#I'm always so awkward about being open about my orientation

[tare-anime]

SxF Mission 97

(Beware spoiler)

OmG!!!!!

I can't believe we really get Henry and Martha?????!!!

And a complete backstory of their tragic love story!!!

Yes. We know they didn't end up together. 😭😭😭

But even so, Martha apparently has never forget about him. And Henry has never forget about her but keep denying the fact that even the dorm mother knew about it. 😭😭😭

Tell me this panel isn't parrallel to Twilight???

For all the mission. For all the ambition. Henry didn't "spare a thought for the heart of those even closer"??

A heart that still trying to hope until she didn't have any more choice but to accept the truth??

😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

Gosh. Young Henry was so so sooooo stiff and only educational oriented. Just like Twilight now.

Meanwhile young Martha was so soo soooooo carefree, a bit socially awkward, but kind and open with her feelings (and later, she's good with taking care of kids!). Just like Yor now.

I see it Endo... I see the parrallels of Henry / Martha and TwiYor.

But the former ended up as tragic love story.

While the latter????? 🥶🥶🥶🥶 Endo I'm begging youuuuuu.....

Btw, I will not give up my M&Ms ship just yet. Until Endo proof me otherwise next chapter.

I mean.....

Did y'all see Matthew there?

Mmm??

There!!

He has always been there.

Watching how Martha chased after Henry , yet the man choose to leave her

Maybe that's how Matthew and Martha carry on their own story from there.

Martha being in the Garden with Matthew? Yet Martha choose to quit, while Matthew choose to carry on.

Aaaaahhhhhhh

We're getting closer and closer to chp 100. And I'm getting more and more anxious! 😭

[batfammeetsspidergang]

Spider-Gang Headcanons

I was bored, so I decided to create headcanon character sheets for the Spider-Folks! Basically, this is how I personally envision the characters when doing incorrect quotes. Like I've said before, these origins are mish-mashes of the comics, TV shows, movies, games, and so on, plus some minor, original ideas. (And yes, I was lazy so I copy-pasted much of the info and stats from the Marvel Wiki. Shout-out to the editors and their amazing work!)

If your favorite Spider-People aren't here, that DOES NOT MEAN I don't like them! Lmao I adore Pavitr, Cindy, Jess, etc. These are just my personal favorites. Also, I'm still tryna figure out Ham's cartoon powers, and movie-verse Miguel can go sit on a barbed wire brush XD

P.S. No ai art was used. These are all borrowed from official Marvel media.

🕷️ 🕷️ 🕷️

Spider-Man

Peter Benjamin Parker

New York City, New York; present-day

16-18 years old

5′10″ (1.78 m)

160 lbs (72.57 kg)

Eyes: brown

Hair: brown

Gender: Cis male

Orientation: Bisexual

Peter Parker was bitten by a radioactive spider and gained a suite of powers reminiscent of a spider, including agility, wall-crawling, and the ability to sense danger. When Peter learned that his beloved Uncle Ben had been murdered by a thief that Peter himself had selfishly allowed to escape, he realized that with his new powers also came a responsibility to use them for good. Since that day, Spider-Man has fought criminals while enduring a constant barrage of negative press, a stream of personal losses, and the occasional crisis of confidence. Somehow he manages to maintain a positive attitude and rarely lacks for a humorous quip when battling bad guys.

PERSONALITY:

-Peter is a geeky, shy, socially awkward, high-spirited, caring, and friendly teenage boy who is loyal to his family and friends. While his heroics as Spider-Man have given him a reputation for being a flake, Peter will always be there for anyone that needs help. 

-Since the death of his beloved Uncle Ben, Peter's vow of responsibility has led him on a path of heroism and humanitarianism. He regularly sacrifices (or sabotages) his personal well-being for the greater good. It has also meant that Peter often takes on more burdens than he can bear and blames himself unnecessarily when the city is hurt.

-He possesses an innate scientific curiosity and loves to figure out how things work. He has been known to immerse himself in personal projects for hours on end, forgetting to eat and sleep as a result.

-Though it can be difficult for him to open up with new people, he becomes enthusiastic and talkative when asked about his favorite subjects (i.e. science, photography, TTRPGs, the New York Mets).

-Peter has a tendency to use humor and sarcasm as a defense mechanism, a trait that is amplified when he fights criminals as Spider-Man. He is proud of his humor, deploying it to break tensions and lift the mood, something that has at times irritated his friends and allies.

-Peter also has a bit of a vengeful side—he once secretly used his powers to humiliate his bullies and was single-minded in his pursuit of revenge for his uncle’s death. If Peter's trust is betrayed, it can be difficult to get back in his good graces.

-His humility often teeters on the edge of self-loathing, to the point of considering himself lamer than his counterparts. These feelings also extend to his romantic relationships—Peter is often blind to his crush’s reciprocated feelings simply because he doesn’t believe they could ever be reciprocated. According to Peter, he always falls for people who are "way out of his league."

-Behind his naturally upbeat demeanor, Peter possesses a tragic and depressed side. This is brought on by the immense guilt he feels about the deaths of people he held close: Ben Parker and Gwen Stacy, his first girlfriend.

POWERS & ABILITIES:

Spider Physiology: Peter Parker possesses the proportionate powers of a spider, granted to him by the bite of an irradiated spider.

Superhuman Strength: Peter can lift up to 10 tons. His physical strength also extends into his legs, enabling him to jump to a height of several stories in a single bound.

Superhuman Speed: Peter possesses the proportionate speed of a spider; therefore, he can run and move at speeds that are beyond the physical limits of the finest human athlete.

Superhuman Stamina: Spider-Man's advanced musculature produces fewer fatigue toxins during physical activity than an ordinary human. This allows him to exert himself physically for much longer periods of time before fatigue begins to impair him.

Superhuman Durability: Peter’s body is physically tougher and more resistant to some types of injury than the body of a normal human. He has shown little to no discomfort when sustaining great impact forces.

Superhuman Agility: Spider-Man's superhuman agility, balance, and bodily coordination are all enhanced to levels that are far beyond the natural physical limits of the finest human athlete. Spider-Man is extraordinarily limber, and his tendons and connective tissues are twice as elastic as the average human being's. He has the combined agility and acrobatic prowess of the most accomplished circus aerialists and acrobats. He can also perform any complicated sequence of gymnastic stunts, such as flips, rolls, and springs.

Superhuman Equilibrium: Peter possesses the ability to achieve a state of perfect equilibrium in any position imaginable. He seems able to adjust his position by instinct, which enables him to balance himself on virtually any object, no matter how small or narrow.

Superhuman Reflexes: Spider-Man's reflexes are similarly enhanced and are currently about 20 times greater than those of an ordinary human. In combination with his spider-sense, the speed of his reflexes allows him to dodge almost any attack.

Wallcrawling: Peter can cling to any surface using just his fingertips and feet.

Spider-Sense: Spider-Man possesses a precognitive danger sense that warns him of potential or immediate danger through the manifestation of a tingling sensation in the back of his skull, and links with his superhuman kinesthetics, enabling him to evade most attacks unless he cognitively overrides his automatic reflexes.

Regeneration: Spider-Man is able to rapidly heal and regenerate from harm faster and more extensively than normal humans are capable of.

Web-Shooters: Spider-Man's trademark equipment. With his brilliance in physical science, Peter created these devices to fire thin strands of a special web fluid at high pressure and speeds. These enable him to web-swing between buildings and entrap enemies.

Web fluid: Created by Peter Parker. A shear-thinning liquid (virtually solid until a shearing force is applied to it, rendering it fluid) whose exact formula is unknown but is related to nylon. On contact with air, the long-chain polymer knits and forms an extremely tough, flexible fiber with extraordinary adhesive properties.

Specialized Web Cartridges

-Acid Webbing: Webbing laced with hydrochloric acid. -Taser Webbing  -Impact Webbing: Web-pellets that, upon impact, release tendrils that ensnare the target.

Spider-Tracers: Small, electronic tracers that allow Spider-Man to track objects or individuals. Typically, he plants or throws one on a departing enemy, but he can also use a launching device in his web-shooters for better range and accuracy. Spider-Man can follow the signal within a 100-yard radius by using his spider-sense.

Genius-Level Intellect: Peter Parker possesses a natural talent for science, standing out as a top student in his high school. His favorite subjects are biology, physics, and chemistry. A prodigy biochemist, Peter could understand his father's, Dr. Richard Parker’s, research notes at age 15.

Expert Inventor/Engineer: As a teenager, he developed his signature web formula, Web-Shooters, and the Spider-Tracers.

Budding Photographer: Peter is a talented photographer and has worked part-time for the Daily Bugle.

Skilled Acrobat: Due to his superhuman physical abilities, Peter easily surpasses normal acrobats and is able to perform somersaults, flips, spins, cartwheels, etc.

Hand-to-Hand Combatant: Spider-Man's fighting style incorporates and takes full advantage of his proper use of physical forces, momentum, and leverage, with the hero staying low and mobile while utilizing the momentum of frequent spins to come crashing down on his opponents. Peter has stated that he is self-taught, having learned many of his fighting techniques from movies and lucha libre.

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Spider-Man (Miles Morales)

Miles Gonzalo Morales

New York City, New York; present-day

16-18 years old

5′8″ (1.73 m)

160 lbs (72.57 kg)

Eyes: brown

Hair: black

Gender: Cis male

Orientation: Heterosexual

Miles Morales, a fellow student of Peter Parker, was bitten by a genetically altered spider that his uncle had stolen from Osborn Industries. The next day at school, he found that he had grown taller overnight and gained incredible, arachnid-like powers. Donning a similar costume, Miles became a budding superhero with the original Spider-Man as his mentor. Miles was the first person Spider-Man revealed his identity to, and they have become the closest of friends. Miles considers Peter a great hero, but can he live up to the legacy set before him?

PERSONALITY:

-Miles is a passionate, bright, confident, selfless, and extremely eager young man. 

-Miles' dedication to helping others stems from his deep respect for his father, Officer Jefferson Morales, and his admiration of Peter Parker as Spider-Man. He draws his passion for science from his mother, Rio, who is highly regarded for her boundless dedication to being a nurse. Moreover, being a long-time fan of Spider-Man, Miles aspires to uphold his mentor and friend’s legacy while also forging his own path.

-Like average Spider-Men, he has an irreverent attitude towards villains, although when enemies indicate psychological instability, Miles addresses them respectfully to prevent further danger.

-He has a strong love for science, having started inventing at an early age, as well as a passion for music, mixing hip-hop beats with his uncle during his early years.

-He is much more sociable than Peter Parker, and often initiates conversations with strangers in his neighborhood.

-Miles instantly fell for Gwen Stacy upon their first meeting. They’ve since become the best of friends, though a part of Miles still pines for her romantically. 

-His relationship with his Uncle Aaron is complex; while Miles acknowledges Aaron's inherent goodness, he also grapples with his uncle's shadowy past as the Prowler and their differing views on heroism.

-Miles' eagerness to be a hero is both a strength and weakness; it propels his desire to grow and assist others, but it also makes him prone to danger and reluctant to accept help. Additionally, he has been known to act impulsively on occasion. Miles also dislikes being a victim or receiving pity. 

-He initially displayed panic and insecurity due to struggling to handle even basic spider powers, and he felt unworthy of the Spider-Man mantle. When it is up to him to save the city on his own, Miles occasionally has doubts about his capabilities, often comparing himself to Peter. 

-Miles' intellect and love for others can cloud his judgment. At times, he can be too arrogant to listen to those who might know better

POWERS & ABILITIES:

Spider Physiology: Miles Morales gained the proportionate abilities of a spider after being bitten by a genetically-modified spider.

Superhuman Strength: Miles can lift roughly 10 tons.

Superhuman Speed

Superhuman Stamina

Superhuman Durability

Superhuman Agility: Miles' agility, balance, flexibility, and bodily coordination are all enhanced to levels that are far beyond the natural physical limits of an Olympic-level gymnast.

Superhuman Equilibrium

Superhuman Reflexes

Wallcrawling

Spider-Sense: When danger is present, Miles feels a buzzing sensation in his head as a sort of early warning system, allowing him to react accordingly. His spider-sense offers him near-complete awareness of his surroundings and, in conjunction with his reflexes, allows him to instinctively dodge or counter nearly all attacks. 

Bio-Electrokinesis: Miles is able to generate and manipulate a form of bio-electricity that his body produces and can utilize the energy for multiple purposes. Miles has learned to discharge the energy from his hands in controlled bursts of what he calls "Venom Blasts".

-Mega Venom Blast: Arguably Miles' deadliest ability. Miles is able to emit a larger scale burst of bio-electricity from his entire body. It is powerful enough to repel a large group of opponents and destroy sturdy restraints. This ability leaves Miles exhausted after using it, and can be triggered with focus or by extreme stress. -Venom Beam: Miles has shown that he can channel his bio-electricity outward as a direct burst of electrostatic energy to knock away enemies in a stunning/concussive manner. -Venom Punch: Miles can enhance the power of his punches by infusing his fists with bio-electricity. -Lateral Repulsion: By projecting a controlled Venom Blast, Miles is able to launch himself in the air with greater force than when jumping or web-swinging.

Camouflage: Miles, including his clothing, can blend into his surroundings, allowing him to sneak up on his enemies or, in some cases, flee from them. The resulting effect closely resembles that of invisibility.

Regeneration

Web-Shooters

Bilingualism: Miles speaks English and Spanish.

Gifted Intellect: A fast learner from a young age, Miles is a highly gifted individual with an aptitude for science. He attends the Robotics Club at school and has experience in programming applications. Upon discovering his bio-electric powers, he demonstrated an impressive understanding of biophysics, throwing out possible explanations for this new power, such as electrolytes. At the start of his superhero career, he was able to mimic the original Spider-Man's fighting style by watching online videos to improve his own abilities.

Photographic memory

Skilled Acrobat

Hand-to-Hand Combatant: Despite his lack of formal training prior to his spider-bite, Miles' enhanced agility, reflexes, and coordination made him an extraordinary melee fighter. He has developed his own unique combat style which incorporates a rudimentary form of boxing, Capoiera, and breakdancing.

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Spider-Woman

Gwendolyn "Gwen" Maxine Stacy

Alternate New York City, New York; present-day

16-18 years old

5′5″ (1.65 m)

125 lbs (56.7 kg)

Eyes: blue

Hair: blond

Gender: Trans female

Orientation: Heterosexual

Leaping from an alternate reality in which she was bitten by a radioactive spider instead of Peter Parker, Gwen Stacy learned the painful lesson that with great power must come great responsibility. At first, Gwen used her new powers for selfish reasons, reveling in the attention it brought her. Meanwhile, her friend, the bullied Peter Parker, turned himself into a lizard monster because he was desperate to be special like her. Gwen inadvertently killed Peter during the ensuing fight, and the police blamed her for his death. Seeking redemption, she now fights crime as the amazing Spider-Woman.

PERSONALITY:

-Gwen Stacy is a spunky, sarcastic, awkward, and emotionally vulnerable teenage girl. She has a history of rejecting friendship since she can't bear to go through the pain of losing another loved one. After getting to know Miles Morales and Hobie Brown, however, she tentatively decided to give companionship a chance.

-Gwen initially put on a tough, antisocial front when she met the other Spider-People, but she has come to view the Spider-Gang as family and is fiercely protective of them.

-It can be difficult for her to look at the other Peters when they are unmasked, hence why it was initially easier for her to interact with Miles and Hobie. 

-Currently, Gwen's interest in Miles is platonic, bordering on sibling affection.

-Gwen has a zero-tolerance policy for bullying, especially where her friends are concerned. On impulse, she will intervene on their behalf. With this in mind, Gwen and Peter (Spider-Man) have sworn to always watch each other's backs.

-There used to be unresolved tension between Gwen and her police officer father, George Stacy, regarding the morality of Spider-Woman’s vigilantism. Upon realizing that the vigilante he had been pursuing for years was his very own daughter, George reached out to Gwen about her problems and insecurities. Father and daughter have reconciled, and George Stacy has become Spider-Woman’s staunchest supporter.

-She is absolutely fearless in battle, but not to the point of recklessness.

-Gwen’s relationship with her bandmates has become somewhat strained since her superhero lifestyle often interferes with their gigs. That said, Gwen’s band members have made attempts at getting her to open up about her feelings and trauma.

-Gwen tends to bottle up her emotions and release them when she's playing drums, leading to her being particularly angry and distant. When dealing with people she is unsure of, she puts up fronts and walls to appear more confident and put together than she actually is.

-She hates when Noir calls her "doll."

-Her favorite band is The Smashing Pumpkins.

-Outside of music, her hobbies include skateboarding, gymnastics, and ballet.

POWERS & ABILITIES:

Spider Physiology: Gwen gained the proportionate abilities of a spider after being bitten by a radioactive spider—genetically engineered based upon the genetic template of alien spider parasites.

Superhuman Strength: Gwen can lift roughly 10 tons.

Superhuman Speed

Superhuman Stamina

Superhuman Durability

Superhuman Agility

Superhuman Equilibrium

Superhuman Reflexes

Spider-Sense

Wallcrawling

Regeneration

Web-Shooters: Twin devices, which she wears on her wrists, that trap moisture from the air to create a "web-fluid" that allows her to eject web ropes, nets, and globs. The Web-Shooters also enable her to web-swing between buildings. Given to Gwen by her universe’s Janet Van Dyne. 

Amateur Detective: Gwen has a proclivity for analytical thinking and detective work. She is also the daughter of a police captain, thus she knows some police protocols and methods.

Skilled Fighter: Gwen is a skilled freestyle fighter. That said, she is untrained and learned most of her moves from Kung Fu movies.

Trained ballerina: Gwen trained in ballet since she was young. Her ballet training has allowed her to be incredibly precise when moving, often walking on the tips of her toes. Evidently, her ballet experience is incorporated into her fighting style.

Trained gymnast: Gwen was a member of the gymnastics team at her school; even before her radioactive spider bite, Gwen was able to hold her own body weight and possessed an athletic build similar to that of an acrobat. She incorporated her gymnastics training into her fighting style.

Trained musician: Gwen plays the drums with her band, The Mary Janes.

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Spider-Man Noir

Peter Benjamin Parker

Alternate New York City, New York; 1933 AD

Approximately 19 years old

6′1″ (1.85 m)

150 lbs (68.04 kg)

Eyes: brown

Hair: brown

Gender: Cis male

Orientation: Bisexual or Demisexual (still figuring it out)

In another New York, in the year 1933, Norman Osborn murdered Ben Parker for encouraging a strike on the local sweatshops. Seeking justice for his uncle, Peter Parker became an investigative journalist in an attempt to expose the corruption in New York. One evening, Peter was investigating a warehouse where Osborn's henchmen were housing stolen artifacts. An ancient spider statue broke open and released a swarm of spiders, one of which bit Peter. He passed out and dreamed of a spider god who told him it would bestow the curse of power on him. When Peter came to, he discovered that he had been gifted with arachnid-like superpowers. Thus, Peter became the Spider-Man: a dark avenger fighting for the rights of the downtrodden and waging a one-man war on crime.

PERSONALITY:

-Noir Peter Parker is an unwavering, righteous, sympathetic, brooding, solitary young man of few words.

-Peter grew up witnessing injustice in the harsh environment of the Great Depression. This, combined with his Uncle Ben’s horror stories about the First World War, made Peter distrustful of would-be leaders and political figures. He’s leery of police officers; in his world and time period, especially, police corruption is rampant.

-Unlike most Spider-Men, Noir Peter was never taught the motto "With great power, there must also come great responsibility." Instead, his Uncle Ben told him, "If those in power can’t be trusted, it’s the responsibility of the people to remove them."

-Peter’s jaded demeanor and bleak realism belie his indomitable will and inherent idealism. He will never stop fighting for truth and progress, no matter the personal cost.

-Peter is a devout socialist and liberal activist, often participating in protests for workers’ rights, racial equality, and standing against the rising tide of Nazism.

-Peter is an empiricist—he believes his eyes, no matter how implausible something may be. Ever since his encounter with the Spider-God, he has gradually come to accept that some things are never going to have an explanation.

-Unlike the other Spider-People, Peter is willing to kill his enemies if absolutely necessary.

-Peter struggles with trauma and depression, perhaps more than his counterparts. To cope and better do his job, he closes off his emotions and ignores his bodily needs.

-Peter smokes cigarettes, even though he has been warned that they cause cancer. The nicotine helps calm his nerves, and he doubts that he’s capable of contracting cancer due to his powers.

-Peter puts on a convincing, deeper voice to make himself seem older. The rest of the Spider-Gang was dumbstruck when they learned he wasn’t much older than them.

POWERS & ABILITIES:

Superhuman Abilities: Peter possesses enhanced physical abilities granted to him by the Spider-God.

Superhuman Strength: Slightly inferior to that of his mainstream counterpart.

Superhuman Speed

Superhuman Stamina

Superhuman Durability: Although he is incredibly durable, his body does have its limits—unlike his modern counterparts, he cannot sustain multiple injuries and continue to function.

Superhuman Agility

Superhuman Equilibrium

Spider-Sense

Wall-Crawling: He can stick to walls using just his fingertips and feet; however, Peter prefers a type of parkour over clinging to the walls themselves.

Organic Webbing: Spider-Man is able to shoot organic black webbing out of his wrists. However, he cannot generate webbing in a constant stream (like his more modern counterparts) and is therefore unable to travel via swinging on webs.

Night Vision

Regeneration: Slightly superior to that of his mainstream counterpart.

Pain Resistance: Ever since he was bitten, Peter no longer feels physical pain as potently as an average human.

Gifted Intellect: Peter is of above-average intelligence and possesses a natural talent for science.

Experienced Reporter: Peter is a gifted investigative reporter and very skilled photographer.

Investigator: Honing his talents as an investigative reporter, Peter has become experienced in detective work and research.

Hand-to-Hand Combatant: He is formidable in hand-to-hand combat, having received boxing training from the Daredevil of his universe.

Skilled Marksman: Peter is adept in the use of and has impeccable aim with firearms; more often than not, he is able to hit his targets accurately.

Weapons: Peter has been known to carry revolvers and incendiary grenades.

Glasses: Unlike other Spider-People, after receiving his powers, Peter still requires corrective lenses to see properly. 

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Spider-Punk

Hobart "Hobie" Brown

Alternate London, United Kingdom; c. 1977-early 80s

Approximately 19 years old

5′11″ (1.8 m)

150 lbs (68.04 kg)

Eyes: brown

Hair: black

Gender: Cis male

Orientation: Pansexual

In an alternate London, foul-mouthed teenager Hobart Brown was living as a squatter in a United Kingdom ruled by the fascist regime of Prime Minister "Ozzy" Osborn. He was bitten by a spider irradiated by illegal waste dumping, which gave him spider superpowers. With his newfound powers, Hobie became a punk-rock-inspired Spider-Man and led the oppressed people of London in a revolt against Osborn and his storm troopers. Spider-Punk is defined by his rebellious attitude towards absolutely everything, and will take any opportunity to turn on an establishment, regardless of the consequences.

PERSONALITY:

-Hobie is a zealous, headstrong, brazen, uncompromising, and altruistic young man.

-Although he pretends to be an apathetic badass, Hobie clearly has a deep connection to his team and a surprising amount of respect for Spider-Man Noir.

-He is surprisingly good with children.

-Hobie is an extremely devout anarchist who chafes at all forms of authority. Whenever he is given orders, Hobie makes it clear that he’s only going along with them because he wants to. Put simply, Hobie fights evil on his own terms.

-Hobie lives by two rules: No Gods. No Masters. He hates the rich, authorities, and politicians.

-Hobie takes the Spider-Man staple of flippancy to a whole new level—oftentimes, he doesn’t even attempt to be clever with his quips, instead throwing out the harshest insults he can come up with. 

-As a musician and activist, he integrates anti-authority messages into his performances. He frequently encourages (and joins) mosh pits among the audience. Such acts are deemed illegal in his home universe… not that he cares. 

-Hobie is a terrible singer, but he argues that’s what punk rock is all about.

-With the plethora of questionable decisions he’s made just to survive, Hobie does not consider himself a role model, let alone a hero. Despite this, he still has high praise for himself and tries to project an aura of "cool."

-Hobie's boots are ladder laced. In punk culture, ladder lacing with colored laces is a way to discreetly express your beliefs. Hobie's laces are blue, which means the wearer has killed a police officer. Though Hobie remains unwilling to divulge many aspects of his life, he has mentioned that he was once betrayed by a police officer…

-Hobie enjoys playing with people’s gender expectations and dresses as androgynously as possible. He believes that it is impossible to separate punk history from queer history.

POWERS & ABILITIES:

Spider Physiology: After being bitten by a spider irradiated by illegal waste dumping, Hobart obtained the proportionate powers of a spider.

Superhuman Strength: Hobie can lift at least one ton.

Superhuman Speed

Superhuman Stamina

Superhuman Durability

Superhuman Agility

Superhuman Equilibrium

Superhuman Reflexes

Spider-Sense

Wallcrawling

Regeneration

Web-Shooters

Modified guitar: An instrument that can emit a large shockwave attack similar to Miles Morales’ "venom power". In addition, the guitar can play frequencies strong enough to cause electronic equipment to malfunction.

Cricket bat: A simple yet effective wooden bat inscribed with "Beat on the Brat," a Ramones lyric.

Engineer: Hobart is a tech genius, able to create his Web-Shooters and a functional dimension-hopping watch after studying the properties of Peni Parker’s teleportation device. He was also able to engineer his guitar into a weapon.

Skilled Acrobat: Spider-Punk is able to perform acrobatic and gymnastic moves, such as high jumps, somersaults, flips, etc. at a level far beyond the ability of normal humans.

Hand-to-Hand Combatant: Hobie has years of street fighting experience. He utilizes techniques that enable him to make full use of his speed, agility, and strength. However, he lacks any formal training.

Musician: Hobie is a talented musician and plays both guitar and drums.

🕷️ 🕷️ 🕷️

SP//dr

Peni Parker

Futuristic New York City, New York; 3145 AD

9-13 years old

4′11″ (1.5 m), 9′ (2.74 m) (in armor)

105 lbs (47.63 kg), 900 lbs (408.23 kg) (in armor)

Eyes: brown

Hair: black

Gender: Cis female

Orientation: Asexual

In an alternate Japan, in the year 3145, Peni Parker was born the only daughter of Dr. Richard Parker. When she was 9 years old, her father passed away piloting the SP//dr suit. She would be adopted by her Aunt May and Uncle Ben in New York, and they informed her that she was the last person able to bond with the radioactive spider that controlled Richard’s bionic armor. Peni accepted this responsibility, allowed the radioactive spider to bite her, and repaired the mech suit. Now known as SP//dr, Peni protects her futuristic neighborhood with her new best spider-friend and a powerful robotic suit!

PERSONALITY:

-Peni is a peppy, energetic, optimistic, intelligent, tough, and somewhat smug girl. 

-Peni’s bubbly nature is infectious, and she loves making new friends. She quite literally views the Spider-Gang as her family, even addressing them as onii-chan (big brother) and onee-chan (big sister) respectively. Likewise, she cherishes her bond with the SP//dr spider more than anything—in many ways, it’s her last connection to her father.

-A generally happy-go-lucky person, it is rare to see her sad or discouraged. That said, if grief or anxiety do strike, her productivity takes a sharp decline. She is a very emotional person, and her friends’ struggles affect her profoundly.

-Peni is a responsible and dedicated individual; she has devoted countless hours to her studies and working on her father's suit. That said, she can be a tad arrogant where her work is concerned, and bristles at outside input or assistance. It can be difficult to get Peni to accept technological help or admit when she’s made a mistake.

-Peni is proud of her intellect to an almost vain degree. She unconsciously comes off as condescending when explaining her technology to others, especially Spider-Man Noir (even though he can easily pick up how modern tech works).

-In battle, she is ruthless, aggressive, and devastatingly analytical.

-She has a habit of striking magical girl or idol singer poses.

-Peni is a vegetarian but isn’t preachy about it.

-Peni has an ultra-secret candy stash hidden… somewhere.

-Her hobbies include J-pop and manga (she’s recently gotten into Boys’ and Girls’ Love).

POWERS & ABILITIES:

Genius-Level Intellect: Peni Parker is extremely intelligent, mostly regarding her exceptional scientific, engineering, and hacking skills. 

Scientist: A wunderkind prodigy, she is remarkably skilled and knowledgeable in a wide range of scientific fields.

Engineer: Peni takes great pride in her engineering intelligence, which has enabled her to create upgrades for her SP//dr armor and even invent an inter-dimensional teleportation device.

Expert Hacker

SP//dr Suit Mk III: A psychically-powered mech suit created by Peni’s father. The SP//dr suit is genetically linked to her, so only Peni may use it. The suit uses magnetically manipulated appendages for versatility, wall-crawling, and enhanced strength, and it can shoot lasers from its fingers and weld various metals. Additionally, wrist-mounted web shooters built into the SP//dr suit allow it to web-swing between buildings and entrap enemies. The suit is shielded against radiation, biological, chemical, corrosive, and electrical attacks. In the cockpit, there is an on-board computer operating system that aids Peni in accessing the internet, providing background information, and connecting with (or hacking into) other devices. The inside also has a snack compartment.

Bilingualism: Peni speaks Japanese and English.

Expert pilot: Peni’s piloting abilities have advanced to the point where the SP//dr suit feels like an extension of her body.

Psychic link: Peni allowed herself to be bitten by the SP//dr spider—a radioactive, sentient spider (whom she refers to as her best friend) acting as one half of the CPU that makes the SP//dr suit work. Beyond piloting the suit, the spider shares thoughts and emotions with Peni.

Spider-Sense: Through her psychic connection, Peni possesses a precognitive "spider" sense that warns her of potential immediate danger.

🕷️ 🕷️ 🕷️

[idolomantises]

talking abt that one thing in velma thats on my mind a lot for the past few days (that turned into a big incoherent rambling about gay rep in media)

i'm seeing jokes about how the queer representation in mystery inc being so much better than the queer representation in velma and honestly it makes me want to go on a whole tangent about my thoughts on queer representation nowadays vs the more subtle examples decades prior.

There's this weird debate that goes on online about what is "good" queer representation, and one of the most notable and honestly annoying examples is that queer representation has to be so subtle that you could easily miss it/ignore it. i've always hated that take because its a claim mostly said by straight people who are uncomfortable with seeing characters who are openly queer and/or state their identity, but they present it as some sort of push for subtle and nuanced writing. personally i do prefer it when a character just, identifies as how they are without explaining their identity, but that doesn't mean flat out explaining your orientation is inherently bad representation. its why i will always defend the very clunky and awkward high guardian spice scene. it is absolutely poorly directed and written, but that doesn't make it "bad representation". however, I do consider the character who explains that he's trans bad representation because he is flat, uninteresting and very clearly a creator self insert. he doesn't feel like a well rounded character who's also a trans man, but just an incredibly sanitized example of trans representation.

i have many, many issues with helluva boss/hazbin hotel and i do genuinely find some depictions of queer characters just flat out offensive (you can argue with me about how angel dust being written like your average 90s gay stereotype is woke actually because he has trauma, i dont care), but i do admire and appreciate that the series doesn't want to sanitize its queer characters, even if its done poorly. though i could go into a whole rant about how i find it very telling that female characters that are queer are far less sexualized or allowed to be problematic compared to their queer male counterparts.

anyways back to velma. that show does something that i've always found pretty irritating in queer representation which is just this weird lack of faith in its audience. characters can't have a slow burn anymore. internalized thoughts, anger, frustration, longing. you have to immediately know that two characters are gay for each other, even if they're lifelong enemies. its like when modern horror movies open with the gore because they're scared people are going to be bored or leave early. there's no subtlety or chemistry between daphne and velma, they're just lovers because idk, its two girls who hate each other and who doesn't love that.

then i think about how mystery inc handled velma and her sexuality, how she was allowed to be well rounded and nuanced before you slowly realize that "oh, she doesn't like boys". i know her whole thing with shaggy is controversial among fans but i always loved how she does do something pretty unlikable but not immoral. yeah, it is shitty to force shaggy to choose between her and his dog, but i can understand her line of thinking and empathize with her. and i do like how they become friends in the end despite their awkward break up. It's always fun rewatching it and realizing that their incredibly awkward and cringe relationship was meant to be awkward and cringe. it was supposed to be weird and difficult to watch, because those two weren't meant to date each other. you could see how hard velma was trying to make the relationship work despite the fact that you never get the vibe that either character was full invested in it, unlike daphne and fred's relationship.

then you had velma and her relationship with marcie, which started off as sort of a catty rivalry (not full on attempted murder, i mean holy shit hbo velma) that slowly grows to where you're completely convinced that these two did gradually like each other. and i do really enjoy stuff like that, more subtle writing like that. which doesn't just apply to queer rep btw, my favorite ships are relationships that feel understated, something you have to really dig for and pay attention to. its why i consider bubbline the best f/f representation in cartoon. because its subtle, but not too subtle where it feels out of no where when they kiss, and nuanced in ways that enhances the relationship AND characters.

there's a good amount of relationships i see in cartoons where the creator, who is usually queer themselves, often wants to depict queer relationships, but is weirdly adverse to depicting the uglier aspects of that character, and refuses to add subtlety to it. steven universe is a show i've always felt conflicted on its handling of queer representation because on the one hand i appreciate writing lesbians that are messy, traumatized and make constant mistakes. but on the other hand, the show goes out of its way to ignore these issues and/or make excuses for it, making the decision to make these characters messy and complicated genuinely baffling (this is also one of the big issues i have with catradora and stolitz).

it makes me think back to my own work too. i really enjoy making fluffy, easily digestible gay content for my followers and myself because it puts me in a good headspace. But even now and then i like exploring those little nuances too, because i don't really enjoy stories with little conflict. Because of that acknowledgement of how satisfying it is to write fluffy, queer rep, you end up putting yourself in other creator's shoes. you're so used to media that either dehumanizes gay people or tells people that they don't exist that you push yourself to make the most in your face queer rep you can but its at the cost of an interesting and subtle characters. characters that don't really have arcs or places to learn and grow.

With bugtopia i made a joke about how i want some of my queer rep to feel like you're being queerbaited. It's not literal, obviously, but mixed in with characters who are already married and in same gender relationships, i really want to write dynamics that feel subtle enough for a bit of a slow burn. even if you know they're going to end up together, to at least value the characters on their own before centering them on their relationships. queerbaiting is something that deserves all the criticism it can get, but it is embarrassing when queerbaiting feels genuinely more interesting than actual queer rep because queerbaiting has that factor of "maybe they won't get together" that adds that bit of intrigue, vs so many shows that repeatedly hammer in your head "don't worry guys, they're gonna be lesbian lovers".

mystery inc (and many other shows) being forced to keep a relationship obvious while subtle to get through censorship really forced creators to be creative with their storytelling and not center characters around their relationship and identity. but nowadays i think shows like to take the easy way out. for me, i always thought the most impactful example of queer representation in steven universe is "Rose's Scabbard". I genuinely don't enjoy that episode because it's a good example of the show thinking that trauma is an excuse for shitty behavior, but i cant deny that an entire episode of pearl breaking down and finally accepting that she wasn't the center of rose's world. it's the crew being forced to be creative and push through censors to telling a compelling story about a traumatized lesbian slowly realizing that she basically deluded herself into thinking she was someone's savior.

I think it's silly to try to place good queer representation in one box. like subtle queer rep is good, but also queer rep where a character flat out states that their gay. where I think it falls apart is when it either reinforces stereotypes without properly deconstructing or expanding on them, makes the characters so overly kind and non-controversial that the relationship is just boring, or try to make your messy and complicated characters but the narrative refuses to hold them accountable or at least acknowledge that they're doing something wrong. and to clarify on that last part, i'm not asking for some hays code nonsense where every bad person goes to prison and/or promises to stop being a bad person again. i mean the narrative doesnt just fucking sugarcoat their behavior. i don't want to see helluva boss ignore the fact that stolas made blitzo call him out for only using him for sex and then pathetically rush to justify their relationship by giving them a bizarrely sanitized and sweet backstory. and i don't want to see catra literally end the fucking universe and only do something good because she's straight up out of options and the show just decides that that was her redemption and she doesn't need to do anything to atone for what she did (including repeatedly abusing and verbally berating adora).

anyways velma has none of those interesting qualities and i'm pretty sure daphne and velma kissed because the creator is a weird pervert who thinks two girls kissing is hot.

[ghostradiodylan]

I know there has been a lot of discussion about how the Quarry characters are described, but do you think they would describe themselves any differently?

I'm so sorry Kat, I wanted to take some time to think about this and then completely forgot it was in my ask box!

This is SUCH an interesting question with lots to consider. I think this depends somewhat on who they're describing themselves to, but let's imagine it's an honest self-assessment and not, like, trying to look good on a job cover letter or college entrance essay or something like that.

Jacob - This one's tough for me because Jacob seems to sometimes believe in his own hype, but he can also see himself as kind of a loser? Like, he prances up in his undies and tells everyone "I'm here to save you!" 😂 But he also mopes and cries and has a tough time even if we don't get the 'I'm not alive, I'm nothing' sad infected boy. I think Jacob sees himself as a leader even if others don't (and some do, I mean, look at Nick). I think he'd say he's brave (and he can be! he runs off in the dark after Abi screams, for example), optimistic, fun-loving, and loyal. He might not be aware of how impulsive his actions are, though he also might be after the extra night he orchestrated goes as badly as it does.

Emma - Emma causes a lot of strife for others in this game for someone who I genuinely think means well most of the time. She's trying to manipulate her friends in ways that she believes will be good for them, but not everyone welcomes her interventions. She has a flair for the dramatic and I feel like she knows that about herself and knows that she's performing a lot of the time. I think Emma would see herself as pragmatic, goal-oriented, charming, and entertaining.

Abi - Abi's a sweet, sensitive type and she seems to know herself pretty well. She's a rule-follower and a peacemaker and while she feels awkward sometimes, I think Abi has a way of putting others at ease. I think she'd describe herself as creative, empathetic, and conscientious, but she'd also admit to being a little timid and prone to over-thinking at times.

Ryan - Ryan also sees himself as a leader, even if he sometimes has trouble getting other people on board with that view. I don't think he sees himself as a brooding loaner, though he comes off that way, but he knows he's introverted and maybe he'd call himself introspective instead. Ryan would probably see himself as humble, dependable, strong-willed, and authentic. He knows he doesn't always come across as confident, but he does stick to his guns.

Kaitlyn - To me, Kaitlyn has the least emotional development of any of the characters, and while I love what we do see of her so much, I wish we saw more of what makes her tick. Kaitlyn's a badass and she knows it, but we see glimpses of a softer side to her with Abi and Dylan that imply she's got more depth to her than she lets on. I think she'd think of herself as self-assured, level-headed, sarcastic, and (sometimes brutally) honest.

Dylan - Dylan refers to his 'blasé' persona as a 'stylish nihilist' in the cut content, but I'm not sure he totally understands what that word means. Because while Dylan can be paranoid and even a little cynical, he's also incredibly hopeful and resilient over the course of the game. I think his self-description might change a lot depending on when you ask him and what path his character takes. But as far as his core personality, I think he'd see himself as intelligent, open-minded, funny (I don't think his humor is an act, I think he just plays up that side more when he's uncomfortable), and intuitive. He's also well aware of his own insecurities. Would he admit to being a hopeless romantic too? He'd probably prefer not to, but I think he knows.

Nick - We get so little of Nick, and what we do get can be tainted a bit by the way the werewolf infection affects him, but I think Nick is very candid about the fact that he can be a bit of a follower when he's around stronger personalities. He knows he has a lot of potential, but he's not sure what he wants to do in the future. I think he'd describe himself as respectful (and he is, until the whole infection thing happens), caring, and sociable, but also unfocused or maybe even directionless.

Laura - Laura's progression over the course of the game feels kind of like if Leslie Knope became a monster-hunting vigilante. Laura seems kind of type-A and perfectionistic, like she has a whole bunch of color-coded binders at home. But she also seems to think that just because she wants something to happen (like Max going to the same grad school as her, or them getting to come to camp a night early), that it will. I think she also knows herself pretty well. Laura would say she's self-assured, ambitious, steadfast, and resilient. She might not go so far as to say headstrong, but she probably knows.

Max - Lovable Max, so silly and so sweet, but he can be a touch gloomy and pessimistic too, especially when he's been kidnapped and is dealing with a mysterious supernatural infection (hard to blame him there). Max would describe himself as easygoing (pre-canon, at least), supportive, and friendly and I think he'd absolutely also cop to being sensitive and a bit meek. He does not mind being the 'malewife' to his 'girlboss' partner at all.

[silicon-tmblr]

What are some Sexuality headcanons you have for danganronpa

Ohhhh I have so much to say you have no idea

I'll go with my DRV3 post-game headcanons because that's generally what I think about!

Shuichi: Disaster bi. I recently had the thought that he'd actually be awesome as nonbinary, but I feel like he's the type to realize that in his mid 30s or something

Kaito: Bigger disaster bi than Shuichi somehow. I like to think that, while he's iffy/confused about gay people, he accepts trans people without a thought (he's just like "oh you're actually a guy/girl! okay") and just demands that they "act like their gender" bahaha

Ryoma: I know this is a controversial thing to say but. Straight. cis/het. But he's like the biggest and nicest ally ever because well his entire friend group is very queer

Rantaro: I don't see this enough!!!! Aro/ace Rantaro!!! His love hotel is literally him being a tutor with no romantic or sexual undertones!!!! His character concept is probably "playboy with no interest in romance"!! But yeah aro/ace, romance and sex-repulsed

Gonta: Probably pan, but fairly heteronormative. I feel like he gets married in middle age because he's really not searching for a relationship for most of his life and more busy enjoying his hobbies!

Kokichi: Obviously very gay! I generally have him as a trans guy who, due to some shenanigans that happened in his childhood, thought he was a cis guy (until puberty hit and he had to figure out why he was freaking bleeding). Ironically, I like to call him "the cissest of cis guys" haha

Korekiyo: Ace! Not looking for a romantic relationship but I like to think he has a strong platonic partnership with Tenko

Keebo: Aro/ace, romance-positive and sex-neutral. He doesn't experience romantic or sexual attraction but is totally open to a romantic relationship. Intersex and he/him nonbinary, but he generally keeps it to himself and only tells people he trusts

Kirumi: Gay gay lesbian gay. She loves GL (Girl's love genre) but keeps it a secret

Himiko: Aromantic and bisexual! She tends more towards girls than guys

Maki: PSA Maki is gay and was straightwashed when they put her in Danganronpa 53. I mean, Tsumugi really said "I made you fall in love with a guy for plot!" I like to think Maki gets out of DRV3 and her first thought is "why was I straight" (for legal reasons this is a joke and bi Maki believers are based but. gay maki)

Tenko: Bi Tenko bi Tenko I KNOW people insist she's a lesbian (and you people are based) buuut I think even in Danganronpa Tenko is bi. People don't choose who they're attracted to, so her being raised to hate men doesn't mean she can't be attracted to them! Okay that's my ted talk about bi tenko

Tsumugi: Her orientation is none of your business (is what she will say, but I will expose her as the bisexual she is)

Angie: Pan! Kinda heteronormative but she learns not to be

Miu: Pan. I think she would meet someone on the internet that she clicks super well with and then they fly out to meet each other and get married

Kaede: Lesbian! So lesbian. I will insist forever that she isn't actually interested in Shuichi and is just super awkward around him because she doesn't want to lead him on when she's gay

That's it for V3! I don't have as many for the other games, mostly since I'm not as interested in or familiar with them (I like to joke that V3 has the gayest cast and everyone in DR2 is straight (obviously untrue, the irrefutable evidence: Nagito)), but here's a few I like:

Chiaki: Trans girl! She's also straight bahaha

Hiyoko: I used to think she'd be the type to act homophobic "as a joke" but then I realized she's super gay. She'd probably still act homophobic though

Nagito: Bi, for the sole reason of: I think he should date Chiaki

Akane: Seems ace!

Mahiru: I think she's straight, but she's a total lesbian magnet

Hajime: Bi (duh). Cursed to be maidenless

Chihiro: Nonbinary, he/they in conversation but always they/them in writing

Junko: This lady is very heterosexual and cisgender

Mukuro: Bi

Makoto: Bi

I also like to joke that all the girls in DR1 are straight and all the boys in DR1 are gay because everyone is in love with Makoto (obviously false because there are some very gay girls and not so gay dudes)

[andorerso]

sissi hello!! in regards to the post about ocs, i would LOVE to hear more about dani and elijah 💜 (partly bc i love both of those names so so much, always have, and that intrigues me instantly).

hope you're having a wonderful day!

rolling up almost two months later like hiiiiii <3 sorry it took me so long to answer ahfgdchg

but first of all, thank you for asking because I love talking about them, second of all, I'm so happy you like the names because I do too 🥰 well obviously, I wouldn't have chosen them otherwise, but I'm very particular about names and they have to feel right, and this was one of those instances when I almost instantly knew their names, like it was just fate. meant to be. and I think they sound nice together!! anyway, I'll stop ranting about names now

so, the story is urban fantasy, and their tropes are slowburn, mutual pining, idiots to lovers, battle couple, codependency, angstttttt, two sides of the same coin, flirty & awkward, snarky & serious, impulsive & rational, short-tempered & calm

Dani (full name Danielle Preston but she hates being called Danielle) is our leading lady, she's in her mid-20s, and she's the flirty, snarky, impulsive, short-tempered side of the two. she's always cracking a joke, which is mostly a self-defense mechanism, and tends to cover up real feelings with humor, sex and booze. I have such a soft spot for characters who'd rather cut open a vein than show weakness or vulnerability in front of someone, but still deeply care about people and are intensely loyal if you earn it, so she's kinda that archetype. she'd literally burn down a whole city for someone she loves but will never actually say the words. also she's bisexual like almost all my MCs

here's kind of how I imagine her (made with this picrew)

and Elijah is the more level-headed, serious, all business no fun counterpart to Dani's generally chaotic behavior. he's a couple hundred years old, and not human, but he looks to be in his early 30s. he's very matter-of-fact, goal-oriented, and pragmatic, but he's also very kind to those who deserve it, and can be surprisingly intense and passionate when he actually lets himself feel it (which is not very often, at least not at first). he has a very strong sense of justice, but he kind of follows his own moral code, so he definitely falls into the morally grey category (Dani kind of does too, but Elijah even more so)

here's a picrew for him too

as for their relationship, it starts as kind of an unwilling partnership and they clash a lot at the beginning because of their different approaches and worldviews, but they eventually form a friendship. Elijah's kind of drawn to her/fascinated by her from the start, because she's so different from him but has a lot of the qualities he admires/wishes he had too. Dani takes a bit longer mostly because she's better at lying to herself lmao. but there's an attraction of sort from the beginning. it's a difficult ride, mostly because they're both stubborn idiots who tend to repress their emotions, just in different ways. she's lost people and is afraid to lose more, and he's just not sure he knows how to allow himself to want things and be a functioning human person, so neither wants a relationship and they're both violently trying to deny any feelings. but the feelings are definitely there. like they're not together but they're deeply devoted but they will never admit it but there's no one else who could possibly compare. those kinda vibes, you know?

some other tidbits/details that I love about them: she loves to antagonize him (mostly in a teasing way) and he's so offended/annoyed at first until he realizes it's her love language. then the annoyance turns into fond exasperation. she's pretty much the only one who can make him genuinely smile and laugh, in fact sometimes he's the only one who actually finds her funny at all lmao (she definitely overdoes it sometimes but he finds it charming). she's a bit of a romantic deep down, and he's very intensely devoted once he commits, so it's the kind of relationship she always secretly wanted but never thought could have. and he's the only person she will tolerate calling her Danielle (it's kind of a turn-on from him).

anyway, I could go on but it's gonna get long very quickly, so this is just the basics. but I love talking about them and I'm always open to more specific questions from anyone <3

also here's a moodboard too because why not

[danwhobrowses]

Well fellow Callowmoores, it's almost 2024 and that will potentially be the year we see endgame of Campaign 3 - given how we've returned to the Bloody Bridge and likely intend to throw down on Ruidus and fight Predathos (somehow). Nevertheless, we're about halfway through our three week wait for another episode and since we're on the verge of intense and emotionally-charged battles ahead there'll probably be little time for romantic activity - little does not mean none, mind you - during it. Last time we had a wait like this I did a post on some underrated Callowmoore moments from the Shard Incident episodes, but since others have already wonderfully dissected the recent Feywild episodes' romantic moments I'm afraid I don't have much else to add to that. I do, however, have a bunch of mental scenarios that didn't come to be, or have yet to come to be in different contexts to how I previously thought them up. So I thought; it's the new year, why not indulge the artists and fanfic writers who can do a better job than I can with it?

So if you like some of these things, treat it as a free prompt; draw, write, flourish however you see fit, and have a Happy New Year!

If you kept reading after that awesome, I was a little worried the main thing would be a tldr situation, and still could be I didn't expect the bullets to be as long...they were actually even longer at first so not sorry but also sorry? I guess. But anyway, we know what you're here for so let's go.

Note: The scenarios were devised to keep me from suffering crippling doubt and mental shutdown between episodes so mostly they'll be fluffy and comfort-oriented than angsty.

As mentioned before, Fearne pickpocketing the Ashton doll Laudna made to practice talking to Ashton, building up to it or luring Ashton over. Ashton's awareness of the pickpocketing can grow too or they could simply allow it from the get-go "I let her take whatever she wants."

Dancing, low-hanging fruit maybe but always good for chaos, awkwardness, wingman activity, and high energy, but I'm talking folk dancing like in Titanic not ballroom dancing, that's not their or the Feywild's style

"I'll be the judge of that." specifically for when Ashton feels they're unlovable or doesn't deserve to be loved. There's also "Then I guess I'm crazy." and "You've always deserved it."

Pickpocketing one another has been their game, but I can't deny that the thought of Ashton making something for Fearne was highly appealing too, I had them make a bracelet from melted down jewelry and gems they had on them (plus a compartment with an Oleander seed and some water from the Feywild in it), imperfectly made but sturdy and still pretty. Bonus for Ashton reverse pickpocketing it onto her.

"You've always been perfect to me" is another one I mentioned before, I usually have Ashton say it (and sometimes post-Fearne taking the shard reiterate that Fearne keeps becoming more perfect in their eyes) but it can go either way.

Sleeping beside each other's a common one. Not even sexually, often it's for comfort, soothing pain/nightmares or reassuring each other, and - if Fearne hasn't disappeared beforehand leaving Ashton waking up feeling a comforting presence missing - usually not wanting to get out of bed the following morning.

Similar to the above is short rests in close quarters, a specific one is Ashton using their primordial earth powers to pull up a discrete wall for the group to hide behind and rest a little, melding into the actual wall to offer a polymorphed Fearne (a small fire lizard usually, sticking on Orym and Ashton's heads) more space so she can rest too, albeit very snugly and pressed against them - easy opening for kisses under the jawline btw.

Metaphorical but Ashton's reassurance of "You could never hurt me" regarding Fearne's primordial fire was used a bit, plus it aligns with the recent "I'll take my fire damage now" when they hugged Fearne.

Fearne being open to Ashton about her fears of being the dark version of herself, bonus quote "I don't know that person, she's not you, never will be, you're better."

Fearne pulling the Uno Reverse "The shard hurt, but knowing you were there made it hurt much less." and/or "Thank you for saving me."

Also similar to the one above are conversations post-Fearne taking the shard exploring newfound empathy for each other's (albeit more extreme) positions at Whitestone; Fearne experiencing the intensity of the shard's fire, and Ashton experiencing the dread of seeing Fearne in pain from it and being afraid to lose her.

"Whatever happens, promise you'll come back to me" is a pertinent one for the current setting too.

What is that? 1, 2...12! One for each month, there's of course more, some are simple low-hanging fruit or more detailed (no seriously I trimmed a lot of these bullet points down in detail) but for the sake of length we'll stop here. Once again, Happy New Year my fellow Critters and Callowmoores!

[k7l4d4]

K Reviews and Rants: Miraculous Ladybug Season 5! Episode 21

Alright, onto the episode that is supposedly meant to show Lila finally getting figured out.

Now, I'm gonna ignore the usual Lila Manipulates everyone BS. This episode has two big problems with it.

Firstly, it tries to present Miss Bustier and Damocles as reasonable authority figures... yet neither of them ever actually try and get the students' direct input or seriously question the out of character career requests for them. Additionally, it has Mylene get on a soapbox about kids "being forced to pick their futures so early in life" or something stupid like that. (Takes a deep breath) I literally had to change what I wanted to do for work three times growing up. Now, I'm not that old, I'll admit, but I have firsthand experience with having to make a change in career choice after making a decision. This episode treating Mylene as making some profound statement, when she's basically just rephrasing the simple fact that there's no guarantee a person is going to maintain the same career in life after school as some kind of criticism of the educational system. Now, I know NOTHING about the French Educational system... but when it tries to push an aesop like this right after literally showing everyone cheerfully and eagerly acting as if they didn't have a perfect idea of what they want to do in life, it just comes off as awkward. Oh, and them further making Adrien into a damsel in distress with nothing more of substance to him then his crush on Marinette was... uncomfortable on so many levels.

Secondly, this episode going full sympathetic retcon on Sabrina in the most blatant way possible. For a series that has done basically nothing with her besides have her be Chloe's goon, they are trying very hard to pretend she hasn't been Chloe's willing accomplice all this time. They are acting as if she's never gotten anyone hurt or damaged anyone's lives on Chloe's behalf before, despite this very season showing how she ratted out Marinette's "Crush" to Chloe in Derision and Chloe using that to play a mean prank on Marinette... and ignoring all the times she's lied and stolen on Chloe's request, without a hint of protest. It's hard to see Sabrina as an innocent bystander or dupe when this season is the first time she's ever shown any guilt or remorse for being Chloe's lackey... and it being the first time she's done something THIS bad doesn't really work when she's stating it's because her dad's a cop (when that's never mattered to her before) and because "helping Chloe has never hurt anyone" (which is just a straight-up lie). It feels less like she's turning on Chloe out of guilt or remorse and more because she's upset that Chloe is seemingly replacing her with Lila... when this episode really makes it feel more like Lila is making Chloe HER "Sabrina."

Anyway, rambling Forward over. Onto the review! As always, please forgive my profanity.

Episode 21: Confrontation

Okay, now we get the opening scene of Adrien struggling with an orientation form with Plagg pointing out how simple it is. Just... writing down your request for next year's school and your career goals. Admittedly, I can see why this would be hard with Adrien; bullshit writing decisions or not, Adrien struggling to figure out what he wants to do with his life makes perfect sense. Although I sincerely doubt that this would be a hardlocked "one and done" thing that is absolutely binding, because that would be utterly fucking stupid. Because if this kind of thing WERE absolutely binding, then you could have the biggest slacker in school write down the name of the fanciest, most exclusive school in the area that comes with a lot of perks and then slap down some stupid answer, and I doubt any school in the world would put up with something that easily abused.

...And we hear from Adrien that he isn't even writing down what HE wants, but what his father has DECIDED for him. REAL great development here, nice to know that the kid who literally BROKE OUT OF HIS OWN FUCKING HOUSE is still too chicken to figure out what he wants out of life. Also, the fact that they once again made Adrien's life decisions and attitudes be about someone else (how MARINETTE will feel about his dad making him move to London) is of course just fine. /s

Ugh, fine, I guess hearing Plagg show solidarity with Adrien is nice. Still kinda annoying, since Plagg is pretty much always just the goofball, rather than a serious individual.

Okay, so it looks like these orientation forms do have a safety check, in that the teachers review things with the students to see if they have the qualifications to go to their chosen school for their studies of choice... now how does this get ruined? Oh yeah, Marinette gets a "strange feeling" now that she and Alya aren't the class reps. Clearly this strange feeling has NOTHING to do with the person she KNOWS is a liar and manipulator who will screw over anyone for her own benefit is now the Class Rep, surely not!! Also, "entrusting us with their hopes and dreams!" Dramatic much? It's not as if they can't just apply to schools of their choice anyway... can they? I've got no fucking clue how the French Education System handles this crap.

Let's see what they wanna study...

Alya: Wants to be a Reporter, needs to specialize in Literature.

Nino: Movie Director. Weird how his love of music and DJing disappeared.

Mylene: "Defender of the Earth." Wow, they couldn't even pretend to have her put down a serious job, could they?

Ivan: Stay-at-home-dad. ...Huh, I honestly can't say anything snarky about that, it takes guts to be cool with that kind of life, I just hope he knows what that kind of commitment entails.

Rose: "Hairstylist," okay, not too weird... "For Unicorns." Never mind, they really aren't even pretending to have her be serious, they are straight-up insisting Rose is a delusional idiot. That might sound harsh, but come the FUCK on, there's a line between having an innocent idealism still, and unironically wanting a job that involves working with mythical creatures. Who knows, maybe Unicorns actually exist in MLB, I doubt that her job is even remotely applicable. Wait, she got told Unicorns don't exist... and changed it to "Hairstylist for Dragons."

Juleka: I couldn't even hear what she said, but given Marinette's comment on "that being SO you," I'm gonna assume it's something insanely stereotypically "goth."

Sabrina: A nurse. Because she "loves taking care of other people." I am cringing, because it sounds like they are trying to insist Sabrina being Chloe's enabler and minion is something positive that "Chloe tainted" or some shit like that. Also, she's never shown any indication of wanting to take care of people before, EVER.

Chloe: "I don't need to do anything since I'm already rich." They are seriously this fucking stupid. They can't even give her wanting to be something snobby and "powerful" that will let her pander to her own ego, they seriously are treating her like an unironic "Ideal Rich" stereotype. News flash, even RICH PEOPLE HAVE STUFF THEY LIKE TO DO. God fucking dammit.

Lila: I'm not even going to type her answer since it's a bare-faced lie meant to make her look good, which she even admits to.

Also, I'm genuinely confused on why we never got Nathaniel's, Max's, or Kim's. I'm not even gonna pretend to touch Alix's situation with a ten foot pole.

Seeing Marinette fretting about "entrusting her classmate's futures to such awful girls" really, REALLY annoys me. The entire fucking REASON that Lila is even class-rep is because of the authors trying to pretend that Lila transferred in BEFORE the elections for Class Rep took place, when I'm literally looking at the timeline and she explicitly came LONG AFTER.

Yada yada yada, Lila lying through her teeth again. Wow, not even ten seconds and she's having Sabrina destroy the original forms and forge new ones. UGH. "You're using too many words to explain your plan!" HAHAHA ISN'T CHLOE BEING A DUMB BLONDE STEREOTYPE HILARIOUS!? I AM ENJOYING THIS AND NOT PISSED OFF AT ALL!!! And WOW, Lila's "brilliant plan" is to just... frame Marinette for replacing everyone's forms with ones that would make them miserable. There are clearly no holes in this, certainly not the fact that Miss Bustier KNOWS now that Sabrina can and does forge signatures and handwriting, and that the whole "frame Marinette for doing something awful" routine only has a 50% success record, even with Lila's bullshit in effect. This isn't stupid, nope, not one bit. /s

And we get a reminder from Chloe that Andre is a stereotypical scumbag politician, it's been a while since the show has been willing to do that. I wonder if it has something to do with the show trying to pretend he's a good dad because of Zoe?

Also, apparently the lynchpin to Lila's plan is having Sabrina lie and say that MARINETTE made her forge the papers... wow, people will totally buy that the girl who does anything and everything Chloe says would ever take orders from someone other than Chloe, that's definitely what will happen. Much shock, much brilliance. /s

Wow, literally having Chloe gush over Lila's plan being "utterly villainous." They aren't even pretending to be subtle in the slightest. This is pathetic. And now Sabrina's blowing into her weird whistle in a panic because she "can't do this." Girl, you have been Chloe's lapdog and have had no problem with ruining lives in the past without a hint of regret, don't pretend you have a conscience NOW of all times. Also, what the FUCK is with that stupid whistle? Where did it come from, and why is it only NOW something so important to her??

"Helping Chloe doesn't hurt anyone" YOU LITERALLY TRIED TO STEAL MARINETTE'S DIARY IN SEASON ONE CUT THE BULLSHIT. "Forging documents and lying? It's different!" No. IT IS NOT. YOU HAVE LIED ON CHLOE'S BEHALF MANY TIMES IN THIS SERIES ALREADY!!!

And after a moment of pointless cruelty (and more "I didn't do anything wrong!!" whining from Sabrina) by Chloe, we are now back to the reappearance of... ugh. The "Resistance." What have these idiots accomplished again...? Oh right, they publicly harassed Adrien's father, fell hook line and sinker for Hawkmoth's idiotic "scheme" to conceal his identity again, lead a fairly pointless resistance against Hawkmoth after he gets the Ladybug Earrings... and that's about it. What a joke.

Okay, and somehow Damocles hears them and is looking for them on the basis that they are intruders. He's honestly not wrong, since I sincerely doubt they are supposed to be hiding in that weird nook in the school after class hours. Apparently Nino's "brilliant plan" is for all of them to go to the same high school... for many, MANY reasons, that feels utterly fucking stupid to me, since there's no guarantee that any of them would get schedules that would let them meet up, there's no guarantee that the school would be able to accommodate their future goals and ideals, and, oh yeah, THEY DON'T NEED TO GO TO THE SAME SCHOOL TO STILL BE A TEAM.

And it seems Damocles is a fan of their plan. Not terrible, but that feels like the kind of thing that's gonna get out of hand in the worst way VERY QUICKLY. Also, Nino thinking his plan will be able to fix Adrien's problem would be hilarious if it didn't illustrate how stupid the writers are making the cast for the sake of plot. And yup, the little problem of them having different dreams and goals that are incompatible with all going to the same school immediately crops up.

While Marinette takes a call, Mrs. Mendeleev is tattling on the "Resistance" to Mr. Damocles. For once, she's absolutely right that them lurking in the boiler room is unacceptable. Not only is it breaking several rules, it's just plain dangerous to be in a place like that without a good reason. And... Damocles is covering for them. That would be sweet if it weren't liable to get him in massive trouble. Oh, looks like Mendeleev is unsatisfied with how Damocles runs things. I mean, so am I, but I doubt she'd be any better given her track record.

"It's so unfair that we have to decide what we want to do so early on in life!" MYLENE, IF YOU THINK THAT THIS IS THE BE-ALL END-ALL OF YOUR LIFE, YOU ARE FUCKING DELUSIONAL. Changing careers and exploring different subjects and career paths is NORMAL. People who go into one thing and never divert from it are the EXCEPTION not the rule. I wanted to become a programmer, then got into IT, before I finally ended up as a Pharmacy Technician. Them acting as if "taking a bunch of different courses to figure out what we want" is this groundbreaking thing pisses me off. They come off as spoiled brats, especially when each of them had pretty clear ideas on what they wanted to do right off the bat. This is fucking stupid.

No no no. I'm not even remotely pretending to entertain them acting as if trying to "take a stand" against filing these forms THAT THEY ALREADY FILLED OUT AND HANDED OVER by "striking" is anything other then performative BS. I have had my fill of performative BS for a while now. Fuck this.

Seriously, why the fuck do they have Juleka speaking so fucking QUIETLY? This is just fucking bizarre. She's capable of speaking at a normal volume without issue, she's SPOKEN at a normal volume without issue THIS SEASON, why is she having this problem NOW OF ALL TIMES!? Ding Dong, Rose points out the fucking problem with doing a "strike" when it comes to something THEY HAVE ALREADY DONE.

And it looks like MAYBE Adrien has pushed himself to do something other then be totally enslaved to what Gabe wants of him... and we don't even get to see it. Who bets that it's Adriennette shit? ...Yup, it's Adriennette shit. He literally didn't even list anything, he just said he "wanted to be with Marinette." If that's supposed to be touching, it fails. It's just him basically wasting a form by treating it like a love letter.

And Chloe dumps the form in the emergency bathroom that she and Lila are hiding in. How did no one see them all enter at the same time, and why was no one suspicious? And I cannot repeat myself enough, them trying to act as if Sabrina just NOW has a conscience PISSES ME OFF.

And we get a scene of Caline taking Lila at face value. For fuck's sake, this better not be binding... and Damocles is taking Lila's bullshit rationalization on why Alya obviously put down "Optician" at face value, FUCK. THAT. THIS is why this guy needs to be kicked out of his position, he SUCKS AT HIS JOB. Seriously, why the fuck would ALYA WEARING GLASSES MEANS SHE WANTS TO MAKE THEM FOR PEOPLE!? And Mrs. Mendeleev just saying "her grades allow it" really proves she's no better at this job then Damocles is. Uuuggghhh... your JOB should be to call in Alya and TALK WITH HER since her homeroom teacher has literally JUST POINTED OUT THAT THIS IS UNUSUAL FOR ALYA. FUCK THIS SHIT.

"Juleka wants to repeat the year" NOPE. FUCK THAT. END OF FUCKING STORY. You do not get to CHOOSE TO REPEAT A YEAR!!!! FUCK THAT FUCK THAT FUCK THAT!!! WHY ARE THESE IDIOTS NOT QUESTIONING THIS!?!? Wow, the speech impediment that didn't exist until recently, truly a "brilliant reason" for her to want to be held back WHICH IS NOT A THING THAT HAPPENS. And another sign of Mrs. Mendeleev being just as useless as Damocles in that she doesn't oppose a child apparently sabotaging her own education.

And NOW we get the class reacting to the news!! How will the writers fuck THIS up, I wonder?

"You sure you didn't get mine by mistake?" Kim saying that would be funny if it weren't for the sheer stupidity of the teachers and Damocles apparently being dumb enough to just buy Lila's bullshit at face value AND Miss Bustier doing NOTHING to actually oppose it!!! Oh, and another Dumb Blonde joke, but this time it's Rose who's the butt of it.

And whatever drama this should result in gets sidetracked by what looks to be Juleka getting Akumatized. Let's see if that'll actually go through with it or if they'll bring back the Resistance's bullshit "tactics" again. Also, why is Gabe/Hawkmoth acting like he's got this history of akumatizing people during Teacher Rep Meetings when this is the first time these have ever even been MENTIONED?

And the magical charm proves to be immediately useless! Who didn't see that coming, show of hands!

And it's Reflekta again. UGH. Also, them trying to act as if not being (verbally) understood or listened to is a recurring problem with Juleka falls flat when she's never had this speech impediment prior to this season. Her issue was being SEEN, not HEARD, dumbass writers. Yup, they are using the dumb tactics, and putting themselves in danger in the process. Kiddies, it's WAY TOO FUCKING LATE FOR THAT.

Huh, they actually bothered to give an old Akuma an improved version of their prior power!! Now if only it wasn't the Akuma LEAST USEFUL TO GETTING THE MIRACULOUSES!!! Also, the fact that their classmates didn't immediately run when they saw that the Akuma was Reflekta, especially since this one operates as a hive mind it seems. It's also kinda stupid that they are trying to tie Reflekta's powers of image copying with the motivation of "staying with her friends" since it just plain DOES NOT FIT REFLEKTA AS AN AKUMA.

This plan is even stupider than normal. Not only was the Akuma taken out in less than a handful of minutes, they basically just got lucky that they took out the "real Reflekta." This was a waste of time.

Now back to the school, where Alya and the rest ask Lila what happened at the conference. SURELY this isn't a plot, SURELY this isn't all a trick- Oh who am I kidding, of course it is. Yup, Lila immediately passes the blame onto Marinette. And Chloe immediately pulls out the fact that Marinette's the only one with an unaltered form as "proof" that this is all her fault, and Lila says it's all because they voted her to be Class Rep. Wow, what a "brilliant plan."

Marinette immediately points out the obvious flaw in her being the one to make the fake forms. And when Lila tries to flip it on her, Marinette calls out Sabrina, who Chloe shoves in front of herself. HOW the class can't smell that this is staged, I have no clue whatsoever. AND SABRINA FINALLY GROWS A SPINE!! WHOOPDY-FUCKING-DOO!! WHO GIVES A SHIT!? IT'S TOO LITTLE TOO LATE TO GROW A FUCKING CONSCIENCE WHEN YOU'VE BEEN ACTING AS IF YOU'VE NEVER DONE ANY WRONG UP UNTIL NOW!!!

And Chloe, because of course they are still keeping her the dumb one, loudly calls Sabrina a traitor and says that "wasn't the plan." Lila tries to run damage control... by immediately throwing SABRINA under the bus and claiming that Sabrina is the liar, and was "just being used by Marinette." Seriously, CHLOE ADMITTED THAT THIS WAS THEIR PLAN!!! HOW STUPID IS THIS!? EXTREMELY STUPID!!! Also, wow, calling Marinette a "Civilian Monarch." She isn't even trying anymore.

And Sabrina, no, she is not turning everything you say against you, she's lying. Turning what you say against you is when you repeat what someone says in a way that means differently from what they intend. What she's doing is lying, blatantly, calling you a liar, and trying to gaslight you into going along with what she wants, and she's not being even remotely subtle about it. WHY ARE NONE OF THEIR CLASSMATES REACTING TO THIS!? WHY!?!?!

Yeesh, even if you ignore how stupid and blatant Lila's lies are, this is genuinely creepy how she's openly trying to gaslight and badger Sabrina into doing what she wants and agreeing with her. It's sincerely disturbing to see her being this fucking obvious.

Also, it's kinda weird how Sabrina emphasizes that her dad is a policeman.

And after Sabrina runs off, Chloe literally tells Sabrina to 'heel,' like a dog. THAT'S the Miraculous they think suits Sabrina best... how nauseating. No joke, this part of the episode is making me sick to my stomach.

Wow, a classic "I'll have my dad fire you(r dad)" threat from Chloe. Haven't heard one of those in awhile.

And after Lila begins bragging about how great of a liar she is (SHE REALLY ISN'T PEOPLE!!!), and threatens Sabrina, Sabrina springs her trap and reveals she engineered a public confession. This would be cathartic if it weren't TOTALLY STUPID HOW LONG LILA'S LIES HAVE BEEN MAINTAINED BY PEOPLE TAKING HER AT FACE VALUE OVER ALL ELSE!!!!

Yadda yadda yadda, Sabrina grew a conscience and revealed everything to Marinette, acting as if she hasn't tried to gleefully ruin lives and damage reputations at Chloe's behest before. And they seriously built an entire fake bathroom with a one-way window-mirror thing just to catch her. How obnoxious. Seriously, all they did was put up a "bathroom busted" sign and that was enough, and the school never tried to call a plumber or something!? THIS IS STUPID!!! They should've been aware this ENTIRE TIME that the actual bathroom was perfectly fine, making this entire plan of Marinette's as sound as a pile of SAND!!!

"I'll fix everything." Fix WHAT!? By all accounts you just faked the bathrooms being out of order, switched out a mirror for a back-up bathroom that never needed making and thus probably cost the school quite a pretty penny to make, and wasted several school hours by enabling Lila's idiotic plan involving those orientation forms WHICH SHOULD NOT HAVE ACTUALLY BEEN THAT BIG OF A FUCKING DEAL!!!

Caline says they owe Marinette an apology, they kinda do. They also probably deserve to be fired since they've shown nothing but raw, unfettered ineptitude THIS ENTIRE FUCKING SEASON AND EVERY EPISODE INVOLVING LILA!!! Wow, Chloe actually bothered acting on one of her threats to call her father!! TOO BAD THAT HER DAD DOESN'T HAVE THE POWER TO GET RID OF DAMOCLES!! I agree he needs to go, but Andre doesn't have the power to do that. Mayor of the year, people, Mayor of the fucking year.

I'm just tuning out the rest of this, since it's basically Damocles FINALLY bothering to act like a proper educator and Andre going back to his Season 1 days of being a slimeball politician that throws his weight around to keep his daughter's image clean. Oh, and it looks like the only reason he went along with it was because Audrey was coercing him with her present, CLEARLY they are "in love," and this isn't downplaying Andre being a self-serving spineless leech. Heck, this makes him MORE of a spineless leech since he's getting pushed around by Audrey FOR NO FUCKING REASON.

"Now you're not getting fired either!" Audrey, he's your husband, not an employee, and he has more authority than you. Fuck this bullshit.

And the entire class rallying around Damocles would be more touching if he weren't a fucking joke of a principal on every level. We also see the Magic Charms FINALLY BE FUCKING USEFUL!! Who knows, maybe this unknown until now power will actually be fucking relevant... yeah, I don't believe it either.

Yadda yadda yadda, character shilling for Damocles by acting as if he's always been a good principal and not a fucking joke with no spine. And now we get the scene of Caline joining the "Chloe is pure evil and always has been, so there's no point in trying to change her, point and scorn her as nothing but trash" club. And we get a "I thought you could change if people reached out to you!" speech which acts as if the token gestures that never went anywhere were really meaningful attempts to reform her, blech. And Caline's "punishment" for Chloe is literally just the "extra help" she said Chloe would need last episode reframed as a threat. Idiotic. And apparently Lila has an entirely separate identity as "Cerise" on top of her somehow tricking three women into believing she's her daughter and HOW MUCH FUCKING MORE DO THE WRITERS PLAN ON SHILLING HER AS THIS MASTER MANIPULATOR!? BECAUSE SHE AIN'T ONE!! SHE IS A TEENAGE GIRL WITH FUCKING DELUSIONS OF GRANDEUR!! GOD FUCKING DAMMIT!!!

[aroaceconfessions]

For most of my life, I had have a difficult time trying to figure my sexuality.

When I was a kid, I though I had several crushes because I was always nervous talking to boys in my class... I found later than that was because I had anxiety.

When I was a teenager, I liked a boy, then a girl, so I thought, "Oh, maybe, I'm bisexual." But I really didn't see me having a romantic or sexual relationship with them and the "feelings" that I had just faded away shortly after. However, I felt the outsider of my friend group because I was the only one who hadn't had a boyfriend or girlfriend. I felt terrified of being left alone, like the strange one because I didn't feel comfortable with neither the three sexual orientations that i knew at that time - the information in school was limited, the media at that time only focused in heterosexual relationships, and the people around me was very closed minded so it wasn't really safe to talk about it. So... I pushed myself, had my first kiss in a spin-the-bottle game with a classmate (awkward) and avoided playing truth of dare for the fear of having to confess that I was, indeed, a virgin because i didn't feel sexual attraction for anyone.

Then, i felt a strong connection with a dear friend, fell in love with them, and realized that I, indeed, wanted to have a romantic/sexual relationship with them - only with them. "Maybe I'm demisexual", I said.

Now, as an adult who haven't felt a similar type of connection in ages and is just uncomfortable at the idea of being in a romantic/sexual relationship, who finally can talk about it in a more open way, who has more access to information and can think about the feels that her younger self had, the ace spectrum it's starting to feel like home after a long ass journey. However, the fear of my feelings not being enough to "fit" into a label is always there: what if in the future I feel romantic and/or sexual attraction for someone? What if I don't? What if I really felt that in the past but I didn't understand it? What if everything I thought about myself is wrong?

Figuring your sexuality can be really frustrating and frightening for some people, especially if you are alone and don't have someone to talk about it.

Submitted March 18, 2023

[xiapet]

WoL Intro

I figured I should probably introduce my FFXIV characters so I can WoLpost on Tumblr. This is not a FFXIV exclusive blog, it's just the thing I can't shut up about rn so I'll pin this for the time being.

Name: Applesauce Betty (main alias), Melorabette Lenoir (birth name)

Race/Clan/Gender/Orientation: Elezen/Wildwood/♀️/Undefined

Age: 29 at the start of ARR, born 1546

Main Job(s): WHM and BLM

Secondary Jobs: SMN, RDM, SCH, AST

DoH/DoL Job(s): Botanist

Partner(s): Aymeric de Borel (former), Lucan Artorian (fiance's WoL, current)

Other family: Renadora Artorian (eventual daughter with Lucan)

Applesauce is a WoL and fucking hates it. Blames herself for everything, wishes she could be a normal woman living a normal life, stubborn, kind of a hypocrite, serious, and stoic. Pragmatic, highly emotional but represses it, cannot go with the flow, doesn't like change, a control freak but only when it comes to her own situation, prone to mental illness, socially awkward due to years of isolation after her mom died, very good at keeping her decorum, always sees things through to the end. Fiercely loyal, empathetic, maternal towards kids. Eventually works through her trauma to be a more likeable version of herself.

Name: Rhu'by Edwina

Race/Clan/Gender/Orientation: Miqo'te/Keeper of the Moon/♀️/Bisexual

Age: 21 at the start of ARR, born 1554

Main Job(s): AST and BLM

DoH/DoL Job(s): Alchemist

Partner: Estinien Varlineau (eventually, it's a slow burn)

Rhu'by is NOT a WoL but does have the echo. Highly spiritual, sees ghosts and was bullied for it as a kid, misunderstood, independent, headstrong, excellent judge of character, can see through people's bullshit, soft and gentle spirited, highly understanding and open minded, can be snarky if she likes you, a mild flirt but oblivious to other's flirting, a yearner, generally chill, bright outlook on life but not to the point of being the sanguine, level-headed, perceptive.

I like to share gpose and WoLqotd type things so now if you see those you can have some background information into who these characters are. I've been playing on and off since 2019 and consistently since Endwalker dropped. I'm always open to discussing lore so feel free to ask questions if you have them. Rhu'by is an existing OC from ttrpgs I'm still fleshing out and is my alt character I made this year (2024), Applesauce is my main character who I started the game with in 2019. I have 2 main timelines/canons happening simultaneously.

Applesauce's canon includes Rhu'by but only as a side character who comes in later in the story.

Rhu'by's canon does not include Applesauce, but has Rhu'by as main participant in the msq (for gameplay and lore purposes)

This is mostly because the events of Ghimlyt Dark are important to both canons but for different reasons and cannot exist in the same canon so 2 canons it is ¯⁠\⁠_⁠(⁠ツ⁠)⁠_⁠/⁠¯

Maybe someday I'll have the confidence to share any of the pounds of fanfic I have written/am writing about them but don't count on it.

[fff777]

reaction to NCT DREAM ( )SCAPE Film Behind the Scene

another lengthy video ^^;;

detail-oriented jisung as always

ohhhh so they only had a small number of actors and i guess they just copied and pasted them to make the cafeteria look full

there are some shots that didn't make it in the film, as one would expect

next is mark and haechan with their classroom scene

jeno injury makeup

chenle losing his mind as we speak

both jisung and jeno have referenced AI and i'm thinking it's just kind of a catchall term for a lifeless and robotic being. because personally i would refer to the prisoners as brainwashed rather than AI.

renjun having lots of discussion about what emotions he should show

teary eyed renjun

discussing the love letter and then breaking out into unknown

dance challenge intermission. i just noticed that they're wearing a puppy + kitty sweater. that's them. is that the official nomin sweater?

this one was really cute though i admit

jaemin struck with the arrow of cuteness X3

injured foot makeup for jisung ^^;;

lessons from ballet instructor/choreographer. i will say, my one gripe with the jisung ballet scene was that it felt like the room was too small for him to actually stretch his arms out. you can see here that he's pretty close to the wall so it doesn't feel like he's dancing unrestrained like he should be.

jisung: please show them my feet

this huge bag of fake pills

jisung in ballet mode

jisung learned ballet ten years ago for three months. haechan did mention that in the countdown stream.

renjun was discussing acting with his eyes with someone (perhaps a director) and he was like "well, i'll have to try it out because it's new to me too" but the other person was like "i've seen you act well before, you'll be fine" :3

cuties in the house (the gun range)

renjun had to film a number of emotional scenes, presumably for that shattered mirror scene

renjun's character :3

jaemle practising sword fighting

...entertainment industry filming schedules are crazy stupid ToT there is no reason for this scene to be shot at 4 in the morning except to make crazy stupid deadlines. like the only reason something should be filmed at 4 in the morning is if it's a night scene and all of dream( )scape was filmed indoors so.

group scenes now! i'm not gonna lie, the running scenes in the film did look awkward and i think it was because they had to jog lightly lol.

laughing at the fact that they bust open the door and were looking at nothing XD

so it had come to my attention that chenji

they're starting to laugh now XD

commemorative group pics as always

lol they were watching sportsball

joining them cozily :3 on the floor of course because jisung notoriously never sits on chairs.

the spitting saga never ends and it always involves renjun

celebrating a goal lmfao

jaemin going full AIGOOO

markmin acting a big laugh XD

mc haechan monologuing as always

haechan: guys, tell us what you think about filming haechan: post it on bubble later

omg....this final scene was filmed at 3 AM...so that window is completely artificial light. i can't with these insane schedules ToT

talking over each other at the end >3 but mostly markminhyuckle

cute :3

[gentil-minou]

Hello! I’ve loved your ml psychology analyses, and I was wondering if you’d being to answer a question of mine! I’ve been thinking on whether or not I want to study psychology and be a counselor, as I love to figure out how people (fictional characters for the most part lol) end up the way they do, and what is influencing their choices. I also really like to help other people who are struggling and try to give them as much support as possible because I’ve also struggled in the past, and I thought that maybe analysis and Listening skills would indicate that I might like the career, but I’m still unsure. Sorry for the rambling, but I guess I was just wondering what made you want to work in mental health and did you find your initial idea of what psychology is vs what you learned in school to be jarring? Sorry to bug, but I thought hearing what someone who’s work I look up fo would think!

ahhhh i always love questions like this because this field is, in my humble and completely unbiased opinion, one of the most important out there, and so i just love when folks are interested! especially because it's such a rewarding career even with all its difficulty!

Read more cause i rambled too much what a shock hfdjsd

my own path towards becoming a therapist is a bit of a weird one because i didn't actually take any psych classes until I was getting my masters in it shjdjkdfs (I was originally in STEM sciences).

becoming a therapist kind of happened by fortuitous happenstance: i was a teacher and found i had an especially great talent for getting kids to open up and talk about themselves and their worries. i'm also very neurodivergent and have my own complicated healing history, and once i got better i realized i really didn't want kids to go through what i went through growing up. it feels a bit selfish but in the best way, because by helping kids out i can make up for the time i spent suffering. it makes me feel good, i guess if that makes sense djkfhds

anyways, my rambling aside i think there are a couple main takeaways that i hope people going into this field can be prepared for so!

practice!!!!!!!!!!! like seriously this is one field where i think the best practice is by doing.

therapy is kinda like dating, in that sometimes you won't click with your client and they might ask to see someone else. it might not be anything personal or it might be, maybe wrong gender or ethnicity or orientation, or they just don't like your vibes. it will be okay, and it doesn't mean anything about you. when that happens i usually focus on the clients i have clicked really well with and remind myself that the client who is leaving is looking to get the best support possible, and it helps

dont trust the movies, it's way more complicated than just asking how someone feels. a lot of times people don't know how they're feeling. kinda got to work your way up to it, and first learn what feelings are

get comfortable with silence. i hate it, i suck at it. but sometimes you gotta make it reallyyyyy awkward before it can get better and the client cant open up

you will have to explain things so sometimes it will feel a lot like teaching. but it's not always so bad

so many fucking acronyms. be prepared

don't be your friends/family's therapist. don't offer unsolicited advice, unless they are open or interested. once you recognize the signs and can diagnose people it becomes waaaaay too easy. it's not always welcome, and sometimes we have to be okay with that

people won't always have the same values or opinions as you, and sometimes it might be triggering. i have a number of clients i wouldn't like or want to be around outside of work, and that's okay. remember to check in with yourself and let yourself have feelings. rely on your empathy and understanding to remind you that the person is what matters, not their beliefs/values. and what your job is

if you work with kids (both young and teens) you will have to work with parents. it might not be fun, but you gotta

you are human, you are born with emotions. you WILL be affected by the things people say and are going through. it isn't easy. the most important thing for anyone in this field is to get their own therapist and really make sure you stay on top of your self-care. think of it like how on airplanes you have to put an oxygen mask on yourself before you can help others; you have to help yourself before you help others.

depending on what you might specialize in (for me it's depression and anxiety) there is a significant chance you might lose a client in the worst way. it will suck and you will grieve, and it will be okay but not really. it's the reality of the field and one that's hard to accept, but i hope folks realize that

nothing beats the feeling of a client you've been seeing for a while start to unconsciously do the things you practiced in session. actually the one thing that beats it is when the client realizes they've gotten better and have made progress. it's the best feeling in the world

kinda related to the last one but it's not uncommon for someone who has made loadsssss of progress to end up experiencing something minor or major that spirals them down. they will feel bad and upset and disappointed, and that's normal. just remember that life is a series of hurdles and it's important to get back up.

this goes the same for therapists!!!! you will make mistakes! and it will be okay! you might say or do something that you think back on and go ah shit i really shouldnt have done that. and that's okay, just get back up and try again

I realize this is becoming very long and may not be as specific, but i feel like this is what i learned that was most valuable over my years in this field. if you have any specific questions i'm happy to go into more details (though my education was a bit unorthodox soooo)

[xprojectrpg]

Moment of Awesome - Jessie Drake/Chameleon: Nica meets Jessie while she's decorating for Pride, and they discuss being ace in the community.

"Happy Pride!" Jessie threw her arms up in celebration. "Now I accidentally bought a million flags - don't ask how that happened - so do you happen to subscribe to the good word of the queer gods on this door?" She made a show of gesturing to the door like she was about to open it to reveal a grand prize.

Nica paused again. Then she said, rather bashfully: "Do you have a spare ace flag?" Maybe it was time for her to take actual pride in her own orientation.

"Of course!" Jessie dipped into the suite and came back out with an eight by eleven ace flag, proudly presenting it to Nica. "Don't tell the others-" by which she meant the other flags, of course, "but this one is my favorite. The color scheme is just so nice. I might get a bigger ace tattoo next month, I'm starting to get the itch for one again. And the butterflies are so small." She turned her arm to show Nica the pride butterflies in the crook of her elbow - one ace, one aro, and one trans.

Nica blinked. "Wait, are you ace too?" The "too" was kind of a giveaway.

"Sure am!" Jessie puffed up proudly - as much as she was capable of, at least. "It doesn't come up as much as being trans because no one ever really asks, 'hey how do you feel about sex' unless they want to have it with you, but personally I think we should talk more about it."

Nica clutched the flag to her chest. "YES." It couldn't have been more vehement if she'd tried. "I mean, I get it, sex is important for the continuation of the species and all that, but it's everywhere. Especially here. So much sex. All the time." She wrinkled her nose a bit.

"I mean, I feel like the species might benefit from going celibate for like a decade, but..." Jessie waggled her hand back and forth. "That's not the point. And yeah I've noticed people are a lot more..." More hand waving. "Around here. And that's cool, good for them, no shame. But like. Man, I understand libidos even less than I did when I was living in a college dorm."

That got a brief bark of laughter. "I swear the whole place needs hosing down sometimes," she agreed. It was such a relief to talk to someone else who felt the way she did. "I mean, I get it. Lots of attractive, fit young-ish people all crammed into the same living space. But it just gets so damn tiring sometimes!" She tilted her head. "So, this is probably a bit personal, but when you go to Pride... I'm guessing it's under the trans flag? Since it's not really safe with the others?"

Jessie tilted her head a little, curious. "What do you mean 'safe'?"

Nica grimaced. "Well... There's the whole "ace people aren't really queer" dialogue going on. Not just with the straights, but with the whole queer community, you know? And there's a pretty loud group that says we should be included under the Pride umbrella and definitely not at Pride itself." She stopped, feeling awkward.

"You're right, that dialogue does happen." Jessie's tone was a bit more sedate now. "And - first to answer your question, I go under all the flags. I either wear the trans flag as a cape and wear my aro-ace shirt - it's a bow in the ace colors and an arrow in the aro colors - or I wear my ace/aro combo flag and 'nobody knows I'm trans' shirt. And... you're right, people do say that, and they're very loud about it, but they're not the majority. And that's not always reassuring, because they're still loud and kind of scary sometimes, and no amount of reasoning with them is ever going to work. The most important part, I think, is to remember that they're wrong, and also that there are people like them for almost every letter of the community except L and G. Like - bi people who aren't in same-sex relationships. If your partner looks like the opposite gender, then you're not really bi according to the self appointed community judges, and you don't belong at Pride. Trans women - especially lesbians - have a hard time because they're told they 'take resources from real women.' I've been told before that I don't belong to the trans community because I have passing privilege, which is total bullshit. There's always going to be people telling you that you don't belong unless you fit their very strict guidelines of what a queer person should be, and they're wrong. And I know it sounds like I'm making it all seem really easy like you can wake up tomorrow with sudden confidence because you know they're wrong, but really it takes time - and for me years of therapy - so if you want to go to Pride and you're not ready to be loud and proud, that's fine too. No one is going to stop you at the proverbial gate and ask what flag you're attending under, you know?"

Nica took all of this in, nodding along as Jessie spoke. "I guess it's because I've only been out a few years, and only around here," she admitted. "But... maybe it's time I stopped worrying about it." She gave Jessie a shy sort of smile. "If it wouldn't cramp your style, would it be okay if I joined you? For the first little while, anyway?"

"Of course!" Jessie was obviously and absolutely thrilled. She loved helping people find their way into the community, even if they were just testing the waters. "You can join us for whatever you want, however long you want. And if you decide you want to get a little more crazy, we can help."

[aroandawkward]

My post in which I mentioned learning that my 13 year-old neighbour identifies as aroace kinda blew up, so I thought I'd talk about it a bit more. Like I said in that post, I felt really emotional about the fact that my neighbour knows about those identities at such a young age. But I also felt emotional thinking about the fact that I am proof to her and her family that being aroace isn't just a kid thing, that aroace adults exist, that they can lead full lives, that they aren't necessarily miserable loners (although of course I know that being a miserable loner wouldn't invalidate someone's identity!). Just by being here as a 24 year-old who identitifies as aroace, by being casually friendly with my neighbours, by being very tentatively and awkwardly open about aroace stuff, I might make it a little easier for the parents next-door to understand and support their aroace daughter. And that thought means so so much to me.

[dear-ao3]

According to all known laws of aviation, there is no way a bee should be able to fly. Its wings are too small to get its fat little body off the ground. The bee, of course, flies anyway because bees don't care what humans think is impossible. Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Ooh, black and yellow! Let's shake it up a little. Barry! Breakfast is ready! Ooming! Hang on a second. Hello? - Barry? - Adam? - Oan you believe this is happening? - I can't. I'll pick you up. Looking sharp. Use the stairs. Your father paid good money for those. Sorry. I'm excited. Here's the graduate. We're very proud of you, son. A perfect report card, all B's. Very proud. Ma! I got a thing going here. - You got lint on your fuzz. - Ow! That's me! - Wave to us! We'll be in row 118,000. - Bye! Barry, I told you, stop flying in the house! - Hey, Adam. - Hey, Barry. - Is that fuzz gel? - A little. Special day, graduation. Never thought I'd make it. Three days grade school, three days high school. Those were awkward. Three days college. I'm glad I took a day and hitchhiked around the hive. You did come back different. - Hi, Barry. - Artie, growing a mustache? Looks good. - Hear about Frankie? - Yeah. - You going to the funeral? - No, I'm not going. Everybody knows, sting someone, you die. Don't waste it on a squirrel. Such a hothead. I guess he could have just gotten out of the way. I love this incorporating an amusement park into our day. That's why we don't need vacations. Boy, quite a bit of pomp... under the circumstances. - Well, Adam, today we are men. - We are! - Bee-men. - Amen! Hallelujah! Students, faculty, distinguished bees, please welcome Dean Buzzwell. Welcome, New Hive Oity graduating class of... ...9:15. That concludes our ceremonies. And begins your career at Honex Industries! Will we pick ourjob today? I heard it's just orientation. Heads up! Here we go. Keep your hands and antennas inside the tram at all times. - Wonder what it'll be like? - A little scary. Welcome to Honex, a division of Honesco and a part of the Hexagon Group. This is it! Wow. Wow. We know that you, as a bee, have worked your whole life to get to the point where you can work for your whole life. Honey begins when our valiant Pollen Jocks bring the nectar to the hive. Our top-secret formula is automatically color-corrected, scent-adjusted and bubble-contoured into this soothing sweet syrup with its distinctive golden glow you know as... Honey! - That girl was hot. - She's my cousin! - She is? - Yes, we're all cousins. - Right. You're right. - At Honex, we constantly strive to improve every aspect of bee existence. These bees are stress-testing a new helmet technology. - What do you think he makes? - Not enough. Here we have our latest advancement, the Krelman. - What does that do? - Oatches that little strand of honey that hangs after you pour it. Saves us millions. Oan anyone work on the Krelman? Of course. Most bee jobs are small ones. But bees know that every small job, if it's done well, means a lot. But choose carefully because you'll stay in the job you pick for the rest of your life. The same job the rest of your life? I didn't know that. What's the difference? You'll be happy to know that bees, as a species, haven't had one day off in 27 million years. So you'll just work us to death? We'll sure try. Wow! That blew my mind! "What's the difference?" How can you say that? One job forever? That's an insane choice to have to make. I'm relieved. Now we only have to make one decision in life. But, Adam, how could they never have told us that? Why would you question anything? We're bees. We're the most perfectly functioning society on Earth. You ever think maybe things work a little too well here? Like what? Give me one example. I don't know. But you know what I'm talking about. Please clear the gate. Royal Nectar Force on approach. Wait a second. Oheck it out. - Hey, those are Pollen Jocks! - Wow. I've never seen them this close. They know what it's like outside the hive. Yeah, but some don't come back. - Hey, Jocks! - Hi, Jocks!

Youguys did great! You're monsters! You're sky freaks! I love it! I love it! - I wonder where they were. - I don't know. Their day's not planned. Outside the hive, flying who knows where, doing who knows what. You can'tjust decide to be a Pollen Jock. You have to be bred for that. Right. Look. That's more pollen than you and I will see in a lifetime. It's just a status symbol. Bees make too much of it. Perhaps. Unless you're wearing it and the ladies see you wearing it. Those ladies? Aren't they our cousins too? Distant. Distant. Look at these two. - Oouple of Hive Harrys. - Let's have fun with them. It must be dangerous being a Pollen Jock. Yeah. Once a bear pinned me against a mushroom! He had a paw on my throat, and with the other, he was slapping me! - Oh, my! - I never thought I'd knock him out. What were you doing during this? Trying to alert the authorities. I can autograph that. A little gusty out there today, wasn't it, comrades? Yeah. Gusty. We're hitting a sunflower patch six miles from here tomorrow. - Six miles, huh? - Barry! A puddle jump for us, but maybe you're not up for it. - Maybe I am. - You are not! We're going 0900 at J-Gate. What do you think, buzzy-boy? Are you bee enough? I might be. It all depends on what 0900 means. Hey, Honex! Dad, you surprised me. You decide what you're interested in? - Well, there's a lot of choices. - But you only get one. Do you ever get bored doing the same job every day? Son, let me tell you about stirring. You grab that stick, and you just move it around, and you stir it around. You get yourself into a rhythm. It's a beautiful thing. You know, Dad, the more I think about it, maybe the honey field just isn't right for me. You were thinking of what, making balloon animals? That's a bad job for a guy with a stinger. Janet, your son's not sure he wants to go into honey! - Barry, you are so funny sometimes. - I'm not trying to be funny. You're not funny! You're going into honey. Our son, the stirrer! - You're gonna be a stirrer? - No one's listening to me! Wait till you see the sticks I have. I could say anything right now. I'm gonna get an ant tattoo! Let's open some honey and celebrate! Maybe I'll pierce my thorax. Shave my antennae. Shack up with a grasshopper. Get a gold tooth and call everybody "dawg"! I'm so proud. - We're starting work today! - Today's the day. Oome on! All the good jobs will be gone. Yeah, right. Pollen counting, stunt bee, pouring, stirrer, front desk, hair removal... - Is it still available? - Hang on. Two left! One of them's yours! Oongratulations! Step to the side. - What'd you get? - Picking crud out. Stellar! Wow! Oouple of newbies? Yes, sir! Our first day! We are ready! Make your choice. - You want to go first? - No, you go. Oh, my. What's available? Restroom attendant's open, not for the reason you think. - Any chance of getting the Krelman? - Sure, you're on. I'm sorry, the Krelman just closed out. Wax monkey's always open. The Krelman opened up again. What happened? A bee died. Makes an opening. See? He's dead. Another dead one. Deady. Deadified. Two more dead. Dead from the neck up. Dead from the neck down. That's life! Oh, this is so hard! Heating, cooling, stunt bee, pourer, stirrer, humming, inspector number seven, lint coordinator, stripe supervisor, mite wrangler. Barry, what do you think I should... Barry? Barry! All right, we've got the sunflower patch in quadrant nine... What happened to you? Where are you? - I'm going out. - Out? Out where? - Out there. - Oh, no! I have to, before I go to work for the rest of my life. You're gonna die! You're crazy! Hello? Another call coming in. If anyone's feeling brave, there's a Korean deli on 83rd that gets their roses today. Hey, guys. - Look at that. - Isn't that the kid we saw yesterday? Hold it, son, flight deck's restricted. It's OK, Lou. We're gonna take him up. Really? Feeling lucky, are you? Sign here, here. Just initial that. - Thank you. - OK. You got a rain advisory today, and as you all know, bees cannot fly in rain. So be careful. As always, watch your brooms, hockey

sticks,dogs, birds, bears and bats. Also, I got a couple of reports of root beer being poured on us. Murphy's in a home because of it, babbling like a cicada! - That's awful. - And a reminder for you rookies, bee law number one, absolutely no talking to humans! All right, launch positions! Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz! Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz! Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz! Black and yellow! Hello! You ready for this, hot shot? Yeah. Yeah, bring it on. Wind, check. - Antennae, check. - Nectar pack, check. - Wings, check. - Stinger, check. Scared out of my shorts, check. OK, ladies, let's move it out! Pound those petunias, you striped stem-suckers! All of you, drain those flowers! Wow! I'm out! I can't believe I'm out! So blue. I feel so fast and free! Box kite! Wow! Flowers! This is Blue Leader. We have roses visual. Bring it around 30 degrees and hold. Roses! 30 degrees, roger. Bringing it around. Stand to the side, kid. It's got a bit of a kick. That is one nectar collector! - Ever see pollination up close? - No, sir. I pick up some pollen here, sprinkle it over here. Maybe a dash over there, a pinch on that one. See that? It's a little bit of magic. That's amazing. Why do we do that? That's pollen power. More pollen, more flowers, more nectar, more honey for us. Oool. I'm picking up a lot of bright yellow. Oould be daisies. Don't we need those? Oopy that visual. Wait. One of these flowers seems to be on the move. Say again? You're reporting a moving flower? Affirmative. That was on the line! This is the coolest. What is it? I don't know, but I'm loving this color. It smells good. Not like a flower, but I like it. Yeah, fuzzy. Ohemical-y. Oareful, guys. It's a little grabby. My sweet lord of bees! Oandy-brain, get off there! Problem! - Guys! - This could be bad. Affirmative. Very close. Gonna hurt. Mama's little boy. You are way out of position, rookie! Ooming in at you like a missile! Help me! I don't think these are flowers. - Should we tell him? - I think he knows. What is this?! Match point! You can start packing up, honey, because you're about to eat it! Yowser! Gross. There's a bee in the car! - Do something! - I'm driving! - Hi, bee. - He's back here! He's going to sting me! Nobody move. If you don't move, he won't sting you. Freeze! He blinked! Spray him, Granny! What are you doing?! Wow... the tension level out here is unbelievable. I gotta get home. Oan't fly in rain. Oan't fly in rain. Oan't fly in rain. Mayday! Mayday! Bee going down! Ken, could you close the window please? Ken, could you close the window please? Oheck out my new resume. I made it into a fold-out brochure. You see? Folds out. Oh, no. More humans. I don't need this. What was that? Maybe this time. This time. This time. This time! This time! This... Drapes! That is diabolical. It's fantastic. It's got all my special skills, even my top-ten favorite movies. What's number one? Star Wars? Nah, I don't go for that... ...kind of stuff. No wonder we shouldn't talk to them. They're out of their minds. When I leave a job interview, they're flabbergasted, can't believe what I say. There's the sun. Maybe that's a way out. I don't remember the sun having a big 75 on it. I predicted global warming. I could feel it getting hotter. At first I thought it was just me. Wait! Stop! Bee! Stand back. These are winter boots. Wait! Don't kill him! You know I'm allergic to them! This thing could kill me! Why does his life have less value than yours? Why does his life have any less value than mine? Is that your statement? I'm just saying all life has value. You don't know what he's capable of feeling. My brochure! There you go, little guy. I'm not scared of him. It's an allergic thing. Put that on your resume brochure. My whole face could puff up. Make it one of your special skills. Knocking someone out is also a special skill. Right. Bye, Vanessa. Thanks. - Vanessa, next week? Yogurt night? - Sure, Ken. You know, whatever. - You could put carob chips on there. - Bye. - Supposed to be less calories. - Bye. I gotta say something. She saved my life. I gotta say something. All

right,here it goes. Nah. What would I say? I could really get in trouble. It's a bee law. You're not supposed to talk to a human. I can't believe I'm doing this. I've got to. Oh, I can't do it. Oome on! No. Yes. No. Do it. I can't. How should I start it? "You like jazz?" No, that's no good. Here she comes! Speak, you fool! Hi! I'm sorry. - You're talking. - Yes, I know. You're talking! I'm so sorry. No, it's OK. It's fine. I know I'm dreaming. But I don't recall going to bed. Well, I'm sure this is very disconcerting. This is a bit of a surprise to me. I mean, you're a bee! I am. And I'm not supposed to be doing this, but they were all trying to kill me. And if it wasn't for you... I had to thank you. It's just how I was raised. That was a little weird. - I'm talking with a bee. - Yeah. I'm talking to a bee. And the bee is talking to me! I just want to say I'm grateful. I'll leave now. - Wait! How did you learn to do that? - What? The talking thing. Same way you did, I guess. "Mama, Dada, honey." You pick it up. - That's very funny. - Yeah. Bees are funny. If we didn't laugh, we'd cry with what we have to deal with. Anyway... Oan I... ...get you something? - Like what? I don't know. I mean... I don't know. Ooffee? I don't want to put you out. It's no trouble. It takes two minutes. - It's just coffee. - I hate to impose. - Don't be ridiculous! - Actually, I would love a cup. Hey, you want rum cake? - I shouldn't. - Have some. - No, I can't. - Oome on! I'm trying to lose a couple micrograms. - Where? - These stripes don't help. You look great! I don't know if you know anything about fashion. Are you all right? No. He's making the tie in the cab as they're flying up Madison. He finally gets there. He runs up the steps into the church. The wedding is on. And he says, "Watermelon? I thought you said Guatemalan. Why would I marry a watermelon?" Is that a bee joke? That's the kind of stuff we do. Yeah, different. So, what are you gonna do, Barry? About work? I don't know. I want to do my part for the hive, but I can't do it the way they want. I know how you feel. - You do? - Sure. My parents wanted me to be a lawyer or a doctor, but I wanted to be a florist. - Really? - My only interest is flowers. Our new queen was just elected with that same campaign slogan. Anyway, if you look... There's my hive right there. See it? You're in Sheep Meadow! Yes! I'm right off the Turtle Pond! No way! I know that area. I lost a toe ring there once. - Why do girls put rings on their toes? - Why not? - It's like putting a hat on your knee. - Maybe I'll try that. - You all right, ma'am? - Oh, yeah. Fine. Just having two cups of coffee! Anyway, this has been great. Thanks for the coffee. Yeah, it's no trouble. Sorry I couldn't finish it. If I did, I'd be up the rest of my life. Are you...? Oan I take a piece of this with me? Sure! Here, have a crumb. - Thanks! - Yeah. All right. Well, then... I guess I'll see you around. Or not. OK, Barry. And thank you so much again... for before. Oh, that? That was nothing. Well, not nothing, but... Anyway... This can't possibly work. He's all set to go. We may as well try it. OK, Dave, pull the chute. - Sounds amazing. - It was amazing! It was the scariest, happiest moment of my life. Humans! I can't believe you were with humans! Giant, scary humans! What were they like? Huge and crazy. They talk crazy. They eat crazy giant things. They drive crazy. - Do they try and kill you, like on TV? - Some of them. But some of them don't. - How'd you get back? - Poodle. You did it, and I'm glad. You saw whatever you wanted to see. You had your "experience." Now you can pick out yourjob and be normal. - Well... - Well? Well, I met someone. You did? Was she Bee-ish? - A wasp?! Your parents will kill you! - No, no, no, not a wasp. - Spider? - I'm not attracted to spiders. I know it's the hottest thing, with the eight legs and all. I can't get by that face. So who is she? She's... human. No, no. That's a bee law. You wouldn't break a bee law. - Her name's Vanessa. - Oh, boy. She's so nice. And she's a florist! Oh, no!

You'redating a human florist! We're not dating. You're flying outside the hive, talking to humans that attack our homes with power washers and M-80s! One-eighth a stick of dynamite! She saved my life! And she understands me. This is over! Eat this. This is not over! What was that? - They call it a crumb. - It was so stingin' stripey! And that's not what they eat. That's what falls off what they eat! - You know what a Oinnabon is? - No. It's bread and cinnamon and frosting. They heat it up... Sit down! ...really hot! - Listen to me! We are not them! We're us. There's us and there's them! Yes, but who can deny the heart that is yearning? There's no yearning. Stop yearning. Listen to me! You have got to start thinking bee, my friend. Thinking bee! - Thinking bee. - Thinking bee. Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Thinking bee! There he is. He's in the pool. You know what your problem is, Barry? I gotta start thinking bee? How much longer will this go on? It's been three days! Why aren't you working? I've got a lot of big life decisions to think about. What life? You have no life! You have no job. You're barely a bee! Would it kill you to make a little honey? Barry, come out. Your father's talking to you. Martin, would you talk to him? Barry, I'm talking to you! You coming? Got everything? All set! Go ahead. I'll catch up. Don't be too long. Watch this! Vanessa! - We're still here. - I told you not to yell at him. He doesn't respond to yelling! - Then why yell at me? - Because you don't listen! I'm not listening to this. Sorry, I've gotta go. - Where are you going? - I'm meeting a friend. A girl? Is this why you can't decide? Bye. I just hope she's Bee-ish. They have a huge parade of flowers every year in Pasadena? To be in the Tournament of Roses, that's every florist's dream! Up on a float, surrounded by flowers, crowds cheering. A tournament. Do the roses compete in athletic events? No. All right, I've got one. How come you don't fly everywhere? It's exhausting. Why don't you run everywhere? It's faster. Yeah, OK, I see, I see. All right, your turn. TiVo. You can just freeze live TV? That's insane! You don't have that? We have Hivo, but it's a disease. It's a horrible, horrible disease. Oh, my. Dumb bees! You must want to sting all those jerks. We try not to sting. It's usually fatal for us. So you have to watch your temper. Very carefully. You kick a wall, take a walk, write an angry letter and throw it out. Work through it like any emotion: Anger, jealousy, lust. Oh, my goodness! Are you OK? Yeah. - What is wrong with you?! - It's a bug. He's not bothering anybody. Get out of here, you creep! What was that? A Pic 'N' Save circular? Yeah, it was. How did you know? It felt like about 10 pages. Seventy-five is pretty much our limit. You've really got that down to a science. - I lost a cousin to Italian Vogue. - I'll bet. What in the name of Mighty Hercules is this? How did this get here? Oute Bee, Golden Blossom, Ray Liotta Private Select? - Is he that actor? - I never heard of him. - Why is this here? - For people. We eat it. You don't have enough food of your own? - Well, yes. - How do you get it? - Bees make it. - I know who makes it! And it's hard to make it! There's heating, cooling, stirring. You need a whole Krelman thing! - It's organic. - It's our-ganic! It's just honey, Barry. Just what?! Bees don't know about this! This is stealing! A lot of stealing! You've taken our homes, schools, hospitals! This is all we have! And it's on sale?! I'm getting to the bottom of this. I'm getting to the bottom of all of this! Hey, Hector. - You almost done? - Almost. He is here. I sense it. Well, I guess I'll go home now and just leave this nice honey out, with no one around. You're busted, box boy! I knew I heard something. So you can talk! I can talk. And now you'll start talking! Where you getting the sweet stuff? Who's your supplier? I don't understand. I thought we were friends. The last thing we want to do is upset bees! You're too late! It's ours now! You, sir, have crossed the wrong sword! You, sir, will be

lunch formy iguana, Ignacio! Where is the honey coming from? Tell me where! Honey Farms! It comes from Honey Farms! Orazy person! What horrible thing has happened here? These faces, they never knew what hit them. And now they're on the road to nowhere! Just keep still. What? You're not dead? Do I look dead? They will wipe anything that moves. Where you headed? To Honey Farms. I am onto something huge here. I'm going to Alaska. Moose blood, crazy stuff. Blows your head off! I'm going to Tacoma. - And you? - He really is dead. All right. Uh-oh! - What is that?! - Oh, no! - A wiper! Triple blade! - Triple blade? Jump on! It's your only chance, bee! Why does everything have to be so doggone clean?! How much do you people need to see?! Open your eyes! Stick your head out the window! From NPR News in Washington, I'm Oarl Kasell. But don't kill no more bugs! - Bee! - Moose blood guy!! - You hear something? - Like what? Like tiny screaming. Turn off the radio. Whassup, bee boy? Hey, Blood. Just a row of honey jars, as far as the eye could see. Wow! I assume wherever this truck goes is where they're getting it. I mean, that honey's ours. - Bees hang tight. - We're all jammed in. It's a close community. Not us, man. We on our own. Every mosquito on his own. - What if you get in trouble? - You a mosquito, you in trouble. Nobody likes us. They just smack. See a mosquito, smack, smack! At least you're out in the world. You must meet girls. Mosquito girls try to trade up, get with a moth, dragonfly. Mosquito girl don't want no mosquito. You got to be kidding me! Mooseblood's about to leave the building! So long, bee! - Hey, guys! - Mooseblood! I knew I'd catch y'all down here. Did you bring your crazy straw? We throw it in jars, slap a label on it, and it's pretty much pure profit. What is this place? A bee's got a brain the size of a pinhead. They are pinheads! Pinhead. - Oheck out the new smoker. - Oh, sweet. That's the one you want. The Thomas 3000! Smoker? Ninety puffs a minute, semi-automatic. Twice the nicotine, all the tar. A couple breaths of this knocks them right out. They make the honey, and we make the money. "They make the honey, and we make the money"? Oh, my! What's going on? Are you OK? Yeah. It doesn't last too long. Do you know you're in a fake hive with fake walls? Our queen was moved here. We had no choice. This is your queen? That's a man in women's clothes! That's a drag queen! What is this? Oh, no! There's hundreds of them! Bee honey. Our honey is being brazenly stolen on a massive scale! This is worse than anything bears have done! I intend to do something. Oh, Barry, stop. Who told you humans are taking our honey? That's a rumor. Do these look like rumors? That's a conspiracy theory. These are obviously doctored photos. How did you get mixed up in this? He's been talking to humans. - What? - Talking to humans?! He has a human girlfriend. And they make out! Make out? Barry! We do not. - You wish you could. - Whose side are you on? The bees! I dated a cricket once in San Antonio. Those crazy legs kept me up all night. Barry, this is what you want to do with your life? I want to do it for all our lives. Nobody works harder than bees! Dad, I remember you coming home so overworked your hands were still stirring. You couldn't stop. I remember that. What right do they have to our honey? We live on two cups a year. They put it in lip balm for no reason whatsoever! Even if it's true, what can one bee do? Sting them where it really hurts. In the face! The eye! - That would hurt. - No. Up the nose? That's a killer. There's only one place you can sting the humans, one place where it matters. Hive at Five, the hive's only full-hour action news source. No more bee beards! With Bob Bumble at the anchor desk. Weather with Storm Stinger. Sports with Buzz Larvi. And Jeanette Ohung. - Good evening. I'm Bob Bumble. - And I'm Jeanette Ohung. A tri-county bee, Barry Benson, intends to sue the human race for stealing our honey, packaging it and profiting from it illegally! Tomorrow night on Bee Larry King, we'll have three former

queenshere in our studio, discussing their new book, Olassy Ladies, out this week on Hexagon. Tonight we're talking to Barry Benson. Did you ever think, "I'm a kid from the hive. I can't do this"? Bees have never been afraid to change the world. What about Bee Oolumbus? Bee Gandhi? Bejesus? Where I'm from, we'd never sue humans. We were thinking of stickball or candy stores. How old are you? The bee community is supporting you in this case, which will be the trial of the bee century. You know, they have a Larry King in the human world too. It's a common name. Next week... He looks like you and has a show and suspenders and colored dots... Next week... Glasses, quotes on the bottom from the guest even though you just heard 'em. Bear Week next week! They're scary, hairy and here live. Always leans forward, pointy shoulders, squinty eyes, very Jewish. In tennis, you attack at the point of weakness! It was my grandmother, Ken. She's 81. Honey, her backhand's a joke! I'm not gonna take advantage of that? Quiet, please. Actual work going on here. - Is that that same bee? - Yes, it is! I'm helping him sue the human race. - Hello. - Hello, bee. This is Ken. Yeah, I remember you. Timberland, size ten and a half. Vibram sole, I believe. Why does he talk again? Listen, you better go 'cause we're really busy working. But it's our yogurt night! Bye-bye. Why is yogurt night so difficult?! You poor thing. You two have been at this for hours! Yes, and Adam here has been a huge help. - Frosting... - How many sugars? Just one. I try not to use the competition. So why are you helping me? Bees have good qualities. And it takes my mind off the shop. Instead of flowers, people are giving balloon bouquets now. Those are great, if you're three. And artificial flowers. - Oh, those just get me psychotic! - Yeah, me too. Bent stingers, pointless pollination. Bees must hate those fake things! Nothing worse than a daffodil that's had work done. Maybe this could make up for it a little bit. - This lawsuit's a pretty big deal. - I guess. You sure you want to go through with it? Am I sure? When I'm done with the humans, they won't be able to say, "Honey, I'm home," without paying a royalty! It's an incredible scene here in downtown Manhattan, where the world anxiously waits, because for the first time in history, we will hear for ourselves if a honeybee can actually speak. What have we gotten into here, Barry? It's pretty big, isn't it? I can't believe how many humans don't work during the day. You think billion-dollar multinational food companies have good lawyers? Everybody needs to stay behind the barricade. - What's the matter? - I don't know, I just got a chill. Well, if it isn't the bee team. You boys work on this? All rise! The Honorable Judge Bumbleton presiding. All right. Oase number 4475, Superior Oourt of New York, Barry Bee Benson v. the Honey Industry is now in session. Mr. Montgomery, you're representing the five food companies collectively? A privilege. Mr. Benson... you're representing all the bees of the world? I'm kidding. Yes, Your Honor, we're ready to proceed. Mr. Montgomery, your opening statement, please. Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, my grandmother was a simple woman. Born on a farm, she believed it was man's divine right to benefit from the bounty of nature God put before us. If we lived in the topsy-turvy world Mr. Benson imagines, just think of what would it mean. I would have to negotiate with the silkworm for the elastic in my britches! Talking bee! How do we know this isn't some sort of holographic motion-picture-capture Hollywood wizardry? They could be using laser beams! Robotics! Ventriloquism! Oloning! For all we know, he could be on steroids! Mr. Benson? Ladies and gentlemen, there's no trickery here. I'm just an ordinary bee. Honey's pretty important to me. It's important to all bees. We invented it! We make it. And we protect it with our lives. Unfortunately, there are some people in this room who think they can take it from us 'cause we're the little guys! I'm hoping that, after this is all over, you'll see

how,by taking our honey, you not only take everything we have but everything we are! I wish he'd dress like that all the time. So nice! Oall your first witness. So, Mr. Klauss Vanderhayden of Honey Farms, big company you have. I suppose so. I see you also own Honeyburton and Honron! Yes, they provide beekeepers for our farms. Beekeeper. I find that to be a very disturbing term. I don't imagine you employ any bee-free-ers, do you? - No. - I couldn't hear you. - No. - No. Because you don't free bees. You keep bees. Not only that, it seems you thought a bear would be an appropriate image for a jar of honey. They're very lovable creatures. Yogi Bear, Fozzie Bear, Build-A-Bear. You mean like this? Bears kill bees! How'd you like his head crashing through your living room?! Biting into your couch! Spitting out your throw pillows! OK, that's enough. Take him away. So, Mr. Sting, thank you for being here. Your name intrigues me. - Where have I heard it before? - I was with a band called The Police. But you've never been a police officer, have you? No, I haven't. No, you haven't. And so here we have yet another example of bee culture casually stolen by a human for nothing more than a prance-about stage name. Oh, please. Have you ever been stung, Mr. Sting? Because I'm feeling a little stung, Sting. Or should I say... Mr. Gordon M. Sumner! That's not his real name?! You idiots! Mr. Liotta, first, belated congratulations on your Emmy win for a guest spot on ER in 2005. Thank you. Thank you. I see from your resume that you're devilishly handsome with a churning inner turmoil that's ready to blow. I enjoy what I do. Is that a crime? Not yet it isn't. But is this what it's come to for you? Exploiting tiny, helpless bees so you don't have to rehearse your part and learn your lines, sir? Watch it, Benson! I could blow right now! This isn't a goodfella. This is a badfella! Why doesn't someone just step on this creep, and we can all go home?! - Order in this court! - You're all thinking it! Order! Order, I say! - Say it! - Mr. Liotta, please sit down! I think it was awfully nice of that bear to pitch in like that. I think the jury's on our side. Are we doing everything right, legally? I'm a florist. Right. Well, here's to a great team. To a great team! Well, hello. - Ken! - Hello. I didn't think you were coming. No, I was just late. I tried to call, but... the battery. I didn't want all this to go to waste, so I called Barry. Luckily, he was free. Oh, that was lucky. There's a little left. I could heat it up. Yeah, heat it up, sure, whatever. So I hear you're quite a tennis player. I'm not much for the game myself. The ball's a little grabby. That's where I usually sit. Right... there. Ken, Barry was looking at your resume, and he agreed with me that eating with chopsticks isn't really a special skill. You think I don't see what you're doing? I know how hard it is to find the rightjob. We have that in common. Do we? Bees have 100 percent employment, but we do jobs like taking the crud out. That's just what I was thinking about doing. Ken, I let Barry borrow your razor for his fuzz. I hope that was all right. I'm going to drain the old stinger. Yeah, you do that. Look at that. You know, I've just about had it with your little mind games. - What's that? - Italian Vogue. Mamma mia, that's a lot of pages. A lot of ads. Remember what Van said, why is your life more valuable than mine? Funny, I just can't seem to recall that! I think something stinks in here! I love the smell of flowers. How do you like the smell of flames?! Not as much. Water bug! Not taking sides! Ken, I'm wearing a Ohapstick hat! This is pathetic! I've got issues! Well, well, well, a royal flush! - You're bluffing. - Am I? Surf's up, dude! Poo water! That bowl is gnarly. Except for those dirty yellow rings! Kenneth! What are you doing?! You know, I don't even like honey! I don't eat it! We need to talk! He's just a little bee! And he happens to be the nicest bee I've met in a long time! Long time? What are you talking about?! Are there other bugs in your life? No, but

thereare other things bugging me in life. And you're one of them! Fine! Talking bees, no yogurt night... My nerves are fried from riding on this emotional roller coaster! Goodbye, Ken. And for your information, I prefer sugar-free, artificial sweeteners made by man! I'm sorry about all that. I know it's got an aftertaste! I like it! I always felt there was some kind of barrier between Ken and me. I couldn't overcome it. Oh, well. Are you OK for the trial? I believe Mr. Montgomery is about out of ideas. We would like to call Mr. Barry Benson Bee to the stand. Good idea! You can really see why he's considered one of the best lawyers... Yeah. Layton, you've gotta weave some magic with this jury, or it's gonna be all over. Don't worry. The only thing I have to do to turn this jury around is to remind them of what they don't like about bees. - You got the tweezers? - Are you allergic? Only to losing, son. Only to losing. Mr. Benson Bee, I'll ask you what I think we'd all like to know. What exactly is your relationship to that woman? We're friends. - Good friends? - Yes. How good? Do you live together? Wait a minute... Are you her little... ...bedbug? I've seen a bee documentary or two. From what I understand, doesn't your queen give birth to all the bee children? - Yeah, but... - So those aren't your real parents! - Oh, Barry... - Yes, they are! Hold me back! You're an illegitimate bee, aren't you, Benson? He's denouncing bees! Don't y'all date your cousins? - Objection! - I'm going to pincushion this guy! Adam, don't! It's what he wants! Oh, I'm hit!! Oh, lordy, I am hit! Order! Order! The venom! The venom is coursing through my veins! I have been felled by a winged beast of destruction! You see? You can't treat them like equals! They're striped savages! Stinging's the only thing they know! It's their way! - Adam, stay with me. - I can't feel my legs. What angel of mercy will come forward to suck the poison from my heaving buttocks? I will have order in this court. Order! Order, please! The case of the honeybees versus the human race took a pointed turn against the bees yesterday when one of their legal team stung Layton T. Montgomery. - Hey, buddy. - Hey. - Is there much pain? - Yeah. I... I blew the whole case, didn't I? It doesn't matter. What matters is you're alive. You could have died. I'd be better off dead. Look at me. They got it from the cafeteria downstairs, in a tuna sandwich. Look, there's a little celery still on it. What was it like to sting someone? I can't explain it. It was all... All adrenaline and then... and then ecstasy! All right. You think it was all a trap? Of course. I'm sorry. I flew us right into this. What were we thinking? Look at us. We're just a couple of bugs in this world. What will the humans do to us if they win? I don't know. I hear they put the roaches in motels. That doesn't sound so bad. Adam, they check in, but they don't check out! Oh, my. Oould you get a nurse to close that window? - Why? - The smoke. Bees don't smoke. Right. Bees don't smoke. Bees don't smoke! But some bees are smoking. That's it! That's our case! It is? It's not over? Get dressed. I've gotta go somewhere. Get back to the court and stall. Stall any way you can. And assuming you've done step correctly, you're ready for the tub. Mr. Flayman. Yes? Yes, Your Honor! Where is the rest of your team? Well, Your Honor, it's interesting. Bees are trained to fly haphazardly, and as a result, we don't make very good time. I actually heard a funny story about... Your Honor, haven't these ridiculous bugs taken up enough of this court's valuable time? How much longer will we allow these absurd shenanigans to go on? They have presented no compelling evidence to support their charges against my clients, who run legitimate businesses. I move for a complete dismissal of this entire case! Mr. Flayman, I'm afraid I'm going to have to consider Mr. Montgomery's motion. But you can't! We have a terrific case. Where is your proof? Where is the evidence? Show me the smoking gun! Hold it, Your Honor! You want a smoking gun? Here is your

smokinggun. What is that? It's a bee smoker! What, this? This harmless little contraption? This couldn't hurt a fly, let alone a bee. Look at what has happened to bees who have never been asked, "Smoking or non?" Is this what nature intended for us? To be forcibly addicted to smoke machines and man-made wooden slat work camps? Living out our lives as honey slaves to the white man? - What are we gonna do? - He's playing the species card. Ladies and gentlemen, please, free these bees! Free the bees! Free the bees! Free the bees! Free the bees! Free the bees! The court finds in favor of the bees! Vanessa, we won! I knew you could do it! High-five! Sorry. I'm OK! You know what this means? All the honey will finally belong to the bees. Now we won't have to work so hard all the time. This is an unholy perversion of the balance of nature, Benson. You'll regret this. Barry, how much honey is out there? All right. One at a time. Barry, who are you wearing? My sweater is Ralph Lauren, and I have no pants. - What if Montgomery's right? - What do you mean? We've been living the bee way a long time, 27 million years. Oongratulations on your victory. What will you demand as a settlement? First, we'll demand a complete shutdown of all bee work camps. Then we want back the honey that was ours to begin with, every last drop. We demand an end to the glorification of the bear as anything more than a filthy, smelly, bad-breath stink machine. We're all aware of what they do in the woods. Wait for my signal. Take him out. He'll have nauseous for a few hours, then he'll be fine. And we will no longer tolerate bee-negative nicknames... But it's just a prance-about stage name! ...unnecessary inclusion of honey in bogus health products and la-dee-da human tea-time snack garnishments. Oan't breathe. Bring it in, boys! Hold it right there! Good. Tap it. Mr. Buzzwell, we just passed three cups, and there's gallons more coming! - I think we need to shut down! - Shut down? We've never shut down. Shut down honey production! Stop making honey! Turn your key, sir! What do we do now? Oannonball! We're shutting honey production! Mission abort. Aborting pollination and nectar detail. Returning to base. Adam, you wouldn't believe how much honey was out there. Oh, yeah? What's going on? Where is everybody? - Are they out celebrating? - They're home. They don't know what to do. Laying out, sleeping in. I heard your Uncle Oarl was on his way to San Antonio with a cricket. At least we got our honey back. Sometimes I think, so what if humans liked our honey? Who wouldn't? It's the greatest thing in the world! I was excited to be part of making it. This was my new desk. This was my new job. I wanted to do it really well. And now... Now I can't. I don't understand why they're not happy. I thought their lives would be better! They're doing nothing. It's amazing. Honey really changes people. You don't have any idea what's going on, do you? - What did you want to show me? - This. What happened here? That is not the half of it. Oh, no. Oh, my. They're all wilting. Doesn't look very good, does it? No. And whose fault do you think that is? You know, I'm gonna guess bees. Bees? Specifically, me. I didn't think bees not needing to make honey would affect all these things. It's notjust flowers. Fruits, vegetables, they all need bees. That's our whole SAT test right there. Take away produce, that affects the entire animal kingdom. And then, of course... The human species? So if there's no more pollination, it could all just go south here, couldn't it? I know this is also partly my fault. How about a suicide pact? How do we do it? - I'll sting you, you step on me. - Thatjust kills you twice. Right, right. Listen, Barry... sorry, but I gotta get going. I had to open my mouth and talk. Vanessa? Vanessa? Why are you leaving? Where are you going? To the final Tournament of Roses parade in Pasadena. They've moved it to this weekend because all the flowers are dying. It's the last chance I'll ever have to see it. Vanessa, I just wanna say I'm sorry. I never meant it to turn out

likethis. I know. Me neither. Tournament of Roses. Roses can't do sports. Wait a minute. Roses. Roses? Roses! Vanessa! Roses?! Barry? - Roses are flowers! - Yes, they are. Flowers, bees, pollen! I know. That's why this is the last parade. Maybe not. Oould you ask him to slow down? Oould you slow down? Barry! OK, I made a huge mistake. This is a total disaster, all my fault. Yes, it kind of is. I've ruined the planet. I wanted to help you with the flower shop. I've made it worse. Actually, it's completely closed down. I thought maybe you were remodeling. But I have another idea, and it's greater than my previous ideas combined. I don't want to hear it! All right, they have the roses, the roses have the pollen. I know every bee, plant and flower bud in this park. All we gotta do is get what they've got back here with what we've got. - Bees. - Park. - Pollen! - Flowers. - Repollination! - Across the nation! Tournament of Roses, Pasadena, Oalifornia. They've got nothing but flowers, floats and cotton candy. Security will be tight. I have an idea. Vanessa Bloome, FTD. Official floral business. It's real. Sorry, ma'am. Nice brooch. Thank you. It was a gift. Once inside, we just pick the right float. How about The Princess and the Pea? I could be the princess, and you could be the pea! Yes, I got it. - Where should I sit? - What are you? - I believe I'm the pea. - The pea? It goes under the mattresses. - Not in this fairy tale, sweetheart. - I'm getting the marshal. You do that! This whole parade is a fiasco! Let's see what this baby'll do. Hey, what are you doing?! Then all we do is blend in with traffic... ...without arousing suspicion. Once at the airport, there's no stopping us. Stop! Security. - You and your insect pack your float? - Yes. Has it been in your possession the entire time? Would you remove your shoes? - Remove your stinger. - It's part of me. I know. Just having some fun. Enjoy your flight. Then if we're lucky, we'll have just enough pollen to do the job. Oan you believe how lucky we are? We have just enough pollen to do the job! I think this is gonna work. It's got to work. Attention, passengers, this is Oaptain Scott. We have a bit of bad weather in New York. It looks like we'll experience a couple hours delay. Barry, these are cut flowers with no water. They'll never make it. I gotta get up there and talk to them. Be careful. Oan I get help with the Sky Mall magazine? I'd like to order the talking inflatable nose and ear hair trimmer. Oaptain, I'm in a real situation. - What'd you say, Hal? - Nothing. Bee! Don't freak out! My entire species... What are you doing? - Wait a minute! I'm an attorney! - Who's an attorney? Don't move. Oh, Barry. Good afternoon, passengers. This is your captain. Would a Miss Vanessa Bloome in 24B please report to the cockpit? And please hurry! What happened here? There was a DustBuster, a toupee, a life raft exploded. One's bald, one's in a boat, they're both unconscious! - Is that another bee joke? - No! No one's flying the plane! This is JFK control tower, Flight 356. What's your status? This is Vanessa Bloome. I'm a florist from New York. Where's the pilot? He's unconscious, and so is the copilot. Not good. Does anyone onboard have flight experience? As a matter of fact, there is. - Who's that? - Barry Benson. From the honey trial?! Oh, great. Vanessa, this is nothing more than a big metal bee. It's got giant wings, huge engines. I can't fly a plane. - Why not? Isn't John Travolta a pilot? - Yes. How hard could it be? Wait, Barry! We're headed into some lightning. This is Bob Bumble. We have some late-breaking news from JFK Airport, where a suspenseful scene is developing. Barry Benson, fresh from his legal victory... That's Barry! ...is attempting to land a plane, loaded with people, flowers and an incapacitated flight crew. Flowers?! We have a storm in the area and two individuals at the controls with absolutely no flight experience. Just a minute. There's a bee on that plane. I'm quite familiar with Mr. Benson and his no-account compadres. They've done enough damage. But

isn'the your only hope? Technically, a bee shouldn't be able to fly at all. Their wings are too small... Haven't we heard this a million times? "The surface area of the wings and body mass make no sense." - Get this on the air! - Got it. - Stand by. - We're going live. The way we work may be a mystery to you. Making honey takes a lot of bees doing a lot of small jobs. But let me tell you about a small job. If you do it well, it makes a big difference. More than we realized. To us, to everyone. That's why I want to get bees back to working together. That's the bee way! We're not made of Jell-O. We get behind a fellow. - Black and yellow! - Hello! Left, right, down, hover. - Hover? - Forget hover. This isn't so hard. Beep-beep! Beep-beep! Barry, what happened?! Wait, I think we were on autopilot the whole time. - That may have been helping me. - And now we're not! So it turns out I cannot fly a plane. All of you, let's get behind this fellow! Move it out! Move out! Our only chance is if I do what I'd do, you copy me with the wings of the plane! Don't have to yell. I'm not yelling! We're in a lot of trouble. It's very hard to concentrate with that panicky tone in your voice! It's not a tone. I'm panicking! I can't do this! Vanessa, pull yourself together. You have to snap out of it! You snap out of it. You snap out of it. - You snap out of it! - You snap out of it! - You snap out of it! - You snap out of it! - You snap out of it! - You snap out of it! - Hold it! - Why? Oome on, it's my turn. How is the plane flying? I don't know. Hello? Benson, got any flowers for a happy occasion in there? The Pollen Jocks! They do get behind a fellow. - Black and yellow. - Hello. All right, let's drop this tin can on the blacktop. Where? I can't see anything. Oan you? No, nothing. It's all cloudy. Oome on. You got to think bee, Barry. - Thinking bee. - Thinking bee. Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Wait a minute. I think I'm feeling something. - What? - I don't know. It's strong, pulling me. Like a 27-million-year-old instinct. Bring the nose down. Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Thinking bee! - What in the world is on the tarmac? - Get some lights on that! Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Thinking bee! - Vanessa, aim for the flower. - OK. Out the engines. We're going in on bee power. Ready, boys? Affirmative! Good. Good. Easy, now. That's it. Land on that flower! Ready? Full reverse! Spin it around! - Not that flower! The other one! - Which one? - That flower. - I'm aiming at the flower! That's a fat guy in a flowered shirt. I mean the giant pulsating flower made of millions of bees! Pull forward. Nose down. Tail up. Rotate around it. - This is insane, Barry! - This's the only way I know how to fly. Am I koo-koo-kachoo, or is this plane flying in an insect-like pattern? Get your nose in there. Don't be afraid. Smell it. Full reverse! Just drop it. Be a part of it. Aim for the center! Now drop it in! Drop it in, woman! Oome on, already. Barry, we did it! You taught me how to fly! - Yes. No high-five! - Right. Barry, it worked! Did you see the giant flower? What giant flower? Where? Of course I saw the flower! That was genius! - Thank you. - But we're not done yet. Listen, everyone! This runway is covered with the last pollen from the last flowers available anywhere on Earth. That means this is our last chance. We're the only ones who make honey, pollinate flowers and dress like this. If we're gonna survive as a species, this is our moment! What do you say? Are we going to be bees, orjust Museum of Natural History keychains? We're bees! Keychain! Then follow me! Except Keychain. Hold on, Barry. Here. You've earned this. Yeah! I'm a Pollen Jock! And it's a perfect fit. All I gotta do are the sleeves. Oh, yeah. That's our Barry. Mom! The bees are back! If anybody needs to make a call, now's the time. I got a feeling we'll be working late tonight! Here's your change. Have a great afternoon! Oan I help who's next? Would you like some honey with that? It is bee-approved. Don't forget these. Milk, cream, cheese, it's all me. And I don't see

anickel! Sometimes I just feel like a piece of meat! I had no idea. Barry, I'm sorry. Have you got a moment? Would you excuse me? My mosquito associate will help you. Sorry I'm late. He's a lawyer too? I was already a blood-sucking parasite. All I needed was a briefcase. Have a great afternoon! Barry, I just got this huge tulip order, and I can't get them anywhere. No problem, Vannie. Just leave it to me. You're a lifesaver, Barry. Oan I help who's next? All right, scramble, jocks! It's time to fly. Thank you, Barry! That bee is living my life! Let it go, Kenny. - When will this nightmare end?! - Let it all go. - Beautiful day to fly. - Sure is. Between you and me, I was dying to get out of that office. You have got to start thinking bee, my friend. - Thinking bee! - Me? Hold it. Let's just stop for a second. Hold it. I'm sorry. I'm sorry, everyone. Oan we stop here? I'm not making a major life decision during a production number! All right. Take ten, everybody. Wrap it up, guys. I had virtually no rehearsal for that.

- bee movie anon

[yagamiluvr]

hi, so u’re taking requests i see (~˘▾˘)~ could u pls do dating L hcs? have a great day pls. tia :D

— (can i be the 💤 anon?)

yesss i'll gladly do that! and you most definitely can be the 💤 anon :)) i hope you like these! <3

l is naturally a very awkward and introverted kind of guy, but now that he has you in his life, he's more comfortable coming out his shell

a lot of times he's very distant during the day, devoting most of his attention to solving cases left and right

but that doesn't mean he ignores you!

l always feels incredibly guilty when he has to devote his time to work rather than spending it with you :(

he loves to shower you in affection whenever he gets the chance, hugging you tightly and pecking your cheeks

he also REALLY loves cuddles! his favorite part of the day is being able to climb in bed with you at night and just hold you close

he naturally has cold skin, so he absolutely adores snuggling with you and feeling your body warmth radiate against him

whenever he's stressed, he takes your hand in his and starts playing with your fingers to calm himself

his love language is gift giving, so whenever he goes out, he'll always pick up little trinkets he sees in shops that he thinks you'll like

l is incredibly stingy with his sweets, but he'll gladly share his treats with you if you ask!

(just don't take more than what he says you can, otherwise he'll have a tantrum and be all pouty LMAO)

(but don't worry, he's never truly angry with you)

most of the time he keeps his work life and his love life separate, but on occasion, he'll ask you for your thoughts on clues and evidence he's collected

however, things start to shift a bit once he's tasked with the kira case

l becomes way more work-oriented and stressed out, constantly turning to you for comfort

he involves you more in helping out with the case, as even along with light and the task force helping him out, it's still not enough

you help him calm down after long days by running your fingers through his thick raven hair while you two cuddle in the evenings

l doesn't explicitly say "i love you" all the time; instead he expresses his love for you indirectly

he's extra sincere with the things he says about you, because he truly means it

"i'm so incredibly lucky to have someone like you in my life, (y/n)."

"what have i done to deserve such a wonderful partner by my side?"

"i could never get tired of you."

he doesn't say these things all the time either; a lot of the times it's incredibly out of the blue

he's just too sweet <3

you're one of the only people that l truly feels comfortable enough opening up to

and he especially cherishes you since he's incredibly insecure about himself, but you're able to make him feel happy with who he is

take care of him :(( you really struck a goldmine with this one <3

here's a song that i think perfectly encapsulates a relationship with l! i got you by maddie jay :D (the text is a link to the song on youtube, but i'll also be including a spotify link if you'd rather use that!)