#like sure even if you DO accept that only the rich should live in the city......... who tf is going to serve them? 🤨🤨🤨🤨

[clonewarsahsoka]

Just saw a post on insta that was making a joke about how houses in Canada (cities) cost like 2 million and are not even good and the comments are like "just dont live in Vancouver or Toronto" "leave the cities" "move to alberta" like do you HEAR yourself????????

[kalims]

ㅤhere is my husband

premise. just us casually staking a claim on our non-official husbands (for coupons)

featuring. all characters

content. alignment, fluff

ㅤthe flustered over thinkers

one who's unbearably confused because he doesn't recall a marriage taking place to wed the two of you at all, he's a little concerned though. he's sure he'd remember such an event? anything with the two of you is practically unforgettable to the fact that when he's in bed only thing he thinks about is you, and the lingering anticipation that he'll see you again in the morning.

besides this said... eventful morning. where you've both apparently upgraded in relationship without his knowledge he can say that he's struggling to hide his steaming ears, hoping you won't notice if he brings the cup of coffee to his face so the steam seems like it's from there.

confused? flustered? thanks for the input! here's your boyfriend husband. doesn't even ask you to explain even though he's twitching to ask you cause if he knows you then you're almost always up to no good, maybe this is one of your tricks but he won't try just for the thought that you're still 'married.' all marriage related things, even the color white is sending his mind into overwire :)

— | riddle, jack, deuce, azul, epel, silver

ㅤwe love flirts

ah yes, if we've got the flustered, confused husbands we also need to get our resident flirts who just gives you a side glance and plays along like he knows what game you're playing. absolutely no questions at all because you know he's gonna bring up the topic sooner or later with a tease, he just feels like he has to return the fluster you'd admittedly inflicted on him. (which is apparently by proclaiming you're both married now.)

don't be surprised if you're getting private messages online, or just random people coming up to you asking how you're married in... this golden age, was that even legal there? you're not sure but maybe because everyone was kind of casual about it.

doesn't matter whether you say you're just messing with him. oh, you're done? good for you but he isn't. he's calling you his spouse everywhere, a local restaurant, shop, stall. wherever you say, he claims he's just doing what you asked for the coupons but you've got an inkling he's just got a knack for calling you his lawfully wedded partner.

— | trey, cater, jade, rook, lilia, leona (partly), vil

ㅤlegally in denial

we have the awkward ones who partially accept their fates, the flirts who's living purpose is to get a rise of warmth in your face, and we have the legally in denial ones whom are trying so hard to deny everything you do. you guys are dating?! oh my god... you must be being threatened to do this, where's the culprit?! news flash, there isn't any but even when it's so clear they seem to find every single reason to convince themselves that there's something wrong.

like, please accept our love already. you already called them your husband in broad daylight, is that not enough of proof? what do you mean you're probably gonna divorce him... he doesn't mention the fact of you guys never marrying at all, just jumps in divorce...

sometimes you should punch a man for his self esteem, it must be a struggle trying to convince someone you like, that you indeed like them. crazy, right? he can't take this heart stopping gesture he's watched too many times but will gladly arrange a wedding in minecraft. just tell him you guys got married ever since he put his bed next to yours if he asks since when.

— | idia on his own

ㅤairheads who are simps

the classic group of guys, of which they all are just incredibly down bad for the lead who just so happens to be you! <4 in this case they're so in love that they wouldn't even question anything you say even if you mix up murder and a name in the same sentence! if you trip? oh no, no. it's clearly the fault of the ground, not to worry! he'll even get workers to reconstruct the entire thing.

and yes, he's either rich or has enough influence (if not through intimidation.) anyways, if they're mad because of a horrible day just walk in a room and then the dark cloud over their heads just floats away and is replaced by hearts in their eyes.

a prank? oh you're funny. what ever do you mean? you're both clearly married. he's got the papers right here *materializes one.* where did that even come from?! say it once, now you've planted something that won't go away in their heads and it's going to shift to reality one way or another :)

— | kalim, floyd, malleus, rook.

ㅤchill mister tsunderes

takes a deep breath* screeches* yeah that's pretty much it. the people (possibly pertaining to just one person, cause he almost always needs his own category.) who try to refuse your existing even if you just cough. keyword: try because even if you're dating them they're still struggling to wrap their head around the fact that they are dating you so maybe their coping mechanism is just refusing to admit you make their hearts go boom boom??

is completely torn whether to screech again (preferably not in his mind to release that pent up... feeling. some type of fluster that makes him wonder if he should have brought a pillow to yell into.) or just reject what you just said. somehow his mouth just doesn't cooperate and he has to look away from you because he's actually struggling to keep his sanity together.

giving himself pep talk, the fortitude that 'he doesn't like you', trying to rebuild that wall back up again but he learns that he apparently can't take it when you're both referred to a life bounded vow. not as in he despises is, though he believes he is. but rather because he'll probably combust on the spot by the sheer claim being said out loud.

— | main: sebek, leona, ace

ㅤdem smug bastards

the ones who just can't resist to crack a smirk when you casually introduce him as your husband, no wonder you insisted he wore the promise ring you had given him.. just to show him off? consider him impressed! this might be just one of his favorite memento of your shenanigans. either he already knows what you're up do (leona) or he's just enjoying the remnants of your embarrassed face as he plummets you with endless grins and teases (floyd)

he's your husband...? I mean true but you're mainly his spouse :) should you even regret having done anything in the first place for the coupons? don't ever. anything should be done for the discounts, even if your supposed husband starts parading everywhere and uses every opportunity that appears in random conversations or situations to just casually announce your lawfully wedded marriage.

what do you mean you're not married? I mean he's got all the evidence in his phone, you didn't think he'd pass up the opportunity to record you saying that phrase for nothing did you? it's a great moment to remember, especially when it's in the middle of the night and he can't help but pull up that recording just to listen to it on loop like an idiot.

— | leona, floyd, ruggie, jade?, lilia (perhaps, vil (also questionable)

ㅤwho are you talking to rn?

those who look embarrassed but you're betting most on your money that he's just awfully flustered + doesn't like the feeling just guessing from him avoiding your eyes like you're the entity from bird box. does he really think his hood can cover the entirety of his red ears? they're fooling absolutely no one with that fake cough, only thing you heard was the quiet choke when they processed your words.

tries to play it off by 'composing' themselves in front of you, even though their back is turned to you. the straightening of their shoulder usually implies that they think they're ready but you can't help but note that several parts of their body, if not all, collectively flinch at the sight of you. they dont say anything but they give you this... look.

like, narrowed eyes, their jaw is slightly turned away from you, *judges whole existence with a side eye* they can't believe they even have you as a partner but besides that they can't wrap their heads around the fact that such a stupid notion such as that actually had him doing cartwheels inside his head.

— | jamil deserves this, ruggie, jack, azul

ㅤwym didn't we already get married?

YOUR HONOR ITS THIS ONE. you're probably making him more confused than you are. because?? cue confused face. didn't you guys already get married like, a month ago? do you not see the ring on your finger? the matching one on his own finger? did you really not notice anything when he just casually takes you to the most ethereal, sacred place of briar valley and hands you the box containing the ring...? has he done it too subtly? well, he's underestimated humans once again...

to fae culture that was probably the most obvious thing ever. he didn't outright just decide he wanted to marry you, but you've probably done something that borders on a 'let's get married' proposal in his culture so that just prompted him to get to work ASAP, get his workers find the most grandest ring there is in his family heirloom.

if you take it. that just meant you're both FOR LIFERSSSSS. HENCE WHY HES SO CONFUSED WHEN YOU'RE CONFUSED THAT HES ACTING LIKE ITS NORMAL. I mean he's happy that you finally decided to call him his rightful title after a month but why are you so flabbergasted, child of man? what do you mean you're not married? just look at said sacred, ethereal place in briar valley. both your names are engraved there together, that's enough proof isn't it?

— | malleus

bonus <4

ㅤthe actual partner in crime

want to take it up a notch? just call the resident creator of forged documents, this is totally legal and free! just get on his good side and he will remain there forever, unchanging cause he loves you now. unless you somehow wrong him... it's actually very beneficial because he can do nearly anything for you without trouble so... wow you're married? why didn't you invite him :( oh you're not but you want to be? oh that's totally fine!

oh you want his help? he can't go against the law because of his coding system but.. it also says to help friends whenever he can and you're his best friend so :)) *casually prints out paper* don't worry he'll talk to some friends and it will be legal before you know it!

knowing his brother he's probably authorized to break the law so he had to code it himself before he gets too far... anyways congrats on your actual marriage 😊

— | ortho

note. this is a commissioned piece, do not post this anywhere else

[milkloafy]

THE DUTIES OF A BODYGUARD — JIYAN

⋆｡˚ ❀ summary: jiyan never does an assignment half-assed. accepting a job as your bodyguard means being there to protect you at all times.  ⋆｡˚ ❀ contents: bodyguard au, modern au, fem!reader, reader is a rich gorl, spoiled but like aware?, almost nudity, 17+ ⋆｡˚ ❀ wc: 1.2k ⋆｡˚ ❀ a/n: inspired by creativepromptsforwriting’s bodyguard prompts :> red flag!reader kinda LMAO she’s very diff compared to how i normally write them but yk what don’t we all wanna pretend we’re a spoiled rich bitch with a hot bodyguard sometimes?this reader would 1000% drive jiyan crazy but like in the best way yk vibes u.u 

There were few individuals who truly needed bodyguards, in your humble opinion. 

Not the president of whatever country, not the elderly monarchs that should be abolished, not billionaires who made their money exploiting the vulnerable. For all you cared, most of those people were entitled assholes who didn’t need to be protected. 

The only people who deserved bodyguards were those under great threat. And sure, the powerful and influential people could be in danger as well. But frankly, you still didn’t care about them. 

And, naturally, when your wealthy father told you he hired a bodyguard for you, you were suspicious. As far as you knew, you weren’t under any threat. Your family wasn’t even multimillionaire status. Just a few millions… 

Certainly not enough to warrant much attention or animosity that your safety was in question. You were only the heiress of a multimillion dollar company. Most of your friends were as well. It was nothing too out of the ordinary in your circle.

You thought having a personal bodyguard was useless and immediately spoke out against your parents when they mentioned they would hire one for you, though none of your complaints were listened to by your family, of course. 

Unfortunately, those complaints melted away when you saw your bodyguard. 

His long, blue hair was tied up in a ponytail on the back of his head and you immediately thought of how fun it looked to play with. His golden eyes drew you in with his serious stare. The tight black fit of his clothes hugged every defined muscle on his arms and abdomen, and you felt yourself staring for just a little too long. 

You met his gaze and the corner of your mouth quirked mischievously when you saw him eyeing you as well. 

“This is your new bodyguard, Jiyan,” introduced your father. “He is to accompany you everywhere, understood? And please, do not try to scare this one off.”

You smiled dryly, shrugging in response. It wasn’t as if your words mattered much around here. At least this time, your bodyguard was handsome enough to look at. Maybe you could even have some fun with him. 

At least, that was your thought before you realized Jiyan took your father’s words very literally. 

He accompanied you back to your apartment—up to the penthouse suite, of course. And you showed him an open guest room for him to stay at if need be. However, he didn’t stop at the living room or common areas like you had expected. Jiyan followed you even as you entered your room. 

As he slid through the door behind you, you gave him a questioning look. 

“Can I help you?” you asked, voice higher than normal. 

He shook his head. “No, I’m only here doing my job.”

“Your job?” you echoed. “Does being my bodyguard entail you being with me no matter where I go?”

Jiyan nodded without the slightest bit of hesitation. “Yes. As your father said, I need to be in the room with you at all times.”

He said that with such sincerely you almost giggled. You were certain he was taking the job too literally, but as you noticed the darkness outside your window, you decided you could mess around with him for a bit. 

“At all times?” you asked with a raised brow.

“That is correct.” 

With an exaggerated sigh, you shrugged. “Suit yourself.” 

When Jiyan didn’t reply, you began taking off your shirt, unfastening the pearl buttons adorning the front. With each button, you revealed more and more skin, from the curve of your breasts to the softness of your stomach. Without turning around to hide yourself, you slipped the sleeves off your shoulders and let the light pink, tweed jacket fall to the floor. 

Jiyan’s expression did not visibly change, but the color of his ears sure did. They were tinged a pretty red and you felt almost bad for teasing him. 

“Are you sure you want to stay in my room at all times, Mr. Bodyguard?”

He cleared his throat, keeping his eyes on you but ensuring his gaze never dropped below your face. The self-control of a true bodyguard, you complimented in your head. 

“Is this what your father cautioned against when he said not to scare your new bodyguard off?” retorted Jiyan, answering your question with one of his own. “Is this a common recurrence?”

You shook your head and made a face. “Ew. Never. The last guy was too old and not my type.” 

Jiyan’s lip quirked up—the first time you ever noticed his expression change—before it returned to its normal position. “As opposed to me…?”

“Someone who doesn’t look old enough to be my great-uncle and is very much my type,” you confirmed. “Now, if you’ll excuse me, I still have to finish getting undressed for bed.” 

You stood there in front of him in only a bra, a tweed skirt—matching your top that was discarded on the floor, naturally—and thin stockings. Slowly, you unzipped the side of your skirt and paused before it actually fell to the ground. 

“Are you sure you don’t want to step away now?” you said, hesitancy creeping up on you for the first time as your fingers toyed with the clasp of your bra. While you didn’t mind Jiyan seeing you like this, you didn’t actually want to make him uncomfortable. You had some morals, after all. “No one is forcing you to go this far to protect me. I promise, you’d still be an amazing, father-approved bodyguard if you just stayed outside my room and only came to check in on me frequently…”

“I never do my job halfway,” he said firmly. “Unfortunately, with the information your father briefed me with, you never know what could lurk outside, and I am here to ensure your safety at all times. Still, I assure you I do not feel forced to watch. I could have offered to turn around while you changed. If I wanted to.”

“So you’re just being a pervert, then?” you teased. 

“Says the one stripping in front of a stranger with no hesitation. Perhaps next time you should reconsider such actions.”

“You’re not a complete stranger,” you said, finally letting your short skirt fall to the floor. Innocently, you bent over to collect your dirty clothes and place them in the hamper for the maid to take care of. “You’re my bodyguard now, and a hot one at that.” 

Jiyan closed his eyes for a brief moment, trying to rid his mind of any indecent thoughts he may have. “Do you need to say bodyguard in such a way that makes it sound…salacious?” 

Moving closer, you batted your lashes as you peered up at him. “That’s just how I normally say it.” 

He sighed and muttered under his breath, “I’m here to protect you from any danger, but what about the danger you’ll pose to me?”

You laughed, not disagreeing with his words. Instead, you placed a gentle hand on his bicep and Jiyan straightened in surprise before reciprocating with his own palm on your exposed lower back.

“It’s a good thing my father will never have to know.”

[chriscamopants]

I mean it // homewrecker Matt

Summary: in which Matt is only friends with a guy because he really wants his girlfriend…

Author’s notes: I do not condone cheating, nor is it an acceptable thing to do to anyone, so again if you don’t like it, don’t read it. However, if Matt Sturniolo came up to me one day and offered to steal me away from a current boyfriend… I would not hesitate to take my clothes off on the spot. I rest my case.

Warnings: smut . cheating plot . degradation . praise dom Matt x sub fem reader . mentions of drinking + smoking . mentions of drugs . hair pulling if you squint

“She wears a ring? Came through without it, you really think she stays true? I doubt it, because I am fucking your girlfriend and there’s nothing you can do about it” - I mean it, G-Eazy

‘Yeah but Matt’s a dick…’

You shrug at your friend’s pointed comment, swishing around the last half of the strange alcoholic mixer that had been thrust into your hand the minute you had walked through the door.

Both of you stand to the side of the noisy, open living room area whilst your backs lean against the cold wallpaper of some rich kid’s penthouse.

‘Yeah… I know’

‘I could literally list all of the things wrong with him on my fingers and I would run out of them. I don’t even know why your boyfriend chooses to be friends with him’. She continues, taking a sip of her own drink whilst you stare off into the distance, mostly looking over to the opposite side of the room where a ping pong table has been set out and both the boyfriend in question and Matt - the subject of your degrading conversation - are playing in a heated game of beer pong.

‘I’m not sure either’

‘He’s a womaniser with literally no respect for anyone around him, he’s a narcissist, and he’s just constantly rude to people.’ She continues to rant aimlessly, her very large hoop earrings jingling as she shakes her head and denies someone who was offering her a selection of ecstasy pills on a silver platter.

The person doesn’t seem to care for the denial and instead shrugs his shoulders before moving on to pester the next highly intoxicated person, coaxing them into falling even more inebriated by placing the tempting round pill into the palm of their open hand.

She then starts again, waving her hands about dramatically whilst you secretly get lost in your own thoughts.

‘You should have heard what he said the other day about a random girl who passed us on the sidewalk, if I-’ but then her voice slowly fades into the distance the more you focus in on Ryan, who stands next to a Matt that cheers him on whilst he aims a ping pong ball up to throw it into one of the cups opposite them.

Matt wears a baggy dark green zip up hoodie that looks almost black in the flashing red LED lights of the room as weed smoke blows up into the air in thick plumes, like tiny little volcanos releasing their clouds of ash.

Suddenly, your heart squeezes strangely and you find yourself beginning to blush in embarrassment when Matt senses someone staring at him and so flicks his eyes over to you. He has his hands tucked into his hoodie pockets and wears a cheeky little smile on his face that puckers even more after he deflects his eyes to the back of Ryan’s head. He then looks back at you and makes a face, as if to playfully scold you for staring.

You bet he finds all of this so funny. The fact that you are looking at him instead of Ryan.

It immediately makes you feel bad, because you know that if you bump into Matt later tonight, he is most definitely going to bring this up just to tease you about it. However, something within the look of his eyes makes you inwardly squirm. Or maybe it’s the way his smirk suites his face so attractively…

But then you come to the conclusion that it is neither of those things, because what it really is, is the way he inconspicuously lifts his middle and pointer fingers up to split them at either side of his mouth and 'scratch his face’ whilst making direct eye contact with you.

He’s got a pair of fucking balls to innocently mimic the dirty joke of eating someone out, you’ll give him that. Whether it is intentional or not, it still makes you screw up your face in disgust and avert your eyes, to which Matt smiles in victory before re-joining the conversation that is being shared around the ping pong table at his end.

His lower half isn’t visible as he stands behind a Ryan that holds a cup in his hand already whilst his other one lets go of a white ball. Everyone watches it bounce to the other side of the table before it neatly splashes into one of the opposition’s cups.

People cheer for Ryan whilst the other random guy groans with his head thrown back. He playfully points at Ryan and Matt, saying something before he swipes up the shot and knocks it back with a screwed up face of disgust.

They’re probably all drinking the equivalent of burning gasoline in those vile, non-diluted drinks. And judging by the way Matt and Ryan have polished off quite a few of the cups on their side already, it’s clear that they must have come to get absolutely shit-faced at this party.

You secretly roll your eyes and nod along as you hum, pretending to listen to a word your friend is saying before another random girl who - your guess, knows her - comes up to chat.

This gives you an excuse to slip out of her eye-line.

Matt.

Aka, the asshole of all assholes, however… also more fondly known as ‘your boyfriend’s best friend’.

It’s not like what your friend says isn’t true, because all of it is. He is a womaniser, he is a narcissist, and he most definitely is disrespectful to everyone most of the time. In fact, Matt sometimes scares you. You don’t like opening your mouth in front of him at all, nor should anyone else, because no matter what is being said, he’ll still manage to be rude about it.

To say he is a fucking bully is an understatement. He’s the kind of person that will snigger at a guy in glasses and whisper about his appearance after he has passed by to his friends or trip up someone in the school hallways ‘by accident’, only to then watch their folders go flying for the fun of it. He is mean and unpleasant, and quite frankly a terrible influence on Ryan.

Plus, annoyingly, as your friend also points out, Matt loves girls, and he loves the attention he receives from them, because he knows he’s hot. Which doesn’t bother you at all, because you’re with Ryan. But what does concern you however, is that more often than not, you catch Matt looking at you in ways that clearly shouldn’t be allowed, especially since he knows that you are taken. No less taken by his best friend.

They are subtle, and he always immediately looks away after you catch him, but usually with no regret in his eyes and sometimes even with little conniving smirks on his face as though you are both sharing a little inside joke.

Ryan is as clueless as ever of course, he trusts too many people, and only ever really sees the best in Matt. He refuses to believe that Matt could be using his friendship for something else entirely. Because unfortunately, sometimes guy are only friends with other guys because they really want their girlfriends.

And lately… Matt has been absolutely oozing those vibes. Sometimes, you get inwardly pissed at Ryan for not realising the obvious signs, because Matt really doesn’t make it discreet. At all.

It always starts with the stupid shit like looking over at his phone whilst he’s texting Matt to arrange a hang out time, only to see Matt replying with an oh-so-innocent ‘oh cool, will ur gf be there?’ as a sneaky way of making sure that you’ll be around.

Either that or it’s him making blatantly flirty remarks, right in front of Ryan.

Stupidly… most of the time all of these go over Ryan’s head and you just have to roll your eyes at him.

The other thing that also leads you to this conclusion is the very worrying fact that you know Matt has a clear track record of being a notorious homewrecker. It’s like… his thing.

He loves pursuing something that people tell him is actually out of his reach. He loves being able to feel like he can touch the untouchable. And here he is, best friends with Ryan, but only because Ryan has a girlfriend… you.

Someone that he maybe- possibly? To your recollection… wants to fuck.

But that’s just your take on it, and it might not even be true, who knows what actually goes on in the complicated weave of Matt’s mind.

Heading further into the haze of the party, you stroll about, practically choking on the smell of sweat, perfume, nicotine and weed. Not to mention the fact that you almost get crushed in between the grinding body parts of people as their skin brushes and presses up against your own.

You trip up on your feet a couple of times and find it pretty hard to breathe in amongst all of the party goers as you barge your way through the claustrophobically intense crowd that flashes generic neon party colours of red, blue and green from the installed lights above.

Your ears ring and your head thumps at the sound of the tasteless rap music still playing, so you decide to do what any normal person would and go up the stairs to find an unoccupied room where you can just lie down and have some peace and quiet. You’re sure the guy throwing this rager has a couple to spare, even if in some of them people have already gone to fuck.

You’re not too drunk to have lost your grip on what is actually going on around you… you can still think straight, however, you’re not exactly stone cold sober either. So, you wobble your way up the stairs and then walk along the corridor, having to try a few rooms before finding a nice empty one.

Sitting down on the plush double bed you sigh. However, in your intoxicated state, you don’t quite realise that the light to the bathroom suite is on and that someone else is also shuffling around on the other side of the door.

Who that someone is, is only made apparent to you after the bathroom door unlocks and he comes stepping out whilst flicking off the light switch.

You quite literally freeze, and part of you thinks you get so much of a fright that you sober up a little when you gaze upon a full bodied Matt standing in the darkened doorway of the bathroom.

Oh…

Matt looks equally as caught off-guard as you as he narrows his eyes.

‘What are you doing in here?’ You stupidly announce, as if it is your own private room that he is in. He rolls his eyes and scoffs, his usual clipped tone being exercised on you as he responds with a sharp ‘I’m just looking around, jesus it’s not like it’s your bathroom’.

You gulp and shake your head in understanding, inwardly scolding yourself on the idiocy of what you had just said. Trying not to stumble upon your words the next time around you keep your eyes trained on him as he marches across the room to have a nose at some of the pictures hanging up on the walls. Now, your hands are shakily white knuckling the bedsheets… fuck, you can’t just leave! That would be weird.

You don’t have to start speaking again however, because Matt does it for you.

‘So why are you up here by yourself? Thought you would have been begging for Ry’s attention by now’. You can feel his smirk through the back of his fucking head.

Pretty much everything that comes out of this man’s mouth makes your blood sear hotly within your veins. Who the fuck does he think he is to say something like that about you?

‘Well I’m not am I?’

This is the only good comeback you can manage to think of and bite back in the time that he gives you. He is already starting to make your hands shake with nervousness.

His back is turned, but he always somehow manages to command your attention.

‘Yeah I guess so’ he shrugs, but then starts an annoying chuckle as he suddenly looks over his shoulder at your body sitting meekly on the bed, his jawline still as sharp as ever and protruding from his neck. ‘Seems like instead you’re looking for my attention then huh?’.

The quipped hum that travels from his throat makes you flush a cherry pink, and you struggle to keep up with his wit since you get nervous about the way he looks at you and the way he commands himself. ‘Oh really, and what gave you that impression?’. But immediately after you say this you wish you could take it back, because Matt swivels on his feet as though you had walked directly into a trap of his own making.

Which to be honest, you kind of had…

‘Well for one, you’re in here… with me. And two, you just couldn’t seem to keep your eyes off of me earlier… and that’s not really supposed to be what loving girlfriends do’ he pouts his lips and tilts his head meanly, already psychologically bullying you because of how much you had looked at him earlier at the ping pong table in comparison to Ryan.

This time you directly roll your eyes at him and decide to get back up from your position on the bed. At least now you feel like you’re not at a loss for power due to the height difference. You don’t like the way that it’s too easy for him to completely tower over you from your spot on the patterned bed covers.

You can tell that Matt is also a little tipsy based off of the way he sways a little as he stands still, but just like yourself, it’s not enough alcohol to make him completely lose his grip on reality and who you are. So why is it, that he looks at you as though you are a hunk of fresh meat up for grabs?

Suddenly he looks away, taking a deep breath and reaching his hand to the nightstand next to the bed. He swipes up the book resting on top of it, and then slowly reads out the title of the classical novel. ‘The Lover’s Den… it’s one of those must reads isn’t it?’ He asks, still with the added patronising tone that never fails to tick you off.

Your skin feels itchy, and you want nothing more than to run out of this room and away from Matt’s presence, because his attitude really affects you in the strangest of ways. ‘Sure I guess…’ you shift awkwardly, trying to keep your answers as brief as possible.

You wish he would just put the book down, but instead he flips it around and starts to read the blurb.

‘An erotic romance filled with dark twists and a lover’s secret…’.

As he speaks these words your heart plummets into your ass. Next come his hooded eyes that flick up to yours and narrow impishly.

Please just let this be over.

You don’t want to be around Matt any more than you can help it, for conflicting reasons. If before you weren’t sure if whether or not he wanted to fuck you, now you’re pretty much certain he did.

You just hate the way that he is so critical about you, and how he can easily make you feel shy and embarrassed about yourself.

Matt is really attractive, almost unfairly attractive, which just makes you feel sick to your stomach about how often your feelings fight with one another when discussing the concepts of right and wrong. Because you shouldn’t be thinking about that at all, especially when you’re in a supposedly “loving” relationship with Ryan- that transforms into a less loving relationship with every single step Matt takes to get to your heaving figure.

By now he has dropped the book and it’s flopped quietly back down onto the mattress, the suggestive pages of the erotica long forgotten by Matt in favour of him getting to what he really wants… you.

‘Aren’t you a little tired of your relationship?’ He gently starts, as if trying to take on the tone of some kind of marriage counsellor. Your heart squeezes as little paper butterflies make their way around the step ladders of your rib cage.

Oh fuck, how the hell are you supposed to respond to that?

You end up simply keeping your lips sealed in shock. Instead, you opt to nervously gulp a drop of your saliva down your scratchy throat as one of your feet naturally takes a step back from his advancing body.

‘Maybe you want to explore a little before you tie any proper knots with your boyfriend no…?’

Matt has reached you now, and as a natural reaction you simply freeze in your spot of one foot stepped behind the other, your heart still galloping and your eyes blinking up at him widely.

As you begin to stutter, Matt’s mouth peels up into a satisfied smirk with his jawline sharp and his hot breath dispersing directly onto your face because of just how close he is. In fact, he’s so close that you can see the small little pores where his dark stubble grows in to shape his beard.

‘Y’know I like exploring too… a lot…’

His voice reduces to nothing more than a mere whisper now as his face gets incomprehensibly closer to yours. Your hands lay limp by your sides, that is, until Matt slowly gravitates his veined ones forward to pinch your softer skin in between his rougher, more masculine grip whilst his thumbs rub temptingly over the flesh that conjoins your pointer fingers to your thumbs.

Your breath is shaky and audible as Matt falls into a hushed quiet, taking your own silence as permission to press his lips against yours.

Something within your brain sounds a shrieking siren that screams ‘RYAN! RYAN! RYAN!’ Over and over again as Matt’s soft lips enclose over yours with a gentle victory that he treats cautiously at first. He’s buttering you up with his tender caresses and soothing voice, knowing exactly how to play to your weaknesses since he’s had practice at swinging sledgehammers at other people’s happy relationships before.

But, unfortunately for Matt, the little nagging voice of Ryan inside of your head succeeds.

Bile almost rises in your throat as reality comes to slap you in the face. You’re knocked out of Matt’s bewitching trance and are absolutely horrified as to what you are doing with him whilst your boyfriend is most likely located just down the stairs from the two of you.

Ripping yourself away, you jump back in terror and leave Matt to open his eyes and blink them, his lips already swollen with arousal before his hand comes up to smoosh against them in a vampiric manner. He then rubs away any saliva that might have oozed from out of his mouth as though he were swiping away blood.

Shaking your head in silence, you once again have practically no words to utter and instead spin on your heels. Making a beeline straight to the door, you leave Matt’s sexual aura behind, his presence and strong smell of aftershave still polluting your nose and playing with your senses before you grasp a hold of the doorknob and slip outside.

However, regrettably, you don’t leave Matt standing alone in the centre of the room for long, because as quickly as you had closed the door right in his face, you are shyly cracking it back open again and sliding into the room with a guilty grimace once more.

Matt only stands there with his arms crossed and a smug fucking smile on his face, the dim bedside table lamp lighting up both of your complexions with a yellowish lustre. It’s as if he knew that you wouldn’t be gone for long - which to be fair, was right - but it still irked you to admit it.

With a final swallow, you put a signature on an imaginary infidelity contract whilst standing meekly a couple of strides away from him. Fiddling with your hands self-consciously, you voice a curious but soft ‘tell me more…’.

Matt’s shoulders rise and his chest expands with a satisfied sigh, knowing that he has won and absolutely loving it in the process.

Walking up to you, his feet pad quietly on the carpet whilst your breaths once again mingle with one another. Regrettably, you feel now that the heartbeat is not just within your chest, but also in between your legs as Matt easily slips his body around to your back.

He exhales another gentle sigh, now a cool air hitting the side of your neck and making you shiver whilst his chest presses against your shoulder blades. Taking your hands within his once again, he now does something that makes you screw your eyes shut and completely mentally kick yourself because of how much you enjoy it.

Pressing his flat palms over the tops of your hands, he splays them onto the bottom of your thighs before sensually sliding his fingers into the slots between yours. Then, he starts dragging both of your hands up each of your thighs, making sure that you can feel as much as he can underneath the pads of your fingertips whilst he breathes into your ear and expands his chest along your back.

‘Hm… I also like a lot of touching…’ he whispers into your ear before nudging it with his nose.

The more you let him guide both of your hands, the closer they get to your now throbbing centre as they slip up your tender inner thighs. But before you two touch it, he expertly manoeuvres them back out to the sides.

Once again, the sensation of your boyfriend’s malicious best friend touching you without him knowing catches up to you and you accidentally freak out.

Jumping away slightly you shake your head and this time move further into the room rather than sprinting back out of the door again.

You begin to pace.

Matt looks at you as though he has the praying eyes of a panther, predatory instincts kicking in as soon as you move away from him.

Smacking his lips in annoyance he raises his eyebrows sassily at you, his earrings glinting in the small stream of light and glittering every time they wobble when he moves.

Making up your mind and making it up quickly, you throw your whole entire relationship built up on trust into the trash as you stutter out a pathetic, cheating question that you hope will answer the doubts running around in your head.

‘You won’t tell a fucking soul about this will you?’

Matt raises his eyebrows again to look at you in judgement before substituting his incredulity for a smirk instead. Placing one of his hands over his heart, his other one raises to his head whilst he pledges allegiance to you with a mocking nickname lilted onto the end of the quip for good measure.

‘Cross my heart and hope to die, sweetheart’

With this… somewhat reassurance, you genuinely believe that Matt won’t tell a soul. So, you decide to think like a man… with your clit instead of with your brain, just as they would with their dicks.

‘So… what else do you like?’ You curiously ask, your voice still laced with a huge amount of hesitance, because you know of Matt’s dating history… and based off of some of the horror stories you’ve heard, you’re sure he likes a lot of different things. He doesn’t seem to be the picky type.

But you let Matt answer for himself, and you also let him once again walk back up to you, this time allowing him into your personal space without any fight at all. In fact, you’re actually more responsive to his touch.

He trails his hands around the hem of your jeans, before fiddling with each side of your shirt whilst his seductive eyes mimic his raspy voice.

‘I like things sticky… wet and messy… if it’s not messy I don’t fucking want it’.

His voice is slow, like dripping hot honey coated in sugar. The overall sensual manner of it makes your panties pool and you can practically feel yourself sticking together down at your core. Matt plays on this a little bit more after he sees how much it affects you.

‘Can you do messy baby? With those gorgeous thighs of yours? You wanna be my good girl tonight?’

He pouts boyishly and then tilts his head just that little bit so that he can feather a teasing kiss onto your lips before pulling away.

By now he is standing in the gap between your legs, enough so that when he compliments your thighs he can reach down to them and cup the backs of them, giving them a testing little squeeze.

His nose runs down the arch of your neck to your shoulder as he does this and at the same time, you both test the waters by giving each other an inconspicuous grind. Matt moans slightly into your skin at the erotic motion whilst the scruffy hair by his ear rubs against your jawline.

Throughout all of this dry sex however, he still manages to keep cool and collected. Unlike you, who practically falls to a puddle at his feet. The only thing keeping you up is his big palms supporting your thighs whilst his lips pucker and pepper a sprinkling of small kisses all along your exposed shoulder.

‘You wanna know how I taste don’t you? How I feel’. His voice rasps cheekily whilst referring to his cock. Now it’s your turn to let something of a stuttered whimper out into the air that gets semi-trapped on the way up because of just how far back your neck tilts to let Matt in to your exposed skin. You notice that now, your back is also arched for him and his cock as well. God how needy could you be?

‘I bet you’re just aching to hear what I sound like when you pull my hair…’ he continues his tease, showing you no mercy as your own hands grip and tighten onto each of his shoulders. They tremor in apprehension.

And now, Matt decides, is the best possible time to give you another kiss. Only this time, it’s longer, heavier and thicker with the feelings of lust laced within the twists of his tongue. Matt also lets your thighs go just so that he can grab a hold of each side of your jawline to steady himself better into the kiss.

Just like he had said before, it’s messy, and it’s sloppy. You easily feel the slick consistency of your salivas layering over the fullness of your lips. He rubs his own pair against yours before trapping them and sucking them, his tongue licking slowly over the plump pink flesh.

‘Give me your tongue baby’

He speaks quietly into your lips, pinching your hip bones after he teases his hands underneath your shirt. Clearly wanting you to reciprocate his tongue motions, it doesn’t take you long to do so whilst he gently pushes his nose to nudge against yours. Sensually, he starts to walk backwards.

Bending his knees, he falls down onto the bed and it squeaks underneath his heavy weight before his thighs spread open and he hauls you to sit on top of one of them. You can feel your cheeks burning.

Your eyes are squeezed shut, just to gaslight yourself into believing that you’re not really doing what you’re actually doing.

If you can’t see Matt and see the way you’re perched on top of his thigh as he easily cradles your ass possessively within his hands, then it’s not happening.

After you start to use your tongue more, from Matt’s tilted neck, you hear a throaty hum of delight before he rasps a quick ‘that’s my girl’.

Only your stomach pools with regret. Because you’re actually not his girl. You’re supposed to be Ryan’s.

You try your best to push the thought to the back of your mind however, and instead focus on the way Matt gently starts to apply pressure to each of your ass cheeks, willing them to slide forward, before he moves his thumbs to the front of your hip bones so that he can dig them into your skin and push you back into a grinding motion.

Your breathing is heavy, as is his, but you still continue to kiss, the sounds of your lips erotically moving together being pretty much the only sound in the room until you decide to speak up in response to what he had said earlier.

‘Well it serves Ryan right for being so stupid and not dropping you when he should have…’

Matt sniggers meanly with a toothy smile through your kiss, almost triumphantly at the fact that he had managed to slip past Ryan’s eyes with ease and take you as if it were like taking candy from a baby.

‘Fuck… you’re just as bad as me baby, aren’t you?…’ he muses in surprise, raising his eyebrows teasingly whilst you break away from each other’s kisses just so that he can look into your eyes. His irises flick between the left side of your face to the right, his hands still working you into a soft grind above his thigh whilst he passes his reddened tongue over his moist lips, almost hungrily. You find it within yourself to weakly smirk at his statement.

‘I’ve been waiting to put my hands on you for so fucking long baby, you have no idea’ he mumbles, again with another low and conniving laugh, not even a single thought about how Ryan would feel about all of this travelling through his mind.

Nope. His only concern currently, is how he can’t wait to hear the way you breathe his name through sweat, tears and pleasure as he has you in any way he wants. He feels proud, as if he is finally claiming his prize for being the shittiest friend known to man. But Matt isn’t really a friendly type of guy anyway. So he doesn’t give a shit.

The only thing he had been interested in was you in the first place, all he had needed to do was find a way into your life without making it too obvious that he was trying to steal you right from underneath Ryan’s nose.

Slowly, he slips his hand down to the front of your jeans, swiftly and expertly manoeuvring his fingers to the button so that he can pop it open and yank down the zipper with a desperate speed about him.

‘Shut up Matt… I don’t want to hear you gloating about this’. You whine pathetically, shyly looking down at Matt’s spread legs and the bottom of his green hoodie that currently covers his black belt, just so that you don’t have to look into his eyes.

He scoffs, yourself still not safe from the sharp edge of his tongue. You yelp when he decides to flex his torso and flip you two around.

‘Oh so you’re gonna be a cheeky little bitch about this then hm? Well, maybe you don’t deserve to have my cock…’ the spit he comes out with is ugly and threatening.

You’ll admit… you’re not quite expecting the change in power dynamic, and just the very sight of seeing Matt crawling his body over yours and trapping you with an animalistic look in his eyes makes all of this seem very real. There’s no going back now…

You gulp and blink with doe-like shock whilst Matt hooks his thumbs into your jeans to pull them halfway down your legs.

He sighs. ‘What would you rather me talk about then?’

But you only pant in return, cautiously looking down towards your jeans that are slowly being peeled from your smooth thighs as Matt’s face finds itself extremely attracted to your open neck.

‘Ugh, I don’t know Matt? Just… anything other than Ryan’ you complain, mildly rolling your eyes. Before he can go in to kiss your flesh, Matt catches this and actually snorts a laugh in response, clearly finding your lack of care for your shitty boyfriend highly amusing.

‘Hey, don’t worry, as soon as I’m finished with you the only name you’ll be able to remember is mine…’. Your thighs subconsciously squeeze at this comment, but you can’t quite clamp them together fully because Matt’s hips are in the way. He notices the tension in both of your muscles and so decides to milk it further by leaning his face down closer to yours whilst whispering a gorgeous ‘yeah? You like that?’ that rolls from off of his tongue with ease.

‘Mhm hmm’ you hum in return, trying to keep your mouth closed so that you don’t whine into the air when responding. Matt is clearly happy at this, reaching down one of his hands to his own pants that are fitted nicely around his legs.

He then places his other hand flat on the bed right next to your hip before using it to hoist all of his body weight up so that the hand down by his pants could expertly undo his belt and slip it out from the belt loops.

It’s extremely attractive, to see him towering over you like this just to undo his belt, and you feel your clit throb behind your panties once again when he bites his lip in concentration to get the rest of his pants undone just by using a single hand.

‘I wanna taste you so bad, but we’re gonna have to be quick baby…’ he mumbles to you after both of your attentions are side tracked to the door, where loud voices can be heard as people walk down the corridor and bypass the room. Too many people know who both of you are at this party, so it is risky doing this in here anyway, considering the fact that there is absolutely no lock on the door.

Pushing down his pants, you nod once again to agree with him before gulping at the slivers of his tanned thighs that reveal themselves the further down his jeans drop.

‘How do you wanna have me?’ You speak up timidly, feeling an awful lot like a mouse in the presence of a lion, one wrong move from you and you’re toast. But you decide to play along with Matt, because he seems to like it when you play the clueless game with him.

‘Have you ever had someone’s thigh before princess?’

Matt seems to immediately know what he wants to do to you with how quickly he responds and seems even more delighted at your virginal response of ‘what the fuck does that mean?’.

‘Sweetheart… has Ryan taught you nothing?’ He coos softly, his patronising tone still there whilst he sneakily slips his hands into your panties to pull them down and have cool air hit your centre. He has to bite his lip at the sight of your gushing wetness.

‘Well not really… he’s always sort of wanted to be on top so I’ve just let him…’. At this response, Matt scoffs and shakes his head in disappointment.

‘God Ryan what the fuck are you doing man?’ He quickly mumbles under his breath as if Ryan is in the room with you two before he turns his attention back to your needy figure.

‘I want you to cum all over my thigh angel… think you can do that for me?’ He questions encouragingly, your panties now also half way down your legs and sitting just above your sagged jeans. Your heart flutters and your back arches up once again whilst you hesitate.

Now, the throbbing is turning into a stinging because you haven’t touched yourself at all since this whole encounter has started, so you decide to simply answer with a quick ‘yes Matt, I-I can do that’.

He praises you right after with a sultry ‘that’s my good girl’ before getting up from his position over you and instead sitting down on the edge of the bed beside you.

Sitting upwards a little, you help Matt grab onto you, and his hands practically swallow your sides whilst he stretches you out onto his lap. Moving a little further up onto the bed his cattish eyes gaze up into yours with his pupils dilated and his mouth a blushing red.

Getting you onto a singular thigh, your knees plant on either side of the mattress and sink down softly due to the weight of your upper body. Your sensitivity touches the lower part of his thigh when you press yourself onto him.

Hissing, you whimper slightly in open-mouthed pain whilst your hands claw onto the sleeves of his green-hoodied shoulders.

You look down at the dark haired skin of his powerful muscle, testing the waters of what he’s about to make you do before you hear a low and guttural ‘spit’ violently exhale from his mouth. Glancing back up at Matt you see that he has an expectant look laced within his eyes.

And it doesn’t matter how much your brain screams that this is all terribly wrong, because you still will you mouth to produce an acceptable amount of saliva before knocking your head downwards and letting it all slowly drip from your open mouth.

The thick globule splatters noisily against Matt’s thigh and now Matt finds himself continuously throbbing at the look you give him as the last remnants of your spit linger around your mouth in mid air like a small spider’s web tendril blowing in the wind.

At least, it’s like that until Matt reaches out one of his fingers to whip it away and lick it into his own mouth.

Your saliva glitters in the low lighting and is soon joined by Matt’s own spit after he gathers it into his mouth and also releases it onto his now already lubed up thigh.

‘Fuck angel you are going to love this…’ he muses cockily, grabbing both of your hips within his hands before groaning whilst he lifts you slightly to place your aching and bare centre onto the sticky consistency of your strings of saliva.

Gritting your teeth upon first impact, you have to close your eyes and try not to whimper at the strange sensation Matt’s thigh gifts to you whilst Matt himself looks up at you, proud of what he has made you feel thus far.

He knew you weren’t going to last long at all.

Your face gets very red and very flushed, very fast. As soon as Matt starts to use his hands in a similar way to how he had when you were both clothed, the pressure it brings to your core nearly makes you light headed. You feel so sensitive, and you can hear your spit being spread about his thigh as he tenses his muscle and then relaxes it to give you a perfect pleasure point when rubbing you over it.

You still have your eyes closed, but from the darkness of your vision, you can clearly hear Matt’s smooth voice cooing a gentle ‘open up those pretty little eyes for me…’.

You struggle to do this in between screwing up your face in pleasure, and knocking your head back automatically every time he decides to lift his thigh up a little into the grind so that you can feel it even harder when you ride him. But you slowly manage to peek both of your eyes open ever so slightly.

‘Fuck sake Matt what are you doing to me…’ you breathe out shakily down to him, both of your noses brushing from your position straight above him. After getting used to his motions, you also decide to help him out a little by engaging further and now using your own legs to hoist your harder and faster on his thigh.

‘I’m just doing what Ryan never could…’ he whispers back up to you in a snake-ish manner, knowing how good he’s fucking you and also knowing that it’ll never be the same with Ryan ever again after this. You’re just simply going to want more and more of Matt instead…

‘It would always make me so jealous whenever he put his hands all over you. I swear he did it on purpose just to tease me… and it killed me every time because I so desperately wanted to know what kind of face you’d make if it were my cock stretching you out…’

Whining to him in stimulation once again, your gut flutters and you have to bite your lip to suppress dizzy spells because of how perfectly he’s using his leg.

‘I love feeling you on me like this princess, you feel so fucking good…’ he breathes back up to you in response. ‘I won’t even have to jerk off later because you’re gonna make me cum in my pants’ he continues.

‘But… what about - fuck - giving you a taste?’ You moan into his lips after you start to messily make out with him once again, now both of your lower and upper body halves at work to help you reach your high.

Matt hums a groan in response to this, bucking his hips forward a little in excitement yet still keeping the quick rhythm of his thigh for you.

‘It’s okay, it’s okay, you can let my face have a turn next time’ he utters quickly and without worry, automatically assuming that there’s going to be a next time - which probably is accurate with the rate that this is going at. Yet, it’s still bold of him to assume.

However, most of your thinking is forgotten as you soon feel like you have bypassed a certain point within your build up stage that tells you that you are ready to cum, because it starts to burn in your gut and you feel like you seriously can’t keep quiet at all anymore with whimpers, whines and moans expelling from your mouth into Matt’s.

Uttering something completely inaudible to him, he seems to catch on that you’re close to finishing and so reaches one of his hands up the front of your top to play with one of your tits beneath your bra. This only enlarges the feeling whilst Matt praises you with showers of ‘you’re being such a good girl for me’ and ‘you’re doing so well angel… just a little more’.

The last remnants of his praise are eeked out of him before something within you snaps and a gushing waterfall of pleasure rolls all the way up your gut like some form of ricocheting explosion. You almost cry, and your eyes certainly dampen a little with tears as your mouth drops open.

From below you, Matt admires the sounds of ecstasy tumbling from your lips as you cum.

‘Shhh, shh- shhh, I know baby, I know…’

Whilst he helps you ride out your high, he hushes you gently like a baby, stroking your back and gazing up at you sympathetically, as if it wasn’t just him who had caused your body to react in this astronomically earth shattering way.

‘Jesus pretty, you’ve soaked my thigh…’ he remarks in absolute shock after you wobble your way off of your seat on his leg to crash tiredly next to him onto the bed. You smirk in exhaustion, before your squished lips mumble a ‘yeah well that’s all of what Ryan couldn’t give me, so savour it Matt…’ into the mattress. Matt also snorts, before cleaning up a little bit of your sticky cum and licking it from off of his finger right in front of you.

‘There… I did get to taste you in the end…’ he muses playfully, to which you hide your face into the blanket and groan at what you had just done.

The feeling of realisation after you’ve made a mistake is never a nice one, however, what is as equally concerning is the fact that you don’t seem to care as much as you thought you would have, which sends warning sirens off in your head once again.

You had just cheated on Ryan… but what’s even worse is that you had cheated on him with his so-called ‘best friend’, the same best friend who had coaxed you into cheating with him in the first place.

‘Ryan can’t know about this…’ you croak fearfully into the mattress whilst Matt stands up to put his pants back on properly again.

He spins around to you, his skinny, short figure accentuated in the light as he does his belt back up with a cheeky grin on his face. His hair is fluffy and tussled at the front from when you had carded your hands through it a couple of times whilst you had fucked.

His little chain with a small horse pendant on it also glitters with malice and cockiness at the state he had left you in, crumpled on top of the mattress. God, he’s going to love sneaking around behind Ryan’s back to fuck you, he always gets a free high from playing these kinds of games with people’s heartstrings.

‘Don’t worry… I don’t kiss and tell… plus, keeping it a secret is all part of the fun anyway…’

@gamermattsgf

@sturnobsessedwh0re

[jamil-s-wifey]

If you're taking any scenario request. Maybe could I request funny/silly one where Leona and his S/O are married and live in the Royal Palace. Leona's S/O has gotten lost somehow in their own home and when found their response is "This place is too damn big I'm sorry!"

You have NO idea how much I love these types of fics! Wholesome crackheadedness at its finest✨ We love a spouse with 0 orientation skills. (I'd know, I get lost in supermarkets) This was ONE OF THE FUNNIEST THINGS I've EVER written. I hope you enjoy!

"What the actual fuck."

A turn here. A turn there.

Oh, would you look at that - the exact same vase you passed 5 minutes ago. But was that really the same vase? Or was it its evil twin, trying to further confuse you, only for you to get lost even more and die of starvation, eventually BECOMING ONE WITH THE PALACE...

God, whoever built this palace should have their head on a stake. Haha, that sounded a lot like the Red Queen of Hearts. Perhaps Riddle was rubbing off on you. You two did text occasionally since graduating from NRC.

Speaking of graduation, you married Leona. (yay!) And it's not like you weren't happy. Life was relatively peaceful. You two moved back to the palace. Arrangements had begun for you two to take over a certain part of Sunset Savannah, as something akin to a *Peerage. (They had their own name for it, you are currently far too annoyed to remember.) A lot of (semi-forced) communication set the road to reconciliation between the two brothers. (Admittedly a very long road. A road that puts Gulliver's travels to shame.) The Royal Family™️ accepted you with open hearts. (albeit a tad wary at first)

Really there was only one major problem.

The ROYAL PALACE IS LIKE A GODDAMN LABYRINTH. And that's rich, given your history of painting the white roses with Ace and Deuce in Heartsabyul's maze. So here you are, lost.

Scratch that.

Lost: again.

And all you wanted to do was find Cheka's room. You had a gift for the little cub.

"An architectural masterpiece, my ass. This is an architectural disaster. A disaster with a capital D. D for Vitamin D - what I won't be getting, because I'm trapped within these walls, where the SUN CAN'T REACH ME-"

Okay. Calm down. It's not that bad, sure there isn't a soul in sight, but you're bound to stumble upon somebody at some point, right? There had to be servants, or guards, or somebody! UNLESS! This is all an elaborate plan to get rid of you.

Aha! That must be it. The Royal Family wants you dead and they intend to make it seem like an accident! But Leona wouldn't allow that, right? He loves you! Dearly! You're his spouse, his one and only! Ah, cruel fate.

Is it just you...or are these walls moving in on each other. So this IS an assassination attempt! And you presented yourself on a silver platter. Good job, s/o. Splendid work. A royal for a few months and you're already about to be assassinated. Your name shall remain the book of "Dumbest ways to die." Goodbye cruel world-

"S/o."

Leona's voice rang through the empty hallway, "What are you doing out here."

Ah! And so tragedy was avoided once more!

"Leona, my LOVE! Thank God."

"Did you just- get lost in the palace... again?", his eyes read annoyance but his tone was teasing.

"It's not MY fault this place is so damn big, what do you need all this space for anyways? Indoor badminton? Hide and Seek or Die?"

"Definitely that last one. That's how we get rid of our enemies."

"AHA! I knew it! So this IS an assassination attempt!"

He simply rolled his eyes, pulling you towards him to wrap an arm around your waist and kiss you on the forehead.

"This isn't an assassination attempt. You did this yourself. It's called idiocy."

"You should build a better palace."

"What I should do is put a collar on you. With a tracking device on it. Like a pet."

"Oh, Leona~ Who knew you were into that~"

"Next time I'm leaving you here to rot."

"Then I'll haunt you to Hell and back."

He smirked, pinching your cheek as you were both making your way far from the cursed looping corridor.

"At least you won't be able to get lost."

"I told you, it's not my fault."

"Nah, of course not. The Palace is just cursed."

"EVIDENTLY."

You both knew this isn't the last time you'll be getting lost. And Leona was seriously considering the tracking device.

Perhaps he'd already ordered it too.

You were about to find out.

*Peerage - collective noun for titles like Duke, Duchess, Count, Earl etc. Comes from "Peers of the Realm" where one could hold one or more of these titles. It differs from monarchy to monarchy. THAT'S YOUR WORD FOR THE DAY FOLKS!

[blarshwritezz]

Can I request a yandere mafia boss x fem reader Nsfw where reader just wants to finish her education and get her dream job when the mafia boss asks her out but when she declines so he just makes sure reader will never be accepted back into any universities anywhere or get any jobs ever as a way of showing how well he can "provide"

I'm finally back! probably

Yandere Mafia Boss x Careerwoman Reader

M yan x F reader

TW - manipulation, abuse of power, NSFW, kidnapping

"I'm sorry?" You raised an eyebrow and looked at your dean. "What do you mean?"

"Exactly what I said. You're expelled under the premise of violating this university's code of conduct."

You didn't understand. What did you do? Did you violate some obscure rule that you've never heard of? But that couldn't be! Sure you may have gone against a few small rules every once in a while, but everyone did! You've done nothing to warrant this, you were a model student!

But it looked like there was no hope. You left campus rejected, never to return.

This was truly awful. This was your walk of shame. Your apartment wasn't far, so usually you walked. It was always nice to get some fresh air.

And along your walk, of course you ran into him. You didn't know much about him but he just seemed dangerous. And he seemed to like you.

"Why the long face, darlin'?" He asked, walking alongside you.

You ignored him, hoping to get rid of him. But of course, that didn't work.

"You know, if you were my woman you'd never have bad days. I'd spoil you to no end." He wrapped an arm tightly around your waist, guiding you to walk another direction. You tried to resist, not wanting to deal with him today, but of course he dragged you along anyway.

You didn't have time for this. You had to figure out where to go in life from here. Maybe you could apply to another university? You wouldn't have good enough chances because of this new expulsion on your record. But surely somebody would still take you, right?

So you, of course, struggled and struggled to get out of his grasp, but to no avail. His grip was strong, and only tightened the more you tried to get away. He didn't let go of you for a second. When you got to his luxury car, he even sat you on his lap while he drove. You wanted to get away, but you didn't want to be in a car crash, so tried to stay out of the way.

"If you keep squirming around like that, I might have to pull over and teach you how to be still." His husky voice whispered in your ear. He pulled you tighter against him, something hard rubbing against your thigh. You hoped it was just his phone in his pocket.

As you pulled up to his mansion, your jaw dropped. You knew he was rich, but what was he, a billionaire?! You didn't even know what he did for a living!

While you were gaping at his little home, he took that as an opportunity to carry you inside. Somehow, the inside was even more impressive. You see at you even saw a few servants, but that only made sense for a home of this size.

"You see, this is the kind of life I can give you. All this and more, my darling." His hot breath brushed against your ear as he spoke.

His grip on you only tightened as he carried you up to your room. He's spent so long preparing it just for you. And him too, of course. His woman should have a suitable living space.

And it certainly did not disappoint. It was like your dream room to the max. You even spotted a few items you previously had in your apartment around the room. You were going to ask, but he tossed you on the bed and got on top of you before you had the chance.

You didn't need to know that he had his men break into your apartment and bring everything here while you were being expelled.

"And you know, it's not just luxury I can provide." He grinded against you slowly, his hand cupping your breast. "I can give you more pleasure than you can dream of, you know."

Again, he gave you no time to answer. His lips were immediately on your neck, gently sucking and biting, making you gasp. He was especially hard on your more sensitive areas, making sure to leave as many hickeys as he could.

He groaned as he went lower and your shirt got in the way, annoyed. Damn thing limiting his access to your gorgeous body. So naturally, he ripped it off of you, murmuring that he'd replace it between kisses and bites.

He did the same with your bra, pausing for a moment to stare. This close of a view was way better than spying on you with binoculars.

His mouth soon enveloped one of you sensitive nipples, his hand pinching and playing with the other. He swirled his tongue around then sensitive bud, only spurred on by your pretty whimpers.

He didn't want to leave your breasts, but he just had to. If he wanted to get to his ultimate goal, that is. So his kisses trailer down your stomach, and before he had the chance to be stopped your pants and underwear were already shredded and discarded like your other clothes.

He let put a soft moan when he finally reached your perfect pussy. Fuck, you just tasted to good! Oh and those sounds you made, it was like you wanted this more than he did. And you were already so wet too.

He attached himself to your cute little clit, gently sucking and flicking the bundle of nerves with his tongue as two of his fingers found their place inside your wet hole. He started gently, of course; he didn't want to give you too much at once. Not yet. But soon he couldn't help himself.

His mouth and fingers got rougher, his free hand holding your hip. He was only further encouraged when your thighs wrapped around his head, keeping him trapped against your pussy. He'd gladly eat you put until he suffocates or until you passed out. Whichever happened first.

And he couldn't help but grind into the bed as your fingers found their proper place in his hair. His moans as you made his head move however you wanted vibrated against your lower lips, driving you closer to the edge.

Eventually it was too much. You just had to cum. And he happily lapped up every last drop as you kept his head firmly pressed against you.

"Oh, Darlin'," He groaned, a perverse smile on his face as you finally looked up at him. "You really do make me crazy~"

This was the one that I apparently forgot to save so most of it got deleted a while back lol

[hedwig221b]

hiii i hope you're well ! can we please have a snippet ? 🥺

You're in luck cause I've been writing over the weekend so I actually do have something to share lol

.

“Are you familiar with this part of town?” Derek asked.

Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Stiles smile a little.

“No,” the omega answered with a tinge of nostalgia. “This is where the rich kids lived. You know, the assholes.”

“Are you saying I’m the asshole?” Derek arched his brow.

“No, you’re a rich kid.” They walked a bit in silence. Stiles sighed. “I guess, I should stop saying that.”

“Saying what?”

Stiles shrugged. “I mean, I should probably stop referring to myself as not rich. It’s not a good look if I want to attract someone with money.”

Derek tensed. He worked his jaw for a bit and glanced around, suddenly despising the humans living there.

Assholes, Stiles said they were. The same assholes that would probably sell the said houses to get the omega.

Derek felt Stiles’ careful gaze at the side of his face.

“What, no ‘just be yourself’ speech?” Stiles let out a dark laugh. “Harsh, dude…”

“I can be harsh if you want me to.”

Both of them stopped.

Stiles folded his arms and narrowed his eyes at him. “Shoot.”

Derek huffed and shook his head. “Listen, I don’t know what movies you watched—”

“Hey!”

“— or what bullshit they told you about marriage. But those people? The ones that requested a meeting with you? They offered to buy you.” Derek breathed out harshly. Stiles just stared at him with a mask on his face. “They came to my mother, they came to me. You don’t even understand what kind of money they have going around. And don’t think they didn’t make the same offer to the institute — they did. It was my mother who refused to let them accept.”

Derek bit down on his words and glanced around, instinctively seeking danger and finding nothing but bright orange light and high brick fences. When he turned back, Stiles was still staring at him from under his long fucking eyelashes.

“You are a status, Stiles,” Derek grunted, meeting his gaze. “A rarity only the ‘best’ of them can afford. I’m sorry but they don’t give a fuck about who you are.”

Stiles blinked, his jaw working.

“Sure, anyone can send a request for you. A hopeless romantic from those movies you watched, the one you would maybe fall for. But the minute they notice whom you favor… God help them if they don’t have the means to protect themselves.”

“So, what,” Stiles’ throat clicked, “you’re saying I should just lie down and spread my legs for anyone who’s rich enough?”

Damn, Derek hated the thought with vitriol. He jutted his chin out and flashed his eyes at the omega.

“No. I’m saying that I can’t lie to you. I doubt someone told you how it’s gonna be, and I don’t think anyone will bother in the future. Sorry to be the bearer of the truth. This is not a movie, or a fairytale. I cannot guarantee who is going to request you or what the poll is going to be like. But I swear to you that I’ll do anything to make sure that you will be the one making the choice in the end.”

Stiles’ eyes were unreadable.

Still, in this ugly light, with a frown on his face, and an angry tightness to his lips, he was the most beautiful creature Derek had ever seen.

Damn him. Damn whoever gets to have him.

[aquickstart]

ok sure i'll talk about farleigh start. i'll talk about his tragedy of never being enough as it were and then having to deal with fucking oliver. sure. disclaimer: it's about class (and race) and the horrible reality of the rich. the horrible reality of living as farleigh.

another disclaimer: i'm white! and poc definitely pick up on everything i'm talking about here as it is, and better. i was and am specifically interested in farleigh vs. oliver but it's impossible to examine without considering race. definitely let me know if anything abt this sucks!

farleigh and oliver are similar. it's annoying because every intruder that is not himself is annoying, partly because felix's attention swaying from farleigh is dangerous; there is always a threat of being discarded, even if no precedent existed. the potential is terrifying.

but you'd think he's seen this before, every summer (if venetia is telling the truth) or at least often enough to learn to recognize it fast, so he should know this will pass. part of it is i think still the deep anxiety, and i think he hated every boy that was there before, and it is sort of routine.

but definitely a huge factor in farleigh's annoyance is the fact that he's a biracial (black for cattons, that's all they see) man in a white rich household. he's alert and exhausted all the time. of course he's angry at oliver, regardless of whether he's the first to crash at saltburn for the summer or the fifty-first.

but the important thing is this.

farleigh is very jealous of and angry and pissed at oliver because farleigh sees all the similarities between them. outsider, in financial trouble, whatever it is, in need of cattons; and yet oliver is preferred. and farleigh seems to be the only one to really consider it. felix does not pick up on the hint when farleigh brings up the birthday party vs. his mother. felix's clumsy "different or... anything like that" is as much about race as it is about class, of course. the "we've done all that we can" bit is felix absolving himself of guilt because surely they had, surely the mysterious collective cattons that he's not really part of had tried all they could do. to him, farleigh is different from oliver, because farleigh has been helped. felix is rich and white and twofold uncomfortable with farleigh, even if he's nice about it, even if he genuinely enjoys his company; he doesn't look too close at farleigh because he feels too guilty to come too close. and farleigh can't do anything about it. he can't nice himself into it. the fucking tragedy of him is that he's never enough in the world of the ultra-rich white, even if (especially because!) he's born into it.

farleigh is very pissed at oliver because farleigh also sees all the differences between them. you know who can be nice poor white enough to fit in? fucking oliver. felix says "just be yourself, they'll love you" when oliver first moves in. farleigh was also probably told the same thing, and felix also probably believed that farleigh could just be himself, but even if the cattons were magically not racist at all (impossible), it wouldn't make a difference to farleigh. he would still self-censor, keep in check, be in dangerous waters (because racism is not just about the individual, but about the system). we see that he'd won himself leeway by years of trial and error by the way he speaks to the family, but it's still within the boundaries of acceptable, built by the cattons. he's part of them because they allow it, and farleigh is very, very aware.

the annoying thing is oliver can be himself. like, truly, genuinely, he can just be. and farleigh can't help but envy that.

as a side note, oliver is obviously jealous of farleigh in the beginning as well, because regardless of the reality of farleigh's situation, he was born into it, and hence, at least in oliver's mind, has his position solidified. oliver's whole thing is unquenchable thirst and hunger for whatever and everything the cattons have (including themselves!). he wishes to have been a catton from birth. to oliver, at first, there's nothing farleigh can really do to lose it. and until he figures out the cattons completely, he can't help but envy that.

but i think farleigh senses something different about oliver early on. at least on the level of the text, we have "you're almost passing [for] a real, human boy", which is so important because farleigh is the first to point out oliver's weirdness. the next to do so is venetia in the bath scene calling him a freak, but it's too late. farleigh is too early.

and i like to think he clocks oliver too early because he sees the jagged edges that he recognizes in himself. i think that one other thing that farleigh envies is oliver's freedom to let go. freedom to let go is very similar to freedom to be, but not quite the same.

to be is about perception: farleigh knows he cannot fall out of line, but would like to, and oliver does not have to worry about it at all (i mean, he does, because oliver also performs for felix, but farleigh doesn't know that).

to let go is about the self: farleigh is too scared to even want what oliver eventually does, to even consider the possibility. oliver can let himself want. oliver can let himself act. oliver just can do things and want things. i'm not sure farleigh can.

and so in this scene, when oliver's wants and actions have landed him nowhere with farleigh, felix, venetia, the cattons, of course farleigh gloats. he can let himself do that, because if the cattons are slowly discarding him, farleigh can allow himself this one small victory. he's relieved because despite the dangerous similarities, oliver is, thankfully, not really the same as farleigh, right?

but like. this movie is a love letter to all things gothic. oliver is a white man. he prevails. the brief performance that oliver put on did eventually end up more effective than farleigh's lifetime of constraint. my heart fucking breaks for him to be honest.

the issue that remains is the fact of farleigh's survival. i like to think that oliver came to respect him. oliver is smart, but farleigh is clever. he picks up on everything oliver does (to refer back to the karaoke scene, farleigh immediately retaliates in the cleverest way, in the moment), and he's the only one to do so consistently (venetia, again, for example, comes close, but too late; oliver doesn't like that, there's nothing to work with). hence, stay with me for a little longer, the paradox: farleigh survives because he was never enough for the cattons, but he is very worthy of oliver's attention. in his own freaky way, oliver wants him. look at that.

so. farleigh. farleigh might come back. he always comes back. and i think oliver wants to try harder next time.

[aspoonofsugar]

What do you think of Stolitz as a ship? What do they offer each other in the story in terms of growth, and what does their relationship contribute to Helluva's themes?

Hi,

I love Stolitz as a ship! I think their dynamic is very well written and original. Here come my thoughts on it.

THE CIRCUS

The episode The Circus clarifies what Stolas and Blitz's dynamic is and how it came to be.

Stolitz is a relationship where mutual attraction and care is poisoned by self-hate and classism. This is shown in Blitz and Stolas's first meeting, where:

Paimon buys Blitz as a playmate to Stolas, so that he does not have to deal with his child's emotional turmoil. He also tells Stolas not to bow to Blitz because his social standing is higher.

Cash sells Blitz out and guilt-trips him by using Blitz's mother as leverage. He also forces Blitz to steal from Stolas by insisting it is alright to do so because all Goetias are bad.

So, both Paimon and Cash enforce on their children two ideas:

Stolas and Blitz are worth something only if the family benefits from them. Stolas has value if he marries Stella and gives a heir. Blitz is good if he puts himself in danger and steals from the nobles.

Goetias and Imps should not mix and should not treat each other as equals. Goetias are rich fuckers and Imps are inferior masses.

In general, Stolas and Blitz internalize that relationships, especially inter-class ones are transactional. Stolas can't just go and befriend Blitz, but his father needs to buy him. Blitz can't just go and have fun with Stolas. He needs to steal from him.

Fast forward to when Stolas and Blitz meet again as grown-ups. They immediately rekindle their relationship, but they do so by imitating their respective parents:

Stolas buys Blitz's affection by using his status as a Goetia (his grimoire)

Blitz takes advantage of Stolas's attraction to him, so that he can manipulate Stolas and steal the book

In short, nothing has changed since they were kids. They are now free from their fathers, but they approach relationships the way they were taught. Deep down neither believes they have any value unless they make the relationship transactional. Hence the grimoire/book deal seems as the perfect solution for both. At the same time, both Stolas and Blitz have inter-class prejudices. These biases are challenged by a character that is a dark foil to both. Who is that?

He's galloping over the dusty planes Even the cacti know his name If you don't want to die don't cross his path The best assassin in the ring of Wrath He's Striker! He's Striker! Sure shootin', darn tootin', his name is Striker

STRIKER

Striker calls out both Blitz and Stolas on their inner classist biases, but he does so in different ways.

In the Harvest Moon Festival, he tempts Blitz to give in to his darkest side:

Striker: Blitzo, come on. You know, the two of us are superior than most of our kind. And you were so above suckin' on a disgusting, rich, pompous Goetia, only to sneak topside for scraps and work for bitter sinners, who could care less who you are, when you could be slaying Overlords.

In Western Energy he tells Stolas point blank how Goetias are hated because they steal from others:

Striker: Look. Not every ring is some fancy-ass city, with some fancy-ass mansion, that only fancy-ass royals get to live in. Some of us have hard lives to live. And some of us have everything we care about taken away by fuckers like you.

Blitz and Stolas have opposite reactions to Striker's challenge.

On the one hand Blitz is disturbed by Striker because he deep down sees how similar they are. After all, both are Imps who refuse to accept their place in the hierarchy. Blitz opens his own business, whereas Striker targets higher demons. Moreover, both are hitmen. It is just that Blitz operates on Earth, while Striker operates in Hell. So, Striker's anger towards Royals and society is something Blitz feels too. It is something that could get the best of him:

Stolas: You speak just like that vile Striker friend of yours.

On the other hand Stolas is disgusted by Striker because he forces him to face something Stolas himself does not aknowledge. Striker strips him of his powers and shows him how much the lower classes resent him and the other Royals. Striker tells Stolas directly that Goetias hurt him and stole everything he had. Despite this, Stolas fails not only to show any sympathy, but also to aknowledge his own biases:

Stolas: I don't look down on you! How many times do I ha- When have I ever?!

In other words, Blitz openly embraces classist ideologies and consciously projects them on Stolas. He uses them as an excuse to backpedal on their relationship:

Blitzo: Point is, royal demons don't give a shit about guys like us. They're all the fuckin' same.

Stolas instead does not realize his own classist bias and thinks that just because he cares for Blitz and admires him, his classism has no impact on their bond. Except it clearly has:

Stolas: As shocking as it may seem, Blitzy, my grimoiiiiiire is actually incredibly important. And it isn't supposed to be lent out to itty-bitty Imps like yourself.

This difference ties with Blitz and Stolas's ideas of each other and of relationships in general.

Blitz sees Stolas's flaws clearly and knows how complicated a relationship between a royal and an imp could be. However, he ignores Stolas's qualities and is overly cynical:

Blitzo: If by "crushes other's feelings" you mean- end shit before it gets serious, then bingo. I'm doing everyone a favor because relationships are boring.

Stolas sees Blitz's qualities and looks up to him. Still, he ignores Blitz's flaws and runs after an idealistic and irrealistic love. He is so romantic that he becomes delusional:

Stolas: You wanna know what I want? I want to know what it's like, to not be alone. I want to be someone's someone. I want to feel wanted. But like, in a romantic way, like I'm standing out in the rain at a train station and someone is shouting: “Harriet! Don’t get on that train, it’s going to London and I cannot be without you!”

So, Blitz only sees the worst in Stolas and forces negative classist stereotypes on him. Stolas instead only sees the best in Blitz and refuses to aknowledge his unconscious classism as an important factor on their bond. They need to grow in opposite ways, which is why they go through complementary arcs.

COMPLEMENTARY ARCS

Blitz and Stolas are respectively the protagonist and the deuteragonist of the series, as the first two episodes show:

Episode 1 showcases HB's dark comedy side and focuses on Blitz's family. As a matter of fact the whole episode comically juxtaposes the Demon Murder Family with the Human Murder Family. It also illustrates how Blitz's business works.

Episode 2 showcases HB's strong character and psychological focus and it explores Stolas's family. As a matter of fact the episode is dedicated to Stolas and Via's relationship, while introducing also Stella and the Goetia in general.

Blitz and Stolas are two sides of the same coin, both when it comes to their personal arcs and to their social roles.

Personal arcs

Blitz is full of relationships and of people who love him and that he pushes away. Stolas has instead very few relationships, that are mostly bad. However, he is scared to cut them because he fears loneliness more than anything. As a result:

Blitz's arc is about reconciling with all the people he hurt or lost (Fizzarolli, Verosika, probably Barbie Wire). All while trying to be a better friend and family member for those bonds he still has (Moxxie, Loona). He must build his own family (by repairing his broken one)

Stolas's arc is about claiming his freedom back, even if it means to go against social expectations, to lose his privilege or even to unwillingly hurt Via, his most precious bond. He must escape his own family (to build a new one)

Social roles

Blitz is an Imp, while Stolas is a Goetia. However, neither fits with what society expects from them. Blitz runs his own business and shows no respect for higher demons. Stolas is in love with an imp and asks for a divorce. Both are oddballs, who are disliked by their peers, but find company in each other. This is why throughout season 1, they end up saving each other:

Blitz saves Stolas from Striker in the Harvest Moon Festival

Stolas saves Blitz from the Dhorks in Truth Seekers

They do so cause deep down they care for each other. However, they still hide their feelings behind utilitarianism and classism:

Blitz insists he is only saving Stolas because he needs his book:

Blitzo: Yeaaaaah. Well, I'm not a fan of someone I offered a job to about to off my easiest lengthy ticket to Earth behind my back.

Moreover, he deep down sees Stolas as unkillable, so he does not warn him that a killer is after him.

Stolas starts a rant on how Blitz should be more careful with the book as to not cause problems for Stolas:

Stolas: How the FUCK... did you get caught by humans?! Are you little creatures not being careful up here?! You know, if you get in trouble, I get in trouble! WE... don't want that!

Moreover, his display of power impresses Blitz and strengthens his inferiority complex.

So, both Blitz and Stolas have the potential to care for each other and to help each ohter find the family they long for. However, they are still slaves to their flaws in season 1. That is why they receive two important call-outs.

OZZIE'S AND THE FULL MOON

Ozzie's and The Full Moon are where Blitz and Stolas are called out on their flaws. These episodes highlight both demons still have work to do on themselves and the way they approach relationships. However, the first episode's call out is mostly about Stolas. The second episode's call out is instead mostly about Blitz.

Ozzie's

Ozzie's highlights Stolitz's problems:

[Fizzarolli] Is that Blitzø? So you're showing your face? Hey everybody, this guy's a total disgrace! Some nerve you got to comment on a relationship Last I checked, your love life is a pile of shit! [Verosika & Crowd] Oh, Blitzø? I used to date him (date him, date him) [Blitzø] Oh Verosika, you are here [Verosika & Crowd] I'd stroke and I'd fellate him (fellate him, fellate him) Yeah, but when it was my turn (my turn, my turn) He did no reciprocatin' (what a dick-bag) A selfish imp in the sheets And just as bad in the streets A reckless, heartbreaking freak! [Asmodeus] Who's that at your table? Is your date a demon prince? Stolas, is that you? [Wally Wackford] Are you sleeping with an imp?! [Asmodeus] Wooo! My dark lord, how the mighty do fall You used to have a smoking wife, a kid, you had it all! I hope you didn't give it up so you and him could get it up You sold your life for a thrust Now, that's the spirit of lust

And makes clear what they want:

[Millie] I think you were trying to sing something for me, Mox [Moxxie] Yeah, I was I love us I love us just the way we are Don't have to pretend to like to do things we don't I've always got you around to laugh at my stupid jokes I'll never take you for granted I'll always give you my best And if you can offer the same thing Fate will handle the rest 'Cause I love you 'Cause I love you

They want a relationship like the one Millie and Moxxie have, but they can't because differently from the two Imps they aren't honest with themselves.

On the one hand Blitz keeps self-sabotaging his relationships. The moment they become serious he ghosts the other or hurts them, so that they fall out. His inability to honestly express his feelings is literally at the root of the most tragic event of his past:

Blitz's self-hate makes it impossible for him to confess to Fizz, which in turns causes the fire.

On the other hand Stolas is indecisive on what he wants. He wants to belong with someone and has feelings for Blitz. However, he does not act on them and uses the deal they stroke to save appearences with the Goetias. In fact, he is still very clearly concerned of what other people think. He is especially worried of destroying his family and hurting Octavia:

Both characters are flawed, but Stolas is the one who receives the biggest call out:

Blitzo: Stolas, don't act like what we have is anything but you wanting me to fuck you, okay? You make that really clear all the time. But, I just, I-I can't do it tonight, okay?

Blitz's speech opens Stolas's eyes to the point he starts to change. He finally asks Stella for a divorce, he gives Blitz more space and eventually decides to cancel their deal. All so that Blitz can choose freely if to stay with Stolas or not.

Blitz too grows, but his development is slower and more reactive. He mends things with Fizz, but he succeeds because the two find themselves in a dangerous situation outside of their control. Blitz still fails to connect with Barbie. Finally, he keeps being dismissive of Stolas, despite having clear feelings for him:

Blitzo: Stolas got what? How?... He can get hurt?

The Full Moon/Apology Tour

The Full Moon has the characters being on completely different pages:

Stolas: When I see him Blitzo: When I see him, I'm gonna do that thing he likes Stolas: I will change things Blitzo: No need to change things I'll just bring the rope and spikes Stolas: Oh God! Blitzo: We've got a nice arrangement and it's working out just fine We'll keep it light Stolas: I'll fucking die alone if this goes bad! Both: When I see him tonight

Stolas has developed to the point, where he wants the relationship with Blitz to either become a real one or to end. Blitz instead is fine to keep things as they are. In this way he gets to have a relationship, but doesn't really have to put in any effort.

This incompatibility explodes in their discussion, where:

Stolas conveys his feelings clearly enough, but is too self-focused on his own hurt to give Blitz any time to properly express his. Blitz's first and bad reaction is all Stolas decides to listen to. The moment Blitz confusely tries to reach to him, he dismisses him and only pays attention to Blitz's angry rant. If he were not too focused on imagining Blitz as this perfect knight in shining armor, he could have noticed the imp's confusion, vulnerability and desperation to keep the relationship going.

Blitz fails to understand both Stolas's genuine emotions and his own. That is why he is unable to give Stolas a proper answer. He himself is not sure, but instead of admitting it he makes sex jokes and tries to make their bond all about physical intercourse. He can neither understand feelings, nor communicate them. Moreover, the moment he is misunderstood he lashes out instead of trying to explain himself better.

As Blitz is the one who grew up the least, he is given the biggest call-out between the two. He is invited to a very special Anti-Blitzo Party, where he is forced to see first-hand how many people he hurt. There he is forced to face not only Stolas, but all his exes, Verosika and most importantly himself:

Blitzo: No. You're right. I actually am, ya' know... sorry. I-I don't want to be this way. Not forever.

Blitz reconciles with Verosika and will probably start to fix his flaws in the upcoming episodes. Like Stolas did after Ozzie's.

There is another interesting difference between Ozzie's and The Full Moon, though. Ozzie's outcome is explored in two different episodes, one dedicated to Blitz (Queen Bee) and the other to Stolas (The Circus). The two characters are both messed up after their first real date, but they go through their pain alone. The Full Moon's outcome is instead explored in Apology Tour, where the two characters face the pain of their break-up together. In a sense, it is only after their first fight they can really look at each other as two real people, instead than ideals.

BREAK UP THE (I)DEAL

Blitz sees Stolas as a powerful, cold and selfish Goetian Prince. Stolas instead sees Blitz as a wonderful Knight in Shining Armor. Both see the other as some kind of idealistic version of themselves. Either 100% negative or 100% positive. They ignore each other's feelings and struggles. That is why their first honest confrontation degenerates into a fight. If they knew each other better, they could have understood each other.

That is why it is only after they break up, that ironically they can treat each other as real people, as it happens in Apology Tour.

Both are able to properly express themselves freely. Stolas breaks his thirsy bird mask and shows how lonely and sad he is. Blitz breaks his self-assured asshole persona and says how vulnerable a real relationship with another makes him feel. Both are finally able to be themselves and to show themselves to the other.

However, they still have a long way to go before they can rekindle their relationship:

-Blitz is imo the one bound to grow the most from this altercation. He was called out directly on the things he did wrong and has finally to try and fix his attitude towards others. Something the narrative has made very clear he must do, not only when it comes to his romantic bonds, but to his platonic ones, as well.

-Stolas knows he messed up, but he is probably still struggling to see what exactly he did wrong:

Stolas: But maybe it's all on me For missing every sign and every glance and every turn Maybe there's something here for us to glean For you to teach and me to try and learn

Still, he is bound to soon receive some consequences. After all, he risked it all on his relationship with Blitz, only to find himself as lonely as ever. He is in the middle of a divorce, which will probably end badly for him. His relationship with his daughter is in danger and I would not be surprised if he were to lose his status as a Goetia soon.

In general, I am expecting the climax of the season being Blitz and Stolas risking to lose everything (their businesses, their families), but finding an ally in each other. Once again.

[lieutenant-teach]

Meeting Cyare’s father (or Anakin Skywalker doesn’t like his new son-in-law very much)

(Anakin doesn’t go Dark, everyone lives, everyone’s happy. No Sequels, rehashed Heir to the Empire instead of the OT. DinLuke, minor Anidala, CodyWan, HanLeia)

Din was really relieved about his helmet on, but then he remembered that the Jedi can feel other people’s emotions. No luck, then.

His cyare’s father’s eyes were trying to burn a hole in his head.

– Let me get it straight, Luke. A Mandalorian bounty hunter. – The voice could cut the stone better than a lightsaber.

– Mum likes him, – Luke was smiling, but Din saw him tensing for a fight. A cybernetic hand squeezed his.

– I didn’t raise my only children to give them away to some criminals, - Skywalker-senior stood up from the couch and started walking back and forth. – First I have to agree to allow my princess marry some smuggler…

– Han did help us to stop Thrawn.

– … and then my son wants to partner a bounty hunter, - Luke’s father wasn’t listening to him, anger coming off him like waves – Din was certain he wasn’t Force-sensitive, but one may not be to feel the Dark Side emanating from Anakin Skywalker at that moment.

Din remembered Luke’s words before ‘meeting with father’s half of the family’: ‘My Dad will become angry, I’m sure – he didn’t react to Han well, too – but don’t worry, he’ll cool down’. The warning rang in his ears when he saw Skywalker-senior for the first time: tall, with a rich mane of greying curls, but still very handsome former Jedi assessed him and made up him mind immediately. ‘Not worthy’. Now they were sitting on the softest couch Din’s ass had ever been on, in the richest living room Din’s eyes ever seen, and ‘officially’ letting Din into a very branchy Skywalker family tree. Or, trying.

– Dad, I’m almost thirty, I can decide for myself. And Din’s a hero of his own – he kept Grogu save and sound, stopped Moff Gideon, and also saved the town of Mos Pelgo from the krayt dragon…

– But a bounty hunter! – Skywalker-senior cried exasperatedly. – And, to add to it, a Mandalorian! It is all your fault, Obi-Wan! – he suddenly turned to Luke’s uncle, quietly watching all this until this moment.

– Wait, why? – the man was older than Luke’s father, gray hair and beard and mischievous twinkle in the eyes. So far he hadn’t said anything, but Luke had said his uncle would be supportive. Now it was time to find out. – My fault Luke fell in love?

– With a Mando! – Skywalker raised his voice. – Who in this family has a thing for Mandos?

– Do not speak about Satine like this, – Obi-Wan’s voice became steely, – and anyway, Cody is not a Mandalorian.

– He is a clone of a Mandalorian!

Din started to lose the thread of the conversation. He even wished he had a Jedi ability to speak telepathically and could ask Luke what the kark was going on. He shifted his head, trying not to be very obvious in his confusion, Luke caught his gaze and shrugged.

– Do you really think I taught Luke… - Luke’s uncle sighed. – We have been here before, Anakin. Luke is an adult, he can think for himself. If he brought young Din Djarin here, then he is certain in him and his own feelings. Did your fits of reality rejection change Leia’s mind?

Luke’s father breathed in and out heavily, clearly holding himself from harsher words, but reluctantly accepting the truth.

– Maybe, you should just talk to Din? – Luke’s uncle didn’t look happy, but so wasn’t Din hearing this suggestion.

‘Let me talk, – Din remembered Luke’s words. – When Dad started being… um… not very nice to Han – critical of sorts – Han started talking back. It escalated, some chairs were flying around, Dad and Leia exchanging angry remarks – Dad said she deserved better, Leia insisted she loved Han – and Han himself wasn’t making everything easier. It took two professional negotiators – Mum and Uncle Obi-Wan – to calm them down. Still, Leia and Han are happily married and have a son. So it’s just an unpleasant procedure you have to endure’.

– Maybe, he would take the helmet off for starters? – Poison in Skywalker’s voice could kill a bantha. No, a herd of banthas.

– I cannot, - Din was glad his voice didn’t tremble. He wasn’t afraid of the man, but watching a family drama, and, worse, being the reason of it didn’t feel well. He didn’t want to cause a rift in Luke’s relationship with his father. – My Creed prohibits me to.

– Veery convenient, - Skywalker smiled a tight and unpleasant smile, ignoring pleading and exasperated eyes of his son. – We’re a family now, you don’t show your face even to your family? Luke, have you seen his face?

– Dad, now it’s rude. Of course, I did. – It was obvious Luke was holding well, but his patience wasn’t infinite, too. – It’s only for immediate members.

Technically, after realizing the existence of different Mandalorian Ways, Din wasn’t sure he couldn’t do that. After all, taking off helmets didn’t make Bo-Katan Kryze or Sabine Wren less Mandalorians. But even if he would – not for this man.

The door slid open, a man quietly entered the room and stood behind Luke’s uncle’s armchair, resting his elbows on the chair back. Could he be Boba Fett’s relative? Because he was a carbon copy of Din’s friend, albeit much older. An intricate scar was winding its way from his temple down around his left eye.

– I am being quite nice! – Skywalker protested, dragging all attention to himself. – I can’t believe Padmé actually said ‘I like this guy, let’s take him in’.

– You know, I agree with you, - the probably-Boba’s-relative suddenly said. Luke’s uncle turned to him with puzzled expression. Luke looked disappointed. – The kids take after their mother in their bad choice of life partners.

Skywalker seemed about to blow up. He grabbed something from his belt that appeared to be a black respiratory mask and pressed it to his nose and mouth. The mechanical labored breathing sounds filled the room, Skywalker was drilling the man with burning eyes.

– Now, Cody, that was harsh, - frankly, to Din’s mind, Luke’s uncle didn’t look apologetic a lot. Luke sighed, his shoulders relaxed.

– I thought you were serious! – he even laughed a little, then gather himself again. – Dad, you do realize your approval or disapproval won’t change anything?

– Unfortunately, - Skywalker’s voice also sounded mechanical. – I believe no one in the galaxy or farther is worthy of my children. – He signed. – I guess I have to work with what we have here. – He shot a look at Cody, who smiled in return, and this smile was ‘I know you know I’m right, and I unashamedly love it’.

– Very well, - Obi-Wan clapped his hands. – Now as everything is settled, - Din clearly heard ‘Anakin is settled’, - we can share some stories and know each other better, right, Din?

Luke looked at Din with shining eyes. Din signed quietly. This look was worth all these awkward minutes.

[mikeysbride]

We Are Not Going Back

The 2024 U.S. presidential election has been anything but typical or boring, especially in the last month. Once President Joe Biden made the decision to remove himself from the race against Donald Trump in favor of endorsing VP Kamala Harris, everything changed. And it changed for the better if you're a Democrat. I was upset when he first withdrew, feeling that he was basically pushed into it by the media's insistence he is too old to run despite the record he's had as President the last 4 years. But then, within minutes, it seemed, my attitude changed to one of a sense of hope I hadn't felt in a while where the election is concerned. In reality, he made the ultimate selfless decision to put the country's interests above his own, and that is a remarkable quality, especially in a politician. It shows he's the real deal.

It appears I am not alone. The surge of excitement in the Democratic Party surrounding Kamala's nomination, which she'll officially accept this week, has been nothing short of amazing to watch. I have not seen anything like this since President Obama, and that says a lot. Her rallies are breaking attendance records, and even longtime Republicans are pledging to vote for her.

Of course, Kamala has already received the predictable criticism from the Trump cult about everything from her heritage to her laugh. Trump also still refuses to pronounce her name correctly, which is blatantly disrespectful but also typical behavior for him. If Kamala ("comma-la") is too hard for him to pronounce, Madame President will do just fine, I'm sure. But none if this should come as news to anyone. They have nothing else to go on, so of course they resort to the lowest rungs on the ladder when in reality, she has a stellar resume and record having served as a prosecuting attorney, District Attorney, Attorney General, Senator, and now Vice President of the United States. She is an actual prosecutor going up against Trump and his 34 felony convictions, and he's allowed to do that for the highest job in the country even though many jobs won't consider you if you have even 1 felony conviction. It's laughable really; it would be hilarious if it weren't also so sad and ridiculous. You can bet anyone of color would not be allowed the same leniency.

A few days before Kamala became the presumptive nominee, my 16-year-old daughter told me she felt apprehensive about her future if there were to be another Trump presidency. I told her that I feel the same way for myself. I actually feel that way about anyone who isn't a rich, straight white male because those are the only people Donald Trump cares about - those who look and think exactly like he does. But then, Joe passed the torch to Kamala, and it seemed the country awakened to a clearly better alternative and someone even the independents could get behind. Suddenly, there was hope that maybe, just maybe, things would be OK after all. That same daughter then came to me, just a few days after our previous conversation, and told me she is no longer fearful the way she was before. My 14-year-old daughter echoes her feelings, and the both of them have taken a greater interest in the election as a result. My teenage daughters are inspired and can see themselves in Kamala, and that is huge for them and for me.

I don't care who you are; this is historic and a big deal. It takes an incredible amount of privilege to see all this unfolding and not appreciate how significant this is in our history. Not only are we on the verge of having our first female U.S. President, but she's also Black. Not only that, but she's smart, successful, personable, and damn qualified. I can't help but think of my grandparents and how thrilled they would have been to live to see Barack Obama become President and now Kamala Harris. We came so close to a female President with Hillary Clinton in 2016, and I pray the election deniers and complacent people don't mess it up for us this time. I honestly don't think we can survive another Trump presidency and come out the same way ever again. He's already promised to be a dictator on his first day back in office and has alluded to doing away with elections...neither of which we need. And we certainly don't need him. He only wants to be President to avoid jail time, point blank. We can't let that happen.

We have a chance this November to save our democracy and keep moving forward - to make a hopeful future available to everyone and not just the rich, straight white males of the country. We can do this, and I have to believe we will. This is a test we absolutely cannot stand to fail. I understand the assignment. Do you?

[mapileonxputellas]

Only you (Alexia Putellas x Reader Part 2)

Ok so I originally wasn't going to do a part 2 but you persuaded me. Part one can be found here 2.2k words x

Thank you mi hermosa, I don’t know if you’ve read my other messages but I love you. I’ll fix this x

Of course you’d read the continuous messages she’d sent you over the week. You don’t know how she finally realised the issue, whether she was told or worked it our herself but it was clear she knew. Every morning you would wake up to a little message from her and every night she wished you goodnight. The days were varied, some had frequent messages others had only a few but there were always some.

You never replied. That single message after the match the only one you sent that week. You couldn’t talk to her and pretend like the only thing you were thinking about wasn’t Sofia. How much better suited they were. How you would never be enough for Alexia.

You were trying to go to sleep the night of the final, but just like always you hated sleeping alone. Alexia’s presence in your bed had almost been a constant at one point and now you struggled to fall asleep in the cold bed, her arm not strung across your waist and her light breathing not drowning out the silence around you. You tried to occupy your mind but it always went back to her. She’d probably be partying with her team, you knew they were scheduled to fly back immediately after the final and any trophy always called for a celebration.

A bang at the door startled you, thinking it was some kind of prankster you hoped they would knock once and then leave but when it happened again, and again, and again you realised they weren’t about to go away.

You didn’t live in a rough area but it also wasn’t filled with the rich and famous. This wasn’t the first time you would have dealt with young groups trying to prank you, knowing that the only way to get rid of them was to answer the door. Your stern face didn’t exactly match the fluffy pink pyjamas you had worn to bed but that didn’t even enter your mind.

Top actors could only dream of replicating the surprise yet horror on your face as you opened the door ready to scream at whoever was there but instead you were met by the one woman who had been on your mind all night. Stood there alone, tear marks evident down her face as she almost started crying again at the mere sight of you.

“What are you doing here Ale?” You couldn’t help but sigh, no matter how much her actions had inadvertently hurt you in the past you still hated seeing her upset.

“I couldn’t wait any longer to see you.”

“It’s almost 1 Ale, I’m not doing this right now.”

“I’m sorry I completely forgot that you could have been asleep, did I wake you?” You could see the panic in her eyes that she might have caused further trouble.

“You didn’t, I’m finding it hard to get to sleep right now.” It was like your brain and your mouth weren’t connected. Your brain was telling you to shut the door right now but your mouth suddenly blurted out your problems. “You should probably go get some sleep too.”

“Not without knowing what’s going to happen to us. I’m so scared that I’ve already lost you.”

“Ale….”

“Please Y/N, I know I don’t deserve it and I know you probably hate me already but…”

“I don’t hate you.” Even with all the hurt you felt you couldn’t stand seeing her crying and upset like this. “I’m not doing this tonight but maybe you can stay. Just to sleep.”

She accepted that offer, quickly making her way up to your bedroom and to her side of the bed, letting you curl up in her arms with your head resting on her chest. “I won’t give up without a fight Y/N. I love you.”

“I love you too.”

…..

You hated admitting it but that’s the best night sleep you’d had in a long time. For a moment you almost forgot all the issues, falling asleep in her arms and then waking up like you usually would on a Sunday, the smell of bacon wafting through your house.

Quickly freshening yourself up, you made sure you put on your stern face before you made your way downstairs. It would take a lot more than this to fix what had happened and you couldn’t let her get away with it that easily.

It was hard to keep that up though as you walked into the kitchen, finding her at the stove with just your shirt on and quietly humming along to the radio.

“Hola.” You were knocked out of your trance with her greeting and small smile. “Please sit down, it’s almost done.”

Never in your life have you ever had this much awkwardness tension between you both. You busied yourself pouring you both a cup of coffee from the pot and an orange juice as she plated up the food. You ate in silence, each of you occasionally looking up willing yourself to start the conversation and then cowardly putting your head back down.

You almost couldn’t write it, just as you finished with your food, The both of you awkwardly drinking your coffee when your song came on the radio. The very song that merely two weeks ago would have put a smile on your face but now just gave you memories of that night. The very reason you were now in this situation.

“I guess we should talk about it then rather than just sit here all morning.” You started. “Is Sofia about to turn up because she’s about as much a part of this relationship as I am?”

“You know that’s not true.”

“Do I because every time we go out it’s like she turns up? I’m constantly having to fight just to even have an ounce of your attention.”

“Except from that first time I’ve never once invited her out with us. I don’t know how she’s even finding out where we are.”

“That doesn’t excuse the fact that when she is there you act like she’s the only person you want to be with. It’s like you’re still in love with her.”

“I’m not.” The speed of her response at any other time would have indicated the truth in her words but right now it meant very little. “I love you Y/N.”

“That’s so hard to believe when last week you didn’t even want to dance with me, every invitation I gave you was just thrown back in my face. You spent more time talking about Sofia’s promotion than you did celebrating my birthday.”

“I can’t explain to you how sorry I am. Like I literally feel terrible. Sofia and I we didn’t work for a reason, she’s in my past now. I only see her as my friend, then Keira mentioned about it being weird and Lucy said something as well. I didn’t realise how it could seem to them but most importantly to you.”

“It’s like I’ll never be enough Ale, I’ll never be her.” Realising just how upset you were by this and the root cause of the troubles you’d been having, Ale knelt down in front of you, taking your hands in her own.

“You’ll never be Sofia, Y/N. But I don’t want you to be her, I want you to be you because that’s the person I’m in love with.”

“I’ll never be a football geek Ale, I’ll never have this high powered job. I’ll never match what you deserve.”

“I couldn’t care less about your job, I couldn’t care less about how much you love football. I love who you are as a person. I love how passionate you are about what you do. I love how you support me and care for me. I love how you take Nala on a walk when I’m having a bad day. I love how much my family adores you.”

“You family adores Sofia too.” You argued, sometimes them bringing her up hurt more than her showing up.

“You have no idea how much they adore you, whenever I go round they always ask about you, only you. Alba mentioned you coming on our family holiday before I could even suggest it. They like Sofia as my friend but they pushed me to ask you out.”

“Really?”

“Really, I know this isn’t a short fix. I know I’ll have to work my way back into your good books but I’m ready to put in that work.”

“What about Sofia?”

“She’s pushed the line with this and I can see that now. I’ll message her, set some boundaries. You can see the messages if you want.”

“I trust you Ale.” This whole thing was never about trust and you wanted to assure her of that. “But this needs some sort of change.”

“I know and I’ll do that.”

You couldn’t help but smile at the realisation that not only was this going to change but this was going to change because of Ale stepping up for your feelings. “Thank you.” You whispered, reaching for her hand to pull her onto your lap. “I love you Ale.”

“I love you too.”

….

The next Barcelona team night out was for Jana’s 21st birthday. Thankfully for you the international girls had returned from their break, so Keira and Ingrid were there to catch up with.

The major difference though from the last night out was the reassurance Ale gave you through the night. When you were sat down there was constant contact between you both, you danced together and laughed at each other as we danced with our friends and the birthday girl.

You were expecting Sofia to be there and your suspicions were deemed correct when she walked into the club with Patri’s girlfriend.

It didn’t take her long to come over to your table, yourself and Ale joined by Ingrid, Mapi, Rolfo, Keira and Lucy.

“Hey guys.” She said, conveniently standing at the head of the table next to Ale. Resting a hand on her shoulder you could see Ale tense as she squeezed your thigh and shuffled closer to you so the hand dropped. “Hi Ale.”

“Hi Sofia.” You could see Sofia’s face drop as Ale immediately stood up, taking your hand in her own. “Come on let’s dance.”

“Oh I was just about to suggest a dance.” The girl didn’t give up.

“Sorry this is just for Y/N and I. We love this song.” You’d never even heard of this song but you weren’t about to go against her point, letting her drag you into the middle of the dancefloor. “Do you want a dance then?”

“Always with you.”

You managed to avoid her for the rest of the night, thinking you’d got away with just one interaction with her when you spotted a figure coming out to you as you both waited for your taxi.

“Ale wait.” You had to hold in your groan as Sofia shouted over to you. Your pleas for the taxi to come quicker were left unanswered as she reached you, instantly reaching out to touch Ale again. “I haven’t had the chance to speak to you alone tonight. I thought we could catch up.”

“Sofia, you read my message right?”

“But that didn’t say anything about not being friends.” You’d read the message Ale had sent the afternoon after your talk. She made it clear that it wasn’t ok for her to be at your dates or to corner her at events. She couldn’t call Ale late at night to pick her up from the club. Lastly making it clear that she loved you and Ale wouldn’t put up with her disrespecting you in any way.

“I can’t be friends with someone who’s been almost stalking me for the past six months. How have you even been able to do that?”

“I thought you would want to spend time with me after the theatre trip, I ask around for you. I just wanted to spend time with you,”

“Well don’t, I thought I loved you in the past but that’s over now. I’m with Y/N, I love her. You can’t do this anymore Sofia, you’re clinging to a rope which isn’t even there anymore.”

If she hadn’t been manipulating this whole situation up to now you would have felt sorry for her. You could see in her eyes she still loved Ale and maybe now was the first time she’s truly recognised that this love has gone from Ale. “I’ll leave you both alone.”

“Thank you.” This is the first time you’d contributed to the conversation but you had to do this. “I hope you find happiness Sofia.”

“Thank you.”

The taxi arriving gave you the perfect opportunity to slip away from the conversation, leaving her stood on the side of the road as you cuddled together in the back of the vehicle. “I love you.”

“I love you more.”

[miss0atae]

The figure of the Fool from Meet You At the Blossom (Ep 1 & 2):

It’s no secret but I really fell in love with Xiao Bao from Meet You At the Blossom. At first, I wanted to write my random thoughts about the two first episodes of the series, but nothing I wrote really inspired me. I felt like I was just reciting what happened and I didn’t have fun doing it. I believe I should only write about things that inspire me or interested me. I really appreciate the plot of the series and we have promising and compelling characters, but none of them inspires me more than Xiao Bao. That’s why I’m writing this post specifically on him. I also have to say that I haven’t read that much Danmei, so I don’t know how it can affect all I’m going to write about Xiao Bao. Sorry in advance for any person keen on the genre.

I believe Xiao Bao is the archetype of the Idiot Hero or the Fool. The Fool in a story, is usually a character who has no real idea about what they are doing, doesn’t really know his enemies and who is protected by cheerful disposition. The Fool is freer and happier than those who have the wisdom of what is going in the world. They speak the truth because they don’t craft lies or seek to manipulate others. It works well with Xiao Bao because he is a cheerful person who is only trying to find the person who could be his wife. He is rich so he doesn’t have to worry about anything else than his goal. Even if he faced challenges, his determination remains solid because he stays very optimistic and he knows he will find it. When he met Huai En and mistook him for a woman, he gave his all to seduce him. He never stopped even when he was rejected several times. Xiao Bao is true to himself. He doesn’t need to hide behind a mask. He is not the most clever (doesn’t seem to be able to read properly) and he has never learned how to fight (why would he?! He is blessed with incredible chance so far). His lack of duplicity means that he does not let himself be dictated by fear (he goes after Huai En to save him or he stepped in when the prince was questioning his “future wife”).

The Fool is sometimes considered as a the representation of a new beginning or transformation. Without him, there is no story. It's the quest for finding a wife that leads Xiao Bao to Huai En and their meeting will change both of their life. If Xiao Bao had stayed at home and did nothing, Huai En could go more easily after his goals, but it may not work the way he wanted. He would be stuck on the same loop. Xiao Bao is going to disrupt it and thus will bring changes in his life. It has already started. Huai En would have not experienced the first signs of love and jealousy without Xiao Bao. He would just be hyper focus on his journey. As the Fool, Xaio Bao makes Huai En deviates from the linear path he was supposed to take. Huai En wants to be careful and wants to avoid failures to be sure to accomplish his goals. It can be a trial for him to always be on the lookout . Xiao Bao is not burden by these because of the fact he is the embodiment of the Fool. He lives in the moment and see realities as it fits his view of the world. He doesn't stubble even when he encounters obstacles: Huai En isn't a woman… that's not a problem. He doesn't discriminate. After all he was just trying to be a husband and it doesn't mean his significant other has to be a woman for him to do it. The societal convention doesn't accept it? It doesn't matter to Xiao Bao, there is a solution to any problems.

Poeple may considered Xiao Bao as an airhead but what he lacks in, he makes it up with his good nature and affability. Xiao Bao may be considered a fool by others but he isn’t really one. He is merely perceived this way. That’s why he is my favorite character.

[phantom-dc]

Dad Hood - part 15

‘So you need a spell? What kind, mate? I’m in a rush, so let’s get this over with.’

Constantine was annoyed. He hated dealing with Batman. The guy was a control freak, and magic doesn’t work by his rules. Constantine always felt like he had to over-explain everything just to keep the man from messing with things he really shouldn’t. Not only that, Zatanna had put a spell on him, either as a prank or as a way to help him quit. All his cigarette’s kept turning into lollipops. God, he needed a smoke.

‘We need a spell to find out where a child came from. So far we have found nothing, which is why we called you.’

Batman was annoyed. He hated dealing with Constantine. The wizard always acted like he was a toddler with a fork and an outlet. B was certain if he studied magic like Constantine he would figure it out, but he was too busy keeping Gotham safe for that.

‘Alright, let’s get this over with. At least we’ll be square afterwards. Where’s the little bugger?’

Constantine looked around. He saw Red Hood sitting at a table next to a little boy. Cute little kid, black hair and blue eyes. No wonder Batsy was so keen to help. But there was a strange energy around them…

‘The child is Red Hood’s son. We need to find out where he lived before he came to Gotham.’

Ah, so that’s why the kid felt like Death. Red Hood reeked of it and being his kid it’s no wonder the kid also felt like that. Sitting next to the kid, Constantine took out a cigarette out of habit, but it morphed into a lollipop in his hands. Cursing a bit, Constantine started setting up a simple spell. That should narrow down where the kid lived down to the city. Batsy can figure out the rest.

‘Mr. Con-man? Can I trade for your lollipop?’

Constantine blinked. Did the kid really called him Con-man? Seeing Red Hood smirk, John decided that the kid probably just couldn’t pronounce Constantine yet. Seeing the kid hold a juice-box, and not liking lollipops either way, John accepted.

‘Sure kid, deal. Now, this sigil should go here, and then this one-’

Suddenly John felt a warmth in his chest. He knew that warmth, but why now? Looking around, he saw the kid, enjoying the pop and still keeping his juice. Batman asked him what’s wrong.

‘…Nothing mate. I’m almost done. Just need to put this last sigil here and… done. Hey kid, could you put your hand right here for a moment?’

When Danny put his hand on the spell, the light formed into an Earth. A bright spot appeared in Illinois. Searching that spot on the Bat-computer, Tim found a place called Amity Park.

‘Ah, bollocks.’

‘Something wrong, Constantine?’

‘Ah, no. Nothing wrong, Batsy. I just need to go. I’ve got a… previous arrangement. I’ll see myself out!’

Constantine magicked himself back to his House of Mystery. He got a bottle of scotch and collapsed on the couch. Of course the kid was form Amity Park. Where else had Batsy gotten a kid that traded Constantine’s Soul contracts for Goddamn candy? How'd the kid even get those?

Back in the Batcave Bruce was confused. Why had Constantine fled? Danny didn’t do anything? He hoped that they would find their answers in Amity Park.

The next day, the family was taking a private plane. Bruce thought it would be best if the group went as civilians. The city wasn’t very suited to grapples and such, though they did have their suits in a hidden compartment in the plane. You can never be too sure, after all. Besides, the Waynes were in need of a vacation. That’s what rich people did after all. Danny was looking through the window, trying to see if he recognized anything yet.

‘Hey Danny, have you ever flown before?’

‘Of course, Uncle Dick! I fly all the time!’

At this, Danny floated up to the ceiling. Jason quickly grabbed him and put Danny on his lap. Can’t have him phasing outside.

‘Dick meant in a plane, kiddo. We know you can fly on your own. Have you ever flown in a plane before?’

‘Yeah! I did once with my mom! But the pilot jumped out of the plane and left me and mom to crash! He was dead too!’

Hoping to distract from that worrying statement, Duke asked Danny if he liked living in Amity, or if he didn’t remember.

‘I’m starting too. I do like it! It used to be really difficult, but not anymore! Now that everybody know that I’m dead, I don’t have to do my homework as much, and my parents don’t hunt me anymore, and my bullies don’t hit me either! But don’t tell anyone! It’s a secret, we don’t want the government to come and cut me open. So don’t tell the Guys in White, please!’

Bruce wrote down a memo to investigate these ‘guys in white’. Before he could ask Danny a bit more about it, the seatbelt lights came on. They had arrived in Amity Park.

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[avelera]

i agree with you and I don't like the Armand is alice theory. since Claudia died, we have 0 main female characters. This theory seems like an attempt to erase a minor female character who had an impact on a main male character life. Sometimes I felt like the iwtv fandom is hostile toward female characters. It also remind the fan that Daniel wasn't a good husband or a good father and a very flaw character who hurt a lot of women, not in a criminal way but he was surely an asshole. In fanfic, he doesn't have any flaw and is often victimize. The fan wants him to be a Marius hater, when himself forced a girl to put a paperbag on her head to have sex with her. She cried a lot but he didn't stop. I don't think he's aware of concept like "consent" or sexual assault. He was mostly a cheater with his wifes and an absent father to his daughters. And I feel like the fandom can't accept this so 1) they erased Alice 2) they made all his life about Armand when it wasn't. Because no matter how his life was, how he was a sexist asshole, it was the life he chose and Armand was a part of it but not the center. I like him, but not everything is about Armand and he's not Armand's savior or Armand's redemption or Armand's soulmate.

I think there's a lot of valid points in what you're saying!

I think fandoms in general have a tendency to polish off the rough edges of their favorite characters and Daniel is absolutely going to get this treatment by the fandom. It's pretty much inevitable but I don't blame people for doing it in their fanworks, that's just how fandom works.

I completely agree that a tendency to make Daniel's whole life about Armand would be a disservice to the character, especially Old Man Daniel who has lived a rich life on his own and if he had a relationship with Armand in the 70s, he's had half a lifetime or more since to live completely independent of Armand (perhaps thanks to Armand wiping his memory of that relationship, perhaps not). Regardless, it's a pretty common angle for fandom to take, especially when shipping two characters. The focus will be on the relationship and so the focus will be on making that relationship central to who they are often to the exclusion of all else. Certainly as maker/fledgling, these two ARE going to mean a lot to each other going forward too. But yeah I agree that erasing Alice or making Alice Armand is a denial of the long, independent and complicated life that Daniel lived completely without Armand.

But I also completely agree that Daniel was, canonically, not a good husband or father. He admits it himself. It's at the absolute core of who IWTV Show Daniel is. It's at the heart of his acerbic personality, his regrets, his terror at the thought of dying because he will be dying alone and unloved, and his relentless pursuit of the truth with Louis and Armand because he thinks the only thing valuable about himself that he has left is his skills as an investigative reporter. He has by his own admission fucked up every personal relationship he's had by being a complete asshole but that asshole flaw in his personal life was a virtue in his professional life. He is a relentless investigative reporter in part because he's a complete asshole. He wasn't able to shut that part of himself down when he was with his loved ones and that's why he has no one he loves in his life who wants to be around him, but he is still an award winning journalist. It's to me what makes him an interesting and complex character. If you polish that away, if you make him nice rather than a flawed man who is trying to do better (until maybe he's not, once he's a vampire) I'm not even sure why you'd be writing his character instead of an OC, it is what makes Bogosian's Daniel unique even as compared to the book version of the character.

The whole point of IWTV is that these characters are complex and they are ugly, they are monsters and they are human, and as Santiago says we should remember that when we put them on trial. This is a central theme of the show. This theme extends to Daniel too. Claudia is a victim of her horrible circumstances but she's also a bonafide serial killer of thousands of innocents. Louis is a soulful and tormented person who also murdered his way through the San Francisco gay population in the 70s as viciously as any epidemic. Madeleine was a collaborator during WWII and as much as we might debate how much of a choice she had in being one if she wanted to survive in WWII Paris, she was also completely unbothered by the idea of becoming a serial killer in order to gain immortality.

We are being asked by the show to hold the dichotomy of these characters in our heads, we are being asked to love them as humans and be horrified by them as monsters at the same time. Anyone who tries to polish the rough edges off these characters by having them be moral paragons is, I think, entirely missing the point of the gothic moral complexity of the show. No one is innocent, not even the interviewer. Daniel was an asshole to his loved ones. We can still feel for the fact he's afraid of dying, either to his chronic illness or to the vampires he's interviewing. That isn't something to be avoided by the viewer, that is the exact complexity we're being asked to engage with. Then again, fanworks serve a different purpose so people should do whatever they want with the characters there, this is just to say that the core story that I think is what attracted many people to IWTV is about moral complexity and it's a shame when that element is removed, at least when it comes to my personal enjoyment as I can't speak for others.

There are a couple things I disagree with though with what you said or want to address with a bit more nuance below the cut.

I don't think the fandom is hostile to women as such. I admit, I don't really know it well enough to say one way or another, but I'm always hesitant to apply such a sweeping criticism of a large group of people. M/M slash fandoms tend to focus on the male characters, it's just how it is. But IWTV gave us a beautiful f/f relationship with Claudia and Madeleine and I see a lot of appreciation of them and their relationship on my dash. Fact is, there's just not as many female characters as male characters in the Vampire Chronicles by at least 2:1. So naturally the fandom will focus on the male (and more importantly surviving) characters.

As for Marius, I don't think we have an answer about him yet within the show. What we have is that Louis called Marius Armand's pimp and we have show Armand telling us that Marius was his whole world but also that Marius prostituted him to visiting friends.

That is completely contrary to what we learn about Marius in "The Vampire Lestat" and "The Vampire Armand" books. If it's true, it's an invention of the show. Marius in the books specifically allowed Armand total autonomy in his sex life after he freed him from the brothel because he wanted Armand to have a full life before he became a vampire and Marius even then was very resistant to turning Armand or indulging in Armand's crush on him, and the only reason he turned him as young as he did was because Armand was dying. So until we get a more objective answer about what Marius and Armand's relationship was, not as it's told to us during a vicious fight between Louis and Armand or a very complex moment of self reflection tinged with bitterness, I am hesitant to say Marius is a villain in the way the fandom has decided he is.

However, if the show decides that based on Marius's actions in the book, the richer exploration in their reinterpretation of his character is that he had a highly questionable, even groomer relationship with Armand, I'd be all for it. It's a completely valid interpretation of the character in a reexamination of the text and one I trust these writers to bring a lot of complexity to. But I do think it's going to be more complicated than it appears based on the two mentions of Marius we've had so far because everything in the show has been more complex than it seems. Marius is 90% a protagonist in the book, he's one of the most universally beloved vampires in the entire vampire world for his wisdom, his humanity, his care for others, and for taking on the duty of caring for Akasha and Enkil when it was a very dangerous and tedious thing to do with little reward besides survival (and he was almost killed over it too multiple times). So it's a BIG change to make him a villain to a modern audience by making him Armand's abuser instead of his patron and inspiration (until they were cruelly separated) as he was in the books. I'm curious to see how they handle it once Marius is cast.

Now, how Daniel and Marius are going to interact is going to be based on the complexity of how we see Marius objectively in the show, outside of the flashbacks, in my opinion. I'm very curious to see how that turns out but again, remember these characters are monsters. I think assuming that Daniel's reaction to Marius will be 100% negative is premature.

And one more thing I disagree about is the idea that Daniel doesn't know what consent or sexual assault is (unless it was a typo and you were referring to him in the past, not in the present?).

I think Daniel has deep regrets about how he treated that girl when they were both teenagers, and he has deep regrets about how he treated his wives and his daughters. I believe he is haunted by these parts of himself. So I disagree with the characterization of him as being somehow unaware of consent or sexual assault. I believe that the incident with the girl when they were both teenagers was a particular shameful, ugly memory that Armand dug up specifically because it was an ugly, shameful memory of a time that Daniel was cruel and monstrous that he still feels shame about to this day. Armand dug it up not because it was something Daniel thinks is fine that he did, it's something that disgusts Daniel about himself.

But it's also, not to excuse it, but it's a story from when he was young and stupid, not a pattern of behavior we see coming up to the modern day. This is something that haunts him and that he's learned from. Old Daniel is a man who has been an asshole and who has learned a lot of lessons from it, mostly in that he gained many regrets in his life. But Old Man Daniel is introduced to us as someone who remains an investigative reporter because he wants to do some good for the world. It's the one thing he has to offer the world as he is dying. He views his job as a reporter as a sacred trust and we open with him talking about the ethics of investigative reporting. From that I think we can deduce that Daniel is very aware of consent and things like assault and just why what he did as a teenager was wrong. In his way, I think he sees being a reporter as him trying to be a good person.

[pant--eater]

what do you think fry's family is like!!! i love him sooo much every time you draw him it's like a gift 🥺🥺🥺

WAUGHGHGHJ these Fry questions make me so happy since he's my Blorbo(TM) <3 Gah I'm itching to talk about him, so ask and you shall deserve!! Also thank you SO much I'm so glad you love my art <33

little sketches related to what I'm about to yap about. ANYWAYS here's wonderwall

So on my old account I used to hc he is Indian-British, whose family hails from Travancore (Kerala nowadays). This was based on what I ASSUMED was canon info since back in January, all Chicken Run wiki articles about him mentioned he's Indian-British. But apparently that's not 100% settled info what his ethnicity is?? And the wikis have been edited since. His VA Nick Mohammed is from a mixed Cypriot/Indo-Trinidadian family though and I spent time reading about Indian-British immigrant history to get Fry's characterization accurate, so imma keep with that hc.

Anyway! I headcanon Marcus is the only child of wealthy businessmen that owned a highly successful trade company. His Vaishya grandparents moved to Britain during the late Victorian era; after all one of the only ways a PoC family could make it back then in Britain was by being filthy rich, and very early on the Fry family had been forced to adopt a "British" way of living in order to be taken seriously by the shitass imperial society. Such as switching to a British surname and avoiding to display too much of their original culture in public. A colonial trauma that still prevails, since Fry's parents christened him with a heavily English name.

I REEEALLY wanna give a try to designing Fry's parents sometime!! But I imagine his parents as sort of a healthier parallel to Melisha's parents; his father is a pristine and calm gentleman with a soothing voice and a love for theatre and literature (a trait that Marcus inherited LMAO) while his mother is more stern, headstrong and very, VERY proud of her status. (but she also has a infectuous smile and laughter and has a bombastic overdramatic streak...something that Fry inherited as well)

They're both native Malayam speakers, and while their family in public strives to keep Keralite culture hidden, they made sure to teach Marcus to speak his native language fluently as well, along with Hindi, Bengali, Tegulu and Tamil. Along with that, they frequently go on family trips to Travancore and enjoy things like inji neer, Kathakali performances (which inspired Fry on his love for theatre <3) and Carnatic music.

Both parents pushed Marcus to study hard and gain multiple academic degrees - it was all out of love and concern, because they wanted Marcus to be able to survive in the cruel world out there without only relying on his money. (Once again, a PoC immigrant family experience that I can identify with as well... even if society nowadays is not nearly as racist as it was back then, unfortunately PoC people are often forced to study waaaay harder than white people in order to make it.) Because they had lived through the years of great depression in the 1930s, and while they managed to survive with most of their wealth intact, they knew that one should not rely only on money for support since anything could happen.

Fry, as a child, was a gifted A+ grade student and a very well-behaved, so his parents called him a little ray of sunshine and a future hope. He yearned to be perfect so his parents would never be disappointed in him. Something that later on contributed MASSIVELY to Fry's gifted child burnout, and how he adopted a sinister, sadistic fascination with mind control and manipulation during his Cambridge years.

Once Marcus came out as trans and genderfluid to his parents, his father was very patient and accepting, but his mother spent several years in denial before finally accepting him. Not directly out of transphobia - but because she was afraid that Marcus would be discriminated, attacked and hurt by people, and that he should focus first on building a career for himself instead of bringing a bad name to the Fry family like this, with an outrageous gender identity. But she soon realized that hiding himself would only hurt her child on the long run. Also - the way Fry managed to fully bribe (cough mind control cough) British officials to switch the gender in his personal info and passport was nothing less than impressive to both of his parents LMFAOOOO and they're very proud

However despite all of this, Fry retains a loving relationship to his parents!! He goes to their mansion every Christmas, and they're also VERY accepting and encouraging to his marriage to Melisha. In fact, his mom was relieved to see Fry had married a very orderly, stern and no-nonsense woman, because Marcus had always been a scatterbrained mess and a reckless money-spender. He made a wonderful scientist, but business-running had never been his thing, so Melisha taking care of all that is like a lottery win to the Fry parents. ESPECIALLY since Melisha came from a poor household - a woman like this, who knows what it's like to live at the rock bottom, surely knows to keep Marcus humble and not let him make flimsy business decisions!! (either way Melisha is still a bit intimidated by Fry's mom, which says a lot considering what kind of a girl Melisha herself is LMFAO)

Pluuuus... the Harsh Expectations(TM) is something that Melisha can relate to </3 It's something that catches her entirely off guard, when she learns this detail about Fry's past. After all, the silly goofy doctor is like an endless ray of sunshine, he's rich and successful. (and we all know what Melisha's mother told her about money bringing happiness...) How could he ever have any worries or feelings of inferiority??

It's a detail that makes (in my hcs) Melisha fall even deeper in love with Fry and become tenfold more protective over him :''') <3 Once she realizes what a horrific burden this goofball is carrying on his back, and yet he still finds the energy every day to stay positive, be optimistic and support Melisha during her hard days.