#but it also meant he had no reason to reach out now that their paths had diverged so much

[layzeal]

wei wuxian opening up to lan wangji at the foot of the burial mounds about why he can't simply stop cultivating the ghost path was his cat equivalent of rolling on his back and exposing his stomach while trusting lwj would not touch it

[wongyuuu]

high for this | csc/kmg

pairing: seungcheol x f!reader x mingyu genre: smut word count: 4.3k warnings: minors do not interact, threesome, dirty talking, swearing, petnames, oral, multiple orgasm, forced orgasm, unprotected sex (don't do this), boob play, kind of intense, little bit of degradation, anal (?) a/n: this happened... i blame @ressonancee, she made me do it, also thank u to @ssinboo too for helping me, both of you 💕 this is my last fic of the year, so why not make it the wildest thing i've ever written? lower case was intencional. read it through once, probably needs a lot of editing

"is there anything you want to try?" 

you looked up from your toenails to find your boyfriend's strong gaze on you. it was a sunday night much like any other sunday, you were watching a movie together while you painted your nails. much to your dislike, that week you had an appointment with a nail stylist but she had to cancel last minute so it was up to you to do your own nails. you liked doing it by yourself, but only your hands. 

"hm" you looked at the bright numbers on your phone. it was just past eight, around time for dinner "i feel like pizza, you?"

seungcheol nodded and reached for his phone, texting the place you usually ordered from, mindlessly typing away on his phone. 

"that was not really the question though," he said looking at you "i asked if there's anything you'd like to try"

you cocked your head to the side, not sure what he meant but since you were talking about food just a second before, you figured that it was still the topic. the movie too was about a waitress turned chef, so it seemed like a natural path of conversation. 

"i don't know, all the places i want to try don't deliver and i don't feel like going out" you murmured. 

your boyfriend laughed, his hand tracing random circles around your ankle. 

"in sex, babe. something you want to try while we have sex"

if life was like a cartoon or an animation, you were certain that there was probably going to be a question mark over your head. you thought that there was nothing wrong with your sex life, if anything it was great. 

thorughout the three and a half years you and seungcheol had been together, sex had never been boring or dull. if anything it was always exciting. you had always been eager to try different things and fulfill most, if not all, of each other's fantasies. 

so his question, though not really surprising, was somewhat unexpected. 

"not that i can think of right now, why?"

he chuckled, turning his eyes back to his phone, and quickly typing your order. he didn't need to ask what kind of pizza you wanted, it was always the same order. you were sure that when the workers saw his name they didn't need to read the order in full. 

"because i think there’s something you've always wanted to try and never told me"

you started to shake your head but stopped midway, narrowing your eyes at him. 

"how do you know?"

he turned around, now completely facing you on the bed, and pulled your feet up on his leg. many times before seungcheol had painted your nails for you, the reasons usually varied a lot, but you knew that this time he was trying to get you to confess to him. 

he would have to work a little harder for that.

"baby, i know what ticks you. you can try to hide it all you want, but in the end, you're not the innocent girl everyone thinks you are"

you bit your lip, thinking just how far you could talk. there was only one fantasy that you were yet to complete and though he was your boyfriend and judgment from him was usually very low, if it even happened at all, you weren't sure if the one you kept a secret was one he would like to hear, much less make it happen for you.

the truth was that seungcheol was more on the jealous side of the spectrum of the boyfriends you had in your life. he was, undoubtedly, number one on that list. so, perhaps, telling him that you would like to partake in a threesome would not be the best idea.

"i don't know if i should tell you about it"

seungcheol's eyes were focused on the brush running over your nail but you didn't miss the way he ran his tongue over his inner cheek.

"if you don't say it out loud, i'm not going to make it happen"

you analyzed him for a second, narrowed eyes at the way he looked so nonchalant about it. he looked too calm with the idea. familiar with the thought already. 

"you've done it before!" you said, mouth agape, sort of laughing, shaking his arm "when? with who? you and two girls, or you, a guy and a girl? oh, oh oh! you and other two guys?"

of course that was it. of course, that was why he was so chill about it. 

"i'm going to mess up your nails," he said without raising his eyes, a hint of entertainment in his voice.

"who cares about my nails? i want the stories"

seungcheol said that he knew what made you tick but you also knew how to get him to do the things you wanted. you patted his hands away from your feet and climbed on his lap, making sure to stretch your legs behind him so you wouldn't mess up your nails, which would make seungcheol pout like a child. 

"tell me," you asked, in your sweetest voice, poking at his dimples that decided to make an appearance.

he set his hands around your waist, a grin on his face when he pushed his hand under your shirt - his shirt actually - so he could touch your skin. 

"me, a guy and a girl"

you sighed and kissed him. the image of him, you and someone else crept up in your mind again, and slouched over him again.

"i'll let you pick whoever you..."

"mingyu" you said even before he could finish his sentence. 

he pinched your waist, pouting.

"you could at least pretend to think about it"

you had thought about it, more times than you were willing to admit. out of all the people you knew, mingyu was the only one who ever crossed your mind. 

"i'll make it happen" 

you sat in the middle of the bed, expectantly looking from seungcheol, who stood close to door, to mingyu, who anxiously shifted his weight from a foot the other on side of the room.

after seungcheol said that he was going to make it happen, he never mentioned the situation again. and although it had been fun to tease him that day, you didn't want to push your luck with him. 

it took him a couple of weeks to say anything at all and then he suddenly just said "mingyu will come by tomorrow"

no dinner, no wine, beer, or talk. it was just an announcement and then the three of you were in the same room, expectantly looking at each other.

"you should kiss her, get her in the mood," seungcheol said to mingyu "this was something she wanted to try, but i think she got a little shy now that you're here"

mingyu adverted his eyes from seungcheol and finally set them on you again, trying to make sure that it was really okay to touch you. when all you did was blink at him, he hesitated.

"do you actually want this?" he asked, looking over at seungcheol who smiled while leaning against the door, arms crossed over his chest.

your silence didn't come from cold feet or suddenly having second thoughts, it was more because you felt hot all over. neither of them had even touched you yet but just the fact that both of them were in the same room with you and you knew what was about to happen. your mind had sort of stopped functioning the moment you saw mingyu walk in, trailing behind seungcheol.

"dude, maybe some other time," he said to seungcheol "i don't think she wants this"

"no," you said finding your voice again, suddenly gripping his large hand "i want this, i'm just a little nervous"

mingyu didn't need to be told twice. he had gotten a green light from you and that was all he needed to move. he started with your shoulder. he placed a light kiss on your skin, brushing away your hair and the strap of your nightgown. 

you never thought that seungchel would agree to something like that and that was why you never told him about it. being with two men was one of your fantasies and while your boyfriend had worked hard to meet all of them, you were certain that there was one he would never say yes to. and yet, somehow, there you were, in the middle of your bedroom with the two hottest men you had ever laid eyes on. 

the promise of what was about to happen was more than enough to get you started. 

mingyu trailed kisses up your neck. the contrast between the delicate caress of his lips and the roughness of his hands was enough to make your legs shake a little. finally, his lips touched yours. tentatively at first, mimicking the silky touch of just a second before. when you responded to his actions, hand gripping his forearms, mingyu deepened the kiss, his tongue brushing past your lips, demanding control. 

whenever you imagined yourself in such a position, the third person never had a face. it was only you and seungcheol and someone else, a faceless man. but the second you met mingyu, months before, he became the faceless man in your fantasies. just how many times had you imagined yourself in between the two men, falling apart in their arms? 

countless had been the nights you woke up needy, after yet another dream, turning to seungcheol desperate, begging for more and more. 

just as mingyu slightly pulled back you felt seungcheol behind you, his hand on your upper thigh, dragging the fabric of your gown up. he made a pleased sound on the back of his throat when he didn't feel the usual band of underwear. you thought that there was no point in wearing one. 

“i'm going to blindfold you now” seungcheol whispered, lightly nibbling at your earlobe.

you moaned when you felt the lace being placed over your eyes at the same time mingyu kissed your chest, his thumb running over your nipple. 

seungcheol wrapped his arm around you and pulled your back flush against him, his lips sucking your skin as mingyu left airy kisses over your chest.

you had completely forfeited control at that point, even if maybe it was a little early for that. the lace covering your eyes only gave you small glimpses of the man in front of you, of his chest still covered in the white t-shirt he had on when he arrived, his tanned skin. but even if you were able to see a little, there was still so much that you didn't and that made every touch feel hotter, needier, more demanding.

you felt seungcheol taking a couple of steps back, until both of you were seated on the middle bed.

"why the blindfold?" you asked.

seungcheol pulled your weight over him, his hands pushing your gown down at the same time mingyu pushed it up, leaving all the fabric pooling around your waist.

"because you like it, because i want you to enjoy this to the fullest" his voice was low, rough, and each word that left his lips sent waves through your body, straight to your core "so enjoy it while he eats you out and then fucks you, there won't be a second chance. i won't share you again"

one of the reasons you even said yes in the first place to the idea was because mingyu was leaving town soon. he got a job in another city and it required him to move. so when seungcheol brought up you fantasy and teased you with it, agreeing and choosing mingyu had been easy. you wouldn't have to see him again any time soon, so there was no chance of you being embarrassed in front of him. by the time you saw him again, the things you allowed both of them to do to you would be a distant memory. 

"when do you fuck me?"

that was the whole point of the night, you thought, having both of them at the same, but in seungcheol's little speech, there was no mention of him. 

his chest vibrated with laughter, chuckling. 

"i will, baby, don't worry"

seungcheol snaked his arm around you waist, his fingers sliding over you until he reached your thighs. your boyfriend pushed your leg to the side, while mingyu did the exact same thing, leaving you in complete display for him. 

"if you don't like something," seungcheol said, his breath tingling your skin "if you want to stop, whatever it is. just say it, and we'll stop"

you could see it perfectly in your mind, mingyu kneeling on the floor, kissing you while looking up to see your reaction. one thing about having one of your senses taken away was the fact that everything felt magnified. so the touches weren't simple touches anymore. actions that normally would have only made you excited about the situation, suddenly made you horny. 

there was no need to touch yourself to know that you were already wet and you had only started. your muscles started to tense up in anticipation of what was to come. 

no imagination or dream could have prepared you for the reality that was mingyu. instead of playing with you a little more, something that he would definitely enjoy doing, mingyu placed three small breathy kisses on your pelvis before his lips finally found your center.

his tongue was one of a man who knew what he was doing.

it started with a tickle, a flutter of a touch and then it was all too consuming. 

you moaned when he wrapped his arms around your legs and pulled you closer to him. the sounds were all loud, wet, and dirty, and somehow you felt hotter with each passing second. 

"more" you begged. 

he flicked your clit once, then twice, before pulling it into his mouth, sucking hard like it was a goddamned lollipop. he kept going until you became a begging mess in front of him, your hand found its way to his hair and pressed him harder over you. 

seungcheol let out a hum of approval from behind you, finally placing his hands on you. he pinched your nipples, tugging at them harshly only increasing your pleasure, all the while mingyu blew and lightly bit on your clit. 

it felt like being worshiped by the two men. two sets of hands all over your body whose only purpose was to pleasure you. 

mingyu slid a finger inside of you, without warning, making you arch and seungcheol tighten his grip around your waist.

"she's so loud," mingyu said, pleased. 

seungcheol laughed again, kissing your neck. he wrapped his hand around your neck, forcing your head back. your moan was swallowed by his hungry lips.

"add another finger, she'll get even louder"

you felt mingyu’s devilish smile, before he did exactly what seungcheol said. the stretch was simply perfect. he curled his fingers just the right way, pushing them all the way in before almost pulling out, while his tongue paid full attention to your clit. there was no stopping the moans that escaped your lips, loud and needy. the combination of mingyu's agile tongue and seungcheol’s skilled hands was enough to drive you crazy.

“it’s okay baby,” seungcheol whispered, pinching your nipples relentlessly “you can cum on his fingers”

his words were enough to drive you over the edge. your grip on mingyu’s hair tightened, your free hand searching for seungcheol’s thigh. mingyu held you closer when your head started to spin, your legs shaking, licking you as if you were an ice cream he couldn’t get enough of. he flattened his tongue, licking you in one big motion, his fingers moving faster. all of it almost too much but you catch yourself begging:

“ah… don’t stop… please” 

you were arching, pleading, demanding and you didn’t care. never before had you felt like that and you knew it was only the beginning. 

suddenly mingyu’s hands and lips were gone, but just for a second. he crawled over your body. you touched the lace covering your eyes, wanting to push it away, needing to see both men, but your boyfriend stopped you, pushing your hands away. 

“the fold stays on” he said and suddenly his voice became a distant sound, muffled by the weight of mingyu over you, his lips demanding your attention.

you could taste your release on him, and you couldn’t help but moan a little at the feel of his naked chest over yours. somewhere along the way he had taken his shirt off. the bulge in his sweats giving you the tiniest bit of friction but not nearly enough.

you wanted to see seungcheol's face, wanted to study and memorize every tiny expression on his face. wanted to see if his eyes darkened like they usually did when he was aroused, if the moment was also pleasurable for him, or if he was doing all of it because it was something you wanted.

“but i want to see you”

seungcheol was a hands-on kind of boyfriend, not in a suffocating kind of way, but in a way that made you feel cherished. his hands were always on you. if you were both in the same room there was no way he was going to stay away. 

one of your friends decided to have her bachelorette in the same club her fiancé was having his bachelor's party, to which seungcheol had been invited to. though the night started as expected, somewhere around 2 am you found your boyfriend sitting by your side when you had gotten too tired to keep dancing with the other girls.

if he was driving, his hand was on your leg or holding onto yours; if you were walking down the street, his arm was around your shoulders. he was always all over you.

“get on your knees,” he said.

there was no need for you to make a single movement when mingyu turned you around and dropped you on the bed like you were some kind of ragged doll. laughing might not have been the best reaction but it was the only one you had to give.

“you wanna her first?” mingyu asked.

“you can have her”

something about the way they talked, as if you had no say and were there only for their entertainment, turned on you even further. 

the sound of plastic being torn was the only one in the room, as well as your small pants, while you still tried to catch your breath. you desperately wanted to remove the blindfold. for whatever reason, you enjoyed the sight of a man rolling up a condom. maybe you liked that it helped build anticipation or maybe you just liked knowing what was in store for you.

even so, you put your ass as high up as you possibly could, your knees apart. 

“i guess she's excited” mingyu said, his tone cocky as he ran his hand over your ass “nice and slow, or hard and fast?”

mingyu pressed the tip of his fingers to your cunt, moving them up and down a couple of times, getting his fingers wet, and then running them over his dick. not that he needed it, he knew that he could just slide in without effort, but he enjoyed seeing you tremble on fingers one more time.

he aligned his tip with your entrance, rubbing himself on you a couple of times but stilled a second later, waiting for your answer. 

"in, would be great"

he laughed, slowly pushing inside. you were a little sensitive but that only heightened the feeling. your breath hitched as he finally sank into you. you held onto the sheets, hands balled into fists, squirming, urging him to just fucking move. he wasn't as thick as seungcheol but he was long, touching you somewhere that you were yet to be touched by anyone before. 

suddenly you felt seungcheol's cock against your lips, his thumb forcing them open. he thrust himself in, hitting the back of your throat just as mingyu started to move. 

their paces were completely different, while mingyu pushed in long, sensual strokes, seungcheol forced his hips harshly, holding your head in place until you squeezed his waist. despite being different, they somehow felt complementary to each other.

an unfamiliar sound left your lips, a weird mix of a moan and a gasp for air. your boyfriend wrapped your hair in his hand, pulling on it, forcing your head back. it should have been painful but it only made you clench around mingyu's cock.

"look at you" seungcheol chuckled a little, his fingers running across your face, further turning you into a mess of tears and spit "taking two cocks at the same time"

you moaned when he pushed himself into your mouth again, at the same time mingyu started to move faster, his index fingers circling your hole. 

"wouldn't you just love it if he pushed his finger in a little" seungcheol taunted "all holes filled like a good little slut"

you cried, needing more of everything.

the entire situation was degrading, from your actions to his words, but you were beyond caring. all of it was just beyond anything you could have ever imagined. every sort of contact you had with a threesome before, from hearing your friends talk about it, reading it, watching it, imagining it, was nothing compared to the reality. 

"oh she loves to be called a slut" mingyu grunted "she's milking me, man, i'm not gonna last much longer"

mingyu's thrusts became frantic, almost sloppy and he lost his constant tempo. 

"in my mouth" you pulled away from seungcheol long enough to say.

to hell with seungcheol’s rules and blindfold. you turned around, whimpering at the emptiness, pulling the blindfold from your eyes and tossing it aside.

mingyu stood at the edge of the bed, one foot propped on the mattress. his large hand stocking his cock, a grin on his face while you crawled towards him. his dick right in front of your face, long, veins high, a thick layer of your juices coated him. you moaned as you pulled the condom away before you took him in your mouth.

you knew what pulling away from seungcheol would cause, in fact you were hoping for it. so when you felt his hands roughly grab your hips, you smiled. the scream that left you when he slammed into you wasn't of pain, but of pure pleasure. he moved hard and fast, leaving you no room to breathe. you cried, your nails digging into mingyu's flesh as seungcheol mercilessly fucked you. your boyfriend grunted with every thrust.

you felt mingyu’s dick twitch in your mouth, scraping him with your teeth, making him hiss. 

“i’m gonna cum in you sweet little mouth, sweetheart” he said, grabbing the hair at your scalp, forcing himself all the way in, holding himself in place, until he found his release. 

slowly he rocked his hips, his hot cum running down your throat. you sucked him dry, not a single drop left behind.

you felt a second wave of pleasure consume you and the entire world seemed like it was crashing down around you when seungcheol inserted his index inside your only empty hole, a second later his middle finger too.

“yes, cheol, fuck”

your entire body contracted, shaking in absolute, delirious, pleasure. it went through your entire body in waves, from your head to your toes.

seungcheol kept going, moving into your sensitive slit restlessly. you cried out again, feeling your orgasm build once more when you felt him fill you with his warm cum.

“that's my perfect cum slut, filled to the brim” cheol praised you

you allowed your limp body to fall on the mattress, face down, completely exhausted but feeling pleased in a way you had never before. 

but seungcheol wasn't done with you, not yet anyway. he turned you around, his hand immediately found your clit, rubbing it slowly in circles, in a way that he knew drove you crazy.

“no” you said

you tried to close your legs, holding his hand still. you were too sensitive, your body entirely too tired to keep going. seungcheol got on top of you, using his knees to keep your thighs apart.

“remember what you promised, baby?” he whispered, kissing your cheek tenderly, “you said that you would cum for me the same you came for him”

you shook your head, small tears forming on the corners of your eyes. yes, you had promised, but you couldn’t follow through with it

“i can't, it's too much”

“you can, baby” he pressed harder against your clit, adding two fingers inside of you, curling them just the right way “give me one more. just one more”

your body tensed up once again, eyes rolling to the back of your head. his words were the last straw, enough to drive you once again to the edge. a scream rippled through you, your hips bulking up from the bed hard enough that seungcheol had to hold you in place. 

you struggled to breathe again, your lungs doing a terrible job at what they were supposed to do. the situation became a little worse when seungcheol dropped his entire weight over you, pulling his digits out of you. he too breathed heavily. you ran your hand over his hair, caressing it while you slowly came back to your senses. 

"you okay?" he pushed back to look at you, pushing your hair away from your face "was it too much?"

you shook your head, smiling at him. you couldn't talk yet, body still shaking a little, sensitive all over. you were certain that you looked like a complete mess, you could feel your entire body sticky with sweat. 

seungcheol kissed your cheek again, pulling the sheets from your bed over you. you left knowing what he was doing.

"dude, i've seen it all. in fact, i did a little more than just look at it" 

“keep talking and your eyes will magically disappear”

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[hidden-snow]

✦┈⋆┈ ⋞ 〈 Ｒｕｎｎｉｎｇ Ｈｏｍｅ ｔｏ Ｙｏｕ 〉 ⋟ ┈⋆┈✦

Summary // You thought your relationship was as special to him as it was to you. You thought he loved and cherished you as much as you loved and cherished him. But when his family leaves the Omatikaya and all he has to offer is ‘I’m sorry’ when you beg and plead for him to stay with you, you realize that you were so, so wrong about him. Heartbroken and defeated, a girl barely seventeen years old, you decide that you will never love again. After all, it hadn’t meant anything to him. Years later and you are the best of the best. A strong warrior and an even better hunter, you provide for your people in every way except for a child to add to the next generation of Omatikaya people. They respect your wishes but you can hear the whispers. You can feel the concerned gazes from your parents, too old to conceive a sibling to make up for your lack of children. When he comes back, it throws you through a loop. Handsome, mighty, and different, he comes to you right away. But you promised yourself.

Warnings // Angst, a bit of stalker Neteyam, some fluff, mentions of drinking, heartbreak

Word count // 1,506

Part 1 / Part 2 / Part 3 / Part 4 / Part 5 / Part 6 / Part 7

He was everywhere.

When you were supposed to be training the younger hunters, when you were telling stories to the children, when you were eating meals with the rest of the clan.

No matter where you were, you could count on him being nearby, keeping an eye on you as if you were his and only his.

You couldn’t help but roll your eyes at the thought, mainly because you knew that, no matter what, you would never belong to anyone. Especially not to him.

Though… in a way, it was also kind of sweet that he cared so much about who you were around. Annoying as it was, he was very eager to show that he still cared about you despite all these years of separation.

No matter what, though, you were determined to not allow him to get into your head again. Not this time. Not ever again.

Gritting your fists, you set yourself into the mindspace of the task you had to do now; some one on one training with a young student who was currently a bit farther behind than the others.

Walking along the trodden dirt path, you came to a clearing surrounded by thickly growing plants, trees towering over you as if reaching to the blue hued sky above. You draw in a slow breath, letting it out slowly as you wait for your student to show up, bow resting against your back.

“I hope you don’t mind. I convinced Ìtseì to let me have this training session with you. I could use some practice with you.”

Exasperated, you turn to level Neteyam with your best, coldest glare, only to find that he was unfazed by your hostility. He simply smirked back at you, raising an eyebrow as he pulled his bow from behind his back.

“Are you sure you still know how to use a bow? After all that time, swimming with the reef people… it probably left you extremely rusty.”

“Ah, there’s that spitfire I’ve been waiting for,” Neteyam responded, notching one of his feathered arrows. Intricately carved, delicate and deadly. Quick to pierce hearts, sharp enough to end a life in one shot.

Just like how he ended the life you’d had before.

You shake your head, regathering your thoughts to what you needed to do.

“You’re a big boy. Help yourself. Since Ìtseì did not show up, I will go and hunt by myself,” you respond, turning your back to the male, fully intent on hunting alone.

Except, he didn’t leave you alone.

You were beginning to wonder if this was a behavioral pattern that had been forged into him by his father from a young age. After all, Neteyam followed Jake around all the time as a child, ready and waiting for orders or instructions that only he could take care of.

That had to be the reason for his stalker-like behavior.

Pushing aside heavy, large leaves and small viney shrubs, you could hear him behind you, despite the fact that he was very obviously trying hard not to make a sound.

“Following me is not going to get you on my good side,” you warn softly, throwing the comment over your shoulder aggressively as you walked a bit faster.

He wasn’t discouraged, nor did he seem to be bothered by your sharp words or your dismissive behavior. In fact, it seemed to spur him on more, his footsteps speeding up so that he could catch up with you.

“Come on, Y/n. Can’t we just talk? You and I, together, like we used to do. Please.”

His fingers wrap around your wrist and you yank away, at the same time swinging your bow at him, instinctive training kicking in. He ducked down, barely missing the slash of your bow in the area where his face had been mere seconds ago.

“Do not touch me, Neteyam te Sulli Tsyeyk’itan. I am not your yawne. I am not your childhood friend. I am not your toy or your plaything. You have destroyed everything we once had. You have crumbled every bridge that sat between you and I. I want nothing to do with you.”

This time, he falters, a look of horror and shock on his face. But you aren’t really sure if that was directed towards the fact that you’d tried to hit him or the words that had just spilled from your lips.

You turn away to hide the tears that were now burning hot and fresh in your eyes, refusing to allow him the satisfaction of seeing you cry. He didn’t even deserve that.

Your feet move before you can think about it, taking you rapidly farther away from the stunned form of the boy who’d ruined your life. You were certain he’d leave you alone now. After all, he was smart, quick to understand the things people were telling him.

Or at least, he used to be.

Your ears twitch to the sound of him running to catch up once more and you sigh, rolling your eyes. Obviously, the ways of the water have dumbed down that intelligence, considering how desperate he was to ignore your stinging-sharp words and your ice-cold disposition towards him specifically.

“Y/n, stop walking.”

You don’t belong to him. You never did. So why did your feet falter in your path? Why did you hesitate to keep going, even as you turn to face him once more?

“Open up, Y/n. I’m back. I’m here. I’m here and I want to talk to you. I want to fix what I broke before. Please, let me explain myself to you.”

There’s a hint of desperation in that smooth tone of his, a soft drop of pleading that didn’t belong to the body that spoke the words. He’d never been the begging type before.

You open your mouth, prepared to respond in the same way as before, when a sharp sting erupted in your cheek and you tumbled to the ground in an ungraceful heap.

Your hand slides up, cupping your sore cheek, as you stare up in shock at the male looming over you, a new expression on his face. Unreadable and hard to pick apart.

“I just want you to hear me out. Just onc- oomph!”

Before he’s finished, you’re launching yourself at him, slamming your shoulder into his abdomen and knocking him to the ground, the soft grass beneath your feet doing nothing to cushion his fall.

“You don’t deserve my attention!” you shriek, grabbing and yanking at his braids as you wrestle him in an attempt to win the little brawl. He’s fighting back, which you had to give him credit for. It wasn’t something you’d expected from him.

Rolling in the grass, disrupting plants and innocent, wandering wildlife, biting and scratching and pulling at anything you can get your hands on, you realize he’s not going to let you win easily.

And for once in your life since he left, you welcome this. Everyone else had been taking it easy on you, seeing as how you were pretty destroyed by his departure. Things had been done for you if they seemed to be too hard. Your parents had doted on you for the past three years, trying to make up the love that you’d lost.

You needed a challenge.

And he was providing it.

It was exciting, exhilarating, full of promises of a frustrated loss or an awarding victory.

You put your all into this little sparring match, putting all of your otherwise-useless training to use. When it became clear that he was doomed to lose, he still refused to fold, fighting until the very end.

When he tapped out, the sensation of a satisfactory win filled you up inside and you couldn’t help the grin that began to grow on your face.

You sat in the grass, working to catch your breaths, silence spreading out between the small clearing you’d both found yourself in.

It was nice, peaceful and calm. Like the days you’d shared as children, playing in the streams under careful adult watch or laying in the grass and staring up at the sky as his siblings ran around picking flowers and playing games.

“Please, talk to me,” he murmured after a while, breaking the soft, gentle silence that had begun to fill you with melancholy as you reminisced on the days of your childhood.

You stand slowly, dusting yourself off as he watched you, trying to come up with the right way to explain yourself.

“I can’t,” you respond, finally meeting his gaze.

“Neteyam, you cannot fix this. Not now. Possibly not ever. I’ve moved on with my life. Don’t you think it is about time that you moved on with yours as well?”

He doesn’t respond, doesn’t even bother to get up, and you grab your discarded items from the ground, not saying another word.

Yet… as you walk away, you realize with a sinking heart, that perhaps, you’d not gotten over him as much as you wanted to believe you had.

Taglist // @earthling55

[theoccultz]

Spiritual guides thats reaching out to you ?

Or is working with you in short , you can use this reading to find your guides from other realms

General reading , take what resonates leave what doesn't

Note: there was total of 6piles, i had to remove it because they didn't wanted to give a direct message meaning you'll have to figure it out so if you feel called to those numbers or is seeing 5 or 6 and you happened to stumble upon this reading then your guides are selene, leviathan and shezmu

Ignore any mistakes

This pac of mine is different and special, i didn't released it for a long time but i feel like i should now , the messages were direct and open to possibilities, its not my usual style of reading because I channeled from your guides perspective so you'll have to decode any messages , i put whatever i understood in orange ink as this reading was made a long time ago so yes .

My readings are inclusive, your comments, likes , reblogs are appreciated!! I read em all and i love it 💚

Note:Tarot should not be replaced with medical or professional advice , i'm here to provide you clarity and guidance please use your own discrement,any decision taken from your side is your responsibility thank you .

Pile l . Pile ll. Pile lll. Pile lV.

Pile l .

Baphomet

7ofcups, 8ofcups ,4ofcups, the sun x , the heirophant x,the chariot , 9of swords

I feel like in the upcoming months your workload will increase , you'll have a positive shift in your attitude, you'll be able to form new connections , be more outgoing and resilient , This is the change you invited or wished for , right now you could be feeling like things are moving slow or there's a lot of goals to complete taking up all your time and energy or you could be put in a period of relaxation but you still feel restless then you'll be out of this very very soon. Baphomet is also a knowledgeable guide .

I see a lot of new energy and new beginnings for you , you are prepared at this time , you are shedding your old skin , i see a period of abundance where you will be satisfied with where you are in your journey, baphomet is reaching out to you as a guide he wants you to focus on your work and make choices & decisions which are right for you , i feel like with all this abundance energy there will be some energy vampires , karmic soulmates or people with envious eyes who will also come into your life i feel like without baphomet you'll not be able to see the illusion that surrounds you , you'll feel as though finally things are on track or you're with right people making right choices but it'll be not the case , i highly feel that your blessings that are meant to stay for months or so will be envied , people will give you cold shoulder, you were letting go of your past and putting an end to things and it can turn upside down because there's a group which will be working in harmony to bring you down or cause little delays & troubles and this will be your own people doing it subconsciously( co-workers , family , friends) and your guide will be there to protect the work you'll be doing , he'll be working with you so you can succeed.

I feel like after a period of stillness, constant sadness , low energy , ill minded people, struggling days , humiliation, loss of power , disconnection, emptiness, overflowing emotions ,nightmares and past traumas which are haunting you for years you'll be able to let it go so this will be a big transformation you might have chiron-venus aspects or heavy chiron and mars energy , you'll need to direct your focus onto a steady path there will be new people entering your life , you need to have a better discernment as to who or what can drain your energy remember this includes romantic partners too not everyone is meant to stay in your life for good reasons , if you feel like you have people who dont appreciate you or behave rudely with you ,they will get their Karma because i feel like there's a lot built up of emotional baggage which is not yours and it will be sent back to who it belongs , i feel like channeling will help you a lot ...you can get a paper and write every single thing you encounter that wasn't pleasant and how it effected you growing up even the people who left you hurt , start with leaving the past in the past remember grieving is a natural process . Baphomet wants to help in balance your emotional state and be nurturing.

In short baphomet wants to help you reprganise your life , appreciate your studies/hobbies/work , redirect your purpose , bring a tower moment (shake things which are not build on solid ground) , cut of the distractions, reconnect with your inner self, manifest and establish new connections .

Things i heard: cleasing oil , marine , attire white silk , fan club , papers , z ? , railways (travelling) , accident, January -march-april , horror franchise, filmography, addictions , baneful magick , throat crown chakra , mandli? Lee? She's not your friend , good for nothing, energy vampires, its not your energy send it back (return to sender you can do ), ex , delivery ,black Violeta, Portuguese,spanish , libra 5-6th house , mars , scorpio energy , check sextiles, visit a planetarium, IGi o or ig ? Lamps , water ,panther, fosh , narration, a ? Soup , driver , dream , sani ? , cat , m ? , virgo placements, rally , lgbt friends or someone who's of same gender likes you romantically .

Pile ll.

Beleth hazel

The heirophant x , the sun x , five of wands , 6of wands, 8ofwands.

For manifestation i feel like he is very good in whatever abilities he posses he has taught multiple generations , he's very good with regulation of emotions , he really wants you to have a favourable outcome in whatever you're interested in or whoever you are interested in , i feel like he's specifically reaching out to you to make you aware of something or to teach you something like he wants to revive your reputation i feel like in the past and even today he was the magician , people would come to him with health issues , family issues and he would make a healing potion for them . yeah he's very sweet yet a little stern .

If you have talents or goals set for long term he wants to help you reach them ,you wont be confused or overwhelmed his guidance is smooth and doesn't take much effort for an individual to be adaptive. There's this energy of putting yourself on the top and creating a life for yourself here , i think he acknowledges you put in great effort for work , studies and helping others and now he wants to help you progress efficiently with your abilities. There's something about establishment of ideal sense be it regarding your personality or your fashion . Fashion is also many people are interested in or follows its also a form of creativity.you might be a fire or an earth sign with significant jupiter influence. Health issues seem very significant ,it could be acute stress you are experiencing.

In short he wants you to have confidence in the person you are , he wants you to put in great efforts in putting yourself out there , he wants you to shine amd let go of things , he wants to establish a reputation for you , he wants you to work with him because you share similiar traits and anilities , he reminds me of a photographer he bring the best in people and he knows what he's doing.

Higher level studies , stress , pluto9h , serial , repetition numbers: 333,1515 ,999,phonines, cut off , intense, pressure , bar , the weeknds, playing with fire , distressful people, closed off , forced. ,value traditions , atheists , red ,5 ,1 , science , demanding boss, Saturday Tuesday? 18 , 21.

Pile lll.

Barren samedi

The emperess x,justice , knight of swords , king of wands x , ten of cups eight of wands .

Barren samedia is already actively involved in your life and he has a message (channelled)

Okay you guys might be going through a crucial stage in your life or will be going through it soon i feel like its not a hard one but it'll make sure to remind you of your core strength. After this transformation you'll have a transformation , you'll push yourself you might be going out more , doing what interests you , meeting other people and even creating something in the public eye , in short youll be greatly recognised and appreciated by those around you .

There's something with communication and connections , i'm seeing old energy will be left behind it wont be retrived you'll have to leave a space which doesn't concern you anymore or people, i'm seeing someone turn 18 and moving out of the house by their own ..an independent step is always yours and you'll have to execute it NO ONE will do it for you so if you wanna have new beginnings you must take the first step . There's something about time management and saving your time? barren samedia is making more space for things to get aligned . You'll have to be honest with yourself if you feel like something's blocking you find out that blockage and work on it you are not a little kid anymore who's threatened by these issues . Learn to take your own responsibility but also be open to others and their energy not everyone is out to get you . The reason empress energy is reversed is you still have not utilised your best potential expect things to stabilise by the next full moon which is on 25th march for those who are reading in this month , it'll be an eventful one . And pls stop reacting to stupid criticism and dont be defensive you lose many opportunities.

In short , he's direct and wants you to step up and ask fir the things which are your right , dont stay stuck in not wanting bigger things , let go of old beliefs , start chanelling , ask what you want from your universe , foght your insecurities , he wants to prepare you for bigger and better things so you dont fall into the same ground which people want you to stay in , he wants you to be angry and wake up , he wants you to redirect your anger onto right things , get what you ask is his message.

Uranus 6h , saggitarius, martha , kenzas city , maribe , headache , lost of loved one's, cera ve? , k , hijacked movie , maroon5.

Pile lV.

Pazuzu fazuzu

The empress x, strength x , page of swords

I feel like there's a person in your life who's immature and rude they dont respect your boundaries and are constantly disrupting your life, you must be experiencing a period of stillness and loneliness because of them this could be a friend , family ,a partner or a lover who's not ready to sacrifice they are taking you for granted and isn't being appreciative of you .

They are hindering your growth and is constantly draining you , you could be feelin' sleepy , unmotivated and must be experiencing moodiness irritatible behaviours. Fazuzu wants to teach them a lesson they hate these kind of people who just take from others and doesn't value others as they should be valued . They lack a better judgement and is bitter , this could be very subliminally done as well like they could be hot and cold with you their actions are inconsistent and they're wanting to take your time more than you're ready to give them . Pazuzu is a fierce protector and can bring great happiness to one's life , he can encourage you he's Courages and help you regain control . You are advised to leave people and situation that doesn't serve you anymore as you'll keep repeating cycles which are only gonna put you in constant worry .

Idk that character from the police story juntao is very significant here you could be going through similiar situation or there could be a message in the film as well , i feel so . You could be seeing cats a lot and this is a sign.

In short , he wants to put things in order , whats not meant to be yours will be taken , you'll be provided with a period of healing , others will get their karma , you'll be working on your crown chakra .

Restaurant ,road trip , metal music , comeback , sick , latino , birthday , cool, your name , pisces moon , aries sun , sag placements , private show , job application, nausea , river side , blue red bag , pocket money ,purple , fix damage , fuzzy day ,

Thank you for reading!! Have a great day ahead .

[lowkeychenle]

the 1 [NJM] (M)

Description: Six years ago, you decided to move away to a different country to go to school. The catch? You had to leave Jaemin behind, and you refused to drag him along. Now you're back and, for some reason, he doesn't quite seem to hate you in the way you thought he would.

(this is inspired by the Taylor Swift song by the same name, listen to it here)

Genre: Fluff/Smut/Angst TRIPLE THREAT (?? am i okay)

Content Warnings: Explicit sex, break ups, the angst isn't too bad I don't think. Just break up stuff l o l (also don't judge any typos or repetitions I didn't edit this because I wrote this whole thing today someone save me from myself) (also also I am totally working on all requests still, I just get random inspo sometimes and when it hits, it hits)

Word Count: 10,012 (yoo for why did I make this so long help)

Pairing: Na Jaemin x Reader (this is a non-canon AU, Jaemin is a lil businessman and the rest of Dream make appearances here. PS, Best Friend!Donghyuck y'all)

Juliet's Masterlist

Honestly, you never thought you’d make your way back to Seoul. Not when you didn’t have much to come back to. Leaving for college was the scariest decision you’d ever made, but you’re so much better off for it. The experience of living in another country—even if it just for school—is the best thing you’ve ever done.

But Seoul is home. Home is where the heart is, and yours has always resided here, even long after you left. You wonder about the friends you left behind, knowing you haven’t been the best at keeping up with them.

You especially think of Jaemin. The two of you were both twenty-two when you left and, at the time, you would’ve said you were in love with him. You’d been dating for a year before you made your decision.

You don’t think of him in a way that you still have feelings for him, but rather, you want the best for him. If anything, you want to know he’s been as successful as you after you walked away from him.

“America?” Jaemin raises his eyebrows, recoiling at the thought. “I mean, that’s a great opportunity, but wouldn’t it be hard?”

“Of course, it’ll be hard. I think I need to do this before it’s too late for me.” You look down at your hands to avoid eye contact with him. The last thing you want to do is break his heart. Hell, you’ll be breaking your own, too. But being in love with Jaemin doesn’t mean you have to stop everything going on in your life to make sure you keep him.

“How long?” he asks.

“The standard degree path is four years over there, but it could take longer.”

He pauses, gulping. “Wow. You’ll be gone for four years?”

“Yeah.” You pick at your nails and clear your throat. “This is…This is a once in a lifetime opportunity, Jaem. I can’t miss it.”

“I know. I wouldn’t want you to. Um, I guess I’m just nervous as to what that means for us.”

“I love you.” You reach for his hand, intertwining your fingers. “I love you so much, but I can’t ask you to wait for me for four years. Or longer.”

“It’s not like we won’t talk. We have calls, FaceTime, we have everything. However long you need, we’ll work it out.” He tilts his head. At your hesitation, worry spreads across his face.

“I…I don’t know if I’ll come back at all, is what I mean.” You finally meet his gaze and watch the shock course through him.

“Okay, then I’ll move there, too,” he replies, as if it were simple. His forehead wrinkles as he frowns. “If that’s what you want, I can do that. We’ve only been together a year, (Y/N), that’s not long enough for me. I need forever. I promised you forever and I meant it.”

“I won’t ask you to do that.” You shake your head, feeling your eyes well with tears. “Your family’s here. Your friends. We both know you wouldn’t want to move away from your mom forever.”

Jaemin lets out a short breath, tugging his hand away from yours and running it through his hair. “So that’s it? There’s no way I can convince you?”

“You deserve someone who wants the same things you do. The same life. If I can’t give that to you, someone else will. I love you, but sometimes, love isn’t always enough if we’re being pulled in different directions.”

“I won’t just forget about you. You’re just going to disappear?” He wipes away a tear, rolling his eyes.

“You don’t have to forget about me. I’m not forgetting about you. I just need to do something for myself, and I can’t force you along with me.”

The barista jolts you from your trance, asking you if there’s something she can help you with. You clear your throat, hoping you’ll be able to talk past the lump in your throat. After ordering your favorite coffee, you stand off to the side to wait for it.

The door dings behind you, but you think nothing of it. You continue about your business, checking your phone for the time and waiting for your drink. A message comes through from your friend Donghyuck asking if you’d gotten everything settled already.

You and Jaemin had the same friend group. That’s how you met, actually. Donghyuck brought you over to one of their group hang outs, and you and Jaemin clung to each other like glue. It was inevitable that you two would end up dating, and when you did, literally not one of them were surprised.

You send him a quick message back saying everything’s good, and then the barista calls your name. Smiling at her, you walk up to grab the steaming hot cup. Nearly groaning to yourself about how good it smells, you turn around to walk toward the door.

That’s when you see him.

Jaemin.

You haven’t seen him in years. Sure, you still had each other on social media, but you never went out of your way to look at him. Five years has done him well and, at first, you’re unsure if you should say anything. He’s staring right at you, but it doesn’t feel like an invitation. It feels weird.

He’s clearly not the same Jaemin he was, but he’s Jaemin.

And right when you think he’s going to storm off in the other direction and want nothing to do with you, he smiles widely and approaches you. His smile is as gorgeous as it was before, maybe even more so. Normally, this would do little to bother you. You two ended on somewhat good terms, so there’s no reason for either of you to be holding a grudge all this time later.

He wears black pants with a pale pink button-down tucked into them. There isn’t another word to describe him other than divine. He looks good. 

With his hands buried in his pockets, he makes his way over. “I thought that was you.”

“Yeah, it’s me.” You laugh shortly, surprised that you don’t feel too awkward now that he’s in front of you. “Wow, how long has it been?”

As if you don’t know.

“Five years?” he says it like a question. “It hasn’t been that long since we’ve talked though. I guess things are just hard with time zones, aren’t they?”

You give an exaggerated nod. “Totally get that. Well, how have you been?”

“Busy.” He snorts, widening his eyes. “Busy like you wouldn’t believe. Did you end up getting your degree over there? Have you been to see Donghyuck yet?”

“I got the very expensive piece of paper, yes. And I haven’t seen him yet, no. I got back two days ago and have been trying to get things settled before I take a break.” You sip your coffee, almost sighing at the taste of vanilla on your tongue.

“I’m proud of you.” He purses his lips. “Not sure if that means much, but I am. I’m glad it worked out the way you wanted.”

“Thank you. It means a lot, especially from you. What did you decide to do here?” you ask him, tilting your head a bit.

“I’m surprised you didn’t hear,” Jaemin says. “Renjun, Chenle, Jeno, and I opened a business a couple years back. We’ve been doing pretty well, but it doesn’t really leave us with much time for anything else.”

“Holy shit, Jaem, that’s awesome.” You can’t help but grin at him. “I always knew you guys were destined for great things.”

You think back to when you’d hang out with all of them—Jaemin, Mark, Renjun, Jeno, Donghyuck, Chenle, and Jisung. Every Saturday night, you’d all get together for drinks at someone’s house, a constant rotation of happiness, friendship, and pure adoration. You love all of them, albeit in different ways, you feel a strong connection to them all. Being without them for so long has certainly made you nostalgic, but you’re sure you’ll at least see some of them now that you’re back.

You’re not sure if Jaemin will ever be comfortable hanging out with you. Neither of you were particularly bitter in your breakup, but it wasn’t mutual. You didn’t even want it, and he certainly didn’t either. But Jaemin has always been understanding—almost to a fault. He would never ask you to do something if it was against what you wanted to do.

“You know.” He pauses, running his tongue over his teeth. “Are you busy? I’m on my lunch, so if you want to catch up a little, I have the time.”

You hesitate, unsure if it’s a good idea. Before you and Jaemin dated, he was an excellent friend, too. Your only worry at this point is if things will be awkward between the two of you, but it doesn’t seem to be that way yet.

“Yeah, actually.” You take another sip of your coffee, cradling your jacket over your arm to your chest.

He gives you another dazzling smile and gestures over to a small table by the window. “After you.”

You sit down, shrugging your purse from your shoulder and hanging it from the back of the chair. He follows your lead, black hair falling like a curtain over his forehead as he leans forward to bring the seat closer. An odd urge to brush it away overtakes you, but you grab your coffee instead.

Your past with Jaemin is long gone. He’s definitely moved on to bigger, better things, and so have you. Your time in America wasn’t wasted, and you knew from Donghyuck the moment Jaemin moved on from you. It didn’t hurt the way you thought it would. You wanted him happy and cared for, and if you couldn’t do it, you hoped and prayed someone else would.

That was three years ago, but Donghyuck never talked about Jaemin to you again, unless it was something small that happened in a group setting. At that point, you’d also moved on, so as long as he was alive and thriving, you didn’t need to hear about it. Everything was okay.

You’ll always hold an unmatched adoration for the man sitting in front of you. He was your first real love, but everyone knows not everything in your early twenties lasts. It’s true what they say—that you never truly forget your first love. That, and how once you love someone, you’ll always hold some sort of affection for them in your heart.

You tell Jaemin of all the things you got to do in America, and he listens intently. In turn, he tells you about his business and how they grew it from the ground up. It’s one of the largest companies in South Korea, and your heart warms with pride.

Everything you did makes sense. You did it for a good reason. If he had dropped everything and come with you to America, he wouldn’t be doing what he loves. Eventually, you were sure he would’ve grown to resent you if he had gone.

Before you know it, the two of you have been talking for well over an hour. Your coffee is gone, the small bit left at the bottom chilled. On a whim, he checks his watch and recoils in shock.

“Oh shit,” he murmurs. “I’m sorry, I didn’t even realize how long we’d been here.”

“It’s no big deal,” you reply, waving him off. “I’ll get going though.”

“Actually…So the guys and I still do Saturday nights. If you want to come this Saturday, it’s at my place. If you want, I can text you the address.” He taps his fingers on the table.

“Yeah, that sounds like a lot of fun. It’ll be nice to see everyone. I did get a new number though, so let me give it to you.” You reach into your purse for your phone so you can find it. Since you had to switch plans when you moved back, you don’t really know it yet either.

You read it off to him, and he purses his lips while he sends his address to you in a text message. Afterwards, he stands up and brushes off his pants.

“It’ll be just like old times. Jisung is finally old enough to drink, too.” Jaemin chuckles to himself before running his fingers through his hair to push it back. “I’ll see you Saturday? We start at six.”

“Absolutely. I’ll be there.” You watch as he retreats away from you, head held high as he walks out of the coffee shop. He was confident back when you dated, but he’s even more so, and for good reason. No matter what, it’s like he gets increasingly attractive as he ages.

As soon as he’s out of sight, you tap your cheeks to get the slight blush off of them. You didn’t expect to run into him like that, not so soon, but you’re glad you did. Everything happens for a reason, and you’re glad he’s okay with everyone hanging out. You’d hate to lose out on your friends because they have to pick sides.

The encounter stays heavy on your mind even until the next day when you’re supposed to meet Donghyuck for lunch. Your apartment is on the smaller side, since most of your savings was spent to get over here.

The living room is a little under furnished, but it’s nothing you won’t accumulate as time goes on. You have a soft loveseat, a TV mounted to the wall, and a small hallway off to the side that contains your kitchen and all the appliances. Your bedroom is on the left side, big enough only for your bed and a dresser.

You stand in front of the bathroom mirror, trying your best to look at least presentable. You’ve been exhausted lately. Moving countries, across the world, takes a toll on you. At least today is Thursday. You have a job interview tomorrow, and then you’ll get to see your friends on Saturday. Your heart aches for them. They were the best friends you ever had, a complete, close knit group of people who just function so well together. There wasn’t anything else in the world like it.

You go to the small sandwich shop, finding Donghyuck already sitting there waiting for you. His face lights up like a Christmas tree at the sight of you, and his chair scrapes across the floor as he hurries to get up and hug you. He squeezes you so tightly, you almost can’t breathe. You laugh anyway, returning the gesture the best you can.

“My God, I feel like I haven’t seen you in years!” he says, smiling widely. “Shit, you’re not allowed to move out of the country again.”

You roll your eyes, nudging him. “You came to visit six months ago.”

“Six months is still half a year, (Y/N). Never again.”

“Luckily for you, I do plan on staying.” You wait for him to release you before the two of you head over to the line to order.

“Every time I see you, it’s like you’ve grown up more.” Donghyuck fakes a pout, shaking his head. “Look at you, being an adult in the world.”

“Shut your mouth,” you say. “You’re only a year older than me.”

“A year is plenty of time for extra wisdom.” He crosses his arms over his chest, raising his eyebrows like his point is valid.

He orders for both of you, insisting on paying even though you’re about ready to wrestle his wallet out of his hands. It doesn’t matter if you had a billion dollars, he would still insist. That’s always what he’s been for you, your best friend. He takes care of you even when you don’t need it.

“So, when’s your interview?” he asks, accepting the cups from the person at the counter. Handing it to you, he leads you over to the fountain, filling his with Coke Zero.

“I’m glad to see some things never change.” You grin, picking your favorite drink as well. “It’s tomorrow. I’m hoping it works out, because job searching is so tiring.”

“Tell me about it. I’m sure it’ll go great. You’re multilingual and stuff. Employers love that shit.”

Before you respond, the order is ready. You two walk back to your table, conversing back and forth about random things. The conversation takes a turn, and you’re surprised when he actually brings it up.

“Jaemin said he invited you for Saturday.” Donghyuck sips his drink. “Are you going?”

You frown. “Well, yeah. I wouldn’t miss something like that. It’s been too long since I’ve seen everyone.”

“I know that. It’s not weird with you and him, though?”

“Not at all.” You chew the inside of your cheek as you contemplate. “I was worried it would be, but we caught up a little. He seems to be doing really well. If it’s not awkward for him, it won’t be for me. I’d love to be reinstated in the friend group.”

“Reinstated?” He scrunches his nose. “That implies that you were ever un-instated.”

“Is…is that a word?” You chuckle.

“I don’t know. Sounds right to me.” He shrugs, taking a large bite of his sandwich. “I did tell them you were coming back, but also that I didn’t know if you’d be comfortable with that. They all miss you. I swear, Jisung has been talking my ear off asking when we’ll all get together. He’ll be so happy you’re coming.”

Jisung has always been the baby of the group. Even as a full grown adult, you all treat him like a child. He doesn’t complain about it, and he feeds into it probably a bit more than he should. You learn Mark and Donghyuck live together, Jaemin, Chenle, and Jeno live in their own places, and Jisung and Renjun live together. You’re a bit shocked by the last pairing, but you don’t say anything about it.

“Just promise me that if it does get weird, you’ll tell me?”

“I’ll tell you. Promise.” You nod. “I don’t think it will. It was years ago, Hyuck. He moved on, I moved on, and we’re completely different people now. Neither of us are mad.”

“Good. It’ll be nice to have the family back together again.”

After lunch, Donghyuck drives you home. You thank him for the ride, and you head up to your apartment. Regardless of what you say out loud, your brain truly is whirling like crazy after your time with Jaemin.

You didn’t expect seeing him to send you for a loop like this, but you can’t help but think back to how happy you were with him. You two were…something. Maybe not perfect, but it was fun. Magnetic. Passionate. Everything you’ve tried to replicate, even though it’s impossible. No other man could ever be Jaemin.

Your mind drifts off, and you lose yourself in memories.

Saturday nights were a novelty. You sit on Chenle’s couch with Jaemin practically hung over you, the rest of the guys talking simultaneously and incredibly loudly. You didn’t mind it. In fact, you loved it. It reminded you how many people you had by your side, and how many of them were truly like you.

Jaemin kisses your temple, pausing there for a moment. It’s late, and you know he’s getting tired. Even though these are your best friends, you understand his need to wind down after a long night. You bring your wine glass up to your lips, finishing it off.

“Ready?” he asks softly.

You glance over at him and nod, smiling. “Yeah, let me go put this away.”

When you stand up, hardly anyone notices. Chenle and Jisung are basically yelling at each other about something you can’t discern. You laugh when Chenle argues with dramatic hand motions. That’s how you know it’s serious.

You’re pretty sure Renjun has Jeno in a headlock, but you go into the kitchen before you get a good look. It’s a bit quieter in here, and you take a deep breath. You place the glass gently into the sink, closing your eyes and craning your neck back in an attempt to relax. Saturday nights drain you in the best ways, and exhaustion is starting to creep in.

Before you know it, a pair of arms snake around your waist, tugging you back gently. You find yourself against Jaemin’s chest, and you instinctively lean your head on his shoulder.

“And I thought I was tired,” he mumbles, kissing your hairline. “Everything okay?”

“Yeah, I’m okay. Can I stay with you tonight?” You turn to face him, lost in the way the lights glitter in his deep brown eyes. He truly is the most beautiful man you’ve ever seen, and you don’t have to restrain yourself from reaching up to cup his cheek. His skin is so smooth beneath your touch, you want to touch it forever.

“You don’t even have to ask.” He nods. “You’re always allowed to stay with me.”

Jaemin tells the boys you’re leaving. Chenle and Jisung halt their argument to give you a hug, and even Renjun allows Jeno some breathing time so he can say goodbye, too. Jaemin’s place isn’t far from Chenle’s, so you sit in silence for the ride, sleep threatening to take over on the way.

His fingers intertwine with yours over the center console, and his thumb rubs gently on your skin. You hum in content.

“Don’t fall asleep yet,” he whispers, careful not to startle you. “We’re almost there, my love.”

You try your best to listen to him. When you finally pull into his building’s parking lot, you’re barely able to keep your eyes open.

This week had been extra long, and you weren’t sure if you’d be able to go to Chenle’s tonight in the first place. You’re glad you did, but you’d much rather be curled up with Jaemin. He unbuckles his seatbelt and gets out, striding over to your side of the car.

Opening your door, he reaches across you to take your seatbelt off. “You okay? Do you want me to carry you?”

“Carry me? Jaem, you live on the fourth floor. I’ll be fine, just help me up.” You hold your hand out to him, but he clicks his tongue and slides his hands beneath your back and knees.

“You underestimate me,” he teases you, pulling you into his chest. “I’ll get you upstairs.”

Instead of arguing, you let your head fall onto his chest and you listen to his steady heartbeat. You’ve been together for six months now, and everything has been perfect. At this point, you’re pretty sure you want to marry Jaemin. You don’t know if he feels the same way, but you know you’d be damn lucky if that’s how things go.

He’s caring. Loving. All the things you could ever ask for. Hell, he’s carrying you into his apartment building so you don’t have to walk. He’ll make breakfast in the morning like he always does when you stay the night, and he’ll brush your hair and braid it if you want.

When you finally make it up to the fourth floor (via elevator, thankfully for Jaemin), his heart is still steady in his chest, and he brings you inside his apartment easily. He immediately brings you into his bedroom, setting you on his bed.

“Want a shirt, love?” he asks, heading over to his dresser.

“Please.” Your eyes are closed as you rest on his pillow, sinking into the soft mattress as if you’re on top of a cloud.

Jaemin grabs one for you, helping you sit up so he can help you take your blouse off. He pulls it over your head, the cotton fabric settling on your skin. It smells of his laundry detergent, so you take a deep breath to appreciate it.

“Okay,” he mutters. “Lay down now.”

He guides you back down, and he finds the button on your jeans. You aide him in taking them off of you, and then he kneels on the floor next to you, eye level with you.

“I love you,” he says, brushing your hair behind your ear. “Forever. I promise.”

“Me too,” you reply, voice quiet. “Love you forever.”

With a soft smile, he leans forward to kiss your forehead. “Get some sleep, my love. I’ll be back to cuddle in a few minutes.”

You watch him walk into his bathroom, but you’re fast asleep before he comes back out.

Forever. You scoff at your ceiling. What a concept. A novelty, really. You’re not even sure if it exists at this point. If a man like Jaemin wasn’t your forever, who the hell would be? Nobody interested you enough. You don’t think you want Jaemin anymore, but you don’t want anyone else either.

A cat. That’s what you need.

You try to distract yourself with the thought of that, but it doesn’t take long for another memory to completely consume you.

“Is this okay?” he asks, chest heaving while he hovers above you as his hand rubs up and down your side. “Tell me if you’re not comfortable.”

“I love you,” you tell him easily, as if the words are second-nature when they come to him. “I’m ready. I want you.”

Seven months in, and you and Jaemin were just now preparing to have sex for the first time. You’d touched each other, explored each other, but he always insisted he wanted it to be perfect. This, you decide, is perfect. He’s perfect. Nothing about him makes you nervous, and you’re more than ready to take the next step with him.

Neither of you are virgins, but it’d obviously been a while for you both. He lines himself up with your entrance and groans.

“You’re so wet,” he murmurs, as if he’s mesmerized. “I love you.”

To quell his nerves, you pull him down into a soft kiss, letting your mouths work together in perfect harmony while he slowly, carefully pushes inside you. His lips part, still pressed to yours, once he’s fully in.

Your eyes desperately want to flutter shut, but you don’t dare look away from him right now. He stays there for a moment, relishing in the feeling of the two of you finally being connected like this. Jaemin is deeply sentimental, so you know how much it means for him to take this step with you.

“You’re so beautiful,” he groans, taking your bottom lip between his teeth and tugging gently. “God, you feel so good.”

A small whimper leaves you at the sensation, and you rock your hips in response. “Move,” you tell him.

He drops his head to your neck, kissing, sucking, and nipping as he sets his pace. Oh so careful not to break you, he moans into your skin, the vibrations making your whole body tremble. The slide of him against your walls is intoxicating, and all you can do is take it, legs locked firmly around him as he takes you to a new world.

“Jaem.” You sigh, running your fingers through his hair for encouragement.

He continues to thrust, his breathing starting to increase when he gets closer to the edge. Without missing a beat, he reaches between the two of you to rub circles on your clit. You moan a bit louder than you should, but you don’t care.

Suddenly, you’re floating, brain going fuzzy when you reach heights you never thought you could. Your back arches into his body, nails digging into his shoulders as the world tilts off its axis.

“Shit,” he gasps, hips bucking. “You’re squeezing me so tight.”

You let out a shuddering breath, body slumping when you land from your free fall. Weaving your fingers through his hair, you pull him up to kiss you, swallowing his breathy whine as he cums.

Both of you sit there for a few moments, the only sounds are from the panting. He rests more of his weight on top of you, enveloping you in all the heat pouring out of his body. With a sweet kiss, he hums into your mouth.

“We’re gonna have to do that again.” He chuckles, his nose nuzzling your cheek. “You’re so fucking perfect.”

“Says you,” you retort.

“I’m so serious.” Jaemin frowns at you. “I’m going to make love to you forever. We’ll get old and gray and I’ll still find you sexy.”

You laugh, smacking his chest. “You’re ridiculous. But you better mean that.”

“I’ve never meant anything more.”

When Saturday rolls around, you head into your closet to pick out an outfit. You don’t want to wear anything too fancy, but not too casual either. Settling on a flowy, pale pink top and a pair of jeans, staring at yourself in the mirror for much too long.

No part of today has to be weird. You’ll show up, have a great night, go home, and repeat it again the next week. Even knowing that, you’re more nervous for tonight than you were for your interview yesterday.

You think you got the job, but you’d hear back for sure on Monday. Logically, you have nothing to worry about on either end.

You put Jaemin’s address into the map on your phone, and you see it’s not too far from your apartment. Donghyuck offered to pick you up, but you decided it’d be best if you got there on your own. That way, you don’t have to make Hyuck leave early if things aren’t going well for you.

You slide on your boots, checking your pockets to make sure you have everything before you walk out into the street. Locking the door behind you, you make your way over. It’s a little before six, but everyone knows you’re chronically early. Even when you and Jaemin were dating, you were at least fifteen minutes early for every occasion.

You’re excited to see Jaemin again, but you know you shouldn’t be. In fact, you distract yourself with the idea of all the other boys. You saw Hyuck already, but seeing all the others for the first time in years is going to be a great experience.

When you arrive at the building, you blink in surprise. With him being a successful businessman, you knew he probably didn’t live in the same place, but this one shocked you. It’s huge. There are probably dozens of floors, and you have to look at his text message again to see which one he’s on.

Twenty-four? Holy shit.

You step into the lobby, and the man at the front desk also serves as an elevator guard. When you approach, he raises his eyebrows at you.

“Where are you needing to go, ma’am?” he asks.

“Twenty-fourth floor, it doesn’t say a number on the text, though—”

“Let me call up there to confirm. What’s your name?”

“(Y/N),” you reply, shifting on your feet.

“One moment, please.” He grabs the phone off the hook and dials quickly. “Mr. Na, I have a woman here to see you. Her name is (Y/N).”

It only takes a second for the man to nod and hang up the phone. He bows his head to you and gestures behind him. “He said he’s expecting you.”

The doors part for you and you step inside, and somehow, the button for the twenty-fourth floor is already pressed. You wait patiently inside as you ascend, the nerves beginning to sink in. Jaemin might be expecting you, sure, but you’re probably going to be the first one there. You always are.

When the elevator dings and opens, you expect a hallway. Instead, you’re walking straight into Jaemin’s living room. The wall across from you is all glass, the buzzing city view below making your heart drop. Hardwood flooring covers the expanse of the room, a faux fireplace on with a large sectional in front of it, a coffee table, and several other seating arrangements.

A few bottles of rosé are in a bin of ice on the coffee table, with ten glasses set out. You frown, letting your mind wander on who they could be for.

“Oh, you’re here!” It’s not Jaemin’s voice you hear.

When you turn toward it, you’re surprised to see a woman. She’s beautiful, with long black hair and shining brown eyes, and it takes you less than a split second to realize who she is. What did you expect? Jaemin moved on, and you shouldn’t be surprised. Your ribcage shouldn’t be constricting as hard as it is right now, but you laugh as she gives you a hug.

“Sorry, I’m a hugger.” She chuckles as she pulls away from you. “I’ve heard so much about you. The boys get so crazy when good things happen. It’ll be nice to have another girl around here, Jiyoon and I are pretty close to insane. I’m Yeeun.”

She holds her hand out to you and you take it, overwhelmed by the information she’s given you. Jaemin walks out from the kitchen, his white button-down shirt sleeves rolled up to the elbows and the bottom hem tucked into a pair of blue jeans.

“Don’t scare her away.” Jaemin grins, shaking his head at her. “She’s kind of shy.”

“I’m not shy,” you retort.

“And that’s why you’re only one step inside, right?” Jaemin quirks an eyebrow, leaning his shoulder against the wall. “Make yourself at home. Lord knows everyone else does.”

“Where should I put my stuff?” I ask.

“The couch is fine. Everyone should be here soon.” Jaemin gestures over, but before you say anything else, he heads back into the kitchen.

“He’s so serious.” Yeeun cringes, walking with you to the couch. “Sometimes I think he’s got a stick in some places.”

“I can hear you,” Jaemin says.

You have to hold back another laugh.

“That’s the point,” she shouts back.

You take a seat and cross your legs, taking in the grandeur of Jaemin’s apartment. Various paintings hang on the walls and, in the midst of your concentration, something jumps in your lap. You gasp, throwing your hand over your mouth.

Thankfully, it’s just a kitten.

“Oh, that’s Luna.” Yeeun reaches over to give her a quick pet. “Jaemin’s got three cats. Luna, Lucy, and Luke. They kinda look similar, but you’ll learn them eventually.”

You stare at the animal in shock, wondering what convinced Jaemin to get three at once. Shrugging it off, you pick her up and hold her to your chest, running your hand over her soft fur.

“Chenle should be here any minute,” Yeeun says under her breath, glancing down at her phone. “Let me c—”

The elevator dings again, and Chenle walks in without a second thought. He tosses his jacket on the table and rolls his shoulders as if he’s done a bunch of work. Yeeun launches from the couch, and you can’t say you’re not relieved when you see her plant a kiss firmly on his lips. She’s not Jaemin’s girlfriend, she’s Chenle’s.

“You miss me after not seeing me for an hour?” he teases her, his arm wrapped around her waist.

“You’re so mean.” She scrunches her face, grabbing his hand and leading him over to the couch.

Chenle grins widely when he sees you and gives you a quick hug. “You finally decide to come back after five years?”

“Don’t be a brat.” You snort. “You’re elated I’ve returned.”

“We all are,” he says easily. “If I have to hear Hyuck cry one more time about you being thousands of miles away I might end him.”

“You and me both.”

“Oh, I had Yeeun come a little early. I knew you’d be atrociously early because you’re you, and I thought it might be weird with you and Jaemin alone, so…” Chenle lowers his voice.

“I appreciate you.” You smile, taking your spot back on the couch. “I’m okay, though. Really.”

Especially now that you know Jaemin’s not dating Yeeun.

“Chenle, I swear to God, if you eat all of this fucking board before everyone else gets here, I’m going to kill you.” Jaemin reenters, placing a charcuterie board down by the wine. “This took hours, dude.”

“I’ll leave it alone.” Chenle holds his hands up in mock surrender, sitting next to Yeeun and throwing his arm over her shoulders.

The next one to show up is Hyuck, who brings Mark in tow. They both hug you, and by now, conversation is flowing with everyone. Jeno is next, then Renjun and Jisung. You’re not sure what you were expecting from him, but he’s definitely turned into a grown up since the last time you’ve seen him.

“Holy shit,” you say, practically in awe. “Did you have seven growth spurts?”

“Actually, I think it was only one.” He laughs, patting your back. “I didn’t believe Hyuck when he said you were coming. Told him I’d have to see it with my own eyes first.”

When everyone is finally sitting down around the couch, you notice Chenle already eating some of the cheese. Jaemin glares at him, but he eventually gives up. You sit between Yeeun and Donghyuck, fading into the conversation in the way you used to. It warms your heart, and you have to fight the overwhelming feeling of having missed so much time.

Leaving was worth it. The experience you had was unlike any other, but you regretted not staying in contact with all of them—even Jaemin. Mark opens the wine first, pouring it into nine of the glasses.

“Where’s Jiyoon?” He frowns, directing his gaze to Jisung.

He shrugs. “She’ll be here soon. Her grandparents are in town, so she’s staying with her mom until they leave. But she shouldn’t be any later than seven-thirty.”

Your mind whirls at how they’re reacting to Jisung having a girlfriend like it’s normal. He’ll always be your baby brother in your eyes, regardless of blood relation.

“How’d your interview go?” Donghyuck asks you, roping you into the conversation.

“Oh, I think it went well. I find out for sure on Monday, so I’ll let you know.” You grin. “I’m ready to start making more money.”

“Why don’t you just come work for us?” Chenle offers. “I’m surprised Hyuck didn’t tell us you were looking for a job still.”

Donghyuck drops his head into his palm. “No shit, sherlock. Think about why I wouldn’t.”

“It doesn’t need to be like that,” Jaemin interjects, sighing. “(Y/N) and I are good. There’s no eggshells to walk on. Just let it go. Pretend it never happened.”

Pretend it never happened?

Your heart ping pongs around your chest, and you choke on your sip of wine. Everyone turns toward you and you chuckle nervously.

“Sorry. I wasn’t expecting this topic.” You set the glass down on the table, suddenly much less interested in it.

“If that’s what she wants, she can absolutely do that,” Jaemin continues. “If we’re ever going to be normal, we can’t be the only ones over it.”

You stare down at your lap, fidgeting with your hands as you try to ignore all the attention on you.

“Um.” You clear your throat. “I’m gonna go grab some water.”

You shoot up from your spot, darting into the kitchen before anyone can say anything else. Once you reach the island, you brace your palms on it to keep you afloat. You close your eyes and let out a deep breath.

“Hey,” Jaemin murmurs, stopping next to you. “Are you okay? I’m sorry if that was too much.”

“I’m fine.”

“Did I say something?” He furrows his eyebrows and shifts closer so you have to look at him.

“No, Jaemin, I promise. Everything’s good. I just need a minute.” You run your fingers through your hair and glance around the room. “Do you have water bottles?”

“In the fridge,” he replies.

Crossing his arms over his chest, he rests his back on the edge of the island, watching you as you grab one. You twist off the cap and take a sip.

“I don’t want you to be uncomfortable. That was never my intention.” Jaemin sighs.

“Regardless of your intention, I’m not uncomfortable. Everyone’s just so…different. But the same. And I missed you guys, you know? I missed Saturday nights and being around my favorite people, but it’s…Forget it. Please.”

“Okay.” He nods. “Come back out whenever you’re ready, then.”

Jaemin walks away from you, looking back once over his shoulder before he disappears around the corner. You bury your head in your hands, but you refuse to let anyone think you’re upset. About anything. Jaemin especially.

You take another drink of water before you follow him out to the living room. When you make it back to your spot between Hyuck and Yeeun, he leans over to whisper, “I got up to follow you and he looked like he would rip my head off if I moved another muscle.”

You snort. “Yeah, sure.”

Shortly after that incident, Jiyoon finally shows up. She’s a bit taller than Yeeun, with dyed blonde hair and brown eyes. Jisung introduces the two of you, and she greets you kindly. Mark fills her glass and hands it to her.

 You hear funny stories from Jeno, listen to Renjun scolding Jisung about something, and rest your head on Hyuck’s shoulder. He doesn’t seem to mind, so you don’t plan on moving. He’s having a heated discussion about something to do with stocks with Jaemin and Mark. You happily tune them out, because you have no idea what they’re talking about.

You finish your glass of wine and pour yourself another one. Chenle’s taken care of most of the charcuterie board by now, and Yeeun is showing him videos on her phone. You take a moment to appreciate everyone around you, something you never did before, and realize change may not be a bad thing.

Yes, everyone is different, but so are you. It’s magical when people grow up in the same direction, even past time, distance, and space. They’re all the same at their core, but older. Wiser. Happier. More mature.

You’re on your third glass by the time the night deepens. It must be past ten o’clock at this point, but you don’t feel tired at all. You’re surprised when Chenle and Yeeun leave first. They both hug you on their way out.

Apparently, they broke the seal, because Jisung and Jiyoon are next, followed closely by Renjun. Jeno doesn’t leave until eleven, and Mark and Donghyuck are packing up to leave as well.

“Do you need a ride home?” Hyuck asks.

“I’m okay.” You shake your head. “I’ll leave in a few minutes, don’t worry.”

He hesitates, but eventually listens to you. You’re left alone with Jaemin, much to your surprise, and he’s not kicking you out at the first opportunity he gets.

“Did you want help cleaning up?” you question.

“There’s not much to clean,” Jaemin replies, standing from his seat. “I won’t say no to help though.”

“Of course.” You chuckle and get up, brushing off your jeans. 

Grabbing a few of the glasses, you carry them into the kitchen and put them by the sink. Between the two of you, you’ve got everything in the kitchen within a few minutes.

“I’m glad you came,” Jaemin says, running the water to rinse out the dishes.

“Me too.” It’s not a lie. You love being in this group, but you wonder if there was a better way to ease back in.

“I…Can I say something?” he asks. “If it’s too weird, you can tell me no.”

“By all means.”

“You know I’m not mad at you, right? I’m not bitter and I don’t hate you. I missed you a lot, actually. But I don’t want you to think you can’t come around because of me.” He pauses, taking his bottom lip between his teeth. “I’m really proud of you. Of all the things you’ve accomplished, and I know we couldn’t have done the same things if we had stayed together.”

You don’t mean to let out a relieved breath, but his words take a weight off your shoulders. “Thank you, Jaem. I’m proud of you too.”

“Have one more drink with me? For old times’ sake?” 

“I’d love that.”

So that’s how you end up next to Jaemin on his couch, his feet kicked up on his coffee table. You make jokes, talk about everyday things, but the more you drink, the more you crave to know about the past, about what happened after you left.

“Is the past off-limits?” You turn to look at him, almost blushing when you realize how close his face is to yours.

“I don’t think so.” He shakes his head. “But for every question you ask me, I get to ask you one.”

“That sounds like a good deal.” You smile. “But you go first.”

He gives you a half-smile before pursing his lips as he thinks. “Was it easy for you? Over there, I mean.”

“I wouldn’t say it was easy. It’s hard to pinpoint the exact experience because things are so different here…but I don’t think I’d go back. It was a good experience, and I loved it, but this is where I belong.” You stop, contemplating your own question. “How were you?”

“Is complete honesty okay?” He quirks an eyebrow.

“It’s preferred, actually.” You take another sip.

“It took me a long time to recover. And I don’t want to make you feel bad, because what’s done is done, and we both needed the room to grow. You know, if you never hurt, you’ll never learn. Life is full of learning experiences. But yeah, I was a mess for a while. I loved you long after you left.” He smiles, as if loving you is a fond memory. “Do you miss me?”

Present tense. Miss. Not did you miss me, but do you miss me.

You chuckle, pursing your lips. “Yeah, I do.”

When you meet his gaze again, you see the soft look he gave you whenever he saw you before. He gulps, wetting his lips. Your heart twists in your chest as you realize what this means for you. No matter how much time passes, you’ll never stop loving Jaemin. It doesn’t matter how far apart you’ve been or for how long, because all of you yearns for all of him.

Your voice shakes when you ask your next question. “Where would we be if I hadn’t left? If I changed that, would everything be different?”

“Um.” He’s only inches away from you, studying your face with fervor. “In my mind, I definitely thought we’d be married by now. In love and happy, making babies that hopefully look more like you.”

You try not to let the tears form, but they sting your eyes anyway.

“Is that what you wanted?” he whispers.

“Well, I kinda wanted them to look more like you, but yeah.” You laugh as a tear falls, and you move to wipe it away, but Jaemin beats you to it. His thumb swipes across your cheek.

You’re not sure what’s happening between the two of you, but every part of you craves this.

“We were pretty great, huh?”

“Is that your question?” He smiles. “Because yeah, we were.”

“If that was mine, that one counted as yours too.” You lean into his touch, letting the warmth seep through your skin. “God, I wish it had been you. I wish you were the one.”

His lips part, but it sounds as if his words catch in his throat. He blinks rapidly for a second, gulping. “Who said I can’t be?”

He leans closer.

“I’m gonna kiss you now.”

Your heart drops, but you give him a tiny nod, aching for him. “Jaemin.”

He stops right before your mouths connect, and he lets out a sigh.

“Jaemin,” you repeat. “I have to say something first.”

“Okay.”

“I thought I got over you, but it’s only because I didn’t see you for years. Being with you right now…I might still love you, and if you’re not kissing me for the same reasons, we should stop before we both get hurt again.” You clench your eyes shut, refusing to look at him while you make a fool of yourself.

“I was hoping you’d say that.” He doesn’t give you the chance to respond, kissing you hard. You melt into him, much like the ways you used to.

He shifts to cup both of your cheeks, his mouth working against yours in that perfect harmony you’d only ever found with him. You grasp onto his sleeves. When he pulls away, he rests his forehead on yours.

“I…” he trails off, wetting his lips. “I want you.”

His voice is raspy as he says it, and it sends heat between your legs. You clench your thighs together.

“Me too,” you reply. “I want you, too.”

“Are you sure?” he asks.

“Of course.” You lean forward to kiss him, and as your lips meet his, he pulls you onto his lap. Straddling him, you weave your fingers in his hair and hold him close to you.

His hands dip down to your ass, squeezing it and pushing you a bit forward. You groan when you feel his tongue slide across your bottom lip, and you give him access. Without a fight, you let him dominate your mouth. When you grind down, you gasp when you feel him hardening beneath you.

“You’re so perfect,” he whispers, only breaking the kiss for a split second.

He lets out a small whine when you pull away from him, but he’s quickly silenced when you tug your blouse over your head. While he stares at your black lace bra, you work on unbuttoning his shirt.

 “Not here,” he interrupts you, grabbing your hands. “There’s only one place I want to have you right now.”

He stands, holding onto you tightly while you wrap your legs around his waist. For a brief second, you think about what Hyuck would say to you right now—if he would be okay with it or if he would call it a mistake—but you chase the thought away as fast as it comes.

Jaemin carries you to his bedroom, kicking the door shut behind him. He sets you delicately onto his bed, the familiar softness making you sigh. After he finishes taking his shirt off, he climbs on top of you, kissing your cheek, your jawline, down the pulse thundering in your neck, your collarbone, the swells of your breasts. He leaves marks on them before continuing his descent.

And then he’s at the hem of your jeans. He looks up at you, eyebrows raised. “Can I?”

“Please.”

Jaemin is a unique lover. He memorizes all the things you love, what makes you tick, and what he can do to elevate your pleasure. You’ve never had to fake it with him.

“It’s been a while for me,” he mutters. “It might not be…the best.” He clears his throat awkwardly, but pops the button and unzips the zipper.

“I’ll be happy with whatever you can give me,” you say.

His confidence returns after that, and he moves to tug your pants down your legs. You try your best to help him get them off of you, and he finally makes it back between your legs. He rubs his thumb over the obvious wet spot in your panties, humming to himself.

“Time doesn’t change how wet you get for me, huh?” He tsks, pressing a kiss to your clit through the fabric.

When he tugs them down, he admires you before leaning forward. You don’t expect the electric shock you feel when his mouth comes in contact with your core, but it has your back arching when he’s hardly done anything. Your hand immediately finds his hair, gripping it.

His tongue slides along your entrance, barely dipping inside before flicking your clit. He teases you like this a few times, but then his lips wrap around your sensitive bud and he sucks. His fingers trail up your thigh, and he extracts a moan from you when he pushes them inside you.

You inadvertently clench your thighs around his head. He moans against you, the vibrations sending pleasure shooting up your spine. You don’t mean to push him closer to you, but you can’t help it. Everything inside you feels like it’s crumbling and coming together at the same time under his ministrations.

You writhe much more than you should, and if it were anyone other than Jaemin, you’d be embarrassed.

“You taste so good,” he groans against you, thrusting his fingers faster. “So beautiful when you drip for me like this.”

He curls his fingers, and you slap a hand over your mouth to muffle your pleasure. One last flick of his tongue on your clit has your back arching, the bubble bursting inside you as you grind into his face.

After he’s helped you ride through your high, you sit up, sending him back a bit. You quickly reach for his pants, squeezing the prominent bulge before undoing the button and zipper. He steps out of them , pulling you toward the edge of the bed.

“We don’t have to,” he says, breathless. “We can wait if you’re not sure.”

“Jaem,” you reply, cupping his cheeks. “I’ve never wanted you more than I do right now.” You tug him down, kissing him with all your might. You taste yourself on him, but it does little to bother you. All you want is him.

His tongue explores your mouth while he finds the clasp of your bra. He pulls it away from you, guiding you back down onto the bed. His kiss trails down once more, stopping at your breast so he can take your nipple into his mouth. He swirls it, teeth gently scraping.

Finally, he’s shoving his underwear down and grabbing a condom from his nightstand. He rolls it on before joining you on the bed once more, and you feel his tip prodding at your entrance.

“You’re absolutely sure?” He pauses, giving as serious of a look as he can muster. “If we do this, you’re mine again, you know that, right?”

“I’ve always been yours, Jaemin,” you remind him, lifting your hips. “That never changed.”

You barely have time to finish your sentence before he’s pushing inside you, face contorting with pleasure as he bottoms out. Heart pounding, you grip onto his shoulders and wrap your legs around his waist.

“You okay?” he whispers, leaning down to kiss your neck. His eyelashes flutter across your skin, your body already slightly sticky from a thin sheen of sweat from your first indescribable high.

“Please move,” you whimper.

Jaemin moves slowly at first, allowing you both to get used to the feeling of being connected again. It’d be a long while since you’d done anything, too. He pants, nipping and sucking at the sensitive part of your throat.

His hips rock steadily, making sure to press as deep as he can every time. You're already a moaning mess below him, holding onto him for dear life.

“I’m sorry,” he says softly. “I’m not gonna last long.”

In response, you tighten your legs around him and flip him over, leaving him on his back and you on top. His eyes trail all over your body. You roll your hips. He sits up, grabbing your waist and pressing your chest against his, his dark, hardened gaze meeting yours as if this is a challenge.

“Lay back,” you tell him, running your hand down the hard planes of his chest as you gently push him back down. “Just watch.”

He gulps, but does as you say. His hands relax on you and he allows you to set your own pace. You lift up, shuddering at how he feels rubbing on your walls. His fingers twitch as if he wants to pull you back down.

“Baby,” he groans.

You set a steady pace, a bit faster than what his was. He traces down your body, leaving goosebumps in his wake as he moves downward until his thumb is pressed to your clit. You bite your lip to stop your moan, leaning back and bracing yourself on his thighs. He’s a mess beneath you, pleasure written across his face. It makes you want to do more, to work harder to bring him to his edge.

You’re so wet, slick sounds of him entering you fill the silence between sounds of euphoria. His thumb glides back and forth so easily, you have to pick up the speed. Everything around you begins to go fuzzy, and you know you’re approaching your second orgasm of the night much faster than you’d like.

Mid-way through your lift-up, your high hits, forcing you back down on his cock to finish with him buried deep inside, stretching you out. He sits back up, guiding you up and down as you slump onto his chest. He meets you halfway, thrusting up as he pulls you down.

He lets out a deep groan and holds you close to him, gently rocking his hips. He gasps for breath, pressing gentle kisses to your shoulder.

“I love you,” Jaemin whispers. “Don’t go again.”

“I’m not going anywhere.” You shake your head. “I love you, too.”

He opens his mouth to say something, but you both frown when you hear the elevator ding.

“Who is that?” you ask, climbing off of him on shaky legs to try and find your clothes.

“Not a clue.” Jaemin frowns, quickly disposing of the condom and putting his underwear and pants back on. He comes back to kiss your cheek. “Stay here. I’ll be right back.”

He walks out into his living room, but you get dressed quickly so you can follow him out. You hear him conversing with someone, but you’re not sure who it is. You’re finally back in your jeans and shirt, so you head out to check out what’s going on.

You know your hairs a mess, your makeup is definitely smeared, and your face is red, and on top of all of that, you’re coming out of Jaemin’s room. Anyone with a brain would see what’s going on.

Chenle moves over to the couch and grabs a purse, which is presumably Yeeun’s, and claps Jaemin on the shoulder before he notices you.

“(Y/N)?” He blinks in surprise, glancing between you and Jaemin. “This is a new development.”

“It’s not really that new,” Jaemin says. “Um, we were kind of…busy, though. If you could…”

“Right.” Chenle shakes his head. “Right. You two have fun. Not too much fun, and make sure no one gets hurt this time, please?”

“Are you going to tell Donghyuck?” You scrunch up your nose.

“I’ll give you a twenty-four hour head start.” He grins, saluting you both. “Take care of each other, dipshits.”

You massage your forehead with a sigh, and Jaemin approaches you.

“You got dressed.” He pouts.

“Well, yeah. Somebody was here.” You chuckle.

“Were you wanting to leave?” he asks, eyebrows furrowing. “It’s okay if you do, I just…thought we’d spend the night together.”

“I don’t want to leave,” you tell him. “I told you I’m not leaving you again, Jaem. I meant it.”

“Then let’s get back to bed.” Jaemin massages your shoulders gently as he guides you back to his room.

He gets you a T-shirt to wear to bed, and once you’ve changed into it, you crawl onto his mattress and wait for him to join you. Instead, he stares at you, a smile on his face.

“I never thought I’d get you like this again.”

“You were always the one for me, Jaemin. It just wasn’t the right time.” You rest your head on one of his pillows, patting the spot next to you. “Now come over here.”

He finally listens, climbing under the comforter and pulling you to him until you’re pressed into his chest.

Kissing the top of your head, he hums. “We’ll have everything we ever wanted.”

[ghost-with-a-teacup]

𝐘𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐆𝐨𝐥𝐝𝐞𝐧 𝐄𝐲𝐞𝐬 ~ 𝐒𝐢𝐦𝐨𝐧 '𝐆𝐡𝐨𝐬𝐭' 𝐑𝐢𝐥𝐞𝐲 𝐱 𝐑𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫

Summary: It's become a ritual at this point for Simon to ask you to help with his eyepaint before a mission, but that might just be an excuse for him to hold you close before he must become 'Ghost' once more. OR Simon just needs some extra tender loving, and we're here to give that to him :)) Pairing: Simon 'Ghost' Riley x Reader (No pronouns used!) Word Count: 1.0K words Warnings: None! Unless you're allergic to fluff I suppose :p Author's Note: I CANNOT get enough of this man, and this prompt came to me in a dream haha. It's just very very soft Simon, hope you enjoy!!

The sun sat low in the sky, painting the world in a soft golden light just outside the windows of your room. It was a shame you couldn’t admire it in its entirety, instead having to busy yourself with packing your gear for the upcoming mission with 141 in the next 3 hours.

Gloves, ammo, med kit… you mentally checked off in your head despite knowing that with how long you’ve been doing this, packing your kit was like stating the alphabet.

Zipping up the final pocket, the final run-through was interrupted by three short knocks on your door.

Making your way over, you open the door and are met with the hulking figure of Ghost himself, his regular black balaclava and intimidating skull mask replaced with a simpler skull one.

“Simon! Didn’t know you’d be coming by so soon,” you say with a smile, gesturing for him to come in. He does so without hesitation, only humming lowly in response.

He takes note of your outfit, still not yet in tactical gear. Fuzzy yellow socks paired with shorts and one of his sweaters. While you were by no means the tiniest person on the planet, his clothes never managed to make you look like anything but.

‘Cute’ he thought to himself. There was a reason your callsign was ‘Sol’ after all, with you being the bright light of the task force, a glow that rivalled the sun itself. It also meant you burn just as strongly, your proficiency on the battlefield was very proof of that.

He sits down on your bed as if it were his own, which, at this point it practically was. If you weren’t in his room then he was in yours.

You and Simon had been dating for years now, going on 4 years next month. You had both met even before the task force was created, when you were nothing more than a private and he was a Sergeant climbing through the ranks. It was a slow but steady path to get to where you both were now, but you wouldn’t have it any other way.

Just look at the man, anyone would do the same.

“Pack all your things for the mission yet?” you ask, stepping into the space between his legs. He only grasped your hips and pulled you in closer.

“Yeah, though I am missing one thing, figured you could help me with it,” he says before reaching into his pocket and pulling out a pot of black paint paired with a brush.

You only grin in response, taking them into your own hands.

“Always,” you reply.

It was practically a ritual now, every time you had a mission Simon would get you to do his eyepaint. It was a simple little task, but no less intimate. It served as a grounding before you headed into the heat of battle, allowed for a moment to simply be close, to exist in each others space before you both had to become ‘Ghost’ and ‘Sol’.

You situated yourself down on his lap as he wrapped his arms around your waist, the warmth of his large hands seeping through your clothes.

Placing the paint down in your lap for a moment, you return your focus back to him.

“This okay?” you ask softly as your fingers brushed over the edge of his balaclava. Simon only nods slightly. While you couldn’t remember the last time he didn’t allow you to take it off, you still asked every time without fail. It was the least you could do, after all he’s been through.

Tugging off the mask you’re met with his beautiful face. As though crafted by the hands of the Gods himself he glowed in the light of the sun, stealing your breath away.

No matter how many times you’ve seen his face over the years, your reaction never changes.

Brushing your fingers over his face lightly, you pull him close for a tender kiss. No heat or passion, simply love, as though to say “I’m here, as are you. Us, together.” Pulling away, you smile as you look into his honeyed eyes, the love you held for him mirrored in his own.

“Let’s get to it, yeah?” you say.

“Let’s,” Simon murmurs quietly.

Opening up the pot of paint you get to work. No words are said between the two of you, and there didn’t need to be. Instead, you both bask in the comfortable silence and the presence of each other.

With gentle strokes, you apply the black paint, the first of many steps it takes to turn back into ‘Ghost’ when all he had to be was ‘Simon’ with you here on base. But that was the way your worlds worked, it was living two different lives. And while both were your true selves, they remained separate, neither persona belonging in the other’s world.

Methodically you tilt his head back and forth for even application across his eyes while he only relished in your soft touch, eyes closed in domestic bliss.

After a few minutes you were done, and you tapped his cheek with a finger playfully.

“Alright, all done big guy,” you say, but Simon doesn’t move to get up. He only opens his eyes momentarily before pulling you into a hug.

Pulling you as close as you could possibly get, his fingers tangled gently through your hair as he buried his face into the crook of his neck, inhaling deeply.

“Simon! You’ll smudge the face paint,” you said with a laugh, “and get it all over my neck. You have any idea how hard it is to get off?” you admonished teasingly, but Simon only shushed you softly.

“Just…let me do this for a moment, love,” he says, his voice uncharacteristically soft. While Simon was sometimes a man of few words, when he spoke he was heard.

“Okay,” you respond, wrapping your arms around him as best you could before also tangling your fingers through his soft blond hair.

You both just sat there holding each other for a little while as the sun continued to set behind you. As the day transitioned into night, and before you both had to turn back into ‘Ghost’ and ‘Sol’ once more.

Tags: @bloodonmyhands-1221

[dnsbarbie]

DEAR READER | C.L 16 (FOUR)

Pairings: Charles Leclerc X Intern!OC

Warnings: Google translated French, degrading headline, people who don’t mind their own business

Note: There’s a reason I’m dragging the fuck out of this story. It’s gonna be worth it, I promise !!!!

❝Dear reader,

If it feels like a trap, you’re

already in one ❞

THE BRILLIANT ILLUMINATED ELEVATOR cradled through the rapidly infectious tension in Natalia’s bloodstream. The gap between her and the equally as anxious Monegasque caused the ongoing brawl in their heads to amplify. She glanced down at the carpeted flooring, casually shifting her gaze to the shuffling feet of her company.

She let her thoughts wonder somewhere else, opting to think about the disastrous path they had to conquer in order to acquire the tranquility they have at the moment. Although, her trembling hands and the intensive battering of her chest generated the thought that perhaps road raging in Charles’ Ferrari to avoid the prying eyes of the general public provided a greater deal of enjoyment than this.

“I was thinking,” Charles spoke, moistening his drought lips. “Since it’s your first time here in Netherlands, I’d like you to try authentic Dutch dishes from the restaurant the team took me to last year.”

Natalia nodded, half of her mind floating into a dreamless space. “That sound great,” She faced him, hoping to defy the rising tide of her anxiety. “I honestly didn’t know anything about Dutch culture until I did a quick research about their food.”

Charles didn’t contain his smile, finally looking at the brunette. His gaze journeyed to her luscious naturally straight chestnut locks, previously tied into a neat ponytail but was now released from the gathered style, falling graciously passed her shoulders.

He snapped back into his regular self as he reached the line of her eyes. Immediately saving himself as he followed up on her statement. “Oh? And what did you find?”

Charles despised the way she’d tuck her bottom lip in her every time she needed a second to gather her thoughts. Couldn’t she just think like a normal person?

“Apparently, there’s this food called Profferjes?” She struggled pronouncing the supposed name given to the delicacy she was referring to.

Charles’ face brightened in amusement at her confused appearance but he nevertheless, nodded, having an idea of what she was talking about.

“The mini pancakes?”

Rhapsody laved across her once perplexed expression, pointing a finger at his direction before confirming his guess.

“Yes! That one— but I think they only serve them in the morning,” She sighed, eyes lingering at Charles. A sudden concept bubbled in her mind, showing in her face as a small simper.

The judgement was also beginning to bloom on Charles’ face as he took note of the naught sparkle in Natalia’s orbs.

“Unless— you know—” She drawled her words, making the smile on the receiver of her antics widen. “Charles Leclerc were to call in—”

He disintegrated into a pile of frenzy at that. Clutching his stomach as his laughter, joined in by Natalia’s own, bounced uncontrollably against the four walls of the enclosed space.

“I’m not sure they’d do their beloved Max Verstappen’s rival a favor.” He acknowledged.

“Oh—right.” Natalia had completely forgotten that Max was Dutch. She knew Charles meant it as a joke but the harsh reality seemed to have overtaken its intended merits.

Then again, she was quick to dispel the impending depressive state. “You know, according to my research, Dutch people are very friendly even if they like speak their mind . . .”

An appreciative hum sounded at the back of Charles’ throat, thankful for her efforts of comfort and the ding of the elevator that indicated their arrival to his floor.

In an unconscious move, he reached for Natalia’s hand, grasping it gently in his. To which the latter responded by gawking at him while they both stalked through the nicely lit corridor.

Charles’ room was two doors away from the very last one, and when they arrived, he tapped in his key card, never seeming to have the intention of releasing the chilling palm that rested in his hold.

As the door opened, along with the grating creak of the door was the heightening of Natalia’s senses. The fresh scent of lavender infiltrated the previous musing scouring at her wits.

She inhaled the saving grace of her sanity, finding the soothing aroma also matched the overall aesthetic of his room.

The fuzzy brown carpet at the center of the room adorned the flooring, to which an oval glass coffee table was placed

“Sit wherever you want,” He said, freeing her hand. “Make yourself feel comfortable.”

As he started to walk away, Natalia bent down balancing her weight with her hand on the doorframe as she untied the laces of her boots.

Charles turned to her, hearing the sudden rustling. “You don’t have to take your shoes off,”

She immediately halted her actions, eyebrows wrinkled at the absurdity of all that. “There’s no way I’m stepping my shoes on a carpet,”

The crease in her eyebrows worsen at that thought of her mother. She could almost see the utter disgust on her face when she finds out Europeans don’t particularly care for what she called “unknown bacteria” spreading through their home.

She set her boots aside, plopping on the pearl colored seating. “My mom would’ve strangled you if she heard you say that,”

Her remark made Charles chuckle, shaking his head on his way to the kitchen. “Would you like something to drink?”

“Depends.” She thought, reaching for a magazine on the coffee table. “What are you having?”

Natalia heard a series of cabinet creaking followed by clinks of what she assumed was glass.

“Well, of you’re craving something sweet, I have orange juice and iced tea,” He replied, peaking his head on the doorframe.

Charles took in the sight of Natalia’s wandering eyes on his apartment, ignoring the sudden pang of nervousness creeping up on him.

The curious girl whipped her head towards his waiting figure, lips pursing with a uncaring shrug. “I’m good with that. But if you want to drink something. . . stronger, I wouldn’t judge.”

She watched the chuckle bloom out of Charles’ relaxed features, before disappearing back into the kitchen.

While he was arranging beverages, Natalia reviewed what he had observed from his apartment.

Firstly, she found it surprising that he owned a living space in this country. Him always hopping on a jet to different countries every week, defeats the purpose of buying one. It didn’t look like he used it often either.

It had one of those minimal modern designs. Like the ones she’d see whenever she was at Summit Furniture, a furniture store she frequented at in Monaco. She currently sat on a white polyester loveseat with tapered rosewood legs that angled outwards. It all seemed like they’ve just been bought yesterday. No scratches on the wooden legs nor flaws in the fabric seating. Same goes for the rest of his furniture that she had seen so far.

The television looked like it had yet to serve its purpose and the tables be marked with any stain or evidences of usage.

Her deep observation caused a barricading and tension within her sense. The unbelievable tidiness and perfection of her surroundings made her more conscious of her actions.

“Here we are!” Charles’ unforeseen appearance rattled her core, prompting her to sit up straighter. He had brought a tray of various drinks.

Natalia eyed the colorful liquids in different types of glasses. Some in one in a high ball, champagne and cocktail glass. Beside those were a bottle of Heineken and Jenever.

She bit the inside of her cheek, trapping the laughter threatening to pull through, settling for a supportive nod.

“I’m guessing this is the orange juice?” She plucked the high ball glass from the tray, a teasing smile adorning her face.

“Yes, it is,” Charles took out his phone, the unwavering nerves still present in his veins. “I know I said I’ll order for you, but here’s the menu, you might see something you like—”

She raised his hands, shaking her head. “Trust me, the only food I’m sure are gonna be are Stroopwafel and those ball shaped snack I ate at the paddock. Besides, I’m not picky with food, I’ll swallow anything you give me.”

Charles’ thumbs stopped their typing, his lips thinning at the intrusive thought in his head.

Anything, huh?

“You’re disgusting—”

“I didn’t say—”

“That’s not what I meant!”

“I didn’t say anything!”

“You didn’t have to! It’s written all over your face!” Natalia growled, motioning to the idiotic smirk hanging of his face across her.

“Think what you want,” Charles chimed, resuming his attention to his device. “That’s what I’m doing anyway hmpf—”

A soft object suddenly collided at his face, laughing as he realized that Natalia had thrown a pillow at him.

He removes it from obstructing his view, glancing up at the glowering figure in front of him, now bringing her lips close to the tall glass of juice.

“Give the phone. . .” She said, extending her arm forwards for Charles to pass her the device.

He hands it to her, inclining his body towards her. “I personally love Hachee, it’s meat with mash potatoes and gravy—”

“Frog legs!”

Charles stopped talking, staring stupidly at her exclamation. A wide smile plastered on her face as she turned the phone towards him and pointed to the certain dish.

“You eat frogs?” Charles didn’t mean for it to sound condescending, but the overpowering shock at this discovery halted all sense of thinking.

“Yeah? And?” At her defensive tone, Charles quickly held his hands up, waving them at her.

“No! That’s not what I mean!” He scratched the back of his head, hoping to ward away the embarrassment of his mistake. “I-I just mean, you’re the first girl I’ve met who’s actually excited to eating frogs,”

Natalia raised an eyebrow at Charles. “That can’t be true, frogs are eaten a lot in Manaco,”

“Doesn’t mean everybody likes them,” Charles remarked, taking the bottle opener from the table before twisting it on a Heineken beer.

Natalia watched him take a sip, crossing her arms at his statement. “You mean to say— of all the Monegasque girls you’ve dated— not a single one ate frogs?”

Charles felt amusement trickling at his through as he spotted the doubt on her face. “Well, I did let them try it.” He restored. “But they either pretended to like it or just straight up told me, quite frankly that they’d rather eat dirt.”

Natalia lights up at that, bringing her hands together in an mirthful clap. “At least some were honest about it,”

Charles nodded, glancing up at her as he began to wonder wether or not he should consume more alcohol to gain the courage to ask her questions that may be deemed too personal. Threading lightly on the subject, he reached for the Daquiri, giving in to its undeniable seductive calling.

“Is it a common food in the Philippines?” He asked, eyes traveling to the curvature of her expression.

Natalia’s lips disconnected from the cold glass rim, licking away the numbness spreading through her mouth. “Not exactly all over the country, but in my province, we do eat it a lot,” A mirror of nostalgia passes by her eyes, slotting in the depths of her memories.

Charles observed as she spaced out, blankly staring at the wooden coffee table. Instead of snapping her out of her trans, he waited patiently for her to regain her train of thought.

Blinking rapidly, the fog of her brain slowly disappeared, a large intake of breath released from her lungs before she cleared her throat.

As she craned her neck back to the person she was talking to, her heart lurched at her throat at the intensity of his stare. His eyes were drowned in unbelievable intent, as if she’d disappear if he was to look away.

“Let’s play that game again,” He said, softly.

“What?”

“That game in the car. 20 questions,” He clarified, tilting his head at her, “I want to play it again.”

Dread filled her mind, mouth beginning to ache, along with the slight tremble of her voice. “Why?”

“We’re going to spend a lot of time together,” He pointed out. “I’ve know you for quite a while but I don’t know anything about you. . .”

“There’s nothing to know,” She huffed, eyebrows coming together in a pinch. “My life isn’t interesting in the slightest.”

Charles narrowed his eyes at her, careful not to overstep. “I’ll ask basic questions then,”

She scrunched her face up at him. “Like what?”

With his eyes on her, he shrugged. “How did you end up in Monaco?”

“That’s not—” She sighed, pulsing her palms into an alternating clench. Her hands came up to snatch the beer off the table, taking a large gulp of it.

This was not a good idea from the start but then again, she made no complaints about it either.

Setting the bottle down with a loud clank, she tuts at his waiting figure. “I applied for the scholarship grant, almost failed the final interview, found out I didn’t, and— lo and behold, I’m here.”

The vagueness of her answer made Charles roll his eyes. “You almost failed? Why?” He questioned.

Natalia frowned at him, wagging her finger up at his line of vision. “No—no, it’s my turn,”

Charles sighed, defeated, downing a shot of tequila as the former thought of her first question. “Who’s your favorite sibling?”

Taken aback, he smiled at her random choice of words. “I don’t have one,”

His answer was met by a judgmental glance. “Boo! Everybody has one. Come on!”

Hesitation reeled him in with the desire to end thos query immediately. So, with all the shame warped into a giant ball in his heart. Je all but murmured a name.

“Sorry, say that again?” He could practically feel the teasing smirk on her face as she neared her ear on his mouth.

His eyes fluttered close, amusement and annoyance dancing at his veins. “I said, Arthur—”

She laughed, finding his imminent torture to have soothe her pounding heart. “Don’t feel bad, it’s pretty obvious anyway,”

At that, Charles didn’t indulge in her usual provocative style. Instead, thwacking her back with another personal question.

“What do your parents to for a living?”

She coughed, the sharp taste of alcohol pricking at her throat as it violently drew back to her nose.

“Are you okay?” The concern etched visible at the lines of Charles’ face as he stood up to hand her a tissue. He sat next to her, plucking more out of the box as she attempted to stop the liquid pouring out from her nostrils.

She gratefully took the tissue from him, blowing her nose into it. She would’ve found it embarrassing as she heard the disgusting noise it made as she emptied her now stinging nose of the culprit if it weren’t for her spinning mind.

She wiped her jeans, trying to play it cool as she responded. “My parents— My mom was an accountant and my dad— he. . . used to trade oil.”

Charles peaked onto her face, wiping of the remnants of beer on her cheek. “What’s wrong with that?”

Natalia swallowed the painful block of her throat, hand coming up to where he had his on her face. “Nothing. . . I-it’s not their jobs. I just wasn’t expecting you to ask about my parents.”

“We—”

The loud ringing of a phone interrupted their conversation. Natalia felt the vibration in her bag before she realized it was hers.

This dispelled the heavy ambiance of the atmosphere, waking the occupants from their trance.

Oh shit, Natalia thought as she saw the caller’s name flash on her phone.

Nicolas Todt

As soon as she pressed the green button signifying her death, the device was gone, only to be taken by the tutting Monegasque beside her.

She immediate shuffled up, desperately trying to get the phone out of his grip. It was too late, however, as he stood up at the sound of his manager’s voice.

Deflating in defeat, Natalia hopelessly smothered her head on the soft cushion’s of the couch.

“Hello?”

“What are yo— Hello? Charles? Is that you?”

Natalia winced at the pure hostility in Nicolas’ tone. Even after figuring out that the taker of the call was indeed his well-loved client, it didn’t quell the scorching heat of his flaming outrage.

“Oui c'est moi. Quoi de neuf?” Yes, it’s me. What’s up?

In contrast to Charles’ collected attitude, Natalia could feel her insides churning slowly into a blob of mush. Her only wish was for Charles not to ruin this job for her was beggining to whither away with the his careless actions.

“Quoi de neuf?” What’s up? Nicolas echoed, his sharp scoff going through the phone’s speaker and stabbing Natalia directly in the deepest part of her chest.

“Vous n'avez pas vérifié votre téléphone?” He spat, as it were acid poured on his tongue.

At the word phone, Natalia’s head shot up from the condoling compressor of her resting place, panicking as she searched for her phone.

The cumulus fog accumulating her head, clouded the clarity of her thinking, making her forget that someone else had possessed the thing she was looking for.

Charles nodded along to the string of profanities Nicolas kept rambling through his ear, shifting her attention to the frightened girl on his couch. Her heightened vigilance evident as trembling her hands patted wildly along his furniture.

He aided her frantic movements with a soft brush of his hand on her cheek, tapping his thumb on her paled skin.

Natalia whipped her head around to face him, breathing out of sigh of relief as she followed his finger pointing to his phone.

Wasting no time, she snagged it off the table, nearly shoving it on Charles’ face when it demanded a passcode after failing the face recognition system.

Charles careened his head backwards to avoid the object barreling into his face.

Natalia waited, anxiously fiddling with the stitchings of her clothing, as the daunting atmosphere worsened every second that passed by.

She almost tore Charles’ entire arm from his body by the vast amount of force she exerted at him. Quickly tapping on Google app, her hands shook as they hovered over the keys, thoughts failing to conjure words she needed.

“Charles Leclerc girlfriend. . .” A whisper came next to her.

She gritted her teeth at the awful joke. Perhaps as knew it wasn’t an impossible headline. It dawned to her the severity of their offense as she typed his name on the search bar.

It appears that her groan of indignation was loud enough for Nicolas’ ears as Natalia heard his mocked version of it despite being on Charles’ space.

“Did you see it?” Nicolas queried, his tone unreadable.

Natalia turned the screen to Charles’ vision. And the idiot had the audacity to laugh.

Merely hacking into his balled fist, the presence of his teeth behind his lips irritated both Nicolas and Natalia.

In disgustingly big letters, the headline read:

Natalia swiped at the screen, ticking her brow in victory as the smile drained visibly off his face at what she had shown.

“Now, that’s not funny. . .”

You don’t say. . .” She gritted, padding a hand on her chest to feign shock.

Charles offered her an apologetic pat on the head of the sneering girl. The latter slapped his hand away, force firm but not enough to do any harm.

Natalia could hear the faint murmurs of Nicolas before his voice was amplified by Charles’ simple tap of the speaker phone.

“Listen, both of you,” He commended. “Gossip magazines aren’t exactly fond of what ever it is you’re doing.”

“I am so sorry—”

“You are not.” The dripping venom in his tone made Natalia flinch back, leaning away from the source of his voice as if he were to pop out of the screen. “I don’t know what you were both thinking but luckily social media loved your little rendezvous.”

Silence fell between the scolded individuals, eyes creeping up to see the other’s reaction. Like staring directly at a mirror, they alined body language that could only be read as confusion.

“So. . . That means?” Natalia trailed, leveling her vocals in light of steering clear of another possible volcanic eruption from Nicolas.

“It means. . .” Nicolas pressed, annoyance still present. “You have to continue your. . . what you call it?”

Natalia listen intently as Nicolas asked someone for the word he was searching for. “The what? Oh— yes that. . . Your situationship.”

“Ew no!” Natalia’s extreme protest was met with sheer bewilderment on Charles’ part, struggling to process the meaning of the foreign term.

“What is that? What’s a situationship?”

At his question, Natalia stirred back to him, giving him a look of disbelief. Nicolas on the other hand simply clicked his tongue, sighing brfore supplying the answer to his client.

“They’re two people who have no sense of direction regarding their relationship.” He explained, and though he cannot see the expression on Charles’ face, he knew very well what it was.

“Is that a bad thing?”

Natalia’s jaw slackened, palm slapping on his forehead. And although she knew Nicolas’ explanation of situationship was a fairly watered down version of the real deal, she didn’t have the strength to further Charles’ knowledge on the subject.

Nicolas ignored his question. “We’ll talk more about this tomorrow. I advise you to not step out of that building until daylight.”

Natalia’s eyes widened at that. “What? You want me to stay here?”

“Certainly.” He concluded.

Sensation drained completely from her body. The electric feeling of lacking blood, slowly spread in an infectious manner. With it, the chill of reality came to set in.

“I’ve already informed Toto of the situation.”

As if it wasn’t enough, after hearing that, the lavender scent of the atmosphere that was thought to have the a calming effect seemed impotent, in comparison to the vigorous hold this ghastly chain of anxiety had on her.

Of all the things she feared, the idea of disappointing Toto Wolff and Susie Wolff was an absolute nightmare. How could she face the people who gave her the opportunity of a life time if she were to do dim-witted things like this?

In the midst of her internal battle, her head stirred to the cause of her misbehavior. He just so happened to be looking at her as well.

Unlike the pointed glare she blatantly jabbed into his face, Charles offered her a worried glance that could bloom flowers on his pretty little head.

Despite her scornful demeanor, she couldn’t shake away the guilt of being in this position. She was aware that it wasn’t Charles’ fault alone but perhaps putting all the blame in him would ease her desire to simply jump on a boat and abandon everything she ever dreamed in her life.

Natalia recoiled at the sudden warmth on her arm. Look towards the source, she relaxed at the sight of Charles’ hand on her skin.

He had ended the call, sitting back down on his previous place. “How do you want to do this?”

Natalia heaved a heavy sigh, afraid that the force might collapse her lungs. “I honestly can’t think of anything else but being fired. . .”

Charles took her hand in a grip that he could only hope held the comfort he was trying to induce. “You won’t. I’m the reason you’re here. I’ll talk to them.”

“You better. . .” She huffed, shoving a strong palm at his shoulder. “I don’t think I’ll be able to look my classmates in the eye when I have to go back to University, though.”

“When do you have to go back?” He asked.

“In three days. We have to submit a report every two weeks regarding our performance.” She expounded, thinking about the sour look on her headmaster’s face at the sight of his achingly popular student walking in her office.

“Well, in that case, you can say that you helped me increase my fanbase by 2% in just three weeks.” Charles tried to provide a consolation.

Natalia hummed, lips curling as she was reminded of that information. “You make it sound like I’m a one-man team. . .” She shook her head.

She was sure that Charles’ PR team wouldn’t appreciate her taking all the credit for the improvements in the Ferrari driver’s personal accounts.

“Probably not. But most of it was your idea.”

It was intended to aid the boisterous voices crowding the little space left in her brain that wasn’t consumed by the nauseating noise of failure but alas proved to be ineffective as she abruptly stood up and took her phone from Charles’ lap.

Tapping the number she knew would cover the gaping hole of fear continuously scraping at her brain.

She watched as her phone started ringing, the name of her partner in crime flashing on the screen.

Lissie

[nikolais-eyepatch]

THIS TOOK SO LONGGG IM SORRY U GUYS BUT I KINDA LIKE THIS SHOULD I MAKE A PT 2??? <333 YOU GUYS PLS READ THIS I THINK THIS MIGHT BE MY BEST WORKSSS!! also thing is i had dazai in mind for this but then i thought that it might be ooc so the character can be anyone!!

warnings : murder, stalking, suggestive writing, two psychos in love <33 (i do not condone these actions outside of fanfiction)

word count : 3.291K

(credit to @tookio for the dividers throughout the story!! lace one!! )

In the dimly lit streets of the city, where shadows, secrets, whispers and crime had all intertwined. You would have never ever even thought about the fact that you would have met him. Handsome was an understandment, but beneath all that charisma lies a man that you had met that fateful night.

You had simply seen him...everywhere. he was quiet the talk. his name was well-known. but by each passing day the paranoia increased. you had seen his smile, it was so perfect. god even you had a slight crush on the man, who wouldn't?

just like everyone else you had fantasies too, i mean his skin was so smooth...it'd be a perfect addition to you're collection. Out of everyone you had seen he simply had this charm you've never even noticed in others. why not indulge yourself in these weird fantasies? i mean sure you wouldn't be acting them out, so what harm right!

As a detective it was normal for you to get off work late, helping others and solving crimes. The pay was quite good in honesty, that's the only reason you sticked around.

nothing really interested you when you think about it, from a young age everything was all, blank. You really couldn't give a shit about anyone. You were only doing your job.

So when you stumbled across him as you entered the alley and heard the sound of something gushing, was that the sound of... stabbing? You never had thought you would've found him. murdering the man who had asked for your hand, you wouldn't blame him. he was an nuisance.

in the dim lights the eye contact between you two was tense, until you had sighed and raised an eyebrow as the words stumbled out.

"you seem like a busy man tonight, sir." you say unbothered at the sight as you continue observing him, he was wet with blood, obviously, you note. the smell was unbearable, so was the sight...he really did a number on him.

his eyes twinkle with amusement, a devilish smirk playing upon his lips. "Indeed, I am. But fear not, dear detective, I hold no ill intentions toward you." His voice was smooth as he reassured you.

you simply stare at him confused as you decide to do what's best, "That's...fine by me, sir. Have a good night dear stranger." you brush off as you wave goodbye to him and continue your merry way back home.

you weren't bothered...? oh how happy he was! with a grin spread across his face reaching his ears he watched you turn the other way and walk away. thank god! He had his eyes on you for sososo long!! You never knew how much he had wanted to possess you, to claim her as his own, even if it meant succumbing to the darkest corners of his soul! You saw him murder...yet you didn't even react? you could have done anything! gone to the police- ran away- or even decide to do something since you yourself were a detective! but no! you didn't! this means something right? you kept his secret! he knows you will! who else would you tell? this is perfect...that means you agree to be his! i mean c'mon- you didn't even care! he confirms your the one- only one!!! such a Fateful night, gosh!!

your figure gets smaller and smaller as he watched you with a giddy attitude, forgetting all about the body just by his foot...he had wanted to court you...he couldn't have that could he? he did this for you! and you didn't even care much about him! your the perfect one!!!

he always had a yearning to understand his soulmate...who dares to walk the same path as him yet stands on opposite sides of the moral divider. now? he's gotten his answer

As the days passed, the memory of him lingered in your thoughts, a persistent thorn in his otherwise impenetrable psyche. Intrigued by his motives and everything, you had found yourself drawn to his presence, craving the thrill of her company...this was bad.

One night you had no idea how it had happened. some bitch had been getting on your nerves. next second you find yourself in the same alleyway you and that man had met, as you continue stabbing the woman, her face was disformed, her organs were showing as the blood spurted out, god...it felt so right. The greed taking over as you took advantage of her drunk-like state. If her face wasn't disformed from the amount of struggle she put in, maybe you would have used her skin to experiment.

you now see why killing was such a thrill, simply from hearing it from others at your work, to looking for clues, even going to crime scenes and asking witnesses, to reading such books at night before bed, and witnessing that man do a gruesome sin so casually?? you had given up. all the pent up amount of anger and frustration showing up as you showed no mercy to the woman under you and you continue making the same motion.

up, down, squelch, up. up, squelch, down, up. up, squelch, down, actions that were considered psychotic and you were against all going down the drain- you were a detective goddammit! why was this happening?? god you just-

you stop all actions as your moments falter at the sound of footsteps. turning your head to the direction you found him, standing there with a smirk.

you chuckle and soften your eyes as you say "dear stranger, we meet again." you say as you observe him, this time it was you who was covered in blood, him a witness to your deepest desires.

he had always questioned whether his feelings towards you were love or obsession....whether you'd get to live or die was depended on what he had thought of you. yet, seeing you in this light made him question his own motives.

"Once again, fate brings us together," he murmured, his voice cold yet amused. "I see our paths are destined to cross repeatedly." From the corner of his eye, he noticed your hand gripping the weapon tightly, a mask of determination etched onto her face. "What brings you here, my dear detective?" He asked, curiosity mingled with a slight bit of excitement.

"ah business, my dear stranger." you commented as you eye him up and down, you didn't really know if it was in attraction or disgust really, everything was too foggy in your brain.

rights confused with wrongs, left and rights, north and south, west and east, god it was such a ecstatic feeling!

a faint smirk graced his lips as he studied his dear, the veneer of his composure never faltering. "Business, you say?" he questioned, raising an eyebrow. "And what kind of 'business' requires the taking of a life?" His gaze shifted to the dead woman on the ground.

you were like him!!! he was so happy!! imagine the dates you could have since you and him were alike!! he wonders if you'll kill for him too as he has for you, his dear spouse!!!

"The usual, now we've both caught each other doing this act of....sin haven't we?" you say warning reminding him oh his own crimes as you cautiously look at him for any reactions as you clutch your knife suspicious at his motive.

The gleam in his eyes intensified, acknowledging the truth in your statement. He let out a soft chuckle, a sinister sound that echoed through the alleyway. "so it seems we share a common bond, after all. you and I, the hunter's. It is a curious coincidence, indeed." Pausing briefly, he continued, "But our roles do not define us, my dear detective. Shall we exchange confessions, or shall we continue our separate journeys?" he asked with a smirk.

god you don't get it!! he's so nervous! he's itching to hold you! please say yes! he'll actually die and drag you with him if you say no!!

after a few moments of silence you break it with a simple, "Shall we have dinner at mine?" you ask as you tilt my head in curiosity of his response.

he raised an eyebrow at the unexpected invitation, but there was no denying the allure of its audacity. There was something about you that piqued his interest, a challenge he couldn't resist. "An intriguing proposition, detective," he replied, his voice smooth as silk. "I accept, under one condition. We shall share our darkest secrets over dinner, and I believe that you have tales worth hearing." With slow steps he walked towards you.

you have no idea what you do to him, your so perfect...he cant believe he had forgotten the ring at home. he'll make it up though, perhaps a night together? Would you enjoy that?

he walks towards you not to startle you as you stay put and clutch the knife by your side, once he reaches you he gently takes the knife out of your hand and holds it by his side,a small gesture to make sure you wouldn't stab him or the woman anymore. Speaking of, he continues observes the woman below the two. he knows your not dumb enough to leave evidence due to your experience, so he leaves it at that.

you speak up continuing the eye contact as you admit, "I don't have much stories, i can assure you that. This is my other darkest secret. The art of killing is quite fascinating, no? The motives, blood, shrill, everything." you sigh out in relief.

Oh? Quite amusing, no?

as you spoke, he observed you closely, noting the dreamy quality in your voice. There was a certain thrill in her words, a shared understanding that surprised him. "The art of killing..." he mused, a thoughtful expression crossing his face. "It is indeed a fascinating dance, a deadly waltz between life and death. But it is not merely the violence that captivates me; it is the web of motivations that drive individuals to such extremes. Tell me, what fuels your passion for it?" He asked, genuinely interested in her answer. he himself personally knew that beneath the surface of any killer, layered a story untold.

"My story..? I apologize but i'm not that quite fascinating. i simply wanted to feel the thrill and joy, i suppose that's what makes us different. Now dear stranger, care to have dinner with me tonight?" you remind him of the pervious offer as you start to get slightly impatient at the questions.

he nodded, accepting the change in direction of the conversation. "Very well, detective. Your reasons for your actions may not be as elaborate as mine, but they are yours nonetheless." he paused for a moment, considering her proposal. "Yes, I accept your invitation. Tonight it is." A sly smile tugged at the corners of his mouth, the anticipation of their meeting building within him. "Perhaps over dinner, we will uncover more about each other's motivations and the shadows that shape us." he says that more as a promise as the gaze in his eyes are tender yet filled with a look that makes you shiver...surprisingly.

you offer a hand for him, taking the offered hand, he felt the cool body temperature compared to his warmth.

His eyes flickered with surprise, but he hid it well. "You leave no trace, do you?" he remarked, his tone neutral. "a wise precaution, one that I respect." Turning to face you, he wrapped his free arm around her shoulders, guiding her through the dimly lit alleyway. "Now, let us embark on this adventure you speak of. to uncover the shadows that shape us, we must first delve into the darkness that binds us."

his arm slides down her shoulder and instead their fingers entwined, the two walked side by side, an unlikely duo drawn together like magnets...

"your skin is so smooth, i'd gladly use it as a use for my future experiment, but for now i shall continue doing research." you note to him as you walk hand in hand to your apartment, a new unlikely bond forming.

he smiles as he stays quiet as he observes you take out your keys, unlock the said door to your apartment, and let him go in first, he does so as he steps in a couple of steps as he comments "Your home reflects your nature, detective. Cluttered yet organized, a testament to your duality."

you lock the door as you step in with him and guide him to the small table, oddly enough you had two chairs across from each other with a small round table in between.

he sits as you gesture for him to sit as his eyes simply watch you, never taking them off you or your figure...this is a dream come true for him, dear. you have no idea of all the nights he's thought about this, a fantasy now a reality.

you start by assuring him "I don't plan on having your head, rest assure my dear. I simply wish to enjoy the warmth of a dinner."

he gets even more ecstatic but doesn't let it show as his lips quirk into a small smile.

"Warmth, indeed. An appropriate word for the evening, don't you think?" he comments as he puts his cheek in his palm which is resting on the table as he tilts his head and continues smiling at you.

warmth, warmth?

in the small moments of chatting and such while you prepare dinner for two as he observes you continue talking about exchanged stories- tales of their past, their motivations, and the darkness that haunted them.

you set down the plates on his and your side as you sit in your chair and begin eating, silence overtakes the two as you continue enjoying the warmth of another person and the food which isn't as bad as the one's from the other days.

you start by saying "now when we first met, did you know the man you had killed my dear? He was planning on courting me the next day...but you had killed him" you say wiping your lips with a napkin to ensure you didn't look improper infront of your new guest.

his moments falter then he hides it with a smirk as his gaze locking onto you. "a twist of fate, then," he said quietly, setting down the fork for a moment to take a sip of the water. "Your intended suitor, replaced by an unexpected encounter with me. A interesting meeting that led us here, sharing a meal and confessions. Quite poetic, don't you think?" He resumed eating, his expression the same. "yet, I wonder, why did you not reciprocate his feelings towards you? Was there something about him that displeased you?"

he asked, curious about her feelings toward the man he had intentionally kiled yet he masks it up with curiosity wanting to know more about his dear,

"He simply...wouldn't approve of my ideals." you say as you shrug your shoulders as you put down your fork and admire the man across from you, the lighting right above the table highlighting his features, his eyes downwards as he focuses on eating, his face looking charming as ever, and him.

he meets your eyes as he then says "Ideals are a tricky thing, aren't they? They can either bring people together or tear them apart. And in this case, it seems like your ideals kept you from that fateful engagement." He pondered for a moment, then added, "Tell me more about these ideals, detective. What drives you to walk this dark path?" He wanted to understand you better, to unravel the threads that made you...you!!

As they continued their meal, the conversation flowed effortlessly, each revelation painting a clearer picture of his dear sitting across from him.

with questions unanswered from your side, you get up as you collect both your and his empty dishes as you walk to the sink and rinse the plates with water before putting soap on a sponge and getting to work.

he watched you move gracefully about the kitchen, a mix of admiration and amusement playing across his features. "You have a peculiar charm, detective. one cannot help but be drawn in by you." He mused, leaning back in his chair. "but I must ask, will you always be the hunter, or do you ever allow yourself to be hunted?" His question was gentle, yet persistent, encouraging you to reveal another factor about your life.

you decide to indulge in his charm as you answer "i can be anything you want, my dear," you say as you continue scrubbing the dishes not bothering to turn back and look at him as you continue your work.

his eyes never move off your figure as he starts by saying "perhaps...there is more to discover within each other than just our dark interests, dearest."

He stood up, crossing the room to stand behind her. Placing a hand on her shoulder, he whispered softly into her ear, "And what of your fantasies, detective? Do share them with me, and I promise to fulfill them." His breath tickled her neck, a gentle reminder of his presence. The tension in the air thickened, their connection growing stronger with each passing moment.

you simply cherish his warmth compared to your coldness as you hum a tone enjoying the temporary- no forever moments between you two.

after a short while you say "our night that day i suppose was a fateful night, no?" you say moving for a bit turning off the faucet and then setting the plates. Afterword's, drying your hands then meeting his body against yours as you put your arms around his neck with a playful smirk.

he returned her smile, his own smirk matching her playfulness. "Yes, indeed, a fateful night-" he agreed yet interrupting himself, leaning in instead to brush a soft kiss against her lips. the kiss was a small one, simply enjoying the softness against lips as you seal an invisible oath.

he continues on "-One that will echo through our dreams and shape our reality. Your hands are clean now, but I fear, my dear detective, I may never wash off the stains of our shared past." He pulled her close, as if that was even possible as he and you enjoy the tenderness as his hand cups your cheek.

"in what way my dear? we have such a bond...our fondness could increase more, it'd be a shame if it went to waste." you say as you nuzzle closer to his hand on your cheek.

" I am merely a shadow, a whisper in the wind that brings forth change," he then plants a soft kiss at the softness of your neck below you jaw as he continues, "but for you? my dear, call me whatever you wish for tonight, i am yours just as if you are mine."

Their embrace lingered, filled with unspoken promises and desires. The air between them crackled with anticipation, a silent agreement to explore the boundaries of themselves to the fullest for eternity.

"care to spend the night, dear?" you ask, a simple question yet very obvious intentions.

knowing the answer yet he considered your invitation, his eyes never leaving yours. "I accept, under one condition: You allow me to learn everything about you, and share with me your deepest secrets." He whispered, his tone low and seductive. "only then can we truly merge our shadows, becoming one in the dance of darkness." His fingers tightened subtly, pulling her closer still despite the closeness.

"Then afterwords...do we forget about everything we had tonight? Or maybe...are you thinking of something else dear?" You ask hopefully as you push a strand of his hair behind his ear.

"Such forgetfulness does have its merits, but it would be foolish to discard the memories we create. Instead, let's keep them locked away in our hearts, to be revisited only for us." He leaned in, brushing his lips with yours as he continues holding your cheek tenderly.

This was more than mere attraction; it was a bond born of shared darkness and mutual understanding. He knew that this encounter would leave an indelible mark on them both, and he welcomed it. Their passion grew, fueled by secrets and desires, until they succumbed to the pull of the night, surrendering to the whims of fate and their own twisted dreams.

OMG YOU GUYS THIS IS ACC NOT BAD??!!! WOW IM BACK U GUYSS <3333

[mackjlee9]

Not sure if you already got an ask for this but

Leon and werewolf reader? 😱

How about... Vampire!leon x werewolf!reader also I have no idea what this genre is tbh

Vampire!Leon Kennedy x Werewolf!Male!Reader [?]

Masterlist.

Resident Evil

An unspoken rule had been established in this world. Each agency holds a specific type of creature to avoid conflicts, these agencies go out of their way to never meet up, only under impossible circumstances they could work together as one.

So no one is happy when they're squeezed together in the conference room under the President's command.

Everyone wondered how serious the situation had to be to have them mixed in a room like this, but not a single one of them could refuse the job, especially when they were under the President's orders.

Vampires and Werewolves were natural enemies, it was just how their instincts worked. Witches and Wizards had the same issue, they were similar, but so different as well. And here they were, vampires and wolves in the same room, breathing the same air, it was suffocating.

"I need everyone here to listen, this mission is essential for humanity's survival, and you have to work together on this," well, there was a reason by working under the President's orders meant neutral ground, no conflict should even exist under these conditions.

Everyone could work with anyone, and they had no right to refuse.

"Agent Kennedy, Agent (L/n)," both males watched how the president signaled for them to approach his seat. They stood on either side of him, while President Graham grabbed a pile of paper sheets next to a rather smaller one, and handed them to his bodyguards, "If you have a paper, you may leave."

(M/n) and Leon looked at each other for a moment, before watching how everyone left the room, only leaving them two with the president, both bodyguards standing by the closed double doors.

"Your abilities are needed, gentlemen," he stood up from his chair and reached to the whiteboard behind him, turning it around, and showing images of people and maps with paths marked. A close follow-up on times, when they arrived, when they left, and with who, "You have been paired on this mission because of your physical abilities, skills, fighting style, and solo efficiency," the president grabbed the smaller pile, only containing four sheets, two for each.

Everything they needed to know was there. They read silently, realizing that this job could turn out horribly wrong.

//////

Even if the mission was anything but smooth sailing, they had managed to get the first half of it done and were now heading to the next destination. But something was... Off.

They immediately realized that they had entered wizard territory, and they planned to immediately turn around and leave, but that wasn't something they could do anymore.

Their ankles had vines wrapped around them, preventing them from moving an inch, and soon, wizards of all kinds and elements began surrounding them. With gritted teeth, (M/n) raised his hands up, not wanting to shake the beehive any further, and Leon released his knife, doing the same as his wolf partner.

"Well... This is gonna be a problem."

And being chained to the walls, confined in a single room together was definitely a problem.

"That it was," (M/n) sighed and looked around the room for the thousandth time, never seeing anything different, never noticing any changes. Neither of them knew how long they'd been kept locked there, they would've tried to escape but they figured they will be fine soon... Hopefully.

Whether they had been there for hours, a few days, or a week, they didn't care, they had been trained to be able to survive these types of situations, but one was doing better than the other.

Every now and again, someone would toss them a bottle of water and a piece of bread, something that didn't work to give them energy or strength, but kept them somehow alive. The wizards knew what they were and were giving them things they knew wouldn't satiate their hunger.

And (M/n) noticed that he was holding better than Leon was, he was getting hungrier the longer it passed, but he was doing alright, but Leon? He kept licking his lips, his eyes had turned a bright red and he was avoiding eye contact, adding the fact that he had drowned that water bottle in an instant, looking still just as thirsty as ten seconds ago before he drank that bottle whole.

Even so, Leon was able to hold a small conversation with (M/n), although there wasn't much to talk about, and well, a little teasing to distract him wouldn't hurt, would it?

"So, is it true that a vampire's bite works as an aphrodisiac?" (M/n) asked with a smirk on his face, only making the blond scoff, looking into his (e/c) eyes with his once blue ones.

"Is it true that all male wolves have a knot on their cock?" Well, he wasn't expecting that question.

He cleared his throat for a moment, looking away, staring at the roof above their heads, feeling his face heating up a bit as he thought of a way to change the subject.

But the chain rattling behind Leon caught his attention. He looked down at him again, noticing how he had leaned forward, his pupils dilated and sweating quite a bit, his eyes fixated on him- on his neck.

(M/n) laughed and shifted on the floor, finding a more comfortable position as he observed Leon with amusement.

"Oh~?" (M/n)'s tone of voice made Leon snap back from his trance, huffing when he made eye contact with him, glancing away, but still able to hear the sound of his heartbeat speed up, "I thought us wolves always smelled like wet dogs, as those of you so kindly say, and it's not appetizing."

Well, Leon wasn't gonna tell him that he actually smelled kinda nice and didn't stink, otherwise, he would've commented on it after being locked in that room for however long it's been.

"Beggars can't be choosers," was all he responded, his jaw clenching right after when (M/n) laughed, his nose picking up the sweet scent of his blood, his eyes staring right where his pulse is, and the chains holding him back rattled again as he moved forward.

Leon tries to hold onto his sanity, but the way (M/n) continues to tease him about him being hungry, is making him mad. (M/n) feels in control, and he enjoys watching Leon slowly lose control over himself, but the feeling of superiority didn't last long.

With a loud grunt, Leon's arms shot forward, the chain breaking off the wall, hanging around his wrists as he launched himself to (M/n), keeping the wolf pinned against the wall, bearing his fangs at him, drool dripping down the corners of his lips.

Despite obviously being hungry and losing most of his self-control, Leon was still not latching onto his neck to drink his blood, and (M/n) could hear the sound Leon's nails made as they scratched the wall behind him.

"I don't wanna... Do something I... Might regret..." He mutters with gritted teeth and ragged breath, (M/n) looks into his red eyes, the crimson color covered by the black of his pupils and he sees the blond swallowing his saliva way too often.

He can smell Leon's desire, his hunger, and his need for him, for blood- for his blood.

Leon closes his eyes tight and groans when he hears (M/n)'s heart beating faster, his scent getting stronger.

Leon held his breath and slowly commanded his body to back away, but the small rattle of chains made him open his eyes. (M/n)'s neck was right in from of him, his nose almost gracing his pulse.

"I'm gonna rip your head off if you don't stop when I tell you to stop," his words were threatening, but his voice was so sweet and gentle that Leon almost couldn't understand what he had said.

He licked his lips, releasing a whine when his tongue touched (M/n)'s neck, his hands wrapping around the chains still holding the wolf captive just as a way to be able to ground himself. Leon took a deep breath through his mouth, almost moaning as he tasted (M/n)'s scent on his tongue. He dragged his tongue across his fangs and leaned closer, piercing through (M/n)'s sensitive skin, not caring about the pathetic whimper he released at the warm and sweet taste of his blood.

(M/n) frowned at the pain, but it wasn't anything he couldn't handle, and soon his body shivered, making him bite his lip to hold in the growl that wanted to escape. He felt his body on fire and the little nudge he felt of Leon's knee in between his thighs let him know why.

"So it... Does work as an... Aphrodisiac, eh?" He mumbled trying to make humor of the situation, but the way Leon continued drinking his blood wasn't helping, "Fuck- Leon..."

Tightly gripping the chains, Leon ripped them off the wall, hearing them hit the floor as he wrapped his arms around (M/n), straddling his hips and slowly retracting his fangs, licking the blood dripping from them. He leaned down to lick the blood around the wound, and he watched how it started healing by itself.

Of course, wolves have enhanced healing, he should've known.

He nuzzled in the crook of (M/n)'s neck, the wolf sighing and leaning against the wall, his hand lazily resting atop Leon's thighs.

Extended ending.

Hours later, the door was pulled open, revealing the unexpected sight of those two cuddled together. And the wizard looked up at her superior, wondering what she should do.

He sighed and signaled her to make a portal, it would be a way quicker way to get them out, they couldn't disobey the president's orders after.

"Send them away, Amelia." She nodded and started casting her spell, watching them being consumed by the purple portal.

As soon as they woke up, they realized they were outside. They weren't sure why or how, but the scroll floating in front of them told them what they needed to know.

"Well," (M/n) made eye contact with Leon, and he saw his cheeks pink, his eyes back to their pretty blue, shining under the sunlight, the sight almost left him breathless, especially when he saw Leon's shy smile, "We- we have s-stuff to do..."

They got up in complete silence, I didn't know vampires could blush...

"Leon..." He called the blond, turning toward him, and he looked at him with wide eyes, "Do you wanna... Go out sometime?"

Leon's giggle caught him off-guard, but a smile grew on (M/n)'s face when he saw him nodding.

[hanniebread]

what comes must go. yoon jeonghan

warnings. mentions of tuberculosis as well as terminal cancer, bittersweet sort of ending, kind of angsty and sad.

wc. 1.9k

an. i wrote this in thirty minutes while listening to radiohead so it's pretty meh, but i wanted to post it regardless lol. also i'm really nervous to put this out there because i've never actually published anything before so i genuinely have no clue if this is even worth posting or not... please try to enjoy regardless umm thats all

everything happens for a reason. over time jeonghan had grown to be painfully aware of that fact, being fed the phrase on a silver platter by his mother throughout his entire life. everything has it’s own purpose, and once it’s done serving it, it goes on to be something more important–something more solemn and dignified.

when a tree dies, it weeps sap before finally resting; though it’s slumber isn’t eternal, as it goes on to become a life source for those around it. some trees take on different purposes, falling to the ground to create a new path for living creatures that may wander towards it. a tree laying over a river to become a bridge is the same as a tree that spreads it’s roots into the ground to become a mother.

in fifth grade, jeonghan’s hamster died. his mother broke the news to him–though she didn’t tell him directly, making up some excuse about his pet going on an adventure to explore that of which he hadn’t had the opportunity to see while he was living in a cage. 

he figured out what really happen two years later, now being old enough to truly grasp the concept of death, though he didn’t shed any tears. jeonghan figured that since everything has a purpose, there must’ve been a reason behind his beloved pets death. there had to be an ulterior outcome, something that let to a happier ending instead of the despondency and disconsolateness you’d feel when envisioning death. it took him a while, but he’d forced himself to accept the fact that he’d never know the real reason, because what comes must go.

in eight grade, just before he’d be sent off to a prestigious high school, jeonghan fell ill with tuberculosis. everything he’d worked for, the education he’d craved throughout his entire life, had been stripped from his hands and thrown out the window with one examination. when the doctors informed him of this, he almost didn’t believe it. everything had gone so well for him, and he’d worked to keep it that way--yet when he reached his highest, he was dropped to his lowest within just a few seconds. 

he found himself unable to grasp the notion, though he knew it was more than that by now, it was his new reality. throughout the healing process, he found himself asking: was god punishing him for being happy? was this meant to happen? did this have a reason behind it? 

by the time jeonghan had become well enough to go home, he’d already missed his entire ninth grade year, shifting into the next without experiencing any of it. he’d recovered well, though he was still too weak to go off to the school he’d imagined himself in since he’d picked up a flier as a child, the school he’d earned the right to attend. he spent his days homeschooling from his bedroom, his eyes becoming droopy and devoid of any light they’d held previously. though he found it challenging to stay optimistic, he remained hopeful–because what comes must go. he knew his pain would leave him, and he knew there had to be a reason behind his suffering. everything happens for a reason. 

in twelfth grade, jeonghan had made a full recovery, and attended  his senior year at school in person. he found himself thinking back to the three years he’d spent by himself, and his chest swelled with gratitude; despite all of the damage it’d done in the moment, he realized that everything he’d gone through had built him into something stronger than he was before. when he was handed his diploma, he realized his mother was right. 

when jeonghan turned nineteen, he began attending harvard. he found himself surrounded by groups of amazing people, his mood almost never dropping–which was a huge contrast to how he’d behaved just years prior. he’d smiled wider than he knew was possible, and though he didn’t want to, in the moment he couldn’t help but remember: everything that comes must go. 

when jeonghan turned twenty, he met you. your presence felt like a breath of fresh air, something that made him forget about the past and the future, allowing him to just live in the moment. as he got to know you, he’d found himself appreciating things around him more than he realized was possible, cherishing every moment for what it was instead of thinking about what it’d be when it became nothing but a memory.

when jeonghan turned twenty-one, he fell for you. loving you came easy, becoming something he’d do subconsciously, almost as if devoting himself to you was as simple as breathing. he found himself behaving as if he was a teenage boy again, giggling at the mere thought of you. he brought you flowers, ones he didn’t even know existed until he’d gone on a tangent trying to find flowers that perfectly suited you, to which he decided were red carnations. 

confessing to you was nothing short of undemanding. he found himself telling you how he felt as if he was stating the obvious, as if it was something so undeniable and simple that you’d have no reason to question it. he spoke the words "i love you." in such a way that it was on par with "i'm alive right now." – something so matter-of-fact that it came straight from his heart and fell right out of his lips. when you’d accepted his feelings, and even returned them, he felt as if he’d just won the lottery. that day he decided he’d live life without worries, letting himself be happy no matter what. living would be easy for him, as long as he had you. 

when jeonghan turned twenty-two, you told him you had terminal cancer.

suddenly, the phrase he’d lived by made no sense to him. everything happens for a reason? that had to be a complete lie. he thought back to what he’d always told himself, ‘everything that comes must go’, and in the moment the phrase felt like a punch to a gut rather than a subconscious reminder. he didn't want you to go, he didn’t want it to happen–and instantaneously, he felt like a child again; like a child battling their own emotions, ones which they can’t control or understand. that day, jeonghan cried himself unconscious. 

it was nothing new that loving you came easy, but loving you on borrowed time felt more tortuous than enjoyable. he tried his best to ignore the fact that your light wouldn’t stay aflame for much longer, but the thought lingered in the back of his head with every glance he took. 

when you were hospitalized, jeonghan visited you every day. he spent every second he could by your side, talking to you, clinging on to the idea that maybe–just maybe you could hear him. he knew this day was approaching rapidly, he knew that you didn’t have much time left, yet every night when he left the hospital, he went home and prayed. he prayed harder than he ever had before, harder than when he attended church every weekend as a child, harder than he had when his mother told him that his father had gotten into a car crash, he prayed until his hands were sore and red from squeezing each other. 

the day before you died, jeonghan brought you red carnations. he’d always visited with flowers, which meant that your hospital room was nearly flooded with them; but he’d never had time to stop and get the ones he truly believed you deserved. anything other than this felt shallow and generic, but he couldn’t explain why. perhaps it was because carnations were the flowers he’d associated with you all this time, it’d become his way of expressing his love to you when you weren’t able to tell him you felt the same anymore. 

on the day that you died, jeonghan felt as if a piece of him had died along with you. nothing could put into words how it felt as he held your hands, which had slowly become cold; his eyes stinging as tears pooled in his eyes and fell on to your empty, unmoving chest.

jeonghan missed you so much it was unbearable. sometimes he’d be so overwhelmed with sadness and grief it felt as if he was going to die, his chest burning as he struggled to breathe. there was no way in hell that this happened for a reason. his mother was wrong, everyone was wrong, everything he lived by was wrong, and he felt so lost that it made him question if he should even seek out help anymore.

the first time jeonghan visited your grave, it was on his twenty-third birthday. he tried to enjoy the day with his friends, which had also been your friends at some point, but he found himself wanting nothing more than to spend the day with you, even if it meant he’d really be by himself. he felt more guilt than he’d imagined as he realized how long he’d waited to visit you, though he knew it wasn’t for the wrong reasons. as jeonghan sat next to your grave, he let himself cry again, the only thing comforting him being the thought that you were there with him. he knew that he had to accept your death eventually, and that nothing in this universe could bring you back, because everything that comes must go. 

that day, jeonghan brought you pink carnations. 

healing wasn’t an easy process, and it didn’t get easier as he progressed in life without you. when jeonghan turned twenty-four, he rented out his first house with a friend you both shared. he adopted a cat, cut his hair, and tried his best to become a new version of him. though it was hard, and he viewed it as nearly impossible, he didn’t give up. despite how cliche and foolish it may sound, he knew you wouldn’t have wanted him to. 

jeonghan knew he’d never think the same after you passed, and that proved to be true. he didn’t blame his mother, he’d never truly blame her, but he found himself so overwhelmed by his feelings that he didn’t know exactly who to point fingers at. in all honesty, if he opened his eyes, he knew that he’d find it to be nobodies fault. “some things just happen,” seungkwan had told him the day he’d cried to his best friend on the couch they’d bought together only recently, his chest heavy with guilt. “whether or not they happen for a reason doesn’t matter, what matters is that you make the best of the situation and enjoy what you have while you have it.” 

spring rolled around quickly. when jeonghan had moved into his new house, he’d noticed small buds of flowers by his window, resting unborn and full of potential as they stared at him, almost expectantly. he didn’t mind, because maybe they’d grow to be something beautiful, something full of life for as long as it’d be alive. maybe they were there for a reason, one he was yet to find out. the thought made a bud of hope blossom in his chest, one much like the dormant flowers sitting almost next to him.

a week later, they blossomed into white carnations; and jeonghan allowed himself to cry once more. he knew they’d close up eventually, retreating back into their shells as the seasons changed, but he found himself thinking: ‘maybe that’s okay. they’re here right now, and that’s all that matters.’

he didn’t let it trouble him, because what comes must go–and if he’s lucky enough, maybe it’ll come back around. 

[flightlessangelwings]

When it Comes to You...

Comandante Veracruz x fem!reader "cariño" Word count-3.1k Dialogue prompt- “ you need to get out of here! go! i’ll buy you some more time!“ Action prompt- [ REUNION ]: after spending a considerable length of time apart, the sender reunites with the receiver after saving their life from an immediate and potentially lethal threat. Warnings-s.mut (18+ ONLY!), rough s.e.x, protective!Veracruz, implied violence/minor character death, feelings, no use of y/n Notes- Of course I had to do a V fic for my Year of Protectiveness! @yearofcreation2023​ I've missed writing for my husband so much I can't believe it's been almost 6 months since my last V fic! But, I hope y'all enjoy the ongoing chronicles of V and cariño! @flightlessangelwings-updates​ is my update blog so feel free to also follow that and turn on post notifs to stay up of date on when I post!

~

You knew what you were getting into when you chose to be Comandante Veracruz’s girl. You knew you were safe with him, that he would protect you always. But, you also were aware of the dangers that came with being so close to a man like him. You knew that the traditional marriage, family, white picket fence life was not in the cards for you. And you were ok with that. Much like how you drew him in, there was something about Veracruz that you just couldn’t turn away from.

And that only made days like today all the more special to you.

Somehow, you managed to convince the comandante to spend the day at a local park with you. It was a beautiful day out, and you wanted to enjoy it… with him. You were shocked at how little convincing it took for him to join you. But what you didn’t realize was he agreed to go mostly to watch over you and keep you safe. At least, that was what he told himself was the reason.

Veracruz didn’t tell you this, but he had run into some trouble with rival arms dealers lately. And though he kept it buried, there was a fear that someone would use you as leverage against him. It was something Veracruz would not allow. No, he had to keep you safe no matter what. 

He wasn’t sure when it happened, but something grew within him when it came to you. It was more than sex, more than just a release. There was something that drew him back to you over and over again. And while he made it clear that he would never be the conventional relationship type of man, a part of him craved some sort of stability with you. He liked having you in his bed… in his arms… in his life. And if it meant a day resembling a date out in a park every once in a while, Veracruz could set his usual demeanor aside for the time being.

When did he get so soft when he came to you?

“Thank you, by the way,” your voice broke him out of his thoughts as the two of you wandered the park.

“For what?” Veracruz scoffed in an attempt to hide the mushy feeling that threatened to creep up on him.

Your smile was brother than the sun in the sky as you beamed at him, “For this,” you gestured vaguely, “For taking me out today.” You reached for him and placed a feather-light kiss on his cheek.

Veracruz’s eyes darted around as he suddenly had no response. He knew you knew better than to expect romance, but there were times, like this, where it came dangerously close. But, before he had to worry about it too much, a shadow in the distance caught his eye.

He grabbed your hand and yanked you close, “Stay at my side, cariño,” he mumbled, “We are not alone.”

You gasped, but hurried your steps as Veracruz eaves through the park in an attempt to outrun the sudden pursuers. He led you down a different path towards a more dense forest, and you followed without question. But, your path became blocked when four men popped out from behind the trees.

Veracruz cursed under his breath as he tried to backtrack, only to find that path was now blocked by even more men, all wearing black and carrying weapons. Your heart pounded in your chest as the fear quickly flowed through your veins. 

You were surrounded… trapped. 

“Out with your girl, Comandante?” one of the shady-looking men asked, “It’s a nice day for a picnic date,” he looked at you, “Hi there sweet girl.” 

“Who would have thought the mighty Comandante Veracruz turned so soft?” another spat as they closed in on you and Veracruz.

“If you are trying to catch me off guard, you will find that does not come easily,” the comandante kept his guard up and his body tensed. His hand hovered over his gun, and he kept you tucked behind him, making himself a human shield for you. He heard your rapid breaths behind him and he felt the way you clung to his shirt. He knew you tried to keep a brave face up for him, even in such danger. 

“V…” you breathed.

In a flash, Veracruz raised his gun and shot forward, catching your assailants off guard. As they scattered, he grabbed your hand and bolted away as fast as he could take you. Once the two of you ran a good distance, he ducked you both behind the cover of some bushes and pulled out his radio, signaling for backup.

Even in the middle of an ambush, Veracruz’s main priority was you. He had to keep you safe first and foremost, no matter what. And these men would pay for thinking they could use you against him. Veracruz was smarter than that. And he always took precautions.

“Listen to me cariño,” he grabbed your shoulders as he forced you to look at him, “You know what to do.” The fire in his eyes burned brightly.

You swallowed hard as the adrenaline pulsed through your system, “Yes,” you whispered.

“Good,” Veracruz gave you a squeeze. He thought over for a moment, and when he didn’t hear the approaching sound of footsteps, he leaned in and gave you a heated kiss on your lips, “Now, you need to get out of here,” he pushed you away from him and pulled out his gun once more, “Go!” he shouted over his shoulder, “I will buy you some time.”

Your eyes went wide as the last few moments felt like even more of a whirlwind. It took your mind a moment to catch up to what Veracruz was saying, and before you could say anything, you realized he already ran back towards the men who tried to attack you. Part of you wanted to stay, to help him somehow. But, Veracruz trusted you with his emergency plan in case anything like this ever happened. He trusted you to follow his command, knowing that he always had your best interest in mind.

So you had to trust him that he would be ok on his own until backup arrived. “Stay alive, V,” you whispered to his retreating figure before you turned and ran the other direction.

You ran for what felt like hours, knowing exactly where you were going. Veracruz always made it a point that you knew where you were and where to run to in case of an attack. Most days, you told him he was being overcautious. But, on a day like today, you were grateful to have your escape plan in place.

It was nightfall by the time you made it to your destination: an old, cheap motel in the middle of nowhere. No one would ever think to look for you here, and Veracruz made sure that there was always a room there to hide away in. 

Out of breath and drenched in sweat, you pulled the key out of your pocket and let yourself inside. Part of you hoped Veracruz finished off the attackers and made it back before you and he was here waiting for you. But, your hopes were quickly dashed when only a dark, empty room greeted you.

Letting out a heavy sigh, you locked and bolted the door behind you before you closed the drapes and made sure the room was secure. The comandante never spared any expense when it came to you, and he made sure to teach you well in case you were ever on your own. You let out another deep breath as you sat down on one of the chairs for a moment and rubbed your aching legs.

“Come back to me, V,” you prayed out loud as you took the opportunity to catch your breath.

But, with nothing but the clock ticking away the second to occupy your thoughts, the room felt lonely. So, you decided to take a quick shower and wash away the sweat and ache while you waited for him. Thankfully, Veracruz made sure to keep a bag of spare clothes, food and necessities stashed in the room so you wouldn’t be without. 

There was nothing else you could do right now anyway except for wait. And as much as you hated to just sit around, you made a promise to him, a promise to do exactly what he told you to do. And what he told you was to get here to this room and wait for him.

Hours dragged by slowly, but even as the sun set and the moon rose high in the night sky, you couldn’t sleep. You were plagued by the what ifs and the worst case scenario. You knew your comandante was more than capable of handling himself. You had seen it firsthand. But, you also couldn’t help but worry.

You never meant to get this involved in Comandante Veracruz’s life. He was supposed to be just a one night stand. Then he was supposed to be just a fuck buddy. But, somewhere along the way, your feelings for him grew into more. You couldn’t turn away from him even if you wanted to. He was the last person you should be with, and yet he was the only one you wanted.

There was no way you were going to say any of that out loud to him, though. Veracruz wasn’t about feelings. At least not in the traditional way. But, the way he always kept you safe, the way he always defended you, the way he fucked you… it all had to mean something… right?

Suddenly, a rattle at the door jolted you from your thoughts. You gasped softly as you jumped up to your feet and grabbed a nearby alarm clock from the table. You watched with bated breath as the door slowly clicked open and the knob turned. Without even thinking, you chucked the small alarm clock at the door before you yelped and ducked down.

The clock smashed against the doorway and you heard a string of Spanish curses from that same direction. You didn’t care to uncurl yourself until you recognized the voice.

“You missed, cariño,” Veracruz chuffed. 

You let out another gasp as you looked up and saw your beloved comandante in the doorway, “V… You made it,” you breathed in relief as you took in the sight of him.

Veracruz quickly locked the door before he met your gaze and let out a huff. His body was sore and tired from the fight and the journey, but just the sight of you was a relief to him, “Did you have any doubts?”

“Never, Comadnate,” you looked into his eyes with the first smile since the two of you were ambushed. 

The two of you stood in a tense silence for a long moment before Veracruz crossed the room, launching himself at you like a panther on the hunt. Fire burned in his eyes as he cupped your face with his large hands and crashed your lips together in a heated, passionate kiss. Sweat dripped down the side of his face and his normally slicked back and styled hair fell into his eyes in thick waves.

You didn’t care about the sweat and the grime and the blood and the messy hair as you parted your lips and invited him in. Clinging to Veracruz’s collar, you tilted your head and saw stars as you tasted him on your tongue. It ignited something within both of you, and you clawed at his shirt at the same time Veracuz backed you up against the dresser. 

Veracruz growled against your lips as he also tugged and yanked at your clothes, eager to get you naked for him. His cock twitched between your bodies as you gasped when you hit the dresser and found yourself pinned. 

“V…” you sighed in between kisses as you pushed yourself onto the dresser. The wood of the furniture almost felt cold with how hot your skin burned in your need for him. 

His eyes burned as he settled between your naked, parted legs. Veracruz purred your name as he hastily shoved his pants down so that he could feel your skin against his. And the spark of the bare touch ignited a blaze between the two of you that made goosebumps erupt all over both your bodies.

“You did good today, cariño,” the wall Veracruz kept around his heart cracked as he showered you with unexpected praise while he cupped your face. His thumb brushed a single quick stroke across your cheek that you would have missed had you not felt the intensity of the moment.

A heavy exhale escaped your lips as you felt like all the air was forced out of your body from the way your comandante looked at you, “Did you get ‘em, V?”

Veracruz’s face lit up in a wicked grin, “What do you think, cariño?” he answered your question with one of his own.

You wrapped your arms around his broad shoulders and pulled him close so that his chest collided with your own, your legs caging his body in against the dresser that you were propped up on, “I think…” you purred as you hovered your lips over his, “Nothing stands in the way of you, Comandante.”

He smirked as he tightened his grip on you, “Especially when it comes to you, cariño…”

Before you could react to the words Veracruz usually left unspoken, he crashed his lips against yours and swallowed any thought that would have popped into your mind. He hastily devoured you as his hands roamed all over your body… squeezing your breasts, your sides, your ass.

Heat rose in the room, making both of your bodies glisten with sweat, but neither of you cared. You moaned into Veracruz’s mouth as you bucked your hips against his in a desperate and wordless plea. But, he didn’t need words to know what you wanted. He knew you well enough… and you knew him.

Veracruz shifted himself so that the tip of his cock poked at your entrance, but he paused for a moment, giving you the chance to slow down. Normally, the comandante liked to take his time with you, teasing you and easing you open so that he would slam into you with abandon. But today, you both were too desperate, too needy, too impatient to wait.

“Please…” your voice was just a whisper, but it was all he needed.

The comandante thrust into you with a loud grunt, filling you to the brim in one swift stroke. You threw your head back and screamed loudly as his thick cock stretched you out. Your legs trembled on either side of his body while you dug your nails into his back hard enough to draw blood. But, it only fueled Veracruz more.

He grabbed onto your hips and pounded into you over and over again. The dresser knocked against the wall with every thrust of his hips, but he barely heard it over the beautiful sounds you made. Veracruz growled as he murmured indistinct words in Spanish and bit down on your shoulder to muffle his own groans.

“Fuck!” you cried out in pleasure. 

As he pounded into you, Veracruz looked up and caught a glimpse of himself in the mirror. He almost didn’t recognize himself between the disheveled hair and the burning inferno in his eyes. Your silhouette fit perfectly in his arms, and the heat from your bodies steamed the mirror. The comandante resembled a panther in the midst of a hunt, in the midst of protecting what is his.

“Mira, cariño,” Veracruz growled as he grabbed your scalp and forced you to arch your back so that you could see yourself in the mirror, “Look how delicious you are when you take my cock so well like this,” he gave his hips a harsher thrust so that he buried himself even deeper inside you. 

Your eyes were glazed over as you looked into the mirror. Drool dripped from the corner of your mouth and you saw you breasts bounce in your reflection as Veracruz continued to fuck you. But what took our breath away was the look on his face. The way his jaw clenched and his eyes burned. But, among the passions, there was something else in his eyes too. Perhaps it was fear… fear that he could lose you, that one day he can’t keep you safe from the threats that constantly loomed in the shadows. 

But those fears were quickly buried as Veracruz hit that sweet spot inside of you that made you scream even louder. Your eyes snapped shut as you felt your body tremble and your climax quickly approached.

“That’s it cariño,” he growled, “Cum for me.”

“V…” was all you managed to get out before your orgasm hit and you came hard, clenching your inner muscles around his cock as he thrust into you over and over again.

Veracruz watched as his cock disappear inside you and your warmth engulfed him, and it was only heightened when your climax hit and you cried out his name. Lost in the moment, he almost forgot about his own need for release until it snuck up on him. It was the first time in his life that ever happened. But, after a few more thrusts, Veracruz spilled himself inside you, riding out his own orgasm with your name on his lips. 

Heavy breaths filled the room as Veracruz leaned forward, resting his sweaty forehead on the mirror. You kept your arms around him, holding him just as tightly as he held you. His cock stayed buried inside you as he used the dresser to support himself. The heat in the room almost made holding each other uncomfortable, but neither of you cared. The room could be on fire and neither of you would let go of the other.

After several moments, Veracruz pushed himself up to look into your eyes, and he waited in silence for you to blink your own eyes open. Both of you stared in silence for several moments before he crashed his lips against yours in a heated, passionate kiss once more. 

The two of you went two more rounds in the shower and another in the bed before you finally collapsed down from pure exhaustion. You let out a deep, heavy breath as you curled yourself up in Veracruz’s arms and rested your head on his chest, listening to the pounding of his heart under your ear. You sighed contently as you closed your eyes and savored his warmth, his embrace, his own form of affection. 

Perhaps that was enough for you.

[nyctophiliq]

Ashe x Fem reader who is a new night shift employee for the Route 66 cafe. One night she wears a skirts that’s dangerously short and one of the other men get a little handsy. Ashe is having none of it.

Nw if this becomes a Drabble I’ll be so excited to see the other one shots you make! Also Ty for doings gods work, I speak on behalf of the lesbians: we love you 🫶

✮ — SEE YOU AGAIN ; elizabeth caledonia ashe

content warning ; afab reader. sfw ! — lowercase writing intended, reader being harassed, a bit suggestive just for plot reasons but nothing too too suggestive

wc ; 1,3 k

moss’ notes ; SORRY THAT THIS TOOK SO LONG there were just not sufficient ideas to fulfill this amazing req, so moss apologizes and hopes you see this anonie :) moss loves the lesbians too 💗

you worked at the diner on Route 66, a restaurant well out in the desert but still a popular place for locals to come around and have a bite. it was lively, with all kinds of people coming to eat, most of them going there after work or even just for fun. it was a nice change from being behind the register, where everything always smelled like food. it wasn’t your job to serve everyone, only take orders and deliver food when asked. it wasn’t easy, either, so the hours were long, which usually meant you didn’t get much sleep. your shift ended at 7 pm sharp, though, so you had plenty of time left before you would have to lock up and head home for some rest. you had spent a lot of sleepless nights lately, not sleeping because every time you closed your eyes you saw 

"hey, waitress- a coffee refill, pronto!" one of the savages shouted before turning back to his friends and laughing loudly, sharing snarky comments about you. there was not much you could do but pick up the coffee pot from behind the counter and walk to their table.

"anything else I can do for you, boys?" you gave them your best smile, taking a small, subtle step back to put some distance between you and the group. you did try, anyways. the customers never took anything seriously, but the one with the buzz cut was still staring at you. "uhm, yeah," he said, shifting slightly, putting his leg behind you to block your path, "just make sure my buddy here gets that coffee without spilling any on him." he grinned stupidly, his hand reaching across the table and his fingers going for the top of your thigh.

you swallowed thickly, nodding politely before tipping the glass pot and pouring the bitter black liquid into one of their mugs. his hand was moving to wrap or pinch your thigh and you normally let them play, it's silly to think more, you go home and sleep this off, men play smart with you all the time, not like it means something anyway. you picked up on seeing people flirt, especially after a few months at the diner now. they liked you because they thought you looked cute, or maybe they felt pity for the poor girl who was constantly trying to keep up with them. you preferred to think that you actually had more personality than that. and yet it happened every other night, these men coming in and harassing a desperate reaction out of you.

"leave her alone or I will be payin' a very special kind of attention to you." a tall, white-haired woman stepped to your side and placed her hand on your shoulder. she looked older, maybe mid-thirties, but definitely a woman that knew how to handle herself in a fight. she smiled warmly, giving her gaze from under her eyelashes toward the man holding you and letting her hand slip down to your hip. you flushed pink as your face got hotter, feeling your body tense at her sudden move. this woman is so cool, she's probably the most beautiful person you have ever seen, smiling nervously back at her as she began to rub circles on your hip with her thumb. you weren't used to such attention from women, not even women you'd dated.

the man scoffed, looking at his buddies before starting to laugh his fucking ass off. "or what, lady? you gonna paint our nails red hot like yours?" all of them started to laugh and the woman just sucked her teeth before whistling. a giant omnic appeared behind her, towering over all of you.

"you gonna be dealing with bob over here, he is heavy and knows I don't like my woman to be harassed."  she smiled wickedly, her hand sliding farther up on your hip until the tips of your breasts were pressed against her chest. you blushed harder, biting your lip and closing your eyes. it was just a play, to get those gross men to stop hitting on you, nothing more, you need to calm down.

the four-man looked at each other, laughing once again before the man with the buzz cut stood up, wiping his lips and giving a cocky smile to the woman. "okay lady, we get it, but sharing is caring, no? wonder how she would function on-"

"you are messing with deadlock property, boy." she cut him off, pushing a gun to his head, finger on the trigger, ready to pull it if needed.  you flinched as you noticed holding it close, using both of your bodies to make sure no one saw the gun, or even know it was there. it made you sick thinking about it. 

the man gulped before stepping aside and heading for the door. "it's alright, no need to hold a grudge, alright? we don't want to mess with the deadlock, okay? we were just going, excuse us... let's go gang!" he screamed like a little kid and they were out on the door within a blink of an eye.  you stared after them, wide-eyed, before lowering your hand from your hip and letting out a shaky breath. the woman laughed a bit, patting your cheek gently before grabbing you by the arm and leading you back to sit on a stool at the counter, ignoring your protests. 

"this is my number, don't be afraid to use it." she told you kindly as she scribbled onto your notepad she took whenever you were still in shock. she nodded, putting the stack of papers down on the counter and turned to go on her way.

"thank you... i'm y/n!" you started off quietly, but when it came to telling you her name you almost woke the dead of the desert around you. she turned around, a gentle smile plastering on her face before she brushes a longer white strand out of her face.

"the name's ashe."  she said with a small, sweet smile. she offered her hands to shake. you hesitantly grabbed hers, her hand feeling soft in comparison to how rough and dry yours were. "you call me if you are in trouble, any kind, alright sugar?"

"can i still call you if i am not in trouble?" you asked hesitantly, your eyes now staring past her form, trying to find something to focus on rather than that charming smile she is about to let pull on her lips.   she chuckled softly, squeezing your hand and releasing it quickly when she realized she was doing so.

"sure, I'll be waiting sweetheart" she winked at you as she slipped one of her hands into her pocket, the other tipping her hat before she could finally turn on her heels, throwing a couple of dollar bills on the table she was sitting at, you assume, and she left the diner with her friend named bob. 

your eyes sparkled as your fingers clutched the piece of paper now inside your apron's pocket, heart fluttering at the thought of seeing ashe again. you weren't even sure what you were gonna say into the phone once she picks up, but you were sure that you wanted to hear her voice once again, utter something like today. my woman...  you smiled softly as you headed back to the front of the diner, shaking your head lightly to clear it. tonight did not end up as planned, but at the very end of it you weren't complaining because you got to have her number and she was waiting for your call.

[artificialcorby]

Beware, spoilery content for MW3

I'm sitting at the counter of my kitchen, crying into my thoroughly weighed high protein / high carb (and low flavour) lunch bowl. And no, that's not the reason I'm crying.

Ever since I turned on my (back then) PS3 and started up this new first person shooter game called Modern Warfare, I felt a deep connection with this then mute character.

I was the F.N.G. The fucking new guy.

Long before I had the words (I only came out in 2019) I knew: That's me. That guy is more like me than any other protagonist I've ever played. Not much was known about Soap back then. And not much was known about me, the real me, either.

Fast forward to 2022. I am myself. More than I've ever been. And the ratings for the upcoming new MW2 are through the roof. I remember how much I loved the old games. I haven't played CoD in a while because the newer games weren't really for me anymore. Also life got in the way and you know how things are sometimes.

To kill some time until the release of MW2, I got a copy of the new MW (which totally went under my radar, because I was busy fighting therapists, health insurance, government agencies etc., not to mention the whole coming out) and was so happy when I saw a familiar face in the post credit scene: Soap.

I started to worry if the game would live up to the hype. But not only did it feel exactly like it felt back then. It felt even better. Mainly - for me - because it felt like picking up a part of myself I thought I'd lost. It felt like reclaiming a part of me that didn't quite feel like me back then (I suppose that doesn't make much sense to anyone but me).

Playing again as Soap reminded me of how far I've come. It was like reaching out to that younger person I was back in 2007, saying "see? this is who you're supposed to be. we made it".

Recently I've started to roleplay again. Spinning stories with other people, writing from the point of view of their favorite character. Writing as Soap, I want to make people happy. Because he is the ray of sunshine we all need.

And with the ending of the new MW3 we need it even more.

The point I'm trying to make is: I don't think people can ever overestimate how much fictional characters can mean to people. Sometimes they help us through tough phases of our lives, like a close friend. Sometimes they point out a strength in us we didn't know we had. And when they're gone, they leave a hole.

I now have to continue my way without Soap once again. Even though he will live on in the fandom. I'll still be roleplaying, writing stories, maybe putting together a proper cosplay.

In the past months, Soap brought me on a better path. I've started to workout again and to better take care of myself. Because life is now. I've even started to learn Gaelic just for the sake of it. Because I love languages.

I've always wanted to visit Scotland ever since I made my own money. Never did, sadly. Maybe that's something I'll do in the near future, too. Thanks to Soap.

That and getting a very funny tattoo to honour the memory, which I might reveal once I got it.

Of course my thanks go out to all the people who worked at the game. But a special thanks also goes to Neil, who brought our dear Soap to life. Who gave him a personality he didn't have back in 2007.

And who encouraged people to express their love for this character by sharing their work on his channel. Who even humoured us when it comes to the idea of a "less professional" relationship between Ghost and Soap.

Neil, you will never know how much this meant to us. You'll always be our Soap.

[thelittlearanarathatcould]

Today, Tomorrow, and All The Days To Come

Neuvillette, Thoma X female reader

Warnings -> Newlywed fluff

Neuvillette💧

A two piece rose gold band that fit your finger like a tiara, adorned with small diamond droplets underlining a large, tear shaped moonstone - that was what he chose as the symbol of his commitment to you.

With a woven basket in hand, a blue and white checkered cloth protecting its contents and delicious smells wafting into the air, you walked through Palais Mermonia on an invisible path well known to your heart. You greeted the staff members you passed by, and couldn’t help but be surprised when they returned your warm wishes and congratulated your recent ceremony.

Correction: the warm wishes and congratulations weren’t surprising; everyone working within Palais Mermonia has always been kind to you. The surprising part was that, unlike before, no one offered to escort you to Neuvillette’s office.

As if the gentle weight on your left ring finger meant that you earned their upmost trust.

A skip found it’s way into your step as you carried on, soon reaching the final stretch to your beloved’s office. “Good afternoon, Sedene.”

The Melusine looked up, her head just making it over the top of her desk. “Good afternoon, Milady.”

She said the new term so casually, you almost missed it. You didn’t, though, and it sent your heart jumping within the confines of your ribcage. “Milady?”

Sedene titled her head, the blue cap she wore managing to stay perfectly in place. Her violet eyes wavered with uncertainty, but her voice maintained a strong confidence. “Of course. You are Monsieur Neuvillette’s wife now, unless… Unless you would like to be called something else?”

To ease her worries, you smiled and shook your head. Your cheeks felt warm, and you hoped she wouldn’t be able to tell. “I don’t mind. I just wasn’t expecting it, that’s all.”

Her small shoulders dropped into a more relaxed position. “I see. In any case, are you here to see Monsieur Neuvillette? He hasn’t left for his break yet.”

“Ah, I’m glad I caught him in time.” You said, giving the basket a gentle tap. “May I go in?”

Sedene waved you off as if your question didn’t need to be answered. She returned to her duties and you approached the grand set of doors that separated you from the man you came to see.

Knocking with the knuckles on the back of your hand, you waited for that deep, silky voice to grant you entry. Though muffled, the sound of his voice ignited fireworks beneath your skin and the jitters of excitement moved through your body as you pushed the heavy door open with ease.

Like a mouse that finally found it’s cheese, you scurried across the rolling blue carpet and up the short steps to his desk, where your husband was organizing a pile of documents.

Neuvillette looked up, those violet-pink eyes of his catching the sunlight pouring in through the massive windows. The muscles in his face softened and the smile his lips curled into was so sweet you had to bite back a squeal, lest you risk embarrassing him at his place of work.

“Ma chérie, to what do I owe the pleasure?” He asked, rising from his chair and stepping around the desk to greet you properly.

“Do I need to reason to come spend your break with you?” You asked, standing on the tips of your toes so you could kiss his cheek. “I brought lunch for us.”

He chuckled and took hold of your hand, lifting it to his lips so he, too, could kiss you hello. “Your timing is as impeccable as ever.”

In no time at all, his desk was cleared and the lunch you made was laid out where his work had once been. The meal was simple: chicken soup with salad and a fresh bun from the bakery on the side. Naturally, you also brought bottles of water imported from Natlan to try.

Lowering the glass, you licked your lips and gathered your thoughts. Describing the taste of water was more your husband’s specialty than your own. “It tastes clear, somehow. Smoother. Maybe even a touch warm?”

Neuvillette chuckled and set his own glass down. “I suspect this water must have been collected from a source where warm rocks cover the river bed. An excellent find, mon amour.”

A lovesick giggle slipped past your lips and you leaned towards him, wanting to be closer. Your eyes happened to catch sight of the clock and, upon realizing it was almost the end of the hour, fought back a frown. You didn’t want to go yet; this was his first day back at work since returning from your honeymoon to Sumeru. But, as Chief Justice, Neuvillette had very important work to do and not even you could be selfish enough to keep him from that.

An entire nation relied on him to uphold justice, after all.

Forcing a smile, you reluctantly got up and started cleaning off the desk. “I should let you get back to it. I can only imagine how many cases have been postponed while you were away.”

Neuvillette stood and began to help. “Thank you for doing this. Your food is as delicious as ever.”

The compliment filled you with so much energy, your body did a little wiggle. “Just wait until you see what I cook up for dinner.”

The man chuckled and, now that everything had been returned to your basket, turned you to face him. Cupping your cheek in his palm, he leaned forward and placed a kiss between your brows. “I am looking forward to it. I will do everything in my power to return home on time.”

Home.

That word had taken a new meaning since you exchanged vows with him that beautiful day. Home wasn’t just a place you returned to at the end of the day; it was a loving space you now shared with the man you’ve come to love, and will love for the remainder of your life.

Warmth bloomed in your chest, and it reflected in your smile. “Yes. I’ll see you at home.”

Thoma 🔥

A gold band crafted specially to fit you, made unique with sculpted golden leaves, small shimmery sakura blossoms, and a soft pink stone blooming top and centre - on this, he swore his love for you.

The house was new but it’s felt like home since the day you moved in. The Kamisato siblings were kind enough to get the essentials ready while you and your husband were honeymooning in Mondstadt, but the smaller details, the things that made this (Y/N) and Thoma’s home, that was all left up to you and him.

Today, you were single-handedly starting the next phase of decorating. Together, you and Thoma had brought life to the kitchen and were slowly adding to the living room, but the hallway leading to the bed and bathrooms was still blank. What better way to welcome him home after his first day returning to work than a surprise revamp of the hallway and a hot dinner and dessert?

It went smoothly in your head, at least. In reality…

“Crap!” You exclaimed, arming yourself with oven mitts before diving in to rescue the muffins. “Please don’t be- Oh for Celestia’s sake.”

Dark as charcoal, and likely harder than coal. There was no saving them, even if you tried.

Letting out a sigh, you scrapped the muffins. Luckily, there was extra batter, you’d just have to make them a little smaller. Mini muffins were just as delicious.

Turning to the sink, you washed the muffin pan out and dried it. It was only when you turned back to grab the bowl of batter that you realized a naughty orange feline had leapt onto the counter and was eating the mix.

“Mango, get down!” You scolded, shooing him off.

As he always when caught doing something he shouldn’t, Mango fled, leaving a splattered trail of light grey paw prints in his wake.

Oh no.

Tossing the pan onto the counter you chased after the cat, hoping to catch him before-

You screeched to a halt in the living room, eyes widening and stomach dropping. Paw prints marked the couch, the tea table, the bookshelf he liked to nap in the empty spaces of. They marked the wall he often tried to scale to swat at the hanging plant and the windowsill he likes to lay in and sun bathe, and the floor…

A glance at the clock left you with no hope of getting everything cleaned up before Thoma got home. He should already be on his way - at the very least, you could catch the cat and clean him off before he made even more of a mess.

~~~

“I’m home!” Thoma’s voice filled the silent house, followed by the lock clicking back into place. “Honey?”

Knowing you couldn’t hide forever, you sheepishly waddled into the living room with Mango cradled in your arms like an infant. You found Thoma looking around the living room with wide eyes, taking in the state of the furniture before finally settling on you and the orange -mostly grey now- feline.

“It looks like you two had an adventure.” Thoma said, crossing the distance until he was close enough to touch your paint plastered cheek. “What happened here?”

Mango, no longer wishing to be held, twisted and wiggled until he was free. Not having the energy for another game of chase, you let him go. There wasn’t much else he could get to that wasn’t already dirty.

Sighing in defeat, you felt your shoulders drop as you spilled your ruined plans. “I wanted to paint the hallway to surprise you. I was also baking muffins, which I forgot about until I smelled them burning.”

“And there’s paint all over the house because…?”

You turned your gaze to the floor. “Because in my panic to try and save the muffins, I left the paint on the floor… and Mango walked through it.”

Thoma sighed quietly above you. “You…” Then he laughed, a sound that relieved the unnecessary anxiety building in your chest. “You are too cute.”

A smile pulled at your lips, and although you already knew the answer, you couldn’t help but ask. “You’re not mad?”

“What’s there to be mad about? It’s just paint. We can clean it up.” Cupping your face between his hands, Thoma trailed a line of kisses down your forehead and nose, ending with a peck to your lips. “What I am worried about, though, is you hurting yourself with the oven. Next time you’re making something, please stay in the kitchen, alright?”

“Okay.” You giggled, bouncing on the balls of your feet. “One more kiss.”

Chuckling, he leaned over and gave what you asked for. “Help me catch our little troublemaker and I’ll give you another one. How does that sound?”

At its core, the love you shared with Thoma remained the same, regardless of what title the relationship was labeled. Boyfriend and girlfriend, husband and wife, no matter what, the man before you was still yours. The ring wrapped around his finger just made it known to the rest of the world.

“Oh!” You exclaimed, catching hold of his jacket before he could chase after the furry gremlin. “I didn’t say it earlier. Welcome home, my love.”

The sun was setting outside but the brightness of his smile made up for it, the pink rising to his cheeks a rival to the sky above. “I’m glad to be back.”

[andreafmn]

Kinktober ⛓️ Day 11

Word Count: 2.9K Paring: Paul Lahote x Human!Fem!Reader Prompt @kinktober2023: Sensory Deprivation WARNINGS: SMUT 18+ (minors DNI), oral (female receiving), sensory deprivation (handcuffs, earplugs, blindfold), fingering, p-in-v sex, unprotected sex

Summary: Paul Lahote has always had trouble trusting and letting other trust him. Parts of his past have left him doubtful and uncertain of everything, even (Y/N)'s feelings for him. No matter what she says or does, he believes they are only the result of the supernatural ties that bonds them. But she will do anything to make him understand otherwise.

A/N: First Paul fic of the season, many more to come 😉😉 also, yes, I am behind schedule... are we surprised? 😅😅

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Trust was not something that came easily to Paul Lahote. Not giving it or receiving it. The very people that he should have believed in the most were the first to break it, and it had done nothing for any of his future relationships. 

After shifting, it only got worse. He was forced to lean on his brothers in the pack. They required mutual trust to ensure everything ran smoothly between them. He couldn’t help but trust them. There was no other path he could take. 

But imprinting on (Y/N) brought on a level of uncertainty he had never thought possible. He had been lucky enough that she shared his feelings once he confessed everything he was and everything the bond meant. Yet, he’d felt that way about her before the shift, and he couldn’t help but wonder if her feelings were because of the supernatural link that tied them together. Even if she told him many times that the way she felt about him had nothing to do with the imprint bond, a part of him always wondered. 

(Y/N) was nothing if not determined, though. She would get Paul to understand that her feelings ran deeper than a supernatural tie, that the universe has brought them together for a reason, even if he didn’t believe it to be so. 

Truth was, she’d had feelings for him long before they even said a word to each other. When walking down the halls of their school, she wondered what it would be like to be the girl under his arm and not just another student he nodded to as he walked to class. At that time, she didn’t know that he harbored the same thoughts but always believed she was too good to be with someone like him. 

But long gone were the high school days, and the fates had decided that their lives should cross. Even if Paul questioned the why every day of his life, (Y/N) knew they were meant for each other. And she planned to show him just how much she thought so. 

“Can’t you just tell me what we’re doing?” Paul chuckled as (Y/N) led him up the stairs of her home. “You’ve been so secretive about tonight.”

“I told you that it’s your anniversary present,” she responded. “Now, stop dragging and get in the room.”

Behind the closed door, Paul saw a plethora of candles lit around her room, basking the area in a warm light. On the bed, a small back box with a bow around it rested, waiting for him to open it. “Is that for me?” he questioned. “The black box?” 

“It is,” she smirked. “Check what’s inside.”

With a confused look, Paul reached for the box, untying the white ribbon around it and letting it fall onto the floor as he lifted the lid to the box. His stare turned amused as he pulled item after item from the container, unsure of what it meant. He pulled out leather handcuffs, a silk blindfold, and small foam earplugs. 

“What’s this?” 

(Y/N) crossed the room, closing the door behind her and taking Paul’s hands into hers. “I want you to know that I trust you completely, baby,” she said. “I trust with my mind, my body, and my soul. Tonight, I want to give you all of my senses. I want to let you know that there is not a single drop of doubt in my body that what we have was always supposed to happen.” 

“(Y/N)… I-I don’t think I can.”

“Please, Paul. I need you to take this leap of faith with me,” she pleaded, resting a hand on his cheek. “I need you to trust yourself and trust us as much as I do.”

“I do trust you, baby. Of course, I do,” he sighed. “But I don’t trust myself. I’ve never been able to.”

“Then let me show you how,” she whispered. “Trust yourself with me. Trust yourself with my body because I do. If you don’t believe yourself, then believe me.”

Paul kissed her tenderly, taking her jaw in his hand. Her lips were warm and expectant, and as loving as the first time they had kissed. He caressed her skin and cradled her body, pulling her body to his. 

He did want to believe in himself, believe that the universe did think they were the perfect match. But where she was calm, he was explosive. Where she was kind, he was sarcastic. Where she was caring, he was stubborn. How could he trust that someone didn’t make a mistake along the way?

But at that moment, he knew he had to trust her. He had to because she was trusting him. And he kissed her to let her know that. His hands reached behind her back as he unzipped her dress, pulling the straps gently from her before allowing the fabric to pool at her ankles. 

As they parted to remove Paul’s shirt, (Y/N) took the blindfold and placed it in his hands. He stared at the piece of fabric as she placed the air plugs and the cuffs on top, smiling at him as if he had placed the stars in the sky. 

“Do it,” she said. “I trust you, Paul. You’ll take my sight, my hearing, and my touch. You’ll have it all in your hands to do as you please. Mind, body, and soul, baby.”

With another chaste kiss to her lips, Paul started by taking her sight, slipping the silk over her eyes. He tied the blindfold behind her head. He led her to the bed, still dressed in her black lace underwear, where he clasped her arms to the headboard. “I love you,” he said as he slipped one plug into her ear. “More than you’ll ever know.”

“And I love you,” she responded as he placed the other. “More than you’ll ever believe.”

It was exhilarating to not have her senses. Everything made her sensitive. The gentle breeze that came in through her window made her skin erupt in goosebumps. Every slight movement from anything around her made her jump. And the anticipation made her drenched with desire. 

But Paul couldn’t help the nervousness that took him over as he heard her heart hammering in her chest. It was running like it wanted to crawl out of her skin, and it made him question just how much she truly wanted that moment. 

Trust. That’s what it was all about. He needed to trust what (Y/N) said. Needed to trust the love and care she had put into their relationship. It was time that he believed the words she said and not the thoughts that clouded his head. 

He took it slow at first. He caressed her skin, reveling in the way her body arched toward his touch. His hands traveled the expanse of her body, from her face to her legs, mapping every inch in sight. Paul kissed her softly on the lips, beginning a trail of kisses down her body. From her cheek to her jaw, from the spot on her neck that made her moan to the swell of her breasts that made her mewl. 

Paul’s tongue left a trail of wetness across her body as she panted. Cutting off her senses made her more sensitive than he’d ever thought possible. Simple caresses and kisses made her keen in pleasure, her body arching to where the touch came from. It made his cock press against the seam of his jeans, hearing her moan because of him. 

In a swift rip, he removed her underwear, leaving her exposed under the light of the moon. Her legs pressed together in an attempt of modesty, but Paul spread them before she could hide her weeping wetness. 

“You should know you owe me a pair of underwear now,” she said rather loudly, but all Paul could do was laugh, knowing she could not hear an answer. “That was my favorite matching set, just so you know.” 

Something came over him then as he came face to face with her wet cunt. An animalistic urge to dive into her and claim her as his own. He wanted his ears to fill with her pretty sounds, wanted her legs to close around his head as she wailed in pleasure because of his tongue, wanted her to beg him to fuck her like never before. Her entire body was on display and under his control. She was his, from now until forever. 

He kissed his way up her legs, sinking his teeth softly into her skin and licking the pain away after. He trailed her limbs until his mouth fell on her core, licking from her folds to her clit, spreading her and tasting her like never before. He closed his lips around the small bundle of nerves, sucking in his cheeks as his tongue caressed the mound. 

(Y/N)’s breath hitched in her throat at the contact, her hands trying to snake their way into his hair but being held back by the restraints. Her chest heaved as Paul attacked her sex, moving his tongue expertly around her clit. She could feel him expertly twisting it around her, lighting a fire deep inside her stomach. Unconsciously, (Y/N) tried to close her legs again as pleasure traveled across her body, but with very little force, Paul kept them open. One hand on her leg, the other kneading her breasts and pulling at her nipples. It was overstimulation at its finest. And not being able to see him or hear how loud she was being, or even touch him made her that much more aroused. 

But Paul wasn’t satisfied with only that. As she screamed out his name the second her first organs hit her, he slid two of his fingers into her cunt, scissoring the digits as her walls contracted against them. He could hear the rattling of the cuffs’ chains as she tried to stop the assault, but it only worked to make him smirk and keep going. 

His tongue was aided by his fingers as he licked, sucked, nipped, and pistoned, making (Y/N) wail his name into the quietness of the house. Just like he wanted. He wanted everyone to know just how good he was making her feel. Wanted them to know how much she did trust him, that she had relinquished control of her body to him willingly and lovingly. She wanted him just as much as he wanted her. They were one. Mind, body, and soul, they were meant for each other. Paul knew what (Y/N) needed without her having to say a word or even move a muscle, and he had to believe it. 

With another finger inside her, (Y/N) felt stretched. But she knew that wasn’t the most her cunt would take. By the end of the night, she’d be sore and tired but completely satisfied. She knew Paul would see to it. And by how it was already going, she knew just how she’d be left trembling and satiated, and with a newfound trust between them. All because of a pair of handcuffs and a blindfold. 

Paul remained buried between her legs until they closed on either side of his head as she moaned out his name loud enough for her voice to carry to the Young cabin. With a satisfied chuckle, he cleaned his mouth before placing his hand over her lips, prompting her to let his fingers into her mouth. He moaned as he gazed at her tasting herself on him, a mix of wanting her tongue around his cock instead and watching her moan out at her own taste. 

With his free hand, Paul untucked his cock from his pants, stroking himself as she feasted on his fingers, taking them in as if it was him buried deep inside her mouth. He spread his precum along his lengths, groaning at the sensitivity of his member. He wanted to make the night last. Wanted to prove to her that handing over control of her body had been the best decision she could have made. But all he wanted was to be immersed in her warmth, covered by her fluttering walls and her glistening essence. He wanted her to know how hard she was making him, how in love with her he was. 

Begrudgingly, he took his fingers out of her mouth, her lips making a popping sound as the digits exited. He slipped his pants alongside his underwear down his legs, tossing them at a corner of the room. His erection stood proudly in front of him as he climbed over her in bed, towering over her body as he trailed it with his mouth once more. 

He grabbed his shaft with his hand, stroking the head against her floss, spreading her only slightly but not entering her yet. He crossed from her entrance to her clit, running back and forth on the outside. 

“Stop teasing, baby,” she dead breathily. “You’ve done enough teasing for the night.” 

Once more, Paul chuckled in response, knowing she would not hear a word he said. He kissed her lips then, using her gasp from spreading her with his cock to slip his tongue into her mouth. She tasted of her own juices, making him groan into her mouth, and her hands to struggle against the restraints. 

“Move already, baby,” she groaned against his lips. “Please.” 

How could he not when she was begging so deliciously? Her legs crossed around him as Paul finally entered her completely, thrusting slowly as her body got used to his size. The initial stinging always made her wince, but it wasn’t long until the sound was replaced with a pleasure-full moan. It was a tango they had perfected over time, adding and removing steps as they saw for. But the choreography always ended with both of them pleasantly satisfied. 

(Y/N) didn’t want to wait, though. Her legs pushed Paul’s hips into her at a faster speed. Though it was not fast enough yet. There was only so much she could do with her limbs. 

Her skin felt like it was on fire. Her desire to run her hands across his skin, to draw into him lines of love and pleasure that only she would remember were there, was enormous. Every time she felt the urge to do so, the throbbing of the leather against her wrists reminded her that she could not. If she wanted to touch Paul, he would have to decide so. Only he could touch her. Only he could give her all that she desired. 

“Faster,” (Y/N) mewled. “Faster, Paul.” 

And that’s what he did. His hips resounded against her ass in a thunderous clap as he thrust into her at the tempo he knew she wanted. The slickness of her insides mixed with the slapping of their skin made him grow feral. He moved in a way only he knew how, hitting the spots that made her cry out in pleasure. 

“More!” she cried. “I’m close, baby. Give me more!” 

Paul couldn’t deny her request. He had already rested on her like she was her essence of life and had taken her body for himself. If she wanted to cum, he would make sure that she did. His hand reached between them to find her clit, twisting it between his fingers as he angled his cock to the spot he knew would have her bursting around him. 

Between his hand and his cock, there was no way (Y/N) could last much longer. It only took a couple of minutes more for her to come undone around him. Her back arched off the bed as she came with him, her arms held back as she cried out his name in pleasure. The only way she could get him closer was by wrapping her legs tighter around him, keeping him inside as their ends mixed inside her, filling her until she spilled around him. 

As their orgasms ran through their bodies, Paul slid out of her slowly, gasping silently as their essences spilled out of her onto the bed. He then took off her earplugs, followed by the blindfold and the cuffs, kissing the redness that had formed on her wrists. 

Finally free of her restraints, (Y/N)’s hands cradled Paul’s cheeks to bring him in for a passionate kiss, the need to touch him at an all-time high. She ran her hands all over his exposed skin, making up for the time she could not. 

“Tell me,” he said breathlessly as he parted from her red lips. “How did it feel?” 

“Why tell you when I can show you?” (Y/N) smiled devilishly. “This is an exercise of trust, and trust goes both ways, baby.” 

“You want me to wear the blindfold?” Paul asked, his cock already hardening at the idea.

“It looks like you like the idea,” she grinned. “I gave you everything that I am, Paul. Now it’s your turn.” 

After only a second of silence, Paul smiled and gave her another kiss, pulling her toward him until she was straddling his lap, their chest pressed tightly together. “Okay,” he said breathlessly, his eyes trained deeply on hers. “Mind, body, and soul, right?” 

“Mind, body, and soul,” she repeated. “Now, ready for round two?”

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[minastras]

iv. if i give my heart to you

prev • masterlist • next

words: 4.8k

warnings: swearing, underage drinking

——————————

The second you reached home you rushed to your room and shut the door, letting out a quiet, choked sob. You allotted twenty minutes for being miserable away from prying eyes, sitting on the floor with your back to the door and your head in your hands.

You’d read a Richard Siken quote a while back about sliding down a wall crying but only being able to focus on the wall in front of you and how you didn’t paint it all that well. That was you now, as you stared and stared and realised one of your power outlets was crooked. There was something so pathetically sad about hiding your tears when there was no one around to see you cry.

The next day, you told your friends you and Kai broke up. You didn’t give them any more details than that, lest your two stories contradicted each other again.

Aeri and Yizhuo tried their best to comfort you (and you appreciated it) but they couldn’t, not really. Not unless they knew the real reason you were upset. Kai hadn’t “broken your heart”; you’d gotten invested in something knowing it was fake. You were drowning in quicksand you’d willingly jumped into, and you had no one to blame but yourself.

Over the next week you and Kai stayed out of each other’s way. His friends gave you such pity-filled glances whenever you crossed paths that you felt compelled to tell them you were fine each time. Obviously, that was a big fat lie.

Daeseong and Daehyun asked about Kai only once, because the second they mentioned his name you’d burst into tears. They both got so scared they started crying too. You had never cried in front of them in your life.

“I’m cancelling my party next week,” Aeri told you after class. “Yizhuo and I’ll come over and we can hang out.”

“You don’t have to do that,” you shook your head. “Have the party. I know you’ve been excited about it for ages.” She’d recently gotten a pool table and wanted to show it off. You weren’t going to deny her that chance, especially not to just make her join your daily moping sessions.

“Fine, but you don’t have to come,” she acquiesced. She knew you well enough to know you hated pity, and that when you said things you meant them.

“No, I’ll go. It’ll help me take my mind off things,” you said, smiling and poking her cheek. “Anyway, I need to be there to keep you and Yizhuo in check.”

——————————

——————————

Empty bleachers haunted Kai at every practice, but he still looked forward to training. It helped to keep his mind off of you. For a while at least.

After he ended his fake relationship with you, there had been no teasing, ribbing, or I told you so remarks from any of his friends. Not even Beomgyu. How visibly torn up must Kai have been to elicit such unbridled sympathy? He hated thinking about it, the fact that other people knew the strength of his emotions.

Practice ended, and once again a dull ache crept its way back into his heart and settled in, making itself at home as it had for the last week.

Soobin cleared his throat and pointed over Kai’s shoulder. “Someone’s here for you,” he said.

His heart started racing. It was you. You were here to give him another chance to apologise. But then he turned around and saw your friend Yizhuo, standing at the bottom of the bleachers with her arms crossed, staring daggers right at him. He excused himself from the group and made his way over to her.

“Hi, Yi-”

She held up a hand, not in the mood for pleasantries. “I’m not here to be a messenger between you and Y/N. I’m also not here to beg you to take them back,” she started, narrowing her eyes. “They didn’t send me here, but you probably already knew that.”

He did; you weren’t the sort of person to pull such stunts. That’s what really hurt, that you didn’t want to talk to him at all.

“I don’t know what happened between you two, and frankly I don’t care. But I do know that you left them with the impression you don’t care about them,” she continued. You thought he didn’t care about you?

“Whether you guys get back together is none of my business. I just hope you’ll show them they mattered to you and give them closure instead of running away,” she said, before pivoting on her heel and leaving.

Kai sat at his desk that night, unmoving, as if the right path of action would come to him if he stared at his wall collage for long enough. Even Yizhuo knew he was a child, incapable of having important conversations, incapable of real relationships.

He pulled the polaroid of you and him after his championship game off the wall — the one you’d asked for but he refused to give up. He could still remember the feeling of your hands on his face when you kissed him, your palms cool in comparison to his skin flushed from the exertion of the game.

His friends teased him relentlessly over this photo and the way he stared at you in it, saying he was happier at the kiss than their championship win.

He set the picture down on his desk and reached for his phone. He had something he needed to say.

——————————

Did you regret attending Aeri’s party? Maybe. But you couldn’t back out now, and you didn’t want her to worry about you.

While Aeri shepherded the earliest guests down to the basement to see her new pool table and Yizhuo greeted people at the door, you were in the kitchen making a gigantic bowl of your signature sparkling strawberry vodka punch.

It gave you something to do, at least, that didn’t necessitate being out in the living room where the rest of the party was. Talking to one or two people when they popped into the kitchen for a drink was a hell of a lot easier than doing that.

There was no way Kai would turn up, you kept telling yourself, trying to be normal.

You repeated that again when you finally left the kitchen and saw Yeonjun and Soobin walk through the front door.

And again when you were talking to Jongseong in the backyard and spotted Beomgyu and Taehyun walking up the driveway.

Jongseong was trying to assess you — to figure out if he could flirt with you or if you were still upset about Kai — and in the back of your mind you knew that. You answered that question for him when you locked eyes with Kai through the open back patio door. He looked away, a see-through cup of your punch in his hand.

Jongseong turned around as your mask of friendly bubbliness slipped off in an instant and shattered all over the grass beneath your feet.

“Yeah, I figured you’d still be hung up on him,” Jongseong said, sounding mildly disappointed. How long had Kai been watching you? When did he even get here?

“Mm, I guess so,” you shrugged, pushing your entertainer smile back onto your face. But you weren’t fooling anyone, not anymore.

“It’s fine, Y/N. I get it,” Jongseong chuckled, taking a step back to indicate he wasn’t going to pursue you further. “Now’s a bad time. I hope things work out, whether you guys get back together or not.”

You relaxed considerably, scrambling for the shards of your mask as you tried to smile back. “Thanks, Jongseong. I’ll be in the house if you need me,” you said, excusing yourself.

When you returned to the living room Kai was nowhere to be found. You headed straight for the stairs and up to the guest room, leaving the door unlocked behind you as you entered.

If there was anything you were jealous of in Aeri and Yizhuo’s houses, it was the balconies. What you would give to have one of your own. From up here, the sounds of the party seemed so far away. The night Kai had asked you to fake date him on this very balcony, exactly one hundred days ago, seemed equally distant.

It was a cold night, but not unbearably so as long as the air was still. The sky was clear but too polluted for visible stars. You propped your feet up against the edge of the balcony and leaned over the railing, looking up at the deep indigo anyway.

“Don’t do that. It’s dangerous,” came a familiar voice. You stepped back down and turned around, watching Kai shut the door behind him.

You closed your eyes tightly and turned away, back to the view from the balcony, and held your breath.

“You left the door unlocked for me, right? You were hoping I’d follow you, right?” he asked, sounding almost desperate for his assumptions to be true.

And they were. You told him as much when you sighed softly and once again turned around to face him.

He was wearing his student athlete jacket that you loved, a black and gold varsity-style jacket with ‘Kai’ embroidered in small gold letters on the front. You borrowed it sometimes, because it was soft, warm, and smelt like him. Selfishly, you wondered if he wore it hoping to run into you.

“Kai-”

“I’m sorry. Please, hear me out.”

It was too cold to be out on the balcony. You walked back inside, closed the sliding door behind you, and sat down on the end of the neatly made bed. He sat down beside you, hands fidgeting nervously in his lap.

If someone had asked you what you were anticipating from this conversation, you wouldn’t have been able to give them an answer to save your life. No, your head was filled only with him — how sad his eyes looked and how much you wanted to hug him. There was no room in your mind for speculation.

“The other day when I told you I wanted to end things, I was lying,” Kai began, pausing after every other word, choosing them carefully. He wasn’t looking at you while he spoke, his eyes locked low on the wall in front of him. On a power outlet.

“I actually wrote a whole thing out on my phone — that’s what I was looking at — but I didn’t read it out because I was being a coward,” he continued. “Can I read it to you now?”

There was a block in your vocal cords preventing you from speaking. All you could do was nod and watch him pull out his phone. He turned to face you, and each time he glanced up from his phone at you while he read, his eyes seemed to get shinier.

“You were right, it was real. All of it. I avoided thinking about us until you brought it up because I’m immature, I’m childish, and I don’t like thinking about the serious stuff. What people say about me is true, and I was terrified by how much I like you. I chose to act as if everything was fine, and that wasn’t fair to you.

“I’m sorry I hurt you, and that I made you feel like you didn’t matter to me. That was the last thing I wanted to do, because you’re my favourite person. I like everything about you. You just get me, and I never have to pretend around you. I want to be your boyfriend, your actual boyfriend, and I promise I’ll grow up for you. If you’d have me.”

He cleared his throat awkwardly and pocketed his phone, fidgeting with his hair like he always did when he was nervous. You watched him, biting the inside of your cheek, the ambient noise of the party downstairs crackling in the background.

“I- I meant to say all that a long time ago,” he said, trying to hold eye contact with you but breaking it constantly. His hands rested uncomfortably on his knees, like he didn’t know what to do with them.

“Do you still mean it?” you asked. “All of it?”

“Yeah, I do,” he nodded, before sighing and pushing his hands through his hair again. “I just- you know me. I can’t commit to people. I’m the last of my friends to grow up.”

Huening Kai: the master of puppy love and nothing more. Or so people used to say. But there were other types of love aside from romance, and you’d always known he was capable of those. The guest bedroom was painfully quiet, enough so that you could hear him breathing.

“You keep saying that, but I don’t think it’s true,” you said.

“You’re right: it’s Beomgyu,” he agreed, giggling nervously. It had been too long since you last heard him laugh. You smiled at his cautious joke, which appeared to reassure him slightly.

“I’m sorry too. I shouldn’t have let it get this far. I should’ve talked to you earlier,” you mumbled. Your initial outburst must have come out of nowhere for him. The embarrassment of your past actions hit you, delayed, but you pushed it aside and soldiered on. “Can- can we try this again? I don’t want to live with regrets.”

You had barely finished getting out your last word when Kai leaned forward and kissed your cheek, urgent yet hesitant, eager yet tentative. He was beaming as he reached for your hands and held them in his.

“Me neither.” There were sparkles in his eyes.

He kissed you again, pecking you on the mouth this time, and you leaned against him with a content sigh. You could stay like this forever, wrapped in his arms with a soft warmth in your chest you’d never felt before. You played with the gold ring on his pinky finger.

“Kai?” you whispered, closing your eyes.

“Yeah?”

Your voice was soft and hopeful. “This is real, right?”

He moved his free hand to the nape of your neck, gently turning it to tilt your head towards him so he could press his lips to your temple.

“It’s real. I’m all yours,” he promised, “for as long as you’re willing to put up with me.”

You buried your face into his jacket and laughed, breathing him in. His cologne was woody and faintly sweet. “Stop saying things like that,” you mumbled. “This week without you was the longest week of my life.”

He froze, but after a second he relaxed and pulled you closer.

“I told my friends the truth, by the way. They were the ones who knocked some sense into me,” he said. “Speaking of which, we should probably go downstairs.”

Shit. You needed to tell Aeri and Yizhuo.

“They probably all think I’m an idiot now,” you groaned.

He sat up and grinned cheekily. “Is what other people think important to you?”

You rolled your eyes and nudged him, but you didn’t let go of his hand even as you stood up and led him to the door. “Hah, very funny.”

“Hey, you’ve asked me so many difficult questions. I should get to ask you some, too,” he complained, shrugging off his jacket and draping it over your shoulders.

That indescribable soft warmth grew stronger. It reminded you of how your skin felt when you stepped out of a cold room and into the sunlight. You’d missed the feeling of having Kai’s hand in yours so much that it was almost overwhelming, delivering a rush to your head that made you dizzy.

“Well, then, to answer your question: no, it’s not,” you smiled, opening the door.

The party was still thumping along downstairs; with all the chaos going on you could hardly blame anyone for missing your absence. But the second you and Kai reached the halfway point of the staircase, Taehyun spotted you from the backyard through the kitchen door like some kind of superspy, breaking into a knowing smile immediately.

“What’s that like? Must be nice,” Kai joked, although the underlying element of truth was clear in the look in his eyes as he waved to Taehyun. You squeezed his hand and smiled, trying to be comforting, not knowing if you were doing a good job or not. He led you towards the front door, clearly wanting to leave.

“Are you okay?” you asked, feeling the tension in his forearm as you held onto him so you wouldn’t get separated by the crowd. The chaotic chatter of the partygoers around you concealed your words and afforded you both a paradoxical privacy.

“Yeah. You’re here,” he replied, turning around and flashing you a sweet smile — the kind he reserved only for you. The sincerity of it knocked the air from your lungs temporarily.

Once you’d made it out of the packed house, you swiftly found Aeri to let her know you were leaving.

“Hi, uh-” Aeri started, staring at Kai’s name embroidered on the jacket around your shoulders. Her pupils were dilated from the alcohol. “What?”

“I’ll explain tomorrow, I promise,” you said, holding up your pinky finger.

She locked her own around yours with a dramatic eye roll. “God, I can’t wait to hear whatever this story is,” she ribbed, clearly joking, because she gave you a tight hug and told you to get home safe.

——————————

While you were talking to Aeri earlier, Kai had run around to the backyard to tell his own friends he was leaving to take you home. None of them had seemed even remotely surprised at this news. They saved all their questions for the group chat, not that he’d bothered to check his texts since. He’d reply to them later.

He tiptoed into your living room after you and took off his shoes, trying not to disturb your brothers.

“What are you smiling at?” Kai asked, watching you curiously as he locked the front door behind him and turned on the lights.

“Just making sure Daeseong and Daehyun did their chores,” you replied, looking around the room, clearly pleased that they had. The plates were washed, the floor was cleaned, and the curtains were drawn. As far as he could tell, the only thing left for you to do was iron.

Your wood floors were cold under his feet, even through his socks. He stood with his hands in his back pockets and waited for you to speak, but all you did was glance at the ironing and then back at him apologetically.

“I’ll help you,” he offered, never mind that ironing wasn’t exactly a two-person operation. He knew you’d forgiven him, that you were ‘back together’, but he remained on edge. You did too. Standing right beside you as you ironed and he folded clothes, he could almost taste the nervous energy radiating off of you. You two still needed to talk.

“Do you want to spend the night?” you asked. You had never invited him to stay over before.

Inquisitive, he studied your features. “Do you want me to spend the night?”

“Yeah.”

“Okay, I will.”

You fell silent. He continued folding, biting his tongue.

“I feel like I should say something, but I don’t know what to say,” you admitted, with your trademark straightforward bend, your eyes locked on Daehyun’s school uniform shirt you were pressing.

“Why did you take me back?” he blurted out, surprised by his own forwardness. He hadn’t quite realised how close to the surface in his mind that question had been bubbling for the last hour until now.

The laundry pile had depleted much faster than he expected it to (you were clearly a better ironer than he was), reduced to just two of your own school uniform shirts. You switched off the iron and set it aside, reaching for his hand. He gave it to you.

“I really like you, Kai,” you began, and as if you could sense his apprehension you immediately added, “the real you, not the one everyone else sees that you keep calling immature or cowardly or whatever you said earlier.”

Yeonjun had mentioned something ages ago: he said he spoke to you after school once and asked you what you liked about Kai. You answered, “everything.” At the time Kai figured you just didn’t know how to respond (because what kind of question was that, right?), which was what he told Yeonjun.

“No, man,” Yeonjun insisted. “I was joking around with them like, ‘Are we talking about the same person?’ And they shrugged and said, ‘He makes it easy.’ They had the corniest, dopiest smile on their face. It was revolting.”

Yeonjun was still reeling from his breakup at the time, clearly.

The way Kai felt now was exactly how he felt back then. It must’ve been more than two months ago. A flippant memory for Yeonjun, perhaps, and you probably didn’t even know Kai knew of the conversation, but Kai never stopped thinking about it.

“You’re kind, you’re caring, you’re selfless. You notice things that no one else does, and you’re always there to make sure I’m okay without ever taking credit. I wish you wouldn’t be so hard on yourself, because you’re my favourite person too,” you continued.

He shook his head, fighting off a smile, holding your hands in his. “I don’t- that’s not true.”

At that, you frowned. “But you are. And you’re wonderful.”

Your eyes were soft but insistent, pulling him in and not letting him look away. He wasn’t used to such frank words. He was used to superlatives and grand titles: the best-looking boy in school, the MVP of the soccer team, one-fifth of the fifteen day kings.

But to be called wonderful was something else. It made him giddy.

“You didn’t tell me about Stackies,” you reminded him. “Most people would have. And you didn’t tell me about Hangil.”

Kai blinked. “How do you know about that?”

“His friends were bitching about it to Aeri,” you answered. “Wasn’t it because of us?”

“Not us, you. He was being inappropriate,” Kai replied, scowling now as he remembered the encounter. “But I didn’t keep it a secret out of some noble selflessness, I just didn’t want you to find out I punched someone.”

It took you all of two seconds to see through his obvious self-deprecating lies. You didn’t dwell on it though, merely letting go of his hand and reaching for the iron to turn it back on. He could almost see you thinking, trying to figure out how best to respond without scaring him off.

Neither one of you spoke while you pressed your last two shirts and he put them neatly on hangers, or while you left to put away the laundry and he helpfully kept the iron and ironing board.

He felt exposed, mortifyingly so. Your words were too kind, the type to make him want to run away. It wasn’t like he hated attention, far from it, but it was just different when it was your attention for some reason.

But when you returned from your room empty-handed and ready to talk, he stayed and listened.

“That’s not why. You know I wouldn’t have been upset by that,” you observed with a playful smile. You never complained about people like Hangil being knocked down a few pegs.

Kai shrugged. “Well, you shouldn’t have to hear stuff like that,” he said simply. You walked right up to him and took his hand again, and it felt like his heart was going to burst. “I know you don’t need me to protect you or anything, but-”

He was almost relieved when you leant forward and kissed him to shut him up, because it was apparent he was incapable of doing so himself. You tasted like your favourite raspberry chapstick, oh so sweet and intoxicating.

“See?” you whispered when you pulled back. “You are selfless.”

——————————

After Kai stubbed his toe on the corner of your kitchen counter and only barely stopped himself from shouting in pain, you decided it’d be better to head up to the roof to talk. If either of your brothers woke up now they’d never go back to bed.

You both put on your jackets and he dragged a blanket up the stairs behind him, ready to brave the night chill until you were tired enough to sleep. Leaning back against the tall parapet, legs tangled together as you sat side-by-side on the floor, Kai rested his head on top of yours with a happy sigh.

“You knew I liked you, right?” you asked, sitting obediently still while he wrapped both of you up in the blanket and tucked you in.

“I think so. I couldn’t understand why, though,” he said, only half-joking.

“What does that mean?” you mumbled, mindlessly opening the suspiciously-old pack of gummy bears Kai had fished out of his jacket pocket earlier. He told you not to eat them, but you didn’t listen. When you offered him one, he refused.

“I remember when you first started waking up earlier to prepare your brothers’ dinner before school so you could stick around until my soccer training ended,” he started, grabbing the pack from your hands to check if the gummy bears were still edible before reluctantly returning it. You sat up, ready to dispute that, but he stopped you.

“Don’t deny it! I could tell because you started answering my messages at six in the morning instead of six-thirty,” he said, grinning smugly when you closed your mouth and relented, lying back down. “And you always brought me snacks after my practice. I knew then, I’m pretty sure, but I didn’t feel like I deserved it.”

The rooftop was small, the view was unimpressive, and the night air was cold and dry, but none of that really mattered to him. What mattered was you, your hand in his, and your head on his shoulder.

“I cannot comprehend why you think you’re so unlovable,” you mused. Your tone was light, but he could tell you were upset from the way your voice pitched up ever so slightly as it always did when you got emotional.

He watched you eat the gummy bears with a lingering mild concern, turning your words over and over in his head.

“I don’t think that exactly,” he answered after a long pause. “I just don’t really know who I am yet.”

The implied ‘how can I think I deserve love if I don’t even know myself?’ went unsaid, hanging in the air between you two like a stubborn fog unwilling to clear. Sometimes it really did feel like everyone else around him was racing ahead in front of him, leaving him in the dust, aimless and confused.

“I don’t know who I am either. Most people don’t, even if they act like they do,” you pointed out sagely. “We don’t need to have everything figured out.”

He smiled and adjusted the collar of your jacket to better shield you from the wind. “How did you get so wise?” he teased, playfully messing up your hair with his free hand. You automatically leaned into his touch when he did, like you’d never fought at all.

“If only my report cards agreed with you,” you laughed, suppressing a yawn and checking your watch. “It’s past midnight. We should go to bed,” you said quietly.

The loss of your warmth as you stood up and walked over to the rooftop door almost made him whine. He dragged himself to his feet, more tired than he would’ve liked to admit, until a realisation hit him.

“Wait,” he called, chasing after you. You turned around, looking so cute in your massive teddy jacket.

“What-”

Kai put one hand on your waist and the other on your jaw, tilting your head up so he could kiss you. He felt no surprise, no hesitation, no tension in your body as he did, even though he’d caught you off guard. Your lips were tinged with the artificial sweetness of the probably-expired gummy bears you’d been eating, soft and plush as they moved against his.

He had been craving this for so long — to feel your waist in his hands and your fingers in his hair, to be as physically close to you as the laws of nature would allow. A real, proper kiss, one where everything else in the world fell away and he could think of nothing but you.

He was forced to pull away by his pesky need for oxygen, feeling the urge to kiss you again the second he did. You looked up at him, slightly confused but mostly blissful, the sort of dazed contentment one felt after waking up and realising a loved one had covered them with a blanket while they were sleeping.

“What was that for?” you whispered, your cold fingers wrapping naturally around his forearms to hold him closer. Like it was magnetic, both of you were drawn to each other.

He beamed, pointed to your watch, and kissed your forehead one last time. “Happy 100 day anniversary.”

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thanks for reading!

-minastras <3