#also dick says ‘you can’t bring the dead back to life’

[coconutcordiale]

do not disturb

pairing- jake 'hangman' seresin x female!reader (no use of y/n)

synopsis-

“It’s one hundred degrees in this room,” Hangman defends himself. “I can’t sleep in pants, I’ll die.”

You pinch the bridge of your nose, considering just sleeping in the hallway yourself and ending this torture. “Is your penchant for drama genetic? Are your sisters like this too?”

warnings- 18+ only minors DNI, what's a plot never met her, explicit protected piv sex, lil corruption/innocence kink, choking (pls look up the correct way before doing it), hangman's dirty mouth, size kink (if jake doesn't have a big dick I'm staging a revolt), brat tamer hangman if you squint, inexperienced ish reader (tried but I'm a hoe so idk if I managed it), no kink negotiation here (talk to your partners first irl), safewords not explicitly stated but I promise this is consensual af, excessive pet names, exasperated sleepy friends to lovers

length- 4k this was supposed to be like 1k I don't know blame hangman

an- this is just smut w lil fluff sprinkles. i'm a hangman girl (read: I'm obsessed with glen powell) so I felt some type of way about being mean to him in tailspin & that's why this now exists. also idfk what this even is sorry! hope it's not terrible ok ily bye

Technically, it’s the middle of the night. 

That’s why you’re burying homicidal urges when you hear knocking on your hotel room door. 

Urges that increase tenfold when you open it to see Jake Seresin, rubbing the back of his neck awkwardly in an old Navy shirt that looks way too soft for your sleep addled brain to deal with right now. 

“Hangman,” you greet drily. “Why the fuck.”

Rubbing sleep from your eyes, you’re not unhappy to see him, per se, but it’s well past acceptable social hours. He’ll have to forgive your less than enthusiastic welcome. Part of you thinks you might still be sleeping.

He at least has the decency to look sheepish for waking you up. Well, about as sheepish as Hangman is capable of looking. “Coyote said he was bringing someone back to our room. Can I crash with you tonight? Everyone else is either hooking up or dead asleep.”

Fucking weddings. 

You narrow your eyes. “What if I have someone here?”

He smirks and you kind of want to slap him. 

A testament to your willpower, you sigh instead, briefly wondering if it’s really that bad to force him to sleep in the hallway, before opening the door and stepping to the side. 

“Thanks, sweetheart,” he drawls, letting you feel the heat of his body as he passes by you, just a touch too close for comfort.

“Cool pjs.” He smirks again, raking his eyes up and down your colorful matching shorts and shirt set. 

“Bite me.”

Hangman smiles good-naturedly causing you to idly wonder if anything has ever bothered him in his entire life. 

“You’re real cute when you’re tired,” he says instead of being offended and now you’re debating if you actually should slap him, or maybe yourself for the way his compliment brings heat to your cheeks. 

“Where’s Phoenix? Thought you were sharing a room with her this weekend.”

Your stomach drops as you consider that Phoenix might be why he came to crash in your room, and you try not to make a face at its betrayal. 

“She’s probably in your room with Coyote,” you deadpan to cover up your discomfort, and then relish in the way his mouth drops open in surprise. “Christ, aren’t you supposed to be smart, Hangman? I’m kidding, she met someone at the reception.”

You know you’re being a little more abrasive with him than normal, but you can’t quite help the jabs that come out when you’re feeling uneasy. 

And Hangman does nothing, if not make you very, very uneasy. Especially like this, with his blonde hair soft and flopping all over his forehead, that old t-shirt clearly having been shrunk in the wash over the years straining across his chest, riding up a little high above his sweatpants. 

The gears are clearly turning in his head, no doubt forming something witty to gain back the slight upper hand you’ve gained in this verbal sparring. 

You should be preparing yourself for whatever he’s about to say that’s sure to make you lose your footing. But he looks like a goddamn sleepwear model like this, mellow and soft and cuddly, eyes drooping a little from tiredness and the whiskey he was sipping on all night, clothes begging to have someone’s hands fisted in them and…okay. Stopping that train of thought right the fuck now.

Nothing but danger lies down that road with a girl like you and a guy like Hangman.

You’re contemplating if you could get away with taking a cold shower when he finally looks around your room, its distinct lack of two beds apparently killing whatever comeback he had on the tip of his tongue. 

“I can sleep on the floor.” He’s rubbing the back of his neck again and his uncharacteristic awkwardness is starting to make your skin itch. 

Message received, Hangman. We both know I’m not your type.

You’ve seen the girls he usually goes home with. Even if every single one of them wasn’t annoyingly beautiful, you already know where you stand with him. For all intents and purposes, you’re just another one of the guys. Sure, you don’t take a different conquest home every other night like the rest of them, but you banter and compete with them like buddies. 

And since you and Hangman are just buddies, you roll your eyes for appearances. “Just get in the bed, Seresin. It’s huge, I’m not going to make you sleep on the floor.”

He shrugs, like he’s giving himself credit for his half-assed offer and goes to pull his sweatpants off. You give him a withering look of disbelief, studiously avoiding looking at the way his boxers stretch over his muscular thighs. 

“It’s one hundred degrees in this room,” Hangman defends himself. “I can’t sleep in pants, I’ll die.”

You pinch the bridge of your nose, considering just sleeping in the hallway yourself and ending this torture. “Is your penchant for drama genetic? Are your sisters like this too?”

He just gives you a dazzling smile in response, and you spin away from him before everything inside you melts. 

Turning the thermostat down, you shoot an evident you’re welcome stare in his direction, but his sweatpants remain in their place on the floor. He’s laid out on the bed, all tanned skin and muscle, arms crossed behind his head in a way that’s surely meant to draw your attention straight to his biceps. 

Deep breath, you tell yourself. You can do this, just lay down on the other side and don’t be weird. 

You get in and pull the covers tight, hoping the shiver that runs through you as the air conditioning kicks on isn’t noticeable. 

“And I’m dramatic,” Jake huffs, getting under the blanket and rolling closer to you. You tense, merely out of reflex and a frown creases his eyebrows almost imperceptibly before he gets comfortable on his side, pulls you into his arms. “Relax, sugar. Just trying to keep you warm, since you’re always so cold. Been told I’m like a furnace.”

By who?  You want to snap at him, but instead you swallow the words and lean into his chest. He really is warm. 

“Would never do anything you don’t want me to,” he mumbles, but there’s a trace of a chuckle in his voice that feels like he’s making fun of you.

Mocking aside, that's definitely true.

You'd never expect him to do any of the things you want him to, either. There's a reason your apprehension stems from you crossing some sort of invisible line with him in your bed and not vice versa.

"I know," you whisper, not trusting yourself to say much else without divulging all the thoughts about him you've buried deep under your comforter at home.

“How come you didn’t ask anyone else to come up and keep you warm?” Jake teases, after a few moments of silence where you were busy focusing on the whirr of the air conditioner and trying to ignore your pounding heart. 

You squint, still kind of wondering if he can feel your pulse racing. 

“The curly haired guy, from the wedding,” he supplies helpfully to answer your confused expression.

Oh. You’re surprised Jake noticed you talking to him at all. “It’s not like I wanted to sleep with him. We were just chatting.” 

“Well, he definitely wanted to.” You’d love to imagine there’s a hint of bitterness in his tone, but you know that’s just wishful thinking.

“That’s not really my thing,” you say quietly, as if he doesn’t already know. He knew enough to know you wouldn’t have anyone up here with you, after all.

It’s so much easier, laying here in the dark, not having to meet his beautiful green eyes, to be honest. All your jabs having melted into smooth, silky edges at the warmth of his body.

There’s a playful lilt to Jake’s voice again. “Sex?”

You smack him lightly on the chest. “One-night stands. I can never get comfortable enough with a stranger to have a good time, things are just better for me when it’s more involved.”

When there’s feelings, you don’t say, because you’re pretty sure he can put two and two together without you having to spell it out.

You still kind of wish you hadn’t said anything, are kicking yourself for admitting that out loud when he cuts through the anxiety of your internal monologue.

“Nothing wrong with knowing what you want, darlin’.”

“It sucks sometimes,” you admit. “It can be a little lonely.”

“Better than being with the wrong person if it’s just going to make you feel bad.”

Part of you wants to roll your eyes and scoff at him, as if Casanova Jake Seresin has any idea what that feels like, but he’s rubbing small, comforting circles in between your shoulder blades and it’s short-circuiting your brain. You find yourself running your fingers up his spine instead, playing with the soft threads of his t-shirt like you’ve wanted to since the moment you saw him at your door tonight.

“Feels nice,” he comments, pulling you in closer.

Spurred on by his praise you keep going, wandering down his back to where his shirt rides up. You look down and see that little strip of blonde hair that disappears into the waistband of his boxers, slung low enough that you can see that stupid Adonis belt on his abs. Your hand moves to the front of him of its own accord, tracing the ridges there, brushing dangerously close to the strip of elastic at the top.

Jake’s arm pops up so he can support his head with his hand, looking down at you imploringly. “What’re you playing at, sugar?”

You take your hand back like it’s been burned, cheeks suddenly hot as you realize you’d gotten carried away. “I’m sorry, I just—I didn’t think about what I was doing. Got distracted.”

He’s definitely smirking, you can practically feel it in the air above you, but you’re sure as hell not going to look up and see that self-important grin for yourself.

He pulls your fingers back to his stomach, and you can’t help but immediately brush them over his happy trail. The dusting of blonde hair surprises you a little, having expected Hangman to be too vain to leave any hair around that might distract from his physique.

You’re silently wondering if he has any hair on his chest when he catches a finger under your chin, forcing you to look up at him. You see his green eyes darkened, studying your face for something. You’re not entirely sure what.

Apparently finding what they’re looking for his expression softens, the hand supporting his head going to brush hair away from your face and you break eye contact, feeling small under his undivided attention. His fingers hover for a second, like he wants to do something more, but go to rest on your pillow instead.

“Thought that I had you pegged wrong all along for a second there, using lines to get in my pants. That’s not really my thing,” he mimics, smile twitching at the edges of his lips.

“Oh, I’m—Jake, I’m not—” you stutter, certain you must be bright red now. Your fingers are playing with the hem of his t-shirt, nervous and fidgety energy working to get released.

I’m not like this, you want to say. I’m not like you.

He exhales audibly, looking down at you, at the cherry blooming on your cheeks, at where your dainty fingers pluck at his shirt. His hand clenches once in the pillow above your head, knuckles practically white, before releasing.

“I know, sweets, was only joking. Fuck, I get that you’re a good girl,” he breathes, strained like he’s barely holding it together. “S’why I always want to ruin you.”

What.

Everything inside your mind shuts off.

All you can hear is the humming of the air conditioner, the slow intake of air into his lungs. Something inside you clenches.

You’re fairly certain a sound that closely resembles a whimper breaks from your throat, but you can’t know for sure, since all thoughts have been erased from your brain.

You hear him suck in a sharp breath, breathing in and out evenly for a couple seconds, regaining control, before he speaks again. “Sorry, sweetheart. Shouldn’t have said that. I won’t, told you I’d never do anything you don’t want.”

You already know that. That’s not the problem. The problem is how many nights you’ve already spent wishing his fingers were on you instead of your own. How many nights you've spent biting back his name, too embarrassed to let your lips form the syllables of someone who you were certain didn’t want you.

Now, though, those walls of certainty seem to be crumbling at every edge. 

“What if I want you to?” You ask quietly, barely above a whisper. It almost gets stuck in your throat, but you force your lips to form those words and let them leave your lungs.

Jake’s entire body goes tense.

But then he rolls over, putting you on your back and caging you in with his arms.

“You mean that?” He’s looking at you intensely, so intensely you might be frightened if you weren’t distracted by the weight of him on top of you, by every single scorching point of contact between you. 

All you can manage is a nod, eyes starting to glaze over as he fills every inch of your vision.

He chuckles. “Guess that’s a yes.”

Jake ducks his head to kiss you, it’s sweet, sweeter than you ever would’ve expected from him. Sweeter than you thought it would be when you were hiding beneath the sheets in your bed, with your fingers on your clit, choking back his name. 

But then he slides his tongue past your lips, deepening the kiss as he tangles a hand in your hair, tugging hard enough to make you moan straight into his mouth. His lips move down to ghost over your neck, across your jaw. 

And suddenly his words are hot in your ear. “What do you want, sweetheart? Want me to ruin you? Tell you about all the times I’ve thought about taking you apart?”

Your thighs clench together, heat blooming in your stomach and you notice, all at once, how wet you really are, slick pooling between your thighs under the wispy material of your sleep shorts. 

You open your mouth to say yes, desperately trying to find your voice, to find your familiar jabs so you can go toe to toe with him like normal, but all that comes out is a squeak. 

His hand stops at your neck, just briefly, thumb rubbing on your pulse point. And it turns every last bit of you in you to sweet, sticky, melting caramel. Your breath hitches, you suck your bottom lip between your teeth, holding back a whimper.

He’s not even doing anything, not really, but your mind immediately latches onto what he could be.

Jake’s eyes go wide for just a second before something wicked glints in the thin ring of green left.

“Thought you were so fucking innocent,” he grunts, running his thumb from your pulse point to your jaw and back again. You bring your hands to his, pulling him closer, silently asking him to press down.

You open your mouth to respond, but you don’t know how to explain. You may not do this kind of thing a lot, but you know what you like. Your imagination has certainly run wild enough times.

But any words that might’ve been readying themselves to leave your lips wither into nothing the moment he squeezes your neck.

“Jake,” you gasp, words breathy underneath the fingers around your throat. “Jake, I…”

“Hmm, what’s that, sweetheart?” His hand relents a little so you can answer, but you immediately wish he’d tighten his hold again.

“Yes, Jake,” you whine. “I want you to ruin me.”

And you don’t know what’s come over you, if you were even an ounce more present in your own body you’d probably be embarrassed.

But Jake’s head drops next to his hand at the crook of your neck, and he makes a strangled noise, the moan reverberating through your skin. 

“Jesus,” he mutters against you. “Trying to kill me, sugar?”

You don’t have an answer for that because you’re not trying to do anything, you just want more.

Your fingers are still grasping his hand, the one still around your neck, tightly, like you’re scared he’ll pull it away, leave you to drift without his grip to ground you, to remind you this moment is real. It’s actually happening. 

He lifts his head up to latch his mouth onto yours again and it’s heavier, so much more desperate than before. You whine into him as he slides his hands down your body, pushing up your shirt and you want to laugh at the absurdity of it, that you’re more turned on than you’ve ever been in your entire life and you’re both still fully clothed. 

He peels your shirt up and over your head, letting out another obscene groan at the sight of your bare chest. 

“Fucking perfect,” he murmurs. 

You fist your hands in his shirt in answer, tugging upwards, figuring fair is fair. You’re trying hard not to blush, not to show how his approval makes you light and fuzzy. He grins and sits back on his knees, pulling his shirt up and over his head, ruffling his floppy hair in the process. 

Lips parting unconsciously, your tongue flicks out to wet them. You knew he was built, but it’s overwhelming, really, to have all that tan skin on display just inches from your face. You get to run your hands up the length of his entire chest now though, leaning up so your fingers can dance through the tuft of blonde hair near the top.

Jake pushes you down on your back, firm, into the pillows. Smiling deviously when you pout and immediately clench your fingers in the sheets beside you, when your thighs press together, seeking some sort of relief to the ache between them. The seam of your shorts presses just right against your center, and you let your head fall back with a soft moan. 

Something akin to dangerous flashes in Jake’s eyes, as he hooks his fingers in your shorts, pulling down in one swift motion and tossing them off the bed before you can gain any more pleasure from the thin material. He pushes your legs apart and groans at the sight of you, glistening wet for him. “God, sweetheart, look at you.”

Just when you think you might die if he doesn’t put his hands on you, if he doesn’t touch you, if he just keeps looking at you like that, like he wants to devour you; he swipes a finger up your slit, tip pressing lightly, teasingly against your bundle of nerves. It’s too much, but not enough all at the same time. He slides a finger in, curling it exactly right on the first try and you can’t help but keen, throwing your head back into the pillows.  

He sucks in a sharp breath at your reaction, eyelids going heavy as he presses rough figure eights on your clit. “Want to get my mouth on you, get my tongue inside that gorgeous pussy, but I can’t wait, darlin’, been thinking about this for too long.” 

Warmth blooms in your chest at the realization he might’ve imagined this even half as much as you have. You’re sure you’re smiling like an idiot. 

Reaching down to the pocket of his sweatpants, he pulls a condom out of his wallet, and you want to tease him, presumptuous much? But any semblance of thought goes out the window when he pulls his boxers down, hard cock slapping against his stomach. Your mouth is suddenly, immediately sandpaper dry. 

Fuck.

Of course he’s huge. No one with an ego as colossal as his doesn’t have a reason, or several to back it up.

You don’t even hear yourself saying it out loud, don’t even realize the curses forming on your tongue, until he grins, eyebrow raised, chest puffed out in pride. “Think you can handle me, sweetheart?”

It takes you a few moments to answer, to figure out that you should answer, since you’re transfixed on him, on the strong fingers rolling the condom onto his length. If you had any sense of self-preservation at all you might be genuinely worried about his question, about not being able to walk tomorrow. 

Hopefully you don’t sound as winded as you feel when you tell him to shut the fuck up. 

Before you can bother with any stupid survival instincts, you’re pulling him down on top of you, wrapping your legs around his waist, savoring the grunt it draws from him as his tip reaches your folds.

“Love it when you’re mouthy, darlin’, nice little challenge for me,” he promises, before pushing himself inside of you. 

He goes slow, tortuously slow, and you screw your eyes shut tight as your walls flutter trying to adjust to him. You don’t notice you’re on the verge of a sob until he brushes your hair back from your sweaty forehead. “Just a little more, sweetheart, you can take it.”

The stretch of him seems to go on forever, just on this side of agonizing, but way too good for you to care about the pain, too good to be real and you can barely focus on anything else. Can barely hear Jake’s molten honey voice repeating a slew of continuous praises in your ear, can barely register the weight of his body covering every inch of you. 

Any moment now you’ll wake up in your bed at home, covered in sweat, grinding into your bed, achingly alone. You’re almost certain of it.  

But then you feel his lips on yours again, hand holding your cheek, gentle, affectionate as he bottoms out. When he finally moves, the heavy, slick pull of him in and out of you reminds you that you’re here. 

You don’t even recognize yourself, mewling, long string of unintelligible noises tumbling from your lips. 

Jake practically preens. “Where’d my feisty little brat go? That all it takes to shut you up, sugar?”

You can only hope those were rhetorical questions because he’s hiking your legs over his shoulders, picking up the pace, new angle hitting that spot deep inside you again and again, and you can’t form a single thought, let alone words. 

Jake’s fingers find your center again and press against your clit in heavy, decisive circles, winding that coil in you tighter and tighter. 

“So close,” you whimper, fingers tearing at the bedsheets.

He smirks. 

“Did I say you could come, sweetheart?”

Your jaw drops in surprise, eyes rolling back and ears ringing, mind engulfed in the heat burning in your belly. 

He’s still grinning smugly as one of those large hands comes back to your neck. 

You whine, high-pitched and breathless, eyes fluttering closed, gripping the hand around your neck as he applies pressure, desperate for something to hold onto, and you think you’re trying to form words, some of them may even be making it out of your mouth, something along the lines of please please please, let me come, Jake, I can’t, JakeJakeJakeJake…

“So pretty all fucked out like this, stretched around my cock.” His gaze is fixed on where he’s plunging in and out of you, tone almost reverent. “It’s okay, sweetheart, come for me, wanna feel you, want…”

You don’t hear the rest because you’re focused on where his fingers dig into the sides of your neck, tipping over the edge, string of lights inside of you tangled and blowing a fuse. Everything bursts all at once and you’re clutching Jake’s arms so hard you’re positive you’re leaving marks, but it doesn’t matter, you don’t care because you’re in a free fall, toes curling in bliss. 

When you come to, you’re just barely aware of his pace growing erratic, hand on your throat loosening as it goes to brush your sweaty hair back from your forehead. His thrusts are getting shallower, mouth spewing a litany of jumbled praises so tight, so wet, so perfect baby, when suddenly he’s arching over you, hands tight on your hips as he empties into the condom. 

You’re not sure you’re still functioning. You’re not sure you’ll ever move again. You’re pretty sure you’ll ever have a coherent thought again.

Distantly you can hear his heavy breathing, feel his weight on top of you but you don’t fully register it. 

“Sweetheart?” He asks when you’ve been silent for minutes, or maybe hours, who knows. 

You look up at him, blinking slowly, eyelids made of lead, vision unfocused.

Jake grins, and it's almost boyish. It's annoyingly cute. “That good?” 

That cuts through the haze enough that you kind of want to slap him, for the arrogance littering those three little words. Or yourself, for helping his ego grow any bigger. 

As it stands, you’re too dazed to actually do either. You nod, silently burrowing your face into his neck. He chuckles again, and you decide maybe you don’t hate that teasing sound that much, maybe you’ll spend your days trying to elicit it from him as often as possible. You’re still thinking about it when he peels himself off you to clean you both up. 

When he settles back down, he pulls you in tight, curls around you in a way that should be uncomfortable, like he’d crawl inside your skin if he could. 

+

Jake is still glued to you when you wake up in the morning, and your heart clenches too affectionately to be irritated by the fact that you can’t really move. Or breathe. 

But you take one look at the smirk on his face, the mischievous glimmer that seems to linger even in his sleep and the butterflies in your stomach turn to stone.

You don’t think he’s that much of an asshole, you’re pretty sure the bravado is all a front. That he wouldn’t do something like this, knowing how you operate, without any intention of moving forward, but the anxiety still thrums incessantly beneath your ribcage.

You’re lost inside your own head, fighting the panic rising in your chest when he yawns, rubbing his eyes before tucking himself back into your side, impossibly closer.  

“Guess that fifty bucks I gave Phoenix to find somewhere else to stay was a steal,” he mumbles, fingers dancing across your bare skin. 

It’s his turn to pat himself on the back as your mouth drops open in shock. 

Jake grins, eyes sparkling as he presses a kiss into your hair. “Good luck getting rid of me now.”

[vinelark]

in return for the fic recs i got last month, here are a few fics i read recently that i want to absolutely yell about from the rooftops:

Iron, Fire, Mirror-Glass by PurpleSoot: an early batman days AU where, while slowly healing from a spine-shattering injury, bruce finds an old book about the fae. in a fit of desperation he attempts a Summoning to try to heal his spine. enter: robin.

this story is fantastic—the kind of longfic with a plot so good and satisfying that finishing it leaves you on a reading high for at least a week. one of the best early days bruce fics i’ve ever read, with honorable mentions to excellent alfred and clark and jim and selina characterizations—but robin (dick) really takes the cake here. the balance of chilling, otherworldly, not-quite-human vs. playful, earnest, Still Just a Child…chef’s kiss. the way robin’s character arc drags bruce kicking and screaming through his own emotional growth is so well-paced and well-wrought that i already want to reread just so i can experience it again. this is one of those god-tier longfics that i can’t believe i got to read for free on the internet.

mid-reading testimonial:

The Lone Ranger Never Had to Deal with Bruce Wayne by @theskeptileptic: a tim-joins-the-family-early fic in which tim decides to do everyone (his parents) a solid by faking his own death and running away to canada, except his weirdo neighbor bruce wayne keeps butting in and messing up his plans.

this is one of the rare stories where tim doesn’t know batman’s identity yet, and even rarer stories where that somehow makes the whole thing even more compelling. this fic has two of my favorite things: small, lonely, moderately unhinged tim drake pov, and really good pangs—pangs that are expertly teased out through flashbacks that add context to the present action at exactly the right moments. also, a very fun cameo near the end. i had a blast reading this one, physically clutched my chest more than once, and am already looking forward to rereading.

mid-reading testimonial (feat. @cairoscene):

equivalent exchange by scribblemetimbers (wip): an au set during tim’s robin days in which tim discovers 1) crossroads demons are a thing and 2) people can make deals with them. deals that include bringing people back from the dead, so long as you’re willing to pay the price with your own life.

this fic is so…🤌‼️ it feels like everything i want in a fic so far, down to two incredibly specific concepts i love (bruce, in his grief, saying something harsh to robin!tim with disastrous consequences later + tim making a big secret sacrifice gambit) which are both done so so well, within a larger plot that is also done so so well. the way this fic cuts in and out of scenes at the exact right moments for max tension feels like a masterclass in causing me to tear my hair out (in the best way), and instead of assorted pangs reading it is just one big Pang. it currently leaves off on an agonizing cliffhanger but, again, in the best way. highly recommend. (thank you again @owlbats for the rec!)

exchange between me and my friend after i sent the link, which about sums it up:

and to cut this angst with some humor:

IRIS Log #1548 by @deadchannelradio: a night on patrol as recorded by the bats’ audio logs, centering around red hood getting flung into a ditch and everyone, eventually, getting home safe.

one of the top ten funniest things i’ve ever read—spiritually up there with send to all (and if you’ve seen my fic rec tag you’ll know what a compliment that is). this makes use of the audio log format SO well. the dialogue shines, the jokes land with excellent timing, and it moves at such a clip that it’s pretty much impossible to stop reading once you’ve started. every character shines in this, and i’ve randomly choked on laughter remembering the phrase ‘good god he got thrown like a corn hole beanbag’ like twenty times in the past few weeks.

mid-reading testimonial:

[edandstede]

racist fucks out here acting like ed is doomed to become abusive like his father, like he is a violent monster, as if his arc isn’t about learning that he isn’t a monster at all but just a man. how are you looking at ed accepting himself, overcoming feeling like he’s the literal kraken, that he’s loveable and worthy of compassion and kindness even when he thinks the worst of himself, and drawing the conclusion that he’s an irredeemable thug - which is, by the way, what every fucking villain and antagonist thinks of him. you’re aligning your view of him with the bad guys, y’know, the ones who call him a donkey, low-born, and try goading him into violence over and over again because they think that’s all he’s worth? and yeah that includes izzy, because he did that too, it’s 90% of what he fucking did, treating him like he only deserved to live if he was performing hyper masculinity the entire time and the second he stopped he was worse than dead.

we are supposed to feel sorry for ed. the way he feels is heartbreaking. he was abandoned, had his worst fears confirmed to him by stede leaving and izzy pressing on the wound in the worst possible way, and then he fell completely into depression and suicidal ideation. he thinks it’s all he’s good for. he can’t be loved, he hates himself, he’s just the dick who killed his dad and nobody wants him for him. how can you see this very obvious spelled-out agony in him and say “hey, that guy is gonna abuse the man he loves, he’s an abuser just like his dad” you guys are just absolute bottom of the barrel scumbag dickheads, you really really are. you could not be more blatantly racist. you know damn well the show is not saying what you’re claiming it is.

also, insisting that he would ever hurt stede is just completely ignoring every single fucking thing about him. ed would never. the only fucking time stede is physically hurt by ed is when he wakes up from literal death and headbutts him. that’s it. i think we can all agree he didn’t even know what planet he was on when that occurred, and he petulantly says “good it was supposed to hurt” during a squabble that ends with stede telling ed he loves everything about him. pull the other one if you think this was ever framed as ed seriously wanting to hurt stede and not an incredibly hurt and vulnerable man still acting on a half-dead brain.

like for fuck’s sake this is the same man who hides under stede’s robe and presses his head to stede’s hand when he cries after telling him - the only person he has EVER TOLD - about killing his dad. he tells stede about the plot to kill him, and he cannot do it. he can’t lift a finger to him, he never would. he holds stede’s face with both hands when he kisses him and tells him he loves him. he brings him breakfast with a bit of twine on ‘cause he panicked and thought it needed a flourish. he rubs stede’s cashmere against his cheek. the first thing he says makes his life worth living is warmth. he imagines stede with a big goofy sweet grin and gold sparkly goldfish tail coming to save his life. he just wants to retire and have his inn with the man he loves and not worry about stede ever being in a near-death situation again. he wants stede to be safe with him. at no point are we remotely told in the text that we should be genuinely worried ed will ever, ever physically hurt stede. he protects this man with his WHOLE BODY twice and signs an act of grace to avoid him being shot. he tries to get ned to leave him alone when they’re being tortured. he jumps off the boat with jack to swim back to him and he rows back to the republic to find stede too.

he loves stede, would never hurt him, and you’re all just fucking sour your fav died and you’re saying any old shite as a result. swear to god if i catch one more of you even so much as insinuating ed is abusive i’m gonna start lobbing off toes as well.

[makoodles]

I asked for the last magic rabbit fic, so I’ve gotta do it again: what’s happening for ghost during all this? Here he is, leaving to go run (partially out of habit but also so he doesn’t end up fucking you again when you’re so sore after your first time) and he’s trying to be normal and not obsess over you, or fuck you again when you aren’t ready or push any boundaries but then you disappear? And then flirt with some wanker at the bar when he fucked you brainless not even a week before? Only to find out that you thought you were being rejected by him over and over this week :(((( his heart maybe cold but it damn near broke at that. Ya hash it out, and then he finally has your cunt back in his life, and it’s so wet and he knows she missed him, but before he dive in fully (and make you soak his mask so he walks around all week with the smell of you stuck to him) you want to try something??? Oh fuck you’ve been practicing sucking dick on your toys?? Fuck he’s gonna come from the mental image of that. And then yoh suck him off, and you don’t think it’s very good (and maybe it’s not) but it’s you so it’s the best damn head he’s ever gotten and then you say you want him to come on your face??? He almost did with just those words. He has to promise both of you that he’ll do it next time, otherwise he’d never forgive himself. And then he finally gets to dive into the sweetest cunt in the world and it feels like coming home, he’d gladly live off just your cum if he could. Has to really stop himself from bringing you over the edge at least two more times with just his mouth. And then he finally slides into her and it’s perfect and he’s never letting you avoid him ever again. And then you moan his name???? He can’t control himself in these conditions. You wanna be on top???? He went brain dead for a second. And then when you got him all in, he’s gone feral with possessive thoughts, needing you to know you belong with him. “Am I doing good?” Are you trying to kill him via his dick??? And when all is said and done you ask if y’all are dating now??? As if Ghost hasn’t already decided that you (and your pussy) are it for him???

BABE YOU GET ITTTT!!!

i'm a firm believer that simon riley is an absolute disaster of a man, you'd just never know it because he hides it all behind that mask and quiet arrogance.

besides, like he told you already, he's not good with virgins. he meant that in a very literal sense - it's not that he's not good with them sexually (he's already proven that he is in fact good in that sense), but he is hopeless when it comes to communicating with you. he was hoping that you would be better with it, but you have no experience either so of course it's going to lead to confusion!

but yes absolutely, most of this fic from simon's pov would just be excited mental screaming. you just know that his ego is SWELLING despite the way he is constantly near a heart attack with every word you say and moan you make

[imfinereallyy]

Am I a Taylor swift girlie? No. Cannot I not resist the swiftification of steddie because of this post? Also yes. This is for all the swifties and @harringtonisms who inspired this post.

“You know, there was a brief moment where I thought about proposing to Nancy.”

Eddie almost chokes on his beer, and Steve has to lean over to pat his back. Steve can’t help but feel a little bad for startling him.

“Excuse me, what?” Eddie turns his head to Steve, finally calmed down. Steve thinks the pool lights reflecting off his pale skin makes him look even prettier than usual. It feels unfair.

“Sorry, we’re talking about life and stuff, and it felt natural to bring it up!” Steve shrugs his shoulders, regretting saying anything in the first place.

“I was talking about how we should all move to Indy, and you thought to bring up how you almost proposed to your high school girlfriend at, what? 16?”

“17.”

“Jesus Christ.” Eddie wiped a hand down his face. “The longer we are friends, the more deeply unsettling things I learn about you. Just when I think there can’t be more, boom! You hit me with another thing, Stevie.”

Steve feels himself get prickly, “Hey man, no need to be a dick.”

Eddie’s face softens, “Sorry. Sorry. Took me by surprise. I am a little curious, though. If you’re…still willing to share.”

Steve takes in Eddie for a moment, debating whether to explain. He knows he can trust Eddie. He trusts him with his life, and, more importantly, the kids' lives, and he knows most of Steve’s secrets. And Steve looks at Eddie, like really looks at him, and knows that even though he will make fun of him, he won’t judge him.

Steve is starting to learn the difference.

“The summer between my junior and senior year, things with me and Nance started to turn sour. Right after the first round of the Upside Down, we broke up for like two weeks. I hadn’t known at the time, but I think it was because she was waiting for Jonathan to make a move.”

“Shit dude, that sucks.”

“It’s fine. Stupid high school love triangle. Felt like the end of the world at the time. The irony is not lost on me.” Steve pats around his pockets for his cigarettes. The one secret Eddie is privy to that Robin is not. He only does it when he is stressed or drinking, and now he is exposed to both.

Steve puts one in his mouth and lights up; he motions the pack to Eddie in offering. “Thanks, man.” Eddie takes the cigarette and leans into Steve, the motion familiar, almost routine. Like Eddie knows he shouldn’t bother to ask for the light, that Steve will do it for him.

Steve flicks the lighter open while Eddie cups his hands. Steve doesn’t move away when Eddie blows smoke in his face. Steve will take it. He wants desperately to take it directly from his lips, exhale the taste of menthol and Eddie’s tongue, but he can’t. So he’ll take this.

“So summer it turned sour?”

Steve clears his throat, leans back a little but doesn’t move away completely. He rests his elbows on his knees. “We got back together after those two weeks, and suddenly it was like Nancy was clinging to me. Well, in the most Nancy way possible, which isn’t much, but for her, it was a lot. It was like she needed to prove to herself she was making the right decisions. When summer came around, though, I think everything settled in for her. The Upside Down, Barb being dead, me being unfit for her.”

Steve takes a drag, “She started criticizing me a lot. Saying I wasn’t committed, telling me I’m unfocused. That I didn’t understand. That I was pushing things aside. It was a bit unfair of her, considering she didn’t really want to talk about things; she didn’t want to explain, she just wanted to do what she wanted. I mean, I can’t really blame her—her best friend died, and it was my fault—“

“Sweetheart,” Eddie tries to cut him off,

“Never mind, off-topic.” Steve waves his cigarette hand in the air. “Anyway, in the summer, I took that as she saw me not committed to her. That I wasn’t focused enough on her, and her wants. Which, in retrospect, probably was naive of me, but I was 17 and madly in love with her. So I thought about proposing. The thought maybe lasted a week, right before school started. I thought, ‘This will show her I care. That I am in this.’ It didn’t seem that crazy to me at the time. I mean my parents got married at 18, had me at 22. It wasn’t exactly out of the normal. I even bought a ring—“

Steve laughs manically for a moment, while Eddie stays silent.

“—which was insane of me. It wasn’t a nice ring, either. I had to use the money I saved from lifeguarding. Which wasn’t much, so it was a dainty little Diamond on a small band that I found in a pawnshop in Bloomington. But like I said, the idea only lasted about a week. Once school started, Nancy got really distant. And my parents came home, and I was reminded about why you shouldn’t get married at 18. So I just let the thought go, kind of. But I held on to the ring, because I think part of me still held on to the idea. And then the ‘bullshit’ incident happened, and well, you know the rest.”

“Jesus, Steve. I’m sorry.” Eddie’s cigarette is almost down to the filter, the ash building up at the end. He barely hit it the entire story.

“Not your fault, Eds. I think she was kind of, right anyway. We weren’t right for each other, and I was more worried about being normal, and moving on that I didn’t let her move on the way she needed. I wasn’t the best, even now. I get it. I…”

“What?” Eddie moves closer, their knees brushing against each other. Steve can’t look him in the eye. “What, Stevie?”

“I wouldn’t marry me either.”

Eddie takes in a sharp breath. The sound cuts through Steve so suddenly he wipes he head up to face Eddie.

When Steve’s eyes meet Eddie’s, he isn’t expecting the tears. He isn’t expecting the softness. He certainly isn’t expecting Eddie to cup Steve’s face with a tenderness he hasn’t known since he was a child. “You don’t really think that do you?”

Steve’s frustrated voice turns into a soft whisper. “Of course I do. Eddie, I wouldn’t want to stick around someone like me. I’m broken beyond repair, and the only thing I would have going for me is money, and it isn’t even mine. Like I said, the ring I bought isn’t even nice.”

“Show me it, trust me, if it’s anything like you, I bet it’s beautiful.”

Steve chokes back a sob, “I pawned it back, actually. Months ago, for Robin’s birthday. I bought her that chunky turquoise ring she wears on her pointer instead.”

Eddie laughs, a small wet one. Steve knows he’s thinking about how often Robin accidentally smacks people in the face with it, but adamantly refuses to take it off. “Good, Buckley deserves pretty things.”

“That’s why I keep telling her to take a shot at Nancy.”

Eddie gives a big laugh this time, his hands still clinging to Steve’s face. The laugh sends vibrations through Steve, making him feel warm and safe.

“That’ll happen, I guarantee it, but it will take ten years. Going to be some rom-com kind of story for them to get it together.” Eddie brushes the hair from Steve’s face. A thumb caresses his cheek. “Steve, I don’t think I’m the best person to unpack all of that. Truly I am a disaster of a human being when it comes to love. But I do know that anyone, and I mean anyone, would be lucky to have you. Nance didn’t see it—or maybe she did and knew she wasn’t right for you. I don’t know. But someday, someone will not just want to marry you, but need to. They are going to want to keep you forever and do their best to accomplish that.”

“I don’t have much, Eddie. I’m just an empty shell, with an empty wallet, going nowhere. Who would choose me?”

Eddie leans back, taking his hands away from Steve’s face. He doesn’t move very far, but he looks up at the sky and whispers, “Oh, Steve. You just don’t see how amazing you are. You don’t need anything for someone to want you.”

Steve doesn’t want to break whatever moment Eddie is having, so all he can manage is a simple, “Yea?”

Eddie looks back at Steve, really looks at him, and says,

“I’d marry you with paper rings.”

Steve breaks a little. In a good way, in a needed way. Like he is breaking himself open to see what’s inside. And inside is this unwavering love for a man who he calls one of his best friends. Steve isn’t sure what to say, really. Eddie’s unwavering stare says he understands. That he doesn’t have to say anything at all.

Steve grabs his empty beer bottle and peels off the label, and starts to roll it and twist it into a tiny circle. He grabs Eddie’s hand and puts the makeshift ring on his finger.

Steve brings their conjoined hands to his mouth and kisses the back of Eddie’s. “Me too.”

***

Sue me, the 10 minute version of All to Well is a masterpiece and it would be silly to not admit it.

also this is unedited…like I wrote this and ran. Thinking about doing another version with the quotes reverse because I have an idea.

[babygirllinds]

if you haven't already, you should do some spicy icemav hcs.

love your stuff!

I’d be honored to drop some HCs 🫡 I think I’ve only ever done HCs for Slimav so I’m happy to provide… and spicy? all the better 👀 also thank you so much for sending this!!!!

warning: smut ahead 👀 I definitely went overboard, but I hope you guys enjoy 🫠

The first time Ice and Maverick have sex is after the Layton mission.

Ice fell first that day in the bar. It was meant to be an intimidation tactic, but he got close enough to look into Maverick’s eyes and to smell his cologne and it was all over for him. Maverick was dangerous, but probably more so on the ground than in the sky. Maverick had feelings but didn’t acknowledge them because Ice was a dick, okay? It wasn’t until the mission and they claimed each other as wingmen that Maverick really let himself think about the possibility. Spoiler: Maverick fell harder

I think the adrenaline of the mission finally pulled them together. Especially after finding themselves alone together. Maverick kisses him first and immediately apologizes before Ice is pulling him back in and deepening it

They both jerk each other off in a frenzy with Ice’s other hand over Maverick’s mouth to muffle his moans. He’s bites Maverick’s shoulder hard enough to draw blood when he cums and Maverick nearly blacks out when Ice ghosts a finger over his hole

Ice and Maverick are absolutely gone for each other, as everyone can agree. There’s not a place that they haven’t had sex. Including a public place. They just really can’t keep their hands to themselves.

The car? Definitely fogged up some windows in their youth

Locker room? Ice definitely pushed Maverick to his knees just to watch as the water poured over him with his mouth full

Ice’s office? Let’s just say that his assistant knows when to tell people firmly that her boss is busy and not to bother him (Maverick brings her flowers in apology each time he visits)

Penny has 100% chased them out of the hard deck bathroom at some point and she definitely doesn’t let Mav live it down

Maverick is a brat through and through. The first time Ice let himself think of him in a sexual way, he imagined getting him to shut up with a firm hand in his hair and his mouth full of Ice’s cock

Mav knows he’s a brat too and he knows it gets Ice going to take charge. The man aimed to be admiral since the beginning of his career so taking charge of Mav is like practice in a way

Mav will do something that has everyone exasperated and Ice will gladly take him home and spank his ass raw

Ice also worries about him doing something potentially dangerous and winding up dead and most of his anger is how scared he is to lose Mav so no matter how harsh the punishment is, Ice is always pulling him into his arms and kissing his tears away and telling him how much he loves him

Leading into this one, they 100% have a dom/sun type of relationship in my eyes. Maverick craves attention and that’s why he acts out. Ice craves to be in charge and to take care of someone.

They don’t let the dynamic rule their lives, but Ice is always there to be a guiding and firm hand in Maverick’s life. He always is looking out for him and making sure he stays on the right path

Ice will sometimes lay out a scene especially when he knows Maverick needs it. Let’s say Maverick’s adhd and anxiety (which that man 100% has both) has him crawling in his skin and Ice can’t take the way Maverick will let himself fester so Ice takes it into his own hands to have Maverick relax and let go and just let Ice do what he needs to do

Maverick is content to do whatever Ice asks when he’s under. Be it multiple orgasms or orgasm delay until he’s shaking and crying and Ice finally takes pity on him and fucks him

Maverick is a total pillow princess sometimes.

He likes to lay back while Ice just takes what he wants

Sometimes Ice will tie him up and just play with him for hours and Maverick is content to just lay there and let him

He’ll beg for it on days he feels horny, but too sleepy to put in the effort

Now on the other hand… Maverick also likes to actively take part in sex.

He loves the feeling of riding Ice while Ice just lays back. He won’t touch him, just lets Maverick take his fill, sometimes with hands on his hips and guiding his movements

Especially when Ice goes through chemo and is healing and too tired to keep up with him. Ice just wants him to be satisfied and is willing to let Maverick take active charge as he fucks himself on Ice’s cock

As much as Maverick loves missionary sex where he can stare into Ice’s eyes, he loves most every position. He wants to be with Ice anyway he can.

Let’s just say reverse cowgirl is his favorite. Especially when Ice is able to get a firm grip in his hair

Ice’s favorite position is the mating press… he feels the closest to Mav when he presses his legs almost to his shoulders and their chests and stomachs are touching and his face is close enough to kiss him

I’m sorry, but I need to speak my truth. Mav is a bottom except…

Except on the occasion Ice asks him to fuck him. He can’t say no to Ice and it’s not like he doesn’t like it. He loves being inside Ice. He just likes it better when Ice is inside him. Ice does too, but sometimes he just wants to feel Mav in a different way

Ice will usually take control of the situation, riding Mav until they’re both coming undone. He’ll fuck himself on Mav’s soft cock after Mav already came, chasing his own pleasure and then he’ll cum all over Mav’s stomach and chest (he rubs his cum over Mav’s treasure trail and then over his already sensitive nipples, marking him)

Also like earlier, when going through chemo, sometimes he isn’t able to get hard and he’ll encourage Mav to just fuck him. This is when they usually take it slow and Ice’s legs are over Maverick’s thighs as Mav thrusts slowly into Ice, still playing with Ice’s soft cock and kissing Ice all over his face and chest to show him how much he loves him

Let’s take about marking… because both of these bastards are jealous and possessive and we love to see it.

Ice is a biter. Let’s rewind to the locker room in Top Gun 1986. That chomp is all the proof you need

Mav comes out of their bedroom looking like he was gnawed on. There’s bites and fresh bruises over his chest, thighs, hips, ass, and shoulders. Never his throat (unless they’re on leave and there’s time for the bites to heal before Maverick goes back to work)

Ice also loves rubbing his cum into Maverick’s skin. It’s more a subtle marking because it’s not like anyone will see or know. But it settles Ice’s nerves being able to mark his lover with something so lewd

Maverick loves to dole out hickies. He’s sucking on any part of skin he can reach and often gets carried away with leaving them all over Ice’s neck and jaw. Ice has never been more thankful for his excuse to wear scarves after his throat surgery because Maverick is able to leave them without fear of either of them getting in trouble for unprofessionalism

Maverick also prides himself on the scratches and dried out scabs in shapes of crescents along Ice’s biceps or back after Ice fucked him silly enough that he just dug his nails into his skin. It thrills him when Ice will forgo his shirt while working out and someone immediately takes notice of the marks

Let’s talk about kinks…

Ice loves Mav the way he is, but he also gets such a thrill out of feminizing him. He loves calling Mav his wife or buying him lacy lingerie. Maverick also moans like a whore anytime Ice calls his ass his [tight and hot] cunt or his chest his [pretty lil’] tits

Maverick definitely has daddy issues or an authority figure kink. He grew up without his father and was consistently in his shadow. Sometimes when he’s far under, he’ll call Ice daddy and Ice goes crazy for it. He loves being seen as safe enough that Mav feels comfortable enough to say it. Mav also loves playing up the whole Lt. and Adm. thing in bed. When Ice finally became admiral, the sex is 10x hotter as Maverick clenches down around his cock and says something along the lines of, “show me who’s in charge, Admiral.”

Also let’s face it as well. Ice loves being called daddy, okay? He has daddy issues himself. His dad was a dick and constantly berated him. Ice took those feelings and put them to wanting to take care of the people he loves. He wants to be better than his father and show the people he loves he cares and he’s someone safe to lean on. So he won’t really say it, but every time Maverick utters the word ‘daddy’, Ice is ready to risk the god damn world for him

Let’s talk oral sex…

Maverick is a whore for blowjobs. He wants to blow Ice any chance he can. He likes to deep throat him and he also likes when Ice fucks his face. He loves how raw his throat feels afterwards and welcomes the sting

Ice is precise with his blowjobs. He takes his time until Maverick is shaking and begging to cum. He usually will finger Mav at the same time to bring him that little extra pleasure. He’ll make a show out of it too. He’ll suction his mouth over the tip like he’s trying to suck Maverick’s cum out of him like a straw

Ice also loves to rim Mav. Mav at first was like ??? No thanks. But then Ice took his time and licked him open with precision until Maverick cried from how good it felt. Maverick practically asks for it consistently now and Ice is happy to oblige

I probably have so much more, but my brain isn’t conjuring all of them up at the moment lmao. I hope everyone enjoys these though <3

[fandomfluffandfuck]

(I’m half asleep but the image is so clear in my head I wanted to put it down)

I’ve been thinking about Bucky taking Steve to a gay club for the first time (in my head it’s a Shrunkyclunks AU, but it can work for canon divergence too). Bucky goes all out - mesh top, leather pants, royal blue eyeliner and hair blown into tousled curls. When he meets Steve in the living room, Steve is in a slightly dressed down version of his everyday look; his eyes goggle at Bucky and he immediately questions whether he actually wants to leave the apartment at all - but he feels lacking too. He doesn’t know how to live in his skin like Bucky does.

Bucky takes care of him. Has Steve go commando under his jeans and take off his button down and undershirt and replace it with one of Bucky’s white A-frames, thin plaid shirt fluttering open on top. Already slim on Bucky, the A-frame is obscene on Steve - his pecs spill out of each side, and his nipples stretch the fabric so tightly it’a almost translucent.

Just before they head out the door Bucky stops him again. Vanishes into the bathroom and returns with some mascara and the lightest lipgloss. Cradles Steve’s face in his hands as he applies it, stands with him in front of the hall mirror as Steve takes in the sight of them - audacious and devastating and larger than life, in how they’re living in their skin.

They hold hands on the walk to the club, and when they go in they’re glued to each other the whole time. Bucky seems to know everyone, hugs men and slaps backs and always slides back into Steve’s arms almost before he can miss him. Steve can’t dance, but he doesn’t need to when Bucky presses against him from forehead to chest to rolling hips, sharing sweat and hot breaths and the feeling of their dicks straining hard under denim.

Steve fucks Bucky into the mattress when they get home. He fucks paint off the wall behind the headboard, holds Bucky down and makes him cry and smear makeup the length of their pillows.

They clean up and cuddle down. Face to face, nose to nose. Bucky’s leg slung over Steve’s hip, breath soft on his face, Steve’s fingers gentle as they trace the arch of Bucky’s cheekbone, the slopes of his lips. Kisses every place his hands brush and thanks him, thanks him, thanks him for bringing them both to life.

(Continued from last night cause I can’t stop thinking about it) In the morning they get woken up by a critical mission alert on Steve’s phone. He’s so used to it being just him, he’s stumbled into clothes and is almost out the door before Bucky says, “Wait,” and Steve remembers where he is. Steve turns with his back to the door, breathing hard, as Bucky walks over with a wet towel in his hands. He’s shirtless in loose sweatpants, two inches shorter than Steve in his bare feet, glitter still clinging to his hair and skin despite their shower last night before falling dead to the world. Steve can’t breathe for how beautiful Bucky is, and stands like he’s in a trance until Bucky stops in front of him, chests brushing. With so much gentleness, he cleans the last of the makeup off Steve’s face. “I love you Bucky,” Steve says, because it’s true, and he doesn’t know if he’s said it before. Bucky looks like he might laugh, like he might cry. He kisses one of Steve’s cheeks, then the other. When the words come, they’re deep in his chest, strangled. “I’ll say it back when you’re home.” A long moment, then he takes two long steps back and Steve slips out the door. When Steve is on the quinjet, in uniform, centering himself to put the mask of Captain America back on, he checks his phone one more time. B: Tell me if you gotta turn your phone off. B: If I’m gonna be a war wife might as well know not hearing from you doesn’t mean you’re dead or whatever. B: Lol. **text deleted** B: Be safe. B: Please. Steve closes his eyes tight, swallows the largeness and the ecstasy and the warmth of his life with Bucky way down deep where it won’t distract him. Where no one will be able to get to it. S: Going dark now. S: I love you, Buck. Three grey dots pop up instantly. B: I love you too, you fucking asshole. B: If I don’t get to say that to your face you’ll make me really fucking mad. B: I’m here when you’re done. Steve types one word: S: Received. Then he turns off his phone, and he goes to work.

I AM SO FUCKING GRATEFUL YOU WROTE THIS DOWN BUT ALSO HOW DARE YOU MAKE THIS SMUT SO SOFT AND SO ANGSTY!?

I can see Steve so viscerally in my mind, making me more than a little insane, and I can feel Steve's determination and love and fear. Just--

"Bucky takes care of him. Has Steve go commando under his jeans and take off his button down and undershirt and replace it with one of Bucky’s white A-frames, thin plaid shirt fluttering open on top. Already slim on Bucky, the A-frame is obscene on Steve - his pecs spill out of each side, and his nipples stretch the fabric so tightly it’a almost translucent. Just before they head out the door Bucky stops him again. Vanishes into the bathroom and returns with some mascara and the lightest lipgloss. Cradles Steve’s face in his hands as he applies it, stands with him in front of the hall mirror as Steve takes in the sight of them - audacious and devastating and larger than life, in how they’re living in their skin."

AND just that "received." One word with all this emotion.

Jesus Christ.

This is beautiful; it's incredible.

I love this. I love you.

Thank you for sending this to me!!

[thehauntedinfirmary]

Fic Rec Friday Edition 24

Welcome to Fic Rec Friday! We're in the mood for some longfics for this cozy December evening, so settle in and read along!

Hell for the Holidays by ma_malice Complete | 23k words

“There will be no sacrifice,” Shane said for the third time since they’d landed in Illinois. “Not so much as a chicken. Stop being weird.” Shane takes Ryan home for the holidays. It goes about as well as you’d expect.

Santa Daddies by drunkkenobi Complete | 3k words

“I really think we should just tell her,” Shane argued. “Kids find out anyway, might as well have our girl be ahead of the class.” “Shane, she’s three!” Ryan shot back. “All kids should believe in Santa at three!” Or: Ryan and Shane vs The Santa Problem

The Young and the Hopeless by mccxxvi Complete | 54k words

He lifted the towel to wipe his small mirror, when he saw it. There was writing on the mirror, a single word wiped into the condensation, written with a finger, a set of tidy, straight letters. Alexander. Ryan almost screamed. The ghost wanted Ryan to find his murderer and bring him to the light. Alexander must have been whoever murdered him. Ryan sighed, resigned to be the detective responsible for it. “Fine, I’ll find this Alexander you want. But I don’t know what to do afterwards,” he said to his empty room. A 1960s Professor!Shane/PhDstudent!Ryan gothic novel flavored AU fic, because i know a market gap when i see one.

A Ghoul's Guide to Life, Death & Afterliving by MercurySkies Complete | 70k words

'Shane was dead: to begin with. There is no doubt whatever about that, to quote ‘the’ Charles Dickens with an emphasis on the 'dick'. They didn’t tell you the great Victorian novelist was also a grade A asshole in high school but then again what do they tell you in high school? Shane Madej was dead, as dead as one disembodied soul standing seemingly above his own corpse probably can be.'

The Last Days Of The Bergara Gang by PhyllisDietrichson Complete | 41k words

“Plus,” and he smiles with all of his white teeth, “if we’d left you there much longer to cardsharp that crew, likely your night would have ended with a knife to the throat.” He reaches out as if to graze his fingers over Shane’s clavicle, then remembers himself at the last minute. His hand hovers in the air. “And what a shame it would be, to mar that throat.” “Do you—what do you want, Bergara?” Shane stammers out. He winces at the waver in his voice. “You,” he responds, his eyes sweeping up to meet him with a gaze that pierces Shane between the ribs.

hey boy, take a look at me by weakspots Complete | 18k words

Ryan is 27, for Christ’s sake, and he’s not exactly hideous, so there’s really no reason to spend his money on a dude — a dude — whose face he’ll never see but whose livestreams he’s been jerking off to for roughly 4 months now. He should be going out and partying and fucking random chicks. Or a guy, whatever, just to get it out of his system and confirm to himself that he really is 100% straight. Because he is. This is morbid curiosity, if anything.

Whatever The Opposite Of Lesbian Sheep Syndrome Is by orphan_account Complete | 9k words

Shane was the one who kissed, not the one who was kissed. Shane was the one who did the holding, not the one who was held, and that was fine.

made it so far in time by addandsubtract Complete | 12k words

“I’m, uh. I’m pretty sure the you I’m friends with is older,” Ryan says, and then winces.

use somebody by bodhirookes Complete | 10k words

“You’re the most obnoxious person I’ve ever met,” Shane says over the sound of Ryan’s workout noises, which are equal parts distracting and hideous. “Why can’t you just be a lazy asshole like the rest of us?” “I have a figure and reputation to maintain,” Ryan grits out, not even pausing to look at him. “Can’t be a big, bad ghost hunter without my guns.” Or, Shane has a thing for Ryan's muscles and Ryan has a thing for Shane having a thing.

a child's answer by deerie Complete | 2k words

“You know, it’s kind of sad about the Queen Mary,” Ryan says as they make their way to the mess hall. “That’s where I saw a ghost for the first time.” Shane stares at him incredulously. Ryan can tell that he wants to say something, but is refraining. He’ll have to find the video of the tube of toothpaste being knocked off the counter as proof to show Shane. Ryan remembers the panic he felt in that moment: the revelation that something existed outside of the realm of what he understood. It’s the same feeling that he had when the Kaiju first appeared, thrashing and tearing and ripping buildings and bridges to shreds.

A Symptom of Time by fightingfuries WIP | 12k words

"Sure," Shane says easily like he doesn't believe Ryan for a second. "You're living out the plot of the 1993 Bill Murray vehicle Groundhog Day. Now where does the kissing factor in, exactly?" "You were all like 'I'm Shane, I don't believe in magic but you should find a tall brunette to kiss.’" Shane laughs again, helplessly. "I'm the tall brunette? I obviously meant Andie McDowell." He catches himself. "If I had said that, which I didn't, because time loops aren't real."

Want to learn more about The Haunted Infirmary? Check out our pinned post!

[roxineedstosleep]

Kori doesn't mind loving a Daddy's Boy

@bruciemilf, this is for you moonpie!!!

.............................................................

Jason had relationships… not good or lasting ones, but they were relationships nonetheless.

Some lasted a few weeks or a whole summer, others lasted as long as Damian's patience when Tim ate his falafel.

But as I said. They were relationships. Full stop.

Then, when he starts to have feelings for Kori… it's relatively strange and familiar.

Jason meets Kori for a number of reasons. One of them, ironically, was that she was his older brother's ex. He learns that the two ended on good terms, and that Dick is quite fond of the girl. So there's no awkwardness on that side. He actually met Kori after a bunch of missions and quite casual encounters around the city in his civilian life.

As he said, he was familiar with Kori as a whole, both in his hero life and in his regular civilian life. Sure, Kori stood out quite a bit compared to him, but he still blended in well enough considering how many metahumans and aliens were now freely out on the streets living their respective lives. So, that wasn't the strange thing.

He'd have no problem breaking a nose or two anyway if they dared to say anything to Kori because of her outward appearance. Nope, his hands were already dirty from carrying the last stray mutt Damian adopted, he had no problem wiping his hands on the face of a close-minded son of a bitch.

That wasn't what was strange.

The strange thing was, in a way, that Jason had never before shown anyone (at least outside the family) that he was a daddy's boy. And no "Yeah, me and my old man have a good connection" nope.

Jason doesn't mince words in admitting that he's a TOTAL daddy's boy.

Sure, they have their differences, the occasional death threat, another punch in the face, and several tyre thefts… but he's still his dad. And best of all, Bruce still looks at him with all the fatherly love in the world.

Yes, they can yell at each other, but at the end of the day Jason will return with a pot of his favorite ice cream, to see how his dad has made him homemade orange biscuits and the two share both foods while having a sleepover on the big master bed in his dad's room.

Jason loves spending time with Bruce, as much as the newly revived Jason Todd-Wayne, as Redhood.

Obviously, Jason has more opportunity to be relatively or actively more affectionate than Redhood. Redhood is a bloodthirsty villain who came back from the dead and doesn't hesitate to chop off heads for the sins of the aggressors. If it weren't for the fact that he has a panic about anything to do with card games and anything to do with casinos, he would have been nicknamed the King of Hearts, as Kori jokes with him from time to time.

But, after a long mission, he can't be bothered to desperately search for his father in the wreckage of the disaster of the day.

He does that all the time.

But this time.

This time was completly different.

....................................................................

Kori doesn't remember much of what happened after the explosion.

Well, because there should never have been an explosion in the first place.

The mission was going great, not to mention all the villains downed. The information from the space base was safe, several henchmen were being held by the heroes and many others were trapped to be taken to their respective cells.

Well, all well and good, although they were still struggling with the few resistance fighters, nothing they couldn't control. She could see, out of the corner of her eyes, how Jason had Roy's back and vice versa, she was busy also on her part trying to bring down all those who were actively attacking her.

It was just like the cowboy movies that Roy forced Jason to watch from time to time or like those period movies that Jason watched obsessively.

The good guys were winning, and by the end of the day, that was what mattered most.

If it wasn't for hearing Superman's scream.... well, no one would have guessed. Even Flash had his difficulties escaping with as many heroes as he could get his hands on.

An explosion.

Big one. Brilliant. If it wasn't for that flash of light nearly blinding her during her escape process, she would have said it was one of the most magnificent things she'd ever witnessed.

People sometimes forget a small detail when they are in space.

Explosions need oxygen, they need air in order to expand and be fatally damaging. In space, where the most precious resource is oxygen... generating an explosion looks completely different.

It expands like a wave, a gigantic mushroom that takes out everything around it... but when it stops consuming oxygen, it moves like a wave of abrasive water seeking to consume everything it can until it is extinguished.

Tragically beautiful. Preciously lethal.

Jason had been pushed in time by Roy and a few fallen villains into one of the large travel tubes. Making them move somewhere in the world away from the blast. She'd made a giant protective bubble so she could at least protect herself from the damage of the blast; whether there were any cronies or villains with her didn't matter at that point.

She could see how Flash and Superman, using as much speed as they could, took out as many as they could. Those who could get to the had went that way, those who flew out took what they could.

What kind of madman was doing that? Probably a desperate villain, who knows.

But the damage was done.

She does what she can, moves the debris so she can clear the debris clogging the travel tubes, moves the broken glass.

It's all over. They had won anyway, those who perished would be honoured... now they had to see what damage remained. They had to see what could be done with what was left.

First she had to see Jason, Roy.

She had to see if Dick was all right, if Raven managed to get her friends out.

She had to make sure her loved ones were safe, or at least minimally damaged.

She sees that everyone is okay, and her soul returns to her body.

She sees that Jason is carrying Roy, who probably got hit during the escape, and her heart returns to her.

And she calms down a bit.

Until she doesn't notice the typical black cape billowing around.

There's no Batman.

And it breaks her heart to see her boyfriend's despair.

Because Jason notices it when he makes sure she's safe and well. After she tends to Roy's wounds and gives him a good check up.

She notices how her boyfriend's eyes widen in panic, his breathing quickens, how he runs and climbs all over the place looking for his father.

She does what she can to help him, you know?

She carries him to the top of the rubble, she helps him carry the fallen pieces of metal, she climbs with him when they notice a hole.

Both of them, but mostly Jason, open fallen doors, clean up the piles, search the emergency escape pods and search, to Jason's terror, among the fallen found in the rubble.

Kori does what she can. Because she loves Jason.

And for that very reason, she searches harder for Batman.

She doesn't care if her uniform gets torn, she doesn't mind getting her hands dirty or carrying Jason all over the place in search of her father.

Because Jason doesn't mind giving all that and more.

Because Jason doesn't mind having his fingernails and fingers shredded from digging with his own bare hands, he doesn't mind taking off his mask and letting others see his anguished face, he doesn't mind that his arms now have wounds from broken glass and leaking pipes.

If Jason doesn't mind, neither does she. She will catch her suffering, her tiredness and her pain so that she can transform it into determination. Jason need it her, so she would help. 

Because she knows Jason would do the same, and even more, for her.

She would only repay him with what he would do.

So he sets to work.

They keep searching, along with another group of heroes searching for their missing loved ones.

They keep searching, relentlessly, until they hear Jason's name.

Not the code name, not his heroic pseudonym, not his vigilante nicknames.

The name of her boyfriend.

They both turn, hopeful, and she doesn't hesitate to carry Jason and fly with him at full speed in the direction of the desperate screams. Screams that came from a very familiar voice.

Batman was alive.

Batman was alive, with a large bandage improvized on his right arm, being carried by one of the Green Lanterns.

Batman, no that was Bruce, desperately searching for Jason.

Bruce/Batman, who jumped out of the Green Lantern's arms and ran through the rubble looking to get to his son faster.

Jason, who was also being carried by her, who almost threw himself out of her arms to get to his father.

And she doesn't care.

It doesn't bother her that Jason threw himself when they were several feet off the ground or that Bruce probably ended up breaking his arm when he did the same.

She can only feel a heartbreaking relief that broke her boyfriend's worries.

More calmly and happily, she watched everything from a safe distance.

She watched as her boyfriend searched for more wounds from his father, who only felt around his son's body doing the same.

She watched with relief as Jason sobbed with happiness that his old father wasn't dead, hiding under the rubble or sailing through space indefinitely.

He watched as Bruce wept with relief that Jason had actually made it into one of those tubes and didn't have to suffer the impact first hand.

She didn't mind, she didn't mind being a mere observer of that wonderful spectacle of parental love. It was wonderful and beautiful in equal measure.

She loved watching the two of them look to each other to see that the other was well. She longed for that at times, to have the same with her own parents and siblings. So, inside her, she was happy to note that Jason had that with his father and that, within their relationship, he didn't have to hide that part of him.

She deeply appreciated how Jason was open with the emotions he felt about Bruce, even if they both had their bad phases. She loved when Bruce sought her out, to check in with Jason and ask if she could take care of him when the two of them were fighting about something.

That love was so pure, so beautiful, so perfect.

Who was she to be jealous, to discredit all that love they had for each other?

She was nobody, so she just encouraged it.

Because she loved that Jason adored everyone he loved with every cell in his body, loved how he made small, highly romantic details ar their dates.

Loved when he went to his dad's for courage or to hang out. She loved when the two of them would argue and find a way to apologize to each other; because at the end of the day they both still loved each other.

She loved that Bruce accepted her to be with his son, and that he respected them.

She loved how Jason had given her the privilege of knowing that part of him that he loves with passion, with care, with protection. Without fear, without fear, without fear, without censure.

So, when she notices that all the exhaustion now falls on her boyfriend's shoulders, what she does is call Superman, so that he can carry Bruce, while she carries Jason to a safe area so they can both rest.

She sets up an extra bed next to Jason's cot, because that's Bruce's designated spot. And she'll happily find a cate for another spot.

She will be Jason's girlfriend, but she knows that in those moments Jason needs his father and his father needs him.

So, when the next day she sees Jason, hugging his father to near crushing point, still in their respective shredded hero uniforms... she just takes their picture, leaves them alone and comes back to wake them both up with their favourite cups of coffee.

Happy to know that her boyfriend and his father are safe. And together.

[lycanthrope6221]

Sucide Squad: Kill the Justice League

Character Rant

Hi there here’s my thoughts on all the current operatives in Sucide Squad: Kill the Justice League. I’ll probably do another one of these for the Joker when he releases next month

Disclaimer, I’m a artist not a writer I suck I at writing and I really just wanted to get my thoughts down and put them out there also I’m writing this a after playing the game last night and my memory isn’t 100% I might have missed some things but oh well.

Spoilers!!! mostly just for gameplay I don’t really bring up the story.

Tw: Guns and violence

Harley Quinn:

Character-Loving her dialogue right now. Her voice fits well(duh it’s Tara strong), she has funny dialogue and unhinged dialogue she doesn’t feel forced or anything. I’m happy she’s moved on from the Joker and is trying to live her best life despite the bomb planted into her skull.

Movement- I’m going to be completely honest and say I think I might need to redo the tutorial for the bat grapple gun. All I do is fall…. Beside that it’s fun to swing around and grapple to building my brain keeps defaulting to Spider-Man 2 controls lol.

Combat- I know you can equip any weapon for any character but I’m just sticking to the type of gun they started with so my Harley’s only getting SMG’s and revolvers. I like beating aliens to a bloody pulp with Harley’s bat and I love revolvers in games like there so much fun to use.

Deadshot:

Character- So far it looks like Floyd is basically the voice of reason for the team. He has prior experience to mercenary work and it shows in the way he communicates with Waller i think this is a nice detail. He brings up his daughter sometimes and I really hope he gets to see her preferably not in alien invaded metropolis.

Movement- at first I struggled with the jet pack but after a couple stressful missions I finally got used to it. I don’t really have much to say about it, it’s a jetpack. Blast off woo hoo.

Combat- My Deadshot currently has a a sniper rifle and assault rifle. I’m so happy that the sniper rifles in this game aren’t heavy snipers and don’t take 10 years to reload cause I would be so so dead. I just got my first notorious weapon and it’s Black Mask sniper rifle and the floating back skulls were a jump-scare at first but honestly it gives the gun character.

Captain Boomerang-

Character- As a Tim drake fan I apologize for what I’m about to say. He’s slowly becoming harder and harder to hate. The voice actor and writers are just doing to good of a job also shot out to the animators whoever did facial animations for this game deserves double pay. He’s a dick and he sucks but in a funny way. Like ok Boomer rang why would you put a bomb into a child’s head? Yes that child is an omega level Metahuman but still! I would push him down a flight of stairs but I would also throw him down a granola bar.

Movement- When I first saw the trailer I thought this was “just revived from darkest night and now I have powers” Boomerang but no its some speed force copy cat gauntlet I think this was a good decision. I don’t hate his traversal it’s honestly pretty fun to throw boomerangs and go fast. Gotta go fast…

Combat- I love Boomerangs melee attack I love smacking people with a boomerang. I have a sniper rifle and a shotgun equipped. Shotguns are so much fun in this and doing the quick time thingys is really fun with them 10/10 shotgun lover 4lifers.

King Shark:

Character: King shark is such a neat humanoid shark. At first I thought he was just MCU Drax the destroyer in a different font but even though they both share a lot of tropes King Sharks love for learning reminds me more of Strong from fallout. I really like his design too, we don’t see a lot of 3d humanoid sharks out there and they nailed it.

Movement: King Shark uses his claws and glowing shark powers to jump high and run fast. I can’t really tell but I think he may be the fastest character. It might just be how easy he is to use but I don’t really notice any limitations like the others/its not screaming in my face like with dead shots jetpack over heating or Harley’s bat drone having a cool down. It’s also very cool to run around as a giant shark jumping off builds and plowing through crowds of aliens.

Combat- My King Shark is currently equipped with a heavy machine gun and a shotgun. The heavy gun is fine and kinda fun to use it pairs really well with his melee. King sharks melee attack is his 2 daggers that can cut through people and launch them into the sky so you can riddle them with bullets. That’s my favorite combo and you can do that with every character but King Sharks just seems cooler.

[jasontoddiefor]

“Bruce can’t kill! He’s not a cop. He will just beat the shit out of you, arrest you, and hand you over to the cops who he doesn’t even trust. Also he believes in redemption, which is why he utilizes the Gotham prison system despite it never being focused on redemption or rehabilitation and also he continues to utilize Arkham despite it canonically making everyone worse!”

The issue isn’t just that Bruce doesnt kill the mass murderers of Gotham, it’s that his moral stance has no nuance. He doesn’t believe in self defense or defense of others. If bane was killing Damian and Damian killed bane to save himself, Bruce would blame Damian. There’s no room in his ideology, it’s just as extreme and skewed as other characters. AND! He can’t just let it be his own ideology. He has to force it on other people as well

I‘m assuming the second one is from the same anon! If not I’ll still answer in one since they work together

You‘re bringing up multiple interesting points here so I‘m gonna break those down briefly!

Batman‘s (Legal) Authority

He’s a vigilante. He has been enemy of the force for a time. The fact that he’s allowed to operate at all hinges p much only on the fact that he’s going after criminals and Gordon like him. And the moment he goes after criminals that are on the “legal” side of things, he’s public enemy #1. He’s never had any kind of binding legal authority.

Violence used in arrests

Batman is violent. Sometimes it’s on purpose, to show him losing control and going to far, sometimes it’s just “Haha Batman go punch” comic book narration style. But we also see panels of Batman talking people down, not using violence as a first, middle, last and only resort. And my original point about that was that “beaten up” is still better than “dead”.

Reliability of the system

I mean, yeah we know the cops and Arkham suck but what else is he supposed to do besides what he’s already doing, weeding out corrupt cops and funding Arkham? He could start his own private prison but we’ve seen in other comics how much that Does Not Work. I think ultimately, Batman sees himself as an emergency service trying to pick up what the system itself can’t do while trying to fix it himself. Meanwhile, people still have to go somewhere.

Humanity/Morality of Batman

Bruce Wayne is a dick. Very my way or the high way, arrogant, and a man of extremes. He cares about people, about love, but Christ he‘s not a good communicator. He‘s got flaws, his inability to see nuance at times is certainly one of them. But what struck me - especially in Batman: The Knight, which was why I added that panel and cannot stop recommending that comic - was that Bruce defines himself by acting out of love, the want to protect, and the realization that if his mission is to save human life, he cannot take it. No matter how much he might resent a person or think they’d deserve it, if he became the kind of person that would kill for his mission, he’d become someone unrecognizable.

Batman‘s ideology as a frame

This is going to sound very dismissive and I promise I do not mean it that way. Batman is a character that says “we don’t kill, period. If you can’t do that, don’t do the job”. Like, that sounds incredibly offensive, but those are the standards to which he holds himself. I’m the best, I can do it without resorting to taking a life, so if you do the same job I’m doing, you should be just as able. Bruce didn’t really make any of his Robins his side kick, they more or less did that themselves, kicking and screaming, whether. Batman wanted them to be Robin or not. If they wanted to, they could drop out (ofc they don’t actually can bc we’d be left without any comics) but they don’t. So we’re back to Batman saying, “if you wanna do the job, you have to be able to do it this way”. Thus one of the Robins taking a life in self defense doesn’t fly because they’re supposed to be better. Is that particularly rational? Well, no, not necessarily, but that’s what it boils down to. If they had to resort to taking a life to save themselves, they shouldn’t have been in the position I’m the first place, but somewhere away from the fight. He trained himself until he could fight without taking a life and thus everyone else who wants to do the same should learn it as well.

All of these are associated with the whole discussion surrounding Batman killing, and you raise interesting points regarding how Batman operates and the hypocrisies involved. The last two are difficult to discuss particularly because we’re still reading comic book heroes and not actual legal irl batvigilante. I think this is still a step sideways from my original point that Batman’s refusal to kill on principle is a valid stance the character should be allowed to keep, but all of this is interconnected.

[yvtro]

Do you think that Jason should’ve stayed dead? I’ve never read Under the Red Hood, but I’ve read A Death in the Family, A Lonely Place of Dying, and a significant amount of New Earth arcs where Jason is presented as a martyr and his death is a point of character development for Bruce and Dick. Do you think this was more useful to the narrative than a resurrected Jason? Do you think that any aspect of his Red Hood identity has helped his character or added to his story?

i will need you to bear with me; i will bring lots of literary theory, tradition and philosophy into it. but i swear it’s actually relevant.

first of all, I think jason should have stayed alive. logically speaking, killing off the only at the time representation of that kind in the series, the only potential voice of the lower class (that wasn't a love interest) in bruce’s high soc world was already bad enough.

the thing about jason’s death is that it did play a role in the wider narrative, but not necessarily as a good point of character development for anyone at all. the way his image was completely distorted made his death look less dreadful than it was; there was barely ever any love in the way in which he was mentioned, which, imo, most of the time didn’t even make a martyr out of him; he was just a collateral victim that seemed to bring whatever he had upon himself. (and wouldn't it be much sadder if he was remembered for who he actually was?)

but you can’t argue with the fact that jason’s death set a completely new tone for most batman stories; nor ignore that it had a huge impact on the universe as a whole. you know how there was an unspoken rule that DC could bring anyone back, but jason? (look: peterson's "choices" in "a death in the family" reprint) that served a purpose; it was supposed to show that anytime your favourite character was killed off, maybe they weren’t actually coming back, because jay never did. and it also made batman into a real gothic story, with shadows of the past menacing in the background at all times.

now, at that time at least, you would have to be an idiot to bring back a character like that and make them proceed like any other comic book superhero who died 2748 times and came back. what I’m trying to say is that I do get why winick chose to make utrh a tragedy, because Jason (at that time) needed to haunt the narrative, dead or alive. the problem is, it doesn’t change that this decision was very insensitive. i think utrh could have came off as much less classist if winick tried to restore jason’s reputation as a kind, sensitive kid in the flashbacks, instead of going for the aggressive robin image. these flashbacks are mostly what makes the reader remember that even in the 80s original run bruce claimed he took jason in as a robin because otherwise jason would become a criminal. oh, that’s dramatic irony, isn’t it? but classism shouldn’t be a literary device. why not instead focus on another facet of tragedy, catharsis? why not show that there was love and care and that while fate/the system might have doomed jason, it wasn’t jason’s natural predisposition as a kid from the streets, but the opposite, really? that sort of self awareness surely would make the narrative less problematic.

another thing is that going back to jason’s original motivations without all the violent bullshit would make for a much better hauntology. see, western gothic’s hauntology is based on the horror of the Other. it disconnects the hero from the reality. and that's fun for a time, but gets tired when you read the same thing for decades. why not give it a romantic, eastern european in spirit twist? for context, eastern european romantic lit shares many themes with gothic lit, minus the inescapable horror of the other. because the spirits that come into the narrative are not there to remind people of their death; they are mostly there to remind them of what they died for or their life itself. they are there to link you with your ancestors, culture, etc., they are a way for you to connect with your roots. and i think such a twist would be perfect in jason’s story; instead of his death haunting him, it should be his life from before that taunts him at night. he should remember where he comes from, and the crime alley, for example, should be established not only as a place of trauma, but also source of his dedication to protecting his community. the ghosts of the past should bring you home.

i think this is a great thing about how convoluted and specific as a genre comics are, because you can rectify the previous narrative and commit to meta almost in-universe. if DC wanted to, they could address victim blaming, they could address classism, they could reconstruct the tragedy. and I think at this point it’s safe to say that jason’s death doesn't feel that significant in terms of the universe as a whole, so it’s a good moment to do that. it’s just that I doubt they will. 

but this would be my preference, because ultimately, there are themes in the red hood that i find very interesting (if they were properly overwritten that is). i don’t think jason failing morally is classist per se; i think what is classist is that it is implied that it was ingrained in his personality. and you could go in a much more endearing and heart-breaking route: to show him failing morally explicitly because he just cares so much about protecting other people that he can’t help himself and crosses the line (this would correspond nicely with the garzonas incident btw). and then, it would be very interesting to see him realising that crossing that line really means something, just as bruce said; that he ended up distancing himself from those that he wishes to keep safe, that he further isolates them and himself both. there would be value in a deconstruction like that, but there’s not much merit in his characterisation and storyline as it is, giving that the reasons for which he kills are all over the place (but that’s a topic for another post. i think it was @roobylavender who wrote a post about how jason's motives would make more sense if they were motivated by self-defense).

tldr; i think it all could be made into a great story still, if it referred to its own previous issues.

If you read that far I’m impressed btw. 

[benbamboozled]

Inspired by a recent discovery regarding Barbara and a sniper rifle (I can send pics if you wanna see) who do you see among bat affiliates as most likely to kill, or if they have, kill again?

PLEASE POST PICS PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE!

Ahem…

ANYWAY, let’s go ahead and just leave Jason as a free space.

I’m going to break this up into Batfam Who Have Killed (And How Likely They Are To Kill Again), and Batfam Who Haven’t Killed (And How Likely They Are To Do So).

(Also, sticking with the usual “core,” minus Jay for obvious reasons, so—Alfred, Bruce, Barbara, Dick, Cass, Steph, Tim, and Damian.)

(I’m also leaving Duke off because I just don’t know much about his character, I still have so many arcs to catch up on.)

NOW…

Batfam Who Have Killed (And How Likely They Are To Kill Again)

Alfred is number one on the list. He’ll straight up kill people (his weapon of choice is a goddamn SHOTGUN) and pretty much only holds back out of consideration for Bruce.

Next up I’d say Damian, because, as per the recent Robin series, he’s pretty much Krombopulos Mike from Rick and Morty (he just loves killin). Granted, he knows killing is bad and yadda yadda, but…kid wants to cut loose, and he’s good at it. Also, he’s trying to figure out his “thing.”

Third is Dick, in this category because he did, canonically, kill the Joker. Honestly, metatextually, I don’t think Dick is going to kill anyone again (even if Batman can bring them back to life). I think he’s become too “core” to the entire Batman ethos. (Hence why he keeps being chosen to kill Batman in the horror elseworlds, lol.) On a character level, I think Dick would absolutely kill again, BUT I think it would be less of a “I am choosing this” the way I see Alfred (and could see Damian) doing it, and more of an act of desperation or intense stress.

Fourth is Cass. OUTSIDE OF SOME HORRIBLE OOC BITS WE DON’T TALK ABOUT, Cass is the Batfam member who most believes in Batman’s No Killing philosophy. It’s not an optics things for her, or because it’s Batman’s rules, or about a symbol…she genuinely, whole-heartedly believes that killing is wrong. (But she did kill a guy so she goes in this category.)

Okay, now…

Batfam Who Haven’t Killed (And How Likely They Are To Do So)

Okay, possibly controversial, I’m going to put Tim as number one, for two reasons.

One—Captain Boomerang Death Trap.

Two—In the Robins mini he argues for letting the guy died who killed his mom and paralyzed his dad. It turns out to be (*sigh*) someone disguised as him, BUT their deception was based on Tim’s psychological profile, so even Tim’s like “Yeah, no, I probs woulda done the same thing, lol.”

So, yeah, Tim can definitely get pushed too far.

Next is Barbara! She’s actively associated with heroes who kill, her thoughts when Dick killed the Joker were “idk, maybe he shoulda stayed dead…would that’ve been bad…???” She’s the one I can most see choosing to kill someone as part of her philosophy, but she’s never put anyone in a death trap, so she’s second.

Third is Steph. Mostly because she’s one of the least likely Batfam members to completely fucking lose it, and I can’t see her taking up killing as an active philosophy. (Even outside of the fact that she believes in the Bat, I think if she were on the edge, she wouldn’t want to damage her relationship with Cass.)

Finally, there’s Bruce. Okay, this one is tricky because, on the one hand, Bruce is never going to outright kill someone in the actual canon continuity. It’s just not going to happen.

On the OTHER hand, he’s tried to kill people multiple times(!!!)—both in a “I’m making the active choice to kill this person” way AND a “heat of the moment” kind of way—and only been stopped by circumstances/other Batfam members.

So, metatextually, he’s last in this category, because it just won’t happen. On a character level, he’s first, because Bruce Wayne is like…constantly one ill-timed Kick Me sign away from finally going ape shitt.

OKAY WELP WENT AHEAD AND WROTE AN ESSAY! SOOOO there you have it!

Everyone, please feel free to disregard if it doesn’t line up with your thoughts, and apologies if I left out stuff from canon that would have impacted the list—see note above about Duke and being behind on reading.

[raven-at-the-writing-desk]

Character bingo for Ortho and Jack?

***Standard disclaimer: These are just my personal opinions of the character(s); regardless of what I may think of them, sharing my thoughts is NOT meant to offend or to shame anyone that thinks differently.***

***CONTENT WARNING: mentions death!***

This is going to sound so bad out of context, but I LOVE dead children.

... in fiction only, of course! It legitimately opens up many interesting avenues of discussion and exploration within the stories they exist in. This holds true for Ortho and the role he plays in Idia’s life, and especially in episode 6′s main conflict. Episode 6 didn’t really focus as much on Ortho’s inner thoughts as much as it did for Idia’s, but I could only imagine what kinds of existential questions and dread were swirling around in Ortho’s circuit boards before and during his decision to act outside the bounds of his programming.

I think that a lot of people underestimate Ortho because he’s technically younger than everyone else at NRC, or because he’s a robot rather than a living being, but it’s because of his youth and his status as an inorganic being that makes him so much deeper than you may think he is. Imagine being Ortho, who exists solely as an entity to help someone else cope with loss. You’re hyper aware of what your purpose is, that you’re just imitating someone else, that you’ll never truly be loved and never truly be able to replace what was lost. And yet... you still want to help that person you call your creator and your brother, because you just want to see him happy, because even if Idia doesn’t have faith in his future, Ortho always will have that faith for him. MAN, IT JUST BRINGS A TEAR TO MY EYE WHENEVER I THINK OF IT 😭

Pre-episode 6, I still loved Ortho because having a little kid in the cast really shakes things up! I He has an air of innocence and the curiosity of a child, but also processes data in a very cold and calculating way... like the robot that he obviously is. That contrast is just so cool, and it made me get really invested in learning more about Ortho and why he is the way he is. DJIASBSODIABD S THIS MIGHT ALSO SOUND KINDA SUS BUT I THINK IT’S HILARIOUS THAT HE HOLDS THE SCHOOL AT GUNPOINT JUST TO SAVE HIS BROTHER 🥺 That’s how you know it’s true familial love, when you threaten to laser beam a building full of innocent bystanders to the ground to force them to rescue your family 💞 And because Ortho is a kid, his mischief comes off as cute, well-intentioned mistakes rather than the purposeful dick moves most of the rest of the boys pull off. I WOULD HAPPILY EXCUSE ORTHO OF ANY CRIMES HE COMMITS 😤 BUT FUCK EVERYONE ELSE. I just wish people would overlook him as a character just because he’s a kid 😓

If there’s one major gripe I have about pre-episode 6 Ortho, it’s that he didn’t seem very... well-defined, if that makes sense? Like, the vast majority of the time I saw him, it was in some relation to his brother. It felt like Ortho couldn’t really act or do anything on his own without somehow being tied back to Idia or having to ask for Idia’s help (and in hindsight, I completely understand why this may have been intentional, because it made the payoff in episode 6 so much more impactful). I’m SO glad the Ortho-Idia dynamic was improved and that my precious robot son can finally be free to do whatever he damn well pleases 🥺 When I saw Ortho in his College Gear for the first time... man, I felt like a proud parent that had just witnessed my one and only child’s graduation ceremony................................

JUST SO I CAN END MY THOUGHTS WITHOUT SOBBING ON MY KEYBOARD, I want to say that Ortho has some of THE best outfits in the entire game. I don’t care what anyone else says, the fact that Ortho is a robot adds to (NOT detracts from) his wardrobe. He can’t wear “normal” clothes like everyone else, so it forces the TWST devs to get very creative when designing Ortho’s equivalents. He can have all these extra functions and attachments that no one else has because he’s a robot, and that really enhances his ensembles. His coolest look by far has to be the Fairy Gear; it’s so fancy ✨ Plus, the outfit holds a lot of character significance, seeing as 1) it’s designed by Crewel rather than Idia, his usual designer and 2) Ortho puts the outfit together himself AND comes up with a special addition to his routine using it, all WITHOUT Idia’s help. The Fairy Gear helped cement Ortho’s new identity, and his special place in my heart.

“I don’t really have much to say about them.” **PROCEEDS TO GO OFF ABOUT HIM ANYWAY**

I apologize to all Jack stans, but he is just not that memorable to me. I think part of the issue is that Jack doesn’t have a clear connection to a particular Disney character or even a group of characters, unlike Leona (who is twisted from Scar) Ruggie (who is twisted from the 3 hyenas). For a game that so heavily markets itself using the Disney logo and its properties, it’s so odd to me that Jack doesn’t seem to be based on any particularly prominent wolf characters across the plethora of things The Mouse owns. There’s nothing wrong with that, of course! It just makes it difficult for my brain to remember Jack 💦 especially when he’s competing with Leona, who has the most powerful presence in Savanaclaw, and Ruggie, who I find to be much more adorable.

Inspiration for Jack aside, I don’t care for his design. I don’t mind a character with an intimidating looking face, but I don’t like how muscular he is or the weird spiky haircut he has (which???? I think is a mullet in the back????). To me, Jack’s best physical attribute is his fluffy tail, but I stop short of wanting to actually touch it or to pet him because he’s a wolf 😔 which is closely related to dogs... and I’m scared of dogs asdhlabyafibifabispfossdipb SORRY JACK

In terms of his actual role in the main story, I thought that he was severely lacking and didn’t fully meet my expectations. I was under the impression that the first years in particular would play major roles, with Ace and Deuce being the main duo tagging along with MC. However, to me it really felt like Jack was just... there, not contributing much and not saying much either. He did do important things in episode 2 (namely telling MC and co. about Leona’s plans), but I thought the way his unique magic was introduced was kind of ham-fisted and could have been executed better. It also did not help that episode 2 had the weakest storytelling out of the entire main story, so whatever Jack did happen to do didn’t get the proper chance to shine because of how poorly constructed the events surrounding him were. I don’t know, maybe Jack just generally came off as having no presence because he’s more of a stoic character that prefers to keep to himself rather than actually interact with others 💦

When Jack returned in episode 3, I felt that his role was greatly diminished and he didn’t offer much to the team despite being present. Ace was the distraction while people snuck into the museum, the Savanaclaw mob students helped overtake the Mostro Lounge while Ruggie swiped the key they needed off of Azul, and Leona stole the contracts. Compared to all of that, Jack kind of felt like more of a detriment than a help (for example, Azul spotting Jack’s tail when the were hiding after breaking into his office), or just generic extra muscle they needed around. I know there’s more to Jack’s character than that, but the main story certainly isn’t doing him any favors. Epel not only got more screen time in episode 5 AND episode 6, but also actively contributed to the VDC team and the rescue team; I wish that Jack had been allowed to do just as much.

Outside of the main story, I still don’t find him to be very interesting. Like... yes, I get that he’s a Good Boi (TM) beneath his scary face and standoffish “lone wolf” attitude, but I don’t find that alone to be compelling. I’m just not a fan of the “looks like he can kill you, but is actually a cinnamon roll” trope in general, so ashdbasoidbapds Jack unfortunately hits a lot of the points I dislike.

If it’s of any consolation, I do think that he’s substantially more interesting when he’s interacting with others (particularly when it’s a really REALLY shitty person, because then we get to see their personality and Jack’s clashing). One of the few things I do like about Jack is his strong moral conviction; it’s fascinating to see how that plays out with the scummier characters in the cast and how Jack vows to stick to his moral compass and live up to his promises even if they are for people he thinks are sketchy (like when he works for the Mostro Lounge to atone for trashing some of Jade’s mushrooms). Jack also has no issues calling others out on their bullshit (ie fake Octavinelle’s crying, Ace heckling him, Leona’s foul play in episode 2, etc.); it’s these moments that I really enjoy and wish that we got more of. I don’t necessarily think Jack is “wasted potential” (which is why I didn’t check that box off in the Bingo board for him), because I can’t think of what exactly is “missing” or could make him ‘better” in my eyes. I think the TWST team definitely did try to make Jack loveable but it just fundamentally does not appeal to me.

[storytimewithnova]

Single parent

Prologue

You figure Tooru Oikawa as a normal high school guy right and you’d be right to a point See that is not all he is oikawa is a single parent to two sons Oikawa Shoyo and Oikawa Kenma there dad up and split he was from another school A teacher And this guy just wanted Kawa for his body no strings attached so when Kawa dropped it on him he could have kids and was having kids this asshole up and left Kawa to struggle alone.

So that brings us to the present here and now and once again Oikawa was late for practice no explanation why and he was getting let off for it again and the team was getting sick of it to the point they wanted to follow Kawa to find out what could be so important that it makes him late every day so they followed Kawa home only he didn’t go straight back home he went to a daycare

Chapter one

Tooru’s pov

Tooru:Hi miss were they any trouble

Miss Yula:Good as gold as always you have two angels there Oikawa

Tooru:I know that and I love them both so much

Miss Yula:it’s not easy being a single parent Kawa don’t be scared to ask for help

Tooru:I’ve brought my sons up on my own this far without that low life dead beat that did a runner as so as he found out I can get pregnant sorry miss I know it’s not your fault it’s just a sore subject for me

Tooru Ran

Tooru:so did my babies be good

Shoyo:Yesh Momma

Tooru:Sunshine what happened to your face look At mommy for a minute

Sho turned his face for Kawa to see

Tooru:sunshine did one of the kids do this

he nodded

Tooru:okay let’s go home get this cleared up before it gets infected and sunshine listen mommy can’t take you and Ken Ken to daycare tomorrow I may have to bring you to my school will you promise to behave and mommy get ice cream after

The two nodded The team watch him

The team mumbling: why does he call himself mommy and whose kids are they maybe his brothers

Iwaizumi:nah his an only child as far as I know

Makki:Let’s follow him home

Tooru:babies dinner then bath Shoyo help your baby brother

Shoyo:Yes momma

Kenma:momma where is dadda

Tooru:dead in a ditch for all I care

he mumbled under his breath

Tooru:babies you're too young to understand I better call my school let them know you are coming with me because I can’t take you to daycare and I think tomorrow what I am going to do I go volleyball then collect all my class work and we get ice cream how does that sound and I spend all my time with my two favouite sons

Shoyo:really momma can we watch you play I want to be a setter

Tooru:of course my sunshine

Tooru looked over at Kenma he was trying to wat paste

Tooru:Kenma sweetie no no no here oh what a mess Sho help your brother

Shoyo:Otay

Tooru:no sweetie it’s Okay

With the team

Makki:He is so good with them I see why he is the team mom

Makki said Iwaizumi was watching like he heart shaped eyes.

Makki:Iwa you okay

Iwaizumi:huh? Oh yeah

Kunimi:Iwaizumi senpai your basically drooling Jesus” wait look he's on the phone listen

Tooru’s phone call 📞

Tooru:Hey Kiyoko Ni

Kiyo:📞Hey Tooru how are my Nephews

Tooru:Hang on Sunshine do you want to talk to auntie Kiyo

Shoyo:yesh

Kiyo: 📞 Hey sweetie you looking after mommy

Shoyo:Yesh but momma sad”

Kiyo:📞 is that so Angel do you want to put mommy on so he can tell me”

Shoyo:otay Momma Antie Kiyo wants you

Tooru: okay baby take you brother

Shoyo:otay

Tooru:baby it Okay remember Okay break the word up sweetheart

Shoyo:“O-Kay

Tooru:well that’s a start any way Kiyoko Ni sorry I have to correct him

Kiyo:📞 No it cute anyway Shoyo said you were sad

Tooru:well his not wrong I am also angry I guess I haven’t forgiven Klaus for up and leaving as soon as he found out I was Pregnant Dick move on his part now kenma wants to know when daddy is coming back

Kiyo:📞yes it was a shitty move but remeber what you got our of it

Tooru:True but how are you meant to say to a kid your daddy is never coming back because that abusive bastard just up and bailed on his own kids and simply said fuck this shit I’m out you mean nothing to me now I only need you for your body and now you have kids you are practically useless to me good luck with the brats peace out his exact words”

Back with team

Matsun:Did we hear that right the kids are his that guy he is talking about said he only wanted him for his body That is basically R@pe he knows That right

Back with Kawa and the call

Tooru:Seriously sis i haven’t even told the school that my babies dad is an ex teacher oh well like you said i got something Precious out of it

Kiyo: 📞exactly baby bro you spent this long which is what a 1 year and half raising those kids by yourself and you have done fabulous don’t get me wrong but they do need a dad”

Tooru: I know but I don’t think I can trust again my trust and heart was broken with Klaus I might have a crush but is a stupid high school crush I have to be muture I’m a parent at the end of the day I can’t focus on love

Kiyo📞 Well enlighten me who you have a crush on

Chapter Two

Kawa’s pov My crush is Iwa chan not that I ever tell him or say it out loud to his face but right now I am still on the phone to my cousin and she has been teasing me non stop

In the phone call with Kiyoko 📞

Tooru:My childhood friend Iwa chan but I can’t trust myself to fall again and let myself get hurt

Back with the team

Omg he's been through so much he has trust issue

Iwaizumi:the thing is I love him too have done since when we were kids why didn’t I know about this Klaus guy

Shoyo:Momma someone is outside

Tooru:okay sweetie I’ll have a look

Kawa’pov I went to see who was outside and saw my team Standing there to say i was shocked would be an understatement

Tooru:what are you guys doing here?

Matsun:Honestly Kawa we were worried about you all this coming late to practice and looking tired can you blame us

Tooru:how much did you hear

Makki:all of it we’re sorry

Shoyo:Momma who they

Tooru:mommy’s friends sunshine go back to your brother

Shoyo:Okay

Tooru:wait what did you say?

Shoyo:Okay

Tooru: you finally said it right baby well done

Shoyo:Tank you momma

Tooru:okay well baby steps now I’m going to invite my friends in okay you are going to be polite at all times and look after you brother

Shoyo:me good boy i go to ken now

Tooru:thank you sunshine I am guessing you have questions guys come in

Back in the call

Tooru:Kiyoko Ni I am going to have to call you back my team followed me home and heard everything

Kiyo:📞 well now is you chance to tell Iwa how you feel

Tooru:bitch did you not hear a word I say about trust issues

Kiyo:📞 yeah yeah whatever bye bro

Chapter Three

Kawa’s narrative

I looked over to my kids only to see Kenma trying to eat a Lego brick I swear that kid will just put anything in his mouth i worry for him *signs*

Tooru:no sweetie no we don’t eat that are you hungry come on you guys can sit Sho stay with mommy’s friends while mommy sorts your brother out

Shoyo:okay momma

Tooru:and sunshine

Shoyo:Yesh momma

Tooru:Tell you brother no more silly questions

Kenma:Huh?

Tooru:Oh he heard me

Kenma:my qests not silly

Tooru:sweetie you literally asked me yesterday who switches on the moonlight

the team giggle

Kunimi:hey that seems like a genuine question to me captain

kunimi said

Tooru:Kunimi please don't encourage my son

Kawa walks back in with Kenma and says

Tooru:sorry about that anyway

Makki:captain we said we heard everything we meant Everything

Iwaizumi:Tooru I am your childhood bestfriend why didn’t know about this Klaus guy what he did to you can be classed as R@pe

Tooru:maybe but out of something horrific i received something precious and that’s how I’ve always looked at it yes I may Have lost the ability to love

Iwaizumi mumbled

Iwaizumi: please don’t say that because I love you

Tooru:Huh what was that Iwa chan

Sho heard and parroted back

Shoyo:he said please no say that I wuv you

Tooru:so if I am getting what Sho said you said Iwa you said Please don’t say that because I love you

Iwaizumi:why you Little snitch

Sho sticks his touge out Sometime later the rest of the team left leaving Iwa and Kawa alone to talk….

Chapter four

Tooru:Iwa I know it’s not completely ideal I am a single parent two kids still in high school and have trust issues I am broken I get you love me and I do like you in fact I have loved you since we were kids but I am scared to let myself fall in love again scared I will get hurt again scared if I rush in head first again I will end up more damaged Than I already am and lord know how that will affect my kids their affected now not having their deadbeat dad around

Iwaizumi: Like you said i may not be ideal but we will figure something out together if you will Let me help you out with the kids I love them they are cute kids Tooru you have done Fabulous on your own but you are struggling I will treat them like they are mine they won’t know also in regards of my feelings I wait for you however long it takes

Tooru:you’re serious about this

Iwaizumi:when have you ever known me to joke

true he has never made a joke he wanted to do this so they agreed And Iwa was around more the kids called him daddy he loved every single minute with them right now he was playing with Shoyo because Kenma was napping

Shoyo:daddy why mama always sad

Shoyo asked out of the blue Kawa heard the question and answer it

Tooru:I’m not sad sweetie tell you what how about tomorrow you and Ken come watch me and daddy play volleyball would you like that

Shoyo:yay otay let me go get Ken Ken and tell him

Tooru:you do that baby he should be waking up from his nap now

Chapter five

the next day and Kawa and Iwa brought the kids to the school gym

Matsun and makki:morning kids

Shoyo:Ohayo

Shoyo said with a big smile Kenma just waved and cuddled up to Kawa more

Tooru:sweetie what did mommy say about socialising

Kenma;can’t

Tooru:yes you can even if it one or two words

Shoyo:try it Kenken I’m here look take my hand there you Go Ni chan Got you

Kenma:H-h-hello

kenma said then hugged his brother

Shoyo:yeah kenma Ni did it

Kenma ran to Kawa

Tooru:well done baby do you want to play volleyball with daddy now

Kenma:mhm

Tooru:okay take your big brother mommy will be with you in a bit then we can go to get Dino nuggets

Shoyo and Kenma’s lit up after hearing that they yelled together

Kenma and shoyo:MOMMY’S THE BEST EVER

Chapter six

Practice continued as normal and let’s be honest having the kids around saw a huge change in the team as well Kyotani who is normally Rude violent Bad mannered and has severe anger issues kind of mellowed out with the kids around and was playing and tossing the volleyball he even got them chocolate milk and Ice cream he told them not to tell their mom it would ruin his image as the tough guy

Shoyo:Uncle Kyo

Kyotani:yes sunshine

Shoyo:why do you put on that Tough guy act anyway when your really a softy who hurt you

Makki:well kid his a Juvenile delinquent

Shoyo:😕❓❓❓ huh?

Iwaizumi:You will understand when you are older kiddo

Kyotani:no one wants to hear from the meme lords that Live vicariously through the Internet so Makki button it I only have a soft side for kids and yabaha

Kenma:mommy can we go to training camp with you

Tooru:what do you think guys they seem to love being round you also you guys are helping Kenma be more socialable and training camp might be another step to help his social anxiety

Iwaizumi:I agree with Kawa and we need Kenma to open up more

The day of the training camp you would think nothing exciting happened right well almost true the boys deadbeat asshole dad wanted to pay a visit

If you wanted to know what their deadbeat dad looks like

Tooru:Niklaus why the fuck are you here

Niklaus:can’t I see my sons Tooru

Tooru:how about no klaus they are never going to know what they are you have a daughter with Hayley got back to her

Niklaus:Tooru please let me make right with them

Tooru bared his fangs

Tooru:I said NO!!

he growled

Iwaizumi:Tooru your teeth

Iwa said Kawa covered his mouth

Niklaus:oh little wolf you haven’t changed

Tooru:fuck off Klaus my kids are better off with out you barstard they have a dad and he ain’t you if they want to see you in the future then they’ll call NOW GO

he growled again his wolf side showing a deadly and menacing Urge to attack

Shoyo:Who was that mommy

Shoyo asked

Tooru:someone you are to young to meet and he is bad man

Shoyo:okay me and Ken Ken are going to uncle bokuto he is going to show me his service ace

Tooru:have fun kiddo and don’t try any risky moves mommy will be in a bit

Iwaizumi:so are you going to tell me what that was or am I going to have to guess

Tooru:signs* “I am a wolf leader of the wolfs now last of my pack that asshole was my sons deadbeat dad he is a hybrid vampire and wolf hence why you saw my fangs when that dick tried to get to my boys

Iwaizumi:wait what so those supernatural stories you told the kids and told me when we were kids

Tooru:are true they will be like him a hybrid but the have a witch side they will discover their powers at 16 now I understand if you want to leave us

Iwaizumi:hold your horses Tooru who says I am going anywhere

Tooru:Thanks Iwa for loving us even though you know the truth let’s go back to the kids

Chapter seven

Time skip Shoyo and Kenma have grown up and they have discovered their powers Kenma uses his witch powers do his homework and to keep a track of his brother at all cost and Shoyo is leaning to control his wolf and vampire side he doesn’t like using his witch side not like Kenma who found he could use it to be lazy or use it in volleyball and not just to confuse the opposition also Iwa and oikawa was married

the kids never asked about Klaus and they were happy and As for Klaus he could see he wasn’t wanted in his boys life but he did tell hope about them so if hope wanted to know about her brothers she could and like wise for Kawa he told the boys they have a half sister if they ever want to know her they can earning from shoyo

Shoyo:Ew a girl Cooties

Kenma:Shoyo she’s our sister she isn’t contagious

Shoyo:how do we know Ken Ken

Kenma:she is like us blood of a wolf and An orginal aka the deadbeat

Tooru:Kenma he is still your dad

Kenma:no he isn’t you married our dad he was a sperm donor I-

Tooru: hold it right there son where did you learn that

Kenma:uncle Makki

Iwaizumi:oh really well you can tell uncle Makki he is dead

Kenma:yes dad

And that is the single parent story

[chryzuree]

okayyyyyy modern au addendum where after chrysi and jacks kiss (and jacks then turns chrysi down because castor liking her, thus starting a fight/awkward silence in their friendship), castor ends up being the one to volunteer to take chrysi home after her car doesn’t start (at some sporting event or somethingggg. also jacks was there & chrysi was pleading him w her eyes to take her home instead, but he walked away to avoid confrontation. cool move, man. not at all a dick move.)

on the way home, castor confronts her abt the kiss she had with jacks. he defs starts getting heated abt it, and chrysi’s pretty determined to be like, “listen, i have turned you down time and time again. i kissed jacks, because i liked him. then he let me down easy & said he respected his friendship with you more, like a good friend would. what the fuck else do you want me to say?” <- trying so hard not to freak out because castor is speeding down a road with blind turns.

the argument gets abruptly cut off by castor taking a sharp turn and swerving a little into the oncoming lane. unfortunate for both of them, the car coming around also took the turn a bit wide, and thus, collision!!!!

it hits the driver side hard enough to kill castor on impact. chrysi winds up in a coma, as does the other driver (yay, trucks for being hardier than a typical car?).

obvi jacks finds out abt this & is wracked w guilt bc he could’ve prevented this if he’d swallowed his pride and dealt with an awkward drive home. when chrysi wakes up, he tries to work up the courage to visit her in the hospital, but he never quite manages to muster it up.

once he finally has the energy and bravery to visit chrysi at her home, he finds she’s left & admitted herself to an inpatient psychiatric facility, on account of her trauma (read: the girl that sees ghosts finally has a ghost haunting her that she knew in life & it’s fucking her up pretty badly… imagine waking up from a coma to talk to the guy that had been driving you home, only for the nurse to come in and be like “umm… castor valor DIED…..” then WHO WAS PHONE???). chrysi DID leave an address, in case any of her friends wanted to write her letters or anything, and her sister gives it to jacks. he never writes her any letters.

anywayyyy, years down the line, the driver of the truck that hit them ends up contacting chrysi (after she’s checked out of the facility & she’s off doing her ghosthunting things w her beautiful, beautiful boyfriend, azure lafaye) and asking if they can meet so he can apologize for what he’d done. chrysi gladly agrees and takes him out to dinner!!! she forgives him for what he’d done, since it was mostly because of his fatigue and castor’s idiocy that they collided at all.

over the following few years, chrysi and the driver become penpals 🥰 they meet up on occasion as well!!

buuuuut castor’s become super bitter & blames the guy for his death. and, yeah, uh. he’s still haunting chrysi (as best he can, anyway.. chrysi’s learned a lot of ways to keep her house ghost-free). fortunately, he’s a vv weak ghost and can’t do much, so chrysi doesn’t view him as a threat + she’d feel bad abt sending castor packing since she was there when he died. she knows how lonely he feels… and she knows it makes him uncomfortable to see everyone he knew from high school grow up… she’s got some sympathy left in her.

big mistake, btw. bc honora valor figured out a way to bring castor back from the dead & his first order of business, as an undead monster, is to kill chrysi’s penpal :((((