#and again I need to just learn to stop getting so attached to people it’s just abdjfktk hard for me not to but each time I hurt others or

[skunkox]

"Until he gets tired of me."

That's was Darlin's answer anytime someone questioned their relationship with Sam. A pircing but deep pain would shoot through their chest every time they said it. But it was always said in a joking tone and a movement to distract the other person from their face.

No one needed to see how that thought may have hurt them. They knew what they were getting into from jump. Darlin' felt safe. Safer than they had felt in a long time. They found that safety in Sam and were grateful for it. Nothing is promised, and to have had Sam in their life at all was a blessing and a mercy.

As much as they hated the thought of Sam ever leaving them, Darlin' could never blame him. They'd fucked up so many times in their life. People had gotten hurt. They were reckless. In being so, caused Sam to strain himself to care and worry for them.

There were day they wished Sam would just pack up and go. To rid himself the headache of their presence. But whenever they woke, he was always right there, holding them close and tightly.

He'd never do that, though. It was obvious to anyone who actually bothered to see them together. The tenderness in his eyes. The gentleness of his touch. The vampire was beyond sprung for the wolf. He was happy. Like he was finally healing.

Sam wouldn't be going anywhere. Sam learned that about himself very quickly after the first couple of meetings. Darlin' knew as well. A part of their brain screamed to believe otherwise. They hadn't done anything to deserve his grace. His patience. His love. Love that was promised to them until the end of their time.

"Do you think Count Yee-Haw will stay?"

The question had been asked once again. This time, by a young boy named Carlos. He had gotten attached to Darlin' as a toddler and was one of the few pack members that was genuinely happy to see them back.

Count Yee-Haw was the nickname the the pack kids had given Sam. Only they could call him that, though. It was a name bestowed upon him after the collective decided to put his vamp strength to the test. The poor man was literally dog piled and left to hold and stumble around with a minimum of 8 kids hanging off his frame like ornaments. It was a title he was growing fond of.

"Probably. At least until he gets tired of me." Darlin gave the boy a half-hearted smile and pulled forward the hood of his jacket.

"I heard some of the adults talking. They said that he wouldn't stay when you get older." Carlos admitted, frown all too clear on his face. "It's stupid. He obviously loves you. And you're happy now. Isn't that enough?"

The words spoken came from a place of care. Carlos had missed his favorite rebel and defender of Asher's antics. Truth be told, he was worried Darlin' would become uneasy around the pack again and got MIA again. They were more stable with the southern vamp at their side.

Darlin' was about ready to hug the kid in an attempt to soothe his nerves. But a single thought ran through their head. Carlos was a sweet kid. But what he said was just a little nice? Too nice to come from a tween.

"Besides. I don't think you'll ever stop being weird. A d he already talks like an old ma-." Darlin' cut him short with a smack to the back of his head.

"If you think that, why even ask?"

"Because I know you hear them too. And I don't want you guys to go anywhere."

🦇🐺🦇🐺🦇🐺🦇🐺

If you read all that, I'm sorry.

Labeling this as part 1 cause I'm tired. Sorta been drained all week. Hoping to get actually rest this weekend and do a part 2. I have a habit of starting things and not finishing.

AO3 scares me, so small shit will remain here for the time being.

[whimsyprinx]

i think I just need to stop clinging to and getting so attached to people

[canthelpit0]

Cry Baby

Pairing: Matt x crybaby!popular!reader

Wordcount : 3.3K+

Summary: you were popular. The jester of the group. But atleast it was something. Nobody knew just how much you’d been struggling, until your secrets were exposed in the school cafeteria.

Warnings: swearing, angst, crying, mentioned of depression, Matt’s PoV, sensitive!reader, mentions of SH, SH mocking, humiliation, exposing secrets, fake friends, hurt/comfort, pet names (baby), use of y/n

(A/N: I wrote this based of this song. Bcs I was listening to it and had this scenario in my head, so I wrote it down.)

You had always been a bit of a crybaby.

You’re the oldest sibling. Your mother thought she couldn’t have any children, but she had. You were a blessing to her.

So after you were born you were never put down. Someone was always with you. To keep you from crying, entertaining you. Caving to your needs.

But once you got to kindergarten, it seemed that all those times your parents hushed you and made sure you didn’t cry had bottled up.

You didn’t speak a lot. You didn’t like socializing with people. You kept to yourself and that’s how you liked it.

You had severe attachment issues to your mom though. Because of her always being with you to soothe you, her not being there seemed like a nightmare.

So when she dropped you off at kindergarden, every day, you would cry, begging your mom to stay.

Eventually you got used to it, but you quickly found a friend to cling to.

Emma, was your one and only friend. The only person you talked to.

It was pretty much the same in elementary school. You’d trod around and talk to people. You were a bubbly social kid.

But you were also easy to break.

You didn’t have a lot of friends. All friends you had were only people you’d hang around in recess.

Emma stuck with you though.

Until, middle school.

In middle school you’d, for some reason, fallen into a depressive mindset.

Emma and you were in your awkward middle school phases. And in that time she’d become really rude.

And one day during a fight she told you how much she hated listening to your sobs.

You’d been vulnerable around her. You had trusted her.

And she’d broken that trust. By telling you that every time you had seeked her comfort she actually didn’t want to give it to you.

Your heart’s too big for your body.

You two stopped talking after that day. Until four months later Emma apologized for her words. You, being an empath, excepted the apology and went back to being friends with her.

Little did she know that her words rang through your head while you cut yourself.

A few months after you became friend again, she moved. She moved out of the country. You never saw her again.

So for high school you had taken it spoon yourself to mask your depression and ‘get over yourself’.

You started to dress more basic, learning to do your make up, hair, skincare. And basically everything to hide your miserable state the best you could.

Somehow it worked.

You had good facial proportions, and just a little bit of work you looked like a basic mean girl who is full of herself. But that was exactly the point.

Somehow, once High school started, you managed to get into the clique of the popular girls.

You were always so upbeat, cheery and talkative. No one could ever guess that you’re the most depressive mother fucker in a 50 mile radius.

Though as much as you would like the power of being the leader of the group, you were not. You were more like the jester of the group than anything.

You had held your mental breakdowns to a minimum. Holding back as much as you could. You only had Few panic attacks nowadays. And if you had one in school, you always had a touch up make up bag there.

Now it was senior year. You got ready like usual, not knowing that today would alter your life and the way people perceive you.

Matt’s PoV

I watch in horror.

Y/n is one of the popular girls in our school.

I’m not too popular. But I’m well known, all due to the fact that I’m a triplet. And due to the fact that Nick and Chris are really extroverted people.

Both of them are currently not with me.

Chris is sick at home. While Nick is in the library with some of our female friends.

I sit at my table with the lacrosse team around Me.

The entire cafeteria has their eyes focused on y/n.

She was arguably the prettiest out of all the popular girls.

But right now she was crying, Biting her lip. Her head tilted forward in shame at the claims her group was throwing at her.

The leader of the popular girls, Kelly, was accusing y/n of stealing her boyfriend at first, yelling right in her face. She yelled right back at Kelly though, not scared to stand up for herself.

But Kelly being the leader of the group, all the other girls sided with her.

I never understood why people would talk, or would argue, about stuff like this in public places. It was humiliating.

I was getting second hand embarrassment just watching.

The insults were getting more and more personal by the second.

Nobody was doing anything, captivated by the scene unfolding in front of them. Some people have their phones out filming for, ..who knows what reason.

I drown out most of the insults-

“IS THAT WHY YOU FUCKING CUT YOURSELF?” Kelly yells right back in y/n’s face.

The cafeteria had already been quiet. But with those words even the quiet conversations stopped. It seemed like everyone’s attention snapped back to the scene.

It was the passerby effect in full force. No one was doing anything, too shocked. Not even the teachers that were present said anything.

It was so quiet you could hear a pin drop.

My ear start ringing, my eyes staying glued on y/n.

To me, it was obvious that something about y/n was off. She was polished to perfection. To a concerning degree. Nobody was that perfect.

So the revelation didn’t necessarily shock me. But the fact that Kelly was heartless enough to air y/n’s business out like that.

“I don’t.” Y/n’s words cut harshly through the quiet cafeteria. Her words are insistent like she was telling the truth.

She was a great liar, yet everyone would believe Kelly over her. Even if it was a lie.

“Oh but you do.” Kelly scoffs looking at the people y/n used to call friends. They all nod at Kelly’s statement.

“You have those scars all over your wrists.” Kelly points out nodding down to y/n’s wrists.

It’s like everyone takes a collective look down at her arms to see if something is actually there.

Me being so far away from their table I can’t see it clearly. But I really don’t want to anyway.

I watch as Y/n lets her head fall forward letting out a small laugh, shocking everyone in the cafeteria including me.

Y/n’s hands are trembling and shaking. She purses her lips looking back up at Kelly who looks at her with superiority.

Y/n picks her head back up and leans her head up to readjust her hair. Her hands ball into fists before she crosses her arms, trying to keep her composure.

Even from being a few tables away from the scene i can clearly see the tears running down her cheeks.

She huffs a laugh through a sob.

“Some friends you fucking are” she says harshly her glare focused on the girls around Kelly that she used to call friends.

The cafeteria is silent again for a moment the only thing heard being y/n’s soft sniffles

“Crybaby” one of the girls huffs under her breath, but its loud and clear in the silent cafeteria.

“Fuck you Rebecca.” I hear y/n’s voice snap at the girl. Despite crying her tone was still sharp.

“What’re you gonna do about it, gonna go home and cut yourself some more?” Another one of the girls in the group scoffs.

Y/n lets out another miserable chuckle hearing the comment.

I purse my lips remaining seated. I probably look miserable right now. I don’t want to be watching this. Hell I would like to stop this, but I can’t.

Before y/n can fire back though more and more comments from all the girls pore out. And the more: “you gonna kill yourself?” “you gonna cut yourself?” remarks they make the more humiliated y/n looks.

By the end of their relentless comments and bullying y/n is crying sobbing. And as someone with anxiety I can see the inevitable anxiety attack, in the way her entire body shakes.

With a strong “fuck you all” to her former friends y/n turns in her heels and leaves.

The cafeteria is quiet for a moment before the room breaks out in conversation, everyone gossiping about the scene they just witnessed. Debating how much of what was said was true.

I feel sick to my stomach knowing I had watched a girl just get torn down by her own, so called friends, like that, and didn’t do anything.

I mumble an excuse to my friends leaving the table. They don’t even seem to care emerged in their own conversations about the ‘gossip’.

I speed walk out of the cafeteria to find y/n.

There are only two places I can think of her being at. The girls bathroom, wich is probably not the case since she looked like she wanted to get as far away as possible,

Or her car.

She’d parked next to my van today. So I run out of the school to my car, to see hers still parked next to mine. I glance into it and she’s not in the drivers seat.

I get closer, catching my breath. I look through the window of the backseat seeing her sitting there curled up in on herself.

I knock on the car window catching her attention. Y/n’s beautiful teary eyes meet mine through the tinted glass.

She presses on a button on her car keys, the car unlocking.

Immediately I open the car door and slide in. My gaze soft as I look at the hyperventilating girl in front of me.

I close the door behind me. I gently take the car keys out of her hands. She was clinging to it like her life depended on it. I lock the car again and then lean to the front of the car and toss her keys on the drivers seat.

I turn back to y/n, she had her legs up to her chest hugging them while she continues to sob.

“Matt” she breaths out my name so tenderly.

We weren’t friends. But we shared one class in which we partnered up sometimes.

“Sh, you’re okay y/n” I breathe out. In an instant, my arms wrap around her smaller frame pulling her into me. I hug her from the side, her sobs wracking her body.

“No, no it’s not okay.” She lets out an irritated sigh, her breath hitching as a sobs Tores through her body again. “I just lost all my friends.”

I purse my lips holding her head. I cradle her into my chest. She didn’t deserve to have her stuff aired out like that, but all she was worried about was loosing her fake ass friends?

“Oh baby.” I sigh out. The nickname slips through my lips so effortlessly I didn’t even notice.

I keep her head cradled into my chest while I feel tears start to form in my own eyes.

“They ruined it.” She chokes out again, her voice shaky.

I breathe in heavily. “They ruined what?” I ask gently.

“My reputation”

I pause. My lips quiver at the sound of her cries. I try to blink away my own tears.

“That’s all you care about?” The words leave my lips before they register. I know she cares about all the things others say to her. She just seems like the type to.

“Matt, I spend so much time,” she sobs through the few words she said. Pausing to cry some more at the thought of it. “So, so much time, perfecting myself.”

I hear her pause again, and by this point I can’t hold back my own tears. I let out a soft sob crying with her as I hold her even closer to myself.

“I didn’t want anyone to know. It’s none of their business” her words are soft. But the more she talks the more quiet she gets.

In a way she was like me. Masking her sorrow like that. She always just seemed too perfect to be true.

Perfect hair, perfect makeup, perfect face. Great humor, nice, kind, popular.

But nobody ever questioned it. She had everyone fooled. She was a great liar. And even though I had my suspicions she never gave me a reason to believe I was right.

I just thought I was delusional for reading into things.

But I was right.

As much as I wish I wasn’t.

“I’m so sorry.” I whisper. I try to breathe hard as to not sob like she was. I wanted to comfort her not cry with her.

She pulls away slightly. I look at her. She still has tears running down her cheeks, not looking like it’d stop soon. She looks up at me through her tear stained lashes, her mascara only slightly smudged.

Her lips quivers as I see another wave of sadness wash over her. “Why are you crying?” She asks her voice shaky. She lets out another choked sob.

Her hands cup my cheeks as we both cry looking at the other. “Please don’t cry,” the sight of my tears only seems to make her more sad.

But seeing the way she looked crying, I only wanted to cry harder.

She still looked perfect. Though her makeup was smudged slightly, her hair messy, her perfect features stained with her tears.

I gently grab her wrists slowly pulling her hands off of my face. I pull up the sleeve of her longs sleeved shirt and flip her arm to look at her wrist.

My gut clenches at the sight of the tiny white healed marks. They were barely noticeable anymore.

I had noticed them before when we had partnered up for some project. But out of respect I didn’t say anything. Besides they weren’t that bad, thin, white stripes messily across her wrist.

For all I knew it could’ve been her cat. I don’t have a cat, and neither have I seen self harm cuts before, so I wouldn’t know the difference.

I purse my lips. I let my head fall forward slightly my eyes closed. I feel sick to my stomach knowing someone as perfect as y/n was, or had been cutting herself at some point.

I hear a choked sob fall from her lips. I feel her intense stare burn through my scalp.

I pick up my head again, my eyes immediately looking to hers. She was crying again. Making me also shed a few tears again.

I bring her wrist up to my face leaving a gentle peck on it.

She watches me. The sight only making her cry more. She closes her eyes briefly.

It wasn’t like she’d expected me out of all people to shame her for her scars. But she also hadn’t expected him to just kiss them.

“You didn’t deserve that sweetheart.” I whisper under my breath. I pull her back in leaving a firm kiss on her forehead before cradling her head back into my chest.

She breaks out into sobs again her arms going under mine and hugging me tightly.

She was clinging to me tightly, her sobs wrecking her body, and also making me cry.

I gently pat down her hair,as she keeps crying, trying to soothe both of us.

“Y/n.” She pulls back slightly, her arm still wrapped around me. “Do you still..” I trail off not wanting to say it. Because if I say it, it’ll be too true.

Her lip quivers as I see her glossy eyes shed tears again. She lets out a gut wrenching sob again pressing her face into my chest again, mumbling “I’m sorry”s over and over again.

I sigh sympathetically, rubbing her scalp. I knew from experience, that after crying so much, your head would hurt so bad. And even though she was still crying I wanted to soothe her.

“Honey.” I say gently pulling her away from me. Our eyes meet briefly before she looks down in shame. I gently grab her cheek again making her look back up at me.

“Where do you cut?” I ask softly. I grimace at the words leaving my lips. I calmed down not crying anymore, but my eyes staying glassy.

Her eyebrows are scrunched together as she slightly pouts. Her eyes were still glassy, threatening to break out in sobs again.

“I don’t do it often..” she whispers under her breath, trying to over herself. Her eyes close briefly shame written all other her face.

“Where.” My tone is still low, but more firm, demanding an answer.

“My thigh.” She lets one of her Chanda fall from around me resting her hand on her very upper right thigh.

My eyes soften even further. My tears had dried in my face by now, but I felt just about ready to cry again.

I shift slightly. Her hand that had still been around me going to the bottom of my shirt and keeping a firm grip on the fabric.

I put my hand on her waist my touch featherlight, not wanting to overstep. “Is this okay?”

She purses her lips. Her eyes stay locked on mine as she tries to read what I’m trying to do. But she ultimately nods.

I put both my hands on her waist and pick her up from next to me putting her on my lap. She lets out a shaky breath her eyes going wide.

“Is this okay?” I enquirer my tone staying low.

Her bottom lip wobbles again. She closes her eyes briefly. “I don’t wanna go anything.” She breaths out her voice small and almost afraid.

My own eyes widen for a second looking back at her. I just realized how bad this looked without context. But I’m not a dick. I want to comfort her, not get in her pants.

I take my hands from her waist putting them on my thighs. Yet she doesn’t make a move off of me. Her hand stayed bunched up on my shirt.

“God, I don’t mean it like that.” I breathe out. “Just, me comforting you would be easier like this?” I says slowly.

Her gaze goes up to meet mine again, her lip quivering holding herself back from crying again.

She leans forward resting her face on my collarbone. She puts her other hand on my chest too as she starts to sob again. my right hand goes to her back rubbing it gently. While my left hand goes to her thigh massaging where her scars presumably were.

Her crying makes me tear up again. So we just cry together. My hand rubbing soothing motions into her back, and my other hand finally going up to cradle her head into me further.

I whisper encouraging words. Until eventually her cries die down, and so do mine.

She pulls back slightly, her eyes red rimmed and puffy. The tip of her nose and her cheeks red. And her lips as puffy as her eyes. She is a pretty crier, but the sight still makes me feel remorseful.

I put my hand back on her right thigh gently rubbing circles on it. My other hand going to cup her cheek. She leans into my touch relaxing more. She looked more tired than anything now.

“You can always talk to me, you know that.” I breath out, finally feeling like the lump in my throat was gone.

Her hand cups my wrist keeping my hand in her face. I start to rub her cheek gently looking at her pretty face.

“You can stay with me, Nick and Chris. Alright?” She nods slightly in answer.

I move my hand from her cheek to her hair rubbing at her scalp slightly. “You want me to take you home pretty girl?” I ask softly.

After all we were still in the school parking lot.

“Please.”

Masterlist

A/N: I actually cried writing this. the first part was actually literally me. and i also used to cry a lot, and cut, so this just made me cry while writing, bcs i relate to it so much. i love you all, stay safe & clean <3

‼️please don’t copy my work/idea‼️

Taglist: @muwapsturniolo , @sturnad , @iluvm4ttsturni0l0 , @evie-sturns , @me09love , @fratbrochrisgf , @spideylovin , @chrissgirlsstuff , @stunza , @whicked-hazlatwhore , @sturniooolos , @ecliphttlunar , @orangeypepsi , @klaus223492 , @char112244 , @sst7niolo , @slut4chriss , @mattsturniololoverr , @th3-3d3n-g4rd3n , @st7rnioioss , @t1llysblogs , @nonat-111 , @blahbel668 , @rockstarchr1s , @sturnsintrouble , @nayveetbhh

[theladybrownstarot]

Pick-A-Card : What kind of changes do you need to make in-order to live the life you want ?

✧ Here's my masterlist for more !

✧ Make sure you like/follow/Comment/reblogg for more pacs like these !

Pile 1. Pile 2. Pile 3.

✧ Pile 1 .

Namaste pile 1 ! Let's get with your reading :-

𐙚 You need to love yourself more to bring out your feminine side to make change the way you see your life or we say perception . There's a need to let yourself come in a flow and go in a flow without being more of that rigid minded person . You need to remove mental limitations .

𐙚 You need emotional balance , I sense . An emotional balance that can be only created by making your own boundaries and principles for yourself with all the spheres in your life accordingly . Try to let yourself to feel the present or to feel yourself in present .

𐙚 You people really need to think less , feel more. You need to socialise and change your environment, so you can facilitate yourself with more opportunities that can help you bring yourself out truly , Stop thinking alot about everything .

𐙚 Stop fearing from negative experiences and start to move forward to things by taking lessons from the past and using it practically when things come again like that , remember life is about learning and nurturing .

𐙚 stop yourself from getting attached to materialistic view or goals because if you let yourself get attached to it you will loose the sight for living life and will fall into the prey of jealousy , envy and anger .

𐙚❀˖° Prominent zodiac signs and planets from the reading: Pisces, cancer ,scorpio , saggitaurus , jupiter , moon in gemini .

✧ Pile 2.

Namaste pile 2 ! Let's get with your reading :-

𐙚 same as pile 1 : You need to love yourself more to bring out your feminine side to make change the way you see your life or we say perception . There's a need to let yourself come in a flow and go in a flow without being more of that rigid minded person . You need to remove mental limitations .

𐙚 you have this very intuition inside you that you need to use , you have this clash of thoughts inside your mind when it comes to decision making regarding anything which leads you to confusion , to avoid this start listening to your feelings - if you feel like to study when you don't then go because what is you find something helpful .

𐙚 You have great potential to become psychics also that start understanding your dreams more - I hear bull and deer . You need to connect with your deepest self so you can heal , I sense that you need to follow what you always wanted but couldn't . Stop being defensive in general.

𐙚 Start to become more logical , practical and cautious where required. you have great potential but you haven't got the complete access because of certain things. Start to manifest I heard .

𐙚 Start loving your body and worship, some of you might fall into this trap of falling society and people , don't do it because you are different and you need to believe your light and shine .

𐙚❀˖° Prominent zodiac signs and placement:

Pisces, cancer ,scorpio, moon , libra , aquarius, 1st house and 5th house .

✧ Pile 3.

Namaste pile 3 ! Let's get with your reading :-

𐙚 You people need to understand the value of keeping your mind calm whenever faced with any tough situation rather than that of fighting deal it with in a calm way , in any situation just making yourself win shows ego and attachment to win by wrong defence.

𐙚 You need to believe yourself , also that remember we got all what we needed but how we use those differs which make things different . Use your wild side to make things work for you and flex your emotional muscles now more .

𐙚 Do you focus balancing yourself or do you focus more on balancing your external factors ? ask yourself . Time is precious, if you will keep thinking about other things which are of no importance then for you it will become difficult to maintain yourself .

𐙚 you need to be more patient with things , wait before you speak and think after this proceed . Be open and receptive to information. Gather facts so that you can make a decision that is in line with your integrity.

𐙚 Start to worship your deities more , start to take spiritual knowledge and apply them practically in in your life . Apply or get some tricks or methods to renovate certain things about yourself especially your impatience and feeling to fight always .

𐙚❀˖° Prominent zodiac and placements : libra , sun, leo , cancer, 1st house and 3rd house.

──⭒─⭑─⭒────⭒─⭑─⭒──

©️ @theladybrownstarot 2023 all rights reserved. Any stealing Or copying of work will be a punishable offence.

[wolfiesmoon]

Bakery

Leona x gn!reader

ok but can we feel the love tonight tho

i learned something new recently and i want to put this knowledge to good use (smirks evilly at leona)

also i am sick asf right now so i apologise if this is sloppily proofread

It seems like being Leona's pillow has become a part of your daily at this point. It's become an unspoken routine for you.

Usually, he'd sleep anywhere but he had to adapt his sleeping habits a little because of you. Turns out most people don't find the floor of the greenhouse a comfortable napping spot.

Usually, the perfect spot is your room in Ramshackle dorm. It's quiet and empty, save for the pesky ghosts that interrupt the two of you sometimes. It makes for the perfect hiding place when Ruggie is bothering him with some stupid papers he needs to solve for potionology, too.

All in all, worth the walk to the dorm. Especially since he gets to see you and feel your warmth without fail.

You were already waiting for him on your bed, busying yourself with scrolling through your Magicam feed. Usually, you keep a few textbooks for studying with you, but exams have mostly concluded for now. You know once Leona attaches onto you, you're not going to be able to leave for atleast 2 hours, so it's always great to prepare in advance.

Sure enough, you heard familiar footsteps getting closer and the door opened to reveal your sleepy lover. His tail swished when he caught sight of you. What a lovely sight, indeed.

"Hey Leona, had a good day?" you ask casually and he sighs in response, mumbling something about being tired. Well, that's just the usual, isn't it?

He climbs up on the bed and you smile at his sleepy expression. He's so cute when he's sleepy, but you probably shouldn't tell him that unless you want to get glared at.

Instead of crashing on top of you like you're used to, though, he places his hands on your belly, still sitting at your side. You raise an eyebrow at him, but he doesn't even meet your eyes.

Suddenly, his hands start moving in a kneading motion. A surprise massage? Not that you mind it, but that's highly unusual coming from Leona of all people. If anything, it should be the other way around.

"Leona..?" you question, trying to get a good look at his face. You can't really see it well because of the hair that fell to the side of his face. But from what little you can see, he seems to be in sort of a trance right now. His eyes are barely opened and he's wearing a little satisfied smile on his face. He doesn't respond to you at all.

"Leona?" you try again, a little firmer this time. He suddenly stops, probably finally coming back to his senses. You can see the way his eyes widen for a moment before he falls down on top of you without a word, wrapping his arms around you. Now you can't see his face at all, unable to read his expression.

"Leona, what was that?" you hugged him back, still a bit dumbfounded. You weren't going to lie though, that felt really nice.

"Don't ever bring this up again." Leona did not seem in the mood to discuss what just happened any further. He could have sworn he left that behaviour behind as a toddler. How embarrasing.

He's kind of worried now. That's how much you affect him.

"Oh... uh, okay." you pet the back of his head lovingly. Hmmm... now that you think of it, Grim does the same thing sometimes. The common denominator with Grim and Leona is that they're both cats, atleast somewhat.

If you apply this knowledge to what you know about cats in general... Oh, Leona, that silly goose. Seems he's a bit embarrased about kneading on you. You wonder if it was pure instinct.

yep, turns out the big kitties knead too, ain't that just a testament to the tried and true saying "cat is cat"

[grimm-writings]

Hiiii, I would like some Dungeon Meshi headcanons please! Reader is the oldest human in the main group and they're really motherly towards them. Like they're always fretting over their well beings and acting like a doting parent. And if you want, could you also add that Chilchuck's kinda into that so he falls for them?

That's all thank you!

…ft! chilchuck x gn! reader, platonic touden party & reader

…tags! fluff, some crack, headcanon format, mild manga spoilers, reader is referred to as ‘mom’ once

…wc! 847

…notes! the way i nearly screeched in delight when i got this ask. chilfuckers i’m one of you let me in. you used they/them for the reader so i’m gonna assume this is a maternal gn reader! i hope it is for your liking ty for being my first request 🥺

Having a more wise, of age individual in the party is always a plus when you need some advice.

And when most people in the party are absolute lunatics.

You have your hands full trying to stop Laios acting recklessly in action, or doting on Marcille when her emotions get the best of her.  Goodness, even Senshi has your hair going grey from how he gets sometimes!

Laios just sort of… lets your doting happen.

He can get slightly grumbly if you get too mad at him.  Still, it’s not the worst thing a parental figure could do.  Go easy on him!

Marcille takes psychic damage upon learning your age.  She’s staring at you, at the age in your face, and taking the years into account.

It’s simply not computing.  You… You should be, like, a pre-teen or something!  Human ageing baffles her once again.

Still… she is incredibly receptive to you doting on her.  She’s more of a carer on instinct but she finds herself falling into you whenever her spoons are low.

Senshi just sort of hits you with the “why tho” when you try fretting.  It’s actually slightly frustrating.  Still, you can recognise his wisdom and take a step back.  He can take care of himself… most of the time.

Izutsumi… oh the dear girl.

You must have recognised the signs immediately.  Her lack of table manners, her reclusive nature… she’s so young.

The girlcat was a bit prickly to any doting at first.  You would probably remind her a bit too much of Maizuru for her liking.

With time, perhaps sometime after he run-in with her succubus, Izutsumi would be a bit more welcoming of how you treat her.  It’s… It makes her feel nice, or whatever.

She accidentally calls you Mom once.  She was mortified as Marcille squeals in delight and Laios laughs to himself.  You couldn’t even ask if she thinks of you as a mother figure before she’s already stomping away to hide in a corner somewhere.

Then there’s Chilchuck.  Oh, what to say about him.

You probably thought he was a young human at first too.  He’s taller than other half-foots after all.  Still, as soon as you even try to act maternal around him, he yells at you and tells you he isn’t a kid.

Keep your distance for a bit, and he’ll warm up to you again.

Watching you do your thing with the other party members will have him commenting that he has no idea how you can just keep up with everyone like this, and he’s the one with three kids here.

You just smile gently and reply that it helps you keep stability knowing everyone in the party is doing alright.  At that, Chilchuck will give you a glance, and internalise your words.

Upon Izutsumi’s arrival into the party, Chilchuck’s perspective on you begins to alter slightly.

Initially, he respected you a fair bit.  You were more like the two older co-workers constantly giving each other looks at the younger ones’ antics.

But he sees you with this child he also has to admit he’s grown attached to.  You really were a natural maternal figure to Izutsumi.  He watches you tend to her sometimes, a smile slowly curling on his lips.

Then he catches himself, and his blood runs cold.

…Ohhh, shit. 

Chilchuck is level headed most of the time, but when he’s panicking he can’t keep his cool to save his life.

Around you, he becomes more… frantic, in a way.  Lecturing others to give you a break, even if he can just have a small talk with you.  If asked what’s up he’d raise his voice defensively and say it doesn’t matter.

One time, Izutsumi decided she can’t choose between her two favourite human heaters, and practically forced you and Chilchuck to sleep on either side of her.  Even with the girl slotted in between you two, Chilchuck was internally losing his mind at the closeness.

He even lets you dote on him a bit more again.  Not too much, though.  He’ll accept the occasional checking in and headpat but that’s it!

You can very easily pick up on his feelings for you.  It’s not hard to notice the shift in his attitude.

Well… It’s not like you can complain.  You may offer to help him out with his future shop once you’re out of here, giving him a slight wink.

Cherish how red his face gets.  He won’t let anyone else embarrass him so easily.  Maybe pinch his cheeks if you’re feeling brave, but he may swat you away depending on his mood.

At the end of the day, he’ll give you a small smile, and wonder aloud where the Hell all the party would be if it weren’t for you.

(Bonus!  I think Falin would also super appreciate your presence.  She’s the kind to simply take her own parents’ treatment of her and shrug it off in a ‘it is what it is’ sort of way.  Your doting attitude would leave her slightly discombobulated, but she’s very welcome to it.)

[imbored1201]

Hello, can you do a Lionesses x Teen Reader? where the reader's having a crush on a girl but the Lionesses are not having it. Not in a homophobic way, but just them not liking that you have a crush in general. They tried everything to make your crush go away 'cause for them, reader is too little and too cute for something like that.

The Text Message

A/N: I don’t know why, but I struggle so much with coming up with a title for the fics😭

Lioness x Teen Reader (Reader also plays for Barca)

Word Count: 1,094

You could feel their stares, but continued to ignore them. You were sitting far away from the rest of the girls. Texting your crush, well, trying to get the balls to send the 'I like you' text. 

Usually you would sit next to Mary and throw food at everyone, but now you were quiet, in your own little corner, attached to your phone. 

You had been doing that for the past two days.

You met your crush after a game with Barcelona; you saw her regularly since she went to lots of them. She was always sitting first row behind the goal on the left side of the field, so it was easy to find her, and you found yourself staring at her a lot during pregame warmups. 

You would always have a little chat with her while you signed stuff for the fans around her. It wasn't until a huge win where you scored a hat trick that you gained the confidence to ask her for her number, and she gladly gave it to you. 

Then came the texting none stop; you even went to the movies a couple of times together. You didn't know if she felt the same though; you didn't even know if she liked girls. 

This is why you were sitting here staring at your phone, deciding whether to send it or not. It wasn't until Tooney and Alessia decided to sneak up on you to see what was dragging you away from the rest of the team. 

They made themselves known when Tooney snatched your phone away and read what was on the screen. "hey!" You yelled as you tried getting it back, but Alessia held you back.

"You have a crush?!" Tooney yelled in shock. She swore just yesterday you were ranting about how dating was disgusting. 

"Lucy! Your kid has a crush." Lucy looked confused, but walked over and looked at the phone. "Who is this?" She questioned you, "someone." Millie took the phone now. 

"Girls, just leave her be," Beth tried to defend you. "It's normal for a girl her age to have a crush on someone," LJ added. At least they understood. 

"Who is this?" Lucy asked again, "A girl, Lucy, possibly my future girlfriend. Probably not; I don't even know if she fucking likes girls!" You ranted, "Language, jeez, you see what you're teaching her, Mary." Mary looked offended at Lucy's comment. 

"Stop it! Leave her alone." Keira took back your phone and handed it to you. "How much money do you want?" You looked at Millie, who had a serious look on her face. 

"What?" "I'll give you whatever you want if you forget about this crush of yours." Keira laughed in disbelief. "Millie, you cannot be serious. It's just a crush!" Millie shook her head. 

"She's too young for that!" Rachel joined in. You were starting to get overwhelmed, considering everyone was gathered around. 

"You didn't care when I told you about my crush on that character," you told Lucy as you crossed your arms.

"Because there's no chance in hell you would be able to date her, you actually have a chance with this random girl." While Lucy was ranting, you continued to stare at the text. 

"I'm sending it." Before you could, you got tackled by two different people, Millie and Rachel. "No! You're too innocent to start dating. She can hurt you," you groaned as Mary took your phone. 

You glared at Tooney and Lessi and said, "You two started this; you need to learn how to mind your own business." They both looked offended and shocked by what you said. Chloe and Georgia bursted out laughing as they took your phone to scroll through the other messages. 

"So, you've been to the movies with her," Georgia whistled. "What! When?" Lucy looked betrayed that you didn't tell her. 

"Like two weeks ago," you shrugged, "and you didn't tell me?" "Look at how you're reacting right now; this is the reason why," you told her as you huffed and stormed out of the room. 

Lucy groaned as she watched and turned to Keira, who was giving her a look of disappointment. "What? She's too young to date Keira."

"Oh please, everyone in this room had their first girlfriend or boyfriend when they were like 14, Lucy. She's 16 and just trying to experience new things outside of football.”

Everyone went silent. "We don't want her getting hurt," Rachel told her. "She'll be fine; trust me, Lucy will interrogate that girl to make sure her intentions are good." Lucy smirked and proudly nodded. 

"Now go apologize to the kid," they all groaned and left to find you. 

—————

You rolled your eyes as you heard a knock on your door. "What?" You said harshly. "Kiddo, can we talk to you?" Mary asked, "No." You stubbornly said, "Come on, open the door; we have your favorite candy." You perked up at that. "Fine," you said, opening the door, and Millie was quick to barge in. 

"Hey! Where's the candy?" "We'll get it for you later." Rachel held out her pinky, and you gladly took it. 

"We're sorry," Millie started as she elbowed Lucy. "Yeah, sorry," Rachel and Mary nodded. "And we'll support the relationship," Mary added on.

"But if she does something, we can hire teenagers to take care of her for you. We would, but we're assuming she's underage," Rachel said, but she saw the little smirk on your face. 

"She's your age though, right? I know your into older women." You blushed at that and nodded. "She's 17." "17?!" Mary shouted, "Mary, I turn 17 in like a month, and she just turned 17 a week ago." Mary let out a sigh of relief at that. 

"But you have to tell Alexia, and I don't want you going to her house alone," she warned you, and you rolled your eyes but nodded. "And I need to meet her." "You know we're not dating, right? I don't even know if she swings that way." 

Millie pinched your cheeks. "Who wouldn't want to be with your adorable face?" she cooed, and you smacked her hands away.

“You’ll be fine; I’m sure she likes you.” For the first time, Lucy was right. She did end up liking you, and now you were taking her out on a date. 

Of course Lucy was there to see how she was, and she ended up liking her a bit, but not fully since, according to her, ‘it’s too early to tell how she truly is’. 

[heytherelysia]

hello, i really enjoyed your work so far & i saw that your reqs are open! i was wondering if you could do ayato aishi x gn reader who is anxious and dependent? reader is almost like a sheep, following the crowd and attaching themself to their friends. thank you and i hope you have a lovely day/night 🤍

ayato aishi x anxious + dependent reader

you guys don't know how happy i get when i see requests 😭 good crumbs anon! as much as i like an independent reader who knows how to stand up for themselves, there's a special spark in a reader who is very reliant on others and in any way fragile. you guys have a lovely day too!

gn reader, not proofread, alludes to kidnapping, pretty tame for the most part.

you never shared a glanced at each other, not even once, but he was hooked on you when you accidentally spilled your drink on one of the delinquents.

"oh no... i'm sorry i'm sorry! i- ...please forgive me."

it was distressing. you didn't mean to be such a klutz, especially in front of a crowd of people, and now you got into such a mess with one of the delinquents.

the way he looks at you with annoyance, not even bothering to say a word. you know he's mad, rightfully so.

"i'm sorry... i'll buy you another uniform if you want..."

"don't bother. how do i know you won't dirty the uniform when you can't even hold your drink correctly and look where ya going? now move outta the way."

your friends help you stand up as the delinquents pass you by. by the time you look up, you no longer see the crowd of eyes that was practically shooting daggers at you. they continue their mindless conversations before your accident. although embarrassing yourself made a stain in your reputation, it's refreshing that an ocean of eyes is no longer staring right through you. you'll worry about the gossips regarding your clumsiness later.

much to your dismay, gray eyes were observing you the entire time. there was no spark in their eyes since the moment of their birth, they had no soul, they had no purpose, but to be a functioning citizen, when they are just flesh and meat without a sense of mind.

but you helped them. you helped them gain the spark in their eyes, you helped them become their own person, and you helped them find their purpose in life. you've done it all without ever acknowledging them.

ayato snaps out of it when your friends start to escort you away from the scene, rubbing your back and shoulders.

the apologies emitted from your mouth, your hands you were playing with in pure anxiety, your shivering body. he wants it all, he wants all that you can ever give him.

your sheepish personality does not benefit you, but it gives all the pros to ayato. he loved it when your breathing went stiff when he went up to you to say hi.

you've always needed company. wherever there is a crowd, you'll squeeze yourself in, just as long as they don't look at you like you have murdered a family of seven.

but ayato was an unusual company.

at first, it seems like he was just walking past the hall until his feet stops by the bench you're sitting on.

ayato aishi, he is commonly praised for his mother's victory in court when she was accused of murder and the disappearance of five girls. even so, he is still an average student, he hasn't done anything extravagant himself, unless we're talking about his effort to learn everything about you.

"hi."

he's... straight to the point. you try to at least look at him, but you are quick to look away when you see that his face is barely an inch away from you.

"...oh! uh... hi!" you're looking at everything but his face, he just won't stop staring.

he loves it when you're anxious, trembling, jittery and all. but he wishes that you could look at him again more thoroughly, like he is an art piece at a museum.

the next thing you know, he is walking away as he looks at you with half-lidded eyes and a smirk. oddly enough, you maintain eye contact with him until he eventually disappears down the hall.

he never talked to you again after the interaction but something always feels like it's watching you.

one thing that he does not like about you is that you surround yourself with familiar faces and rely on your closest companions. it makes it difficult for him to stalk you without alarming anyone. and with the other, it's rather a jealousy thing of his. one day, when he gets you all to himself, you will depend your very existence to him. rest assured, he'll take care of you, cook you delicious food, and shower you with praise. none of your friends are able to give you what he can, he is special, as he likes to think.

(bonus!) "ayato's darling shrine"

portrait — a photo of my darling watching the sunset. they look a thousand times more beautiful.

broken earphones — my darling threw this away on their way home. i wish we can listen to music together with these headphones.

gel pen — darling's favorite pen. they were upset when they lost it, i almost wanted to give it back to them.

crumpled paper — scrapped essay for their research. they forgot to throw it in the trash out of stress. their handwriting is cute, should i write them letters one day?

...

i loved writing this °՞(ᗒᗣᗕ)՞°

[twilightarc-gm]

Why do you like jiang cheng?

At the risk of liking him for the wrong reasons, let me be verbose and annoying about it.

A short anecdote: I finished the donghua before the novel and I liked JC's aesthetic so I was happy to have that imagery in my head for the novel, but mostly I came out of the donghua like "cool story, the ending was frowny face though" and I came out of the novel like I was lost in the IKEA store "there's stuff here but it's not what I want and it's organized in a way that's hard to navigate through." Bit like giving me a puzzle to solve.

Anyway, imagine a cat bapping at a thing trying to get fandom to show me what to do with MDZS (i.e. reading fanfic) and then I come across anti-Jiang Cheng stuff.

//record scratch

I'm sorry what?

Why?

NO.

I started then on Shuangjie reconciliation fic and quickly evolved into Jiang Cheng "Apologist" ((I actually don't think he has anything to apologize for even if he would do so anyway.))

I've been in the xianxia/wuxia sphere of media consumption for a year or so before trying out MDZS and JC just fits so well as the main character of his own story; destined for a position of power through birth, friends with someone in his life that causes conflict, seemingly betrayed by said friend when needing that friend the most, losing and losing and losing as his trust in said friend proves unfounded because the friend walks a path he can't follow, and then he's left with the tragedy that befell the world because--ultimately he trusted this friend too much.

It's a classic story of love and attachment and how good intentions can have massive consequences. Two men entwined by fate and in the end there's a battle on a hill (off screen in this case) where one is forced to "kill" the other.

MDZS could have ended with the past timeline, and I would have liked it more but at least in the present timeline we get Jiujiu and a-Ling.

Anyway: Excerpts and Commentary Below about WHY I LOVE JIANG CHENG, courtesy WANYIN

Of all the clans to offend, you don’t offend the Jiang Clan, and of all the people to offend, you never offend Jiang Cheng.

We stand by a badass mf in this house. The first thing we learn is that he gets credit for killing a big baddy and the second thing we learn is how fierce the rest of his reputation is. He brooks no shit and leaves no quarter. Amazing 💜

Well, I was done for at "gaze like two streaks of cold lightning" so RIP me, I guess. Reminds me of some antis that are like "you only like him because he's hot" which isn't true but it is a nice plus. He's described as inferior to LWJ so like, if it was only about hotness then wouldn't I like LWJ???

“I am his uncle. Do you have any last words?”

At the sound of that voice, every drop of blood in Wei Wuxian’s body seemed to surge to his head but then immediately drained away again. Thankfully, his face was already a mess of ghastly white, so it didn’t look strange when he went a little paler.

A man in purple attire strode over. He was dressed in a narrow-sleeved light robe, with his hand resting on the hilt of his sword. A silver bell dangled from his waist, yet there was no sound when he walked.

This young man had fine brows and almond eyes, with a chiseled handsomeness to his features. His eyes were deep and intense with a hint of aggression, his gaze like two streaks of cold lightning. He stopped and stood three meters away from Wei Wuxian. His expression was like that of a nocked arrow on a bow, ready to shoot, and even his composure was suffused with arrogant pride.

Jiang Cheng ruled the Jiang Clan of Yunmeng alone, so it could have been said that he was in a state of isolation.

🥺 Alone?? And he could still afford 400 Immortal Binding Nets? Self-sufficient king 🤩 And like, his reputation is so fierce and he's boiling over with anger in that scene, but still he restrains himself because he did the cost-benefit analysis! And then later he takes a huge risk on WWX, like he always does for WWX, and that doesn't work out for him--like it always does.

Seeing that nothing had happened to Jin Ling, Jiang Cheng was greatly relieved. However, that relief soon turned into a furious reprimand:

Parent behavior. Enough said.

He has a twisted smile when encountering a trigger for his PTSD and then he decides to fight it instead of letting it paralyze him. He's such a doer. Like, every other moment of the day he's carefully calculating pluses and minuses to every choice (valid) but when it comes to facing his personal demons he's ready to throw down. Excellent.

A moment later, Jiang Cheng’s lips pulled into a twisted smile. His left hand subconsciously began stroking that ring once more.

He said softly, “Excellent. Back, are you?”

He let go of his left hand, and a long whip dangled from it.

“Oh? Then please enlighten me, what is your type?”

Walking A-Spec flag very concerned about what the man who might be his shixiong thinks about him, more at eleven!

Wei Wuxian waved him off and then hooked his arm around Jiang Cheng’s shoulders. “Who cares? I’ll tease him a bit more before I go. You’ve already collected my corpse so many times. Once more won’t hurt.”

Okay but big lol that JC doesn't get to collect WWX's corpse that final time. //sounds of sobbing

A smile appeared on his face, but then he immediately humphed.

He's so grumpy and adorable! I love him! pre massacre JC is precious and I just want him to have someone to bring out that smile again.

He literally didn't have to do this. He makes all these excuses how he'll be embarrassed if WWX is rolling around 😂 Perfection. Boy, you are still carrying him and he doesn't want you to stop.

Jiang Cheng, walk slower, you’re gonna throw me off.”

Not only did Jiang Cheng want to throw Wei Wuxian off, but he practically wanted to bash his head into the ground to create a human crater. “So fussy even though I’m carrying you!”

“I didn’t tell you to carry me,” Wei Wuxian reasoned.

Jiang Cheng flew into a rage. “If I didn’t carry you, I think you’d hang out at their ancestral hall all day, rolling around on the floor. I can’t afford this embarrassment! Lan Wangji took fifty more strikes than you, but he walked away on his own, and you’re not embarrassed, pretending to be an invalid? I don’t want to carry you anymore. Get the hell off!”

“No, I’m wounded,” Wei Wuxian said.

Alrighty, like I'm just going through the entire book at this point.

Let me see if I can make this more concise:

Sacrifices himself despite his very dutiful nature that would oppose this. He throws away all his responsibilities for WWX, again and again, carrying on a tradition of favoring WWX over his own health and happiness. Citing: JFM favoring WWX to the detriment of his marriage, JYL dying to save WWX, and JC (exhausted and with little or no power) running into danger to save WWX ala distracting the Wen patrol and 2nd Siege.

Can't be honest in his affections and makes up excuses to do nice things for others.

Loves and understands his sister. She wanted JZX so he made it happen when LLJ had absolutely no reason to reinstate the marriage contract between Xuanli. JGS notes in the CR arc that he didn't want the marriage for his son in the first place and that there were better options than YMJ, and that was before the war! JC helped her get to Yiling to show off her wedding dress! Even though she married out he still felt so attached to her son he couldn't not co-parent Jin Ling.

Yes, he has Zidian, but he also has a second horsewhip that he keeps on him which is very exciting to know.

The narrative hates him but he survives. (He survives because the narrative hates him).

Most BAMF entrance in the novel at the temple scene with the busting the temple doors down and coming in from the rain with an umbrella. Like sure the narrative hates him but small blessings that rule of cool still counts for something.

Mama's boy.

Just some dude, shows up late to treasury room nonsense, knows all the gossip, no one has faith in him including himself, but he keeps going and doing what needs to be done even when he's so so tired and his shixiong shows up 3 months late with a ghoul lady and a latte, or disappears to liberate slave property without warning first and now he's called into a midnight meeting after trying to get some much needed rest and now he's got consequences to deal with. Someone help him!

An expert at sneering. Threats as a show of worry and care. This makes all the little and brief smiles so much more endearing.

Sandu Shengshou is an amazing title, get out of here if you don't agree. Holy Hand of the Three Poisons? Brutal, perfect 💜 It gets used like, ONCE. Crime against me personally.

Link to Blorbo Sheet for JC

He loves, he hates, he wants to hate he's not allowed to love. Zero middle ground, he's all in and there's no way out.

//is shot and dragged off stage

But just as the Wei Wuxian of the past who’d extracted his golden core for Jiang Cheng had been unable to tell him the truth, the Jiang Cheng of the present could no longer bring himself to speak up.

[natsglorifiedsimp]

Occupied

a bit of angst today cause why not?😝 oh gosh why is my writing so bad now lol i think this would be a last one lollll

This was a request of @aosquakewidow23

Taglist: @diaryoflife @xxromanoffxx @lissaaaa145 @fxckmiup @mmmmokdok @sayah13 @karmasgxrl @meurgen @simp-erformarvelwomen @lilaswidowspark @snowdrop1026 @beholdagaywriter

(I'm not the owner of this fanart. Ctto)

"I need someone to talk to," you said sheepishly to both of your girlfriends. You tried your best to still maintain a smile even though you wanted to cry your heart out.

They know you are shy and not the best at communicating. They know how much courage it took you to say that you're hurting inside. But this time they ignored it.

"Y/n, I'm sorry but not right now. We still have finishing up to do." Natasha said.

A plea for help turned into an embarrassment. "What were you thinking?" you scold yourself.

You slowly backed away from them to give them much-needed space. "I'm sorry" you frowned. "I can come back later when you aren't busy." you tried to show a smile but your lips failed you.

"Yeah, yeah" Wanda flicked her hand ushering you out.

You wept in the hallway trying desperately to keep it together. "Maybe they're just busy and this is nothing, I can get over it myself" you convinced yourself.

---

Hoping they would listen to you, they didn't. It has been a week since they last told you to get off their faces. But it was one of those days again. You've been bottling up everything but you're already so exhausted.

"Nat? Wands?" you sounded so small, your eyes filled with tears you can't hold back anymore. "I could really use a hug right now."

Roaming your eyes in the room you noticed an unpacked suit of case. "What?"

You hurriedly looked at your closet, "Some of the clothes are gone" you thought.

Just in time Natasha and Wanda both came out of the bathroom. "Are you guys gonna leave?" you brittle.

"Oh yeah, new mission," Natasha said casually like it's nothing. Your eyes burned as you tried to keep your tears at bay. "But we haven't h-hang out yet." you stuttered.

"It's fine, we can do that when we get back" Wanda was occupied with her necessities. She didn't even spare a glance at you.

"Uhm, okay." you frowned in disappointment.

---

During the nights, you were up. Trying to keep your feelings in a jar keeping them away from people who are trying to help. You felt like a responsibility attached to your girlfriend's tail.

Someone who is trying to belong to a circle where she didn't fit in. You kept your distance to the team making sure you talked enough but not too much. Talked about them but little about you.

A daily stroll became your daily routine. During the day or night, you'd make sure you had your peace. But today, it wasn't the usual calm day. A guy dressed in a skimpy outfit is trying to snatch the poor young woman's purse.

Combat was something you never learned. Even from your girlfriends. But seeing the situation you didn't even think twice.

You grabbed the man's arm and kicked his crotch. He winced in agony keeping his balls together. You grinned braggingly and brought back the purse to the lady.

In utter anger, the man kicked your back with full force causing you to bumped the floor. 'That hurt' you thought.

He didn't stop there he made sure to give you blows by blow. You didn't fight though, you didn't care. At one point you even wished this would cause your death.

---

Getting home bruised and broken worried the team. Each one trying to talk to you, to give you immediate care. But with a simple "I'm fine" they stopped.

You walked past them like nothing happened. As if you didn't look like a mess. Natasha and Wanda were still weren't there though. As always.

---

The two redheads got back home exhausted. Shoulders slumped, eyes heavy with almost a week of deprived sleep.

FRIDAY notified you of their arrival but ashamed of what they're gonna say you kept it a secret. You hid in your room and sobbed until sleep took over.

You tried to keep yourself anonymous. Going into a room where the redheads are wasn't much hard. You were invisible to them.

This went on for days and you assumed that it was over. They no longer love you. They no longer care for you. You were once again alone in a room full of people you know but never belong to.

The bruises were still there. If anything they were more purple and visible. The ache in your back worsens but you didn't care.

Wanda gasped, "What happened y/n?!"

Suddenly you were visible again everyone was looking at you. "I'm fine" you lied.

"If you're fine you sure as hell won't have bruises littered all over you" she scolded worryingly.

She tried to grab your hand but you moved away from her. "It's fine, Wanda. It's not like you guys would care." your lips trembled.

"How can we take care of you if you wouldn't tell us what's wrong?" Natasha said.

Your eyes snapped at her, "I did try, Natasha. But you're too busy enough to even care!" the hood that you've been hiding on for weeks fell from your head. Now they could see every bruise you took from that snatcher.

"Oh y/n," Wanda said. "Come on let's get you fixed up" she ushered.

"No. I'm fine." you snapped. "Go back to your perfect little bubble."

"Honey, our bubble isn't perfect if you're not in it." Natasha cooed.

"Then the perfect little bubble ended weeks ago."

You only matter when you're sick and bruised. But once everyone finds how irrelevant you are. They'll pick a new person that is more capable than you. Remember: you're not a lot of people's favorite person

[doublekanble]

heart

Alastor/reader (gnc)

romantic-platonic

word count: 5.5k

or, alastor is a man of many things, and you believed he can never love without hurting his love. tw: a small paragraph of al eating your heart.

1. “–I was right.”  you coughed, the more you do, the more your voice choked on itself. Your body seized and shuddered with every beat of your heart as blood spew from the wound, already giving up on getting yourself away when you can barely breathe. He wishes he could’ve made it easier for you, but he got caught up. “you really are selfish…”

As the hand he’s holding onto quickly grew cold, Alastor hoped, for all its worth, that when he fall, however long it’ll takes, you’ll find the strength to finally accept his love for you. For now, he set his left ear over your heart, his hair stained red, Alastor listened closely for what he thought was the last time, as you and your life stops entirely.

(having done this time and time again, for the first time in a long time, he felt a longing for warmth, your warmth, the one seeping from you and dissipating with the cold air in the night.)

2. If there is ever a need to described himself, then Alastor would be the first to say that he is a man of many thing.

The charming popular radio host of New Orleans, the life of the party, a bachelor second to none. He’s your friendly neighbor who greets you with a smile and a caring friend. He’s the perfect son and an amiable stranger. Everything you want, he will be. Everything, except all you ever wanted from him is someone to talk to.

You’ve always a strong fascination for writing from years gone by. From the gloomy and miserable words of a poor but astute poet, riddled with nihilism and pain, to a long-gone romanticist who wrote fairy tales and chasing love he couldn’t held in his hand, or a myth, lost to time and rewritten over and over again. All the books you ever care to curated in your home is that of the classic and the dead.

Perhaps that’s why he’d grown so attached to you and the poetry you sewn into existence with clumsy words.

With his unfortunate lot in life despite his mother’s best effort –god bless that woman, Alastor would, in time, learn how to play charade better than anyone else, barely remembering the last time he bother to show care to anyone else with love and honesty rather than bemusement. He doesn’t need moth-bitten books to guide him through conversation when he can just as easily play the role of a salesman, granting you the option to pick between a piece of stale bread or the last supper. But only a salesman in the end, his words and gestures is with all the saccharine and none of the sugar.

Although he could never hope to weaves paintings with his word, ever only a mockery of one, Alastor welcome his shortcoming in strides, as long as people bought into his act. For the love he lacks in his heart, valuable you, his treasured companion, would make up for it all.

In stark contrast to his hidden callousness, you were a much more genuine person. The books and stories you gathered throughout your short-lived life give you a means to convey the feelings that made up your whole existence. In the occasion where he manage to pick the right topic, you would choose to hastily penned out your thoughts, writings border-on obsessive as you speak of vivid strokes of emotions no single word in any language can ever hope to capture. And yet, your heart, enraptured by the scenery, frantically beat so loudly in your chest as you speak of worlds end and death departed with shared poison; it would also spoke of a love so ordinary and mundane.

You’d never mourned the Danish storyteller that chased love endlessly, simple deeming it a life worth living. He wondered if you ever regretted telling him that.

(you sing praises to the odds and the out of sort while cursing at the commonplace of life, Alastor charmed the ordinary and laugh at the macabre death brings. as long as you’re there by his side, he have no need to love anything else.)

 3. Just like everything else about you, your close proximity to Alastor is not the standard, and should always be seen as an exception.

That evening, you both got shooed away after a particularly early dinner, his mother’s only excuses was that you, the esteemed and beloved guest, already help with cooking, so it’s only natural you’ll get to spend the rest of the stay resting up. Even if the most you ever did was being so horrendous at chopping veggies, Alastor ended up taking over your load instead.

He laugh about it, saying that you’re pretending so you don’t have to do the work. His mother slapped him on the back of his head, while he nearly chop off his own fingers, she comforts you about your culinary skill. You smile at him when she turns her back on you both, knowing full well Alastor’s fighting his instinct to throw the first thing in his hand at you.

You two stand awkwardly on the porch and stare at the only available seat before Alastor argues that he did the most work so he should take the rocking chair. You point out how he’s practically whispering in the hope of his mother not noticing, he doesn’t bother to deny it.

After some mindless chatter, Alastor would suddenly joke about how if he were to ever read the same works as you, maybe he’ll be able to conceived a love so vicious and gentle too. You, sitting just by his feet, only gives him a sheepish smile. It wasn’t until before you’re at the front of his door, already bid his mother goodbye and ready to go back, that you would throw a remark at him.

“I think you’re a pretty vicious guy on your own,” you walk the three step down and continued through the front walk nonchalantly, hands in your coat pocket instead of linking with his like usual. “If you were to love someone, you’ll hurt them in the end. Even if you were to read all of my books.”

You stand at his gate. Although you’re waiting to see whether he’s going to go with you, you might as well have been gauging his reaction. Unconsciously, as he catches your gaze, he relaxed his grip and stride towards you like a panther to a sitting duck.

“You’re welcomed to, by the way. Just don’t dog-tag them.” Faint stinging shot through the heart of his hands from where his nails was digging into. His laugh sounds more like choking as he ignores your offer for now.

“Now, I wasn’t aware you have such a dreadful view of me, let alone thinking I can’t – what?” incredulously, Alastor barks “Love?! HAH!I supposed one of us are going to have to break that pathetic news to my mother.”

The moment he reach you, he catches a soft sigh falling from your lips, “It’s not that I think you can’t, Al.” the nickname that he imprinted on your frontal lobe sounded like nails on chalkboard, “It’s that I think you shouldn’t.”

“How delightful…”

You turned and began to walk on your own. If Alastor was anyone else, he would’ve taken this at face value and get offended at your eccentricity.

“And where, pray tell, does these impressions of yours come from?” He snatched your left arm, pulling it from its resting place and do the job himself. You give him a look, he smiles.

“I’ve been watching you.” His expression must’ve been something, enough for you to instantly stop on the sidewalk as you stammered and tries to pull your arm from him. “Not like that you deviant! I was just trying to get a read on you, since everyone kept talking about you being unattached and all.”

“Yes, yes, I know. What now, you want in on the chase? It’s ok dear, I know I’m utterly irresistible!” Refusing to let go of you, he only laugh on as you scowl. It’s well known to everyone that Alastor have been available for the longest time since anyone ever known him. It was also a well-kept mystery, the fact he have never courted a single person throughout his entire life.

“Utterly hogwash, that’s what you are.” Huffing to yourself, you finally would relent your arm to him. Your shared steps echoing across the darkening street, it’s near curfew. “I do have to say, I see what they meant, about you being a good spouse and all that,” He smiles a bit brighter at that, “But I just can’t see you being vulnerable with anyone else. You despises things not going your way, and love just have too much uncertainty!”

“Yes, yes,” he repeats, as if soothing you from a tantrum, “Weak and frail Alastor, the poor soot of New Orleans, unable to tear his ribcages open and show everyone his organs the same way his beloved whimsical friend here does every day ~.” You hiss as he settled his own weight against you with his head on your shoulder, nearly knocking the both onto the ground, “I guess you’ll just have to be with me for the rest of your life then! If you don’t, I’ll simply drown in my own piled up misery! What a life it’ll be!”

“Sure you will. Now get off and take me back home you dramatic coot.”

4. At that time, there was no need for Alastor to inquire your meaning of “vicious”.

In direct contrast to your trusting nature, you’re also perceptive and doubtful to a fault. The first slight of your tongue was a comment on how he can stop smiling around you. Always with that same gaze as you have now, lying underneath him. For the life of him, he couldn’t remember what he said to you that day. But it was enough for you to stood up and walked from the table with a ten-dollar bill pin under your half-finished lemon tea. The issue was quickly resolved with a phone call to your home, but he quickly learned that you don’t take kindly to – and quite frankly, refused to participate in – saccharine sweet insult.

But at what point did he stop hiding himself and let you read him freely, he thought. If he bit down on his tongue until he bleeds and shut you out like how he did to so many others who couldn’t even take one step near him, then maybe something could’ve turn out differently.

Replaying that moment over and over in his head, for the first time in his life, Alastor think about the concept of love, really think about it. It simply was an aspect of life that he never pay mind to, equating it with romance book and kissing under starry skies, and thus, utterly useless. When he think of love, all he have to go off of is his dear old mother, who sacrifices and suffers so much for him, which, in time, he pay her back with everything he have. His life was only about her and himself and the bodies under the forest floor and it was everything he wanted and more. Until one rainy day, with his eyes on the script he’s writing out for tomorrow’s broadcast, bleary-eyed and hearing the bed calling his name, he thought about you.

When he came to, he already dropped his coffee cup. The brown liquid burns, even through his slipper.

After that, Alastor would start picking out books from your carefully curated shelves, sitting in your armchair and skims through the lines while you spread across the ground like an old cat, he tried to find the feelings that you described to him in the same page you’d read a million times and over. But as he does so, he would soon find that there’s not a single word in any of those old and yellowed pages of yours that is able to captured the quickly spreading rot in his heart. In a frenzied, Alastor would burn through your small library faster than you could ever hope for.

(Alastor knows that time and time, again and again, as long as you’re willing to reach for his hand, he will never let go of yours.

at some point, he’d stop caring about whether you’re willing to at all. why would he, when the meaning of being able to love you became all he care to know at all.)

5.

“You don’t need to love like I do, you know that, right?”

He turns to you, on your stomach, lying in your nest of blankets and pillows with a pencil in hand putting down incomprehensible charcoal shape.

“Bragging now, are we?” he gets up from the armchair and settled down by your side, eyes watching your hand while propping the book he was reading in his lap. You crank your neck and stare at him with a look, “And how are you so sure I want to love like you, dear?”

“You’ve been plowing through my books.”

He sends you a beaming smile, acting innocent while playing with your hair.

“You offered.”

“Aren’t they all the one I told you about?”

Your eyes on the book he’s holding, then the one he just placed back into the shelves. It feels like he’s back in his mother’s kitchen, with his dirty nails behind his back and a poor excuse for the missing bread on the dinner table. Except this time, there’s just you and him in your small living room, and you’re looking awfully smug about it.

Raising his hand in the air, he sigh pitifully, “Ah~, guilty as charged, darling.” and offers nothing else. The silence afterward is enough of a white flag anyway.

Pleased with what you got from him, you turn back to your work, seemingly unaware (or even worse, maybe you don’t care at all) about the gnawing in his chest and the storm raging in his head while his hand weaves through your hair.

The last time you talked to him about love, you more-or-less called him and his love hazardous. While Alastor have no trouble with accepting it from anyone else, with you, it feels as if you’re discarding a part of him to the dogs. Although his knowledge on many topics far exceeds yours, when it came to pure and genuine emotions from the heart, you’d know enough to examine him under all type of love there is, and time after time you’d deemed him impossible to ever love. And despite knowing loving and love is wholly separate, it tears him open to even considers that you’d thought of him as unable to love and be loved and something about it is just so incredibly agonizing to the point of wanting to rip you open so you can see just how unlovable you are too.

But in your living room, sitting right next to you the way no one else is allowed to. He sigh, making sure his words doesn’t come off as unpleasant as he feels.

“If I don’t have to love like you, then how do you supposed I should be doing it?”

“I’m not sure, but hopefully not at all.” You said offhandedly, but you might as well just drove a knife through his stomach, but it’s you, so he let it be, “If you can’t help yourself though, you’ll probably do something really horrible.”

“What do you supposed I’ll do?”

You turn to him, a hint of surprise in your eyes at how close he is now, but you let him be, “Undecided. But you seems like the type to let it eats you alive.”

“I’ll let my love eats me?” Laughing in disbelief, he could almost call you cute with how you nodded to yourself, resolute in your idea about him.

“You’ll let it eats you, yes.”

Alastor chuckled to himself as he tap your sketchbook twice, you hand it to him.

“Well, I’ll need to make sure that I won’t be alone, aren’t I?”

You laugh openly and said that’s true, he’s too selfish to be taken alone. Alastor couldn’t care about how much of that was just more of your usual jest and how much of it is your view of who he is. If you, who love so selflessly and readily, agrees without push back, that someone as selfish as him will doomed whoever it is that he loves so much, then who is he to deny.

At that time, the line of charcoal you put onto the paper come together to show a shadow of a small man dragging a coat by his unseen feet, a mock-up from one of the stories that you loved. Alastor stop wondering if he ever could love something like the poems and stories you’ve read a million times over, instead, he think it’s best if he loves the way you expected him to, the way he can see himself doing.

6. To be loved is to be changed.

You told him this while he stand in your kitchen, trying to shoo you back to the table so he can work without fuzzing over you. And now, while he’s holding you, so cold and so unlike you, Alastor wondered whether you would like it if your bones were to be buried in the same spot as the others.

As much as he’d love to keep it near with him, there’s not a single excuse in the whole round earth that can ever help him convinced his mother of letting him uprooted the garden out back and buried you down there, neither can he bring you with him everywhere. Alastor wants to try taking you to the morgue after he’s done, but how do you explain bringing in a set of skeleton with missing ribs? It’s simple, really.

You don’t.

He lifted you up in his arms and sat back on his sofa, your lulling head settled just below his chin, wanted to savor what’s left of you for just a bit more before rigor mortis sets in and makes you even less of what you are now. The gramophone in the corner of his room spewed utter nonsense as Alastor closes his eyes.

It’s Tuesday tomorrow, but he will have to roll up his sleeves and get to work on cleaning out one of the guest room in his hunting lodge if he doesn’t want the ants to take you first. He’ll have to call in sick, too. Alastor likes to think that when he sees you again, you’ll at least have the will to appreciate the troubles he went through for you and not complaint about being locked up inside. You and the love you have for him, akin to small river, a gentle stream, with orange and yellow leaves floating across, tucked in a forest somewhere. It widdled down the rocks and carved a path for itself. The same one that you oh so heartlessly withheld from Alastor.

You'd appreciate being bury in such a scenery, it’s a shame you won’t be, though your body would’ve made way for the prettiest flowers. But you’ll have to take what he can afford to give. To be loved is to be changed, after all.

(when, not if. having gone on for this long, he’s sure that you’re suspended in between life and death in the hell you refuses to ever believe in. half of him prayed that there’s not a river there so you can drown yourself in it just to forget all about him. the other half prayed you’ll remember nothing at all, even of the literature you love so much.

at some point, where will you stop being yourself? when you forget enough of yourself? Alastor doesn’t need to care about the semantics. he knows he’ll choose you time and again, even if you forget how you love.)

7. You take your time reading through farewell letters.

Unless the cats and dogs on the street can write, then there’s only a few, you kept a significantly smaller number of friends by your side. But it must’ve been hard to even focus with Alastor sitting right next to you.

“Darling, surely we can-“

“Please don’t make this any harder than it already was, Alastor.”

Desperately holding onto your wrist and halted your pace for just a second, he all but plead a hopeless case.

“You’re not thinking straight! Are you really just going to up and leave because someone told you so? After living your whole life here?!”

Your hand, moving like clockwork, already finished with the letters, refusing to stay in his. You pulled back from him and place the rest of the letters in a small wooden box with a deer carved on its lid. “You know it’s not just that.”

In times like these, he wonders if it was himself who have gone mad. As if the whole world is in on one big joke and you are just following along with it. Any moment now, you’ll burst into laughter and tell him that everything is a lie. You’re not moving to Washington to help a friend you know for some years with their business, and you’re not leaving him, not after everything he showed you. But you’re holding onto the letter with his mother’s name written on the front with misty eyes as if you have no other choice. So he held you by the shoulders to the point digging his nails into it and turned you to look at him.

“Then what else is there?! For Christ sakes-“ you look as if this is the hardest thing you’ll ever have to do in your life, he felt as if this is the hardest battle he have to fight, “Please, mon Chéri, talk to me...”

Alastor collapse onto you, his whole weight pins you down on your small couch. Head on your chest, he listens as your heart beats just a bit faster. You let him.

“…what do you think we are, Alastor?”

Without hesitation, he reply.

“We are whatever you want us to be. Whatever it takes for you to stay.”

For someone like you, a romantic at heart, just like who he is now, that should’ve been enough for you to at least considers the possibility of forgetting about what’s right and wrong. For sure, it would’ve been enough for you to stay, if you were anyone else.

But you’re you, and he’s only himself. The romantic in you see through his act for the longest time and still fall in love with him, but just like how your love is selfless and kind, it’s also viciously rational. If you were anyone else, you would’ve ignored the rational part of yours.

“I’m sorry, Alastor.” All this time, he was desperately proving himself to you. Doing everything in his power just so you’re willing to forget your rationale and love him just as much as he loves you. “We’ll die loving each other.”

He doesn’t care if he die, Alastor wants to scream out. He’s ready to die to love you, he have been screaming out all this time. But despite all of his effort, you deemed him a love not worth chasing after till death, while he already planned the path to hell with you.

Your fingers, shaky and gentle, brush through his hair. If it was anyone else, he wouldn’t have to place himself bare and vulnerable like this. But if you were anyone else, he wouldn’t have love you at all. And if it’s death holding you back from loving him, then so be it.

8. For a long time now, Alastor knows you more than anyone else.

You were never a dancer, not by choice either. Its pathetic in the cutest way, how you froze up and refused to move, the way you stutters and try to pull from him only ever makes him want to bully you more. But from the way your brows draws together, to the way you’d tripped over yourself chasing after his footstep, all of it, Alastor earned from you.

From the way you stayed up overnight, to how the bottom of your shoes dragged against the pavement as you walk. From the tip of your pencil, to the bottom of your bookshelves. Every books on your shelves and every sketches. Alastor swear with all his life that no one else knows better than him when it came to you.

He knows intimately the curves you’d penned on your signatures; he knows how you’d change your mind at a moment notice about anything, he knows how you take with you small things on the side of the road that you deemed pretty enough and he knows you still have a lot you want to do here that you’ve told your lovely friend. So it’s only normal for Alastor, the person you grown to love so much, to know exactly why you refuses to even considers being by his side, and it’s just his luck that he also knows just how to write a letter with words just like yours.

So when was it that you got a friend you trusted so wholeheartedly, so faithfully, so much so, you’re your dearly cherished Alastor became a second thought in your mind? Weren’t you a romantic? Weren’t romantics idiots who can’t think straight when it come to love? So why was it that you alone refuses to let yourself love him and remained so loyal to someone you only considered a friend, someone who couldn’t even tell your lettering from his? Was it them? Who fed you lies after lies to captured you in their own hands? Was it them who taught you the telling and sign of a madman? Is that why your view of him was so horrible, you' refused to ever fathom life with him?

He knows you would’ve hated him for this, but Alastor adores you, and sometimes you just don’t know what’s best for you, even when it’s staring at you from across the front walk and following you to your home.

So if someone as rational as you can be swayed back to his lodge for just one more visit, then your friend surely can be swayed too, to come and visit you some other time, down here in your beloved New Orleans.

9. If anyone ever ask anyone else, then they will say that Alastor, beloved local radio host of New Orleans, is a man of many things. But if they were to ask you, then he’s one of the person you cherished the most, and your dearest friend.

He’s everything, the charming popular radio host of New Orleans, the life of the party, a bachelor that’s second to none. Alastor plays himself as your friendly neighbor who will always greets you with a smile and a clenched fist behind his back, hiding a stain just on the cuff of his sleeve in the early morning, a caring friend that offers you help just in the nick of time. Alastor is his mother’s perfect son, who spent more time comforting her about your whereabouts than to care for his own fracturing mind; an amiable stranger, gripping the newspaper detailing yet another disappearance with a bit too much force. Everything you have ever wanted him to be, he was. And yet, to his utter bewilderment and maddening grief, you refused to let him be anyone other than a friend you talked to about everything.

In the letters you saved from your beloved pen pal-turn-missing person, they would call you mature and wise. Sentimental words and kind, to his eyes, all are but hollowed gestures advising, agreeing, and offering you a place up in Washington until you can forget all about him and move on with your life, leaving Alastor to be nothing more than a nostalgic blot on the tablecloth, nothing more than yearning in early Junes. Until you forget the fact you ever love him at all, all because you decided that you couldn’t afford to let yourself be love by him.

Keeping all of it in mind, Alastor decides your dear friend should be bury far away from the comfort of your room. Three years, seven months and eleven days after your death, Alastor dragged a body into the woods. Not just any old one like usual, but not anything else too special.

It’s odd, even though you’ve been gone for the more than a year by now, it’s almost as if you’ve neve left his side. Maybe it’s the rest of you, lying peacefully in your nest of pillows and blankets, in your room that he diligently maintain. Maybe it’s your shared books he sometimes takes from his shelves and skims through in the dead of night after a hard day. Maybe it’s the locked box, sitting by his work desk welcoming him home after a night out, the same one he held in his hands, void of blood and anything else.

Or maybe it’s the reverberating sounds of heartbeat, so unlike his own. In both his waking days, in his reveries, over the sounds of the jazz band down in his favorite speakeasy and following him into the woods. Ever so silently, oh-so gently, utterly viciously in his left ear.

In any other case, Alastor finds he absolutely adores the idea of your ghost haunting him until his fell into his grave.

(you said that he should never love because he couldn’t be in control. he mourn the fact you never even let him prove you wrong. Alastor would’ve let you dance on his rotting corpse if that’s what it takes for you to let him call you his.)

10.

Somewhere in his heart, Alastor had hoped that you of all people can evade the hand of rots.

It’s a genuine shame that in the end, all of the words in the world will do nothing to stop you from sharing the lot with the others, he thought, staring down from where he straddled you with his hand peeling off layers of skins and fat. Warm fingers brushes against your hollowed cheek, before raising a small hammer and bringing down onto your bare chest. Alastor wants to preserve you for as long as possible, but to do that properly, he might as well take all of your innards out and sewn you up. It’s not that he’s not open to that idea, Alastor love every part of you. It’s just that he’s sure you’ll be extremely upset when you find out. So he’ll have to get comfortable with doing things the hard way, no matter how hard it is to do so.

With steady fingers in spite of the drumming in his ears, Alastor patiently picks out every pieces of bones he could, placing them into a small, wooden box. With a wistful smile, he closes the lid and set it aside. He miss you already.

Pushing your lungs out of the way, he dig his hands in. With blood runs up to his wrist, Alastor tries to be as gentle as he can while pulling your heart out. One hand holding onto it, another carefully cutting away everything that ties it to your body.

Distinctly, every part of you was always warm, and over time, Alastor, who’s hands are as cold as winter itself, find comfort in your touch. It was almost like you were made just for him, and him, you. And now, with your heart, cold and silent in his hand, Alastor realized what a miserable life it will be to go on living without your warmth with him from now on until he’s six feet under. But it’s ok, he’s sure of it, because above all else, what he’s been chasing after this whole time is in his hand.

For a brief moment, Alastor wondered if he were to meet you in another lifetime, one where you aren’t so complicated and so in love with the idea of living a fair life and a right love, would you have let yourself be wrong and love him. But he’s glad that your love, with all its beautiful intricacies that causes him this much pain, with a wound in it, still look as beautiful as he hoped.

Sinking his teeth into it, into you, the taste of iron and metallic flooded his mouth and drown his senses as he closed his eyes shut and nearly buckled under the taste of you. There’s not a single word in the book to describe the visceral sensations running through his blood and spreading through his every veins. Alastor shivers, the back of his head felt numb, his fever grows as he desperately takes his time and savor you. It’s a shame you can’t last forever, but he’ll take what he can get for now.

(as his teeth tears into your veins, he hears a sounds, so familiar, somewhere in the corner of his ears. it wasn’t until he caught his own heart beating that he realized that the rhythm he’s hearing isn’t his at all.

until the day you two can meet again, until then. he pray he will never forget the sounds of your heart, beating so gently.)

[mggsv]

Sukuna never intended on staying. He never does. For him, the best thing to do is to keep moving forward. He was someone a lot of people feared, he has that effect on people. With his four arms, and mouths in places not many could see with his robe on, he was fearless. The strongest, if you will. A king, with the right mindset…he’ll conquer later.

But…Sukuna still, never intended on staying. Then he met you. You..so intriguing to him you were. The way he walked into your village to buy food. You were just a stand owner then. You smiled at him like everyone else- while everyone else cowardly moved away. Sukuna liked that. At least, his body reacted in a way that did. To stay alive he didn’t rely on food- didn’t need it but he liked to eat. He needed intimate acts. Sex. Something from someone else. It wasn’t hard to find- but you..oh he needed you.

And he had you. He came back everyday, he learned your name, you learned his. The sweet sound of you saying “Hello again, Sukuna!” made his soul flutter. However, day by day, with each visit the village seemed to get quieter and quieter.

“They’re afraid.” You had said to him, a sad look on your beautiful face. He had made the decision to stop coming by as much, it was still a shock to those when they did see him, but it was a step. You started to miss him, though. You prepared the food he liked daily, waiting for him to arrive as often as he used to.

Sukuna…never intended on staying. He never intended to meet you and grow attached. He should have left it at that once his demeanor scared everyone. He did not. He came to see you at night instead. Sukuna wanted..he wanted you in ways his body needed. He had you, gladly. Your sweet, beautiful face, scrunched in a pleasured bliss. Your mouth agape, hand reaching at the soft material beneath your head. Sukuna’s arms holding you while his other set of hands touched your most precious parts. Your first time! He couldn’t believe it.

“…Kuna.” you forced out, gasping. The pleasure all too new, even at your age. Music to his ears! He wanted to go faster- he wanted to break you in like the others but something stopped him. His soul flutter again. Your hole clenching around his thick length while your orgasm took over you. So new…it felt that way for Sukuna who stayed all night. Watching over your sleeping frame.

After that, Sukuna should have left. He never wanted to stay. But you..he stayed for you- because of you. Sukuna started coming every night this time. After every work day for you, he’d be waiting at your home, on the porch with a small smirk on your face. And on the inside he held you. Some nights he be soft, other nights he’d be rough. He learned your body well. Sukuna decided to stay when he missed you so much after being away for even the mornings. He wanted to be with you every day. The village will have to deal with it. And they did.

They talked yes, not in your face- you were fine with that. Sukuna wouldn’t let anyone do so, walking with you out in the streets. He put up with you trying your best to get them to like him- as you considered your home, the people in it, your family- putting Sukuna in a nice robe and having him give out samples. It was a tough thing to do, but over time people change. Sukuna did.

Everyone started to realize he wasn’t so bad. Sukuna should have left. A good thing in turn for something worse. You became sick. Sukuna knew why, of course he did. It’s the reason he kept moving forward. For Sukuna to live, another had to lose. Slowly, you were losing yourself. He had to leave, but he couldn’t…he could not be without you.

“I’ll be fine.” you’d say. Of course he told you. He wouldn’t keep such a critical thing away from you.

“I never intended on staying.” He’d say. He could sense your sadness, the tears in your eyes.

“I know.” And that was that. That was that up until that moment. That moment that broke the both of you.

“I love you.” He had whispered. You didn’t reply, you couldn’t reply. Sukuna looked to be talking to himself. Your beautiful smile still on your face, your head felt light..laying there on his lap. Your body became cold over time. Sukuna couldn’t let you go. It had rained that day.

Sukuna, never intended on leaving. How could he? For him, the best thing to do was to stay.

“Papa!” the little patter of feet could be heard coming towards him. A smile on his face as he turned to see a miniature version of..you..smiling up at him, arms stretched.

“Wait- My lord! I’m so sorry, the princess was too excited I-“

“There’s no need.” Sukuna huffed out, picking up the bundle of joy. She looked like you. Your eyes, your smile, everything but the unnatural hair color she sported. “What did I say about running away from your maid?” He had gave her a look, in which the little girl only giggled at.

“Do you see her, my love?” Sukuna rocked his Princess around. He thought of how wonderful life would be now, all of you together like you wanted.

“I’ll never leave.” and he did not.

[livelaughloveloak]

🐳 ᩡ WANNA C U GIRL

aonung x navi! reader oneshot

summary :: Aonung misses you dearly to the point where he starts getting into more trouble. Will you come back and be his saving grace?

author's note :: honestly this is my first Aonung fic so I'm sorry if it's bad. 2.2k Words. Use of she/her pronouns

"Of course the aliens had to ruin it." Aonung snarled with a fish spear in his dominant hand. Aonung was known to be quite rude at times but today he was even more rude, especially to the young sully boys.

"Aonung stop, they are just learning!" Tsireya shoved her brother softly, only hard enough that he stumbled back in the water. All of them were on the shore with fishing gear. Aonung and Tsireya were tasked to help the newcomers with hunting in the Metkayina ways, much to Aonung's dismay.

Of course only being new to this type of fishing they did not do well. Them missing mostly every shot would normally make Aonung burst into a comedic laughter but not this time. Instead it turned into boiling anger. By the time Lo'ak missed his 7th fish in a row Aonung had enough of fishing and told everyone to just go back to shore.

He rolled his eyes at his sister's kind behavior towards them. Tsireya saw this and snickered before turning to the sully boys. "Do not mind him, he's just grumpy because y/n isn't around" Lo'ak and Neteyam looked at eachother, they have heard about this certain Navi before, mostly from Aonung.

They knew very little but just assumed she was a special person to him. And they were right.

Aonung scoffed in annoyance and walked away from the group, towards his own little marui. Of course he missed you, considering he didn't deny it.

You left to go help another clan in their time of need almost a week ago. You were a good warrior and an even better healer so you were chosen by Tonowari to go and help the neighboring tribe that had gotten attacked by the sky people.

"Aonung I'll be fine." You said as he was behind you, attaching your necklace that happened to be a gift from him. "I'm still not sure. I mean what if the sky people come back and ambush you guys"

You rolled your eyes, you knew he was just concerned but you were still a strong warrior nonetheless. "I promise you I'll return perfectly fine."

You reassured him but only got a hum in return. You were waiting for Aonung to say something but instead you felt his breath on your neck causing the hairs to stand up. Aonung stayed like this for a while before wrapping his arms around your waist from behind and resting his head in the crook of your neck.

"Promise?"

"Promise."

Aonung laid down on his hammock, swaying side to side trying to keep his mind blank from the thought of you. You alone tend to fill up his thoughts and dreams, he didn't mind though.

With a groan Aonung shifted from position to position, trying to find a more comfortable way to lay down. Soon enough he settled on laying on his side, back facing the marui opening. He closed his eyes tired from the day filled with anger and yelling.

Aonung felt himself slowly drifting into the blank void called sleep.

Waves clashed against the sea shore as the daylight slowly started to fade into navy blue. You looked up from your half weaved armband, seeing the stars that filled the night sky. Suddenly you remembered Aonung.

“My mom would take me here to go stargazing as a kid, it was only me, Tsireya wasn't born yet.”

He told you this the day you two went to that special spot on top of a small island so you could watch as the stars slowly moved and twinkled. Oh how you missed Aonung.

As the days went by it slowly turned into weeks. You were in this tribe for 3 weeks, helping them get on their feet again. You healed the wounded and hunted in place for the warriors who got too injured.

You counted the days as they went by, each day was a day closer to going back home. The people here were kind but you missed talking or more likely gossiping to Tsireya, you missed playing with the Metkayina kids, but most importantly you missed Aonung.

With a sigh you finally got out of your marui to go collect herbs since you were running low on them. You said hello to a few people on the way and smiled at the kids who waved at you.

You picked your herbs in a small farm that the locals made. Luckily the sky people didn't ruin this part of the small island because without it the people wouldn't have ointment to treat their wounded or medicine for the people who fell ill.

You filled up your basket and gently placed it against your hip so you could walk back to the healing tent.

Your walk back got interrupted by a deep voice. "Y/n" You jumped, dropping some plants from the basket. You picked them up then turned around only to see the chief, Tonowari.

You quickly bowed your head and reached your arm up to your forehead to sign a formal.

‘I see you’

Tonowari smiled at the gesture before talking. "Today you and the others are going home, I have decided to end things early since the people here seem like they can fend for their own now." Tonowari waved his stick around motioning for you to look at the people.

"Go, pack your stuff, we leave once the sun sets." And with that Tonowari turned and walked away leaving you there with the basket filled with multiple healing herbs.

You looked down and smiled before running back to your marui that the Tsahik of this clan built for you as your temporary home. You were finally going to see Aonung again.

"I'm disappointed in you Aonung." Ronal circled around the young navi that had purple bruises forming on his face. Just like yesterday, Aonung had gotten into another fight with a Metkayina boy.

"Go before I pluck your eyes out!" Ronal hissed and pointed to the Marui exit.

Aonung quickly got up from his kneeling position and hurried out with his head hanging low and tail in-between his legs. He was embarrassed, he had made a fool out of himself, at first he felt pride after winning the fight but it all went downhill once a familiar voice shouted his name. His mother.

Other Navi stared silently at Aonung's sulking frame. Ronal's yells of frustration were loud enough for people to hear. His ears pinned back in shame, all his pride was washed away by now after he felt the eyes all over him.

He scrunched his nose and finally looked up. "What are you looking at?" Aonung said with venom in his voice, it wasn't specifically to a certain person but rather everyone who acknowledged his presence. All of the other Navi quickly looked away and went to the previous task they were doing before the whole thing occurred.

Aonung grumbled and kicked the sand underneath him before continuing to walk towards his Marui. He wished nothing but to sleep the pain away even.

The sun was slowly setting as Aonung finally arrived. He didn't go inside but instead sat on the edge, dangling his feet in the lukewarm water. The water in the reef was a beautiful clear blue.

It was so clear that you can see the fish and ilu swimming around the different coral, sometimes going into the seaweed. If you were lucky you'd see a baby ilu with its mother.

Aonung stayed like this, staring into the water with his hands resting on his lap. He was never a quiet person but today he needed it more than ever.

His peace was disturbed by a loud horn made by a shell. The shell was used to warn the clan of someone's arrival. He peered out, squinting so he could get a better look at whoever was about to step onto the shore.

‘Are they back?’

He got excited for a second thinking that you were finally back from your mission.

His eyes scanned the area very carefully, he even double checked just to make sure he didn't miss you by accident. He was left with disappointment. You were nowhere in the crowd.

‘Oh right they don't come back until next week.’

The moment you stepped off of your ilu you begin to search around the crowd of cheering and welcoming Navi for a specific person. You were left confused when you found nothing, it was like everyone was there except him.

“You better be here waiting with a basket filled with delicious food once I come back” You teased Aonung, poking his chest as you were getting ready to start your journey to the other island.

“Ugh you wish” Aonung softly pushed you causing a laugh to come out of your mouth.

"Y/n!"

You turned around to find Tsireya walking towards you with open arms. You two hugged before pulling back once you saw unfamiliar faces behind her. Tsireya glanced over her shoulder and gasped, making you even more confused.

"Oh right!" Tsireya took a hold of your hand and guided you towards them.

"Y/n this is Lo'ak and Neteyam, their family has come here seeking uturu."

‘uturu?’ You thought. You heard about other clan members coming to a whole new one to seek peace and to live with them but you never actually witnessed it until now. You watched as they signed

‘i see you’

towards you. You replied with a smile, doing the gesture back.

"We have heard lots about you." The taller one said which you believe was Neteyam. You raised your eyebrows at his words and turned towards Tsireya seeking for an answer which she thankfully gave. "They mean Aonung, you know he can't keep his big mouth shut." Tsireya nudged your shoulder in a teasing way as you giggled thinking about it.

"Speaking about Aonung, where is he?”

Tsireya went silent, her mouth forming a straight line. She slowly pointed to the direction of his Marui. "Beware y/n he isn't in the best mood right now."

You nodded and quickly headed in the direction she was pointing at. Your tail was swaying anxiously. Was he perhaps mad at you?

By the time you reached his tent you froze, debating if you should enter or not. You didn't wanna face him if he was mad at you, you were scared. You wouldn't know what to say. You were so lost in thought that you didn't even see the taller figure walking towards you.

"Y/n?"

You snapped out of your trance and saw Aonung leaning against one of the support poles that keeps his Marui standing. He had cuts and bruises all over his face and body.

His knuckles were red and wounded, it seemed like he got into a fight. You covered your mouth with your hand as you stepped closer to him. "Oh Aonung" You whispered while inspecting his body closer

Once you were done looking you grabbed his hand and led him inside. You made him sit down in the far corner of the room that had medical supplies stacked up against the wall.

"When I said I promised to stay safe I meant you should too." You grabbed ointment from one of the pouches and then sat down on his lap facing him.

Aonung stayed silent watching you apply it on his knuckles until he finally spoke up. "I know."

You were the one who was silent now, you kept your questions to yourself deciding that you'd ask them another time and that you should just focus on treating his wounds.

You wrapped his hand with bandages and moved on to applying a herb that specializes in reducing swelling on his busted lip and bruised up eye. You felt his eyes staring at you, watching your every move. You tried your best to ignore it so you wouldn't get flustered and mess up on properly dressing his wounds.

Aonung kept his eyes locked onto yours as you gently tapped his lips to apply the ointment. "Please Aonung, be careful next time." You begged him. Of course you never liked it when he got into fights but at this point Aonung isn't really Aonung unless he comes to you seeking for your medical health every one in awhile.

"I was fighting for you."

"What?"

"I fought them because they were talking bad about you." Aonung watched carefully, seeing how you stopped your movements and dropped your arms to your side. He took this as his cue to continue. "They were saying how you were weird and didn't belong amongst the other girls. I couldn't just stand there and hear all of this without doing anything about it."

Of course you were upset finding out that people who you probably never even talked to had your name in their mouths, but you felt some sort of comfort knowing that Aonung stepped in for the sake of you. "My love it is okay their words won't affect me." You brushed away one of his loose locks that must've fallen from his braids.

"No it is not-"

You shushed him with a kiss on the lips that he was quick to return. "It's fine, I promise." Aonung stayed silent, continuing to stare in your eyes lovingly.

His eyebrows raised when you got up from his lap, holding his hand signaling for you to follow him. He obeyed and got up to which you started to drag him out of the Marui.

"Where are we going?"

You sarcastically gasped to tease him. "Don't you trust me?"

Aonung rolled his eyes before rushing to walk by your side so you wouldn't be dragging him behind you. You smiled and looked at him. "Come I have made something for you my love."

[hisui-dreamer]

CONGRATS ON 1K RINNAAAA :((( YOU WERE ONE OF MY FIRST MOOTS EVER AND ITS MAKES ME SO HAPPY AND PROUD THAT YOU HIT THIS MILESTONE!! THANK YOU FOR BEING ONE OF THE MOST WARM AND WELCOMING PEOPLE IVE MET IN THIS FANDOM <33 YOURE SUCH A GIFT ITS INSANE!!!!!

IM SURE THIS DOESNT SURPRISE YOU BUT!!! for the 1k event i was thinking soulmate au with azul (HEHE) except its the doodle one? LIKE WHERE YOU DOODLE ON YOUR BODY AND YOUR SOULMATES GETS THE SAME MARKINGS YK

and i have a habit of doodling sea creatures like octopi and morays on my arms and hands so i think it'd be cute for him to like, take his gloves off one day and just see a little eel on the back of his hand :((( squishy guy <3333

headcanons or a drabble is totally fine, whichever one is easier for you!!!! thank you for easing me into this fandom :(( i will never be able to thank you enough for making my anxious ass WAY less nervous <3 and no pressure if this doesnt inspire you ofc hehe you're never obligated to write anything !!! :D

the doodles that drew us together

Pairing: Azul Ashengrotto x gn!reader

Synopsis: Azul thought all his life he didn't have a soulmate...

Tags: soulmates au (doodling), reader is yuu, fluff, comfort, reader likes sea creatures, bot proofread

Word count: 591

Notes: aubbie thank you so much!!! I'm so glad we became moots, you're one of my closest friends and everything I see something azul related I think of you haha! I hope you'll enjoy this azul soulmate au ♪⁠ヽ⁠(⁠･⁠ˇ⁠∀⁠ˇ⁠･⁠ゞ⁠)

Masterlist

Azul had been fascinated by the idea of soulmates as a young mer

it was something that gave him hope, that despite all the other mean mers who would make fun of him, there was someone out there who would understand him and love him

and so he kept drawing on his arm, doodles of shells and other fish that caught his eye

but there wasn't any response.

maybe his doodles were too ugly and his soulmate didn't like them?

and so he learned to draw better, drawing again and again, hoping he would get a response

but still not a single mark would appear on him

it had been a tough blow to him, but he eventually accepted that he didn't have a soulmate

if he was going to be alone for all his life, then he had to take care of himself (because nobody would)

he became super greedy and selfish, always prioritising himself and his materialistic needs

although he also had a friendship with the tweels, he really only befriended them because they could help him out (but he did get attached to them over time)

and so, he opened the mostro lounge and became the sly businessman that we all know

on the first day of his second year, as he was going over documents after closing the lounge, he felt a slight tingle in his hand

Azul's eyebrow rose in response to an unexpected sensation. A peculiar warmth, like a gentle caress, emanated from the back of his gloved hand. Intrigued, he swiftly removed his gloves, revealing smooth, pale skin. A gasp of astonishment escaped his lips as his eyes fell upon a minuscule masterpiece, a tiny, adorable octopus delicately inked in pen.

"Is this...real?" Azul murmured, his voice tinged with disbelief. A surge of hope surged through his entire being, dispelling the weight that had burdened him for far too long.

With a trembling hand, he grasped his own pen and cautiously began to sketch his own octopus upon his wrist, with one tentacle reaching out, holding hands with your octopus.

And he can't stop he smile that graces his lips when a little heart appears between the two octopi.

What a hectic day it had been! For a magicless student to arrive in NRC and for him to finally connect with his soulmate!

...?

Oh. Azul had to speak to said magicless student as soon as possible.

when the two of you start being a couple, Azul does everything and anything for you

when you're in exams and your nervously doodling sea creatures, he'll draw some flowers nearby to help calm you down

no he doesn't help you cheat by writing you the answers, he's already given you the perfect study materials, you shoud put in some effort too

he gets jealous if you draw other sea creatures too much though, especially moray eels

he lets you work at the lounge with a very high pay, making sure you're not working too hard, and always offers to tutor you if you're struggling

his soulmate had to go to a different world just to find him, you'll be sure he helps to settle in and hopefully never leave again

Insert clingy octopus wrapping his tentacles all around you because he can't bare to let you go

when you have dates and appointments, he'll help remind you by writing on his arm

this man has waited for you his entire life, he's ready to lay the world down at your feet if you ask him to

Masterlist

if you liked this post, don't forget to reblog!

[multific]

Attached to You

Modern!AU

Billy Hargrove x Reader

A/N: I'm not a doctor nor am I medically trained, so, there are things here which are incorrect. Please ignore them and try to enjoy the piece as it is. Thank you.

Summary: After a one-night stand, you find out you are pregnant, thanks to your doctor's bad advice, it turned out that your pills weren't effective. Leaving you with a baby, you have lots of decisions to make.

"I only told you because you deserve to know. I don't want anything from you. I will deal with this myself." 

Your words rang in his head over and over again.

It had been almost two weeks since he last saw you and now, he wasn't sure what he was doing.

Billy couldn't stop thinking about you. How you smiled at him even when he could see you were close to a breakdown.

It was all meant to be one night. Something he had done many many times before.

When he saw you sitting alone at the bar, he was quick to make his move. Flirting with you was easy as you blushed at every word he said. He soon learned about an ex of yours, the guy, as you explained, was rather obsessive about you and didn't want to let go of you, which is why you were hiding in a bar.

And so, Billy took this as a sign and brought you home.

It wasn't meant to end like this. He always made sure to have a condom with him. All the time. Of course, the one time when he doesn't, he gets someone pregnant...

But even so, you didn't look mad, you didn't demand money or anything from him. You just smiled and moved on.

He didn't even know your name. All he had is a phone number.

"You can delete my number as well. I won't look for you. All I wanted is for you to know since you are the father."

Father.

A word that scared him.

A word which meant nothing to him as he too, never had a father.

The realization hit him like a cold shower, he didn't have a father, so he knows just how hard it is to grow up without one, and here he was, the exact same as his.

He will have a child, who won't know their father. Who will go through the same pain as he did. Who will see their mother slowly crumble under all the pressure.

He is no better than his own asshole father.

This was unfair. 

He could run. Men could run from the responsibility since they weren't attached to the baby, but women couldn't.

---

Billy felt like a piece of shit. 

It had been almost two months since he last saw you.

And he couldn't help but wonder what 'dealing with it' meant for you. Did it mean you got an abortion? Or did you keep the child?

This was eating him alive.

He needed to find you and have another conversation with you. But you didn't pick up the phone nor did you reply to any text he sent.

He set out to the club he originally met you.

"Why the fuck did I think a pregnant woman would be in a club?!"

IF you were still pregnant.

The next couple days were awful for him.

Trying to find you, he went to the café you invited him to, no sign, he went to a hospital and asked if they knew about you. But of course, they couldn't give out any information.

You were all he could think about. 

You and the baby he might have already lost.

Billy didn't feel like himself. 

And then, one day, he spotted you. As he was walking down the street when he noticed you on the other side. 

He followed you like a creep.

Dodging people, running. He followed you. Tried to call out but since he didn't know your name, it was difficult.

You went into a pharmacy and he stopped by the front door. His heart was beating fast, not only from running.

"Hi. I have some pills prescribed for me." he could hear you say. The pharmacist took a look and turned to you. 

"Can I ask for your full name?"

"Y/N Y/L/N."

"You have... pregnancy vitamins prescribed by Dr Drew."

"Correct." you smiled. Oh God, that smile taunted him.

"Alright, let me get that for you."

He felt himself calm a little. Pregnancy vitamins. Why did they have to prescribe those for you anyway? But this meant you still had the baby.

"So, since this kind is... stronger, we recommend you take only one daily. If you skip a day do not take two the next day. Technically these are not vitamins, they are just called that. Is your pregnancy i-"

"The doctor said these are the best for my condition. So I need to take them."

"These are for you not the baby." she was rather rude as you tried to ignore her.

"I know."

"Alright, anything else I can give you?"

"Do you have any of those shooting creams? For when the skin stretches?"

"For the stretch marks? We have one, which is cold and another which is warm. One helps shoot the skin the other helps the marks to be less visible."

"I would like the one that shoots the skin, please. That would be all."

Billy watched as you paid for everything before he quickly exited so you wouldn't notice him.

Pregnancy vitamins... for you not for the baby. And you had a condition?

He watched as you walked away, but as you did a man ran into you. The man continued on while you nearly fell over.

"Watch where you are going, Asshole!" Billy pushed the man as he passed him, before he helped you. "Are you okay?"

He only realized that he was now holding your arm as you looked up at him. When did he get this close to you?

"O-Oh, yes. I'm fine thanks." he saw it in your eyes, you realized who he was soon after as you took a step back. "Thank you." you adjusted your bag before starting to walk and he knew he couldn't let you leave.

"Can we-Can we talk, Y/N?" he suddenly spoke up and you turned to him.

"If you want to." he nodded and you guided him to a nearby park and sat down on a bench.

An awkward silence filled the air. 

He knew he needed to talk. 

He took a deep breath.

"I was scared when you said you would deal with it, that you meant... abortion."

"I'm not going to lie, I thought about every option. It was one of them but... I decided against it."

"I-I heard you at the pharmacy..."

"Oh, you were there?" you looked up at him, genuinely surprised. 

"You got some meds..." he nodded as he pointed at your bag. 

"I-The doctor said it is okay to take pregnancy vitamins. But it turned out that I was the one needing them, not the baby. The doctor said my body puts the baby as a priority and takes away nutrition from me. We found out during my eight weeks when I asked the doctor if it was normal that I feel very dizzy. He did some checks and yeah. But... why are you asking me this?"

"Because for the last weeks, I couldn't stop thinking about you and the baby."

"You don't have to. You are not guilty or anything."

"I grew up without a father. I saw my mother going through so much shit. I don't want you to go through all that. I want to be a father to my child. Someone I never had."

You took a moment to fully digest what he just said. He waited anxiously for an answer. 

"Look, I will have a baby soon, a baby who can become attached. If they become attached to you and then you later decide that you don't want to do this... I believe that is worse. So, while I do appreciate your concerns, I was nothing more to you than a quick fuck. It is... unfortunate, that I got pregnant, but as I said it is something I am dealing with. So, please, if you don't mean it, don't get involved. You might think now that you want to be a part of this because you pity me or whatever, but if you change your mind..."

"I don't want to change my mind. Yes, it was meant to be a one-night stand but I can't ignore a child. My child. I'm not a coward. I want to be a part of the life of this little one." 

You looked into his eyes, trying to figure him out. He looked serious. Maybe he really had a change of heart during the last couple months. You pulled out your wallet and a picture from it. You handed it to him.

He looked at the ultrasound.

"I'm currently 11 weeks along. The baby is 41mm long. The doctor said it's the size of a fig. We don't know the gender just yet, but they are healthy."

"Healthy. Good." he wanted to hand back the photo but you didn't take it.

"I have more at home, you can have that. I have a check-up next week, you could come if you have time."

"I'll be there."

You stood up and were about to walk away when you turned to look at him.

"If you don't come next week. I mean without a good reason, I don't want you to come after. I am already very attached to this little fig, and I don't want them hurt."

"I'll be there, text me the time and place."

You nodded before saying goodbye and walking away.

He stayed, looking at the picture.

"My little fig." he smiled before he too, headed home.

---

Honestly, you were shocked to see him at the doctor's the next week. 

Every time he showed up.

He started to take you out to eat afterwards and started to ask more and more questions.

Billy asked you to move into his place which you didn't want but you did go over to his place many times.

You spent most of your weekends there. And lately, you even spent your nights there. In a separate room, but you did stay.

"What are you doing?"

"Shhhh! I heard babies can hear voices, I'm talking to them so they would recognize me when they are born." you shook your head as you continued to look at stuff on your phone. Subconsciously, one of your hands found his hair. You started to run your fingers through his locks as he continued to softly speak to the baby.

"We should get married." you nearly threw your phone at the TV.

"What?" you sat up so quickly you nearly gave yourself whiplash. He moved with you as he sat in front of you. The expression on his face was as serious as ever.

"You heard me. Marry me?"

"Why would I... What? No. Just because of the baby? That is-"

"Logical. We get married, you take my last name and the baby does too. It is logical."

"Did you hit your head or something?"

"What? Why?"

"You? Marriage?"

"Yes."

"Like in the old days? You get the woman pregnant and so you have to marry her?"

"I was thinking more about the baby and you. In case something happens to me, you two would be good on money."

"I don't want your money."

"I know you don't, I am giving it to you and the baby. We don't have to, but you can think about it."

"I honestly don't know."

"I know you probably wanted to marry out of love, fuck I never wanted to get married but here I am. With a baby on the way and with you. You are such an amazing girl, Y/N. I'm happy that you are the mother of my baby."

'"I'm very glad to hear that Billy, however, marriage is a big thing. Now don't get me wrong I have heard about people getting married for less and I'm not the biggest in the love department either. I truly believe you should marry someone you can see yourself for the rest of your life with and not be crazy in love with them but..."

"You told me this before. You said 'but you still believe that there should be love for marriage and not like love between friends.' And then you started crying because you couldn't explain yourself fully and I had to get you ice cream."

"Exactly."

"What would make you want to marry me?"

You placed your hand on his cheek.

"You might think now that its a good idea. You might think now that you would want me by your side forever, but I know Billy that one day, you would look at me and be disappointed that you married me because of our baby. One day you will be in a club, surrounded by girls and drinks and you won't think of me or our child, I want a loyal husband, and I wouldn't want you to throw the accusation at me, saying that you only married me for the baby and you would end up hating me."

"You believe that would happen? That I would regret it all and I would... what? Blame you for it?"

"Yes."

"You think that lowly of me?"

"No, I think that lowly of myself." you let out a sigh. "Look Billy, tell me that we are not here just because of the baby. You wouldn't be here if I wasn't pregnant. You would be out there as you were before. You don't want me, you want the baby. And that is completely fine. And it is all I can ask for. For you to love the kid. That's it."

"But I do love you. You are the mother of my child. How can I not?"

"Billy, please. You only care for me because of the baby. And I know that and it's okay."

Billy wanted to tell you that it wasn't true. That he truly cared for you. More than you could imagine.

He wanted to lift all of your insecurities and show you just how amazing you were.

But he did. Because he was afraid. 

Not of losing his old life, but of losing you. 

If you didn't believe him like this, he will prove his love in other ways.

---

You smiled as you saw the roses on the table. They looked amazing. 

Beautiful white roses with a little note.

You debated picking it up and reading it until you saw your name on the paper.

'To my beautiful wife' it read on the inside and it made you scoff.

Since when did he become such a romantic?

You let out a long sigh. 

Billy was trying way too hard. You were afraid one day he will realize this is not what he wants and just pack up and leave.

You were terrified that he will make you get used to his closeness and then pull away, leaving you to fall alone.

You really tried to keep your distance, to not fall in love or to not harbour feelings that would hurt you.

You really tried but it was very difficult because each time you saw his eyes sparkle as he looked at you, each time at the doctor's when he asked something about you or the baby, it made you feel so safe and happy.

When he asked you to marry him, you were ready to say yes. It was your first thought when he asked the question but then you realized your situation.

He doesn't love you to get married. He wants the baby around and that's fine.

You felt like you were lulling yourself into false realities and you couldn't let that happen.

Not with you becoming a mother.

Not with you knowing about his past. It felt like wherever you went you could see girls staring at you, eyeing you up and down. The dark thought of who he had slept with was always in the back of your head.

You knew you should let it go.

But it is easier said than done. 

You were making lunch when Billy arrived home.

"Here you are. I actually wanted to go out for food, but I guess its too late now."

"Yeah, maybe tomorrow. Thank you for the flowers." you gave him a small smile.

"Did you like it?"

"Yes, they are beautiful."

"And the card?" 

"Card?"

"Yes, wrote it myself actually. Did you like it?"

You turned back to the oven and got the pan out. Billy only shook his head as he smirked before he left to take a quick shower.

Soon, he joined you at the table.

Eating the chicken you made.

"I have an appointment tomorrow."

"I know. It's baby gender time." he smiled.

"Yeah. What would you prefer? A boy or a girl?"

"Either is fine really. What about you?"

"I thought I wanted a son, but lately I have been imagining a little girl and I realized I would be fine with any really."

"Should we have one of those crazy gender reveal parties?"

"Oh gosh, no! You know I hate to be the centre of attention. I'm fine if the doctor tells us."

"Just an idea. Then I can at least finish their room."

"Oh, I did order more things. I wanted to wait for you with the furniture though. Since you want to paint the room."

"We will know the gender tomorrow, so I can paint this weekend, then we can look at furniture and finish it up in a couple weeks." he nodded. "We are a good team, Y/N."

"Yeah, we are." you agreed as you finished your chicken and went to wash your plates.

Soon, you felt his arms move around you as you put the dishes to dry.

The way he held you, you let yourself imagine what if he loved you. What if the baby wasn't an accident? What if he wanted to be here for you?

"Y/N, marry me."

"Billy," you groaned as you turned in his arms, seeing the serious expression on his face you fell silent.

"I am serious. I love you both so much, please, marry me." he reached into his pocket and pulled out a small box, it was a jewellery box so it had to be a ring. And as he opened it, sure enough, it was. A rather expensive looking one at that. "I want to give you and our child the world. I want us to be a real family. Would you marry me?" You needed a moment to think.

"Yes. I will marry you." he smiled as he placed the ring on your finger, pulling you in for a breath-taking kiss.

"I love you so much." he said as his lips moved to your neck. His hands grabbed the back of your thighs as he lifted you and carried you to the bedroom.

"I love you too," you whispered to him as he began to remove your clothes, kissing your baby bump.

His eyes were filled with love, you couldn't look away.

---

The next day, you lay on the examination table with butterflies in your stomach.

You will finally know if you are having a girl or a boy.

Billy stood beside you, holding your hand as he smiled.

"As you can see, the head, two little hands and legs." the doctor said pointing everything out on the screen. "Are we ready to know the gender?"

"Yes." you said as Billy squeezed your hand.

"Let's see... Looks to be a little girl." she said as you looked at Billy whose eyes were glued to the monitor, smiling softly to himself.

"Then we can get the pink shoes you have been eyeing." you said as he finally looked at you.

During a recent trip to the mall, you found him in the kid's section when you were looking for some clothes. You found him standing there with a pink princess shoe in his hand as he smiled at the pink glittery object.

"Looks like we can." he said before he moved to place a kiss on your forehead.

You were really glad you judged him wrong.

You were glad he turned out to be a loving person and he grew into his potential. You knew he will be an amazing father and husband. 

Judging by the small smile on his face, it said it all.

The little girl had him wrapped around her tiny little fingers and she wasn't even born yet.

When the doctor left to print out the photos for you, he turned to you, kissing your lips.

"I love you so much." he said before moving back to look at the screen. In the end, it was Billy who became attached to you and your daughter. You felt a wave of happiness wash over you as all of your insecurities and worries left your body.

All that was left was happiness. 

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[sophswritingthings]

listen… seen a lot of the trope where mizu pushes away / distances off from the reader to avoid attachment. yeah that trope…. except eventually mizu falls HARD for the reader but the reader thinks that she hates them so they avoid her and just hangs out with ringo instead cooking food and preparing medicine. 👀

pairing: mizu x fem!reader

warning(s): swearing, angst for all you weak sapphics..... like myself

a/n: yo I read this and I swear I grabbed my chest IN PAIN

summary: you were so convinced that mizu hated you. she hated you with a passion to her heart; but you learn that is the farthest thing from the truth.

word count: 1,410 words / 7,420 characters

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mizu was sure from the day that she met you; that she felt something for you. it was deep inside her heart. it weighed her down like the weights on her body.

she couldn't get too close though. she spoke to you rarely, only doing it when she needed to. she kept her distance. she couldn't be attached to you; she had a purpose to fulfill. a purpose she couldn't have people getting in the way of; especially not you.

but she definitely noticed you. oh, god, did she notice you. those beautiful eyes, the way your hair fell on your shoulders. the flower you wore in your hair. she had no clue what it meant; but it meant something. she wanted to know, dear god, did she want to know.

she had fallen for you, and at this point, it wasn't something she could deny. she wanted to deny it--damn it, did she want to deny it! but she couldn't. it was a love so close to her heart that it had a grip on her. a grip that wouldn't loosen.

but it still couldn't distract her from her mission--so she pushed you away. she pushed you so far away, it had convinced you that she hated you. hated you with the same fiery flame that she hated the man who made her. the men she was sworn to kill.

so you opted to spend your time with ringo; mizu's sweet and kind hearted "apprentice" not that mizu would ever admit she did have him as her apprentice, and that she did enjoy his company.

why'd you have to fall for this hard ass of a samurai and not a sweet soul like ringo?

you sighed, sorting through herbs and spices with the young man. you glanced at him. he had known mizu longer, if only for a little longer. maybe he would know something of the woman.

"ringo, i have a question," you brush your fingers across his arm, catching his attention. "what do you know of mizu?"

"what do I know of her? well, I feel we know the same amount," he chuckled, turning back to his bowl of herbs and spices as he mixed and mixed. "a skilled samurai and a fierce warrior."

"well.. yes, I know that," you murmur, handing him another bottle of spice. "but... emotionally. what do you know of her.. emotionally?"

he hummed in a gentle "hmmm", "she doesn't open up very much, (y/n)."

"hence why I thought maybe you'd know," you sigh. "I think she hates me, ringo. I really think she hates me."

"hates you? why, I--"

he stopped himself. god, why did he stop himself?

"ringo..." you whisper, "what--do you know? all I need to know is she doesn't want me dead."

"of course she does not want you dead," he chuckles.

you take in a sharp inhale, "well, that much is good," you laugh with him. "has she... she hasn't said anything else, has she?"

"she does say how annoying you are. how annoying your pretty face is, your pretty eyes and your distracting smile--"

ringo pauses again. seems he realizes he's said too much.

you scoff, "you're fucking with me," you hiss. "she--she couldn't of said that. no, not mizu. she'd never say that."

"I would never lie to you, (y/n)," ringo raises an eyebrow at you. "you are my best friend."

fuck.

fuck. fuck!

ringo was maybe the most honest person in the entire world. you knew he wasn't lying to you. not that you didn't want to hear it, but...

"I, um, thank you, ringo."

frankly; you didn't know what to make of the information. could you just approach mizu and tell her? no, that'd never work. she'd deny everything in a damn heartbeat.

"you.. wouldn't mind me telling you something, would you, ringo?"

"of course not!" he smiles that bright smile.

"i.. really like mizu. like.. in a love, kind of way," you blushed brightly. "I always thought she hated me."

"can I tell you a secret?" he giggles, leaning into your ear. "I think she likes you in a love way, too."

the words were music to your ears.

you were going to talk to her, and you were gonna do it now. you gently patted ringo's head as you stood up.

"thank you ringo," you smile. "im... gonna go talk to her."

"yes!" ringo chirps, smiling, "(y/n) must tell master how she feels."

you giggle, "and I will. I'll be back!"

you slip out of the room, finding mizu getting ready to soak in the bathroom in the house they had been staying at. the two of you lock eyes, for a moment, before she disappears into the room fully.

you follow. god, you followed her. were you actually looking to make her hate you?

"um, mizu," you clear your throat, catching her attention. she was half dressed, now, her binded chest now exposed to you fully. she looked to be reaching for her hair.

she nods her head to acknowledge your presence. "(y/n)," the way your name rolled off her tongue made your heart race.

"I had just been speaking to ringo, and--ive.. decided you speak yo you about something," that was when you began undressing. you removed the flower in your hair, slipping out of your kimono and wading into the water. you might as well do this somewhere she didn't have access to her sword.

she looks at you with a puzzled expression, her eyes following the curves of your body as you get into the water. she does the same, dropping the rest of her clothes and getting in the water. she keeps her distance from you, though. half way across the bath.

"and what is so important that you have decided to bathe with me?"

you chuckle nervously, your eyes trailing her body. she looked so damn good soaking wet.

"you see.. i.."

you just needed to go for it.

"I am.. I find you attractive, mizu, and I believe it like you in a.. romantic, sense, im not going to hold that in anymore." you inhale sharply.

she looks at you with wide eyes. she had spent so long pushing you away, and yet here you were, confessing to her--

it hit her.

--ringo.

"what did ringo say to you?" she narrowed her eyes.

she had accidentally said so much stupid shit to her apprentice. what of it had he repeated back to you, and how deep of a hole was she in?

"tell me exactly what he told you."

you nod a little.

"h-he said you said that said I had an annoyingly pretty face.. a-and eyes, and a distracting smile--"

fuck. she did say that.. didn't she?

"he is dead to me," she grumbles under her breath. she sighed, gazing back at you. "but I digress."

surprisingly, she slid closer to you.

"I happened to say those things," one of her hands climb under your chin, titling you head up to meet her eyes. "is that.. a problem?"

you're face turns beat red when she touches you. you were so used to her staying so distanced it caught you off guard.

"it.. isn't a problem, no," you whisper. "I was only wondering.." your gaze slowly drifts away from hers.

she jerks your head to gaze at her again, "wondering what?"

"if you felt as I did," you murmur, gazing at her. "you.. made me feel as if you hated me."

those words stung. they really stung. that was never her intention.

"I apologize," she shifts a bit closer. "that was never what I meant to do, (y/n), it is only that... I cannot get close to people out here, for fear that they will be injured. or get me hurt. or that they will leave me."

you nod. understandable.

"I understand," you whisper. "but I have no intention of letting any of that happen."

her words light a fire inside her heart. a confidence, a passion.

she pulls you close, her hands cradling either side of your face. she presses her lips against yours, the kiss gentle yet filled with an unspoken desire. one she had carried for months...

you hummed, you hand reaching up to brush a strand of hair behind the samurai's ear.

she pulls back a little, a rare smile crossing her lips.

"will you do me the honor of being mine, then?"

"I certainly will."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

a/n: crying screaming throwing up