#learn to live vicariously through your friends happiness

[einsteinbrosofficial]

some of y’all think suffering is a competition and it shows

[a-small-writer-in-a-big-world]

Hello hello! Got another request if you don’t mind! How would the 141 react to the femmilitary reader having a big family? Like she has a mum and dad, aunts and uncles and lots of cousins, and their all wholesome. Like the ultimate wholesome family?

Thank you ! 🏡👨‍👩‍👧👨‍👩‍👦‍👦👩‍👦👨‍👩‍👧‍👦

As someone who comes from a big family, this is something I can easily write about lol

Also sorry this took me forever ❤️

How Do They React to Reader who has a big family

Price

When he first found out about your big family it was bittersweet

On one hand, he liked that you had a family you could rely on when you went home. He knows that a lot of the people he works with don't and that having a support system that you can fall back onto is great

On the other hand, it meant that if anything happened to you, there would be a lot of heartbreak

He makes it his mission that you return safely for this reason

He probably ask about all of them, how your nieces/nephews are doing in school, how your siblings are, what your parents are doing. He's curious

If you show him pictures he'll be happy to see them

Won't be nervous to meet your family, he knows so much about them that he has so much to talk about

Would probably help whoever is grilling if it's a cookout

If there are any nieces/nephews who are kids they're going to love him so much he's going to be stolen away by them but he doesn't mind

He's actually really good with kids and will be the best person to tire them out for the parents

Shares obscure stories with your parents, uncles and aunts

He fits in really well with your family and when the visit is over you'll probably gets texts telling you to bring him around again

Ghost

He honestly finds it hard to understand how someone can have that big of a family but he's not that intimated by it

Much like Price, he becomes a lot more aware of your safety and takes extra precautions to make sure that you make it back to base with minimal or no life threatening injuries

Won't really ask about them unless you mentioned something about them offhandedly, then he'll want you to elaborate

He does like when you show him pictures though since he likes putting a face to the names you give him

He'll be a little nervous about meeting your family, being the natural introvert he is and what he would have to do about wearing a mask in front of everyone, even when you assured him that no one would make fun of him

He will probably try to stay in the less traffic/popular areas, though it's a little difficult with that many people

He will make small talk with anyone who tries to talk to him though, he's not rude, he's just a little bit overwhelmed

Eventually he will warm up and that when your nieces/nephews strike

They'll have him do anything and everything, parading him around as their pack mule for toys and showing him around the house. He's not going to question it at all, he's going to do what they tell him to.

Ends up getting a little sad because he gets reminded of his own family, but holds out until the event is over

Will get emotional if you tell him your family likes having him around and wants him to come back, but it'll take him a while to feel accepted just due to his own distance he puts between your family and him

Soap

Oh this guy is so happy to know you have a big family

He wants to everything about them and even friends a bunch of them on Facebook because he's nosy and likes to be in the know of what's going on in your life and your families

Will never stop asking about them. He's so excited to learn about what's going on and if you don't know he will most definitely found out by sleuthing through social media for it

Love seeing pictures. Please show him pictures

Lowkey accidental lives vicariously through you since he rarely ever sees his family or hears from them so getting to know all about them makes him feel a lot less lonely

Not nervous to meet your family, in fact he shows up like he's known them his entire life and your family greets him the same way

Gets along with everybody, he's got this charm to him that just wins people over

Jokes a lot with the adults and never fails to have stories to tell them that make them laugh. When he starts talking they all listen because they want to know what he's going to say but he's also just loud

Gets really into the family games

Price may tire the kids out but Soap puts them to bed with how much energy he's able to get out of them. He's really proud about it

Your family definitely wants him around and he might even visit them when you're not there. He's just that comfortable

Gaz

Ever heard of the phrase "Parents love him"? Yeah that's him

Was honestly surprised to learn you came from a huge family but is super curious about them nonetheless

He gives me only child vibes idk why so he's always willing to listen to how the family dynamics are within yours

Will ask about them a moderate amount and genuinely listens when you tell him what's going on

Probably friends a few of them on Facebook too

Likes pictures, thinks it's really sweet when he sees them

Nervous to meet your family but once they greet him with open arms all of it goes away and he feels right at home with them

Becomes the one that will do anything that needs to be done

Food needs to be moved? You got it. Things need to be carried? You don't have to ask him twice. Need help setting up tables? He's already doing it.

Talks with everyone but mostly connects with your cousins since they're most likely similar in age. He even manages to get some juicy gossip from them because he can be persuasive

The kids like to use him much like Ghost but they force him to actually play games and toys with them

He's happy to know that your family wants him back while your family wants you to marry him as quick as you can since he's so sweet

Hope you like! Sorry again for how long it took me to get to it.

[strayrockette]

Gentle Angel (Tommy Shelby x M!reader)

Summary: Tommy comforts reader when they realize they had been obvious in their interest in him.

Inspired by: Leith Ross's "We'll Never Have Sex"

Requested: Yes by 🐇

A/N: The reader is male and is on the ace spectrum.

Additional Note: If you ever feel unvalidated remember that you are! You may not fit into the "norm" of society but normal is subjective and is different for everyone. Your normal is validated and you have every right to be comfortable in it!

Additional Note 2: Just to clarify this does not in no way apply to pedos or to people who intentionally harm others for their pleasure.

Thomas Shelby Masterlist

Peaky Blinders Masterlist

There had been many lovers in his life. Not many had bothered to stay for long. His friends liked to joke that he went through women faster than he had a pack of cigarettes. And that was saying something. He couldn’t explain why it was so hard. Why it was he felt uncomfortable and anxious when it came to intimacy with women? Why the thought of sex itself left his stomach queasy? When he was young and naive he sought to ask his father. When he did his father laughed and said, “don’t think ‘bout it too much, it’s just sex.” He’d remember the scent of ash and wood that lingered on his father's hands. The way his eyes scrunched up as he hollered a laugh, and the way his mother had laughed along and told him that all he needed to do was satisfy his lovers. They said it was easy. Something he would learn as he gained experience. But it wasn’t easy. A fact he faced every time he was stuck in a bedroom with a decently attractive woman that would make any man weak to the knees. But not him. Never him. 

His friends, all blundering idiots but good folk nonetheless, would pat him on his back every time he spoke of his latest conquest. They jeered and cheered and celebrated all night long, living vicariously through him. They’d often complain about his good looks. How he would steal all the pretty girls. Not that he tried to. He really wasn’t trying. But it was normal and he was weird. 

All those nights, spent with his heart aching and eyes watering, a single mantra ringing in his head, “what’s wrong with me?” 

“What’s wrong with you” She’d asked with glazed eyes. Her chest heaved as and her shoulders tightened, “After everything, I’ve done for you. You still don’t want to have sex with me?” 

His palms dug into his pocket, sweaty and shaky. His eyes glanced over the room, soft-scented candles, and a gramophone playing lowly in the background. Jess was the longest he’d ever been with a woman and the only one who was willing to be patient with him. Until now, I guess 8 months is her limit, he thought wryly. 

He had come home late from work, a load of paperwork had been dumped on him at the shipping dock and he was the only one who was willing to stay overtime to sort through them. During that time Jess had made his favorite, baked pork with roasted vegetables and mashed potatoes. His mouth had watered as soon as he walked through the door and he had felt happy to have someone like her waiting for him at home. But he was beginning to realize that his happiness was her misery. 

“Do you even care about me?” She asked her eyes furiously searching his.

“Yes o-” He’d tried to tell her that yes he did care for her. How could he not? She was the best. She could hold a conversation with him that didn’t immediately stray to sex or intimacy. She was interested in his hobbies, she laughed at his jokes and she was pretty funny too. He liked listening to her gossip about her shitty clients who paid well and enjoyed their time together. He thought they were having a great time. Because the last 8 months of their time together had been the most fun he has ever had. She was his best friend. 

Oh, right. His thoughts came to a screeching halt. Best friend. But not a lover. 

Once again, he found himself unable to exact the duties of a loyal and adoring boyfriend with a sex drive to please his women. His face fell at the realization. 

He watched dejectedly as she gathered her things. She had asked if he cared and he did. But he was certain she didn’t mean as a friend. And that’s all she would ever be for him. 

There had to be something wrong with him. Because everyone seemed to be following a guideline for life and cruising by. While he struggled endlessly to even understand why he was such a terrible partner. Was he incapable of love? 

He thought so. 

Until he met him. 

His blue eyes were the first thing he had noticed. Striking and intense. He was meant to be leading the meeting with one Thomas Shelby about a possible deal between Shelby co. limited and Brandys Shipping doc. But he found himself stumbling and far too nervous to even utter a sentence. Strange, he had thought. 

“Hello, Mr. Shelby, I am Brandy's Shipping doc, manager for y/n l/n.” His hand had reached out for a handshake but had swiped the documents off of his desk. He cursed quietly. Or maybe not quietly enough. If the snickers of the men by Mr. Shelby’s side were an indicator. 

His heart sunk and he knew he had messed up a great deal. There’s no way they’ll follow through now, he cried inside his head. The meeting had barely started and he had already fucked everything up. That's a new record. 

The second thing he noticed was the deep and slow cadence of Thomas Shelby's voice. And he wondered if it was possible to fall in love with a voice. 

“Manager, eh.” He had leaned down to help pick up the papers, “What happened to the director?” 

y/n had to calm himself before replying. His hands busied themselves by sorting through the papers and putting them back in their respective places, “Mr. Brandy is currently overseas and has made me responsible for this business opportunity.” 

His voice remained even and calm unlike his erratic heartbeat. Thomas nodded before motioning to the men at his side. He had introduced them as his brothers and his right-hand men. 

The meeting went smoothly after his blunder. A fact he was surprised about. Mr. Shelby’s brothers may have laughed but the look Thomas had given them had effectively shut them up. Something he would be grateful for because he would do just fine being critical of himself. He didn’t need someone else to remind him. 

It had taken months to settle the deal. Turns out there was a lot of paperwork and meetings to go over. He was beginning to think that Mr. Brandy had purposely left to leave all the hard work to him. Y/n was sure of it but wasn’t at all displeased. Because he liked being around Thomas Shelby.

He wasn’t sure why, but there was something about Thomas Shelby that left him anticipating their next meet-up. 

Y/n had spent all day stuck in his office at Shelby co. limited. Thomas Shelby had made sure to provide necessary accommodation while he settled some loose ends to finish the deal between his company and Brandy Shipping doc. 

The window of his office overviewed greenery not available at his London office. Hues of pink and orange rose from the horizon. His eyes begged for rest but his body refused to move away from the view. The trees swayed lightly and glinted as rays of sunshine kissed its dewy surface. Glistening beautifully. 

“D’you not have sunrise back in London?” His voice broke the silence. Y/n lips quirked slightly behind his drink. The cool glass barely grazed his bottom lip before he pulled it away and motioned to the window, “Not like this,” he rasped. 

He could hear his footsteps getting closer, stopping briefly by the minibar. The clank of ice and glass echoed in their moment of silence. 

Thomas stood next to him, his shoulder brushing against his. “Peaceful, isn’t it?” 

He hummed before lifting his drink and allowing it to burn his throat. “Could use some of this back in London.” 

During his stay with the Shelby, he had found himself settling into a routine that consisted of working and having fun at the Garrison or at either one of Shelby’s homes for dinner. The more he got to know them the more at peace he began to feel. 

His previous meeting with Arthur and John had been forgotten and it didn’t hurt him as much when he realized they were just two idiots that found a certain joy in life. Immature and serious in their own way. Ada had been a riot to get to know. Her disdain for her brother's business style was always evident but her loyalty prevailed. Her quick wit and tenacious temper rivaled her brothers. She was quickly becoming one of his favorite Shelby to interact with. 

He turned his head to glance at Thomas. His eyes followed the lines of his sharp jaw and cheekbones. Noticing that the sun had risen just enough to caress Thomas’ skin. His heart raced and he couldn’t help but stare shamelessly as Thomas’ lips met his glass. 

“Is the view nice,” the glass lifted and his lips settled into a teasing smile. Soft and plump, which is hardly unfair. No man should have such soft and plump lips.

His brain raced to process the question but failed as he stuttered to find a proper response, “I-what?” 

Thomas turned, his blue eyes shining brightly with mirth, “You’ve been staring, was wondering if the view was nice.” 

His eyes moved over y/n face and he smirked, “It must be, you're doing that thing again.” 

He said the last part to himself but y/n had heard it loud and clear, “what thing?” 

His hands gripped the glass cup and he hoped it wouldn’t slip out of his increasingly clammy hands. His Adam's apple bobbed as he swallowed thickly. Was he being weird again? His stomach dropped as the thought crossed his mind. 

Rough hands grabbed his pulling the glass out of his grip and then sliding to his forearms where they began to softly massage them. 

His eyes focused intensely on Thomas’ eyes, searching for disgust or annoyance at his abnormalness. But instead found reassurance. Strange, he thought once more. 

“You tilt your head when you like something, you do it so often when you’re around me, it's hard not to notice,” Thomas uttered softly. 

Y/n righted himself, suddenly realizing that he was in fact tilting his head. His face heated at the realization and he wondered if he would have to leave sooner rather than later. 

“Sorry, I didn’t know, I-” He rushed to explain, to make things right. To apologize for making him uncomfortable. How many times would he screw up a good friendship over a simple head tilt? How many times would he have to apologize for finding his male friends attractive? How many times would he have to repent for not wanting to be with women? For not wanting intimacy by proxy of sex? How long would he suffer for being different? For being strange and everything wrong and weird? 

What is wrong with me? What is wrong with me? “Whatiswrongwithme”

A good morning had turned awry and he wasn’t sure he could handle losing another friend. Another safe space.

“There’s nothin’ wrong with ya,” Thomas pulled him unexpectedly into a hug. His arms encased y/n into a warm and welcomed cocoon. His face pressed into Thomas’ neck and he hadn’t realized tears were falling from his eyes until he felt the wetness smudging against his face and onto Thomas’ shirt. 

Thomas’ words rang inside his head. All his life he had been told that there was something wrong with him. Or he was asked what was wrong with him. It didn’t matter what form the question or accusation came in. It always left him feeling displaced from everybody else. For the first time, he felt validated. He had never known what that felt like. But Thomas, beautiful brilliant Thomas, made him feel everything he had ever dreamed of feeling. 

Thomas’s hands squeezed him tighter, his hands rubbing his back calmly, “You’re perfect just the way you are, you hear?” 

His heart stuttered and then he was bawling. 

He was perfect. 

So often he had been told he was imperfect. Unlovable and incapable of love. 

But here, in his arms, y/n began to realize that he was capable of love. 

He pulled away from Thomas’s arms and tried desperately to stop the onslaught of tears, “I’m sorry, I di-” 

Thomas stopped him, hands gently grabbing y/n face, his thumb brushing aside the stray tears and his blue eyes so soft and welcoming, “No need to apologize”

Birds chirped outside the window, filling the silence with a new song, “Didn’t think you were interested. But I see there’s a lot going on inside that head of yours” 

Y/n found himself growing weak, “I-I am, interested.” It felt weird to admit. To say something he had spent his whole life hiding away. “But-”

Thomas shushed him, leaning forward and giving him a soft kiss on his forehead, “Take your time, I’m in no rush.” 

His kiss burned into his skin. It wasn’t needy or possessive. Wanting and lusting. But was soft and sweet. A true sentiment of Thomas’ patient nature. 

His hands moved to cover Thomas’ hands, which still cupped his face, “I’m rather slow” 

“I’m patient.” 

“I’m not very fond of sex.” He admitted. Despite finding Thomas attractive, he still didn’t think he could do what everyone had expected of him. 

Thomas asked, “Do you like it when I do this?” 

He pulled him back into a hug for a demonstration. His hands ghosted over his back once more and tightened around him. Y/n face pressed into his neck, inhaling the scent of cologne, whisky, and cigarette smoke. His body melted into the hug, happily sinking into his arms. 

“And this?” Thomas probed further, pulling away and placing another kiss, this time on his cheek. Y/n had closed his eyes during the demonstration and found that he had enjoyed it a lot more than he thought he would. So he nodded. 

“Then that’s enough for me.” 

Thomas's response was final and certain. They swayed in place, happy and content. For the first time in his life, y/n had found someone who saw him and wanted him without any pretense of sex. A feat he never thought was possible. But made true in this very moment.

Taglist: @mysticalpandora @ultimatreality @lovecleastrange @watercolorskyy @rockerchick05 @lyarr24

[marshmallowprotection]

so I was just thinking. of course I love all the mysme characters as love interests, but I feel like one of the most slept-on aspects of this game is the found family dynamic of the rfa. do you have any platonic headcanons of mc just being close to the others in everyday life?

(aka I desperately need a break from all the angst of this game lmao)

Gush over your love of musicals and theater with Jaehee, and if not that, with your special interest that she values just as much as you value hers. What're friends for? She knows what it feels like to need someone in your life who supports you.

You've done that for her all along. So, she wants to do the same for you! The two of you can spend hours talking to each other about anything and everything and your voices are finally heard. Nobody in the world might be able to keep up with you two when it comes to interests, but that's no problem here. Gush to your heart's content.

Get into a heated debate with Zen about the semantics of method acting versus classical acting. It doesn't matter if you understand what he's talking about or not, what matters is that the two of you can laugh about the different approaches that actors take to their roles.

He's tried every method there is out there so if you're curious about the semantics of these things, prepare to be at his acting mercy as his bestie. Jaehee is so jealous of you! You should make sure to remind her to drop by since this is a debate between friends. Imagine how far these silly conversations can go, it might just lead you into tagging along to set one day.

Laugh your heart out when you decide to take on Yoosung's offer to make a meal for everyone. Messy food and zagged lines but that's the least of your concerns. It's not all about making the food perfect. It's about the taste and the time you share. You can tease him about the messy faces he makes on his omurice and he can tease you about the silly additions you add to your half. Laughing and taste testing your snacks before you share it with everybody is a must!

Of course, just be wary of the fact that there are some dishes he simply can't make yet. You do not want to be the test dummy for a soup that turns purple without there having been anything in it to make a purple in the first place. It's okay, just get Zen to be the guinea pig. Now that's a friend that'll take one for the team.

Have a deeply intellectual discussion with Jumin late into the evening hours. As a close friend and his life, he is willing to talk to you about anything and everything that comes to mind. It doesn't matter if he knows the topic or not firsthand, he truly wants to learn and understand more about it.

Most of the time, he could prepare a schedule for the two of you to talk about different things and if you aren't ready for that, you may not know what to think when he shows you an itinerary of the different topics you can talk about through the night. Not only is he learning something but you're learning something as well. The most important thing is that the two of you laugh and it's a nice thing to hear that from your friend.

Play a prank on everybody with Seven. Listen, if there's an opening, he wants to make sure his friends are happy and comfortable. His pranks aren't because he's trying to mask himself, most of the time, he's doing them because he wants to keep his friends on their toes and remind them that it's important to laugh now and again.

That's hard for him to do himself, so, sometimes he has to live vicariously through his friends. It's nice when you tag along for the situation because nobody would ever suspect you to go along with whatever plan he had on hand. Just apologize in advance to your besties in the RFA. He means well and that's the most important thing.

Get lost in a painting with Jihyun as you try to discern the brush, style, and aesthetic in a gallery together. He seems to know anything and everything there is to know about every painting you come across, and while he might have been condescending in his teenage years if you expressed your lack of knowledge in the matter, that's not the man he is today.

The person he is today wants nothing more than to be able to share the experiences of art and the passion that it brings. He was able to find himself in his art again and now he wants to be able to share that experience with other people. Because art is an experience, it's not something that you keep to yourself if you choose to share it. Just, don't get him started on certain topics because he can be so passionate that you'd swear this isn't the soft spoken man you got to know.

Spend your afternoon trimming the leaves and cultivating Saeran's garden as you talk about the world. Have you ever wanted to talk to somebody who is still learning how to take baby steps into the world? Have you ever seen how great it is to be friends with somebody who wants to try everything at least once? Have you ever wanted to listen to somebody admit something that everybody else might be too scared to admit?

That's what it's like when you're friends with him. Being friends with him is like getting to experience something for the first time all over again. Of course, if you really want to tease him, why don't you go ahead and poke a carrot in his mouth and explain why he doesn't get the joke when you ask him "What's up, doc?" That's what being friends with him is like. Of course, you're going to get some free food out of it.

Sit on a porch swing with Rika as you enjoy a sweet tea and think about the world and your place in it. Have you ever had a friend who can sit down with you and talk about a wide array of very vulnerable and personal topics? That would be your relationship with her. It's not something where you're putting the weight of the world on each other, it's more like you finally have someone who knows what you mean when you trail off.

You can complete each other's sentences with a smile. It doesn't always have to be the weight of the world nor does it have to be a conversation where it feels like all you talk about is serious things. Sometimes the two of you are just laughing about a silly puppy video you saw. Being able to sit with her in the sunshine is being able to speak with an old friend known for the longest time and no matter how much time passes, it feels like yesterday.

[nudevastate]

Hi, do you have any advice on practicing separatism?

sure!

1.) the very first thing you have to do is to cultivate a very strong relationship with yourself. i know that's a bit of a dumb thing to read, but it's true. as women, we have always had to play a role in a patriarchy. we are always just someone's daughter, someone's mother, someone's sister, someone's girlfriend, someone's wife, someone's concubine and so on, and never just us on our own. get to know yourself without needing the filter or having to live vicariously through your relations with other people. find yourself and find what it is that drives you. are you a creative soul? find something to create. do you have a lot of love to give? volunteer at a shelter, whether it's for battered women, the homeless, or animals. spend time in solitude and learn to listen to yourself.

2.) and then, go ahead and find your soulmates in other women. maybe that sounds overdramatic lol but definitely find your tribe with women exclusively. if there is a hobby you are into, find out if there is a club somewhere you can join where there are lots of women to get to know. make female friends exclusively. it's not to say that you should ignore men outright (might be too dangerous to do that), but you shouldn't rush to make them your friend. if anything, you should prevent making any male friends until and unless he proves himself to be trustworthy. (which may never happen, so whatever.)

3.) the obvious and the most debated portion of separatism is to, of course, abstain from dating, having relationships with, and having sex with men. i could pull up so many statistics and reports as to why being with men is horrible for women's health and livelihood, but i'm sure you can find those yourself. realize that the concept of heterosexual romance is made up in order to prop up the institution of "traditional marriage/family life" geared up by secular religious groups that are extremely misogynistic in nature. you can always take yourself out on dates; you can always go on "friend dates" with your gal pals. you can always masturbate or, if you do have same sex attraction, have sex with other women. you can always just date women. or just be single and thriving!

4.) a lot of the times, when women waste their time with men, they also end up missing out on some amazing opportunities. i know i missed out on some great milestones in my life back then because of this. now that you're single and by yourself, what do you want to do? what is it that you've always wanted to try, but didn't because a moid told you no? do you want to travel? get a tattoo? get a wild haircut? work on your body at the gym until you've got envious muscles? (men seem to hate muscles on women for some reason which is dumb.) now go ahead and DO THOSE THINGS, and realize how stupid the whole thing was when an ex-bf tried to prevent you from doing those things. it's because they make women happy. women are the most happy when they get to call the shots in their own lives. it's your turn now!

5.) find a community that accepts and even strongly encourages your separatist lifestyle. thank god for the internet. you can find likeminded women on here, on discord (there are loads of female exclusive discord groups to join out there now!), or other online spaces that you can find other women who are just like you. they will also give you tips on how to deal with emotions that comes with it, such as loneliness, and how to combat it. bonus tip: there ARE religious/spiritual groups that are female exclusive. dianic wicca is one of those, and they only let in women to join. practicing spirituality with women is so amazing and will also help you distance yourself further from men.

6.) request a woman. whether that's for your primary doctor, your gynecologist, a plumber, a driver, a teacher, an electrician, a photographer, whatever it is, try to check and see if you can request a female. if you can't, go someplace else. i understand that this is sometimes impossible in certain situations since men take up 50% of the world's population, but you have a voice and a mouth and you should use them. request a woman. hire women!

7.) not sure how old you are, but assuming you are in high school or about to graduate, see if you can go to an all women's college or university. if that's not possible, be sure to request going into classes that are run by female professors either all the time or the majority of the time. i can't tell you all the horror stories i've read and heard from female students when it comes to abusive and/or creepy male professors. be on the lookout for female professors on campus, and talk to them to help you out with your class schedules each semester. you deserve to be in a female only space.

8.) this is a hard one for me, but try to phase out your media consumption that was created by men. start watching movies and tv shows that are made from female directors. read books by female writers (you can start small with reading fanfics made by women lol and then go into actual books). buy products that was made by women, for women, and stop putting your money into corporations that are run by men who don't care about you. listen to music that was made by women. consume and purchase artwork made by women instead of men. watch videos made by women about topics you are passionate about.. these will normalize being in a world filled with female voices that may be similar or different than you. realize you don't have to keep listening to men if you don't want to.

9.) this one is also a little hard because of logistics, but try to see if you can work for a women-based company for employment. there may be resources out there especially for women who are in STEM and looking for work, and they can point to the appropriate companies that are either run by women, or are mostly female. it feels good to work in a place that has a lot of women in it rather than with a lot of men. i understand this might be difficult depending on the industry you are in, but try to make the most of it. if you are stuck in a career that has a lot of men in it, continue to practice separatism by keeping a strong emotional and mental distance from male colleagues, and physical if you can help it. (this is why remote work is amazing for women tbh!)

10.) this is more like a final boss thing lmao but if you can, if you have the means to do so, and if it is at all possible.. see if you can find an all female commune to visit at least once, and see for yourself how healing and amazing it is to live amongst women in everyday life. this is something i want to do in the long term, but i need to do some things in my life first before i can do so. but i would love to continue with and end my life in an all female commune, and die alongside with women, rather with a man.

and there you have it. there might be more, and maybe some others might chime in with their own tips, but these will help immensely. realize that perfection is not necessary, and you will stumble a few times before you can become 100% separatist, but it is possible so don't worry and take your time!

[amazingmsme]

I haven't really asked before but I really like the idea of a ticklish Paul! It's one of the big things that people in office learned about him on accident, I'm not sure where. Emma loves it too, and Paul tries to keep a straight face and neutral tone about it at work but it's one of the things that makes his generally same old same old days memorable. So he does like it. Before Emma, the thing that gave him that spark of 'this is different' was that.

Also I love all this so much. I never really got to do much with tickling, either as a ler or a lee. Most of my family including me has diagnosed autism and doesn't handle ticking well. For my sibs it tends to not be fun at all for them.

As for me, I do like it, and I've discovered all my spots because I self soothe with my hands, which is fun! (And the sensitive arms thing from before? Amazing that's basically me but more so) however unfortunately people gave up on tickling me pretty early on because my first instinct is kicking. And I can't help it. But whenever a friend tries now my legs are longer and usually have shoes amd I have to explain that I didn't mean to!

So reading these is so interesting and fun!

Sorry for all the extra story. I was wondering if you had links to some more fics you wrote? Or ones others did? They made my day yesterday

Aw I’m so glad that you enjoy my content & are able to connect with it! Sadly you & I are in the same boat, because it’s legit been years since anyone actually tickled me & when people do, it’s literally just like a 1 second thing. Most people are conditioned to believe that everyone hates being tickled, & our own physical reactions just make them buy into that belief even more, even if it isn’t exactly true. You can’t really control your reactions when tickled, even if you like it, so don’t feel bad about it. If your friends try again, you can maybe try to slip in the fact that you don’t mind it. (I feel like that might be easier than saying you like it, baby steps & all)

I’m glad my fics & headcanons can resonate with you & others, we’re all living vicariously through our blorbos, myself included 😂

& I agree wholeheartedly about Paul! His workdays can get to be so long & boring, so he appreciates a little lighthearted roughhousing to break up the monotony. I feel like Bill might’ve found out on accident when he squeezed past him in the break room, but he promised to keep it a secret. Ted on the other hand was trying to sneak up & scare Paul, but he squeezed his sides a little when he grabbed him & a giggle slipped out. Ted immediately tested out the new information & now he loves to go bother Paul when he’s bored & hear him giggle & snort. Paul tries to act like he’s annoyed by it, but his work is really boring, & he loves any excuse not to do work

Emma loves everything about Paul & she’s just so smitten for her dorky average man. Maybe he was feeling sore so she offered him a massage & that’s how she found out he was ticklish. I think she found out pretty early on in the relationship (like any good girlfriend) No one can resist Paul’s adorable bubbly laughter!

I have plenty of fics to choose from on my blog, but I gathered my tgwdlm fics, & some others I’ve found!

Let Me Hear It was my first fic for this fandom & I just needed a happy ending where they’re all alive & having fun together

Down A Peg was really fun to write & has Ted getting a taste of his own medicine

Wakey Wakey Teddy is just a cute sweetkoffski fic where Charlotte wakes Ted up with tickles

Wake Up (Proto)Call my first npmd fic ft. Ted

@happyandticklish also has some tgwdlm fics!

Lighten Up Ted is the office’s resident tickle monster & he makes it everyone’s problem

You Can’t Make Me Emma forces convinces Paul to go to an office party

I hope these can tide you over! After I finish my commission I’m gonna work on some of the Hatchetfield prompts I’ve got! I’m up to my neck in this fandom & I have so many ideas I wanna write!

[archaiclumina]

(from sealrock) List 5 things that make you happy, then put this in the askbox for the last 10 people who reblogged something from you! get to know your mutuals and followers (ू•‧̫•ू⑅)♡

omg how cute!! (⌒▽⌒) here goes... 1. People with really loud, distinctive laughs. I don't make much of a sound when I laugh, so I get a lot of joy living vicariously through my friends with really great, sometimes obnoxious, laughs! 2. Tea. I live by the life philosophy that a warm cup of tea will always cheer you up. I keep a load of different flavours on hand, but I always fall back on Earl Grey, it was a fav of my late brother's too, so it's nice to drink a cup for him c: 3. Music. I listen to music nearly every hour I am awake. I love all kinds of tunes, I love learning about new bands and new subgenres. My ultimate humble brag is that I average around 70k+ minutes of music every year on the old Spotify Wrapped c': 4. Moths. I'm a very big fan, I have a tattoo of a moth. I've called them night time butterflies since I was a kid and I have always just been a big old nerd about them. Lady birds come a close second in the spectrum of "fav insects", I call them Charlie Bugs tho, just in case they're a dude, cause here in Aus, Charlie is a fairly gender neutral name. 5. Philosophy. Every important thing I've learned in this life I learned from an old dead guy! And that makes me happy on loads of levels. Firstly, it's nice to know the dumb things humans think have been thought forever, and that people were writing them down just in case someone else thought the same. It's a nice little reminder of how we're connected through time and space! I also like to think of them like a large array of Grandfathers who will always have my best interests at heart and a solid bit of wisdom to impart c:

[dootznbootz]

Eh, have some Odyssey headcanons

This is nowhere NEAR all of them as I like "revealing" headcanons while writing. I'm also just a very "fluffy" person so heads up! :D

Mentioned it in a different post but Odysseus is very affectionate with his loved ones (overtly so. almost demanding in how he'll just kind of drape himself across you) Even as a kid he was like this. Often just hugging them and/or climbing up them to cuddle. It skyrockets with Penelope, as he was overwhelmed with emotions for her when they first met and that hasn't stopped. Lots of little kisses and nuzzles and cuddling. Almost always clinging to her in some way. He's strange about being touched with basically everyone else though. While he's still caring for his friends, you never know if he's fine with a hug or not. Often times he'll just give you a look of "Don't even think about it" mostly at poor Menelaus as I headcanon him as the most physically affectionate. Lots of slaps on the back and big hugs He's a little hot and cold like that

Adding to that, with Penelope, with said little kisses that he gives a lot of, he's fine with "losing" or "yielding" to her with everything but that. He's always trying to "have the last laugh" or you know, the last affection. He's perfectly fine admitting defeat to her with everything else but this. It's probably something he doesn't even realize that he does. He loves being doted on and pampered by her but also unconsciously thinks "you're getting smothered. As soon as you stop moving your hands through my hair. I'M gonna smother you" Get adored, Penelope. (●♡∀♡) I am living vicariously through these dummies.

Laertes always had a "green thumb" even before he left the palace to work in the fields. He always liked plants. If you know how J.R.R. Tolkein writes, basically nonstop about ferns and undergrowth and such, that's Laertes. If you go on a walk/hunt with him, he'll often just look at plants and be happy and likes to study them. He was very picky about how plants are arranged on the property. He's a bit more quiet and "gruff".

Odysseus definitely mostly takes after his mother in almost everything. Her humor and mischief, her looks, even learned to woodcarve from her. She and Penelope get along great and she's definitely the "life of the party". (it's MY headcanon and I can do what I want!!!) While Laertes loves his trees and plants, it's even better when he can share that knowledge and passion with his wife who creates something entirely new with that plant (aka wood). "That's walnut you know. Did you know it blahblahblahblah".

Ctimine actually takes a lot after Laertes but mostly in the "kind of quiet" way but she's the type to make one-liners that make everyone in the room laugh. (that she gets from her Mother. I actually want Laertes to be kind of awkward lol) It's a "she doesn't talk much but when she does. You should listen because she's fucking funny." She actually likes plants as well. (as a child she would find out what stuff tasted horrible and then dare Odysseus to eat it. And ofc he did it basically every time. "Eat a raw Olive, idiot. >:) " ) and probably was more into herbology and its uses. When Odysseus comes back, she and Laertes want to know every detail of the Lotus and the Moli Root.

Penelope has a sweet tooth! Also, I have her quite short despite being a Naiad as I have a headcanon that like a lot of fish, water nymphs grow to the size of the body of water they're in. Or in this specific case, BORN in. Penelope was born in a creek/stream🥲 Her mom dove into the nearest source of water and that was it. (kind of goes along with her duck myth) She also canonically says the most out-of-pocket shit (remember the sneeze of death???) she's a "weird girl". She has been "weird" since the beginning. Weird girls are hot as fuck, you cowards!

Penelope: One time, I fell asleep at the bottom of the river and I woke up to a catfish trying to eat my arm. Mom and I killed it and ate it afterward. Odysseus, twirling his hair and giggling: You showed that catfish who's boss. You're so hot. Please be my wife

(That's all you're getting on her. The Wife of all time will be getting her own headcanon post all to herself because she deserves it. I am doodling lil hearts around her face. *I am shot by Odysseus*)

This'll probably be my most unpopular one but yeah. Odysseus isn't the shortest of the Achaean kings. He's actually taller than average (great grandchild of Hermes genes and his mom is tall. Laertes is shorter.) and while shorter than the other kings. The title of the shortest goes to Diomedes. I love the thought of this absolute killing machine being the shortest in a "He's small? What can he do?" and then he just fucks everything and everyone up. He's a chihuahua. Small, full of rage, "loud of warcry", and always wanting to fight. >:)

That's all for now. Honestly, thank y'all so much for being so sweet. It really means so so much. I was kind of afraid I was too "fluffy and soft" to make content for the Odyssey fandom as while yes, they've all done monstrous actions and I definitely still plan to have them steal, lie, barter, fight, etc. I kept getting worried if I was just making shit too soft you know? Too fluffy. Too "romantic". I have him sneak into a garden and cut someone's flowers for his wife but would he even do that?? Is that too nice of him?

I wear my heart on my sleeve and in my writing, I'm the same way. :D Just how I am! And I'm having fun!

[aziraphales-library]

Hello!! I love all these suggestions you guys find! I was wondering if you knew of any Band AUs? Like Crowley learns to play electric guitar over centuries and eventually starts his own band or like he loves playing music and sings about azi a lot and thats how he confesses? Sorry i know that sounds very specific but just anything along the lines of Band AU is great thanks!! If not i can always write my own xD

Hi! Here are some band AU fics for you...

greatest hits by attheborder (M)

“But my dear, I just can’t believe you never told me that you had joined a musical group. I would have come out to support you— at your gigs!”

“First of all, never say ‘gigs’ again. Second of all, not my fault you never noticed when I showed up to dinner with a great big guitar case slung over my shoulder.”

(Aziraphale accidentally discovers Crowley’s secret: he was in a band in the 90s. And he wrote a whole album of love songs…)

Private Gig by madrabbitgirl (NR)

Aziraphale is on a miserable date with Gabriel, his most recent Grindr mistake, and is considering breaking things off when a sweaty musician in tight trousers appears before him, basically making the decision a snap. Aziraphale hasn't seen Crowley in a few decades, but their reunion is... passionate to say the least. Will they ever talk about why they stopped speaking in the first place? How does a stuffy bookseller go about dating a rock star?

Reunion by snae_b (E)

Aziraphale runs into an ex that he's never quite fallen out of love with.

Never Have I Ever (Been Myself) by FeralTuxedo (M)

Aziraphale Fell, BAFTA-winning actor of stage and screen, is bored. Bored of playing middle-aged divorcees in dull BBC dramas. Bored of answering the same questions on chat shows and breakfast television. Bored of keeping the real him hidden away. So when the opportunity presents itself to collaborate with up-and-coming rock band Witching Hour, he takes it, against his own common sense and the condescending advice of his agent. Witching Hour’s mysterious guitarist Crowley, flame-haired, moody, and a good fifteen years his junior, certainly seems worth the risk.

A human actor/rock star AU.

Soho by Lurlur (E)

Aziraphale lives a quiet kind of life, running a quiet specialist bookshop in one of the liveliest districts of London. He's content with his lot, happy with his friends, tolerant of his probably-human housemate, living vicariously through the gossip pages.

One day, a chance encounter with Anthony Crowley, lead singer of wildly successful rock band The Demons, threatens to turn his whole world upside down.

Win a Date With Anthony J. Crowley! by Caedmon (E)

Crowley is a world-famous rock star who sells out arenas. His name is synonymous with 'rock-n-roll', and he thrives on the spotlight. When he agrees to raffle off a date with himself for charity, he's expecting to meet an overzealous fan that wants to wear his skin and very well might try to roofie him. What he's not expecting is to be instantly attracted to the quiet man with the unusual name who shows up for the date at the Ritz... and he's certainly not expecting for Aziraphale to have no clue who he is...

- Mod D

[beloveddawn-blog]

"... And he insisted I was losing rhythm during the drum solo so I told him to put his mana orbs where his mouth is and brought my drum set to the creek with me. Then Iris showed up with a violin she's been working on, and Vaan brought his flute, and anyway, long story short I woke up to an official noise complaint from Wesley. I paid everyone's fines because I started it, but I think I'm just gonna lay low until he calms down a bit."

Nathanial laughed so hard he almost cried listening to his wife talk about why she was currently avoiding Nel'Vari. One day, when she had defeated Dynus and Sun Haven was out of danger, he would go with her and see it, but for now he was content to visit it vicariously through her stories. Vaan came by the farm not infrequently, waving from his cloud as he soared on by. Iris had been lured away with the promise of a festival the first year Teleri had lived here and came to every special event now. Nathanial had even had the dubious pleasure of meeting Wesley last Halloween, and had found him just as awkward and uncertain as he had expected with the other man so wildly outside of his comfort zone. But there was one person Teleri always talked about that he hadn't met yet, and he had heard some interesting things recently.

He had never been one for subtlety, so he just dove right in. "Vaan told me something interesting the other day. Something about your friend Lucius."

Teleri snuggled up on his shoulder, her own animated tale obviously done with, and grinned up at him. "Ooh, gossip? Did Vaan come to visit? Or is this from the Lantern Festival and you've been holding out on me for two full weeks?"

He laughed again, charmed as always by his beloved. "The Lantern Festival, but in my defense I was waiting for you to hear about it organically. I thought you might have." She shook her head, and he continued. "Vaan said that Luke was teasing Lucius about only ever talking to you and Opal, but instead of his usual line about the Moon being all he needs in life, he replied that anyone with the good fortune to know you would understand why you were an exception. Apparently you even asked about becoming a Moon Attendant yourself, except it's another eighty nine years until they recruit. Luke was talking about it in a 'she's as crazy as he is' sort of way, but Vaan knows you both better."

Teleri was quiet for a moment, and Nathaniel let her be. She was very serious about all of her relationships, in her own way, and learning that a treasured friendship was edging towards more would throw most people off. Eventually she grinned and tucked her face back into Nathaniel's shoulder.“I would be a poor Moon Attendant, probably, since I do not do well at sitting still. Perhaps it is a skill I will need to learn. Or perhaps I shall just have Lucius cover for me when she asks around, like a child sneaking out of lessons. He is quite fond of me, and a millenia or more spent with him would be no hardship.” Her smile turned a bit softer then, and it was impossible for Nathaniel to ever feel jealous of Teleri’s ability to love when it made her this happy. Then she smirked, still pressed against his muscles. “I must admit, I have a definite preference for a strong set of shoulders. And he favours as much skin available for the Moon's glow as possible. It's nice. It's a very nice welcome to the city." 

Nathaniel couldn't help it; he burst out laughing again. "That's what catches your eye, is it? I have my uniform to thank for getting your attention? And when they bow it'll be on to the next set?" He truly, *truly* meant it as only a joke, they understood each other very well and he had been aware since they had begun dating that she would outlive him by ages. Teleri, though, for the first time ever, did not take it as the joke it was.

"I will *never* abandon you." She swore fervently. "Never. We will travel the path of a soldier's life together until the day we break free to explore Mother Ocean. Even as your shoulders bow and your hands shake I will never stop showing you all the wonders this world has to give. But eventually even my skills and magic will not be enough to keep you with me, and at that point I will consign your beloved shell to the rest you have asked for it, and then I will return to land."

"Beloved," he began, knowing this was a whole lot bigger than just the issue at hand. "What is bothering you? You know I don't mind that you will outlive me, nor that you will love others. Not even that you will likely marry again. I've always thought that was what you wanted. Am I mistaken?"

She burrowed deeper into his shoulder at first, then shot up to sitting. She curled her knees to her chest and stretched her arms to her feet, allowing her hair to drape over her face and obscure her. It was both indescribably vulnerable and heart-wrenchingly defensive, and he ached to see his most treasured person so distraught. He joined her in sitting, then wrapped his arm around her and waited.

And waited.

And waited.

When she finally did speak, it was so soft he almost didn’t catch it.

“Do you think that if I am a Moon Attendant, the Moon Goddess might keep my soul?”

Nathaniel blinked.That was not at all what he had expected to hear, and he wasn’t certain where to even begin to approach this. No tactical or leadership training could ever be enough for this. “Is… possession of your soul something you worry about?” He asked, not even sure if it was something she wanted or not.

Teleri gave a shuddering sigh, and Nathaniel tightened his arm.

“I am truly immortal, in some ways, but I can die. You know this. I do not age, but I can be killed. We talked about this long ago.”

“You are one of Mother Ocean’s earthborn children.” He replied. “A facet as much as an individual, and as much your own fiercely independent self as you are a part of a greater whole. I remember.”

She flexed her toes, a nervous gesture that sent chills down Nathaniel’s back. Teleri was never still, it was not in her nature to be so, but she wasn’t really a fidgeter either. It just underscored how truly out of their elements both of them were. “Well… I don’t want to be.”

And then she burst into tears.

Nathaniel attempted for a moment to gather her up, but Teleri wasn’t budging. Eventually he settled on rubbing her shoulders and making soft cooing noises at her. Her sobs subsided as quickly as they arrived, and she stilled as she buried her face even deeper into her knees.

“I don’t want to become part of Mother Ocean’s whole again.” She admitted, surer this time. “If I wanted to be pure element living with other elementals I would be doing it. I want to be an individual. I want to have adventures. I want to explore all that life can offer with those that I love beside me. The Moon Goddess understands that. She is a mortal goddess, for all she is truly immortal herself. She protects and keeps and is worshiped by mortals. She loves them for their flaws as much as for their hearts. She gathers her departed souls to her for solace as they leave, but gives grace on those that are not ready to take that step yet. Given all of that, I wonder if she might give that grace to me, when bad luck finally strikes me down. Because it will eventually happen, and when it does…” She turned her face out of her knees then and gave him the most heartbreakingly beautiful smile he had ever seen before. “I would like to see you again on the other side of it all.”

[roses-in-the-shade]

Submas Born By Death AU [Part 2]

Want to see the beginning? Here's the link to Part 1!

All posts for this AU are tagged as "born by death au".

Emmet's and Ingo's parents only become aware of Ingo's lasting presence only a couple years before the shock incident. They were always aware Emmet would sometimes converse or play with something they couldn't see, but they had initially chalked it up to Emmet having an overactive imagination, an imaginary friend. They were never ready for Emmet to excitedly rant about Ingo playing train conductors with him when they had never told him about his deceased brother to begin with.

Emmet isn't sad to learn that Ingo is - was? - his older twin brother. He's verrrry happy, actually! He has a twin brother! Ingo is already his bestest friend ever, he's glad to be able to call Ingo his brother now.

This is shortly after Ingo becomes able to "whisper" to Emmet, as this is when Emmet learns Ingo's name. Emmet spilled the beans almost immediately. It never occurred to him to keep Ingo a secret. In fact, he thought this was "normal". It was HIS normal, after all.

As a ghost, Ingo's soul is what retains his memories, and he seldom forgets anything as long as he is "aware". He remembers his name because he remembers that is what his parents called him before and after his untimely death.

Ingo's "awareness" will occasionally fade if he pushes himself too hard, or if he becomes too stressed. He'll temporarily black out and his form will dissipate, again like a gas, until the stress fades away or he regains enough energy to become "aware" again. It is much like a dreamless sleep, and nothing happens when he is in this state. Recovery time varies. (One time, his recovery took so long, Emmet became worried Ingo wouldn't come back.)

Ingo and Emmet both still become battle fanatics and railway fans.

Ingo goes with Emmet on his Pokemon journey, and only a little put out that he technically can't participate. But he is determined to live vicariously through his little brother! He will often strategize with or give advice to Emmet, in and outside of battle.

Their parents asked Ingo to make sure Emmet stays safe. As the "older" brother, he was inclined to agree to the request.

Eventually, they meet a Litwick. Ingo and Litwick become fast friends.

"Ingo! It's a Litwick! It might eat you!" "Emmet, look! She's so cute! She's a very sweet little lady!" *pokes and pets the Litwick* "INGO!"

Ingo now has a partner pokemon, at the expense of Emmet nearly having a panic attack.

Every so often, they find a pokemon that can vaguely see or sense Ingo (animals can see ghosts tropes), though not as well as Emmet or his partner. Ingo does end up with his own team, much to his family's and his own bewilderment. Ingo's partner helps with organizing and strengthening communication with his pokemon. His pokemon will become better able to see and hear him over time as their connection strengthens.

Emmet and Ingo will multi battle occasionally, posing as a double battle on Emmet's end. This is what awakens Emmet's passion for double battling.

Emmet (and Ingo) essentially becomes a cryptid at some point. An urban legend, so to say. Often because some people will swear up and down they've seen doubles of a strange young boy with silver hair and silver eyes, or that they'll hear another, somewhat similar voice overlapping his during his odd callouts. A certain number of people are convinced he'll steal your soul if you don't run away fast enough after losing a battle against him.

Emmet may or may not be illegally carrying 8-12 pokemon on his person during the late stretch of their now shared journey. Because Ingo can't carry their pokeballs on his own (yet?).

Emmet makes his way through all of the gyms and the Elite Four, but is stopped short at the Champion battle. Emmet doesn't try again.

"I am Emmet! I prefer double battles anyway. I am not disappointed. I'm sure Ingo would've won, though! Yup! I know it! Ingo prefers single battles! And Ingo is verrrry strong!"

Next post? Here's Part 3!

[rodolfoparras]

You already answered that one ask beautifully but I'd like to add my piece briefly.

You might be able to just say you're gay and go about your day but so many of us can't. I'm only out to my few closest friends and online (and even here I have to be careful) because I am in very real danger if anyone finds out. I live in country where it's so so dangerous to stand out and be queer and I can't even be out of my family.

There are millions of people in same situation and worse situations even. I'm lucky to at least be able to have my best friend and this online community. Transition isn't something I can even think about if I want to still have my family and the best I can do is affirm my gender in small ways to make myself feel better about it.

There is a month dedicated to soldiers but this is tired old argument that only gets brought up when people want to hate on pride month. I'm happy for people who live in places where they can he free to live their truth (even if realistically, there isn't anywhere truly safe for us) but so many of us can't.

There is a Serbian movie called "Parada" and it should be on YouTube as well and it is a good little snippet in how dangerous it is to be queer or just different in Balkans.

We didn't have Stonewall, we are still fighting for our rights and if we want to vicariously live through pride parades and be silly on pride month, we should be able to. And people who can be free and go to these parades should be able to feel happy and celebrated at least for a bit. Recognise the privilege you have (if you are lucky to live in accepting country) and be thankful for queer people before you who have done the work and who had protested in past.

You don't have to celebrate Pride Month if you don't want to but you don't get to tell other people they can't or shouldn't.

-🔮

I am very much in the same position sugar bee!!! I am only open to friends, my sister and cousin because I cant live life freely and a lot of times that has made me suicidal and like you I am not able to start t until I get my own job and move far away and even than I’d have to limit contact with my dad so he wouldn’t find out what’s happening on my end

I genuinely do not understand this soldier argument because it feels like it really is Americans speaking about it I don’t think I’ve ever heard a homophobic Swede pull this argument before it’s once again a tactic for the American propaganda to rule

And I definitely agree! I always indulge in reading queer literature straight from the Balkans during pride month because it’s so beautiful seeing yourself for once. While American lgbt films and series are great that’s not a presentation of me and the life I live. So yes celebrate pride learn about the history of this month and most importantly be gay !

[prettygirls-grave]

creating my dream life⋆ ˚｡⋆౨ৎ˚

(part 1)

why?

why do you want to change? why do you want this "dream life?' why do you want to become an architect, or have all A's, or change your mindset? why do you feel happy doing certain things? knowing the why is the key to life. go through things you love or things you hate and ask yourself why!

using myself as an example, i scroll for hours because it distracts my from my negative thoughts and replaces crying on my bed because i'm so lazy with living vicariously through people who are able to push past lack of discipline. this answers my "why am i addicted to my phone?"

another- why do i want to change my lifestyle? because i'm consistently dissatisfied and disappointed in myself for never reaching my full potential, and i yearn and anguish over the life i could be living which causes a spiral of depression (lol) i don't want to live a life i hate!!!!!!

what do you want?

establish what you want. you may have a clear picture, or not even the faintest idea. sit and reflect upon what truly makes you happy and brings fulfillment to your life. you can find shadow work or journal prompts online, or i'd be happy to make a list if you'd like!

→ me (current)

be proficient in tennis

learn to play the guitar

speak fluent italian, croatian, and beginner french

learn cyrillic alphabet

practice drawing, painting, designing, etc

write often

read often

journal often

exercise consistently

spent time outdoors biking, walking, skating, etc

practice meditating

improve on my anxiety (work on ignoring negative thoughts, not allow others to dictate how i feel, feel confident and relaxed)

create some sort of social media to serve as an outlet for my creativity

finish highschool with an IB diploma

build up my own creative portfolio

spend time researching and preparing university

win an essay competition

that's basically my master list of things i can accomplish in a foreseeable time frame.

manifestation

you can accomplish whatever you dream of. for me, i have so many future desires of what i want my life to look like, that i just need to get it out. these are basically just a ton of affirmations of my desires. some of this might seem ridiculous, but this post is more for myself to revisit more than for public use, but if it helps you, enjoyyy!

i am in my dream university with 100% paid scholarship

i am extremely well read and educated

i know exactly what i want out of my education and career

i love what i’m studying

i picked the perfect major for me

i have so many amazing opportunities in every aspect of my life

i have an amazing, fulfilling, affluent career

i attract wealth and money

i am part of so many creative projects

i am scouted for magazine/photo shoots, short films, music, interviews, modelling, movies, brands, career, travel, and academic opportunities

i am incredibly successful in everything that i am spontaneously scouted for

i am talented at everything i try

i am able to learn easily and am consistently motivated

i am naturally gifted in art, music, sports, cooking, dance, design, and all subjects

i take time and enjoy practicing things i’m passionate about

i am passionate about my studies, my career, and my passions

i have an it girl status and live an it girl life

i easily obtain and succeed in anything i desire

i attract people with similar ambitions, passions, morals, and interests

i am surrounded by people who lift me up

i have a healthy, exciting, and fun friend group

i am well liked by all

i attract my dream partner

i am totally unique

i have my desired appearance and body

my life is filled with many spontaneous and wonderful events

i use my platforms to inspire my following

i am praised for my originality and intellect

my personal creative work is published

i live in my dream city

i am effortlessly beautiful, intelligent, creative, inspiring, passionate, and healthy

i am able to have intelligent conversations in any language i like

i am magnetic and unforgettable

i have built my exact desired life by the time i’m 25

i can afford anything i desire

i receive everything on my pinterest

i remind everyone of my pinterest boards

i have a distinct, unique aesthetic that everyone associates me with

i am able to change and flow through life withe ease

i am fulfilled

i love myself and my surroundings

i am confident and free

i love the people around me

i am grateful and proud of my beautiful life

i attract anything i desire

i am free from anxiety and depression

i don’t chase, i attract

i find clarity easily when my path is not clear

i do not live in fear or stress

this is the end of this post, and it'll continue on part 2 which'll be up on my profile shortly!!! i felt like it's better to split it up rather than have one massive post

[funkymbtifiction]

I’m a high Fe user and was wondering if you could give me some advice on how to manage being alone. When I’m alone or in my own head, my thoughts tend to become really negative and I start overthinking and reading up on old stuff like MBTI or scroll through my phone, and I start thinking I’m depressed. But when I’m with people, I start to feel better and my mood improves. How do I combat this feeling?

EFJs have to learn to develop their personality as independent from other people. What that means is that you need to discover who YOU are, what you love, what makes you feel passionate about something, and develop hobbies and interests that do not require others to be around you. In so doing, you will learn to become healthier, to have a life separate from your friends, and identify what is meaningful to you whether or not anyone else cares about it. This will become very useful in allowing you to set your own agenda going forward.

The temptation for EFJs because they need/want people around them all the time is that they live vicariously through their emotional connections and their friends, sometimes not stopping to find out if they even care about the same things their fiends do or not. You need to see your down time away from people not as a time to become upset or lonely, but a time to explore and discover what you love. Instead of revising old topics, seek out new ones. Read books. Learn things. Study languages. Watch a film in a genre you have never seen before and think about how it made you feel. Spend time writing, or drawing, or learning how to do something (YouTube has endless videos that will teach you just about anything). Spend time thinking. Asking yourself questions about your life, and what you want from it, and how you intend to get it, and what your future is going to look like. You need to learn to self-entertain so you are not despondent when you are alone, so decide what you are going to do in your down time ahead of time and then do it so you are not left wondering what to do, and then internalizing or getting bored. Set your own agenda.

I also wonder if you have advice on being the one who is always making plans and stuff. It becomes annoying after a while if I am always initiating contact or making plans or trying to continue the conversation, but there’s no reciprocation. And when I tell people about this, usually, there’s no effect or barely any change. And I don’t want to have to just stop texting people or stop initiating contact because then, I’ll start to feel alone and in my thoughts and feel depressed again.

This can be hard. I am the same way -- if I am not initiating plans, no one sets them and I never get to see anyone. So I choose to do it, because otherwise I won't get what I want, which is time with people. So, if being with people is what you want, you need to simply accept the fact that you will have to be the ringleader unless or until you find another socially-driven extrovert to share the load. There's also the likelihood that you are dealing with a lot of sp-dom introverts, for whom social connections are simply not their highest priority. It's a casual thing that they can do without (horrific, I know, but for social seconds, socializing is optional a lot of the time).

I feel like I should strive to work on being more alone but it’s hard. I feel like I’m a super extrovert, because I’m always reaching out or talking to others, but I don’t feel close with anyone. I feel like people have this image of extroverts as being happy and stuff, but I get lonely a lot. I don’t have a best friend; only superficial “friends”.

I understand and I feel the same way. It can be hard to wait for a best friend to come along -- but stay open and keep looking, eventually you will find them.

I don’t really have any hobbies. I mean, i technically do, but I don’t really act on them that much. <- change this and start doing them

I wish I wasn’t an extrovert sometimes or at least wasn’t super extroverted; I see people being perfectly content being at home by themselves. Why can’t I do that? Why am I fueled by human interaction 24/7? Why when alone I start to get negative and depressed and bored? Idk maybe cuz I’m a teen or strict parents, but I just hope this feeling ends soon.

This will go away when you find balance -- when you learn to keep yourself busy and entertained by doing things in your spare time.

[greengrungeemo]

Mieruko-Chan: One of the Strongest Characters Out There.

Recently, I’ve finished the first chapter manga called Mieruko-Chan, a story of a normal girl living a normal life, until one day it all changes. She suddenly sees the most horrifying creatures throughout her day-to-day life. A simple and fun premise with an outstanding quality: we don’t know the origin of this sudden occurrence.

It’s just one day she spots grotesque and disturbing creatures that vaguely resemble people that nobody else sees. These abominations attempt in every way to catch her attention, yet she never falters. Her strategy is to pretend they’re not there. So then, the reader naturally asks, “why?” If it were any ordinary individual, they’d freak the f*ck out! Like, an “Oh my god!!! There’s severed heads of babies surrounding a womb of a mangled mother!!” sort of deal. Why does she choose to not react? I feel the reason is, she’s already 100 steps ahead of the game.

Let’s put it this way, if she is suffering from a mental illness, whether it’s a visual-auditory hallucination symptom of some kind, or it’s the real deal spirits of Hell, the result will be the same! If she loses her composure, and points out what she sees to others, and they don’t see anything, they’ll think she’s crazy. Not to mention, what will happen when she takes notice of these creatures, they become aware of it, and with this knowledge, they’re able to torment her all the worse? A freaky and precarious situation right here! My astonishment is the sheer fact that she’s able to maintain that composure no matter what creepy monstrosity appears. It says a lot about her emotional resilience and quick-wit.

The premise as a whole says a lot about what people with mental illness do face every day: what they experience, the scary and unpredictable stimuli they encounter, and not quite being able to explain it all without sounding insane. For example, I’ve lived for years with this one-track mind that everything I say would “make sense” to others, be it friends or strangers. It was a stupid mentality. What I’ve learned, the simple reality is that 1) Life isn’t just about my own perspective and 2) logically, some things simply can’t be put together and “make sense” to people. It just doesn’t register as something that can happen to them. The lesson to learn through this is to maintain your composure, always. Keep overcoming that stimuli and push through it.

In this story, she has an awesome best friend, Hana! She’s the scatterbrained, loveable, high-spirits kind of character. The egregious reality is that only Mieruko suffers from this fate, and worse of all, she can’t inform her friend. Imagine the sheer weight of being unable to tell someone you trust most? I think that’s among the most selfless sacrifices one can make - she doesn’t want to get her friend involved in any way, wishes to protect her, and deals with the blows all by herself. That’s amazing. There’s a lesson found right there. Long ago, I trusted my friends so much that I shared every single detail about how I felt to them (I trust them and feel ultra comfortable around them), but what I failed to realize was that I was emotionally dumping on them all that energy. All those details about what’s going wrong. It’s a strenuous thing to encounter that all the time. I wish I realized that much earlier for their sake. I wish I could have shined a brighter, more positive energy and aura around me. That’s sort of how Mieruko feels about Hana! Since Hana is unaware, she lives her life freely, happily, and ordinarily. It’s as if Mieruko lives vicariously through her friend - to grasp any form of normalcy. Hana emits this bursting happy energy, that her presence alone feels like a great distraction to what’s going on around Mieruko - something important to also take from. You can be the clumsiest, silliest, obscure goofball, but that doesn’t matter as long as you’re as true to who you are and you retain a nice and inviting energy around you. It makes a world of difference for Mieruko, and it’ll make a world of difference to loved ones in our lives. <3

So, I suppose the question is, how would you face this fate? Putting this ordeal in your shoes, how would you react?

--------

I guess I wanted to show my appreciation for this character. Mieruko is badass, and she has a really cool style and vibe. The concept resonated a lot with me and what I had to face in a weird way. Definitely looking forward to reading future chapters! No spoilers please! I highly recommend the series to all my friends. ^-^

[fetabathwater]

training and persona and performance and stage name and okay actually. baby:) if you want

questions here!

Training: How did they learn to sing? Have they had any formal training? How do they continue to maintain and develop their singing voice?

Starting with copying songs on the radio, definitely tuning into some musicals and sing-a-longs that were put on the tv to entertain her as a kid. Eventually, Jennifer does go the way of mildly formal training, from what was available in school to forging her parents signatures to sign up with an actual vocal tutor. Her range extended, and for the first few years out of school when she was deadset committing to the band, she continued to utilise a coach. Just prior to BOTB, she had debated working with one again.

Mostly because the anxiety about her simply being palatable, and not much else.

Performance: What are they thinking and feeling while they’re performing? How do they act on stage?

Jennifer loves it. Hot overhead lights and people singing along. Even when they were in a small bar with only a handful of people, it was the slight nodding along and eyes turning away from their glasses every so often to have a look. For the most part, the songs have some choreography attached, mostly so she has a reason to move and hit different points of the stage. It's only small amounts of steps, hips, twists for most songs, save for like one or two specific vocal specific ones. Also she works in the emotion into it, leaning back, giving it her all.

Persona: How does their day-to-day personality compare to their on-stage persona?

Like Superman, Jennifer slips on her glasses outside the stage persona and she's pretty straight edge. Holed up in a corner, with her dog-eared and old book that is held together by sheer will and duct tape. Greasy hair and grey sweats and slides over socks. In line at the corner shop with an aura that is begging people not to talk to her. Generally also has a wheat bag wrapped around her neck. It's kind of weird for most people that she's so quiet save for those who know her, definitely took Orion by surprise not long after taking the job. Some part of him expected to have to hold her up by the scruff of her shirt for the rest of their projected career, based on intensive research on what lead singers are like. Jennifer still does get in the odd croaky jab, which leads to Rowan giving her hell.

Stage name: Do they or have they ever had one? How did they choose it? 

Definitely did trial a few in the early stages of Relentless Caller. One of them was a joke about also choosing a number, like Seven, or Squared. Which definitely did not amuse Seven. Nothing really stuck, but she's fine with that.

Baby: How do they feel about Jazzy leaving? How are they coping? What are their plans to stay in touch?

Jennifer is definitely very happy for Jazzy and wants to support her as best as she can. Definitely one of those things though where your friend's life trajectory goes completely left field compared to yourself, and whilst Jen always knew that Jazzy wanted that in life, with a family and marriage, it's something she stopped imagining for herself. She's ready to live vicariously through planning a wedding, and her coping method is working out a lullaby to gift to the new bub.