#narcissistic personality disorder

[narcissisticpdcultureis]

Low-empathy NPD culture is learning how to perfectly word apologies in a way that pleases the receiver... even though you don't mean any of it.

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[npdmammon]

i don't know if it's the perpetual victim mentality i operate from but i feel like egotypicals get away with so much shit just because their personality and temperament aren't disordered.

it comes with the territory but i've done some pretty messy stuff in the midst of an episode, in a crash, in a rage, whatever you wanna call it, but all of it is held over my head like a taunt, stuff that occurred literally years ago, stuff i've tried to make amends for and actually made the effort to change from doing stuff like that again just for people to harp on and on about my missteps and dangle it over my head.

any progress i try to make just feels pointless and useless because it feels like no matter how much i try to change the behaviour, people will always just see me as the evil asshole in every single fucking situation and don't even entertain the idea that i'm not always doing things maliciously.

i tell people that of course always hold me accountable but that i genuinely can't help some stuff but when i try to explain "hey i have a disorder that curbs my emotional development and ability to handle conflict in a healthy way, and also makes me prone to defensiveness and combativeness and it's a maladaptive coping mechanism i learned from being abused" then they go "oh, typical narcissist, they always make excuses"

like i don't know if it's a reach but i feel like people with stigmatised disorders are put under a lot more scrutiny and are taken at their face value and never have excuses made for them the same way egotypicals are. i've had some pretty vile stuff flung at me by people without npd but it's ok because "everybody says things in a temper." like ok why can't i have the same courtesy.

[narcpocalypse]

Hello fellow narcs that have v high grandiosity I care u. However when I read ur posts I'm like DAMP I am the complete opposite most of the time. I do experience grandiosity very much so but I'd like to call myself a "downer" narc if that makes sense. My experiences are mostly depressive and full of crashes. When I see other narcs talk about how they value themselves highly and feel better than others most of the time I totally understand just from an episodic temporary perspective. I only feel this way consistently when I'm actively self destructive and getting high off it/experiencing psychosis/EXTREMELY enraged and blinded by that rage. Most of the time I feel like a lil crumb and would never even think of viewing myself as highly as others do UNLESS I'm experiencing what I said before. But I also don't wanna be pitied when I feel like a crumb like I will kill u if u do/lh. But for real I'm just irritable and tiny

OH and also I feel like I can't openly talk about myself highly for the things I do "unhealthily" praise about myself that isn't episodic because then I'd drop the front. Me? Grandiose? Please, I'm humble!!!!

LMFAO

Like there are some things that I'm like oh yeah I'm #exquisite but even then I hurl at the fact that I could ever view myself that highly when there's always someone to 1 up me

Sorry if this is confusing I'm a walking contradiction

[cubegore]

ohhh my god im so late but

happy late npd awareness day (june 1st)

[solitaryschizoid]

neurotypicals will be like "you can't self diagnose" and then diagnose everyone they dislike as a narcissist

[kitten-forward]

[equalperson]

i think we should always take predominant sexes and races for psychiatric disabilities into question.

are men really more likely to be antisocial or narcissistic, or are women just overlooked because ASPD/NPD are seen as too "aggressive" for them?

are women really more likely to be borderline or histrionic, or are they just seen as so "hysterical" that they have to be feminine?

are black people more likely to have schizophrenia or ODD, or are labels of "psychosis" and "defiance" simply used to further dismiss, oppress, and imprison BIPOC?

are white people more likely to have autism and ADHD, or are doctors just more willing to accept that white children are disabled and not just "bad?"

oppressive biases are everywhere in psychiatry. never take psychiatric demographics at face value.

[thecatspasta]

Inspired by @arrgh-whatever's post on helping ppl with BPD

Edit bc I forgot to add this: Being vulnerable means smth different for different ppl, something that could read as being vulnerable to you can read as just another Tuesday for someone else

[ID: a simply-drawn comic, narrated by a person coloured-in in pink.

Panel 1: The pink person narrates: "So there's a lot of "signs your ex is a narcissist and how to deal with them" and it's not very accurate. So here's how to actually "deal" with a narcissist from someone with narcissistic personality disorder."

Panel 2: This panel has the heading: "1. Supply." The pink person narrates: "People with NPD have very fragile self-esteem, and supply is what keeps us from having a mental breakdown. Supply can be many things, but often attention and praise are effective. Stuff like "Wow! That's super cool!!" can go a long way." A person is shown saying this to another person, who smiles.

Panel 3: This panel has the heading: "2. Criticism." The pink person narrates: "Oh boy. So narcissists take things as personal very easily. It's because if anyone contradicts our delusions that we have built our entire self-image on, it feels like you are attacking us as a person." There is an example shown, where one person says "hey, you were a bit too rude back there," but the other person hears "You're an awful dick no-one likes." The alternative manner of phrasing is suggested as "Hey, you were a bit too rude. You're cool, but some people took it poorly." The second person in this example thinks "I'm still a cool person. It's not my fault, but I can do things to be better." The narrator continues, "We don't really understand the concept of a harmless mistake."

Panel 4: This panel has the heading: "3. Boundaries." The pink person narrates: "With narcissists, setting down strict boundaries is very important. 1. Knowing we have hurt you because you didn't set down boundaries can really upset and annoy us because the delusions that we can do no wrong and know you best get broken. 2. If you let us break boundaries, it can lead us to see you as "weak" and devalue you. Communication is key."

Panel 5: This panel has the heading: "4. Anger." The pink person narrates: "So people with NPD tend to be prone to anger. This is a defense mechanism, because to us, it's either facing the inaccuracies of our delusions and having a mental breakdown, or blaming something else. We do not mean to lash out; we just don't have the skills to cope properly. You can help by: 1. Letting us express out emotions without judgement; 2. giving us praise or attention; and 3. Distracting us from what angered us." Each example of how to help is accompanied by a small cartoon.

Panel 6: This panel has the heading: "5. Other NPD things!" The pink person narrates: "'Love bomb, devalue, discard' is actually: we are genuinely obsessed with you and want you to recognize us as cool, we lose that obsession and move on, we feel threatened in some way and lash out. We can't really handle being seen as vulnerable. We take sympathy and empathy as pity and pity as you telling us we're weak. Not acknowledging we're being vulnerable and acting as if nothing is wrong can be helpful in these situations. People with NPD have a very warped view of reality. We do not mean to hurt you and often do not realise we have. Remember, this won't work for everyone, and talking is very important."

/end ID]

Ty to @aromanticsky for the id

[doomsdayradio]

HELP THE TIKTOK ABLEISTS ARE SAYING NARCS EYES CAN STRAIGHT UP GO BLACK⁉️⁉️⁉️

bro they think we're mythical fucking demons im done😭😭😭

[youlookkindadead]

i've seen quite a bit of confusion about this, so let me attempt to clear things up :

empathy is the ability to feel somebody's emotions as though they are affecting you personally. for example, somebody tells you "my dog died last night!" -> you now feel as though you've lost a pet personally -> you feel grief and sadness just like the other person. not everyone has empathy. it's a trait some people develop and others don't. some have high empathy, some have low empathy, some (like me) have none.

sympathy is the ability to understand and care about somebody else's struggles, even if you don't feel them yourself. so, somebody tells you their dog died -> you realize how this affects them emotionally -> you care about this person, and are upset that they are suffering. not everyone has sympathy either! it's a scale, just like empathy.

compassion is doing something to relieve another person's suffering or make them feel better. somebody tells you their dog died -> you don't want them to remain upset -> you come up with ways to help them feel better, like offering comfort and distractions, or other forms of support. compassion is a learned trait, not something you can be born with like empathy or sympathy. anyone can learn to be compassionate, although some may struggle more with it than others; it's a skill, just like anything else.

however, none of these are required to be a good person. that's a choice you make on your own accord. i hope this clears things up!

[narcissisticpdcultureis]

npd culture is i need to be worse i need to get worse my symptoms need to be more extreme i need people to notice me and to be on the same level as all the other mentally ill people i need to be special my suffering needs to be the most pleeeeeaeaeaeaaaseeeeeee dies - 👑☀️

.

[kindnessoverperfection]

Please, if you can, take a moment to read and share this because I feel like I'm screaming underwater.

NPD (Narcissistic Personality Disorder) stigma is rampant right now, and seems to be getting progressively worse. Everyone is using it as a buzzword in the worst ways possible, spreading misinformation and hatred against a real disorder.

I could go on a long time about how this happened, why it's factually incorrect (and what the disorder actually IS), why it's harmful, and the changes I'd like to see. But to keep this concise, I'll simply link to a few posts under the cut for further reading.

The point of this post is a plea. Please help stop the spread of stigma. Even in mental health communities, even around others with personality disorders, in neurodivergent "safe" spaces, other communities I thought people would be supportive in (e.g. trans support groups, progressive spaces in general), it keeps coming up. So I'm willing to bet that a lot of people on this site need to see this.

Because it's so hard to exist in this world.

My disorder already makes me feel as if I'm worthless and unlovable, like there's something inherently wrong and damaged about me. And it's so much harder to fight that and heal when my daily life consists of:

Laughing and spending time with my friends, doing my utmost best to connect and stay present and focused on them, trying to let my guards down and be real and believe I'm lovable- when suddenly they throw out the word "narcissist" to describe horrible people or someone they hate, or the conversation turns to how evil "people with narcissistic personality disorder" are. (Seriously, you don't know which of your friends might have NPD and feels like shit when you say those things & now knows that you'd hate them if you knew.)

Trying to look up "mental health positivity for people with npd", "mental health positivity cluster bs", only to find a) none of that, and b) more of the same old vile shit that makes me feel terrible about myself.

Having a hard time (which is constant at this point) and trying to look up resources for myself, only to again, find the same stigma. And no resources.

Not having any clue how to help myself, because even the mental health field is spitting so much vitriol at people with DISORDERS (who they're supposed to be helping!) that there's no solid research or therapy programs for people like me.

Losing close friends when they find out, despite us having had a good relationship before, and them KNOWING me and knowing that I'm not like the trending image of pwNPD. Because now they only see me through the lens of stigma and misinformation.

Hearing the same stigma come up literally wherever I go. Clubs. Meetings. Any online space. At the bus stop. At the mall. At a restaurant. At work. Buzzword of the year that everyone loooves loudly throwing around with their friends or over the phone. Feels awesome for me, makes my day so much better/s

I could go on for a long time, but I'm scared no one will read/rb this if it gets too much longer.

So please. Stop using the word "narcissist" as a synonym for "abusive".

Stop bringing up people you hate who you believe to have NPD because of a stigmatizing article full of misinformation whenever someone with actual NPD opens their mouth. (Imagine if people did that with any other disorder! "Hey, I'm autistic." "Oh... my old roommate screamed at me whenever I made noise around him, and didn't understand my needs, which seems like sensory overload and difficulty with social cues. He was definitely autistic. But as long as you're self-aware and always restraining your innate desire to be an abusive asshole, you're okay I guess, maybe." ...See how offensive and ignorant that is?)

Stop preventing healthcare for people with a disorder just because it's trendy to use us as a scapegoat.

If you got this far, thank you for reading, and please share this if you can. Further reading is under the cut.

NPD Criteria, re-written by someone who actually has NPD

Stigma in the DSM

Common perception of the DSM criteria vs how someone may actually experience them (Keep in mind that this is the way I personally experience these symptoms, and that presentation can vary a lot between individuals)

"Idk, the stigma is right though, because I've known a lot of people with NPD who are jerks, so I'm going to continue to support the blockage of treatment for this condition."

(All of these were written by me, because I didn't want to link to other folks' posts without permission, but if you want to add your own links in reblogs or replies please feel free <3)

[dodgeryy]

GUYS FUCK THEY FIGURED IT OUT WHAT DO WE DO

[cupboard-of-npd]

Hi hello narcissists and friends, Ive just discovered june 1st is 'World narcissistic abuse awareness day' I propose we be horribly horribly annoying on this day and make it to spread awareness on how narcissistic abuse isnt real

I think we can ruin an ableists day if we try hard enough whos with me

[autopsyfreak]

tired of people on tiktok acting like BPD and HPD are the ‘good cluster b disorders’ or the ‘victim cluster b’s’ meanwhile NPD and ASPD are the ‘evil mean abusive cluster b’s’

stfu.

we’re in the same cluster for a reason, you can’t support some whilst demonising the others.

[necroticcadaver]

Do not claim to be a mental health advocate or a safe space for the mentally ill if you demonise systems, cluster B personality disorders and/or psychotic disorders.