#even if these social media apps are trying to censor what’s happening it’s because of them we know what’s going on

[mssi]

speak up for palestine 🇵🇸

[not-poignant]

Is it just me or is censorship all across social media getting really bad lately? Pinterest just removed a whole bunch of my pins for sexual content - they were all fully clothed queer men and women showing vague intimacy, nothing overtly sexual at all. Like one they removed was literally just two men's heads leaning on each other. That's wacko right??? Have I missed something big going on?

Tbh it's been getting increasingly terrible for a long time, anon, it's not a lately thing, it's been since before the Tumblr purge, and it is at least in some part due to the SESTA/FOSTA law that got passed in the USA, and the increasing passing of laws in many countries that are specifically concerned with removing net neutrality and treating all of us like 3 year olds.

It will get worse, not better. And you've probably been missing a few big things! It sounds like you were most directly impacted by what happened with Pinterest, so you've just noticed it. Many of us noticed it around 2018 with the Tumblr purge. Some of us have been impacted by elements of it way earlier, due to Livejournal's Strikethrough which necessitated the invention of Dreamwidth and helped to really get AO3 off the ground. And this was back even before we now have many laws that scare a lot of big companies into removing adult content.

Steve Jobs famously hated / loathed pornography and was on a mission to literally try and remove it from the internet, and part of that mission was to - as much as possible - make it nearly impossible for apps that have it to get listed in the Apple store. This is partly why AO3 doesn't have an app. This is why Dreamwidth doesn't have an app. This is why the Tumblr Purge happened - so they could continue to have an app. And while some sites don't get targeted, as soon as you do get targeted by the Apple store, it's either 'provide your legal identity to prove that you're the age you say you are' to access adult content or it's 'goodbye adult content.'

We've also had an increasing rise of morally panicked, puritanical TERF-informed anti-shippers who believe that their emotional reactions to fictional content they find troubling are firstly valid moral judgements, and secondly, a valid reason to abuse, bully and send death threats to real people. And these people basically work hand-in-hand (often without realising) with extremely powerful Evangelical Christians who have government influence and a lot of money in the USA and literally work to change laws to make it reflect an extremely puritanical vision they have of the future. You know, the homphobic, transphobic, misogynistic, racist, kinkphobic, bigoted, antisemitic etc. etc. etc. one. (It's highly ironic and tragic that most antis are young and queer and just extremely uneducated).

I'd say people notice based on what impacted them directly. So some of us realised in 2007. Some of us realised again in 2018. And since then there's been a lot of blows from a lot of sites. In a way, Pinterest is joining an already very bloated bandwagon of sites cornered in the manner. The reason why people say 'unalive' these days instead of suicide, or 'r@pe' these days instead of rape is because of Tiktok censors. The reason so many folks moved their adult fanart and art accounts off Instagram, or they've gone dead, is because of Instagram censors. The reason so many adult writers on Patreon are very careful about what explicit words they write directly onto the site is because of Patreon censorship.

After all this, it's possible that Pinterest has a bug and are implementing a new AI algorithm for detecting adult content, and it's just broken. In those cases, reporting and appealing actually often does help. When Tumblr first implemented their algorithm, it wasn't very well trained yet, and like, pictures of fruit etc. were being banned because the AI algorithm was still figuring out what to do. Tumblr was in a rush in order to keep the app in the Apple store (over 70% of their income is from app users, the site would have literally died if they didn't act quickly), and so they ended up with an extremely overzealous and initially broken (and still sometimes broken x.x) algorithm.

If Pinterest is going through something similar, either with the app store or with having to address a sudden legal change, they may be having algo problems, and reporting will help them train the algorithm better.

Trust me, there will be people behind the scenes - staff at all of these websites - who hate the changes as much as you do, even if they can't say so for professional reasons. But even the new owner of Tumblr got pretty close to saying 'it fucking sucks but we have to do it if you want the site to exist' (which honestly made it a lot more...possible to handle the change, because it's not usually the sites you have to hate/resent, but the laws getting changed around you. Also if anyone here is an adult and can do so - please vote!!!)

[p-ssypink]

guys i hate tiktok so intimately as an app. forget it's shitty interface, the fact that you can't escape ads, and what it contributes to the normalization of privacy infringement and data mining/lack of need of individual privacy for specifically minors.

TERFS DNI

what i hate is the corporate sanitization that specifically targets and silences marginalized identities to the point that we have marginalized youths spouting the same reactionary rhetoric as your run-of-the-mill right winger in a woke font. what do you mean gay as a term is only meant for homosexuals and any other use of it in the community is appropriation?

the surface implication alone that bisexual people are not queer enough to call themselves gay is astounding.

that exclusionary, gatekeeping language is the exact same language that homophobes use to persecute us. you're not going to get off the chopping block just because you try to be one of the good ones. as soon as you turn your back on your community and try to dictate the terminology people use to define themselves you are aligning yourself with heteronormative social positionings and therefore standing against everything your community has sacrificed to build this comfy little niche you're stood in to spit your vitriol onto them. you don't respect identities you don't understand so how does that make you any different from your run-of-the-mill homophobe?

it atomizes conversations about marginalized identities down to the most palatable versions of them and strips us of the agency of our language to cater to a broad user base whilst effectively sanitizing the minds of the youth who have tt as their main point of online presence by conditioning them to expect narrow language (and the narrow viewpoints that follow, because when you can't use language as broadly as it's meant to be used, the language you have left can only go so far) as a commodity.

we are actively watching a generation get desensitized to tragedy/injustice whilst being hypersensitive to the language used around them that has been accurate and appropriate language for decades (dykefag, fagdyke, whatever) because it doesn't fit into the narrow model of appropriate language provided for them, and therefore the history and existence of these identities and everything they've contributed to their community is moot because they gendered too close to the sun and you didn't like it? if you don't understand subversion of heteronormativity as a basis of your advocacy for queer people and queer bodies, you do not get to explain or gatekeep any fucking term for how somebody identifies themselves within this community.

you are happy to ignore, stigmatize, and marginalize people in your community because they exist in their identity in a way you find difficult to understand because you are more concerned with not disrupting social positionings then you are with people actually finding and creating language to describe their own identities. (gateway to Reagan applogism) if you don't understand the social positionings of queer bodies how are you ever going to advocate for yourself or your community? you don't even have the social underpinnings to begin to have a conversation about queerness.

and this applies outside of the queer community too - it applies to conversations about Palestine and the rhetoric of "From the River to the Sea, Palestine Will Be Free" being an antisemitic quote even though at it's inception it was a response to the zionist claim that "between the Sea and the Jordan there will only be Israeli sovereignty" and tiktok removing videos with the former phrase and kids jumping on the "antisemitic" bandwagon every time they hear it.

it happens with conversations about activism being more than moral grandstanding and how you have to do more than say the few buzzwords that are allowed on your censored cesspool of a preferred media site.

it happens with conversations about race everywhere on TikTok, conversations about problematic media everywhere on TikTok (we should never watch any Disney classic ever because each instance of a problem makes the media inherently bad because we shouldn't be expected to critically engage with the media we consume (HELLO?!)), conversations about genetic and ethnic diversity (hello eugenicists), whatever.

we are actively watching another corporation work in tandem with whatever body is funding them to radicalize our youth against the progress we've made in recent years by proxy of censorship and using their language against them. if we can strip the identities that these kids are "fighting for" down to consummable rot then we've already constructed the fringe groups their disgust-based moral grandstanding will allow them to turn a blind eye to's persecution. you treat your absolutism like gospel.

"furries are zoophiles" you will turn a blind eye to queer and neurodivergent persecution.

"from the river to the sea is antisemitic" you will turn a blind eye to Palestinian persecution if the two-state solution is implemented.

"black squares for BLM" you turned a blind eye to our persecution once the protests stopped.

"hillbillies/rednecks/hicks are all racists" you are turning a blind eye to the systemic disenfranchisement of a group of (typically some of the most open-minded) people because of their language/barriers to higher education.

you are more concerned about performing wokeism than advocating for the people who don't fit pretty into your politics and we are collectively cosigning this radicalization.

[luna-rainbow]

There are general elections happening in my country(Brasil) and one of the candidates suggested building an algorithm to predict crimes and stop them from happening and I was just like "Where have I seen that?" And then I remembered where I have seen that and I was like "Oh shit".

You know when I say that it's funny that life imitates art I definitely did not mean that.

Sorry this is random i just felt that I needed to share this with someone.

Thanks for dropping in Nonnie!

I have to say one of the main reasons CATWS really resonated with me (before I ever shipped Stucky or even liked Steve and Bucky much) was that particular theme.

The Chinese communist party has been trying to do this for years. Surveillance of citizens is baked into the party’s DNA from the Cultural Revolution in the 60s, where people were encouraged to monitor each other’s behaviours and report on anything “anti-revolutionary”. Unsurprisingly it led to many spiteful private disagreements turning into public spectacles of humiliation, ostracisation and executions. But from a CCP point of view, the deaths were a small price for “security” and "stability" (oh gee…that’s sounds familiar).

Technology has made this easier in so many aspects. The tools are widespread and unexpected. For example, a lot of the Chinese apps I have on my phone will load data from other apps. A lot of them also demand your hand over your real identity. For example, the JJWXC app (which I haven’t used in a while) is simply for a site that hosts a lot of original fiction (a bit like AO3), including lots of danmei, but asks that you verify your account with a real phone number. It also does this strange thing where if I open it up, iPhone will give me a notification that the app has pasted something from another app I had recently open, usually Facebook or Safari or some other social media site, even when I have NOT copied anything to clipboard. Why would a site that for all intents and purpose function like (a heavily censored) AO3 do this? Or several of the other game apps? And it only happens for Chinese apps. I don't use Tik Tok, but there's been significant concerns about what that app is collecting in terms of user data.

Phone apps give the CCP tremendous amount of data about your location (and where you stop for longer periods of the day, which allows tech companies to accurately pinpoint where your home and work/school is), which users you interact more with, how frequently or freely (and where) you spend your cash, which allows them to rapidly profile your demographic and your preferences as well as your network of people who are important to you (READ: for blackmail or extortion). Depending on the app (e.g. if you use Weibo or Wechat) there's a high chance that specific word combinations will trigger a ban, and your chat history is probably going to be stored remotely for someone to comb through. Overseas Chinese speakers famously use a string of banned words to get rid of spammers social media apps, because as soon as "sensitive words" like "64" (referring to the June 4th massacres) or "Tibetan/Taiwan/HK independence", they get kicked off the internet by their servers.

But phone apps are only the tip of the iceberg. The CCP has set up an extensive CCTV network with the technology to collect facial recognition data (I get the sense a lot of countries are quietly setting this up though) that is able to profile people into age groups and races, as well as matching them to known criminals...which might sound like a useful thing until you remember that you can very much be a political criminal by simply not agreeing with the CCP.

There's been plenty of cases where Chinese diaspora's families inside China get detained by the police for them being vocal on the international front about human rights or other political issues going on inside China. A Chinese person with a strong moral principle would not be shut down by threats to their lives, but a Chinese person whose elderly parents or vulnerable nieces and nephews are threatened may not be able to stand up against the thousands of years of filial duty and say they're still willing to step out there in the public, at the risk of damaging their family's careers or even lives.

So yes...when I say CATWS was probably the bravest the MCU has ever been...this is what I'm referring to. But the CCP wouldn't be the only government pouring resources into something like this.

[cozykali]

The Congress hearing involving the CEO of TikTok was an absolute embarrassment. They did not give the man a moment to speak after asking him ridiculous question after question.

They are claiming it has to do with privacy concerns and the fact that TikTok is owned by a company in China called ByteDance. the Xenophobia in the hearing was unbelievable.

The boomers were asking Mr. Chew questions like ‘does my phone connect to my home wifi?’ ARE YOU SERIOUS? How do we have such technologically illiterate geezers making decisions on this?

TIkTok does not collect any more data on it’s users than Google, Amazon, Meta, Facebook, Instagram, YouTube, Twitter etc. In fact, TikTok’s data is stored in serves on US soil using a company called Oracle.

The worst part about it is Mark Zuckerberg has paid off the government by lobbying over $20 Million to get them to squash his competition.

Is there misinformation and harmful images on TikTok, yea but it’s EVERYWHERE else on the internet as well. Russian and Chinese boys have infiltrated Twitter and Facebook to change the course of both American and Canadian elections. Meta (Facebook and Instagram) has sold millions of data to Cambridge Analytica.

If China wanted to harvest our data they do not need TikTok to do that. Nothing is stopping them from collecting data from Meta and there is no proof the Chinese government has even accessed data via TikTok.

I understand government officials not having acess to TikTok on their personal devices for privacy concerns but it should include ALL social media platforms.

I have made countless friends on TikTok in the past 5 years that I’ve had my account. I have learned more than I have learned in my entire adult life. You can understand more about what’s happening in the world by following independent journalist on the app than watching the main stream news. Millions of small businesses and creators make their entire living through TikTok. We can’t let them take it away.

Ironically, TikTok has been banned in China for years. All well as Facebook, YouTube, instagram, and many other social media sites. That’s because theyre a dictatorship and who censor what information their population has access to.

Here in North America we value free speach and are proud that our internet isn’t censored. If the TikTok ban goes through what will they censor next?

If you are American contact your local congress office and let them know you do not support a ban on TikTok and will not be re-electing them in the primaries if they vote in favour of banning it. We’ll be watching closely in Canada as well since we like to copy American policy.

If the TikTok ban goes through I will be deleting all of my accounts owned by Meta including Facebook, Instagram, Messager and WhatsApp as this is partially Mark Zuckerburg’s fault for lobbying to congress to try to squash his competition.

End rant.

[thatawkwardwitch]

#OcculTea

I've been seeing stuff about this conversation and I want in so here's my contribution! (questions from @ ella.harrison's Instagram)

Hi! I'm thatawkwardwitch or kit whatever you wanna call me is fine! I've been participating in the online community for about as long as I've been practicing. I sought out an online community pretty early on because I started practicing during lockdown and I desperately wanted to find people I could connect with about witchcraft. I usually reblog informational posts for beginners. When I make my own content, it's usually just little snippets of my practice. I'm still trying to find my groove here and figure out exactly what kind of space I want my blog to be.

I like sharing my practice online because I don't have a strong in-person witchcraft community. A few of my irl friends practice, but it's not something we talk about for whatever reason

I hope to learn more about other people's practices and experiences as well as to connect with other people

I really only know the online community and don't have an in-person community to compare it to, so I feel like I can't fully answer this question

I'm not primarily on Instagram, I'm mostly there just for art stuff so I'm going to skip that one. Uh oh god tik tok. I feel like TikTok is good if you want aesthetics and that's about it. As far as sharing information, the format of the app doesn't really allow for any in-depth discussion. I've seen and heard a lot of misinformation being spread and people just running with it. I like YouTube a lot though! There are good educational videos, and because the format allows for longer videos, it's great for discussing and sharing information on more complex topics. However, I feel like most people don't go to YouTube? I feel like everyone's first go-to is TikTok even though WitchTok doesn't really exist anymore. I feel as though TikTok has sort of accustomed people to being spoonfed information, so beginners are less likely to go to other sources where they actually have to work for information.

yes and no. I think it's really easy to get into a rut in your practice and just stick to consuming content instead of working through the rut. But it's not just social media. "Armchair occultists" have been around forever, as long as there have been books about it. So yes, I guess it can be a substitute, but no, in the sense that, it's not everyone. Most people I know online still practice outside of social media so I'm not sure how much of a problem it actually is

I don't share a lot about my own personal practice on social media, or irl for that matter. I've posted a few spells and those weren't fully staged but they also weren't fully reality either. Like, I actually did the spell, but I kept some parts of it offline so it couldn't be undone since it was a protection spell. As far as all the experiences I've shared, I share them as I've experienced them. I do experience psychosis so I can't say that all of them were 100% reality looking back on some earlier experiences (but I'm not sure if I've even shared those ones), but I report things as I perceived them happening to me.

I don't know shit about social media etiquette so that's definitely not a part of whether or not I share stuff. Most of the time it's personal preference not to share. I try to be very careful about asking my spiritual team what I can and cannot share. Lately, I've been trying to practice more of what chaoticwitchaunt called "moving in silence" mostly as a way to protect myself from the evil eye, but also because I've definitely gotten in trouble with my spiritual team because I've shared stuff I wasn't supposed to. In general, there definitely is censorship. Most platforms won't show or let creators talk about blood, bones, fire, etc. and then there's cancel culture. which I'm not going to go too far in depth about but people love to censor each other.

Yes. I've thankfully never encountered any, but there's gonna be grifters in any community that can be capitalized on. Because I don't have any experience with grifters, I'm not sure what all the warning signs are but definitely double-check and cross-reference people before doing business with them.

I think the best way to stop the spread of misinformation is to develop and hone your media literacy skills. Critical thinking is so important, especially in this space. Do your own research on a topic; don't just take one person's word as fact

I feel like a lot of people will look at someone with a large following and immediately assume that they're an expert, but in reality it just means that they know how to work an algorithm, a completely different skill than witchcraft.

While I don't quite consider myself a witchy content creator, I am still a content creator for fandoms/bandoms. The main thing I do to keep authenticity is to take breaks from content creation. I can't work well when I'm struggling with schoolwork or mental health. When I take a break from social media, I usually state why so my followers know what's going on, but I never try to promise content I'm not sure I can or will make

I like seeing content from other creators. I find it particularly inspiring, especially if I've gotten stuck in my own practice or if I've fallen out of a daily routine. It's motivation to keep practicing.

I don't think I've ever let FOMO get me to the point where I've been taken advantage of. I guess I got lucky where all my beginning resources stressed the importance of not needing tools, so it really stuck in my head. I don't think I've ever purchased anything because of FOMO.

Unfortunately, yes. The main way that FOMO gets me is when I see people who have been brought up practicing or people who have easy access to their ancestral practices. As someone who's trying to reconnect, when I see other people who have reconnected or are further along in the process, I do feel a bit bad and frustrated with where I'm at, but it is something I am working on. I don't want it to prevent me from practicing

I haven't really experienced imposter syndrome in this area of my life yet. And I think that's just because I don't have a huge online witchy presence. But because I've experienced imposter syndrome in other areas of my life, one of the things I use to fight it, is to remind myself of all the work I've done to get to where I am

Oh god. I think I'd be Wiccan and I'm not saying it like it's a bad thing but most of my early books on witchcraft were written by Wiccan authors. If I didn't have online media, those Wiccan sources would be all I had because that's what my dad reads. I'm sure eventually, I would have found my way to Christian Witchcraft, but I think I would have never worked with the Norse gods and I would have missed all their lessons. Because my dad is into Gnosticism and Wicca, without online resources, I don't think I would have ever explored other routes

I think having an in person community is far more fruitful than an online one. Not that online spaces can't be important, but there's only so much connection you can get from behind a screen

Like I said above, I don't think I would have gone down the path I did if I didn't have an online community. It's how I learned about ancestor veneration, and folk magic, and it gave me a reading list outside of the stuff my dad reads.

I think the biggest danger to the capitalization of witchcraft is the appropriation of closed cultures and practices

I have not, and I don't know anyone who's been personally affected (to my knowledge)

Yes. If people are providing you services that they worked hard on, they should be compensated for their work. While I think knowledge should be readily accessible in general, it is still important to protect that knowledge as well as people's time and efforts. Especially in the world we live in where everything costs money. If people are providing a service, it's almost a necessity that they be duly compensated

Again, cross-reference and double-check everything

I wish people would talk more about how to do research. We're always telling people to do the research, but as I'm finding out just from group projects in college, most people don't know how to do research. And I think I'll make a quick and dirty guide to research at some point because this is something that's been bugging me for a while

I feel like I just need to interact more. I do a lot of lurking so I feel like my needs will be met once I start interacting

Honestly, I don't know. I think assuming the best out of people, not to the point of naivety but assuming good intentions.

Again assuming good intentions.

chaoticwitchaunt on YouTube is the main person I go to. Seeking Witchcraft (podcast) was a vital source for me as a beginner. I also like The Red Text (podcast) as well

I'd just encourage my mutuals and followers to comment and share their own experiences. I really want to be more engaged in this community so this is an attempt at doing so <3

[arizonaconservativegal]

This may sound dumb but are you concerned about people being censored online if views are conservative? Like do you think people will be put on a list? I’ll repeat it may be dumb but just curious if you have thoughts on it.

Honestly, there are very few things that scare me politically as much as censorship does. Taking the president of the United States off social media is wholly inappropriate, no matter who they are, or what party they're from, or what they have to say.

But what scares me more than that is what is happening to Parler.

The argument has always been "well, Facebook and Twitter are private companies and if you don't like how they run their platforms, you can go somewhere else." And I've largely gone along with that because I'm a free market kind of person (although I've always had concerns about the barriers to entry that exist for new social media sites trying to join the market, but that's another story). Except now that conservatives have tried to go somewhere else, Google and Apple have taken the app out of their stores so people no longer have the choice to download it. Worse, Amazon is no longer hosting Parler's website, which means you can't even go around the app restrictions by using the site in your browser.

Parler will probably find someone else to host their site, but how long will that last before Google or Apple decide to block the website for anyone using Chrome or Safari browsers?

And where do we go from there?

How long until cable companies drop Fox News?

How long until Visa and Mastercard don't let you use your credit/debit card to donate to conservative campaigns online?

How long until airlines no longer let you fly if you voted the wrong way?

These all sounded ridiculous to me a month ago. But there is serious talk of dropping Fox. Visa and Mastercard nearly shut down Pornhub that way. The flight attendants' union is demanding that even the actual peaceful protesters who did not enter the capitol are banned from their airlines.

I really try not to be an alarmist about politics, but we are in a really scary place right now and I don't see it getting better any time soon.

[actualaster]

Hello! I am sorry to bother about this, but could you explain what is going on on this tag ban, please? I came back from Christmas and I am not sure got it right.

From what I read around who have ios have a new ban, is that it? I also some lists and random words were there like g1rl and is that true??

I am sorry to bother you, I am really confused.

Thank you !

No worries!

I'll do my best!

First, be aware that this is brand new and confusing to all of us, so there's a lot of uncertain and wrong info because we're learning as we go since this was JUST implemented.

So, here's what we know

Apple is doing something with content guidelines, basically what you're allowed to include in your app if you want it on the app store

Tumblr has to comply with these guidelines if they don't want their app yanked

In order to comply, Tumblr has created a rather long list of tags that will simply not show up on iOS devices using the app (though they're largely accessible via Android using the app, desktop, or using a non-safari browser to use the mobile version of the website)

Tumblr Staff has claimed this is a temporary intermediary measure and they're working on better solution

The list contains everything from actual words inarguably linked with pr0n, s3lf-h4rm, graphic violence/g0r3, etc. to nonsensical stuff like qu3u3, as well as a number of disturbing entries like r4c1sm and d3pr3ssi0n.

Any blog marked sensitive--even if it was incorrectly flagged--is no longer viewable at ALL via iOS app

People are employing a variety of workarounds such as 1337, alternative wording, straight up not tagging, and using a "." at the end of a tag (as of answering this ask, these work--don't know if that will be changed)

This is NOT the first time such purges have happened and is especially not the first time they've hit tags used by people such as disabled folks and PoC and other marginalized groups to discuss day to day life and challenges we face.

Anything beyond this is speculation, or relies on user reporting.

Some folks have reported being shadowbanned--that is, they cannot be tagged and you cannot search for them or see their posts in tags even if those tags are permitted. (As I have seen ay least one major blog that is generally quite trustworthy reporting this, and Tumblr has absolutely done this in the past, I'm inclined to believe this is occurring at least in some instances but don't know if it's directly linked with the tag censor or just bad timing)

It is currently unknown which, if any, words will get you shadowbanned if you use them in the body of a post rather than simply in the tags--hence one reason you may be seeing a resurgence of 1337 and other workarounds.

There are a variety of theories floating around about why it happened, including "pr0nbots interact with popular posts so they just nuked popular tags instead of trying to solve the pr0nbot issue", "somebody during the apple review process found pr0n when searching the tags", "certain content such as r4c1sm discussion isn't considered family-friendly", "they just banned the most filtered tags", etc.

Due to previous content purges and tag bans (which are cross-platform), a number of us are concerned that at least some of these tags will end up permablocked regardless of which method of accessing Tumblr you use

The banned tags seem to shift to a degree, some getting added or removed. (Some of them have been banned for much longer but it's only more widely being discovered now)

Some users have reported certain tags no longer accessible when using non-iOS app methods to access. It's unclear if these were newly added cross-platform, if the site is just bugging out again, or if they're actually tags that are from previous purges and people are only just now realizing it's banned

So basically it's the latest wave of the ongoing surface-sanitization of the internet which we've seen across a variety of other social media websites, and we don't know yet what will be permanent and what won't and there is a lot of anger and resentment because for the longest time--despite previous purges--Tumblr was sort of the last safe haven where you didn't need to employ these sorts of workarounds to avoid getting in trouble.

All it's doing is incentivizing making it harder for people who need to filter tags by causing people to use difficult to read tags, weird alternatives, or just entirely not tagging at all.

It's a mess, and we won't know the full fallout until we hear from Staff again.

[readyplayerhobi]

Flower | 16

; Hoseok x Reader

; Genre: Fluff, slight angst

; Warnings: Mention of car accident/death/depression

; Word Count: 5k

; Synopsis: You finally decide to take a dip into the world of online dating and find the Flower dating app. One of the top matches for you proves to be a guy who looks to be your complete opposite; tattooed, pierced, a metalhead and oh…incredibly handsome. What happens when you throw caution to the wind and reach out to him?

; A/N: Thanks for keeping with me after the hiatus! There may be another next week but for now, here’s part 16 :) I hope you all enjoy, please reblog if you do so that others can see it as well! Leave me comments and asks, I love to talk about this world with you all!’

; Flower Masterpost

-

It’s a rather novel concept, you think to yourself wryly as you watch the way Hoseok runs his palms along the length of thighs once more, trying to wipe away his anxiety. You don’t think you’ve ever seen Hoseok look like this nervous or unsure of himself in the whole six months you’ve been dating him.

You’re currently driving over to your parents, having accepted their offer of dinner. Normally you’d just go by yourself, but this Saturday your parents had explicitly invited you to bring Hoseok. He’d agreed, obviously, but he’d been a little hesitant. Even you knew that meeting the parents was a big step in a relationship.

While being nervous yourself to introduce him to them properly, you also felt that it was the right time for it. You loved your parents and they’d always been so supportive of you, no matter what you’d decided to do in life. It only made sense for you to finally introduce the man who made you smile just at the thought of him.

Despite that, you were still worried about everything because you desperately wanted them to like him. Their approval meant a lot to you and knowing that they thought he was a good match was equally as important to you as him liking them. But you’d never brought any guy home before, or anyone really. Never even really mentioned dating to them to be honest.

You’d always been shy around that kind of stuff, only dating and all of that in college where you could almost be anonymous amongst the large student body. So for you to bring home Hoseok meant that he was special, very special. And they knew it too. But you just didn’t know how you were meant to act with them or him, or what the protocols were for bringing home your partner.

Unfortunately for you, Hoseok had no idea either. You’d been both surprised and yet not to find out he’d never met a girlfriend’s parents before. It was something you supposed that you’d expected given who he was and what he’d told you of his past. He’d never dated seriously enough to warrant meeting parents so he was in the same boat of uncertainty as you.

Only...the Hoseok who had been a rock for you in the murkiness of your life and mind these last few months had suddenly needed a rock in turn. His lack of experience in this department combined with his need to make sure he makes a good impression for both you and him meant that he’d taken on the role of nervous and awkward person in your relationship.

Which considering the fact that you were currently experiencing a downward slide in your own mental health, the exhilarating happiness of the last few months finally catching up to you and sending you back down the road of depression and severe anxiety, was impressive. But it was proving a great distraction away from the way you were slumping backwards in your mood, letting you focus instead on Hoseok.

He’d spent all of last night being very quiet, his thoughts evidently far away and he’d asked you about a million questions about your parents. You’d thought it was all very sweet of him to be so worried but at the same time, you were hoping he’d get back to being his bright self because it was starting to make you worry a little too.

And he was being very serious about it all as well because even sex hadn’t been able to take his mind off it for too long. Your magnificent boyfriend had finally, finally managed to make you orgasm during sex a week or so ago and he’d been beyond proud of himself that he’d done it.

You’d thought that giving him a goal to achieve to make himself feel better would be good, and of course you got an added benefit from that...

But last night, he’d been okay for exactly half an hour before he’d cuddled up to you and began querying you once more. You hadn’t got annoyed at him though, because you knew he was just genuinely worried about how they might take him. Seeing him in your pictures on social media and hearing you talk about him is one thing, but meeting him is another thing entirely.

Hoseok’s opinion of himself was that he was a tattooed, pierced metalhead with a long history of sexual escapades and plenty of wild drunken nights. Not what most parents wanted for their daughter to date, especially when said daughter was so socially introverted and easy to hurt.

Your efforts to soothe his worries hadn’t really worked, so now you just supposed that he had to be shown that your parents would like him. There was no doubt in your mind that they would, because despite all of the things he was worried about himself for, he had one thing going for him that perhaps the most important thing of all.

He made you happy and he made you smile. 

You knew that they would give him more than enough chances to prove himself because of those two facts alone, because they knew more than anyone how hard you struggled to make friends and how romance had been almost a foreign term to you. So to meet the man that had finally managed to show you what a relationship could and should be was high on their list.

Pulling into the drive behind your dad’s car, you look out at the small house that you’d grown up in. It’s nothing big or fancy, one of the smaller houses in this neighbourhood of working class people really. The paint on the awnings was chipped and fading while the railing on the porch sagged a little from the weight of its age. 

Even your dad’s car in front of you showed more than enough signs of wear and tear. His job as an engineer at a car manufacturer was based half an hour away from here, with most of that down the highway. It had paid enough to keep the house going along with the car but most of his salary and your moms had gone to paying for your college fees.

Only now were they finally able to properly save up for themselves, hoping to buy a house that was a little nicer than the one they had now. Eyeing the lawn out front, you sighed as you saw it was starting to look overgrown with more than a few patches looking brown and the mailbox was beginning to lean to the side.

“I should come home more often,” You muse out loud to yourself, taking the keys out of the ignition and pressing the button on your seat belt holder. “Help my parents out with the chores and stuff.”

Hoseok looks around as well and you hope that he’s not disgusted or anything by your childhood home. You know that his parents are much better off than your own but he’s never shown himself to be a snobby person or anything.

“Well if you want to, I can come too? I mean...if they want me to. I can help do any manual work if they need it?” Smiling, you reach up and tap his cheek fondly with your palm and internally cheer as he gives you a smile in response.

“I’d like that, you're good with your hands. Just don’t let them take no for an answer then. My parents are wonderful people who deserved far more in life than they got, but they’re still proud. They’ll accept our help as long as we don’t make out that it’s help, you know?” He nods, looking thoughtful before letting out a deep sigh.

Giving him a once over, you get out of the car and wait for him to do the same, locking it behind you before making your way up the path of broken and cracked flagstones. Hoseok’s hand around your wrist stops you suddenly as he pulls at you slightly and you turn, frowning when you see the worry on his face.

“What if they don’t like me? Should I have worn something different?” He asks, for possibly the tenth time today and you internally sigh before facing him fully. His outfit today is just like any other; black jeans with rips and a band shirt with his usual leather jacket slung over the top. Only his hair looks slightly different and that’s because he’s been running his hands through it anxiously.

Placing your hands on his waist, you stroke them up and down reassuringly before giving him a big smile. Hoseok pauses for a moment before his arms wrap around you in turn, causing you to hug him back tightly with your cheek mashed against his warm chest.

“You’ll be okay Hoseok, honestly. I’ve told you enough times and I’m positive you’re gonna find out I’m right. I’m the most awkward one in my family so if you can win me over then you’ll do fine. Please just be yourself because you’re one of the most outgoing and charismatic people I’ve ever seen.” He eyes you carefully before he chews at his lip ring.

You’d had to convince him to keep that in, along with his tongue piercing because he’d wanted to take them out to make a better impression. But you wanted your parents to meet the Hoseok you knew and adored so much, not one that censored himself.

“Okay. Yeah, okay. Sorry.” Muttering the words, you see the frown on his own face and lean forward, catching his attention once more as you press your lips to his in a sweet kiss. One arm moves from around his body to cup his cheek, thumb stroking gently and when you pull away, you see him looking a little calmer.

Moving backwards, you reach down and grab his hand in yours, pulling him along the short path with a bright smile. “Come on mister, I’ve got a surprise for you that you’re gonna love.” 

You hear Hoseok’s confused noise behind you, wondering what on earth you’re on about when you bounce up the stairs to the porch and open the front door of your parents house. Almost immediately you hear the scurrying of paws and crouch down with open arms as a furry dog comes barreling out of the living room, barking excitedly.

“Hello baby girl!” You coo to the golden retriever who almost knocks you over in her enthusiasm, tail wagging wildly as she pushes her nose into your face and tries to climb into your non existent lap. Laughing, you stroke her head before standing up and turning to Hoseok. That’s all the cue she needs to begin investigating him, tail going just as hard as she sniffs him all over.

You can’t help but laugh loudly at his face when she shoves her nose in his crotch and you reach down to grab her collar, tugging her inside gently while Hoseok closes the door behind you both. Kicking off your shoes and placing them onto the shoe rack, you watch as Hoseok does the same before he crouches down as well, a bright smile on his face as he holds his hand out for her to smell.

“This is Harley. She’s an old girl now but we had a lot of fun times when I was in high school. Isn’t that right eh? You were my best friend back then.” Ruffling her fur, you laugh as she drops to the floor and presents her belly, pushing her nose into Hoseok’s hand in her need to get as much attention as physically possible.

“You didn’t tell your parents owned a dog.” Hoseok’s tone is almost accusatory and you grin mischievously. 

“Didn’t tell you because I know you love dogs and I wanted her to be a surprise. She’s been a very long lived retriever, she’s actually 13 now and we got her when I was 13 but she’s still the furry ball of love she always was.” Running your fingers through the golden fur that didn’t quite feel as soft as it once had, you give a sad smile.

You know that there will be a day when your parents call to say that she wasn’t here anymore, but you also knew that she’d had such a long and wonderful life that you’d be okay with that fact. For now though, you were going to give her plenty of pets and love. And looking at Hoseok as he beams, leaning down to almost press his face to hers while all the tension he’d been holding leaves him, you know that he’ll do the same.

“If you’re not careful, you’re gonna send her into a coma of love.” Your dad says and you look up with a big grin at the sight of him, giving Harley one last stroke before standing and moving over to him. He’s dressed casually as usual, just black sweatpants and a plain black t-shirt with those grey wool socks he loves to wear covering his feet.

“Hi. And you know she loves it.” Turning, you watch as Hoseok gives Harley another pet before standing up slowly. It almost breaks your heart how nervous and shy he looks, his hands come around to clasp together at his front while his gaze steadfastly doesn’t meet your dads.

Moving over to him, you wrap your hand around his arm and look back at your dad, noting that your mom has arrived too. She’s just in some plain grey lounge pants with a graphic t-shirt with Toothless the dragon on it. You’d told them to be casual with Hoseok, hoping if they just dressed like they normally would in the house then he wouldn’t get too stressed immediately.

“Mom, dad, this is Hoseok. My...err.” You find yourself freezing as you try to introduce him, the word you’re trying to say almost getting stuck in your throat and you frown in annoyance at yourself. God, you couldn’t even do this right.

Hoseok saves you though, taking a deep breath before giving them his most charming smile, the one that wins over just about anyone who sees it. “I’m Jung Hoseok, her boyfriend. It’s nice to meet you.”

You can tell by the twitch in his arm that he wants to hold out a hand for a handshake or something but you keep a tight grip on him, thinking that’d probably just be too formal and strange. He was meeting your parents, not the President of the United States.

“Hi Hoseok, Y/N’s told us a lot about you.” Your dad says, nothing negative in his voice as he scans over Hoseok before giving him a brief smile. The relief you feel as you sense that Hoseok has passed the visual test at least that your parents are no doubt giving him right now is palpable.

“She has! Come in, come in. Both of you. Do you want to take your jacket off?” This comes from your mom now, her tone telling him that even though it was a question, he should probably obey. Sure enough, Hoseok hears that and acknowledges it, giving a gracious smile before shrugging out of his jacket and handing it to her when she reaches for it.

Gently, you push Hoseok through to the living room and direct him to a seat that won’t be occupied. You weren’t sure about other households, but yours always had assigned seating based on people’s preferences on the couch. 

Your dad took the end of the couch, your mom always took the bit that stuck out so she could almost lay down and you always sat in the armchair. But for today, you sat on the couch and watched as your dad sat in the armchair. Hoseok carefully sat next to you and as he did so, you placed your hand on his thigh and rubbed it gently.

“You okay?” You whisper quietly and he nods in response, his hand moving to grasp yourself and thread your fingers together. Harley is there mere moments later, pushing her face as close as she can get without actually climbing onto you both and you smile as Hoseok lets out a quiet laugh, his free hand moving to stroke her gently.

“Was your drive over okay? Is your car still making that noise?” Glancing away from Harley, you look at your dad with raised brows before nodding to him.

“Yeah it was fine, there was no traffic really which is why we’re a bit early. And it doesn’t seem to be doing it now? You can’t look though, Hoseok let me drive his.” Your dad liked to mess around with cars and you knew that given enough chance, he’d have been outside looking over your car already if you’d had it. It was the same car that you’d been driving since high school and it had been old even back then. Now, you were positive that you probably wouldn’t even be able to sell it anymore.

You knew damn well that Hoseok didn’t like it. His own car wasn’t new or anything but it was only five years old. Which meant it was less of a potential death trap than your own car was. He wasn’t hugely territorial about it and you’d driven it a few times already. It wasn’t much to admit that you loved driving it compared to yours.

“Ahh, you should bring it next time and let me have a look at it for you, flower. Although ideally, I hope you can afford to get a new one soon. I don’t like the idea of you driving that around, especially in winter.” Pouting at him, you play with Hoseok’s fingers before shrugging.

“I’d love to buy a new one dad, but I can’t. I am saving though, so I can at least buy one that's only a few years old soon enough. I’ve got my eye on a nice looking Hyundai that’s not too expensive, only four years old and some good mileage too.” He eyes you, lips pursing out before he’s pulling out his smartphone.

“Is there a link online?” Rolling your eyes, you take his phone and bring up the listing for the Hyundai you’d been keeping tabs on for the last month. You put away money each month into your savings account, hoping that you’d eventually one day get enough to put down a deposit on a house or something but you knew that you’d need a new car much sooner.

And you could almost afford to buy this car.

“Your dad calls you flower?” Hoseok whispers to you, smiling in amusement as you sit back, acknowledging the irony of your childhood nickname. Looking up at him, you chuckle and nod in acknowledgement, watching as your mom gets up to head into the kitchen.

“Do you want a drink Hoseok?” She gives you a questioning look as well as you ask for a Coke, watching as Hoseok panics for a moment as he wonders what would be the best to drink to ask for. Grinning, you squeeze his hand affectionately and look back at your mom.

“You can have a beer if you want? I’m driving so I don’t mind.” You can see the wide eyed look of shock from Hoseok, the shock likely that you’re encouraging him to drink and possibly perpetuate his stereotype of being a heavy drinking metalhead. But you know your parents, so you just reassure him with a smile.

“Err...yeah, I mean...yes please. A beer would be nice, if you have one.” That gets a snort from your dad as your mom disappears, returning a minute later with your can of Coke and an opened bottle of Hoseok’s favourite beer. Watching intently, you can’t help but laugh at the confused look on his face as he accepts it carefully.

“Y/N told us what your favourite drink is. We wanted to make you a bit more comfortable.” 

It’s only then that Hoseok’s eyes narrow as he looks at you, lifting your hands up to gently push at your nose until you’re giggling at him, biting your lower lip. He doesn’t say anything though, simply takes a sip of beer before turning and giving your mom a gracious smile.

“Thank you. You didn’t have to-” He goes to say something else but your dad makes a noise, looking up at you both before gesturing to Hoseok sternly.

“We make sure our guests are comfortable in this house. It might not be much to look at, but we always look after our guests. Especially when they mean so much to Y/N.” Glancing at you, his gaze turns back to Hoseok whose cheeks flush slightly, his own gaze dropping from your dads to the neck of his bottle.

Well...you had told him that they were still proud people. 

Scooting forward, you slide off the sofa to situate yourself on the plush carpeted floor of the living room, making fussing noises to Harley who has stretched herself out on the floor in front of you. As you busy yourself with playing with your dog, you don’t notice the way your parents watch Hoseok in turn as he watches you.

“Y/N says that you’re in IT right? And you got that promotion the other month?” You don’t bother to look up, knowing that Hoseok can handle himself and trusting your parents to be as nice to him as they are to everyone else they’ve ever met. 

“Err, yeah. I err, I lead another team. It’s a little hard to describe as we have multiple sites but I’m now like, the manager of two of them. The bonus is more pay and responsibility, which will hopefully be good for my career. The downside is I’m busier...and more responsibility means more stress.” Leaning back against his leg, you look up at him from the floor.

“You’re doing good though. You manage your stress way better than I do.” You can’t quite see him properly from this angle but you do see his smile, pushing your head into his hand a little as he runs his fingers along your cheek.

“That’s debatable. I just...learnt a long time ago some coping methods to deal with it. I was in therapy throughout college. My sister died in a car accident and I developed some very unhealthy coping mechanisms afterwards for a few years. Therapy helped me and it still helps me today thankfully.” Without even realising it, you have one hand gripping onto his calf in an effort to soothe any upset he may have.

You still find it amazing how easily he’ll talk about his sister’s accident but you’re beyond thankful that he’s willing to open himself up like that to your parents. By being honest about such a traumatic event for him so young, he was showing them that he was more than just what he looked like. You hadn’t told him to tell them that story, nor had you even hinted at it. But you assumed that’s what he was doing.

Sure enough, your parents warm right up to him and begin asking him questions about not only his work but his life. And you get to spend the next few hours watching in pleasure as Hoseok relaxes in their company, becoming more like the Hoseok you’ve come to know and enjoy over the last few months.

You’re pretty positive your mom has been won over solely by his personality and good looks while your dad is more fascinated with Hoseok’s skills with computers. That and his tattoos. Hoseok had given you another betrayed look when your dad had shown him the tattoo on his upper left arm and you could almost hear the ‘you never told me’ in his eyes.

All in all though, it went very well and your own anxiety about introducing them all together ebbed away slowly as the evening went on. The dinner your mom cooked was delicious and you were beyond happy that she’d given you a bunch of leftovers in tupperware for your freezer. Hoseok had been equally ecstatic when she’d given him some too, though he’d handed them over to you given that he spent most of his time at yours.

You were positive that hadn’t gone unnoticed by them.

Finally though, it was 10pm and you were getting tired, head lolling on Hoseok’s shoulder as the television played out the film you’d all been watching. Harley was laid on your feet, keeping them warm and you could have happily just fallen asleep right there, content with your boyfriends arm around you and the gentle chatter of your parents.

But Hoseok was gently shaking you awake, an amused smile on his lips before he pressed them to your temple in a gentle kiss. “This is becoming a habit, miss.”

His teasing was light and gentle, but you just gave him a smile back, wiping at your eyes before blinking rapidly to wake them up. You hadn’t worn any makeup today, not seeing the need given all three people in this house had seen you without it plenty of times. 

One of the benefits that you hadn’t considered before was that Hoseok was eager to take your pictures, meaning that he’d volunteered himself to be your photographer and editor for your makeup Instagram. Now your pictures looked even better and it was all thanks to him and his fancy camera, but you knew that despite how much he liked your makeup, he preferred the natural girl he got to see most often.

“Mom, dad, we’re gonna head off now. Thank you for dinner and all the leftovers. And the cookies mom. I appreciate it all and I’m sure Kasumi will love her special homemade cat treats,” Your mom loved Kasumi and wanted to get a cat of her own. Whenever Harley went, you knew that she’d probably get a puppy and a kitten so they could grow up together. “But it’s late and I want to go to bed.”

Stretching, you grunt as your shirt rides up and Hoseok pokes your ribs gently, mischief present in his eyes and you scowl at him before poking at his stomach. Trust him to be wide awake while you’re a bit sleepy. Though he’s ever so slightly glassy eyed from the alcohol, meaning you need to wake up a bit more to drive home.

“You’re welcome, you know we love having you home. We loved meeting you too Hoseok and you’re welcome here anytime as well. With or without Y/N,” You can just imagine Hoseok’s face behind you right now. “We’re pretty open as you can tell and if you ever need us for anything, please just ask.”

“Okay mom, let’s not freak him out anymore okay? Thank you both, I’ll bring my car over soon dad.” Tugging on your shoes, you stand and slip your arms into the jacket Hoseok is holding up for you before bending down and fussing Harley.

“Don’t bother, I’ll give you what you’re missing for that Hyundai-” He holds his hand up when you go to protest, not wanting his charity but you know you’re not going to win given his stern look. “Given how much money we’ve put into that car you have now over the years, I’ll feel better just giving you this for that car and having the peace of mind to know you’re safe. So I’ll transfer it over to you and then I want you to go buy it. Don’t let yourself get ripped off flower, make sure you test drive it first and ask for a full history. Check it all out. Take Hoseok if you have to. I wish it wasn’t like this but you know that they’re less likely to be dicks if there’s a guy there. Especially one that looks like this.” 

With that, he puts a hand on Hoseok’s shoulder and grins. Your boyfriend eyes him for a moment before giving an answering nod, shrugging on his own leather jacket once your dad lets go of him.

“I’ll make sure she doesn’t get ripped off. Though she doesn’t need me to take care of her.” He looks at you then, lips quirked up in the corner before he kisses your forehead. “She’s got her homelife put together much better than me.”

“Yeah, that’s right dad. You hear that? I’m doing good. Not having to survive on ramen noodles or anything.” You grin, walking out of the door and turning round to accept the bag of leftover food your mom gives you. Hoseok heads over to the car, opening the passenger door before letting his arms rest on top of it.

“Yeah, sometimes she even makes box pasta.” Glaring at him, you point at him until he gets an innocent look and lifts up both hands, palm out before getting in the car. “That’s right mister, you just wait.”

“I like him.” Your dad says quietly, attracting your attention back to him and you grin, warmth and happiness overflowing inside you at his words. He can’t have any idea how much that means to you, to know that he approves of Hoseok.

“Me too. He’s nice and he obviously cares a lot about you. You’re happy right?” Nodding, you feel hot with embarrassment at the personal conversation with them and your mom laughs softly, reaching out and running her thumb over your cheek. “That’s all we want for you. Now go on, he’s looking impatient.”

“He just wants to see Kasumi, he loves her.” That makes both your parents laugh and you smile in turn, waving to them both as you head down the path to the car. Looking at Hoseok as he waves at your parents as well once you’re in the car, seat belt clicked into place and engine on, you let out a tiny sigh of relief.

One half of the meeting the parents completed. Now just for the other half.

[idabackwardsintherain]

I've been using social media, in one form or another, for nearly twenty years. I've been on message boards, mailing lists that were actually used for making friends, online pen pal ("keypal") groups, Geocities, Xanga, MySpace, Facebook, Yahoo Groups, Bebo, VampireFreaks, Livejournal, Blogspot, Blogger, Formspring, Instagram, Amino, and probably some more I can't even remember.

Within two weeks on Tiktok, I witnessed more antisemitism than I'd seen in the last two decades.

(If hearing descriptions of this antisemitism will be triggering, this is your cue to scroll past this post.)

There are people who deny the Holocaust, people who say it didn't happen but they wish it had, and people who say it should happen again. There are people who say "6 million wasn't enough" (often abbreviated to 6MWE) or other jokes about the number of Shoah victims. There are white nationalists and white supremacists who use neonazi dogwhistles like 14/88. Jews who explicitly say "I support Palestinians" are called liars, dirty, scum. There are people commenting "lol good" on posts about antisemitic hate crimes, and frequently claim that the hate crime in question was "just antizionist, not antisemitic" even if it had nothing whatsoever to do with Zionism. One guy posted a bunch of videos of himself playing Grand Theft Auto and getting out to gun down any NPC dressed in traditional Chasidic clothing, continuing to shoot even once they were down, and saying he was proud to be killing the "Zionist scum". There are people using (((echoes))) to indicate Jews, spreading antisemitic conspiracy theories, and using 👃 as a shorthand for "Jew". There are codes beyond 14/88, such as 6MWE ("6 million wasn't enough"), references to 109/"make it 110" (the idea that "Jews have been kicked out of 109 countries so they must be doing something wrong"/"let's kick them out again to make it 110"), "wooden doors" (a Holocaust denial meme), and so on.

Jews are called baby-killers, asked how many babies they've killed, told that by simply existing (even if they have zero connection to the State of Israel) they are causing Palestinian children to die. People claim Jews torture children to drain them of adrenochrome, then crush up their remains and put it in McDonald's burgers. That's basically a modern-day version of blood libel, but I have seen actual traditional blood libel repeated unironically. People say Jews are child-molesters and Judaism condones child abuse. They say that Judaism teaches that gentiles are cattle and that Jews plan to enslave them all. They say Jews are "the biggest anti-white group" and plan to "destroy the white race". They say Jews control the economy and the government and the media, and use the term "elites" as a dogwhistle to refer to Jews. They sexualise Jewish women's bodies in demeaning, racialised ways, while also mocking Jews of all genders for being "ugly". They either say Jews aren't white and are plotting to destroy the white race, or they say Jews are all white (ignoring all Jews of colour) and trying to co-opt the anti-racism movement to oppress people of colour by making it all about themselves. They say Jews have a victim complex and aren't really oppressed. They say Jews invented and/or exaggerated the Holocaust in order to extort money from guilty Western nations. They say being Jewish is a choice, so if you don't want to experience hate crimes, you should just stop being Jewish. They say nobody would know you were Jewish unless you told them, so it's your fault if you experience antisemitism because you should just not tell anybody. They call people kikes, zios, hook-noses, rats (I got called a "juden rat" this week!), demons, pigs, goblins, oven-dodgers. They leave comments like "zey are in ze attic" and other Holocaust jokes. Videos Jews post can get shadowbanned or removed entirely for just using the word "Nazi" or "antisemitism", while actual Nazi content is left up. One guy uploaded a video blaming Jews for every major world event and tragedy for the last 150 years, and it was evaluated as "not violating Community Guidelines", but people responding to it to explain why it was wrong did get censored. Sometimes the app will actually just censor the word "Jew" itself.

Even though most Jews acknowledge that it is entirely possible for some Jews to have white privilege and recognise that Jews of colour are targeted more explicitly, there are a lot of people who tell Jews who are (or pass as) white that they should shut up about antisemitism because nobody can tell they're Jewish and Jews of colour are the only ones who are ever targeted. They say that it's just "white tears" to say you're scared of the neo-Nazis at the Capitol riot, the congresswoman who quoted Hitler there, the evangelical Christians who used Jewish symbols and led the public to believe the whole thing was a "Zionist" conspiracy, the man with the "Camp Auschwitz staff" shirt. They weaponise the trauma experienced by Jews of colour to make their own political points while ignoring (and even blocking) actual Jews of colour. They promote conspiracy theories like the Khazar hypothesis, claiming that Jews are actually just European identity thieves who stole a Middle Eastern culture. They accuse Jews of colour of upholding white supremacy by not rejecting Jews who descend from the diaspora in Europe. They say antisemitism against Jews isn't real because "they're not true Semites"/"they're not the only Semites", so Jews are the real antisemites because every single one of them personally oppresses Palestinians.

They defend the Messianic movement (the self-styled "Messianic Jews" who are actually evangelical Christians) and say Jews are bigots if they don't accept Messianics. They defend the appropriation and bastardisation of Judaism and Jewish culture, which they claim to understand far better than Jews themselves. For instance, they like to lecture Jews about what the Tanakh and Talmud actually say, and refuse to be told otherwise.

The best part is that half the time, in the very same comment section where all of this is happening, there are other people saying "you're making that up. Nobody says things like that."

[floatingcatacombs]

Evaluting Gatchaman Crowds Through Rui’s Outfits

12 Days of Aniblogging 2020, Day 1

Oh, I’m fashionably late to this one. Gatchaman Crowds is a 2013 superhero anime that serves as a soft reboot of the old tokusatsu franchise, only now with 21st century shitty anime tropes. From this painfully generic setup emerges a surprisingly layered evaluation of technological disruption in the smartphone era. For this reason, Crowds is a favorite amongst anime bloggers as a superhero work that’s actually trying to do something interesting.

Unfortunately I don’t care about any of these guys

But it’s also a favorite amongst all sorts of weirdos because of the character Rui Ninomiya. A horrifying amalgamation of the technolibertarian CEO and trans femme hacker archetypes, Rui is by far the most interesting character in the show, because they’re a surprisingly prescient look at how the tech industry will function throughout the 2010s. But they’re also a ‘boy’ who never leaves their house without dressing in the most girly clothes imaginable. Predictably, this is catnip for me. But the funniest part of the whole situation is that nobody ever addresses it. Rui never provides an explanation for their outfits and the rest of the cast just uses she/her until they properly get acquainted and switch to he/him.

I could tell you that Rui’s obviously trans and wrap up the post right there, but that’s honestly not the most interesting angle of attack here. So I’m just going to use whatever pronouns I feel like in the moment for them and focus on what really matters: fashion! Rui has a surprisingly large wardrobe throughout the show, so I’ll be doing the heavy lifting of ranking each of her outfits. Oh, and also maybe a little analysis of what she represents. Spoilers for the whole show, of course.

7. The Yellow Dress

Let me lay out Rui’s ideology before I lay into their fashion disaster. You see, they’re a tech disruptor who believes that governments and bureaucracies are too slow to achieve the monumental (yet unspecified) change that society needs. So, they preside over a smartphone app called GALAX that successfully predicts Pokemon Go’s geosocial AR gimmick three years early. GALAX is a technolibertarian’s wet dream – crowdsourced emergency response, interest-based meetups, and matchmaking for people who need specific help and the people who can help them, all deeply gamified.

Their outfit here is about as messy as their politics, but at the same time, what a look. She’s got blue-and-white-striped programming thigh highs on under her combat boots, which are both such trans iconography, you know? While they may just be a reflection of early-2010s 4chan crossdressing culture, it’s also totally possible that Rui directly influenced or reinforced trans girl fashion, like the accelerationist she is. What a prescient show, in all sorts of weird ways.

6. Lace-up Dress with Bunny Ears

It wouldn’t be an anime girl cosplay without some bunny ears, now would it? Rui spends 5 minutes in an early episode just wandering around the city in this outfit, listening to people’s conversations and feelings on GALAX. There’s something very funny about how nobody even notices them, like they’re completely invisible despite their ridiculous outfit. This actually factors back into the tech stuff! Like pretty much every tech company, Rui’s app and vision are both sleek and shiny but rely on tremendous amounts of dirty labor kept as hidden as possible. From Amazon’s inhumane warehouse conditions to Facebook’s trauma-inducing moderator farms to Apple’s child labor-tainted supply chains, there’s always suffering humans behind the too-good-to-be-true magic of tech companies. Rui’s lie by omission is failing to mention that the app relies on invisible extradimensional beings called CROWDS that are manually controlled by underpaid workers to assist its users. One of the workers comes to Rui challenging their vision and arguing that they should be sharing this tech with the movers and shakers of the world, not trying to keep it invisible. He threatens a collective walkout and Rui fires him. At this point, we’re not even operating on metaphors.

5. Green Business Casual

Sure, most tech companies have cruel labor underbellies, but there’s also the separate risk of moral rot. It’s what causes Microsoft to take on ICE contracts and Google to develop censored versions of their search engine at the whims of authoritarians. Many tech companies start off with an altruistic message, but without a serious ethical core, they will start doing a whole lot of evil as they bend to financial and other pressures. Rui’s version of this is extremely literal: she made a deal with the devil to gain the ability to use the CROWDS and launch her app. Except this devil is also a butch gender-noncomforming alien (there is a Lot of other gender going on in this show that I don’t even have time for) and the two of them seem to have an extremely fucked-up relationship. Like any good Faustian bargain or any bad attempt at raising more venture capital without a viable business model, eventually the whole thing comes tumbling down and now you’re doing something terribly fucked up. Rui looks good in a dress shirt, at least!

4. Whatever your abusive partner puts on when she body-snatches you

Of course the center won’t hold, GALAX is subject to a hostile takeover, and to nobody’s surprise, an app with the flimsy promise to change the world for the better can actually be way better at ripping it all apart. I guess the prescient social media parallel here is Facebook being used to propagate Myanmar’s ethnic cleansing, or really anything related to Twitter for the last 5 years. FuckedUpAlienMimic!Rui sure does have cute fangs and a way more refined fashion sense though. I don’t feel like looking into that one.

3. Business....Futch?

I know I’m not done outlining Rui’s arc, but I’m going to skip ahead for a moment to say that Gatchaman Crowds also has a second season! I’m largely ignoring it here because Rui is pretty much stripped of all plot relevance and most of her outfits are less exciting, but I had to include this one. For two episodes, she puts on bright yellow stirrup leggings and an oversized polo shirt, with a cute ponytail to boot. It’s a ridiculous look, but still feels really evocative to me. Sometimes a girl just has to put together completely uncoordinated outfits and see what happens.

Unlike the disruption-focused first season, Gatchaman Crowds season two, which aired in 2015, is about how unfettered technolibertarianism can easily descend into fascism. Goddammit.

2. The Bunny Ears Outfit Again Oh God Who Hurt Her

The weight of the world comes crashing down in Rui’s hands, she’s bruised and beaten in a surprisingly sadistic manner by her alien ex-business partner/girlfriend, and she’s locked out of her own company which is very quickly causing society to fall apart. So what does she do? She puts the bunny dress back on, and wanders the streets again until she has to call upon the powers that be to fix her own mess. It’s silly that the powers that be in this world are superheroes, but I bet you forgot that this was technically a superhero show at this point. Anyways, my extended metaphor is quickly drifting off course, but I guess this is the part where Rui gets grilled by Congress and slapped with an antitrust case.

1. Every Trans Girl Stereotype Rolled Into One

I’ve been incredibly harsh on Rui throughout this writeup, because I’m harsh on the industry she represents, but I’ll make it up with this section. Look at what she’s wearing! A choker, the gothiest Hot Topic dress imaginable, arm warmers, no less than three asymmetric garters not even holding up anything, and the tallest black boots she could find. It’s incredible! If the first outfit on this list was hinting at her relationship to stereotypical trans fashion, then this outfit just screams it. It’s the perfect goth femme hacker look, a style commitment I have no choice but to respect.

Gatchaman is a weird show. After spending most of its runtime thoroughly dunking on tech disruptors for being too optimistic and uncritical, it takes a last-minute turn into Lockean state of nature arguments. It settles on “the masses are inherently good enough that empowering people through technology shouldn’t ever be a problem”, ignoring all the suffering that happened due to Rui’s unwillingness to curate their own technology. I’d give Gatchaman Crowds an average rating, but it’s one of those interesting average ratings where instead of being milquetoast, they tried something and failed and wrote themselves into a corner. But hey, at least there’s an interestingly gendered character!

[lovemesomesurveys]

When was the last time you changed your opinion on somebody? I think it was recently with a social media influencer person or actor.

When did you last change your opinion on a situation?   Hmm. 

Why did you last visit the doctor?   I hadn’t been in to see him physically since February because of everything and they were able to do my prescription refills over the phone the past couple months, but they actually wanted me to come in this month. Thankfully, I won’t have to go back in person until August.

Do you like salt? Yeah. 

What was the last thing that made you feel proud and why? I’m proud of one of my cousin’s who’s graduating college next month. I just feel really bad because they obviously cant have a graduation ceremony. She was bummed about that. :(

Do you feel uncomfortable when people you hardly know confide in you? It can be because I don’t know how to respond. I have a hard time with that with people I do know. I suppose it depends on what they’re confiding in me about. I’d feel bad because it would seem they need someone to talk to and they felt comfortable enough opening up to me, but yeah it would be awkward.

Have you ever regretted what you said in drunken conversation once sober? Yes. 

Is there anything coming up which you’re dreading? We’re supposed to have triple digit weather here this week.... 

Anything you’re looking forward to? No.

Do you ever do tedious tasks just to keep your mind occupied? I have my usual things/distractions that I do everyday. 

Have you ever lived with somebody with truly repulsive habits? No, thankfully.

Do you tend to say things because they’re appropriate not because you mean them?   Actually, I do feel like I do this, mainly when I’m talking to people I don’t know very well. I think I taught myself a long time ago to censor myself in order to avoid embarrassing myself or coming off as weird or annoying or whatever, so I’ll say what I think is the most neutral/appealing. I’ve really been working on trying to be more authentic in everyday conversations. <<< I’m like that, too. I’ll just go along with things, too, to avoid conflict. 

What was the last thing to perplex you? It baffles me that people are flocking to the beaches and other places with large gatherings right now. I also really don’t understand why there’s such a big issue about wearing masks. Yes, they’re not the most pleasant thing to wear and it gets annoying, but c’mon. It’s really not asking too much and you’re protecting yourself and others by doing so. You can make a difference by wearing it, so just wear the mask. It certainly beats the alternative. 

What was the last thing to fascinate you? Hmm.

What was the last thing to annoy you? The comment section of the YouTubers I watch. People are just so annoying and rude. Some are really vile and cruel.

When did you last work your socks off fruitlessly? I haven’t done anything that required much work or time in a long time. 

When did your hard work last pay off?   I’d say getting my BA, but all the good that’s been. It’s just full of dust on a shelf now.

Do you have a favorite children’s book? Yeah, like the Little Golden Books, Little Critter, The Berenstain Bears, Ameilia Bedilia, and then when I got a little older I was into Goosebumps, Nancy Drew, The Babysitter’s Club, and Ramona and Beezus. 

If yes, what is it? ^^^    

When did you last feel a need to be alone? I always need some alone time. Some days more than others if I’m feeling especially down and moody.

When did you last “need” to be around people? I like spending time with my family as well. 

Have you ever been in a job where you didn’t fit in with your co-workers?   I’ve never had a job.

What do you do to “expand” your mind?   My days are very routine, so I do the same things everyday. I haven’t stepped out of it in awhile. I feel like I’m going through life on autopilot. I should get back into word games (I was obsessed with this one word game app on my phone for awhile that was fun) or practice a new language or something.

When did you last REALLY want to go out but couldn’t for whatever reason?   I’m really sad that I can’t go to the beach this summer. I know they’re starting to open back up, but I’m not ready for that. I don’t feel comfortable or safe doing so.

Do you need a wee right now?   No, I’m good. Thanks.

Is there a certain noise/sound which scares you? I’m such a jumpy person so any unexpected (sometimes even expected) noise will scare me.

When did you last eat sweeties? Are sweeties just sweets/desserts, or? If so, it’s been a couple weeks or so since I’ve had anything like that. 

Do you have a favorite micro-organism? No.

What was the last thing to upset you? Bleh.

What was the last thing to make you happy? My Disney trip earlier this year brought me a few days of happiness. 

Have you ever eaten chocolate for breakfast? Chocolate cereals like Cocoa Puffs or a chocolate chip granola bar.

Do you like balloons? There are pretty balloons, but they also just seem kind of pointless.

Out of the people you know, whose birthday is next?   One of my cousins has a birthday next month. 

Does that person have any plans to celebrate their birthday? I’m sure she’ll do something.

Do you enjoy swimming? No.

When will you next go to the beach? You really had to bring that up? I don’t knowwww D:

When at the beach do you like to swim in the sea?   No, I don’t go into the water. I just love being near it and watching/listening to the waves crash in, smelling the salty air, and feeling the cool ocean breeze.

If you have pet fish do you bother to name them?   I had a tank full of fish as a kid, but I don’t recall if I had names for them. 

Do you like adventure games like Monkey Island and Diskworld? I’m not familiar with those two games specifically, but yes I do like adventure games.

Did you ever read the Terry Pratchet “Disk World” books?   Nope. I’ve never even heard of them.

If yes to the question above, what are they like?

Have you had to change a nappy lately? Nooo.

Would you like a holiday about now?   I’d love a vacation, but that’s not happening for a long time.

What’s stopping you from going on holiday right now?   Oh ya, know... this bitch named Corona.

Do you keep your eggs in the fridge? Uh, yes? 

Have you ever owned chickens? No.

Do you like classical music? Some, yes.

When did you last listen to music?   Yesterday.

Have you ever seen “Canibal the Musical”? No.

Are your breasts sore? No. What a way to end a survey.

[hanzi83]

Probably the Longest Blog You Will Ever Read.. fuck it. Very Necessary Tho

Since I have not been constantly writing down my thoughts other than the occasional blog, that never seems to get any type of feedback, probably because no one is paying attention other than a few dedicated trolls, who I presume have been sent to fuck with my mental health, even if it is not true, the illusion of trying to implement some kind of devastating fear, and every time I decide to write a blog that expresses what is transpiring in my mind, it is met with no acknowledgement, and when it is acknowledged, it is the cult like trolls who will convert it to audio, so people will not bother to give me a click on where it is posted. I don’t know where this blog will particularly go since I never plan these out, and just write from the heart, and my will has not been into jotting down my thoughts, I still have point form notes on my phone dating back to last June about experiences and topics that have transpired, but for the most part it has mainly been me explaining how I think it is organized and wondering where it is all leading because it has meaning symbolically and how the seeds are planted, it has become clear since I stopped writing stuff down daily to get the frustration out of my system, that I have become exhausted mentally and can barely retain anything, whether it is reciting why capitalism is bad or if it means memorizing a movie or television show reference, mixed with how now to watch this entertainment that I have to read on the discourse about something not being woke enough, or if it something seems woke, then it just people pushing agendas, and then lesser known people expressing the fake wokeness that exists, and I just realize I am too stupid for this world so I just remain in the wrestling bubble, just like I began last decade.

I need to set this up because I am trying to think rationally as I write but I know in the middle of this blog, it will probably fall apart but it is a good thing that most people don’t take me serious, and I am not really on the masses radar, even though important people are constantly on the lookout for me, that is why my broadcasts on periscope are interrupted, my social media posts are practically shadow banned, my facebook lives are not giving out people notifications, so clearly they are trying to censor me, and it shows this is real censorship, not the marketing tool censorship where the masses are aware of the censorship at hand.

I have been writing blogs on a certain person on youtube, who has become completely unhinged, and then a group of people on the application periscope, that I feel have felt they did not get all of their use from me, so now are trying to align with people who have been waiting for anyone to have a mutual distaste, and what is weird is that I am this irrational and irrelevant mentally ill person they dismiss as just some delusional caller but these same people need to try to destroy any good that I try to create and try to bring me down so badly that I lash out with irrational anger that makes me want to go back to my ignorant ways after years of trying to deprogram myself since I was dumbed down majority of my life and fell for the ignorance, and because mental illness to the mainstream is just described as someone being sad, and not the fact that there are darker elements in mental illness people will not want to discuss, but rather they ignore it so when someone else is having a legit mental breakdown, they will pile on them all the while maintaining the “woke” points for addressing the stigma of mental illness, even if it means it is presented in such a limited way,

My trolls also realize that I have not been writing lately so they figure it will be easier for me to snap since they know I am not getting my thoughts out and the plan is for me to be piled on mentally so much, in such a pseudo intellectual way, that I will just snap and lose my mind and then the people paid to harass me can take the audio of me losing my mind and saying some hurtful shit to people encouraging a mentally ill person to go kill himself, and constantly hint that I will be targeted. It feels this aggressive trolling has begun on periscope when I was discussing these Howard Stern leaks, and it feels like we are at the precipice of Howard finally getting canceled because his past will come back to haunt him, so the person that will be of interest to people in the media might be me, and before that could happen these people need me out of the way. If my theories are correct, then these people could probably be sacrificed when they strike down on Howard’s image.

One of the other problems was that when I initially broadcasted on periscope, I would not really follow anyone and just broadcast while promoting it on twitter. Last summer, I got suspended on facebook and twitter and I decided to browse the app and see what kind of people are there. There were plethora of characters etc that existed and I have tried to become friendly with people, a lot of sex workers, musicians, gimmick personalities etc. It seems friendly but also if you browse by the random broadcasts you will see thumbnails of people I perceive to be young and I have to report because I feel people running periscope allow some type of exploitation on there that is truly disgusting,  but overall it has been kind of a positive experience, and I am so full of low self esteem I have to constantly name drop I was part of an institution to present myself to stand out but also interview different walks of life and get some good discussions going on, and also because I feel Howard has a stake in periscope, again it is my theory I name drop to see if people who are there are kind of answer to him since I feel the elite use these apps to sell people, but I could be wrong but if I am wrong at least I make a friend out of it. It feels like people also get sent to me, and since I don’t have the resources to do background checks on people, I always wonder if the system is sending people who are not good people to be associated with me, so it damages my reputation further. Even when I talk to people on there, I have to ask their age because if they are not over 18 I have to dismiss them from talking to them because I don’t like talking about the content I talk about in front of people who are not of age, even though I can control who comes into my broadcasts and don’t interact.

 So before I get accused of setting a narrative and speaking out like it is fact, I have to preface this by saying whatever I have written on here has been just my opinion, when I do my videos, I express my opinions and I might vent out of frustration because if I  don’t express myself I will probably end up harming myself and I don’t want to do that and since I do feel bad and get to reflect when I say some evil shit when being pushed by people, others just want to cross the line and then pretend they never did anything negative while pointing out all my flaws. So I don’t know where to go with this because I am not intelligent enough to deal with the nuances of good storytelling, or maybe I am just underselling it.

This lady came to my scope last summer after people who have been trying to troll me for years were in there and immediately I did not take her seriously because she was presenting herself as an alien and she would full of mystery all while having this soothing voice. I always have my guard up and I do want good content, as long as the people in my periscope are willing to come up and talk etc. I am creating content, and hopefully I can try to move on to a podcast, but there are a lot of people who somehow have some investment in me without knowing and if I don’t move on their watch, they will then start showing their true selves eventually. I entertained this lady’s presence for a while but then when someone from her past came onto my panel when they called into my periscope, that alien schtick went down the tube and I laughed because as a wrestling fan it would be like if the Undertaker was confronted by someone in real life and then him immediately dropping the Dead Man character and freaked out. I was not aware of the drama scopers on this app, because apparently a lot of doxing goes on and organized harassment, basically what I have predicted in my own life, but I am kind of watching it play out to others and it is just completely fucked up.

There was another nice man I met on scope who I gelled well with when discussing stuff and even though we did not agree, he clearly has some resources and his full of encouragement when people want to go for their dreams and if he is cool with you he will help you out but because I was suspect of this alien lady who would not ever address any of my questions for her, and I did not want to talk to her in private because apparently she belongs to some former patriot groups, and when I hear that I can only imagine these can’t be good. It is one thing to have a conversation with someone who might not be politically correct, but I have learned some people who lean right are not as bad and are anti imperialistic, while others are just defensive of anything criticizing Trump. I feel with these conversations I am able to at least talk to someone who I don’t agree with politically and get them to deprogram themselves from the ignorant propaganda, the same shit I used to kind of fall for. This woman does not seem like a Trump supporter but she is an enigma because she will play the Jewish card but still associate with people who have been fucking with me and bothering me to join their podcast network, and these people are insanely racist and bigoted. This lady puts it all on me when she comes into my scopes, and her supposed harassers come in, and because some of them seem like they could be dangerous, I try not to rock the boat with more enemies, but as far as I know they have been nice to me, but then again my trolls do the same thing where they endear themselves to people I try to make friends with and when I flip out they will claim I am the one bothering them. I just kind of wish she would have stayed out of my lives, I even blocked her because she was becoming a disturbance in my sessions, but the nice guy I became friends with would always kind of vouch for her and I did not understand why. The only thing I could come up with, is the typical “Are these 2 fucking?” because I don’t understand how you could just know someone for a month or so and suddenly just become these great friends, I did eventually unblock her and tolerated her but she would kind of want me to have conviction in protecting her when I don’t even know her like that because she has not presented any proof of this happening

The fucked up thing is she claims to be someone that just observes but she is following all the trolls who have been following me nonstop, and these people have become extra aggressive since making new friends on this app, like they are lashing out about me not paying attention to them and having people of color on my panel since I did not know that there were so many black and brown people on the app. They then start saying I am so anti white because I rail against a white supremacist system and then they discredit me with rumors of me beating up a gay couple, or beating my mother. They create accounts where they take pictures of me and blacken it because they think I want to be black. They are doing deep fakes of me talking, and then leaving suspicious messages instilling fear about me being kidnapped and killed. They have a sub reddit dedicated to me, and then when I become rational enough to analyze their mental illness, because if I am so irrelevant and useless and such a drain on society, then why wouldn’t you do something better with their lives? The answer is they can’t, because as useless as I have been, these people are even more useless for the last several years and clearly need to latch onto me to exist, and because people end up having problems with me they all connect because of their mutual hatred for me, but the truth is none of them are interesting without me and they lack creativity.

The alien chick and the supposed innocent dude would be in these scopes with these people witnessing my meltdowns on the Stern Show and apparently questioning them is a big no-no so I assume they get the advice of these trolls who study me that if they are nice enough and I don’t fall for it, it can be easily pushed against me that this is what happens and this is why I was kicked off the Howard Stern Show. They try to be like Howard and Robin and try to dismantle your psyche. I did not trust this lady and I felt like the dude I was cool with was just going to take her side regardless and because I feel like she is hanging out with my trolls, and I figured she was recruiting me for some kind of cult or wanted to capitalize of any value I have so they could get some clout, even though I barely have it on the surface. I am going all over the map and kind of leaving some details out but overall these people she claims were bothering her came into my scope, but according to this innocent nice dude, these are legit gripes, and I am supposed to have some kind of conviction, but not them because they are associating with people who have made my life hell, and they dismiss my claims even though there is a legit thread I have made on twitter on my pinned tweets where you can see the supposed threats made to me.

So the innocent dude eventually blocks me because I had the gall to get mad that I was not trusting him because he was in this dude’s scope who is harassing me, I got tired of periscope so I started doing facebook lives, and then the cult of trolls would fuck with that too by people not getting notifications and there would not be many there and I was so set out on doing it with low views for the principal, because I know when you are supposed to be popping, you will have a plethora of views, and when they punish you they dumb them down, but either way it is all organized. I eventually go back to periscope in December, and the alien lady has choice words for me because that innocent dude had “helped” me and he did but there was something they weren’t telling me, like there was some hidden investment with me, and it set their plans back by me leaving periscope for a bit. She would give me more attitude, and honestly I would have preferred to speak to the dude, instead of this chick who I feel has brainwashed this dude. That is the way I see it, they will probably read this and get mad that I am presenting it as fact, but a lot of the videos are on my facebook public page and there have been a lot of witnesses who can attest that I am presenting the events truthfully mixed with me presenting my theories, whether they are valid to you or not, depending on how low the totem pole I am in social media.  

(Blog continued 2 days after)

Now I have been out of practice from writing since I used to do it consistently in my life since 2007, and felt I had to make up for the anger I had years before, and I had a lot of deprogramming to do, it went from writing in notebooks and barely understanding what I was writing, or that I would have to write on my computer so I could read it back and maybe sustain some material for it so I could write a book of my irrational thoughts, but I scare myself with the anger I had and how my opinions would differ often and barely being able to retain shit, so sometimes I felt I would guess people were watching me and monitoring my computer so I would suspect different people and write things to test anyone and see what would prompt them to move my mouse so I know their presence is lurking digitally in some hacker like way.

Anyways, writing a blog has even drained me and I felt I was not aligning the stories well because I have been used to just talking more often on my platform than writing. I had to take a break from it and since the developments are breaking every single day I had to hold off and debate if I wanted to write a blog because it will seen as some act of social media war that will further encourage more harassment, that most people who have power and set the narratives can use to their advantage to further make me feel like a useless piece of shit, more so than already. If I vent, I am supposedly doing the woe is me gimmick, and constantly feeling sorry for myself, because I don’t want to hold in my irrational feelings or I will snap and maybe that is the wave right now.

So I did not bother to know where I left out because I am too lazy to read it so I will try to pick it up from where I left off and there is a good chance that I might repeat the same shit but at least if you are going to read this, I at least came up with an interesting angle of how to write a shitty blog that people will pretend does not exist, or maybe they just don’t know and I have to act like I am this important person being spied on.

I think it was from the time that I got blocked by this one guy from periscope, while he defends the alien lady. I know I should present names but if you been following it you already know the names, but I need to express this and I don’t want to be accused of putting their name out there and seeing as lying on their names, when I have explained ad nauseam that these are my theories, and no one ever listens to what I say and by people being scared people might believe me, it will contradict the whole thing of me being irrelevant and that maybe beneath the surface more people care about what I think.

I just feel when I took a break from periscope because I did not want to deal with more betrayal, at least from my perspective, do these trolls actually wish me harm or are they just testing me and toughening me up mentally and putting me through some shit, or these people are aligning with trolls who have tried to drive me insane by spreading rumors of me hitting my mother, or beating up a gay couple etc, and they put out misleading titles of what my periscope is about so when people do search my name, they will get these negative and untruthful shit at the top of google etc. That was my beef with these new people who wanted to be friends with me, but it seems like I am only supposed to take their safety seriously yet they will be following my trolls who have constantly pushed me to the brink of insanity and make me want to say some irrational shit that I will regret, because the system is so against me, if I irrationally talk shit and tell someone to do something horrible to themselves, they will suspend me. They push me to that so they can twist it into me being seen as threatening

I don’t know if the trolls have been aligned with these people from the beginning or do people approach anyone I make friends with and when I try to create some content with interesting discussion. The trolls hate me for not acknowledging them as much and because I have different people of different races/ethnicities/nationalities on and they spread this shit of me hating white people even though I talk about the systemic corruption and the grander white supremacy that exists on a pseudo intellectual type of way.

I took a month away from periscope, so my facebook lives would suffer when I would do decent numbers prior and suddenly I would be lucky if I would get 5 people in there but out of principle I would still do it and it would anger the trolls even more, because even though I was not broadcasting I was still being a guest on people’s periscope. They got it banned and I had to write a repeal on it and they gave it back. So it was like a test. I don’t know who helped do this but I eventually came back, and this time instead of dealing with the constant disturbance I would just block these trolls and not unblock them, because when I did, they would say I want the drama and want them to come in so when I become strict with it I then angered them even more and they will keep leaving cryptic messages on different troll accounts about them going to execute MK Ultra on me, or that they will kidnap me and that they are continuously watching me and monitoring me and showing so by knowing when I have therapy appointments etc.

It felt like this dude I met on periscope who really helped me for a bit, and this alien lady really wanted to teach me a lesson and maybe fuck with my head but overtly finding all the trolls, when there are people I roll with who have discussions with people who might seem more conservative, and I will have discussions and not budge from my point of view while still having the discussion, and some people I can get through but some have their minds made up on believing Trump is actually anti establishment and I can’t deal with it. So there was these 2 black dudes I have conversations with and enjoy their scopes, but they are constantly getting harassed by a lot of white people or people with Zionist leaning ideals and harass black people for not wanting to give them the time of day and think they are entitled to these people’s time. So when one of the guys lost account after account for defending himself, he had a enough and I shared his scope, because when he comes back with a new account I share it so more people can see it but the guy had a periscope saying “Jew Jokes’ not the best title, but he was trying to get at these Zionists fucking with him, and he even cleared it up that he is just doing that for that purpose, because he was pissed, the other guy, who loses account after account, wanted to troll with someone black in Nazi fatigue, and I expressed concern with it and he was just so pissed about being banned and I had to approach him privately and explain that even though I know what he is doing it is wrong to do it because it feels like you are cosigning some white supremacist shit, and it that people try to discredit black people a lot, that it gives the Zionist more ammo because ultimately it won’t matter if they did racist shit first, it will be all put on the black dudes. So this alien lady, who often tells me that the people harassing her are anti Semites, and I don’t hang around them enough to know, they only come in when the alien lady comes on my scope, and I am expected to just block them, when she won’t even unfollow  the trolls harassing me. She starts this campaign that I am hanging out with anti Semites and she seems to dismiss what others are going through, while she is hanging out with anti Muslim type of people who also say anti Semitic shit and actual real generalizations. That is why I hate generalizations and specify Zionism, even though they are starting to say that Zionism and Jewish is the same. The guy I talked to privately was thankful for my advice, because he was so irrationally angry he wanted to do something to upset them, because he is constantly being called the N word and having money taken off his table by getting his broadcasts suspended and making people rebuild.

So this is when I was like I had enough of this shit because it hurt me to know this dude I met on periscope who became friends with will defend this chick for some reason. Why does she get to follow all these people who are often anti Black and anti Muslim? I don’t even know where this is going but if these people are aligning with my trolls, and they are actually trying to do harm to me, because they want me on their playing field where all my trolls are, and think I am using them for entertainment on my platform, which is what the app is for, but when something organic is to be discussed I don’t mind that, but they wanted me in their platform because it supposedly was not for entertainment while all these people in there are guilty of putting fear and severe paranoia in me.

The trolls will constantly try to pretend they turned a new leaf and that they are done harassing me but will still have sub reddits trying to dox me, or mislead with the titles to paint me in a bad light, and the stuff they claim I am saying that is fucked up when I am angry is what made them fans of me on the Stern Show, while probably being associated with people like that dude Jimmernam, who has probably been behind the attacks as well.

Jimmernam has become much more unhinged and he has started to fucking with the True Crime community because everything else has fallen apart and since he pissed off his old crew so much and has done so much fucking damage in people’s lives, wherever he goes to endear himself and then destroy it because that is what he does, he has done it to some poor woman named Limonade. I was done after the summer where I wrote the blog and believing that there are lies about him being a child groomer, and how he has changed from the old guy, but he has that venom in him and he is still full of lies. He hates me for not cosigning his show the first time and not believing his sob story and how he tried to use Wendy to gain sympathy, and then people expected that she was taking her donations to give to him, and he would play dumb about giving it back and change the topic. He even caused a beef with me and that Ross Dawg guy, because he knew I was protective of Wendy so he would get her to say different people are bothering her so I would be insanely angry about it, and it almost started something ugly because even though I don’t like the general way Stern has trained the public to talk to Wendy, I have to understand she is used to that and she gravitates towards that kind of thing and I don’t want to feel she can’t have fun and joke like normal with people etc. So when he fucked with this Limonade chick, I really felt for it and it was like a united front with people who I did not see eye to eye with, to help this woman against Jimmer, who turned her friends against her, constantly doxing her, and her family, and putting out threats within 12 hour streams, all while taking over her community of True Crime and wanting to be the number one guy in town. And the sycophants have become a lot worse, I don’t know how he has convinced these many people to help him and be completely blinded by his tactics, and the ones who are standing up for themselves as doing dirty tactics, when it is not nearly on the same level, and it is being done out of self defense. I don’t agree with everything people say on the panel, but I have enjoyed discussion I have had with certain people because without being this preachy SJW, I try to teach people that the shock jock type of humor is not really the edgiest and it doesn’t mean it can’t be funny but I would rather have people agree with me with systemic shit, and let them do their shock jock style of humor, but Jimmernam’s crew will take stuff and make videos to discredit any type of criticism towards him and create false narratives about him. It feels like what he pretends he is going through, he actually does it to me, so it sounds like me and him are kind of the same, but this guy copies everything, Howard Stern’s personality, Bill Burr generic whit woman voice,  NBA commentators closing tags and even channels Chris Jericho by calling himself Le Champion. When he sees that this woman has backup, he will try to get in on the Stream Yard link and claim he wants to talk when he just wants to insult her and project things on to her and questioning her parenting and her divorce, when he is the guy who can’t see his kids because of the shit he is doing. He will send his teenage audience into this woman’s streams and then make videos of how she is grooming him, when he is the one who has had a kid audience and played adult content for them and constantly bringing up how people are calling him a pedophile because he let a kid in his discord in 2018 and it had porn in it, and he will claim the videos of him are being edited, when it is not and that is him. He lost his mind when he lost that reddit money, so now he has just become a lot bitterer and he is threatening me and others.

He did not like that I was on her panel and making new alliances and friendships, especially with people I didn’t think I liked before because I assumed they were just doing ignorant shock jock humor when they are a lot more deeper about their discussions. Now Jimmer did not like that and it gave me confidence to stand up to him seeing how this Limonade chick was standing up to him, even though she has been getting a lot of shit on her from her former friends, one of which is a gay guy who seems so scared he just hangs out with Jimmer, and Jimmer has constantly been kind of homophobic and does not regret any of the hurtful things he has said to people, It feels like that Kitty chick, who he doxxed when she did not have his back, is back with him time to time, even though she is good at hiding her role in doing any dirt,  so as far as I know she has nothing to do with this, but it feels like if they want to make money in a field and continuously create drama, they will. I could be wrong though. It felt for a while that he was going to get caught for what he is doing, but he just comes back more confident and making some threats and dedicating streams to putting out private information, and it seems youtube does not want to do anything. He does not like that I aligned with this woman to give her support about what he has been doing, and I did it because maybe if people in that community did not believe the others who are informing these people about the past of this guy and to watch out for him, I would have more credibility since I am a former celebrity essentially and since we in society value someone who seems to have greater value unfortunately because of how “famous’ they are, I thought I would put it for good use, and now Jimmernam aka Misery Box has threatened to come after me, which is aligning with the original trolls who are now constantly bothering me and sending people to my scopes, and maybe get shady people to befriend me so I will be associated with someone I don’t know well. I don’t have the resources to do background checks, I kind of assume if this person is just roaming around I want to believe they are not all scumbags, even if they put on a false bravado of being anti PC, they are buying into ignorance,

So this all ties into the alien lady because she followed me when one of the guys who has power with the app came into my scope, and since I blocked her he and the trolls have become a lot more aggressive, but I also know that these people are associated with Jimmernam, and these people seem hella racist, and bigoted, and this alien lady keeps making it seem like I am the one rolling with racists, while she is claiming to be someone with special powers who can put people into rehabilitation, so maybe she is someone special and I don’t realize it. I am having a hard time understanding what is going on because there is another guy involved who she calls my producer, who started out as a troll, but he and I have gotten a long, but sometimes I wonder since he had a friendship with her and that other dude I met on scope, he has kind of seem iffy by wanting me in their clique and to believe them, but when I don’t give in, he will be on my side, but then the lady will tell me he is the one that is stirring all of this up.

I realize by not giving specific names, I may be confusing people, but keep in mind that no one gives a fuck about these stupid blogs but I did an outlet to write about it and the more I write, I just fucking shake my head how I am so bad at explaining all of this and what makes it worse is that you can’t keep up with people who I am referring to other than a few people. The trolls will be so much more outward aggressively with admitting they want me to kill myself and encourage me to take pills, and what hurts about this, what if I am not the only one these people do it to, and how many people who have killed themselves have dealt with targeted harassment. So while I am tougher mentally than a lot of others, I can take it, even though it hurts my fucking soul, because these people can be protected and say the worst shit and do the worst shit and me standing up for myself is what is magnified because I am supposed to be the better person, even though people want to pile on me and making me a miserable person.

When I separated with the dude and the lady, I figured they would get mad at the fact I am moving forward so they have to try and show up in different scopes I am in and maybe tell people to come and be spies for them. So sometimes when I am hurt about how my friendship with this dude was from the summer, I might be irrational and talk shit and I do this knowing he will hear about it, and he will act like I am talking shit about him, and he will say he does not want part of drama, but he is still monitoring me, and because I am not giving in, this is all I suspect in a theory not fact, that they need to start with me but look like the rationalized ones. I was willing to make peace but because they dismiss what I am going through and claim that I am endangering this lady because she insists on observing my scopes, but hates that her followers are there, like it is my problem, I don’t encourage hatred toward her and continued harassment. I might talk shit about her when she makes my broadcast about her, but she will claim she finds it funny or whatever, but when it is convenient she will then use it as a prime example of why I am an asshole.

Last weekend we had a blow up where I was on her scope with the trolls, who are aligned with Jimmernam, and the dude I was friends with who does good community work, who seems to have conviction, because he did end his friendship with people who treated Wendy like shit, which is admirable but all I did was bring up is that he is careful of his image but he is hanging out and following trolls who might be aligned with someone who might be grooming children, I did not say that he is the one who is a child predator or anything but I can understand why he is mad, but I am making a point that I am getting hated on for people I don’t want to fuck with and get doxxed by, because I let them in my periscope but not following them while he and this alien lady are following someone like this account Gorilla Bacon, who will restream my shit and play my worst calls. Sometimes I don’t know if these people are actual fans and they are just toughening me up or if these people are punishing me and becoming more aggressive because it is their job to get me out of the way before Howard ends up getting canceled when his past and his potential corruption might be brought to light.

These trolls don’t realize that the only reason people are aligning with them is because they all have mutual hatred for me. It could be anyone, it could be this dude on periscope, the alien lady, the trolls, Jimmernam and his kid army, or maybe people in my life who probably hate me. Either way their lives are all better than me and yet they need to make me feel like shit and rub it in my face I am on welfare, like this was not the plan from the system, because there are different rules in this world, and they blacklist me from making a living anywhere else so they can say I am not trying to monetize anything because I am not doing it on their time.

Any chance for anything embarrassing they will run with. Here is an example, if I say something that might be about agendas by the upper echelon of the LGBTQ, they will say homophobia but then if I say that I would consider having sex with a post op Trans woman, then they will mock me for it like they are homophobic. They will say the most racist shit against Muslim women or black people, and then a story comes out from someone as a joke about how I asked a Muslim woman out because we both live in Toronto, and she is a cool chick who has a good sense of humor, she asks me how much I will pay for her and where I will take her and I am willing to pay for something small on  first date because it is about getting to know each other but I believe if we should pay our own shit on the first date, but she jokingly said I need to spend more money and I said “I will spend 50 bucks at most” and when I was given the option of over 100, I said “For that kind of money I better be getting laid” but I did not mean it literally because it was my way of conveying that it is ridiculous to expect a man to pay so much on a first date to get to know each other,  just like it is ridiculous for me to expect sex on the first night. But the trolls ran with it and said that I am harassing a woman so it becomes a top google search when you look me up. It feels they are amplifying it because if Stern does get exposed, and I am someone who has been a prime target for calling him out, then when the general public looks me up, they will see these false narratives about me, and that is why it hurts to see these people who I thought were good, to align with these trolls who are doing it, and because they are not getting the shit they wanted out of me, they will have no issues to act like I am this dangerous human being who is lying and causing all this pain, and that won’t work. You will not point out at me and discredit me, because I am such an easy target who has no backup.

No media outlet even gives a fuck and it is sickens me because it will continue and it feels like they will only care until something horrible happens to me so then they can pretend they give a fuck about the situation, kind of like they are what they claim the MSM is and maybe someone is investigating and I am wrong but it feels like the worst possible shit has to happen in order for it to be exposed. You know how fucked up that is? It is like no matter what people have to profit off the pain and it shows that all these things are predetermined and will have solutions after the fact. It does not matter and I wrote this in 2 parts and made it this long because I hope if you are reading this, I hope you got a headache from reading all this convoluted mess of an explanation. I know most of you will not get through it all so you might as well put it on vocaroo to so you can get through it easier. Make sure you set it on some stereotypical accent.

I wrote this part with the fact that lately it has been more peaceful but when I was given the choice of not wanting this lady in my scope or wanting her out of my life, they did not take it kindly because if I gave in then I wanted her in my life, but by saying no because she has fucked with me too much and changed the narrative on me to paint me as the bad guy because she couldn’t make me fall for her spell, like she seems to have on other people, she is now coming into scopes of other people I have met and is kind of trying to poach them from partaking in my lives, and now she is coming back to my scope and pretends she is just automatically being put there and that the whole ambush on me on her scope was just comedy, Now that I let her back on, she will twist that, and say I forced her to be put on.

I don’t know what the fuck is going on anymore. I will close with this, that if you are someone of importance and power, you need to check in on this Misery Box guy and what kind of fucked up shit he has convinced his people to do. He has ensured that I will not go on that Limonade chick’s panel because he has threatened me and encouraged me to kill myself, and tell me how my parents don’t love me because I am such a disappointment, even threats of doxing them when people are not well, and I have tried to document this, if you go to my twitter page and look at the pinned tweet where I show old audio of Howard in 97 jokingly threatening the media if they fucked with him he would have dossiers on them to ruin their lives, and in that thread I have documented some of the cryptic videos, and threats of something happening to me, and it just does not matter anymore. I don’t know if the alien lady has anything to do with him but she is allowing some of the people she is associated with.

By the way on a scope where this bigoted guy who I hate was threatening to kill myself because his periscope girl friend cheated on him. Even though I hate the guy for how fucked up he is and feels no remorse I don’t like seeing anyone lose their mind, but he was one of the guys who I used as an example of the alien lady being friends with, who constantly says racist shit when she would point out because I shared the scope of the black atheist dude who was being harassed by Zionists, and now being labeled an anti Semite. So I called into the guy’s scope to see if he was for real and if he was fine, and if this situation was so real, that alien lady chose the time where he was threatening to kill himself and people, to come and tell me it was my fault and that I don’t care. She has no problem with just blaming me flat out and just making up lies, and then act like she is a victim afterwards if I point out her bullshit. It has become such a fucking mess. I don’t even know what this blog will accomplish. I am trying to move forward and it feels these trolls will not allow me, and they have me in a constant state of fear and paranoia, and when I explain myself they will even make more of a mockery because of it. It is so fucking gross and sick.

[loveactivist]

Tumblr. Staff. Policies.

Alright, everyone has heard so far about tumblrs new policy about allowing no adult content. Even though I run this simply writing blog where my page will not be affected that doesn’t mean I’m not gonna say that I think the tumblr staff is full of assholes and I shouldn’t stand up and sign petitions against the ban and in support of pages dealing with nsfw. (Please sign the petitions against Tumblrs new policy)

Tumblr has always been known for being the type of platform where you can scroll through your feed and find explicit shit come on, whether you wanted it to or not, and you just quickly scroll past it like nothing happened. But let’s be honest, that happens on every social media platform, just maybe not a full on porno coming on your feed. There’s an argument about how parents shouldn’t have to deal and worry about their young child being on a platform and having to deal with that, yet we’re in age where you could monitor your child’s social media and phone time for their safety. And second of all, it’s important to already teach your kids about internet safety before they even get onto any media platforms. We’re all very self aware of the problems that we face online, but tumblr has always been the site to be considered more “Rated R” than any other site. And I don’t think I’ve ever considered Tumblr has a “child friendly” site to begin with, but it can be since installing the “safe mode” option.

The main problems with tumblr is how it’s been like living in a porn bot apocalypse. And tumblr hasn’t cleaned it up at all. Some of my most popular writing pieces get reblogged by these porn bots, but they erase all my content and keep my likes and reblogs. That’s one of my most annoying issues, because even though they aren’t stealing my work, they’re stealing my credit. Yet besides that, you get random bots messaging you and coming up into your feed and getting rid of that problem, would’ve been for the greater good for everyone.

You know, I genuinely don’t have a problem with adults running porn related blogs whether it’s just reblogging or posting their own explicit content. Some people do it for their own pleasure, and some people actually do it on here to help their line of work. There is nothing wrong with working in rated r content, it’s obviously not the most traditional thing to do, but there’s nothing wrong with it as long as people are being safe about it. Isn’t that what’s really important? Doing things with safety and protecting yourself from danger. Yet, there are still people that use social media to solicitate minors and tumblr isn’t a site that is an exception to that. There are several blogs on this site that demonstrate pedophilia and concerning behavior, that needs to be looked out and watched for. And as terrible as this is, whether you’ve encountered it or not, but child pornography is a definite and disgusting reality here that is still needed to be taken care of. I’ve read a comment from an old man saying how young girls are the best types because they don’t fight back, and I’ve been across a blog concerning their own incest relations. Illegal activity and putting other users in dangers is the real problem, not if people decide to post pornstars or sell their own brand of lingerie.

You can watch porn anywhere on the internet, but you can’t find every nsfw artists on some porn site or even any social media platform without having to censor their own work, so they don’t get reported. And there are people that create nsfw merchandise, and there are few sites they can promote it on and Tumblr was one of them.

The funny thing is that the other half of Tumblr is made up of nsfw, and there’s honestly nothing wrong with that or to be ashamed of, because sex and sexual appeal is a big influence in the society we live in (which can’t be helped). There were other issues that Tumblr needed to resolve first. With the intentions of trying to fix a problem, they created a bigger one. They’re robbing several fantastic artists of exposure, because they like to draw porn, or because they’ve drawn a character with clevage or a woman showing her nipples, as if no one on Earth has them. Tumblr is just quickly going downhill by flagging everything, even content of people hugging and holding hands. Tumblr is like any other site where you share what you like on, but there’s several people here that decided to make a living on what they like to do and tumblr is a part of promoting themselves. Tumblr shouldn’t deprive people and the other side of their fan base from nsfw content, because they decided to want to be considered more “safe” when this site has never been looked at as a “child friendly” place, and wanting to make it more comfortable for others - give me a break, people use tags for a reason. And the only nsfw content that shows up under tags that aren’t related to that are because of porn bots. And just because Tumblr got taken off the App Store, I figured this place would love to rebel more instead of doing this since they claim to be “wide open” with “creative expression.” The reality of their decision is Tumblr isn’t supportive of those that use nsfw as creative expression, who were never going against any guidelines before, because of the pressure and the offense they felt for being taken off the App Store.

So, Tumblr you either get your fucking shit together and re-evaluate your decision, because what you did was extremely inconsiderate. And I’m not even running a blog considered “adult content.”

You were cool and all, but fuck you for doing this. @staff

[tessatechaitea]

The Extremist #3

I'm disappointed that this half picture doesn't match up exactly with the half picture from Issue #2.

It's probably good I didn't post any of the blurbs that tried to bribe him with a handjob in the backroom of the Portland Comic-con.

Anyway, let's see what happened in "July, Nineteen Ninety-Three"! I'll try to baby it up so Tumblr doesn't shit its diapers.

Peter Milligan begins this issue all Peter Milligany.

Remember that this was written in 1993 when Peter Milligan makes mention of how a person could, at some point, be alone in anything. But also imagine now how the death of an intimate would go in 2019. Back in 1993, Judy is surprised to find that she's whisked away from her grief for long interludes by the bureaucratic machinations of a death in a capitalist democracy. This same kind of thing probably still happens except with more texts and emails and less phone conversations and driving to speak to people in person. But also imagine the non-bureaucratic side of death. We probably have far less close intimate contacts in our physical space now than we had in 1993, at least by percentage when compared with all people we would consider contacts (intimates who now live in another part of the world, people we know only from online, friends of friends we've maybe met once but now sometimes interact with over social media). In 1993. it would be phone calls and personal visits with flowers and cake or cookies. In 2019, you probably receive a deluge of crying emojis and people replying "*hugs*" to your post about your world crumbling beneath you as you try to stagger on with your remaining years bereft of the person you thought you could never live without. I suppose there are plenty of apps where people could send you cakes and cookies so I suppose it wouldn't be too terrible. Should I create an app that sends cakes and cookies to people when they've lost a loved one? It wouldn't cost anything. You'd just have to send me a small cake and some cookies with every use of the app! I can't wait to get extraordinarily fat! The journey is going to be so worth it!

Grief is a savory, selfish feast.

Peter Milligan has a way of expressing potent, terrible truths in such a casual manner that most people probably don't even notice them. There's an almost expressible power in believing you're experiencing something that nobody else has or will ever experience. Or just in knowing that you lived a part of your life unknown to your closest friends and family. I cherish, greedily, the moments of my life spent alone and far from those closest to me and I parcel them out as stories in only the most meager of manners. Hell, I've probably told more about myself and my experiences here on this blog exactly because I know my friends and family don't read it. I might say this every commentary until this series is over but I still don't know if I understand the point of the overall plot. But I do understand that the plot is a way for Peter Milligan to be Peter Milligan. I understand the need for a framework to say things you want to say. Or to just put scenes out there that you don't want to bother encasing in some kind of larger whole that you're less interested in. So here's another scene Peter Milligan had to have thought about and then needed a place to mention it:

Of course people still get horny for their dead partner! But how often does anybody talk about it?! Maybe it's common and I'm just consuming the wrong kinds of media. Alex Trebek never once asked a contestant if they jerk off thinking about their dead spouse!

Netflix's Dead to Me has some pretty frank discussions about the loss of a spouse but while Christina Applegate talks about being horny and wanting to fuck somebody, I don't think she ever says she masturbates thinking about her dead husband. If the point of this story is about dealing with loss, I'm beginning to get it. And that would completely explain why I missed it at twenty-one. I'm only three pages into this issue and it's kicking me in the face with existential issues. Was I too dumb at twenty-one to understand any of this or just too sheltered to really feel it? Maybe I was just too fucking young. Judy finds the key to Jack's Extremist apartment. After looking around the place, she thinks, "It was like having Jack die all over again, but this death seemed more profound. 'I never knew you,' I thought." It's an easy statement to point out that nobody ever really knows anybody. But once, because Jim Starling wrote a terrible run on Stormwatch, I wrote an entire rant about how we all hide our innermost dark secrets from even the greatest loves of our lives. I was essentially asking how can we know anyone if we won't even let those closest to us know our most vulnerable thoughts and terrible crimes (I don't mean crimes in the law and order sense! I just mean like that time you put your finger in your ass and then made sandwiches for your friends and they all got sick and you didn't do it on purpose but you made the connection and nobody must ever fucking know! You know, those kinds of crimes. But not that specific one! I totally just made that one up for effect). So I could repeat myself or just link to the rant or just (and — Spoiler! — this is the choice I'm going with!) move on to page five of this comic book. Judy discovers an old diary written by The Extremist (but not Jack!). Then she finds some of the tapes he burned and salvages a few. She hears Jack speaking about murder and getting pissed on and, most appallingly, calling her "poor dull dead little Judy." She smashes the place up, finds The Extremist's gimp suit, and tries it on thinking, "What the fuck?! Maybe I'll feel sexy and start speaking in sex metaphors!" Then the phone rings. And I suppose the rest is history! And by history, I mean Issue #1! Except I'm only on page seven so maybe I'm jumping the gun. I guess we need to learn how Judy met Patrick and why she decided her life would be better by going out at night murdering people until she comes hard in a leather suit. Oh, I hope that last sentence wasn't too adult for Tumblr! A bunch of pages are taken up by the plot stuff that I apparently paid the most attention to in 1993 and which is the least interesting part of the story (so far!). Patrick "accidentally" runs into Judy and he pretends he doesn't know who killed Jack. He offers to help her find out if she'll pose as The Extremist and do murders and blow jobs for him. Judy is all, "What the hell! Maybe I'll understand Jack a little more! Maybe I'll know why he needed a boring piece of shit like me when he was having such fantastic fuck and murder adventures!" No wait. That's what I would say. Judy just wants to find out who killed Jack and to, maybe, feel a little closer to him. I don't think she's as amped up as I would be about the loads of indiscriminate sex and murdering of the most perverse perverts. The main story ends with Judy making her first kill. She learns that her problem was that she was always living in the past and the future. So even if she had wanted to kill somebody in the moment before, she'd be all tangled up in the past and whether the person deserved it and maybe some of it was her fault and perhaps she's been too hasty with her murder decision. And she'd also be lost in the future like how the person will stop existing and how she might wind up in prison and how the victim's guts are going to be hell to clean up off the floor. But in the moment, she can just satisfy the need without consequence or conscience! She discovers it's a thrill! Well, I could have told her that! I've been playing Dungeons and Dragons since I was ten! Never worry about what the orc did or if it deserved it or if it has family or if you're actually the asshole raiding its lovely home! The actual issue ends with Tony, the black guy on the stoop, sitting in The Extremist's apartment listening to Judy's tapes. He's just finished the last one where she says she's going off to kill Patrick and he's completely caught up in the drama. He wants to know who killed who just as badly as, well, not me but I'm sure some readers were on the edge of their seat at this point. The Extremist #3 Rating: B. I don't find myself caring about the framework. But Peter Milligan has thoughts and those thoughts are well worth the admission price to this story. In a way, this is just an extension of his run on Shade the Changing Man. It's almost the same story if you squint your eyes and unfocus your vision and punch yourself in the genitals. Patrick is the guy on Meta who was pulling the strings to get Shade to go into the Area of Madness and eventually Earth (I forget his name! I bet it was Patrick!) And The Extremist is Shade and Kathy too (they both have similarities to both Judy and Jack, so I don't mean to say either Shade or Kathy is essentially one or the other). The Extremist has crazy missions where they kill and fuck just like Shade and Kathy had! I think. I mean, probably! And Tony is just Lenny in someway that I haven't spent any time thinking about but they were the only characters left!

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Facebook, Instagram, and WhatsApp Outage Is a Friendly Reminder of the Internet’s Fragility by Ileana Villalobos

On Thursday March 15, 2019, Instagram, WhatsApp, and Facebook experienced a technical error that lasted almost a full 24 hours, the longest running outage they have ever experienced. It was so disruptive that Facebook turned to its mortal web-enemy Twitter to explain to users that the site was down, and to keep them updated on the fixes. When users would try to log into one of these three sites, they would see messages such as: “Sorry, Something went wrong. We're working on getting this fixed as fast as we can.” Instagram users could not view other people’s profiles, WhatsApp users could not send other people messages, and Facebook users news feeds were blank and Messenger app were non-functional.

The outages began Wednesday, March 13th in the afternoon and appeared to affect places all around the world, including (but not limited to): the United States, Central and South America, and Europe. Users in Asia were having problems beginning Thursday morning. Despite some early internet rumors that the outages were the result of a distributed denial-of-service (DDos) attack (which is a type of hack where attackers flood a company's network), Facebook stated that "the issue was not related to a DDoS attack." They blamed the outage on a change they had made to its system that resulted in a continuously repeating loop of problems that kept growing and could not be fixed immediately. On Thursday afternoon, a Facebook spokesperson said, "Yesterday, we made a server configuration change that triggered a cascading series of issues. As a result, many people had difficulty accessing our apps and services."

Despite the Facebook team effectively resolving the issue by this morning, Facebook stock still fell 3% in merely hours. It was an eye-opening reminder to both investors and to the population at large that even the most powerful internet companies, with some of the best computer scientists and innovative technology in the world, can still experience a global scale crash simply by an accidental human error made by a single person. The more closely woven a computer or internet application network becomes, the more likely it is that a small technical problem can grow into a much larger one due to their interconnectedness. This is especially so in the case of Facebook, Instagram, Messenger and WhatsApp, which bring in billions of visitors in volume every single day.

Thursday’s outburst only strengthens one of the most controversial arguments made by Massachusetts Senator and Democratic presidential candidate: Elizabeth Warren. She wants to break up big tech and other huge conglomerates if she is to be elected president. Warren’s proposal to break these tech giants up would include Facebook divesting its major acquisitions, WhatsApp and Instagram. According to Warren, "Today's big tech companies have too much power -- too much power over our economy, our society, and our democracy. They've bulldozed competition, used our private information for profit, and tilted the playing field against everyone else. And in the process, they have hurt small businesses and stifled innovation." Amusingly enough, just the day before the outage, Facebook recently proved Sen. Warren’s platform promise all the more necessary when ads she put up on Friday condemning tech giants (including the social media network itself) were taken down. Warren was not happy, tweeting out: “Curious why I think FB has too much power? Let's start with their ability to shut down a debate over whether FB has too much power. Thanks for restoring my posts. But I want a social media marketplace that isn't dominated by a single censor. #BreakUpBigTech.” While Facebook has since changed their mind and re-instated the ads, this incident serves as a sobering reminder of the amount of control they have over what information the public has the ability has to see, especially any criticism of their business.

In many ways she’s right. But in the complete opposite way, one of the most negatively affected groups of users on Facebook are those that rely on its services, such as advertising companies. Because of how impactful Facebook and Instagram are on these users, they are still very powerful digital marketing tools that they need to expose their content to. Other businesses that handle transactions and create marketing content also suffered for almost an entire day.

It is unclear if something like this will happen again, but the backlash Facebook has received will certainly motivate them to be more careful with the handling of their applications. The internet does not treat errors such as these well. Please enjoy the following Facebook Outage memes made in response of the outave for comedic relief: