#forcing myself to post progress stuff <3< /div> Explore tagged Tumblr posts

[directdogman]

hey dog! sorry to bug you with a coding question, but i'm learning rpg maker mv for a fangame & i'm wondering how you did a couple things. if it's not too much trouble, could you quickly explain some of it? i've scrounged around as much as i can but i cant find what i need so i thought it'd be worth asking directly ^^;

how did you get the players name to show up in the message log? i know theres a plugin that adds the name windows for other characters & i've got that figured out, but i have no idea how to get the players name to show up in the history after selecting stuff

how'd you get the graphic for the route diverging choices to show & play During choices? so far ive figured out that looping the images recreates the visual but then the game doesn't progress, bc its just stuck in that loop...

how'd you disable ( + grey out) dialogue options after selecting them??

how'd you add the fullscreen option? i found a code that was supposed to add a fullscreen option to the optionscore settings but that one just breaks the plugin & i simply Don't know enough javascript to figure it out myself

i'm using all the same plugins that dialtown has so clearly these are possible without extra ones, i just don't know how to do it,, thanks for explaining your pronoun system a little while ago btw! i wasn't the one who asked but your post was super helpful when i was setting it up for myself :D

It's been close to 6 years since I started making DT, and I had to figure out a few solutions to specific issues that cropped up which I've likely forgotten now, but I'll answer what I can remember. I'm also gonna give you some advice and advise you not to use RPG Maker for projects like these.

I basically Scott Cawthon'd DT and forced the engine to yield to my demands because I wanted to use the one I knew best. A few of these solutions are over-complicated because the easier ones (which would've worked in other engines) had to be constructed differently. I'll also mention a few solutions to problems you might not have encountered (but inevitably will if you try to recreate DT.) With that out of the way...

1)

You'll want these settings for the backlog plugin. the \c[x] commands refer to standard name colours. Log special inputs set to true, followed up by this below:

\n<\c[4]\n[1]\c[0]>%1

With \n[1] being the name you want and the number after the first c being what colour you want.

I'll also save you a potential future issue: I'd actually recommend you find the backlog plugin I used in DT's files (located inside the www/js/plugins folder) and use the version I have instead of the official release if you're not already, because I made a small change to fix an error. Basically, it breaks slightly with the plugin that lets you bring up the menu during dialogue because text reloads when you leave the menu and re-enter the text box, causing text to be logged at least twice after you pause it. If you keep bringing up the menu, you'll get constant duplication. I simply added a line of code that tells the log not to have two duplicates in a row. Not a programmer, but it seems works.

2)I did it in a funny way to ensure the engine wouldn't screw it up. Basically, there's 3 steps to the event and it's kinda hard to explain (and would be annoying to reproduce without a lot of trial and error for a beginner.) It's easier if I show my code. The first thing I do is run a common event (you can also just paste this code in and run it from the event) that renders the frames used by the popup, so they're loaded into memory + ready to go.

As you can see, they're set to 0 opacity but now ready to be used. Obviously they have to be on a layer that isn't being used by anything else in the scene (and won't be during this part of the game.) I run this event ahead of time, usually 4 messages before the choice comes up or so, so even slower PCs should have time to get them up.

The 'if head' thing just switches between the files for phone/typegingi's heads. I render each frame on separate layers and toggle their opacity from one to the next on a single frame to avoid flickering (bc RPG maker's renderer is hot trash and I have to work around it. Case in point.)

Step 2 is a second command event that orders the frames to fade in.

One layer is the text (which doesn't move) and the other is the first frame of the little head animation. A switch is also turned on at the end, and this signals the animation to go, which is handled by an event on any map where a choice like this comes up.

The event page that handles the animation itself has 2 pages, one to handle the animation as it goes and the other to handle when it stops (note that you could use one page and simply use a conditional branch. I didn't.)

Set to parallel so it runs in the bg behind normal events. As you can see, every 17 frames, I command one image to fade out over a single frame and another to fade in. It loops perfectly, cycling from middle frame, to left, to middle, to right, back to middle. Finally, when you select any route diverging choice, it sets off a second switch, which activates the second event page and commands the game to dispose of the graphics and then turn itself off.

Basically, it's the same animation but with a twist. The text is faded out over 60 frames and then the same animation is played as before, except the values it fades back into go from 255, to 170 to 85. Each of those commands is also followed by a 17 second fade to the opacity of the next frame. So, frame one renders in one frame at 255. Then seventeen frame fadeout to 170... Next frame renders for 1 frame AT 170, then fades out gradually to 85. Then next frame renders at 85 during 1 frame, fades to 0. This is how i synced the turning animation to fade out convincingly.

At the very end, I turn both of the switches this event page uses off so both event pages don't continue on loop. I also have a check for the first event variable to check if the game should still think the animation is running, as a failsafe. I don't remember if this mattered.

3)It's a function in the YEP Extended Message Pack. You'll see the commands for hiding (temporarily removing) + disabling choices (greying them out) as you scroll through the help list, almost 2/3 down. The thing you have to remember though is that messages that are commanded to be hidden/disabled will STAY disabled unless you turn them back on. So, ANY time there's a possibility to make a choice with a disabled or hidden message, add this plugin command to EVERY selectable choice

ClearChoiceSettings

This will ensure the game doesn't break from having a choice permadisabled. If you use loops or labels to make the game return to a previous choice, make sure the looping point is BEFORE any logic that may disable/hide a choice so it doesn't autoenable everything if the game has to go back.

4)Make a new RPG Maker project, copy the js folder from www/data/js and open the new project alongside your other one. Then check my YEP Option core plugin and follow this path in the plugin editor

This code should work.

On a similar note, I'd also take a look at how my plugins are ordered, if your list is different. I had to meddle with the list to make sure some plugins functioned correctly. This engine is held together with duct-tape and spite, so do what this advice what you will.

Hope this helps!

[post-punk-revival]

Hi if you're autistic, otherkin/therian, or plural and you like playlists about specific things you can relate to but you don't search for them anymore because you never seem to find ones that you can relate to as the type of autistic/'kin/system/etc. you are and/or they always seem to be the same 10 indie folk songs and you have nothing against the genre especially but once in a while you would like variety, some playlists with different genres, lyrics you can't necessarily immediately relate to but can see where the playlist maker was getting the idea from, songs by lesser known artists or types of music not often featured on that kind of playlist,

First of all, are you me? Because that's so specific. Second of all when you lament that you wish there was more content for people with your preferences you usually get told to make it yourself, so since you also somehow have this exact specific complaint, I have bitten the bullet for you and am graciously forcing you to look at my terrible yet pretentious taste in music <3

Hello this is my therian & otherkin playlist, songs about being or feeling any kind of nonhuman, not even just animals but also including ghosts, aliens, robots/computers, and many other less specific and more specific things. There are a good amount of wolf/werewolf songs because that's a popular thing for songs to be about but I'm not a canine at all so I promise it's not overwhelmingly wolf-themed

This is my autism playlist, with fewer songs that have one throwaway line about how Taylor Swift was socially awkward as a kid, and more songs about feeling disenfranchised by allistic society, being dehumanized and ostracized, and dealing with trauma as an adult. Trying to go for something relatable if you're not hyperverbal or you're low masking or you grew up in special ed or you have Autism Rage or you're generally not a quirky white TikTok girlie

This is my plural/system playlist, which was originally just private and made for our hyperspecific experience so in addition to #relatable stuff it also has a lot of songs that might make no sense to other systems, but I feel like sharing it anyway as yet another ploy to get people to listen to Monofader, so.

Also just for the hell of it this is my schizospec playlist, which is actually less edgy and probably more social media pop than most of the ones on Spotify because it doesn't have any Throbbing Gristle on it, but I may as well throw this on here too because it does have Vast on it and I need people to listen to Vast I'm gonna throw myself off a bridge for this having the wrong link when I posted this

I listen to a lot of types of music. They all have vibes for every genre preference. They have Lemon Demon and Miracle Musical and Jack Stauber and even the occasional Will Wood, but they also also a lot of the progressive and metalcore and industrial music and artists with fewer listeners that I miss on these playlists. They're partially sorted by genre/vibe, to varying degrees of effort. I just like playlists with variety, and I like when I find one that's about an experience I share with the person who made it, but it has songs I've never heard by artists I've never heard of, in genres that aren't familiar to me, because yeah, despite this one thing we share, I know that the courses of our lives are different and the art we engage with is different as a result! And for just a moment, I love to experience this condition/lifestyle from a completely different perspective than what I've already heard about a million times

When I see another autism playlist with Mastermind by Taylor Swift on it, I think this person probably has had a different experience growing up autistic than I did. And that's ok that my experience was more How Soon Is Now by the Smiths. But playlists always have Mastermind and never seem to have How Soon Is Now, so if you're more of a Smiths autistic, I got you

[shadebloopnik]

Calling for help from any kind fandom citizen, I have a survey of which I am in dire need of responses for school.

So if you could answer this short survey below, it only takes like, 2-3 minutes minimum, thank you so muchhhh ⬇️⬇️⬇️

Audience's Perception on AI-Generated Works

I'll be accepting free fic commissions for responses

Reblogs are appreciated(on my knees for em)

Some tea abt why I made this survey, the very polite beef i have with my instructor, and details on the fic comms underneath

Ok, so like, long story short, our professor assigned us to make a short survey about anything related to technology and stuff like that. I figured i'd make something related to AI art, bc yknow, at least I'd be somewhat interested in the topic.

And btw, I like to say our prof is a nice guy, reeeally, but he's also, VERY pro AI, for anything. I've gotten into soft debates on that whenever there's presentations in class, and he keeps dismissing me. "Its progress" he says, and doesn't really listen whenever I talk further about it. SO, in addition to this being for my grade(smthn important, im sure), i'm also doing this to nicely shove the opinions of the crowd into his face.

So if some of the questions sound passive aggressive, please dont mind it, as he is going to be part of the editor, and I want him to see it.

also Twitter is the only thing im deadnaming, so if thats a gamechanger for you, I apologize in advance

ALSO, my extremely kind and benevolent instructor whom I just TRULY adore with all my heart (no im not gritting my teeth), have decided that it should have a minimum of 150 respondents to even be counted, a funny condition when he gave us like, barely 2 weeks but ok.

I've sent this out to people in my school and general friends more than a week ago, but I'm still lacking at LEAST 90 responses. (They suggested it was my topic that was the issue. BORING they said I just-) I only have a day or so to get more people.

SOOOO to sweeten the pot and as a form of apology.

Everyone who answers this survey can write down in their reblogs or replies a ship/prompt they'd want me to make a fic. 3 with the most popular votes gets written. Just write down the name/alias you've written in the survey with ur replies.

Minimum 2k words for each fic. It shall be posted by the end of December or early January on ao3

YES even nsfw ones, but you'll have to clarify it if it wins(im gonna be shocked if its something i truly cannot write about tbh)

I figured this is a fun way to force myself back into the writing scheme tbh. I have written some concepts before, like the AU's I had pinned, and some drabbles, but so far none that really stuck so meep

I would prefer its a fandom or ship im currently fixated on/know about, like Hazbin Hotel, Helluva Boss, Owl House, Orv, Epic, etc.

[hballegro]

the clock is here. all hail.

i forgot to turn antialiasing to the right settings with my pen so it is. the little numbers are chunky. thats life sometimes. just dont zoom in too hard. if i fix it, i wont make a new post abt it ill just edit it on to this one or something [and state that i did so in the post]

prev post with noclock version

and as promised here is also progress pics, harvested from when i sent screenshots to friends as i worked. as a bonus ive also included various layer names and the 5 different names the file went thru. the parts i [very lazily] painted over with dark blue had not been done yet, ergo anything with dark blue over it is just the picture itself so do not regard it

i will now be nice to myself and work on my fanfic and smaller drawings for a while. i will do eye posts sometimes still when i get a slow day and wanna do some peepers for 3 hours, i have collected many eyes [klinger, fr mulcahy, trapper, margaret, charles, hawkeye, bj. ive been busy stealing eyeballs to paint on. theyre all on one document its pretty funny]. i will be doing my best to force the cast into my style so i can do quick stuff.

i also WILL do more paintings of full shots again, but. fellas. ive done 3 back to back full paintings with no other digital art projects in between.

this has been NOT good planning lol

not sure if i should tag everything again so i will just. do so? idk i have not been on tumblr hardcore since like 2018 and have never regularly posted so idk proper etiquette. im gonna leave off characters for this one ig

[five-thousand-loaves-of-bread]

really really not everywhere as advanced as US & some other well known western countries with autism awareness autism acceptance. yes so many thing suck about US autism stuff but really need people know that. compare to birth country, US autism progress is heavenly.

just use birth country here as example. “cure” & “recovery” still very commonly believed & used, “my child diagnosed autism age whatever nonverbal severe but now recovered talking smiling make eye contact etc” “how can my child recover from autism” literally out of three post when look up autism, two or more like this.

intervention very much still on need “teach” (force) eye contact, that all repetitive behaviors bad, that child avoid parents because of their 24/7 nonstop “intervention” not seen as warning of maybe should rethink this but instead seen as another symptom of doomed severe autism. focus of intervention for nonverbal people is teach talk how teach talk here magic method teach talk ultimate goal teach talk “look my child was nonverbal but now talk fluent” achievement

goal is “normal” child.

“cured” “recovered” is “normal” looking “normal” behaving child. have not seen single person talk about emotions & feelings & inner stuff

old old school ABA. gold standard. but “even” that “luxury.” spend entire life savings for these interventions. thirty thousand spent on intervention, prefaced by “only.” “only thirty thousand”

there’s little to no neurodiversity positivity.

“thought about/almost did killing myself/family when child diagnosed/when raising autistic child” seen countless comments n posts like this maybe hundreds in 20 minutes desperate scrolling &. maybe three basic talk about AAC. badly

gather 100 family with nonverbal child. would consider it miracle & statistic anomaly if even one family heard of AAC. not even think positively of it. not even use it or want use it. just heard of it

someone nonverbal nonspeaking using AAC communicate fluently. unheard of. doubt even thought of as possible

if am make post about how am nonverbal & level 2/3 autistic - would 100% be called fake n not real. would be told real nonverbal autistic people all can’t understand basic concepts, not to mention able communicate & use social media like this (don’t even dare call it predominant view because feel like that imply there small group that not believe. where that small group, not sure exist here). don’t even dare mention autistic catatonia & associated late regression that in my medical records confirmed by one of top autism place in US.

talk about “mild autism” “high functioning autism” “asperger’s” as if end of world as if death sentence, one post find out husband may actually be on spectrum “mild/high functioning/aspergers” n talk about it as if end of world as if marriage shattered fall apart as if rest of own life ruined. n have that validated by EVERYONE in comments.

n then just imagine that double triple quadruple when talk about child adult who nonverbal who diagnosed severe who have behavioral problems scream cry repetitive behaviors

videos of severe nonverbal child and adult be treated not as human. n comments full of hugging parents n feeling bad for family for misfortune of having child like this

“what did do in past life to deserve this”

don’t know how describe how bad it is unless see for self. twenty years behind. underestimate. probably even more

(n then there small small group of international students that studied in US or UK with their aspie supremacist rhetoric copied from places like instagram tumblr tiktok. truly out of body shocking amazing dichotomy. sarcasm)

n this just. tamer less extreme version of what saw. because. don’t know how describe

whatever common autism myth that is be dispelled in US, it still main belief here.

seriously can’t even. don’t even know how to. there no word truly describe how am feeling.

[smarthamartha]

I read acotar and wrote an 84 page review JUST to prove I hate it

So ACOTAR is insanely popular and honestly... I. Do. Not. Get. It. My friend S (29, f) gave me a brief synopsis after she wrote her Master thesis on series YEARS ago (She studied literature and I still hope she'll post her work online one day) and I have been using that to form an "opinion" on the ACOTAR series.

My boyfriend told me I shouldn't use her opinion as my own, even though S and I like most of the same stuff. But yeah, I mean... fair. So, I decided to read it so I could form an opinion myself.

I used an audiobook on YouTube because I didn't want to spend any money, but also because I wanted to listen to it while doing chores and by using an audiobook my boyfriend would be slightly forced to listen along to it. I suffer, you suffer with me, boy!

I really didn't know much about the book, to be fair. I was aware that the main character is called Feyre, that the relationships in this book are questionable, that it's about fairies and that later books are spicy (this one should be fine), that Maas has a masters degree in creative writing and that there is a "riddle" that is really easy to solve.

Just to prove a point, I wrote a chapter by chapter review. I am a thorough queen. It's 84 pages long in my notes app. I couldn't post all of them as screenshots, so my general review of the book are photos, the chapter by chapter thoughts, comments and concerns can be read below.

Spoiler alert: I hated it (and so did my boyfriend)

Chapter 1

- "I strung my bow" HO IS U KATNISS?

- Girliepop, less thinking in fancy words and more shooting

- Drink every time "wolf" or "fairy" is mentioned

- Girl has (except for an internal monologue the length of a movie) no physical reaction to seeing a monsterous wolf

- Tiny girl skins giant wolf NO PROBLEM

- Ok was fine

Chapter 2

- Mean/evil/ungrateful (step)sisters trope?

- Feyre is obviously the youngest daughter

- Maas is trying to make Feyre likeable by making her sisters absolute asses

(it's not working)

- "We're SO poor"

- "if it weren't for ME" 🙄

- Feyre has a superiority complex and is projecting this onto her sisters

- No money for tea so Feyre decides to drink yucky warm water... How about ypu either drink cold water or try and find some herbs or flowers or something 😅

- There would be no food or money if Feyre didn't hunt. HO IS U KATNISS?

- The "gentlemanly" fingers of her father

- You're poor WE GET IT

Chapter 3

- The concersation with the acolyte reminds me of Christians pushing their beliefs on others even though they said they were not interested. Even more so when they keep insisting they just "have to come over once just to see"

- Feyre taking about the skin of her sisters being shreddable... girl that's psycho 😂

- poison from at least 4+ monts ago may eventually kill or cripple (??) the mercenary?

- first mention of (loveless and quiet and frankly quite boring) sex

- Feyre asks herself if she's still going to be able to do the shmexy timz when Isaac is married 😂 GIRL WHAT

- Isaac took a contraseptive brew... progressive i guess?

Chapter 4

- Tiny girl plans to fight big beast with a table knife or a (rusty) nail

- And why do we think the fae are allergic to steel?

- treaty says: "a life for a life" which humans apparently forgot... (has no-one ever double checked? Cuz this sounds like gaslighting to me)

- What is the thing with Maas and ribbons?

- Again, Feyre is surprisingly calm and ready to attack

- a life for a life... Plz send Nesta you clearly despise her

- "ok FINE I'll come and join" 🙃

- "Bruises are easier to hide than poverty" ?????????

- *dramarisc* "Feyre don't go you are the only person who can care for us how will we ever surv- kbyeeeee"

Chapter 5

- The wolf is gonna be a guy isn't it?

- I'm pro locking Feyre up in a dungeon with only water and bread... but knowing this book it is probably going to be a sex dungeon so... pass.

- 50 shades of beast

- This chapter is just as long as the road that took them to the wall... surprisingly short.

Chapter 6

- HOLD UP is this a beauty and the beast retelling? Beast kidnaps girl?

- AGAIN WITH THE RIBBONS?

- you grew up with chants and songs about fairies so you know not to eat or drink anything... yet STILL nobody double checked the treaty? Idk seems like an oversight

- Yep, the monster IS a dude!

- "My captor or savoir, whatever he is" girl are you confused? Definitely not the second one 😂

- FINALLY a physical reaction! Breath!

- Girl still has some fight in her

- There is one with a fake eye, cool! Is he a fairy pirate?

- Wowowowow wait... she is being bathed, gets a haircut and is being plucked like a chicken? ✨️spa day✨️

- No but seriously though... Nobody seems to know what Feyre is doing there so maybe the dungeon isn't such a bad idea?

- Why is everyone like "She only needed a single arrow to murder him. So yeah let her run wild, no biggie!

- Another physical reaction! Trembling!

- "I tried not to cringe at the warning" yeah well I am trying not to cringe whilst reading this book

Chapter 7

- "Your skills with females" GOOD GRIEF

- "Because killing us is easier in pants" 😂

- Feyre is being asked about her hobbies. Her answer is "No I don't have them" because she can't explain her paintings to them. What kind of monstrosities those must be then. (Ok yeah I know about the paint quality but besides that...?)

- "The fae can't lie" yeah but somehow I DON'T BELIEVE IT

- "A shared look between the two males" men. Men. Is the word you are looking for.

- Feyre looks at herself in the mirror and basically describes a skeleton. She is worried Tamlin won't have any compliments for her because she's not perfect (like he is, according to her)... ok is this what people think young girls who have to hunt to keep their families fed and out of poverty are concerning about?

- "Fairy bastard" oof Feyre, shots fired

- Masks being fused with faces due to a curse is frickin' cool, I love it.

- The sickness ok yeah I kinda dig it

- Why is Feyre scared the blight will cross the wall? There is no magic there? It won't do anything to her family... right?

Chapter 8

- Distrust from both sides

- Tiny girl wants to attack 2 "males" who can turn into giant beasts with a table knife (part 2)

- Was busy doing other stuff but eyes were rolled

Chapter 9

- honestly I don't know why but these characters are SO BLAND

- I like Lucien and his creepy eye though

- "I admire your balls, Feyre" lol

- Ok but WHY have the past 6 chapters been about the exact same thing. "Should I stay or should I escape?" - "You can/may but we'd rather you didn't" and again and again and again...

- SO CAN SHE LEAVE OR NAH?

- I sense Feyre is gonna do something stupid

- Yep, love Lucien and his magical eye

Chapter 10

- Yo the bogge is pretty scary and I love it

- I get it, feyre. I, too, am curious about Luciens' eye

- Tamlin control yourself you emotionally unstable fairy bastard

Chapter 11

- Oopsie Daisy that's not pappie

- Feyre you're repeating yourself again! - We're on chapter 11 and you've talked about the treaty what feels like 27 times. Yes we know how you got there... I WAS THERE WHEN IT HAPPENED!

- Ok we have seen 3 monsters so far, but is anything going to happen with them or...?

- My GOD this book is frustrating

- Feyre talks about Tamlin as him being a "natural born predator" 🚩

- *sigh* YES FEYRE WE KNOW YOU HAVE TO STAY THERE

- Something interesting happens but it turns out to be a dream... what is this? The fight in beaking dawn?

Chapter 12

- RIP Bogge

- I sense sexual tension between Tamlin and Lucien tbh

- Feyre talking about her survival instincts is killing me 😂

- Yep, there is that superiority complex again

- Also there we have that "boohoo poor me" complex again

- Yes Tamlin is a vicious beast who can kill anything in his way, we know

- So ehm... guess what? This chapter is literally more of the same stuff we already know... (again, what a surprise)

Chapter 13

- A WEEK!? IT HAS ONLY BEEN A WEEK?

- Feyre basically can't read nor write... taking note

- Ok she is learning, good for you

- The mural sounds cool

- My friend sent me a picture of the map AND IT'S THE BLOODY UNITED KINGDOM?

- I ADORE the different courts, though

- Feyre has some big feelings about a children's book

- "I was still a child, unfinished and raw" ick

- Feyre doesn't mind writing with ink in Tamlins books, because he is rich so he should be able to replace a few. The nerve. Is that how we treat other people's posessions?

- Lucien... don't give her any ideas...

Chapter 14

- Prettyyyy

- I am listening to an audiobook and the reader keeps pronouncing "mural" the same way as "suriel" and it is annoying me.

- MY BOWELS TURNED WATERY 😂

- Tamlin is a high lord confirmed (I prefer Lucien tho)

- "I tucked away my fear" Where? In the pocket of your big girl pants?

- "Human woman" When the Suriel knows better than the Fae. (Well, Tamlin sees Feyre as his posession, but "human woman" is still better than "female")

Chapter 15

- I really am digging the monsters

- "my bones groaned" ???

- Tamlin to the rescue

- Soooo grounded or nah?

- Feyre constantly wants to alarm her family... but what are they gonna do? What difference does this info make to them? Feyre, you are CONSTANTLY moaning about the 'fact' that you are the only capable person in your whole darn family (or at least in your eyes), but now they should know about this thing that:

1) doesn't influence them

And

2) they are unable to do anything about....So why even bother?

Chapter 16

- People "produce like rabbits" and the fae are rarely able to produce "younglings"... yuck, really, use normal words and descriptions

- "I never looked lovely a day in my life" oh Feyre you are such a teenager

- Dun dun duuunnnnn the fae CAN lie (oh how i am not even slightly surprised)

- "ofcourse we can lie, how else do we get them to trust us?" ...... HUH? ���

- Iron WON'T kill them, and irony probably won't either... cuz they are that oblivious to common sense *ba dun tsssss*

- Yet again Feyre just so happens to do the impossible as a human and everyone is bamboozled (except for me)

- Is he coming onto her? The girl who murdered his friend? I still find this SO WEIRD that this is her 'punishment' for involuntary manslaughter BUT OK

- Tamlin changing the minds of Feyres family is so friggin intrusive i hate it

- Again: all of this could have been avoided if someone double checked the treaty, no?

- *Sigh*

- Feyre wants to paint, ok girlie do your arts and crafts

- Heck yeah a gallery

Chapter 17

- OMG! Somethings new is happening!

- "She took my wings" gave me chills

- Yeah yeah she took your wings (Sarah J Maas is constantly repeating herself... both to fill her chapters without actually adding anything of value to the plot, as well as just repeating literal text. I hate it)

- Poor fairy

- Feyre be lying again, or is making promises she can't keep

- RIP Summer court fairy you will be missed

- Ok wow what, this was honestly a good chapter compared to the rest

- What a breath of fresh air

Chapter 18

- Liquid starlight sounds ABSOLUTELY MAGICAL i want it

- Lucien is... NOT GAY? 😭

- Human killing fae? Sure, come and live with us. Here, beautiful dresses and even servants, just for you! Fae crossing border from one court to another? Death! Death to you! Tamlin with his double standards

- Low key love Luciens backstory, still think it should have been a boyfriend tho

- "I took pride in myself that my fingers didn't tremble once" looool

- They are... going in the water

- Yep, clothes are already off

- Oh Feyre 🙄

- Idk what it is but the chapters seem to be getting slightly better, but maybe it's just because I have lowered my standards. Or have I weirdly been getting into it?

Chapter 19

- Feyre paints for weeks on end and nothing looks remotely decent

- "It was a mating present"????

- "He said, caressing my bones" wut?

- Sexual tension

- Crossing "releasing a breath i didnt know I was holding" off of my book cliché bingo

- He... purred 😵‍💫

- He flipped and landed on his feet... Tamlin is a cat confirmed

- The poem 😂😂😂

- It's giving Ken singing Wonderwall to Barbie

- "I dont like losing so i took it upon myself to become good at them" you are talking about writing limericks... being nearly immortal must be boring AF (I am not saying writing poems is boring, but honey you have all the time in the world and THIS is the best you can do???)

- His poetry is as good as her painting

- The "mating bond" makes marriage insignificant BIG YUCK

- Feyre THE FIRST THING your brain does is go to the question if there have ever been mating bonds with humans and Fae?

- Tamlins father was a Tyrant but because they were mated tamlins mother never said anything bad about him... how awful is it to realise your perfect person is a horrible person?

- Fate be like: ✨️here, an abusive relationship for you, for the rest of your long and very fucking miserable life✨️

- I thought this was like a "true love" thing but it seems like it is an unexplainable attraction like "imprinting" in Twilight? Which makes 0 fucking sense and is hella concerning imo...

- What if you're stuck with someone who has an alpha male type mentality like ew

- What if the person you are mated with is a pedophile?

- Do people think this mating thing is romantic? Because that is fucking INSANE and NOT in a cutesy positive romantic exciting sort of way

- I have so many questions

- Lucien what the hell 😭 You are so gay for Tamlin and you're jealous now but you don't even realise it it's so sad

- This evil lady better be the big bad because where the hell is this book going

Chapter 20

- Ominous requests to stay inside

- This girl never listens, does she? 😅

- "The most beautiful man i'd ever seen" oh come on 🙄

Chapter 21

- "The monsters have been let out of their cages tonight so I'm free to roam wherever I like" what the heck is going on?

- "I hated feeling like a disobedient child" THEN DON'T DO STUPID SHIT

- "Tam will allow great and terrible magic to enter his body and the magic will cease control over his mind and body and soul and turn him into a hunter. It will fill him with his sole purpose, to find a maiden." But nobody knows who the maiden will be. Sooooo basically... rape?

- A path to a cave with fairy females ready to be his mate, but HOW do you know it is going to be one of them? Also- this is not te same 'mate' as the strong love bond? This one isnt permanent??

- He does this EVERY YEAR? They ALL do?

- "Once he made his choice we're free to mingle" Jezus fucking christ it's an orgy

- Oh shit they do this MULTIPLE times a year then?

- "She had come to the hill on her own free will" is the bare fucking minimum of consent, Sarah

- Called it. He wants Feyre. Ofcourse.

- "He reeked of magic"

- HE BIT HER?! WTF

- The person reading the audioboek I am listening to has a cold and she sounds awful, which makes this chapter a little bit better (because funny), yet soooo much worse 😂

- Nopenopenopenopenope 🚩

- Is it because it is problematic or because I am probably too asexual for this (possibly both)

- He is LITERALLY a predator in this moment

- Feyre KNOWS he is not himself, but she is not scared nor does she say no, but she didn't give consent either

- Shit's gonna be awkward at breakfast

- Spicy ❌️

- Problematic ✔️

Chapter 22

- "A night of celebrating" well that's one way to put it...

- We happened to meet in the hallway so I just bit her

- Still not over the ritualistic rape

- Feyre: "Everyone snoops in this house"... something about a pot and a kettle, girlie

- Ok Feyres paintings are... fine i guess

- "You were there when they wrecked your father's legs" - "well SOMEONE had to tell them to stop" girl, please 😅

- Oh the yearning...

- Tamlin blames Feyre for not adhering to the treaty... just wait until she can read

- He's so broody

- Honestly Tamlin should just get like a hobby, he seems in dire need of stress relief. I suggest crochet or collecting stamps or something... or press flowers from the garden and make collages.

- Feyre is jealous of Tamlins many "female" lovers, with fancy titles (and oh no they must all be so beautiful).

Girl why are you:

1) surprised

2) mad/jealous/sad

3) forgetting he literally kidnapped you

4) thinking you're the first "interesting" person ever crossing his path?

Chapter 23

- What the hell is happening

- Is he gonna turn her into a fairy? Feyre the fairy? Can he do that?

- Oof a kiss, nonono says Feyre. But my door last night, it wasn't locked 😂

- Kissy kissy nonetheless

- Feyre: who saw "the most handsome man ever" yesterday, got bitten by her captor and clearly doesn't know how to feel about it all yet: "Oohhh he's so ☁️dreamy☁️"

Chapter 24

- Feyre realizing Tamlin used magic so she wouldn't see all the fairies in the court is both hilarious and sick af at the same time. You mean baby girl couldn't see other people but they could see her?

- Heck yeah chopped off head

- Night court aka dark aka evil?

- That other dude was from night court, right? You know, the most beautiful man ever?

- "This is their idea of a prank" ????

- "Omg no no you really shouldn't feel bad that you kidnapped me, you are not your family. I luckily never felt like a prisoner even though I am never allowed to go home, if I take 1 step outside a thousand different monsters will come at me, I deliberately get little information so that I remain helpless and unaware, my family no longer remembers me, my environment was enchanted so that I could not see others, I have wondered endlessly whether I will have to stay here for the rest of my life, you bit me and are trying to seduce me halfway... but you don't have to worry about all that because you are beautiful and I was allowed to finger paint so all is forgiven xoxo"

Chapter 25

- I love stories loosely influenced by the pagan calendar or phases of the seasons and the moon and the sun... connecting to nature instead of religion

- Yes to summer solstice (which ofcourse is not specifically pagan but the fae are clearly supposed to be "magical" so a writer with a religious background like Maas will obviously draw her inspiration from stuff this because ooohhh sounds a bit like witchcraft. I'm ok with it)

- Just wondering if she is gonna turn this sexual as well...

- "I am going to paint you" HAHAHA HELP

- 💃🏼💃🏼💃🏼

- Pretty

- Love de wisps, they remind me of Brave

- Oh boi they smoochin'

- Say it with me kids:

🚩 "If he kidnaps you, but is nice to you, it's still a red flag."

🚩 "If he kidnaps you, but gives you pretty clothes, it's still a red flag."

🚩 "If he kidnaps you, but lets you paint, it's still a red flag."

🚩 "If he kidnaps you, but lets you do fun stuff, it's still a red flag."

🚩 "If he kidnaps you and bites your neck and isn't quite himself from time to time, it's quite definitely a red flag."

🚩 "If he kidnaps you, but you fall in love with him, it's called Stockholm Syndrome... and yes girliepop, that's ALSO a big red flag."

Chapter 26

- Luce and Tam bicker like a married couple

- Yeah so... is anything actually going to happen with those monsters?

- Blight kills 24 people. RIP in peace

- The blight is everything except for the night court... so it OBVIOUSLY originates there, right?

- Footsteps oop

- Ayo another one of Feyres "saviors"

- Himbo

- Mr steal your girl probably

- Feyre getting all hot and bothered

- Amaranthas whore 😂

- "You DARE to put a glamor on me!?"

- Still not over the fact that Lucien isn't gay

- So many feral men

- So many emotional men

- WHAT IS SO SPECIAL ABOUT FEYRE?

I. DO. NOT. GET. IT. Just get rid of her because nobody cares...

- Why keep protecting her? This story makes NO SENSE (they probably need her for something but at least mention it n we're 26 chapters in, dangit)

- Bad boy Rhysant be like "kneel lol"

- So who is this Amarantha? Big boss lady who somehow owns a high fae from the night court? Is she badass? Like *actually* badass?

- Poof he gone

Chapter 27

- FEYRE CAN GO HOME! Is this the end of the book that doesn't go anywhere? No? Okay...

- "What about the treaty" so we're still pretending this thing exists? Ok...

- Feyre: *gets what she wants, to finally go home*

- Also Feyre: "I don't wanna" 😭

- No worries you'll be back this series has more books sadly

- They are both 'breathing' each other's names

- Seriously regretting using an audiobook for this

- Feyre and Tamlin getting steamy. Knowing her, she now has "what she wants" (Tamlin) - so now she'll probably be wanting something else... my guess is "the most beautiful man she has ever seen"

- Goodbye sex

- Feyre matching his freak scratching 'n shit

- Took a nap, did it again but this time boring

- Oh nooo she really has to gooo (sarcasm)

- Oop he said the L word AWKWARD

Chapter 28

- I want to see Feyre in this wack ass outfit

- "My paintings... they're yours" ROFL

- Girlie saw literal monsters, killed a giant wolf man, realised people could see her when she thought she was alone... but now she is in a carriage on her way home and NOW she's terrified?

- There is the L word again

- Feyre can't say it back (drama)

- A "Chateau"? Ho is u French?

- YAY mean sisters

- Plot twist they all rich now

- Sis didn't marry, feel like this is relevant

- Guess what, there is Feyres superiority complex again. Ofcourse you made a big mistake in leaving the spring court, what are they gonna do without you? (Sarcasm)

Chapter 29

- TLDR; Elain is actually an ok person, Nesta is eepy creepy odd, they don't (?) really like being rich ??? and Nesta wanted to visit Feyre but had to turn back (also Feyre I am so over being in your head...)

Chapter 30

- Feyre meets Isaac again (this better be something for the plot and not more filler)

- "He looked so human" girliepop imma say it one more time, you're annoying, stop it.

- "When I left he was a boy and now he blossomed into a man" Sarah please 🙄

- All these riches are unnatural, magical, fake... how are you ok with this and not worried everything will go to shit when the blight grows stronger?

- Oop Nesta

- Daddy issues

Chapter 31

- Something with consequences to your actions, Feyre... a girl is probably dead because of you

- Ok this setup is actually good, would you look at that

- There is that superiority/savior complex again Feyre, have you learned nothing?

- Soooo... what are you gonna do when you're there?

- Yet again they be like "kbye"

- GIRL stop whining about Tamtam, he is a walking and talking red freaking flag 🚩

- "Even if i had to tie him down to listen" 😂

- Hello? Where y'all at?

Chapter 32

- "I gave myself one minute" ooh gurl have you been to therapy? Cuz that's what you learn in therapy 🤩 Is Feyre secretly a self-critical person who likes to work on herself? Hahahaha nah, this girl is so full of herself but "hides" it behind a few minor "insecurities" aka "AM I BEAUTIFUL ENOUGH FOR A FAIRY?"

- Alis ayyyy

- So Amarantha IS the big bad (finally, after 32 chapters this story is finally going somewhere, I am delighted)

- "You want the truth, girl" ALIS I LOVE YOU, YOU SASSY QUEEN 😂

- She took Tampon to some underground cave court. Ok. I guess i know where Feyre is going

- Please let her be a giant bat or something

Ok, this is confusing so let me list it for my brain:

- Amarantha came 100 years ago

- Fought next to the king for 50 years

- She a bad beesh and not the fun kind

- Amarantha loves her sister

- Sister is also a bad beesh but falls in love with a human

- human man is, as to no-ones surprise, an actual asshat

- BETRAYAL

- A ball... in her honor? Didn't we JUST learn she was a very cruel person?

- Amarantha be like "curse you all"

- "Stole their powers from where they originated inside their bodies" and "Plucked like an apple" ??? Huh

- Amarantha been holding a grudge for wayyy to freaking long

- SHE is the blight

- Oh OFCOURSE Feyre was the solution 😂

- "Had you not have been so blind for your own heart" BRUH KIDNAPPED HER what are you on about

- Tampon be like: slavery bad

- Amazon be like: get in my bed

- Tiny: ew no lol

- Amygdala: aww 😭 you made me big mad

- Also: I lust for you (ick)

- "Bile rose in my throat" girl me too

- Guy just doesnt like girl so she gives him a reason to...

- Another ball... who goes to these? Who likes this fuck ass mad woman?

- Oh Tammy, that was a shitty move

- *hates people herself* Y'know who imma let you help break the curse? A human! Suuuure, give him a reason to connect with humankind again

- What a... ridiculously complicated case

- A human can save you BUT it has to be a girl BUT she has to hate fairies (y'know, Feyre... the kid with the fairy name? Sure) BUT she would also want/be able to kill a fairy BUT not just any one, one of your court BUT it actually has to be without knowing what she's doing and without provoking BUT she has to be courted afterwards BUT really it just has to resemble my sister's suffering ok...

- Oddly specific, I friggin' hate it.

- THE TREATY WAS A LIE, OBVIOUSLY

- poor Tam 😭😂

- She had to say I love you?? 😂 oof girl

- I am laughing my ass off this is so dumb. Like, I KNOW this is a fairytale retelling but geez Louise make it a little interesting het is so lame

- Am I supposed to feel bad for Tam?

- I'm convinced that Maas wrote Feyre's story first and then thought "Ok shit that's oddly specific I just have to write the curse exactly as it happened to Feyre because otherwise it doesn't make sense lol" like, i'm 100% sure that woman based Amaranthas story on Feyre and not the other way around, and it shows...

- Amarantha has so much potential to be an interesting character but she's so flat and cartoony it's actually so very disappointing

- Tamlin wasn't allowed to say anything to Feyre? Idk if that makes it better tbh

- Some of my friends who have read the book praise Maas' world building. How? Huh? What? Is THIS Amaranthas incentive? Is she mad because of her sister? Or because Tandem won't do the devil's tango with her? Is creativity in the room with us? It's giving "Imma put you all to sleep because I wasn't allowed to come to the baptism", also her SISTER is the one who got betrayed, not her? Kill all people bc my sister endured something traumatic and my himbo wouldn't sleep with me? Bitch please get a grip. (Talking to Sarah just fyi)

- I am ACTUALLY real fucking mad, I had *some* expecting for this book, but it is actually just shit.

- I have so many questions about this

- They couldn't say anything so they had to lie. Where does the "fairies can't lie" thing come from then?

- "Yeah go ahead and cross the border and hope someone kills you lol" (stupid)

- Also, how many fairies have been killed? By hunters and older women? I thought they were very hard to kill? Feyre I got some sad news for you that's gonna break your egocentric little heart

- They didn't just escape when they realised it was a farmer who was gonna kill them? 😂 aren't they like giant beasts? Don't you need ash wood or immense brute strength or something? Yikes.

- The children of the blessed came over the wall BUT not as brides BUT they were all killed by... blah blah and blah stop yes but-ing your story makes no fucking sense.

- Review ❌️

- Rant ✔️

- "All you had to do is say that you loved him you stupid stupid girl" .2 seconds ago you said she couldn't have known, why so angry suddenly?

- 3 DAYS 😂 WHY DID YOU LET HER GO THEN

- Does he *actually* love her or no because if no, double ew

- Yeahyeah lethal and vicious and oehlala tralala 🙄

- What is this with locked up powers, are we ever gonna see them again?

- Dumb, dumb, stupid, dumb

- I am over it tbh, can I rage quit this book?

- She keeps powers locked up? But she has her own dark powers also?

- Zense? It makes zero.

- There is Feyre again, she's gonna save the world with the power of stubbornness and being really fucking annoyed

- "Your flesh is paperthin" you mean skin?

- Her wild brown hair like glistening mud 😂

- FEYRE 🤦🏼‍♀️🤦🏼‍♀️🤦🏼‍♀️

- Feyre wholeheartedly doesn't believe in fate... nor cauldrons

Chapter 33

- Feyre on a mission

- Yeah girlie you do you boo kbye

- "I took several breaths" another one for the bingo

Chapter 34

- Again with the groaning bones

- Amarantha isn't a timeless beauty, ofcourse... cuz she's evil

- "To paint her, would have driven me to madness" OK FEYRE

- "Obviously, Amarantha purred" oh please

- Feyre still trying to break the oddly specific curse is sending me 😂

- Ok Almond is already getting on my nerves, she is not intriguing whatsoever, with her white, perfect teeth 🙄

- Eye ring? It's Luciens eye, isnt it?

- It's giving that giant eyeball ring from the Sims every townie is wearing

- "I have never seen her before"

- "Even now he is trying to protect me" *sigh* leave him be.

- "She fingered the bone on her necklace" nope, not a good enough reason to use the word "fingered"

- Feyre has watery bowels again

- A riddle and his curse will be broken

- One task every full moon. Ew. Is this some lycanthrope kink thing?

- Yes! Throw her in a cell!

- Ok, go for the riddle, the terms are flimsy so just agree and figure it out, you smartass

- Jk, Feyre keeps doing dumb shit so... eh

- still confused about their faith and that wack ass couldron

- Prediction: She won't figure it out until the very last minute

Chapter 35

- Oh sweet, sweet Feyre... they can never make me like you

- "How can you be so foolish?" Yeah well...

- "Well I'm here now" lol

- Ok sure someone else's eye not Luciens

- Maas is suddenly shifting the tone of this book and I am honestly wondering who this is for? It previously was a YA tbh

- "I tried not to look up at Claire's rotting body" honestly best line in this whole chapter

- "Humans all look alike to me" Que!?!

- "Tonight tonight, my plans I make, tomorrow tomorrow, the baby I take. The queen will never win the game, for Rumpelstiltskin I MEAN FEYRE is my name"

- For fucks sake, stop purring

- What is this conversation for again?

- *sigh*

- Riddle time

Ok, a little context: a friend who told me about ACOTAR, has told me about this riddle before I read the book. So yes, going into it I knew the answer of the riddle.

However, this is basically how our conversation went:

* The riddle goes like this: "There are those who seek me a lifetime but never we meet"

- Love. The answer is love.

* "And those I kiss but who trample me beneath ungrateful feet."

- Oh no wait...

* No, no, that's it, you got it!

- Really?

* Yep

- ... oh

*Want me to go on?

- Nah.

So ehm... yeah. Make of that what you will

- Feyres brain immediately going to diseases is hilarious to me

- Here we go from savior to boohoo help me I am so human and mortal and stupid and probably not very attractive and I probably won't find the solution because I have never known "love" in my entire life

- Back in the dungeon, lots of time to think

- Wondering why Feyre didn't ask for Amarantha to write it down, but then again her reading is shit sooooo

- Time for the full moon

Chapter 36

- Ok so... Feyre is literally *just* a toy

- "Hunt this"

- This world has sandworms like Dune or that giant worm from spongebob

- Finally some action

- "It was blind" aha

- This is actually a good chapter, well done!

- Big ass scary worm has a teeny tiny nose somewhere apparently cuz it can smell

- "She is building a trap" smort

- "She has just become invisible" nice

- "My knees and ankles groaned" girl maybe you should go see a doctor

- "Anyone could have done that" sure, Almond, sure.

- Back in your cell, you

- Soooo... why did we do this during a full moon? Was it a were-wyrm?

Chapter 37

- Broody handsome dude creepin'

- "I'll heal your arm for 2 weeks of you"

- What is it with all this "you owe me so I'll own you"-shit?

- Feyre establishes that evil hot guy does evil things

- "For Tamlin I would sell my soul" Feyre, stop saying dumb shit. I'm serious.

- Big fan of Feyre locked up in a dungeon (although wondering when she'll do something stupid again)

- Aaaaaand... there it is 🙃

- HE GAVE HER A TATTOO??? Dude did you just mark her like a cow or a pig?

- Oh noooooo... shocking jow much I do not care for Feyre, Tamlin, this shadow guy... tbh the only character like is Lucien.

- Oh Rhys... so dark and ✨️mysterious✨️ (barf)

- No. Just... No.

Chapter 38

- Cinderelli Cinderelli...

- Oh look it's him again 🙄

- "Each of us has a beast beneath our skin, roaring to get out. While your Tamlin prefers fur, I find wings and talons to be more entertaining"

- Look, I KNOW this is supposed to be some kind of "look how cool and magical we are" thing, but honestly... it's just giving beastiality

- I am now imagining Tamlin in a fursuit and Rhys flapping his arms with sheets of black plastic pretending to be a bat... help

- "His powerful male body" yes yes ok thanks for confirming he is, in fact, a man

- Showoff... why does it remind me of a kid in school acting mysterious yet interesting?

- "Admirable or stupid" the answer is the second one, Riverdance

- Feyre still can't figure out the riddle

- "Cheating are you?" Well if there are no specifics given it is indeed not cheating

- YES BUT she said we can't help you so we won't (says the dude who helped her heal) - Popular mean girl from high school says we can't and I'm cool and want to stay cool so listen up or I might not be cool anymore

- "Here, a gift. For having the balls to even ask" 😂

- "He purred as he walked out" ew

Chapter 39

- "I gobbled it down" Feyres inside beast is a turkey

- The tattoo blinked 😂

- First a free tattoo, now free bodypaint!

- Prisoner gets makeover and a very shmexy dress, makes perfect sense!

- Yeah Riddler, how DARE you objectify me (I mean I objectify you too but that's different)

- Also, consent? Yeah never heard of her

- This book is so incredibly cringe, dang

- What is this chapter??

- "I did such a foolish thing" yeah no shit

- "We made a bargain" ok how many times are they going to repeat this or explain it as if we weren't literally there?

- Feyre be like: "Rhys with the wings and the talons, lurking behind that beautiful, flawless surface" bla bla hubba hubba 🙄

- "That handkerchief he called a dress" lol

- Great, drug wine

- Lucien be like "HeY i WaS gOnNa CoMe YoU jUsT hAd To WaIt" 😾

- Oaths apparently mean nothing to these people...?

- "I barked"

- "Just a week every month, for the rest of my life"... girl, sleepovers at Rhys is low key the personification of you being on your period - inconvenient, painful and probably bloody

- Hilarious how this girl is being co-kidnapped/parented by two men...

- "There was a tall, handsome..." YES FEYRE JUST LIKE EVERYBODY ELSE HERE parently, keep it in your pants

- "The summer court fairy cringed" SAME

- Feyres watery bowels at it again

- RIP he dead

- The last part of this chapter wasn't that bad, it just establishes what we already knew about Amarantha. But ok sure, it's fine I guess.

- Every single hot dude is a walking and talking red flag. Tbh, Rhys is just as bad as Tamlin. Feeding her spiked wine and letting other people do stuff to her? Wtf?

Chapter 40

- What was the point of these trials again? Fun for Amarantha?

- Lucien is literally the only character i don't find insufferable

- Feyres "one is bad cuz it's solitary so it's Amarantha and two is tamlin and me and three is too many like three sisters" 😂 girl you're going cray cray

- Just pull a lever, Kronk

- I, too, would like a tattoo that would help me cheat on tests

- If you're pure evil... how are you suddenly 'honest' in a game? Just cheat? Make sure it's all rigged? Pull any lever - ur ded hehe (no but seriously why give Feyre a chance to win at all?)

- "He licked away a tear" 😵‍💫 BRO WTF

- "It was disgusting" well look at that, I am finally agreeing with Feyre. How far we've come.

Chapter 41

- "... and her pincers are not so kind"

Me: *snorts*

"The other creature snorted that pig noise"

Me: woah wtf 😂

- "I trusted Nesta" DO YOU NOW?

- The descriptions in this chapter are actually pretty good and I must say it's been a while since I enjoyed something in this book

Chapter 42

- "What I felt for him was wild and hard and burning" 🙄

- Biting again

- "Our bones danced" *sums up some random dances as if Feyre knows anything about dancing "no *broody* it was a death dance" lmao I can't

- Fairy sex obviously is wild animalistic sex

- SWEET JEZUS STOP PURRING

- "His eyes flickered" ✔️ bingo

- So many things groan in this book... bones, doors, fae...

- "Forcing himself into me, in the space where I still could taste Tamlin" WTF 🚩🚩

- (talking about Rhys and Amarantha) "How it would hurt to be enslaved by someone like that" oy Feyre, YOU ARE.

- Ohhh, you're groping and mouth fucking her JUST to make Tamling angry! Hahahaha ofcourse it's aaaalll good now

- Rhys, you disgust me

- "Feyre, for cauldrons' sake" 😂

- Also Rhys be like: "Oh but I am not touching you below so it's fine"

- "It is the only way to convince him I was on your side. Believe me, I would have loved nothing more than to enjoy you" maaaaaan get a grip

- "Beyond the obvious? And he gestured to his perfect face" oh he is so fucking full of himself I'm over it

- "My father killed Tamlins father, and his brothers" oh how I did see this coming

- "What a mess." This book? Yes.

Chapter 43

- "She pouted" Omg!! I know who Amarantha reminds me of! It's king George from Hamilton 😂 she is just as (not at all) scary and intimidating as him! Only difference is - King George is also a big baby, but he is still somewhat silly (like his dance) and that is the only thing that is likeable about him. Amarantha is just "fear me for I am an evil sex goddess/queen and my wrath will rain upon you" but all I feel is like "Ma'am you should try therapy and stop bullying others. You should learn to work on yourself, maybe then people will actually like you"

- Final test: murder

- One of these victims is gonna be someone she knows, right? Probably Lucien, Tamlin or one of her sisters

- Honestly at this point I do not care if Feyre dies. Nor do I care about her internal monologue and 'struggles' tbh.

- RIP fairy 1

- No way back now, Feyre.

- Ofcourse it's Tamlin

- Thankfully it's not Lucien

- *Feyre rambling*

- All this in the span of... a few seconds?

- *Feyre only now contemplating suicide*

- Put 1 and 2 together, girliepop...

- Tamlin is a vampire confirmed

- (definitely not) RIP Tamlin

Chapter 44

- Told ya

- "Feyre didn't tell me WHEN I had to release them" woah what a lame "twist" but then again seems on brand 🤦🏼‍♀️

- Amarantha you sore loser

- Back again with the "Yes but..."

- "Say that you don't love him" Amarantha spat SEE IT'S KING GEORGE 😂

- THIS is how she figures the riddle our? Oh please...

Chapter 45

- And... why did she die now?

- Don't worry she won't stay dead sadly

- Sorrows, sorrows

- Maas trying to redeem Tamlin

- I'm so happy it's almost over...

Chapter 46

- "I felt strong and fast" is giving "You're incredibly fast, and strong... I know what you are... vampire" 😂

- Feyre - the girl with the fairy name - evolved and will now probably be even more insufferable

- "What had they done" 😭 girl this is your wet dream and we all know it

- "with a predator stillness" yuck

- What in the victory fuckery...

- This is basically Bella acclimating to becoming a vampire

- So Feyre still has to go to Rhys, even after dying? I'm pretty sure dying helps getting you out of contracts

- "Home" oh please 🙄

- After all that and she's still swooning like a teenage girl over the guy who literally kidnapped her... ok

[wings-of-ink]

Hear ye, hear ye!

All of you who have been anxiously awaiting Chapter 4 can send a big thank you to the Microsoft mayhem that happened on Friday. Because of it, I have had two entire, unprecedented, days off of work during which all I did was write and edit chapter 4! Stuff like this never happens to me either, so I ate it up. My work computer is still super broken too, so who knows what will happen tomorrow, lol.

So, chapter 4, barring anything disastrous that I do not yet foresee – is coming very soon. Like, any day this week soon. For now, I am looking for bugs and other errors until I feel comfortable getting the update loaded. I will also be updating the warning list and some things on the itch page. I keep feeling like I'm forgetting something I wanted to do, and am having a hell of a time remembering what it was…

Anyway, if it interests you, more details below!

In going through some of the Google Error Reports, I had a couple that I either could not resolve or find.

It was reported that checking player stats in chapter 1 would not work – that it would flash only for a moment. I could not recreate this. If anyone else has seen this, please let me know.

In the end of chapter 2 where there are multiple ways to spend your time there seems to be some issues with how choices become unselectable after certain clicks and it just doesn't seem to function correctly. I have fixed the issues I have found, but could not recreate all of the instances that were reported. This section may get an overhaul in the future since I understand the coding a bit more now.

It was also reported that fonts are not changing. There is definitely a weird issue with this and it will take some time for me to sit down and hammer out. The fonts do change for me, but notably, I don't think they are switching to the correct font types. They don't even appear to be the same fonts from when I first starting this project, lol. This issue is on hold for now.

The last 2 bonus segments for the end of chapter 3 are being pushed aside for the time being. I kept finding myself feeling like I was hammering them into the chapter and it was a little exhausting. If I force it, it will be less enjoyable to read. The segments that are missing are the ones for hanging out with Zahn and Nathanael. Zahn's is easy to wiggle in elsewhere at least, but I'm not sure if Nathan's will make it in or not. We'll see, my motivation was purely for chapter 4, so now that it is ready to go, I'll have another crack at it before I drop or move them completely. They aren't super important to the story, but are just for fun (and if Oswin got his, it's only fair that Zahn gets theirs too). That last section of chapter 3 ended up way too long, so it may get adjusted later anyway.

As with any work in progress, I can't guarantee that your old saves will work. That's probably how we are going to have to roll for a bit until I really get things nice and smooth. Eventually, I will add an option to start from a later chapter and go through and make the (MANY) relevant choices to skip ahead. This may be implemented when Chapter 6 is ready to go since all the ROs will be available.

I also want to figure out how to implement named saves to make it easier for you to sort. I appreciate IFs that feature this, but I do not yet know how to do it, but I'm going to research. I like to play through with several MCs, and I'd like to offer enough info in the saves and/or Stats Menu that you can do this and easily know who you are playing as. Let me know what you would like most in the Player Stats Menu too. Note, that some options do not appear here until you choose them in the story.

Coming up…

Since Chapter 4 is down, I will soon be posting a big poll about future IFs. I've been compiling info for it here and there for a couple weeks on possible options for me to write in conjunction with God-Cursed. So, stay tuned for that in the coming days.

I will FINALLY get to my inbox in earnest as well! I will keep reaction asks paused until further notice since they take me the longest to answer. Feel free to still send in comments or quicker questions. If your question is too spoilery to answer, I will not be able to post about it.

Anyway, hope you are all doing well! I can't wait to see what you think of chapter 4. I hope you enjoy it. I'll get it out just as soon as I feel comfortable enough with it. ^_^

[eatsbooks]

Hellooo Pookie do you have any WIPs https://ih1.redbubble.net/image.925298497.5443/flat,750x,075,f-pad,750x1000,f8f8f8.jpg (image cuz I'm anon 🧍)

hello my chicken nugget❣️the only wip i have that isn’t eiteio and is like actually in progress and not just quietly incubating in my brain is modern!azris at a music festival, but it’s lowkey in purgatory until i can make myself not hate it. (i was going to post it for the azris week free day and literally could not make myself finish it.) also one of azriel in the cuck chair talking another fae through fucking eris until his restraint snaps that i have lovingly temp named cuckriel. but that one has like nothing written so … here’s a lil festi!azris below the cut<3

The crowd is swallowing him whole, an endless miasma of willow-branch limbs and grinning, starry-eyed faces. The air is clogged both with the dust displaced under so many feet and the crunch of noise rattling into the stuff of his bones. So burdened, it chokes each breath he forces in, then stutters out. His skin is too-tight over his flesh, trapping his heartbeat, pushing on it until he can feel its fluttery pulse in his throat, his fingertips, his belly.

Eris, having been staring at the technicolor stage without seeing much of anything at all for some time now, abruptly turns away. He shoves out towards the nearest edge of the dancers without so much as a word called to those who dragged him to this wretched hippie hellscape. They pressed the crystal-filled capsule into his palm like he should already know what it was or what to do with it, and he could not bring himself to admit that he did not. He cannot now admit to not being able to handle whatever it is going to do to him.

But it is harder to hide that certainty from himself.

Even where the bodies become sparse and the air begins to clear, this dread in his chest remains heavy. Worse yet, it is no longer content to stay contained. Thorny tendrils of it crawl up his throat, no matter how he tries to swallow them down. They weave around his veins and constrict him from the inside, pin-prick gouges into each rush of his blood.

His heart is going to burst out of his chest. He can feel it trying—succeeding. It is going to stop, here, surrounded by these filthy, obscenely dressed children, suffocated by the truest perversity of music as an art form: electronic dance music.

What is left of his reputation will be ruined the moment his body is found. He will be yet another stain on the Vanserra name, known to the tabloids forevermore as the petulant heir found overdosed at a music festival and to his father as an even more bitter disappointment than he has been over the course of his life. Even posthumously, he will be able to outdo himself one final time. It would be better, he thinks, to go back into the crowd before this happens, let himself be trampled to nothing underfoot so that, at the very least, he is unrecognizable when the medics pu—

Someone sprays water into his face. Someone has the audacity to spray water into his face. As if he is some sort of misbehaving dog.

Eris claws towards awareness enough to look over at the mass of a man standing beside him, large and imposing, currently tucking a small spray bottle into the side pocket of his backpack.

“What the fuck?” Eris demands.

The guy frowns slightly, then shrugs. “Helps,” he says, unhelpfully, and adds nothing more.

Eris stares at him. “Helps—what?”

From beneath the fabric he has draped as though a hood over his head, the man only watches Eris, seemingly in wait for something.

Eris is about to ask if the drugs he’s obviously on have damaged his brain when a rare breeze flutters through and settles the mist into his skin. In a thousand small, separate dots, it cools. Each one travels down beneath his skin, into muscle, into bone, unwinding at the tightness throughout his body. Even his heart rate is no longer a startling thing.

The beat of it feels only like being alive.

“Oh,” Eris sighs, rolling onto the balls of his feet and bouncing on them. He settles and says, “Yes. That did help.”

The man nods, then turns back to the stage. As he does, the lights spearing through the night sky in bursts and beams catch on the planes of his face—all different colors, painting him fleetingly but richly, saturating him through.

Green and yellow. Red and blue, then purple. Orange. Green and yellow again.

Like looking through a kaleidoscope.

“Eris,” he says suddenly, hearing a smile in his words. He hears the music more for what it is now, too, and that brings him back to bouncing on the balls of his feet. “My name’s Eris. What’s your name?”

The man looks to him as if startled to find him still there, which strikes Eris as particularly funny. He says something, but with the music between them, Eris cannot quite make it out.

Eris moves closer so that he can hear better. With this proximity, he must tilt his head back to see the kaleidoscope-face properly.

“Azriel,” the man repeats. His lips are full and blue around the shape of his name, then red when they tip up into a smile, like he finds Eris amusing.

Distantly, far in the back of his mind, Eris thinks he should find this irritating, to be a source of amusement for someone who attends this sort of event — but he smiles in return, enjoying the stretch of his own mouth across his face. He smiles even brighter into that feeling.

“Cool name,” he says. A warmth is suffusing his body, and tingles have begun running from his scalp to his spine as the air takes to flirting with his skin. “This is my first time at something like this.”

“Y’don’t say,” the man—Azriel—responds.

Eris only halfway hears this beneath the waves of sound rolling through him from the stage, beneath the distraction of two glowing girls nearby. Their hands are dancing between them. A flash of color, then another.

It takes Eris a moment to make sense of it: bracelets, beaded and every-hued, being traded between them.

He looks down at his own wrists, which are bare. All of him, in fact, seems rather drab compared to the bright world around him. He remembers that he had been offered a bracelet earlier in the weekend, but he had turned it down, thought it garish. He cannot imagine how he thought that, now. There is a story within their colors, a string of tiny planets to form a whole universe—and if he got a red one, it would match his hair.

The girls look kind, and their skin sparkles under the lights besides. He thinks they would be kind enough to give him a bracelet if he asked.

“Do you want one?”

At once, his focus is pulled into the voice at his side, which is richer than he remembers it being when he heard it last. The sort of voice that pebbles at the skin in the hearing; the sort of voice that feels like a lover running a finger down the spine as they pass by in a crowded room, beckoning you along, bidding you to follow.

“What?” Eris asks.

The man—Azriel—tips his chin in gesture to his side. Eris follows this from the sculpt of his upper arm down to the tattoos peeking out from the sleeve at his elbow down to the bulge of veins webbing along his wrist, where he eventually alights upon a trove of bracelets he had not noticed before.

Eris gasps. He bounces back up to Azriel, not having noticed how he had begun gravitating towards the girls he was watching, and leans in close as the other man holds his arms up between them.

“Do you— Well, I really wanted a red one. For my hair. Do you have a red one?” No, Eris thinks, Azriel is being so kind in offering at all; he doesn’t need to be picky. “Actually, it’s alright if you don’t.”

“I do.”

Eris spots it then. In the same moment, a rogue strobe light flashes between them. It draws his attention lower, and—

“Woah. What happened to your hands?”

Azriel makes to move them away, but he doesn’t get very far, and Eris does not notice that he tried to besides. He is already cupping them both in his own, running the pads of his fingers along the rippled texture, which shines brightly where he turns them into the painted light—a mosaic on his skin.

“They look so cool,” Eris says. “Seriously, I wish my hands looked like this.” He tips his head back to smile up at Azriel, who he finds looking very intently down at him. His smile wanes, just slightly. “Oh, fuck. That was fucked up of me to say. I don’t know why I said that.” He blinks, realizing for the first time that he has well and truly succumbed to whatever it was that he took. “It, uh— I wouldn’t have said that if—”

“It’s alright,” Azriel says.

“No, I—”

“Really. People usually pretend they don’t notice. It’s cool, you thinking they look cool.”

Eris does not just smile now. He grins, one with the other starry-eyed faces constellated around him—one with the proper joy on the mouth his attention has been captivated by. “Yeah?”

“Yeah.” Azriel lifts his wrist between their tangled eyeline. “Want your kandi now?”

“Mhm,” Eris sounds, nodding—or otherwise just bouncing again. “Will you teach me the,” and here, he wiggles his fingers, distracted momentarily by the wind dancing in their crooks, “the, ah, handshake, too?”

Azriel holds up two fingers, and Eris presses the tips of his to them. “Peace.”

Azriel makes half of a heart with his hand, and Eris completes it with his own. “Love.”

Azriel holds his hand out flat, and Eris presses his palm against it. “Unity.”

Azriel intertwines their fingers, and Eris feels this down to his toes. “Respect.”

Across the bridge of them, Azriel rolls a red, beaded bracelet from his own wrist to Eris’s. There is a cherry charm dangling from it, as well as white, bold-lettered beads. It takes Eris a moment, what with the dark of the night and the slight fluttering of his eyes, but he eventually makes out: FEST VIRGIN

Eris laughs then, like he cannot ever recall laughing before. Free and without reservation. When he rights his head again, he notices that Azriel has gone starry-eyed, too.

[sch-com]

Specific manifestations of schizoid PD in my life

see similar post for anakastic PD / OCPD

When I first heard of my personality disorders, it was hard for me to notice their role in my life. Part of it was that I was younger, and with less experiences, but part of it was that by nature PDs are so ingrained it's hard to see the full scope of their influence. Particularly I struggled to see the "dysfunction" part - I was thinking that sure, I do experience that, but is it really that bad? And you can't have a PD without the dysfunction, so do I even count? I think that now, after some time and more reflections, I can say I do see the dysfunction, so I thought to share my observations.

Using the DSM V criteria for schizoid PD:

1/ Neither wants nor likes close relationships, counting being part of a family / Has no close friends other than immediate relatives

When I was first moving out for university, I didn't really have any close enough friends I would feel truly comfortable moving with. It limited my choices, and influenced the one I ultimately made (a mistake).

Also, when I was moved out and experienced my first full-blown mental health crisis, I didn't have anyone around me to rely on.

Studying in uni is much harder when I am not talking with people in my class. Normally students support each other, share notes etc I imagine. I have to do everything alone.

Talking to people = opportunities. And support. Real, material support of being physically near. Going to places together, someone having a job opprotunity, hell even having anyone around in case of an emergency.

I suspect at least part of my emotional problems can be attributed to my self-imposed isolation. Occassionaly when I do talk to someone, it's like... an altered mental state, in a good way. When I laugh, I feel physically good. And it's easier to laugh with other people around. It's the little things I think, that are crucial and I am largely missing out on.

2/ Almost constantly picks introverted activities

Sharing what you do can help you progress faster. Sharing your art and getting critique, joining language classes. Sure I can do all of this on my own as well, but it may be sub-optimal. I think it's a matter of balance - and if I consistently choose to opt out of group activities, it could be seen as dysfunctional.

Also again, doing stuff with other people = meeting other people = getting the social connection, vital for even physical health, and gaining access to opportunities and support.

Other people can also motivate you, or keep you accountable for doing something. When I do (almost) everything on my own, I have to well, rely on my motivation / determination, which is often hard (more on that in 4/).

3/ Has little if any, thought in engaging in any sexual experiences

Frankly I am asexual, so I wouldn't say it's causing me any distress. I suppose that lack of sexual life can be viewed as lack of a major life activity, if you want to interpret it that way.

However, somewhat connected to 4/, it's hard for me to say 100% that sex life is something I truly don't want, or if it's just another thing I am opting out of out of the lack of reward. More on that below.

4/ Seldom derives pleasure from any activities

The emotional implications are written into the criterium itself. Lack of pleasure is I think dysfunctional already.

But, adding on the above - lack of pleasure/satisfaction definitely made me lose a lot of motivation for doing anything. I have disengaged from hobbies because of it. I have disengaged from studies, from social activities, from even simple things watching movies, reading, or cooking a good meal because of this. I have to force myself to do pretty much anything. There is not a single thing that I do simply because I truly enjoy it - I need another reason on top, like an obligation.

What I mean by the above, is that... I think I have opted out of things because they don't bring me much emotional reward, not the other way around (so it's NOT that I don't get a lot of joy because I don't do things). I remember when I was younger and more active in life, doing something like travelling, or acomplishing something, and emotionally not getting anything out of it. So I wished I was just in bed and not doing the thing, because at least it's less effort, for the same emotional reward (= lack thereof). And as I became an adult with more control over my day-to-day, I stopped many major life activities because I can. And it's all the same.

5/ Appears apathetic to the admiration or disapproval of others

For me it's largely related to 4/, because I don't get much internal reward from external stimuli, it also manifests in how this criterium describes it.

I've had people believe in me in the past. Try to encourage me, praise me, tell me they see a potential. But I... couldn't believe them. I don't feel this, it's all the same if I am awarded something or not. External rewards don't cause internal reaction, so like why bother? Why bother going after this hard thing, winning a competition, if after I acomplished it it's all the same void? I put the effort into something, only for this to not matter. So I stopped putting so much effort.

I think it may also discourage others from trying to help me, because historically I haven't shown much reaction, or improvement, or gratefulness for their honest efforts. To give up on me, because I seem like this empty shell of a person. But I don't really know, I think it would have to be someone else to confirm this.

6/ Shows emotional coldness, detachment, or flattened affectivity

People told me that I appear flat and so it's hard for them to read me. It's hard to know what I think, and some became afraid that I was judging them, when I... I don't? Overall, this one makes it really hard to connect to others and to be understood. So it makes me feel even more like an alien.

I have also hurt people because of this. Because I detach, I isolate, I forget about people. I am the friend you have to message to get a conversation, or schedule a meetup, because I don't initiate. I know it's a hard position to be in, and I don't want to hurt anyone, so I only disengaged more to not even have any friends that would care about me enough to be hurt by my isolation.

Because I seem all the same (flat and withdrawn) all the time, it's harder to notice when I am struggling. I can be in the throws of depression and actively suicidal, but outward appear pretty much the same. So people don't believe me, not even professionals, and I have been neglected because of this.

[lilolilyr]

Summary: By an old Republic law, all members of the Jedi High Council are senators in the Galactic Senate, and can thus be voted in as chancellor. A Senator from a less prominent planet has had enough of Chancellor Palpatine's incompetence and calls for a Vote of No-Confidence and the installation of Jedi Master Obi-Wan Kenobi as Supreme Chancellor of the Galactic Republic. This one action becomes the catalyst that changes the direction of the galaxy. (or: “Obi-Wan’s Life Gets Worse. Though It’s Not As Bad As It Could’ve Been”.

131k words, rated T, still in progress!

https://archiveofourown.org/series/1266236

I highly recommend everyone read this and give @stonefreeak some love, the fic is so hilarious and emotional and just really really good!

You can find a more detailed (and highly spoilery!!) summary below the cut.

I don't have a tag list for Star Wars content yet - lmk if you want to be pinged when I post more! I regularly share fic recs and occasionally write some shorter fics myself as well.

More Star Wars Recs By Me • My Star Wars

~~~ continue reading ~~~

I always write summaries to wips and stuff I want to continue reading some other time, so I won't struggle with mixing up fics and half-remembered plotlines... Because this one is so long, I've run out of summary space on my bookmark, so I thought I'd transfer it to this post!

If you're also starting to read it and might not finish it in one go, or want to keep up with future updates, I recommend y'all's save this post so you can check what you already know :D

Ft: many characters, and written in different POVs

From Canon: Obi-Wan, Anakin, Padmé, Ahsoka, Bail, Mace, Yoda, Vokara, Quinlan, Dooku, Palpatine, probably others too

Ha'han-ash: the new vice chancellor working with Obi-Wan

Senator Mandai: from a pacifist species that can't be influenced by the Force, the one who called the vote of no confidence on Palpatine

La: killer & friend of the assassin Palpatine murdered, works with Quinlan to figure out who killed her

Part 1:

Shortfic, <1k, G, no warnings apply

POV Padawan Anakin Skywalker

Anakin has a nightmare about red and rage and betrayal and crawls into Obi-Wan's bed even though he thinks he's too old for this and worries Obi-Wan will refuse him. He feels safe with Obi-Wan.

Part 2:

2k ficlet, rated T, no warnings apply

POV Obi-Wan during the Clone wars

Anti clone sentiment is widespread during the Clone Wars

Jedi still take 'regular' missions next to their duties as Generals, if it's urgent enough at least

During a mission to save slave kids during the clone wars, there is a bomb threat, and it ends with Obi-Wan being photographed topless and saving two young children (he gave most of his clothes to the kids), and turns into a sexyman holonet sensation! Anakin and Ahsoka think it's hilarious. Obi-Wan just wants to forget all about it.

Part 3:

128k WIP, rated T, Graphic Violence

POV Alternating

Clone Wars + canon-divergent future

Chapter 1-20

A senator (Mandai) from a species that can't be influenced by the force calls for:

- a vote of no confidence on Palpatine

- to install a neutral Chancellor: Master Kenobi

Both pass. Obi-Wan feels horrible about it all and the sudden changes and new responsibilities, but he'll do his duty and try his best to weed out corruption and end the war.

~

Obi-Wan then starts an investigation into Palpatine. Anakin is mad but can't deny the findings.

Ten worlds rejoin the republic.

There are several attempts on Obi-Wan's life.

~

The Chancellor's rooms have several strange and possibly sithly artifacts. Obi-Wan remembers Dooku talking about the Sith in the Senate.

Palpatine POV we can see him seeking Obi-Wan's death.

Dooku has discarded Palpatine as no longer useful.

C21-40

Palpatine turns Anakin against OW by making him think OW is neglecting the war by staying on Coruscant.

~

OW finds altered Jedi mission briefings in Palpatine's files, often altered to request OW specifically. The Jedi investigate. Bail and Padmé and handmaiden Ellé help by looking for the originals.

Palpatine is mad. "Out of the ten star systems that are working to rejoin the Republic, 4 of them are from missions Palpatine himself set up for Kenobi to go on; out of the 135 worlds that set off the Vote of No-Confidence, 56 were worlds Kenobi might never have visited if Palpatine hadn’t altered the mission specifications."

~

Obi-Wan is exhausted. Cody, Yoda and others are worried about him and look after him, forcing him to take some time to rest and sleep.

~

Senators are not used to Jedi chancellors who can't get bribed. He (anonymously so he can't refuse them) gets a lot of plants.

~

Anakin learns from Padmé that Obi-Wan has been deliberately kept from him and sent on dangerous missions, and has a panic attack.

OW and Anakin talk it all out.

Anakin keeps the investigation from Palpatine despite still trusting him and thinking someone else must be behind it.

C41-60

The Jedi High Council doesn't schedule anything on days Obi-Wan is supposed to attend council sessions so he at least gets a free day from time to time

~

Palpatine hires new assassins, they're supposed to make it look like OW is just collateral.

The bomb nearly kills him, his clone guard and several senators, does kill two senators, but OW protects those closest to him from the blast. He is impaled by debris and hears force ghost Qui-Gon while waiting for help to arrive, telling him to hang in there. He's taken to the healing halls in critical state.

Anakin is given the choice to continue his mission or return to coruscant. He chooses to go home, for Ahsoka, despite thinking it might be a test that he is failing.

Someone tries to have Palpatine reinstated as Chancellor while OW is out of commission, but it fails.

Dooku has feelings about Obi-Wan almost dying that he'd rather not have.

Palpatine killed the hired assassin after the bombing, but she managed to shoot and injured him as well as send a distress signal. Quinlan, undercover as a bounty hunter, investigates with one of the assassin's friends, La, who figures out that he's a jedi.

They find the body and Quinlan figures out the Sith Lord killed her.

C61-70

Quinlan and La think they can identify the Sith Lord by the nanobots from the assassin's gun if they just happen to come across him.

~

Palpatine does some voodoo doll style blood magic on OWK to kill him from afar while he's still in medical.

Vocara Che (with Rig Neema, Plo Koon, Yoda, Mace Windu) fights against the darkness and saves him.

Palpatine plans Order 66.

Anakin is shocked that Master Che lives together and seems to be dating Knight Rig and that Mace is friends with them.

~

The Jedi realize Anakin's padawanship was sabotaged through more than just OW being sent away, his therapist was probably murdered on a mission when he was 12.

Padme realizes Palpatine has been manipulating her and Anakin for a long time.

Padme loved Anakin but thinks they never should have married, hates the need for secrecy.

~

Obi-Wan wakes.

C71-80

Obi-Wan recovers and goes back to work.

Senators are being investigated and arrested.

Palpatine talks Anakin into believing that a dictatorship would be better than democracy because of the slow bureaucracy in the Senate.

~

Plo Koon reports that the forces of the CIS seem to struggle without (Palpatine's) Intel about strategies of the Republic. Obi-Wan suspects Palpatine as the former spy but doesn't yet tell the council as he has no proof yet.

Obi-Wan tells Shaak Tii to investigate the Clone Chips.

~

"Dooku snarls at the latest news. Slowly but surely his hold of the separatist worlds is slipping. Many have already left, and once the Republic proved that they would be reasonable during peace talks—there is no doubt in Dooku’s mind that that is entirely because of Kenobi—even more saw it as their chance to return to an improved Republic. The winds are shifting, the trajectory of the corrupt Republic is changing, unjust laws are being brought back to the Senate floor and retracted. Somehow... Somehow Obi-Wan Kenobi has managed to turn the Republic from a cesspool of corruption to a place that is slowly but surely starting to try and drag itself out of the mud."

Dooku also has nostalgic feelings about Qui-Gon, wishes he could see how far Obi-Wan has made it.

Obi-Wan meanwhile wonders whether there is still a chance to get Dooku to return to the light and the Republic.

C81+

Charges against Palpatine and Mas Amedda will go to court.

...

~~~~~~~~~~

I'll update this as I continue reading / when more chapters are published!

~

And pls appreciate my inauguration Obi-Wan with the gold embroidery and blue trim and imagine how much he Hates it Hates it Hates it xD

Feel free to use the pic just source link back to this pls

Nothing machine made to find here, this is all handmade shitty Photoshop! In the apps AndroidSketch, PhotoshopExpress, Pixlr & with remove dot bg.

Image sources: robes Obi-Wan embroidery blue belt

Star Wars font generator

Concept art + wips:

[ominous-faechild]

✦ Writer Questionnaire 2 ✦

Thanks for the tag, @the-golden-comet! (And @the-letterbox-archives tagging me when I was almost done here, haha)

Heads-up! Long post!

How long have you had your writing Tumblr/Writeblr? A fast and loose estimate is fine!

Two months ago to the date actually??? Or, at least, that's when I first uploaded a story here. My first actual Writeblr post was me hopping in on an open tag on the 6th of June, haha. I thought it was just a month, but looks like the summer's gone by in a flash! 😭

What led you to create it?

So, I'm a writer on Tapas! I'd been attempting to social network on other social medias (twitter and bluesky) but wasn't getting anywhere, didn't like the general formats, and uh... I'm sure I don't have to explain why I don't want to touch Twitter with a 10-foot-pole anymore. Let's just say, if you haven't seen, it's just as bad as (if not worse than) everyone says. Anyhow, I'd seen lots of Tumblr short stories on other platforms and started investigating what it's like here. Didn't know what "Writeblr" was or that it even existed, but eventually stumbled into the field after posting my short story. Thanks, @darkandstormydolls! ❤️

What’s your favorite thing about the Writeblr community?

How supportive everyone is??? Like omg you guys are so sweet, idk how to take it. Also I love seeing how much passion everyone else has for their writing, haha.

What’s one thing you’d like your mutuals to know about you?

Uhhhh, I think I'm pretty open about the things I'd like people to know about me, haha. I never mean to offend, so if I accidentally say something wrong, please tell me! I'm autistic and very dumb.

Is there anything you’d like to see more of on your dash?

I'm ngl I keep meaning to build out my followed tags for my fandoms, haha. The only fandoms I really see things for are TMAGP (10/10, TMA is my obsession. I am obsessed. It is one of my Special Interests and I love it with all my heart) and House of the Dragon??? Except I'm not even a fan of HotD??? So that's kinda annoying, haha. (Aka, my fandom stuff, but that's on me.)

WIP it Good

Which Works-in-Progress (WIPs) or writing projects are you noodling about, lately?

Rising From the Ashes, tragically. (Because it's one of the LAST things I should be working on right now, haha.) Otherwise, I'm of course always obsessed with the Arcane Rifts. Then I force myself to be obsessed with Sun and Shadow, though it's slowly growing on me, haha.

How long have you been working on them?

Haha, so I've historically jumped around a lot in working on different things, so these are approximate guesstimations!

Rising From the Ashes has likely had 3 or 4 years put into it/the characters. If you include the Calamity Crew (which overlaps with it in the timeline and originally ended up merging with the cast of RFtA), I'd say definitely 4 years!

The Arcane Rifts has had 5 years put into it.

Sun and Shadow is very new; I'd say it probably only has about 4 months of work in it? It's part of why I'm less interested in it, haha. Less I've put into it and less I'm attached to.

Do you remember what inspired them/what got you started?

Oh... oh dear. How could you ask me this??? 😭😭😭

Rising From the Ashes has existed since, I think, 2016. It started (tragically) as an RP starter on Google+. I wish I was kidding.

To those unaware of how it worked in that space (and likely similar ones to this day), you'd post a starter and people would join in with their own characters. 99% of the time, they'd drop out before long. However, I'd work out details of the characters in the process and carry that info over into the worldbuilding. I eventually stopped RPing with the masses and settled down with a single "partner" who I'll call Kris.

She's the one who stole my docs.

The Arcane Rifts technically originated as another RP starter? It never got attention, though, and instead my ideas for it simply carried over into the worldbuilding in general.

One of the characters of the original starter was important in the worldbuilding. It was not a character you see in the early books of tAR, though, so don't bother trying to figure it out. But, since he was so important, his origins were also important.

The Arcane Rifts started in 2019, as I wanted to make a story building out said character's origins. It was originally going to be a duology, the first book being Gene's backstory and the second being how Gene and The Other Guy's lives intertwined. (No, they were not gay for each other! 😂) It's since changed a lot, and focuses basically exclusively on Gene, haha. The last book in the series will probably be focused on the other character, though!

Sun and Shadow started for a romance novel competition on Tapas which has since ended. I didn't get to finish it in time for a lot of reasons, but I primarily cite stress and exhaustion from working full time at a physically-intensive job. It grew shockingly quickly and I had some fans donate to me related to it, so I'm kinda forced to work on it, haha. Dw--I like it! It's just harder to work on for a number of reasons, haha.

How much time, in your best estimation, do you spend thinking about them?

Tragic, the questions you're asking me--

It depends, haha. I'm autistic and hyperfixate a lot. Also, for one, that's a suuuuuper vague question??? Like what do you mean "how much time"--how much time within the day? How often in general? Idk, man, haha.

I think about the Arcane Rifts a LOT!

I've put an incredible amount of time and effort into it, and I'm in love with 90% of the characters there. Even the background characters have had a lot of work put into them, getting relatively fleshed-out backstories to make their motives understandable (even if not agreeable!), and I love them all so much, haha.

Except Katerina. She's a bitch.

I also think about Rising From the Ashes a good amount, and it's invaded my brain again lately, haha.

I took a step away from RFtA and basically all of my other stories late 2021 when Kris (my ex-writing partner) and I had a falling out. It was incredibly difficult for me emotionally to look at anything I worked with her on, and obviously RFtA was a huge one (actually, tAR was the only thing of my early works she had nothing to do with). Since early this year, I've finally been able to work on it again and it's been incredibly fun removing her stuff, actually!

I think all that is a good part of why I keep randomly getting obsessed with it again, haha. It's like looking at old friends (the characters, not Kris) and being all "omg??? I HAVEN'T SEEN YOU IN FOREVER??? PLEASE TELL ME EVERYTHING YOU'VE BEEN UP TO!!!" except it's removing Kris's stuff, haha.

I think about Sun and Shadow a lot more than you might expect with how much I talk about not preferring it, haha. I love the characters! Crow and, actually, Valyarus especially. They're both super interesting characters, and I'll randomly find my brain working out scenes between characters interacting with them.

(The problem with SaS is that, as a book, it's incredibly different from my usual works. It's a small cast of Frey/Crow and technically Daleira, while most of my stories focus on larger casts. It makes for a VERY different experience, and so it's a lot harder to work on)

When someone asks the dreaded, “What do you write about,” question, what do you usually say?

Actually, I've got a ready answer for this one! Until SaS, I was dedicating my time to the Arcane Rifts and had prepared the answer:

Percy Jackson meets Lord of the Rings in a steampunk fantasy world full of ✨mysteries waiting to be uncovered✨

(I'd say the "mysteries waiting to be uncovered" part ironically/accidentally mockingly most of the time, whoops, haha. I always feel awkward advertising my works.)

It was awkward when people would get actually interested in it from there and ask more questions, haha.

To clarify: that's my tagline for the Arcane Rifts! The story has gods and demigods messing with mortals, using them as their playthings and being REALLY immature babies because they don't really face consequences for their actions like PJ. Then, it's a lot more "grounded yet fantastical" like LotR, where magic is kinda infused with reality and yet you still have issues like starving to death and whatnot.

Let’s Rotate Blorbos

Name any characters you created.  Side characters, protagonists, antagonists, characters who’ve never been written, the first original abomination you ever pulled from your ass; whomever you’d like!

UHHHH THERE'S A LOT TO LIST???

Try this for a taste! These are just the guys I've gotten colors for!

Freya, Crow, Daleira, Valyarus, Grimnir, Soren, Gene, Tazin, Mislav, Adilzhan, Ludmila, Rada, Caspar, Nikolai, Gennadi, Oska, Rieka, Liesel, Carmin, Nora, Sammy, Kieva, Caron, Varik, Elazi, Riaan, Roman, and Tiberius! (Though Tib is getting a name change sooner or later)

Who’s the most unhinged?

Unhinged in which way? There's a lot of options there, haha.

I'm going to give honorary mentions to Valyarus, Gene in the later books, Tazin, Rieka, Gennadi, and Tiberius ! (Why does it not surprise me that most unhinged characters are from tAR? 🤣 Also I swear it's a coincidence most of the unhinged characters are red.)

(... Probably.)

In general, I'd say that, incredibly ironically, the Existence of Order is the most unhinged of all my characters. She's just incredible at hiding it.

(Tbf half of the Existentials probably belong on the "unhinged" list anyway but eh. They still don't compare to Order!)

Who comes the most naturally for you to write?

I'm going to give this as a tie between Gene and Sammy!

Gene has my 'tisms and just about all of my trauma, so we have a lot in common, whoops, haha. Also there's a... very specific detail about his character that makes him easier to write in general. It's just a major spoiler. 👀

Similarly and actually identically to Gene in some ways, while Sammy has a lot in common with me, he's also incredibly perceptive! (Although we don't share that fact.)

Due to the way I write, their analytical natures allow for them to spit straight facts about the worldbuilding and the people around them rather than beating around the bush, haha. Both are highly investigative, try to learn and understand everything around them, and notice small details other characters wouldn't! It makes it much easier for me to write, because uh... well here's an example of what my outlines look like.

Long story short: I include a lot of detail which I then transfer into the POV's character narration, cutting out details which they wouldn't notice or think about, haha. In Sammy's case (which that scene has Sammy as the narrator/POV character), very little information gets cut out because he's so perceptive!

(Here, as a treat--have another example!)

(In this scene, Nikolai is the narrator. Even the outline gets "filtered" to mirror the characters' way of thinking--like it's Nikolai himself seeing Caspar as "doll-like". The crossed-out stuff is details I most likely won't mention, but noted for myself, haha. I do the same thing if/when including details about the motives and thoughts of non-narrator characters.)

Do you ever cringe at them?

Gene and Sammy?

A B S O L U T E L Y .

Gene is a wreck in basically every way and desperately needs help (that he won't get until he meets Dimitry). As much as I love him, there's a lot of moments where you just can't help but wince and be all "shit, did you REALLY have to do/say that?"

Sammy on the other hand? He's a terrified, control freak manipulator who panics the moment he feels like he's losing control of a situation. It can be painful to watch, even if simultaneously fascinating.

How much control do you feel you have over your characters?  AKA, do they ever “write themselves,” refuse to cooperate, or do things you didn’t expect? To what degree? Are some less cooperative than others?

I explicitly go out of my way to add backstory to and develop each and every one of my characters until they "write themselves", haha.

I want my characters to feel like real people, so I do my absolute best to make them as real as possible. (That's part of why tAR is so massive...)

Special shoutout to Dimitry here, btw. Dude COMPLETELY screwed over the planned and intended from the earliest days path of the Arcane Rifts. I've mentioned before that Gene is villain-coded, yeah? Want to know why?

Because he was MEANT to be one! Then Dimitry had to come along, be the sweetest, nicest fucking person around to Gene while he was going through the worst part of his life, and keep Gene from slipping off the deep end!

MITRY, YOU PIECE OF--

Do you enjoy people asking questions about your characters? And do you have a preferred means of receiving said questions? For example, as Asks, as replies, as reblogs, as tag notes, as comments on AO3, etc.

I absolutely love, love, love!!! people asking questions about my characters!!! 🥰

I would absolutely prefer them as Asks sent to me, and especially would prefer if separate subjects/questions were sent in separate Asks! Like, say you were going to ask me about Gene and Dimitry. I'd rather two separate Asks, one asking for whatever you wanted to know about Gene and another for whatever you wanted to know about Dimitry, haha. However, if you wanted to ask a single question about both, that obviously is fine as a single Ask!

On writeblr engagement

What makes you want to follow another Writeblr account? Do you follow ‘em as you see ‘em, or take time scoping out the blog to make sure you align with its content? Do you follow based on WIPs, or vibes?

I definitely scope out before I follow, yes.

I choose based primarily on the personality of the person behind the blog, but the WIPs/vibes can also have an influence on my decision, haha. I'd rather follow people with kind/supportive personalities, and I'll eventually start liking their stories even if they're not initially my thing!

What makes you decide against following?

Bigotry. Moment I see it, I'm on the lookout for even the slightest hint of more and, if I see it, I'm OUT!

(That includes things like: homophobia, transphobia, TERFs, ableism, racism, xenophobia, etc.)

Also, while I include angst in my stories, the people who are big on "I have nothing but bad stuff in my writing and I'm proud" are, uh... not on my "follow" list. While they can write what they want and enjoy it, grimdark is not my thing. Angst is best in moderation and I very purposely control the amount of it in my life.

(Also Kris's--my ex writing partner's--obsession with "grimdark-ness" is a good part of why I'm so ecstatic to remove her stuff from my writing. Yes, I've tried it. For years. I hated it. Please and thank you. Also note that I proudly call myself an evil writer, so it's not like I don't love angst, it's just--moderation. Seriously.)

Do you interact with non-mutuals often?

Yes! I think a good 50-30% of my interactions are with non-moots, haha. I go out of my way to try to support my moots, but I'll definitely share support with anything that catches my attention, no matter who it's from!

To be fair, though, I think a majority of non-moots I interact with are on my mental "probably going to follow soon" list. I can be slow to make decisions, haha. It doesn't help that I try being active with my moots, so I'm trying to avoid growing that list too quickly!

Do your mutuals’ characters occupy space in your noodle?

Haha, depends what you mean by that? My brain is definitely too full of my own characters to have any space for anyone else's, but I definitely do think of others' characters at times! There's plenty of y'alls characters I really like, haha.

Just... omg, my hyperfixated AuDHD brain refuses to focus on anything except for the Hyperfixation of the Moment™.

This was a huge one! Hopefully I'm not screaming into the void with this one, or you guys enjoy finding out more about me and my WIPs.

If you're curious about the reason this is labeled Writer Questionnaire 2... well guess what!

Tagging (gently! This is a lot, haha): @honeybewrites @yourpenpaldee @paeliae-occasionally @mysticstarlightduck @illarian-rambling @.darkandstormydolls (tagged you earlier in the post haha) + open tags!

Divider from @cafekitsune!

[yunoteru4ever]

Things I've been meaning to read and/or post about Sakae Esuno/Future Diary but haven't yet, because time makes fools of us all

This post is probably more of a means for me to vent my own guilt RE: "why haven't I done these things yet?!" than anything.. and maybe if I'm lucky, this will motivate me to actually work on some of them. But I guess we'll see. Sorry in advance.

I posted this giant "part 1" of an intended, even-larger Big Order review ages ago (literally almost 15 months now!) but Part 2 has become this... absolute monstrosity. It's become clear to to me that trying to actually list or even summarize the differences between the Big Order manga and anime is like trying to wrap your arms around the sun. The separation points are so massive that it's partly fused with infinity, and that has become such an imposing task that is also being written for a relatively small audience that I think I need I need to seriously change my approach. I have a "Draft" saved that's huge and has barely scratched the surface, but I think I should grind that down to some simpler, more generalized descriptions before continuing. And the other part of that is that it's now been so long since I read the series that I probably need to do it again as I progress through the differences! OOOOF.

I really want to talk more on here about the Great White Whale of untranslated Sakae Esuno manga and his last original series, The Detective Akechi is Berserk! It deals with a teenage girl who has dreamed of becoming a detective who gets forced into an awkward/uncomfortable partnership with her hero, the deceased Detective Akechi, who can possess her to speak through her and who also suffers from some post-mortem madness. I think the series suffers a bit from having a lot of fanservice (the first kind) in its first volume — not that we haven't seen stuff like that from Esuno before, just that it seems to be heavier/more frequen there — and I haven't personally read past Volume 1 yet. From just flipping through the pages, it does appear to drop the fanservice trend partway into the second volume? I didn't see any of that stuff in the back half of volume 2 or in volumes 3 and 4... but again, I haven't actually READ any of them, because that will require translation work on my end, and @sunniedesi's comments on the series in this post seem to indicate that maybe the trend DOES continue in some warped-ass ways. What I can tell y'all so far is that this is closer to Hanako and the Terror of Allegory than it is to either Future Diary or Big Order. But of course, I love all THREE of those mangas, so it's not like I consider leaning towards Hanako's storytelling style to be a bad thing. Sadly, the only scanlation online is of the very first chapter... the series as a whole remains widely out of reach, so I'd really like to work on either translating it (which would be a massive undertaking) or at least generally summarizing it so I can talk about it more in the larger context of Esuno's ouvré.

Hey, guess what ELSE I still haven't read up until now??? The damned Future Diary PSP game!!! I've held out hope for too long that someone would actually patch the translation into the game proper so I could experience it as intended, but... it seems like that project is likely very dead or, at best, going to take very long to see the light of day. I've actually started to look into how that kind of thing is done myself in the hopes that maybe I could do some of the work on my end, but... it looks like a LONG uphill climb of programs/code to understand before I could pull anything off. So it's high time I stop living in denial, stop putting it off, and finally read @sunniedesi's translation of the text. It's only been just sitting there waiting for my eyeballs for TWO FUCKING YEARS, after all.

[scarletteye]

Introducing myself

Well this feels awkward •ᴗ•

I rarely make posts like these on any website but hey I gotta start somewhere, and having a blog was something that always interested me. Be it a hobby or something I can professionaly work with. And I do love yapping. So that's a big plus

Not but fr, who am I you might ask? Why am I introducing myself to the tumblr void?

Truth be told I am a silly little writer. Currently I post on A03 since I am hyperfixated on Genshin Impact, and I love love love writing. In fact I have wrote a couple of series now. Word count can reach up to 150k words. Crazy stuff.

Here are some fics I wrote that you might recognize or enjoy if you feel like looking into them!

A Puppet's Heart series

A series of 3 main books and one extra short fic, focused on Scaramouche x reader, sprinkle of Cynonari, and exploring friendships/tension between Wanderer, Cyno, Collei and Tighnari

Canon-compliant

<𝟑 The main 3 stories:

Lotus and it's Thorns

Blossom of the Divine

The Withered in Bloom

<𝟑 Extras/short fics (be warned that the second one is a smut)

1. Dendrobiums and Mourning Flowers 

2. Darling (Don't order me around)

You can read the series here: Click me

A Loving Promise Series

A work-in-progress series, focused on Childe x reader, in which Childe is a bit yandere (ok maybe a lot yandere) and forced marriage is a big thing. Childe's lore is very impactful here, especially abyss stuff

Canon-compliant, will have multiple parts of the series

The Main story:

Ornament of Heart

You can read the series here: Click me

The Ghost of Inazuma

A standalone fic, focused on Kazuha x Kazuha's friend (Tomo) and detective Heziou. In this one Kazuha has a side-hustle as an assassin and things get very heated when the Tenryou comission starts hunting him down. Heizou is among them, of course, as a lead detective

You can the book here: Click me

Ambush and Revenge

A short whump fic centered around Heizou and the dangers of his job. He gets ambushed and hurt, and explores a bit of Heizou's friendship with Kujou Sara

You can read the fic here: Click me

Murder and Drama - A Midnight Case

A short detective fic about Heizou and the Arataki Gang, mostly focused on humor (wow me not writing hardcore angst?? shocker). The Arataki Gang gets framed for murder and Heizou has to solve the case with Itto's brilliant help (Itto lies when he is nervous).

You can read the fic here: Click me

In conclusion

As you can see I write a lot and yapp a lot, and if you enjoy my writing feel free to follow my tumblr blog. I want to write more and am thinking about opening comissions. So if you enjoy my writing style and ideas I would be more than happy to take requests! I generally have a lot of ideas/headcannons and thoughts to share about Genshin and their characters, even if its not related to my fics. Always happy to discuss stuff with people so don't be scared to share your thoughts or questions!

That is all for now! Thank you for taking the time to read my introduction <3

[icaruslamenting]

⌗ !! ꒰ 31 days of helpol ꒱ 🏛️

(but i’m 10 days late😨)

(this post was NOT proofread)

day one - “who was there first deity you began worshipping? do you still worship them now?”

Lord Apollo has been my deity ever since the start, but the first deity i ever actually prayed to was Lady Nyx. i wasn’t even a hellenic polytheist yet, had no clue the religion existed, but i felt compelled to do it and it felt right. so Lady Nyx started me on this journey and Lord Apollo has guided me through it <3

day two - “which deity did you most recently start worshipping?”

most recently i would say Lord Dionysus, which is crazy because i’ve been worshipping him for a while. i haven’t started recently with any new deities because im really forcing myself to take it slow now. last time i rushed it and then i had to take a break for months, so i wanna do it right this time.

day three - “how long ago did you start hellenic polytheism”

i started sometime back in april (i think??), so about 8 months now!! granted, part of that i was taking a break, but i always had faith in my religion the whole time. i thought if the gods, did small things for them, stuff like that. i just wasn’t super active with my practice anymore.

day four - “are there any deities you don’t currently worship but want to learn about?”

Asclepius, Eros, and Helios!! i want to work with them, but im making myself take it slow for now (as i said) because im trying to not put too much on myself. i’m still starting and learning, and i don’t want to mess up or overwhelm myself. when im ready though, i can’t wait to work with them <33

day five - “how much have bonded with your deities?”

quite a bit, but obviously not as much as others. i’ve mainly bonded with Lord Apollo and sometimes i can feel his presence or he’s more responsive in divination, but i’d say that about where we are right now.

day six - “what’s one way you incorporate hellenic polytheism into your routine?”

scrolling through tumblr (this is my hellenic polytheism only blog), making things for them, seeing something and saying “oh, that reminds me of them”, and little things like that. i also have a thing on finch for “work with my deities” so that helps me make sure i do something for them everyday. sometimes i space out and almost forget to pray to them or do a devotional act that day, but i want to do something every day for them, so the reminder helps lol

day seven - “are you openly a hellenic polytheist offline? how does being open/not being open affect your worship?”

i’m open with my friends about it, but not family. i’m 99% sure my parents know though, and they don’t give a shit. like my mom even said “oh, i should’ve gotten you tarot cards for your birthday!! i’ll get you some for christmas!!” and she got me this witchy bag from joann fabrics. the only way not being open about it affects my worship is no alter, but that’s really only because i’m living at my grandparents house rn. as soon as we’re out, i can finally light candles, incense, make alters, buy statues, stuff like that.

day eight - “do you have alter(s)?”

nope. but i really want to make one!! specially for Lady Aphrodite and Lord Apollo!! (i sort of have one for Lord Dionysus though which is just my pile of posters from various theatre shows i’ve seen/been in)

day nine - “is there a practice among other hellenic polytheists that you’re skeptical about?”

not really. maybe candle divination?? though that’s one i’ve seen the community kind of split on. candles are tricky, as are incense, but i think sometimes there’s obvious undeniable signs from those. just… don’t take every little movement as a sign. wind exists.

day ten - “what’s something you learned about hellenic polytheism that you wish you knew sooner?”

tiktok is pretty unreliable (though there’s a few good creators on there) and you don’t need to rush yourself. it’s okay to not be making insane progress everyday. do things when your ready.

[grey-eyed-gemini]

The Library Project

I love books, and i love reading. I absolutely have used and abused library cards my whole life, and I have owned lots of books. But something I've noticed recently, is. The books i own? Quite a few i haven't read recently. And we're really getting to capacity for my shelves. So at the start of the year I decided that, throughout the year, im going to read every book on my shelves, and really think about whether I want to keep it, or if I'm ready to let it go.

Why every book? Because, let's be honest, some books are on my shelves as nostalgia. I loved them then, so obviously I'd still love them now, right? But. That's not necessarily true. And my tastes have definitely changed. Plus, growing up poor, theres a definite "but it's *mine*!" Mentality that I'm trying to work on, since I don't want to end up a hoarder. (Having helped deal with FOUR fucking hoarder estates now, im definitely motivated to not end up buried in *stuff*.)

So, basically, everything has to be evaluated, everything has to hit the chopping block, at least a little bit. Therefore, a major rule was i had to finish a shelf before I could go on to the next one- no skipping series just because "Well obviously id keep those". No. Not how this work. And I came up with basic questions to really force myself to make the hard choices, no wishy washy maybes, it either stays, or goes.

Did I finish the book? Obvious, but opens to door to what to do with DNFs. In my case, if I DNFed a book, the entire series is now forfeit.

Did I enjoy the book? Again, obvious, but i have convinced myself to keep books before for various reasons, even if I didn't like it. So this deals with that.

Would I read the book again in a years time? Ah, longevity. As i said before, I'm a big proponent of libraries, so it's not worth it to me to keep a book i read once and enjoyed, but wouldn't pick up again and again. Space is a premium here.

Would I haul it across the world? This is for those really hard books, where for one reason or another I feel guilty getting rid of them. But this question really forces me to step back and consider- are they worth hauling to Germany or Australia or Antarctica? Is the time and effort of packing them worth it? Or could I get them out of a library when I reach the other side? Strange as it may seem, I have gotten to this question multiple times so far.

So, now with the admin for this project out of the way, time to share my first two shelves of progress! Spoiler warning for basically every book I discuss.

What a difference, ey? As I said, I went by shelf, so I'm gonna go over everything in order:

Chanters of Tremaris by Kate Constable: KEEP

Rose shades ON. This is a nostalgia series for me, and while the reread revealed its weaknesses in pacing and writing, i love so much of the world building and the messages and ideas that Constanble was trying to share, and many I feel are still relevant now. Again, I know it has issues, and it is really a 3 star series at max, but if she ever rewrote them and expanded on what she has here? First in line to get them. They are also hard af to find copies of, so getting rid of them would really shoot myself in the foot.

Taste of Lightning by Kate Constable: TOSS

Rose shades OFF this sequel sucks so much ass and I had to slog to finish it. I could literally write a rant post about everything I hated (and I still might) and I still would feel fiery rage in my heart 0/5 should've DNFed

Song of the Lioness by Tamora Pierce: REPLACE

So i love Pierce. I love her so much. And Alannas story is really where Tortall begins. She's not my absolute fav, but gotta respect the starting point. However. I dislike or outright hate so many of the covers for her books it's not even funny. But! Illumicrate did a fabulous set which i pre-ordered and is due sometime in the next three weeks, at which point, alannas story will be back on my shelves.

The Immortals by Tamora Pierce: KEEP

Alanna is where Tortall starts, but Daine is where it really steps away from the rest of the high fantasy pack. Wild magic? Spidrens? Mother fucking STORMWINGS? Iconic, all around. The romance isn't to my taste but most aren't so I dont hold that against them.

Protector of the Small by Tamora Pierce: KEEP

MY GIRL. MY ICON. MY ABSOLUTE BELOVED. KELADRY OF MINDELAN. My first Pierce book was Squire, and gods has nothing else really compared. The world building, the characters, the plot. Chefs kiss 5 stars all around literally perfect my only quible is the deus ex machina in Lady Knight but I can overlook it.

Trickster's Duology by Tamora Pierce: TOSS

Andddd then we come back down with an absolute crash. Alys story has always been bottom of the heap for me, and I thought it was just because I liked the others more. But on reread, it became clear- alys story is, well. Boring. The only stand out moment in the first book is the climax with the prince, and even then, you spotted it coming a mile away. And while book two definitely is better, it comes at the cost of being dependent on book one for all our character intros. I literally had to go back and double check who was who multiple times. The only parts I enjoyed were Alys 'letters from home' visions- which is a problem! The set is also the Pierce books which feel the most classically YA, especially with the romance. Nawat is nice, but it felt like such a kiddie romance after all the other series. So, didn't like it, won't miss it, sorry to all those who I know are die hard fans.

Provost's Dog by Tamora Pierce: KEEP/REPLACE

AND THEN WE ARE SO BACK. Beka is my second favorite after Kel, and I love the very different take on tortall her books have. We see much more of the normal, not noble or noble adjacent people that populate this world, and beka deals with some very serious stuff. It's odd that, after the very YA Trickster books, we get perhaps the most adult story with Provost, but I'm not complaining. I also like how bekas various relationships are handled, and that unlike other Pierce protags, she doesn't end up with the man she meets in book 1. And, of course, there's the cult. And the knowledge that, this is what causes so much damage in the series that followed chronologically. I love books where, you as a reader can see the tragedy coming, even tho the characters can't. Goosebumps, every time.

The Circle of Magic/The Circle Opens by Tamora Pierce: KEEP

While the Emelan books don't hold my heart like Tortall, I still find them to be fun reads. I really enjoy seeing the four grow up and find their footing in a world that really doesn't want to acknowledge children as adults. Which. Feels quite relevant.

Melting Stones by Tamora Pierce: TOSS

While this and the next two are technically a set, I don't consider them as such due to them not being interconnected. Rather, I see them as standalones that expand the world of Emelan. Anyways, I DNFed this one. Originally it was written as an audio exclusive that then was made into a book and. I could tell. It did not flow as I wanted it to. Plus I saw all the twists coming, which made me rather bored. I like Evvy and Rosethorn, but they aren't exactly who I came to see, you know?

Battle Magic by Tamora Pierce: TOSS

Gods this one had such cool concepts. I just wish it wasn't so slow to get rolling. I was over halfway and the war still hadn't started, and I was worried about how an entire war would be crammed into less then half a book. That, and the cat deaths, meant I didn't want to read it again. I know, that's probably silly, because books are supposed to make you feel things, good and bad, but having lost pets, evvys cats being murdered just. Was something I could not handle.

Will of the Empress by Tamora Pierce: REPLACE

Personally, the only true follow up to the Circle and the Circle Opens. Our favorite foursome are back together, but uh oh! They have returned changed! And must now have siblings drama while dealing with a foreign court that wants to swallow them whole! Empress really is the culmination of the Emelan books, and i highly enjoy it, even if the anti-sandry nonsense from tris, daja, and Briar is rough. Like gods damn, children, her having money and not going traveling is no reason to treat her like scum. She murdered people for fucks sake! On a side note, I like how we get hints of what the four will be doing going forward- it's a nice way to tie things up while still leaving the possibilities open.

The Old Kingdom by Garth Nix: KEEP/REPLACE

Sabriel is an icon, Lirael is an icon, Touchstone is an icon- i could go on but i won't. I love the Old Kingdom as a whole- like Tortall, it is so well built and fleshed out as a world, that you could see it and it's problems being real. However, the books not matching. Really grinds my fucking gears. Like, I know the Dillons couldn't do all the covers but come on! At least try to make them match! So I've tossed all the non-Dillon covers, got a hardbound copy of the 25th anniversary edition (which i celebrated arriving th eother day), and am going to work on getting the UK paperbacks of the books so I can have a matching sets. Is it silly? Yes. Do I care that it's silly? No.

The Left-Handed Booksellers of London by Garth Nix: KEEP

One of the series i was able to finally fit onto the shelves! Hurray! They were languishing on the living room table for wayyyy too long. Where the old kingdom is dark and serious, LHBSL is dark and fun. I love our punk protag, I love the romance between her and merlin (shocking, since most YA romance i cannot stand), and most of all, I love how much this series is a love letter to England and it's mythos. Plus her dad's a rock god! (badum tsch)

Percy Jackson and the Olympians/Heroes of Olympus/the Kane Chronicles/Magnus Chase and the Gods of Asgard by Rick Riordan: TOSS

Now. For the rather giant elephant in the room. So, I would consider myself a longtime fan of Riordan. I first read The Lightning Thief for battle of the books in middle school, and had read literally every one of the books on my shelf. However, on reread. It was hard not to notice how PJATO is definitely a middle grade book. And while I enjoyed it, I didn't love it. And then right after was HOO, which i DNFed in the first book because I began to remember how little I liked the later books. And then I read Red Pyramid and when I finished I sat there and was just. Not motivated to pick up book two. Are Riordan books bad? No, definitely not, but i think that at this point I've simply. outgrown them. And while I'd pick up PJATO again, it wouldn't be within the next year. And its cemented itself as a modern classic so thoroughly that I know i could find it in most library systems, including my current one. So. With all that in mind. I've let them go.

And on that note, that finishes shelf 1 and 2! It was a bit more of a rollercoaster ride then I expected, but i don't regret any of my choices. I'm now working on shelves 3 and 4, which are a bit rougher because it's more authors with lots of short series or standalones, so don't know how long it'll take me, but I'm really glad to be making visible progress.

If you read all this inane rambling, thanks for your time, hope you enjoyed, and hopefully no one kills me for smalling a book they loved. We can only hope.

[frecciabianca]

how do you people manage to actually finish fics... ive had a lucaso fic unfinished for over a month now and i fear at this rate its never going to see the light of day

you're asking this to the person who hasn't finished and posted anything in over a month we're in this hell together 😭

my trick is usually to just go super hyperfixation mode and do nothing else but write for a week until it's done so i don't know if i have much good advice </3 sometimes time away is helpful though, especially if you feel stuck with it. i'll often convince myself something is terrible and then i'll come back to it after a break like "wait this is good actually". another problem i run into a lot that stops me from finishing things is just plain dissatisfaction with where a scene is going, which involves a lot of painful rereading and trying to identify the root cause and then unpicking from that point to start rewriting.

i think in general the key to writing consistently is having a good point to start from (this is why opening a fic is misery) and also having even a rough idea of where it's going so you always have the next moments in mind to motivate you. i don't always plan everything but more often than not lately i end up making a bullet point summary beforehand that i can add to as ideas or even random sentences come to me so then i have something to work off. even if you don't make one beforehand it can really help when you're stuck, because it forces you to think about what the key moments are and get an overhead view of the story's overall progression and themes and that can make your direction more clear.

these may not be applicable/useful to you and there's often no fix for when you just straight up cannot write (me rn) but i hope this is something at least </3 there's no harm in just sitting on something for a while or never posting it at all. writing is always for your own enjoyment first and foremost, so even the stuff that doesn't get posted is still important proof of your efforts and progress towards the next one! i believe in u 🙏