#WHAT IS HOME?

[haveyoureadthispoem-poll]

"It is my uncle’s prayer rug, where dozens of ants / slept on wintry nights, before it was looted and / put in a museum."

Read it here | Reblog for a larger sample size

[your-local-closet-monster]

Home, a place I never knew

"I miss my home"

they say.

What is home?

I never knew the real meaning of that word.

Some say it's just a place.

Some say it's a person.

Most people think rather positively about this word.

What about me?

I never had a real home.

My first "home" was just a dark place.

A place that hurt me.

A place I hated.

My second "home" wasn't even a home.

I was used.

Broken into a weapon. A tool.

Nothing more. Nothing emotional.

And now?

I'm not sure if this place is a home.

My existence alone proves this life wasn't perfect.

However it did get better.

The demons of the past still haunt this body, but they're mainly in the past.

But I'm getting off topic.

Often I hear my headmates whine about how much they miss home.

How much they miss their family.

Their old life.

Their powers.

I may not feel the same.

My old life wasn't one with a home.

But I will do my best to make this place a home.

[full-of-roman-angst-trash]

What is Home? Chapter 9

Masterpost

Note: There's going to be a chapter 10.

TW: Abuse, Neglect, Eating Disorder, Drug Abuse, Smoking, Depression, Injuries. (Ask to tag)

Ship(s): Anaroceit, Small hint of Intrulogical.

---

Roman, Virgil, and Janus began to go on dates all throughout the last month before the court hearing. At first, they kept the relationship a secret since it wasn’t official and it was more of an experimental thing. After their 5th date, the teens decided that they were ready to commit to a relationship after they confirmed that it would work out for them. And once it was official, they announced it to their friends.

Of course, their friends were extremely happy for the three. Remus of course pulled Virgil and Janus aside and gave them the mandatory talk about not hurting his sibling or else ze’ll kill them. Janus and Virgil promised they’ll take care of Roman and never hurt them.

In the end though, Remus was okay handing off zir twin since ze could see how happy Roman was with their boyfriends. All ze has ever wanted was for zir sibling to be happy and if Janus and Virgil give them that then ze is happy too.

The time eventually came.

The twins drive to their hometown for the hearing late at night so they can arrive at the court early in the morning. Iris decides to pay for a hotel room in the twins' hometown. She does this so that not only can the twins' friends go and support their friends, but also so that the twins have a place to stay after the hearing. Unfortunately, the others weren't allowed into the court hearing since it isn’t open to the public.

As they enter the courtroom, the twins avoid looking at their parents as much as they can. They do their best to tune out their parents’ voices, though this is much harder considering the fact that their parents have to make statements to the judge.

Eventually, Remus is called to make zir statement.

As ze stands there reading zir statement, ze can feel zir parents staring at zir. They look nearly identical since the last time ze saw them.

Zir mother’s chestnut brown skin seems to have gotten slightly lighter. She was still as short as ever, Roman having gotten their height from her. Her amber eyes that ze can feel glaring at zir are still as cold and sharp as ever. Her long wavy hair is tied up into a clean lower bun. Her appearance is cleaner than it usually is, probably something her lawyers advised her to do to make her seem more professional.

Remus isn’t as scared of zir mother as ze is of zir father. Zir father is 6'7", something zir's father always used to intimidate Remus. On top of his height, zir father is also muscular, a trait he works hard to keep since not only did it give him a good public image, but it was also something else he could use to strike fear into the twins. What scares Remus the most though is how similar ze looks to zir father. Zir's curly hair, facial features, and hair color come from zir father. Ze hated it, but ze knew there was nothing ze could do to change this.

In zir's statement, ze details some of the abuse zir was subjected to; However, ze avoids going into too much detail since ze knows the judge has already seen the evidence. Instead, ze mostly describes how zir parents’ abuse caused zir irreversible mental and physical damage.

Ze talks about how ze developed an eating disorder due to the neglect and negative comments zir parents made about zir body. Ze talked about how seeing zir parents abuse drugs at a young age led to zir becoming an addict as well. Ze mentioned how years of malnutrition has caused zir many side effects, everything from dry hair to a weakened immune system.

Once Remus is done with zir statement, ze is on the brink of crying. Knowing that zir parents, the people responsible for so much of zir pain, are in the room listening to zir talk bad about them made this whole situation so much harder for zir. Ze knows that if they don’t win this court case and ze is forced to go back home, this statement might be the death of zir. Ze just hopes that zir statement can help guarantee they win.

Roman is called to make their statement next.

In the beginning, the twins’ lawyer was adamant about Roman not making a statement. It wasn’t because they didn’t have anything important to say, it was because they’re super emotional. They have a harder time speaking about their past without breaking down than their older twin does.

But, after Roman wrote the statement and showed it to their lawyer, she agreed to let them read it in court. So for weeks, they practiced reading the statement over and over in front of their twin and their boyfriends.

At first, it was tough. Roman would barely be able to make it halfway through the statement before breaking down crying. However, the more they practiced and the more they got the support of those who love them, the easier it got for them.

So, as Roman stood in front of the judge, they stood strong. They read in a confident and powerful tone. They kept their emotions in check, making sure they didn’t crumble or give their parents the satisfaction of making them cry. They kept a strong composure, maintaining eye contact with the judge throughout most of their speech.

Roman’s statement was vastly different to their twin’s. They chose to speak about how much better they’re living now compared to in the past. They speak about how amazing it is to finally live with people who actually love and care about them. They speak about how liberating it is to know that their friends accept their gender identity and sexuality, something their parents could never do. They speak about how refreshing it is to come home and not have to worry about not having electricity, medicine, food, or even just clean water.

They go into very few details about the actual abuse they go through. They do mention their struggle with anorexia, kleptomania, depression, and drug addiction due to the way they grew up. They talk about how they only managed to survive living in their parents’ house because of Remus and if it weren't for zir, they wouldn’t be standing in the courtroom.

As Roman comes to the end of their statement, they turn to their parents.

“And to the people who like to call themselves my parents, you have done nothing to earn that title. You both have no idea how to care for anyone who isn't yourselves. For that reason, neither of you deserve the right to have custody of me or Remus, who for the longest time was forced to take the role of my parent.”

Remus smiles softly. Ze was so proud of how much zir twin has grown and matured. Ze just hopes that they’ll win and be able to continue growing.

After Roman’s statement, all that was left was going over a couple more documents and lawyer statements.

Soon though, the judge is ready to make the final decision.

The twin’s tightly hold hands, both of them anxious and scared for the results. This was it. This is their chance to finally be free from the years of suffering they’ve endured. This is the last chance they have to start anew.

Iris stands outside of the courtroom with her cousin and his friends. They’ve been standing out there for about an hour now. No one knew how much longer Roman and Remus would be inside, but it didn’t matter. They were willing to wait out here as long as it took.

They knew that the second their friends came outside, they would need support.

So as the doors of the courtroom opened, they all immediately prepared for whatever reaction the twins would have coming out. However, what they weren’t expecting was to see the twins’ parents walk out first with their lawyers.

“Virgil, Janus, don’t,” Iris mumbles as she notices the anger in the two teen’s faces. “Stay focused. Roman and Remus will come out soon, that’s all that matters.”

Virgil scoffs and holds Janus’ hand, “I guess. They’re lucky you’re here.”

“You wouldn’t really be able to do anything even if she wasn’t here Virge,” Logan chimes in, “There’s literally police officers everywhere. Besides, they really don’t deserve your time, emotion, or attention.”

“There they are!” Remy calls out and points to the courtroom doors before Virgil can respond to Logan.

The twins walk out with their lawyers. Roman is crying, a hand covering their mouth. Their other hand is being held tightly by Remus, who is whispering something to zir twin with a bright smile and tears in zir eyes. Their lawyers are talking among themselves, smiles also present on their faces.

Their friends immediately run over to them.

Roman practically lunges at their boyfriends when they notice them. Meanwhile, Remus just waits for the others to get to zir.

“Ro?! What happened?!” Janus asks frantically as he hugs them back, “Did you win?!”

The tan twin doesn’t answer, crying too much to say anything. They can’t even seem to nod or shake their head. Instead, all they can really do is let out an incoherent sound.

Emile notices and turns to Remus for answers instead, “Did you guys win?”

“How about you ask them?” Remus responds as ze points to zir lawyers.

The teens turn to the lawyers with worried and curious expressions.

One of the lawyers gets a file and holds it out to Iris, “Here you go, ma’am. You have to sign these papers and turn them into the court in the span of two months to finalize the adoption process.”

Iris takes the papers with a shock expression before smiling brightly, “Oh my! Thank you so so much!”

The lawyers nod and say goodbye before walking off.

“You won!!” Patton yells excitedly.

Remus lets out a small laugh, a couple tears roll down zir cheeks as ze nods, “We did it! We’re finally free!”

“That’s amazing!” Virgil smiles widely, hugging Roman tighter before kissing their forehead and whispering to them, “You’re free, Ro!”

Roman finally manages to nod as they continue crying from the overwhelming joy they feel. They were finally going to have the opportunity to experience a normal life. They finally have the chance to try and heal from the years of abuse they’ve experienced.

The teens stay outside of the court room for about 30 minutes as they embrace and celebrate the huge victory they’ve just had.

Eventually, they go to the hotel to rest.

Early the next day, they start heading back home. Some of them ride with Iris and others go with Remus.

They get to Iris’s house at around midday and for the rest of the day they throw a small party to celebrate. It was amazing. They had the time of their lives as they let the rest of the world fade away. That evening, all that mattered was the victory and nothing else.

“Are you tired?” Logan asks Remus, seeing zir yawn.

Remus leans against the wall. The two of them are in the backyard. They had stepped out to get some fresh air while the others were still in the living room.

“Yeah, a bit,” Remus responds. “I mean everything still feels so surreal and a bit overwhelming. It’s been an emotional rollercoaster.”

The pale teen nods, “That’s fair. I can’t imagine it’s easy to go through so much trauma and emotional instability.”

The other just nods and for a couple of minutes the two of them go quiet. They allowed nature to be the only noise around them. They both knew they needed a moment of silence and this was the only chance they really had to achieve that.

“Hey Remus,” Logan eventually says as they look up at the sky. “Can I confess something to you?”

The curly haired teen nods, “Go ahead.”

“I have a crush on you. And I have for a while now,” Logan gets straight to the point after taking a deep breath.

Remus blushes deeply as ze is caught completely off guard, “H-huh?!”

“You don’t have to return the feelings,” the shorter teen reassures as they look at Remus, “You don’t even have to respond to my confession if you’re not ready to yet. I know it’s been a long couple of days for you, so don’t feel pressured to give me a response.”

The twin takes a deep breath and nods, “Can I give you my response another day? I need some time to think about everything that has happened.”

Logan smiles and nods, “Take as long as you need.”

---

@thedeadandthedecaying

[inbabylontheywept]

so once me and my wife were watching a documentary where a snake ate like a million eggs. that snake just went to fucking town on eggs. and the snake made the eggs look so good that i kept thinking about it, and thinking about it, and thinking about it, and eventually it was 11pm and i ran out of willpower and decided to eat one (1) singular raw egg just to prove to myself that the snake was surely a liar.

the snake was not a liar. texture is like, super important to me and raw eggs are very Texture so i had another one, and then another one, and then another one, and eventually i ran out of eggs.

i had like, fifteen raw eggs.

i didnt really know how to explain this momentary madness to my wife, so my Plan was to put all the eggshells into a grocey bag, and then throw that grocery bag in the dumpster, and if she never noticed that would be Excellent and if she noticed immediately i could lie and say that the eggs went bad.

except i cant lie very good, and of course with murphys law being such, i got salmonella.

so i threw up a lot and my wife asked me what poisoned me so and i tried very hard to dodge the question but i was oozing shame like oil from a room temperature cheese and eventaully i gave in and told her everything and to her enormous credit she was more flabbergasted than actually upset. she did make me promise to not eat any more raw eggs, which i have stuck to, and she gives me weird looks during nature documentaries now as if desire was the only thing keeping me from eating thousands of pounds of krill anyway i made a joke earlier about being able to eat my age in eggs and my sister in law in law made a drawing to comemorate the moment and also because it was my birthday. she's excellent. thank you 10000000% @cintailed. you should all visit her page and admire her work.

[bethfuller]

limited perception.

find me on instagram!

[bookwyrminspiration]

I can behave normally around books

[idoodlestuffsometimes]

I need to share how the IT guy at work greeted my department on CrowdStrike Blue Screen Friday. Never have I seen a man so shocked by the sight of perfectly functional computers

(They were off during the update)

[biggest-gaudiest-patronuses]

historical drama/sitcom where two gay best friends (woman and man) get lavender married--and proceed to spend the Fancy European Honeymoon their parents paid for acting as each other's wingman

[retquits]

1.6 is coming—see you march 19th!!! 🥹🌱

[stuckinapril]

Incredibly alarming that talks of “peace” in Gaza seem to extend no further than a ceasefire. How do you think they’re gonna start off where they left off themselves? Their houses are destroyed, so many have lost mothers and fathers and brothers and children, they still have no clean water and no food. Any area Israel withdraws out of is an area it already knows has been rendered inhospitable. There was even a direct quote by some IOF soldier gleefully stating how he “wasn’t sure Palestinians could go back to their homes.” So what happens when the US “succeeds at negotiating a ceasefire”? Who will be responsible for helping the Palestinians rebuild all that they’ve lost?

[thatrandomblogsays]

Annabeth: I, a child, had to earn Thalia’s love, that’s how the world works! I have to earn my moms love. Love is transactional, you gotta be worthy of it first silly :)

Percy, listening to this on the train

[fckbatmanhiskidsareminenow]

batfam meets the JL but it’s just the bat kids breaking into the watch tower during a debriefing or meeting to ask bruce the most mundane questions. they go about it like they’re interns that need to speak to the CEO during a board meeting. they walk over waving their hands and mouthing “i’m so sorry just need to ask batman something 😬” and then they lean over to bruce and ask something like “alfred wants to know if you’re gonna be home for dinner” and then they dip.

one of them started this when bruce didn’t answer their texts (it was probably tim or something) and now everyone does it.

[full-of-roman-angst-trash]

What is Home? Epilogue

Masterpost

Ships: Intrulogical, Anaroceit

“Good morning Ro! Good morning Rem!” Patton greets his friends with a wave and a smile.

“Well, Lo, Emile, and Janus are,” the pale boy explains, “Virgil and Remy aren’t here yet. I think they’re getting the coffee for everyone.”

Roman smiles and waves back, “Good morning Pat. Are the others in the back?”

“Alright. Imma go say hi to the others, call me when Vee and Remy get here,” Remus says as he starts to walk to the back.

“Alrighty! I’ll do that!” The blue-haired boy promises before turning back to Roman and starting a conversation with them.

Remus gets to the back and smiles before jokingly saying, “Good morning guys! I’m here to bless you with my presence!” 

Janus rolls xyr eyes, “Good morning to you too bitch.”

“Jan, language,” Emile says with a giggle, “Good morning Rem. Is Ro in the front with Patton?”

Remus looks at Logan who didn’t greet zem before mumbling, “Uh, yeah. They’re waiting for Virgil and Remy to arrive.”

Emile and Janus share a look before nodding at each other.

“Well, imma go greet and talk to my beloved,” Janus speaks up with a hum, “Wanna come with me, Emile?”

“Yeah, come on!”

The two of them walk out, closing the door behind them and leaving Logan and Remus alone to talk. Something everyone knows they have to do. After all, the two of them still have to decide what they want their relationship to be.

“Lo? You okay?” The taller teen asks, a worried expression on zir face.

The two of them stare at each other for a minute, letting the world melt away around them. They just stood there admiring one another. Both of them happy with the decision they’ve made. And both of them ready to start what they hope will be an amazing relationship.

Logan sighs and folds their arms, “Yeah, I’m fine. Sorry for not telling you good morning. I was spacing out slightly.”

Remus simply nods, unsure of what to say next.

Logan thinks for a minute or so before speaking again, “Have you thought about my confession. I know things have been crazy lately and I wouldn’t blame you if you haven’t made up your mind yet, but I just want to ask.”

The curly-haired teen plaus with their sleeve as they blush lightly, “I have. And I have a response to your confession and feelings.”

“Oh, okay,” the other responds nervously, “So, what’s your decision?”

Remus blushes deeper and glances down before taking a deep breath, “I feel the same way about you and I want to try out a romantic relationship with you.”

“Really?!” Logan blushes deeply and clears their throat to stay calm, “I’m so happy you feel the same way. And I’m ready to start dating whenever you are.”

The taller teen smiles, “Well, you better take me somewhere nice this weekend then.”

The dark haired teen chuckles, “I promise I will, Rem.”

“Rem! Lo! The coffees are here!” 

The two of them are suddenly snapped back to reality by Patton’s voice.

“Alright! We’ll be there in a bit!” Remus yells back before smiling at Logan and holding out a hand for them, “Ready to go?”

Logan blushes and takes zir hand as they smile back, “Yeah, let’s go. I desperately need my morning coffee.”

And after a chuckle from Remus the two of them start walking to the front to start a day of work and hanging out with friends.

The twins ready to start a day in their new home. A real home with those they love around them.

---

@thedeadandthedecaying

[dirt-goth]

As much as I want to be a wholly joyous about the fact that Henry Kissinger is finally fucking dead, as he deserves... There's a lot of me that can't help being upset with. With the fact that he lived to 100 years old. He got better medical care, better housing, and a better, more stable life for those 100 years than billions on this planet ever going to see and he did it specifically through exploitation, state sanctioned murder, and lies. He lived to 100 years comfortably on a legacy of violence that rarely threatened his personal comfort. I want to be joyous that he's finally dead, because the world IS better with him dead, but the reality is he won a long time ago.

[petrichara]

‘Love is the one thing that we’re capable of perceiving that transcends dimensions of time and space.’

“Eulogy from a Physicist” by Aaron Freeman, with quotes from Interstellar by Christopher Nolan, and images from NASA, Interstellar, Getty, Petrichara, and Reuters.

1- NASA: GOODS-South.

2- NASA: NGC 1850.

3- NASA: Iberian Peninsula.

4- Christopher Nolan: Interstellar.

5- NASA: From the Earth to the Moon.

6- Hannah La Folette Ryan: Subway Hands.

7- Adams Evans: Heart Nebula.

8- NASA: Exploring the Antennae.

9- NASA: Crescent Moon from the International Space Station.

10- Petrichara.

11- Getty Images.

12- NASA: SMACS 0723.

13- Reuters

[sheshallfromtimetotime]

National Poetry Month 2024 - Day One What is Home? - Mosab Abu Toha