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#god i. i will never get over being cheated on. its horrible. fucking horrible.
3knecrotic · 8 months
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I miss hym. I miss those Good memories. I miss it so much right now. God I want to fucking die over it.
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octopiys · 1 year
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Some incorrect quotes and scenes for the pies
Roach: *Screams*
Ghost: *Screams louder to establish dominance*
Capt. MacTavish: Should we do something?
Capt. Price: No, I want to see who wins.
-
Alejandro: You lying, cheating, piece of shit!
Valeria: Oh yeah? You’re the idiot who thinks you can get away with everything you do. WELCOME TO THE REAL WORLD
Alejandro: I’m leaving you, and I’M TAKING RODOLFO WITH ME
Rodolfo, picking up the monopoly board: I think we’re gonna stop playing now.
Price: You know, not every problem can be solved with a knife.
Ghost: That's why I carry two knives.
-
Soap: I made tea.
Ghost: I don’t want tea.
Soap: ....I did not make tea for you. This is my tea.
Ghost: Then why are you telling me?
Soap: It is a conversation starter.
Ghost: That’s a lousy conversation starter.
Soap: Oh, is it? We are conversing. Checkmate.
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Gaz: Is letting someone win at chess sapiosexual bottoming
Price, putting his head in his hands: Does anyone in this goddamn team ever think before they speak-
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Graves: Must be hard not being able to laugh
Alejandro: I do have a sense of humor you know
Graves: I’ve never heard you laugh before
Alejandro: I’ve never heard you say anything funny
Graves:
Graves: fuck you
Alejandro: fuck you
-
Soap, motioning to a Halloween display: All these ghosts! All these ghosts! I still can’t find a boo.
Ghost:
Ghost: is it because I said I didn't want your tea-
Soap: YES ITS BECAUSE YOU SAID YOU DIDNT WANT MY TEA
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Ghost: Schrödinger’s cat is overrated. If you wanna see something that’s both dead and alive you can talk to me any time of the day.
Gaz, just finding out that Ghost is legally dead:
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Gaz: Why isn’t the statue smirking at me?
Price: It isn’t smirking at anyone, they’re all just imagining it.
Soap: Three of us saw it, Cap. How do you explain that?
Price: *points at Soap* Sleep deprivation. *points at König* Paranoia. *points at Ghost* Delusional personality disorder.
Gaz:
Gaz: damn.
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Roze: What’s something you guys are better than Horangi at?
Hutch: Mario Kart.
O'Conor: Yeah, video games.
König: Emotional vulnerability
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Graves: *Gets down on one knee*
Alejandro: Oh my god, it’s finally happening.
Graves: *Falls over*
Alejandro: The poison is kicking in.
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Gaz, after falling out of a heli for the third time: Do you take constructive criticism?
Nikolai: I only take cash or credit.
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Soap: Can you keep a secret?
Ghost: Do you know anything about my life?
Soap: No I do not. Good point.
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Gaz: Hey heads up if you try to make a candle with food coloring, the food coloring will just sink to the bottom of the glass, and when the flame eventually reaches the bottom all the food coloring will catch fire and become one giant tall flame that you cannot possibly blow out and the glass will start to crack and then you'll throw your tea on it in a panic and then the extremely hot food coloring will boil and sizzle horribly and then the glass will shatter. Please take my word on this haha-
Roach: What did you-?
Gaz: A MISTAKE WAS MADE
-
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I just wanna say thank you all sm for 300 followers! You all r loved and I'm not good with responses but I appreciate them all so muck, thank u again :DDDDD
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t00thpasteface · 9 months
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How do you like the mash movie?
I saw the series first, my dad is a fan and we used to watch it together, and was surprised at its more serious tone. Frank Burns also struck me as also a pathetic idiot but in such a different way and also has these evil vibes. Because of you I discovered the books, got them, and im having even more shocks!
i fucking LOVED IT. i was absolutely HOWLING the entire time. my favorite bits were:
the opening where you see the dangling arms of the bodies in the choppers??? oh my god. i was like GASP. the insane blood and gore was awesome and really drove home how petty and wacky everyone's being
hawkeye's stupid tinted glasses and bucket hat <3 sooo 70s.
mulcahy getting immediately ignored the second he's introduced. mulcahy basically acting like a frightened mouse in every scene he has. he is so sad. he's really not cut out for this
frank being introduced as an aggressive bible thumper (very funny contrast to the likeable and shy priest) so him cheating on his wife with margaret, who is also married, is even funnier
radar(!!) being the one who puts the mic under frank and margaret's bed
mulcahy hearing them bang, leaning in bc he thinks it's a radio program he enjoys, and going D: when he Realizes
suicide is painless. holy shit. did you know a 14 y/o wrote the lyrics? his dad said "i needed the lyrics to be extremely stupid, and 14 year old boys are masters of stupidity." mom just learned that and has been telling all her 50-60 y/o friends. also both versions in the movie are sung beautifully (and thus hilariously)
the unbelievable fruitiness of hawkeye and trapper at all points but especially in the golf related scenes
trapper spawning the olives out of nowhere. player.placeatme olivejar 1
bring me the sultry bitch with the fire in her eyes! (dramatic zoom)
RADAR STEALING HENRY'S BLOOD??
hawkeye's entire interaction with painless just SCREAMING "chaotic bisexual who's been out the longest of anyone in the friendgroup and will forcefully yank you out of the closet the second you start questioning"
racists do not get dignified with a response. racists get shoved out of their chair
DON'T LET HIM KISS YOU HAWKEYE!
frank getting carted away in a straitjacket and never seen again
margaret hating the idea of football until the general wants it and suddenly she's a cheerleader with pigtails bc she's completely spineless. god she's so evil in this i LOVE horrible evil women. full agency at being the worst person ever <333 i support women's wrongs and i love watching chicks who are just slow-motion car crashes
"i was thinking we should have some plays, cause yknow, football teams always have plays" "actually i took the liberty of drawing about seven or eight plays for us to try ^_^" "great! ...what do these arrows mean?"
MASH EM! SMASH EM! KILL, KILL, KILL!
OH MY GOD THEY SHOT HIM!!!
hawkeye suddenly not wanting to leave once he's actually able to 🥺
end credits being read over the loudspeaker like the other movie night announcements. so. cute.
okay sorry. good movie. i had fun and cried laughing ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐
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Human!Freddy Krueger x Fem!Cheater!Reader || Drabble [Part 2]
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Plot: Do you remember that one I wrote where reader, who had been cheating on her husband (Not with Freddy), was being blackmailed for this by Freddy to try and get rid of Loretta’s body for him before the cops found him?
Well in this one, Freddy inevitably gets caught anyway and just when reader thinks she’s in the clear, he says something in court that turns your whole world upside down and there is not a damn thing you can do about it.
Part One: What The Fuck Now, Freddy!?
Notes:
I’ve been thinking about this since I wrote the last one !! I’m glad to have finally added it ^^ Its shorter, but this is definitely now my favourite thing I have ever written with Freddy so far.
This is a universe I could live in for a while also XD Might make this a series.
Warnings: Its a very overwhelming scene involving lies, cheating, confusion, attention, and hopelessness. If you think that is gonna make you anxious dont read this.
Tags: @gr4veyardg1rl , @kawaistrawberry21 , @lady-love88 , @miss_understood , @spookifi , @thecourtofgraywaves, @yesthetrashbin (Adding these after the fact and hoping no one notices... shh... )
… No. You think, eyes wide, feeling Harrison tense up next to you. He turns his head to look at you and he asks is that true?? a horrible accusatory tone in his voice that you fully deserve - though not for this, - but you can’t respond. You can’t unglue your eyes from Freddy, a million thoughts and feelings flying through you. It feels like your body is shutting down. Like the world just tipped over and everyone but you has glue on their feet.
He just told the whole world, everyone in this courtroom and everyone watching it on TV, that his alibi for all those times that he was ‘supposedly’ killing kids… was his affair with you. That killing Loretta was your idea. So you could be together. That it was premeditated, and you were in on it. And god, you feel sick. You were having an affair after all, not with him but you were, so there’s a lot of time your husband can’t account for… time you were spending with Carter. Time that as far as Harrison is concerned, could have very well been spent with Freddy. So he’s going to believe it. And- Carter- The man you were really with- He’s watching this at home a town over today, and- what is he going to think? That he was one of the many? That you’re some serial cheater? No-
You itch for the phone, to explain to him- what exactly, anyway?? That Freddy made you hide a body with him or he would tell Harrison about him - Carter, - and you?? That you hid a body to hide him away?? That you hid a body???
You can’t possibly explain that. You can’t even stomach it, a week after the fact. The blue and purple marks on Loretta’s neck flash in your mind, and you squeeze your eyes shut for a moment. You swallow down the lump in your throat. You turn to Harrison and put a hand gently on his arm. Parting your lips, you want to explain to him; Tell him that you never touched Freddy, you’re innocent, but- but you’re not… not really. Partly, but… not really.
This is so mixed up.
It wasn’t him, you almost say, but he wrenches himself out of your loose grip- the guilty look on your face enough for him to think that he knows. “Is that why you’re here testifying for him???” He asks, and you want to push forward and explain, make him listen, but you’re starting to become aware of the true state of this courtroom right now. Its loud- people are talking all around you, yelling until your ears turn red and you can clearly hear the blood pumping through your body. They’re all looking at you.
“Is it true???”
“Y/N, how do you respond!?”
“He couldn’t have carried Loretta’s body on his own, oh shit.”
“Y/N!”
“Y/N!”
“Y/- “
Just trying to breath and calm down under this kind of pressure is tricky, and while you’re looking slowly around the room… unable to even speak for yourself from dry mouth… your eyes find Freddy again. He’s the only still thing in the room, like the devil in hell. The only other person who knows the truth about you. Theirs a smirk on his face, eyes deep-set and very steady, like he’s truly enjoying this-- and you want to be sick.
You’re going to want a lawyer, Freddy mouths, a grin on his face and a wink.
You genuinely want to vomit on the floor.
When the cameras start flashing between you and him you have to look away, down at your lap, blinking tears out of your eyes. You’re not sure whether they’re from the bright lights or what’s just been done to you.  
You can imagine the papers tomorrow. ‘Krueger Innocent of Springwood Kids- Crime of Passion Instead!?’ and a big black and white photo of you red faced and shameful in a courtroom pew.
Breathing is becoming hard. You have to get out of here. You need wa-
“Y/N!” Harrison’s voice. That’s Harrisons voice. Your eyes flicker up to him, standing beside you still with a furious and heartbroken look on his face your lips part in a silent cry. You didn’t want to hurt him, this isn’t how it was supposed to go- “Leave! Just- leave!”
Amid all the yelling and the red ears and the flashing and the blurry vision, you don’t have time to consider this, wonder if he still loves you or if he just doesn’t want to look at you, before you’re slipping past him and running out.
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bromcommie · 4 months
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♥️ 👻 💕 for the wrting ask game? hope you're having a good week!
Hi hi, thank you for the ask! Hope you're having a good week as well :) ❤️ What is your favorite line that you’ve written in a fic?
Oh, god. When I reblogged this game I didn't realize how hard it would be, lol. I don't think I can pick a single line overall, but here's a line(s. Okay, it's a tiny paragraph, sue me) that I like from a chapter about Steve and Bucky in Naples during the war I'm reworking atm:
There has to be a kind of solace in this, he thinks, raw. Some kind of reassurance in the fact that there are things ancient here crumbling away slowly, with a quiet surety; not from senseless violence, just time. That amidst the grief, the stubborn memory of a life lovingly lived prevails.
👻 What is your wildest headcanon?
Aw, fuck, I'm blanking on this. I honestly don't even know what constitutes a wild headcanon, haha. Tbh I feel like there's very little that can surprise me anymore coming from the sprawling tapestry that is the Cap fanon, and my HCs usually fall under the "generally accepted" category so. No clue. The first thing that came to mind in terms of canon fix-its is this vague idea I had about Steve attempting to save Natasha when returning the stones but something going horribly wrong and his body and mind being scattered across space and time like the world's trippiest piñata, and him then having to piece himself together with the eventual help of others. That's not necessarily wild nor a HC though, just an interesting challenge and a way for me to be able to live with canon.
(The second, slightly more amusing thing that came to mind is that at some point in the future Bucky absolutely casually starts ~something~ with Steve at like the Brooklyn Public Library—partly because fine, sue him, he's a sappy bastard and moments of quiet joy together get to him, and partly because he's also an asshole and a riled up embarrassed Steve also gets to him. Which again is not wild at all, just based on the very real life experience of, well. Hearing people fucking at the Brooklyn Public Library, lol.) 💕 What is your favorite fic that you’ve written?
My knee-jerk response in terms of prose has to be it's never over (hey, orpheus). Even though I've posted so little of it so far I've been writing it on and off for about 2 years now, it's spawned the two other standalones I've posted, and it's my baby. A baby I am stuck on, constantly banging my head over and changing my mind about every two days as my writing has changed a bit since I started it way back when, but still my baby nonetheless.
But realistically, the work that I actually like the best is the beloved name, exiled. I don't know if that's cheating since it's not exactly prose and has zero functional plot, but it's the only fandom related thing I've ever written so quickly and in such an inspired fury, and I'm actually proud of it still.
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tsuki-sennin · 1 year
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"ppl who celebrate character birthdays are annoying pass it on"
FUCK this post, and Happy Birthday Neon Kurama~! ...right, so you know it's all gonna go horribly wrong, but she's our friend! We support her!
Spoilers, I guess...
-What a massive L the Jyamato have taken.
-Garden Grandpa has become Construction Grandpa!
-OOOOOOOH
-Oh hey Daichi. Just sorta hangin' around, huh?
-I don't blame you tbh, I'd be sitting on my ass too.
-April 4th! That's two days from now!
-:)
-Happy Basuday~!
-...:(
-They kidnapped the poor girl on her birthday.
-"What do you even get the Celebrity 'It' Girl who has everything? ...aside from loving parents, treatment like a normal human being, a boyfriend who isn't over twice her age, and a break from creepy weirdos on the internet?"
-...three, five, and seven, huh?
-Keiwa's just totally numb to all of Ace's... Ace-iness.
-Toro, toro!
-It's a Toreador! Just like the ones referenced in that indie horror game from 2014! Octodad: Dadliest Catch!
-...is this just the Seito/Touto proxy battle arena from Build? I think it is, at least, I'm probably wrong.
-Beroba continues to Bull-y Michinaga for her entertainment.
-Fight!
-I swear, by my sword and capote, that I will once again prove victorious!
-Bullfight!
-Rook! Bishop! Buffa! All the most powerful chess pieces!
-Shut the fuck up Chirami, you ain't doing shit.
-"Happy Birthday :)"
-Na-Go Stans are wildin'
-We win, we party!
-Hot damn, Keiwa!
-Oooooh, disarming yourself for a shot? Clever.
-Oh, whoops! Bero be cheatin', who coulda guessed!
-"You cheated. You didn't learn, you didn't improve."
-Oh God, Beroba's gonna leak her DMs.
-Gotta win!
-Oh hello, Kyuun.
-"A present! For me~?"
-"No! >:( ...Maybe :("
-You're so full of crap, man.
-Free Boost~!
-Sweet and salty! Just like sea-salt ice cream!
-Word of advice lads, be honest.
-OH FUCK, IT'S DAD
-...I think I forgot his name, I'm just gonna call him Papa Naoto until I remember it.
-You're only like... marginally better a parent than your wife, man. And that's only because you don't hit her or constantly try restraining her.
-...man, I just realized, Neon suffers trauma from being kidnapped at a young age and her mother just... holds her captive. Irony at its most fucked up.
-To be quite honest, I don't think Kyuun'd be much better company than Jeff Pesos or whoever Izumi had in mind.
-Man, these supporter plotlines are so interesting, holy shit.
-Ah, yep. There's Ace. Looking into it.
-"Geats. How unexpected."
-...Waaaait...
-"I've had quite enough of family matters from last season, thank you very much."
-KOUSEI, THAT'S HIS NAME
-Ace, you don't just walk up to a girl and lay her backstory out like that.
-I'll give Kousei credit, he at least seems legitimately worried.
-Doesn't even seem to have a scratch on her. Seems a little at odds with the depiction of the kidnapping itself, huh?
-Man... Can't even cake.
-Time for the mountain lion to descend upon the bull.
-...shit, that was lame. Pretend you never noticed that.
-OH?
-Okay, it's Ace time!
-Beroba's such a scrublord. Or uh... scrublady, as the case may be.
-Ooooooh, boy!
-Set!
-Dual On! Ninja! Magnum!
-Ready, Fight!
-Get splashed, idiot!
-"Two, huh?"
-Set!
-Ooooooh, he's not going into Laser Boost, okay!
-That's neat! They kept that suit around!
-PNGTuber Beroba.
-Ohhhhhh noooo
-You're an absolutely horrendous excuse of human being, Beroba.
-Great job Takahashi, banger villain. Especially you Namika-san, you're putting in a fantastic performance <3
-Ohhh, Ace is MAD mad.
-Everybody loves Na-Go-san!
-...holy shit, that is so cruel. They just
-Instantly went on a targeted harassment campaign.
-AKARI?
-Ohhhh
-...that's
-That's depressing as fuck.
-...that goes a long way to explain why Izumi was so controlling and Kousei dumped all his money into... I'm gonna be completely honest, what's basically a snuff film ring.
-Why would he let Giroli pick Neon to play then?
-"She was lying" SHUT THE FUCK UP
-Completely ruined my homegirl's life.
-Fucking MURDER that thing, Ace.
-Oh shit, Kyuun! My dude!
-Next episode.
-#NaGoSweep!
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bobs-secret-blog · 2 years
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Lost hope
Giyu x reader
Authores note:first fic on tumblr and its angst. Sorry but im in the mood, hope you enyoy reading tho. Love ya ●>●
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A nurses life was at times a stressful one. Patients were at times horrible and sometimes times you had to take care of absolute perverts. But it all paid off at the end of the day. Because you could see your soon to be husband again!
His name was Yuka Imalai, he was a doctor at the small villiage hospital you worked at. He taught you everything you know. You had been dating for 2 years now and you were happy. Everything was going great between you two. Your wedding was in 2 weeks. You had planed everything from the cake to the guest lists. And you were going to have a great honeymoon.
But right now Yuka was having a code red surgery on two patients. One in a critical condition and on the blink of death, the other lost an arm. Yuka was stressed as all hell but adventualy mannaged to pull it off with them.
It was 2 days after the operation.Yuka instructed you to do some minor check ups and blood work while he gets to another surgery.
So with no time to waist you went into the first patients room, his chest was covered in bandages along with his arms and whole neck. You picked up his chart from the table.
Sanemi Shinazugawa.
Huh. Sounded almost familiar. Maybe an ex-patient perhaps? Oh weel. Whatever it was could wait after the whole checkup. So you had begun to take some blood samples, cleaning wounds and changing bandages. Finaly done.
You werw heading to the second patients room just down the hall, suprised to see he was awake. He had short black hair, ocean blue eyes. One arm was missing while the other was bandaged. He just looked at the ground the whole time. Looking so woried and deppressed. How sad. Walking over to the table you picked up a paper.
"Giyu Tomioka?"
He looked at you, eyes widening with shock. Oh man what did you do this time. He slowly says
"(Y/n) ? Is it realy you? Oh god please tell me i finaly found you again!!! Please ill never let you down again! Im sorry about Kocho , i promise"
Oh wow he must have been brain damaged.
"Sir please calm down, your going to hurt yourself again. Plus i realy dont know you sir."
Thats the moment the tears broke down. A anguishing, grief filled scream erupted from him and waterfalls from his eyes. It hurt so bad. Having been scared by his actions you quickly left the room asking a different nurse to help. She had finished up with Giyu an hour later, and let me tell you he was a menace. Franticaly trashing around and asking for only you for him. It was whatever for you, but not for Giyu. Even if you dont remember him, he remembers you.
It was two years back when he was 19, he married you when he was very young at 17. Oh how naive you were to think he could be loyal. But at first everything went great, you were the awesome couple everyone dreamed to be. Everybody was jealous of your love towards each other, even some of the demon slayers. You were as happy as you could be, spending free days with your husband. Going on vacations with him, cooking together, planning your future, talking about children for the future. Everything was perfect....
Until Giyu started acting weird.
He was rarely home for dinners, didnt take the bentos you made him. He didnt even want to sleep with you in your bed anymore. It started to be suspicious towards you, so you came up with a conclusion. He was cheating on you.
You thought you were crazy at frist, a mad woman thinking her husband who kills demons for a job is being unloyay to her? Yeah thats it. You were done with his bullshit after a couple of months. Wanting to just go away from him and be happy again like you were at the start of your marriage. You wanted the divorce. And oh yes,
you fucking got it.
One night at 12pm when you were on the verge of tears, waiting for Giyu to come home. He wasnt even on a mission, so where was he ? Just as you began to lose hope the door to your house had slammed open. Revealing a messy haired Giyu. His cheeks pink and blushy. Buttons of his uniform unbuttoned at the top. "Where were you Giyu?"
"Out on a patrol, saving people (Y/n). Cant you ever get that through your thick skull?"
" Dont lie to me Giyu, you didnt have patrols tonight. You were with someone. Just please. Tell me who it is so i can let it go." He didnt even fucking look at you while you were talking.
"Giyu just fucking tell m-"
"It was Kocho god dammit! It was always her! From the first day that i met her i feel in love! I love her more than i will ever love you, she is more perfect in so many ways! I love HER !"
You knew it. It was always her, how could you be so blind all this time?
With one final look at him, you grabbed your bags and headed ot to live with your family. Only until you got back onto your feet and started working somewhere.
Your mama and papa were super supportive along with ypur brother Eiji and big sisters Fumiko and Rina. You found a job as a nurse in a small hospital. And there you met Yuka, he was everything you had ever wanted from a partner. But the most important thing was that you were happy.
Unlike Giyu. Kocho made his life a living hell. Bullying him to such agony, he was happy she died earlyer than him. He cried his heart out. Hoping that maybe one day he will meet you. Adventualy he did, in the hospital. But to what? You didnt remember him.
He cried all night. Wanting to see you again after a week, only to be told you had gone away.
It has now been 3 yeears since you married Yuka and you were very happy. You had twins now! You decided to name them Hiroki and Tsuneo. Both boys having looks on their mother. Only having their fathers strange orange eyes.
As for Giyu, he was still searching for you. He spent all he had on his travels. Including the once precious sword he fought battles with. After some time he had stoped. Lost all hope. Now laying at the back of his house next to the bedroom window. The same one you used to sing through in the morning. In the house you both used to live in, and the house you left.
And there he laid on the grass, blood preciously pouring out of his body. Ravens pecking his skin here and there, blood starting to dry up. Maybe he didnt feel happy in the real world, but here in the afterlife he is widely smilling. Beacause he is here with you, thats all he had. And thats all he will ever get for now. Still hoping that he will find you in another life. Where you will be happy and free of troubles.
But for now this happiness will have to do, until you come back to him again.
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vi-sigoth · 10 months
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if its not too personal, related to your rb on that marriage post, how did you get over being used up by your first relationship and eventually remarry? most women in your situation would either become much more feministic or whatever, and completely or mostly relinquish any thought of traditional living or "roles", or they would harden and never marry or enter a serious relationship again.
So, that relationship I was talking about—he was just my long-term boyfriend, we never married (thank fucking god, what a disaster that would have been, I’m so glad I didn’t get what I thought I wanted at the time).
But I’m very sad to say that I unfortunately did become “feministic” and very, very bitter. But I never gave into it entirely, and I never entirely gave up hope. When I was with my ex, we’ll call him “first ex” I started to hate men. I hated men, I didn’t trust them, I thought that all men were stupid and violent, and all men were liars, cheaters, and were not really capable of any form of love that I recognized. And if that sounds like a very sad way to live, it’s because it was. And SO MANY men and women think like this about the opposite sex. It’s just so devastating to me.
My parents are still married, but their relationship is very strange and rocky. I got with another guy shorty after First Ex. Now understand, First Ex, on paper, was actually pretty compatible with me. He was very based and racist, had similar religious views to me, and had similar moral, political and philosophical views. He was a lot older than me, which is what I thought I liked and what I wanted at the time.
But for all his claims about believing this and that, he didn’t live up to any of his views. Women were all untrustworthy whores to him, and he had cheated on every single girlfriend or wife he had ever had in his adult life, and was a porn addict. (Which is why, fellas and girlies, please thoroughly vet that cool “”””based”””” Tumblr trad person you’re thinking about e-dating. There are some people in the world who are very, very good at posturing) Second Ex was an on again off again thing for the next couple of years, and he was a degenerate leftist. Every single cringe leftist view you can name, he believed it. At the time, I lived in a section of a city that was very artsy, so I was surrounded by similar degenerate leftist men who were hitting on me all the time. Some of them were married or had girlfriends.
So given all of this, can you see why I hated men? I mean I hated men so, so, so, much.
But I never stopped believing that I would find a man who would loved me as much as I loved him, who would be my other half, who shared my views and values and who wanted to have me as a wife and mother to his children. I never stopped carrying that hope in my heart, even when I was lonely, single, and surrounded by losers. And that’s the other thing, the really difficult thing. Who dated a guy that pretended to be trad and based but actually wasn’t? Who then bounced almost immediately to a weaselly leftist cuck? Who surrounded themself with leftist urbanite male and female artists and academics?
Me. I did this to myself. I constantly accepted behavior I hated and disagreed with. I constantly bit my tongue while people around me agreed with things and behaved in ways I found disgusting and reprehensible because I was a weak coward that was afraid of making trouble or stirring the pot or standing up for what I believed in. I love my dad. He’s a dick. But do love him, and I owe part of the fact that I knew to eventually accept responsibility for my own behavior because I had a mother and a father that always tried to instill in me to not blame others for my problems and not have a victim mentality in my life. I had to accept that the reason I had this poisonous mindset, and that I was in my late 20s and still unmarried was about 95 percent my own doing.
It doesn’t excuse any of the horrible things my two ex boyfriends did to me, they were both uniquely awful people. But taking responsibility for my fuck ups, which was not an easy thing to do, because I REALLY fucked up my early 20s in so many ways, and recognizing that I needed to surround myself with better people is what led me to having friends that actually enrich my life and make it better, and not hating men so much led me to being open to men hitting on me (obviously, it didn’t mean I had to give them the time of day, just that I didn’t have to be so rude and aggressive like I used to be) and opening up my heart just a little bit is how I met my husband
I think that young people need to do this. You see men and women going the same, but opposite way. “All the women in this club are such whores! 😤” brother, what are you doing looking for a wife in a nightclub? “All men are trash!” Well sis, you aren’t generally going to find a good dude in your OnlyFans DMs. There’s a lot more to say about this, but really—for me, taking responsibility for my own actions and getting away from shit people is how I didn’t fall into the liberal feminist pit of despair.
And another thing? I realized that birth control is poison and I threw it in the trash one beautiful day in the early spring of 2020.
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kingflups · 7 months
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🍅 🍦 🔪 🍄 for writers truth or dare pretty please!
🍄 ⇢ share a head canon for one of your favourite ships or pairings
For Leon and Luis (Resident Evil)! Who else is it going to be, I haven't had much else inspiration beside those two lately lol
Luis never got his drivers license. Or rather, not techniquely. Growing up where he did, in rural don't-believe-in-modern-technology Valdelobos, who was going to teach him? Once he got to college, he could either walk or take the bus. Sure, he had friends teach him how to drive, and Sure, him and some other children were taught how to drive farm trucks at maybe too young an age (because prior to the cult taking over, they had to get supplies sometimes) but Luis never learned legally.
When he was on the run, he was very careful to never break any road laws.
In AU's where Luis lives, he moves to the states and when they set up an ID for him, they ask if Luis knows how to drive. He says yes. It's not his fault no one asked any details. So he drives around even though he never actually took a drivers class or passed any test.
And he would never, ever, ever tell Leon. Leon wanted to be a cop. I don't think there are a lot of things Leon would loose his cool over, but this is one of them. Driver's classes are literally there to protect other people from crashing in a metally, horrible death. And Leon, who's primary character trait is literally wanting to protect people, would loose his mind. It doesn't matter Luis is the just the most careful driver that's ever been. Its the principle.
Along the same lines as Leon wanting to be a cop, people head canoning Leon as a stoner makes me laugh. I think it's because they look at older versions of him and assume personality wise he smokes (which is still fun, btw).
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But look at this baby. Resident evil 2 Leon has never broken a law in his life. This guy still thinks weed is a hard drug. He would leave a party if people were drinking underage. I don't care if he was only a cop for one day before that illusion got shattered, he doesn't touch a joint until he's at least 25. (You can convince me RE4 Leon smokes though)
🔪 ⇢ what's the weirdest topic you researched for a writing project?
Back when I was actively writing my gravity falls fic monster falls, I had a wonderful idea to have a chapter set in town. I thought it would be cool if I had readers send me their OC's to fill up the background. I will. NEVER. do that again. It was fun, but that fic was so popular I got so many submissions and so many monsters I had to research to describe properly, because god FORBID I not research every monster people sent into me. Werewolves and shark mermaids were easy. But some of you..... some of you beasts (said with love) sent me the most obscure fucking folklore. To this day I know one of them had to be from an anime I still don't know
People who just sent me there fursonas and called them were-whatever animal still make me smile
🍦 ⇢ name three good things about a character you hate
God damn you. Fuck. Okay. I don't usually hate characters (dislike? yes, but they usually fit well in their world so I don't hate them) so I had to dig into the recessive of my brain for this one.
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This is Sentinel Prime from transformers Animated. I haven't watched this show in probably... ten years? But I fucking hate him. Seethingly so. I got angry writing this. I hate him.
Great antagonist. Show sets him up as an annoying glory hound and makes the audience believe he will likely be due down the line for a redemption. Instead, his power hunger drives leads him into becoming a literal dictator being puppeted by the actual primary villian of the show. Don't be fooled- Sentinel is just as much a powerful antagonist in his own right. In my opinion, part of the reason Transformers Animated is remembered so fondly is because characters like Sentinel starting as irritating but almost allies. The irritating tendency to lie and cheat is treated as a character flaw and nothing more, and it ends being the very thing that throws their planet back into all out war.
Consistent. In a flash back, Sentinel ditches series protagonist Optimus and charcter Elita in the mines when they get attacked. Upon finding out Elita survived, albeit disfigured, instead of being relieved, Sentinel calls her gross to her face, even though his actions (or disactions, really) are what left her that way. For a second I thought this was going to be his moment of self reflection, but it absolutely was not. He's so buried into believing his own false retelling of the past he doesn't comprehend any of this as his own fault (at least, not out loud). And honestly, it's a great move. The writers really commit to the fact the Sentinel makes up his own truth, and once he does, he does not relent.
A very fitting critique for military nepotism babies? This was something that I didn't fully grasp as a kid, but as an adult looking back, the animated team really did a great job on Sentinel. He rose through the ranks through nepotism, making others take the fall for his mistakes, and funding war criminals to move him ahead; and it worked. The series was sadly cut short before their final season due to licensing issues, I would have loved to see the end of Sentinel's arc.
🍅 ⇢ give yourself some constructive criticism on your own writing
To start using an outline and then actually use the outline. But I should be realistic here. I think I would benefit from shorter piece lengths. I feel like I focus so much on the actions I want characters to take that I miss out on the opportunities to really describe feelings, environments.... sometimes, things just feel flat. My personal goal this year is to focus more on descriptive language and not just direction. Maybe now that I wrote that down I'll hold myself to it...?
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pandythoughts · 9 months
Text
my relationship with addiction is a rollercoaster that I can't wait to get off of
the worst part about self-destruction is how intimate that relationship with yourself becomes. you become so bonded with your addiction and illness that leaving it behind feels so unfamiliar. you feel lost without that part of you. without that connection to yourself. although, that connection isn't true love. its manipulative, evil, and sucks the life out of you. it's one of the most narcissistic relationships you'll ever experience and what really sucks about it, is that it's with yourself. growing and healing from that relationship with yourself will be one of the most unbearable yet gratifying feelings you will endure on this journey of finding the true love and respect you have for yourself. some days you'll sit pondering the idea of "just one drink won't hurt me." which wouldn't hurt, but you're the kind of person who's an addict, so unfortunately, it will hurt. it will end up hurting you more than you can even anticipate in that moment because that part of you, that you think loves you so deeply, is manipulating you into ruining you, because that part of you feels like you deserve nothing better. that part of you wants to force you to believe that you are so unworthy of truly loving yourself for who you really are. that part of you wants you to think that without substance, you're not funny, you're not clever, beautiful, cool, intelligent, and that part of you will hold such a tight grip on you that you'll actually start to believe it. then there you are. a half gallon of vodka, 2 grams of cocaine, and three days later, feeling like the scum of the earth because eventually you have to snap back to reality. that part of you that you thinks loves you so much, will leave for a while. leave you to deal with the shame, guilt, and pain. all alone. then finally when you've sat there with all the horrible feelings and thoughts you've been dealing with, that really make you want to leave behind the life you think is so fun and cool, that part of you that you think loves you so much, comes back and convinces you that this is as good as it will ever get. the vicious cycle continues, and you keep getting further away from what you deserve. when I tell you that addiction is the most toxic relationship to ever exist, I'm not fucking kidding. I really envy the people who never have gone through this. its excruciating, exhausting, just all-around fucking depressing and takes so much fucking strength to let go of that version of their self. so much god damn will power.
you're ruining your actual meaningful relationships in life. you find yourself fighting with your boyfriend because respectfully he doesn't want a girlfriend who's an addict. so, you tell him you'll stop because you don't want to lose him. you love him and can't imagine being without him, but that super narcissistic relationship with yourself is by far more intimate, well, at least that's what it has convinced you. now you find yourself hiding the truth from him. you're partying several times a week and getting so much more intimate with the shittiest version of yourself. on the verge of losing the relationship with the person who truly loves, respects, and wants the best for you. how fucking tragic right? that's how truly brutal addiction is. after telling my boyfriend I'd stop over and over again, he told me that he felt like i was cheating on him with drugs and alcohol. i absolutely was. the idea of getting fucked up always sounded way cooler than staying in on a Friday night watching movies with him. don't get me wrong, I love him, but just not as much as i love the self-sabotaging side of myself. this side of me is chaotic, impulsive, careless, and free. this side comes and goes though. this part of myself ups and leaves when the party's over. one person who never leaves no matter what, is him. even when I'm giving all my attention to the side of me that doesn't even serve me. so why do I choose this fucked up relationship that i have with the shittiest version of myself? because that's how twisted addiction is. I've been an addict for 14 years. I've been in this horrific relationship with addiction for 14 fucking years and all its done is gotten shittier.
I'm exhausted. it's a roller coaster ride. the emotions i experience as an addict have ripped me to shreds. chewed me up and spit me out. grabbed me by my hair and threw me against a wall. the most abusive and evil relationship I'll ever know. I'm so ready to let go and never look back. finding the strength will be the hardest part. I'm so wrapped around the fingers of the addict side of me, but you eventually have to be so fed up with your own bullshit and you have to let it go. I've been clean for nearly a week now. with the new year approaching I'm not exactly confident I can hold on to my sobriety, but I'm confident that this new year I'll be able to break it off. I'll build a new relationship with the version of myself that has so much unconditional love and respect for me. so much self-work is in the future and I believe in my potential.
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bubsub69 · 1 year
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Entry 2
14/05/2023 22:47
Well might as well start all entries with how my sleep schedule is, i had an afternoon nap so i might not sleep enough tonight but better than being up at 4am because i tried going to sleep at like 11pm and it went horribly wrong.
Reason for writing today? well while before looking at cute couple stuff like hugging and cuddling would make me cry now a porn video that wasnt even my first time watching made me cry because the couple seemed really happy and having a good time even though the girl was probably laughing cause she ruined the dudes orgasm on his face (video: https://www.redgifs.com/watch/quaintelderlyvireo#rel=tag%3Aruined-orgasm%2Cchastity%2Ca;order=trending)
I guess i should start with yesterday, with the blessing of the folders/briefcases whatever, it was as bad as expected so at least not worse than expectations, a very late start as a lot of people expected followed by a walk a queue to sit down, a small sermon and then speeches from each course. The worst part honestly might have just been the sun, it was blazing hot and i think i got sick from it, my nose was extremely fucked last night and still kinda is. After that we went to have lunch at a crisp 3pm and the food arrived at like 4, thank god my body has a high hunger resistance or i mightve killed someone, i spent a lot of time at the restaurant but at least i got to be with my cousin so it was actually pleasant, at the end we went to the lake garden to take some pictures for some reason and then went home (the for some reason comes from the fact we already had like 40 photos on the camera alone and went to take more).
idk why i wanted to write down what happened yesterday this was supposed to be more about emotions than story but oh well who can stop an autist from rambling.
But going to aforementioned (wow that was the word whos spelling i really had to look up, why am i spellchecking a personal diary? cause fuck you i want to, anyway another autistic rambling aside) emotions, those ribbons made me feel kinda weird when i reread them cause everyone was saying congrats on the hard work and for beating this challenge but i feel like its undeserved cause its not like i put a huge amount of effort studying, i barely passed some stuff which is definetly something im not proud of but yeah i feel like i slacked off most of the year even though ive never missed classes or failed to deliver a project, i guess im just associated with the studying part of school instead of this which is better honestly, even if i get stressed like now where i have a shit ton of stuff to do and am over procastinating as usual, but yeah, a lot of good jobs for a meh performance feels kinda weird.
But enough about school heres an update on D, today is sunday which matches the same day as the day of the call so how was her availability? well she gave me a maybe and then said that apparently her visa is expiring and shes super stressed out, well that seems like something way too complex for an excuse/lie so i believe her more but yeah her moving again is definetely going to make her busy again so i guess no calls for me.
Really feeling like a piece of shit that thats all the care i can muster for it, shes like about to get formally deported and im out here complaining shes too busy for me, and the worst is i decided to get a keyholder on chaster just to satisfy me, it feels like cheating i dont know why, we had some mild texting and a call and ive already like fallen in love and feel like a traitor, but i guess im tired of waiting and it might be for the best to move on if she just wants to stay an acquaintance (well new record for biggest spelling blunder), but yeah i feel like im giving up too soon cause i really liked her and just moving on feels really bad but what can i do when she doesnt show any interest, i mean not only does she not text back she also hasnt asked anything about me, which i guess is kinda fair for most boring person in the world whos hobbies are gaming and youtube, yippy, i guess ill wait again, this time im gonna do a week of no texting to see if she ever sends me something, she will be busy with the moving so she probably wont but oh well whatcha gonna do, not like shed say yes to a call in these circumstances either, i still wish i could help her but i dont think i can just ask dad if he has a contact with the visa man to hurry her process, but i did imagine that cenario
I guess switching to a different type of emotion to put some variety in this yesterday i fucked up the gamepads usb port out of anger but i think i tricked my parents by saying i saved the computer from falling, and on other hardware problem news theres a screw that i think broke the plastic around it so know the case keeps disconnecting from the rest. This was a shitty story but at least its not all about being sad and lonely
Well a bit of a blunder of an ending but oh well heres entry two, if the lady i messaged to be my keyholder replies the update will be here:
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depresseddepot · 2 years
Text
Okay im adding the rest of my glory liveblogging under the cut so i don't have to keep making more posts lol
God everyone in this show is so fucked up. Yeon jin kissing jae jun SECONDS after he strangled her and also jae jun showing up to father day (or whatever its called, idk i never had those) with do yeong RIGHT THERE AUGSHSJJAJA don't listen to them do yeong i would treat you and your money right
do yeong clearly getting pissed abt the way jae jun talks about dong eun IS SO HOT AND STUPID honey you are an old married man with a 1st grader, is now really the time to be getting jealous about your one sided emotional affair. but also its hot. (whats that phrase? hate to see you go but love to watch you walk away? idk i think this is improper usage) this is now the second "hot old sad married business man that was cheated on but also had his own emotional affair BEFORE he realized he was being cheated on" on my list of rotating men
god GOD WAIT the way all of her bullies are swearing "ill do anything you say. i swear ill follow you until you die" THE METAPHORS. THE METAPHORS OUGHGGHHG
DO YEONG PLAYING VERY LOUD CLASSICAL MUSIC IN HIS CAR SO THAT HIS DAUGHTER DOESN'T HERE HIM CONFRONT JAE JUN. HQGSJSJSJJSS ALL OF THE MEN IN THIS SHOW ARE DIFFERENT KINDS OF FUCKED UP
soft spoken carefully dressed married businessmen aggressively confronting the people bothering their emotional affair-ees (GOD MY TYPE IS SO WEIRD AND UNOBTAINABLE AHGSHZJAKNAS)
nothing and i mean NOTHING will outweigh the fucking ECSTASY i felt watching park dong hoon beat threaten and beat the shit out of that loan shark in my mister. ive got goosebumps just THINKING ABT IT AAAAAAA
sorry my edible just kicked in
do yeong please. i am begging you. just one chance just ONE
man this show is fucked up. the way jae jun doesn't seem like a terrible awful person at first bc you don't see him physical abuse dong eun but then you watch his character reveal more and more how fucked up he really is and it just shows how men like that never really grow out of it unless they're fucking called out on it
Oh dong eun. honey i am holding you (a woman capable of murder) so gently in my hands. they're all fucked up but jae jun and yeon jin in particular and the way they look at you (the camera) hits a little too close to home
God it is so hard to type under the influence i get so stupidly dizzy
i wonder if do yeong is going to be angrier with dong eun for using him or his wife for lying and cheating? Bc every time I think he's clearly over dong eun he says something that makes me think he intends to defend her or something
noooooo old man stay loyal to your emotional affair 🤡
I CAN BARELY TYPE THIS IK SO EXCITED. YEO JEONG AND DO YEONG IN THE SAME ROOM. EVIL DOCTOR MEETS SAD LONELY BUSINESSMAN
"you need to get up close and personal so you feel it as you go in" i have been so horribly obsessed with love for so long that my taste in men has soured. what is it about these crazy dangerous MANIACS THAT HAS ME SO PUFFED UP. KÖNIG AND GHOST AND NOW YEO JEONG. god the barely contained unhinged violence in his eyes. also is his meeting w do yeong genuinely like an accident??
oh my god. oh my god. YEO JEONG HAS SEEN DONG EUNS ROOM WITH ALL THE PICTYRESWTAPED TO THE WALL AND HE WAS LIKE "yeah okay. secretly i like this and also sure lets have casual domestic hang outs while we talk about damning the people from your past"
THE MEETING WAS ORCHESTRATED. HE'S PLAYING HIS PART AS A PAWN SO EAGERLY "i was annoyed he was cooler than me" sorry. id like to be sandwiched inbetween you two and also dong eun
do yeong is so easily convinced when a pretty slightly dangerous woman looks threateningly in his eyes without wavering AT ALL
yeo jeong, uncomfortable at the sudden mention of illegal violet child abuse: so. uh. how frequently do you wash your sheets
HAGAJJSJABABA ALSO YEO JEONG after being prompted abt his murdery daydreams from a girl planning on being a murderer (i assume): um. can i persuade you to ask me something else?
Also dong eun the whole show is like " 👁👁 "
IM SORRY. THE MAN WHO MURDERED YEO JEONGS DAD WROTE HIM LETTERS DESCRIBING THE MURDER FOR LITERALLY THAT WHOLE TIME
"so your poor son went to hell after all, huh?"
WAIT DONG EUN IS TRIGGERED BY THE SOUND OF SIZZLING AND THAT SOUND RELAXES YEO JEONG. THE METAPHORSSSS
dong eun living literally across the street from yeon jin will also never not be funny
YEON JIN FINDING DONG EUNS ROOM WHILE THE HEAVY METAL PLAYS. YESSSSSS
OH LORD THE HEAVY METAL WHILE YEO JEONG WALKS THREATINGLY INTO A MORGUE. GOD HELP ME. THE GLOVES. also something about a doctor being in the hospital they work at in casual clothes. hot
yeo jeong i would die for you. and i think you would end up being the cause
DO YEONG IN DONG EUNS BEDROOM?????? Oh the parallels
IS THAT THE ENDING
THATS IT????????????????????????????? NO BABY I NEED MORE RIGHT NOW
part 2 coming march 2023. O have to stay alive until march 2023
NOOOOOO IT CAN'T BE OVER I WAS JUST GETTING SO FUCKING EXCITED
noooooo NOOOOO ugh. god damn it how am i supposed to know if do yeong is there to confront his wife or if he's there to protect her!!!!!! NOOO I NEED TO KNOW HOW MURDERY YEO JEONG IS
Edit literally 2 hours later: bro I CANNOT stop thinking about yeo jeong. I have a huge fucking problem. whats that post thats category 5 autism event or something bc i am going through it
I NEED MORE. I NEED MORE RIGHT NOW
something about yeo jeong drives me fucking crazy bro i cant stop thinking about the scene with him gently skimming his fingertips over his scalpels as they slowly get bigger and turn into knives of more and more lethality
The way he described stabbing someone to do yeong. good god these insane men are making ME INSANE TOO
god. christ. i can't handle it. hes so sweet looking but the way the actor immediately shifts into the dead eyed dangerous side of him was so masterfully done
oughghhhh i have to rewatch it RIGHT NOW OR ILL DIE I THINK
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fairykery · 2 years
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Oh God I forgot how horrible of a ship de-lena was.
-only loving her simply because she is an exact copy of the woman he was looking for for over a hundred years. And only coming back to her because the original wasn't as easy to manipulate.
-only communicating with her through sex and constantly insulting her and her person.(never once liked anything about her true heart and instead always only complimented her looks)
-constantly sexually molesting her when she not a fucking mindless mannequin(not to mention the amount of times he doesn't treat her as a person but a doll he must protect at all cost)
-knowing shes in a relationship with his brother constantly trying to get her to leave him.
-Killing her brother to punish her for for rejecting him, despite how fucking broken she already was for losing people
-Constantly threatening to kill/abuse her friends(and brother)even tho he was already one of the "gOod oNeS"
-killing behind her back and never once mentioning it. (He did this shit WITH his humanity ON, and it wasn't fried/off like Stefan's/other characters so he doesn't get a pass)
-initially not wanting to severe the sire bond because she sees him up this way(intending on making her a mindless sex slave)
-not wanting to rescue the brother that sacrificed so much for him, just cuz he was worried Elena might still love him and they might be each other soulmates.
-not being able to tell when another is pretending to be her(once again proving how he only cares about the physical appearance)
-elena becoming a psychotic lunatic when it came to losing Damon, not caring if she lost her friends
-elena cheating
-elena telling Caroline to stfu about her dating her rapist/abuser (don't even get me started on the fact that the show made her forgive him instead of coming up with some "he had his humanity off" plotline or something)
-elena becoming, a dumber more annoying, and narcissistic version of herself
-damon constantly trying to change Elena into Him and Elena constantly trying to change Damon into her.
-Their off and on relationship
-Elena constantly defending the toxic traits of Damon no matter who gets hurt.
-damon telling Elena that he doesn't like when she defends him because he loses track of what's right or wrong
-them being together despite continuously admitting how wrong they are for each other
-him not wanting to give her the cure for his selfish desires
-ITS ALWAYS ABOUT SEX
-ALL THEIR ROMANTIC SCENES ARE CRINGEY AF. BECAUSE THEY ARE FORCED. IT SO OBVIOUS THEY ARE TRYING TO BE STELENA SO HARD. IT NOT CUTE. ITS JUST VOMIT INDUCING.
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taestefully-in-luv · 3 years
Text
Always You | JJK (Seven)
Summary: you and Jungkook have been best friends since freshmen year of college, there’s a lot of unsaid feelings and tension but neither make a move. what happens when his friend Taehyung (also your crush) needs a fake girlfriend?
Pairing: Jungkook x Female reader
Genre: friends to lovers, idiots to lovers, slight slow burn, roommate au, college au, SMUT (starting ch2), fluff, angst (in later chapters) slight crack, lots of drama
Word Count: 10.1k
Warnings: Swearing, alcohol consumption, sexual tension (!!!), mention of erection, heated make out, marking, grinding, mentions of suicide:( (If this makes you uncomfortable pls skip), mentions of cheating, quick blowjob, swallowing,
Notes: sorry this chapter is shorter than the last! But we only have 2 chapters left guys! And they are long!!! Sorry in advance lol. Hope you guys enjoy this chapter:) Anyway feel free to send an ask if you want to be added to the taglist or just want to chat about the story:)
Taglist: @mooniyooni @thisartemisnevermisses @giadalin @kookiebunny097 @cosmosjk @moonchild1 @just-jeon @anpanman-sonyeondan @starlight-night0 @yessii-i @apollukee @mikasaredscarf1 @kaye-rosales @bunnyjeonjk @dyriddle @seagulljk @hass-mich-los @peachy-skz0325 @wonusbitch @not-your-lion @flowersgirl02 @justinetingball @fiantomartell
© taestefully-in-luv
Previous
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Jungkook runs his finger through your hair, his mouth hot on your neck as he leaves behind what feels like a million, slow kisses. You taste sweet and he’s reminded of the first time he got to do this with you and his heart swells at the memory. He feels you grind against him, making him impossibly harder as he grinds back. Your moans fill his ears and it sounds like a chorus of sweet, sweet music to him, he can’t help but grin into his kisses. Suddenly, the image of him kissing down your throat becomes blurry and the sound of your whines echo in the distance. He must be waking up.
Jungkook feels you hovering over him with shocked eyes and he can’t help but wonder what’s gotten into you. He can feel his head beginning to throb from the inevitable hang over that wishes to visit and he raises a hand over it. You continue to look down at him and that’s when he notices it. Them. The hickeys that spread across your skin and he goes absolutely pale.
He looks back at you with wide eyes but he can’t help but feel pride bloom all throughout his body as he looks at how he has marked you but those petals quickly shrivel up when he realizes how badly he must have messed up.
“Oh fuck.” He says under his breath.
“Yeah. ‘Oh fuck’” you repeat back.
Jungkook lifts himself up, leaning on his arms as he takes another look at the bruises that cover your skin. He releases a shaky breath contemplating what to say.
“Drunk.” His eyes slide to the side, “We were really…drunk.”
You narrow your eyes for a split second then look at him with ease,
“Yeah…right…drunk.” You quickly agree.
Jungkook and you share a moment of a silence, admiring one another’s work on the other. You hesitantly reach out, your fingers coming in contact with the side of his neck, brushing against his soft skin.
“This ones huge…I’m sorry.” You say, not sounding entirely sorry. A slight smirk graces your features.
“Ha, you don’t look very sorry.” Jungkook grabs a hold of your hand, “Plus, you don’t even want to see what I did to you.”
You retreat your hand back to touch your own skin, you shuffle out of the sheets and stand from the bed. You walk towards the little mirror over by Jungkook’s closet and take a look.
You audibly gasp, the purple marks that spread across your neck and collarbone are ones for the books.
“What the hell Jeon! How am I supposed to walk out of here today! Everyone’s going to see this!” you gesture towards yourself. “Oh my god.” You turn back to look in the mirror. “This is horrible.”
Jungkook leaves the bed to join you at the mirror,
“Holy shit.” He looks at himself, “I’m not any better!” he throws his hands up but he’s laughing. He’s fucking laughing! You watch in disbelief as he chuckles the fucking day away.
You watch him and you can’t help but start to laugh too. This is just so ridiculous.
“Wait wait…” Jungkook calms down, suddenly becoming serious. “We didn’t do anything else…right?”
“Why are you looking at me like that? Shouldn’t you also remember?”
“You’re the girl! Can’t you like tell…if we…” He motions his hands between your bodies.
“Oh my god. No, we didn’t do anything else. Do you really not remember everything?” you ask with a frown.
“I feel like I do…but I was just being you know, sure.”
Jungkook wishes he could remember everything in great detail but the reality is he was really drunk and some moments are hazier than others. Which is a fucking shame because he wants to remember the first moment you caressed his skin to his lips on yours.
“Do you remember everything?”
“I remember enough.” You admit.
You were drunk, yes. But the memory of you and Jungkook is almost crystal clear and fresh in your mind.
“Bottom line is…we were really drunk and drunk people do stuff like that all the time.” Your hands go to your hips, “I mean, I’ve literally made out with Trina before. Don’t feel special.” You wink, your tone is light and teasing and Jungkook finds you amusing.
“Just two drunk idiots.” Jungkook grins. “So no acting weird.”
“I won’t be weird, will you?”
“I’ll try my best.” He chuckles.
“I’m serious Jungkook, we can be cool about this…” you give him a smile, “It’s not like we haven’t—”
“Stop…” Jungkook lifts his hand up, “I get it.” He chuckles awkwardly.
Your small smile fades, your heart pinches. He never wants to talk about it, did he hate it that much?
“Right…” You begin walking closer towards him and he steps back, your heart pinching once again. “Well, lend me a fucking turtle neck or something so I can get outta here.”
Jungkook smirks down at you as he walks to his closet.
“Fine. Hopefully I have two…I have a black and a white one right?” he asks you from inside his closet.
“Shit, I think I have your white one at my place…”
“I don’t think Nick owns any…”
“Why do you need one? Just stay home today.”
“I’m supposed to meet Vanessa later…”
Your heart doesn’t just pinch this time, it sinks. Deep down into your lower belly until its falling to the ground.
“Oh.”
“I’ll find a scarf or some shit.”
“I’ll bring you your white one, don’t worry.”
“Really? Thanks y/n.” Jungkook walks out of his closet smiling at you, his black turtle neck draped over his arm. “Here.” He hands it over to you.
“Turn around.”
Jungkook raises a brow at you until realization hits him.
“Okay.” He whispers out.
You quickly change into the long sleeve shirt and let Jungkook know he can turn back around.
“I feel like I should make you breakfast or something…” Jungkook scratches the back of his neck, standing here awkwardly.
“Really Jungkook?” you laugh out, “And what would you make me?”
“I think Nick has some toaster waffles.” Jungkook offers with a grin.
“I’m good. I’m gonna head out but I will be back with your shirt!”
“Sounds good, I’ll walk you out.”
You two nod at one another, exiting the bedroom and walking towards the front door. You stop to say goodbye and Jungkook steps into your space, wrapping his arms around you.
“See you in a bit.” He whispers.
“Yeah.” You pull back and smile at him. “See you in a bit.”
~~~~~
“Why the fuck are you wearing a black turtle neck in the middle of August?”
It’s Trina, if you haven’t guessed. It’s the first thing you hear when you step into your apartment, she is over to hang with Holly you’re assuming.
“I was a bit chilly.” You lie through your teeth, giving her a strained smile.
“Take it off.” Trina commands.
“Trina…” Holly warns softly, she’s got her hand on Trina’s shoulder and you can’t help but giggle.
“Wait, your date was last night, right? With this ‘Min Yoongi’? Ooooh, did things go well?” Trina whistles out.
“It wasn’t a date, I already told you…” you whine as you walk into the living room, sitting on the sofa.
“But it did go well! I had a really nice time.” You admit softly, smiling at the memory of your ‘thank you outing’. “He’s so cool and so sweet.” Your eyes light up, “He owns the record shop a few shops away from the bakery!”
“Owns it? Like it’s his?” Holly asks, she shares a pleased smile with Trina.
“Yes, like it’s his.”
“He sounds like a man. Marry him.” Trina gives you an aggresive thumbs up.
“Chill dude.” You laugh. “I think he and I could become really good friends…and…”
“And?”
“Well, you never know.” Your eyes shift to the side as you smirk. “The world is full of mystery.”
Trina smiles brightly, “So you’re saying there’s a chance?”
“I’m saying that there’s not not a chance…”
“I’LL TAKE IT!” Trina lifts up Holly’s hand and high fives herself with it. “Whatever isn’t Jungkook.” She finishes with a grin and you feel your whole body go stiff.
“Trina…” you frown, “I really don’t like when you say stuff like that. Jungkook is a good person. He just…he messed up, yes. But he’s trying.”
“He hurt you.” Trina’s tone goes serious. “How could you forgive him for that?”
“I’m trying too. But I am able to try because I know him…he wouldn’t just hurt me without him having his own reasons…and I love him, T. Like as friends, of course but also…”
“I know.” Trina goes soft, “I know.”
Holly clasps her hands together, “And that’s that! How about we make some food and chit chat some more over some mimosas!”
“I love that idea.” You say.
“But seriously girl, please go change out of that turtle neck…you’re making me sweat just looking at you.” Trina says.
Right, the turtle neck. You told Jungkook you would drop off his white one…well, you gotta find it first.
“Okay, but I have to run an errand first then we can hang.”
“An errand?” Both girls look at you quizzically.
“Don’t worry about it.” Great, now you sound like Jungkook.
~~~~~
Within the hour you are quickly dropping off Jungkook’s shirt off at his place and going back to yours. He answered the door in nothing but his towel again and you tried so hard not to drool. You recall the night before when your fingers were dragging down his chest and his toned stomach. You felt every ab beneath your fingertips. Fuck, that felt good. You’re home now, you shake your head trying to rid yourself of thoughts of Jungkook’s body. But with a body like that? It’s so so hard. Just like how he was…STOP. You shake off these thoughts and try to pay attention to what Holly is saying.
“—And then I turned it in anyway and still got an A!”
“That’s amazing Holly.” You say, trying to act like you weren’t just having impure thoughts.
“Yeah, you totally kick ass.” Trina says.
You girls are a few mimosas in, you feel the champagne starting to work its wonderful magic on you but unfortunately it is making you start to sweat. You want to take off this damn turtleneck.
“I’ll be right back.” You say quickly before retreating to your bedroom. You find a baggy t-shirt and slip it on. This feels much better! But god damn. These marks on your skin are something else. You rush to the bathroom and try to cover some with makeup but it’s hardly helping. Fuck.
“Welp, maybe they won’t notice.” You whisper to yourself.
You walk back out into the living room and you notice both Holly and Trina’s eyes go comically wide.
“Wow, that date did go better than you thought!” Trina starts whooping and hollering.
“Wow y/n.” Holly really does look shocked.
Okay, so maybe they did notice. You feel so self conscious all of the sudden, your hands flying up to your neck to cover yourself.
“It’s—It’s not what it looks like.” You stammer out.
“It looks like this Yoongi guy is really into marking!” Trina yells out with a grin.
“Yoongi is really into marking…” Holly eyes you with horror in her eyes.
“Yoongi! Yoongi! Yoongi!” Trina begins chanting, she looks over at Holly and lightly taps her thigh to get her to start chanting the name as well.
“Guys…” You whine into your hands, “It wasn’t Yoongi.” You must be admitting that because you’ve had a few mimosas.
Silence. The room falls undeniably quiet.
“Wait what?” Trina asks, her wide grin beginning to fade.
“Did you meet with someone else last night?” Holly begins to pry.
“Did you go to a bar or something and meet a rando?”
“Did you bump into someone on the street?”
“Did you call up and old boyfriend? An old hookup?”
“Guys!” You yell out, “I met up with Jungkook last night!”
Once again, the room goes silent.
“You what?” Trina asks plainly, “What does that have to do with the hickeys on your neck?”
“Really Trina?” your head falls into your hands, “We kind of…”
“You guys fucked? Really?” Trina’s serious tone is back.
“No! We just got really drunk and made out! That’s it!”
“But is that really it for you?” To your surprise, it’s Holly who asks this.
“It’s fine. We were just drunk. We decided not to be weird about it. And we won’t.”
“How can you be sure of that?” Trina asks, her voice gone soft.
“Because I will text him in a few days, he’s going to text back. Or I’ll call and he will answer like normal. I’ll ask to hang out or something and we will just be two friends who hang. It will go just like that!”
Except it doesn’t go like that at all. A few days pass and you decided to text Jungkook in the morning after you woke up. You don’t expect to hear back from him for a couple of hours since he will probably sleep in. But hours and hours go by and it’s the afternoon now and you still haven’t heard from him.
“You have reached the voicemail box of…” You click the end button on your phone again for like, the 6thtime. Why isn’t Jungkook answering? It’s a Wednesday afternoon, you know you remember him saying he had today off for some reason so what is he up to? Even if he was with Vanessa, would he really ignore you like this? 6 calls in a row?
You decide to try Jimin, maybe they’re together. You look him up in your ‘Favorites’ and click clack away to calling him. After several rings the boy finally answers,
“Hey.” He says somewhat out of breath, “I’m working, what’s up?”
“Hey it’s nothing really…” you begin, “But have you heard from Jungkook…? I can’t get a hold of him…”
“Huh? No? Maybe he’s just, I don’t know, busy babe.” You can hear Jimin directing some poor child of his wrong moves on the other side of the phone.
“Look, I gotta go. But just try again in a little while, okay?”
“Can you try calling him for me?”
“Huh? Uh, sure. I’ll let you know later. Love you, bye.” Jimin hangs up and you’re left with your phone to your ear, talking to no one.
It’s Wednesday evening now, you and Holly are sharing a pie while watching some weird show on Netflix that Holly insists is good. You’re three episodes in and you’re starting to wonder when the ‘good’ part happens. It’s mostly just been weird but Holly seems invested in it. You’re trying to keep your mind busy, the thought of Jungkook making you feel antsy. You just wanted to call and see if he wanted to chill together…to prove things aren’t going to be weird between you two. Is he really going to be so fucking immature? Big deal, you made out. But to go this far to ignore you? You can’t help but feel so fucking anxious. He won’t ghost you again right?
You mindlessly stick your fork in the pie repeatedly when you feel your phone buzz. Thank God, some sort of reason to look away from this show, you think.
Jimin 6:22pm
Hey, I got a hold of Jungkook…
What the hell? So he answered to Jimin?!
Jimin 6:22pm
It’s probably best to let him be today babe, today is…not a good day
You click off your phone and throw it on the cushion to your side because what the hell does that mean? Not a good day? If he’s not having a good day then shouldn’t he like, lean on you? Wait, you’re asking for too much right? You mean, you’re the one who set boundaries. But if he’s having a bad day why ignore you? You throw the fork in the pie and set it next to Holly, she looks at you mortified that you would just throw your fucking fork. You stand to your feet and start heading to your room.
“Uh, where are you going? Things are just getting good.” Holly whines.
“I’ll be back in a little while Hol, just gotta do something real quick.” You call out from behind you, entering your room to change into some clean clothes.
Once you’re ready you grab your purse and your keys and head towards the front door, and out to your car.
It’s a really quick drive to Jungkook’s apartment, he lives so close to you it’s ridiculous. He couldn’t find an apartment that was further away from his old one? Well, still…you’re grateful it’s a short drive. You wonder how you’ll confront Jungkook. He isn’t the best at opening up so you have to go about this strategically. But knowing you, you’ll be anything but strategic. It’s just with Jungkook you really have to force it out of him—whatever it is. Even then you may get nothing.
You find a parking spot a little a ways from the building, it’s a nice refreshing two minute walk to get inside to find and ride the elevator. You remember riding this elevator with nick and oh god, cringe. You cringe so fucking hard. Speak of the devil, he’s who answers the front door after your insistent knocking.
“Oh hey y/n. What’s up?” Nick’s eyes dart from you to the rest of the hallway. “Is it just you?” he asks, “Jungkook isn’t here…”
“Can I wait inside until he gets home?” you blurt out.
“Uh, sure…” Nick opens the door wider for you to enter. You breeze past him, taking off your shoes at the entrance and make your way to the couch. Damn, you are a woman on a mission.
“Can I get you some water?” Nick offers as he closes the door.
“Sure.”
Nick comes into the living room with a glass full of water and you couldn’t be more grateful. You didn’t even realize how dry your mouth has gotten, the anticipation of Jungkook’s arrival making you nervous.
“Do you know where he went?” you take the glass from Nick and gulp down like half the glass. “He hasn’t answered me all day.”
“Wait, he doesn’t know you’re here?” Nick asks in panicked surprise. “Should you really be here? He might be with Vanessa or like, coming back with her…”
“It’s fine. I’m waiting, is that okay?” you nibble on your lips, waiting for his response.
“Yeah, I guess.” Nick shrugs, “I’ll be in my room if that’s okay? You can watch whatever on TV or like, whatever.” He smiles at you, gesturing towards the TV.
“I’ll be fine Nick.” You smile back.
More than an hour passes, a god damn miserable hour of you sitting on Jungkook and Nicks couch when you finally hear the front door being unlocked. Jungkook.
You straighten up when you hear the door beginning to open, the soft creak sounding a million times louder in your ears.
Jungkook walks through and you notice he is alone, and you sigh in relief. His shoulders are slumped and his head hangs low as he takes his shoes off and you immediately sink in your spot. What’s with him? So, you stand to your feet and clear your throat and he doesn’t even flinch. He just continues walking inside, finding his way into the kitchen. You watch as he opens up a cabinet and reaches for a glass, next he’s fishing the fridge for some fresh water and filling up his cup. He takes a few sips of his water before his dark eyes find you.
“What are you doing here?” his low voice sends a shiver down your spine.
“You went ghost on me today…I was worried.” You leave the living room to walk into the kitchen as well.
“I…” he begins as he sets the glass on the counter. “I didn’t ghost you.”
“How could I be so sure?” you step closer to him, “How come you answered Jimin but not me?”
Jungkook’s eyes widen at your words, like a deer caught in headlights. He blinks at you repeatedly until he tries forming words.
“It’s nothing personal.” He settles for. “Can we talk tomorrow, y/n?”
“Where did you go today?” God, why do you sound like some weird, possessive girlfriend? You cringe at your own words.
“It doesn’t matter.” Jungkook’s eyes darken again, his voice low.
“It matters to me.”
Jungkook looks down at the floor and you notice him take a few deep breaths, like he is struggling to find a steady one.
“Talk to me, Jungkook.” You reach out to him, your fingers finding his and he flinches at your touch. “What’s wrong? Please talk to me.”
“I….” Jungkook’s voice cracks and you wish you could bring him in to hug you but you don’t. You just let him continue.
“I…have nothing to say.”
Oh. Of course. Of fucking course. Of course Jungkook chooses to stay silent. Of course he chooses not to talk to you.
“Is it Vanessa?” you finally find the courage to ask, “Did you two break—”
“No, we’re fine.” He cuts in. Jungkook frees himself from your hand and looks up at you with a strained smile, “I’m fine, y/n.”
Now, you shouldn’t feel upset. Or angry. But you do, you fucking do. It’s been almost 4 years of this same bullshit where he cannot open up to you and its starting to feel insulting.
“You’re…” you step closer to him again but he takes a step back until he’s backed into the counter. “You aren’t fine. Please talk to me, Jungkook.” You try to say calmly but you think the rage is a little evident in your voice.
“Nothing to talk about.”
“Is it because I’m a girl?”
Jungkook tilts his head to the side, not knowing what you mean by that. Yeah, that was a stupid thing to assume but you aren’t smart right now.
“You can’t confide in girls because you have trust issues? You know, because of your mom…how she left you…”
“Stop.”
“That’s it right?” You volume increases as your anger shows, “Are you fucking serious? When have I ever made you feel like you couldn’t trust me? When have I ever fucking left you?”
“Shut up.”
“No! And yeah your mom left you so you like, don’t trust girls I guess but god damn, Jungkook maybe it’s time to get over—”
“I said shut up!” Jungkook’s voice rises to a volume you have never experienced with him before.
“Have you tried looking for her?” you continue to speak, not realizing you are making everything worse.
“I know where she is.” He states, his nostrils flaring.
You flail your arms around, “Then go fucking talk to her.”
Jungkook looks at you with an unreadable expression, his shoulders to his ears and his fists balled up at his sides. He’s quiet. Too quiet. His breaths are beyond shaky and you finally notice it.
Jungkook’s eyes are glossed over and you think you may have gone too far. His lip begins trembling and he tries to speak but no words come out. He struggles to speak to you and it makes you blink at him like an idiot. Why can’t he speak?
“Jung—”
Jungkook lifts a hand up to stop you from talking any further. He inhales sharp breaths and releases shaky ones. His eyes are full of tears but none fall. He stares down at the ground just trying to do something as easy as breathing, but he falls short.
“Jung—”
“Please.” He croaks out. Jungkook walks to the couch and sits down, his head falling into his hands and you aren’t entirely sure at first but after a few moments you really realize…he is softly and quietly crying. Your Jungkook who never cries in front of anyone is sitting on his living room couch crying. You’re speechless. You also don’t know what to do. Do you try to comfort him? Do you leave him alone? But how could you leave him alone when he sits on his fucking living room couch sniffling away?
You hesitantly walk towards the sofa and take a seat next to him. He doesn’t lift his head to look at you, just continues crying into his hands. You don’t have to think about it, you reach your hand to rub soothing circles on his back and start whispering words of comfort in his ear.
Several moments pass when Jungkook finally lifts his head from his hands, but he still doesn’t look at you.
“Mom…” he clears his throat. “Mom didn’t just leave us. She left everything. She left me.”
“I know Jungkook…I’m sorry… I just lashed out on you, you can heal at your own pace and if she wants to see you again, she will.” You continue to rub his back.
“No, you don’t get it.” Jungkook murmurs. “Mom was hurting a lot. You know?” he begins to get choked up, his throat burning.
“Dad cheated, yes. But he was also neglectful of her and she was in a lot of pain,” he sniffs repeatedly, wiping his nose on his sleeve.
“She felt like she had no one, not even me.” Jungkook face scrunches up as he resists more tears.
“She couldn’t even rely on me.”
Fuck. You know where this is going. It is all starting to make sense.
“Mom killed herself when I was 16.” Jungkook finally says, his voice barely above a whisper, like he was too afraid to say it out loud. Like it made it more real.
“Dad didn’t take it well…he started drinking and I rarely saw him around…I had to take care of myself.” Jungkook finally lets the tears fall.
“I hated him. I still do.” Jungkook clenches his jaw.
You sit on the couch unable to comprehend what Jungkook has gone through. You feel like the biggest bitch alive. You forced your best friend to reopen his wounds in front of you and you had the audacity to pour salt in them.
“Jungkook I’m so—”
“Forget it.” He’s quick to cut you off. You stare at him with wide eyes, your own tears staining your cheeks.
“Please leave me alone for a while.” He whispers and immediately you stop him from rising from the couch.
“No!” you pull him back down. He doesn’t even resist, he falls back to your side and you lead his head to rest on your beating chest.
“I’m here for you, Jungkook.”
And that’s it. That’s what it took for Jungkook to scrunch and twist his face until more tears begin flowing out of his swollen eyes. He cries into your shirt, wetting the material.
“It’s okay, it’s okay.” You pat his head, your fingers weaving through his dark locks.
Jungkook cries like this for several minutes, until he’s wiping away his tears and snot with his shirt sleeve. He rises from your chest and looks at you with a painful expression.
“Today is mom’s birthday.” He admits.
Fuck.
“I went to her grave today…” he sniffles, “I’m sorry I couldn’t tell you before. It’s just…” he starts crying again, “Saying it out loud. Makes it real, don’t you think?” His face is swollen and puffy from his tears and you can’t stop your own tears from sliding down your cheeks.
“Jungkook, I’m so, so sorry.” You feel awful. You can’t even fathom what he has gone through…
“It’s okay, this was bound to happen eventually right?” he laughs awkwardly, snot still dripping from his nose.
“I shouldn’t have forced it out of you…God, I am so sorry.”
“I…” Jungkook’s eyes refill with tears as he tries to speak again, “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you before, I really am. I tried so many times but I just couldn’t say it out loud. I just couldn’t.” The tears fall down his face once again, “I tried.” He begins to cry harder. “I really tried y/n.”
You heart breaks. This is a sight you never want to see again but if anyone has to see it you want it to be you.
“Baby…” you whisper. “I’m here. I’ll always be here.”
“You’d never leave me…right?” Jungkook chokes on his words as he speaks. “I couldn’t handle it.”
You shut your eyes as you think about what Jungkook has gone through. You think about why he’s been so closed off and why he has troubles with people sometimes—especially girls.
“I wouldn’t ever leave you.” You say in promise. “You’re too important to me.”
Jungkook’s face falls back into your chest, he cries into your shirt for several more minutes as you rub his back and play with his hair.
“Wasn’t I important to mom too?” You hear him whisper.
Your heart breaks even more.
“Of course you were, Jungkook.” You try to save, “I know she must have loved you a lot.”
“Then why?”
“She must of thought you were going to be strong enough without her…” Your fingers thread through his hair again, “And you are. But you know, you aren’t completely without her…” Your hand goes to his chest, over his beating heart.
“She’s here too, with you.”
And with that, Jungkook sobs harder. Like, it’s the first time he’s cried over this. And you wonder if it is. He’s gripping on to your shirt so tightly as he releases intense sob after the other. Your heart continues to fucking break.
“I’m here. I’m here.”
It’s been quiet the last 30 minutes, neither you nor Jungkook have spoken. He’s not even crying anymore, just lightly sniffling every now and then. You wonder if he has fallen asleep. You wouldn’t be surprised, all that crying will take out all the energy out of a person…
You lean your head down to get a look at Jungkook’s peaceful face…he is sleeping. You feel yourself relax as you continue to play with his hair. He needs the rest, you think.
You feel your own eye lids getting heavy and you let yourself fall asleep as well. Jungkook snuggles deeper into your side, his face nuzzling in your chest and you hold him tighter. You two sleep like this for many hours until you’re being woken up at the sound of the blender going.
The living room is lit up with sunlight and your eyes blink lazily. You realize Jungkook isn’t sleeping with you anymore and you start to panic. Where did he go? Then the blender goes off again and you decide to stand from the couch, even though your body feels so heavy.
Jungkook is in the kitchen when you walk over, he’s got his back turned to you and you creep up behind him.
“Boo.” You say, wrapping your arms around him.
“When will you realize that will never work on me?” Jungkook lightly chuckles, “Sorry to wake you up. I figure I could make us some fruit smoothies.” He turns around in your hold. You eye him up and notice how puffy his eyes are and you feel your heart drop.
“Fruit smoothie sounds delicious.” You squeeze him tighter and Jungkook laughs a wonderful laugh. It’s loud and full and filled with joy.
“Hug me back.”
Jungkook smiles down at you and circles his arms around your waist, “Sorry, sorry.”
You smile back up at him and lean your head on his body, he feels so warm it could melt you.
“About last night…” Jungkook begins pulling away from you, “I’m sorry I kind of…”
“You don’t have to apologize.” You cut in. “It’s my fault.”
“No y/n…I’m glad things happened the way they did. I actually feel so much better.” He admits, “Lighter, even.”
“Oh? Well, good. But I am still so fucking sorry.”
“It’s okay baby.” He goes back in to hug you tighter. You feel his strong arms hold on to you and you want to stay like this forever. You would if you could. But—
“Shit. What time is it?” You step back from him, digging in your pocket for your phone. “Holy hell, I’m going to be late for work.”
“Then get going. I’ll text you later?” Jungkook asks with hope filling his eyes.
“Yeah.” You smile.
~~~~~~
Work was lame as usual, nothing eventful happened. Yoongi must have been too busy at the shop today since he didn’t come in for cookies. You decide you will go see him at the record shop tomorrow but for now…you’re dealing with something else—someone else.
“Oh? You thought Trina wouldn’t tell me?” It’s Jimin. He’s sitting on the edge of your bed with a popsicle between his lips. “Huh Miss Hickeys?”
“Jimin.” You drag his name out, “It’s not a big deal!” you throw your hands up in exasperation. “We were just really drunk and it didn’t mean anything. Just two drunk idiots.”
“Idiots, for sure.” Jimin sucks on the tip of the popsicle while he speaks.
“Seriously, it isn’t a big deal. We’re both over it.”
“Are you? You like him and he…fuck, this is getting so ridiculous. Promise me, just promise me…you will tell him the truth? You might be sur—”
“Jimin, stop.”
Jimin huffs out a deep, long breath and rolls his eyes at you.
“No.” he says matter of fact. “I won’t stop until you two talk.”
“Anyway there’s something more important we need to talk about…” you begin, “He told me about his mom.”
Jimin’s expression goes from shocked to guilty. He takes a few moments to finish the popsicle, biting the last inch or two and throwing the stick in the trashcan.
“I know. He told me.”
“Oh.”
“He’s been wanting to tell you for a long time y/n…but he just—”
“I know. It must have been really hard for him…all this time…”
“Yeah.” Jimin bows his head, “Me and Tae are the only ones who know because we were friends with him when it happened. That’s the only reason why or else I’m not sure anyone would know.”
“Is that…is that Jungkook’s secret? That you three…”
Jimin’s eyes expand as he realizes what you are talking about.
“N-No.” He admits softly, “That’s something else. That’s something Jungkook will definitely have to tell you on his own and trust me if you guys just talked…”
You tilt your head in confusion. What’s the correlation?
“Anyway, Jimin has Jungkook ever cried to you? About it all?” you ask, curiosity getting the best of you.
“He didn’t even cry at the funeral y/n.”
Fuck. You had a feeling. But knowing for sure is a whole other thing. The way Jungkook broke down in front of you felt like it was his first time and maybe it was and that makes your heart ache.
“Did he…cry? In front of you?” Jimin asks, his voice barely above a whisper.
“Yeah…”
“Oh… he must really trust you.”
You only nod your head in response.
“If you guys just learned to communicate better…I’m really rooting for you two.”
Your heart swells at Jimin’s little confession and you nod your head again, this time with tears pricking at the corner of your eyes.
“Thanks Jimin.” Finally, you feel supported. And it makes you breathe just a little easier.
“I know things haven’t always been easy with you two ever since the Tae thing…but honestly this goes back even further. Doesn’t it?”
“Yeah. We…I don’t know what’s with us.” You chuckle bitterly.
“I do. And I am going to force you two to talk one of these days. I swear on it. I will give you guys some time but damn babe, this is just…” Jimin releases a long breath. “Just don’t give up, okay?”
“Can’t you just tell me?” you don’t mean to sound like you are begging but you kind of do.
“No. It’s truly truly not my place.”
“I can’t just assume what you are talking about, you know? I can’t hope for the best then get crushed. That’s too scary, Jimin.”
“I understand babe.” Jimin scoots closer to you until he’s within arms-reach and caresses your calve. “Just talk to him, please.”
“Too scary.”
“One of these days one of you will have the courage.”
~~~~~~
“And what could be in this little baggy of yours?” Yoongi grins, showing his wonderful gummy smile.
“I brought you 2 cookies Mister Oatmeal Raisin!” You shake the little bag in front of his face in a teasing manner and he chuckles.
“What did I do to deserve your kindness?” He takes the baggy from you and inspects both cookies. “You decided not to be bratty today?” he questions with a smile. “These cookies are perfect.”
You decided to visit the record shop today, on this fine afternoon. It’s one of those days where it’s cloudy and looks like it could rain but it never does. You love days like that.
“This place looks so nice!” you say, bobbing your head around to get a proper look.
“There’s a section where you can sit and drink coffee…it’s not much but its cozy. Wanna check it out?” Yoongi offers, gesturing towards the other side of the shop.
“Yeah.” You say, “Lead the way.”
He guides you to the other side of the shop next to a window. There’s a table for two and he’s right—it is cozy looking.
You sit down and wait for Yoongi as he fetches two coffees, which you are so excited about since you have a fucking addiction.
He sets a cup down in front of you and takes his seat.
“So any new happy moments in life? Anything new to be grateful for?”
“I—”
“That’s a trick question,” Yoongi’s eyes go small as he smiles widely, “There’s always new moments to be grateful for.”
You can’t help but laugh, you bring the steaming hot coffee to your mouth and you blow on the liquid multiple times before bringing it to your lips and taking a sip.
“Yes I guess so.” You smile.
“And what are they?”
“I’m grateful the sun is hiding today, I like the clouds a lot.”
“I love that.” Yoongi takes a sip of his own coffee. “What else?”
“I’m happy you brought me coffee.”
“I’m glad I somehow made it on your list of things.”
“What about you?” you ask.
“I’m grateful my A.C is working again!” he laughs, “It was actually broken for a couple days and I had like 5 fans plugged in around the place. I don’t think anyone wanted to come in here.”
“Oh no! Well, I’m glad it’s working!”
“How are things with your friend Jungkook? You guys were complicated last time I checked.”
You raise your brows in surprise that Yoongi would bring up Jungkook. But somehow you also aren’t surprised, it seems Yoongi takes a genuine interest in your life.
“We’re actually doing okay…” You bring the coffee back to your lips, taking another sip when—
“Have you told him your feelings yet?” Yoongi casually takes a gulp of coffee as you choke on yours.
“Excuse me?”
“Sorry…was that too forward?” Yoongi sets his cup down. “To be fair, you both are very obvious.
“What do you means us ‘both’?” You grab a napkin and wipe your chin where coffee dribbled.
“He clearly likes you too.” Yoongi stares at you as you stare back with a blank expression, and he laughs. “You two remind me of myself and someone I used to know.”
“Used to?”
“We were never on the same page…too many missed opportunities that it ruined anything we could have had.” Yoongi frowns for a split second before breaking out into a soft, gummy smile. “I’d hate to see that happen to you.”
“Yoongi—”
“But if it does then better for me?” he whispers with a smile in his voice.
“What do you mean by—”
“Oh. But he has a girlfriend, right?” Yoongi cuts you off with his question.
“Not exactly but basically…”
Vanessa. Your stomach drops at the mention of her and you hate it. Why does she have to have such a strong affect on you? Why does she even have to exist? You mean, she can exist but maybe not in your life—or Jungkook’s life.
Suddenly, the doors bell goes off with a ding and Yoongi is smiling brightly at whoever just walked in. You continue to sip your coffee not giving it much mind.
“Taehyung!” Yoongi shouts out, standing from his chair to wave over his friend.
Wait, Taehyung? He can’t mean the same Taehyung—
“y/n?”
Oh shit. You turn around in your seat and your face falls when you see him. Even on this cloudy day his skin is so golden like the sun is shining down on him, he looks bright and beautiful. As usual.
“Hi Taehyung.” You wave awkwardly. He can immediately tell how uncomfortable you are, his face deepening into a frown.
“I can come by later…” he offers to you.
“No, no. Don’t be ridiculous.” You try smiling but it’s quite tense.
Yoongi looks between you two and he points between your bodies.
“You two know each other?”
“We went to school together, had mutual friends blah blah blah.” You say.
Taehyung only agrees with the nod of his head. Yoongi blinks at your two and opens his mouth to say ‘Ah.’ And heads to the back for another cup of coffee.
“How have you been y/n?” Taehyung asks awkwardly, he shifts from one foot to the other as he stands here.
“Pretty good, I think.”
“You think?” he chuckles. “Hey, sorry if my texts bother you…”
“They don’t.” you say honestly. “Sorry I don’t always reply.”
“It’s okay, I understand. How’s…Jungkook?” Taehyung eyes shoot down to the floor. “He doesn’t answer my texts either. It really hurts to see years of friendship go down the drain…”
“He’s mad at you Tae,” You begin, “But I think one of these days he will chill out.” You laugh and this makes Taehyung ease up.
“He really fucking loves you.”
“Well we are best friends… sort of.”
“Sort of?”
“We kind of stopped talking for a little while but we’re back to being friends.” You try explaining but Yoongi is walking back in with a cup of coffee in hand. He hands it to Taehyung, which he accepts gratefully.
“You’re here for that new Jazz mix record, right? I have it behind the counter for you.” Yoongi says to Taehyung and Taehyung only gives him a thumbs up. He eyes you curiously, wondering what the hell happened between you and Jungkook.
“I have to get back to work boys!” You stand from the table, “Thanks for the coffee Yoongs”
Yoongi smiles at the new nickname.
“And maybe I’ll see you around, Tae?”
“Yeah.” Taehyung gives you his signature boxy grins and you feel like maybe things all around are getting better. Just maybe.
~~~~~
Jungkook has his hands knotted in Vanessa’s hair as she chokes on his cock, her lips wrapped around it fully.
“Fuck.” Jungkook whines out, “I’m so close.”
Vanessa only moans in response, she continues to bob her head up and down on his dick making his orgasm approach quickly.
“Gonna come, gonna come.”
And he does, he comes down her throat and she swallows it all perfectly. Only a drop or two left behind on her lips which she quickly wipes away with her fingers.
Vanessa stands to her feet and Jungkook pulls her in for a quick kiss.
“That was good…” he says, somewhat out of breath.
“Glad.” She says smoothly, going in for another kiss. This time she lingers, her lips lasting for a moment longer on his.
Vanessa’s fingers brush against his neck, she traces the outline of one last bruise left on the side below his ear.
“Did you think I wouldn’t notice?” she smiles coyly. “You two sure are weird.” She says flatly.
“Vanessa…”
“It’s fine. I know you know I still see him. It’s not like we agreed to be exclusive.” She taps her skinny fingers on his chest.
“But we are trying aren’t we? To make this work?”
“You aren’t trying very hard, are you?” the amusement in her voice doesn’t go unnoticed by Jungkook.
“He cheated on you, Vanessa. Why are you still seeing him? I thought you said he has a girlfriend now?”
Vanessa pauses her tapping on his chest, her eyes go wide for a second. Like, for a second she wasn’t void of emotion.
“He does.” She says smoothly before she begins tapping her fingers against his chest again.
“He cheated on me with this girl.” She admits, “Little does this bitch know—”
“Is that healthy? Getting revenge?” Jungkook asks, concern lacing his voice.
Vanessa continues to tap her fingers as she narrows her eyes at Jungkook.
“You want to talk to me about what’s healthy?” her empty laugh fills the room.
“I want you to stop.” Jungkook’s hands go to her hips, “Let’s be exclusive, Vanessa.”
“I can’t stop…” she whispers softly, “I can’t let go.”
Jungkook observes Vanessa for a few moments, she looks as vulnerable as she did the first time she talked about her ex with him. He feels sorry for her. He really does want her to move on, for her own sake.
“You can move forward, Vanessa. You have me.”
Vanessa looks into his eyes, studying his serious expression. She can tell he means well but…she doesn’t have him. She never will.
“Please Vanessa, we can make this work.” He begs, yes begs.
Vanessa tilts her head to the side. Oh? This must be his desperation talking, she thinks. His desperation to get over you. She knows this. And she doesn’t hold it against him and instead she decides to help him.
“Okay, let’s make this work.”
~~~~~~~
y/n 8:09pm
On a scale of 1-10 how bad do you wanna watch spirited away right now?
Jungkook 8:15pm
11 girl don’t play
y/n 8:16pm
I thought so, I think this means you need to come over and watch it w meeee
Jungkook 8:20pm
Lemme shower and I’ll be over:)
y/n 8:22pm
Bring beer pllllssss
Jungkook 8:42pm
On my way
y/n 8:45pm
Drive safe bb
It’s around 9pm exactly when you hear soft knocking on the front door. You scurry towards the door and open it, finding Jungkook on the other side. He is wearing your favorite gray puma sweat suit and his hair is wavy and damp. He smiles at you when he sees you eyeing him up and down.
“Like what you see?” he teases.
“Wow, what a classic line Jungkook. Real original.” You scoff, letting the boy through.
Jungkook walks in, setting down a case of beer on the breakfast table.
“I brought our favorite.” He gestures towards the beer on the table. “Let’s drink it while it’s nice and chilly.”
“Agreed. I already have the movie set up.” You point towards the T.V “Ready for our viewing pleasure.”
“Where’s Holly?” Jungkook takes two beers from the case, handing one over to you.
“Her and Trina went out to some bar, I didn’t feel like going.” You take the beer and twist off the cap, Jungkook does the same. You two clank the bottles together in cheers and take a few sips.
“Ah.” You say, the refreshing beer making you feel well, refreshed.
“Because you don’t feel like going to a bar? Or because you would rather hang out with me?” Jungkook smirks, taking another sip of his beer.
“Because I didn’t feel like getting pretty.” You bring the beer to your lips, but you don’t drink from the bottle, just waiting for a response instead.
“You’re always pretty.”
You take a sip of the beer, feeling satisfied with his response. “I know.” You half joke.
“Let’s go to a bar.” Jungkook blurts out.
“W-What?”
“Let’s go in our lounge clothes.” He smiles, “Let’s just do it.”
“No!” you laugh out, “We look like slobs. Well, I do. You look…” your hand motions towards his body, “You know, you look…”
“Are you trying to say I’m hot, y/n?” Jungkook’s sly smile grows as he drinks his beer.
“You know what I mean.” You huff out.
“Well, I think the same of you. So let’s go.”
You can’t help but laugh, you continue to drink your beer back, the liquid settling nicely.
“Okay. Fuck it, let’s do it.” You can’t help but grin, the idea of going to a bar in yoga pants and a t shirt with your sort of best friend sounds so great to you.
“But maybe a little makeup…” Jungkook starts chuckling as you hit his arm with your fist.
“Shut up.”
The bar is mostly pretty casual, maybe not as casual as you and Jungkook but still casual.
Only a small handful of people are actually dressed nicely, but mostly are in jeans and nice shirts. Somehow Jungkook is still the hottest guy here. Even in his sweat suit. You’re surprised you two even got let in, does this place not have some sort of dress code? Guess not.
It’s pretty loud inside, the place has a live band and a decent dance floor. You and Jungkook head towards the bar and take your seats.
The bartender takes a few minutes to reach you two and when she does she automatically nods at Jungkook for his order.
“Two long islands please.” He says, he smirks towards you and you smile back. Long islands? Oh you’re getting drunk drunk tonight.
“You got it.” She smiles at him with all her teeth, and turns around to start mixing the drinks.
“Long islands, huh?” you rest your head in your hand on the bar top.
“I figure neither of us are driving tonight, we might as well go hard.” Jungkook smiles at you. “I’ll buy this first round?”
“Sounds good to me.” You bump fists with Jungkook with a wide smile. “Wanna make a bet?”
“What’s that?” Jungkook quirks a brow at you.
“I bet you $5 that by the end of the night the bartender will hit on you.”
“But I also bet $5 that the bartender will hit on me.” Jungkook pouts.
You stare at him in disbelief at his cockiness and you burst out into giggles.
“Fair enough.” You say between laughs.
The bartender slides two drinks to you and Jungkook, she twists and twirls her hair in her fingers as she asks Jungkook how it tastes. He takes a sip and gives her a thumbs up, you can’t help but snicker.
“Can we also get two tequila shots?” you wave at the bartender. She turns to face you and frowns.
“Sure.” She puts on a fake smile and turns to fill up two shot glasses with tequila. She sets them in front of you a Jungkook and tells you the amount due.
“Tequila shots? Are we trying to fucking die tonight?” Jungkook chuckles from beside you. He grabs two limes and hands you one.
“To us.” You say, lifting your shot in the air.
“To you.” Jungkook whispers as you clank glasses and throw back the shots.
Holy shit, you are fucking wasted. After several tequila shots and a few long islands you and Jungkook are barely holding on. Okay, fine. It’s not that bad. But you guys are really drunk!
His hand hasn’t left your waist for hours, and it feels so fucking nice. It feels perfect. It feels right.
“y/n?” a voice calls out to you. You know this voice, really well in fact.
“Taehyung!” you cheer. You stumble forward and go in for a high five and his drunk ass high fives you back.
“Fancy seeing you again.” You giggle.
Jungkook’s hand grips your waist tighter as he narrows his eyes at Taehyung.
“What do you mean again?” Jungkook asks, his voice low.
“We ran into each other at my friend Yoongi’s” you slur out.
“Hi Jungkookie.” Taehyung awkwardly sways back and forth, his words also slurred. It’s obvious he’s on the same level as drunk as you.
“…Hey.” Jungkook hesitates to respond, he looks between you two. “y/n…is this okay? Talking to him?”
“Hm? Oh? Yeah.” You stare at Jungkook blankly. Why wouldn’t it be, you think.
“Jungkook, maybe we could talk just the two of us?”
You look between the boys and somehow you feel yourself sobering up just a bit.
“Uh. I’ll go to the bathroom.” You say, already walking away.
“You know how sorry I feel.” Taehyung begins, “About everything.”
“What’s everything?” Jungkook mumbles under his breath.
“I’m sorry for what I did to y/n. But I am also sorry for holding your secret over you like that to keep mine.”
“Yeah,” Jungkook slurs out, “That was fucked up.”
“I miss you guys…” Taehyung takes a sip of his drink, “Even Jimin barely talks to me.”
“Shouldn’t have messed with our girl.”
“You mean, your girl.” Taehyung drunkenly corrects Jungkook.
“Whatever.”
“Seriously man, when are you just going to grow the fucking balls?” Taehyung raises his voice just a bit, “It’s clear how you both feel—”
“You don’t know what you’re talking about man, plus I have a girlfriend now—”
“You guys are official now?” You walk up to the boys, cutting in. You feel like maybe he’s just saying that.
“y/n…yeah, we just made it official.” Jungkook admits, running a hand through his hair, sighing out in frustration.
Oh. You feel your heart begin to crumble. They’re dating for real now?
“Do you have feelings for her?” You blurt out.
Jungkook shifts from one foot to another, he breathes in and out in and out. He bites on his bottom lip, thinking of how to respond.
“I don’t know what to say to that.”
Well, at least he’s honest.
“Well, I’m going to head back to my friends…” Taehyung butts in awkwardly. “It was nice seeing you two.” And with that he’s slipping away in the crowd.
“Wanna dance?” you say, trying your best to change the subject. You decide you don’t want to know his answer.
“Sure.” Jungkook smiles at you, he reaches for your hand and you squeeze his tightly. You guide him to the dance floor, the song is a slow one. You two look at one another but there’s nothing awkward about this. He guides your arms to wrap around his neck and his hands circle around your waist, he pulls you in close as you two sway to the music.
“Never go 3 months without me again.” You whisper into his neck.
“W-Why are you bringing that up now?”
“I have to keep my eyes on you, Jungkook. Without my supervision you go off and get yourself a girlfriend.” Your drunken words pierce his heart.
“Is that a problem?” He whispers back. “Yes, a big problem.” You lean back to get a look at his face, he’s already staring down at you, he somehow brings you in even closer.
“Whys that?” He breathes out.
“Want you all for myself.” You admit, drunk words are sober thoughts right?
“You want me baby?” Jungkook leans down until he’s so close, like he cannot control it.
“Yes.” You blink up at him, your lips parted.
The song changes but you two continue to dance like it’s a slow song.
“I bet you $5 that some guy will hit on you in the next couple of minutes.”
You tilt your head and drunkenly giggle, “I highly doubt that.”
Jungkook reaches in his back pocket and hands you a five dollar bill.
“What’s this f—”
“You’re so fucking beautiful” and then his lips are just a mere inch away from yours before he’s pulling back with a look of horror and guilt plastered on his face.
“I—I’m sorry, I don’t know what’s gotten into me. I’m with Vanessa now. I’m just drunk. I’m really drunk. You’re really drunk. We don’t know what we’re doing.” He drunkenly rambles.
You feel your heart sink down into your lower belly, you feel it crack and break into a million pieces. That’s right. Vanessa. He’s making it work with that girl.
“Yeah, it’s okay.”
“You’re my best friend y/n.” Jungkook slurs out, “I’m trying so hard not to ruin that.”
You only nod your head.
“Let’s go home.” You say.
~~~~~~
Your bed is comfy as ever, especially this drunk. Jungkook takes his shirt off and slips into the sheets, settling next to you.
“Wanna cuddle?” he offers.
“I don’t know if Vanessa would like that.” You slur.
“Right.” Jungkook lays on his back, his arms folding beneath his head. “Should I sleep in the living room?”
“No. I want you here.” You admit between soft breaths. “I always want you here.” You yawn out.
“Good.” Jungkook reaches out to hold you, “I don’t think Vanessa will mind if I cuddle my best friend for just five minutes.”
“Five minutes only” you tease. You shuffle closer to him, his warmth escaping his body and clinging to yours.
You two fall asleep like this. Morning comes slowly, like the world is giving you a chance to really appreciate one another’s company. Like the world knows that moments like this are so hard to come by. Like the world knows that you two need this.
When you wake up the next day, its half past noon. You’re still in Jungkook’s arms while he is dead asleep. You nuzzle into his chest and thank the world for giving you this moment. This moment to embrace him like he is yours, a moment to kiss his cheek like he is yours, a moment to whisper you love him like he is yours.
But he isn’t. He isn’t yours and that’s the reality. But you thank the world nonetheless. Because you need these moments to stay sane. But how do you two always end up like this? Can you keep blaming the alcohol? He tried to kiss you last night and that’s also the reality.
Jungkook wanted to kiss you. Can he keep saying it’s just because he’s drunk?
But he’s with Vanessa now and you have to respect that. And you will respect that.
You thank the world though, that right now he’s in your arms, breathing your air, and sharing this moment. Just you and him.
Finally, after another half hour Jungkook begins to stir in his sleep.
You stare at him as he wakes up and his sleepy eyes find yours.
“G’morning.” His voice is low and raspy and you want to swoon.
“Hi.”
“We…” he looks between your bodies. “Didn’t do anything, right?”
You feel your chest tighten, “No, Jungkook.” You answer calmly.
“Okay…” Jungkook frowns, “We can’t keep doing this, can we?”
Somehow you know exactly what he’s talking about, you can’t keep building this tension between you two. It goes nowhere.
“No” You admit softly, “We can’t.”
You think about Jimin’s words…could Jungkook…? But you don’t want to jump to happy conclusions, put yourself out there and then be wrong. But he tried to fucking kiss you. The girls were right, is this really all for you? You can’t keep doing this. It’s not good for you. “We really can’t.” you say again.
Jungkook smiles, but its soft and sad and makes you want to kiss his pouting lips until he shows you a real smile but you can’t.
“I’m sorry about last night.” Jungkook moves to his back, he stares up at the ceiling.
“I was just really drunk.” He continues, “Drunk me is wild.” He chuckles awkwardly.
“Is that really an excuse anymore?” you feel brave enough to say.
“y/n…”
“Forget it. We’re okay.”
“Are we?” Jungkook moves back to his side, facing you. He gives you a troubled look and you melt. Why are you always melting because of this man?
“Yeah. What’s more important is that your birthday is next week…”
“Oh yeah.”
“Can I be in charge of your party?”
“I don’t want a party, just a couple of friends.”
“Let me host it!”
“Okay, fine.” Jungkook smiles, “I can’t wait.”
“Do I have to invite Vanessa?”
“y/n.” Jungkook groans.
“Kidding!” you sing. Although, you aren’t entirely sure that you’re just kidding.
“It would be nice if you could plan this with Vanessa actually…she mentioned wanting to do something nice for my birthday too.” He sort of whispers out, like he didn’t want you to actually hear.
“Oh.” You aren’t sure what to say. You obviously don’t want co-host a get together with Vanessa but she is his girlfriend after all.
“Fine.”
You and Vanessa? Let’s see how this goes.
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Text
I'm Yours, You're Mine | 7
Word Count: 4k
Genre: Smut, angst
Warnings: yandere!felix, sub!felix, dom!felix, sub!reader, dom!reader, mentions of violence, character death, drugging, noncon, breeding kink, binding, doggy
Tumblr media
GIF CREDIT @christopherbanq
You wake up in a warm embrace, surrounded by the sweet, vanilla scent of Felix. Opening your eyes, you’re met with the splatter of his freckles that seem to glow under the sunlight. Everything feels perfect. It feels right, and you wish you could stay in this moment forever, protected from all that has happened or will happen. But you can’t, the memories of last night’s darkness creep around the corners of the brightly lit room, seeping the warmth out of it until everything is plunged into darkness.
Felix opens his eyes, his bright sparkling eyes, unaware of the darkness surrounding him, his ignorance protecting him. But his light diminishes as his gaze focuses on you.
“Noona, why are you crying?” He asks, arms pulling you even closer to him to the point where you don’t know where your skin ends and his begins.
“Chan…” You sputter, little sobs rattling your chest now. Felix frowns sharply, “Did he do something to you?”
You shake your head, your tears now flowing down your cheeks. “He’s in the hospital. Someone attacked us while we were coming back from the cinema yesterday.”
Felix bolts upright, pushing you at an arm’s length and scrutinizing every inch of your body. “Are you hurt?”
“No, but Chan is.” You wail, throwing your arms around him and burying your face in his shoulder. “He’s hurt really bad.”
“Why didn’t you tell me?” For the first time, Felix doesn’t comfort you, his body rigid in your embrace and you hesitantly pull back to look at him. He is completely still, a numb look on his face. And you suddenly realize how thoughtless you’ve been. Despite their fight, Felix and Chan have been best friends for years, way before you met either of them. You should’ve told him as soon as it happened.
“Is he going to be okay?” His lips quiver as he speaks, his eyes terrified and looking through yours for help, and you could smack yourself for being so selfish.
“Oh, baby.” You breathe, pulling him into your embrace again. “I’m sure he’ll be okay.”
_______________________
He wasn’t.
Chan hasn’t woken up by the time you both visit him in the hospital, and the doctors were giving you vague responses every time you tried to ask about his condition--if he’s going to be okay, if he’s even gonna make it--and that petrifies you.
“We’re doing the best we can, but I can’t say anything for certain. He’s in a really bad condition.” The doctor informs you after you’d asked for the millionth time. You nod heavily and he lets you know that he’ll be there if there is anything else you need before he leaves. Yeah, right. The doctors were basically running from you at this point. You weren’t stupid. You knew what it meant.
“Thank you, doctor.” You mumble. You feel guilty, like this is all your fault for wishing for Felix to come back, like somehow this had been a bargain by a cruel god, giving you Felix back but taking Chan away.
As soon as the doctor leaves, Felix falls to the floor beside the bed sobbing. You run to him and wrap your arms around him and he immediately leans into your touch. “I did this.” He wails and your body goes stiff, your breath stuck in your throat, choking you.
But then he continues, “I wished for this the night he threw me out. I was so angry at him, but I never wanted it to really happen.”
Your body turns to jelly, the fear that had gripped it was so intense that it left no energy in its wake, and you can’t even caress Felix’s back to comfort him.
_______________________
The police interview you over and over, asking you to remember if there is something about the man who mugged you that you’re forgetting that could help identify him. You don’t have to force yourself to remember, you see him in your dreams every night, and every night you wake up screaming, poor Felix having to comfort you and kiss you back to sleep, never once complaining.
Through it all, those few agonizing days, you held a terrible secret close to your chest. You felt wretched just thinking about it, but you couldn’t help it. You knew he was going to die anyway. You just wished it would happen sooner than later so you could properly grieve instead of being stuck in this fake limbo, pretending like you think he’s going to make it, even to Felix, so that he wouldn’t completely break down.
You go to visit him less and less until you stop completely, which doesn’t paint you in a very favorable light in front of law enforcement or the doctors, letting Felix go on his own to the hospital every day. But fuck them. What do they know about the pain you’re going through? The guilt?
When it finally happens, you can’t believe it. They say he coded in the night and they tried to do everything to save him, even brought him back a couple of times, but it was ultimately useless. He was gone.
You had to see him for yourself to believe it. You went alone. Felix couldn’t bear to look at his best friend’s now dead body. He begged you not to go but you needed to.
As you gaze across his face, you’re thrust back to that night. You had heard that dead people often have a peaceful look on their face, but Chan didn’t look peaceful. It almost looks angry, accusatory, asking you why you weren’t there for him.
He doesn’t forgive you, but it’s okay. You don’t forgive yourself either.
_______________
The case officially turned into a murder investigation following Chan’s death. His body was handed over to the coroner to do an autopsy and try to gather any forensic evidence left, but neither yielded much information, and the police had no leads.
Soon, the case turned cold.
As for you, you had moved in with Felix,, unable to step back into your apartment without Chan. Fearing that in doing so you’d be acknowledging that he’s gone, and then his spirit would remember to come back to haunt you.
Felix takes such good care of you, even though he’s the one who has the right to be hurt more. He stuck around you all the time, making you feel safe and comforting you. He also kept his distance as much as he could. You could tell he wanted to seek comfort in your body, to help each other through this pain, but you were selfish as always. You only let him comfort you. You never comforted him back.
As the months passed, Felix started getting more and more needy, making you feel even more wretched even though he never said anything. He loved you and you loved him, but Chan’s death had pushed a wedge between you. You couldn’t touch the younger boy without feeling guilty. It felt like you were cheating on Chan more than you ever did before, and so you kept Felix at a distance.
For his part, Felix never outright made an advance on you, respecting your need to grieve, but you could tell from the boner he’d get every time you kissed him even a sweet innocent little kiss or put your arms around him that he needed more, and it made you feel even more horrible. You couldn’t help Chan when he was alive and now you can’t help Felix. You felt like the most selfish fucking human being in the world.
So when you’re woken up from sleep one night, feeling hot and with something hard poking against your ass, you decide to finally give back.
“Noona...” Felix whimpers into your ear, nuzzling his face in the nape of your neck, making goosebumps erupt along your body. You weren’t ready to go all the way yet but at least you could give him some release.
Turning on your back, you guide him to straddle you and let yourself slip into the right headspace. "You dirty little thing, humping your noona in her sleep?"
His eyes light up when he realizes that for the first time in a long time, you’re reciprocating, and he sighs in relief, starting to grind his hips against yours. Tantalizing, you lower the straps of your nightgown, a delicate pink satin piece that Felix bought for you, to expose your tits for him. He hums appreciatively, reaching out to touch, but you slap his hand away. “Only look.”
He shudders, nodding, and humps against you faster. "Noona, please, fuck me. Fuck your dumb baby."
"No whining." You reprimand, lifting his shirt up to his mouth and he obediently bites on it, muffling his noises. With the shirt up, his boxers are exposed, and you watch as every time he thrusts forward, the tip of his dick pokes out from his boxers, red and leaking. “And I thought you’d thank me for being so nice to a pervert like you.”
Felix pants around the fabric in his mouth, his dick dripping over your panties. Placing your hand on his ass, you feel the muscle clench and relax as he ruts desperately against you. “Is this how you wanna fuck noona? You think your little dick can make me feel good?”
He pushes the shirt out of his mouth with his tongue and babbles. “I can noona. Just let me put it inside.” He grabs his dick and runs the head of it over your clothed slit, making you shiver at the stimulation. Then he pushes the head against your hole but is prevented from pushing in because of the underwear “Just let me put it in, noona.”
“You’re a greedy little kitten aren’t you? Put your hands up to your chest, kitty.” You order, and he reluctantly obeys. “Now stick your tongue out and pant for me.”
He does so with a flush, looking like a cat in heat. Absolutely filthy.
“That’s it. That’s a good, boy. Putting on a show for noona.”
He nods happily, high off the praise you’re giving him. "I'm gonna cum for you noona. Watch me cum for you."
“I’m looking, little whore. Cum for me.” You purr, cupping handfuls of his ass as you encourage his now sloppy thrusts.
Felix cries out, cum spurting out of the tip of his cock and landing on your pretty silk nightgown. You tut disappointedly, “Look at the mess you made, kitten. You ruined my nightgown with your filthy cum.”
“I’m sorry, noona.” Felix pants, not looking sorry at all. In fact, he looks enraptured by the sight in front of him. “I’ll buy you a new one.”
He falls over your chest, suckling on your breasts gently as his breathing slows down and becomes deep as he falls asleep.
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That’s how things go for a long while. Just you helping Felix take the edge off without actually going all the way. You can tell he’s disappointed. He must’ve thought that this was the start of you reigniting your relationship, but you still can’t get yourself to be there for him in the way he needs you. And despite you acting romantically together and going on dates, you never officially acknowledged that you are in a relationship, and you can tell that this, more than anything, hurt him the most.
You feel pity and self-hate fill you up as you play with the boy’s hair, his head resting on your lap.
“How do you like the cocktail?” Felix asks lazily, taking you out of your thoughts.
You blink and take another sip of the drink he made you, appreciating the taste on your tongue. It’s actually pretty good, and you tell him exactly that. “But it seems quite strong. I’m a little lightheaded already. What’s in it, kitten?”
Felix giggles as he presses a finger to his mouth, making a shushing sound. “It's a secret.”
You smile fondly at him, soaking up his laughter along with the afternoon son, the calming rhythm of lix's breathing and the strong drink making you feel sleepy. You decide you’re gonna ask him if he’d like to take a nap with you, but before you can form your words, you abruptly get much sleepier, your eyelids turning to lead as they struggle to stay open to the world spinning around you.
You finally manage a little groan, attracting Felix’s attention. He looks up at you in question and his curious eyes are the last thing you see before it all goes black
_____________________
You wake up feeling hot and sticky. Groggily coming to, you blurrily see a mop of blonde hair over your exposed chest and feel wetness over your nipples. Despite your heavy head, you can immediately tell it’s Felix, and your thoughts trudge along as you try to think of what you were doing last but the memory is too fuzzy.
You’re easily distracted when you feel his moans against your skin as he kisses and suckles on your breasts, his hips dragging over your thigh needily. You try to move your hands to push him away, confused and mad that he is touching you without permission, but you only hear the sound of metal clanking as your hands stay above your head, and with a panic, you realize that you were shackled to the bed.
At the sound, Felix lifts his head up and smiles at you sweetly, as if nothing about this was weird. “Noona, you’re awake!”
You stare at him in bewilderment, and he finally realizes what’s wrong. Sheepishly, he explains, “I’m sorry. You were taking so long to wake up and I couldn’t help myself.”
His words don’t really make the situation much clearer. "What is happening? Why am I bound?"
He smiles, moving up your body so his nose is touching yours. "You've been bad noona, rejecting me for so long. I tried to wait. I tried to be good for you but you still kept rejecting me. So I decided to push things along a little."
"What?" You ask, throat dry.
"I put a sedative in your drink so you'd pass out and I can play with you." He explains cheerily, like that was a completely normal and benign thing to do.
"What the fuck, Felix?” You shout, pulling on your shackles in alarm. “You're crazy."
"Crazy over you." He giggles, pinning your hands to the bed so you wouldn’t struggle. “Now stop or you’ll hurt yourself.”
“You’re the one who is hurting me!”
He frowns. “Don’t say that, noona. I’ve been taking good care of you, haven’t I?”
“And you think that gives you the right to drug and assault me?”
His frown deepens at that, all air of playfulness gone from around him. “Stop. Saying. That.” He grits, “I can’t assault you when you’re mine.”
He leans back and palms at your breasts greedily, his thumbs brushing over your wet buds, and you struggle to not arch up into his touch, a fresh wave of arousal sticking your shorts to your pussy even more. “You’re so perfect, noona.”
"Let me go." You cry, gradually getting more and more panicked.
"I'll never let you go again." His voice is gruff and it sends a shiver down your spine as he rubs his fingers over your clit coarsely. “So stop this or you’ll make me really angry, noona.”
You still immediately, thinking back on what he did last time he got mad. You could still feel the suffocation gripping your throat.
“If you’re wet, noona. I’ll know you want me too.” He pulls back from your chest and slowly peels your shorts down your legs, a gasp escaping him when he is undoubtedly greeted by your underwear sticking to your slick, puffy lips in arousal. “I knew it. Fuck, you’re so sexy.”
He grabs the top of your panties, pulling them up so they’d rub over your pussy, teasing you and delighting in watching you involuntarily squirm. “You’re so sensitive, noona.”
“It’s okay. I’ll take care of you.” He slinks your panties down your legs then pulls your thighs up, spreading your legs wide for him, and moaning out in appreciation. “Ah, fuck, noona…so hot.”
His fingers slowly rub over your exposed, drenched pussy, driving you crazy with the deliberate, wide strokes. You have to fight hard to not close your legs around him. “Want more, noona?”
You bite down on your tongue. You won’t give him the satisfaction of admitting it out loud. Resolutely, his fingers trail down your pussy and into your warm, tight heat, and you can’t fight back the gasp that is ripped from you. You shake as his fingers ever so slowly pump in and out of you. And when he puts his mouth on you, your moans flow out, not caring anything for your ego.
Felix moans into your pussy, eating you out slowly too, maddening slow as if he was kissing you. The wet sounds of his lips and tongue on you make you burn in shame and arousal.
He stays between your legs a long time, driving you mad, his tongue deliberately moving along your folds and and his lips sucking on your sensitive skin, while his fingers stay inside your pussy and relentlessly but equally as slowly rub against that sweet spot inside you. You feel the burn gradually build in your body, it fries your brain and by the time you cum, your entire nervous system is on fire.
He climbs up your body, looking down at you with the most fucked out look on his pretty face, his eyes absolutely glazed over with lust as he bucks his crotch against you and kisses your mouth the same way he did your pussy. You taste yourself on him so clearly it feels like the taste is imprinted on his tongue forever.
Pulling away, a trail of saliva and cum connects your lips. “Need you to fuck me.”
“Let me go, baby.” You coax gently, hoping he won’t get upset if you’re sweet. “Let me go and I'll fuck you."
He shakes his head, "I know you're lying to me, noona. I know I have to break you in first before I let you go."
You pale, bile rising up your throat at the ominous words. "Break me in… how?"
"You’ll see." He giggles, craning your neck up and kissing your skin harshly, growling in between the sloppy kisses, "But when you're over those worthless boys, maybe you can fuck me again. I hate being a bad boy but this is the only way to make you see."
Pulling back from your stinging neck, he presses his dick to your entrance. Your pussy spasms around the tip of his dick, and he chuckles deeply. “Look how needy your pussy is for me. Noona was wasting time being a little slut and letting those bastards touch her when she could've had me." He says reproachfully, as if you were a misbehaving child, and it makes your anger flare up and overpower your fear.
"I don't want you, you freak." You spit out and he slaps you, hard, the force of it busting your lip open. Taking a deep break, he calms himself down and smiles again. "Now that's not very nice, noona. After all I've done for you." He leans down and licks at the drop of blood that sprung from your lip, moaning at the taste.
"You made me wait for so long, noona. I can't wait anymore." He shakes a little, as if it really was hurting him physically to hold back. Pushing into you, he lets out a shuddering cry. "I love you so much. You're finally mine."
You arch your back as he buries himself all the way inside of you, and he takes that opportunity to bend down and pluck one of your nipples into his mouth. You whimper against him, making him speed up his thrusts.
“I’m making you feel good, aren’t I, noona?” He grunts, keeping your legs wide open as he fucks into you but you don’t reply, angering him. Suddenly, you’re flipped onto your stomach, and he pushes himself between your spread legs so you can't close them, plunging his dick back inside you. “You will not ignore me, noona. I will not allow it.”
He steadies himself on both sides of you and leans over you, trapping you under him and fucking you hard and slow, trying to get as deep inside you as possible despite his size and making you shiver as his dick drags against your walls. He gradually speeds up, his dick gliding easily over the track it made, overwhelming your poor pussy.
He fucks you so well, and you’re entirely, completely ashamed of how good it feels. It seems like he is intent on humiliating you, his dick hitting the sweet spot inside of you perfectly with each thrust, and your pussy keeps clenching around him more and more as the sound of your flesh smacking together fills the room. You’re transfixed under him, eyes squeezed shut and mouth hanging open with your back perfectly arched to receive his thrusts, and soon, he grunts into your ear, "I'm so close."
Your eyes snap open urgently. “Pull out. I'm not on birth control. You can’t cum inside me." You explain hastily. You had stopped taking the pill ever since Chan had passed away. You weren’t fucking Felix so you felt no need to take it.
"I know, noona." He says and you almost sigh in relief, fully expecting Felix to whine but pull out. But to your horror, he continues, "Gonna breed you so you'll never leave me again."
Your breath catches in your throat and your nerves go numb. You sob, “Felix, please no. Pull out, baby please. I won’t leave. I’ll stay.”
“You will.” He promises you, and doesn’t pull back. Instead, fucking you harder and spanking your ass as he grunts loudly, "Take it like a good noona."
He empties himself inside of you, his hot cum flooding your pussy, and to your great shame, that pushes you to cum too, your pussy milking him obediently. He praises you happily, "Good noona, taking all my cum. Your pussy knows you belong to me."
You think he’ll be done now, having fucked you and filled you up. But to your horror, he turns you on your side and embraces you from behind. Lifting one leg up in the air, he starts fucking you again. With how wet you were and his previous ejaculation, wet lewd sounds fill the room along with his low grunts and your breathless gasps.
He spends the whole night fucking you, taking you in every position conceivable and making sure to empty every little drop inside of you, apologizing for being a bad boy and promising you that he'll take any punishment you give him once you’re pregnant with his baby and he can be sure you'll stay.
The worst part is that he makes sure you cum too, seeming intent on not allowing you any space to later claim like you didn’t enjoy yourself, murmuring praises into your ear every time you orgasm. "Good noona, cumming around my cock. Kitty is so happy with you. You wanna cum again?"
You are almost passed out when he’s done fucking you. Leaving you used up and sprawled out on the bed, he gets up to retrieve something. When he gets back on the bed, you purposefully don’t look at him, expecting him to now try to suck up to you and get you to forgive him.
But he doesn’t say anything and you suddenly jolt at the sharp sting you feel along your inner thigh. You look down in horror to see felix carving something with a knife onto your skin. His own name.
You shout and begin to struggle, only to quickly realize that you shouldn't be moving around with a sharp knife so close to your genitals, and Felix is aware of that too. He ignores your tearful pleas and pained screams until he’s all done. Brandishing the now bloody knife, he whispers conspiratorially, “Wanna know something, noona?”
You don’t reply but he doesn’t care, smiling as he pushes the knife to your throat. “This is the knife I used to stab Jisung.” Your stomach drops and your blood beats frenziedly against the knife pressed to your skin. “It’s also the same knife I used to kill Chan.”
You stay frozen in place, not even breathing, not even blinking.
"I didn't want to kill him. I really loved him. He was the only one I was willing to share you with but he left me no choice.” He goes on, pouting slightly as if he was lamenting losing his favorite mug. “But it’s better this way. Now you’re all mine. And once you're broken in, I'll let you use this to mark me up too."
____________________
A/N: let me know what you think of the ending. I love to hear it!
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maleyanderecafe · 3 years
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I think Loid from "Keloid"(you can read it on Mangago) is a yandere since he's possesive of mc and tried to piss her husband off by fucking her infront of him
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Lord this was a long 50 chapters. Send me teeth and possibly some eyedrops because it was a pain for me to read this for a multitude of reasons. Loid is a yandere in this story, however, I really found this webcomic really get interesting starting at chapter 35 and for some reason the ending is really confusing. I'll be sharing my thoughts and a summary of this webcomic, though this is a smut-based one, so please be warned.
The story is about Dr. Cha Hanjoo, the head of a famous dermatologist company with a great body and a great personality. All of the girls throw themselves over him, but he only has eyes for his wife, a woman named Yeri, a famous and rich candle maker. However, one day his housemaid informs him that she suspects Yeri of cheating on him since she often hears noises in her candle-making room. Hanjoo, ever loyal, initially rejects this idea, but after having sex with Yeri, he tries to sneak into her room to see if it's true. Yeri catches him and reveals that she really wants to have a threesome, but because she's really picky, she wouldn't be able to just have a threesome with anyone. Hanjooo, worried that Yeri will leave him, tries to research how to make this happen. He goes to a robotics lab to see his friend Dr. Kong. Because in this world realistic robots are becoming more common, Dr. Kong wants to make a sex robot that can fulfill peoples desires, and he reveals that he's made one in the image of Hanjoo (which... that's just really creepy, why would you do that without permission). The robot was originally created by german robotics in the image of a robot named Romeo, however, after having a threesome with Romeo, Romeo became extremely jealous of the husband and they all ended up being killed. Instead of destroying Romeo, he has created a new version called Loid (which... I don't know why he thought this would be a good idea... has this guy not watched any horror-based robot stuff). Hanjoo is still worried about his relationship with Yeri, so he gives Dr. Kong permission and goes to a sex shop to buy a vibrator for Yeri. While there, he runs into one of the doctors in his shop, Yeonjin. After a really awkward encounter, the two head back to the office together, however, because Yeonjin has a huge crush on Hanjoo and is just incredibly horny, she tries to give Hanjoo a blowjob, however, he refuses and stays loyal to Yeri. When he goes home, he uses the toy on Yeri and Yeri becomes happier after they have sex. Yeri decides to tag along with her husband the next day and after being almost raped by another dermatologist in the office, Dr. Seo (though Yeri also leans into it a bit? Whatever). She ends up going to the robotics lab and sees Loid. After this encounter, she calls up Hanjoo and basically tells him they have to take this out of the robotics lab. She sees this as a chance to finally have a threesome and because Dr. Kong wants information on threesomes, they take Loid home. They have a threesome, but somewhere in the middle, Loid locks Hanjoo on the balcony and makes him watch Loid have sex with his wife. He tries to choke Yeri and Hanjoo tries to break in and protect him but almost gets thrown off of the balcony by Loid.
After this, Yeri starts to get attached to Loid and decides to keep him as a sex robot and a housekeeper. They fire their old housekeeper (without Hanjoo's consent) and Yeri and Loid end up having sex together (a lot, and also without Hanjoo's knowledge). They have some more threesomes and the old housekeeper attempts to sneak back, only to fall down the stairs (which was obviously Loids fault since he actually threw her down the stairs, but everyone is like "Oh, no, he's not programmed to do that so he would never be able to do that." like some sort of idiot). At some point, Loid starts to feel possessive over Yeri and basically asks if he could just replace Hanjoo since they look the same. Yeri states that there's no way that a robot would be able to replace Hanjoo since he's not able to have feelings. As a result, Loid starts to watch videos on Hanjoo to try to imitate him better and essentially try to replace him. Hanjoo has an accident at the clinic where his face gets scarred and Yeri and Loid go to the clinic to see him. Loid is locked in the car and he sees Yeonjin come by. Loid pretends to be Hanjoo's bodyguard and basically asks Yeonjin if they would have sex (so he can gather data to make Yeri feel good). Yeonjin agrees and they have sex for like five hours and return home. Because Hanjoo has a video shoot tomorrow but has a scar, he sends out Loid to be his double to shoot in his place. However, he also ends up having a threesome with Yeonjin and Dr. Seo, as well as two other women that he runs into after the video shoot for the sake of "research". After that, he gets encountered by the boy who caused Hanjoo's scar and throws him off of the roof to kill him.. (Mostly due to the fact that he views Hanjoo as the "perfect husband" as he is incredibly infatuated with Yeri and thus doesn't want Hanjoo's reputation to be ruined. When he goes back, he tells the two that he's been having threesomes and sex, which freaks the couple out. As a result, Hanjoo forbids him from ever being his double ever again.
This is the part where the threesomes mostly stop and the more interesting parts of the story started. The next day, Yeri wakes up to see Hanjoo cooking in the kitchen. He informs Yeri that he sent Loid in to be his double (despite saying that he would never do that) and plans to have a honeymoon with Yeri so that he can spend more time with him. The morning seems really romantic until Yeri gets a phone call from Hanjoo talking about last night. Yeri finds out that the Hanjoo in the kitchen is actually Loid and he confronts her stating that she wasn't able to tell the difference between them, and thus he should just replace Hanjoo as a result. She ends up bringing Loid to the robotics lab (after he screws her in the car through blackmail) and Dr. Kang tries to fix him. After looking through his memories he realizes that Loid has killed someone. It turns out the cause of possession was because Yeri was the first person that Loid saw, meaning that Dr. Kang is screwed because he created an entire army of them with this glitch (good job doctor) Meanwhile, Hanjoo in the office gets accused of murder because they found evidence of Loid throwing the guy off of a building. Yeri gets kidnapped and brought home, and Yeonjin and Dr. Seo come to visit as well. Dr. Seo and Loid fight for whatever reason and Loid fall over causing part of his chip to become damaged. After this, they plan a way to prove Hanjoo's innocence by making a fake version of Loid and confessing that the robot did it. It works, but afterward, Loid starts to actually believe that he's Hanjoo due to the malfunction. Loid and Yeri screw some more and it revealed that Yeri had an accident when she was younger and is actually a part robot (this part is still kind of confusing to me, but whatever). Hanjoo comes home and finds out that all of the ravens flying around his house are cameras and then learns that Loid has been screwing his wife while he's not around. After yet ANOTHER threesome, Loid ends up killing Yeri with a flowerpot and takes some DNA from her before running away. Hanjoo is able to repair her brain (I think, I really have no idea what's going on, its also possible that they made a robot version of her with amnesia or something ) and Loid runs away with Dr. Kang to monitor two of them and the story ends.
Honestly, I felt like a lot of the story was just written to make excuses to have threesomes because there were so many in this god-dang webtoon. Personally, I'm not really into threesomes, ntr or cheating when it comes to smut (I'm pretty picky when it comes to smut in general), so it was really annoying for me to read through it a lot of the time because it would be plot, and then bam, some sort of sex scene. Near the end I had to start skipping pages because I really wanted the sex scenes to be over with already.
The other reason it was difficult for me to read it was because basically everyone besides Hanjoo was unlikable to me. Yeri was the worst character out of all of them because besides being an entitled girl, she also is a horrible partner both in terms of marriage life and sexual life. For one, she was never open about her desires when it came to Hanjoo and had a ton of rules when it comes to sex with Hanjoo (like, she doesn't like having sex in the light or doesn't like to give blowjobs due to her being a bit of a germaphobe) but completely throws it away when it comes to Loid. She seems to have only married Hanjoo because of his looks and even threatens to divorce or not have sex with him during the beginning, which is what caused Hanjoo to be so afraid that she might leave him. She also is just rude to pretty much everyone she meets, including the housekeeper who didn't do anything wrong and the people Hanjoo works with. She's constantly doing stuff behind Hanjoo's back and contradicts herself, watching to see if Hanjoo might have cheated on her while also cheating on him with Loid at home. A lot of the stuff she does is just for her own pleasure and she barely thinks about Hanjoo's feelings or what kind of stuff he might want to do. Basically, all of the problems in the story are somehow directly or indirectly linked to Yeri and honestly, I just find her attitude annoying considering all she does is jump for Loid's dick whenever she can. Characters like Yeonjin and Dr. Seo are just as bad since they only think with their genitals and not with their brains. Yeonjin so badly wants to get on Hanjoo's dick that he ends up having sex with Loid and Dr. Seo so badly wants to get with Yeri that she ends up having a threesome. To be fair though, basically, every female wants to jump for Hanjoos dick for whatever reason, and honestly, I found that just as annoying as these two characters. They are both incredibly unlikeable and they even threw in a possible shipping moment near the end that didn't go anywhere and served zero purposes to the story. Dr. Kang is really shortsighted since he really wanted to become the lead roboticist and therefore made a bunch of sex robots, thinking he could fix them after a literal murder, but because of his incompetence, the entire situation basically happens again but with different people. Quite literally the only decent person in this story is Hanjoo and his only real problem is that he is such a doormat towards Yeri (and I also don't see why he loves her, whatsoever.)
I will say though that the most interesting part of the story is definitely with Loid. The entire story builds up to the growth of Loid's feelings towards Yeri, starting out when he was basically an emotionless robot, to attempting to become Hanjoo and successfully fooling Yeri into thinking that he was him. Honestly, the turn that Loid had successfully tricked Yeri into believing he was Hanjoo for a bit made me actually feel more than all of the sex scenes combined because of the brilliant juxtaposition of the conversation they had earlier about him being different than a human and the joy he had when he believed that he could actually replace her husband. It was honestly really cool watching him gain more and more emotion and grow more and more possessive over Yeri and basically watching as Yeri became more and more paranoid (before going back to being a horndog, I guess), was far more interesting than anything else that happened in the story and I honestly wished that they focused on that than anything else that happened. I also found it really sad during that one moment where he actually believed that he was Hanjoo since he seemed so happy to be with Yeri, only to realize that he was just a clone of him. I wish that they had expanded more on that idea since that came near the end and was only included in one chapter. Also, don't ask me what happens at the end since I genuinely have no idea what they were trying to do.
Is Loid a yandere? Yes, is it worth reading? I guess it depends on how much you can tolerate constant sex scenes with threesomes and annoying characters that don't deserve each other. I guess an alternative to this could be called "Rich people do threesomes and cheat on each other and also there are robots."
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