#and then think about it in that context for a bit /lh

[fallofthecelestial]

Hey... what if the downside to "X can do everything" is that he can only do "everything" his believers want him to. He's such an enigma that we're literally just shooting in the dark BUT what we do know is that he definitely wants freedom (considering INERTIA was confirmed to be from his POV and that the lyrics matter a lot)

I think it's very safe to assume that the greater the number of followers, the greater the pressure a hero will be at the mercy of. So with that, the idea of being basically controlled by the masses because you're No. 1 is pretty terrifying, and it really makes me ruminate on the "You’ve got to believe that I am free" line. Honestly, I question the extent of his free will, because even though he isn't bound by contract, isn't bound by a company (at least as a hero.. *cough*) he has to be bound by the beliefs of the people more than everyone else. And you know... maybe, just maybe, that's exactly why he'd want to "kill this destiny" even at the cost of using less than heroic sources of power.

Plus on a similar note, assuming his mission being to attain freedom as a hero is at least somewhat close to the truth, it'd definitely have to be something that extends beyond him and to every other hero who has to suffer because of the circumstances of their powers, and the circumstances of them being corporate slaves with powers and pizzazz. Since from the lyrics we should also be able to discern that wanting to make a difference *is* his purpose (as a hero.)

(Also yall remember Zero.. the guy Mr. X glitches into in the OP who appeared in one of E-Soul's PVs with cult imagery. Who presumably got completely disfigured into That Thing because of them in the first place, against his own will. Who a lot of us theorise to be the previous No. 1 before our X. Yeah so once again assuming the guesses are at least semi correct, in their place I think most of us would also 1. shit their pants and 2. want to break free at any cost bc HAHA. You know... the most powerful hero of humanity is also the biggest threat to humanity~~)

Is is just me? Or is Hero X truly as powerful as the fandom make it out to be?

Okay, hear me out! I know it's a hot take. But there's so many theories of what Hero X's ability actually is; from time traveling, space bending, warping reality, 4th wall breaking, omniscience, omnipotency. All of them being absolute OP abilities that makes your eyes cross.

And while all those theories are valid, I began to wonder... is Hero X actually that much powerful... or are we led to believe that with the little information we have?

Think about it. We know him as the No. 1 hero, right? So by that admission, we automatically ended up coming up OP ability that would make sense for him to be at the top. But aren't we just assuming he is OP?

He's powerful, yes. The 6 minutes trailer has greatly established that. And his PV also hinted his follower to believe his omnipotent.

But that's a simple bias words from one person. What's to say that her words are misdirection. Like a magician who talks to the audience, planting ideas and preconception to make you believe in one thing instead of the other.

That we, the audience, are meant to both question and believe in the power of the enigmatic Hero X.

Just like how Nice was perceived to be the "perfect hero", but in reality he wasn't really perfect, wasn't he?

And let's just... let it sink in that what we, as a fandom, are collectively are doing is exactly what the citizens in the donghua must be feeling. Trying to rationalize and understanding his power from what they witnessed. Trying to understand who he is as a person, his values, and his ideals.

Like, the creative team is soooo cool to give Hero X as much info as the average people in the donghua. Helping us be more immersive in the world while hooking us with bait in every turn.

After all, the first two episodes is already a direct allegory for the toxic idol business. And accidentally or not, I'm sure there are audience of To Be Hero X who have been guilty of participating such culture, so of course it's reasonable to make the fandom understand why people would follow and trust in Hero X despite his enigmatic status.

We know only half a page about his character, and already he is amassing his fans.

URGH, I just love this meta-strategic marketing. The studio is COOKING!!!

[twistedwonderlandshenanigans]

More Random Headcanons About The TWST Cast As Kids

Reminder that I write these as if y'all have read my other HCs LMAO /lh if something seems off, it's probably because it has to do with my headcanons overlapping- I've linked a few for context if anyone would like them ^^. No TW, and please no chapter 7 spoilers ^^

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Heartslaybul

Riddle used to really badly want a key collection. Something something about hearing that every door is leading to an opportunity you can unlock if you work for it. Took it too literal as a little kid. Still thinks antique keys are cool as fuck

Trey used to have a fascination with ants because his mom was able to smell them, and of course, growing up in a bakery they would have been a bit of a concern. So sometimes he would just go and sit and watch an ant hill for hours, claiming that he was making sure none were getting in the shop but uh he was really just watching them

Despite his own accent, and the one his mum made him use, Cater would pick up other people's accent like a sponge when he was little; thankfully little kids thought it was cool, not that he was trying to offend them (haha also a psychological survival trait to try and blend in as quickly as possible in a new environment and since we know he moved around a lot---) (lol I actually forgot to make a post about this I've only yapped about it on DC)

Deuce used to love blowing and getting raspberries when he was little because he could feel them rather than hear them

When Ace was Little Little he stuck a toy cat up his nose, followed by a firetruck, followed by a fireman. Yes it took a hospital visit. Yes this is based on a clip I saw from house m.d Yes it was his brother who took him, shut up

Savannaclaw

Leona desensitized his hands when he was younger because his coping mechanism for frustration was physical training. He wanted to be the best general the royal army ever had and if he could feel no pain in his hands like his great great grandpa he would achieve that goal, at least in his mind. (He would fist fight trees basically, after he was done his basic training with the current general)

Ruggie didn't speak to anyone except his grandma until he was about 5/6 years old; mostly because he had been taught that listening is less likely to get you in the bad sort of trouble than talking would, especially in the neighbourhood he grew up in

Jack used to sleep on his dad's tail, to the point he COULDN'T fall asleep unless he was hugging his dad's tail. Luckily his dad doesn't get excited too easily but this lasted until he was about 7 years old

Octavinelle

Azul loved getting ready with his mum in the morning, and before she had to go to work. He would often come to her with like a strand of seaweed or clams or coral so she could give him a cute hairstyle. He wouldn't be caught dead wearing them to school unfortunately, but he loved those moments with his mom.

Floyd used to collect shark teeth off the sea floor, at least. for a short time. After The Incident he decided to collect sand dollars instead to slide under Jade's 'door' while he was recovering

Jade first liked mushrooms because he thought the tops of them looked a little bit like sand dollars :) but also once he recovered he started collecting shark teeth from the sea floor and made a knife out of one as a silent thank you to Floyd - not because he thought he needed it, but just because it looked cool

Scarabia

Kalim used to have a horrible skin picking and nail biting habit; not out of anxiety but pure boredom from living under highly protected circumstances for a little while (also iykyk what this lead to)

Jamil had a mild allergy to mango, but still ate it anyways because he thought the tingly feeling was normal for mango.

Pomefiore

Vil used to make his barbies their own outfits; he would request fabric scraps from his designers to do so so they could match, and often brought a matching barbie with him onto sets and talk shows

Rook had bangs so long they covered his eyes; without having anyone reliable to ask for help, he used to use mud to slick it back out of his face

Epel 'refused' to lose any of his teeth in any other way than by biting an apple. Tooth fell out at school? He kept it a secret until lunch and put the tooth In His Apple. Tooth fell out at home? He would deny it, run to the orchard and grab an apple just to stick his tooth in it. Even now he says he lost all his teeth by biting an apple OTL

Ignihyde

Idia (as an only child) used to make 'potions' out of his moms bathroom supplies BUT they were always organized by use. So skincare products would get mixed together, hair products would get mixed together, dental products would get mixed together because in his mind, when his parents put everything together, it made the product better than it did originally

Ortho used to hide in vents OTL he would unscrew vents (which he did so by stealing his moms multitool on her belt) crawl inside and hold the vent cover in place until he could pop out and scare someone (usually his dad)

Diasomnia

Malleus was really bad at singing, I mean just awful. Like birds are dropping from the sky, magic mirrors want to shatter themselves and Lilia would even make him stop by offering him ice cream :skull: he did get voice lessons, but he was very huffy about them because he 'didnt need to get better if he was already the best'

Lilia as a teen would make dolls for fae orphans, but never told anybody about it out of embarrassment

Silver would often fall asleep with an animal he somehow managed to smuggle into the cabin from outside. If Lilia ever tried to take it, (even for the benefit of the animal), Silver would pull the biggest saddest puppy dog eyes you ever did see and Lilia had no military training for that OTL

Sebek used to eat his food by twisting his head and shaking his arms in opposite directions to tear it apart because of Croco instincts (can't deathroll, can try though).

Faculty

Crowley once got his entire fist stuck in his mouth

All of the cats Trein had growing up were named after famous religious figures that he grew up with

Crewel used to restore cars a lot, before he picked up his more glam style. His first car was a 1972 Chevy Nova that he managed to buy and soupe up after working two summer jobs since he was 14.

Vargas had a highschool sweetheart that he never got the chance to confess to. He still has the love letter in a shoebox somewhere. (hopeless romantic Vargas is so canon to me guys you don't understand)

Sam has never lost a card game since he was 9. His dad used to show him allllll the ways to cheat and fudge the deck in his favour, but also developed his skill. As of right now he's also banned from the local casino

Others

Che'nya was legally missing for 48 hours as a child because he went invisible, and decided the back of an unmarked van and a bunch of weird dudes acting strangely was paw-fect for an adventure. He ended up making them think their house was haunted before finding his way back home completely unharmed. The police and his parents didn't notice he was home until he asked for help opening a yogurt tube OTL

Jack Hearts had an obsession with learning how to fly, and accidentally incited panic in his parents several times after thinking a pile of leaves would be enough to cushion his jump from the second story of their house.

Falena had a really bad phase of making a popping noise as a stim. It had started off as a joke to mildly annoy Leona but he ended up annoying himself too

Cheka likes wearing his moms heels because he feels really small and thinks he should be taller

Najma had a HUGE sweet tooth. Sometimes, if Jamil could manage it, he would slip desserts from Kalim's testing tray (after he had tested them) to her and promise to learn to make them if she really enjoyed them. Also, unlike her brother, Najma has always been a disaster in the kitchen

Marja used to tap all sorts of trees to make syrups out of them. During the off season for apples, she would make lollipops out of them to sell door to door to neighbours. She was trying to save up for a dog (a border collie specifically)

Mama Shroud used to go scuba diving regularly (she's sooo Aussie in my head) and wanted to become a marine biologist before she really discovered engineering; which only happened when she had to think on the fly for one of her friends air tanks malfunctioning.

Papa Shroud loved to annoy his big sister LMAO he loved fake crying to get her in trouble and make her play with him

Ms. Hades (who I HC as Papa Shroud's sister) used to love doing her makeup, and would sometimes wrangle her younger brother into being her guinea pig for new styles

Maleanor used to flirt by asking other noble boys if they wanted to butt heads like rams with her OTL for some reason they all said no…

Baul was in cello lessons when he was little. He hated them. His mother commissioned a piece to have his disgruntled face and little outfit immortalized forever

Rollo used to buy little oils/perfumes so he and his brother could have the same smell on their respective handkerchiefs. His brother's favourite was sandalwood.

OCS

Vizzie loved pomegranates because she thought they made her look like a vampire when she ate them

Xenos used to throw fish at people from under the water when he was bored

Aspen would go up to random people to show them how he was double jointed in the wrists OTL

Danya's comfort item was his late father's ushanka

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If you want to read more about how I hc their families, I have two headcanon posts here and here and specifically about their guardians here

If you want some more Kid Silliness, I've got hcs here and here ANNND here

If you want to check out something else, I've got my masterlist here

And if you made it all the way here, thank you for reading!!

----------------------------------------------------

Tag List (lmk if you'd like to be added/removed): @theleechyskrunkly @sunsmilu @tixdixl @nemisisnemi @starry-night-rose @thehollowwriter @distant-velleity @elenauaurs @galacticstationsblog @my-cursed-brain @fluffle-writes

[the-s1lly-corner]

Since you said spam is okay for now I'll send the other half of this after :3

Slashers x reader who calls everything they do cute! They can be covered in blood and gore but the reader will still call them cute!

Various Slashers x reader who always calls them cute

God I love white cheddar snacks which is weird because I dont like eating straight up cheese

Characters: Jason, Bubba, Michael

Notes: reader is GN, reader is.... a little silly... not silly funny but definitely silly

CWs: canon typical violence and death

JASON

when its during the normal day to day life? he loves it! truly he does! but.... when hes covered in blood, he doesnt quite know how to feel... you think hes cute like this? really?

he does something that warrants a compliment but isnt exactly cute- such as chopping wood or lifting something heavy or just generally doing non-killing work around the place... gives a slight pause after you call him cute

it does make him feel nice about himself, not just because you think hes visually cute! you think he acts cute, too, and thats actually really assuring for him because he knows hes a big scary dude! hes not the most gentle and hes hyper aware of the fact he can accidentally kill you, hes not exactly used to tenderly handling another human being!

you dont find him intimidating is what he means!

BUBBA

you can see his ears go bright red when you call him cute while he carves up some meat for later... his knuckles turn white as he grips the chainsaw and he just... ehehehe...

thinks about it for a long long time, he never gets used to it no matter how many times you call him cute. definitely the type to kick his feet just a little bit while hes sitting down

grips his apron if you call him that while his hands are empty- shifts the material around in his hands as his mouth moves and curls... he never says anything but you know hes thinking nice things

doesnt care what the context is he will get happy anytime you call him it, he could be in the middle of disemboweling someone and you will give him pause

MICHEAL

confused head tilt. him? cute? yeah sure... hes already letting you stay alive and get close to him, why not go ahead and poke the bear!/hj/lh

never really addresses it and he doesnt seem to feel much way about it outside of the initial confusion, at least hes not stopping you or growing cold towards you

you catch him washing blood off of himself and he just blankly stares at you as you tell him hes a cutie pie

that being said he does dislike being called a cutie patootie. he doesnt hurt you but the stare he gives you hits different, and if you try again he simply.. puts his hand on your mouth

[saltedcaramelchaos]

mkay So. I've been listening to the riptide rolleds and it took until like. episode 40? for the Jay-was-a-double-agent thing to come up? And the way Condi was talking about it just put all of that WAY more into context for me, like-

I absolutely love Jay with all my heart, but I kinda assumed he was still figuring out how to play her or something until later in the campaign? 'Cause like, she definitely gets a lot less afraid of being herself after episode 53, and that's when she finally starts definitively bonding with the crew? idk i just ran with jay feeling a little bit empty until about episode 40. definitely should have put it together I know

But then in the rolled Condi said smth like "yeah this navy attack was jay's way out if she wanted. i was there on the front of the ship just thinking about how i could ram it into the other one. this could have gone veryy differently"

AND I FINALLY REALIZED

JAY'S NOT LESS DEFINED IN THE EARLY CAMPAIGN OR ANYTHING LIKE THAT

SHE'S CONSTANTLY HAVING THAT INTERNAL DEBATE

SHE'S NOT BEING HERSELF BECAUSE SHE'S UNDERCOVER AND SHE DOESN'T WANT TO GET ATTACHED

Condi Condifiction has been playing 4D chess this whole time, and he's had us* in check since day one. Good land.

*(or at least me lol, im stupid apparently /lh)

[pullupinarari]

Lean your weight on me [LH]

1. Nobody’s listening to me

Summary: a 9 chapter series where you are a famous singer, living the career of your dreams. But your chaotic schedule makes your body give in, making you lose your memory and forget (almost) everything.

Authors note: hiiii girlies! This is chapter 1 of 9 that I have planned for this series! I love this idea so much, I stayed up until 3 am writing it 😭 I hope you babes enjoy this, this chapter is for pure context only, and Lewis will obviously play a huge part in the following ones. Mwah mwah 🩷

Warnings: some mental health issues being neglected , exhaustion, desperation, references to taking medication, passing out, plus this is barely proofread

wc: 3983 - English is not my first language! Feedback is always appreciated

all chapters here

Interviews, photoshoots, studio sessions, sound check, performance, concert, another interview, another performance, taking pictures with the fans, going to bed late and waking up early to do it all over again. And again, and again, and again.

You’re thankful for the life you have, you really are. You are living your dream, having the career that you always prayed for.

But being famous is both a blessing and a curse. It’s a life changing experience to be able to share your art with the world, to sing your heart out every night and pour your feelings out there to a crowd who seems to hug you momentarily while singing along to every single word you get out. But the hate, the comments, the pressure from the media, the rumours, are the dark side of it.

The current tour for your most recent album is kicking your ass. Your anxiety has been through the roof, your chaotic schedule leaves you very little time to breathe, let alone to get some rest. You don’t have time to stop, to relax, and when you do, you lay your head on the pillow and your body doesn’t shut down. You can’t sleep. Your mind rushes, thinking about the next show, the new songs, the music videos you have to record, all the interviews you have scheduled - you can’t stop. And it’s been like this for the past weeks - maybe even months.

You’ve been touring the world for four months now, and it’s fun, of course it is. Everyone would give everything to have your life, but it’s hard to cope when you’re exhausted - both physically and mentally. And, on top of that, the media won’t leave you alone. At first, they would write all about your tour, your new songs, your sold out arenas. But a few weeks after, they caught you going out with a male artist that you really admire, getting in touch with him so you two could feat on a future track that you’ve been thinking about for weeks now.

But the paparazzis only need a picture. And they just need to see you with that guy at a cafe in Italy - where you and him were both performing around the same time. And that’s all it takes for your “secret encounter” to be all over the headlines, the next morning.

You don’t watch the news, you don’t read comments, you don’t read headlines. Your body gave in at around 5 am, and you managed to get some sleep during four hours. You wake up with a video call from your husband, Lewis, startling you from your sleep. Still, his name on your screen makes you smile - you wouldn’t mind lose all your sleep hours to talk to him.

“Good morning, my love” - he says, the soft british accent going straight to your ears, making you smile at his kind words.

He looks relaxed, happy and full of serotonin. You can tell that he already showered after his morning run and had breakfast, you know his routine all too well. You are a night owl and Lewis is a morning sunshine, it’s always been like this - opposites really attract themselves.

Lewis wanted to see you, he knew all too well that he would be calling to a sleepy wife, but he didn’t had much free time today, so he wanted to take the risk and call you in the morning, so you two could talk for a bit.

You told him all about your latest shows and interviews, and he talks about the upcoming GP and his plans for the day. Lewis has a topic in mind that he really wants to approach, but he doesn’t want to upset you in any way, knowing that you have been stressed enough already with the little rest you’ve been having lately.

“Babe…” - he starts. “You haven’t checked your phone today, have you?” - your husband asks you, his tone sounding careful, like he doesn’t want to step on an egg by accident.

“No, I was sleeping. Why? Did something happened that I’m missing?” - you question him back, your eyebrows glued together in confusion.

He hesitates for a moment, thinking about if he should go ahead and talk about the picture or if he should just drop it, for your own sake. But he doesn’t want to think about that all day, he doesn’t want to have a single doubt about it, he wants to hear the truth from you.

“There’s this picture all over the internet, of you and a guy at a cafe, supposedly from yesterday? Some rumours are spreading, I just wanted to ask you if there’s anything I should know?” - he asks, his tone is sweet, he doesn’t mean to point a finger at you.

You blink twice at his words, the lack of rest and the fact that you had just woke up are not helping your mind right now and you feel slow.

“Ehm, not really? Do you remember that artist that I told you about a few weeks ago? The one I really wanted to collaborate with? Our managers finally helped us meeting, since we were both playing here this week. So we went to this cafe and talked about our ideas for the song, that was basically it” - you tell him the truth, watching his face as he carefully listened to you.

“Oh and by the way, his name is George and he’s gay. So, there’s nothing for you to be worried about” - you add, your mind already trying to unveil what’s going through his own.

Lewis smiles, his eyes melting by looking at the love of his life. He knew there wasn’t anything for him to worry about, he trusts you with his entire heart and life, he could never doubt you.

“Did you managed to get some sleep last night, my love?” - he questions, actually worried about you and the lack of rest that you’ve been complaining about for the past weeks.

You sigh. “I fell asleep at like, 5 am, I guess? And now it’s 9 am, so, four hours of sleep, yayyy” - you try to fake some happiness, making Lewis snort at your irony. In spite of it, he’s still concerned about your health and he wishes he could do something to help you sleep for a while and recharge your energies.

And it’s like you can read his mind, like you could actually see the engines in his brain working, searching for solutions to your problem.

“I’m thinking about trying these new sleeping pills and see if they can help me with my sleeping schedule” - you say, half informing him, half asking for his opinion on it.

Lewis raises an eyebrow at your words, not surprising you at all. You know how he feels about this type of medication, but he also feels unable to come up with a better idea. So he sighs - “just talk to the doctor about it first, please” - he asks you.

“I will, I promise. I don’t think I can take another row of doing shows, interviews, performances and everything without getting some decent sleep” - you admit. “These last few weeks have been really rough” - you reveal, your voice croaking a bit, feeling a knot forming on your throat already, just at the thought of everything that’s been going on lately.

Little did you knew that things would get worse. The picture of you and George keeps spreading through the internet, rumours grow bigger and bigger, and as you’re walking from your hotel to the venue where you’re playing tonight, some journalists stalk you to get some answers from you.

“Y/N, is it true that you’re going out with the new breaking through artist, George Lawson?”

“Where do you and Lewis Hamilton stand after all this?”

“Are you two getting divorced?”

“Do you feel guilty after publicly cheating on your husband?”

Multiple questions that keep you awake at night. The stinging feeling in your chest pounds like drums, making it impossible for you to fall asleep. It hurts to breathe, your body feels tingly and sore, and you find yourself crying your eyes out to all of the stupid rumours surrounding yours and your husband’s name. Lewis is focused in fighting for the championship, he can’t be distracted by this type of nonsense, and it’s all because of you.

Your anxiety plays tricks on your mind, making you firmly think about how Lewis didn’t believed your explanation when he asked about George. Maybe he pretended that he believed you, but he doesn’t? What if he suspects that you’re actually cheating on him? You know you would never do that to him, he’s the love of your life, and after six years of a happy and solid marriage, you’re scared that you might lose his trust.

And things keep going downhill. The meds don’t help you sleep at all, they just make your mind feel blank, mixing your anxiety with the weird sensation of not feeling anything at all.

“The media keeps talking shit” - you say to Lewis over the phone, silently crying and praying that he wouldn’t notice it.

“Just ignore it, love. You know that all they do is lie. You’re stronger than that, it’s just some stupid rumours. Don’t worry about it” - he says to you, trying to sound calm but you know he’s in a rush, hearing how his team has called his name some times already. “I have to go, my love. I’ll call you back as soon as I can, okay?” - he ends the call before you can even reply.

Another night goes by and you get no rest at all. Instead, you spend hours scrolling through instagram, twitter, reading comments, rumours, theories. And every single word that you read, goes straight to your heart, straight to your mind, reminding you that maybe you’re not that good. Maybe you’re not deserving of everything you’ve got. Maybe you’re not deserving of your husband, of your career, of all the prizes that you’ve won so far.

Your sobs sound muffled against the pillow, your body lying alone on a cold bed, one that isn’t yours, that doesn’t feel familiar. It’s been a while since you’ve had some sense of familiarity inside of you. You miss your family, your house, your dog, your husband’s embrace, your friends. Every day, you land in a new city, where you don’t know anything, and every night, you lay on a new bed, one where you don’t feel like you belong to.

And you don’t even recognise yourself anymore. The dark bags under your eyes from the lack of sleep, the swollen face from all the crying, your body running on no energy at all - and still, you’re forced to put on a show every night, almost making you feel like you’re not human anymore, like you’re running on gasoline.

Your fans have noticed that you’re not okay, that you’re not as happy, as energetic and excited as you used to be anymore. You know some people worry about you, you worry about yourself too, and at this point, you don’t know what to do anymore to help yourself. It’s ironic how your music has saved so many lives, but you can’t seem to save yourself.

There are a lot of people counting on you, you don’t want to let anyone down. You have your family, your managers, crew, team, fans, band - that just adds more pressure on your shoulders, forcing you to put on a smile on your face and pretend to be okay.

“I love you so much, my love. Good luck at the concert” - you read Lewis’ message before going on stage. Some lies do sound sweet, your mind keeps telling you that Lewis doesn’t trust you anymore, that he’s lying when he says that he loves you.

More pictures of you outside of your hotel end up online, only for people to comment on your physical appearance now.

“Why does she look like a panda? Someone cover those dark bags for her please”

“Is that bloating or is she actually pregnant?”

“Pregnant of who? It’s been a while since her and Lewis have been together”

“Maybe it was that George guy?”

Your head hurts from all the crying, your chest hurts from sobbing so hard. You feel worthless, you just desperately want it all to stop. You want people to shut up, you want the world to stop, the lights to shut down, you don’t want to do any of this anymore.

“Can we cancel tonight’s concert? I don’t feel well” - you say to your manager, hoping you can get a break from the spotlight and the judgement looks.

You get a sigh in response. “Y/N, this is an important festival. We are talking 60 thousand tickets sold, more than 400 thousand impressions that we can get from this show alone. This is a really important one” - he tells you in an impatient manner. You gulp. You can’t let them down, so you try your best to prepare yourself, once again.

You have the afternoon off, and you think that maybe you can take some medicine and try to take a nap, maybe that will make you feel better.

“One pill hasn’t been working, might as well just double the dose and see if it helps” - you innocently think. Two pills in and still, no sleep on your free time.

You toss and turn in bed, tiring your body even more, your mind feeling electric with a million different thoughts.

So you decide to call Lewis before you have to start getting ready for the concert. He picks up the video call, his bright eyes and kind smile in full display on your phone. You immediately feel fragile and small, some tears forming in your eyes as you just smile at him in silence.

“My love, are you crying?” - he worriedly asks. You try to shrug it off, not wanting him to worry about you.

“I just miss you, that’s all” - you half lie. Of course you miss him, but that’s not all. You want to quit this chaotic life, you want to be at peace. You want to actually have some time for yourself, you want to see your family, you want to go back to therapy, you want to feel like yourself again.

Lewis gives you a sympathetic look. “Only four more shows to go until you have some days off, my love. And I’ll meet you in Spain so we can enjoy some time together, just the two of us” - he says cheekily, oh how you love him so dearly.

“I love you, I sincerely love you with all my heart, Lewis” - you say, praying that he sees through you like he always does, so he can see how honest you are.

“I love you even more, my love. You’re my whole heart, beating out of my chest” - he sends you a kiss through the phone, warming your heart a little bit more.

“Are you okay, Y/N?” - your husband asks you, and you know he truly wants to know how you are actually doing lately.

But it’s pointless to explain, no one seems to get it. You know he cares about you, but you don’t want him to worry about the wrong things when he’s so close to wining the championship - you know how that is so important to him.

“I am okay, babe. If I could just get a full night of sleep, everything would be perfect” - you lie. You sense that he doesn’t really believe you, he might have notice that you’ve been more off than usual, but you hope that he shrugs it off. It would be way harder to hide it from him if you were together, and by the phone, everything looks better than it does in reality.

“Maybe you should see a better doctor to talk about your insomnia, my love. A doctor that can actually help you, you know? Since you’ve been taking those pills and they don’t help you at all” - Lewis adds, trying his best to help.

Yeah, maybe. Maybe you should see another doctor, maybe you should call your therapist, maybe you should try and go see a witch - it’s hard to realise what’s the biggest problem right now, while you have so much on your plate. Your life is hectic, nothing brings you joy anymore, you are not in your safe space, you don’t have anyone that cares about you by your side during this difficult time. It’s insane how you are always surrounded by thousands of people every night, and yet, you’ve never felt so alone in your entire life.

Desperation has reached your bones, and if people can’t understand your physical signs, maybe they can understand how much you’re struggling right now, through your songs? So tonight you decided to play a new song that you wrote last week, addressing all the chaos that has been painting your mind and life. You want people to listen to you, to what you actually have to say.

As you sing your heart out to that new melody, begging for someone to help you, to listen to you and to support you, the tears don’t stop falling down your face, illuminating your eyes, filled with darkness and emptiness. Your heart aches, and you see the crowd crying, shocked at what they’re hearing.

You pray that there’s still a string of hope, people might understand your side through your new song, such a personal and raw cry for help - but they don’t. Back at your hotel room, you check what everyone is saying online.

“Omg she’s a genius”

“This is such a hit”

“She needs to release this asap, I am crying she’s so brave”

No one actually understands that this is how you feel now. That you need to stop, you need help. And it’s just another cry for help that gets ignored by everyone.

You give up, your body is running on nothing, you don’t even feel the passion in your veins anymore. You feel beaten up, like everyone has gotten the best of you, there’s nothing you can do anymore, you’re just a puppet in everyone’s hands.

After a day off - spent in bed, crying - you land in Switzerland for the same routine as always.

You feel dizzy, weak - probably because you haven’t eaten much lately either. Your lack of energy is so glaring, that you do most of your shows sitting down already. You don’t have the energy to spend two hours on your feet, you don’t have the energy to dance, to walk through the stage. You can’t even feel your body most of the time now. So it’s fine, you’re going to sit down on your piano and sing, like you do every night.

You feel weird, more than usual. You feel like you’ve been dissociating the entire time today, like your soul is slowly leaving your body. Your crew isn’t helping at all, not caring about your complaints, just encouraging you to get this show over with.

And you get up there, but the bright lights are too much for you, making your eyes sting, your head hurting even more. You manage to go through the first three songs, pushing your body to its limit - there must be a point of no return, after all this.

Your mouth feels dry, and you get up to get some water. Your body feels sore and weak, and it’s like you’re seeing stars for a second, before everything turns pitch black.

No one can really understand what happened, but now you’re being rushed to the nearest hospital, your body lying on the gurney, the sirens ringing as your manager looks at you, passed out, looking so debilitated and pale.

You open your eyes slowly, you don’t know where you are. You look around, and the room feels very odd to you. You look at your hands, seeing some IV’s and needles on your body. You take a breath, blinking a few times, hoping the room would feel more familiar by the second. But it doesn’t. And when people see you waking up, they rush to you.

“Y/N, oh my god! Are you okay? How are you feeling?”

“Thank god you wake up, you blacked out for hours! We were so worried”

A big group of people tells you. Your heart beats faster and faster, you don’t know who they are, but they seem to know you very well. Yet, you feel scared and alone.

“Wh- Who are all of you?” - you ask, afraid of their reaction.

They look at each other’s faces, then look back at you.

“You don’t remember us?” - they ask you, you simply shake your head. And before you could say a word, a team of doctors is rushing to your side, making you a bunch of questions and making you tests and exams.

Lewis is in a meeting with his team when he gets the call from your manager.

“Hello?” - he answers the phone, finding it weird that your manager is calling him.

“Lewis, something really bad happened. Y/N passed out on stage and we rushed her to the hospital, but she doesn’t remember anyone or anything. She lost her memory” - and that’s everything Lewis needs to know before he’s getting up from his chair and leaving his meeting.

“I’ll fly there right now” - he says, hurrying to be at your side as soon as possible.

Lewis is shaking, anxious, confused. He never worried so much about anything in his life as he does about you. And knowing that you’re in the hospital, unable to remember a single thing, rips the air from out of his lungs. He can’t stop his mind now. Could you possibly remember him? Is this just something temporary? Will you actually forget everything and never get your old memories back? What is he going to do?

What if you look at him and don’t feel love inside of your heart anymore? What if the new you, your blank mind decides that he’s the not the one for you? It’s like your demons departed from your body and landed on his, invading his system and immediately corrupting his mind.

And what if you turn into a new person that he doesn’t recognise? What if this accident makes both of you realise that you’re not meant to be together anymore? Lewis’ love for you is stronger than anything else in this world, but now he’s afraid that love would only exist on his end, scared of not receiving that same feeling of belonging from your side. His mind fills with questions and fears, as his body feels incredibly electric with anxiety, making him pick his nails and bounce his legs non-stop to try and shake some of that electricity off his body.

After almost two agonising hours of flying from Hungary to Switzerland, his jet lands, and when he finally gets to the hospital, he decides to speak to your team first. His heart is in his hands as they fill him in on everything that happened, the doctors confirming that you’ve lost your entire memory, leaving you with a blank mind. He prepares himself to walk inside your room, shaking and nervous to see your current state. The thought of you not remembering him at all is like a kick in the stomach.

When he sees you, his heart breaks. The sight of you kills him, looking so down, lying there emotionless, empty, with a scared and fragile look on your face. He takes a few steps towards you, and you turn your face to look at him, locking eyes with Lewis, making him almost fall to his knees at how deep you stare at his features.

“Lewis?” - you say, your voice croaking and tears swelling in your eyes.

[iri-desky]

An ALNST Dungeons and Dragons AU?

Howdy! So I mentioned trying to make an alnst fantasy au on a previous post. To be more specific, I thought I'd try to make a DND style au!

Although before I get into the details of it, I thought I'd establish the classes of the characters first and foremost. That's what this whole post is about. Please note that this is just a draft and big idea dump, as well as test of how well these classes fit each character...aaaand how well other people think each class I chose fits each character.

In other words, if you think some other class or subclass fits better, feel free to speak your mind. I'm actively looking for a bit of criticism on these choices.

Mizi - Paladin, oath of redemption OR oath of the ancients. Mostly because of the "belief that God is human" speech and uplifting, positive nature. And how I think that Mizi should be seen in armor (/lh). I also think it'd be ironic for her and Ivan to be best friends while she's a Paladin and Ivan's a warlock. I'm very unsure about this one, though-- she's probably the one I'm struggling with most. An exchange I've had with @mirrorcatcreditcard also is making me consider a Monk or Rogue, though in general I'm trying to give her a class with a good dexterity. If I do end up giving her Paladin as a class, I chose the subclasses I did to give her a less "smite-y, all who defy me must die" flavor and more of a "starry eyed idealist hero" flavor.

Sua - Cleric, Life Domain. Mostly because I think it'd be funny as hell for the most reserved and secretly temperamental one to be given the responsibility of healing the party. She gives the vibes of any cleric-- gentle and elegant on the outside but secretly cursing the world and everyone else in this stupid party on the inside. Except Mizi. She's an angel and we're glad she's here. I also wanna see her deny healing to Ivan at least once. Also, Sua has angel symbolism, so I had to go through with that in the classes.

Hyuna - Rogue, Swashbuckler subclass OR Fighter, monster hunter subclass (or gunslinger). I think it's pretty obvious that a rogue really fits Hyuna, and I think it'd be neat to continue her "outlaw" thing in this universe, just in a different context. Swashbuckler is so she's still high energy and in the thick of things. That said, a fighter can fit just as well given their versatility and spirit-- being a fighter doesn't necessarily have to be "basic". She could be a monster hunter subclass (inspired by her destruction of the aliens in the original series) or even a gunslinger subclass. A champion could work as well.

Till - Bard, college of lore. Despite how the original series is music based, I feel like he's the only character that I can see being a bard outside of the context of alnst just because of his creative genius. He's an artist at heart, and I wanted to reflect that. I don't see him being too flamboyant of a bard, of course, but I feel like his excitement and his genuine love for what he makes might start to bleed into a crowd when he's, yknow, not being judged by thousands of aliens and instead being watched by fellow humans. My choice of the college of lore is especially inspired by his drawings in the Io comic and desire for a better world while knowing what the natural world used to be. It's also come to my attention after an exchange with @nilladrawsstuff that a healer Till that complains about having to heal everyone but still expresses genuine concern would be a neat idea--While I don't think a pure healer Till would be too in character, Bards CAN function as healers and I can see Till being a jack of all trades. That's just what Till is in Canon--a jack of all trades. I want to reflect that in this au with his class.

Ivan - Warlock, with Unsha as his patron, Great Old One subclass (because squid). Unsha gives enough cthutulu vibes for this to make sense-- furthermore, I feel like Ivan's detached and transactional realationship with Unsha makes this make even more sense. I also wanted Ivan's class and subclass to reflect his intelligent but somewhat distant nature, with the theme of "unfathomability" being something that really fits him. The class parallels Luka, as well, a character that Ivan is known to reflect. Hexblade could work as a subclass as well, although I'm leaning towards The Great Old One. Tbh, I'm not too sure about this one, although Warlock Ivan definitely goes hard in my book.

Luka - Sorcerer, Aberrant Mind. He's got the vibes. Luka was the one I figured out first, actually, simply because he screams sorcerer; Annoyingly dazzling man with his powers handed to him (no offense to Sorcerer mains at all, yes offense to Luka /j [jk, we love Luka in this house. I just like bullying him /lh]). That bitch did NOT need to research for that or beg for a thing. Also, a sorcerer's main stat is charisma, so... yeah. The inherently mysterious nature of Aberrant Mind also gives me huge Luka vibes, hence my choice.

Anyway, that's all. Again, if you have any criticisms, comments, or better ideas, PLEASE do no hesitate to tell me. 👍🏽 This is a sapling of an idea so far and I need your help for it to grow!

( ahaha pls don't let this flop... I've been working on this post for over an hour )

(Tagging people who I know might be interested in this / were present back in the previous post below the cut)

@junebluues @awaggaa @mirrorcatcreditcard @ravelroses @nilladrawsstuff @kingofanemptyworld

[king-candybug-backup]

Hi you seem rlly cool 🙏 (that’s unrelated but whatver EHEM) Everyone knows the sequel to Wreck it Ralph could’ve been better, but what do you think of the “King Candy/Turbo is hiding on the internet” theory???

And Optional: How would have written for him in the sequel??

(Hopefully this isn’t too much eheueueueue)

(ˊᗜˋ*)

AW THANKS 😭 I'm actually an awkward little turd though, I just scream a lot lmfao /lh

I DO LIKE THAT THEORY AND THINK IT WOULD'VE MADE FOR A BETTER SEQUEL (them remembering Turbo exists AT ALL or any sense of logic in the first place would have made for a better sequel GSFDXDHCVJBJN LIKE THE ENDING OF RBTI BASICALLY CONFIRMS BY THEIR OWN LOGIC THAT TURBO DIDN'T DIE AND NOBODY BATS AN EYE???? LOL. LMAO, EVEN.)

Tbh, I don't really know how I'd write him in the context of the sequel specifically, I'm kind of one-track-mind with my writing, so I'd probably just write him similarly to how I'm already writing him in my own fic, just, like... being his typical opportunistic slimeball self and trying to get one over on everybody around him. 😂 (Just, like... on the internet....... And probably a bit sneakier/less-outwardly-aggressive since he probably wouldn't be in Cy-bug form and would need to be more careful due to his lack of brute force to back himself up GFHJFDCHVJHBJ) I could definitely see him trying to tamper around with coding again since it worked pretty well for him last time. Maybe dabble around in viruses and stuff for funsies and figuring out good ways to wreak havoc on his enemies lol. IDK THOUGH I'M JUST RAMBLING AT RANDOM HERE GHFDCHGFVH (I'm pretty sure there's pictures of Turbo's graffiti face or something in some of the RBTI concept art, I vaguely remember some discussion around that and him potentially being, like, some dark-web-virus kind of thing, but yeah idk 😂)

Tbh this comic and also @cannedbabs's RBTI rewrite posts are GREAT fun when it comes to content about Turbo on the internet fghddsdfhcg SO WOULD HIGHLY RECOMMEND CHECKING THOSE OUT IF YOU HAVEN'T ALREADY!

[rorydrawsandwrites]

final opinions on the silly mr puzzles guy???? :3

He is Definitely a Guy Ever

Very tragic yet very dangerous. Delightfully theatrical and unhinged but if he were a real person I would NOT want him on the loose ever again his ass is dying in prison (if he even can)

Honestly I'm able to relate to the fact that he's such a critic hahah. I mean I agree with him professionals should have standards. So married to his own vision save for that one time that it's even messed things up for him on occasion. But he's definitely good at entertaining, seeing as he entertained me into liking him as a silly little guy despite all the war crimes. I'm sure that's what he would've wanted

Then again he still throws tantrums and stalks people and punches effigies and attempts mass murder and brainwashes people when things don't go his way and that's why he's a pathetic king. Like yass girl slay but also get yourself together

The shot with the "crane up" in the lowest point short as he lay in the trash can was satisfying for multiple reasons. Finally he's where he belongs /lh

I feel like I found this character at the right time because I've learned a little bit about filmmaking by now, camera movements and shot types and like the visual language of film, and it IS pretty fascinating stuff so I get his passion one hundred percent (also did you know that in the beginning of Creative Control the "who, what, when, where, why, and how" are the 5W + 1H that should be answered when delivering a piece of news. Like in press. Apparently it's also a general problem solving thing but I first learned about it in the context of news media. I felt so proud of myself for noticing)

I also like that he's eloquent and has only said fuck once, characters like that tend to be endearing to me. Also I get to use my purple prose vocabulary when thinking about their dialogue and possibly writing it down. I did already mention loving his VA, also loved his progressively growing collection of faces, and I think that twink of a man should be seductively grabbed by the waist at least once- wait who said that

On an slightly related note I can't see any potential for ships here with the main cast. I heard there was one with Mario? Uhh, welp. I don't see it. The only ship I'll ship is him and Firkász, she's already sucking on his staticky glass screen as we speak. Disgusting

I don't know what else to say tbh I think he rocked the fairy godmother fit. Silly ahh wings. He was such a pretty fairy

Anyway rest in containment Puzzles, genuine human connection could've fixed you. Also if you didn't treat people like toys 'till the very end. Your sadistic tendencies and stubborn disregard for your fellow beings made you all the more horrible and yet more tragic still, as you could've never even had what you most desperately needed. Because you couldn't change

[ember-owlet]

do you have any agere thoughts on the new eps? I’d love to hear them <333

thank you so much for asking firelight!! i'm assuming you mean arcane but if i'm mistaken please let me know! /lh /gen

rambles under the cut ˚ʚ♡ɞ˚ spoilers ahead for season 2 of arcane!!

i do have quite a bit of clips in the works to polish tonight before uploading tomorrow, so i hope it is something to look forward to!! but after everything the majority of the cast are vent regressors with different leans/dynamics,, especially vi, mel, and jinx give my girls a BREAK!!!

vi and jinx having to see their father be killed and resurrected on multiple occasions was so painful to watch,, like can we give them ONE stable paternal relationship pretty please /j

i am 100% convinced at this point that both jinx and vi are canonical regressors. i don't think i need to reiterate jinx/powder being a regressor since many people in the agere fandom have discussed it (and not mad about that in the slightest, i'm so glad to see it! if you firelights want to hear about my thoughts then feel free to send a flare! i'd be happy to share.) but seeing vi regress to her teenage self multiple times throughout the show was enough for me to slap the label on her as well.

niche agere opinion as well,, but can we appreciate heimerdinger in a cg role as well? specifically as a mentor? it was so comfy seeing him as a professor and being ekko's support line throughout the chaos. ((and guys i promise he's alright!! yordles are immortal <3))

i also have a bunch of ambessa content on the way,, can you blame me she was in her prime as the antagonist of season 2 and i loved every second of it,, like come on guys she literally called characters little one and child consistently she just IS a mama now.

and honestly,, i might be the only one but i am in dire need of regressor sevika content. like come on we have prime pickings here she has SO many baby moments,, not just a mama to me. she seems like the type to regress in private (and very unique take but i would like to think in headcanon and in a sfw context when she goes to the brothel she has a cg that she visits take care of her. she literally has the weight of zaun on her shoulders WHO'S TAKING CARE OF HER???). /lh /nm

[captain-sunshine-11]

What if Kevin was taken in by Wymack when Kayleigh Died?

I know this AU of sorts would be build upon a lot of false hope and a lot of fucking up on the Moriyama's part if their money and lawyers couldn't keep Kevin--especially with the Perfect Court bullshit--but this is for fun and I can do whatever I want forever /lh

This was my original post on this concept and has the context but the basic premise is at the top. Anyway! This is gonna be some random building off of what I already said/how I think this would go, so, onwards!

I can't find the age of Kevin when Kayleigh died, so forgive me if this is incorrect so for sake of ease I'll place Kevin at age 8 until further notice

At this point of Kevin's life he has already been taught that Exy is the only important thing, it is second to Nothing. He is going to be Court--a part of the Perfect Court--of course it was put into gentler words for a child to grasp and understand "oh, this is going to be the rest of my life."

When he returns to Palmetto with Wymack, he is still relatively full of grief for his mom and is overwhelmed with living with this man--who he has only met a select few times during Exy Events with his mom--so Kevin has a rough time adjusting

Wymack tries to give Kevin as much space as he can give a young child but they do end up clashing a couple times. Kevin's messed up emotional state and Wymack trying to also grieve Kayleigh leads to a couple tantrums (from both of them lol) because they have problems understanding each other

They are both incredibly stubborn so a month in, they have a small fight you can only have between a grown adult and an 8 year old that leads to them both giving each other the silent treatment. By 'both' I mean Kevin, and Wymack trying to initiate but failing miserably

It isn't until Wymack makes a dinner that Kevin doesn't like that he has another conniption and yells something like "I hate you, I hate you!! / I wish I never met you!!" and runs off that Wymack decides that something has got to give.

He lets Kevin sulk for a couple minutes in his room before going after him. He talks, and Kevin listens. He cannot even remember the fight that led to this, it was so childish, but Wymack has to retain that Kevin is a child. (This is his first time having a kid, man is struggling)

Wymack is able to instate a truce and Kevin admits that, "I just really miss her."

Wymack scoops the kid into a hug and all the tension from his body disappears as he also says, "I miss her too, Kevin."

From then on, things are easier. They still have small problems but are able to work things out better than before as they learn how to exist around each other

Wymack for a long time is afraid of messing things up beyond repair, and tries to go to Bee as often as he sees fit to ask for advice. Feelings of inadequacy in his medium sized apartment and raising a kid that is not his. The conversation he had with Kayleigh on if she was having his kid and her saying no replays in his head as he doubts himself over and over again.

But Abby comes over about a year into having Kevin with him, she seems to be in awe about something.

She has seen Kevin before, plenty of times actually when Kevin first arrived and meals needed to be made by a more responsible adult (ha.), so Wymack has no idea why Abby seems so awestruck while looking at Kevin--so he tells her to spit it out. And he isn't prepared for:

"He has your nose."

Kid's faces change all the time, and as Kevin gets older even if it is a year later, he gets a bit lankier and the soon-to-be nine year old becomes more comfortable

It breaks Wymack for a little bit, having that old hope rise up again in his chest--but he decides against a paternity test. He cannot have that hope crushed again if it comes out negative.

On Kevin, he goes to a normal elementary school. He had been homeschooled previously given how often Kayleigh and the Ravens had to be moved around. In the paraphrased words of Nora, she had a sport to spread around, and she was pretty damn successful

Like everything else had been, Kevin took an adjustment period to normal public school. There is so many kids and more stimuli than he is used to seeing in a school environment.

On his first day after school he tells Wymack that he doesn't want to go back. He wouldn't give a reason at first but after some needling from a Very Concerned Wymack thinking that his kid was being bullied--Kevin just says that it is too much. Everything there was too much.

So Wymack comes up with an ultimatum, created only because he knew how smart Kevin was with retaining information from subjects he enjoyed, saying that he had to attend the rest of the week of school. And if he didn't like it, then they could look back into homeschooling.

Kevin agreed if only to prove Wymack wrong, but he couldn't. He picked up a fondness for History and when he started re-saying his teacher's lesson on the Early Origins of South Carolina (simplified for a Fourth Grader) Wymack figured correctly that there was no prying him away from school anymore.

On Exy--it is a no brainer that Kevin wants to join the Exy team and he gets in with flying colors. But this also means he begs to go to practice after homework is done and on weekends. Wymack hates his life a little when Kevin wakes him up at 9:30 AM on a Saturday for the sake of Exy

Thats all for now, let me know if ya'll want more

[satanic-foxhole-court]

(Full TSC spoilers, as in to the end of the book) The contrast of Jeremy’s biggest concern is caring for his team, making sure his queer inner circle are healthy, okay, having fun and passing classes vs. Jeans biggest concern is the literal mafia debt, serious major trauma, PTSD and learning how to live again is just perfect.

It shows really beautifully in Jeremy’s approach to helping Jean. Jeremy seeks to know, to get Jean to open up and admit what happened. And hey it eventually works. But in comparison that never happened with Neil. The foxes knew to not pry and because Neil was able to integrate into the foxes without being an issue like Andrew is that was okay. There was more concessions, understanding and leaving things be.

I do wish for many reasons Jean stayed with the foxes if only because they fundamentally get it. But at the same time no it wouldn’t work, they’re pack bonded and Jean sees them as something he can’t be apart of.

A quote that stuck with me:

“That’s not fair,” Jeremy said, and when Jean opened his mouth to argue, added, “to you or us. For someone who seems so sure of what he deserves, you don’t seem to give any thought to what anyone else does. You’re forcing us to hurt you without giving us any say in the matter.”

And yeah that’s why it’s important to shove Jean more than one might with Neil or Andrew. Andrew is violently firm with his boundaries, Neil says he’s fine when he’s not but he can cope under high stress environments and has worked on accepting help. Even if that help is calling Andrew, running and exercise (fun fact exercise is a great ptsd trigger management tactic, peak the anxiety to bring it down through physical activity).

Jean doesn’t have boundaries, will not speak up at any point when something upsets him, puts himself in harms way constantly because he doesn’t have any self worth. Understandable given what he’s been through. And for Jeremy to feel he can help he seeks to know to understand - which isnt helpful! And that’s acknowledged at the end of the book!!! (Nora I love you)

Jeremy wants to put it into context, he wants so desperately to be told what’s going on, why Jean has this reactions, that it’s important to talk. But for someone who’s learned to stop biting back, to be quiet to have no harm come to them? That’s not going to happen easily. Jean does give ground and I really appreciate seeing him set boundaries too gosh. Him saying what he will and will not talk about, reaffirming that again and again throughout the book is perfect. And for Jeremy, Cat and Lalia to respect those boundaries too, or mostly. There are points when I think they shove a bit much but this book isn’t about perfect responses. It’s a queer household taking in an extremely traumatised person and learning how to support him while he learns how to exist.

Oh and also the power imbalance that exists accidentally by Jean not having context for what Jeremy, Cat and Lalia have been through too! He’s picked up there’s something but he’s always the one being pushed to talk about things, but he knows it’s not appropriate to pry about those things with them. It’s neat.

The coaches responses are interesting too. From the shoving Jean towards the water (I wanted to punch them omg /lh), to civil conversations, to showing Jean a Raven thing and just not understanding his response.

It’s nice to see how much the Trojan’s don’t understand, they don’t know how to respond, they have no idea what’s sensitive and what’s not. We love the foxes for how understanding they are and seeing a contrast of a privileged team is awesome to see.

I’m excited to see Jean and Bee’s sessions. Adore the book and Jean’s unhinged out of pocket self<3

[sunflowersoap]

Thoughts so far from revisiting the beginning of Omori, and the implications it has about Sunny:

The way, like other people pointed out, Kel is constantly poked fun of in headspace due to Sunnys jealousy, yet is also shown to be so so treasured by Sunny? The way in his dream he literally is shown to hide right next to Omori so he doesn't have to be alone. That's something Sunny thinks Kel would do. Which, very interesting and sweet to me! I wonder if Kel did something like that in real life and it meant a lot to Sunny.

The way Sunny invented a scene in his brain where he'd have to save Basil is very, *very* interesting in context. I wonder if it was an outlet for his guilt around wondering if Basil was okay, wondering if maybe if he's in danger. He invents a scenario where he rescues Basil and everything's okay. Also the way he is so forgiving of Boss mixed with how so many things in black space, which I will remind you *is Sunnys worst fears*, involve him trusting Omori way too much and leading to him dying horribly. In this, Boss would never hurt Basil, everyone's protective of Basil, everything's fine. But Boss is juuuust a little of that fear creeping in, I think. Also the aspect of Basil being hurt for something he didn't do in Omoris mind. Just a little bit of that fear sneaking in.

Basil telling Mari she's got everything under control, and Mari says "That's not true at all! It just seems that way from the outside!" when real world Mari was said to have very rarely ever shown what she was feeling. Aubrey says she only ever saw her cry once. So Sunny knew it was hard for her, saw her mess up and stress (ex: the fucking duet practice), and noted in his head everyone else thought she was perfect. I wonder if he resented her for it some way.

It's interesting how that scene of Basil being hurt for something (in sunnys mind) he didn't do and that scene of Mari admitting shes not perfect happened just before the truth starts to surface. I wonder if that was the tipping point, he started considering "Basil could be hurt for someone else's fuck up" and "Mari isn't perfect", and suddenly everything falls apart. That little slip and suddenly it's all up in flames. Very interesting how suddenly from this point on, Mari is made into a perfect angel.

There's more but I am exhausted /lh and need some rest, so! Will continue later.

[heya-moth]

I love Uprooted. And giving comfort characters trauma. Sooooooo…….

What if the reason Booker acts kind of like the “tired Mom” of the group, especially towards Bitsy, is because even before his Mom left his Dad she was kinda shitty? Like a bit neglectful even if it wasn’t on purpose. She just wasn’t there. So now he tries to be better than that. Along with that, he’s like this the most with Bitsy and it’s been confirmed she doesn’t have/remember her family at all. But he’s really like this with all his friends but still

Speaking of which, can we talk about the fact that Booker said he had practically no friends growing up???? He literally said “I didn’t really have any friends” or something similar in one of the recent episodes and I want context on this. Was it because he just didn’t want any or did no one like him? I NEED TO KNOW

Good job I don’t know how to respond /lh

Until now

Booker does absolutely seem like the tiered mom of the group and yeah, it’s probably trauma from his dad being a general bum even before his mom skipped town. Children can be horrible and so depending on when his mom left he could’ve not have friends because his mom left him and his dad’s a bum. Queue the bullying. Or a mixture of both being bullied (and when it finally ends) not wanting to have friends.

Personally I think before he befriended and groups with Grumley, Booker was very cold and mysterious (think the rouge stereotype but meaner) and Grumley softened him up enough so that the rest of the group could join and soften the raccoon even more

Idk lolol but goodness I thank you for this ask feel free to send more if you wish :3

XD

[that-foul-legacy-lover]

Hello

It is I

John-non

I apologize for my great absence

I have a gift for my misdeeds

The long awaited

Masktaglia angst

(You may have to go back and check the original au's context haha, it's been years, just search masktaglia on your profile)

(Also it's funny that I've apparently rambled to you and explained masktaglia *twice* in my timeline of knowing you lol)

Childe having his mask knocked off of his body in a fight, either purely because he was distracted or because keeping the fight from turning bad was literally all he could do in what time he was afforded. And suddenly his body is gone, it goes limp, because the soul is not there, it's in the mask that's been tossed aside, and now it's *gone*, and Childe is out of range. Not even a chance to switch to Foul Legacy, though he certainly wanted to try.

The body that gets brought back is horrifying enough, because it's *definitely* not in a good state, but you know he's survived bad things, you always have known he can do more than he should, because you know his secret.

No, it's the fact that the mask that's usually there in place is missing, the fact that the one thing that you know *should* be there if he's going to survive isn't, that terrifies you, because when that's gone, that's when you *really* have to worry about your adorable harbinger and your sweet sweet moth. You try to ask the people that brought his body back where it was, but they don't know, so all you can do is ask where they found him, so that you can go after it instead.

You search for hours, over every bit of the area, looking for the small red mask, and you're getting desperate, praying and hoping for this one little chance, for Childe to still be alive, and it finally, *finally* catches your eye, but the state of it is terrible. It's been split in half, jagged and snapped, maybe as if someone knew what they were doing when they tossed it, and it *shatters* your heart, because this is your *only* hope. You have zero chance of seeing him again, now, and yet you still bring it back anyways, because maybe, *maybe*, somehow, he was still in there. *Maybe* he was still ok. You set the two halves on his head, hoping, praying for something, and there is *something*, despite his body being cold, his heart silent. He moves - and he thrashes - and he screams.

The pain of having your soul shattered is not an easy one to describe, and it is much worse to live through. It leaves a wound so much deeper, in a way that may never, ever heal, and Childe could do nothing but *feel* that pain for so long.

Not to mention, he was put back into a body that was *dead.*

At some point, he shifts. It's no longer Childe, it's Foul Legacy, and he's whining, whimpering, shaking so badly. He's in pain, and his face, just like the mask, is cracked, in that same terrible pattern. His *eye* is cracked, too, the beautiful blue that made it up laced with dark fractures, and when it finally, shakily meets with yours, there is confusion, distortion, only half recognition. Something is missing - something is *wrong*. He doesn't feel right, he's in pain and he *hurts* and something. is. wrong.

Childe isn't seen again for a while.

Foul Legacy flickers between bouts of confusion and anguish, and recovery seems near impossible.

i think i've gathered enough evidence to safely say that some of you just like to hurt me emotionally so so much /lh

for context, masktaglia is an AU this lovely anon came up with, the basic premise is that Childe's soul is connected to the mask he wears rather than his physical body and that has Consequences™

you can do nothing but hold Foul Legacy close, trying to infuse as much comfort as you can into the embrace, apologizing over and over and over again. it's your fault- it's all your fault, you should've known the damage was too severe, both to the mask and to the body, but you were too stubborn and now Legacy is suffering because of you and Childe is nowhere to be found- you have to bite your tongue to restrain your tears, focusing on Foul Legacy, confused and in horrible pain. the only thing that eases him seems to be having you close, being in your arms, even as you cry a constant mantra of sorry, I'm sorry, I'm so sorry as you hold him closer, rubbing your thumbs over his trembling claws. you don't dare to touch his face, to brush against the mangled mask, the broken gemstone of an eye- you couldn't bear cause him even more pain

yet he wants you to touch him, wants and needs and pleads to have your hand on his arm, his shoulder, his face- yes, his face. it does hurt, when you trace the jagged crack, but your fingers are so gentle that it feels like he's melting into nothing but stardust, beautiful and free, beneath your touch. you surround him with soft pillows and blankets, silently wondering if Childe will also, someday, return. for a moment, you selfishly hope that he will. then you squash the mere thought under your foot. to bring him back would only cause more pain for Childe and Legacy- as much as it broke your heart, you simply couldn't drag him into a broken, rotten body, especially not with your Abyssal monster, already suffering so much. you can't bring him back. but you can't let him go, either. the matching earring you keep is a testament to that, gleaming dully on the bedside table as you tend to Foul Legacy, letting him sleep fitfully in your lap

perhaps, one day, you'll find a way to heal the cracks and ragged edges that cause him so much agony. you have to. you must

[sammy8d257]

Did you know that in a recent video Alan made with DJ he confirmed that TSC, Green, Yellow, Red and Blue are around the ages of 10 to 12 years old. He also said that they are just really smart children. I really like that they just young kids, makes their mannerisms and child like behavior make more sense.

Hmmm... okay, I want to preface with saying that I'm happy you find joy in headcanoning the Color Gang to be 10 to 12 year olds. I'm glad you like thinking they're kids.

BUT

I've seen a lot of people use that clip of Alan saying they're 10 to 12 year old kids as canon. And like, frankly, I don't see how it can be.

(Goddamn, this is long as hell. Click on the "Keep Reading" if you want to see my entire rant but

TLDR;

It's fine if you see the Color Gang as kids in the range of 10 - 12, more power to you, but I don't see it as canon because it doesn't make sense to me and I personally can't relate to them. So I see them as young adults. )

First off, I honestly don't trust anything Alan has to say when it comes to what is or is not canon to the videos because Alan has said via his Members discord that there isn't any concrete "lore" for the characters and the world aside from a paragraph of personality traits for the Color Gang. While I myself, am not in the Discord, I have a friend who sometimes talks about stuff in there with me. A lot of the things story and lore things he and the team make up as they go. He will just say stuff without really considering previously establish canon.

(Trust me, I know. I've spent so much brainpower trying to connect the stick figure world together in a cohesive manner, its not even funny anymore aldkglsjsgs /lh)

No knock to Alan and his Team though. I understand that AvA/M is an on-going series with SO MANY videos to keep track of. It'd be hard to keep everything inline with lore if you don't have a dedicated keeper of it. But that's the reason why I take anything Alan says outside of the animations themselves, with a grain of salt.

SECONDLY,

Let's break down this "canon" scene shall we?

Actually, lets start a little bit before the scene, so everyone can get some context:

( https://youtu.be/Oz5mDcDK9I4?t=4668 )

The scene is Purple going off with King, to which DJ says:

DJ, voicing over King: Come on son, let's go

DJ, voicing over Purple: Bye guys! I'm gonna go hangout with my adopted dad. I'm 32.

[Alan and DJ laugh]

Alan: Maybe he is.

DJ: That'd be so weird if you find out all the characters are like in their 30s. [more laughs]

Alan: Yeah even though the internet hasn't been around that long.

DJ: Yeah, that's true. How old are they, like since their creation, I guess?

Alan: Huh, good question. ... 14?

DJ: 15? No...

Alan: Probably like 10, 12, 13,

DJ: Yeah, yeah. Which is cool because I feel like they act around then

[Alan laughs]

Alan: Yeah, they're just very smart children.

[END SCENE]

Just reading this, it looks like Alan confirmed that they're 10-13 year olds right?

Yeah if you ONLY look at this and not take into account the joking and non-serious tone both Alan and DJ had throughout this entire conversation. They like joking around and saying things. That's kinda their whole thing during their reacts. Alan is a more dead-pan but he was definitely making a lighthearted joke or comment playing off of the statement of them being 10.

Actually, lets go look at the question leading up to this.

"How old are they, like since their CREATION, I guess?"

Since their creation. AvA 4 is the video where Second and RYGB were first introduced and can serve as their creation date (assuming we're not taking about lore because while AvA 4 is Second's creation date, I'd argue the Stick Fighters were created prior and would in fact be older). AvA 4 premiered in 2014

Which is almost 10 years ago.

There is a high likelihood that both Alan and DJ were using the upload date of AvA 4 as the Color Gang's "creation date".

And if you want to headcanon a stick figure's age is how many years since their creation date, then more power to you.

To me that makes no sense because then that'd mean King is 2 years old. (AvM Parkour released April, 2021) Which is insane. alskdjglsjglsgd

I much prefer the idea that stick figures are created with an age in mind (baring the born stick figures like Purple).

And yeah, maybe Alan "intended" to make the Color Gang 10-13 year olds, but as I stated above, with how joking Alan and DJ were while discussing it plus Alan's whole thing about making things up as they go, I don't really believe it.

ALSO

Not to get too personal, but I just want to address something that's been bothering me with this whole thing.

The idea that because the Color Gang act childish = being children.

Because the sticks are heavily neurodivergent-coded

And as someone who is also neurodivergent, can act childish, see aspects of themself in these sticks, and is an ADULT.

Saying that people who act like this are children??

FUCKING SUCKS

Now I know, DJ, Alan, and probably even yourself Anon, don't mean any harm when you say the sticks act like children so they must be children.

But there is a LONG history of neurodivergent people getting infantilized because they display more "childish" behaviors like stimming or hyperfixating on specific topics.

So for at least me, someone who headcanons the Stick Figures as young adults, this who "age discourse" feels icky to me.

Plus, I personally can't relate to kids because I myself, am an adult. It's easier for me to relate to characters around my age range.

Listen, this rant is getting too long but here's the long and the short of it

There is nothing wrong with headcanoning the sticks as kids if that's what you want to believe that it's canon,

But it just ain't for me.

[faux-parenchyma]

[Winter Drop and Story of the Illagers video talk below]

Now that the initial hype has been settled over the creaking and the winter drop [not really, I'm actually exploding over it] I really want to step back and just consider how the context of the Minecraft world here is changing. I find it so incredibly interesting how a new Minecraft lore video was posted about one of the mobs to be absolutely TERRIFIED of the Creaking shortly after its announcement - the illagers

I've been messing around in my experimental world, found a lovely patch of the pale garden absolutely surrounded by dark forest, only to find a big ol woodland mansion posted up a few blocks from this little border. And I could not just stop thinking like!! Imagine the illagers, living out in the dark forests due to their sickness and post-war riddled minds, having to just constantly think 'hey! remember to avoid this one teensy patch of spooooky forest! it'll kill you!!' The pale garden clearly is on the defense to keep itself alive, I've mentioned that before in a post about it's living ancient ecosystem, but something about their avoidance just makes the illagers feel more human rather than villainous. Like the recent Illager lore video states: they're sickly, they may like to tend to gardens, have an affinity for building totems, monuments, learning magic and transfiguring themselves, like that's all so inherently passive if you leave out the fact that they are 'aggressive' mobs. But just like the creaking, they attack when you approach, you as the PLAYER perceive them as the bad guys. I'd believe they too would have reasons to be defensive whether we know why exactly or not. I'll cook more with illager lore later I need to add this to my list of lore fanon bits to yap about- yall definitely wanna ask me for my thoughts on lore and let me cook on this i promise /lh.

I dunno, I just think as the game moves forward, there will be more substance to this entire region of worlds, more connective lore and whatnot. They did mention in the new video that we should expect to see more illager related things in the future. I do hope we get some sort of fixed up dark forest, for my own sake. In general, things are getting so much bigger, and yet everything small is slowly shifting along with it. and I definitely think that's in a good way.