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loregoddess · 3 months

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A continuation of my observations of the Octo2 traveler's weaknesses from here, now with fun visual diagrams! The above diagram shows each character's "base kit" (the weapons and elements they have access to w/out a secondary job) on the top row, and their weaknesses from the Dolcinaea fight on the bottom row.

Note that Agnea can't be charmed in this fight, so we don't actually know what her weaknesses are, but given that she has wind as her main element and how the elemental weaknesses tend to work (fire and ice are strong against each other, wind and lightning are strong against each other, and light and dark are strong against each other--based on the other Octo2 cast's weaknesses, and on how CotC usually handles elemental weaknesses, and using Tressa's weaknesses for reference), we can assume Agnea has at least a weakness to lightning. (CotC specifically seems to support this, since one of Agnea's passive skills gives her a buff to her lightning defense, and most characters in CotC who have access to only one element tend to get passive skills that buff their defense against their element's weakness, so I feel confident in saying Agnea should have a weakness to lightning).

As I observed in my first post, all the characters' weapon weaknesses tend to be the "opposite" of whatever their base kit weapon is (in type, i.e. long-range weapon users tend to be weak to close-range weapons and vice versa). The sort of exception to this is daggers, which get treated as both a long- and close-range weapon (the dagger attack animation has a character throwing a dagger--ranged--but it can also be used to stab someone, which we see multiple times in various cutscenes across Octo1, Octo2, and CotC). This means it's hard to figure out what sort of weapon weakness Agnea might have because she only uses a dagger as her base kit weapon.

Now I already discussed patterns in weaknesses and other observations in my first post, so I won't reiterate anything here (although I will quickly add some very astute people noted in their tags that Hikari being the only one we know for sure is weak to lightning is probably a reference to the thing with Rai Mei, which I missed initially but makes so much sense). But I wanted to take a look at who could break who in the party to see if the battle mechanics tied in with characterization, and set up the following diagrams for each character, so I could really dig into weird details.

(Under the cut bc this entire post is so very long, and there are more diagrams; ALSO SPOILERS, I do talk about a few endgame spoilers)

We'll start with Ochette who's actually capable of breaking the most other travelers at six. The only person she can't seem to hit (by herself) is Partitio, which is an interesting detail.

It makes a lot of sense that Ochette is the best at breaking other characters, given that she's a hunter (needs to be able to find critical weak points as part of her job). I've also written in the past how I think Ochette is actually one of the most emotionally intelligent characters in the group, and that she's probably way more aware of what's going on with the other travelers than she lets on--and way more in-tune with them than even they realize--but her ability to break most of them actually seems to support that as well.

I feel this gets reflected in her interactions with the other travelers, since Ochette is one of the few characters Throne and Osvald are pretty open with from the get-go, despite both being a bit closed off to the other travelers at first; the same goes for Temenos, although he tends to mask the fact that he's closed off, so it isn't as obvious at first glance.

Ochette is also the only traveler who ever comes close to finding out about Hikari's Shadow, since she can smell it "in" him. Likewise for Castti, in their second crossed paths the Shadow is able to capture and almost kill Castti, but not Ochette--Castii has a connection to the Shadow due to her exposure to Trousseau's rain (and a mental weak spot from the trauma of loosing patients in the past), and therefore is weak to the Shadow, so it seems fitting that Ochette is the one to "break" Castti free from the Shadow's trap.

As for Agnea, there is the sense that the two are opposites in their athletic abilities, given that Ochette is a very athletic and sure-footed hunter, whereas Agnea, while certainly athletic, still stumbles on occasion despite her years of work.

It also makes sense that Partitio is the only one Ochette can't break, since Partitio's name is also the only name Ochette struggles with, and she doesn't ever use his full name. Despite having a nickname for every traveler except Temenos, in battle Ochette uses their full names after they break an enemy, with the exception of Partitio. After Partitio breaks an enemy, Ochette uses the nickname she gives him ("Good hunting Pardy!") which is, if I recall correctly, unique to Paritio. His job and the entire concept of money is also baffling to Ochette, despite Partitio's best efforts to explain it to her.

It's interesting to note as well that even Ochette's two starting partners, Akala and Mahina, can each break 6 of the other travelers on their own (Akala can break everyone--assuming Agnea does have a weapon weakness we don't know about yet--but Akala can't break Hikari, who's a master of combat; Mahina can break everyone except Osvald, who's a master of magic). By the end of Ochette's story when she has the creatures of legend, she can actually break everyone (Akala + Tera and Glacis who each have elemental attacks that Hikari's weak to), and while Mahina + Tera and Glacis can't break Osvald still, if Ochette were fighting alongside them rather than just provoking with them, she herself would be able to break Osvald.

Given that Ochette is one of the best characters for breaking enemies just from a game mechanics standpoint, it's neat that this is reflected in her ability to apparently break nearly all the other travelers.

Castti can only break four of the other travelers, which is on the lower end (although not the lowest), but this seems to fit since story-wise she's a healer first, a fighter second (despite making an excellent damage-dealer).

The characters she can't break are people she treats like kids (Ochette and Agnea), and Osvald, who's one of the characters to tell Castti to take care of herself. Osvald's also arguably her peer, in that he's the oldest of the group and occasionally a parental figure to the others in some sense, the same way Castti takes on a pseudo-parental role on occasion, so she can't really "parent" him because Osvald is both literally a parent and, to some degree, figuratively the group's parent.

Likewise, all the characters she can break are characters who either get into lots of fights (Paritio and Hikari), or characters who would probably pretend they're not as hurt as they actually are when they do get hurt, or otherwise mask their pain a lot (Throne and Temenos). We see this in some of Castti's banters where she chides Partitio for getting into fights (she also tends to tease him relentlessly, and he's one of the only characters she teases), or how she worries after Throne, giving her check-ups out of the blue in one of their banters. Castti also has a banter with Temenos after the events of his Stormhail chapter where she checks in on his wellbeing, and while he sort of manages to redirect her attention away from him by complementing how well she looks after people, the fact remains that she did know he needed to be checked in on.

Castti really said none of you are getting away with not getting treated for your hurts or so help her.

Throne, surprisingly, only can only break four of the other travelers. Despite being raised and trained as a deadly assassin, the low number of travelers she can break might reflect her narrative "aversion to blood and killing". Throne is, after all, able to non-lethally knock people out as her nighttime path action, so her unwillingness, and inability, to hurt her allies does make sense for her characterization.

The people she can't break make a lot of sense--Throne's unable to sneak up on Ochette in their banters, and is always open and kind with Ochette. She and Hikari share shadowy ancestry, and he's a skilled warrior, so it might be harder for her to find and opening and get the drop on him (esp. considering how his Shadow might react to their shared blood ties to D'arqest).

Agnea's entire character arc is more or less centered around trying to inspire hope in everyone she meets, and Throne herself hopes to be free, so it'd make sense for Throne to follow after Agnea's hope rather than trying to fight against her.

The people Throne can break are interesting as well, especially since she is the most effective against Temenos, covering 3/4 of his weaknesses with her base kit. Temenos really isn't able to hide any of his weaknesses against Throne, which makes sense given their interactions and teamwork in their crossed path story arc.

She's also one of the only characters to throw Castti off a few times (i.e. the banter where Throne almost talks Castti into letter her steal stuff from Timberain's royal family bc Throne thinks Castti would look pretty in the jewelry).

Throne also has a banter with Partitio where she gets him to realize how over-trusting he can be by talking him into letting her take the check from Alrond--which she doesn't do, but she definitely exploited a few of his social weaknesses and could have stolen the check from him easily, in front of his face no less. (Although if I recall correctly, Partitio then has her hold onto the check for safekeeping anyhow, just because he trusts her that much).

Osvald is a bit of a surprise, given how few weaknesses he has and how vigilant he seems to be, but Throne is a professional and given that Osvald was unable to escape prison without Emerald's help (who also seems to be a thief, given that he uses a dagger when playable), it makes sense that Throne could potentially get the better of him. There's also the fact that she's the granddaughter of D'arqest, and Osvald has spent his life investigating the source of D'arqest's magic, the answer to which eludes him till the very end of his story.

Osvald can break five of the other travelers, which is the second-most after Ochette. This matches well with his ability to scrutinize people, and his general observant nature.

He can't break Throne, which as noted previously, may be due to how close her blood-ties are to D'arqest. Studying the Pit of D'arqest and trying to figure out what the source of his magic was is Osvald's life study, the answer to which eludes him most of the story, so it does make sense that Throne, the granddaughter of D'arqest, would also elude him (esp. considering that while Osvald does learn about the Shadow, the answer he finds to the One True Magic is entirely separate and opposite to the Shadow). Hikari has the same blood-ties, but it's strongly implied he is a much further descendant of D'arqest than Throne is, so even though Hikari literally has the Shadow living in him, he's not tied to D'arqest the same way Throne is (as she's the daughter of Vide's "perfect vessel" and was raised in hopes that she could succeed as a vessel instead, even if this ultimately fails).

Osvald also can't break Temenos, which actually does reflect their general relationship well. In one of their banters, Osvald makes a note of how much Temenos talks without ever saying what his point is, and generally seems to find Temenos's whimsical façade to be a hassle to deal with on occasion. It's funny, in a way, that Temenos is one of the few people Osvald can't seem to figure out, but also speaks to each of their personalities--Osvald is honest bordering on rudeness, and always straightforward with how he speaks, whereas Temenos keeps a great deal of his inner thoughts and feelings to himself while speaking in a roundabout way, hiding what he actually wants to say behind stories from the scriptures or lighthearted jabs.

That Osvald can break everyone else reflects his observant nature, for sure, but it's also interesting that he can break characters like Agnea and Ochette, both of whom he treats as surrogate daughters to some level or another...though perhaps the fact that he can break them reflects his parenting style, wherein he wouldn't want to hold back any important lessons, even if they were somewhat unpleasant.

As noted before, Osvald's one of the few characters who points out how reckless Castti can be with her own health, so it makes sense he'd be able to break her. Hikari makes sense, given that he's trained in martial arts rather than magical arts, so Osvald and Hikari are strong in what the other is weak in. And, Partitio is open and honest, almost to a fault, which, like how Throne can get a good read on Partitio, probably makes Partitio fairly easy for Osvald to get a read on as well.

Like Osvald, Partitio can break five of the other travelers. This, paired with his distinct lack of weaknesses, does seem to reflect the fact that, despite being sincere and a starting off untraveled, Partitio is wicked smart and very aware of what's going on around him, skills he needs to be a successful merchant.

Partitio can't break Agnea as far as we know, which seems to reflect their banter where Partitio nearly gives her his money after she explains how she raised enough money to start traveling (Angea notably has enough money for her travels, it's Paritio who needs to come up with more money, but here he is trying to give her more money anyhow).

Partitio being unable to break Temenos may have to do with Partitio truly not being able to get a good read on Temenos because of how Temenos is (re: puts up a façade, keeps his feelings to himself, etc.), but there's also the shared banter between Castti, Partitio, Temenos, and Agnea where, a bit drunk and therefore letting his guard slip a bit, we see that Temenos can be rather cynical, as he shoots down the idea of new paper plays about their travels rather quickly. This puts his personality at odds with both Partitio and Agnea, who are unfailingly optimistic (and optimistic enough they eventually convince Temenos their idea isn't that naïve).

The fact that Partitio can break the rest of the party is just testament to his astuteness and flexibility as a merchant, since he can break more stoic characters like Osvald and Throne (Partitio hits it off pretty quickly with both, not even giving Throne a hard time for her thieving habits and instead bonding over their shared love of fashion, as any merchant good at networking might do), while also finding a way past Hikari's defenses (although Hikari's usually pretty straightforward on matters not related to his Shadow, so Partitio's able to connect with him pretty easily as well). As noted earlier, Partitio is the only character Ochette cannot break without one of her partners, and his name is the only one that really trips her up.

Partitio being able to break Castti comes as a bit of a surprise, given that the majority of their banters have Castti teasing Partitio or chiding him for his reckless behavior. There is the sense that Partitio respects Castti a great deal and is still paying attention to what she does, as seen in their banter during her Timberain chapter, where Paritio reminds Castti that her ability to convince the soldiers to get the people indoors to safety was due to her hard work, and that while it's true there's more for her to do, she shouldn't undersell the worth of all that she has already managed to achieve. From this, we get the sense that teasing and chiding aside, Partitio is still keeping tabs on Castti and is clearly able to get a read on her, even if he doesn't intervene as often in her personal affairs.

Despite being the only one whose weaknesses we don't know for certain, Agnea can break five other travelers as well. This makes sense from a game mechanics standpoint, since Dolcinaea is Agnea's boss fight and Agnea can't be charmed during the fight, so she ideally has to have a chance to break whoever Dolcinaea does charm. But this also reflects well how Agnea is able to win over so many people throughout her travels, as her pursuit of hope and desire to bring joy to people never wavers and inspires others.

The only two she can't break are Partitio and Throne. Given the infamous peaches banter, it makes sense Agnea can't break Partitio, since she didn't realize he was talking about the basket of peaches she was literally holding until the very end of the banter, and by then was too flustered to stick around (Partitio is, notably, clueless to the fact that Agnea thought he was talking about some entirely different peaches).

Throne makes sense as well because she's a slightly older, and definitely more experienced, woman than Agnea. As a country girl coming to the city, Agnea is ignorant to all of the dark things a city could hold, while Throne is a city girl who grew up literally in the shadows of all the wicked things in a city. Agnea's general ignorance puts her at a slight disadvantage to Throne's knowledge, although it should be noted that Throne is also inspired by Agnea's kindness and hope, and supports Agnea rather than looking down on her ignorance and naivety.

While we can assume that Agnea can break most of the other travelers for battle mechanics purposes, and to make sure the player has a chance to retrieve the charmed character even if Agnea is the only character they have to do that, it is interesting that she can break most of the characters from a narrative standpoint.

Characters like Osvald and Castti treat Agnea like a kid (Agnea seems to be a surrogate daughter to Osvald specifically), so it could be she's able to get to both of them because they want to dote on her a bit like a parent might (although for Castti, the resident healer, the fact that Agnea can break her might be due to Agnea's habit of occassionally rushing into things that causes some vexation to Castti).

Temenos notably has a difficult time communicating with Agnea, so Agnea's ability to break him could have something to do with the fact that Temenos is never able to get his point across to Agnea in a few of their banters (i.e. when Agnea forgets that he's the inquisitor and thinks his job is that of a detective or a paper play artist, and all of Temenos's attempts to correct her fail; likewise his attempt to get Agnea to take care of herself--before helping Laila get new shoes--via a story of Aelfric goes right over Agnea's head). It's not so much that Agnea is that naïve, but rather Temenos's roundabout way of doing things seems to make it more difficult for him to communicate clearly with her.

Agnea being able to break Hikari could be explained as well by her unwavering optimism and journey for hope. Compared to Hikari's childhood, Agnea hasn't experienced the same hardships, so her belief in bringing joy and happiness to people may seem naïve at first. But Hikari's entire end-goal for Ku isn't that different, as he wishes for peace and prosperity and an end to the bloodshed and war that's plagued his country and torn asunder his family and the families of his people. So despite the fact that Agnea's coming from an entirely different set of life experiences, her desire to bring about a more hopeful, brighter future aligns with Hikari's own desire for a better future, so it makes sense then that Agnea could break through to Hikari because he believes deeply in her vision even before he meets her. (This is also somewhat reflected in Mikka and Pala's side story in the postgame, as it's Pala who's able to break through to Mikka).

Ochette's the most surprising, although Agnea is one of the first travelers to share cooked food with Ochette in one of their early banters, so in the realm of food at least Agnea knows ways to prepare it that Ochette loves (even though Castti also later cooks for Ochette but can't break her). There's also the banter in Agnea's final chapter where Ochette talks about how much she loves Gil's piano playing, and she mentions several times how much she enjoys Agnea's dances and singing, so it could be that Ochette is weak to the performing arts.

Temenos has the fewest number of travelers that he can break, making him the opposite of Ochette. Now, technically he could break every traveler with his latent ability, but without putting in the extra effort he's not able to break most of the others. This is interesting considering his entire thing is being able to get information by talking with people (the coerce nighttime path action, despite being a battle, is probably supposed to be a metaphor for the "mental battle" waged when trying to get information from someone). Despite his acuity with detective work and unravelling mysteries, he has quite the difficult time unravelling his traveling companions. It's possible that, like Castti, this actually reflects the fact that he is a healer technically (even if, in Temenos's shared banter with Castti and Partitio, Partitio suggests that Temenos's "healing" style focuses more on the spirit, rather than physical wounds the way Castti's healing does).

Who he can break are interesting choices. Throne is the least surprising, since the two are opposites while being quite alike, although Temenos notably can only hit one of Throne's weaknesses while she can hit most of his.

Meanwhile, Ochette is probably one of the least deceptive travelers, never hiding much of anything, so it could be Temenos has an easier time reading her because she's straightforward with her thoughts and feelings pretty much all the time. This might explain why Temenos can break Partitio as well, since while Partitio is capable of using his merchant's gift of rhetoric to inspire people to his cause, he is incredibly honest, straightforward, and open about himself as well, and very trusting of other people (the opposite of Temenos's innate doubt).

If we work off the idea that Temenos has an easier time reading Ochette and Partitio because of their openness, then most of the characters Temenos can't break make sense. Hikari, while not outright deceptive, never tells any of the other party members about his struggles with his Shadow (although he comes close and talks about it indirectly with Temenos and Castti in one of their banters), and therefore we can say that Hikari is somewhat secretive and very good at keeping his secrets.

Castti likewise, while she's not trying to keep secrets intentionally and also isn't deceptive, suffers amnesia and can't remember much of anything of her past at the start of her story (Temenos can't inquire about something someone doesn't know). Even after she regains her memories, it's hard to say how openly Castti would discuss her experiences or not, since we don't see them brought up in detail during her travel banters often.

Osvald doesn't keep anything secret, on purpose or accident, and is very straightforward when he speaks, but he's also taciturn and prefers not to chat, so it makes sense Temenos would have a hard time breaking him since Temenos can't learn something from someone who won't talk to him, and there's the general impression that even Osvald's body language is a bit withdrawn (I say "general impression" bc despite the limits of sprite art, Osvald doesn't move around as expressively or actively as other characters like Ochette or Angea, and even his unique Bewildering Grace dance is the most restrained of the eight).

As noted earlier Temenos also has a difficult time communicating his point to Agnea in several of their shared banters. It should be noted as well that Agnea is the youngest character in the group, and Temenos tends to be "weak" to children, with how he lets Ochette talk him into reading Acta a story because Acta is a baby, or with the children of his church teasing him for his mistakes in his paper plays (although I think his mistakes are intentional, as I explained in this post here, but Temenos does seem to have something of a soft spot for children, possibly because they tend to be more honest or possibly because he takes his duties teaching/guiding them more seriously than he lets on).

Surprisingly, despite his martial prowess, Hikari can only break four other travelers. Like we see with Throne, this could speak to his nature, as Hikari is very kindhearted and values his friends dearly, and his desire not to hurt anyone but especially the people he cares about is what allows Hikari to stave off, and eventually defeat, his Shadow. Indeed, like how Castti is a healer first, fighter second, there's the impression that Hikari--despite being a warrior--is a protector first, and a warrior second.

Hikari can't break Castti, which is interesting, because Castti was "infected" by Trousseau's poison rain and carried a bit of the Shadow around with her, it's possible Hikari couldn't break her even if he wanted due to his blood curse. Likewise Hikari can't break Throne, just as she can't break him, and with their shared blood ties to D'arqest and Vide, and I wonder how much of the Shadow being something of an offshoot, or "servant", to Vide, alongside Throne being the daughter of Vide's intended perfect vessel, potentially has to do with this.

Hikari's Shadow, and Castti and Throne's connections to it, don't explain why he can't break Agnea, but it could be that Agnea's earnest journey for hope and continual optimism even in the face of darkness is something he respects enough that he would never and could never bring himself to harm her, since he believes deeply in her vision of hope.

It's interesting then that he can break Ochette, who is canonically the character who seems to be closest to the Flame, but at the same time both are warriors of a sort, so it could be more of a friendly sparring thing. Osvald makes some sense, in that Hikari is a master of physical combat and Osvald is not, so naturally they're both weak to what the other is skilled in.

Partitio is a bit surprising, but if we take into considering that it's implied Partitio gets into fights on impulse due to being a bit hot-blooded, it does make sense that Hikari, who's always cool and calm under a fight (when he isn't staving off the Shadow) could get the upper hand on Paritio if they sparred.

Hikari being able to break Temenos makes sense in regards to his shared banter with Temenos and Throne, where the three play poker and try to needle each other into giving up, with Throne and Temenos failing to throw each other off, before Hikari ultimately gets them both to give up the game, potentially getting Temenos to cry in the process (which is an incredible feat on Hikari's part, given that Temenos is never shown or implied to cry during the events of his story despite two people he cared deeply about being murdered, and just how careful Temenos is in general with keeping up a certain façade around others).

One last thing I'd like to talk about is the number of other travelers each traveler is weak to, which I think has more to do with game mechanics than with characterization. Every character is weak to five other characters, with the exception of Throne and Partitio who are only weak to four. This is really excellent in terms of mechanics balancing, since the only reason these weaknesses exist is because characters can be charmed during the Dolcinaea fight, so it makes sense that the player should be given a fair shot to break the charmed character with whichever team setup they went into the battle with, especially so for players who go in blind.

Agnea obviously is the major exception to this, being unable to be charmed means we can at best guess at her weaknesses. Which is fitting because the player wouldn't have to worry about losing Agnea in the battle (and generally speaking, in my experience Agnea's usually able to output enough damage by this point in the game that she can retrieve the charmed character with a fully boosted attack without even needing to break them, meaning I, as the player, didn't even have to really worry about who Dolcinaea charmed in terms of strategy). In theory if she could have been charmed, I imagine she would have had 4-5 characters who could break her with their base kit, just for gameplay balancing purposes.

Aaand, that's...all I think I wanted to jot down for my continued observations. With the bonus battle updates to Octo2, I plan to put together a similar post (or two) for the Octo1 travelers, since we now have access to their weaknesses as well. I'm still not trying to make any point per se, just rambling on things I observed and how the game mechanics seem to tie in with story characterization, which I always think is a neat thing when it occurs in games. Thanks for reading if you made it this far, bc this got way longer than I was expecting!

#octopath traveler #octopath traveler 2 #octopath ii #I finally finished this! finally!#*lies on ground*#but I still have lots of thoughts so after a short break I'm sure I'll be writing stuff for Octopath again in no time #game mechanics tying in with narrative elements my beloved ~ <3 #apologies for any weird typos though I've been writing this for a couple of weeks now & honestly have probably been looking at it too long #oracle of lore

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momentomori24 · 2 months

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Keiji is a character that I'm pretty sure every one of us can recognize is an absolute weirdo (ok maybe some are too hard on copium for the "weirdo" part) and sketchy as hell, but thinking about everything he's done it really feels like he's so much shady and ruthless than we give him credit for. So here's me bulletpointing some the moments that I haven't seen too many talk about, a little theory throwing his status into question and addressing the massive elephant in the room that almost everyone refuses to acknowledge. If there's something else you feel I missed or wanted to evaluate on, do leave it in the comments.

[Also, disclaimer: I will be discussing Keiji and Sara in a romantic light near the end of this post, so if that makes you uncomfortable please proceed with caution or skip entirely. This should go without saying but for my own sake I will say it anyway-- No, I do not condone their relationship in real life. No, this is not meant to be "shippy" or endorsement of any kind. This will simply be pointing out their dynamic as another example to prove the whole point of this rant. But if someone else does ship them that's totally fine. Fiction doesn't equal reality and if you harass a real person over fictional characters you will not see the light of heaven. Be civil, please and thank you. My block button is rated E for Everyone and if anyone decides to ignore the warnings and be an asshole I won't hesitate to use it. Thanks for listening. Disclaimer over.]

*Being a murderer.

I feel like I should start with the most obvious and undeniable. I don't think this is debatable to anyone here. Mr. Policeman may have been an accident and kinda confirmed by Midori to have been set up, but he still shot and killed an unarmed man in a moment of panic and recklessness. Even putting that aside, there's no denying that he killed Megumi in cold blood to get out of his debt to her and covered it up to the group to preserve his credibility. Regardless of what you think of Megumi, he has no excuse here. Not only is he one more kill away from being a serial killer, he's the only participant in our group that has actually killed people directly aside from Alice. Another reason why I bring this up is cuz something that completely flew over my head is this:

At the start of the game he had the audacity to complain about not having a partner or someone he knows with him like Sara does as if he didn't literally let Megumi get ripped apart by chains probably not even an hour ago Keiji what the hell--

*Throwing Kanna under the bus repeatedly.

Despite positioning himself as a protector and someone to rely on, he's far from above putting their youngest members in danger. Next to voting for the fourteen year old girl to die, he had the great idea of letting said fourteen year old be the one to babysit their biggest liability. Up to the point where they would stay in the same room both day and night. While I absolutely 100% trust that Sou would never EVER do anything to her, Keiji had no guarantee of that when he send her off. Hell, he literally just got done accusing Sou of setting Joe up to die (which I don't believe almost solely based on the fact that he said it, more on that another time maybe). He knew Sou was bad news, and openly acknowledges how adults can be terrifying, but he did it anyway. The dubiety of throwing the already traumatised little girl to keep watch on what they thought to be the most dangerous adult that had manipulated her once before is not lost on me, and that he didn't take any responsibility for her afterwards isn't lost on me either. To be fair, the Sou and Kanna thing doesn't just fall on him, it falls on everybody (Alice gets a pass because he actually swapped out with Kanna to watch Sou for her), but he was the one with the final say on the matter and who encouraged her to take the role despite Reko's rightful protests. The fact that he also voted for her to die in the Main Game, and is the only adult to do so, doesn’t help his case.

*Attempting to frame Sou knowing Reko was actually responsible.

While you could argue he was trying to cover for her since he knew why she did what she did, trying to pin this act on Sou to cast more doubt on his is extremely shitty. Never mind the blatant corruption and the irony of a supposed man of the law abusing his power to knowingly frame an innocent person (in this situation at least), and him sowing more seeds of confusion and resentment within an already rattled group, and giving Sou legitimate reason to be suspicious of him (and by extension Sara)-- this makes it so difficult to trust him after realising he's done this. Literally every time he accuses someone of being or doing something suspicious (mostly Sou), I always have to think in the back of my head if he’s telling the truth or just telling a blatant lie. He's shown that he's willing to not only lie to cover for himself, but to lie to delegitimize someone else. And Sara never caught onto it (Sou and maybe even Nao likely did tho). She never openly acknowledged it-- No one did. The complete lack of mention of what he did here makes this action quite missable. Hell, I didn't even catch it the first time. Has he done this before? Who else has he lied about? Who else would he lie about? Who else would he knowingly pit against the group? You don't have to wait for that answer, because I will provide an example later. And with "later", I mean now.

*Casting suspicion on Gin before the vote while hiding the fact that he killed Megumi.

While it's not as blatant as with Kanna, there are two instances where Keiji shows a readiness to either put or leave Gin in harm's way. The biggest one for me is in the Main Game. Like, how dare you. That is a furry child, sir. This kid’s like TWELVE. Even though he makes a valid point about calling out suspicious actions to clear them up so we can all trust each other, casting doubt on Gin of all people right there feels pretty screwed to me. This was before the preliminary vote. His words could’ve very well gotten Gin voted for if he couldn’t disclose why he did what he did for whatever reason and therefore being unable to clear himself from suspicion. It’s even more fucked when you realise that Keiji has literally murdered his partner and is currently planning to get Sou killed while giving this whole spiel about doubting others so that we can believe them and pointing the finger at a little kid to make an example to the group. But when Nao, Sou and Sara call him out on his suspicious actions that could rightfully damage his credibility, he tries to shut them down completely. My brother in Christ, you brought it on FIRST (don’t get me wrong I’m very much aware he didn’t really mean the whole “trusting each other” bit but come on dude)--

Speaking about not meaning what he says:

*Letting the group think he’s Ok to vote for knowing he’s the Keymaster.

This kinda got to me because I thought this was Keiji actually being… vulnerable? Accepting the consequences of his actions and allowing them to vote for him in their distrust without protest even tho it could cost him his life, maybe. Correct me if I’m wrong, but I can’t remember a lot of times-- or any times, really-- where Keiji has willing put himself into the line of fire, at this point at least. He always finds a way to keep himself safe, give himself insurance, and I thought that this would be the one time he doesn’t do that. But this feels so ominous looking back knowing that he was the Keymaster the whole time. That our distrust and betrayal and his resignation to it all didn’t matter because he was going to be safe no matter what. That he knowingly allowed us to assume that he was a safe vote because he didn’t want his plan to kill Sou to be ruined, which narrowed down choice of people we can safely vote for even further. That this action is ultimately the reason why Sou and Kanna were our only options to kill off in the end. If he had admitted it there, we could’ve found someone else to vote for so our final options could consist of three people, not two. But he didn’t, and the rest is history. There’s a lot of things he’s done I can’t get over. This one ranks pretty high. The second Main Game is already a huge sore spot for me for obvious reasons; knowing that a lot of the things that happened were due to his inaction where it truly mattered and activity in all the wrong places doesn’t make me fee any better. He didn't say he was a safe vote-- he didn't lie-- but his words carefully omit that voting for him means a total party death, something he should've stated then (and before this, really).

*Leaving Sara with the sacrifice card.

Despite making a big show about “always being by her side” and being her “reliable policeman”, he chose to look away when she was in real danger. He attached himself to her as her right hand man, made her shoulder the responsibility of being the leader, constantly manipulated and flattered her to win her trust and gain her favour-- but when she needed him the most, he basically left her for dead because it was the most beneficial to him. Keep in mind that not only did he know about her getting the sacrifice (he was also the sage so he'd have seen the trade happen), but he had the tokens to help her get rid of it. But those tokens weren’t for her life. They were for his. He used them instead to give himself the Keymaster as insurance for the Main Game (the Keymaster he stole from Sou/Kanna most likely to buy Sara’s trust btw). His desperation for survival outweighed his sense of obligation to keep her safe, and that’s the most subtle yet transparent he’s been about his selfishness. What makes this so much worse is that Keiji is our support character. He’s an ally, and our closest one at that, to the point where Sara burned her hands in a futile attempt to rescue him and signed her life away to save his. And yet his loyalty and protectiveness pale in comparison to other characters. Compare his actions to Sou’s: one of their many parallels and similarities is that both their girls get hit with the sacrifice card. As we’ve established, Keiji was fully aware of Sara being send the sacrifice by Sou, had 50 tokens ready to go and chose to secure his own survival than save her life. Kanna ended up doing it instead, attempting to trade the card off Sara with Sou realising what happened immediately. And what does Sou do? Completely bend over backwards trying to keep her alive. He lied about being the Sacrifice so the others wouldn’t suspect Kanna of having that role, meaning he could try gathering vote for her without anyone seeing his true intentions. He tried to stop her about coming out with the truth of what she had done so she doesn’t sentence herself to death. After everything he did to survive-- after how much he lied, how much he schemed, how much he hurt, and how he had thrown himself away to replace everything that made him Shin with the man that had traumatised him years before the game began to scrape together even the tiniest chance to survive-- he threw it all to the wind and was willing to let it all be in vain if it meant she got to make it out of the Main Game alive. The worst part is that Sou had never intended to make it through that Main Game. He confessed to already knowing that Kanna would choose Sara over him if she truly had the Sacrifice card. Yet he still did what he did all in the hopes that she could win. Because it was all about her survival first, not about them surviving together.

It also gives a different context to Sou's panic and him stumbling over his words trying to come up with any argument to get them to stop. At first I thought that Sou was afraid for his life. Which would make sense-- Keiji and Q-taro set him up to die and seemed pretty adamant on having everyone voting for him to get it all over with. But he was already prepared to die the minute he realised Kanna traded with Sara. So it means it wasn’t his life he was fearing for here-- it was hers. To him, if they voted for him there, it wouldn’t have just been his end but hers too. But we know that Kanna isn’t the one who has the sacrifice. It’s Nao, and considering how the Main Game can end either or both of them dead, I wonder if he regrets not having given up there, not letting Keiji get away with that shitty stunt he pulled knowing it would’ve at least guaranteed her safety than leave her fate in hands of a girl with enough reason to kill her. Ignoring the sounds of my heart shattering into pieces for the 100th time thinking about the Greenblings, it’s so fascinating that our biggest rival and most distrusted member has a greater sense of loyalty and responsibility for his ally than Keiji has for his own. Sou can be a liar and manipulative and selfish, but for how unpredictable he is something I can always trust is his love for those he holds dear (Kanna) and general desire to protect our most vulnerable (Gin). Sou loves Kanna, and so he’s fine with protecting her even if it comes at a price he never wanted to pay. Keiji surely cares about Sara, but unfortunately that is something I can’t say about him-- at least at that time (also the fact that Sou ended up taking more care and responsibility for Kanna despite Keiji having been the one to throw her on him in the first is so ironic).

*Continuously pushing Sara to take on the role of leader.

I think one of Keiji's biggest failures in the game come from his treatment of Sara despite positioning himself as her most reliable ally and her partner. From the very get-go, he was very adamant of making Sara be the one to shoulder the responsibility of the group. He, along with Joe (he didn't do anything wrong here), pushed Sara to be the Challenger during the Russian Roulette, despite Q-taro and Kai being readily available. He made Sara be the one to interrogate the suspicious convict while distancing himself from the situation. And he encourages her to lead them through the Main Game, lets her make the choices that steer them all forward and as a consequence take the fall for them as well. Rather than take on the role himself, or let another adult take it, he places his full trust in her and makes her shoulder everyone's weight so he doesn't have to. And he can see the effect it has on her: having horrific hallucinations due to the immense guilt she feels. But having Sara as their leader gives him a greater shot at survival and helps his credibility, so even though he tries to provide her comfort he still continues to keep her in that role. Again, the high schooler taking responsibility for the adults falls on a lot of the older people here, but Keiji was the one who kickstarted it rather than just go along with it like everyone else had. Gin, Nao, Kanna, Reko and even fucking Sou to an extent all have moments where they take the burden off her and relieve her of that pain she shoulders all the time (or at least try to). I need Keiji to take more responsibility for both the group and for her.

*Pitting Sara and Joe against each other.

This is just another example of the previous point. This isn't as bad, and I could give him the benefit of the doubt that this might have not been intentional, but it's something I want to bring up regardless. I'll be the first to say that Keiji wasn't wrong here. Prying into everyone's votes is a very bad move, especially since no one knew that Mishima would actually die (it was introduced as a practice round, after all). I agree with him, Joe was being rash, but instead of leaving the conversation there, he decided to throw Sara into it to pick a side. Which is... not good. He already won the argument and already had Reko on his side. Bringing in Sara could not only make Joe feel worse and potentially strain their relationship (especially if she rightfully chooses Keiji's side like he was expecting and hoping for), but just puts Sara in the spotlight during something she doesn't want to be part of. While there's a chance he might've done this because he know Joe is more likely to listen to her than him, he should've known better than that. It again makes her take the responsibility of giving the final verdict that would've otherwise gone to him.

*Asking Sara to take responsibility for his life

I've got nothing other that the grown adult swearing his life to the grieving, unstable teenager to take responsibility for while asking her if she'd die along with him is weird as heck. Keiji's said weirder things prior to this, but this one is a different weird. I think Beanieman's post mostly echoes my thoughts on this on, so I'll link it here for this point. This part kinda bothers me:

He shouldn't be encouraging her taking on anymore responsibility than she already is. He knows that the deaths that happened under her leadership haunt her. He knows that she's very much unstable enough already, to the point where he takes baby-steps to avoid triggering her trauma over Joe. He positioned himself as her reliable partner, her rock to lean on (quite literally sometimes). We see first hand how emotionally dependent she is on him. If he died, it would destroy her-- she'd destroy herself over it. He knows this (or should) but he still does it. His disappointment and dismissiveness when she understandably rejects him makes it worse. The guilt of potentially not living up to his expectations is not what she needs.

*Potentially working for Asunaro

This is more ambiguous than everything else here and more a theory than anything but it's been on my mind for a long time that Ranmaru might actually be onto something here. We know that Asunaro has a strong hold on the police. Midori was able to infiltrate the force, and they were able to get rid of Mr. Policeman for looking into the corruption going on, first having Megumi fire him and secondly getting Keiji to kill him by planting false info about the suspect having a gun. Megumi was also able to get Keiji off the hook for murder, which I believe Asunaro had a hand in too (I theorize this might've been her wish). There's also Alice, who was arrested and sent to prison despite the fact that he (legally) didn't kill anyone since Midori was a doll. The police are connected to Asunaro-- by extension Megumi and extending further potentially Keiji.

Something I've seen someone rightfully point out is that neither of the options you're given to say in response to the accusation... actually deny it? Both choices dance around answering directly, which is suspect as fuck. If Keiji truly wasn't with Asunaro, why not shut that theory down immediately? There's no benefit to answering anything but "no" when he's innocent, and he's lied straight to people's faces for less. So why not just debunk it? I think it's cuz there might be some truth to what Ranmaru was saying here. The biggest reason I think this is because despite the fact that Keiji quit the force, he and Megumi were still associating with each other years later. They were kidnapped together and partnered up for their first trial. One missable piece of dialogue is Keiji admitting that he was with his partner-- or rather a "coworker"-- before getting knocked out.

That slip of the tongue and backtracking makes me believe this part to be true. Him switching from "my partner" to "a coworker", which is a lot more distant and impersonal, makes me think it's got to be Megumi. However, I don't believe that Keiji would wanna keep in touch with her after what happened willingly, so I can only imagine that it's due to that debt he has to her. My little game theory here is that after the shooting, the debt he owed her was a forced recruitment into Asunaro. It's the only thing I can imagine he meant by "the worst kind of debt", a debt he'd literally let her die for to get out of. And if this is true, then it could also explain away his instant attachment to Sara, since he'd know beforehand that she's someone he can depend on due to her having the highest chance at survival. Maybe he already knew about her beforehand, one way or the other. We know Hayasaka did (which I think we as a fandom moved on from way too fast btw). Kai and Sou did too. There's always a chance. And unlike Sou's victory rate and Midori's favourite number, it's not zero. One person made a comic about this idea I recommend checking it out, it's tastefully unsettling. But still very much unsetling and uncomfortale. Be warned that it's also Keisara-centred, so if that makes you even more uncomfortable they did the job right you can ignore it. Proceed with caution or don't read if you don't like.

*Being a predator

I have been waiting so long for this one XD For context: a while ago I made a longpost discussing the sanitisation of soushin and this kind of toxic attitudes in fandoms regarding "problematic content" (ships, characters, shows, you name it). In it, I mentioned that it's not only soushin that receives this treatment but a certain other dynamic too. It's not a rainy day, however this has been way overdue and if I don't get this done now I never will.

Something I've seen a lot, and I mean a LOT-LOT is this notion that Keiji acts "like a father" to Sara and that their relationship is a completely platonic father-daughter bond and that he's the resident dad of the group? Like, it's cute, but that's not at all what their relationship is. At all. Not even a little bit. We called Sou and Kanna siblings before the Greenblings reveal. The difference is that not only does half the fandom think this man is gay, but he's only ever been protective and caring and loving without any romantic intentions towards Kanna ever. His title as her brother was deserved, based on the genuine affection and platonic protectiveness similar to that of Alice's. Keiji has made advances tho, on many occasions, and his flirting is repeatedly acknowledged by other characters. Namely Sou and Reko.

(Sou grills him for being a creep every chance he gets I love him XD) But yeah, these are not the type of reactions and comments you receive when being a "father-figure" to the teenager. You get all this when you hit on the teenager. Which he does all the time by calling her "cute" every time she asks something and his "cute little detective", swearing himself to her by saying that "he's always on her side" or something like that, asking her if she'd die alongside him, repeatedly claiming or insinuating that they're on a date, or ""having a moment"" and going to ""take the next step"" when in private (*cough* groomer *cough*)-- you name it, he likely said it. He's a walking-talking ladykiller machine and teenage girls aren't safe, apparently.

(Quick note: The dialogue for the Russian Roulette one is a tad different now. In the new translation he says "cause you're so darn cute" now. I dunno if that makes it sound any less weird, but I felt like putting that out there. What I'm also putting out there is that according to the trivia he calls her cute 8 times throughout the game so. Yeah. *Cough* groomer *COUGH COUGH*)

Like, who tf says this?? Especially that last part 💀 Even if you wanna die on the hill that these are supposed to be "jokes" not to be taken seriously, we should all be able to agree that the (ex)police officer in his late 20s jokingly hitting on the high schooler he follows around is still weirdo behaviour at best and down right despicable at worst. The fandom seeing lowkey predatory/inappropriate behaviour from a figure of authority persistent for almost three entire chapters and dismissing it as "fatherly" and "platonic" is, well, concerning. It's very concerning. If your dad acts like Keiji, you should probably call the police. Unfortunately for Sara, Keiji is the police. And considering this guy got away with manslaughter, I don't think said police would do anything anywho. But yeah-- he uses flattery and flirting to distract her from prodding to much at him while simultaneously aiming to gain favour in her eyes. He showers her with reassurance of his loyalty and affirmation of his deeper attachment towards her and her alone every chance he gets to cement his position as her closest and most trustworthy ally. He insinuates a romantic partnership between them to others to mostly keep her to himself or the two of them alone (he always does that when they're investigating or going to investigate by themselves). There's such an obvious romantic undertone to their relationship and his actions that it going almost completely ignored in the fandom feels weird to me.

I want to make clear that there's nothing wrong with headcanoning Keiji as a father figure to Sara. It's cute. Keiji didn't have a dad himself, and the closest thing to a father figure he had was the man he shot dead. He's a damaged and hardened guy. But Sara's dad is involved with Asunaro and Gin's is an alcoholic, and in a situation where they both need guidence and protection he tries his best to grow and change, fumbling to become that decent father none of them got to have. It's nice, and a wholesome dynamic for our "characters with memorandum counterparts and only non-determined deaths" trio. But that's obviously not what their dynamic is. There's a difference between headcanoning something and erasing canon and the Yttd fandom leans heavily into the latter. Keiji's a creep, he always has been, yet 90% of people I see always portray him as a Mr. Dad Guy or completely sanitise him to hell when him being creepy and unnerving to be around is what made him such a fascinating character. Just like I said with Soushin, the sanitisation to make canon more digestible is one thing: harassing or insulting the people that explore canon is another. I'm gonna take a bullet, derail this rant and say it-- Keisara shippers get so much shit for literally being right it's so infuriating. Keiji does hit on Sara, a lot. He's creepy and weird like that. Him flirting with her isn't a "mistranslation" or a joke or anything like that; his dubious wording and antics are very much intentional. Yet the only people I see actually addressing and acknowledging that without adding fluff is keisara shippers and other ""proshippers"" only for them to get fucking sniped for it I cannot 💀💀 I have yet to meet a single eastern fan who calls this cop "fatherly". This really feels like such a western issue cuz the majority of the japanese fandom agrees that this man's a predator (correct me if i'm wrong but keisara is the most popular ship in the japanese side of the fandom, right?). Then again, eastern fandoms are more chill over there when it comes to separating fiction and reality in general anywho.

*Yeah, I think I'm done with the Keiji slander. Yay. Time to unceremoniously end this.

There's more to say about that, but this is a Keiji post, not another shipping discourse post (although it's hard discussing Keiji's predatory behaviour without bringing it up too). Before I do spiral from the original point, I'm going to try and reach some sort of conclusion here. While I did spent the majority of this post just reading Keiji to filth, and am very salty towards him in particular, this was not just to rake him through mud for my own sanity (tho it's part of it XD). Keiji's character is that he started off as someone who wanted to do the right thing, someone who wanted to be good and moral and protect others by joining the force only to kill all the progress he made along with the person who inspired him to become an officer in the first place. It heavily contrasts the Keiji we have now, a sleazy, unreliable and corrupt ex detective who flirts with underage girls and is willing to resort to the most bankrupt of decisions to save himself. A man that has long lost hope of his wounds healing that he lets them fester and his rot spread onto others. And while I headcanon Keiji to just inherently be a piece of shit, his former self tried his best to be genuinely good before he became so convinced he can never be better that he made peace with his shittiness in the end.

With all this I wanted to highlight some the shadier and bankrupt things he's done that I haven't seen much discussion around and refresh myself on them before the final part. Both so no matter how emotionally dependent and therefore rose-tinted Sara is about the man I don't forget what he's actually like and what he's done while also being able to appreciate how much he's changed for the better. Some of my favourite examples about how he's changed are these:

Before the second Main Game Keiji was willing to let Sara and Kanna die because it was the most beneficial option for him, but in Chapter 3 he takes the on the role of "it" from Kanna and refuses to tag Sara when he thought he was gonna die after failing to beat Midori.

Actually showing more sympathy towards Sou after the Main Game. He was very mean about dismantling his pretence of a cold front to Kanna's death, don't get me wrong, but he showed a lot more consideration and understanding for Sou's feelings and acknowledgement about his active role in it than he ever had beforehand.

He was genuinely fighting for everyone to survive the game, not just himself. While Keiji would prefer everyone making it out safely, he has a tendency to guarantee his own survival first through any means necessary. His plan to corner Midori in the banquet could've cost him his life if it weren't for Q-taro's final stunt, yet he still reassured Sara to save Gin even tho it could've resulted in his execution from Meister potentially finding him guilty of violating the rules.

Him hugging Mai and trying to be more cheerful was cute as heck. I'm sorry but him showing more vulnerability around his allies and being less closed off in a way he hasn't been before is something I'm very head empty about. That he was hugging and interacting with Mai without making any unwanted advances or ladykiller jokes and generally just having a more friendly vibe was nice. It makes his creeping on Sara more unfortunate, but I'll take what I can for now. The bar is in hell.

And that's it, I think. Overall, I hope they do address some of his actions here in the final part or make them have an impact on his and Sara's relationship. Especially that Asunaro part. The person who wished for Sara to join the death game is still unknown and so is Keiji's consent form wish (same goes for the Dummies, Hinako and Megumi), so I'm curious if they're related or not. If he's going to go down an even darker path or redeem himself as much as he can we'll see when the final part drops. He has the potential to go both ways. This is going to be kinda awkward if the next part reveals him to have been a decent guy all along, so hopefully that doesn't happen. Please be morally bankrupt, man. This post didn't end up the way I wanted it to, nor bring up as many points as I would've liked, but I know I won't finish it if I went full perfectionist on it (I already spent months on this writer's block do be a bitch) and it's looking kinda long already. Hopefully it's still decent enough as is right now. I'd like to say that this is my apology for the last longpost I made, but I brought up one of the most controversial and hated ships and traits of Keiji's character and defended them, so maybe I shouldn't 🙃 Anywho, hope you enjoyed and cheerio.

#yttd #your turn to die #keiji shinogi #keisara #character discussion #apologies to all the keiji fans i promise i'm one of you. sorta #he's one of my faves in the game and ranks pretty high but not for the reasons he should i think #keiji's one of those characters i feel negatively about yet want to learn and do more with so that's the energy i probably give off here #also i noticed that most of these points involve sara which makes sense but is also very sad when you think about it #there's a lot of other things i'd want to expand on (mainly that last point) but i suppose i can wait another day #this is going to be my last longpost in a while because i'm going to be busier from today for better or for worse. probably for better lmao #last reminder to be nice. this isn't twitter but i know better #i'll beta read it again later for any mistakes i missed so apologies for any potential typos or errors #also it might actually rain today so heck yeah #i'm a soushin shipper so happy keisara week to anyone that participates btw ^_^#momento rambles

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didyoulookforme · 24 days

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Hiiiiiii B my dear

Ik you’ve considered writing ffm threesome and I had a crazy random thought but

Stylist AU! girlie, Matty, and also his makeup artist girl all having a night together…

-Belle <3 mwah mwah mwah

warning: smut thoughts. half-baked rambles.

this would happen the day of a large promotional photoshoot. one of those special occasions where you get to style the whole band and, because of all the work, management decides to hire extra staff, including the makeup artist.

from the start, it’s so damn obvious that her and matty have met prior. arms often around each other, even if for just a split second. her laughing at every one of his sometimes-very-bad jokes. him looking up at her as she dabs black glittery, eyeshadow on his lid. they must’ve fucked before because you know that shit eating grin all too well.

you keep occupied by making sure all four of them are handsomely dressed and proper. not really wanting to dwell on the fact that you felt embarrassedly jealous due to a man who you do fancy, but spends too many nights between other women’s legs.

and your jealously is reason enough to join them at matty’s request, him caught off guard at your non-hesitant answer when he cheekily suggests let’s go have some fun tonight. you know the insinuation of his words given that you also know he sleeps with more than one girl at times. but even if you are doing it because of your envy, it doesn’t stop you from wondering how he’d react if you were one of those girls.

well, turns out he enjoys the hell out of it. you swear you’ve never seen him that desperate, so much that clothes were off within five minutes of stepping into his hotel room. not even making it to the bed before hands and mouths are all over each other. his cock is red and angry, precum leaking against the trail of hair on his belly, making your mouth water and almost not wanting to share him with anyone. it was too late for that, though.

you’d be lying if you didn’t admit the situation was overwhelming. but it’s all made better when he holds you, back against his chest so he can keep you close and try melt the nerves away. promise i’ll take care of you, baby. that’s pretty much all it takes for you to let go, feeling as his hands travel up and down your body to wash away any remaining doubt of your actions.

time stops when she asks if she can eat you out, both of them noticing as you clench your legs together to remain standing, automatically turning to look at him as if to ask for permission. his pupils blown with lust and he can’t help but kiss you, whispering an only if you want to on the corner of your mouth. you can only nod and feel his smile grow against the back of your neck. that’s my good girl.

it doesn’t take long for matty to find a seat at the edge of the bed, bringing you over so you’re riding him while you are facing away, his arms guiding your hips back and forth on him. the angle makes you see stars, feeling every single inch of him inside you as his tip continuously hits that spot that makes you moan uncontrollably. then you all but scream when her mouth finally finds your clit. matty wraps his arms around your waist to keep you from falling forward as your body trembles from head to toe. it’s all too much and not enough at the same time, wanting this to last all night long but knowing well enough that you’d be lucky if you didn’t orgasm within the next couple of minutes.

her tongue circles and flicks against you, while his hips keep a steady pace, thrusting into you with incredibly ease as the mixture of your cum and her spit makes everything wet and messy. and it’s when you see his fingers tangle in her hair, keeping her head steady so you can get her yourself off, that your release instantly takes over you, feeling it in every single cell of your body. so much more intense that you’ve ever felt before that the clenching around his cock makes him cum too, spilling every bit of himself inside you as he mindlessly stutters praises to secretly thank you for being his, my sweet girl always making your heart swell and break at the same time.

and you thought it couldn’t possibly get better than that, but oh, you are so wrong. that image of him lying down, tan skin a stark contrast against the white linen… her turn to fuck herself on him at the same time he asks you to ride his face… it is nothing short of heavenly. seeing his fucked out expression under you, eyes never veering away from yours. his chin glistening with your sweetness, his moans vibrating around your overstimulated clit trying his best to hold on so he can make you cum at the same time again…

it is fucking perfect <3

#not sure if this makes sense but i fear i might pass out if i were to write a whole thing about them lol #i apologize in advance for any typos and errors #give me a moment #stylist au #gmam #gmam asks #ilysm belle

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thistledropkick · 1 year

Text

Last year, Kasai Jun was interviewed as part of the interview project DEATH, which interviews various people about death in order to find a better understanding of how to live and appreciate life.

I thought it was a fascinating interview, so I decided to translate it.

Please go visit the original interview - the photography accompanying it is absolutely gorgeous.

Also, please don't repost this whole translation elsewhere. If you want to quote an excerpt of my translation for something, please make sure to also credit the original team behind this interview and link back to the original interview.

Deathmatch Fighter Kasai Jun - 4/27/2022

“It’s not a deathmatch until you return home alive” The reason this 47 year old Charisma Wrestler continues to shed blood in the ring

Within pro wrestling, there is a genre called “deathmatch.”

An extreme set of rules that allows deadly weapons and has no disqualifications. Brawls with fluorescent light tubes, and dives onto barbed wire boards. Without hesitation, wrestlers stab their opponents in the head with fistfuls of bamboo skewers. When wound-covered bodies violently collide, shards of glass and sprays of blood shower the ringside seats.

Upon first seeing it, surely everyone thinks “Why are these people hurting each other like this?” “What the hell am I looking at?”

This is the world of the man known as “Charisma,” professional Wrestler Kasai Jun of the independent promotion Pro Wrestling Freedoms.

In November of 2009, he had a “razorblade board plus alpha deathmatch” against Ito Ryuji in Tokyo’s Korakuen Hall. Kasai, 35 years old at the time, dove from the second floor balcony, a fall of 6 meters, onto a table, aiming for his opponent Ito.

Afterwards they continued to fight with various weapons, in a match that concluded 15 seconds before the 30 minute time limit. That year, this match was awarded the Best Bout award. And Kasai, the winner of that match, became a living legend overnight.

12 years have passed since then. Kasai is now 47 years old, and he continues to rule over the world of deathmatch wrestling. Under the weight of many literal life-or-death battles, Kasai’s body no longer moves the way it did when he was young. Even so, why does he continue to set foot in such a dangerous place?

We asked “Charisma of Deathmatch” - a man who makes the crowd go mad in the space between life and death - about his views on death and on life.

Desiring to truly feel alive

- Normally, people try to avoid pain and suffering. Kasai, why do you continue to shed blood in the ring?

Hahaha. From an outside perspective, you must really wonder “Why do you keep doing something so painful” huh? That’s a normal way to feel. But from the wrestler’s perspective, it’s completely different.

In your normal daily life, do you ever feel like “Ahh, it’s so glorious to be alive”? You’d almost never unconsciously blurt out something like that.

But in a life or death battle in a deathmatch ring, after you step down from that ring, that’s exactly what you feel. “Ahh, I’m alive. I’m so grateful to be alive.” Because of that, I can’t quit.

Mountain climbers and stuntmen probably feel like this too, don’t they. Stepping into a situation where their life could end, and returning home safely. I wonder if they’re searching for that feeling of being “truly alive.”

This feeling is passed on to the audience too. Fans often tell me “Watching Kasai Jun’s deathmatch gives me the strength to continue forward.”

They say things like, “I’m being bullied at school so I wasn’t going to go any more, but now I feel like I can keep going.” Or, “It’s exhausting to keep going to work, but after seeing Kasai persevere while shedding blood in the ring, I can persevere and keep going to work.”

Recently I can’t do this much because of covid, but in the past when I’d sell merch, fans would often say things like this to me.

Because of this, it seems to me that deathmatch wrestling is simultaneously a way for wrestlers to feel truly alive, and a way for those who watch it to feel more positively about living.

- Because of the sensational way “death” is shown in the ring?

Probably, yeah. Because it looks like we’re doing something really painful.

But don’t get me wrong. We aren’t in a particular hurry to die. And we aren’t wasting our lives either. What I always say is, “It’s not a deathmatch until you return alive.”

[Note from me - this phrase (生きて帰るまでがデスマッチ) is a play on a well-known Japanese phrase 家に帰るまでが遠足 “The field trip isn’t over until we return home.” This started as something a teacher would say to students in their care, and Kasai has altered it into his motto towards both himself and other deathmatch wrestlers.]

- It’s not a deathmatch until you return alive.

If you get in a ring where you might die or get seriously injured, and you do die, or you do get seriously injured, you’re no different than a rank amateur, right? But a guy who dives into a deadly dangerous situation and returns from that ring unharmed, he’s the absolute greatest and the absolute coolest.

Like a stuntman, right? If he returns home alive, people say “amazing,” but if he dies, he’s no longer a pro.

At 35 years old, his view on life did a complete 180 during a match

But, when I was young, I thought about it completely differently. I never thought “I’m grateful to be alive.” In the ring, I did dangerous stuff and defeated my opponents. I just thought of it as my job.

The more dangerous stuff I did, the more people said “Kasai is amazing!” That felt really great. Every time I stepped into the right I thought, if something goes wrong and I die I guess that’s how it goes. I thought “Deathmatches should be a memento mori.”

- What caused such a big change in your values?

That match against Ito Ryuji in Korakuen, in 2009. It changed my mental state by 180 degrees.

The truth is, I went into that match thinking “This is my last match before I retire.” Because it was my last match, I would do everything I wanted to do. Win or lose, I went into the ring thinking “I’ll retire.”

But during the match, my feelings completely changed. I thought “If I quit like this, I’ll be half-dead.” There’s nothing else I want to do, and I’ve never felt joy like this anywhere else. It was just too much fun.

So, after the match ended with 15 seconds remaining, I announced my decision to continue wrestling. “I was thinking of retiring but, I’m gonna keep going.” That’s what changed.

- Since your values have changed so significantly from when you thought it’d be good to die in the ring, what’s your “ideal death” now?

Spending the day with my family as I always do, watching tv with an after-dinner drink as I always do, getting comfy in my futon as I always do, and passing away. That’s the best death, isn’t it.

I’ve said it before but, people who say “It’s my ambition to die in the ring” are just trying to look cool. For a pro, it all comes down to returning home alive. And so, I believe that when the life of Kasai Jun the human being comes to an end, Kasai Jun the wrestler will die as well. I want to be a pro wrestler until I die. That’s how I feel now.

When I was young, I thought the best time for a wrestler to retire was when he could still move, when people would say “It’s a shame, because there’s still more he can do.” But if that’s true, I’ve already missed my best time to retire.

Since I’ve come this far, maybe it’s better to keep doing this until my death. Since around the time I turned 40, I started thinking this way.

Gaining years = leveling up. I’ll reach my peak just before death.

- Since you’ve been doing this for so long, it’s inevitable that your body has become weaker. Kasai, how have you dealt with aging?

The word “elderly” is a concept created by human beings, isn’t it? Since that’s the case, I believe it’s something we can absolutely overcome. I don’t think increasing in age is the same as becoming elderly.

Look, it’s true that my physical stamina has decreased and my muscles have gotten weaker than they were when I was younger. But my will and my spirit have continued to grow. Instead of just breaking even, I think I’ve leveled up. 47 years old is level 47. I now see growing older as a positive, like leveling up every year.

Because of that, my peak has yet to come. I’ll reach my peak just before I die. I’ll be at my strongest just before my death. That’s the ideal I envision for myself.

There was a time when I felt insecure about my age. When I hit my mid 30s, I hated that my body was becoming weaker.

But then, while drinking at home and watching a documentary on TV about (rock musician) Yazawa Eikichi, I realized something. “If you think about it, uncool young people are uncool, and cool guys are cool even if they’re old.” Since then, my way of thinking changed. I started calling getting older “leveling up” at around that time.

[Note from me: Suzuki Minoru also refers to getting one year older as “leveling up” in the exact same way. They are friends, so I assume Suzuki got it from Kasai.]

- I'm surprised that a pro athlete who uses his body as a weapon would think of aging in that way.

Pro wrestling and deathmatch are unique among sports. Unlike say, track and field, or swimming, it isn’t a competition where every second counts. I can’t move the way I could when I was young any more, but through my facial expressions, pauses during matches, and so on, I have many ways to express myself.

A guy can be handsome, macho, with great muscles, and completely suck as a wrestler. In contrast, a guy like me who’s ugly, short, and middle-aged, can get support from the fans. It’s a completely different genre, and that’s what makes pro wrestling so interesting.

- What about your emotional struggles? In your documentary film you said you were having some difficulty maintaining your motivation, which you described as “Deathmatch Erectile Dysfunction”

Yeah, well, that can definitely be a problem. When you’re young, you’ve just got piles of hopes and dreams and things you want to do. But as the years go on, and as you accomplish those things, you can kind of get lost.

What’s helped me increase my motivation has been the existence of people who make me think “I absolutely don’t wanna lose to this guy” or “I don’t want this guy to take all the best stuff for himself” In my case, for example, that’s been (fellow PW Freedoms deathmatch wrestler) Takeda Masashi. Or, although he’s from another organization, New Japan Pro Wrestling’s El Desperado.

That’s why for the past 3 or 4 years, I’ve been asking people to “stimulate me.” I want intimidating people to keep approaching me. Well, on the other hand, if they take the most delicious part for themselves, that’s a problem.

A fear of death led to a “selfish life”

- Incidentally, perhaps it’s too late at this point, but do you worry about being injured or dying?

I said it already but, “It’s not a deathmatch until you return alive.” Since I’m a pro, I have the skills required to do this without death or injury.

But, it’d be a lie to say “I’m not afraid.” Even now, for several days before a match I get so stressed that I can’t sleep. Despite how I look, I get plenty scared. Much of my life has been driven by a strong fear of death.

- How do you mean?

It sounds silly, but when I was in grade school I believed in “The Prophecies of Nostradamus.” Have you ever heard of it? “In the year 1999, all of humanity will be destroyed.” Every night I shook with fear in my futon, thinking that my life would end at the age of 24.

Propelled by that fear, I concluded, “If the earth is gonna get destroyed anyway, I should quit studying. Instead I should use the rest of my remaining lifetime to do stuff that I like.” I completely quit studying, and instead spent all my time watching pro wrestling, which I loved.

Conversely, my fear of death also led me to become a pro wrestler. After graduating high school, I got a job in Tokyo as a security guard, but I gave into temptation and visited brothels daily. One day I happened to be reading a magazine with an HIV checklist inside, and almost every item applied to me.

At that time, I still thought “AIDS = death” so I thought “Oh, this is AIDS.” “Oh, this is how I’ll die.”

Luckily, when I got tested the result was negative, but after preparing myself for death, I thought “I really should do what I want” and knocked on the door of Big Japan Pro Wrestling. My life has always been influenced in this way.

- I get the impression that many wrestlers die at an early age. Since then, your fear must have increased.

Nah, that’s not really true. I’m surprisingly practical about the deaths of others. I just accept it, like “That’s the kind of life you lived.” I suspect my fear of death isn’t a fear of death itself, but a fear of becoming nothing.

- A fear of becoming nothing.

I’m no (actor and spiritualist) Tanba Tetsuro, but if after you die, you go to the spirit world, and cross the Sanzu river, that’s not all that scary is it? I wouldn’t go so far as to say “it’s fine if I die” but there’s some kind of hope or meaning. But if “After death, you become complete nothingness” “After death you feel no joy or sadness” I think that’s really scary.

But these days, I don’t experience that fear of death as much as I used to. If after this interview a dump truck hits me and I die, I wouldn’t have any regrets. I could say I did what I wanted to do.

Pro wrestling is a business where you depend on your popularity with an audience, but I’ve never tried to flatter the audience to get sales or support, or thought about how to increase my popularity. Ultimately, Kasai Jun puts himself first. I’m my own number one.

To die without regrets is to win at life

- But, if someone wanted to imitate your way of life, I think most people would be profoundly afraid of not getting by financially, or of being rejected by society. Why do you think you remain stoic in the face of such fears?

What’s there worth imitating about me? If you’re selfish like me and you can change it, you should want to!

But, this is probably related to that “fear of becoming nothing” I mentioned earlier. Ever since I was little, I’ve thought stuff like “This whole world isn’t real” and “Maybe all of this is just a dream.”

Nothing in this world is certain. Since that’s the case, all you have are your own body and your own feelings. In short, I don’t believe in anything but myself, so I put myself first.

- So in order to “feel truly alive” you throw yourself into the painful world of deathmatch wrestling, which leads us back to where we started.

That’s right. I guess you could say that pain is the only thing I believe.

But when I was young, I did understand the fear of not making enough money to survive. When I was around 30 and my son had just been born, I was seized by that fear.

Really, I was broke, and I couldn’t even pay into the National Pension Fund like I was supposed to, so I went to the ward office and said “I do intend to pay, so please wait a little.” I thought to myself, “Living is so expensive and so difficult.”

- A deathmatch fighter scary enough to quiet a crying child, with such an everyday problem.

Three years after my debut, when I was around 27, I was badly injured. I quit Big Japan, and after a year’s absence, I transferred to a different group called Zero-One.

Zero-One was founded by ex-New Japan Pro Wrestler Hashimoto Shinya, and the pay was good compared to Big Japan, and they held a lot of shows, so I could wrestle frequently. The environment there was very pleasant.

But, due to the policy of the organization, I couldn’t do the deathmatches that I love. During that time as a “salaryman wrestler,” I survived, but I think deathmatch fighter Kasai Jun, pro wrestler Kasai Jun, was completely dead.

“I really should do the pro wrestling I want to do,” I thought, and I quit Zero-One, and persisted with the pro wrestling that I love. Maybe that’s why I feel like I can now “die without regrets.”

Ultimately, if you live your own life as you wish, and think “I have no regrets” when you die, you win. Maybe people today have lost sight of the essence of what it means to live. It’s fine to work hard at your job, but if you’re spending every day miserably, is that kind of life really okay with you?

I’d rather live for 20 years and laugh every day than live for 100 years and never smile. If you’ve lived for 100 years and never laughed, that’s the same as being dead, isn’t it?

写真：本永創太 ~ Photographer: Motonaga Souta

執筆：鈴木陸夫 ~ Author: Suzuki Atsuo

編集：日向コイケ（Huuuu）~ Editor: Hinata Koike (Huuuu)

#kasai jun #jun kasai #pw freedoms #pro wrestling #deathmatch #my translation #This is definitely the longest thing I have ever attempted to translate!#I've got nobody checking over my work or anything like that so as always apologies for any typos or errors that I didn't catch

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