#i still have so much stuff to learn ofc but like the more i know about sw the more i am like 'what did they do to u' w any character lol

[toastsnaffler]

weekend melancholy is starting to kick in >~<

[lukedjarinsblog]

sometimes I'm like the star wars franchise is great but I wish they would actually understand how luke skywalker is like they don't get him like I do I don't care if they made him me and him have a deeply, understanding connection

[zeawesomebirdie]

Not me realising that due to my fatigue I'm probably going to have to pay for private classes, at least to start with, since there's no way in hell I'll be capable of keeping up with a regular class,,,

[taketheringtolohac]

incompetent fool! that’s me 😌

[f1goat]

more than friends + lando norris x part four

In which your best friend wants to help you so you get more sexual experience, but he discovers quickly that he never wants to share you and your new sexual experience with others.

masterlist - playlist

warnings: smut with a plot or a plot with smut? :) minors dni! i never proofread so probably grammar or spelling errors

requested: yes, based on: something with a driver sister that’s still a virgin & lando (her bestfriend) suggests to teach her things (ofc pretending for it to bot mean anything), while he’s actually in love with her

part one / part two / part three

“Lan,” you start you sentence a bit shy, “when uh, when are we going to have sex?” You continue to ask. You feel your cheeks reddening while asking him the question. Lando looks confused at your sudden question. 

“What’s with the hurry?” He asks you a bit confused.

You let out a nervous laugh. “This is going to sound stupid,” you say nervous, “but there’s this guy who asked me on a date.”

“So?” Lando asks. He already feels jealousy coming up. Someone asked you onto a date? He wonders who asked you. Fuck. 

“I uh, I wanted to wait with the date for when I’m not a virgin anymore,” you confess, “I think it’s uh, it’s better for my confidence.” Is it bad that you don’t tell Lando that you want him, specifically him, to take your virginity? 

“How long can you stall him?” Lando asks you, “because I don’t think it’s a good idea to rush this.”

“Uh now I already told him I would go away with you for the triple header,” you explain, “so at least three weeks.”

Lando feels a bit more relieved now. In three weeks a lot can change right? Maybe he will finally find the confidence to tell you about his crush. Maybe not. Since he has a crush on you for multiple years and all those years weren’t enough to gather the confidence to tell you… 

“That’ll work,” Lando eventually says. 

“So what’s next?” You ask Lando, “I feel like there’s so much you still have to teach me.”

“Relax babygirl,” Lando says, “I think we need to focus on how I’m going to pack my suitcase with stuff for three weeks in an hour..”

“You didn’t pack yet?” You ask Lando confused, “We’re leaving in an hour!”

“Oops?” Lando laughs.

You let out a soft sigh. “You never change,” you tell Lando eventually with a small smile. Then you stand up to help Lando pack his stuff. As you almost always do. It doesn’t take the two of you long. Like a couple times earlier, you secretly put some shirts into Lando his luggage. The boy is way too stubborn to pack something else then hoodies, but he never checks the weather. Something you of course already did while packing your own stuff, so you know for sure he needs some normal shirts.

“Thanks babygirl,” Lando says after he closes the zippers. He moves closer to you and presses a kiss against your forehead. You don’t know what has gotten into you, but without giving it a second thought you press a kiss onto Lando his lips. Lando smiles during the kiss. He pulls you closer to himself and wraps his arms around your body. The kiss was meant as a simple, innocent one. But Lando is quick to make it turn into a make out session. His hands are roaming over your body. Quickly he finds your ass. Softly he squeezes it a couple times. You let out a soft moan while your lips are still pressed on Lando’s. 

Lando his ringtone distracts the both of you from what you were doing. You watch him pick up and say a simple ‘okay’ after a couple seconds. “The driver is here,” he informs you, you show him a small nod. He grabs his luggage and takes a couple of your backs with him as well. 

“You know,” Lando tells you, “you’re a great kisser.” In the mean time the two of you walk towards the driver who’s there to bring you to the airport. 

“I learned from the best,” you tell Lando with a small innocent smile.

Lando lets out a soft laugh. “Imagine how great you will be on all the other things with such a good teacher,” he tells you with the same laugh. 

“We will see,” you reply.

+++

Lando sighs when he sits down in his drivers room. You don’t know what to say. He just lost a great lap time due to track limits. He would be placed second tomorrow if he didn’t lose his time. You know he’s probably mad at himself right now. Lando mutters softly. You can’t hear him properly, but you guess he’s calling himself an idiot. It hurts you to see him like this. You have been here for all his highs in formula one, but also for all of his lows. You have seen him this upset with himself many times before. It never hurts less. 

“Lan,” you softly say. He doesn’t even look at you while responding, “Don’t say it isn’t my fault, I’m the one who got track limits,” he states. 

“Maybe I can cheer you up?” You eventually suggest.

“Cheer me up?” Lando asks you confused.

“Distract you a bit,” you continue.

“How babygirl?” Lando asks you even more confused.

“What about another lesson?” You ask Lando, “You could teach me how to give you a blowjob.”

“But I didn’t even went down on you,” Lando quickly brings in, “you don’t have to do this.”

“What if I want to? You look like you can use something that cheers you up,” you state. 

“Sure?” Lando asks you. You show him a nod. “Words,” Lando states, reminding you about his need for you to say everything. “Yes Lando,” you say, “I want to give you a blowjob.” Lando’s facial expression is quick to bright up. He’s already smiling about the idea of your lips around his dick. It even causes him to get a boner.

“But you need to tell me what to do,” you tell Lando a bit nervous. Lando is quick to nod, he grabs one of your hands and moves it slowly to his boner. You don’t wait for a new instruction, slowly you palm his already hard bulge through his race suit. Lando stays silent for a bit, he enjoys your movements in peace. You apply a bit more pressure while palming him. In the mean time you press a kiss against Lando his neck. 

After a few minutes of moving slowly on his bulge, you try to grab his dick through his race suit. Lando groans when you take him inside your hand. He pulls down the zipper of his race suit. While he unzips his suit, you take a good look at him. It feels almost unfair how hot he is. His fireproof is doing all kind of things to you. 

“Can I take it off?” Lando asks you. “Yes,” you reply quickly. You move your hands away from him, giving him the space to pull of his race suit. Lando grins. He kicks off his shoes and then pulls off the suit to step out of it. You keep looking at him. It feels so bare to see him in only his briefs, but then you remind yourself that he will remove those too in a bit.

Before Lando can pull his briefs off himself, you move your lips to his chest. You press multiple kisses against it, slowly moving down towards his dick. In the mean time you hold his boner in your hand, slowly stroking it. When you reach the edge of his boxers, you stop stroking his member. Slowly you pull his briefs a bit down. His hard member is quick to pop out of his briefs. Lando continues your movements and takes off his boxer. 

You take your time to look at his dick. You have seen some porn movies before, so you already had an imagine from how it would look. But in a weird way, it seems more appealing to you now. Lando his member is pretty. You never thought you would think that about a dick. He watches you while you stare at his member. You notice the thick vein that is laying onto his dick, now that you think about it. His whole member seems thick. Maybe not as long as those in the porn movies, but you already guessed that those were a bit fake. You wonder how this will ever fit inside of your mouth and one day inside of your vagina. 

“If you’re not sure, you don’t have to do this,” Lando softly tells you. 

“No,” you quickly state, “I want to do this. Just tell me what to do.”

Lando grins happily. He’s glad you still want to blow him. He isn’t sure if a cold shower would have helped this time. In the mean time you move your hands onto his dick again. Lando feels himself hardening even more. Has he ever been this hard? You explore his dick slowly with your hands. You trace the thick vein on top of it with one of your fingers while waiting for Lando to say something. 

“You uh, you can lick it a bit if you want?” Lando asks you, “Make it a bit wet.”

You are quick to take his words into action. Without giving it a second thought, you move your head closer to his member. Carefully you place your tongue onto it, even more careful you give him a couple licks. Lando lets out a soft moan. You continue your movements. You let your tongue slide over his dick. Exploring the way it feels on your tongue. 

“Put it in your mouth,” Lando says after a while.

You do what he says. With a careful movement you take the top of his dick inside your mouth. You try to go as deep as you can, but you’re quick to feel some tears popping up in the corners of your eyes.

“Slowly babygirl,” Lando says, “you don’t have to take everything inside. The top is the most sensitive part.”

You remove your mouth shortly to take a deep breath. When you place his dick back into your mouth, you try to remember his words. You make sure the top of his boner is inside your mouth, there’s room for a bit more but you act carefully. You remind yourself to take your time. Slowly you lick around his tip with your tongue. It earns you another moan from Lando. Something that makes you feel good on the inside. Giddy even. 

“Move your head a bit down and up,” Lando instructs you, “Try to make the same stroking movements from before, but now with your mouth.”

Again you take Lando his words into action. Slowly you move your head up and down. You let your mouth slide over his dick a couple times. Lando moans again. You feel proud that you are the reason of those moans. Without thinking about it, you take the part of his member that isn’t in your mouth into your hand. You start to stroke it, alining the movements with the bobbing you do with your mouth. 

“Fuck,” Lando groans, “You’re good at this.”

His words make you feel even better. It causes you to fasten your movements. You try to lick his tip as well in the mean time. Lando is quick to start to become a moaning mess underneath your touch. You feel his dick pulse in your mouth. 

“If you don’t want a taste, you should finish with your hands,” Lando grunts. You don’t act on his words, you continue your earlier movements. Maybe you do want a taste? 

Lando looks at you while feeling himself getting close to his orgasm. He looks at the way you stare at his dick while making the movements that make him feel like this. He had a couple blowjobs before from different girls, but none of them felt as good as from you. How can someone like you - with no sexual experience - be so much better then others? It’s insane. While looking at you he feels his orgasm getting really close.

“Last warning babygirl,” he tells you softly. You still don’t remove your mouth from his dick. Because of his words you know that he’s close, his moans are also giving that part away. You try to take his dick a bit deeper inside your mouth. Before you know it, you notice a salty taste inside your mouth. You quick to find the reason. Lando just came.

Slowly you continue your movements from before, but you decrease your pace more and more. A couple more drops of Lando his cum are finding it’s way inside your mouth. When you think he’s completely empty you remove your mouth. While looking at Lando you swallow his cum. 

“Fuck,” Lando grunts, “I could come again by looking at you doing that.”

You show Lando a shy smile. He pulls you close onto himself. Lando presses a small kiss onto your forehead before moving his lips to yours. He presses another kiss onto your lips. 

“Will you believe me if I tell you that you just gave me the blowjob of my life?” Lando asks you. You are quick to shake your head, “No,” you say. 

“You just did babygirl,” Lando tells you honestly, “I have never been blowed this good before.”

You laugh softly. “Maybe this says something about those others girls,” you say. 

“No,” Lando quickly states, “It says everything about you. You’re really good at this babe. And you did find a really good way to distract me.”

You laugh, “I’ll remember that for the next time. Don’t beat yourself up because of it Lan, tomorrow you will fight for a lot of points. I bet you’re even on the podium.”

“If I get a podium I want to celebrate if with eating you out,” Lando states.

You laugh again. “That’s not a celebration.”

“It is for me.”

Fuck. Why is your stomach tightening because of Lando his words? This can’t be good.

part five

taglist: @booksandplushies @dinodumbass @formula1mount @words-are-cheap @allywthsr @inejghafawifesblog @chonkybonky @formulas-bitch @harrysdimple05 @vildetry06 @wherethefuckisthething @nonameishere @lauralarsen@meadhbhcavanagh @obliviatevamps @shy4turcs @fix5idiots @nightlockcornucopia @marialovesf1 @kapsylia @im-an-overthinker @jule239 @lanando4 @lauralarsen @leclercdream @agentadhd @rewmuslupin @allsouls-emma @iamshiningeuw @teenagedreams-cl @kiskso @loxbbg @vellicora @thomaslefteyebrow @avg-golden-retriever @amorydsmt @killjoynotes

[prettieinpink]

Being that girl once again- back to school!

It’s back to school season everyone, and my favourite times of the year. In this post im going to give you stuff to do for back to school + advice in specific areas of your school life! I hope everyone can take away something from this post <3 

THINGS TO DO BEFORE BACK TO SCHOOL <3

Revise your past term content in your core subjects, ensure there’s nothing you do not understand(it’s better to understand now than have to understand later)

Review what you are going to be learning for this current term in your core subject, you don’t have to study it, just familiarise yourself. 

Catch up with your friends- hang out, call or text before the new school term. My favourite thing is to create predictions of drama, couples etc in the upcoming term w my girlies!

Create SMART goals for you to achieve that term, in any aspect you want. I say; 1 goal for academics, 1 goal for social and 1 goal for extracurriculars/sports. 

Clean your room !! do a deep clean and declutter. E.g wipe down all surfaces, hover pillows, vacuum floor, clean mirrors, take out any clothes you dislike

Do an everything shower + face masks!!

ACADEMICALLY

Everyday afterschool, revise everything that you’ve learnt today + the things that you struggle on

Anytime you get homework, complete it as soon as possible. Most of the time, it’s easy and non time consuming. 

Create study guides for exams/tests while actually learning instead of when the assessments are actually coming up. It saves you a lot of time, which you can use for studying effectively.

If you don’t already, have a specific learning/studying style that works for you. E.g flashcards, blurting, mind map, spaced repetition, the feynman technique. (ofc you can have multiple). Just know the pros and cons of each studying technique. 

Or, what I do is that I assign specific studying techniques to different subjects e.g science - blurting, HASS - flashcards, maths - the feynman technique. This may be different to what you have the most success learning.

Have a place, time every day or at least most days, where you can study without distractions. I like to study at the library afterschool, it’s chill and literally void of any distractions.

The only advice in which i’ll say is not optional– do practise questions under the said test conditions. Stop using websites, listening to music, being on your phone etc. Get in the zone and transfer the environment. 

SOCIALLY

Make an effort to say hi or goodbye to some people, even if you do not know them that well. If you’re up for it, ask them how they are going or how their day has been.

Start remembering names and birthdays. This will literally make people like you so much more, it’s so simple but people swoon over this. Process names in your mind and write down birthdays in your calendar. 

Don’t be afraid to talk to others. Most people do not care if you talk to them, and some are glad that you talk to them. This is how people become well-known or well-liked. 

Watch videos on how to converse with people you do not know well effectively and become close with them. TED x has a lot of videos on this, and are usually helpful. 

Don’t try to fit in with the crowd. It’s so draining, and even if you think they do, they most likely dislike you(sorry!) . Instead, find/be with your people. 

Join a club/extracurricular. You meet so many like-minded people this way, while still developing your own skills. I say everyone should at least have one solid extracurricular. 

If you are in a talking stage, three weeks is enough time for him or you to decide if you’re willing to date them. It’s not the 1920s anymore, we have imessages, facetime, skype and others to communicate and get to know each other without contact

Call out your friends if you notice them doing something toxic or generally anything they shouldn’t do. E.g gossiping, getting mad at others, bullying someone. If they continue, it will influence you in the long run.

MENTALLY 

Reframe your mindset. I know most of us do not favour school, but do not dwell on negativity and find ways to be positive/neutral about your circumstances. You’ll feel so much better.

Detach. Detachment is literally essential in highschool, there’s so much drama and most likely you will somehow get tied up in it. Stop absorbing what happens and let it influence you, observe what happens and learn from it. I have a post on this here. 

Start saying affirmations everyday. I know affs are usually viewed as a manifestation thing, but it doesn’t have to be. It can be a simple one minute way to cultivate a neutral/positive perspective of yourself. 

Journal. Things will happen, so journaling is a great way to discuss your circumstances, feelings, trauma, relationships etc and develop a sense of identity at the same time. I have a post on this here. 

Meditate. It can be go-go-go constantly, but just take a break and gain some mental clarity and see how much better you feel decluttering your mind. 

Embrace a change and growth mindset, especially in an environment where we are constantly required to adapt. 

PHYSICALLY

Start stretching.. seriously. You sit at a desk for like 5 hours a day excluding lunch and recess, everyday, which is of course going to do a number on your body. It can relieve pain in many different areas.

Have at least 1 form of exercise you do everyday. I know being students, we have to sit at a desk constantly. But, do not give up on practising good exercise habits. Not only can it help with results, it’s good for you.

Get the recommended sleep of 6-8 hours per night, which is good quality sleep without disruptions. It helps with long term memory and you’ll feel better. 

Start packing healthy but tasty lunches to school instead of buying. You’ll save so much money in the long run, and it’s better for your body. 

BEAUTY 

Get your uniforms tailored just a bit. Not too noticeable, but enough that it fits better on your body. Especially for button formal shirts, as they make you look 10 times as bulky than what you actually are. 

Buy new jewellery, earrings, necklaces or whatever you’re allowed. Subtle but noticeable jewellery makes girls look so pretty.

Learn new hairstyles!! Don’t just wear the same hair everyday, mix it up, it’s fun and makes you look attractive. 

Get a good eyebrow gel + clear mascara. Legit life changer, I look so much better everyday because I look put together without make up.

apply  vaseline on areas you would apply highlight, but avoid your eye area. 

Have a good skincare regime!! Being a student is stressful, getting pimples is a sign of stress. 

Okay that's it. Happy back to school everyone! Here’s an affirmation for you <3

I am intelligent and capable. I am skilled and confident in my abilities. I am perceived well by others. I am healthy. I am wealthy. I am looking for this term to be full of good grades, vibes, friends, growth and fun. 

[pupyuj]

[cw: dubcon, manipulation, age gap (legal ofc?!), mommy kink, dacryphilia, bondage]

here i am again with another wony thought of mine 😭 i’ve been seeing a lot of wony asks from you guys so here’s something a lil extra on top of me working on the wony stuff ya’ll have been sending/have sent before :] this is a very specific scenario i hope you guys don’t mind LMAO

wony’s never beating the mommy’s girl allegations i fear!

ehehe heiress!wony with you as her mentor figure :(( you’re one of her rich grandfather’s closest associates and since the man’s company was going to get hand over to her soon, it only made sense for the old man to put someone closer to her age as her mentor 😚 but you were still way older, way more mature—and not only was your position intimidating but also the way you carried yourself inside your job and also outside of it simply made you irresistible to wonyoung… so irresistible that she doesn’t say anything when one day, you put your hand on her thigh while you were teaching her your ‘ways’… and it all starts from there really 😋

she would literally do anything for you once everything was said and done and you’ve got her wrapped around your fingers :(( don’t wear anything underneath her little skirt for easy access? yes, mommy. wear whatever outfit you want her to wear for that day? yes, mommy. carry a vibrator inside her cunt and keep up the ‘good girl’ act no matter how good or bad it feels? yes, mommy. talk properly on the phone while you’re pleasuring her sensitive little clit? yes, mommy.

ah, speaking of “mommy”… it’s like she doesn’t even know your name anymore! pretty thing learned fast… you were fucking her on her bed one day—her laptop and all her paperwork pushed aside haphazardly—and she saw how a sick smile formed on your face when she let “mommy” slip out and ever since then it’s all she called you bcs you loved it… what a good girl 🥺 and wony knows better than to speak long conversations with you in public bcs if a single person in the company even hears her say “mommy” there were going to be a lot of questions… and she knows you had enough on your plate! also loves quickies in a bathroom or a small meeting room bcs she just repeatedly whispers “mommy, mommy!” in your ear and you fuck her so much better each time…

oh you’d just love pushing wony to tears, either by edging her or overstimming her… binding her hands with cuffs or some pretty silk restraints above her head and watching her struggle and cry while you fucked her from behind :(( baby’s big on begging… shaking her head profusely when she thinks she’s had enough, “no! nonono, please, mommy…!” and really, you should feel bad for treating her like a whore but it was her fault! she embarrassed you by failing to impress some colleagues of yours… this was her punishment and she has no choice but to accept it :(( “please, mommy, i’ll be good..! i’ll be a good girl, just—ah!—stop, please…” she’s so desperate since she already came so much but :(( she looks so pretty crying! with her little pout and the tears that fell like a waterfall whenever she squeezed her eyes shut and sobbed… how could you not fuck her the entire night??

you still treat her like royalty, however… she is jang wonyoung after all—it’s what she deserves! singing praises in her ear when you noticed how well she was handling all her work as the soon-to-be president of her grandpa’s company, making sure that she’s all comfortable on your lap while she’s working and pleasuring her gently to ease all her pressure… her reward for doing so well after a long day of work? well, a warm bath and some good ass shower sex ofc! 🫣🫣 only giving wony kisses and a little tease by softly massaging her pretty tits but then as soon as you get to the shower, she’s all marked up and she’s screaming “mommy!” (again) while you fuck her so good against the wall…

now neither of you would even bother getting dressed during nights like those! sitting on wony’s bed with her in between your legs while a movie played on the ridiculously huge tv she had in her room… not like you were paying attention anyway. you’d be peppering wony’s neck with kisses while she giggles.. but as soon as one of your hands sneak in between her legs, wony knows it was going to be another long night with her favourite mommy 🫣💓

[bamfkeeper]

Kurt is a 100% a bratty sub. 18+ MDNI

I like to explore all sorts of ways he can be written, and as a sub he is a fucking brat. Fight me. Not a fic, mostly just a collection of thoughts on the topic <3 Not written in any kind of order, it bounces around.

Warnings: Dom/sub dynamics, bratty Kurt ofc, mentions of things like spanking and bondage, overall a lot of basic dom/sub stuff. Written gender neutral, but reader is a top. Skip if it's not your thing. Ignore mistakes unedited.

Kurt is such a brat with you.

He absolutely loves to tease you in every way possible and he talks back a lot. Whether it's during a serious conversation or a playful banter, he never misses a chance to throw in a cheeky comment. He constantly plays around with you in the bedroom, bringing that mischievous attitude into your intimate sessions.

With a sly grin, he'll often respond to a command with a defiant "Nein" whenever you tell him to do something, or challenge you with a bold "Make me." But, you have to admit his playful defiance and cheeky behavior make being his dominant much more fun.

He's such a little shit. But nothing a bit of spanking can fix. Turns out, he's very persuasive when you threaten to spank him. Especially if you use one of your toys for spanking instead of your hand. However he is more durable that you thought he'd be, so spanking can consist of a lot of spanks or hard spanks for him to 'learn' what he did wrong.

This one pouts like his life depends on it too. He tries to hard to get out of punishments by giving you bit puppy eyes. "Bitte...I won't be bad again..." Lies. He will. Your skeptical look and the way you cross your arms makes his heart race and he pouts harder, begging with his eyes not to punish him for disobeying you for the exact same thing again.

Don't give in.

Sometimes you have to tie him up to punish him because his tail likes to get in the way. You don't want to hit it accidentally, his tail is strong but prone to fractures and breaks, especially if you hit it hard enough. So you have to tie it up out of the way, and get on with the punishment. He enjoys bondage more than you'd think, he's so flexible so a lot of the poses you put him in even surprise you from time to time.

Aside from sex, he's super needy and clingy, but he's also mischevious and playful. He always likes being close to you, even when he misbehaves, he seeks you out for reassurance that you still love him (you obviously do), and he lays on top of you. He likes how you act nurturing at times because he failed to experience much of it in his upbringing. The circus was not too kind to him, despite the vast and brilliant shows they performed, there was always a hidden darkness to it that he didn't like to talk about.

Kurt sleeps curled up against you, enjoying the warmth and closeness. He likes being the little spoon and feeling you play with his hair while he settles in for the night. As he gets comfortable, his face buries into your chest, and his tail curls around your leg in a tight embrace. "Ich liebe dich," he murmurs softly against your skin, smiling to himself as he inhales your familiar scent. He finds so much comfort and peace when you hold him close, and he absolutely loves the feeling of security and love it brings. He feels safe, cherished, and content in your arms, knowing that you are there with him. The simple act of being held by you means the world to him, and it's something he looks forward to every night.

Back to the sex aspect, he is needy and whimpers a lot when you bury into him. His cock twitches and leaks onto his blue belly while you stretch him out with your dick (real or silicone whichever fits you). His tight muscles squeeze around you and you huff at how you have to really stretch him. Sweet boy is so flexible too, you can fold him in half and rut your hips into his hole and he will just groan and moan your name loudly.

"So pretty when you whine for me, baby..." You coo to him, watching his face change to a bright violet that dusts over his cheeks and his eyes get glossy from the pleasure. You love to overstimulate him or deny him as a form of punishment for his bratty behavior, he always acts tough but once you get him like this his resolve crumbles down.

"B-bitte...I need to...bitte!" His sweet voice wavers as he begs, looking at you desperately, observing your even face. You have to tsk and sigh, gazing down at him.

"Ah, but baby, you were so, so stubborn earlier...what happened, hm?" you chuckled lightly at the pitiful whine he gives you.

You give in and let him cum or you don't. It's completely up to you and how much you want to hear him beg.

Anywayyy this plagues my brain. Sorry it's short and simple I have two blogs I'm running now lmao it's a lot. But I have lots of drafts!

Thanks for reading <3

*BAMF*

dividers by @/adornedwithlight

[redr0sewrites]

Could you please do fluffy Lucifer head cannons! (I love your Hazbin hotel hcs💗)

🥀A/n: YESSSS OFC!! i love luciii hes so cute

🥀Cw: none, just fluff!!!

lucifer is a very touchy person in general, and when it comes to his partner, he just ADORES giving and receiving affection from you. he always wants to be touching you in one way or another, but he always makes sure to ask beforehand.

he rubs your thumb when you both hold hands!!!! he also seems like the type to gently swing his arm when you both are holding hands and walking side by side, he's just giddy about getting to spend time with you!!!

lucifer loves showing you off. he's definitely bringing you to every event that he attends, and is proudly stating that you're his partner at any given opportunity

MATCHING COUPLES ITEMS!!!! ive said it before and i'll say it again, lucifer is the type to ADORE matching couples outfits, jewelry, mugs, literally anything! u guys have SOOO much matching stuff simply because he adores it

loves sitting in your lap. there is no place in the world more comfortable for lucifer than in your arms, and he just loves being able to cuddle with you in your lap. he MELTS whenever you touch his hair, and is overall very touchy

if your taller than him, he ADORES hugs from behind!!! he loves when you rest your chin atop his head, and won't even mind some light teasing about his height.

loves tickles!!!! sometimes he'll wake you up with tickles or kisses across your face, just so he can hear your laughter

lucifer can't fall asleep without touching you in some way! if you aren't a very cuddly person while you sleep, that's ok, but he still asks to link pinkies while sleeping just so he knows you're there. if you are a fan of cuddles, prepare to be clung to!!

he would adore it if you got along with charlie, and definitely persists at trying to get you two to hangout. he loves the idea of the three of you being a family and doing family things together, and charlie is just happy to finally see him happy, so she's very grateful towards you

lucifer is a RAMBLER, he loves talking about his special interests and cares a lot if you listen to him and act interested too! you definitely learn a lot of duck facts from him, along with anything else that's interesting that he's picked up over the years

FLIRTY!!!!!!! he's sooooo cheesy, and definitely uses the cringiest pickup lines. sometimes he does it to be funny, and sometimes he does it to be serious. he also has a BUNCH of nicknames and petnames for you, and some are satire while others are more genuine

to name a few of the satire one, he'd probably say duckie, pookie, and prince/princess (ironically tho). unironically i think he'd call you dear or "my dearest", darling, and honey as well. he isn't afraid to call you pet names in public, he honestly refers to you more as "dear" than your actual name! i also think lucifer would make up nicknames based on your name specifically. you could have a 3 letter name and he'd still somehow shorten it. definitely gives you nicknames related to your name, say for example your name is rose, he's absolutely the type to call you "rosie posie" instead of just rose

writes you little notes throughout the day and sends them to you magically :) he also buys you practically anything you want, he is rich after all

overall he's very affectionate, and he could never pick a love language when it comes to giving. he just has so much love to give, and he makes sure you're spoiled with affection!!!!!!!!

ack sorry this is so short i promise im still trying 😭 school and family *cough* mom *cough* stuff has been lowkey kicking my ass but ive been SO motivated to write it's actually insane so im trying to power through my 100+ hazbin hotel requests even though ive lowkey moved on- i still enjoy the fandom, but i just need a break yk? ANYWAYS!!!! FEEL FREE TO SEND IN REQUESTS, ESPECIALLYYYYYY ARCANE, TDP, OR ACOTAR REQUESTS!!!!!

[stuckinapril]

how do you fall in love with yourself

unlearn the idea that confidence is conceit. i see this belief imposed on women especially, that if they’re very unapologetic about loving themselves it automatically means they’re narcissistic / think they’re better than everybody else. that’s not true at all. you can love yourself while also acknowledging you’re not inherently better than anyone else. you can love yourself while also being kind & supportive to others. it’s okay to be both of these things at once.

let go of the scarcity mindset. women (everyone really, but especially women) get pitted/compared against each other all the time. you see it w female celebrities in the media, but it’s very prevalent in real life as well. this is very much years of societal conditioning & both women & men partake in this behavior. ignore it. rest easy knowing that there can be multiple beautiful women, multiple smart women, multiple funny women in any environment at any given time. there is enough clout to go around; you don’t need to feel like if there’s another pretty/smart girl it means you no longer have the space to also be a pretty/smart girl. instead operate from an abundance mindset: always (alwaysss) be happy for other girls when they succeed, when they’re praised, when they’re loved, whatever. see them not as competition but as inspiration. envy is such a colossal waste of time bc nobody else’s accomplishments have any bearing on your own!!

get to know yourself more. i love the analogy of dating yourself bc it’s true. i went through a rough period of being around my ex 24/7 to the point i didn’t even know myself, and then i spent the post-breakup year hanging around everyone else constantly to numb my thoughts. now i’m spending more time alone than ever & i’m getting to know myself so much. learning about my taste in fashion, music, everything. and i’ve had so much more time to invest in hobbies & skills, which is very instrumental to building healthy self-esteem. ofc there’s a more balanced way to do this, but make sure you’re not running away from yourself!

what do you like outside of everybody’s opinion? don’t interpret this the wrong way—it’s completely fine to be inspired. every single person you know has copied someone else to an extent. but if you find yourself going too far, not trusting yourself to make the simplest decisions, just following trends blindly and nothing else, you’ve left the inspiration territory and started crossing into plagiarism. move from a place of self-direction and really think about what is naturally appealing to you. it doesn’t matter if it’s not popular or nobody else likes it. if you like it & if it makes you happy, that’s all you need.

practice self-love! i had to do this lol but it works wonders. i started intentionally telling myself that i trust my own taste, that i trust my own choices, that if i think something’s cool it’s good enough, talking to myself kindly etc etc. eventually all this stuff will become natural to you & you won’t find yourself having to expend so much energy into simply loving you for you. don’t give up even if it’s hard to believe at times.

don’t give a fuck. seriously. just don’t give a single flying fuck what someone else has to say. there will always be That One Person who tries to tear you down, belittles you, gaslights you etc etc and if you know in your heart you’re not doing anything wrong, just ignore and keep it pushing. you can’t be everyone’s favorite person (nor should you want to be). think of your favorite celebrity. anyone ever. they probably all got subjected to hate. now think of how they’re successful still & how it didn’t take anything away from them. there you go <3

if literally everyone on this planet starts hating you, loving yourself is still the antidote. to clarify, how others perceive us does hold weight. but if legit every single person i know started hating me, and i still loved myself, i’d probably still live a full life bc my perception is all that really matters in the end. i don’t need anyone else to be my #1 fan—i can do that myself just fine. it technically is actually your world & everyone else is just living in it. so enjoy that! stop giving a hard time to the one person who will always be w you through thick and thin (yourself). eat good food & watch good shows & read good books & just have fun. i love u

[savnofilter]

On to Better Things | k. bakugo

      Pro Hero!DILF!Katsuki Bakugo x [FEM] Reader

CONTENT WARNING(S): sexual content, angst, strangers to lovers.

sfw — toxic & abusive relationship, toxic baby daddy, mentions postpartum, mental health, arguing, mentions of legal proceedings, counseling, drama, cultural family expectations, love bombing, manipulation, a man being a hypocrite, reader low-key needs a new circle of people around them but that's neither here nor there, reader loves their daughter to pieces </3, reader's daughter is a hand full but we stan!, reader spaces out a lot, "our kids are best friends but we never met before and so happen to be single" trope.

nsfw — sexual content, pro hero!bakugo sorry not sorry lmao, bakugo got rizz, fingering, cunnilingus, groping, praise kink, reader has multiple orgasms (2, hinted 4), reader is a bit shy as it's been awhile and feels nervous, vocal queen reader, clothed sex, protected sex, comforting!bakugo, non-established relationship.

COUNT: 11.4k words (45 mins.)

READ MORE: masterlist + [students | bakugo]

A/N: whooph the warnings… imo, it's nothing too serious, but yk i gotta put the warnings up!! it's not graphic, but it does talk ab the stuff listed. i didnt know how else to craft a toxic ex-baby daddy type of situation, and it divulged into this 😭 also use yalls brains with the sfw & nsfw discernment for the warnings… ofc i do not take lightly about what's written, so dont twist it any other way and the heavier subjects being under sfw. i digress!! ive been wanting to write this request for a while and finally got around to it. unfortunately, i alr want to rewrite. :') despite that, i actually kinda really liked this one so i hope yall fw it too. 🫶🏽 thank you, anon!

"Mommy!" Your daughter, Niyuki, calls out to you as she runs into your arms.

She had recently turned 6 years old and still loves the end of the day on Fridays where she could run into your arms, and recount everything about what she had learned that week. Niyuki is pretty much a chatterbox and you weren't too sure where she got it from considering that even your… ex wasn't quite the talkative one either. As you grew to love this quality about her, you found it endearing. Phone calls with her were always a delight and that was how she had persuaded (begged) you to let her go to the park despite having other plans for the day.

You had promised on Monday that she would be able to go to the park in addition to ending her day Friday night off with having a sleepover with her best friend. Niyuki, being an excitable kid, wanted to go straight from school to the park so she wouldn't waste any more time than she already had.

"Hi, Niyuki!" You beam back, a loving smile on your face as you pepper her face in kisses, and hold her cheeks as she tries to shy away with her boundless amounts of giggles. "How was your da-"

"Great -- Mommy you promised we could go to the park today!" Niyuki lightly pushes away from you, a slight whine to her voice as she attempts to get away from your onslaught of affection.

"We can still go, I can't greet my little angel first before I do that?" You poke her cheek as you stand up straight and hold your hand out for her to hold. "Tell me about your day, pumpkin."

There was a skip in her step as she recounted her day to you. When Niyuki gets started, she never stops. She talked about the first moment her feet reached the school grounds, to before school had started, then she talked about her first few classes, after that what she did during lunch and how much fun she had at recess, the "drama" (very unserious but nevertheless cute) that happened before classes resumed and so on. Niyuki is also the animated type and could often run out of breath when she talks. She would use her hands and voice inflictions just to convey what she was speaking about. Sometimes, you even had to remind her to slow down and that time was going nowhere when talking with you.

It was moments like this when you could take in the rambunctiousness and appreciate your lovable daughter. You two only seemed to have special moments like these—well, at least you thought they were special—because of the separation between you and your toxic ex.

Before you two had split your relationship had been decent. Despite that though, you were incredibly in love with him, but the same wasn't reciprocated in a way that emotionally gave back. He'd make excuses as to why he wasn't open to you, his reasoning that he "loved differently" and that if you really loved him you would believe him. So you did. Over, and over, and over again. Hoping that the days where he showed up like in the beginning would become more frequent, but your willingness to stay was how he knew he could toy with you.

He had been your first when you had finally agreed to be an item when you were in your early twenties and it took a long time to finally separate from him when things got bad. In addition to dealing with the conflicting feelings of your then-boyfriend, your friends who only wanted the best for you, and your close family members, you also had to deal with yourself. Nights and days spent venting and breaking down about the man had become so common that your friends' concerns grew. You had so many negative thoughts at that time and you were naive to truly believe that there was a happy ending to overcome this predicament. That his way of loving could change for both of you. His manipulative questions would often linger in your head if you left him, and who were you to argue? When arguments would start to come up again almost weekly, it always ended up with you an emotional mess while he "proved" to you that he was the only one who could handle you.

When your ex noticed you started to pull away, he suddenly had an interest in starting a family. Late nights where you two would lay in bed after making up, he'd share his daydreams about you mothering his children, how beautiful and perfect you'd be to fit in his little world.

Family this, family that. Family values, family roles, family life. You two had been friends since you both were in high school, and it only made sense that you two were dating now and getting married soon. Hell, he even made you question what would your family think if you were "running around" instead of being faithful to him. Imagine the embarrassment to your family if you threw all of that away and weren't able to find someone else like him?

People talk, people notice. Many of the older women noted how great you two looked together, and he was well off with a great future that could support you both. Neither did it help that you changed your once passionate future for being a pro-hero to a different career that was deemed less reliable than your previous choice. It was in your best interest that you stayed with him to avoid the awful gossip in town.

When you haven't been in a situation like yours with an inconsiderate lover, it's hard to understand why you stayed as long as you did. Consequently from being his friend for so long and dating him for years meant he knew the sort of things to target your psyche. To reinforce the pressures you had of making your family look good, mixed with the hidden fears of the burden of following the footsteps of your successful siblings as well.

It was a lot to take in and it wasn't long before you gave in. You just wanted him to be who he was again. The stress only grew older with you and the more time that passed had a looming connotation that the older you got the more undesirable and unfit you are to find another relationship. Even past that, you gave so many years to him. You were a virgin when you two had met, and he had already been around. He knew how to kiss you right, he memorized your soft spots and remembered the best ways to make you come undone. He'd expertly sweet talk you after each session, and on days when you were feeling down he would be the first person to show up, usually bearing gifts of some sort coupled with affection. You couldn't understand what had changed. Why did he decide to start treating you like this? You were vulnerable and scared, and nothing like the familiar could ease the fabricated feeling of comfort.

You thought that having his child would finally fix things but you were so wrong. So very, very wrong. After your first semester in the pregnancy, you had heard talk about people seeing your supposed boyfriend—the father of the child you were soon to birth—with other women. Of course, you didn't believe it, and you refused to listen when your friends tried to tell you. In this stage, you were mostly shut in, as this was taught to be the best preparation for giving birth. You couldn't fathom the fact he would stoop so low. He had his low moments, but not like this. He would never.

He had disconnected you from everyone who had truly cared for you and even convinced your family that you were safe and protected with him. It wasn't until one evening when he had the gall to meet one of his mistresses outside of your house is when you realized it was all true, but it was all too late.

You were an emotional wreck for days. You had hit your lowest and it didn't help that your delivery date was getting closer every day that passed. You'd weep to yourself when you were sure he wasn't around and soon enough the house that you had (forced) yourself to love had once again become a prison. A night when you were tired of the pain is when you decided to reach out to your friends and family again. It was a shameless plea for help and you didn't care how desperate you looked and you wanted out. At first, your parents weren't supportive of the fact that you wanted to leave the man but you didn't care. You wanted to leave everything behind and not give this horrible chapter in your life a look back ever again. With enough talking and white lies, you were able to make a workaround to at least get back up on your feet after your delivery.

The delivery of your daughter, Niyuki, was thankfully a smooth one. Not at all enjoyable but very few complications came along the way when the time came. You had made a deal with your parents that you would stay with them so you could comfortably recover from the delivery whilst being able to safely be under their vision when your ex and his in-laws would come over. Your friends started to visit when you were healing more and had even convinced you to go out with them which you hadn't done for over a year. You were utterly scared as you had missed such a large chunk of socialization that even you didn't think you could do it. But once the night started, you didn't want to go back.

One night out became two, then three, four, five, and so on. The time you were home lessened and it didn't help that your friends were more than willing to let you take refuge at their homes. It wasn't like you were going crazy but the high that you got from drinking and even sometimes having flings became addicting and it felt satisfactory in the way you felt autonomy over your body once again.

You'd ignore the calls from your parents and family including your in-laws, especially any communication from your ex. You had ghosted the situation. The most emotionally taxing period of your life was now being forcefully ignored. You'd spend your time if not partying, then out clubbing. Even when you weren't out on benders, you'd stay up all night and indulge in the fact you were being taken care of by friends. And while you deeply appreciated their hospitality, it was also a double-edged sword. You had dropped out of college, you were no longer reliable and the flings and high feelings were no longer distracting you from the fact that you had some serious issues to deal with.

It got to a point where you'd lay in whoever's spare room and drown in thoughts about the situation you were in. A year before then, you had been stuck with your ex, and somehow a year and a half later you had no idea what that situation was like in that home.

Anxiety and suffocating emotions would swallow you often as the memories of your toxic and abusive ex would soon follow the baby girl you had given birth to. Niyuki. You'd remember her smile, the way she giggled, and how active she was. Although you had only spent about a few months or so with her, you'd remember her bright smile. You'd remember the way her eyes shone when she looked at new things or heard new words—how her face always lit up when she heard your voice, felt your presence, or saw your face. The emptiness without her would eat at you and it was time to forcefully welcome a new cycle of you falling into a depression once again.

At this point, you had lost your job, didn't have any urge to pick up any new hobbies or skills and you'd lay in bed all day. Going out until early mornings trying to ignore the fact that you weren't happy in your current state no longer worked anymore. It was a draining process to get back up but you were willing to give your life a go again. You started looking for jobs that hopefully had good pay and were willing to hire someone with this big of a time gap in their resume. While still couch hopping, you still had places to stay so fortunately you didn't need to worry about that.

When you eventually came around to wanting to be in Niyuki's life again, it was too late. Of course, when you had finally decided to start to better yourself and the suffocating feeling of postpartum had slowly dwindled over time, he was there to make sure that you couldn't take control back of your life. Your ex had found out why you had been gone for so long and eventually had things filed so that he would have sole custody. It seemed as though no matter what you did, he was always ten steps ahead of you. And this time you knew that your support from your family was even less than before.

He had swindled the courts and your families to the point that he painted you as a deadbeat and to the courts, it didn't seem as though there was any evidence to contradict that. Eventually, as you went through counseling and legal support were you able to at least gain visitation, an absence of early childhood not being any signs or indicators that you were unfit to see your own daughter.

It was humiliating settling back into your life and getting back up on your feet. Your parents demanded that you would stay with them as a reassurance that you were serious about getting your shit together and you didn't want to argue. Although with their calloused nature sometimes, they did take care of you well. You couldn't tell what they were thinking but they treated you as gently as they could. Even your family members would come and help out from time to time and it made your recovery better. As stated by the courts, as long as the grandparents (either your parents or in-laws) were there to supervise, a social worker, or the dreaded last option, your ex, was there you would be able to spend time with your daughter.

Months would pass and soon years would follow. When you had shown no signs of negligence or malice occurring in your visits, the judge allowed that you didn't need supervision. Your ex protested but it went unheard. Plus your willingness to get your life together showed your dedication so it was a blessing that you were able to get back to a somewhat decent and regular life despite what has happened. Of course the label that had been placed on you wasn't fully gone, but you were at least able to see your own daughter again.

Which is why you deeply cherish moments like this. After inspections at your apartment, the courts approved that your daughter has now been allowed to stay a few days at your place, and this weekend she was scheduled to stay with you. She would get dropped off by him on Thursdays after school, but you limited the talk to only what was important. Usually, on the first day you get her for the week, you do something with her that she's been wanting to do. As much as you wanted to do it right away, you did make sure her homework was done (she would do it at school just so she could spend more time with you though). Despite her determination, you would still check her work and teach her the things she got wrong much to her dismay. You'd make sure you're on time to drop her off to her evening classes and still wake up early to cook her breakfast every Friday morning. Then you'd drop her off and then pick her up at the end of the day seeing as she had no evening classes on weekends.

"We're here, we're here!" Niyuki cheered, the sweet but mischievous smile never leaving her face when around you.

"It's so pretty out! Wanna get some ice cream, Niyuki?"

"Yes, please!"

After you park your car you hop out and help her out of her seat, holding out your hand for her to take as she knows the routine already. Niyuki admires the familiar park although she has been to numerous times. The way she gazes at everything looks as though this is her first time seeing the place, and this kind of wonder behind her eyes isn't unique to this particular place. No matter how many times she has been somewhere or seen something, her eyes always shine with curiosity and wonder. You can't help but watch her with a faint smile, never wanting to forget what her face looks like ever again.

"Which ice cream do you want, Niyuki?" You ask once you two reach the truck, an assortment of colorful ice cream pictures is decorated on the side of the vehicle.

"Hmm…." Niyuki thoughtfully hums. She raises her free hand to comically tap on her chin as she thinks, the gesture urging a laugh from both you and the ice cream salesman. "Can I have the one with the," She leans closer and points to it, "SpongeBob with the bubblegum, please!"

You think to yourself as you settle for something that's to your tastes, relaying your order to him and searching for your wallet to pay for the cold, sweet treats.

You look over at the man and he nods before leaving to the back, "Coming right up."

In no time at all you two are grabbing ice cream and heading to the playscape. Today was a bit hotter than what you were both expecting so you made a challenge that whoever was able to eat their ice cream without being messy gets to go to bed late tonight. You knew you'd win but it was still amusing to challenge her as her bright spirit came along with a competitive one.

In the midst of you two finishing up your ice cream, a younger but familiar voice calls out to your daughter. You look around confused before spotting a younger girl running towards Niyuki and then engulfing her in a bear hug.

"Mizuki!" Your daughter squeals as they both tightly embrace, her popsicle long forgotten now.

"I didn't know you were coming to the park today!" Mizuki said as she pulled away, still holding onto her best friend. Their bond started from the mere fact that their names sounded similar.

"Yeah, my mommy brought me!" Niyuki pulls away to pull at your dress.

"My dad brought me as a surprise, so I guess it's okay we didn't know!"

The two of them were pretty endearing you couldn't lie. They had been to the same Pre-K together before attending elementary together.

So far you had only met her mother and she was pretty kind. You only knew so much about her though and to your knowledge, she is happily engaged at this point. You two would talk often when the two played, often sharing play dates when it was your turn to have Niyuki on the weekends. That's how Niyuki and Mizuki were able to twin, have sleepovers, etc. While having other friends at school, those two were joined at the hip.

That's why you were utterly confused to hear about her father.

You knew nothing about him except for the fact that he and Mizuki's mother mutually decided that things just weren't working out. It's not like she knew much about your ex either. It seemed as though the separation of parents helped bond the two kids, but you felt saddened at how completely different the two situations were. You sometimes worried if Niyuki was embarrassed by this knowing it wasn't always easy at school due to the teasing.

"Mizuki!" A deeper voice calls out to the young girl. With the young girl's name being called, she turns around and excitedly waves him over. You pause in your tracks as you take him in.

Ashy blonde hair that resembles an explosion sits at the top of his head smothered in appearance by his hat, while his eyes are also covered by a pair of what appeared to be designer sunglasses. He sported a relaxed fit, a gray tank top with a light mesh patterned throw-over that did nothing but tease the muscles underneath the cloth, the colors on it being black and white. The look is finished off with black baggy pants and some boots. You could tell he was attractive even without the cover-up. As you finish up the assessment of your daughter's friend's (hot) dad, it occurs to you the fact that he had sunglasses on doesn't hide the fact that you were totally just checking him out.

"Mizuki, I told you to stop running off like that." He grabs the young girl and gives her a playful nuggy.

"Sorry Daddy!" Mizuki giggles and slips away from him and runs to hide behind you instead, your daughter following. They both peek from behind you, and you have no other choice but to introduce yourself.

"Hi, you're Mizuki's dad, I'm guessing? I'm Y/N, Niyuki's mom." You smile warmly.

He nods at your assumption, his expression still the same as before. "Katsuki, it's great to finally meet the mother of this other troublemaker's friend." He playfully steps in Mizuki's direction and she immediately runs to your other side, giggling.

Something about him was eerily familiar. You couldn't place your finger on it, but you simply chalked it up to the fact you have probably seen him in passing at a few of their birthday parties or so. But something about that didn't feel right… Either way, you ignore it. It wasn't a bad feeling but the fact you couldn't place your finger on it would later down the road bug you. You decide to ask instead.

"Have I seen you—"

"Daddy, can we go to Niyuki's house to watch movies now?" Mizuki cuts you off in the middle of your question, undoubtedly earning a glare from her father.

"Mizuki, what'd I tell you about interrupting people when they talk?" Bakugo lifts his sunglasses this time, his gaze revealing he was solely looking at her.

She pouts using you as a shield once again before tugging on your clothes. "Sorry oba-san…" Mizuki says with one of the deadliest puppy faces you've ever seen. There was no doubt she was one of the cutest 6-year-olds you have ever seen. How could you be annoyed with a look like that?

"It's okay, Mizuki. What were you asking?" You ask them and turn better, bending down a bit to be at both of the girl's levels.

"Can we please watch movies in Niyuki's playroom? Pleeaaseeee?" Mizuki asks and your daughter steps up to beg as well.

"Please, Mommy!! We'll be good too!" Niyuki reasons.

"I'm not sure, ladies…" You trail off as you consider that maybe Katsuki himself probably planned out for the afternoon and didn't want to forcefully make him commit to an impromptu earlier playdate.

"It's alright." Katsuki pipes up and you three look back at him. He lightly shrugs and answers as if he could read your mind, "We were going to play it by ear for the rest of the day anyways."

The two children couldn't quite comprehend the second bit of what he said, but they did understand that it was a yes from what he said in the beginning. They gleefully look at you and start tugging and hugging at you.

"Please, Mommmyyy!" Niyuki pleads, now joining in on giving you a hard to disapprove of puppy look as well.

You lightly laugh and nod your head, finally pulling them in for a proper hug and then giving them a tickle to fend off their offensive stance. "Okay, okay! We can do the movie night! But I want you two to at least spend an hour or so here before agreeing to let you two be cooped up inside for the night."

"Okay!" They exclaim in unison. The moment they break free of your grasp is when they run to the playscape. You sigh as you stand up and give Katsuki a soft smile before properly sitting down on one of the benches. He's close second to following your lead, you both now watching as the two girls play with each other as well as other kids. It seemed most parents decided today was a great day to let their kids out. Mostly because it would tire them out for the night which was a plus.

"I wasn't expecting Niyuki's mother to be so beautiful," Katsuki randomly says, cutting the silence. You look at him with a surprised look on your face, a blush starting to rise on your complexion.

"I could say the same for Mizuki's father." You bashfully laugh and un-subconsciously move to adjust your clothes. Admittedly you were not as designer dressed as he was, nor were you in your best fit. One thing to notice other than his attractiveness is that he has impeccable style. Something that shocked you a little since men in their 20s (especially with kids) don't seem to care too much these days. It wouldn't shock you if he had some sort of unconventional job.

He turns to you when you respond, a teasing smirk now dawning on his face. You don't miss the look-over he gives you and you're sure that he wasn't trying to hide it either. "You know they'll be all tired before they reach halfway through the first movie…"

"That is true…" You play into his words as you look forward instead. You feel your heart start to race when he rests his arm on the back of the bench behind you. You could feel the warmth of his skin through the cloth and welcome it. The weather was too hot but his touch was something you were starting to get curious about. "I guess that'll just leave us two to relax then."

"I could help you with that, I'm a pro at saving people."

You hum at his words, "You're a chivalrous man, that's uncommon these days," a teasing smile to rival him now finds its way on your face. "What else are you good at, Katsuki?"

"I'm also really good with my hands." Katsuki humors you, his hand shifting near your shoulder where his arm lay. "Pretty strong too."

"Ah, so those muscles aren't just for show?" Feeling bold, you reach to rest your hand on his thigh, his muscles immediately flexing under your touch.

He leans in closer to whisper in your ear as he answers, his hand now resting lightly on your shoulder. "I gotta make sure I'm always in shape to save beautiful women like you."

A buzzing near your touch catches you off guard as you try to not completely fold at his words. A catchy ringtone soon follows the buzzing and it's now apparent that what you were feeling was his phone. He pulls away with a huff and pulls out his phone, excusing himself as he answers it.

You exhale a breath you didn't realize you were holding in as he leaves. You can't remember the last time you had talked to a male, much less flirted. Most of your days surrounded working and finishing up school as you wanted nothing but the best for your kid. You didn't go out often anymore, and if you did, you only stuck around with your friends. You couldn't complain but feeling so affected like this was starting to make you feel nervous, almost like when you had got back out into the dating world the first time. You tried not to think about those thoughts.

Now, you were back to watching the girls again and they seemed to be having a blast. The day's heat didn't phase them at all and they played to their heart's content. It seemed as though they were playing cops & robbers with the other kids, and honestly, you didn't care what they were doing as long as they were being safe. The good thing about the friendship between the two was that they always looked out for each other; never mind the fact that their circumstances brought them closer together.

Even with how hard you've been trying to do this mother thing, inescapable thoughts always plagued your mind. Mainly about the fact if your daughter truly wanted to stay with you. This whole arrangement of only getting to see your child three days a week has been going on for about a year and some change now. You know that it'd be too early for her to get "tired" of you, but you can't help the fear of her getting sick of you. One thing was for certain is that you definitely are not as well off as her father although you did make sure to pick up extra shifts when you wanted to get her something real nice.

However, your moment of contemplation comes to an end when two girls come barreling towards you, their approaching giggles making you snap out of your thoughts.

"Mommy!"

"Yes?" Your eyes refocus and you smile softly at the two girls, their wild energy showing how much they truly were out there on the playground having fun.

"Can we have some ice cream please!" Mizuki asks, tugging your arm.

"Please, please, please, PLEASEEE!" Niyuki begs.

You gape a bit overwhelmed at the two young energies, trying to reason with yourself as Niyuki had already gotten ice cream prior. You were sure her best friend did as you knew that both her parents loved to spoil her—even before you had an introduction to Katsuki. It was a hot day and you didn't seem to mind, you were getting pretty hot as well…

"... Okay, but that's the last before we head home! When you finish, that's enough park time."

Your answer is to their standards as they both shower you with affection to thank you for caving into their cuteness. You roll your eyes but the smile doesn’t disappear as you keep an eye on them as they wander to the truck.

"Sorry 'bout that," The new but familiar voice calls out as he walks up to you. "Important business and shit."

Your brows raise at the casual curse and laugh a little, folding your arms as you look up at him. "No problem, but I did tell them that we will be leaving as soon as they finish their ice cream." You inform, nodding your head towards their direction as you keep an eye out for them.

"Great timing, I was about to talk to you about that."

— ✮ ★ ☆ —

The two girls were happier than ever riding together back to your apartment. They sang along to their favorite songs, played I Spy, and talked about all sorts of things you expect from children. It's easier to tune them out when you're around them long enough.

Their excitement continued when you got to your home. As soon as you reached your unit the two beelined to the kitchen after dropping their shoes and bags at the door. And yes, you guessed it, they had matching pairs too. Niyuki knew to go to the kitchen first thing though as she knew you would make something in the meantime before the movie started.

"You two know the rules! Stay near the island to avoid getting bit by sharks!" You called out to them as you fixed up the entryway. You listen out to hear them, still hearing them squeal and toy around in there. You slip off your shoes, adding them to the rest of the shoes before lazily pulling on your house slippers. "The sharks are coming in five… four… three…!" Your warning does the trick as by the time you reach the kitchen they're both sitting in their respective seats and both looking mischievous and peeking at you behind their hands. You make a show of surveying the room as if you can't see where they are and the girls are now "safe" for following your directions. "It seems as though the sharks are clear!"

They celebrate the win, now eager to watch you work your magic.

You three had a fun time as you tried your best to make sure they were safe (the entire time you were internally panicking to make sure everything was okay). Niyuki liked watching you cook and you were more than happy to help her learn as well as do some hands-on stuff. It was only natural that her best friend would follow suit in her curiosity. Niyuki's sole enjoyment of watching you cook is what encourages you to do it more often and get better at it too.

Now there was an assortment of snacks aside from their main meal. It was true that you spoiled her a wee bit when she was with you, but you couldn't help it. Niyuki was your everything and when times were needed you were able to say no.

Once you set up their bowls with their food, the doorbell rings. You figured it was the man who would make another appearance for the night.

"Alright girls, bring your food to the room." You command and watch them leave before making it out into the hallway, finally answering the door when they are both in the designated room. "Katsuki!" You smile and open the door wider.

The blonde-haired male grins at you and holds up the childishly bright bags for Mizuki. "Sorry for taking so long. This should be everything." You nod and reach for it, his actions making you pause as he pulls it a bit towards him as if to hold it from you. "Is it alright if I see Mizuki before I leave?"

You feel your skin flush in embarrassment, hastily stepping to the side and opening the door more to let him in. "I-I am so sorry! Of course, you can," You close the door and lock it behind him when he finally steps in and gets his shoes off. He doesn't need much introduction when two heads pop out from the doorway of the playroom, one squealing in excitement as she runs up to her father to hug him.

"Daddy you're here!" Mizuki exclaims and pulls him in the direction of the room. "Come look at Niyuki's playroom!"

"I'm not sure--"

"No, no it's okay! Let me clean up the kitchen in the meantime." You smile as the three make their way to the room.

Sticking to your word, you waste no time cleaning up. You have a slight hum as you move around the kitchen, appreciating how well today has gone so far. You even met your daughter's best friend, hot dad… who would've thunk? You bite your lip to suppress a giggle that threatens to escape you, a giddy smile still on your face. Gosh, when was the last time you ever found someone attractive? It felt like forever since you've been focusing on parenting, school, and not to mention having a job.

You think about how well the man dressed and how good he smelled. You had to hand it to him, he was really put together and you could see why Mizuki's mother let him in the first place. He didn't seem too bad personality-wise either. Katsuki was the right amount of cheeky and arrogant that was the complete opposite of your ex. It didn't help that his well-defined muscles and physique showed with his great fashion taste. Luckily for you though, Katsuki felt the same way about you.

When he had first seen you, there was no mistaking in the way he immediately found you attractive. Dressed in your form-fitting sundress surely accentuates everything about your womanly body. The way the cloth hung to your mounds and all the beautiful parts of your limbs. But unlike you, he was able to hide how much he was checking you out. Except while indoors he no longer needed sunglasses and he was sure you were feeling the same way about him.

Katsuki's eyes are trained on your butt as you flawlessly move around, the color of your dress perfectly folding around the two globes of your ass as you move. He leans against the doorway once he finally looks up at the back of your head, crossing his arms. "Hey," Katsuki's voice calls out to you. You whip your head around to look at him, eyes enraptured with how attractive the young man is. "Sorry for the weird behavior earlier at the park…"

"It's okay! Really. Stuff comes up sometimes, glad that you were able to get it settled." You turn off the sink and dry your hands, turning to face him as you place the towel on the island in front of you. You don't miss the way his eyes drag down to check out your body.

"The girls will probably knock before they even finish halfway through the movie," Katsuki predicts, his eyes predatory when he looks up at you. "could make it up to you while they're busy."

You shy as you two make proper eye contact. "How could you possibly make it up to me?" You bat your lashes at him, a faint blush heating your skin at the implications of his offer.

An attractive grin spreads across his lips as he pushes off your doorway. "I could show you but it's better if we do it somewhere private."

It takes everything in you to hide the chill that runs up your spine at how he easily toyed with ideas without being so vulgar with it. As if your body is moving on its own, you walk towards him and flash a smile that has equal parts of mischief and seduction.

"I'm interested."

As soon as that door closes behind you two, there is no denying the tension that fills the room. His lips are soft and hot against yours and the feeling has your body tingling. His heavy and calloused hands are tight on your hips as he pulls you closer to his chest, your hands placing themselves on his biceps to try and steady yourself against him. Katsuki hums in satisfaction, tasting your sweet lip gloss on his mouth, teeth moving to nip at your bottom lip to ask for more. You willingly comply and open your mouth although timid about the experience.

You were feeling fresh in the kitchen but now that you two were getting down to it, you were starting to feel shy again. Up until now, it had practically been years since you dated a man, much less kissed or hooked up with one. There was no denying that you were attracted to this man but your mind was starting to cloud with doubts that you wish would just go away. You try to ignore it erstwhile you feel his strong hands slip down to grab your rump through the beloved sundress you wore today.

You softly groan in the kiss as he pulls away, eyes with innocent determination to see this through. His eyes are hot on you and it takes everything in you not to look away. He walks you to your bed, instantly getting on top of you once he has you adjusted to his liking. In a hurry, you move to untie one of the straps on your shoulder, his heavy hand stopping you as he leans into your ear to convey his true thoughts

"'Gonna fuck you in this dress, princess," Katsuki smirks down at you when he pulls away and stands up properly. He tugs you towards the edge of the bed so that your legs hang off the edge, his hands on your hips. He leans down to give your lips a chaste kiss before spreading your legs and kneeling between them. Katsuki's hands softly grip your ankles, the tips of his fingers disappearing at the hem of your dress. His hands slowly drag the fabric up, his hot lips that were once on yours now kissing their way up on your left leg as took his time exposing his skin. "Keep looking at me, baby." Katsuki directs when you lose eye contact with him as he finally meets your inner thigh, his teeth giving the plush skin a teasing bite. You softly whimper, the apparent wet spot on your panties deepening.

He groans at your scent and slightly pulls away to look at your cunt, his hands now placed on the back of your thighs and pressing it to your body. He takes his knuckle to rub up against your labia, adding more pressure once he reaches the top of your cunt to play with your clit. You wantonly moan as he continues to rub at your clit, the fabric of your panties creating a friction that was heavenly but frustrating you greatly. You needed to feel his fingers on you and this wasn't cutting it.

"Katsuki," You breathe out, hips bucking into his handling. He simply hums at you calling out his name, his rubbing slowing down as his gaze now has a teasing glint to it. "N-Need more, please, Katsuki," There's a whimper in your voice, only barely hinting at the desperation that this man can stir inside you.

"More've what?" Katsuki grins at how flushed your expression is, your face dreamy as ever.

"Fingers, need them." You manage to prop yourself up on your elbow as the other reaches down to tug at the panties on your hip. Katsuki snickers at your impatience, his thumb pulling aside your panties to expose your soaked cunt to him. He gives you one last kiss on your inner thigh before he wordlessly dives in.

Katsuki applies his tongue flat against your cunt and gives you a long stripe up until it reaches your clit, just like what he had done with his knuckle moments ago. A breathless moan escapes your lips as he starts to swirl his tongue against the erect bud, his textured and wet muscle taking pride in its work. He closes his mouth around your cunt, leaning more to taste more of the slick that your cunny produces. The vibrations of him moaning from the taste makes you shiver, this feeling of having your cunt licked like this felt so familiar but foreign at the same time. His eyes stay glued to you as he pleasures you, finding everything you do so damn attractive to look at.

Lapping a bit more he pulls away and spits on your cunt using his fingers to lube you up more. He wraps one of his arms around your thigh and holds it to his shoulder, holding you in place as he finally inserts two thick fingers into your cunt. Soon enough, his mouth is back into your count, the tip of his tongue playing with the sensitive bud at the top of your pussy.

The sounds grow increasingly more obscene as he shamelessly laps at your cunt and works his fingers into you. His digits curl to find your g-spot, softly teasing the spot and eliciting more volume from you. You quickly try to hold back how loud you are, walls clenching around his fingers at how good it feels. You bite your lip and suppress a loud groan from slipping out, hips attempting to pull back with no use. Katsuki keeps you locked in close to him and ups the ante by using the tips of your fingers to continue to stroke at the sensitive spot of your g-spot. His tongue now applies more pressure to your clit to bring you further.

"'Suki--" You call out, your hand coming down to grip and tug at his hair. Shivers rack through your body as a long and drawn-out orgasm hits you, his movements aiding to help you bring you down from it. He pulls his fingers out and presses his tongue flat against your cunt to clean up the mess between your legs. You move your hips back in protest and he loosens his grip to let you do so.

You watch with bated breath as he starts to unbuckle his pants, your eyes glued to what is soon to be revealed. Katsuki's movements to get his garment removed are so fluid that you almost miss it when he pulls the condom out from his back pocket. He tears open the soft foil with his teeth and applies the slippery protection onto his hard cock. You instinctively open your legs when he draws closer, a soft mewl leaving your lips when he aligns his tip to your opening.

"You good?" Katsuki softly asks, his other hand holding your thigh open, thumb rubbing your thigh as he awaits your answer. You nod your head and grind your hips against his tip, hand coming up to pull him closer to you as you answer.

"Give it to me, Katsuki."

The man grins at your plea and lays you on your side, choosing to slowly sink himself into you from your approval. The obscene moan you let out gets covered up by Katsuki's lips finding itself upon yours again, happily taking in your willful noises. At first, he takes long and drawn thrusts, trying to accommodate his size for your comfort. This position allows no remorse and you already knew what you were in for when he put you in it. When you two separate from the kiss, his lips are quick to find your neck, his hands now respectively on your ass and thigh to hold you in place. Amid a deeper thrust, he gives an equally rough bite, the force making you moan. You relax your leg more to allow him to hold you better, him taking your actions as the go-ahead to pick finally pick up the pace.

You feel as though you are on cloud nine with his wet kisses and teasing bites covering your neck, his thrusts and handling furthering your ecstasy. His skin smacks against yours as he starts to get rougher with his thrusts, hands gripping you tighter too. You grip at the sheets below you and tilt your head back, mouth agape as you so desperately try to keep up with him. He gives your ass a spank when he feels your pussy clench around him, an animalistic growl coming from him as he repeats this. He pulls away from your half-covered chest and glares at the top of your dress, now getting annoyed at the article of clothing.

Katsuki doesn't slow his hips for a second as he more than easily rips open the top of your dress and earns a discontent whine from you that gets forgotten when he presses a bit deeper into your cunt. His lips press themselves to your newly exposed skin, his tongue happily taking in one of your nipples to suckle and nibble on. There's no mistaking that he's having free reign in the marks on your skin but you're too wrapped on how everything feels to care. An expletive leaves your mouth in a string of whispers when he angles his hips to hit your g-spot, prompting you to reach down and rub your clit for more stimulation.

"Fuck," Katsuki cusses under his breath as he leans up to watch you take his cock, nails digging into your skin and enjoying the way your pussy envelopes his cock. Not to mention the hot visual of you playing with yourself furthering his contentment. He lifts your leg a bit under your knee and quickens his pace. He watches with hungry eyes as your tits bounce at the force, a pretty face to match and his marks all over your body's skin. He groans as his thrusts start to feel heavier, his orgasm impending. He nearly loses it when you grind back against him to chase your release.

There was an air of innocence that surrounded you but everything you did said otherwise. Katsuki simply couldn't get enough of you and he simply didn't want to. Fuck, he wasn't expecting his daughter's best friend mom to be super hot and sweet.

"C-Cunming…!" You mewl, brows scrunch in concentration as you finish off on his cock. His swift thrusts help in coaxing it out of you, slick dripping from your cunt and messy-ing up your inner thighs. He swoops down to give you an open kiss, tongue pressed against yours haughtily as he follows your climax with his own after a few more pumps.

After a few lazy and exchanged kisses he pulls away, a string of saliva connecting you two. You laugh a little as you wipe the remnants away. "That's the best I've had in a long time." You jokingly cut the silence, a chuckle from him following.

"Could say the same." He softly grunts, pulling out from you, and gently places your legs down. He effortlessly picks you up and rests you further on the bed where your legs can find refuge on the plush mattress. "You okay, need me to get anything?"

The first question confuses you. To your recollection, you had never been asked that before. Not after sex when the deed has already been done and the willing participant has already had their fill. A pang of displaced emotions starts to wrack up inside you, a nervous laugh coming from you when you realize that you spaced out trying to conceptualize what you had just been innocently asked.

"Y-Yeah, I'm good! Thanks for asking," You smile sweetly and the cute expression earns a pat on the cheek from him. Shamelessly, the gesture shot a jolt of arousal straight to your core.

"You got a bathroom around here?"

Following Katsuki's departure leaves you in silence. There was a feeling of dissonance that you couldn't really place your finger on and the fact it was all coming together was undoubtedly giving you the worst post-nut clarity ever. You didn't regret having sex Katsuki, that wasn't the case, but how not sleazy he was certainly opened up your eyes. The male decency that you have been robbed of for so long was finally starting to settle and you didn't like the feeling one bit. Tears start to burn in your eyes and you desperately try to wipe them away the longer you sit in your thoughts.

Fortunately for you though, the doorbell sounds repeatedly which slowly brings you back to the present. Your once feelings of despair and disgust are now turning into annoyance. You take your time slinking out of your bed, you catch a glimpse of yourself in the mirror and huff at how disheveled you looked. The dress that you've been dying to wear was now torn and stretched, the condition bringing a pout to your face.

You undress fully and grab one of your robes to cover yourself up with, the piece is a bit scandalous but covering you well. You quietly make your way down the hall to not wake up the two girls (if they were awake they definitely would've interrupted you and Katsuki) and finally make it to the door. You peer into the peephole and softly gasp at the person behind the door. The doorbell starts to buzz loudly again and you angrily fumble to unlock your door, it now also occurs to you that the noise could be disturbing the two young girls' sleep.

"Are you fucking crazy?!" You greet your ex with much-deserved hostility.

Shindo simply rolls his eyes at your annoyance and crosses his arms as if it were your fault for his impatience. "I called and texted you multiple times. I'm here to pick up Niyuki."

You openly scoff at his demand, standing taller at his attempt at showing his dominance. You mirror his actions and cross your arms too.

"She's staying with me for the weekend. Why are you here?"

Your ex mockingly scoffs at you questioning him, his eyes narrowing as he steps closer.

"I need to explain why I want my daughter to be with me? You know, the parent who never neglected her once in her entire life." Shindo looks you up and down, openly grimacing at how fucked out you look. "You can't even control yourself, you have no shame, do you?"

As much as you try to keep up the strong facade, there is no denying the tightening in your chest. You don't want to admit it but his words hurt you deeply. His toxic words were starting to feel all too familiar and your body was starting to shut down.

"The agreement was that she would stay the weekend with me. Niyuki's having a sleepover with her friend, there's no point of you coming here."

"Do you think I fucking care about a "sleepover" when her mother is busy being a tramp when she's distracted?" He shamelessly accuses and shifts his expression to one of fake pity and concern. "Do you think you deserve her, hm? I mean look at you, running around and can't even stay committed to us even when I've tried."

"Watch how you fuckin' talk to her, asshole."

A voice filled with just as much disdain comes from behind you, the sheer amount of aggression battling Shindo's. You immediately turn to look at him, mind moving faster than your body in your shocked state.

"I'm sorry, who the fuck are you exactly?" Shindo tilts his head and reaches out to push the door further to reveal who the man is. He freezes when a blonde and spiked hair catches his eyes first, his mockery of emotions from earlier now turning into real anger and a hint of fear. "Bakugo-?!"

Katsuki grabs the edge of the door and pulls it open wider to allow him more space to pass, making sure not to harm you as he gets between you and your toxic ex. "You wanna repeat that, dickhead?" He fists up his shirt and backs him away from the door. "Is that how a hero treats a woman, eh?"

Shindo curses under his breath, fighting against him. The mach attitudes between the two start to boil over as it's obvious that they have met prior. When it escalates to more than words, you start getting a bit fearful. A more aggressive push from Katsuki prompts you to call out for them to stop. One thing about your ex is that he hated being out matched and there was no denying that Katsuki seemed like the type of guy to beat that out of him. It wasn't until their exchange seemed to elevate in volume and another light next door turned on. You plead for them to stop again, your hand lightly tugging at Katsuki's arm although knowing your touch wouldn't be able to do shit against a muscled man like him. Eventually they do stop on Katsuki's accord, both breathing heavily as they stare down at each other. Your ex aggressively scoffs and shoves Katsuki away from him as he looks between you two, gathering himself.

"Have fun with the little gold digger, Dynamight," Shindo says lowly and bumps shoulders with Katsuki as he leaves.

A heavy silence is left in his wake between you and Katsuki. You tiredly rub your face and breathe out a sigh, the exhale soon turning into a dry sob. Katsuki fidgets awkwardly before reaching out to you and pulling you close, letting you rest your forehead on his chest.

"Fuck, he stresses me out," You mumble against his tank, wiping away your tears. "I'm sorry you had to witness that…"

"Hey, he's fuckin' douchebag, alright? Who gives a fuck what he thinks." Katsuki pills away a bit to cup your chin and forces you to look up at him, the gesture warming your cheeks. "Let's get you cleaned up and you can rant about whatever the fuck you want, it's getting cold." He holds the collar of your robe and gives it a playful tug. You softly nod your head then lead him inside.

— ✮ ★ ☆ —

It had only been two days since you had first met and slept with Katsuki and the smile on your face never seemed to disappear.

Thinking about the man easily brought butterflies to your chest, memories of you two keeping you on cloud nine. After you two had gone back inside Friday night, he had comforted you in many ways. It felt silly to say it—that the foreign feeling you were getting in your chest only had one name: a crush. Not full-blown but enough that every time you thought about your Friday night—past the awful interaction with your ex-boyfriend—was one of the best times you have ever enjoyed yourself with a man.

Katsuki did listen to you. He cleaned you up, cuddled you, kissed you throughout, and eventually you two even two more rounds. Never had you felt so comfortable, so… domestic. It was evident that your bright attitude was something your daughter noticed too.

"Mommy?" Niyuki calls out from the doorway, successfully gaining your attention.

You press the small bento box you were prepping Mizuki to take home closed, a smile on your face as you welcome your daughter to make her way to you. "What's up, munchkin?"

"I have to tell you something," She tugs at your pajama pants, a look far from playful or childish in her eyes. You feel your heart sink a bit at how serious she is, bending down to get face level with her.

"Niyuki? What's wrong?" You hold her arms and pull her closer to you, trying to keep contact with her as she avoids looking at you.

"I don't want to go to Pa's this week, I want to stay with you."

You're taken back from her confession, unsure of how to process it. "What do you mean, 'Yuki? Don't you want to see daddy-?"

"No, I want to stay with you," Niyuki regains her courage to look up at you, establishing how much she truly feels. "I heard you guys last night. I want to stay with you more. Daddy's house isn't nice, I don't like it there anymore."

"Niyuki, I…" You shamefully look away at the fact she bore witness to that awful exchange last night. You felt awful that she had seen it, much less found out how dysfunctional your relationship is. You pull her in for a hug and nuzzle her hair and she is more than willing to take in your embrace. "I am so sorry you had to see that, baby. Mommy will see what she can do about how you feel being at Daddy's house, okay?" You hold her cheeks in your palms and she nods her head in agreement.

She places a kiss on your cheek and swiftly leaves the kitchen as if the exchange didn't happen, leaving you by yourself in the kitchen. You stare off into the distance at the exchange, not sure what to think or do with yourself. It wasn't until you felt a wet sensation coating your cheeks that you realized you were crying.

Faintly down the hall, you could hear Niyuki nagging at her best friend and the two giggling and playing around as children do. You sit down on the floor and rest against one of the cupboards as your doubts start to ease themselves, everything in your life turning around so fast that it's hard to grasp.

You had thought for the longest time that Niyuki was simply putting up with you. It is no lie Shindo has more resources than you. The money, house, toys, etc. he has everything you don't. He didn't need to work the extra shifts to make sure she had presents for special occasions, he could easily buy the things she needed and wanted. You thought the only things that could make a child satisfied were the things they could see, touch, and have. You didn't think the small things counted, not when you're an adult where a random Friday could have easily been one of her favorite days in her childhood.

You don't bother wiping the tears from your face as you try to pull yourself together, snot and everything clouding your nasal passage. Oddly you felt numb, like the joy you were feeling was foreign. Nothing felt real but you knew you couldn't stay sitting on your kitchen floor silently crying as you desperately tried to register what the hell your body was going through at the moment. You weakly pull yourself up using the counter to grab a paper towel from the dispenser on the counter and obnoxiously blow your nose into it. You mumble a few cuss words under your breath as you attempt to freshen up as you try coming down from the emotional rollercoaster of this weekend. As much as you wanted time to process this, doing it in a home with a kid who could barge in at any minute was hard. Especially when there are two.

The doorbell rings and you glance at the time on the stove. It was a bit early for Mizuki's mother to pick her up, but you decided you'd just invite her in until the child was ready to leave.

You lazily walk over to the door and peer into the peephole to double-check, your face twisting into an expression of shock as you pull open the door and wordlessly confront the person on the other side.

"... Do you normally answer the door looking a mess?" Katsuki teases, giving you a look over and lingering at the places he seems to like.

You jokingly nudge him and roll your eyes, crossing your arms as you stand a bit taller, feeling your heartbeat pound against your chest. "Haha, very funny." You sniffle and wipe your cheek, the gesture not going unnoticed.

"Did something happen? Did that prick come over and harass you again?" Katsuki grows angrier at the idea, his expression souring.

"No, no, it wasn't that." You quickly ease his concerns and this time remind yourself to look around to make sure there aren't any extra ears before stepping out and closing the door behind you. "This morning, Niyuki told me she wants to stay with me, not just on the weekends." You look up at him finally, your lips immediately curling into a soft smile once you're able to say it out loud.

He grins and pulls you in for a hug, giving you a squeeze when you wrap your arms around his shoulder and squeal. He rocks you back and forth before pulling away while maintaining his hold on your waist. "This shit feels unreal, you know?" You lightly laugh as you look up at him, a radiant smile on your face.

"Her mother is amazing, of course she'd want to stay with you." Katsuki gives your hip a squeeze with his free hand, the action pulling your attention to the solid object digging into your side, the feeling making you look down at his hand.

"Oh," Katsuki steps back and holds up a slim, medium box that had a ribbon tied around it, holding it up for you. "Here."

"For me?"

"Who else, dumbass?"

You snort at his bluntness and shoot him a playful glare as you open the gift. It takes you a few seconds to realize what it is, a gasp following your surprise at the expensive dress, and start to close it back up. "Oh my god, I-I can't have this!"

"Why not? You'll look perfect in it." Katsuki pulls you closer with his hand that was still on your hip, his other landing on your abandoned one. "Pretty girls deserve pretty things."

You playfully push him away and look at the box again before looking up at him. "Seriously, for me?"

"Yes." Katsuki holds your chin up and softly rubs your bottom lip under the pad of his thumb. "And you better get used to it, I'll be buying you a lot of those."

"Why?" You laugh, leaning into him and tilting your head up to challenge him.

"'Cuz I'll be tearing a lot more stuff off of that pretty body of yours," He leans closer to brush his lips against yours with a smirk on his face, "Plus, I need an excuse to see you again."

He seals his promise with a kiss, hands coming up to hold your waist as he presses himself against you.

— ✮ ★ ☆ —

It had been a few months since you and Katsuki had officially started dating. Your mood significantly has changed for the better and made it a lot easier to adjust to having your daughter now finally staying with you instead of her father.

It was hard being able to advocate for yourself but the verdict was in favor since the child should be able to choose where to stay. It did help the fact that your new boyfriend, who you had learned and realized is a top pro-hero in the country, just so happened to bring the best kind of reputation to the courts.

As adults do, you did talk to Mizuki's mother before deciding to fully go through with dating the man. Ultimately it is true that she can't decide what you two do, but you owed it to her for being such a good friend to you and didn't want to step over any toes. She was more than happy to give her blessing and practically threw him over to you, more than happy to let things rest since she is soon to be married anyway.

There was nothing that could prepare you for this turn of events and every day it was easier to wake up feeling happy and blessed. Currently, you just got your culinary degree so that also means one less stress and burden off of your shoulders and another venture soon on the horizon: a head chef.

You just adjusted your graduation gown and looked around for your family, your face immediately lighting up seeing them not too far from where the graduates are exiting. It took almost everything in you not to run in excitement when you were finally able to make it towards them.

"Congratulations, honey!" Your parents are first to engulf you in a hug, the rest of the group close behind. You chuckle as two smaller bodies take your legs, none other than Niyuki and Mizuki claiming each side.

"Congratulations, Mommy!" Niyuki grins up at you.

"Thank you, Niyuki." You lean down to kiss her on the forehead and do the same for Mizuki.

"Do I get a kiss too?"

You look up at the inquisitor, a grin sprouting out on your face as you stand back up. "Of course."

He pulls you in and gives you a kiss, the action getting a mix of responses to the show of affection. Katsuki presents to you a beautifully arranged bouquet along with a promise that there were a lot more gifts back at his place.

Most days in the past you prayed for times like this, but now you were happy you didn't have to anymore.

    all rights reserved © do NOT steal, alter or copy this work.

[tkwrites]

I can't belive you're here. - Quinn Hughes x ofc

Photo from Pinterest

Title: I can't believe you're here.

Author: Tory / @tkwrites 

Relationship: Quinn Hughes x Sarah Roberts

Warnings: Unprotected sex - p in v (wrap it up unless you’re in a consenting relationship!), Captain kink unlocked, oral & fingering (f receiving), squirting, swearing, surprise visit, if I missed anything, please let me know.

Summary: After a very long time apart due to bad timing, Sarah surprises Quinn on the road. Wearing his jersey, she fulfills one of his long harbored fantasies. The night just gets better when he sees what she has on underneath. 

Word Count: 6,000

Comments:

Hoo boy. This is by far the most depraved thing I’ve written. I hope you all enjoy it as much as I enjoyed writing it!

If you did enjoy it, please let me know! Your comments and questions inspire me to keep writing!

To the lovely anon who requested this: I hope it lives up to your expectations. I had so much fun writing it.

Anonymous asked: 'In some ways, he’d love to see his name across her back, but not at a game.' Ohhh, I'd love to see something about this in the future. Later on in their relationship, he's on a roadie and not seen Sarah for 4 weeks due to it and some study trip prior. He has just played either Brady or his brothers who noticed he's really down and missing her, they call Sarah and organise to fly her to his next destination to suprise him after the game. She's waiting in his hotel room, wearing nothing but his jersey to cheer him up after a loss 😉 Or a more wholesome storyline of her first WAG jacket or something aha Absolutely love all your pieces and can't wait to continue reading of their universe xx

I can't believe you're here.

A Quinn & Sarah Snapshot

Fatigue and failure were deep in his bones as he walked into the hotel. 

Logically, Quinn knew winning streaks always come to an end. It was impossible to have a perfect 82 game season. No one had ever come close to that. 

It didn't matter how much he tried to reason, it still felt like shit to be on the receiving end of a shut out after two straight losses. 

The fact that they were still on the road didn’t help. The fourteen day trek away from home was always terrible, no matter when it fell in the season, but having it come right after Sarah had to be at a conference was torture. It meant he hadn’t seen her in over 12 days. 

It was terrible timing. The day after he got back from the six day Midwest road trip, she left for a seven day ocean conservation conference in Costa Rica. She got back two days after he had to leave again. 

It had been nineteen long days since he'd seen her for more than fifteen hours. 

They talked and sent messages and photos, but it wasn’t the same as talking face to face and kissing her and feeling her skin and smelling her perfume. 

He’d learned from the past and brought her pillowcase with him, but even that was beginning to smell less and less like her.

He only had to get through three more games and five and a half more days before he'd be back home and in her arms. 

One of the team assistants ran up to him in the lobby, “Hughes,” he said, a little breathless, “they changed your room.” 

“What?” he asked, trying to pull himself from his misery and back to the present.

“They had to change your room. Something about the heater being broken,” Sean said. 

“Okay. Petey still with me?” 

“No, they had to separate you,” Sean forced the key into his hand as they stepped on the elevator, “I already moved your bags.” 

He’d slept four quick hours in a room that felt perfectly fine before heading to the pre-game meeting and meal. He couldn’t remember if he’d left his stuff all over the bathroom counter. Hopefully, Sean didn’t have to go through too much trouble. Quinn definitely owed him dinner. 

The room was dark when he walked in. And it smelled like… it smelled like Sarah’s smoky vanilla perfume. 

Fuck. He missed her so much, his mind was playing tricks on him. 

At least he would have a room to himself, and could call her in peace without the threat of Petey listening in. They could probably even get some phone sex in, which hadn’t happened for far too long. 

Then, he would get a full night's sleep before their flight to Chicago. That, in itself, was a rare luxury he was outrageously thankful for. 

When he flipped on the light, the first thing he noticed was the king size bed. The bedspread was mussed, as if someone had been lying on it. Strange for any hotel, but especially one this nice. Rooms he came into often looked so pristine, it was as if no one had ever stepped foot in them before. 

He pushed the worry out of his mind and started toward the bathroom. 

“Hey.” 

Great, now he was hallucinating. It sounded like Sarah was right behind him. He must be more tired than he thought. 

“Quinn?” 

He stopped dead in his tracks, backpack nearly slipping to the floor. If he turned and she wasn’t here, he didn’t know what he’d do. 

A touch grazed his shoulder, and a strong whiff of her perfume made his knees shake. “Sarah?” he asked, hoping against hope. Why would she be here? 

“Yeah,” she said. 

He turned and felt a strange, strangled sort of gasp escape his throat. 

Sarah was in his hotel room. She was here. She was in Boston. How was she here? 

When his brain finally reconciled the fact that she was actually in front of him, he noticed she was wearing his flying skate jersey. 

“I - how?” 

She smiled softly, set his backpack aside and wrapped her arms around him.  

His body caught on before his brain did, hugging her against him fiercely.

Coming home from her conference in Costa Rica, which had been lovely but incredibly socially exhausting, all Sarah had wanted was to fall into bed with Quinn. When she came home to a dark and empty house, it had been a rude reminder he was on the longest road trip of the year. The apartment felt too big without him in it, especially for so long. 

“I missed you so much,” she said into his neck. 

“How did you do this?” he finally asked.

He’d known other players' wives and girlfriends occasionally showed up on road trips, but generally, their partners always knew, and it was usually because they were close by one of their hometowns. 

“Brady called me. He said you were so sad and not yourself on Wednesday, he wanted to do something. So he bought me a ticket and called Brock to get the schedule.” 

He sniffed and she pulled back.

“Oh, Quinn,” she said upon seeing the tears pooled in his eyes.

“I’m just…” The shock of seeing her brought all his emotion up to the surface.

“I know,” she said, pulling him into her again, feeling a few tears slip down her own cheeks. It felt so good to hold him.  

His mouth landed on her neck. It was a comforting thing to taste her skin as they embraced. He mumbled something against her. 

“Sorry?” she asked, trying to pull away so she could see his face. 

He didn’t want to let her go, not even for a second. Instead, he lifted his lips just enough so he could repeat, “I missed you so much.” 

“I know Quinny,” she said, running her fingers into his hair. “I missed you, too, but I’m here now, and we have all night.” 

His mouth was still on her neck, though he’d started moving with more intent, licking and kissing. The shock to his system was giving way to relief and desire. 

Finally fed up with his teasing, Sarah took his jaw in her hands and forced his head up so she could kiss him. 

He sighed into it, and found some way to pull her tighter against him. 

Somewhere in the back of his mind, he knew she was wearing his jersey, but the shock of her in his hotel room, seeing her face and her blue eyes and her lips - god her lips, he couldn't get enough of them - stole all of his brain power. Now, as his hands splayed across her back, feeling the numbers patched and stitched there, the reality of it hit him. 

Forcing himself to break away so he could look at her, his knees threatened to buckle when he noticed she wasn’t wearing anything else - not that he could see anyway. The fabric hit her upper thigh, leaving much of her legs bare.

“I -” he tried to say something, but lost the words. 

The idea of wearing his jersey came from Emma. Sarah thought it was cheesy, but Emma assured her he’d love it. She’d surprised Brady at the end of a roadtrip like that, and “I swear his brain, like, short-circuited or something. He just stood there, staring at me for like 30 seconds before he went wild.” 

It didn’t surprise her Quinn didn’t have the same immediate reaction. He was so much quieter than Brady, and from what she could tell, they had a much more subdued relationship than the Tkachuks. 

The way he was looking at her now, though - like she was the thing he'd been anxiously waiting for on Christmas morning - made it all worthwhile.  

“I borrowed it, I hope that’s okay.” 

“Yeah,” he breathed. 

When they were apart, the mechanics of an orgasm could be there, but it just wasn't as good. It could never be. She missed feeling him: his skin, his breath, the rigid length of him inside her.

It wasn’t that she’d been hoping he’d ravish her right away (okay, maybe she had been, but she knew Quinn, and knew he would never react that way), but all this looking without any touching was getting out of hand. Impatience was pulling tight through her stomach. The prospect of finally feeling fulfilled was driving her crazy.

She needed to give him a little nudge. 

Leaning in, she let her lips graze his ear, down to his jaw and then back. He made a soft, breathy noise, and she knew she almost had him.

Just one more push. 

“How do you want me?” she asked, following it up with a slow, open mouthed kiss to the soft spot under his ear. 

Blood rushed from his head so fast he felt dizzy. 

“I want you to ride me in this,” he managed to say, fingering the stripes on the sleeve. 

It was a fantasy he'd harbored since middle school, but had yet to experience. He'd asked his college girlfriend once, and she had scoffed, telling him it would get too hot, which he thought was a strange argument considering a jersey was designed to do the exact opposite. 

Sarah didn’t acknowledge his request other than to start popping open the buttons of his shirt, one after the other. That set him into motion, tugging at his clothing. He couldn’t get it off fast enough. 

Through a jumble of arms and hands, tangling in their effort to get him naked, they found themselves on the bed. Quinn flat on his back, breath heavy with anticipation, and Sarah astride him, trying to game plan her next move. She had on lingerie he’d never seen before and didn’t want it to go to waste, but he wanted her in the jersey, and she couldn’t take anything off without spoiling the surprise. 

He grew impatient as she debated, shifting his hips up, trying to entice her onto him already. “Sarah,” he whined. 

Finally, she decided to just move it to the side, and sink onto him. The stretch after so long was a pleasant burn. 

His eyes rolled back, and his hips jumped, wanting to fill her more. 

“How are you so wet?” he asked. They hadn’t kissed for that long. Usually, it took a little more to get her this soaked. 

A wicked smile spread over her face, “I may have gotten myself off while I was waiting, thinking about finally seeing you again.”

“Fuck.” 

She was a vision. Riding him after so long? Wearing his jersey? Confessing to touching herself in this bed thinking of and waiting for him? He was the luckiest man on the planet. 

She pitched forward to get the right angle, and moaned, loud and earnest. Good thing they moved him two floors up from the team. 

He tried to brace himself, but the fantasy of it, of her being here and wearing his jersey - the golden C winking at him, reminding him of all the work he'd done to get here - knowing his name was on her back made him groan out loud. His restraint stretched until it was paper thin. 

His hands explored under the jersey only to feel something smooth tied at her hip and lace at her ribcage. 

He coughed, “are you wearing lingerie?” 

“Just for you,” she said, meeting his heated gaze with a coy smile. 

He didn’t think this could get any better. Now, his mind was wild with possibilities. 

“Come for me and I'll show you.”

Holy shit. 

The little control he had snapped and he flooded her with a loud groan of her name.

Sarah's hands traced his arms, entwining their fingers before guiding them to rest on either side of his head as she leaned forward to kiss him. 

His chest pressed into hers, catching the scratchy logo on his jersey as he tried to catch his breath. “You’re incredible, you know that?”

Shaking her head, she pushed herself off of him to go to the bathroom. She needed to clean up and readjust before the next part of her plan could move forward.

He lay there and tried to wrap his mind around what had just happened. It was almost too fast for him to remember the way he wanted. The bathroom door opened, and he looked over.

“Alright, captain,” she said, leaning on the door frame. She felt incredibly silly, but relished the way his eyes widened at the nickname, “are you ready to see what I have for you?” 

Oh God. 

He nodded, though he wasn’t sure how he could possibly be prepared for what was coming. 

“Do you want to, or should I?” she asked, fiddling with the hem of his jersey, exposing the little heart tattooed on her thigh. 

“You can.” His voice squeaked a little as he said it, and he blushed. 

Being sexy wasn’t really in her forte, but Sarah tried her best. Lifting the jersey over her head, she thought briefly about tossing it in his face. Deciding that was a step too far, she let it fall to the floor. 

Quinn gaped. 

Most of the time, Sarah wore cotton briefs - occasionally she switched them for lace or a thong, but this was something totally different than what he was used to seeing her in.

For one, the matching set was so sheer, he could see her nipples through the swirling pattern of the black lace. Then, there was the fact that it was obviously made to be removed. The bra tied in front and her underwear tied at the hips, each with a silky black ribbon, like she was a gift for him to unwrap. 

His mind ran away with the thought of tugging the bow on her bra undone with his teeth. 

When she did a little twirl so he could see the back, the breath knocked out of his lungs. She looked so damn good, she might just kill him. His heart might just explode. 

“What do you think?” she asked, walking closer. She could already see how much he liked it in his wide eyes and panting mouth, but she wanted to hear him say it. 

“I -” He didn't know it was possible to get hard so soon after coming. 

“Do you like it, Captain?” 

His breathing hitched. He never thought he'd have a captain kink, but hearing the title come out of her mouth while she was wearing that? He might just develop one. 

Adjusting the bows at her hips so they sat more naturally, Sarah looked at him and repeated, “do you like it, Quinn?” 

“Fuck,” he breathed. “Yes. I love it.” 

She smiled and climbed onto the bed then straddled him. His hands went to her waist of their own volition.

Her hips ground down. 

“You can’t do that,” he said, teeth gritted as he forced the words over a moan. The soft texture of the lace against his cock was incredible. 

“What?” 

“You can’t ride me again. I won’t last and you haven’t come yet.” 

She leaned down so her mouth was inches from his, her breath making him hyper aware of his own mouth and how much he wanted it on her. 

“And what are you going to do about that, Captain Hughes?” 

He topped her so fast that Sarah grunted and let out a little giggle when her back slammed into the mattress. 

“Sorry,” he breathed, only half meaning it as he planted a wet kiss at the base of her throat. He moved down her chest, following the outline of her bra with his mouth. He almost made good on his fantasy of biting it open, but held off. He wanted to watch her fall apart with it on. 

“What were you thinking about when you were getting yourself off?” he asked, kissing over her tattoo. 

“You,” she panted. 

“And what were you imagining me doing?” 

She whined. 

“What was I doing, Sarah?” he asked, lifting his mouth from where he’d just kissed down to the band of her panties. 

“You were eating me out,” she confessed, a blush rising high on her cheeks. 

Sometimes, he wished she would have told him how much she fantasized about and enjoyed oral sex before the first time he’d done it. There were four solid months he could have been pleasing her he would never get back. 

He smirked a little, “is that what you want now?” 

“Yes.”

“Yes what?” he asked, tracing his fingers up and down her thighs. 

“Yes, Quinn.” 

He tutted, “Yes, what?” he asked as his lips went to her inner thigh. 

The bolt of electricity that fractured up her spine tipped her voice into a high, breathy whimper.

When she didn’t answer, he repeated the question again, ghosting his fingers against the lace of her panties. 

Her hips jumped. “Yes, Captain.” 

Oh, it was definitely a kink now. He couldn’t get over the sound of it coming out of her mouth. 

He made a satisfied noise and hooked two fingers under the lace gusset, pulling it away from her experimentally. The ties pulled taught, but didn't seem to want to slide over her hips. He tugged again, a little harder. 

Flinging a hand down, Sarah grasped the band, “you're going to rip them.”

“I'll buy you more,” he said, almost off handedly, still pulling. 

“Quinn, that's not the point. Please don't.”

The pulling stopped, and he pulled back to look into her face. “Okay. I'm sorry.”

Her face melted into a smile, “thank you.” She reached down to ease the ties over her hips. 

“No,” he breathed. 

Her eyes snapped to his, questioning.

Before she could ask what he wanted instead, he was knocking her hand away and licking one of the ribbons at her left hip into his mouth.

He pulled it away from her with his teeth, eyes growing darker when the bow unraveled and the pieces fell apart. 

Taking his time to kiss and lick his way to the other tie, he repeated the action, and groaned when it also untied so easily. 

He pulled on the whole thing and flung the garment away. It sailed somewhere across the room, ties flailing. 

Sarah bought this set because it was cute and sort of reminiscent of her black bikini he liked so much. She didn't realize what a fetish he would have for the bows. 

Settling back between her legs, she whined as he parted her lips and blew on her hot core. Shivers ran up her spine and down to all her fingers and toes.

“What were you thinking about?” 

“What do you mean?” 

“When you were touching yourself, what were you thinking about me doing?” 

“You were eating me out,” she repeated, confused. 

His laugh chuffed a burst of hot air against her that had her squirming.

“I mean how. What exactly was I doing? 

“You want me to describe it to you?”

“I want to do it for you,” he confessed, voice gravelly. 

She made a little squeaking noise that told him how much that idea excited her.

“Tell me how you want me to touch you,” he said before he leaned in to press his tongue against her, just to feel her twitch. 

Something inside her broke. Even though she felt depraved at the very thought of telling him this, it was too late to go back. The possibility of feeling it had taken over her body and wouldn’t let it go. 

“You had your fingers on my g-spot,” she breathed. 

“How many?” 

She squirmed again.

“How many, Sarah?” he repeated, circling her entrance, enthralled at the way she flexed.  

“Two.” Her mind made her continue and she squeaked, “then three.” 

His eyes widened and shot to hers. “Will they fit?” 

She nodded. “If you get me off first, they should.” 

His eyes were blown dark and full of mischief when he glanced down then back up to meet hers again. “And how was I using my mouth?” 

She moaned out loud just thinking about it. “You were doing that suck and flick thing with your tongue.” 

He had no idea what she meant.

He'd done it before: the night they'd been eliminated from the finals last season, but she couldn't very well bring that up. I want you to eat me out the way you did when you'd had one of the worst nights of your career? There was no way. Maybe if she demonstrated...

“I can show you,” she said, grasping one of his shoulders, “I need a part of you.” 

He toyed for a moment with the idea of presenting her his dick, but if he did that, he wouldn’t want to stop feeling her mouth, which defeated the whole purpose of this. Instead, he crawled over her and tipped his head to expose the column of his throat. 

His eyes rolled back as her open mouth connected with his hypersensitive skin. She ran her tongue over his pulse, following it with her bottom lip, before ending with suction, and a flick with the tip of her tongue.

Moaning, he ground against her hot center when she did it again and again.

He wrenched himself away before he could follow through with his desires to sheath himself and take her any way she would let him. 

Settling back onto his stomach, he shook his head to get back into the right frame of mind before leveling his gaze with her perfect, pretty pearl again. 

He tried to follow the movement of her mouth, and her hips jumped at the feeling. 

“Quinn,” she whined as he eased two fingers into her, curling them against that sensitive spot. “Oh my god.”

He continued on. She could feel the movement of his chin, up and down and in and out with each pass of his tongue. 

“Harder,” she begged. 

He dug his fingers into her soft spot even more. 

Throwing her head back, she moaned loudly. “Oh my god, Quinn. Just like that. Don't stop. Please don't stop.” 

Like he would ever stop when she was at his mercy like this. Grinding into the mattress, he continued on, moaning at the way her body undulated as she moved with him. 

She let out a gasping noise as if someone had forced all the air out of her in one swift hit. Her core began to pulse around his fingers, trying to suck them deeper inside her. 

Tipping her chin back, Sarah sighed as wave after soft wave of pleasure crashed over her.

When she stopped contracting so tightly, he waited until one of her aftershocks passed to work another finger into her. 

Her voice echoed around the hotel room as she cried out. 

He said a silent prayer of thanks to whoever had the wherewithal to separate them from the team. There was no way he wanted anyone, let alone someone who knew them, to overhear this.

“So good, Quinn,” she croaked out. “Feels so full.”

He continued kissing her bundle of nerves the way she wanted, pausing every few passes to suck a little more intensely. 

A surge of pleasure coiled low in her belly, winding tighter and tighter until every breath ended in a moan. She felt so full and stretched open. So… Alive. All other thoughts fell out of her brain except Quinn and his silver tongue and wicked fingers. 

Feeling as if she might just shatter to pieces if she didn't get some relief, Sarah moaned and panted and begged, “please, Quinn. Please.”

She had no idea what she was asking for, but the waves of pleasure kept coming and coming until it was winding up her spine and pulling so tight, she thought it might just wrench every vertebrae apart and fill each gap with the soft promise of her impending release. 

He could feel her high building and kept urging her up the slope. Anxious for her summit, he sealed his mouth to her, milking her clit like her orgasm might just satiate his hunger.

“Quinn,” she gasped, spine arching as her hands abandoned her nipples and rummaged for some way to ground herself. One ended up in his hair, and the other fisted into the bedspread. “Oh my god. I think I'm gonna…” 

Her voice dissolved into a noise he'd never heard her make as her muscles locked around his fingers. He forced them to continue, working through her orgasm. 

Quite suddenly, as pleasure whirled through her veins, a feeling, intense and ferocious, swelled within her.  

As a tsunami of white-hot ecstasy crashed over her, he unlocked a space deep within her she didn't even know existed.

“Oh, fuck! Quinn!”

Something molten erupted in her belly like a long dormant volcano. 

Vaguely, she heard him groan as if every fantasy he'd ever had was being fulfilled. 

Though he knew women could, he’d never seen it in person, never even imagined what feeling her release gush over his hand would be like.

Sometime last season, Beauvillier had gone on and on about making his girl squirt, and Quinn remembered wishing he would keep it to himself. He didn't want to think about that every time he saw them together. 

Now, having experienced it first hand, he understood why Tito wanted to tell everyone he knew. 

Pleasure continued to ripple through her. No high had ever gone on this long. It eased away the tension that had knotted up in her body, until all at once, sensitivity and overstimulation set in.

“Too much, too much,” she croaked, trying to squirm away from his touch. 

He’d been so mesmerized watching her face, he hadn't realized his fingers were still moving. They uncoiled and stilled, and she melted into the mattress as a sigh melted from her lips. 

Her chest rose and fell steeply, the tie of her bra pulling taught with every heavy inhale, making the cups ride up the swell of her breasts. God, she was so beautiful.

It took quite a while for her to come down. He gently eased his fingers out only after she stopped pulsing. 

A whine escaped her throat at the sudden emptiness. 

Slowly coming back to herself, Sarah registered something wet underneath her. 

“Oh my god,” she breathed. “Did I -” her eyes darted to his as her face flushed with the reality of what had just happened, “did you make me squirt?” 

“Yeah," he said, crawling over her again, "and it was the hottest fucking thing I've ever seen in my life.”

The embarrassment she felt at making such a mess ebbed away with his confession. 

“No one's ever done that to me before. I haven't even been able to.” 

A look of immense pride took over his face. “Did you like it? I mean, it seemed like you liked it.” 

She nodded, “I've never felt anything like it.” 

He brought his lips to hers, and the taste of herself on his tongue made her passion throb to life again. 

“Well, Captain,” she said a little while later, smiling at the way his jaw slackened and eyelids grew heavy at the title. “I think I've got one more round in me. What do you want?” 

He twitched against her. 

“I just want you,” he brought his mouth to her neck. “Want to feel you come on my cock,” he murmured into her skin.

“I think we can arrange for that,” she said, fingers winding into his hair. 

Bracing up on his elbows, his gaze fell to her bra. 

Instead of using his mouth, he twirled one of the ribbons around his finger and pulled gently to ease the bow undone. It fell apart, revealing a knot in the middle. 

“It kept coming undone,” Sarah confessed, hands coming up to help him with the knot, which had pulled incredibly tight amidst her heavy breathing and writhing around.

“I think it's stuck. I can't get it out while it's on me, anyway,” she said, raising her arms above her head. “Here.”

At least he'd been able to remove her bottoms the way he wanted. He eased the lace over the swell of her breasts and helped her lift it off. 

He made love to her the way he did whenever he got home from a long time away - earnestly and full of wonder, compliments falling from his lips like raindrops, as if they didn’t cost a thing.  

“Fuck, Sarah, you feel so good.” 

“I can't believe you're mine.” 

“You're so pretty. I can't stop looking at you.”

“God, I'm so lucky.”  

They didn’t cost him anything, but they made Sarah feel like she was worth a million dollars.

“I love that sound,” he murmured when she gasped in pleasure and followed it with a low moan.  

As he drove into her again and again, he shuttered and moaned, feeling like she was going to shatter him into a million little pieces

He'd been hot all night. A sheen of sweat had spread over his skin as soon as she'd climbed on top of him in his jersey. The prospect of a fantasy being fulfilled sending his body into a frenzy. Working her up to that intense high hadn't been a walk in the park either. He'd been on edge and so focused. Now, he felt like his body was on fire.

She felt and sounded and looked so good. He couldn't think of anything but her.

When she tipped her face to the side with a loud moan, he attacked her jaw and neck with his lips, desperate to taste her again. 

She was here. She was in Boston. She was here, in his hotel, in Boston. He just made her squirt, and he didn't have to be down to the bus until 10 the next morning. He must have been doing something right.  

When he felt her fall apart around his cock, he breathed through it and hung on for dear life, twitching with the bliss of it.

Coming down from her high, Sarah was mesmerized by him. The defined set of his jaw, the sweaty sheen to his skin, how his curls fell over his forehead.

“You're so handsome, Quinn.”

She knew he was holding on, hoping to urge another high from her, but she didn't have one to give him. It was time to send him over the edge. 

Propping up on her elbows, she traced her mouth along his jaw up to his ear. He let out a panicked little whimper. 

“Want to feel you,” she whispered. "Want you to fill me up."

His hips stuttered.

“Come for me, Captain.” 

White spots blipped in his vision and he had no choice but to obey. 

Her name fell from his mouth like a prayer as she pulled him over the edge. 

When they walked back in the room after showering, Sarah realized just how much of a mess she'd made of the bed. There was no way they could sleep in it as it was. 

“Oh no.” 

“What?” Quinn asked, lowering the towel he was running over his hair. 

“We need new sheets and housekeeping is going to know exactly what we've been doing.”

“No they won't.”

She pointed to the bed, “you want to tell me they're not going to know we weren't just having sex?”

He laughed, “fine. So they might know. What does it matter? It's not like we know any of them.”

“It's so embarrassing.”

“What is? That your boyfriend made you come so hard you squirted?”

“No,” she was blushing though, “I mean…no. That was amazing.”

“So what's the worry?”

“I just…I don't want anyone else to see.”

He laughed, “that's fair. I can just ask them to bring some extra bedding. No one has to come into the room.”

She nodded, “okay.”

He called the desk, and despite his insistence he would prefer to make the bed himself, the hotel sent someone up anyway. 

Sarah folded the comforter before hiding in the bathroom. 

Quinn noticed the housekeeper's eyes lingering in one corner of the room. When he glanced over, he saw Sarah’s panties from where he'd thrown them, ties scrawled over the carpet like calligraphy strokes. So much for being discreet.

After giving the woman a tip, he tucked them in Sarah's suitcase before letting her know the coast was clear. 

As they settled into bed, Quinn relished holding her close.

Before sleep could overtake her completely, Sarah needed to set something straight. 

“I hope you know that Captain thing is only for special occasions. There is no way I'm calling you Captain all the time.”

“That’s fine,” he said, laughing. “Makes it more special when you do.”

“To be fair, I didn’t expect you to like it so much,” she said. 

She’d called him Captain as a kind of joke, and half expected him to tell her not to do it again. Quinn didn’t even like pet names. She vividly remembered the way he grimaced the first (and last) time she called him baby.

He ran his fingers through her soft hair. “I don’t know that I would have either. I’ve never had that happen before. You said it, and it went straight to my dick. I think your lingerie had something to do with that.” 

She propped herself up on an elbow. “You liked the lingerie?” she teased, full well knowing the answer. 

He scoffed, “I'm going to dream about it for the rest of this damn road trip.” 

Giggling, she leaned down to kiss him. “Maybe I'll have it on when you get home,” she said against his mouth. 

He groaned, “don't joke about that.” 

“Why not? Wouldn't it give you something to look forward to?” 

“I always look forward to coming home to you.” 

She looked down at him for a long time, memorizing the love in his eyes. “I love you, Captain Hughes,” she said before lowering her mouth to his to tell him that way too. 

“Tease,” he chided when she pulled away. 

She smiled and settled back, laying her head on his chest. 

“I love you, too,” he whispered into her hair before they fell asleep. “I can't believe you're here.”

The next morning, Sarah put his jersey back on and put his morning hard on to good use - slower this time so he could remember it properly.

After room service breakfast and a very steamy shower, he walked her down to the lobby to catch her car to the airport. 

“I love you,” he said, kissing her forehead.

“I love you too.”

“Thank you for coming.” 

“You're welcome. You should really be thanking Brady, though.”

He watched her pull away before heading back to his room to pack his bag. 

On the elevator ride, Quinn did just as Sarah suggested. 

Love you man. I owe you big time. 

Want more Quinn & Sarah? Check out the Snapshots Masterlist

To read all my fics, check out the Fanfiction Masterlist

[mindfulstudyquest]

❥﹒♡﹒☕﹒𝘀𝘁𝘂𝗱𝘆 𝘁𝗶𝗽𝘀 𝘁𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝗮𝗰𝘁𝘂𝗮𝗹𝗹𝘆 𝗺𝗮𝗸𝗲 𝗺𝗲 𝗽𝘂𝘁 𝗺𝘆 𝗮𝘀𝘀 𝗼𝗻 𝗮 𝗰𝗵𝗮𝗶𝗿 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝘀𝘁𝘂𝗱𝘆

organization: i know it's the most trivial advice in the world, but i swear it works. before doing anything, i take my planner and review everything i have to do, i divide the study by subject, amount of things to study and review spaces for exams. realistically, you can't expect to do it all in one day, but a good plan could almost allow you to sleep at night!

a clean workspace: i can't fucking concentrate if there's a mess aroud me, i get distracted easily, even by dust, so before i start studying i always deep-clean my desk. i know that not everyone can afford a personal and quiet place to study in their houses, so try to find yourself a small angle where you can really focus.

go to study in a library / café: i didn't believe it at first, but it's actually useful. if you have the opportunity to go to a library or a café after school ( or near your house ) do so. being surrounded by people who are studying like you really helps to focus, you'll be less inclined to get distracted and procastinate. i would feel uncomfortable using my phone in a library with other people who are doing their work while i'm sitting there scrolling on tumblr.

breaks: ik ik, not very blair waldrof, hermione granger, spencer hastings, rory gilmore of me, isn't it? but is it worth it. sometimes i end up having really bad headaches from studying and, even if i keep studying, the quality of my work decreases significantly. breaks are fundamental. i would not recommend using social networks for your beak, because they litteraly drain your attention, rather do your skincare, prepare yourself a snack ( eating is important! it's what makes you focus ), read 10 pages of your book, dance a little bit in your room, do stretching, go outside and buy some mint chewingum, something like that.

EAT!: girls, boys and theys, we know. i honestly think that almost every person that craves academic validation ends up developing a sort of eating disorder. it's not even the food, is the fact that you are too busy studying that you forget to eat, ignoring stomach cramps, or the fact that you didn't get that answer right and now you don't feel like you deserve the lunch. i understand bc i AM like this, like you. but think about it: you need to do it in order to survive ( but this is secondary to the grades, right? ) and to keep your brain active. you can't walk around with blurred vision because you haven't eaten or drunk for fourteen continuous hours. i swear that eating like a normal human being helps you to keep going.

sleep: same thing as eating, but with our terrible sleeping schedules. i know that school is toxic so we end up finishing our homeworks at 2 am everyday ( if we're lucky ) but when you have the chance, take a nap and recover.

repeat things as if you were explaining them to someone: this is litterally the fastest way ever to learn fundamental concepts when you're studying. imagine that you're talking to a friend that doesn't know anything about the subject that you're studying and try to explain the topic to them. finding simple words for a difficult topic will help you understand it thoroughly, on this basis you can then build an articulated and more academic speech. repeat things out loud, doesn't matter if you look crazy, you already are <3

check and organize your notes the same day: i never have time to take proper notes in class, so i review them as soon as possible, with the lesson still fresh in mind. it really helps me understand the subject and makes the further study much easier.

watch youtube videos: youtube is my favourite class. sometimes teachers are dumber than students and you, who don't have a degree in that subject and are tackling a topic for the first time, don't understand a damn thing. ofc not!! sometimes professors are terrible at explaining stuff, but fazal from pakistan isn't. i passed my physics class with a 10/10 thanks to an indian guy on youtube. documentaries and yt videos are a simple and nice way to understand better topics and do insights for extra credits.

delete social media: i'm gonna do another post specifically for this.

"STUDY!" wallpaper: last but not least, the dumbest yet the smartest advice, set as lockscreen a white / black / whatever background with a big fat "STUDY!" written on it. everytime you're about to pick up your phone and procastinate the wallpaper will scold you.

hope this was useful or at least fun to read byee

[thehollowwriter]

I think we should talk more about the mysgony when it comes to parents in media, and how fathers are favoured and praised for the most the most basic shit while mothers are demonised for making mistakes or being bad. This is gonna be a long one, buckle up.

I hate Mrs Rosehearts as much as the next guy, but it's unfair that Mr Rosehearts is not given similar criticism for allowing his wife to treat Riddle the way he does. I hardly see people bring him up apart from mentioning that Riddle's parents probably have an unhappy marriage, and some people say something along the lines of "poor Mr Rosehearts, struggling with a wife like that".

Of course, we don't know enough about his character to gauge how Mrs Rosehearts treats him, bit it's clear he just passively stands to the side when it comes to whatever Mrs Rosehearts wants to do with Riddle. That itself is very harmful and it's own form of abuse, imo.

The same applies to Alador Blight from the Owl House. He's praised for being a wonderful dad that finally came through and stood up to his "horrible wretched bitch of a wife" (who, if she was a guy, would probably have more people analysing her and trying to find ways to sympathise with her just saying)..

And while, yes, he did stand up to her and that's a good thing, the general consensus is he was a brilliant dad from the start that was held back by his wife's wicked ways. But... that's not true? His first appearance is him telling Amity to stop being friends with Willow. He ignores his children constantly, and, like Mr Rosehearts, stands passively to the side when Odaliah treats her children like her property.

He's a neglectful parent at best and just as concerned with image and status at Odaliah at worst. But... that stuff is just forgotten. Most people just say "we thought he was bad but it turns out he was manipulated by his wife". He is HIS OWN PERSON. You cannot just blame everything on his "evil manipulative wife" (which is also smt that sometimes happens irl when both parents are abusive). He is still fully capable of making his own decisions.

And again, it's unfortunate, but if Odaliah were to be given his treatment or if Alador were a woman, the general response would be "That's sad but not an excuse! I can't believe she was forgiven!"

The worst I can think of atm, is Silco and Vi from Arcane. Now ofc they're not married. But the circumstances are similar.

Silco is praised to the high heavens for being one of the best dads in animation (#1 goes to Doofenshmirtz ofc, which I agree with) and the reasons for this are because he... shows his care, puts Jinx first, and loves her. Wow. Fucking groundbreaking am I right. The bar is soooo high/s

The thing is, Jinx is a child soldier. She works for Silco, protects his shipments of Shimmer, takes out the enemies that need taken out, etc. He found her as a young child, and when we cut to the present, she's murdering people without so much as flinching, even delighting in it, and suffering badly from trauma and hallucinations.

Obviously, Jinx was not given the care she needed, and was instead trained to assist Silco.

Am I denying Silco loves her? Of course not! He clearly does. But that's just not good enough. He's a loving dad, but not a good one. He's not the father that neither Jinx nor Powder needed.

Meanwhile, we have Vi. Vi loves Powder, protects her, cares for her, tries to keep her out of harm, stands up for her, and so on. She cares so deeply for Powder, and you can see it. The moment she got out of prison, her first goal was to find Powder.

However, because she hit Powder once, and shouted at her, she's apparently an abusive monster who never cared about Powder. Reminder, she hit Powder because her entire family was killed in front of her and then she learned Powder was the reason that happened. She was like... 14? And she immediately left to calm down. She did not abandon Powder, she left to take a breather because she realised she was too angry. And when she came back, she was drugged and arrested.

Silco is a grown adult who purposefully flooded the streets of the Undercity with a highly addictive drug, turned Powder into a soldier, and is generally a terrible person, even if he is a three dimensional amd well written antagonist.

Vi started the story as a teenager suffering poverty and discrimination just like Silco, had to deal with her own parents death, then her adoptive family was killed in front of her, and then she was forcefully taken from her sister. And yet, people are convinced Vi is a terrible and abusive sister who never loved Powder?

The only example worse than this, methinks, is Stella and Stolas from Helluva Boss.

Stella is a shitty mother who ignores her daughter, which the the audience is shown via a scene were Octavia is having a nightmare and she tells Stolas to deal with it. She frequently screams and swears at Stolas and throws things at him, with no regard for her daughter's presence or feelings.

This is pretty terrible, right? Of course! Everyone knows Stella is a horrible mother.

Stolas on the other hand, is praised for being such an loving and caring father, who tries his best. He even has a song with Octavia!

Well, he also: openly talks about having sex with Blitz and how much he likes it while she was right there, told her people want her money and her body, generally doesn't pay much attention to her either bc he's wallowing about Blitz not loving him back, and doesn't give her feelings much regard.

And yet, the misogyny extends beyond just Stella because people generally agree that Octavia is ungrateful and doesn't appreciate Stolas enough. They get mad at her for disliking the fact that Stolas is cheating on her mother with an imp who's been nothing but rude to her and ruining their family further, and even mock her for feeling unloved. Hell even Brandon, one of the creators, has allegedly recently called her a "cockblocking slut" which, frankly, is a disgusting thing to say about a 17 year old girl.

Idk man I'm just tired.

[skele-bunny]

Thinking about Phantom's first times.......... Rain/Phantom & Swiss/Phantom under cut

(Mild CW - Medium implications of past assault)

I'm a firm believer that Phantom never experienced like.. Genuine, consenting sex until he became Topside. Seeing the pack having sex in the open absolutely freaked him out cause their mind processes it as "Oh fuck, X is hurting Z." And would cry over it.

It took him a while to finally understand the difference, and eventually he had sex on his own terms. Phantom was the closest to Swiss, and trusted him the most, so ofc he asked Swiss to be his first.

Swiss made sure to go all out! Petals on the bed, warm oil massage, candles, even giving Phantom a nice bath beforehand with dinner together privately. The pack was well aware and they wanted to make sure everything went smooth, so they didn't intervene for the entire time like they usually might've with each other.

Phantom just adored it all. Swiss started fingering him and just kept constantly reassuring him, he knew they were nervous even if they didn't say it - their body was. He was slow and gentle with prep, not once saying something crude or teasing.

"You're doing so good, baby bat. You're so damn beautiful..."

Totally went down on his bug, too while fingering him. Licking his cock so professionally - Phantom was his pillow prince and he was gonna make sure they got nothing but special treatment, Phantom didn't have to do anything unless he wanted to.

And ffuucck just the idea of Phantom having to keep eye contact with Swiss as he pushes in bc he needs that reassurance of who's above him. Their thighs trembling but hands cupping Swiss' face to keep grounding himself. It's just so gentle, Swiss reassuring him over and over again, even stopping every now and then when Phantom's tears seemed to be getting too much.

"We can stop if you're in pain or don't want to do this."

Very fucking quickly met back with, "Don't stop, please don't stop... It feels so good, please. I promise I'm okay."

Phantom just loses their absolute mind and is just left a blabbering, moaning mess. Whining Swiss' name, claws dragging down his back before he gets knotted. Then Swiss is all over him again, kissing his face, rubbing his sides with even more praises. He tries to recommend a shower after, but Phantom just wants to cuddle, so they'll do just that.

Now with Rain? Completely different anatomy, completely different story.

He joined his first time in a pack orgy and somehow ended up between Rain's legs after Mountain, and he's just... Sitting there. The water ghoul is giving so many confused and needy trills, looking at Phantom desperately but also completely confused until he suddenly scampers away to the bathroom and Cirrus takes his place without thinking.

They find each other after and Rain is a bit in shambles. Signing a bit frantically, "Did I do something wrong? Do you not like me? It's okay if you do I just want to know." And on and on - even Phantom feels guilty at a point.

He confesses he's never topped before, he doesn't know how to really pleasure Rain. Sure, he can watch the others all day, but he still doesn't understand and doesn't want to do just random stuff. They're more experienced with Rain, he has no damn clue.

Rain just relaxes and can't help but laugh, and they agree to test it out together. They're gently touching one another, Rain having to pull back every now and then to sign to his mate on what to do.

"Just slow back and forth. You'll get more of me on a bit. This is just the foreplay."

Phantom is rubbing Rain through his underwear, but Rain is full on jerking the Quintessence off. It's confusing and feels so amazing. Then he finally becomes a real man (/silly) when Rain directs him on how to eat pussy. Phantom has a decent sized tongue, but still on the smaller side, making him get so face deep between Rain's folds to lick and swallow. His eyes still looking at Rain while he arches his back and is emptily moaning. Learns very quickly how to multitask his tongue and fingers, and it's very much worth it in his eyes.

"You're doing so good, please keep doing that."

Rain totally squirts on his face and Phantom is over the moon about it. He's just purring and trilling, laying his head on Rain's chest while the other combs through their hair - trying to come down from his high.

Eventually he's sat up and directed to push in. Rain doesn't tell Phantom this, but he laughs about it in private, because when they started pushing in their eyes rolled back so damn hard to the point their tail stood straight up. It was both adorable and hilarious.

Slowly thrusting, Phantom just has a semi-death grip on Rain, trying to keep himself still and robotic. He has to listen to Rain literally telling him to ease up and just do what feels most comfortable. Eventually getting into his own rhythm, back to leaning against Rain's chest as he fucks his cunt a bit sloppy but Rain is no where near complaining.

He's not focusing on getting deep like a certain earth and fire ghoul, and definitely not trying to fuck his brains out like a certain multi (not that he minds either of those three.) In fact, it almost reminds him of when he and Mountain are doing a scene for their pet play dynamic, and Mountain is just hunched over his chest and whining while humping into him.

Finally being nudged to lift his head up by Rain for a nice kiss, swallowing all of Phantom's high moans and desperate whines. When his own knot starts dragging, Rain encourages them to knot him - that he wants it. So, Phantom does. He knots someone for the very first time and is a crying mess. It feels so right and so warm - Rain feels so right and so warm. So wet and comfortable, just taking his entire load without an issue.

Rain bringing a hand down to his clit and asking Phantom to grind up for the friction so he can get off, and it's such a lovely sight when his head goes back, neck displayed and body stiffening as he cums again too.

Phantom just nuzzling down and slowly sucking on one of Rain's nipples; Rain thinking he's finally getting the hang of it, looks down and nope. Phantom is asleep doing it.

It takes everything in Rain not to have a cuteness overload, so he just tries to adjust Phantom's legs so he's still not on his knees and sore - rolling them to their side since they're still locked in. Rain is just purring, resting his head between Phantom's horns with his claws going through his hair. It is 10000% still a kit behavior, Phantom has a lot he still hasn't grown out of yet, but Rain honestly doesn't mind. It's comforting for him, too.

Honestly, both experiences open Phantom t a new world of pleasure and he adores it! Still confirms he's a bottom though. Rain doesn't mind - he loves power bottoming his mates. I mean have you SEEN Mountain??? Bro has no issues with letting Phantom be the bottom.

[worfsbarmitzvah]

I've thought about how gentile Abrahamic religions are antisemitic religious colonialism before and it pisses me off a ton and I'm thankful you said it, but now that it's someone besides me saying it, I'm gonna give some criticism (please don't take this personally)

Everything up to Abraham (particularly Adam and Noah) have G-d creating and tending to the entirety of humanity, right?

During Abraham's time, it should stand for something that G-d tends to Hagar and Ishmael, right? Especially since Hagar gives her own name for G-d and He makes a promise to Ishmael that he'll be the father of nations (or something like that). And I think the Prophet Muhammad is supposed to be descended from Ishmael.

And Noahides are a whole Thing in all this too ofc.

But the bigger thing is there are definitely texts and interpretations that take G-d being the G-d of the Hebrews and extend it to Henotheism, but for the Jews who are purely monotheists and say there is truly only one G-d in existence and He belongs only to us, isn't it cruel to totally deny the vast majority of humanity the Divine, especially if He is still their Creator and controls the world(s) they live in?

this whole thing is coming from the assumption that judaism was always monotheistic. it wasn’t. at one point in time we were monolatrous, meaning we only worshipped one g-d but didn’t deny the existence of others. hell, the language used in the torah supports this (the way the text treats egypt’s g-ds being perhaps the most prominent example). hashem has always been our specific g-d, since before the idea emerged that he is the only g-d. our/the world’s perception of him may have since evolved into this idea of one singular deity, but it has not always been that way.

hagar and ishmael still come from our mythology surrounding our particular g-d. the idea then emerged in islam, which was born with the same jewish roots that christianity was, that muslims were descended from ishmael. and, like, i don’t really mind or care about that either way. ishmael’s not a super major figure in our folklore. the story, along others in breishit, genuinely does lend itself to the idea that hashem can be the guardian of many different peoples, families, and nations. and to tell the truth i don’t genuinely have much of a problem with sharing some folklore and roots.

but it NEEDS to be acknowledged where those roots come from. for so much of history, right up until today, christians and muslims have pretended they know our g-d and our folklore and our history better than we do. they have MURDERED us for worshipping our g-d and practicing our customs in OUR way, the way we have been since before their religions and cultures emerged. if the religions that find their roots in our culture were more willing to listen to us, respect us, and learn from us, maybe i’d be less angry. but they’re not. they’ve tried and tried and tried to eradicate us and erase where they came from and make our stuff theirs. i don’t think it has to be like that forever but i don’t think we’re very close to it not being like that as of now.

also, i can’t think of a single cultural mythology that doesn’t have a creation story of some kind. it’s just the kind of thing that societies do when they try to make sense of their place in the grand scheme. the fact that we believe our g-d created the entire world does not actually mean that that story or that g-d belongs to the entire world. the fact that everybody thinks our creation myth applies to and belongs to them is just more evidence of how widely our culture has been co-opted.

there’s nothing we can do to change the fact that our g-d has been made universal (either through the natural evolution of our theology or from colonialism and cultural theft, more likely a combination of both) and i have to be fine with that. sure, fine, the people who have adopted our g-d as their own without actually bothering to understand us at all can outnumber us by orders of magnitude.

but why does our holy city have to also be their holy city? the christians have the vatican and rome and islam has mecca and medina. why do they need jerusalem? why can’t even that just be ours?

again, i have to push this aside and be okay with sharing if i truly want to have peace in our land. and i do, because i love eretz yisrael and yerushalayim more than i hate what has been done to her. the situation has grown so far beyond the injustices i am angry about that it is impossible to right those injustices without creating brand new ones. so i will be okay with sharing our g-d, our texts, and our land. but that doesn’t mean the injustice of it won’t burn like a fire in my heart.