#can u believe two people who used to like looking at each other so much had such a tragic season of avoiding each other's gazes

[lovetei]

may u do how the om brothers would act with a bimbo mc who's like ..... scarily dumb 💀 like think Karen Smith x10 (gn mc but i don't remember the gn word for bimbo😭i think it's like thembo or something but im not sure. english isnt my first language so i might have made some mistakes😅)

I think bimbos are cute 🤭🤭

I fully believe getting treated like this by them would solve 99 percent of my problems.

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How would the brothers react to an MC who is a complete bimbo?

Warnings: Grammar errors, spelling errors, no proofreading, readers gender is not specified (even though bimbo is used to degrade a beautiful but unintelligent woman or frivolous young woman, I used "bimbo" in this scenario as someone who's attractive but unintelligent), slight dark themes, slightly deregatory

Versions: Demon brothers, Side Characters

Links: Masterlist

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LUCIFER

At first, he found you annoying

How come your only solution to problems is "Be pretty"

It's insane how stupid you were, what do you mean you don't know how to spell the orange fruit?

But soon after, he started to find you interesting

After meeting you, he believed that it's not the professionals that are dangerous, it's the newbies

It's interesting how they can never guess what's your next move

When you two got in a more romantic relationship though, he started treating you like a complete child

You would sit on his lap in a meeting while swinging your feet and you asked him, "Luci baby~ what's the investment thing you're talking about? Is that like, shopping?"

He would just chuckle and squeeze your cheek softly, "Don't think about it, little MC don't need to worry their pretty little head over something so trivial~"

MAMMON

Even though people think of him as someone who's as stupid as you

He proves them wrong when he started to act like a complete mature man around you

No funny pranks or anything, he's just taking care of you because "How can his pretty little survive in hell without him, hmm?~"

And you'll just giggle at him and continue clinging on his arm

He would walk around the academy and each time, it's either he's holding you or your stuffs

Some people would find your things on his bag and he'd just shrug it off

Though at first, he thought you as a nuisance

He started to like it how you depend on him so much

"Mams how do I use this??"

"Mams don't leave!~~"

Oh, how his heart speed up whenever you ask him for help for the smallest of things

It's alright, MC, this strong demon will protect this pretty little human.

LEVIATHAN

He hated how you used to look at him like he's some animal in a zoo

"What?? How come little Levi don't like going in parties?!"

With those pretty, glossy lips of yours and that tiny brain in your head.

He hated how you wore your uniform, can't you see how innapopriate your uniform is?!

Is the skirt supposed to be that short?!

Is that shirt supposed to have only three buttons closed?!

Why is your pants so tight?!

But once you got close to him

Oh, the contrast between the two of you made others heart flutter

Other people saw it as "Discord mod x d kitten" in the best way

But his brothers

They saw it as "the nastiest pervert x the prettiest girl"

You don't want to know why

He'll just be there sitting with his arms around your waist grumbling, "Ah, people are so noisy... Let's just stay in my room, okay?"

If that's the only thing he'll say, you might find it normal but of course, he has to say something to ruin it

"This pretty sheep won't refuse me now, will they? After all the snacks and candies I've given them, this pretty sheep will sure come with me, right?"

SATAN

As someone who values knowledge and education more than anyone among the brothers

You must've thought he'll hate you

Well, you're right

At first

Everytime your test exams will come back, he'll be the one to sigh the loudest

But after the tutoring session Lucifer planned for the two of you, to help you increase your scores

It's been different

Well, it's not like you're studying, psh, never

Satan gives you cheat sheets or tells you the answers secretly

He'll be next to you every exam and his hand will secretly on your thighs, or sometimes, even higher

Then he'll caress your skin to tell you the answer

Of course, after exams scores are released you have to give him a reward

One kiss for every correct answer, that's the reward

But since you wished for it, he'll pretend to be a good tutor and act like you really studied instead of cheating

"Ah, my baby is so smart~ look, the only thing you got wrong is the last part! Butt that's okay, it's really hard, especially for someone as innocent as my baby..."

Then he'll pepper your face with kisses

ASMODEUS

You two are a match made in heaven and hell

The moment you arrived with those leopard prints, he knew you two will have fun together

Shipping sprees and all

The internet will break everytime you two post on social media

He'll help you get in the high society of Devildom

And of course, get you a pass to the freakiest parties in hell

You two are practically beasts in parties

The most breath taking clothes and the sexiest proportions, what a combo

And the two of you will drunkly stumble inside the house, well, you will.

He's the only person who knew about you and Satan's little deal too

"Hi my prettiest baby! How's my apprentice doing?!~" He said while squeezing your cheeks

Yes, your cheeks

It doesn't matter if it's the cheeks on your face or your ass

He's squeezing them

BEELZEBUB

He wasn't annoyed or anything

In fact, he's worried for you

"It's okay, MC. I will protect you, just tell me whoever says mean things about you."

He acts like your body guard

Always beside you whenever you have to go by yourself, we'll, not by yourself anymore

Always carrying your bags

Your little make up

Holding your clothes as you shop

Paying for you

Everything, who knew who might take advantage of you if he isn't there

That's not all

He's always carrying you too

"My feet hurts so bad! Beel!"

Is how all of it started

The next day, and so on

Everytime he sees you, he's scooping you up and carrying you on his arms

BELPHEGOR

He knew you were dumb

Please, he has this sense where he can find out if someone is dumb just by hearing them form a sentence

And so far, yours is the most... You know.

He's one of the most manipulative, but also one of the most protective

He hates it when someone else use his dirty tactics on you

But that stop him from doing those dirty tactics on you again

He just loves it when you're so... Naive.

He chuckles everytime you tried to think for yourself once in a blue moon and would ruin it with a,

"Shhh... Don't think about pretty, it's better when you're dumb and dependent."

And you, who sadly didn't take that as an insult, just nodded and made him chuckle even more

Gosh, he wonders how much it will take for you to break.

[dollsome-does-tumblr]

if someone ever makes the gifset of all the times roman and gerri don't look at each other or deliberately look away from each other in season four, it's gonna be over for ol' me (in the best way possible)

[flemingsfreckles]

Newlyweds

Jessie Fleming x Reader

Preview: You and Jessie finally get married, when you get home, your original plans get derailed by your sleepy wife

Warnings: suggestive, mentions of sex (fingering), getting walked in on, no detailed smut, non sexual nudity, showering together,

WC: 1.6k

A/N: this ended up soft and fluffy, I thought about taking it the smut route but I didn’t, sorry I know yall love some smut, I also finished writing this just now and I’m just gonna post it, it’ll edit it if I find errors but it’s very possible they’re in there.

Jessie was practically cackling as she ran down the hallway of your home toward your bedroom with you cradled in her arms.

“If you fall you’re going to get us both hurt Jessie.” You tried to protest when she went to pick you up outside the front door.

“It’ll be fine! Plus it’s a tradition thing.”

“I think the tradition is the groom carries the bride through the door, last time I checked we’re both the bride.”

“Shhh just let me do it.” You had, reluctantly let her pick you up, bridal style, walking you through the door of your house. It only took 3 steps for Jessie to in fact trip over the rug that sat at the entrance.

Thankfully neither of you were hurt, she had managed to catch both herself and you before either of you hit the floor.

“Jessie!”

That’s what set her off laughing. And she couldn’t stop, she was hysterically laughing as she kept moving, using your body to push open the bedroom door. By the time she placed you on the bed you were laughing too. You couldn’t help it, your wife’s laugh was contagious.

“I cannot believe you almost fell.” You shake your head looking up at where she stood next to the bed. Going limp she flops down onto the bed next to you. She’s laying on her stomach, looking at you as you lay on your back, turned to the side to look at your wife.

“Hi wifey.” She whispers to you, the biggest toothy grin across her face.

“Hi wife.” You lean in and kiss her gently.

You both lay, just staring at each other, soaking in the fact that just a few hours ago you had officially gotten married.

The two of you had joked for so long that you practically were married, being together since you were 17 and 18, you had stayed together falling in love with each other more and more as the time went on. Now being 25 and 26 you finally had done it, in front of all your friends and family, you were married.

As you stare at her you notice her eyes starting to flutter closed, then she’d open them with a couple hard blinks, before they’d start to droop again. The sight is adorable, Jessie’s sleepy face gently placed on the bed.

“Let’s go to sleep Jess”

“No, we’re supposed to, ya know, consummate the marriage.” She cracks her eyes enough to look at you and wiggles her eyebrows.

“Babe, I think that tradition is more for people who didn’t sleep together before marriage, we’ve been having sex for like 8 years.”

“But still, we’ve never had sex as wives.”

“What do you call the fingering in the reception bathroom then?” You counter.

You weren’t too proud of it, but something about seeing Jessie in her tuxedo declaring how much she loved you in front of everyone you both cared about, turned you on. You couldn’t help yourself but to whisper some filthy words into Jessie’s ear as both of you sat having dinner. The two of you had snuck off to a bathroom during your reception to have a moment to yourselves, one thing turned into another and before you knew it Jessie had you sitting on the sink, her fingers under your dress and inside of you.

Jessie’s face turned red at the memory.

“That doesn’t count as consummation, no one finished.” She argues with you.

“That’s not my fault, you can thank your sister for that.”

Jessie’s little, but thankfully adult, sister had come looking for both of you. The photographer needed you both for photos with your brand new wedding bands. You thought you had locked the door when you walked in, turns out Jessie had already made an attempt to lock it, meaning you unlocked it. She had looked everywhere, before she opened the bathroom door, seeing her older sister between your thighs, your dress hiked up around your waist and Jessie’s hand between your legs.

“Oh, you two are disgusting.” She clasped her hand over her eyes. “Wash your hands and both of you get out here, the photographer needs you!” Jessie had been mortified, being caught by her sister of all people, she would’ve preferred a teammate. You had laughed it off and dragged your red faced wife out of the bathroom.

The party continued on for a few hours after and while you were still very turned on by your wife, the exhaustion of the day started to sink in not exactly leaving either of you in the mood for what you knew would be multiple rounds of sex.

You watched as Jessie’s eyes continued to flutter shut each time they shut they stay closed for longer and longer until you’re pretty convinced she wasn’t going to open them again.

“Hey,” you gently nudge her shoulder and her eyes crack open. “Let’s go shower and get changed.”

“But I’m so comfortable here.”

“Come on babe, we can have our first shower together as wives.” Saying the word wife and it not being a joke anymore made you smile.

“So cozy in the bed.” She mumbled as her eyes closed again.

“Alright, hang on.” You stand up, moving over to the side of the bed closest to her, you scoop your arms under her shoulders and the other under her knees. She doesn’t protest as you lift her and carry her into the bathroom.

You gently place her on the floor and give her a kiss. “Let’s get you undressed.”

“That’s what I’m talking about.” Jessie smirks at you.

“No, you were just falling asleep on the bed.”

She pouts at you, arms crossed. You gently take her wrists, undoing the cufflinks of her dress shirt and then sliding off her tuxedo coat. Your fingers move to the buttons on her vest, undoing those and helping her remove it. Lastly is her dress shirt, she works from the top down as you work to undo the bottom of her shirt. Your hands meet in the middle and she pulls the shirt off and quickly follows it with her sports bra.

“My beautiful wife.” You lean down placing kisses across her exposed skin. While your mouth stays kissing her chest, your fingers move to her belt, undoing it and sliding it out from her pants. She undoes the button on her slacks and lets them fall to the floor. You hands find the elastic of her boxers and you slowly pull them down. Moving your head from her chest you place kisses along both of her thighs as you remove her underwear.

“You’re turn.” She says, you turn away from her to allow her access to the zipper and ties on your dress.

Jessie’s hands find the top tie and begin undoing the knot. “Have I told you enough how beautiful you look?” She says as her fingers move to the next tie. “Absolutely stunning, you took my breath away.” Her hands then move to the zipper, undoing the rest of the dress. She brings her hands up to where the top of the dress sat. She begins pulling it off of your body, similarly to your actions she brings her lips, placing them on every inch of skin on your back she exposes pulling down your dress.

Jessie extends a hand to you to help you step out and over the dress. “Wow.” She takes the time to look you up and down. You had bought a new set of lingerie for the wedding. It was a lacy white set, one you knew would make your wife crazy. “Where did you get this?” Her fingers work into the straps of the bra.

“Oh you know, just something I had lying around.” You joke with her. Her eyes are locked on your chest. “Quit staring, I’ll put it on again tomorrow for you to fully enjoy.” The comment had Jessie biting her lip, likely thinking of what she’d get to do to you after a good night's sleep.

You move your own hands to your bra, unclasping the back while Jessie’s thumbs hook into your matching panties and pull them down your legs. She comes back up to meet your lips with hers.

You both stay for a second, grinning at each other, both overwhelmed with happiness. You pull away to start the shower, while you wait for it to run warm you pull Jessie into your arms, hugging from behind. You turn the two of you toward the mirror above the vanity.

“Look at my wife.” You point in the mirror at Jessie’s figure in front of you.

“Ehh she’s alright but look at my wife!” She teases you back, pointing at you in the mirror.

“I love you, wife.”

“I love you, wife”

Your arms release her, giving her a quick squeeze with your hand on her shoulders. “Let’s hurry up and shower so we can sleep and then tomorrow we can do all the consummating you want.” You give her a wink and she quickly follows you into the shower, the two of you having a moment of peace and relaxation after the day’s festivities. As you looked at her in the shower, you couldn’t help but think how it was just the two of you, and that was all you would ever need. You and her.

[arminsumi]

HELLOOO THERE!! Can I request gojo dating reader because of a bet with suguru and falling for reader, reader doesn’t know and was hurt when they overheard they’re just a bet, angst to fluff pls 🫶🫶🫶

thank youuuu, hope your having a good day!!

˗ˏˋ꒰ 🍒 ꒱

𝐈𝐭 𝐦𝐞𝐚𝐧𝐭 𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐲𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠

A/N: u have no idea how much i LOVE this idea anon!!! 💗💗💗 i really hope i did it justice 😩

Wc ≈ 1.4k

Pairing: GOJO Satoru x f.reader

Summary: Suguru betted that Gojo could make anyone fall in love with him, even someone who was his complete opposite — like you.

Warnings; angst-to-fluff, angst contents — {self-loathing (Gojo), crying, heartbreak}, a little bit suggestive at the end, kissing/making out

♪ michelle

It was nice while it lasted.

The handholding in public, the stolen cheek kisses, the pampering and spoiling, relishing in the jealous looks thrown your way when he fed you bites of his food in the cafeteria, bathing in Gojo Satoru's affection. A lot of people would have killed for your position, or even a glimpse into what it's like to date your college's biggest heart throb.

You two seemed to really like each other. It was like two mismatched puzzle pieces somehow fitting together — a fascinating connection was shared. No one would have put you and him together, not even Gojo.

The only reason he asked you out in the first place was...

"Suguru, that's such a nasty idea... I love your mind."

"Just don't actually fall in love with her. The whole idea of this bet is that you can prove any girl can fall in love with you, don't forget that."

Gojo had chuckled at this, it seemed so ridiculous.

Why would he actually fall in love with you? You weren't even his type. He never paid you a sparing glance, not at school, not at parties, not around town.

You weren't his type...

So why did his heart start panging excitedly a few months into your 'fake' relationship? Why did he swoon when you fell asleep laid on his chest in his dorm room? Why did he want to kiss you so badly every time he saw your face? Why did he jump like a cat whenever he got a text from you? Why did he kiss you like the world was ending?

And why did he cry when you found out the truth? He looked distraught when Suguru let the secret slip.

Why did Gojo Satoru, the strongest, beg on his knees for you to stay when you were about to walk away?

"Please! I'm so sorry! I know it was so wrong and fucked up — shit I regret it so much — I really like you! I swear to god, I swear on my life!"

You choked on your tears so badly that you could barely talk. "I can't believe you. This is such a fucking horrible th - thing to do to s - someone, Gojo."

He felt so hurt that you went back to calling him Gojo and not Satoru, like you used to when the two of you were just mild acquaintances.

"Don't go!" He almost yelled.

His arms wrapped around your midriff, he slid down like he was too weak to support himself — like his legs went limp. He slid down until he was clinging to your legs. He sobbed with such a genuine-looking crying face that you almost believed it. He wasn't play-crying like he does to get attention or persuade people, he was ugly-crying.

Gojo Satoru, the prettiest boy you ever knew, was an ugly-crier. A string of saliva glistened between his canines, his mouth hung open like a dramatic renaissance portrait of a distraught man. His eyes were pinched so tight that fat tears cascaded out the corners.

"Please don't go!"

⁕⁕⁕

Suguru found his best friend sat in the middle of the campus' main stairs. Desolate. One hand holding up his heavy head. Regretful. eyes closed.

"So it didn't go well?"

Satoru didn't raise his head, but he slowly opened his eyes and looked miserably at the floor. He watched a line of ants.

"It went as horribly wrong as you could imagine." he responded eventually.

Suguru came to sit next to him. "Are you really in love?" he asked him seriously.

"Of course I fucking am! — sorry..." Satoru snapped, then immediately mumbled an apology.

A long summer breeze went by.

"Try again." he suggested, "I'm sure she'll - "

"She fucking hates me."

There was a heavy silence after Satoru said that.

"If I were her, I'd hate me too." Satoru muttered.

Suguru went silent. He felt guilty, after all, he was the one that dared his best friend to do something as stupid as play with your heart.

Satoru watched the ants scurrying along. He felt as puny and weak as one right then. The realization of these feelings themselves are what urged him to abruptly stand up.

"I'm not giving up. I'm gonna explain to her that I really did fall in love — that I really do fucking like her so god damn much it's insane and stupid."

"That's the spirit — where are you going?" Suguru asked curiously as Satoru began heading over to the parking lot.

"I'm gonna go bring her flowers and... stuff..." he replied unsurely.

Will that really work? He wondered to himself.

"But it's gonna rain." Suguru said, "Heyyy, Satoru, listen don't just — ah, there he goes... idiot really fell in love when I warned him not to..." he muttered pitifully.

⁕⁕⁕

There was a knock at your apartment door.

You wrung it open to reveal a heartbroken Gojo Satoru, soaked-through with rain, standing in the downpour, panting while holding onto a bouquet of vividly red roses. You couldn't have witnessed a more dramatic scene in a movie.

His hair was completely flat with wetness. There were raindrops running down his cheeks and dripping off his chin.

On the walk to your apartment, Satoru had mentally written a speech for you.

It was definitely a well-rehearsed heartbroken boy's 'take me back' speech. Flawless and direct. Surely it would have sufficed.

But he didn't say even the first few words of his practiced speech when your door flew open.

All he did was break down crying and fall to his knees right in front of you, like some dramatic actor — except he wasn't acting, you could feel the realness of his regrets and miseries through each sob.

"Satoru..." you looked down at him pitifully. "Come inside, you're gonna get sick." you said tenderly.

For some reason, those very small words communicated more emotions than any form of 'I love you' ever could.

⁕⁕⁕

His pretty nose was slightly upturned. You noticed that when he first kissed you after your third date.

You noticed it again when you observed how red it had become from crying and sneezing.

Wrapping a blanket around him. Drying his hair. Fluffing it with your fingers. Making him some tea. Sitting him down on your bed. Putting on a movie. Letting him curl up into your arms — something he never did when you two were 'dating' because he was convinced he had to show off his dominance to win you over.

All of this together settled the air between you two. But it still didn't explain everything.

"Why'd you do something so dumb?" you asked him half-humorously.

He nibbled and chewed on his lip, eyes on the TV — not really, actually they were looking at your subtle reflection within it.

"I'm an asshole." he admitted.

"You don't say." you chuckled.

He felt bad, and uncurled his body and raised his face to look at you. Satoru never wore a serious expression in all the time you've known him, both as acquaintances and 'lovers' — except for now, which is how you know it's true.

"I wasn't supposed to fall in love with you. Suguru dared me because... well, because it seemed comical. We're opposites, no one would ever put us together right? But he and I thought that was a hilarious challenge. We wanted to see if I could catch you and make you fall in love with me, or something like that..."

He started mumbling his words and refused to look at you.

"Satoru."

"Yeah?"

He reared his head up at you.

"Did it mean something to you, the time we spent this summer?"

He didn't hesitate to respond, "It meant everything." he said.

"Well, then there we go." you said with a little smile.

"Am I being forgiven...?"

"Mhm."

He seemed taken aback and unsure. Was he really being forgiven? Were you reversing the script on him and pulling a trick on him now?

"Does this mean..." he mumbled quietly, "... that I'm allowed to kiss you right now?" he asked nervously, heart panging, eyes giving your lips a longing glance.

"You're such an idiot." you sighed, "Yeah of course it means you can kiss m — mmmf!"

You never managed the rest of your words out, they all got muffled on Satoru's lips. His hand came to cup your right cheek, fingers caressing your skin like you meant everything to him. He tilted his head into the kiss, broke apart for air, dove back in, kissed you feverishly fervently violently eagerly — with so much affection and thankfulness that you almost couldn't breathe due to being smothered.

"Sorry..." he panted after breaking the kiss, bottom lip glistening with saliva. "I'm sorry for breaking a heart as good as yours."

"Just don't do it again." you told him in a whisper.

The poor boy, two days without kissing was really too much for him. He went right back in and kissed you blue, until you gasped and subconsciously wrapped your legs around his slim waist and pulled him closer. His whole body felt hot and eager. You tasted so good, you looked so good, you loved him so good — he decided right there in the back of his mind that he'd marry you after graduation.

[folkloresthings]

hello hello hello !!! i just want to say i love love LOVE your fics, esp the oscar ones… the one you posted a few hours ago 🥺 my heart 🥺

i saw your post about oscar requests and i thought it’s meant to be because i’ve been listening a lot to taylor these last few days! could i maybe request osc and “all of the girls you loved before”? 🤭 hope you’re having wonderful day sweetheart!! 💓

-@httpiastri

this song. this man. thank u @httpiastri

ALL OF THE GIRLS YOU LOVED BEFORE. ❨ oscar piastri x reader ❩

despite being young, you weren’t stupid. you knew millions of women would kill to be with your boyfriend. you knew that, before you’d met, he had girls hanging off of his arm every weekend. you knew he’d had girlfriends before, flings and flirtations. but for six whole months, he’d been yours and yours only.

he never spoke about his ex’s, just as you never spoke about yours. you didn’t need to — you were too wrapped up in your love for each other to care about anyone else. that was, of course, until you went home with him.

the australian grand prix meant meeting oscar’s family for the first time. it went perfectly, an absolute dream. his mother adored you, fawning over you every second you stayed in her home. you, too, were her biggest fan. she’d raised the man you loved, bringing him up loyal and kind and everything you had fallen for.

being in his hometown meant bumping into other people from his life, or his past. even the ones you didn’t want to.

“oh, hey! y/n, right?” the bar was loud so you could barely hear the girl over the music. you nodded, smiling, and took a sip of your drink.

“yeah, that’s me! hi!”

the girl smiles back at you, but its one that makes you uneasy. a judging sort of smile, one that takes all over your features. all of a sudden, you hate the dress you chose and the way you’ve done your hair. this girl is stunning, all tanned and beach waves.

“i’m jessica,” she tells you, assured. “i used to go to school with oscar.”

your eyes light up, loving to hear from people who knew oscar long before you did. you look around for your boyfriend, but he’s off somewhere with lando.

“he’s around here somewhere — have you bumped into him yet?” you ask, innocent and sincere.

“no, not yet. i’m dying to see him though.”

you engage in as much painful small talk as you can, your gut twisting uncomfortably as you concur that this girl knows something you don’t. you only relax when you feel a familiar hand on your waist, oscar’s lips pressing in greeting to your head.

“hi, baby,” he murmurs, eyes going a little wide when they find the other girl’s. “jessica?”

“hey, os!” she greets brightly, reaching across to hug him, awkward from where his hand never leaves your waist. “i was just talking to your new little girlfriend here. have you taken her to all of your spots yet?”

your brows furrow towards the girl and she smirks.

“oscar used to take me to all these special places around here when we were going out. i’m sure he’ll show you them, won’t you?”

“oh, you two dated?” you question, glancing between jessica and your boyfriend.

“yeah, for ages.”

“barely.”

the two speak at the same time, jessica’s cheeks going red from oscar’s answer. she was fighting a losing battle, and his grip on you was only getting tighter.

“me and y/n have our own places,” oscar states, gaze cold. “see you, jessica.”

he’s pulling you away from the scowling woman before you know it, out to the empty smoking garden and fresh air. his eyes screw shut, frustration pulling a low groan from him.

“shit, i’m so sorry. we dated for, like, a month when we were sixteen. she cheated a few times and only took interest when i started driving for F1,” he explains, breathless and panicked. “i swear, she means nothing. i can’t believe she tried to talk to you like that.”

“oscar, calm down,” you laugh fondly, taking his soft cheeks in your hands. he returns a pout, eyes all puppy dog like to make you melt. “it’s fine. i’m not bothered about her.”

“you’re not?” oscar sighs, relief shedding from him. “i thought you’d be… i don’t know, annoyed.”

“that you have a few ex—girlfriends?” if you couldn’t already be impossibly in love with him already, he was giving you a million reasons to be. “babe, all of those girls — all of the ones you loved before, they’ve made you the one i’ve fallen for.”

oscar visibly softens, and it fills you with so much emotion that you feel your chest seize. he squeezes at your waist, pulling you into a tooth—rotting kiss. you press against his soft, wine stained lips but he’s smiling too much into it that the kiss is lost in a sea of loving giggles.

“i never loved any girl the way i love you, you know,” oscar whispers, eyes raking over your love stricken face.

“not even your mum?” you smirk, poking his side.

“shut up,” oscar grins, kissing you again. “yeah, but don’t tell her that.”

[dxrksong]

Jason 13 au memes part two

Bruce: *slams a door on accident*

Batfam: you slam door on Brood? YOU SLAM DOOR ON BROOD LIKE GROUNDINGS???! OH!! OH JAIL FOR FATHER!!! JAIL FOR FATHER FOR 1000 YEARS!!!!

Jason 13, calling Danny on speed dial: JAIL FOR FATHER!!!!

-----------

Kitty:

Jason:

Kitty: YOU DIDN'T TELL ME YOU WERE BUILT LIKE A BRICK HOUSE!!!!!

Jason: to be fair, I forgot???

Kitty: speaking of which, hows that going out for you?

Jason: it's been....emotional.....not to mention the whord of shades trying to mother hen me 24/7

Kitty: I've been meaning to ask you about those.

Jason: I thought you wanted to talk about our relationship?

Kitty: we have communication rings, we can do that later. I'm more worried about the tall intimidating city spirit behind you.

Jason: oh that's just Gotham

Kitty:

Gotham: *tall black lady that can kick your ass* ;)

Kitty, sweating:

Jason: don't worry, she's nice. She's just a litte over protective of her kids.

Kitty: there's MORE of you????

----------

Kitty:

The batfam:

Kitty, surrounded by baby ghost cores like stray kittens: I don't know what's worse. How much they look like you or the inane urge to just adopt them all, oh nooooooooooo!!

Jason: now you know how it feels old man.

Bruce: *confused in bat*

--------------

Kitty:

Catwoman:

Kitty: crimes?

CatWoman: hell yes, kitten!

[LATER]

Jason: WHO THE FUCK DYED MY SUIT PINK?!?!?!

--------------

Kitty: you know considering my name it's a little odd that you're the one being all cat like.

Jason, laying his head on her lap while she cards through his hair: shut uuup, it's not like I can ask anyone else for attention like this. It'd be weeeeiiiird.

Kitty: *sighs* better hope you didn't leave your comm on.

Jason:

Kitty: Johnny.

Jason: I can't remember if I turned it off or not

Dick: you know little wing, if you wanted attention you could've just asked-

Jason: SHIT!!!!!!

---------------

Spectra: so are you still dating him or..?

Kitty: you know? We died basically around the same time and we were introduced to each other first before anyone else, so we kinda just stuck together. And really everyone had kinda just started calling us boyfriend and girlfriend, and we just didn't think otherwise to correct them.

Ember: wait, so you two HAVEN'T been dating??

Kitty: it was never official, if anything it was an ongoing bet to see how long it would last before people started to notice. We're more like.....siblings but not quite. Or emotional support ghosts for each other.

Spectra: that....actually makes a lot of sense. You two are hardly seen without the other and you haven't exactly been dead for long, so it would make sense you're still settling down from the trauma of dying.

Kitty: did you just psychoanalise me?!

Spectra: You basically gave it to me on a silver platter!! It's a force of habit!!!

--------------

Jason: hey squishy

Blob ghost in Johnny 13's bike: ?

Jason: think you can get this blob ghost out of my corpse-

Squishy: *Rev's backwards out of the bat cave*

Jason: ouch! Not even my own pet will help a zombie out.

------------

Danny: so how you feelin Jason?

Jason, sarcastically: oh just great, I've only had ONE murderous breakdown this week due to Zom!

Danny: Zom????

Jason: the blob ghost possessing me.

Danny: You named it????!

Jason: WHAT WAS I SUPPOSED TO DO?!?! IT'S A FREAKING BLOB GHOST, IT'S NOT LIKE IT HAD A NAME BEFORE!!!!!

Danny:

Jason:

Danny: I'm telling frostbite-

Jason: Don't you DARE!

--------------

Dick: Hey, Jason? Can you come over? I need your help.

Jason, muffled by a humming noise: sorry, I don't think that'll be possible at the moment?

Dick: what do you mean by that Jay, and what is that sound?

Jason, swallowed into the shadows and getting fussed over by the shades: would you believe me if I said I got readopted by shades?

Dick: U Wot?

---------------

Batman: Jason, what's this about shades adopting you??

Jason: look I didn't ask for it, it just happened.

Bruce: and are they....good? Parents?

Jason: well they like putting me in shadow jail alot.

Batman: Shadow jail?????

Jason: not to mention the constant babying-

Bruce: WHAT?!?!

Jason: ?! Jeez Bruce!! Wha-

Bruce: YOU LET THEM BABY YOU?!?!?!

Jason:

Bruce: I HAVENT BEEN ABLE TO DO THAT SINCE THE FIGHTING STARTED!!!!

Jason: .....are-are you JEALOUS?!

Bruce:

Bruce >:'(

--------------

Dick: ok, so to recap! *pulls out a projector and a Google slide document*

Dick: Jason got reanimated by something going awry and messing with reality, accidentally reviving Jason. *click* He gets scooped up by Talia and revives him fully. *click* this leaves him with powers and uncontrollable emotional problems *click* apparently he can talk to ghosts and they are often friendly to him back. *click* so much so, according to Jason himself, he has been adopted by the entirety of the ghost population in Gotham *click* including the SPIRIT of Gotham herself.

*it's a vague drawing of what Gotham looks like*

Dick: any questions?

Tim: yeah, uh. Who's that?

Danny: hi! :D

Dick: no clue, next question!

Danny: I'm phantom! I used to beat Jason up when he used to go by Johnny 13!

Batfam:

Cass: does the Lazarus pit taste like lemonade?

Dick: no, it tastes more like sprite.

Duke: wait-how do you-

Dick: NEXT QUESTION!

--------------

Jason, 'living on his own':

The Shades: :)

Squishy: :)

Gotham sometimes: :)

Kitty: :P

Danny: >:)

The various bird and/or bat: :)

Damien: :

Ember: lmao I'm the older one now! >:D

Spectra: (usually only when Kitty shows up)

Skulker: (target practice training) >:)

Technus: (built Johnny's bike believe it or not) >:)

The box ghost: (this man has dad energy, change my mind) >:)c

The lunch lady: (every growing ghost needs proper calories!) :)

Jason: ...............I need a bigger house....

-----------------

Batman steps into the batcave to see green fire everywhere, Jason in his ghost form, and Damien trying to stab him with a sword.

Damien: it was Todd's idea!

Jason: Damien, you fucking snitch!

Batman: language!

Damien: yeah Hood, watch your fucking language!

Batman: DAMIEN!

(Reference to this)

--------------

Jason: remind me why you're here again?

Danny: what? Like I can't visit my favorite Rouge?

Jason: I thought that was plasmius?

Danny: he's my arch nemesis, not a rouge! He doesn't count!

Jason: if you say so. But why am I your favorite, and I'm pretty sure I no longer qualify to be one of your rouges?

Danny: dude you're the only one I can have a serious conversation about! Vlad's a fruitloop!!

Jason: yeah but at least he knows what he's taking about half the time.

Danny: psh. 'Half the time'

Danny:

Danny: you can still turn into Johnny, right?

Jason: I mean if I concentrate real hard I guess? But it'll take a lot of energy.

Danny: wanna convince Vlad he's going insane?

Jason: only if I can record it.

Danny: DEAL!

[secondcupforyou]

seventeen as horrible pick-up lines, a carat/valentine’s day special 🩷🩵

disclaimer, this is purely for entertainment purposes and does not reflect who seventeen are as people.

pairing! ot13 (separate) x gender neutral! reader

warnings! light swearing

word count! ~1k words total

author’s note! i found a list of horrible pick-up lines and couldn’t stop myself…

Seungcheol

“I can't taste my cherry lip gloss! Can you give it a try?”

“Huh? Like you want me to try it out?” you asked as you rummaged around your bag. You had been trying to find your phone to get directions for the restaurant you got reservations for. After you found it, you looked up to see Seungcheol’s pouty face. At that, you realised he was probably asking for something less explicit. “Oh, was that you asking to kiss me? You should have been more clear.”

Jeonghan

“Are you iron? Cause I don’t get enough of you.”

”Last time I checked, I wasn’t Iron Man, so I would check somewhere else.” you joked. However, you weren’t fully expecting the whining that would come after it. As you began to laugh at his reaction, Jeonghan’s complaining got louder. Through broken laughs, you tried to speak, “C’mon, I know you could do better than that.”

Joshua

“On a scale of 1 to America, how free are you this weekend?”

You looked up from your textbook as you heard Joshua’s voice. The two of you were supposed to be working on a project your professor had assigned you for the week. As you looked into his eyes, his small smile irked you just enough to complain: “Can’t you ask like a normal person? If you did, then maybe I would be free.”

Before he could respond, you began to work on the assignment once again.

Jun

“Do you believe in love at first sight, or should I walk by again?”

You had lost track of the amount of times Jun had used different pick-up lines throughout the day. It started when you first saw each other today, and it hasn’t stopped since. While it was endearing for you, you could also see the annoyance building up from your friends. With a quick laugh, you leaned into his ear to whisper, “I would stop before one of them ends up punching you.”

Soonyoung

“This date is like a big bowl of Frosted Flakes. It’s grrrrrrrrreat!”

When Soonyoung said this to you, you couldn’t help but laugh. Maybe it was because of his complete seriousness as he looked you straight in the eyes, or maybe it was because of the silence that filled the room before. Either way, you weren’t expecting him to tell you a stupid pick-up line.

“What the hell is wrong with you?” you were finally able to ask as your laughs began to calm down.

Wonwoo

“Good thing I have a library card, because I'm checking you out.”

Maybe it was because you were at the library that this was so cheesy, but you don’t think it would change much. He quickly moved to continue browsing through the books on the shelves; however, you could see a hint of blush lie across his cheeks. It made you smile.

“Ya’ know,” you began, “if you didn’t read books, then this would have been more awkward.”

Jihoon

“To quote the poet Lee Woozi, ‘Even if my lips are dry, I need to say this, baby: I adore you.’”

“Did you just use your own song to try to pick me up?” you said as you attempted to close the door to his studio. You had just ran to get some snacks from the convenience store before the two of you worked on music for the night, so your hands were filled with snacks. After watching you struggle a bit with the door, Jihoon got out of his chair to close the door for you. You whispered a small ‘thanks’ before setting them down on the table.

Seokmin

“I thought happiness started with ‘h,’ but turns out it begins with ‘u.’”

“And my happiness begins with ‘seok’ and ends with ‘min,’” you laughed as you brought the cup of coffee to your lips. Looking up from your cup, you saw Seokmin’s bright smile at your joke; however, you couldn’t help but feel embarrassed by it. “That joke was so awkward. I’m sorry.”

Mingyu

“Can I get your soccer jersey? I really want your name and number.”

At first, the line went over your head. One, you don’t play soccer. Two, Mingyu already had both your name and number. Three, why would Mingyu even use a pick-up line while talking to you? Though, the longer you took to respond, the more he began to pout.

As you watched him sulk, you came to the realisation quickly, “Oh, wait, that pick-up line was directed at me?”

Minghao

“Are you a parking ticket? Cause you've got fine written all over you.”

Minghao’s face was distraught, almost as if he was currently questioning his sanity. The sight of it was comedic. You slowly began to laugh at the situation, asking the question, “Who dared you to say that?”

Once you asked that, you could see the relief on his face.

Seungkwan

“If you're a fruit, you'd be a fine-apple.”

“Damn, does that mean it’s cannibalism for me to eat pineapples,” you said as you picked a bunch of bananas. You and Seungkwan had been shopping for your groceries for the week as you had just run out of cooking ingredients. After checking the quality of the bananas, you put them in the cart you were pushing around. “Good thing I like tangerines then.”

Vernon

“Did I tell you I'm filthy rich and my mother's dead?”

“Okay, yeah, that is pretty bad,” you admitted as you picked up a piece of chocolate. The two of you had been reading through lists of pick-up lines to try to find the worst one. At first, it started as a bit of a competition, but you had slowly lost the competitiveness of it. Scrolling through your phone, you tried to find one that was just as bad to beat Vernon’s. “What about this one…”

Chan

“Math is so confusing. It's always talking about x and y and never you and I.”

“I know that was a pick-up line, but I feel like using the variables ‘u’ and ‘i’ would make it worse, “ you said as you finished up the math problem in your textbook. Chan laughed as he grabbed a pencil sharpener from your pencil case. “No, like, seriously. Imagine writing them even just a little bit differently then, all of sudden, it is a 0 or a 1.”

mirajane’s rambles! i actually have no idea how i did this in a couple hours. my found this website where they were referring to pick-up lines as “rizz” lines, and i spiralled lmao. i had fun tho

happy valentine’s and carat day, everyone! <33

all likes/reblogs/comments are appreciated!

[all4seth]

can u write something with seth being more touchy than usual nd ppl noticing nd teasing him about it, nd like u can write the rest😔❤️IDK IF U TAKE REQUESTS ND ITS FINE IF U DON'T DO U, LOVE UR WRITING💞

seth clearwater x reader

summary: you and seth attend edward and bella’s wedding that takes place in the evening (unlike in the movies where it's noon or something)

i barely ever write anymore, i’m so sorry you had to wait this long for this 😔

i clumsily entered the living room and as i did, two pairs of eyes measured me up and down before my parents jumped up and hugged me.

“you look stunning sweetheart” my mom said, tucking strands of my hair behind my ear. “i knew this shade of purple would look incredible on you”

“thanks, mom”

“i thought you weren’t supposed to show up looking prettier than the bride” my dad joked.

i rolled my eyes and hugged him, just as the doorbell rang. i followed behind my parents, nervously fidgeting with my dress. as soon as they opened the door, they stepped aside, revealing my boyfriend.

my handsome boy.

he was holding two bouqutes of flowers, one of which he handed to my mom, who accepted it happily.

as his gaze met mine, his eyes widened and the world stood still, like it did the first time we ever saw each other.

“you are so beautiful”

my parents made us pose for a picture and they watched us in awe as we headed towards the car.

seth wrapped his arm around my waist and i gently let my head fall onto his shoulder.

“whose car is this?”

“billy lend me jacob’s since he’s… you know”

he started the engine and drove slowly, since it was still quite early.

“i still can’t believe edward and bella are getting married! i mean, everyone knows how in love they are, but still, this is huge! and they’re both just 18” i blurted out.

“it is kind of mind blowing"

seth placed his right hand on my thigh and my heart skipped a beat.

“is this alright?”

“yes” i answered and gave him a huge smile, which he must’ve seen, even though his eyes were glued to the road, because a shy smile quickly grew on his face.

"do you think they’re too young though?" seth asked, after taking a few moments to compose himself. "bella and edward, i mean”

“they are, they’re just about to graduate. on the other hand, they love each other and love drives us all crazy” i giggled.

“do i make you crazy?” seth asked jokingly.

“soo insane, but i bet it’s nothing compared to the other way around”

“i’m crazy about you” seth looked at me for a slight moment and my heart jumped again.

“i’m crazy about you too, seth, you have no idea”

after a little while, he pulled into the cullens’ driveway and reached for my hand as he opened the door for me.

i placed my palm in his and kissed him briefly. his face lit up and he kept me close, his arm around my waist.

we were warmly welcomed by esme, who led us to the garden.

fairy lights hung from the trees, resembling fireflies. a few rows of wooden seats were placed before the altar that stood covered in white, dainty flowers, much like the rest of the place. some of their petals had fallen on the ground, giving the scene a fairytale-like air.

seth placed his warm hand on my lower back and kissed my cheek.

“are you alright, sweetheart?”

“it’s beautiful” i stated, still in awe of the remarcable scenery.

“so beautiful” he whispered.

i turned to him, but he was already looking at me.

we sat down and people started showing up.

finally, bella walked down the aisle, holding tightly onto her father’s arm. edward stood patiently, looking at her as if it was only the two of them, nothing else mattered. tears streamed down my face, overwhelmed by the beauty of it all.

they vowed and kissed and it hit me - there’s no such thing as ‘too early’ when it comes to love. it’s all about taking risks and putting your pride aside, because once you find the one person you know was made for you, you must hold tightly onto them.

“i love you so much” i whispered to seth.

“i love you too, beautiful” he gently placed his right hand on my hair and kissed my forehead.

his left hand stayed on my thigh, while the other fell onto my shoulder.

once the party started, seth and i were separted by the crowd, when bella pulled me aside.

“congratulations, sweet girl, you did it!”

i embraced her into a hug, and when i tried pulling away, she held me a bit tighter and whispered "not yet, i just need a moment"

"wow, you're a mess!" i laughed, referring to her makeup, which was mostly gone, due to her crying multiple times. "but you're a pretty mess and i don't blame you; God knows how many times i cried during the ceremony and it's not even my wedding!"

"it's so not safe for me to cry here, alice yells at me and emmett makes fun of me"

“where’s he taking you for the honeymoon?” i asked, excitedly.

“i really don’t know, he won’t tell me” bella laughed.

suddenly, i felt a hand on my waist and felt seth’s lips on my shoulder.

“well, hello to you too” i laughed and pecked his lips.

bella giggled awkwardly and looked around for her groom, who was at her side in an instant.

“you better slow it down, seth, these people seem too tired to handle another wedding tonight” edward joked and we all burst out laughing, but seth’s hands remained glued to my hips.

after a few moments, they both laughed as if one of them had cracked some joke bella and i couldn't hear, so she and i simply exchanged a suspicious look.

the newly wed couple was quickly stolen away from us by the other guests, and seth and i found ourselves wandering towards the quiet forest.

we got to a dimly lit opening; “a thousand years” could still be heard from the speakers.

“how can i love when i’m afraid to fall?”

seth tenderly let his hands fall onto my hips and looked me in my eyes and the same feeling came right back into my chest.

“all of my doubt suddenly goes away somehow”

i let my head rest somewhere between his chest and his shoulder, while we slow danced.

"i have died everyday waiting for you/ darling don't be afraid, i have loved you for a thousand years"

seth and i hummed along and mumbled the lyric "i'll love you for a thousand more"

[cocogum]

The unconventional marriage between Yugo and Amalia. (an analysis)

Before I jump into it, I’m going to first talk about my personal thoughts on this moment:

💖💖💖❤️‍🔥❤️❤️‍🔥💕💕❤️💖💖❤️❤️❤️WE WON, WE GOT FED OMG THEY’RE SO CUTE TOGETHER, KISS MORE‼️‼️‼️‼️I’VE BEEN WAITING FOR THIS MOMENT MY WHOLE LIFE I’VE WATCHED YOU GUYS GROW UP FUCK‼️‼️‼️❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥✨✨❤️‍🔥💖💖❤️‍🔥😭❤️❤️💕😭😭😭😭😭✨💖✨🥰🥰✨💖✨❤️‍🔥

Now that we got that out of my system, let’s begin explaining what happened.

The scene starts with Yugo and Amalia, holding a bouquet of flowers, walking side by side together.

At first, I thought she was carrying the flowers for Armand’s grave but it turns out that they were both walking together TO THEIR WEDDING.

(now that I think about it, it actually makes sense that Amalia won’t be carrying flowers for Armand’s tree grave cuz like…she’s a sadida. Giving flowers to another sadida, especially a DEAD ONE sounds very disrespectful lol)

I’m guessing there was a slight time skip between the necrome war and the wedding because we can see Armand’s tree, which had been just a bud in Amalia’s hands during the fight, look like it grew up a bit underneath his parents’ tree shades.

Once the two walk up to the altar, they stand side by side and hold hands while facing the others who have come for them. We can see the Percedal family with Poo, Cleophee with Black Ink and Elaine, Dathura, Renate and Canar (Amalia’s two closest servants), Alibert with Grougal, Chibi, Adamaï, and Ruel. As well as Kerubim and Atcham (Joris doesn’t seem to be there though or maybe he’s just too short that we can’t see him 😭😭).

Not to mention that we can also see the elite eliatropes standing in the back and the sadidas too!

However, as soon as the two face the crowd together, Yugo decides to teleport him and Amalia away from the ceremony, causing the people to gasp at that sudden choice.

This was obviously not a planned decision that had been added to the occasion which is why even Amalia had been caught off guard by the act.

But once she takes a second to realize her surroundings, she knows she shouldn’t be afraid and so, she simply smiles back at Yugo knowing it’s just the two of them now, way up high in the skies.

They hold onto each other without the need to say anything, knowing full well that the other is just as happy to be together like this. To feel like for once, in a speck of a minute, there’s no danger to fight. There’s no big evil they need to defeat, no psychopath trying to eradicate the gods for vengeance, no big demon coming to have some fun, and no lost soul trying to live like in the old days.

They can finally enjoy the moment they’ve been waiting for so long, after so many challenges, unspoken words that needed to be said but couldn’t be told, and the many foes they faced.

For once, it’s just them up in the skies.

And that’s when they truly kiss without any regrets or doubts. They’re not thinking about anything else.

They can just think about themselves for now.

Here they are omg!! My babies are finally together!! 😩❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥❤️❤️❤️❤️💖💖💖

Can you believe that? It’s been a lot more than six years that we’ve been waiting for this very moment and here they are finally married and happy to be with each other like this!! 😭😭

I actually DID NOT expect to see these two getting married in the last episode but I’m so glad I did cuz my heart literally jumped out of its place and made me choke on my soda (i chose pineapple flavor for some reason).

Now that we’ve got our feelings out of the way, it’s time we analyze this wedding scene much more closely.

At first glance, Yugo and Amalia’s wedding was very sweet and beautiful, something that was deserved for the two after being apart and filled with problems on their respective sides.

It’s so sweet in fact that it stands out from any other weddings we’ve seen in Wakfu (yes, even the attempted one with Count Harebourg and Amalia) but I’ll use Dally and Eva’s wedding as the main example.

Usually, when there’s a marriage in the World of Twelve, we’ve seen the white dresses and suits, and especially the glowing happy vibes that the wedding is giving. We’ve seen it with Dally and Eva’s wedding back in the OVAs.

Evangelyne was wearing a white dress while Dally was wearing a good suit that properly dressed him up completely. They had the Sadida ruler, King Oakheart, acting as the priest in charge of the wedding. They then exchanged their wedding rings and waited for the king to end the ceremony so they could seal it with a kiss.

That is what you call a proper wedding, a classic one to be more specific.

So when we compare their marriage with Yugo and Amalia’s, one can’t help but distinguish the differences in what happened during their ceremony.

And boy is it different.

First detail we can notice is the clothing. Amalia may be wearing the royal white cape but that is just what Armand wore. So the cape cannot count as classic clothing for the wedding because it is a common piece of clothing that the Sadida ruler(s) wear while on the job. It may not look very clear at first but if you zoom in on what Amalia is wearing, she seems to have put on the same usual clothing we see her wear at all times except that it now has the white color and the leaf is green, the color symbolizing how a new age came and the kingdom now has proper rulers.

We can technically say that Amalia’s choice of clothing for the wedding would be somewhat acceptable but since she has only changed the color of the same clothes she wears every day, we cannot count this as classic wedding attire.

As for Yugo, his clothes are much easier to declare that they are not fit to be worn for a proper wedding. He’s been wearing his hood and combat suit this whole time and even on this special day, he hasn’t taken them off.

It’s clear to say that these two did not respect the clothing rule for their own wedding.

Second detail we can notice are the rings. Usually, lovers often use wedding rings to symbolize their union as well as their commitment to one another. Dally and Eva perfectly demonstrated that rule by exchanging their rings with each other (despite how they’re actually brass knuckle rings but that still counts since that’s the iop way for ya lol).

Notice how neither Yugo nor Amalia has a ring for each other. Instead, they hold hands, symbolizing the union they have made between their people.

Third detail we can notice, there’s no priest. Unlike Dally and Eva who had the king for that, Yugo and Amalia did not choose anyone to begin the ceremony. They simply addressed their union by themselves.

Fourth detail we can notice is the audience. Compared to Dally and Eva’s wedding, the audience for Yugo and Amalia mainly consists of their friends and family. The others are the elite eliatropes and some sadidas.

Because of those stark differences, it’s clear to see that the ambiance in Yugo and Amalia’s wedding is far calmer and more private compared to Dally and Eva’s which is more public and much louder.

So now that we’ve got all the points that differentiate these two marriages, we’ve only got one question left:

Why are they different in the first place?

Dally and Eva are not royals and yet they seem to have filled all the boxes for having a perfect-looking wedding.

How did Yugo and Amalia, a god-king and a princess, manage to get a much simpler and calmer wedding compared to these two?

This wasn’t a coincidence. This wedding looks much smaller than what Dally and Eva had. According to Armand’s tree grave, which seemed to have grown up a bit, this suggests that Yugo and Amalia did have the time to prepare a bit more for their wedding but they simply chose not to.

In the special episodes, just right before Dally and Eva’s wedding had even been planned, Eva had specifically stated that no one bothers Dally for a week which implies that after that week of rest, these two must’ve gotten help from the sadidas to organize this whole event for them.

This means that Yugo and Amalia could’ve done the same thing and asked for something just as good, or better since they’re royals after all. But compared to Dally and Eva, they definitely had more time to ask since we know that trees don’t grow fast (I’m talking about Armand’s tree grave) and yet, it feels like they’ve just kept it simple.

But why?

My take on the matter is this:

Because Yugo and Amalia are not supposed to have a normal relationship. Therefore, everything they do usually strays away from anything remotely expected of them to have in a relationship.

For god’s sake, Yugo literally teleported him and Amalia AWAY FROM EVERYONE DURING WHAT SEEMED LIKE THE MIDDLE OF THE CEREMONY.

Their public wedding was specifically a political one. Which is why it would explain the lack of rings.

It was a happy political wedding however since Yugo and Amalia do harbor feelings for each other (suppressed feelings that they are now free to let out of course). But that’s when Yugo completely surprises Amalia, along with the others, when he brings her up in the skies, taking her away from everyone.

That sly dummy wanted her all to himself.

The wedding was so unconventional and they knew it. But they did not care. As long as they are together, they’ll be fine. After waiting for so long and finally having each other, properly planning their wedding doesn't seem as important anymore.

That’s why the ceremony was so different compared to the Percedals.

Note: Eva and Dally’s marriage was such a classic that Eva even had to wait for Dally to propose to her when she could’ve just been the one to initiate the first move. She even knew that Dally had been planning on asking for her hand and she deliberately waited. The only thing that isn’t considered classic in their marriage was getting children before the wedding lol

[mulletmitsuya]

Toman groupchat

Warnings: swearing, suggestive, mentions of poop, mentions of homophobia (joke), mentions of men getting pregnant

Desc: here the boys discuss whether men can get pregnant or not and other shenanigans. this also very fucking stupid

Mikey: i just took the biggest shit

Mikey: you guys will not believe the sheer size of this thing like it's as big as my forearm

Mikey: makes me wonder how women give birth

Kazutora: ?

Draken: keep this shit to yourself what the hell is wrong with you

Mikey: how can i keep this shit to myself when i've already flushed it down the toilet🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

Mitsuya: what does you shitting have to do with women giving birth?

Mitsuya: never mind shouldn't have asked

Mikey: well the poop tore my butt up so imagine what babies do to vaginas

Baji: this is why i'm never giving birth. looks too hard

Draken: ...you're not a candidate to do so? you're male?

Baji: what does my gender have to do with giving birth

Draken: it has everything to do with it??? what are you talking about

Baji: wow didn't know you guys were so sexist

Chifuyu: Baji-san, gender and sex are two different things...

Baji: ?

Chifuyu: sex is your chromosomes and basically what you were born with and gender is what you identify as. so since you're male, you don't have the reproductive organs to get pregnant and have a child. only female bodied people can.

Smiley: bro you're 17 how the fuck do you not know this

Baji: never been good at biology

Smiley: you don't have to be good at it to know you can't get pregnant💀

Baji: so men can't get pregnant?

Chifuyu: well if someone born as a female transitions into a man, then gets pregnant, we can pretty much say that men can get pregnant

Baji: so men can get pregnant but not males?

Chifuyu: yeah i guess

Baji: interesting

Baji: i don't think anyone's tried hard enough

Baji: i'll get a male pregnant one day, watch

Mitsuya: wtf

Draken: is the biology lesson over?

Mikey: my ass still hurts i think i'll need ointment

Kazutora: why r u reporting this to us

Mikey: you guys are my friends

Mitsuya: no ones wants to know about your bowel movements

Baji: why do you always wanna sound smart Mitsuya. just say shit or shitting

Smiley: watch, next time he'll say defecation

Chifuyu: excretion

Mikey: excrement

Kazutora: fecal matter

Draken: guys what the fuck can we not talk about this? it's fucking gross

Baji: oho here comes the fucking poop police

Kazutora: instead of his siren going "wee woo wee woo" it probably goes "pee poo pee poo" lmao

Mikey: LMAO😭

Draken: what are you a bunch of 5 year olds??

Baji: we're 17

Draken: 😐

Mitsuya: can we change the subject? christ

Smiley: i did crack for the first time yesterday. shit was crazy

Mikey: YOU DO DRUGS???? BRO

Baji: yo Nahoya what the fuck

Draken: we're not supposed to do drugs

Smiley: who's we?? i'm doing them not you🤨??

Draken: and what's Angry gonna think?

Smiley: he doesn't need to know. and i did it to impress a girl so chill it's not a regular thing

Mikey: why would you try and impress a girl with doing crack?

Smiley: she's a drug addict

Smiley: but the sex was fire tho even though she tried to kill me halfway through

Mikey: YOU'RE HAVING SEX??

Kazutora: that's not fair☹️

Kazutora: where are you meeting women?

Smiley: outside

Kazutora: oh

Draken: why did she try to kill you?

Smiley: halfway through she started choking the shit outta me while she was on top and i almost died but also it was the best nut i've ever experienced so it's a win win

Mikey: that doesn't sound appealing at all😭

Draken: that sounds like assault actually

Smiley: idgaf a beautiful woman can do whatever she wants with me and if she wants to kill me then so be it (i'm a feminist)

Mitsuya: yeah but like, she should have asked

Smiley: we were both high off our rockers

Draken: yeah i feel like she should have asked you so you could have developed a healthy sex dynamic where you both share each other kinks before hand

Baji: oho here comes the fucking sex police

Kazutora: this time the siren would be men whimpering

Chifuyu: why men?

Kazutora: i don't think Draken would use women moaning cause of how the brothel might have traumatized him i think and he respects women too much

Kazutora: also he's gay

Draken: fuck off i'm not

Draken: and Baji say something else i dare you

Baji: what are you gonna do? have sex with me?

Smiley: you're all taking this way too seriously😁

Baji: with what Kazutora said, i'ma start blasting whimpering audios when i get a car

Mitsuya: i'm pretty sure that's illegal or something

Smiley: dawg no one wants to hear that

Baji: who wouldn't want to hear men whimpering?

Baji: especially the high pitched ones

Baji: cause you can associate them with twinks

Baji: with dual coloured hair, jingly earnings and large unsettling eyes

Baji: and maybe even a blonde with an undercut and big blue cow eyes

Kazutora: Baji what are you on about

Chifuyu: wait are you being serious or is this a joke Baji-san 😂😂😂😂

Draken: uhh

Smiley: i keep hoping you being gay is a joke but then you say shit like this

Baji: why

Smiley: i'm not fond of gay people

Baji: homophobia's got you missing out on some good head

Draken: we support and respect all identies, Smiley. don't make this a problem

Smiley: i'll ask again, WHO'S WE?

[gigisdoll]

Cw: noncon, dubcon, blackmail, murder, blood,somnophillia

Pairings: g!p serial killers!winrina x naive/gullible!fem reader

The horrified screams were heard all throughout your neighborhood and yet the killers have yet to be found.. When the school caught up on the news they pointed fingers towards multiple people, including you now obviously you didn't do it? But your schoolmates never listen! As they called you mean names, pushed and shoved you around there were only two people that you sort of hang out with you! But to your surprise they were... Two of the most popular girls in the school? Why would they hang out with you?

Paranoia spread all over you... Why were all the murders linked to you? Everyone who was killed was associated with you in the past, like past girlfriends, ex friends or even ex crushed you thought no one knew about but everyone knew... You were too obvious you liked them, and they did not like that! They couldn't bear to watch you throw heart eyes at girls who would throw your likeness awayso the next best thing Karina and Minjeong thought of was well... Getting rid of the competition! Yeah!

"Y/nie we promise you're safe with us! You'll never have to worry about anything harming you while you're with us.. " Minjeong told you while you sat atop of her, some may say this isn't normal in friendships like yours but you find it completely normal! Or that's what Minjeong and Karina tell you... Friends do kiss each other right? That's what they do to you, you're new to this whole friend thing so you don't really know they say it's some sort of courtesy? Well what reason would they have to lie to you? "Y/n you know we'll never let anything hurt you right? " Karina said comfortingly "Mhm" you nodded, not a thought in your head.. Why would you have one anyway? when you could rely on them instead..

Karina and Minjeong were incredibly strategic, but god was it hard to decide if they should kill u or not, u were always soo loopy and out of it, sometimes barely being able to think! They just agreed not to! I mean... Why waste such a cutie like you right? You were also so gullible too Oh..! The red stuff? Nah... It's just ketchup we swear! And.. The knife..? Uhm we were making homemade ketchup don't worry! Of course you believed their awfully made up lies!.. Why wouldn't you...?

The night where they snuck in was eerily quiet. Way too quiet for a neighborhood full of teenagers, whose only hobbies consisted of gaming, making loud noises and ding dong ditching. You were paranoid, as anyone would be. Any noise was amplified by 10 to you, and small movements would suddenly startle you. Well at least you locked the doors and windows... Now no one can get in without you knowing! Of course like the naive girl you were, you gave a copy of your key to Minjeong and Jimin cause they convinced you they would need it in the most dire of situations. They didn't. Obviously. But they were your friends they wouldn't... Would they?

Deciding you needed a good night's rest to just shut off with all the paranoia built in you, the lights shut off, the doors checked, as well as the windows. You were ready to go to bed, and sleep the night away, and you did just that as soon as your head hit the pillow, you were fast asleep. And they were still wide awake, peeping closely at you, why'd you have to give them the key? Now you're in a situation where you can't get out of, let alone know about. Karina and Minjeong were well versed in your home, so much so that they knew which floor board would make a creak and ones that won't. Minjeong looked at your sleeping figure as you tossed and turned unable to really shake off the feeling of anxiety within you... But don't worry... They'll help!

In the state you were in was incredibly vulnerable, as it was also already established you were much weaker than the pair... Once it was a joke. Now it's very much not.. With a pair of hands traveling down to your pretty pink panties and another pair going up to your matching bra, they were scared you'd wake up. Not because of the fight you'll put up or the screams and cries you'll let out, it's because it's almost a guarantee you won't be alive if you do any of the two. Squirming in their hold you felt quite the bulge or... Bulges pressed up and grinding on both your back and stomach with a pair of lips kissing down on your neck making you whimper in your sleep, as Minjeong's hands held you down. Both your pants and panties were pulled down by Jimin's hands.

Your eyes' we're blurred as you stirred awake, and your arms tried pushing the two away, but too weak to actually do anything. Your limp legs trying to kick away the intruders "Y/n..." Someone in your left side said, oddly you were familiar with the tone. Something hard and warm pushed against the entrance of you and you squeaked, finally awake but unaware of who was doing this. Kicking and punching was obviously going to happen, but Jimin didn't care it only fueled her to push past the entrance and gasp as your warmth enveloped her. "Minjeong??" You cried out as your eyes adjusted to the darkness while you looked behind you, you were horrified! Jimin was bullying herself into your hole while her arms are wrapped around your waist.

Minjeong hushed you, as her dick slapped itself on your mouth as it dripped with pre. "Suck. Or you'll know what'll happen otherwise. " you knew what she was referring to, you knew whatever dirt she had in you had to be bad. With tears in your eyes you opened your mouth and an intrusion immediately inserted itself inside as Minjeong groaned out as your mouth was insanely warm "Fucking hell y/n..." Jimin bit her lip as she starting pounding inside of you. More tears flowed from your eyes as the pain settled in of Jimin pounding straight inside of you "We are sorry but we had to do this... " "We didn't want to kill you, unless you just want to disobey us? " you didn't know who was speaking the pain [and pleasure] taking over all your senses, just nodding and suckling on Minjeong's cock "That's a good girl" Jimin spoke drilling herself inside of you faster "Such a pretty girl, with pretty tears"

Your face was red and stained with tears while your eyes were wet and shameful, Minjeong almost moaned at the sight of you being so obedient to them, along with your disheveled state it was hard not to squeal at the cuteness. You hoped they would be done sooner or later, only wanting to simply sleep, as soon as the pair shot out their loads you blacked out completely, the pleasure being too much to handle. Maybe tomorrow you'll wake up more refreshed to take their cocks :)

-

[fleurriee]

 Ummm Hi I'm sending in this request before the population of fandom for avatar dies out completely can I ask for something that is so cute. Like shy reader who really likes neteyam but is to nervous to ever say anything about it and she's kind of singled out a lot and has little friends ( but her and neteyam are cordial with each other ) She goes to a gathering and is the only one who notices that neteyams stress and frustrated despite the festives and approaches him shyly with an offer to help “ i just want to be used by you tonight. can i be your personal toy? “ pls considered and thank you for still posting avatar also your a great writer

wooooo to be the one to help nete relieve some stress.... i loved this one, so thank u for sending it in!! hopefully the population of the fandom doesn't die out too much lmao... but, tysm, ily anonie <3

pairing ; neteyam x fem!reader

summary ; you take in into your hands to help neteyam relieve some of his stress and frustration.

themes ; talks of smut, tiniest amount of fluff possible, shy!reader/lonesome!reader

You’ve never been good with friends.

After all the time, you guess there’s just something about you that rubs others the wrong way, causing them to flee in the opposite direction quickly, before you can attempt to cling on to them.

Maybe that was it - maybe you came off too desperate, wanting just one friend who understood you completely, who would be by your side for all the good and bad. Maybe you were seeking it too eagerly; maybe you just needed to let it happen gradually.

The closest you’d got to a friend was arguably Neteyam Sully, Toruk Makto’s eldest son and future Olo’eyktan of the clan. But, the most you’d even really been was cordial with him, smiling and greeting one another in passing. Still, he was the only one who would meet your eye for longer than two seconds.

A part of your brain raged at you that it was just him being nice, just him wanting to make a good reputation for himself, seeing as he would be leading all of you when the time came later on down the line. And, that did make sense, but your optimistic side, the one that won out more often than not, told you he might secretly enjoy your company, that he didn’t just think of you as another random Na’vi.

You kept that particular thought in your head every time you looked in his direction… more so than ever now that the gathering was in full swing.

So much was happening, you weren’t entirely sure where to look - Na’vi were lingering within every corner of the surrounding area, each of them chattering away to their own family and friends, boisterous laughter spilling from them until you couldn’t even hear yourself think.

Making your way around people, trying your best to not bump into anyone and apologising to those that you did, you let your eyes flicker around to whoever they did. Your parents had actively forced you further out into the open, hoping that by doing so, it might help you interact with more Na’vi that were your age. But, looking out at the sea of people now, you couldn’t help but believe there was no worse idea than this one.

And, then, your eyes flew over him - Neteyam Sully. He’s standing towards the edge of the entire crowd, all alone as his own gaze flickers across everyone. His arms are crossed over his chest, and his brows are pinched, eyes slightly lowered. Even from a distance, it’s obvious he’s not enjoying himself.

The stress and frustration is emitting from him, lingering within the air and filtering within your own system, until you feel like it’s your job go to comfort him. Maybe this was the opening your parents had wanted for you - maybe you should take it with both hands and run with it.

So, with your heart on your sleeves as it pounded within its ribcage, excitement pounding within you at the thought of your offer you were going to give him, you made your way over to him.

He hadn’t noticed you coming until you were stood just in front of him, a shaky smile on your lips in spite of your nerves. When he spotted you, you noticed his shoulder had relaxed a little, looking down upon you with a welcoming smile of his own. “Hey…”

“Hi,” you spoke quickly, trying to muster the courage you needed for this next comment of yours, knowing it would definitely help him relax, “you didn’t really looking like you’re enjoying yourself…”

Neteyam chuckled at your words, shaking his head, but still looking fondly at you. “You could say that.”

Swallowing deeply, you sent him another timid smile, fingers beginning to fiddle with one another and stepping closer to him, making sure only he could hear your next words. “Well,” you started, “why don’t you… use… me?” you paused, gauging for a reaction, watching his ears perk up extremely high on his head, his tail starting to flick. “I mean, you can take it out on me… I can be your personal toy…?”

Your last sentence came out as more of a question, swallowing your heart in your throat. Just seconds away from deciding to turn back with your tail between your legs and embarrassment flushing your cheeks, he reached out for one of your arms, licking his lips and putting his fangs on display. There was a new twinkle in his eyes now, one that definitely had your stomach tingling with further desire.

“You gonna let me fuck you, pretty girl?” he asked, voice suddenly rough and low in comparison to the happier one he’d had earlier.

With a tight grip on your wrist, not letting you even think about leaving him now you had him excited and aroused, you knew you’d made the right decision to finally come out of your comfort zone and wrap yourself lovingly around Neteyam Sully.

[py-dreamer]

So... I know I'm late...

But yea! I said I was coming back with some stickers and I kept my word! I would've hoped that I could've completed the sheet in like a day but as you can see...that didn't work out

I know I've been a bit MIA lately but burnout sucks. I do have a lot of WIPS I really want to work on but again, it seems that the ProcrastiNation hath struck my feeble mortal brain again.

But anyways:

I headcanon Aroace Mei, just a personal headcanon (disagree if you like) I also like lesbian Mei but thought I'd give some aroace appreciation

Silktea was only given 1 episode but OH BOY did it fuel our wild shipping habits. And I jumped on the bandwagon. It's a reference to that scene in She-Ra where Scorpia tells Catra she 'didn't want to do this' then wraps kitty up in the blankey and cradles her like a wee baby. And Sandy would do that for any friend, I will die on this hill

Saw a fanart where Mk had a pig nose themed pacifier and I just yoinked that idea. The pig hoodie and the pacifier seems like something Tang would do for Pigsy (also to get away with free noodles cause who can say no to that face?~)

Mac showing Wukong the lantern. What can I say, mans' fascinated by them pretty lights. Though our little performer's eyes seem to be straying from the show (^u ')

I know many people have issues with shipping with Nezha and such and I know the two had a rough history but y'know what fans do; they love to make the people who kill each other soulmates (platonic, romantic or otherwise) Even if it wasn't romantic, I still love the idea of them being buddies and just chilling, the danger noodle prince and the angy prince snuggle and watch a movie (mainly from Nezha 2019 but I also saw New Gods and can I just say, I want those two twinks to bicker then kiss awkwardly and I want Yun Xiang to BEAT. HIS. ASS) but in case anyone asks, I do perceive Nezha to be a consenting adult in general outside shipping drama and if the two are adults, it does make my heart squeal when I see these two hold hands and whatnot

HOW COULD I EVER FORGET MY SPICYBOIS, inspired by that one Ponyo kiss scene. I was actually gonna make a bigger piece but then I saw someone do it already in a much better fashion than I ever could and I just gave up on the idea but Ig here, its just like the two cakes mentality and I gave it a go. Hope I could do the concept justice

Have spider queen or scorpion queen ever interacted before? No. But they are both queens and I believe Spider Queen's confidence could rub off on Scorpion Queen and she'd appreciate the company of Spider Queen's children henchmen. Also she give yummy food so lesbian venomqueens for the win

Redraw of that moment with Peng and Azure. I normally detest that bird but these two do get some gears grinding and whatever anyone says. Neither of those two are straight. I'll tell ya that.

Toxicinsanity is another rarepair that had like 1 sec screen time. I don't think they'd ever work out in canon and had virtually no chemistry. I still love all the fluffy ship content I can find of them though and if it ever were to happen. I think the mayor would scare the sh!t out of Syntax

Let's get at least one hetero couple here, Chang'e and Hou'Yi are a couple of favorites ngl, I took most of their outfits from Over the moon cause both of them looked stunning, Chang'e especially. I've seen people ship mah girl with other people and while I do agree it's healthy to move on, in my heart she will always long for Hou'Yi

Also irl, on valentines, my mum took us out for lunch, she treated us to bubble tea and donuts. We walked home so I waited to drink mah drink in my room while I drew and I accidentally finished it all... I'm so sorry mum

f*ck I forgot ironbull. Uhh....I'll draw something later, rn I need to go to bed before I get yelled at...

click pic for less sh!ty quality!

[grapejuicestyless]

conrad and fem!reader were bestfriends growing up but they were always in love. (reader is a conklin) they were both in love but they were both so oblivious to each others love (Susannah always knew hehe) I was thinking this could be inspired by ‘back to you’ by selena gomez

basically when susannah dies conrad lashes out on yn and says like the worst thing you can think of but then tries to kiss her and yn is so freaked out that they don’t see each other for years. After yn finishes college everyone reunites at the summer house and Conrad and yn finally realize what’s been right in front of them.

i know this is a lot but your writing is so beautiful especially with Conrad. thank u <3 🙏🏻

Back To You

Conrad Fisher x fem!reader

Angst to fluff

Summery: The request above^^^ I tried to stay as close to what was requested I hope this is okay! <3

The waves hit the wooden poles underneath our feet in a soft pattern. The thrashing of them shaking the dock just enough that you could feel it rocking. It was calming, breaking the silence that settled between my oldest son and I. Conrad had been off all spring, part of me connected it to his old ex girlfriend breaking it off with him, but that was just what I told myself because the thought that Conrad knew what was going on, something I swore I would keep hidden until it had to be know, made me sick with guilt. How my condition was weighing him down.

I took him out to the old dock just for one on one time. He used to love it out here at night. The way the stars illuminated the sky in their different patterns, the way even with them shifting, the constellations always found their way to stick together in the sky for a few weeks at a time. He loved the feeling of the damp wooden bench beneath his legs and how close we could cuddle up out here. He always loved it just being us.

“What’s going on, Connie?” My words were soft, in no way pushing him to open up any fresh wounds. He seemed wound up, his light dampened. I wanted to figure it out, I wanted to help him. The Conklin’s would be down here by morning and I worried that if left unresolved, it could bubble into a mess.

“Hm?” He acted confused, completely unaware to what I meant. I knew my son better than that though. He was always far too smart to play dumb.

“What’s got you down?” I put on my best smile, trying to squint my eyes to make them as welcoming as I could. My Conrad was never the most open with his feelings. He hated to be vulnerable. He told me once when he was younger that he felt if he was ever truly honest, the words would never be able to have been taken back. By saying things he didn’t say, by pushing people away, it gave him a good distance to build up the courage to make amends again. It gave him the time to choose when he was ready to open up his heart to whoever he wanted. He was always so conscious with things like that. Always thinking things through before doing them. It was funny how much a contrast he was with his feelings compared to Jeremiah. My spontaneous son who had no fears about regretting anything. Using his charm to get his way through life.

Laurel once joked that she believed Conrad’s eyes were so much darker because they held much more fear than Jeremiah’s. He was consumed by it. At the time we laughed, but now I was beginning to believe she was right. Here I was, preparing for a death nobody knew was coming and still, after nearly two decades of fighting and loving, I still was stuck at that distant arms length Conrad held me at.

He ignored the question, looking out to the sky. He knew he could’ve lied to me, could’ve made up something about his old heartbreak. How he was stressed with school. Anything to at least let me be able to give my support, even if it wasn’t in the areas he needed it. Conrad knew me like I knew him, though. Bound not only by blood but by love. There was no great excuse he could make that I wouldn’t pick up on. Mothers know everything, it’s our job.

My hands shook, partly from the cold and half from the disease working it’s way into my system. He shuttered sun my fingers wrapped around his, lips pressing to the back of his hand and my thumb smoothing over his skin to keep it stuck there.

“You don’t have to go through this alone, okay? When you feel like you need to say something, you don’t have to overthink it with me, okay? I’m your mom. I’ll love you no matter what’s going on in that mind of yours.” I saw the way his mouth twitched upward, a faltering smile so weak it was barely there. His eyes shinned in the moonlight, illuminated by the stars and the fireflies zipping by.

“Thank you, Mom.” He was honest then. I knew it by the way he said it. Like a weight was lifted off of his shoulders. He didn’t avoid my gaze, but held it firmly.

He crashed into me like one of the gentle waves into the dock. Arms wrapping around me in the biggest hug he’d given all year to me. His fingers dug into the back of my blouse, holding onto me for dead life in a way. He seemed desperate to be close to me.

A deep sigh left his nose, tickling the skin on my neck and down my back. I almost laughed at the feeling, but held it in to prolong the moment we were sharing. Soon, we would both be leaving whether we liked it or not, it was certain. I hoped that in the attempt to have one last perfect summer, Conrad and I could become closer. That we could all find a sense of happiness.

That sense came a few hours later. A wish being fulfilled without any extra begging. By now the moon was long gone, hiding beneath the horizon, the birds alive and singing. The children playing on nearby beaches and the whooshing of speeding cars passing the driveway.

Each part of the home was set up in the way I had hand picked it to be. My favorite flowers resting on the mantle and a bowl of the freshest fruits in the center of the kitchen countertops. The air was clean and crisp, blowing through the cracked window over the sink. It was cooling and refreshing, the outsides sounds seeping into the calm quiet of the house.

“They’re here!” My youngest shouted, heavy elephant feet stampeding down the stairs in pure excitement. I felt my own feet pick up from under me to jog outside. Summer was beginning.

The familiar silver car sat parked out by the bushes in the front, the engine still cooling and the sound of the car shutting off echoing through the area. The wheels moved from side to side, leaning closer to the ground to help give as the four missing pieces of Cousins announced their arrival.

Steven was the first to let his presence be known. His long, scrawny body stretching up after a long drive, an exaggerated groan becoming dragged out to truly emphasize how long their trip was. Jeremiah barely let him step away from the car before they were messing around, his arms wrapped around Steven in a welcoming hold. Their catching up was loud and joyful, jokes spewing off of their tongues without any extra effort.

Belly and Laurel came next, piling out of opposite sides of the car. Belly had occupied the passengers seat and Laurel the back right one. Both skipped the long stretch and made their way closer to their respected friends.

It was when Belly started making her way over to Jeremiah and Steven, giving an excited wave that I saw just how much she had changed. Her hair was longer, straighter. It fell just below her chest, shiny and thick. Her eyes seemed to sparkle brighter than last summer and her teeth had finally straightened enough to ditch the braces. It seemed like she was the center of attention for everyone because of these changes. Jeremiah swooning, hearts of eyes and Steven choosing to react in pure disgust, their playful teasing died down behind Laurels approaching voice.

“This has been a long time coming.” She sighed contently, arms already wrapping around me, feet in lifting from side to side to away smoothly. My hands rubbed along her back. She pulled away after a moment, observing the area, watching our kids. I saw her eyebrows furrow in confusion, almost like she was sad. I knew what it was.

Even in all this happiness, in all the reuniting and teasing, two very vital people remained missing. Y/n and Conrad.

While Belly and Jeremiah had an unbreakable bond that could carry any room, it never was really complete without Conrad and Y/n. To put it simply, even if Belly and Jeremiah were as great as they could be, Conrad and Y/n were the blueprint. They were the glue. No summer was truly starting until they were doing something irresponsible or stupid. One of them in a coughing fit, the other laughing themselves into one.

My lips drew themselves into a tight lipped smile, eyes finding the sky above. I swallowed. The words were in the tip of my tongue, the confession about what was happening with Conrad. What I believed was happening. I was getting ready to spill my guts about why Conrad wasn’t rushing out here. How he had been off all summer, and it was like he could hear me.

“Conrad!” The car door swung open so fast, I thought it might’ve snapped off with the force of it. It shook the car, slamming even harder than it had opened. The voice, still as sweet as I remember it being, belonged to Y/n.

She looked exasperated, hair a mess, cheeks flushed. Like she’d just woken up from a messy sleep. Her lips were bitten raw, and her shirt hung off her shoulder, unlike Belly’s that fit perfectly. But she was a ray of sunshine. She glowed like the brightest star in the sky. Her smile was infectious, spreading onto my best friend and I’s faces subconsciously. She truly captured the essence of pure happiness, the one I wanted so badly to feel this summer.

Heavy footsteps grew louder and louder behind me until a gust of wind was passed, the footsteps meeting their owner. Conrad, the moody, hurting boy who was completely shut away just hours ago was now running into the arms of his best friend. Of the girl he loved most.

They connected in the middle, the force of it making Y/n squeak. It didn’t stop them from tangling themselves up like they always seemed to do, Conrad’s back bent backwards and Y/n’s feet of the ground. They spun in circles, laughing the entire time. Even being limited to short glances at Conrad’s face while they spun, I could see the light in his face returning. The way his cheeks turned pinker and his eye bags seemed to get less heavy. He would never admit it, but it looked like he had gotten ready for her arrival. He no longer wore a plain grey zip up and old stained sweatpants. He wore Y/n’s favorite blue shirt he owned and matching shorts. She claimed he looked his best in that shirt because it fit him so well. Not too tight, but not too loose. He looked out together enough to go anywhere, but could remain comfortable. She’d even gone so far last summer to say it made him look handsome, something she confessed while drunk, clinging into her best friend and giggling under her breath.

I knew Conrad would never admit he chose the shirt just because he remembered that specific moment, but it was fairly obvious. At least to me. He always had the ability to pinpoint specific events, precise moments that involved something Y/n had done or said. He knew what she hated and what she loved. He put in more effort to make her see him than anyone else I’d ever known. It was endearing to see how much he cared for her.

More than that, it was like a storm had passed, Conrad’s grumpy attitude dissolving into one of pure sunshine and playfulness. He held no fear with her. Everything he did, everything he said, he knew it could be said with confidence. She was the one thing in this world he never felt ashamed to say what he needed to around. The only thing he never shared, his feelings. How he was so in love with her, his summers became dedicated solely to seeing her every second he could.

Secret sleepovers, long bonfire nights and early mornings on the beach. There was not more than a few hours that they weren’t together everyday. It was disappointing to see how he couldn’t share that, as Y/n so clearly felt the same for him.

Her eyes always looking for his face in a crowded room, her hands reaching out to feel he was there constantly. She needed him in more ways anyone could ever need a friend, she showed it, but they somehow always managed to shut down these feelings behind their insecurities of being wrong.

Jeremiah didn’t even get a chance to make his way over to talk with Y/n before she was being led away by his older brother, feet struggling to keep up behind him while he dragged her into the house. The thumping of their feet hitting the stairs sounded through the front door, their laughter and yelling echoing down the hall until his door slammed to a shut. I couldn’t help but laugh, Laurels own giggles stifled underneath mine. It was so obvious how much they cared for each other, yet so frustrating that they never acted on it.

The two of them always chased and chased, no aware that they were both aiming for the same thing. It was sweet to see puppy love like that. One so pure that they couldn’t even admit the feelings they so strongly felt for each other. Something they’d held since childhood, living in complete oblivion since.

The sun was high in the sky, a bright burning ball sizzling it’s mark into all of our skin. I could practically see Conrad’s shoulders peeling beneath its strong rays already. I had warned him to put on a rash guard, knowing he wouldn’t reapply. But he was so excited to catch up to Y/n, my words fell deaf on his ears. She was already out in the water with Belly and Steven, splashing around, laughter echoing as she grabbed what looked like mounds of wet sand from the bottom of the ocean to cover Belly with.

“Connie, you’re going to regret it later.” I had said, all to familiar with the distant sounds of his whining in the middle of the night. Conrad’s back sore and the aloe vera sticking to the warm sheets. But in that moment, the cringe worthy memory seemed to slip his mind as nothing was more important than getting to Y/n. He waved me off, promising to be careful but not really meaning it.

They were out there for hours that day. The waves were calm and the seaweed was relatively clear. The two of them, Y/n and Conrad, spent the perfect conditions submerged so deep into the water that when they reached land again, they complained how their legs felt like jelly. Conrads shoulders were bright red, torched by the beach day. I could see how they ached, just like I had said they would. Y/n’s cheeks and forehead were tinted a harsh red but she seemed completely unaware. Unbothered.

Conrad had pointed out how she had freckles on her face she didn’t have before. It was obvious how he thought she was beautiful, even then. I guess looking back on that memory, it was more clear that even at such a childish age, Conrad somehow always managed to pay the most attention to Y/n. Always the most observant of her tiniest details and mannerisms. Things he hadn’t even thought about in the others.

I didn’t let them sleep upstairs that night. I made sure to proclaim my love to them, but made it known I cherished my sleep more. Really, it was their own fault. Conrad had been warned to take precautions and those were blatantly ignored by the both of them.

I remember this day not because of how great the morning was, the summer breeze blowing in all its glory, but because of how the night had turned out to be.

The clocks hands were just passing the point that separated the late night and early morning. My blankets I had left for the kids spread across the large couch. The blankets were sticking to Conrads back and the aloe was rubbing off with each movement he made. I knew he was trying to muffle his whines, not wanting to be a bother, not wanting to wake his tired mother. I still heard it, and the rolling around became constant listening to the faint complaints from downstairs. It felt impossible to settle down at the time for Conrad, the soft melodic ticking of the kitchen clock only a reminder to how late the night was growing. Of how much time he had left before he was expected to be up and enjoying the day again. I remember feeling hopeless for him, he felt like crying.

It was the soft touch of fingers curling over his biceps carefully that pulled him from his descent into madness and silenced his cries. If it were anyone else, the sudden feeling of skin on skin would’ve scared him, sent him running upstairs into my arms like always. But the sensation was one he knew well. That and the shiny blue nail polish on her nails.

“Conrad, what’s wrong?” Her voice was soft, worrisome. It almost made him feel insecure, stupid in how he was getting ready to enter fourth grade and still couldn’t get over the ache of a stupid sunburn. Conrad should’ve felt pathetic, in his eyes. If it were Belly, or Steven or even Jere, he probably would’ve. But this was Y/n. His best friend! He knew he had nothing to be embarrassed about with her, she would never judge him.

“Is it your sunburn again?” She knew the answer, but always wanted to make sure. All it took was the slow nod of his head for her to lift herself off of the makeshift bed she’d made on the couch, the soft padding of her sock clad feet becoming more distant the farther she went into the house. In that moment, he felt confused, wondering if she was leaving him too. If his whining was even too much for her.

But, no. She came back with more aloe vera. A new bottle from the very back of the fridge. Conrad remembered how gentle she was when putting it on his back for him. It was feathery light, pressure changing depending on how severe the burn was. Even at such a young age, Y/n knew just what Conrad needed to make him feel better. It was like her sixth sense. Conrad had told me that morning, his heart couldn’t help but warm at that idea. That she had a special power just for him. He described it like waking up from a hazy dream.

A realization dawning on him after it had been forming for years. Y/n wasn’t just some girl Conrad enjoyed spending all my time with because she was simply just his best friend, but because deep down he loved her more than that. He knew he always felt something for her. Even when we were toddlers. The way she always shared with him, stuck by his side. At the time, Conrad acted annoyed by her presence, but he always secretly loved having her so close. He babbled about it in his sleep. He would slur how he felt safer, warmer, happier. Even his dumb little fourth grade self could see that those feelings weren’t ones someone had for a best friend. Those were feelings reserved for someone you loved. He knew then that he had always loved Y/n, now was just the first time he confronted those feelings.

When the sun rose, I was met with a goopy mess spilling all over the coffee table and a shiny back and Y/n’s wet hand. I could put the pieces together, but back then, Conrad made sure I didn’t have to.

That morning, while Y/n showered to get ready for the day, he went into depth about what had happened that led to the mess. How he felt, what was happening. At the time, I believed it was merely a small crush that he amounted to true love because he had never felt love before, but the longer I observed the pair, the more obvious it became that my little boy was in love with his best friend.

For Y/n, the day of realization came much later.

I remember the day clearly. Laurel and I had been insisting on a much needed a girls day, folding twenties into Conrad and Y/n’s palms and placing them in charge of the younger siblings of the bunch. Conrad being the oldest Fisher and Y/n the eldest Conklin, it wasn’t unusual that we would place our trust in them, tasking them with the job of keeping everyone in check for a day.

They’d decided to go to the boardwalk, the day too beautiful to not enjoy it. When arriving, the group had agreed to split up and conquer. Conrad would take Belly to the ring toss and Y/n would take Jeremiah and Steven to the go-karts. Everyone would meet back up in two hours for ice-cream and swap groups.

Y/n spent nearly all her money that day on those stupid go-karts. She’d only ridden them once, but Jeremiah and Steven kept begging to go again, again and again. Y/n was always such a softy, despite her confident exterior. Especially when it came to her younger friends. She couldn’t say no to them, they were just too convincing. When they met back up as a group, she complained, having a headache from the loud engines of the ride. She had eight dollars left in her pocket. Conrad had a large smile on his face and a polar bear named, Junior Mint, held loosely in his arms that he’d won after Belly begged him for it.

The looks on their faces made Y/n jealous, in a way. A feeling she knew shouldn’t be feeling when the situation involved her sister and her best friend. Two people she adored more than life itself. But Y/n, no matter how compassionate and understanding as she might be, like the rest of us, can’t control how we feel. We can only control how we reflect them.

“You have fun on the go-karts?” Conrad, who had somehow sensed her bad mood, had made race car sounds with his mouth, holding his arms out in front of him like he was turning a steering wheel in an attempt to lift it. Y/n’s hand hit his chest playfully, feet dragging along the wooden floor beneath their feet.

“The most.” She lied to him then, she wasn’t sure why. Maybe it was because she didn’t want him to feel bad for leaving her alone. She wanted him to be able to enjoy his day without having to worry about someone else.

When the time came to pay for their ice cream, it became apparent that the left over eight dollars would not be enough for three of the ice creams. Jeremiah and Steven insisted on getting the largest sizes possible, resulting in a grand total of almost the entire budget. Even if Y/n got a kiddy cup, she wouldn’t have enough to spend for a third cup.

Holding the money in her hands and looking back at the excited boys behind her, Y/n felt responsible to keep them that way. Happy. After all, she was the oldest. It was her job to look after them. To put their happiness above her own. She spent all her money on what they wanted that day, walking over to the table they’d picked over in the shade empty handed, disappointed in the lack of a cold treat to snack on after a long day.

Everyone was sat across from her, the table full of everyone except Conrad, who was ordering for him and Belly. Y/n’s hands became the most interesting thing to her for a brief period of time. The peeling paint on the table a good distraction from her two friends stuffing their faces with something she so desperately wanted.

“One vanilla ice cream cone for Belly!” She heard Conrad’s voice before I saw him. Her younger sisters eyes practically formed into hearts when he placed the dessert in front of her. He continued to announce the order.

“One mint chip for me and…” Conrad slipped a cup of mint chip ice cream in front of her next, the spoon lime green to match the melting treat below her.

“One for Y/n/n!” He sat beside Y/n then, mixing around the green ice cream until it turned into mush. Y/n lifted her eyes from the table to his face. It was stuffed with his own treat, a satisfied smirk directed towards his best friend. Y/n’s mouth was parted open, stuck like that for the longest time. It was only when Conrad had motioned at the ice cream that she realized it was still under the very hot sun, and melting more now.

With a silent whisper of a thank you, Y/n let the gift cool her down. It tasted sweeter knowing it was from Conrad, Y/n had confessed to me that night. Knowing that he cared enough to know how sad she would be to have been the only one without ice cream to finish off a fun afternoon.

He was always so sweet to her, always going out of his way to make sure she was included in everything. He didn’t have to, but he liked too. That’s what made Y/n like him the most. It didn’t matter what was happening, or who was involved. If Y/n was there, Conrad would be stuck to her side like glue, just like she was to him. He had some magic spell over her that no one else could even come close to.

Conrad always had a way to cheer her up, make Y/n feel like the most special person in the world. She never felt ashamed to be my most vulnerable self around him. He made her heart beat faster, her cheeks flush pink. He made Y/n feel pretty, wanted. More than that, Conrad never failed to give her butterflies.

These were all things she could connect with things someone could have with a best friend, someone close to them. She could convince myself as well as herself it was nothing more than that. Conrad was only a friend to her, but she couldn’t lie to herself anymore than she could lie to me.

Deep down, Y/n always knew she loved Conrad differently than everyone else. She could recognize his laugh anywhere, Y/n knew he had a lucky pair of socks and a least favorite pair of underwear. She knew he liked to part his hair down the middle, but how it trailed off to the left the further back it grew because he used to have a side part when he was younger. Y/n knew his glasses gave him a headache and how he didn’t really mind the feeling of sand stuck in his skin after a beach day. These were all things Y/n would’ve never given a second thought about with anyone else, but things her heart held onto like a prayer because it was Conrad.

Slowly but surely, she came to terms with my feelings developed for Conrad, ones I’d known about vaguely for years as the pair grew closer and closer each passing second since Conrad’s own revelations. Only, before, Y/n used to downplay them as a small crush. One she was developing because he was a boy and she was a teenage girl. She believed was supposed to feel like this, it would pass. But it wasn’t, and sometimes it felt to her like it never would. It grew more and more painfully obvious that Y/n’s feelings were so much more than that, and being in that moment then only solidified that fact. Y/n was in love with Conrad Fisher, her best friend, her world.

We were cuddled up on the couch when she talked to me about the day, the way her senses seemed to point overwhelmingly towards Conrad. I could’ve told her then that my son loved her just the same back, and maybe then they would’ve pulled together like a strong magnet, but I wanted them to find each other. They deserved to realize that through their own actions, not mine. So for years after that final confession, I sat here beside my own best friend wondering along with her when they would finally find each other.

“It’s cat and mouse with them every summer.” I sighed, holding my cup of coffee close to my chest. The warmth of the steam coming off of it warmed my skin in the cool July evening.

Laurel laughed beside me, her own mug clutched in her hands as well, we mirrored each other in looking out towards the back yard where Y/n and Conrad ran around in the grass with a deflated football. The smiles on their faces were vibrant, bright. Ones that only came out when they were together. They had that power over each other, to lift each other up. To make the others heart beat fast.

It was as clear as day what our oldest children felt for each other. No amount of deflections or excuses could hide the blush on their cheeks and the way their touches lingered for just a moment longer than friends should. They knew more about each other than anyone else because they cared too much to not know. It was pure and refreshing to see young love like this, even if neither of them knew what they had yet.

“When do you think they’ll realize what they have?” Laurel asked sincerely, her face turning to watch how my expression changed throughout my answer. She usually never played into my ideas, always being the more logical of the two of us, but this was the one thing we could agree on.

“With our luck, never.” We laughed, Laurels head falling to rest on my shoulder affectionately. We let out a synchronized sigh, allowing a beat of silence to pass.

“I’m sure they’ll find their way, they always do.” My hand rubbed my best friends arm in reassurance, my head settling on top of hers. I rested my weight on her, feeling more tired now that the day was ending.

It was almost comical, how ironic the entire situation was. The two oldest, smartest, strongest of the bunch, the ones who, other than Steven, had been the only ones to successfully apply and get into some of the top schools in the country, even with their brains, couldn’t figure out just how badly they wanted each other. Not even when it was dangled right in front of them.

I partially blamed myself. It was me who had ingrained the title, best friends, into their heads. With each time they were spotted together, with everything they set off to do together, I’d always stuck their names together with those two words. Even when it became more and more obvious that they were falling into each other in a way that crossed the line that divided platonic and romantic, it was always the two of them. The younger Laurel and Susannah. The next generation of best friends.

Conrad never managed to catch Y/n’s longing glances, and Y/n always seemed to just miss the way his hands held onto her in ways he didn’t with anyone else. He held her in ways best friends weren’t supposed to.

Lingering touches that mirrored her stares, fingers twitching, begging to be interlocked. Conrad spoke his feelings to her in acts of service, winning her prizes, helping her with her homework, reading to her when she had headaches, even when she was insufferable because she kept groaning. It was also in physical touch. His cologne practically stuck to her clothes permanently with all the excuses he could find to just touch her in one way or another. Y/n seemed to constantly be trying to relay the same in her own acts of service and physical touch. Holding the door, cooking him his favorite desserts without Conrad even asking, resting her head in his lap during movie night. Both slotting together to mesh perfectly, but their ignorance keeping them apart. If I were any less mature, I would’ve yelled at them to hurry up, I wouldn’t be here forever and I’d like to see my special kids happy before I went.

“What are you thinking about, Beck?” My own best friend asked softly, her head still under mine. I squeezed her arm, feeling sure that one day they would get together.

“How happy they’ll be once they realize what they have.” It went silent, but I knew my best friend. I could sense her tight lipped smile, eyes squinting and nose scrunching. He lifted her head from my shoulder slowly, her hand resting on my lower back.

“Why don’t we settle down for the night?” I wanted to fight her, I wanted to enjoy the calmness of the summer evening. The way our children were just what they needed to be, kids. No matter their age, still able to enjoy the simplicity that the summer home had to offer. But Laurel was right, I was feeling sluggish and if I didn’t rest soon, the couch would be my bed for the night. So I nodded, leaving the image of Y/n pinned under Conrad, his hands wiggling by her sides in an attempt to make her squirm and their laughter to be the last thing I would remember before I fell asleep.

“Con.” My voice was soft, the grass wet under our backs, dirt on our skin. He turned his head to face me, a lazy smile on his face. His eyes were all hazy, clouded by both tiredness and something unreadable that consumed his facial expression.

“Hm.” He hummed, eyes searching my face, lighting up when they settled on my own. I could feel the hair on his arms brush against mine, hands curled up, an indication of how close we truly were. Always just out of reach. My fingers twitched against the back of his hand, aching to be intertwined with his. My eyes flicked to his lips out of habit, breath hitching.

When I looked back to meet his eyes, I found the once playful look replaced with serious stare, burning straight into my head. He seemed stiff, nervous in a way. My cheeks flamed up in embarrassment. He must’ve seen the way I couldn’t pull my gaze from his lips. I breathed out.

“It’ll always be like this, right?” It wasn’t what I wanted to say, what I meant to ask. But in that moment, it was all I could manage. A simply vague question that held so much depth. I hoped he’d say yes, that we’d always be this close, not that we’d always be best friends. Selfishly, I hoped he said we would be more. That we could be so much more.

“You and me, always.” I felt the way his arm shifted from beside me, linking his own hands together over his chest and breathing out. He pulled his attention back to the sky, where the clouds moved faster than they did in June. The summer was ending.

“I wish it could be summer forever.” Feeling awkward being the only one to still be looking at him, I too turned to face the sky. Biting my lip, my eyes shut to imagine it was the beginning of the three wonderful months we had together.

I wished that I could have Conrad forever. That it wasn’t just some summer love that I would have to sit idly on as the seasons changed to a colder, more lonely winter. That Conrad and I could do all the things we always talked about over the phone together. Our cheeks would be rosy with the nip of the frosty weather and not because the sun had burnt us into a delirious mess. Groaning on the couch as we wasted our days away.

“Distance makes the heart grow fonder, Y/n/n.” He joked. Only, the way he said he sounded completely honest. Like he wasn’t joking. He said things like that a lot now. Things that were awfully romantic for someone who swore that we were platonic to all of our friends. It pulled in my heartstrings a little each time one of the phrases would slip. A source of joy for my daydreams to run on for the next few hours. If I were any more delusional, I would’ve told him how I felt about his jokes out loud. But I wasn’t, so I held them in. I let my heart face and my breathing quicken in silence.

“I hope you’ll be just as fond of me when you see me next, then.” I rolled to my side, countering his joke. I heard him laugh. My hands tucked under my head like a pillow and my legs bent at the knee. I made myself smaller next to him.

As our giggles died out, so did his interest in the clouds. He mirrored my position, hands under his head, legs bent up. Our knees touched, radiating a warmth that bounced between our body heat. My eyes were focused on him, but I was spacey. Thinking of just how long we’d be apart. It hurt my heart, I didn’t care if I would grow fonder of him. I didn’t think that was even possible with how much I loved him now.

“What’s running through that head if yours, Y/n/n.” His hand came up, pointer finger delicately tapping the top of my nose. I scrunched it under his touch, so light it tickled. My reaction made him smile again, even after his hand had returned back under his head.

“Thinking about how fondly I’ll think of you next June.” There were some things you just cannot speak about, can not share. I would never share what I was truly thinking about that day. How I was so stuck in my own feelings for him that I couldn’t even bare the thought of not having him beside me. That my heart deflated at just the mere mention of the winter because the only person I ever wanted to be around would be taken away from me.

Conrad’s laugh was weaker this time, smile fading into a smaller one but it was just as happy.

“I hope you’re already pretty fond of me, then.” I returned his smile then, the crinkle by my eyes moving a strand of hair into my face. It tickled my nose again, but I didn’t scrunch it. Too focused on Conrad so close to care.

Before I could respond, I felt the softness of his hand brushing across my face and tucking the strand behind my ear. He did it so gently, like I would break if he wasn’t.

“I am.” It came out breathy now that his touch was on me. He didn’t remove his hand from my face then. Instead, it felt more like he was molding his palm to fit my jawline. He cupped my face in his hand and just admired me. Eyes flickering around until they met my now moony gaze.

It was like some force was pulling us closer, then. Conrad’s face getting closer and closer, little by little. I couldn’t tell who was leaning in. It could’ve been me, but I was almost sure it was him. My eyelashes fluttered, fighting the instinct to close them. I heard how his breath hitched, I felt my own do the same. This was something I had always dreamed of happening, it felt unreal that now out of all times it would happen. I always dreamed of kissing Conrad in the beach, or the old dock where we used to play. Maybe even in the pool where we’d hold our fake Olympic competitions. But here we sat, on the grass, his breath fanning my face.

His head turned little by little, getting ready to connect our lips finally. The squeaky glass door slid open, and by some bad luck, it was enough to scare us into a more distant position. We sat up, now more than just inches away, searching the backyard for who had opened it.

Steven had been the culprit, having forgotten something on the small table outside. Looking beyond the pool, he found Conrad and I, red as can be, eyes wandering around and waved.

“I’ve been looking for you two! Belly wants to have one last movie night. Jeremiah’s making popcorn. Y/n, you’re on blanket duty!” He was completely oblivious to the tension between us. Of how my cheek, right where Conrad had been touching me was burning. How in my mind, it felt like he had left a mark with how hot it felt. I cleared my mind, shaking it off and looking to Conrad almost disappointedly.

To my surprise, he seemed perfectly fine, like nothing had just happened. He sprung to his feet, in fact, completely able to move on and ignore it. Maybe I had read it wrong. Maybe he wasn’t trying to kiss me. Of course I was, it would be stupid to believe that my best friend could really possess some sort of feelings for me. I had simply made it up, tricked my mind into believing it was true because I longed for him too much.

When his hands met mine to held me up, it felt like fire. Flames burning into my hands at how badly I wanted him. If he didn’t care, than I shouldn’t either. My stupid feelings shouldn’t weight down the last hours we’d spend together. It shouldn’t dictate how the last night will go.

I put on a brave smile, sticking a bandaid over the wound over my heart. I bled out on the couch, all over anyone near me. My smile false, heart heavy. I forced myself to forget it and as the movie grew longer and longer, it left my mind completely. Eyebrows feeling lighter, the burning in my throat releasing itself into a soothing sensation. It would be my last memory of the summer that truly stuck. How close I had gotten to Conrad, and how quickly he had slipped away. How wrong I was about how he felt. How hurt I was for believing it could be different.

What I didn’t know then was how he felt the same. How his mind was swirling with the what if’s and the same disappointment I felt. How my fake smile had tricked him into believing it meant nothing to me, like I didn’t understand the weight of the situation at all. He didn’t know how I was breaking inside at how he didn’t seem to care, because he was feeling the same. My own act was tricking him, allowing Conrad to believe just what I thought of him. That I did not care for him like he did with me. That his feelings weren’t reciprocated. It was a dance between us. Chasing in a circle to get the other attention, to figure out what was happening between us. Completely unaware that if we would just turn around, we’d find what we do desperately longed for. The other chasing the same thing. We let the incident go by the morning, pretending that whatever happened was all a dream. And just like that, we were what we had always been. Best friends.

The news came early in the morning. The sun hadn’t fully crossed the horizon yet and there was still dew on the lawn. I was alone then, away at college. The constant calls from my mother waking me up. But it was the one from Conrad that I answered somehow.

“Hello?” My voice was full of sleep, confused as to why my mom was calling me so early. I had an eight am that morning, I had my alarms set. It was all so confusing, hazy.

“Y/n.” His voice was shaky, weak. It woke me up quickly. Conrad was never like this, at least not over the phone. Occasionally he would breakdown around me. The tears always stung. So full of emotion, so overwhelmed to the point he couldn’t keep it together. All it took was someone to ask if he was really okay to tip him over the edge. To open the flood gates. It only happened at the worst of times, it was alarming that it was happening now.

“Conrad, are you okay? What happened?” I knew something bad had to have happened. This wasn’t simply just him calling because of how much he missed me. Those calls came later at night on FaceTime, his voice light and playful each time. This was heavy, I couldn’t see him, he was hiding behind the phone call. I knew it had to be bad, already packing a bag as he spoke. The phone was pressed to my ear by my shoulder and head, I worked on stuffing as much of my clothes in as possible. I made sure to scribble a note down to let my roommate know I was leaving and would be back in a few days.

“It’s my mom.” The world stopped in that moment. I knew I had to get to him even quicker now, I knew he needed me to talk to him, to walk him through his grief but the news was so heavy, my hands stopped working. I froze, unable to do anything but pray that it was some sick prank.

“What?” It came quiet, I wasn’t sure if he even heard me. She wasn’t my mom by birth, I didn’t carry the same relationship to her as Conrad did. I didn’t see her everyday for hours, but in some way she was my second mother. She taught me to ride a bike, how to bake a cake. I learned how to read from her, her name was the first word out of my mouth. She was the grounding in my life. The one person I trusted to share everything because it was likely she’d already been through it. She understood like a mother, helped me grow as one. Her death would leave an empty hole in my heart for eternity, I was sure.

I heard Conrad take a shaky breath, holding it while he tried to piece together what he had to say. What I deserved to know.

“It happened this morning, just an hour ago. I wasn’t going to call so soon but, I thought you deserved to know. She was special to you, so…” He tried to keep it together, I could feel it. I could hear it. How his breaths caught in his throat, the quiet stutter beneath his words.

“Conrad, I…” In looking for all the words I wanted to say, to tell him it would be okay with, I came up short. Unable to make some sense as to what was happen.

“You don’t have to say anything. We all knew it was coming soon.” He dismissed my struggle, knowing that if it were hitting this hard on his end, he could imagine that I wouldn’t take it very week either.

“Yes but Con, that doesn’t make it any better.” I ran a hand through my hair, placing the phone tightly between my shoulder blade and my ear. I began to pack again.

“Do you need me to come down to Boston?” I would’ve come down on my own, would’ve held him like a brother, protected him from the world, the reality of it all. But it was a delicate situation. I had to walk on eggshells, unsure of what was best. I had never lost a relative before, never endured the pain of not having a mother. Never seeing her again like how the Fisher brothers just had. I didn’t know if it was best to stay or go.

“No, no.” Though it sounded like he was lying, like part of him wanted me to just be there, his words were firm, exhausted. If he wanted me there, I would come, but I would not intrude when times were so tough.

The line went quiet for a moment, I can still hear the static ringing through my head even now. How the line went just as quiet as the dorms when everyone was asleep. I could feel the hot liquid trailing down my cheeks, the tightening of my chest becoming more rapid the longer we both stayed quiet.

“Listen, I’ll call you later when I know more, okay?” I nodded my head, only realizing a moment later he couldn’t see me. I took in a deep breath.

“Okay, yeah.” He mumbled a quick goodbye, hanging up the phone and leaving me alone to grieve. The once cheerful morning turned grey with sadness, clouds looming as a reminder to the sunshine we had lost that morning. The dew turned into mud and the plants wilted. My bag was packed in minutes after the call ended, bag slung over my shoulder.

Conrad didn’t want me there, and that was fine. But my mother was at home, sitting with only two thirds of her family who were probably all unaware besides her. If Conrad didn’t need my shoulders to lean on, my mother did. She knew Susannah longer and truer than any of us had. The pain she must be carrying could only be indescribable to her. So if I wasn’t leaving for the Fishers, I was for her.

I never got that call from Conrad, not even a text. As I laid in my childhood bedroom, eyes glued to the ceiling and the silence of the household drowning me in my own self isolation, I didn’t even wonder why. For the first time, my life didn’t revolve around Conrad, on how he was doing, what he was doing. I didn’t miss him anymore. Not because the hurt of him not being here was any less, but because the pain of his mother never coming back being worse. It canceled out and an extreme numbness took over. I felt nothing. I had cried all my tears, screamed into my pillow until my voice gave away. My knuckles hurt from how hard I gripped the steering wheel on the way home. I had already lost it and now I had nothing else to give.

…

The funeral was a week later. Not much time to process such a heavy loss. Adam wanted me to speak at the funeral, he knew how much Susannah meant to me, but I couldn’t do it. Walking up to the podium, I couldn’t say her name. Even if it were just a practice run. My voice ran dry, eyes wet. Staring at her photo by the alter, all I could do was shake my head. I felt ashamed that I couldn’t do what her husband wanted for her. I felt embarrassed I couldn’t help the family who was going through so much still. They claimed they understood, but the guilt loomed.

We sat three rows behind them. Strangers separating us. It made me angry. If not us, the ones who spent hours on hours together, at least my mother deserved to be sitting in the front row with the Fishers. She was a sister to Susannah. She was just as much of a family as they were. I kept my mouth shut, my eyes down. The family took turns speaking, each sentence summarizing her in the most beautiful way possible. Some old friends spoke in her honor too. It felt wrong then, how people who barely knew her could stand up there and act like she was their greatest gift.

When it was Conrad’s turn, he sung a song. In his pain, his voice failed him. Wavering and breaking through the song. He apologized, looking out into the crowd he met my eyes. I wanted to look away, not wanting him to see me so broken when I should be the one supporting him. But by looking into my eyes, even as teary and red as they were, he grounded himself. By the time he finished, the venue was silent, soft cries echoing from the back rows. Nobody acknowledged them out of the fear that it would cause them to breakdown again.

The silence carried over to the Fishers Boston home. Other than the adults mingling and the quiet chatter of Jeremiah and Steven, the room felt empty. It felt like a depressing party, one that was about Susannah, yet excluded her from it.

It was tiring, the whole experience. Always trying to catch up with how quickly everyone else was getting over it. I felt like a dead weight compared to Steven and Belly, who had already started coming to terms with it. I was the only one left living in denial. The only one still dreaming of epiphany’s to make some sense of it. To make the heartache more bearable.

I wore the dark eye bags and my salt tears like a tattoo, ones that had been permanently stained on my face since the news broke. It was obvious I wasn’t doing well. I had planned to go back to school after the funeral, seeking a clean space to cope. To get away from the constant reminders of what could no longer be.

Jeremiah said I looked too weak to be driving myself to school tonight. He set up the guest room for me, decorating it just as his mother used to. Even in my protests he managed to convince me. He told me how it was more for him than it was for me. How having me close made him feel better because it was like gaining a piece of him family back. Like having an older sister come home from college.

After that, I kept mainly to myself. Finding the emptiest rooms and sticking to them. I hid my face in my knees, soft cries coming in waves until I had nothing left to cry for. Alone, I sat in the darkness until the soft chatter died out and all distractions became a heavy peace.

“You should get to bed soon, Conrad, it’s getting late.” I forgot all about him, I realized. Not once having checked on him. It was only Adams soft suggestion reminding me of the other brother, who was probably taking the funeral even harder than his younger brother. Wiping my cheeks with the backs of my hands, I waited until the choking breaths turned into quiet sniffles. Until everything felt calmer, more collected to see him. I wanted to be able to be there for Conrad, even when I wasn’t doing okay either. I wanted to—no. I needed to be strong for him.

I knew where he was, I could see the frame of his back hunched over on the couch. Head hung low and hands fidgeting around anxiously. It made me nervous.

I took the time to go downstairs then, only after I was sure everybody else had filed out of the house, leaving it looming with an eerie emptiness. There were leftovers on the table, one serving left, the rest already in the refrigerator. Adam had already cleaned away any evidence of Susannah’s death.

Taking what was left, I put it on a paper plate. My own stomach rumbled, being empty, but the starving feeling felt better than feeling nothing at all. I knew Conrad hadn’t eaten in hours, cemented to his place on the couch, he needed to eat. It could be considered a peace offering, a kind gesture. Something to maybe lift his spirits.

My hands were shaky, so I had to hold his plate with both hands. I leaned against the wall when I went back upstairs, I didn’t trust my footing anymore. I had to stop halfway up, take a deep breath and pull it together. Conrad needed me, I had to be there. I wanted to be there.

It was a soft knock that pulled me from my descent into a bottomless pit of sadness. My mind shook its self free, eyes fighting consciousness. I was ready to snap, irritated at my dads efforts of trying to move me from where I found some sort of comfort. Really, it wasn’t his fault. He was only a concerned father who wanted to help his son. But I wanted none of it. I wanted even more now than when my mom was alive to be as distant from him as possible. Unforgiving of his horrible mistakes that caused my mom so much pain.

The soft voice that spoke wasn’t one that belonged to my father, not even my brother who had a sweet voice saved specifically for moments like these. To ease the tension, calm everyone down. No, it was like honey. So sweet and gentle. So easy to listen to. I longed to hear more.

“Con?” It belonged to Y/n. My Y/n. The only person I hadn’t really seen all day. The only person I wanted to see all day. Instead, she had spent it making everyone happy with her. Tending to Jeremiah’s wish, staying with us overnight. Giving a loving hand to hold for Belly and Steven, calming down her younger sisters uneven cries and her brothers panicked breathing. She tried to get her mother to open up, but Laurel was like me. Stubborn. Even with her best efforts, she was locked out, leaving her to seek solace in the less crowded rooms upstairs. I wanted to come see her, but my feet no longer worked. My legs were jelly. I felt stuck to the couch. Too weak to keep moving.

I acknowledged her, mouth too dry to speak. She took it as a signal to sit down beside me. The plate in her lap was shaking like her. The food looked unappetizing, but I appreciated her effort. She pushed it towards me, a hand finding my back, she rubbed it like she had in the summer when I was drunk and clinging onto the toilet out of sickness.

Nodding my head, I accepted it only to place it on the table in front of me. I knew she knew I didn’t mean it as an insult, I just couldn’t eat right now. I just wanted her to hold me. I wanted to feel safe again.

So, I placed my head where I’d always wished I could. My ear pressed against her shoulder, hands glued to my lap, her arms wrapped around me out of instinct. It was so warm, so loving. It helped to heal the ache that was ripping through my heart slightly. My headache didn’t feel so severe with her close. She made everything better, just as she always did.

“Con, I’ve known you my whole life, you’re my best friend. You can talk to me. You can trust me, okay?” Her hands in my hair suddenly felt my poison. Little thorns poking into my scalp. The sour reminder that this hold, this closeness wasn’t reserved for me. I wasn’t hers, she wasn’t mine. It made me feel angrier than I should’ve. A mix of grief and disappointment mixing together into something she didn’t deserve. She was only trying to help.

Sighing heavily, I pulled myself away, standing up to create a distance that I knew she felt not only physically but mentally. A feeling of someone close to her becoming closed off to her, just as her mother had done earlier today. I couldn’t look at her. I’d spill everything.

“Conrad, no. Please don’t shut me out. Please, not now.” She was pleading with me, her voice shook slightly, it made my heart break a little, hearing how feeble she was feeling.

“Y/n, can you go please?” I didn’t mean what I said. I’d only done it out of my own petty desires. Hurting the girl I loved more than anything in this world out of my own selfishness. When we were both hurting the most. She didn’t say anything, but I imagined she must’ve shook her head. Her footsteps grew closer.

“No.” She choked out, “No, I’m not leaving you alone right now.” Y/n cared so much for me, she always did. She knew how to read me better than anyone else. She knew that even now when I was asking her to go, I didn’t mean it. I wanted her more than anything. Her knowing this overwhelmed me with a love that I misplaced, unable to cherish and welcome it due to my own selfish nature. Only ever knowing how to push away what was so graciously given to me. I decided to snap at her, make her leave.

“What do you get out of staying, Y/n?” My words were laced with venom, I turned around to speak to her now. Having already built up my walls to know I wouldn’t break. She was speechless, confused.

“I-I don’t…” She couldn’t find the words. Not expecting to be turned on so quickly when she was just trying to help, to be kind.

“God, you are so selfish. This is about you doing what makes you feel good, right? You don’t give a shit about me, Y/n.” I didn’t mean it. I knew Y/n was far from selfish. She was the most selfless person I knew. Always putting herself dead last to help everyone else thrive. She hated thinking she was one day going to be depicted as someone selfish, someone cruel. It was an insecurity I knew she had since childhood. So, in my own anger, I pointed my weapons at her deepest hurts.

“Con, no. That’s not true.” She was defeated now, lip quivering and face contorted into pure pain. I scoffed.

“You can’t even look me in the eyes when you say it. You don’t have to pity me just because my mom is dead.” I kept going, unable to stop now that I had started. I had already stabbed her, now I was only twisting the knife. I watched her eyes well up with tears, all glassy and red. Her lip quivered and her eyebrows pulled together.

“Fuck you Conrad!” It was unexpected. I hoped she would walk away, leave it be and blame it on my grieving, but I should’ve known better. Y/n was like me, stubborn. She was just as much of a fighter ad I was, kinder but full of anger just as I was.

“Susannah was as much of a mother to me as my own! You aren’t the only one grieving, asshole! I’m doing this because I care. I care Conrad, and I wish I didn’t because you don’t deserve it, but I do. And I’m afraid I always will. So…so don’t you disregard my sadness out of the spite of your own anger!” What started out so strong had faltered into a weak confession. She was looking at me in the eyes, finding it in herself to finally make eye contact, breaking the invisible barrier between us. We were chest to chest.

Even in her state, she was so beautiful. Like an Angel sent form heaven specifically for me. I couldn’t help the way my eyes searched her face. I felt confused, more overwhelmed now than ever.

A silence took over, heavy breathing turning into quiet huffs of air. Even, steady. We were so close, I could feel her body heat radiating onto me.

I opened my mouth to speak, I wanted to apologize but the words got stuck. I couldn’t convey what I wanted to tell her. How she meant the world to me, how she was the only person who I cared about more than anything. She was the only person I didn’t want to shut out, didn’t mean to shut out. I loved her more than anything I’ve ever loved and it hurt me to not be able to love her as more than a friend.

My fingers found her hand then, squeezing and pulling her fingers between my own. I held it there, by her side, trying to get her to understand. I heard her breath hitch, saw her eyes find my lips. They flickered back up to my face. I needed her badly then, I knew I couldn’t wait. She was right here, so willing to stay when I’d treated her so horribly. She saw right through me constantly, she stuck by me in my darkest storms.

I didn’t think about it when I did it. About how my leaning in, my effort to kiss her could’ve scared her away. I was blinded by want, by need. I forgot it takes two people to have something.

Y/n released a breath only to hitch it once again, moving back from where I leaned in, she lengthened the gap between us again. A soft whimper woke me up from my haze, her head shaking rapidly. She looked scared. But more than that, she looked guilty, hurt.

Susannah was dead, there was no way to avoid that fact. My mom was never coming back, and that alone broke everyone into tiny pieces. Knowing Y/n, I knew how complicated everything felt for her. She was grieving, hurting. Not even I could piece together what she was thinking.

“Connie.” Her second whimper of my name is the one that made me back away. It was then I saw what I had done. The girl I loved most was staring back at me with wide eyes, mouth open slightly and body shaking. More than that, she had tears streaming down her face rapidly. I had made Y/n cry. For the first time in my life, I had made my best friend cry.

My heart shattered at the realization. How I’d ripped her down, made her feel vulnerable and then went in to kiss her like it would cancel everything out. I moved back again, trying to find the right words to apologize with. A silence surrounded us, crickets and the late night breeze the only sounds filling the walls around us.

I watched her a step back, slightly faltering over the threshold of the doorframe. Her hand ripped away from mine quickly, leaving a burning feeling behind from where we were once connected. A pain that wasn’t real, but felt so. She began to walk backwards now, hands finding the hallways walls for support, her feet failing her.

“Y/n.” My voice was quiet, my feet cemented to the floor. She shook her head again, a sob racking through her body. It’s a sound I’d never heard before. One I hope to never hear again. I could see how panicked she was. How everything was just now catching up. Her feet move quicker now, seeing how I’m reaching out for her. She’s scared, how could she not be? We’d crossed a line that wasn’t meant to be crossed, one that was toed over during one of the most horrible moments of our lives.

She’s halfway down the stairs now, the thumping of her feet louder than the creaking of the stairs. Jeremiah sticks his head out at the sound, looking between her disappearing figure and my body stuck in the doorway. It’s then I realize she’s actually leaving. Not to find peace in the guest bedroom, but to go away for good. I’d pushed her away, why had I pushed her away?

I’m quick then, my feet finding the floor in front of me, I make a mad dash down the hall and around the old banister. It cried under my weight but I push through, desperate to reach her. I don’t care who I wake up, if my fathers mad. If he’d just finished crying himself to sleep. I’m shouting after Y/n, yelling her name like it’s the only word in my dictionary.

“Y/n!” My feet stopped at the beginning of the driveway. The space her car once occupied is gone, not even the distant sound of a car rushing down the street can be heard. She’s slipped away from me just as my mother had, leaving me completely alone.

I walked out to the street, trying to see if she had parked it elsewhere. She wouldn’t leave me, would she? Not after we’d promised we’d always be like this. So close, always together.

The street was empty, only the flickering street lights illuminating the dark streets. I felt defeated, broken. I had got what I intended for, but not what I wanted.

Y/n was gone like the wind, leaving me in the stillness of the night, overthinking everything that had led us to this tipping point. All the tension, all the build up just for the resolve to be our ending. I always dreamed of the day I could finally confess my feelings to her. Even if she didn’t reciprocate them, she would never be mean about it. We’d always be close, and that alone gave me comfort. Now, I wasn’t so sure. What should’ve brought us together in my head, the one thing I’d always dreamed about, had split us apart. It’s almost funny how it happened, when it happened. The two people I always saw myself standing next to for the rest of eternity gone within the same week. Unsure if seeing them again was even something that was possible.

In all the years I had ignored him, Conrad never stopped reaching out. Not until my Junior year. My phone was filled with unanswered messages that varied from topic to topic. He kept me updated even in my absence from his life, wanting to salvage the closeness we’d cherished when we were younger.

He told me how he was in therapy, a week later he told me how he’d stopped going. Not only because he felt like it was nearly impossible to open up to a complete stranger, but because going felt like another financial burden he was adding to his fathers long list of bills and soon to be debt. Conrad shared how day by day, the grief of losing his mother was getting easier to cope with. The happy memories of her having been around at some point fueling him each day. He felt grateful he even had the pleasure to know her so well. Call her his mother. He was going to school to become a doctor now, changing his major halfway through his freshman year because he wanted to help people going through what his mother was forced to endure. He wanted to save people, help them in ways he was never able to help Susannah. He had a good heart, an honest one. Yet, he never spoke of any new lovers in his life. He carried all these amazing qualities, but his heart still longed for me, the girl who had left and never looked back.

It had been just over three years since I’d walked away from Conrad. Three years since I’d seen him. I couldn’t even look at him through photos. I was grown now, but my heart still aches in the same childish way it did when the wound was fresh. He never brought up what happened after the funeral. It was like his attempt to kiss me didn’t exist, only adding to the hurt I felt. Only confirming what I believed from the beginning. Conrad Fisher hadn’t leaned in to kiss me because he loved me, he had done it because he was grieving and didn’t know how to feel. He didn’t love me like I loved him. He did it because I was always so easy. The lovesick fool who would do anything for him, even if it hurt me the most. Susannah had been so sure that he did love me the same, I almost believed her, but it was ignorant to buy into it when it was so obviously not there. Yet, I still felt a tingling sensation each time I looked back at his messages. I wondered if in the time he’d stopped talking to me, he’d found someone else to love and know like he did with me. I hoped that my replacement was beautiful, like a model on the cover of Vogue. I prayed she was smart and kind like Susannah. I hoped she was everything I wasn’t to him.

Deep down, I knew part of my attachment, my fixation on what he was up to was because of the messages. How no matter how wrong it felt, I continued to allow myself to be part of his life from a distance. Even if Conrad didn’t know it, I always cared. Always would. I told him that the day I left. It was fear that turned out to be true. A curse that kept me from finding that same love for anyone else. My heart belonged to Conrad Fisher, a boy who barely knew me anymore. A boy who I wasn’t even sure if I could consider a friend anymore. A boy I want to be able to call my friend again. I had been so resolute all these years in keeping to my word. That after that night, I would never come back. The last would stay just that, the past. It was never that easy.

Letting go of Conrad Fisher was more than only losing the love of my life. It was like throwing away the last pieces of a Susannah. Sure, I still talked to Jeremiah quite frequently. Our phone calls lasted for hours, he never failed to make me smile. But he didn’t have Susannah’s eyes. He didn’t have her blonde hair or her smile. He was a direct reflection of his father, other than his unwavering optimism. None of his features lined up in the same way Conrad’s did. He was her twin, in a way. Losing him felt like losing her all over again.

All I did was try, try, keep trying. I kept pushing until I had nothing left to give, a burnout who barely made it to graduation. No friends to stand with at the finish line. All in an effort to forget what was lost along the way. Losing Conrad made all my achievements feel unworthy. A deep depression looming deep in my stomach, waiting for the right moment to rise, swallow me whole. Not even seeing my family there, sitting excitedly in the folding chairs could lift my spirits. There were four empty seats beside them that shattered my heart. I could place a name to each one. Figure out who would sit where if they had shown. But that bridge was burned and it was my fault.

My fault for running away from the boy who adored me like no other. Who made me feel special. Who understood me like a lover. My heart felt empty, I couldn’t sleep at all that night. Not even when Belly had shared about her forming relationship with Jeremiah, not when Steven confessed he thought he might be marrying Taylor soon, he was ready to buy a ring.

Years ago, that would’ve been something that lifted my mood. Filled me with joy, excitement that my sister was finding her own soulmate in a close friend. How her heart finally beat for the one that was there for her the whole time. But like a train, it hit me that the connecting link between the Fisher family and the Conklin’s would no longer be Conrad and I like I always dreamed it to be. It would be Jeremiah and Belly. Steven’s upcoming engagement didn’t thrill me either. His healthy relationship only reminding me of the ones I lacked. Amplifying the loneliness I was already painfully aware of. All by my own doing.

I felt like I was crashing, listening to my family talk about how well they were doing. It was like they couldn’t see the downward spiral I was falling into. Becoming my worst self.

Going home to a house filled with tainted memories surely didn’t help. Nor did the bottle of alcohol placed in the middle of the kitchen table. Picking it up and drinking straight from the glass was bound to happen, I was hurting and it was my numbing solution. Years ago I had told myself I’d rather feel all the pain in the world than be numb when it came to Susannah’s passing, but now I wished I could take it back. Each drink hurt less and less. The tequila turned into water, my eyes hurt to keep open. I was a quiet mess on the couch. Unaware of anything really.

It was an issue how easily persuaded I was when drunk. In my sober state, I would have never agreed to Belly’s proposition. I would’ve protested, claiming I still wasn’t ready to face my issues. I wasn’t fully prepared to accept that Conrad never loved me, that it was his grief that made him want to kiss me. Something I loved with for years. But I wasn’t sober, and Belly’s argument that we’d be going down for the summer again because it would be what Susannah wanted had me packing a bag for the morning. Ready to go down to the one place I hadn’t been since Susannah still inhabited it.

I found myself hurting in the back of the car, aching, tired. The road underneath the wheels crunching and bouncing the car in a way that made my head pound. I laid my head in my moms lap, praying for it to all be over. Seeking the peace of stillness.

Susannah had once told my mother that she believed I was walking sunshine. A force that lit up the sky when I was around. Someone who’s smile was so contagious, even her brooding son couldn’t help but feel joyful around me. It felt like I was letting her down in a way. Now that everyone had moved on, had gotten better. I felt like an idiot being stuck on the past. What was worse is that I wasn’t sure if I was so stuck because of Susannah or because of Conrad. Both answers freaked me out.

“Y/n, honey.” Her voice was gentle, hands running through my hair. I felt a mess. Hair messy like a child’s, eyes wide yet so tired. My lips were wet with drool, cheeks rosy with the summer heat. My head pounded with a nasty hangover.

I knew what my mom was going to tell me. I felt the car come to a halt, the road turning sharply into a familiar driveway with even more familiar trees peaking through the window. I knew where we were. I wasn’t sure if I was ready, but I knew there was no turning back.

Belly and Steven got out of the car first, just like every year prior. Footsteps echoed from the crushed up shells and rocks that were considered a driveway. Laughter and chatter, I recognized the voice as Jeremiah’s. My mother shifted underneath my head in hearing this, ready to get up. Her eyes met mine, silently pleading for me to just, try.

Sitting up, my back aches from the odd position I forced myself in. What I thought was comfort was a hidden pain shooting through my back. All I wanted more than anything was to lay back down on my moms lap. To pretend we were still at home. Like I wouldn’t have to confront anything. I heard the excitement in Jeremiahs voice.

“So, where’s Y/n?” My moms heavy sigh was a signal of impatience, her understanding was wearing thin, she was ready to shove me out into the outside.

I opened the car door slowly, head peaking out. My eyes were wide and nervous. Hands shaking around the door frame. I felt like a shell of the person I was the last time I’d stepped foot on this very ground.

“Jere.” His eyes were just as bright blue as I remembered, his hair just as unruly and free. He hadn’t changed, that alone gave me some sort of comfort. I felt my lips twitch up into a smile, eyebrows furrowed. I should’ve had smile lines at this age, but I only had worry lines. To stressed to think about being happy. But here I was, body peaking beyond the car door, cowering like a young child meeting new faces at a party.

My feet dragged, my body curling into itself in such a pathetic way. The door close weakly behind me, it didn’t make a sound I was sure I hadn’t closed it properly in my nervousness.

His footsteps were quick on the driveway, long strides shortening the amount of time it took to reach me. His eyes were slightly closed, like he was holding back tears. His arms outstretched, fingers motioning for me to come to him.

I didn’t realize how much I had missed how tightly he held onto me until having been deprived of it for so long. I wished I had been around more. I think I would’ve been better off if I had been. I could’ve healed, talked everything through.

But I ran. Far away from the people who supported me greatly, from the people who I needed to be around the most. I was cowardly and childish. A fool so blinded by her own emotions, I let myself close off to the people who I’d never had to before. I smeared my tears on Jeremiah’s shirt, his shoulder firm under my cheeks.

“I didn’t think you’d actually come.” His hands held my cheeks when he pulled away, keeping a hold on me liked I’d slip away if he didn’t. I shook my head, eyes crinkling just like they used to when we were children. I let out a hurt laugh. It was the furthest thing from real, but it felt nice to make someone else believe it was. Placing my hands over his, he lost all ability to move his hands other than his thumbs. He swiped at my tears, fighting off his own.

“I missed you.” I pinched his cheek, wiggling his face around playfully and snapping it back into place. His hands fell from my face, pretending to not find amusement in my attempts of play in such a serious moment. He swatted my hands away. My hangover was still intense, and my heart still beat unevenly, there was still a sense of magic around the beach house. I could feel the sadness slipping away, a new relief filling my heart as I eased back into the old routines of summer. It was still there, it always would be, but being around half of the pair I grew up around was enough to clear the murky skies and paint them a beautiful shade of crystal blue.

“I didn’t think you’d ever come back.” His words made my hands freeze, pulling back away from him and my smile falling, hard to bring back up. How could I explain my absence was one that was caused not only by the passing of his own mother, but by the cruel joke his brother had played on me. How in the weakest times, he continued to play me, made me feel so easy.

A deep breath got stuck in my throat, blinking hard. The small lump in my throat expanded until it burned. I swallowed, and swallowed until the pain was soothed enough to speak without an intense rasp. Licking my lips, I prepared for the long explanation and heavy details I would shorten to help Jeremiah understand why I had left everyone behind. I opened my mouth, only to have my words cut off and my heart to leap into my throat.

“Y/n.” His voice was airy, like a weight had been lifted off of his shoulders. Turning my head to the side, I saw the joy in his face, mixing with what I could read as pure shock and what I could pick up as a deep sadness. It was clear it wasn’t only the youngest who was shocked by me showing up this summer.

“Conrad.” My tone was the same. I didn’t chase after him like I did to Jeremiah, nor did I welcome him into my arms, letting him walk right up to me. I felt stuck in place, heart racing at the sudden confrontation. He looked thinner, more tired. But his skin was still sun kissed and his nose was burnt on the bridge into a pinkish red. He had freckles scattered on his face and the same middle part that still, even after almost a decade of the change, curved off to the side near the back.

It was his house, it was stupid to pretend to be shocked by him being there. Jeremiah and all the courage I’d gained to even begin the process of speaking up about what happened was gone. The smile, even as fake as it was was wiped from my face and replaced with pure terror, pain.

It was like ripping my heart out all over again. Resurrecting the feelings that I had sworn to have buried over the last years. The ones I promised would never come back. I never saw myself in this light. So pathetic, letting something so old kill me all over again. It was like I was watching myself out of my body, listening to the world around me as a ghost. Only half of who I was. It was like I convinced myself these past few months that what happened was merely just a flesh wound, nothing deeper. I couldn’t have anticipated how far the ache would reach. How intense it would feel.

Conrad had began to try and speak again, his hands raising, my heart beating. The closer he inched, the harder it became to breath. The more blurry my vision became, the more everything hurt in a way I was sure I would never feel again.

Like some saint, Jeremiah had seen it. The way my shoulders tensed, chest rising and falling erratically. My skin was becoming blotchy around my neck and my eyes were watering more. I looked just as panicked as I felt. He’d seen me crashing out, he knew just as Conrad once had to get me out of there.

His hand hooked in mine, fingers intertwined tightly and palms pressed together until there was no space between us. He looked to me with a fake face on, eyes searching mine, he prayed I would go along with it.

My ears tuned most of it out, the pounding on my ears to great to really listen to what he was saying. I could only nod my head and let him lead the way. My footing was unstable, the ground shifting and pebbles flying in front of my feet each time I lifted my shoes off the ground. The birds sung to each other, and my mother instructed everyone to help unload the last of the cars luggage. Jeremiah and I had slipped away, keeping distance away from Conrad while doing so and slipped through the back door to seek shelter in his room.

I knew I had to explain it to him then, I couldn’t leave Jeremiah in the dark. Not when he’d been so worried that he pulled me away from his own brother, my best friend. He’d saved me, in a way. I owed it to him to tell him everything. Even if he’d take Conrad side. Even if I lost my only other bridge to Susannah’s life. He deserved to know.

Sitting on his messy duvet cover, my shoes fell to the floor, creating a heavy sound when they connected with the carpet. My knees were pulled to my chest, as if to hide away in a way. He was patient with me, his hand warm on my leg. I felt calmer without Conrad so close, with walls to separate us. I told him everything. He stayed stone faced while processing my feelings, how my heartache had been so great I couldn’t take myself back here until now. How my heart still longed for Conrad Fisher, how it always would. He didn’t judge me, but I could see how he felt bad for me. An idiot who fell in love with his idiot brother.

She’d been ignoring me all week. Something I never saw myself becoming well aquatinted with when it came to her. She was always a ball of sunshine, so easy going, so open to change. I had no idea that by me expressing my feelings I could change it in a moment. I wouldn’t have done it if I knew she would have run like this.

My mom always believed that Y/n and I were meant to be, pulled together by some invisible force. It constantly worked in our favors to push and pull us into a tightly knitted circle. Just us. When she died, Y/n was persistent on being supportive. Being there, caring more than anyone had ever done for me in that dark time. I thought that it was smart to buy into my fantasies, that Y/n had developed the same feelings I held for her and we could finally be what I’d always dreamed of.

It was the worst thing I could’ve done, looking back. How naive I was to think that even if she did reciprocate what I held for her, she was grieving just like I was. She was weak. Maybe she thought of it as wrong, now that my mom was dead. I drove her away with my own selfishness. It was a regret I carried all of my college experience.

Phone dry, a never ending loop of unanswered texts. She became a dump in a way, a place for me to open up even in her not being there. Part of me liked to think she read the messages. She had turned off her alerts, I had no idea, but thinking she saw them made my heart hurt less.

I thought by her coming, even though I knew the chances were slim as the Conklin’s had packed up and spent the summer down at Cousins without her in the previous years, I knew that maybe by her just being close that we could mend things. I had to. It hurt me to not be able to reach out and touch her like I once had the privilege to.

To hold her fingers under mine, rubbing dirt out of her eyebrows and maybe pressing my palms to her temples just to feel her warmth. How her legs tangled between the lawn and my own. It was all a foreign memory, ones that kept me going. Her laugh was a distant memory, one that echoed each night before I went to bed. For years I covered my ears and held my breath, afraid to loose the sound of her voice and smell of her perfume. Some shirts stayed hung up idly in my closet because she lingered on them. I didn’t want to wash it away yet.

Jeremiah insisted she just needed time after the first day. After he’d taken her away from me. I went into his room that night to yell at him, ask him why he would do that to me when he knew just how badly I wanted to hold her. He shook his head and held his breath. She was still hurting, he explained. Still scarred by the injuries that should’ve healed months ago. She needed time.

Time, something that became limited in the summer. Something we had not much of. There was no more guarantee she would be back. No more sure telling that her smile would once again light up the summer home and her voice would ring throughout the beaches. This could be my last ever moments with her. My last real conversation being one that caused her to leave.

I wanted to make it right more than anything, wanted to show her I still cared more than anything. I wanted to tell her everything. Pretend that we were okay, really be okay. I wanted her back.

Around the twelve day mark, I had enough. Time and space was something she had plenty of. I understood her, better than anyone. I know she needed her space, continues to need to heal. But for the first time in my life it’s like I have no clue on how to even begin to help her do that. It made me feel stupid, helpless. Killing myself over a girl who was once only a little girl to me.

The old dock was a place I found myself at most peace. The way the waves gently brushed against the old wooden beams, rocking the platform above. How the moonlight peaked through the cracks of the wooden roof and glistened on the water. You could faintly make out the shape of fish if you really looked and the wind was chilling compared to the usual humid summer air that hung all morning.

My arms were situated right against my body, hands tucked under my armpits. I was cold, sure, but I would never admit it. I always loved when Conrad would take me out here when we were younger. He learned his own love for the spot form his mother, a love that was passed down from child to child like an everlasting passion.

It was quiet, the water and the air drowning out any background noise. Sometimes if you were lucky, young children would play in the background. Laughter would fill the area. Maybe an old couple would barbecue outside. You could people watch. It was all so serene. Not enough to block out the creaks of approaching footsteps. How the boards groaned under the heavy steps getting closer.

My nose was red, I scrunched it in the cold. I sighed heavily, releasing any tension.

“This has always kind of been our spot, huh.” His voice was much deeper than I recalled it. Much more gravely, raspy than before. He was referring to Susannah and how it started, the first discussions that made us realize we were closer than all the others. We were certainly best friends. It was funny how even though it was her funeral that ultimately led to our breakage that she was a reoccurring theme in our lives. I nodded.

Silence took over us, a gap left between our bodies. I felt the urge to stay in place fighting the one to leave. I swallowed hard, looking over my shoulder and backing away slowly. My feet found the floor behind me, and unlike I had when the incident occurred, I was steady and able to begin my escape.

“Y/n, wait.” Conrad spoke softly. His voice wasn’t demanding, almost like he was begging. His eyes begged more than his voice. He pleaded for me to stay. I turned my head to him, stopping short and turning to face him. I watched as his frame began to tower over mine the closer and closer we got. He left a sizable gap between us still, out of respect for me.

Looking up at him, my eyes reflected the stars, wide and expecting. I waited patiently while his tongue licked around his mouth, his breathing heavier and heavier by the minute. He looked like he might burst.

“Y/n, you’re my best friend.” The words stung to hear even now. Even when I should’ve been relieved to know that he still considered me to be at the top of his list. My own heartache held me back. I could only nod.

“I know.” I could feel the lump in my throat form. How it hurt to not cry. How my eyebrows felt heavy and my nose became sore, not from the cold anymore.

He breathed out harshly, watching as I tried to make my escape again. His hand was harsh on my hand, pulling me back to where I was. I hadn’t even gotten the chance to turn away yet but he knew my intentions just as well as I did.

“You’re my best friend and it kills me to not be able to have you in my life anymore. I miss what we had, what we were. Everything was going great and then…what happened to us, Y/n?” I wish I could’ve answered him, but we both knew what led us here.

“I don’t have to defend my feelings to you.” My lip quivered, feeling a fight rising between us. We never used to fight. Now looking back on it, our last two interactions had only been fights. How quickly things can change.

Ripping my hand from his grasp I turned and made my quick escape down the dock. Walking as quick as my feet would carry me until my feet felt the grass beneath the soles of my shoes. I heard Conrad’s own steps connecting with the flooring just as harshly as mine had. The yank on my wrist was no as gentle as the first time around. His grip was harsh, tight. He made sure there was no escape.

“What is wrong with you?” His voice was raised but he wasn’t shouting. He rarely shouted at me. He always said he loved me too much to be mad at me.

“What’s wrong with me? What’s wrong with me?” My eyes rolled and my chest heaved, I felt myself getting hotter, cheeks redder.

“Susannah’s dead. She fucking died and everyone was hurting. You were hurting, I was hurting! You treated me like a last resort! Like, now that you lost someone important to you—you needed someone to fill the void! Made me feel easy, like an idiot! Trying to kiss me like it didn’t change anything—like it didn’t mean anything! It ruined everything Conrad! You decided that because you couldn’t have your ego bruised by being openly emotional, you just had to keep pushing people away! You used me! ” I threw my free hand up. I was crying. I felt stupid for crying, I shouldn’t be crying over him.

“I didn’t do that! No, Y/n you were never a last resort. I thought…I thought it would help! I didn’t think it would hurt you that badly. God, why did it have to hurt us so badly?” He shouted it at the sky. A fog now hugging the trees in the distance. A rainstorm coming in by morning. Clear sky’s would soon turn dark and murky. It felt fitting.

I felt rage. Pure rage. How blind he was to why I was hurting. I had pointed him in every direction, given him hints and yet he was always the one who even with their smart eyes and quick attention, could never truly figure out what I held for him. It all bubbles out like a sickness. A burning vomit that was nothing more than a dry heave. It hurt to get out, but the relief afterwards was worth it

“Because I love you, you idiot!” My voice was loud, deafening in the heavy silence that now hung between us, “I love you, okay?” I was more quiet the second time, seeing Conrad’s big eyes and shocked expression. How his hand loosened on my wrist, I prepared for the worst. The long awaited rejection that would forever break me, tear away the last pieces of the Fisher brothers from my life all together. Our past only to be held in old Polaroids and my moms photo book.

“And I’ve known it since that day in the pier. You bought me ice cream and I realized nobodies ever cared for me like that before. It felt so good to be know so well. It felt ducking amazing to have someone like that. I cared so much about you, I’m afraid I always will. Even now I can’t shake it.” I went on and on, confessing how I felt, when I realized what always been there. I felt his touch leave me completely. It felt cold to be so alone. My tears were salty when they landed on my lips, I wonder if Conrad could taste them.

His hands were warm on my cheeks, palms pressing into my jawline so hard that the simple touch felt that much more intense. His eyes were shut, I noticed. So I closed mine too, allowing myself to give into the boy in front of me. His chest pressed against mine, we were so close, air was almost impossible to find. I could only breathe in him, everything was Conrad. I could feel him everywhere. My nose, my eyes, my ears, my fingertips. His lips molded against my perfectly, slotting themselves into place and setting off jolts of electricity in my veins. It was slow and passionate, everything I had ever dreamed it to be. Wished for. He was gentle and rough, fearful to hurt me, as if I would shatter under his touch, but the pure desire to show me he felt the same was too great to dull down his actions.

We separated with a gasp. Heaving at the lack of air, both breathless form how long it lasted and how much build up had led us here. How badly we desired it. His forehead rested against mine softly, hands sliding down to settle on my waist. He was a lot softer now, more gentle, kinder. Like now that everything had been said wordlessly, he could finally relax by having me in his hold.

Our eyelashes fluttered against the others cheeks, a soft laughter passing between us. Our smiles were b, it felt more like a scar than a scab now. To have some reassurance that he didn’t go after me because I was easy in his eyes. But because he felt the same.

“It was the day at the beach. We got sunburnt badly and you took care of me all night.” I kissed his cheek while he spoke, holding onto him just a moment longer, “You said you realized your feelings the day at the boardwalk. I found mine while you were rubbing aloe on my back.” We laughter again at the almost stupid memory. How we had both realized what we felt at rehab seemed like the most insignificant parts of our relationship. Not when Conrad had taken me to my first party and danced with me all night, not when I stayed up all night with him and held him close just for the hell of it, but when we were children.

We had been so blind to it our whole lives it was almost a tragedy. How much wasted time we had in our lives. It was something we would never get back. Something so precious, something we all had so little of. It was too late to rewrite our history. We could only hope to fix what was broke. And in the silent of the night, Conrad began the mending with the soft whisper of three simple words. Ones that came out in almost a mumble, they only reached my ears.

“I love you.” I never truly believed Conrad when he would joke how distance makes the heart grow fonder, but after what felt like a lifetime apart, it felt like the most honest statement to be made.

Conrad Fisher was mine and I was his. After all of our damaged fights and flaws, we’d found each other again. Being pulled together again by that invisible string. Sticking like glue. My heart swelled knowing he would be mine in the morning.

I will forever cling onto everything I feared, but I will feel at peace with my own inquiries while now that we are half-awake, intimate in how we hold each other. Finally, the grief subsided and I am at peace. I am myself again, he is himself with me.

I know myself better than I have in years.

[mazzystar24]

I totally get I just finished my exam week (I had to do a math test at 8am Sat😭). Wish you luck tho!

Also do you have any good buddies fics? Destiel too?

Math test at 8am is BRUTAL

Thank you I will definitely need it😭😭

Unfortunately I only have buddie fics to offer😔:

(Warning I do like a fair amount of angst)

Right where you left me - by hyacinthusbloom ( @thebloomingheather on here) - when I say I might be as big a fan of this fic as I am of the show I MEAN IT, you do not even understand how much I love this fic or how obsessed I am with it, I have reread it so many times despite it still being in progress that I think I may genuinely qualify it as addictive, me and @estheticpotaeto legit wait for updates like a dog at the author’s door istg, like everything about this fic is flawless and written with so much love and emotion and the way the writer captures the effects of trauma is just amazing because it’s so rare to find this level of diving into ptsd and the more uncomfortable aspects of it that are more taboo or less understandable to people, like I can yap for an hour about this fic but I’ll just say READ IT

Any fic by daisies_and_briars ( @cal-daisies-and-briars on here) but one of my favourites of his is Both blade and branch and muscle memory and four can keep a secret and appetency and the two she’s writing right now (change the prophecy and steal my sunshine) -wow at that point I should’ve left it as any fic because that’s a lot of favourites😭😭

Any fic by @loserdiaz plus with them you get enough lighthearted fics to even out the angst

Ooo I’m not sure what their username on here is but lizzybizzyzz is also another writer who I just love their fics

Fractals by hobbitprincess - one of those fics that make you squeak at how much love these fictional characters have for each other

Beneath my mother tongue by archerincombat - the angst the writing the way they hit every single emotional beat? Amazing

Anything by this_is_moony_lovegood

Leave the light on (I’ll be coming home) by HMSLusitania - the presumed dead Eddie fic of your dreams, a constant reread for me it’s just 👌

Anchored by adorkable_buddie - sorry Chris you gotta be injured sometimes just for us to get our buddie dreams hope you understand and we appreciate your sacrifice 😔🫶

empty, broken, lonely, hoping by daniweb - when I tell you I love the presumed dead trope you best believe I’m telling the truth because the ANGST?? Yes please, LISTEN it’s the closest you can get to the emotional beats of killing off a character without ever killing them off because you love them and happy endings too much so TIM MINEAR TAKE NOTES I KNOW YOU SAID YOU LOVE THEM TOO MUCH TO KILL THEM, anyways back to to the point this fic again is just flawless execution by the writer like absolutely love it

every time we stop talking (the universe starts screaming) by withmeornotatall - emotional destruction and I absolutely love it, divorce era 2.0 and it HITS

Home is where it hurts- by rileyblue2001 - can you tell I hate the Buckley parents because I HATE the Buckley parents

The one with the return of the sex addiction by buddiefication (pumpkincreamcoldbrew) - I’ve reccomended so much angst so have a funny little light hearted buddie fic with the father bobby vibes we all love❤️❤️

Okay back to the angst tho 😭😭- out of ashes by Ashavahishta - AHHHHHHH THIS FIC JUST AHHHHH STOP THE WAY I WOULD DIE FOR A FOLLOW UP FIC TO THIS AHHHH I LOVE IT SM AND ITS LEGIT A ONE SHOT I CRIED SO HARD

Falling Slowly; Sing Your Melody (I’ll Sing It Loud) by Princessfbi ( @princessfbi on here who I also love sm of their fics so highly suggest just going on their page and looking through all the fics) - absolutely love it, legit gave me brain rot and got me obsessed for a GOOD while

I'm comin' back, don't let me go by wikiangela ( @wikiangela on here also love love their fics again so check them out but this one is probably my favourite of theirs)

Okay this is looking more and more like a uni reading list so I’m gonna shut up now but I hope you enjoy these fics and that a few of them emotionally damage you like they did me because I love to spread the joy (see: pain and suffering) 🫶🫶

[milaisreading]

Random scenarios between the manager and Blue Lock (pt II)

Warnings ⚠️: none in particular. Reader uses she/her. Requests are open

Characters: Rin, Yukimiya, Aryu, Karasu, Otoya, Niko, Hiori and Kurona

⚽️Blue Lock belongs to:Muneyuki Kaneshiro and Yusuke Nomura⚽️

Part I

Rin:

"What are you writing?" Rin asked out of curiosity as he sat down at (Y/n)'s table to eat.

"Just some stuff Ego-san ordered. Can you believe the U-20 match is next week? I am so excited to see you all play!" Rin looked at the girl passively, since he was more worried over different things concerning the game. For example his brother. Itoshi Sae is a well known name in Japan, and the older Itoshi was admired by both boys and girls. That was the part that worried Rin more than the actual game. What if (Y/n) saw his big brother play and decided to leave Blue Lock? What if she picked Sae over him? Sae took so many things and people away from him in the past, he couldn't let that happen again!

"Rin! Your food is getting cold!" The boy jumped at that and looked down at his food in confusion.

"Oh..."

"Anyways, as I was saying I am excited to see you all play. The U-20 will be no match against you guys!" (Y/n) said in confidence, knowing her friends are unstoppable. Rin gulped and waited for a moment before finally speaking up.

"Not even Itoshi Sae?"

"Not even him. You guys will show him what Japan is about."

Rin's eyes widened for a second and he slowly nodded his head.

'I think I am safe... (Y/n) is only here for me, not big brother. That's how it all should be.

Yukimiya:

It was one of the rare weeks where the Blue Lock team was allowed to go home and spend some time with their families and friends. (Y/n) did her usual routine when she was home: sleep, eat, go out and watch movies with her father at night. Today she was doing it a little differently, since Yukimiya called her the previous day saying he would be in Shibuya today, so they agreed to meet up.

"It's quite cold today. The one time I go out, this is the weather." Yukimiya sighed as (Y/n) laughed a little as she fixed up her scarf.

"Ahh~ it's nice though! It is November after all, so the coldness is really welcoming." The girl commented as she looked up at the sky.

"S-so... where should we go?" Yukimiya wondered, looking nervously at the ground, realizing again that he was alone with (Y/n) today. No Ego or Anri to call her for help, no Blue Lock player asking for the most random things of the girl or pulling her away from her job, it was just them.

'This feels like a date... well from the outside we do look like a couple.' Yukimiya sighed sadly as he adjusted his glasses.

'Wish it was true.'

"What do you say?" (Y/n) suddenly asked and the boy woke up from his thoughts, looking apologetically at her.

"Sorry, I was thinking about something. What were you saying?"

"It's alright. I just want to know if you want us to go to a arcade nearby. They have a food court too." (Y/n) explained and Yukimiya nodded his head with a sheepish smile.

"Sure, that sounds great. I am very good at that basketball game that's always in arcades, you know?" Yukimiya said proudly.

"Really? Maybe you will win the grand prize today. I like more the video games there."

The two continued talking about the various arcade games they could play.

'Maybe we aren't now a couple... but maybe by the next time we visit this place.' Yukimiya thought as his face turned a bright pink.

Aryu:

(Y/n) pouted as she watched the Blue Lock players having a practice match against each other, and while she was usually always excited to see her friends play, she couldn't help but look at one person in envy and awe.

'His hair is so pretty, it looks so soft too! I want that hair... but I also wonder what it is like to touch...'

(Y/n) kept on subtly staring at Aryu, who was pretty much unaware at the looks the girl kept on sending him.

'New mission! Ask Aryu to braid his hair!' (Y/n) nodded to herself and went back to her duty.

Later that day, the girl was sitting with Karasu and Baro eating her dinner.

"Aren't you going to eat that? Your soup is getting cold." Baro wondered, pointing at (Y/n)'s meal. The girl looked away from Aryu's form and nodded at him.

"S-sure!"

"You have been acting weird all day. Are you alright?" Karasu asked,earning a curious look from Baro.

"You are getting enough sleep? Hope you aren't tiring yourself out."

"Yeah, also you should eat more. My food has a lot of protein!" Karasu said as (Y/n) tried to protest his offer, but Baro already did that for her.

"Mine is better, move."

"No, you do."

'Not now- Aryu is leaving!' (Y/n) turned her attention from the two and at the brown haired boy. Taking a deep breath, (Y/n) got up from her seat and ran after Aryu, the other two not noticing the girl was even gone.

"Aryu! Wait!"

Surprised by (Y/n)'s yell, the boy stopped and looked back, worried that something had happened to her.

"Is everything alright? Do you need help with something?" Aryu wondered.

(Y/n) stopped in front of him and took a deep breath.

"I... I actually wanted to ask you something..." The girl started with a red face, keeping an eye on his hair. Now Aryu was the nervous one, since this scene reminded him a lot of the ones in romcom movies.

'Is she going to confess her love to me? Breath Aryu, you can't mess this up! Just say calmly that you like her back-'

"Can I braid your hair? Please!"

"Huh? My hair?" Aryu raised his eyebrow, a little disappointed that it wasn't a confession.

"I know it sounds weird. But it looks so pretty and soft, I really want to braid it. Sorry, it's stupid."

Aryu chuckled at her rambling and patted her head.

'She is so adorable!'

"Sure. My haircomb is in my room. Come on." Aryu smiled and pulled (Y/n) along.

'It went better than expected!' The girl thought.

'So my hair is her weakness? Good to know! Now I know what to use when I want her attention. Braiding hair is such a couples activity.'

Karasu:

'Who in their right mind is already training?! It's not even time for them to be up!' (Y/n) thought as she walked to the main training room. It was 7 am right now and the boys would usually be woken up at 8, so seeing someone inside right now worried the girl.

(Y/n) slowly nodded the door and looked around the place, nothing was made a mess, everything was just like she had left the night before. The only thing that was different is that on the field were a few footballs and Karasu was kicking them over and over again.

"Karasu! What are you doing here so early? You should really be resting and not overworking yourself."

The boy sat down on the ground and sighed, clearly annoyed with something. The girl raised her eyebrow and sat down across from him. She decided to keep quiet for a while, wondering how to start the conversation.

"Soo... is there a reason you are up so early?"

"I am training."

"And why? You still have an hour more of sleep." (Y/n) said again and Karasu sighed.

"I guess I just want to keep up with everyone. Everyone on the team is so extraordinary and over the top with their skills."

"So are you? I mean, you wouldn't be here if you weren't."

Karasu kept quiet for a moment and then spoke up again, clearly frustrated.

"No... at least I don't think so, I can just feel it."

"Do you feel that all the time? Or just at times?" (Y/n) raised her eyebrow as Karasu stopped to think that over.

"I think... I don't know I just feel it at times."

The blue-eyed boy admitted, a little embarrassed.

"We all have those days where we feel down and not food enough. Karasu, you are more than enough for Blue Lock and for Japanese football. You are doing a great job already, don't overwork yourself for some fleeting feelings."

Karasu kept quiet for a moment as he stared at (Y/n), feeling his heart beat a little faster as her words played through his head.

'I am more than enough? Am I...'

"Am I more than enough for you?" Karasu asked, almost instantly regretting the words as he realized how weird it sounded. (Y/n), thinking he meant it in a football related way quickly nodded her head.

"Of course! You are doing great. I am sure soon clubs around the world will be fighting for you to play for them." The girl said with a grin. Karasu sighed in relief,feeling some form of relief wash over him.

'God I love her!'

Otoya:

"So many people..." (Y/n) muttered as she peeked from the entrance into the conference room. It was merely a few hours before the great match between Blue Lock 11 and U-20 Japan, and Anri had ordered her to take some notes while her and Ego were questioned. The teams were in their locker rooms, so (Y/n) really didn't have much to do anyways... well everyone except for one person was in the locker room.

"What are you looking at?"

Jumping up, (Y/n) looked up to find Otoya standing above her.

"Me? I have to take some notes for Teieri-san and Ego-san for late- Why are you not with the others?!" (Y/n) whisper-yelled at the boy, who just shrugged his shoulders.

"I didn't feel like staying in there when you are all here alone... around the U-20 group of all people." Otoya said, rolling his eyes at the thought of them.

'Not even we are that obnoxious...'

"So? They are here to play, nor make idly conversations with random girls." (Y/n) argued back, already more composed. Otoya sighed at her words and pinched her cheeks.

"Ow!"

"So cute and naive, (Y/n). You have no idea how these guys work."

"And you do?" (Y/n) flinched as her cheeks were finally free from his hold.

"Yes I do."

"How?"

"I just do." Otoya said back. Although he did sound smug at the moment, internally he was panicking that (Y/n) might possibly catch interest in one of their rivals. He wouldn't really blame her for that.

'These are all professional players and meanwhile I am... I am just me I guess...'

"You really don't need to worry. I will keep my eyes on you guys anyways." (Y/n) suddenly spoke up, leaning against the wall.

Otoya kept quiet, looking nervously around the hall as (Y/n) continued.

"Besides, who would look at them when we have literal monsters in Blue Lock. So don't put yourself down or worry about me. I can handle it." The girl patted his arm as Otoya let out a nervous sound of agreement.

'I hate that I can barely speak to her properly... but at least I know she won't abandon me... us for the U-20 or anyone.' Otoya thought, eventually smiling and leaving for the locker room.

'She looks really cute in our official uniform. Wonder how cute she will look like with my jersey.'

Niko:

"You should have stayed and rested for the day. I can handle myself." Niko coughed out as (Y/n) shook her head, pushing the boy down onto the bed so that she should sleep again.

"Don't be rediculous, I am not leaving you with a fever all alone here. The medics are always fine when I stay behind and help. So there is no need for you to worry. Just lay down, I will bring you tour medicine." (Y/n) said calmly and went to the cupboards, looking through them as Niko stared at her the whole time. He sighed dreamily as he watched (Y/n) move from spot to spot, worry evident on her face until after she finally opened a different cupboard  and she visibly relaxed.

'Probably had a hard time finding the medicine. She worries too much, but... that's her charm I guess. That's why Ego-san probably hired her.' Niko thought as his face got redder and he smiled to himself.

'She always gives her all into helping us and barely ever asks for anything in return, just for us to stay safe on the field while we play.'

"Here you go! Finally found the medicine!"

Niko watched in slight amusement as (Y/n) cheered and handed him the capsules and a glass of water.

"Thank you.." Niko said as he sat up and took the thing from her hands.

"Alright, you stay here and rest. I need to go and tell the cooks to make something for your fever. Maybe a nice chicken soup or udon noodles., what do yoh prefer?" (Y/n) mused to herself as Niko shook his head.

"You don't need to think so much about it. Whatever you pick is fine."

"Huh? Don't be stupid, you are sick so you tell me what you want." (Y/n) said leaning down to whisper something to Niko.

"Don't tell anyone, but I barely ever follow the list Teieri-san gave me when you guys are sick. So spoil yourselves with some food you like while you can."

'So close! Did she always smell so nice?!' The black-haired boy held back squeal as he silently said 'udon' and (Y/n) nodded her head.

"Alright! I will be back in a bit. Don't do anything stupid and stay in the room~" (Y/n) called out, already bolting out of the room to get him his dinner.

Niko watched her disappear in a haze and he laid his head on the pillow again.

'She is so cute when she smiles!'

Hiori:

'So cute~' (Y/n) thought as she finished reading a book Anri had bought her. It was a romance book where the boyfriend made a grand surprise for his girlfriend after they were separated for months. He organized a whole dinner date and got a pretty bouquet before he proposed, (Y/n) quietly cheered as the girl said yes.

'This was so adorable... wish there was someone who would do this for me.' (Y/n) sighed as she put the book away, playing with a lose strand of hair as Hiori approached her.

"Are you alright? You seemed quite happy a few minutes ago..." The blue-haired boy asked, sitting down next to (Y/n).

"Hmm? Yeah, I just read this book where a guy made a grand surprise for his girlfriend when she returned home after months. It was so adorable."

"Sounds sweet... but why are you sad about it? It sounds considerate of him." Hiori wondered, trying to pick the right words.

"Ah... I guess I just wish something like this will happen to me one day." (Y/n) admitted, which did get Hiori's full attention now.

"You want someonw to propose?"

"Huh? No, not that part... well not now. The The bouquet part would be nice... I know it kind of sounds stupid." (Y/n) admitted. Hiori kept quiet as he thought over her words. He didn't have a lot of time to question you as Karasu and Kurona ran up to where they were and pulled (Y/n) away to help with something.

'Let's see...' Hiori thought, quickly taking the book and tried to find that specific part.

'The proposing part I will do in a few years. For now the bouquet will do, maybe I can ask Teieri-san to help me out.'

A few days had passed since that incident happened and (Y/n) basically forgot about the conversation she had with Hiori. The boy didn't though, and after a awkward time of asking Anri for help, the boy finally got a bouquet of (f/f).

'Just calmly approach her...' Hiori thought, gulping nervously as he walked to his room, knowing (Y/n) was probably there.

'Teieri-san did say Aryu asked her to braid his hair.'

The blue-eyed boy slowly opened the door, where sure enough (Y/n) was, along with Aryu, Bachira, Chigiri and Isagi. Nagi was there too, but he was asleep as it seemed.

"Hiori! You are back sooner than usually!" The boy cursed at how loud Bachira can be, now feeling embarrassed as all eyes were on him.

"What do you have there? Flowers?" Chigiri raised his eyebrow as the boy walked up to them with the flowers.

"Ah! It's (f/f) too! Did a fan send them?" (Y/n) asked excitedly, abandoning Aryu's hair to look at the flowers, to which the boy pouted.

"No... I actually asked Teieri-san to get them for you. You did say you wanted a bouquet the other day soo..." Hiori trailed off as he felt both embarrassed and intimidate by the stares he was getting.

"I... Thank you so much, Hiori! They are beautiful!" (Y/n) exclaimed as Hiori handed them to her.

"Thanks, I will put them in vase!" The girl said as she ran out of the room. The boy had a content smile on his face, ignoring the daggers and poking he was receiving from the five other boys, and yes the commotion caused Nagi to wake up.

'Ahh~ her smile is so adorable!'

Kurona:

One thing (Y/n) didn't enjoy after moving to Germany for the internship at Bastard München was the ever-changing weather Munich had to offer. She was looking outside her window as the rain kept falling down for the past 3 hours, and it wasn't showing signs of stopping either! Pouting she looked down on the streets again, seeing a few people walk by and that was about it.

'This is boring.'

As if on cue, there was a knock on her dorm room and a familiar voice came from the other side.

"(Y/n), are you free to hang out. I was bored in my room."

"Sure! The door is unlocked, Kurona!" The girl smiled, finally she wouldn't have to suffer in this weather alone. The redhead walked inside and looked just as depressed as she was.

"The weather sucks, man it was sunshine just yesterday." The boy pouted and sat on the couch as (Y/n) joined him.

"I know! And today on our day off it has to be so gloomy... well can't change it now. Want to watch something?" (Y/n) wondered as Kurona thought about it for a moment, then nodded his head.

"Sure, I found a channel where they show anime in Japanese."

"Great!"

And that was basically how they spent the rest of the afternoon, watching some random shows and talking about the things that happened during the past few days. The more they talked, the more Kurona was growing insecure though, since he felt like he was doing too much.

'Maybe I am talking too much right now... should I stop? Should I have said that one thing?'

As if sensing his distress, (Y/n) spoke up.

"It's really nice seeing you talk so freely. You should do it more often."

Kurona looked at her in surprise for a moment, then spoke up.

"Really? You don't think it's boring or something?"

"No. I like talking to you, I hope you open up more. Your voice is also soothing."

The last part caused the boy to blush a little and he nodded his head.

"A-alright..."

'It felt nice hearing that... knowing I am not annoying her... I will definitely open up more, if it will make (Y/n) happy.'