#cause I actually don’t remember a lot of the feats like that

[decaffeinatedpartymuggoop]

People talk about how “overpowered” and freaky some of the physical feats in PJO and HOO are but I think people forget that all demigods inherently have enhanced, speed, agility, and strength. So at lot of these physical feats actually make a lot of sense in their “power scaling.”

And I know a lot of people like talk about the Lois Arc jump because that is insane but there are a lot of other feats that show off the enhanced attributes some of the other demigods have.

Like, Hazel ran after a Arion, the fastest horse alive for a WHOLE day. Hours upon hours on end. And even if Arion WASN’T the fastest horse he’s still. A horse. That Hazel was able to keep up with. And then run all the way home.

Reyna EASILY knocks away giant werewolves with a knife and used her javelin like a pole vault. Annabeth managed to fight Kronos, a whole ass Titan, to a standstill. And she’s been shown to perform moves only professional acrobatic and gymnast can do. Piper threw a fifty pound shield at Medea and was described to move fast as a viper.

Jason had dodged arrows that have appeared out of no where, no warning, and Percy has side stepped bullets. BULLETS.

Not to mention that with the Lycaon and werewolves they were all out running and keeping up with WOLVES.

So, yeah, demigods have freaky physical feats.

[coralinnii]

❋Keeping your scrunchie for you❋

Who would keep your scrunchie for you, and would even do your hair feat: Ace ⭑ Sebek ⭑ Azul ⭑ Jack genre: fluff, humor note: reader has hair that uses scrunchies, reader has hair for long hair hairstyles, established relationships, no pronouns used,

I know it's been a while but I have been meaning to write. I just have what I'm calling Silver Syndrome where I fall asleep at any given moment and lose track of time ^_^' whoops

This is sorta self-indulgent since I’m also guilty of always forgetting my hair ties at my friend’s place and when I need one, they would come to me with their arm filled with them xD. Since then, we would always have spares on each other in case any of us need them. 

Getting him to keep it

At first he was gonna tease you. What? Do you feel the need to lay claim on him that you want to leave something of yours on him for all to see? You know there’s more than a hair tie you can leave on him- 

Oh, you’re just forgetful and you want to have a spare on him if you need one? You guys are practically attached to the hip so there’s logic to it, to you anyway. 

He's so gonna fight you on it. It’s one thing to ask him to keep spare some small hair ties on him, heck if you let him use them on occasion he wouldn’t mind at all. But it was those poofy, colorful scrunchies that he can’t even hide underneath his jacket sleeve. 

But he loses this fight with you (he always does when it comes to you) and ends up with a cutesy hair tie that contrasts heavily against his black school jacket. He had to fight the embarrassed flush every time he got teased, especially by his upperclassmen like Cater and Floyd. 

Don’t let his loud complaining fool you, though. Despite all the teases, he still keeps your scrunchie out in the open when he could have easily stuffed it in his pocket. He secretly likes fidgeting with it during class, partly since it’s really soft and partly that it reminds him of you. He thinks a lot about how pretty you look when you have your hair up. 

Would he tie your hair?

Yes, but he wasn't great at it. At first, he can do a simple ponytail but that’s all he really knows about hairstyles. I mean, he only ever ties his bangs back so he’s not the most creative in the hair department. 

Have some patience with him as he sometimes messes up and gets your hair tangled. He’s a fast learner so he’ll get the hang of it. 

Once he’s used to it, he’ll start experimenting with your hair by giving you goofy hairdos like a unicorn horn on your head. He once tried to make round cartoon-like “ears” with your hair for giggles. But he always offers to brush your hair back to normal each and every time. 

Actually, Ace likes to mess with your hair a lot more often now because this gives him a chance to brush your hair. He enjoys the intimacy of the activity, like you two are in your own little world with no one to disturb you. He can spend hours just running his fingers through your hair while you chat about anything and everything. 

“Hey, stop moving around so much! Don’t go complaining to me if this new hairdo turns out bad”

Getting him to keep it

Definitely gonna fight you on this. He argued that you should be responsible enough to remember to keep spares on you at all times. It’s your own fault for being so forgetful about your own things. Plus, it goes against his dress code and he can’t bear to ruin Malleus’ reputation just because his loyal knight has a bright puffy scrunchie on his wrist.

You decided it’s fine if he can’t do it but it did bum you out a bit. Imagining the serious Sebek with your bright scrunchie on his wrist would be the cutest thing to see but you didn’t want to push it if it caused this much arguing. 

But Sebek noticed your declining mood and started to have conflicted thoughts because of it. Would it really make you that happy to see him with that tacky thing on his arm? 

The next day, Sebek came up to you and wordlessly raised his arm towards you. Confused, you asked the green-haired freshman what’s wrong. 

“...I shall allow it” 

“What?”

Apparently, Sebek couldn’t get your sad face out of his head all day yesterday, ruining his mood and causing him to stress out with worry. Lost as to what to do, he did what he tends to do in these situations, and asked Lilia for advice. The older fae chuckled at poor Sebek and assured him that a trivial piece of fabric would hardly ruin Malleus’ image so he is free to decide what he wants to do. 

And Sebek wants to make you happy. 

“Give me your cursed scrunchie, human”

Would he tie your hair?

Again, he’s going to fight you on this. He claims he has better things to do but really he’s just terrible with styling hair and was scared if you didn’t like his work. Unless you want your hair gelled up like his, he doesn’t know what else he can really do with hair in general. 

Still, you encouraged him to try and with you boosting his courage, he started trying simple hairstyles like braids and ponytails. He was a little clumsy but always up to improve himself. He soon became more confident and would even offer to tie your hair up during P.E classes or club activities. 

He especially likes trying out hairstyles that are trendy with his fae kind, like braiding flowers into your hair. The people of Briar Valley are more traditional with their appearance and more extravagant hairstyles are typically reserved for special occasions like parties…or weddings. 

The way Sebek’s cheeks burned when he couldn’t stop thinking how beautiful your hair might look for your wedding…with him as your husband-to-be. Your hair would be absolutely ethereal no matter the style, considering that it’s you-what was he thinking?! 

Best not to bring up his bright face or he’ll start yelling out of sheer embarrassment. 

“...Well, is this to your liking? It is?...I see… What?! I was not worried, don’t be absurd!” 

Getting him to keep it

For the right price, sure. 

I’m joking (kinda) but honestly Azul wouldn’t mind it since it wasn’t that big of a request. I firmly believe that he has more than enough pockets with his dorm uniform. 

Anyone who would even try to tease him about it would just be asking for humiliation as Azul would respond swiftly with some backhanded comments. 

“Embarrassing, you say? Well, I suppose having a lover that relies on me so would seem tiresome to some people. However, I'm afraid I'm just so smitten with my adorable lover who just trust me so. Sighhh, woe is me” 

This octoman would play the “no b*tches?” card. Such poor, unfortunate souls

But one day you needed a hair tie and you asked Azul if he still had your spare. The merman then pulled out a scrunchie you didn't recognize from his pocket

“Azul Ashengrotto…whose scrunchie is this?!” 

Before you start to panic, Azul quickly explained that he came across this scrunchie at a store in the town near the campus. 

“I thought this would look good on you, so I bought it in hopes it suits your taste” 

Even though Azul tried to sound casual, there was a cute flush coloring his cheeks that he was trying to hide behind his gloved hand. He knew you had enough hair ties and you could always buy more yourself. But, he just couldn't stop himself.

That scrunchie was now your new favorite accessory.

Would he tie your hair?

Contrary to the previous boys, Azul has a better sense of style due to his entrepreneurial nature and his dedicated interest to keep up with the most marketable trends. 

I also believe that since Azul is a mommy’s boy, he paid close attention to his mother’s hair styling routine. However, he realizes that it won’t exactly be the same considering you both are not in the ocean and he himself is adjusting to life with dry hair. 

But he won’t be stopped by his inexperience. He would research the best hairstyles for your hair type and what would amplify your natural features. Every chance to do your hair was a chance to improve his skills. Get real comfortable because you’ll be his guinea pig for hours. At least you’ll be a beautiful guinea pig by the end of it. 

At first Azul had some insecurities about keeping you for so long, surely you would be bored being with him for so long and having him practice with your hair, especially when you wouldn't really gain much from it other than a mess on your head most of the time. 

Please reassure him that you love these intimate moments with him and you trust him wholeheartedly with your hair. 

“I’ve heard stories that speak of mermaids that used to lure humans with their beautiful hair. I thought it foolish to be so easily charmed…but seeing yours, I suppose there’s some truth to that.”

Getting him to keep it

Grumbled about it at first but will keep it for you. Any exasperation was mostly just you asking him because of your tendency to forget them than anything else. Despite his grumpy look, Jack wasn’t going to fight you on something as trivial as holding some hair ties for you. Would question you what’s so great about scrunchies, though (they’re adorable, ok?!)

All he asked was that it’s a scrunchie that doesn’t get in the way of his daily routine, and if you could pick one that would be a bit water resistant or dark in color since he’s worried that he would get it dirty during his work-out routine or spelldrive practice at Savanaclaw. 

He honestly doesn’t understand why anyone would make fun of him for holding a scrunchie for you. He's whipped because you trust him with your stuff? This man just can’t relate to loser behavior. 

Even if he's not a fan of scrunchies, he’s still incredibly careful with your hair tie, making sure that it’s either tucked safely under his sleeve or mindful to avoid accidentally snagging the fabric on something. 

If he just recently got the scrunchie from you, he can still smell the scent of your shampoo on it as it starts mixing with his own scent. Don’t tell him but some of his dormmates can see his tail slightly wagging when he glimpses down to his wrist every now and again where your hair tie is.

Would he tie your hair?

He’ll fight more on this. You guys are in an academy, you should be able to tie your own hair. Don’t be lazy, he stated. 

But watch him later try to excuse his actions when he suddenly pulls your hair back with your scrunchie during lunch, just so your hair doesn’t get in your face as you ate. You honestly forgot he still had your scrunchie and Jack was getting frustrated watching your hair constantly falling forward every time you tried to reach your food. 

Since Jack has younger siblings, he has some experience with tying someone’s hair despite having fairly short hair himself. It’s nothing too fancy but he’s pretty good with some basic hairstyles

He’s really gentle with your hair, occasionally pausing to gauge your expression to ensure you’re not in pain. Sometimes you have to be careful or you might just fall asleep with how Jack’s large hands softly handle your hair like it was silk.

“This should keep your hair out of your face. Huh, how do you look? Don’t ask stupid questions…you already know you always look good…No, forget I said anything!”

[bunchesofoats]

Proximity.

Feat — Tyler Galpin x Nevermore!Reader

Contains — Slow Build, Playful Flirting, No Established Relationship, etc ALSO SOME VERY LIGHT WEDNESDAY SPOILERS!! (Set before show in canon)

Length — ~1.8k Words

Notes — Reader’s powers/species not specified (just considered an Outcast). This isn’t proofread, moves a little fast, and was written at like 2 am so proceed with caution I guess. ALSO, I ACTUALLY WORK IN A CAFE SO I WILL INFO DUMP GRRRRBARK BARK WOOF WOOF Also, if you have any input just drop it to my inbox !

“Welcome to the Weathervane staff.”

Your new manager welcomed you with a smile, to which you replied with a nod as she left you to do paperwork. You made your way out of her office, remembering her instructions to be training with Tyler. Your feet shuffling up the stairs slowly, paying no mind to the creaks that came with it. You knew Tyler Galpin, not well, but you knew of him enough to know he was the son of the sheriff. The sheriff who didn’t seem keen on Nevermore students. Though you were pretty sure they only hired you for Outcast Diversity, you were at least happy to had gotten a job that wasn’t Pilgrim’s World.

“Medium Iced Chai Latte with a Chocolate Croissant.” A voice pulled you from your thoughts.

Trailing the voice to the source was easy considering he was the only person behind the counter before you came along. There he was, Tyler Galpin, with the usual mop of brown curls that stopped just above his eyes and the crease of concentration upon his forehead as he moved to fiddle with the espresso machine. You’d been dragged here enough by Enid to know the details, especially considering she kept tabs on everyone.

“You’re looking at the wrong end of the machine, Galpin.” You called out, causing him to jump. A smile crawled its way onto your face at his expression. It didn’t take long for him to register who you were outside of the Nevermore uniform, he had seen you enough and he knew there was a new applicant coming in.

“Do you make a habit of scaring the hell out of people?” He gave you a pointed look.

“More of a hobby,” You shrugged before making your way behind the counter. Taking a closer look at the machine, you had been right. The source of the never ending steam was a valve issue. “I’m gonna need a tri-wing screwdriver and 4 millimeter Allen wrench.”

Tyler handed you the screwdriver with no hesitation, he couldn’t understand the Italian instructions anyway and he wasn’t about to resort to Google Translate.

“You have a valve issue,” You began screwing the bits back into place, careful not to direct any steam towards you or your new coworker.

“You have one of these temperamental beasts with a mind of its own?” He quirked a brow at you, causing you to roll your eyes.

“Not exactly.” Thankfully, Nevermore had quite the class in engineering and you had fairly decent grades. The steam stopped spewing, and the machine was fixed to the best of your ability. Tyler began gathering the pieces of the pipes, filters, and other parts back into place resounding in a satisfying click.

“Thanks…” He stopped for a moment.

“Y/N.”

“No, yes! No, I mean, yes I know! You come in here a lot, and I recognize your name from your application.” He mumbled on and on.

“You’re supposed to be training me and yet you can’t remember my name?” It was your turn to point questions now. It wasn’t like you couldn’t work a register or understand the difference between a cortado or a cafe au lait, but you needed to know your way around Weathervane at least. Plus, it was fun to tease him.

“I just mean, you’re unforgettable.”

What.

“What?”

“You know what, why don’t we start off with a tour? You know the main area, but let me show you the back room.” Tyler abruptly turned away, leaving with tinted cheeks. He lead you to the small storage room on the opposite adjacent end of the bar counter. The length of it was long, but the width of it could just barely fit one person with the shelves so close on either end. He allowed you in first before following in after, showing everything from the closest to the farthest at the back wall.

With Tyler explaining everything in broad detail, it was easy enough to understand considering everything was ordered neatly from the coffee beans and food products being separated from cleaning chemicals. What was hard, on the other hand, was trying not to pay attention to the way the dim lighting reflected in his eyes. Something about it seemed familiar, almost supernaturally captivating. If you didn’t know any better, you’d assume he was a Vampire or Siren or even something else entirely luring you in.

“…And if you have any questions then just ask me.” Tyler finally turned back to you, catching your gaze. He hadn’t realize how close in proximity you were, you awkwardly pressed against the wall as he had just been reaching over to point out which coffee beans were which. You hadn’t been paying attention, not with him so close. You weren’t usually the nervous type, not with Vampires and Telekinetics and Werewolves etc constantly being around you. But this newfound flip of your heart was concerning considering he was 1) a normie you hadn’t actually fully conversed with before and 2) you were still unsure of his standing with you as an Outcast.

“Yeah, I’ll call for your help when I need to fix the espresso machine.” You snort. He huffed with a lingering smile you managed to catch. Maybe his stance wasn’t as bad as his fathers.

“I’m definitely sure you don’t need to call me just for help with that, you can call me for other stuff.” Tyler shrugged.

“So you want me to call you?” Your gaze met his again, forgetting the close distance between you both. This was a different start to your new job than you were expecting. Flirting with your coworker in the back of the cafe was probably against all types of normal work ethic and morals. But when was Jericho ever normal?

“Tyler?” A voice called out from the front, breaking the tension between you two. You both recognized that voice, Tyler knowing it more than you did. You both tried to scramble out of the storage closet in an orderly manner. Tyler emerging first, Sheriff Galpin perking up to see his son from the other side of the counter. You followed suit not a second after, barely halfway out of the closet before you could see Sheriff Gallon’s face drop. Suddenly realizing how incriminating the situation seemed, you quickly grabbed a random can from the shelf within arms reach before fully exiting.

“Hey, uh, dad.” Tyler coughed out, clearing his throat from the situation you two were in. “Just showing the new hire around and restocking.” To which you maneuvered the can to one hand to give the man a small wave.

“Condensed milk? I swear you stocked and dated that one when I came by yesterday.” His dad raised a brow. Shit.

“This one’s long expired, found it on the back shelf with a manufacturing issue puncture in it.” You laughed dryly, moving the can to your side hiding it away. Tyler glanced wide eyed as his father’s expression creased.

“You want your usual?” Tyler moved towards the bar, moving his father’s attention with it. You managed to slip the can back on the shelf before closing the door and following the boy.

“Large Americano. Two shots. Hot.” The sheriff’s gaze never left, studying you closely as you followed Tyler to input the order on the register. You knew how to work a register, but you didn’t want to stay within his dad’s eye sight for long. The setup was as easy as the storage closet, everything labeled from Hot Drinks, Iced Drinks, Specials, and more. Clicking onto the hot drinks, you found everything quickly.

“Did you want to add anything in there like milk or cream?” You asked, knowing already what his answer would be.

“Black.” Like your soul, you thought. The order went through and Tyler thankfully already had it done. Reaching past you on the register to hand it to him, the sheriff gave his son a nod and you an unreadable look before leaving.

“Don’t worry about him,” You heard Tyler assure. “He’s too ‘wrapped up in work’ to care about me being in some closet with someone. Nice save, though.”

You turned to make eye contact with him, his arm resting upon the register counter by your waist and yours almost hitting his chest at the movement. Again finding yourself in close proximity.

“Does that mean you’re often caught doing who knows what in closets with people?” You raised a brow. His face flushed at the question, glancing aside and for once probably happy the cafe was emptier than usual.

“Calm down, lover boy. We’ve skipped a few steps, I still don’t even have your number to call you when I need help.” You flicked his forehead away with a smirk. He let out a small lopsided smile as he fell away from you. You were sure his number would be lying around somewhere on file or you could contact him through the employee app, but where was the fun (and consent) in that? You had no time to think about that as customers had come in.

“Ms. Thornhill, what a surprise to see you!” You couldn’t say you were shocked, Jericho’s a small town and being the only cafe around this would’ve happened eventually. You were surprised you hadn’t seen Enid out and about “blogging” despite it being a weekend.

“Y/N, lovely to see you. Why didn’t you tell me you got a job at the best cafe in town?” She gasped.

“It’s the only cafe in town, Ms. Thornhill.”

“I kid, I kid. Now what should I get? I usually get a double-cap, no foam, with two pumps of sugar free vanilla. But now that you’re my new favorite employee, I’d like your recommendation!” Favorite? Had Tyler been her favorite before? You weren’t sure what she had meant by that.

“You know me, miss, I love a good London Fog.” She knew full well of that too, you bring one into her class every other day.

“Alright, get me one of those!” You rung her up For Here and handed the item receipt to Tyler who was already steaming the milk. The next customer just wanted a warmed up Pain au Chocolat which you got out of the way quick enough.

“Here,” You heard Tyler call to you. Facing him, you noticed him holding a to go cup for you and Ms. Thornhill’s mug on the counter. Had he made two whilst you were busy?

“London Fog with an extra pump of vanilla syrup, that’s how you usually order yours.” He sheepishly scratched the back of his head.

“Now what’s this then?” You grabbed the cup.

“Just think of it as a welcome to Weathervane.” Tyler left with Ms. Thornhill’s order before you could question any further. You note a black smear on your hand, confusion riddled— you turn the cup.

— “(xxx) xxx - xxx

Call me outside of work?

- Tyler”

[nhl-stories]

I'm Back- Jack Hughes feat. Nico Hischier

Summary: Lux stays with Jack in New Jersey, things aren't going as she expected.

Author’s Note: This is sequel of sorts to this previous work you don't need to read it to get this, but it's a good read if I say so myself. This is a bit of a romance story, but mostly it's an ode to platonic soulmates.

Also fudging the timeline of medical school interviews because this is my world and I can do what I want to fit my needs

Word Count: 5.3k

“Hey loser!”

Lux looks up to see Jack sticking his head out of the passenger window like a dog.

“Hey moron,” she shoves his head back into the car and drags her suitcase to the trunk.

Jack is out of the car and lifting it into the trunk before she has a chance.

“What a gentleman.”

Jack’s bright smile never fails to make her grin back, but she isn’t expecting the almost-tender hug that follows.

“Hi Luxy,” he mumbles into her hair, he sounds so tired, she squeezes a little tighter.

A honk jolts them apart.

“Our driver is a little impatient.”

Lux climbs in the back and wraps her arms around the seat and Luke’s shoulders before kissing his cheek.

“Aww look at my little Lukey all grown up.”

He shoves her back towards her seat.

“I could drive before,” he says petulantly before pulling away from the curb.

“Yeah, but now it’s in a car you bought on your own, because you have a job. Let me be proud I don’t have a little brother of my own,” she giggles as she sees Luke turn pink.

She lets him off the hook, and turns her attention to Jack, “Am I going to meet this new girlfriend while I’m here?”

Lux lifts a leg to kick Jack in the arm, “I should still be mad at you, I can’t believe I had to find out you have a serious girlfriend with the rest of gen pop on a fucking TikTok.”

“Sorry, she’s out of town.”

“How convenient,” Lux rolls her eyes, “now I won’t be able to prove I’m not a threat.”

“What are you talking about?”

“I’ve spent our whole friendship proving to girls that we are strictly platonic and there’s nothing to be jealous of.”

“What would they have to be jealous about?”

If it were anyone but Jack the comment might hurt.

“Lots of men actually find me desirable, so a lot of women don’t understand how you don’t see me like that at all. And women can be just as territorial as men.”

“Remember Sam thought you two were dating just because you don’t fucking shut up about Lux.”

“Thank you, Luke, excellent point. And then people see us together and realize that is not the kind of chemistry we share. But without the live experience it’s hard to prove.”

“She’s kind of in a different league than you, she’s definitely not gonna be jealous.”

Lux kicks him a little harder than before.

When they arrive at the apartment, Lux immediately drops her bags and flops on the couch, “This’ll do.”

“You don’t have to sleep on the couch.”

“What are we gonna share? First, we have never been two friends-one bed type of friends, second, we just had the jealous girlfriend talk.”

“Then take Luke’s room,” Jack shrugs.

“Hey!” Luke looks up from his phone to protest.

“I’m not gonna take your room. You’re saving me so much money on hotels, I’m more than okay with the couch.”

“Now that it’s settled, get up, we’re going to dinner.”

Jack grabs her hands and tries to pull her up, Lux goes full limp body.

“Do we have to leave?”

“We just planned to meet up with some guys for dinner, we don’t have any food here” Luke adds, already looking antsy to go, probably more than ready for his next meal.

“Fine, can’t let you waste away,” she dramatically gets off the couch.

“Is that what you’re going to wear?” Jack gives her a once over.

“Do your teammates have some kind of dress code?”

She eyes the boys and their casual outfits that wouldn’t be considered much nicer than her travel clothes.

“No, you just look a little… like you were on a plane,” Jack says like it’s diplomatic, not rude.

“Are you worried I’ll embarrass you in front of your teammates? Cause I can do that with or without changing.”

“Whatever, just– I don’t know fix your ponytail!”

Lux rolls her eyes but takes down her hair and shakes it out, before grabbing a change of clothes just to stop the whining.

“Oh my god guys, I was pretty the whole time! I might be too hot and irresistible for your teammates.” She comes back in tossing her fixed hair over her shoulder.

“And obviously you’d act on that,” Jack tosses her jacket at her.

“What makes you think I wouldn’t fuck one of your teammates? I used to fuck your brother!” Lux shoots Jack incredulous look.

“In fact, I could do both right now, what do you say Lukey?” She winks over at the younger brother.

“Please leave me out of this.”

“Okay, let’s not starve the baby any longer. But reminder, I’m a former WAG, it’s not like I couldn’t get an NHLer if I tried.”

“I’ll start matchmaking then,” Jack wraps an arm around her shoulder and leads her out of the apartment.

The restaurant is a lowkey sushi place. There are only about five Devil’s players, and Lux quickly realizes no other women are gonna be here. She has war flashbacks to the lake house in the summer. 

Lux squeezes herself between Jack and Luke at the table, she wants to have an easy conversation to fall back on.

“So, you’re the famous Lux,” a man with a toothless grin, who Lux learns is Dawson, says from across the table.

“Famous? What have you heard about me?” her stomach twists, probably good things, but Hughes brothers might not be the only ones talking about her.

“With the way he talks about you, I thought Jack was dating you for a while until I learned you were dating Quinn.”

There’s a scuffle under the table, “Oh right, sorry about the break up.”

Lux flushes, “Um- it’s been a while don’t worry about it, I’m not still heartbroken.”

“Well, the other two Hughes brothers love you a lot, always telling stories about you. And Nico said you were really nice.”

“Oh yeah, when you had to introduce your girl best friend to your new best friend,” she pinches Jack’s cheek.

“I took you guys to that place in Greektown,” she perks up a bit, “Is Nico coming tonight?”

Jack eyes her for a second before John Marino butts in, “he bailed, said he was feeling tired.”

The rest of dinner is good, but Lux can feel herself fading fast. And while she’s starting to lean heavily into Jack’s side, he doesn’t seem to get the message.

“You guys want to hear about the time Jack tried to ask out a girl in our chemistry class?”

“Right, you have to get up early, we should go,” Jack is quick to stand.

Luke snickers and doesn’t get to his feet, wants to see where this goes in front of their intrigued teammates.

“After I can talk about when Luke was like 14 or 15 and–“ Luke shoots up and drags Lux up with him.

“Nice to meet you guys, see you later,” Lux calls as they push her out of the restaurant.

:::

She’s hit with the scent of cooking as she comes in the apartment, and takes off her shoes.

“I can finally take this bra off, it’s so uncomfortable but it’s the only one that works with this­– oh. There’s company.”

Lux freezes, one cup of her bra sticking out of her sleeve. Jack is facing the stove, not paying attention.

“Nico’s staying for dinner.”

Nico gives an awkward wave from his spot at the kitchen island with a glass of wine.

“Hi Nico,” she pulls the bra out the rest of the way, “Would have loved a little warning about the company,” then she whips Jack with her bra on her way out, ignoring his protest as she leaves.

She comes back into the kitchen and suddenly feels very exposed in her baggy Lions shirt and old, worn-out short shorts. Her packing hadn’t included thoughts of what to wear in front of men who are basically strangers while hanging around the apartment.

She tries to ignore the heat in her face and confidently take the seat next to Nico, where a new glass of wine is waiting for her.

“Hi Lux, nice to see you again,” he swivels in the barstool, bumping her knee with his.

“You too, even if it didn’t seem like I was before,” she takes a nervous sip of wine.

“Just with the whole bra thing, I try to keep the number of NHLers who’ve seen my nipples to a minimum, it’s probably already too high.”

Nico let’s out a laugh so delightful Lux feels her heart flip. She always thought Nico was cute, but up close and laughing at her jokes, she thinks it’s a bona fide crush now.

Jack scoffs, “You were dared to flash me, so I don’t really count.”

“Okay, so minus Jack, the three is probably enough.”

“Wait, who else saw your nipples?” Jack is less interested in what’s cooking now.

“Quinn, obviously. And Cole at prom; remember the strap on my dress broke, he got and eyeful before he helped cover me up.”

She takes another sip, let Jack’s mind run a bit wild.

“And Lukey walked in on me changing into my swimsuit once.”

The knife Luke is using to chop vegetables clatters onto the cutting board, “You said you’d never tell anyone that!”

“No, I said I wouldn’t tell Quinn that,” and she pretends to look around the room, “and there’s Jack and Nico… no Quinn.”

Luke’s cheeks are burning red and Jack looks like he’s torn between laughing and fuming, which ultimately makes him look a bit constipated.

“You were like 15 and had access to the internet, I doubt my tits were that impactful.”

“Can I throw myself out of a window now?” He looks like he’d prefer to melt into the floor.

Lux stands up and hugs Luke, pinning his arms to his sides, “Don’t worry I won’t let your older brother beat you up over it, though I think you’ve literally grown out of that phase now that you’re taller than him.”

“Now that we know that everyone here but Nico has seen your boobs.”

“We could change that…” Lux chirps at Jack and gets a shove from Luke.

“How was your interview?”

Lux shrugs, “Good, I think… I could not read the interviewer at all.”

“I’m sure you crushed it,” Jack gives her a noogie.

“Thank you for the vote of confidence, but it’s one of the most competitive med schools in America, so I’m not keeping my hopes up too much.”

Before the pair can continue arguing about how smart or not smart Lux is, Nico butts in.

“You’re interviewing for medical schools, right? Where at?

“Today was Columbia, I have Cornell tomorrow, and NYU Friday.”

“All just a train ride away,” Jack says as he starts to move them towards the dining table.

“And I haven’t decided if that’s a pro or con yet,” Lux smirks, before taking a seat.

“So, are you coming to both games?” Nico starts, clearly a ploy to stop the bickering before it really starts, already reading the duo’s antics.

“Of course, she’s coming,” Jack jumps in continues to cut off any protest, “you’ve never seen me play a home game and you’ve never even seen Luke play in the big leagues live!”

“But we agreed one game, two in one week will ruin my whole yearly quota.”

“You’re not a hockey fan?”

“That’s an understatement,” Luke laughs.

“Years with the Hughes family, then becoming a WAG, and we still couldn’t convert her,” Jack says wistfully.

“Maybe The Rock will change your mind,” Nico says thoughtfully.

Lux shrugs, she doesn’t want to rain on his parade, “Who are you playing? Just so I can make sure I don’t get a Zegras jumpscare.”

“He has a girlfriend.”

“I don’t think his relationship status would change how much he enjoys annoying me.”

“We’re not playing the Ducks, plus he’s out with a broken ankle anyway, I don’t think he’s traveling,” Jack adds, his tone hinting that there’s more on that subject he wants to discuss.

“Okay I can tell you’re dying to talk shop, so go ahead,” she’s surprised they let it go on this long.

“We were actually going to talk about the Canucks right before you got here,” Luke say with a little apprehension, always thinking of Lux’s feelings.

“How is Captain Q doing? They’re playing shockingly well, right?”

“I thought you didn’t like hockey?” Jack mocks.

“Our moms talk, I follow hockey players on socials, information gets disseminated.”

Jack makes a face, clearly unsure if that last word means what he thinks it does.

“The Canucks pretty much guaranteed to make it to the playoffs,” Luke probably knows disseminated doesn’t have anything to do with semen.

“Damn, I missed my chance to get a WAG jacket.”

Then the boys are off on tangents about trades and special teams and injuries. Lux silently enjoys the familiar chatter, letting it wash over her like a warm hug. Though she isn’t absorbing any of the information.

 She barely notices when the conversation turns to her while they start to clear the table.

“If you don’t want to sleep on the couch again, Nico has a spare bedroom.” Jack says as if he’s had to repeat himself.

“Excuse me?”

“He lives just upstairs, and has a guest room.”

“I’m staying here to spend time with you, why would I want to stay at some strange guy’s apartment? No offense, Nico.”

“No pressure, if you change your mind the offer is open,” Nico has such a kind smile Lux almost ask if she can stay in his bed.

“Thank you, that’s very nice of you, but I think I’ll stay here.”

Nico nods and says good night before leaving. Lux counts to five after the door shuts behind him.

“What the fuck was that?” Lux glares at Jack.

Jack isn’t quite sure how to respond.

“Why are you trying to pawn me off?”

He shrugs, “I’m not, but he does have a spare room. And it’s nicer to sleep on a bed. And if you happen to hit it off, that’s cool you’ll have another friend when you move here.”

Luke scoffs and retreats to his room, not wanting to get implicated in any scheme.

“So, you have ulterior motives?”

“That makes it sound like my motives are bad, friends are a bad thing now?”

“Friendship isn’t bad, but this feels like you know something I don’t and that makes me very uneasy.”

“I’ve never known something you don’t,” he gives a cheeky smile and Lux rolls her eyes.

He puts the last of the plates in the dishwasher.

“I’m gonna take a shower and go to bed, night Luxxy,” he ruffles her hair as he walks by.

Then she’s alone.

At 9 PM.

Not shooting the shit with her bestie.

Maybe she should have stayed with Nico.

:::

The Cornell interview is a dream. Lux had gone to other interviews and liked a few, but this was different. She was vibing with the interviewer. Everything she learned about the school she loved.

Everything just felt right. 

She was floating on air as she walked the streets toward Central Park. The pizza she stopped for tasted better… although that might have been a New York thing and not a feeling good in the moment thing.

She texts Jack a good luck for the game but doesn’t get a response, she assumes he’s napping or in the zone or something. It’s not a part of their usual texting unless she somehow knows there’s a specifically important game; like when he plays Quinn or the stadium series a few weeks ago.

Lux meets up with a friend from college, who takes her out for drinks then dinner then more drinks. She’s a little tipsy when she gets on the train to Jack’s apartment, insisting to her friend that she doesn’t want to sleep on a futon in her studio apartment.

Halfway there she realizes she should check the score before she gets back. She may not care about hockey but she cares about her friend’s feelings and knowing what kind of mood he’ll be in can only help.

They lost.

Quinn would get quiet and introspective when he lost a game, so it was always easy for Lux. Not only were they not in the same city, but usually he didn’t want to talk. Jack usually got grumpy and wanted to complain. So not the exact environment she was used to or really wanted to be in.

She gets back before the boys somehow. She’s not exactly sure how.

So, she gets ready for bed and turns on the TV, of course it’s already on some channel playing sports highlights. Lux flips around to find something more mindless when they boys come home.

Luke plops down on the couch, suit jacket discarded immediately. Jack sort of awkwardly stands behind the couch, staring at the TV where Lux stopped on a game show.

When neither of them speaks up, Lux fills in the silence.

“Sorry about the loss, but a goal and an assist, that’s pretty cool,” she looks up to Jack with a sad smile, hoping she’s at least a little comforting.

“Mmmhmm,” Jack hums.

She tries a new tactic, “Cornell went well.”

“Cool.”

“I liked it, a lot.” She emphasizes.

“Cool.”

“How about we order pizza, watch bad TV, and not talk then?”

“I’ll pass,” Jack finally moves, heading to his room and shutting the door behind him.

She looks over to Luke, “He’s being weird with me, right?”

“Kind of,” Luke avoids eye contact, his tell when he’s trying protect his brothers in some way.

“We haven’t hung out, just the two of us since I got here. Hell, we haven’t even done a Lux and the Hughes bros night. I want to know if I did something wrong.”

“It’s not you, he was really excited you were coming. Wouldn’t shut up about everything he wanted to show so you’d fall in love with here like he has.”

Lux smirks at that.

“I think the season has been rough for him, he’s been taking it out on himself a little.”

She scoots down the couch and pulls Luke into her side with a hug.

“And how are you doing?” She gives him a squeeze, her instinct to big sister Luke coming out.

“It’s my first full season, I’m just happy to be playing. And Jack’s been taking good care of me.”

“What an insane sentence, but glad you have each other here.”

“And I heard talk of pizza,” he hugs Lux back.

“You’re the local, tell me where to order from,” she ruffles his hair.

:::

Lux wakes up early despite her late night of TV and pizza. She clears off the table before heading towards Jack’s room.

She knocks gently, before just walking in. Though she hovers near the entryway.

“What’s wrong with us?”

Jack’s lying in bed looking at his phone, double chin on full display. Lux would normally make fun of him, or take a picture for her own blackmailing purposes, but now’s not the time.

“What do you mean?” He doesn’t look away from his texting or whatever he’s doing.

Lux crawls into the bed and lays on her side facing him.

“I thought we weren’t ‘share a bed’ friends?”

She rolls her eyes, snatches his phone and throws it to the foot of the bed. It gets lost somewhere in the crumpled duvet.

“When you’ve been using your brother and teammates as a buffer to not be alone with me, I’ll bend our friendship rules.”

“Okay we’re alone, what’s wrong with me?”

“It’s not just a you thing… it’s an us thing.”

Jack finally turns his head to really look at Lux.

“We haven’t talked at all since Christmas, and even then, it was like for 15 minutes between family obligations. And we’re barely texting.”

Lux hates her body for betraying her, tears starting to well up even if she’s more frustrated than sad.

“It feels like right before Quinn broke up with me.”

That gets Jack to sit up, confused, a little angry.

“I’m not fucking breaking up with you.”

“Good, I don’t think I could survive a second Hughes break up.”

Jack sighs, “Just this year has fucking sucked for me, we’re not doing as well– I’m not doing as well as I thought. And you’re in your senior year and applying to med schools, I didn’t want to add my own stress to you.”

“Are you still hurt?”

“Kind of, but we’re like still sort of in the race for a playoff spot and if I can just get us in…”

Lux knows to bite her tongue when it comes to injury management. They’ll play through the pain even if it’s not necessarily the best for themselves, if there’s a chance it’s best for the team.

“And on top of that you get a girlfriend, a meet your parents kind of girlfriend.”

“I guess I’m not over you and Quinn breaking up!”

Lux swallows, tries to put together a coherent thought.

“I know you had a crush on Quinn forever, and I was happy for you guys, but you were my friend first and he kind of ruined that. And now I feel like I have to be careful when it comes to talking about him, or relationships, or even just making fun of you.”

He finally turns onto his side.

“And most importantly I want to talk to you about how Quinn’s girlfriend is so nice it’s kind of annoying.”

“Oh my god, she’s too nice! Do you know she follows me on Instagram? We met like that one time at the lake and she comments on all my pictures about how pretty I am. She knows I’m his ex, right?”

“Oh yeah, it was a whole weird thing when we all played each other the first time. Quinn apparently hadn’t told her explicitly and we made some joke or something and then she just was like ‘oh she’s so nice and pretty, no wonder you liked her.’”

Lux can’t help but laugh.

“I mean maybe I couldn’t handle that like right after the break up, but I was so lost after. I didn’t know how to be a college student without a long-distance boyfriend and still be a good student or friend and whatever, and I was such a bitch at the end of our relationship I thought you wouldn’t be on my side, which you shouldn’t”

“What?”

“We were already having problems, but I purposely made them worse. Like, while I was dodging all his calls, you came to play in Chicago and I made sure that we took a picture together because I knew you’d send it to the family group chat and he’d see I was just living my life.”

“That’s fucked up.”

“I know! I can’t believe he never told you that. He really is like the best brother.”

“Why did you do that?”

“I don’t know, I think I wanted a break but I didn’t know how to ask for one, so I ruined it. And sometimes I think if we took a break maybe we’d get back together again, but also, I just don’t think we were meant for long term.”

She reaches across to grab Jack’s hand, “But us… this shit is forever. We have almost nothing in common and you’re still the first person I want to call with big news or if I need advice, which is crazy cause you’re one of the dumbest people I know.”

Jack laughs, it’s a little wet. They have to ignore it because they love each other but it’s not emotional like this.

“Okay, so I’ll still be your future kids cool Uncle Jack? Even if we’re not blood related?”

“Of course.”

“Okay enough of this emotional stuff, it’s very gross.”

“But what if we kissed right now,” Lux wiggles her eyebrows while trying to keep a straight face.

Jack shoves her hard enough she teeters dangerously on the edge of the bed, as she howls with laughter.

“Oka, now tell me why you’re trying to set me up with Nico?”

“He’s brunette with a lot body hair but almost none on his chest, that’s your type.”

“Oh my god! Shut up, that is not my type,” Lux covers her face, masking her laughs and her embarrassment.

“Palmer from high school was a fucking wolf man.”

“Okay, well recent studies show that’s not my type.”

Jack gags.

“Nico may also sort of be seeing this woman who’s massive bitch to him. And I like him and I like you, so maybe if you hit it off… it would be good for everyone. And make you want to move here.”

“I’m not making life altering decisions based on boys… even for cute Swiss boys or platonic soulmates.”

The door opens suddenly, “We’re gonna be late for morning skate, dude.”

“What if we had been having sex, dude?” Lux says while stretching out on the bed.

“Then the world would be ending, so it wouldn’t really matter,” he rolls his eyes, “I’m pulling out of the garage in 10 minutes with or without you.

“Want to go shopping later?” Jack asks Lux as he gets out of bed

“Are you paying?”

He scoffs, “Sure.”

“Then I’m in. Have fun at morning skate, I’m gonna nap in your bed.”

:::

Things snap back into place almost immediately, like it was more effort pushing each other away than just letting themselves get pulled into each other’s orbit.

And all feels right in the world again.

Thursday is another game day; Lux is reading on the boys’ balcony while they nap. She jolts when the sliding door opens.

“Sorry to scare you,” Nico in a suit sits down across from her, “they still napping?”

“Yes? I don’t know their routines. Why are you here?”

“We’re carpooling.”

They sit quietly for a bit, before Lux finally puts her book down.

“It’s been a while since I’ve been to a game, is this appropriate attire?” She stands up and does a goofy little spin.

“What are you doing?” Jack asks from the doorway, a playful smirk on his face like he’s getting away with something.

“I’m asking if I’m dressed alright, since I’m sitting in your girlfriend’s spot with all the WAGs.”

“I’m surprised you didn’t force her to wear your jersey,” Nico laughs, “but you look nice, won’t even have to change when we go out after the win.”

“Oooh you’re ready to put on a show for me?”

“You could use some make up though,” Jack adds.

Lux just flips him off.

A sleepy looking Luke comes to the door, “Don’t let Lukey drive, he looks like an accident ready to happen.”

“Try to have fun tonight,” Jack hugs Lux.

Normally she’d say something snarky, like ‘try to win then.’ But after their heart to heart, that feels like a twist of the knife.

“I’ll try to be the best good luck charm.”

Lux gets to her seat five minutes into the first period in an attempt to avoid any awkward introductions. Not that she’s against meeting new people, but without social butterfly Jack by her side, she relapses into her shyer ways.

Still, the group tries to include her, shocked she hasn’t seen Jack play in Jersey and forcing her to take a picture where the mascot is holding her bridal style.

She has a couple drinks, cheers when Jack gets an assist, and pretends she doesn’t cheer louder when Nico gets an assist on the game winning goal.

She won’t admit it, but it’s the most fun she’s had at a hockey game, maybe ever.

The women lead her down to the family room while they discuss where they want to go out. Lux is buzzing with adrenaline she was not expecting, ready to follow everyone for a night out with no complaint.

Luke and Jack come out of the locker room simultaneously. Lux is about to jump on Jack when she remembers what he said about his shoulder, so she jumps on Luke’s back instead.

“Lukey, you were so good out there,” she squeezes him tight and ruffles Jack’s hair while she has the height advantage.

“I was -1,” he starts to let her go so she slides off his back.

“I don’t know what that means, so it can’t be that important.”

She gives Luke another hug then turns her attention to Jack, who wraps an arm around her shoulder.

“Guess you were a good luck charm.”

“And yet, you couldn’t score a goal for me.”

“Gotta keep you wanting more.”

She sticks her tongue out at him.

“I heard there were talks of going out? I have an interview tomorrow so the sooner that starts the better.”

They end up at a trendy bar on the other side of the river with about half the team and their significant others. She lets Jack talk her into taking a shot about two steps into the establishment.

She laughs, she dances, she drinks a bit too much. Her head starts to spin and she makes her way to the patio, the chilled air feels good and clears her vision.

A cold glass of water brushes against her arm.

“You probably should hydrate.”

“Thanks,” she smiles up at Nico.

“Did you have fun tonight? At the game?”

“Yeah, but don’t tell Jack it’ll go to his head.”

“Might be a con if you end up picking Cornell, he’ll make you come watch all the time.”

“I think med school is a good excuse to miss out.”

Nico shrugs, “I’d miss my good luck charm.”

The early spring air is chilly, but a gust of warm air comes over Lux. ‘This is flirting. Nico is flirting with me,’ rings in her head while she struggles to be charming, or smooth in response.

Of course, that’s when the clock strikes midnight and she turns back into a pumpkin, or really Jack interrupts the moment.

“Luxxy, time to leave! I won’t be the reason you’re late or hungover for your interview.” He yells from the doorway of the bar, for maximum embarrassment.

Lux close her eyes and lets out a sigh. Then lets a final burst of liquid confidence bubble up to the surface.

“I might not see you before I leave, so let me give you my phone number,” she holds out her hand for his phone, which he unlocks and hands over.

“Partially, because seeing this happen will make Jack lose his mind. And it would be nice to have another friend if I move out here.”

Nico is kind of dumbstruck as he nods along, “Friends are nice.”

“Especially cute friends,” she holds back a grin and gives him a kiss on the corner of his mouth.

He turns an adorable shade of pink.

“What was that?” Jack says as she walks by taking him in tow.

“What? Isn’t that what you wanted?”

:::

The last interview goes fine. Not great, but at least she isn’t hungover for it.

Her flight out is at an ungodly time the next morning, so she insists on an early bedtime from her chauffeurs.

Which is how she ends up sitting alongside the river, brown bagging beers with the Hughes brothers, watching the sun set.

“So, am I going to meet the new girlfriend at the lake this summer?”

“You’re actually coming to the lake house this summer?”

“If I can embarrass you in front of your new girlfriend? Absolutely.”

“I’m giving your room to Trevor,” beer sloshes out of his can when he elbows her.

“C’mon, this might actually be my last summer at the lake. I’m becoming a doctor; I think I’ll be busy. Or maybe I’ll meet someone.”

“Someone who will whisk you off to Switzerland?” Jack wiggles his eyebrows and Luke make smooching sounds.

“Anything is possible,” she raises her beer and drinks to that.

[cementcornfield]

https://www.tumblr.com/cementcornfield/754280825602932736

Hi new to this fandom and was told this is the Joe’marr blog . I’d love to know your favorite moment between these two and how would you describe this dynamic cause it seems like Ja’Marr don’t play

Hi anon, welcome to the fandom and to joe'marr in general! and lol yes i do definitely post about them a lot!

ja'marr does NOT play, i agree! neither of them do about each other i'd say <3. i've described my perception of their dynamic a few times in asks (and! important to remember it's just my perception because we don't actually know any of these men personally) but here goes way too many words about it below the cut 🫡

differences and similarities

to me, they're two good friends who are seemingly very different, but complement each other well, and are actually very similar on the inside! ja'marr is outwardly more extroverted, warmer and friendlier, while joe isn't cold, necessarily, but he seems to take longer to warm up to people in general; he's never friendly just to be friendly ("he'll walk right by you and not smile" per ja'marr), and, despite recent appearances lol, is more of an introvert. (although honestly, ja'marr recently has said he's starting to prefer staying in playing video games and joe has been more out and about! so it seems like they may be rubbing off on each other!) but at their core they're both stubborn, strong, brave and have an edge to them that i think they've recognized in each other since day 1 (all those fights at LSU practices! a love of taunting!)

taking care of each other

they care about each other a tremendous amount and it seems like they are always trying to take care of each other in their own ways. ja'marr with his (maybe???) buying joe clothes and taking him out and wanting him to live his life (he must be thrilled about France Joe), and always defending him in the press (and on twitter lmao). joe always getting in extra throwing sessions with ja'marr (including and most importantly ja'marr's rookie year when he was struggling and they'd stay after practice getting extra work in), always talking up ja'marr's talent and intelligence and work ethic in the press, and he basically guaranteed him a spot on the team during the 2021 draft.

mind reading - good

they've known each other for 6 (SIX!!) years now and according to both of them they "don't need words" to understand each other at this point. which is maybe my FAVORITE thing to analyze about them lmao. because that's definitely obvious on the field. i don't think i really understood how special their on-the-field connection is (despite announcers and coaches and analysts talking about it constantly!) until i finally started understanding how the game actually works (lol i didn't watch football until 2 years ago and started understanding it even later). like, ja'marr's ability to know when to break out of his route, when to improvise when joe needs him to, and joe's ability to know exactly where ja'marr's going to be??? and all of this is happening in SECONDS while people are actively trying to bring them down through any means possible?? that's such an impossible feat and it's one they pull off all the time! and this translates to off the field for them too. one of my favorite clips ever is ja'marr describing how he can tell how joe's feeling just by how he walks in the building, and that joe can do the same for him. "i know him like the back of my hand, he knows me like the back of his" like??? ok boys! that's some soulmate shit actually!

mind reading - bad

BUT on that note, i do think that, ironically, this ability to "read each others' minds" sometimes could lead to miscommunication for them! or at least it could lead to them NOT saying things that maybe they should say out loud. i don't have a lot of concrete examples here (obviously because if they're not saying things to each other they aren't saying them to the press) but there's an interview where ja'marr's talking about his hip injury. and how he "never talked to joe about it" but he "knew in his mind that he'd come back when joe needed him" which ???? what are you talking about ja'marr?? the double mind reading there of a. expecting joe to know that he'll come back when he needs him but also b. expecting himself to know when joe would need him! like! that seems really complicated, you could just, talk to each other? maybe?

ja’marr also said that joe didn’t believe him when he told him that his presence was enough at practice, that joe thought he was joking (i guess it’s not commonplace for ja’marr to come right out and say how important joe is to him and the team! so joe probably wouldn't know what to make of that rare moment of sincerity!)

and i think they aren't talking to each other about contracts (which, fair enough, that's business), but people sure were asking ja'marr about joe's contract anyway (and they're starting to do the same for joe about ja'marr!) and we all remember a lot of ja'marr's comments that came around to bite him lol. and, i have NO proof for this one besides my projections/feelings, but i wonder if joe's worried at all about ja'marr's contract this year. if he's worried that if he doesn't perform, ja'marr won't want to stay. now, ja'marr tells the press (and twitter. and his twitch chat. and his dad.) that he wants to stay with joe, but does joe believe that? has ja'marr ever come out and actually said that to him? or is he expecting joe to just know that?

(oh man i wrote a lot in that section, and i have so little actual evidence, but it's something i love thinking about! i don't want them being too cutesy or perfect tbh. they're flawed! they're men raised in stoic sports culture and honestly i am so sure they suck at communicating. i'm sure they've had misunderstandings. i'm sure they've argued. and that's so important!)

balance

i think another thing i love about their dynamic is that ja'marr is such a good check for joe. if you haven't noticed, joe kind of runs the organization lmao. from day 1 he's been involved in the play calling, drafting, overall culture and philosophy. and that's his right! he is good at all of that! he's The Franchise (worshipped throughout the team, the city, half of the state!) and, in the beginning, i think ja'marr felt that way about joe too. joe led him to a perfect season and a national championship in college and then a super bowl his first year in the league! he himself said, right before the super bowl in 21, "he's like a god to me" which is...just a WILD thing to say about your friend :') like??? the devotion? the loyalty?? okay ja'marr!!

but, then they lose, and ja'marr "coaxes joe out of bed" to go celebrate anyway. he gets to be the one to see joe at his absolute lowest and he's the one to build him back up. and i think that really affected their dynamic from then on, to the point that ja'marr became the only guy to think of joe as an actual human being in the organization. i don't think (until very very recently with zac) that a single person other than ja'marr ever said no to joe (the way joe stayed in that titans game last year despite being hurt, at risk, and losing by so much cemented that for me!) ja'marr was the ONLY ONE to say that joe should sit out as long as he needed to for the calf. the only one not celebrating (in fact, he seemed PISSED) when joe was running around during preseason games despite not being fully healed 😭 the only one saying "come on joe let's go out" instead of just coming to him (and it seems that's finally worked lol) and joe NEEDS that. he needs that desperately! someone who will support him but call him on his shit, someone who sees him as more than just his abilities and wants what's actually best for him!

teasing <3

finally (oh my god this is SO LONG) i really enjoy how playful they are with each other. joe tends to be very Stoic and Serious (not all the time, but it's a tendency) and i think ja'marr is good at bringing him out of that. he's talked about how back at LSU he would joke around with joe and it took him a long time to finally figure out how to make him smile and laugh. and i think that's a skill he's perfected over the years! every mic'ed up between the two of them, we get to hear them tease and mess with each other. "you see that big blue thing over there??" "you couldn't overthrow me and get me in stride?" "my guy you were wide open!" (ja'marr's hands on joe's hips the entire time) "you're looking pretty slow" "be serious" and "he said you underthrew him" "yeah right" and "i ain't gonna lie, you look slow as hell" and "i'll start taking it off for you ja'marr" and "joe swears he's sneaky fast" and "hey man you're so cool!" and on and on and on! i HATE that we've never had a long form interview/podcast with BOTH of them on it because my god i want to know what an actual conversation is like between them. but i think it must be a lot of that. a lot of fond jokes, compliments hidden in teasing; we see them laughing together so often <3 and of course we CAN'T forget the UFC moves they practice on each other :) "we mess around every now and then".

the end

okay i'm stopping myself because oh my god this is so much. anon i'm sorry, you absolutely aren't going to read all of this. but it's been two years and i STILL apparently have so much to say about these two. it's ridiculous. i'm ridiculous. (but so are they!!)

[arlana-likes-to-write]

Lightning Bug - Chapter 19

Master List

Warning: fluff, like a lot of fluff, mention of past trauma, touch deprivation 

Word count: 4.9k 

You weren’t in your room, that much you knew but opening your eyes to look around was a feat in itself. Everything felt heavy. You gathered your remaining strength and opened your eyes. Big mistake. The lights were far too bright and it caused your head to throb. Immediately, shutting them again and a small whimper left your lips. A voice said your name. You tried to determine who it was but your head hurt too much. They said it again. This time you slowly opened your eyes and turned your head slightly towards the voice. It was Helen, so you must be in med bay. “What happened?” You asked. Your throat was killing you and you had no memory of what occurred. 

“You're in med bay,” she said. “Does anything hurt?”

“Just my head,” you winced as you sat up. 

“That is to be expected,” she handed you a cup of water. You downed the entire thing. “Do you have any memory of what happened?” You thought about it. It was like someone went in and erased part of your memory. “You had an attack, fell, and hit your head on your nightstand. You’ve been unconscious for a little over 2 days.” 2 days?! That was a first. “We are saying you had a seizure but we both know that’s not true,” she sat in the empty chair next to you. You heard voices in the hallway. 

“Do they know?” She nodded her head. You looked down at your uncovered hands. “I’m so afraid of myself, Dr. Cho.” You admitted. There was so much blood on your hands. 

“Are you afraid because people told you to be afraid and corrupted the viewpoint you have of yourself?” You didn’t respond. “Bruce was afraid of the Hulk. America and Wanda feared their powers and I can guess that Natasha feared the person the Red Room tried to create. You live with a group of people who understand that fear but you need to let them in and allow them to shoulder that fear with you,” you saw her glance at your hands. “How long has it been since someone friendly touched your skin?”

“Too long,” you whispered, tears pooling at the corner of your eyes. The only person that was never afraid of you was your brother. “Is Natasha here?” You vaguely remember her saying she had to leave for a mission with Wanda. Helen nodded. “Can you get her me? I’d leave to speak with her alone.” You watched Helen leave your room and close the door. With a sigh, you looked up at the ceiling. A weird feeling began to form in your stomach. It wasn’t jealousy or the tingling feeling you felt when your powers needed to be released. You pinpointed the feeling to nervousness. 

It felt like a lifetime ago when you made a bucket list and on your list was to hug Natasha. You wondered how her hands would feel against yours or her arms around you as she hugged you. Would she even hug you or would she turn you away?

That feeling began to grow. It made your body warm up and a small smile formed on your lips. For the first time in a long time, you felt okay. 

*

The door closing caused Natasha to look up and the conversation stopped. The Black Widow wasn’t sure what Kate, Yelena, and America were talking about, to focused on the door in front of her. “Are her vitals still good?” Natasha asked the doctor. She was becoming concerned about how long it’s been. Helen smiled.   

“Great actually,” she said. “She’s awake and wants to talk to you, alone,” she looked at the Black Widow. 

“Me?” She questioned. Helen nodded. 

“I’ll give you some space and I’ll come back to check on her later.” Natasha sighed, looking at the door that separated her and the young girl. 

“Why do you think she only wants to talk to me?” She asked her girlfriend. 

“Just don’t sit there and go find out,” Yelena said, pushing on her back. Natasha rolled her eyes and stood up. She felt Wanda squeeze her hand before she walked over to the door. Letting out a shaky breath and trying to push down her nervousness, she opened the door. The door closing behind her caused the teen to look up. 

“Hi Nat,” she whispered. Her voice was so soft. No matter how many times Natasha looked into her eyes the color took her breath away. But she was so glad to see them because it meant she was okay. They looked different somehow as she made her way to the chair she sat in for the past 2 days. “I’m sorry you and Wanda got pulled from your mission,” the teen continued. 

“Don’t apologize. Your health and well-being are far more important. Besides I would rather be here than kissing some politician’s ass,” Natasha expected her to smile instead she frowned. 

“This is still new to me,” she said. “The idea that people generally care about me. For my entire life,” she hit the bed. “I’ve been hurt by people that shouldn’t have hurt me and I’ve been called horrible names because of something I was born with. I was a freak, a monster, and an abomination,” her voice creaked and Natasha saw her eyes swell with tears but they didn’t fall. “I’ve learned to fear myself because of what others called me and forced me to do,” she looked at Natasha and the sight was breaking the Black Widow’s heart. “I don’t want to be afraid anymore. I’d like to try to open up to all of you and tell you what happened to me.” 

“Whenever you're ready we’ll listen.”

“I don’t want to be afraid anymore,” she repeated and raised her hand to Natasha. The teen nodded, a sign to tell it was okay. Natasha felt her stomach drop as she whipped her hand on her pant leg and raised her own. Green eyes locked onto blue to try to find any second guessing but Natasha saw none. So connected their hands. She was surprised at how soft they were, a little dry from years of being covered. The teen gasped and Natasha tried to pull her hand back but she held it tighter. Tears started to fall down her face. “It’s been so long,” she whispered. “So long since hands that won’t hurt me have touched my skin,” she was staring at their connected hands. Finally, she looked up. “Can -?” She cleared her throat. “Can I have a hug?” 

“Of course,” Natasha tried to keep her voice steady as she didn’t want to sound too excited. This was something she’s been wanting for so long. She stood up and sat on the edge of the hospital bed, opening her arms. There was some understandable hesitation but Natasha wanted her to make the first move. Soon the teen hugged the Black Widow. She waited for her to get used to the feeling before wrapping her arms around her. Y/n tensed up and Natasha feared she did something to trigger the young girl but she relaxed. Natasha adjusted her position on the bed as she felt tears stain her shirt. The girl’s whole body was shaking. “Sh molniyenosnyy zhuk (lightning bug),” Natasha whispered. “You're safe. I got you.” She kissed the top of her head. The small action and statement caused a sob to escape her and Natasha held her tighter. 

*

All of your senses were consumed by the Black Widow and it was overwhelming. You wondered if she could feel how fast your heart was beating but you couldn’t bring yourself to care. When Natasha touched your hand, her skin was warm against yours. Her hand was rough due to years of training and her fingers had calluses on them. She didn’t hesitate when you asked for a hug and you never felt more safe than in her arms. Her hands rubbed soothing circles on your back. The last time you were held like this was with your brother and that was so long ago. Natasha moved slightly and her hand left her back. You couldn’t help the whine that left your lips. “Sh, milyy (sweetie), I’m not going anywhere.” You heard footsteps approaching you. Glancing, you saw it was Wanda. 

“Hi,” she said. “I just wanted to make sure you are okay. I can leave if you want.” You ended the hug with Natasha, missing her warmth immediately. 

“I’m okay,” you said. “I want you to stay,” you looked at Wanda’s hands. How would they compare to Natasha’s? You mirrored the same action with Natasha and held out your hand. Unlike her girlfriend, Wanda didn’t hesitate to take your hand. “Your hand is so soft!” It was true. The witch had no calluses on her fingers. Wanda giggled at your blunt comment, and your cheeks blushed. 

“I use a good moisturizer,” she smiled. Wanda let her hand so they were palm to palm, comparing the size difference. Once you were done, you instinctively rested your head on Natasha’s shoulder. “Are you up for more visitors?” She asked. You nodded and Wanda walked back to the door. 

“Molniyenosnyy zhuk,” you said. “What’s that mean?” You looked up at her and she was smiling. She said it a few more times for you to get it right. 

“It means a lightning bug,” her smile grew. “Do you know how lightning bugs glow?” You shook your head. “When I was about your age, Yelena and I were in the backyard with our mom and she told us they can convert chemical energy into the glowing light we see called bioluminescence,” she explained. 

“Kind of like me,” she nodded. 

“Yes, exactly like you,” Natasha tapped you on the nose causing you to scrunch it. “So you are a molniyenosnyy zhuk.” You liked it. It was the first time you’ve had a nickname. Smiling, you burrowed your head into Natasha’s side. She smelt like vanilla and you wondered if it was from her perfume or Wanda’s. The sound of the door opening caused you to sit up a little. It was Yelena, Kate, and America. You smiled at the sight of your friends. 

“Gave us quite a scare,” Yelena teased, making your cheeks blush and offering her a shy smile. You let Natasha move away and allowed the trio to come closer. 

“Sorry about that,” you said, scratching the back of your head. “That attack,” you still weren’t sure what to call it. “Took me by surprise.” 

“Could you tell when they would come?” Wanda asked. You nodded. It felt weird talking about it. This was a secret you kept close to your heart because you were forced to. 

“It starts with a tingle in my palms,” you told them. “It doesn’t happen all the time only if there is a lot of energy or my emotions are all over the place,” you sighed, looking down at your hands. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean for this to happen,” you said honestly. 

“It’s okay bud,” Kate smiled. “We are just glad you are okay.” You were glad too because if you weren’t you wouldn't be able to get a hug from Natasha or feel Wanda’s hands. You raised your hands to Kate and Yelena. The couple stole a glance at each other before connecting their hands with yours. It was a strange contrast. Yelena’s hand was cold but you couldn’t tell if it was from her rings or she was just normally cold. Her hands were smooth, unlike her sisters. Now for Kate’s hand, it was warm and her hands were rough from using her bow. You let go of their hands. 

“Thank you for trusting me,” you told them. “Not many people do.” 

“Trust is a two-way street,” Yelena said. “So thank you for trusting us.” You looked at America, who was oddly quiet. You could feel her nervous energy radiating off of her as you raised her hand. But she didn’t take it. 

“Are you sure?” She asked instead. You squint your eyes, tilting your head at her question. “Do you remember the last time we were together?” Of course, you did. You were so scared that she was going to hate you or everyone was going to be mad. But they weren’t. 

“I do,” you smiled. “But I’m done being afraid. You're my best friend.” Her eyes widened at your concession and soon she took your hand. It was hard to describe the feeling of her hand in yours. It felt right. You felt your face heat up and quickly let go of her hand, not missing the smirks on Natasha and Wanda’s faces. “So,” you said, whipping her hands on the blanket. They felt very sweaty all of a sudden. “Fill me in on everything I’ve missed.” 

*

“Knock, knock,” the laughter stopped as the door opened and you saw Pepper and Tony walk in. “Are you up for two more visitors?” 

“Yeah!” You said but you were distracted by the table that Tony wheeled in with a blanket covering a tower-like structure. 

“What’s that?” Kate asked. 

“A little surprise for the kid,” Tony smiled at you. “But we have to wait for Bruce  so please continue this cute family moment.” Wanda waved her hand and two chairs appeared for Tony and Pepper. You were amazed by her powers, a little jealous of the things she could do with them. The conversation continued as stories were passed around. Tony and Natasha went back and forth telling the story of Natasha’s undercover work in Stark Industries. Her fighting Happy in the boxing ring sent you into a fit of giggles. Your laughter continued as Yelena told stories about her and Natasha’s father. It was nice to sit and laugh with them. You felt normal.   

“I thought I had a two-person visiting policy,” Helen teased, walking into your room. 

“To be fair that rule was only when I was unconscious,” you smiled. The doctor glared but you saw no real threat in it. 

“You're worse than Natasha,” the Black Widow gasped, clutching her chest. 

“I’m a perfect patient, thank you very much,” Helen rolled her eyes as the group erupted into laughter. She started to check on your vitals and the tablet Tony was holding began to ring. 

“Hey Big Green,” Tony answered. “Say hello to the star of the hour,” he turned the tablet around. You saw Bruce standing in a lab you didn’t recognize. 

“Glad to see you are okay,” he smiled. 

“Hi Bruce,” you waved at the doctor. Your eyes went back to the covered object as everyone said their hellos. “So,” you said, slowly. “Can I see what’s under the blanket?” Tony laughed. 

“I’m calling it the Stark Recharge,” the billionaire said, handing the tablet to Pepper and taking off the blanket. There was a big red target connected to a metal coil spring. At the end of the spring was a box with 4 batteries. Each batter had a meter to monitor their charge. 

 “What is it?” America asked. 

“It kind of looks like a cell tower,” Yelena said, with her head tilted. You giggled. 

“Cho said it’s important to use your powers,” you looked at the doctor, who was nodding her head. “This is a safe and controlled way for you to use them,” Brue said. 

“You hit this target with your powers and the electricity you produce charges these batteries,” Tony explained. “These batteries will be sent to homeless centers and countries that need them.”

“It’s so you can relearn that your powers aren’t something to be afraid of,” Pepper added. You looked at the CEO. “That when applied correctly they can do some good.” Have you ever used your powers for good? Your parents never wanted you to use them unless it was a way to benefit them which turned into being at the church for long hours to power it. With HYDRA, there were no good moments just pain, torture, and bloodshed. All of your life, your powers were used to break the law and cause so much pain. 

“Can I try it?” You asked the group. Natasha looked at Helen for her final say. 

“Yes,” she finally said after some thought. “Just don’t overdo it.” She took off the ekgs and the clear tube around your nose. With the help of Wanda, you got out of bed. The ground was cold on your bare feet as you stood in front of the machine. 

“So I just aim for the target,” Tony nodded. “And if I miss?” You questioned. 

“Then you miss and hit the wall,” he shrugged. “Walls are easy to fix.” You nodded, shaking out your legs and arms. 

“It’s been a while since I’ve used them. You might want to stand back.” But they didn’t move. They trusted you so you just had to trust yourself. You sighed, closing your eyes. It was so strange how a few harsh words and punishments could change your perspective on yourself. There was a time you liked the stuff you could do. You were like a superhero in the books you read. You let out a shaky breath, steadying the beat of your heart. Then you focused on their heartbeat, the energy they were creating, and the electricity in the room. It was strong and steady and for a very long time since you weren’t afraid. Your fingers began to move, mimicking the way a pianist played the piano. You felt your fingers and hands tingle. You looked at your hand and watched the electricity dance around your fingers. Smiling, you extended your arm, and the stream of electricity left and traveled toward the machine. A direct hit on the target and the batteries began to fill. When they were at 100%, you cut off the stream. Your chest was heaving, not used to using your powers. 

“How do you feel, molniyenosnyy zhuk (lightning bug)?” You looked at the Black Widow. 

“Good,” you said honestly. “Like a weight has been lifted off my chest. I can breathe easily again.” 

*

Helen cleared you that evening. After a shower and a quick dinner, you found yourself on the couch laying on Kate’s stomach as she flipped through the streaming services to find a movie. It was so different from cuddling with her over a blanket. You could feel the warmth she radiated off and sometimes she could run her fingers through your hair. “Are you stealing my girlfriend?” Yelena asked, sitting by your feet. “Can I pet your legs on my lap?” You nodded and she lifted your legs.  

“I’m not stealing her,” you smiled. “Just burrowing her.” You felt Kate’s laughter rumble through her. 

“We can cuddle anytime,” she said. “Alright, when I’m not cuddling Lena.” She added on quickly. The blonde’s cheek turned a light pink which caused you to giggle. 

“What are you watching?” America asked, climbing over the couch to sit next to Kate. She had a bowl of popcorn and you took some from her. 

“No clue,” Kate said, throwing the remote at Yelena. “Pick something.” The Russian rolled her eyes. “Oh I’m about to lose my cuddle buddy in 3,2, and 1,” Kate mumbled as Wanda and Natasha sat on the other side of the couch. Your body tensed up as you stared at the couple but you didn’t move. “Go on,’ Kate said. You looked up at the archer. 

“Are you sure?” You asked. Kate nodded with a smile. You sat up and walked over to the couple, fidgeting with your hands. 

“Can I sit with you guys?” You asked, pointing to the space between them. 

“Pop a squat, squirt,” Natasha said, moving over slightly. You sat down, resting your head on Natasha’s shoulder. 

“I’m putting on the Greatest Showman,” Yelena said. “Any objections? No. Perfect.” You didn’t care what you watched, perfectly content with being right here. 

*

  It wasn’t long before Natasha noticed the teen falling asleep against her. “Do you want to go to bed?” Natasha whispered. She shook her head, instead, she moved closer to Natahsa and rested her head on her chest. Wanda maneuvered the girl’s legs across her lap. A small smile formed on her face. 

“Can I see your magic?” She asked the witch, keeping her voice too low to not disturb the movie. Wanda nodded and her fingers began to glow. To Natasha’s surprise, the girl raised her hand and the flow moved from Wanda’s fingers to her own. “It feels alive,” she whispered. “Like a small heartbeat.” She connected their hands and the red glow was put out. Natasha saw tears forming in her girlfriend’s eyes. “I like it,” she closed her eyes. Soon her breathing evened out and she was asleep, still holding on tightly to Wanda’s hand. 

“Are you okay?” Natasha asked, putting her hand on the back of Wanda’s neck and playing with the baby's hair. 

“Yeah,” she whispered, looking at their connected hands. “I’m great.” 

*

“So where is this ring from?” You asked, holding onto Yelena’s hand and looking at the rings. You and the blonde were tasked with breakfast duty. It was probably easier to order and have Happy pick it up but you wanted to see Annie and get a hug from her. Yelena looked at the ring you asked about. 

“It’s a handle of a spoon made into a ring,” she said, taking it off and handing it to you. It was a very unique design and it was impressive that it was a spoon. “One of the Widows we saved opened up a small business to sell them.” 

“It’s beautiful,” you handed it back to her. “I think I want some rings. But I don’t think it’s a good idea to wear them. You know with the whole ability to produce electricity,” Yelena chuckled, allowing you to take her hand again. 

“How does it feel to have everyone know?” She asked. You tilted your head as you thought about it. You haven’t had much time to think about it. It was weird, and bizarre to have a group of people know what you could do and not blink an eye. They acted like nothing changed. 

“Kind of weird,” you admitted. “I guess it’s another thing I have to get used to.” Yelena opened the door to the cafe. The familiar bell announced your presence in the busy cafe. Annie looked up and she smiled when she saw you. She spun around to talk to someone but you weren’t close enough to hear what she said. Annie left the counter and a young girl took her place. “Did you hire someone?” You asked as she walked over to you. 

“We did,” she led you over to her office. “We’ve been busy and we needed extra help.” She opened the door and ushered you in. “How are you, sugar?” She asked as the door closed behind you. “They told me you were hurt.” You looked at the Russian, unaware that Annie was informed. She shrugged. 

“She’s important to you so she’s a part of this family,” you smiled. 

“I’m good actually. The best I’ve been.”

“That’s great!” She excitedly said. “I’m so happy for you.” It was now or never you thought, playing with the bottom of your shirt. 

“We came here for more than just food,” she tilted her head. “Can I have a hug?” You asked. The surprise on her face made you smile. For as long known as the Breaux, they knew your fear of touching others. “I don’t think I’ve ever said thank you to you and Paul,” you said, trying to look anywhere besides the woman in front of you. “You saved my life so thank you.”

“Oh sweetheart, come here,” she held out her arms. Without hesitation, you hugged her. Her arms wrapped around you. She was warm and smelt like cinnamon, sugar, and coffee. It smelt like home. 

*

“You wanted to speak with us,” Natasha said, sitting down in the empty chairs in front of Helen’s desk with Wanda. FRIDAY notified the couple that the doctor wanted to speak with them. It filled Natasha with unnecessary anxiety. 

“It’s nothing bad,” she told them, closing a file. “How much do you know about touch deprivation?” 

“It occurs when some doesn’t get as much or any physical touch,” Wanda said. Helen nodded. 

“It’s just physical touch but any emotional interaction. A person may feel isolated or experience symptoms of depression,” the doctor explained. 

“You think Y/n is touch deprived.” Natasha guessed where this conversation was headed. 

“Yes. She admitted to not having her skin touched positively for a long time. Skin-to-skin contact is not only for mental and emotional health but physical health, too,” she leaned forward, head resting on her hands. “I love that she’s opening up to all of you and allowing herself that level of comfort but I wanted to go over some things with you.”

“Of course,” Natasha said. “We’ll do anything to help her.” So Helen began to explain ways to help. Give her plenty of positive touch and never associate touch with negativity like pinching or pushing her away. 

“Set boundaries with her and don’t be worried if she regresses to younger behaviors. Her entire life she’s been denied a safe place to receive love, now she has it.” 

“Do you think having her speak with someone could help?” Natasha suggested. She remembered Sam saying he could find someone to talk to. Helen thought for a moment. 

“I think it could do her some good but I wouldn’t spring it onto her now,” she said. “It took a while for her to trust you and she hasn’t fully opened up yet. Give her time to adjust to this new normal.” 

*

You were playing thumb war with Sam on the common floor when the elevator opened. A glance over and you saw Wanda and Natasha. “Ah I won,” Sam said, pinning your thumb with his. You stuck your tongue out at him. 

“Breakfast is from Annie’s,” you told the couple as they walked over to the kitchen. The tower was quiet. America was at the Sanctum, Yelena, Tony, and Maria was in Overwatch, and Kate was working on more trick arrows in the lab. You swung your legs as they made their plate. 

“Have you eaten?” Wanda asked. 

“This girl can eat,” Sam teased, rustling your hair. You pushed his hand away. “Is Helen free?” Natasha nodded. “I’ll see you guys later.” It was not you three alone. 

“Why were you with Helen?” You asked, sipping on your orange juice. 

“She just wanted to go over some stuff about you and your recovery that we can help you with,” you gave her a questioning look. Natasha sighed, taking a small bite of her food. “Do you know about touch deprivation?” She asked. You nodded, crossing your arms. Sometimes you would feel your arms tingle when you watch those around you embrace. An ache in your chest would grow and you knew it was loneliness.” 

“Helen thinks I’m touch deprived,” you said, not able to look at them. The soft hand of Wanda touched your arm. “Natasha was my first hug in 9 years,” you admitted. “Before that, I would get a hug from my brother when my parents weren’t around.” You finally looked up. “I’m sorry I’m so messed up.” You tried to joke to lighten the mood. 

“Sweetheart, you’ve been through a lot of your age,” Natasha said. “We all have baggage that we carry.”

“But now you don’t have to do it alone,” Wanda added. 

“So, you don’t mind that I want to cuddle with you.” It was a fear that was bubbling inside of you. They were only doing this to be nice. 

“Not at all,” Natasha smiled. “And if we can’t or we’re busy we’ll tell you, okay?” You nodded, smiling. 

“I hugged Annie today,” you told them. “It was nice.” 

“I’m proud of you, dorogoy (sweetheart),” you smiled at her praise. “So what’s your plan for today?” You shrugged. You haven’t thought about that. You haven’t read in a while or practiced your Russian but those activities seemed like a lot of work still. So, you were just going to hang around the tower and you told the couple that. “Do you want to hang out with us?” 

“Yes!” You said without any hesitation. “I mean, yes sure sounds good.” Your cheeks flushed at your excitement. Natasha chuckled. 

“That was cute,” your cheeks flushed a deeper pink. “We’ll show you some of our favorite spots in the city. We’ll clean this up and we’ll head out. Do you need anything from your room?” You nodded, waiting to grab your phone. “Perfect! We’ll meet you up there.” You jumped off your seat and took the stairs to your floor. On your nightstand, the yellow rubber gloves were there. You picked them up and sat down on your bed. For the longest time, the gloves were the only thing in your life that was constant. Every morning, afternoon, and night they were there to cover your hands and offered you a sense of protection and safety. 

“Hey,” you looked up at Natasha. “Are you okay?” She asked, leaning against your doorway. 

“Yeah,” you said, hitting the gloves against your hands. “Just thinking,” you put your phone into your pocket and walked into the kitchen. With one final look at the gloves, you threw them away. It was time to move forward and not let fear control your future.  

- 

Taglist:   @aestruvx, @toouncreativeforausername, @modedddd, @julilamoment, @mythixmagic, @yourmamacom, @vicmc624, @cherlenovix, @liliesandrosies, @whitewidowsbite, @clintsbigtoe,   @blackbirdv98   @arualdcg  @yoyo-w​  @natbelovasblog

[0fucsgiveon]

𝓐 𝓣𝓸𝓾𝓬𝓱 𝓞𝓯 𝓕𝓲𝓻𝓮

𝙒𝘼𝙍𝙉𝙄𝙉𝙂𝙎!- choking, possessive behavior, billy!russo x fem!reader, dark!Billy Russo. Knife play, daddy kink, spanking, guns and knifes, murder, drugs and alchol, (Dom sub dynamics) stalking, overstimulation, squirting, slapping, rough topics. Toxicity (let me know if i miss anything!) not proofread

18+ 𝘾𝙊𝙉𝙀𝙉𝙏 𝙈𝙄𝙉𝙊𝙍𝙎 𝘿𝙊𝙉𝙊𝙏 𝙄𝙉𝙏𝙀𝙍𝘼𝘾𝙏

Y/n was a women of power whatever she wanted she got. She was the leader of one of the most top gangs in new york which only consists of women. Though one thing was for sure she despised men they were the annoying fly that she tried to get rid of but they kept comming. That all changed when she decided to make an alliance with the one and only Billy

You took a deep breath the smell of gun powder and smoke filled you nose. The smell was all but familiar it made your heart skip a beat and walk with more force. As you walked along many workers bowed down to you. You loved power the one thing you never had as a little girl and you couldn’t help the smirk that spread across your face. A girl with short red hair and glasses that sat on her nose perfectly, spoke as she fiddled with the pen in her suit. “Mrs, i’m sorry to bother you. But your appointment arrived early and he asked if you could hurry up” 

“Ah i see” you spoke softly and looked at the girl who was shaking. “Good job, go ahead and take a break i know its a little scary, and remember he can’t and wont do anything as long as im here” 

The girl smiled and nodded as she walked away and sat on a nerby couch.

You slowly walked up the stairs carefully listening to the small sounds of heavy feat walking around the room. As you reached the door you slowly opened the door and locked it behind you. Slowly turning to see a guy with rugged clothes and buzzed hair, he had cuts on his face and deep brown eyes that were trailing down your body and up to your face. You stared blankly at him for awhile than slowly sat down on a leather chair crossing your legs. He looked down at your thighs that the slant on your dress exposed to his feasting eyes . “You know were here for business and i don’t like to have my time wasted. Scar face” you spoke with venom as you stared him in the eyes. Billy’s eyebrows furrowed and he walked towards you with a low chuckle. “Listen, sweetheart I’m not here to waste my time either” he turned around and sat down spreading his legs and leaning back.

You scoffed and rolled your eyes before looking back at him. “Before we get down to business i want you to know i hate men and the only reason im talking to you right now is because you have stuff i need and i have stuff you need” 

“Trust me princess ive heard all about your hate towards men and how you had such a fucked up life with your poor dad-“ you threw a knife right at the wall it barley touching his face as you walked over to him placing both of your hands on the arm of his chair. “You have no right to talk about him you understand” 

Billy just smirked and pulled you closer by the chin with his hand. “Don’t worry princess im not here to hurt you or talk about your shitty life” his voice was stern but spoke with a hint of calmness. That made your heart race and feel your cheek’s turn hot. You both sat there in quiet for a moment before you pulled away and sat down pouring a glass of 1980 rose wine. You looked at him intensely before taking a sip and getting back to the discussion.

The meeting was faster than you thought and billy was more agreeable and not as indecisive as people made him out  be. 

“See you later sweetheart” he playfully winked and walked out which caused you  to roll your eye’s.

A few months went by everything was going smoothly. Billy has moved his crew in your hideout, so you seen him a lot more. You would be lying if you actually didn’t appreciate his presence. He would often talk about his past life, which you related too. But he mostly talked about his “psychologist girlfriend”. You didnt like her and practically wanted to rip her head off. Which led you to this situation right now. You forced yourself to look down at the broken window where her hopeless body laid. She tried to kill you so you fought back which led to her bleeding out on the sidewalk surrounded by random people. You felt your heart thump and blood drip down your face to your eyebrow.

 You looked over to see billy with a blank expression than down at the body than back at you. You back up and ran to find your gun. Slowly you crept to the door. “WHERE THE FUCK ARE YOU! AFTER ALL I DONE YOU DO THIS. YOUR FUCKING BITCH” billy kicked the door open and when he was about to turn a corner you knocked him down. “Heh, im the bitch shes the one who fucking started it! I did you a favor! She was sleeping with other guys billy!” You shouted. “Your a fucking liar” he flipped you over and onto the floor. “Hmft, i caught her in the act and was about to call you but she attacked me, his fucking clothes are over there.” He slowly let go of you to turn and look where an unfamiliar man’s clothes were. 

You slowly got up and wiped your eyebrow and the two slashes on your face one on the left cheek and the other on the right corner of your forehead. Billy slowly got up and turned to face you. You stared at him for a second before he ran and put his hands around your throat enough to hurt but not to remove the air from your lungs. He looked into your eyes than at your lips. “Come on bill, are you going to kill me” you smiled before you raised a knife to his throat. “Now why would i do that sweetheart” he slowly leaned in your lips inches apart and the knife slowly creating an almost scratch mark. “Bill-“ he kissed you before you could finish and you slowly let go of the knife before wrapping your arms around his neck. His grip losened on your throat. Sirens were heard and you both stopped before you walked out with billy right on your track. 

When you reached the car you started the engine and sped off. The whole ride was silent. “So your just not going to talk” his voice spoke gently. You cleared your throat “theres nothing to talk about.” You pressed the gas peddle going at 90 now. “Sweetheart, i know your lying” he glared at you.

“Look, I don’t got time for this billy” you glared at him. He scoffed and rolled his eyes. “Fuck if your going to act like this than stop the car.” You slammed the breaks and looked at him. “Just get the fuck out okay.” He scoffed and open the door slamming it behind him.

One thing was for sure you would never tell him was you were the girl he used to play with the girl with the shitty pedophile of a dad. You slammed you head against you seat speeding to  the hideout.

It had been two weeks since the fight you guys had. You hadn’t heard or seen from him since than. You played with your knife examining it, tracing over the edges with your finger tip. Slowly you sat up placing the knife in a secret compartment. Walking out of the room your heels  clicking against the wooden floor in the quiet house. Making your way to the kitchen you took out glass of red wine. You looked at the corner of your eye, he was there just staring at you blankly. In his tight black demin jeans with a tight black shirt to match. What you wouldnt do to rip it right of him and leave marks all over his body. His grunt caught your attention and your turned over to look at him than look away. 

Not bothering to give him the time of day you walked right past him sitting down crossing your legs. “ah, i see your still mad at me sweetheart” his voice rang in your ears like a soft melody you haven’t listen to in awhile. Ignoring him you took a sip, finally turning to look at him he was already in front of you looking down at you. You slowly looked up. “What are you doing here this late billy. What do you want?” Your voice sounded cruel, you saw the way his jaw clench and he took a deep breath. “ i -i came to say sorry, fuck y/n im so fucking sorry ive been tryna call you but you changed your number so ive been keeping my eye on you..” his confession was quiet but it was loud an clear. Weirdly it made your heart skip a beat at his confession. Normal girls would run away gag and be scared or disgusted that they were being “stalked”. But you weren’t normal far from it. You felt your cheeks get hot and listen to billy mumble for  words. “And i just want to be with you. I want to so fucking much y/n”  hearing enough  you pulled him by the shirt standing up and kissing his lips with so much passion and fire he almost fell over. Slowly he kissed you back moving the stool to push you into the counter. 

Your hand went to the back of his neck scratching softly making him groan in response. He pulled your hair to make your mouth open so he could slide his tongue in. You could feel yourself getting wet and your belly make flips. As well as billys hard on. He could hardly take it anymore his jeans becoming to tight. At that moment his hands were touching everywhere. “Fuck i cant take it anymore i need to touch you feel you.. taste you, it’s driving me fucking insane” billy felt like a teenage boy wanting to fuck you right there. He lifted you up and put you on his shoulder dragging you to your room. You laughed at his eagerness with made him slap your ass a few times shutting you up. 

He threw you on the bed and just looked at you. You looked so beautiful  swollen lips and soft red marks on your neck. Your dress rolled above your plush soft thighs. “Your so fucking beautiful y/n” he rasped and kissed you softly while slowly taking off your dress. you moaned when you felt his knee between your legs grinding against it your core soaking his pants because you forgot to wear underwear.” Billy fuck i cant take it any more.. please do something please” you became a pleading mess not even remembering your self anymore while lust clouded your judgement. Billy laughed above you. Finally finished getting you all naked and bare for his eyes to see. You felt a little insecure hiding your self from his hungry eyes. He make a type of growl sound and lifted your wrists above your head. “ tsk tsk, none of that now i want to see all of this body all of it for me and its so fucking gorgeous so stop hiding it” it felt more of a command than a compliment and a whimper came out of you. “ shh Dont worry daddy will take care of you” he hummed while tying your wrist together with the rope of your dress. You would be mad that he ruined your dress but that was for later.

“Billy please just fuck me now i cant take it anymore” he grabbed your throat and bit your lip making it bleed into his mouth. You whined at the pain but it felt so good. “Thats not my name sweetheart, i only pleasure good girls and you haven’t been so good lately” he softly kisses around your nipples almost feathered like to the point you could barley feel it. He was making you angry with all his teasing and he was doing it on purpose and you knew it. “Bill- Daddy fuck i cant take i need you so fucking bad right just look how wet you made me, i cant take it anymore your the only one that can please me~” your voice was soft full of a seductive tone that made Billy’s ears pick up. “Since you asked so nicely ill give it to you, but you have to follow my rules”  he whispered in your ears. You nodded eagerly agreeing to whatever he said.

 He slowly kissed down to your thighs leaving bite marks sometimes along the way making you squirm. He slapped your face making you cry a little while he shook his head. You looked in his eyes catching the warning trying to stay as still as possible. He licked. Down your thighs so close to the place you needed him the most.

You where whining for him to lick there. When he finally did a low moan came from him. “So fucking sweet and all fucking mine.” He grumbled while sucking on your clit and prodding your entrance with his fingers. Moans left your lips he was skillful with his actions hitting spots your fingers couldn’t reach licking you like his life depended on it. You felt like you were in heaven. But you couldn’t keep your thighs open no matter how hard you tried. “Fuck daddy  t’s too much” you kept squirming. “ mmm i know baby but you got to be still daddy can do something for you but it might hurt okay” he was asking for your consent which you gladly agreed to. He pulled a knife from a nearby desk staring up at you. “All you got to do i keep these pretty thighs open and then you wont get cut, ok princess” he whispered in your ear and nibbled slightly. You moaned in response pleasing billy. He slid  down slowly and trace the knife around your nipples. The touch foreign but pleasurable, it felt like a scratch but it didn’t hurt. Slowly he dragged it down to your thighs careful to put light pressure.

When he reached you sweet spot he started his work again giving you beyond pleasure you could imagine. The knife only slightly touching you thigh. Your moans were more than audible and the room was filled with slurp noises. You trued you best to keep you thighs apart and felt your high approaching. “Daddy! Fuck imm gonn-na cum” you almost screamed. Billy moaned in response and continued. Your high washed over you but he never slowed his pace. Making you over sensitive. “Fu- stop it cant take no more” you almost cried. “Just one more baby ok, have to make sure your all prepped and wet” after what seemed like decades you came three times already sore from his torment. He threw the knife aside and came up to kiss you. Your juices still on his lips.  You moaned and kissed him back. He rest his head against yours and pulled your thighs around his waist thrusting all of him into you in one push. His eyes rolled back and a low groan came out making you feel butterfly’s.

“Fuck your so tight, made just for me huh,” he slapped your cheek and harshly thrusted up into you. Making you let out a loud mewl. “All for you, fuck fell ssso good” tears were running down your cheeks. And billy started thrusting into you at a fast pace that hit your sweet spot over and over. He whispered dirty words in your ears and looked down at you. He wrapped his hand around your throat still setting a brutal pace. “Fuck look at me. Mmm want to see me little whore all for me!” He felt you clenched at those words and sped up and moved his fingers to your clit. “You like that huh? Being my little whore” he slapped you and you moaned loudly. “Mmgh yess all your daddy. Your little whore.. gonna cum!!” You started shaking feeling an unfamiliar feeling.

“Its ok cum let me feel your juices” he kissed you as you came feeling a flush if juices come out. “Fuck look at that made you squirt so fucking hot” he groaned and released inside of you. You shared a passionate kiss. Flipping you guys over now you on top.  Still inside you rolled you hips against him. “Fuck you look so pretty like that baby girl” he grabbed your hims and made you move slowly. “Billy ngh, i need to tell you something.” You stared down at hime while you slowly moved up and down bitting your lips. “Ok baby tell me” he leaned up so now your guys were impossibly close while he sucked on your neck leaving marks. You moaned softly. “ im.. im the girl.. who played with you as a child..” you whispers. He immediately looked up at you staring you in the eyes as he pulled you closes thrusting up into you at such a fast pace your nipples bounced in his face. You moaned loudly as he flipped you over kissing you everywhere. Your face scrunched up in pleasure trying to form words. “Shh. I know your her, i knew for a long time but fuck been waiting for you to say it. Ima give you my kids yeah? Were gonna have a fucking happy family ok?” He moaned in your ears and you just nodded in reply.

 “Gonna fill you up now okay?” He started rubbing your clit bringing you over the edge as you saw stars as you both cummed together. He stilled for a moment looking in your eyes. He looked sad and you pulled him in for a hug. “ I’ve done some bad things y/n..” he whispered. 

“So have i billy, but that doesn’t matter ok?”

He hummed in response and gave you a soft kiss.

“I love you y/n… i always will” your heart skipped a beat at the confession and your cried a little. His brow scrunched up in worry. And you softly laughed.

“I love you to billy, and i always will”

You both cuddled and enjoyed each others embrace.

You felt safe a feeling that was hardly recognizable.

But one thing was for sure is that your love for each-other was a burning passion with a touch of fire.

[mamashenanigans]

Alrighty guys. It’s time once again for me to discuss AFO and his “feelings”.

First and foremost: it’s quite disappointing how many fans discount anything to do with AFO. There’s some unbridled anger that seems to be derived from a love for another character(often Tomura/Tenko) which is a shame because these people are missing out on some amazing context clues, possibly on purpose, because they don’t want to acknowledge the possibility that AFO isn’t a one dimensional villain.

At the beginning of MHA, the same could be said of All Might. He seemed to just be a one dimensional hero until we started to get his backstory. That’s when he became relatable and no longer just All Might, but Yagi Toshinori. AFO is supposed to be his antithesis, so it would actually be strange if AFO didn’t have something that made him relatable as well. For All Might, it was a student teacher bond and the experience of him having lived a life as a Quirkless individual(like Deku).

AFO is evil, but how does one become evil? Is an individual born that way or does circumstance cause them to embrace something that is considered evil by everyone else. Prime AFO(the now regenerated original AFO) has spoken briefly about why he does things and it seems to point in that sort of direction.

In the flashbacks to AFO and Yoichi, AFO makes excuses for his actions as bringing “order”, an obsession reiterated by TomurAFO. When speaking to his brother, AFO never states he is evil. He even makes it clear that what his followers have done wasn’t by his own hands, so there is no blood on them. Obviously, we know that isn’t really true, but the man is trying really hard to make his brother, and perhaps himself, believe it is true. What’s interesting is that AFO has embraced the title of “evil” in the present time. What changed between the past and now? Hmm….

With the excellent flashback Hori gave us in the last issue, we are presented with a sad AFO. So much so, that the tears don’t stop even while he kills the 2nd user. Just through art, there’s a fury there. One so deep, that AFO is eerily calm. The most dangerous he could be. Why is he crying? It’s fairly obvious: the only thing that could invoke such an emotion in the “Demon King” would be the death of his brother. Though long ago now in terms of the MHA manga, the one time we get a hint of humanity from AFO is when he states that he loves Yoichi. A being like him loving anything is already quite a feat and, of course, there’s been both outer and inner dialogue concerning his brother ever since. AFO considers OFA itself as “little brother” and his obsession with taking it back means a lot in the story.

This is because, for a villain that wants to rule the world, the only power that could counter him is OFA. However…he’s obviously allowed every prior OFA user to transfer the power, even though he killed them all(except the 4th if I remember correctly). We can theorize that he may not have known very early on with 2nd and 3rd and even 4th that what is left of Yoichi resides within the power, but he attempted to take the power from Banjo and En. It is those interactions that seems to have propelled him to the ultimate plan of molding a body with hate so strong he can overpower OFA’s will. AFO allowed the users to give the power away before killing them as doing so otherwise would “kill” what was left of Yoichi. It would be incredibly easy to just kill these users WITH OFA still a part of them as that would take away the ultimate threat to his desires. But we know there’s another, deeper desire: AFO wants Yoichi.

Now, let us again reference Darth Vader, the character that is obviously, in some ways, an inspiration for AFO.

Darth Vader was considered the ultimate, badass villain ever…before the end of Empire Strikes Back. Fanzine fanfics, fandom talk, and etc, in the early days of Star Wars shows this. However, Empire Strikes Back does something many regular viewers miss: the mannerisms of Vader, as much of his emotion is derived from body language, shows the viewer that there is much more behind the mask. After revealing Luke’s parentage, his son is able to escape, even with all of Vader’s plans in place. With the Falcon escaping, Vader attempts to reach his son through the force and his words hold a weight that fans at the time may have been confused by. There’s a want there. He is desperate. He’s begging. After the Falcon hits light speed and escapes, Vader’s mannerisms in front of the window of the Executor speaks more volume than words: he can’t believe it. He lost the only thing he has left of a wife he loved so much he gave up his humanity. He turns away then back. Then we have Admiral Piett, expecting to be force choked out of existence, but Vader’s sadness causes him to not even care. It is this introduction of emotion from an otherwise terrifying villain that started to cause the fandom to rethink this character. Mind you, there was nothing else besides this other than the novelizations.

Little things like mannerisms can mean a lot in the long run for villains. With AFO, we are shown his tears, the crying purposefully highlighted by Hori reversing the usual shadowing of AFO’s eyes to shadowing the lower half of his face instead. Hori wants you to concentrate on AFO’s eyes. He wants you to internalize AFO’s tears. They matter.

Now, harking back to my statement about what “makes someone evil”: Vader fell to the Dark Side because he wanted to save someone he loves. This love transformed into obsession and possession as he continued down the black hole of the Dark Side. Anakin was already about Order, but it became an obsession as Order would mean that he had CONTROL over everything around him, something a once slave boy would need in order to mentally survive. The Jedi Order gave him that, for a time, before he became jaded as the love he felt for his wife was considered abhorrent.

So, was AFO’s idea of Order and desire to rule just a whim? Or did he experience an insane upheaval of humanity when Quirks manifested? There was no Order and it probably affected the brothers as they tried to survive in a world turned upside down. Although there is obviously selfishness behind it(same as with Anakin), AFO still tries to rationalize his reasoning as being a means to create Order in the world. However, his brother knows him intimately, as a family member, and can parse through his brother’s words. For someone that probably made Order an excuse for all his actions, this would be quite annoying for AFO.

But why does he readily call himself evil now? Because “good”, because “heroes”, were why Yoichi died. The idealism of them already turned Yoichi against him with what he considers foolish, but it was also vigilantes, heroes in their day, that took Yoichi away from him and filled his head with more idealism. It probably caused Yoichi’s death. With tears presented as such, we can easily accept that Yoichi’s death was not purposeful, but probably a, what AFO considers, symptom of this heroic idealism. So what is one to do when they believe this is why their loved one died? Especially if they can’t accept the fact that their own decisions caused the death in the first place? Blame the heroes. And what is the opposite of the hero? The villain. AFO takes on the mantle of evil, not because he just wants to be evil, but because it’s the opposite of the ideals that caused his brother’s death.

I’m hopeful, especially with this flashback, that we’ll get more of the brothers’ backstory and also a better understanding of why AFO became the Symbol of Evil he is now. I feel that revealing it and examining it would fit more with the messages of MHA than the usual Shonen fair we’re used to.

Thank you for coming to my TEDtalk.

EDIT: In case people missed my post about it…I often do theory dumping when I’ve had a “bit” to drink. So, yeah, you are partly reading the drunken thoughts of a nerdy person.

[cripplecharacters]

What would be your most general suggestions in order to write a character with intellectual disability respectfully and accurately? It’s hard to find many first hand accounts of people with IDs writing about what they’d like to see in these characters.

Hi, thanks for your question!

I will try to give a few general dos and don’ts on how to make an ID character - the question is vague so I won't be too specific but I hope you find something here helpful! First of all: please keep in mind that ID people are very different from each other in both personality and how exactly their disability impacts them. Some people won't be able to perform any ADLs (short for activities of daily living; things like bathing, dressing, using the bathroom or eating by yourself), some will be able to do all of them and a lot will be somewhere in-between. That makes it more complicated to figure out what is accurate and what not because it just varies greatly between people. Even people similar ability levels can be completely different - they can have different verbality levels, different physical conditions, some of them could be very stubborn while others could be the complete opposite and give up very fast, you get the picture.

What to do while writing:

Seems very obvious but make sure they're an actual character and not just their disability - give them a personality, relationships, hobby etc.

Portray the common signs of ID - a lot of us struggle with things like planning (especially long-term), organizing, abstract reasoning, problem-solving or are just slower with understanding/doing things in general. It's fine for your character to need help and ask for help with those things! They don't need to compensate for it with savant-like abilities or some amazing feats, it's ok for them to just be a regular person who struggles in some or most areas and gets adequate help so they can function better.

A lot of people with ID struggle with understanding language that isn't clear or simplified. Very elaborate sentence structure or weird wording can make it hard or impossible for your character to correctly understand what is spoken to them so if you want your characters to communicate properly they should probably use more clear speech. That doesn't mean babytalk or only giving them the bare minimum - try looking at this simplified version of this article to get an idea of what I mean (both links lead to Wikipedia). Simpler sentence structure and more common words make things more accessible.

Give your character agency over their identity and feelings. We can struggle with understanding things, but it doesn't mean we can't be gay, trans or any other LGBTQ+ identity and it's not fair to question our ability to do so. A person with ID should be able to decide about things regarding themself. Even if your character requires 24/7 care, they (ideally) should be able to have a say in who will be their caregiver, for example.

Getting someone's high needs met is not infantilization, it's just care. A character that needs help with bathing themself isn't "bad representation" or being treated like a child just because of it.

Make sure you look up how ID works medically so you don't commit any basic medical misinformation (like having it start in adulthood). Specifically look out to not confuse brain injury symptoms with ID. ID also doesn't directly affect someone's life expectancy on its own.

Connected to the last point, but you might want to try and decide on the cause of why the character has ID just because it will probably make your job as a writer a bit easier with figuring out what specific symptoms they might be experiencing. Someone who has ID because they went through severe meningitis as a little child might have different symptoms than someone born with Rett Syndrome. There are a lot of conditions that cause ID, but the most common are Down Syndrome, FASD and Fragile X Syndrome.

Try to remember: people with intellectual disability can be anyone and be anywhere! You can write a sarcastic autistic princess with ID, a loud love interest with Angelman Syndrome or a shy goth classmate with CRS and none of these would be “forced”.

What to NOT do:

Avoid the “always happy” character trope (goes double or even triple for characters with Down Syndrome because that's where it's the most prevalent). This one is a real issue with how people see real life intellectually disabled people. A character with ID should be allowed to have a full range of emotions just like everyone else.

Don't use the mental age theory - it's an ableist and harmful concept that claims that people with ID are mentally X years old (X never being their actual age). A 40-year-old character who can't eat or bathe by themself is 40 years old, not 3.

Avoid having your character compensate for their ID with some specific type of intelligence ("they're not booksmart but they have high emotional intelligence!) because that's neither how this works or what is helpful when it comes to representation. Your character shouldn't have to be smart "in some way" to be treated with respect.

Don't make your character extremely violent or brutal, especially if they're also unaware of what they're doing (basically don't make your character Lennie from of Mice and Men). I feel like this one is mostly about the impact on how some people see ID people (especially ID men of color) by painting them as inherently violent which is not true. That's not to say your character can't get into a fight but just try to be aware of this trope, especially if your character is marginalized in other ways as well.

Most people who seek any advice regarding writing disabled characters will probably know that using the r-slur is a big no, but words like moron, imbecile, feeble-minded or idiot also come directly from outdated medical terminology regarding intellectual disability. Personally, I'm very much against using them without acknowledging their origin and they can be genuinely upsetting to read.

Sorry it came out so long! I tried to put together both very basic advice and some more complex points so hopefully as much people as possible can take something away from this. If you have any more specific questions feel free to send another ask. good luck with your writing ❤️ (heart emoji)

mod sasza

[merrivia]

I don’t want to start drama and I don’t think Damen raped Laurent but like… Damens been raping sex slaves since he was thirteen lol like they were slaves and could not consent, ergo: rape. That Damen/Akielos didn’t think of it that way and that Damen would be horrified by such an accusation doesn’t mean we in the modern world shouldn’t recognize it as rape. I do love Damen as a character for what it’s worth but yeah. Def a rapist. As is Laurent, for that matter, who I also love.

Hmm are you sure you don't want to create drama lol.

Okay so this is touching on some very emotive topics.

All I'm going to say is yep, absolutely. Laurent and Damen are morally grey characters by today's legal standards and moral values. They inflict grievous bodily harm, and they kill. Both of them leave victims in their wake.

Readings of this text can be done in multiple ways, and the fact that it is basically original slash fiction that was meant to be 'slavefic' and explore that as a kink, meant once it moved to traditional publishing and came outside of that particular context, the content was always going to be problematic. I do think Pacat pulls off an extraordinary feat by turning something originally meant to be sexy and a kink exploration, into something with such meaningful, complex characterisation

I want to throw something out there, about legal definitions of crime, in terms of the rape in the novel. There are two aspects: 'actus reus' which translates as the act of committing the crime, and 'mens rea' which is the intention to commit the crime. You need both to convict someone. In the UK, where I was born and brought up, consent relates to both- so as soon as you commit the act of raping someone without consent, you also have the 'mens rea' of intention.

Now under that definition, yep, you would call Laurent and Damen rapists. No arguments from me there.

If you did want to delve a little deeper, this is what I would say:-

Essentially, both Laurent and Damen absolutely commit actus reus, in terms of rape, Damen by having sex with slaves and Laurent by what he does when he drugs Damen and tries to have Govart rape him in the ring, and when he forces Damen to undergo fellatio by Ancel (under UK law, 'causing someone to have sexual activity' is also a sexual offence, I'm actually not sure if it would be seen as rape, but in my eyes it is). Laurent most definitely also has the 'mens rea', he did those things with the intent that Damen be raped and sexually assaulted.

Damen, I do feel is more complicated, because I think it can be successfully argued that he had the 'actus reus' but not the 'mens rea'. You can feel free to disagree with me on this. Your reading of the text is your own. This is fiction and not real life. The world of the books is not our world.

Damen has had 'kinghood' hammered into him since a child. Think of what Akielon thinking is like around that: Be the perfect warrior. Be the perfect man. Be virile. Take slaves as it is a source of 'extreme pride' to your people. Slaves are trained to be submissive, they crave a master, they submit and you treat them perfectly. That is the trade off, and it is honourable.

Damen didn't actually see slaves as people, in the same way that he would literally anyone else in society. It's horrific, no doubt about that. But Damen has never ever questioned or critiqued his culture, as slavery is ingrained into every part of it. That would also go against what his father Theomedes believed in too, and Damen was raised to be obedient to him, and lived his life striving to please his father completely. Damen treated his slaves perfectly, so he thought, and he thought of that as part of his moral duty. You can see that Damen literally risks so much to ensure the safety of the consignment of slaves at Arles. He also sees what Govart did to Erasmus as rape (which it was), and is filled with righteous anger and outrage over it. This all tells us a lot about his world view.

Remember that Damen as a prince is literally 'exalted', considered on a higher level to normal people, so much so that his body servants in KR cannot dress him without extreme nervousness as the intimacy of touching his body is too disrespectful ('death to lay hands on the son of the king'). Slaves can do it, as they are literally so submissive that they will do anything they are ordered to. It angers and displeases the Akielons in KR, that Damen refuses slaves, and he still soldiers on regardless. I would wager, in terms of his upbringing Damen would be pretty touch-starved if it weren't for slaves (and wrestling!) because he literally is not supposed to be touched! Imagine the head-fuck of having that as your normal way of being (it's also why, alongside notions of Akeilon masculinity, I don't think he was hugged for most of his life, until Laurent in ch 12 of KR). To sum up: Damen has no conception in terms of his world view that what he's doing to slaves is rape, therefore his 'mens rea' is, arguably, actually not there. When Laurent accuses him of being a rapist, he visibly recoils in horror, as that's simply not something he thinks he would ever do.

As soon as Damen experiences the true horrors of slavery for himself, he understands slaves are human beings, something he didn't really get before, and he becomes an abolitionist. He refuses to have sex with them, as now he knows it’s rape, and won't even be served by them. It isn't just that Damen is in love with Laurent, and doesn't want to have sex with anyone but him. He has changed his own world view, by being on the other side of the fence, in a country that was not his own, but also of his own volition and now has the ability to make the right choices.

So, whether you see him as a rapist or not, is entirely up to you. But people are going to read his actions differently when it comes to his 'mens rea', and I think that's something that has to be accepted as part of fandom discourse. I also find it interesting, that for some reason, Laurent's actions which so much more clearly had the intent of inflicting sexual acts by force, are seen as secondary to Damen's apparently. Make of that what you will 🌚

[enderspawn]

theres this fic idea i’ve been thinking of for a long while now (honestly i've had this specific post drafted since may of this year, so maybe since january or so) and want to eventually write one day, but if im being honesty with myself i'm not sure if i ever will, so im at least putting it out there now.

its a chip analysis piece (likely in some kind of 5+1 format, primarily from jay’s POV) specifically between chip and his relationship with food. the simple fact he’s always been this scrawny malnourished street kid when growing up outside of the black rose means a lot to me, and it would likely cause a lot of habits or behaviors the others wouldnt have or possibly even understand to begin with which would be a fun thing to explore and how it can reveal more abt him.

scenes/topics that would be Covered will be under cut

1 ---

the first thing that immediately comes to mind is an analysis and expansion upon his canon interactions with food in canon, such as the bag of chip’s jay gives him on loffinlot or the cinnamon roll incident

for one, the fact that jay carries snacks at all is kind of indicative and would likely be the focus. use jay's pov to explain how she’s learned to bring snacks on adventures since teaming with chip (likely with comments being somewhat snide or huffy about it, or comparing him to a child demanding/needing a snack, since they are still kind of strangers and she doesn’t know much about chip).

(if desired, it could also expand on how he fuckin’ made that small bag of chips last so long. yes the true answer is “because it was funny” but like… rationing behavior? jay might make an absent note of it (due to her observant feat), but wouldn’t likely extrapolate further at the time. also may be cut entirely for messing with story flow too much to include as a detail.)

the cinnamon roll scene is… listen he literally tried to share food with someone and broke down crying doing so because he loves them and wants to share that. obvious example of using food as a language for love and appreciation (which, again, takes on another level when you remember he comes from a food-scarce background). like thats just a thing that happened i don’t care if it was a goof that’s just canon. bite me. 

2 ---

observation of chip having "weird" behaviors with food. these include having a seemingly massive appetite and being sure to always clean his plate (you don’t turn down access to food and you take what you can in case you can’t do it again soon.) 

but also: as part of chip kind of projecting onto ollie, he’s always trying to pawn more food onto ollie’s plate. sometimes it’s as subtle as saying he’s “not hungry anymore” and scrapping whats left to ollie (which would catch jay’s eye because previously he’s always finished his plate even when full and clues her in) to as obvious as literally giving him more and saying he needs to eat more.

both the above points would be stuff jay would 1. spot and 2. actually take note of/care about, around after desire island or so. 

3 ---

immediately after leaving allport, i think seeing reuben would bring back a bunch of chip's old habits and cause him to backslide a bit. after all, even if they were a “family”, they were also still a gang of street rats. on instinct, he would end up showing a lot of food guarding habits (being overly protective of people taking it, hiding food in a stash, etc). he likely also had these habits for a while after joining with jay and gillion, but after episode 16 when they started slowly getting closer the habits faded because he knew he could trust them. 

4 ---

this is such a minor point in comparison to the rest of this list but i can see it so clearly in my brain. chip has an apple (likely stolen tbh) and he takes a bite out of it and leans against a wall. jay either makes a snide comment towards him about it or just snorts or something, prompting chip to hold it up towards her and go “you want some?” in a snarky way (speaking with his mouth full all the while).

jay rolls her eyes and says yes and gets startled when chip actually throws her the apple. she yelps, catching it, then throws it back immediately while yelling something like “ew, no, you took a bite of it already! i was kidding! gross!” chip feigns being wounded and retorts with something like “and here i was willing to expose myself to your stink getting on my apple–” and cue bickering between them about cooties. 

he just straight up was willing to share the apple, thoughts abt "the fact he already bit into it" don’t register for him bc its such a non-issue in his mind. he offers to share about any food he has/makes because its a silent way to show he cares. i don’t think he’s fully conscious of that fact though. in general i think chip responds a lot better to subtle actions showing love than words of love and this is just another example of that from him

(following this is likely where cinnamon roll scene would go in the fic, both timeline-wise and thematically, since this section is focused more or less on "sharing your food as a sign of love")

5 ---

this next section would be the most plot heavy or traditional “fic” affair, in that it’s not solely fluff padding/analysis and has some original storybits.

the crew would be stranded on an island. i don’t know how exactly, but the key parts is that they don’t have their ship, there’s no one else on the island, and they have limited resources/rations. presumably they know rescue is coming, but ideally they don’t know exactly when (for drama purposes, as well as to make proper rationing out supplies p much impossible). perhaps the grandberry crew is on their way to save them, but they ended up on this island after a storm and don’t know where they are to point the grandberry pirates to. something like that.

actually, this plays out very similarly to the ollie part as detailed earlier, but to the left. as the crew starts to struggle with rations, chip would start (subtly when possible) start giving up his own portions. either by feigning lack of appetite, persuasion, deception, etc. the closest he comes to stating the truth would be when someone (likely ollie) asks if he’ll be okay going without his portion and chip shrugs then leans back on his elbows with a smirk and goes “nah, i’m used to it anyway.”

this is when the rest of the crew also starts to pick up on chip’s behaviors, to the point it becomes a bit of an unspoken secret they don’t want to dig into. previously, and the reason the entire fic is from Jay's POV, shes been the only one observant enough to take notice off all these traits. this is when it becomes So obvious everyone notices it.

6 ---

preferably, near the beginning of the story (likely after the chip bag incident, but before jay starts noticing all of chip’s behaviors, so that she cares for him more than she’s annoyed by him but hasn't put together any real dots-- between section 1 and 2), there would be a section where chip is mocked for his short height (as the shortest of the crew, at around 5’4) and being VERY easy for gillion to carry. 

then, after the island section (section 5), there would be another part where chip’s height and weight are commented on. i'm undecided if this would be another light hearted goof scene or a more “dramatic” serious scene (which if it was it would likely be tied to the island incident. maybe an injury or argument or something?).

either way, it happens because jay ends up lifting/carrying chip. jay “8 in strength” ferin. he’s just fuckin light. afterwards, chip would explain saying something like “its not my fault! cause like– outside of arlin, i was kind of a street rat growing up, yknow? they arent particularly known for having a stable food situation, didn’t get all the nutrients and junk you need to grow tall”. it starts as a joke and a kind of light-hearted ribbing defense, but kind of sobers up in that melancholic-nostalgic way by the end.

it’s the first time he directly states anything abt his upbringing and food to his crew, but its a confirmation. well, its a confirmation for jay. everyone else definitely knew something was going on, but jay is the one who is able to connect all the pieces bc she’s the only one whos noticed all the other pieces. she gets the Whole Picture of how his childhood and upbringing caused all these behaviors and kind of what they imply abt chip's behavior now (like the food sharing as love, smothering ollie, etc)

+ 1 ---

for a cheesy ending bonus, have jay use a mix of chip’s anecdotes abt the black rose and drey’s shaky memory to try and cook up a meal he used to have there. (for bonus, if desired she could reach out to lizzie too since lizzie lived with the old chef shay).

depending on author preference, either its good and chip cries because of the ~*memories*~ and the fact they cared enough, or it’s comically awful and not much at all like the original but the sole fact that they went out of their way to very obviously try SO hard to surprise him with this because they thought it would make him happy (as well as trying to speak to him in his own love language) makes him cry about it anyway. 

(again, chip responds better to acts of love than words-- having his crew not only notice this abt him, but then do something to try and show that love hits him way harder than anything else could)

[grailfinders]

Grailfinders Viewers' Choice #16: Richard the Lionheart

Today on Grailfinders, we’re building the crusader king of Fate/Strange Fake, Richard the first, a.k.a. Richard the Lionheart. Richie rich is a Champion like Artoria, since he needs to be able to almost copy her noble phantasm, but he also dips into Cleric to summon his knights, Fighter for some extra swordplay skillz, as well as the Duelist Archetype to draw whatever he wields quickly and effectively.

check out his build breakdown below the cut, or his character sheet over here!

Ancestry & Background

okay, okay, no funny business with ancestries this time. Richard the first is a bonified Skilled Human, even if he has blue blood. with this, he gets a boost in any two stats like Strength and Charisma, and he gets his riding skill early thanks to a free training in Nature, which also gets bumped up for free at level 5. beyond that, his Natural Skill gives him training in two more skills of your choice like Diplomacy and Athletics. Richard’s kind of good at everything, so expect a lot of spread.

at level five, Richard can Sense Allies within 60’ of you as long as they’re not hiding from you. you won’t know exactly where they are, but finding them is also a lot easier.

at level nine you become Multitalented, which is where that Fighter dedication I mentioned earlier came from. by that point you’re proficient in both athletics and acrobatics, so you learn Deception instead.

at level 13 your Advanced General Training gives you another general feat of level 7 or lower. if there’s something you really want by this point feel free to grab it, but I’m saying it’s for Powerful Leap. it feels like every servant can hop around like a frog on crack.

finally at level 17 your Heroic Presence bolsters nearby allies with zealous conviction. they get temporary HP, a bonus against mental effects, and you can make them do whatever you want, as long as it doesn’t clash with their morals too badly.

of course your background is a Noble, giving you a boost in Intelligence and Constitution, as well as training in Society and Heraldry Lore, and on top of that, you gain Courtly Graces, allowing you to use society to make an impression on other nobles.

Class Levels

1. getting the proficiencies out of the way, on top of the ones already mentioned you’re trained in Perception, Religion, Reflex saves, your Class DC, Unarmed, Simple, and Martial Weapons, all Armor, Survival, and Stealth immediately, and you learn Intimidation, Medicine, Performance, and Thievery as you get smarter. that last one might not sound kingly, but you have to remember he was british first. he’s also an expert in Fortitude and Will saves.

as for the actual fun stuff, your Key Ability is Strength, and you start off with an Ability Boost in Strength, Dexterity, Wisdom, and Charisma. you also take on your deity’s domain, Family. I can’t really justify that domain flavor-wise, but mechanically you keep your allies buffed, and family is great at that. your Soothing Words are a devotion spell you can cast once per day, or you can recharge it by spending some time doing good deeds and the like. with it, you can give an ally a +1 bonus to all will saves, plus an additional +1 against emotion effects, for a round. this can also counteract a current emotional effect on that target.

as a Paladin, you have to follow the Tenets of Good, which don’t do too much mechanically but bind you flavor-wise to the side of justice and all that nonsense. this gives you the Lay on Hands devotion spell as well as a second devotion casting per day, and you can make a Retributive Strike as a reaction. this simultaneously gives an ally getting hit resistance to the attack’s damage and allows you to get a hit in on whoever caused it if they’re in range.

you also get trained in another skill here for some reason, so grab Crafting, why not. you’re also trained in Divine Spells, though it doesn’t matter much for our build.

finally, you can Shield Block, if you ever feel like carrying one of those around.

2. at your second level you can take a Vengeful Oath against evil creatures, binding you to defeating them if there’s a good chance of success. you did fight the king of england before becoming him. die a hero or become a villain and all that. this allows you to lay on hands on enemies who have hurt innocents or good allies as if they were undead, causing it to deal damage instead of healing it. it’ll be a while until your sword is properly set up. so this will have to do for now.

you’re also popular enough to have the Eyes of the City on your target, allowing you to use diplomacy and society to track creatures in towns and villages.

you also get the duelist dedication this level since you’re not wise enough to be a cleric yet. for now, that means you can quick draw as an action, drawing and attacking in the same move.

3. at level three you can stick a Divine Ally in your blade, allowing you to add a free property rune to one of your weapons at the start of your day. you can pick between disrupting (good against undead), ghost touch (its in the name), returning (if you like throwing stuff), or shifting (if you’re indecisive). you also get the critical specialization of that weapon, which for a sword means the target becomes flat footed for a round. that being said you can technically turn any weapon into your “Excalibur”, so feel free to… branch out.

speaking of diversifying, your Untrained Improvisation lets you add half your level to untrained skill checks, so you can do a lot more than you’d think. you’re also better in Athletics.

4. at level four your Aura of Courage can buff up your allies and keep them from being frightened. when that happens, the condition value is reduced, and you also reduce the frightened value of nearby allies at the end of your turn.

while we’re not going as hard in the paint for a horse as we did with some of the riders, sabers still have that Bonded Animal we gotta get, so now you can spend seven days with a regular animal, and if you pass a nature check they’ll bond with you and become permanently helpful, unless you fuck it up.

you can also only have one bonded animal at a time. can’t have a repeat of your last campaign, right?

finally, you can issue a Duelist’s Challenge as an action, turning one enemy into your dueling opponent. until they are defeated, they run away, or the encounter ends, any one-handed attack you hit them with deals extra damage, at the cost of you dealing less damage to other creatures. that’s why you have to learn delegation. not yet though.

5. at level five your Ability Boost boosts your Dexterity, Constitution, Intelligence, and Wisdom. you’re also better at Diplomacy now, go wild. finally, your Weapon Expertise makes you an expert in most kinds of weapons.

6. At level six, you can Smite Evil by spending an action to deal extra damage against a particular evil foe. if that foe attacks one of your allies, the duration of this effect continues into their next turn, ad infinitum.

You may also Glad-Hand new allies by making an impression on them immediately at a small penalty. If you fail, you can still try again with your normal impression roll after a minute of conversation.

Finally, you can use your Dueling Parry as an action to give yourself more AC while wielding a one-handed weapon.

7. At level seven your Armor Expertise will protect you just a bit more, and you’ll also gain the specialization effects of medium and heavy armor.

While we still haven’t been able to summon your knights yet, you can at least be sure your minions are doing a good job if you’re a Hireling Manager, giving all your hirelings a +2 bonus to all skill checks.

We’ll also increase your proficiency with Religion while we’re here, and give you a Weapon Specialization for extra damage with weapons you’re more proficient with.

8. at level eight your Advanced Deity’s Domain lets you teach your knights some Unity, giving you a third devotion point and letting you use your reaction so each ally within 30’ of you can choose between using their own saving throw modifier or yours. paladins have pretty good magic defense, so yours is usually the better option.

you can also Rapid Mantel now to climb easier. this level’s a bit slow, aside from the new spell.

just kidding, because now you’re a Cleric thanks to your new dedication! since you’re already “trained” in “religion” and all that, you get proficiency in Acrobatics and Arcana instead. you learn a couple cantrips now, but to be honest we’re entirely just here for the summons.

9. level nine is actually pretty slow. you get Champion Expertise to help you defend your pokemon title easier, as well as a Divine Smite to deal damage over time to whoever you hit with your retribution.

you’re also now better at Fortitude and Reflex saves, as well as Religion.

10. at level 10 you get another Ability Boost in Strength, Constitution, Wisdom, and Charisma.

Excalibur gets a little more shiny this level thanks to your Radiant Blade Spirit giving you more options to pick from for your weapon runes. now you’ve unlocked flaming, which deals persistent damage; and Axiomatic , which deals extra damage against chaotic enemies. you also don’t have to roll damage when you score a critical hit either, just take the average damage for each die. (you technically get the Holy rune as well to fit Pathfinder Richard, but Fate Richard is actually lawful neutral, so I’m leaving it off the list. no not that Lawful Neutral.)

you can also say a Battle Prayer as an action, dealing damage of your alignment to an enemy of your choice. it’s not massive, and you can only use this once per day per enemy, but the damage triples when you become legendary in religion, so that’s cool.

you also learn Basic Cleric Spellcasting, which doesn’t get you the slots needed to summon celestials yet. baby steps. if you really want something to do here, you could pick up Animate Dead, if you don’t mind your Richard being a lot creepier than the original. Maybe this is the FGO arcade Richard? anyway, the base version of the spell doesn’t do much, but for your second level slot you can summon a Skeletal Soldier, so that’s pretty knight-ish.

11. at level 11, your Alertness and Divine Will increases the proficiency of your Perception and Will saves respectively, and you can choose to Exalt your allies when you make a retributive strike, getting them in on the fun. since you kind of always have Excalibur on you, you’ll need some Incredible Investiture to free up some attunement slots.

you’re also better at Heraldry Lore now. why not?

12. at level 12 Excalibur becomes a Blade of Justice, letting you spend two actions to smite an enemy who’s attacked an ally or innocent before. the attack deals extra damage against the evil, and regardless of their typing you can turn all that damage into good. as a paladin, you can also add to it any and all effects you’d normally get from your paladin reaction to boot!

if you’d rather play on defense, you can gain a Sacred Defense once per hour by making a rather high religion check. if you succeed, you gain temporary HP for a minute.

you also get Expert Cleric Spellcasting this level, so you’ve got high enough spell slots to Summon Celestials! pretty much anything with “Archon” in the name (aside from a Lantern Archon) can make for a good stand-in. You could also use Summon Axiom if you want to stick more on the lawful flavoring side of things, but almost everything from there is either a demon or something you can get from the Celestial list.

13. your next level’s a bit of a cooldown as usual, it’s mostly just getting better at what you already know: Armor and Weapon Mastery, plus a boost in Intimidation. is it the army of angels? I bet it’s the army of angels.

14. at level 14 you get the only reason we took a vengeful oath at all, the Aura of Vengeance. now when you call on your allies to gang up on something thanks to your Retributive Strike, they take less of a penalty for following your lead. considering how much of this build is about helping the party, this is right in line.

what’s not is letting you Consult the Spirits. though when you think about it, the grail grants you information about where the war is taking place, and the grail is pretty much one big spirit, right? yeah, that’s what we’re going with here.

you’ve also got your fighter archetype from your ancestry now, so let’s pick up the United Assault. it’s a flourish attack that lets you make a strike with a damage bonus for each other creature that’s hit it since its last turn. since you can use your gang-up command at will, this will almost always be a +4 bonus.

15. we’re now ¾ through this build, so you know what that means! that’s right, it’s another Ability Boost! this time, grab some Strength, Constitution, Intelligence, and Charisma.

you also have A Home in Every Port, mostly thanks to you waging war-sized tantrums about the fact that you didn’t before. yeah we’re truly on the cutting edge of political theory here on Grailfinders: “The Crusades: Not That Great”.

anyways, you’ve got a Greater Weapon Specialization for more damage with everything you’re good with, and speaking of being good with stuff, more Intimidation, go nuts.

16. at level sixteen you can stop all that painful thinking and become an Instrument of Zeal- whenever you crit with your retributive strike, you deal an extra die of damage and take away the target’s next action.

you can also force your foes to beat a Terrified Retreat for a round if you critically demoralize ones that are lower-level than you.

finally, if you ever do find a shield now you can form a Shield Wall with your knights. with this, you can spend a reaction when you and another ally have your shield up to give the two of you cover.

17. at level 17, your Champion Mastery makes you a master in, yes, champion-ing. you also get Legendary Armor and a boost in Religion. still not sure if crusaders are good at this whole “religion” thing, but boy howdy are they enthusiastic.

18. at level 18 you can Expand Aura for a round, doubling the length of one of your auras. you can only have one doubled at a time so you’ll have to choose between your aura of courage or vengeance.

you’ve also been in the field long enough to make an Assured Identification. even if you get something wrong, it won’t be disastrous.

finally, your Master Cleric Spellcasting lets you upcast your summons! you get a seventh level slot now, and an eighth level slot at level 20.

19. for our penultimate level, you can Quick Climb since I’m running out of stuff to give you. you also gain the Hero’s Defiance devotion spell, so now you have a guts! finally, bump up your Athletics so you can quick climb in the first place.

20. for your final level, Ability Boost your Strength, Dexterity, Intelligence, and Wisdom. you also gain your third and final aura, the Aura of Unbreakable Virtue. with this, all evil creatures get a -1 penalty to all checks and DCs against your allies, or they get a -2 if they fall under your Oath of Vengeance.

you’re also religious enough to receive Divine Guidance, allowing you to spend 10 minutes reading the bible to get an answer to all of life’s problems if you pass a religion check.

finally, we pick up an advanced maneuver from the fighter archetype so you can Cut from the Air any ranged attacks coming your way. I’ll be honest I haven’t read Fate/Strange Fake, blame Nasu for never localizing anything, so everything I know comes from the wiki. so this is the only thing I know with 100% certainty Richard actually does in the book, everything else was interpolated from his skill descriptions. though tbf that’s how most of my builds work anyway.

oh right the actual mechanics of the feat: you get a +4 AC bonus against a ranged attack by spending your reaction slapping it out of the sky.

Pros & Cons

Pros:

I think I may have ended up making Richard’s Excalibur stronger than Artoria’s actually, especially if we count the damage caused by everyone else getting a hit in on a regular basis. Artoria’s got you beat on range though.

he’s really supportive of the party, protecting them from mind control and saving them from attacks. plus he literally brings the party with him thanks to summons!

thanks to being at least trained in almost everything, your skills can really pay the bills, giving you plenty of options outside of combat.

Cons:

while being a paladin can make you great at defeating evil, your tenets mean you have to defeat whatever evil you come across if you think you can handle it. great for your DM’s plot, terrible for actually living that long. most champions at least only have to worry about dragons, or undead, but you just picked anything evil, so good luck with that!

your exalted retributive strike eats up the whole party’s reactions. you’d better hope you don’t need anything counterspelled in the next round if you plan on going all out. also, as I found out 90% of the way through this build, summons don’t get reactionsat all, so your knights can’t actually fight with you as well as they should.

Yeah, let’s bring up range again. while you certainly have options if you’re willing to play fast and loose with the character thanks to smart summoning or using other cleric spells, those will run out real damn fast, leaving you with very little to fight flying enemies with. thank goodness you’re not a dragon slayer.

[rocketturtle4]

On Repeat tag game

In the unlikely event anyone saw the original version of this post that was up for 12 minutes before I realised I'd done it wrong and panic-deleted it only to realise 12 seconds later that no one would KNOW I'd done it wrong...

...no you didn't

It's Friday evening, I'm blaming weekend brain.

ANYWAY

Tagged by @visualtaehyun @sorry-bonebag and @thegalwhorants I feel so popular! Thankyou!✨

The game: Put your Spotify On Repeat playlist on shuffle and post the first 10 songs! (don't forget the shuffle like I definitely didn't)

Let's see what happens, I was very relieved to realise this is like RECENT on repeats lol, if it had been for the whole year...who knows what would have appeared. My music get's updated very rarely but recent joining of a spotify blend has dragged my music tastes kicking and screaming towards a little bit of variance lol.

Also this On Repeat thing is very cool so TY for the new feature!

Unsteady by X Ambassadors

ahhh what an opener. As some of you may know my bestie @plantsarepeopletoo has been breaking down the Only Friends music on the regular (it's so interesting, the music is almost predictive of the character arcs!!) and occasionally sharing the feeeeeels with me and @shouldiusemyname as they work through it. As part of this we have regularly discussed other songs that remind us of different characters and relationships in OF and this song put me deeeep in my Ray feels after Ep...5? or maybe 6 and yep I've been playing it A LOT ever since.

2. Mad love - Sped Up Version by Mabel, Speed Radio

I don't even remember how I found this one but it's a vibe

3. SPARK by A.C.E

Ooooh interesting, I recently finished a rewatch of Light On Me where I was reminded how much I love the ending song hence this!

4. Don't Blame Me by Taylor Swift

I'm with you @thegalwhorants, I'm a swifty, not a big one, but her voice and music are excellent. Plus Reputation yk?

5. Free Fall by Slot Machine

Lol is commentary even necessary? I'm not even a huge KP fan but this song kills

6. I do not know how to write/copy Thai sorry but its by Selina and Sirin

The Only Friends feels are everywhere it seems. But this is SUCH a beautiful song.

7. betty by Taylor Swift

Same swifty disclaimer as before, this is one of my all time fav T Swift songs and I will take no judgement.

8. Belly Dancer by Imanbek, BYOR

Now here's a throwback I'm surprised to see on my repeat playlist, I guess I listened to it enough that it's lasted lol, for a while I studied to this song on repeat for hoooooours. Don't know why but the repetition is non-distracting, Mad Love above falls into that category too.

9. Pretend by Nanon

Ahhh now this is no surprise, I am currently on ep 13 of the Jungle, hoping to finish it this weekend and this song is gorgeous. Love it, love Nanon, love The Jungle.

10. Bad Habits (feat. Bring Me The Horizon) by Ed Sheeran

oooh finishing off with Ed that rounds it out nicely. Ed Sheeran's concert came to my state in little old down under in March of this year and it was my first ever concert. Love his music and the concert was AMAZING. Though this version of the song can actually be blamed on a recent blend I've joined to drag my music kicking and screaming into any sort of variance as my personal playlists have the original.

I have NO Idea who has already played cause my PhD has suddenly dumped three projects which need immediate attention in my lap all at once so my tumblr time has vanished into the ether.

Of course I COULD stop watching 15 shows at once but they'd have to STOP AIRING first

[Image of Ayan from The Eclipse saying "I don't get myself either"]

Soooo @grapejuicegay @wanderlust-in-my-soul @pandasmagorica play if you want and if you already have feel free to tag me retroactively! I basically only see stuff if I'm tagged these days... or if they happen to appear in the 20 random posts I see at some point through my day.

[esculentevil]

A few years ago, @thorinduil made a post asking “which songs make you think about Thorin, Thranduil and the Thorinduil pairing?” Last year, I answered them via reblog and then kept adding to it as I remembered/thought of more songs... Instead of reblogging THAT reblog for its one year anniversary, I decided to post my answers separately, here, and just update THIS list, instead, from now on. SO! Basically: My Thorinduil Playlist~ xD

"Walk Through the Fire" by Zayde Wolf feat. Ruelle

Also “Young and Beautiful” by Lana del Rey which I literally wrote a fic about.

And “Famous Last Words” by My Chemical Romance; perfect for survivor!Duil

Fuuu!!! “Poison” by Alice Cooper!!! Jive, how did I forget that one? Thank my mate, everyone; s/he reminded me rofl while we RPed

Rediscovered “Empire” by Shakira and think it’d fit them perfectly~

“Steady, as She Goes” by The Raconteurs has major wait too long vibes which, seriously, is 100% Thorinduil (especially since Thorin dies with his glue blood...); altho I’ll admit this one only occurred to me cuz it’s in my mate and I’s playlist and, like with Poison, we were talking about these two yet again lmfao and also this fanvideo which got me thinking of S,aSG halfway through it so... yea

AND “I Don't Care” by Apocalyptica ‘cause it fits/these both reminded me I love it

“I hate U, I love U” by Gnash ft. Olivia O'Brien: this is literally their love story

Perhaps strangely, I think “Sweet Dreams (Are Made Of This)” by Eurythmics, Annie Lennox, and Dave Stewart would work for them--especially Thorin

“Gingerbread Man” by Melanie Martinez; partly because of this video; but also because of the climax of the song not shown in that edit (which is a real shame cuz that was sort of the part that sealed it for me and got me to add it to this list): Thranduil is so the icing on Thorin and Thorin’s so the crumbs on Thranduil and they’re 100% loving hard, fighting, breaking, and eating each other into nothing

“I Want To **** You Like An Animal” by Nine Inch Nails; for obvious reasons

“I'd Do Anything For Love (But I Won't Do That)” by Meat Loaf because, legit, that’s just Thranduil on top of that cliff refusing to throw away his people/family

“Say Something” by A Great Big World because acesout is right

“Unsteady” by X Ambassadors because, after writing “Once I trusted/relied on/believed in you and you let me down” and “Once I had hopes that we could build something beautiful together but reality reminded me that I’m old and ugly and not good enough (for you) so I thought it best to let you go when I should’ve held you” in this and reading acesout’s post linked above and realizing it’s true... I just want to see/read them holding onto each other like this v.v They deserve it.

“Rude Boy” by Rihanna and probably also “Only Girl in the World” by her, too; actually, “We Found Love” ft. Calvin Harris and “Diamonds” and “Stay” ... Huh... Rihanna actually has a LOT of songs perfect for them... their whole love story...

“Enemies” by Lauv because the sentiment is so them.

“Fire” by Wang Yibo because this romance is ALL about playing with fire~

“Accidentally in Love” by Counting Crows cuz it’s literally what happened

“Not Another Song About Love” by Hollywood Ending because, seriously, everything about this song is them: they hate everything about each other while also needing everything about each other and wanting each other’s love ‘til it all runs out ‘cause they’re all that each other’ve been dreaming of~

“I'm Not Afraid” by Tommee Profitt ft. Wondra but mostly just the first part/verse; the rest of it strikes me more as Thranduil fighting depression/Sauron’s shadow while knowing he’s not only lost Thorin as a lover but gained him as an enemy...

“Locked Away” by R. City ft. Adam Levine cuz it’s literally Thorin losing it all--from mountain to crown to gold--and yet not getting that Thranduil locking him up IS him sticking with him, by his side, and grounding him through the goldlust

“Baby Love” by The Supremes because Mizugetsu on YT is a folking genius and I always liked this song anyway--also, it just really fits them rofl and their story

“Teeth” by 5 Seconds of Summer: the “dangerous beauty/love to hate” vibes just work and the simp!Thorin feels--@lady-astria and I were just talking about this!

“Always” by Saliva because there’s nothing unThorin[duil] about it; it’s all them (especially, I think, from Thorin’s POV post-Smaug straight up to BotFA)

“Kiss from a Rose” by Seal because “my power, my pleasure, my shame” period. But also it really does sound like Thorin singing about Thranduil, his lit rose.

"Let Her Go” by Passenger; because sometimes you only know you love him when you turn away from him and his burning home to protect your own... or when you’re dying with a hole in your chest and finally UNDERSTAND WHY your One did that and finally stop hating him for it... because you never did.

“Unconditionally” by Katy Perry because it sounds like Thorin (mostly) and Thranduil grappling with their surprisingly deep love for each other as well as their inability to trust each other after all the betrayals they’ve suffered through; this song is what I think would happen if Thorin just admitted Thranduil was right and a good king for not asking his people to die for the dwarves that ignored him—and if Thorin’s love for Thranduil were stronger than his need to be number 1 or to horde and covet literally everything including Thranduil’s love and attention.

“A Sky Full Of Stars” by Coldplay because, in the canon, Thorin IS this to Duil and Thranduil WAS this to Thorin and every night he sees him there still

“Gravity” by Sara Bareilles; because something always brings them back together—it never takes too long—and they’re always there for each other... even when they’re gone

“A Thousand Years” by Christina Perri because it’s literally reincarnated!Thorin with Never-Sailed!Thranduil forever waiting for his love(s)’s return~

“Broken” by Lifehouse because Thranduil’s still holding post-canon; and, truly, they were both holding onto each other before all that even if they won’t admit it

[coffee-at-annies]

3, 11, and 18!

3. Favorite musical artist / group you started listening to this year?

That I discovered this year? That’s hard. I’m not sure I discovered much music this year that wasn’t new releases from bands I already liked or singular songs. My most listened album of the year was fob cause I’m specific and sm(f)s came out in like January. My song of the year for the second year in a row was one I discovered late last year and fell in love with. I’ve listened to all of 3 songs from the artist tho.

Jukebox the Ghost was probably last year or the year before when my partner introduced me. They’ve tried getting me into The Family Crest but it’s never been the right time for an adhd hyperfixation deep dive. I got back into Matt Maeson after seeing him live, but that was my second time seeing him so he’s not new. I got super into Sammy Rae and the Friends for a hot minute after seeing her live but I first found her during quarantine looking for songs for the moss playlist. If you’ve got a moment, listen to the song I’m gonna link. It’s good. Sammy Rae described it as for the girls and the gays.

I could maybe claim Sub-Radio after Stacey’s Dad went viral but I’ve had flashback in my Spotify likes for a while so connecting the dots was just what got me to listen to more and also follow them on YouTube. If I had to pick a single that isn’t from one of the artists I’ve listed it’d have to be Drink Water.

Maybe the obcr of Some Like It Hot counts? That came out this year. I’m only obsessed with it since I saw the show live right before Christmas last year and then had to wait months for the obcr to come out so idk if it counts.

11. Something you want to do again next year?

Answered that one here with a lot of small joys I’m looking forward to repeating.

18. A memorable meal this year?

I’m trying to think of a meal that was worth remembering. A place that was worth going back to. My first instinct is my mom’s 60th. We splurged and she got reservations for the place up on Mount Washington. The one that overlooks the point. We weren’t close to the windows cause my grandmother can’t do steps and it was rainy but it was a lovely celebration.

Oh! God this is the dumbest fucking story but it’s certainly memorable. So like I’m sure you’re probably vaguely aware that I decided I wanted to be disappointed in new and interesting ways after the Pens let me down so thoroughly last spring that I decided to fuck around and become a Pirates fan. What you probably don’t know bc I didn’t do much lbing is I watched a stupid amount of Pirates games. What you’ve probably forgotten is the Buccs had a ridiculously hot start last season. 20-8 in the month of April. One of those games was actually two - rain reschedule meant it was a double header. My best friend spent the day taking his black belt test (I forgot if he’s second or third degree now but he passed!) and wanted to go out to celebrate. There’s a new-ish chain crab place in the waterfront where the TGIF used to be. The bestie isn’t a sports person at all but my sister and I are so we asked for the tv to be switched to the game. The second game of the double header was one where the Buccs scored 16 runs off the Nats for a final score of 16-1. Watching them light up basically every Nats pitcher who hadn’t pitched in the earlier game while systematically demolishing an order of crab legs was just an excellent experience. Was the food memorable? Eh the crab is fine for a chain. The meal itself was very very fun. Like exactly what you want when watching a game at a bar/restaurant. I won’t say platonic ideal but like the vibes were certainly right.

End of the Year Asks

[mentality-of-wukong-au]

Like this https://www.tumblr.com/mentality-of-wukong-au/727942315237408768/spirit-logs

*Rin Muhou Havoc.

A lot has changed since these three have gained the power of a physical form. My dear Mow has gone missing so I’ll have to write the logs manually…

As I said before, Rin Muhou is an adoptive child of Chikao Muhou, the Red Buttocked Horse Monkey. (It’s a Baboon…why is this his full name? It’s literally just a Baboon) They were the first to have problems regarding gaining her physical form, thus Mow decided to give her shapeshifting. This was actually a problem for me, I didn’t express it much in my last log, but Mow turned them into physical beings….without my permission…

Anyway…she was rewarded for their spectacular feat in changing the mind of The Jade Emperor, which is a spectacular achievement considering The Azure Lion, a long-time Celestial was turned away for his ‘oversight and vision’ of this world…honestly why did the boy even try? At least The Havocs ensured that they wouldn’t cause Chaos anymore when they had children…though I wonder if the Bermuda Triangle counts…She also defended Wukong against the 10 Kings who most notably did the most stupidest thing I’ve seen in a while, because how the fuck did you forget the Monkey King has a lock on his door? Then again they were up against a child…imagine getting dropped kicked by a child in court, that’s hilarious. Especially if you’re like a millennia old god like the 10 Kings and The Jade Emperor.

Rin has gone through so much in these past…gee I don’t even know how many arcs there were…the chaos seems to spread within her children as they plummet into the depths that his the chaotic adventures of old.

I remember she lost an arm? How did that happen again?

Antonio Muhou Havoc (Or Shifu)

Most of my data of him is the same…Got adopted, joined the mafia, disappeared for 13 years. Died, revived, err…did he die again or was that Rin? No wait it was Mathias…nah…I’m getting them mixed up…Jesus…

He got pregnant with twins (Yes that can happen even though he’s a dude) and still continued his work in the mafia, he’s a family-oriented guy, a sweet husband, with the power to summon whatever he wants at will. He has two siblings, (Biological) who still work a clothing shop in Megapolis, they helped with Zazhu’s wedding dress, which looked so nice by the way. Love their sense of taste. I will add that the guy has abandonment issues and self-worth issues to work on. But Rin seems to have the guilty trauma and low self-esteem.

Mathias Muhou Havoc.

Aroace and an emotional guy, who loves potions. And science, give this guy a lab coat, some gloves and goggles and you have yourself Tongbei’s little mad scientist in crime. (Seriously Tongbei CANNOT make a proper potion at times, do NOT trust him to make poison for you, because likely he will kill instead of incapacitate)

Might act all tough but he’s a soft cookie for his family. He was once a villain named ‘Xiu’ the guy that gave him identity issues due to Paramita’s Mask…he keeps blaming himself, but seriously, you can’t blame yourself for wanting attention, that’s just basic human stuff mate.

I’m not even going to add his past life, because I know a large number of people in this community will end up dead-naming him and I will personally break anyone’s neck so should that happen. However, Mathias died due to suffocation, due to his Mask that got glued to him when he died. I now realized the reason why Mow chose disintegrating power, because she thought it’d be ‘funny’ to let the guy who died from suffocation, have the ability to technically suffocate his enemies in ASH. I find her humor quite concerning…

And lastly is Zazhu Shifu (Or Muhou Havoc)

I placed a separate log for him actually because I noticed something concerning about him…

But you didn’t hear that from me…perhaps he’s here because he’s Antonio’s husband.

Zazhu Shifu is the Brother of the Great Monk’s reincarnate, ‘Tang Shifu’ he is the first born of a very shitty family, who cared no less of him and abandoned him in the car to die of heatstroke (Yes they literally wanted to kill him.) fortunately he was miraculously saved when the mafia he joined, accidentally kidnapped him too and brought him to the leader, whom eventually adopted him as his own.

Cue years later, and Zazhu fixed his relationship with Tang (It was strained due to their parents) and eventually the brothers rebelled against their parents, living happily under the comfort of their husbands and children.

Zazhu is a skilled mortal, with no magical capabilities, his main weapon is a gun (obviously) and he has abnormal speed and agility, being able to dodge bullets even on the run. There are rumors that he also has high-pain tolerance, though I’m not sure if that theory is true…

Then there’s his connection as Tang’s brother…I’m just wondering if there are any side effects…

Oh well…can’t place that here, can I?