me currently:
“i want people to have crushes on me so badly because i thrive on external validation and im super insecure so i really really want people to have crushes on me”
also me, being aroace and sex/romance-repulsed (if someone has a crush on me):
“pleasepleasepleaseplease nobody have a crush on me and ESPECIALLY DONT TELL ME because then i have to reject you and i hate rejecting people and then i’ll probably have to come out to avoid hurting anyone because i overthink everything ahahahha”
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"can I be [x gender] if I..." "can I still call myself [x term] if..." yes. yes. if you like the term then use it. do whatever you want forever. labels are just little words we use to categorize our infinitely complex existential experiences on this floating rock !! no two people who use the same label are going to experience it the same way and that's the beauty of it !! use "contradictory" labels, use labels that don't make sense to anyone, change your label every day or not at all, explore anything and everything, use no labels at all or every label under the sun, confuse people or correct them or let them assume things rather than explaining, I promise nothing other people think about your identity is worth your happiness !!
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Important tip for trans men/transmascs/whoever needs the reminder: Even if you pass as a man to cis people, you still need to have either some form of self-protection on you (e.g., mace, knives (if you can use them effectively), ect.) or know some form of self-defense. Please take it from me, you don't know what will happen out there at any given time.
You might assume that if you pass as a cis man to cis people, you will be safe from any harm. While I wish that were true, it simply isn't the world most of us live in. Please do whatever you can to protect yourself out there.
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why do people gatekeep queer identies?? like,, isn't the whole point of the queer community that we're sick of being told who we are and aren't allowed to be?? stop shunning queer people for being queer in ways you don't like
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The Half of It (2020) dir. Alice Wu
Portrait of a Lady on Fire (2019) dir. Céline Sciamma
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a girl will do/say the most dorky, silly or stupid thing in the world and I will be like ooaoaoaogghhhhhh. make out with m ee
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MY OCS IRIS AND DEVIA, MY BELOVEDS
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also it really is shit how several popular bloggers were like. Horribly bigoted towards ace people when it was cool, but once it stopped being trendy they 1) deleted those posts so receipts couldn't be pulled 2) maybe put up claimed "redactions" or said "omg its been years if you really wanna know wether i still hate those people dm me" but never apologized for their behavior lmao. I don't think any of the people who did that actually changed, I just think they know it's not such an acceptable/fun target to bully anymore. It's really sick how that type of bullying was encouraged for years and how few people repented for their behavior.
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More of this kind of Queer rep please and thank you!
So I watched Good Omens and LOVE how being queer is not being treated like something you have to point out or make a coming out story for or even assume that relationships are consisting strictly of a hetero couple and it just feels so amazing to have that.
Then I watched Nimona (Netflix) and Strange World (Disney) that both had a mlm relationship that was treated like any other relationship, as normal, as what you see between them looks romantic because it IS.
Media for kids and media for adults (OFMD, Sandman, etc) not being JUST about being queer but telling a story where some of the characters just ARE and that's normal is something I really didn't expect to see when I was a kid. Its so beautiful. Their love is part of the story but being queer is not what the story is all about.
I've been getting straight friends to watch them with me and just sit back to watch their Oh. moment at the end vs where its so obvious to me from the beginning. If you normalize it enough they'll start considering that's normal to expect too I hope.
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I hate that whenever there's a gay ship, people immediately het-ify it. people are so obsessed with making one the "man" and one the "woman" when that's completely unnecessary, because they are both the man or the woman. It's extremely annoying. these people will completely mischaracterize a character to fit into their stupid little het roles they force on them.
for example, you don't need to make one man the "wife" and feminized him to the extreme and fit him in a traditional "woman" role so the other man can be the big strong masculine manly man. they can both be masculine or both be feminine or both be both at the same time! they do NOT need to be gendered opposites to fit het roles. crazy, I know! it's like no one considers it a possibility! or sees how good it can be to have them be equals without gendered nonsense.
when there's a gay relationship, you have the perfect opportunity for the couple to stand on equal ground. they get to be equals who are just as strong and just as soft as each other. there's no faulty power dynamics where one is above the other (because let's face it, society unfortunately deems masculinity > femininity). one doesn't need to protect the other. they can protect themsleves, fight aide by side as equals. one doesn't do all the housework. they share that duty equally. one isn't weak and pretty, while they other strong and manly. they both are strong and pretty, or masculine and weak at the same time.
equal relationships are amazing and need to be explored more and appreciated. there can be more understanding and working together. i'm bad at explaining what I mean, but I prefer these equal relationships over forcing them into opposite roles to mirror het relationships, which are usually extremely unbalanced and unequal. especially because these not het relationships! so why must they look like one? they can and should look different! so why does literally every shipper and writer out there make them so het coded?
I don't understand why people do this. do they actually believe all romantic relationships must mimic het ones to exist and thrive and purposely force that on them? or have they genuinely just not fathamed that they can be different and dont need to follow the expected het standards?
I wonder, it feels like no one actually knows how non-het relationships are meant to be and how they could work, since het ones are always forced down our throats since birth. it becomes The Standard that everyone thinks they must follow. maybe it's all people know since they don't see any other possibilities. their preferred dynamics for their ships are what we are taught and nothing different, because they don't know it can be different. i also think people might be obsessed with that whole "opposites attract" trope. but that opposite doesn't have to be the traditional het-fueld feminine vs masculine or wife vs husband characteristics. it can be other personality things like one is loud and one is quiet, one is dumb and one is overly smart, one is rich and one poor, etc. it doesn't have to be masculine vs feminine!
BREAK OUT OF THE HET NORMS!!!!! TEAR DOWN HETERONORMATIVITY!!!!!!!!! FREE THE GAYS
(disclaimer, not saying masculine vs feminine ships are all bad/shouldn't be done ever. but it doesn't need to be 100% of the time either 😅 can't think of one ship people dont do this with lol)
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The way people will treat extremely new definitions for labels as the Only Acceptable Definition sometimes is fucking WILD
Anyways I'm a proud butch panagender (mix between pangender and agender) & genderfluid lesbian and ily all other lesbians who get shit for not fitting the newest box for what people expect lesbians to be <3
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the she/theys vs he/theys and wlw vs mlm posts are symptoms of a larger problem within the queer community 👍
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List 5 things that make you happy, then put this in the askbox for the last 10 people who reblogged something from you! get to know your mutuals and followers ٩(ˊᗜˋ*)و
sounds interesting! ok ✨
(was quite tough to put just a few little things on a list like this kjkskks, but here it is)
5 things that make me happy — a list
Undertale
Flowey
condensed milk pudding
romance
art
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The fifty-seventh free, unedited chapter of my upcoming book, “The Heist at Cordia Aquarium” is now available on its website (or click here to read from the beginning).
Check. You're almost out of time.
Not quite running, Avery pumps her arms in the fastest walk her pajama pants will tolerate without catching under foot. Tendrils suffocate her from within: they wrap around her chest, crushing and writhing and demanding her attention. It was one detour. By request! Why does my brain have to be like this?
The Hall of Discovery winds in front of her; a slithering eel made of concrete, plaster, and carpet; lined with murky, unlit tanks on both sides. It'd be creepy if she didn't know what was inside every single one of them. As she passes, she can see shadows floating inside them — each unique in their own way.
Names pop to the forefront of her mind, as numerous as her footsteps: marsh periwinkles with their distinctive, conical shell; the bulbous eye sockets and long face of redlip blennies; writhing, wiggling masses of wandering nudibranchs.
Her mind wanders along with them. Her pace slows. I'll never keep the names of the sea slugs straight.
[...]
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^THIS^
Homophobes need to take fucking accountabilty.
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Little update on the aro dress I started making this month for myself.
Yesterday I’ve successfully sown together velvet and organza.
Ruffled organza.
On flat velvet.
Progress so far with that task: 1 pair of ruffled organza on flat velvet out of 8 finished.
There is also a tulle and velvet pair there but Imma do this last
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