#eggs are very much not easy to come by right now either with how much everything costs so i hesitate to call them poor folk food but clv

[lupismaris]

I will say there is a gift in being so enamored with the simplest meals. Egg yolks have 16% of the daily dose of iodine apparently so I've been denied a hot fried breakfast for the last month. I've always been one for simple farmers breakfasts but for the moment they're even more precious. God I'm a sap.

[etheries1015]

Etheries hello! If you're open to requests right now, could you write something for twst where they find out (gender neutral but presumably afab) reader is pregnant with their child? I'd love to request for Azul, Vil, Malleus, and Rollo specifically but any others you think would be fun to write would be fun to read too. Thank you!!

YYYAAAA!!! I LOVE THIS CONCEPT Twst men with children make me so giddy inside hehehehe. Especially the non-humans for some reason, like Fae and Mer folk aosiefjlskadjf

You're pregnant!! Their reaction?

you know what, I decided to throw in how many daughters/sons I'd think they would have, too. For shits and giggles.

Featuring: Azul, Vil, Malleus, and of course I need to add my baby girl Lilia <3 I'm sorry, I really can't write Rollo, I sat here for an hour trying to think of something, but I suppose he is where my creativity halts... my apologies. I hope you like this nonetheless!

General warnings: Afab reader, but no pronouns are used. I feel like there is obvious malleus favoritism because I think he's a huge simp that wants a bunch of babies LMFAOOO, there's so much to write on him. And Lilias is a little bit more on the angsty side of things...but overall fluffy! Not very proofread either <3

Azul

He is BEYOND anxious. More anxious than he had ever felt in his entire life. You? His lovely significant other, pregnant, with HIS child? His offspring?

Almost faints at the news. When you tell him the news, he just stares at you with wide eyes and jaw ajar.

He is happy, truly, but he's honestly a mess. Will this be a mostly human child? Will you be giving birth to an octo-egg? Will they need to be birthed in the water of the sea? So many uknown variables and questions swim in his mind, but his first plan of action is to hug you tightly and sob into your shoulder.

CONSTANT doctor checkups. He's asking you to go more often than they would recommend, but he can't help it. He needs to be 10000% certain that you are going to be okay and find out what form his child will be taking.

Imagine if it's twins, oh my gosh. He would actually faint.

his children will have a never-ending supply of love from Uncle Jade and Uncle Floyd

Weird presents, probably ingesting food from the sea by his recommendation, prenatal potions, and bed rest. If he read it, you were doing it. Your health was his number one priority.

Azul is probably leaning towards a traditional father, going to work and getting as much profit as possible to support you and his children. But of course, he will take a significant amount of time off to help you and any obstacles that come with having a mer-folks child.

On the sweeter side...

His hands will be trembling ever so slightly, with tears in his eyes every time he feels your stomach. He will kiss your stomach, and lay on your lap to be close by. He can't believe he has come so far in life- to the point where he has a beautiful significant other such as yourself and a child on the way.

He worries about many things, finances, being able to get the most out of life, if he will be able to provide for you and this child, and the kind of life his child will have.

Kind of hopes that his child is mostly human. He was bullied for his species, being slow, pudgy, and whatnot. That's not the life he wants for his children if they end up looking more like him.

You're able to calm his nerves, though. All in all, he is incredibly excited to meet his new baby, and will be doing so by his beloveds side <3

I personally see him having one child. Probably a boy, probably an easy baby. I don't think Azul would want more than one child.

Vil

the moment he saw that positive pregnancy test, he had a conflicting wave of emotions.

Of course his outward reaction was to hug you, stroke your head, and pepper your face in kisses. Of course, the news elated him, he seemed calm and collected enough, but there were many worries in his mind.

He doesn't want to accidentally "ruin" his child.

Vil was always in the face of cameras, the face of the public's wary eye, and was hyper-focused on his image and how others may perceive him.

He would hate to accidentally subject his child to the same watchful eye of the public and create this whole image that he needs to be perfect. He wants this child to grow up how they choose, with good values, instead of fearing what may come out of the public opinion.

always hiding you and shielding you from paparazzi. He wanted to hide the news that you were pregnant until later down the line. There are some crazy fans out there, and he would never risk something happening to you. Face masks and disguises were not unknown to you from dating him already at this point, but it was almost as if it came out tenfold.

Rook and Epel = sweetest most doting uncles ever!

Vil had to slap Rook on the head when he felt like Rook was getting a little too handsy with your baby bump.

Epel made sure you had the best batch of apples straight from the farm! Good for the baby, he says!

Vil loves playing music for you and his child, piano, singing...he loves it. it's great bonding for the both of you. He'd hum and sing songs to your stomach while rubbing it gently.

Finances will never pose a problem. Another thing that was never a problem, was Vil going out of his way to take off work and make sure he was there to properly take care of you. You never felt abandoned and alone despite his busy schedule and the fact he was always out doing some sort of movie shoot or commercial, he would never hesitate to take off or call in if you were having a particularly rough day.

Overall, he's excited! He hopes the baby grows up in their own skin and individuality, making choices for themselves when it comes to their career path. And a little side note...he really liked how cute you looked waddling around pregnant with a baby bump. Heuehue.

I can envision you and Vil possibly having two-three children, pretty even in age difference. Depends! I think he would like a big family, get a home with plenty of space. I can see him with both boys and girls, I think I see Vil being a really good "girl dad" tho.

Malleus

absolutely ecstatic. He wanted this so so so bad. He was over the moon. He held back an embarrassing display of giggling and fangirling over the fact he impregnated you, instead opted with a smile and a "Wonderful."

You sometimes wonder if he purposefully did something to result in your pregnancy because I like to think he's a little bit insane like that, but it's okay! You don't mind!

This man wants so. many. kids. Half-fae Half human children run around the castle bringing it to life and showing off the world the unity between humans and faes. He doesn't care if anyone else doesn't agree with this, he on the other hand is absolutely bemused by you and the fact you are bearing his children.

Will they come out as eggs needing to be hatched? How long will it take to hatch with your nonmagical side? Will they have mostly human attributes? Will his fae genetics be so dominant that it's like a bunch of little copies of him? Will his child have your ears and his eyes? and vise versa? will his child come out looking just like he did, in a full dragon form, or will his child come out like a normal human? He has asked ALL of these questions and more. He is so excited.

Buys a lot of clothes, builds rooms in the castle (yes, rooms. because he knows you will have more of his children and wants to be prepared.) "Can never have enough to be prepared for all outcomes," He says. Whatever floats his boat, I suppose!

Appoints the most skilled doctors there is in the Valley. You are always, without a doubt, taken care of. He reads piles upon piles of parenting books, he's always by your side, to the point where sometimes he brings you into important meetings just to be sure you were in his sights.

He vows his children will never feel the crushing lonliness he did as a child. He vouches to always be availble to have meals with his children, to play with his children, and be active in their learning process. He will allow them to travel all over and gain knowledge, and be certain they will never feel like they are missing out on anything.

He LOVES your baby bump. At night in bed he will press his ear up against your stomach, rub it, kiss it, talk to it. He is so infatuated with you and your body. Kisses every single stretch mark, and his hands are all over you. Seeing you pregnant with his child stirs up some sort of desire to keep you that way, but he tries to...push down this part of him. For the most part. Heuheu.

And when you two are sleeping, his dragon tail always comes out to wrap around you protectively. It's his way of making sure both of you are safe through the night because sevens forbid anything happens to his beloved and their child(ren).

Honestly, I am a firm believer that Malleus would have twins, for some reason. Two hatchlings! Together! A boy and a girl. (I have a whole fic idea for this...you'll probably see it one day. heuheu.) or two boys. I think it would be super chaotic with two twins with big draconic features and attitudes, alot of running around and mischief in the house!! He would of course go on to have more children with you. I think it may become an addiction for him. Or not! I can also see him being content with two.

Lilia

Honestly, when you first gave him the news, he was uncertain how to feel. He inquired if you were serious,him raising a child at his age? He wasn't certain he'd be able to do it. He raised Silver, and now that his magic reserves were dwindling, he was worried he wouldn't be able to fully be there for you and your baby.

"Lilia...i'm pregnant." Once those words left your lips, his normal silly demeanor dropped slightly. He had a thoughtful look upon his face, eyes wide staring at you. He asked if you were certain, and it was initially a long and deep discussion about your future together and how things will pan out.

After talking it out, a few tears and heartfelt moments, Lilia smiled brightly and gave you the biggest hug and kiss on the cheek. He started to become a little more excited! And once you shared the news with Silver, Malleus, and Sebek, they were more than happy to pitch in a helping hand.

Honestly, I think as he saw your baby bump grow, so did his excitement. He of course loved the children he adopted more than anything in the entire world, but something about looking at you holding your tummy full of his very own blood, it felt...different.

He was nervous, for sure. This was a child that was going to carry his lineage, his very own DNA coursing through that baby. He wasn't sure how things would turn out but prayed that this baby would have a life of peace and acceptance, unlike his war-filled days and alienation for being a lesser type of fae.

He was OBSESSED with how you looked pregnant. He could get used to this sight, you waddling around, swollen feet... for more in-depth details about how he felt about you being pregnant, you can take a read at this fic I wrote a while ago about it. All in all, he pampers you to death. Rubbing your feet, kissing your stomach, tracing your stretch marks with his fingers...oh he could truly get used to this.

He does fear what the future may hold. He wants all of his children to see him at his strongest, not to see him slowly give into old age as his magic fades to nothing. You may have to reassure him a few times throughout your pregnancy that you and this child will love him no matter what, and remind him that YOU are magicless as well. And Lilia would make an amazing father, with or without his "power." It's his personality and determination as an amazing, child-loving figure that will give this child a life to look forward to.

Once he gets over the insecurities about becoming a father to a new half-fae, half-human baby, he starts to dig up old parenting books he used to have.

He will give this baby, and you, as much love as he possibly can <3\

I can see Lilia with a girl! Probably just one baby, because he can only handle so much anymore! He would be an AMAZING girl dad. He would be a great father regardless of the gender of the baby, but I can really see him with a daughter for some reason. The visions are strong with this one.

[jieunoclock]

Love Your Feeling || Chapter five

- When JK meets Mom₊˚⊹♡

“Yun, you shouldn’t smoke,” he tries to discuss. “Neither should you, you look stupid,” I tell him,

Pair: jjk x femOC, college students, best friends

Word count: 4.2k

Warning: this chapter includes slight substance use⚠️

masterlist || taglist

!Friends to Lovers, Protective Brother, Secret Dating, Friends with Benefits, Angst, Mature content, Dysfunctional Family, Fluff, Smut, Mentions of Alcoholism and Abuse

——————————————————————₊˚⊹♡

Up, down. Up, down. Up… down… is the pace Jungkook’s chest goes at. It’s one of those moments where you’re mad that you woke up, so you keep your eyes closed in hopes you’ll go back to sleep.

Kinda like wanting to jump back into a dream, but it rarely ever happens unless you’re sleepy enough for it. In 1 out of maybe 10 scenarios you actually are sleepy enough, same goes for this instance.

I feel Jungkook move his arm, the tips of his fingers tucking a piece of hair behind my ear. His fingers fall to my shoulder trailing down before settling his whole hand on my upper arm.

It’s a Sunday, which usually consists of doing groceries and cleaning up the mess at home. So, if I can stretch this afternoon out as long as possible, I will.

I can already predict what awaits me at home; Beer bottles on the floor surrounding the couch, dirty dishes piling up in the sink, a load of dirty underwear and towels peeking out of the laundry basket, and probably a foul smell coming from somewhere you’re unable to locate.

Lost in thought, I eventually get sick of staying in the same position. I open my eyes with a soft groan, seeing there’s a blanket placed over us. That must mean Mingyu has seen us cuddled up on the couch, as he was probably getting his breakfast.

I slowly move my chin up to see Jungkook with his eyes closed, head slightly faltered to the side. My movement doesn’t give him any reaction, which must mean he’s fallen back asleep.

I untangle myself from his grip, careful not to wake him as I tuck him in with the blanket that was once lying over me, repeating Mingyu’s past actions of the day.

My clothes from the night before are still on his bedroom floor, crumpled up into a pile. I debate for a second if I should hop in the shower or not but I just know that if I don’t I’ll feel disgusting for the rest of the day.

Using Jungkook’s shampoo and body wash I now must smell just like him. He’s a sucker for good skincare so -with the little time I have for myself- I use his to wash my face and moisturize it.

Usually, I dry my hair with a hair dryer, it’s the best for the length of my hair. Letting it air dry takes hours and a hair dryer leaves an overall nicer finish. But since Jungkook is still sleeping, I pat my hair down with a towel and leave it at that. Too afraid that the noise will eventually wake him up.

Freshly out of the shower, dressed, moisturized skin, I’m now growing hungry. It’s a nice thank you to Jungkook if I’ll make him breakfast right? I know he likes anything containing literal flour, so that should be an easy task.

Compared to the fridge at home, this one is filled with food and ingredients. Milk and eggs in the refrigerator, flour found somewhere in one of his cabinets I decide to make him pancakes.

It checks off everything from the list; easy, tasty, great breakfast, contains flour. And I really don’t want to sound cocky, but over the years I’ve become a quite good cook. It was either, learning how to cook or living off of plain shin ramyun every single day. It’s the only ramen Yoongi would want to spend his money on, says it’s ‘without a doubt tasty, so it isn’t a waste of money’.

Unfortunately, I don’t know how to make them delicious, Japanese pancakes, like the lovely lady from the cafe does. But I do know how to make delicious crepes. Plus, they don’t require much effort.

Not even the smell of the crepes baking in the pan is enough to wake Jungkook again, which must mean he’s very tired. With his crepe now done baking, I top it with some sugar and lemon juice and place it on the counter.

Mine is now spread out on the pan, waiting to be flipped over. I walk over to the couch, placing a hand on Jungkook’s abs to shake him awake.

“Kook” a loud groan sounds from his throat, eyes sleepy trying to open them fully. “Smells good,” he says closing his eyes again and dropping the back of his head on the armrest ready to fall back to asleep.

“Yours is done already, come on,” that’s enough to get him up apparently, as before I know it he’s in the kitchen in front of his plate.

"What you wanna do today?" he asks me as he takes a bite off of his fork, humming in approval. I flip my crepe in the pan waiting for it to be done. "I need to do groceries and then clean up the apartment," I explain. he gives me a questioning look wondering why I'm the one who cleans at home.

"doesn't Yoongi do anything in the household?" I sprinkle some sugar on my crepe adding a bit of lemon juice before sitting down next to Jungkook. "Well, on rare occasions I guess,"

Jungkook disapproves, tells me that I need to protest by not cleaning anything. As if I havent thought of that. There was this one time I figured it wasn't fair for me to do all the housecleaning, which led to a huge fight between me and Yoongi. He told me he brought in the majority of the money within the household therefore it's only fair for me to do the shopping, cleaning, and cooking. even though I work as well. not as much as him since I still have school, but still I bring money into the household. more than mother ever would

"I'll help you" he then offers. Is he insane? nope, nu-uh. I tell him he's not coming home with me, to which he whines. and we eventually agree on just doing groceries together. Jungkook just has to get changed real quick and we’ll be off.

he changes into a simple white tee and blue baggy jeans, basic but stylish. he grabs his car keys and we make our way to the vehicle.

He drives us to a nearby store, one that I’ve never been to before. I don’t know what’s in the fridge at home if there’s anything really. But over the years I’ve picked up a kind of routine, buying almost the same kinds of things every single time.

Some kind of fruit, a family pack of ramen, eggs, milk, spring onions, a snack, and 2 packs of coke. It reaches just about our weekly budget and feeds us more than enough.

We walk inside of the store, trying to navigate anything that’s in my list. But the prices aren’t the ones that I’m used to, this store is far too overpriced.

I thug at his shirt, lowering my voice so none of the employees will hear me when I tell him I can’t afford it here.

“Uhm, Kook. This is far too expensive,” he looks at me as if I’m crazy, checking the prices for himself. “Where do you go then?”

I tell him it’s better to go to mine and drag him out of the store by his arm, buying nothing.

The one on my side of the city is a family-held business, I know the owners really well. The mother of the business used to be classmates with my mother, she’s always been nice enough to occasionally check up on me.

The products are far cheaper than whatever Jungkook’s store was, pointing out to him how much cheaper it actually is.

I send him off to grab me a pack of shin ramyun as I pick out some fruit, settling for a honeydew melon cause it’s probably one of my favourite fruits.

Gathering everything else and making our way to the cash register, I get greeted by the mother. She asks me how I’m doing and if my mom is okay.

I don’t want to bother her with the details by telling her she’s drunk at home so I just tell her she’s fine and been working hard, even though she doesn’t even have a job at this point.

She’s even so nice to pack the groceries up for me handing me a plastic bag whilst giving me a free bag of crisps.

However, after paying, Jungkook is still caught up in looking at the vitrine behind the counter. “One pack of cigarettes and a lighter please,” he says to her.

I’m certainly taken aback, I didn’t know he smoked. I mean I’ve seen him smoke before at parties but only rarely, never have I seen him buy a pack for himself.

I wait for us to be outside again before asking him about it, waving my mom’s friend goodbye. I load the bag of groceries onto the back seat of his car and want to sit back in the passenger seat but Jungkook just stands in front of the store.

I see him take a cigarette out of the packaging lighting it up between his lips. I stand next to him looking. At the big road that lays behind the parking lot.

“Since when do you smoke?” He raises an eyebrow at me.

“Today apparently,” he answers.

Unsatisfied with his decision, this just only asks for a new addiction. So to protest I hold out my hand, non-verbally asking him for a cigarette myself.

I hear him chuckle and he shakes his head. “No way Nayun,” he says with a big grin on his face. I try to force my hand in his pocket to just grab it but he’s stronger than me and pulls me away, telling me off.

With a big pout on my face, I decide this is unfair storming back into the store and getting another pair; a pack of cigarettes and a lighter. Do I have the money for it? Not really but sure, I’ll survive, financially that is.

So now I’m standing next to him, smoking my own cigarette.

“Yun, you shouldn’t smoke,” he tries to discuss.

“Neither should you,” I look at him blowing the stupid cigarette smoke out of his lungs, it looks damn hot I’m afraid to admit.

“You look stupid,” I tell him, even though he doesn’t. Cigarettes taste like shit, I should invest in one of them stupid-looking disco vapes.

He just chuckles at my remark and stays silent until we’ve both completely smoked up the cigarette.

“C'mon, I should really get home,” I nudge at him back to the car. The drive is literally 3 minutes, I usually walk this route.

I thank him for driving me but as I slam the door shut, the car turns off and Jungkook gets out too.

“What are you doing?” I ask him with a nervous chuckle. “Helping you out?”

I told him off on helping me to clean up already but he seemed determined, though he could also just mean walking me to my door. That’s just stupid, he always just dropped me off at a bus stop so why would he walk me all the way to my door now? You can see my door from the car so it’s just stupid to do that.

“What do you mean helping me out?..” I frown at him in confusion.

“Yun I don’t care what you say, I’m helping you clean,” he says as he walks towards the stairwell. I try my best to stop him, yelling after him in protest whilst running behind him like an idiot.

Though he really stands his ground, doesn’t let my protests stop him from getting to my house. The first time he’s here, in our long seven or eight-year friendship. I decide to just give in, cause I can’t just stand outside all day.

As I open the front door, the first thing you’ll see is the bathroom door. It’s not big enough to conceal the sight of the living room next to it. You can see everything as soon as you open it; living room in front, kitchen to your left, bedroom door wide open.

Mom still hasn’t come back, as for Yoongi I wouldn’t know. Yoongi usually leaves early in the mornings and comes back home late in the evening or night, I’ve learned to stop worrying about it. most of the time he spends it with his friends, Seokjin and Namjoon, sometimes even Hoseok, doing god knows what.

Having my house on display like this is vulnerable there are absolutely no filters you can put on it. No fake smiles, no ‘it’s fine’, there are no excuses when it’s like this.

And it’s truly shocking how bad it can get in a week’s worth. The couch is empty aside from the empty take-out box, Dad’s blanket, and some beer cans.

I look at Jungkook trying to see what his reaction is, but it’s fairly normal. I can see the slightest bit of shock on his face, his forehead creased a little. But it’s quick to soften up as he notices me swinging my head around, acting as if it’s the most normal case in the world.

“Welcome home I guess,” I say nervously.

He doesn’t say anything and takes his shoes off after me following right behind me into my house. I set the bag of groceries down on the kitchen counter, unpacking it and crumbling the plastic bag to go into a bigger plastic bag that’s stored in one of our cabinets.

“Are there supposed to be shards of glass on the ground?” I look back at him to see he’s standing by the window, next to the couch where a bottle had smashed during a fight between Yoongi and Mom.

“Oh yeah no I haven’t had time to clean it yet,” I explain.

It leaves him with a bunch of questions; what happened? Why is there a smashed bottle on the ground? Did you hurt anyone? Did you get hurt? But he just leaves it be and doesn’t question it any further.

“What can I do?” He asks me. I wouldn’t want to bother him with a hard task, because he’s a guest and of course he doesn’t know where anything is here.

I look around the room to see what he can do, spotting the beer crate in the corner of the kitchen and the bottles gathered around the couch and coffee table. I think it’s the perfect job for him to do just that, not too difficult for a guest and it’ll keep him busy for a little to stop complaining.

I hand him the crate and tell him to put the bottles In there as I focus on doing the dishes.

I tell him to look good for any lost bottles until the crate is completely filled up with them and to then put them out in the hall.

Luckily there aren’t many dishes, mainly bowls and chopsticks stacked up in the sink. So when Jungkook has put the crate outside I’m already done with washing all of them.

Now there are two things left to do; taking out the garbage and doing the laundry. None of these tasks seem appropriate for Jungkook to do, I don’t want to bother him and he doesn’t want me to be bothered by doing these tasks on my own.

He pushes me onto doing the laundry, he’s gonna take care of the garbage. The laundry room is opposite the bathroom right next to my bedroom, completely closed off from the kitchen.

It takes me some time as I put some clothes in the dryer the other day and hadn’t had the time to fold them yet, so that’s included in today’s task. Taking the dirty laundry baskets out of the bathroom, my room, and Yoongi’s and turning on the washer to do a quick dark wash.

Would’ve been embarrassing to let Jungkook fold the laundry, worse, load the washer. There’s lingerie in here that I wouldn’t want him to see, no matter the fact that he’s seen parts of me that even my best girlfriends haven’t.

Since it’s only clothing of Yoongi and I, only rarely ever mom’s clothing. It doesn’t take me an awful long time to fold everything separating the clothes into two piles, one for Yoongi and one for me. Putting both of them on our beds.

The doorbell then rings, I’m not expecting anyone. Mom doesn’t ring the doorbell, neither does Yoongi. Jungkook is quick to open the door before I’m able to reach the living room, I immediately notice how neat it is. It doesn’t surprise me completely, Jungkook’s apartment is always spotless and super tidy. I have no idea how he was able to do it here in the little amount of time that I was gone.

Not a single piece of rubbish that’s lying around or a bad odour lingering somewhere, not even a speck of dust that’s able to be found at the moment.

Jungkook doesn’t take long at the door, greets the person on the other side, and receives a package from them. None of us ever order anything so it must be the wrong address, though Jungkook seems sure of it and places the box on the coffee table.

“Dinner!” He chimes, utensils already set on the coffee table.

He ordered a large box of fried chicken, one of those luxurious ones where they dress it up all nicely and stuff. I don’t think I can remember the last time we had takeout, probably at Jia’s house or something. Certainly not with my family, Yoongi will always say it’s too expensive.

“Are you insane?!” I yell at him. He’s being far too generous, cleaning up for me and ordering me dinner?

There are certainly four different flavours, sweet and spicy, extra crispy, honey butter, and soy garlic. I don’t know if we’ll be able to finish all of it.

I turn on the TV to watch something, nothing that’s on cable really catches my attention. And neither does Jungkook so I pout at him begging him a little to log into his Netflix account, it receives a little chuckle from him as he takes the remote out of my hand logging into the account.

He lets me choose whatever I want, and suddenly in the mood to rewatch Alice in Borderland. And even though he has seen it already, he attentively watches the show with his cheeks full of chicken.

We make it about 1/3 through the box before I’m already full, Jungkook’s appetite lays a little higher than mine, and continues eating a bit more than me but it doesn’t take him long to sigh at the fullness of his stomach as well.

I take a sip of my soda and hear the front door open, both Yoongi and Mom walking inside. She doesn’t look good, eye bags that are darker than my hair, hair all messy I swear there’s leaves in them. Yoongi looks tired too, in a different way than Mom though. Yoongi just looks sleepy as for Mom she looks sleep-deprived and lifeless.

Jungkook stands up from the ground immediately, bowing to greet my mother and Yoongi politely. He has never actually met my mother, he’s heard about her a hundred thousand times but never actually met her.

She tries her best to cheer up at the sight of jungkook, telling him how glad she is to finally meet him and how handsome he is. She quite literally squeezes his bicep and praises him for how strong he is. Shes acting like a fool, as if she’s a teenager again. It also doesn’t help that she doesn’t stop drinking, even if she’s already drunk.

Yoongi and Mom settle around the coffee table nibbling away on the chicken whilst Mom asks Jungkook a bunch of questions, asking about his parents and how he grew up and whatnot. Yoongi and I just stay silent, heads down.

It makes me sad seeing how much effort she’s putting into getting to know Jungkook, she never cares to ask anything about us. Whenever we leave the house for days, she doesn’t care. Whenever someone comes back injured or crying, she doesn’t bat an eye.

It just hurts knowing you’re the problem. Whenever she acts careless I’ll just brush it off as something she does, but seeing her act like this just puts a stamp on us being the problem.

It takes her a whole one-hour conversation to doze off, Yoongi drags her to the couch lying her down on it and she’s out like a light.

It’s nearly 9 pm now so Jungkook thinks it’s better to be off. Yoongi thanks him for the food and apologises for our mother’s behaviour, leaving me to walk Jungkook back to his car.

“Thank you so much for helping me out today, it means a lot,” I say as we’re standing beside his car.

“It’s no problem, it was nice to meet your mom. And of course, see where you live for once,” he adds.

“I guess I was always a little embarrassed about it but… I know I can trust you,”

He takes a step closer to me tugging me into a warm embrace.

“No need to be embarrassed about anything okay?” He says. I nod against his cheesy hugging his waist tightly saying our goodbyes.

I can’t hug him too long in case Yoongi might see and suspect things that aren’t there. He seems to be in a calm mood, I wouldn’t want to blow that up right now.

And then Jungkook drives off. It’s awfully quiet out, it’s almost dark leaving the air in an awkward grey color.

I release a big sigh before making my way back up to the apartment, where Yoongi is cleaning up the mess that was left behind at our dinner party.

“Where’d you find her?” I ask him, referencing him coming home with Mom.

“Found her on a bench somewhere near the city,” he explains. There’s no emotion behind it, the same goes for me. It doesn’t sound sad, angry, annoyed, happy or cold. Just, normal.

“I’m really sorry about what happened,” his voice changes, it sounds genuine and apologetic.

“I shouldn’t have said any of that,” he holds his head down whilst I’m trying to stay neutral before I break down in tears again.

But Yoongi doesn’t really go in on it any further, doesn’t talk about Dad or repeat anything that he shouted at me in the convenience store.

Instead, he tells me to wait as he disappears into his room, coming out with a rectangular box that’s wrapped in pink paper with a little bow in it.

“Here, I got you something,” he held it out for me to accept.

I take the package in hand unwrapping it eagerly, revealing the corner of a white box, and until it’s fully unwrapped I see he’s gifted me an iPhone. An iPhone 14 Pro Max to be exact.

I stutter in response, “What? Are you serious?”

A big grin appears on his face, proud of having such a reaction to his gift.

“This is far too expensive, are you crazy!?” I exclaim.

“I saved up, you deserved it. I smashed the other one anyways,” he acts nonchalant as if it’s nothing. I hug him tightly, still in complete unbelief.

“Thank you Yoongi,” I say as he gives me a small tight tight-lipped smile, he tells me to be careful with it and most of all enjoy it before he’s about to disappear into his room.

I remember seeing Dad yesterday and I should probably talk to him about it, it’s his dad too after all.

“Wait Yoongi,” I hesitate.

He turns around on his feet eyebrows raised a little, intently listening to whatever I have to say.

“I ran into Dad yesterday…” I can see his face drop instantly bombarding me with questions.

He’s worried, I can tell that whatever he said yesterday fades away just like that. He’s a softie deep inside.

I explained to him that I saw him in the elevator and that Jungkook saved me just in time, switching up the names cause I wouldn’t want to cause any more trouble.

“It hurts me too… I know you hate him and that you’re hurt, but I’m the person who had to live through all of it,” I sob softly.

He shushes me pulling me into a long hug, keeping me safe from anything and everything. “Be careful next time you go to Jungkook’s apartment okay, you don’t know what he’s capable of,”

“And call me if you see him, I promise I won’t lash out on you anymore,”

My tears are coming to a stop, leaving out water less and less. He asks me if he can do anything for me which I decline and then he really disappears into his room, wishing me a good night.

I feel so relieved. Things with Yoongi are good, Jungkook isn't embarrassed by me I think and I have a new freaking phone. It was time for an upgrade to be fair.

But I’ll set that up tomorrow, I’ll just watch a show and go to sleep cause I think I deserve some rest after everything that has been happening.

prev | next

[ragingduststorm]

Love's not a competition

No, I didn't like Rebel Moon. Yes, I still wrote about 20 pages of self-insert fanfiction. I just love Atticus Noble and Kai too much, so yeah. I don't know if I'll ever post the rest, but I loved this threesome scene from the second to last chapter so much. Enjoy!

What happened so far: Y/N used to be a smuggler and in a relationship with Kai, she got imprisoned by the Imperium and both thought the other was dead. Y/N was later "found" by Atticus, he developed an unhealthy obsession with her, it was all really toxic tbh. A lot of stuff happened, now the war is over, the Imperium is no more, Atticus and Y/N live a quiet life with Kai as a frequent visitor.

Word count: ~2,1k

Warning: absolute smut fest, 18+, threesome, oral (male receiving), p in v, polyamory, a bit of voyeurism, a bit of praise Y/N uses she/her pronouns Atticus Noble post redemption arc so he's actually kinda nice (still a bit obsessive though)

Atticus arrived back at the cottage in a good mood. He’d bartered their excess of eggs and mushrooms away successfully and none of the people in the village had given him a dirty look or a mean comment. The first time in the four months he’d lived on this planet. This way of living, stationary, surrounded by nature and community, was still strange to him but it was necessary. It was either this or a cold prison cell on a distant moon. And this way, at least she was here to greet him when he came back.

His mood soured though as he saw the ship that had landed on the landing strip. Kai was back. Of course, Atticus’ luck had run out. He’d wished so hard for the ship to crash, for Kai to be stranded on an icy planet, freezing to death. But then, Y/N would have been sad and grieving. And as much as he didn’t want the other man here, her happiness was more important to him. He braced himself as he entered through the main door, reminding himself that he’d agreed to this. This way, Y/N was his. It didn’t matter that she also belonged to someone else. What he hadn’t been ready for, were the lewd noises emanating from one of the bedrooms. Moans, wet skin slapping against wet skin, the creak of the bed. At least they’d been nice enough not to use the bedroom he’d shared with her most nights. But now he just stood there, in the middle of the living room, unsure of what to do with himself. Should he just go out, take a walk? What if they still weren’t done when he came back? Atticus remembered the hours upon hours they had spent together. And even when he’d been spent, her ravenous appetite had kept them going until he was ready again. His cock throbbed with the memories.

For a second, he thought about spending the night in the barn. But he had no idea how long Kai was planning to stay before flying off into the universe again and Atticus could hardly sleep with the animals for weeks. Well, he could. He imagined it would be similar to being back in the barracks at the academy. But he really didn’t want to. This was his home too, after all. So, he quietly made his way to his bedroom and sat on the bed. His bed, their bed, it was all still very new and complicated to him. And the bad thing was, he could still hear them going at it. From her hoarse screams he could deduce that she’d come at least once and that she wasn’t anywhere close to being done. He knew that he really, really shouldn’t, but he closed his eyes and imagined she was making those noises because of him. She’d only done it last night, so it wasn’t hard to conjure up the image. When she’d sat on his face and come on his tongue. He’d practically begged her to do it. Nothing compared to her taste. And then she’d slid effortlessly onto him, all wet and tight. With some embarrassment he realized he’d been stroking himself through his pants. Yesterday he’d appreciated these loose garments for how easy they were to take off, now he hated them.

Air. That’s what he needed right now. He stood up a little too fast, too eager to escape these sounds and he felt lightheaded. His cock was still hard and throbbing, but he was determined. Until he left the bedroom and saw that the door at the end of the short hall was slightly ajar. Her screams were now muffled. Was she biting into a pillow? Into his flesh? Atticus touched the bruise on his neck she’d left last night, right at the end. Surely, they were so enraptured with each other, they wouldn’t notice if he took a quick peak. But what was he hoping to see? She would be filled by another. Someone who, admittedly, was slightly larger than he was, in more ways than one. Would he break when he saw Kai thrusting into her, his huge arms wrapped around her? Would he even see her under this hunk of a man? Still, he was curious. To see her taken by someone else. Was she different with him? More demure? Submissive? Or was she unapologetically taking what she wanted?

He'd taken a few silent steps toward the door without thinking. She screamed Kai’s name over and over. She must have been close again. Another two steps and he could see the light through the crack. If he focused hard he could make them out, two shapes made into one, Kai thrusting into her from behind, her face buried inside a pillow. Now he could make out Kai’s grunting and see the glistening beats of sweat trailing down his muscled form. Would he be able to hold on a little longer or would he come? Inside or on her back? Atticus thought of his white ropes on her. Her face, her breasts, her ass. All marking her as his. He had to palm himself through the pants because the aching was unbearable. His cock wanted nothing more than to break out and join. To hammer into her. Y/N came screaming Kai’s name. As she did, she looked up from the pillow. Right into Atticus’ eyes. He'd inadvertently made another step towards the door. He froze, unable to think of anything to do as she held his gaze with a smirk. She licked her lips absentmindedly. Kai followed her eyes as he noticed her attention was no longer on him, not completely at least.

Atticus had expected the man to be angry, to shout at him to leave them alone. Instead, he had the biggest, laziest grin on his face as he slowed his pace, now pounding into her slowly, savouring every movement. “You know you’re free to join us, right?”, he was a little out of breath but his voice was calm, like Atticus hadn’t just interrupted them during the most intimate moment imaginable. Kai’s one hand played with her backside, her ass, the spot where he disappeared into her, her asshole. Atticus felt a pang of rage and jealousy. That sweet spot he’d caressed so many times with his tongue felt, more than any other part of her, like his. Kai’s other hand slowly made its way up her body. Along her smooth skin, now slightly wet, kneading her breasts, caressing her face. Atticus realized Kai didn’t try to be possessive, he was inviting him in, showing him all the places on her that were still empty.

“I…I couldn’t, I”, Atticus stammered eloquently. Never before had he felt so much like a fool. He wanted to run, to hide away from the shame he felt. Until she said his name. “Atticus.” It was barely more than a whisper, but the need in her voice drove him crazy. He'd never been able to say no to her when she’d said his name like that. She could have anything she wanted when she said his name and he would forever give her anything he had, anything he was, just so she’d never stop saying it. “Look at that pretty mouth. All empty.” Kai’s voice was an irresistible purr now. As if in a trance, Atticus walked towards the bed, towards their eager, hungry eyes. Y/N’s gaze darted from his eyes down to the obvious bulge in her pants and she licked her lips in anticipation. She was so hungry, so desperate for him, to fill her up. As he stood at the end of the bed, Y/N reached out to cup him. His eyes closed involuntarily. And when he opened them again, she’d taken him out. His cock looked huge in her small hands and it twitched like a wild animal. He gazed along her body toward where the other man was buried inside her. The gap between them was shorter than he’d anticipated. If he’d wanted, he could hunch over and kiss him. But he lost his train of thought as Y/N’s mouth slowly descended onto him and her hand kneaded his balls. “Oh, you’re going to love this.”, Kai said, as he began thrusting into her. Slowly at first, matching the pace she set working on devouring Atticus’ cock.

He was right. Of course, Atticus has had his fingers in her mouth several times when he’d thrust into her. Or his cock in her mouth as she came on his tongue. But this was something different altogether. This was heaven. He could feel her moans reverberating from his tip all through his body. Every one of Kai’s lazy thrusts sent another wave of pleasure along her and into him. Y/N had always been good at taking him, but now it was like she didn’t even want to breathe. Again and again he hit the back of her throat, burying himself in that wetness, her teeth lightly crazing his sensitive skin. She chased him every time he moved back, her tongue greedily licking his shaft whenever he took a short break. He’d thought she’d been ravenous before, but this was something else. Saliva mixed with his own slick coated her throat, her lips, fell down in drops before she could swallow them. After a while, he realized it wasn’t her setting the pace anymore, neither was it Kai. It was Atticus. Every time he thrust back into her mouth, the other man followed. He wasn’t even sure, if Y/N had any breaks between her orgasms or if she only felt one gigantic bout of extasy. “God, you’re so tight, princess. You’re doing so well.” Kai’s words unexpectedly sent Atticus over the edge. He exploded into Y/N’s mouth before he could stop himself. He couldn’t even scream her name, his thoughts were so jumbled. And she swallowed every last drop of him without complaint. The only thing he could see in her glazed eyes was pure bliss. Once he was completely spent, she let him go with a lewd pop that sent shivers down his spine. But instead of letting him go, she caressed the top of his legs, kissing and biting his abdomen.

“I think our little princess is spent.”, Kai said with a small laugh. Y/N didn’t speak. She just hummed in agreement. Kai stopped thrusting and just stayed inside her. “Don’t you want to-“ Atticus was surprised by how exhausted he sounded. His voice almost didn’t feel like his own. “No need. I’m sure I will have ample opportunity to fill her up over the next two weeks.”, Kai said with a wink and Atticus could feel himself blushing slightly. What? Atticus Noble didn’t blush. Slowly, Kai slid out of Y/N, who commented with a mumble that sounded exhausted, but a little disappointed. “I need a shower. She climbed me the second I got off the ship.” He slapped her ass and she winced. He got off the bed with a groan and Atticus hoped he hadn’t noticed how Atticus’ stare had lingered on his still hard cock for a second. “You take care of her for me until I get back.” Kai patted him on the shoulder hard, like they were the best of mates, like they hadn’t just shared the same woman, and left for the bathroom.

Y/N was on her knees and visibly shaking from exhaustion. Atticus went to the bedside table and gave her a glass of water from the carafe that had conveniently been placed there. “Thanks.”, her voice was so hoarse, he could barely understand her. Then he helped tuck her into the bed since she was shivering. But he didn’t join. That was for Kai to do when he came back. Instead, Atticus went to his knees on the side of the bed and stroked her hair. He pressed a soft kiss on her temple and wiped some of the saliva away that was still coating her jaw. The weak smile she gave him made him want to crawl right up in bed with her. Another time. Still shaky, she put a hand on his cheeks. “I love you, Atticus.” “I love you, Y/N.” She had been right. The first time he’d said these words, they hadn’t been true. He had been obsessed with her and the way she had made him feel. But now, after everything they had been together, the war, the pain, he meant it. If this wasn’t love, then he didn’t want whatever the hell it was.

[yowyowyaoi]

Itachi's Daily Texts from the Akatsuki, Part Two

From Kakuzu

Won't be as effective if you don't get some damn sleep.

You need to stay off of it for at least a week. I'll explain to Nagato.

How you choose to live (and die) is your own business.

Well tell him to take it easy with you. Your stamina isn't up for "extracurricular activities" like that, brat.

I'm aware. I'll deal with him later.

If you don't wish to pay it then use a candle instead of that lamp.

Once again, GO TO BED.

Your sweets consumption is appalling.

Of the three of you, I'm not sure which one worries me more. Four counting Tobi.

A gengetsu where all I have to do is sit still and money flies into my lap. Birthday present.

Your worst is likely STILL superior to his "best".

Rent is due. Utilities as well.

From Sasori

I swear your stubbornness rivals even that of Deidara's sometimes.

I'm working on a new remedy that should still the pain for much longer periods of time.

If you don't take better care of it I'll be forced to amputate. And as a warning, once I start with body modifications I find it very, very hard to stop.

SLEEP.

With as bad as your breathing sounds? The enemy would hear you coming from a mile away!

Eternal doesn't mean eternal patience.

I told him to behave himself with you or I'll take away his clay.

I wish I could help more. I truly do, child.

My thanks for the book, I'll return it within the week.

I'll admit I've thought about it but I'm not sure the sharingan would translate as well aesthetically in wood as it does in human flesh.

From Hidan

Prove it.

Mine's shorter but it's better. Not so greasy.

You'd be healed from everything if you just prayed to Jashin!!

It's a. Fucking. Fishing pole. He has like fifty! Why's he making such a big deal out of ONE?!

I did it and I'm NOT sorry.

Shit ain't my business but really isn't he too big for your sick-ass body?

Can't even tell you man.

It's not my deal but blondie looks cute as fuck when we go. Tell him I said that and I'll cut off your balls with my scythe.

You're like a fucking vampire dude. You NEVER SLEEP!

When I tried saying it Kakuzu almost knocked my head off my damn neck.

Stop being so gay and come with us. It's not like you've got shit else to do that day!

Whatever asshole.

I would rock your fucking world and I wouldn't break your ass in half like shark-dick.

Just use your creepy eyes and put him to sleep first! All we gotta do is cut off like two inches and he'll freak so bad he'll have a heart attack!

You know what? I'm gonna lend you my Jashin bible. One you read it you'll see I'm right about everything I keep telling you!

From Zetsu

You hurt his feelings, child. He said you're the only ones left of your clan and you never wish to spend time with or even speak to him.

I can smell it coming from your pores.

Time is merely an illusion.

These trips to Konoha are proving quite lengthy ...

You should probably lay low for a bit. Kakuzu finally received the credit card bill for all of those tea and dango shops.

That's a lovely idea but I doubt ALL of us could go to one place without causing some chaos.

There is no heaven and no hell. There is simply NOW, and whatever realities we choose to create for ourselves.

I believe he's started to think of himself as being your "big brother". Could be either good or bad for you.

From Deidara

Art absolutely IS a "life necessity". Heathen.

As good as friends as two assholes can be, right?

Mine got softer since I started using the eggs. It's slimy but after it sets in, it's really great.

If I wasn't goofy about Danna and EVERY OTHER man in the world died, then maybe.

Should you really be drinking?

Maybe if you went to sleep! Fucking hell you're creepier than a vampire!

Yeah but if I DID like girls I bet I'd get more than you!

I just don't get why he wears it? He's hot as FUCK without it.

Would Kisame get mad if I asked him if he wanted to come with us to the aquarium?

Just get Konan to do it. She's nice and has soft hands.

Hidan wants to but I'd rather stay home.

Yeah I could teach you but yours wouldn't explode so what's even the point??

From Konan

Thank you! I can't believe you noticed! <3

You need the fresh air, come with me for a walk.

Don't listen to him ok?

Yes and no. More so "yes".

I wish I had the time for it.

I'm almost done with that book, you have the sequel right?

It's like every single particle of dust on the road just magically finds it's way into my hair.

If you're trying to avoid back pain, I'd advise against it.

Not that I don't appreciate them but ... did you go out at one in the morning to pick them?

He talks too loud and I've already got a headache.

Thanks for letting me borrow it, Nagato's hair is much healthier now.

From Tobi/Obito

You think THAT was bad?? Try BATHING the son of a bitch!!

You, me, and Sasuke could do it though. It would be more powerful than any clan that ever existed.

Just because it tasted good did NOT mean you needed to eat that many in one sitting!

I applaud the idea but with as weak as you are right now I don't see how it could work.

He's taller than you now. Still with the short hair though.

I can see I was wrong in criticizing Fugaku's parenting style because you ARE a handful, little cousin.

Four hours of uninterrupted sleep would do you a world of good.

Why should I give that up?? It's absurdity to think that an UCHIHA has a PUPPET as a romantic rival!!

It gets so hot and itchy under this thing.

A vacation somewhere warm and quiet would be nice.

Your idea of atonement is even more fucked-up than mine.

No but HE said I had to.

I'm honestly surprised nobody has tried to kill him yet.

I wish it was so. I truly do.

It's loud but you have to admit it's better than being alone.

Come and eat.

Depends on what your definition of "helpful" is.

From Kisame

Did you eat something yet?

Did you get any sleep last night?

Come here, I drew you a bath with lavender oil.

Can I help that I legitimately worry over you?

Just a snack? Just so you have something in your stomach? Please?

The water is warm and gentle and I bet a swim would cheer you up.

I forgot how much energy they have, I ran myself ragged trying to keep up with them!

Then come let me brush that beautiful hair of yours.

I understand. I don't agree but I get it.

Then just let me kill them. Problem solved.

Come on, please, just one quick little nap. An hour max.

They invited us but I know you don't really like red meat so I said no.

Fortunately MY bed is VERY warm and cozy. Come and see.

It might shock you to learn that there are other foods besides dango and tea.

You shouldn't even have to ask, that was 1000% Deidara.

There are other, and perhaps more interesting, ways of building your stamina. <3

Never imagined that one day I'd want something like this, but here we are.

Is it a little one or a big one? If it's small just take a deep breath and use your shoe.

I love you as well but dammit brat you'll be the death of me for sure!

[shitpunsforshitnuns]

OBSESSED with the fact that the infamous “gross American food” poll is fully just poor people food that people still make/buy either because it was passed through their family or because they’re still poor. Allow me to elaborate. Here’s the poll if you’ve managed to avoid the discourse:

American Chocolate tastes different because of two factors: the majority of our cacao comes from South America unlike Europe which generally imports from Africa (moving product farther costs more money). Also, American chocolate is only required to have 10% cacao as opposed to Europe’s 20% (using less cacao and supplementing with readily available sweeteners like corn syrup costs less money). In fact, the very first American Chocolate company (Baker Chocolate Company) was so aware of how much less wealthy the early US was than Europe’s established market for chocolate, that their bars came with a money back guarantee for anyone who was disappointed with the sweets. The current financial situation in the US is well known to the rest of the world- of course we still make and eat cheap chocolate, the bones of our country are exploitation. Also, the dairy content is lower in American chocolates which makes them more shelf stable. Shelf stable foods are important for communities living paycheck to paycheck who have money for a chocolate bar right now but won’t for their kid’s birthday in a week.

Bologna feels self explanatory to me. It’s made of literal scraps from the meat production industry that are then turned into a “sausage” and cured to give the product more longevity. I like fried bologna because it was cheaper for my dad’s parents when he was a kid. My dad likes bologna for the same reason.

Watergate Salad is made of shelf stable ingredients. Many desserts require eggs or dairy that can be expensive and expire quickly. Those desserts then get stale if they aren’t eaten immediately. Canned fruits, pistachio pudding mix, and cool whip (which is hydrogenated oil and very little dairy) will all keep for a while. You can buy them in bulk and put them in your cabinets or freezer until you want to use them and then the salad itself will keep in the fridge. See again the importance of shelf stable foods to impoverished communities.

Twinkies are cheap and go stale slowly. See again the importance of shelf stable foods in impoverished communities.

Grits, Boiled Peanuts, and Biscuits and Gravy are all southern comfort food staples. I was born and raised in north Georgia, it’s very important to me to note that almost all southern food was co-opted from freed slaves by poor rural white folk in the south. Plain grits can be deeply unappetizing but they are cheap and self stable. You can add butter and salt or even seasoned meat and veggies. Grits are rarely a whole meal all to themselves and when they are you add some cheese or salt at the very least. George Washington Carver (a black man many people outside of Georgia should acquaint themselves with at least a little better) turned peanuts into a massive cash crop in Georgia because they are nitrogen fixing! They replace the nitrogen other cash crops (like cotton and tobacco) take out of the soil. In order for your fields to stay viable, you have to plant something like this every once in a while, so most farmers had peanuts themselves or had a neighbor growing peanuts. Boiling them is a quick, easy way to get salt on the nuts themselves. The water soaks through the shells and seasons and softens the nuts. Water is free and peanuts will keep until the fats start to go south, no wonder they picked up popularity among rural folk and travelers alike. Biscuits and gravy are another scrap food. A good sausage gravy is made of leftover sausage and southern biscuits are a savory, buttery carb that is filling and gives you energy you need somewhere like a farm. The negative stereotypes of the south are pervasive and often rooted in racism. Find someone whose grandma has been making these foods her whole life before you form an opinion.

Meatloaf is seasoned more often than not. Like. Sorry you ate meatloaf that wasn’t salted. Anyway, meatloaf is another scrap food! Meat scraps are ground up and then formed into a loaf. Most people put tomato sauce or ketchup on it. Canned tomato products are, you guessed it, shelf stable, and can also be canned at home fairly safely.

The United States at large is not ignorant of the world around it. We are aware that other foods exist. Either we are choosing to eat these or our financial situations are backing us into corners. This is all without even touching upon the prevalence of food deserts in low-income, minority communities in the US. If you’re aware of all this and you really just want to critique the wealth disparity in the US, punch up. Go after the guys with money, not the food that the rest of us find joy in making out of the scraps. Also, making fun of the British is always punching up. Maybe if you had caused fewer wealth disparities that directly impacted the food eaten in other countries, we would be nicer about yours.

[simonxriley]

WIP WEDNESDAY

I was tagged by the wonderful @nightbloodbix, thank you! 💜

taglist (opt in/out) @playstationmademe @r6shippingdelivery @inafieldofdaisies @illmetbymoonlight @voidika @carlosoliveiraa @captmactavish @alexxmason @shegetsburned @statichvm @cloudofbutterflies92 @dickytwister @chloekistune @leviiackrman @killerspinal @collinnmckinley @carrionsflower

Still working on the next chapter for 'when the world falls', I'm still planning on getting it done soon-ish.

“I know.” She sighed, sprawling back onto the bed like a starfish. “I just hate that I got injured over my stupidity.” 

“It wasn’t stupid. I could've done the exact same thing.” 

“You’re just saying that to be nice.” 

“No, I’m telling you the truth. It wasn’t stupid, maybe it was just unlucky.” 

She scoffed and sat up again. “Yeah. Why couldn’t the unlucky one be my brother?” 

He looked over at her, blinking his eyes a few times. She could tell he didn’t know how to answer that question and it made her laugh. “Don’t worry it was a rhetorical question.”

“Okay good. I had no idea on how to answer that.” 

“I could tell.” She laughs. “I would give all my bad luck to Hesh if I could.”

“If you put your mind to it, I’m sure you’ll be able to.” 

She looked over at him, blinking her eyes a few times as she contemplated his words. Then a smile grew on her lips until she bursted out laughing. “If it was only that easy.” 

“Yeah, that might be hard to do. But I did get you to laugh, so I say a job well done.” 

“Did you just compliment yourself?” She laughed, going quiet a moment later and softly sighed. “Thank you though!” 

“You’re welcome, love!” He gave her a genuine smile, something she has grown very fond of. “Maybe a little.” 

She brought her knees up to her chest and softly smiled. Out of all the teams she could’ve been reassigned too, she was happy it was the one-four-one. Not everyone would be like Simon, kind. 

“I knew it.” She laughed. “You wanna get some breakfast? I’m hungry.”

“Sure. I haven’t eaten yet either.” 

They both got up from their beds and headed towards the mess hall. Even before they got there, they could hear the abundance of voices from the soldiers coming from the room. She did wonder who was in there though, wondering if it was anyone she knew. She hoped not, unless it was someone she liked. 

The place wasn’t as packed as she thought it was going to be, the noise coming from the room made it sound like a lot more people were here. Then again it could’ve just been the echos. She scanned the room as they made their way to grab their food. 

Liz opted for her usual, scrambled eggs, bacon, a piece of toast and a cup of fruit. Though she would love some pancakes right about now. Something different instead of the same old same old that comes with every military base she’s been at. 

Simon got pretty much the exact same thing as her, but with sausage instead of bacon. 

They made their way to a nearby table to sit down and eat their breakfast, before she could fully sit down a familiar voice caught her ear. She stood up, looking around to find him. That’s when she saw him two tables down with Merrick and unfortunately Hesh. 

She chuckled and sat back down. 

“What was that about?” 

“Oh, I just heard Keegan, I was wondering where he was.” She softly laughed. “He’s quiet so hearing his voice sometimes is a shock.”

“You looked suspicious so I had to ask.” 

“Suspicious?” 

He gave a vague gesture with his hand and shrugged his shoulders. “I don’t know, you had that look you were about to punch someone.”  

Her mouth slightly fell open, she wasn’t sure if she should be proud or worried that he was already getting to know her facial expressions. That could be trouble in the long run. 

“I’m not sure what to say to that.” She laughed nervously. “We haven’t known each other that long and you’ve already figured out some of my facial expressions. Kind of.” 

[friendly-reject]

✼　 ҉ ✼ DORM SHENANIGANS ✼　 ҉ ✼

BNHA x Gn!reader

Warnings: Swearing, mild violence, mineta existing

¤゜゜・．.・゜゜・・゜゜・．.・¤

~Third POV~

It was the second week in the dorms, you had all settled in nicely, it was around 9am and everyone was awake, well except for you. You were passed out on your bedroom floor, seeing as you were up all night doing God knows what you were quite worn out so now you're just spread out on the black rug on your floor. Sleeping was ni- *BANG BANG BANG*, "WHAT THE FU-" You shot up instantly in a confused and agitated state, "OI DUMBASS GET UP, THOSE IDIOTS CAN'T COOK FOR SHIT AND I REFUSE TO TEACH THEIR USELESS ASSES" Bakugou screamed at you behind your door as you got up, flipped him off and got dressed.

Grabbing your phone and your Bluetooth headphones you pocketed both/ your phone and layed your headphones around the back of your neck. Exiting your dorm and closing the door as you rubbed the sleep from your eyes making your way to the kitchen area. "Alright, what'd you idiots need help with aga-" , you paused seeing the disaster the kitchen was in "Oh God what the hell, WHAT THE HELL IS THIS??" You panicked wondering how a group of UA students could mess up such an easy life skill, some mystery food was very much charcoal burnt, Midoriya was crying and Momo was clearly about to have a breakdown. " I just wanted our c-class to have a g-group breakfasSSSTT" She spoke to herself as she suddenly burst into tears. You ran upto her looking/up/down at her tearfilled eyes and awkwardly embraced her as chaos ran through the dorm, "Heyy, it's alright I have half decent cooking skills so I'm sure I'll be able to salvage whatever they were exactly aiming to make" You cringed as you spoke trying your best to not want to hurl than and there. "Alright, everyone OUT, I need this space for a whole hour and NO ONE interrupting me either please and thank you", You spoke clapping your hands and quickly got to work cleaning up before starting to cook.

Mesmerised by your efficiency in the kitchen Midoriya, Kirishima, Mineta and Hagakure stared at you with amazement and pure joy.

With such extreme focus you prepared a breakfast to feed your entire class and left-overs, of course you didn't need to but you wanted to. You enjoyed/didn't enjoy cooking but/so you were happy to help with breakfast/ you did enjoy making sure your class was taken care of so you cooked anyway. "Food's ready! Come eat!" You called out towards your dorm mates as they all started rushing in like a stampede. You had prepared a variety of foods, ranging from hardy brunch or light smooth sides. "OH WOW! THIS LOOKS DELICIOUS L/N" Hagakure says with joy as you laugh and scratch the back of your neck "Thank you and you all know I prefer my first name even if we all aren't extremely close?" You respond nonchalantlly, feeling uncomfortable with people calling you by your last name even if it was respectful. "Oh right! Thank you for the meal!" Everyone but Bakugou shouts and bows their heads as they all start plating their food. Grabbing your own plate you sit down at one of the far left tables. Sitting just across from bakugou he snarled at you "Oi Q/B/N (quirk based nickname) what the hell are you doing?", He glared at you with egg hanging from his chopsticks, "Chill out Bakugou, I'm still tired I don't feel like making conversations with the others" You called back at him, stuffing your face with rice. 4 other plates slam down next to both of you. Sero, Mina, Kirishima and Kaminari accompanied you all chatting and eating.

You spaced out with food still in your mouth, Bakugou nudged your shin with his foot, shaking your head you swallowed your food, "Hm?" You tilted your head at him as he nudged his head towards Mineta harassing Ojiro and Deku. You gripped your chopsticks "What does this grape fuck want with them?" You stood up and slammed down your chopsticks, walking towards them but being stopped by Bakugou with him putting a hand just infront of your stomach, you glared at him but he only stared at the three of them leaving you confused but a flow of admiration gushed against you when you saw Ojiro himself grab mineta and throw him against a wall, "You're really annoying mineta, but atleast I was gentle" He said sitting back down and continuing his meal. You clapped your hands and sat back down also to continue eating, "Ya know, some of these idiots aren't that bad, but that doesn't mean I like anyone here!" Bakugou chirped at you while you chuckled in response "Yea yea, I know, so how's the food?" You asked sparking conversation, "It's decent, a little light in my opinion, besides I like spicy food alot more than regular food." He responded, you nodded  understanding his point of view "Oi, are you doing anything today Q/B/N? God knows these extras are more mindless than sheep" He questioned you, you and Kirishima definitely got along with Bakugou more than the rest of the class did with him. "Yea, I'm picking up my costume from Power Loader and Hatsume, got it fixed and added some simple support items nothing big but still took longer than normal adjustments" You explained as he took in the information "I'm coming with you extra" He spat at you,"I- You're what? Why?" You retorted in confusion, "BECAUSE I SAID SO NERD!" He shot up and yelled,picked up his finished plate to go wash it and went to get ready. "Damn Bakuhoe what's your deal" You whispered as you also went to clean your dishes. Mina and Kaminari started crying laughing once they heard your comeback "God Y/N that name was ge-", as you put your plate in the sink you noticed something, "WHO IN GODS NAME BURNT THE PAN THIS BADLY?!?" Your voice rang in everyone's ears. "Oh shit" Kaminari sweat dropped "I'm screwed" He squeaked out as he ran for his dorm. "Y/N NO" the class shouted, "GET YOUR ASS BACK HERE, I BOUGHT THAT PAN"  You ran after him.

Ah yes, another day in the 1A dorms.

¤゜゜・．.・゜゜・・゜゜・．.・¤

Hope you enjoyed :]]

[astrorabby]

I beat Pikmin 4 with no upgrades

Over the past couple weeks or so I've been playing Pikmin 4 again. First a normal playthrough, which reminded me of how much Oatchi invalidates what the game throws at you.

So I figured, what if I didn't upgrade Oatchi at all? Then I took it a step further and decided not to upgrade my explorer, whomst I named Terri, either. [I DID have to buy the scorch guards to enter Frozen Inferno but I unequipped it right after I entered] I hardly bought any items, just a few bombs for some concrete walls, and, admittedly i had bombs to kill the Empress Bulblax in the Cavern for a King. I can't kill her properly even WITH an fully powered dog, I'll admit.

The results were disappointing. I knew the early game wouldn't be much different, but later wasn't much harder either. The only treasure past a pup tunnel is early on and only has a weight of 3, Oatchi's default strength. I was legitimately looking forward to, say, spending twenty minutes rushing into a 4 weight treasure over and over again to push it off a ledge, but alas no such obstacle occured.

The only parts to give me trouble were later dandori chllanges, the later night missions, and the Ancient Sirehound.

The dandori challenges were interesting, the early ones were easy sure, I platinumed the first one at least. Some, like Hefty Haulway proved quite difficult; not being able to use Oatchi to pick up some slack on that crimson banquet makes it hard to even get a bronze. Cliff-Hanger's Hold requires a lot of Oatchi's abilities to smoothly take on the upper level. Even a midly upgraded Oatchi comes in handy in Oasis of Order to immediately move the love nugget behind the start to get some extra whites, or to get the poison bulborb and/or the foolish fruit across that small creek, freeing up the wingeds to get the materials ASAP.

Speaking of whites, I actually used White Pikmin in more than one spot. I typically buy the poison armor for Oatchi ASAP, making whites very redundant, and with the onion confined to a special challenge unlocked after beating another special challenge, I often don't want to risk my white min. Since I never got the poison armor, I had no choice but to use the whities liberally; I was still very careful with them. Often restarting a whole floor upon losing just one.

The Night Missions weren't too kind. The early ones were fine and really no different, but the two in the Primordial Thicket were tough. Particularly the very final one, Autumnal Gully. Oatchi cannot glowmob, and with no upgrades, his rush doesn't stun. And you can't leave Oatchi alone for long, he will still autoattack, and with no armor or HP upgrades he dies near instantly upon a lumiknoll attack. Plus, one of the progg eggs seems to be inaccessible so I'd have to take on that progg no matter what. I resolved to collecting as many pellets as I could, getting to about 70 glow pikmin, leaving Oatchi on the blue lumiknoll and Terri on the orange. Terri being on the orange was imperitive to stun the baldy long-legs that approaches it. With plenty of spicy-spray it turned out not so bad, but it took way more concious planning than any night mission did with upgrades.

Then came the Ancient Sirehound. As I always do, I abused glow pikmin for this fight; glowies for the hazards, purps for the tail. The ice phase always give me trouble, trying to run to his tail with those snowballs rolling is a pain. But the breath wasn't a problem, until now. Get rolled into the breath and your pikmin are frozen, Oatchi is frozen, you're…not frozen. It does enough damage to kill an unupgraded explorer in one hit. Oatchi just barely survives.

The electric phase is a lot tougher, you can't just mosey on through the beams, you gotta dodge and jump them while making sure your glow pikmin go where you want, which with targeting isn't usually a problem until it randomly auto-targets the Sirehound, but many people have [rightfully] griped about the auto-target in this game so I'll spare you.

Fire phase was pretty normal. Even with the scorch guard i'd instinctively jump over the waves of fire…only this time it matters if I miss. But that didn't happen much.

Progg phase is always frustrating. The lack of HP and armor upgrades doesn't make a difference, sure you die in fewer hits but touching that stuff always kills so many pikmin its basically always a reset, anyway.

I didn't platinum the dandori challenges. I may attempt to but it may not be possible for some. Oatchi throating the banquet in Hefty Haulway seemed imperative for that one when I platinumed it, for instance. I didn't do the Sage Leaf because it's impossible to avoid Moss upgrades in the shipwreck tale, though I may do it for the sake of it. Who knows, maybe I'll find a way to do the shipwreck tale without even discovering Moss.

[sunnysideaeggs]

Do you have an Aegon headcanon to share?

Omg I have many! Probably some of them I have read here and can’t remember who posted them (credits to them ofc) but here’s some:

Aegon is a great singer, ofc (both TGC and Ty are musicians, and Tom has an especially sweet voice). He probably sings to Sunfyre, to confort his children, and when he’s alone.

TGC’s band, Sleepwalking animals, has a song called Wild folk and I think is very much Aegon coded! He sings about being lost and seeking pleasure, then wanting to run away with a lover. It’s very in line with Egg having a smallfolk!lover and I’m here for it.

He’s bi. In my mind all of Alicent’s children are bi, but only he knows it for now, because he’s the only one open about it (Hel is ace and biromantic, Aemond is too closed up and Daeron is too young yet) but they’ll get there.

His favorite child is Jaehaera. He loves all his children, in his flawled way, but he likes her the most. She’s just like Helaena. He’s a girl dad honestly. It adds an additional layer of pain when she winds up being his last child.

Speaking of Hel, I think that he loves her in a brotherly way. He probably thinks he had to marry her to protect her (they can’t afford to send her away from them with a lord in a strange land) and they have the most sibling-like relationship in Targ marriage history.

When Helaena gave birth to the twins (a writing crime tbh, she was 13-14), he stood terrified outside the room and threatened the maesters to not hurt her and take care of her. He left her to recover for a while (that’s why there’s 4 years between the twins and Maelor).

I love TGC’s idea of Aegon having a lover in KL. Man has his own oc and fanfiction and I trust him about Egg matters more than Condal and Hess tbh.

Songs that remind me of him are Colors by Halsey, Mama by My chemical romance, Can you feel my heart by BMTH and Heroin by Lana del Rey. Yes he’s an emo.

He calls Criston ‘dad’ bc he’s his dad ofc. If he’s ever on trouble, he either calls him or Aemond.

I have said this before, but he’s really charismatic! He makes easy friends but can’t really ‘connect’ with them. I would’ve loved to see the greens as really politically savvy (for their own different abilities) and him being a Bobby B like king makes sense to me.

In a modern world, he would study communication (I’m projecting here bc I study comm but hear me out) @daddyissuesinwesteros has said he would be a successful tiktoker, and he would! But I think his family would pressure him into getting a *real* job and degree. He already changed his major once (Business to Admin, then dropped) and he’s 22, so he gets into communication. He has average grades at best, but he likes some subjects and makes some useful friends, he tries okay 😵‍💫

Modern au again, he’s the type of guy that dedicates Playboi Carti songs and believes it’s the most romantic thing ever. Idk, I got Fell in luv dedicated once and it’s something he would do(? mid.

He, from the first to the last day of his reign, valued Alicent’s advice and actively asked for it. This is partially why she had so much influence in the Dance, and why she wholeheartedly believed she could prevent war by counseling him. He also asks Helaena about many matters, not only government.

He’s an aqua sun (like Tom 🥳), taurus or capricorn moon, pisces rising.

If Targs believed in reincarnation, he is Rhaenys Targaryen (the first one) reborn. He’s pretty, he likes to party and he flies in Sunfyre a lot. I also think that Aemond (at least show wise) is Vaegon’s reincarnation.

I think he’s pretty wise, at least when it comes to what the IT really means just as GRRM intended. He sees the throne as a duty, not as a right, and knows he doesn’t have the necessary skills to rule. I think is refreshing for a character to acknowledge what a poison the IT really means and how it corrupts (or is corrupted by) those who desire it.

He really was paranoid about cutting himself on the throne, so he wore armor and never was really ‘comfortable’ while sitting on it. I have a few more hcs about the throne and how it’s *alive* regarding Vizzy, Egg and Rhae, so maybe I’ll make a separate post about it.

Can’t talk about Egg without talking about Sunfyre, so I will add: Sun and him definitely had the most amazing dragon-rider bond in all of history. I think that translates in both Sunfyre being more ‘human’ than most dragons, having above average intelligence (hiding, fighting and winning while wounded require more than brawn) and Aegon surviving in mere willpower, because he was getting Sun’s energy in a way. When he died, I think that willpower left him and yk.

Speaking of yk, he planned it. No Larys, no Corlys (and for the love of the seven it wasn’t Alicent!). I think life just cornered him too much and it became unbearable.

I really like his figure as the first non 100% Valyrian king (the ones before him had only Targ/Velaryon blood) and being the first that gave a damn about long term planning. He, intentionally or unintentionally drafted the rules of succession for the IT (in my mind they’re called Egg’s rules, just like Rhaenys’ rule of six), which is more than the previous kings did, ensuring a crystal clear (but unfair and sexist) inheritance that worked fine for a couple centuries.

I think I made this too long, hope they make sense and aren’t too random/hyperspecific 😵‍💫 I also subscribe to some hcs other blogs have, but tried to write about things that haven’t been explored yet!

[greatbigbellies]

2023 PREGNANCY KINK ADVENT CALENDAR (DAY 2)

Secret Surrogate: 1st Trimester.

So, my counselor advised I take up journaling, so I’m giving it a shot here. She says it’ll help me get my thoughts and experiences down so I don’t linger on them so much. She’s the expert so, here we go I guess.

I suppose I’ll just get into it, since I have something really exciting but also really stressful going on. I’m surrogating for my best friend! She and her husband (lovely guy!) have wanted kids for a while now, but unfortunately my friend has some health issues that make carrying a pregnancy very unsafe for her. We talked, and made a lot of plans, and contacted the appropriate agencies and everything is above board and got greenlit!

The fertilized egg took without an issue, and now I’m proudly 11 weeks pregnant as of this writing! I’m really excited just thinking about it, helping my friend with the family she’s wanted since we met, and of course I get the proud title of god parent after the baby is born!

That also, though, kind of brings me to my trouble and stress surrounding the situation. I work a good job, part of a huge office complex, many coworkers, most of whom I am neutral toward, if I don’t like them outright. That said… there is a penchant for gossip to spread quickly, and some of the folks vying for promotions can be… very judgy.

Why am I beating around the bush? This is a journal for crying out loud. I have a coworker who recently had a baby, she’s the sweetest woman, slightly younger then me. Unfortunately, it was pretty common knowledge that she was, and still is, single. And so, when she started showing, some pretty negative opinions of her started circulating. A lot of water cooler chat about how she was “easy” and “must have gotten around a lot”, really hurtful stuff. What was really insidious was how no one actually told her that these rumors were going around until I said something, and by then it has been months, and I assumed she already knew… I felt really bad (that was a very awkward brunch…), and if I’d known I would have told her much sooner. 

The problem was so widespread that if HR were to have reprimanded the people who engaged with it, they would have been dolling out punishments for nearly two whole departments. Frankly I think they should have, but I’m all too aware that the bureaucracy machines moves too slowly to catch them all. My coworker is on maternity leave now, seems to be doing well, I check up on her when I can. With everything that happened, I’m not sure if she truly intends to come back, or if she’s just juicing them for that leave PTO. I’d miss her if she left but wouldn’t blame her in the slightest.

But now, here I am, surrogating for my friend, and I know I’ve told a few coworkers that I’m not seeing anyone… I’m worried it’ll hit me too. I could obviously just tell them the truth but I’m not sure if they would believe me. Some of them are so eager to judge… I’m not very tall either, 5’2”, so I’m going to show and probably get pretty big. Thankfully, I have one hail mary pass.

The company has been talking about renovating the office building we work out of for years now. We’re talking big, sweeping overhauls to almost every floor. Obviously they can’t just have people NOT work and they’re trying to avoid layoffs as much as possible, so the plan for when that hits is to have everyone work form home! By some miracle, the renovations start right as I’m about to hit 20 weeks, and are so massive that they plan to take almost 5 months! So my plan is to basically dress loosely to hide… well, everything, and use my backlog of paid time off as a form of parental leave to recover after giving birth. I can frame the PTO use as a vacation, bounce back, and return to work slim, trim, and NOT pregnant, my best friend gets her baby, and no one is the wiser!

The big reason I’m bending over so far backwards for this is, one of the most vocally judgy people from the incident with my coworker also happens to be the one who works the position above mine that I really, really want. Apparently they intend to work through the holidays next year to reap the christmas bonus and then retire, and they get to name their successor. They aren’t the most kind, and I wouldn’t put it past them to cast aspersions on my character and select someone else for that job based on my perceived “bastard pregnancy”. They’re a jerk, but they’d get away with it. If I want that position, I need to keep it under wraps.

It sucks too, I like the attention pregnant people get. It’s supposed to be a special, positive thing, and it should be for me too. All my family and friends are very excited and proud, but it sucks my work life has to be so isolated from it. I’ll live, but as my pregnancy progresses, I suspect I’ll be venting a lot here.

I admittedly have some things to vent about it already. The morning sickness has been very unpleasant, and I’m experiencing a noticeable amount of bloating. You’re not supposed to need bigger clothes until later, right? My usual pants already feel tight. I’ve also been getting cravings, pretty intense ones. If things persist like this through the next 29 weeks, those poor guys down at the taco bell are going to get really sick of seeing me. But baby gets what baby wants… I just wish baby didn’t want dirt quality burritos.

Aside from that, I’m just attending regular doctor visits. Everything looks healthy, and I hope it stays that way! Fingers crossed I can hit full term and be induced before they call me back in for a meeting…

[eggluttony]

Beach episode?

Boom Egg likes taking his fat boys to the beach and always makes sure they go shirtless and they agree if he will too. This results in Boom Egg showing off his fit toned body he's been working on despite his shyness to do so, while modern and Casino Egg's massive bellies are on full display and wobbling and jiggling as they walk, which they can range from feeling proud of showing off as they feel very sexy to a little embarrassed if they've gotten even fatter over the previous months and going out showing more skin really puts it into perspective how much fatter they've gotten over the past few months.

The fatties just wear beach shorts with a huge waist and super stretchy waistband so they can be comfortable with all their fat spilling over them but they convince Boom Egg to wear something much more revealing like a speedo or something which he's not absolutely not confident enough to wear but they really want it so he gives in. However he wears shorts on top of them for a while and they have to plead him to take them off so they can see. When he does he's so embarrassed, especially when they can't resist slapping his little round butt cheeks but he's also flattered by being desired.

First things first, they have to apply sunscreen. Modern and Casino Egg need Boom Egg to help because their bodies are so massive, they can't reach all the areas they need to apply with their huge bellies in the way and the sheet span of their fat. Boom Egg is very flustered running his hands all over their soft fat bodies to slather them in cream and rubbing it in in public because it feels so intimate, especially when he's so excited by their size and can't help it. His dick jumps up a few times with a semi and he really hopes no one else sees but the fatties certainly notice and tease.

They need like two entire bottles worth to cover all the exposed skin on modern and Casino Egg! When it comes to their huge bellies he can't resist turning it into a discreet belly rub as he rubs his hands around and around. The two Eggs love this and they all get excited, they have to try to remember where they are before things get too naughty but the fatties can't help but moan slightly and sigh with delight when Boom Egg just has to grab and squeezes their rolls of fat on their belly and their tits very quickly during it. It takes a good few minutes to make sure it's all thoroughly applied to every area safely!

Boom Egg can apply his own sunscreen ebut modern and Casino Egg insist as an excuse to run their hands over his fit body. They whisper about how beautiful it is and how everyone is jealous that they're feeling him up like discreet isn't a word to them as one enjoys rubbing his strong tight back muscles and the other his neck, abs and stomach, then they each rub a bicep each and giggle and ask him to flex them while they do. They both try to slather his exposed butt cheeks in the cream and squeeze them and Boom Egg turns bright red and hopes nobody looks over to see two huge fat men enjoying his butt

When they're done with that they decide on their beach towels under their umbrellas for a bit after all that effort to apply sunscreen. When they're ready they get up to have some fun in the water and bring a beach ball in. They find that Modern and Casino Egg are struggling as it's been a while since they last swam and it makes them realize how much bigger and heavier they've gotten, making swimming much more strenuous. "Some Olympics athlete you are when you can barely make it from where you are to me!" Casino Egg teases modern as he and Boom Egg watch him try to swim over to them.

"You're clearly not having an easy time either!" Modern Egg shoots back as he's clearly not the only one red faced and out of breath just from swimming to get the ball whenever it goes too far. "And you're floating there like a big fat idle floatie right now and putting way less effort in than me." It's true, Casino Egg being bigger barely feels like he can swim at all and mostly just lets himself float still and catch the ball from there. And with the way Boom Egg is still a bit nervous about swimming in the sea, he's holding onto Casino Egg's fat flabby body like he really is floatie supporting him. XD

They both become cheeky and playful trying to grab and smack and tickle Boom Egg's butt in the water as they can't ignore it in that speedo the whole time and he giggles and tells them to stop as he tries to paddle away. It's one way to immediately push Boom Egg into paddling more confidently and get modern and Casino Egg moving more to chase after his little butt hehe. Boom Egg also sees how they like it by doing the same to their massive fat butts in the water that are impossible to miss and they can't swim fast enough to stop him from reaching and doing it repeatedly! Not that they want to!

After having fun playing with the beach ball in the water and splashing each other and chasing after each other's butts, they decide to play volleyball on the land. They're all eying each other up the whole time, seeing modern Egg's fit little body toned so beautifully, the way he muscles move from the activity, his visible bulge in his speedo, the way he bends over to pick up the ball when it falls out. And the way the two fatties soft flabby bellies and fat tits wobble and jiggle as they jump to hit the ball and run to fetch it when it rolls away, and their wet shorts cling to their butts and big bulges

Seeing them get so sweaty and out of breath so fast and easily and struggling to play with all that fat wobbling thickly and thinking about how it's because he's fattened them up so much makes Boom Egg very aroused. He thinks about all the food they might eat today. Casino Egg also teases modern Egg for how out of much of a challenge it is for him despite how he's also competed in volleyball in the Olympics too. Now here he is, very fat and slow and easily tired. That also puts a lot of thought in Boom Egg's mind with how much he's fed and fattened an Olympic athlete into this!

All these activities in the water and on the land are very hungry work so they ask Boom Egg he'll get them food from one of the stalls. He tries to hide his enthusiasm as they ask for two burger buns each with multiple patties stacked and packed with veggies, cheese, and bacon, and a giant heap of fries as he's been thinking about and anticipating to find out how much they'll eat. The fatties' eyes light up when Boom Egg comes over carefully carrying huge plates for them stacked high with food. They sit under their umbrellas and feast while Boom Egg sits between them with nothing but a popsicle

He gets flustered when they compliment the sight of him sucking on the popsicle. Casino Egg says he wishes Boom Egg was doing that to his "popsicle" right now while he eats and modern chimes in and says he wants the same. They also say they both want to pull his speedo aside and stick their popsicles between those fat butt cheeks. Boom Egg is blushing so hard as he says "Come on, do we have to discuss this in public?" They find it very funny and adorable and say they can't resist when he's say there was his cute little butt out and Boom Egg says "You're the ones who made me wear this!"

Both of the fatties practically inhale the mountain of food on their plates and love how they feel it fill up their bellies. They open their cooler of cans of soda and beer and begin guzzling them down with their greasy food and moan at the wonderful taste of it all. They finish it off pretty surprisingly fast for how much there was and Boom Egg asks if they enjoyed that, they agree and sound satisfied with their full bellies. But they look off into the distance and notice another stall selling huge hot dogs! They ask him to go and get one each for them. Boom Egg is surprised they want them already but obliges

They chase those giant burgers and tons of fries with the hot dogs and love how much fuller they feel on top of the burgers and fries. More cans help them wash it all down. But then they also spot XL slices of pizza and want one each too so Boom Egg brings those to them too. And then they see BBQ ribs and want those too! Boom Egg starts to feel a little embarrassed going up to the other stalls to order again and again but he's excited to get them when more food to stuff their bellies with. He's amazed as it all keeps disappearing completely in their bellies and they're swelling up bigger each trip he takes

After that they're certainly rather stuffed so they take a break from food to lay back and relax. Well for the most part because they also want slushies and a bowl of shaved ice because they're easy to just swallow down and require less effort but those just bloat up their bellies more with a bloat on top of all the cans they're still gulping down. It's like they just can't stop eating, like something has to be going down their greedy gullets and filling up their bellies nonstop! Despite how full and bloated they are, it only helps keep their appetite up and expanding their stomachs makes room for even more food

Boom Egg guesses that should finally sate their monstrous appetites. But then they see fried chicken and ask him for them too! He's shocked that they still want even more and at how rounded out and firm they feel when he places his hands and on their bellies, they're absolutely huge and bulging, he can feel how full they are and just the contact of his hands makes them groan from the sensitivity. He asks if they're really sure but Casino Egg insists with full confidence. Modern Egg is actually a little unsure with his smaller belly but doesn't want to be less impressive and he can't turn down his favorite food so he agrees

So Boom Egg goes to get two buckets and the vendor says "Are these for your friends over there too? Got quite the appetite don't they?" as he's seen him going to a bunch of stalls and carrying it all over to them. Boom Egg replies "Yeah, for my... friends... They sure do." as he thinks about how his boyfriends are going to stuff their bellies even more with this and how appalling the vendor must think it is with how greedy they are and how he's just enabling two massive fatties. He feels a rush of excitement when he heads back over and places the buckets of chicken in front of their huge full bellies.

They tear into it and he's in love with seeing them messily gorge themselves as they sloppily eat, still eating so much more so fast as they overfeed their huge greedy guts, so determined and enthusiastic and like they want to impress as their boyfriend watches. And the sounds of the chewing and smacking of their lips, the hums of delight and slight groans from how stuffed their bellies are and how they burp loudly through mouthfuls as they squeeze even more food inside them drive him wild. They manage to clear the buckets and they lay back sighing and belching and cracking open more cans

"So I take it you've finally had enough now?" Boom Egg dares to ask as they down a couple more cans. "No- BUURRP! We definitely need dessert!" Casino Egg says immediately and modern Egg quickly nods along despite feeling painfully engorged by now. They get Boom Egg to go and get them a long churro each. Somehow they manage that but then want lava cake too... They're visibly struggling, muffled groaning through mouthfuls and rubbing their bellies for support as they shove even more food down, their bellies look expanded to the limit but somehow they still seem to get even bigger

They're pretty drunk by now from the beers they've been washing it down with and it's inhibiting their ability to feel how painfully stuffed they are as much as if they were sober. So even after all that, they ask for a sundae to top it all off. Boom Egg wonders if he should refuse and say they've had enough but the sight of their huge round bellies so swollen and bulging while they still ask for more is so hard to not give in to. And so he goes and orders two big sundaes for them. He tells himself they do deserve the dessert after how well they've eaten and it would help cool them down from all this heat...

But really it's because he wants to see them sloppily forcing ice cream into their greedy mouths when they're already so overstuffed and look like they're about to burst. They eat with the sundae resting atop their huge bellies and swallow it down with urgency. But halfway through they're so stuffed they need help to get the rest down, they're so full they can barely move their arms to eat any more and need the push and motivation to get through it all, so they ask Boom Egg to help. He has to feed it to them both quickly enough so that it doesn't melt and that makes it all the more intense

He put spoonful after spoonful into their mouths, so fast they have no choice but to gulp the sundae down fast. The sight of the chocolate and vanilla ice cream around their mouths and running down their chins while they swallow it down, their breathless huffing, moaning, and burping between swallows, and the way their extremely engorged bellies gurgle and groan as Boom Egg gently rubs their massive packed full bellies and whispers "You're being such good boys, just keep eating" is so thrilling. Boom Egg can't hide the boner that's almost popping out of his speedo

Modern and Casino Egg start pleading for kisses while they struggle to eat the last of the ice cream. Boom Egg is embarrassed to kiss them in public but they whine for it and their cute fat faces are so tempting to kiss so he starts to give them quick kisses between feeding them spoonfuls, just barely obscured by their umbrellas and anyone who looked over at the right time would be able to tell what's happening. But it feels so nice and they all get lost in the intimacy of the feeding and the kissing. The kisses the fatties get after each gulp of ice cream along with the pleasure of the rubs keep them motivated

Finally they manage to reach the bottom of their bowls and then gulp down the rest of their cans. With that, they finally feel their done with a stack of empty plates and bowl and a big pile of empty cans beside them. They feel like huge beached whales stuffed to the gills and unable to move, very fitting for where they are on the shore of the beach. They're so heavy and full that they both collapse onto their towels. All Boom Egg can see from his angle are their engorged bellies bulging out like mountains. They're extremely overstuffed and absolutely massive!

They're both moaning and groaning about how they feel like they're about to explode and struggling to burp so they ask Boom Egg for help rubbing it. He says that if he does it while they're lay on their backs like this, everyone is going to see and know that something is up between them. They're both pretty drunk so they feel none of the fear eh does and say that if he's really worried, he could just apply more sunscreen to their bellies and pretend that's the only reason why he's touching them like this. So he squirts some of the tiny amount of it that they have left and gets to work

Boom Egg really gets to feel how huge and packed full their bellies are as he rubs his hands around their stuffed bellies slowly. He can feel how firm and bulging full their stomachs are under all the thick soft fat and how much their guts have expanded and rounded out, he's so in awe at how much food is inside them after he kept binging them more and more and thinks about it's all squeezed in there now. He can hear them gurgling loudly as they try to process all the greasy and sugary food and fizzy bubbly beverages they overfilled them with. He's quite proud to have overfed them so much

Running his hands over their tight, plump, swollen bloated bellies makes them moan from how sensual it feels from how sensitive they have become. When he runs his hands over the rounded out curves of the bellies and gently pushes down into the fat, they wince at first but then it dislodges long deep rumbling burps that were trapped in there and it makes them sigh from the immense relief. When bigger belches erupt from their bellies it turns heads and Boom Egg is embarrassed but tries to ignore it and focus on the two beautiful fat men before him and help comfort their poor overstuffed bellies

Eventually they both feel very sleepy with so much food packed into their guts and the heat, being weighed down by pounds of food in their gut and the humidity in the air makes it impossible for them to move for a while. Boom Egg suggests they have a little nap if they need it. And so they finally truly relax here after stuffing their faces nonstop, both lay so their giant bellies peek out from the umbrella and the warm rays of sun on their bare bellies feel so good along with Boom Egg's gentle rubs that lull them to sleep. Soon they're snoring with their fat stuffed guts heaving with every breath

They nap for about ten minutes and when they awake, Boom Egg says it's time to take a nice walk on the beach now it's not as hot and the sun is starting to set, they don't want to miss the beautiful sight. They struggle to lift themselves up off their backs let alone to their feet. Once they're up, they can really feel how much bigger and fuller their bellies are from the last time they were on their feet. During their very short nap, the bloat of their bellies softened slightly so they feel softer and more jiggly again but they're still absolutely bulging full of food and have barely began digestion, it's very intense

As the three walk across the beach, modern and Casino Egg feel like such big greedy overstuffed fatties with enormous bellies bulging and proceeding so far, so swollen and round and bare on display for all to see. The feeling of their overexpanded guts weighing down so heavily full of food makes them groan as they waddle along and wobble from the drunkenness too and they can't stop burping as they move. They bounce and jiggle thickly with every step and moan from the sensitivity and they're huffing and panting out of breath from having to carry so much weight and while in the heat too

"Uughh, I really overdid it, I feel like I'm gonna explode... BUURRRP!" Modern Egg finally admits as he attempts to stretch but the move applies more pressure to his sensitive overexpanded belly and tight stomach when it sticks out as he arches his back. He groans from the pain of that and the big deep belch that rips through him. But at the same time, it feels so good to be so packed full to the very brim and to burp a ton. He has surprised himself with how much he managed to force in with the motivation of pleasing Boom Egg and keeping up with Casino Egg but his immense greed certainly played a part too

"Seems like you both got quite carried away! I'm not sure if I've ever seen your bellies this huge before!" Boom Egg replies with stars in his eyes. "You could say that, heheh." Casino Egg chuckles. "Man, it feels so good~" He's much more content and comfortable with being so heavily engorged despite how out of breath he is and the slight ache because he's much more used to eating like this more often than modern Egg and has the bigger belly. He's very satisfied to have overfed his gut so well and seeing that it makes Boom Egg happy and impresses him as he makes it even better as he lets it bulge out with pride

As they go further down the beach and further away from all the other people, modern and Casino Egg get into a certain mood. Boom Egg is walking in front and looking at the horizon at the beautiful sunset and the two fatties do the same but quickly lose focus of that as their eyes land on something else in front of them. Boom Egg looks over his shoulder at them to see they were both staring at his back muscles and butt and licking their lips with boners in their shorts, rubbing them through them excitedly

"Oh you're such perverts, can't you take the time to appreciate the sunset for just a minute?" Boom Egg huffs and pouts but blushes slightly, feeling flattered again to be seen as so desirable to such big handsome fatties. "I can't help it sweetheart, your butt just looks so good in that speedo." Casino Egg replies shamelessly and modern Egg nods in agreement. "We've eaten so well for you, please let us admire and touch your beautiful body!" Boom Egg rolls his eyes but can't help but smile and gives in, kissing them and letting them run their hands over his hot toned body and little bubble butt

Things get heated as being far enough away that other people can't see them gives Boom Egg more comfortable and modern and Casino Egg are so drunk and horny that they can't hold back. Their cocks are all throbbing hard as they kiss harder and caress each other's bodies so intimately, their hands on his butt and his hands on their bellies. The pressure of modern Egg's most painfully belly pushing against Boom Egg's flat stomach as they kiss makes it ache more again and belch in his face. He pleads Boom Egg between heavy breaths to rub his belly and his cock because he desperately needs relief from the fullness and arousal

Boom Egg sees this fatty really needs help so he gets on his knees, modern Egg pulls his cock out his shorts and Casino Egg whips his out with a "hey, mine too!" so both of their big thick cocks are pointing at him. Boom Egg grabs and starts jerking them off, then takes one into his mouth and alternates between sucking the two. "So much better and hotter when he's sucking our popsicles instead, heh~" Casino Egg grins. While Boom Egg sucks modern Egg's cock, Casino Egg kisses him and rubs his belly so they're both dealt with at the same time. It's so relieving, soothing, and pleasurable he sighs happily

Modern Egg feels much better immediately with the immense pleasure. Casino Egg praises him as he rubs and pats his bulging belly, saying "Damn handsome, you're really getting good at stuffing your gut to the limit! Keep this up and you'll be growing as big and fat as me in no time!" Modern Egg is torn between letting go and getting as fat as him because he's jealous at times to not wanting to lose control and get as big because that would be going over his set limit for himself. "Ah well I'm not too sure if I sh- BUURRRP!" Casino Egg squeezes modern Egg's belly to make him shut himself up with a big burp

"Shhh, you know you'd love to get as big and fat as me. And you've been growing so much lately, you're definitely well on your way to becoming the perfect fatty. You just need to keep eating and getting bigger." Casino Egg whispers as he kisses his chubby cheek. He's right, he has been getting so much fatter lately and it feels so good. He's so overwhelmed by the pleasure that the last of his confliction in this moment melts away and he becomes proud to hear how he's getting so much fatter and it's so tempting to let go as he's lost in the fantasy. "You're right, I do... I need to get fatter." He blurts out

"Atta boy!" Casino Egg praises then turns his attention to Boom Egg, "come on sugar, suck on that cock harder and make it extra wet and sloppy because he's been such a good boy and eaten so well today." Boom Egg obliges and takes it deeper and swirls his tongue faster and harder while Casino Egg keeps rubbing his hands around his swollen stuffed belly, making modern Egg moan louder. "Yeahhh ya like that don'tcha, imagine getting so much fatter and us doing this to you everyday?" Casino Egg smirks as modern Egg becomes a moaning whining mess. "Ughh p-please, too much... It's too good~"

When it's time for them to swap so Boom Egg sucks Casino Egg's cock, modern Egg rubs his belly in return and is amazed. "Fuck you're getting so massive, this fat belly is absolutely enormous." He blushes while he holds his massive fat flabby belly and caresses his thick fat, thinking about how this is a version of him that's really let himself go and eats even more than him and got so much fatter. It fact his belly is fuller right now too because he already ate quite a bit more before they even came here. His huge stomach is firmly stretched and filled to capacity underneath that thick pudgy fat

"Mmm, I know! It feels so good to be this big, bet you're jealous your belly isn't as huge and soft as mine~ BUUUURRRP!" He belches so loudly when modern Egg puts his hands on the undersides of his belly, lifts it up, and shakes it with his hands. It feels so heavy and jiggles so thickly, it feels great for Casino Egg and he's so proud of how much he's eaten. Modern Egg gets defensive "I'm not jealous! I can't let myself get as big as you anyway, I'd be too fat to get anything done. I mean look at what you've done to yourself, you've lost control and become a big heavy fatass... It's so appalling... It's so sexy, fuck!"

Modern Egg fails at pretending he doesn't envy it despite confliction and finds it so hot. "It sure is, heheh. And I know you wanna get just as big as me!" Casino Egg beams with pride and sighs happily at modern Egg loving up his giant stuffed belly. The sight of them kissing and rubbing each other's bellies and moaning from the pleasure of having their dicks sucked is so hot to Boom Egg, he has to jerk off while he keeps switching between sucking them both. In the end they all cum so hard and feel so blissed out, walking back to the hotel very pleased and content after the great day they spent together! 💜

[doctorbrown]

MCFLY JULY ‘24 ⸺ 「 22 / 31 * DUDED-UP, EGG-SUCKIN' GUTTER TRASH 」

September 12, 1885

“Coffee, Mister Brown?” Maggie asks, looking back over her shoulder.

“Please, Emmett is fine. And yes, thanks.”

“Alright, Emmett. I’d offer you sugar, but we’ve run out of the stuff two days ago, so I hope you don’t mind it black.”

“That’s not a problem. I’ve been trying to get myself used to drinking it black.” The bitterness will be exactly what he needs for this conversation.

Seamus walks into the room just as Maggie hands a steaming cup over to Emmett, roughly scraping a towel against a patch of dirt caked onto his neck.

“I thought I told you to wash up before you came and joined us.” Maggie sniffs at the air and makes a face. “You smell worse than the animals, Seamus.” Shrugging, Seamus drapes the towel over the back of the nearest chair and settles down opposite Emmett. A thick cloud of uncertainty has followed Seamus into the room, crackling with a palpable energy in the air between them.

“And keep Mister Brown waiting?”

“Emmett,” he offers again, to which Seamus nods.

Caught by the weight of the imploring look in Seamus’ eyes, Emmett half-considers dispensing with the story he’d created to lay the truth out on the table before them, consequences be damned. It would be nice to bring them into the secret as well, have two more people with whom he could be more open around and not worry about accidentally slipping up and revealing something he shouldn’t, but he had agreed to pay the price for his knowledge the very first time he travelled through time and now the consequences were his to suffer.

Telling them the truth would be an additional burden he didn’t feel right saddling either of them with.

But some variation of the truth with the temporal aspects of the story carefully redacted? They deserved that much.

“So, what is it you came all this way to tell us, Emmett?” Maggie settles into the seat beside Seamus, pushing a cup into his hands.

Seamus’ thoughtful prayers at the funeral had been twisting a proverbial knife in his gut and he feared that if he left it a moment longer, his subconscious would find a way to make physical wounds in its place.

Better late than never would have to do.

“I’d meant to come sooner, but with everything happening, I’m sorry, time just got away from me.” Seamus nods, the irony lost on him.

“Those haven’t been easy things you had to deal with these past few days.”

Even faking a death was a messy affair. “No, but they are related to why I’m here. I actually came to talk about Clint.” The name immediately strikes a chord with both of them, Seamus leaning forward in his seat with a peculiar expression on his face that Emmett can’t quite place.

As if he’d been expecting that name to come out of his mouth.

While that opens the door for a number of very interesting questions, Emmett keeps his train of thought on one singular track, sipping at the hot coffee to wet his suddenly dry throat. “Particularly, about his supposed death.” Maggie starts to look at him with that same disapproving look he’s seen on countless faces in his own time. He can’t say he’s surprised.

It’s Seamus, however, whose face he finds himself unable to look away from.

“Clint wasn’t on that hijacked train when it went into the ravine. Believe me, I know how it sounds—crazy—but that story about him trying to stop the robbers was just that. A story.” One he’d run through over-and-over with Clara until it sounded believable enough for the general public who would forget about it the moment the next thing caught their eye.

“I told Marshall Strickland how Clara and I saw the train go over the ravine. That Clint had heard word about a robbery happening on-board the train and planned to intercept them before they could do any real harm, but he wasn’t able to stop the hijackers from plunging the train into the ravine.”

The Marshall appeared to accept it with minimal questioning despite the disbelieving scowl permanently etched onto his face. Clint Eastwood had already become a local hero—to say he died a hero’s death in an attempt to uphold the law and protect the innocent would be a fitting, poetic end, one that involved minimal scrutiny on the Marshall’s part.

“But the truth is, that didn’t happen. Not like that.” Seamus remains a thoughtfully quiet enigma, near impossible to read, and Emmett sips at his coffee, grimacing at just how bitter this cup seems to be. “The train fell into the ravine, that’s for sure—the wreck is still there—but Clint didn’t go with it.”

Maggie, quiet up until this point save for the expression on her face that had grown more and more disbelieving with each word, finally speaks.

“Now Emmett, you’re really sittin’ here expecting us to believe that all that was made up? Do you take us for fools?” Maggie’s tone is sharp. “Or are you just tryin’ to spare our feelings, seeing as how it was no secret we were worried for Mister Eastwood? In which case, I’ll tell you we need no coddling. We’ve faced Death before and come out of it. This will be no different.” Maggie reaches for Seamus’ arm, squeezing tightly.

“No, I don’t think that. I told you it would sound crazy, but everything I’ve said so far is the truth. Clint left town that day and I used the train wreck as a cover story to protect him in case Tannen or someone else came looking for him.”

“So, you’re telling us he’s alive, are you?” Seamus sounds both dreamy and sceptical, torn between whether he should allow himself to believe it or to join his wife in saying what Emmett knows. That when you think about it, it sounds too unbelievable to be truth.

But Seamus doesn’t look surprised. Confused, maybe, thoughtful, certainly, but this is the very same expression he has seen countless times on Marty just before the kid says something profound and wise, well wiser than his years, that cuts straight to the heart of the matter in ways Emmett himself would never have considered. A sixth sense, for lack of a better word—an perceptiveness and awareness that attunes him to the world around him with special attention paid to those close to him—that is always immediately followed with some comment about perceived non-intelligence that makes Emmett want to pull his hair out.

Marty might not have been book-smart in the way he was, but he was clever and wise, an almost perfect reflection of what he sees echoed here in Seamus.

“Oh, Seamus, it’s a fine tale, isn’t it? The hand of God comes down to stop Clint from getting on that train and those bandits get what they deserve while Clint lives out a happy life elsewhere?”

Seamus only shakes his head, looking at—through—Emmett, straight to his soul. “It is quite the tale, but I don’t get the feeling that he’s lying, Maggie. Just look at him—that’s not the face of a man who came here to sell us a story just for our sakes.”

Maggie nearly throws her hands up in disbelief. “Another of your feelings, Seamus! Honestly, I don’t know what to make of these half the time. You really believe that?”

“Aye, I do. Same way I believe that there’s more here that Emmett’s not telling us.” Emmett blinks, stiffening in his seat. “I think it’s all more complicated than that.”

Swallowing, he looks down at the ripples spreading across the surface of his coffee. “No—you’re right. That is the truth, but it isn’t the whole truth. The whole truth is, frankly, even more unbelievable from your perspective.”

Seamus and Maggie exchange a glance of a thousand unspoken words before Seamus smiles, his tone light for the first time that afternoon. “We’ll be the ones to decide that, Emmett.”

[iobsessoverfictionalmen]

The Taste of Revenge (4)

Warnings: canon typical violence, mentions of non-consensual drugging, descriptions of character death, mentions and descriptions of jail, car crashes, descriptions of drowning, lying, manipulation, guns, yandere themes, cursing, mafia AU, mafia Rafael Barba (trust me, he needs the warning), spoilers for Hannibal, references to Leverage, past Frederick Chilton/Rafael Barba, NSFW moments and angst.

Spanish translations

Cariño - Sweetheart.

Chapter 4

“I will be collecting those,” you vowed, motioning to the eggs in the hands of one of the Interpol agents.  From the way they interacted with each other, you were willing to bet that this agent was the one the other three agents reported to.  He hadn’t spoken during your conversation with Sterling and he wasn’t the agent that had stepped forwards to smack your hand away from the eggs.

The agents paired up and then went to two separate, unmarked vehicles while you followed Sterling to his car.

“You need to teach your agents to blend in.”  You instructed, “If they continue to dress in suits and ties, they might encounter some very unforgiving people during a case.”

Sterling didn’t appear to heed your words but you hoped that he listened to them.  You weren’t telling him about his agents sticking out like a sore thumb when they wore suits just to be petty.  A chirp sounded, informing you that the car door unlocked and you climbed into the passenger seat.

Your eyes landed on the gear box, “I didn’t know that you knew how to drive a manual.”

“The car that I learnt to drive on was a manual.”  Sterling revealed gruffly as he slipped into the flow of traffic, “I saw no reason to lose the skill.”

“One time, the boss took us all out to a racetrack.  The cars were all manual.  He tied all our favourite items to posts around the track and while we were driving, we needed to find ways to collect them without damaging the car within a time limit.  That was the day I learned to drive a car with manual transmission.”

“The more I hear about Jethro Gibbs, the more I wonder how that man has continued to serve as an agent.”

“That’s easy to answer.  He’s a good man, an effective leader and one of the best NCIS agents that I’ve had the privilege of knowing.”

Sterling made a non-committal noise in the back of his throat and you realised that your conversation was over.  On the positive side, his driving was much more controlled than Ziva’s or Gibbs’ and you found yourself relaxing in your seat.  That was until your eyes moved up to the rear vision mirror and you noticed the cars with the other Interpol agents breaking suddenly and three unfamiliar cars creeping forward on the road.

In the calmest tone you could muster, you focused on Sterling.  “Either someone forgot to tell us that we’re escorting the president today or we’ve just picked up a less than friendly tail.”

Sterling’s eyes flicked up to the rear vision mirror and your eyes moved around the car, examining any places around the car that possibly hid a gun, “The odds of this are slim but you wouldn’t happen to be carrying a gun right now, would you?”

“No, I’m not.”  Sterling admitted and he removed a hand from the steering wheel.  You were about to question what he was doing when he reached over and with one hand opened the glove box.  Nestled in the glove box were your gun and badge.

“Would these come in handy?”

With a touch of amusement, you thanked him and grabbed your shield and your gun.  “They’re travelling in the standard phalanx formation.  The one in the middle will speed up and the one holding the gun will aim for the middle of the car.  You need to keep driving no matter what happens.  We have two minutes at the most before they begin their attack.”

You checked your gun and with relief, noted that you had a full clip.  You twisted around so that you could grab the lever that reclined the seat.

“What do you think you’re doing?!”

“Just drive!”  You ordered, “Stay on this road.”  You added as the car climbed a small hill and you saw a river winding underneath you.

You adjusted the lever until you were lying flat on your stomach on the seat.  During this process, you had to undo your seatbelt but you made sure that you clicked it back into place.  It definitely felt odd in this position but you would rather the strange feeling as opposed to flying through the windscreen because you didn’t have your seatbelt on.

Just as you predicted, the middle car sped up so that it was now leading the other two.

“Do you know how they were able to isolate us from the other Interpol agents?”

You squinted and barely made out that one of the passengers was typing on a laptop.  “From this distance, I can see one of them typing on a laptop.  Are you the only person on your team that can drive a manual?”

“Yes.” Helpfully the car sped up and you saw that one of the passengers was indeed typing on a laptop.

“That’s how they’re doing it then.  They’ve hacked into the computer systems in the automatic cars and forced them to stop.” 

“Don’t the community of hackers have any new ideas?  With all the tools at their disposal, you would think they’d try for a little originality.”

You ran out of time to ask Sterling what he meant with his words.  Instead you could only yell out for Sterling to brace himself as the passenger in the front of the car that was approaching you the fastest raised his gun and fired off a shot.

Sterling flinched but kept his grip on the wheel.  You raised your gun slightly, aimed at the headlights of the car tailing you and fired out of the already damaged back window.  There was a colossal bang and the car swerved to the right as the airbags emerged.  The car sideswiped a tree before colliding head on with a telegraph pole.

The second unfamiliar car jumped forwards and realising what was about to happen, you yanked the lever up and hurriedly readjusted the seat and your seatbelt.  “That trick isn’t going to work again.”

“What other ideas do you have?” Sterling gritted out.  His words or tone didn’t alarm you but you detected a subtle note of panic in his voice that did.   Exhaling deeply, you pointed your gun into the small gap between the passenger seat and the window behind the passenger.

“Come on.  Move up a little further.”  You prayed.

The car you were in inched forwards and the second car pursuing you followed suit.  You focused on the first wheel of the car on your right.  Seconds after you had squeezed the trigger, a bullet propelled itself out of the chamber.  It shattered the glass of the passenger window and embedded itself in your target.  The tyre deflated with an audible whoosh and you raised your gun to shoot at the headlight closest to you.  The car’s airbags propelled themselves forwards and the driver stomped on the brake hard.

“Two down.”

“Don’t celebrate just yet.”

The third car slammed into you with tremendous force.  It pushed you across the two lanes of traffic so that you were opposite the river. 

“If the car hits us one more time…”

You couldn’t get a clear shot at the two people in the car because you didn’t want to risk Sterling being caught in the crossfire.  Fragments of ideas popped into your head but they were all too risky.  If you were by yourself, then you would attempt them but you weren’t alone.

Then you remembered a manoeuvre that Ziva had used once.  It was risky but it was the best option that you had.

“Sterling!  Hit the brake now!”

The Interpol agent wisely chose not to argue and stomped on the brake harshly.  At the same time, the remaining car shot past you in a blur.  You aimed and fired at the back tyre and at the small square on the side where the petrol tank was.   There was a bang and the final car became airborne.  Flames erupted from the petrol tank.  It flipped in the air and landed on its side with a tremendous crash.  As gravity pulled the car back to earth, the boot of the car smashed into the car you were travelling in and pushed you sideways into the river.

You had just enough time to realise that the river was deeper than you initially thought before your car began sinking into the river.  Time was of the essence so you ripped your seatbelt off and yanked the headrest from your chair.  In a smooth movement, you unbuckled Sterling’s seatbelt and propelled yourself forwards to smash at the windscreen with the headrest.

Cracks appeared immediately and you held up three fingers to signal to Sterling that he needed to be ready to get out of the car.  Once you shattered the windscreen, you wouldn’t have much time before the car flooded.  You put down a finger before you hit the windscreen again.

Your lungs were starting to burn from the lack of oxygen so you gathered your remaining strength and threw the headrest at the centre of the shattered glass.  Luckily for you both, the glass shattered outwards not inwards.

Sterling used the seat he was sitting on as leverage to push himself out of the car.  You watched him swim up to the surface of the river.  You braced your feet on the ruined seat and pushed forwards.  With the added force, you shot out of the car but as you passed through what used to be the windscreen, your arm connected with the rear vision mirror.  You let out a muted scream and bubbles floated from your mouth as your arm became too painful to move.

Slowly you swam towards the surface but your vision dimmed and you were struck with the feeling that you wouldn’t make it.  Your limbs became heavy and your eyelids fluttered.  You began to sink.

Something disturbed the water around you and you glimpsed the sunlight above you before two strong arms wrapped around you and guided you to the surface.  With the added support, your head broke the surface of the water and you greedily gasped in air.

Your rescuer towed you to where the river met grass and with a tremendous heave, your back was resting on the grass.   In the distance, you could hear the scream of sirens.  The wailing of the sirens grew louder and louder and even in your exhausted and pain filled state, you knew that that meant they were coming closer.

Your body registered a soft touch on your cheek as if someone was brushing the backs of their fingers across it, “You’re safe now cariño.”

The voice was hushed yet somehow familiar.  The sirens sounded extremely close now and just when you registered their closer proximity, you realised the presence by your side had vanished.

[lake-archive]

Roaring Guitarist - A Strange Encounter

AO3 Link

Fandom: Show By Rock

Series: Rocking Together

Characters: Ole (OC), Ann (OC), Maple Arisugawa, Strange (OC)

Previous Chapter - Masterlist - Next Chapter

Ole had been placed in his seat for some time now. At that point it was just him and the egg Maple sitting at one of the tables and waiting for either someone interested to arrive or Ann to finally make it here. Though in their absence one conversation started to take place… 

“Say Ole–San…” Maple began, making the cat turn to the egg. Or at least the gaze, he didn’t bother coming face to face with the man. Sounded too exhausting to move the head. “Why did you insist on having it at the café?”

“Simple – We’re saving money from using a venue.” He responded, not hesitating whatsoever. That was before he lifted a piece of tuna into his mouth, then chewed on it. “Also I’m a hungry.”

“But you keep ordering something every ten minutes!”

“I’m very hungry.” Ole responded with a full mouth, not paying attention to Maple’s shocked face in any way. Well, this one was probably terrified by the sight of plates next to the man yet who was Ole if he cared about that? He liked eating and his stomach may as well be a black hole. And who was he to say no to fish?

“R… Right… Hungry…” The egg eventually sighed in defeat, sinking back into his seat. “Nevermind…”

“Also I have to keep myself occupied while waiting or I might fall asleep.”

“You have a very carefree way of living.”

All the cat did was shrug before shoving another piece of tuna into his mouth. Honestly he was getting impatient here, very much so, and was so close tapping his feet. That was until his ears wagged, taking in the sound of a car parking. At first one may think ‘ Finally, someone is coming to audition! ’ but… No, not that exactly. Because the two voices sounded all too familiar.

“Aaand here we a— A café?” A male voice asked, sounding overly enthusiastic. So much so that Ole felt as if his ears were being pierced through. Too noisy… “Are you meeting someone?”

However, another voice echoed in response. “I… Guess you could say that.”

“A date? Haha, I’m hurt now~”

“It’s not a date! And even if it was… You don’t need to care. Ain’t any of your business!”

“Message received, for now that is.”

“Don’t give me that face. Anyways, don’t you have to go somewhere?”

“Ah right! I should be on time! Have fun Ann–Chan! See you~!” 

“Yeah, bye.” And then the car drove off. Shortly after the door would open and the one who belonged to that voice had entered the room, finally. And to no one’s surprise… 

“So Ann… Your boyfriend drove you here?” Ole asked, rolling his eyes. Though more at his own words if anything. And they had taken note, freezing for a short moment.

“He’s no longer my boyfriend!” They protested, their voice oozing with annoyance at this. As usual. “Anyways, sorry for being late. The rain just… Well…”

“I told you to bring an umbrella at all times, didn’t I?” The cat interrupted quickly, his voice as sharp as ever. 

“Eh!? W… Well—”

“Ole–San, go easy on… Them, was it?” Maple interrupted the two, probably trying to not make it escalate. “We don’t want to leave a bad impression on the new band members, do we!?”

The cat thought for a moment before sighing, crossing his arms yet again. “Guess you’re right. Fine. Just sit down Ann. We will have a talk about this later.”

The brunette nodded weakly for a moment, about to sit down yet froze from one moment to the next when hearing someone say: “ Foood… ” in an utterly creepy sounding voice. One could see how they just froze on the spot, their ears wagging non stop. No, they were shivering. All while the voice said once more “ Foood… ” in this eerie tone. Then again, the only other one who got unsettled seemed to be Maple. One quick glance to the side and Ole spotted the egg under the table, as if holding onto his dear life. 

Seriously, those two… All this cat could do was shake his head. They didn’t even see who it was, let alone how the person looked like. Also the voice wasn’t that scary. That was how he was begging for food sometimes too. Oh well, whatever…  “You want some food?” In fact, if he could turn the tables right then maybe there would be the third member… If this mysterious person could play that is.

“F… Food!? Food!?” The voice then said, as if some dog who had just heard the word ‘treat’ and now acting up on it. Easy to bribe with food… Understandable, this old cat may also be bribed with food if it wasn’t so serious. “Food! Food!” 

“I take that as a yes.” Ole then quickly used one of his hands to grab the egg man and lift him up, no longer hidden. This one was suddenly screaming and struggling for his dear life while being held up in the air yet the cat didn’t care. “You think you still have energy to cook?”

“Wha— Me!? Hold on a minute!”

“There’s a customer. Cook something.”

“W…. Wait, we can’t just—”

“Just do it.” Ole sighed. Was the CEO not catching on? He expected Ann not to catch on, given they had never seen this before. And they sure looked confused while trying to keep their composure. But Maple? Come on. Sometimes you just gotta push it. And if it was food which was necessary then… “You’ll see later.”

“Fine fine! But put me down! It’s way too high up there!” The egg complained.

“Too high?” The cat asked, only slightly turning his head to have the struggling egg in his view. “Please… Didn’t you climb a sky scraper before?”

“Tha– That was different! It was for—”

“The sake of Midi City, yeah yeah.” With a sigh Ole finally put Maple down. “I get it. Now get to it or who knows what this person will do.” After all, some people are dangerous when hungry. He knew since he was one of those people, always ready to scratch someone if he hadn’t eaten in a few hours.

One would have to take in the sight to believe it as plate after plate was being emptied. It had the other two in shock, Ann and Maple witnessing how the plates filled with lots of food were emptied in record speed. Soon there was a literal tower stacking up right next to this young, short dino person. A small, chubby figure with long, spiky brown hair. The eyes seemed unnatural, being golden for the most part yet the color seemed to turn into magenta the lower it went.There were circles under the eyes, literal bags, looking even worse than Ann’s after their regular all–nighters during the weekends. Feathers stuck out from the clothes around the elbows and arms especially, looking rather fluffy. It made Ole’s ears wag and wanting to go on the hunt, maybe swat them yet he held himself back of course. If it wasn’t for these awfully long nails which could probably scratch anyone on sight… As for the clothes, they were rather simple – A black tee with some curious graphic on it as well as pants with covered belts. That was that. And this small figure was slurping everything away as it was given out. A small yet hungry guy if you will.

“How is it?” Ole decided to ask while watching the dino eat up the last few pieces of the several meals he was given. His mouth had been covered in crumbs and sauce yet he didn’t seem to bother. Instead he looked up at the cat with little issue, nodding. Luckily one could guess what it meant with that smile on the dino’s face. 

“Good I take. That’s pleasant.” Ole let out a light chuckle before turning his attention to the egg man. “Guess this means compliments to the chef.”

Though of course Maple had to act as if that was embarrassing him on the spot, rubbing the back of his head with a visible ‘embarrassed’ blush. “Ohoho, it’s nothing but a hobby of mine.”

“Right…” Ole then turned back to the dinosaur who looked rather content compared to earlier. His eyes seemed livelier than when he had entered. “Are you satisfied?”

“Hm? Oh yeah! Food!” The guy responded, the happiness written all over his face. “The food here is very good!”

“I have to agree. It is tasty and I like eating here too.” The cat agreed. Oh how he also wanted to keep going about the food here but there was business to attend to. He couldn’t lose his focus now. “Anyways, you are still aware that this is a café, right?”

A sudden headtilt. “It is?”

“Yeah. You will be asked for compensation.”

“Erm… Ole, what about the–” Ann wanted to throw in but Ole interrupted them quickly.

“We’re getting to that.” All while the cat male was witnessing the reaction of the small dino, this one being in literal shock. He may as well be shaking when having heard that of all things, as if almost breaking out into tears at any moment.

“W… Wait… But I— I’m just a hungry boy!” He even threw in, almost pleading. One would almost feel bad for him… But only almost.

Ole waved him off quickly however. “We’ll not demand any money from you.”

“N… Not?”

“No. But I want something else from you in return. Do you play any instruments?”

The dino boy had to think for a moment, really hard in fact. “Instrume– Oh… Oh! I remember!” Remember? “Uhm… Guitars are pretty cool.”

Ole then turned his head to Ann, almost glaring at them. “Ann, get the guitar in the back.”

“Eh!? Why me!?” They asked, almost shocked. “Why not go and ge—”

“What if I break my bones?”

“Oh now you’re worried about that…”

“Just go get it already.”

“F… Fine…” Though reluctantly they got up and did as told, a few moments later returning with a guitar inside a guitar case. They placed it down, right in front of the boy and sighing shortly after. “There. This one, right?”

The cat nodded. “Yes. Thank you.” 

After a quick grumble they sat back down, resulting in the other male… Sniffing the guitar? Yeah, sniffing, as if discovering a new object. All before opening it and pulling out the guitar in question, one primarily colored in black in the shape of a Superstrat. The boy lifted it up, latching onto it and eyeing it carefully. “This feels familiar.” He mumbled though no one in the room was sure what that even meant. All they could witness was him eyeing and sniffing it.

“When you have concluded your observations… Would you play something for us? As compensation for the food.” Ole said yet wasn’t sure if the guy had even heard. He wasn’t directly responding… Until finally holding the guitar properly. He out the band over himself to have it hanging around him. An arm a little over the top of it and standing in a straight forward posture. He hadn’t bothered tuning it yet, but that was perhaps not important right now. Instead he started playing instantly, using the nails of one of his hands like a chip for the guitar. 

His fingers moved quickly on the neck of the guitar. It was audible due to being close enough at the very least, the sounds clear. And yet the boy looked a little confused himself, surprised but he kept going. And as he did Ole pointed to one of the boxes nearby, urging Maple on doing something… Long story short, secretly plug in the guitar. 

The egg was a little shaken yet agreed quickly, taking the cable and plugging in as the dino kept on playing on this guitar. And once it was plugged in the sounds were audible. The melody was a quick one. Sure, one without much direction yet anyone with practiced ears could not deny that this guy wasn’t a beginner. He had it down, as if all he needed to play was instinct and nothing else. Yeah, instinct. That was what this was. And honestly, it was a little impressive. No, very much so. Never had Ole heard such a melody. To say that he was impressed was an understatement. He got lost in this melody and the longer he listened the more he was certain… Yeah, this guy… It had to be him! 

“Join our band.” The cat suddenly said out loud, making silence kick in out of nowhere. The melody from the guitar stopped and the dino eyed the cat male in surprise. But it was not just him, Maple and Ann… He could feel their eyes too. But it didn’t bother Ole in the slightest. He was set on this and there was no escaping his claws now. 

“Your band?” The dino asked.

The cat nodded. “Yeah. I am forming a band and I would like you to join.”

Needless to say, his gaze was a little uneasy. He seemed to really debate this. Actually no, he was about to ask something. “Uh… I don’t know. What is a—”

“The food will be free of charge.”

“I’m joining!” And there it was, no buts. That was the answer Ole wanted to hear and it had him grin with visible triumph. 

“There we go. Happy to have you.”

“This was a little too easy…” Ann commented, in visible in disbelief. Yet their protest had not been as loud as Maple’s who threw in something right away.

“Stop stop stooop! We don’t even know who this guy is!” The egg said and… Well, when Ole was forced to overthink that, he had a point.

“True… We don’t have a name…”

“I think we need more than a—”

“What’s your name?” The cat asked directly, ignoring the CEO altogether. One could tell that stubborn mode kicked in. There was ‘no’ accepted at this moment. One could hear how Maple was probably dropping to the ground in defeat yet that was not the cat’s concern right now.

“A… Name?” The dino repeated, then looking around nervously. His gaze wandered around, as if… Not knowing the answer? That was weird… Even Ole got a little curious about that one.

“Yeah, a name. Everyone has one.”

“I don’t think I have? Uhm…” 

“No name? Strange…” That was what had escaped Ole’s lips. It was a curious case, one he had not expected. What did that mean? He doesn’t think that he has one. Even Ole had one. He had never met a person who doesn’t have a name. No one. That would be a first, wouldn’t—

“Strange! Yes yes! My name’s Strange!” The dino suddenly exclaimed, though the nervousness audible. It had Ole a bit in shock. Did he just introduce himself as… 

“Strange you say…” 

But that was met with an eager nod. “Yes! Strange!”

“I… I see.” Something told Ole that wasn’t it but if the dino insisted… Strange it is. “We will look forward working with you Strange.”

“Mhm mhm! And I will look forward working with Kitty!”

“K… Kitty?” What?

“Yes, Kitty.” Strange said, then pointing at the man with the cat ears. Claiming that Ole had a baffled expression on his face was an understatement. This sounded embarrassing even… ‘Kitty’, he? What? Where is that coming from!?

“My name isn’t—” Yet before he could continue he heard snickering from the back.

“O… Ole… Kitty… That… Is a first…” Ann’s voice was at the brink of cracking yet they held it back. 

“Y… Yes… Very fitting for Ole–San…” Maple agreed!? Yet at the brink of bursting out laughing!? Those two…But in the end Ole decided to just swallow it for now and ignore it. He will have a talk with the two later.

“Just… Nevermind. It’s good to have you.”

And that was how Strange joined the band. An encounter which was sudden and odd but it earned them another member to the team. And thus the group was almost complete. There was only one missing before the quartet had been complete.

However, that is a story for next time. The story of how a bunny had found herself in a group with a cat, a dinosaur and… A weird mix of a cat and a wolf.

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[livebloggingmydescentintomadness]

tw suicidal thoughts

hi momdad. I'm not doing very well right now and although I know I'll be okay, do you have any tips for how to make it easier while I wait it out? anything to just block out the constant suicidal thoughts and stop me mentally planning things that make me sad to think about. I understand if you don't have the time/spoons for this and I'll be okay either way, but your words often make me feel a lot better about things. thanks <3

hey there, darling, i'm really sorry you're going through this. Bad Thoughts are also one of my biggest enemies, and i've been dealing with them for... going on twenty years, now. so, let's break this down.

in my expert opinion, you need to attack Bad Thoughts from three different sides: physical, mental, and social. congrats, you've already taken a step on the social side!

physically: i know, fucking believe me i know, that right now is the last time you feel like doing anything, but it genuinely is harder to feel like dying when you're clean, fed, and rested. this isn't about being perfect, having a bubble bath and making your bed or whatever, it's just about feeling less gross, through whatever means you're capable of.

change your clothes if you've been wearing them more than a day, take a sponge bath to get rid of the worst of the grime and stink, throw down a fresh flat sheet on your bed or change your pillowcase if it's been a long time since you changed them. whatever little thing you can do.

eat something. if all you've got is candy bars, then eat candy bars, but it is important to keep in mind that you will, unfortunately, feel better when you've had some nutrition. if you can get some apple slices, baby carrots, snap peas, etc, super easy finger foods, that's great. you also need protein and will feel weak and shitty without it, so get some beef jerky, hard boiled eggs, whatever you can. doesn't matter if you're just eating peanut butter out of the jar, just eat.

i know, intimately, the pain of insomnia, so if you can't sleep i totally get it, but do try and sleep instead of just staying awake because you can't face your own mind. honestly, i have a small tv in my room and i tend to keep it on at a very low volume when i sleep, because the noise helps to keep my mood from tanking when i close my eyes. if you need something like that, that's totally okay. just try and sleep, or at least rest. if nothing else, close your eyes for a while and listen to a podcast.

lastly - and know that i'm saying this through gritted teeth, seething - i'm afraid that exercise helps. i hate it, i hate every minute of it, but it actually fucking helps. i prefer to lift weights and/or do yoga, as i can go at my own pace in my own room, and stop whenever i can't take it anymore. i sleep so much better when i exercise 2-3 times a week, because life is just horrible like that.

mentally: when it comes to fight off the Bad Thoughts, distraction is The Most Important Thing. when you can't do anything else, distraction is your last line of defense. and i have unmedicated adhd so i know it's fucking hard, but it helps if you cultivate multiple tactics that work as distractions.

the best distractions i've found:

something that makes you laugh (you have to laugh, fuck, you absolutely have to find a way to laugh)

something you find interesting (science, history, puzzles, even just how it's made videos; scroll through youtube until you find a topic that you're legitimately curious about and learn something new)

something that feels comforting (your favorite movie or show, your favorite book, your favorite fic; doesn't matter if you've watched/read it a hundred times, do it again)

something totally mindless that requires your entire focus (for me that's usually a game on my phone, something like scrabble, word search, or a pop-all-the-bubbles sort of game; make sure you don't fall down a sinkhole of buying more turns and shit)

i have a distractions tag if you'd like some ideas on where to start. if you'd like a few recs of channels i like to watch when i feel shitty:

andrew rousso's skits are hilarious

liziqi lives in the chinese countryside and makes beautiful, peaceful videos of gardening, farming, and cooking. wild girl and dianxi xiaoge have similar channels.

absolute history has some fascinating in-depth videos

acrylic pours are pretty damn cool to watch

chris fleming is as unhinged as he is funny

tasting history with max miller recreates ancient recipes and discusses the history surrounding them

serena art has a cool method of painting that is very interesting to watch

caitlin reilly is painfully good at being funny

the animal cracker is a chiropractor who works on animals, including horses, which is actually really cool

for some reason i think harvesting videos are fascinating??

okay, that probably has you set for a while, lol. but i think that gives you an idea of what i find helpful, from educational to funny to just cool to look at when you can't concentrate on anything.

important part of this is staying committed to the distraction. you are a hockey goalie and you are not letting that shit through. cycle through ten different distractions if you need, just do not fall into the pit of bad thoughts. power through the worst of it.

socially: believe me, i don't love talking to people when i'm buried under a wave of despair, and i'm pretty bad at keeping in touch with friends, but make an attempt at talking to someone and either being honest about how you feel or just have a chat about nothing important, because we're social creatures and we feel better when we've been in contact with other people. even if you're just sending memes or rambling about fanfic, it helps a little bit.

okay, dear, that's my guide to holding back the tide on the Bad Thoughts. of course i could say all sorts of encouraging, inspirational stuff, but honestly when i'm in the depression hole, i don't really want to hear that stuff. simple, concrete actions help me more than promises that everything's going to be okay or i'm strong enough to handle this, blah blah. but if you do want more along that line, try my suicide tag for support and more advice.

this fucking sucks and it's okay that it fucking sucks, you don't need to paint a smiley face on a pile of shit and try to act grateful about it. just try and take care of yourself as best you're able, and don't let those thoughts gain a foothold, alright? you'll get through this, sweetheart.