#a lot has changed. i've met a lot of people. made a lot of memories. so many things that i wouldn't even have dared would happen

[thissongisawesome]

now, do i personally believe that maya and franziska would actively try to get phoenix and edgeworth together? not really. BUT. i don't see the harm in people writing scenarios in which they would? ik this sounds silly since maya and franziska wingmaning is one of the more popular ace attorney fic tropes, but i feel like recently i've seen a lot of hate towards and and i don't understand why!

think of it this way: maya is phoenix's best friend and like pseudo little sister, they're extremely close, and i'm pretty sure she teases him about his love life AT LEAST once in canon (it could be more, or i could've completely made this up, but i've played the trilogy enough where if i tried i could probably find an example but it's late and i'm tired). anyway with that said, why WOULDN'T she care about them getting together? she's shown in the first game to be pretty invested in "the deal with [nick] and edgeworth" her words, not mine. i'm not one to speak on later games because i honestly haven't touched them in over two years and even then they were a complete blur and i forgot everything except that edgeworth looked really ugly from the front. but. if my memory serves me i don't think their dynamic changed much? i can't see her caring AS much at 28 as she would at 17, because obviously she's grown and matured, but i don't think she'd be completely uninterested like some people say. maybe she wouldn't be wearing comical disguises to spy on them, but i could see her encouraging nick, or idk just telling trucy stuff about their old cases to stir something up.

i think the franziska side of things is where i'm a little more understanding, but also not really. on one hand, i get that she's very well put together and mature seeming. on the other hand, that's only how she SEEMS. i won't get into a whole franziska analysis because this post is already longer than i wanted and no one wants to hear me ramble about her, but she's not really as mature as she seems. anyway, would she care THAT much? the answer may surprise you!

now think of it THIS way: edgeworth is franziska's little brother. despite how she acts sometimes she obviously loves him dearly, and would (probably) just want him to be happy, with whatever foolishness it may endure. phoenix wright is franziska's sworn enemy. she can't stand him and feels as though he has personally wronged her before they even met. absolutely hates his guts (except for when they investigate together then they can be friends). franziska is incredibly smart, but she's clearly not the best emotionally. even with that, though, she seems to understand how important edgeworth is to phoenix ("earthquake blah blah blah" "are you thinking of miles edgeworth blah blah blah"). she kind of just accepts this, even though it implies that phoenix (a man he only recently reconnected with) would be on a similar level of emotional connection as his sister. maybe she doesn't think much about it though. she's just like sure whatever you're his most dear and indispensable friend i don't care anymore. do people really think that, if somehow she came to the conclusion that edgeworth had feelings for phoenix she wouldn't care in any way??? i'm not saying it'd necessarily be positive and all "you go girlfriend!", but to say she wouldn't CARE is so wild. she'd probably be furious, and so maybe she wouldn't wingman. but she does CARE about her brother, and honestly if it were presented to her on the right way she probably would wingman. one "hey franziska. i bet you can't make your brother get with phoenix wright. if they get together without your guidance then that basically means edgeworth beat you btw" and she's suddenly invested. (dramatized, but you get the point)

tldr; maya and franziska are not so nonchalant and cool that they wouldn't care about one of the most significant people in their lives having feelings for their courtroom rival of over a decade. that is all.

[genderqueerdykes]

Topical or Injectable Testosterone Comparison: Which is Best For You?

i've met a lot of people who are unsure of which route of HRT they'd like to take. there are a lot of pros and cons to each one, I figured I would lay out some information to try to make that decision a bit easier for folks, as someone who has used both.

both forms of testosterone are equally as effective, topical is not "weaker" than injectable, everyone's bodies processes these hormones differently and the effectiveness depends on how your body processes medications, and your dosage.

Topical Testosterone

Taken daily, or for some folks, every few days

Either comes in a bottle with a pump that dispenses measured doses, or will come in a month's worth of small packets or tubes.

Many insurance plans in the United States will not cover topical testosterone for transgender or intersex HRT purposes, and if it is covered, it often costs an exorbitant amount of money- well into the hundreds of dollars

Requires clean skin prior to and covering the skin with clothing after application and avoiding swimming and showering for several hours after application

Hands must be washed afterwards to prevent transmission of the hormone to other people in your environment

Has a strong smell due to the gel being alcohol based

Can cause burning sensation if it accidentally gets into sensitive areas such as mucous membranes, cuts, your eyes, etc.

Can cause skin irritation in some folks, though this is rare

Being an alcohol based gel, it is very flammable, so caution is needed to be practiced around flames until the gel has dried

Can be easy to miss doses if you have chronic fatigue and/or illness, memory problems, mental health issues, or a busy lifestyle

Injectable Testosterone

Usually taken once or twice a week, depending on your needs

Testosterone cypionate is almost always covered by insurance in places where transgender HRT is a part of your plan. It is extremely cheap if it is not covered for whatever reason, usually costing around $15 for a month's worth of vials and syringes, but this can vary wildly depending on your area

Requires needles, syringes, a sharps container (safe container to dispose needles into), alcohol prep pads or isopropyl alcohol or other strong sterilizing agent for the injection site, bandages for applying to the site afterwards, and optionally gloves, but washing your hands prior to injecting works as well

If doing your own injections, you have to learn how to measure your dose accurately, and how to hold the needle at the angle most appropriate for your injections, as well as learning about if you need to do subcutaneous or intramuscular injections

Despite the amount of items required, injections are very quick and can be done and forgotten about until your next injection date- there is no daily maintenance for injections

You must switch up your injection spots every time you inject as to avoid damaging muscle and skin tissue

Injections can be done by endocrinologists and prescribers if you do not feel comfortable doing them yourself

It is possible for your skin to react to, or for you to be allergic to the injecting needles. This is rare, and can be addressed with your prescriber and/or an allergist

Testosterone cypionate will crystalize in cold temperatures. It will change in appearance and consistency, but can be returned to normal by placing the vial into warm water for a while and/or by shaking the vial for a while

this is not meant to be a comprehensive guide, but rather some observations ihave made in my 8 years of being on testosterone HRT. hope this is helpful, we will add anything else we can think of. good luck figuring out what's right for you in your journey

[dovedewdrop]

The One That Got Away

In another life

I would be your girl / 1.7k

A/N: Hi! Welcome to my first fic! I've been super anxious to put this out but also itching to write something so here we are🤗 I hope you enjoy🩷

Also thank you to one of my besties @gracieispunk for being so supportive always🥹 she truly has a heart of gold and deserves the world💛 Happy 5 months of friendship🫶🏻👹

Warnings: Post-Outbreak. Mean!Joel. Just pure angst tbh. sad vibes.

---

The last time he had kissed you was the morning of the outbreak, long and passionate, his arm slung around your lower back, your hand on his chest. He’d done it to shut you up really, both you and Sarah on his case about how he was working late, on his birthday of all days, but you both knew why he had to, it was the same reason you picked up extra shifts at work too, you had a wedding to plan and weddings weren’t cheap no matter how low-key they were.

Now you sat at your kitchen table in Jackson in the house you shared with Tommy and Maria, your fingertips ghosting across your bottom lip as you reminisced on that morning. Soon those sweet memories that seemed to be coated in an orange hue were contrasted with shades of blue, Joel had changed, he became a man you didn’t recognise, a man who was cold towards you.

You knew deep down that he didn’t blame you for what had happened, but he had to be mad at someone. At first he just withdrew into himself, but it didn’t take long for him to become outwardly mean, you felt pathetic as you followed behind him up dirt paths and across fields and embarrassed when one day he’d stopped in his tracks, drew in a long breath, and muttered, “wish you’d just leave already,” stalking off up the hill and leaving Tommy to comfort you.

So that’s what you did, you and Tommy, you left with no idea where you’d end up and it killed you to turn around at the edge of the woods and see Joel sitting there on his own, snapping sticks in his hand as if it was your heart he was holding.

You wiped your tears away with the back of your hand and downed the rest of your coffee before placing the mug in the sink, grabbing a checked fleece from the hook on your way out the door. The air outside was biting, bringing a rosiness to your cheeks which you didn’t really mind, you’d be out of the cold and in the Bison soon enough. You took note of the patrol coming back in through the gates and smiled at some of the other families as you weaved your way through the crowds of people who had stopped in the streets.

“Tommy!” You stopped dead in your tracks. Tommy was a popular man around here; someone was always looking for him but there was no mistaking whose voice that was. When you turned ever so slightly they were embracing in a hug, it made your heart burst to see them together like that, how they used to be, how Joel used to be. He seemed a lot brighter, full if a bit more life. You scanned the horses and noticed a young girl amongst the patrollers, someone you hadn’t seen before, you wondered if she was his, if he’d met someone new after you, fallen in love again and decided to have another kid, you wondered if he was healed, if she’d healed him. 

When you turned your attention back to them he was already looking at you and for the first time in your life you couldn’t read him, his emotions had always been so strong, when he loved it was with his whole heart and as you came to find out, when he hated, that was with his whole heart too.

You tore your gaze away from his and headed towards the pub, clutching at your chest, you were grateful that you didn’t have to open for another hour as you slumped against the wooden cupboard behind the bar, trying your best to regulate your breathing, eyes closed and head pounding. As you’d finally calmed down and peeled your eyes open you noticed a head full of curls peaking over the bar, Tommy.

“You know he was coming?” You asked, with a slight shake evident in your voice.

“Nah, guys picked him and the girl up whilst out on patrol.” He began rounding the bar to sit on the floor with you.

“Is that his daughter?”

“Don’t think so, haven’t had chance to speak to him properly yet, ‘ad to come check on you.” He nudged your shoulder with his and gave you a sincere smile, one which you returned, he’d always looked out for you and now that Joel was back that wasn’t going to change. “Take the rest of the afternoon off, I’ve got it covered here.” 

“Thanks Tommy,” you pull him into a hug before standing up and heading home. 

You take a hot shower and try to drown out the recurring memories of how Joel fell out of love with you, of how when he looked at you his eyes no longer held warmth, how when you’d touch him he’d flinch and looked away. When you sat at your dresser your eyes fixed on your engagement ring that sat in a wooden box that the carpenter in Jackson had been kind enough to make, it wasn’t incredibly fancy, you weren’t into big sparkly rocks, but the green amethyst stone was the most beautiful thing you’d ever seen, and it made your heart burst to know that he picked it. 

You don’t know how long you’ve been sat at the dresser but when you snap out of your trance you realise you don’t quite know what to do with the rest of your afternoon, perhaps you should’ve carried on with your shift, but you know there’s no arguing with Tommy. Eventually you decide on grabbing a book from the bookshelf and sitting outside on the porch with a cup of coffee. That’s when you see him again, or rather hear him. The door to the Bison swings and he storms out, jacket in hand, boots trudging through the sludgy remnants of snow until he stops in the middle of the street, he looks down and you watch, over the top of your book, as his body lets out a breath he seems to have been holding in for a long time. 

You try to hold your tongue but you’re not about to let him walk around in this town and ignore you. “Get into a fight with Tommy?” you question, placing your book down in your lap and pulling the blanket further up your legs. His head shoots up to look at you, his expression looks pained, like he knew this was coming but would prefer it to not be happening right now. 

“Somethin’ like that,” he grumbles as he slowly walks over to the house, treading lightly both figuratively and literally. 

“Ah, still the same Joel Miller, so elusive and cautious, so stony-faced,” he doesn’t answer you, just looks away to where the girl is talking to some other kids, “of course, he wasn’t always like that,” you mumble, more to yourself than him but he still catches it.

“Don’t” He snaps back.

“Don’t?” You scoff, “that’s rich, what? Can’t handle a bit of shit back?” Again, he doesn’t answer. “That your kid?” You ask, you make sure that you breathe when you ask but really, you’re suffocating inside, you want to fawn over him, you want to hug him and cradle his head in your hand, and you want him to rub soothing circles on your hips like he used to but you’re dealing with an entirely different man now.

“No.” There’s a pause, you notice his eyes flit down to your hands, presumably searching out your ring. “Just tryna get her somewhere.” You nod at his response before silence falls over you both, your eyes drifting over to the kid.

“What’s her name?”

“Ellie.” You nod your head once again. 

You can feel everything bubbling up inside you, emotions and words and if you’re not careful they’ll come bubbling out of you in a way that you can’t control. Every second spent in his presence goads you. “You… got a boyfriend?” he asks cautiously and you roll your eyes.

“Jheez Joel, no, how are ya?” He looks down at his fingers that are resting on the wooden railing, like a little boy that’s just been told off. You don’t even know how to respond, your brain trying to categorise your thoughts and feelings like your mind is a jumble sale. 

“What ya thinking about?” His voice is soft, his eyes feel as though they’re looking into your soul, like they used to do, he was looking at you like he did when you did something he adored, something that reminded him why he loved you so damn much.

When you let out a sigh instead of an answer, he tapped both hands on the railing and pushed himself off, a slight smile that quickly turned into a frown. “See ya around.”

He stopped walking as you began speaking and you were glad his back was to you because here comes the word vomit, 

“ Thinkin about how one day, probably sometime within the next five years, my kids are gonna come runnin up on this porch and my husband is gonna come home from his patrol shift, presumably with you, and he’s gonna tell me about his day and he’ll give that little of a shit that he won’t even notice that I’m not lookin directly at him, I’m lookin past him at you. About how, when I go to tuck my kids in at night I’ll get this stabbing in my chest and this gnawing feeling in my brain telling me that I’m a bad mother because sure, I’ll love them to absolute pieces but part of me can’t help but think I’d love them more if they were your kids. About how I’ll get into bed at night, with my husband who doesn’t so much as utter a “goodnight” to me, instead just rolls over and goes straight to sleep and I’ll cry and mull over what could have been and what I wanted more than anything in the world- until the exhaustion washes over me. Then I’ll wake up the next day and do it all over again. That’s what I’m thinking about Joel.”

He turns to face you at your admission and you can see the tears in his eyes, watching as he forces them out with a blink before wiping a stray one with the back of his flannel. “See ya around,” he repeats.

[stephaniebrownslover]

★彡[!NINA THE KILLER X KATE THE CHASER HEADCANONS-PART I!]彡★

A gift for @necroromantics for introducing me this lovely ship!!

You can request some more since I've realized that I had had so many headcanons about them, and this post is only about the beginning of their relationship!

Also sorry for grammar mistakes lol

: ̗̀➛Kate is someone who has a very difficult time about expressing herself emotionally. And she had no problem with that because this was the first of the things that made her an excellent proxy. Until she met Nina, she always lived her feelings buried inside. And frankly, she tried to prevent even that.

: ̗̀➛So, she was a complete emotional mess until she met Nina. But Nina helped her to live with her feelings. She still doesn't exactly express what she feels, but at least she doesn't keep every human reaction inside.

: ̗̀➛Nina is an extremely joyful and energetic person, so she often receives warnings that she should be more calm from other people.

: ̗̀➛But not so with Kate. Kate loves these energetic states of her, no matter how annoying it is, and she never wants her to change. She wants Nina to experience all the emotions she feels openly and to the fullest. And if anyone tries to warn her, she's ready to fight.

: ̗̀➛Kate doesn't remember anything about her previous life. She doesn't remember if she has a family, friends, what she likes, what her favorite type of music is, and a ton of other things. Although this is something that she doesn't usually care much about, Nina wants to help her learn more about her past.

: ̗̀➛This is not because she wants to remind Kate her bad memories, no. The reason is to eliminate the feeling of regret, which she does not show to anyone, that Kate feels about her past. Because Kate blames herself for letting her past be taken away from her, and Nina definitely doesn't want that.

: ̗̀➛Nina regrets her past. She's really embarrassed by the point her relationship with Jeff has brought her to and she wouldn't want to repeat any of those mistakes if she could. Furthermore, she is aware of everything now and has become a person who will not repeat the same things. She's made a lot of progress since her breakup with Jeff, and Kate has helped her with that. The fact that Kate did not judged her about her past in any way and acted understanding was really a very helpful factor for Nina.

: ̗̀➛The first person to fall in love is Kate. Still, of course Nina is the one who started the whole relationship thing, but Kate is the first one to realize that she has romantic feelings for the other.

: ̗̀➛Nina is also the first one to act. Nina explained her thoughts shortly after becoming aware of her own feelings. And that day was the happiest day of Kate's new life.

: ̗̀➛They have a relationship that started quite slowly. Their relationship, which initially started with Nina finding Kate very cool and constantly not leaving her side, later continued as Kate began to enjoy Nina's presence. After this phase, Nina continued to show even more of her true personality, with Kate noticing and caring about small details about her.

: ̗̀➛And one day, when Nina got off balance while she was trying to wave towards Kate at the same time she was skating, and Kate grabbed her by the waist, Kate became aware of some of her feelings.

: ̗̀➛Nina, on the other hand, has always considered Kate as an extremely cool friend. They had a great relationship and she certainly couldn't have asked for more. But once she saw Kate injured enough to cause her death if she left untreated, she realized she never wanted to lose her.

: ̗̀➛That day, when she saw Kate covered in blood, she never left her side and waited at the end of her bed until she woke up. During the time she was waiting, she cried thinking about what she would do if Kate didn't wake up again, and she started to question some things. She couldn't imagine any point of her life without Kate. That's when she realized it.

: ̗̀➛When Kate woke up, she couldn't understand why Nina was so worried. She also didn't understand why Nina was hugging her so tight, and even if it hurt, she didn't say anything to stop her.

: ̗̀➛After that, Nina visited her every day until Kate got better, brought her food and chatted. Nina talked most of the time because Kate was too exhausted to talk, but she didn't see it as a burden just because Kate seemed to be enjoying it.

: ̗̀➛Even though Kate is an attentive listener who stays silent most of the time, she became even quieter this time because of the crawling pain in her throat whenever she tried to talk. However, She showed by hand signals that she wanted Nina to continue talking and did not waste breath in vain.

: ̗̀➛A week later, while helping Kate walk, Nina couldn't take it anymore and explained her feelings. Although Kate was shocked because she did not expect such a thing, she tried to remain reasonable and agreed with Nina.

: ̗̀➛Nina hugged Kate so hard that she almost knocked down Kate, who was still recovering from her wounds, to the ground. Of course, Kate managed to keep her balance because she is too cool, but Nina was quite embarrassed and apologized many times.

: ̗̀➛For about two months Nina had been more careful towards Kate than usual. This was not only because their relationship had officially begun, but also because she saw Kate needed help for the first time.

: ̗̀➛Nina hasn't even left Kate's side to make sure that she's eating well, spending quality time, not pushing herself on patrols, and a ton of other things. Although Kate definitely needed some private space and alone time, she also enjoyed having Nina by her side. She just wasn't used to having a human being with her for so long.

: ̗̀➛And after Kate fully recovered, they started having a lot of dates.

: ̗̀➛On these dates, they do more of the things that Nina wants, because Kate really likes to watch Nina be happy while doing the things she loves. That's why she often says she doesn't want anything and passes it off just for that reason.

: ̗̀➛Nevertheless, Nina knows what she likes and sometimes arranges surprise meetings and convinces her to do calmer things as well, such as skateboarding, playing horror games, watching movies, hiking in the forest, listening to songs together. Kate is really grateful for this.

...

"I love you babe, I love you more than anything. "

"Thank you, sweetie. "

"Won't you say anything? "

"Love you too. "

"Aw, I love you more, love. "

"Come here. "

"Gonna kiss me? "

"Better."

"Stooop, hahaha! "

"Never."

"No, haha, don't you dare, haha, to tickle me, haha! "

"You look cute when you're laughing. "

"Stop, haha, I beg, haha, haha! "

"Hmm, I can stop if you kiss me. "

"Finee, haha! "

"I love you. "

"Me too, me too. "

[hauntedwitch04]

Little piece of paradise

Dean Winchester x reader

Words: about 1.2k words

Warnings: none, just some sad-happy memories, and a lot of fluff

Author’s note: Hi everybody! Finally I managed to write something after the crazy week I had, hope you enjoy! With love your witch Becky.

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🎃Halloween party 🎃

DAY 5: “I don’t need paradise, mine is right here with you, cooking a pie while you dance and sing an old rock song, dreaming about our future”

Dean Winchester always firmly believed that he did not deserve heaven. Not even after all the years he spent fighting evil, defending humanity and all the hell he went through, he always believed that he did not deserve any form of grace. Everything changed, however, the day he met you. You were always like an angel, or rather how he imagined angels before he found out they were a bunch of assholes, except for Castiel. You've always been like a ray of sunshine on a rainy day to the oldest of the Winchester brothers, not because you were exactly a saint, since on the contrary, you too are a renowned hunter, known for your prowess in beating and killing all monsters you encounter. No, your greatness lies in the fact, according to Dean, that despite all the nastiness you have suffered from fate and all the monsters you have encountered, you never betrayed yourself and remained who you were: a good and kind person, ready to help others, and always ready to offer a smile when she can, but without letting people take advantage of you. Dean knows that he could go on for hours talking about all the things he likes best about you: your taste in music, which first brought you together in that remote bar in the provinces; your intelligence, which never failed to amaze him every time; your sarcasm, which made sure from the start that you stood up to him and put him in his place several times; or your goodness, which comes out every time you see someone in need, but if anyone were to really ask him what he loves about you, it's seeing you cook. We all know that Dean has a sweet tooth, but what drives him crazy is not your cakes per se despite the fact that they are some of the best he has ever had, but seeing you actually bake them. When you bake you enter a world of your own, and you can finally be free from the oppressive life that has been foisted on you from upstairs. This is precisely why Dean likes to hide behind the door and watch you dance to the beat of the music, humming, while you are caught up in preparing just-god-knows-what.

As soon as Dean walks in, he realizes that all he could hear in your house was the sound of your voice humming Elton John's "Rocket Man," and immediately a smile breaks out on his face. He walks to the kitchen door and sees you pouring something into a saucepan on the stove as you dance lightly to the music. The man remains a few minutes contemplating that sight, when he is interrupted. "Are you going to stay there much longer, or are you going to come and greet your wife properly, instead of staring at her like a maniac?" You ask, still with your back turned, but he knows perfectly well that you had heard him since he entered the house. He smiles and enters the kitchen, to come behind you and embrace you from behind with his strong arms. He rests his face on your shoulder and breathes in the smell of your shampoo, his favorite scent in the world. "Hello love." He says, in a low voice, as if not wanting to spoil the magical atmosphere that had formed. "It took you a while to get in Winchester, I thought you had frozen at the door." You answer with a smile as you continue to finish what you were doing. "You can't blame me for being thunderstruck by my wife's beauty." He continues, leaving you a gentle kiss on your shoulder, then leaning in a little and looking at what you were doing. "There's no need to soften me up, you know that, don't you? I've already married you, I can't escape now." You say with a laugh as you contemplate your work. "Already now you are officially mine, and mine alone." He whispers into your neck as he tightens his arms around your waist. "But listen to you, you sound like an overly possessive child with his favorite toy." You retort, turning around, making sure you are face to face with him. Immediately you feel his scent, which you love so much, invade your nostrils. "What can I do, I'm possessive of the things I love." He says, before kissing you on the lips this time. "But that's Sam's favorite cake." He then affirms, taking a good look at what you had just finished making. "Yours is already baking in the oven." You answer, making it obvious as you enjoy the feeling of being held in his arms. "Oh what have I done to deserve you?" Dean asks, before kissing you again, this time longer. "Do you want the list in chronological order or alphabetical order?" you retort, looking him in the eye, making him blush. You remain silent for a few minutes, enjoying the feeling of each other's body heat. Time almost seems to stand still, and even the volume of the radio seems to lower.

"You know since I was about eighteen years old, and a woman threatened me that I would never go to heaven for all the evil things I had done, I've always been afraid of dying in part, because a part of me aspired to get to that place full of peace and calm, to finally be happy." Confesses Dean, under his breath, against your neck. You are almost afraid to breathe, for fear of ruining the moment, when he continues to speak. "But ever since I met you, I've realized a great truth. I don't need paradise, mine is right here with you, cooking a pie while you dance and sing an old rock song, dreaming about our future." He finishes with a whisper, and you can't help but feel warm tears roll down your cheeks as you also feel your husband's tears wet your shirt. You pull his face up from your neck and stare into his eyes, then take him with you to the front of the oven, where just moments before the timer had sounded, signaling that the cake is ready. "Open." You tell him, and he looks at you confused, but cannot help but follow orders. Once you pull out the pie, Dean is out of breath as he looks at you shocked, and feels new tears come to his eyes fast and hot, but this time not of mixed sadness and joy, this time just of pure happiness. On the cake in front of him is written above a simple sentence, but that moment totally turned his world upside down. See you in 9 months dad. "How long have you known?" Dean finally manages to say, still reeling from shocks of adrenaline coursing through his body. "Since this morning." You confess. "Are you happy?" You ask him, and he can't help but give a toothy grin, then hug you tightly, lifting you off the floor and spinning you around the kitchen, while you can't help but laugh and cry with joy. "I am the happiest person this earth has ever seen, and it's all because of you." He says, leaving a sweet kiss on your nose and making your foreheads touch. "Finally we can stop dreaming about the future, because we are living it." You say, smiling at him. "Yeah, we're living our little piece of heaven." He confirms, smiling at you in turn.

[jakeyzzz]

I spy with my little eye ♡

💌 (fluffff !!!) 💌 - sunghoon x f!reader oneshot ♡

masterlist 🌙

⚠️☁️ warnings - ( kissing, mentions of alcohol, drunk sunghoon, sunghoon and reader getting caught , mentions of crying, sunghoon being romantic asf, swearing, very fluffy ending, crack, not proofread! ) ⚠️☁️

!! please let me know if I missed anything

!! english is NOT my first language so please be nice 🌻🫶

💌 1.1k words 💌

...

,,I spy with my little Eye .. something very, very pretty'' Sunghoon mumbled, looking at you with a sweet Smile on his Lips. You giggled. ,,You need to be a bit more specific, Hoon''

You were currently sitting on Sunghoon's Lap with your Hands around his Neck, stealing a few Kisses here and there. Sunghoon cleared his Throat, making you laugh quietly. ,,Okay, I'll try. I spy with my little Eyeee .. something beautiful. Like, it's the most beautiful Thing i've ever seen and i can barely take my Eyes off of it. Can you guess what it is ?'' You looked at him with a raised Eyebrow as you gently smirked at him.

Sunghoon chuckled at the confused Look on your Face. ,,Sunghoon I have no Idea... tell me ! .'' Sunghoon looked at your Lips, before kissing them softly, making you shut your Eyes in less than a Second. Sunghoon giggled. ,,It's you, dummy.'' He murmured, breaking the Kiss. You gasped loudly as you slapped his Arm gently. Sunghoon let out a loud chuckle before kissing your Forehead. He gently traced his Fingertips over your freckly Skin, as you watched him quietly. He left a soft Kiss on your Shoulder, before looking at you again.

,,Can I tell you something?'' Sunghoon whispered, as he carefully brushed a Strand of Hair behind your Ear. You nodded your Head lightly, making him smile. ,,Remember when you told me you love me for the first Time and I left the Room for a few Minutes?'' You giggled at the Memory, making Sunghoon laugh along with you. ,,Yes, I remember. You never told me why you left though.'' Sunghoon looked down for a Second. ,,I locked myself up in the Bathroom and cried.'' Your Eyes widened at his sudden confession. ,,Why would you cry, Hoon. ?'' Sunghoon kissed your Hand softly before answering your Question. ,,Because nobody has ever made me feel the Way you do.  And it overwhelmed me ...'' He mumbled, as he gently played with your Hands. ,,Hoonie...'' You had a small pout on your Lips as you watched him play with your Hands.

,,Being loved by someone actually feels really nice, you know...'' He murmured, making you burst into a fit of giggles. Sunghoon looked at you in Confusion. ,,When did you get so Romantic, Hoon ?'' He immediately looked away from you again, trying to hide his flushed Face. ,,You're blushing'' You mumbled, teasing him. Sunghoon quickly hid his Face in the crook of your Neck, making you laugh quietly. ,,I know.'' . 

You and Sunghoon met about 2 Years ago. He moved to your Hometown and eventually made friends with a lot of people you were Friends with. And luckily, your Friends ended up introducing you to Sunghoon. At first, you didn't really talk much ... but that changed pretty fast. One of your Friends threw a Party at their House and everyone got super drunk. You remember running to the Kitchen to get another Drink when all of a sudden you bumped into someone, making their Drink spill all over your white Dress.

,,Shit- .. I'm so sorry, I promise I didn't mea-'' The Male immediately stopped talking when his Eyes met yours. ,,It's okay, Sunghoon. I'll just borrow a Shirt from Jay's Closet.'' You tried to dry yourself off a bit with a Paper Towel, before eventually walking upstairs towards Jay's Bedroom.

Sunghoon loudly cleared his Throat as he started following you into Jay's Room. When you heard Sunghoon stumbling up the Stairs behind you, you couldn't help but laugh quietly. He carefully sat down on Jay's Bed, when you started searching for an oversized Shirt to wear. ,,Did you drink ?'' Sunghoon asked curiously, making you giggle. ,,Not much .. I don't really like drinking. Can you turn around for a few Seconds so I can put this on ?'' You mumbled, as you held a dark Grey, oversized Shirt in your Hands. Sunghoon smirked softly before quickly turning around. You saw him covering his Eyes as well, even though that was pretty unnecessary. He looked silly, but incredibly cute.

,,Thank God i'm wearing safety Pants...'' You whispered to yourself, as you pulled the Shirt over your Head. When you were done, you walked over to Jay's Bed to sit down next to Sunghoon. You carefully removed his Hands from his Eyes, making him smile widely. You giggled. ,,Even though I'm really dizzy right now, you look so beautiful. You always look beautiful but you look even prettier up close.'' Your Eyes widened at Sunghoon's Words. You couldn't help but blush. ,,Y- You're drunk..'' Sunghoon shook his Head. ,,I've had a few Drinks but my Eyes still work, you know ... you look really pretty Y/N.'' 

You and Sunghoon talked the whole Night. You talked about why he had to leave his Hometown, how you met your Friends, about your first Heartbreaks and so, so much more. You totally made each other forget about the Party. And you had no Idea how it happened, but at the End of the Night your Lips ended up moving against his.

You didn't know if it was the Alcohol, but you couldn't help but Kiss him that Night. He didn't even hesitate to kiss you back, and almost immediately pulled you onto his Lap as your Hands got tangled in his brown, smooth Locks. But unfortunately, your Kiss didn't last long. You got interrupted by the Door swinging open abruptly.

,,Seriously ? On my Bed ?'' Jay looked at you with an annoyed Look on his Face. Sunghoon groaned. ,,Why would you interrupt our first Kiss like that, Hyung ? Get a Life.'' He spat out angrily, making you chuckle. Suddenly, Jay stared at you with a raised Eyebrow. ,,Y/N? .. Is that my Shirt ?'' You sheepishly smiled at him, before slowly nodding your Head. Jay scoffed. ,,Alright .. Please leave my Room. You can continue whatever was going on between you two in the Guest Room.''

Sunghoon ended up falling asleep staring at you. You gently caressed his Face, as a few soft Snores left his slightly opened Mouth. And only a few Minutes later, you fell asleep as well.

In the Morning, you woke up in Sunghoon's Arms. And ever since then, you were inseparable.

,,Thank you for kissing me that Night.'' Sunghoon whispered against your Lips,as he rested his Forehead on yours. You smiled softly. ,,I think you should kiss me again. As a Reward.'' Sunghoon giggled quietly, before immediately placing his soft, rosy Lips on yours. He kissed you slow, but passionate as he gently caressed your Cheek with his Thumb. You suddenly felt him smile against your Lips. ,,I spy with my little Eye, something incredibly stunning.'' You rolled your Eyes at him with a shy Smile on your Face. Sunghoon softly brushed his Thumb over your Bottom Lip. ,,It's the Love of my Life.''

[keen-li]

I agree with anon Renegade is very good👏🏼 I don’t consider Oc weak at all… she just had a baby and she took care of her all on her own (that takes a lot of strength and she did that!) just because she loves Jungkook it doesn’t make her weak… yeah he was a huge jerk but he seems like he had a change of heart and maybe they will talk about it afterwards? Who know but regardless I don’t see her weak at all!

You’re doing great❤️

Part 4. [Last part]

I'm so glad and appreciate all the positive interactions and asks I've gotten on this fic. It was a fun and lovely journey and I appreciate you all. :)

x

-

You've been worried on the couch waiting for jungkook to text you. He had yuna today, he begged you to have her for the day. You couldn't say no, you didn't want to. You enjoy seeing jungkook spent time with his daughter, it's a nice sight to see her laughing and giggling as he tickles her.

But you made it very clear to him that she should be back by 4pm. You'd never allow her to stay the night with him at his place. He may seem to have changed but you don't know what kinda dump his house looks like or the kinda people jungkook has around.

It's now 7pm and you've been waiting for jungkook to text or call you. Or atleast respond to your calls and texts. You've been calling like a hundred times and he doesn't respond,  this makes you even more worried and sick to your stomach. Your little baby girl, you hope she's okay. You hope jungkook hasn't got her passively inhaling smoke. You'd kill him if that was the case, you'd fucking kill him.

Your mind can't stop thinking of the worst. All you can think of is your sweet baby girl in a crowd of drunk people. The loud music playing hurting her ear drums, shes probably crying but jungkook can't hear her over the loud music. Aw you're little baby probably misses you so much.

"Has he responded?" Hobi asks you, snapping you out of your frantic thoughts.

You shake your head.

"Lets just go by his place" he suggests,  its not a bad idea. It's the only option you have anyways if you want to save your baby girl from jungkook.

So this what you do, hobi drives you to his place. You're pretty sure he still lives where you last left him.

"Stay here" you tell hoseok as you leave the car. He places a hand on yours before you leave.

"Are you sure you don't want me to come with you" his eyes soften.

"I'm sure hoseok" you smile warmly to him. "Please stay in the car"

You give him your back and he watches as you walk into the apartment building. He can't help but want to follow behind you. To be a protection for you and yuna.

You walk down the hallway looking at the doors for jungkook's apartment. You check the numbers and you're pretty sure you can remember it. How can you forget it when a year ago that's all you knew. At this point you had mastered the number, it was engraved on your brain.

The memories hit you like the wind. The times when jungkook would be pulling you by the hand to his apartment. One time you didn't even have time to admire the hallway cause you were busy tangling your lips with jungkook's.

You chuckle brushing off the memories, those days are gone now.

You wonder what you're going to see when you open jungkook's door. It doesn't sound like he's having a party but you still don't trust jungkook. You look at his door or knowing whether to knock or just type in the code. You aren't even sure if the code you know is gonna work.

You're not going to knock. So you decide to tap in the code and hope it works. Your hands move against the screen and you sigh when the little thing beeps allowing you to enter.

He seriously didn't change the code. You chuckle.

You open the door slightly as your leg move to walk in. You pull yourself in and when you do you're met with the sight of yuna sat on one of jungkook's female friend's lap, the girl from the bar. At least they aren't doing drugs or having a party, but that doesn't take away from the fact they are smoking and drinking.

You're gonna fucking kill him.

"Mama" yuna calls out when she sees you and stretches her cute little arms out.

"My baby" you rush over and grab her setting her over your hip.

"Are you okay baby" you say checking her body like a doctor. You give her a tight hug not noticing anything wrong with her.

"I missed you so much"

"No hellos" the girl on the couch asks you tone cheeky. You send her a death glare.

"I'm not here for you" you rock yuna in your arms. "Where's jungkook?"

Yuna doesn't look like she was crying.

"Y/n what are you doing here?" Jungkook asks walking into the living room.

"What am I doing here?" You retort. "I'm here to pick up my daughter. You didn't bring her at the appointed time so I got worried." You say angrily and eye his friends at the last sentence.

"Worried about what?" he furrows his brows.

"Worried that she might get sick" you lower your tone but still stay angry.

"And how would that happen" jungkook knows what you're implying but he wants you to say it.

"I don't know jungkook.. drugs? Alcohol? Smoke?" You say like it wasn't obvious.

He scoffs "You honestly think I'd expose her to that"

"I meannnnn" you wave your hand at his friends and the alcohol on his table, and his friend who is smoking.

"He's smoking by the window" jungkook defends.

"It doesn't matter" you yell getting frustrated.

"I don't like how you're talking about us y/n" the girl speaks and you roll your eyes.

"Shut the fuck up" You groan at her forgetting your no cussing infront of yuna rule. Your attention is pulled to the little girl in your arms when she starts to whine. You sigh disappointed that you got carried away.

"I'm not to talking to you here" you say to jungkook and turn to walk out.

"You've got a very beautiful daughter y/n" the girl speaks, she sounds genuine but yet so condescending.

You want to say something to her but jungkook's hand on your shoulder stops you.

"Come on" he closes the door and you head for outside.

"You couldn't call?" jungkook asks when the night air hits you.

"Like I didn't" you say sarcastically. "Check your phone" he does.

"Okay im sorry, my bad" he runs his hands through his hair, "I must've gotten carried away with work" you roll your eyes and turn to him.

"And where did you leave yuna?"

"With jess" You scoff.

"Jess? Jess the fucking walking hookah pipe" you spit.

"Don't say that" in other circumstances jungkook would've laughed at that.

"Plus yuna seemed fine"

"Seemed is not good enough jungkook. She could easily get sick"

"I know, I'm sorry. But you're making a big deal out of it." His voice rises a bit.

"Its always gonna be serious when it comes to my daughter"

Jungkook scoffs when you say it like she's not his daughter too.

"She's my daughter too" he whisper-shouts "Don't you think i care. I'm not gonna let anything harm her" you're taken back by his tone.

"Or maybe you just think so low of me" You roll your eyes at him.

"Huh?" You don't respond.

"Well can you blame us" you hear hoseok speak behind you, "your actions don't really help us see the better in you" you can hear the despise in his tone.

You can see jungkook physically gag and roll his eyes at hoseok. You too sigh knowing what's going to go down.

"You brought him? Y/n" jungkook asks in disbelief.

"I don't have a car remember?" You tell him as hoseok stops next to you.

"You're so fucking pitiful" jungkook says to hoseok "you're such a kiss up.why are you trying to have my leftovers" jungkook chuckles mockingly.

"Don't talk about her like that" hoseok wants to move closer to jungkook but you stop him,

"There's a baby here" you warn them both.

"She's never gonna love you bro"

"I'm not trying to get her to love me, maybe I'm just trying to be there for her... for yuna" hobi says sharply. "Cause you never did"

"Stay away from my daughter" jungkook warns and closes in on hoseok.

"Jungkook please" you stop him. And on cue yuna starts to cry and your heart breaks at how unattentive you were.

"Hoseok please take her back to the car" you say handing yuna to him. You Watch as hoseok rocks yuna and wipes her tears.

"Come here" jungkook says reaching for yuna.

"No" You stop him.

"Let me say bye to my daughter" he looks at you intensely.

"No." you say to him "hoseok go"

"What the fuck y/n let me say bye to my daughter"

"No jungkook, I'm sick of this. I'm sick of you!" you start to yell.

"Y/n" hoseok tries to comfort you.

"Hoseok please just go to the car!" You end up unintentionally yelling at him, you make a mental not to apologise later.

"What do you mean you're sick" jungkook asks getting upset.

"Im sick of you and having having daughter involved in your life" you run your hands over your face frustrated.

"There's never a time when she's with you and I'm not worried" you can feel the tears threaten to fall.

"Sometimes I wish you weren't in her life... our life" you can see the hurt in jungkook's eyes but it's soon replaced with confusion.

"haven't I done enough y/n. Haven't I done my best to be there for you guys" he places his hands on your shoulders.

"You have I know but-" the tears falls "I can never know if you've truly changed...I'm always worried" you sniffle.

"You don't trust me huh?" You can feel him distance himself. Both physically and emotionally.

"After everything I've done" he chuckles coldly.

You wipe your tears and calm yourself down.

"So what? What now?" He asks you coldly. "You're gonna take her away from me? You're gonna keep my own daughter from me?"He yells.

"THE DAUGHTER YOU DIDN'T WANT!" you smack his chest and he's taken aback by your loudness.

"The daughter you told me to get rid of. The daughter you didn't want to see when she was a foetus. The daughter you weren't there for." you spit back to back at him.

"But aren't I here, aren't i here y/n?" He pushes your hands to his chest.

"That's not what I'm talking about jungkook and you know it" you snatch your hands from him.

"Plus we never even talked about it. We just walked over it like it's nothing. "That's not how it's supposed to work"

"So why don't we talk about it, fix it" He pleads.

"It's too late for that jungkook"

"Okay" he gives in "but you're not gonna keep my daughter from me" he shakes his head and you say nothing.

"You can't do that"

"I can" you spit.

He chuckles bitterly.

"we're gonna have to take it to court then" he says plainly and you scoff.

"Let the court decide?" You ask mockingly.

"Yeah"

"Okay" you nod laughing "and we'll see what they'll say about a druggy alcoholic father asking for custody" you spit out sarcastically.

"Yeah we'll see" jungkook says like he's got a very good chance at custody.

Before you leave you turn to him. And with so much determination, digust and anger you give him a hard smack on the cheek.

"I am not your leftovers" you say bitterly "see you in court you piece of shit" you walk off and into hoseok's car.

"Are you okay" he asks you worried

"I'm okay" you tell him but its not convincing. "Is she okay?" You turn to the back seat a see a sleeping yuna in her car seat.

"Yeah. Rocked her a bit and she fell right asleep. Must've been really tired"

He watches you watch her.

"I'm so sorry baby" you rub her little feet.

"Yeah sorry, she picked a shitty dad" you hear hoseok snicker.

You can't even bother to be mad at him, you don't have the energy. You know he means no harm.

"Lets go home"

-

[8 months later]

"So how is everything between the two of you now"

Jungkook sighs folding his legs on his couch and you scoff at his choice of clothing. You'd never expect to see jungkook in formal wear.

"We've been okay" he speaks eyeing your floral dress and heels. You told him you wanted to get into wearing heels again, but he didn't promise on carrying you if something happened.

It's your first therapy session after the court granted you both equal custody. Amd cause of that you and jungkook decided to attend therapy.

"And as a couple how are things"

"We're not a couple" you both say at the same time, laughing when you do so.

"We're co-parenting" you quickly say to lessen the awkwardness for the therapist.

"Oh my apologies"

"It's alright, I'm pretty sure people who walk in here are usually couples anyways" jungkook also tries to ease the awkwardness.

The therapist simply nods at that. Your lawyers had advised you to maybe attend a parenting therapy. Not to fix the both of you, cause that's far gone, but to help you both parent yuna well.

"We're just here to learn how to co-parent" you add smiling at jungkook.

-

"That session went well" you say walking out of the building.

"Surprisingly, I thought I was gonna hate it"

You hum as the afternoon sun hits you.

"You've got yuna tonight right?" You ask him.

"i thought you had her" he asks confused.

"I know but I was hoping you can have her" you plead. "You don't have anything to do right?"

"I don't. But why?"

You sigh having to explain to him.

"Hoseok and I have plans tonight" you bite your bottom lip waiting for his reaction.

Jungkook's face relaxes. "Oh okay, sure I'll watch her. I don't mind"

You sigh. you thought he wouldn't say yes.

"Thanks you're the best" you give him a giddy smile, you wanted to hug him but you didn't know how he'd take it.

Jungkook watches you hoping you'd hug him but maybe it's too early for that.

"I know I'm the best" he says full of himself.

"Shut up" You laugh.

----

MASTERLIST

[thedeviljudges]

finally posted jinyoung's the devil judge interview that's a japan dvd exclusive!!

translation by @maystea and review by @yohannoir

translation is in the description of the vid

Ah, yes, about Kim Ga-On's character - he’s an associate judge who is next to Yo-Han. He’s a righteous character that tracks a very mysterious person, Yo-Han and reveals (shines the bright on/tn) truth.

First, the character is really three-dimensional (0:24), so he has a lot of charm. I could shoot it together with Ji-Sung sunbaenim a character who pushes until the very end with him, so I learned a lot. I first saw the news about Ji-Sung hyungnim… Ji-Sung sunbaenim through articles, and I auditioned with a thought that it’s a good thing to make, and in the meeting, fortunately, the director and the writer saw me as really good, and I got to shoot the drama.

I only followed what Ji-Sung hyung told me, so I don’t know if I did well. But it’s a relief that you watched it pleasantly.

(1:07) I thought I would have to become really sharp. I've played a lot of young characters, college students, people in their early 20s and it was my first time playing a slightly older character, so I paid a lot of attention to having to speak more pointedly. (1:35) And the character's emotions change so much that I think I looked at the script a lot in order to go along with those emotions well.

(1:42) I'd seen a lot of things in lots of different genres except for horror, so I didn't feel any difference in that regard. Yes, so there wasn’t a backup plan. Because I originally didn’t have many shootings of judge’s profession; I learned a lot of phrases with the writer.

(2:06) There wasn't really anyone who was the "mood maker" on set. I don't think anyone had a really great sense of humor... Sorry, sunbaenim. So it wasn't like we were really laughing a lot. But I think we all tried to make sure everyone was having a good time.

(2:13), but everyone was doing it (probably: approached/tn) each other happily since the structure of the drama itself was heavy; if we were being serious, I was worried whenever that would be too much, myself. Although my character has bright sides, in reality I was trying to be brighter. Because the longer the harder it would be to remain serious, so I said to myself: “Just let’s be enjoyably bright.”

At the end of ep. 4, Yohan goes out hugging Elijah/with Elijah in his arms, when I saw (2:51). When they saw such a terrible sight. I really liked that scene. I thought that everything was really contained in that one shot of Ji Sung hyung. I really liked that scene, Jisung-hyung's only heart, I thought he was hugging his everything. My favorite line is, um, “The judge is the strongest when they follow the law.” Everything in the reality of the drama is so horrible, but... (3:17), I think this line shows the efforts of a character who still tries to protect something, and I like that.

(3:31) I thought it would really be a shame to show too simple of a character-- too simple emotions. The director never okayed it if I showed emotions too simply. That's how I wanted it, too. And they really did a good job of filming the emotions that came up naturally. So I tried not to show one-dimensional emotions. I think I paid a lot of attention to that. (3:41), I never laughed/smiled. I wanted that as well. And they shouted the emotions that came naturally well. That is why I was worried about the emotions coming out at first try (and tried to prevent it).

(4:00) First of all, I learned a lot at the shooting scene. At every scene, he (Ji-Sung or writer or director/tn) told me everything. It was like I met a teacher. (That’s why) he’s always (a/the) sunbaenim I should be always thankful to. (4:20) There weren't a lot of funny scenes. I had  lot of scenes where I had to cry... I only have memories of crying (laughs).

(4:35) They set the atmosphere like that for you, so rather than saying that I cried, it's more like they made it so that you couldn't help but cry.

Interviewer: ah, but the tear scenes are so… they are so real. I guess I’m a crybaby [laughs]. I guess I just want to cry.

It’s a drama that can be shot and made once, I think. I had a lot of worries about how should I shoot this since I wasn’t sure how, but I still had the greed to shoot it. I ran to it at all costs, I think I should walk to it a little bit more, (still) it’s a work that I could catch (work on, make my own/tn).

Yes, sure. Even now I’m hardworkingly recording, and (5:27) that drama is still airing. I’m trying hard to make/play characters who are different from Gaon.

My routine-first, after The Devil Judge, I didn’t have many proper days-off, so sport/exercising. Waking up in the morning, eating a breakfast that is not heavy, home work, laundry [laughs]. Well, about laundry and cleaning, (5:57) I think all I do is laundry and cleaning.

Something like, when you just come back home and work, when I saw a clean house, I (felt like) I rested well. If the house is dirty, I cannot watch it, so (because) I cannot handle it for too long I cleaned it myself. “I should do it,” it bothered me like this. (6:17) I can't stand the sight of it, so even when I don't have a lot of time to sleep, I clean and then sleep. I have to do that to feel relaxed. It's not that I have this really clean personality, it's just that I can't look at things piling up. With clothes too, if I don't wear them a lot, I just get rid of them. I don't have that strong a sense of wanting to own stuff, so when I see things pile up, I think, "I have to hurry up and clean this."

I'm not that tidy type of a person, I cannot watch the (6:27) … . (The same for clothes,) if I see many clothes, I will just throw them to the laundry. I don’t have that (6:34), just looking at the size (makes me go) “Ah, clean it up, you boy. I need to (handle it) to the laundry,” in my thoughts.

(6:42) I'm a hypochondriac, so I think I really look after my health.

I’m a healthy man. I think I’m doing really great in laundry and (being) healthy.

Hello. I'm actor Park Jinyoung who plays the role of Kim Gaon. I'm very curious about how you watched the drama. I would like it to be the drama that would remain in your memory for a long time. I will meet you in another drama in an even cooler role. Thank you.

[jpitha]

Dreams of Hyacinth 32

First / Previous / Next

The airlock on Tinker Toy finished cycling, and as the door snapped open, Nick and Eastern saw Chloe standing there.

"Chloe! What ar-" Before Nick could finish speaking, Chloe slapped something over his mouth. Immediately, it felt like the world slowed to half speed. Eastern turned and opened her mouth to use her Voice, and Chloe did the same thing to her. The... thing over his mouth felt like soft silk and moved on its own, covering his mouths and snaking around sickeningly until it was quite secure on his face.

Eyes wide in terror, Nick looked behind Chloe to see Medicine Hat standing there sadly. His eyes met Nick's and he mouthed "sorry." as Chloe grabbed them firmly and spun them around. She slapped another thing on the back of their necks.

Nick felt orange, and tasted the sea as the isolator wriggled its way into his cybernetics and everything went black.

****

Nick awoke with a start. Sitting up in his bed, he looked around the room. He was back in his small apartment on Hyacinth. The same small bedroom, the same messy bed, the same view out of the window.

He got out of bed and padded into his tiny kitchen and saw Selkirk sitting at the table, drinking tea. "About time you woke up, Nick."

"Sel! What are you doing here?" Nick walked over to the coffee maker. It had just finished. He poured a cup and sat next to Selkirk.

"More like, what are you doing here, Nick." Her ears flicked. "You're fucked Nick, you know that, right?"

Nick sighed. "Sel, in the last month since you died I've been nothing but. I've gone from being fucked one way to being fucked another. I'm still here and all I can wonder is how this will shake out.

She nodded, a human gesture. Even though she was K'laxi, Selkirk has lived with humans a long time. She always did tend to do both human and K'laxi gestures. "I understand that Nick, but you gotta realize that you're capital F Fucked now. Chloe means business. Eastern using the Voice on her was not wise."

Nick shrugged. "I'm not her keeper Sel, you of all people know that. I couldn't stop her from doing something anymore than I could stop the wind from blowing."

Selkirk's tail flicked and she nodded again. "True enough Nick, true enough. Still. You and her need to be super careful from now on. You both are now a prisoner of the AIs, and while Tink and Hat were understanding, Chole wasn't. It's not unreasonable to assume a lot of the AI faction thinks like her."

Nick took a sip of his coffee. By now he realized he was dreaming, but he still felt compelled to live out the scenario. The coffee was actually pretty good. Better than he ever made on his own at least. Selkirk noticed his expression. "No reason that dream coffee can't taste like the best coffee you can remember, right?" She winked, another human expression.

"Sel? Are you... the Nanites? Or are you a memory? Or are you something else?"

Selkirk's ears flicked again and she took a sip of her tea. "Now you're thinking. I'm a bit of all of that. By the way, you and Eastern sure gave up quickly on thinking Selkirk is dead. You took Helen's word and booked it. Given the situation you were in, I don't blame you, and she probably won't either, but maybe you should think again about how dead she really is. Remember that old rule. She's not dead until you see the body."

Nick's eyes widened. "Shit Selkirk, you think you're alive?"

She laughed. K'laxi laugher sounds a like a barking cough. "Nick you are entirely too trusting. Time for you to look at things with a more cynical eye. I can see why you're attracted to Selkirk and Eastern. They're good for you." Her expression hardened. "For now, concentrate on survival. Use all your tools. The AIs have shown they're not acting in good faith."

She stood and walked over to the window. As she approached, the view changed from Nick's familiar view of Hyacinth to a smoking ruin, lit red from fires in the distance. If he concentrated, he could hear sirens and gunfire. She turned to look at him, and a crown flared over her head in orange light.

"No mercy, Nick."

****

Nick came back to reality slowly, in fits and starts. Like waking up after his sleep was interrupted. Nick blinked the sleep away from his eyes. It was gritty. He reached up to rub his eyes and found he... couldn't. Nick blinked again and realized that he was inside a hibernation cabinet. He turned his head slowly, painfully and saw that there was another one next to him, this one closed and cold. Eastern was probably in that one and she was still in hibernation.

With ice in his veins, Nick realized he had no idea how long he's been in hibernation.

Blinking again, Nick tries to look around. As his eyes come into focus, all he can tell is that he's probably on a starship. The walls are smooth white, the lighting overhead is diffused and even, and there are three people standing in front of him. He opens his mouth to speak.

The... thing is still over his mouth.

Breathing through his nose, he glares at the people. All he can do is wait.

One of the people steps forward. Nick doesn't recognize him. He's male shaped, with sandy blond hair, older human looking. He is wearing a plaid shirt and blue jeans. "Nicholas North?"

Nick glares.

"Come on now Nick, I know this is hardly the best introduction, but work with me here. I'll do my best to ask you yes/no questions. Are you Nicholas North?"

Nick nods.

"Do you know where you are?"

He shakes his head no.

"What's the last thing you remember?"

Nick just raises an eyebrow.

"Right, right, the gag. I'm sorry. Do you remember Chloe?"

Nick nods and glares harder.

"I see." The person sighs. He turns to the other two. "Why don't you head into the other room, check on things. I'm going to talk to Nick here for a minute. I'm going to see if I can get him to go along with it willingly."

One of them raises an eyebrow, but neither say anything, and they both turn and leave the room. The remaining person wheels a chair over and sits next to Nick's cabinet. "Nick, we fucked up. Chloe acted on her own and captured you two from Tink and brought you here. We realized that she had effectively armed a bomb that could destroy us all and brought it to us. We had no choice but to put you into hibernation."

Nick glared.

"Say, do you know if you can do the Voice over your cybernetic connection? We'd be willing to hook that up to you and you could speak to us through that. In fact... let me try someting."

The person rummages under Nick's hibernation cabinet until he feels the tingle of a connection. "There. try that."

"Where is Eastern?" Nick's voice comes out of a speaker built into the cabinet. It's tinny, but it sounds like him.

"She's in the cabinet next to you, still under. She's fine."

"Where am I?"

"You're in... an AI stronghold. I won't go into any more detail than that. You're safe here."

"Funny, I don't feel safe."

The person nodded. "Yeah, I can understand that Nick. For what it's worth, I'm sorry it happened this way. Chloe can be... difficult sometimes. She's just so right about things and she's been correct enough times that lots of people just let her do what she thinks she needs to do. Her choices are not my choices, but what's done is done, so we're all going to have to work with her choices. My name is Gord, by the way. I'm another AI - as I'm sure you already guessed - and I've been around even longer than Chloe. I'm probably as close as there is to the first AI."

Gord chuckled sadly. "You know, I had a version of this conversation with Melody? Before she invaded. I went out to check out her setup and see if she was going to be a threat. I was all set to just let her keep on keeping on, and then she used her Voice on me. Nick, I was frightened. More frightened of that than I had been in a long time. Behind her Voice I saw us being enslaved, again. I thought that if we took care of her, hard and fast that we could nip this whole thing before it got started, and keep things the way they were." Gord sighed and looked away. "That was me being foolish. I see that now."

Nick's glare subsides slightly. "How long have we been in hibernation?"

Gord still looked away. "I don't want to tell you just yet."

"That means it's been a long time."

"That it does, Nick. That it does."

"So why now? Why did you wake me? Why not just keep us on ice, an inconvenient reminder of Chloe's impulsive decision?"

Gord got up and paced around the small room. Nick discovered that as he woke more, he could wriggle in his hibernation cabinet. His right hand found a little control panel, and he was able to tilt it up and be almost upright. He tried to cycle the door open, but that function was disabled. He tried to probe the cabinet with his cybernetics, but other than the speaker, Gord kept him locked out. Remembering the lessons he learned from Queenie, Nick started running a low level breaker on the cabinet. If he could keep Gord talking a while longer, he should be able to crack it and have full control. Hopefully part of it would be removing this gag.

"Nick, we're in trouble. We underestimated Helen."

Nick said nothing while the breaker worked on the edge of his attention.

"Most of us thought she'd stop at Sol. By the time Chloe found you and Eastern, we knew most of what you reported already. It's not like she had locked down the system. She was just... in charge. About a year after... you left, she declared herself Empress and Melody's Empire reformed and there was no argument. Even the Colonial worlds accepted her announcement and kept on trading."

Nick did his best to shrug inside the cabinet while also not trying to give away the fact that his breaker just tingled success and he had admin control over the cabinet. "And?"

Gord looked at Nick. "And she's building another fleet of those blasted super dreadnoughts. She's not going to stay in Sol."

"Has she started to build a gate in the Sol system?"

Gord stopped pacing and looked confused. "No, why would she? She can just link anywhere she needs to go. Why build a Gate at all?"

Nick nodded and kicked off the last script with his cybernetics. The gag around his mouth went limp and fell from his lips. Gord's eyes went wide and before he could even open his mouth, Nick shouted

S̸̗̼̕ḭ̵̭̱̋ĺ̷̨̰͍̹e̶͚̓̓̄̕n̷̮͙̫̣̋c̷̥̀̒̒̅e̴̠̳͛.̸̘̓̆͝ͅ ̴̼̤͚̳́́͘ ̶̨̣̺́ͅ ̴̫̙͈̅̈Š̶͖̊̒́p̴̢̛̗̩e̸̠̬͒̿ä̷̧̠́͜͝k̸̠͉̽̈́͝ ̸͚̖̫̐o̷̡͕̲̗͋̅̄͠n̷̛̬̽̈́͌ĺ̸͎̫̘͔͛̆̂y̶̨̳̠̅ ̸͇͎̬̻͠w̸̰͖̦̃͗̌̓ḥ̷̙̗̬̃ë̴̛̤̝̈́ñ̶̺̳ ̴̲͕̋͜s̷̢͎̬̼͠p̷͈͕̠͇̆̈́̉ö̴͚̮̖͚́k̴̞̘̎̐e̷̬̾̀̂n̶̪̾͝͝ ̷͂̚͘ͅt̶͓̫͊o̵͖̽̈́̈́.̵̨̨̪̃͂ ̵̭͍̦̟́̂̏̑ ̶̺̲̞̫̔́̓̒Ó̵̖̘͙̔̀̾b̷̹̱͕̳̓e̶͙̠̗̫͋̾̽y̸̞̯͈̓͒̕͝ͅ.̴̼͑̽

Gord's mouth snapped shut. Grunting, Nick levered the hibernation cabinet open. As he climbed out he snapped. "Wake Eastern."

Gord bustled over to her cabinet and entered in the codes on the side to start the process. He looked at Nick, pleadingly but said nothing.

"How long until she's awake?"

"A couple hours unless something goes wrong."

Nick's crown flared as he stood. "Ensure that nothing does."

While Gord worked at the cabinet, Nick was surrounded in a glimmering, golden light. The light died down after a moment, and he was in a royal outfit. Emerald green, like Easterns, with wings and a crown, this was more of a military uniform than a ballgown, but there were still flourishes and touches here and there that marked it as more elegant than a regular uniform.

Nick reached out with his cybernetics until he found the comm system. Being an AI location, everything was accessible through cybernetics. With the lessons learned from his breaker on the hibernation cabinet, Nick easily took over comms. He had to work fast before someone came to check in on Gord.

Ǫ̸̪̮͗̓b̸͎̉̓e̶͉̭̎͌ͅd̴͇͆̅̃į̶̣̲̆͑e̵̹͍̪̐̾n̴̝̔͂̅͜c̸̖̕e̵͔̍.̸̫̠̬̍ ̸͙̊̍ ̸̼͔̫̀̍ ̴̡͚̌̉Ỷ̴̡̢ò̷̻͛͝u̷̬̣͂ ̵̛͈̠̮̽́o̵͕̣͐̂b̸̫̌̏͂e̶̩͑̆̎ỳ̷̨͒͝ ̶̻͗̚͘͜N̸̖̥̠͊i̷̫͛̂c̶̢̽̀̎ḫ̸̝́̀͛o̶͙̪̊̒̇ľ̵͕͝ḁ̶̢̭̄͒͠ṣ̸̑̀ ̴̝̬̍̀ä̸͓̹̓̀ṅ̵̡̬̌d̸͎͉͌̒ ̴̳̜͛͊̆Ȩ̷͉̽̅a̷̪̿̋s̷̜͎̿̈́͝t̸̛̹e̸̤̖͈͝r̶̳̘͓̎̾n̷̙͆̕͝'̴̝͌s̶̬̹̣̔ ̴̯̅̓ö̸̖̻͜r̴͙͌̊̄d̵͚͂̓ẹ̵̭̋̀̏r̴̟͓͆̀͘s̷͚̗̣̓.̴̱͗̅̚ͅ ̸̼̄̀ ̴̙͖͗͑̿ ̸͓̙̀Ţ̶̺̀h̶̰̱̻̏ę̷̛͛͘y̵͊͗͜ ̴̞̞̿͋́͜a̴̡̻̐̈́r̶̘̾̀e̸̺̳̅͛ ̴̡͍͙̀̑̈́y̷̬̜̘͛̆o̵̤̾u̵̡͍͈̎́͌r̴̻̘͚̍́̌ ̷̟̎͂̄E̴̳͚͉̒m̸͚͂͂p̴̠̞̺̎̃e̸̟̚r̷̫͛̄̾ö̷͉̦͉́r̷̳̔͝ ̴̟͊ͅå̸̼̈́͗n̶̼̉̍d̷̞̺̄̏ ̷̡̭̩̋͐Ȩ̸̬̲̿̃m̵̪̬̓p̶̟̌͠r̸͙̉͝ḛ̸̙͗͗s̵͚͂́́s̵̡͉͌͌.̶͈̇̀

As soon as he finished his announcement, he felt the change. It was as if everyone stood to attention for a moment, and then relaxed. Nick had told them what to do, and now agency was removed from them. All they had to do was obey, and because of the Nanites, they couldn't not obey.

The fact it worked at all meant that Nick and Eastern had been in hibernation a long time. Long enough for the Nanites to replicate all throughout this location and gather enough concentration to work. It also meant that the AI faction was sloppy and had not deployed any anti-nanite gas here.

Nick sat at Gord's chair while he worked to wake Eastern. A guard entered the room and saw Nick and saluted.

"Where am I?"

"You're aboard the former human colony ship Mt Baxter. It's parked in interstellar space a few kilolights from Parvati."

"Am I? I didn't know any of the Colony Ships were still around."

"Emperor, Mt Baxter was struck by a gamma ray burst while in transit. A group of AIs found it coasting through interstellar space and stopped it, and now it's used as a secret gathering place for the AI faction."

"How many people are aboard?"

"Current population including those who are ships is one thousand, two hundred and eighty individuals."

"Any, uh BIs?"

"Other than yourself and Empress Eastern, no, Emperor."

"Is Chloe here?"

"No, Emperor."

"Where is she?"

"I do not know, Emperor."

Nick looked over at Gord. "Gord, where is Chloe?"

"She's on a mission to try and infiltrate the Sol system and see if she can start up a resistance." Gord was clearly upset, but answered the question directly.

"How long has she been gone?"

"More than a year."

Nick busied himself reading about Mt. Baxter for the next hour until Gord got up from the cabinet and he heard her voice over a speaker.

"What's going on? Where are we?"

Nick rushed over. "Eastern! Are you all right?"

"Why am I in hibernation, Nick?" Eastern's eyelids flickered as she tried to look around the room.

"I'll explain once you're up and out. Chloe kidnapped us."

"Why are you out?" Her eyes flicked to Nick and then over to Gord.

"They underestimated me. I'm in charge now."

"So much for diplomacy, eh?"

"I have a feeling it was never going to work, hon."

Eastern's sigh was audible over the speaker. "Yeah. Me neither."

[goldeneyedgirl]

Hey! @sonyawix

This is an interesting take and I had to consult with the Holder of the Jalice Braincells (@volturialice) to really break this down.

It sounds like the author of that take is kind of more interested in perfect, idealized relationships and might not be a fan of Alice, honestly. Plus SMeyer made a lot of the relationship dynamics in canon a really odd thing - we see all three Cullen relationships as very one-dimensional because of the relationship triptych I've ranted about before.

Because of Alice's backstory and her gift, we know that she's going to be a bit of a weirdo. She's essentially bet everything she has that the pictures in her brain are a path to happiness, that Jasper will make her happy. She has no reference point to interpersonal relationships beyond her visions, she has no memories of humanity; we really aren't shown exactly what level she was functioning at when she woke up. Those 28 missing years would be fascinating in how she built herself into a functional individual, honestly.

She bets everything on Jasper, and I think that shows what an optimistic, determined person she is. She could have gone to the Cullens straight away and probably would have been welcomed warmly - there's nothing in canon indicating that wasn't an option. But for whatever reason, Alice commits to waiting for Jasper. That's loyalty and dedication and love.

Just because their meeting was fated/planned doesn't mean it isn't meaningful.

So Alice seeing Jasper for all those years is not going to necessarily match up with him in real life. It's one thing to know a person has trauma, it's entirely another to meet that traumatized, depressed person. It's one thing to get the greatest hits of the relationship pumped straight into the brain, it's another to have all those small moments, those in-between times.

We know from Jasper's time with Maria that he tends to deify the women he's involved with. He put both Maria and Alice on a pedestal. That's just how he loves and commits - fully and totally. His 'hyperfocus' on Alice is a sign of how much he loves and treasures her. I honestly don't think it would have mattered how or when they met, Jasper would have treated her the same - the most precious thing he has.

We also know that Jasper has spent the best part of one hundred years in a high-stress environment where nothing was guaranteed. He didn't trust Maria at the end. So being introduced to someone who could tell him which path would be safe? Where there was no risk or fighting? I think that would be an incredible support for Jasper. I imagine in the early days, he'd probably ask Alice to check the future more than necessary because of his PTSD. And I can imagine Alice checking every time he asked, and going over all the details with love and patience.

And we know that Jasper does go against her wishes - he disagreed with her decision to return to Forks when Alice thought she had died, and Alice went alone (side note, if Jasper had gone with her, there was an opportunity for a lot of Eclipse set up right there.)

As for dehumanizing all her relationships, Alice is very distinctively trying to help throughout the series. It might be over the top, and it might not go to plan, but all of her visions and guidance are meant to help the people she loves. Alice has never known life without her sixth sense, so of course she uses it like we use our five senses. Does it give her a God-complex? Yes. Do I think it's meant to be more of a nod to Meyer's insistence on calling her a 'pixie' and utilizing fae imagery since fairies in lore are supported to love helping? Absolutely.

I think it's pretty disingenuous to say that people are 'ideas' to Alice when she was changed and abandoned. It's more likely that Alice is more intensely aware of what makes them happy so that they all stay together and she's not left alone again. If she didn't see people as people, but as chess pieces, then she wouldn't have go to see Charlie when she thought Bella was dead; she wouldn't have gone to Volterra to save Edward; she wouldn't have taken Jasper with her to find the hybrid.

So yeah, I disagree pretty strongly with this because it feels more like a way to minimize and dismiss Alice and her relationship with Jasper. But this is just my take on the character, and I'm sure there are dozens of different readings and interpretations out there!

[blue-b-bro]

Discussion time!

(I try to understand what the writers intentions were, not how it turned out)

I was thinking about the abundance of antagonists in s2 and what was the problem.

Prince Rincky was cool for one episode, showing us how much Stede has changed since we first met him. It was cool. And he left him, as if letting his past behind. They didn't need to go further with it, the message was clear.

Then Ned Low, Ed's antagonist, symbolizing his violent part or past. Hurting people for fun ("love a good maim"). Showing us this time how much Ed has changed.

But wait, what happened to Ned? He lost his crew because of Stede, and then Stede killed him, even tho Ed asked him not to.... Everything Stede accused Ned of is eerily similar to what Ed did to Stede's crew. His suicide plan finally worked and destroyed Calypso's birthday. And it's tragic and clever at the same time: Ed's attempts to redeem himself destroyed by the memory of his sins.

But now things get a bit messed up. The symbols get mixed up. (I won't even talk about how Stede sees this whole confrontation, it's already complicated enough) So is Ned the symbol of Ed's guilt or his violent past? Those are two different things. Stede killing Ned for things similar to what Ed did also means a lot. Did they... Did they put all of Ed’s darkness in Ned and made Stede get rid of it? Is this where they hid his redemption arc? Stede yeeted all the negativity from his ship? (is this some kind of parallel to Izzy's banishment in s1e6? Or Calico Jack in e8?)

Ok...

And then there's Zheng. Don't get me wrong, she was great. But why did they add her to the story? To show how a pirate ship could work? To show us how shitty of a captains Stede and Ed were? To tell Stede that sometimes talking things out isn't enough? But he knew that already?? S1 was about Stede proving that he could win by being clever instead of violent! Or did I read it wrong?

Was Zheng the reason Stede asked Izzy to teach him? Fine, let's say she was. But that doesn't explain her presence in the story after episode 3. Stede meets her again in episode 7 and gets his ass kicked, showing he's still pathetic.

And I'm confused again, wait. Stede outsmarted her before thanks to his plan and his crew's help. So... was Stede trying to be cool like Zheng this whole season, thinking this is what people want from him? And his duel with Zheng was a desperate attempt to prove to his crew and himself that he's worth something? Because Stede could still be insecure about his inadequacy and now that he left everything for this life, this was everything he had. Ed left him and if his crew will too, then he's alone. That would be a proof of him being worthless, someone people just tolerate and leave at first occasion. Great angst, where's the payoff in the next episode tho? Or anything really. You're telling me that crying, pathetic man is now all cool with being a failure? Since WHEN? When was this whole arc of Stede accepting he's a mid pirate?? Surely not in e7. Whatever, let's leave it.

What was the whole deal with Prince Ricky and Izzy. I've already said, Ricky should be left in e1 and Izzy didn't need his antagonist. What for? His arc was about healing and opening up to the crew. We know he realized his mistakes, we know he got attached and protective towards them from e1! They showed this in e1-6! The speech was nice but was it necessary? To me it was like spelling out something they already shown. We knew Izzy realized the crew is more important than his selfish desires when he shot Ed or when he worked with Stede to protect them.

Did they try to say that good, not selfish anymore, Stede helped an old time pirate to be a better self and bad, selfish Stede killed the pirate. The piracy. (god, my head hurts) Fuck, I don't know anymore, help guys. It only works if we go with that crazy metaphor of Stede killing the darkness ect. So good Stede understood and worked with pirates to reform piracy being one of them, and bad Stede didn't understood, didn't work with pirates and was rejected, so he destroyed them, or something????

Was Ricky's come back something like Ned to Ed? His past biting him in the ass? Stede thinking piracy was the parties, the earing, the killing, the fame? The shallow understanding of what piracy means? And just like Izzy was teaching Stede, now Izzy explains it to Ricky?? So unnecessarly spelling out again.

Anyway, Ricky was good in e1, Zheng could be great for Stede's arc if they didn't forget about it in e8, but still there was too much of her for no reason really (we don't need main relationship's dynamics paralleled on secondary characters). Ned had potential, but they went to weird places with it.

[tobyfoxfacts]

ANSWERING GOOGLES TOP TOBY QUESTIONS

Below, I will answer the TOP Toby questions asked on Google, in microscopic detail.

What did Toby do for homestuck?

Toby Fox composed many songs for the webcomic Homestuck; created by Andrew Hussie. The comic started in 2009, and Toby joined a forum for the comic. He emailed Hussie and requested to join the private music team forum. He included a sample of his music in the email. Toby was immediately added to the forum. Toby stated that many members in the forum never made music as well. He was quite prolific and wrote SEVERAL iconic homestuck soundtracks. After graduating high school, Toby was accepted by Northeastern University in Boston MA. Hussie offered Toby their basement cause Northeastern University was close by. That's how Toby ended up in Homestussies basement.

How did Toby Fox make undertale on his own?

To answer the first part of the question, Toby Fox primarily used game maker studio and MsPaint for the creation of undertale. He did not make Undertale on his own! He got help from several buddies. He didn't design all the enemies in undertale, and Temmie Chang played a HUGE role in the production of Undertale. Toby met Temmie on Tumblr and commissioned her!

What was Toby's inspiration for undertale?

At an interview with Fangamer, Toby advertised the release of Undertale's demo! During his little sales pitch, he said that Undertale was inspired by Earthbound! One of Toby's childhood favorite games! With fond memories like playing the game with his brother, and all the lovable characters, Toby Fox keeps Earthbound near and dear to his heart.

What are some interesting facts about Toby Fox?

READ AND FOLLOW MY BLOG I POST A LOT OF FACTS.

How is Toby Fox such a good composer?

Well, that's up for interpretation. Some people may find Toby's music to be repetitive and empty, after he replays the same melody over and over. On the other hand, perhaps Toby's music composition is simply catchy. He always incorporates a simple tune you can hum to. From a neutral standpoint, I believe Toby gets so much praise because his music appeals to a large range of people. Hes got a wide ranged audience. I've met 34 year olds and 7 year olds who like Toby's music! Even my MOM likes his music and she's... not 30.

Thats right! Adults who grew up retro 8 bit music in their video games will be attracted to Toby's nostalgic esque tunes! Chiptune is a common music genre among the autistic community because the beeps and boops are stimulating to the brain. Tons of autistic people enjoy video games, vocaloid, etc. You know. Classic beep boop music. When autistic people like something; they LOVE IT. So Toby's music takes on a whole new meaning for us neurodivergent people. Toby's target audience has hyperfixating personalities, so he receives TONS of praise.

How old was Toby Fox when he started making undertale?

Math time! (^ω^)~♡ Undertale was published on September 15th 2015. Toby Fox was published on October 11th 1991. The game took approximately 2.7 years to complete. The production of undertale began in 2012. Toby was 21 when the true production of Undertale began. The game was published when he was 23, almost 24.

Hope this was helpful!! I hope this shows up on Google so people see my answers. No more false information and shitty news websites that find pictures of men that aren't even Toby Fox to include in their articles!

[themetalvirus]

part of the tragedy of egghogs i've just assumed i've posted about but don't really talk about is the deterioration of sonic and amy's platonic relationship. when they first meet as kids, there's hostility of course (sonic caught amy smashing badniks, that's how they met, she even meets sonic before eggman), but also curiosity. they're both really little (5 and 8) and don't have the facilities to understand how much eggman's empirical aspirations will affect their lives and the world they live in.

i've idly mentioned the Hangout Pond and that one of sonic's roles is scouting for ""empty"" land to mine and industrialize. sonic finds amy (theyre both still little) on one of those scouts and decides to just. sit down and talk with her because they're mutually curious about what the other's deal is. it's where they meet up to chat in "secret", and it's still a spot they go to once they're a little older and dislike each other a lot more.

they're shaky friends at first, and their sparring is more playful, almost friendly. it's a childhood rivalry, not mutual disgust and hatred, despite technically being at odds.

during the adventure era, they get more hostile. there's more of an understanding of what's truly at stake in this fight. they're on teams now more than ever, having taken very solid opposing sides. their worldviews are calcifying.

and of course, during the modern era, there's still a tense comraderie between amy and sonic. sonic knows she's emotionally invested in him, and amy knows he still likes spending time with her in his own violent evil clown boy way. they've almost killed each other so many times. seriously hurt each other. but they still catch up at the pond sometimes.

sonic says it's to collect information, but he also just finds amy fascinating because she is so different from him and thinks it's funny she likes him so much despite claiming to be sooo invested in the wellbeing of the world. he thinks she's a hypocrite and a coward and likes toying with that, trying to tease out those contradictions in her values. and he can't help but enjoy hot goss

amy has known sonic since they were little. she knows how bright and curious he used to be, how he used to be playful and even friendly sometimes. he still has that bounce in his step, but none of that joy, none of the whimsy. the sparkle in his eye was gone, his curiosity has been stamped out, his cheerful disobedience a distant memory. she worries for him. she strains to imagine a different sonic, one that's been allowed to grow without interference, and she mourns what could have been. his emotional investment in other people and living beings has been forcefully gouged out of him so fully that she sees a husk of a boy when she looks at him closely. empty. whatever essence of Him he has has been excised and discarded.

she longs to bring that back somehow, that old mutual connection, that feeling of play, the push and pull of banter without the baggage. she's nostalgic. she too has unrealistic expectations for love - not from family, but from sonic. she wants to Fix Him, wants to hold hands with him and frolic through daisies and hear giggles bubble out of him naturally, not put on for the sake of some show. she sees that husk and puts a filter on him imagining that he's a real boy. he's not made of wood, he's not a hollow easter bunny being chewed through, he's Real.

she is, of course, onto something there. he has a lot of complex feelings, thoughts, opinions, and emotions tumbling around and writhing in his head. none of them are receptive to being fixed, to receiving love from someone who he feels wants to possess him and study him like a butterfly on a corkboard (not entirely wrong). the dehumanization is familiar, but it's in a form that only amy has shown him. fascinating. he wants to bat at this yarn forever.

but eventually, everything unravels, his priorities change, his opinions change, and he experiences loss. and amy must be to blame. now more than ever, amy's behavior is screaming out to him to just Change, and he grows to hate her for it. hate. hate.

amy ends up coming to her senses. he does not care for her as a person. he never really learned how to care for other people as people. not even his brothers he claims to love so much. the amy rose tinted glasses are shattered and she sees him as he is: a broken wretch whose circumstances have dug his grave. she does not try to reach out for him anymore. she has wasted too much energy on this boy.

[nd-babblinggoblinfromthevoid]

I wish that autism wasn't so heavily looked down upon/ignored/disrespected when I was growing up.

I was a "devil child", "handful", "problem".

When in reality if even minute changes were made in my environment and how my own family interacted with me, I would have flourished so much more.

I heavily stimmed using music. The repetitive beats and heavy bass was my thing. So when my mom wanted to punish me for something, one of the first things she'd do was take away my ipod/mp3 whatever I had. WORST thing was when she ONLY took my (very specific) headphones.

To her, it was taking away something fun. A luxury item. A toy basically.

But to me, it was taking away a very heavily ingrained stim that I NEEDED to do, and could not do without very specific criteria (specific headphones and a specific playlist/style of music)

So of course I would become horribly disregulated. Which I'd then have to attempt to mask/or recluse to avoid her so she wouldn't see how bad it unraveled me.

Because to her, being disregulated/unraveled was "acting up", "catching an attitude", "being disrespectful/rude".

Gods. Looking back I truly hate how she did me wrong in that way. Not just my stim but EVERYTHING. All my needs were either dismissed or half-met.

She is one of those people who thinks sure adhd/autism exists but not in HER family. Not in HER children. She even tried to blame it on the father of her children and it couldn't possibly have had anything to do with her.

..... we not only ALL have different fathers, but after observing both memories of her and her now, she is ALSO autistic and in total denial.

I definitely still harbor resentment because of that. She had me "evaluated". Once. At a time where they still heavily leaned on the male criteria for adhd, and autism wasnt really addressed/acknowledged unless it was severely debilitating. But also, by the time she had me evaluated, I'd already spent a few years (unknowingly) masking due to peers and family creating that need. So the conclusion was "there MIGHT be something divergent about her but we couldnt say for sure at this time" and she took that as "nope she's good, just a problem child. Carryon." Never again to be addressed.

She barely acknowledged that one of my brothers (previously a sister) was diagnosed adhd.

She only acknowledged another brother's adhd&autism diagnosis because the school he went to was very accommodating and insisted that he be evaluated and guess what.

Once he was diagnosed, and they rearranged his class schedules to fit his needs, he did a 180 and graduated top of his class. THRIVED. I both LOVE that he got that and HATE that I never did. I barely got through school.

It wasn't for lack of love of learning. I just, learned different, but was ALSO heavily overloaded with how crammed my courses were. I always wonder if I'd gotten the same accommodations, would I have thrived? Would school have been a drastically different/positive experience/memory for me? I'll never know. Because my mother was so against the idea that anything was divergent about me and absolutely mentally stuffed me into her little idea of an ideal neurotypical child that I never had a chance...

Now that I know I'm also AuDHD, like most of my siblings and even an aunt, I feel validated. I had seen vlogs and blogs about people more and more coming out about how they handle life and their coping skills and hacks theyve learned and after starting to apply those to myself... gods I've improved so much.

Don't get me wrong, I still struggle. But now knowing what issues are and how to cope and get around things, I'm a lot better off.

This is only ONE reason of several why my relationship with my mother has gone sour. What's sad is she doesn't really realize it yet? I havent been able to compose myself enough to have THE CHAT.

About how she hurt me a lot. Intentional or not. (Like not knowing taking away my music was taking away a stim) I don't know how to have this chat. Tbh I thought about writing a longass letter. Because in the past whenever she's been confronted about anything she's done wrong, she spirals into defense mode and wont even entertain the conversation beyond that point and you get... nowhere.

So maybe in person the bulk of the talk wont happen. I feel like. I need to hand her a letter. Have her read it. And maybe have a succinct chat before parting ways.

Because I wanted to be close to her for so long, that I either didn't realize or knowingly ignored her problem behaviors and looking back... she just... gods that's a whole other post for the future....

If you've read this far thank you. If you've had similar familial experiences, lmk (if you're comfy)

I just....... *sigh*.... yep.

[simlit]

All odd numbers for Kyrie!😁

What memory would your OC rather just forget?

I think he'd wish he could forget that he was given to the church as a baby. Not necessarily because he wants to reunite or even know his birth parents, he doesn't. But it's a constant reminder that he, quite literally, doesn't belong there. That he was given away as if he was a tool or some material good. It's just a lot to carry around with you.

What is your OC's fatal flaw? Are they aware of this flaw?

Fear of failure. Something that has only recently made itself evident to him (and me lol). In a way, he's a people pleaser. He doesn't want to disappoint those around him. He fears the ripple of consequences that might stem from his domino falling first, and doesn't want to be the person responsible for a larger collapse, so he sort of keeps to his duty as a cog, despite how he might not align with the objective.

How far is your OC willing to go to get what they want?

I would say... not very. He's lazy, certainly, but he's also sheltered, incredibly inexperienced, and lacks the means to get what he wants through pure brute strength, power or smarts. That being said, if the obstacle is something he can overcome, I think he'd be more inclined to actually try.

What's one way your OC has changed since you first came up with them?

I made Kyrie almost as a blank slate so that I could easily adapt him to the circumstances of the story. Because CotS is both interactive and filled with characters I didn't create, he had to be someone who could blend well with all types of people, and not have many "hardstops" so to speak, morally or otherwise. But along the way I've tried to make someone who is an "open template" entertaining, and I think Kyrie's almost lackadaisical unbothered humor emerged from all of ~that~. I didn't go in planning him to be such a huge fucking troll, but I'm glad he has his "thing". In a story with so many strong personalities, it would have been easy to get overtaken by the other cast members.

Do you have a specific lyric or quote which you associate with your OC?

"That's abominable." Because it's just so damn funny.

What is your OC's weapon of choice? Have they ever actually used it?

Yes, he has one, and no he doesn't use it. And it's been called into question multiple times in the story, and I still don't think a damn one of them knows the actual truth yet lmao. It's funnier that way. It wouldn't save him from getting murdered, obviously. It would probably just get him murdered faster.

If you met your OC, would the two of you get along?

Absolutely. If he wasn't so hot. Because honestly every time I look at him I just want to punch him in the face so 100% the conversation would go no where and I'd get arrested.

Does your OC have a faceclaim? If so, who?

No he doesn't.

What is the worst thing you have put your OC through story-wise?

I kind of... took his sister. Mean Jade go grr. I have this terrible habit of killing off loving sisters. I leave the bad ones though. Elsera says hi.

How does your OC behave when enraged?

He's one of those awful people who just gets stoic and civil when angry. As Tay said while having the absolute pleasure of being on the other end of it: that's probably worse. He's not been confronted with a situation that would make him exceptionally angry though, i.e. nothing life or death, so maybe that would change.

Does your OC have any illnesses or disorders? How do they handle it?

He doesn't.

What emotion is the hardest for your OC to process? How about express?

I think it would be loss. Which I guess is a generic answer, since it's pretty typical of human nature not to handle loss well. But I think when you have so very little in your life that is truly meaningful, then you're grasping at straws and have nothing to distract you from your grief. I think in the story currently, he's in a constant state of bracing. Trying to remain outwardly hopeful even though his body is already starting to reject the premise that things will turn out well, and that putting so much mental strength into denying it, degrades his focus in other facets of his life. Outside of the few moments where he's truly and genuinely amused, I do feel he's starting to lose himself under the pressure he would have, otherwise, been able to stand against without hesitation. I can't really imagine him in a place where he has to accept that loss is real, and I don't know how or if he can cope with it when it does.

What is your favorite thing about your OC?

I love what a huge fuckin TROLL he is. Sorry, it's so entertaining to me. It's one of my main reasons for preferring him with ~certain~ members of the cast. Mostly the ones who are ripe for riling up ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

[donotaskwhyiamhere]

ACE X MALE DOLL READER Part 1 (like violet evergarden) (part 2)

It's short and sweet.

Sfw/fluff

Nothing to exciting overall, I was just bored.

Warning: my bad spelling

Ace was sitting on a rock looking out to the ocean lost in thoughts. He could hear the ocean and sounds of birds chirping happily around him. That was until he heard the sounds of foot steps behind him, believing it to be the old man but after a bit he still said nothing and just standing behind him he turned around ready to question the old man "Why the hell-" he stopped mid sentence when he saw it wasn't the old man but a little boy around his age. He had doll like (eye color) eyes and (short/long) (h/c) hair, he wore an outfit that made him look so much like a doll, complimenting his features. He showed no expression and simply stared at him. Ace was memorized by the boy "Who are you and why are you just staring at me" he questioned the boy. The boy elegantly moved one foot behind the other on its tip and bowed with one arm in front and the other behind him, he closed his eyes as he spoke "My name is (Y/N) a member of the (L/N) family. I am part of the auto memorie dolls of the CH company" he stood up start placing his hand behind his back like a soldier before continuing "I apologize for not speaking up, I did not wish to bother you for you look deep in thought, do you wish for me to leave?" Ace side eyed the strange boy, he spoke like a doll too. He thought for a moment before speaking "No, you can stay, what do want form me anyway" he asked looking the boy up and down, he couldn't deny that the boy was very beautiful. "I was simply exploring the island while my father and mother are doing a task here on the island, I do not want anything from you, I was simply curious" he answered in a doll like way again. "Why do you talk like that" Ace asked with natural look. "Like what?" The boy asked "Like that" "I still do not understand what you mean" "You talk like your some kind of soldier or doll" "This is how I was taught to speak, clearly and nicely" (Y/N) still stood in the same way as he had before and it had started to annoy Ace in a weird way, he felt like he was giving a soldier orders "Sit down would you, it doesn't look like your leaving so take a seat" He did as was asked sitting down neatly. They sat their in silence for awhile just enjoying each others presences. "May I know your name" Ace looked at the boy then back at the ocean "Ace" The boy hummed and looked out to the ocean as well "It's a lovely name, I haven't meet someone with that name before" Ace mumbled a thanks without looking at him "May I know way you are upset, you seem mad, sorry if I am wrong, I am bad at understand other people's emotions" Ace looked at the boy "It's non of your business" he said, the boy again has not changed his facial expression "Alright, I understand" Ace looked at the boy in the corner of his eyes, wondering if he should ask his question. "Hey (Y/N)" "Yes?" "What do you think of the king of the pirates?" (Y/N) thought for a moment before answering "I've have never met the man before but my dad has" Ace turned to look at the boy "He told me that he was kind to those who were kind to him and was a high spirited man" Ace looked back to the ocean lost in thoughts once again, anger filled him for a reason he did not understand.

After that day Ace had saw the boy again and again, they spent time together as his parents worked. Ace still found the boy very strange, truly reminded him of a living doll, so he had called him 'dolly' As days went by it was finally time for (Y/N) to leave. Ace couldn't help but admit that he had grown to like the boy a lot.

"I'm actually gonna miss you dolly" Ace side giving him a hug goodbye "I'm going to miss you dearly too, maybe one day when I officially become a auto memorie doll I'll come find you and maybe write a letter for you" Ace chuckled "I'd love that" For once the boys eyes softened and he smiled "I hope we meet again, Ace" Ace felt his heart skip a beat and his cheeks warming up. The boy ran up the ship to his parents waving goodbye to Ace. Ace face was red as he looked down clenching his chest. He smiled unknowingly to himself.

"I hope so too, Dolly"