that afternoon, he said: "Wanna go somewhere?" She frowned. "C'mon, I think you'll like it," he added.

"Okay," she nodded.

By the time they were getting out of there, girls she had seen around college were staring at Y/N and their entwined hands as if she was stealing her man, so she looked somewhere else until they were both inside his car.

"Oh, yeah, you were right. I do like McDonald's," she spoke in a half-half-not sarcastic tone, seeing how he was directing the car to a drive-through.

Harry chuckled, shaking his head, "Oh, hush. This isn’t our final destination, just a little stop on the way. Plus, what else would be open right now other than Macas?"

He was right. It was past midnight and very few food places were still serving dinner at that time. She was a hamburger over pizza kinda girl, anyway, so it was fine.

"So you wanted to get us out of your frat party to grab McDonald's and come to the beach." Harry had just parked his car in front of the beach, which was solely and beautifully illuminated by the streetlights. Y/N was half-way through her hamburger, while Harry hadn’t started eating his yet, since he was not one to eat and drive at the same time.

"No," he calmly replied. He put a bunch of fries in his mouth and chaw them before saying: "I wanted to spend time with you alone. Without any disturbance."

That and the fact that he knew her well enough to know how little she liked partying. He wouldn’t tell her, but he had truly enjoyed seeing her join his plan and meeting his lads at his frat house. So after a couple of hours he figured it was time she got out of there. He wanted to talk to her, and didn’t believe the party to be the place to do so anyway.

"Wanna go skinny dipping?," she said out of the blue, catching him so off-guard.

"You skinny dip?," he lifted an eyebrow.

"I don't, but I also don't do most of the stuff I did today so why not add skinny dipping to the list?"

"Okay," he nodded, a smile peeking through his lips, "Alright. Let's go."

Harry didn’t even bother finishing his burger. They both got out of the car and started running towards the beach.

It was an early May night, and the summer weather was slowly making its comeback after 180 days of cold and rain. As Y/N ran towards the seashore, Harry following her right behind, she started to undress, leaving her clothing scattered on the sand. She left her panties on, though, and was discretely-not-so-discretely covering her bare chest with one of her arms wile sprinting towards the sea.

The faster she would get in the water, the better, she thought.

Harry figured he would leave his boxers on too, even though that wasn’t the purpose of skinny dipping. But then again, who cared? It was their plan, and therefore they were the ones making the rules. Whatever made her feel comfortable was fine.

When she was just about to get her feet in the water, he came running and grabbed her from behind, lifting her off the ground and earning a squeal from her.

"Harry!," she laughed, as the guy tightened his grip around her stomach, securing her in his arms, "Put me down!"

He chucked, and kept on running in the water until it reached up to his waist. He then stopped and let her touch the wet sand with her two feet.

"Why did you do that for?," she complained, facing him, and trying her best not to laugh or he wouldn’t believe she was pissed.

"You would have backed down once you felt how cold it was!," he laughed, and started tickling her on the sides.

"Stop!," she giggled, "And that's not true! I would have got in regardless." She giggled again, which gave away her little white lie.

"Oh, c'mon! I'm your best friend. I know you by now."

"You are?"

"Yeah. Is there anyone you have spent more time with this year other than me? I don’t think so," Harry chuckled, keeping on tickling her. He was right.

They have been thick as thieves most of the time. She bit the inside of her cheek, and Harry stopped the tickling. "What?", he asked, suddenly concerned he had hurt her.

"Best friends don't kiss."

Oh. He gulped at her words, and closed the little space left between their bodies, "Well..., that's because I want to be upgraded."

Y/N's breath got stuck in her chest. He noticed her sudden reaction, so before he could back down, he cautiously grabbed one of her hands in his and locked their fingers together. Harry then leaned into her slightly, and they sealed with their lips the pact that officially made them boyfriend and girlfriend.

Please, like & share if you liked it? it’ll help so much 🥺✨thanks!! x

full masterlist

[chvnnie]

My hard this today are soft dom bossy Chan. Literally desperate for a kiss, willing to follow any command.

It’s a Chan day and I LOVE it.

SMUT - MINORS DNI

Anything baby could ever want, baby gets. You don’t even have to ask, really; just bat your lashes at him and push your lower lip out a teeny bit, and he’s at your service.

Hungry? Let’s feed you. Sleepy? Lay your head on his chest, he’ll keep you warm. Need a new book/dress/literally anything? Charge it to his card.

Chan makes sure the world is at the palm of your hands. It’s what you deserve, after all. If anything, he wishes he could give you more.

But today, you’re request is simple.

“Pleaaaassseee?” You whine playfully, scooting the rolly chair across the tiny studio to be right next to him. “Just one?”

Your boyfriend doesn’t look up from his laptop, headphone only covering one ear to listen to your pleas. “Give me like…three more minutes, baby. I just really need to finish this—“

“It’s just a kiss, Chan.”

The way his eyes shut when he sighs tugs on his heart. He hasn’t been sleeping much, too busy trying to ready everything for this comeback that he’s put himself on the backburner. You’ve been giving him space and support, wanting to be there for him during his busy season. Understanding when he doesn’t come home or answer calls, or when he has to leave mid date night because Jisung deleted a file…again.

But you really feel like this isn’t a big ask. That’s why you keep pressing it.

“Baby, please.” He finally looks at you, and the exhaustion is heavy in his dark eyes. “My focus is going to break if I stop for even a second. Let me do this, and then I’m all yours. I promise.”

It’s not a big ask from him. It’s only a short amount of time — you probably won’t even notice it passing.

But God, his lips are so soft. So plush. You just want to feel them, to bite them.

With a pout, you roll back over to your corner. Pick up your book, mumbling an “‘Kay” in defeat. Want for nothing your ass; you’ve never been so desperate for something.

Each second feels like hours. Minutes like years. Chan lied — it took him five. Five whole minutes, and then the headphones are haphazardly thrown on the desk. Click, click, click. File save AND locked to prevent it from “disappearing” (“I swear, hyung!” Jisung whined over the phone. “I didn’t do anything it just…disappeared!”).

“Baaaaaby.” He singsongs, this time scooting over to you. “Guess what time it is—“

The look you shoot him makes him pause his movements, only making it about halfway. Eyebrows raised, he tilts his head to the side in confusion.

“What’s wrong—“

“Don’t wanna talk.” You say, pulling your knees to your chest. Pretending to be too into your book to pay him mind. “Just give me three minutes.”

With a sigh, your boyfriend takes his beanie off. “Baby-“

“All I wanted was a kiss.” You pout even harder, dropping the paperback book on the desk. “But noooooo.”

The fuss your making about a little kiss is a little much. It wasn’t like it was that long of a time to wait, it’s already over. Normally, Chan wouldn’t entertain this type of behavior. Would correct it immediately — this? This is the hill you want to die on?

But today it’s so…cute. He can’t help but chuckle, continuing his journey over to you.

“Aww, pouty girl.” He coos, reaching out to pinch your cheek. You try to swat his hand away, but he’s not budging. “No need for all this.”

“Chan.” You try your best to keep your voice firm, as if he can’t feel your cheeks flushing, the heat burning his fingertips. “Stop it—“

“If you want one so bad, come get it.”

His tone is playful. So, you give in. Using your chair, you get closer to him. Chan is perfectly still, giving you a smile as you close in on him. Nose to nose, lips not even an inch apart—

Pushing on his toes, he slides his chair all the way across the room.

“That’s not fair!”

“Oh? Do you not want it then?” His smile grows wicked. He knows what you want — but silly, silly girl. Did you think it would be that easy? “Come on, then.”

Thus starts the game. You get out of the chair, rushing over to him. You get all the way into his lap, closing in quickly when he dodges your lips. As you cry out in frustration, he grabs your hips. Stands up. Turning on his heels, your back is now pressed to the wall.

“You’ve got to try harder!” He laughs. “It’s like you don’t really want it.”

“You’re mean.” You pout, palms finding his shoulders and attempting to push him away. As if you’re not pinned to the wall. Under his mercy.

“Oh, am I?” His voice is laced with faux sadness, the fake emotion taking over his entire face. Lips, eyes, brows. Acting like your insult cut him deep. “That’s not nice.”

Right as you start to speak, a hand flies from your hips. Gripping your throat and squeezing until he hears a squeak.

“But you know what else isn’t nice?” It’s like a switch was flipped; eyes now dark, expression like stone. “When you get bratty with me from a simple request.”

How he manages to unbutton your jeans and shove them down with one hand, you’ll never understand. Or try to process; everything about Chan’s demeanor has rendered you useless. Watching with wide eyes, whimpering brokenly. Savoring the little gasps of air.

“Was it worth it?” Fingers run up and down your folds roughly, not bothering to be gentle with you. When they brush against your clit, you start to squirm. “That silly little kiss?”

He asks as if you’ve gotten it. You pout, trying to speak hopelessly. “S-still need it—“

“I don’t think so.” He clicks his tongue. “I’ll decide what you need.”

Without warning, two fingers sink inside your cunt. Stopping only when he hits the knuckle. There he spreads them, scissoring your walls open. The hands on his shoulders grip his hoodie. His grip, his fingers — it’s already making you dizzy.

“Silly baby.” Once he deems his work enough, Chan starts to plunge his fingers deeper. Making sure to feel every inch of you. “Maybe next time you should let Daddy work.”

[ff7-has-taken-me-over]

This one’s gonna be a first to see around here but the thought struck me and I saw someone say that if Zack survived, him, Aerith and Cloud would’ve been a triad and I one thousand percent agree.

So! Zack and Aerith would dote on Cloud so fucking heavily. Not in any, outstanding, buys him gifts and whatever he pleases sort of way but just in all the small gestures they do for him.

Cause Cloud is so effortlessly thoughtful despite being so painfully awkward sometimes. He hears Aerith has run out of tampons and he goes and gets her favourite brand even though her period is still weeks out.

Zack mentions his bike is making funny noises and he’s gotta wait for the next pay check to take it to a mechanic and he’ll just go and fix it himself without prompting.

Aerith complains one time about him and Zack hogging the blankets again and Cloud wraps her in her own blanket that same night, putting Zack in the middle so he can still cuddle both of them but will only fight Cloud for the blanket since they’re the two sharing.

It’s just all these little actions that he does because he’s so endlessly caring and he doesn’t even realise it sometimes and Zack and Aerith wanna return the favour however they can. But Cloud’s so quiet and is always content to just go along with them and whatever they want.

It’s embarrassingly hard to return such thoughtless actions when Cloud usually looks after himself whenever he needs or wants something. Always putting their priories ahead of his own and thinking it too bothersome to ask anything of them.

So they dote on him in other ways. Any way they can get away with and that won’t make Cloud clam up and isolate cause he thinks he’s being too much. Which is ridiculous cause he’s quite literally dating the human embodiment of a puppy and the sun, but they’re still working on that.

So Aerith gifts him flowers. Making crowns and placing them in his hair when it’s a day he can just sit back and relax. Or tucking them away in places he can find them easy when he’s moving around their shared spaces for jobs.

Zack goes out of his way to pick up food from Cloud’s favourite Junon place every so often, always lying and saying it was on the way back so Cloud doesn’t pout at him.

They both shower him in affection near constantly, brushing fingers through his hair and placing soft kisses on his cheeks and shoulders. Wrapping arms around his waist and leaning up against him or pulling him down, into their laps and simply holding him quietly.

Sometimes they manage a gift when he’s in one of his better moods. A new set of wrenches cause he somehow lost a few in the last set. A pair of riding goggles cause when he got tossed from his bike the last pair came off and broke. A new book or some graphite pencils for him to sketch the landscapes he sees when he’s out on deliveries that take him away from them.

It’s all in the little things they do for him. Cause they love him dearly and only wish for his happiness. Cloud had lived a tough life, they all had really, but Cloud always seemed to struggle with it the most. Still woke up panting and looking around frantically without actually seeing anything.

Still looked at them with so much longing and heartache that it broke their hearts to know they were technically the reasons it was there. Still sometimes hesitated before coming to them for affection. Like he was scared they’d turn him away or disappear the second he so much as breathed on them.

So they tried to dote on him as much as they could. Tried to return his effortless care and quiet affection in any way they could manage. Just for the hope that one day he wouldn’t be quite so scared anymore. That maybe he wouldn’t hesitate in letting them know when he needed them, and just so he knew they loved him. No matter how long any of it took.

[sparklecryptid]

*grins* AtB reveal AU where the Crystal makes a grandiose magical announcement whenever a Lucis Caelum is born. (Mors is seriously considering making Regis retake sex ed as the announcement comes again - and again - and again - in a matter of months. Regis is just wishing that the Crystal mentioned things like names or locations, not ‘Hail the birth of the son/daughter of the Stone! Hail!’)

More stares at Regis.

Regis is would normally meet his fathers gaze head on but-

Well.

Apparently Regis has eight children he that he lost track of.

“If this happens one more time,” Mors says with an expression on his face that would lead to Regis getting sent to his room when he was younger, “I’ll make sure you never step foot out of Insomnia again.”

-

Katrina sees the headlines announcing the birth of one of Regis’ children.

Then she sees those headlines again and again and as she carries Ace around her and Carly’s home as he babbles she wonders if she should head to Insomnia and tell Regis.

Ace makes a low whining noise in the back of his throat when he realizes his mother isn’t paying attention to him and Katrina laughs and showers him in kisses until he bursts into giggles again.

There are too many variables, Katrina decides, she’ll wait before introducing Ace to his family.

-

Ardor is found first, they find a scrawny child scavenging for food in the streets of Lestallum. They only catch him because he runs into another boy - slightly older - who sees Ardor throwing fireballs at the Crownsguard and joins in.

Cor stares at the report. He then stares at the red eyed child in front of him who is accompanied by a woman who looks like she would be more at home in a lab than in Cor’s office. She has a tight grip on her child and hovers close enough to Ardor to grab him and run if anything happens.

Her bright eyes stare at Cor and show no fear. She seems perfectly willing to fight Cor if the situation calls for it.

Cor wonders why he - at 19 years old - was put in charge of this.

-

Jules is found next. She had thrown a grown man into a wall with magic when said man attempted to harm her mother. Cor and Regis watch as Ardor takes one look at her and her mother and promptly decides that he’ll die for her.

Thanatos must be of the same opinion as he begins to bring her books.

-

Bard isn’t found so much as brought to Insomnia by her mother after Bard had decided to test out fire breathing.

“I figured,” her mother says in a voice that has seduced Regis in the past, “That if anyone can help her it’s the one who she inherited the magic from.”

Regis thinks of the part of the Citadel dedicated to his children and their mothers and thinks he must have to expand it.

-

Mercury shows up with an Imperial noblewoman who is currently seeking sanctuary.

“May I ask why the Empire has an arrest warrant out for you?”

“Well,” the blonde noblewoman says with a slight grin, “They can’t put one out for a child can they?”

In that moment Mercury must decide that she’s had enough of not being near her mother because she phases through the door to the interrogation room and demands her mother make her popsicles.

“Oh,” the noblewoman says and her grin widens, “There’s that too.”

-

Persephone and her mother walk into the Citadel as if they own it.

Persephone has her father sit down for tea and Regis has never been intimidated by a ten year old until now.

“If you hurt my mother,” Persephone says in a tone that is too mature for her age, “The Astrals themselves won’t be able to hide you from me.”

“Does your mother know you are threatening me?”

“She tried to discourage it.”

Regis feels a bit faint and wonders if Noctis will grow up to be like the rest of his siblings.

“I see.”

-

Jupiter and Ace arrive together having barely reached adulthood. They don’t exactly want to ask Regis to stop being a fucking tool and to ease restrictions on Galahdians seeking refuge but-

Well, listen, sometimes you have to do something uncomfortable to make change. They even made an appointment, they have proof of the appointment.

If only this fucking gate guard would believe them when they say they have an appointment.

Jupiter, because she has never bothered to pay attention to the lessons their uncle taught them in politics and diplomacy, decides that force is the right choice.

“If you don’t let us through,” Jupiter says, “I’m going to freeze you in place, and then I’m going to let my brother decide whether or not to electrocute you.”

“Please don’t tempt me,” Ace mutters under his breath.

“Threats? As if I can’t have you arrested for threatening a standing member of the military see if the Astrals will take pity on you-“

“Oh,” Jupiter says as she eyes the rapidly darkening skies, “I think they might.”

The formerly sunny day turns dark, thunderheads gathering directly above the Citadel. Jupiter watches as the guard does a double take when he realizes Ace’s eyes are glowing a bright gold-

“Shit,” the guard curses and scrambles away from them. The siblings watch amusedly as he frantically reaches for his com.

Rapid footsteps reach their ears and both Ace and Jupiter turn toward the sound. Princess Persephone looks like she just came from a sparring practice dressed in sweatpants and a tank top with her hands wrapped.

“I would prefer it, dear brother, if you didn’t summon Ramuh to wreak havoc on the city this fine morning.” Persephone speaks as if she knows them and Ace and Jupiter exchange a look.

The gold fades from Ace’s eyes and the weather clears.

“I wasn’t going to summon him,” Ace protests, “I was persuading the guard here to let us in for our appointment.”

Persephone raises a brow.

Ace meets her stare head on.

Jupiter cackles.

“He doesn’t have enough energy to summon Ramuh anyway,” Jupiter says, “Not after, well, you know.”

Persephone takes stock of her siblings appearances. They both look like they’ve been on the move for weeks without rest and the beads in their hair are all too telling about where they are from.

“We heard, I would extend my condolences but I expect they mean nothing.” Persephone turns toward the guard. Her eyes are ice as she looks at him. “I will be taking my siblings in to meet with our father. We will deal with you later.”

[koiir]

STAY

— If he had been with you, everything would be different.

Pairing - Kazuha x reader

Genre - angst without comfort

Cw - death of character, mentions of blood, not proofread inspired by the book, if he had been with me

Autumn became a season you and Kazuha looked forward to when you both were young, the leaves changing colors, the trees full of new color, soon to die because of the upcoming winter, it was a season that meant something to the two of you. Until now, now it was a dull season, the leaves dying past their time, reminding you of his time, before he soon was gone like the wind. His time past and overdue.

“Come catch me kazu!”

“I will, just like I always do.”

The two of you in your own world, playing with one another until the sun started to set. Him walking you home and then heading over to his which was right next door. A habit this became, leaving in the morning, and enjoying the autumn until it would become a winter. The leaves pilled together, jumping in and laughing together. The two of you always together no matter what.

What a lie that would soon become

Age thirteen was when Kazuha made it known to that he loved you, even though he always did, you now would know bye this one single act he did. A single kiss was all it took, sweet yet quick. He face flushed, awkward and uncertain of what he had done, not knowing what to do next.

“I want… I want to be with you [name], forever. I want us to hold hands like the people who I see on the streets. I… I want you to be mine.”

“Silly, I’m already yours! I’ll always be yours Kazu.”

Another small peck shared by you, and then the two of you hand in hand heading over to the place where you two called home.

Some would say this was puppy love, something that wasn’t going to last since you two were so young. But it wasn’t, because Kaedehara Kazuha was your first love, the one who understood you, the one who brought a new light into your life, the one who would stay by you side. You never saw a day without Kazuha, he was glued to you. Your parents knew of the so long friendship you two shared and soon they knew that one day, you would all be a family.

It was often Kazuha would come over to your place, or you to his, it was something that had been happening every since the age of 5. The two of you sick together, staying in the same room giggling and painting with one another, laying on the bed and talking about plans you two had come up with. Together. Even when Kazuha was no longer sick, he stayed with you until you were fine. He stayed, like he always hoped for. He stayed because he loved you, never wanting to let you go.

It stayed this way, until your 20’s

It was like a new fire had burned, one that would continue to burn, his heart seemed like it was going to break at what he had just witnessed.

“Don’t be stupid, Tomo.”

“I might be, but who’s the one who said ‘just because something seems impossible, doesn’t mean that you shouldn’t try.”

Kazuha wished he had never heard that, it was only meant for one person, you. Now that one sentence filled him with pain, one that would determine what he should do next.

“Kazuha, you can’t. You can stay with me, you’ll be safe! My family can pull some strings, they’ll make sure you’re safe! You won’t be found I promise Kazu just-“

He hated this, hated how his decision would impact you. The tears forming in your eyes, your voice shaking, your hand trembling trying to hold on. Hold onto him. He held it tight, giving it a small squeeze.

“I’m a wanted man now [name]. I can’t ruin your family’s reputation with all the connections they share. I don’t want to imagine what they would do to your family if it was discovered they had hidden a wanted man in their home, what could happen to you.”

You knew he was right, he always was. Kazuha knew the best, he would always be the one who helped you make decisions.

So why does it hurt knowing that he’s right?

“Then take me with you! It’s like you always wanted, we can leave together and then travel together.”

It was a dream of his to travel the world, he would always have a spark in his eyes while talking about where he wished to go.

One day, it will be just you and me.

Oh how you wished that could be true.

“That would be the worst option out there [name]. You’ve gotten so far, I can’t take that away from you. You have everything that you have ever wanted, it would be like taking away the treasure of Inuzuma. The people love you [name], they need you.

I need you Kazuha. You’re all i have ever needed, all I have ever wanted.

“Please Kazuha, I can’t lose you.”

A leaf now fell, it dead since its time has been long overdue. The leaf that use to be filled with color, the same color of the streak in his hair.

“I love you, I promise I will come back. I’ll sneak into your room and hold you all the night, but for now, I have to do what is best.”

Stay, stay in this moment. Stay with me.

But of course he never does, he leaves you with one last touch to your lips. Just like the one he did when you two were 13.

One last leaf fell, the last one before the tree was now empty. Just like now, how the one thing you needed the most had left, just like a wind in the breeze, not knowing at where to land next. He took your heart with him though, where ever he went it would remind him of you.

He promised, he would come back. Things would be the way they were meant to be.

He would make you his.

You knew Kazuha, he would fight till the very end and never lose. He was strong. You remember when you got your vision first, he was jealous that you had gotten one and he had not.

“You’ll get one Kazuha, I know it.”

“Then can we spar? You have to find a weapon that you can use, or are you interested in a sword?”

He had one, so it was only natural you wanted to be the same as Kazuha.

“A sword would be perfect.”

It was perfect, everything about it. The sword sharing a similarity with his. You always gazed at the writing imprinted on the sword base. Words from him.

The words you are now looking at, tears forming in your eyes once again as you cradle the weapon in your arms.

Home is with you

wherever you take this blade, think of me.

9 months, 18 letters from Kazuha.

It was twice a month in which he would write a letter to you, telling you of the events in his life.

Without you.

It was hard for you, hard to only have his writing to remember him by. Yet you’re grateful that he still puts the effort in. He would put effort in if it was for you.

19 letters now. The third this month.

The letter wasn’t one you expected, yet it filled you with hope and maybe, just maybe, this would be the last and final one until he was home.

To my dearest [name], I’ll be home soon. I made my promise to you, you remember it right? I’ve heard that you’ve been successful now more than ever. I love hearing your name wherever I go, I’m happy. Happy for you, glad that you have gotten to this point. I want to save my words until I’m back with you, together in the same spot we shared all those joyous memories and moments. I should be back by midnight. I still have the spare key, so I’ll do what I told you the night I left. I’ll sneak into your room and I will hold you all night. Just as I had promised. I love you more than you could every imagine [name], everything will be just as they should have. We’ll be happy, happy together. I’ll be home once again. Love Kazuha.

You tugged the letter tight, praying to the archons that he would be home any minute now. It was past midnight now, he could be home any minute now. He could be with you anytime now. The realization hit you, Kazuha would be home.

He would be back.

Footsteps could be heard out your room, the light on. It’s him, it has to be.

“Kazuha?”

Your heart now beating in your chest, wanting him so badly now that you felt your hand shake.

He’ll come and hold me, hold my hand and kiss me with the passion that burns in his heart for me.

The door started to open. He was home.

“Kazu?”

“Oh [name]” your mother says.

The autumn leaves falling down on the streets of Inuzuma, falling so freely without a care. One leaf falling on his heart, soon to be covered in his blood.

“Give me your hand” he said

“Why?”

“So you can feel what you do to me, what you do to my heart dove.”

Not a beat came from his heart as the leaf fell, he was gone. He wouldn’t come back home to you. Kaedehara Kazuha was dead. So close, yet so far. He was almost there. He was almost home until his life was taken from him.

His vision shinned with passion, noticeable in the night. Catching the eye of the culprits responsible for his death, the ones who wanted to kill him the moment he became a wanted man. The ones who wanted his vision.

“Kazuha wanted to give you this dear…” your mother stated. She placed the letter on your bed so you could grab it. She let you cry as she told you that your one and only was now dead. She left, knowing that you needed space.

You grabbed the letter, eyes blurry from the tears streaming down your face. Soon, more fell down your face as you saw the blood stains left on the letter.

This was his blood, his dna. The last thing he had left with you along with this letter.

To my one and dearest name, I’m sorry. I wish I could have fulfilled my promise to you. If only I had been smarted, been more attentive to my surroundings. You were always the one who noticed every single detail, no wonder you’re so smart name. I love that about you, that you seem to notice every single thing around you. I think that’s why I become more observant, I wanted to grow from you. I’m sorry I couldn’t be stronger for you, maybe I can. I’ll try, I’ll fight until I defeat every single one of them. Yet if I can’t, then I want to write this in case. I don’t want to leave you with nothing, so I’ll leave you with this. I’m sorry name, I love you and I hope you know that. It would be selfish of me to let you hung up on me, so love someone else. Find someone who loves you, more than me. I want you to be happy, I know you will be. I’ll leave my heart to you, in the form of a ring. The one my mother had before she died. I remember her always asking when we two were going to get married. She’ll be glad that you have this ring. I know you always loved her. I couldn’t make you mine name. Maybe some day, in another life I can. I’m sorry name. Love Kazu.

Why? Why him? He was almost home, and it was taken away from him in an instant.

No one would love me more than you do Kazuha.

You’re all I need, all I’ve ever wanted.

You saw the ring, one you saw as a child from his mothers ring finger.

“Kazu, your mother has such a pretty ring! I want it!” He saw the pure adoration in your eyes as you looked at the ring. His mother smiled before she ruffled your hair.

“One day, it will be yours [name] I’ll make sure of it.” Kazuha’s mother than looked at him, sending the young boy a wink. His face flushed at the thought of marrying you.

“Two house’s ” he heard you say. “And four people”

It was silly how you didn’t count the fathers, but he knew what you meant. Yet you were wrong.

“It’s our houses,” Kazuha said.” And our family.”

If only he could be the one putting the ring on your finger. He could have proposed to you, but he was never given the chance.

So why, even with this piece of himself he left with you why does your heart feel strange?

If he had been with me, he would still be alive.

If he had been with me, he would be mine. He would be alive in this moment. Now, all that was left was a lingering memory that filled you with ache.

If he had been with you, everything would be the way they were meant to be.

[traineecryptid]

NPSS Weibo Q&A (20240831) Part 8

This is a Q&A session held on Weibo. People will tag their questions with the hashtag #南派三叔藏海花在线答疑# (#NPSS Zang Hai Hua Online Q&A#) and NPSS will look through the tag to pick some to answer. The event started at 1500 hours on 2024 August 31st.

Folder with screenshots and big compilation google doc is here. Part 1 is here. Part 2 is here. Part 3 is here. Part 4 is here. Part 5 is here. Part 6 is here. Part 7 is here.

20240902

1233

Why do people say that Tianshou is angsty? #Web Drama Zang Hai Hua# #NPSS explains Tianshou# [Video] 

1508

Q: I want to know if there are two forces of Tianshou, both good and bad sides respectively: Gate guarding Tianshou (good) and Lu God's Tianshou (bad). 

A: You're a little smart.

1509

Q: Shu, if little Zhang Qiling was in a tomb one second and transmigrated into his Yucun self the next second with his feet in the same foot bath as Wu Xie’s, what would his first sentence be?

A: A demon!

1510

Q: I will watch Zang Hai Hua for you… Don’t stop answering, okay…

A: I’m still persevering.

1511

Q: A-Bing, did you know that Zang Hai Hua will stop updating for 3 days? Do you still want your Heat Index or not! (T/N: Heat Index is the ranking/ trending-ness of a drama.)

A: I’m not the boss. It’s not my decision to make!

1537

Q: Hello, Xu-laoshi. Since you said that you won’t be writing “Yucun Biji” anymore (If there’s going to be 9 more Yucun Biji published, then you don’t have to read this post because Yucun Biji is my favorite out of the entire series), can I beg you for an Altay Biji? I wish to see the Iron Triangle’s nomadic life: Menyouping riding a motorcycle to Ürümqi to buy stuff (could also go from a summer ranch to some village). Wu Xie would be in charge of raising cats and dogs and chickens and goats and cows. Pangzi would be in charge of steaming lamb and barbecuing lamb chop. When they don’t want to herd the animals anymore, they can plant sunflowers. Wu Xie can use his architectural talents and build underground houses and learn a few Kazakh words…  

A: I’ve been to Altay. The life there is like the original series and not Yucun.

1540

Q: Laoshi, Sir, Genius Writer, do you know how amazing the Flowery Night you wrote is? How did you do it? Are you Team Experience or Team Imagination? Has a beautiful god descended in the middle of the night and kissed the keyboard you wrote Flowery Night on?

A: Those who understand Flowery Night are experts.

1553 Q: I just took a nap and Shu got online. With the drama updates on hold for three days, will you chat with us for three days?

A: On and off, I guess. I’m deathly busy. I want to cry.

1554

Q: Sanshu, Sanshu, what is the one thing that Xie Yuchen and Hei Xiazi did that angered the other the most? Please tell me.

A: That would be enough for ten books.

1858

Q: Would there be one day where the Iron Triangle gets poisoned after eating some unknown mushrooms?

A: It would if Xiaoge isn’t around.

1858

Q: Shu, would there be updates for Queen’s Banquet? Approximately when would the updates start? Wu Xie is about to go moldy being stuck in that hole.

A: Soon. I need to pick a good desk.

1900

Q: Sanshu, Sanshu, does Wu Xie have any children appropriate de-stressing methods? The kind that can be broadcasted.

A: Standing in the rain?

20240903

0509

Q: The cat didn’t survive but if the cat did survive, would Xiaohua keep it? Or would he give it to Xiazi to raise?

A: Xiaohua wouldn’t interfere with the cat’s karma.

0510

Q: Shu, I really went to Louwailou to eat their West Lake Vinegar Fish during 817. The taste was unforgettable… The restaurant was full of Daomis. Do you have anything you would like to say to the Daomis who have been violently beaten up by the Vinegar Fish?

A: I’ve heard that every fish that was made into a Vinegar Fish has died in vain?

1259

Q: No updates for three days, you could say that this is a version of Three Days in Silence.

A: You sure know how to meme…

and here's part two if today's double update! we've caught up to 3rd September now! hooray! and this is 120 posts (less than 120 questions)... theres... an amount to go... but! whittling! making progress! yay!

[swagatron9]

Im doing my first pregnancy so could u please do a pregnancy story , u dont have to if you dont want to. I really would appreciate if you could because the father refuses to claim her . If you aren’t comfortable with doing pregnancy stuff that is totally okay !! And if you are could you please do brahms , billy lenz oe rz! Michael myers ?

Brahms and Michael and Their Pregnant S/O

Pairings: Brahms Heelshire, Michael Myers

Authors Note: Congradulations on the pregnancy, this is such a beautiful moment (if that’s what you want of course) I wasn't entirely sure how you wanted me to write this, whether it be happy or sad, but I hope you enjoy this nonetheless. I don't write Billy Lenz or any particular Michael Myers; sorry about that. I also have never written a pregnancy story, so sorry if this is bad or at any point incorrect.

Brahms Heelshire:

When you told Brahms about you being pregnant, he would definitely be jealous of the idea of someone else stealing your attention.

He would sulk whenever you were around and would probably hide in the walls to ignore you in order to make a point.

It took you a while, but you managed to get Brahms to sit down and have a conversation with him about what was going to happen.

Afterwards, Brahms would be a bit awkward around you and would probably still continue to avoid you until he gets used to the idea.

Would make you take extra care of him so he can feel loved still. Example: kiss goodnight every night, read his favourite book at least once a week, an extra few bjs here and there.

He eventually will grow to like the idea of a miniature version, that you two conceived, running around.

“Can we still have secks?” If he’s cumming it’s inside, no spillage.

Now, Brahms when the baby is born. He’s awkward, refuses to hold it, and refuses to be anywhere near it.

In all honesty, Brahms is scared of parenthood. He missed out on his entire childhood as well as becoming an actual adult. He lacks the responsibility that most adults have and he’s scared that he’ll be a bad role model for the child. He’s also worried that the child would end up like him and he doesn’t want that.

I imagine that Brahms would be a great friend for the child, maybe not a good dad. He would play with the child, read to it, and express the kind of love that he wished to receive from his own parents.

He would ask you to teach him things to teach the child.

Michael Myers:

I think Michael would hate having a kid around, but also love it at the same time.

He would probably try and train it to be like him or something.

Why can I kind of see Michael have some sort of pregnancy fetish. Like he likes the idea of fucking you with a round swollen stomach, and while it means that he has to be softer and more caring during your intimate times, he also finds himself getting off quicker.

This also means he can cum inside you as much as he wants without a care in the world. He also enjoys how your constantly horny 24/7, so unless your whining about wanting him deep inside you he doesn’t really care.

I just feel like Michael would enjoy the pregnancy stage but despise the baby part because that means he has more responsibilities, but with that being said he would also make you do everything because he doesn’t want to hurt the baby.

New founding possessiveness from Michael, you can now never leave the house under any circumstances, oh the food? Don’t worry, he’ll steal from the next person he pays a visit to.

You wouldn’t ever have to worry about feeling unsafe for you or your child as he is your personal bodyguard as you already know and now I’m not saying he would sacrifice the baby for you, but if it comes down to it he’s going to choose you in a situation where it’s one or the other.

Don’t expect him to care about or for the baby because for the most part he won’t, but he would never do anything on purpose to put it in harms way.

[kiwi2229]

My boyfriend

(James Potter / Regulus Black | 737 words)

For @jegulus-microfic prompt: kitchen

James is more nervous than he expected. He could postpone it, but he doesn’t want to. Not really. He just wants to have it over as soon as possible. His father is at work so it’s the ideal time to talk to his mum. He always knew she will be the first to tell.

As predicted Effie is in the kitchen preparing lunch. He stops before the door to take a deep breath. He wished Regulus would be here with him. The boy offered, but James refused. He has to do it alone. But he still would appreciate his touch right now. It always calms him.

His mum is mixing dough in a big bowl, her back turned to the entrance so she doesn’t notice her son at first. “Mum?” James calls for attention and he goes to stand next to her leaning against the kitchen counter.

“Jamie, here you are!” His mum smiles at him. Everybody always tells him he looks like his father, except for a smile. He has his mothers. “I’m making the apple pie you love so much.”

James gives her a tight smile trying to calm his nerves down. “That’s great. Ehmm, mum? Can I talk to you about something?”

Effie doesn’t look at him as she nods encouraging him. Before James can say anything, she looks at the recipe. “Oh, can you pass me the sugar?”

Sugar. Okay. He can get sugar. It’s fine. James walks across the kitchen to get the sugar. He places it next to the bowl in silence. “Thank you, honey. So, what was it you wanted to tell me?”

James opens his mouth but hesitates. He is pretty sure his mum will be alright with him. She always told him that all she wants is for him to be happy. And he is. Effie stops what she is doing to look at her son. “Oh, it’s serious. Sorry, hold on.”

She wipes her hands with the kitchen towel and turns towards James to give him full attention. “I’m listening.” James can see the worry form in her eyes. Right, staling will only make it worse.

“I met someone,” James says because it’s the easiest way to start. And honestly, Regulus is all he can think about these days.

“Really? That’s great, James!” Effie smiles and James prays he won’t disappoint her.

“It is. I’m really happy Mum. He makes me happy.” James says and holds his breath. It takes a second before the meaning of his words reaches his mother.

“So, you are dating a boy?” Effie asks carefully and James just nods not sure what his mom is thinking. When she doesn’t say anything else James’ nerves cracks and he says all in a breath.

“Yeah, I’m. I found out that I like boys too. So… ehm... I... boys too so that means I still also like girls. But well, I just don’t care about the gender, and he is really great. And…” James cuts out because he doesn’t know what else to say.

“Honey,” Effie says softly. “Thanks for telling me. You know I love you and want you to be happy.”

And James breathes out in relief. He really needed to hear this. He was almost certain his mum won’t mind. But the almost was killing him. And hearing her say that she still loves him the same. He can feel the tears fighting their way into his eyes.

“Come here,” Effies says and wraps him into a tight hug. James goes pliant in her arms grateful for his family. He receives a kiss on his head before Effie slightly leans away. “So, do you want to tell me about him?”

James quickly wipes his eyes. “Yeah, he… mum he is so great. His name is Regulus, like the star and he’s so smart and reads all these books. Honestly, I probably never saw him without a book. And talented. You have to hear him play the piano. He is so good. And also, so handsome.” James reaches out for his phone to show a photo of him and Regulus.

“Does he treat you right?” Effie asks.

“He does.” James looks at his mum from the phone to see her smiling at him. “I can be just me with him and it’s enough. He makes me feel I’m enough.” Effie wraps him in her arms again.

“We should invite him for lunch soon.”

[unreliablesnake]

It won’t work (Joel Miller x reader — one-sided)

Summary: Joel hates you. Or so you thought.

Note: That first kiss scene in Red, white & royal blue hit me hard. No happy ending. Yet.

Joel hated you and he didn’t make it a secret.

But that was okay, you weren’t there to make friends with him. Maria often told you he disliked the older Miller as well, and she only tolerated him because she truly loved his brother. You were friends with Tommy as well, but there was no way in hell you would ever be friendly with Joel, the very man who threw cleverly disguised insults at you whenever he had the chance.

“Man, I’m bored,” Ellie complained as she and Sarah joined you in the living room with some lemonade.

“Then grab a book and read,” Joel offered, earning a disgusted noise from the girl. “I give up.”

“Excellent parenting,” you noted with a scoff. “I have no idea how Sarah ended up the way she did after growing up with you.”

Sarah clearly noticed the tension between you and her father, so she was quick to shake her head with a beaming smile as she sat on an empty chair next to the armchair you were sitting on. “Come on, he’s not that bad. Trust me, he’s a great dad,” she told you softly, throwing a wink in her father’s direction.

“She’s right. He did a decent job despite being a single dad. Sure, I helped a lot, so–” Tommy began, but then he came to an abrupt stop when Maria shot him a look that said ‘stay out of this.’

Joel suddenly shifted in his seat and leaned forward as he watched you. “You sure must know an awful lot about parenting when you don’t even have a child of your own,” he told you, his cold words making you feel nauseous all of a sudden.

That was a low blow. “Well, I’m sorry that I can’t have kids due to some complications following a miscarriage,” you blurted out without thinking. You could see him gulp, his eyes finding the floor more interesting now. “I think I’ll go home now. Maria, Tommy, thank you for inviting me. Girls, it’s been nice to see you.”

Without hesitation you made your way to the front door where you bumped into Bill and Frank who were a little late because of a dinner in a restaurant they had planned weeks ago. They tried to ask you what happened when they saw the tears in your eyes, but you only shook your head in response and walked to your car.

Until today it was only your ex and his and your parents who knew about this. You never told anyone else what had happened to you, and you weren’t planning on doing so. It was something you tried to bury in your mind and heart, hoping one day you could get over it, but it wasn’t as easy as you had thought it would be.

Maria tried to get a hold of you the next day, but you didn’t really feel like talking. She sent you a text to let you know they were heading back to Wyoming, and you broke the radio silence by sending a message to wish them a safe trip. What warmed your heart a little were the messages you received from Sarah who couldn’t stop apologizing for her father’s stupid words.

Two weeks after that evening you went out for a drink with your co-workers, finally having fun as you spent the night trash talking your other colleagues while getting drunker and drunker with each round. Your mood was only worsening when your eyes landed on Joel who was shamelessly staring at you from the bar where he was sitting.

“Okay, why don’t you just go over to him? You’ve been staring at each other for the past ten minutes,” Joanna told you with a wolfish grin.

Matt, her boyfriend, was quick to turn around and check who’s been watching you. “The way he’s staring at you is pretty creepy.”

You shrugged. “I know him. He’s an asshole but otherwise harmless.”

“Then I won’t suggest asking him to join us,” Joanna said with a pout. “Too bad, he’s handsome.”

The fourth member of your little group, who also happened to be the closest to you, gave you an expectant look. “Okay, what’s the story here?” Iris asked.

“Yes, that’s a good question,” Matt said with a nod.

“His oldest daughter, Sarah, moved into the apartment next to mine with her boyfriend. She’s a sweet and cheerful girl, we often talked and we’re kinda friends with her. Then I met her uncle, Tommy, and his wife, Maria, and we became friends. Fast forward to today, when they come here from Wyoming, I’m often invited for dinner or a game night. They need an extra person because they make a team, Joel’s girls make a team, and so Joel needs a teammate for game night too. Joel keeps making his stupid little comments, but I usually don’t make a big deal out of them. I let him bark, it doesn’t matter to me.”

“You’re right, he sounds like an asshole,” Iris noted before taking a swig of her beer.

The Joel topic was closed with that, and soon you agreed to call it a day and go home to sleep. Joanna and Matt offered to share an Uber with you since they went in the same direction, but you wanted to be alone so you declined. The last thing you wanted in your miserable drunk state was being in the company of a happy couple.

Once everyone was gone, you went outside and waited for the car to pick you up. While you waited, you kept browsing your phone, so when you felt a tap on your shoulder, you involuntarily jumped a little. It was Joel, standing next to you with his hands now in the pockets of his jeans.

“You didn’t come over to say hi,” he told you.

“You didn’t either,” you pointed out.

He took a deep breath that he let out really slowly. “True. Why do you hate me so much?”

This was ridiculous. Did he really have the audacity to ask you that? “It’s you who hates me, I’m just keeping my distance. You’re the one who constantly belittles me,” you bursted out. “You’re a fucking asshole, Joel.”

“I don’t hate you,” he quietly said.

When you gave him a questioning look, he just muttered something about how dense you were, then stepped closer to pull you into a kiss. You froze from the surprise, but pushed him away the moment you came to your senses. He looked hurt from your reaction, but you couldn’t care less about his feelings. Joel Miller was a terrible person, there was no way in hell you would ever be attracted to him. Well, sure, he was handsome, but his personality ruined everything.

“What was that all about?” you wondered out loud enough for him to hear.

Joel buried his hand into his hair as he began pacing in front of you. “I didn’t know what to do. I like you, but I don’t want to complicate things with a relationship until Ellie is old enough to move out,” he began to explain, and you had to fight the urge to call him out on this bullshit. “Keeping you at arm’s length was my way of protecting myself.”

“You weren’t keeping me at arm’s length, you hurt me. Several times.”

“I know, and I’m so sorry.” At least he sounded genuine. “Let’s have a fresh start. Let me give you a ride home,” he tried.

Looking down at your phone, you saw that your Uber was nearby. “I already called an Uber, it’s almost here. But thanks.”

Joel nodded. “I’ll leave you alone, then. Goodnight.”

“Goodnight,” you replied, suddenly feeling guilty for being harsh with him. He looked like a kicked puppy, a sight you had never thought you would see. When he reached the door of the bar, you let out a sigh and called after him. “Joel, wait. We can try to be friends. I’m sure Sarah would appreciate it if we could get along.”

“You don’t get it, do you? Being friends isn’t enough. I want to take you out on dates, I want to be able to hold you and kiss you whenever I can. I want all of you,” he explained.

Nodding, you bit on your lower lip and thought about what to say. “I can’t give you that. I’m sorry.”

To your surprise, he leaned over to kiss your forehead. “I’ll have to learn to live with the idea of being nothing more but friends, huh?” he asked, and you nodded. “All right, let’s give it a shot.”

“My Uber’s here. Bye, Joel.”

You got into the car and stared out the window during the whole ride. He kissed you. Joel kissed you and told you he liked you more than just a friend. It was shocking news and you had trouble wrapping your head around it. When you got out of the shower, you were welcomed by a new message on your phone.

Joel: By the way, I’m sorry for saying what I did the other night. I didn’t know.

You: I never told anyone, don’t worry about it.

Joel: I still feel like shit for making you upset. Just saying.

You put down the phone on the nightstand and decided not to respond. After his confession you didn’t know how to act around him and how to talk to him anymore. He wanted more than you could give him, and even though you were curious if that could even work between you, you didn’t want to risk making things worse.

The next morning you were ready to leave for breakfast, but you were stopped by Sarah who looked like she’d been waiting for you to step out of your apartment. Her ever present bright smile made it clear she was in a good mood, but there was a hint of nervousness in her eyes that made you think about what was going on.

“We’re having dinner with Dad and Ellie tonight, I thought you should join us,” she said happily.

“I don’t think that would be a good idea.”

“Is it because of what happened last night?” Your jaw dropped upon hearing this. How in the hell did she know about that? “Dad told Uncle Tommy who called to tell me all about it. Listen, I know it must be weird, but if you spend some time together, you might be able to sort things out. Maybe he would accept that you can’t be more than friends, maybe you’ll realize you want more, too.”

Blowing out the air you didn’t even know you were holding, you thought about what to say. You would be okay with being friends, but knowing Joel, he was only saying he would accept your decision to make sure you didn’t disappear from his life. After about a year of constant malicious comments, it was hard to have a fresh start. You were too drunk to think straight when you said you could try to be friends.

Sarah could see you were unsure. “You don’t want that, right? That’s why you’re hesitating,” she said softly. You nodded. “Too bad, I think you would be great together. But I won’t force you. Have a good day.”

“You too,” you said.

………….

“I tried to talk to her, but it didn't work,” Sarah told her father when she joined him in the kitchen. Her boyfriend was out in the backyard, fixing something to save Joel some time, so she took this time to conspire in secret. “She’s not ready. And let’s be honest, your behavior towards her from the start wasn’t exactly nice.”

Joel rested his forearms on the kitchen island then put his forehead on top of it. “I’m such an idiot. I acted like some stupid kid who pulls the hair of his crush all the time.”

She walked over to him and put a hand on his shoulder in support. “Look, maybe she just needs time. Actually, I have a plan. Why don’t we visit Uncle Tommy and Maria in Wyoming?”

“You think some distance would help?” he asked as he glanced over at her.

“No, I think we should convince her to come with us. I know for a fact that Maria has already invited her a few times, but she never had the time to go. Maybe this time she would agree if Uncle Tommy and Maria helped us.”

Joel straightened up and leaned against the kitchen island. “You think that could work?”

“I don’t know,” she admitted.

“Oh, she would be uncomfortable the whole time,” Ellie spoke up when she appeared out of nowhere. “I had no idea that’s why you were so rude to her.”

“How long have you been eavesdropping?”

“Long enough to know you asked Sarah to act like it was Uncle Tommy who ratted you out to her,” she replied with a shrug.

He let out a frustrated sigh, having enough of this drama of his. Ellie was right, you would be uncomfortable, and knowing how much Maria disliked him, she certainly wouldn’t support him. Tommy would try, but your bond with his wife was stronger.

Suddenly Ellie stepped in front of him with her hands on her hips. “I never said you shouldn’t give it a shot, you know. Maybe a change of scenery is all she needs. Well, if you’re on your best behavior, of course. Treat her nice, buy her something as a gesture, and maybe go on a double date with Uncle Tommy and Maria without telling her it’s a date,” she suggested.

“She’s right,” Sarah noted with a nod.

Joel let out a sigh. “Fine. I’ll talk to Tommy.”

[skzhocomments]

Mafia Book #2 - PART II - The Withered Rose - Chapter 3 - Pure Morning

Story masterlist - please consult it for the summary of the story, trigger warnings etc.

General masterlist

PART I - The Black Iris

---

Wattpad | AO3

Chapter 2 | Chapter 4

---

PART II - The Withered Rose

Chapter 3 - Pure Morning

chapter word count: ~6.2k words

~almost 4 years ago~

~Emilia’s POV~

“You will go out and dig a grave for me… and if he ever asks…” I force the words out of my throat, but speaking about this is hard, and it hurts, and I want nothing more than to run back to Chris once Felix wakes up, and let him apologise and forgive him for everything, but how can I do that?

I can’t.

I can’t do that.

I have to be strong and leave.

I don’t want to leave.

But I can’t stay here anymore.

Will Felix even wake up?

It doesn't matter.

I have to leave.

I look at Jeongin way too pleadingly for my linking. I was never one to plead for anything, but ever since Hyo stabbed me, it feels like all I’ve done was pleading.

For Chris to listen to me.

For Jeongin to dig me a grave.

For everyone else to believe me because they trust me, not because Felix confirms my side of the story.

Actually, everyone else doesn’t even matter. I just wanted Chris to believe me… That would’ve been enough.

But he didn’t.

“… I understand. And I promise you that I will do just as you asked me.” Jeongin looks back at me with focused determination in his sharp eyes, that now have a burning in them I haven’t noticed before.

“Thank you, Innie. Truly. You’re the only one I can still trust.”

“Emi… how about this? We’ll wait for a few more days until you are a bit better, you lost so much blood… and after that, let’s leave this shithole behind, together. Let’s run far away for good.” He says with resolution and grabs my face, “I’ll make you forget all about him.”, then presses his lips against mine.

I let him kiss me.

Why not?

He’s gonna be heartbroken enough anyway once I leave.

Let this be… the last time we see each other, Innie.

“Where should we go once you feel better, hm?” He smiles and caresses my cheek, and it’s all so unfair to me and especially to him.

Why couldn’t it be you, Innie?

Why does my heart ache so bad after the man who trampled over it like it was nothing?

“I don’t know. Somewhere far, far away from here.”

“That goes without saying.” He chuckles and grabs my left hand, squeezing it tightly. “I’ve already brought some money. Not much, since I feel Minho’s eyes are still on me, but I’ll keep bringing some more little by little for the next week and then we can make some fake passports. I know a guy.”

“Great.” I smile and squeeze his hand back in return.

“I don’t know if I can come every day, but I’ll try. If you’re hungry, you can call the front desk anytime. The owner is an old friend of mine.”

So, you’re having your eyes on me?

“Got it.”

“You probably won’t have a 5-course meal at this shitty motel but hey, it’s better than nothing.”

“It’s fine, Innie, really. I’ll be okay even if you’re not here.” I smile assuringly, but it only makes Jeongin frown harder.

“Be careful when you stand up. The stitches might split apart if you’re not careful enough. If that happens, make sure you put on a clean bandage and call reception immediately to tell my friend to reach out to me, okay?”

“Yes, Innie. Don’t worry. I’ve been hurt before.”

“I just… please just take it easy, Emilia. I don’t want anything to happen to you. God knows you’ve been through enough already.” As he says this, he moves his hands back on my cheeks and grazes them with his thumbs again. “Your complexion looks pretty good.”

“Thanks to you.” I chuckle.

“I wish I could stay here longer…”

“The others will get suspicious if you’re away for too long, won’t they?”

“Mhm. Probably.”

“Thank you for everything, Jeongin.” I say sincerely. When I told him so many months ago that he can repay the favour when the time comes, I hoped the time would never come.

And yet, it did, and he saved my life, and I don’t know if I should be grateful or upset about it. I don’t feel like wanting to be alive right now, but no matter what I’ve been through, my urge to live has always been strong. It’s always been like a survival instinct. Like that last bit of pointless struggle that fights with your will to die when you hang yourself or keep your head underwater for long enough to let your lungs fill with liquid.

Your brain knows you want to die, but your instincts just don’t let you. You still struggle and wiggle your hands desperately. How laughable this is. I am the same way.

He just nods and stands up, making his way towards the door.

“I’ll see you soon, okay?”

I nod back with a smile, and I hate myself for lying to him, but I don’t want to be selfish and take advantage just to use him. He deserves way better than that. Way more than someone who can’t love him back the way he wants.

Jeongin doesn’t say goodbye, and I don’t say it either. This fits us, parting our ways unexpectedly, just as we met in that mansion so many years ago.

After he leaves, I make sure to call reception and request some food. If I want to get out of here without anyone knowing, I need to make it obvious enough that I’m not planning on going anywhere, so as soon as the dude brings me food (consisting of a sad looking sandwich that I barely manage to swallow), I start chit-chatting with him.

I complain about how badly my abdomen hurts, he tells me how much of a hassle it was when Jeongin brought me covered in blood a few days ago. I tell him I can barely get out of bed, and he sympathises.

The bread is dry and the ham in it has a weird flavour.

We continue talking while I eat the sandwich and then I hand him back the plate. It’s chipped around the margins, and I think that says a lot about the man in front of me as well, but I don’t dwell on it. I am happy enough to have completed my achievement, which consisted in making this dude believe I am unable to get up without struggling.

He wouldn’t be wrong; he just doesn’t know that I’m persistent enough to push myself no matter how much it hurts.

I thank the man for the food and let him know that I’m planning to go to sleep and rest some more until tomorrow, and he wishes me a speedy recovery.

All according to plan.

~

A few hours later, I reluctantly get out of bed and the pain in my lower stomach is so bad, I feel like I might pass out.

Jeongin left some painkillers on the table, so I grab a fistful and drown myself in them, hoping it would at least make this pain a bit more bearable. I grab a piece of paper from the little notebook in the room and scribble down a pointless apology to Jeongin with my red lipstick. When the note is written, I put the lipstick in my pocket, next to the picture of San I took from my old home and next to the golden greenhouse key I should’ve returned to Hyunjin after finishing the mission.

It's horrible, really, how I hold onto these items of my past life. It suddenly occurs to me that besides the golden key, there’s nothing else from the moments with Stray Kids I can put in my pocket; no pictures to help me reminisce about the good times with them. The only thing I have is heartbreak and a painful wound, proof only of aching memories.

The wind gushing outside is quite strong, I notice, as I open the window to observe my surroundings. Thankfully I’m on the ground floor and it’s easy enough to jump out, carrying the small bag of cash Jeongin left. I’m pleasantly surprised to find a gun and some bullets inside as well, so I take it out and place it steadily in my pocket, and walk away from the motel, praying that no one saw me.

Fuck, this place really is in the middle of nowhere.

I want to curse out loud, but I keep silent and make my way towards the road as quietly as I can. It’s hard to walk, and I fear my stitches have torn from the small jump, but still, I push forward and just focus on putting one leg in front of the other.

Yes, that’s it. Right foot. Left foot. Right foot. Left foot.

No cars come.

Right foot. Left foot. Right foot.

There’s a faint light ahead.

Left foot. Right foot. Left foot.

Is that a car?

I raise my hand in the air and signal that I want to hitchhike, and thankfully, the car stops. A woman rolls down her window and looks at me, concern in her eyes.

She seems innocent.

“Oh my God, are you okay? Why are you here?”

“Hello! God, I’m so happy someone stopped!” I put on my best act and start sobbing. “I had no idea what to do! I had a fight with my boyfriend and he dropped me here! I don’t even know where I am! I’ve been walking for hours!”

“No way! In the middle of the night?!”

“Yes! That prick!”

“Oh my God, I can’t believe it!” She exclaims. “Where do you wanna go?”

“I’m going back to my parents, fuck that bastard!”

“Yeah, girl! That’s the attitude! Where do they live?”

I vaguely tell her a city’s name that must be hundreds of kilometres away, and she urges me to come in her car. She doesn’t seem to pay any mind to my bag, and I’m glad she doesn’t ask what’s in it.

Oh, you know, just a million dollars. I think how the conversation would play out, but refrain from laughing at the absurdity.

She also tells me where she’s headed, and apologises that she can’t drop me off that far away, but we’ll definitely find a bus stop or train station in the next city over, ‘that’s like, just two-three hours ahead’, as per her words.

I sit in the back, carefully watching the woman’s every move. She is talkative and naïve, but I no longer trust anyone and am not sure if her intentions are pure or if she will try and rob me the first chance she gets, so I keep my hand in my pocket, on my gun, and hang onto the bag to dear life.

It’s all I’ve got.

~

About two hours later, the woman stops the car at a gas station. I’m still quite far from where I want to go, but thank her anyway for getting me as close as she could.

She insists she could still drop me off directly at a bus stop, but I’m just thankful I didn’t have to use the gun, so I simply shake my head and tell her that I’ve got it.

The wound hurts.

Perhaps it would’ve been easier to steal her car or threaten her to drive further away, or even accept her offer of dropping me off in the city instead of on the outskirts, but I can’t risk the police finding out about any of this, so I just smile politely, thank her again, and start walking.

Ugh.

This is so hard.

Right foot. Left foot. Right foot. Left foot.

I’m able to find a bus stop quite easily, which I take until the train station, where I buy a ticket to the only city I can go to, the only place far enough from all this mafia bullshit, where I know somebody who might just help me after a bit of convincing.

I arrive about 7 hours later and hop off the train. The first light of dawn is breaking as I keep going and going and going.

Right foot. Left foot.

The pain is back stronger than ever, as well as a numbing fever, and each time I place my hand on my lower stomach, it hurts worse.

Right foot. Left foot. Right foot. Left foot

I’m cold.

Fuck.

Is this blood?

Am I bleeding?

I put my hand on my bandage again and it feels wet, but it’s still too dark out to see anything.

After some more walking, I reach a forest and walk clumsily in it, over the fallen branches. Leaves are crunching under my weight, and it’s getting harder and harder to see, even if the dawn is breaking.

Right foot. Left foot. Right foot. Left foot. Right foot. Left foot. Right foot.

Please be here.

Please still be here.

Please.

I walk, and walk, and walk, and I feel sick, and just when I think I can’t walk anymore, I finally see it: a small, familiar wooden cottage with its porch light lit up.

I go up the stairs and knock on the door, and after a few knocks, someone answers.

“Shade?” He asks unimpressed.

“Wooyoung. You have no idea how glad I am to see you.” I say, truly relieved. I’ve been betting everything on him being here, and he is.

Thank heavens he’s here.

“I thought you were dead.” He replies, his brows furrowed.

“Yeah, well, I’m not. Surprise!” I counter weakly. He doesn't seem happy to see me.

“And to think I celebrated for nothing. What the fuck are you doing here?” He hisses.

“I know you probably don’t want to see me, but-”

“Probably?” He scoffs. “Definitely. Leave.”

“Wooyung, please-”

“I said leave. I never want to see you again, you bitch.” He curses.

“I’m bleeding. I need your help. Please.”

Here I am, pleading again.

“You’re better off dead. You can die for all I care. That’s what you deserve after abandoning San in that building. Fucking-” He spits out, and with that, he shuts the door in my face.

Defeated, I simply sit down on the porch. I can’t move anymore. It hurts too badly, and I ran out of pills a few many kilometres ago.

It’s almost morning now, and the light filters beautifully through the trees, sun rays piercing through the branches devoid of leaves in this cold end of winter.

At least it’s beautiful.

“You would’ve liked this.” I whisper weakly, taking out San’s picture out of my pocket. We look so happy in it, it’s sick and twisted that he is no more, and I’m dying on his best friend’s porch. “Wooyoung is right to hate me, but… I also wanted you to live. If only you told me where you were at that time… we could’ve lived together somewhere, or who knows… die together, at least.”

Tears prick my eyes as all the remaining energy I had leaves my body.

It hurts…

All of a sudden, Wooyoung opens the door forcefully and steps towards me in anger.

“You pathetic bitch. Look at you hugging that picture. Are you planning to die here? Be an even bigger inconvenience to me? Do you know how hard it is to dig a grave? And you might stain my porch with your dirty blood.”

I chuckle. This is so like him.

“Come inside.”

“I can’t… stand up… anymore…”

“Lazy.” He rolls his eyes and bends down, helping me up.

His house is warm, the vague smell of fire lingering in the air.

“There you go.” He says with a sigh, helping me in a chair. “Let me just put something on the sofa, I don’t want you to get it dirty. Blood is hard to get rid of.”

“You know it.” I wink.

“Keep a hand on your abdomen. What the fuck happened to you?”

“I got stabbed, then someone stitched it, but I jumped from a window, and I think it’s all ripped now.”

“You’re pretty dumb.” He chuckles then comes back to me to put me on the sofa. I lay down and raise my blood-stained blouse, and Wooyoung examines the wound.

“No, not dumb, just cautious. Someone’s out to get me.”

“Poor stitches… they look pretty. Whoever did them knows what they’re doing.” He observes carefully.

“Yeah. Shit-” I hiss in pain when he starts applying disinfectant.

“Don’t be such a pussy, you’ve had worse.”

“Not my fault it hurts like hell- fucking-” I curse again when the needle pierces my skin. The burning is so bad, I feel like passing out.

“Stop whining.”

“Give me something for the pain, anything!”

“Oh my God, Shade, fucking calm down. Did you take anything?”

“Yeah, about a bottle of painkillers. Not sure what it was, but it did the trick.”

“A bottle?! Hell no, I’m not giving you anything else, you addict.”

“Then distract me somehow, you know better, you’re the doctor- FUCK”

“Oh hell, are you seriously crying? That’s a new one!”

“It really hurts, asshole!”

“Maybe I should’ve let you die after all. Less of a hassle than dealing with your screaming.” He rolls his eyes. “So, who’s out to get you?”

“Stray Kids.” I say, and he stops and looks at me.

“Seriously?!”

“No, I’m just messing with you.”

“Oh, okay, that’s good-”

“I’m not. It’s true. Their boss is my ex-lover, and he wants to kill me because he thinks I shot one of the other members.”

“Shade! Why the fuck did you come here, then? You know I barely got away after San died! Now you’re coming here to bring me trouble?!”

“No, fuck, I’m going to leave, I promise. I came here because you’re the only doctor I know, and I was dying. No one will even know I’m here! They hopefully think I’m dead!”

“What is it with you and pretending to die? I thought Stray Kids killed you years ago when Boss gave you that mission.”

“They offered me a deal – joining hands with them to kill our Boss and then freedom.”

“Look how much freedom you have-” He chuckles. “- running away. Did Boss die?”

“I don’t even know for sure… I think so. But wait, you left so long ago, how did you know I was dead?”

“I keep in touch with some of the others sometimes…”

“You Ateez people have always been risk takers.” I say, and Wooyoung chuckles.

“They’re my brothers after all. The ones that are left.”

“If Boss really died, you could reunite and-”

“No.” He shakes his head. “All of them have already left and are scattered all throughout the world. No one wants to come back.”

“Really? Wow. That’s…”

“I’m the only one left here. I wanted to leave too, but I quite enjoy the cabin life.”

“You cottage core whore.” I say, and he bursts out laughing.

“There, you’re all done. For the next few days, you have to eat a lot of meat and vegetables. Bye!”

“Bye? Hell no, I’m staying here. Take care of me.”

“You’re not staying here. What if Stray Kids finds us?! They’re gonna kill both of us.”

“I told you, they won’t find us! And even if they somehow would, they’d only kill me. They never go for innocent people.”

“Yeah, because I’m sooooo innocent. What a joke.” He laughs drily.

“You are, look at your princess face.”

“Shade, I’m serious.”

“I’m serious too. Nurse me back to health and then I’ll be gone and we’re never going to see each other again, okay?”

I ask, but he doesn’t say anything in return.

“Please.” I insist.

“… fine. But only until you’re better. Then you walk out that door, and we’re done.”

“Promise.”

~

Days with Wooyoung are really tranquil. Despite his apprehension regarding Stray Kids and the aversion he had towards me in the beginning, he is now quite friendly. We spend a lot of time chatting, and he is mostly curious about my time with SKZ.

I answer all of his questions, because there’s no point in hiding anything anymore. Not from Wooyoung, one of the only two people I still trust in the world.

Unfortunately, I had to leave the other one thousands of kilometres behind because he is in love with me. Such is life.

Wooyoung takes good care of me. He feeds me and checks on the wound as often as he needs to, and the day when he needs to remove the stitches approaches quickly.

“So, where do you plan to go next?” He asks as he clips each thread.

“Hmm, I don’t know. Do you know anyone who makes fake passports?”

“Yeah, she lives a couple of cities over. How much money do you have?”

“Enough, probably. I’ll manage. Don’t know how to smuggle it to another country, though.”

“The girl also makes credit cards and statements to make it look genuine. Damn Shade, I fed you too well the past few weeks, haven’t I?”

“Why?”

“Your stomach got a bit rounder. You owe me some money for giving you all this food.”

“Don’t be ridiculous.” I roll my eyes at him. “So, when will you take me to the passport girl?”

“She’s usually only working on Sundays, so we could go see her a week from now, and the passport and card should take about… a few weeks? A month, maybe?”

~

“Old face!” The girl grins behind the desk. “And a new bird. Welcome, welcome, how may I help you on this beautiful day?” She asks cheerfully, and I can’t help but glance out the window, to the merciless rain.

“Hi Dahyun. We need passports and some cards.”

“Straight to the point, as usual! Come on Wooyoung, we’ve been friends for a long time. Who’s she, by the way?”

“She is Shade.” I intervene, a bit annoyed that she didn’t address me directly.

“Shade? Hmm… where did I hear this name?” She contemplates for a second. “Were you in Scarlet Rose?”

“Yup.”

“I swear I heard you died. Oh, well, you’re as dead as I am, I guess.” She shrugs and laughs loudly. I smile back.

“Anyway, Dahyun. How much will it take for you to make us some passports and credit cards?”

“Hmm… I’m actually swamped with work, believe it or not, so I think… the earliest would be in about two months from now.”

“Two months?!” Wooyoung’s mouth almost falls to the floor. “You used to do them in less than two weeks, what happened?”

“One of my men got caught and it really slowed down the process.” She sighs. “Say, don’t you two wanna come work for me?”

“No way.” Wooyoung shakes his head and Dahyun starts laughing.

“I thought so. Then, two months? Is that okay?”

“Yeah, that works.”

“For both of you?”

“Yes. And don’t forget about the cards.” Wooyoung replies and I instantly turn my head to look at him. He avoids my gaze.

“That’s gonna be 50k. 25k up front, 25k at delivery. Deal?”

“Deal.”

~

“Why do you need a fake passport and a card?” I raise my brow questioningly, but Wooyoung just shrugs.

“Better be prepared just in case. Besides, it wouldn’t hurt to visit my friends from time to time.”

“That’s true. But two months? Ugh, I guess we’re stuck together for a bit longer.”

“Lucky me.” Wooyoung chuckles.

“Do we have some lemons or something at home?”

“Haven’t gone to the store yet, but there might still be one or two left. Why?”

“I don’t know, I feel really nauseous all of a sudden.”

“You might be car sick.”

“You think?”

“Dahyun’s office is quite far away.”

“Even so, I’ve never been car sick before.”

“Who knows, maybe you didn’t sleep well or ate something bad.”

~

The nausea continued for the next couple of days, reaching its peak with frequent vomiting. It got to a point where it was so bad, even the smell of food cooked by Wooyoung made me rush to the bathroom and empty my bowels.

“I don’t get it.” I whine from the sofa loudly. “Why am I so sick? Are you poisoning me?”

“Don’t be ridiculous. I would’ve given you a high enough dose to kill you since day one if that was the case.”

“True.” I lay my head down on one of the cushions and try to distract my mind from the queasiness.

“Any chance you might be pregnant?” Wooyoung asks, and I feel the whole world stop.

“Don’t even joke about that.” I reply after a few too many seconds of silence.

“I’m not joking… but the symptoms match up…” He says quietly, and I stand up.

“No way. No.” I shake my head. “I’ve been on birth control for as long as I can remember.”

“What birth control? Pills?”

“Yeah.”

“You said it yourself; you’ve been really stressed the past few weeks before your last mission… what if you… missed a day, or a few?”

“N-no.” I shake my head unsure. Wooyoung is right, it was a stressful time with days full of training and plans and nights full of Chris, and we’ve never used condoms, but-

“When did you last have your period?”

Huh?

I tried to think about it, but I couldn’t remember. I just shake my head.

“I’m going shopping tomorrow, so I’ll grab a few tests, just to check. If it’s not that, I’m taking you for some bloodwork to see what the heck is wrong with you.”

“Mhm. Okay. That sounds good.”

I wait impatiently for the day to be over, and I barely get any sleep during the night. When morning finally comes, I anxiously watch Wooyoung grab his coat and drive away in his truck, and I fidget the whole time he’s gone.

What if I’m really pregnant?

Should I get an abortion?

Do I keep it?

Fuck, I won’t be a good mom. I can’t… I can’t be a mom.

I keep fidgeting nervously, trying to pierce my memories back together. Did I really miss taking the pills?

I might have.

I barely remember the few days before the mission.

The anxiety bubbling in my stomach makes me more nauseous, and I find myself hunched against the toilet three times before Wooyoung comes back.

As soon as I hear his truck driving next to the house, my eyes stay stuck on the front door. It feels like he’s moving excruciatingly slow.

“Yo, I’m back.” He waves as he watches me.

“What took you so long?” I snap at him, and he sighs.

“Sorry, there was a bit of traffic…”

“No… I just… fuck.” I keep looking down at my feet and try to summon more words. “Did you get the- uhm, how was your shopping trip?” I ask and force out a smile, which is nearly impossible. I don’t want to show how anxious I am, but I must be trembling, because Wooyoung soon comes and places his hands on top of mine in a comforting manner.

“Yes, I got you a couple of tests. Calm down and go take one.”

I yank my hands back and rummage through the shopping bags on the floor to find the box containing the holy grail, and I run straight to the toilet.

The few minutes until I’m supposed to look at the test pass agonisingly slowly, and I even throw up again from anxiety. Again.

When I finally look at the test, I want to gauge my eyes out.

Two red lines are staring back at me.

How?

How did this happen?

I throw the test away in the bin and I hug myself.

Certainly, I’ve seen it wrong.

Yes. It was just a line, and I’ve been so anxious I’ve seen two.

I get up and open the trash can, grabbing the test. Looking at it again, it’s quite obvious that I’ve read it right the first time around.

Sure enough, it displays two red lines, which means…

“Shade, are you okay in there?” Wooyoung knocks on the door, making me jolt. “Did you take the test?”

I stand up and open the door, and as soon as he sees me, Wooyoung’s expression falls. He shakes his head.

“Really?” he whispers, and I burst out crying.

I haven’t cried since the night Chris slapped me, so the moment I feel the first tears in the corners of my eyes, I can’t stop them from falling anymore.

Wooyoung hugs me tightly and I’m grateful he’s not his usual self that would mock me for getting in this situation. He shows me a compassionate side I haven’t seen since San was alive, and that makes me cry even more.

“Shh, it’s gonna be alright.”

“How? How is it going to be alright, hm?! Not only have I been running away from him, now I have to hide a baby as well?!”

“You’re strong.”

“No, I’m not.”

“Yes, you are. You’re strong. Look at you, surviving two cold-blooded mafia bosses that have been hunting you down for years. You can do anything.”

I just hug him tighter and try not to think for a little while. When I’m done crying, I go to sleep, and when I wake up, Wooyoung and I talk about something else.

~

Time passes, and we don’t mention the pregnancy at all, besides the times when Wooyoung takes me to the doctor to get checked up. With every passing day, I get more and more used to the idea of having a baby. I even get excited when it starts kicking, and Wooyoung shares my excitement.

Eventually, two months go by and Wooyoung leaves to pick up the passports and cards from Dahyun. I choose not to go with him, as I’m still experiencing some morning sickness. I just watch TV and pet my belly, which seems to grow bigger and bigger with every week.

I’m feeling happy and safe, but as always, the tranquillity has to be interrupted by something.

It always goes like this. Whenever I allow myself to feel relaxed, something happens. I always make the mistake of getting used to the calm before the storm, and the thunder always takes me by surprise when it inevitably comes.

The thunder this time was brought by Wooyoung running into the house quickly, as if stressed out.

“Hey, you’re back?” I ask, concerned.

“Yes. We need to pack. Now.”

“What?” I look at him with confusion. “Why?”

“They’re here for you, fuck.” He says while rummaging through a closet and pulling out big bags.

“Who?”

“I don’t know, Shade! Possibly Stray Kids! Dahyun told me someone’s asked for you because he fucking saw you on a security camera going into her office. Fuck!”

“How… how could this be?!”

“Right?! The fucker must’ve looked through HUNDREDS OF THOUSANDS of hours of footage to find you there!”

“Did Dahyun tell him anything…?”

“No, but she’s been threatened by that dude, so she’s making arrangements to leave as we speak. We need to go.”

“Where would we even go?”

“Somewhere… as far away as possible. Fucking hell. Where do we go?”

“… Italy?! They have a lot of remote towns… But wait… we?” I ask, and he pauses.

I watch as he opens and closes his mouth a few times, but as no words come out, I decide to speak again.

“Are you coming with me?”

“… yes.”

“Okay.”

“Okay?”

“Okay. But… why? I thought you wanted to get rid of me.” I whisper, and he quickly glances at me, and then at my stomach.

“It’s not you… don’t get me wrong, I don’t give two shits about you, but… The baby.”

“The baby?”

“Mhm.”

“Okay.” I nod. “Let’s pack.”

~

~Present day~

“So, someone found you there… but who?” Minho asks deep in thought.

“I don’t know. We assumed it was Stray Kids. I thought you guys found out that Jeongin lied and that you came for me. Fuck, I’ve even lived my life fearing the day you’d come for my head.” I say and Minho pauses temporarily.

“No one except Jeongin knew you were alive. Was it him?” He tilts his head and I shrug.

“I don’t know… maybe. But why… why would he try to find me?”

“Maybe he’s still in love with you. Love makes you do crazy things.”

“But if Chris were to find out… what would he even do?” I ask, almost in a whisper, and then instantly regret it. I shouldn’t be thinking about Chris again.

“I don’t even know …”

“Anyway, Wooyoung and I both moved to Italy and that’s how I ended up here.”

“Fucking hell…” Minho replies.

“I hope you understand why I can’t come back with you, Minho. I’m sorry.”

“No, Emilia, I’m the one who’s sorry. I know you probably hate Chris. Hell, you probably hate me, and everyone else, but-”

“Yes, you’re right. I fucking loathe all of you.”

“Some tea?” Wooyoung comes into the room with another tray full of teacups.

“What, are you some sort of fucking housewife?” I mock, and he gives me a look.

“You and that rotten mouth of yours. What if Ivy hears you?”

“Iris, you’re awake!” Minho suddenly sits up from his chair and runs up to his wife. “How are you feeling?”

“I’m fine… my head hurts a bit… what happened?”

“Emilia hit you.” He sighs.

“Sorry ‘bout that!” I chuckle slightly and raise my teacup in the air.

“Wait, Emilia, as in-”

“Chan’s lover.” Minho clarifies, and I cringe.

“Am I that popular? Nice to meet you, Minho’s wife.”

“I have a name.” The woman stands up and comes to me, handing her hand out for a shake. “Iris.”

“Emilia, but oh well, you know that already.”

“I do. So, this is where you were hiding.”

What?

I feel everything around me freeze, and I look at Minho, whose gaze dropped as well.

“What do you mean?” I ask quietly.

“I mean – I was really wondering where you were, after I found out that the pretty grave Jeongin dug for you is empty.”

“Iris… what are you talking about?” Minho asks, as if hoping he heard his wife wrong. “Did you… know about this?”

“I found out when we left for Italy and was planning to tell you about this as soon as our honeymoon was over-”

“Are you fucking kidding me? Fuck the honeymoon, this is the type of shit you should be telling me about immediately.”

“Did Jeongin tell you?” I stand up as well and ask in a whisper. “Does… does Chris also know?”

My words are suffocating me. Faced with the prospect that Chris could actually know about me being alive makes me as anxious as I was when I first heard Minho’s voice earlier.

Fuck.

I’m scared.

“No. He’s kept your secret, no matter how much it fucked him up.”

“Don’t you dare judge me for it. It was a life and death decision for me, and you would’ve done the same thing given the circumstances. Chris can’t know about this. He can’t. I can’t see him. I don’t want to-”

“Emilia, calm down.” Wooyoung puts his hands on my shoulders, making me sit back down, and I try to breathe in for a second.

It’s hard.

It’s hard to breathe, and the room is spinning.

“How the fuck can I be calm, Wooyoung?! If Chan finds out-”

“He’ll come for you.” Iris cuts me off, and I look at her surprised.

What did she just say?

How much… does she know?

“No. He can’t. Minho, please-”

“I’m sorry, Emilia, but ever since you died, Chris has been a fucking mess…” Minho starts. “You’re the only one who can make him be… his old self.”

“Fuck that. Fuck Chris. Fuck YOU!”

“You have to come back with us.”

“No. Not in a million years. I will never come back.”

“You have his child.” Iris insists. It’s hard to contain my laugh when she’s being so cynical.

“So what? Does he deserve a chance at parenting? Ivy baby, look, this is your daddy. He almost killed mommy and he stepped on her heart repeatedly, but that’s okay, because he feels bad about it!”

“I’m sorry, but it’s just the way it will be.”

“Fuck your fake-ass compassion.” I laugh again, and when I look at Minho, I notice that he’s pointing his gun at me again. “Are you seriously threatening me right now? After ruining everything? I can’t believe you two.”

“I don’t want to threaten you. We were the ones who were wrong. But if you don’t come back willingly… You leave me no choice.”

“So, shoot me, then! Fucking shoot me and end this already, Minho! I’m not coming with you!”

“No… I won’t take you with us if you don’t want it, Emilia. I’m just saying that… if you won’t come, we’re gonna stay here just like this while Iris goes to the other room and grabs your daughter. She’s gonna take her to Chris and explain everything, and that’s it.”

He wants to take Ivy away from me?

No…

No…

This can’t be happening.

“You wouldn’t.” I shake my head.

“Try me.”

“Fuck you.”

“I’m sorry.”

“Fuck you!” I shout and feel myself on the verge of crying. Why did I invite him into my house in the first place? I should’ve told Wooyoung to poison him somehow. I should’ve run away again.

“So, will you come with us?” Minho asks again.

“Wooyoung… what in the world…”

“I think we have to go with them, unfortunately…”

“But…”

“You don’t want to? Would you let them take Ivy?” Wooyoung whispers.

“Fuck, no. Ivy is my baby. She’s mine. Minho, come on. You can’t do this. You seriously can’t.”

I watch as Minho’s face contorts; he looks like he’s in pain, and I get the sense that this isn’t easy for him either. Still, I can’t accept it. I don’t want Ivy to meet Chris.

I don’t want to meet Chris.

I’m not ready.

“I’m not ready.” I let out, and Minho closes his eyes again.

“I’m sorry.”

I tense up and curse over and over again. Wooyoung tries to touch my shoulder and I smack his hand away, and I get an overwhelming sense to scream and shout and curse the world.

I ran away for so long, only to have my wrists tied by the same ropes of the past.

No matter how far I tried to run, no matter what I did to hide, and even without specifically wanting to, someone from Stray Kids found me.

It wasn’t Jeongin. If it were, I might’ve been able to reason with him.

Hell, if it were anyone else besides Minho, I might’ve just been able to get away.

But it’s not.

It’s Minho, who is as ruthless, if not more, than Chris. Who would never leave me alone and forget he’s ever met me here. Who’s seen my daughter, Chan’s child, and would never ignore the fact that I ran away with his boss’ baby.

Faced with all this information, I know there is no choice but to swallow the lump in my throat and go with him. It’s the only way to ensure I can protect Ivy on this path we’re forced to take.

~

Chapter 2 | Chapter 4