#going on the list of things i hope to do at some point in my life. alongside roller derby.

[mxstellatayte]

Thoughts on if the drivers would use toys ( and what kind) on themselves and their partners?

ok i could only come up with a mtl for this one so here we goooooooo!

nsfw under the cut <3 minors please do not interact!

🧡lando norris

oh my god this man is SUCH A WHOREEE. he's actually the first person to bring it up in your relationship, and he doesn't so much bring it up as it brings itself up. the two of you and some other drivers and their partners are out after monaco, and something seems off about him, but you don't realize exactly what it is until you're grinding your ass on him on the dance floor and he is very, very hard. when you ask what's going on, he can barely say it without moaning because every move of your hips against his, making his own move in turn, nudges the plug he'd put in before leaving just barely against his prostate. safe to say that later that night, lando was a whining mess, gripping the sheets and head thrown back while you fold him in half with the strap he'd bought a few weeks prior in hopes of this exact situation happening buried in his ass. (got a little carried away there OOPSIES)

🩶george russell

george is actually a bit of a wild card on this list. his preference for toys leans a bit more towards the pain and restraint side of them, but he doesn't mind the occasional plug or vibrator. his own kinks make their appearance when you run up to him after a good race, kiss him, and press your hands to his chest so he can set his hands on your hips the way he likes to. what you aren't expecting, though, is for the outside of your left hand to brush something hard and plastic and for george to *whimper* into the kiss. that slut had worn nipple clamps during the race. his personal favorite combination of toys is having his hands cuffed to the headboard, completely unable to fight you off as you have your merry way with him. (as long as he gets a pat on the head and a shoulder rub with his favorite body lotion and cuddles afterwards ofc <3)

🧡oscar piastri

oscar is the flip of a coin. he's more than happy to quickly tie your wrists together with his tie if you're being a brat at an event or take his time lacing together a beautiful, intricate shibari harness to keep you in place while he uses your mouth to get himself off. when he takes the time for shibari, he'll take a lot of photos of you, maybe even a few videos to use later when he's halfway across the globe. as for toys on himself, he mainly only goes for a simple fleshlight (or lando). surprisingly, one thing he enjoys is laying back blindfolded and letting you have your way with him, as long as you aren't too mean.

🩶lewis hamilton

lewis has a very "if you're down, i'm down" attitude about most things when it comes to sex. as long as the two of you are comfortable and enjoying it, he's game on for a lot of stuff! his hard nos when it comes to toys on himself and his partner are anything that could potentially put one of you in danger or anything even vaguely involving animals. the first time you two really start exploring the world of sex toys of all sorts, he's constantly checking in with you, making sure you're feeling good, and if you tap out at any point, the aftercare is amazing bc he feels bad </3

🩵logan sargeant

oh this man LOVES fucking and getting fucked, and if there's toys involved, he's even happier. i can imagine him sending you a new toy when a big event happens that he can't be there for, and, to make up for it, he buys it for you so that you can fuck over the phone that night. he absolutely loves watching you fuck yourself with anything- your fingers, a toy, even using him to get yourself off is hot as hell to him. i also can't get the thought of him tied up in shibari with a ball gag in his mouth as you tease the fuck out of him, fucking his ass with a dildo that might be bordering on too big and jerking him off slowly at the same time (bonus points if it's in front of a mirror so he can see what a mess of himself he's making 🫣)

💙daniel ricciardo

the first time you bring up the idea of toys with danny, youre both high on the beach outside cancun over winter break, talking about all the random things two high adults talk about, and the topic of him eating you out feels. you passingly mention how much you love it when he moans while he's attached to your clit, and the idea of getting you a vibrator sparks in his mind. when you're in bed that night, the high long gone, he asks you just that, and you're so close to sleep that, when you wake up the next morning, you aren't sure if you remember what happened properly the previous night. you did, in fact, remember correctly, and when you get back to australia, there's a package laying on your bed. "happy late christmas baby xx -danny" inside is a baby pink suction vibrator that you cum with three times, saving a voice memo and texting it to him after you're done catching your breath.

💛charles leclerc

this goes without saying, but charles is more than happy to spend hours between your legs if he could. he's such a pleasure dom that sometimes you have to pull him away from your clit by his hair, and fuck if that sight alone doesn't prep you for another hour of his tongue ravishing you, you don't know what will. his cheeks, lips, chin, even the tip of his nose are shiny with a mix of your cum and his saliva, his pupils are wide and his mouth hangs open, breath heavy and fanning against you so perfectly. when you being up the idea of using toys, he's over the moon. when he finds out the toys you had in mind are ones you can wear to ferrari events under your dress, the remote hiding perfectly in the pocket of his pants? shit, he's on neptune.

🩵alex albon

what is it with the williams drivers being sub leaning? alex is similar to lewis in having the "if you're down, i'm down" attitude, and he's just as focused on his partner's pleasure as he is his own. he's the first to bring it up in the relationship, asking (very very shyly) if you'd maybe possibly under no pressure whatsoever be willing to try pegging him, and when his eyes light up when you agree, you have a feeling toys are going to start being a semi-regular addition to your sex life. on the occasion that neither of you have any (or you simply don't have the time or effort), alex is more than willing to have you ride him or fuck you himself, because i do think that, if teased enough, alex will top purely out of spite.

💙yuki tsunkda

yuki's idea of toys is much more unconventional. it could be your pillow when the two of you are fucking over the phone, the armrest of the couch in his driver's room, or your favorite dildo or vibrator. he's honestly kinda cool with most stuff, as long as it makes you feel good and is safe. as for himself, his favorite is a cock ring around him while you ride him, so that way you're both getting the best of it while he can still hold on to your tits :D he also tied your wrists together one time with a ribbon from the gift he got you for your two year anniversary and he still keeps the ribbon in his nightstand to remind him of you on nights when he's especially lonely.

❤️max verstappen

really, really prefers to fuck you himself in whatever way he can. whether he's fucking you into the mattress with his dick or sending you to heaven with his tongue and fingers or making you ride his thigh because you were being a little brat, he just loves the feeling of your skin on his. if you're being especially bratty, though, he will not hesitate to make you fuck yourself but of course you won't get to cum... why would he let you do that when you've been a brat? no, it's nearing overstimulation and tears running down your face begging for him to let you cum from the toy before he even considers giving you the release of fucking you himself.

🩷pierre gasly

pierre is a fluffy little fluff boy. just. the actual sweetest in bed. he prefers to be able to feel you himself rather than adding a toy to the mix, but if you're just really, really turned on while you're not around and feel like messing with him you'll send him a video of you fucking yourself with your favorite toy and it gets him so riled up he has to stop whatever he's doing and run to the motorhome so he can deal with his boner lol

💛carlos sainz

carlos is a very hands-on guy. he doesn't really go for dedicated toys per se, leaning more towards shoving your panties in your mouth or tying your wrists together with his tie. sometimes he doesn't even need that, though- sometimes his hand is more than enough to cover your mouth or hold your wrists together if there's no other option.

🤍nico hülkenberg

like carlos, he's very hands-on with you. the only real "toys" he uses with you are blindfolds and ribbons to hold your wrists in place. one time, he tried handcuffing you to the bed but seeing the marks on your wrists scared him so he threw them away after that :((

drivers i think just wouldn't be into toys very much, if at all:

valtteri bottas, fernando alonso, zhou guanyu

intentionally excluded: checo, lance, kmag, ocon

[mylifestylearedilfs]

⇢ ˗ˏˋ joost klein x tinder date!reader ࿐ྂ

ੈ✩‧₊˚ OCEAN EYES : mention of sex (but no smut) fluff ; use of alcohol ; imagine ; all is fictional ; english is not my first language

, , ,

_________ ׂׂૢ་༘࿐ CREATING AN ACCOUNT on tinder wasn’t on your to do list, but after another failed attempt on meet your future ‘husband’ in real life, you decided to seek luck at this app. after choosing your best pictures, you set your profile with hope that you wouldn’t have to text with all of those weirdos that probably were on this site, asking themselves why i don’t have girlfriend?

you honestly couldn’t understand people (mostly the whole alfa men) on this kind of platforms, where they acted like they’re better than everyone else, but in reality they wouldn’t even say ‘hi’ to you. also what’s the point of having a dating app, if you can’t even properly ask the other person to date. you personally hated texting, it was the worst way to communicate, because you weren’t able to show your emotions clearly and it was easier to misunderstand the intentions.

you tried to ignore all suspicious looking people, but you lose hope, when even people your type were weird or impolite towards you. you were close to just delete app and forget about everything that happened. but then you received some kind of ‘super like’ from very good looking blonde man, the first thing that caught your attention was his bright blue eyes. how ironic, you thought. blonde hair and blue eyes, if he were a girl, he definitely would be miss universe. but god knew that he would be too powerful if he was a woman.

before you even checked his profile, you saw that he already messaged you. he already had big plus, because it was usually you who needed to start a conversation.

‘you & me, beer in an hour?’ okay, he definitely was really straightforward but you couldn’t tell that you didn’t liked it.

‘okay’

it was an irresponsible decision, but you couldn’t care less right now. you were truly tried of the endless conversations about nothing, you needed some adrenaline in your life. and even if it turn out that he’s a murderer, you will have an interesting story to tell your future kids — of course if you will survive in that scenario.

, , ,

it was almost twenty minutes after the set time, but you still waited like a fool, because you were curious if you were just scammed at this point. when your second cigarette started to slowly gutter out, you checked your phone to see if he tried to inform you about his lateness, but as you thought — nothing. you were honestly irritated that you couldn’t met a proper guy, not even for a relationship but just good sex, apparently you just missed to have someone close, in physical and mental way.

fuck it. you said to yourself and deleted this stupid dating app, right after you did that, you heard someone’s calling your name. before you turned around, you throw out a cigarette.

“i get it that i’m late, but you don’t have to ignore me” you saw the blonde guy in front of you, with two bottles of wine in his hands and two beer cans in his jeans pockets.

“so your real miss universe, nice to meet you” you said with a bit of irony in your voice, and he just laughed, giving you bootle of alcohol.

“or maybe i’m just in your imagination, guess we will never know” he said with smile, and you realised that he loved to laugh a lot, but honestly that was exactly what you needed now. some positive energy. “but now let’s go, shall we?”

, , ,

at first it was supposed to be quick meeting to get each other better and then probably forget about the existence of each other. but to your surprise it turned out that you were sitting in some sketchy looking place with joost for almost four hours already, and the fun only began.

you couldn’t believe that your perfect type of person was right in front of you and he was interested in you, which was the most unbelievable part. he was the first person that could make you laugh only by saying something random, or maybe it was because you were under the influence of weed, that you just smoked. either way his ability to turn every little thing into a joke was hilarious and you simply loved it.

suddenly you both became silent, but it wasn’t uncomfortable for you, which was also something new. all you could hear was the sound of wind and some other birds but you decided to interrupt the silence.

“you want to come to my place?” you said without thinking twice, well. . . let’s be honest your brain wasn’t working at all at the moment.

“to do what?” he looked at you with his typical smirk, sipping his beer.

“obviously to play monopoly” you said sarcastically, but underneath you had a little smile. “i want you to fuck me” you added and he seemed to be taken aback with your directness, as he watched you getting up.

“so you’re coming or i will need to please myself on my own?” you said, walking slowly in the direction of your house.

“you don’t need to tell me twice” he quickly said and you just chuckled as you felt his hands on your waist.

that was a great match, for sure.

, , ,

⇢ ˗ˏˋ thank you for attention! hope you liked it!

[harrywavycurly]

Secret Rendezvous Part 19: Good Idea

Masterlist: Here

CW: Language

Tag List: @emma-munson @aol19 @tlclick73 @prestinalove @kailey-firefly @fromasgardandback @therealgothamguardianfr @peaches-roses-sins @hiscrimsonangel @furiousladyking @angelina16torres-blog @sofaritsalrightt @josephquinnsfreckles @starrywhitenight @mrsjellymunson @witchwolflea @jasminelafleur @ohmeg @comeonatmebruh @missmarch-99 @arthurcerverogf @disassociationdive @123iloveyou456 @perplexing-vex

A/N: This takes place the same day as part 18, and the next part is the last one for this series and I’m sad but I know y’all will love it✨

“Jesus I’ve been looking everywhere for you…why are you out here?” “I was hoping to be alone…what do you need Emerson?” “I need you to tell me why you thought asking her to fucking prom was a good idea when the two of you haven’t talked in-” “Chrissy said I needed to show her I didn’t give a fuck about what other people think about us being together so why wouldn’t I ask her to prom? That’s…what…normal couples do isn’t it? Go to dances and shit?” “Uh yeah Eddie key word there is couples…you two aren’t even friends!” “We are now…we talked about it at lunch today…” “Oh…well that’s….that’s good.” “She hasn’t listened to the tape yet…thinks it was fucking Henry who gave it to her.” “Yeah she’s going to figure it out pretty quickly it wasn’t him…assuming you actually sing the songs right? Or did you just-” “Yes I actually sang the songs I’m not going to half ass this shit…I can’t risk fucking it up again…” “So…you love her don’t you?” “What?” “Oh come on man you asked her to prom with a mixtape of songs you covered yourself…you totally fucking love her.” “Okay…and what if I do?” “Uhm…you should tell her.” “I’ll wait and see how she feels after listening to the tape…did you know she was co Captain of the cheerleading squad?” “Yeah…I saw it on her jacket she wears on game days.” “Oh…I guess I never noticed…” “there’s a lot of shit you don’t notice about her…but If you’re serious about wanting to be in a relationship with her and if you’re in love with her you gotta get better at just…being interested in the things she’s into.” “I know…I uh actually watch her perform sometimes at the games I just don’t sit in the stands.” “That’s not creepy at all…” “fuck off…I just…I’m going to try and be there for more things when…or if…she even wants me there…she could really tell me to go fuck myself and I wouldn’t blame her.” “I doubt she’ll tell you that…but I’m glad you’ve finally come to your senses because it was hard watching you fuck this up so badly…” “yeah?” “Yeah it was like watching a car wreck in slow motion…totally brutal.” “Well you could’ve tried to stop it at any point ya know?” “Uh I did try…but you’re so stubborn you just refused my help…but look at you now man…hiding from the girl you’re in love with outside under the bleachers…” “that’s what some people would call progress.” “Exactly….I’ll uh let you have your alone time now but uhm…really don’t let too much time go by before you tell her how you feel okay?” “Yeah I won’t…don’t worry.” “Oh please…you two manage to get into these weird fucking scenarios and all I can do is worry.” “Emerson…get outta here before I kick your ass…” “Right…leaving now…see you later Eddie.”

[agirlwithglam]

Do you ever feel sick and don't feel like doing anything when the day before you told yourself you were going to do a glow up, live always the best ecc..?

yes definitely! unless i'm actually sick and incapable of doing anything, i will at least try. you didn't ask for advice, but here we go anyways. when i feel like that, heres a few things i do:

how to do things when you don't feel like doing them: (from personal experience)

believe that you can do anything. dont roll your eyes at me! dont skip this part either. this is the main point that gets me going every single time. i truly believe that i can do anything, that i am capable of literally anything that i want to achieve. if i want it, i will have it. that is the first mindset you must have when it comes to this.

start small/ make it fun. yes, ofc i said this. if you can't do a full 1 hour workout, do some pushups/squats/lunges and go for a bike ride or a walk with a friend. what i do when im going bike riding with a friend is we go to a mall and buy drinks there! so make it fun! adding friends to whatever you need to do certainly makes it fun. another thing you can do is if you need to read, you can create a cosy spot in your room with scented candles and a little snack and everything and sit and read there. just the idea of it gets me excited!

treat yourself like a project/ robot. now THIS is something that has certainly gotten my some discipline. we as humans have emotions and feelings and moods. sometimes we don't wanna do stuff, and we actually cave into that. if you promised yourself that you would change your life, switch off your emotions and moods. treat yourself like a robot or an "apprentice" that you're training to become the best.

reward yourself! so you can either reward the action (like reading or studying) or the outcome (like finishing a book or getting a high mark on a test). decide what works the best for you. example: you don't wanna study? you can either a) reward yourself for studying with some free time with friends or watching your fav show or b) you can reward your self by the score you get on the test (ex if you got higher than 80%= a certain thing on your wish list, above 90%= a better thing on your wish list, 100%= the thing you've wanted for ages) you don't wanna read? you can either.. a) reward yourself for reading for x amount of minutes or b) you can reward yourself for finishing a book in a certain amount of time.

alter egosss. i know, i mention this quite often, but trust me this actually gives such a burst of emotion! embody someone else/ a different version of you that can best handle the situation. im gonna make a whole post on alter egos soon cus i mention it in a lot of my posts.

thats it for now! i hope this helped <3

btw heres a big master-post to how to get things done when you dont want to (not by me)

[planetahmane]

So I made a list of all the questions I got yesterday only answering those here they are.

What are 3 things you’d say shaped you into who you are? Anime, The Science Channel, and people watching.

What made you start your blog? My crush at the time had one how could I not.

What do you consider to be romance? Romance, to me, is a journey of learning, balancing, and synchronizing with your partner. It’s a dance that evolves and deepens over time, creating a timeless connection and ultimately becoming one. This ongoing, dynamic process is what makes love enduring and beautiful.

What’s some good advice you want to share? Your greatest strength lies in self-awareness. You are both the sculptor and the clay. Shape yourself with intention and care in what you consume—what you watch, listen to, read, who you hang out with, everything—and you will find that your dreams become reality, as if destiny itself had planned it.

Do you believe in ghosts and/or aliens? I absolutely believe in ghosts and aliens, and I hope they believe in me too.

Favourite things about the night? My favorite thing about the night is the transition. When night falls, it makes the day feel like a dream, and when day breaks, the night feels like a dream.

Are you a spiritual person? Yes, I am a spiritual person. For me, spirituality means connection. I don't need a why when I have because.

Fave season and why? Spring is my favorite season, though fall is a close second. I love the transitions they represent, and spring wins because it's getting warmer.

Fave colour and why? My favorite color is cyan. I'm not sure why, but there's just something cool about it.

Any nicknames? I'm not sure if it counts as a nickname, but I typically go by Neo as a username.

Do you collect anything? Not intentionally, no.

What do you do when you’re sad? When I'm sad, I find solace in a particular composition that is cathartic, allowing me to immerse deeply in my thoughts and emotions.

Any hobbies? My hobbies include gaming, reading, programming, learning, writing poetry, and exploring philosophy.

Any pet peeves? Yes, I have a pet peeve about people saying 'thank you' for things that should be a given. It feels insincere, unnecessary, and diminishes the phrase's value. Unfortunately, it's become too ingrained at this point.

Are you an open book or do you have walls up? I would say I am largely an open book, but the table of contents is missing and there is no index. You just have to ask the right questions.

[acheemient]

Things I think Will happen in Season 3 (it's not spoilers if it hasn't happened yet!):

Crowley takes up the roll of Duke of Hell.

Aziraphale was put into the role of Supreme Archangel so Metatron could keep an eye on him/get him out of the way/control him

God has been removed from the Book of Life or has been trapped or whatever by Metatron since the Not Apocalypse (hence no God narration in season 2)*

Crowley was a high ranking Archangel who Fell when he went to Metatron with questions. Crowley's memories have been erased (Duh)

Nina and Maggie will be back

Crowley dies in Aziraphale's arms, but Az is able to miracle him back from the dead (foreshadowed in season 2 by the whole "Lazuri" measuring system)

Crowley tells Aziraphale, "I forgive you," at some point**

Ineffable Husbands retire to a cottage in South Downs (because Neil loves us and will do right by us)

A Nightingale will sing outside the cottage and will be the last image we see.

Things I think Might happen in Season 3:

Crowley HATES being Duke of Hell, but he does it to spite Aziraphale

Aziraphale HATES being Supreme Archangle, but he pretends he's Fine. Lots of fake smiles

The Second Coming is a baby, and the Ineffable Husbands have to deal with keeping a baby safe from both sides

The Them come back to help save the day

Aziraphale brings Crowley back to life with a very tearful kiss **

Ineffables free God/bring Her back/add her back to the Book of Life somehow

God narrates the ending scene of the Ineffable Husbands living happily ever after, now that She has been freed/brought backby the Ineffables

The Ineffable Husbands end up raising baby Second Coming as their own in their cottage (throw back to them raising the fake Antichrist).

Thinks I Want to happen in Season 3:

So many kisses (I think we will get one, maybe two) between the Ineffable Husbands

A Big Hug between Aziraphale and Crowley (I'm taking about Embrace levels)

Crowley sarcastically bowing to Aziraphale and addressing him as "Supreme Archangel"

Adam still has some of his Infernal Powers. Nothing like before, but some left over

The return of Anathema, but I think her story is done, so this is less likely

A sex scene or an allusion to sex (but it won't happen, so don't worry - see below)

The last scene shows Aziraphale, Crowley, and the Second Coming in their garden outside the cottage in South Downs living as a happy little family.

Things I think we Won't see in Season 3:

Coffee Theory ***

Body Swap Theory ***

A sex scene or an allusion to sex between Aziraphale and Crowley (even though I want it, Neil won't bring it up one way or another. He'll let us all make our own choice on that one)

Newt. I just don't see him coming back

These are all just my opinions. Please do not get angry about anything listed above if you don't agree.

* God's Ineffable Plan was always for the Apocalypse to be stopped by Aziraphale and Crowley. Metatron still wants Earth to be destroyed. He wants his war.

**I'm hoping the "I forgive you" is heartfelt. Possibly when Aziraphale kisses Crowley back to life. Imagine Aziraphale holding dying/dead Crowley in his arms, saying, "Pease don't leave me, I need you, please don't go, I'm sorry, I'm so sorry Crowley" (etc.). And then Aziraphale's eyes glow purple as his pulls up every bit of his power and presses his lips firmly to Crowley's lips (much like their first kiss), and we finally see Crowley lift a hand to Aziraphale's cheek to kiss back, and Aziraphale is SHOCKED and pulls away to look at a very weak smiling Crowley who quietly says, "I forgive you."

***I know some people really hang their hats on this one, and no insult to them, but I don't think Aziraphale needed any extra prodding or powers used to get him to go back to Heaven. It's enough that he thinks he's going to be able to make Heaven better and/or protect Crowley. I kind of feel like it cheapens Aziraphale's agency and the story.

[writingquestionsanswered]

Hello, love your work, it helps me so freaking much. Anyhoo, do you have any tips or advice on chapter content? I’m doing somewhat basic outlining and found that many of the conflicts the characters face are resolved in the same chapter it’s introduced in, aside from the main conflict/plot the characters are interacting with. I have not written much as I know if I don’t have a basic outline I’ll get halfway through the draft then start over because I have no idea where I’m going, but could I fix this issue when I get to writing or should I do another more in-depth outline to work out the pacing/conflict kinks?

Thanks so much!

Chapter Conflict vs Story Conflict

Every chapter needs to have a purpose, whether it's moving the story forward, developing characters, delivering backstory, or moving pieces into place for the next big plot point. In any case, whatever your chapter is accomplishing, it will usually be framed around a smaller conflict... or a chapter conflict, so-to-speak. In other words, it's not weird for your chapters to revolve around their own smaller conflicts. What matters is that those smaller conflicts are part of moving the story forward, developing characters, delivering back story, moving the pieces into place for the next big plot point, etc. What you generally don't want is for your chapters to be sort of stand alone "episodes" that revolve around a conflict unrelated to the overall story.

Remember, too, that you can have internal conflict (a problem within the character's heart and mind) and an external conflict (a problem in the character's situation/life/world), and you can also have conflict that's dealt with as a subplot (related to the main plot in a "side quest" sort of way), and the story's overarching conflict. Ultimately, all that matters is it's all connected in some way. You should be able to look at any of the conflict in your story and say it does at least one of the following: moves the overall story forward, moves a subplot forward, develops a character or character relationship, develops the setting, delivers backstory, sets things up for the next big plot point... Otherwise, if you can look at a conflict and say, "If I take this out, it doesn't impact the main story in a significant way," it probably shouldn't be there.

I hope that helps!

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

I’ve been writing seriously for over 30 years and love to share what I’ve learned. Have a writing question? My inbox is always open!

♦ Questions that violate my ask policies will be deleted! ♦ Please see my master list of top posts before asking ♦ Learn more about WQA here

[thorias]

SEASON 2 WISH LIST:

-Madelyne is resurrected as a Horseman along with Gambit: I think there's a better story to tell with Madelyne being brought back (at least temporarily) than staying dead. The X-men having to fight her too would give Cyclops and Cable a more personal stake in this Apocalypse storyline, not that they really needed one, but still...

I said in another post that I wouldn't want to dilute the "Saving Gambit" story by making a bunch of other X-men Horsemen as well, but if it's just Madelyne, then I think it's okay. And I wouldn't expect Madelyne to survive this story anyway, since, aside from tying up a couple loose threads with the Summers family, her arc is basically finished now.

Plus, I just kind of like the idea of giving Deathbit a buddy in the spurned lover department; that could be fun.

-----

-Sabretooth returns. Logan (sans adamantium) has to fight him... and loses: I've always liked the idea that Sabretooth would probably beat Wolverine in a fair fight, (dude is like 3x Logan's size after all) but it's never been a fair fight since the adamantium basically made Logan unstoppable. But take the adamantium away and suddenly Wolverine is the underdog for a change, which makes the match-up a lot more interesting. And what's even the point of doing the bone claws story if it's not to see how Logan deals with being in a weakened state like this?

Granted, I want to see this for selfish reasons since Sabretooth is one of my favorite villains, but come on! Victor is long overdue for a W against Wolverine, and if he can't get it now, then I'm calling BS lol.

-----

-Mystique returns, working for Apocalypse: I think Demayo shot down the Val-Cooper-is-Mystique-in-disguise theory, (correct me if I'm wrong about that) but it would be pretty ridiculous if we didn't see her in season 2 since she worked with Apocalypse in XTAS on multiple occasions.

Plus, there's a ready-made story there with her and Rogue. In the 90s cartoon, Mystique wanted to get Rogue back as her daughter so badly that she was even willing to turn Rogue into a Horseman to do it. So just imagine if Mystique had a hand in convincing Apocalypse to resurrect Remy as Deathbit, or at least helped him pull it off, because she saw this as a way to get back into Rogue's good graces. That would add some really interesting pathos to a story that's already really emotionally charged.

-----

-Costume changes: I get that Marvel has toys to sell, but the different suits the team got in season 1 ain't it. Sorry, they're just not. The only one who pulled it off was Storm. Everyone else got a serious glow down. I actually felt low key embarrassed for Scott and Jean trying to make those retro costumes from the 60s/80s eras work; there's a reason those designs stayed in the past, you guys.

And I even like Rogue's green & white suit in the comics, but in the show it just looked awkward with the gloves being a different shade of green than the rest of it. I'd take just about any of her other costumes over this one.

Either change the suits again or go back to the old versions because I'm not feeling these current ones at all.

-----

-Magneto has a reunion with his kids... and it doesn't go the way he wants: We saw in the season 1 finale that Mags' separation from his children is something that's at least been bothering him, (though not enough for him to lift a finger to save them from being killed along with everyone else on Earth if he succeeded in destroying the planet's electromagnetic field, but I guess we're blaming that on bad writing) so I want him to meet his kids in season 2... only for it to go as horribly as it possibly could.

It would be both ironic and hilarious if Magneto is hoping to patch things up with his kids, only for Pietro and Lorna to try to fight and arrest him the instant they see him (X-Factor doesn't seem to be a thing anymore, but let's say they're still government employees and have the authority to arrest criminals/terrorists) because he did after all murder millions of innocent people in the finale AND try to murder every other living thing on the planet, including them.

I mean, let's not kid ourselves, there's no way this family reunion is going to be a happy one after what he did. SOMEBODY has to hold Magneto accountable for that, and his own children doing it is about the most fitting thing that I can think of.

-----

-A big story arc for Gambit: Romy fans got gipped in season 1, and even if you're just a Gambit fan, you still had to settle for scraps with him only playing a major role in one episode, which coincidentally was the one where he got killed off. Yes, the stage is set for Deathbit to have a really compelling story in season 2, but that's going to depend on how it's done and frankly, after I got burned so many times in the first season, I'm skeptical that the writers will give this the care and attention it deserves.

Demayo said it was "key" that Remy died thinking he didn't deserve to be a hero and that Rogue had chosen Magneto instead of him. These things have gone unaddressed in the show since then, so I'm going to assume they're being saved for the Deathbit story and THE PAYOFF FOR THIS BETTER BE DAMN GOOD.

I want to see all of Remy's low self-esteem, self-loathing and resentment over the Rogneto debacle get twisted into a dark rage that Deathbit throws back in everyone's faces. AJ himself said that Remy didn't feel valued by the X-men or Rogue when he died, so use that! Make it part of the story! Make them own up to it. Force Rogue to confront her own feelings about how she handled that situation, (so far, she's been avoiding doing this) so it can factor into how they bring him back.

I know a lot of us assume that freeing Remy from Apocalypse's influence is going to come down to Rogue finally telling him that she loves him. And, yeah, that should be a big part of it, but it shouldn't be the only part. That's fine as far as Rogue is concerned, but Remy needs an arc too, and I just want it to be worth the wait after they put us through all this.

-----

-Deathbit vs Magneto: This needs to happen. Aside from the fact that Romy fans will have been clamoring for it for a long time, frankly, both characters are going to want it too. Mags will no doubt view Deathbit as the reason why he can't get Rogue back, and Deathbit... well, we all know what his reasons are; he'll likely want to take Magneto apart just for the pure satisfaction of it.

Now since Magneto's so OP, Gambit wouldn't stand much of a chance in a straight fight under normal conditions, but we know Apocalypse evolves/enhances mutants' powers when they become Horsemen, so imagine if he unlocked Gambit's Omega potential, so Remy has his New Son powers now, or at least a heightened version of what he had before. So Magneto goes in brimming with confidence that he's going to wipe the floor with his rival for Rogue's affections, but then in a shocking twist, Deathbit breaks out his newly enhanced power set and turns the tables on him.

Do I really want to see Mags get taken down a peg and humbled by Gambit? Sure. But narratively, this makes a ton of sense to do. Since Demayo loves Magneto so much, I highly doubt it will happen, (certainly not with this outcome at least) but I think it would be super satisfying for fans.

[bro-atz]

everyone asks who bro is, everyone asks where bro is, but no one asks how bro is...

i'm fine btw LMAO i just took a step back because i had some extremely time sensitive and very personal matters to attend to (things i will not talk about so please do not ask), and while i was gone, i realized i was working way too hard on everything here when i have so many other things in my life that are way more important like my job(s), my family, my kids, my physical health— the list goes on. plus, i kept feeling down about myself and about the amount of interactions on my fics, and i had to stop and realize...

i'm working so hard on something that i do for free. something that i once did to make myself happy now feels like a job. i lowkey lost a lot of joy while writing the past couple of fics because it wasn't fun for me anymore, and i hated that feeling. i started this account to write for myself, and i totally forgot that as i felt like i had some sort of obligation to requests, updating regularly, etc.

so, i'm no longer taking requests. i may reopen my soft/hard hours at some point in the future, but i will not be taking any requests from here on out. i want to focus on the fics that i had planned from the very beginning of the creation of this account, and i want to write for myself again because i lost sight of myself.

also, not to get on a heavier note, but i've had multiple people— anons and even people i considered friends— on this site use me, make me feel small, act as if i'm worth absolutely nothing, and so on and so forth, and it made me forget that writing is my main, actual occupation, and that i am a good writer. above all, i'm a human, and i have feelings even if i choose not to express all of them here. just because i'm nice, it's not an invitation to take advantage of me.

and no need to worry— i'll still be here! but i'm going to write for myself from this point on, and i hope that the things my brain births will still pique everyone's interests. thank you <3

[backsideattackkkk]

you hate the columfags so much but I want to hear your thoughtz,,,,Who do you think was dyl's halycon girl?

oh yippie. i've already answered this before, but i like to yap, so thank you anon :]

my main thought is: dylan did not love one girl, he circled around numerous girls that he thought he was in-love with, but in reality was just in-love with love, and that it could save him from his misery.

in klebold's journal, specifically the page dated: 1/2/98, the text reads:

man I dont know what's up lately...never do in existence. All this shit w. [edited] and [edited] friends.... so wierd & different from past... yet again, thats the way in existence. I wonder if i ll ever have a love...my love. [edited] got his, I dont, wont ever get mine. Here's all the people ive loved, or at least liked (or thought I loved) - all the same meaning.

followed by this image:

now he says "all the same meaning" and because of the hearts, I will assume the list is of people he had crushes on or thought he was "in-love with".

perhaps the halcyon girl was part of this list, or maybe these are past crushes, but still it gives an insight that dylan was not focused on just one girl and he was just kinda having little crushes on girls and was somehow convincing himself (that at least some) were 'true love'.

I've seen a few names thrown around. those being:

rachel joy scott

marla foust

kristen theibault

erin boortz

i'll try to explain why each girl has been said to might've been her halcyon girl, there's a LOT of info for some, and I'm just typing what I remember.

why rachel joy scott? oh boy.

the letter R in the heart drawn in the klebold's diary. but there is no direct information about them being close. like at all. other than they both had devon as a mutual friend. they knew each other and probably only just because of the saved performance.

why marla foust? marla is picked mainly for two reasons: the acoustic poem, the mention of "mara" in klebold's writings and that he supposedly asked her to prom.

In his journal entry of november '97 called "ThoughtS":

"church was so fun.... the rec thing w. mara". there's speculation that he just misspelled her name, which isn't far fetched seeing that he misspelled his own middle name at some point.

the acoustic poem:

there's 10 letters, marla foust, is 10 letters. it's possible to fit her name in:

M is for the moments of joy she gives me A is for how she Always Leaves me helpless with her beautiful gaze. R is for the RARE moments she shares w. me L is for the Lost & found love that I've been Looking for all my Life A is the Aspect of us as a couple. F how Fondly i hope to spend time with her O how she is the only one i love, that i have ever Loved U is for the universe where we can Look at the stars. S How Supremely beautiful she is T Her Taste for everything she does.

as for the prom, marla told investigators at one incident klebold asked her to prom, but had to declined his offer because she already had a date. (however some people think she lied about that because dylan didn't even know the date to prom and robyn had to basically beg him to go).

why kristen theibault? klebold a girl in his june ‘97 entry called "my 1st love??":

“such a strange name, like mine”, the theory is derived because of her last name, ‘theibault’ pronounced a lot like ‘klebold’. plus, kristen not only have friends in the TCM, (joe stair, chris morris and tad boles) she and dylan definitely knew each other at-least, to the point that dylan's dad mentioned her.

why erin boortz? again, the acoustic poem, but instead, with erin:

E = is for the (everlasting, eternal, ecstatic) joy she gives me R = is for how she (renders) me helpless with her beautiful gaze I = is for the innocent (infinite, intense) moments times she shares w. me N = is for the (new, newly) found love that I've been looking for all my life B = is the (both, beauty) of us as a couple O = is for how (often) I hope to spend time with her O = is for she is the (only) one I love, that I have ever loved. R = is for the (roof) where we can look at the stars T = is for how (truly, totally, terrifyingly) beautiful she is Z = her (zeal, zest) for everything she does

fun fact: erin's chevy blazer was hit with bullets during the shooting. I can't find much info about her than that lol.

that's about all I can think about tbh. I wouldn't be surprised if it was one of these girls, or maybe all of them at some point. or just a few. I've seen some people say he may had feelings for devon, but who knows.

a few things from his journal like:

"girls i know (mainly [edited] & [edited]), how i know i can never have them, yet i can still dream..." - mentions two girls and how he can't be with them.

"The one who I thought was my true love, [Edited], is not. Just a shell of what I want the most... The meanest trick was played on me - a fake love... She in reality doesn't give a good fuck about me... doesn't even know me..... I have no happiness, no ambitions, no friends, & no LOVE!!!" - ok. so bro really has the habit of just saying some girls are his true love and then realize they aren't. u see what i'm saying? he was playing hot potato.

"Goodbye all the crushes ive ever had, just shells.... images, no tu truths... BUT WHY?" - alright, first. crushes. plural. and again, frustration that said girl(s) didn't meet his halcyon expectations.

"[Edited] who i think i love deeper than ever... I was hollow, thought I was right. Another form of the Downward Spiral... deeper & deeper it goes. to cuddle w. her, to be one w. her, to love; just laying there." - ok. see, and now he just goes to another chick he's SUREEE is his true love.

"I don't know my love: could be [edited], or [edited], or [edited], or [edited], or anyone. I don't know & im sick of not KNOWING!! to be kept in the dark is a punishment!!!" - this could go on forever, but i think my point is made. he didn't love one girl, he was just desperate for something of "not knowing". he just wanted something or in this case, someone to save him.

tldr: dylan was lonely and just wanted some girl and the love they'd have to "save him".

[kaitsawamura]

I am proud to announce I will be joining the initiative created over at @ficsforgaza! They, along with all the other incredibly talented participants, are doing some really great work. Thank you to FFG for creating a tangible way for us to help those suffering in Palestine, even if some of us can't afford to offer monetary assistance <3

THIS POST WAS LAST UPDATED 6/1/24

I might open requests in the future but for now, I am accepting proof of donation to sponsor current WIPs only.

Select a vetted donation link. You can find a good list -> HERE <-

Send me a screenshot of your donation through my inbox or in a DM. Due to these factors, donations cannot be anonymous at this time. I will also be sharing screenshots/proof of donation with @ficsforgaza for their records and verification. PLEASE MAKE SURE YOU COVER/BLUR ANY PERSONAL INFORMATION ON YOUR PROOF OF DONATION.

I would hope this wouldn't need to be stated but please do not reuse donation screenshots. Make a new donation for each request.

Once you have sent proof of donation and chosen your WIP, you can opt in or out to be listed as a tagged sponsor on the WIP's masterlist. Some of the available WIPs have masterlists already live (I would tag you and repost) and some are oneshots that have yet to be posted (you would be tagged as a sponsor at the time that it is finished and live).

I will label each work individually, but please assume that everything I write will be 18+ MDNI/N*FW at one point or another.

WORD COUNT PER DOLLAR (SUBJECT TO CHANGE)

For every $1 donated, I will write 100 words towards your chosen WIP. I.E: If you donate $5, I will write 500 words.

Current Word Count Cap Per One Request: 1000 Words (You can show proof of a larger donation, but this is currently the most words that can be requested per person ☺︎ )

Current Total Word Cap: 5000 words (This is currently the point at which I will pause proof of donations until I catch up ☺︎ )

Thank you for reading a respecting my rules!

THIS IS CURRENTLY A PLACEHOLDER

SERIES

East of My Heart (West of My Soul) | Estimated WC: 50K | Current WC: 25K | BNHA Folk Tale AU | Prince!Izuku Midoriya x Reader | 18+ MDNI

SUMMARY: Your life is one that is abundant with family and the magic in small things.  But when a great white bear comes rumbling at your family’s cottage door one winter’s night, you are obviously taken aback.  Even more so when he speaks to you in a language you can understand and asks for your help.  Come away with him, live with him in the ice castle he calls home for a year and day and release him from the curse that blights him.  You agree to go with him even if as time goes along, it is very apparent that there is more to this polar bear than meets the eye.  There is more to a lot of different things as you learn to love the polar bear as friend and companion during the day but are visited by a mysterious man who insists on sleeping in your bed every night.  Can you last a year and a day to save the bear from this strange enchantment?  Will you learn the true identity of the man you’ve come to care so deeply for?  Will you find yourself (and maybe love) along the way?

The Farmer and The Wizard | Estimated WC: 50-75K | Current WC: 3.2K | JJK Stardew Valley AU | Wizard!Gojo x Farmer!Reader | 18+ MDNI

SUMMARY: You need a change, a big one. When your estranged grandfather passes away and bequeaths you his farm in a little town just south of the middle of nowhere, you take it as the sign you needed to make a change instead of waiting for one. The farm, while having fallen into a state of disrepair, is just the thing to cure your modern-world ailments. The people are kind and always ready to offer help, if a bit unusual. They have old superstitions, a haunted community center, and a resident wizard. Spoiler alert: those last two on the list take some getting used to. Yes, things are different here but you have a sneaking suspicion that the slow pace and a certain alchemical practitioner are going to remind you that sometimes, all you need is time and a little bit of magic.

that's just wasteland, baby | Estimated WC: 15K | Current WC: 2.2K | BotW/TotK!Link and Zelda x Reader | 18+ MDNI

SUMMARY: Calamity Ganon has finally been vanquished for good, Link and Zelda have finally managed to break the wheel. But things are not as either of them had hoped they would be. Zelda is soon to be Queen with all the duties of such a position. Link would remain her knight and yet, he is restless. When he hears of the restoration efforts in Lurelin Village, he decides that he must go. He can’t stay cooped up within the castle walls, not after so long in the wild. Zelda and Link are unsure of the new direction their lives are taking but maybe they’ll find that their true north is you.

ONESHOTS

a shrike and a thorn | Estimated WC: 3K | Current WC: 1.2K | Priest!Kento Nanami x Congregant!Reader | 18+ MDNI

SUMMARY: You save everyone but who saves you? You don’t know what makes you step foot in that church.  But you do and you spend the next year a dutiful congregant to Father Nanami.  Devoted and kind, he’s exactly the kind of man you would expect to be a priest.  And none of this would be a problem if it weren’t for the fact that you can’t stop thinking about what it would be like to see him lose his religion between your legs.  Unbeknownst to you, the good Father is having the same kind of thoughts.  Will the two of you build a new altar at which you might worship?

They Say It's Your Birthday | Estimated WC: 3K | Current WC: 1.6K | Pro Hero!Eijiro Kirishima x Reader | 18+ MDNI

SUMMARY: Strangers to lovers (they meet in the club), birthday smut for the Birthday Boy, I've had this in my drafts for literally three years to post on Eiji's birthday.

The Indomitable Human Spirit | Estimated WC: 2-3K | Current WC: 366 | Modern!Sukuna x Reader | 18+ MDNI

SUMMARY: No description for this yet either, just wanted to explore the idea of Sukuna putting his claim on you but not in the way you'd think he would, more in like the thing about how a warring alien race comes to earth and is baffled and fascinated by the enduring human spirit.

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All works marked as such belong to Kait of kaitsawamura © 2020-PRESENT. Please do not alter, repost, or copy my content.

[tricksterlatte]

The Online Fandom 7 Deadly Sins

sloth: complaining about how no one writes the tropes or pairings you like and bashing what's already out there, while refusing to create anything you desire yourself

greed: zine and other finance-related scandals with zero remorse for those negatively affected

gluttony: spending rent money on merch, experiencing buyer's remorse, then repeating the same process next month

wrath: anon hate over literally everything under the sun, even harassing official writers and threatening them if they don't make your ship canon

pride: devaluing other's characterizations and ships to praise yours as better, whether through a canon perspective or a moral perspective, when neither matter in the long run when it comes to your own enjoyment

envy: trash talking others' fandom creations or saying you won't bother creating anything because it'll never be as good as them

lust: fighting over who tops or bottoms because of your personal preferences when one, both, or neither could happen, especially when most of these characters never even kiss canonically nor have most people fighting done any of these things irl themselves

[exopelagic]

honk shoo.

[scattered-winter]

the urge to start a garage rock band despite 1) not touching my drumset in literally like 2 years and 2) not knowing anybody who both plays the instruments and fits the vibe

[scrambled-eggsed]

Unfortunately discovering that 70% of having a job is stressing about doing everything wrong even though its probably okay, and just. Being Worried 24/7

[bootleg-nessie]

Rating band names based on their accuracy:

(I keep updating this list so check back later)

The Beatles: 3/10. None of these people are beetles, they’re just a bunch of fruity guys from Liverpool with matching haircuts

(Edit: changed from 0/10 to 3/10 because John Lennon beat his wife)

Pink Floyd: 4/10. There is not a single person named Floyd in the band, but some of the members do arguably look kinda pink

Nirvana: 10/10. Getting high and listening to Nirvana is roughly what I imagine actual nirvana to be like

Foo Fighters: either 0/10 or 10/10. I have never seen foo in real life so either they’re pretending to fight a problem that doesn’t exist or they’re doing an absolutely fantastic job of fighting it

The Eagles: 0/10. Same as the Beatles, there is not a single eagle in this band. The name is misleading and we have all been lied to

Queen: 6/10. Partial points for Freddie Mercury

Led Zeppelin: 0/10. I don’t think any of these guys have ever even seen a zeppelin, let alone one made of lead. A lead balloon would crash faster than my hopes and dreams

The Rolling Stones: 3/10. There is not a single stone in this band. Some points added because I’m pretty sure they rolled quite a few

U2: 0/10. Despite what the name says, I am not a member of this band

Metallica: 9/10. Naming a metal band “Metallica” is like naming your dog “doggy”

Red Hot Chili Peppers: 2/10. These guys are not chili peppers. They’re not even that hot, let alone red hot

Guns N’ Roses: 0/10. How the fuck could a gun or a flower play music

Backstreet Boys: ?/10. Depends entirely on their current given location

Simon and Garfunkel: 10/10. No notes

The Doors: 1/10. Jim Morrison is kinda shaped like a door tho

Chicago: 4/10. The number of people in this band does not come even remotely close to the population of Chicago. Points added because it originated in Chicago

Earth, wind, and fire: 2/10. This is even more innacurate than Chicago. Points added because wind instruments were often used

Def Leppard: 3/10. There is not a single leopard in this band. Some of the members are probably kinda deaf by now tho

The Beach Boys: ?/10. Accuracy depends entirely on location

The Black Eyed Peas: 6/10. Not sure what the hell an ‘eyed pea’ is but the black part is pretty accurate

Imagine Dragons: ?/10. Depends entirely on whether or not they’re thinking about dragons.

Cage the Elephant: 1/10. Why would you do that. Let the elephant go

Green Day: 0/10. They’re not even green

The Police: 0/10. There is not a single cop in this band

KISS: 5/10. I’m sure they probably kissed sometimes

The Monkees: 0/10. Are you fucking kidding me

We Butter the Bread with Butter: 8/10. I can’t verify this but I have no reason to suspect that they’d lie. Butter seems like the most logical thing to butter bread with

King Gizzard and the Lizard Wizard: 0/10. I got really excited about the concept of a lizard wizard only to be let down. My disappointment is immeasurable

They Might Be Giants: 5/10. I googled everyone in this band’s height, the tallest guy’s only 6’1 so I wouldn’t exactly consider him a giant. Then again, I can’t really argue because the claim was only that they MIGHT be giants

The Presidents of the United States of America: 2/10. None of these people are Joe Biden nor are any of them former presidents. This is incredibly misleading. I’m pretty sure “Lump” was written about my first girlfriend tho so I’ll give them a point or two

Gorillaz: 2/10 Not quite but we’re kinda close genetically so I’ll give them partial credit

The Killers: ?/10. I have no way of verifying if they’ve actually killed before but the fact that they’re not in prison tells me probably not

The Offspring: 10/10. These guys are definitely somebody’s offspring

Arctic Monkeys: 1/10. They are neither monkeys nor are they from the arctic

Thirty Seconds to Mars: 1/10. It takes WAY longer to get to mars than that

Beastie Boys: 8/10. They’re pretty beast on the guitar

Jimmy Eat World: 1/10. Slow the fuck down Jimmy, you’re biting off way more than you can chew

Hole: 9/10. One point deducted because I’m pretty sure they had more than one hole

Rage Against the Machine: 10/10. They did exactly that

Alice In Chains: 0/10. This is illegal. Let Alice go

The Band: 10/10. This could not possibly be more accurate

Nine Inch Nails: 1/10. I can’t find any good pictures of their feet but from what I can tell their fingernails definitely aren’t nine inches long

Bush: ?/10. Not quite sure about this one, felt uncomfortable asking

The Who: 2/10. I’m not dealing with this “Who’s On First” bullshit

Radiohead: 0/10. Not a single person in this band has a radio for a head

Queens of the Stone Age: 0/10. This band should be called “five random dudes from the modern era” but FRDFTMA is a bit of a mouthful

Soundgarden: 2/10. Sound does not grow in the garden

Sonic Youth: 5/10. They’re not exactly youth anymore but the sonic part checks out

Talking heads: 8/10. There’s more to the band than just a bunch of disembodied heads but the heads do tend to talk

The Cranberries: 0/10. Decent music but I only added them so that the Beatles and Freddie Mercury weren’t the only fruits on this list

The Wiggles: 8/10. They do tend to wiggle a lot

Blue Man Group: 10/10. Yep!

Weezer: 5/10. They all look like they definitely have asthma

Limp Bizkit: 3/10. While the visual image of baked goods playing the guitar is hilarious, Fred durst is not a biscuit. Points added because he probably has erectile dysfunction

Stone Temple Pilots: 0/10. None of these people are accredited as being licensed to pilot anything, much less an entire stone temple. Stone temples don’t need pilots anyways

Wasted Youth: 8/10. I guess it really kinda depends on how you frame it but yeah, they probably wasted a lot of it

Them Crooked Vultures: 3/10. These are people and not birds but Dave Grohl’s posture is kinda bad and John Paul Jones is so old that his neck kinda looks like a vulture’s so I added some points

Audioslave: 0/10. Slavery is illegal

Traveling Wilburys: 4/10. Sure, they traveled a lot but not a single one of those lying bastards was named Wilbury

D12: 6/12. There were only 6 people in this band

NWA: 10/10. I’m a little too white to safely comment on this one but I’d say they nailed it

Jet: 1/10. A real jet would be way too loud

Goldfinger: 0/10. Not a single person in this band has a finger made out of gold

No Doubt: ?/10. I can’t really be too sure how Gwen Stefani felt but I think it’s probably a safe assumption that she had some doubts

The White Stripes: 3/10. I bet if you stripped them down naked and made them stand shoulder to shoulder and squinted really hard they’d probably look more like white stripes

Screaming trees: 3/10. They scream occasionally

Garbage: 2/10. I think they’re being a little harsh on themselves, their music isn’t THAT bad

Butthole Surfers: 5/10. Not even gonna touch this one

Megadeth: 3/10. To be fair, some of the former members are dead but only a little amount of death, not mega death

Dead Kennedys: 2/10. Last I checked Kennedy was still dead but neither he nor his clones are members of this band

Cake: 0/10. The cake is a lie

Cracker: 8/10. Most of them are

Tool: 7/10. I don’t know much about their music but they sure look like tools

Counting Crows: ?/10. Is this what emo kids do instead of counting sheep? Accuracy depends on whatever bird they happen to be counting at the moment

Dave Matthews Band: 10/10. It certainly is

Oasis: 1/10. Their music is the opposite of an oasis

Blur: 2/10. They are not that fast

Barenaked Ladies: 0/10. If I wanted to be this disappointed I’d reestablish a connection with my biological father instead

Meat Puppets: 10/10. Technically, aren’t we all?

Live: 8/10. Apparently they still do live shows but I deducted some points because I’ve only ever heard their music on Spotify

ABBA: 9/10. I’m still not giving any points to Guns N’ Roses but that’s mostly out of spite

5 Finger Death Punch: 8/10 I guess it probably depends on how hard you hit them but this seems to be the usual amount of fingers to punch somebody with

All American Rejects: 9/10. They’re all rejects from America so I don’t really see any issue with this

T. Rex: 0/10. Even if any of these people WAS a T. Rex I don’t think their arms would be long enough to play their instruments

Free: 0/10. Unless you steal their music, in which case it becomes a 10/10

The Strokes: 3/10. To my knowledge, none of them have had a stroke but I still added a few points because the name was probably accurate for other reasons

The Smashing Pumpkins ?/10. Another thing I have no way of verifying but this seems like a waste of perfectly good pumpkins

Therapy?: ?/10. The hell are they asking me for? I don’t know their medical history

Twenty One Pilots. 0/10. There’s only two of them and neither is a licensed pilot

Finger Eleven: 0/10. Leave the poor Stranger Things girl out of this

Fall Out Boy: 9/10. I conferred with an expert on this one who confirmed that they are in fact boys who had a falling out

Cream: 8/10. Considering this was the OG supergroup I’m sure a lot of people did in fact cream when their music came out

Edit: humans aren’t fucking monkeys. Stop saying we are