#it was just autism to autism communication and autism to autism attraction the whole time

[sicktrix]

hey gang

[soullessjack]

🔥 jack

oh my godddd I have so many unpopular opinions where do I even start….HOLY DISCLAIMER BATMAN!

anyways so in no particular order or tier system:

✯ i don’t think jack would wear anything feminine im sorry spn fandom. for lolz he has same-outfit-pattern-everyday autism and for serious it’s like. Really weird how fandoms tend to HC/portray non-binary amabs (and men/transmascs in general) almost exclusively as GNC or fem-presenting…like DGMW that is a real and valid form of self expression but it’s not the Only type of non-binary expression that exists. and honestly…**dare I say that most fandom/queer spaces just need to realize that queer masculinity exists and it doesn’t always have to be a matter of breaking gender norms??

** genuinely do whatever u want idc I can’t stop you i don’t want to stop you yada yada. paint his nails and put him in a skirt all u want but Please recognize patterns yall ����

✯ more headcanon complaints (see disclaimer above ⇧) but I promise to switch it up soon. anyways every time somebody on this lil website says something along the lines of “Jack can’t handle/doesn’t like [insert violence, scary or adult-oriented thing], he prefers [soft or blatantly childlike things]” I shrivel inward like a dead spider. It’s annoying, it’s completely inaccurate to his canon personality and interests, it’s annoying ˣ2, and whether ppl wanna admit it or not—it stems from infantilization. not necessarily ableism, as infantilization is not exclusive to disabled people, but still just about the same thing.

honestly all I see of majority jack headcanons are ones that set him back to just being a child or otherwise being treated like one. for example, the one about him being able to shapeshift is pretty cool...until it just becomes about him deciding to age regress, yknow, to an age set he canonically chose not to go through, showed no desire to be in, and is more offended than anything to be considered as such. all of his interests have to be some shit like bluey or animal crossing, and he drinks apple juice from a sippy cup instead of beer. BARF.

I’ve lessened on my keyboard warring over babyjack in the past year but I have not lessened in being a hater. and I’ve said this before, but the baby-jack au already breached headcanon containment a long time ago when it’s not only so widespread that ppl take it for canon and it makes having any intelligent conversation about him nearly fucking Impossible, but it also lead to harassment and accusations of being a fucking predator, to anyone who dared find a whole grown man attractive. any potential jack ship, like jackharper? automatic grooming case to them. it’s like the fandom is just so dead set on this idea that jack really truly is a child in every aspect you can think of, and for what? if it’s just a headcanon, something you know is not part of the actual show, then don’t go Travis the Chimp levels of apeshit when you see him being treated like he is canonically 💀

unpopular opinion numero 3 which is slightly connected to 2:

✯ baby-jack and a handful of the domestic au’s are BORING (see disclaimer again ⇧), not just on a surface level to my suiting, but also because I feel like it just ..misses the point of the show?

the ragtag untraditional found family is now as nuclear and traditional as the Atomic Age. Dean and Cas are the most heteronormative “who wears the pants in the relationship” gay couple ever, Sam is demoted to the uncle that gets written out of his own family, Jack is just there to make his gay dads look cute and emphasize that they’re a gay family (while still being very heteronormative), and at least 5 of them could be found in a California gated community. everything that made any of them unique or defined their personalities is just scrubbed off, even for an AU.

so much of the later seasons focus on Sam and Dean realizing that they don’t have to make a hard splitting decision between the lives they want to live; that they can find a balance; be happy and have good things—namely families—without giving up hunting (and vice versa, that they can have hunting without giving up on family or happiness). everybody loves the gay hunters from S10(?12?) and what they represented for Dean, but I almost never see that be put into practice in the fandom.

THEY’RE ALREADY DOMESTIC!!! AND WITH THAT PERFECT BALANCE!!!! Season 13 quite literally gave Team Free Will a surrogate son to raise and established them as a family; highly untraditional, largely dysfunctional, overall not fitting of a family family, and yet they are a family still. Dean wears an apron and cooks and bakes for everyone; he built himself a man cave and established two separate family night events that they all ritually keep up; Sam has a morning jogging routine and visits his girlfriend every so often; Jack was taught how to drive, has normal chores like washing dishes, and gets groceries. And they didn’t just have that while fighting monsters—they had that while fighting a whole fucking archangel. Even if it did go down the gutter by the end, they still had it: domestic familial bliss and violent messy hunting without having to trade one for the other.

✯ I truly genuinely think Jack’s relationship with Dean is the best, most interesting and most misunderstood out of the three, and I also think that the problems with his relationship to Cas and Sam are hugely overlooked by the fandom—granted they are very small, especially if you’re comparing it to Dean, but they’re still there and I think we should bully Cas and Sam about it more. I shan’t elaborate because it’s 5AM and this was an impulsive add-on ❤️

✯ getting normal now…his plaid pattern jacket from the first half of Ouroboros is ugly as SHIT i have never liked it and don’t think I ever will. but I cannot deny it; he got that shit on.

✯ most unpopular opinion of all, I wanna do insane shit to his cervix 🙌

[punkeropercyjackson]

Todomomo is literally the closest you can get to a autistic4autistic t4t ship without it being canon or intentional.Shouto's dad is an abusive hypermasculine prick who's implied to be misogynistic(teaching Touya his views on women as a kid,that they're 'useless' based off their genders)and Shouto wants to grow up to be the man he never could and refused to be and dosen't care about gender at all,much less conforming to it's roles and gets called a pretty boy a lot and is way closer to his mom and sister than he is to either of his brothers,Momo is the daughter of a rich couple who adultified her to the max in order to make her the ultimate 'proper prim lady' with little regard to her emotions and mental well-being and only care about her when she lives up to their impossible expectations and she had to get that 'I have to be perfect or else i'm WORTHLESS and NOT GOOD ENOUGH FOR ANYTHING' mentality from somewhere and it's not like she wasn't isolated from her peers by not being allowed to be a normal kid in any way(her mom didn't even let her go festivals and she had to sneak off on her first one with a fear of her finding out in the back of her head the whole time!That is NOT normal behavior for your child to exhibit,Doña Yaoyorozu!!!)and she presents femininily in a way that's viewed as artificial by assholes but it's just genuinely who she's made herself to be!Shouto explicitly inhereted his mother's build and hates that he keeps looking like his dad as he gets older and Momo's said to look older than her girl classmates even disregard her body type and towers over most teen guys!!!

Shouto has a neutral expression that looks purely deadpan and just a bit angry/annoyed and he's awful at socializing and he's insanely good at flirting with Momo but IT'S NEVER ON PURPOSE and Momo has a resting smiling face as her default look and she gets scandalized at regular teen behavior and she's an expert at navigating social situations with practiced politeness and they both take things literally and don't understand the dumb kind of norms and have a special fondness for a particular food because it gives them comfort(cold soba + tea types)BUT ALSO!!!!They have matching additional food motifs(bubble tea specifically + strawberry based things)and cordinated outfits with their own aesthetics(their sweaters,,,,,,that got turned into a running thing in the games and i believe official art too)and are canon cat people(*insert that 'All cats have autism' pic here*)and Momo is a bookworm while Shouto is a comics nerd and Momo got into alt music thanks to Jirou and has a love for desserts and Shouto writes platonic love letters to Rei and perfers the spicier/savoury kinds of japanese food AND THEN THEIR ACTUAL RELATHIONSHIP

Shouto voted for Momo because he thinks she's the best they're is but didn't verbally communicate it to her because it never occured to him he'd need to and Momo admires Shouto just as much and said it outloud to his face from the start and Aizawa being the only that helps them clear up the mix up?????His old autistic man ass that's married to audhd icon Mic?So Shouto goes into detail to Momo's face too about how cool he thinks she is and that's when they officially becomes friends and he never shuts up about her to anyone from then on,this nigga's new special interest is his best girl friend he's got a crush on,and he did notice she was sad when no one else did in an earlier part but had no clue what to do or say to cheer her up so they spend time together now that they're really buds and they both know just what to say to eachother by the War Arc and Momo finds Shouto being a fucking doofus with geeky ass tendencies and moments she could make a youtube compilation out of it if she was lil meaner to be so attractive she says he's perfect for Prince Charming as a role in a play Class 1-A did in one of the novel's.Izuku broke Shouto out of his ice,Jirou and Mina broke Momo out of her doll shell and now neither of them need to mask but what brought them together was being next to eachother at their worsts and at their bests and only thinking the latter no matter what or who said otherwise.Including themselves

[punkiio]

More infodumps? This time... why does Alan and Deacon work? In the previous ask you said that Dee helps keep the mood light, what with Alan being more on the stoic side. What else?

MAN.... I have so much to say about them I think abt them so much.. Don't even joke lad

So obviously Alan and Deacon met when Alan first found the Railroad. Alan was confused as to how Deacon knew so much about him, but kinda assumed he had met him before and just didn't remember. After the mission to retrieve the lost prototype from their old HQ, Alan was officially part of the Railroad. Deacon was the one who gave Alan the codename "Charmer" sort of as a joke. Since Alan is really quiet and monotone, Deacon kinda made the joke of "Well, aren't you a charmer?" to poke fun at it, since Alan isn't actually. But after all that, Deacon agreed to travel with Alan to help him find Shaun, since it not only involved a Railroad agent but also the whole Institute. Deacon already had the hunch that Alan and that vault had something to do with the gen3 synths, since gen3 synths only started appearing after Vault 111 had opened decades ago (you can find this out by looking through some terminals)

Now for why they work out together so well to me... I mentioned that Alan likes traveling with people who can lighten the mood, but he likes the sort of more introverted personality Deacon has. Alan is very quiet due to a mix of trauma and autism, and I think Deacon would be able to understand that easily. He would be able to understand that just because he's quiet and doesn't smile or show emotion a lot, doesn't mean he's upset or emotionless or anything. Alan doesn't need to put on a mask or anything that he would need to do if it were someone less understanding. They both aren't social people and both don't like being with big groups of people. Like, a big part of at least Alan's attraction to Deacon is the comfort level. What I mean by this is that Alan is selectively / partially mute and sometimes uses sign language when he goes mute. I have a headcanon that Deacon knows a few languages since he talks about reading lots of pre-war books, and one of those languages being ASL. So Deacon is kinda one of the only people out there that can communicate with Alan through ASL. Even if Deacon responds back with his voice while Alan signs, he is still just as happy to be able to communicate with SOMEONE, and having someone around who can translate for him if needed. Deacon is that lighthearted vibe that Alan needs in his life that helps him cope with the wasteland, and Alan has that calm personality that Deacon needs in his life. They kinda just balance each other out.

Alan and Deacon's main "love language" is quality time, and like to just be alone together, but not necessarily doing something together. Sometimes they'll just sit in silence while reading or something. They don't show PDA, and usually only show affection when they two of them are alone, which Alan is usually the one to initiate.

And about Deacon's lying habit.. Alan kinda doesn't care. He believes everything Deacon says because he trusts him, and it kinda frustrated Deacon at first because he's literally trying to teach Alan to not trust people easily. But the thing is, its not that Alan trusts people too easily, its because its Deacon. He trusts those he is close with, not just anyone. Also, Alan sometimes plays along with Deacons lies, even if those lies are him taking all the credit (like after that first mission when Des asks what happened).

They began to get close from traveling together so often, and Alan opened up to Deacon after about a year or two of knowing each other. Alan opened up about his family situation and how it affected him, about his time in the army, and about his dead husband. Deacon was of course understanding, but still wasn't ready to open up about his past. Alan opening up about everything brought them closer. Deacon became the one person Alan was most comfortable around. If they were in a big group, Alan usually liked sitting in the corner of the room with Deacon, who also isn't the most social. He brought Deacon with him everywhere, and could feel like he could tell Deacon anything.

Deacon opened up about his past a while after Alan opened up about his. it was extremely hard for Deacon to do, especially since he had never told anyone before and he didn't know how Alan was going to react about being in the UP Deathclaws in the past. Alan was, of course, very understanding. Alan could see how hard Deacon was trying to get away from his past, and had an even higher respect for him than he had before. Alan reassured Deacon that he was a good person, that he wasn't "everything wrong with the whole Commonwealth". Their bond was now solidified. They could both relate to each other and comfort each other through hard times. Deacon made a promise to be more honest in the future, but Alan didn't find anything wrong with the way he was before. This is around the time Deacon started to call Alan by his real name instead of "Charmer" when in private. Alan began to help Deacon cope with his past, and helped him have a better view of himself. I have a headcanon that Deacon suffers from BPD, and Alan tries to help him cope with it and helps him try to communicate those feelings.

Deacon tried getting rid of his feelings for Alan due to his fear of attachment, but his feelings became so much harder to cope with after Alan risked his life saving him. They were fighting a few raiders and Alan blocked Deacon from getting shot, causing Alan to be shot a few times in the torso and shoulder. They fled from the raiders and took shelter in an abandoned house. Deacon patched him up and took him to Doctor Carrington. 

Deacon was the one who confessed his feelings. Alan and Deacon had set up camp and were eating by a fire when Deacon told Alan he had to talk to him. Deacon explained that he wanted to be more honest, and more honest about his feelings. He confessed that he had romantic feelings for Alan, which Alan confessed that he returned the feelings. He asked Deacon if he wanted to be a thing, and Deacon said yes, just to take things a little slow. Sometime after, Alan asked Deacon if he was okay with potentially being a stepfather. Alan wasn't sure how he'd feel about it, but Deacon reassured him and told him he had always wanted to be a father.

Ummmm I think that is most of what I feel like I have to say about them.. Sorry its really long I have. So many thoughts about them and I think about them so much. It makes a lot more sense if you take Deacon's character a bit more seriously and look past just all the jokes the fandom makes about him.

Here's a few drawings I've done of them that I like... Last two are older but I still like them

[bobafett51]

TW: Assault and mental Health

Dealing with and identifying abusers as somebody with Autism is so difficult. And it's a lesson I keep getting reminded of constantly.

I'm so tired. I have been so tired, my whole life. I spent my whole life dissociating without even realizing until a couple months ago. Before I was diagnosed with Autism, nearly every time I had a meltdown or shutdown I would respond by dissociating. Every time something would trigger a past trauma that I was unable to identify I would just simply disassociate. And because I pushed myself so hard every day, and because there were so many things in the past that have traumatized me, I would disassociate almost every day. Disassociation became the norm for me. So much so that I have a hard time remembering that it is not normal.

Building on this, like everyone with Autism can attest to, life is very uncomfortable for me. The world was not build for us in mind, so nearly all the world makes us uncomfortable. What is really hard is identifying a normal level of uncomfortable I have to learn to cope with is (like there being multiple conversations in the same room) and a bad level of uncomfortable (like a "friend" constantly groping me unwantedly).

I had a "friend" who kept groping me, putting his hand under my shirt and feeling my muscles, grabbing my ass, moving his hands around my crotch area, and grabbing my arms. And every time he did it I would dissociate and I would get triggered as memories of past sexual traumas would flood into my brain. But because I'm so used to dissociation, being uncomfortable, and getting triggered I did not realize that this was a bad level of uncomfortable. It was not until this "friend" assaulted another one of my other friends that I realized my "friend's" behavior was so wrong. And I am just so frustrated that it still takes so much for me to realize when someone else's behavior is so out of line. I have a "friend" who constantly sexually assaulted me and the part I am most frustrated about is how long it took me to realize it. That is just so fucked up to me and it just makes me even more frustrated.

But it's partly because this kind of stuff happens to me all of the time. Almost twice a month, someone is groping me, definitionally assaulting me. It just makes me wonder if I'm the one doing something wrong? Is there something wrong with me? Like is there something about me that makes people want to do that to me? Do I accidentally communicate that I want people to touch me? I get that I'm muscular, that I'm attractive, but like does this happen to other men? Why can't I go out without someone grabbing my ass or my crotch or shoving my hand in a sexual area?

I will heal from this. This is far from the worst thing I have gone through. And honestly, I identified this abuse faster than my prior ones. It's just so frustrating seeing how much more growth I have to do. How much more I have to learn. I usually love the opportunity and knowledge that I have more room to grow and more stuff to learn. But when it comes to this, I just wish I didn't have any more growth to do. I wish I could just identify abusers quicker, I could have avoided so much pain and trauma if I could.

At times like this I have to keep in mind that I will be healed and forgiven. James 5:15. It will work out. My next post will be about a moment of sexual healing to counteract this one.

[our-neuroqueer-experience]

i feel that an interesting neuroqueer experience to talk about is whether you found out you were neurodivergent or questioning your gender identity first lol, just an interesting topic!

personally i questioned my gender first 😅 and it's been very very confusing until i started to find out more about autism. did a lotta research, did a lotta professional tests, did a lotta "Hey, that sounds like me!" "That's EXACTLY the thing I go through!" watching Those Signs of Being Autistic videos, general Lists of Signs, neurodivergent people Talking About Their Experiences etc. after all that which made most of my thoughts and feelings make sense, i eventually found out that, hey, being neurodivergent can affect your gender, sexuality, attraction, monogamy, etc etc, all of it! and then everything sort of... came together? it felt almost like i finally became the one whole person i'm meant to be after being completely confused about myself for many many years lol. it was eye-opening and i couldn't be happier that i understand myself now. i think there's still more to learn but that's what life is! and i'm excited for the rest of this journey :)

anyone on this journey, you got this!!! and anyone who's been on the journey, you're awesome and i hope you're happy & proud of YOU!!!

- 🐊

hi 🐊 anon! you're always so positive and supportive when u pop up in my inbox, your energy is contagious :p. yeah, personally i started questioning both at the same time, because i had had my doubts about both when i was really young (six or seven) but had just sort of ignored it right up until middle school, lol. i think it's probably a very common experience in a society that constantly gaslights both gender-diverse and neurodiverse people to be unsure of or questioning your experience for a long time without really doing anything about it for fear of being discriminated against. finding that community of neurodiverse queer people really was my lifeline back when i was first questioning myself and im sure it was for a lot of other neuroqueers too :p

[aroaceconfessions]

My aroaceness feels like a disability and I don't know how to have that conversation with people without them misunderstanding the nuance and just attributing it to internalised aphobia and I don't want to contribute harm to the community as a whole but I wish we could talk about how for some people this variation of sexuality feels like something is missing from the body.

For context I have been physically disabled my entire adult life, I've also known and accepted my sexuality all that time. And to me personally, and I can't stress that 'personally' enough, I can't help but relate how both things affect me. My physical disabilities cause my body to lack certain abilities. That's the whole point of them. And my aroaceness causes my body to lack the ability to feel attraction. Attraction is big part of human growth and developement and not developing that ability feels and acts personally like a disability to me.

Let me be clear I DO NOT see my aroaceness as a disorder, it is not a illness or condition, it cannot be cured or treated. And I never make the assumption any other aroace person would see them selves as disabled for it. Nor would I view them as such unless they disclosed that feeling. But I don't think their experience negates my own or vice versa. It's more nuanced than that.

Just as we should respect that there are autisic individuals who see their autism as a difference and others who see it a disability, and there are are d/Deaf individuals who see their d/Deafness as a difference and others who see it as a disability. Neither of their experiences falsifies the other, both are correct and neither is a better point of view. (And if you think one is you need to do some research and accept that other people know their own experiences, cultures and bodies better than you do.)

However I am aware and agknowledge that in the public sphere sharing this feeling could act as damaging to our community because it is afterall a sexuality not a disability, despite how it affects me, and I don't want to give allos the space to fuel any aphobic rhetoric because this is not their conversation to have.

What do you think, can there be more nuance in this like with other communities or is this all just internalised aphobia? Does anyone else feel this way?

I am sorry if this post has affected anyone in a negative way. Once again this is about my own personal experience of aroaceness and is not about or how I view anyone else.

Thank you for reading.

[nothorses]

Hi, I'm an MTF in their late 20s. I've had a fairly difficult time accessing and sustaining medical transition over the past decade since I've realised and I don't feel comfortable even using she/her for myself anymore.

I really appreciated the Baeddel posts you've made and I wasn't aware of them at the time. However I fell quite heavily into Tumblr SJW and then irl radical queer activism in my late teens to mid-20s. In those environments I ultimately developed a genuine paranoia about being found out as a 'bad person', losing all of my friends, being ostracised from my limited support network etc.

I ultimately experienced sexual assault by several cis women while I was presenting as a man. I found myself feeling completely isolated and bereft of comfort. I didn't feel able to reach out for help without having to prove my social justice bona fides (outing myself as trans) and reinterpreting it through the lens of it being transphobia (which it could not have been).

In the end I fell out of social justice spaces, towards dirtbag leftist type environments. However, ultimately I've found myself attracted to moderate anti-SJW, edgelordy sort of anti-idpol leftism. In the end I've disconnected from everything, because whatever merits I might perceive in any specific argument or cause, I'm more concerned about my pattern of being drawn to extremist ideologies and activism.

Basically I've reached a crisis point in my transition, finally being able to access HRT in non-DIY fashion. It's thrown me for a loop, as someone living in the male-mode* for so long. I feel the need to reach out for support but also fear of doing so.

The trans support groups and spaces I know don't want to relate to me as someone who has experienced trauma as a male. Who is living with the dual burden of the problems of being a trans woman with the social isolation and coping skills of a cis man. I am also autistic, and I've found there's a fairly narrow range of acceptable autism'ss in those spaces. Autism of the species that makes you meek or cute is more welcome. That which makes you pedantic or firm in our beliefs not so much. Which makes us think or behave differently or worst of all commit faux-pas or missteps whole socialising. There is seemingly little tolerance for that (in the end, tolerating a slightly difficult person, admittedly).

Anyway, I'm grateful for what you've written on the topic of men's problems and the tendency of feminist and 'queer'** activism to ignore that suffering. I appreciate it as a possible trans woman, intensely dysphoric person who also had to suffer the isolation, emotional brutality and self-denial that comes with growing up a boy in a tough environment.

*a withered, grey version of living as a cisgender man, covering my body, avoiding intimacy, avoiding making new social contacts out guilt for the deception, of sleepwalking through life.

**after my irl experience of radical queer activism, I run away from the term.

Hey, I really appreciate you reaching out. It sounds like you've been through a lot, and I'm so sorry you haven't been given the understanding, acceptance, and community you need and deserve.

I think everyone has stuff in them that draws them toward extremist ideology; that's why it is what it is, and why it works. It's not that there's something wrong with you as a person- it is, in all likelihood, just that you're isolated and in desperate need of community. That's the target demographic for extremist recruiting, because those are the qualities that make someone recruitable. The solution to that is to find healthy support and community somewhere else.

The fact that you're aware of this pattern & acting on it- and even more than that, have managed to get away from multiple extremist groups- that shows a lot of awareness and strength, and a lot of hope for you. You're gonna be okay.

There are people- lots of people- who have had similar experiences, and felt similar ways, and who need similar support and understanding. There are even more people who, despite not experiencing those things firsthand, are open-minded, understanding, and accepting; and who will listen to you & gladly welcome you into their lives and communities. I know it's scary to open yourself up and put effort into finding and connecting with them, but they are out there. You'll find them if you keep trying.

I really recommend checking out this article by someone who, it sounds like, was in a similar situation to the one you're in now.

You're always welcome here, and I hope you can find the support and community you deserve.

Good luck! 💙

[culminada]

I'm asexual! but I barely experience acephobia because my other three alienating traits are like shields that protect me from it 🙃unfortunately I do experience the -phobias people have of the other three things so. yaaay my ability to make friends? not to mention romance? ugh.

first up is that I'm multicultural and belong to a cultural minority. I'm not going to talk about it a whole lot because it's very confusing! so I just call it my culture of origin! and they're not online at all. like we/they (??) barely believe in the tech things. definitely they're not on tumblr. so I'm not looking for them here. just talking about how being multicultural has affected me socially. Mostly it obstructs my social life from my end, by getting in the way of me feeling like I have anything in common with people. I'll only really accept a romantic partner from my culture of origin, so that excludes 99.999% of people I'll meet on the street from discussion of my sexuality lol.

Second up! The autism! Nobody ever tried to make friends with me (or responded when I tried to) and I have no clue if its because of the 'tism or the red blotches on my face from the dermatillomania. I might lean more towards the autism but I'm still skeptical of that, also I'm 'culminada' (CULtural MINority, Autism, Dermatillomania and Asexuality) so, autism it is :) I had to practice for YEARS before I got the hang of interacting with people I didn't know well. Small talk? What's that? WHY? I hate it I hate it I hate it I hate it. Nobody sticks around anyway. (The one time somebody approached me independently while I was writing in my notebook and I stared at my notebook while trying to think what to say. so they walked off. utter joy.) The progression from 'stranger' to 'acquaintance' to 'friend' and so on is also something I've had to learn. I've had to claw my way up the 'relationship ladder' which, sadly, does exist whether one is on the friendship ladder or the romantic ladder. I have yet to progress anywhere on the romantic ladder with ANYONE so. yayyyyy

Dermatillomania, the incessant picking of my own skin! Like I said, red blotchy face isn't very attractive. Sometimes I'll be bleeding and not notice. yaaaaay. Finding a romantic partner is going to be. yknow. a breeze. a walk in the park. as easy as breathing. not to MENTION. the sheer TIME it takes out of my DAY. how am I supposed to learn the wifely skills of my culture when I?? lose HOURS to dermatillomania and executive dysfunction? (they have a feedback loop on each other. I get Stuck in my day for whatever executively dysfunctional reason! oh now I start picking, bc of course. OH DEARY NOW I CAN'T SWITCH TASKS, GUESS I'LL STAY HERE FOREVER. DESTROYING MY SKIN.)

So yeah, by the time somebody infiltrates the layers of visual disgust, autistic communication barriers, and cultural differences, they're pretty well screened against something as simple and boring as acephobia. You don't get close to me without being VERY accepting of differences. (or just. yknow. capable of critical thinking and the awareness that people are different lolz.)

(I also tended to be that twelve-year-old who sighed wistfully and said I can't wait to get married, I want to get married ASAP, you know historically people got married at like. 14 right? and so everybody around me was always going OH DEARY YOU SHOULD ABSOLUTELY WAIT... LIKE SIX MORE YEARS IF NOT LONGER which I'm sure my fellow asexuals would have loved to hear, but my alloromantic brain was Very Unhappy about. it has now been 6+ or more years, for the record,)

anyway that's me. I got tired of repressing my aceposting and autism-posting and so on, bc my other blog is a fandom fic blog. btw go check out @skaald-of-the-hearth-fires that's the fifth, unofficial reason I feel alienated. (actually that falls under the autism heading, nevermind) my culture barely does video games. nobody in regular old boring American culture plays my special interest video game either. I find this quite distressing when people ask what I do and I say oh!! I'm a writer! I write fanfic for Guild Wars 2!! oh you haven't heard of that. ok. I'm so normal about that. so I've written the fic to be quite understandable to non-gamers, fandom-blind readers, and brainrotted fans alike :)

[autistic-sidestep]

🧿 and 💋 for Sura, please!

🧿Do they have a superstition or belief? Such as "black cats bring bad luck", belief in ghosts, tarot, crystals, meditation, etc.

yep! there's a reason why eyes are a central motif to argos' design (and in general just being rife with symbolism. im linking the posts i wrote up a while back bc i don't really have the spoons to add anything new). they've picked up a lot of things from other people, baby sura was a bit like a sponge absorbing other peoples' belief systems from people they liked (so some of stuff of ortega's or elena's from the time spent with them).

like they used to wear a nazar bracelet/pendant (which ricardo kept) and prayed. both were things they picked up from the various people sura met during their first escape, since they'd observed cultural things were something you could find common interests and community. ("these people look like me, therefore, maybe i should do that to fit in?").

sura was still willing to learn even if it never fully understood the customs, but it was really the communal aspect to it that they found so appealing, the connection and unified purpose that they didn't really get to experience at the farm (seeing, but never being able to participate). similar reasons for the draw to vigilantism and becoming sidestep, i think. so sura picked up a bunch of different customs, (including avoiding pork, up until the nanosurge at which point they went basically pescetarian if not vegetarian, (raw) meat made sura nauseous after that).

i think post hb they're a bit less superstitious now. but there's still some traditions sura will still keep up, like prayer (and using an accompanying mat/cushion), or using tealights and incense. it doesn't really believes in higher beings anymore (or at least not in benevolent ones. what was that quote in nitw? "a universe that doesn't care, but people that do." feels kinda fitting. entropy and forces that aren't really personified, that just are for fate motive? although i might swap it to anger/justice and have it as a secondary motive.), but just for the routine and comfort of it (autism). also i think it factors well into sura's outsider scar and attempting to heal it.

not to mention sura's had some habits in the past like. letting the microwave timer go off is not only bad, the whole day's ruined now. when they used to hang out in the rangers hq breakroom sura would just. stop the timer a second before it was done. even if it wasn't their food. no beeping allowed. >:( (i'd hesitate to call this a compulsion but it certainly was one of sura's eccentricities.)

(does this make sense lol. i am so exhausted)

💋Do they kiss first? And do they bite their lips if they're mischievous or aroused? And do they bite their partner's lips when they try and pull away?

kissing first depends on the context, but Probably yes if they know the other party is interested. sura's not really one to presume on that front, since their orientation stuff makes figuring that out little wonky. i think sura's puppet/ace/juno is allo so that makes things extra confusing flipping from her body to itself and the fact it's less confident dealing with "romantic" stuff as itself. sura can fake it well enough as juno since she's meant to be attractive and deal with the stuff that comes with (dating, flirting, etc.)

sura? less so. even with argos, there's a degree of separation between that persona and its civilian self. but yes to lip biting, probably a big tell lol. biting partners lips…. i could see it, yeah, just to tease as long as they can tell there's nothing wrong? all comes down to how comfortable they are with the other party, ig

[nonconstories]

Fun Fact every werewolf has a slightly different relationship to their wolfside and it effects how they shift and how they behave in their pack + in werewolf society at large.

Let me come out and say, this part of the lore is influenced by World of Darkness (New World, Werewolf the Forsaken + VTR). Click under the cut for a whole bunch of Gay Autism.

First off, you have Jeremy. Jeremy is the newest werewolf in all of Moondrunk's cast: he's only been a werewolf for a few years. His relationship to his wolf is new too: he treats it like (and relates to it) as a parasite, or as an acute disability. He struggles against, resents it, feels a lot of shame towards it, and gets defensive when others question how he treats this part of himself. He sometimes says very harsh things about his own kind that are self-criticisms that come out twisted and hurt his community. Parallel this to how he relates to his bisexuality and to his attraction to Fletch, and contrast to....

Jasper, who lives in perfect harmony with his wolfside( though that harmony is largely physical). He relishes in the power and pleasure his wolf can bring him, and often finds it easy to shift when he's feeling excited or restless. Like Caelum, he thinks of his wolf form as his 'real form', and his human body a facade. He doesn't, however, give much thought to how his wolf influences his behavior and choices, unlike...

Caelum, who, unlike the majority of werewolves you'll meet (especially the born-and-bred aristocratic type) approaches his wolf intellectually. He spent years analyzing his behavior at different phases of the moon and in different stages of shifting; he's deeply familiar with the flesh-and-blood science behind their anatomy and brain structure, their hormonal production, their sociology. He barters with his wolf, makes it a thing of give and take. Balance, something he might have learned from...

Ronan is not unique to wolf-culture, but he is somewhat unique to Pack Noctifer. Because Ronan's relationship to his wolf is wholly spiritual in nature. He believes that his wolf is a fragment of a primal god, one of blood and the moon and the hunt and the wilds. He believes that his wolf powers are gifts, a sacred birthright, and it is grants him leave to treat humanity as cattle and prey. Magic is a constant in his life: crystals and astrology and tantric chanting and mushroom induced astral projection sessions. He speaks of his wolf as an Evangelical speaks of the Holy Spirit, and he passed some of these beliefs onto...

Kase, whose relationship to his wolf runs perpendicular to Jeremy's (intersecting briefly, instead of parallel). Kase treats his wolf the same way he treats his depression and his ptsd: excuse and security blanket; weapon and shield; companion and abuser. He uses the rage and the violence to try and cope with everything that's ripping him up inside, but can't deal with the fallout, so he blames the wolf like its a separate person, instead of a part of him. This also a theme we see with...

Avery! Avery's had a pretty shitty life too, okay? He just whine about it like some people he won't name (Kase). And unlike some people (Kase again) he didn't wait until he got the Bite to start hitting back. Avery has always chased power, has always tried to be an eager collaborator to brute power. He feels safest as a weapon in someone else's hands, and he's also done a shit ton of drugs to counteract the consequences of that lifestyle. Unlike Kase who chased dope like heroin and oxycotin and liquor, and Ronan who favors hallucinogens, Avery did steroids and PCP and flirted with meth for a while. He treats the wolf like he treats testosterone and guns and back-up: another way to hit back, and something that nearly consumes him at times, unlike...

Asher. Asher struggles to have a relationship to his wolf at all. And that's not even his fault. Asher was young when he was Bitten (only 17) and he can't manage a full shift even 4 years later. The rest of the Pack pretends they aren't worried, but they are. Sometimes, the wolf doesn't take right. The full shift, the full spectrum of powers, simply never comes. And here's the thing: Asher accepts that. He knows it intuitively, senses a certain weakness in his body. Not unlike someone quietly realizing that they are dyslexic, and will always struggle with things others find easy. So, while Asher isn't sure he'll ever be fully 'in-touch' with his wolf, he accepts that, and understands that he is no lesser for it. After all, what else is the position of Omega even for?

[punkeropercyjackson]

As said yes when i asked my new moot @tubvoids,here is why Percy is autistic and in fact,objectively the most autistic-coded character in the entire franchise!

'Troubled kid' literally just means 'autistic kid who faces peer abuse and even adult abuse for it'.It's Percy's entire character and lingers into his adulthood

Was a bully beater and stayed that way no matter how many times he got expelled

Ass at school but really smart in every other area

Has his intellegence insulted nonstop his whole life and just takes it despite what a strong backbone he has because he thinks he deserves it

Anger issues and general emotional regulation issues

Mama's boy who's mom dosen't quite always understand how he works or why he is the way he is but loves and is good to him anyway and considers his differences from normal people a gift instead of a flaw or something that needs to be 'cured'

Canon safe food(blue food)and Resting Bitch Face(the 'scary default expression' he inhereted from Poseidon)

Dosen't even try to understand social norms because he thinks they're stupid as fuck

Super kind and earnest in a way that gets on normies' nerves both in-universe and irl because they think he's 'corny' and 'unrealistic'

Has a beyond weird as all fuck sense of humor that's just natural instead of actively trying to be funny and always lands

Wears layers/heavy clothes all the time

Complex feelings on morality leaning towards chaotic good but he's done some fucked up shit that was technically justified in the contexts but beats himself up over anyone even though the others deserved it

Dated Rachel because she made him feel normal for once and he specified what made him love her was her brutal honesty and enthutiasm that gave way for healthy communication on both ends

Hates traditional masculinity and wants to be free of it and acts a lot like a trans femme egg,including finding hypermasculinity on men gross and unappealing and often wonders what makes people attracted to boys(Gender fuckery and also even just binary transfeminity are common combos with autism)

Very goofy,silly,chaotic and unrestrained with kiddy interests and a digust towards 'true maturity' but also loves punk shit

Can never tell when someone is attracted to him but when he loves them back he's Rizz City

Anarchist who hates the rich,privilege and power and does activism and direct action both in the mythos world and the mortal world(the former onscreen/the aformentioned bully beating and implied to participate with Rachel in her protests and charity events)

Gets along so well with younger people he basically adopts them as younger siblings and pseudo-kids(P*rcico shippers please stop being jesters,Nico and Percy are peak transmasc 4 transfem and autistic 4 autistic found family realness,they're the BLUEPRINT for it and y'all wildin' for thinking Hazel's not autistic too like hellooooooo she's literally a creepy cute middle school weirdgirl who was outcasted from other kids,even the fellow black ones?Ofc she's autistic)

Dare i say.The fandom's denial of his blatant autism is in of itself proof he HAS autism and is audhd.They're always calling him stupid and insisting it's meant affectionaly when he's stated a millions of times he does NOT like it,they turn his special interests that's so important to him for coping growing up and now too into him being a childish ass mf with no culture(that is also racist with how popular afrolatino Percy but they don't care just like they don't care about making him actually look black lmao),defang his anger issues and meaness and brutality and anti-authority mentality to turn him into nothing but an idiot and give all the credit to Annabeth(and that's misogynistic cause it makes her boring)and finally infantalizing him as if HE'S not fatherly one in the mcs.I don't even mean making him younger,i mean making him act like a little kid and his friends literally parenting him.It's all textbook rethoric and bullying tactics to irl autistic people and they only say he's allistic so they don't gotta feel bad instead of growing tf up and being nice to mentally disabled folks they can't relate to perfectly and to develop senses of humor outside of John Mulaney bits

Is literally the protagonist of a book series that's ultimate purpose is representation for neurodivergent kids as their role model that grows up with them and showed us we can live good lives like he is now????????The idea of allistic Percy is genuinely incomprehensible ong

'Good Kid' from the musical?Yeah,it's literally a song about an autistic kid who can't mask and gets abused by everybody for it no matter how hard they try to be good

I'm exactly like Percy Jackson and always have been and i'm autistic.So,autistic Percy Jackson is canon.End👏🏼Of👏🏼Discussion!!!!👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼

[cringeycopperz]

HELLO !! this is a sideblog for objecto and conceptum things for our whole system!! we have been posic since for as long as we can remember, even though we only recently found this term. we have autism, ocd, synesthesia, and psychosis which often affects / interacts with our pereceptions and attractions. not all objects are os/or but we percieve most objects and many concepts w some form of sentience

we had looked into the objectum community a few times over the past few years but, decided to accept it at least to ourselves and make this blog to find out more and have a place to talk about these things

we are very new and still learning things about objectum and our own attractions. so this will update every now and then :] our body is over 21 so minors please do not follow us, even if we dont end up ever posting nsfw we would just rather interact w 18+ only

tagging info and more below! (this is still a major wip so semi frequent updates / changes)

Alter Tags / Info

R = Romantic / P = Platonic / S = Sexual / F = Familial

⚡️ they / he — Factory machinery (R,S,F) Trains (P,F) Computers (R,P,S,F) Metals (R,P,S,F)

🖤 he / they — Knives (R,S,F) Gloves (S) Coats (R,P,F) Blankets (P,F) Plushies (P,F)

🌱 lich / it / she — Plushies & Figurines (R,P,S,F) Plants (P,F) Gardening Tools (R,S) Water (R,P,F) Mushrooms (R,P,F) Yarns & Fibers (R,P,F) Music (R,S)

🔥 they / he / it — Water (P,F) Knives (P,S) Plushies (P,F) Music (R,P,S,F) Headphones (R,P,F) Game consoles (R,P,S) Computers (R,P,F) Keyboards (R,S) Boots (R,S)

🍭 she / they — Paintbrushes (R,P,S,F) Sketchbooks (R,P,F) Clay tools (R,S) Plushies (P, F)

��� they / he — Keyed Instruments (R,P,S,F) Game Cabinets (R,P,S,F) Game Controllers (R,P,S,F) Microphones (S)

🔮 she / her — Books (R,F) Candles (R,F)

💊 any pronouns — Cars (R,S,F) Jackets (R,S,F)

📺 they / it / he / she — TVs (R,S) Microphones (R,S) Radios (R,S) Music (R,P,S)

🫖 she / her — Teacups & Teapots (R,P,F) Colors (R,P,S,F) Building / Houses (R,P,S,F) Wind Instruments (R,F) Dresses (R,S) Rotary Phones (R,S)

eventually we will also upload info about our objects and partners as well

[kakitysax]

💜🌼💙

💜 - What Label(s) Have You Identified With for the Longest?

I assume this one is referring to ACCURATE labels lol. Like labels we STILL identify with. In that case it would be asexual, which I realized when I was about 15. I didn't know about the aromantic part until some time later lol.

🌼- If you used any other labels before your current one, what were they?

Lesbian, Bisexual, Pansexual, Demigirl, Bigender, Genderflux, probably some I can't remember. It's been a ride and I'm not convinced anymore that I'm off it.

💙 - When you first learned about the Queer community, did you immediately realize ‘That’s me!’ Or did you consider yourself a ‘really good ally’ for some time?

I was a homophobe when I was 12 </3 Tragic really. Honestly, the biggest problem for me was the idea that you CAN be attracted to someone. I knew that gender was dumb and fake for a very young thing because of the autism and I thought that straight people were together like Just Cause You Gotta Be (aroace alert) so the idea of wanting to be with someone, especially based on gender??? so intensely that you're willing to defy everything just to be with them was strange and alien to me.

Then I got codependent with this other person of the same sex so it was like "oh shit that's me, I'm attraction so intense that I'm willing to defy everything." Then I realized it was abusive and left and I was like "if you *need* another person it's automatically going to be bad" (still not understanding what Normal Attraction Was) and then I was like "I'm queer but that's bad and being queer is bad, you should be straight and be together Just Cause You Gotta Be like everyone else"

Then I learned I was aroace and it fucked up my whole shop. I learned that some people are pulled to other people in like normal and not kirby-type all-consuming ways and it's a natural call for some people to feel and they just feel it towards the "wrong people" and I was like. Wjait. Wait. If straight people feel this towards each other and like get to have it then who the fuck are they to say that other people can't??? Gender isn't even real people are just PEOPLE like who are you to deny other people something that is evidently a natural human need?

But I gotta say, I still identify more as an "ally" than as part of the queer community. It doesn't seem like a lot of people want aroace people here and I'm still cis-passing, so I'm not gonna fight to be part of a place where I don't belong.

[sshewolfiona]

I really need some support right now!!

#follow me if you are willing to accept me for me and please tell me I'm not the only one that's confused about their gender identity these days ?

⛈️✨I'm at a low place in my life and I'm very much letting my depression get the best of me!🪐⛈️🪐⛈️🦕💕

I almost feel like I have no good reason to carry on anymore and that I should do everyone a fkn favor and off myself😓😥😟😖. I'm just gonna come out of the closet on here to basically whole world but I know not many will see my story; they will scroll by ... I know, I get it😢nobody ever had the time for me before in this life time so why now would I actually have even one person that is willing to listen and actually help me through my silent struggle... Suffering in silence is killing me that's why ... 💜⚡I'm here today to ...be able to say

🌈🌈🌈🌈🌈🌈🌈🌈🌈🌈🌈🌈🌈

🌈Coming out of the closet today🌈 everyone!! 😮❣️I can't keep my sweet silent lies down deep.. I'm here and I'm queer get used to it .🤐 Not really but listen if you'd like to hear my sexual identity crisis ..

I just have had one fck of a time on this Earth and finally at this age , oh my, 😮⚡⚡🌈 I find myself looking to LGBTQ hashtags and forums for answers on what's exactly wrong with me!!

Long story short : I knew there were many things about my inner world and the way I experienced it that made me very different from everyone.... And I have just found the words ; asexual 🌈💚 and aromantic so yes. I am Ace-Aro very very aro ... Sex repulsed aro ... And that's not all ... Actually I today, found that I have to admit I'm non-binary too. I've been ashamed and had found this part of my life, my sexual life, was very deeply embarassing and had not quite fit society standards and now I'm finally relieved a great deal that there are words for all that I'm going through and ii don't have to feel so weird about dating anymore I'll just be straight up about my sexual identity and preferences ........ For now tho. I have been seeing a dude that is heterosexual so this straight male is my partner. We are best friends.. and we have our own sex ONLY WHEN IM COMFORTABLE AND REALLY WANTING TO !!!! It's special occasion for sex to happen.. he has been molested as a child so he always understood how sex can be touchy and he NEVER pressured me. I feel like he could be not totally but on the spectrum of aromatic.... Idk .. we are good together so far.. but there is much more for us to move on from like personal past issues. We both need therapy for abuse and sexual abuse and before we deal with that then we will try bs support each other ... We are so shy and painfully awkward when it comes to gender roles or out own roles in the relationship like he's such a very sensitive man he really gets hurt by my just experience.. at first when I came out as asexual to him he said " so you don't find me attractive?? Why don't you find me attractive? What can I do to turn you on and make my appearance more attractive?!" And I was really for the first-time being faced with the real issue that actually " I don't find anyone attractive" so I hunted online for the solution. I felt broken and wanted a cure.

Lol

But it turns out I was born this way and iit is not a mental illness ...

I did go to the doctor tho....

I'm autistic .. diagnosed autism is scary ! It's a huge label. But it also makes me angry that all these years they diagnose Me this change it to that and I never got anywhere in any of the definition of bipolar and scizo such whatever the problem is is that ok I took so many meds I never needed and for years were not designed for my chemical imbalance which I never had turns out !!

Wow 😲 so much going on

🌈🌈So I found my true identity! Sexual identity,🌈😎😎🌈💚🖤 can I just be accepted and loved by some members of the #Witchcraft community or the LGBTQ community please at least LIKE. My post. And comment anybody wanna be my friend ?? I'm lonely lonely so lonely all on my only and I need someone to relate to other than these cis people !!!

[hypnosiacon-archived]

Not gonna lie the weirdest part of my identity that is connected to living in this country is that I never questioned it like being "valid" or whatever. Like I questioned only "why people hate it so much?" and just continued identifying with whatever I chose.

Like, when I saw people there hating on demi- aspec people and those who has even a slightest amount of interest in the attraction or relationship (Aspec can't have libido, they can't like sex / romance, they can't want that and they can't get any pleasure from that! /quote. Hate that) - I was confused why, but it led me to leave aspec community, not to become an exclus.

I saw people hating on mspec labels, saying that they are too similar and claiming that Bi means only two genders. You know, that is complete bullshit, but I can tell you for sure, I saw literally NO ONE who said the true meaning of Bi label. Well... I am SAM mspec aroace gay. They hate me a lot.

And the people who are trans / nonbinary who are hating on xenogenders and neopronouns... Like... Their arguments are very heavily about "how can you be this thing". Like, dude, you are joking all the time about your transition goals being an eldritch entity, or your gender being a secret third thing, but when someone says kind of the same - you are suddenly claiming that we are bad???

Also I could say that I've seen cis gays being scared of trans people who didn't chose a bottom surgery. Well, thanks, I guess.

Also the amount of ableism like autism and psychosis jokes, plus the hate towards alterhuman folks... This is ridiculous. I've seen only twitter people being probably somewhat okay with mogai as a whole, and, you know, I'm never gonna go to the twitter lmao. This is just sad, Duh. I am shocked I managed to never be an exclus at least in parts of my life that I remember.