#jamie campbell bower angst | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

jamies001fan · 2 years

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You Weren't There

pairing: Jamie x fem!reader summary: Jamie messed up, big time. Once he realizes what he's done, can he make it up to you? requested: yes! warnings: tears (a lot of them), mentions of anxiety but not any attacks, Jamie being a sweetheart & knowing he needs to make it better, a brief make out + 1 hickey, mention of Harry Styles bc he always cheers me up but y'all can picture whatever song you want wc: 8,474

“Love, I promise, once filming gets done, I’ll be at the showing! You know I’d never miss your beautiful work, angel.” He sounded serious because, well, he was. You had been over the moon with excitement for the past 3 months ever since you found out that you’d won a local art contest. The winners had their works shown in the largest gallery in the area, and it was a true dream for you to have others see the hard work you put into your paintings. Sure, the gallery wasn’t as large as MoMA or the MET, but thousands of people went daily to view the incredible art that was already there. Painting was a passion you had, and you didn’t bother trying to hide it. Everyone you knew either found out from you, from Jamie, or from the numerous photos you always shared. And thanks to the constant support and encouragement, you always felt confident with what you created.

“Filming gets over at 8pm, and it’s a 45 minute drive here, please be careful, Jamie!” You speak fast into the direction of your phone that’s currently on speaker as you finish putting your shoes on. Your eyes glance to your watch and see the bold numbers say ‘6:30pm’, and your heart skips a beat. “The showing starts in 30 minutes, baby. Even if you aren’t gonna be there until around 9, I know people are going to want to see you as well!” The words are spoken with an obvious tone of anxiousness as you picked up your purse and headed towards the door, your uber just pulling up as you walked outside.

“Like I said, I wouldn’t miss it for the world. But the real art is you, and you need to get going! I’ll text you when I’m on my way, baby. I love you!” The words made you feel less anxious as you said your goodbyes to each other and got in the uber. Your heart was beating fast from both nervousness and excitement the closer you got to the gallery. You were still trying to process how you managed to win, despite so many other talented individuals being in the contest with you. Countless nights where Jamie had to nearly carry you away from your computer because you were refreshing your emails every 5 minutes to see if you’d been chosen as the winner. Suspense was never your friend, but the 2 weeks where you didn’t hear anything back from anyone? It was surprising that you hadn’t lost your mind at least once.

The uber finally reached the gallery and you took several deep breaths after getting out of the car. Your thoughts were scattered, ‘what if no one actually likes my work?’, ‘no one's gonna know who I am.’, ‘is this really happening?’. But the one that was in the front of your mind, ‘I can’t wait for Jamie to see this, he’s been so excited for me.’. Before you started walking, you glanced at your watch and saw the numbers read ‘6:28pm’. It took a moment to hype yourself up before you made your way up the small staircase and pulled the door open, familiar faces already coming into view. Within seconds of walking inside, your close friends made their way towards you, congratulating you on your work. It was obvious that you were nervous, if Jamie were with you, you would be attached to him at the hip. He knew that you sometimes got nervous with crowds, and he didn’t mind speaking for you if he knew you weren’t up to it.

You gradually made your way over to where your painting was, the golden frame around it making your heart skip a beat. A smile spread across your face as you noticed more people looking at it, a small crowd forming in front of you. Your eyes kept glancing at your phone, keeping an eye out for a text from Jamie. Every now and then you’d have people ask you questions about your work, which you gladly answered with more passion each time. Hearing others tell you how they interpret your work was also interesting, as there was obviously no right or wrong answer. The way that art makes everyone feel a different way, whether it be paintings, music, photography, or writing, it all makes everyone feel something, and you love it.

You didn’t realize how late it had gotten until you checked your watch and the numbers read ‘9:30pm’. In a moment of panic, you check your phone thinking you missed a text from Jamie, and you felt your heart drop when there was nothing there. Just as you were about to text him to see if he was okay, one of your friends walked over and pulled you into a short hug, making your sudden anxiety go down a little. Another 30 minutes had passed without a word from him, and you felt like you could cry. The showing was over, and he hadn’t showed up, or even facetimed. Luckily, one of your friends drove you home, but the silence was deafening as you finally pulled into your driveway. Exchanging goodbyes and goodnights, you made your way inside, locking the door and leaning on it as you felt tears roll down your cheeks.

Noise from inside your bedroom only made the small anger inside you grow as you slowly moved to the door. It was ajar, and you could see Jamie on the bed watching tv, not a care in the world as to where you were. You push the door open and his eyes meet yours for not even a second, making you step in front of the tv. He had the audacity to ask you to move, and you only scoffed, turning the tv off. The silence filled the room for what seemed like hours, and the single illuminated lamp that was next to him made his features more prominent, as much as you hated to admit in the moment. As much as you didn’t want him to say anything to you that might piss you off, you knew it was going to happen, and you wanted to see how deep of a hole he would dig himself.

“Love, why did you do that? The show was almost finished.” He sounded annoyed. As if you had interrupted something important to him. You could tell he didn’t know about the showing, and that he forgot to text you, but you couldn’t bring yourself to say anything. “Don’t just stand there, either move or turn the tv back on. Can’t just turn it off when you want attention, I gave you attention earlier.” His hand moved to the remote, but yours blocked the sensor so it wouldn’t work, resulting in an eye roll from him. “What’s the matter, broke a nail?” The question was complete sarcasm, and you hated it.

“What’s the matter?” You asked in a low voice, an angry voice. “Maybe the fact that I was at my art showing for 4 hours without you texting or calling once. Or the fact that you weren’t there to drive me home? I knew you had filming to do, but you promised you’d show up, and you didn’t. My friends were asking where you were, and I said you were busy, preoccupied. I had strangers keep me company because you weren’t there. So I'm mad, Jamie. Actually, that’s an understatement. I’m livid right now. I wanted my other half, my better half, my partner of 3 years to be by my side, and he wasn’t. Don’t you dare act like I’m the bad guy for turning off your show, when you didn’t show up for me like you promised. Or do you not remember our conversation from earlier? Because I do, and that only makes it hurt more.” Tears were streaming down your face as you spoke, and his eyes went more wide than you’d ever seen.

“Shit. Baby, I’m so, so, so sorry.” He jumped off the bed and ran to hug you, slightly picking you up off the floor as he held you close to him. “After filming the guys wanted to get drinks and-”

“Drinks?” You cut him off as you pushed him away from you, fire in your eyes. “You got drinks with the guys instead of being there for your own partner? How long were you out for?” Your brief interrogation caught him off guard, but by the look in his eyes, you didn’t want to know the answer. His mouth opened to speak but you put your hand up, immediately silencing him. “You went out and had a few too many drinks as I was trying to not get overwhelmed with the amount of people around me. You know how I am with crowds, Jamie, and you just didn’t bother showing up? Your buddies were more important than me? I can’t fucking believe this.” Your throat had that pain in it, the feeling when you’re about to start sobbing but feel the need to hold back until you’re alone.

“I promise I had every intention of going to your showing, my love. Time just sort of.. got away from me.” His hand cautiously reached up the side of your face, brushing a stray hair behind your ear. More than anything, you wanted to lean into his simple touch, to pull him into you and feel him mold against you like the two pieces of a puzzle you both were. But your anger was too strong, not even the warmth of his hand on your cheek was enough to settle the fire inside of you. You could tell he thought he was in the clear from how he was leaning closer to kiss you, and you let him believe he was allowed for a second before you placed a firm hand on his chest, effectively keeping him at arm's length.

“Time got away from you, huh?” You asked calmly, rubbing your thumb against the soft material of his shirt, before pressing your pointer finger to his chest. He nods his head with a smile so small you’d have to squint to see it. “Lost track of it for so long that you didn’t think to check the watch you still have on? Or any of the numerous clocks on the wall of the bar, or even have a friend tell you? I doubt that the guys were holding you hostage, keeping you away from me. In fact, you told me that they were happy for me and that they wanted photos from the showing. You think saying sorry is gonna fix this? That it’ll be forgiven after you kiss me longer than 5 seconds? No, Jamie, you messed up. I don’t know how you can fix this, but it’s your own mistake, you find a way.” He let out a groan as you had fully backed him into a wall, tears again streaming down your face.

This was the first time you had ever seen Jamie really speechless. Sure, there were a few times you kissed him that left him mesmerized, but you could tell he was genuinely upset at how badly he messed up. He let you walk away from him and into the bathroom, locking the door behind you. Nearly the second the lock clicked, you were sliding down the door as tears continued to roll down your now very flushed cheeks. You sloppily pried off your shoes, shoving them away as a throaty groan left you, a sudden burst of air flooding your lungs after not breathing for an unknown time. The choked sobs from the other side of the door made Jamie’s heart ache, especially since he knew he was the cause. He walked over to the door slowly, hoping that some way you might sense him and know how ashamed he felt.

There were no other thoughts in his mind other than how badly he wanted to wrap his arms around you. When you have your moments, the moments where you can’t stop yourself from crying, he’s always right next to you. Holding you contently, listening to you ramble about whatever has you upset, wiping your tears with his thumb, playing whatever show or movie you wanted to watch to try and keep your mind off whatever hell your day had been. After consoling you many times, he knew how long it sometimes took you to cool down, whether he was helping or not. Even if he was the cause, even if he couldn’t hold your shaking body while you sobbed, he’d kick himself if he didn’t wait for you to be okay.

After not hearing anything for about 5 minutes, he thought it would make your night a tad bit easier if you had food to eat. You almost always asked him for a snack after a particularly emotional time, and he was never one to say no. It was always something simple; some crackers, half of a sandwich, fruit slices, he knew that something too heavy made your stomach hurt more after the tears. Sadly for you, a snack was the last thing on your mind. Your audible sobs had turned into silent cries, still very much happening and making your heart hurt more with each second. Did you want to forgive and forget this whole situation? More than anything. But you couldn’t bring yourself to forgive him so easily with this, considering he knew how important this was for you.

Your eyes were puffy, nose bright red, and throat sore. Still, you knew your barely there hunger was more important than you sitting on the ground. With slight hesitation, you opened the door and nearly fell forward from sitting down, not that it would’ve made the situation much worse. It would take time for the dizziness and pressure on your head to fully go away, so you weren’t planning to move fast. No sounds were anywhere within range, and you almost wanted to start crying again. Jamie always stuck around to make sure you were okay, so why didn’t he this time? ‘Was he that annoyed with you?’ ‘Or did he go out to the bar again, wanting to get drunk over seeing you like this?’ The thoughts invaded your mind as you slowly made your way to your feet, leaning on your bed frame as you tried to steady yourself.

Gradually making your way out of your room, you can’t ignore how your heart skips a beat when you see Jamie sitting on the couch. He doesn’t see you at first, only looking up from his phone when he notices movement from the corner of his eye. His heart breaks more when he sees your face, the faded makeup around your eyes from you wiping away tears, your lips dry from having to breathe through your mouth due to your nose being stuffy. Emotions were out of the question as he stood up from the couch and stepped over to you, pulling you into him. That caused more tears to come from you, these being more out of defeat than sadness. A weak yelp came from you as you felt yourself being picked up and carried into the kitchen. Jamie sat you on the counter before going to the fridge and taking out the fruit slices he’d cut up earlier. You kept your face down so he wouldn’t see how bad you looked, even though you knew he didn’t care. Regardless how bad you thought you looked, he always thought you were the most angelic looking human to ever exist. His finger gently hooked under your chin, tilting your face up to meet his eyes. There wasn’t an ounce of judgment or annoyance that you could see, and it made your heart flutter. He gave you a small smile before reaching to get a fruit slice, holding it out for you to take.

You didn’t realize how much you really needed something in your stomach until you tasted the sweetness of the fruit in your mouth. It wasn’t a big slice, just enough to make you want more. After having about 5 more slices, you nodded to Jamie, signaling you weren’t wanting anymore. He turned around to put the rest of it away, mumbling under his breath how proud he was of you for eating something despite maybe not wanting to. Not 5 seconds passed before he was back in front of you, rubbing a hand on your back to try and calm you more. There was barely any space between you both as he wrapped your legs around his waist and pulled you closer to him again. The faded scent of his cologne made you lean into him more, burying your face in his neck.

“Let’s get you out of these clothes, huh? It’s getting late, don’t want you sleeping in your fancy stuff.” He whispers, and you nod. You’d forgotten that you were still in your outfit, being preoccupied with your emotions for the past few hours. As Jamie picked you up again, you glanced at the clock on the stove and sighed to yourself when you saw the numbers flash ‘11:25’. Had you really spent that much time crying? Sure, you had a completely valid reason, but you hadn’t seen the time at all since you had been home. You’re sat on the bed and Jamie helps you change clothes, saying loving words to you the whole time.

Too tired to argue with him, you let him lay next to you and wrap his arms around you. You missed the feeling of him holding you, even if you were still mad at him. The more you cuddled with him, the more relaxed you were, and you knew this was what you needed after being a wreck earlier. Time seems to freeze as you focus on the sound of his heartbeat, curling up more into his side as your tired eyes shut. His lips gently kissing the top of your head and his hand softly rubbing your back were the last things you felt before falling asleep, along with a barely audible “I love you, my angel.”

The distant scent of vanilla slowly pulled you from your sleeping state, and you smiled to yourself when you still saw Jamie lying next to you. He was awake and on his computer, probably typing an email for work, but you didn’t care enough to ask. One of his hands was on the blanket that was covering you, just so you’d feel him close to you. You notice how dark your room is, the only lights being Jamie's laptop, a candle on his bedside table, and the hallway light that was visible under your bedroom door. Your hand came from under the blanket and grabbed his, squeezing it lightly to say you were awake. Instinctively, he brings your hand to his lips, pressing a tender kiss right above your knuckles. “Did you sleep well? Lit your favorite candle and turned the lights off, I know how sensitive you are to them after nights like the last one.” His voice was quiet as he turned his attention from his computer to you, not wanting to say the wrong thing but also not wanting to have too much noise right when you woke up. Your eyes meet his and the sapphire sparkles in the dim lighting, no doubt making you fall in love with him even more. A small grin comes on your face as you nod at his question, cuddling into his side more and resting your head on his chest again. “I really do want to apologize for last night, angel. You shouldn’t have gone through that, and I know it’s entirely my fault. My dumbass drank too much, not that it’s an excuse. Is there any possible way I can make this up to you?” He nearly stuttered over his words, and it made your heart ache.

“I’m not gonna lie and say it’s okay, because it isn’t. I was heartbroken when I didn’t see you, Jamie. Then to see you just lounging around and hear that you went out drinking instead? You knew about this for months, I watched you write it on the calendar, and you still made other plans. I don’t know how you’re gonna get back from this one, but I’m hoping you put in more effort than you did last night.” You roll out of bed, grabbing clothes before going inside the bathroom to change. Several deep breaths escape from you as you try to not think about how you were curled against the door just last night. Not needing to go anywhere, you put on the sweatpants and hoodie you grabbed, both smelling faintly of Jamie’s cologne. Your mind drifts off, thinking about how tightly he hugged you last night. His hugs made you feel so safe and protected. He made you feel whole, like you could do anything. When you first met him, you’d just recently come out of a somewhat long relationship. Sure, your now 3 years with Jamie wasn’t anything compared to your previous year and a half with your ex, but Jamie was the first partner you had that actually gave a shit. You knew this relationship would be different from the first week, after he surprised you with flowers just because he wanted to see you smile, or when he took the both of you on a much needed vacation and practically worshiped you the whole time. The first kiss you shared with him took your breath away, and you knew you were addicted to him. It felt like a drug, the way your love for him took over, and vice versa. Within 3 months of dating him, you couldn’t imagine being with anyone else. Pure magic is what it felt like on a daily basis, and your heart was full. Shuffling from your room pulls you from your thoughts as you open the bathroom door to see Jamie gone. A sigh leaves you while you walk into the kitchen and see a note on the countertop. “Making it up to you. I promise I’ll be back soon, don’t worry that pretty little head of yours. I love you, my angel. - Jamie”. Even the simple gesture of the note was enough to make your heartbeat a little quicker. There wasn’t a second that went by where Jamie didn’t love you and care about you. You both had your weak times like every other relationship on the planet, but there was never any bad blood between you both. He made sure you knew how much he loved you, whether it was with the actual words or gestures, he wanted you to feel appreciated and loved the second you woke up and the second you went to bed. Time went slowly the whole day, and very few messages from Jamie came your way. The occasional ‘Be back soon’, ‘Missing your beautiful face’, ‘I love you so much, darling’, all to which you responded with ‘please be careful, miss and love you’. It wasn’t a busy day, chores were done and you didn’t have anything urgent to respond to. While you didn’t want to spend the day wondering what he was doing, there was nothing else grabbing your attention. TV was crap and you didn’t feel like going out, not that you would on a weekday. Every bar/outing area was probably full to capacity and you really weren’t in the mood to be squeezed like a sardine in between people that were too drunk or high (or both) to care about your well being. All you felt like doing was having a quiet time to yourself, and that’s exactly what you did.

You don’t remember dozing off, but suddenly you were being woken up by Jamie’s lips on your cheek and his hand on your side. His eyes meet yours as they open, that golden smile making your cheeks turn the slightest shade of red. The silence between you was comfortable as he helped you up from where you laid on the couch. He led you into the kitchen and lifted you onto the countertop, standing in front of you until there was no room left between the two of you. Once his hands found a home on your thighs, a passionate kiss was pressed to your lips. It was the kind of kiss that took your breath away, like how he kissed you for the first time. There was no hesitation as you deepened the kiss, combing your hands through his hair and tugging lightly, earning a groan from him.

The kiss never broke as he carried you from the kitchen to your bedroom, laying you down as he got on top of you. Your legs wrap around his waist to keep him where he is, and his focus changes from your lips to your neck. He finds your sweet spot within seconds and sucks a faint mark onto your skin. You let out a quiet gasp as he presses another kiss onto the sensitive skin of your neck before pulling away. There’s no time to mutter out a word before he gives one more deep kiss to your lips, making you want more. To your dismay, he moves from you completely, freeing himself from your legs and rolling over to your side. A quiet laugh escapes him when he sees your face form a pout, and he places a delicate kiss on the tip of your nose.

“That was a treat for both of us, I could tell you needed a little pick-me-up recently. It’s luckily still early in the day, so what do you say we spend some much needed time together? We can do whatever you want, and we’ll stay out until you want to come home.” He crossed his arms and you rolled your eyes. You weren’t badly annoyed, just upset at yourself for letting him affect you this much. To say you wanted him to kiss you again and make you feel like you were on cloud 9 was an understatement, but the reminder in the back of your head that he wasn’t there for you kept poking through. It was easy for you to forgive and forget when the time was right, he knew this from all the times your friends pissed you off as a joke. However, he also knew that the bigger the fuck up, the longer it took you to find the heart to forgive a person, and he was determined to wait for as long as he needed to.

“As lovely as that sounds, could it wait until tomorrow? I’d like to mentally prepare myself for whatever it is we do.” You don’t mean for the words to come out as quietly as they did, but you felt shy for some reason. The both of you were normally touchy feely with each other, hugs and kisses were a part of your daily language. Even though you were still rightfully pissed at him, you did want to spend a day with Jamie. Just the two of you enjoying each other's company, maybe having a few too many drinks, or just doing whatever Jamie had planned; if anything. Your last date night was so long ago, the only thing you remembered was how it ended, it made you blush every time you thought about it.

“Of course my love, there’s not much to prepare for, but take all the time you need.” His words eased some anxieties you had as you looked over at him and met his eyes, making you blush and bite your lip from feeling bashful. He traces a finger across your cheek before tucking a loose strand of hair behind your ear and gently rubbing your cheek with his thumb. You automatically lean into his touch and it makes both of you let out sighs of contentment. The moments where you could just be with each other, holding each other, whether you were talking or not, those were your favorite moments. Trying to find the space inside your heart to forgive him would eventually happen, but it wouldn’t happen so soon. Turning onto your side so your back was facing him, he knew he wasn’t in the clear, he only hoped that what he had planned would fix some of what he caused.

The rest of the day went as well as it could’ve gone, eating dinner with each other, the love never fading from the space. Jamie was being more flirty than normal, not that it was an issue. He tried following you into the bathroom for your shower, you only chuckled and kissed his cheek before closing the door in front of him. Certain phrases that he knew made you flustered were whispered in your ear when you were getting water, his arms wrapping around you from behind as you blushed from his words. Before you both fell asleep, Jamie pulled you closer to him and held you in place with his tattooed arm. You felt safe, protected from the outside world, you felt at home.

Your eyes fluttered open to a somewhat dark room, the sunlight peeking through the blinds and birds faintly chirping in the distance. Jamie’s arm was still draped over you, less tight than when you fell asleep, but still firmly keeping you in place. You lightly run your fingers across some of his tattoos, just admiring the beauty of the art on the human you were lucky enough to call yours. Gradually, your feather light touches pulled Jamie from his sleep, his own hand gently grabbing yours as he fully woke up. He ran his thumb over your knuckles, craning his head up just to the point where he’s able to press kisses from your wrist to your fingertips.

“You ready to start the day, love? Can’t wait to see that beautiful face out and about. Check the closet, one of your friends sent their help picking your outfit when you were napping yesterday.” He presses a long kiss to your cheek before rolling out of bed, his morning voice echoing in your ears. Curiosity takes over as you kick the covers off and walk over to the doors, you didn’t know which friend came over, but they all definitely knew what your style was. The glance you gave to the mirror lasted longer than you thought it would after you changed clothes. Your hands gently went over the fabric and smoothed some of the wrinkles down to add the cherry on top.

“Are you gonna be my date for the day? You know how much I love my arm candy.” His arms wrap around your waist from behind and you see his face appear beside yours, and you couldn’t even try to hide the smile on your face. A sweet kiss is pressed to the side of your neck as he squeezes you a little tighter. The warmth from his hands could be felt through your clothes as he gently rubbed circles on your sides, his small smile lighting up the room like it always did. Your hands rested on top of his as you fully leaned into him, his cologne invading your senses, almost making your brain fuzzy. Again, the silence between the two of you was comfortable, you could stay in this same position all day and you wouldn’t be upset, but you knew Jamie had plans for the both of you.

“Always love being your date, my angel. I’ll never get tired of it. But we have things to do today, let’s get going.” He spoke playfully in your ear as he lightly smacked your ass after the last sentence. It wasn’t in a sexual way, more like in a ‘we gotta go, i’ll follow you out’ way. The car ride to the downtown area was mostly quiet, the radio was turned down almost all the way, but the view outside the car was better than any music could’ve been. It was the time of year where the seasons were changing, and luckily the leaves hadn’t fallen off the trees yet. Different vibrant shades of orange, red, and yellow were everywhere, and the air was so crisp and just chilly enough to where you didn’t need a jacket on.

Jamie’s glances over to you were missed as you looked out the window, but he didn’t care. As long as you had that smile on your face, the one that made his heart skip a beat when he saw it, the one where he knew you were genuinely happy, he was fine with seeing your side profile, he loved all angles of you the same. One of his hands moved from the steering wheel to your thigh out of instinct, lightly squeezing as his thumb caressed your clothes skin. You put your hand on top of his again and gave him a smile when he quickly looked over at you, your heart full already from the simple gesture.

“Do I wanna ask why we’re driving down a dirt road?” You giggle lightly as you ask and you can see his face light up at the sound. He parks the car behind a rather large bush before turning to you, his eyes having a different look in them. Your eyebrow raises as he reaches to the backseat and reveals a silk blindfold. “Don’t tell me we’re about to do something, baby. I’m all for spicing things up, but we’re in a public place, in a car, and in the middle of nowhere. This is testing the limits even for you.” His chuckle is lighthearted as he puts the blindfold on your lap, looking at you with pure adoration.

“If I say where we are, it’ll ruin the surprise. Put this on and I’ll help you out darling, nothing to be nervous about.” He presses a sweet kiss to your cheek and smiles when he sees your cheeks flush to a light shade of pink. No matter how many times he kisses you, he’ll never get tired of seeing you get flustered from it. You take a deep breath before you tie the blindfold over your eyes, careful to not get your hair tangled in it. Once it was fully covering your eyes, you searched for Jamie's hands in front of you. The familiar smoothness of his palm welcomed your hands as he squeezed them briefly before getting out of the car and rushing to your side.

“If you brought me to some weird ass place, I don’t even know an example, but if it’s something weird-” You cut yourself off with a laugh as you nearly trip over what you think is a tree branch. Jamie catches you, his ringed hands holding you a little more firmly as he guides you to wherever the hell you’re going. The ground beneath you turned from hard to soft, and you pictured it turning from dirt to grass. A slight whistle of wind makes goosebumps form and Jamie lovingly rubs your arms while giving you a sweet kiss on your lips. He stops suddenly, holding you in place as your heartbeat quickens with anticipation of what’s to come.

The blindfold is removed and your eyes take in the sight around you. Jamie brought you to a flower field, one that went as far as the eye could see. Sunflowers, daisies, peonies, and tulips were everywhere you looked in all directions. Even though the air was starting to get cooler, the flowers hadn’t started to wilt. It was like they were waiting for you to be there and appreciate the beauty that nature had to give before they went away for the winter. Apparently it looked like Jamie had been there earlier, the picnic setup on the ground in front of you looking like a dream you might’ve had at one point. You turn to him and he has his golden smile again, the one that makes you forget your troubles.

“I didn’t bring you to a weird ass place, I brought you to a cute ass place. You’ve always wanted a flower field picnic, so I figured why not have one now?” You both sat down on the blanket, the flowers consuming the both of you in the best way. All you saw were bright colors and Jamie, and that’s really all you cared for at the moment. The picnic was sweet, cheesy moments of you feeding each other strawberries, and loving moments where Jamie talked about the future he saw with you. Birds chirping in the trees caught your attention for a split second, leading to Jamie gently turning your attention back to him with a passionate kiss. It catches you off guard the slightest bit, but you don’t care.

“I didn’t know how badly I needed this. Just an us day. I love how thoughtful your mind is, baby. Really means a lot to me.” You put your palm on his cheek and he leans into your touch. He pulls something from his pocket and holds it in his hand. Your hand moves to grab your cup, taking a sip of the juice Jamie poured for you. A flash of light from the corner of your eye makes you look back to Jamie, and you see he’s holding the necklace you found at the jewelry store the other week. Something about the design made your heart happy, and it wasn’t just the gems. Each of them had their own unique sparkle in the sunlight, the colors being as vibrant as the flowers you were surrounded by.

“For the record, you look more gorgeous than this necklace ever will. But I knew it would make you smile, and that makes you look even more gorgeous.” Your heart swells at his words while you turn your body so he can put the necklace on you. It sits perfectly on your collarbone, and you swear that you can’t feel happier than that moment. “We’d better go if we want to have time for everything else.” He says after looking at the time. By looking around you, you could tell it wasn’t late in the day, which meant he had more planned. You were nervous, but more excited than anything else.

You make your way back to his car and put everything away before hopping back in, wondering where Jamie would be taking you next. It was another quiet ride, occasionally making eye contact which made you smile, and made him squeeze your hand gently. The dirt road turned back to gravel, and you saw the familiar shops that you’d pretty much grown up with. A few more turns came, and then the name of your favorite café came into view and you turned to look at Jamie again, your hand holding his a little tighter.

“How cliché, the place we had our first date. I love it.” You said it teasingly, but the love in your voice was unmistakable. He parked and got out, almost running to open your door so you didn’t have to, the natural gentleman in him jumping out. His hand took yours again, intertwining your fingers as you walked over to the door. The familiar scent of freshly baked sweets, amongst other things, filling the space around you. Jamie walked in behind you and got the attention of one of the employees who quickly made their way over to you. “We have your reserved spot right outside!” Your face turns to look at Jamie and you mouth ‘You reserved a spot?’ His hand on your back gently guiding you to the table was your answer, and the view made you stop in your tracks.

You were a local to the area, grown up not too far away from the main tourist attraction. Still, every time you came over, especially during the fall/winter times, you were mesmerized. The area looked like it could be right out of a tv show, all the café’s, arcades, even mini golf courses. All leading to a boardwalk that went out quite a bit over the crystal clear waters. During the summer it was always hot and even though it wasn’t a beach, the sea was still very populated during those months. Luckily you lived in a place that had actual cold seasons, not that 75℉/23℃ in December B.S., so it was like a winter wonderland in the cold. The sea hadn’t frozen over yet since the temperature hadn’t dropped that much, but the 65℉/18℃ was comfortable. Sounds of children laughing with their families flooded your ears while views of the sun just starting to set captivated your eyes. It almost looked like a rainbow in the sky, various purples, light blues, pinks, and gold colors painted across the cloudless canvas.

Jamie snapped you out of your thoughts, pulling out your chair and pressing a kiss to your forehead. You sat down to look at the menu while Jamie went back inside. The slight breeze made you shiver, but you weren’t fully cold, it was nothing a hot chocolate couldn’t help. If the whole location wasn’t ‘movie-esque’ enough, a butterfly landed on the menu right in front of you. Its wings almost glimmering with the different colors above shining down on it. As quickly as it appeared, it flew away, right as Jamie came back with his hands full. 2 hot chocolates, cookies, mini doughnuts, and 2 slices of pumpkin pie were on the tray he held.

“You weren’t looking at the menu, were you? My love, you know I already have your order memorized! We come here every year around this time, just wanted to spoil you a bit more tonight.” He kissed the top of your head before sitting down. Your hand came up to gently run over your necklace, feeling the detail of how everything fit together. Jamie held your other hand as he took a sip of his hot chocolate, the steam making his glasses slightly fog up. He didn’t want to overwhelm you with the food choices, he knew that if there was too much in front of you, you’d only pick at it and not have any. That was just one of the many reasons why you loved him, he always kept your feelings in mind, no matter what he did. Always making sure you were comfortable, and he always tried his best to make up for when he made mistakes.

“You’d think I know that by now, I mostly just check to see if anything new is added. It means a lot that you know what I get, I love that you pay attention to the small stuff.” You smile as you sip your hot chocolate before having a mini doughnut. It was as if time just stopped at that moment. Not only was the love of your life sitting across from you and looking at you like the goddess you were, but the sky continued to take your breath away. Nothing could’ve made this moment better, and you were happy that you got to spend it with the man who made your heart feel complete. “I really can’t believe you did this, Jamie. It’s all so stunning.” Your hands motion to the food in front of you and to the view around you. There were really no words to describe it other than beautiful.

“Says the one who looks like that, you’re the stunning one, baby.” He looks you up and down while giving you that look, and you can’t help the redness that appears on your cheeks. You both continue to eat away at what he brought out, taking your time with the pie since it was your favorite. Eventually you finished everything, including the hot chocolate, and then made your way onto the boardwalk, your finger intertwined with Jamie’s. “We still have one more place to go, and I think you’ll appreciate this one. Even though the light is hitting you just right, we have to get going again.” His hand traced the side of your face as he spoke, and the way he looked at you made your heart flutter.

“You’ve outdone yourself, Jamie. I don’t know what else there could be to do!” You pull him in for a hug just as a strong gust of wind hits you. He holds you close to him in such a secure way, it felt like nothing could tear you two apart. Your face buried in his neck and his hands rubbing your back, the now prominent scent of his cologne, it was all overwhelming your senses in the best way. The look in his eye when he pulled away didn’t leave any room for guessing, you knew what thought he was having and you nodded your head. There was no hesitation as he pressed his lips to yours, and you only deepened the kiss as he pulled you closer to him. Sadly, it was over sooner than you wanted it to be, his hands finding a home on your hips.

“My love, we still have to go somewhere else. Come on, it’ll be the finishing touch for tonight.” Laughter follows his words as he sees your faux pouting face. His hand grabs yours again while you walk back to his car for the 2nd time that night. You didn’t ask where he was taking you, but you trusted him with your life and knew that he wouldn’t make you uncomfortable. The radio was slightly turned up for the first time that night and you saw that Jamie connected his aux. He started typing in a song and you were curious, your eyes softening as you heard the opening piano playing. “Is it a sad song? Technically yes. But I know Harry makes you happy, so I’m happy to play it for you.” A quick kiss landed on your cheek before he started driving, humming along to the song playing.

You kept looking at the areas out the window, trying to figure out where Jamie was taking you. It wasn’t until you saw the steps that you put the pieces together. Your eyes landed on Jamie as he parked the car, you could tell he was trying not to make eye contact because he didn’t want you to be upset. A quiet sigh escaped from you, and it made Jamie nearly flinch when he couldn’t figure out the meaning of it. When your hand reached over to gently turn his face in your direction, you couldn’t decipher the emotion his eyes showed. There was a mix of worry, dread, sympathy, panic, and love, and you could almost cry from seeing how nervous he was.

“I’m not mad, baby. Not at all. I guess confused is a better term? Just didn’t think you’d want to be here.” You muttered the words more quietly than you intended, but he heard them loud and clear. He didn’t say anything back, instead getting out of the car and walking to your side as you unbuckled your seatbelt just as he made it over to you. Like earlier, he helped you out and intertwined your fingers as you made your way to the gallery entrance. Jamie pulled the key from his pocket and ignored your confused face for a second, unlocking the door and letting you in before him.

“I pulled a few strings, I had to see my beautiful girl's outstanding work.” Your heart beamed at his words for the hundredth time that night, walking behind him as he slowly approached the gold frame that still hung on the wall. “It’s absolutely magnificent, darling. There isn’t anything you can’t do.” He put an arm around your waist as you made your way over to him. You sadly couldn’t give him a more genuine smile as you remembered how you felt that night when he didn’t show up for you. The tears that spilled from you didn’t catch his attention, but the whimper that you tried to hold back did. The opportunity to turn your face away from him wasn’t an option as he turned you to fully face him.

“To say that I’m sorry is an understatement. There’s no excuse for how much of a dumbass i was. I knew this was happening, I made the plan to be here, and then it didn’t happen. I got too drunk and got a ride home, sobered up and just did my thing. Knowing that you were having a hard time, that you could’ve been having anxiety because I wasn’t there makes my heart break more every time I think about it. There will never be words to tell you how sorry I am, and I know that. Tonight wasn’t about you forgiving me, it was about me showing you how awful I felt, and still feel, about missing something that was so important and special to you. You always have been, and always will be the most important person in my life, and hearing you break down that night was one of the worst things I’ve ever heard, especially knowing I was the cause. You didn’t deserve that to happen, you only deserve the best, and I’m always going to be sorry that I caused you so much pain. The love of my life should never feel this way, my angel.”

More tears came from you at his words, and you could see them forming in his eyes as well. His thumbs wiped away your tears gently, while one fell down his cheek. You don’t know how long you just stood in the silence, but when he pulled you in for another hug, you let out a breath you didn’t know you were holding. It was like all the stress and worry and anxiety from inside just came out at once. He didn’t stop comforting you, holding you while you shook like a leaf from crying so much. Your arms gripped him tighter, not wanting him to leave, even though you knew he wouldn’t.

A shallow wave of relief came over him, he knew he was your safe place, and you were his. Though he couldn’t tell clearly if the tears were from how happy you were today, or if they were from you remembering how shitty you felt from the other night, he could tell the sigh you let out was from relief. Him letting you go wasn't a thought in his head at all when you hugged him even tighter, he just wanted to hold you until you felt better, until you felt whole again. If it took forever, he’d be there, after all, you were the love of his life, and he wanted to make sure you knew it.

a/n- again, i'm so, so very sorry for how long this took me to write. i wanted to make sure it was good since it's my first ever angst/fluff fic, and taking over 2 months was never what i planned on. i hope you all enjoy it, apologies once more 🤍

taglist: @hellfire-isnt-it, @hellfirebabes, @Ima1986 (wouldn't let me tag you) if you wanna be tagged in future fics, send me your user!

#jamie bower x reader #jamie campbell bower fluff #jamie campbell bower angst #jamie campbell bower x fem!reader #stranger things fluff #stranger things angst #001 stranger things #001 angst #001 fluff #jamie bower #stranger things #peter ballard #henry creel

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stxrliasfics · 1 year

Text

Catharsis - Jamie Campbell Bower Smut

Pairing: rockstar gn!reader x jamie (enemies to lovers kinda sorta ???)

Rating: Explicit

Word Count: 5.3k

(just now realizing i never explained: D/N stands for “Drummer’s name” and B/N stands for “Bassist’s name” sorry just in case you were confused LMAO)

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A/N: I have returned from hiatus with something new!!! To start off the new year, I present to you this wonderful masterpiece that was really intended for my two beautiful friends (they're big Jamie enthusiasts!)

Some say it’s better to keep your friends close and your enemies closer. That was utter bullshit to you. And maybe you were too callow to seemingly miss the meaning, but if your enemies were burning alive right in front of you, you wouldn’t even piss on the fire to put them out. Especially if it were Jamie Bower.

You’ve known him since you joined your band, replacing the former lead guitarist. There was limited interaction between you two from the start. 5 years since then and there has still never been a praising comment from him. It was always constant nitpicking at your solos or the way you played your parts entirely. He didn’t want to cooperate with you at all. You’ve come to realize that.

“You two need to get it together,” said your bandmate, D/N. The morning had started off just fine at rehearsal until Jamie was yelling about you continuously missing a note. “We have two more days until we play this fucking show and you’re acting like babies.”

Jamie glared your way as if the message was really intended for you. As if YOU were the problem. You glared right back at him, mentally boring holes into his skull with your bandmates in the crossfire of tension.

He took the strap of his guitar off his shoulders, threw the instrument down, and muttered something as he stomped off stage.

“Dick,” you called. The sound engineers came running with their clipboards and exasperated looks on their faces.

“Can someone go after him? We’ve barely made it through set,” One of them argued — a burly bald guy with a prominent Yorkshire accent. D/N hurried off the stage in pursuit of Jamie. You turned the volume off on your guitar, set it by the wall of amps, and sat down on a stool. Truly at a loss, you didn’t know which direction to take. You didn’t want to stay somewhere you weren’t welcome. Five years was long enough — but you couldn’t just give up that easily. You didn’t want to be seen as weak, you didn’t want to sulk around anymore and hope to gain the approval of someone so cruel. So you got up and turned your guitar back up.

When D/N came back with no Jamie in sight, relieving air filled your lungs. Your body relaxed.

“Come on, we’ve got a show to play, yeah?” You put your guitar strap back over your shoulder.

“But Jamie—,” B/N started.

“He ran off somewhere,” said D/N. “Got in his car and drove off.”

“We can practice without him,” you said, turning to the sound engineers. “Go on. We’re ready.”

The last few days of rehearsal surprisingly went by with no problems. There was a “Hurry up and get it done” frame of mind settling into everyone, so there was no time for Jamie to start throwing a tantrum. Neither of you two looked at each other for those last few days. You focused your energy more on your excitement for the big day as you stared out into the stadium, imagining all of the bright faces drunk on echoing notes ringing their ears. Everything was good until the show on Thursday.

For more content catered to the fans, you thought it would be a good idea to strap a tiny camera to your forehead, showing a different point of view of your playing. The headband that held the camera was unbearable. So much so that you could feel the elastic digging into your skin, itching below your hairline. Refraining from clawing at your skin, you kept your focus on your fingers dancing on the fretboard and the stinging in your muscles.

During the last song of the night, the last hurrah for the closing show, your eyes closed briefly and your body was thrown into the shockwave of the moment. When they opened, smoke carried off your vision and everything felt lighter. Before you knew it, you were flying above clouds of hands carrying you away. The exhilaration pumping cold through your veins, you lost awareness until you were brought back to the forefront. Every piece of you…except for the camera.

“Fuck, fuck, FUCK!” Jamie’s yells could’ve been heard all throughout backstage as he stormed after you, face red with anger. The show was done and everyone was starting to pour out.

You whipped around at him. “It was an accident!” The elastic strap was still itching the skin of your forehead.

“Hey, chill out,” said B/N, stepping in the middle with outstretched arms to hold you two apart. Jamie smacked their hand away.

“The camera. They lost the camera!” he was still glaring at you, harder than ever before.

“It was an accident! We can get it back.”

At this point, Jamie had stepped away from the boundary B/N placed and was getting closer to you. Hell’s blaze burned bright in his eyes. “It wouldn’t have gotten lost anyway if you weren’t being such a dumbass.”

“Get out of my face,” your voice dropped low and your eyes hardened. He took some steps back, jaw still clenched, and urged out his last word as always.

“You are the most useless thing that’s ever happened to this band.”

You watched him edge back out to the stage where fans cheered on his return. Your bandmates surrounded you with somber expressions, yet avoided the crossfire.

Apparently, the camera was found, but no one had told you that. When you arrived back to your flat the next morning, you had closed yourself up in your bedroom and slept the pooling anxiety away. Jamie’s words hit right at your pride. Useless rung in your ears to the beat of his tone. And you were really starting to believe that, but there was no way you were letting this continue on any further. Screw Jamie. Screw the band. You were out.

The biting wind of mid-November had come in for another time. Streets were covered in cold rain — normality for England. It had been raining nonstop for a few weeks. Cleary skies seemed rare. Your days lazing around the house were all the more dreary. With your band on a short break, you were left to dwell in your bed. Your final thoughts forced you to make a stomach-churning move — a compulsive decision that could possibly break the bridges.

You were going to talk to Jamie.

The night before, you were pacing the room with your phone in your hand. Every thought that bubbled up into a word didn’t make sense. Every sentence frayed into a mere memory. It would’ve been difficult to get up with him, considering that you two weren’t really on speaking terms. He did reply to your message hours later. With a thumbs up emoji. You started to get irritated but a thumbs up was better than no response at all.

You planned to meet up at a cafe near your flat that morning. It was still rainy, so you made sure to grab an umbrella. You rehearsed everything that you were going to say over in your head, silently mouthing it to yourself as you reached the place. Jamie hadn’t arrived yet. There was no sign of his light blonde hair given. You ordered a small coffee to hold your patience in the meantime.

Heat transferred from the paper cup, warming your frostbitten hands. If it weren’t for all the eyes around you, you would’ve used it to warm your face as well. Possibly fans trying to scope out. Their eyes left you as soon as the cafe’s door jingled and Jamie walked in.

His hair was tied up and he was wearing all black. Standard Jamie attire. Further more, this made him recognizable amongst the teen fans gawking at you two. You could see his hardened demeanor although he tried to be stoic. When he sat down in front of you, your throat had dried up and everything you wanted to say flew south. You went bitch.

“Hi, Jamie,” was all that could come out. It didn’t even sound like you. All shaky and weak. Sometimes confrontation wasn’t your strongest suit. It didn’t help that you couldn’t see his eyes. Was he looking at you or behind you?

“About the camera,” you tried your best not to stutter. “I’m sorry for being ignorant about it.

A short exhale meant to be sarcastic laughter escaped from Jamie. His face stayed blank.

“You’re not going to say anything?” you poked on.

“What do you want me to say?” his voice was foreign. Softer than what you were used to but still housed a cold undertone.

“The way that you’ve been treating me lately. I’d like an explanation for it.”

He looked out of the window with his arms crossed on the table, not saying a word.

“What’s your problem with me, mate? I work my ass off and you act like I do nothing. If the camera thing was the last straw then once again, I apologize. I seriously didn’t mean to do it.”

He looked from the window to the table, watching it in a few seconds of silence. The whole time you watched and waited.

“I don’t have a problem with you,” he said. Thinking you had imagined it, you eyed him in confusion.

“You wouldn’t just shit on me for nothing, then.”

He only gave you a shrug. You probed further.

“What is it? What do I need to change for you to like me?” you hissed. “What’s your problem with me?—”

“Excuse me. We’re big fans of your music,” Two girls who looked like they were no older than 15 came up to your table. “Could we please have a picture?”

“I’m so sorry, we’re in the middle of a private meeting,” you apologized. The girls frowned and issued profuse apologies for interrupting you two before Jamie butted in.

“We can give you our autographs if you have something for us to sign, though!”

Once again you had to do a double take as Jamie was now smiling. He sounded so sweet. Of course, that was the mask always on display for anyone outside of the band. He held a genuine smile when talking to the girls, taking in every word they said to him. When the girls left, however, he returned to his normal self. You wondered how he made it seem so genuine. Maybe he wasn’t just faking it with them.

“So?” you said. He turned back to you.

“So?” he said. That nonchalant tone of voice irked the hell out of you. He didn’t care. Was he even listening to you?

“I want an explanation. An apology. Something!”

Jamie shrugged again. It took all your might not to smack the shit out of him right then and there.

“Fine,” Gritting your teeth in uproaring anger, you began to sit up with your still full coffee in hand. “I’m out of the band.”

You pushed the door to the cafe open, holding back the hard lump in your throat and trying to take a deep breath before it all went out. You had let it all go. Everything you worked hard for. You regretted it, but it didn’t matter. You could get anywhere on your own. Fuck everything.

Ever since that day at the cafe, there had been no contact between you or anyone from the band. Radio silence. It wasn’t until one Saturday evening that B/N called about a party. You had no plans to go out. Still, it wouldn’t have hurt to show your face. You were sure your bandmates hadn’t known about your self-dismissal.

You got ready at 9:00, 15 minutes before you were to meet up with them. Silently, you hoped that a certain someone wouldn’t be there. Really, you didn’t want to face anyone right now. Something about it was too embarrassing.

All of your friends were meeting up at a nightclub. Big and fancy, it was. One of the biggest in the city, perhaps. Only high-profiled people filled it up. Your band had played here before.

It was one of the club's usual busy nights. Anything that you could think of went down here. It was a chance for everyone to go buck wild and let loose for one night before they got up in the morning with a bottle of aspirin and an unkempt tie. For these to be important people in the industry, you’d think they’d be more civilized. Then again, you thought of what industry you were apart of. Yeah. A band manager snorting coke off of a pornstar’s chest wasn’t surprising.

Through sweaty bodies and seizure-inducing lights, you couldn’t see your bandmates at all. You dialed B/N’s number and hoped that they would be able to hear you over the thumping music. During which, some drunk asshole had bumped into you rather harshly, nearly knocking your phone out of your hand. You gave the guy a side-eye and held the phone up to your ear.

“Hey,” B/N’s voice came through the speaker after the second dial tone. “You on your way?”

“Yeah, I’m here,” you yelled over the music. “Where are you?”

“V.I.P. room. It’s at the back,” they said. “Fair warning, though—”

“What?!” you covered one ear with your index finger to try and hear better.

“I’ll just tell you when you come over. I’ll be waiting outside of the curtain.”

Their voice was replaced by the beep of the call ending. You huffed out a sigh of annoyance, still pushing past a bunch of people. You finally saw the V.I.P. lounge and B/N where they said they would be. They waved you over.

“Hey,” you said. This area of the club was quieter since there weren’t any speakers nearby.

B/N looked to be on their toes. You couldn’t put your finger on it. It was like they wanted to tell you something but it wouldn’t get past their lips.

“What’s up?” you spoke again.

“Jamie’s in there,” they said lowly. As soon as those words left their mouth, the purple curtain shielding the V.I.P. lounge drew back. Your eyes shifted to an emerging Jamie holding a giggling person's hand. He didn’t look up at you. Neither of them did. You rolled your eyes.

“So?” B/N said.

“So,” you shrugged. “I’m not going to let that ruin my night.”

Again, you tried to seem nonchalant. In truth, WANTED a reaction. Just a simple glance would do. You wanted to be seen. Maybe just to shoot him an even meaner look than what he would’ve given you. And you knew that he had seen you. Why wasn’t he saying anything? No thoughts on the meeting from a few weeks ago at all?

To further prove your point that you didn’t care (and why would you?), you wasted the night away by downing drinks. Not too many, but enough to get you a little buzzed so that you could take on the rest of what the night would bring. You sat in your invisible bubble at the bar, contemplating exactly why you would care. Why it was so important to get Jamie’s attention. You downed a shot of your drink. It fired up your insides in a quick flash, starting from the tip of your ears and down. There was no use in thinking about this. What more could you do?

Floating into your absent land, the smell of spicy cologne filled your nose. You felt someone lean into you from the side and whisper in your ear.

“I need to talk to you,” the voice said. You turned to see it was Jamie. Shadows danced in his piercing eyes, the same way they did whenever he was trying to be intimidating.

“What do you want?” you said in a monotone.

“Please. I’ll be quick.”

The two of you disappeared to the upstairs lounge in the club. There was a bar up here too, occupied by people having more civilized and controlled conversations. You ambled over to the black couches nearby and took a seat, Jamie sitting beside you. You stayed in awkward silence for what seemed like forever. From beside you, the man was engaged in thought, trying to find something to say. He had his hands clasped as if he were saying a prayer and held it close to his mouth.

I don’t have all day, you mused. His sigh filled your thoughts.

“I’m sorry,” he started off. He wasn’t looking at you. His eyes were trained on the floor.

You waited for more, then said, “How do I know you mean it?”

“No, I do. I really do mean it.”

“You still haven’t answered my question,” you said, looking at him. “Remember?”

“I don’t hate you,” he replied. Not at all.”

There was a flash of amusement on your face. That was the only emotion you could find.

With another sigh, he repeated like a broken record, “I don’t hate you, Y/N. Quite the opposite.”

You quirked a brow as if to tell him to go on. He wanted to. His lips were moving as if grasping for something in the air and pulling it to his cords.

“I-I don’t know,” his voice went low.

“You know what, you’re a dickhead,” you took another sip of the sharp tequila. “Good job. Good fucking job.”

“On what?”

“You’re just…so hard to figure out. I don’t get you.”

“I didn’t mean what I said that night. When I said you were useless to the band and all that. That’s not true at all.”

A satisfied grin was urging on your lips as you had gotten what you wanted. You hid it with the rim of your cup. Down went the last drop and you set the cup down.

“I admire you, Y/N,” he went on. “A lot, actually.”

“So what’s up with you being a dick to me then?”

“I guess…I’m jealous of you.”

The way his words edged out so hesitantly, you didn’t believe it. Because why in the world would Jamie Bower be jealous of you? But his demeanor, the softness in his body language — if he were playing a joke on you, he did a damn good job at acting.

“Oh, bullshit,” you said dismissively.

“You’re an amazing guitarist, and you're the most poetic person I've ever met,” he rattled on. “You're everything I want to be and I just...hate that I'm not, I guess. You’re the backbone of our band."

Really looking at him this time, you could tell he meant it. There was sincerity hidden in that black heart of his. You never thought you’d see the day. There was no room in you to take this in.

You stammered, “I—uh—got to get going.”

Jamie shot up from the chair when you did and trailed after you. “Wait, Y/N. You’ve had too much to drink,” he said. “Let me take you home.”

“No, I’m fine.” you waved him off and walked back downstairs. The beating music in the main part of the club filled your ears once more, pounding a headache into your head. You wanted tonight to be a brain fog in the morning. One that you couldn’t remember for a long time. You couldn’t tell if it was embarrassment or if it was the praise you always wanted getting to you. Your face was hot and flushed from being flustered as you ran out of the doors. You could sense that he was still following you. His presence loomed over like a shadow.

“Y/N,” you heard him call, proving your suspicion right.

“I’m calling a taxi,” you said, searching your coat pockets for your phone.

“Listen to me. I meant what I said back there. I really, really admire you.”

“That doesn’t just take away the constant hell you’ve been putting me through this whole time,” you argued. “What? Out of envy? Get fucked.” your fingers typed aggressively on the keypads.

“Y/N,” you felt him grab your shoulder and spin around. Your legs turned to jelly from the sudden touch. You hated that. Jamie was so close you could feel nearly every fiber of him. Smoke from the cold night air escaped past his parted lips. “I’m so, so, sorry. Please, if I have to get down on my knees just to keep you in the band then I will. I’m sorry for being so shitty.”

Too nervous to meet his eyes again, you looked to the concrete. Your heart was racing so much, fluttering butterflies trapped in your throat.

“Let me take you home,” he said again. “Please?”

“What happened to your friend from earlier?” you said. The image of them holding hands flashed in your mind.

“Someone to fill up space, I guess,” he muttered. Both of his hands were placed on your shoulders, forcing you to look at him. There was a sense of sudden gravitation towards this man. Something that was so unfamiliar you were questioning yourself. Could you still hate him even after this?

“You really are something, Bower.” your whisper was carried by midnight’s wind.

It was like the space between you was getting tighter. Your eyes traveled to his lips which were half covered by the lights of the nightclub. You didn’t get any closer but paid attention to the way his soft lips moved as he spoke.

“Will you let me take you home?”

You nodded. “I’ll just tell B/N that I went with you then.”

For the first week of the new month, you distracted yourself with music. Your bandmates still knew nothing of you quitting, as far as you knew. Your mind was still consumed with Jamie Bower and that night at the club. How quiet and frail the air seemed during that car ride. How his goodnight made you burn up more than the tequila you were drinking. Everything you did to ignore it didn’t work. You guessed that it could’ve been some obsessive type of thing. What other explanation was there?

Currently, you were stationed at your desk, scribbling down lyrics and humming along to match them. Nothing would work along with these words. You kept scribbling and erasing, scribbling and erasing; until finally, you cracked and threw your pencil at the wall.

You forced yourself out of the chair to go to the fridge. The only thing that could put an end to this madness right now was a bottle of good ‘ole Jack, which you happened to have. Call you careless for drinking so early in the morning, you didn’t give a shit. It was nice and ice cold. Mind-numbing enough to delete whatever it was you tried to explain to yourself.

You slumped down on the couch, watching some talk show when a knock came at your door. You were too lazy to get up and hoped that it was for someone next door.

The knock came again and you grumbled. “Come in!” you shouted.

“It’s locked,” a voice said from behind the door. It seemed you had no other choice. You got up from the couch, annoyed. And much to your dismay upon opening the door, Jamie was there.

“Oh,” you said.

“Can I come in?” he said. He was wearing a black top and a pair of skinny jeans. Sunglasses adorned the top of his head. You nearly dropped the bottle.

“Uh—yeah—sure.”

You stepped aside to let him in, cursing yourself inwardly for somehow manifesting this. How lucky it was to have him show up on the day of your self-concentration.

“I came to check on you,” he then said, answering a question that was just forming in your brain. Was he reading your mind or something? “I hadn’t heard from you in awhile.”

“I’m fine,” you plopped back down on the couch and felt it dip when Jamie sat beside you.

“You told me that you’d call the day after and you never did.”

“Forgot,” you muttered, taking a sip of your drink.

“Jesus, Y/N, it’s only 9 in the morning.”

“Don’t pretend like you care.”

“I do. Or else I wouldn’t have come here.” his cold and calloused fingertips grazed the hand that held the bottle of your ease over and over. You had a faint realization that it would slip out of your grasp, but it didn’t. Something else had caught it while you were under Jamie’s hypnosis. He had the bottle in his hand. You watched him set it down on the coffee table in front of you.

“I still don’t know if I trust you,” you said, half-jokingly.

A small smile formed on his lips when he turned to you. “I understand. I only hope to earn it as time goes on.”

You sensed your lips tugging on to a smile as well and bit the inside of your cheek to hide it.

“You know I do care,” he said, almost in a whisper. He was closer to you now. Like magnets, you were pulled to each other; pulling to the ecstasy that lay in this tension. Only then when your noses were touching, you realized what you were doing. But in his warmth, nothing else mattered. You thought all of the butterflies would be washed away under sweet oak whiskey only to find them return at his touch. Maybe this was a form of trust.

“I’m sorry,” Jamie pulled away immediately. “I’m so sorry.”

“No, don’t,” you said, grabbing his face with both hands to hold on to this last moment. You didn’t want it to end here. Not with how good everything felt in this moment. Your heart was skipping beats. You thought you would go into cardiac arrest. Your whole world was engulfed in Jamie.

When he pulled away a second time, you both were panting for air. He rested his forehead on yours, eyes clouded with hazing lust. You thought they looked beautiful.

“Y/N, I have to be honest,” he said in between the sound of your soft pants. “I want you. If you’ll let me—”

Your lips collided again as your hands roamed his body. You could smell the tobacco leaves protruding from him, getting drunk off of this scent alone. You moaned softly into the kiss.

It felt like your entire being was pulsating, waiting for this magical moment. Jamie had to have felt the same too. He looked as if he could lose it at any moment.

“Do you want to stay here or go to the bedroom?” you asked. “There’s more room.”

“Whatever you want,” he replied and started to trail pecks down your neck. You moaned, biting your bottom lip.

“Let’s go then.”

Jamie followed behind you like a lost little puppy as you carried him upstairs by the arm. Once the two of you were inside your bedroom he spun you around and picked you up, placing you on the bed. You giggled as he climbed on top of you.

“I don’t have a condom,” he muttered into your neck.

You reached over to your nightstand and opened the drawer, pulling out a blue box of latex condoms and a bottle of lube, throwing it over to him. He snorted a laugh, picking up both.

“Why do you have these?”

“Just in case, you know,” you shrugged and watched him examine them. “Hurry up. You’ve already got me riled up.”

Jamie chuckled. “I have to admit, I’m a bit jealous.”

“Awe, someone’s jealous?” you slid your hands under his shirt, contacting the warm skin and bones underneath. You felt him shudder. Perhaps because your hands were freezing cold.

“Very,” his hands traveled to your thighs. “Can’t have anyone else touching you.”

“Already possessive, are we?” you helped him lift his shirt over his head, throwing it to the floor. Both of your clothes had been discarded, stored away in the confines of your worlds with the least worries.

Once you two were prepped, you took advantage by wrestling him to the sheets and climbing on his lap. Seeing him in such a vulnerable state shook you all around. His nails grazed your thighs, leaving faint and temporary red marks. Soft gasps came from your lips as you sunk down on his cock. The feeling of it twitching inside drove you even madder, your heat quivering around it. You began moving your hips with Jamie's eyes holding you. His hands gripped your hips. You moved faster and faster, moaning at the immense pleasure in your core.

“Jesus, Y/N,” he groaned, admiring the view of your sweaty body. Every thump inside sent you into overdrive. It was like a fire had started in your body, carrying off from your chest down to your toes. Your hands grasped at his pecs. You leaned down, breathless, bouncing on his thick cock as if your life depended on it. His punched-out moans vibrated your eardrums.

“That feel good?” you gloated with a smile.

“Fuck yeah,” was all he could muster. You began marking his neck with hickeys, sucking and biting while you drove his soul out, letting out a pleased hum when you found your spot. “You gonna come?” he says, deep voice penetrating your ears. You moaned again, digging your nails into his pecs. Your body shuddered as your orgasm hit. Jamie held you tighter. You never thought you’d be this close before.

You didn’t stop moving your hips, wading through the aftershocks and overstimulation with tightened eyes. Not long after, Jamie had come too, letting out a relieved sigh as he spilled into the condom. You thought it to be twisted how you wanted to feel every bit of it. Greedy, almost. How you wanted to just get rid of this god-forsaken barrier and feel ALL of him. It wasn’t nearly as good as having it drip out of you.

A small gasp left your throat at the loss of heat when he slipped out. But he was still hanging on to you as he sat up, edging his tongue in your mouth one last time.

You broke away from him, saying, “I can’t believe we just did that.”

“Me neither,” he replied. “That’s not to say I didn’t enjoy it, though.”

You scooted away from him and watched as he removed the condom, throwing it in the bin and grabbing his clothes. A frown was about to slip on your face, realizing it was all over.

Jamie must’ve noticed when he glanced at you. It took him no time to slip his clothes back on.

“Why the long face?” he said, sitting down beside you on the messy sheets.

“Nothing,” you gave him a thin smile. “Just…where exactly do we go from here?”

“Well, I don’t want to stop talking to you or anything.”

“I don’t either. It just feels weird.”

Jamie’s brows furrowed. “Weird?” The look made you a bit nervous.

“Not like a bad weird,” you explained quickly, laughing. “I mean, we’ve never been on the best of terms, Jamie. We just fucked.”

“True,” he smiled. “I do hope that this…situation doesn’t affect us. I want us to be on good terms. Not just as bandmates, you know?”

“Of course.”

He pecked you on the cheek and stood up. “Gotta get going,” he said. “We’re heading to the studio today. Do you want to come?”

“Don’t know if I can,” you chuckled.

“I never told them you left. Don’t worry. Your spot’s always open.”

The two of you said your final goodbyes that day. It was like nothing had ever happened. You were left with nothing but a ghost of your time. Crawling up into your bubble again, you wondered just how much more confusing Jamie Bower could get from here. It wasn’t very fun when you were still figuring him out.

#jamie campbell bower x reader #fanfiction #fanfic #jamie campbell bower fanfic #jamie bower #jamie #smut #jamie bower smut #jamie campbell bower smut #oneshot #bower #jamie bower rpf #jamie campbell bower rpf #jamie bower x you #enemies to lovers #jamie campbell bower angst #angst

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bebx · 8 months

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“I don’t need therapy because my comfort characters are my therapy” and it turns out the comfort characters in question are the ones who need therapy the most

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agirlwholovesrockstars · 4 months

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𝖄𝖔𝖚 𝖒𝖆𝖐𝖊 𝖒𝖊 𝖋𝖊𝖊𝖑 𝖇𝖗𝖆𝖓𝖉 𝖓𝖊𝖜 | by : 𝓐𝓰𝓪𝓽𝓱𝓪

𝕾𝖚𝖒𝖒𝖆𝖗𝖞 : you flee from your kingdom after you found out about the secret agenda from your groom to be, you got into an accident in the forbidden place, who would risk to save you when its against from your world to interact with the other side?

𝖂𝖆𝖗𝖓𝖎𝖓𝖌𝖘 : 18+ Knight!Eddie Munson x FEM!Princess Reader, language, reader and Eddie are both (21), amnesia, vi0lence, murder, arrange marriage, bl00d (not gore), the story is set in 17th century

𝕻𝖆𝖎𝖗𝖎𝖓𝖌𝖘 : Knight!Eddie Munson x FEM!Princess Reader

𝖂𝖍𝖆𝖙 𝖙𝖔 𝕰𝖝𝖕𝖊𝖈𝖙 : MDNI‼️angst, fluff, eventual smut, upside down exists in this story, dark fantasy, action, romance

𝕹𝖔𝖙𝖊 𝕿𝖔 𝕽𝖊𝖆𝖉𝖊𝖗 : I missed making series and I've been wanting to make this for such a long time and I hope you'll enjoy it and love it :))

𝕬𝖚𝖙𝖍𝖔𝖗 𝕹𝖔𝖙𝖊 : if you listen at the song down below, you will understand more of what I'm trying to do with this series!

REBLOGS ARE DEEPLY AND HIGHLY APPRECIATED! 🥺🫶🏻✨

☆ EDDIE MUNSON'S MASTERLIST ☆

❣ AGATHA'S MAIN PAGE ❣

(*EACH PART HAS THEIR OWN DETAILED WARNING, PLEASE READ THEM FIRST BEFORE CONTINUING!*)

𝕡𝕣𝕠𝕝𝕠𝕘𝕦𝕖

✦ 𝓒𝓱𝓪𝓹𝓽𝓮𝓻 𝓞𝓷𝓮 : o𝚗𝚕𝚢 𝚢𝚘𝚞, 𝚌𝚊𝚛𝚎𝚍 𝚠𝚑𝚎𝚗 𝙸 𝚗𝚎𝚎𝚍𝚎𝚍 𝚊 𝚏𝚛𝚒𝚎𝚗𝚍

✦ 𝓒𝓱𝓪𝓹𝓽𝓮𝓻 𝓣𝔀𝓸 : 𝙱𝚎𝚕𝚒𝚎𝚟𝚎𝚍 𝚒𝚗 𝚖𝚎 𝚝𝚑𝚛𝚘𝚞𝚐𝚑 𝚝𝚑𝚒𝚌𝚔 𝚊𝚗𝚍 𝚝𝚑𝚒𝚗

✦ 𝓒𝓱𝓪𝓹𝓽𝓮𝓻 𝓣𝓱𝓻𝓮𝓮 : 𝚃𝚊𝚞𝚐𝚑𝚝 𝚖𝚎 𝚑𝚘𝚠 𝚝𝚘 𝚕𝚒𝚟𝚎 𝚊𝚐𝚊𝚒𝚗

✦ 𝓒𝓱𝓪𝓹𝓽𝓮𝓻 𝓕𝓸𝓾𝓻 : 𝚈𝚘𝚞 𝚐𝚊𝚟𝚎 𝚖𝚢 𝚙𝚛𝚒𝚍𝚎 𝚋𝚊𝚌𝚔 𝚝𝚘 𝚖𝚎

✦ 𝓒𝓱𝓪𝓹𝓽𝓮𝓻 𝓕𝓲𝓿𝓮 : 𝙸'𝚕𝚕 𝚗𝚎𝚟𝚎𝚛 𝚏𝚒𝚗𝚍 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚠𝚘𝚛𝚍𝚜, 𝚖𝚢 𝚕𝚘𝚟𝚎

✦ 𝓒𝓱𝓪𝓹𝓽𝓮𝓻 𝓢𝓲𝔁 : 𝚈𝚘𝚞'𝚛𝚎 𝚜𝚘𝚖𝚎𝚘𝚗𝚎 𝚠𝚑𝚘𝚖 𝙸 𝚌𝚊𝚗 𝚍𝚎𝚙𝚎𝚗𝚍 *JUST RELEASED*

✦ 𝓒𝓱𝓪𝓹𝓽𝓮𝓻 𝓢𝓮𝓿𝓮𝓷 : 𝙷𝚘𝚠 𝚌𝚊𝚗 𝙸 𝚛𝚎𝚙𝚊𝚢 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚏𝚘𝚛 𝚑𝚊𝚟𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚏𝚊𝚒𝚝𝚑 𝚒𝚗 𝚖𝚎? (✎ still in progress)

#Spotify #eddie munson x fem! reader #eddie munson #eddie munson fic #stranger things 4 #eddie munson x fem!reader #eddie munson x female reader #eddie munson fluff #eddie munson x y/n #eddie x fem!reader #agirlwholovesrockstars #eddie munson series #eddie munson supremacy #eddie munson stranger things 4 #henry creel #eddie munson angst #joseph quinn #jamie campbell bower

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henrywinterswhore · 2 years

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you can't convince me that Jace Herondale is not what people on wattpad want Harry Styles to be

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harrywavycurly · 1 year

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Welcome to the masterlist for The Cheater Joseph Quinn series! In this series Joe has done the unthinkable and cheated on you, this series will show how you found out and how you deal with it and eventually move on from it. You’re probably wondering why Dacre is in the middle of the banner and that’s because while Joe might’ve broken your heart someone with an Australian accent comes along and fixes it. If that sounds interesting to you then here we go!❤️

*this is mainly a texting series but I’ll have all the other stuff linked below as well*

Status: Complete🖤

Requests: here

TW: Mentions of cheating and cursing

Conversations: coming soon✨

Instagrams: here

Everything Else: here (if you’re not caught up there might be spoilers in here)

Part 1: Where are you?

Part 2: Boxes

Part 3: Coffee and Donuts

Part 4: Goodbye

Part 5: It takes Two

Part 6: Thunder from Down Under

Part 7: Just Answer the Question

Part 8: Tell Me Everything

Part 9: Pathetic

Part 10: Might As Well

Part 11: Can We Talk?

Part 12: The J Crew

Part 13: Nightstand

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mimixmunson · 3 months

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❀ masterpost ❀ blurbs ❀ ao3 ❀

minors do not interact, this blog is 18+

About me:

˖⁺‧₊˚ ♡ ˚₊‧⁺˖ Mimi. 21. UK. Smut enthusiast. Eddie Munson’s cumslut. Steve Harrington’s fleshlight. Resident knismo of the Steddie fandom.

Asks/dms/requests

˖⁺‧₊˚ ♡ ˚₊‧⁺˖ My asks are open! I am taking requests.

Who/what do i write?

˖⁺‧₊˚ ♡ ˚₊‧⁺˖ I only write for fictional characters, I will not write anything about celebrities. It makes me uncomfortable. I only really write for Stranger Things, especially Eddie Munson. I can write Steddie and Steve Harrington too. For some reason people seem to like me writing Gator Tillman from Fargo season 5 so you may see that here too! Another thing to note is that I mostly write smut, but sometimes fluff. With this I also write tickle fiction because I have a weird interest in that, if that’s not your thing please just ignore those posts!!

super cute divider by @cafekitsune !!

pinned post last edited - 01.04.24

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stranger-nightmare · 2 years

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how my writing is going atm

#the voice of a nightmare #writing struggles #angst writing #smut writing #joseph quinn #jamie campbell bower

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allthingswhumpyandangsty · 11 months

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put in the tag your favorite misunderstood blorbo

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stuismybf · 2 years

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loving him was never enough - h.c

summary: 001 pretends to be in love with you to get closer to your sister, eleven.

prompt: "did you really think I cared about you?"

a/n: don’t really like this either and i’m not sure if it’s because it’s bad or if it’s just because i hate literally everything i write!! :)

Your knees buckled onto the ground and you struggled to catch your breath. You looked up at the man standing in front of you and hot tears rolled down your cheeks.

A smile was on his face as he crouched down to your level, he shushed you, placing a finger to your lips.

It was too good to be true, you should’ve known. He was too perfect.

“why?” you sobbed, even though you knew the answer. He wanted your younger sister Eleven. He had used you to get to her, he’d pretended to be in love with you just so he could take her.

“did you really think i cared about you?” he asked, tilting his head to the side.

You didn’t answer, but you didn’t need to. The answer was obvious.

“you’re pathetic” he spat.

he stood up and you sat there on the floor watching his every move.

“how could i love you? there’s nothing special about you Y/n.”

you looked down at the ground trying to tune him out.

“the only thing special about you is your sister.”

one of your tears dropped onto the ground.

“i could never love you”

“save me the speech and just do it already” you said, your teary eyes stared up at him and you could see the anger on his face as he dropped down to your level.

He gripped your face in his hand and stared at you for a moment and then you felt your heart drop again. This was the man you’d fallen in love with, you’d spent everyday with him for the last few months, and you’d cherished every moment of it up until now as you sat on the floor in your bedroom and he wrapped his hands around your throat.

you didn’t know what what happen to Eleven and that was all you could think about as you clawed at his hands, fighting for air.

“don’t.” you whispered, struggling to get out the word.

“goodbye y/n” he said with a smirk.

as the light faded and your heartbeat slowed down the only thing you could think about was eleven, you hoped she would be okay.

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themoonsbride · 1 year

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Hi I just love your stories

Could I make a request with Jace

Reader is having a bad day from a terrible breakup.

She goes to the local cafe on the corner and happens to run into Jace.

He sits down next to her and buys her a cappuccino and asks her what's wrong

They get to know each other and eventually he asks her out of a date.

If you could fill in all the little details like him putting his arm around her and them looking into each other's eyes that would be wonderful

I read your stories and they make me feel happy and warm inside

You're a beautiful writer

Don't ever stop and follow your dreams You make the small part of the internet very happy

hi oh my gosh!!! i love you, literally made my entire week your so lovely. i hope you have the best day/night. <33

I'd love to write that for you. Sorry it took me so long to publish it!!

We Started as Strangers .

pairing; jace wayland x f!reader

Summary; Reader gets broken up with and feels horrible about herself, meets Jace inside of a local café, he ends up making small talk with her noticing she's upset, they end up flirting quite a bit and go out on their first date together.

Warnings; none, all fluff (some mild angst too.)

a/n: sorry I haven't been updating recently, I haven't had much motivation, I've been having a rough week and other things going on in my life have been stressful. I'll try to start updating more . :)

"Are you serious right now?!" You yelled at your now to be ex boyfriend inside the parking lot. There were nosy customers who'd been eavesdropping inside their cars and staring, people pushing their shopping carts to their cars and loading their trunks couldn't help themselves from staring. But you didn't care, infact that was the last of your worries due to your lover of almost 8 months was ending things with you. Sure 8 months couldn't compare to a relationship of 5 years, but it still broke you.

"Yeah Y/n, I am serious. Now get out of my sight." He replied coldly before hearing the sound of his car unlocking. Reality felt broken, like there was a wrinkle in time. Warm salt rivers streamed down your red cheeks.

"Fuck you!" you screamed and tore off the necklace that was clasped around your neck and threw it in his direction, hitting him in the jaw, making him flink and curse. He glared at you, his eyes cold and filled with anger.

"You're so fucking pathetic and childish. Goodbye Y/n." He stated sternly before getting inside his car. You felt rage overfill all the sadness inside your veins and core and kicked one of his back tires and stormed away. You felt lost. You felt broken. Tears blurred your vision and, your lungs stung from how furiously you were inhaling and exhaling.

You entered your car and rested your forehead ontop of the slim, leather, steering wheel and started to scream. Your throat feeling scratchy and soon hoarse. You started your car and started to drive to your favorite place in town, Java Jones. it was a nice café and sometimes people did live comedy and readings, you usually didn't go there for the open mic nights though.

Mainly just for their coffee and sweet treats.

You parked your car on next to the curb and walked a few blocks down, past a club and a few clothing stores before reaching the doubled glass doors of the small café. You looked around with your teary puffy eyes and found an empty booth and sat down. You stared outside watching the people walk past, and other strangers entering stores across the street. You looked down at your hands, your fingernails were bitten down to skin, it must've happened before your boyfriend ex broke up with you. You had that feeling deep inside your belly that you always got when something bad was bound to happen.

You were nervous and couldn't figure out what possible bad thing could've happened. Your mind presumed the idea it could've been your boyfriend breaking up with you. He was being so distant and you were sick of it and missed him, needed him. So what did you do instead of call his phone and talk it out? you followed him and confronted him.

Yeah great going, now you're single!

You hadn't even realized you were crying again until you noticed there were small pools of tears on the booth table. You looked up from your booth and saw other couples having cute dates, sharing milkshakes and small treats. It made you feel more broken and empty inside.

You looked out the window again, and saw in the reflection that a guy was approaching you, he was dressed in all black and had slick back blonde hair. he seemed young, maybe around his mid 20's ish.

"Excuse me?" He spoke. His accent had taken you back by suprise as you turned and tried to avoid eye contact, not wanting a complete stranger to see you crying. You must've looked an absolute mess infront of him. you felt embarrassed.

"Is this seat taken?" He asked softly, you shook your head no in response.

"No you can sit." You murmured back, and he sat across from you, he folded his hands in his lap as he noticed you were looking out the window, and saw your ruined mascara in your reflection along with your red puffy face.

"Is everything alright?" The sincerity was tracing inside his words and wrapping around you into a transparent hug. You looked over at him and wiped one of your tears off your cheek.

"No, I mean not really." You said meekly, you felt so small and empty. It felt weird opening up to someone you didn't know.

"Want to talk about it?" He said gently grabbing one of your hands and rubbing his thumb against the back of it soothingly. You looked down at the both of your hands and looked back up at him, his baby blue eyes seemed so welcoming.

You nodded at him and he gave you a tiny heartfelt smile as you breathed in deeply.

"My boyfriend just broke up with me." the word's fell off your tounge unexpectedly. it felt like they had all mixed and scrambled inside your throat before you spoke, but surprisingly, you were able to get full sentences out.

You ended up going on a whole rant about how you and your boyfriend broke up and how it made you feel, when you made eye contact with him once more. you realized you'd been going on and on. You also realized he was also holding both of your hands now.

"I'm so sorry Dear, surely he'll regret it, giving up someone who seems so amazing and brilliant." He said smiling at you, you felt your own lips start to stretch into a smile too.

"Why don't we get some coffee. yeah?" He seemed so nice and sweet. You didn't even know his name and now here he was, offering to get you guys coffee.

You lightly nodded your head before he get up from the booth and walked up to the counter, getting you a cappuccino and just regular black coffee for himself. He came back with his same soft smile plastered across his face before sitting across from you again. He lightly pushed your coffee over towards you as you smiled again, it almost felt like your cheeks were becoming warm, and you weren't sure if it was from the cappuccino, or from,,, shit.

his name.

"Uh.." you mumbled as he sipped his coffee, raising his brows at you.

"Sorry, do you not like cappuccinos?" He asked putting his cup back onto the table.

"No, it's not that it's just.. I don't know your name." you felt yourself grow shy inside.

he laughed at himself before placing his head in his hands, dragging them down his face before flashing you that amazing smile again.

"My apologies dear. Jace, Jace Wayland. but you could just call me Jace." He said grabbing one of your hands again, you swore you saw him wink at you at the end of his last sentence.

we're you guys flirting? was he flirting with you? he didn't even know your name, which you figured you should probably tell him by now too.

"Y/n." You said smirking .

"Y/n L/n, or you know. you could just call me Y/n." As the both of you giggled at your mocking of his words. looking into eachothers eyes intensely, it almost felt a bit intimate.

After about 4 months of knowing Jace, you'd completely forgotten your ex. You felt so different around Jace, the way he'd smile at you, how he'd hold your hand, how intense your butterflies were around him. You were too scared to make a move, you didn't know or really think he liked you too.

But there was a small part inside of you that desperately hoped he was just scared too, scared you didn't like him, because he liked you too.

You hoped so because he'd make you feel shy inside, and your body feel like it was going numb, or tingling whenever he'd look into your eyes, they looked like beautiful shining sapphires. How he'd make you feel like you were on top of the world when he made small flirty remarks towards you, and how your face would heat up just by looking at him from afar, and close up.

You were at Java Jones. Sitting in that same booth, that same day you met him. Waiting for Jace to arrive, and nearly almost 5 or 10 minutes later. there he was, entering the café and sitting down across from you. You smiled at him happily, he returned the same, though it seemed more nervous than he'd normally be.

"Hey Y/n?" He said shyly, trying trying avoid looking into your beautiful eyes and how gorgeous they'd look in the sunlight that beemed through the window.

"Yeah Jace?" You responded, grabbing his hands, trying to sooth his nerves, it was obvious to you that he felt anxious, maybe even a bit scared.

It made your heart start to race slightly, Jace was never scared, or anxious. He was always brave and kept his head held up high. It was one of the reasons you secretly loved him.

"I wanted to ask you something." His voice was sounded far and the type of anxious you'd feel piting inside of your stomach while you'd wait for your grade on a big test, or were checking your returned email from your dream collage to see if you either got in, or got denied.

You hummed in response, feeling like your arms were starting to tremble from how anxious you were becoming as a reaction to Jace being anxious for what seemed like the first time you'd ever met him.

"I wanted to know if.." He stopped himself mid sentence, you felt your breath hitch inside your throat.

"If, you'd like to go out. to dinner, tonight?" He murmured over to you, the words flowing into your ears, you weren't sure if you heard him correctly, or if you could hear anything at all. Your Heart felt like it was exploding into confetti along with the butterflies that were tickling the insides of your stomach and around your ribcage.

You examined his face to check if he were serious, and by his expression. He was, at first he thought your silence was your way of rejection, and he'd start to feel regret bubbling up inside of him until you smiled at him and your eyes had happiness glaze over them as you nodded your head.

"Yes, yes I'd love that Jace." You said, trying to keep calm and collected as he smiled back at you, he dragged your hands down the table as you both stood to leave the café, with his arm wrapped around your waist.

#jamie campbell bower #jace wayland x reader #jace wayland #jace herondale #the mortal instruments #city of bones #jamie bower fluff #angst #angst with a happy ending

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jennay · 1 year

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Misery

Request: reader struggles with depression and Jamie wants to help.

Master List

No one noticed you were falling apart until the pieces fell before them and caught fire. How were they supposed to see when the warning signs came with excuses and white lies?

You weren't proud that it took them this long to start catching on. You were disappointed that you'd become such a good liar.

The guilt ate at you every day, making you want to hide your aching heart from everyone. You could band-aid the pain with a smile and continue to laugh through the dread and worry.

You found yourself isolated and ignoring texts or phone calls. Every time Jamie tried to get ahold of you, you sent it to voicemail or blatantly ignored his text message, leaving the word read under his texts.

Jamie noticed the change in your behavior almost immediately. He sadly watched as his girlfriend lost her bright glow, and that spark he loved began to fade.

He received a call from your coworker and dear friend that you'd called off three days in a row, and both of them knew you rarely called off of work, even when you were sick.

The big red flag floated in his eyes. What were you doing? All that Jamie knew was that he needed to check on you even if you yelled through the door and told him to go home again.

Before Jamie decided to go to your house, he called your mom and met her for lunch. He expressed his worries, claiming he could help if you opened the door.

When your mom heard this, she became concerned; something was wrong if you weren't speaking to Jamie. Growing up, he was the only person you trusted. While Jamie was traveling, your mom would joke that you didn't talk for a month. She weakly smiles at Jamie and hands him her spare key to your apartment. "Let me know if I can help." She tells him.

Jamie pulls into the parking lot of your apartment. He feels excitement as he runs up the first flight of stairs.

Jamie saw you nearly every day until you slipped into this funk. You wouldn't explain to him what caused this mood because you weren't sure what caused it either.

Jamie knocks on the door, and though you hear the knock, you don't move from the nest you've made in your bed. You turn on your fan as loud as it will go and pull the blankets over your head. The blackout curtains on your windows made it nearly impossible for you to guess the time.

You snuggle into your comforter and pray whoever is at the door will leave. You weren't in any mood to socialize.

When he gets the door unlocked, he wants to race straight to you; but when he enters, he stands in shock. All of your belongings are packed in boxes.

Pictures that filled Your shelves were taken down, and floor rugs rolled up.

Jamie fears what kind of thoughts you're having; he's never seen you pull away quite like this, and if you did, you went to him for comfort, or you figured a solution.

Jamie quietly opens your bedroom door. He frowns, catching a glimpse of you under your blankets hidden in the dark, the same place he left you over a week ago.

"Oh, Love." He whispers.

He pulls out his cell phone and uses the light to guide him through the darkness. He sits on the side of your bed next to where you lay.

"Love." He rests his hand on your shoulder, and gently shakes you. “Baby wake up.”

Your eyes flutter open, and though it's impossible to see through the blackened room, you can sense that it's Jamie.

Sighing you sit up. "Jamie?"

He holds your hand, "Can I open the blinds?"

"How did you get in here? I locked the door.”

He leans over your body and pushes the drapes back, allowing a small amount of light to leak into the room. You squint your eyes; you can't remember the last time you opened them.

"Your mom gave me her key." His eyes scan your face; you look ill, tired, and unhappy.

"You talked to my mom? What is it that you think your doing?" You watch his eyebrow raise.

"I'm checking on my girlfriend. You haven't answered my calls or texts and ignore me whenever I ring the doorbell." His shoulders slump, and he stares at the ground. "What's going on with you? Why is everything packed up like your leaving?" He bites his lip, feeling confused and not fully knowing what to say. "Did I do something to upset you?"

You nervously chew the inside of your cheek. You didn't know how to explain what you were feeling. You only know it hurts a lot, and you don't want to be here anymore.

You hate the look on his face. The one that looks like he's been overthinking and beating himself up. "I need to know if I did something wrong so I can fix it."

You shake your head, "You didn't do anything."

"Then why are you avoiding me?" He cautiously asks.

"I don't know." You sit against the backboard of your bed. Your hands weakly fall into your lap when you shrug. "I feel bad, that's all I know, and I can't do this anymore."

He holds one of your hands and rubs his thumb up and down your wrist. "How can I help?"

"You can't." Your lips press together; you don't want to say anything else. You didn't want to tell him that you would sell your stuff and maybe disappear. "I don't want help." You quietly say.

Jamie stands, and you wonder what he's doing until he gestures for you to scoot over. He squeezes next to you and wraps his arm around your shoulder to pull you close to him. "You can't keep pushing me away. I won't let you." He moves your legs over his lap with his free arm and holds you like a small child. "I'll stay with you until we can figure this out." He leans to the side and grabs the remote for your TV.

You try to get angry and tell him to get out of your apartment, but you give in the moment your head falls to his chest. "I don't want to feel this way." Your eyes fill with salty tears, and you take a shaky breath. "It's not fun anymore. I don't want to do this." You admit.

Jamie feels his heart shatter into pieces. "Love," He wraps his arms tighter around you, almost afraid you will be gone if he lets go. "It's okay." He tries, "We need to get you to a doctor."

"No."

"Darling, your sick..." He kisses your temple. "It's nothing to be ashamed of. I'll be with you every second of it. Please." He begs.

"I'm scared." You pull your legs off his lap and turn on your side. "I, I don't...Jamie, I'm sorry. I feel awful, and I don't recognize myself. It would be better if I disappeared. I didn't want to hurt you. I tried to kill the pain."

"I know, Love."

He takes this opportunity to snuggle up to you, taking his place as the big spoon. He kisses your neck, "It's going to get better. I promise." He runs his fingertips up and down your arm in a gentle manner. "This world needs you; I need you... I want to grow old with you and take care of you." He quietly tells you.

Jamie would not lose you to depression; he'd almost lost himself to the battle and would not allow depression to take you. Not now, not ever.

Turning on your other side to face him, you curl into Jamie's body and bury your face in his chest. Eyes are slowly closing while Jamie plays with your hair. You feel safe and calm for the first time in months. Who knew the one you tried to push away greatly was the one you needed the most?

#jamie campbell bower #jamie bower #jamie campbell x reader #jamie fanfic #jamie bower x reader #jamie bower x you #jcbower #jamie bower x y/n #jamie campbell bower x you #jcb #jamie bower angst

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pumpkin-sage · 2 years

Text

Angsty fics with a good ending >>>

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bebx · 7 months

Text

absolutely live for that moment where the villain in a piece of media realizes they’re doomed and then they reflexively show that genuine fear in their eyes, but only just for a split second before that clear evidence of fear is gone and the hatred and the anger are back and then they’re snarling at the hero again. but that fear, that lasted for only a second, is enough to let the audience know that the villain is in fact not a “soulless monster” or a “killing machine” but a human who’s been hurt and is scared, in some way they’re like a caged animal in the sense that they’re dangerous but also wounded and utterly terrified with their back against the wall.

I will forever have mad respect for the actor who portrays them and is able to deliver that raw emotion on screen. like this right here is an oscar worthy performance holy fcking shit.

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agirlwholovesrockstars · 3 months

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𝖄𝖔𝖚 𝖒𝖆𝖐𝖊 𝖒𝖊 𝖋𝖊𝖊𝖑 𝖇𝖗𝖆𝖓𝖉 𝖓𝖊𝖜

𝓒𝓱𝓪𝓹𝓽𝓮𝓻 𝓣𝓱𝓻𝓮𝓮

"𝘛𝘢𝘶𝘨𝘩𝘵 𝘮𝘦 𝘩𝘰𝘸 𝘵𝘰 𝘭𝘪𝘷𝘦 𝘢𝘨𝘢𝘪𝘯"

彡 𝓼𝓮𝓻𝓲𝓮𝓼 𝓶𝓪𝓼𝓽𝓮𝓻𝓵𝓲𝓼𝓽 彡

✦ 𝚙𝚛𝚎𝚟𝚒𝚘𝚞𝚜 𝚌𝚑𝚊𝚙𝚝𝚎𝚛 | 𝚗𝚎𝚡𝚝 𝚌𝚑𝚊𝚙𝚝𝚎𝚛 ✦

𝕾𝖚𝖒𝖒𝖆𝖗𝖞 : locked away from freedom yet again, you've come too far, you wouldn't let your guard down, won't lose hope because of one good reason

𝖂𝖔𝖗𝖉 𝕮𝖔𝖚𝖓𝖙 : light and straight to the point, I promise

𝖂𝖆𝖗𝖓𝖎𝖓𝖌𝖘 : 18+ Knight!Eddie Munson x Princess!FEM!reader, language, reader and Eddie are both (21), Henry is (30+), Jason (my apologies), use of y/n, age gap, manipulation, arrange marriage, Jason is so eager to make reader give up- so, beware of how I made him so toxic in this, harassment, rumors, town gossip, denial, reader having trust issues

𝖂𝖍𝖆𝖙 𝖙𝖔 𝕰𝖝𝖕𝖊𝖈𝖙 : the awaiting fluff will come over soon, the first chapters will be a lot of ANGST! , the story is set in 17th century, upside down exists in this series, dark fantasy, romance, drama, action, slight Wayne reoccurring, if you squint 🤫

𝕹𝖔𝖙𝖊 𝕿𝖔 𝕽𝖊𝖆𝖉𝖊𝖗 : the frequent likes and the reblogs, keep em' coming because I'm literally so stoked to see y'all loving it! even though I'm still shy and couldn't believe that this little series of mine will be seen! 🥺🫶🏻

𝕬𝖚𝖙𝖍𝖔𝖗 𝕹𝖔𝖙𝖊 : I'm honestly itching to literally jump to the big revelation of Eddie's character in this, just wait til' see you guys- good things comes to those who wait ;))

☆ EDDIE MUNSON'S MASTERLIST ☆

❣ AGATHA'S MAIN PAGE ❣

You woke up in your bedroom

Haunted

Haunted, by the fact that you came back here again, the place you once you called home

Now, the place, upside down, the one that many people say it's a horrific world

It is given that it's indeed scary to live there, you wanted to go back because you felt much more safer there

The duality of being in here, in your palace, where it's normal, you know it in yourself that you will always choose, the unusual place

The upside down

You're are now dreading to go outside with Henry and Jason

"You only lived there for a month, Y/N"

Jason's voice echoes into your mind, he told that to you while removing the bind from your wrist

You don't care

You really don't give a shit that he's talking about

You never felt more secured since your father disappearance when you're with Eddie

In all of your 20 years of life, funny, you've almost forgotten your birthday today

It's just not the same anymore

You loved your home, you really do

But ever since that night, it changed everything

Every corner, every room, every inch of your place is now tarnished and tainted by the creeps that is now roaming all over your home

"Miss?"

A knock from your door, taken you back into the reality

You begrudgingly sighed as you sit up

"You may enter"

"Morning, your grace" your maid arrives with a tray of breakfast

You eat up as you already planning to escape again

You've noticed that your maid hasn't left your chambers yet

You knit your brows together as you watch her hesitant to speak out loud

"Can I say something?"

"Go on"

She looks over at your door before she spoke up, she leans closer as she whispers

"I know- the king, your father has already warned you about people like them but he is right, your excellency"

You chew slowly as you listen

"I don't know, if you'll believe me but I saw Henry, he has the ability to lift things with his hands"

You blinked "I'm sorry? What?"

she struggles to explain as she stutters "I-I think, Henry has powers"

The last words that she told you, it's like only for you to hear as she speaks it so low

You stare at her as you try to rethink all of the interactions that you had with him before

"Don't worry, I believe you, thank you for telling me"

"Your most welcome-"

"Y/N, morning"

as if on cue, speak of the devil, Henry came inside your room unannounced, you covered yourself with blanket, conscious about his actions

"Is she troubling you?"

You and the maid looked at each other as you think for a better valid reason that'll work

"The eggs are a bit runny, I'm just explaining her how to cook it the way that I like"

You gave her the tray as she took it and leaves the room

"Don't you have any manners, Henry?" You cleared your throat

The way he looks at you, you can't really tell if he's being genuine or not

You don't see that when you look at Eddie

"Oh, pardon, my intrusion, princess- I just wanted to see you how you're doing"

You wrap your arms around yourself hoping that he'll take the hint that you're shielding yourself

Your white nightgown is so thin and see-through, you glanced at your vanity, there's your robe draping in the rim of your chair, god- you wished you've worn it, the only decent that's covering you it's your blanket but you can't help but feel naked in front of him

"I'm fine, thank you for asking" you briefly look at him straight in the eyes

"Accept my apologies on the behalf of Jason, I know he's taken you too far from any inconveniences, he can be so arse about his duties but he's a strong soldier and I trust him"

You tried your best not to roll your eyes at his utterance

He's a fucking asshole, alright- that's all he is

You lick your lips as you try to muster up "You have my forgiveness, but Henry, next time, you'll knock before you enter my room" your face expression has that strict look

He nods as he humbled down towards your tone

Your maid came back with your breakfast tray, Henry has still have something more to say but decides against it

"I'll leave you to it" Henry tug up a small smile to you as you nod at him

Why don't you bring the smile back at him?

Once he shuts the door behind him

You fall back onto your bed as you say while you look at the ceiling

"I am conflicted whether he is being honest or not, his aura is so questionable to me"

"Your highness, your food might get cold-"

"To you what can you say about him?" You raise yourself back up to your position before as you ask your maid

"Uh- he's plucky"

You snorted "Right on, I can agree with that"

"How can we passed the guards?" Gareth says as he carries his things

"People can recognize us!" Jeff puts on a scarf over his neck

"So, let's disguise then" Eddie covers himself a cloak with a hood and he gave the others the same thing

"Oh, isn't that just so easy to hide! I know you care for the girl but are you sure this is going to work?" Gareth sarcastically smiles as he reasons with Eddie

"Not that only he cares for her but also he loves her" Jeff shoots a wink at Eddie as he puts on the cloak

"I am going to skin you both alive" Eddie who is annoyed while the two starts snickering and an amused Enzo approaching them

"What's this that I hear? Now, I get it why she pulled that act for you"

"That was nothing- it's just these two are getting on my nerves" Eddie scoffs as he clutches his sword and went out first in the portal

"Oh my fucking great" Gareth frustratedly throw his hand up

"What is it?" Jeff questions him as he watches his friend stressed out

Gareth points to your castle that is literally miles away ahead from them

"Do you think we can still get there alive?" He looks over at Eddie who is squeezing his eyes, restraining every part inside of him not to annihilate- he is still annoyed at the thought that he might have feelings for you

"You gotta have a lot of faith, Gareth" Eddie told him as his friend rolls his eyes at him

"Good thing, there aren't people around to see us" Enzo looks around the woods that leads to town

"Let's get going" Eddie nods as all of them start walking

It's weird to wear your gowns

It's weird to walk around the halls of your home with your heels clicking

It's weird to have someone help you to get ready, you don't want this and you don't need this

You want to get out of here

You want to be with someone who can fix this whole madness

You're headed towards at the library that way you could avoid talking to them

But, the moment you turn on the other side, Henry is there

Shit

Before you could turn your heel around, he spoke your name as you shut your eyes as you sighed, you look back at him

He straightens himself up as he looks at you

From your face and your whole get up

"You look ravishing, Y/N"

You really don't wanna talk to him

"Uh- thank you, I should be going-"

"Please- don't" he took your hand in his as you look down at it and back at him

He saw your untrusting expression that is targeted at him, he quickly rips his hands from you

"I know we get off in the wrong foot, but, can we please- let's just start over?"

You want to believe him

You really do

But, something else is holding you back to get close to him

You cannot read to what he meant behind those eyes

Why do you get the feeling that he is hiding something?

Is he really being truthful to you?

"I-I don't know, Henry"

"But we could start slow- that's fine by me"

You shift in your stance as you finally look at him

His eyes are longing for you?

"How could I know that you're not tricking me?"

"I am not, Y/N, I just wanted you to know that I'm here for you"

"Can you give me some time to think about it?"

"Of course" his smile is hopeful and somehow you're still taking precautions to his actions

But, your words are promising to him

That's progress

"Oh- what a fucking picturesque that you're both going on, hmm?" A slurring Jason appeared before you

You rolled your eyes at his drunken state

"Let's not, Jason" Henry narrows his eyes at him as he shielded you away from him

"Did you asked her about the marriage?"

Your soft eyes went aflame as you glare at Henry

"No- it's not what you think, Y/N!" Henry grumbles as he looks at Jason

"Don't you see it? Y/N? He likes you!" Jason chuckles as he tries to balance himself

"Go to fucking hell, Jason" You spat as you leave them both together but before you could do that he blocks your path

"Now- don't you dare walk out of me!" He grabs your wrists as he hold you tightly

"Let me go! Jason!" You grimaced at his alcoholic breath as you tried to take off the grip that he has on you

"Jason- get your hands off with her!" Henry had enough of him as he hold him back off with you

Jason wouldn't let go as Henry fumed at him

He had no choice but to....

A sudden force that made he him move away from you as your eyes widened, knocking off Jason at the wall as he drops to the floor

Your maid earlier told you about this

But, seeing this in action made you feel shocked even you already knew

You're petrified as you blink rapidly as you watch Henry wiped off the blood from his nose with the back of his hand

You take a step backwards but Henry felt you moving away from him

"No- no- no" He moves closer to hold both of your forearms

As you start shaking in fear, you flinched at his cold touch

"Please, don't be afraid"

You tried to speak but you couldn't as you start to sob quietly

"I wouldn't let anyone hurt you, Y/N- I would never hurt you" he starts to cradle your cheek as you watch his movements

"This is what I fear of you, you being scared of me"

You let the ghostly tears fall as he uses his thumb to remove it, you try to gain back your composure

"Henry, please, I need a moment to breathe"

He blinks as he nods at you as he gives you some space

You look at Henry and then back at Jason who is unconscious

This is a lot to take in as you breathe out

"Can I be excused?"

"Yes, you can, Y/N"

You muttered a quiet thank you as you directed yourself towards your chambers

You cupped your mouth as you try to replay of what just happened, Henry watches you go with a look of worry on his eyes

As much as you wanted to handle this on your own

You can't help but to need someone beside you

You want him and you need him

You need Eddie

The four men, rest and build a camp as Eddie always

Always looking at your castle from afar

The journey that they're taking, they're in the middle of it, he's almost there

"You know she won't appear if you look at it more often, right?" Gareth swirls the ladle on the pot that he's cooking soup for dinner

He scoffs as he sits on the rock with arms crossed

"I'm just worried for her, man" Eddie deeply sighs

"Jason is such a dick, I swear" Gareth brings up the interaction that happened before

"But we haven't met Henry yet, we have no idea who he is, maybe he is not awful like him" Jeff suggests

"That young man has taken over her financial services" Enzo recalls as he cleans his weapons

"I take back what I said, they're both assholes" Jeff shakes his head to Enzo's remark

"Here, you have to eat- I know she'll be fine" he hands him a bowl of soup

"I know that she can but I just wished that I was there with her through all of it"

Gareth smiles at him

Eddie is confused at it as he starts to slurp the broth at the edges of the rim of his bowl

He swallows "What?"

"Nothing, I just- you always seem so serious and now it looks like because of her you had the another reason to live"

He tug up a smile as he says "As much you're a pain in the ass, but, yeah she is"

"You both know we could hear to what you're both talking about, right?" Jeff speaks as he pours himself another bowl

Enzo chuckles as he drinks from his cup

"Stop ruining the moment, man!" Gareth yells out to him as all of them shared a laugh

The firepit smoked off as the sunrise shines through out the area

"She's getting married!"

"To whom?"

"Henry!"

"Isn't he like too old for the poor girl?"

Eddie registered the sounds of the townspeople that is too close for him to hear

Good thing, there's a bunch of bushes around their camp

He sits up as he listens at them

"When did you hear it?"

"Just today, I think they're preparing the wedding soon enough"

Eddie buried his face with the palm of his hands as he runs his fingers through his hair

He looked at his companions, who are still asleep as he breathes deeply

Why would he feel disappointed?

He mustn't feel this way since

You're not even his

Maybe, your kindness and sweet demeanor towards him, he misinterpreted it

That's where it dawned on him, it hit him like a ton of bricks, his heart dropped when he finally comes to the realization

He loves you

He feels that he is running out of time, it's like he is trying to reach you but now he can't help but to feel that you're slowly slipping out of his touch

He remembers what you told to Jeff that you're about to married to him, but you didn't want to, you clearly told all of them that you don't want to be a part of it

But, you still don't want it until now? right?

No, he will not let the other people get into him, it mustn't be true

He let them get into his head and his thoughts

He will come and get you

He stood up and wakes Gareth

Gareth groaned as he uses his arms to propped himself up "Wha- What is it?"

"We're losing her, let's go"

Henry is startled by your presence, his face falls when he saw you so upset, watching you very closely with concern as he follows you behind your back

Enraged by the news, you entered the main room as you pushed the doors wide open with anger rushing through your veins

"Jason, I have the bone to pick with you, what was that about?!?"

If doesn't that make you feel mad even more, he is sitting in your father's chair

"I have absolutely no idea what you're talking about, princess" he acts like he didn't do anything

God- you want to scratch his smug face off

"Oh, I know you're the main reason why everybody talks about it"

"About what?"

"You're the one who fucking spread it!"

Henry who is unaware of it all, he looks at you and to Jason who just shrugs at him

When Jason didn't gave you answers and that adds more to the fuel that you're having right now

You feel so freaking on fire that you could explode, you turn to Henry still having that frown on your face

"Are you on this? Did you have something to do with it?"

"Wha- What?! No- I don't even know what you're implying to"

"Your most trusted fucking dipshit soldier, he told everyone that we agreed on the arrangement which we're clearly not!"

The last lines you shout it out to Jason who is so smugly couldn't careless to what you're dealing with

Henry facepalmed as he says "Jason, what the hell?!?"

You lift your gown as you exit the room, you want to scream

"Is the only way to get her controlled!"

"Controlled?!? Do you have any idea to what you just started?!?

He scoffs "This isn't supposed to be big deal anymore, they already knew all about it and I just confirmed it"

"She is not ready! Let's give her some time"

"There is no time!"

Henry put his fingers on the bridge of his nose, he looked back seeing you aren't being there anymore

That's what he thought

You're hiding behind closed doors, listening to their argument

He exasperatingly sighs as he begins "I cared for her and because of you she can't even trust me completely because I'm with you!" He points at himself

"You thought me being drunk last night- I wouldn't know to what you just did to me? Okay, fine let's see she'll grow on you like you told me before" Jason pushes his chair back and stood up as he walks towards to Henry

"How did she handle it when she finds out that you had powers?"

You tensed as the memory flashes back at you

Henry sighs in defeat as he couldn't fire back at him

He chuckles "See? That's what I thought"

"It- It wouldn't change anything" Henry still believes that you can

He knows that someday you'll believe him

You couldn't bear to hear more of it so you walk away

"It wouldn't be the same once the truth is out"

Henry leaves him as he shuts the doors angrily

"We have to get inside here" Enzo opens the door that leads the way towards the dungeon

"Seriously, man? The dungeon?" Gareth roams his eyes over the prisoner's cells

"It's the only easy way to get inside" Enzo whispers as he ducks his down at the passing royal guards

"He knows what he was doing, let's just get on with it" Eddie told them as they went all in

It's nail-biting to get caught, but they managed to get further more

When the four of them passed the other prisoners

There's someone in particular that caught his attention

He looks more closely as he looked at the elder man who is asleep

Why do he felt that his heart is telling that he knew this man

He heard the clicks of heels that says someone is coming

He hides himself quickly, he looks over that his friends already far left ahead of him

He's about to leave until....

He heard your voice

You mentioned a name

The voice that he missed so much

He wants to hear it all the time

The tendency is very strong to make him self appear right then and there, if you could only see his eyes twinkle

He took a step but someone else is with you

"Y/N, what are you doing here?"

You came for him because you had no one else to lean on

"I was- just checking if anyone is doing their job"

He hummed "That's my job, princess, leave that to me"

Wayne stirred from his sleep as his eyes adjusts at the figure before him

His eyes sparked that he saw you in there, but you can't do anything to talk to him

Because of him, Henry

You glanced at Wayne who is directly looking at you

"Sire, there's a witness that someone came out of the portal"

You placed your hand over your mouth trying to be subtle not to react at the report that the guard just told Henry

Eddie went out? To look for you?

"What?"

Henry take a one last look at you "Duty calls, you sure you'll be fine by yourself here?"

"I will be so glad if you're not snooping around me so much" you think to yourself

"Yes, I'll be good"

Henry nods as he leaves by the door

You sigh as you kneeled down in front of the bars that Wayne's caged in

"Wayne, I'm sorry, I didn't knew that you're here- I wasn't aware that you've been here all along"

You can tell from his eyes, he is like candle that's melting- he's tired

"it's alright, Y/N, you don't have to feel sorry for me"

You turn your back and you saw the key that laying on the table "I have you to get out of here"

You inserted the key but he stopped you to unlock it

"Y/N, I'll survive but you have to leave"

"I can't just leave you here again, no- please there's so many things that I have to tell you!"

"What is it that you're trying to tell me?"

"It's Ed-"

Wayne placed a finger in the middle of his lips as he shushes you

You overheard Jason and one of his guards coming closer

"Where is she?"

"I think she's in the dungeon, sire"

"You let her in there?!? She must've been talking to-" Jason grunts as he quickly picks up his feet to get on to the other room

You hide yourself on the other side, you almost shrieked at the hooded figure next to you, so, you ran away from it- too freaked out at the person that you bumped

You almost saw him

You almost reunited

You almost met the eyes of the person that you're trying to get back to

Eddie could've stopped you but before he can do it, you already scurrying away from him

He followed you to where you went but he couldn't find you

"Eddie! Where have you been?" Gareth pulled him back in the corner to where no one can see them

"it's Y/N- she scurried away because it was dark inside she didn't even realized it was me"

"You saw her?" Jeff gasps as he looked over at the halls for you

Enzo sighs as he rests his back at the wall

"I-I heard him"

"Who?"

"Henry"

"Did you saw his face?"

"Not clearly, but you we're right he wasn't like Jason but Y/N is so wary of him"

"What else?"

"She was talking to someone, someone she called Wayne-"

"Wayne? Wayne is still alive?" Enzo held him by the shoulders, the three young men are astounded to his sudden action

"Yes, he is locked up in there" Eddie uses his thumb directing at the dungeon

"You'll look for Y/N, I'll handle Wayne" Enzo implies as he headed at the dungeon

"Let's go, boys" Eddie nods

You closed the door behind locked it as you catching up with your breath as you pant from running

You eyes land on the documents that are scattered all over your father's desk

You walked forward picked up the papers, you feel sick to your stomach

Jason, he forged a marriage document of you and Henry

Much to your dismay and out of anger, you crumpled the paper that you're holding, you throw the rest of the papers and push everything out of the desk, you screamed harder as you fell down on to knees

You breakdown and cry for the first time, you really don't want to be like this

But, you can't help but to release everything that is killing inside of you

You're too enervated by all of this

You went out of the room, you have to confront him once and for all

"Look!" Jeff points at you as they hide

"It's Y/N!" Gareth whisper-shouts

"She looks-" Jeff frowns at the look of your face

"Distraught" Eddie is disturbed by your state

Wrath and Despair are nestled in your enchanting face as you stomping around as you look for someone

If things aren't like this, he would've worshipped you of how beautiful you look

"Let's follow her" Eddie says as they tailed behind you

"Jason!"

"Hmm?"

"You better explain yourself!" you held up the now crumpled contract in front of him

"What- what the hell did you do to it?" He snatched the paper away from your hands as you scoffed

"What did I do? You should be punished for your crimes, Jason!"

"Why are you so stubborn? I am saving you from your debt!"

"You clearly missing the point here- don't change the fucking subject, I don't want any marriage!"

"You don't have anybody anymore, princess, you have no choice just face it"

"Whatever it is that you're trying to do, I will deny it!"

"Is it because of that boy isn't it?"

Jeff and Gareth looked at Eddie who is fiery watching you ranting with Jason

Don't crack

Don't let him see through you

"He has nothing to do with this-"

"You're so foolish, Y/N"

"No, I am not-" you're seething and you start seeing red as you move closer to him

He wanted to say something to make you even more furious as you didn't let him cut you off this time

"He held my life within his hands, Jason, you don't know anything what you just done to me- he created everything I am"

Eddie's eyes softens at your words, he tilted his head at you

You care for him as much as he cares for you?

You tear the fake marriage contract in front him into pieces as he watches in horror

You leave him at that as he throw words at you and you didn't even care to what he was saying

As you continue to walk, the same hooded man earlier hold you by the arms and pinned your back on the wall as you protest

"Quiet down, it's me"

You calmed as you heard the familiar voice

The man before you, he takes off his hood as his eyes yearns for you

The words caught up in your throat, you feel lighter as a feather as you take him in

Your eyes are rimmed with flooding tears

"Eddie?"

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