#no clue where my seizures came from

[dark-twist-fairytales]

Okay, Bizzaro boys rambling time:

All of this information and headcanon formation comes from a lot for different sources. Primarily late-night Ao3 readings and one image set that I can't get out of my head but have NO CLUE where it is or who made it.

I'm putting it under a cut, this shit will get lengthy.

So, in terms of HOW the Bizzaros are and came to be, this goes heavily on an AU that I don't remember who created it, but pretty much the Bizzaros are a counter-universe to the Ninja. (Credit due, it was a Tumblr user)

I'm taking in on that, but also adding a few things: -They have their own memories and past life. -They have their own family and relations to each other. -They're almost the exact opposite of the ninjas.

Now, here's it laid out in terms of each character: We'll go from A to Z:

--

Bizzaro Cole starts off as much as Cole is but more: Very cocky, very stubborn, and very destructive. As time goes on, away from the ninja, he becomes less of a follower and more of a leader. Turning stoic, easily annoyed, but very stratigic and smart. He keeps a monitor on his fellow Bizzaros' health (physical), goes headfirst into combat strategy, and knows how to push buttons to get on people's nerves. In other words: A humanized bastard cat. Him and Cole would not get along too well, given for how protective B!Cole is and how laid back Cole is, they're two bulls ready to butt heads at times.

-

Bizzaro Jay starts off very flirty and very destructive craving, with hints of emotional instability. With time passing, a lot comes out about Jay. Primarily, a large regard of health issues. Muscle spasms, absence seizures, POTS (Postural Orthostatic Tachycardia Syndrome)- This comes with a large regard of worry for Jay's health, despite how many times he'll dismiss it. He turns very closed off and calculated, barely giving any emotional regard. Jay and him would NOT get along. With Jay's excitable nature mixing with B!Jay's Not Impressed nature, they'd struggle.

-

B!Kai starts with a very leadership, very protective nature towards the others, cocky about their abilities. With time, however, Kai practically caves in on himself. Emotional, anxiety ridden, and a people pleaser. It doesn't matter who it is or what they want, he'll do it. But, with the twist of a dime, with the right buttons pushed, he turns into a pyromatic and destructive being with fire abilities. This is where Cole's button pushing comes in handy, being able to get Kai to that destructive point and beyond. This does lead to an overcharged burnout afterwards. Him and Kai.. Oddly work together. Given that B!Kai is very quiet and will listen to what other's say, Kai doesn't find him a bother. Still, Kai would get jumpscared by how quiet B!Kai is.

-

Bizzaro Zane is.. Well, he starts off crazy and reckless, and that only amps up the less his spent and compared to Zane. One of his catchphrases being "Logic? What's the point in logic?!". Yes, Cole has a child leash. Yes, Zane is more often the one to have it on. Yes, Zane is very irritated by this. To put it lightly: Zane goes headfirst into battle without knowing what the battle is. He is a nindroid, yes, but treats himself like he's a human being rather than a killer robot. Him and Zane, they.. Uh.. Well, it's not the worst friendship ever? I mean, if you ask B!Zane, you'd get a bit of chaotic high praise. If you Zane, you're met with the most annoyed and exhausted expression that could be displayed on any living thing.

-

Their powers are darkened/purple versions, aside from Cole, his still being rocks and whatnot, but more of gems and geodes rather than pure earth.

Asking about a Bizzaro Nya is met with a lot of stilled silence and a solid threat of 'Never mention her', along with Kai stowing away for a couple of hours.

They tend to listen more to Sensei Gamardon more than Sensei Wu.

When I tell you that these boys can and will be traumatized by living in good Ninjago AND from a made-up past, they are.

[isleofdarkness]

Ok so how did the meeting between Maverick and Ben go?

Well, this first one has gone to the absolute dogs, so here's their first meeting with Ben as king and Maverick (unhappily) as Destiny.

Warnings- a lot of swearing, mentioned seizure, mentioned severe child abuse

"You know." Ben's blood froze at that voice and his heart stopped when he whipped around and saw the person he knew it belonged to. Maverick Mim was leaning in one of the Isle's dingy alleyways in her grey tunic outfit, eyes completely black and book chained to her wrist. She gave him a look so disappointed it was cutting. "My opinion of you wasn't very high, but I thought you had more damn sense than to come to the Isle unarmed and unguarded."

"Maverick, thank the gods-" Maybe she could update him on Riah's condition after he'd been shot.

Maverick waved a hand, cutting him off. "You should be begging the gods get get me away from your dumb ass after what you did. Sending them back to the Isle knowing what their parents would do to them? Mal and Evie were lucky to survive their mothers, Carlos is barely any better, Riah's damn lucky I got to him before Maleficent because Hades isn't on the fucking Isle anymore, and Jay's still unaccounted for. Our best chance is gonna be Mal, if she wakes up from the coma. And let me tell you about this fucking winter in summer shit-" She waved around, glaring at the snow as though it had personally offended her. "Let me tell you what your daddy's idiocy did to Mara because no, Riah's not the one doing this-"

She snapped her fingers and the ground beneath them opened up, the earth underneath giving away- no dropping. Dropping like an express elevator. Maverick rounded on him, looking ready to slam him upside the head with her book. "Because my brother had to interfere, magic came onto the Isle. Not a tiny bit- the barrier fucking shattered. Mara, as I predicted, had her worst seizure yet. Nearly an hour! If not for her selling her soul to me, she'd be dead. She's barely alive even so and the natural order is fucked, that's why it's snowing in fucking May. Mordred's working on repairing the damage but you know what would help that move on a lot faster? If Riah were there because he's the one who's Death, not Mordred. Riah's a vital piece in not only ending this winter but also in maintaining the natural order that's hanging on by a thread at this point."

"So it sounds like we both want Riah to recover," Ben tried, mind reeling from all of the information she was giving him. It was still hard for him to wrap his head around Riah being the next incarnation of Death and Maverick being the next incarnation of Destiny. "How is he?"

"As if I would fucking know!" Maverick shouted, gesturing so harshly that she nearly laid him out. "My people weren't the ones who dragged him out of the massacre, it was your dad's men! Unless I check the book and read it aloud, which would monumentally fuck everything over, I have no clue where they took him! As for if he's okay, we can all feel that he's going to die! The bullet is still in and the wound is untreated and it doesn't seem like your dad is gonna do jack fucking shit about that! If we don't find out where he is, your dad is going to kill Riah! And then you come waltzing onto the Isle like an absolute fucking fool- bitch, you read the Book, you know what happens on the Isle! How could you be stupid enough to put yourself in danger like that?!"

"I- I was-"

"You were fucking stupid, that's what you were." She turned away from him as the world around them lit up, illuminated by torchlight and some kind of underground bunker. Down here, Ben could see hundreds, maybe thousands, of people hunkered down in the huge room, like some kind of refugee camp.

That was what these people, most of them children, were, he realized. Refugees from this war his father had started.

"Now I have to find a way to get you out of here without being noticed and without leaving Mara alone under the barrier." Maverick sighed, anger melting into exhaustion. "I'll see what Harriet thinks I should do. Until then, Benny Boy, welcome to the Mile."

Later meetings will go better, but these first few are rough.

[faofinn]

No. 7 THE WAY YOU SHAKE AND SHIVER

@whumptober

@whumptober-archive

Shaking Hands | Seizures | Silent Panic Attack

The last thing Harrison expected to see wasn’t Taidgh seizing on the floor, but it was close. 

Tai wasn’t meant to have seizures, this wasn’t meant to happen. Using his phone to call an ambulance, he swiped Tai’s against his arm. 

1.2. Fuck. 

That explained that. He grabbed the emergency kit from the coffee table, trying to protect Tai as he did so. 

“Ambulance, is the patient breathing?”

“Not properly.”

“Is the patient conscious?”

“No. he’s a diabetic, he’s having a seizure from a hypo. His BM is 1.2 and going down, about to give his glucagon.”

“Alright, I’m arranging some help for you now, stay on the line for me and-”

Harrison zoned out slightly, occasionally humming a response. It was a struggle to hold his arm still, but he managed, apologising as he did so. He moved to Tai’s head, stroking his cheek as he waited for it to work. They’d never been this bad before, never been this low. His phone always lagged behind, too, so quickly checked manually. It was worse than he’d expected at 0.7, the lowest reading they’d had and the lowest Harrison had seen, even at work. 

“C’mon Tai, sort yourself out, pull this back, yeah?”

The shot seemed to finally be working, Tai’s seizure slowing and then stopping. Harrison rolled him more onto his side, trying to clear his airway now that he could. A quick swipe told him it was starting to raise, which was more than he’d expected. The ambulance was taking forever, they always felt like an eternity when you needed help. He kept murmuring to Tai, trying to reassure what little he was aware of.  

There was a knock on the door, and finally a shout. "Ambulance!"

"In here!" Harrison called back. "Just come through."

"Hi, can you tell us what's going on?"

"Uh, yeah. This is Tai, he's type one, normally well controlled. He was last seen half an hour ago, I came back fifteen minutes ago and he was seizing on the floor as you see him. His blood sugar was alarming on his phone, so he's obviously had a hypo - it was 1.2 when I swiped it. Gave the glucagon as I called you guys, and then checked manually too, it was 0.7."

"Sorry, zero seven?"

"Yeah." He let out a quiet laugh. "Zero. I've never seen it that low. Stopped seizing after the glucagon, about three minutes after? He's just starting to come round a bit. When he's been really low, he can get a bit aggressive, but he's just scared and confused."

They nodded. “Alright. I’m sure he’ll be more settled with you here, so you stick with him. You know him best.”

“He doesn’t mean it, he always feels shit for it when he comes round.” Harrsion kept talking, running his fingers through Tai’s hair. 

“Which is fair enough, really.”

“What’s his sugars at now?”

“1.3 now.” They said, after a quick moment to check.

“Oh, it’s coming up then.”

“It’s still not where I’d like it.”

“No, course not.” Harrison shook his head. “Least he’s easy enough to stick.”

“One of the better cannulas I’ve had today.”

“He’s got good veins.”

“Got one good thing going for him, then.” They joked, trying to put him at ease. “You work at George’s don’t you?”

“Yeah, was meant to be my day off, believe it or not.”

“Always the way.”

Taidgh gave a groan, uncoordinatedly trying to pull away from the hand holding his.

“Hey, Tai. You’re alright, just an idiot, eh?”

The paramedic smiled to themselves. “Alright, well done. It’s Tai, is it?”

Tai rolled onto his back, blinking at the paramedic. He had no clue what was happening, or who was talking to him, but he’d heard his name.

“Welcome back to the land of the living.” They said gently. 

Tai grunted, deciding to roll back onto his side, and trying to fall back asleep. He pulled his arm over his head, trying to hide himself from the light.

“Careful, Tai. You’re gonna pull your cannula.”

“Here, let’s have this arm.” The paramedic said gently. “Let me look after this, yeah?”

Harrison moved quicker than Tai did, gripping his arm to stop him swinging. “Gentle, Tai, they’re trying to help.”

“I’m sorry, Tai. I know it’s not nice.”

"How much of that glucose has he had?" Harrison twisted to look. "He's going to have to go in, right?"

“I’m afraid so. He’s responded really well to it, but given the seizure and how low he is, I’d like him to go in and get looked at properly.”

"Yeah, I thought so." He hummed, stroking Tai’s forehead. "He'll not be happy with that, bless him."

“Hopefully it won’t be for too long.”

"You're gonna be better off trying to move him sooner than later." He said, then looked up guiltily. "I'm not trying to tell you how to do your job, not at all, I've just had to do this a few times with him. He's got less chance of refusing treatment if he's strapped in the ambulance."

They smiled. “You’re not telling us how to do our jobs. You’ve got the experience with him, he’s your partner. I’d much rather do it the easy way - he’s a big guy and I’d rather not get punched today, this is my first shift of four and it’s going to suck working the rest with a black eye.”

Harrison managed a laugh. "He's got one heck of a right hook."

“I’d rather not find out for myself, if it’s all the same to you. And I doubt he wants to hurt me either.”

"He's soft as shite really."

Tai gave a snore in response, grumbling sleepily to himself as he tried, and failed, to get comfortable. Harrison smiled sadly, hating hope small and vulnerable Tai looked. The other paramedic had disappeared off to grab the trolley, leaving the other to redo Tai's obs.

"Oh, that's better. 2.1." The paramedic hummed. "Definitely responding to the glucose there. We'll give him the last 100 there, and get him off to hospital. Hopefully he'll be more with it in a little while."

When the other paramedic returned with their trolley, they were quick to get Tai up and onto it before he fought them too much. It was nicer for everyone if they did it that way. Soon enough, he was in the ambulance, and they were able to get going. 

Just as Harrison had said, Tai started to become more aware in the ambulance, his grumbles growing more coherent. 

"'ars?"

Harrison smiled, squeezing his hand. "Hey, love. You're alright."

"'urts."

"You had a bad hypo."

Tai hummed. That sort of explained that, but he had to admit he didn't really care.

“We’re going to get you looked at and feeling better.” The paramedic reassured. 

"'m better."

“Not quite better enough.”

"He's pretty sure he is." Harrison laughed.

"I am." Tai agreed, rubbing his face with his free arm. "My tongue hurts."

“Yeah, it will, you had a bit of a seizure.”

"That's Finn."

Harrison laughed again. “Not today.”

"Are you sure?"

“As sure as I can ever be.”

"Was I low?"

“Really low.”

"How low?"

Harrison didn’t want to scare him. “Uh, very low.”

"You're lying to me."

“I wish I was.”

"You won't tell me how low."

“At one point it was 0.7.” He admitted.

"Oh." That was low. His face screwed up as tears started to fall, and he pulled his hand from Harrison's to rub them away.

That was why Harrison hadn’t wanted to tell him. “It’s okay, it’s coming back up now.” He said gently, brushing his tears away.

"I feel rubbish. I didn't mean to."

“I know.”

"I tried."

“It’s not your fault, it happens. We’re looking after you.”

"I'm sorry."

“You don’t need to be sorry.”

[dr-shephcrd]

an emilio shepherd self para

when: the evening of the accident, after amelia was transported to sgmw 

where: well.. in a ct machine/ct machine room at seattle grace mercy west hospital 

who: amelia shepherd, elaine sawyer, sofia sloan-torres ( the gang is all here )

triggers: head injury, seizure, brain tumor

“Nothing quite like seeing my Head of Neuro in a CT machine and not being notified,” Elaine snapped, causing Sofia to jump in her chair at the woman’s sudden entry.

Sofia’s mouth fell open to speak, but nothing came out. Amelia was crystal clear when she said she wanted nobody around. Even though Elaine was standing right before her, and the cat was just about as out of the bag as it could get, Sofia was still ready to deny the fact like a child denying coloring on the walls with markers in her hand.

“Please go back to the pit, Doctor Sloan-Torres.”

Now that, that was enough to get Sofia to stand up. “This is my patient. I’m working with a patient right now.”

Narrowed eyes stared back at the younger surgeon, and Elaine couldn’t help but smirk a little. “Not anymore. Get your little nepotism ass back to the pit before I transfer you back to Hopkins. Am I clear?”

She sure was. Sofia was gone in the blink of an eye, and Elaine was studying Amelia’s chart closely while the machine whirred in the background. No signs of head injuries, unresponsive but awake for three minutes and twenty-six seconds, extremely disoriented. Elaine wasn’t a Neurosurgeon, but she had common sense. She was about ready to mouth off to Amelia, giving her shit for her inability to diagnose herself, just when the scans lit up on the monitors before her.

Elaine helped Amelia out of the machine, and Amelia must’ve been able to read the redhead’s expression immediately, because she sat up right away and glared at Elaine. 

“What’s wrong? Why’re you here? Where’s Sofia?”

“Nice to see you too.” Clearing her throat, Elaine shrugged, “she was needed back in the pit.” Her tone was softer than usual, and she was having a hard time keeping eye contact with Amelia. Before giving Amelia any time for questions, Elaine slipped her hands into the pocket of her cardigan, nodding toward the door for Amelia to follow her into the attached room. Pulling a chair closer to the one she was sitting in before, she began logging back into the computer. 

Amelia knew things weren’t okay. That was made clear by the fact that Elaine hadn’t just told her nothing was wrong and sent her home. She was waiting to hear about bruising, bleeding, anything. But instead, she was stuck in the silent room listening to Elaine’s nails on the keyboard.

“Two things,” Elaine spoke, breaking the silence. “First thing, you’re suspended from surgery, effective immediately. And the second thing, is, um.. did you know that you have a mass in your brain?” Elaine got the scans back up, tilting the monitor back to Amelia. Amelia’s expression said it all; the other surgeon had no fucking clue. Elaine sat silently for a few moments, mentally acknowledging that it was much easier to tell strangers that they had these sorts of things. “I guess.. you go home, now. It’s probably for the best that you don’t drive, given that it’s... you’re very prone to seizures. Which is what happened back at the scene, I’m guessing. But I’m not going to tell you that you can’t operate and can’t drive at once, that’s just mean, so do whatever.” Elaine glanced back at Amelia, raking her bottom lip between her teeth.

Amelia shook her head quickly. “You’re just going to clear me to go home now. And I’m going to go home. I’m not driving because my car’s not here.. not because you’re advising against it.”

Head nodding, Elaine looked back down at Amelia’s chart. This wasn’t a time for advice. She wasn’t going to tell Amelia that she needed to figure things out quickly, because Amelia wasn’t an idiot ( well, not entirely ). There was really nothing left for Elaine to say or do.

“And you’re not going to tell anyone about this.”

Red hair flipped over her shoulder as she turned to Amelia quickly, an insulted expression on her face. “Okay, whoa, I’m a massive bitch, but I am not a HIPAA violator, Shepherd." Elaine stood from the chair she was in, pushing it in under the desk. “I’ll see you tomorrow, I’m assuming, for consults. Because you doctors are the worst fucking patients. I’m not going to be extra nice to you either, by the way. Tumor or not, you’re still an ass and you piss me off.” Shrugging, Elaine left the room, closing the door behind her.

Which left Amelia alone in the dimly lit room, staring at the monitor. Staring at her brain. Her tumor. 

It’s fine.

[last-of-cheese]

Where do you feel like your consciousness lives in your body? Like where do you feel like “you” are in your body?

Anon you're making me think DEEP questions after I just came out of a seizure...

But umm I'd say my mind and my heart

But my power that... that comes from my forearms. My uncles always taught me that when I was little. Why? Not a clue but he did and it's still a thing even now that I'm 33 years old.

[topreviewin]

Basically the latest need to-look thriller on Netflix is Reptile, a cool-blooded whodunnit that has been called "ad infinitum charming" by viewers because it follows detective Tom Nichols (Benicio Del Toro) on his quest to solve the homicide of precise estate agent Summer (Matilda Lutz).Amongst the high suspects are Summer's boyfriend Will (Justin Timberlake), who came across her body, and her ex-husband Sam (Karl Glusman). Nonetheless because the investigation grows extra sophisticated, Nichols confides in his wife Judy (Alicia Silverstone) that he's origin to ask who in his dangle division he can also believe. And as he attracts ever closer to the truth within the lend a hand of Summer's homicide, even extra questions arise. Spoilers practice.Who killed Summer, and why?Within the supreme act of Reptile, it is printed that Summer turned into murdered as section of a quilt-up, to prevent her from speaking to the FBI about a legal conspiracy. And Nichols' preliminary suspicion turned into genuine: her boyfriend Will turned into involved... nonetheless so are about a of his closest colleagues."It is extra admire Rosemary’s Child, where you effect, 'Oh my God, they’re all involved,'" says director Grant Singer. "What Benicio’s character is coping with is that he realizes it’s necessary extra of a conspiracy, and that there’s necessary extra culpability from all these different these that he depended on."NetflixIt all comes lend a hand to Summer's job as a realtor. Her boyfriend Will and his mother were exploiting a apt loophole that enables for the seizure of property that has been occupied with a tablets raid so to develop a killing on the categorical estate market. One most main clue turned into when Nichols noticed a equipment of heroin which he acknowledged from an fully separate tablets bust: Will had been taking part with crooked police officers to place the arrangement going.When he finds out the truth, Nichols "is confronted with this correct dedication to develop the coolest part and sacrifice his stability, his livelihood, his occupation, or put his mouth shut," Singer says. "And he makes a dedication to develop the coolest part." And as for who particularly killed Summer? That is one detail the film never with out a doubt reveals. As a substitute, her blood is depicted as being on the fingers of all americans occupied with the scam, one extra casualty of the corruption that has permeated the police force."Regarded as one of the considerable issues I admire about movies is that they'll also be enigmatic, it's good to presumably perhaps presumably presumably sprint away viewers with questions," acknowledged director Grant Singer. "There’s a reason I’m leaving these questions unanswered."Philip EllisPhilip Ellis is Info Editor at Males's Health, covering health, pop custom, sex and relationships, and LGBTQ+ points. His work has appeared in GQ, Teen Vogue, Man Repeller and MTV, and he's the creator of Treasure & Other Scams.

[endmylifelad]

So I went on a date with a guy a couple days ago who I’ve like for a while. It was fun, we had fun, and then I made it the most embarrassing day of my life.

A little bit into it I started to feel really weird. My vision kept blurring and blending everything together and duplicating things and I was so thrown off. I didn’t want to say anything to him as we were having an enjoyable day and I didn’t want to ruin it.

One point I asked if we could go back to his car so I could grab my water bottle in hopes it would help.

Just made things 10x worse.

We sat at a picnic table and hung out with a squirrel, and it was just getting so much worse. Vision was crazy and my stomach hurt like a bitch and my head wasn’t right.

I kept thinking to myself, am I going to pass out? Am I going to have a seizure? Is this what it feels like before having one? I’ve had plenty of seizures and have had no warning of them happening. Just the aftermath. So I didn’t know if this was what it actually felt like.

That’s when I felt it.

I asked if he knew where the restroom was, and he pointed to it that was right next to us just a little way away.

I got up and headed for it. I was maybe 10 or less feet away from it before I turned and dashed to a bush.

I fucking 🤮

He held my water bottle and came over and asked if I wanted him to hold my hair. I just waved him off and said please turn around and go away.

I have no clue why this happened. What made my body be shitty

We left after that and he took me home. He was actually really sweet about it. When we got to my place I asked him to fill up my water bottle and headed downstairs quickly. I hung out in the bathroom for a bit. He came in and he asked if he could get me anything. Told him I’m fine and the only thing that helps is Sprite and I don’t have it because I don’t like Sprite. He left and I figured he finally was listening to me after I kept saying to go home.

He went to a store and came back with a 12 pack of canned sprite for me.

We watched Deadpool and he just hung out as I went back and forth to the restroom to empty my gut.

Again he was really kind, but it was absolutely humiliating and embarrassing for me.

[cassurrjoybell-30]

Bonding with the Enemy - Chapter 27

*Warning Adult Content*

Too Many Clues

The most worrisome part of seeing Holly was how pale she looked.

Before, her spirit was vibrant and indistinguishable from a living person.

Now, she was partially transparent with the color drained from her face.

She was so pale in fact that Darren thought that this time she might actually be a ghost but the small bit of pigment from her clothes reinforced that this was yet another astral projection.

Stumbling down the stairs, he stopped beside Jasper who tensed as their shoulders brushed.

"It's Holly," Darren pointed, forgetting that they wouldn't be able to see her.

Kenny immediately turned but when he saw nothing, he glared back.

"Are you serious right now? My daughter is missing and you're playing games?"

"No," Darren tried to explain.

"She's standing right there or at least her spirit is."

"SHUT THE FUCK UP," Beth snarled.

"You're taking this joke too far."

"He's telling the truth," Jasper quickly supported Darren's claim.

"You already know what kind of ability he has, so if he says he see's her ghost then..." he chose not to finish that sentence and looked morosely towards Kenny.

"I'm sorry."

Kenny's eyes widened as he stared back at Jasper in disbelief.

Then he collapsed down onto his knees.

It looked like his exhaustion, worry and fears had hit him all at once as tears began to silently stream down his face.

Beth kneeled beside him while the Alpha stepped up to put a hand on his friend's shoulder, assuming the worst.

"She's not dead," Darren sighed. 

Beth squinted.

"What do you mean, 'she's not dead?' How can you see her ghost if she's alive?"

"Because she's astral projecting," the rogue explained, keeping his eyes on the girl's form while Jasper let out a sigh of relief, having forgotten about her ability.

Slowly, he approached Holly.

The little girl quickly backed away from him, though she continued to shiver violently as she clutched her body for warmth.

He also noticed that her clothes looked damp.

"Hey Holly," he squatted down in front of the little girl, making himself appear as harmless as possible. "Can you tell me where you are?"

Holly opened her mouth but no words came out.

Instead, a shadow started forming behind her and as Darren watched, dark tendrils slithered their way around the girl's shoulders, solidifying into a pair of bony hands.

"Jared," the rogue grit, looking into the creep's sunken eyes.

Holly screamed silently, then vanished, leaving an unfazed Jared behind as he grinned towards Darren.

"Who's Jared?" Beth asked Jasper, who waved his hand to keep her quiet.

Jared started twitching violently.

The monster looked like he was having some sort of seizure as his hands and neck twisted into unnatural angles, then faded away.

Darren let out a breath that he didn't know he was holding but when he turned to explain himself to the others, he was met with Jared's grinning face just inches from his own.

"I'd hurry up if I were you," the spirit mocked.

"She works quick."

And with that cryptic warning, he disappeared again.

Confused by the ghost's words, Darren spun around, making sure the creep wasn't still latched onto the ceiling or some other dark crevice.

He didn't stop until he felt a hand on his shoulder, causing him to stumble backwards as he all but shit himself.

Jasper backed off immediately and waited for the smaller man to calm down.

"What happened?"

"Holly's not dead," Darren repeated himself.

"Wherever she is, it's cold and wet and..." He glanced towards Kenny, who was now eyeing the rogue with interest.

"And Jared's ghost is stalking her for some reason."

Jasper cursed under his breath, then remembered that neither of his Betas knew what Darren was talking about, so he took a moment to explain who the bastard was and that they needed an exorcist to get rid of him.

Darren did bring up that Gerrit supposedly already called the guy but it would take him a few days to get there.

"So my daughter's body has been dumped somewhere while her spirit is getting followed around by a pedophile?" Kenny croaked in horror.

"That means she's still alive," Darren tried to be encouraging.

"And now we have a chance to save her if we can figure out where she is."

"If we narrow down the search to places that are damp or cold, then I have a few ideas," Jasper perked up.

Beth shot to her feet.

"So do I."

"Wait," The rogue stopped them before they got ahead of themselves. "There's one more thing. Jared might have indicated that whoever is behind all of this may be a woman..."

"A woman?" Kenny muttered to himself.

"Are you sure?"

"Not entirely. As a matter of fact, knowing the guys history, he might just be leading us on a wild goose chase. But then again..."

He faced Jasper.

The Alpha quickly pulled out his phone and made a call to the police department.

Midway through, he was cut off and listened intently, then hung up and faced Darren.

The rogue didn't appreciate the look he was receiving.

"What is it?"

"The police said they have a suspect already. They arrested her yesterday for trespassing."

"Trespassing where?"

"There's a section of private properties in the woods. They said they found her snooping around without permission."

The rogue furrowed his brow in thought.

"A private property would be the perfect place to hide kids, especially if it's secluded in the woods."

The young Alpha put a hand on Darren's shoulder and squeezed.

Darren glanced at it, then up at Jasper.

"What?"

"Darren..." The Alpha started cautiously.

"It's Sophie."

He immediately ripped away from Jasper's grasp.

"Fuck that," he spat.

"She's my aunt. She's the one who invited me here to help. There's no way it's her."

Kenny suddenly stood.

"Isn't she that woman that was coming to Town Hall every day and demanding progress reports on the investigation?"

"Yeah," Beth nodded, seeming to understand what Kenny was thinking.

"She has no kids. If she did, then it would be understandable but even the parents aren't being as nosy as she is."

"It would make for a great cover story to say she was only sneaking around because she wanted to help find the missing kids."

"And even better if she brought a rogue into town because then everyone would be more suspicious of him than her."

The Betas both looked at Darren, who was now shaking his head violently.

"Absolutely not. Let me talk to her. I can prove it wasn't her."

At this point, Jasper tried to put a comforting hand on the irate rogue's shoulder, but Darren pulled away angrily.

"I want to see her NOW."

Seeing that he was inconsolable, the Alpha eventually agreed and they decided to let Beth and Kenny search for Holly while Jasper and Darren head towards the station.

By the time they arrived, Gerrit was already waiting for them.

Jasper had called him up so he could convince the sheriff to let Darren speak with his aunt ahead of time.

As soon as they got passed the waiting room, Darren flew down the hall, searching each cell until he found Sophie located in the back, wearing the same clothes from his vision. 

"Darren," she immediately pressed herself against the bars.

"How did you find out I was here?"

"Jasper, believe it or not," the rogue explained.

"What were you doing running around on private property?"

Sophie was about to answer, then spotted Gerrit jogging up, having been left behind when Darren sprinted ahead.

At the sight of him, she snapped her mouth shut.

Curiously, he glanced at the other man, then back at her.

"What is it?"

"Nothing," her hands began fidgeting nervously.

"I was just looking for places that the kids might be."

"Did you find anything?"

Once again, her eyes flew to Gerrit.

"No."

Darren looked at the man, wondering why she kept glancing his way.

Then he remembered earlier how Jared's ghost had pointed in the Gazebo.

'Was Jared actually pointing at Gerrit back then?'

So many questions were piling up but he didn't have time to answer them as he addressed Jasper once he finally caught up.

"We need to get her out."

"She was due to be released today anyways. This was just an overnight holding cell."

"Great, so get her out," he looked eagerly at the man, who sighed tiredly.

"Fine, I'll go talk to the sheriff."

"We should probably go with him," Gerrit suggested.

"As you know, he's not that great with paperwork."

Darren was about to agree, then began having second thoughts. 

You only need one person to fill out paperwork.

Why was he asking for Darren to go with him?

As a matter of fact, if she was already due to be released today, why would they need to fill out any paperwork?

"Wait, can I stay here while you guys do that?" he suggested instead.

Gerrit quirked an eyebrow.

"Sure. I'll see you in a bit."

He turned and wandered back up to the front.

Darren waited until the guy was out of sight and right when he was about to ask Sophie what she new, she suddenly grabbed him by the shirt and dragged him closer to the bars.

"Don't trust him."

"Who? Gerrit?" Darren asked.

"Why? What did you really see?"

"It was..."

"Hey."

An officer then approached and noticed how Sophie was latching onto Darren.

He hurried over and pried her fingers off.

"Stop that."

"It's okay." Darren tried to say but the damage was done and the officer peered suspiciously back at his aunt. 

"After that display, I'm not leaving you alone with her until she's released," he stated.

Darren looked helplessly at his aunt.

"It's fine," she said.

"They don't have anything to keep me for more than a day anyways. I'll talk to you then."

The rogue prepared to protest, then figured she might have a good reason for not wanting to talk in front of the officer.

Coming to an agreement, Darren left as he mulled over the situation.

All the clues indicated that whoever was taking the kids was someone they trusted.

After all, no sane person would get into a rusty red car if they didn't know the person driving it.

What's more, based on Holly's reaction to Darren, the kids were very cautious around strangers.

At first it would make sense to suspect Liam.

Everyone in the pack trusted him, plus he had the power to withdraw all search parties and act like nothing was wrong.

But what if that was all it was?

The Alpha did have a track record for avoiding bad press.

What if that was his real reason for trying to contain the investigation?

Then there was Jared's cryptic warning. 

He indicated that it was a woman.

But then, why Sophie?

What would she have to gain?

Even if he was able to suspect her, he couldn't figure out what her motive would be... Unless all the kids had powers, just like Holly.

Realization dawned on Darren, and he stopped mid step. 

That would explain why he hasn't seen a single one of their ghosts.

They weren't being murdered, they were being trafficked. 

Other packs would do anything to increase the number of Betas in their community.

The more Betas they had, the more powerful their pack would seem and grooming one from childhood would be much easier than bribing or threatening random rogues into joining.

He could only imagine how much an Alpha would pay for young Betas and it was well known that Alpha's were more than wealthy. 

He recalled how angry his aunt had been about his uncle being banned.

Sophie may act obedient but she already helped smuggle Darren out of the pack before, thus proving that she was willing to break the rules. 

'But then why did she tell him not to trust Gerrit?' 

Were they both working together?

Did they have a falling out?

When he thought about it, he didn't actually have any proof that Gerrit was in his room when Holly went missing.

For all he knew, the guy could have snuck out his window or something.

Gerrit was also a well known member of the pack, what with being the Alpha's son and all.

Plus he had access to all the same files and documents that Liam did.

He could easily manipulate the investigation from the inside. 

But something still wasn't quite adding up.

He shook his head, desperate for answers but unable to get any of them until Sophie was released.

So he continued his walk towards the waiting room.

Opening the door, he bumped into the last person he expected to see.

Despite having the guys back facing him, he recognized Liam's imposing figure instantly.

Darren blinked.

Then rubbed his eyes to make sure he was seeing properly.

The man looked the same as he did the day he disappeared.

As a matter of fact, he looked cleaner than before. 

Confused, he approached the Alpha with one hand protectively over his Collar and as he got closer, he realized the man was watching both Gerrit and Jasper sign something.

Unlike usual, Liam had a soft look on his face.

The rogue reached out just as he spoke.

"Maybe I sacrificed too much..."

Then, Darren's hand went straight through his form, causing his body to shimmer, then vanish.

The rogue stood, stunned, as he realized that in his surprise, he had failed to noticed how pale and transparent Liam was. 

Taking a deep breath to calm his nerves, he face the two men and wondered just how he was going to break the news. 

[theforgottenlittleprincess]

I tell my mom I don’t think lgbtqia people are going to hell and that I don’t think her god would have a problem with it, that I think if he doesn’t make mistakes and he made lgbt people, since it has after all been proven through science that we are born this way, thaaaaan… yeah… we wouldn’t go to hell it’s just logic… but she some how takes that as meaning I think I am more evolved and better than her and other christians and that i’m looking down on her and the rest of the family and the church… like… where tf did THAT come from?!!!

I am the LAST person who would look down on ANYONE… I mean for one I have no self esteem.. her and Nana kinda made sure of that… but.. even more so.. I don’t care what other people think… I mean that’s also why her bs story about not wanting me to be ostracized by out town if I came out as queer story was so absolutely ridiculous… for one everyone in our town decided I was gay back in elementary school, how that happened I have no clue, and no one cares including me…. But it’s kinda interesting how people are so open and accepting when you’re just nice to them… but also even if anyone had a problem I wouldn’t care. It’s their choice how to feel not mine. All I can do is choose how I let it effect me.. and for the most part acids from my family I really don’t care… but honestly I have to care when it comes to them because they have so much control of my life….

But… between me and y’all and the dog… IF i ever get tf out of here… I’m going to release my last flying fuck at the state line and never look back! You can put your money on that! Bet you my seizures will go down tooo… ugh I can feel one coming on again. Damn it! I’ll be back… wish me luck.. i’ll tag when I get back..

[crazywolf828]

Honestly even if I did want a kid I'd rather adopt one than have one. Forget about the pain and labor and all of that, just for the fact of how bad my genes are health wise. I would never want to force these issues onto someone I'm supposed to love and keep healthy my entire life. It's been hell to live with these things since I was a child, I know how bad it is, so why would I willingly pass them on to someone else? And I know, I know with adoption you don't always get the full medical history, but honestly it seems like such a better alternative.

[idiotwhotalkstoomuch]

How did everyone react to Yuus real age and connection to the great 7?

 MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA THANK YOU FOR ASKING CAUSE I ALREADY HAVE AN IDEA ON HOW THEY FOUND OUT 

Note: Some characters already knew her age and connection to the Great Seven so they will react to her appearance in NRC

Btw for looks she looks very generic hence why some boys who know her history overlooked her. (by generic like long brown hair, blue eyes and eyebags. I’ll show a picrew of how I intend her to look soon when I finally pick a favorite)

Also Yuu is royalty of the Valley of the Thorns. When I get back to writing everything will come together.

Also also I need more research to do all these characters properly but since everyone needs a reaction I asked my friend for help so if there seems to be a difference then yeah you know why.

How they found out

(Post overblot Riddle)

*in the infirmary*

Yuu: Relax I was only cut-

Sebek: *enters infirmary* Your Highness! Malleus-sama ordered me to check on you after the news of the overblot came out!

Ace: Wha-

Deuce: Y-your Highness!?!

Yuu: *chuckles*

Yes the scene is somewhat comedic but its just how it is. Me and my friend liked the scene better as a comedic one than a serious one as things get more serious later on so may as well keep up some humor.

HEARTSLABYUL

Riddle Rosehearts - Very shocked and ashamed. He knew of Yuu’s existence and actually read about her and her history as a child but couldn’t tell it was her on first glance because they’re meetings had him in a bad mood from troublemakers so he didn’t notice.

 Treats her with the utmost respect even if she tells him to relax. He’s very embarrassed that someone who’s been in the presence of all the Great Seven and befriended or in some cases raised them had to see him and the dorm in such a state.

Trey Clover - It came off as quite a surprise to him especially since he had been treating her like one of his kouhai. He’s one of the more relaxed about the reveal and will only ask if there needs to be changes in the way she’s addressed but overall their interactions are hardly affected. Though he will stop treating her like one of his kouhai as she is older than her by quite (*cough centuries*) a lot.

Cater Diamond - See this man had the advantage of putting a picture of him with Yuu in Magicam which definitely brought out someone who knew of Yuu.

He was pretty surprised to see a bunch of comments asking if that’s legit and was going to ask her about it but Unbirthday party preparations got in the way. Needless to say wanted another selfie with her on his Magicam to tell all his followers it’s legit and how he JUST found out.

Ace Trappola - Isn’t all too worried about it. He’s not one to care all too much about titles and all that stuff but he does take her age as something to tease her on.

When Grim and Deuce are annoying him or causing trouble, he’ll joke about how their troubling the “grandmother” and overall takes it without much effect on their relationship.

Deuce Spade - Is shook beyond belief and has to go and mentally process the reveal.

Should he tell his mom that he’s met such an important historical figure? Wait no should he ask Yuu about it? Would it be rude? AH! SHE SAW HIS DELINQUENT SIDE WHILE ARGUING WITH ACE!

Poor boy is so confused on what to do especially since Yuu came from a magicless student that supposedly has a curse according to the mirror to royalty that raised or befriended all members of the Great Seven.

SAVANACLAW

Leona Kingscholar - Well this lion will continue to chug his respect women juice.

He already respects women back at his home and while for them its due to their strength, in Yuu’s case its cause of her age and wisdom that she shares from time to time. 

Ruggie Bucchi -   Ruggie would joke around Yuu and treat her like he does his grandmother. He'd probably poke on her getting old and how she probably shouldn't do so much strenuous activities both teasingly and seriously (much to Yuu's dismay. Her body doesn’t actually age.)

Doesn’t rob from or prank her mainly because he doesn’t feel like getting chewed out by the others who treat her like a goddess for befriending and even raising some of the Great Seven.

Jack Howl - Jack is cautious of his behavior around Yuu as he is a respectful young man.

Tends to worry a bit over her being very casual and relaxed in Twisted Wonderland especially since she’s such an important person in history and tends to be a bit overprotective of her.

Is still tsundere.

OCTAVINELLE

Azul Ashengrotto - He. Freaks. Out.

He did extensive research and studying as a child so he knows all about her and her history with the Great Seven.

He wonders how such a historic and ancient woman can casually walk around NRC with little recognition and hopes he can stay calm and suave if she were to ever approach him.

Jade Leech -  Jade is intrigued and amused with Azul’s reaction to her. As long as both Azul and Floyd were happy, he couldn’t care less. Though he does want to know if she can cook, he wants help in Mostro Lounge.

Is pleased to have someone to help wrangle Floyd in his more problematic moods. (”In the years I’ve lived in I’ve seen many moody people this isn’t much)

Floyd Leech - Floyd really couldn’t care less.

He sees the little shrimpy (she’s 170 cm tall) and wants to squeeze her, so what if she’s like 900? Floyd wants to play with the shrimpy!

SCARABIA

Kalim Al Asim -  Kalim is, well, excited. He’s awe struck at the fact she’s been alive for that long and would probably want to know more about her life. Kalim is a curious kid.

Despite his energetic nature, he likes hearing her share stories of the past.

When he wants to be more independent, he goes to her for help since she’s lived for so long.

Jamil Viper -  Jamil would be curt and formal, though he’s currently having a epileptic brain seizure. Jamil was well versed in history, and well...having someone his influential just struck something.

Is cautious of her during the Scarabia arc since she might be old and wise enough to see through his plan.

POMEFIORE

Vil Schoenheit - Vil was already interested in Yuu at the beginning due to being a woman and had a lot of potential but was unimpressed at her eyebags but likes her mature appearance despite being a first year- 

Wait the potato is HOW old?

Vil is impressed. Yuu is hundreds of years old yet looks to be in her early twenties at most.

When he learns that Yuu had even met the Evil Queen, he immediately went to ask about what the beautiful Evil Queen did to look as gorgeous as she did and Yuu happily indulges him.

Rook Hunt -  Rook is undeniably curious, especially after Yuu manages to evade him. He makes it a habit to monitor her movement, randomly ambush her, and try and chase her around the campus. His success varies on the amount of potato's that surround her. He stays away when she's near Diasmonia.

He enjoys chasing her whenever Yuu is around Ruggie or at rare times, Leona as he'd say, "It's hitting two birds with one stone"

Rook scopes out and probably doesn't intervene as much, opting to observe her movements.

Epel Felmier -  Epel is essentially confused, and is currently feeling pity for her as she’s being crowded by so many students. He grimaces when Rook takes interest in her. Epel sends Apple Juice for life fuel. He knows she’ll need it

IGNIHYDE

Idia Shroud -  Idia has heard of Yuu, especially with their rather complicated family history. He’s pretty formal towards Yuu.

Generally avoids her even with their family in better terms and Yuu even friends with Hades now. Is upset at her and Ortho’s alliance to get him out of his room.

Ortho Shroud - When Ortho hears her age and experience, Ortho is overjoyed.

He’s so happy to have Yuu join him in his mission to get his brother out of his room. Is oblivious to past family drama.

DIASOMNIA

Malleus Draconia - Yuu had raised him and his family up to his grandmother, the Witch of Thorns, of course he recognized her as soon as he saw her. He’s surprised to see her in NRC but its a welcome one. He uses a spell on Ramshackle to make it habitable for the woman that raised him alongside Lilia. 

Finds it amusing that the students had no clue. She’s in history books though Yuu does have a rather mediocre and youthful appearance so it must be why they mistook her as a student.

Yuu had asked him to keep quiet on it but unfortunately it seems that Sebek had exposed her while doing orders on his behalf. He apologizes over it and of course Yuu isn’t mad over it, more exasperated.  

Lilia Vanrouge - Lilia is amused that Yuu was mistaken by the teachers as a teenager that could be a student especially since Yuu is older than himself by a few hundred years. 

When the cat’s out of the bag, he’ll openly tease the students to be nicer to Yuu who could’ve been friends or related to their great great great great great etc or less grandparents and is their elder.

Is amused as the students attempt to get Yuu into more modern culture, having been accustomed to letters and more traditional ways for so long.

Silver - While Silver was primarily raised by Lilia, he’s surprised to see obaasa- Lady Yuu in NRC. 

He isn’t affected all too much since he isn’t addicted to guarding Malleus and Yuu like Sebek but he is quite happy to see her and can always tell when she visits since he tends to wake up with a pillow at the random place he slept in.

Sebek Zigvolt - He is ABSOLUTELY A P P A L L E D. Yuu to Sebek, is the most honourable woman to have ever walked the face of this planet. She has managed to raise most of the great seven and bring kingdoms to prosperity. She helped Malleus-sama train, she helped Lillia-sama rise through the ranks and even brought Maleficent to power in her early days.

The moment he gets to catch up to her in Ramshackle, Yuu has to calm him down because he goes feral when he sees where she has to live in but is appeased when Malleus uses magic to make it habitable and helps her personalize it.

Very clearly struggles to address her casually, shown with him being the one to expose her post overblot Riddle. 

Keep sending asks bois I love receiving them. Sorry this took a while there was a lot to go over.

[lesbian-deadpool]

New Surroundings

Part One Of Two: “Glad You’re Back.”

Natasha Romanoff x Reader

Words: 2,856

Warnings: Amnesia, metal limbs, death, bombs, seizures, a hard af ball being thrown at a face, I think that might be it.

Request: Yes. Thank you sm anon for donating to BLM!!

Summary: You forgot her. You just wondered when you’d remember.

Ko-Fi

(Not my GIF)

***

You don't remember.

Haunting isn't it?

How those three words can chill someone to their core. Coming up blank when they try to pinpoint a part of their lives.

It could positively turn someone's veins into ice. The blood flowing underneath cold, like a rushing current underneath a frozen river.

Your name.

Your serial number.

Your rank.

Those were the first things running through your mind, as you realised the darkness you were seeing all around you, was because of your own eyelids. Nothing was blinding you, nor keeping them shut. Nothing but the heaviness they held. For reasons, you did not know. But, whatever it was, you knew that it was not good.

You didn't know where you were.

Or what had happened to bring you to a place that felt strange and abnormal to your gut. It was just that sense you had. Forged from your years in the military.

When you thought hard about where you were, you came up with a blank. There was just nothing there. Nothing that told you where you were, how you cam to be here, not even if you were safe. Nothing.

The last thing that you could remember was laying on the warm, sandy ground. Conversing with your squadmates.

Things had been peaceful at that moment, out in the sun, having a few minutes of downtime.

But now?

Now your eyelids began to flutter.

You were coming through. Retreating from the dark clutches the back of your mind had upon you.

A high-pitched ringing swam through your brain, whilst you tried to focus your blurry vision, blinking heavily. When the ringing slowly started to dull, the realisation dawned on you that the ringing was not blaring around you, like some faulty radio that you could turn off. But was your own ears.

Yeah.

Your previous perceptions were correct.

Nothing about this was right.

That feeling swelled now. Vibrating in your bones.

A muffled yell rang through the room, and a cloudy figure ran towards you, fiddling with something in front of you. They kept yelling. The shouts grated against the slowly dispelling ringing in your ears.

Then.

Then you began to hear them clearer.

"Y/L/N!"

What?

"Y/L/N!"

Ugh.

"Y/L/N!"

Oh, yeah! That's your name!

Suddenly, as if you had had a bucket of ice water thrown on you, you snapped out of your hazed state.

Your vision was clear.

The ringing in your ears dulled into nothing within a few seconds.

And now you could fully see the man in front of you. The one looking shocked beyond belief. The one, you realised, who had freed you from your binds on the metal recliner-like chair.

The flesh on your left wrist bright red, raw, and light scars littered it. Ones old and new. Your other wrist hardly damaged, just a few small scratches adorned the metal there.

Wait...

METAL?!

Your arm hadn't been made of metal before. It was flesh, muscle, skin, and bone. Not this!

Many thoughts ran through your head at that moment, looking around the dark room you were in, with the close to erratic man, who wore a black kevlar suit.

What the fuck was going on?! Where were you? What happened? Who was the blonde guy in front of you-? And how did he know your name? And why in the fuck did you have a metal arm?!

To name a few...

"Y/L/N!"

"What?!" you yelled back.

"We gotta go!" the blonde man said, handing you a pistol.

Okay, yeah. That's fine, you knew how to use a gun.

As you pushed yourself out of the "chair" that you were previously strapped too, you followed the unknown man through the half-open door, and into the hallway. You finally resonated the thunderous, ongoing, heavy fire going on throughout the whole building.

"This way." He gestured forward with his head, his gun raised, with yours mirroring him, noticing you looking around the hallway curiously.

So, you followed him.

This strange man. That you just met. Not knowing if you could even trust him.

But he knew your name.

So, you trusted him more than most others right now.

Not having many other options, that weren't stupid as all hell. You followed him.

"We've been after this base for some time now."

"Right," you said, voice slightly conveying your confusion as to why he was telling you this.

"We just never expected to find you here- Or at all, really. God only knows what HYDRAs been doing to you, all of these years."

"Okay..." you replied slowly, before the rest of his sentence dawned on you, "Wait. HYDRA?"

"Yeah. Those slimy motherfuckers have been making their comeback," he noted, "But we're working hard to eradicate them before they get too up and running."

Hydra?

Like the snakey Greek water-monster?

That's a real thing?!

"Anyway," the blonde scoffed, with a smile upon his face, "Who do you think has been holding you here, all these years?"

"I... don't know."

Before your new-found ally could reply, a person dressed in all black, with a patch sewed onto their chest, that looked like a red skull and some type of octopus tentacles surrounding it. Who was- aiming a gun at you!

Yep! He's a bad guy!

You cleverly deducted.

Swiftly you raised your borrowed gun and fired a single shot. Hitting him right between the eyes.

"Huh," the blonded chuckled once at your marksmanship, "Ya still got it, Y/L/N."

"Thanks," you uttered, "When did I lose it?" you asked with a cocky smile upon your lips.

"Not as long as I've known you."

"What?" you whispered to yourself, continuing in that same hushed tone as you watched him run down the hall, and past the man you just shot down, "How do you know me?"

Then you were taking off after him before he could get too far away.

***

You said nothing the whole way to wherever the hell the blonde guy and his teammates were taking you. You just sat and processed everything.

Hundreds of questions running through your mind, as you stared off into space in front of you. 

By the way, he and his team were glancing your way every other second, you knew they wanted to talk to you. Ask you question after question, that ran through their own heads, that you knew you would not be able to answer. But they didn't bother you out of respect, and you obviously wanting to be alone right now. That, or they didn't know how to talk to you, at this moment.

Soon enough you were back at "home base" or "HQ", as they called it.

"Y/L/N," said the same blonde man that helped you escape, leading you out of the back hatch of the 'Quinjet', "Welcome back to SHIELD."

You walked off of the jet and onto an aircraft carrier.

The bright blue sky surrounding it. Not a grey cloud in sight.

"SHIELD." You nodded once, deciding to go along with everything you were told, by the man who obviously knew you. Until you could talk yo someone more senior, that is. "Right."

That's when you noticed it.

The sky.

There was only sky. 

No water in sight.

Then you saw the gigantic thrusters.

You were in. The sky.

Your eyed widened at the realization, the blonde beside you noticing this. He let out a hearty laugh and slapped your shoulder blade. His hand hitting a portion of metal, making it thud dully.

"Oh yeah, we got the hellicarriers back up and running, while you were away."

"Right. Okay." You nodded again, voice trying to stifle the shock you still felt running through you.

"This way, Y/L/N. You're wanted."

"Wanted?" you asked as he began to lead you towards a tall man wearing an eyepatch. "By who?"

"Fury, of course," he laughed heartedly," He'll want to debrief you on all of this."

"Aha."

You never took your eyes off of the man before you. You assumed he was 'Fury' or someone who would be taking you to them.

"Y/L/N," the new man said, nodding to you once in greeting.

"So, you're Fury? The boss of all this shit?" You waved your fingers around.

He looked at you somewhat confused. As the blonde uttered a confused, "What?" behind you.

"Yes."

"Good." You smiled, before your whole demeanour changed, entirely. "What the fuck is going on?!"

***

So, you lost your memory -that much you already knew- and apparently, you were some Agent at this SHIELD Organisation, and a member of some team called The Avengers.

Well, you were.

They thought you were dead- Well, who wouldn't after you had been missing, for the last six or so years?

If only you could remember anything of the last eleven years.

"So, now what?" you asked, sitting before Fury, in his office, "I don't remember you, anybody- I don't remember that blonde guy that saved me from those "HYDRA" dudes," you stressed 'HYDRA' questioningly, because you had only heard of them today, and had no clue who they were. All that you knew, from what Fury had told you, was that they were the bad guys.

You could have guessed that from the way one of them was trying to shoot you before, but okay.

However, you didn't know if you could even believe the man before you.

That is until he showed you proof. Documents, pictures, videos of you around the base, laughing with people you had never met before. Some even had you training recruits in them.

You had this whole life here.

And you couldn't remember any of it.

"That man was Tompson. He was a part of the team you directed before you joined The Avengers. He was one of your close friends."

"I've never met that man before in my life," you told him assuredly, pointing at his closed office door.

"You have."

"But I can't remember, Fury!" you yelled jumping up from your seat, "The last thing I remember, was being in Afganistan, talking to my friends."

At that, his face grew sad. He remembered how much you cared for your squadron, they were like your family.

You noticed this.

"What? What happened to my friends?"

"They died," he told you bluntly. Shocking you to your very core, more so than finding out aircraft carriers could fucking fly. Tears welled up in your eyes, "It was a bomb. You saw it all... they didn't survive it. All but one. But he... he lost most of his brain ability. You used to visit him... he had a seizure a few years ago. He died too, I'm so sorry."

"Who-" you choked out, "Who was it?"

"Petersburg."

Your face contorted into nothing but one of pain. Tears finally slipping down your cheeks, as you turned to face away from Fury.

That man was like your brother. The closest thing that you ever had to one. And to find out what happened to him, it felt like getting shot.

"I'm sorry, Y/N," Fury repeated.

Before you could get a chance to reply, the door burst open, interrupting you. And in ran a red-head.

"Romanoff!" Fury bellowed in the background.

You were surprised when the small woman threw herself at you, but your reflexes kicked in just in time, and you managed to catch her. Holding her against your body as she hugged you.

"Oh my, God," she breathed, trying to keep her emotions at bay. She pulled back, holding your face between her sort hands, you could see her eyes shifting from pure relief and happiness, to worry, "Y/N, are you okay? I've missed you so much, baby."

"What?" you whispered at her pet name towards you. Unable to tear your gaze from her shining green eyes.

"Romanoff." Fury tried to get her attention, at the same time. But failed. But, in her defence, you did blank him calling her name, too.

"-I was so worried about you." Tears grew in her eyes, as she uttered, "I thought you were dead." But she blinked her tears away, shaking her head at the mear thought, moving to wipe your tears away with her thumbs. "Are you tired-? Hurt-?"

"Romanoff."

"-God, I can't believe you're really here-" she smiled... then.

"Romanoff!"

Her attention finally snapped to the man, who she had ignored ever since barging into his office. "What?"

"Y/L/N here has lost their memory."

"What?" she repeated her previous question, shoulders drooping, and her fingers trailing to the sides of your jaw. "How much?"

"Eleven years."

"What?" She convulsed. Then turned back to face you, slowly lowering her hands from your face, them moving to hang by her sides, and you instantly missed her warmth. Yet, she finally noticed the wonder in your eyes, as you studied her face.

"Before you came in," Fury began, "I had just told them about Petersburg."

"Oh," she uttered breathlessly, seeing the sadness flashing in your eyes before you dropped your head slightly. The green-eyes stranger grabbed your biceps, immediately feeling the difference between them, but decided that could be dealt with at another time, "Honey, I'm so sorry."

"Hey, it's not your fault." You waved her off, trying to lighten the atmosphere in the room, somewhat. And she finally noticed the metal of your hand, her eyes widening just so before she blinked them back to normal.

"I went yo his funeral," she told you, "I said goodbye for you."

"I- Thank you."

"You don't have to thank me."

You let out a small chuckle at her graciousness.

You shook your head, gesturing to her, "Hey, who are you again?"

"I'm Natasha. Natasha Romanoff." She smiled. "We were... we were close."

"Close? How close?"

"Very close."

"Well... it's nice to meet you, Natasha Romanoff. You already know who I am," you joked, putting your hand out for her to shake.

She laughed, taking your metal hand and shaking it.

"That I do... I'm glad you're back."

"I'm glad to be back."

And you were.

It was better being here, in the bright open world, with people who seemed nice. Rather than back in that dank building where you had been held captive.

Yeah...

You were glad to be "back".

***

Three weeks later and you were flourishing.

All that you were missing were your memories.

You hadn't remembered a single thing in the short amount of time that you had been staying at the compound.

Your "old" new-found friend, Tony Stark, and his college and teammate, Bruce Banner, had told you not to worry about that. And that your memories will come back, you just had to give them some time.

You had asked how they knew. How they knew that you would remember everything, and wouldn't have to essentially restart your life.

That's when they told you about Bucky. A man currently on a mission with some guys named Sam, and Steve. A man who also had a metal arm, but no metal leg- Which you soon discovered you had, the same day you had returned, as you went to the bathroom.

You had quite the shock, seeing the metal of your left leg, starting at your mid-thigh.

However! That Bucky guy had been brainwashed, just like Tony and Bruce had verified, that you had too. And Bucky's brainwashing had gone on for much longer than yours have. More years than you had even been alive. He had managed to get all of his memories back within a few years. So, they were sure you would, too.

So, that filled you with hope.

But still. They ran tests.

Just to make sure.

But you knew they just wanted to document your brain activity for research, and you were happy to play along.

They even brought in a teenage girl named Shuri, to "decondition" you. Just in case you had any triggers that could be randomly set off and would make you into a killing machine. Along with many other possibilities.

You jumped at that. Not wanting to accidentally hurt the people you had found yourself growing close too, in such a small amount of time.

The people who saw you as family.

Now, here you were.

Outside on the compound's grounds, getting ready to kick a re-enforced ball, towards a kid named Peter Parker. And with your metal leg, no less.

The boy asking you to do so, because he was curious about how far you could kick it.

Let's just say.

You could kick the ball super fucking far, with your left leg.

Peter dove for it. Huffing as he caught it. Landing on his ass.

You laughed as Natasha came up beside you, with a smile on her own face.

"I like that kid," you told her, pointing to Peter, who was moving to a stand.

"Well, I would hope so. You practically adopted him."

"Wait. What?" you snapped your attention to the stunning woman next to you. Just as Peter managed to regain his footing, and a re-enforced ball was colliding with the side of your face. Sending you tumbling to the floor.

Them worryingly yelling after you.

Okay, yeah. That kinda hurt.

[katsidhe]

7.02 final thoughts? (Idk if this one has been requested yet)

7.02 Final Thoughts

*rubs hands* Ah, yes, the episode that got me into SPN. I could talk forever about season 7. 

Fun drinking game: take a shot every time someone makes a different colorful idiom about Sam being insane. Hint: you’ll die, because I counted 25.

(I WONDER WHY Sam didn’t want to tell Bobby or Dean about his active symptoms of psychosis. Truly, a mystery for the ages.)

Even setting Hallucifer aside, this episode highlights so many of the things I high-key LOVE about season 7: the erosion of Sam and Dean’s support network (as tenuous as that already was)—take away Bobby’s house, take away angelic healing, take away the Impala, make them vulnerable and alone and crumbling under the weight of the trauma they’ve accumulated. The broken leg, Sam’s head injury and seizure in the ambulance? Strapped down, badly injured, the fates of their friends uncertain, headed into the belly of the beast? ICONIC. Over the top. Amazing.

It’s a similar kinda thing to Jody’s predicament—sure, she’s capable enough ordinarily, but if you give her surgery and drug her and leave her alone in a hospital with a liver-eating monster on the prowl, the stakes look a lot different, don’t they? I’ve seen this episode approximately one gazillion times but every time I get tense for her.

Quick thoughts on the Leviathans, which have a reputation as an underwhelming SPN villain. Perhaps because of how unsubtle and half-baked they are as metaphor for corporate greed/capitalistic consumption, perhaps because of how their promise of truly terrifying Old Ones, Cthulu-esque devourers, never quite came true (except for a bit in 7.01 and 7.02, yikes!). But honestly I’ve always liked them—I like how their organization and assimilation of knowledge drives the Winchesters deeper underground than even the Apocalypse did; I like how they made the Winchesters’ entire world into something mundanely unsafe and miserable; I like how they showcase the horror of a enemy composed of lockstep drones, the way that Heaven (and Hell, sometimes) tries to be, but never truly manages; I like Dick Roman’s gleeful ravenousness; I like their spooky mouths; hell, I even like the Dick jokes. 

Bobby’s solicitousness towards Dean, and how awkwardly he talks to Sam a little later in the episode, is very emblematic of how bone-deep uncomfortable he is around an honest-to-God mental illness, and, well, around Sam’s issues in general. Which doesn’t make him a bad person, or unsupportive, necessarily. But it’s very evident that he’s got no clue what to say to Sam or how to handle him, that he’s leagues more comfortable dealing with Dean’s problems (as has often been the case regardless of Sam’s mental health).

A related, but separate point: the lengths the show goes to to emphasize “look, Dean’s not okay,” while Sam’s in the middle of a psychotic break… It baffles me a little every time I see this episode, when Bobby walks away from Sam all “yyyyeah I gotta go do some work” and then is immediately all “ok but Dean, how are YOU feeling?” It’d be one thing if Dean weren’t emotionally demonstrative, and if Sam were—if Sam, at this point in the episode, was so obviously struggling to such a painful degree that Bobby wants to make sure Dean’s not overlooking his own reactions. But that’s not really the case. Apart from some flinching, Sam’s been very matter-of-fact about the whole thing so far.

This is our first deep-dive into Sam post-Cage, a full season about he returned. And I love it to pieces, you guys. I love how these inescapable, soul-deep consequences are the inevitable answer to the moral of Sam’s story, where he interred himself with his worst nightmare, forever.

Dean after Hell is clawing for moral high ground. Dean focuses on this bleak kind of virtue, this idea of martyrdom and righteous struggle that eventually unspools and reveals itself to be fundamentally unmoored. He needs some kind of redemption for himself after what he was forced to do in Hell; he needs to own his destiny, and he needs that destiny to be meaningful and good, and he channels his violence outward in that cause.  

Sam does not take any kind of high ground. He hurts... himself. He gnaws inward. No illusions about how “messed up” he is—he sidelines himself before Dean or Bobby can say a single word; he figures he needs to be on top of it, needs to get out ahead of the danger he could represent and reassure his family that he knows he’s a hazard. Sam has learned to repress and downplay and hide his traumas and his freakishness both to avoid feeling stigmatized and to avoid being a burden on the people he loves, especially on his brother. So when Dean reacts with fear (understandable) and anger (less so), Sam takes it in stride.

Hallucifer is probably my favorite thing this show has ever done. I could probably write another thousand words on Hallucifer alone—on how Sam’s using this face for coping, for compartmentalizing; both to hurt himself and to keep himself company, to sort through his pain and arrive at a place where it’s at all tenable for him to exist. 

Sam’s skepticism about professional mental health treatment—his idea that this is a problem he can handle himself, that a doctor would "just stuff [him] full of pills”—is clearly one born of the family mold. This is his dismissive response to Hallucifer!Dean’s accusation that Sam won’t be able to cut it on his own. This denial, this idea that Sam knows he needs to get a handle on this, and therefore that he MUST do it himself, make a science of it, is fascinating. 

On the subject of denial: Hallucifer poses a simple question to Sam: are you sure you got out? And Sam’s NOT sure. Faith that he’s free is yet another maybe-lie that Sam must tell himself with maniacal intensity this season, for the sake of his own sanity, to avoid the voice in his head telling him to shoot himself. 

That Scene in the warehouse. Dean’s advice to Sam is to trust in Dean as the cornerstone of his reality. Asks him to build his whole world on his trust in Dean. What choice does Sam have? Who else can Sam rely on? What else can he do? There is no one else, nothing else. There’s only Dean, or Lucifer. It’s a dichotomy. It’s so CHILLING.

Especially in the context of what we know comes next—7.03, where Dean lies to Sam’s face, murders Amy, and uses Sam’s ~insanity~ to defuse Sam’s (justified) anger. And then, season 8, and 9, and 10, and, y’know what, the entire show. 

Sam drives his thumb into his bleeding hand, and it’s SPN in a nutshell—forever choosing the claustrophobia of the path of slightly less resistance, forever clinging to the misery of a life that’s only just this side of bearable, burying yourself in the toxic fallout because the alternative is unimaginably nightmarish—using the trappings of free will, of defiance, to choose to claw holes in yourself so that someone else won’t. There is no escape.

Dean’s threat of murder-suicide on the phone is so clearly meant to be sympathetic. And yes, on a certain level it absolutely is; and then on another level, it’s, y’know, MURDER-suicide, where Dean’s taking explicit responsibility for and ownership of Sam’s life, even though Sam’s pretty clearly lucid. Dean’s assuming as a matter of course his ability and right to make that decision for Sam. How Dean views and deals with Sam’s instability in season 7 lays major groundwork for Dean’s willingness to let in Gadreel in 9.01.

[blueeyedgeorgie]

Night Terrors-A.E

“could you do a imagine where the reader is a war vet and gets night terrors? she's dating Alex btw”

Gif Cred. @sdmngifs​

Pairing: ImAllexx x Reader

Word Count: 1.3k+

Pronouns: She/Her

____________

Alex had left his curtains open, allowing the lights of the city to flood into the bedroom. It was late at night, by now both Y/n and Alex had fallen asleep. Holding Y/n close, Alex had wrapped an around her waist, pulling her close. It had been a long day, Alex had been working on getting a couple of YouTube videos filmed and edited. He had planned to go on a trip with Y/n for a week back to his hometown, so he wanted to have content ready for fans to watch. Y/n had finished a long day of work before being invited to spend her Friday night at Alex's flat. He had been sleeping peacefully, holding his girlfriend close as he found his head buried into the crook of her neck. But the peace had disappeared once Alex had felt himself getting kicked. Pushing himself out of bed, he found himself stumbling on his feet at first. "Y/n what the fuck?" But after taking a moment, he had finally realized what was going on. Y/n had started to thrash around, a look of panic was stuck on their face as their eyes stayed closed. What was going on?   It seemed like Y/n was still asleep. But how could she be tossing herself around like this? Her face had become flushed, sweat began to bead down her forehead. It was obvious her pulse was rushing just from how they were tossing around. Could she be having a seizure of some sort? Hesitantly, Alex approached Y/n, getting as close as possible without touching her. What could be causing this? He felt bad, he had no clue what was happening to her. Part of him just wanted to grab his phone and call 999. But he needed to try and do everything he could before calling. "Y/n..." leaning in, he placed his hands on Y/n's shoulder, going to gently shake her awake. Right away, that was a bad idea. Just from touching Y/n, she had started to scream, her thrashing around had increased.  Quickly, Alex pulled away from her. He didn't want to irritate her anymore than she already was. Only what felt like seconds later, Alex's door had been slammed open. George stood there in a pair of shorts, his hair was a mess. He obviously wasn't prepared to hear Y/n screaming at the top of her lungs. "What the fuck is going on?" he spoke wide-eyed, looking back and forth from the girl on Alex's bed to his flatmate. "She just started kicking me awake then I went to touch her to wake her up and she started screaming," Alex looked back over to George for a moment, only to look back to Y/n. He was scared she might throw herself out of bed. George stared at Y/n, he seemed to be trying to think. Alex found himself inching closer and closer to Y/n, he just wanted to try and figure out what was wrong with Y/n. "It's got to be night terrors. It has to be," George groaned tiredly. He leaned his head down, rubbing his temples. Lately he hadn't gotten much sleep. Just from hearing Y/n scream, he could already feel a migraine form. "There's not much we can do until she wakes up, Alex." "I... alright," Alex let out a soft sigh. "Sorry Y/n woke you up." "Whatever, just tell me when she's planning to sleep over again so I can plan to stay the night with my girlfriend," George let out another groan, already making his way out of the door. "Yeah, sure thing," the brunette mumbled, taking a seat on the bed next to Y/n. Alex felt terrible he didn't have any way to help Y/n, all he could do was sit there and wait for it to be over. Alex found himself counting the minutes away. He couldn't really distract himself from Y/n, afterall he could only hear her thrashing around and her screams every now and then. Every now and then, he found himself mumbling "It's going to be alright, Y/n," and "I'm here, I'll always be here." After 20 minutes had passed, a blood-curdling scream came from y/n as she sat up. Alex was a bit surprised when Y/n sat up, he had jumped at the sudden movement. Once Y/n sat up, she began to look around frantically, her eyes wide as she looked. "Y/n, it's alright-" Alex had gone to place a hand on Y/n's shoulder to comfort her, only to have Y/n pull herself away from him at the feeling of his touch. Getting a second look at Y/n, Alex had realized that Y/n's pupils were dilated, she had been breathing heavily. She continued to look around for a bit, Alex waited for her to catch her breath and finally say something. "...Alex?" As soon as she had realized where she was, Y/n had started to sob, falling into Alex's arms. "I'm here, it's alright. I got you now," Alex cooed, beginning to rub Y/n's back as soon as she fell into his arms. She hadn't stopped crying, she just continued as time rolled on. And before Alex knew it, Y/n had fallen asleep against him. This time there wasn't any screaming, there was no kicking around. This time she had fallen asleep like a baby in his arms.

The couple had decided to sleep in. When 11 AM had finally rolled around, Y/n had dragged Alex out of bed into the kitchen for food and coffee. George was still hidden away in his bedroom, probably trying to sleep in for a bit longer. Alex couldn't blame him after what happened last night. Alex was a bit confused, Y/n seemed so cheerful and happy. It was almost as though she had completely forgotten about what had happened last night. He still hadn't asked her about what exactly was going on with her. He knew he'd have to ask her soon, so why not now? "Last night... you were moving around... George was said you were having night terrors, is that true?" Y/n froze. She had been getting a cup of coffee, but just from hearing Alex mentioning night terrors, she could feel her anxiety start to build up. "It happened again?" "Again?" Alex raised a brow, he had no clue Y/n had gotten night terrors. They had been dating for almost three months now. He was just a bit surprised she hadn't mentioned that she had them before. "I've just been having night terrors about war... just one of the things that come with being a vet, I guess," Y/n let out a sigh, keeping her eyes looking down. She was quite embarrassed. She just thought they had gone away, it had been a couple of months since her last episode. "I'm never able to remember having them, my flatmate has told me that I'd have them every now and then... it's been months since my last episode. I thought I'd be alright." There were a few seconds of silence as Alex took everything in. "Do you ever remember your night terrors?" "I've never been able to, not once," she shook her head with a sigh escaping her lips. Alex felt bad for Y/n, she obviously hated having this happen to her. "Hey, look at me," making his way over to his girlfriend, he placed his hands on her cheeks, directing her gaze up at him. "I wanna help you and try and figure out some way to get your night terrors to end. But I'll only help as long as you want me to." "Please?" Y/n smiled. For a moment they just stared at each other, only to find both of them leaning in for a kiss. How was she lucky enough to meet this boy? "Good morning to you two," George mumbled, entering the kitchen. "Sorry to interrupt your moment but I'll be taking Y/n's coffee, she can make a new one." "Fuck off, George!" She looked away from her boyfriend, "It's mine!" "Not while you're making out with Alex!" "I was here first!" Alex chuckled, moving out of Y/n's way as she tried to keep her cup protected from his flatmate. He could care less about her trauma, Alex still adored Y/n.

Taglist: @anyasthoughts​ @multifandom-but​ @blondiee-seaveyy​ @springholland​ @caswinchester2000​

[piedelune]

Whistleblower, chapter 4

Whistleblower, Ch 4: Immolate

Here’s chapter 4 of @fuure ‘s and my long term Erasermic drama fic!

Authors: Fuure, PieDeLune

Fandom: My Hero Academia/Boku no Hero Academia

Relationships: erasermic | Shouta Aizawa/Hizashi Yamada, erasermight | Shouta Aizawa/Toshinori Yagi, tododeku | Shouto Todoroki/Izuku Midoriya, kiribaku | Eijirou Kirishima/Katsuki Bakugou, ochatsuyu | Ochaco Uraraka/Tsuyu Asui, dabihawks | Dabi/Keigo Takami

Rating: Mature

Chapter Summary: UA has been rocked by devastating news. Tenya has a heart-to-heart with his brother Tensei, and Shouta confronts Hizashi about his role in it all. CW: Alcohol use, implied drug use, violence

Excerpt: 

In the UA dorms, Tenya Iida sat at the edge of his bed, hanging his throbbing head low. He flinched whenever his phone vibrated with another text notification on the duvet beside him, but could not bring himself to answer or even open the messaging app to read them. In the background, his small television set read out that early morning's breaking news, but he was no longer absorbing any of it. The damage had been done.

This... was possibly the worst thing that could have happened.

At the next insistent buzz from his phone, he glanced down at it, scanning the text preview that had appeared on the lock screen.

[Sender: Niisan 6:43 am Mum and dad are really worried about you. I'm worried. Please, can we talk?]

The footsteps from outside Tenya's room told him that there were now more students awake; Denki Kaminari had knocked on his door some twenty minutes ago, but Tenya had been ignoring his attempts to communicate.

"Oh, hey," he heard the blond say from outside, muffled through the door.

"Hey," returned Kyouka Jirou's voice. "You hear the news?"

Denki flopped back against the wall with a gentle thump. "Yeah," he sighed, "hard not to. It's all over Twitter."

Someone with them sniffled — probably Tooru Hagakure, Kyouka's neighbor on the girls' side of the floor.

"Yeah, that's where I heard too," Kyouka muttered gravely. "Have you… read any of it, or...?"

"Ah... yeah, kinda," Denki admitted in a tone that indicated he regretted doing so. "I got curious and looked up a few of our classmates. When I read Iida-kun's, I wanted to try and check on him, but I think he's still asleep."

Tenya hunched his shoulders. What an invasion...!

There was a brief pause, and then Kyouka ventured, “We’ll see him when he gets up. What about you, dude? I — sorry, I… looked you up, I had no clue your quirk was giving you seizures. That sucks...”

“Oh,” Denki replied with mild surprise, but then he laughed. “Well, what’re you gonna do, huh?” he asked blithely. “Anyway, is everyone else doing okay? Tooru-chan — ?”

Before Tooru could answer, another voice joined the fray outside his door — this time it was the vice class captain, Momo Yaoyorozu.

"Kaminari-kun, why are you not in uniform?" came her lofty voice, though laced with considerable notes of stress. She barely waited for the airhead to sheepishly mumble his excuse ("Well, class is prolly cancelled, Yaomomo...") before she knocked briskly on Tenya's door.

"Iida-kun...!" she called, voice sharp and grating on Tenya’s throbbing ears.

"M...maybe we should let him be," Tooru opined. "I can understand why he might not want to be seen..."

"No matter what was said about him, he has a duty to uphold," Momo replied authoritatively as she waited for Tenya to answer. "This is bigger than just ourselves. It's during times like these that we must step up and be leaders. Iida-kun! Please wake up, we have a job to do!"

The rapping on his door tore into his aching skull like broken glass, and Tenya just covered his ears. Of course Yaoyorozu was right, but...! How could he face the others and lift them up when he couldn't even lift himself? Especially now when they now knew about his great shame...?

(READ IT HERE!)

[wu-sisyphus-gang]

Motion Sickness Chapter 73

pq pq pq pq pq pq pq pq pq pq pq pq pq pq pq pq pq pq

(Ruby PoV)

"You spent the night in his room," Blake accused Weiss as she rejoined us.

"He had nightmares that kept him up. Dreams from Salem," Weiss responded. "Nothing happened."

"I gave it away to Adam too soon. I regret it."

"Nothing happened," Weiss repeated.

"And our Cloud isn't like your Adam," I said. "I don't regret having sex with him the times that I did. It was wonderful. If something happened between Weiss and him, it's not like what happened between you and Adam."

"And I'm telling you nothing happened anyways. I set boundaries and he respected them," Weiss said.

"He never did that at Beacon," Yang tossed in. "He was always all over you."

"He was a newborn at Beacon. And it was never as bad as I made it seem," Weiss defended. "He was always polite and… he was afraid. It was a first crush and it was never like what Blake must have gone through. Jaune, when he was Jaune, pressured me into going to the movies, not even close to sex. It's just not the same. I think he would have been scared of something like that."

"So what did you get up to, then?" Yang asked. She sounded bored.

"He told me a bit about what his new meds were like. How they all had side effects and he was on some just to treat the side effects of others. He said he felt doped up all the time," Weiss answered. "He said he felt half asleep."

"That's no good if he gets in a fight," Yang muttered.

"Cloud is skilled. He should be fine," I defended.

"I don't know. I'm worried about him, Ruby," Weiss said. "His nightmares are bad. And Salem is always trying to press on his mind."

"So what should we do? It's not like we can kill Salem. She's invincible, or close to it," I murmured.

"Does Cloud know that?" Blake asked. "I wouldn't tell him. He might decide to kill himself if he thought it was hopeless. He told me he tried it after he killed Ren and Nora."

"He tried to kill himself?" Weiss asked, astonished.

"You didn't know?" Blake returned. "He mentioned it to me when we talked about Adam."

"No, I didn't know." Weiss shot a look back through the door she came through, she looked like she might go back to him.

"Maybe we should talk to him," I managed.

"You haven't been able to help him yet," Blake muttered.

"Blake! Who's side are you on?" Weiss asked.

"His, evidently. I think he agrees with me about him," Blake returned. "I think he knows his situation is hopeless."

"He's not hopeless. He's resisting her," I said.

"How long can he keep that up?" Blake wondered. Her palms outstretched. "Even he doesn't think he can last forever against her, does he?" She shot the last bit to Weiss.

"He thinks it's permanent brain damage. He thinks he's having seizures or strokes," Weiss said. "He thinks she'll get to him. Especially while he's sleeping."

I chewed on my lip. "So what do we do? Send him back to the hospital?" I wondered.

Weiss winced. "Cloud won't like that. They took his weapon away last time. He doesn't want to go back and 'get locked up.'"

"Should he even have his weapon?" Yang asked. We all looked at her. "Well should he? He's a little fucked up."

"When he killed for the first time, I was so worried about him. It doesn't seem like he's slowed down since then. It's all been a blur," I said. "I was so worried. I thought I messed everything up. But what if this has just been in him. Festering beneath the surface. He's been sick."

"He is. I hoped that we would be able to take care of him. Are we going to give that up?" Weiss asked.

"I don't know. What do we do, Weiss?"

"Me? I have no idea."

"You've always been the smart one."

"So I should know what to do about this?" She shook her head. "I have no clue. He's in a lot of pain. All the time."

"Well, where is he now?" I asked.

She pointed back at the door she came through. "He's getting ready for another day. I don't know if he has an assignment or if he's just slated for training."

"We should be too," Blake said. she got up and began pulling her nightwear off. "I'm sure he has his head in the game."

"Blake is probably right." Weiss slunk inside and began to strip out of her clothes too. "Maybe we'll get lucky and only have training today. She stripped down to her brassiere before I looked away.

Bad bi thoughts. Now is not the time.

I dressed supernaturally fast and was waiting for Cloud outside of his room for when he was ready in just a few minutes.

He strode from his room looking tall, dark, and handsome. His massive blade was in its harness behind his back.

"Ja-Cloud, Weiss told me a bit about what you're going through with your meds. I just wanted you to know I'm here for you. If you needed anything."

He looked surprised. His eyes flickered over my head towards my room for a moment. Then they came back to me. "I know Ruby. It's just Salem. She's always on me."

"Cloud… I talked to Ozpin… I wanted to let you know that Salem is invincible."

"Immortal," he corrected. "Not invincible."

"You knew?" I asked.

"It's what I asked the relic of knowledge. How to defeat her, I mean. I have a plan. I'm going to cut her into pieces and never ever give her the chance to heal."

"You think that will work?" I wondered. My gaze brushed over his bronze and white sword.

"It's worth a shot. If not I'm doomed."

"You're not doomed. And you're not… you're not thinking about killing yourself, are you?"

He sighed. He met my eye. "Don't freak out on me Ruby."

"I won't." I vowed.

"I'm always thinking about killing myself. It seems like the fastest way to get away from her."

My mouth dropped open. "Cloud…"

"Other times it seems like exactly what she wants. I have no idea what to do."

"You're not going to hurt yourself, are you?" I pleaded and begged.

"Probably not today."

"Cloud…" I murmured.

"It has nothing to do with you, or how great you are to me." He pulled his hand down and cupped my cheek. "It all has to do with her. With my mother. Her control over my mind isn't simple. She is constantly attacking my subconscious. That's what makes it hard to resist. If I'm paying attention it's easy enough for the most part, but I have to constantly be afraid of what's slipping through the cracks. Like calling her my mother, for one. That's constantly coming through, no matter how hard I try. I have to be afraid of what else is happening like that."

"She is your mother," I whispered.

"That's not why I call her that, though." He sighed and shifted. He grabbed the hilt of his weapon for a long moment. Like he might draw it. But against what? It was just him, I, and his loud thoughts in a long corridor.

He released the long red handle and sighed. He rubbed his face hard.

"Weiss mentioned you were having strokes and seizures."

"I asked her not to share that with you…"

"What? Why?" I had to wonder. My heart broke a little.

"I didn't want to worry you. This is normal for me now. I was worried it would break your little Ruby heart."

"Too late…" I grumbled. "You should know you can share anything with me."

"You're right. Of course you're right. And you'd be right to be worried about me. Something is happening to me that I can't understand."

Weiss, Blake, and Yang walked out of our room but only Weiss walked over to us.

"You told her about the seizures," Cloud commented.

"Of course," Weiss said. She crossed her arms. "It was never up for a discussion."

"Fair enough," Cloud whistled. "Fair cop."

"Blake mentioned you tried to kill yourself," Weiss went on. "But you didn't feel like sharing that with us."

Cloud scratched the back of his head. "It slipped my mind amongst everything else."

"Uh huh," Weiss muttered tursley. Her expression made it clear that wasn't going to fly. "Are you forgetting anything else?"

I crossed my arms beside her but I don't think I managed to direct the same amount of disappointment at him as she did.

"I promise to tell at least one of you if I remember," Cloud vowed.

"At least one of us?" Weiss asked. She leveled her glare at him and flared her nostrils in his direction.

"Both of you, then." Cloud agreed. "And the moment I remember."

"That's how things need to be for this to work," Weiss said.

"You got it." I thought Cloud might salute at her but that would be just a bit much.

"Look I don't want to be the bad guy here," Weiss murmured. "But this needs to be ironed out."

"You're not. It's on me. Pinkie swear," Cloud seemed all onboard.

Weiss sighed. "We're worried about you. We don't know how to help you."

"I think that no one can. And I resent putting you in that position."

"We want to be in that position," I said softly. "We want to try our hardest to help you."

Cloud looked stunned. His jaw worked for a moment while he tried to figure out something to say. "You're right. I'm sorry. You of all people I shouldn't be cutting out like that. I just don't know what to do. And I'm scared. I'm scared that there's nothing you can do."

"Let us try," I whispered.

He reeled back like I struck him across the face. He flinched back and had trouble meeting my eye.

He gave a slow firm nod of assent. It couldn't be mistaken for anything else. He was giving his word that he would do what he could to help us help him.

"Now," I said with all that cleared up. "Do you need to go back to the hospital?"

"I don't know. They weren't the most helpful. They took my weapon away. They take everything away. There's nothing to do but wait for my next meal. It makes me feel like a dog."

"You're not a dog," Weiss murmured.

"I am to Salem," he countered. "She's so old and strong. I'm like a dog to her if she's like a person to me."

"Is anything getting better on your medication?" I asked.

"Maybe the hallucinations but it's hard to tell." He rubbed his face with his hand. "There's not exactly a good reference frame for it. How loud they are. How intense they are."

"How many medications are you on at this point? You said they kept prescribing things."

"Four. Two tranquilizers, an antipsychotic, and some other one that's supposed to help with racing thoughts and tremors caused by the others."

"Is that a lot?" I asked Weiss with a look.

"I don't know," Weiss muttered. "I'm not a psychiatrist."

"They want to get me down to just two medications. They're still experimenting with what works and what doesn't. Some of the medications can make things worse more than they make things better. It's not exact and I just have to trust that they know what they're doing."

"Maybe we need to get a second opinion," Weiss crossed her arms. "Maybe we need to talk to a private provider."

"That means telling them my story again, and it'll take time."

"And it will cost money," I said.

"Money isn't a problem. I have some bank accounts from when I stole from people on the wrong side of the law with millions of Lien, still," Cloud said.

"Who'd you steal that from?" Weiss asked.

"Don Corneo. Then I killed him. Neo and I did. I still have those private bank accounts, they didn't take them from me when I was arrested. Didn't know that they existed."

"Hang in there, Cloud. We'll find something that works for you," Weiss murmured. "It can and will get better."

"I just… I just don't think we will. Don't think it will. Mother's hooks are in me deep. And if this is all I have to look forward to, maybe I should kill myself."

"Don't think that way," I pleaded.

"I am thinking that way. All the time. I can't help it," he muttered. "I obsess about it. Part of why I think maybe she wants me to do it. She told me to run away, in a whisper, once. This is the ultimate form of that. I'm terrified that if I try and kill myself I won't die and I'll become even more of a burden on you both."

"Holy shit," I breathed, eyes wide.

"Let's get that second opinion. It's a good place to start," Weiss said. "Then we'll see. Just… just don't do anything rash."

He gave us a shaky but agreeable nod.

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"How's your boyfriend and girlfriend?" Penny asked as the truck hummed along.

"We had a date that went well the other day. All three of us. But… but Weiss and I are worried about him. I worry about him all the time. He has all these dark thoughts. Remnants of what Salem did to his mind," I answered. "I don't know how to help him. He's struggling and I'm not sure how to reach him."

"Well what did Salem do to him?"

"She took over his mind. He says she spoke and he had to obey."

"Like he was programmed to?" She asked. I looked at Penny. She was a machine for all that she was a real person too, maybe she had some insights I was lacking because of how she was made. "I'm slated for a sparring match with him later this week. His powers make it so that he might be able to keep up with me and present me a real one on one challenge. My abilities often make it difficult for an individual to contest me alone. Ironwood said to treat it like I was fighting Cinder Fall because of how he might have magic. It might be my best chance to practice against such a foe until Winter becomes the new winter maiden."

"That's…" I paused. I hadn't had the chance to go up against him myself any time recently. Not since before Weiss and Yang showed up in Mistral. "I should spar with him too. We always used to back in Anima. I miss it." I shook those thoughts off. "And he says his subconscious is always under her attack. He's afraid of what might be coming through when he's not paying attention. And even when he is sometimes things slip past him."

"He's on a medication regiment, yes?"

I nodded. "But he's not sure how well it's working."

"If I found out I was programmed to do something I hated I'm not sure how I would respond," Penny said. She shook her head slightly. "It would make me sad to say nothing else. And he killed his friends. I can only imagine how hard that would be."

I nodded. "But Salem hasn't had any control over him since then."

"That he himself knows of. If I was programmed against my will I don't know that I would notice it. Would I? Could I? Perhaps that's what he's afraid of. He might be afraid of doing her will unknowingly."

"He said that about killing himself. That he wasn't sure if he would just be playing into her hands if he did take his life. It's… it's too scary to think about. What if I lost him again? It would be my own fault."

"No one would hold you responsible. Salem is a monster. And she's doing something horrible to him. She's hacking his brain."

"Is there any way I can keep him safe? He doesn't sleep well. He says he's vulnerable to her while he does."

"He's probably right. And sleep is a time for the brain to repair itself. Has he suffered any other brain trauma related phenomena?"

"He thinks he's having miniature strokes and seizures because of it."

"Ruby… this sounds bad," Penny confessed to me. "It sounds like she's winning. Slowly but surely. She's breaking him down into what she wants him to be. If he was a machine like me it would be fast but this wetware attack is slow going."

"What do I do, Penny? How do I save him from this?"

"I'm not sure that you can, it sounds like he must fight as well as he is able against her attacks. For as long as he is able."

The truck rolled along for a quiet moment.

"He has sisters, right? They might be able to shed some light on this. The successful models may know more," Penny murmured.

"They work for Salem. She has them too."

"Ruby…"

I felt like crying. I felt so utterly helpless. How could I possibly save him from this… this nightmare he lived in.

"I'm going to be there for him. Whatever he needs. I won't let him lose himself. Not over to Salem."

"Ruby I think… I think you should start to let go. Remember him how he was, before it's too late. Before she takes him."

"I'm not going to give up on him. I refuse to abandon him." I was adamant.

"I think you're going to hurt yourself. I hate to see you this way."

"Weiss and I will come up with a plan to keep him safe."

"It doesn't sound like you can. He's being hacked remotely. Not unless you kill Salem. Stop things at the source."

"We can't kill her. She's immortal. Like Ozpin." It was so unfair. It felt like checkmate five turns ago. "I won't let him walk through hell. I would lose myself for him."

"Ruby…"

"I mean it. If I have to fight Salem herself I will. Cloud says he knows where she is all the time. Like some kind of radar. We can find her and beat her. She's only immortal. Not invincible. That's what Cloud said. I'm going to help him cut her into tiny pieces so she can never harm a hair on his head again."

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-WG