#lifestyle personal style guides books

[bookswagon-india]

Lifestyle Books To Take Back Control Of Your Life

In times of stress, personal wellness and health are often the first two aspects of your life to take a backseat. Now’s your chance to get back in the driver’s seat, our selection of some of the best lifestyle books will offer a holistic approach to wellbeing. Exactly what you need to take back control of your life!

So get started and also get these books today from Bookswagon, trust me you won’t regret it.

ALIVE!

ALIVE! Lifestyle Changes to Age-Proof Your Mind and Body by Rachna Chhachhi is essential reading in a post-COVID-19 world, where an integrated approach towards strengthening our immune system has become even more critical.

The writer shares a holistic living plan that can help slow down the ageing process, fend off disease and improve quality of life.

Focused on opting for an unhurried pace to heal yourself, building the mind-body connection and, this nutrition, exercise, sleep, and stress management programmed follows four steps which includes eliminating what harms you, imbibing what heals you, discover your mind-body balance, nurture your healing lifestyle.

The Lifestyle Diet

The Lifestyle Diet is a culmination of the author Rohini Patil’s several years of practice in the fields of diet, nutrition, fitness, mental health and overall lifestyle. The book offers you the practical techniques and some very handy checklists to make your lifestyle diet work. It also talks about the various components that contribute to a healthy lifestyle that is unique in their own ways. The 101 diet plans that cater to all kinds of lifestyles, is the bonus point.

The Power of a Positive Attitude

The power of a positive attitude, Your Road to Success will help you uncover your hidden abilities and achieve success and a lot more.

It helps us to show how to be positive in every situation and if you are facing any issue how to deal it with positivity. And how that positivity is going to affect you.

This book by Roger Fritz details the dos and don’ts in dealing with your boss, provides handy tips for overcoming negative attitude, managing stress, and coping with burnout, and expounds on how converting negative thinking to positive action can bring about a change in life.

The Everyday Hero Manifesto

Robin Sharma makes his transformational system available to anyone who is ready for monumental productivity, undefeatable positivity and deep spiritual freedom. In this book you will discover a breakthrough blueprint to battle-proof yourself against distraction and procrastination so that you produce magic that dominates your domain, the hidden habits used by many of the world's most creative and successful people to realize their visionary ambitions, pioneering insights on adopting world-class routines that will lead you to achieve superhuman fitness and become the most disciplined person you know, original techniques to turn fear into fuel, problems into power and past troubles into triumphs and a lot more.

You can get all lifestyle personal style guides books from Bookswagon at the most affordable states worldwide.

[duskyvenus]

Super Blue Moon: What you need to hear right now

This is a general intuitive reading meant for entertainment purposes. Take whatever resonates. I am still practicing my intuitive ability so feedback would be really helpful :))

Pile 1

You might be wanting peace, a quiet life. I'm seeing walks in the nature, consuming healthy unprocessed food, lots of fruits. You might like red or orange colored fruits (could be any). I'm sensing changes in lifestyle. Maybe you will relocate or renovate your home (changing your aesthetics and style). Your soulmate(romantic) or current partner or future partner(whatever resonates) is sending you messages of affirmation. Also they might like to stare at you and admire your features lol. I'm hearing: It's all about the little things. Maybe this is something you believe in or it is about to become a theme in your life in the near future. A short trip or holiday might soothe your nerves a bit, preferably somewhere cooler. Overall, I think change is coming your away; there's this picture of letting things go and relaxing in a lodge in the mountains while sunlight creeps in through the window. Yeah lots of sunshine imagery in this pile. It's about how the sun slowly warms you up. Slowly and surely you will be moving to the next stage.

Pile 2

Similar to pile 1, I think you might be in need of some sunlight lol. I'm seeing something about hobbies, so maybe you need to get back to them? You might not have completed a previous painting, book, blanket or whatever. I'm also seeing cakes which means some kind of celebration. It might be your friend's birthday soon. Yeah I'm hearing about a dear friend, someone you think is your soulmate (for some of you, they are :] ). Or maybe a connection where either person has romantic feelings and the other feels neutral. Some of you might be studying hard and preparing for your future job and you're trying to keep a positive mindset. I see so many drawings and scribbles in a notebook. This is the student pile. I'm also seeing baked food and the aroma of cafes. Maybe you like to do your work in a cafe with a cup of coffee and some cake. Also you might be secretive and like to keep things to yourself. Might be a homebody. You are working to chase a reward and you're feeling frustrated because the path is so long. Don't be too hard on yourself. Set small goals and reward yourself for finishing them.

Pile 3

Whimsical and airy vibes for this pile. I'm hearing that you might have witnessed something paranormal? Or something that just can't be real. Hmm existential crisis? Questioning the universe? Questioning yourself? I'm seeing wings. You might be wanting to just fly away lol. Or they could be angel wings. You might be feeling lonely. Recently you might have ended a friendship or relationship OR you might have lost someone so you feel empty. I'm really sorry for your loss :( A big phase of your life suddenly came to an end so you're feeling lost. Old memories flashing in your head. Though I also feel that someone wants to approach you with hopes of making new memories with you. They seem like a very doting person and also calm. 'Calm'; your head is a mess and you feel like you're not able to think clearly. You might be asking yourself, "Am I seeing/hearing things?", "Why am I not able to do such a simple task?" Maybe your spirit guides or guardian angel want(s) to communicate with you and for that I'm hearing lavender and mint. Meditation may also help you to sort out your thoughts.

Pile 4

This is the happy-go-lucky pile. I'm seeing you have so much fun with your friends! You seem like the type to uplift people's moods. It feels empty when you're not around. You might feel pressured to keep up this cheerful image. Lately someone might have been rude to you or accused you of something or just bad-mouthed you. You might have felt taken aback because of this and tried to reflect on yourself. Don't worry, they're just jealous. Maybe you started thinking about the time when your demeanor was very different from now; you were not a cheerful person to begin with, but you started acting this way because you wanted to be treated differently. Now that there has been a sudden rejection that is asking you to re evaluate your choices, you are considering reverting back to your old self. Or maybe you think a lot about your friendships and just feel overwhelmed by the love :( This is so wholesome. You feel deeply and often wonder about the outcomes of your actions. I think that's why you wanted change, you genuinely wanted to be of help to someone. Your friends really appreciate it even though they won't admit openly (for some of you, your friend is a tsundere lol)

Pile 5

An ethereal energy in this pile. Stargazing and being mesmerized. You know that feeling you get when you look up at the stars and wonder if someone is watching you? I think your guardian angels want you to know that they are always there for you. If not a guardian angel then a deceased loved one. You have big aspirations but you often feel intimidated. You may have doubts about the path you're choosing. I just want to say that you have the star quality and you're blessed. I'm hearing fate and good luck. If you have been manifesting, try using candles or star shaped objects. You can even use them as a lucky charm. "You drew stars around my scars" - this may apply to you and someone you know. Something about light at the end of the tunnel. 'Hope' ; someone or something gives you hope to keep going. You're working really hard, you just wonder if you'll get the results. This kind of reminds me of pile 2 so you might want to check that out. "Funny how all dreams come true"

Pile 6

You might be talking to someone and you don't really know where this is going? You can say it's a situation-ship. Or you're crushing hard on someone. Either way this is making you giddy. You might also be transforming yourself and so all the changes are making you feel giddy. A very new feeling. You're trying to look at things differently. You're trying to concentrate. You're craving some form of affection. The message I'm getting is that self care will help you get that faster. Also I'm hearing that you have a vibe that is easy to mesh with. People often find you attractive even when you're not doing anything. "Aphrodite's blessings" - you may get the glow-up you've been waiting for. Similar starry night vibes as pile 5. You're also really good at giving compliments and appreciating the beauty of the smallest things. You are a very loving person if you are given the space to do so. "Hang in there baby." - your future partner could be very devoted to you.

A channeled message for everyone: Please eat well !! And have some good sleep!! Take your vitamins!!

[agirlwithglam]

💌✨💗 The ULTIMATE It-girlism Guide: 💗✨💌

(for ages 12-15 mainly)

Hiii pretty girls! Welcome to a new guide: IT-GIRLING 101. It’s time we stop accepting a mediacore life with terrible treatments and up level to your greatest, most loved, most best potential. In this master guide, there will be tips on school/ academics, style, lifestyle/ daily routine, habits, socialising, confidence, mindset, you name it! AND this is specifically tailored for people who are in their early teens <3 (also make sure to check out my youtube channel: iamvanillaangel for more tips!) without further ado, lets begin!

🎀 The It Girl Lifestyle Guide: morning routines, nighttime routines, daily routines/ planning, etc.

👠 The It Girl Confidence Guide: confidence & self love tips/ advice.

📚 The Student It Girl Guide: study tips, conquering school, and academics!

⭐️ The It Girl Mindset: full of mindset shifts/ tips.

🗣The It Girl Guide to Socialising: convo tips & tricks, how to effortlessly make people like you.

🌸 Personal It Girl Guide: personal style tips, hobbies, habits, etc.

also btw in each of these i'll try to add/ recommend an article / book/ youtuber to read or watch relevant to the mini guide.

Stay tuned for the posts!

[femmefatalevibe]

What are traits of high value woman?

Prioritize Your Self-Respect Above All Else: Get goals and standards that align with your needs in every area of life (career, finances, physical/mental/sexual health, emotional well-being, friends, family, intimate relationships, self-development). Express and act in alignment with your standards and dreams. Don't allow the displeasure of others to dictate your actions or daily activities.

Set & Uphold Clear Boundaries in Every Area of Life: State them calmly and clearly. "No" is a complete sentence. Reciprocate this effort to others. Practice the art of discernment, differentiation, and interdependence. Get to know yourself, and learn how to observe your needs independently of others' expectations and desires.

Make A Deliberate Effort To Discover Your Values, Passions, & Boundaries: Figure out what matters most to you in life. What activities, topics, aesthetics, art, clothing, hobbies, sounds, movements, books, television shows, movies, songs, and types of conversations most light you up inside? Here are some resources to guide your self-discovery journey HERE, HERE, and HERE.

Build A Strong Personal Brand & Cult of Personality: I have more tips on building your personal brand, creating your persona (or ‘Dream Girl archetype’), and an ultimate Femme Fatale playbook linked HERE, HERE, and HERE.

Center All Aspects of Your Health & Well-Being: Physical, Mental, Emotional, Sexual, and Spiritual. Celebrate your needs – they make you human. Eat a healthful, plant-based diet, exercise and walk daily, meditate, read at least 10 pages a day, journal, make to-do lists, declutter your space, self-pleasure, recite your affirmations, lean into shadow and mirror work, create morning and nighttime routines. Feeling in alignment is essential to allowing your magnetic aura to shine through. Find all my tips to cultivate self-regard in every area of life HERE.

Read, Study, & Build A Strong Skillset: Designing the life of your dreams is an inevitable aspect of living in your queen energy. Stay informed, read books and articles on your industry, interests, current events, cultural happenings, history, and any other topic that brings you joy or you would find intriguing if someone brought up the subject at a dinner party. Mastering an evergreen skillset is essential for succeeding in your career or building a business. Living in your queen energy means living in abundance. While queen energy is a mindset, it is impossible to fully live in this dream reality without having passions and your finances in order. Start with my entire Femme Fatale booklist HERE and guide to building your dream career HERE.

Consistently Invest in Your Appearance: Choose between investing time, money, or extra effort into upkeeping a polished style, beauty, grooming, and physique-maintaining routine. Wear clean, wrinkle-free, well-fitting clothes – styled and accessorized in a way that appears thoughtful & put together with impeccable grooming (clean hair, nails, skin, etc.). Stay consistent with your beauty/makeup/skincare routines, smelling nice daily, and maintain a scheduled routine (weekly, monthly, every 6 weeks, etc.) for specific treatments that make your life easier and make all the difference. These practices don't need to cost a lot of money. You choose to spend more money, time, or effort on these practices, depending on your personal preferences and based on your lifestyle and circumstances.

Remain Dedicated To Lifelong Learning: Make it a priority to read a few articles and 10 pages of a book daily. Ensuring keep up with your learning & education on different topics and the world is fulfilling and enables you to enter into a wider pool of conversations. This practice also strengthens your mind, sharpens focus, and helps your brain relax.

Personalize Your Interactions & Learn Proper Etiquette: Address people by name, and offer a firm handshake. Maintain eye contact. Say "please" and "thank you." RSVP promptly. Communicate clearly and compassionately. Make the person feel special and like the only individual in the room while introducing yourself. It’s the secret to leaving a lasting impression, 

Master The Art of Engaging Conversation: Prioritizing self-presentation, learning how to listen, holding your own, and encouraging others to feel relaxed are the secrets to becoming magnetic in any social situation. Be mindful of how much you listen (more) and speak (less). Carefully consider your tonality and word choice. Remember and recounter the small details of another person’s anecdote that felt important to them. Acknowledge their emotions and validate them. Read more of my tips HERE. 

Become Extremely Discreet Yet Utterly Shameless: Do as you please, but keep your business (or pleasure) to yourself. Privacy is peace, power, bliss, and radiates quiet confidence – the greatest telltale sign that someone is living in her queen energy. Learn to hold your own. You will be guaranteed to earn respect within seconds of gracing anyone's presence.

Embrace Growth Without Succumbing To Your Perfectionist Expectations: Remember that every skill, successful relationship, and goal takes time and experience. No one has it all figured out. It’s okay if you’re not where you expected to be or desire to be at this stage of your life. Stop comparing yourself – we all have our own paths. Choose to do one small thing every day to make your life better – either a step towards reaching a goal or indulging in a deep desire. Ensure there's a healthy (not necessarily equal) balance between the two. Leave your future self better than you found your past self. Express compassion towards yourself and acknowledge that you’re doing your best. Everything starts to make considerably more sense in hindsight. 

[macrolit]

Do You Have ‘Bookshelf Wealth’?

A TikTok home-décor trend has irked some bibliophiles.

By Madison Malone Kircher

Published in the New York Times, Jan. 15, 2024

When it comes to aesthetic trends, social media loves a catchy name.

Cottagecore. Dark academia. Eclectic grandpa.

Now there’s a new entry to the canon: bookshelf wealth.

On TikTok and other digital platforms, there has lately been much ado about people who own a great number of books and — this is critical — have managed to stage them in a pleasing manner.

If you’ve ever seen a Nancy Meyers movie, the look might ring a bell. Warm and welcoming. Polished, but not stuffy. A bronze lamp here. A vintage vase there (with fresh-cut flowers, of course). Perhaps there is a cozy seating area near the floor-to-ceiling display, with an overstuffed couch topped with tasteful throw pillows.

Kailee Blalock, an interior designer in San Diego, posted a video to TikTok last month that sought to define bookshelf wealth and school viewers in achieving the aesthetic in their own homes.

“These aren’t display books,” Ms. Blalock, 26, cautions in the video, which has been viewed over 1.3 million times. “These are books that have actually been curated and read.”

This literary look, she went on to say, goes well with pictures hung willy-nilly on the walls, sometimes even partly blocking the shelves, as well as mismatched fabric patterns and a bit of clutter.

In an interview, Ms. Blalock expanded on her advice. “I think to really achieve the look and the lifestyle, someone has to be an avid reader and has to appreciate the act of collecting things, especially art and sculpture,” she said.

Though Ms. Blalock did not originate the term “bookshelf wealth,” her video has spurred plenty of online discussion. “The day I ‘cultivate’ books instead of buying what I like to read is the day I’ll know I’ve truly failed as a human,” one user commented. Others remarked how bookshelf wealth was less about reading and more about regular old wealth.

Breana Newton, a legal coordinator in Princeton, N.J., who posts regularly about books on TikTok, was one of the people who responded to Ms. Blalock’s video. “I am going to show you bookshelf wealth,” Ms. Newton, 33, says in a video of her own. “Ready?”

She then gives viewers a brief tour of her home, showing books everywhere — on shelves, in overflow piles here and there, and strewed across the bed. Absent is the sense that the rooms have been staged, or that the books were bought with the consideration of how they would look on Instagram.

In an interview, Ms. Newton said that she worried trends like bookshelf wealth encourage overconsumption. This year, she added, she is trying not to buy any new books.

Another critic of the trend, Keila Tirado-Leist, said in a reaction video: “Who does it benefit to constantly have to name and qualify and attach wealth to any kind of style or home-décor aesthetic?”

Ms. Tirado-Leist, a lifestyle content creator in Madison, Wis., likened bookshelf wealth to “quiet luxury” and “stealth wealth,” styles that have recently made social media waves.

Still, she was understanding that what drives a home-décor trend like this one is a desire to create a home that feels, well, homey. In another video, she described the idea of layering — that is, slowly acquiring pieces and building up to a finished look, rather than trying to buy a bunch of things all at once in an effort to chase a trend.

“Styling a home takes time,” Ms. Tirado-Leist said.

Another TikTok user put it more bluntly in a response to Ms. Blalock’s video: “Bookshelf wealth does not mean you have books. It means you have built-ins.”

Editors’ Picks

A Practical Guide to Quitting Your SmartphoneHow Sad Love Songs Tap Into the Chaos of DatingWhen WeightWatchers Ended In-Person Meetings, They Held Their Own

Madison Malone Kircher is a Times reporter covering internet culture. More about Madison Malone Kircher

[ros3ybabe]

Daily Check in - October 18th, 2023 🎀

Hello my lovelies <3

Here's a little update for today!! It feels nice to be posting again!

🩷 What I Ate Today -

Breakfast - southern style hashbrowns with ketchup, a cup of coffee

Pre Workout snack - one medium banana and a 3/4oz single serve cup of jiffy peanut butter, 1/4 scoop of preworkout (in water ofc)

Lunch - 1 large bowl of protein pasta w 2 slices of buttered bread, a coffee

Dinner - 1 bowl of spicy ramen with a small handful on shredded cheese

Snack - 1 bowl of mint chip ice cream

Extra - 3 cups of coffee TOTAL

Feels like a lot and I did go over my eating goal for the day but it is what it is, I had an emotionally rough day filled with a lot of crying, a therapy appointment, and a lot of calming down from my boyfriend over video call. Rough days happen, and I tend to let myself just feel the emotions in order to sleep easy and have a better next day!

🩷 Personal Accomplishments -

Made it to the gym, attempted a glute workout (left early due to frustration, lack of proerpr form, and to minimize risk of injury)

Wrote down everything I ate and my workouts in my new fitness and health journal

Showered

Did both morning and night skincare routines

journaled a little bit

brushed teeth

did a large load of laundry and put away all clean clothes

washed dishes

had a therapy appointment

cleaned up parts of room, put away new stuff

There were no academic accomplishments bit I am going to complete a good amount of homework before my cooking shift (for my cooking class) tomorrow. I've been trying to take it easy in a way that doesn't set me behind in my academics.

I broke down crying today with my boyfriend. I realized I've been feeling like such an imposter lately. Like I don't deserve all the good and all the accomplishments I've achieved. Like this life I'm living isn't real or this is the calm before some storm. I just feel so undeserving of everything. I feel inadequate, like I'm not good enough for a lot of thing. I feel like I'm perceived as this good daughter, good friend, good girlfriend, good employee, good student, good person but that it's not actually true? Though my boyfriend and my father have both reassured me that it is true and I am doing good. They've reminded me that I just need patience, discipline, and consistency in my habits and that everything is going to be and already is okay. I'm lucky to have such a loving boyfriend and such an awesome dad, too. The men in my life are the people I look up to most <3

🩷 Personal ToDos, Oct 19th -

morning + night skincare

morning cardio workout at the gym

read a chapter or two of a self help book

shower + brush teeth AM/PM

wash comforter + air dry

morning and night guided journal

morning stretching

Daily journal prompt

zoom call with boyfriend

sleep 6 to 8 hours

track all food and fitness in journal

complete 1 duolingo lesson

complete 1 busuu leson

complete 1 kanji review lesson

🩷 Academic ToDos, Oct 19th -

pre lab 8 quiz anatomy lab

lab 7 lab report anatomy lab

component 2 psyc class

nutrition chart: toddler nutrition class

quiz 10 psyc class

culinary nutrition ch 10 quiz

chapter 12 and 13 quiz nutrition class

My goal is to complete all of that between the time I wake up at 5am and 2pm with my morning routine, workout, meals, and getting ready for my cooking thing all in between. But I can do it, I'm not worried. I'll have the time to do it all! I just need to manage my time and not be on my phone as much.

I'm trying to get back into listening to podcasts and watching more producitve and healthy vlogs from youtubers I enjoy! I'm currently watching vlogs and content from Rebecca Jay, Michaela Bento, The Bliss Bean, LenaLifts, truly.jia, Study to Success, Lindie Botes (her earlier language videos), and Mikalya Mags. My favorite podcast is The 5AM Miracle: Healthy Productivity for High Acheivers by Jeff Sanders.

If you have any health, lifestyle, fitness, or productivity youtubers or podcast recommendations please comment them or inbox me so I can check them out!! I am always looking for new content to enjoy!!!

til next time lovelies 🩷

[thedsgnblog]

8 Summer Reads For Creative Inspiration

Summer is the perfect time to relax, recharge, and dive into inspiring books that can fuel your creative spirit!

Whether you're passionate about design or you're a design professional, there are numerous books out there that can provide you with fresh ideas, and the motivation to push your creativity. In this article, we bring you eight must-read books that will spark your creativity and leave you feeling inspired. So grab your favorite drink, find a cozy spot, and let these books transport you to a world of creative brilliance!

Palette Perfect for Graphic Designers and Illustrators: Colour Combinations, Meanings and Cultural References by Sara Caldas

Both a practical and inspirational book filled with color combinations for any design and illustration project. The use of color and its combinations creatively in illustration, graphic and product design also implies understanding what emotions they convey and how they affect our design and illustrations.

Purchase on Bookshop.org — $28 (On Sale) —

Creative Spaces: People, Homes, and Studios to Inspire by Poketo

The debut book from acclaimed Los Angeles lifestyle brand Poketo! Creative Spaces: People, Homes, and Studios to Inspire explores the lives, homes, and studios of 23 artistic entrepreneurs, authors, and designers. From a colorful desk in a tiny closet to expansive homes, Creative Spaces features a collection of unique interiors from across the country.

Purchase on Bookshop.org for $33 (On Sale)

—

Soft Minimal by Norm Architects: A Sensory Approach to Architecture and Design

Norm Architects' humane simplicity creates environments that feel as good as they look. Guided by ideas of well-being, the essence of NA' style is balance: richness focused by restraint, simplicity imbued with warmth, and complexity heightened by order. Be it architecture, interiors, or furniture, Norm's unique brand of soft minimalism speaks to the mind as much as the body, creating spaces for people.

Purchase on Bookshop.org for $84 (On Sale)

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Why Design Matters: Conversations with the World's Most Creative People by Debbie Millman

The author, educator, brand consultant, and host of the widely successful and award-winning podcast Design Matters showcases dozens of her most exciting interviews, bringing together insights and reflections from today's leading creative minds from across diverse fields.

Purchase on Bookshop.org for $56 (On Sale)

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Accidentally Wes Anderson by Wally Koval

A visual adventure of Wes Anderson proportions, authorized by the legendary filmmaker himself: stunning photographs of real-life places that seem plucked from the just-so world of his films, presented with fascinating human stories behind each façade. Purchase on Bookshop.org for $35 (On Sale) —

How to Live with Objects: A Guide to More Meaningful Interiors by Monica Khemsurov and Jill Singer

In the modern home, it matters less whether your interior is perfectly appointed and more if it's authentically personal, unique, and filled with the objects you feel a connection to. Through inspiring home tours and practical advice on how and what to collect, Monica Khemsurov and Jill Singer take you on an educational and highly visual journey through the questions at the core of their design philosophy. Purchase on Bookshop.org for $56 (On Sale) —

Hayao Miyazaki by Jessica Niebel

A richly illustrated journey through the extraordinary cinematic worlds of beloved filmmaker Hayao Miyazaki. Introducing hundreds of original production materials, including artworks never before seen outside of Studio Ghibli's archives. Concept sketches, character designs, storyboards, layouts, backgrounds, and production cels from his early career through all 11 of his feature films.

Purchase on Bookshop.org for $51 (On Sale) —

Dot Line Shape: The Basic Elements of Design and Illustration by Victionary

Going back to basics, DOT LINE SHAPE is a comprehensive collection of projects that manifest the three elements in inspiring and ingenious ways to bring unique creative visions to life. No matter how trends or platforms change over time, they serve as timeless components that provide designers and artists around the world with infinite means of expression to make a lasting impact.

Purchase on Bookshop.org for $42 (On Sale) —

If you're interested in finding more books on design, art, interiors, architecture, and more, check our Bookshop.org profile for more amazing recommendations!

[jabbage]

I keep seeing a post floating around from an aspec person saying how they'd been made to feel monstrous and broken and wrong.

I went through those feelings in my teens and twenties and had some really dark times. I think that society gives us such limited views of what happiness and success look like, and it can be crushing. If you're someone who knows you're not going to pair off or get married or have kids, it's hard to know what a happy domesticity looks like?

I'm in my early 30s now, and I'm so contented with my life. I thought I'd share a little, in case it gives anyone a bit of hope to see one form a happy life can take which isn't perhaps the mainstream?

I wake up to find my little cat purring on my chest, and I give her a cuddle.

I get dressed in a new suit I've brought. I realised recently that off-the-shelf clothes never fit me right, so I've been saving up money to have them adjusted at a tailor. It fits perfectly now and I feel great in it. It's taken a while, but I feel like I've finally nailed a style for myself.

I walk to work, through the park so I can admire the flowers. This takes longer, but it gives me some exercise and I enjoy having the time to think. I stop off at a shop on the way and get some nice sandwiches, my favourite kind of pastry and a drink. Normally I make a pack lunch, but this is my weekly Tuesday Treat.

I have a morning meeting with some of my coworkers, who I feel value me and my work. Personal organisation in my worklife has been a struggle for me, but recently I realised I'm one of those folks who probably has ADHD and wasn't caught by the system. Just knowing this has given me so many new tools which are designed for the way by brain works, and I feel so much more confidant.

For the rest of the day instead of staying in my office I work on a picnic table in the sunshine, occasionally stopping to watch some skateboarders. At lunchtime I eat the food I bought, and I chec discord and catch up with online shenanigans. I enjoy having friendships I've forged with people across the world. I love to visit people and to travel, and my independent lifestyle gives me chance to do that. I also like having people over to stay. I like to say I'm like Bilbo Baggins, I live along in my little hobbit hole but if you come round I'll cook you an elaborate dinner and put you up for the night.

After work I go on a free guided history walk around my local area, and find out about lots of little historical things of interest I hadn't seen before. I also meet new people. Even if I never see them again, it's nice to have that moment of connection. When I get home, I video call with my parents and we share our news with each other.

I cook a quick dinner - these days I don't put pressure on myself to do anything too elaborate. I figure if frozen chopped onion and ready meals help me to eat moderately well and keep healthy, I'll use them. I have some cream which needs using, so eat it with some absolutely monstrous strawberries.

I check my personal emails with my cat purring away on my lap. I've got a little side gig writing and illustrating. I worry that I'm not very good and It doesn't make me much money and I know I'll never be famous (do I even want to be?!), but I do enjoy it. Sometimes I'm confronted with a pile of rejections which can hurt, but it's all good stuff today: the money from a book I worked on came in. There are some more details about a talk I'm giving at the British Library later this year. My agent is sending some possible opportunities my way.

I still have a few hours before bed, so I work on a creative project for a bit. Not something I'm being paid for today: it's a personal craft project. I realised a while ago I have a bad habit of monetising everything, so now I make sure to set aside time in the week to work on things that will be presents for myself or friends.

And then when it gets to about 11, I snuggle under the covers and read PG Wodehouse. I giggle. A lot.

It's been a hard slog, but I suddenly find that I'm a very happy person. There's no partner-shaped or child-shaped hole in my life. I'm content. Every life has highs and lows of course, some days are better than others. I'm sure I'll have many troubles to face in the future, but I consider my asexuality to be a positive and joyful facet of my life.

[theautisticdoctor]

Entry #004

Schema therapy

I love schematics. I love making and filling out schemata. I therefore use the theory of schema therapy a lot, and integrated dialectical behavioral and acceptance-commitment therapy as well.

It really helped me to figure out how much masking I was actually doing and creates some backbone to create alternative ways to healthy unmask and get support. So to help you understand what I’m talking about, I’m writing out the theory down below.

If you want to figure out what maladaptive schemata you have, you can fill out the Young Schema Questionnaire (YSQ-L3 or YSQ-S3 – long or short form)

Schemata

There are 18 early maladaptive schemata that people can have developed during their childhood and adolescence. They get developed by basic emotional needs that did not get met. It’s also really based on personality and temperament if and how a schema gets developed and coped with.

Abandonment

Mistrust and Abuse

Emotional Deprivation

Defectiveness and Shame

Social Isolation

Dependence and Incompetence

Vulnerability to Harm and Illness

Enmeshment and Undeveloped Self

Failure

Entitlement and Grandiosity

Insufficient Self-Control and Self-Discipline

Subjugation

Self-Sacrifice

Approval and Recognition Seeking

Negativity and Pessimism

Emotional Inhibition (Emotional Constriction and Fear of Losing Control)

Unrelenting Standards and Hypercriticalness

Punitiveness (Punitiveness to Others and Punitiveness to Self)

The schema “Emotional Inhibition” can be split up into “Emotional Constriction” and “Fear of Losing Control”, just like schema “Punitiveness” can be split up into “Punitiveness to Others” and “Punitiveness to Self”. This got proposed by Yalcin in 2021 in his paper (Yalcin, O., Marais, I., Lee, C., & Correia, H. (2021). Revisions to the Young Schema Questionnaire using Rasch analysis: the YSQ-R. Australian Psychologist, 57(1), 8–20. https://doi.org/10.1080/00050067.2021.1979885). You can fill out their revised schema questionnaire to make the distinction between those with the YSQ-R.

And now..

You can create a model of your schemas in how much they affect you. This is my model:

I use this model in my trigger schema to identify unhealthy or unhelpful behaviour. Because most of the time when I get triggered, one of my schemas gets triggered as well. This has led me into masking my autistic symptoms or tendencies, but isn’t necessarily helping me to have a balanced lifestyle. I will explain the trigger schema another time.

There are three coping styles or strategies to each schema, surrendering, overcompensation and/or avoidance. For these coping styles we have modi, which helps us give insight into what we feel and think and how we behave. But more on that another time.

Explanation per schema

Down here I’ve put the explanations per schema. The explanations are mainly taken directly from the book Schema Therapy: A Practioner’s Guide, and I slightly modified it in some parts, which is written in italics (Young, J. E., Klosko, J. S., & Weishaar, M. E. (2003). Schema therapy: A Practitioner’s Guide. Guilford Press. p. 14 - 17.).

Abandonment and Instability

The perceived instability or unreliability of those available for support and connection. Involves the sense that significant others will not be able to continue providing emotional support, connection, strength, or practical protection because they are emotionally unstable and unpredictable (e.g., have angry outbursts), unreliable, or present only erratically; because they will die imminently; or because they will abandon the individual in favor of someone better.

Mistrust and Abuse

The expectation that others will hurt, abuse, humiliate, cheat, lie, manipulate, or take advantage. Usually involves the perception that the harm is intentional or the result of unjustified and extreme negligence. May include the sense that one always ends up being cheated relative to others or “getting the short end of the stick.”

Emotional Deprivation

The expectation that one’s desire for a normal degree of emotional support will not be adequately met by others. The three major forms of deprivation are:

Deprivation of Nurturance: Absence of attention, affection, warmth, or companionship.

Deprivation of Empathy: Absence of understanding, listening, self-disclosure, or mutual sharing of feelings from others.

Deprivation of Protection: Absence of strength, direction, or guidance from others.

Defectiveness and Shame

The feeling that one is defective, bad, unwanted, inferior, or invalid in important respects or that one would be unlovable to significant others if exposed. May involve hypersensitivity to criticism, rejection, and blame; self-consciousness, comparisons, and insecurity around others; or a sense of shame regarding one’s perceived flaws. These flaws may be private (e.g., selfishness, angry impulses, unacceptable sexual desires) or public (e.g., undesirable physical appearance, social awkwardness).

Social Isolation and Alienation

The feeling that one is isolated from the rest of the world, different from other people, and/or not part of any group or community.

Dependence and Incompetence

Belief that one is unable to handle one’s everyday responsibilities in a competent manner, without considerable help from others (e.g., take care of oneself, solve daily problems, exercise good judgment, tackle new tasks, make good decisions). Often presents as helplessness.

Vulnerability to Harm or Illness

Exaggerated fear that imminent catastrophe will strike at any time and that one will be unable to prevent it. Fears focus on one or more of the following:

Medical catastrophes (e.g., heart attacks, AIDS)

Emotional catastrophes (e.g., going crazy)

External catastrophes (e.g., elevators collapsing, victimization by criminals, airplane crashes, earthquakes).

Enmeshment and Undeveloped Self

Excessive emotional involvement and closeness with one or more significant others (often parents) at the expense of full individuation or normal social development. Often involves the belief that at least one of the enmeshed individuals cannot survive or be happy without the constant support of the other. May also include feelings of being smothered by or fused with others or insufficient individual identity. Often experienced as a feeling of emptiness and foundering, having no direction, or in extreme cases questioning one’s existence. Also includes parentification to siblings.

Failure

The belief that one has failed, will inevitably fail, or is fundamentally inadequate relative to one’s peers in areas of achievement (school, career, sports, etc.). Often involves beliefs that one is stupid, inept, untalented, lower in status, less successful than others, and so forth.

Entitlement and Grandiosity

The belief that one is superior to other people; entitled to special rights and privileges; or not bound by the rules of reciprocity that guide normal social interaction. Often involves insistence that one should be able to do or have whatever one wants, regardless of what is realistic, what others consider reasonable, or the cost to others; or an exaggerated focus on superiority (e.g., being among the most successful, famous, wealthy) in order to achieve power or control (not primarily for attention or approval). Sometimes includes excessive competitiveness toward or domination of others: asserting one’s power, forcing one’s point of view, or controlling the behavior of others in line with one’s own desires without empathy or concern for others’ needs or feelings.

Also includes the feeling that one is responsible for things one is actually not really responsible for or can be held accountable to. The feeling that one should always be the one to help, e.g., because of the assumption that others will not step up to it.

Insufficient Self-Control and Self-Discipline

Pervasive difficulty or refusal to exercise sufficient self-control and frustration tolerance to achieve one’s personal goals or to restrain the excessive expression of one’s emotions and impulses. In its milder form, the patient presents with an exaggerated emphasis on discomfort avoidance: avoiding pain, conflict, confrontation, responsibility, or overexertion at the expense of personal fulfillment, commitment, or integrity.

When people are very punitive and have unrealistic standards, they often think they have this schema as well. Except they actually are having such high expectations of themselves that it is practically impossible to meet them (all). Then, they don’t actually have this schema, but rather only have hypercriticalness and punitiveness as schemata.

Subjugation

Excessive surrendering of control to others because one feels coerced — submitting in order to avoid anger, retaliation, or abandonment. The two major forms of subjugation are:

Subjugation of needs: Suppression of one’s preferences, decisions, and desires.

Subjugation of emotions: Suppression of emotions, especially anger.

Usually involves the perception that one’s own desires, opinions, and feelings are not valid or important to others. Frequently presents as excessive compliance, combined with hypersensitivity to feeling trapped. Generally leads to a buildup of anger, manifested in maladaptive symptoms (e.g., passive–aggressive behavior, uncontrolled outbursts of temper, psychosomatic symptoms, withdrawal of affection, “acting out,” substance abuse).

Self-Sacrifice

Excessive focus on voluntarily meeting the needs of others in daily situations at the expense of one’s own gratification. The most common reasons are: to prevent causing pain to others; to avoid guilt from feeling selfish; or to maintain the connection with others perceived as needy. Often results from an acute sensitivity to the pain of others. Sometimes leads to a sense that one’s own needs are not being adequately met and to resentment of those who are taken care of. (Overlaps with concept of codependency.)

Approval-Seeking and Recognition-Seeking

Excessive emphasis on gaining approval, recognition, or attention from other people or on fitting in at the expense of developing a secure and true sense of self. One’s sense of esteem is dependent primarily on the reactions of others rather than on one’s own natural inclinations. Sometimes includes an overemphasis on status, appearance, social acceptance, money, or achievement as means of gaining approval, admiration, or attention (not primarily for power or control). Frequently results in major life decisions that are inauthentic or unsatisfying or in hypersensitivity to rejection.

Negativity and Pessimism

A pervasive, lifelong focus on the negative aspects of life (pain, death, loss, disappointment, conflict, guilt, resentment, unsolved problems, potential mistakes, betrayal, things that could go wrong, etc.) while minimizing or neglecting the positive or optimistic aspects. Usually includes an exaggerated expectation — in a wide range of work, financial, or interpersonal situations — that things will eventually go seriously wrong or that aspects of one’s life that seem to be going well will ultimately fall apart. Usually involves an inordinate fear of making mistakes that might lead to financial collapse, loss, humiliation, or being trapped in a bad situation. Because they exaggerate potential negative outcomes, these individuals are frequently characterized by chronic worry, vigilance, complaining, or indecision.

Emotional Inhibition (“Emotional Constriction” and “Fear of Losing Control”)

The excessive inhibition of spontaneous action, feeling, or communication, usually to avoid disapproval by others, feelings of shame, or losing control of one’s impulses. The most common areas of inhibition involve:

Inhibition of anger and aggression

Inhibition of positive impulses (e.g., joy, affection, sexual excitement, play)

Difficulty expressing vulnerability or communicating freely about one’s feelings, needs, and so forth

Excessive emphasis on rationality while disregarding emotions.

“Emotional Constriction” and “Fear of Losing Control” as two different schemata can be explained as an over-control to shame or embarrassment to show emotions and as an anxiety to not being able to control or contain the emotions or consequences and/or impulses following the emotions.

Unrelenting Standards and Hypercriticalness

The underlying belief that one must strive to meet very high internalized standards of behavior and performance, usually to avoid criticism. Typically results in feelings of pressure or difficulty slowing down and in hypercriticalness toward oneself and others. Must involve significant impairment in pleasure, relaxation, health, self-esteem, sense of accomplishment, or satisfying relationships.

Unrelenting standards typically present as

Perfectionism, inordinate attention to detail, or an underestimate of how good one’s own performance is relative to the norm

Rigid rules and “shoulds” in many areas of life, including unrealistically high moral, ethical, cultural, or religious precepts

Preoccupation with time and efficiency, the need to accomplish more.

Punitiveness (“Punitiveness to Others” and “Punitiveness to Self”)

The belief that people should be harshly punished for making mistakes. Involves the tendency to be angry, intolerant, punitive, and impatient with those people (including oneself) who do not meet one’s expectations or standards. Usually includes difficulty forgiving mistakes in oneself or others because of a reluctance to consider extenuating circumstances, allow for human imperfection, or empathize with feelings.

[amazonbooksauthor]

Elevate Your Worth: Conquering Inferiority by Meera Mandakini - Unlock Your True Potential

In a world where self-doubt can often hold us back, Meera Mandakini’s "Elevate Your Worth: Conquering Inferiority" offers a transformative journey towards self-empowerment. Available on Amazon in both ebook and paperback formats, this insightful book is a must-read for anyone looking to overcome feelings of inadequacy and unlock their true potential.

Discovering the Roots of Inferiority Mandakini begins by exploring the deep-seated origins of inferiority. She examines how societal pressures, early life experiences, and internalized negative beliefs shape our self-worth. By understanding these underlying factors, readers can start to unravel the complex emotions that contribute to their feelings of inferiority.

Practical Strategies for Self-Empowerment The book is packed with practical strategies that go beyond theoretical concepts. Mandakini offers mindfulness exercises, cognitive behavioral techniques, and other actionable advice that readers can easily incorporate into their daily lives. These tools are designed to build self-confidence and help individuals face challenges with renewed strength.

Real-Life Stories of Transformation To make her advice relatable and inspiring, Mandakini includes real-life stories of individuals who have successfully overcome feelings of inferiority. These narratives provide powerful examples of personal transformation, demonstrating that it is possible to conquer self-doubt and achieve one’s goals.

A Comprehensive Approach to Personal Growth What sets "Elevate Your Worth" apart is its holistic approach to personal growth. Mandakini emphasizes the importance of balancing mental, emotional, and physical well-being. She advocates for a lifestyle that includes healthy habits, supportive relationships, and continuous self-improvement, ensuring that readers can make lasting changes in all areas of their lives.

Acclaim and Praise "Elevate Your Worth" has received high praise from readers and critics alike. Reviewers commend the book for its insightful content, engaging writing style, and practical relevance. Many readers have reported significant improvements in their self-esteem and overall outlook on life after applying Mandakini’s techniques.

Accessible and Convenient Available in both ebook and paperback formats, "Elevate Your Worth" is easily accessible to a wide audience. The ebook format is perfect for those who prefer digital reading, while the paperback edition offers a tangible resource for regular reference. With the convenience of Amazon, this valuable guide is just a click away.

Conclusion "Elevate Your Worth: Conquering Inferiority" by Meera Mandakini is a powerful resource for anyone struggling with self-doubt. Through a blend of insightful analysis, practical strategies, and inspirational stories, Mandakini provides a roadmap to self-empowerment. Whether you’re aiming to overcome personal challenges or simply want to boost your self-esteem, this book is an essential addition to your library. Begin your journey towards a more confident and empowered self by getting your copy on Amazon today.

[queenslivingkitchen]

Welcome to your luxury dream kitchen | Renovate your kitchen in Melbourne | Baloni kitchen

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[whatwhywhowherewhen]

Homestuck No Game AU: Canon-Imitation Universe: Stridlondes

This is both a comprehensive backstory to potential fics and the barebones of two aus, Stridlonde focused because they fit the style of fan content I like

Harleyberts and all here

I got everyone from both timelines in! I think! I also made charts!

The Guardian versions of the kids are in black bubbles, and everyone else is in gray bubbles. The horizontal lines each mark a year and the higher up the person is the earlier they were born. The numbers are the age differences between characters

Alpha Dave And Alpha Rose treat each other like siblings but are not biologically related. Their childhoods are as ambiguous here as in the web novel

Alpha Dave has a fling with someone and a baby (Beta Dirk) is dropped on his doorstep 9 months later. He is not prepared for parenthood. Raises him as best he can but does not properly guide him nor create a child-friendly environment. Generally immature parenting style with a bit of too little too late on the side. Maybe some conflicting needed accommodations and a mutual lack of understanding. He and Beta Dirk have a blow-up fight when Beta Dirk is around 17-19 and cut contact.

Beta Dirk moves in with his bad-influence acquaintance, Lil Cal, who might be Caliborn. He's basically living the same lifestyle we see in canon but with additional social-influenced self-destruction behaviors

Alpha Dave has another fling, possibly with the same person because it's funny that way, and gets another baby (Alpha Dirk) dropped on his doorstep. This time he actually reads the parenting books and is fully wanting to raise the heck out of this kid, including a binder/computer drive full of notes for things to do/say at different life stages

At the same time, Alpha Rose is in a long-term lesbian relationship and they decide to have a kid (Alpha Roxy). The method is up to interpretation

About 2.25 years after the Alpha Stridlondes are born, Beta Dirk and Alpha Rose's younger sister (Beta Roxy) have the most unfortunate one-night stand between a probably gay man and his female close family friend ever known. It was so awful and morally awkward they decide to split up the resulting twins by gender and pretend the other parent doesn't exist. Canon-typical shitty parenting ensues due to their respective issues. Everyone be grateful that the kids don't have to deal with an attempt at co-parenting from these two

Next comes the drama. When the Alpha kids are around 5 (could be older, could be younger and the story would still work), the Alpha Dave and Rose and Rose's wife die tragically, probably in a plane crash. Dirk and Roxy are home with an older neighbor. Dirk is put in the custody of his next of kin while Roxy is adopted by said neighbor with an agreement and financial support from Beta Roxy and the wife's family

Preschool-aged Dirk sees toddler Dave and decides that's his squishy now. They bond in a very Strider fashion. Around 3-5 years later somebody calls CPS on Beta Dirk and a lack of evidence that Dave is also being mistreated ends with Dirk being removed from his custody while Dave remains. Dirk spends his childhood "raising himself" using Alpha Dave's notes and refusing/not knowing how to connect to any new family. He befriends Roxy and though her meets Rose and Beta Roxy when he's 16 and is finally convinced to visit her. He is either recognized by Beta Roxy or sees a picture of the Alpha guardians and manages to figure out Beta Roxy is Dave's biomom, and therefore a potential legal guardian for Dave. The master plan unfolds from here

Option 1:

Dirk plans to frame Beta Dirk for (hopefully attempted) murder or another crime with a suitably long punishment. All the kids are in on it and help in some sense or another, except for Dave whose role is pretty much "get out of there".

Cue a tension-filled road trip from hell which could involve Dave having to choose between allowing Beta Dirk to be caught actually committing the crime Dirk tried to frame him for and going with Kid Dirk or going back with Beta Dirk and facing whatever consequences arise

Could be angsty, could be an opportunity for Dave to take initiative regarding his feelings towards Beta Dirk and living by and developing his personal philosophies early on in life by forcing him to take active part in making his fate

Option 2:

In this one, Dave is the one who's baited. I watched a video summarizing all the crazy stories about people claiming they wrote My Immortal. One of these involved a woman claiming she wrote it to try and get famous in order to get in contact with her brother who was separated from her by foster care.

Turns out she lied about nearly everything, but imagine she only lied about half of it. Dirk sets up Roxy to fake having written an infamous fanfic. Rose is helping her sell it by coaching her on writing style and edgy fandom culture.

Once it blows up into a giant meme/event, they say they're looking for a 13-year-old boy. Dirk starts feeding out stories and personal info about Dave without mentioning his name or relation to get his attention. They announce a competition. Finish these stories or phrases correctly to prove you're the guy or just share your name if you think you might be him. Either Hal exists or Roxy writes a program to sort all the responses. They receive the longest, most unnecessarily long tirade that not only answers correctly but also goes on about his unrelated thoughts for 2 extra pages.

"It's him," says Dirk, a single manly tear running down his cheek. They all introduce themselves through pester chum and convince Dave to create trickily specific photos and video diaries around the apartment to "prove it's really him". They then send him plane tickets to John's house, where they claim to live, so as to not raise suspicion that this isn't a dumb internet gimmick Dave won.

The moment Dave lands they spring a custody battle on Alpha Dirk using all the evidence Dave collected of how unsafe the apartment and living conditions are, alongside evidence of the giant mansion and steady job Beta Roxy has. That Alpha Dirk already had one kid removed from his care helps their cause. It's over disappointingly quickly

[thesaleswhisperer]

B.S.ers Are SOL in Copywriter Jeff Putnam's World

Professional Sales Tips you'll learn today on The Sales Podcast ...

Listen to Jeff Putnam’s first interview on The Sales Podcast, episode 510, back on June 23, 2021, and see the change he’s made

Deep down, he always wanted to be a writer

He did a project as a kid on Ernest Hemingway and saw a picture of him smoking a cigar and hunting a shark with a machine gun that lit a fire

In December 2018, he got the idea for Rugged Legacy and launched it in early 2019

He didn’t want to work for anyone else

He had to learn copywriting so his business wouldn’t die

Then, he started teaching people how to do it

Wrote two books, and he reads all the time

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Working on a novel and is about 1/3rd complete

Most people suck at writing so they pay him to write

Now 99% of his income comes from writing for others

He focused on Twitter rather than building a “personal brand”

He got so busy with work that he didn’t have the time or interest in building a brand

He no longer promotes himself online

People know who he is

He has a great network now

He has some coaching clients

He wakes up at five am, takes his huskie for a walk, gets some coffee, reads for four hours, then starts his day writing for clients

Vince Flynn/Mitch Rapp series

Jack Reacher series by Lee Child

Loves Musashi by Eiji Yoshikawa

Will reference a business book but doesn’t sit and read them

Does not like the appeal of the “digital nomad” lifestyle

He doesn’t want to live out of seven suitcases

He spent nearly five years hustling and grinding and perfecting his writing craft

A customer of his asked him if he’d help with their website, and that became his first paying copywriting client, but he was visible and active online and on Twitter, so they knew him

He Googled typical prices for copywriting and added 20% to that

Then he raised his prices until people balked, and then he dropped his prices 5%

He’ll include three revisions, but the fourth is 50% of the original invoice

He doesn’t design websites, but he writes the copy

He loves writing long-form content like 80-page white papers

He’ll write 16k-20k words every ten days or so

Many people confuse niche and industry

He can research any industry and write about it

A Web 3 startup paid him $60k upfront ($5k/mo) to do all of their content, and he had no experience in that space

The Web 3 client saw an article Jeff wrote on marriage and reached out to him

If clients are jerks, he cuts them loose

He charges 6-7 cents per word

He just does words

He uses AI as a style guide by uploading something like a five-paragraph description the client provides

“Additionally…in a fast-paced world…”

He loves 3-piece suits

Anchoring…

He’ll sometimes wear his suit to write to anchor himself

“Okay”

Zuby

“I’m a serious Catholic”

Adoration and Holy Hours and Mass

He carries his rosary always

He has Catholic cigars, Incensum Cigars

He converted to Catholicism last year

There are only 450 TLM churches in the U.S.

His wife is Hispanic who grew up in New England and is Catholic

He spent 18 months writing a book on Catholic masculinity

He decided to go to Mass May 7, 2023, which was two months after he launched the book

His wife was a lapsed Catholic, but now they go weekly

He’s in RCIA and entering the Catholic Church fully this Easter

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[herespaaa]

How to Choose the Perfect Haircut: Your Ultimate Guide | HereSpa

Choosing the perfect haircut can be an exciting and transformative experience. Your hairstyle plays a significant role in defining your personal style and enhancing your overall appearance. 

Whether you're looking for a subtle change or a bold new look, finding the right haircut that suits your face shape, hair type, and lifestyle is crucial. 

In this blog post, we'll guide you through the process of choosing the perfect haircut, helping you achieve a hairstyle that makes you look and feel fabulous.

Determine Your Face Shape: Understanding your face shape is essential when selecting a flattering haircut. The common face shapes include oval, round, square, heart, and diamond. Each shape has its own unique characteristics, and certain haircuts can complement or balance them. Identify your face shape by pulling your hair back and examining your hairline, jawline, and cheekbones. Online face shape guides or consultation with a professional hairstylist can provide further assistance.

Research Hairstyle Ideas: Once you've identified your face shape, gather inspiration for potential hairstyles that suit you. Browse fashion magazines, online hairstyle galleries, and social media platforms for haircut ideas. Consider factors such as your hair texture, thickness, and length. Save pictures of styles that catch your attention to show your hairstylist later, facilitating effective communication.

Consider Your Hair Type: Understanding your hair type is crucial when choosing a haircut that will be manageable and enhance your hair's natural beauty. Hair can be straight, wavy, curly, or coily, and each type has specific considerations. For example, if you have thick, curly hair, you may want a style that reduces volume and enhances your natural curls. On the other hand, if you have fine, straight hair, you might prefer a cut that adds texture and volume.

Evaluate Your Lifestyle: Consider your lifestyle when choosing a haircut that suits your needs. Are you someone who likes to spend minimal time on styling your hair, or do you enjoy experimenting with various looks? If you're always on the go or prefer low-maintenance styles, opt for haircuts that are easy to style and maintain. Alternatively, if you're willing to invest time in styling, you can consider more intricate or high-maintenance hairstyles.

Seek Professional Advice: Consulting with a professional hairstylist is invaluable when it comes to selecting the perfect haircut. A skilled stylist can analyze your face shape, hair type, and lifestyle and suggest styles that will complement your features and suit your needs. They can also provide guidance on maintenance and recommend products to help you achieve your desired look.

Consider Haircut Maintenance: Before finalizing your haircut choice, think about the long-term maintenance required. Shorter hairstyles often require more frequent trips to the salon for trims, while longer styles may require more attention to keep them healthy and vibrant. Be realistic about your commitment to maintenance and select a haircut that aligns with your preferences and schedule. And if going to a salon is becoming a hassle, booking an at-home salon service with HereSpa is your first choice!

Experiment and Embrace Change: Remember, hair grows back, and experimenting with different hairstyles can be fun and liberating. Don't be afraid to try something new and embrace change. Your hair is a versatile accessory that allows you to express your personality and style, so enjoy the process of finding the perfect haircut that makes you feel confident and beautiful.

Choosing the perfect haircut involves considering factors such as face shape, hair type, lifestyle, and personal preferences. 

By understanding these elements and seeking professional guidance, you can find a hairstyle that flatters your features and complements your individuality. Explore options, gather inspiration, and experiment. Remember, the perfect haircut is the one that makes you feel confident and reflects your unique style. Ready to get that perfect haircut? Book an at-home salon service with HereSpa today!

[femmefatalevibe]

Femme Fatale Guide: How To Reset From A Toxic Work Environment

Give yourself ample time to reset and indulge in basic self-care. Get a full night's sleep every night, eat a balanced & nutritious diet (most of the time) with meals you enjoy, incorporate daily movement & a consistent exercise routine into your week, read books, listen to music and podcasts that inspire you, hang out with loved ones/people who energize you, indulge in beauty routines/"spa" days and movies/TV shows you love

Once you feel recharged/not burned out anymore, take a step back and reflect on what your values are, your interests, desired lifestyle/workplace environment that best suits your personality and work style. Consider what you want out of your next opportunity instead of letting hiring managers decide for you once your interviewing processes begin. Remember, a job at a company should feel like a mutual fit. Decide to work as an employee, not a corporate slave.

Reassess and decide on your future workplace boundaries ahead of time. Once you're more emotionally distant from your current toxic work environment, allow yourself to act as a neutral observer of the interpersonal dynamics that played out while you were working in your (soon-to-be previous) toxic work environment. Consider any warning signs/red flags you might've ignored early on or certain ways you allowed yourself to be a pushover/people-pleaser to keep the peace while getting to know your co-workers. Looking back, how would you have handled these situations if you had the clarity and self-confidence you have now? Use your answer to this question as a roadmap to decide how you can show up as your best self before/while working in your next role.

Determine ways you can forge workplace connections early on in your next role. Embrace the "new job, new you" mentality here and decide how you want to show up as a sociable co-worker from your first week onward. Greet your team in the morning, engage in some small talk over a break to get to know each other better – try to find mutual interest/express interest in what they're saying, make it a priority to schedule one-on-ones with all team members/close collaborators within your company over the first month, invite co-workers to get coffee/lunch with you a couple of days per week, etc.

[bobdylan-n-jonimitchell]

Announcing "Archives—Volume 3: The Asylum Years (1972-1975)

Come 1972, Joni Mitchell’s singular songwriting talent and poetic gifts were undeniable. Fresh off the back-to-back Platinum-certified releases of 1970’s Ladies of the Canyon and 1971’s Blue — totemic albums whose artfulness and ubiquity would influence generations of songwriters — Mitchell had grown wary of mounting media scrutiny. Everything from her style choices to romantic partners became the subject of far more gossip column inches than were ever dedicated to the lifestyle minutiae of her male counterparts.

In response, she had pulled back, announcing an early retirement from the stage in 1970 and moving to the quiet expanses of British Columbia’s Sunshine Coast. It was a fruitful change of scenery. Inspired by her proximity to nature and refreshed by the peaceful seclusion, she began constructing the songs that would become For The Roses. This respite thrust Mitchell into a remarkably fertile creative period, yielding a run of albums — 1972’s For The Roses, 1974’s Court And Spark, and 1975’s The Hissing Of Summer Lawns — that would simultaneously expand and refine the scope of her music. Her adventurous, intricate arrangements and growing formidability as a bandleader injected these songs with a clarity of purpose, a potent muscularity, and a sense of possibility — it is among the most exciting eras of a near peerless career.

This era comes into even greater focus on Joni Mitchell Archives, Vol. 3: The Asylum Years (1972-1975), out October 6, 2023 on Rhino Records. It’s the latest entry in Rhino’s ongoing, GRAMMY-winning series exploring the vast untapped archives of rare Joni Mitchell recordings — a project guided intimately by Mitchell’s own vision and personal touch. Joni Mitchell Archives, Vol. 3: The Asylum Years (1972-1975) will be available both in a 5CD / digital version and a 4LP cut-down version, both with an accompanying book featuring photos and a conversation about this period between Joni Mitchell and longtime friend Cameron Crowe.