#he's not the prettiest nor is he the kindest but

[arabellasleopardcoat]

Bouquet of Violets (Aemond Targaryen x Reader)

Summary: You are happy in your marriage, even if your husband can be quite hellish. It all starts to go wrong when a secret admirer shows up.

Warnings: Angst! Fluff! All the feelings! And yeah, mature language and topics. Canon character death (Not Aemond)

A/N: Hopelessly romantic (delusional) reader! meets Aemond. Based on a song I grew up listening. The girls that get it, get it.

Aemond, unlike you, remembers the first time the two of you met. You wore your hair down, back then. It cascaded down your back in the ways girl's hair often did before they flowered, unstyled and wild.

You must have been nine, or ten years old. He was twelve and having a temper tantrum, hiding in the corners near the throne room. Your father was in an audience with King Viserys, while you and your mother explored the Red Keep. Aemond had never found out what the meeting was about, nor did he care.

Your mother was dressed in brightly colored robes, matching your father’s. You were still dressed in the frocks of childhood. Your small, bony shoulder, had hit him right on the ribs as your mother walked you down the hallway, and Aemond had been ready to give you the tongue lashing of your life. Yet, something had halted him.

When you had bumped into him, you had raised your gaze, to meet his. Back then, he didn’t wear the eye patch, the scar tissue too raised to do so. Instead of flinching back at the gruesome sight of the marred flesh, as most people did, you had offered him a kind smile.

“I apologize. I didn’t mean to.” Your sweet smile lit up your whole face. You were not the prettiest girl he had ever seen, all awkward limbs and missing a tooth. But you were the kindest. As you fell back into step with your mother, clutching your doll, Aemond could not help but be charmed by you.

So many years have passed that Aemond does not recall what your mother and you were talking about. What he does recall are another two things: First, that you were sheltered. You referred to a pet of some sorts as your friend. Second, you were clearly hung up on the notion of marriage.

Later, he would realize that The Stranger had not touched your family yet. While you might have been familiar with the notion of death, as many children were, but had not fully grasped the troubles of mortality. That was why you were concerned over the thought of what would happen to your pet when you married.

Your mother replied something along the lines of them going with you, but the doubt was clear in her tone. She was uncertain about the prolonged longevity of your childhood companion.

Sometimes Aemond thinks of how much you must have wept when they passed. The idea of you being so distraught over something you loved makes his heart ache in a weird way.

Darkly, he thinks of how you will react once he is dead. He knows his chance of surviving this are low, especially now. Will he merit as many tears as your pet did?

The words your mother last spoke before the two of you disappeared down the hallway were forever etched in his memory.

“The man who loves you will respect everything you love and hold dear. Remember that.”

You came to him with no pet. But he would have taken in an entire farm if you had.

The next time the two of you had crossed paths, Aemond had liked you even more. You were beautiful. Having long left behind the styles of childhood, your hair was worn up as a proper lady. It made it easier to admire your eyes, magnetizing and intelligent.

You were fond of reading and writing. When he saw you again, your nose was buried into a book. It was not philosophy, or history, or any useful subject, really. You read love stories, fairy stories and all sorts of things. Literature and poetry and children’s tales all rolled into one.

It was your mother, who encouraged that passion of yours. Despite being married to a man who was much older than her, and less educated, she had found happiness in him. She looked at the world in a rather unique way. One you had inherited.

You had been taught to read at an early age. According to your mother, education was the greatest equalizer between men and women, even if she didn’t voice it around your father. He didn’t know his letters very well, and so, had little clue about what books you choose to bury your nose in. If he had known, he would have disapproved.

Most men would have, truly. No one wanted young maidens to get unrealistic ideas about how marriage was supposed to go. Yet, when Aemond himself had the chance to put a stop to it, he found himself unable to.

If Aemond was to be honest with himself, he would have said he enjoyed it. The way your face would get all dreamy, your sighs so sweet, as you progressed on your reading and imagined a love like the ones in your books. Perhaps it had been the reason, in some misguided attempt to appeal to that side of you, he started doing this.

Your second meeting, which you thought had been the first, had not been due to chance. When Aemond was told it was time to marry, the choice came to your family or the Baratheons. He had never been one to protest his duties, no matter how opposed he was to it. But on this, he put forth his own selfish conditions. Aemond would marry you and no one else.

His mother had had to insist to your parents, unwilling to give up their precious daughter in times of political unrest. It was no secret to anybody that upon the death of King Viserys, things could turn ugly. It made your family wary of marrying you to Aemond.

Never before had he cursed his parentage so much. By then, Aemond had not seen you in years, but he knew you were the only choice for him. Kind and unafraid at ten, you could have only grown into a wonder.

And you did. The more he gazed at you, during that second encounter, the more he discovered. Unfortunately, Aemond had not been taught how to speak with maidens, much less one he wanted so badly.

Unused as his lips were to speaking kind words or flowery speech, he found himself in absolute terror of doing or saying the wrong thing. When he had wanted something in the past, he simply commanded it. Aemond was not used to wanting to keep a woman, but he guessed it took more effort than that.

His mother berated him all the way home. In his fear of his words upsetting, he had ended up not saying anything at all.

“You picked her yourself, Aemond, and barely showed excitement over it. The poor girl must think you hate her.”

And you probably did. Aemond could tell that you felt your encounters were awkward, but you slowly started getting used to him. What charmed him the most had been that never once you were afraid.

It ended up becoming a routine. Sort of a play date, but for adults. Set up by your hopeful parents, you would meet each other weekly and sit in silence. Each time, you would walk in with a pep in your step, wearing pretty gowns and smiling.

You would try to engage him in conversation, but he felt too self-conscious for it. It didn't phase you. You suffered through exactly two rounds of awkward conversation before starting to bring books. Sometimes, they were two, one for him and one for you. But his favorite times were when you brought only one and read aloud to him.

You had a very pleasing voice. You pronounced your words carefully, and in an even tone. And you would always ask for his opinions on the chapter when you finished. It made conversation much easier.

Any other woman would feel unhappy at having to go through such efforts. Astoundingly, not you. Overall, you seemed happy, and it puzzled Aemond to no end. Asking you had not proven very enlightening either.

“Of course I am happy.” And you had given him a smile so bright, he was convinced you were not actually your parent's daughter, but rather, the daughter of some old god of the light. “We are a good match. We like books. And you are a Prince, good with the sword, and very learned. Why wouldn't I be happy?”

Practical. No matter how romantic the books you read, or how magic the stories you enjoyed, your answer had been purely practical. You deserved more. A loud love story, like the ones in your books, and not a quiet life, spent in the shadows of a man who could barely pay her a compliment.

You gave a little spin, awed at the way your skirt moved and spread. It was the softest cloth you had ever felt, in cream and gold. Queen Alicent had gifted it to you along with many other pieces for your trousseau. You were to marry a Prince, and so, no expense was spared in updating your garments and linens.

What an honor it was, to have such a caring mother-in-law. Having witnessed the poor relationship between your mother and grandmother, you were thrilled over it. You had heard Queen Alicent had asked for you specifically, believing your temper to be a good match for her son. Since the announcement of the betrothal, she had been nothing but doting, if a bit overly worried about his treatment of you.

And Prince Aemond. You truly had no complaints. He was a tad too stoic for your liking, but he was never unkind to you. Despite the rumors about his fearsome character, you had found him to be very handsome.

Your first impression of Aemond was that he was tall. He was all long vertical lines in black and white. A study in contrasts, if you wish. One that, were you an artist, would have your hands itching for some coal. The only pop of color was his eye, a pale blue that shone on his handsome face.

He lacked the boyishly handsome features most men your age had. Instead, much like art, he was divisive. The eye patch that should lessen his appearance, only contributed to his uniqueness. There was something in the way he smiled, too. Something that hinted to something darker, dormant under the surface.

It was both attractive and intimidating. His stoic, aloof nature reminded you a lot of the leading men of the books you read. Your knowledge of that sort of man, through literature and observation, hinted to you that your betrothed must be more than met the eye.

What sort of passions and secrets must be hiding under his cool facade? You could not wait to find out. You imagined growing old with him, slowly learning his secrets and tells, just like your mother had done with your father.

The story of your parents' betrothal and marriage was one you knew well. As a child, you asked to hear it every night before bed. Your mother had been engaged to him being quite young, while he was already a man. He had been patient with her, but not very affectionate. Slowly, she had worn down his defenses, and gained his trust. It had taken years, with your father being a very gruff man. But they were the most loving couple you had ever met.

You yearned for something like that. A love that was built on mutual respect and trust, something that grew with you and filled your house with children and laughter. And with Aemond, you could not help but think that it would be possible. Wasn't he, too, a cold man who treated his bride kindly but never with affection?

You smiled at your reflection. You made a lovely bride if you said so yourself. Eyes full of hopes and expectations for your future marriage and the family that you would soon start, face glowing in happiness. One day, you said to yourself, as your Lord Father came to escort you towards the Sept, I will tell this story to my daughter.

Prince Aemond waited for you at the altar. It was a small gathering, your wedding. There were his siblings, mother, and grandfather and your parents. Your stomach tightened up in nervousness and excitement. You hoped he found you as beautiful as you found him.

When his eyes met yours, he gave you a small little smile. Secret, and barely there. You felt tears starting to well up in your eyes. You were so nervous, but so happy. This was the beginning of your new life, you could feel it.

You finally reached him. Aemond seemed startled at your tears, his hands coming to clasp yours almost in instinct. You gave him a bright smile. How kind, your betrothed was. He might have trouble expressing it, but for this, no words were needed.

You could see your nerves reflected on his face. Your hands squeezed harder. Aemond mimicked the gesture. There was a sense of understatement there that had previously been absent from your encounters. During the whole ceremony, neither of you let go or stopped looking at the other. As he leaned in to kiss you, you met him halfway.

This kiss had featured in your dreams for quite a while. As a young girl, when your lessons with your Septa got particularly boring, you daydreamed about the day you would marry. In your head, it was always perfect, and the kiss felt magical. You were a bit embarrassed to admit it, but once you met Aemond, your daydreams turned a bit less innocent.

The kiss fulfilled one of your fantasies, and left the other lacking. Aemond gently cradled your face in his hands and kissed you, very tenderly. His lips felt slightly dry, but he kept his motions gentle and sweet. It was a perfect as your childhood self had imagined, with the guests even clapping at the end. Unfortunately, it was just as innocent.

Considering that, and the fact that Aemond had demanded there not to be a bedding ceremony, you had correctly guessed your wedding night would be spent on your own.

The consummation of your marriage would be a challenge in itself. Aemond didn’t seem too keen on touching you with a ten-foot pole, and you weren’t sure of how one should bring up the topic.

Despite it, you were happy. Your only task was hanging on his arm at important feasts, which were few and far in between. His father’s declining health meant there was little to celebrate.

Your days often went without even seeing your husband, but you were never lonely. There were gardens to be walked, and books to be read. There were even tiny, blonde children, that you could chase around in the gardens and tickle. They were not yours, but Princess Helaena's and Prince Aegon's, yet they shared the striking silver hair your husband had. Looking at them, tiny sticky hands and still smelling like babies, you could imagine the future with your husband.

You could spend hours playing with them, or having tea with the Queen. You enjoyed trailing after her, she was always very kind. Frequently, you wondered how she and Aemond could be so alike yet so different.

The only thing that broke your routine were the times Aemond requested your presence.

“Milady.” Your handmaid said, stepping lightly inside your chambers. “The Prince has requested that you go to him.”

Instantly, dread and excitement pooled in your stomach. As a young lady, you were both fearful of the act and excited by it. Too often, you had heard it was something hurtful, but that it marked the change into womanhood. When Aemond called, you couldn’t help but wonder if this was the night he made you a woman.

You rushed to take out a nightshirt from your trousseau. You had separated them into three categories. There were ones that you wore nightly, others that were slightly bigger that were saved for an eventual pregnancy, and the ones that were for Aemond. Those were the prettier ones that your Lady Mother had purchased to help you entice your husband.

It was always one of the latter that was chosen. You hated not being prepared, so you always made sure to look pretty and be clean. Just in case. It had not happened yet, but it didn't mean it never would.

Your handmaid aided you to put your robe on, followed by your slippers and a thick cloak. The Red Keep, despite being inhabited by dragons, was always cold. Your handmaid always walked you to his chambers, and this night was not the exception.

She left you at his door, after you were announced. Aemond himself opened his door, welcoming you inside.

You had gotten better at not staring at him. Despite his state of undress, in only sleep pants and his hair down for once, he was a delight for the eyes.

“My lady.” He kissed your cheek. The door closed after you. He aided you out of your cloak. “I was hoping you would read for me tonight.”

You tried not to let your disappointment show on your face. Aemond, as if sensing your mood, merely shoved a book in your hands. He didn’t even offer you a seat, but you took one on the bed anyway. By the weight of the book, you would be here a while.

“On a far away land, whose name I am unable to recall…” Aemond settled down on the bed next to you, eye closed. You didn’t understand why he did this sort of thing, but you weren’t bothered by it either. It was a small price to pay for all the luxuries you got to enjoy.

Despite ending up with a sore throat, it was fun too. He picked the books now, in a stark contrast to the days when you had been a couple courting. And as a man, Aemond had access to many more books than you had. You had recently started making your way through some chivalry tales, with a lot more blood than you were used to.

It was enough for you. Perhaps he was not very affectionate, but he clearly enjoyed your company. Why else would he keep summoning for something as menial as reading books?

You settled into a comfortable routine, grounded by the rhythms of court life. For a while, everything was extraordinarily normal. It was not until you were three months into marriage with the Prince that things started to get weird.

It was the ninth day of the tenth moon of the year, and the date felt slightly ominous. There was a restless energy in the air, something unusual. Perhaps, it was you. As of late, you had been feeling a bit blue. The lack of letters from your family and the twins starting their lessons had left you with more spare time than you thought you would have.

Deciding to go have a bath to try to shake that restless energy from you, you headed toward your rooms. When you entered, the first thing you noticed was the smell. It was strong and floral like, permeating the surrounding air. Your maids used sweeter smells for your rooms, on the Queen’s advice. They were the sort of smells that Aemond favored, and so, she had hoped surrounding you with them would endear you to him.

Then, you saw them. It was a big bouquet of violets, laying on top of your bed. Delighted, you ran towards them. You were unable to resist the urge to smell them, breathing in their scent. This close, you noticed they were slightly bluer, closer to dark blue than purple.

You toyed with their petals, wondering where they could have come from. Perhaps your husband? Aemond was not very inclined towards romantic gestures, but there was no other explanation for it.

You were nearly bursting in excitement to see him. The flowers had been such a kind gesture, you could not help but feel a wave of affection. But no matter how much you wished for it, you had seen nor hide nor hair of Aemond.

Denying it was stupid on his part. Aemond will not protest against it. But what else could have he done? He had panicked. It's not like he meant to do so.

His mother held a weekly meal with all her children, and had taken to including you. Having often berated him about his treatment of you, it was not surprising that she had decided to take you under her wing.

Aemond did feel a bit guilty over his own coldness, but he wasn't really sure how he ought to behave. Apart from his sister and uncle, he had not seen many loving pairs during his life, and anyone would agree that Rhaenyra and Daemon should never be held up as examples of anything.

You were lonely, as of late. The twins had gotten old enough for lessons, and so, they had limited time to play with you in the gardens. You were far enough from home that the letters took a few days to reach you, too. As a young woman, almost too young to be forced to leave everything you knew behind, isolation must have been taking its toll.

Let's not forget you were not only two years his junior, but also a woman. You were of a fragile disposition, with your constant daydreaming and romantic thoughts. Aemond ought to have been paying more attention, but his mind had been busy elsewhere.

His father looked more and more close to death with each day that passed. His grandisre was constantly plotting. Without needing to be a seer, Aemond knew that things were not looking good. There would not be a peaceful reign for Rhaenyra.

He had been so caught up on his worries and duties, that Aemond had forgotten to take care of his woman. Aemond had not summoned you to his rooms that week, too wired to project the calm you would need in the days that would come. You would not do well if a war broke out.

Aemond had been quite lacking on his duty of taking care of you. Pretty little flower that you were, he could almost see you starting to wilt. You spent more time indoors, and stopped your daily walks in the gardens.

Despite fairness being regarded as a desirable trait for a lady, Aemond did not like the way your skin had lost its sun kissed glow. It just didn't fit you. Blue was more of his thing than yours, gorgeous golden woman that you were.

Hence, the flowers. Choosing the violets was an impulse. Aemond liked the colors and the smell was tolerable yet distinctive. He would know immediately when you received them, being able to smell them on your hair and clothes.

Sweet natured as you were, you had thanked him for them. The fact that you had liked them and associated them with him had been enough to warm his heart. The fact that you had decided to do so during the dinner with his siblings, enough to stomp on it.

It had not been quiet enough.

“Aemond?” Aegon frowned. “Aemond gave you flowers?”

Knowing his brother as he did, Aemond knew he was struggling hard to contain his laughter. He had been the butt of the joke too many times to confirm or deny anything. He would rather not be embarrassed in front of you.

But in truth, the idea of being weak, of being mocked, was not one that scared him. He had been humiliated many times during his childhood. What bothered him more was the thought of his feelings for you being exposed in such a manner. He was not prone to sudden bursts of affection, or doing thoughtful things for those he loved.

Aemond preferred to love in silence. There was no need for grandiloquence, or big gestures. Marriage was a sacred thing, between husband and wife. It was not something that had to be shared loudly. His love was spoken quietly, in the same way he had been taught to.

His mother loved quietly. His grandsire did, too. Their eyes spoke when their lips did not, their love a discordance with the words out of their mouths. Aemond had grown like that, loved but never told, learning it as a secret language that tied them all.

The flowers, though. The flowers had been a betrayal of their code. Something they would not understand because while everyone in the Red Keep was fluent in the art of loving and not saying a word, you were not. You were a foreigner, with your tales of romance and princess from a far away land.

This had been Aemond, clumsily speaking your language. Shy about it, as many people were when speaking one that was not theirs for the first time. It was hard. It was private, and certainly not something he wanted to be outed in front of Aegon, who would not know love for his wife if it hit him in the face.

His expression must have been deadly because Aegon had started squirming on his seat like his pants were on fire. Your face had fallen, turning into a terrible, sad thing, that made something funny to his heart.

“It wasn’t you. Of course.” Your voice was softer still. Aemond continued eating his dinner without a word. Because really, what could he say? Anything that he did now would be mocked by Aegon.

The way your face had fallen, brows pinching together in a sad little frown, had haunted him later. He wanted to fix things, but was unsure how. You were not used to his brusque manner and speech. Aemond felt it might do more harm than good, if he were to speak with you. He might end up offending you more without noticing.

Besides, how did one even start to explain that he had denied tacitly to gifting you flowers fearing not being understood and mocked? He would sound like a fool.

Instead, he had penned you a note. Instead of apologizing, Aemond had hoped to butter you up with a few compliments. You must have realized it, then, because you had walked the whole day as if floating in a cloud.

Come the ninth day of the next moon, you had nearly forgotten all about the incident. You had thrown away the flowers before they even had a chance to wilt, and the note had been burned to a crisp in your fireplace. You had convinced yourself having a secret admirer was improper for a married woman, and refused to give it more thought.

It was a bit strange, that your husband was not angered by it. Yet, at the same time, you supposed he was thankful for your discretion over the entire affair. Aemond was very sensible and smart, so it was logical he wouldn't blame you.

Aemond had kept summoning you to his chambers, be either for you to read to him or just to sit in silence. Your happiness persisted. Until your breakfast’s tray was set on your vanity.

You noticed it when you were sipping at your tea. Groggily, and confused, you found a piece of paper under your napkin. On a neat handwriting, there was a quote from one of the poetry books you favored.

You gave a tiny gasp. Your hands clenched on the paper, your cheeks heating up. The penmanship was not one you recognized, but the words made your knees nearly buckle. No one had written you sonnets before.

Ninth day, you realize. Same as the flowers. If not your husband, then who? The idea of the secret admirer came back, stronger this time. The dates could not be a coincidence, this had to be the same person. Ninth day of the ninth moon, then ninth day of the ten.

You started over analyzing each interaction you had with men. When the knights opened the doors for you, your eyes would linger on theirs. When a Lord would greet you, you would try to remind if he had something to do with violets.

You found yourself daydreaming of this man. Would he be an older man? Would he be prone to smiling, or would he share the stoic nature of your Prince? How would his hands feel on your skin? All the daydreaming made you feel guilty, for fantasizing about a man who was not your husband. Yet, at the same time, you knew that you would not act on it. You loved Aemond too much.

It was flattering, to be wanted in such a manner. You liked the idea of it because it was different from the love you were used to. But you would rather not meet the admirer, knowing you would have to reject him. You enjoyed the attention, not the person it came from.

There was only one person in Westeros that you wished would lavish you with attention and love. And you knew already he was not your secret admirer.

Secretly, sometimes, you thought of telling Aemond. What would his reaction be? The thought made butterflies flutter in your stomach. Would he get jealous? Would he turn more affectionate? You imagined he would want to claim you in some way.

Alone, at night, you pictured his eye, narrowed in anger. Those hands, gripping harshly at your hips, leaving bruises. His body over yours, his lips on your throat, your chest, your stomach. Your hands would follow the path that the imaginary Aemond's hands would take, caressing and groping until they reached their destination. You would arouse and tease yourself until you reached your peak, a scream of his name dying in your throat.

The wondering does not last to meet a third moon. No, because King Viserys passes away and Prince Aegon is crowned King. The whole Red Keep is in a state of disarray, and you feel oddly fearful, watching the constant movement the family seems to be in.

Even Queen Alicent, usually so kind and calm, is on edge. She seems on the verge of a neurotic episode, pacing frantically around the halls, muttering to herself. You can't help but feel something bad is about to happen.

Your husband is in a terrible mood. He seems to have a constant headache, and so, you have taken to being even more kind to him. Some nights, he will summon you to his chambers. He keeps asking you to read to him, but you can tell his mind is far away.

You try grounding him, placing your hand on his thigh or shoulder every chance you get. If you were more confident, you would try something more bold. Aemond seems to enjoy your touch, but he doesn't encourage you to do it. His face remains unmoved, and he keeps telling you to keep reading.

His only tell is that he always reciprocates. If your hand is on his shoulder, his goes to your hip. If you touch his back, Aemond caresses your hair.

It leaves you feeling a bit out of balance. It's entirely innocent, as if you were two children discovering love. Yet at the same time, you can't help but feel like you are burning up in your need for him.

He starts requesting for you to stay the night with him. Aemond never touches you beyond holding you to him, body pressed close to yours in a long, vertical line. Sometimes, you wake up to his manhood prodding you from behind, but he promptly excuses himself out of the bed you share. It makes your thighs clench up in need.

It's unbearable. You feel like you are going insane, your center pulsating in need each time you are near him. The simplest touches can set you on fire. You decide to be bolder, soon. You can't keep this state of affairs.

Before you can explore this new side of your connection, Aemond is pulled away. A mission for the King, he explains. You stay behind, feeling restless. Not having been told what his mission involved, nor where he was going, you can't help but worry. Aemond had taken Vhagar, and that, at least, gives you a slight sense of safety. You were familiar enough with his mount to know she could be his fiercest protector if she felt someone was threatening.

You spend your hours praying for his safe return, along with the Queen. While not part of the Small Council formed around Aegon, but you imagine quite well what they discussed. Alicent is as scared as you are.

You go to bed late that night. With Aemond away, you can't sleep, already used to his body pressing against yours. You had hoped exhaustion would help you overcome that problem.

It's even later when heavy footsteps and the slamming of a door rise you. In the dark, you can barely make out a silhouette. A tall man, holding a dagger.

You scream. The man grabs you roughly by the shoulders and pushes you to lay down on the bed. This close, you can feel that his clothes are strangely humid, as if dried in a rush. You had not considered it before, but the letters and violets do not seem so romantic anymore. Instead, they scare you. You find yourself faced with the possibility that this man might this be your secret admirer. Has he felt encouraged by your happiness? Is he dangerous?

There is a heavy candleholder on your nightstand. You reach for it in the dark, and swing at his head. The man yelps. You start to struggle against him. His tone is familiar to you.

“Seven Hells.” He curses. It's then that it hits you. This is Aemond. Aemond is back. You don't get to rejoice on it, or pull him to you, though. He keeps speaking, in a confused tone. “You… I… I made a mistake.”

Aemond gets up and away from you. His clothes still reek of humidity and sadness. You remain there, laying on your stomach, as you feel an uncontrollable urge to cry. There is something inside you that has been rattled until it broke, something that tells you that this Aemond is not your Aemond.

The next morning, you find out he has killed Lucerys Velaryon. Instead of going to his mother or grandsire, he had come straight for you. Aemond had been trying to forget on your skin, lose himself in you.

When you see the violets covering every inch of your room, bouquets over your bed, on your vanity and even the windowsill, your eyes sting. It's bittersweet to realize that, now that you look at them, their color is surprisingly close to a sapphire.

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Dividers by yours truly. Por supuesto que la canción era Ramito de Violetas. Grande Zalo Reyes.

[biggest-geo-oogami-enjoyer]

Uhm,,,, may I ask for geo x shy reader (whatever format you want, im just starving for geo content) (´·ω·`)

Diffidence (Geo x Shy! MC/Reader)

Thank you for the ask Anon! I had fun writing this one (albeit, as someone who isn't even remotely shy, I want to apologise if the shyness part seemed inaccurate). Hope you enjoy! :D - Signed by biggest-geo-oogami-enjoyer

Diffidence: modesty or shyness resulting from a lack of self-confidence.

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Geo wasn’t the shy type. He never was, nor ever planned to be. Unfortunately, you were.

He never understood how someone as…dare he say…beautiful and smart as you could be so insecure of yourself. Even actively talking yourself down, trying to doll yourself up to appease the gazes of people who’d never appreciate you. Not in the way he did anyway.

When Crowe first introduced you to him, and the others, you tried asking him about Hyugo, about why he even hung out with Crowe and company; and all it took for you to become antsy was a couple seconds of intense eye-contact. Sure, he was irked by the former query, but it didn't mean he was irked by YOU.

It didn’t even register in his head at the time that someone could be as shy as you. But he wasn’t planning on letting others take advantage of it.

He’s seen first-hand how cruel other people at this school can be, and he wasn’t going to let them lay a finger on you (if someone already did, they’re dead)

Everytime someone remotely dodgy approached you, asking for a favour, or for ‘help’ with ‘something’, he’d nonchalantly drag you elsewhere, ensuring that you were again safe. That you didn't have to do anything they requested of you.

He would try to be less cold with you, especially since he was starting to become extremely somewhat fond of you. 

He would make attempts to get you to join the Archery Club, so he could see you more often assist (and subtly praise) you whenever you did well; which was always. You get the bullseye each time. He trains you well. (A bit *too* well some have noticed).

He’d 110% death-stare anyone who tried talking to you after that, didn’t matter if they seemed nice or not, they aren’t trustworthy, not like him.

If you become a target of bullies? They’ll end up hospitalised. Rumours? Person who started them will magically vanish without a trace. He doesn’t care, he’s got enough money to buy this whole city and not make a dent in his funds. The city cops love a good bribe.

Tries to slowly grow closer to you during Archery, hoping that you will warm up to him, become less antsy around him; and eventually (to his unbounding relief), you start talking.

You tell him about your interests, your likes, dislikes, worst fear, what classes you had; and he’s entranced. He doesn’t even care if he spends all day there anymore, he enjoys your voice too much. Also remembers everything you tell him. 

You start talking to him more, and all he can do is relish in the fact that he’s befriending one of the kindest, prettiest, smartest people he’s ever met.

Oh, if you like Crowe? You won’t soon enough, Geo will make sure of that. He won’t harm Crowe’s reputation or try to paint him as a monster, but expect Crowe to become way busier than usual.

Will start randomly muttering compliments to you; sometimes you hear them, to which he denies…but deep down you know he sung your praises, and it fills you with warmth; because you know he isn’t the type to lie to his friends.

“Ugh, Brittney’s so pretty.”

“Not as much as you.”

“Excuse me?”

“You’re excused.” (you’re not).

Will send you a gift on your birthday, Valentine’s Day (he’ll make an exception to hating it if it means seeing you happy), Halloween, Christmas, he doesn’t care. Any occasion to give you something is a good one.

Will ask you out…eventually…maybe in a few decades (jkjk)

But when he does, his stoic face will crack, possibly for the first time ever, and he’ll smile. (You can’t handle it he’s too beautiful)

Will ensure you know how highly he thinks of you every single day, along with letting you be the only person to hold his hand.

Will treasure you. Will tell you secrets after a while, will remind you that you can say how you feel around him, and you better start believing it.

As long as you’re comfortable, safe and happy around him, he's content.

[kimbappykidding]

Imagine having an extremely flirty relationship with Joshua but neither of you knowing exactly what it is

You were a family friend of The8's studying in Korea. As you didn't know anyone The8 had helped you out a lot and his members had pretty much adopted you. They always invited you out to dinner and any social event to make you feel at home. You got to know his members well and very quickly something began to develop between you and Joshua. You were both foreigners adapting to the Korean lifestyle and were pretty honest about your attraction to one another. You'd flirt and check each out and now it was a running joke the members all openly teased you about and Joshua was pretty proud and unashamed of it. Today you were meeting The8 for dinner after class and he told you to come and wait at a place where they had a fansign. He said it'd be easier and better for you to wait backstage than outside in the cold. You showed up at the fansign and went backstage, the staff recognised you and let you through immediately. You were shown to a table just off-stage where you could do some work on your laptop. You could see the members on stage but were hidden from the fans...however one member spotted you immediately.

"Jealous?" a voice asked appearing beside you and you knew who it was instantly. You smirked "nope, why should I be?". Joshua shrugged "i just thought it might be hard seeing all these girls flirt with me". "If that's what's been happening? It looked more like fans appreciating you". Joshua smiled "yes but a lot of them find me attractive so they flirt with me". "Just imagine that" you said pretending to be shocked and Joshua rolled his eyes "I know you find me attractive too y/n" and he rushed back on stage. You shook your head at his words, used to this playful banter and carried on with the essay you were writing They were on the last part of the fansign now and the members all changed seats. Joshua ended up nearest to the stage exit where you were sat. He noticed this and kept smirking, trying to catch your eye whenever there was a break to distract you from your work. When you did look up he asked you for water but when you went to toss it he shook his head and rushed over to you. Then he saw you had a Starbucks and smiled "can I have some?". You smirked "no! It's mine". Joshua began to whine "aww come on I'll take you for one after this". "I'm going for food with The8 after this". "Ditch him for me" Joshua smiled and you smiled back "no but if you ask nicely you can have a sip of my drink". "Pretty please with sugar on top y/n?" he asked batting his eyelashes at you. You handed it to him and he smiled "you really are the kindest, smartest, prettiest, most humble..." he started when the staff called they needed him on stage. You took your drink back from him and he gasped. "What? You don't have time anymore so mine" and smiled. Joshua put his hand over his heart shaking his head at you before rushing back outside. After the fansign Joshua came over to you swaggering a little. "So The8 says I can come with you for dinner" Joshua said with a huge smirk on his face and you shook your head "you mean you forced him into letting you come?". Joshua shook his head "not at all! He loves me and so do you". You rolled your eyes but before you could speak Scoups called "Joshua stop flirting and come here!". That did make you blush to know all the members were waiting for him but Joshua just smiled "I'll be back" and with a wink he rushed away. Jeonghan and Wonwoo also tagged along to the meal and neither you nor The8 minded. You were having a nice time, sat next to Joshua of course which always seemed to happen whenever the two of you went anywhere with the group. You were pretty much lost in your own world, flirting a lot when Joshua went to the bathroom and Jeonghan had a burning question. "So when are you and Joshua going to actually get together?" he said "I'm just asking because frankly I'm sick of him going on about you and I'm hoping if you date him he'll settle down". You smirked "I'll consider it if you tell me what he says about me". Jeonghan nodded "okay well he really likes your hair and your eyes. He always says you look like some cool vampire or something and he nearly died when he saw you in leggings". The8 snorted and hit Jeonghan who just smiled "what? It's true". Joshua appeared "what’s true?". "That you nearly died seeing y/n in tight clothes" Wonwoo replied blankly. Joshua paused before nodding "that is true". You laughed at his honesty and he shrugged "I think it's no secret I think y/n's attractive. Is this news to you y/n?". "Well no " you nodded and Joshua nodded "see" and smiled. "Do you want me to continue?" Jeonghan asked and you shook your head "we can continue it in private but I'm afraid I have to leave now"."Awww what? But you can't go!" Joshua cried and you smirked "I've got work!". Joshua groaned "fine but I'll walk you" and he grabbed his jacket. "We're not paying for you" Jeonghan said and Joshua passed them his wallet before standing up beside you "let's go". "So what were you and Jeonghan discussing?" Joshua asked falling in step with you. You shrugged "you of course". Joshua smiled "you're making me blush! What about me?". "He was telling me all the things you say about me when I’m not around". Joshua smirked "oh yeah? What did he tell you". "He only told me you like my hair, eyes and think i'm a vampire". Joshua shook his head "wow he didn't even scratch the surface!". "Care to continue then?" you asked and Joshua nodded. "I talk about you a lot, mainly saying y/n looks so cute or y/n looks really pretty or y/n looks really good...you know all the important stuff. I also disappear to talk to you a lot and they said my famous last words on a night out are, be right back just going to say hi to y/n". You chuckled "you're a terrible friend". "Then date me and I can start being a better one" Joshua replied. You rolled your eyes "so it's my fault you're a bad friend?". He shrugged "all I'm saying is my attention is on you so much I can't focus on them. The only solution is a date ASAP". "Or you can get better at multi-tasking" you replied "I'm here, see you around Joshua" and you disappeared into your building leaving Joshua outside watching you go. The two of you had always had a playful relationship and so you never took Joshua seriously when he said you should date him or asked you out. You figured it was just another joke but it wasn't. Joshua was deadly serious but he wasn't sure how to convince you of that. He'd been trying for a while now to get you to realise that but it wasn't working. 

All night Joshua thought about how he could make you see he was serious and he thought of nothing else. Luckily he was due to meet you after work the next day. You were going to see a movie and he told you to come to their building and wait in their dressing room area. Sure enough when he'd finished recording he came to find you sitting there. His heart leapt when he saw you and after singing lyrics about being in love all day he decided enough was enough. You smiled when Joshua walked in and jumped up "hey, you ready to go?". Joshua nodded but didn't say anything. "The film doesn't start for an hour so I thought we could grab something to eat first" you said but still Joshua didn't reply. "Joshua?" you asked confused "are you okay". He bit his lip and turned to you "look can i ask you something?". You nodded "shoot". "What are we doing?" he asked and you paused "well what do you mean?". "We've been flirting for months and I've asked you out tons of times but you just brush it off. Do you like me or am I just annoying you and you're too polite to tell me to leave you alone? If you want me to stop I will I just want to know". You gaped "I...you never annoy me and I don't want you to stop". Joshua paused "you don't". You shook your head "no...I really don't. I was just never sure if you were serious or not" you admitted. Joshua smiled in relief his confidence coming back. "Great...so you want me too?" he asked moving closer so he was stood right in front of you. "I wouldn't say that" you said smirking up at him and Joshua grinned "then why are looking like me that?". "Like what" you asked your smirk faltering and he smiled. "All hungry and dark. Plus the way you said you didn't want me to stop was so instant and your voice deepened as did the look in your eyes...eugh I want you so much y/n" he groaned and you blinked up at him. You could see the truth in those words by how Joshua was staring at you and hearing him say that made you feel tingly. Joshua was clearly waiting for a signal for you and you finally gave it to him. "Then do something about it like you should've done this whole time". Joshua's eyebrow twitched but that was all the surprise he showed before kissing you. He pressed you up against the wall rapidly and you wrapped your arms around his neck. Joshua was more aggressive and rash than you expected but it just made it better. You were quickly lost in your own world of each other and it had been a long time coming. Joshua could feel himself starting to get more and more excited and he pulled away before things got too far. Joshua leaned back and looked at you "was that enough of something or would you like to come back to my place?". You blushed at what you'd gotten yourself into but nodded "I'm not totally convinced". Joshua grinned and took your hand "just wait till I'm done with you" and tugged you to the door. You made it back to the Seventeen dorm rapidly and Joshua led you to his room. On the way some members spotted you and Scoups grinned "finally hooking up?" he called joking but Joshua nodded. "Yeah so wear headphones, we're gonna be a while" and Scoup's jaw dropped "wait really?". Joshua shot him a look before wrapping an arm around you and taking you upstairs. Scoups turned to The8 who smiled "I have no words except it's about damn time". 

It was about time indeed.

[bells-of-black-sunday]

@witchcraftandburialdirt asked:

Sweat beads slid down his temple as the burning heat descended upon the driveway and campsite - one hardly even needed a fire to cook. The axe swiped through the air vigorously, its sharp edge forcing the log’s splinters apart with a booming “THUNK!”. Haruko accepted that this was his responsibility; he’d suggested camping and camping did they go. Much more than just the standard “somewhat in the woods but still enough to have a cell connection” style so many city dwellers were used to. No no. This was the real deal, middle of no where, thank Christ we found this River sort of thing. Frankly when Tarhos had approached him with the offer to be alone together for a week straight he practically jumped. And the past few days had been… well, good. 

A nice, easy normal that continuously dipped into their endless pool of affection for eachother. And that was showing itself now as he chopped the nights firewood - did Tarhos really think he didn’t see him staring? How could he not act like a boy band member in a teenager’s day dreams? Haruko didn’t even spare him a glance when he straightened and swept the back of his wrist across his forehead, bringing the motion into his hair to flick it outward. Without the pressures of outside life Haruko found it rather easy to joke and fool around, especially in this sort of way since Tarhos would be the only person to see it - and he didn’t have to think about anyone else. It was fun to see his eyes widen and jaw drop - and Haru didn’t expect his own stomach to flutter when he noticed the way his boyfriend was staring. 

False modesty was a guilty habit he lacked, and he remarked silently that if this were a movie some slow sensual rock song from the early 2000s would be playing. Maybe some saxophone, anything to really strike some of the hormones in the theatre - and now the hot lead would peel off his shirt to reveal his body. Haru followed the little script in his mind, rolling his neck and shoulders as he brought his black tank top upwards over his head and slid his long hair out of the fabric, fluffing it out with a quick double shake. Thoughtlessly he brought it across his forehead and tossed it to the side, the shirt landing over the edge of his lawn chair. His body tensed when he bent down to pluck up the axe, pulling it harshly from the face of the stump he had, finally letting it land upon his broad shoulder. Haru's thumb looped into his belt with a toothy smirk, ivory tiers flashing towards Tarhos cockily,

"See something you like, baby doll?"

Tarhos had been a teenage girl once. Not the prettiest, nor the kindest, but still a teen girl before he wound up at the foster home that raised him until they couldn't any longer and he joined the military based on that one simple lie that promised he'd been taken care of. He had once been the target for teen heart throb movies and boybands. The bodyguard couldn't help the way he stared, the way the scene painted out before him in the most cheesy way he could imagine.

The way his boyfriends tank top was pulled off way too slowly for someone just trying to escape the heat to the bounce of his curls when he fluffed out his hair. Who couldn't laugh at a sight like that, something genuine. Less forced than when they were around each other sometimes back in their apartment.

What really had happened over the past couple months? He wasn't even sure anymore, he just knew that for the first time in a while he'd been happy. Like genuinely happy. Not just the happy that Haru is home safe when he'd been out all day nor was it the happy he actually stayed home with him for once. Genuine happiness he hadn't felt in a while.

Tarhos half-heartedly rolls his eyes, "Not much else to look at dear, I got the tent put up and Bonnie's already napping." He walks over planting a kiss on his forehead taking the axe from him to set it down, "Besides you're so pretty in the sunlight you really can't blame me for watching, can you?" Maybe he was getting a bit too comfortable, not that it mattered really. No one was around to stare or gawk at him, just him and Haru.

[noxtivagus]

i am thinking about ffxiv. my head still aches but in a good way now

[leportraitducadavre]

Feminism without feminists

I wrote this as a companion piece to my “Female Empowerment” post. I thought about putting it as an addition to the original analysis I made but I fear it’ll be overlooked as most of my followers already read/interacted with the initial writing.

Now, fear not, as the title is nothing more than a blatant “Marketing Strategy” I’ve decided to use. Although there’s some truth in the statement, it intentionally encompasses the entire movement for shock value rather than realistically covering the real portion I’m referring to: this expression is more inclined towards “Woke and White Feminism”, which has become incredibly popular amongst fandoms in general.

There’s this… incredibly oversimplification inside the feminist fandom of most fictional works where the fans limit or encompass the entire feminist spectrum inside one character, the one, and everything outside that specific character is either misogynistic or, in lesser terms, less feminist than the one they chose to project themselves as females. I understand that underrepresentation inside fictional works (particularly action fictional works such as super-hero comics and Shönen mangas) sparked the search for female representation inside the narrative by latching onto the most potable feminist character out there, but as of now in modern times, this search misrepresents womanhood as a whole.

Here’s the thing, women need to be independent but not that independent as to reject the main male character we envisioned her with:

Beautiful but not conscious of that prettiness (the shyer, the better), kind but not allow everyone to stomp on her, bold but not THAT bold, smart but not as much as her male counterpart, desirable but not for everyone or she’ll be a Mary Sue, sexy but not a slut, and most importantly, strong. 

These contradictions between the two ends of the spectrum limited women’s representation inside stories (as they were “too complicated to write”), yet the response to this patriarchal erasure brought a new entire issue because, now, women are forced to be flawless in order to be likeable (so any characteristic that doesn’t match with our cultural idea of “likeable” gets either labeled as “misogynist” or completely ignored. Dr. House is incredibly rude and unrelatable, but it doesn’t matter because he’s a man, so he isn’t representing the entire male gender) and to be remarkable in usually more than one aspect (a single one isn’t enough, in Naruto’s manga, Sakura’s and Hinata’s fandom portrays each of them as the strongest, smartest, kindest, prettiest, fastest and so on -they need to give them all of these qualities because, otherwise they’ll be, by their standards, completely unremarkable, and women can’t be unremarkable, god forbid).

Many female heroes are mostly portrayed as physically strong, the obsession of Western media with depicting “feminist role models” as women with physical strength and calling it a day baffles me, as it hasn’t stopped yet.

Why is so important for a woman to be physically strong? Well Moriarty, because -of course, it means that not only men are strong; you see, women can be strong too! Although… not all women, rather, this one specifically because is the one this portion of the fandom chose to represent themselves inside the narrative and making all women equally powerful would strip the character they decided was the most feminist one of the uniqueness they want and in turn would make her… well, common.

She needs to be the strongest in this specific physical field because is the easier one to show, doesn’t need to construct an actual plot around it (so complexity for her character isn’t necessary), and she could “easily” take other characters down if needed (and in the context of a comic-book or shönen, that’s intrinsical). Neither Batman nor Iron Man are considered the strongest inside their respective universes, yet they’re the smartest, so they don’t need this physical skill to be considered a menace even against other characters that considerably surpass them (like Superman or Captain America). DC and Marvel also allow them to lose (and without giving them a romantical moment as a “reward”) because they don’t need to be the best in order to be compelling -something female characters aren’t allowed, as their capacities as fighters (strategically or physically) is their most intrinsical and important value; so if they lose or make a mistake they aren’t feminist enough: it erases everything they had going for them. 

[Again, Sakura is the strongest kunoichi for her fandom, no one is able to dispute that because even showing panels upon panels of elements/techniques and/or strategies that could at least put her in a difficult place they come up with techniques she wasn’t shown to have (Tsunade being able to survive being cut in half doesn’t mean Sakura’d be able too) or they enhance canonical techniques to unimaginable degrees: She has great chakra flux control, that doesn’t mean she will have unlimited amounts of chakra to perform any sort of jutsu, as she uses only medical ones (Strength of a Hundred Seal stores 3 years of chakra into her forehead, not an infinite amount of chakra). Creation Rebirth regenerates her as long as she has enough chakra -and it’s even established it won’t work if it's a serious wound. Being a medic-nin and being trained to stay away from battles or dodge attacks (unless she has the Creation Rebirth) doesn’t mean she’s faster than a regular ninja. She’s told to be the “brightest” so that instantly translates into her being able to see through any strategy -she was outsmarted by another female character, Ino, but let’s ignore that and say that she grew up so much she’ll defeat her in no time. Ino also grew (they’ll admit it as, you see, they are feminists Sakura stans), but not as much as Sakura because well… she’s a better medic so… bookish… academic… translates to strategist… yeah.

Hinata’s fandom isn’t much better, as they translate Neji’s accomplishments to Hinata’s character. She was canonically shown to fail when trying to kill a Jubi clone with the Eight Trigrams, 64 Palms technique -which is why she needs to combine it with the Twin Lion Fists that draw chakra from those it touches, but instead of settling for a character that shows a pretty average female character capacity wise, they enhance her to their personal tastes of what a woman should actually be; because otherwise, she’s unremarkable, and as feminist we should only have remarkable female characters to cheer for!]

Furthermore, male characters need to be in awe of this female character's prowess because while most of those males are usually other characters with the same type of power or are surrounded by other people with the same capacity (so you would think that picking up a car wouldn’t be that jaw-dropping for them), they aren’t used to see women doing such incredible things, so they deserve praise -no, more praise than any male because they biologically aren’t wired to even attempt those things. And sure, being praised for something "considered normal" inside the male gender is isolating a single female character as the sole contradiction of a well-established norm, but she’s singled out and highlighted by the narrative as the feminist role model, so who cares about all the background females that accomplished nothing in order not to dispute the main heroine’s status? Every other female is weak and needs protection but not THIS female character (Loki praises Sylvie for being different than any other Loki variant -she’s the only female so uniqueness reached!- despite having, you know, a crocodile Loki right in front of him. I personally would be more curious about the only non-mammal variant -but who am I to dispute the God of mischief?).

Peggy shoots Nazis. She never has to be rescued or protected by Captain America or anyone else. She has a decent amount of screentime (...) She’s introduced briefing a number of potential recruits to the super soldier programme. This is the scene clearly written to establish Peggy’s SFC cred, and it unfolds like this: One of the recruits immediately starts mouthing off at her, first insulting her accent and then, when she calls him out of the line-up, making sexist, suggestive remarks. 

She punches him to the ground.

Later she discovers Captain America being kissed by the only other woman with a speaking part in the film, who has no other role except to kiss Captain America. She outwardly maintains her composure until Captain America is handling his iconic shield for the first time, and its perhaps-impenetrable qualities are briefly discussed as well as the fact that it’s just a prototype. Peggy suddenly fires off several shots at Captain America, so that he must raise the shield (which does, thankfully, stop bullets) to avoid being killed.

Both scenes are framed as funny and impressive.

Source

Writers need to specifically show a very exaggerated form of sexism in order for women to react (violently) towards it. If not, they’ll make a male character (usually a background or non-important character) question a woman’s decision in order to illustrate the crudest and most open form of sexism because we haven’t had enough of those yet. Meanwhile, female characters’ abusive behavior is brushed aside (by the narrative and the fandom), because it’s “cute” and “funny” (women can’t be cruel if we want them to be likeable, but the fandom lets this behavior pass because, while strong, they aren’t as strong as to cause any actual physical damage and men don’t suffer from PTSD, right?) while their experience with abuse makes up for a compelling background for them:

Source

Many Naruto fans will jump to my neck and breathe through their teeth that “well, she’s the heroine, so of course she’d be the strongest and most important feminist representation inside the narrative” (and here they’ll turn and jump on each other’s throats as their chosen female lead isn’t the same and I’ll take advantage of the distraction to run), but let’s think of this a little more deeply: Is Sakura truly the heroine? Or does she happens to be the only female character with enough panel time? Technically, Naruto is the hero and Sasuke is his antagonist, so there’s no need for a “heroine” whose main activity is to merely be in close proximity to be considered “relevant enough”, she doesn’t move the plot forward (as that’s the antagonists’ job) nor is intrinsical for any other character’s development, so why is she “bound” to be the strongest as that’s not her objective nor role inside the story? Simply put: Sakura doesn’t need to be the strongest, furthermore, it doesn’t matter -as her character revolves around being capable enough to “keep up” with her teammates (and metaphorically, as she isn't as strong nor fast as them). She becomes one of the three best medic-nin of the world when she’s seventeen, yet that’s not enough because she needs to be better also in everything else (she, somehow, had the potential to do so, but by that premise, everyone had the potential to do anything if properly trained -that's the thing, why is she any different?). There’re men that surpass her power-wise but her fandom will create a fantasy where they don’t, or they’ll create a fantasy where those men won’t turn against her because they are in love with her, but she’ll always -always be prettier, stronger, smarter, faster than other female characters, because not only she’s the primary representation of feminism inside the story, she’s also their personal representation inside the narrative, and them -as the main character- need to be prettier, stronger, smarter and faster than their competition female counterparts.

Naruto is, by the end of the series, considered the physically strongest character, yet he isn’t inside the narrative nor for the fandom, the sharpest tool in the box. He’s not considered the smartest, he’s not even considered the person with the most ninjutsu repertoire out of all the male characters. He is allowed not to be the best in every scenario because he’s not considered the representation of his gender inside the story which, in turn, makes him more interesting as he's allowed to struggle.

Konan is, by far, the most feminist-relevant character inside the story -but she’s usually undermined because “she was just following Nagato and Yahiko around” but then I ask, what is she supposed to do then? She grew up alongside them and experienced the same things, why would she think or have ideals opposite or different from theirs? Didn’t Nagato just continue Yahiko’s fight? Didn’t Yahiko simply refuse to accept their current condition? Why are her ideals reduced to “following her male friends”, when she was an active participant inside Akatsuki?

Females, especially those who are chosen to be the “feminist standard”, aren’t allowed to be mean, dumb, weak, or ugly (because “feminists” are usually depicted by patriarchy as “unattractive” and “undesirable”, so they counterattack this depiction by creating this “beautiful and sexy character that everyone wants even if they are incredibly rude to them as that turns them on for inexplicable reasons” conception of the woman they’ve chosen to represent them) and they aren’t allowed to lose even against other women (and if they do, is simply a temporary setback that they are bound to overcome at some point) because they aren’t just women; no, they are the woman.

It is also quite striking how the main plot focuses on the problems brought about by a military system whose foundations are intrinsically patriarchal and how much of the “feminist fandom” focuses on the little to no inclusion of women within that system, rather than its dismantling, which was proposed to and tried to be carried out by other characters such as Konan (to mention a female character as bringing Sasuke to the picture might “compromise” the fandom’s idea of “feminism” that upholds itself under the notion that only women can be part of it).

The problem with this idea of “inclusivity” within an intrinsically repressive patriarchal system is that it is sustained on a smoke screen that hides the most rotten veins of the state, because then what is relevant is not the dismantling of an oppressive, enslaving and genocidal political system, but the lack of female participation within the oppressive, enslaving and genocidal political system. To this specific “woke feminist” fandom that is the real problem, that is the real issue within such a mindset.

Women are forbidden or diminished from positions of power in a structure specifically designed to oppress different groups of people to keep others at the top of the pyramid, and instead of seeing such a construction as a direct reflection of the real world’s dogmas and the characters that oppose them as real world’s feminist, you lot complain about the lack of female representation or “female power” within that maniacal structure! You’re more concerned about women not being “housewives” inside a military state that rewards blind nationalism and punishes criticism with literal genocide, than dismantling the entire structure upon which such a patriarchal notion is built.

Funnily enough, even when I point this out, they'll find a way to twist it to their benefit, because then Kishimoto is the one responsible for not “allowing” female characters to rise against such a patriarchal system (despite Sakura never suffering any of its worst consequences as she was taught by the Hokage herself, or even Hinata getting to be a slave-owner). Inclusivity is everything that this argument boils down to, their twisted wish to see women at every single panel whether it’ll be against or in favor of a genocidal state.

That’s what “woke feminists” taught them and that’s what they’ll defend with their breath, the problem gets again individualized and the real issue, the real problem that the plot is trying to reflect, gets buried upon piles of these arguments.

“The problem is about the military state that at its core it’s patriarchal” =/= “Then why did he write it as a patriarchal state?”

“The military state it’s patriarchal at its core so it’s the real world one” =/= “Then why didn’t he write female characters rising against it?”

“There’re characters that oppose such structure, which is feminism at its finest.” =/= “But they aren’t female.”

And so on… it's impossible to "win" or get our point across as they move the end goal every time a new argument arises. It's about fulfilling their power fantasies and invincibility rather than bringing down the patriarchal structure; just like with Naruto's character, is about gaining acknowledgment within the oppressive system (becoming a renowned/desired individual) rather than dismantling the power sphere to guarantee other minorities' safety.

Their idea of feminism comes down to women having a more important part inside that tyrannical paradigm, bringing the power scale towards them. It's not about stripping oppressive institutions of their power, but rather having influence over such spaces.

[ongaku-ato-kakikomi]

When You Casually Talk About Your Trauma To Stray Kids

(A/N): Platonic headcanons about Stray Kids.

Bang Chan:

♥ The conversation mood would drastically change from a normal one to a serious one in an instant

♥ He would literally be so worried about you no matter how casual you are about it

♥ Something bad happened and scarred you, how can he not worry?

♥ “Are you okay?”

♥ He looks into your eyes when he says this, and he will keep asking until he knows if you’re truly are okay or not; it doesn’t matter if you laugh it up or try to change the subject, he will make sure he gets the truth out of you.

♥ If you need him to, he will spend hours listening to you talking about it

♥ He really wants to make sure that you know you can confide in him at any time about anything

♥ Every day after this, he tries to show that he’s looking out for you and that he supports you

♥ He asks you how you’re doing a little more often, asks if he can help you with anything, and always reminds you that he’s there to help you out whenever you need to

♥ It hurts him to know that you went through this trauma, but he’s gonna do his best to help you be as happy as you can be in the future.

Lee Know (Minho):

♥ A bell rings inside his head as soon as he hears you mention your trauma, but there’s no way anyone could tell that he even picked it up.

♥ He’d continue to listen to you talk about whatever topic you want, giving out a few laughs from time to time to hide his worry and discomfort.

♥ He might look like he’s calm about this, but in his mind he’s going over every word you said, analyzing every sentence and the tone of your voice.

♥ He’s trying to understand what the extent of your trauma might be without asking you about it, particularly why you seem so casual about it.

♥ He obviously worries about you, but he doesn’t want to force you to talk about this kind of thing unless you want to.

♥ It takes him maybe another few minutes before he manages to relax and properly engage in your conversation, putting aside a mental note about this to think more about later.

♥ He’ll wait for you to want to talk about it; he won’t address it unless you come forward first.

♥ He will start to showcase a more protective side towards you though: standing half-beside you half-behind you while you’re talking with someone, handing you a few more bites than to others after he cooked a meal, and he will most definitely remind you to drink water if you didn’t.

♥ It’s small things that most people wouldn’t even notice if it came from anyone else, but it’s enough to make you feel supported in your everyday life.

♥ And if you ever do need to talk to him, he’s there.

Changbin:

♥ Sometimes you don’t realize that you’ve blurb out about your trauma, but you rapidly realize that you might have said something wrong as soon as you notice the way Changbin is looking at you.

♥ The fact that he looks like you just dropped a bomb on him, his eyes wide with what seems to be worry only makes you even confused.

♥ It’s when you ask him if there’s something wrong that he finally seems to come back to reality, as he would immediately ask you if what you said really happen.

♥ He’s just so shocked when you say that it’s true; he doesn’t really know how to react properly.

♥ You’re used to people being so shocked to this, so you immediately reassure him by saying that you’re fine now, and that he doesn’t need to worry about you.

♥ He does worry (obviously), but he doesn’t want you to feel overwhelmed by his questions, especially since he can sense that you don’t really want to talk about it.

♥ So he’d rapidly remind you that he’s there fore you before he’d turn the conversation around back to a fun one, spending the rest of the day trying to make you smile as much as possible.

♥ From now on, he often goes out of his way to come see you or talk to you; maybe you think it’s because he needs some attention, but it’s mostly so he can make sure that you’re okay.

♥ He’ll start complimenting you all the time, telling you that you’re the greatest person he knows, the prettiest, the kindest, etc.

♥ Whatever he can thinks about to brighten your day, he will tell you, and all that matters to him is to see you happy.

Hyunjin:

♥ You’d go from a light and fun conversation to a serious and very long one about your life in less than a few seconds.

♥ Hyunjin has this thing about him that makes you want to tell him everything, and he doesn’t need to say anything to know that he supports you and that he’s here for you.

♥ He’d make sure to not ask about anything that makes you uncomfortable; instead, he’ll listen to you and let you decide what you wanna share.

♥ He’s obviously worried about you and your mental health, and he wants to be there for you and help you through your trauma when you need to talk about it.

♥ If he sees that the conversation is dragging you down, he’ll go out of his way to change the subject and make you feel better.

♥ Especially if he sees that you’re about to cry, then it’s time for him to find a way to make you smile again.

♥ But if you do need to cry, he’ll hug you and tell you that everything is okay while you cry your heart out.

♥ His behavior around you after this doesn’t change much; he still treats you like a close friend and he understands that your trauma doesn’t define you.

♥ If anything, he’s one of the few people you’ve told that doesn’t look at you with a sense of pity, and that’s honestly refreshing to you.

♥ And you know that his door is always open for you, whether you want to talk or simply need a hug.

Han Jisung:

♥ He is so shocked as soon as he hears it; you’ve never seen someone with their eyes as wide as his before in your life.

♥ You don’t even have time to say that you’re okay, that he doesn’t need to worry, that words are already out of his mouth.

♥ “Are you okay?”, “I’m so sorry!”, “Why did they do this to you?”, etc.

♥ He asks so many questions in so little time, you don’t even have time to register all of them, nor do you get a chance to answer some of them as a new question pops out before you can open your mouth.

♥ You can hear the worry in his voice increasing with each question he asks, and he only ceases his talking when you put your hands on his shoulders and asks him to calm down.

♥ Once he closes his mouth, you take your time to tell him that you’re okay, and that he doesn’t need to worry so much about you.

♥ He doesn’t seem to quite believe you for a few seconds, seeing as how he seems to be chewing on his words for a while, before he simply asks you if you’re sure.

♥ When you say you are, he accepts your answer and lets you change the subject to something lighter, though he will continue to think about this for a pretty long time.

♥ You think it’s very sweet of him to worry so much though.

♥ And the sudden random hug attacks you get from him the next few days are definitely appreciated.

Felix:

♥ Felix is so calm and collected about the information you casually gave him that you end up talking about your trauma for a long time without even noticing.

♥ He just has this calm aura around him that makes you feel at ease, so it’s suddenly become much easier for you to talk about your emotional scars.

♥ He spends the entire time listening to you and giving you all of his attention, speaking up to ask a question only from time to time.

♥ He wants to make sure that he understands everything that you say without burdening you with all the worry he has for you.

♥ He realizes how strong you are the more you talk, and he can’t help but admire you for managing to survive all of that.

♥ He tells you this when you’re done speaking, catching you off-guard, and hearing from someone else how strong you are makes you cry right on the spot.

♥ He doesn’t say a word and hugs you as close as possible, letting you cry out for as long as you need while he uses his voice to soothe your emotions.

♥ The next few days you seem to be happier; your talk with Felix actually did you more good than you thought it would, and it shows.

♥ Though it might also be the back hugs Felix gives you when you seem to need them the most, even if you haven’t even showed that you needed them.

♥ He just knows when you need him, and you really appreciate it.

Seungmin:

♥ You’re not even halfway through your sentence that he spits out unexpected words: “They did what?”

♥ That’s when you notice that his expression is full of shock mixed with anger.

♥ He couldn’t believe that someone had done this kind of thing to you, and he hated that it actually happened.

♥ You try your best to explain that you’re okay with all of this now, but it doesn’t do much as he only seems to become more vocal about everything.

♥ You realize that maybe it’s best that you don’t go in details about your trauma, not now at least since he seems to get angrier at every bit of information you blurt out.

♥ You know that he’s not angry at you though; he’s angry at them, and even though you weren’t expecting this reaction from him, it makes you feel protected.

♥ You won’t be able to change the subject of the conversation right away though; he would need some time to process everything.

♥ When he has finally digested everything, he’d make sure to let you know that he’s there for you by staying by your side most of the time or giving you quick hugs when no one’s looking.

♥ It makes you smile when he holds your hand to ask you how you’re feeling today, and you think it’s really sweet of him to do so.

♥ All he wants is to make sure you don’t get hurt again, and honestly, he’s doing a great job at it.

Jeongin (I.N.):

♥ You haven’t noticed that you’ve been talking about your trauma until you hear him make a sad sound, which makes you notice the shock and sadness in his eyes.

♥ “Oh, don’t worry, I.N., I’m fine now.”

♥ No matter how much you try to reassure him, it doesn’t seem to make him any less sad.

♥ Probably because you keep accidentally tell another detail about your trauma, which makes him give out even more sad sounds in response.

♥ He ends up hugging you because he can’t help himself, letting you pat his arm as another way of reassuring him while you tell him that you’re okay a few times more.

♥ He eventually has to believe you and lets you change the conversation a few minutes later, but that won’t stop him from giving you a few more hugs for the rest of the day.

♥ The next few days, if the members start to tease you, even if he knows it’s for fun, he’ll probably let out a few of his savage lines as a way of showing that he’s got your back.

♥ You let him know that you appreciate it by teasingly rustling his hair around, which often makes him give out a groan of embarrassment while he replaces his hair.

♥ You think it’s sweet and adorable of him to look out for you this way, and you can’t help but to tease him as a thank you.

♥ And he lets you tease him because it’d rather see you be happy doing that than be sad about your past, even if he has to suffer for it.

♥ And honestly, it’s just all worth it.

[terrifictomholland]

Ive watched too much 13 going on 30 lately, that’s all I can blame this on!

“Let’s play seven minutes in heaven!”

Those were words you dreaded to hear. Not only did you dread those words, they terrified you. What if they could see through you with like, x-ray vision and be able to tell you’d never kissed anyone before?

Of course no one knew that, nor could they see that. But to you if felt as though you had a massive bullseye painted on your back. You hated it.

It made you feel singled out. Not only was this your first ever party you’d ever been to, now you were all playing seven minutes in heaven?

Your anxiety was through the roof.

You made eye contact with your best friend, Harrison, praying he could see your panic. He knew about your kissing history, or lack-thereof.

He noticed you freaking out and wormed his way close to you rubbing your arm comfortingly.

“It’ll be okay,” he assured and you so badly wanted to believe him.

“Everyone’s gonna know H, absolutely everyone.” You whimpered and he looked at you sympathetically.

“They won’t. Hey, you’re not the only one who’s never kissed anyone, I promise.” He whispered and your eyes shot up to look at him, then to everyone else in the circle trying to figure out who.

“Are you taking the piss out of me to make me feel better? Don’t insult me like that.” Your voice grew slightly and Harrison’s eyes widened and he shook his head quickly.

“No! I’d never do that to you!” He was quick to reassure and the sincerity in his blue orbs made you believe him.

“I’m sorry,” you whispered as hot shame rolled through you.

You could feel him press a kiss to your temple, accepting your apology wordlessly.

“Just, trust me on this yeah? Can you do that?” He asked in that hopeful voice that he knew you could never say no to.

“Yeah, okay,” you conceded.

“Yeah okay, excellent!” He rubbed his hands together smiling, you shook your head watching him.

You joined him there in the circle as people were paired off together, whooping and catcalls being made as soon as they left and would come back blushing furiously seven minutes later.

You felt yourself go crimson when Harrison’s name was called and along with the girl you knew he fancied, but Harrison? He was just smirking and he offered her his hand and off they went.

With him gone, you took the time to survey which ones were left beside yourself.

A few boys and girls, some looking more nervous than others but then your gaze fell on him.

Your breath caught in your throat seeing him. He was the prettiest boy you’d ever seen before. Dark wavy hair, slightly messy and the kindest, warmest brown eyes you’d ever seen before. He looked about as out of his depth as you felt which reassured and calmed you just a bit. Suddenly, you wanted it to be your turn, you wanted it to be your turn with him.

Which was silly to even entertain the idea because you’d never seen him until now, you didn’t even know his name for Christ sakes.

He must’ve felt you looking at him because he looked over at you making you quickly avert your gaze as your cheeks heated up.

The next time you dared a glance at him he was the one to quickly look away making you flush and hide a massive cheesy smile. Oh, you really wanted to spend those seven minutes with him now. You didn’t care of desperate it would make you seem.

“Hey,” Haz grinned, his lips swollen beyond belief and cheeks flushed and eyes shining. You narrowed your eyes seeing the beginning of a hickey on his neck.

“Have a good time?” You asked and he grinned throwing a wink your way.

“I did thank you,” he said smugly and you felt your stomach twist and turn seeing how happy and relaxed he looked. You wanted the same and it dawned on you that what you were feeling was jealousy.

“I volunteer Y/N and Tom!” You whipped your head toward Harrison, seeing the cute boy do the same with wife and horrified eyes.

“What?” You squawked slapping your best friend in the arm. He just looked at you far too knowingly making you nearly swallow your tongue.

“What the fuck Haz?” The cute boy, Tom, asked Harrison.

“You’ll thank me,” he smirked at the both of you. Everyone had heard Harrison call Tom and you out so you had no choice but to get up and walk over to the closet with Tom, following behind him.

You closed the door with a gentle click and you felt your nerves come back in full swing knowing that you were truly alone with the cutest boy you’d ever seen.

“I uh, my names Tom.” He introduced holding his hand out and you took it, the moment your hands touched you swore you could feel a spark fly. Your eyes drifted up to his seeing his eyes widen so you knew he felt it too.

“I’m uh- I’m Y/N,” you said shyly retracting your hand.

“Y/n,” you heard him test out and your belly filled with warmth hearing him say your name.

“I uhm..I-I’ve never done this before. We don’t have to do this y’know? I don’t want you to feel you have too just because of a silly game?” Tom was rambling, scratching the back of his neck and turning beet red. You were sure he thought he was embarrassing himself, but you?

You were impossibly endeared and he was making you feel all that more relaxed knowing he was just as nervous as you and that this was going to be his first kiss too.

“Tom,” you started and he immediately looked up at you, “I..ive never done this either. B-but maybe, we, uh, could do this together?” You trailed off feeling far too exposed and nervous for what his response would be.

The smile that lit up on his face was enough to have your heart skip a few beats and you felt yourself flushing all the way to your toes. He had a magnificent smile.

“I’d love too!” He said enthusiastically and he flushed before realising how eager he truly sounded like, “if you want?” He tacked on at the end watching you nervously.

“Me too:” you admitted with a shy smile, slowly walking over to him. He was holding his breath as you walked closer and only exhaled when the tips of your toes touched his bare feet.

You’d never been this close to a boy beside, apart from Harrison but you didn’t really find him cute.

You were so sure that Tom could hear the way our heart was jackhammering against your ribcage, tummy filled to the brim with nervous butterflies and your palms clammy and sweaty.

“A-are you okay?” He asked once he placed his hands on your waist, eyes searching yours and you bit your lip giving him a gentle smile, nodding encouragingly.

“Where do I put my hands?” You whispered feeling silly to even ask but he didn’t seem to mind. Instead, he took your hands and placed them over his shoulders.

“Does that feel okay?” You whispered looking up at him. You licked your lips wetting them as Tom gently stroked your cheeks and your eyes closed.

“More than,” you breathed and he let out a breath he was holding. His shoulders dropping in relief and you let out a tiny nervous giggle.

“Can I, uhm, can I?” He stumbled over his words and you just nodded, no words were needed.

It didn’t take long for you to feel soft and supple lips on yours. On instinct, your eyes closed and your grip on his shoulders tightened just trying to figure out what to do.

It was the best experience you’d had, but also a rather strange one. Kissing wasn’t what you’d conjured you in your mind, but you knew with practise it would be.

He pulled away too quickly for your liking watching you with hawk-eyes for your reaction.

“H-how was that?”

“I’d love to practise some more,” you giggled shyly and he did the same feeling as though a weight on his shoulders had lifted now.

“I think we can make that happen.”

Tagging - @blissfulparker @farfromhaz @farfromparker @mcuspidey @clara-licht @howdyho-holland @screamholland @parkeraul @peterparkoure @xoluvx @angelic-holland @naturallytom @thirsttrapholland @eeyore101247 @heyhihellowhatsup0

[hwangdol]

n.jm: where were you?

summary: y/n does not know what the fuck is going on half of the time. 

pairing: highschool!fboi!jaemin x fem!reader

warning: a lot of cursing, drug usage reference, crackheadness, maybe a lot of grammer error. this is my first bullet-scenario au so yeah. also! this a collab with the lovely @huangsren in out nct dreamies alternate universe teehee. she has a lovely, fluffy renjun one up so go read it!

part two!

you okay let’s get this collab with @huangsren 

so at NCT High if you don't know Na Jaemin who the hell are you? like everyone knows this kid from lunch ladies to the freaking janitors 

its not a surprise since the dude is literally dead drop gorgeous and has a shit ton of social skills. like the boy deadass can swindle his way out of detention (which he did) with just a wink 

typical fboi but instead of it being a huge turn-off, girls still throw themselves on him even when he WARNS them beforehand that he isn't looking for a serious thing

still, they get attached and heartbroken when he tells them “this isn’t working out” 

his friends (aka art-hoe!renjun and student-athlete!jeno) always rolls their eyes when jaemin rolls up into the lunchroom with his arms wrapped around a new girl’s shoulder

“bet she’s not going to last two weeks”- renjun slapping down a 10$ 

“knowing him, this isn’t going to last more than a week”- jeno said but still sliding over a 10$ bill 

AND SUPRISE it doesn’t 

both renjun and jeno don’t approve of his philandering, but they stick w jaemin cause he’s still their best bud cause bros before hoes ya know what i mean?

this is especially true with jeno cause they’ve been bffl since they were like five but that doesn’t mean that jaemin is anything like jeno. 

nah man they both are the complete opposite of each other

like jeno is a quiet reserved student-athlete boi but jaemin out here acting like a little thotty 

nomin is like a package deal, no one can separate them

here where out little y/n comes in

surprisingly you’re childhood friends w nomin 

both u and jeno are neighbors and your families have been friends since before you were even conceived 

your moms’ have weekly tea times where they’d gossip about everything and anything while your dads would be watching the weekly soccer/football games drinking a cold one 

you and jeno would be playing with some legos or barbies 

jeno had a minor (major) barbie obsession which was probably induced by you

don’t tell anyone but jeno still binge-watches barbie movies;;;his favorite really be the princess charm school one 

like i said nomin is a package deal so expect jaemin to be taging along to yours and jeno’s weekly playdate

imagine you being the princess while jaemin pretended to be the prince and jeno was the dragon,,,yeah man it was so lit 

this isn’t a jeno fic btw keep in mind its still jaemin 

all of that stuff before was when the three of you were like kids

once highschool came around all three of you found ur niches: jeno was the student-athlete, jaemin was well that guy that was wanted by all the girls

and you were just a regular mundane student ya know,,,you weren’t extremely talented nor smart you just floated around 

u still hung around jeno tho but your friendship was really lowkey 

like both of y'all would wait until the other one was completely alone or do some ridiculous actions to deliver the simplest messages 

jeno would look both ways before slipping you a note in class that said “can your mom drive me home today?” and you would make sure no one was looking before nodding secretly 

or the two of you would hide behind bushes to say that y'all parents wanted to have dinner together tonight 

tbh yall could just text each other but where’s the fUN in that? 

jaemin, on the other hand, was someone you haven’t a solid conversation with since sophomore year bc of an incident 

basically, you had helped one of your friends into a relationship with jaemin that lasted for about two months,,, which was considerably a long time considering that it was jaemin.the two of them were a fat power couple 

ur friend, let’s call her ella, was probably one of the more popular girls at school. she was well-known for being the prettiest, kindest girl that everyone LOVES

anyways, things didn’t end so well bc he stood her up at hoco even though he was gonna be crowned homecoming king and her queen. 

no one knows why jaemin just ditched but he did. 

didn’t stick well with your friend tho cause she stopped talking to you as well not really giving you an explanation

and this led to everyone in your friend group to kinda put all the blame onto you 

this is also when jaemin picked up his heartbreaker reputation and began living up to that title

at first ur were hella mad and sad, but you got over it cause being outcasted and kicked out of that friend group led you to befriend the local stoner boi!haechan

honestly, you got over it but after ignoring and avoiding jaemin for a whole year it just stuck. 

yall never talked again 

here comes SENIOR YEARS BITS 

u were so done w school at this point, you had suffered and labored through junior year,,, SAT and ACT were the biggest bitches you ever faced in your lifetime and this is coming from someone who was friends with the resident shithead lee haechan 

so it’s lunchtime and you’re listening to haechan’s wild story about some shenanigan that he and his weed dealer/ older college friend mark had gotten up to the past weekend 

“so like we were just hitting a blunt this weekend in mark’s car and this cop pulls up next to us.mark rolls down the window and all of the smoke just hits the cops in the face” 

“you're a fucking idiot, haechan” 

“listen bitch, i’m not done” 

“so the cop is doing the regular illegal drugs bullshit and asked mark a question. understand at this point that mark is high as fuck so i kid you not the crackhead says quack. nothing else just quack. honestly, i still don’t know how we got out of that but we did and lee haechan is still in school.” 

you want to slap your friend with a big smh at this point 

but it so ridiculous and so haechan that you can’t say anything else 

and you don’t have too! bc someone taps ur shoulder pulling you out of your convo and boom it’s ella 

“hey, y/n” she starts out sweetly and you could feel haechan’s bitch face directed towards the girl, who seemed to just ignore the boy 

“what’s up, ella?” you were hella fucking slightly irritated and highkey suspicious bc like this was the first time that she talked to you in like two years

“this out of the blue, but you know how prom is coming up soon? we need extra hands on the planning community,” ella explained with a bright smile  “we need another person to work on making the centerpieces for each table, but we only have one person on that” 

“okay, so what does this have to do with her?” haechan’s bitchy tone soaked in each word 

ella’s smile faltered slightly at his words, but it was so subtle that only people with keen eyes could notice

“i hope that i’m not imposing anything on to you.” ella trying to reassure  “but Mr. Moon told me that you still need some community service hours for our graduation requirement so I just assumed that this would be a good opportunity for you.” 

oh shit 

you completely forgot about that and you still needed like another 10 hours to complete

“ummmm” 

“i wouldn’t ask you this but my workload is completely swamped” ella added “it would be a big help if you can help. haechan, you can help too!” 

haechan let out a loud gag that seemed to baffle her 

“oh hell no, i already got my community service hours done like freshmen year.” 

you gave haechan the most incredulous face you could make cause like this druggie who gets high every other week and vapes in the bathroom really finished his community service hours before you????how?? 

“don’t look at me like that.” haechan kicked you underneath the table “it was before i learned how to roll a blunt” 

“drugs aren’t good for you, haechan,” ella chided 

haechan made a mocking face,,you know the one he does like that one,,”not all of us can be little miss goodie-two-shoes like you” 

oKAy time to do some damage control before your shithead friend gets himself into more shit 

“i’ll do it. just text me the details.” 

“thank you so much y/n!” ella said before bouncing off 

“i hate her” haechan stated

“you hate everyone” 

CUE aFTerschool when you follow ella’s text to go to the art building where everyone was gathered 

the minute you walked in you realized that you should have just said no and done some other community service activity cause jaemin was present standing in the corner and other people who you once called your close friends that turned out to be fat snakes

now you gotta deal with them again (aww shit here we go again) 

ella is motioning you to come into the classroom which you obliged cause you figured that you possibly could survive w ur rbf on as you made your way to the other unoccupied corner

there was some whispering in the background but you ignored it cUASE like hyuk always says: “you just gotta get high and block out all the haters” 

well, he was right about the second half, not so much the first. 

“alright everyone! thank you so much for volunteering to help set up for our senior prom! we only have about three weeks so we have to get all of the decorations done as soon as possible!” ella said in a chirpy tone

a lot of people looked motived by the girl’s bubby short speech on how everyone needs to put in 100% of their effort. you zoned that out as you caught the sleeping figure at the teacher's desk 

“goddamn you mr.moon forcing me to be here” you grumbled in your head almost missing your assigned duty, 

“y/n!” your head snapped in the direction that your name was called 

you saw ella standing with jaemin and the sirens go off in your head 

FUCK THIS

you let out a loud sigh before trotting over to the two 

ella gave you a piece of paper that had the centerpieces’ picture on them along with a long list of decorations “all you guys have to do is make about 300. all the directions are on the sheet and the supplies are in the other room. it’s really simple, just have it done by next friday.” 

you nearly popped a blood vessel 

300 by next friday? today was wednesday so that meant you only had ten days to finish all 300 of them

so you and jaemin are walking to the classroom next door to get the supplies y’all needed,,, in your head, you were just cursing everything in existence for putting you into this position especially mr. moon 

“so how did she rope you into this?” you heard jaemin say from beside you as you both carried boxes out to the parking lot. 

you two came to the good conclusion to split the load so that he would do half and you would do half 

150 it’s not that bad 

15 a day

hell yeah

it was so strange and foreign talking to him since it’s been about two whole years.  

he had a nice voice tho ngl maybe that’s why he got out of that detention that one time 

“she somehow found out that i still needed to complete my community service hours before graduation” you murmured, praying that haechan remembered you telling him to wait for you after school 

he probably ditched you to get high or hang out with one girl he liked

all jaemin said was “oh” and the rest of the walk to the school’s parking lot was quiet 

the tension was so thick you could cut it with a knife and the knife would break

“hey can i ask you a question?” jaemin asked when the two of you were about to go your separate ways 

you could see mark’s old beat-down car meaning that haechan, in fact, did ditch you but had the decency to call up mark to pick you up 

“yeah, go ahead” 

“how come you still talk to jeno, but not me?” 

i shit you not this was the quietest and deepest voice that you ever heard jaemin project 

you didn’t know how to reply so you looked down at the large box in your hand, mumbling some incoherent excuse

“can you repeat that?” 

“ i said, we don’t really have any other reasons to be friend's unlike me and jeno” 

“is that all?” jaemin asked, probably catching onto your bullshit

you were probably delusional but you could’ve sworn you heard some sadness in the tone he used

you nodded quickly trying to get to mark’s car hoping to avoid further conversation 

but boy was jaemin stubborn 

“that wasn’t a good explanation,y/n! ” jaemin called out after you. 

this time he sounded more lighthearted than before

you turn around to face jaemin who had a fatass smile on his face 

damn was he good looking smiling like that 

“give me a better reason tomorrow or else i’m taking you on a date!” his dazzling smile nearly blinding you as he made his way to his own car

inside your head little y/n is going whattheactualfuck? 

“what’s with that shook face?” mark ask as you climbed into the passenger seat 

“what the fuck?” you say 

“huh?”

you look at mark “what the ACTUAL fuck?” 

poor mark is like wtf is wrong with her,,,did haechan get her on some type of crack? 

that night while you were making the little centerpieces you were still going over what jaemin said 

you looked at the last centerpiece you finish making 

was he flirting with me? or was he serious?

he sounded sad when i said that tho? 

at the same, this was jaemin, a boy who is well-known for having flings left and right. 

he’s probably just flirting

until next day! jaemin pops up next to you as while you get your shit from your locker for your first class 

“did you come up with a good explanation yet? 

his sudden appearance startled you causing you to subconsciously let out a yelp 

“cute” he said, and you forced down the blush that was about to show 

“i thought i told you already?” causing jaemin to shake his head like a cute little puppy 

“i don’t accept it.i want a better one,” he said sounding like a spoiled toddler 

you gave him the “wtf do you mean look” and he was about to reply until you saw haechan walking through the school doors with a pair of sunglasses on which can only mean one thing

that little shit head came to school high again

you pushed passed jaemin and stormed towards haechan pulling him to some vacant hallway to lecture him

leaving jaemin standing there staring at your backs as the two of you left 

jaemin’s smile dropping significantly as he nearly glared over at the two of you leaving, specifically at the back of haechan’s head 

“dude, why do you look like you’re going to murder someone?” jeno asked as jaemin sat next to him at their lab station 

you weren’t in this chemistry class but haechan was,,,and it was his naptime

“how is y/n friends with him?” jaemin stared directly at a sleeping haechan 

jeno follows his line of sight, letting out a sigh once he notices it was haehcan

“she never really told me, but i assume it was because she stopped being friends with ella and that group” jeno said honestly. he raised an eyebrow in question at his bffl “why do you need to know” 

jaemin didn’t answer him, continuing to glaring at the sleeping male 

jeno rolled his eyes at his friend's antics 

but in a serious tone, he warns to his friend, “don’t pull your games with y/n.” 

except jaemin’s head wasn’t registering this warning,,he was solely focused on how lee fucking haechan the biggest stoner of NCT High managed to take a girl’s attention from him, na jaemin....it was simply ridiculous 

maybe he really was an attention seeker bc he made a beeline for your table during lunch instead of his regular one once he saw just how loud you were laughing at haechan’s joke 

“what’s so funny?” jaemin asked sliding into the seat next to you 

now both of you and our boy hyuk is like wtf 

immediately you’re on defense, “what are you doing here?” 

“you never gave me a good explanation!” jaemin pouted, giving you fat puppy eyes 

those aLMost worked 

“uhhhhhh” you try to find a good excuse but jaemin quickly cuts you off 

“it’s okay if you don’t have a good explanation,” jaemin reaches over and steals a fry from haechan’s tray eliciting a hissing sound from the boy “you just have to go on a date with me” 

then he winks 

and he's gone

“what in the holy fuck just happened?” 

the amount of time that y/n has said wtf is unbelievable 

haechan’s sunglasses slip down the bridge of nose and you could see his red eyes giving you a look of disappointment, “and you say i have issues” 

“stfu before i slit your throat” 

the rest of the day wasn’t any easier on you tbh. you learned that jaemin was really really stubborn and very very clingy 

the boy deadass scanned the whole hallway to find your face so he could tag along with you to your next class even though you could have sworn that his class was one the other side of the school 

he kept on bombarding you with questions on what you wanted to get after school and if you like roller skating 

by some means, you were able to hide in the library for the rest of the study hall period which meant that you could probably avoid jaemin until school ended 

you spotted a familiar boy huddled in the corner reading a book that made you squint your eyes. 

marching over to jeno, your eyes just say “explain” 

jeno looked at you with like those wide eyes he does when he’s shookth bc the two of you never interacting in school so puBlicly

“what the hell is na jaemin trying to pull?” you whispered-yelled plopping down in the wooden seat next to the athlete 

jeno is all like????wydm 

and you explain your whole situation to him and he just lets out the biggest sigh 

“he doesn’t like being left on read” 

“what do you mean?” 

“i mean, that’s what you basically did to him sophomore year. he was kinda depresso about how you just stopped talking to him out of nowhere. by the way, why did you do that?” 

tbh you really didn’t know at first you were mad at him

was it bc his actions caused all your friends to blame you for his inability to commit to a relationship,,, but it’s been two years since that incident

you got over it, so why were you still avoiding jaemin? 

“i dunno after him and ella broke up, i didn’t have a reason to talk to him.” 

jeno looked at you like “really? is that your answer?” 

“think about that question again because i’m sure that that's, not the whole answer.” 

now you’re more confused but also very mad about how both of them weren’t accepting your reason as valid! 

so as you were furiously making the stupid centerpieces that ella forced you into volunteering to do

angry y/n really got through a solid 50 of them 

you pondered on jeno’s words and you thought back to sophomore year 

you remembered still joking around lightheartedly w jaemin until he started dating ella 

he actually spent a lot of time and effort even ditching jeno sometimes for her which was okay cause jeno would chill w renjun or even you (mostly bc he could watch barbie movies w no shame) 

everything was alright until homecoming came around and jaemin flaked on ella leading them to breakup the next day 

and ella to stop talking to you which made everyone mad you or think that you were the one that caused the breakup 

WHICH YOU DIDN”T 

you were the one that hooked the two of them up too! so it was really unfair! 

it's like 2 am and you don’t know what came over to text jeno but you did 

y/n: why didn’t jaemin go to hoco sophomore year? 

you felt instant regret after sending that text bc like it probably made it seem like you were interested in jaemin,,,, which you were totally not!

seconds later jeno slaps you with the ”ask him yourself”  

fattest facepalm 

so that’s how you spent the entire night finishing all of your centerpieces that you were assigned to make cuz of your frustration

wow we love a productive y/n 

alrighty this is where shit goes down 

now that you were done with all of your centerpieces you took them to the art room the next day before school where ella was there doing her stoof 

she looked up with a giant smile when you came in with a giant box 

“you finished all of it?” 

“nah just 150. jaemins finishing the other half” you set the box down 

“oh okie,” ella nodded returning to whatever she was doing beforehand 

since it was just the two of you in the classroom and you’ve been dying to know the answer since sophomore year 

so fuck it 

“hey ella, can i ask you a question?” 

the said girl looked up with that same friendly smile that she gave everyone “of course!” 

“why didn’t jaemin show up to hoco sophomore year?” you blurted out 

in an instant, ella’s smile dropped and there was a sudden cold look in her eyes 

“you already know the answer to that, y/n, you don’t need me to answer you. now if you excuse me, i have things i have to do” ella said in a very unlike-ella-way 

her answer made you even more confused than ever bc how were you supposed to know the answer to THAT 

confused!y/n is even more confused 

however, all your questions were about to be answered, not really tho 

you’re on your way to the third period with the same burning question in your head: why the hell did jaemin not show up to sophomore year hoco??? someone help?  

tbh you didn’t even notice someone yanking you into the janitor’s closet until you were surrounded in darkness and someone's hands were clasp over your mouth 

“it’s me, jaemin” his soft whisper sent tings down your spine 

he let go of your mouth to switch on the light 

“are you fucking insane?” 

“yes, but it’s only cause i’m madly in love with you” 

you rolled your eyes “cut the bullshit, jaemin, what do you want?” 

“our date. you never gave me a solid explanation, so i want a date” 

you were about to reject him but then an idea formed in your head 

“fine” 

and with that one-word jaemin’s eyes glowed 10x brighter with his smile almost blinding you 

cheesy i know. 

“let’s go now!” 

the boy was really about to skip class just to go on this stupid date w you 

is he that bored? did he really run out of girls to date? 

but then again you really don’t want to go to math bc you’re pretty sure there's a test today that you haven’t studied for yet 

so that’s how you found yourself with jaemin at the local ice cream parlor 

jaemin INSISTED that y'all share a sundae, which he also fought you to pay for 

there a silence that falls upon you for a little bit 

jaemin breaks it though like he breaks heart (okay minnie that’s kinda mean) 

“ella told me that you finished your half of the centerpieces in two days. that’s pretty impressive,” he comments 

you nodded staring at the ice cream drowned in chocolate syrup 

“to be honest, i haven’t gotten much done yet,” he admitted, continuing to ramble on “it’ll get done. i might even pay renjun to do it, but i’m pretty sure he’s too preoccupied with this girl that he’s been pining over for a while” 

“speaking of which, are you seeing anyone right now?” jaemin asks out of nowhere. 

“lol i could be doing other things with my time.” 

jaemin observes your face closely taking in the faint blush on your cheeks from his direct gaze, “so what about that haechan dude?” 

“what about him?” 

“are the two of you a thing?” 

you nearly gagged 

“there no way in hell i’d ever get with haechan. besides, he’s having some of his own girl problems right now. he was being a little bitch about it too” 

“good” jaemin says really contently. 

“why didn’t you go to hoco sophomore year?” you finally asked

taken back slightly, jaemin softly smiles down at the half-eaten sundae

instead of answering you, he asked another question “why did you stop talking to me?” 

you gulp, but eventually, you had to tell him the truth even though it was kinda dumb and immature

“because ella was mad at me after the two of you broke up.” 

he shifted his gaze up to your own eyes 

“do you know why she was mad at you?” 

you shook your head

jaemin smiled again 

this time it kinda looked sad :( 

“because she knew that i was in love with you”  

[harrypotterpovs]

Sooo...here's my Fred Yuleball fanfic aka the first fanfic I'm publishing. Please remember I'm not a native english speaker so neither my grammar nor my translations are perfect. I hope you can still enjoy.

Backstory: You're a Gryffindor in the same year as the golden trio and share a dorm with Hermione and Lavender Brown. You're pretty popular and got asked out by a lot of guys who wanted to take you to the ball, but you only said yes to one of them: Fred. In this ff Fred shares a dorm with George and Oliver Wood (I know he's not in their year but I like himmm sm). You're somewhat close friends with the golden trio but spend most of your time with the twins. You already know about your feelings for Fred deep down but never made it too obvious.

,,Are you ready?“ Hermiones voice rings through the door just as she walks in. I look at her in awe. She wears the prettiest dress I've ever seen and has put her hair up into a beautiful knot. ,,You look stunning,“ I gasp. She laughs: ,,So do you. Who are you taking to the ball again? Fred or George?“ I smile widely just thinking about him. ,,Fred. I hope he likes the dress....“ Hermione puts her hand on my shoulder: ,,Don't worry, you look beautiful.“ I smile at her and hook arms with her. Together we walk down into the common room. The boys had to wait in front of the great hall until their dates arrived. So we make our way down the moving stairs. My heart pounds against my ribcage heavily. I felt so anxious. Fred was the kindest guy I knew but how would he react if the dress wasn't quite his taste? 

Hermione lets go of my arm and smiles: ,,You should hurry, they're over there.“ I look around and spot them waiting next the statue in front of the great hall. I nod, my knees shaking and get down the stairs. I see George spotting me first and his eyes widen. He elbows Fred who then turns around and looks me up and down. His facial expression was a mixture of surprise and pride. I smile at him happily as I walk towards him. ,,Ready?“ I ask. Suddenly George steps up: ,,Sure.“ Fred frowns at him and pushes him away: ,,You know she can tell us apart, idiot.“ George laughs and so do I. Fred looks at me: ,,You look stunning.“ I laugh and look at his suit. It was pretty worn down but he tried to spice it up with some golden buttons and a nice tie. ,,You're the one to say that...Look at you. Handsome as ever.“ He looks down his suit and smiles uncertainly. ,,Well, I tried my best.“ He holds out his arm and I take it. ,,Have fun, you two,“ George says happily and walks towards a girl that seems to be his date for tonight. 

Fred and I walk towards the great hall. ,,Try to not get into trouble tonight, alright?“ I say and look straight into Freds hazel eyes. He giggles: ,,I'll try my best, I promise.“ Seeing him smiling so genuinely was the most heartwarming thing I've ever experienced. The dancefloor was already crowded. ,,Shall we eat first?“ I ask. ,,You can read minds, I always knew,“ Fred says in a serious tone. Then he laughs and we push ourselves through the people towards the buffet. ,,You had the whole school to choose from and you take Weaslebee?“ I hear Pansy Parkinson snarl. I turn around and look at her. Her dress was pretty, not gonna lie. She and Zabini stare us down. ,,Obviously. Jealous that you didn't make the cut, huh?“ Pansy snorts angrily: ,,Why would I take something like this to the ball? He can't even afford a decent suit, look at this lump he's wearing.“ I see Fred checking his suit again. ,,Girl, have you checked the mirror before you left your room? You look like a whole gremlin.“ I take Freds arm and we distance ourselves from Pansy and Zabini. ,,I'm sorry, I really wanted to get a new suit but-“ ,,No, stop it.“ I interrupt him. He looks at me sadly. I grab his hands: ,,I love the suit and I love the tie. You look great, no matter what. Trust me.“ He looks at me for a while and then nods. ,,Let's dance first, then,“ I say and point to a less crowded corner. Fred smiles and takes my hand, leading me to the dancefloor. 

It was a slow song, very relaxing and classic. Fred puts his hand around my waist and holds my right hand with the other. He takes the lead and swirls me around. He's definitely better at dancing than I am. ,,Did you really have a lot of guys asking you out?“ Fred asks, trying to sound unbothered. I wasn't sure if I should tell him the truth. But lying to him was no option. ,,Yes. Even Malfoy asked me...as if...“ I shudder and Fred laughs: ,,And you still said yes to me?“ I nod: ,,Of course. I like you. A lot. Why wouldn't I go with you?“ Fred smiles happily and his cheeks turn rosé. He pulls me a bit closer, I almost touch his chest. I smell his cologne and a sweet fragrance, vanilla mixed with toffee and a hint of something that smells like gunpowder. I'm pretty sure I was never this close to him. I'd have noticed how good he smells. His hands are warm and soft and his movements pretty smooth. I've never felt so warm and secure before. ,,Is that glitter in your hair?“ he asks suddenly. I laugh: ,,A bit. Hermione said it'd look nice. You don't like it, do you?“ Fred shakes his head: ,,No. I mean yes. I do. Absolutely. It's just...The sheer effort you put into that...“ I laugh: ,,Well, to be honest...I was afraid you wouldn't like my dress or my hairstyle at first.“ Fred frowns: ,,How could I not?“ 

The song ends and I look at the buffet. ,,I think they're gone. Let's get some food,“ I say and pull Fred through the crowd. ,,Fred, looking good tonight...“ Ron says, as he passes by with Lavender Brown. He stops to look at me and then back to Fred. ,,I don't know what you did to get her to say yes, but man...Good job,“ he adds, looking me up and down. Lavender eyes me a with a hint of jealousy in her eyes. ,,What are you talking about, look at your date,“ I say. ,,Lavender, you look astonishing tonight,“ I add and look at her happily. Her whole face changes. ,,Really? Thank you,“ she says. Ron sighs and pulls her away. I wave at them, as they disappear into the crowd. ,,What is your favorite food?“ Fred asks suddenly. I frown. ,,We're working on a new trickster candy and we're still looking for good flavours,“ he adds as he takes two glasses of firewhiskey from a tablet. He hands me one of the glasses. ,,Like sweet stuff or...?“ I ask. Fred nods: ,,Preferably sweet yeah.“ I take a sip and shudder: ,,Ugh, definitely not this.“ I cough and Fred takes it away from me. ,,Sorry,“ he says and puts it away. ,,Try this...“ he says and reaches for a glass with a golden liquid. I take it. ,,I think marshmellows are always a good choice. Or nougat. I personally love pancakes too,“ I say, before I take another sip. This one was smooth. Still burning in my throat but in a less aggressive way. ,,Bit better?“ Fred asks. I nod: ,,Way better.“ Fred reaches for a plate and so do I. As we're done filling our plates we go to sit down. I see Hermione swirl by with Krum, not taking her eyes of him for even a second. She was beautiful. My eyes wander towards Fred who seems to have stared at me for a while now. ,,You good?“ I laugh. He nods: ,,Sure. Just appreciating your efforts.“ I smile and turn towards him. ,,Are you staying at Hogwarts this christmas again?“ he asks thoughtfully. I shrug my shoulders: ,,I guess. My parents are still in France. Couldn't you stay too?“ Fred rests his chin on his hand, eyeing me: ,,No, I'm afraid I can't. Mom always wants us home at christmas. But you could come to our place, if you want.“ I look up, my heart racing. ,,Oh, I don't want to bother your family...“ I say. ,,God, no way. Mom would love to meet you, I'm sure. If you'd like to come, I'll just ask her.“ I smile: ,,I'd love to. But please make sure, no one is annoyed by my presence.“ Fred shakes his head: ,,There's no way.“ I shove a spoon of chocolate pudding into my mouth and stare at him in silence.

Two plates of a variety of foods, three firewhiskeys and four glasses of this weird golden liquor later we go back to slowdancing. I was a bit tipsy already and so was Fred. His cheeks are glowing red and his hands are warmer than they were earlier. ,,George thought I was kidding when I told him that you're my date for the ball,“ Fred says as I lean against his chest. I hear his heart beating faster and faster. ,,First I wasn't sure if you were kidding, too,“ he adds. I put my hand onto his shoulder and close my eyes: ,,I'd never.“ I hear him sigh. The room was way emptier now. A few Ravenclaws and Hufflepuffs were still on the dancefloor. Neville and Ginny were slowdancing as well just like Krum and Hermione. Ron and Harry sat down to eat and stare at Hermione a while ago and Pansy ran off a couple minutes ago, after Zabini yelled at her for stepping on his feet when they were dancing. I was content and happy like I never was, feeling Freds hand on my waist, smelling his fragrance and hearing his heartbeat. ,,Do you wanna go outside for a bit?“ Fred suddenly asks. I open my eyes and nod: ,,Sure. Are you alright?“ Fred runs his hand through his hair and takes a deep breath. ,,I'm feeling a bit dizzy to be honest.“ 

We walk towards he big balcony and away from the loud music and the smells of the buffet into the cold, dark, silent night. The moon was shining and hundreds of stars sparkle in the sky. They were beautiful. It's been a long time since I saw them shimmer this brightly. Maybe it was the alcohol but I felt very sentimental all of sudden. Tears stream down my face. ,,y/n?“ Fred gasps. I wipe the tears away and blink rapidly: ,,I'm just a bit...It's such a beautiful night. I don't want it to end.“ Fred looks at me shocked. Then he pulls me closer, one hand around my waist, his head resting on my shoulder. ,,There's still so much time left. Don't worry,“ he says softly. My heart feels like it's burning. It wasn't the night I was sentimental about. I think it was Fred. The knowledge that he will never look at me like he did a few hours ago again. That he'll just act like nothing happened in a few days. ,,Can I ask you for a favour?“ he suddenly asks. I look up at him. ,,Can I kiss you?“ he asks. My heart misses out a  few beats. I stare at him for a second, completely paralized. ,,Of course...“ I gasp. He pulls me closer and I close my eyes. I feel his burning lips on mine, a wave of heat streaming through my whole body, my heart crashing against my ribs. It feels like eternity. Then he pulls back, his cheeks blushing and looking pretty flustered. I pull him into a hug and lean my head on his chest. He wraps his arms around me and rests his head on mine. We stay like that for at least half an hour, talking about the music playing in the background.

,,Let's dance a little more,“ Fred says and pulls me inside the great hall again, holding me close. I follow his lead and we dance all night. Only when the room was completely empty we came to a halt. ,,I think I'm passing out any second now...“ I joke and look at Fred. All the alcohol in our systems was gone at this point. ,,Let's go up then,“ he answers and takes my hand. We walk out of the great hall and up to the common room. Just when I was about to say goodbye to Fred, Hermione comes down the stairs thats lead to the girls rooms. ,,y/n, we've got somewhat of a problem...Lavender brought Ron up with her. He was very very drunk and...vomited all over your bed.“ I look at Fred who just rolls his eyes at the mention of his younger brother. ,,I'll take her in tonight and make him regret what he did tomorrow,“ Fred says. I look at him. He takes me to his room? Is that even allowed? ,,I hope I'm around,“ Hermione says with an evil smile. Fred looks at me: ,,Only if it's alright for you of course. I can go and wake this idiot up to clean up his mess.“ I shake my head: ,,Let him rest. As long as it's alright with Oliver and George...“ Fred nods and we go up the stairs to the boys dorms. 

Fred walks in first. ,,Turn out the light, you idiot!“ I hear George groan. ,,We've got trainig in the morning...“ Oliver sighs. ,,Guys, is it okay if y/n spends the night?“ Fred asks. Silence. ,,Depends on what you're trying to-“ ,,Shut up, George. Ron puked into her bed.“ A sigh follows. ,,I don't care but turn out the bloody lights...“ Oliver says. Fred comes out, a self knitted pullover with an F on it and a pair of jogging pants in his hands. ,,You can change in the bathroom...“ He points to a door at the end of the corridor. I nod and step into the cold room, closing the door behind me and looking around. It was smaller than the girls bathroom. I'm slipping off the heels and dress and change into the way more comfortable clothes Fred gave me. My dress folded neatly, I open the door and walk towards Fred. He shoves me into the dorm silently and leads me towards the bed in complete darkness. I feel around for the end of his bed and then lay down carefully. It smelled just like him. I feel him laying down next to me and covering me with the blanket. ,,Night...“ he mumbles. I turn towards him and snuggle against his chest. He puts an arm around me.

[penninstitute]

Case #9910208

Statement of Adrienne Tasker, regarding her childhood friend Kennedy Holst. Original statement given February 8th, 1991.

First things first: I will never forgive the town for what they did to Kennedy Holst.

She was the one good thing I had there, and everything about her was destroyed to create something worse.

I know I should start from the beginning and give a proper explanation, but Corsica deserves this, even if they’ll never read it. Whatever thing is ruining that town, whatever thing ruined Kennedy, it needs to be said that it is horrible and disgusting and I couldn’t live with myself if I didn’t tell anyone.

Kennedy and I grew up in Corsica, Pennsylvania. The Holsts moved into town one July evening when I was four, and my mother made fast friends with them. Right away, Kennedy and I took a liking to each other. We were the same age, we both had older siblings who also became friends, though I don’t know what really happened to Josephine after she got out. I know Alex still lives at home. He never did escape, not the way I did. Nor the way Kennedy did, as fucked up as it was.

I don’t know if I feel bad for him or not. I think I was scared for him, once, but now… I don’t know. I don’t know if he knows what’s really happening there.

I’m not sure I do, either. But I’m not afraid of it anymore. Just angry.

There is--was--a house in Corsica, Pennsylvania, we called the Crucible House. It was old and abandoned and always smelled vaguely of smoke. People reported hearing screaming or smelling burning hair when walking by, but investigations into the place found nothing. It was named the Crucible House because of rumors about modern-day witch trials that took place there, rumors about girls being burned at the stake within its walls. I thought it was all bullshit, just a spooky story told by the seniors in high school to scare the freshmen that had just read The Crucible for their summer work--watch out, or you’ll get sent to the Crucible House.

I thought it was entertaining. Now it’s not funny anymore.

Kennedy and I stuck together all the way through high school. The two of us were best friends, you wouldn’t find us anywhere without the other. I told her all of my secrets, and she… well, I thought she told me all of her own.

I was a little in love with her, if I’m being honest. She was so sweet, one of the kindest people I’d ever met. Despite her family’s struggles with money and mental health and whatnot, she managed to keep smiling through it all. Managed to keep her chin up, almost until the end. She was… so pretty, too, with long blonde hair and the prettiest brown eyes. Admittedly, I was more than a little in love with her.

We were two parts of a whole, people would joke. We were fated to be friends, platonic soulmates in their eyes. Though I would’ve liked to drop the platonic part. I don’t know if Kennedy would have felt the same way, before everything happened, but… I think she did. I think she still felt it, even after everything. I kind of hope she did.

I just don’t know if that would bring her back to me. I’d like it to. But I don’t know how any of this works.

Kennedy stole a lot. It was a bad habit of hers, something she did all the time, she’d pocket anything small enough that she could get away with. Sometimes, she would return things, but more often than not she’d just forget what she’d bought and what she’d stolen. I thought it was a bit endearing, the forgetfulness, but the stealing was a touch concerning.

But I never bothered her about it. It was her life, who was I to tell her what she could and couldn’t do? Fuck capitalism, anyways, these were big stores that could handle a few losses. It wasn’t that big of a deal.

But then her father found out.

James Holst started out a kind, understanding, patient man. I remember him, back when I was little, he was always so sweet. He was like a father to me, since mine was never in the picture, up until sophomore year of high school. Then, he began to change. I don’t know what it was about him, but he grew temperamental, rude… hot-headed, I guess works. And his eyes were a horrible red, it was unnatural--they’d always been brown, but one day they weren’t, and quite honestly, I’m still a bit scared of him. I don’t know where he is now, but he’s not dead. He did not die in that fire, that night.

James caught Kennedy stealing one afternoon, and yelled at her out in the yard for everyone to see. It was one little thing, and he brought Hell down on her head, screaming like a lunatic--it scared me. It scared my brother, it scared Josephine, it brought Kennedy to hysterics. And the neighbors just watched like it was a show. Kennedy’s mother looked almost amused as James shouted about damnation and Hell and how Kennedy was awful, horrible for all of these little things. He even said some queerphobic bullshit about Kennedy and Josephine, and nobody did a fucking thing.

I don’t know how I didn’t notice it until that moment, but everyone’s eyes had turned so… cruel. My own mother, who would have clutched her pearls at the idea of someone screaming at a child, was silently staring, eyes alight with intrigue, as if wondering how this would play out.

Kennedy was dragged inside, and I had never felt more afraid than I did in that moment. I honest to God thought James was going to beat her.

I almost wish he had, as horrible as that sounds, because she may have been able to escape that. She may have been able to get away, if that was all he did.

Later that night, my mom said we were going out with the Holsts for dinner and a show to try and lighten the mood. Alex and I were apprehensive, but I went over to Kennedy’s house to bring her back to mine so we could get ready together. She needed the space from her father.

She was quiet when she came over. Had I known that would be our last night together, that quiet, afraid July evening like the one she moved in on, I would have done more, I would have said something, I would have told her everything I felt. But the truth of the matter is that I didn’t, and I don’t know if I will ever be able to tell her.

I remember how she looked that night, in a plain white dress and sneakers, because she didn’t have any nicer shoes to wear. I thought it was cute, charming--the typical thoughts of a young girl who was hopelessly in love with her best friend. I sat her down, took her by the shoulders, and told her that I would always be there for her, through everything, and she could tell me if things were worse than they seemed. She could tell me what was wrong, what was going on with her father.

“It’s over, Adri,” Kennedy said. “We won’t have to worry about it anymore.”

I didn’t know what she meant. But I loved her, I trusted her, I had to trust her. So I did.

I shouldn’t have.

I only realized just how bad things were when we pulled up in front of the Crucible House. James was there, waiting, with his wife and Josephine, and about two dozen other people from town. It’s a small town, I had known these people for years, the families had been nothing but kind, but that night--that night their eyes were cold.

Millicent Jacobs, the kind, young, single mother of two-year-old Evan Jacobs. Romeo Payes, my English teacher. Ellie Johnson, the eldest daughter of the Johnsons. Kind, regular people, big names in a town of roughly 300, people I knew and people that knew me.

Turns out I didn’t know them at all.

The building was hot when we entered. Stuffy, stifling heat. I began to sweat almost immediately, and it was disgustingly dry inside. I couldn’t get away. I was afraid, I didn’t know what was going on, this wasn’t what my mom had said was happening, and I did not trust a word anyone said to me from there on.

James sat Kennedy down on a chair at the front. Everyone else took their seats in benches that surrounded the large, wooden stake in the center of the room. It was all so closed in, so hot and cloying and awful, and Kennedy looked afraid and resigned all at once and I wanted nothing more than to hold her hand, than to run with her, than to get away.

But I sat and looked pretty, because I could not escape without these people going after me--I knew, then, that they would chase me if I ran. I didn’t know how to get us away safely, so I sat, frozen, clutching Alex’s hand so tightly it hurt. Josephine held my other one. We didn’t know what was happening, but we were afraid, and we knew it would be bad, whatever it was.

James tied Kennedy’s wrists above her head, pinning them to the wooden stake. I clutched Josephine and Alex’s hands so tightly I thought I would break them. I couldn’t do a thing as the kindling was arranged.

Kennedy did not scream when she was set on fire.

The crowd cheered when she went up in flames. I think I may have been screaming. Josie and I were crying. Alex didn’t even look present. Kennedy burned alive in her pretty white dress without a sound, and everyone was happy.

She died.

And then she didn’t.

Cheers turned to screaming when the building caught fire, and Kennedy tore away from the stake, still burning. Her eyes were golden in the rising flames, and she shoved through the crowd, leaving footprints burned into the wood in her wake, and she grabbed my arm and ran.

It burned. There is a handprint scorched into my skin where she grabbed me. We left that house, and she left me on my front porch in tears.

“Stop crying, Adri,” she said softly, “it’s over.”

I was afraid of her in that moment. She was different, leaving burned footprints in her wake, smoke curling off of her shoulders, looking untouched by the flames. She did not touch me again, and disappeared before anyone returned to find her.

The next morning, the Holst household had been burned to the ground. Josephine had taken the car and left. I moved away for college two months later, and I’m never going back.

FOLLOW-UP NOTES

- This is not the first time Corsica, Pennsylvania has come up. In Case #9971014, Ms. Coombs moved to Corsica before her home caught fire in 2002, and she has not been seen since.

- Fire seems to be a commonality between these two statements. It’s interesting, to say the least, along with the sudden shift from kindness to cruelty noted here. I don’t know what would cause such a thing, but whatever is afflicting this town seems to enjoy causing pain.

- As for Ms. Holst, she reportedly died in a house fire on July 19th, 1990, though that is clearly not the case if what’s stated here is true.

- The people of Corsica, Pennsylvania refuse to speak to Institute staff at all. I may send Felix, Blair, or even myself up to check out the town in person, once the Skinsnatcher case is over with.

[gb-fics]

Valentine’s Day (1)

AU Fanfiction:

Kiryuuin Shou x Kyan Yutaka (Golden Bomber)

... also Shoko x Yutako.

Note: This is another high school fic, set in the same universe from Golden Bomber’s Glamorous Butterfly Campaign with Jex, that I already used for the fic about GB Academy. You don’t need to know that fic, though, it’s a stand-alone. I just thought it was a shame I didn’t make the couples gay there, because somehow I thought the world could need some lesbian Golden Bomber fanfiction for whatever reason XD If that’s not your thing however, there are two plotlines, one between Shou and Yutaka and one between Shoko and Yutako. They keep switching, so technically you can skip through and only follow one couple, too. Also, I’ll post this in two part. Happy Valentine’s Day! (^-^)

“Just a little bit more!”, Yutako demanded, holding up the bowl of sugar. In her hands it looked like a weapon. In Yutako’s hands almost everything did.

“No!”, Shoko protested and jumped to the side to shield the pot on the stove with her body.

Usually, she wasn’t one to pick fights with Yutako. She was usually one to give in to Yutako and to clean up the disaster afterwards that she herself had seen coming all along.

But today, Shoko had something worth fighting for. Some things were too important to let even Yutako butcher them.

“It will make the chocolate sweeter”, Yutako said.

“No, it will ruin it by making it crunchy. You will be able to taste nothing but sugar”, Shoko lectured calmly and stirred the liquid chocolate with the whisk in her right hand.

“No arguing with our perfect housewife I guess.” Yutako gave in and put the sugar bowl down with a loud clonk. She spilled some of the sugar.

Shoko tried not to feel offended by the fact that Yutako had called her a perfect housewife. That was what Yutako probably saw in her. She expected Shoko to get married to a nice, boring guy and stay home to cook for him and clean the apartment. It was what everyone seemed to expect of her. Because she was calm and neat and so very much not like Yutako. No one looked at Yutako and thought she would devote her life to a man. People looked at her and thought she would be the first woman on the moon or the first female Prime Minister of Japan. It didn’t matter if she was qualified or not. Yutako had the air of a woman, who would surely be the first in something. She wasn’t meant to settle down. She was born to conquer.

Deep inside, Shoko felt adventurous, too. She just wasn’t so good at showing it.

“I’m just worried about the chocolate”, Shoko said, sounding a little huffy. “You know I’m an expert on the field.”

“I know you love chocolate”, Yutaka confirmed and pushed herself off the kitchen counter. Like all of her motions, she did it with force. “They should rather call you Choco.”

Shoko rolled her eyes visibly, before she turned towards the pot again. The right consistency was important.

Yutako stepped up behind her, leaning in to inhale deeply. She wasn’t quite hugging her, but Shoko could feel the heat of her body against her back anyway. As always, Yutako wore a thick sweater as if she was freezing. It was very warm inside the kitchen.

“Smells delicious”, Yutako observed.

Shoko bend her head a little, too. Just moments ago, she had been able to smell the faint hint of cacao in the air, but now it was concealed by the sweet chemistry of Yutako’s hairspray. Yutako smelled like the human version of bubble-gum.

“Did you get out the baking forms?”, Shoko asked.

She had been distracted for a moment, and the chocolate started to get sticky already. They had to hurry, otherwise it would burn. Shoko had wanted to use a double boiler, but Yutako had protested with her usual no-risk-no-fun mentality. Now, they were risking their chocolate.

“I was supposed to do that?!”, Yutako shouted and took a step back.

She was still standing so close that Shoko nearly went deaf.

“I swear, I saw them around here somewhere earlier. Somewhere, somewhere”, Yutako muttered and Shoko heard some worrisome clattering behind herself.

She turned off the heat and took the pot off the stove. It was quite heavy, but her arms were stronger than her appearance suggested.

“Put them on the counter”, she ordered, hoping that Yutako would for once listen to her.

She carried the pot over to the counter and Yutako slammed down two backing forms onto its surface. She exclaimed a loud “Ha!” of victory. With her, making chocolates was like going to war.

Shoko lifted the pot, carefully pouring the liquid chocolate into the small, heart-shaped forms. She spilled some of it, but once the chocolate dried, they would be able to scratch off the ugly bits and be left with about 30 small hearts of delicious chocolate.

The chocolate didn’t pour out of the pot quite that easily anymore as Shoko reached the last row. She tilted the pot more. Her arms were starting to feel heavy. She tried to shift the weight in her hands, her lower arm brushing against the bottom of the pot that was still hot.

Shoko winced and put down the pot onto the counter.

“Did you burn yourself?”, Yutako asked.

Shoko held up her bare lower arm to check for the red mark forming there.

“It’s not so bad”, she said, making a face. “It had already cooled down somewhat.”

“Idiot”, Yutako said and grabbed Shoko’s wrist, pulling her over to the sink.

Her grip was very firm, but that just seemed part of her personality. She turned on the cold water, dragging Shoko’s arm under the tap forcefully. She kept holding on to her wrist as if she wanted to make sure Shoko did not pull back.

Shoko wondered if Yutako could feel her pulse. It had quickened rapidly. Probably due to the pain, Shoko assumed. A physical reaction. Adrenaline. Fear of dying. Something like that.

The water was so cold, it slowly started to numb her arm. The pain was nearly gone, but Shoko didn’t feel much else, either. Yutako’s hand, though, she could still sense. It felt warm.

“It’s enough now”, Shoko protested and jerked her wrist free.

“Always so clumsy”, Yutako said and switched off the water. She looked at Shoko affectionately.

Shoko hurried to turn her face. She grabbed a kitchen towel and used it to dry her arm. Yutako wiped her hand off at her skirt.

Shoko felt weird when Yutako looked at her like that. She also felt weird when she grabbed her wrist like that without warning or when she walked up from behind so close. She felt like there was nowhere left to hide.

“We’re missing two hearts”, she observed to change the topic.

“The boys can do without those. I’m was planning to eat one half myself anyway.”

Shoko huffed.

“Have you decided whom to give your chocolates to this year?”, she asked innocently.

Not that she cared a lot whom Yutako gave her chocolates to. It was her decision. On Valentine’s Day, the girls gave chocolates to the guy they liked. That was just how it was done. Shoko didn’t really like anyone, but she liked making chocolates with Yutako. They did so every year since middle school.

“I’m just going to do the unexpected, you know”, Yutako said and shrugged. “I don’t want to impress anyone, so I will just see who doesn’t get any chocolate this year and give him mine. My guess is on Shou. He is weird. But I’d feel sorry for him, if he didn’t get chocolates from anyone.”

Shoko watched Yutako from the side for a moment.

She tried to imagine what it must feel like for a shy, awkward guy like Shou to get chocolates from such a pretty, popular girl like Yutako. Surely, he would be overjoyed. Shoko in his place would be overjoyed.

“And it’s not like any man is worthy of my love anyway, so I might as well give it to charity”, Yutako added.

She was speaking flippant, but Shoko knew her better than that. Although she acted like she just didn’t care who got her chocolate, she was seriously worried for the people who would not get chocolates at all. Underneath her brash attitude, Yutako was quite soft. She didn’t like people noticing, though.

“You gave chocolates to that guy from third year last Valentines”, Shoko reminded her. “He wasn’t needing charity, though.”

Yutako gave a heavy sigh.

It was true that her crush had been so popular, that he had received chocolates from a lot of girls. It was Yutako he had asked out on a Valentine’s date, however. Shoko hadn’t doubted for a moment, that he would pick Yutako. She wasn’t the prettiest girl, who had given chocolates to him, nor the smartest or the kindest. She just had that personality that drew you in so much, you forgot there were other people around to compare her to. Yutako became her own measure by sheer force of will.

“I was young and stupid. I liked him, but where did it lead? Turned out he was boring like the rest of them. I don’t need a disappointment like that again.”

Shoko was all too aware that Yutako had liked the guy. It had bothered her back then. Thinking of it, her stomach still felt weird as if she had just received bad news. They had been dating for only three weeks, though, before Yutako changed her mind again. Shoko had been relieved when she did.

“What about you?”, Yutako asked. “Still giving yours to that beau Yutaka?”

Shoko tried not to pay attention to the judgement in Yutako’s voice. She shrugged.

“I guess”, she said. “He’s cute.”

Truthfully, she did not have any strong feelings towards Yutaka. She didn’t understand why girls giggled in his presence or blushed when he talked to them. But objectively speaking, he was probably handsome and he had an easy-going air about him that Shoko had always found likeable.

The reason she had chosen Yutaka as her Valentines was that he was a safe bet. A lot of girls liked him. That meant Shoko wouldn’t embarrass herself by giving chocolates to him. There was nothing weird about liking Yutaka. People just liked Yutaka. No one would question that Shoko did, too. And since he was so popular with the girls, the chances that he would react to Shoko’s gift and she’d end up on a date with him were close to zero.

Occasionally Shoko wondered if the other girls just pretended to like boys. At least, like them to that extend. Shoko didn’t dislike Yutaka. He seemed good looking and fun. But she did not get excited by his charms like the other girls seemed to get excited by them. Shoko had always assumed they just acted excited, because they enjoyed the drama and the giggling with their friends. Just like Shoko pretended she cared for giving Yutaka chocolates, when really, she only cared about making them with Yutako.

But then Yutako had seemed invested when she had given the chocolates to her crush last year. She had cared about his reaction. Shoko did not care about Yutaka’s reaction. If anything, the thought that he might actually ask her out was horrifying.

She wasn’t sure if that meant something was wrong with her, or if the rest of the world just hadn’t let her in on the play they were staging.

“We should put the chocolates into the fridge, so they turn solid faster”, Yutako suggested and took a step towards the counter.

“No!”, Shoko exclaimed and held Yutako back by the arm. “They need to cool down first. It will affect the taste otherwise.”

Yutako shook her head.

“You are so serious about this”, she said somewhat teasing.

“We have been doing this for years already. Shouldn’t you remember how it’s done by now?”, Shoko scolded her.

Yutako made a funny looking gesture with her arms, as if she wanted to push Shoko’s words aside physically.

“I have grown no more patient over the years”, she said.

“Well, I’m also looking forward to wrapping them up”, Shoko admitted as a compromise.

She had cute wrapping paper upstairs in her room and several pretty cards that she could choose from. She had no idea what to write to Yutaka, though. There was nothing she wanted to tell him. She liked how cute the cards looked, though.

“Are you kidding me?!”, Yutako shouted and threw back her head, laughing loudly.

Her laughter was another reason Shoko didn’t understand why girls liked boys. Boys never looked pretty when they laughed. Yutako, though, Yutako looked dazzling. She understood perfectly well why boys liked girls. But the other way around, it remained a mystery to her.

“I can’t wait to eat them!”, Yutako said.

* * *

Yutaka put down the controller. They were hanging out in Jun’s basement currently, playing video games. Jun had the biggest space and owned the most games, too. He was a little spoiled. Sometimes, Yutaka envied him for that.

“Kenji, your turn”, he offered and held the controller out to his friend.

He had grown bored with playing anyway. Currently, Yutaka grew bored with everything. It wasn’t the fault of his friends. Just lately, their conversations felt somehow shallow to him. It was all about sports and girls and although Yutaka liked sports and he liked girls, there was really only so much to say about these two topics and he had spent 16 years already, saying it all.

“Why so gloomy lately?”, Kenji asked, but took the controller from him. “Cheer up, tomorrow is Valentine’s Day.”

Yutaka groaned. He had planned it out weeks ago already. He had booked a place at a cute café that would surely be packed tomorrow and he had made absolutely sure that his parents had other plans for the day and wouldn’t be home until the late evening. Shortly, he had done what he had done every year so far since he found out about boobies.

“Yes, I’m sure you will get tons of chocolate again”, Jun agreed. “You are always the most popular, although Kenji is much taller.”

“Maybe the girls hope he will grow, if they feed him enough”, Kenji joked.

Yutaka snorted. He wasn’t even in the mood to argue.

“It’s just so damn boring”, he whined. “I will check which girls gave me chocolates and then ask the prettiest one out. And since it will be Valentine’s Day and the mood is romantic and I know she likes me anyway and since she is desperate to show off to their friends who didn’t get a date, it will be so easy to make her fall for me. It’s boring.”

“Good for you, if you think a cute girl falling for you is boring. Others have to work hard for that, you know?”, Jun scolded him.

Yutaka knew that Jun worried about not receiving any chocolates every year, because he deemed himself less popular and less attractive than his friends. He was proven wrong every year, though. Yutaka mused that Jun had something of a reliable if awkward vibe to him that girls liked. If Yutaka had to choose between the three of them, he would have given his chocolates to Jun, too. He wasn’t one to toy with your feelings.

“Yes!”, Kenji confirmed. “I’m already all nervous.”

Yutaka knew that Kenji had no reason to be nervous, but that he still was. Beneath his good looks and his silliness, he was actually quite shy.

“I just want something different. I’m doing the same thing over and over again, getting in and out of short-time relationships. But it’s not fulfilling at all. So, why do I keep doing it?”

Yutaka had been thinking about this for a while already. Lately, he felt like he had stepped out onto the side-lines and once he saw the game from the outside, he just wondered what the fuck everyone else was doing. Valentine’s Day was just the peak of a very ridiculous iceberg.

“Maybe you should do something different then”, Kenji suggested. “Don’t take the cutest girl out on a date. Take the one you expected chocolates from the least. Like, the shy girl you would usually overlook. The girl with the weird glasses you would never ask out on a date normally. Maybe they’ll surprise you.”

Yutaka hummed and stared at the tv screen. He hadn’t been aware that Jun had paused the game.

“So, you think I should go out with the most unexpected person, who gives me chocolates?”, he assured.

The idea didn’t sound so bad. He did tend to be slightly superficial about his relationships, maybe that was why it had never worked out. Maybe the girls he usually overlooked were more interesting indeed. And even if the date still sucked, maybe it would make a plain girl happy that a popular guy like himself paid attention to her. He’d be doing a good deed. Charity, so to say.

“You know, I actually like the idea”, he concluded. “But how to decide who is the most unexpected?”

“We will look through the cards together!”, Kenji blurted out and it dawned on Yutaka that he had suggested the whole thing for Yutaka’s amusement as much as his own.

“Yes, we’ll take a vote. And you have to follow through with it”, Jun said.

“Yep, no chickening out, because there is this really cute girl all of a sudden”, Kenji demanded.

“Alright, alright.” Yutaka nodded. “I promise, I’ll obey to your decision.”

* * *

Shoko shuffled on her seat, looking over to the classroom door. Yutako was late. That wasn’t unusual, but today was Valentine’s Day. The first chocolates were given out before class even started and none of the girls liked to miss out on spying who had given chocolate to whom. Valentine’s Day wasn’t about love. It was a social event.

Shoko’s own set of chocolates still sat on her desk. She had meant to drop them off at Yutaka’s locker before first hour started, but there had been a line. A line. Shoko wasn’t sure if she found that unsettling – because so many girls seemed to like a teenage boy who was so, well, so very much like a teenage boy – or relieving, because it meant Yutaka had so many confessions to choose from, that he would surely overlook Shoko’s.

She looked at her bag of chocolate. It was wrapped in pink paper and ribbons in different shades of red. It contained ten small chocolates shaped as hearts. They had had 28 hearts to begin with. Shoko had eaten one of them to check if the taste had turned out sufficient. (It had.) Yutako had eaten seven. It left ten for each of them to give away.

Shoko looked over to Shou’s empty seat. He was late, too. Unless Yutako he wasn’t one to run late usually. Shoko wondered if Yutako had bumped into him and given him the chocolates. She should probably have waited to see if he wouldn’t receive some from someone else, but then that wasn’t very likely. Shou wasn’t unattractive – at least in Shoko’s eyes, but she felt for his outer appearance as strongly as she felt for Yutaka’s; which wasn’t very strongly at all. But he was a loner, someone who always stuck to himself. Shoko assumed that girls didn’t give him any chocolates, because there was something intimidating about him. He didn’t seem to want to get close to people. But maybe that was just an act. Shoko was sure that if Yutako gave him her chocolates, he would drop his misanthropy immediately and hope for a date. Yutako had that effect on people. Even if you hated the entire human race, under no circumstances could Shoko image someone hating Yutako. Of course, it wasn’t very likely that Yutako would go out with Shou. It was just charity chocolates, as she called it. But then it was Yutako. You could never be sure what would be going on in her mind next. Shoko didn’t understand why she worried about it so much.

She felt physically unwell, thinking that Shou and Yutako were running late, because they were setting up a date right now. Shoko didn’t have any plans yet. She had assumed she would hang out with Yutako in the afternoon. But if Yutako changed her plans now, it would leave Shoko behind alone, wondering what Yutako was doing on her date in the meantime. It wasn’t a very fun perspective for Valentine’s Day.

The door opened and Yutako rushed into the room. She always moved as if driven forward by an unstoppable energy.

The first thing Shoko noticed was that her hair was slightly out of shape, as if she hadn’t brushed it properly before leaving the house. The second thing she noticed was the box of chocolates in her hand. Relief washed over Shoko, because it meant she hadn’t given the chocolates to anyone yet. The relief was instantly followed by panic.

The box of chocolate wasn’t the one they had wrapped up together yesterday. The wrapping looked professional. It looked like the box had been bought at a store.

That left two things to worry about. What had happened to the chocolates they had made together? Had Yutako indeed given them to someone already? Did she have a date? And where had she gotten the other chocolates from? Had someone given them to her? A guy who liked her so much, that he was trying to bribe her into going out with him on Valentine’s Day? Had the bribe worked? But then, guys didn’t bring chocolates on Valentine’s Day. He could have waited until White Day, if he wanted to confess. On Valentine’s Day, the girls confessed. Did those chocolates mean, that a girl had confessed to Yutako? Like, a female girl? Shoko knew that that was in fact possible. If girls liked girls, they would surely like Yutako. Not just because she was pretty and funny and so adorably crazy, but also because she radiated the feeling that she wouldn’t mind. She was so unlike all the other girls at their school, that Shoko had wondered, too. But she knew Yutako liked guys. She knew that for sure. But maybe the girl who had brought the chocolates hadn’t known? And if Yutako had accepted the chocolates, did that mean she had accepted the confession, too? By a girl? Or had she just wanted to be polite?

Shoko felt a piercing pain in her chest, that somehow made it hard to breathe. Or maybe it had been hard to breathe before the pain already, she wasn’t sure. Her head felt dizzy. Possibly from oxygen shortage. When was the last time she had taken in a breath?

“Hey”, Yutako greeted cheerfully, putting the box of chocolates onto her table next to Shoko’s and dropping her school bag to the floor.

Shoko stared at the box of chocolates. She tried to focus on her breathing. The wrapping paper around it was white. The print on the side was golden. There was a golden sticker on it, too. It reflected the lights overhead. On one side, the paper was slightly crumpled, as if Yutako had clenched it too tightly there. Her breathing evened out.

“Where is that box of chocolate coming from?”, Shoko asked.

“Ah, I bought it this morning”, Yutako said and sat down. She sat with her legs spread widely, although her skirt was very short. Shoko could see more of her bare thighs than was appropriate. She looked away.

“It was insane in that store. I had to physically fight off three other women to get it. I almost ran late.”

She brushed over her hair with the back of her hand as if trying to flatten it that way. It looked funny, because most people would have tried to run their fingers through it to untangle it. Yutako didn’t use her hands like a hair brush, though. She used them like a flattening iron. Somehow, Shoko found that adorable.

“And you know what? It wasn’t even worth it.” Yutako slammed down her palm onto the table plate. For a moment, Shoko honestly believed the table would just fall apart under the impact.

“I was thinking of that sad little fucker Shou and how he would feel, if he didn’t get any chocolates and just when I got here, I caught him next to the entrance, sliding a box of chocolates into his school bag. A cute yellow one. I feel betrayed. Men. You can’t trust any of them.”

Shoko chuckled. She liked it when Yutako talked about men like that. Like she didn’t really like them at all.

“What happened to the ones we made, though?”, she asked.

Yutako shrugged nonchalantly and pulled her hands up into the sleeves of her sweater. Only her fingertips were showing.

“I ate them”, she said.

For a moment, Shoko just stared at her, before she snorted with laughter.

“You are absolutely the worst”, she concluded.

“Good I did!”, Yutako exclaimed. “He didn’t deserve them anyway!”

Still grinning Shoko shook her head. She was kind of glad Yutako had eaten them by herself, though. She was right, Shou did not deserve them.

Yutako pulled one of her legs onto the chair. Her skirt slid up even further. Thankfully, the legwarmers were covering a great deal of her skin.

“I’m just sad they’re all gone already”, Yutako pouted.

“You shouldn’t have eaten them all at once”, Shoko said calmly.

“We should have made more.”

Shoko looked onto the chocolates still sitting on her desk.

“You know, you can have mine”, she offered. “Since you like them so much.”

She reached out to push the box across the table. She could hear the blood rushing in her ears as if her heartbeat had decided to step it up to highspeed.

Shoko had no idea why she felt like that. She was just being nice to a friend. If Yutako liked the chocolates so much, she ought to have them. For Shoko, it had been more about the making anyway.

Yutako hesitated.

“What about Yutaka?”, she asked.

Shoko brushed it off with a small gesture.

“You know”, she said. “I don’t think he deserves them either.”

Yutako leaned forward and lowered her voice to a stage whisper. She was unable to really whisper, since her voice always remained loud, but Shoko got the idea.

“He cleaned out his locker today and left it open, just so the girls could leave their chocolates freely. The arrogance.”

Shoko had to admit that it was a pretty arrogant attitude. Yutaka wasn’t hoping for chocolates, he was just assuming he’d get them. He certainly did get a lot of chocolates, though.

“See”, Shoko said. “One box more or less. He won’t even notice. So, take them.”

Yutako looked at the neatly wrapped up chocolates Shoko had pushed towards her. She bit her lower lip. Yutako usually wore lip-gloss that made her lips look shiny. Shoko always wondered if it made her lips taste artificial or just sweet.

Suddenly, Yutako’s expression lit up.

“Hey, you know what”, she said. “You can just take mine. Give them to Yutaka instead. I won’t feel so guilty for eating yours then.”

She took up the white box with the golden print and put it down in front of Shoko.

Shoko stared down onto the box. She knew that it was just a simple exchange. It was basically a business agreement. They hadn’t exchanged Valentine’s chocolate just now. Not in a girls dating girls way at least.

Shoko felt her cheeks heating up anyway.

She reached out and touched the box. She wasn’t sure why she was doing it, though. Somehow, she just wanted to make sure that it was real. That she had really gotten those chocolates from Yutako and that they physically existed. Let alone the thought of giving them to Yutaka seemed like blasphemy to her. Yutako had bought those chocolates. She had fought three other women for them. She had almost been late. Admittedly, she hadn’t done so specifically for Shoko, but the sacrifice seemed too big for Yutaka anyway. He would have deserved Shoko’s chocolates. But Yutako was too good for him.

“I think I’d rather eat them myself”, Shoko said and made a face that gained her a grin from Yutako. “I don’t feel like standing in line.”

“A wise decision, if I may say so”, Yutako agreed, but then a frown appeared on her forehead. “But damn, no. You will have to eat the lame-ass bought ones, while I ate almost all the good ones, we made ourselves.”

“They weren’t that good”, Shoko pointed out.

She was pretty sure that the bought ones were created with far more skill.

“No way!”, Yutako shouted. She had a way of raising her voice in the middle of the conversation that made it impossible to tell if she was angry or excited or just temporarily hard of hearing. “You are so good at making them. They are the best chocolates in the world! We ought to split.”

Shoko gave a small shrug. A part of her expected Yutako to just rip open both boxes right then and there to split up the chocolates.

“Fine”, she gave in, just because she knew that protesting wouldn’t help her with Yutako. She had a way of getting her will.

“Great”, Yutako said and pulled Shoko’s chocolates towards her a little closer as if making sure no one would try to steal them from her. “I’ll drop by at your place in the afternoon. We can share then.”

And although Shoko knew for sure that it wasn’t a Valentine’s date, she thought that the fact that they had just exchanged chocolates, made it feel a little like a Valentine’s date nonetheless.

* * *

“I think everyone should be gone by now”, Kenji observed.

“I don’t understand why we had to wait so long”, Jun whined. “Everyone else went home thirty minutes ago.”

“We had to give some time to the shy girls, to drop off their chocolates”, Yutaka explained. “Maybe some of them waited until school finished, so no one would see them.”

“And it would be a shame to miss a box by leaving too early, wouldn’t it?”, Kenji chimed happily.

“There is something seriously wrong with the two of you”, Jun muttered as they rounded the corner that led to their lockers.

Kenji’s and Jun’s were farther down the hallway, but Yutaka’s locker was already in clear sight.

Someone was still standing in front of it.

Yutaka stopped short and squinted his eyes, although he could make out the person perfectly well. He wouldn’t have needed to check for the fact that they weren’t wearing a skirt to realize it wasn’t a girl. Not a lot of people had such a large head and a hunched over body posture. Their classmate had an almost comical physical appearance.

“Wait, guys, wait”, he hissed. “What is that dude doing at my locker?”

Kenji and Jun stopped as well.

“That’s Shou, isn’t it?”, Kenji asked.

“Ah, poor guy, he is so awkward, I don’t think anyone gave him chocolates”, Jun said. As someone constantly in fear of ending up exactly in that position, he obviously took pity in him.

Shou opened the locker.

“Is he stealing my chocolates?”, Yutaka whispered at full volume.

Kenji laughed, but tried to supress his voice. Shou was not looking in their direction.

“If that fucker is stealing any of my chocolates …”, Yutaka muttered, not sure what he would do then. He just knew that he wouldn’t be pleased.

What did Shou think he was doing? Yutaka had worked hard for those chocolates. Being as charming as he was, wasn’t easy. He deserved those chocolates.

“It’s your own fault for leaving your locker open.”

Shou knelt down and opened his schoolbag.

“I can’t believe this”, Yutaka said and shook his head. That bastard wouldn’t just grab one or two boxes. He would fill his entire schoolbag with it. It was just impudent.

Shou got out a box wrapped in cute yellow paper from his bag and placed it in Yutaka’s locker.

Yutaka stared.

Shou closed the locker.

Yutaka stared.

Shou buckled his schoolbag again.

Yutaka turned his head to check for the reaction of his friends. He wanted to know if they were staring as well.

“Did he just …?”, Yutaka asked.

Shou got up.

Kenji turned towards him and his grin was very wide.

“Now”, he said. “That was unexpected.”

Yutaka stared at him for another moment. Something about that word rung familiar. Unexpected.

He turned his head to look at Jun.

“You mean …?”, he asked.

“Absolutely”, Jun confirmed, grinning just as widely.

“Fuck”, Yutaka said softly. That had come unexpected. And although he was not a man of honour by any means, he was a man who stood by his word.

“Shou!”, he called out.

Now Shou did look into their direction.

Yutaka had expected him to be embarrassed. He had expected him to blush and maybe stutter an awkward explanation. He had expected him to be delighted, though, once Yutaka offered to go on a date with him.

What he had not expected, however, was Shou to shoulder his schoolbag, turn on his heels and make a run for it.

Yutaka stared after him.

“What the fuck”, he said.

Kenji burst out laughing. This time, he did not lower his voice.

“Run, Yutaka, run!”, he shouted.

“What are you waiting for?!”, Jun shouted and only then did it dawn on Yutaka, that he was actually supposed to do something.

“Fuck”, he said again. Then he started running.

“Shou!”, he shouted. “Shou, wait up!”

Shou showed not the slightest inclination of slowing down. He was aiming for the exit.

Yutaka dropped his bag to the floor while running, hoping that Kenji or Jun would pick it up. The bag no longer bouncing against his thigh as he ran, increased his speed rapidly. Shou was an awkward runner. Pretty much everything about him was awkward. Yutaka caught up to him.

Shou did not stop, though. He kept heading for the exit. Yutaka mobilized his last reserves, dashing past Shou to reach the exit before him. There, he swirled around, stretching out his arms to block the doorway.

“Stop!”, he shouted.

Shou stopped short right before colliding with Yutaka.

Both of them were breathing heavily.

“Why did you run?”, Yutaka gasped.

“Why did you follow me? What do you want from me?”, Shou shot back just as breathlessly.

He was glaring at Yutaka so angrily from behind his glasses, that for a moment, Yutaka really thought it was his fault. But then he remembered why he had chased Shou in the first place.

“I want you”, Yutaka said and straightened himself. “I want you to be my Valentine’s date.”

Shou flinched and then looked around hectically. He looked like a small animal caught in a trap. Suddenly, Yutaka felt almost sorry for cutting his flight like that.

“Don’t say something like that in public”, Shou asked quietly.

Yutaka looked around as well. In the distance behind Shou, he could see Jun and Kenji, but except for them, the building was empty.

“There is no one here”, he soothed Shou.

Not scolding him for being so scared was Yutaka’s idea of a peace offering.

“So, will you?”, he added. “Go out with me today, I mean?”

Shou stared past him. It made Yutaka want to look over his shoulder to check what he was looking at. He forced himself to concentrate on Shou. He had already assumed he would be embarrassed after all.

“No”, Shou said. He did not sound shy. He sounded very determined.

“What?”, Yutaka asked, for a moment doubting he had heard him correctly.

“No”, Shou repeated. “I won’t.”

Yutaka stared at him blankly.

The whole situation was so, well, so unexpected that he had no idea how to react at all. It was all just about improvising. Shou’s whole behaviour was very irritating to say the least.

“But you gave me chocolates right now!”, Yutaka exclaimed.

Shou rolled his eyes.

“You maybe want to broadcast it over the radio station, too?”, he asked.

Yutaka felt guilty for speaking so loudly immediately. Then he felt irritated why he was feeling guilty. Shou had no reason to be so snappy. He was trying to change the topic, too.

“So, you confessed to me, but you don’t want to go out with me?”, Yutaka assured.

Shou nodded grimly. Yutaka thought that he was kind of scary.

“Why not?”, he inquired.

“Why do you want to go out with me?”, Shou asked.

Yutaka stared at him, for a moment struck speechless.

“I, uhm”, he started.

“It’s a joke, isn’t it?”, Shou asked. “I saw you with your friends. You are making fun of me. It’s easy to make fun of people, when you are popular.”

Yutaka raised his open palms, trying to express that he was coming in peace. He wasn’t blocking the door entirely anymore that way. Shou remained standing where he was.

“I’m not making fun of you”, Yutaka said. “I really, seriously want to go on a date with you. It’s not a prank.”

He could see the hesitation on Shou’s face. He had a funny face. Yutaka had never paid attention to just how expressive it was.

“Then why?”, Shou asked.

“Well, me and my friends had this agreement where I have to go out with the most unexpected person, who …”

“Ah”, Shou interrupted him harshly. “So, the joke isn’t on me. It’s on you.”

“What? No!”, Yutaka protested. “It’s not about making me go on an awful date. It’s like, giving a fair chance to the underdogs. You are the underdog this year.”

He reached out to box against Shou’s shoulder lightly.

Shou stared at Yutaka’s fist so irritated that Yutaka regretted it immediately. Shou had something about himself, that made Yutaka feel stupid.

“Giving a fair chance to the underdogs?”, Shou repeated incredulously. “What do you think people are doing? Competing for you? You are so vain.”

“But … but …”, Yutaka stuttered. “People are giving me chocolates! That means they all want to go out with me! I get to choose. It is like a competition.”

“Well, if you are the price, I don’t care for winning”, Shou said and pushed past Yutaka to get outside.

His shoulder brushed against Yutaka, but he did not stop to apologize.

Yutaka turned to look after him.

He still felt very irritated. He had met girls before who liked to play hard to get. Shou wasn’t playing, though. His walls were built up so high, Yutaka hadn’t been able to even peek over them. But luckily, Yutaka wasn’t one to give up easily. He knew what to do about walls. All you needed to do, was bring a ladder.

“At the train station!”, he called after Shou. “West exit. At 4 pm. Say you’ll be there!”

Without turning around, Shou flipped him the finger.

Yutaka was absolutely willing to accept that as a yes.

[headcanonsandmore]

I know I already had a fic request but I have another one 🤭 So I know you like Lavender and think she’s a good person (I do too), I’d like to see a break up conversation between her and Ron where she’s the super mature one who figures everything out like “so umm...” “you want to break up right?” And he’s like “it’s really not about you” and she says “I know, you have feelings for Hermione” and they finish on good terms. and some Romione fluff at the end would be nice🙏🏻

Thank you for the request, @allaboutromione! Hope you like it! 

                        Read on FFN.                Read on AO3. 

‘Endings and Beginnings’

‘What is wrong withyou, Ron?’ Lavender exclaimed, putting her hands back on her hips. ‘Why are youhanging around with her?!’

‘She’s my friend-’

‘In case you don’tremember, she attacked you! For kissing me!’

‘She apologised forthat!’

‘Oh, yes; because thatmakes everything better!’

Lavender Brown washaving a bad day.

Well, more like a badmonth.

Ever since Ron had beenpoisoned, things had gone from bad to worse. To most girls, their boyfriendalmost dying would have been the worst thing to happen, but this is Hogwarts.And Ron Weasley was not new to the concept of almost dying. So far, he had beenknocked out in a giant chess match, and attacked by death-eaters in theMinistry of Magic.

Lavender had been veryimpressed by that. Well, not the ‘almost-dying’ part, obviously. But Ron hadbeen so brave, defending his sister and that Lovegood girl from threedeath-eaters who wanted to kill them. Yes, he had almost died, but that showedjust how much he cared about the people he loved.

She had already beencrushing on him hard by that point, but the department of mysteries had sealedit for Lavender. Ron Weasley was brave, kind, funny, and –as she had noticed atthe start of fifth year- absolutelygorgeous. Lavender had no idea what he’d been up to over the summer, but ithad clearly done him the world of good. The last vestiges of his childhoodpuppy-fat had disappeared from his face, revealing cheekbones to die for. Hischest and arms seemed to have bulked up out of nowhere; his shirts used to hangoff him, now they were straining to retain their stitching.

Then, the department ofmysteries had happened, and he’d got those scars. Normally, Lavender thoughtscars were a little… distressing. But Ron’s scars showed just how brave he was;she’d had no idea what exactly had happened in the ministry that night, but Ronhad been stuck in the hospital wing for a long time afterwards. And when he hadreturned to Gryffindor tower… wow… Lavender’s mouth had dropped open at thesight of him. It wasn’t fair; how was he thatattractive?

This was what Lavenderhad read about in magazines; a “glow-up”. And -boy- had Ron Weasley glowed up!

Why on earth hadn’t anyone-else noticed? Byall accounts, he should have had a queue of people pining after him. He hadalways been cute, but fifth year had changed that; he was no longer an adorableboy, he was now a man. So why did Lavender seem to be the only girl who hadnoticed?

Come to think about it-Lavender thought- barely anyone noticed Ron to begin with. He was always beingshoved to the side whenever those around him got the attention. Which happeneda lot, considering who Ron’s best friends were.  

Lavender could relateto that.

Sure, Parvati waslovely and an amazing friend, but she was also the prettiest girl in the year. Theboys were constantly eyeing up Parvati (even if Parvati herself didn’t seem tonotice), and she was never without at least ten different Valentines cardsevery year. Lavender knew she herself wasn’t the ugliest girl by any means, butshe felt a little sad whenever she was ignored.

Especially when herother dorm-mate had a tendency to get a lot of attention as well. HermioneGranger was considered by many (especially the teachers) to be the brightestwitch of her age. Which was all well and good -Lavender knew how intelligentHermione was- but it did get a little grating after a while.

Parvati was the prettyone, Hermione was the smart one, and… what was Lavender? Parvati’s best friend?The silly girl who got giggly over pictures of teen idols? She hadn’t have herown niche; she was just… Lavender. Not beautiful or intelligent. Just Lavender.

Lavender was alwayssomething of an anonymous figure in Gryffindor. Sure, she didn’t slide in thebackground completely, but she often felt like she was being lost in theshuffle.

Maybe that’s why shebecame so attracted to Ron. Despite being shoved to the sidelines constantly,Ron never stopped caring about the people he loved. When push came to shove, hewas the sweetest, bravest, kindest person Lavender had ever met.  

Of course, Lavender wasaware of the deal with Ron and Hermione. Parvati had warned her at the start ofsixth year; Hermione had been nursing a crush on Ron ever since the end ofthird year.

But -and this was whatmade Lavender especially angry- Hermione hadn’t done anything. She hadn’t evenbeen present when Ron had won the Quidditch Cup the previous year. Lavenderremembered overhearing Ron talking about it under a tree a few days after thematch; neither Harry nor Hermione had been there. They’d left.

Lavender had been thisclose from marching over to give them a piece of her mind, but Parvati hadpulled her away before her self-control broke. It infuriated her to see Rongetting ignored so often. Ron was always there to support his friends, but theynever seemed to give him the same treatment. He was always having to sacrificehis own achievements to focus on them.

When sixth year hadstarted, Lavender had finally decided enough was enough. She was going to showRon appreciation. Goodness knows, he needed it. The poor boy had always hadtrouble with nerves, but Lavender was damned if she wasn’t to make him feelbetter.

Like a good friend,Parvati had come round to the idea. After all -she said- it wasn’t as ifHermione had any claim to Ron. And the redhead could use someone in his corner(well, aside from Harry, anyway).

Lavender was pleasantlysurprised to find that Ron was very happy about her showing him appreciation.He’d even started strutting after she giggled at him. He’d always had a greatway of walking, but Lavender was especially taken with the new confident way hewas swinging his hips.

Ron Weasley cheerleadernumber one; that was Lavender.  

At then –finally-Lavender had kissed him. It had been after a match; Ron had walked into theCommon Room, and Lavender had flung her arms around him.

Sure, neither of themwere experienced at kissing, but that was okay; they were learning fromeach-other. He had so confident, he seemed to stand taller.

And Lavender was glad.She wasn’t just “the other Gryffindor girl” anymore; she was Ron Weasley’sgirlfriend.

Looking back, thenickname wasn’t the best idea. It was designed exclusively for Hermione’s ears,and Lavender had to admit that it was spiteful. But so was setting a flock ofbirds on someone!

Honestly, Lavenderdidn’t know if she could ever forgive Hermione for that. Sure, Hermione washurting, but it was her own fault. She’d spent three years crushing on Ron, andall she would have had to do was be more appreciative of him. But she hadn’t;for once, Hermione Granger wasn’t the smartest girl in the room. She hadignored Ron when he most needed it, and she was now paying the price.

Lavender knew it wasvindictive, but she couldn’t help herself.

As she continued todate Ron, she knew something was up. At first, they seemed to get along reallywell. Yes, they snogged, but they were teenagers, and it was so nice to finallyhave someone who wanted them.

Lavender didn’t reallyknow much about chess, but Ron did try to teach her. It was great to see him sopassionate about something, and so… confident about it. Ron was arguably moreconfident playing chess than he was doing almost anything else. Lavender wishedshe (and everyone) could see this side of him more.

She didn’t know whatpossessed her to get the necklace. That was a bad idea, and she’d immediatelyapologised to Ron after they returned to Hogwarts and got some time alone. Hehad been surprisingly mature about it, saying that he appreciated the thoughtbut it wasn’t really his style. He had been so sweet that Lavender had beentempted to climb onto his lap and snog him senseless.

But then Hermione hadentered the common room, and Ron’s attention had immediately been diverted.

Lavender tried tocontain the fear in her heart. No, no,no… this wasn’t the way it was supposed to go… Hermione had attacked him withbirds… why did he…why did he…

And the truth haddawned on Lavender.

She was not the girl Ronwas in love with. Because the girl Ron loved was the bushy-haired know-it-allwho refused to even acknowledge his existence at the time.

That was, until he waspoisoned.

Yes –as if to furtherunderline this whole nightmare- Ron had to almost die before Hermione would speak to him again. Suddenly, Hermionewas Ron’s friend again. But that didn’t mean that Lavender had forgiven her forthe way she had treated Ron.

Finally, things came toa head. Lavender had seen Ron and Hermione emerging from Ron’s dormitory. Itwas the final straw.

Hermione had hurriedlydashed off to the girls dormitories, leaving Ron to face Lavender’s wrath byhimself.

‘What more can she do,Lavender?’ Ron exclaimed, waving his arms around. ‘I’ve accepted her apology,and you should too!’

‘No, I will not!Despite what you may think, Ron, I’m not an idiot!’

‘What? I don’t thinkthat-’

‘Were you just using meto get back at Hermione? Is that the only reason you’ve been dating me?!’

There was a deafeningsilence. Ron’s eyes widened in shock, and his mouth dropped open.

‘Are you mental? Whatsort of prat do you take me for?’

‘Well, it certainlyseems that way to me!’

‘How? I never thoughtHermione was interested in me, so why would I use you to get back at her? I… Idid use you. But not for that. I just… wanted to get over Hermione. I was sickof feeling like I was never enough, no matter what I did. So… no… I wasn’tusing you to get back at her. I may be a prat, but I’m not that much of aprat!’

Lavender felt her mouthfall open. Get over Hermione? What? Howcould he not see?

‘She- she- she lovesyou, Ron! How could you have never noticed? And why didn’t you break up with meonce you realised just how jealous she was? Why…. Why…’

Lavender trailed off.

Ron was rubbing thescars on his hands. The scars from the wounds inflicted in Hermione’s birdattack.

Oh god…

Ron thought she wasgoing to attack him just like Hermione had done.

Lavender felt her eyesfill with tears.

‘Lavender…’ Ron said,his voice hitching slightly. ‘What… I’m sorry… please… please don’t cry…’

‘I’m not crying becauseof that!’ Lavender sobbed, tears streaming down her face. ‘Do you really thinkI would ever… would ever… attack you like that…?’

‘I’m… I’m sorry, Ron. Iwas using you, too. Not… not to get over anyone, but… to just proof that Iexisted.’

It was true. She wasn’tthe prettiest girl in the year like Parvati, nor was she was the smartest likeHermione. She was the only one in her dorm to not go to the Yule Ball with aTriwizard Champion. She was just… ordinary. Plain old Lavender.

Kinda ironic, givenshe’d ended up dating the one person who could understand that.

She and Ron were morealike than people thought. They were both side-lined, ignored, sick of gettingoverlooked. Trying to find comfort in each-other to block out a world thatdidn’t seem to pay them any attention.

Yes, their relationshiphadn’t been especially healthy, but it was also what they needed at the time.To be noticed, appreciated. To be someone-else’s first concern.

‘I’m sorry, Lavender.I… I’ve hurt you. You… you deserve someone who’ll treat you right.’

‘You deserve that too,Ron.’

The redhead scoffed.

‘Yeah, but who’s gonnabe interested in me?’

‘Hermione Granger. Youknow, the girl you’re in love with.’

Ron’s ears went red.

‘Lavender… I’m… I’m sosorry…’

‘Don’t you dareapologise, Ron!’ Lavender exclaimed, pointing her finger at him threateningly.‘You weren’t the best boyfriend ever, but you were still lovely! Why do youthink I fell for you in the first place?’

‘Er, because I was goodat Quidditch?’

Lavender sighed.

‘Ron, please stopthinking that people are only attracted to you because of things you achieve,rather than who you are. You are amazing anyway; you… you don’t need to proveyourself.’

‘I was going to say thesame thing to you.’

Lavender did adouble-take at that.

‘We’re quite alike,aren’t we?’

‘Yeah.’

The two shared a sadsmile, before Lavender wiped her eyes with her sleeve, turned softly on herheel, and walked up the girls’ dormitory stairs.

Lavender pushed openthe door to the sixth year dorm, to find Hermione sat awkwardly on her bed, asif she had just retreated quickly from listening at the door.

No doubt she had heardthe shouting.

Parvati was cautiouslywatching from the chair beside her own four-poster, her eyes flicking quicklybetween her two dorm-mates.

‘Me… me and Ron havebroken up.’

Parvati stood her, andrushed over, pulling Lavender into a comforting hug.

‘I’m sorry, Lav,’ shewhispered softly, patting her gently on the back. ‘You deserve better.’

Lavender shook herhead.

‘No. Both me and Rondeserve better.’

Pulling away, sheturned her head to look at the bushy-haired witch still sat on the bed.

Hermione flinched as Lavenderapproached. But Lavender felt no wrath towards her.

‘If you ever do so muchas set a single canary on Ron again,you’ll have me to answer to. Do you understand?’

Hermione’s mouth fellopen.

‘What?’ What are youimplying-?’

‘Because,’ Lavender said,her voice hitching. ‘While I might not have been the best girlfriend… I neverphysically attacked him. And I have a feeling that you don’t want to be a worsegirlfriend than me, do you?’

Hermione blinkedconfusedly at her, looking more and more flustered by the second. It was sounusual to see the usually-headstrong girl at such a loss for words. Or maybeLavender just hadn’t asked her the right questions in the past. Maybe theycould have avoided all this if she had.

‘But… Ron…’ Hermionestammered, dropping eye contact.  ‘He… hedoesn’t…’

Lavender rolled hereyes. Honestly, for the so-called “brightest witch of her age”, HermioneGranger could be extraordinarily thick about these things.

‘And people accuse Ron of being oblivious. At least he hasan excuse for it.’

Lavender pushed pastHermione, and climbed into her own bed, her eyes beginning to tear up again. Itwas her first real heartbreak after all, despite the sympathy she felt for Ron.

Parvati sat down nextto her, and Lavender leaned into the taller girl’s shoulder, her body shakingas her tears soaked Parvati’s pyjama top.

Hermione discreetlyleft the room, closing the door softly behind her. She would give Lavender abit of space for the rest of the evening, understanding that Lavender probablydidn’t want to see her at the minute.

As she walked into thecommon room, she found Ron, sat quietly in front of the fire, looking verymorose.

‘Er… Ron?’

The redhead turned, anda small smile appeared on his face. Hermione felt her heart give a sudden thud.

‘Hey.’

‘Are… are you okay?’

He shook his head.

‘Well, probably betterthan Lavender feels right now. We broke up.’

There was a slightpause.

‘Oh.’

‘Yeah.’

Not really knowing whatelse to do, Hermione sat down next to the redhead.

‘I was a pretty badboyfriend to her.’

Hermione shook herhead.

‘Maybe you weren’t thebest, but that’s understandable. And besides; you didn’t want to hurt herfeelings. That counts.’

‘I guess. I’ve been aright coward, though.’

Hermione looked down atthe scars on Ron’s hand.

‘No. I’ve known you fora long time, and if there is one thing you’re not; it’s a coward.’ Hermionesaid, patting Ron awkwardly on the shoulder. ‘I think you just made the wrongconclusion about how to go about these things. And it was your firstrelationship, after all.’

Ron shrugged.

‘I dunno. Maybe I’mjust rubbish at romance.’

‘You wouldn’t be theonly one.’

The two of them shareda shy smile. Maybe things weren’t completely back to normal between them, butthings were changing. And –after all- every ending was the beginning ofsomething else.

The two were soengrossed in the other, that they didn’t notice the pair of eyes watching themfrom the girls’ dormitory staircase.

Lavender Brown smiledsadly to herself, before walking back up the stairs.

You best treat him right, Hermione Granger; you besttreat Ron right…

 _______________________________________________________________

Thanks for reading, everyone! Hope you liked it! If so, please like and reblog, or leave comments/reviews/kudos on the FFN and AO3 pages for this fic. 

Thanks again to @allaboutromione for the request; hope you enjoyed it! 

[doctorgerth]

🎐1/3 Could I please request a male matchup for my OC? Name: Chii Ittoujii, Age: 23 after time skip (she’s a god and aged slower before she came down to the mortal realm so she’s actually much older). 170cm tall/long black hair/hime cut with blunt bangs/red eyes/very pale, almost white skin/very slender waist and long legs/large breasts/plump pink lips/slight fangs. Ethereal/otherworldly Beauty. She has a very quiet/calm/stoic personality, level headed, not extremely talkative, an introvert

Can be sadistic but with the sweetest smile. Has a dark sense of humor. Intelligent and educated. would destroy anyone who insults or threatens her friends and would die for them, prettiest smile and the nicest laugh. Can keep a straight face if she wants to in most situations unless she’s angry. Her swearing could put sailors to shame. Enjoys reading/sketching/painting/mapping the stars/growing plants/combining herbs for medicinal purposes. Loves cats and flowers. Suffers from insomnia. Can go days sometimes weeks without sleeping, 10000% not a morning person when she finally does get a few hours sleep. She has a 9 tailed fox spirit bonded with her body, melee fighter who specialises in punches and kicks, and fights sometimes with dual wielded chokuto. Can switch between attacks that specialise more on speed or attacks that focus on pure power. An Astronomer and a Princess. Can see and communicate with spirits and animals due to being a god.

This is my first time doing a matchup for an OC, so thank you! I’ll admit I was a bit overwhelmed with all this info lol so I got a secondary opinion (by my lovely friend @doflomingos-glasses u the best bb) I hope this turned out okay for you! Please enjoy xxx

Chii’s match is…

Sanji

First of all, Sanji deserves an absolute babe. Goddess or not, Sanji is going to treat Chii like the most perfect specimen in the entire galaxy. No love could ever compare to Sanji’s love for Chii. He deserves it, she deserves it. Going off appearances, we know Sanji isn’t hard to please, but having an ethereal, otherworldly beauty by his side? That’s something he adores like no other (if he doesn’t die from insane amounts of nose bleeds first). Forget the All Blue, Chii is all he needs in life. Hancock can’t even phase him now, he is utterly infatuated with Chii Ittoujii.

Now, though Sanji seems shallow on the outside, we know that is definitely not the case on the inside. Sanji is a natural born lover, caretaker, he has the kindest heart and aims to please. He would do whatever it takes to keep Chii happy and would obliterate anyone that dared to hurt her. He’s 100000% whipped for her! Sanji is a bit more extroverted, but he can woo his introverted woman with a nice dinner date, or cuddles and romantic music in his bedroom. Her introverted nature won’t stop him from showing her off to anyone and everyone however. But he also will kick anyone who looks at her the wrong way. He’s very protective of her, a little insecure at times, but is always reassured when she shows him affection. Then he’s back to feeling like the luckiest man on the planet.

Though he’s well aware she can hold her own, that doesn’t stop him from trying to protect her in every situation, most of the time causing himself to get hurt in the process. He just wants to keep her safe, but he’s also wowed by her crazy abilities. Most of the time, it’s her protecting him; Sanji will gladly play the damsel in distress for her lol Would try his damned hardest not to piss her off, and whips out popcorn when someone else does. He’s hoping one day Zoro will piss her off enough and she’ll destroy his ass.

He’s just completely infatuated by her every move, everything about her. Her fighting skills? Stunning. Her sweet smile? Breathtaking. Her cute little laugh? Adorable. Her sailor mouth? Exquisite. Everything she does is captivating to him and he’s not shy to show it. If she’s a little shy towards his praises, he tries his hardest to control himself when around her, but he feels on the verge of explosion from keeping everything in! He just wants love and dote on her all day, treating her like the goddess she is literally and figuratively.

Sanji adores how she shares common interests with the rest of the crew - reading with Robin, sketching with Franky, mapping with Nami, planting flowers with Usopp, herbal medicine with Chopper, training with Zoro….ok he actually hates that but you get the idea. Even though she’s a freaking goddess, she fits in among the crew easily and it’s important to him that his family loves his woman (just not as much, that’s not allowed).

He hates going to bed without her, so he tries to cook/prepare some foods to help her sleep. Chii has gained more sleep than she ever has in entire life all thanks to Sanji. She still doesn’t sleep all through the night, and he knows this, so he tries to keep the bed cozy for her when she gets back. He’s well aware that she’s not a morning person (learned that the hard way) so he won’t even try to wake her up in the morning unless it’s an emergency. Instead, he’ll sneakily slide out, go fix her some breakfast, lay it on the bedside table, and kiss her forehead before going to make breakfast for the rest of the crew. She naturally wakes up on her own to the smell of food and even though Sanji isn’t right there by her, his consideration for her sleep makes the mornings just so much better.

All in all, I believe Chii deserves someone who treats her like a goddess, but loves her for more than that. Sanji’s love for her would be genuine, a lil pervy, but most of all it comes from the bottom of his heart. He would sacrifice anything for her, and he chooses to love her and only her every single day. I think they deserve each other!

Other potential suitors:

Hawkins - They both share that ethereal-y vibe and I just think they would look cute together. They’re both level-headed and introverted so it’s easy to enjoy each other’s company. He’s also not one to care if she’s a goddess or not, nor if she’s stronger and older than him. If he falls for someone, then that’s just it. He does adore her beauty, don’t get me wrong, but her loyal and mild nature is what really gets him. He is also blown away by her skills. Being able to talk to spirits and animals is one of the coolest things to him. He’s never unimpressed with Chii, she makes life and love very interesting for him.

Shanks - Another babe that just deserves a goddess? He would take such good care of Chii and yeah, he’s a lil pervy like Sanji with her, but it’s a lil classier than Sanji lol He definitely shows her off all the time, but what matters most is the way he respects her and cares for her well being. She’s probably stronger than him, but he still fights for her always. The thing about him is he hardly treats her like a goddess. She’s just the love of his life. Even if she weren’t a goddess, he’d treat her just the same.

Zoro - This is more of a crackship one because he would be the dumbass that ends up with a goddess and is just like “yeah whatever” about it! He doesn’t care to show her off because he knows that other people are going to fall for her, and what’s Zoro’s is Zoro’s. No looking, no touching. He also loves her for deeper than her outward appearance. Her fighting skills are insane and they have much to bond over. But hey, he definitely thinks she’s pretty hot too.

[yorhaemployee]

all of the cottagecore asks! 🌸

1. 🍁 - favourite season and why?

spring! everything comes to life again, the temperature is just right, nature is at its prettiest and so on. most precious time of the year

2. 💐 - which do you prefer, flowers or trees?

i’ve never really thought about it but trees i think? i love both but trees just hit home

3. 🌾 - did you pick up any hobbies because of the cottagecore community? which?

an interest in growing my own veggies (there’s already a big garden in the new house we’re moving into in 20 days (!!!)), a new found love for taking walks, cooking more home made food etc. not entirely thanks to cottagecore but it made it feel more meaningful

4. 🥧 - what’s one thing you genuinely, truly love?

dogs

5. 🍞 - cooking or baking?

cooking! i’m not that good at baking nor do i like baked goods that much. cooking is a much wider field and i come from a family of cooks so it feels natural

6. 🌟 - what’s one memory you will always look back to fondly?

my graduation will always be the default answer for this one. or pretty much any day from my ireland trip

7. 🕯 - do you like the night? why/why not?

not that much. i’m a morning person so it’s the best of both worlds (day and night) - it’s light outside but still very quiet and i can think clearly

8. 🍒 - patterned or plain clothes?

i think most of my clothes are plain but in some kind of pretty color, but i’d like to wear more patterns

9. 🎻 - choose three songs, one each to represent your past, your present, and your hope for the future. why did you pick them?

in order; helplessness blues - fleet foxes, silver city days - rachel zeffira and bluebird - miranda lambert. the lyrics sum it up in general but the vibes as well

10. 💫 - what’s one thing you wish you could tell your past self?

that it’s actually gonna be ok one day and you just have to be patient and kind to yourself while waiting

11. 🌿 - forest, mountains, or fields?

forest

12. 🍂 - which song do you feel best suits the cottagecore community?

honestly any fleet foxes songs.. yes i’m a huge fan stfu!! but they really do fit

13. 🍄 - what’s the kindest thing anyone’s ever said to you? Has it influenced you in any way?

this sounds so melodramatic but i actually can’t remember.. like i really don’t want to sound like i pity myself BUT i really don’t get a lot of compliments or kind words from anyone and i can’t remember the last time someone told me something that really stuck with me. maybe a lot of things my teacher said when i was in 9th grade.. he really made me believe in myself

14. 🧶 - how does your favourite song make you feel?

my current favorite song is futile devices (doveman remix) - sufjan stevens, it was in call me by your name and i still haven’t let that movie go.. it reminds me both of the film but also of a person i no longer speak to but that was very precious to me. and just unrequited love/feelings in general, longing, etc

15. 🥐 - what colour do you think most represents you?

lilac i think.. i asked my boyfriend and he said the same thing lol. lilac or green, maybe because practically everything i like/buy/make is lilac, purple or green :-)

16. 🍯 - what’s one food that will always remind you of home?

cabbage soup or jambalaya. my dad always made it for me growing up and i love him so much for everything he’s done for me. he made me jambalaya last year when i was feeling bad about some things and i almost sobbed because i felt little again. he has a hard time expressing feelings just like i do so he does it through cooking instead

17. 🌰 - knitting or crochet?

crochet!! i used to crochet so much as a child, i never learnt how to knit but i prefer crocheting anyways

18. 🧵 - what’s one thing you’re looking forward to at the moment?

moving from this dumb apartment into a big house

19. 🍑 - sweet or savoury foods?

savoury!! always

20. 🍀 - what’s one thing you wish people knew about you?

1. i really really wish i had friends but like. i never click with anyone and i have a hard time opening up.. i’m very friendly however and if we’re mutuals i’m more than willing to dm or something but i can seem super rigid at first sowwy

2. i have crohn’s disease and it affects my life so much but i never write or talk about it anywhere!! idk if it annoys people but sometimes i wish more people were aware of how it affects me and others that have it, practically 80% of my day/night is affected by it in some way

[hookahazz]

Chronicles of a Black Girl Vol 2: It’s New York Baby |Harry Styles|

Warnings: Cursing, fluff (this was ji cute)

Word Count: 4.1k

A/N: Here’s part two, I finally finished. It’s so long. I took a different approach this time, this one was just like a story I had in my head and I wanted the reader to be black. I hope you guys enjoy it. I finished editing this at 2 in the morning so please, please, please give me feedback tell me how you feel about it (love it, hate it, like it, dislike it) if you see any spelling errors let me know. Also, I tried to write Harrys dialogue the way he actually talks IRL so for my advanced writers who do that tell me if I did it right, please. This volume will probably have little blurbs in the future. 

ASK BOX 

Harry’s lost, very fucking lost. He’s stuck somewhere in the middle of New York of all places, and of course, he hasn’t a clue as to where he is nor does he know how to get anywhere. It was spur of the moment and Harry nearly regrets saying yes to Niall crazy proposition. He had called him hours before their plane departed, asking if he wanted to go to New York and Harry really couldn't decline (he couldn’t find it in his heart to, not with Niall on the other end of the line crying because he wasn’t able to return the tickets nor was he able to get a refund on the hotel he booked for the romantic getaway he planned for his girlfriend who of course broke up with him over text just before).

“Bloody fuck,” he yelled on the corner of an unknown street.

Harry was alone now because his idiotic best mate hadn’t been paying attention and hopped on a train without him.

“I swore you were right behind me, mate!” Niall had professed over the phone.

“I wasn’t Niall! You were ways in front of me, damn it!”

“Okay, okay. Let’s just calm down alright? All you need to do is get on a train headed s-”

Of course, only Harrys phone would die while he’s stuck in the middle of nowhere in a city he’s never been in while he’s without a charger.

“No, no, no! Fucking hell!” he screamed, pulling at his curls. He plopped himself on a bench and hung his head on the verge of tears. Harry was not a cryer, but with the stress of not knowing where he was and this anger he had begun storing toward Niall and his bitchy ex-girlfriend, crying seemed like the only logical thing to do.

“Yo, what’s the matter whichu, kid? Why you spazzin’?“

Without even looking up, Harry let it all out without a moment's hesitation, in dire need of a source to vent to not caring who or what it was.

“Well for one, M’lost for christ sake. Don’t have a bloody fucking clue as to where I am! My phones dead, my best mate jumped on a train without me, M’fucking hungry and it’s s’bloody fucking cold out here! Why’s it s’fucking cold?!” he concluded, out of breath from his confession.

“You’s a funny one,” the girl, he had concluded immediately, giggled causing Harry to look up.

“I’m (Y/N), what’s your name curly Q?”

“M’Harry,” he grinned, now admiring just how beautiful she was.

(Y/N) had a dark, rich, creamy complexion that Harry couldn’t stop gawking at; it reminded him of expensive chocolate he had once tasted while visiting Ecuador (a high school trip he submitted his payment for at the minute because his mom had been pestering him about how he never does anything fun and that he’d regret it later). She had long, dark brown and blonde braids that fell past her back and stopped at her bum that Harry yearned to play  She also had the prettiest eyes Harry had ever seen, they were a chocolate brown that seemed to be glowing due to the streetlights they had sat under. And to Harry, even though she had only spoken only a couple of sentences to him and laughed at his series of unfortunate events, he thought her voice was like velvet (she had a thick New York accent he thought was just the cutest). He could listen to her talk all day and he’d never complain. Harry loved everything about this girl and he knew nothing of her. He just thought she was really, really, really fucking beautiful.

“Odd name for an odd kid but still cute,” she smiled.

“Hey... M’not a kid. M’a grown man,” he whined only making (Y/N) laugh.

“Yeah sure,” she waved him off with yet another smile (Harry had come to really adore it by now) before zipping her jacket up and putting her hood over her head.

“It’s brick out here,” she shivered.

“Brick? What are you going on about, love?” he questioned, tilting his head like a curious cat (Harry wasn’t one for using slang).

“Just means cold babe, na mean?”  

His heart warmed at the use of “babe”. He knew deep down she didn’t mean anything by it but god, he loved to hear the word roll off her tongue (it was rather pleasing to him).

“N-na mean? I don't f-”

“It’s finna rain, sweets,” she hummed looking up at the sky.

Harry groaned in frustration and annoyance (not at (Y/N) of course), mumbling some curse words under his breath and tugging at his hair trying to figure out what the hell he was going to do.

“Erm, are there any shelters, perhaps, nearby I can go to? J-just until I can figure out what to do?” He questioned nervously,

God, he was so embarrassed. Harry was sure, absolutely sure, that (Y/N) had thought he was the biggest loser in the world right now. If his face wasn’t so red and bitten by the cold, she could actually see how embarrassed he was.

Unfortunately for Harry, there were none within walking distance. By now, all of the local shops were closed and everyone was pretty much inside, sleeping by now, resting ready for whatever tomorrow holds. Now (Y/N) wasn’t heartless, she wasn’t just about to leave the curly haired boy out in the cold to freeze. In fact, she was probably one of the kindest girls New York had to offer but that doesn’t mean she couldn't “fuck a bitch up”, she would proclaim, if need be. She did feel bad for the cute boy though. He didn’t seem suspicious or dangerous in fact quite the opposite. She thought he looked rather cute, his nose and ears red from the cold, his curly hair poking from his bandana he had wrapped around his head. He resembled a real teddy bear in her eyes.

“You can stay at mines for tonight,” she blurted without a second thought.

Silence fell between them making her almost regret her offer.

“Only if you want, duh. Of course, you don’t have to Its just real cold out here and I just don’t feel comfortable leaving you out here alone all night, it’s mad dangerous at night.”

“Y-You sure, love? Really don’t want to impose. S’bad enough you're wasting your time sitting out in the cold with me,” he smiled, warming her heart.

“Oh, you’re buggin’ kid. It’s really no problem at all. Can’t have you freezing your balls off in the cold now can we, Harry?” She smirked. She quite liked the way his name rolled off her tongue. She liked his name too. (Y/N)’s never ever met a ‘Harry’ before.  

↫ ↬

“It’s kinda small but I’ll make it comfortable for you,” she mumbled, sticking and twisting the key into the lock, opening the door to her apartment.

Harry really adored (Y/N), he really did think she was quite lovely. He was so grateful for her; he’s never met someone so kind and trusting.

“Damn it. It’s brick in here too?! Fuck is going on with the heat?” she exclaimed rushing to the heater as soon as she managed to get the door open.

Harry just stood there, awkwardly at that, by the door, really unsure of what do. He didn’t want to be rude and just sit so formally. He just twirled a curl around his finger until she came back. He was extremely nervous and the last thing he wanted to do was seem like a weirdo or make her uncomfortable in any way. Harry thought he’d actually die from embarrassment if he did anything stupid in front of (Y/N).

“Hey, sit down get comfortable, relax, Harry. I’ll get you some warm clothes and I’ll wash your old ones,” she yelled from down the hall.

Harry sat down on her rather comfortable couch, he was almost excited to sleep on her couch. His body really is not meant to sleep on couches, it gives him a lot of back pains (Niall has had an earful of Harry's complaints in the past) but Harry didn’t care tonight, he had such a long day and he’s just grateful that he gets to sleep in a warm apartment rather than a cold park bench or some moldy motel.

“Here babe,” her smooth voice interrupted his thoughts.

“Thanks s’much, love. I really appreciate it,” Harry smiled, gently taking the plaid blue pants and a plain black T-shirt from her hands (they were decorated with two silver rings, one on her pinky and ring finger. Harry thought that was quite cute given that he also wore silver rings).

“Oh please, it’s not a big deal. I couldn't just leave you out there, babe,” (Y/N) poked the dimple indented in his cheek and giggled. She really adored his smile as he did hers, there's just something about those dimples that just made (Y/N)’s knees weak.

↫ ↬

“Oh, will you shut the fuck up about that! I was 8! I’m not telling you shit about my childhood ever again, Styles!”

(Y/N) and Harry had soon learned that they weren’t going to get any sleep, not with the constant noise of police sirens going off; it was about 12, maybe 1 in the morning? Neither of them knew, both of them too caught up in a game of spades (in which (Y/N) had to repeatedly remind Harry of the rules) and the two boxes of pizza (Y/N) ordered (even though Harry had begged her to let him pay, she insisted saying he was the guest), to even think about sleep

(Y/N) was born and raised in New York, The Bronx specifically. It was dangerous as hell to be living out there sometimes but man, did she love that borough nonetheless. She knew just about everyone in South Bronx, most of them were like family to her. The Bronx was her home and it was also the last place anyone would want to tour when they came to New York, so for the life of her, she really couldn't figure out how this six feet, teddy bear looking dude stumbled into one of the most dangerous boroughs in the state.

“Okay okay (Y/N) I guess I’ll let it slide,” Harry bit his lip, trying to contain his laughter (she had just told him about the time one of her big brothers scared her so bad she pissed herself and Harry couldn’t stop laughing).

“Now here’s an important question that’ll really decide if I actually like you or not,” she rolled her eyes.

“Yeah okay shoot, curly Q,” she grinned, laying a seven of hearts on the stack.

“Do you drink your tea with milk or no?”

She immediately crinkled her nose in disgust.

“Fuck is you talk bout Styles? I don’t drink no wack ass tea” she giggled.

“Fuck is- are you talking about (Y/L/N),” he tried to copy her but failed miserably as it sounded absolutely ridiculous coming out of his mouth.

“Aww, been in New York for only a day and you’re already talking like me, cute!”

“Oi, shut up!” he stuck his tongue out, pouting, only making (Y/N) laugh harder.

“You’ve been laughing at me ever since I told you I was lost, you’re s’mean.”

“Nobody’s mean, you’re just too sensitive, baby,” she smirked.

Harry was quite embarrassed. (Y/N) had been calling him pet names (lover, sweets, sweetie, etc) ever since they had walked into her apartment and each time Harry’s stomach fluttered and he blushed (luckily for Harry, (Y/N) was oblivious to things as such).

↫ ↬

“That show was shit love,” he snorted.

“Shut up you just don’t understand it,”

Somehow, someway (Y/N) had talked Harry into watching an episode of Black Ink Crew: New York (a crazy reality tv show (Y/N) had been invested in since the first episode aired) after they had finished their game of spades (Harry was and still is confused about the rules and lost horribly).

“There was just a lot of drama. I couldn't keep up with all of it!” Harry groaned, resting his head on her shoulder taking one of her braids into his fingers and twirling around his long digits it as he imagined doing so when he first laid eyes on her.

“That’s why it’s good, babe! I’d rather watch someone else’s drama then have some in my own life,” she yawned.

“You’re tired, button?” Harry questioned, beginning to feel bad for keeping her up so late into the night.

“Just a bit, doesn’t matter, I’m sleeping out here anyway. I got the bedroom ready for you so just go in there when you’re ready to go to bed.”

“You- love, you’re not sleeping on the couch and M’not sleeping in your bed (Y/N),” he argued.

“Go get in the bed Harry, you just too tall to sleep on my couch,” she smiled, laying on the couch and wrapping the blanket around her small figure.

Harry just stared at her as she began to fall asleep. He was completely infatuated with this girl and he hadn’t even known her for a full 24 hours. No one in his entire life had been so nice and inviting to him. He hadn’t ever met someone who he wanted to be around all of the time, who he needed to be around all of the time. He couldn't understand why, even if she only meant it in a playful way, her calling him babe made his stomach flutter and made his cheeks rosy red. Harry couldn’t understand any of it and it annoyed the hell out of him, he ended up falling asleep on the couch along with her.

↫ ↬

“Jesus Niall I don’t know and I don’t really want to wake her up, she looks s’peaceful sleeping,” Harry whispered into the line while leaning on her kitchen counter.

“C’mon, you’re gonna to have to wake her up soon. Haven’t a fucking clue as to where you are mate! Got the whole day planned before we leave tomorrow,” Niall whined into the phone making Harry roll his eyes.

Harry really was in no rush to leave (Y/N) just yet. Quite honestly, he was so upset when she fell asleep he just stared at her and played with her braids and listened to her mumble every couple of minutes to pass the time because he didn’t want to waste his last couple of hours with her sleeping.

Harry was so engrossed in his phone he didn’t even realize she had woken up nor did he feel her arms wrap around his body until she mumbled a “good morning”.

“Oh good morning, pet. Didn’t even know you were awake yet,” he smiled turning to her.

“M’hungry,” she mumbled again, pressing her cheek to his shirt.

Harry’s heart sped up and his face began heating up (it annoyed Harry how much of an effect (Y/N) had on him).  He took this as an opportunity to play with her hair again, he was really in love with her braids. Harry just thought (Y/N) looked so damn pretty with them he really couldn’t help himself. She really was the most beautiful girl he had ever seen, that would explain why Harry creepily watched her sleep (but he’d never tell a soul, not even Niall, that he did that to a woman he’d just met).

“I’m sorry, I’m like all up in yo personal space.”

“(Y/N) s’fine, really.”

“We can go to the city if you want. We could get some brekkie at a nice restaurant,” he offered, forgetting all about Niall’s plans for the day.

She just nodded and smiled.

“You can take a shower first, it’s gone take me a minute to figure out what I wanna wear today,” she grinned.

(Y/N) was so excited, not only because she was going to get some food in the city but because she was going to be able to spend the morning and hopefully, the afternoon with him. She wanted to show him around, take some memorable pictures, and hear some more crazy childhood stories with him, Gemma, and Anne. She just wanted to be around him as much as he wanted to be around her; they craved one another in every way.

↫ ↬

“(Y/N), I swear on everything if you take another bite of my fucking pancakes, I’m gonna f-”

“You ain’t gone do shit, Styles cause you ain't about shit,” (Y/N) was nearly in tears because of how hard she was laughing. They’d been cracking jokes from the moment they’d left (Y/N)’s apartment, to the train ride, to the bus, and now in the restaurant.

Being in New York really brought something out of Harry, a new attitude and a new perspective. Being with (Y/N) made him more observant (given that he’d almost gotten run over by a taxi while he was crossing the road before the sign said walk). He enjoyed being in the city. Even with it being his first time there, it felt like home and Harry can’t decide if it’s (Y/N) or if it’s just the vibes the city held that made him feel such.

“You’re quite annoying, y’know that (Y/N)?” she rolled her eyes and stuck her fork into Harry's pancakes again.

“Shut yo goofy ass up, you know you love it.”

Harry just looked down and grinned, he did love it but he just didn’t want to admit that to himself just yet. This moment with her was perfect. He lifted his head, his eyes met with (Y/N) typing on her phone and god, did she look beautiful. Maybe it was the sun bouncing off of her chocolate skin, or the way her braids were styled, or maybe it was just the contrast of her skin and her red shirt that made it just impossible for Harry to stop staring at her.

(Y/N) lifted her head from her phone and smiled fondly at him.

“You’re staring again, goofy.”

“S-sorry you just look...” he paused

“I look...?” she smirked.

“Beau-”

“Harry, mate is that you?! God, I’ve been looking everywhere for you!” Niall interrupted them.

Harry nearly choked, turning to meet his Irish lad.

“Nearly turned the city upside down searching for y- Oh? Who might this be eh?”

“I’m (Y/N), you must be Niall, Harry’s told me all about you.” she smiled, introducing herself to the enthusiastic blonde boy.

“So sorry you had to deal with Harry here, I know he must’ve been a pain in the ass.”

“Oh yeah, definitely the worst,” she teased.

“Oi, M’right here,” Harry whined, pouting like a baby.

“Oh gosh, didn’t even see you there mate.”

(Y/N) and Niall began laughing making Harry a tad annoyed and a bit jealous of how well they were already getting along (which he knew they would, both of them have similar goofy personalities, however, it still annoyed him).

“Niall sit down, have you eaten anything? You can get whatever you want, it’s on me,” (Y/N) offered.

Niall sat down next to Harry and began conversing with (Y/N), asking her about her life, how old she was simple casual topics. Once the two of them got to talking there was no stopping them. (Y/N) thought Niall was so adorable she had made it a point to constantly call him cute throughout their entire conversation, and Harry didn’t like that at all. They were cracking jokes, telling childhood stories, talking as though they’d known each other for years and that just didn’t sit well with Harry. He didn’t want her to become close with Niall, he only wanted her from himself. Yes, it was selfish but Harry really didn’t give a damn, (Y/N) was his even though she wasn’t.

“Niall,” he interrupted the both of them

“What are you doing here?” he pressed.

“Hm?” Niall’s gaze lingering on (Y/N) to long for Harry's comfort.

“Oh yeah! I’ve been calling you all bloody morning so I could come to get you! I told you I had plans for us today and you didn’t answer mate!”

Harry had been ignoring Niall calls since him and (Y/N) boarded the train on purpose. He didn’t want to leave (Y/N) even though he knew he was going to part ways with her soon.

“Harry, why you ain't tell me you had made plans with Niall? I could've gotten you back to him sooner babe,"

"Yeah lad, been blowing up your line all morning! Could've sent a text or something," Niall chimed in, making Harry roll his eyes.

Harry was so damn annoyed with him. Why couldn't Niall come at a different time when Harry wasn't in the middle of telling her how beautiful he thought she was? Why couldn't Niall come at a time when they weren't at breakfast? Why’d Niall have to come now and take all the attention from him? Why couldn't Niall come at any other time than this? Harry knew he was going to have to reunite with him at some point, he knew he going to have to leave (Y/N) and go home which is why he just wanted to enjoy his last few hours with her alone.

“I... I just wanted to eat before I came back with you Nialler,” he lied.

“Well hurry up and finish what’s left on your plate. Gotta catch a tour at 11! S’ten twenty now, and we’ve still gotta take a bus to get there,” Niall instructed.

Harry looked up and locked eyes with (Y/N) who gave him a small faux smile.

“You guys should probably get going. I don’t think cute pie here would be too happy if you missed your tour.”

“Thank you! Someone who understands, now let’s get going H,” Niall grabbed his arm, ready to get going to the very expensive tour of NYC he paid a generous amount for (Niall wasn’t too keen on wasting money so he wasn’t about to let Harry blow through seventy-five dollars so easy).

↫ ↬

“Can I at least walk you to the train station?”

“You’ll be late for you tour babe, Niall really wants to go,” she smiled sympathetically.

Harry really really really didn’t want to fucking leave. His stomach sank and his mouth became incredibly dry. He'd known her for less than twenty-four hours and he was nearly about to lose it

“Well (Y/N), it was really nice meeting you. Again, m’sorry you had to go through the pain of sleeping in the same flat as Harry here,” Niall joked, earning a small laugh from (Y/N).

“Ah, you’re buggin’ it was really no problem. It was nice meeting you too cute pie,” (Y/N) smiled, pinching Niall’s cheeks before giving him a short friendly hug.

Harry frowned when it was his turn, the moment he had been dreading since she sat down on the park bench with him last night was finally happening.

“Don’t make that face babe. We’ll see each other again, you’ve got my number so you’d better use it or else I’ll be tight, m’kay kid?”

He sighed deeply and mumbled, “Okay”.

She pulled him into a bear hug, both of them wrapping their arms around one another not wanting to let go. Harry took one of (Y/N)’s braids and twirled it around his finger again for what seemed like the last time. He inhaled her vanilla perfume, desperately to remember small details about this girl before he left.

“This isn’t goodbye goodbye. Just... Goodbye for now, okay?” she tried to cheer him up, seeing how upset he was.

“Next time you bored and in need of somebody to talk to, or if you ever end up in The Bronx again just call me,” she grinned (Harry really adored her smile, it was one of the main features he was going to miss about her).

They unwrapped their arms around one another.

“C’mon Harry, we’ve gotta go!”

“Bye (Y/N),” the words tasting bitter coming from his mouth

“Bye babe, I’ll see you when I see you,” (Y/N) flashed him one last smile before turning and walking to the train station, Harry turning and walking to Niall.

Harry had a shitty start to his mini vacation that was totally unplanned but he’d, without a doubt go through it a million more times if it meant he got to see her again. (Y/N) was special and Harry would soon understand why his stomach fluttered every time she called him babe, why he was so entranced while playing with her braids, and why that his next trip to New York would be more memorable than the last.