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itsclydebitches · 2 years

Note

I just watched the "10 most incompetent Star Trek Admirals" on Youtube, and realized that Idiotwood from Volume Two to Volume 7 shares the same tunnel vision and paranoia/fear of these incompetent admirals. No wonder Ironwood was a villain. CRWBY studied well-intentioned extremists from Star Trek. Team RWBY was like the Enterprise. No wonder I felt bad for Ironwood yet hated him from the beginning.

I’m no expert in Star Trek admirals, but from what I remember they’ve often got two significant problems that Ironwood doesn’t: extreme xenophobia and specific, selfish motivations. A lot of the bureaucratic antagonists in Star Trek function as a foil to the open-minded crew of the Enterprise: they don’t trust the Klingons, or the Romulans, or the Changelings, so they release criminals, or develop secret cloaking technology, or create elaborate attacks on their own people to later blame on the aliens, all in an effort to create some long-term, presumed peace with -- you guessed it -- the Federation at the center of it all when the dust clears. Yeah, there’s the underlying message that the ends don’t justify the means (something Ironwood is absolutely arguing in Volume 8), but the far more significant message is that the admirals only reached this conclusion because their xenophobia blinded them to other options. They won't even consider working with/compromising with/sacrificing something for an alien species whose culture is "uncivilized" to them, so the only option that's left, to their mind, is a horrific one. The Enterprise crew is the one (usually) offering to talk it out, or find another, non-violent solution, even with their worst enemies, demonstrating the acceptance of diversity that the bureaucrats not engaging in first contacts and not putting their lives on the line in the name of peaceful exploration have lost sight of.

So there are some key differences there. The first is that the admirals tend to be active whereas Volumes 2-7 Ironwood is reactive. He focuses on defense (a robotic army on hand just in case, built so that real people aren’t put on the front lines) rather than secret, offensive strategies that knowingly endanger others. Penny most definitely technically falls into that category, but like so much else in RWBY, the comparison falls apart once you dig one layer down. Though Penny is indeed a secret project who is meant to bring peace to Remnant -- a purpose which, notably, RWBY drops after Volume 3... -- she’s not a threat to innocents, or to a morally gray enemy that the narrative argues should be compromised with, not destroyed. From the get-go Penny is presented as just a girl with powers, like our protagonists, and though our generic Vytal audience is shocked at her existence, they’re not afraid of an android by default. The people adore Penny when she’s resurrected and the whole “Omg she attacked Robyn’s party!” was... badly done, to put it mildly. The point being that Ironwood’s secret, morally ambiguous project (which, for the record, is really PIETRO’S secret, morally ambiguous project) isn’t a threat to anyone or perceived as such, unlike most of the admirals who are doing shady things that also pose a legitimate, unambiguous threat.

In order for Ironwood to be like many of ST’s admirals I can remember, he’d need to have made a major sacrifice/endangered others in the name of achieving a long-term goal. The closest we get to that is him abandoning Mantle, but that’s a reaction to Salem’s attack, not something he comes up with on his own. There’s a big difference between “Holy shit an immortal witch is going to kill us all, so I’m going to save who I can because no one can come up with a way where we all survive” and “Hmm. Maybe if I kill these people and blame it on the witch, everyone will join together and defeat her. Getting rid of Salem is worth a little murder, right?” Basically, Ironwood is not Watchman’s Ozymandias. Ironwood’s plan to achieve peace is to build a communication tower and, again, we might have a legit comparison if RWBY had ever established why materials for a CTV tower were supposedly decimating Mantle and the ways in which Ironwood is ignoring a better solution. The admirals plans’ are always actively harming someone -- they’re threatening an already established peace, or willfully hurting a community when there are other options, or covering up someone who deserves punishment, etc. -- and it’s firmly established that they Did Not Need to Do This. In contrast, RWBY establishes that it’s 100% necessary to use these resources if they want the tower built -- remember, Ruby wants the tower too -- but Ironwood is somehow still bad because there are consequences for using them, even though those consequences don’t make any sense. It’s like going “Yes, if you want a cake we need to use sugar and then there won’t be any left for other bakes today” only for someone to respond, “No, I want the cake and for there to be plenty of sugar left for other projects because that’s Fair and Good. How dare you not find a way to manage that. I don’t know how to do it, but YOU’RE the bad guy if you can’t magically make the cake and have plenty of sugar leftover. What’s our other project? Oh, building a wall. What do you mean that makes no sense? Don’t question why we want sugar to build a wall, just magic up our cake without using the sugar!” Unlike most Star Trek plot-lines, RWBY is terrible at establishing the basic facts that allow the audience to go, “The Bad Guy is indeed doing a terrible, unnecessary thing in the name of a larger, sympathetic goal and thus though we might understand their position, we can’t support it.”

The other major difference is that the admirals often have some selfish goal that’s an underlying motivation. They want to appear important and in control; the one who always knows better than the starship captain. They want advanced technology to increase their/the Federation’s power, presenting a colonizer-like ideology that the rest of the Federation must fight against. They want to eradicate a planet/culture due to that xenophobia and hide that desire behind ‘protecting’ others. I’m pretty sure at least two in Star Trek’s history were after freaking immortality. The point is that they’re almost always bad guys outside of whatever “the needs of the many” arguments they’ve got going on -- and the fact that Kirk and Spock are the originators of that claim certainly complicates things. Kirk himself is an admiral who does some Shady Stuff in the name of getting what he wants, Spock, but of course we support that because we care more about their relationship than we do the rules, or even a ship full of Klingons -- but Ironwood doesn’t have anything else going on? He’s overtly set up to contrast another antagonist, Jacques, who is known for his racism and his greed. He consistently supports the heroes in ways that never backfire, or turn out to be manipulation (praising Ruby, telling the kids they can leave the Beacon fight, Yang’s arm, defending Weiss, letting them stay in Atlas, etc.) He’s not shown to be racist against the faunus. He’s not after some selfish gain like, say, securing the Staff to enact a personal wish. He’s shown to put off martial law until the final hour and until he went Cartoon Villain, frequently and in earnest sought out others’ opinions. Up until hours before his death, Ironwood has the least information out of the entire group, putting him in the worst position to pull any strings. We literally get a scene in which a child fills him in on the Biggest Secret Ever and his reaction is to quietly grapple with that, a huge contrast to our heroes’ violence and dismissal. The fandom claims that Ironwood is power-hungry, but power-hungry people don’t beg allies to help them fix problems, or go through 99% of their run-time with very little, actual power (being on the council means nothing in this war. Ozpin, and then later Ruby, hold all the cards that matter). Ironwood possesses a lot of political power due to a flawed system that he’s likely too young to have built and he can be stubborn when he thinks he’s hit on the right solution, but damn... he’s got nothing on Ruby. Presenting tunnel-vision as an antagonists’ crucial flaw depends heavily on not giving your hero the exact same flaw, only worse and presented as a defining strength.

Now toss in that the Enterprise almost always has a plan that the admiral refuses to listen to. I’ve long argued that it’s crucial that Team RWBY were unable to come up with a better solution for Ironwood than, “Idk we’ll just win somehow because we’re the good guys!!” Ironwood was never offered a better solution and, crucially, he is shown to be in the right. As fans have said over and over, it's not paranoia -- a dangerous, inaccurate fear -- when the character is 100% correct in the level of threat they're facing. Ironwood says it’s too dangerous to hold the festival without additional protection and sure enough, Cinder launches a massive grimm attack that decimates the school. This event proves that the Kingdoms are all in danger, thus necessitating more security and, lo and behold, huntsmen are being murdered off and again Cinder sneaks past their defenses. He wants to create the communication tower which our heroes are BIG fans of... despite knowing, unlike Ironwood, that more forces won’t defeat Salem due to her immortality. Ironwood said they couldn’t defeat Salem and guess what? They couldn’t. The heroes ran just like he planned to, the only difference is that they waited a whole lot longer, lost two Relics along the way, got a friend killed, ‘died’ themselves, and still didn’t rescue everyone--the one thing that would have made their choice better than his. It’s important to show that the antagonists are operating under flawed thinking, which indeed usually happens with ST’s admirals, but with Ironwood I’m always going, “He’s right though? I mean, the fandom likes to ignore/twist/make up stuff that makes him seem wrong, but based on actual, canonical facts the guy has been nailing it when it comes to assessing the danger of each situation. The fact that the assessment is continually ‘Our situation sucks and there are no good options here’ isn’t his fault.”

TL;DR

Ironwood reacts to established threats rather than plotting attacks of his own.

His reactions are primarily defensive rather than offensive.

The enemy he’s fighting is an Established Evil (Salem) and Literal Monsters Without Souls (grimm) as opposed to a different species the story has worked to get the viewer attached to (Klingons, Romulans, etc.).

Despite what the fandom would like to claim in an effort to make things more palatable, Ironwood is not doing all this to achieve a selfish, personal goal.

The heroes are not able to offer Ironwood better options like ST’s crews usually are.

The plot consistently proves Ironwood right, rather then demonstrating how unnecessary and needlessly cruel his plans are.

+1 Ironwood is an established character a lot of fans love, not a one-off side character whose sole purpose is to Be The Bad Guy.

+2 Star Trek is a show that’s all about the morally gray, tough decisions, and how we fight for what’s right in the face of that ambiguity. RWBY wishes it were Star Trek. If CRWBY did study ST, they studied it like all their other inspirations: copying the basics without understanding what made them work in the first place.

#rwde #rwby #mymetas

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niiine · 2 years

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Music

Your relationship with them as Taylor Swift's songs. And oh, I've rushed some of them so please don't expect much. Love these guys so much. Enjoy? MESS AHEAD.

Scaramouche, Xiao, Bakugou Katsuki, Todoroki Shouto, Karma Akabane, Gakushu Asano, Nakahara Chuuya x Reader (Separate)

Angst, Hurt and Comfort, Fluff

Scaramouche – Safe and Sound

People think it’s gonna be toxic. They think it’s gonna break you, that it’s wrong, That you’re wrong. That Scaramouche can never do things right. You sighed, it’s normal after all. The lad is giant a ball of anger and hatred. There’s no second thought about hurting his subordinates, about murdering his enemies — There’s no second thought when it comes to causing destruction, so of course, your friends would say that dating him is like putting a knife on your throat.

But they’re not there every time the sunset comes. On nights you feel his body crumbles before yours, how his arms held your figure tighter and tighter as nightmares devour his dreams, how he melts as your words assure him that you’re not leaving, that you’ll never let him go. It’s when everything that they’ve said is proven wrong.

But Archons, a knife on your throat is more enticing than witnessing the man you love so much breaks. Hearing his quivers and sobs are more terrifying than everything they’ve warned you about.

“I’m here. I’m not leaving,” he nodded, head planting deeper in your chest. You combed his hair with your gentle digits, whispering a soft phrase “Close your eyes, no one can hurt you now.”

Xiao – Enchanted

Xiao is immortal. Xiao will live forever, unless battle take away his breath. Xiao will leave without you. A bitter laugh left your lips at the thought, followed by his name.

“You called?” He greeted you, eyes scanning your body before meeting yours. Ah, since when did you become so selfish? “I just wanna see you.” you stated, reaching out for his arms and guiding him near your figure. “You have a lifetime to see me.” you giggled at how his lips pouted, a small protest for his lies.

“Is it wrong for me to call out your name?” he shook his head, words failing to form. Only you have this power on him. Your head fall on his shoulders, and he enjoyed the warmth. It’s something he’s new to, something he’s not familiar with. “Xiao,” he hummed in response, ears focused on your voice alone. “Meeting you in this lifetime, is enchanting—” Xiao’s eyes widened, his golden orbs began to tear up. “Until I see you again, all I will be able to think of is your name.” Once again, you laugh at how selfish you are;

“Please, don’t be in love with someone else.” Your tender eyes fluttered close, and Xiao tightened his grip around your body. Silent screams echoing inside his head, screaming at fate for taking away all the things that keep him warm.

Bakugou Katsuki – Exile

It’s a punishment, a lesson, and he knows that the two of you have ended up months ago. But he can’t keep his death stares away from you and the man you’re with. It used to be him.

“It’s Class A’s reunion, why’d she brought that shithead” Bakugo growled at Kirishima, piercing eyes directed at Monoma who’s holding your hand. “If you don’t like it, you should’ve work better” the redhead waived, turning towards your other classmates.

It’s peaceful night, really. But you can’t just shake off the feeling that he’s watching you. A glimpse on his direction and you’re right. Your eyes met, crimson ones softening for a moment, before whipping away. You sighed, are you being unfaithful to your lover? No, but you’re a liar.

You decided to have a refresher, unwinding a little outside wouldn’t be too bad. But Katsuki being Katsuki, he decided to ruin it. “That dumbhead? Seriously” he started, startling you. “He’s better than you” It’s an attack he can’t dodge, all because it’s true “And what? Like he can listen?” You looked him dead in the eye, whispering the words he’s oh so scared to hear. “Yes, Katsuki—” He’s searching for any sign of wavering in your tone. Of a chance for another try, but he knows that the two of you have always walked a very thin line, and it’s impossible.

“He’s the home I’m looking for.” And with that, he decided to help you walk out.

Todoroki Shouto – Red

Adoring the number one hero’s son is a feat anyone can do, but loving him is only for you. Some claims that they do, some professed that they do, but only you can pull off a stunt so stupid as to love the two-toned hero. And if asked what it feels like being in a relationship with him, you’d say it’s the color wheel. A myriad of emotions and feelings that can be described by the shade or deep or softness of hues.

“You shouldn’t have.” You rolled your eyes on him as he gives you a stoic expression. “Yeah, I shouldn’t have, but the girls want to work this out.” You huffed, thoughts running back on how Ochako and Jiro pushed you to come and bring the lectures for today’s class to Todoroki. “We’re long done” You hate how calm he said it. As if accepting the fact that you’re no longer together is as easy as breathing.

Your mind hate how fast things are between the two of you. One day you’re happy in his arms, with red roses, beating heart, and crimson cheeks – and then the next it’s raining, grey skies and salty tears and monochromatic sadness. “I have to go, make sure you read the notes.”

“(Y/N),” He called your name and your movement was halted. How come your heart still hopes for something?

“Yes?”

“Take care” You nodded, burning fire blazing in the back of your mind. You really gotta let go now.

He’s all you want, but you have to move on. A colorful autumn, fleeting, young, and fading.

Loving him was red.

Akabane Karma – All you had to do was stay

It’s unfair. It’s so unfair. How can you love him so much it’s physically painful? How can he break and break and break you and still you want him with every piece he has made?

“I’m sorry, (y/n). I swear, I promise. I will not do it again. Please” You look at his eyes and regretted it in an instant. His apologies, his tears, it looks so real. Your heart wants to believe his words, to fall once again, to be his home again— but you can’t be dumb anymore. “One more, one more chance and I’ll prove that I’ve changed” He tried to reach out to your hand, but he has said goodbye before, and goodbye you will give.

“Akabane-san,” you started, and Karma’s heart sank at how you call him. Where’s the usual Karma? Where’s the you that is his? “You were all I wanted,” You smiled, but it’s a smile he never knew he’s be so scared seeing. “—but this? this is what you want.” His world crumbles at your words. He thought it’ll be easy having you back, that you love him so much you’ll forgive him no matter what, and God was he so wrong.

“It would’ve been easy for the two of us” you paused, trying to keep yourself together, before finally letting him go, “If only you’ve stayed” Your eyes sent daggers in his soul. Regret washed over his body as he looked at the girl who he used you to have.

“Because that’s all you have to do, stay.” Oh sweetheart, if only he knew.

Gakushu Asano – Cold as you

He is perfect. A model student, a strong individual, he’s everything good in this world. And who are you to decline a flawless gift? He came barging and claiming you— a typical normal girl and a popular guy. But what could go wrong? Everything.

You’ve aimed too high, too far, but your feet never left the ground. How dare you desire Asano Gakushu? And now what seems to be a perfect day for you comes crashing down, rain pouring from your eyes. A few feet away, the flawless lad looks anything but perfect. His arms in the back of another girl, his gentle digits caressing her cheeks, doing what he wants because you’re not what he wanted.

So you walked away, ain't no use defending him in your thoughts, leaving a whimper enough for him to hear. Oh, how you wish he’d follow you. What a mess you are of a dreamer to hope he would.

And now you’re pulling yourself up, Asano decided to crash once again. Coming with a great little story of how sorry he was and that he really loved you. Fuck him and the way he comes easily to you. “(Y/N), please.” His lilac eyes pleading for your forgiveness, for another chance, as if the scars he left weren’t as obvious as it is. He says there’s no night he doesn’t think of you, that for days it’s always about you, that he needs you back, and you could’ve accepted him once more, but thinking back, you’re done being in a place as cold as him.

With the sternest look you could muster, with a façade you’re not so sure that could fool him, you answer his plea “You never did give a damn thing, but I cried for you—” more than a few nights, more than numbered days. “And that won’t happen again.”

Nakahara Chuuya – Gorgeous

To say that Chuuya’s pissed is understatement. This guy’s patience is as short as him, and there’s no was in hell that he could last your teasing and taunting. And look at you, enjoying your night as if you’re not getting on his nerves. You caught his eyes staring at your, and it sent shiver down your spine— It’s Ocean blue and you’re drowning. With the alcohol kicking in, it’s easier to come near him and not feel so agitated.

“Enjoying the party babe?” Your voiced dragged at the last part, and ohh how his eyes looked so shocked and flustered. “Shut up.” He bites his lips, preventing the curses to escape. “Aww, you don’t wanna hear me speak? fine” you gave him a wink before walking away, trying to see if he can handle more of your antics. You spent the next few hours paying him no attention. One minute you’re all over him and then the next he’s invisible. It’s infuriating him how you’re talking to anyone but him. You’re really like your brother when it comes to pissing him off.

Dragging you out of the room, he berated you with questions. But God, you can’t say anything to his face, he’s just so gorgeous. “Come on, I won’t be able to control myself if I keep talking to you” You smiled flirtatiously, and Chuuya could feel his face burning up. “Take it as a compliment shorty.” You giggled, and all he knew is that he’s kissing you. Taking in the warmth of your lips and the taste of the whiskey you’ve been drinking. “I hate you for making me feel this way” his voice’s husky and deep, and you’re all over him again. The feelings you do nothing but suppress coming out in a wild song of emotions. “But what can I say?” He continued, pecking your lips once more “You’re so gorgeous.”

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ultraintrovertedgryffindor · 3 years

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Can I please request a newt smut where he’s just having a rough day and she tries to make him feel better with a sweet soft session? Maybe where’s she’s on top for once and he’s just heart eyes over it? Thanks darling!

Of course, my dear Anon! Newt is just a sub in my eyes, honestly

NSFW WARNING

~~~~~~~~~~

Newt huffed sharply, wiping a bead of sweat from his brow.

He had been working all day in the hot sun, pulling weeds from the gardens and ordering the newest Greenie around.

As if that weren't hard enough, the Slicers somehow managed to lose a pig, it accidently escaping from the Blood House and wreaking havoc all around the Glade.

Since no one seemed to be competent enough to handle it, Newt recruited a couple of his close friends and managed to catch the boar in less than an hour.

Sometimes, Newt couldn't believe how so many guys could be so reckless even when they've been in the Glade for so long. Pretty unacceptable in his eyes.

But alas, it was just one of those days where the Gladers were just tired, of the work and the situation that it reflected in their work. It was fine, tomorrow would be a new day and that was that.

But even Newt noticed how badly he must've looked, because he felt it. Sweaty, beaten down by the humid heat, an irritated expression on his face. He never really stayed annoyed for long, but looking like he was annoyed was better than looking like he was in pain.

Since everyone pretty much knew about Newt's leg, he was always a bit self-conscious about showing how much it really affected him all the time. The running around always put a lot of strain on his leg, it never really healing right after that night in the Maze. It was aching a considerable amount after chasing after that pig, but he was thankful it happened on a hot day, the cold only increasing the pain.

But Newt knew it would be okay, knowing he always had something at the end of the day: you.

When you came up in the Box, it was pretty much love at first sight, if there was such a thing. You were the light at the end of the tunnel, his lighthouse that he could always spot in the darkness when the ocean waves wanted to drown him most days. Sometimes he wished you were in the Glade before he made that decision to go out into the Maze, which he thought was selfish of him, but now he had something to live for other than making sure his plants didn't rot.

When the Maze doors finally closed, signaling the end of the work day, Newt carried himself to his hut that he shared with you, following the path he took so many times that it was second nature at this point. Like a moth to a flame, he gravitated to the place he knew where his home would be, waiting for him.

Newt opened the door to his hut, feeling his mood already lifting when he saw you.

"Hey!" You greeted happily, clearly you had a good day compared to Newt. You gave a quick kiss to the corner of his mouth. "How was your day?"

Newt only huffed in reply, not bothering to explain how hectic his day was. He walked past you and grabbed a small towel. "I'm gonna wash up."

You furrowed your brows at his bluntness, usually he was happy to vent if he had a bad day. You watched as he walked out the door again. You would've joined him, but you had already taken a shower before you got back to the hut. You smirked, as you got an idea...

Newt had a hard time standing while showering, his exhaustion almost getting the best of him. But the cold water definitely fixed his heat problem, and it helped relax him slightly. If the water were warm, he'd probably fall asleep standing up.

After washing up, Newt headed back to the hut with a more tolerable attitude. He didn't want to be in a bad mood when you two went to bed, since it was the only thing he really cared about, just a nice and comfortable end to a long day. But that it not what was waiting for him...

Newt's eyes widened and his face quickly flushed at the sight of you, naked. If he wasn't so tired, he would've pounced on you then and there. "Y/n..."

"Mhm?" You smirked, sultry walking closer to him.

Newt sighed. "Darling, as much as I'd love to, it's been a real long day-"

"I know that." You interrupted, finally closing the gap between the two of you. "That's why you won't have to do anything at all, just let me take care of you." You connected your lips, running your hands over his torso and wrapping your arms around his neck, feeling the dampness of his freshly washed hair.

Newt pulled away. "You don't have to, love." He said with a slight stutter, his cock already hardening at your roaming hands.

"You're always doing most of the work. Let me help you relax, okay?" You kissed him again, then taking his hand and leading him to your shared bed.

Newt finally surrendered himself, allowing you to have your way with him.

You gently pushed him down on the bed, kissing him passionately, then slowly lowering your kisses down. You made sure to leave a couple love bites on his neck, then trailing down his now shirtless torso, gently nipping his skin.

You looked up at Newt with a smile, placing a kiss on his V line before slowly pulling his pants off his legs. You chuckle softly when his cock quickly sprung out of his boxers, eager to be played with.

You trailed a few rough kisses up his inner thighs, taking your time until you finally got to his pretty pink shaft. You licked a stripe on the underside of his cock, smirking when you heard him let out a breathy whine. You gently grabbed the base of his cock, kitty licking his tip before taking the head into your mouth and sucking gently. "Y/n..." Newt shuddered, bucking his hips slightly.

"Shh..." You whispered, rubbing your hands over his hips. "Just relax."

You took more of his cock in your mouth, humming happily around his shaft, the vibration causing Newt to moan softly. You picked up the pace a little, bobbing your head up and down as far as you could, your hand moving with you to stimulate what your mouth couldn't. "So good, love. So good..." Newt praised.

You pleasured Newt like that for a good few minutes, his moans and sighs increasing in volume, but you decided to stop and trail more sloppy kisses up his torso until you got to his lips.

You straddled Newt, kissing him while you rubbed yourself on his dick, the stimulation you craved while going down on him finally being given to you caused you to moan breathily. "God..." You giggled.

You sat up, gently taking Newt's dick in your hand and using it to tease your entrance. You and Newt both moaned in unison as you slowly lowered yourself on his cock, feeling him stretching you deliciously. "That feels so good, love, fuck..."

Newt watched you bounce up and down on his cock, your face contorted in pleasure. Seeing you feel so good from his dick made his pleasure all the more intense. He knew you said that you wanted to do all the work, but he wanted you to come too.

You moaned loudly as Newt reached down to rub fast circles on your clit, that sensation combined with his cock perfectly hitting that special spot inside of you fast-tracking your own orgasm rapidly.

Newt felt you clench tightly around him as you climaxed, focusing on your beautiful expression as he made you come. He tried to keep his eyes on you as he felt himself getting close, keeping your gaze as he felt the warm buildup. And finally, the tension broke and Newt quickly pulled out and shot his come all over his stomach, feeling himself deflate.

You leaned down to give him one more passionate kiss before plopping down on the bed beside him, a giddy grin plastered on your face. "Do you feel better now?" You asked playfully, knowing fully well what his answer would be.

"You really have to ask?" Newt chuckle, rolling onto his side to look into your eyes. "Have I ever mentioned how much I love you?" He said softly.

You smiled. "Once or twice."

~~~~~~~~~~

Phew, that got me feelin' some type of way.🥵 Anyway, it is 4 a.m. and I can't stop writing...halp

#the maze runner #the maze runner imagine #the maze runner smut #tmr newt #newt imagine #newt x reader #newt smut

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just-a-quirkless-loser · 4 years

Text

You Are More Than Enough ⚡️🧱

Alpha Kirishima x F! Beta Reader x Alpha Kaminari

Requested by @lizwello

Words: 4K

Summary: Your two alphas, Kaminari and Kirishima, ease your insecurities due to your Beta status

⚠️NSFW⚠️

(Not my art. Please credit the artist if you know their handle💕)

Biology failed you; instead of having a mouthwatering scent like an Omega or the strong presence of an Alpha, you were born a Beta. That means that you were normally the third choice for everyone (even for your fellow Betas).

Your entire life you’ve always felt like a secondary character in the lives of your friends (which was somewhat expected but it still hurt) and even yourself. Your omega friends were being courted while your alpha friends were doing the courting. Where did that leave you? Alone. Unwanted.

Media and schooling has a lot to do with your low self-confidence. Betas make up 90% of the population yet, alphas and omegas are the ones that get the glory. The media portrays the alpha as a possessive lover over the meek, submissive omega. The media romanticizes it so much that it becomes the ideal relationship. The media doesn’t show Betas being with omegas or alphas. No, Betas must mate with Betas.

Sometimes, there are exceptions to everything. Alphas can be with alphas. Omegas can be with Betas. Omegas can be with Omegas (it’s rare but it has happened once before). Naturally, you expected you’d end up with another Beta. How could you not?

It makes sense; from a biological standpoint, omegas bodies and pheromones are meant for an alpha. Alphas knots are meant to be taken by an omega’s sweet body.

Shiketsu High School was a relatively peaceful school (which was completely different from U.A. when you had been in attendance). You had graduated at the top of your class, alongside Inasa, and had been invited to join All Might’s hero agency. You supposed it was only a matter of time before pro-heroes started to approach you with job opportunities given your quirk.

Born with the power of fear manipulation, you’d think you had a better grip of your own fears. Everyday, you went into the minds of villains and used their weaknesses against them however, you never thought about your own. You didn’t fear anything physical so, you suppose you’d call your fear mental-maybe emotional. A fear of not being good enough.

So, when you started the job, you were fearful of what to expect. How would your co-workers treat you? Would anyone be interested in you?

You know you may sound desperate but you can’t help it. Maybe it was the lack of experience from your youth or your pessimistic view of the world but, you wanted the same love you saw around you. After all, isn’t that what everyone wants? To feel loved?

Your first day at All Might’s agency was something you’ll never forget. He wanted you there early so you could meet your comrades before they started their patrolling. You remember how he dwarfed you even in his skinny stature.

“Do you have any questions?” His hand was softly ushering you into one of the debriefing rooms. “Don’t be afraid to ask. Anything to do with your quirk? Or, maybe work hours? Or-“

“Sir, I think you’re more nervous than I am,” perhaps it’s because he’s an alpha. It’s his preposition to fret about the health and comfort of others.

“Sorry,” he laughs and rubs the back of his neck, cerulean eyes glancing down at you. “Young Midoriya always tells me I’m like a mother hen. I just want you to feel comfortable. Most of everyone that works here went to U.A. so I know you may feel singled out.”

A silence was the only response he got; you’d be damned if you ever said anything for him or anyone else to pity you. You didn’t get to be this strong because of pity.

“EVERYONE, GATHER AROUND. THE NEW HERO IS HERE,” everyone came rushing in with their colorful costumes on display. The pro-hero ‘Deku’ was the first to greet you in an excited frenzy.

“Y/N, I’m Deku. Well, Izuku Midoriya but everyone calls me Deku. What’s your quirk? All Might wouldn’t tell us,” you know notice the notebook he holds in his hand.

“Why do you need to know? You want to know my weaknesses?” You quirk your brow and feel your guard going back up. Behind you, All Might was noticing your combative attitude, noting it will definitely take a while for you to fit in.

“Wha-no, no, no. Nothing like that. I-I just wanted to know,” he’s sputtering when a brown-haired woman comes to his side.

“You’ll have to excuse Deku. He just gets excited about quirks. He’s documented all of ours so he can analyze them and give us suggestions to help us reach our greatest potential,” the woman smiles at the blubbering greenette. “I’m Uraraka.”

“Nice to meet you. I’m Y/N.”

“Stop hogging her,” it’s like time started lagging. Your eyes fell on a blonde with a fringe, his fringe having a black light night strip. He’s lean in stature but, his eyes are the type of honey blonde that could stop anyone in their tracks (although it’s a shame he’s wearing blue tinted glasses that simmer the color). “Woah.”

“Woah?” You cross your arms across your chest.

“Yes, woah. You’re beautiful,” you turn bright red. “And, responsive. You smell good too.”

The next moment he’s stuck on your neck, pulling you by the back of your head so he can expose more of your scent to his nose. Your mouth waters at how good he smells as well.

“DENKI! You can’t go around smelling and scenting people without their permission,” from what you can see, the man admonishing the alpha on your neck has fire engine red eyes and bright red hair. You can catch glimpses of his sharp teeth when he speaks but your mind focuses on his lips. You look further down to see his torso exposed, body hard with muscle. “Woah.”

“This is Y/N. The new hero I was telling you all about last week. Please treat her with respect and make her feel at home,” All Might was smiling down at you.

“I’m Kirishima. The one scenting you is Kaminari,” you just nod till Kaminari is finished and let’s go. Even if it’s only for a second, Kirishima replaces Kaminari’s place on your body, fogging your mind up once again. You want to whine at the strong scents but you keep that to yourself. They’re probably just playing with you.

“Both of you, give her some space,” All Might’s demand is enough for them to take a few steps back but, you can still smell them as if they’re still on you. “You okay, Y/N?”

“I’m fine.”

And, you were fine for a while till, you kept getting closer with the two alphas that scented you on your first day. You knew they were special. They were close, not mates but, close enough for anyone that didn’t know them to think so. You couldn’t tell what their relationship was but, they welcomed you into their duo with no questions asked, making their duo a trio.

“She’s the one,” even without knowing you for long, Kirishima can tell you’re meant for him and Kaminari.

“Just look at how perfect she is,” Denki fawns at you from across the room. “She doesn’t smile much. Luckily, I have so many jokes for her,” Kirishima facepalms as Kaminari gives him his signature thumbs up.

“I have a feeling you’re going to drive her up a tree, aren’t you?” Kaminari nods. “Well, at least make sure you don’t push her too much.”

“I won’t, scouts honor. Sooo, which one of us is going to ask her out?” Kaminari already has a few ideas of how to ask her but he doubts Kirishima will trust him with speaking to her without scenting her for the next few times he encounters her.

“I think we both know I’ll be the one to ask her. We need to get her familiar with us before you start sending shocks up her legs,” they both smirk at the pun.

And, so, an unlikely (in your opinion) friendship began to form between you, Kaminari, and Kirishima. Both alphas pursued you no matter how much you insisted their efforts would be appreciated somewhere else. Albeit, you did enjoy the attention they gave you.

“Y/N, come here so we can cuddle,” you barely have any time to yourself as they both grab you and tuck you under their arm (truthfully, you don’t mind the attention). Either you sit on their lap willingly or they’ll grab you and put you there on their own accord.

It doesn’t take much time for them to ask for your friendship to be morphed into something more. Despite your outward disparity, you’re elated when they ask you to be with them. Maybe it’s because you’re selfish and wouldn’t be able to bare them treating someone else the way they’ve treated you.

‘Pro-Heroes ‘Chargebolt’ and ‘Red Riot’ Take New Beta Hero ‘Y/N’ As A Mate.’ The press had a field day when you first confirmed the rumors circulating about what was going on amongst the three of you. Some approved the relationship while most asked the obvious question: Why were eligible alphas such as Chargebolt and Red Riot wasting their time on a Beta?

It just didn’t make much sense. They had the cream of the crop, omegas throwing themselves at the heroes left and right, matchmakers contacting them to find them an omega for free. Hell, some even tried to discredit them as alphas, saying they had to settle for a Beta. That type of response made you weary (well, you’d always been weary no matter how much they tried to dispel your fears).

They made sure to take you out every other day, sometimes they’d do individual dates but most of the time it was the three of you. Their embraces always made you comfortable, almost like you belonged with them. However, you still couldn’t ignore that inkling in your mind that made you doubt the likelihood of your relationship.

Your doubts often consumed your thoughts, which pissed Kaminari and Kirishima off to no end.

Kaminari was much more direct with his approach to your insecurities. He’d talk your ear off, send a few shocks to your core, and give you a faux innocent smile. “You’re so perfect for us, Y/N. There’s no need to be scared that you’re not enough.”

Surprisingly, Kirishima is something else entirely in his wake to assure you. He’s dominant and domineering (which often ends up with you on your belly with your ass up as he spanks his words into your mind). It’s like night and day between the two of them. “Y/N, how many times do I have to tell you you’re meant for us? Or, maybe you like being spanked like this?”

Eventually, you move in with them. It seemed natural at the time to be with them in that aspect so you could be with them every moment of the day. However, you still have your reservations.

One day, you’re sitting on the couch in the living room watching some rom com when an advertisement pops on the screen. You knew you should’ve turned the channel but, you couldn’t help yourself as you felt enticed by what they were selling.

Created specifically for Betas, a perfume that will make your scent more enticing to alphas. The perfect way to capture the attention of that special alpha you’ve been wanting. Guaranteed happiness for both you and your partner. How could you not put in an order for the scent?

You didn’t really think it out, didn’t consider that Kaminari and Kirishima adore the way you smell. You just wanted to make them happy and you thought this was the easiest way.

It took two long months for the perfume to be shipped out and one more month for it to be mailed to the correct address (apparently, a lot of other Betas had the same idea as yourself). The stuff was expensive, coming in at thirty-one thousand yen a bottle.

‘This shit better work. I could’ve bought so much food with that money,’ you stare at the bottle as you contemplate whether or not you should really do it. ‘If this doesn’t work, they’ll be really pissed off.’

“Kirishima will be home early, SparkPlug. I have to stay behind for a mission. You sure you’ll be okay alone?” Kaminari had your face between his hands and your foreheads rested against one another’s.

“Yes, Sparky. I’ll be fine. Go do your job,” you were going to enjoy this day off. You had worked double shifts the past month for this moment.

He smirked, slowly brought your lips to his, and shocked you with his tongue, making your eyes dilate. “Be a good girl for us while we’re gone.”

He left and you were not a good girl. You spent the whole day dousing yourself in the perfume (i.e. you literally dumped half the bottle into some bath water so it could fuse with your skin). You even bought a new babydoll negligee for when they came home. So, when Kirishima walked through the front door, you were walking around in your silk robe.

“Kiri, babe I missed you,” you were waiting for him on the side of the door, legs exposed and your creamy skin distracting him for a few moments.

“I-Uh missed you too, RockCandy,” he lifts you into his large arms, nuzzling your neck. He’s always called you RockCandy since he picked up the habit from Fatgum. “W-what is that smell?” Kirishima’s nose twitched at the obnoxious sweet scent that seemed to ooze out of your pores.

“It’s a new perfume. How does it smell?” You were optimistic that he’d like it. That would mean that Kaminari would enjoy it too. And, that would mean that you could finally please them.

“Sweetheart, honey, baby, love-“

“Just spit it out.”

“I hate it,” Kirishima rubs your back to comfort you.

“Oh,” you rest your head on his shoulder, wanting to cry. “Well, I’ll go take a shower.”

You walk off before he can stop you, storming to the bathroom where the first thing you did was throw that stupid fucking bottle of lousy perfume in the small trash can near your bed.

You’re pretty sure you heard the negligee rip a bit with how hard you pulled it off of your body and hopped into the shower.

You’re crying out of frustration. Why did you think that was going to work? Were you really that desperate with changing yourself that you really did that? Who in their right mind does-

“Beta, what is this?”

Huh?

“What the fuck is this?” You peep your head from behind the curtain to see Kirishima holding the scent change bottle.

“Uh it-it’s...y-you know! It’s on the damn bottle Kiri!” He grabs your face in his hand, squishing your cheeks together.

“What did you just say to me?” Kirishima’s face was close, his breath ghosting over your lips. “Are you challenging me, baby?”

“Nooooo, no. Definitely not trying to challenge you at all. I’m just frustrated,” you pout.

“That pout isn’t gonna help you. You think it’s okay to cuss at me just because you're frustrated?” You shake your head. “You think it’s okay to change yourself?”

You’re stuck between a rock and a hard place. On one hand, you can deny it but he’s seen the proof. On the other hand, you can come clean however, you doubt that you’ll get away with this unscathed. What to do?

“I just wanted to be better for the both of you. I know that I don’t smell the best and I know that you both could’ve done better,” you sniffle.

“Y/N, get your ass in that shower and wash that shit off. I wanna smell what’s mine. Better hurry. Kaminari is on his way home,” you jump to action. You’re scrubbing your body with a loofa (it’s most likely one of your alphas). Apparently, he’s not gonna give you any sympathy.

Kirishima sits on the toilet beside the shower, watching you like a hawk. Whenever you scrub between your legs, he licks his lips and his sharp teeth are exposed. He notices you staring at them and runs his teeth along the top.

You want to draw the shower out but, you know Kirishima will pull you out once he knows that you are milking it. Plus, you want to get out before Kaminari gets home.

You step out into the cold air and you’re wrapped in a towel by Kiri. His arms keep you caged against his broad chest, making you melt at the contact. The towel is the only thing separating him from seeing your naked body.

“Kiri, I’ve got to get dressed.”

“No, you get on the bed and take that towel off. I want you on your back with your legs spread, pussy open for me to eat. I’m sure Kaminari would love that too,” he pushes you forward, spanking your ass before you're completely away from his touch.

So, yeah that’s how you ended up in that position, waiting for Kaminari to get home while Kirishima was leaving bite marks on your inner thighs. You grip the sheets while your face contorts with pleasure, his mouth dangerously close to the place you need him most but still denying you the pleasure you want.

“Ohhh, Sparkplug, you couldn’t wait for me to get home?” You didn’t even hear the front door open as Kaminari came home. He sniffed as he crossed the threshold, something disgusting in the air, but he quickly tossed that aside when he heard your moans.

Just imagine how good it felt for him to see you on your shared bed, pussy glistening with juices that he knows will soon be his meal, nipples pointing to the sky, face so beautiful and pleasured.

“Kami, guess what our little girl did this time?” You tense a bit.

“Must have been something good for this type of treatment,” Kaminari shed his clothes as he stepped further into the room, clothes beneath him as he settled next to Kirishima, spreading your legs even further to accommodate both of them.

“Quite the opposite. This one decided to change her scent. Fucking nasty. Smelled nothing like her. She tried to change what we like,” and suddenly you're looking into the eyes of two alphas that are ready to punish their mate.

“Did she?”

“I’m sure you smelled it.”

“I did but, I assumed I was just smelling something wrong,” Kaminari drags his pinky against your clit, a small shock making you cry out.

“Daddy, pleaseee,” drool is pooling a bit on the side of your mouth.

“You’re not in any position to ask anything. Now, shush, the alphas are speaking,” you’re flooding the sheets with arousal, wetness slipping down the crack of your ass. “What do you think we should do to her?”

“I say we eat first then fuck her so hard she can’t question anything,” Kirishima has a dark small on his face. “She needs some good ole’ DP therapy.”

“I was just thinking the same thing,” they both flatten their tongue and lick on your outer lips at the same time, holding one of your legs on each of their shoulders for some stability. Kaminari’s tongue stiffens to push into your weeping hole while Kirishima nibbles softly on your clit. Their saliva makes you wetter than you already were.

Both groan at the taste of you when they first make contact. Your sweet tang is something neither of them will ever tire of. Both of them hold your legs open as they feast, your juices rushing down their chins as you can feel some of your essence squirt when the pleasure keeps building up. It was hard enough trying not to cum since you didn’t have permission but it seemed like they didn’t care as they didn’t even slow down. They licked up your juice, Kaminari sucking on your clit while Kirishima speared his tongue into your hole, hardening his tongue when he got far enough to touch that special spot within you.

Your legs are shaking, your vision dotted black as they draw away from you, making you think that maybe they will have mercy on you. Not even close. Kaminari laid down on the bed, your juices against his back as Kirishima settled your core over his mouth, essentially putting you in a position to ride Kaminari’s face. His tongue continued its work as Kirishma pushed you over a bit, exposing your backhole to him. He licked his lips with anticipation, thinking about the last time you allowed him to do this.

‘It’s been too long,’ Kirishima thinks to himself as he starts to slowly prod at your asshole with his tongue, his hands spreading your ass so he can push his tongue in further. At the same time, Kaminari sent a spark on your clit, the feeling making you clench your toes as you rocked back onto Kirishima’s tongue.

“Pleaseeee, don’t wanna wait any longer. Please, fuck me,” Kirishima laughed at your begging. “Kiri, pleasee.”

“What’s my name?” Kirishima leaned over to the nightstand beside the bed to pull out some lube, squirting some onto his cock and onto your hole. He knew he would have to prep you, so he slipped one finger into your hole, meeting little resistance. Another two were pushed in and you squealed as you felt his fingers stretch you further. “You’re crying already, baby? I haven’t even got myself in you yet.”

“Daddy, please,” your throat was feeling raw from all the crying you were doing.

“Want your daddies to fuck your slutty holes?” you nodded fervently. “I need vocal confirmation.”

“Fuck your slutty holes! Aghh fuck yes please,” that was enough confimation for Kaminari to slide you down his body, stuffing you full of his cock with no warning, You groaned as you felt Kirishima withdraw his fingers and replace them with his girthy cock, pushing into you inch by inch. You were now panting like a bitch in heat as Kaminari pumped into you, his cock bumping into Kirishima’s within you.

“Fuck, I can feel you bro,” Kaminari didn’t slow down as he kissed your neck and fucked into you. He groaned as Kirishima started to move, pushing in whenever he pulled out. They were working in synchrony.

“Bro, look at our baby. No omega could ever take our knots like this. Isn’t that right?” Kaminari held your throat in his hands, cock pumping your pussy from beneath you.

“So fucking tight baby. Doing a good job for your alphas,” you lean down to kiss him, whining into his mouth as Kirishima spreads your ass to spear his cock into your ass at a deeper angle. Every stroke hits your walls from both holes, making your legs shake at the intensity.

You scream as you feel another orgasm attacking you, its ferocity ripping you apart as you could do nothing but lay there and cry on your alphas cocks. All the sensations were becoming too much as you tried to squirm away, making both alphas grip onto you.

“Don’t fucking run,” Kaminari growled into your ear.

“Where do you think you’re going? You’re gonna lay here and take what we fucking give you,” Kirishima breathed into your ear as he leaned over your body, his sweaty chest on your sweaty back. True to his word, they continued to fuck you through your orgasms, calling you their perfect little slut.

“Fuck, I’m not gonna last,” Kaminari was the first to cum in your pussy, making a delicious creamipe from Kirishima’s view. He reached down to your clit, stroking it hard as he groaned.

“One last time baby. I know you can uhahhh fuck fuck yes there ya go baby. All over daddy's cock,” you came over both of them, Kirishima erupting in your ass as he laid down on your back, squishing you between them as their cocks kept their cum in you.

“Don’t ever think you aren’t enough for us. You’ll always be more than enough.”

532 notes · View notes

harryskalechips · 4 years

Text

Illicit affairs Part three

A/N Hello guys! I’m sorry this part took so long. i’ve been so busy. Thank you for all the support and love. Each and every dm makes my day. I hope you like the ending idk hahaha dm me and send your thoughts! bye, I hope you enjoy

Their illicit affair isn’t really a secret anymore after being caught kissing on camera. Oh Harry, haven’t you learned not to be a romantic in public? Time to watch everything crumble down.

Tw: Cheating, smut

Thank you @harrysleftchelseaboot for letting me participate in your writing challenge! Here is part three! Any new writers or readers please check out the masterlist!

here are my prompts:

“Promise you’ll stay by my side?”

“Don’t you see I’m trying?”

“It’s okay. I understand. You can leave, they all do.”

Note: I do not condone cheating whatsoever! Please mind that this story is fictional! As much as it makes me sad to paint Harry as a cheater, it’s part of this storyline I thought of as I listened to Taylor’s album, Folklore.

Word count: 7.5k / Masterlist // Part 1 // Part 2

When a married person participates in an affair, they already know the consequences that can come out of it. Not only is it a betrayal to their spouse but every vow they said at the altar is washed away and is drowned in a pool of greed and resentment. Suddenly, their beautiful and favourite memory of their wedding day becomes a cursed thought... at least for Harry Styles.

A nightmare. A horrible nightmare that Harry never thought would come true. He sits up immediately half-naked in his sheets after his call with Y/N. He focuses on his phone, swiping through the articles written about their newly found scandal. Truthfully, he wanted to read them all but as he counted and tried to keep track of each one, he realized there were millions out there.

His wife’s screams and torturing whimpers were hurting his brain, after all, she was just a couple of rooms down the hallway. Of course, he wanted to check on her or pack a bag and leave the house but that wasn’t his main priority. It was Y/N. He could physically feel his heartache as he saw each headline along with pictures of him and her kissing in the parking lot at LAX. It was his fault. He knew it. He was too excited and happy to have Y/N back in his arms, he never thought a person working there or an undercover paparazzi would manage their way into the private area.

Was he angry? Most definitely. But there was another feeling he had in his chest that was too stubborn to leave. He hasn’t felt like this in a while. The pressure building around his body like selfish vines, continuing to wrap around him until he choked. Until all the love Y/N gave him these past months were forced to be forgotten. He could feel it from his head to his toes. The unforgettable butterflies when he thinks of Y/N are bleached and gone as his anxiety took over.

He wanted to cry and scream. His career is gone. His reputation is ruined. His fans are disappointed. His family, his friends -his wife! But most importantly, the woman who makes him the happiest man on earth is exposed to his world. The life he’s been sucked into for the last 9 years has finally sucked her in too. And that’s why he wanted to protect her from it in the first place.

When he first decided he wanted to share his talents and be famous, he never realized there was a very big price he had to pay. His privacy - his innocent and naive mind being manipulated as he networked as a new celebrity while labels were put on him that he couldn’t fight back. He loves who he is right now but that was because of her and for some time now, he wished the public could just fuck of. Sometimes he wished he was a regular guy living his own life so he wouldn’t have to deal with this bullshit.

Thinking about his wishes and his life, he almost wanted to laugh at this present moment. Was this a dream or was he right about love? Once he finally commits to a woman he loves, the universe has an odd way of returning his new deck of cards. Stupid, because that’s not how you play and it’s been unfair for him his whole life.

He had to check on Y/N.

He tosses his phone onto the bed and gets ready as he purposely ignores the device and walks out of his room. His game plan was to sneak out of the house and come back later tonight to talk to his wife. It was obvious she knew about his affair and all Harry wanted to do was avoid her.

“Sneaking out?” fuck. Harry keeps his hand on the railway as he looks behind him to see his wife standing near the wall with her arms crossed. Her eyes were swollen and her cheeks were so puffy. He wasn’t heartless. He felt bad for her.

“I was just going to get some breakfast.” Harry lies as he stares directly into her eyes. She wasn’t the same girl he married and she is no Y/N.

“You mind if you get me some too?” She nonchalantly replies, making him confused about her odd behaviour.

“Yeah, um what do you want?”

“I want to know why you fucking cheated on me.” Her calm strict tone changes into a more aggressive one as she couldn’t keep up her facade. He knew it would happen.

“Look-”

“You cheated on me and embarrassed our marriage... and um you have the fucking face to tell me you’re going out for breakfast!”

“I wanted to give you some space before we talked about it.”

“You’re a coward! You cheated at least own up to it.”

“Alright okay! I cheated on you!” Harry steps off the staircase and approaches her. They stood 7 feet apart as both of them had rigid and uncomfortable stances.

“How long?” Harry looks up at the ceiling and releases a loud breath.

“Approximately a year.”

“I can’t believe you.” She cries silently as she looks at him in disappointment. She quickly wipes her tears away, knowing that her dignity is already in the ruins because of him. “I know I haven’t been a good wife to you but you haven’t been a good husband. I just never realized you gave up on our marriage already.”

“Are you joking? A couple of months after our wedding you’ve been the one acting cold! I loved you so much but I realized what we had isn’t who we are anymore.” Harry confesses in an agitated tone.

“Harry after our wedding -You became busy not me! I tried telling you and giving you signs but you ignored me. I explicitly told you and you said you were in a good position in your career where you had so much potential… so I gave you space!”

“I tried reaching out to you so we can spend time together.” Harry furrows his eyebrows at her. “Don’t make me seem like the bad guy here. I was waiting for you to tell me you wanted to work our relationship out again. I gave you space!”

“I shouldn’t be the one to do that, Harry!” She pauses. “As time went by, I realized I didn’t need you as much anymore but I wanted to see what would happen if we stayed together. I still loved you!”

“You stop prioritizing us.”

“You did it first.” She scoffs as she takes her silk robe off her, leaving her in a short nightgown. She was so angry, she needed to find a way to cool off. “You think I’m stupid? I knew you were seeing someone the moment you started taking that ring off. I just thought you had the common courtesy not to humiliate us and our careers -to not give up on what we signed up for. Our marriage.”

“So you’re saying you were throwing a fit in your bedroom because I got caught?” Harry steps back a bit. He never realized how fucked up this relationship was.

“Obviously! What do you think I want in the papers? Not your affair with that college whore!”

“Watch your mouth.” Harry deepens his voice as he stares at her intently. “This scandal was not my intention. I’m not stupid like that.”

“Well, you’re stupid enough to get caught!” She rebuttals. She turns around walking to his room as she angrily tugs on the ends of her hair. “I don’t care what you do with your life but you should’ve thought about me and what would happen if anyone found out about our broken marriage.” She opens his walk-in closet and enters, leaving Harry to trail behind her. Without any hesitation, her hands begin to carelessly toss his clothes on the floor, knowing his favourite boots were to be specifically thrown at the wall. She was fuming.

“We had an image to carry and you ruined it because you couldn’t keep your hands to yourself in public!”

…

“Y/N, I’m so glad you made it in today. I hope the paparazzi in front of the building didn’t hassle you too much.” Rob enters the meeting room and greets her in a sarcastic tone. “Unfortunately, they’ve been quite a nuisance for the rest of your co-workers.” He places a blank manila folder on the table and sits himself down as he looks at her in a serious manner. Y/N felt like she was being tortured, having just them in the room. “Paul will be coming in shortly, he has to deal with publicity first.” He was the one who called her. She barely saw him these past years as she worked more for Rob here at Columbia Records but she knew he was just as powerful after all, he was the company’s president.

“They’ve been following me around ever since I left my apartment. Look, Rob, I’m sorry about-”

“Hold that statement. You shouldn’t be sorry.” His finger raises in the air. Y/N watches him carefully as he opens the folder in front of them.

There… it had pictures of her infamous kiss with Harry, recent articles about the two of them and… her employment contracts.

“You shouldn’t be sorry,” Rob repeats himself as he picks out the photo of them kissing and slides it to her on the table. “I’m sorry.”

“What?” Y/N couldn’t believe this. She knew what was to come but she didn’t want to think it was true! This was her dream job and it was all going to be ripped away from her as if the last 3 years meant nothing to them.

“I have to let you go.”

“Rob, there’s nothing in my contract that says I can’t have a relationship with a co-worker.” Y/N remembers reading that bullet point when she first started her internship at Columbia records. Although it may have been years, that rule couldn’t possibly change.

“I think you’re forgetting Harry isn’t your co-worker but our client.” Another voice answers. Paul opens the door as he hears what she says. He takes the pen from the pocket on the left side of his chest and instantly picks up her contract and circles that point in red. She definitely forgot about that. She finally remembers how months ago she was reading her contract as she sipped her… 3rd glass of wine.

“Oh.”

“Not just that but any employee that has publicly put our company on blast in front of the media requires immediate dismissal,” Rob adds in.

“Also It’s nice to see you again Ms. L/N.” Paul, a short middle-aged man sits beside Paul. “I had to deal with your mess outside. It’s getting out of control.” He adjusts his tie. “You do understand what actions we must take now?” He asks sternly, barely looking at her as he briefly reads her contract.

“No, wait! It was a picture that I didn’t know about! Paul...Rob, please don’t do this. I’m so grateful to be working here.” She pleads.

“I’m sorry Y/N. I wish you told me about this sooner so we could have figured something out.” Rob shakes his head in disappointment. “He’s married you know that. The damage control is more than what you guys could have possibly thought of.”

“I never meant for any of this to happen. Rob, I’m sorry. I truly am.” Y/N begins to cry again as if she wasn’t crying on her drive here.

“Let me be honest, I don’t want to let you go but I need to be fair. Our vision statement is to take care of our stars. With the disgrace of your affair being exposed, you can’t continue to work here while Harry is our client. He has a fixed contract so I can’t do anything to help you out.”

“I get it” She pauses a bit as she tries to take everything in. “I think I should leave.” Y/N abruptly stands up and wipes her tears. She walks forward to give Paul a handshake. She then turns to a standing Rob but he ignores her hand and gives her a hug instead.

“You have so much potential. I’m sorry your journey with us ends here.”

“Never knew you were a lying whore.” Jasmine murmurs under her breath as she walks past Y/N in the office.

It sucked. It truly did. Y/N could feel all eyes on her as she walked to her office to clean things up. It’s crazy how she used to feel so intimidated walking in these hallways, then after receiving a platinum job offer, she became confident. Now, she’s just embarrassed and ashamed as she packed her things up.

She tried her best to hold in her tears as she picked each picture frame off her bookshelf. “Everyone hates you, you know.” She looks to the left to see her close friend here from work, at her door.

“I know.” She bites her lip as she can feel tears forming in her eyes once again. Why can’t she stop crying? “You can insult me all you want. I’ve been receiving death threats all day from people I don’t know.” She looks down again and places random books in her bin.

“Is he the guy you were talking about a week ago or was this something that started in London.”

“We were together for a year until we broke things off a couple of months ago.” Y/N confesses as she wraps her arms around herself. Marissa carefully walks inside the room and approaches her. Without another word, she hugs Y/N very tightly.

“I’m going to miss you around here.” That’s all she said. It gave Y/N a mixed message because she didn’t know if their friendship ended here along with her potential career. A short message like that made her more upset.

To be frank, Marissa didn’t know what to feel. She understood Y/N and Harry. But the affair? If her husband did that to her, she could never forgive them. Maybe that’s how a lot of people see it. Not only was this a betrayal of a spouse but a betrayal of integrity to everyone they know.

And because of this, Marissa made the choice to keep her distance from this sweet girl. How betrayed and played she felt as her co-worker was sleeping with their married client behind the world’s back.

Y/N was a big mess. Her apartment used to be neat and organized as that’s how she is as a person but after coming home from work, scattered objects from her boxes laid lonely on her chestnut floors.

She sat on along with them, drinking from the bottle of red wine as she read through articles and mean tweets about her. The only hope she had was for Harry to come and comfort her.

The sad thing is… he hasn’t answered any of her texts or calls since she broke the news to him this morning. Funny enough, the display on her screen changed to a call and as she hoped it was Harry...it was her mother calling.

“Hello?” Y/N answer as she feels her cheeks become wet again. She was so embarrassed to talk to her mom. What does her mother think of her now?

“How have you been, baby?” Thankfully, she wasn’t angry but worried about her well being.

“Everyone hates me, mom. How am I supposed to find a job now.”

“You can come back home and I’ll take care of you.”

“I don’t want to leave LA.” Y/N feels her heart die a bit. LA was her dream. She wanted to make so many memories here. The only thing she gained was a reputation for being a man’s whore. She isn’t ready to leave and move back under her mom’s roof. After all her roof means her conservative rules.

“I think you need to.” Her mother pauses. “Have you spoken to that celebrity yet?”

“Yes.” Y/N lies. She didn’t want to feel worst, knowing Harry was purposely avoiding her.

“What did he say?”

“We’re going to talk about it soon.”

“Do you love him?” Her mother shoots out another question after the last one. She genuinely wanted to know how her daughter was but she couldn’t deny the disappointing feeling buried in her chest.

“Yes.”

“How long were you guys together?”

“A year?”

“Does he have children?”

“No.”

“Why do you think your value is cheap to be sleeping with a married man?”

“Mom!” Y/N eyes widen at the candid question.

“I’m not trying to hate on you Y/N. I just want to know why you let yourself be in this position.” Her mother lets out a sigh. “Do you think anyone will want to hire you after this scandal? Why couldn’t you wait until he got a divorce?”

“I love him.”

“He manipulated you!”

“No, he didn’t.” She pulls the phone away from her face due to being so irritated. “I thought you called me because you wanted to check up on me -Not to hate on my decisions!” She immediately hangs up the call and lays down on her floor.

Today has got be the worst day of her life.

It was the next morning after their affair was exposed and no one was feeling good. The rhythmic pattern of knocks on Y/N’s door wakes her up. She somehow managed to fall asleep on the floor last night leaving her to sit up and glance through her curtains to see the paparazzi loitering around downstairs. Letting out a sigh, she stands up and opens the door. Thankfully, she knew it was Harry from the way he knocked -which made her feel a whole lot better.

She opens the door and catches sight of him in front of her. Hope fills her eyes immediately as she quickly yanks him inside. Without another waste of breath, they hug each other so tightly. “Where were you? You weren’t answering my calls all day.” She mumbles into his shoulder. His arms wrapped around her, making her remember the little bubble they used to have before.

At least she knew they were safe here inside her apartment.

“I’m sorry. I had to speak to Jeff and handle my wife all day.” He pulls away and holds her face in his hands. “Y/N baby, I’m sorry for everything.”

“It’s okay.” She shakes her head and grabs his hand so she can lead them to her couch. “ Come sit down. How did you find your way into the building without getting caught?”

“I think you forgot I’m a pro at coming over here without getting seen.” He gives a small smile as he looks around her messy living room. “Did you sleep in here last tonight?” The throw blanket and tiny blue pillow on the floor catches his eye.

“Sorry about the mess.” She pulls her hand away from his. She fixes her hair as she manages to move the boxes out of the way. “I did yeah. Fell asleep.” Y/N bit her lip in anxiety. She was scared to tell him she lost her job because of their relationship.

“These boxes...” He continues to sit on the couch. He picks up a frame from one of them only to realize it was from her office. “Were you fired, Y/N?” His tone of voice automatically changing into a serious one.

“Well, I went to the meeting Paul called me in for yesterday. Luckily, I saw Ro-”

“Answer my question.” He deadly stares at her while the frame in his hand is gripped tightly in his fist.

“Yes.” Harry immediately stands up and reaches behind his pocket to grab his phone. “Wait, what are you doing?”

“I’m calling them, obviously.” He scratches his nose and glances at the window. As he held his phone to his ear on one side, he quickly walked around her apartment closing all her curtains. He keeps his standing stance once he finds himself back in the living room, leaving Y/N to sit on the couch and watch him.

“Harry, hang up.” She suggests as she watches his every move. “Please, stop.”

“Y/N, they fired you.” He tosses his phone to the floor after being ignored by the company. “They can’t do that!”

“Yes, they can. We um...I uh... I broke rules from my contract.”

“Fuck, Y/N.” She could see how broken he was from hearing that. He stressfully runs his hand through his hair as he looks at her. “I’m sorry for kissing you in the parking lot.”

“It’s not your fault.” She bites her cheek as she looks down at her hands. In all honestly, she did feel some sort of anger towards him -maybe because she just lost her job.

“Are you mad at me?” Harry sits down beside her and guides her to straddle him. She immediately complies and wraps her arms around his neck. She rests her cheek against his chest as she feels a tear run down her face. Hopefully, he doesn’t feel it.

“It’s just...Why are you married?” She fixes her position while she feels his fingers slide underneath her sweatshirt. She lets out a sigh and rubs her face against his thick shirt. “I mean why out of all the days we knew each other, we started out like this? Why did I have to meet you and fall in love?” She lets out her frustrated confession.

“I don’t regret anything.” Harry takes a hard swallow and kisses her temple. She immediately sits up and looks at him with a surprised look on her face.

“I lost my job and possibly my whole career!”

“Baby hey look,” He tightens his hold on her waist. “You’re not the only one. My career is obviously not doing well too. My fans are disappointed at me and I have this huge scandal on my back.”

“The only difference is you have money.” She crosses her arms. Harry gives her a strange look and sits up a bit.

“I don’t think we’re understanding each other.” He rests his hands by his side. “I don’t regret meeting you and falling in love. I don’t regret coming here every night to fall asleep beside you. You make me happy and if there is one thing I realized after our break up, it’s that I love you so much. You never stopped driving me crazy.”

“I’m sorry.” She shakes her head and pouts. “I’m just scared.” She breaks down in front of him. “You mean so much to me. I don’t want to lose you again. Now that I know we’re both fighting for each other, I don’t want to give up.”

“I don’t want to either.” He hugs her tightly. “You’re mine and I’m yours. We’re going to get through this despite what happened.”

“Harry.” Rob greets him since he’s already sitting at the table with the rest of their team. As Harry walked in with his coffee, he noticed the empty seat in front of his. That definitely made him angrier more than he thought.

Instead of greeting everyone with a smile or a handshake, he says nothing and sits down. Today was a serious meeting, so he decided to wear a casual suit. He fixes his blazer and rubs his chin. “Let’s get started,” he speaks up in a monotone voice.

Jasmine speaks up after making eye contact with Rob. “Your name has been trending for the past few days so as Y/N’s.”

“I think I would know that.” He gives her cut eye and rolls his eyes at the end. He remembered last night, Y/N told him what she said to her. If only, he could get her fired.

“Harry, Tour starts in a month. Should we continue with it?” Rob asks.

“Yes.” He folds his hands on the table, trying to not look at the empty chair.

“But your reputation-”

“I want to release a public statement.”

“I think that’s a good idea but what could you possibly say that can help your fans understand your cheat-” Jasmine gets cut off again by Harry.

“Jasmine stop.” He takes a sip of his coffee. Everyone’s eyes widen at his tone.

“Harry, do you know what you want to say?” Darlene, his publicist asks. Jeff stayed silent as he listened to the conversation. Harry quickly glances at him before continuing on.

“I’ll write everything myself and upload them on my social platforms when I’m ready.”

After the meeting ended, Harry stayed in his seat as he watched everyone leave. It was different knowing he would never see Y/N be one of them ever again. Marissa stalls a bit, cleaning up her papers as she looked up and spoke to him. “Shouldn’t you go to Rob’s office so you can join his meeting with Jeff?” Harry nods his head but doesn’t move.

“How is she?” She genuinely asks him. He looks at her and plays with the pen in his hand.

“She’s been locked up inside her apartment for the past two days.” He was too, to be honest. He only left her building to change at his house and come to this meeting. Lately, they’ve been spending as much time together.

“Can you please tell her I love her?” Marissa leans her hip on the table and quickly wipes away a tear. “I understand her. I just feel a bit betrayed at the moment.”

“Okay.” He sits immediately and pulls out his phone. “I’m going to head to Rob’s now but I hope you girls stay friends. She doesn’t um exactly have anybody except for me.” She nods her head and walks around the table to give him a hug.

“Take care of her, Harry.”

Harry’s hands were shaking as he was about to post his message about his cheating scandal for millions to see. He did feel a bit reassured by Rob and Jeff, however. They promised him, they would try their best to fix his reputation and keep him and Y/N out of the media after this blows over. Since he still had two more years with Columbia, Rob also told him he would switch Jasmine out of his team. Maybe things will go well after a while?

Posted 7:18 PM

A/N Bruh if this picture is blurry fuck I'm going to stuff my fist down my throat. I’ll just repost the message here hahah booooo! where are my tomatoes?

harrystyles To my fans, to the people who know me and most importantly to my wife I’m sorry. Nothing can excuse the reason why I cheated. Secretly behind the cameras, my marriage was already on a rocky path that she and I made the choice not to fix. We began to drift away from one another after a couple months in our marriage. With strong denial, both of us chose to let it be and continue the negative impact that was affecting us both. In 2017, I met an intern at my label who I never thought would change my life. I’m sorry that you all had to find out this way. Never in my life would I have thought I would be the man who cheats on his wife but please understand my marriage was broken from the very beginning. I’m not trying to hand out excuses to you all but instead, share an insight into what my life is. It’s hard to have eyes watching me every day without them knowing anything about me. No one will understand how I felt and what dilemmas and issues I’ve been through but that’s okay. I spoke to my wife and we have decided to officially separate as we realized it was time. Cheating is never okay and I understand if you are angry at me or choose to unfollow me. I will forever be grateful for your support as I continue my journey in life. Y/N, I love you. Thank you for being my rock this past year. I’m sorry for all the hurt you’ve been going through. I know you don’t deserve this because you’re the most genuine and sweetest girl I adore. You’re my soulmate and I wouldn't be as happy as I was without you. H

“Are you really going to go?” Y/N bit the sleeve of her sweater as she sat on her bed watching Harry pack his clothes into his luggage. After this past week, he was able to pick most of his stuff up from his house. Now Y/N’s apartment was more claustrophobic than usual. A couple of days ago, he also posted his statement. Luckily most of his fans understood him, even though there is still some backlash about it.

“I disappointed my fans enough. I think I should.” He itches his nose and sits down beside her. “You’re going to be a good girl for me while I’m gone right.” Her cheeks turn red as she shyly nods.

“I’ll miss you.”

“I’m going to miss you too.” he kisses her

“I need to find a job or else my mom is going to cut me off and make me move back home.”

“I’ll figure something out. Don’t worry about it.” He kisses her neck. “Did you forget your boyfriend is a mega-millionaire?”

“He’s also married.” She teases him back. Fortunately, her anxiety hasn’t been that bad due to Harry being by her side 24/7. She was getting used to being in their bubble all the time.

“Not in 6 months.” his tongue dips out of his mouth as he gives her little kisses on her chest. “You’re really beautiful did you know that?”

“I think you’re gorgeous.” She bites her lip as she takes in the smell of his cologne on her pillow. It’s been nice waking up to him every morning. Something she has not been able to really do ever since they started seeing each other.

“Mmm, really.” He looks up her at her as he slowly raises her thin T-shirt. “Are you trying to get some extra brownie points before I leave?” He kisses her belly button.

“Maybe?” She squints her eyes and smiles at him.

“I love you, Y/N. I hope you know that.”

“I love you.” She reaches for him again so they can kiss. His hands quickly hold onto her waist as she sits up and tries to remove his shirt. “You’re going to be leaving me again” She whispers to him while she stares into his green eyes.

“I’ll be thinking of you every day.”

“Without you, I’m scared. Promise you’ll stay by my side.”

“I’ll check on you daily. I got you as long as you got me.” He gives her a cheesy smile making her eyes light up. He leans down to kiss her once more as he guides her to lay down on the bed. “Remember the first time I fucked you? On your dining room table.”

“Mhm.” Y/N hums as she feels his hands take off her shorts.

“How about that time after we got back together and I ate you out on the plane?”

“Harry.” She bites her lip while she watches him rub his two fingers on her wet center.

“You’re such a good girl for daddy yeah?” He slips his fingers underneath the fabric then gives it a taste. “I’m going to miss the way you like crazy baby.” he bits his lip as he sits on his knees. He takes her legs and opens them a bit wider. His hands roam her body as if this was the last time they were going to be together.

“I want you now.” She lifts her shirt up as she watches Harry grope her breasts.

“Patience bub.” He smirks at her as his hands take her underwear off. “You’re my baby.” He softly bites her nipple. “My precious girl.” He kisses the spot where her heart is. “I think you were made for me.”

She smiles softly as she kisses the same spot on his body. “You deserve the world.”

“Aw fuck. I‘m so in love with you.” He smiles so happily as he looks up at her ceiling. He’s never felt like this with anyone except for her. It’s everything about her that reels her in. Her smile, her soft personality, her sweet kisses, and her loving soul. How did he miss out on her before?

“Well, don’t just say it. Show me.”

It’s been a month since Harry left for tour and although he promised to check on her every day -it stopped.

At first, Y/N thought nothing about it. After all, maybe he’s just busy with his shows (you know since he’s touring the world but after a while, he stopped answering her texts. That’s when she knew he was doing it on purpose.

At the moment, she was working at an art gallery in East Los Angeles. Luckily, she was working in the offices upstairs sorting their finances. It was hard at first finding a job and that was something she never told Harry.

Every record label and management wanted nothing to do with her. Y/N could barely leave the house without a group of girls whispering behind her back. Lastly, she still had new recent paparazzi pictures of her on daily mail.

Without Harry, she felt lonely and excluded from everyone else in Los Angeles. She still cried herself to sleep on some nights because she just felt like an overall disappointment.

Knocks on her door make her confused as she cooked herself some lunch in the kitchen. Dusting her hands off on her apron, she lets go of her knife and tomato and heads to the foyer.

“Hello.” There she was. In real life. Harry’s ex-wife. Y/N has only seen her once and now that it was her second time, she still felt intimidated.

“Hi.” Y/N unties her apron and hooks it on the hook beside her. She felt insecure to be in such a lousy outfit compared to her boyfriend’s supermodel ex-wife.

“I’m sorry I came out of the blue. I got your address from my assistant and I wanted to speak to you.”

“Oh, that’s okay. Come inside. Did you see any paparazzi.”

“Harry told me to go through the back.” Does she still speak to Harry? He’s been ignoring me for a few days now.

��Um Okay. Would you like anything?”

“No.” She gives a soft smile as she looks around her apartment. She eyes Harry sweater laying on the other couch and takes a swallow. “I wanted to see you face to face than through call. Plus I wanted to see the apartment my husband would sneak off to every night.”

“I’m sorry about what Harry and I did to you.”

“Don’t mention it.” She shakes her head. “You’re just sorry because you got caught.” Y/N’s eyes widen. “I didn’t come here to fight with you. I came here to get some closure so I can move on with my life. We sold our house in hidden hills. Although my marriage was broken I think being publicly humiliated was traumatizing enough.”

“I understand.” she tucks her hair behind her ear.

“Do you love him?”

“Yes.”

“Does he make you feel special? Make you feel like your the only girl in the world?” She eyes her apartment once more. “Does he fuck you until you forget your own name?”

“I’m sorry what the fuck.” Y/N stands up and crosses her arms. “What are doing here? Get to the point.”

“I’m just here to tell you that whatever he makes you feel right now, it’s going to disappear. After all, he’s famous. He can have anything in the world. It won’t take too long until he gets tired of you.”

“Get out of my apartment.”

“You should’ve gotten out of my marriage before you weaselled yourself in bitch!”

“Leave!” Y/N shouts. As she takes the woman’s Gucci bag and throws it towards her door. After she left, Y/N couldn’t help but cry and lose her appetite for lunch.

I’m a whore. I’m a whore. I’m nothing but a whore.

She was starting to get used to having a pale life. Where there were no butterflies or colours. No new exciting promotions or scenarios at work. Now she adapted to a routine of eat, sleep and repeat.

What sparked her day differently today, however, was the arms wrapped around her as she woke up in her sheets. It was him.

“Harry?” She slowly opens her eyes as she turns onto her back to see him half-awake as he laid down on the pillow beside her.

“Hi.” He gives her a soft smile.

“What are you doing here?” She sits up and looks at her phone. “Don’t you have a show tomorrow in Canada?”

“Mhm. I missed you though.” He pulls himself closer to her and kisses her arm.

“You’ve been ignoring my texts this past week.” She pushes her arm off him and pouts.

“That’s because I was busy and I was scared I might tell you my little secret a bit too early.”

“What?”

“Get dressed.”

Y/N kept silent as she watched Harry drive in his car. She sat in the passenger seat observing the way he drove. One of his hands on the wheel as the other held her hand. The shades on his eyes resting so pretty on the bridge of his nose. He was such a dream to look at.

“How have you been, baby? How’s that job at the art gallery?” He glances at her before pulling his hand away so he can take a bite out of her bagel. It was the early morning so the sun was just about to rise as they continue to drive forward.

“It’s been boring. No one has been really talking to me. If they do, they ask if I can get you to meet them.” She rolls her eyes and takes his arm so she can take a bite of the bread in his hand.

“Your boyfriend is famous? He can’t be that popular?”

“He was actually trending for a few days.” She smiles. “How have you been?”

“I’m still getting shit from my management because of what happened a month ago.” He takes another bite of the bagel as he keeps his eyes on the road. “You know, I think if the gossip sources would stop talking about it, everyone could move on. This is about us not them. They’re just judging us without any mercy.”

“I know.” Y/N thinks back about the death threats flooding her Instagram dms.

“We’re here.” Harry signals his light as he turns into a long-hidden driveway. Suddenly a big beautiful white home comes into view. Y/N never thought houses this big would be in Malibu.

“Who’s house is this?” She asks as she gazes at the beautiful sunset behind the home. The ocean was beautiful as the sunlight reflected against it. Harry ignores her as they both approach the main door.

Y/N was waiting for him to knock or call the owner but instead, he opens it. “Harry, you can’t do that!” He smiles and looks at her.

“Why not?” He walks in and looks straight at the big window showing the water.

“This isn’t your house.”

“True.” He shrugs his shoulders and turns himself towards her. He takes his hands and rests them on her waist.

“Then uh who’s is it?” She widens her eyes and looks around the beautiful big home.

“It’s ours.”

“What? Is this why you’ve been ignoring my texts?” he nods as she jumps into his arms.

“I was a bit busy decorating a new home and running a world tour.”

“I love you. I hope you know that.” She gives a small smile and hides her face in his chest.

“I love you too baby.” He smiles and spins her around. “I’m sorry for all the shit I put you through.”

“It’s okay. Thank you for the new home.” she pulls away and looks at the view in front of them. She takes a big gulp and looks at him.

And as much as Harry thought this was his happy ending with the girl he loves, he never took into account how much their exposed affair has impacted her.

He never realized that she didn’t want to stay in California anymore. That she feels like a new stranger in this life that she built. That her dream career was taken away from her. What’s going to happen? Can love truly sustain them both as reality continues to stuff their consequences down their throats?

“As much as I want to live here with you here, Harry… I don’t think I can. I don’t think I’m ready.”

“Y/N.” Harry was not expecting that answer. “It will be like the usual you know, you already know what to expect.” He tries to convince her.

“No, I won’t.” She shakes her head. Why does she have to always be the one to ruining things for them? Maybe, because on the inside, she feels like a house can’t make her feel better about her new life? “You’re going to be gone most of the time. What happens if we end up like your marriage?”

“Don’t you see I’m trying?” He speaks a bit more in a serious tone. “I know with your new job you won’t be able to live in your shoebox apartment without your mum’s help. I want to take care of you!”

“What are people going to think? You’re living with your mistress!”

“Fuck what people think! I thought you said we were going to be in this together.” He was confused. Why couldn’t she just live with him in this house he bought for her.

“Harry, I did say that and I still do but don’t force me to move in with you. I’m not ready.”

“What can possibly be holding you back?” His voice softens.

“My life is falling apart and being picked every day!” She rubs her eyes in frustration.

“Everyone knows we’re together, isn’t that what you wanted.”

“Not like this, Harry. You know that.”

“Yeah, I do but it happened. Now we can just be together despite what they say about our cheating scandal.”

“No one wants to hire me” She looks at him again with disappointment in her eyes.

“You have a job already at the gallery. What do you mean?”

“The owner owes a favour to my mom but I can’t use anything useful with all the experience I have. Every management and label rejected me before I could even get an interview.”

“Are you saying all of this is my fault.” He scoffs. “Y/N, it's a job. There are tons more out there that you can use your experience for.”

“I don’t think you understand how important my job was to me.”

“The job that I got you?” He sarcastically replies back. “I’ll try and get you-”

“Shut up.” She rolls her eyes.

“Okay fine, you don’t want to move in with me. Where do we go from here?” He lets out a sigh and looks around the home. He was mad they weren’t going to live here but he didn’t want her to leave him.

“I don’t know.”

“It’s okay. I understand. You can leave, they all do.” Y/N immediately looks away from the window and looks at him instead.

“Who said I was leaving. I love you.” She raises her hand next to his. “We can wait until I feel like I’m ready to start a new chapter.”

“Actually I have a plan.” He smiles mischievously at her and pulls her out of the home.

Thankfully, Harry brought her to a hidden beach where they could spend some time together after being apart for so long. They spent hours talking about their lives and new things they haven’t shared with each other before.

Y/N even told him everything about how she’s been feeling these past few days. She came to the decision that Los Angeles isn’t for her anymore. And although she would love to live with Harry, she needed to figure out her life first. After all, this was her only serious relationship.

And because he was so understanding and patient with her after he learned about everything she was hiding from him. He made sure to be the boyfriend he should’ve been a year ago.

That’s when she knew he had to marry her.

2 years later…

“Harry!” Y/N calls him from the stairs.

It’s been two years since they began to date publicly after their affair was exposed. Luckily a few months after, his divorce was finalized and the media laid off their backs.

Now the couple lives happily together in their new home but it isn’t in Malibu but instead his home in London where he first brought her to. It’s were they made up and realized that they belong to each other -this had to be their home. And suddenly it felt like London belonged to them where they can start a new chapter in their lives. There was barely any paparazzi here and everyone accepted Y/N with open arms, especially Anne.

“What’s wrong, babe?” He runs down the stairs with a gym towel on his shoulder.

“Take Evelyn please.” She gently gives their 1-year-old baby to her Finacé. “I have to run down the office. Louis needs me.”

Funny enough when they moved to London, a job offer was presented to her from Harry’s bandmate Louis Tomlinson. Due to their long term time hiatus from the band, he decided to start his own management company and help aspiring artists start their journey off in the right hands.

Now, Y/N worked as a marketing agent for the company. Although there was no Rob or Marissa, she did find herself having more memories here at fearless management.

Maybe the only thing left to do is get married?

You taught me a secret language

I can't speak with anyone else

And you know damn well

For you, I would ruin myself

A million little times

#Harry Styles #harrystylesfanfic #harry styles angst #harry styles smut #harry styles fluff #cheating!harry #husband!harry #onedirection fanfic #onedirection one shots #harrystyles oneshots #harrystyles imagines #harry styles fanfiction #harrystylesstories #solo harry #soft!y/n #harry styles one direction #one direction #fanfiction

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clarythericebot · 3 years

Text

potential internal conflicts/character arcs for nhie s2

(based on the table read, news, and things that i personally just want to see :P)

- Devi learning to see others as ends of themselves instead of means to an end. No-brainer that this is going to be a theme next season (especially with that pros and cons list of her love interest), but I’m so excited to see how the show’s going to handle it. As I rambled about on this post, one of Devi’s biggest developments as a character was to stop treating Ben as an extension of herself (either as boxing him into the role of Antagonist/Nemesis in her own narrative or as a hateful mirror that points out personal traits she dislikes) and as an actual person and friend, and it’s that which sparks the small epiphany of her feelings towards him. From the table read and the stills, though, it sounds like she might be putting him in a new, albeit prettier box: Love Interest. The same box that she puts in Paxton, who at this point also does have genuine feelings for Devi. She’s looking at them as experiences, not people, and it’s all going to inevitably blow up in her face.

- The Devi/Fabiola/Eleanor friendship changing somehow. I had this impression that all season 1, the three of them have been hanging on to a dynamic that just doesn’t work anymore, in light of Devi’s grief, Eleanor’s abandonment, and Fabiola’s identity conflict. While Devi is definitely in the wrong of blatantly choosing a guy’s inconvenience over her best friend’s weightier problems, I think the larger problem here is that they don’t seem to know how to be there for each other for difficulties larger than to do with school, although the care and concern is there. It actually takes a third party to push them towards solving the overarching issues in their friendship, and even then only briefly. I’d really like to see this explored as a conflict shared between the three of them, instead of it being sidelined completely as Devi being selfish.

- The narrative that Devi will tell Princeton + the parts of herself she’s willing to take to college. (These are technically two conflicts, but I feel like it would make sense to intertwine them, especially since they’ve already been intertwined in the Ganesh Puja episode.) Devi has expressed her intention about leaving her Indian-ness completely and utterly behind her, as well as all the other embarrassing and painful parts of her identity (her grief and her insecurities). She’s come to terms with her father’s death to an extent, but she doesn’t seem to have yet accepted how his death has shaped and marked her. I think this is going to extend with how she deals with her Indian identity, and perhaps how she deals with her relationships.

- The double-standard between Kamala and Devi. On one level I understand Nalini probably treats them different because of her differing relationships with them—one’s her niece that only came to live with them and the other is her only child, her whole family. On the other hand, from the narration Devi has never really experienced her mother expressing such a blatant double standard in favor of Kamala before (about her secret boyfriend); she fully believed her cousin would get into trouble. It never did get addressed.

- In the first season, we experienced how Kamala’s western ideals influenced the part of her life still infused with tradition (her relations to other Indian people and her arranged marriage). The still of Kamala in a labcoat makes me hopeful for the inverse this season: how Kamala’s arranged marriage and traditional ideals affect her career as a scientist.

- Paxton engaging in the fact that he likes someone who is smarter than him (at least in a bookish sense). I’ve never seen this conflict delved into before—most writers just ignore it, focusing on what the love interests have in common (and don’t get me wrong, I’m looking forward to Paxton engaging Devi in this way, either by trying new things or revealing some hobbies or interests we haven’t made privy to). This insecurity is so close to his chest, though, and as much as Devi seems to make a point not to make him feel bad about it, it would be fascinating friction since Devi is very rightfully proud of her intellectual prowess. I imagine this will only be accentuated with knowing that his competition for Devi’s affections is someone razor-edge smart.

- Ben’s anger, and it being dealt with in constructive and destructive ways. I think one of the (numerous) things that I love about Ben and Devi is that they have different approaches to their internal and external conflicts. Devi runs away internally, refusing to face grief and sadness, while she delves head-first into external situations (e.g. asking Paxton to have sex with her, going to a Model UN trip with absolutely no prep and being willing to steal alcohol, talking to her friend’s estranged mom in other to get back into said friend’s good graces). Ben, on the other hand, has remarkable emotional intelligence underneath his high school immaturity (he can read Devi beyond her words actions, he doesn’t deny the isolation and loneliness that he feels, he is prepared to be vulnerable in certain situations) but he doesn’t do anything about it (he stops himself from telling his parents how abandoned he feels, he gives in to his girlfriend essentially using him as a prop, he is ushered into dining in his nemesis’ house by her concerned mother). Then Devi kisses him, and suddenly he’s willing to put his eggs in one basket. He stands up to his parents and demands that they spend family dinner together—because of her, he claims. He breaks up with his girlfriend, finally admitting that what they had wasn’t real, and earnestly informing Devi that he thinks what they have is. “I’m all in,” he tells her, thus crushing my heart. Because what’s strongly being implied, at least by the first part of the first episode, is that Devi’s either going to choose Paxton or neither of them. I imagine that Ben, used to being abandoned time and time again, will not react well to that. (This is expanded in this really awesome meta by @catty-words). There’s potential for the show to frame this as sexist entitlement, but I’d like to hope that the creators will be more compassionate to Ben’s conflict, as they have been in the past. It would genuinely be hurtful for someone you’ve displayed a lot of vulnerability to suddenly turn tail and say it didn’t mean as much to her. My guess is that he’ll lock into their nemesis status quo from before and lean into it hard, and it will likely hurt him badly. What I’d also like to see, though, (if only to assuage my own heartbreak) is him taking steps to deal with this a little more constructively, in addition to the inevitable self-destruction. I’d love to see him get back in touch with his ride-or-die middle school friends or even make new ones. In fact, I suspect that’s who the character of Aneesa is going to be, regardless of whether she becomes a contender for his love interest.

Aneesa is described as someone whose confidence and radiance will pose an immediate threat to Devi. I doubt that means she’ll be another academic rival, at least not completely; Devi already has Ben for that. As for romantic rivalry, it is likely not going to be Paxton Aneesa will be paired with, since it’ll only be a rehash of Devi’s insecurities of Paxton liking ‘hotter’ girls like Zoe and vying for his attention. (There’s a possibility she and Paxton will have history together and that threatens Devi even if she’s already in a relationship with him, but for me, that’s a less interesting choice than letting Devi focus on the challenges that will be inherent with Paxton being her boyfriend.) I think Aneesa will be another mirror for Devi—who she could have been if she pursued friendship and openness and maybe even a relationship with Ben, and that’s likely going to make Devi bitterly jealous. If this results in friendship and openness and maybe even a relationship for Ben (a deeper, more genuine one than his previous), I’m completely here for it, even if I am still hoping for a Bevi endgame.

(Low-key theorizing that Ben's smiling at Aneesa here, btw)

#clary scribbles #nhie meta #ben gross #devi vishwakumar #devi x ben #nalini vishwakumar #kamala nandiawada #paxton hall yoshida #never have i ever

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ghostbustermelanieking · 3 years

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some thoughts on mag 200

i’ve been having trouble articulating this, but i wanted to get some thoughts down on mag 200, and the ending of tma as a whole, now that i’ve heard the finale twice and had some time to process it all. putting this under a cut in case people don’t wanna see it -- there’s gonna be a lot of praise here, but also some legit criticism. this is a way to sort through my feelings more than anything else.

first off, relistening to the finale, and sitting on it for a while, has made me feel a hell of a lot better about the whole thing. the episode comes off a lot better when you’re not vibrating with fear and anticipation, in my opinion. the final statement was very fitting and cool -- not my favorite ever, but i can appreciate it a lot as a final closing for the fears. and i don’t have an ear for soundscaping but the sound in that statement was cool as hell. the jonah magnus gets fucking murdered scene is incredibly satisfying. a lot of other people have said this, but i love that jon finally got his revenge, and was able to lash out against jonah for all the years of manipulation and beng used, and for tim and sasha and everything else. that was perfect. i genuinely thought we might not get a scene like this after 193 but i am so glad we did. incredibly satisfying. the girls made it out!! i am very glad that they’re ok and moving on and seem to be leaning on each other. (By God I Will Wring Found Family Out Of This Podcast If It Kills Me.) and the admiral’s okay. love that

and the jonmartin ending. oh my god. while i was never the biggest fan of the possibility of martin having to kill jon, the way it went down was so painful and good. i loved that final scene. i love the ambiguity -- that they might have died but maybe they didn’t, maybe they’re all right and happy and we can decide for ourselves -- i love that i got exactly what i wanted, that i get to have my cake and eat it too, all the angst of a jmart death and still the possibility of happiness... i am going buckwild. i love it. the longer i spend with this ending, the happier i am with it. i really really loved it

on another note... i do have some reservations about the finale and the season as a whole. i understand peoples’ irritations with the finale, and while i’m trying to focus on the things i did like, i definitely have some irritations. for one, i definitely wish the finale had been longer. i would’ve loved to see more of what wtgfs and basira were doing, and the actual lighting of the archives, etc. and while i completely understand why the scene at the panopticon went as quickly as it did -- it comes off very much as wild, frantic impulse in the heat of the moment where they’re in danger and trying to protect each other -- i do wish it had gone a little slower.

in my mind, the biggest issue in season 5 ended up being pacing. and this might be a personal preference thing -- there’s a lot of things within the show that i don’t personally vibe with, but i don’t necessarily think they’re badly written. but i do think season 5 was slow. and while slow things can certainly work in a certain context (season 4 comes off wildly slow til you listen to 160), i wish more of what actually happened in season 5 had been baked into the end game. the season felt like it had a lot of filler, which drives me mildly crazy, because the end game feels rushed and i don’t think it NEEDED to be. i liked a lot of what season 5 did -- there’s some impeccable episodes, the character interactions are weirdly lighter and softer than they have been in previous seasons, and i wouldn’t trade a lot of the things that it’s given us (all the jonmartin interactions, jon and georgie briefly rebuilding their friendship, martin and melanie friendship, wtgfs scenes and intimacy, backstory, lore, etc) for anything. but i do think it could’ve been structured and paced a little differently. i also think it could’ve given some more screentime to the character stuff we got from episodes like 161, 170, 186, 190, 191, 192, 199... i absolutely love both martin centric monologue episodes, but i hate that we didn’t get anything like that for jon. (or for melanie or georgie or basira...) the best episodes of the season, imo, are the ones that broke from traditional form of domain statement domain, and the ones that focused in hard on backstory, lore, character introspection, character interaction... i wish we had more of this.

when it comes to the jonmartin arc... i know this has been a point of contention with a lot of people, but i don’t hate it at all. maybe it’s just because i relistened to the majority of the season back in january, but a lot of the more grating moments that seemed large week to week (martin pressuring jon to smite people, the disagreements they had earlier in the season, jon using martin as bait in 176, etc etc) come off a lot more minor when you’re binging. personally, relistening to act i made those interactions come off as things they were struggling with through continued support and reassurance. there were absolutely things i wanted addressed, especially with the “kill bill arc” -- the disagreements early in the season, and how it seemed to turn on its head in the argument they have in 194. (i didn’t like martin blaming jon for the kill bill arc and i was hoping it would get brought up.) i also wanted to see a discussion of martin going with annabelle in 194 -- i wasn’t really ever mad at martin for doing it, but i did want to see them talk it out.

but! after relistening to 200, i think i have a better handle on why that couldn’t have happened. martin goes behind jon’s back to go with annabelle and they don’t talk about it; jon goes behind martin’s back to sabotage the plan everyone agrees on in order to prevent the fears from spreading. if they’d had a big talk about trust, and working through martin going off with annabelle, and then jon turned around and did the same thing, more or less... it would’ve completely soured that discussion. jon and martin needed to be in a place of discourse for this ending to work.

honestly, the more i’ve thought about this final JM arc, the better i feel about it. sure, jon and martin are in a bad place, and they’ve gone behind each other’s backs and been somewhat selfish, but i don’t think this ruins their relationship. for one, martin’s break in trust comes from a place of wanting to save jon and the world. and for another, jon genuinely feels he is doing the right thing, making a decision he can live with. (i have my own opinions as to how ethical jon’s decision was, but that’s another post. and i think the muddy ethics of this ending are on purpose -- it’s horror, a genre that often doesn’t offer ethical decisions.) their final decisions and final moments come from a place of love and protectiveness, and they change their decisions for the other. they still love each other, through all of it. i don’t think these late stage betrayals equivalate jonmartin necessarily being doomed as a couple (not that anyone has said that, but it’s worth saying). and i think it’s important to remember that this is still a relatively new relationship. it existed for approximately three weeks before the literal apocalypse, and it’s been under an immense amount of stress, as well as the constant fear that one or both of them would die. (which they did.) i’m not saying that excuses certain things they’ve said or done, but i am saying i don’t think the relationship is doomed. i think, if jon and martin have survived, they’ll need to work through things. they’ll need to talk it all out. and they’ll be able to! they’ll heal from this one way or another. the tragedy isn’t that jonmartin is doomed, or toxic. it’s that these moments of betrayal are what dooms them. and the beautiful undercurrent of it all is that they still manage to come together, and make decisions that mean they stay together. and that wherever they are, they’re still together.

all in all, i don’t think season 5 has been perfect, and i can make my peace with that. (tma’s worst is a hell of a lot better than most shows’ best.) (i also think it might be worth considering how covid could have affected certain aspects of how the season was written -- pandemics are stressful, and i can’t imagine what it’s like to finish an enormous, in the works for years project like this in the middle of that. personally, i’m impressed they’ve managed to finish the show through all of this and keep it to a similar quality.) i think critiques are valuable and worth discussing. and i think plot aspects aside, there are several other critique related things that could be brought up about this season that people have articulated much better than i ever could. but i also, personally, want to walk away from the show feeling satisfied. i tend to be weirdly positive about things i love (the x files finale was horrendous, but i managed to get to a place where i was happy with it, for example), and i think that applies here -- even more so because i really did love so many aspects of that finale. i don’t necessarily want to linger in my own mind over what i disliked, especially considering the show is over. although i did want to air out my thoughts.

i still love this show. i loved a lot of episodes this season, frustrations aside. season 5 will forever be my only live tma experience, and it got me through one of the worst years of my life, and i am very grateful for this. i genuinely did just want to air out my thoughts and get them all down on paper. these are just my opinions -- i don’t want to criticize anyone who feels differently about the finale, or the season as a whole. everyone’s opinion is their own.

i feel a lot, lot better about mag 200, to the point of genuinely loving it. i hope my appreciation only grows as i get further from that frenzied first day and have more time to sit with it. and i can’t wait to see all the art and read all of the amazing fics that are going to come out of this ending (and write some of my own). it’s been a wild ride. i’m glad i was here for it.

#tma #the magnus archives #mag 200 #tma spoilers #tma negative #not too strong i dont think but just in case #this might be completely incoherent lol but i wanted to get it down

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jade-marie · 3 years

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4.09 Rio/Nick Thoughts

Obviously, I'm pissed about the whole thing, surprise surprise. To me, it just feels incredibly poorly thought out for a bunch of reasons.

Makes Rio more real and easier to empathise with?

I've seen a few people say this and tbh, I disagree and I also don't think that's the aim of the game with this storyline. If they wanted people to empathise with Rio and to make him more real, they would've focused on his pain after being shot 3 times, rather than gloss right over it. They would give him POV scenes with his family, we would see him making breakfast with his child, like we did the cop this episode. This storyline is about setting Nick up as the main villain this season, so they need to make Rio his victim. Rio has been the big bad, untouchable kingpin, so by introducing someone that makes Rio look as scared as he did in the boxing ring, it sets up Nick as a bigger threat. That's why those flashbacks also did more to show us who Nick is, as a character (manipulative, charismatic, selfish, duplicitous money-hungry etc). That's why Nick is getting POV scenes in a way that Rio never really has - because this is more about Nick than it is Rio. They want you to be thinking "if he can do this to Rio, then what can he do to the girls?"

Contradicts what's already been established in canon

I could do a whole separate post on how the current dynamic with Nick literally doesn't fit in with what they showed us during s1-3 (I probably will tbh) but it doesn't even fit in with what they showed us in the flashbacks. So we've now seen Nick become physically abusive towards Rio and punish his younger brother by smacking him in the face with a stool. Based on Rio's reaction, I guess we're supposed to think this has been a common occurrence in their relationship. But there's no reason Rio would tolerate the level of power Nick has over him, let alone the physical abuse.

Rio’s been established as someone resourceful and cunning who isn't afraid to get blood on his hands - he's also a big fan of payback, so he would've more than likely found a way to get out from under Nick by now.

We've been shown that Rio has been able to handle himself, physically, from a very young age - he's a boxer. So it's not a case of Nick being able to overpower him, he literally had to have Rio restrained in order to beat him.

Nick is not much older than Rio, so it's not a case of a power imbalance being established in childhood to the point that Rio would tolerate the abuse or dominance as an adult.

Nick and Rio have never had a close bond. From a very young age, as per the flashbacks, Rio has been the one to put distance in their relationship by refusing to acknowledge Nick as his brother. He's never really liked Nick, which makes his tolerance pretty unbelievable.

Their working relationship started with betrayal, when Nick had literally no real power over Rio - he was working at a damn golf course. There's no way Rio would go into that dynamic allowing Nick to be the boss and then also accept physical punishment.

If it started in adulthood, Rio would've laid him the fuck out. Point blank.

Establishes Rio as a lifelong victim

This doesn't just feel OOC, it's so incredibly unnecessary. The crux of the entire brio dynamic was that being a criminal was a choice, they wanted to be what they are - they enjoy it. Now they're trying to re-write history to position Rio as someone who was effectively forced into this life and doesn't really have a way out, and it's just not needed at all. If anything, it takes away from his character. Him choosing to do this because he likes it, he makes a shitton of money, and he's good at it, feels like Rio. It's also what he's been trying to make Beth admit since the dawn of time - that they're in it for the same reason - that she likes it too.

But instead, they've removed that aspect of the dynamic by making Beth choose the life despite how it affects those around her because she likes it and doesn't want to stop; while Rio was forced into it by his brother, who is now being characterised as a meaner, male version of Beth. So now we're supposed to believe that the Rio we've been watching for 3.5 seasons tolerates all this shit, not just from Beth, but Nick too? Idk, it's a lot, and I really don't like it.

Yet another problematic storyline *sigh*

I really, deeply, hate that they decided to introduce Rio's family only to give him this abusive brother. Not least, because I know they won't handle the storyline properly. I also don't really see a way of this playing out where it's not really trope-y.

So presumably Nick is going to get closer to Beth in order to a) keep an eye on her/suss her out and b) get under Rio's skin, which is where the love triangle and jealous Rio come in. So then you effectively have the two MOC (brothers, no less) kinda fighting over the white woman.

Rio wants to get out from under Nick and he's probable going to use Beth to do it, enter our lovely white saviour because Rio wasn't capable of putting a bullet in this asshole's head at any point during the last 2 decades.

#one could also argue that it makes Rio’s acceptance of Beth’s behaviour look like a repeated cycle of tolerating abuse #she’s utilised physical punishment in the form of throwing keys and shooting him #he does nothing in return #yeah I hate it #beth x rio #beth boland #brio #good girls nbc #rio good girls #gg s4 #gg spoilers #nbc good girls #gg 4x09

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omniscientwreck · 3 years

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To Belong

Alright here’s some hurt/comfort as requested. Canon divergence where Caleb wasn’t able to dispel Gaudius’ hold on Essek.

One of Lucien’s many eyes looks toward him and everything slows. Warmth seeps in through his pores, sinking in through skin going straight to his head. He hears their call and for a moment he resists but, why would he?

He’s never belonged. He didn’t belong in Roshona, surrounded by religious zealots blinded by the comfort that comes with trust. Incurious, simple minded fools. He didn’t even belong with the Nein, not really. None of them trust him, he’s been eclipsed by his sins and nothing can break through to them.

He needs a blank slate, if he is to belong anywhere he has to be able to start over completely. That is what Gaudius offers, a new beginning, no judgement, no proving himself. He doesn’t have to work for their acceptance and love fills his heart. The Somnovum will take him as he is and there’s never anything he’s wanted more.

Everything is clearer now, these people were never in it for him. He drags his hands, beginning to pull at the strands of gravity as Lucien fills his mind with the power he can achieve once he’s one with them. When he joins the city.

The human lifts his hand to cast at him and without even thinking he waves his hand to counter the spell. “Essek no!” The blue tiefling looks horrified, feigning care even now.

He curls his fingers in, pooling gravity and thrusts his hands forward, centering the darkness on the wizard who’s toyed with him for nearly a year. The effect isn’t immediate but it will pay off, he’s sure and those caught inside, the humans, the clerics, the angel, the halfling will feel it’s effects soon enough.

The firbolg is the first. He hasn’t taken much damage but this seems to get to him. As Essek’s fingers clench he crumples like paper and Essek squeezes before releasing. He flies as far as he can but it isn’t far enough. More will come.

Up next, he feels the thief resisting, she’s strong and muscles through but it’s not pretty. Her form stretches briefly as he pulls and stretches with two hands before snapping back into place and he’s sure she cries for the wizard who cannot hear or see her. Something twinges in the back of his mind but Lucien calls out again and he remembers the family waiting for him.

The monk tries to appeal to him through her newfound abilities, she seems to be able to see through the darkness. She tries her hardest to reach some part of him still foolish enough to turn away from happiness and towards them, he hardly listens. She moves to run out of his grasp but just before she can make it he grabs hold and twists. Her body contorts and he can almost feel her crumble away, but she gains control and she just barely breaks out of his grasp.

He feels Caleb try to resist but his efforts just aren’t enough. He looks Essek directly in the eyes, and he hears whispers of the wizard’s voice try to get through to him, “You must break free, we need more time”. Essek’s face stretches into a wicked grin at this obvious manipulation tactic (I will show you belonging the way he couldn’t bear to) as he twists his wrist and pulls down, compressing the body in front of him. The wizard nearly leaves his influence but he’ll have another chance to take him down.

The angel didn’t stand a chance. She can’t resist the pull of his gravity and even if she could scream the monk’s name she wouldn’t be able to see her or save her. As he finishes with her his mind drifts back to memory, spurred by the wizard’s sweet words. We need more time. It will take time. You were not born with venom in your veins. Something snaps in the back of his mind and the Nonagon’s whispers turn to acid in his mind. He can see properly, he drops the spell and turns to Lucien, screaming as he turns on the beast with nine eyes, unleashing a torrent of inky black lightning, hitting him square in the chest.

-------

The battle is over and by some strange grace they’re all alive. The Nein are both celebrating and consoling each other. In the end they appealed to Molly and, for the second time, he was his own undoing.

It feels like intruding to be there, he who has done another irrevocable deed. He would leave immediately if he still had the energy but that effort is insurmountable. Caduceus had gotten them back to their own plane and they’re resting in an open field, surrounded by Caleb’s alarm spell, taking turns at watch. None of them are quite ready to be around their loved ones quite yet, needing one more night together as a family before dealing with the gravity of what they’ve accomplished.

Fjord holds Jester, keeping an eye on the horizon and whispering comfort as she silently cries into his shoulder. Beau and Yasha are curled together trying to sleep, Caleb has Frumpkin around his shoulders and Veth is curled into his side, Caduceus’ legs overlapping with Fjord’s in the tight space. There’s hardly room for Essek to sit in this small circle of sombre camaraderie, and the emotions of his travelling companions are simply too much for him so he stands to put some distance between them. Just for a moment. Just so he doesn’t have to look them in the eyes.

He stands, knees cracking and makes his way out to he open field. Nobody seems disturbed, none of them react and nobody calls after him. In the night air he’s met with stars and silence, the night sky used to comfort him. Now it’s a void he could be swallowed in and with the way he feels right now, he wishes it would.

His hair is coated with somebody’s blood, his body is battered and bruised and his spirit is shattered. They’d taken him along to help, they’d allowed him such an important opportunity to redeem himself and he’d nearly killed them. He’d made it far easier for Lucien to knock them down, luckily Caduceus and Jester had been focused and able to heal quickly enough. He’d ended up being a burden and once again a traitor.

“Essek.” He hears his name, a warning so he isn’t startled. Caleb’s voice drifts on the breeze, “Are you alright?”

He sighs, letting his head fall and squeezing his eyes shut. “No.”

“Let’s sit.”

He obliges, silent, waiting for Caleb to set the tone.

“You need to know we do not blame you for what happened. Yasha turned too, these things are not our fault.”

He can’t bare to look over but he does anyway. Caleb’s eyes shine with worry, furrowed brow pulling creases into his forehead. “It could have turned out so badly Caleb. That magic, it’s made to kill. You are all very lucky for your ability to escape and my comparative lack of experience in battle. I could have turned you to dust.”

Caleb sighs, “Guilt over hypotheticals is a waste of your time and energy. You could have, but you didn’t. We’re all still here, and we wouldn’t be without you. Don’t let yourself fall into the trap of comfortable self-loathing, you’ll waste years.”

“You couldn’t understand Caleb, I was convinced. I didn’t even want to resist. It was only-” he pauses on the brink of the confession and decides to throw caution to the wind, “It was only you that brought me back. My mind wasn’t my own, I was imprisoned and lied to and I was stupid enough to believe it.”

“I understand more than you know.” He looks instantly older, Essek has frequently wondered what Trent had done to Caleb to take such a bright and excellent man with so much kindness in his heart, and turn him hard. “I have been deceived, lied to, it lead to my worst moments. I’ve told you we are not so different and it’s clearer now more than ever. If there is redemption for me, as I’ve been assured many times there will be, you will find yours.”

Essek shakes his head, “It would have been nobler for me to die for the world than to continue this pathetic existence. It would have been a just end, poetic and balanced. Now there’s so much unresolved I don’t know where to start or where to go.”

Caleb’s hand covers his on the grass, “Well, we can start by researching, it’s what we do best. Everyone else has someone to go to, family to see, something to go back to. I only have forward momentum, more to learn and see. You could join me, we can go back to Aeor and see what comes.”

Essek nods, “I do not deserve that but because I am a selfish creature I accept your offer.”

Caleb squeezes his hand and he looks up again, into his eyes, “It does not matter what you think you deserve. You are not the decider of what I offer you.” He has a fierce look about him, he may have hit a nerve, “Trust that I know what I want and when I say I want you with me it’s not out of pity or some savior complex. Let me offer you this and quell any self-pity or doubt. I’m not obligated to like you or want to be around you, but I do because I like you Essek. I think it should be plain by now that I like you a great deal and I hope that you will come along with me, to see where this leads us.”

Despite himself, Essek turns his hand over under Caleb’s and tentatively laces their fingers together. He’s seen him do similar things with the Nein and when Caleb doesn’t flinch he relaxes a bit. “I will trust you in this. I am also quite fond of you. Thank-you, for your words. For your trust. One day I hope to feel worthy of such a gift.”

Caleb squeezes his hand and leads him back to the tent where they sit side by side wordlessly before falling asleep, still holding hands.

#critfic #essek thelyss #caleb widogast #shadowgast #critical role #cr spoilers #critical role spoilers #Gaudius' power is so insidious and i LOVE #hope this isn't too ooc #i had a hurt/comfort request and I also didn't want to write character death rn #but wow am i emotional about this ep jeeeeeze #omniwrites

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kevyfanfics · 4 years

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Touch Deprivation: When in Doubt, Hug it Out

Trying this out!! Seen a lot of “tumblr fics” out there so I thought I’d see how if goes :) This is part of my “Irondad Ending in Platonic Cuddles” one shot series!

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Peter sits on the edge of the sixteen story building, feet dangling towards the street below as cars inch their way through the lunchtime traffic. Golden beams of the midday sun reflect in his lenses, but he doesn’t feel their warmth. It’s not the same. He sighs and a cloud of steam floats through the crisp, winter air.

“May has texted you that she won’t be able to make it home tonight for dinner,” Karen softly relays the message. “Her shift has been extended.” Peter closes his eyes and focuses on the chilled breeze.

“I know.” For once, his voice is ladened with defeat and acceptance. This has been the usual for the past few months. May has to work extra shifts to keep up with the ever-increasing bills, he has school and Spider-Man, mix those two together and they’ve seen each other for a total of four hours in the past week. He’s been counting. He knows keeping track isn't a good sign, but what else is there to do?

“Peter?” Karen’s voice reaches him through the deep thoughts. Peter opens his eyes and hums a response.

“Hm?”

“Are you alright?” He considers the question. Ned and MJ have been asking him that a lot lately, but he hasn’t quite found a good way to answer it. He just…doesn’t know how he feels. He’s not sure he does feel. He just kind of exists.

“I miss…people,” he settles on. It doesn’t feel right, but it doesn’t feel wrong, either. Feelings are difficult and he doesn’t have the energy to decipher them. Instead, he pulls his knees to his chest and wraps his arms around them. The pressure against his chest feels nice. Comforting, even.

“You saw MJ and Ned today,” Karen gently reminds, trying to coax more out of him without pushing it. Peter takes in another deep breath before shrugging.

“I miss May,” he finds he’s able to clarify. He loves his friends, but coming home to an empty house for two months straight is different. If it weren’t for patrols and workshop days, he’d go stir crazy over the break.

“You had dinner with her last night,” Karen attempts, her voice sweeter than usual. “That was nice.” Peter continues to stare at the pedestrians as they cross the street in hordes.

“The only reason we ate together was because we both got home at 2am and had leftover Chinese takeout,” he counters without much thought. Even to his own ears his voice is monotonous. He feels like he lost a part of himself, but it makes him feel selfish. May’s working hard to make sure they can get by and he’s a bit lonely.

Either way, last night was a rough patrol and he ended up unceremoniously climbing through the window at 2:13am all battered and bruised. That’s all he’s gotten recently. Nothing but punches to the face, kicks to the stomach, bruises to the ribs, blood coating his hands. Nothing but violence. He hasn’t had a single, positive touch in two months. No hugs, no loving hand rubbing his back, no lingering touch in his hair, no gentle thumb smoothing over his palm. Nothing but violence violence viole-

“Peter, your alarm is going off.” Karen’s voice pulls him back once more, and it takes him a moment to process what she just said.

“Hm?” He blinks sluggishly, then unfurls his warm legs from his chest, already missing the pressure.

“It’s time to head to the workshop,” Karen patiently provides, an absolute saint as usual. Oh, Peter thinks, it’s already four. It doesn’t feel like 4pm, but he can’t exactly argue with time and space. Rolling out his stiff, aching shoulders, he lazily flings out a web and starts swinging to the Tower. He just goes through the motions: thwip, double tap to release, thwip, double tap to release.

And, in what feels like the blink of any eye, he’s there. His muscles are taut and trembling from the frigid air, but when he slips inside one of the countless windows, the warmth from the Tower at least helps minutely. As soon as he’s clear, he pulls off the mask and breathes in fresh, spandex-free air. His teeth chatter and he warms his arms up with his hands, but besides that he’s no worse for wear.

“Hey, Fri? Where’s Mr. stark?” he asks through chattering teeth hidden behind blue-tinted lips.

“He's down in the shop. I’ve alerted him to your arrival,” F.R.I.D.A.Y. promptly replies and he nods a quick thanks. First, he goes to his room to change into normal clothes, then catches a ride down the elevator. His lips are more of a peach color again, but his teeth still clack against each other as his body tries to generate some warmth. Stupid spiders with their no thermoregulation. The elevator comes to a halt and he walks into the music-ridden, always-bustling workshop.

“Hey, Mr. Stark!” he shouts over both the welder and the guitar solo. Tony’s head pops up and the music lowers at the wave of his hand.

“Hey, kid,” he greets, lifting his goggles with a smile. “How’s your bumps and bruises.” Peter shrugs, hardly remembering the superficial injuries from last night’s fight, before sitting on the nearby stool.

“Don’t really feel them anymore,” he answers honestly as he rubs his hands together. Feeling is hard these days. Tony raises a curious eyebrow, then sets down his tools and saunters over to the teen.

“And is that because of the super spidey healing or the ice cubes you call fingers?” he inquires casually. Peter glances up and tries to put on his best I’m-really-not-in-the-mood-for-this face. Nonetheless, Tony chuckles at the expression. “Alright, alright, just get warm at least.”

“I’m trying.” Peter looks back down as he responds, but then an unexpected touch has him freezing in place, muscles tense.

“Jeez, bud, you’re frozen,” Tony mutters aloud as he rubs Peter’s hands in his own to provide more warmth. It takes more than a few seconds for Peter to register what's happening. But when he does, he slowly looks up at Tony as the man continues to warm the cold hands in his own. For some reason, it makes Peter want to cry. The hands are gentle, carefully moving back and forth and all he can focus on is that it doesn’t hurt. After months of nothing but agony and breaks and blood, there’s finally something full of love and support.

He closes his eyes and his eyebrows pull together…and he starts to cry. He doesn’t mean to, but the tears slip out in a mix of relief and pent-up devastation. His toes curl under in an attempt to regain control, but it’s already too late.

“Peter? What’s wrong? Are you hurt?” Tony suddenly questions when he sees the tears and Peter’s distraught expression. All Peter can manage is the shake of his head, causing tears to fall from his chin and onto his jeans. He should’ve been more prepared, but he wasn’t expecting the concerned tone or the protective hands encasing his. He didn’t realize he was touch deprived until Tony held his hands, the first positive touch he’s had in two months. Two months. “I need you to talk to me so I can help,” Tony tries to get through to him, kneeling at his level.

“I- I don’t-“ is as far as Peter gets before a sob cuts him off. He wants to curl up in a ball and never face the outside world again. It’s like his armor has cracked and the cruel reality of just how brutal and heartless the world can be is flooding in. It’s breached completely when one of Tony’s hands leaves his and cups his cheek.

He doesn’t hold back the sobs after that.

He simply cries, leaning into the soft touch and grabbing his mentor’s wrist like a lifeline. The thought of losing the contact now is unbearable. He can’t. He just can’t. At the action, Tony seems to catch on. This time, he pulls Peter into his chest and holds the kid tightly in his arms.

“You’re okay,” he assures into Peter’s curls, “I got you.” Peter feels them begin to rock and a hand rubs its way up and down his back in a comforting, predictable motion. He pulls in shuddering, uneven breaths, but his body isn’t ready to calm down. Instead, he grips Tony’s sleeves and buries his head in his chest so that his sobs are muffled by fabric. All the built up emotions force their way out, but being hugged is all he needs. Warm, strong arms keeping him safe. His cries rip Tony apart at the seams and he wonders how he could’ve missed this. It’s a basic human need to have positive, physical affirmation, something Peter evidently hasn’t had for a while.

The hug eases the aching in Peter’s chest and he holds on tighter. He can’t lose this feeling again. After all these weeks of apathy and going through the motions, he’s finally able to feel everything.

“I can't- there’s no-“ Tony gently hushes him, afraid that the teen will work himself into a panic attack if this keeps up. Honestly, it’s the last thing on Peter’s mind. He just knows he doesn’t want to be let go.

“Deep breaths, kiddo,” Tony patiently encourages. Peter can feel him shift and he registers that they somehow made it to the floor while he was focused on gripping the fabric closer. Breathing, Peter recalls, breathing is important. Gotta breathe. Just have to- He takes a deep, shaking breath, but the exhale becomes a sob and he just can’t pull himself together and he hates it and he just wants to be in control again- “I’m so proud of you.” He starts at the quiet, genuine admission. “I’m unbelievably proud of you,” Tony continues. “You don’t have to be so strong all the time. Sometimes strength is asking for help when it’s tough.” Peter’s chin wobbles and fresh tears glide down his cheeks. He nods into Tony’s shoulder, and pulls his legs to his chest for extra comfort.

“It’s, it’s been tough for a while,” he divulges in a hoarse whisper.

“I know, kid,” Tony acknowledges, lightly combing his fingers through Peter’s hair.

“I didn’t,” the teen confesses in a whisper. He really hadn’t seen any of this coming. “I thought I was okay. I, I thought I was fine just doing what I,” he swallows, “what I was doing. I didn’t think it affected me this much. It was just…I didn’t feel anything.” Apathy was probably a more apt description, but it was true. He hadn’t felt any intense emotion in such a long period of time that Tony’s loving, concerned action sent him into overdrive. Tony lets out a deep breath and rests his chin atop Peter’s head, tucking the kid into him to provide as much comfort as possible.

“From a scientific standpoint, lack of human contact decreases cortisol levels and NK cells,” Tony points out. It might seem like a cold and calculating response, but he knows what he’s doing; he’s putting it into perspective for Peter. He’s showing the kid that it isn’t just all in his head. It’s a physical change to a lack of touch. Peter let’s out a breathless chuckle, his wound up muscles starting to relax into the hug.

“A, uh, a hug needs to last at least twenty seconds for dopamine and serotonin to be released. Happy brain chemicals,” he adds with a sniff, closing his eyes. He just needs a moment to take it all in. It’s rare for Tony to be the one to illicit physical contact, so he accepts it while can.

“Well then,” Tony softly starts, “guess we gotta wait til you have enough happy brain chemicals.” He situates them more comfortably on the floor, then tightens his hold. Another trembling breath escapes Peter, emotions still raw and superficial, but manageable. It's a start, and if that start just so happens to be in Tony’s arms, maybe it’s not such a bad one.

#peter parker #peter parker angst #tony stark #irondad #spiderson #fanfiction #fanfic #MCU #Avengers #writing #Iron Man #spider-man

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queeenpersephone · 4 years

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14. A kiss so desperate that the two wind around each other, refusing to let go until they are finished. Ironwidow, please?

so this kiss is a different kind of desperation than you might’ve been thinking of but trust me, it’s desperate lol. (also the ‘keep going’ line is stolen from the x files!)

anyway, here you go anon!

timeline: post endgame. tony and nat are alive. very very slight wandavision spoilers. just in terms of how wanda gets vision back.

Natasha unlocks the door to her room, shoulders relaxing only slightly at the familiar darkness of an outdated motel, though its emptiness is unfamiliar. For the past three months, she has been on the run, but that isn’t the unusual part. No, the unusual part is that she is not on the run alone. Three months ago, mere weeks after they put Thanos down for good, Wanda had asked her to go for a drive. They had left in silence; there hadn’t been anyone to tell. The Compound had been quiet since the final battle, everyone’s minds on the sacrifices that had been made. Peter Quill, who none of them knew very well, had sacrificed himself to kill Thanos, bringing an end that was years overdue.

But no Avenger’s mind spent much time on Quill. Not when Clint had vaulted over a cliff to earn the Soul Stone.

The months are especially bad for Tony and Natasha. Natasha, of course, is flooded with guilt whenever she thinks of Clint’s family, of the way he had begged her to let him go. He saved her from the KGB all those years ago, watched her back for decades. Now, he has saved her once again, at the expense of his own life.

Tony’s guilt is different. As much as he loves Clint, who has been a brother-in-arms to him, Natasha’s presence is such a relief that he can’t help but be grateful that Clint is the faster runner. And the worst part of it is: Natasha knows that. Every time Natasha looks into his eyes, she sees that relief, and it’s unbearable. He can’t bear to say anything to her directly, terrified of making things worse than they already are. They haven’t slept in the same bed since the battle, but at least they are under the same roof. At least she still wears her wedding ring.

Tony wakes up every morning, scared to death that he will find that ring on his bedside table and Natasha herself, gone.

Natasha knows all this too.

Which is why, when Wanda explains that she wants to find Vision’s body and give him the burial he deserves, Natasha takes the selfish opportunity to dive back into the spy world as they attempt to work out which of the shady government agencies is holding him.

This evening, they’ve made a break - an agency called SWORD had one scientist whose sister had been saved in 2012 by the Hulk. When they had contacted him, he had told them where Vision’s body is being stored. Tomorrow, they are going to get him back.

In celebration, Natasha gets them separate motel rooms. After checking on Wanda, who is deep into an old Sabrina the Teenage Witch program, she retreats to her own room.

The darkness feels a little oppressive, searching, even though she’s already checked high and low for listening devices or cameras. Still, Natasha keeps her gun tucked into her waistband as she moves to undress, her fingers finding the hem of her shirt and lifting it.

“Keep going, Agent Romanoff.”

Natasha recognizes that voice, she knows that voice, sultry and dark and oh, she knows he’s angry too, but her reflex to turn a gun on him is natural and swift. Sure enough, over the barrel, she sees Tony Stark, sunk deeply into the armchair in the corner of the room. He must’ve come in when she went to check on Wanda. “What are you doing here?” She asks, eyes narrowed. She puts down her gun, tucking it back into her jeans.

“What am I doing here? What the hell are you doing here? Nat, what is this?” He demands, standing. There is a fire burning in his gaze.

Natasha refuses to take a step back. He has another thing coming if he thinks she’s not going to stand her ground. “Wanda and I are tracking something down. It doesn’t concern you.”

He scoffs. “Would that something be Vision?” Her silence speaks for itself. “Wanda is my teammate, my friend. Vision was my creation, also my friend.” The air between them crackles with tension as he takes a step toward her, hands clearly clenching in his pockets. “And you, Natasha. You are my wife. Remember that? You vowed to love me, to stay by my side, to trust me.” She blinks slowly; the desperation on his face is painfully obvious, and she just wants a mere second or two of darkness. “But you can barely look at me,” he calls her out, eyes narrowed.

Part of her wants to hurt him. Part of her wants to be honest. She knows how to accomplish both. “Clint is dead,” she retorts, her voice breaking on the last word. Tony and Clint are the only people she has ever broken down in front of, but never completely. Never like the way she wants to now. “He’s dead, and I’m back, and you’re glad, Tony. You’re happy.”

Tony shakes his head, removing his hands from his pockets and holding them out to her ever so slightly. Still, she does not move closer. “You think I’m happy Clint isn’t with us?” He asks, swallowing hard. “I wish he was here every day. But you’re the most important thing in this universe to me. It’s you I can’t live without. ” He sighs, searching her face for some indication that he’s saying the right thing. “If I could make it different, if we could change it… if I could throw myself off that cliff to make you happy, I would do it.”

Those words suck up all the oxygen from the room. Neither of them breathe at the brutality of his honesty; Tony himself goes pale. Natasha looks horrified, eyes glistening. “That’s not what I want.” She can hardly get the words out fast enough. “Don’t put those words in my mouth.”

He is close to tears himself. “Then what do you want?” He demands, voice cracking. “Tell me, and if it’s in my power, I’ll give it to you.”

She stops. Thinks. What she wants is Clint back. She wants Thor and Steve and Bruce and the others to have no more nightmares, to find happiness, to find peace. She wants to bury Vision’s body for Wanda, who has suffered immense loss. She wants to live in another time, another universe, where she is never a spy and Tony never the Merchant of Death, where someone else saves the world because their only responsibility is to each other.

But none of that is possible. None of that would close the distance between her husband and her in this moment, which is what she wants more than anything else.

Oh.

“Will you hold me?” She whispers, and the fire in Tony’s eyes fades into something else, something achingly tender.

“Of course,” he murmurs, striding forward and pulling her into his body.

Without heels, she fits comfortably under his chin, and they press together at every point. The angry words between them are still there, but they are softened by the embrace. But this isn’t enough. Natasha pulls back, ignoring his grunt of displeasure, before circling her hands behind his neck and pulling his mouth to hers.

It’s soft, gentle for a mere moment. But they’ve been apart for too long, and in seconds his tongue is in her mouth and her leg is hitched around his hip as she guides them so he presses her against the wall. It’s wet and hard and she thinks she might be crying, that he might be crying, but she focuses on the way his hands feel on her thigh and her neck. Hot. Stifling. Like he’s going to leave bruises, but the marks are tangential to the way he wants to dig his way inside of her and never come out. She knows, because she feels it too.

Her nails scrape at the nape of his neck, her other hand cupping his cheek and guiding his movement. His hand moves to her ass, and he hitches her up, kissing her all the while. She knows he loves it when her legs are wrapped around him, always ready with a joke about how quickly she could squeeze the life out of him if she wanted. Things that would intimidate most intimate partners excite her husband; it’s just one of the many things she loves about him.

“I love you,” he murmurs against her mouth, licking his way back inside before she can respond.

He moves to the bed, sitting back with her on his lap. The movement separates their faces for a moment, and she hurries to say: “I shouldn’t have left.”

He looks up at her. “No,” he says, dark eyes both solemn and gentle, pulling her back down so he can whisper the rest against her mouth. The separation of a few inches is too much after everything. He could die happy if she were pressed up against him for the rest of his days. “But we’ve been separated by so much, Nat. Circumstances, time, ourselves. And we always come back together.” He lays back, bringing her with him. She kisses him then, gentle and chaste and so wrapped around him that there is no air or light or dark between them.

“I love you,” she murmurs. “I’m sorry.”

He runs his fingers through her hair, bringing her forehead to his. “I’m sorry,” he replies. “I’ve avoided talking about Clint because I thought it would hurt you more. But I was wrong.” He pauses. “Can we just…?”

She smiles. “We can,” she tells him, moving so that she’s tucked into his side, still twined together. They exchange soft kisses in the darkness.

Tomorrow, they will help Wanda find peace.

Tonight, they will find peace in each other.

#ironwidow #tonynat #my writing #marvel writing #marvel #tony x natasha

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petri808 · 3 years

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We’ll Take Back Heaven a Nalu Yakuza Au

1 | 2

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The moment Lucy left the room, Natsu simply turned and gave a silent look to his lieutenant Gray who nodded back in acknowledgment and left with one of the men. He sat back in his chair, fingers steepled below his chin in thought. Could it really be one of his own men? Some of the lower level guys didn’t always follow the rules, but it was rare for them to utterly disregard them! Oh! That really pissed him off, because they knew better then to test Natsu’s patience. There’s a damn good reason he was able to create such a lucrative gang in the heart of Tokyo when so many others would kill for it. By the age of 21, his father retired and left the position of Oyabun leader to Natsu. But, Natsu wasn’t satisfied with the old way of doing things. This was the 21st century and times must change.

It was well known that the Yakuza traversed a dangerous underworld full of illegalities. Drugs, prostitution, gambling, shake downs and extortion, theft, or in other words the seedier side of society. So that is where Natsu focused his attention. Some of the very first of the changes were to reign in unauthorized violence or any crimes that utilized it. Such a move sent a utter shockwave through the order and those that refused to let go of the old ways were swiftly eliminated to instill an image of power and fear that Natsu Dragneel was not to be messed with. His logic behind the move was simple. Do not do anything that brings attention to the gang and attacking someone on the street for a few yen is a quick way for the authorities to show up. So, in a way, Natsu was lucky it happened to be one of Lucy’s employees and not a random person, because they would have immediately called the police. Though it also brought up another question. Were there other crimes he just hadn’t heard of yet?

“Well, she’s still as feisty as ever, gihi.” Gajeel broke the silence of the room when he returned. “Could’ve cut the sexual tension with a sword.”

Natsu crossed his arms in feigned annoyance. If it were any other underling, they would have received a harsher response, but Gajeel was one of his oldest and trusted friends. “Pfft. I don’t know what you’re talking about. She’s a rival, that’s it. You know that.”

“Mmhmm.” Gajeel snickered. “So, now what?”

“Gray started working on finding who it was. I want you to call your contacts at police and see if they’ve had any reports of recent robberies in the area, and if there were, any details we can use to figure out who it might be.”

“Can do boss. Anything else?”

“You think it could one of our own?”

Gajeel looked up for a couple of minutes as if he were running their personnel through his mind. Finally, he rubbed his chin. “There’s a couple of newbies, a bit young and dumb that might be stupid enough to break the rules. I’ll call my contacts first before helping Gray press the men for info. Someone’s gotta know something.”

“Good. You do that and let me know as soon as you get a lead. I want this dealt with as quickly as possible.”

“Gotcha.”

Between Natsu’s two lieutenants and their best men, they interviewed all of the most likely suspects. Gajeel’s police informant let him know that there were a couple other robberies that sounded similar a few blocks away from where Lucy’s employee and client had been accosted. He also learned those two victims gave a similar description of the robber. With the new information, along with other snitches, they narrowed it down within a few days to a low-level street guy in the organization. But unlike Gajeel’s initial hunch, it wasn’t one of the newbies. Instead, the male had been with them for a couple of years now and never caused any problems. In fact, the guy fashioned himself as a smooth talking ladies’ man who supposedly disliked violence. So, it was a bit surprising it was one of the ones they’d least expected.

Gajeel and his men found the man named Bora Prominence laying low at his girlfriend’s apartment after he’d heard the gang was looking for him. Not the smartest move. The woman gave him up without a fight, fearing the Yakuza more than her boyfriend. So, once she’d let them inside, they quickly found Bora hiding in the bathroom and dragged him out.

“It wasn’t me!” Bora screamed as the men beat him to the floor. “You got no proof I did shit!”

Gajeel planted his foot into the small of the man’s back and held him down. “Two of the witnesses saw the tattoo on your face. That’s enough evidence for us.” He growled. “You knew the code and what would happen if you broke it, so stop being a bitch.”

But Bora continued to resist the four men, pushing off the floor with his arms unsuccessfully against Gajeel’s massive weight or fending off kicks from the others. They pummeled him with fists and kicks over and over until one clear blow finally knocked him unconscious long enough to be tied up. Despite a heavy beating bad enough to leave him bruised and bloodied, he continued to scream about his innocence. Back at headquarters, they dragged him into Natsu’s office with hands bound behind his back and forced him onto his knees.

The room held Natsu sitting at his desk, along with both lieutenants, four of their men keeping Bora restrained, and lastly Lucy with the victim to Natsu’s right side. He had contacted her as soon as he knew the suspect was being brought in. And thought they were pretty certain of guilt, the woman’s immediate reaction when they’d brought Bora in of cringing back and moving closer to her boss spoke volumes.

“Is that him?” Natsu questioned to gain a verbal confirmation.

“Y-Yeah,” the woman squeaked out. “He’s the one who pushed me down and robbed us.”

Natsu’s eyes stayed narrowed and glaring at Bora as he addressed the women. “Thank you, that’ll be all. Heartfilia you both can leave now I’ll handle things from here.”

“You’re a doll,” Lucy giggled and gave Natsu a quick teasing peck on the cheek before ushering her employee away. They’d done what they needed to do, now it was his job to finish it.

“Tch, so that’s what this is all about.” Bora sneered, spitting out a clot of blood. “Cause that bitch got you all worked up over a measly few bucks?”

“Watch it!” Natsu roared. “It ain’t a good idea to piss me off anymore then I already am!” There was a fire burning behind Natsu’s stare because when he looked at this man Bora, he doesn’t see the crimes themselves, but the disobedient threat he posed to their organization. How dare this selfish ignorant punk threaten everything they’ve worked hard to build! And to accuse him of weakness in doing Lucy’s bidding just sealed the man’s fate.

Bora snapped back defiantly, though the crack in his tone gave away the fear brewing beneath. “What does it matter, I know what awaits me.”

“You’re right.” Natsu relaxed back into his chair once he sensed the man’s inevitable compliance. “You knew the consequences for crossing me. What does it matter if my rival is also benefiting in this way? Because I know there are other victims. Dumbass, how do you think we linked you to all this? Those other victims reported it to the police! Which is exactly why I have the rules I have in place! You put all of us in jeopardy by pulling this kind of stupid low level bullshit!”

“Pfft, you act like we’re saints. If the cops really wanted to, they’d look into the other illegal shit we do regardless.”

“No, it’s you who fails to recognize there is a hierarchy to the kinds of crimes that bring heat on us. Drugs? Prostitution? The cops don’t care as much, but assault? Robbing people, murders, now those are things they will pay attention to, and I will not tolerate it!” Natsu sat forward with a malevolent grin. “Welcome to the modern Yakuza.”

Drugs and prostitution were a part of the gangs dealings, but the bigger scheme was in shaking down the local business owners for protection money. Thing is, Natsu’s gang actually did the protection part causing crimes in that area for customers or businesses to drop down to nearly zero. So, while the business owners weren’t thrilled to cut a portion of their profits, they also appreciated not having to worry about security. That and because of the gangs connections, they had pipelines of cheaper priced products which helped to keep their costs down. This more symbiotic relationship is why they didn’t go to the authorities and why the gang could hold such a control over the area. Making sure the areas streets were protected from violent crime is a testament to the gangs power and would insure that these businesses stayed compliant.

“Tch.” Bora retorted. “You’re just young and dumb. Eventually you’ll realize there’s a reason why things were done a certain way in the old days.”

“Maybe, maybe not, but your days of worrying about it are over.” Natsu motioned to Gajeel. “I’m done. Get him out of my face.”

Gajeel then motioned to his men to haul Bora to his feet and drag him away to an unknown destination never to be seen from again. Cliche as it may sound, even in killing off a problem like Bora, Natsu’s gang didn’t follow tradition. Bora would be held as a prisoner until his wounds healed then his death made to look like just another suicide statistic. In the seven years that Natsu has reigned, not one murder had been laid at their doorstep and he intended to keep it that way.

Now that the Bora business was over, Natsu closed his eyes and fully relaxed into his chair with a sigh. He didn’t exactly enjoy playing the tough guy bit and only did it out of necessity. This was a life his father groomed him for since birth, but he’d love nothing more than to just settle down with a wife and start a family of his own. Not that he couldn’t already do so, but that required finding the right woman to settle down with and no one other than his old flame has ever evoked I’m him more than a passing glance.

He didn’t know how long he’d been relaxing when there was a knock on his office door. “Yeah? Come in.”

“Sorry to disturb you,” the man spoke as he quietly entered the room. Invel Yura was Natsu’s Saiko-kamon, the top advisor and managed the administrative side of the organization. “I wanted to go over your schedule for tomorrow in case I need to make any changes.”

“It’s fine.” Natsu gestured to the chair fronting the desk. Invel had been the advisor to his father for the last few years of his tenure and he fully trusted the man’s diligence.

Invel sat down and opened up a calendar. “Tomorrow morning, we have a new shipment of prescription drugs coming in as well as some ecstasy, so you’ll need to appoint someone to oversee inventory processing.”

“Hmm, who should I have work on this?” Natsu asked for Invel’s opinion.

“Might I suggest Rajeel Ramal? He’s gruff but meticulous and has done a good job so far.”

“Is that so? Then that’s fine, let him continue. What’s next?”

“Okay,” Invel scribbled the orders in his book. “Next, the only other thing you have is a party to attend with one of our high end clients.”

“Which one?”

“The son of Yuuji Katsunuma of Katsunuma industries.”

“Ah yes, the one we supply with cocaine. Such a spoiled brat, but he spends a lot with us.”

Invel chuckled. “That’s the one. It starts at 8pm.”

“Okay. Thank you, Invel. Is that all for now?”

“Yes. If anything, else comes up I will let you know.”

“I’m sure you will. Oh. Have an appropriate suit pressed and ready for me for the occasion.”

“Very well, sir. Is there anything else you need from me?”

“No. You may go.”

Invel nodded and returned to his own office. He made a few typical phone calls such as to Natsu’s house staff regarding an evening outfit and the transporters bringing the morning inventory to make sure everything was on schedule. Aside from the Bora issue, the going’s-on of business continued as normal. The final call he placed before he’d leave for lunch was to Rajeel of a simple a five word instruction. Nothing more needed to be said, knowing that his associate would understand. Invel sat back in his chair with a smile. “It’s almost too easy…”

#nalu #nalu au #modern setting #Natsu dragneel #Lucy heartfilia #nalu fan fiction #yakuza au #nalu fan fic #natsu x lucy #fairytail #we'll take back heaven #ch 2 #petri808

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cakejots · 3 years

Text

this is us trying, Chapter 1 - The Beginning of an End

In this AU, they don’t know each other outside of the suit. And in this AU, Ladybug and Chat Noir love each other. But in this AU, Chat doesn’t want their identities revealed.

Written for @ladynoirjuly 2021

notes: this is a coherent story based on all the prompts; each chapter contains at least 3 prompts

Ch 1 | Ch 2 | Ch 3 | Ch 4 | Ch 5 | Ch 6 | Ch 7 | Ch 8 | Ch 9 | Ch 10

Read on AO3

1. Older

“Well, Chaton?”

Chat stared at Ladybug as though she had grown an extra head.

“My lady, are you sure you want to know?”

“Oh come on Chat, there are at least tens of thousands of people who are of the same age. There’s no way you can figure out who I am just from that.” She leaned forward, chin on her palms and eyes sparkled with anticipation.

“Hmm, that is true.” His fingers under his chin, eyes searching the sky. “I'm turning 21 this year.”

Ladybug looked dazed for a moment before smugness took over. “So I was right about your age! Well, the age range at least.”

“Oh? And how did my lady manage to guess it?”

Ladybug slowly ran her eyes down his body before peering right back into his eyes, and she smiled innocently.

Chat barked out a laugh.

“Now guess mine!”

“Don’t need to. I know you’re in the same age range as meow.”

She raised an eyebrow and his lips curled slyly. “The same way you managed to guess my age. Do you really want me to say it? Or in this case, show it to you?”

Ladybug couldn’t help but blush. “Okay, okay. You’re not wrong, I’m turning 21 this year too.”

Chat’s child-like demeanour came back, eyes lighting up. “Okay, but now I have to know who’s actually older! Mine’s in September.”

“I'm Leo, so the range is from July to August,” she grinned.

Chat regarded her with a mixture of awe and shock. “No way… You’re actually older than me!”

“Why is this a shock to you? I am more mature than you are,” Ladybug giggled.

“I mean, yeah, but for that fact to get thrust into my face, it just feels—”

“Surreal. I get it,” she sighed blissfully.

They fell into a peaceful silence as this new realisation settled within their hearts and minds. They were finding the most minute of things to share without giving away their identities, and just this tiny, basic fact about each other was overwhelming enough.

This, was something they could experience soon enough, to be normal again and enjoy the process of courting. This, was something they could slowly discover about each other soon enough, to fall in love harder, and to fall in love all over again.

“We are so close. So so close.” Chat gazed into her eyes, took her hand in his and squeezed, much like how his heart was feeling as it was overcome with emotions.

“We are finally nearing the end of all of this.” Ladybug pulled him into a tight hug.

2. Masks

It was over.

It was finally over.

It was a joyous day for Parisians as the supervillain who had been terrorising their city over the past few years had finally been caught and sent to prison.

It was a joyous day indeed.

But why was the atmosphere surrounding him so burdensome, just like the downpour that struck ever since he had entered the Agreste mansion?

The thunderstorm that raged above him, the Butterfly and Peacock Miraculouses that sat in his palm, and the face of the supervillain who was actually his father, glaring at him from a distance away with absolute despise and fury, they all seemed to be mocking him for his ill-fortune.

Of course there was no happy ending for him, even after the final battle. How could he have been so naive to believe that there was a positive outcome for him? He was the epitome of bad luck. From being chosen to be the Black Cat Miraculous holder, right down to his fate that had decided his course for him ever since he was brought into this world.

He was all alone now. His mother’s passing during his early teenage years had left an open wound in his heart. He saw the funeral happened. He cried as the ceremony went on for days on end. He was there to witness the burial of his mother. Those were definitive proof that his mother had passed. He has been mourning for his mother every year on her death anniversary.

So imagine his shock when he saw her in the basement he didn’t know existed, still as radiant and beautiful as he remembered. And to be slapped with the knowledge that his father had a hand in all of this.

He had a hand in withholding the truth about his mother’s whereabouts all this time. The truth that he had rights to. That she was well and alive but in deep deep slumber, one that she might never awake from. He had a hand in causing him so much pain, so much trauma. To be the perfect child he is to be, else he was no son of Gabriel. The direct role his father played in causing him to feel neglected, unloved, and worthless. Just so that he could play the supervillain and recruit innocent Parisians in his quest to obtain the Ladybug and Black Cat Miraculouses.

He caused Parisians so much pain, stripping them of their right to feel what they feel. A minor slipped up from being unable to control their emotions and they became the villains for the day. He had used them for his selfish desires, to do his dirty work for him. All this for not being able to move on from the death of his wife. Not being able to accept the natural cycle of life.

And all of this had happened under his nose, but he didn’t even know. He has been living with the supervillain all his life. He has interacted with the supervillain almost daily. He has shown care and concern for the supervillain. He has forgiven the supervillain for his actions, always telling himself that he had his reasons for acting the way he did. He was a superhero and he didn’t even know.

If he had known, maybe he'd be able to convince his father to stop whatever he was doing. Maybe even prevent the current outcome of events, and even save his father from serving jail time. Some superhero he is.

He didn't know what would become of his mother, but he had long accepted that she had passed. And now, his father will leave his side, to pay for what he did.

Chat was truly alone now.

“Chaton?”

He blinked and looked over to his left. His lady was standing right beside him with concerned eyes, her hands on his left arm. The rain had lightened up considerably and he could see her as clear as day. He didn’t register her touch until he had seen it himself.

Chat wordlessly turned towards her and extended his right hand, the hand that held the two missing Miraculouses. He was expecting her to take them from him and called it a day with their habitual fist bump, but she closed his right hand and held both his hands in hers tightly and peered into his eyes.

“Chaton, are you alright?”

Ladybug cursed herself for asking the obvious. Clearly, he wasn’t feeling his usual self. The cheeky and confident demeanour he always had after the end of a battle was gone. His ears, tail, and posture seemed so deflated and depressed that he just looked like a kitten kicked hard.

She touched his face.

Chat grabbed her hand on his face and wanted to smack himself. His lady was right beside him all this time as he was drowning himself in self-loathing and self-pity. He couldn't let his gloominess take hold of her on this glorious day.

“I’m fine,” Chat showcased the brightest smile he could muster at that moment.

Ladybug worried her lips, not buying it for a single second.

“Chaton…”

He knew she wasn’t going to buy his act with the way she was watching him. Chat really didn’t know what he should do. His hand squeezed hers, he closed his eyes and took a deep breath.

“Can we go for a run, just for a while? I promised we’ll talk when we meet up again at the Eiffel Tower.”

When Ladybug didn’t respond, he opened his eyes to beg. “Please?”

Ladybug squeezed his hand before nodding and letting go, giving him a head start. Chat caught her hands before they fell completely by her side, and placed the Miraculouses within her palms. He made sure she put them away securely before jumping away. She followed him soon after, giving him the time and space he needed.

When Ladybug arrived at the Eiffel Tower, Chat seemed really nervous. She really didn’t know what made him like this, but he shouldn’t be that restless. Not of the revelations he made during the final battle and his rooftop run, and he definitely should not be uneasy about her arriving.

She extended her arms towards him. “Minou, can I hug you?”

Chat rushed to her and embraced her tightly. Her hands drew soothing circles on his back to release tension from his body, and he relaxed ever so slightly into hers.

“Okay, I’m ready to talk.” He took a deep breath to mentally prepare himself before he continued. “I-I know you’re looking forward to the reveal after the final battle. I am too. We’ve waited years for this moment. But… but can we not do that now?”

Ladybug instantly pulled back and gawked at him. To say that she was shocked was an understatement. She did not expect this at all. Yes, she totally forgot about the reveal because she was so focused on making sure he’s alright, but for him to just drop the bomb on her like that. “But—”

“I know this is a really unfair request from me,” he quickly added. “But I don’t want to deceive you. We can go on dates in our suits! So that you get to know me. All of me. How I act in and out of battle.”

He slowly averted his gaze. “And that the feelings you have for me will still be there even after our dates.”

Ladybug couldn’t believe her ears, Chat is still Chat, no matter the situation. The fact that he didn’t even include her in the proposal he just suggested made it obvious that he wasn’t even convinced himself. They both knew that they weren’t going to act any different. They’ve hung out outside of Akuma attacks, they will be the same in and out of the suit. It just didn’t make sense.

“Chat...” she pleaded.

“I’m so sorry, I’m so so sorry. Please don’t leave me,” he sobbed and enveloped her in a bear hug, afraid that she'd run if he didn’t have a tight enough grasp on her.

Wait, what? No, no! Where did he get the idea that she’s going to leave?

“I-I can’t—”

That's absurd.

“Chat, you don’t have to explain.” Her hands continued the back rubs from before, making sure that it soothed him enough till he’s comfortable loosening his grip. She slowly pulled back and cupped his cheeks, a smile on her face. “Words are not needed. I may not understand the reasons behind your decisions now, but I trust that your heart is in the right place.”

That subtle shine in his eyes did not go unnoticed by Ladybug. “Words cannot express how thankful I am, my lady.”

“Well, then better make it up to me with the dates you promised.”

“Of course, my lady.”

Judging the look on his face, she slowly added, “Do you need more time to sort things out?”

“I don’t know. Can you stay with me a while longer?”

She nodded understandingly and went back to hugging him. Chat tightened his arms around her and breathed in her scent. Her fingers left delicate touches in its trail from his back to his scalp, knowing full well that it's a gesture he’d appreciate. Low rumbles of purring slowly filled the air around them.

They stayed tangled for who knows how long before Ladybug popped the question.

“About the masks, are you sure?”

“Yeah. We don’t drop them,” Chat said with a conviction he knew was never there.

3. Tease

It’s been a week since the defeat of Shadowmoth.

A week since Chat broke down from whatever he had experienced during that short time frame of the final battle.

A week since he had declined the reveal.

Ladybug wasn’t pleased, how could she be? She had waited 6 long years for that, ever since the day they first met and swore to protect Paris from Hawkmoth’s clutches. Well, Shadowmoth now.

It sucked. Even Shadowmoth has had development. Her relationship with Chat? Null.

No. It wasn’t fair to say that. Of course their relationship had developed. From practical strangers to lovers, they trusted each other with their lives, even if they didn’t know who the other was behind that mask. That’s some intense trust they have right there.

But still.

She was really looking forward to the reveal. They were really looking forward to the reveal.

Chat must have had a reason for what he chose that day, strong enough to throw away what he desired most. But what?

Ladybug sighed, she supposed the only thing she could do was to hope that nothing about their relationship had changed. And be there for him when he needs it, like a good girlfriend she is. Are they even a couple? The unnamed boundaries were causing her additional anxiety she didn’t need now. She guessed she’d have to talk it out with Chat and make clear where they stood.

She got broken out of her thoughts when she heard footsteps approaching her.

“Hey...”

Before she even turned around, the tone of his voice sounded so tired, as though coming here was a chore for him. He had shared with her before that meeting her is always the highlight of his day. For it to become a chore… He must be really affected by it.

“My lady?” He stopped behind her.

That wouldn’t do.

She whipped around and flicked his bell, “Hey Chaton, you’re here!”

And as if that wasn’t enough, she had the sweetest smile he has ever seen plastered on her beautiful face. Those rosy cheeks and welcoming lips upturned, and the whites of her teeth slightly visible from her smile, directed at him. So happy to see him. So thrilled for him to be here.

It shot right through his heart. He couldn’t do anything else besides fixate his eyes on her radiant and alluring face.

“Aww, cat got your tongue? Or in this case, a ladybug got your tongue?” She cooed and flicked his bell once more.

She was relieved she still has this effect on him.

“S-she definitely did.” A pink hue dusted his cheeks.

Cute.

Ladybug figured the only thing she could do was to remind him of all the enjoyable memories they had together and banish the sad ones that gripped him from a week ago. The reveal can wait. What's important was to make sure he doesn’t forget why they wanted the reveal in the first place.

She concluded upping her tease factor was the way to go.

“I’ll make sure you know that my feelings for you are real and you won’t be able to resist my charms any longer.”

“My lady,” Chat whined. He was already regretting his decisions from a week before.

Ladybug, on the other hand, was grinning. She’d accept whatever he’s willing to give. She supposed she could get the ball rolling, to begin filling in on fresh empty pages as they experience falling in love all over again. Because deep down, that is what they’ve wanted after all.

#ladynoirjuly2021 #ladynoirjuly #ladynoir #mesfics #miraculous ladybug #fanfic #mlb fanfic #ladybug #chat noir #alternate universe #light angst #fluff #hurt/comfort #this is us trying

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voiceless-terror · 4 years

Note

all those sleep prompts are so killer and such big jon vibes!!! i would love to read anything on "- a character who refuses to share a sleeping space with anyone else, and it’s because he doesn’t want to disturb others/doesn’t want pity/is ashamed of his nightmares" with jon. bonus points if tim is involved and extra bonus points if tim also has experience with insomnia/nightmares, either himself or used to taking care of someone in his life with those issues...

Hey there! Here I am, finally writing the promised Jon/Tim that I should have written ages ago. Feels good to be on this train! I’ve placed this in pre-canon, when Jon and Tim are researchers and have just started dating. Hope you like!

“That was...really nice, Tim. Thank you.”

“Thank you? Jon, we split the check,” Tim throws an arm around his shoulder and it’s heavy and warm in all the right ways. “You know my policy on that. The person who asks you out pays the bill! Ergo, me.”

“I know, I know,” Jon relents under the pressure and burrows into Tim’s side. The wine’s gone to his head, he’s sure of it. Shouldn’t have had those three glasses. But the waiter was so attentive and Tim’s smile was infectious so he couldn’t help but say yes, of course, thank you, to every pour. “I just...I really enjoyed myself, is all.”

“I did too,” Tim’s voice goes to that soft, fond register he’s only just started using with Jon. Before it had been all gregarious charm, winks and nudges that he used interchangeably with friends and acquaintances alike. When Tim first asked him out, Jon thought he was joking; he rolled his eyes and went back to work, ignoring Tim’s look of hurt. Jon was used to practical jokes of this nature- he’s not exactly an attractive prospective partner, and several people have implied he was more trouble than he was worth. But a week later, on their usual coffee run, Tim offered to buy him dinner, his voice serious and shy and utterly unlike him. The look in his eyes was genuine and Jon had to say yes; who could refuse him, in the face of such sincerity?

It’s been a month and they’ve fallen into a sort of routine. Every week is a new spot- Tim’s a bit of a foodie, and he overheard him making a list of places with Sasha. It took up an entire page in his notebook, and Jon wonders if Tim will get sick of him before they finish it.

He stumbles on the sidewalk and Tim catches him with a steady hand on his waist. The cold air should be bracing but it is not; his dizziness increases two times over and it’s a long journey home. Tim knows this, which must lead to his next suggestion.

“You can spend the night at mine,” he says, voice purposefully light. Jon freezes. They hadn’t broached the topic yet, but he thinks Tim has some sort of idea. Rumors abound in research, after all. Tim must notice his nervousness because he stops walking, turning to face Jon with that same unbearable sincerity.

“Nothing untoward, I promise,” Tim says, and Jon believes him. Tim hasn’t lied to him yet. “I just don’t feel comfortable putting you on the tube, and you’re a long way from home while I’m right around the corner.” Jon still doesn’t respond, so Tim continues. “No pressure, honestly. I could call you a cab, it’s not a big deal-”

“No, that’s-that’s too expensive.” Living in London is hard enough, especially on a researcher’s salary. But to spend the night at Tim’s, as innocent as it may be, fills him with dread. There’s a reason he lives alone. There’s a reason it took him almost a year before he stayed the night at Georgie’s.

Sleep has never been kind to him.

Jon has nightmares. Terrible, horrifying visions of make-believe that leave him screaming and crying and choking on his breath. Georgie had been about ready to call an ambulance the first time she witnessed it, but Jon was able to talk her down.

“These happen every night?” she’d asked, her face a mix of pity and concern.

“Not every night,” he insisted. It was true. If he stayed up late, working himself to exhaustion, he could usually manage a dreamless sleep of at least five hours. But that came with its own difficulties; crankiness, irritability. It put a strain on most of his relationships.

Tim, though- Tim is kind and understanding. Beneath the mask of sociability and flirtation lies a serious, determined person. Compassionate, loving, but in a quiet way and with small gestures. He makes lists. He puts in time. He asks Jon what he wants when they go out to eat and he doesn’t laugh or roll his eyes when Jon carries on for too long.

“We can go to your place,” he whispers. “I-I think I’d like that.” Tim smiles and hooks an arm through his and Jon knows he’s made the right decision. Maybe tonight will be different. Maybe the wine will dull the terror that rules most of his life. The night is dark and Jon’s flat is cold and lonely.

Tim’s flat, on the other hand, is warm and cozy. It’s neat and organized, but cluttered enough to give it personality and charm. There’s a couch calling his name and he answers it, practically collapsing in the cushions as Tim lets out a little laugh.

“No going to sleep yet,” he instructs and Jon can’t help but let out a groan. The warmth and safety of the spot and the closeness of Tim has suddenly made him comfortably tired, and he’d like to slip off to sleep in this pleasant haze. “Not until you’ve had some food and water. I’ve even got those crusty little granola bars you like so much.”

“They’re not crusty,” he grumbles, his voice stifled by a pillow. But he’s not in a fighting mood and his mind’s currently swimming with the fact that Tim stocked his favorite snack.

“Very crusty, indeed,” Tim’s nudging him up into a sitting position and forcing water into his hands. “Drink up!”

“You’re very irritating, I hope you know,” Jon says as he leans his head onto Tim’s shoulder. Tim makes for a comfortable pillow.

“Aw, you love it.”

Maybe he does.

By the time he’s choked down the last of the bar, his eyes are fluttering and he can’t keep in his yawns. Tim puts a warm hand on his arm and it burns pleasantly as he pulls him up. “Time for bed, I think.”

The words startle Jon out of his haze and he blinks his eyes open, focusing on Tim’s gentle smile. “Er, I think-” he doesn’t want to disappoint the man, but he would rather be as cautious as possible. “I think it would be best if I slept out here.”

“On the couch?” Tim asks, his brow furrowing in confusion. “Oh- would you rather sleep alone?” Tim doesn’t seem too miffed about it, just confused, so Jon answers as honestly as he can.

“Yes.” He doesn’t want to, not really. But he needs to.

“Alright,” Tim agrees easily enough. “But you should take the bed, then. The sofa’s comfy but I know you have a bad back-”

“It’s fine for one night,” Jon responds. Forcing Tim to sleep on the sofa in his own flat seems terribly selfish.

“If you’re sure…”

“I am,” Jon assures, trying to convey his affection in a gentle smile. Tim returns it.

“I’ll just get you some sheets, then. Change of clothes, too.”

By the time Jon’s head hits the pillow, comfortably attired in Tim’s old joggers and t-shirt, he’s already half asleep. He thinks Tim’s already left the room but then he feels the warm pressure of a kiss to his forehead.

Perhaps he dreamed that, though.

__________

There’s a thread and it’s pulling Jon forward.

It’s not comfortable. Jon would rather stay here, in the library, surrounded by books and dim lights and knowledge he has control over. But there are whispers in the hallway, and someone’s telling him to go, go, go.

And go he does. Down stairs, so many stairs, more stairs than the institute ought to have. There is something watching and something pulling; Jon is being split in two and somehow this is worse than actually seeing the spiders and the eyes that have haunted him all these years. This, he feels in his soul. Something is at stake.

There’s a door. This is how it always ends, you see- with a door. And Jon’s fist, small and childish and grubby, raises to knock against the wood. It echoes too many times as Jon tries to step back, get off this porch and out of this nightmare but it is too late, the deed is done and the door is opening and a single, spindly black leg creeps out of the door hello, Mr. Spider-

“Jon!”

There are limbs holding him but it’s not the many-legged creature of his nightmares- they’re familiar and strong even as he thrashes against them but someone is screaming and the sound is haunting and painful-

And it’s him. Jon wrenches his eyes open to find himself safe and sound, held in place by Tim’s arms. His heart continues to stutter and he wheezes- Tim’s got a hand on his back and a soothing murmur going.

“You’ve got to breathe, Jon. Slow.” Tim takes his shaking hand and puts it to his own chest. “Like this. In and out. There you go. Nice and slow.” The words are calm and practiced; Tim’s done this before, with someone else. As his heartbeat resumes a normal rhythm, he wonders who.

There’s a hand on Jon’s face, gently wiping away tears he wasn’t aware he shed. Tim’s eyes are far-away, sort of, like he’s just going through the motions, slow and loving. “There we are,” he says as he finally meets Jon’s eyes. “Better now?”

“Y-Yes,” he croaks back. His hand is still gripping at Tim’s shirt but he doesn’t let go until the reality of the situation sets in. “Oh God- I’m- I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to wake you-”

“Is that why you slept out here?” Tim asks, his voice patient. “Does this happen a lot?”

“M-More than I care to admit.” Jon feels a sudden need to explain himself, to let Tim know he tries to keep it under control as best he can. “I’ve tried everything- tea, therapy, p-pills- it doesn’t work.” A note of frustration creeps into his voice. “Something doesn’t want me to sleep, I guess.”

“Just thought you were a workaholic, to be honest,” Tim pulls him into his side and Jon melts, the tension slowly leaving his body. “Should’ve known better. We work at the Magnus Institute, after all.” The laugh that comes from both of them is bitter. “D’you want to sleep in my bed, maybe? Just- just for company. I’ve been told that helps.”

“I-I don’t want to wake you.” The argument is weak and the both of them know it.

“You already have, love.” The endearment slips out unnoticed by Tim, but Jon hears it. “You’ll wake me either way, but I’d rather you didn’t wake up alone.”

“O-Oh.” There’s a lot of care in those words. Jon doesn’t know what to do with it, except agree. “Yes, I’ll- if, if you don’t mind-”

“Wouldn’t offer if I did.” He wouldn’t, Jon knows. Tim always means what he says when it comes to him.

So they curl up in his bed, an arm slung across Jon’s waist, his back to Tim’s chest. There are no spiders here, not in this bed that smells of dryer sheets and detergent and Tim. He’s almost asleep when the arm around his waist tightens suddenly.

“My brother always said the pressure helped. When he had bad dreams.” Jon opens his eyes.

Tim never mentioned a brother; it never came up in any of their conversations. Tim knows Jon is an only child, that he was brought up by his grandmother and had a lonely childhood. He didn’t realize, in all of their time together, that he knew so little of Tim’s own background, besides his publishing career.

Nobody liked to talk about what brought them to the Magnus Institute. It was like some unspoken rule, some shared trauma that somehow kept them all silent and apart.

“Your brother?” he whispers, turning over to see Tim’s face. Its dark, but he thinks he can see a brightness in Tim’s eyes like unshed tears.

“Danny.” Tim says the name like he’s asking for forgiveness that Jon can’t give. He sees a tear drip down the man’s face and he reaches for it, just like Tim did before. “He was...he was my little brother. And he was so, so good.” Tim’s voice breaks and something in Jon breaks too. “And something took him from me.” His expression is hard but his hand reaches out to lovingly trace Jon’s face, as if trying to memorize its shape.

“I’m sorry,” Jon knows his apology is not enough, that it will never fill the gap in Tim’s heart. Instead, he finds words spilling from his lips, as if sharing his own pain will help too. “I-I saw someone get taken, once. I didn’t- I didn’t love them, but- but it was because of me.” Tim’s hand is in his hair, tucking a curl behind his ear as his voice wobbles. “It should’ve been me.”

Tim draws him close and squeezes; Jon buries his face in the crook of his neck and inhales. “I’m glad it wasn’t you, Jon,” Tim whispers as he runs a hand down his back. “I’m glad it wasn’t you.” Jon isn’t Danny and Tim isn’t offering him absolution but it’s fine, for tonight.

Jon doesn’t dream.

ao3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27494077

#prompts #karliahs #tma #the magnus archives #jonathan sims #tim stoker #jontim #precanon #hurt/comfort #angst

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