#idk just something i made since i thought i wouldn't have time to make edits today

[lvlyghost]

Hello do you take requests cause I had this idea in my mind but I suck in writing

how bout a ghost x reader where he had a bad day and takes it out on his beloved reader who he's been in a really long relationship with, by starting an argument and maybe saying some really mean and bad things that break the reader. Like the reader is only a shell of herself and completely ruined by ghosts words and just crying or sitting completely still staring off the wall or just staring at nothing just being numb.

What would be interesting is Simons reaction when he realizes the damage that he's done, maybe he would cry/break down idk when he sees the usually happy reader being so dull and almost lifeless yk

But Pleasee don't do this to our hearts and write some comfort and a happy ending please I couldn't handle too much angst❤️😭

The Weight of the World

PAIRINGS: Simon 'Ghost' Riley x F!Reader

SUMMARY: You promised to always lean on each other but sometimes love isn't enough.

WORD COUNT: 1.5k

TW: heavy angst, literally got some mid anxiety writing this🥴 swearing, self-doubt, hurt-comfort and slight fluff towards the end. lmk if i missed any.

A/N: finished this in one sitting lol, also not proofread and poorly edited, i've been having a shitty week so expect more angst lol. meet me in therapy. Enjoy anon!🤍🌟🫶🏻💕

Masterlist✨

You hesitate right outside Simon's studio, the place where he secludes himself from everything and everyone. Ever since he came from his last mission he seemed to be on the edge constantly. The usual softness that he reserved specifically for you was... absent.

Still you wouldn't let that stop you from approaching; having dating him for a few years now let you know so much of that. You knew when he was hurting. When he was sad, angry, jealous or even happy. Little to no people could say that.

Somehow this was different. He wasn't even letting you in, constantly keeping you at arms length and that hurt. How were you supposed to get to him this time? Get him to talk to you?

To look at you again with that same glint in his eyes, the spark that you ignited in him and that won't fade away even years after.

The sound of a chair creaking startles you, the same time the timer in the kitchen goes off. You walk back, turning the oven off, and sticking out the apple pie you so happily baked for both with hopes that you'll get him loosen a bit that dark cloud that's been looming over Simon these past few days.

The door of his studio is yanked open the heavy stomp of his boots resonating across the small apartment you two share, then his bulky frame appears just to grab the keys to his black motorcycle.

"Simon!" You call him, burning your hand in the process. He stills halfway through the living room, waiting for you to say something else. Wetting a cloth hurriedly and wrapping it around the burnt skin.

"I made something for us... maybe," standing behind him you leave a reasonable space between the two. You swallow down hard. "Thought we could have it together and just, you know spend...-"

"I don't have time for that now." His voice is cold and monotone. "Don't wait for me."

"But Si-" he turns on his heels, eyes hard and unyielding. He approaches slowly, making you gulp. "What's gotten into you, Simon?" You fight back the tears, this was the man you loved so dearly, the man you knew loved you back; there was a reason for the golden engagement ring on your left hand. "I..-"

"Fucking hell would you stop that? Please just..." he notices the wetness in your eyes. "I can't do this. Not anymore."

"Whatever it is I promise we can work it out together!" your lips quivered. "Just talk to me!"

"I don't need to talk about anything girl!" He seethes, one finger pointing at you. "Think some cheap counseling with you will make things right? Bloody hell no. Neither some homemade bread, this isn't fucking working and it won't until you learn how the bloody world works."

It breaks your heart into a tiny million pieces, breathing becomes a challenge and the injury in your hand can no longer be felt. Simon's words were worse than any physical pain. Where was the man you loved? The man who used to lift you up and kiss you on the forehead? The man whose hands couldn't stop roaming your body late at night? The man who'd helped you reach out for things he probably put away in the highest shelf so you'd ask for help. That same man that had proposed to you no long ago, right before he was deployed to a special op God knows where. The fabric of his mask moves when he keeps talking but you don't listen. You can't. Just like you can't stop the tears dribbling down your cheeks and the tremble of your hands. Simon's jaw clenched, brows furrowed as he takes a step back and leaves.

You walk sluggishly to where the dessert awaits. It's when your knees buckle that you finally let out a loud cry.

-

Simon knows he isn't a good man. He's done quite questionable things that he could never say out loud. He knows he's fucked in so many ways. But he also knows that there's one thing that kept him from spiraling further down into an abyss of death and self-loathing.

You.

The woman he decided he wanted to spend the rest of his life with. The girl that didn't care about his past, the bad moments and his complicated persona. You who would selflessly love him without asking for something in return. What had you seen in him in first place? Even now after three years he can't wrap his head around the fact that he has someone who waits for him.

Simon knows how much he loves you, but what he doesn't know is how—or in what earth—he deserves every part of you.

You've been avoiding him ever since that horrible night. Words he can't take back. Looks that haunt him every time he closed his eyes. He hears you cry when you go to sleep or when you're taking a shower. Muffled sobs and wails that will come for him until the day he dies.

You avoid him like a plague, when he walks in. After all he's the one to blame. He wanted to ask you to tear him apart maybe that'd feel less painful.

The last remaining of sanity that was left in him came crashing down when he began to notice how you stared off in a haze, numbly looking at the window. He was losing you. Destroyed the one good thing he had. So, a few days later, despite his own demons. Despite the things that broke him all irreparably during the last mission in Moscow, he comes to find you. Sucking in a sharp breath as his eyes set on your left hand.

The engagement ring was gone, forgotten someplace unknown. Simon felt the panic wrenching his guts.

It's all on him.

He whispers your name, calls you softly. Slowly sitting in front of you, the coffee table creaks under his weight. Words get caught in his throat.

"May I take your hand?" He pleads, not getting an answer. Simon sighs, lowering his head as silent reigns yet again. "I don't deserve you." He murmurs, eyes bored into the floor. "I... I ruin everything I touch. Just never thought I'd ruin my girl."

Your eyes flutter shut, wet tears clinging to your eyelashes. Simon watches as you stand and leave without a word, he follows close behind to your shared room.

"Love..."

"Don't call me that!" the hurt in your voice... the resentment in your eyes, he's earned it.

Simon reaches out for your arm, grabbing you firmly but gently, mindful not to harm you.

"Right I deserve that." If there's one thing Simon regrets it's being the reason that your eyes no longer shine. "What I said... what happened I...-"

Shaking your head and biting down your lip.

"You never gave me the chance, I thought we said we'd always find a way."

"I'm sorry. I'm so fucking sorry baby." in an instant he's pulling you close, although you want to push him away, scream at him, slap him for the calvary he made you go through. "I'm not good with words, and I'm no good person." You feel his body shaking with anxiety as your eyes widen in shock. "I tried... I can't forgive myself for my mistakes."

"Simon..." he hushed you, cradling your head with his big hand. "I can't sleep knowing I can't protect you from what's out there, couldn't bloody protect that kid in Moscow, or my family."

You guide him to the bed, sitting down side by side and holding onto each other.

"Said I would always be with you Simon, why the hell did you push me away?! Have I not given my everything to you? We promised to always make it work!" He grabs your face staring intently into your eyes. "What happened there?"

He blinks, deciding how much to say. There was no need for you to know the entirety of it. He wanted to shield you from the horrors of this world, and he would as long as he lived.

"A young lad whose life's was cut short because I wasn't there on time. How can I come back to you, be happy when someone else just lost their kid..."

"That wasn't on you! Simon Riley you stop that now." He inhales, cinnamon and vanilla flooding his senses. It's you all of you. "Stop carrying the weight of the world on your shoulders. We do that together, yeah?" Your chest hurts from how hard it's beating. "You've done far so much. You won't lose me."

A rumble in the sky and cars passing by outside your home is all you hear. Brown eyes like honey stare back into your soul.

"You took it off..."

"I burnt my hand, it wasn't healing properly. And you know what?" He quirks a brow. "It wasn't homemade bread. It was an apple pie, you silly."

"You'll never forgive me for that one won't you?" He doesn't chuckle but the air feels lighter.

"No. Probably won't." Simon takes your burnt hand bringing it to his lips, they're soft against the marred skin.

"But we're still getting married, yeah?" He asks.

You smile fondly, humming when he kisses your forehead, tears have now dried.

"Yeah. We're still getting married."

[sweetmariihs2]

Since I got a Hunchback of Notre Dame (Disney movie mostly) hyperfocus I've been wondering about some stuff:

Quasimodo poured molten bronze from the top of the cathedral onto the people below, especially Frollo.

1 - He didn't cared about the innocent citizens down there which is weird for his character - maybe it was the stress idk. Or he just knew that the closest ones from the cathedral were the guards, which is where the bronze would fall. But it could have spilled on anyone. Weird.

2 - In the following morning there was no molten bronze (or smoke, or even the stage where Frollo tried to burn Esmeralda) on the square anymore. And everyone was fine?

3 - Why was there molten bronze in Notre Dame, specially in that place? I don't know much about the Middle Ages but it doesn't seem normal for that fire to be lit all the time, it would be a waste of time and firewood. Logically, it would only be melted when a bell needed to be repaired, and Quasimodo was stuck in those chains since they got out of the Court Of Miracles, probably. So it makes no sense.

4 - Poor boy was probably starving there. It was the next day. (Edit: or maybe the Court Of Miracles scene just happened at the previous day 11:00 PM and the fire scene happened at the next day 03:00 AM, who knows?)

5 - I only heard it was molten bronze. First time I watched I got so confused, I'm pretty sure that they didn't said that on the movie. Also, I never heard about churches having that kind of dangerous material inside them. People fixed the bells there? People made them there? Help I'm so confused. Can someone answer me? With real pics please? I tried to make a research but couldn't find anything.

I would also point out that Frollo standed on a gargoyle he HIMSELF had cut in the middle. He dug his own grave. lmao. you can see the cut mark of the sword on the gargoyle next to his feet. I think that's not really obvious and someone out there didn't got it. I only did after like my fourth watch.

Something I also wonder is if the archdeacon told Quasimodo the full story of what Frollo did to his mother. And yes, you may think "of course, I would love to see it that way, Quasimodo deserves to know", and while I agree with you... imagine how he would feel when knowing that the archdeacon knew the truth for years and kept it from him. Let Frollo lie to him, let Frollo abuse him and tell him that his mother abandoned him because he looked like a monster, for years, years and years. He wouldn't be fine. I can only think about his rage when Frollo tried to stab him at the end of the movie or when Phoebus appeared right after Esmeralda escaped from Notre Dame. Poor boy would never be able to look at that archdeacon's face again.

Why did the archdeacon let Frollo just take care of Quasimodo after what Frollo did?! He clearly didn't wanted to take care of the baby, the archdeacon just pushed little Quasi onto his hands for Quasi to suffer! When someone is denying something, they may do it but they'll do it grudgingly. If it was something stupid than it would be fine, but that's a whole life in his hands. The archdeacon just forced abuse on Quasi for years. What did he thought? That because Frollo felt guilty he would be a good father? He knows Frollo's character and saw how reckless he acted with that child's life. And even worse, he could have stopped it. But no, he saw Quasimodo suffering for 20 years and just let it happen.

Just found this on pinterest:

THE GARGOYLES ARE ALIVE AND I DON'T CARE ABOUT WHAT ANYTHING ANYONE SAYS. I also love them. Idc.

We see them interact with the environment around them all the time, mostly during the rebellion in front of Notre Dame by the end of the movie. I know that the sequel is not really good and maybe not even canon but Madeline sees them too. "They can be both schizophrenic" at the same time and seeing/hearing the same stuff? No way. Shut up I won't hear anyone out.

Quasimodo's pure heart and sweet - insecure behavior doesn't come from Frollo's childrearing. It comes from the Gargoyles and the insecurity Frollo buried into Quasi's head.

If Quasimodo was only raised by Frollo, he would be a thrash bag. He would have prejudice against the romani people, instead of just repeating in doubt what Frollo says during the scene where he shows the cathedral's terrace to Esmeralda. He also wouldn't be that sweet kind of guy who covers his view when suddently bumps into a girl changing her clothes. Basically he would be cruel and stupid, just like how Esmeralda said "How could such a cruel man have raised someone like you?"

And the answer is that: He didn't! Frollo taught him everything he needed to know, brought him food, and then left him alone for the rest of the day like we see him doing in the movie. You know who raised Quasimodo? The gargoyles. It's them who turned him into someone sweet and nice to have around. They're his adoptive parents in a way, you know?

And I also think that idea of them never showing themselves to humans but seeing that poor boy being left alone in that belltower made them want to do something about it. Make him some company, and teach him the right stuff - which is what Frollo wasn't doing right, just like everything else he does.

And I'M SURE, I JUST KNOW THAT IT WAS LAVERNE WHO DECIDED TO DO IT FIRST. She tried to convince Hugo and Victor about starting to help little Quasi, but they were afraid of doing it so. Laverne just said "you know what? I can't keep watching this in silence. Fuck it" and they just went along.

Also, something I learned in practice was that when you make someone insecure, convinces that person to believe they're less than anyone else and that they're stupid, dumb and ugly, this person tends to be extra nice to get approval of others. They don't even do it on purpose, the're just trying to make up for their appearence and stupidness through acts of kindess and service. And if that's done to them since a young age like it was done to Quasimodo, they do it unintentionally, and it turns into a personality trait. In a "I'm sorry for being like this. Let me make up for you" way. Like Quasimodo said "I know that I'm ugly", and in my opinion that's one of the worse ilnesses someone can have. It's not even a real ilness, and yet it's so damn hard to cure. Lmao that's totally not based on something I experienced, of course not. That's exactly why I absolutely don't kin Quasimodo. Of course not.

Children come into the world with a natural desire to discover and explore. To make Quasimodo so quiet and submissive, Frollo must have given the worst kinds of punishments to "discipline" him. He probably hit him more than once. Locked him somewhere? Maybe worse, Frollo tends to be quite creative when punishing innocent people. He broke all of Quasi's stuff he made for weeks, maybe years, just to scare him, and because he was angry.

It makes me even more worried to see how Quasi reacts to Frollo everytime they're together. He just reacts with fear and respect every time. Fear, mostly fear. What kinds of things hasn't this boy endured by disobeying or responding in a way that didn't pleased Frollo? To have to pick up the plates correctly and immediately sit down to study, and call him his "master" instead of just "Frollo".

I would also like to point out how Frollo stopped calling Quasimodo "Quasimodo" and started calling him "hunchback" closer to the end of the movie. That's how he sees him after all these years. A dumb, ugly and miserable guy who obeys him and is not even seen as a human. Have you ever watched The Goonies? You know that guy? Yes, that guy? I think that Frollo sees Quasi like this. The novel version reinforces this even more, with Quasimodo not being able to hear and barely talking.

I also headcanon that Disney's Quasimodo is still a bit deaf because of the bells. He can still hear, but lower. Sometimes his friends need to call his name twice.

And now these thoughts deserve a whole part of the post to discuss (Frollo and Esmeralda centered):

Frollo was probably considered ANCIENT because the life expectancy during medieval times was around 25-30 years. The guy was at his 66 years old.

1 - I know that in the book he's described as being afraid of woman, and a priest, so it made sense that he wasn't married. But that didn't happened in the movie. And as a (pervert) 66 yo old man, christian, white, powerful (judge and I still headcanon him as a fiefdom owner in the movie idc it makes sense in my head), traditional, who claims he's the only right person in the world and who does all kinds of atrocities, and who literally threatens (and tries) to kill Esmeralda if she refuses to "be his". Why didn't he had a wife? I mean, he could manipulate a woman or anyone for that matter if he wanted someone to... yk. I want to discuss more about this in the following topic.

What did Frollo meant when he said "Choose me or the fire"? I mean, there were three meanings for that quote in that context: "be in love with me", "hook up with me" or "be my wife (both, except that she would be stuck with him forever, and that's probably what he meant)"

Since he's a traditional christian guy and probably a sexist too based off his character, it would only made sense that he's the kind of guy to say "the man provides, the housewifes do the house chores and take care of the children".

As we see in 'Hellfire', he seems to support the purity culture, celibacy. And he's blaming himself for feeling attraction towards Esmeralda.

But this also can be for two reasons: because he choose celibacy, OR because she's a romani girl, which are people you know he despises. Or it can be both. That's also a doubt of mine.

Continuing my train of thought and taking this into consideration, Frollo feels extremely guilty for feeling attracted to her, and he claims "Destroy Esmeralda and let her taste the fires of hell; Or else let her be mine and mine alone" (I know you sang it).

Based off this, and knowing that Frollo is a radical (and hypocrite, but somehow he refuses to accept his lust for a long time) conservative christian, it would only made sense he would consummate after wedding. And by his word choices "let her be mine and mine alone", "choose me or the fire" sounds like he would like to MAKE HER HIS, PERMANENTLY. Maybe these words don't have this meaning? Maybe they're just about having her once? Maybe. But who knows. He's that kind of religious guy.

On the other way, he despises romani people and is disgusted of Esmeralda at the same time he's crazy about her. He calls her a witch, says it's her fault he was having those thoughts, "look at that disgusting display" (that classic kind of guy who says short skirts are innapropriate and too provocative but it's trying to look under them, iykyk). Basically he hates Esmeralda, who she is, despises her dance and calls it "disgusting display" and yet he's lusting over her. Considering this, it would only make sense he would do what he wants and leave her aside somehow, Frollo wouldn't want people to know that he married a romani girl, or a "vulgar girl" like her, maybe Frollo doesn't sees "the potential in her to be in a christian marriage", you know that that's extremely in character for him.

If Esmeralda had accepted his offer and did what he wanted, what would have happened? He would marry her and would exhibit her as a recanted woman? In a "I fixed her" kind of way, "and now she's my wife"? He would wipe all of her originality, personality and being out of her and turn her into his puppet like Elvis did to Priscilla in the movie "Priscilla", but worse? She would live an unhappy life with him and probably have his children too because this kind of guy believes in "only indulging in carnal acts when the purpose it's to reproduce"? Or maybe not, maybe he doesn't want children, but it doesn't matter because guys like him usually leaves all that on their wife's backs.

Also during the song "Hellfire" we see how fire Esmeralda "burns at the stake" and turns into smoke, flying into his direction with open arms. That's kinda metaphoric about him torturing her in that stake, stripping her of who she is and turning her into a ghost of herself. One that doesn't burn like flames, is softer, quieter, and willing for him and his twisted love - the kind of wife this kind of guy want.

While it also makes sense of him only having her once and considering Esmeralda "too promiscuous and part of the 'the common, vulgar, weak, licentious crowd', not good enough to be his wife", it's also possible that he's hinting about turning Esmeralda into a quiet, submissive and sad wife. "I can save you in this world and the other" maybe also hints at that, changing her so she's not "sinning" anymore by being who she is.

YOU KNOW WHAT? MADONNA AND THE PROSTITUTE THEORY ALL THE WAY UP. THAT'S WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT.

There's a great channel on Youtube called "Final Girl Studios" and the owner of the channel makes video essays, she LOVES to mention this subject. It fits perfectly what we're talking about.

And ALSO I WOULD ABSOLUTELY LOVE TO MENTION HER ESSAY ABOUT THE MOVIE "VALERIE AND HER WEEK OF WONDERS". She talks about the Madonna and the prostitute theory and how the movie surrounds around this. And it's relevant to mention here that this movie has everything to do with the dynamic and topics discussed between Frollo and Esmeralda, not only in the Disney movie but also in the other adaptations and in the original novel.

I mean, it's a movie that's about a young girl called Valerie who just got into her puberty and spent a week finding out about how harsh the world is towards woman in general. So many things happen in this movie, but you can get what I mean when knowing that there's a scene when the priest tries to take advantage of her but fails because he remembered he should be celibate, and later then on the movie he tries to burn her at the stake, saying that she's a witch and seduced him to sin. Valerie then shows him her tongue.

Gosh that was so fun to take out of my chest and share. Someone needs to make a full post or video about how the Madonna x Whore subject is related to Esmeralda and Frollo. It's too much work for me, but maybe you guys would like to.

Also my friend mentioned about Esmeralda wearing different clothes during the stake scene. And yeah, okay, but if she was wearing different clothes, someone made her dress them, or dressed her themselves. She (my friend) was afraid that Esmeralda may have been assaulted or abused in any way during that period of time. I don't think Frollo did anything drastic like she does, or else he wouldn't be asking Esmeralda to "recant" and accept his offer.

[shmistarkiller]

So since it's been a few weeks since I first watched The Acolyte, I feel like I've managed to gather my thoughts about what I think some bits from s1 were hinting at wrt Qimir's backstory. This is just what I think, I really never expect anyone to agree with anything I say lol.

Obviously we know Vernestra was his master, and that she somehow ended up betraying him, using her saber-whip to carve that gnarly scar up his back.

I think where I probably differ from most if not all other viewers is, I'm of the opinion Qimir was actually fairly young when it happened. Like, younger than a teenager even.

The whole thing with him building the cortosis helmet based on the sensory deprivation ones younglings use. I guess that might not necessarily mean anything, but it would make sense to me that he'd more likely be inspired by it if he'd been abandoned closer to the age when they would be using it. He uses cortosis specifically to keep other force users out of his head, his former master by far who he most wants to keep from reading his thoughts. The fact that he reacts like a little kid being caught by their parent when Vernestra senses him again on Brendok could be a trauma response, him reverting to the last time she was in his mind. He keeps the magic helmet of protection on for the rest of the time until they leave Brendok and he's safely far away from the cause of his fear.

Osha saying she never heard of him? What if it's because Vernestra dispatched of her little youngling padawan not long after the beginning of his training? The loss of a youngling who hadn't been with the Order for very long would be a lot easier to cover up than one of the older padawans. Create some story of a tragic accident to be documented in the official records, Jedi are supposed to be all too-bad-so-sad-but-no-attachments anyway, so it goes completely unquestioned.

So then, what the hell did Vernestra see a small child do that led her to think leaving him for dead at her own hands was a reasonable reaction? She gets echoes from the force of the combat & slaughter that happened on Khofar and it's very clear she senses something familiar. It could just be that she's sensing the presence of her long lost padawan by itself, but it would be real gnarly if this is something she's seen quite literally before. I'm not saying fetus!Qimir managed to kill a bunch of people in the same way that adult!Mr. Stranger did .. but I'm not *not* saying that either.

I think it builds a stronger case for the kinship he feels toward Osha (and maybe initially with Mae as well). The twins were 8 years old when their personal life tragedy struck, so I can see him connecting more strongly with Mae's story if he too had been of a similar age when his own personal life tragedy occurred. Extra reason why he'd feel so much more in common with Osha, how much he recognizes himself in her.

Idk how deep I wanna dip my toes in on the Plagueis stuff, but if I can get back on my Ben Solo bullshit for a second, it wouldn't surprise me if old Muun-man Plagueis was whispering in little boy Qimir's ear. And Vernestra, rather than actually try to save an innocent child, would instead cut her losses, viewing him as a liability/lost cause already practically fallen to the dark side. We know The Acolyte doesn't shy away from citing the inspiration it took from TLJ, so I can easily see "You failed him by thinking his choice was made. It wasn't." applying here as well.

(And maybe the irony there is that Luke having attachment to his nephew is what kept him from attempting to murder Ben until he was at least a grownass adult. Whereas Vernestra who lives in the height of the Jedi Order's power would definitely be less inclined to preserve the life of a literal child if she thought they could prove to be an eventual threat to the status quo she prefers. Either way, a foregone conclusion. You treat a child like they're a monster, guess what they grow up to be.)

EDIT (09/07/24): Can't believe I forgot this one. The way Qimir is so callous about killing Jecki. Sol says she was a child, and his response just comes off very "yeah, so what, so was I (when I was left for dead)". Qimir seems convinced Jedi masters leading their padawans to their potential/inevitable death is definitely just A Thing™ that happens.

Some extra quibbling with ideas I just rather disagree with ..

I've seen others theorize that Qimir could actually be older than he looks and that it's Plagueis feeding him whatever that ability is to stay young/immortal, but I personally can't really think of any actual reason why that would be the case. His line about having been a Jedi a long time ago is pretty vague, so while it could apply, I'm not particularly swayed by it being proof of this theory.

I guess the other thing is people think he and Sol grew up together and were padawans at the same time? Which ties back into the idea of him being older than he looks, but again, there's nothing particularly convincing me of that idea either. When Qimir shows up masked and goes, "You don't remember me?" And Sol replies, "I do sense something familiar." To me that came off as taunting that none of them caught on when he was pretending to be the apothecary. (If anything, I initially for whatever reason thought the "You?" "Surprise!" exchange between Yord & Qimir was hinting to the idea that they'd known each other, until I remembered the aforementioned bit about Qimir's messy girl apothecary charade.)

Vernestra mentioning that she remembered Sol as a shy little padawan, and having been Qimir's master seems to be another reason for the prior two theories. But to me that ignores the possibility that Vernestra herself could also have been a child when she first met Sol. It's less clear to me since she's a humanoid non-human SW species, for all we know she could be the one who's way older than she looks because of that. And if she was already an adult and knew both Sol & Qimir as children, that still doesn't mean that was at the same time.

Okay. I think that's everything. (And if it's not I'll quietly come back and slip in whatever relevant edits I'll want to add in.)

[petarabbit2]

Realistic Trey Clover + Headcanons

Trey Clover + Realistic artwork done with Art Breeder and edited in Clip Art Studio:

This happens a lot with my headcanons but after analysing Trey he went from one of my least favourites to one of my favourites in no time – hope you like him as much as I do!

Sidenote: When headcanoning Trey and all my other characters I take both factual and some of my personal thoughts/beliefs of the character to construct my headcanons.

For my rendition of Trey Clover, I kept him relatively close to his in-game design and didn't give him any visible flaws (ance, moles, etc.) since Trey’s diet seems pretty balanced, he knows eating too many sweets can give you cavities. It would also help with his skin’s condition, it wouldn't be smooth or perfect but wouldn't have many visible red breakouts, but isn't immune to a few pimples here and there.

You may also notice I gave him stubble on his chin because Trey in game looks very mature, plus it is extremely common for his age period to start developing body hair (face, body, etc.) and Trey probably got this.

For his realistic rendition, I went with a rectangular face shape that is fairly chiselled (Trey is on that mewing streak 🤫🧏‍♀️), almond eyes with THICK eyebrows and the cherry on top being his very broad and straight nose. In conclusion, I made him a chad. (tee hee yummy)

For his body MY MAN IS BUILT, so a rectangular fairly muscular build (thick fucking arms bro is kneeding that bread) 

And yet another pom 😞 but it's all done for a reason! The rose kingdom is based on the UK so I just gave everyone from there an accent and depending on personal thoughts depends on how strong I make it and yes, Trey has a strong accent – he doesn't really use slang though, idk he's a bit too mature for that.

Without & With Makeup:

Personality and backstory headcanons + a bit of character analysis:

Ah yes, the “dad” of Heartslabyul and I don't disagree with this basic statement but sometimes he is dumbed down to just that, a “dad”. Yes, young adults such as himself can have a stronger connection to his morals, but he’s still only 18, and most importantly human. Not everything he will do will be correct, and even if they are good in theory, they may still have negative consequences.

For example, just before Riddles overblot, Ace even blatantly asked him why he hasn't corrected Riddle behaviour because he thought that just staying by his side, comforting him and being his friend was enough but quickly learnt it wasn't. Trey has always been the oldest, with his friends, with his siblings and he had always had that sense of responsibility over the younger generations (also seen with first and second years in-game), however, other than that, his character isn’t heavily touched on besides just being the “dad” or “big brother”.

Trey probably has moments where he questions himself, if he's the best person for others to rely on. What I'm trying to say is that neither his mind nor body is fully developed and even people like him who seem so strong have their weak moments.

Trey genuinely cares a lot for his loved ones, both friends and family, and usually takes on a mediator role to solve issues and help others. Though, he’s a little bit of a people pleaser and when something is out of his depth and he doesn’t immediately see the ‘right’ way to do something, he tends to try and avoid the root cause of the issue and instead finds an easier solution, which may not have the best turnout in the end. 

For example, Trey’s feelings around Riddle’s overblot and childhood trauma affecting his present-day behaviour. I believe that Trey felt horrible after Riddles overblot, seen when he said he's sorry to Riddle despite being Riddles own fault. When Trey can’t fulfil that “dad” role or sees he's been doing something wrong for a long time he doesn't know what to do.

He doesn’t do this out of a lack of care, but because of how much he cares instead. He is also often seen pandering to other’s wants just to please them and make sure they are happy. Also as mentioned before, he is still young, he still may not know the best thing to do, but these actions he takes he sees as a sort of in-the-moment solution.

Trey appreciates deep conversation and knows what to say in them, he's good at comforting and will observe all the people he cares about so he knows exactly how to comfort that specific person.

Trey is always looking out for his friends, whether that be making sure they are keeping up with the school's work and getting decent grades, or making sure they aren't getting into too much rough housing with others. If this does happen however, Trey would definitely go out of his way to tutor lower classmen to the best of his ability or have a ‘talk’ if he has to with people picking on his friends.

My editor/assistant cause I can’t grammar or spell to save my life: @cyb3rpnnk 

SIDENOTE: DO NOT REPOST MY REALISTIC RENDITION OF DEUCE OR ANY OTHER CHARACTER I DO AS YOUR OWN. EVEN THOUGH THE BASE WAS MADE WITH AI IT IS STILL MY CREATION!

However you are permitted to use my headcanoing as your own for art or stories or whatever, just not my realistic rendition.

I dont have much to say this time, but the next one with either be Riddle or Cater idk.

[cosmicarchivist692]

Radiorose Week Day 1: Alastor's Subconscious Routine

[2/8]

Edit:

I messed up scheduling when I was working on this, so if you read it before 6/8/24 (the proper release date), it's changed! Read it again! (or don't, it's up to you.)

"Rosie, are you home?!" Al yelled as he stood outside the emporium. He had knocked several times and there was no response. This was odd, they had a walk planned at this time every week.

Rosie finally opened the door and came outside. There was a bit of blood on her cheek.

"Sorry about that Al, I was dealing with my now ex-husband." She said cheerfully. Alastor pulled out a handkerchief, reached over, and wiped the blood off her face.

Alastor put it in his pocket and said, "I can tell, you were a tad... messy."

Rosie's cheeks turned a little pink. Embarrassed, she stuck out her arm, "Shall we?"

Alastor linked his arms with Rosie's and they started their afternoon stroll. Alastor was always keen to be on the right of Rosie; he said it was so he could hold his staff in his dominant hand, but Rosie knew better. Deep down, she was certain he was a bit of a softy.

"I see you had a falling out with yet another husband, dinner tomorrow at 7 per usual then?" Rosie sighed and said: "Yes, though I think we'll have leftovers this time round."

They continued their stroll through Cannibal Town. Ever since the incident years ago, Alastor had grown closer to Rosie, she was his only real friend after all; she had been there through it all. He looked forward to their weekly walks. Rosie, on the other hand, while also enjoying their walks, thought doing the same thing week after week was getting a bit stale.

"Hmm, still. I think that was a new record," Rosie chuckled. "I don't know what you saw in him though... or any of your other exes" Alastor told Rosie.

"Yes... I know, deer. You've been quite vocal about that before," she responded slightly annoyed, but a small smile betraying her presentation.

They eventually made it back to the emporium and, per usual, Rosie invited Al inside. He wouldn't come in any other way. He held the door open for Rosie as they walked in.

When they made it inside, Rosie pulled out one of her boxes of chocolate fingers that she kept in stock for after their walks. She put the box on the coffee table and they sat down together on the couch to gossip.

"I hear the queen is planning something big." Good, someone needs to do it, the king is too short to think big." Rosie took a moment before responding, "What, do you think he's... short-sighted?" "Haha Rosie." Alastor said with a smile on his face.

"I like it when you smile deer. It's really something special." Rosie said, putting on the charm.

"Oh thank you Rosie," he touched his spiky teeth, "I like to believe it can be intimidating too." He said, completely ignorant to Rosie's advance.

After 30 minutes or so, they finished their gossip, said goodbye, and Alastor left. Stood right outside the front door, he told his shadow: "Stick with Rosie, it would be quite unfortunate for this one to have friends hellbent on revenge. Make sure she stays safe... but, perhaps don't let her see you." His shadow nodded and slipped inside. Alastor paused before heading off to his radio tower.

Author's Note:

Hey! I'm planning something, and all of the fics I'm writing for this week will be part of the same AU! So in timeline order, this is part 2 of 8. Also, this is probably the shortest one. Other ones will be longer! This is also my first actual fanfic! So do not expect Shakespeare. They will release everyday this week, the links at the bottom is just to read it in timeline order.

Edit after the... scheduling incident:

Also, I have never used Tumblr's queue system, and I still don't quite grasp it, but the other posts seem to be working so... idk? I must've just messed this one up lol.

@radioroseweek

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[carmenized-onions]

hi. tried to reblog and leave a bunch of tags but made a mistake and tumblr wouldn't let me edit the post SO i took a screenshot because I WILL NOT REWRITE ALL OF THAT BECAUSE IT WAS ALREADY TERRIBLE TO TRY AND GO BACK TO MY NOTES TO INCLUDE THEM INTO THE TAGS BECAUSE THE APP WOULD ERASE EVERYTHING so here you have a long ass pic with a ton of tags. love u u fucking mastermind 💋

I DID IN FACT GET THIS ASK FIRST OF ALL, IF YOU SENT ANOTHER ONE OTHER THAN THE DID YOU GET THAT ONE, then I am missing one, but I got this one!

I'm so glad you think it could standalone and make sense because I went into posting this like "so many people are not gonna be able to keep up with the tense changing and the time skipping, i'm being incoherent" thank you all for proving me wrong. My writing profs taught me to believe everyone does not have reading comprehension. Perhaps we should be giving more credit to readers, me thinks.

Man, I wish Carmen in The Bear canon aligned with CK not particularly because I wish he was better but because watching S3 I was like oh,,,, did I get all that wrong? Because to me, yeah does Carmen run away from things? 1 fucking million percent. At the same time, however, Carmen is an artist and I think like,,,, he's taught, yknow? He takes direction and critique, is always how I took him-- And so like, he just compartmentalizes criticism of his character the same way he would his craft; and he fucking likes making shit better, so he transfers it to life.

I considered massively pivoting from this choice for him to accept that he needs to be better, and instead like, Bojacks it, basically, but like, I'd already done this in CK canon:

Did I emulate my own previous scene to call back to the beginning of their relationship in chapter 13? Yeah 100% I did but back on topic--

I'd already decided that this was how Carmen went about things, and to be fair, I think honestly if everyone had just let each other finish sentences in S3EP01, that entire season I think would've gone an entirely different route, but c'est la vie, that's the tragic comedy of it all.

NOW ONTO MIKEY! I think some have said they prefer this Jimmy negotiation to canon-- And to be fair, though the sobriety aspect may not have been a part of it, Mikey did say he wanted to franchise with Carmen, and that's what the money was for. Or at least that's what Carmen affirms:

god fucking jesus christ he was so much more charming in S2 what the FUCK moving ON

But anyways, I think the 10k/week thing honestly is something Uncle would do, and I guess this is me staking my bet on it. I'd like to believe Mikey was climbing his way out-- Or maybe that's more tragic? I dunno. Regardless, I adore him, so, yknow. he's the guy!

50 PLUS YEARS FOR CARMEN? YOU THINK THIS GUY COULD LIVE TO 80? BABY LOOK UP POPCORN LUNG THIS MAN WAS GETTING ULCERS AT 21 WE'RE LUCKY IF WE GET TO 60

regardless, thank you for enjoying i'm so glad that my interpretation of Mikey was enjoyed. I tried to be as like,,, accurate as possible to what I feel he'd act like out of the small scenes we've seen of him, but I also absolutely had to pull from my own oldest brother. so. i don't have issues idk what all of you are talking about.

also, I will put this in a master post of like, bits I was doing, later, because there's a fucking lot, but this is the last post I'm making before bed and I wanna get yelled at about this in my inbox in the morning nothing makes me happier:

Chapter 1! Tony Terry Tommy!

Chapter 13! Two Steps Back.

I know I'm a bitch, aren't I? I'm sure rereaders noticed this but I wanted the whole class to know.

While I'm at it, Chapter 12! Hit em with it!

YEAH BABY SHE'D BEEN THINKING ABOUT IT THE WHOOOOLLLEEE TIMMEEEEE YEEEEAAAHHHHHHHH I'm fucked up for this one. I had the Cold thing planned since chapter 1 I'm so SICK with it. Yell at me in my inbox I do love to make everyone mad ngl call me Carmen cause I'm a fucking shit starter baby

thank you for your thoughts and thank you for giving me a place to yap for WAY too fucking long GOOD NIGHT OR GOOD MORNING PENDING WHERE YOU ARE!!

[midnightsequia]

Would people be interested in a zombie apocalypse au of a Jeff the killer x reader fanfic lmao I've been slowly writing one like here and there in my notes app so I have random scenes that are not connected at all lol here's a little sneak below the cut!

Basically a slow burn, xreader no mention of yn/__ I hate the underscores lmao and probably strangers to friends to lovers? Idk we will see ill probably post it all anyways

This is not edited!

This is not revised!

A true WIP!

"You are staying." Jeff poked your chest hard causing you to stumble back.

"In what world? There are dozens of dead in there and you expect me to stay outside?" Emphasizing 'outside' you swatted his hand away and pulled your fingers into fists by your side. In your eyes you had gotten better with your pistol and could be a great helpful asset to Jeff while scavenging.

"You're a liability and would get me killed." In his eyes you are a beginner. Someone who still shakes while holding a gun, afraid to pull the trigger in fear of blowing his head off. Your eyes flared with rage. Trying to calm yourself down from a loud outburst from frustration not wanting to attract unwanted attention. The two of you are getting too loud. "Just stay here for Christ's sake." His shoulders slacked, no longer holding annoyance and anger but instead his maniacal eyes covered themselves in guilt and sadness. He was looking towards your worn shoes. Pleading you wouldn't be stupid enough to follow him.

"Fine. If I dont hear from you in fifteen minutes, I will come in myself and get you." Crossing your arms you stood straight now almost the same height as him.

"No you will not."

"Yes. I will. I'm compromising with you." Jeff grumbled something incomprehensible under his breath. Why doesn't he see that you do care about his well being?

"Fine," He spat "I'll go in, clear the area, like I usually do, and you come in and help gather everything. Hunter, gather style." When mentioning "hunter" He pointed to himself, and gatherer to you. Jeff pulled his knife out, the knife had aged terribly, causing your worry to only grow. He hasn't had the proper tools to efficiently sharpen the blade. The rock he had been using was causing more damage than sharpening the blade and there were a few chips in it as well. Staring at the knife with your worry written all over your face Jeff rolled his eyes and gleamed it in the sun trying to blind you. "It's gonna be fine. This is me we are talking about. Ill come back through this door." He gave a large smirk and left into the large department store. You went across the car riddled street and sat one that had crashed into a tree.

Jeff quietly made his way into the store. You had told him that this store would have clothes and food most definitely since it looked clean. He had wanted more than anything else in the world now something other than poorly cooked squirrel or chipmunk. He probably wouldn't get it since it's been months since the world ended but the canned food should be like new. The sliding door was unlocked and opened with a soft ding.

"Open 24/7" Jeff scoffed to himself, "now more than ever." He thought. He had nearly jumped in delight when he saw that the store was almost untouched. This was located on the outskirts of a small town, on a road down to the coast on the way here they had only passed a few empty, well now empty, homes and they had store brand food in their trash. This store, giving you two a lead on where to possibly find supplies.

Blood was splattered across the ground and there was a funk in the air making Jeff hold back a gag. He was glad you didn't come in with him, "Oh it smells atrocious in here." He had heard your voice in his head complaining, then holding back the little bile you had left. You couldn't handle the smell of more than two zombies at a time, he couldn't begin to imagine your laughable reaction to this.

Off in the distance of the store there was a rattle of some carts

[lyerra]

ROOM OF SWORDS SPOILERS

just me ranting about webtoon's comment section because I want to exteriorize some stuff

The whole Roseberry situation is so so weird to me. Tbh when I started room of swords I didn't care much about the ships, I was there for the plot, but when strawbarrow was revealed to have been canon all along I was so happy for them

However a lot of people were displeased because they thought Gyrus would end up with Tori.

I think one of the comment sections that struck me the most was right as the episode ended with Tori kissing "Gyrus" (who was actually Kodya in Gyrus' body pretending to be him) and someone commented "imagine possessing your boyfriend's body only for some girl to kiss him" which was a pretty funny comment

some people responded however that if anything Kodya was Gyrus' ex because he had been in a relationship with BB!Gyrus but New Gyrus didn't know him the same way. Which WOULD have been a good argument to make if Gyrus hadn't been making puppy eyes at Kodya since S1...

tbh it's fine not to see it, I didn't see it either at first, but to say that Gyrus was CLEARLY attracted to Tori???????? when he never showed any sign of liking her as more than a friend?

I've read RoS many, many times both before and after it ended (been reading it from 2019 oh god it's been so long???) and all through S1 there are these small, small hints that Gyrus has a small crush on Kodya EVEN THOUGH he doesn't remember him. They were always meant to be together.

Tori does develop some feelings towards him, granted (we do learn that it's because he looks like her beloved but that's later, people couldn't have known back then), but that doesn't make Gyrus entitled to return them.

People shipping Roseberry shouldn't make the authors entitled to change THE ENTIRE PLOT simply because some people aren't happy with their story choices.

At that point there's been many hints that New Gyrus and Kodya are still attracted to one another and I'm just sad and confused that those people were in so much denial.

On the brighter side, the next episode really starts with Tori telling "Gyrus" that she knows he loves Kodya because she's seen him LITERALLY PINING SINCE DAY ONE. AND THAT SHES A LESBIAN.

case closed, right? Kodya and Gyrus are canon and still very much in love, and Tori herself is in love with another, yet unnamed woman.

well lo and behold: s2 finale's comment section!

we finally see Kodya and Gyrus sharing their first kiss onscreen, so someone in the comment section said something like "THEY FINALLY KISSED AAAAA OUR SHIP IS SAILING" which was also my reaction and a legit reaction to it??

and since there was A LOT of dislikes (over 1,6k I believe) the op edited to say something about homophobes and the backlash was even greater

and in the answers there was actually quite a lot of people being salty because their own ship didn't sail and

I mean idk

maybe I can't understand because my ship sailed and not theirs but what the hell

first of all homophobes exist. the authors commented that they had lost about 20% of their audience when they revealed that Gyrus and Kodya were canon, and they received a lot of hate online for it.

second of all as I said it's not about ships it's about the plot. strawbarrow was always endgame and the whole story, including the romance between Kodya and Gyrus and the important role it played on the story, been planned since over a year before RoS was published. this is not your story, if you're not happy about it go read or write some fix it fanfics (it's not so bad once you get used to it). but in terms of writing strawbarrow was so well executed, I feel like being mad just because of a ship is really disrespecting the authors' intentions.

third of all, it had been made painfully clear since A LONG TIME AGO that they wouldn't end up together. clinging onto that hope was really unnecessary. they shouldn't be mad anymore, it had been over for a while now and they should have made their peace. people complaining by the time of s2 finale were really just delusional.

fourth of all, the dislikes may not all be from homophobes but if they aren't then they're from jerks. it's not because you're unhappy that things didn't go your way that you have to hate on other people because they got what they wanted and not you. that's just being mean smh,, let people enjoy the things they like in peace

[chocolatespyro]

Me learning to not give people the benefit of the doubt when they've been given the benefit of the doubt about 50 times already

(III 15 edition. Spoilers under the cut if you still haven't seen it somehow.)

EDIT: Took out the part about them not mentioning her disability since Bot does say that they wouldn't want Cabby to forget iirc, also about them not thinking kids would understand disability since I wasn't happy with those points and I feel they were inaccurate or somewhat off-topic. That's pretty much it though.

The more I think abt it the more I can see how the Bot apology sucks lmaoooo

Dunno if this was a point made on Twitter (I've heard there's been discontent there? I dont have Twitter tho but I'd LOVE to hear more from other Cabby fans abt what's going on there. u can leave comments on this post if u want or u can just rb and do it thru tags.)

Anyways, to my main points: Bot just says they're sorry for... forcing Cabby to get permission to use her files?

What about them lying to Cabby? I don't believe they ever really apologized for that. OR TOLD HER THAT THEY LIED??

Bot also doesn't really apologize for the other main points people were upset for I think?

I don't think bot ever really takes full accountability for judging Cabby either. No one does really. Like... at least an

"I'm sorry. I really screwed up, and so did a lot of the other contestants. We were too harsh and judgmental towards you for no reason, and our insecurities shouldn't have gotten in the way of you being able to remember. This was supposed to be a fun and welcoming environment and vacation... but it became a nightmare for you instead. I know this won't make up for all the damage done, but I hope this file is useful to you."

(maybe reworded some to fit Bot's personality better, but the apology shouldn't have just been this quick one-off moment taken to the side like in canon.)

To kinda add to the above, I also think it would've been nice if Bot fully noticed and acknowledged HOW other people haven't been treating Cabby very kindly too by giving examples of where nobody stood up for her. Lifering was a great supportive person in the episode, but Bot was there for some of the shit that was pulled against Cabby, ESPECIALLY in episode 7. I so wish that that was acknowledged here. And the fact that Test Tube went directly behind Cabby's back to do that. Where does Bot think Test Tube got those files from?

There's also the fact that Test Tube never approaches to apologize for judging Cabby for no reason. Like she just stares at Cabby and Bot hugging for a few seconds after Bot apologizes that's it. And she... doesn't accuse Cabby. That's the barest fucking minimum she could've done.

Also... the "inaccurate depictions" thing wasn't even true outside of Baseball's file... and that was a bunch of contrived bs. Like Suitcase literally had this whole thing where she stood up to Nickel and I guess... Cabby glossed over that somehow??? I can't suspend my disbelief this much sorry all. Idk where the "Manipulated by Balloon" shit came from. Correct me if I'm wrong bcus I haven't seen season 2.

The only reason why it was inaccurate with Bot is because Cabby thought Bot was Bow, something Cabby IMMEDIATELY corrected herself on. Bot coulda just... reminded Cabby that it wasn't her fault because she didn't know Bot and Bow were two different objects and told Cabby to just... start a new file like others said??? So that shit didn't make sense.

The apology just... kinda feels shallow. Cabby didn't do anything wrong here. She's beaten herself up over this shit. It just hurts to watch.

Bot only really apologized for a single thing and we don't get any acknowledgement towards the lying or the mistreatment or Cabby destroying Bow's file as some sort of garbage symbolism attempt.

Bot's apology was kinda supposed to tie everything together and top everything off nicely in a better and at least slightly more satisfying way than whatever the fuck 14 did, but it just... doesn't. It barely acknowledges the issues. They don't really show how seriously they screwed up with Cabby.

I wanna believe that AE has the best intentions here, but they're on very thin ice in my eyes. If they screw up any next steps with Cabby and/or never address Cabby's issues with Test Tube ever again, I think I'm done having any kind of faith in AE. Even Cabby winning wouldn't save it.

Yeah sorry this got really depressing, this situation is just sad

[insomniac-101]

God so I just recently purchased the Blu-ray edition of the tenth doctor's run and have been watching the commentary tracks for each episode (which btw, are soo good if you're a major fan of this era. They add a lot of context and extra details to the episodes).

I just finished the girl in the fireplace's commentary track and thankfully hearing the cast's comments on the scenes made it all the more bearable. Not because i hate the episode, but because everytime I rewatch it, it feels like reopening a flesh wound lol

Like it makes me so sad for everyone lmao.

Personally I am not of the opinion that it is badly written, I think the episode does a good job of exploring the more unflattering sides of the Doctor and his duties while also simultaneously exploring the strengths of those choosing to associate with him.

Within the episodes, the three leads make the ultimate sacrifice.

With Madame de pompadour sacrificing a slow path with the doctor for the greater good.

With Rose letting him go, knowing that his selflessness would never allow him to see someone he has come to care for, suffer a meaningless death

And the Doctor, choosing to step in and save Reinette, because it's the right thing to do in spite of knowing there's a possibility that he will never return. Especially with the amount of flirting they did, he formed a connection and now is made to pay the price for it.

It's such a sad episode, and the hurt on all sides always makes me feel so bad for everyone involved. Especially for Rose in particular, who has to put aside her personal feelings and step in spite of knowing how the doctor and Reinette feel about one another ( I wouldn't say love, but there's an attraction there definitely)

It goes to show how brave these two women are to do what is right even if it directly hinders their own needs. How much strength it really takes to accompany the doctor, given that one never knows how their adventures will end.

It also goes to show why you often don't see the doctor make promises to those he rescues. Why he often keeps people at a distance, because getting to know these people in peril personally makes losing them all too real. They become a priority above his better judgement, and he cannot escape the consequences of letting himself feel something towards them.

It's an unfortunate situation, but I think it goes to strengthen the bond between Rose and the Doctor further. As it not only explains why submitting to romantic attraction is a doomed endeavor on the Doctor's part, but why they both function well as a pair. Making them the only two in the scenario to really understand the repercussions of what has occurred on the big scale of things, but nonetheless letting the other grieve regardless.

Idk it's a war of conflicting feelings really lmao because although I am not a fan of the romance between him and Reinette (for other reasons), it manages to humanize him further. Making him a flawed individual that is not above making insensitive decisions or falling for flattery. He has feelings and emotions, that although help him sympathize to those around him, can also make him vulnerable in the same way any human is.

I think it adds to his character, although I will admit it had unfortunate timing on when it took place over the course of the overall character development (which ironically is a point that I have seen most agree with, even those that aren't the biggest fan of the Doctor and Rose romance). Overall, just very conflicted lmao

Lol just had to write out my thoughts, there will probably be more to come about these episodes since I'll be rewatching them.

[oveliagirlhaditright]

Reasons I think a Final Fantasy VIII Remake could've could be fun:

Addressing the elephant in the room first: yes, they would have to rework the Junction system (since the Junction system is canon to the story). But I don't think there's anything saying that they wouldn't be able to do that all these years later (and that maybe Square has even having thought about it some during said long years). I for sure think they'd be able to find a way to make it better (and less broken for those who get it, and less complicated for those who don't) and something new for this generation, ala FFVIIR's battle system.

Rewrites to the story: this is a thing that would probably have to be a thing that would happen, too, as the story of FFVIII is admittedly not perfect: Most of all to make characters other than Squall and Rinoa more important to the overall story, I think. But seeing just how Square Enix was able to handle character writing in the FFVIIR parts-- and add changes to the story that didn't hurt things (we're not talking about the Whispers or timeline stuff here), but rather enhanced it: like explaining that the Gi created the black materia--I have faith in them.

Now for some things that I, personally, would love to see, that I think could help FFVIII in the modern era, and perhaps the story:

My friend @bluerosesburnblue in defending Rinoa Heartily one time, once described her as a social justice warrior--with all the best intentions--who doesn't exactly know what she's getting into, and gets in over her head. And she's exactly right. If FFVIII were to ever be remade, I'd love to see that sort of direction taken with Rinoa's character, perhaps.

Another elephant in the room, perhaps (but one that I think would be fun/funny. And worth the price of admission... at least for me. I might just be weird). I feel like there would have to be a joke about selfies and Selphie's name. But I don't want them to modernize FFVIII with smart phones like they did FFVII. FFVIII takes place in an era akin to the Cold War, and that's where it should stay. But I've seen many a vintage post labeled something like "a selfie made before selfies were created!" Where a person, back in the day, seemingly did take a kind of selfie with cameras of old. And I think we could do that with FFVIII: the people of that world learn how to take selfies with their cameras, and they become a big hit. And Selphie says something like, "I was 'Selphie' before these 'selfies' ever existed. And I'm the best one that exists, don'chu know?" IDK.

Anyway, those are some of my thoughts for a Final Fantasy VIII remake, if one were to ever exist.

Feel free to add onto this if you have more:)

Edit: And this one y'all will either love or hate. But I believe it was Kitase who said that if they remade Final Fantasy VIII, they might play with the "Squall is Dead" theory. They wouldn't make it true or anything like that, but probably put some red herrings about it there and pay homage to it. I personally like this idea, think it's fun, and would like to see it if we ever did get said Remake. But I also completely understand why others would hate the idea.

[nervosims]

tank baby girl

Sims Tag

tagged by the lovely @esotheria-sims <3. finally done with exams so i have more time to sim!

1. What’s your favourite sims death?

death by flies. the thought of being picked apart into nothing is so deathmetal. i've always been partial to some body horror, i never kill my sims off though <3

2. Alpha CC or Maxis Match?

alpha all the way! i like to incorporate some maxis-match, but i just can't really vibe with the plastic-y aesthetic of ts4.

sims 2 pure maxis match is cute though!

3. Do you cheat when your sims gain weight?

absolutely not! i wish more of my sims were fat, actually. i love different bodyshapes (and it's the one thing that annoys me about ts2).

4. Do you use move objects?

dude when don't i

5. Favorite mod?

i'd say anything that makes the game look prettier; defaults, lighting mods, etc. i can play without any gameplay mods at all,,, just gimme the defaults!

6. First expansion/game/stuff pack you got?

sims 3 showtime! i got it before getting the base game because i didn't know you needed the base game. i remember watching quxxn and falling in love with it. still my fave expansion (yes i know it's shit)

7. Do you pronounce “live mode” like aLIVE or LIVing?

i simply don't <3. i mentally called it play mode and never realised this debate was even a thing lmao. but i'd say it like LIVing if i gave a fuck.

8. Who’s your favorite sim that you’ve made?

tbh i've never felt connected to any sim i've made. i made a legacy save in ts3 that got lost to corruption and just struggled to form connections to my sims ever since (there's something to unpack there). premades are safe because i know the game won't swallow them whole i guess.

9. Have you made a simself?

nope! i just don't think it'd fit. my ex-gf used to make me in the sims 4 and pose us together! she's probably drowning me in pools now though.

10. What sim traits do you give yourself?

probably absent-minded, artistic, clumsy, good sense of humour, and grumpy. but i have zero perception of myself so idk

11. Which is your favorite EA hair color?

they're all a bit grim so i can't decide

12. Favorite EA hair?

hairsweep! the og lesbian bayonetta. i never replace this mesh. it's just too good.

13. Favorite life stage?

adults (boo i know).

14. Are you a builder or are you in it for the gameplay?

i do a bit of both. i enjoy all aspects of the game and it's good for the brain to be able to switch.

15. Are you a CC creator?

a shitty one! i have a tag, but it's all stuff that nobody but me would put in their game (i'm yet to learn anything substantial lmao).

16. Do you have any simblr friends/a sim squad?

i'd like to hope i do!

17. What’s your favorite game? (1, 2, 3, or 4)

sims 2! it would be sims 3 but it's so impossible to play with semi-decent specs. the game is too poorly optimised, but it holds a special place in my heart.

18. Do you have any sims merch?

oh bro i wish. that'd be neat

19. Do you have a YouTube for sims?

i sure do! just speedbuilds, but i'm hoping to branch out into a full let's play when i'm finished w/ round 3 of strangetown lmao.

20. How has your “sim style” changed throughout your years of playing?

i'd say i care less about a sim being pretty. sims 3 sims were hideous, and i'd always edit them. but, with ts2, i kinda love how unhinged sims can look. so, even with strangetown, i wanted the sims to have unique features (circe's asymmetrical grin!). i love the genetics system.

bro, 12 y/o me wouldn't let gunnar's chinless profile fly.

21. What’s your Origin ID?

it's just nervosims! but i don't play ts4 so it's never used. my old origin got banned because me and my friends shared the password.

22. Who’s your favorite CC creator?

damn i can't choose only one </3. i love them all!

23. How long have you had a simblr?

i've had this simblr for a little over a year. but i've been in and out of simblr for around 3. i've been on tumblr for way longer (unfortunately). like, skeleton war, colour of the sky, superwholock tumblr.

24. How do you edit your pictures?

clip studio paint! i just add scanlines and a vignette. my reshade does the heavy lifting tbh. though, i'm trying to get pretty screenshots without it rn; my graphics driver is acting up and reshade isn't working for me.

25. What expansion/game/stuff pack do you want next?

in terms of existing packs? none. i like all the stuff i have now.

in terms of future packs? none. simmers are greedy as hell asking for more. enjoy the fucking game.

25. What expansion/game/stuff pack is your favorite so far?

showtime!!! idgaf if it's a bad expansion it holds a place in my heart.

i'm tagging @alexbgd @alice-in-strangetown @annieshowell @wi-fu and whoever else wants to. feel free, no rush <3

[blrbaileys]

Mob Vote and Minecraft Updates in General

*Edit:* Warning - Extensive rambling with no through line or halfway decent structure

Idk, I need a place to put my thoughts.

The original mob vote concept was cool, 4 unique and honestly kinda challenging looking mobs, we can vote on which gets added. I'm actually a fan of Phantoms, despite them being a nusiance to most I think having flying mobs is cool and they should add more mobs that just fly about.

And I actually liked the follow ups where the mobs were tied into biomes because it wasn't *about* the mobs, they were just nice tie ins. But at the point we're at now they have to force us to be excited about the "features" these mobs add and while they are somewhat cool features, they aren't really much in isolation.

The Sniffer could've been much cooler bundled with an extensive update to say, the Jungle or Desert biomes, or an actually interesting archeology update.

Or in the Glow Squid case, its a weird single use feature, they could have easily bundled the glowing sign effect into Glowstone Dust.

None of this is to say adding more mobs is the wrong choice, I think the opposite, we need more mobs which just, don't have features attached.

Ambient mobs, fireflys, birds flying overhead, snakes in the Desert, rats around structures, more variety in the oceans (actual variety, the differnt combos of Tropical Fish are a nice touch, but the mob is the same regardless)

Then as you do updates, you can add features to them where it makes sense, but tying the feature to the mob from the get go and then forcing a vote on it just means less features in the long run. And I'm not unaware as to why they do it this way, the mob vote gets people talking, I mean I'm talking about it right now so I guess I'm not helping but whatever at this point we are half way through the vote anyway.

The chatter, even that against the mob vote conceptually pushes Minecraft into our feeds, even the BBC are reporting on Minecraft LIVE and the mob vote cause its a story now.

I will say on a slightly other note, the whole "modders can make this in one day argument" is kinda flat. Modders usually have to make it for one version in one language on one platform. Mojang have to consider localisation, cross-compatibility, actually conceptualising the mob idea, etc. That's not to say Modders aren't incredibly hard working, they usually are, but if you're looking to call Mojang lazy I wouldn't do it based off just that.

This is already a long af post with little coherency but we're rolling with it.

I think really what I want to see, as a player since like, 2012, is Mojang just to make bolder moves in regards to the updates. I want them to change core gameplay mechanics and just, see what happens. And yeah last time was 1.9 and it divided the community into two distinct parts that exist today but we need something like that alongside 2 new wood types.

In regards to recent/planned changes to villagers and the netherite upgrade template, its clear they are trying to lengthen the "midgame" of Minecraft to capitalize on how most people play (that being they have a 2-3 week fixation on the game each year and then stop) This sucks, don't strech your midgame, extend your endgame.

Add more powerful mobs in a new dimension, make a place where even netherite armour feels like iron. I have no doubt it'd be a nightmare for new players so make it difficult to get to (like the totally-not-a-portal-frame in the ancient citys) make the overall gameplay loop of Minecraft longer.

I'm going to stop here for now, if I'm bored/procrastinating studies enough I should actually format some of these thoughts into something.

Anyway, boycott the mob vote, its unlikely to do anything, they truly don't have to care, but people made posters and played Poor Mans Poison over them, can you really still vote after that?

[drawnaghht]

So! I think I've figured out how to tag both the leosagi and leochi ships.

Since this is mainly a BLOG and not just a random social media page, it will be easier for me to organize the tags as if this were a more traditional blogging site. So I will be trying to keep the tags as few and as relevant as possible.

I'll be mainly using YuiNardo / yuinardo from now on for just the Yuichi Usagi/rottmnt Leo ship, and stuff like my own fanart. it's specifically "show x show" for me (Yuichi x Nardo, bc those are their unique names in their respective shows xD) and not some of the fan OC stuff

leosagi for the general 2003 Miyamoto Usagi/Leonardo ship but maybe also i.e. crossovers where ppl draw all the versions?

katanashipping also for 2003 leosagi? like I guess I'll decide based on how specific it gets (edit 1.05.23) definitely about 2003 leosagi, since that's where it originated from

I'll use 2003 leosagi when it gets more specific i.e. fanfic recs or longform comics which I wanna find later

Rise Leosagi for the 2018 versions that people have made their own, based on the Miyamoto/Leo ship (lol this might be difficult to retag, cuz I'm not sure what I've tagged with what anymore)

Sliderbunny for people's own versions of rottmnt Leo and (both romantic and platonic ships, cuz there aren't as many posts for this anymore)

and I guess Leochi for something more specific? like that's been the tag now for Leo/Yuichi but I'm not sure where it started from so idk how to use it but I guess I'll find out when I see more stuff in the tag lol. might use it just for reblogs/fanart but I’ll see

I can't remember any other names so those are it for now. I probably won’t use the longer names like Yuichi x Leo, Miyamoto x Leonardo etc just bc I find it tedious to use that many spaces in tags when tagging can be sorta annoying to do on mobile and then fix later on PC. I’m more of a “tag and go” kind of person and I like my tags to be easy to write.

like im sorry I write so much (I don't enjoy writing lenghty things) but i legit need to tag like an oldschool blog occasionally bc I ENJOY finding stuff on my own blog later. it just makes sense! it is so confusing going thru multiple tags for the same thing when it could have a singular tag. or a single new tag for a specific use. and I've forgotten to do that after using social media so much for so long lol

anyway this isn't that important i am just chillin and remembered that I thought of this and needed to post it so I wouldn't forget.

more related random thoughts under the cut!

Thinking of that, I guess the tag clogging starts to make sense, considering how much people are more used to the "tag clouds" popularized by twitter and instagram and social-media-like sites before those (the sites inbetween blogging and web 2.0, maybe, but didn't really use those as much so I don't remember either) + the confusion about what the og leosagi was (+ maybe general tmnt fandom confusion over various versions of media for the franchise)

lol it's gonna take a bit long but I'll reorganize the blog more once I have a bit of time on the side from other stuff. now it feels nice that this blog isn't actually that big yet. I don't use sideblogs very long usually and it's my first time actually making anything TMNT related for this long, so it'll be interesting seeing where this blog will go in general. like how it's probably been subtle that while this userhandle/blog started as a tMNT sideblog, I actually have started blogging more about Usagi Chronicles now bc I like the show. and idk what else I'll post if I have time but I will probs keep it as a reblog blog anyways!

I try not to write long blog posts on tumblr anymore but I think the whole "leosagi-leochi tag clogging" point brought up in the "Why do we ship leosagi" video is also just a good point abt how we don't really treat blogs like blogs anymore. every sort of behaviour online has become so influenced by the want to make it trend or have it at least be read at all ("social media" aspect of online behavior now) that even stuff like ao3, a fanfic site, will have tags like "AO3 algothithm, PLEASE be nice to me" when sites like that don't even HAVE algorhithms. it's interesting to think about but also a bit sad on the side because that "tag clouding" does seem to be the only way for some works to become noticed on the above-mentioned actual social media sites. this almost makes me miss sites like deviantart and blogger because things always felt more centralized and easy to find vs twitter, insta or occasionally even tumblr.

ANYWAY

lol all this just to organize my thoughts on ship tags

if you've read this far, lemme know if there are any other tags ppl use? or are there any other types of tagging conventions we should bring back i.e. mashing the names together?

[heartlites]

so, i suppose as a little update in the diary that is my tumblr blog.

out of all those books i bought, i've finished two and i'm on the third one. it's taking me much longer to finish the third one because it just didn't grip me like the first two books did. the one's i have finished are my darling dreadful thing by johanna van veen (highly recommend for a gripping gothic story) and the last story of mina lee by nancy jooyoun kim (also a good read, but didn't grip me as severely as the former).

i'm currently reading nura and the immortal palace by m.t. khan. i think it has fantastic world building with a lot of fantastical scenery and people, very fun and imaginative setting, but the writing style is a bit simpler. i think it's a book better suited for a tween to teen audience.

i tried painting yesterday once again. i picked up some small i believe 5"x5" canvases over the weekend to give myself something small to work on. i didn't like what i made, tbqh, and i did end up throwing it away. the acrylic paint set i have is kind of limited and didn't capture what i wanted and i think i've forgotten a lot of painting techniques. i don't remember how to work with acrylics much anymore. i used oil paints more in the past. i'm wondering if i should maybe look up some stuff to help me figure out and re-learn techniques. however, this does also have me thinking about digital art again because i wouldn't have to struggle w finding my colors/mixing paints or the clean up lol. i wish i could find my old tablet.

i'm excited for fall coming in, i want to try to spend some more time outside again but i've been struggling with a lot of pain, boredom, and loneliness since i fell. i can't do as much around the house and it's frustrating and leading to some boredom to me. i've turned to video games more but i'm currently feeling a little unsatisfied with them.

generally just kind of really depressed as a whole in life, though. so much stress and little way to relieve it. socially i feel crushed and devastated. i feel like some kind of creature trying to imitate humans. i feel so distant and disconnected. my therapist is retired and i still haven't found a new one. idk what to do

edit: oh! an addition. i started playing dead by daylight recently. it wasn't as scary or intimidating as i thought it'd be. it's also not really that scary. horror media has started to surround me in life more and more in my life and i'm unsure how i feel about it these days. its not as traumatic of an ordeal for me anymore but some of it i just do not "get" but i'm trying to make peace with the fact that i don't have to "get" everything. so far i think my favorite form of horror media i've engaged with is probably written/novel forms. suspense and mystery intrigues me and draws me in more.

[the-hype-dragon]

Books I read in June

Good god I got kinda burned out this month, I made the dumb decision to read a bunch of doorstoppers and made the mistake of forcing myself to finish a book I didn't think was that great.

uhhhhhh anyway here:

Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows by J.K. Rowling - reread, 3/5

Confession time: I've always kinda disliked DH and my opinion has not changed lmao, I thought it wrapped up the series okay but there are a lot of things I just don't like about and never have. On the other hand I'm one of those people who actually likes the epilogue. Had some genuinely great writing for a YA series and certainly was not a bad book, I just never had as good a time reading this as I did the other Potter books.

The Broken Sword by Poul Anderson - 2/5

There were things I liked about this while I was reading it but overall it was not an enjoyable experience and as I sit here typing this I can't even talk myself into saying there were any parts I really enjoyed, although I know I did WHILE I was reading it, or else I wouldn't have finished it. Like I would start to think "hmmm maybe I better DNF" and then something interesting would happen, rinse and repeat for 260 pages. I can't believe people think this is better than LOTR (which I am also not a huge fan of so don't @ me lmao). Yes I understood what Anderson was going for, I just didn't like it. Maybe I would have Gotten It if I was a man, who knows. There are like eighty covers of this book but I was blessed with a copy bearing the above image, which just... idk it's that distinct 70s-era corniness, I can't help but love it.

Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince by J.K. Rowling - reread, 4/5

I've always liked HBP but it's been a hot minute since I've read the latter half of the HP series and I forgot just how weak HBP's denouement is. That said it's still pretty entertaining and the cave sequence was as harrowing to read now as it was when I first read it back in 2005. Slughorn is my favorite Hogwarts professor, he's just so mundanely unlikable and imo a good example of Rowling's talent for character writing.

The Burning Stone by Kate Elliott - 5/5

For about 90% of the book I was willing to say this was just a solid 4/5, but the last chapter really blew my mind lmao and that's saying something because much of the rest of the book is full of crazy plot twists. I did have some issues with it like an increasingly dragging pace (thanks to the ever-growing cast of characters) but otherwise it's a pretty great book, the good parts are REALLY good and the few parts I had issues with weren't because they were outright bad but because the stuff happening wasn't really my cup of tea. Also this book is pretty poorly-edited (at least the 1999 edition I have) with many noticeable typos but that didn't detract TOO much from the story imo. Still pretty solid and the climax was amazing, ended up really loving it.

The Seventh Son by Reay Tannahill - DNF, 1/5

The War of the Roses was a legitimately interesting period of English history with actual larger-than-life personalities involved and not a single author I've read has been able to truly capture it effectively in fiction. My problem is basically this: in spite of what records exist about the women involved in the conflict very few authors manage to make them anything but man-obsessed nonentities, and most of these books focus (or over-focus, I'd argue) on the military campaigns. Anyway The Seventh Son is just more Richard III apologia and I hate that too. And in spite of a strong beginning focusing on the dumbass laws these idiots made to hoard as much power for themselves as possible (which I genuinely find interesting) it quickly devolved into typical boring historical fiction trying to flaw-scrub the men while also listing off the horrible ways men were legally allowed to treat their wives, and how not even women of high rank were exempt from this treatment. Made me feel physically ill. Overall disappointing.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

so now that I'm completely fried here are the books I plan to read in July:

The Dispossessed by Ursula K. Le Guin (which I started in the third week of June, but I was also trying to finish The Burning Stone and that took precedence)

A Good Man is Hard to Find by Flannery O'Connor

Child of Flame by Kate Elliott

Nine Layers of Sky by Liz Williams

And there may be others, sometimes I'm just seized by a whim and cannot stop it. But we'll see!!!