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kwritingbooks · 2 years

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cowritten by me & @shroombloomm

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Aurora has a lot to think about while Harry is gone, but just because he's gone now doesn't mean he won't be back soon. Which also means that she can't hide away from the issues at hand forever, especially when that familiar knock on the door rings out. But maybe it won't be as bad as she keeps telling herself...

AU: star-being!harry x astronomy-student!aurora

AURORA'S POV

It would be a lie to say the last few days were easy, or that I was able to pretend it didn't happen. The truth was, while some of it was foggy, not enough of it was for that to happen. None of the parts that I would have preferred to forget were misplaced in memory at all. Not the look on Harry's face when I saw him over Brandon's shoulder, not the aggravation from Nina, and not the touches I allowed Brandon in the first place either.

I didn't even know why I did it. Or why I allowed it to keep going. The regret had yet to fully subside even afterwards. It also didn't help that Nina had given me her version of silent treatment the night of. She didn't say much to me unless she needed to, but there wasn't much she needed to say besides helping me get to bed. I was pretty sure I had even started crying at one point, mumbling about how I fucked things up between everyone and how stupid I was to go to the party.

Nina just shushed me to sleep, saying that we would talk about it in the morning when I had sobered up. Which we did. She seemed more put together then and less annoyed with me, too. As long as she wasn't holding a grudge over me, that was all that mattered in the moment. She never was upset for long, which I was eternally grateful for. Sometimes I didn't fully deserve it, but that never seemed to matter.

I even remembered instinctively reaching for my phone once I woke up more, hoping to see a message from Harry. Some kind of acknowledgement had to have been better than nothing. Until I remembered that he had left for the next few days back to his planet. I tried not to think about what he could possibly be thinking, but he was probably too preoccupied with his star duties anyway– whatever that meant.

Instead, the only messages I received were texts that I had the least amount of energy to deal with. They were from Brandon from last night, rambling different cursing variations slewn together from his obvious drunken state. It was hard to piece together completely what he was trying to say, but it was obvious that he was angry that I got up and left him for Harry. Actually, most of the insults were directed towards Harry, messily explaining how Harry would never give me what I needed whereas he could. Most involved the size of his dick.

That was probably the first time I had truly laughed since that night. The blocked and deleted buttons had never been so easy to press.

She had breakfast cooking, but she said I had to get out of bed to get it. It took awhile to muster up the energy over the hangover, but I think that was part of the punishment, whether on purpose or not.

Regardless, once I did get up, I didn't eat much. The blaring headache in my skull was too powerful to focus on anything else besides fighting the urge to vomit all over the countertops. That was how I ended up spending the majority of the rest of the day. While she ran errands, I tried my best to sleep it all away. I wrote off the sunken feeling I felt in my chest as another inevitable symptom of binge drinking, but when I woke up the next day sober, I realized that that wasn't at fault of the alcohol at all.

I knew I should've used the time I had proactively. I also knew that my door was supposed to be fixed yesterday and that it was safe to go back, but it was as if I physically couldn't. Astro barking to go outside for a walk was the only reason that I found myself leaving the house on my own accord.

That was how I spent most of my time while I was at Nina's. It started off being sick with a hangover and meddled with a slip of depression in the midst. I think Nina had definitely noticed, because she was kinder than her already normally-kind self was. She made sure I still woke up for classes, ate beforehand, and was clean enough to go out in public. If it was anyone else besides Nina, I would've gotten annoyed– yelling that they're not my mom, but there was no way I could be annoyed by her. She was just trying to help, and if it wasn't for her help I would've stayed in my stumper for that entire time.

It did eventually get better, and luckily that feeling didn't completely devastate me for too long. Though, it was still hard to fight against the feeling that I hadn't truly messed up everything. Mistakes were bound to happen for anyone, and hopefully Harry would understand that. We were just friends after all.

I was still nervous about him coming back to Earth today, though. I had spent most of the morning going over what I would say when I first saw him. I didn't know there were so many ways to apologize until that moment– swearing none of them felt right. Nina reminded me that I was thinking too hard about it and that I was beating myself too much over it.

"Just say what feels right, don't force anything else." She had said as she came around the corner in the kitchen. She must have heard me talking to myself, whispering "sorry" in one too many different ways.

"I think he'll understand. Just be honest." She continued after I didn't say anything. She could probably tell that she had taken me by surprise. I was too absorbed in the pancakes and eggs that I was cooking that I didn't realize she had woken up.

The smell of which only seemed to riddle me with more guilt, reminding me of earlier in the week when Harry had done the same for me. Maybe that was why I went for that option out of instinct, it felt like the perfect reciprocation for him to come back to his second home with. I even added blueberries inside for the special touch.

I turned my head behind me, giving her a faint smile as she ventured to my other side. She peered down at the pan, taking a small whiff of the batter cooking in front of us.

"Smells good." She paused as she made her way towards the coffee maker, pouring herself a cup. "Could this have anything to do with a certain someone coming back home today?"

I didn't have to look at her to know that she was smirking. I had to fight against my own as I flipped another one of the pancakes in the pan.

"Or..." I trailed off, trying to wipe off the guilty look on my face. "Maybe I'm just hungry."

She snorted. "Sure, right, of course."

"Why did you say it like that?" I sat my mug down onto the counter to face her with a hand on my hip. "It's just Harry."

"It's just Harry." She mocked me teasingly behind her cup of coffee before taking a slow sip of it. I rolled my eyes at her, turning my body to face away. I tried to hide the smile that carved deep into my cheeks, but it was hard not to.

It was just Harry. That was all.

Just Harry.

"Anyways, he should be stopping by here soon I think." I stirred the spoon into my coffee cup, pursing my lips to the side as I got lost into my own thoughts.

I suppose I was a bit scared to see him. Nina always had a gift for seeing right through me. I just hated that she would say it out loud. I didn't think I had even said it out loud to myself, even when I was left alone without any other eyes on me.

Saying things out loud made it real, and that was what scared me. I wanted to stay in my bliss of ignorance for just a bit longer. Bathe in my own delusions of what I had made for myself on the inside. I didn't have to say anything out loud. Not if I didn't want to. And I did not want to.

"Aurora, if you make this awkward, I swear to fuck I am leaving your ass here." Nina said as she pushed past me on purpose. It was a soft nudge to the shoulder, but I knew what she was trying to say through the gesture.

"I am not going to make it awkward!" I half whined. I didn't even notice my hands going over my face when I had said it. I didn't mean to make things awkward, but I guess I did have that tendency sometimes. Especially when I was nervous.

"You better not, because like I said, I will leave." She teased. "If it's one thing you're good at, it's making everything awkward. Just talk to him like nothing happened. It's not that hard, Aurora."

"You say that, but–" I went to defend myself, but the knock on the door had quickly grabbed my attention. I felt my body go stiff, not even noticing the way my hands were now death-gripping the hot cup of coffee that I held.

"Mm, speaking of the devil." Nina nodded towards the door with a teasing smile on her lips. I squinted my eyes at her as she made her way towards the door. I truly didn't feel as nervous earlier as I did right now, which I didn't even know was possible.

There was a turning feeling in my stomach. I didn't think that seeing Harry right now was going to make me react this way, but I also just didn't think I was ready for it this soon. I didn't know what to say to him. Not yet.

I sunk into the deepest parts of the kitchen that was away from the front door. I wasn't hiding. I was just...cooking. Exactly. I was just cooking. That was all.

I sat my coffee down onto the counter as I grabbed the bowl of batter, quickly pouring some into the hot pan that Nina had on the eye. Noises from the door opening made my stomach twist uncomfortably, and then I heard him, only contorting it further.

"Hey, Nina. Aurora's still here, right?" His voice floated through the apartment as Nina closed the door from behind her.

"Yeah, she's in the kitchen." Nina perked up with a cheery tone. I pinched my eyes shut tightly, placing a hand on my forehead as I tried to collect myself.

They were having small talk, and that was fine. It bought me more time to regain my composure, which I was more than happy for. It was when I heard his footsteps coming towards the kitchen that I started to feel my tensions rise again. I immediately started to busy myself around the area, trying to make it look like I didn't even know he was there as if I wasn't just eavesdropping on the conversation they were having.

I settled on standing in front of the oven with a spatula in my hand while I flipped the pancakes that were burning in the pan. My chest was caving in while my breathing was staggering as I glanced out of the corner of my eye to see Harry standing in the doorway of the kitchen.

It really didn't matter how much I had seen of him, he still knew how to knock the breath out of me any time he was around. He had a loose, white, and washed out Rolling Stones shirt on with blue jeans that ripped at the knees. That was all I could see from the small glance I had given him. It was all I could bear.

"Hi." His voice was laced with nervousness. I could tell that much. It almost lifted a bit of weight off of me to know that I wasn't the only one that was uncomfortable, but he didn't know that.

I felt like the minute I said something, my voice was going to give everything away regardless, though. In order not to let the silence linger any more than it already had, I finally spoke up.

"Hey." I echoed out with my head crooked over my shoulder in his direction. I caught a brief glimpse of him before I brought my gaze back to the food that was almost finished cooking. I was on my last one, which also meant that I wouldn't have any more excuses to keep my focus laying anywhere else but the people around me.

He was leaning against the doorframe and I couldn't tell if he had a look of confusion or concern wrapped in his features just from the small glance that I had gotten. The unknowing of what was going through his mind was the most nerve-wracking of all. In reality, I knew I was probably blowing it slightly out of proportion, but it didn't help settle my mind any more with that knowledge anyway.

I placed the last blueberry pancake onto the platter, stacking high with steam creeping off of the cakes. Just as I twisted the knob of the stove off, I heard his steps behind me start to move closer. For a moment, I considered cooking more just so I didn't have to turn around and face him. Even though it had already been a few days since, the embarrassment from that night was still just as overwhelming. At least beforehand I didn't have to face Harry about it, I could just ignore it and let it eventually pass until it came up again.

But there was no ignoring it when it was directly behind me.

"Everything okay?" Harry questioned quietly, sounding slightly unsure about his own feelings himself. Out of the corner of my eye, I could see him now leaning against the counter to my right. He was using his elbow to prop himself up as he gazed at me.

I flashed a meek smile at him, gathering all the dishes and placing them in the sink between us. "Yeah, I'm good."

He wrinkled his eyes at me as he surveyed what I was doing. I could tell he was attempting to figure out what I was thinking but was getting slightly frustrated when he couldn't pinpoint what it was. I wasn't sure if it was because I was doing a good job at remaining neutral, or if it was the barrier between species that was helping me out. I was grateful either way.

"Harry!" I heard Nina exclaim as she re-entered the room. "I almost forgot– You're coming to the get-together later, right? It was supposed to be this big party at some dude's house, but plans changed a bit. Plans changing as in that guy is a dick and it'll be lame, so we made our own plans instead. It'll be fun!" She beamed.

I inhaled a deep breath as I continued to place everything to their designated spots. I pretended like I wasn't just as excited as Nina to hear what he was going to reply with. We had decided it was just going to be the four of us while Harry was gone, so we couldn't update him beforehand. I had to explain to her the same bullshit excuse as to why he wouldn't be able to answer his texts while he went to go see his parents. Luckily, she didn't pry too much on it and just accepted it.

"Oh, uh..." He stammered for a moment. "I had forgotten. Don't we have work to do and classes tomorrow?" His voice sounded unsteady for a second and I could tell that he had been taken off guard. I felt bad.

"It's nothing huge, I promise! We all don't have classes until later tomorrow anyways." Her voice raised an octave from excitement as she got in front of Harry, pouting her lip out. "C'mon, Harry! Pleaseee..."

I smiled to myself as I placed the last plate onto the table with the pancakes directly in the middle of all of them. Once finished, I leaned an arm against the table and watched the interaction between the two of them, giggling slightly to myself.

He still looked faintly uncomfortable as he searched his eyes around the room. Nina backed away with a small huff, looking at me out of the corner of her eye. I shifted, placing a hand onto my cheek as I looked away from the both of them.

Okay, maybe this was a little bit awkward.

"Okay, okay. Just think about it, okay? I've got to get to class, so I'll see you guys later." She flashed one last smile in Harry's direction before venturing in my direction. With a bare hand, she reached for the first pancake on the stack and winked at me.

"Stop being awkward and use that Aurora charm that works so well!" She whispered in my ear, concealing it with a hug. She mouthed one last "you got this" before taking a bite and turning on her heel out the door, giving Harry a pat on the back on the way.

The silence trickled back between us as we were now left alone again, but this time truly alone. I tapped my fingers against the dining room table for a moment as I thought. With a singular deep breath, I sat down in one of the seats.

"I made blueberry pancakes if you're hungry–" I stopped myself, wanting to kick myself in the foot after the realization that he doesn't get hungry. "Or if you just wanna try them, I guess."

"Blueberries?" He questioned with his brows knitted together. He peered over the table as he took a step closer. "What does it taste like?"

I smiled as he pulled the chair out for him to sit in. He didn't even wait to hear my explanation before slapping the biggest cake onto his plate. His head crooked at the shape, as if trying to understand how the berries got stuck inside of it.

"There's only one way to find out." I half-laughed. "They're good, I promise. They're not the poisonous kind of berries." A full laugh broke out that time, but dissipated when I saw the look of horror etched onto his face.

"There's poisonous berries?" His eyes widened as big as the moon and I thought that he was about to toss the plate away from him.

"No. Well, I mean, yes, there are poisonous berries but not the ones you buy in the store. Blueberries are sweet and they taste good. Try it." I nudged my head towards his plate for encouragement, but he still looked unsure. So, I took a bite of my own and he looked at me like he was waiting for me to fall over dead on the floor.

I swallowed, forking another bite onto the silverware. "See? Not dead."

His eyes softened as he stared back down, cutting his own slice and placing it into his mouth. For a few minutes, that was how we continued to exist amongst each other. Both of us were so preoccupied with the food that we didn't say anything. There was still a slight awkwardness in the air, but it had greatly subdued. I had almost forgotten what I was so worried about to begin with given how natural it felt to be around him again.

That was probably the reason why I had enough confidence to say the next thing that I did.

"I'm sorry, by the way." I strained to get the words out, convinced I would choke on my food if I wasn't careful. A swig of coffee helped coat my throat and soothe my nerves simultaneously.

"Sorry?" He repeated in a confused tone.

I stopped eating my food, trying to focus on what to say next. I was hoping I wouldn't have to explain what I was apologizing for and that it would be obvious, but that didn't look to be the case this morning.

"With the whole Brandon thing...at the bar...you know?" I mindlessly cut up the pancakes into smaller pieces, not picking any of it up into my fork. I had to stop myself from continuing as it would just become one big mushy mess if I didn't.

"Ah." He mentioned softly. Such a small word left such a weird hollowed out feeling in my stomach again. It was like he had forgotten and I was stupid enough to bring it back up for him to remember. Regardless, I knew I needed to apologize sooner than later. I was sorry after all. I didn't need to lie or pretend it never happened.

"I don't want you to think that's who I am. It's who I was, but I don't like that side of me. I blocked him and I don't want anything to do with him anymore, okay? He's not a good guy and I should've known better. I'm sorry you had to see any of that." My eyes looked along the table, suddenly interested in the table cloth fabric as I twisted it between my fingers.

"Okay. I believe you." He replied, quicker than I expected. The previous look of hurt was no longer on his face, it was now replaced with that familiar Starboy sparkle in his eyes that I had grown so much comfort in.

"Thank you, Harry." I grinned at him. The uneasiness had drifted away and so had the queasiness that had grown in my stomach. I forked away at the food again, looking up briefly towards Harry who was doing the same.

"You should come tonight, though. It'll be fun. You'll get to meet Nina's boyfriend, Ryan, too." I said as I piled the last bite into my mouth. I hummed lightly to myself, content with my now-full stomach.

"Is he nice?" He inquired aloud suspiciously. "Because most of the men I've met so far are not very nice."

I had to hold back the snort that I wanted to let out from his observations, but I couldn't help but feel a ping of guilt. Harry watched the way I surrounded myself around guys that weren't that nice of people. If he had realized that so quickly, and I wondered why I had let it happen over and over again.

"I don't know much about him either, but Nina really likes him and I want to give him a chance. You should, too." I said quietly, offering an innocent smile.

He twitched his lips together as he thought, swirling around the leftover pieces of pancake still on his plate. "Okay." He mustered out. "As long as he's nice to her."

I smiled. "I'll make sure he is. We both will, okay?"

His eyes glided back up to mine, this time with the first real smile I had seen since he came back. I felt an immediate wave of relief flood through my chest. "Okay."

"Perfect. It's settled then." I beamed, gathering our finished plates and putting them into the sink. The water rushed out, splashing slightly onto my shirt from the suddenness of it. It was a good thing I was still in my pajamas, completely unaffected by the mess.

The mood within the room had completely flipped from only an hour ago, and I now felt on top of the world. Not only did it end a lot better than I expected it to, but we were all going to go out and have a good time with just the four of us. There was a little bit of nervousness about Nina's new boyfriend, but like I told Harry, I wanted to give him a chance. Given how patient she had been with me recently, as well as in the past, it was the least I could do for her. Maybe he would be the one frat guy that I could stand to be around.

It took some convincing at first, but as Nina described it more, the more excited I actually got. There would be no entering of stranger's homes; it actually didn't involve anyone's home at all. We were going to drive out to a spot that Nina and I had camped out at a time or two awhile back, completely surrounded by trees and nature.

Which also reminded me that I was already behind on my one and only job for it: rolling the joints.

"Oh, shit." I cursed out, shutting the water off and spinning around out of the room. "I'll be right back, I forgot something." I shouted over my shoulder, already out of view.

I wasn't sure if Harry said anything back as I was too preoccupied with rummaging through my drawer where I stashed everything. Everything from glass pipes, to jars of different strains, to decorated lighters, to cherry wrapping papers were all neatly placed in their rightful places. I was usually the one in charge of rolling as Nina swore up and down that I did it best, but I wasn't wholly convinced that she just preferred not to do it. I never minded though, I enjoyed the act of rolling. It was calming in some way to be so focused on one task.

I scanned my eyes along the contents as I thought to myself on which to choose. I ended up deciding on Wedding Cake, the classic mellow strain that I always found myself reaching for. Even though I wasn't sure which one Harry would have preferred, I thought that would be the safest out of the choices regardless.

Quickly, I grabbed the jar with the papers and padded away back into the kitchen where Harry still sat. He hadn't moved besides placing his hands neatly onto the tabletop, and he smiled at me once I entered. His eyebrows seemed to dance together as he tried to focus on what was in my hands, and I opened my mouth to explain myself, but then promptly closed it. I found it slightly entertaining to see him gape at the objects that I had placed onto the table.

It was as if I wasn't even in the room as he continued to stare at the nuggets that I placed into the grinder, spinning the lid in order to crush it up. I peeked up at him every now and then as I reached around for each object, and he didn't meet my eyes once until I brought the cherry papers up to my lips.

All of a sudden, the nervous feeling in the pit of my stomach reappeared as I swiped my tongue along the edge. I could feel his eyes on me even while I avoided them. It took everything in me not to close my eyes just to pretend he wasn't there– or to avoid my cheeks from blushing.

My thumbs threatened to shake as they carefully rolled the paper up, enclosing the weed inside of the material. For something I was typically so confident in, the feeling was suddenly dwindling with such eager eyes on me.

"What is that?" He finally spoke up, continuing his look of interest in his eyes. "It smells funny."

I giggled, placing one of the finished rolls onto a tray and began starting on the next one. "Weed, Harry. It's for the party tonight."

His head slightly fell back with a slight face of horror. "Weeds? Like the grass outside? That green stuff? I don't remember it smelling like that. What do you do with it?"

His rapid firing of questions reminded me of the Harry that I had first met, eager to know everything possible as soon as he could. Everything interested him and he wanted to know every single possible answer.

I chuckled again because of it. "No, not grass. It's a plant, but you smoke it. It makes you feel good, floaty almost." I peeked my eyes up at him as I began to lick at the next one. He no longer stared as intently at me as he once was, which helped ease the nervous feeling he had given me previously.

"I can already float, Aurora." He stated matter-of-factly with his arms crossed. "I don't need to smoke grass to float."

I snorted. "I suppose not, but you should try it at least once. I bet you'll like it." I smirked at him, putting up the rest of the contents that I had left over. After the nerves had settled, my previous work speed had gone back to normal and I had already rolled three joints perfectly by the time that he was inquiring about the weed.

"Will it feel like those good blue slushies from that one restaurant we went to?" His eyes began to glow with anticipation, practically bursting at the seams.

"No, not quite like that. It'll be more relaxing, like your whole body will feel it. Sensations will be stronger, too. You can watch us first to see if you want to try it." I reassured him. "Nina and I will make sure you're safe and comfortable regardless."

He nodded his head. "I think I'll try it. Maybe this type of floating won't be so exhausting."

I blew out a burst of air through my nose. "Hopefully not."

My attention turned towards the stove, reading out the time in glowing numbers. I didn't have a class until later, but I needed to stop by the planetarium beforehand so that I could get my supplies for the next presentation. Apparently the professor was so impressed by my first one that he wanted me to join him again for this week's showing. It hardly took me a second to reply with a quick acceptance.

"Do you want to come by the planetarium with me? I've gotta get some material from there and make sure there's nothing else that needs to be done before work tomorrow." I pushed my chair in, wiping my hands of any residue that had lingered against my fingertips. I mildly regretted doing this beforehand, not wanting to greet Professor Collins while smelling like weed.

Hopefully he wouldn't notice.

He nodded his head quickly again, scooting his seat in immediately as he grabbed for his bag and slung it over his shoulder promptly.

I chuckled lightly. "I gotta get dressed first. I'll be out in just a second and then we can go. I'll be quick, I promise."

It didn't take long to rummage through my closet. I slipped on an extra layer over my shirt, expecting the chilliness in the air to bite back with force. I did my best to try and dodge any mirrors, knowing I had to be quick, which meant I couldn't focus on my appearance. As long as I looked put together enough, that was all that mattered.

Luckily with the guidance and help of Nina, even my depressed stupor didn't affect my cleanliness too badly. I had even remembered to do my skincare routine earlier this morning before I got out of bed.

I almost tripped over my feet as I attempted to slip on my boots while I walked out of my bedroom door. After a couple of tries, I gave up and plopped myself on the floor while I laced them up correctly. I hadn't been this excited to leave the house since the whole bar situation. It was a nice change to the feelings I had been engulfed with since then. I liked this version of Aurora so much better.

"You ready?" I asked, slightly winded from the previous excursion I had put myself through in the hallway.

Harry turned around from Astro, who he was whispering to as he petted her back. She was wagging her tail vigorously, fighting to lick at his face as he knelt down to her.

"Let's go." He smiled, giving Astro one last pat on her head. He pointed in her direction. "Does she always slobber that much?" He sounded concerned.

"Only when she's excited...or thirsty." I offered with a shrug and a laugh. "Dogs can be kinda gross, I know."

His face twisted with a look of fascination mixed with disgust as we walked past her. Harry led the way, briefly looking over his shoulder in my direction.

"Quite peculiar they are."

The cool breeze greeted us as we left the apartment. This was just a reminder that summer was starting to slowly fade into fall. No more shorts and breezy shirts, or fun colors with sparkly makeup. It was going to be long sleeve shirts and pants from here on out.

I was a fan of the fall time, but summer was when I thrived the most. Specifically because it was a good time to see the stars, and it was more comfortable to lay outside at night and watch the constellations. I hated that the warmest of seasons seemed to go by so quickly, but it was something I surely couldn't control.

I wrapped myself up with my arms as my fingers slowly trailed up and down the goosebumps that the wind created on my skin. I wished I grabbed my thicker jacket, but I didn't expect the weather to change so drastically. It was hot yesterday, but then again, the weather never seemed to want to pick a side as they drifted into the new seasons.

"You cold?" Harry asked quietly from beside me. I glanced at him out of the corner of my eye, a small chuckle came from me as I shrugged my shoulders and dropped my arms to my sides.

"Um, just a bit." The small talk was kind of weird. I was glad we had gotten everything out of the way, but I still felt a gnawing guilt feeling in the back of my mind. Harry seemed fine, and I suppose that was all that really mattered. I just wanted him to be okay.

We kept walking, the gray skies clouding over the city. I had somewhat hoped that the clouds would subside by tonight so we could still watch the stars. One of the reasons I mainly went to these things was so I could get high and just stargaze.

One could say it was cliché, but I was a walking cliché after all. Never claimed not to be. I knew that as well, and I was okay with it. I had long gotten over the need to be different from everyone else, that was a cliché in and of itself.

"The weather today–"

"Don't do that to me." I told him with a chuckle, shaking my head at him. "We are not about to talk about the weather."

"Does weather talk not interest you, Aurora?" His smile dipped into a half frown, and I immediately felt bad. I kept having to remind myself that he wasn't from here, and that he didn't get that talking about the weather could be weird filler conversations reserved for strangers.

"Um...It's just that, sometimes, it could be taken weirdly, you know?" I kicked at the pebbles on the ground as we approached the planetarium. "Usually it's just a way to fill awkward space between people who don't know each other. Friends don't have to do that."

"Oh, okay. I see." I could've believed him if he didn't swallow the rest of his words down. Some things just weren't meant to be said. In our case, it was best if we just left it alone as it was now.

Harry led the way into the planetarium, and I was grateful for a moment that he did, given that I was nearly holding my breath the entire walk there. I felt my shoulders relax as I entered the warm building, the heat hugging me like a weighted blanket.

I hated doing things so last minute sometimes. If I wouldn't have put off needing to pick up the papers for next week's speech then I could be doing other things right now. Such as staring blankly at the notes for the test I had coming up, but not soaking anything in due to how tired I was. Or I could have been napping.

Harry stood close behind me as I walked into the main room of the building. The lights were dimmed down, but they were still on. Usually this place was packed, but today we didn't have anything scheduled to show. It was weird seeing this place so empty– so quiet.

I wheeled around the chairs, rushing towards the desk that was all the way in the back of the room. That was where Professor Collins said that he would have left the papers for me. I didn't think he was going to be in today, but I also didn't want to check either. I just wanted to be in and out.

Out of the corner of my eye, Harry stood next to the row of chairs that was by the desk as his eyes scanned around the room. His fingers slowly fiddled with the rings that cladded his hands. It took me a second to put two and two together, but then I realized.

This was where he was attacked by the light guardian. The night that we had met up at the coffee shop, where his face had been bruised and bloodied.

I clutched the papers tightly into my hand, moving my gaze towards the desk as I placed them into my bag.

"Looks like you've seen a ghost, Harry." Professor Collins's voice echoed through the room.

I saw Harry slightly jump at the sound of his voice, his body quickly turning to see him standing there with a wide smile on his lips and his arms crossed against his chest. I gazed over the two of them, seeing how uncomfortable Harry was made me feel bad for him.

"Oh, just–" Harry cleared his throat, shifting onto his feet slowly. "I just always found this building creepy when it's empty."

"Hm." Professor Collins hummed, giving Harry a once over before turning his body towards me. "Find those papers I left for you, Aurora?"

"I did!" I tried to sound cheery, but the tension somehow became a lot thicker in the air, but this time due to the newfound awkwardness. I didn't think it was possible after the residual feelings that were still felt in the air between Harry and I, but Collins being in the same room had proved that it was. "Sorry I was so late grabbing them, but I'll make sure that I study them before next week."

"Not a problem at all." He reassured me with a small smile. "Just want to make sure that you're prepared. We will be going over some more information I have gathered about black holes. I know we really haven't gone over that much, so just make sure you study the notes."

"Black holes?" Harry took a step towards the professor with a big smile. "Did you know that the milky way has a black hole?"

"Probably." He corrected Harry, perking his brow up as his lip twitched in curiosity. "Scientists say that it probably has a black hole. No further studies have proven it, not quite yet."

"Oh." Harry bit back. The fact that Harry said it, made it ring true. He knew everything about the stars and space himself. I mean, he lived there, so why wouldn't he?

"You sure know a lot about that, don't you?" Collins shifted his gaze towards Harry. "How long have you been going to school here again?"

"Um... I just started this semester." He said quietly, taking a step back from him as he crossed his arms over his chest.

"And yet, you know so much." Collins pondered to himself quietly, but loud enough where we could hear it. "Was this something you always wanted to do? Study the stars?"

"I mean, yeah." Harry cleared his throat again, bringing two of his fingers to push on his lips as he switched his gaze back and forth between Collins and I. "My parents are really into that kind of stuff, so...I guess that's why."

"And where are your parents, Harry? It seems like I don't know much about you, though you've been working here for sometime now." Collins said as he glanced towards me out of the corner of his eye. It was almost like he was making sure I was watching him dig into Harry.

Harry rubbed the soft stubble on his cheek with a frown as he averted his gaze towards me. I knew this was starting to get more uncomfortable for him by the moment, so I had to say something to get him out of the hole that Collins was digging him into.

"We have to go." I said almost in shock as I checked the time on my phone. "Harry, you have that hair appointment in twenty minutes. I totally forgot about that."

Harry's eyes widened, his hand dropping down to his side as he looked at me in confusion. Collins faced me, tilting his head as he looked me over. I stood there with a small smile on my lips, a nervous laugh spilling from them.

"Hair appointment–?"

"Well, it was really nice seeing you, Jerry." I said as I collected my things from the desk, shoving them into the bag swiftly. "We really need to get Harry to that appointment, but we can definitely talk later."

"Right..." He cleared his throat, a smile spreading across his lips. I let out a small breath as I nodded towards him, my hands interlocking with Harry's as I started towards the door.

"Bye!" Harry waved back at him with his free hand, his dimples planted into his cheeks as he smiled. I dared not to look back as I continued to pull Harry out of the door.

I didn't have to ask Harry, I think he already knew that that interaction was really weird. Collins had always been a really nice guy ever since I met him. I couldn't wrap my head around why he would ask a million questions to Harry. He had to have known it was awkward in the way he was throwing them so quickly at him. I didn't recall ever having so many inquiries from him towards my life at once.

Harry's grip tightened around my hand as he pulled me towards him for comfort. My cheeks started to heat up as his thumb mindlessly ran over the back of my hand. For a moment, I wasn't sure if I should pull my hand from him or if I should just let it happen. I couldn't lie, it felt nice. I liked it.

That was until Harry had let go of my hand the minute I was closer to him. I pursed my lips to the side, crossing my arms over my chest as we continued to walk down the sidewalk back towards Nina's house.

"Sorry about that." I cleared my throat into my fist. "I don't know why he did that. That was..."

"I don't think I like people asking me questions." Harry said softly, a soft frown formed onto his lips. "I'm never sure what to say. I always feel like I'll say something I'm not supposed to."

"Let's just stay away from questions for right now." I breathed out. "Later I can help you figure out some answers to some of those questions, okay?"

"You would really do that for me?" Harry gazed towards me with a soft smile. I felt his hand rest on the top of my back. "Thanks, I really appreciate that."

"Of course." I nodded towards him. "Um... would you mind helping me pack up everything at Nina's and taking it back to my house? My landlord said they had fixed the door, so..."

"Can I walk Astro?" He said with an excited tone and a lopsided grin.

"Yes, you can walk Astro." I chuckled out.

"Then yes, I will." Harry clapped his hands together, shrugging his shoulders as he started to walk a bit faster. I watched as he excitedly blew past me, and I couldn't help but find it so cute.

Just the simplest things Harry found so exciting.

It made my heart flutter.

"Nina just texted me, they are outside waiting for us." I said as I clicked my phone off, sliding it into the back of my pocket.

I double checked through the bag, making sure I had everything for tonight. Waters, blankets, jackets, and snacks. The joints were in my purse and everything else was good to go.

"I'm a bit nervous, Aurora." Harry said from behind me, his fingers twisting his rings around slowly as he pursed his lips to the side. "After the last party we went to..."

"It's not gonna be like that party. It's just gonna be the four of us, nobody else. I promise." I tried to reassure him as I flung the bag over my shoulder. "Plus, Nina is a good judge of character. She wouldn't have Ryan around if he wasn't, right?"

"And you." He said, nudging my elbow with his. "Don't forget you."

I wanted to laugh, but I held it back. I wasn't really that interesting of a person, or good for that matter. Maybe it was just my anxiety talking, but I really didn't look at myself the way that Harry seemed to. He was much more forgiving to myself than even I was.

"Well, anyways." I cleared my throat as I headed towards the door. "Astro's fed for the night... Got everything in my bag..." I ran my hand over the fabric of it, squinting my eyes as I went through my mental list.

"You checked the bag twice now. I'm sure we have everything." Harry said as he nudged me out the door. "Now go. Shoo, shoo, out the door."

"Okay, okay." I chuckled as I locked the door from behind me. We left my apartment, seeing Ryan's truck that was parked right outside. I was glad I didn't have to walk far to meet him. Usually the streets were filled with cars, but luckily tonight it wasn't.

I packed the bag into the back before hopping into the truck. Harry came in after me, scooting into his seat before closing the door shut. It smelled like strong cologne in the truck, and when I looked over I saw a bottle that was sitting on the floorboard. It had been used so heavily that it was hard to read the label and identify the scent from where we sat.

"Harry! You came!" Nina clapped as she smiled wide back at him, her dimples prominent in her cheeks. Harry let out a nervous laugh, running a hand through his thick brown curls.

"Yeah..." He hummed. He sounded slightly unsure with his answer, but he did his best to match the excitement in Nina's tone.

Nina knew he was nervous, but we were going to try our best to make him feel more comfortable in our circle.

"Hey, what's up." Ryan's low, tangy voice came from him. My jaw nearly dropped to my lap when I heard his voice. It sounded so thick and deep. Looking at him, I didn't really expect him to sound like that.

Ryan was probably about the same height as Harry. He had dark brown hair that curled around the backside, but came outwards towards the front of his face. Brown eyes that were more golden than a deep brown.

He looked like he was meant to be with Nina from the way he looked. He just radiated Mr. Right for her. He had a very cool and relaxed demeanor about him.

"What do you go to school for, Harry?" Ryan looked in the rear view back at him as he drove off down the road.

"Uh, I major in science and astronomy." Harry nodded towards him, his fingers fiddling with the strings that frayed on his jeans. "What about you?"

"Computer Engineering." He said back. "It's boring to learn about, but it's fun to build computers."

"That's...awesome." Harry wasn't sure what to say. I chuckled at his response, shifting my weight in my seat.

"How old are you?" Ryan looked back at Harry in the mirror again. "You look young."

"Do I really?" Harry smiled cheekily as he looked down to study his body. "Well, I'm...twenty-one, so cheers. Thanks for that."

"I'm twenty-four." Ryan chuckled out at Harry's response. "You guys are practically babies."

"Hey! We are only a few years younger." Nina whined, nudging Ryan in the shoulder.

"Is twenty-four old?" Harry had leaned closely over towards me as he whispered into my ear. I let out a chuckle, glancing over to him.

"No, it's not." I whispered back to him, patting his hand softly.

"Oh..." His lip twitched up into a smile, turning his body towards Ryan again.

The place we were going to was out in the middle of nowhere, but thankfully it was only a thirty to forty-five minute drive. Harry kept staring out the window, and I could tell he was nervous from his leg lightly bouncing.

I was nervous too, honestly.

Ryan talked a lot about how he and his frat friends had parties a lot and that we should come with him. Instinctively, I had rolled my eyes at him without him seeing.

It was so weird to think about Nina dating a frat boy. He definitely had the qualities to show it by his tank that had slits down the side, paired with skinny jeans that were so tight you could basically see his dick imprinted in them.

Oh, and the backwards baseball cap was a dead giveaway.

Even with that, though, the way he talked about things so passionately made me think twice about him. When I would think about frat guys, I would mostly think about, well... dumb guys that did dumb shit and got drunk a lot.

Besides him getting drunk a lot, I had to give it to him that he was incredibly smart. Maybe there was more to him after all.

We finally pulled up to the large field. Ryan took the gravel road that led out towards the field, but then he took an unexpected hard right to drive straight into it.

Harry's brows furrowed together tightly, his fingers gripping his seatbelt as he scanned around the area from all the windows before looking at me with a curious look.

"It's okay." I whispered as I unbuckled my seat once we came to a stop.

He gave me a nervous smile as he also clicked his seatbelt off of him.

"I'll let the bed of the truck down." Ryan said as he turned the car off and then got out.

"I'm gonna help him." Nina said with a smile as she leaned back to grab the big luggage full of pillows that we had packed.

"Try not to shove your tongue down his throat by the time we get out." I chuckled, watching her face get bashful.

She left the car with a roll of the eye and a scoff, but a sly smirk spread across her face that told me she was definitely gonna have her tongue down his throat when we got out.

Harry scooted himself closer to the door, his body pressed against it as he stared out the window. Part of me felt a little bad only because I knew he was anxious to be around other people right now.

"We're gonna be stargazing." I told him softly as I scooted towards him. "Ryan seems to like you."

"Ryan is okay." He replied with his attention elsewhere, but I could tell he really meant it. Ryan did seem just okay. So far.

"C'mon, let's go outside so we can get in the bed of the truck." I nudged him softly with a smile.

He cracked a small smile back at me before opening the door. We got out of the car, and I had imagined it to be a bit colder, but it was just the right temperature. It wasn't too hot and it wasn't too cold.

We walked to the back of the car, and my eyes lit up at the sight of how comfy the bed had looked. Nina had laid down five thick blankets, with pillows scattered around for us to use if we wanted to lay down.

It was perfect.

I climbed up first, taking a spot next to Nina. Harry sat next to Ryan.

"This is so cute." I pouted, tilting my head towards the sky. "And the stars are really out tonight too."

"Tonight is gonna be so much fun." Nina chuckled as she nudged my arm. "Ryan brought some shots. Do you guys want one?"

"Yeah, they're uh... pineapple flavor." He said as he showed the small shots. They were in small clear bottles with the liquid sloshing inside.

"Sure, thank you, Ryan." I smiled as I took two from him. I glanced towards Harry out of the corner of my eye that was staring directly at the sky. He wasn't even zoning in on what was happening around him.

"Hey, Starboy!" Nina used her foot to tap Harry's thigh, a wide smile on her lips. "You want one?"

Harry looked towards Nina with a bit of a jolt, as if he wasn't expecting to come in contact with someone else. He squinted his eyes at the small bottle, then looked towards me.

I held out the second shot in my hand, a reassuring smile on my lips. "You don't have to take it. It's like the blue drink."

"Blue drink—Ah, yes." Harry chuckled nervously as he leaned forward to take it from my fingers. He examined the bottle, tilting his head side to side. "I think I will. Thank you, Ryan." He said quietly towards him as he tilted the shot towards him.

We all took the caps off of the bottle, holding it up in the air with a smile. Harry watched in curiosity, slowly raising his glass with the rest of ours.

"Cheers!" Nina chuckled.

"Cheers!" I smiled.

"Cheers." Harry repeated more shyly.

We all took the shot at the same time. Harry, though, had fallen behind. He was having a small problem with taking it all in one go and instead going with a sip.

He let out a cough, covering his mouth with his arm as he tried so desperately not to spill the shot on the blankets.

"Not a tequila man, huh?" Ryan chuckled as he hit Harry's back with a loud pop. His eyes widened, letting out another cough before shaking his head.

"It went down the wrong way, I think. Doesn't really taste the same as the blue one either." Harry cleared his throat, sending me a silly smile as he looked down at the drink once more.

"You don't have to—"

Before I could even finish my sentence, Harry took the drink and chugged it all the way down. His face scrunched as he did so, and his ring cladded fingers gripped at his jeans tightly.

"God damn, Harry." Nina laughed out. "You want another one?"

Harry shook his head with a sour look on his face as he placed the bottle to the side, waving his hand in front of his face.

"No, I think that's quite alright." He said thickly. "Maybe, uh... Later."

Watching Harry struggle with the shot was so pitiful, but I couldn't help but laugh anyways. It was funny the way he wasn't used to alcohol and the way his face twisted with the burning feeling that it left in his throat.

"We need some music!" Nina stood on the bed of the truck, placing a hand onto the roof of it before jumping over the ledge to the grass.

"Please don't turn on that electronic stuff. It gives me a headache." I begged as I watched her crawl into the driver's seat of the truck. Suddenly the music started to flow through the truck, and it got louder as she turned it up.

It wasn't too loud but just loud enough for us to hear it.

Sounds of guitars started to strum its way through the air, causing my body to start to relax more. I was thankful that Nina turned on something that we all liked. Usually she listened to really noisy music that was just too much for my brain to handle.

"Don't be a hater, Aurora." Nina pouted as she climbed over the ledge, pulling herself back onto the blankets. "You just haven't been to a rave yet, that's your problem. You should come with me sometime."

"I would rather eat rusty nails for breakfast." I teased her, crossing my arms over my chest. "Raves are not my kind of scene. You know that."

"But they could be!" She raised her arms in defense. "Don't knock it 'til you try it!"

"Babe, did you bring the joints?" Ryan nudged Nina. "Let's light up, c'mon."

"Oh, Aurora, did you roll the joints?" Nina jolted as she turned towards me with a smile. "Please tell me you did."

I rolled my eyes. "Did I bring the joints? Of course I did." I said as I brought out the small packaging from my bag. Harry shifted in his seat, staring at me curiously as he watched me bring out one of the cherry paper rolled joints from earlier.

"Fuck yes. Thank you, Aurora." Ryan smiled wide. "You're a lifesaver."

"You're gonna make my ego inflate, be careful." I teased as I placed it between my lips. I lit it with no effort, taking a slow, but long drag off of it. Smoke bellowed into the air, creating a stench of skunk immediately.

"It's been so long since I've smoked. My normal guy has been dry as fuck." Nina mumbled as she pouted her lips. "Gimme, gimme, gimme."

"So needy." I mumbled as I blew the smoke out, passing it off to her.

"Can I try some of that, Nina?" Harry said shyly, pointing towards the lit object between her fingers. "I, uh... I've never smoked before."

"Harry, you've never smoked before? No way! This is gonna be so awesome." Nina said excitedly as she scooted towards him with the joint in hand.

"Well, maybe—" I stopped Nina with my hand, taking it from her as I tsked. "Let me show him. You always end up getting first-timers way too high."

"That was one time and that shit was medical grade, okay? It's not my fault she couldn't hang." Nina pouted as she scooted back to her spot.

"Okay, whatever." I teased, handing it over to Harry with a smile. "Okay, so put your lips around this end and just take a really small hit. Inhale like you are breathing through your mouth, but uh... with your mouth closed."

Harry took the joint, staring down at the butt of it. He gave me nervous eyes for a mere moment, but I reassured him with a small pat to the knee and a nod.

He shrugged, clearing his throat before putting it to his lips. His cheeks drew in slowly, brows pinched tightly as he looked down at it.

"Hold it, Harry! Hold it in!" Nina cheered on as she laughed. "It'll get you higher!"

"Babe, you're gonna kill him." Ryan rolled his eyes, wrapping his arm around her to pull her close.

Harry took Nina's advice, but it was only for a few seconds before he started to cough up the smoke. A lot harder than he had coughed for the shot he took moments ago.

"It's okay. Hey, it's okay." I panicked slightly, taking the joint from his fingers before passing it off to Ryan from behind me. "Nina knows that's just a myth anyway. If anything, coughing will be more helpful with that." I replied, eyeing her purposely. She only winked at me in return, causing us both to giggle.

Harry was hunched over, covering his mouth as he coughed hard into his hand. I placed a soft touch to his back as I rubbed it carefully, nodding my head in understanding.

"It's normal, you're gonna cough a lot." I frowned. "Just don't listen to Nina next time. She tends to... do this to people."

He tilted his head up, his eyes slightly watery from the coughing. He let out a soft breath, rubbing at his eyes before turning towards me with an embarrassed expression.

"I didn't expect that." His voice was now raspy from the coughing fit. Harry ran a hand through his brown curls, sitting up straight as he tried to control his breathing.

"You okay?" I whispered as I found a seat next to him, putting my back against the truck with my legs stretched out.

"I feel a little weird... in my chest." He whispered back, placing a hand onto his heart as he drew in a long, slow breath. "Is this normal?"

"It's normal, I promise. You'll feel good in a second, just don't worry about smoking if you don't want to, alright? Sometimes too big of a hit can cause your chest to hurt from all the coughing." I nudged his arm. "We can just listen to music and lay here."

"No, I like it." Harry cleared his throat into his fist, shaking his head softly. His glazed eyes peered towards Nina and Ryan who were blowing the weed smoke into each other's mouth. His lips parted, shifting in his seat slowly.

"Ignore them." I whispered towards him with a roll of my eyes. "Hey! Stop hogging the weed!"

I leaned over, taking the joint from Nina's hand. She muttered something under her breath before wrapping herself back around Ryan. It was typical, I hadn't doubted they would be all over each other tonight.

Placing it between my lips, I took a slow, but long hit off of it. The smoke filled my lungs, burning my throat as I leaned back. It felt good to be smoking again, it had me questioning why I had even stopped for a bit in the first place.

"You're not gonna blow that into my mouth, are you?" Harry questioned with a nervous chuckle that followed after. I let out a soft breath, a smile curved on my lips as the smoke bellowed through my nose.

"No, don't worry."

Harry took the joint from me, taking a long draw from it. The cherry burned the wrapper as I watched him hold the smoke in before it spilled from his lips. He coughed into his hand, his eyes starting to become more and more hooded.

We sat there for sometime, listening to the music while my head leaned back against the truck to stare up at the sky. I kept glancing over towards Harry to make sure he was okay, and he was in the position that I was in. I hadn't noticed that he was staring up at the stars with me.

I had often wondered about what went through his mind. When he looked up at the stars, was he thinking about home? Was he contemplating? Was he thinking the same things that I did?

His mind, from what he had shown me, was beautiful and dark. It was ironic in a way, the way that he could look so happy on the outside, but yet have so many doubts and insecurities about himself. I could only wish that he would see himself the way that I saw him.

But I supposed other people could say the same thing about me as well.

I glanced towards him once again, seeing that he was looking directly at me. I bit back a smile, turning my head to look at him fully. His blood-shot eyes crinkled as he smiled at me, his dimples poking out. I parted my lips, my fingers tapping on my thigh.

"I–"

"You know what!" Nina said as she leaned up from Ryan's arms, spreading her arms out with a wide smile.

"I'm scared to ask." I mumbled softly. The high was now setting in, I could tell from the way my words were slightly slurred with the threat of giggles and my voice became lazy and raspy.

Nina tsked at me, leaning over to grab her purse as she sat it into her lap. Harry and I watched curiously as she brought out a small baggy that had small square foils in it. I wasn't a fool, I knew exactly what it was.

"Are you guys ready to really party?" Nina smirked as she handed me two hits of acid on their own pieces of foil. I stared down at them in my hand, a chuckle leaving me.

"What's that?" Harry whispered towards me, his brows pinching together tightly. I glanced out of the corner of my eye, nibbling on my lip carefully.

"This is acid." I said as I took the small pieces of paper out of the foil, placing them directly onto my finger. "It will make you feel really good. Colors will be a lot brighter and it's like, you're one with the Earth."

"I think I already am one with the Earth, Aurora." Harry chuckled, glancing towards Nina and Ryan who were already putting the hits onto their tongues.

"Do you wanna do it? You don't have to. I know it's all a lot at once, especially for someone not used to it." I turned towards him, holding my palm out. Harry looked down into my hand, his brow perking up. I knew Harry had never done anything like this before, but I would rather him do it with me than some random person he didn't know.

He would be a lot safer with us. With me.

"Uh..." He scratched the back of his head, pursing his lips. "What's it going to feel like?"

"You'll have to figure it out on your own. It's different for everyone, but just imagine pure bliss and euphoria." I placed a hit onto his finger, then one on mine as well. "Here, you can put one on my tongue and then I'll put one on yours."

"How long do you leave it on your tongue?" Harry frowned, looking down at the paper with curiosity.

"Just for thirty minutes or so and then you spit it out or swallow it. This kind doesn't dissolve." I told him as I raised my finger towards his mouth. "Open your mouth."

Harry let out a giggle, opening his mouth slowly before sticking his tongue out. I watched him in awe, a smile spreading across my lips before I did the same thing. I placed the hit onto his tongue, and he placed one on mine.

I closed my mouth, letting it settle on my tongue and making sure not to swallow it before I could give it time to kick in. Harry settled back against the truck, placing his hands into his lap as he brought his tongue back into his mouth. He stared down into his lap, not really saying much after that.

"Are you ready to really see the world now, Starboy?"

a/n: heyyy. just a reminder in case you didn't see sunny or i talk about it, but we're no longer doing scheduled updates. it had just gotten too much and this way makes it less stressful honestly. we still love starboy and are continuing to work on it, but we're allowing ourselves a little more freedom with it so i hope everyone understands! we also hope you guys still stick around and continue along the starboy journey with us <3

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kwritingbooks · 2 years

Text

co-written by me & @shroombloomm

read on wattpad or tumblr masterlist

While psychedelics aren’t anything new to people like Aurora and Nina, it’s a whole new world for Harry. The world is constantly shifting around them, causing light to shine on things that was once hidden in the dark. How things can change with just one small tab…

AU: star-being!harry x astronomy-student!aurora

Content warning: substance use (acid, alcohol, and weed)

AURORA’S POV

I wasn't sure how long it had been since we first placed the tablets of acid on our tongues. All I knew was that at some point our regular conversations turned into fits of laughter that caused our cheeks to hurt. It was as if there was no off button and all we could do was let it take control over our bodies– clutching against our stomachs from the pain of happiness.

My guess was that it had been at least an hour since, considering that I could feel my high climbing. Both Harry and I's backs were laid out on the bed of the truck, still unmoved from the spot we had initially been in. I could hear the faint chatters below us, assuming that at some point Ryan and Nina had crawled out of the truck bed and laid on the ground below us. I think I preferred it that way. It gave the familiarity of her voice nearby but with the closeness of Harry to my left. That on top of the vastness above enveloping us together in one was just about as perfect as it could get.

Looking up at the night sky was always something that I found great comfort in. The way I could see the flicks of light flash faintly in the far distance, while others shined as bright as they did every other night before. But, those were my thoughts even when I was sober.

All of my appreciations and perspectives changed with hallucinogens clouding my reality. What was already so beautiful heightened to lengths that I didn't know were possible. Each time felt like a whole new experience, no matter if I was doing the same thing regardless. Under this new perspective, the stars danced in all their forms. They waltzed, they tangoed, they did ballet. They lived just as we did.

Each dance reflected against everything above, including the clouds and the moon. The individual stars were there with their own performances in order to entertain the moon, I figured. Yet, I felt like the only audience member that was taken aback by the show above me. The moon and I gazed together to encapsulate everything going on. It felt like a hug from far away, as if they outstretched their beams of light around my body into the warmest of hugs.

It was beautiful, to say the least. My lips had grown that familiar tug of fatigue from the smile that had drawn so tightly on my face. It was the only thing I knew how to do at that moment. It was the only thing I wanted to do. Needed to do.

I crooked my head to Harry's side, curious how he was doing. I knew I felt great, but I also knew what to expect from it as well. Harry, on the other hand, had no idea. This was his first time after all. I couldn't imagine what he was feeling considering he only ever started experiencing life on Earth fairly recently on top of now experiencing in this new way.

"You okay?" I breathed out softly, peering at him.

He had a hand rested neatly on top of his chest and I watched closely as it rose and fell with his breaths. They looked slightly uneven, possibly a little quicker than his usual pace.

He nodded his head with a small smile, matching our eyes together. "I don't know what exactly is happening, but I think it's nice. It feels nice. Even my clothes feel nice."

I couldn't help but giggle as my eyes ventured towards his other hand that was trailing along the fabric of his shirt. It looked smooth as he rubbed it between two of his fingers and eventually retracted it back to meet his other hand on his chest.

A hardly noticeable layer of sweat had grown on his forehead since the last time I had looked over. If it wasn't for his calm demeanor with his tone, I would have thought he was anxious about what was going on. His tongue would periodically lick over his lips as he looked above him. He seemed just as awestruck by the beauty beaming down on us as I was.

He quickly turned back towards me, now with a slightly concerned look on his face. "Aurora?"

"Yes, Harry?" I almost blushed as his name came out of my mouth so seamlessly. It was like it tickled against my lips as it escaped them, leaving butterflies to flutter out with it.

"Is this the weed, alcohol, or acid?" He drummed his fingers against his chest, darting his eyes around us. He moved them slowly around, like he was trying to take in all of the scenery closely– from the metal of the truck to the blanket underneath us to the water bottle that had been knocked over in the corner. He wanted to see and experience it all.

I chuckled. "It's all of it. Everything, it's all one." I hummed a satisfied breath as I switched my head back above, closing my eyes briefly. I could hear faint gusts of wind brushing along the trees along with Harry's breath beside me. It was as if it was his breaths causing the leaves to brush against one another from so far away.

"But mostly the acid." I joked, concealing a small laugh inside.

"Interesting." Harry responded matter-of-factly. "Does it get stronger than this? I feel like I'm climbing almost. Like my brain."

This giggle was much harder to conceal. "This is just the beginning, Harry. But, it'll be fun, I promise. Just sit back and enjoy the feelings right now. You'll know when you're there." My eyes remained shut, listening in on all the noises around. Harry had grown silent again, but his lack of questioning was usually a good sign. He was enjoying it just the same.

"What do you mean nothing matters? Anything can matter if you want it to. That's the whole point!" I heard Nina ramble below. I could tell by the way she was talking she was waving her hands around like she normally did when she went on her philosophical talks. I smiled to myself as I pictured the image in my head. She always had a way to bring up these things, especially when drugs or alcohol were introduced to the table.

"We're all just a little speck of dust in the grand scheme of things. If we were to just evaporate into dust, it wouldn't change anything about the universe." Ryan rebutted. I heard Nina let out an exasperated laugh as he continued. "Hell, if this one universe evaporated, then what? Exactly! There's so many that it would hardly change anything."

I didn't have to see her face to know there was an eye-roll after that sentence. I was enjoying eavesdropping in on their conversation, playing it like a movie in front of me. I even pictured the stars having the conversation, morphing into Ryan and Nina's faces instead. Instead of the previous dances, they were bickering back and forth about the meaning of life.

It was my show after all. I got to control it.

"You're such a nihilist. It's okay to find meaning in your own life. It's okay just to find bits of happiness in anything we want to. It doesn't have to have a big meaning behind it." Nina retorted.

The star that I envisioned her as was directly in front of me, burning bright in the middle of other fainter stars. Her words caused her brightness to only increase as I sunk deeper in the truck bed, watching.

What she was saying was something that I agreed with, but I didn't put much thought into it before. Whenever she would try to pull me into one of her life talks, I would usually tell her that I just wanted to enjoy my high and not have an existential crisis. But, there didn't have to be a crisis if I didn't want there to be one. That was one thing I never considered.

I morphed my life how I wanted based on the choices I made and found meaning in. Every little "yes" I said or "no" I said to things led me exactly to the spot that I was in right now. If I didn't choose to listen to my parents about their interest in astronomy, I wouldn't have continued this path. Maybe I wouldn't have gone to this school at all– never to have met people like Nina or Harry once in my life.

Maybe I would have majored in marketing. Or business. Or something else that would have piqued my non-astronomical-interested brain at the time.

That was semi-hard to imagine. Besides the fact that this had consumed so much of my life, it was hard to imagine that I could have lived a life so different. A few months ago, never would I have thought that I would be tripping acid with Harry– let alone the fact that he was a being that lived among the stars.

Coming to terms with that felt like a trip all in itself.

But, it wasn't. This was my reality because I made it my reality. I found solaceness in the little things that led me here. In this truck bed.

"It would go noticed if your universe evaporated, by the way." Harry whispered in my direction.

It almost shocked me, forgetting that I was lying beside him. I was so enwrapped with the conversation going on beneath us, that it felt like I was the only one who existed in this reality for a moment.

I turned to look at him as he laid unchanged in his positioning, continually drumming his fingertips over his hand. His one sentence made me feel the most comforted I had felt all night. There was no arguing with a being that knew all the secrets about the stars and the universe it surrounded. He knew it all, and I believed him.

"I think I'm starting to feel it, Aurora. Things are moving." He scrunched his eyebrows, squinting at the night sky above. He seemed to be over the existential debate, now focusing on himself now. "At least I don't think that's normal. I don't remember them moving before. Is that supposed to happen?" His voice was still a whisper, growing quieter the more he spoke. I couldn't hold back another fit of giggles as I watched him so focused.

"That's a part of it. Everything will feel stronger– your emotions, your sensations, things around you. Let your body and mind speak for you." I reminded him.

"My mind is telling me that I'm floating. Almost like I'm back home. It's nice. I wish I could take you to show you." He whispered a little louder this time. It was hard to fight against the small stab of disappointment I felt when he said it. It reminded me that I could only live out his experiences through the stories he told— never to experience it myself.

His hands patted beside him like he was double-checking to make sure he wasn't actually floating. A satisfied hum left his lips once he realized he was still where he last put himself.

"Also I feel all my clothes on me." He said it with a confused spark with his words. "I know I'm wearing them, but they feel funny. Softer, maybe. Smooth? Or is it scratchy?" He battled with himself as he attempted to word how he was feeling. I had yet to say anything, completely enjoying watching him talk himself through what he was going through.

"But it feels good, right?" I smiled at him. His hands were smoothing along his body, lightly tugging at it as he experienced the different sensations.

He nodded his head. "I think so."

"Good. It's okay to feel things. Feel as much as you want, it's your reality—your choice. You shape how you feel, especially tonight. It's all up to you how you want it to go." The words rolled off my tongue as I said them, reassuring myself in the process.

My choice. Always.

But especially tonight.

"Really?" He sounded so innocent as he asked, causing my cheeks to burn.

For some reason, I almost wanted to cry. Not out of sadness, though. Happiness. It flowed through me so powerfully and it was hard to contain it. I felt so at peace in these moments I currently shared with him. All I wanted to do was sit there forever.

"Really." I repeated with a slight blur of tears rimming along my eyes. I blinked them away, spinning my head around.

"We'll be back!" Nina rushed out, causing me to sit up quickly from my spot. She had Ryan's hand in hers, giggling among themselves as she pulled him away.

I watched as they disappeared into the field. I rolled my eyes at them, sinking back down into the bedding that cushioned from under us. I let out a soft breath, focusing back onto the stars.

The music from the truck lulled from behind us, but it was so much quieter than it was when Nina had first turned it on. Guitars sounded through the speakers, making the truck vibrate from under us.

"What is the meaning to life?" I whispered from under my breath, glancing towards Harry out of the corner of my eye before rolling my head to look at him. Harry's eyes widened just slightly, a smile curved onto his lips as he let out a soft chuckle.

"Heavy question, Aurora." He whispered back, shifting his hips slightly as his fingertips ran up and down his torso slowly. "I can't say that I know."

"You are, y'know...other-wordly, so I just thought–"

"Star-being." He stopped me, rolling his head to gaze towards me. "I am a star-being, but even I ask myself these questions. You may think that we hold answers to those kinds of questions, but in reality, we are just as lost as humans. In our own ways."

He paused for a moment, licking over his lips as he furrowed his brows carefully. His features became more bright, more clear when I looked at him. Like, really looked at him. I may have stolen a glance or two from him before, but really looking at him now, it was intense.

"Why are we made so differently?" Harry whispered lowly as he searched my face for any answers. "What is the difference between me and you? Really. We just live on other planets, and other than that, we feel things the same way it seems."

"People don't see you the way I see you." I whispered back to him as I rolled onto my side, blinking hard. "They don't see the Harry that I do."

Harry parted his lips, brows pinched as he gazed at my features. There was a silence between the both of us, for what felt like eternity. In reality, it was only mere moments, but with Harry everything felt like an eternity. Maybe time had stopped, just for us, so we could live in this moment longer together.

His features started to blur together, but not in a way that made him unrecognizable. It was almost as if he had stars that personally kissed alongside his cheekbones. Looking at him was like looking at someone I had known for so long. He felt so familiar to me, and it made my chest shift in a way that was like butterflies rattling in a cage.

And maybe it was that I had known him for as long as it felt. Maybe each time I sat underneath the stars, I was with him and didn't know it. Each time I felt drawn to a specific sparkle above, it was him looking down at me, watching me grow up. Maybe he didn't even know it himself either.

His brown curls that fell into his face looked like someone had taken a colored pencil and sketched them themselves. I looked down to my fingers, wiggling them to make sure that I was still here. That I was really, actually here.

For a moment, it didn't feel like I was. It felt like I was somehow making this up in my mind, and it was playing out in front of me. I waved my hand lazily, watching the tracers of it blur in front of me.

"I'm really high." I swallowed thickly as I rolled onto my back. I ran a hand through my hair, trying to steady my breathing. Behind my eyelids, it wasn't any better than what I was seeing when I opened them.

There were lines of reds, blues, and purples that exploded into the air. Patterns floated around the back of my eyelids, as if I had paid for my own personal psychedelic show. I let out a shallow breath as I went to place a hand onto my heart, but was caught off guard by someone else's touch.

I opened my eyes carefully, looking above me as I saw Harry's hand interlocked with mine, lacing them together. I blinked hard, watching it morph into one colorful abstract blobs. I fixated my eyes towards him with a slight frown on my lips.

"It's okay, Aurora." He whispered softly as his thumb traced over the top of my hand. "Come with me, yeah?"

Harry sat up from the pillows, his hand still interlocked with mine as he crouched on his feet. I blinked slowly, sitting up to meet his height.

"Where are we going?" I breathed out. When I looked out to the field, it was a little intimidating. The stars lit up the field all the way to the treeline of the woods. The trees danced with each other as the wind gusted against our skin to cool us down.

"We–" He said as he jumped down to the grass, a small smile on his lips. "Are going to create our own reality."

I gazed at him in awe. His smile was brighter than usual, thanks to the acid, but it was gorgeous. If it was any brighter, it may have blinded me. Even in the dead of Fall, he made my skin feel like it was Spring, surrounded by bursts of colors and refreshing air. His laughter that sung deep within him could raise lilacs and daisies from the driest of gardens.

He was a magnet, something I couldn't stay away from. A warm feeling flushed through my body as I felt my heart pull me towards him.

I crawled towards the end of the truck bed, taking his hand into mine as I jumped down. My feet hit the grass, and I let out a slow breath. I knew I was okay, but it was the high that was getting to me.

Maybe I was a little too high after all.

I looked down at the grass, watching the flecks of blades melt from under me. The wind that brushed my skin felt like a gentle hug, and when my blood-shot eyes flicked towards Harry, he stood close to my side. His presence warmed my insides, and my heart knocked against the bones of the cavity that homed it.

"Are you coming with me, Aurora?" His voice rang into my ear as he held our hands up together. I blinked hard, taking a step towards him as my grip tightened around his hand and nodded with a weak smile.

The euphoria I felt when he took off into the field nearly drowned me into a pool of happiness. Our hands interlocked with one another as we ran through the field, my mind that was once too overwhelmed with feeling, now became filled with the purest cocktail of dopamine and serotonin.

I watched the grass as my feet pranced through, and with each step, my feet melted into the dirt. My body felt like it was bouncing on a trampoline, reminding me of when I was a kid and my mom had bought me a small one to put out in the backyard for the summertimes.

Tops of the trees looked like they were breathing with each inhale I took. I let out a childish laugh as I gazed towards the stars that spread across the sky. The light kissed my skin and made me feel like I was glowing. I was my own star-being. I was being brought back to a time where nothing mattered, and they hugged me close to tell me all their secrets of the galaxy.

It brought tears that brimmed my eyeline as I slowed my running down. I let go of Harry's hand, bringing myself to my knees, placing my hands onto the ground. I couldn't help but laugh. It was all so unbelievable.

Being so out in the open in nature like this was like a library, I was eager to learn about everything it had to offer. The trees sang to me as the wind blew through them, immersing me into the most ancient melody they have ever sung.

It felt as though I was knowing of everything about what it had to offer–with my entire being. I peeled away my ego, exposing my soul to the rocks and trees. In this moment, I felt my heart fall out of the cavity of my chest and dig itself deep into the roots of the Earth.

The leaves crunched from under my hands, looking up at Harry who was just a few feet away from me. His breathing was fast, placing his hands onto his hips as his chest rose up and down.

"Aurora, what're you–"

Before he could say anything else, I grabbed a handful of leaves and threw them at him. He flinched, a gasp coming from him before he laughed out. He furrowed his brows, bending down to grab some leaves before running towards me.

"No!" I laughed out, tears streaming down my face as I quickly stood upright. My feet carried me as I ran from him, but I heard him coming up on me close. The downfall of being shorter than he was was that he had longer legs to run faster.

My belly hurt from laughing, and I was nearly breathless. I almost forgot where I was, and it felt so freeing. Before I knew it, I had landed into a pile of leaves. I fell with a thud, but it still didn't stop me from laughing.

Harry came from behind me, a high pitched laugh escaping his lips as he dropped the leaves. He put his hands onto his knees, bending over as giggles spilled from his lips continuously. The leaves crunched from under me, my hands feeling the roughness of them as I let out a soft sigh.

My body sank into the pile as if it was a sinkhole that was inviting me to suffocate in it, and I grabbed ahold of Harry's arm to come down with me. The grass underneath only pulled us down deeper in order to feel the comfort of Earth enwrap us together as one.

I opened my eyes to see him already gazing at me, the moon lighting up one side of his face. His eyes sparkled, twisting the faint colors of his irises that were noticeable in the minimal lighting the moon provided.

We shared laughter, echoing back and forth as it bounced around. The chuckles ricocheted off of each other's skin, tickling us as we buried deeper into the piles of fallen leaves.

My laugh got cut short as his hand shot up to my face, skirting around faintly. It took me off guard, as he looked closely at whatever he was brushing off of my cheek. His touch lingered heavily, sending small sparks of electricity through the atoms underneath my skin. His fingers felt like puddy, melting into me as he grazed them over so quickly.

"Your hair was in the way." He whispered softly, almost causing me to forget that we were just bent over laughing moments ago. "I like to see your face."

His wording caused the corners of my mouth to curl, partially from the awkwardness of the sentence, but mostly from knowing what he meant by it.

"I like to see your face, too." I replied back to him softly. I brushed my own hand in front of him, tucking a lock of hair behind his ear that had also fallen from its usual placement.

The twists and turns of his curls sent a rumbling feeling in my chest. I almost wanted to dive into them, swimming along the ridges as if they were the mightiest waves of the sea. I wanted to drown in them, get lost in that sea of his.

Without thinking twice, I inched my body closer to his. His eyes widened momentarily, but readjusted as he found comfort in the new proximity. Shockingly, there was no awkwardness in the silence that lingered between the two of us as we gazed into one another's eyes. I looked carefully at him as he reciprocated.

I wondered if he was surveying me in the way that I was to him. I wanted to understand him. I wanted to see what his eyes saw, feel what he felt, and hear what he heard.

A small leaf danced in the wind atop his head as my eyes continued to wander along his face and I smiled, plucking it away. I watched behind him as the leaf flew away in its own dance of freedom.

Freedom was all we ever needed in life and it could mean whatever we wanted it to. Tonight I didn't have to second guess every action I took, every action I chose, every breath I breathed. All I had to do was live in the moment and take it as it came.

I found my own freedom in that.

Just do whatever I felt I was supposed to.

Before I knew it, the space between us became nonexistent. His hands wrapped around my back as mine did the same to him, pulling us so close that we were glued together. All I could think about was the way his hands gripped against my back and the way his breaths hit against my lips.

I had never been so close to him before, yet it felt like I wasn't close enough.

My mouth collided with his softly, the breaths from his nose tickling against my skin as our lips moved together. His lips were soft like the skin of a peach, his fingers digging into my back as his breathing quickened.

I couldn't believe we were kissing. It felt so right—none of it wrong. All the silent tension between us had finally been broken, and within that, I felt a weight fall off my shoulders.

My fingers got lost into his hair as I pressed our bodies together, one of my legs swinging over to lock around his hip. My lips parted right as his did, my tongue poking out to slowly trace around his bottom lip. I felt his body shiver against me, a low moan escaping from his throat.

His touch set me on fire, my body screaming on the inside for me to do something. More. More. More. My brain was skewed. I had wanted this for so long, and I hadn't even realized it until now.

His tongue met mine, delicately, rubbing the tip against it. My body temperature rose as our tongues pushed against each other's. His large hand pressed harder against my back, causing my shirt to raise. The more contact I could get of our skin together was all I craved, especially as his fingers danced underneath my shirt. He placed them at the low of my back so he could feel me as if he could read my mind.

We were both breathless with the kiss, messily kissing one another until it turned into feverish making out. I fluttered my eyes open for a mere moment, just to look at the pleasure that spread across his face, but instead was met with something even better.

It was very gentle and vague, but it was there. The outline of his body glowed a beautiful purple color. I blinked hard, making sure that it wasn't the acid that was playing tricks on me, but it was Harry that was glowing.

"Are you okay?" I whispered softly against his lips as my fingers gently rubbed through the scalp of his hair. He breathed out unsteadily, his fingers shaking against my skin as he fluttered his eyes open to look up at me.

"More than okay." He whispered back to me, gulping thickly. "It feels really good to kiss you, Aurora."

I nodded my head slowly, pressing a soft kiss to his lips. I adjusted my hips against his, and in doing so, had felt his cock that pressed hard against his pants. It was apparent, but something that I hadn't noticed when we were sharing a kiss. I looked down between us so I could get a good look at it, a smirk curved on my lips.

"I'm sorry, it's never done anything like this before." Harry whispered out, his cheeks red hot with embarrassment. "I can't seem to control it."

For a moment, I couldn't believe I had just given one of my friends a boner, but then again, I couldn't believe that we were all over each other. And to think, I was the one to give him that bliss of small excitement, one that apparently was his first. Even if it was just his first on Earth, I didn't care. It was hot.

"It's okay. I like it." I whispered to him, placing two fingers under his jaw as I made him look at me. I pressed my lips to him once more, starting to delve my tongue across his bottom lip. He let out a low moan, his tongue meeting mine to rub against.

I adjusted my hips once more to meet his hardened cock, and surely got a reaction out of him when I brushed against it. His tongue went still, his nails digging into my skin as he tried to steady his breathing once more.

I pressed my forehead against his, letting out a shaky breath as my core started to throb. He wasn't the only one that was excited. I could feel myself start to ache in pleasure. And almost as if on cue, Harry bucked his hips forward, just once, and that was it for me.

I placed a hand onto his cheek, pulling our hips together as I rocked mine against his. I knew he needed the relief, and I couldn't imagine the drastic difference in sensation that he was feeling. Harry breathed out into my mouth, his hand quickly going to my hips as he felt my core grind against his throbbing cock.

"Aurora–" He gasped out as his eyes fluttered to the back of his head, pressing his forehead against my cheek. I could hear his breathing start to pick up even quicker, his fingernails were digging so deep into my skin that I thought he was going to break the surface.

"It feels good?" I whispered into his ear, breathlessly, a moan following after it. Harry pressed an open mouth kiss to my jaw, his tongue darting out to lap up my skin carefully. I could feel my arousal spread around in my panties.

"Feels really–fuckin' good." Harry growled against my skin. His hand left my hip as it grabbed the back of my neck and clashed our lips together once more. This time he had control, something that I had never seen of him. This was most certainly a side that I never thought I would have ever seen.

I liked it. Really fucking liked it.

His hand went to the back of my ass, having a tight grip on it as his hips started to roll harshly against mine. He moaned into my mouth, sending shivers down my spine. I felt like I was on cloud-fucking-nine. If we didn't stop now, I was going to take it further–something I wasn't sure if Harry was ready for.

Placing a hand onto his chest, I slowed down the kissing until we came to a full stop. I knew myself. I knew that I would crush under pressure and potentially go further. It was Harry, someone that sparked a fire inside of me, and if anything he had a sense of irresistibility to me. I wasn't sure why, but he just did.

"I'm sorry—" He swallowed thickly, his hips coming to a full stop. I looked down between us, seeing that there was a small wet spot on his zipper. I chuckled. He was wet because of me. It was a proud moment.

I was fortunate he couldn't see the similar fate between my own legs, too.

"Don't be sorry." I said breathlessly, running my hand over his cheek slowly. He stared into my eyes with awe, a glint of adoration. I was looking at him just the same.

"I just—" He pulled from my body, leaving a cold feeling as he rolled onto his back, his eyes fluttering closed. "Give me a second to calm down."

I could have done a lot of things to take care of his problem. It was all in the open for me. I was sure, if prompted, he would have let me, but it seemed that he felt embarrassed for feeling something so strongly. Something that he may have never felt before.

"Have you ever..." I rolled over towards him, gesturing towards his boner that seemed to be calming down. "Had...sex?"

He swallowed thickly, a silence following after my invasive question. His eyes opened slowly, staring up into the sky as he placed his hands onto his chest.

"Back home, yes." He said honestly.

"Is it different?" I scooted myself towards him, placing a hand onto his. I was curious. Was the sensation different? Did they do it differently than humans?

"It's more soul binding than it is pleasurable, but I suppose that you could say that it's different—sensation wise." He glanced towards me out of the corner of his eye. "I'm not blind to the logic of how humans make love to one another, but it is very different on my planet. We can of...blend into one being, if that makes sense."

Soul binding? Blending together? It sounded interesting—almost devastatingly beautiful in a way.

"Oh, okay." I whispered out, nodding towards him. A sudden gust of wind rushed past us, now realizing how chilly it had gotten. How long had we been out here for? It felt like ages, but it couldn't have been more than an hour. Although, my drug-induced mind was never a good timekeeper anyway.

I shivered, rubbing my arms slowly. Harry looked towards me with a frown, noticing how cold I had suddenly become.

"Here." He said softly as he leaned up, pulling the jacket he had off his body before wrapping it around my back. He fixed the arms so it would cover the front of me as well.

"You didn't have to—" I tried to object, but he shook his head, putting a hand up to me.

"Being cold reminds me of home." He said softly as he sank back into the pile of leaves. "It is mostly cold where I am from, so the temperature doesn't bother me all that bad. I actually quite like it."

I hummed again softly, almost envisioning myself on his home planet. I had no idea what it could have possibly looked like, but it was fun to imagine myself walking around on my own drawn-out idea. In my mind, everyone floated in their star-being form. I figured they all resembled what Harry looked like when he showed me his true self, too. They were all beautiful as they brushed past one another. Maybe it was like one big campsite on a moon-like surface. Maybe they could even touch the nearby stars if they wanted to. Its cold touch only tickling against their own fingertips, completely unaffected by the human reality to their environment.

"Should we head back?" I broke in, shifting my attention in his direction.

He blinked at me for a second, as if he was first observing my facial features before he could process the words that came out of my mouth along with it. I partially wondered if he was still seeing the things that I was currently seeing, his face mildly shifting in the darkness. Shockingly, it didn't freak me out at all. Somehow it only seemed to highlight the beauty that was permanently etched into him.

He nodded his head. "Sure, let's go. Although, I'm not quite sure how to get back." A slight twinge of worry twirled in his already-twirling face, but I couldn't help but smile.

"It's okay. I'll get us back. C'mon." I quickly shot myself up, extending a hand down towards him.

It was slightly funny how quickly the air around us had shifted. I had almost forgotten that only moments ago we had the most intimate moment we had ever shared together. That was much more than just a simple hug. It made my stomach jolt lightly as I considered it.

It was just the drugs though, right?

Harry placed his hand into mine, shooting himself up just as quick. It sparked a newfound energy in me and I ran towards the car, giggling as I did so. I didn't look back as I heard him laugh to himself as well. I could imagine the dimples embedded into his cheeks as he grinned behind me, running to catch up.

"Hey! Wait up!" He giggled out breathlessly.

"You were given those long legs for a reason, Starboy!" I yelled over my shoulder.

I could see Ryan's truck coming up, reflecting against the moonlight that shone so brightly above. For some reason, it felt like a rush of warmth seeing it. It was like coming home after a long vacation, ready to sleep in your own bed or breathe your own air. I almost wanted to run up to it and hug it.

My arms pushed against the truck as I used it to stop myself from running into it. I turned behind me to see where Harry was, but he was much closer than I thought as he almost instantaneously met me at my other side.

"You like to run when you're on substances it seems." Harry huffed out in between heavy breaths.

"Running's fun." I smiled, breathing out just as quickly.

He snorted lightly, hanging his head between his shoulders as his arms leaned against the truck. I watched him as his body rose and fell from the influx of breaths from our little adventure. The idea that he looked so human, acted so human – but wasn't – was beyond my mind's current comprehension.

His head shot up, his brows furrowing into a frown. His sudden change in demeanor took me off guard and it made my heart feel heavy in my chest.

"Where's Nina and Ryan?"

I spun my head to the left and right of me, squinting my eyes to allow them to adjust to the distance in the dark. While the moon was shining, it didn't provide much guidance past a certain point. Plus the dancing grass due to tripping wasn't much help either.

"You think they fell asleep?" He asked again, walking off to the side as he squinted his eyes as well. "Should we call her?"

I patted my pockets, pulling the phone from my back pocket. I was a little shocked that I hadn't lost it. It was a common occurrence when I was either drunk or high, my phone always was at fault for my poor decision making during those times.

A buzzing from the truck bed sounded out as I heard the rings coming from my phone.

"Shit." I repeated as I slid the phone back in my pocket. "She left her phone here. Of course."

"What do we do?" Harry asked with a shakiness to his voice.

I didn't want to think of worst-case scenarios. I knew Nina and knew that she wouldn't do anything too stupid. She probably had just run out of view. Honestly, they were probably doing what Harry and I had started – except actually finishing it.

"I'm sure they're okay. We can wait in the truck bed for them if you want. She's done this before, she always comes back." I smiled at him in hopes to ease his nerves.

His face appeared to relax as he nodded his head, pulling himself up into the back of the truck. He leaned out one of his hands as I reached for it, pulling me up.

It was silent for a bit as we adjusted into the makeshift bed that was made. Luckily, sober me wasn't there to judge the comfort of it. I would have been lying if I said I wasn't slightly nervous because she didn't have her phone on her, but I also knew Nina. This was definitely like her, and while I didn't like it, she knew how to handle her own. She was probably having the time of her life just like we were.

"I'll stay awake and wait for her if you want to go to sleep." Harry offered behind me under the covers already.

I shook my head, giggling at him. "You sure? That sounds boring."

He shrugged his shoulders. "I don't mind. I just wanna make sure she's okay."

I smiled. I knew sleep wasn't in my near-future forecast, but it had to be approaching eventually. It was hard to resist seeing him all bundled up in the warmth of the covers I brought from home. It was a burnt orange with crochet stitching in the details. My eyes twisted around each knot, losing sight of reality again.

"Aurora?" Harry whispered out in a concerned manner, sitting up from his spot.

My eyes shifted back to him and I instinctively smiled back at him. "I'm good. Yeah, we'll do that."

His expression softened as he lowered himself back down, exposing an opening of the covers for me to join him in. It didn't take any hesitation to venture closer, shimmying my cold body into the warmth of his.

For someone who said he enjoyed the coldness of his home planet, he always seemed to be wrapped with a body temperature that was inviting in the best way. Whether it was in his hugs or when we were wrapped up together, lips clashing into one another's. Feeling his arms wrap tightly around myself only strengthened that feeling that I had initially felt upon running up to the truck.

Home.

Harry felt like home. He was my home.

a/n: long time no see!! i’ve missed u guys and starboy so much. re-reading this chapter was so :’) sunny & i went through a lot of effort with this one so i rly rly hope everyone enjoys it & thank u for sticking around with starboy <3

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