#best planner for adhd

[smartplanr]

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[citizen-zero]

it’s 100% true that you don’t have to be productive all the time and you don’t have to meet some arbitrary standard of what counts as “productive” to have worth as a human being but oh god it is so painful to want to be productive yet not be capable of it

and I don’t mean productive like “I’m way ahead of schedule at work” cuz fuck that corny shit but productive in the sense of like. “I completed all the household cleaning tasks I set for today” or “I read/studied/wrote X amount” or “I made all the phone calls I had to make.” Like personal fulfillment and wellness and daily maintenance.

or even leisurely productivity like “I was able to focus on the book I’ve been wanting to read” or “I spent time working on my craft project” or “I wrote notes for my TTRPG campaign”

Like it sucks so bad to be held hostage by my own brain structure such that I struggle to be productive and accomplish my goals even when it’s stuff I actively enjoy and want to do. I just keep sitting here scrolling through my phone and getting distracted and all the while I’m acutely aware that it’s now been 4 hours since I said I’d start cleaning and I haven’t done anything

[luvyeni]

HOT MESS ,, 이제노

pairings ‎⸝⸝⸝ collegecrush!jeno x reader wc. 2.4k

genre. smut

🦢◞  includes ... oral ( fem receiving ), unprotected sex, praise kink , this is kinda angsty.

request. can u write a "campus crush" fic based on jeno's look at the airport please 🙏🩷

「 authors note 𖹭 」 ngl i didn't expect it to be so angsty but reader literally is me and my brain.

❪ masterlist! ❫

your brain was always on go; constantly it was like it never stopped, even when you would sleep it was like your brain wouldn't turn off— it was never ending, and becoming a college student; living on your own made it worse.

running into your class; the professors back was turned around so you snuck in , sitting down. “you're late again.” yoo jimin, your best friend; the complete opposite of you; she was constantly put together, it was like she had everything together. “i stayed up last night to study.” you whispered, huffing out pulling out your ipad, hair all over the place. “how did it go?” you stared at her stoically. “how do you think?” you said. “point taken.” she said.

“maybe you have like adhd or something.” karina walked next to you; watching you go through your messy planner. “because this can't be normal.” she said. “im sure the doctor has something to cure whatever this was.” you shrugged. “with my luck i would probably be too busy and forget to take it.” she laughed. “probably, you're just a hot mess and that's okay, i still love you anyway.” she wrapped her arms around you, calming you. “messy hair and disheveled clothes that i'm pretty sure you had on yesterday and all.”

jeno on the the hand; he seemed to have his life together— he never came to school looking crazy; even after a night out in which he was black out drunk with his group of friends, he'd turn up the next day, showered, shaven and ready to go on with his date. “it almost scary why aren't you hungover.”

haechan groaned, his head down low. “you out drunk me yesterday; jaemin left you in your dorm unable to pick yourself off the floor.” jeno smugly shrugged, his hair black hair was neatly styled, his outfit that he picked that morning neat on his body.. “i feel fine, maybe you should lay off the alcohol.” the boy would've lunged at the boy if he didn't feel like his head was gonna explode. “haechan look you and yn both look like you had a good time last night.”

jeno turned hearing your name, a small smile on his lips, one no one couldn't unless they were looking really close. “fuck off jaemin.” you huffed sitting down. “except yn looks like that all the time.” haechan said, yelling as you began bang on the metal table. “how's that headache? huh you asshole.” jeno held his hand out , stopping you. “you'll hurt yourself.”

he moved his hand away from you; that didn't really help your rapidly beating heart. along with the stress of school and your everyday life; jeno lee was another thing that raced throughout your already cluttered mind; he sometimes was the only thing that could calm your messy mind— not like he noticed or anything.

“she’ll hurt herself— she hurt me!” haechan cried out. “my head.” holding his head in his hands. “jimin hold me.” you all watched karina fight the whining boy off, you laughter making jeno smile slightly, only stopping when jaemin caught him; wiggling his eyebrows at the boy, jaemin was the only one who knew about his crush on the girl.

“you should ask her out.” jaemin said one day out of the blue. “yn, you should ask her out.” jeno was shocked; he thought he did a good job hiding his infatuation with you. “haechan isn't all the way there and renjun could care less, so of course they don't notice, but bro i'm your best friend , and i can tell , and you don't really hide , you literally write the notes down so she can study.” ever since that day, jaemin never let him live it down.

“yn you have a class soon.” jeno turned to you as you looked down at your phone. “oh yeah i better go.” you shot up. “my professor is gonna kill me if im late again.” you collected your things. “jeno don't you have this class too?” renjun asked, he nodded; calmly getting up, saying goodbye to everyone, before walking away; but walking slowly so you'd be able to catch up to him.

you both made it to the class, you found your seat in the back; jeno took a seat in the front like always, occasionally looking back to check on you— he felt bad, watching you stress out all the time, you could never seem to get anything right in your eyes; but in his eyes you were perfect.

“yn.” your professor stopped you as you were leaving out the door. “yes?” you stopped. “your research paper.” she started. “is there something wrong with it?” you sighed, she didn't have to say anything, but you knew. “listen what if i give you an extra day or two, go over it; read my notes and try again.” she said, you nodded. “thank you ma'am.” you turned walking out of the class, where jeno was waiting. “oh jeno you're still here?”

while waiting for you, jeno overheard your conversation with the professor. “yeah, everything okay?” you nodded. “just need to go home and get my head together so i can get this essay right this time.” he walked silently next to you, before he spoke up. “i can help you.” he said. “go over the essay with you.”

“y-you don't have to, it's all word vomit i don't want to put you through that.” he waved you off. “i don't mind it.” you were about to reject him again when he grabbed your arm, stopping you. “let me help you.” your eyes widened at the sudden touch. “sorry.” he said, removing his hand. “it-its okay.” you said, heart racing. “i can come over to your apartment and go over it with you.” he said. “and it won't be a problem?” he shook your head. “you'll never be a problem, okay?” you nodded. “o-okay.”

“come on let's go.”

it had been so long since you had anyone over besides karina and she was used to your madness; but it had been even longer since you had a cute guy over, and you weren't really planning on having one over— otherwise you would have cleaned your room. “it's a little messy.”

“it's okay, it's just clothes.” he smiled watching you frantically pick up the clothes, shoving them in your closet. “sit.” you pointed to your bed. “please, make yourself comfortable.” you said. “um …” you turned to jeno, your face losing all color— he was holding your bra in his hand. “did you forget something?”

you practically lunged at the boy to grab the item, throwing it into your closet. “let's get started.” you said; he smiled watching you go through your bag to pull out your laptop. “here.” you opened it, pulling up the essay. he took the laptop from your hands, your fingertips touching. “let's see, it can't be that bad.”

it was bad; but jeno didn't let you know that— well he tried. “um, okay.” he said, you frowned. “it's bad isn't it?” he sighed, reading through the essay, looking at you; your eyes were desperate. “i can help you fix it.” he said, you sighed. “it's useless.” taking away the laptop. “if only i can get my brain to stop just for a second , my essays won't be so shit.”

you hated this; your brain wouldn't stop, it was overwhelming. “hey.” jeno called your name, you bit at your nails in stress. “hey.” he stopped you, holding your hands down. “calm down , i told you i'll help you wouldn't i?” he said. “i’ve seen worse essays trust me, jaemin will plagiarize if i let him.” he laughed. “i can help you fix this, but you have to calm down first.” your eyes traveled to where your hands met. “you're so cute but you're a hot mess.”

“me-me? cute.” he chuckled; but you were freaking out inside and out, he shook his head, pushing his glasses up his nose bridge. “let's finish this okay?” you nodded. “o-okay.”

after going over the mess of a essay; reading the notes the teacher gave you and jeno talking you through it; you finally put together an essay that was at least readable and would satisfy your professor. “thank you so much jeno, you saved my life.” you smiled. “it was all you, you'll do good if you just turn that pretty little head off and learn to breathe.”

“that's easy for you to say, your life is so put together.” you said. “i can barely get out of bed on time, it's like you said im a hot mess.”

“you don't want to hear my problems.” you said. “the essay is done and you probably have things to do, you can … mph” before you could get the rest out; jenos lips were on yours in feverish kiss, pulling away to give you enough air before his lips were on yours again.

he pulled away again, ready to kiss you again, but you held his chest signaling him to stop immediately. “did i make you uncomfortable?” he said. “no-no.” you said flustered. “just, it happened so fast, and now my head and my heart is racing.” you were rambling on and on and it made jeno want to kiss you again, you were so cute. “then just turn that pretty head off and let me help you.” he looked at you with so much want in his eyes. “okay?”

you nodded, he held the side of your face, pulling you into another kiss; his lips swiping across your bottom lip, sticking his tongue in your mouth , his grip on your waist, lifting your shirt. “lifting your arms for me pretty.” he took your shirt off , throwing it to the floor. “he-hey just because i use my floor as a hamper doesn't mean you do.”

he laughed, “i'll be sure to fold your clothes neatly the next time i fuck you.” he pulled your pants down, leaving you in your mismatched bra and panties. “baby you really are a hot mess aren't you.” he kissed your stomach once he laid you on your back. “i like that.” he reached for your waistband, pulling them down your leg. “keep them open pretty baby.” he kissed the sides of your thighs. “such a pretty little pussy.”

you felt the warmth of his lips as he kissed your cunt. “j-jeno.” it had been a while since you've felt anything like this, and lord was jeno good at what he was doing , licking your folds , his nose brushing up against your clit, for the first time in a very long time; there was only one thing on your mind— it was jeno.

“fuck jeno!” you moaned, gripping his dark locks. “im… im gonna cum.” you whined feeling him removing his lips for your clit , one of his fingers invading your hole. “you gonna cum for me?” you nodded, he groaned , his cock hard; he was ready to fuck you. “y-yes.” you gasped. “pl-please let me cum.”

“shit.” he cursed, adding another finger, curling them inside you. “so tight baby, go ahead and let go for me, make a mess all over my fingers for me.” you gasped out his name , moaning as you came. “good fucking girl.” he fingered you through your orgasm, until you were holding his wrist , grinding against it. “je-jeno.” he no longer looked put together; his hair messy, clothes disheveled— even his brain was running a mile a minute, he finally knew what it was always like in your head. “you look so pretty when you are cumming.”

ridding himself of his clothes; folding your legs in half, giving him a view of your cunt. “pretty little pussy, want me to stuff my fat cock inside?” slotting his cock in between your folds; moving his hips, the tip of his cock catching your clit , both of you moaning. “pl-please fuck me.” you begged. “shh , baby i got you.”

positioning his leaky tip at your entrance, slipping inside. “fuck.” he sighed, your cunt sucking him in. “so tight.” he gasped as he fully bottomed out. “je-jeno you're so big.” you moaned out; his hand coming up to your throat. “yeah, you like my cock stretching your tiny pussy?” he hissed as you tightened around him, your eyes crossed as he plowed into you. “did i fuck you're pretty head empty?” he questioned, a moan following. “had so much fuck so much going on inside it , now it's nothing but my cock.”

he tightened his grip around your throat; speeding up his thrust. “de-deeper jeno, fuck!” the desperation in your voice , you needed to feel him; the deeper he went , the tighter his hand wrapped around your throat— the less you thought about anything, all your troubles floated away. “je-jeno im gonna cum.”

“yeah?” he speed up, cursing as he chased his orgasm. “hold it just a little baby, fuck , wanna cum with you.” his forehead was pressed against his. “i-i can't , jeno im gonna cum.” you gasped , your fingernails digging into his arms. “ugh , fuck!” he cursed , rubbing your clit. “fuck i'm gonna cum , cum for me pretty baby.”

he made direct eye contact with you as you came , cunt gripping him like a vice. “shit!” he pulled out , roughly stroking his cock as he came, his warm seed splashing on your stomach. “fuck fuck fuck.” he squeezed his base , milking himself, groaning. “shit.”

“you want another?” he toyed with your clit. “your little clit is still desperate for my attention.” you moaned , his finger filling you up. “je-jeno.” your glazed over eyes. “your pretty little mind is floating somewhere else isn't it?” he chuckled. “fucked you too dumb?” you gasped , moving your hips, grinding against his hand. “go ahead, cum for me again, pretty.”

you felt like you were floating; mind empty as you came down from second high. “come back to me, pretty girl.” he coached you back down , a smile on his face. “good girl.” he removed his fingers from your cunt. “you did so good for me.”

“something on your mind?” jeno asked as he watched you pick at your nail beds for five minutes. “there's always something on my mind.” you laughed , about to bite your nails , he grabbed your hand, holding your hand down , rubbing your knuckles. “not when you're occupied.” he smirked , you slapped his naked chest. “it's not that.” you said. “it's you.” he tilted his head. “what do you mean?” you shrugged. “you can tell me.” he said, you sighed.

“when you're around you help me not think, you calm me.” you confessed. “so what you're saying you're a hot mess without me?” you pouted. “why are you making fun of me?” you whined , he laughed , wrapping his arms around your body. “thats fine with me.” he kissed your forehead. “you're a hot mess.”

“but you're my hot mess.”

©LUVYENI

[rosemarydisaster]

I made some sort of alignment classification based on whether they're impulsive or if they plan ahead for the Batfam. Feel free to correct me (politely please, I'll cry) or to add your opinion. I'm not trying to be super canon, just based on their characters' vibes.

Bruce Wayne: 100% planner. This man could be a Bene Gesserit, plans within plans, and they always work even if they shouldn't (because DC can't have him be wrong). It's like a choose your own adventure, you follow the plan and each time something new happens that is sure to chase things up he pulls a subsection specifically for it. Senior Justice League Members just don't question him anymore no matter what. "You had a contingency for getting invaded by mind controlling ballerina spiders? Yeah, sure, tell us all about it".

Barbara Gordon: she plans around her impulses. She is self aware enough at this point to know she's a bit of a hot head. It is what it is, she's called Batman an Emo Boy's idea of Therapy enough times to his face to know she just can't help herself with some stuff. So instead of working against it she plans around it. In the end, it was her plan all along. Canary thinks she could just hold her tongue, but considering the vigilantes Oracle manages, her experience in planning for these situations is invaluable.

Dick Grayson: Impulsive, not because he can't make plans or because he isn't smart. Quite the opposite. He just has that ADHD dog in him. He would be guiding the Titans through a mission and they'd be thinking "Woah, everything is going according to his plan", meanwhile inside his head is Bear Grylls saying "Improvise, Adapt, Overcome". It's not so much that he comes up with plans on the spot but he ends up changing it along the way because he thought of something better for that specific situation. He may use B's protocols for a general structure but then trusts his instinct to come up with something better on the spot.

Cassandra Cain: Neither. She's not one to be coming up with elaborate schemes but, as much as she relies on her instinct, she's able to stop before jumping. She doesn't need to plan, she knows what works. She observes and then takes the best course of action. When Bruce goes on and on about the importance of planning she just answers "Skill issue" and leaves.

Jason Todd: impulsive planner. This is a man that makes plans, okay? He's theatre kid coded, he needs to know his little monologues by heart. The thing is, he's also very emotional and has the impulse control of a toddler in front of the cookie jar. He can't help himself, he has to punch the asshole and make the witty comeback or he will explode. The outlaws have been grilled to death on the importance of following the plan but then watch him like ten minutes later throw it out the window. They find it both endearing and annoying.

Stephanie Brown: Queen of Chaos. She can plan. She's good at it too btw, she just doesn't want to if she can avoid it. She works best when she's improvising and it drives Bruce and Tim up the walls. They just hate to see women winning. She's the best one out of all of them at turning a mistake to her advantage in a matter of seconds. It's quite impressive.

Tim Drake: Chaotic planner. Everyone is so sure Tim is a mini Bruce and to a certain extent, if you squint your eyes, then yes. But Young Just Us know the truth: his plans are extremely effective but only in the most chaotic way possible. There's the Batman plan, and there's the Red Robin plan, which is like the first one but faster and with more fire. He also has to be periodically reminded to take into account his own wellbeing when making his little schemes.

Duke Thomas: plans on the go. I don't know how else to explain it but it's like those sequences in the Sherlock movies (the ones with RDJ) where he's watching his surroundings and opponents almost in slow-mo till he puts together a plan. It's similar to Dick from the outside, but if you pay attention you can see the wheels turning in his head as he goes along. He actually stops and thinks (metaphorically, most of the time his thinking is done while he distracts enemies).

Damian Al Gul Wayne: he's a strategist, not a planner. This is an important distinction because whenever Batman or Red Robin are explaining one of their convoluted plans he feels like he's actively losing braincells. He's closer to Cassandra in the way he prefers a more direct solution. He also gets palpitations anytime Jason or Stephanie just start doing things without thinking. If he knew what Dick's thought process was he would have probably developed an anxiety disorder in his time as Dick's robin. He doesn't understand the need for such high detail planning and hates the idea of making it along the way. No, he just needs to come up with the most efficient strategy and that's all.

[lemondropdancer]

ADHD Study Tips

Novel Spaces

One of the biggest things that aids me in studying is a change of scenery. Although, many people suggest having a dedicated workspace for homework and studying. That isn’t the case for me because of my ADHD I need new novel spaces. Therefore I’ve created a few spaces within my home. Solely, because a lot of spaces such as cafe’s have too many distractions such as: customers in and out, constant changing noises, and unfamiliarity.

As the mini adhd coach states the need for novel things is because it provides dopamine and fuels ADHD interest based brains. Oftentimes following the dopamine can be harmful however by creating novel spaces it makes following the dopamine useful and takes advantage of it. It’s a great motivator and it’s a lot of fun to change things up.

New situations are the most motivating for those with ADHD. Each place creates a new situation. And as soon as one becomes boring you can switch to another. I tend to move from my kitchen table to my bedroom set up.

"Notes & Coffee" by VienoR27 is licensed under CC BY-NC 2.0

"Kitchen Table Set Up" by VienoR27 is licensed under CC BY-NC 2.0

"Sofa Set Up" by VienoR27 is licensed under CC BY-NC 2.0

"Bedroom Set Up" by VienoR27 is licensed under CC BY-NC 2.0

Body Doubling

Another major thing that helps me focus is body doubling. Body doubling is when you have another person around doing some sort of task to help your brain focus better. For me I like to invite my coworkers who are in college over to body double or ask my boyfriend to body double with me. Additionally, body doubling is why I prefer to work at the kitchen table because my boyfriend can be cooking or cleaning while also acting as a body double. 

Body doubling can also work in public spaces. When I went to college in person rather than online I achieved body doubling in the library. It’s also possible to virtually body double. I tend to do that with friends in discord. Study with me videos on YouTube have also helped with body doubling.

Reminders/Planners

Something else that helps but is often hit or miss with a lot of folks with ADHD is planners, reminders, calendars, etc. Some people forget about these lists of tasks as do I. However, I make it so obnoxious that I can’t and make sure it’s everywhere. I use a physical planner for almost everything from assignments, to-do’s, and due dates. I use my Google Calendar for major due dates as well as meetings and my work schedule. I then also use Momentum, a chrome extension for a to-do list. In addition to that I write out a schedule by the hour as well as a to-do list in order of priority.

Although mine is a bit excessive, I think having a physical as well as a digital is very helpful especially if the digital can send reminders.

Follow the Dopamine not the Priority

Despite the goal of getting things done in order of priority, sometimes it’s easier to start on the task that’ll get the dopamine flowing and get you into that flow state. More often than not doing that task and then the higher priority task is faster than sitting on the higher priority task for a lot longer because your brain simply doesn’t want to focus. Therefore, sometimes following the dopamine is the best option.

Create a Reward System

When studying for large bursts I tend to use my breaks as little reward periods. Usually because I’m studying with a coworker we devise the breaks in terms of assignment or when both of us are starting to zone out and get less productive. For us because our study sessions overlap meals we’ll do our rewards such as going and grabbing food or getting boba and things of that nature. Once it was a Target run to get supplies for a root beer float which was the following break.

Fidget

Find ways to fidget that allow you to remain focused simultaneously. I tend to like to bounce my feet or chew gum. However, depending on what you’re doing you can use putty, stress balls, fidget cubes, etc.

I think this helps with restlessness and remaining calm while doing homework. I’ve also found it helps me avoid getting too overwhelmed especially if I’m behind on tasks or have procrastinated.

Use Caffeine & Sugar but WISELY

I tend to use caffeine when studying. I’m currently not medicated due to other conditions. So I use caffeine to self-medicate in a way. For this to work though you have to find the sweet spot that doesn’t make you sleepy or overly anxious. So it tends to have to be sips that are tapering out the caffeine slowly.

[glamrockmike]

rough gregory sketch in the margins of my adhd planner, he totally didn’t just dismantle someone’s best friend

[ipostwhatiwant1202]

As a Dad: Mikey Edition

Permissive/Authoritative

• baby brother, used to being babied by older brothers

• you'd think mikey is the least qualified to be a parent given his track record, but out of all his brothers, he's the most qualified (hear me out)

• doesn't read books, doesn't watch movies, no he thinks of how his bros and splinter were with him. definitely matured quickly

• biologically or adopted children, regardless he just takes to parenting like it's literally nothing

• 0-8 stage is the toughest because he's getting used to being a dad but he's a quick study and can now make a bottle and change the diaper at the same time

• he's the king at getting the children to sleep at bedtime and naptime

• he also is really good at making baby friendly games too, not only teach them to crawl/talk/walk, but to stimulate brain growth without realizing it

• he carries on conversations with them like they know what he's saying (i dont make the rules)

• ages 2-8 are his favorite because now he can actually get to know them

• like donnie, he's very good at de-escalation but he's also good at compromising

• not a yeller but he makes it clear that he's frustrated and time outs are frequently used

• his adhd really takes over at this stage because now he can do cool stuff with his kids and get away with it (mostly)

• gentle parenting all the way

• now puberity at ages 13-17, yeah he got a taste of his own medicine

• he surely wasn't disrespectful to splinter, but he had his mouthy moments and now his kids are that way

• he leaves the grounding to his partner, but he's always the one to have the mature talk with his kids

• the fun parent all the way, but lowkey feared

• let him no where near their homework

• king of school projects though

• knows everything there is to know about the kids cause the man is observant

• not gender biased but lord please bless him with a little girl

• dress up, tea parties, makeup, the whole nine yards, but they're also always dirty

• if he has a son, expect that child to always be dirty some how

• it's babysitting

• always takes special interest in the things his kids are learning/doing

• definitely teaches them how to bake and cook

• party planner for all birthdays and holidays and it's always a blast for the kids

• definitely has a hard time saying no to the kids but he tries

• teaches the kids respect and how to be polite

• they pull pranks with him all the time because he's still a big kid, he likes to have fun. "let'em be kids" is his motto

• bedside manner is excellent cause literally nothing grosses him out

• always makes sure his kids can talk to him about anything

• dad noises, dad burps/farts, dad sneezes, all the dadisms

• nicknames come out of left field and a lot of the time have no special meaning

• biggest cheerleader and supporter

• loves texting and emojis, but he's a facetimer

• he definitely has inside jokes with the kiddos

• never misses anything and makes sure he's always there no matter what

• he corrupts those little shits in the best way possible

[mrghostrat]

I remember you posting a blurred gif of the outline of atws, so if you don't mind me asking, how do you do that? Like, get the outline onto paper and not just scenes in your head. That's something I've always struggled with, because it's hard to write without an outline, but hard to do the outline when I don't have a first draft? I'm not sure how to explain it so I hope this makes any sense at all lmao

ahh so fair! some people just don't operate that way and you gotta do what's best for your brain. no point exhausting all your energy trying to squeeze into a "standard writing process" that'll make writing even more difficult for yourself.

under the cut, i'm going to explain my writing process every step of the way, using scenes of ATWS. i hope it helps in some way? i don't think it's anything special, but this is just how i write to appease my adhd.

first, this might help: i once used storyplanner.com when i didn't know how to even start a story and i loved it. it's a great tool that can hold your hand every step of the way, or just prompt you to think on your own. there's over 20 planners that ask different questions like "what's your character's major flaw?" "what's the inciting incident?" "what outside elements hinder the character?" etc that will present you with a complete story structure when you're done with it.

ok, now, how i write:

as for the post in reference, that's the 2nd stage of my writing process. i get carried away with tangents and hone in on details, so i plan in dot points to try and force myself to keep it simple and stay zoomed out.

i just write what happens in chronological order, and if i have an idea for a later scene (or something that i just want to happen, but don't know when/where/how), i note that in a separate document that i can refer to while i plan. this also allows me to gloss over vague sections to keep my writing flow going.

stage 1:

i've started using Notion's "toggle list" feature to minimise the less important parts of a scene and keep myself focused on the overarching plot during this stage. this is what the first point looks like:

i go beat by beat, essentially amounting to an elevator pitch for each stage of my story. "crowley and aziraphale are streamer roommates" + "people start to notice they each live with someone and the speculation starts" + "crowley and aziraphale interact on twitch" + "they attend the edinburgh meetup" etc.

i finish a story before i move on from this stage. i won't start writing something in earnest until i know how it ends.

stage 2:

this is what you saw in my gif, and why that page was so long. that's every scene i'm going to write in the story.

sometimes i jump straight from stage 1 to writing, but ATWS required a lot more figuring out before i started any kind of prose. here i'm basically noting down the details of what each scene is, the brunt of what's happening. this is when i have to figure out those "vague sections" i glossed over earlier.

it's still just intended to be a rough outline so i know where the characters are and what's moving their relationship along. most of these dot points are short because i've already thought about them a thousand times, and may have more details noted down in a different document.

meanwhile some of them i'm planning out the scene as i'm dotting it, making not of dialogue that i want to include.

stage 3: my bracket method

i only use this stage when i'm struggling to write and need to baby step into it. this is my "bracket method" in which i write the scene without, like... caring? some people may consider this "double handling" which may drive you mad, but it's the most helpful thing i've ever done for my process.

i switch tenses, i write how i chat (no capitals etc) and just word vomit the scene without focusing on prose. ATWS came quite easily at first, and i didn't need to use stage 3 until i got to chapter 4 and hadn't written in a few days.

stage 4:

this is writing the actual prose, but i wanted to include it so you can see the differences, to help better understand my notes/planning/outlining stages:

and this is what a scene looks like with stage three bridging the gap:

[ineffectualdemon]

Hey ADHD people who live in my phone. The Teenager has very important exams this year and needs something that will help them keep track of projects, homework and revision.

We're doing our best to support them and set up a schedule that works for them (and gives them time to rest and chill) but can any of you recommend an app or planner or method that actually works for you that will help us track this stuff?

An app would be better but anything that seems to work for you is welcome. We really want to do our best to set them up for success

[myadhdchronicles]

Navigating Life with ADHD: My Journey, Tips, and Hacks

Living with ADHD has its unique challenges, but it's also a journey filled with creativity, resilience, and countless small victories. I've learned to embrace my ADHD and discovered some invaluable tips, hints, and hacks along the way. In this blog, I'll share my personal insights and strategies that have made life with ADHD more manageable and even exciting.

1. Embrace Your ADHD:

Accepting your ADHD is the first step to managing it effectively. It's a part of who you are, and that's okay.

Learn about your specific strengths and weaknesses associated with ADHD. You might be exceptionally creative or have hyperfocus superpowers!

2. Create a Structured Routine:

Establishing a daily routine can provide a sense of stability and predictability.

Use digital calendars, planners, and reminders to keep track of appointments, tasks, and deadlines. I particularly like Sunsama, it is very ADHD-friendly. Habitica is good too, it is a gamified digital calendar that engages the ADHD brain much better than regular planners.

3. Prioritize and Set Goals:

ADHD brains can easily get overwhelmed by too many tasks. Prioritize your to-do list and break tasks into smaller, manageable goals.

Celebrate your achievements, no matter how small.

4. Minimize Distractions:

Create a dedicated workspace that's free from distractions.

Consider using noise-canceling headphones, fidget toys, or white noise to maintain focus.

Learn what kind of workspace works best for you, it's not the same for every ADHD brain.

5. Time Management Techniques:

Use the Pomodoro Technique (working in short, focused bursts with breaks) to stay on track.

Set timers for tasks to prevent hyperfocus and procrastination.

6. Medication and Therapy:

Consult a medical professional to discuss medication options.

Cognitive-behavioral therapy can help you develop coping strategies and improve executive functioning skills, but know your own ADHD brain because it does not work for all of them.

7. Mindfulness and Meditation:

Mindfulness practices can help you stay present and reduce anxiety.

Try meditation to improve concentration and self-awareness.

Meditation and mindfulness do not have to be the typical sit still and clear your-mind things they are for non-ADHD brains, for a lot of ADHD brains we need to move so something like knitting/crocheting, going for a walk, or sitting outside in nature with your dog are our forms of mindfulness and meditation.

8. Stay Organized:

Use color coding, labels, and file systems to keep your physical and digital spaces organized.

Daily checklists can be a game-changer.

Know your own ADHD brain and make your system one that works for your brain or organization will continue to be a struggle.

9. Don't Fear Mistakes:

It's okay to make mistakes. Learn from them and keep moving forward.

Perfectionism can be your enemy; aim for progress, not perfection.

Learn to let good enough be good enough, perfection does not exist.

10. Get Adequate Sleep and Exercise:

Prioritize good sleep hygiene; it can significantly impact your ADHD symptoms.

Regular physical activity can boost focus and mood.

11. Utilize ADHD-Related Apps:

Explore ADHD-focused apps designed to help with time management, organization, and focus.

Some popular options include Todoist, Forest, Trello, Clarify ADHD, Sunsama, and Fabulous.

12. Seek Support and Community:

Connect with others who have ADHD through support groups or online forums.

Share your experiences and learn from the journeys of others.

Living with ADHD doesn't mean you're destined to struggle. By embracing your uniqueness and applying these tips, hints, and hacks, you can take control of your life. ADHD has its challenges, but it can also be a source of creativity, innovation, and unique perspectives. Remember, you're not alone, and there's a vibrant community of people who understand and support you on this journey. Embrace your ADHD, and together, we can navigate the world with success and resilience. See you next time, ADHD Team!

[smartplanr]

Smartplannr: The Best Planner for ADHD to Boost Productivity

Being organized and efficiently managing your time might provide special problems for people who live with ADHD (Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder). Thankfully, there are resources and solutions available to help people with ADHD increase their daily productivity and routines. One such tool that is becoming more and more popular among people with ADHD is Smartplannr, which is widely regarded as the greatest planner for this use.

Smartplannr is aware of the unique requirements of people with ADHD. It's more than just a planner; it's a dynamic tool designed to assist users in overcoming typical ADHD-related difficulties like forgetfulness, impulsivity, and time management issues.

Key Features of Smartplannr:

Layout Customization: With Smartplannr, you can design your planner to reflect your individual tastes. You can personalize it to meet your requirements and preferences by selecting the layout, color schemes, and parts that work best for you.

Clear and Simple Design: The planner's uncomplicated, uncluttered layout lessens confusion. It minimizes distractions that could divert attention by presenting information in an organized, simple-to-read format.

Goal-Setting and Goal-Tracking: For people with ADHD, setting and attaining objectives can be difficult. With specific areas in Smartplannr for goal-setting and progress monitoring, users can feel motivated and accomplished.

Conclusion

SmartPlanr is not just a budget planner; it's an innovative and advanced tool specifically designed to empower individuals with ADHD to take control of their finances in a smart and effective manner. With its tailored features and user-friendly interface, SmartPlanr offers a promising solution to the unique challenges of managing finances while living with ADHD. Say goodbye to financial stress and hello to a more organized and secure future with SmartPlanr.

Visit: https://smartplanr.com/

[syoddeye]

random headcanons for simon, gaz, and soap.

simon quietly hums or sings along to music when he's in the zone, working on a project or hobby. he listens to a surprising amount across genres. however, he usually only knows a quarter of the song or the chorus. he goes in and out of it as his focus sharpens or wanes. but do not call him on flubbing the lyrics. he'll either deny having ever sung along or dig his heels in and insist he's right. if you try to pull up the words on your phone, he plucks it from your fingers and sets it somewhere you can't reach.

gaz is the dream planner for trips. he thinks of everything. food allergies? noted. limitations? no sweat. passes and tickets? he's got the digital copy and two printed copies. if plan 'a' falls through, you're covered through at least plan 'e'. the best part is that it's all so seamless; everything feels natural. spontaneous, even. all he asks is for a few hours of alone time, whether spent on the beach, in a café, or with you on top back at the hotel.

soap doesn't tolerate other people in the kitchen when he's cooking. he's a decent home chef but often shoots for the moon and overextends himself. he'll have several pots and pans on the burners and something in the oven. insists you sit down, relax, and simply keep him company. he alternates between chopping vegetables, mixing drinks, and setting the table. it's a miracle nothing burns. the kitchen is always a disaster, though. (and, inspired by p's adhd + soap hcs, he's riddled with bumps, bruises, and burns from doing too much.)

[writingquestionsanswered]

I've seen across the web multiples tips for outlining/plotting when you have ADHD, however, I feel like I kinda have the opposite problem: I'm autistic and I always feel a big need of minimum surprises, doing things methodically and planning ahead of time, but my stories don't quite flow and I may need to work a non-forced pantser mindset, so if you gave me any advice on how to embrace a less outlined writing, I'd be eternally grateful.

Middle Ground Between Planning and Pantsing

It sounds like you need a middle ground between planning and pantsing, but it may take some trial and error to find one that works for you. Here are some possibilities, though:

1 - Do a Beginning to End Summary - Most of the time when people talk about outlining a story, this is what they're talking about. Just doing an in-depth beginning to end summary. However, you can adjust the depth of your summary to suit your needs, which makes it a great tool for when you need something with just the right balance of planning and spontaneity to fit your unique set of needs. Try free writing a summary of the story as though you were explaining it to someone else. Talk about as much of what's going to happen as you know or can flesh out as you go. Just having this in hand when you write can be helpful. If you find you need more structure, you can go into more detail. If you find you need less, you can pull back.

2 - Use a Story Structure Template - I've found that 90% of the time when writers struggle with planning vs pantsing and/or outlining, it's because they don't have a good understanding of how stories work and how they're generally structured. How stories work and how they're structured does depend on the type of story you're writing, but outside of experimental or deeply literary stories, most stories do have some sort of structure. You can learn more about plot and story structure, along with suggestions for story structure templates, in my Plot & Story Structure master list of posts.

3 - Do a Scene List - I'm mostly a planner, but I have to be careful not to let myself get bogged down with too much planning and too many details. So, for me, the best middle ground between planning and pantsing has been scene lists. I love scene lists because they're such a straightforward road map to your story, while at the same time having the depth flexibility of a beginning to end summary. You can put in as much or as little detail as you want. A scene list can be a just a list of scene titles that just let you know what's going on in the scene, like: Scene 1 - Hunting with Gale. Scene 2 - The Reaping. Or, you can do a brief or in-depth summary of what happens in each scene. Or you can even do what I do, which is a fairly extensive data table containing things like when and where the scene takes place, who's in it, plot point, summary, etc.

4 - Do Chapter Summaries - If you prefer not to break your story down into scenes, you can do chapter summaries instead. Like a scene list, this can be as light or in-depth as a scene list, from a list of chapter titles or working titles that suggest what happens, to in-depth summaries of what happens in each chapter.

5 - Do a Timeline - Timelines are kind of like scene lists in that they break your story down into important events/moments, and you can choose how deep to go. There are a also a lot of different formats you can use for a timeline, but you might want to start out by doing an old-fashioned line drawn on paper, then mark in the most important events. From there, you can start filling in the next most important events, then the slightly less most important, zooming in as much as you want to.

I hope something here will work for you!

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

I’ve been writing seriously for over 30 years and love to share what I’ve learned. Have a writing question? My inbox is always open!

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[sout999]

adhd talk

the third truly unsung project alongside my film and dissertation was the weird amount of targeted effort i had to put into Completing Anything Big As A Neurodivergent Person Whose Brain Is A Crazy Off The Rails Train Staffed and Patronised Entirely By Multiple Exact Copies Of The Squirrel From Ice Age

which is a description like 99/100 people reading this can relate to, but i think a sentiment i see less often and therefore feel kind of stupid and stubborn and lonesome about is "adhd is innate but is also exasperated by hectic lifestyle/modern instant gratification machines so if i fix my habits around those i can cure myself forever". which is silly and wrong but also i feel abit disconnected from adhd social media culture and cant cope just relating to it (which is all it seems to be sometimes) but learning to harness or tame it to do the things that are really important to me

i felt really cringe tbh having to look up youtube videos of HARVARD STUDENT REVEALS PRO STUDY TRICK and then narrowing it down to specifically adhd-focused study videos and keeping a planner and setting aside specific time to study studying and practising anti-academic meltdown journaling techniques and reading fucking atomic habits but i really didn't want to contribute to my abhorrent academic record following me all through undergrad. in fact i wish i had done this sooner but i was not self aware enough to consider the fact

probably the best change i made was severely cutting down or being mindful of social media time, i don't backread my tl anymore and have more moments of awareness when i find myself dumbly scrolling and realize i dont want to be doing this, and then wondering what i actually Do want to be doing. i keep a book nearby to read, and have also swapped a lot of social media time to sketching-off-pinterest time. reading about the psychology behind social media apps is also super interesting, although i always feel like a paranoid wacko conspiracy theorist talking about it. stuff like how negativity and judgemental behaviour is good for engagement (and therefore ad revenue), and how if all posts on your tl were interesting you wouldn't be as addicted to social media as you are, therefore microblogging employs a slot machine/gacha system where you "roll" for posts by logging on and hope to get a good one. it's a little full on but the more i think of it as a revolting and evil machine the more incentive i have to do something else with my time ^q^

a harder thing to do was, in the late stages of the project, the real crunch time month, avoid everything that could become a huge hyperfixation, and then eventually even minor distractions or fixations. because i know if i got super obsessed with something i'd just be up posting about it or drawing fanart. i had to bar myself from persona 3 remake and elden ring dlc and all these other shiny new releases, and the mobile games i was playing... i look forward to catching up on them now. i took up reading books a lot more because unfortunately thats just not as exciting. in the last month of film work i stopped listening to music on my computer so i wouldnt get drawing or animation ideas to distract me from film work. as of writing this i havent listened to music in like 40 days guys 😱 at the same time i am the kind of person who needs background noise to work, so i have:

watched novum's four hour hereditary video essay three times

watched novum's seven hour midsomar video essay three times

watched that one five hour bojack horseman retrospective twice

listened to audiobooks of the Britney Spears biography, Jennette McCurdy biography, three Playboy Bunny biographies (i was on some sort of lady bopgraphy kick i guess), and a few fiction books

rewatched all of bojack horseman

started on House MD and got a few seasons in before i finished the project, amazingly the perfect show to look away from bc of all the medical stuff, how many lumbar punctures do you need to show like seriously

honorable mention to the learned skill of communication and being honest and picking your battles and killing your darlings which is a larger part of managing mental illness than i cared to admit but one of the hardest ones because it involved confronting things and making big painful drastic changes and then having to tell the faculty about them. sometimes i'd be stuck on a piece of animation work for weeks/months, then go back and change the underlying idea to one i'm actually passionate about, and do the animation work in one day using newly found magical hyperfocus passion power. it's crazy! but being able to be confident about taking those steps rather than keeping on with what you're "supposed" to do went a long way.

i very much look forward to listening to a music and playing some video games properly now and being pulverized like a small victorian child from the sheer amount of fun i'm having. i'd say it was all worth it and a fun experiment in channeling the magical humours of passion and boredom and i hope it will help me with future projects too. i Am super burnt out though x__ x thanks for reading and for all your support up until now!

[gravity-barbie]

The Sparrows dating someone with ADHD HCs

Request

Viktor version

Masterlist

Marcus Hargreeves

-Marcus is understanding, he has to deal with siblings with far worse quirks than any of yours, things like your distractibility and hyperactivity rarely get to him

-Still, he is a responsible type, and if you’re not the best at managing your symptoms his leader instincts kick in and he goes out of his way to help you break bad habits and and bring some order into your life

-He’s a natural problem-solver and you have plenty to go around, it may feel overbearing or even patronising at times, but really the amount of things he does to make your life easier in between his already packed schedule is very sweet

-You two are quite different so some (mostly harmless) clashing is to be expected, he wishes you had more direction and caution, you wish he was more spontaneous and relaxed, but with proper communication these differences just make you a better match

Ben Hargreeves

-Ben’s willing to adjust to your ‘difficult’ traits, for instance, before he knew you had adhd, he would get offended and annoyed by you zoning out or easily getting distracted from him, and honestly even now it sometimes makes him a bit self-conscious but he works to manage those feelings

-He himself is an irritable and impatient person, (something you may have in common) so he does get frustrated with you sometimes but he always scolds himself for it, especially since he knows you tolerate worse faults from him

-If he ever sees anyone else get frustrated with you he’s so outraged and protective, he’d absolutely get in a fight over it

-Once he’s used to it he really likes your spontaneous nature, he does have a very fun side, so he’s always up for wild outings you suggest in the middle of the night or anything else like that

Fei Hargreeves

-You and Fei are pretty dissimilar, she’s cautious, collected, a planner, whereas you pretty much can’t help being a bit reckless and disorganised, but though it takes some getting used to, Fei isn’t bothered by your differences, if anything she’s kind of fascinated by them

-She offers advice sometimes, like reminders of consequences you tend not to consider, but if you don’t ask for her help she’s not going to overstep, she respects your right to make your own choices, even one’s she’d never make

-If you do want her help though, she’s the perfect person to ground you, incredibly helpful with things like organisation and navigating your more difficult emotions, without ever taking all responsibility off of you

-Fei doesn’t like being cooped up much more than you do, so the two of you enjoy a lot of physical, outdoorsy activities together, which are great for both burning through your energy and bonding with her

Alphonso Hargreeves

-Alphonso can be just as unfocused and unorganised as you are so he doesn’t hold that against you, if anything he’s kind of glad that’s something you share cause it means you can’t hold it against him either

-Though neither of you have the best life skills which can be a problem, he definitely wishes he could offer you more help when you’re struggling

-Where you really differ is your energy levels, he’d be content to just cuddle all day and you can hardly sit still through the length of a movie, he does actually love your spontaneity but he can only participate in small doses

-You’re probably easily stressed and irritated which is a little difficult for him since he really just wants to live life as comfortably as he can, but on the upside because of that he’s rarely a cause of your stress and is great at relaxing you

Sloane Hargreeves

-Those traits you’ve probably been scolded for your whole life, being hyperactive, emotional, even thoughtless, Sloane finds them so endearing, as there isn’t a part of you that she doesn’t accept wholeheartedly

-She’ll gladly offer help if you need it, for instance she likes leaving little post-it notes around your place with important reminders and sweet affirmations, however she’s not overbearing, she knows how frustrating it is to be micromanaged and trusts you to make your own decisions

-Maybe it’s because she was raised around some of the rudest people on planet earth, but she never holds it against you if you talk over someone or accidentally say something inappropriate, she might offer a gentle critique but she’ll also be quick to defend you if someone else has a problem with it

-She absolutely loves to hear you ramble, and how bizarre your train of thought can be, it makes her wish her power was reading minds so she could explore yours

Jayme Hargreeves

-Honestly if anyone else were as energetic and inattentive as you are that would really grate on Jayme, but luckily she loves you so she only finds it charming, not that she’s above poking fun at you for it

-Being the silent type she doesn’t mind how talkative you are, it balances out, granted it certainly helps that you’re one of the few people in the world she deems worth listening to

-She’s not usually one to volunteer her time for others, but understanding the added difficulty your ADHD causes you she always offers to help you with things like paperwork, cleaning and the like

-If anyone ever gives you crap in front of her it’s there funeral, if someone as unsociable and irritable as Jayme can appreciate you, they have no excuse not to in her eyes

[saintsenara]

SORRY I KNOW ITS WEIRD ASKING A HP TUMBLR BLOG FOR LIFE ADVICE BUT IM SO CURIOUS HOW DO YOU MANAGE YOUR TIME

this is a genuine answer.

i think it's very important for there to be no doubt about the fact that - without medication - i would be fucked. there are plenty of non-medical ways of helping to manage adhd, but stimulant medication is the frontline treatment for a reason - no matter what the latest moral panic says. you cannot girlboss your way out of having an incurable neurological condition - and i will be honest that the few people in my life who think that you can are also the few people in my life i consider to be actively contemptible.

time management starts and ends with easily having executive function - and "easily" is the operative word. i can - of course - survive without medication - but i do so while stalked by a constant state of nervous energy which is just exhausting. not least because it ruins my sleep.

[the experience of realising that - no - you're not semi-nocturnal, you've just never before been properly calm the first time you take your pills... exquisite.]

and when i'm in the state of relative normality that legal amphetamine use brings, i manage my time by...

1. wearing a watch

no checking the time on my phone - i'll just get distracted by scrolling.

2. setting huge numbers of alarms

beat time-blindness with this one weird trick.

bonus points - if you're someone who finds it hard to switch between tasks or gets stuck hyper-focusing on things, then set the alarm and then put the device it's on far enough away from you that you have to move in order to turn it off.

3. putting everything on the wall

if you are dopamine-challenged, the best tip i can give you is that you are deluding yourself if you think you can use normal diaries/planners/to-do lists. this is why you probably have cupboards full of them.

stick everything on the wall, where you can see it, and set it up in a way that you can easily move tasks around [i.e. by using a whiteboard you can erase, or sticking your planner inside a plastic wallet and writing on it, or by having everything on sticky notes you can move around].

numbered task lists [i have to do x first, then move onto y] are a no-go - because if you don't do x, then you won't move onto y. but having groups of tasks - organised by urgency or difficulty, for example - which are right there in front of you can be selected from work much better with the adhd brain.

4. being a shark

by which i mean, being constantly on the move. desk chairs are the enemy. never sit still.

if you have adhd - and, to be frank, even if you don't - you will find that doing something physical while you need to concentrate on a task improves your ability to focus on that task. it also helps with managing time-blindness, task-switching, hyper-focus which is to the detriment of what you're supposed to be doing, and being easily distracted.

when i'm at work i literally never sit down. i use a standing desk [which, if you have a diagnosis of adhd and you're uk-based, counts as a reasonable adjustment your employer has to provide for you, fyi], and i have an under-desk treadmill [which i had to pay for myself, which i do not regret in the slightest] for tasks which really need a lot of effort to power through.

at home, i have an adjustable desk which i use as a standing desk or which i sit at while using an under-desk bike [which i use when i'm likely to get stuck hyper-focusing on something and need not to be - like if i'm writing fic but i need to meet up with friends at a certain time - because it's really uncomfortable and it therefore compels me to get up] or an exercise ball [the effort of not falling off really helps with concentration].

obviously, these types of movement are possible for me because i'm not physically disabled - it will look different for everyone, but any level of physical movement [including using fidget toys] helps with time management by improving focus.

5. body-doubling

this is a classic adhd-and-productivity thing, which means having someone physically with you while you work. they're not there to supervise you [or indeed to engage with you at all] - they're working on their own things - but the way that the adhd brain is primed for pattern recognition [and is very good at mimicry] means that you end up falling into the same rhythm as the other person.

if you need to complete something in a finite amount of time, then having someone you can body-double with is really useful, because you're less likely to get distracted from or overwhelmed by the task at hand. similarly, having a double helps prevent you getting stuck hyper-focusing.

6. owning my shit

everyone - even the most neurotypical of people - is late, or misses deadlines, or forgets meetings, or puts off tasks sometimes. it will happen no matter how brilliant your organisational system is. it's part of life.

but if you have adhd, it's very easy to fall into "well, this is just what i'm like" thinking - both self-critically ["i can't improve this, i'm a fuck-up"] and self-indulgently ["he has no right to be angry at me for being late for his party, he knows i have adhd"].

untrue. if you struggle with time management you have a responsibility to get a grip on aspects of those struggles which inconvenience other people. you will have to be quite strict with yourself in order to do this - i've ended up in a position, for example, where i'm always extremely [and often inconveniently - i do a lot of lurking outside the function waiting until it's time to go in] early for things. this is because i know that if i give myself an inch ["oh, i can wait fifteen minutes before leaving, it'll be fine!"] then i'll take a mile ["fuck, i should have left half an hour ago"].

so too with tasks. that "you can do this later... just go on your phone for a bit" voice is the devil speaking. do not listen.

i'm afraid that i've not found this becoming more intuitive with time - i have to be constantly strict with myself, in a way that neurotypical people don't - but it's just the way it is, you just have to do your best.

be community-minded about the things you need to do, be proactive in identifying what your weak areas are and thinking about how you can get around them [as i've said, mine is being late, and so i'm always hyper-alert about not slipping into complacency around this] forgive yourself for the odd slip, say sorry without caveats to people you inconvenience, thank people who are gracious, and extend grace in turn.

7. taking every bit of help going

i'm open about my diagnosis at work - which is a piece of good fortune which isn't available to everyone.

[although, if you're uk-based, a diagnosis of adhd counts as a disability under the equality act - your employer is obligated to make reasonable adjustments for you, you can't be dismissed just for having adhd, and you are entitled to bring a claim of disability discrimination if you are not provided with reasonable adjustments. you are also entitled to apply for an access to work grant - which provides financial assistance for adjustments which fall outside of the reasonable costs your employer is legally obliged to incur.]

i have adjustments at work [not only my standing desk, but things like permission to record meetings and to have all instructions issued in writing] and i feel absolutely no shame over it. if i can get something for free from the government to make my life easier, i will take it.

i am also absolutely shameless about taking advantage of my colleagues to help with time management - using them as body doubles, or asking them to get me from my office so i'm not late to things, for example - and i take advantage of my friends and family along the same lines.

human beings are social creatures - this is literally what we're designed to do - and it's incredibly important to reject the "i owe nobody anything" paradigm [which is one of the most egregious crimes of modern, poorly-regulated therapy]. i receive support, and i repay it turn by doing things for the people who help me.

8. constantly having a little treat

i am a grown adult with three degrees and a mortgage. i have also been known to use a star chart for a little flutter of pride in myself.

if you have a time management triumph, give yourself a little treat. you deserve it.