#not allowed to eat or sleep or anything just suffer and do homework and be sad

[elprupneerg]

three hours of sleep gang woooooooooooooooooo

[360iris]

do you have any wips? sorry i’m just curious, i’m in love with your writing

Luv, Hold Me Down (Sirius Black x Reader, WIP)

Warning: Mature themes? I don’t know with this one.

Word count: 2,209

A/N: You’re gonna hate my ass because I have zero intention to finish the smut on this one shdhd. Maybe when I’m less busy I’ll come back and update it (although not atm). There are typos galore too so I’m sorry in advance!

—————————————-

The infamous Bubblegum Bomb Incident of 1972. Casualties: one.

During Year Two, Sirius had resolved to get revenge on Cissy’s insufferable boyfriend ever since he tripped him in the halls to get a laugh out of his Slytherin lackeys; and what better way to do that than ruining his precious platinum locks.

It was suppose to be a quick and untraceable procedure. He’d get to personally serve Lucius his own brand of justice and the job would be completed without having to suffer detention.

If only you hadn’t been rushing through the halls that day.

Lunch had just ended, and you were haphazardly ducking and dodging through the wave of students, on your way to visit Remus. He’d been sentenced to a strict, three day period of consistent bed-rest in the infirmary after a particularly bad transformation.

You’d just wanted to bring him a slice of his favorite Hogwarts style coconut cream pie, but one wrong turn and you were suddenly bombarded with three quick pelts of homemade exploding bubblegum bullets.

Sirius had designed them to be quick and lethal with their distribution of rubbery goo so that the target's hair was sure to be ruined.

The first shot sent the small plate in your hands completely airborne. The next two hit you square in the chest, knocking you fully onto your back.

The aftermath was so extreme that it took the combined effort of Professor McGonagall, Professor Flitwick, and eventually, the guiding hand of Madam Pomfrey to free you from the sticky sludge and off of the stone pavement.

By the time they’d got to the infirmary, your entire head of hair had been deemed unsalvageable by sweet Poppy, and the only thing she could figure to do was shave it clean off by hand.

You’d spent the next two days unexpectedly alongside a tired Remus, confined in the sick bay, crying your eyes out hysterically. You’d had no idea who had done this to you or why.

That was until the third day, when Poppy finally allowed visitors in, in hopes of lifting your spirits.

Your guests included:

An empathetic Lily and Mary, both girls bringing you and Remus an abundance of flowers from the greenhouses, with explicit approval from Professor Sprout; alongside the homework you’d missed and plenty of junk foods.

An overzealous Marlene who’d spent the entirety of the three days drafting up and collecting signatures for a petition to permanently ban disruptive joke shop type inventions.

And lastly, an uncharacteristically stonefaced James and solemn Sirius who both quietly observed the crucially placed scarf on your head meant to distract from your current state of baldness.

“Go on then. Tell her, man. It’s only proper.” James said abruptly with folded arms, for the first time ever foregoing his usual impeccable home-taught manners and any form of courteous greetings altogether.

You watched confused as Sirius stood some several feet away, staring directly down at his shoes. After another coarse verbal prod from James, he stepped forward, eyes wide and brows furrowed.

“I- You have to understand, I couldn’t have known, Y/N! It happened so suddenly and before I knew it, it was too late!” He pleaded desperately and you weren’t quite understanding what he meant.

“I don’t follow, Sirius. What are you on about?” You asked, watching as he began wringing his hands.

He looked over to James again, seemingly pleading for aid that wouldn’t come. James looked positively severe, intent on standing by his decision to have the boy do this by himself.

“I- I was the one who blew the gum bullets.” Sirius finally whispered, looking positively terrified of your reaction. “But I didn’t intend on hitting you, I promise! It was for that git Malfoy! Remember when he tripped me in front of all of those sixth years last month? I’d been working on a way to get him back ever since! You’ve got to believe me, Y/N!”

But you’d stopped listening after the initial reveal. Your blood ran cold and it was hard to focus on anything in particular before suddenly all of your senses came rushing back in, and you were furious.

And even though James and Remus had been gauging your response, neither could have been quick enough to match the speed at which you pulled off both of your slippers and hurled them at the older boy’s face.

Successfully managing to clock him so hard, he reflexively reached up to clutch his sore, but still intact nose.

After that day, you had deemed Sirius public enemy number one, he managed to outrank even the silver-spoon fed Slytherins and that antagonizing blight, Peeves.

While there were tonics for quickening hair growth, you cursed Sirius Orion Black, every time you had to awkwardly apply a plethora of random oils to your scalp and walk around campus bald for an entire semester.

When he looked your way, you glared back mercilessly. If he dared to even address you, your responses were far from being deemed PG-13.

He’d spent the first six months wearily but consistently trying to apologize, however the damage had already been done, and it’d destroyed any semblance of friendship he’d crafted with you beforehand.

So after a while, he gave up. If you were going to hate him regardless of his actions, he figured he might as well stand up for himself during the bickering matches that transpired whenever the two of you were less than six feet apart.

Over the years, you’d remained bestfriends with Remus and James, though they could never hang out with the both of you at the same time.

For example, if you were eating breakfast with the two boys in The Great Hall and Sirius arrived late after sleeping in, you’d promptly roll your eyes and slide away to talk with Lily.

——

“That most definitely is not healthy, James.” You grimaced, tilting your head back laughing. The book in your lap, long since abandoned from the moment your bestfriends entered the common room.

“Muggle five second rule, Y/N! You were the one who told me about it to begin with!” He grinned from his spot sitting cross-legged on the floor in front of you.

You couldn’t help bursting into a fit of giggles, desperately trying to respond. “Rem- Remus! Please! Inform him that it doesn't apply to dropping a sandwich down an entire flight of stairs!”

“Believe me I tried, but he seemed pretty determined to eat it, hair and all after catching up to it.” Remus replied softly, a fond smile playing on his lips as you began making gagging noises of disgust.

“No! James Fleamont Potter, tell me you didn’t actually eat hair!” You laughed, extending your socked foot to shove him.

“I will suffice by just saying that, there may or may not have been a stray hair or two on it when I picked it up- Oh! Sirius, how was detention?” James trailed off to greet a certain boy and your demeanor immediately soured.

Your textbook on alchemical runes suddenly seemed like the most interesting thing in the world.

“It was worth it. Mcgonagall must be getting tired of me because she had me choose a book and read for three hours. Don’t let me interrupt the fun though. Looks like you’ve finally coaxed the Ice Queen to defrost for a bit. Shame I wasn’t here to see it.” He remarks, and you didn’t need to be looking at him to know he was wearing that infuriating smirk.

“Don’t worry, Black. I’ll never be able to truly relax knowing you’re still out running amuck. Next time you get written up, I’ll be sure to beg Mcgonagall to keep you chained outside with the rest of the wild animals.” An acute look of disgust etches across your face as you close your book, promptly shoving it into your bag.

“If you’re so desperate to see me in a collar, the person you need to be begging is right in front of you, doll.”

You could not have rolled your eyes harder at his remark. In a huff, you tug the strap of your bag around your frame and stand indignantly.

“You’re actually right for once. James? Keep your mutt on a tighter leash, before I’m forced to be the one that puts him down.” You sneer, flipping your hair over one shoulder and striding up to the girls dormitory before he can get in another word.

Remus sighed, unhappily leaning back against the couch he was currently sprawled across. “You just can’t help yourself, can you?”

Sirius watched as your figure disappeared up the stairs before turning to the boy, a dumb smile playing on his lips.

“She doesn’t hate me nearly as much as she tries to make you believe.” Was all he offered giddily before skillfully changing the subject.

———

Much like the infamous playboy Sirius Black, you were known for how frequently you broke the hearts of anyone you hooked up with. They found that sex with you was a spiritual experience, but were usually crushed when you made it clear you weren’t interested in recurring partners.

When Gryffindor’s Quidditch team won a mid-season match against Ravenclaw, James was relentless in persuading you to come to the after party. And though you weren’t originally keen on the idea, you figured it’d be an ample opportunity to relieve some stress.

The night had gone well. You’d garnered a nice buzz from the punch James made in his dorm and had your eyes fixed on Theodore Nott who’d been snuck in by Marlene.

Sirius, who was working his way onto his third cup of punch, watched you make eyes with the Slytherin boy from across the room.

He sat silently seething as you adjusted in your spot on the couch, crossing your legs while holding that snake’s gaze. In the end, all it took was the simple curl of your index finger for Theodore to hand his drink to an unimpressed Marlene and approach you.

Sirius watched as the two of you exchanged a handful of words before you sultrily dragged the boy away by his collar.

It took a minute for him to register that the styrofoam cup in his grasp was crushed.

After grabbing a napkin, he irritatedly ran a hand through his hair and his breath was ragged.

Why did he care that you were probably seconds from fucking a random guy? He definitely wasn’t one to judge, he’d been with plenty of people over the years.

However, no matter how many times he rolled the idea around in his head, he was getting angrier by the minute.

Remus approached him to spark up a conversation, but he was already slipping past him, towards the direction he watched you disappear to earlier.

He found you in the hallway, lip-locked with Theodore who had a grip on one of your exposed thighs. Meanwhile your hands were tangled in his hair.

Sirius’ body switched into autopilot, moving at such a speed that his brain couldn’t even keep pace.

He had harshly pulled the boy off of you, slung you onto his shoulder and made his way to his dorm. Partygoers standing confused as you beat his back, yelling at him to let you go. Once he’s on the stairs away from prying eyes, he delivers a sharp slap to the exposed skin on your thigh.

“Stop screaming bloody murder, Y/L/N.” is all he says and you bite your lip at the sting.

By the time he locked his door and tossed you onto his bed you’re looking at him like he’s insane. Scurrying to get off the mattress but he quickly grabs you ankle, pulling you back to where he dropped you.

“What the fuck has gotten into you!?” You hiss, watching him run a hand through his locks.

“I’m tired of waiting for you to stop being a brat and realize you like me. Tired of watching you hop on random dicks that aren’t mine. You want to get laid tonight? Fine, fuck me then.” He growls and you’re instantly overwhelmed.

“Did a screw come loose in your head? I don’t know what the hell you’re on but I’m not fucking you all people!” You respond by grasping a pillow from his bed and chucking it at his head. He easily catches it with a roll of his eyes.

“I’ve loved you since our first year, Y/N. And I’ve observed you long enough to know if you genuinely hated me or not.” He confesses and you freeze. His eyes were crystal clear and you’re at a loss of words so he continues.

He gently grasps one of your hands, bringing it up over his heart. You can very faintly feel his heart racing and your brows furrow. He was actually being genuine.

“You want fuck me so bad you’ve officially gone stupid?” You ask but he sees the tiniest smirk on your lips. And for whatever reason, you actually let him move in to kiss you.

He jumps a bit when you bite his bottom lip and you giggle before he’s pressing you back onto the bed.

It’s a fight for dominance, neither of you wanting to be the one that relents.

[lexa-lives-in-us]

Saving Tips for Hard Times

I found this old document where I collected a series of tips to save money. This is all part of my experience of when I was near homeless, and some work depending on where you live, some don’t. Here we go.

BILLS:

1. The optimum temperature for refrigerator operation is 5°C, and -18°C for freezer operation. As a rule of thumb, for each additional degree of refrigeration output about six percent more electricity is used.

2. Unplug your appliances. Lamps, microwave, tv, computers etc. They don't need to be plugged until you use them, and it saves energy to keep them unplugged. Therefore, money.

3. Do homework for phone companies and internet plans. Call them! Often they are toll free and if you mentioned that you were already with them or thinking of going with them and then found out another company had a better deal, they could offer you deals for lower prices. I had to do it all the time for my phone, until they couldn't really offer anything better.

4. BIKE. Invest in a used bike if you can, especially for the warmer months. It offsets the transit costs and better your health.

5. WALK. That's the same as the bike, honestly.

6. Pay your bills on time, you will avoid late fees which can up to HUNDREDS of dollars wasted over the course of a year. If you can, set up automatic payments so you don’t forget.

FRIDGE:

1. Every time the refrigerator door is opened, cold air escapes and warm ambient air enters. To compensate for the temperature increase in its interior, the refrigerator must then use energy to bring the temperature back down. Always avoid opening the door unnecessarily and for too long.

2. When defrosting frozen food place it in the refrigerator. Not only does this ensure that the food is carefully defrosted, its presence cools down the refrigerator interior, reducing the amount of work that the compressor has to do, and therefore lowering energy consumption.

3. Never put warm food in the refrigerator as this will heat up the interior, as well as other stored foods. Hot food should always be allowed to cool to room temperature before placing it in the refrigerator

MONEY:

1. Keep all the containers like glass bottles, juice bottles, jars, cans etc. Look for your Return-It depot and have trips to return them. They give back coins for laundry, small expenses etc

2. Use that junk mail. Go through it, find coupons for food, for essentials like toilet paper or shampoo.

3. CHECK. THAT. DOLLARSTORE. They often have things like pasta, ketchup, toilet paper, batteries etc for literally 1 dollar.  Pasta is pasta, toilet paper is toilet paper. Seriously. Don't need to spend 5$ on a shampoo bottle when you can have it for 1/5 of the price.

4. Do homework and check with different banks for which one offers a better plan. Some of them are willing to help out. Sit down with their advisors, find the best solution!

5. Use the envelope system! For example, one envelope with a label “food” the other with “entertainment” the other with “bills”. Then set the right amount of cash for each. That’s what you’re allowed to spend each month. If you realize you need more for food, grab it from the entertainment envelope. Adapt and arrange as needed.

6. If you can, set up an automatic saving (example 50$ every paycheck) for both regular saving AND an emergency fund.

7. Use the 24-Hour Rule. Avoid purchasing expensive or unnecessary items on impulse with a self-imposed 24-hour rule. For any non-essential item, wait 24 hours before purchasing. It’s perfect for online shopping where your items can simply be added to your cart to purchase later.

8. Make a grocery list BEFORE going to the grocery store and STICK to it. You’re going to avoid buying things you don’t really need.

9. DO. NOT. SHOP. WHILE. YOU. ARE. HUNGRY. Or you’ll end up buying food that you actually don’t need just because you feel snacky!

10. Only use ATMs from your bank, or you get charged small fees.

11. Set a “No Spend Day” per week, where you consciously DO NOT spend any money for that day.

12. Ditch the paper: Cutting out paper towels and using cloths and napkins that you can simply wash and reuse is a simple way to save.

13. After you wear clothes, hang them outside your wardrobe, on a door or something. You can air them out a bit, then stick them in the closet without washing. You can basically reuse the same clothes two or three times without having to wash them, sometimes they just need a bit of air and they won’t smell AT ALL.

14. If you don’t own or want to spend money on an iron, hang whatever blouse you need to iron in the bathroom while you shower. The steam will humidify the fabric and straighten it up.

15. Hang stuff to dry. Really don’t need to spend money on the dryer.

16. Sign up to the library. They have so many books and DVDs nowadays. You can also just go, sit at the library and stay warm for a while, so that you don’t have to sit at home and either suffer the cold or use money on your own heat.

17. Budget, budget, budget. Get a lil notebook, write down the monthly expenses, cut what you don’t need. It gets easier with time.

 FOOD:

1.       Make a meal plan. Write 10-14 days worth of dishes that you can do (lunch, dinner, everything you need). You can then toss them around as you go on with your week, but that way you have a pretty clear idea of what you use and the food you go through for how long. It also reduces the risks of getting take out since you already have plans for what to eat.

2.       Cook double! Seriously. Make that dinner and double it up. Leftovers can be frozen or put in the fridge for the day after.

3.       Meal prep. Once a week, prep a bunch of different recipes. Let them cool down, stick them in the freezer. At that point you’ll already have all these meals at the ready to just thaw/microwave or oven up.

4.       You don’t need pop. You don’t need alcohol. You most likely don’t need milk, but go for it if you wanna. Just remember dairy products go bad WAY more quickly than non dairies, so consider getting food and drinks with no dairy in them. Mainly, though. Water. Just drink water. Lots of it too! Sometimes our brain can’t tell the difference between hunger and thirst. You think you’re snacky? Drink some water instead! It’ll quell your hunger.

5.       Freeze fruit! If you think you’re not gonna be able to eat fruit in time, put it in a Tupperware or a ziplock and slap it in the freezer. You’ll be able to then use it for smoothies.

6.       Use the Italian saying “Colazione da re, pranzo da nobili, cena da poveri.” Which quite literally means “Breakfast as a king, lunch as a noble, dinner as a poor.” Breakfast should be very filling, carbs, protein, vitamins. It carries you for the whole day. Lunch should be quite filling too! But supper doesn’t really need a lot of it, and if you REALLY have to skip a meal, skip supper. Your body doesn’t need that much sustenance while sleeping.

7.       This is for the desperate times but I’ve done it, and I would do it again if I ever had to. Go to markets that have like… Fruits and veggies. Talk to them. Ask them “HEY, can I have the fruit/veggie that you have to throw away?” Ask them if you can have the ugly produce, the one that doesn’t look pretty enough to be put out. Or ask them to have whatever extra they have to dump because is past the expiry date. EXPIRY DATE IS USUALLY MUCH LONGER THAN WHAT THE LABEL SAYS. I wouldn’t risk it with dairy stuff or with things that are VERY expired, but one or two days? Totally fine, I promise. And if you have to? Dumpster Dive. Especially at markets with fruit and veggies that have to be sold on the same day (because it’s not considered “fresh” past that day.) Or behind pizza places like Dominos or Panago or whatever chain. They get pizza orders wrong all the time. Just give a peak behind these buildings and look inside their boxes. You have no idea how many times I found perfectly fine pizzas. For free! IF YOU DUMPSTER DIVE, MAKE SURE YOU HAVE GLOVES, A MASK AND PLASTIC BAGS TO PUT YOUR STUFF IN. ONCE AT HOME, DISCARD GLOVES AND WASH PRODUCE THROUGHLY. Also check tumblr for your divers community, they usually know the best spots.

 CLOTHES:

1.       Thrift shop! So many GOOD used clothes are out there! Honestly! My whole wardrobe is thrifted and everything looks brand new. It takes a bit of research and maybe that shirt you liked is not in your size, but you can find EVERYTHING, from socks to bras, at a thrift store. Don’t thrift underwear though. You want to go new with those.

2.       Invest in some needle and thread, then open youtube. There are SO MANY tutorials that teach you how to mend holes in socks and underwear. And really, no one will really notice if a mend is perfectly done or not. After a week, you’ll forget it too! But that prevents you from throwing away clothes that could just be mended a little.

3.       Something doesn’t fit you? Too small, too big? YouTube, homie. They have tutorials on how to fix these kinda things! All you need, again, is needle and thread.

4.       Organize clothes swaps with friends and/or neighbors. Everyone brings clothes they don’t need, put them in a pile. Go through the pile and grab whatever there is. There’s no money exchange, one could go home with 1 item and one could go home with 50 items. Who cares? The extra stuff… DONATE IT TO A SHELTER.

Feel free to add more, and stay safe!

[hello-everyfandom]

"For a moment, listen silently, what does your heart say?”

Warnings: N/A

Pairing: Sirius Black x Reader

Words: 4k

Summary: Suffering lovers and hearts to be mended and stitched back together

Part One “I love you more than the sky and the ground but I can’t do this anymore.”

Part Two “No, it’s over. She ended it.”

(This one is quite long! How hopes and dreams turn into the most painful writing one could ever print. Please, I wish for my own heart to mend as Sirius’ will.)

The next few weeks were nothing but tragic. Lily could barely get you out of your bed nevertheless to class. It seemed that the fight, the breakup, the hurting wore down your stamina until you were not able to stand. It was worse after the party. Before, you could numb the pain of losing Sirius by distracting yourself with rewriting notes and organizing your room. But after the party, after seeing the love of your life lip-locked with another girl, kissing her the way he should kiss you, something in you broke.

Lily sat gently on your bed, placing the cup of warm tea on your table. She whispered kindly, “We have class in an hour, you missed breakfast but I brought you a cuppa.” She moved the duvet that covered your face to see your innocent watering eyes looking up at her. She sighed and smoothed out your hair, feeling the shutters of cries leave your lips. “You need to go to class, Y/N. I can’t keep telling McGonagall you’re sick without her sending you to St. Mungos.” 

“I don’t want to go.”

“Think about it this way,” Lily continued to run her fingers through your hair. She was thankful she had been able to get you to take a warm shower yesterday and change your pajamas, “If you go, you get it done and over with. Then you can come back and we can lay in your bed all afternoon.”

“I’m tired.”

“That’s why I brought you tea. Come on, love, it’s really time to get up.” Lily said gently, pushing the duvet so it was only covering your torso. Instead of sitting up, you blinked back tears before sputtering out.

“I made a mistake, didn’t I?” you covered your mouth, clutching your eyes shut to let out a cry. “I made a mistake breaking up with him. I’m an idiot. I’m a fool.”

“No, no,” Lily cooed, moving your hand from your mouth and petting your cheek, “No, you didn’t. You did what you thought was right at the time.”

“Then why does it hurt so bad?”

Lily didn’t have the answer, she could only reply with the utmost sympathy, “because you still love him.”

“Get up, you sad sack of shit. We’ve got charms in twenty minutes.” James flung the covers off of Sirius. His nose wrinkled at the sight of crumpled tissues that littered his bed. “That’s disgusting. Those tissues better not be from what I think it’s from.”

“You’re a right prick,” Sirius tried to smile, his lips cracked and chapped. 

“You’re not staying in bed anymore, and frankly you smell like shit.”

“It’s true,” Remus chimed in, straightening his tie and his hair. 

“So what? Leave me here. I don’t want to go anyways.”

“Right. Listen, Pads, we’ve been kind to you for a while now, but now, and I say this as sweetly and as loving as I can, we’re getting quite sick of your sulking.” James rolled his eyes.

“Oh wow, thanks,” Sirius said sarcastically, buttoning his shirt up. “You really know how to rip the plaster off, yeah?”

“Maybe if we obliviate you, you’ll become yourself once more,” Remus said wittily.

“I’ll permit it if it allows my memory to forget kissing that girl at the party.” Sirius nearly threw up at the memory of that girl’s lips on his.

James shrugged, throwing a tie at Sirius, “Well, we mean it with love and we know the break up has been hard but-”

“But?”

“But we miss our friend.” Peter finished. Remus nodded in agreement.

“It’s not easy, is all,” Sirius mumbled after brushing his teeth. 

James slapped his hand on his shoulder and said confidently, “No, it’s not. But that’s why we’ll all go through it together, as brothers.” and swiftly lead him out of the dorm room.

As Lily locked her arms in yours and the two of you walked from the Great Hall to class, you were distracted by the open windows of the corridors. The courtyard, which had just been littered with brown, orange, and red leaves, set a moment of comfort in your bones. You always enjoyed autumn, mostly because it was in fall when Sirius had first told you he loved you. You shook that memory out of your mind and looked at the hallway instead. Coincidentally, much to both Sirius and your demise, the marauders and Lily had accidentally crossed paths with each other on the way to class. Eyes like magnets were drawn close together as Sirius looked at you with storming emotions. He looked as if he hadn’t slept, and if he did manage to close his eyes, nightmares in the forms of memories followed him. To be fair, you didn’t look all that right either. Though you didn’t have as prominent bags under your eyes, underneath your loose clothing was skin and bone. Your appetite had lost you and eating became difficult as most of the time you felt sick to even think about food. Sirius looked at you, lost and longing, and you stared with the same intensity, wishing to be in his arms, to sleep for years and kiss until the sun explodes.

“Ms. Y/L/N, will you please stay after class?” McGonagall’s voice rang out in her sharp tone. You froze and looked at Lily worriedly who shrugged.

“You’ll be fine, don’t worry. Meet me in the common room after,” Lily whispered, squeezing your arm before leaving the classroom. It was loud and full of chatter from the students who excitedly were headed to dinner. You waited, pushing hair behind your ears nervously as the students collected their things and filed out of the room. Then, it was silent. You approached McGonagall’s office in the back of her classroom slowly, dreading whatever scolding she would give you. As you pushed open the door, you thought in your head quickly, you had handed in the homework, taken notes in class, raised your hand when asked a question, you couldn’t place anything you did particularly wrong and yet your palms began to sweat.

“Yes, Professor?” you asked with a small voice. McGonagall looked up from her desk and peered at you from her glasses. “Have I done something wrong?”

“Do you think you have done something wrong?”  

“I don’t reckon so, but I’m open to hearing any criticism if need be.” you focused on keeping your voice steady.

“Although, I’m sure you know the answer already, do you know what my particular job is here at Hogwarts?”

You bit your lip, “You’re a professor, perhaps one of the best ones here, of my favorites as well.”

“While I enjoy your compliment,” McGonagall sighed, “I am also the head of the Gryffindor house.”

“Yes, of course.” you nodded.

“And, with such a job comes the responsibility of looking after my students as if they were my own.”

“I’m not sure I understand, Professor.” 

“Sit, please, Ms. Y/L/N.” McGonagall motioned to the seat in front of her desk, a nice plush armchair with maroon velvet. “Despite the belief of my students, I do care, and I notice especially when a particular student seems out of place.” 

You sat on the edge of the seat and played with the threads of your sweater. “If it is my work that is not up to standard, I am sure I can revise or revisit whatever it is that has gotten low marks.”

“Your school work is hardly of the matter here,” Professor looked at the small girl in front of her. Once fiery and loud turned into a pebble on the floor. She admired and quite enjoyed having you as a student and took great pride in knowing you wore the Gryffindor sigil on your robes. But, like your friends, she had noticed an extreme change in demeanor in the past few weeks. “Are you doing alright, Y/N?” she asked kindly.

You looked up in surprise, “Yes, Professor. Though I will say, I will be disappointed if any of my homework or essays have been less than acceptable. I seem to be going through a little bit of a rough patch, I suppose.”

“I noticed,” you froze as McGonagall spoke, “Does this have anything to do with Mr. Black?”

“I-” you couldn’t think of an excuse. McGonagall put her hand up to stop your from speaking,

“Please, I may be older and I may be a teacher, but the students here seem to forget the Professors hear everything.”

You began to beg, “Professor, please, I promise whatever had happened will not affect my school nor my studies-”

She cut you off, “Have a biscuit, Y/L/N.” she motioned to the biscuit tin in front of her desk. When you showed signs of being wary, she opened the top of the tin and pushed it closer to you. Your hands shook as you took one and began to nibble on the edges.

“I do not speak of this, and I trust whatever I tell you and whatever you tell me stays in this office,” she started, you nodded furiously and she continued, “when I was younger, much much younger, perhaps about your age, I too fell in love.”

Your mouth fell agape.

“Dougal McGregor. I met him after my years at Hogwarts before I began my position at the ministry. It was, as most would say, a teenage love affair. We were much like you and Mr. Black. We argued senselessly, but we nevertheless loved each other. When he proposed, I was delighted. I accepted immediately.” your eyebrows rose to ask questions, however, McGonagall merely pushed the biscuit tin towards you again. You complied and took another.

“However, at the time, marriage between a muggle and a witch was proven more difficult than current times. Spouses of magical descent were forbidden to tell anyone of their skills in the wizarding world, and it. Well. The idea of living in a world without magic was unbearable. I had to make a decision.”

“What happened then, Professor?”

“I thought rejecting his proposal would be right for both of us, Dougal and I. I thought it was unfair to be kept in a magic-less marriage whilst Dougal would, in turn, be lied to every day. I made a decision and as a result,” her voice became low, almost sensitive, “I broke his heart and mine as well.”

“Oh Professor, I’m so sorry.”

“While it is in the past, I do think about him often. But, I suppose the feelings you are currently experiencing are what I felt when I left for the last time to London.”

“I see. Forgive me, Professor, why are you telling me this?” 

“Because I want you to know the consequences of decision making. The difference between truly thinking with your head and with your heart.” 

“Did you regret leaving?”

McGonagall pursed her lips in thought, the wrinkles shown prominently near her eyes, “Yes and no. I am overjoyed and proud to stand as the witch I am today. Becoming a professor and working with students, no matter how particularly unenjoyable some are, is a passion. However, it would be ignorant to say I did not frequently think about if I had stayed and married Dougal.”

“What happened to him?”

“I received a letter numerous months later, my mother had told me, Dougal married and was expecting his firstborn.”

“Oh,” you whispered.

“I find it humorous to sit here,” McGonagall gave you a wrinkled small smile.

“How so, Professor?”

“Because when I was heartbroken, the first person I told was my own teacher, you may know him now as Headmaster Dumbledore.”

“Really?” you asked in surprise.

“Yes, we sat here at my desk whilst I told him of my heartache. And now, I sit here, with my own favorite student, discussing hers.”

“I’m not sure if I would call it heartache, Professor,” 

“Then what would you call it?”

In class, Professor McGonagall was strict, sharp spoken. Instead, in her small office, she wore a sympathetic smile and her gaze was warm. You felt as though life and its troubles would cease their crimes against your broken heart the second you stepped in the room. But, still, you looked at her with lost sights, emotions swarming in pupils.

“I don’t think there is a word to describe it. All I know is I ache tremendously and nothing seems to fix this pit in my stomach. I. What do I do?” you begged for an answer.

“I’m afraid I cannot answer that. What I can say is, you’ve been thinking your entire life at Hogwarts with your head. You are a bright witch with a wonderful future ahead of her. You are hardworking and studious, and kind. But, you only seem to listen to your head for answers, you look for the logical position for your chess pieces. Stop your thinking. For a moment, listen silently, what does your heart say?”

Professor McGonagall looked at the time before sighing to herself, “I do suppose I’ve kept you too long, I trust you can find your way back to the common room?”

You nodded and stood, brushing off your skirt. “Of course. Thank you Professor for the biscuits. If it means anything, I’m sure Dougal loved you very much.”

“Y/L/N,” Professor called before you left, “You are welcome any time here, I was not lying when I said you were one of my favorite students.” 

You smiled back, “And I wasn’t lying when I said you were one of my favorite Professors.”

As you walked back to the Gryffindor common room, Professor McGonagall’s story repeated in your head, pounding against your brain and begging to be analyzed. If you thought carefully, letting go of Sirius was equivalent to McGonagall’s separation with Dougal. If you chose your studies and your career, Would you miss out on a life with your soulmate? There was no doubt in your mind that your heart belonged to a certain long-haired beloved. As the Fat Lady looked at you with great pity, you entered the common room, peaking around for Lily. The fire seemed to be the only source of warmth as it lit up the room, leaving shadows cast along the walls. You figured Lily must still be at dinner considering the common room was empty. You rubbed your tired eyes and sat on an armchair facing the fireplace. 

Sirius had decided wallowing was doing nothing but driving him across the wall. He threw a shirt over his shoulders and bounced down the stairs to meet the boys at dinner when he saw you. He could spot you from miles away even if he were blind to the bone. He recognized the old sweater you wore, one that had previously been owned by him. You loved the sweater despite threads coming loose and the smell of Sirius’ cologne fading away. He saw your hands curled up in fists, something you did when you were quite emotional or tired and the low messy bun you had pulled your hair into.

“I thought you were at dinner, Lils,” you spoke quietly, making him freeze. It had been so long, so many minutes and hours since he’d last heard your voice. “If you are here to drag me to the Great Hall, I have to decline as I’m morbidly exhausted from that emotional conversation with McGonagall.” 

Sirius attempted to find his voice, begging his vocal cords to say anything to you but all he could do was stand there, dumbfounded and aching to hear your voice once more. 

“Lily?” you expected to see your red-headed friend but instead made eye contact with him. “Oh.”

“Just Sirius,” he said awkwardly. You stood so you could face him, holding your hands in front of you.

You swallowed harshly and wished you had at least looked somewhat more manageable. “Sirius.”

“Y/N.” he answered. It was hushed, noiseless, painful. “Say something,” he begged.

“What do you want me to say, Siri?” he flinched when you used his nickname. You hadn’t even meant to use it, it just slipped off your tongue before you could realize it.

“Just. Say anything, yell at me, anything. Be angry at me!”

“Why would I be angry?” You weren’t angry. You were hurt.

“For...”

“For what?” you creased your eyebrows. 

“For kissing that girl at the party.”

You pursed your lips and Sirius only held sadness in his eyes. “Sirius...”

“I kissed another girl that wasn’t you, and it is absolutely tearing me apart. I want you to be angry with me.”

“I can’t.”

“Be mad! Yell at me!”

“Sirius,” you stopped him, putting a gentle, small hand on his arm, “We broke up.”

Sirius threw his arms in the air and ran a finger through his hair frustratedly, “that doesn’t make it okay.”

“Doesn’t it? We broke up,”

“No! It doesn’t because I told you, I promised you, I swore I would never kiss another person. I promised I was yours and yours only. And I am. I mean... I was.”

“Sirius, please,” you choked, “It’s hard enough to be around each other already.”

“Don’t you miss me? Miss us?” Sirius had to stop himself from gathering you in his arms and rubbing the small of your back. Biting your lip and eyes beginning to water, you said as quietly as you could,

“Of course I do. I miss you more and more every day. And yes, it... it hurt to see you with that Ravenclaw girl, but it doesn’t matter. We aren’t dating anymore.”

“I don’t know. I think.” He laughed humourlessly, as if the air escaping his lungs were nearly painful to feel, “I think I would’ve gone mental if I had seen you kissing someone.”

“I...” you stopped and sighed. You sat down on the couch, moving slightly to the left. Sirius looked cautiously before sitting next to you, facing you as you looked towards the fire. 

“We can still talk, can’t we? We used to talk all night until Moony would shush us like an old librarian.”

“I don’t know, Sirius. It’s hard. Isn’t it? It’s hard.”

“I know. But, I miss talking. Won’t you just tell me how you’re doing?”

You debated on lying, telling him you were fantastic, but something in you begged you to tell the truth even if it felt like magma on your tongue. “I’m not doing well.”

“Are you stressed about school? I’ve told you many times, you’re the smartest witch in our year, I doubt you have anything to worry about.”

“That’s not it.” you bit your lip, turning from the fire to look at those eyes you so deeply longed for.

“Then what?”

“It’s difficult.”

“Try me.”

“It’s difficult... with us, or without us, I should say.”

Sirius slightly flinched hearing those words and swallowed harshly, “I get the feeling.”

“How have you been?” you asked curiously, studying the way his eyebrows creased and his fingers threading through his hair.

“Same as you, I suppose.”

“Really?”

“Prongs and the boys, they’ve been on my back lately. Say I’ve been moping too much, I’m a downer it seems.”

You giggled under your breath and wrapped your arms around yourself, “Lily says the same. Though, I guess she’s just worried.”

“Worried?”

“I haven’t been sleeping as well, I’m sure you’ve noticed the bags under my eyes,”

“No,” Sirius said truthfully, “I think you still look as beautiful as ever.”

Your lungs stopped breathing, every airway and vein in your body closed as you began to shut down. You stood abruptly and began racing towards the dorm staircase.

“Stop!” Sirius shouted making you freeze, your hand still on the banister. “Stay. Talk to me.”

You wiped angry tears from your face that you didn’t even notice dripped down your cheeks, “And say what? It. it’s torturous, it’s beyond excruciating to be around you.” You thought about your chat with McGonagall, begging your heart to speak, scream anything to make to stop your head from making decisions.

Sirius’ lips frowned, hurt at your tone and your words. “Baby...”

“No! I. It’s too difficult.”

“Why?”

“Because when I look at you, when I see you, when I feel you around me, everything tells me I’ve made a mistake. Is that what you wanted to hear? I made a mistake. I fucked up. I fucked up because I was terrified of us. I was scared of driving you away, scared of you deciding you didn’t love me anymore. And I can’t. I can’t do it! I can’t. I made a mistake.” you spat out breathlessly. Sirius watched in horror as you began to hyperventilate and dove to put his arms around you. He had seen your panic attacks and held you through every one, but this time it felt different. Your breathing began to rapidly increase as you couldn’t hold back broken sobs. 

“Breathe, breathe, love. It’s okay. It’s all okay.” he held your face in his hands, cupping your cheeks like he used to. Your eyes searched his desperately for any buoy that could save you from the drowning you felt. As he blinked, you found your life vest, holding on for dear life as you breathed fresh air into scattered lungs.

“Breathe, okay? ‘M right here, not going anywhere.” he whispered low, kissing your forehead and wiping your tears.

“I’m sorry.” you sobbed, “I made a mistake. I love you. I do. I’m so sorry. What have I done? I love you. I love you more than anything, and I’ve ruined it all.” you threw yourself at him, arms gripping tightly as he caught you. Sirius’ arms snaked around yours, pulling you back to life, back to the earth. He was yours. He knew it. He’s never been anyone elses and he never plans to. How stupid he had been to let you go, to kiss another girl, to pretend he was okay when he was truly devastated. 

“We’re okay, yeah? Take care of each other, now, yeah?” Sirius rocked you slowly, feeling your cries die down in the comfort of his arms. 

“I’m so sorry.”

“Me too, darling.” Sirius guided you slowly to the couch, setting you comfortably on the cushions, “sit for a while,”

You nodded loosely as you leaned on his chest, hiccuping with cries. “I thought I was doing the right thing, leaving you. Had I known how wrong it was, I would’ve thrown myself off the Astronomy tower before ever breaking up with you.” 

“Don’t say that,” Sirius hushed, “I know, you thought it was the right thing. You were trying to protect yourself and me.”

“I’m a fool. A stupid, foolish girl.” you muttered, still catching your breath.

“Don’t say that either. I made mistakes too, perhaps one I’ll regret for the rest of my life.”

“Oh, Sirius.” you began to cry again, “I don’t care if you kissed another girl. I don’t. I just care that I’m the girl you want next to your side.”

He turned your limp body so he could cup your cheeks again, rubbing with the pads of his thumbs. “You will always be the girl. Always. Nothing will change that.”

“Sirius,” you whispered, looking at his lips.

“Yes, love?”

“Kiss me.”

That was all Sirius needed to hear. For days, weeks, endless hours, the two of you, broken hearted souls walked the earth wondering when the pain would end. Sirius tried drinking, you tried swallowing textbooks whole. Nothing seemed to work. Nothing seemed to mend the hurt you felt panging your insides, sending waves of heat down your spines. Nothing could distract you from the absolute shattering sadness that your bodies felt. Two broken hearted souls. Two souls joining for a kiss. A kiss that would last centuries as Sirius vowed to marry you the minute your lips connected. Togetherness, the touch of a soulmate. He moved his lips against yours slowly, tasting, memorizing and wishing this moment would never end. Salty tears and content smiles, at last, the two broken souls found what truly mended, what stitched your hearts back together. Each other. Forever in eternity, never drifting apart for long as fate, the universe and every good hearted soul brought you two together. 

[beelspillowpet]

Hi hi so this has been in my head since this morning, how would the brothers react with mc giving them a surprise massage, like they suddenly barge into their room and just massage them since mc saw that they've been more stressed then usual.

🙊

Sorry it took me so long to get to this! I’ve been trying to catch up on my content starting today!!

I myself am a big fan of physical affection, even if it’s not intimate. So randomly getting massages sounds adorable... <3

MC Gives Surprise Massages!

Lucifer

Oh god does he need it. He sits up at his desk all day, working on as much paperwork as he can before he crashes. And that’s if nothing else happens for that day. You better believe his back is suffering.

He has a habit of leaning forward in his chair too much. He hates it, but his posture is awful. Which results in pain in his upper back, shoulders, and mid back, all along the spine.

You would be doing him a massage favor by taking care of any of those. Let’s say for the sake of platonic behavior, you’re merely rubbing his shoulders in circles while he works. You don’t require conversation. You just want him to not tense up as much.

He’s much more relaxed and his posture is better by the end of it. He mutters a soft ‘thank you’ to you as you exit out the door. He doesn’t mind when you do this; it’s the exact opposite really. He adores that you’re simply just trying to help him relax since he’s been so stressed and tense lately.

Mammon

He probably isn’t tense? But he’s for sure stressed. I mean he’s a trouble maker, and it’s sort of scary being in trouble when lucifer is breathing down your neck. That and various other things like school and work, and feeding his constant greed, and yeah. A massage sounds nice.

Truth be told, even just sitting with him is grand, because he feels the intensity in his body melting away at the sight of you. He’s down bad, for sure.

You come to him when he’s stressing over homework, to be exact. He’s about to throw in the towel before you barge in, startling him. You don’t even speak, you just go and start rubbing his shoulders. He’s almost like putty in your hands.

He almost doesn’t want to continue. He’s so at ease under your touch, but he’s also questioning what you want. Why are ya’ botherin’ me, MC!? Just ignore him; he’s loving it, deep down inside.

Leviathan

AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH! STOOOOOPPPPPPP!! Dooooon’t touch meeee!!! QoQ

He’s tense as hell. His posture is probably the worst out of all of his brothers. It doesn’t help that he sleeps in a bathtub either.  When you barge in his room he’s sputtering and nearly screaming. Wh- HENRY!? You forgot to use the password!!!

You actually have to tell him to sit still. Otherwise he will not. He still sort of squirms and cries under your touch, though. Admittedly, he’s never really gotten a massage before. Go figure. So imagine his shock at how much better he feels after the fact.

He doesn’t really say anything at first. A soft little hum of appreciation. Sometimes when you barge in to do that again, he just lays back and lets you, while he plays his game. He still will never get used to your touch, but he enjoys it nonetheless.

Satan

His posture is actually pretty good. He sits up straight in his seat while he reads. However, all that anger deep inside of him makes his body tense, and that leads to discomfort. Mostly in his shoulders and face.

He’s a bit irritated at how you barged into his room like that. Like, couldn’t you just fucking knock like everyone else? He’s about to protest, but your hands are already on his shoulders, working their magic.

He leans into your touch, still questioning what you’re doing, but he’s smart. If all those books in his room aren’t proof enough of it. He relaxes into your touch, eyes still scanning the page, but not really reading.

He adores you, secretly. You’re so kind him. You’ve taught him what love feels like, and there aren’t enough words in the world to describe how grateful he is to you. So at the very least, he can stay put and allow you to massage him. He’s happy.

Asmodeus

Absolutely not stressed about a goddamn thing in the world. His beauty and perfection beats all.

Would absolutely NEVER turn down an offer of a massage from you. A full body massage is most likely what he’ll ask for. He’ll even guide you through it if you need him to.

His favorite is when you come in while he’s taking care of his skincare routine. Roll up your pant legs and sit on the edge of the tub while you massage him. Hell, get naked in the tub and massage him that way!

Whatever you decide to do, he is very keen on telling you he loves and appreciates it. Did you honestly expect anything less from your favorite overly affectionate demon man!?

Beelzebub

Nothing beats a massage. Maybe except for food. But still, a massage from MC? He wouldn’t ever dream of missing out on that.

He’s probably in the kitchen eating when you barge in. Without a word to him, you circle around his seat and your hands are on his broad shoulders. He’s still eating happily, but now he just wants to share his food with you. Why are you giving him a massage? :)

He’s not tense or anything. He’s almost too relaxed. Truthfully, if you wanted to work some tenseness out of his body, you’d probably have a better job working on his legs or feet. He’s used to being on them a lot, but that’s exactly the problem.

He stretches before and after working out. But still, that doesn’t solve everything. You’re better off catching him a little after a workout. That’s when he’s extremely sore and doesn’t like moving.

Belphegor

A massage is the perfect way to get him to sleep. Especially if he’s having trouble doing so. He’s not really a fan of you busting down the door for it, though, but he won’t complain for long.

Like Beel, he’s almost too relaxed. It makes sense for him though. You have to be relaxed to be able to sleep well, right? All his problems must roll off his shoulders so easily.

Instead of trying to get him to relax, it’s more a method of getting him to sleep. It works like a charm every single time, and before long he’s sleeping softly. He more so enjoys the headpats than anything else, but who is he to direct you? By all means.

He’ll likely become addicted to them. Hey MC, I was thinking... could you give me another massage? Please? :) I wouldn’t ask anyone else but you. You’re so good at it! He’s spoiled. He’s spoiled and you love him for it.

[miss-tc-nova]

Impatience and Motivation - Xehanort x Reader

The downside to the “Red String” AU is that it feels a bit too straight forward. Follow the string, find your soulmate, tada! Unless you have someone trying to defy their fate or write angst like my first attempt. But, I got to thinking about it and chruned this baby out super fast, so it’s kinda messy, but it was fun. So here’s terrible take 2 of the Red String AU with Xehanort. 

~~~~~

              “Alright, look you, just tell me where you were when the tarts disappeared and I won’t call in my baking partner.”

              The boy with slate colored hair gives an awkward smile. “I was with you, remember? We were working on the history homework the Master gave us.”

              My shoulders drop. “Oh yeah. Okay, you’re clear. You can go. Eraqus!”

              From the table where he and Urd sit, the boy looks visibly nervous; as the most likely suspect, he should be. I wave a finger at him to come closer.

              Just as the anxious kid stands to take his turn in interrogation, the classroom door slams open. Vor bursts into the room.

              “OKAY! I DID IT!” Eraqus shouts, no doubt in fear of what my “partner,” Vor, would do to him. “I couldn’t help it! They were just so good!”

              “I KNEW IT!” I shout, preparing to pounce on the criminal.

              “What’s wrong?”

              Urd’s question tears my attention back to Vor, who’s heaving as if she’d run up here all the way from the docks.

              “Th…The docks,” she gasps.

              Oh, apparently she did.

              “There was a stranger at the docks.”

              “What’s wrong with that?” Hermod asks. “Everyone goes to the docks.”

              She shakes her head, still trying to catch her breath before pointing to the roof. “He fell from the sky!”

              “What?!” I exclaim.

              “No way! Let’s go see!”

              I’m almost one hundred percent certain that this is Eraqus’s excuse to escape his punishment, but I admit that I, too, am curious about the stranger from the sky.

              We nearly leave poor Vor behind in the rush to get to downstairs, but just as we reach the balcony overlooking the foyer, the front doors to the citadel open. The Master leads the way along with another of the school’s teachers, but behind them our classmates, Bragi and Baldr, are dragging in an unconscious boy between them.

              The gears in my brain catch on something as I watch the group pass. Silver hair hides the young man’s face but I already can’t stop staring at him.

              Right up until it catches my eye.

              Everyone in existence is born with the Red String of Fate that binds two people as soulmates. It remains invisible early in life, but reveals itself as a person reaches puberty—because teens really needed more drama to deal with. Depending on how close the soulmates are, the length of the string can change. Mine has always been the tiniest length, not even the width of the nail on my pinky finger where it sat. That kind of separation was daunting but I let myself forget about it, telling myself I’d worry about it when I had the power to travel the worlds.

              But there it is, stretching the distance to wrap around the stranger’s finger.

              My hand lifts, testing if what I was seeing was really a thread connecting us. No matter how I waved it, I couldn’t find a break in the line. It’s him—he’s my soulmate.

              “Ow!”

              My heart stammers once I realize my hand just made contact with Hermod’s face.

              “Oh, sorry!” I exclaim, watching him rub his nose. “I’m sorry!”

              “Are you okay?” Urd asks.

              Of course, other people can’t see the red string of others; they wouldn’t know—I barely know.

              “Yeah, I…I’m fine,” I say, not actually sure that I am. “I have to check something. I’ll see you guys later.”

              Before they can ask me any more questions, I race down the stairs.

              Abandoning my friends was apparently for nothing as I’ve completely lost track of the group. My string tries leading me through walls and even into a bathroom, until I finally run into Baldr and Bragi.

              “Woah, what’s the rush?” Bragi asks as I nearly bowl poor Baldr to the ground.

              “That boy,” I gasp. “Where is he?”

              Baldr makes sure I’m steady before letting me go. “He’s in the infirmary.”

              “Yeah, dude’s out cold,” Bragi adds.

              I don’t wait another second before I bolt down the hall.

              Again, all for nothing—the staff at the infirmary won’t let me see him. I can see the red line reaching past them, passing through a curtain wall, but it’s no use—no guests until he’s cleared by them which will probably take a few days.

              And what an agonizing few days those are. I can’t sleep, I can’t focus on class, I barely allow myself five minutes to eat before I’m pestering the infirmary staff and they’re quickly getting sick of me. Even my classmates have noticed my behavior, but I haven’t found the words or sense to tell them yet. I’m living in my own little world of madness that would probably dissolve if I could just meet him.

              In the student dorms, I lie on my bed and stare at the ceiling, slowly driving myself insane wondering just when I’ll get to meet the mysterious boy. I’ve thought about what I’ll say or what I’d do, all the cheesy romantic things that could happen, but for the love of the gods, I just want to meet him. I don’t know what will happen after that—I haven’t thought about it; all I know is that my life will change forever with him in it.

              The red suddenly moves. Turning my attention on the string, I see it slowly moving across the room at a rate anyone in the citadel would not be capable of.

              “So yeah, that’s pretty much everything.”

              That’s Eraqus coming down the hall. That itself wouldn’t be so strange—he’s my neighbor—except he’s moving practically in time with the movement of my string.

              “And this is my room, so if you ever need anything, I’m right here.”

              It stops; they’re right outside my door.

              “Cool. Thanks.”

              The second voice, the new voice, sends my heart into overdrive. Immediately, I sit up on high alert—it’s him.

              “No problem,” Eraqus says. “Dinner’s in about an hour; wanna hang out until then?”

              “No, that’s okay. There’s something I wanna check out.”

              “Okay. Well, like I said, you know where to find me if you need something. If I can’t find it, I know people who can!”

              “Alright. Thanks.”

              I hear Era’s door open and close but the string doesn’t move. Everything is perfectly still except the heart pounding in my chest. Slowly, as if any sudden movement will wake me from such a cruel dream, I get to my feet and cross the room, just to hesitate at the door.

              “I know you’re in there.”

              I can’t tell whether his soft accusation is for me or his own affirmation, but it sends goosebumps racing across my skin.

              Taking the handle to my door, I finally get to meet the person made just for me.

              Immediately, my eyes glue to the shimmering silver that makes his gaze. I could drown in it, never to resurface and be perfectly happy.

              He’s the first to break with a whisper. “Hi.”

              “Hi.” My voice isn’t much better.

              His eyes finally drop and I follow suit. Between us is his open palm, the red string wrapped around his pinky. Lifting my hand beside his, I examine the string, short and clear between our fingers—if there were doubts before, there are none now.

              For a second time, our eyes meet.

              “I’m Xehanort,” he says, still in quiet awe. His hand turns slightly.

              “_____.” I take the gesture, resting my hand in his.

              A wave of calm washes over me as everything in the world is suddenly right, instantly soothing all the anxiety and impatience I’d been suffering these last few days.

              Without warning, he pulls me against him, arms wrapped tightly around me and his face against my shoulder.

              “Thank you.”

              I’m literally stunned silent.

              “I never would’ve gotten off that hellhole island if it weren’t for you.” The crack in his voice breaks my heart. “You’re the reason I kept going.”

              “Xehanort,” I murmur, resting a hand in his hair.

              He pulls away, straightening up and smiling despite his tears. “Sorry. I’m okay. I’m just…relieved I guess.”

              Offering a smile, I brush away a stray tear. “Things are gonna get better, I promise.”

              He leans into my palm, looking entirely at peace. “Yeah, okay.”

              Trying to lighten things up, I squish his cheeks between my hands. “Now did Eraqus actually show you around, or did he just walk straight here?”

              Gods, that laugh would let me die happy right now.

              He pulls away. “I’m not even sure how I got here.”

              “I thought so. That boy is gonna owe me more than tarts now.”

              “What?”

              “You’ll see.”

[angeltears-writing]

The Brothers with Sick MC

Hey everyone requests and match-ups are open, MC has a common cold in this HC and I hope everyone is safe during this Pandemic.

Lucifer

 You are ill, naturally you were suffering.

This old man decides that when you are burning up with a fever, feel drowsy and on the verge of throwing up; it is the perfect time to lecture you on your weak immune system, diet and basically how it’s your fault you are sick.

 He cannot stop nagging at you but on the inside he’s super worried.

  When you wake up there’s a hot lemon tea and your favourite meal on your desk.

 He says you should move to his room at night so he can monitor your health.

 He rubs your head while you’re sleeping, he has to cuddle you despite the risk and when he leaves for RAD he puts warm towels over your head and he brings you extra blankets so you’re warm.

 He is a nagging mother hen but he cares so much about you so you bet he’ll nurse you back to health.

Mammon

 He is so dramatic, he’s praying by your bedside pleading you not to die from a sniffle nose.

He goes to the store and goes overboard. He buys any medicine he can get his hands on (where he got the money, we don’t know but if Levi asks where his figurines went and if Asmo asks what happened to his 3 piece jewelry sets pretend like you don’t hear anything.)

  He gives you a raspberry soda because he heard it helps bring fevers down and he wants you to have a treat not just icky medicine.

  Stays by your side all the time you’re ill and won’t take any model jobs unless you tell him otherwise.

 Dotes on you, rubs your feet, head, back and anywhere that hurts.

Tucks you in very tightly, “Now don’t think of moving a muscle ‘kay the Great Mammon has just tucked yer in so you better sleep human!” he says while petting your head and checking your temperature.

When you’re finally better he says you have to pay him back for his services and yes he takes cash, credit cards or kisses as payment options.

Levi

 Ew gross sick normie germs, don’t you dare get anywhere near Levi he can’t afford to get sick, he has 3 events to get the no.1 spot for so he can’t get ill.

 When he finds out you’re sick he locks his door, you are not getting into his fortress anytime soon.

  He starts wearing a sneeze guard around for extra protection and runs away from your hugs.

 You’re gross, sweaty and crying because he keeps avoiding you and is not being nice to you at all.

 He feels bad, so just before you go to bed one night he knocks on your door and leaves a tray with your meds, a new cuddle toy and a flower.

 He gets you a portable game so you’re entertained while in bed and plays with from his room so you can hang out with each other online.

 When he realises you’re staying home from RAD he makes you take over two of his campaigns during the day in exchange of him helping you do the homework you missed.

 When you’re all better he’ll make it up to you for not being so hands on at first, but he also gets better at being more caring and nurturing over time.

Satan

  HUSBAND MATERIAL

 He has already gone to collect all the medicine you need for a full recovery plus found a couple of natural herbal health recipes that are boosters.

 He reads to you every night and after you take medication that makes you drowsy.

 Will never make you feel icky or gross but at the same time is cautious and adamant on you getting better faster.

  He buys you kitty themed pajamas and socks while you’re ill.

 Also brings your missed schoolwork from RAD and makes you do it when you get better.

 He thinks it’s cute that you have to really on him while you’re ill.

Asmo

  He is not coming to your room, no kisses, hugs or holding hands while you feel sick or for 2 weeks after your recovery (it’s a precaution he’s not letting any illness affect him)

  Sickness and Asmo do not mix at all, it’s bad for his skin!

  After avoiding you he does feel bad and misses you, so he bravely puts on a hazmat suit and finally comes to see you.

 He nearly freaks out, you look terrible!

 When was the last time you washed your hair? Your cheeks look red, your eyes are all watery, plus you’re so sweaty. This simply won’t do, Asmo will not allow his baby to look so bad, sick or not.

 He yanks you out of bed, puts you in a warm bath with essential oils, rose petals with some scented candles burning.

  He airs out your room and puts your favourite fresh flowers in. He believes that a gloomy room will just make you feel sicker so a bright room will make you get better faster.

  He thinks your croaky low voice is kind of sexy and he can barely contain himself when you ask him to rub Vicks on your chest after not touching you for so many days.

   He gives you a few beauty creams, just because you’re sick doesn’t mean you have to look sick.

  He feels relieved when you finally get better and makes you promise not to get sick again.

Beel & Belphie

You have two cuddly, warm teddy bears in your bed the minute you get ill.

 You basically migrate to their room and they push their beds together so you can all sleep next to each other.

   Beel and Belphie both think a cold will come and go but they’ll be by your side entirely.

  Beel cooks you soups and lots of nutritional meals while Belphie rubs your head and back while you’re sleeping.

You guys watch movies while you’re awake all cuddled up under the warmest blanket with the softest pillows.

They dote on you. Beel carries you around everywhere and Belphie tucks you into bed every 10 seconds.

  Both give you forehead kisses when they leave for RAD no matter how clammy your forehead is, they never say anything about it or make you feel gross.

  Sleep more and eat more are parroted by them.

   When you’re finally better they’re happy that you’re not sick anymore but they’re going to miss caring for you and pampering you.

Unfortunately as soon as you get better one of them or worst case scenario both of them catch your cold so now it’s your turn to pamper and swaddle them.

[etherealluminescence]

The boys, GN!MC, and the cat

Based off my previous post, about MC and their very buff and not-so-catlike-cat. I’ve been reading fushigi neko and creepy cat so if that gives you a rough idea!

Scenario - WARNING LONG

MC is new to the demon world and they have a pet cat. MC introduces the cat to the boys and it suddenly goes on two legs and flexes it’s very buff arms? How do the boys react to this bizarre scene, and how are they with the cat in general?

Lucifer

When he sees the cat jump out of your bag, he first thinks oh, great, a pet to take care of, but then he thinks what the fuck.

Did your cat just get up on two legs, and grow muscles, and a six pack? And one second, did you just say you weren’t afraid because this was your protector?

He’s one of the first to recover from the initial shock. He thinks your cat is cursed or magical or something at first, but you keep denying that, saying this is just how cats are.

He has a poker face with the cat and tries to generally avoid it, until some demon who was picking on you got thrown into a wall by your cat. He has to deal with the aftermath, and your cat just looks at him with a poker face and it’s beady eyes and meows.

He is now seriously concerned what is wrong with your cat to be able to demolish a demon. He tries to bring up that this cat is far from normal again, but you keep insisting that your cat is average, and that most cats can do this.

You bring this cat to his office one afternoon and ask him to cat sit, since you’ll be going out for a bit, and everyone else is busy. He tries to say no, but your cat covers his mouth with a paw and you leave.

He’s staring at your cat for a long time, unable to focus on his work because your cat is organising his desk and pouring itself a cup of tea.

He actually becomes fine with your cat after it plays some classic music and quietly reads a favourite book of Lucifer’s in a corner. He forgets your cat is an actual cat for a bit.

But the more you leave your cat in the care of Lucifer, the more he’s just like alright, this cat isn’t so bad. He’s still more of a dog person.

Mammon

He’s just freaked out PERIOD. He will never let himself be alone with this cat.

He avoids it like the plague, won’t go near it. Wont let you leave him alone with it.

He just is so intimidated. Especially since the cat is working out?? Baking?? Reading?? Doing your homework? He does not approach.

Leviathan

This is just like I picked up a stray cat but they ended up being a super strong alien who vowed to protect me in exchange for saving them while they were suffering!!

Levi is actually pretty fine with it, you may think he freaks out or something, but he does like cats, and he has raised giant animals and weird ones himself.

He teaches your cat how to play video games, and has him as his main player two. He wants your cat to learn about TSL, and tells him the whole lore, your cat just sits there in Levi’s room nodding and occasionally meowing.

Your cat ending up sewing an idol outfit for themselves to wear when him and Levi watch idol videos together.

Levi is really happy to have someone to listen to him, and better yet, it’s not a physical person so he’s not as nervous, he probably spends more time with your cat than you do at this point.

Satan

KITT- oh. alright. Can he uh,, pet it?

He’s just really confused because you’re calling it a cat, it has the face of a cat, ears, whiskers, and a tail, but?? Its on two feet and majorly buff.

He still wants to pet it, he knows human cats aren’t all like that, and wants to know what is up. You insist that it’s normal, but he ends up getting you to tell him the life story of your cat.

You tell him while you’re in his room with your cat, when your cat goes unbuff and starts purring, feeling that you’re safe.

Satan immediately is like,,, can I pet,, I wanna,,, so cute,,, kitty. Aaaaaaaaaa, internal freak out. So it can be insanely fluffy and cute.

Satan gets along so well with your cat, they drink coffee together in the morning, your cat knocks on his door and asks (meows) to borrow a book from him, and sits on his lap as Satan pets him.

Asmodeus

Excuse me MC what the FUCK is that. Is he seeing what everyone else is seeing?

He is VERY wary of this abomination and refuses to be near it. It really saddens you because you want them to get along.

One night he’s freaking out because he has a pimple, so your cat comes to the rescue with an SOS beauty package.

You mention it’s the same routine your cat puts on you, with the cream and the products. Asmo freaked out at first, but calmed down a bit since he really wanted the pimple gone.

The next day it is completely clear and his skin is RADIANT. He nervously approached you to ask for the products but you tell him to talk to your cat, since you only do as he says, you don’t actually know the stuff.

He ends up asking your cat, begrudgingly, and turns out your cat can go unbuff, and was happy to help.

10/10 Asmo loves your cat now. He’s so squishy and fluffy, doesn’t shed fur, and even knows about beauty routines. Your cat is now his bff.

Beelzebub

It takes him a second but he just thinks human cats are like that.

After watching everyone freak out he realises human cats aren’t like that. But you’re insisting it’s completely normal.

He believes you and your cat, so he’s rather okay with it. He’s more of a dog person but your cat is really chill.

Your cat has dinner duty one night and allowed Beel to taste test the food, and even showed Beel his secret recipes.

Beel is instantly very fond of your cat, and then your cat joins him for work outs. He mentions working out later in front of you and your cat meows and you mention he wants to join in.

Your cat and Beel are now bench pressing a few hundred together every other day. Completely forgets that not all cats are like your’s.

Belphegor

The first time they met your cat came out of the window and punched him in the face.

Belphie tried to kill you and your cat found out, and was ready to kick his ass. You had to deescalate it because your cat broke out of Beel’s grip and was ready to punch Belphie again.

Belphie was annoyed when someone punched him and then saw your fucking cat. He has decided to shut the fuck up.

Belphie is intimidated. That thing is NOT normal, so why is everyone acting like it’s an everyday thing??

It takes awhile to calm your cat down. Belphie has to apologise to both your cat and you. Sincerely.

Your cat takes your hand and walks you away from Belphie. Belphie does not want to live with it but has no choice.

Is VERY scared when you suddenly leave your cat alone with him for a little bit. Your cat stays in incredibly buff form and sits across the room staring holes into Belphie while Belphie is trying to sleep.

He will never be comfortable near your cat, and your cat is constantly in buff form around him. He is NOT a fan of mr kitty.

Diavolo

Excuse me what. He stares for a second and laughs and says what a cool cat. He’s slightly concerned though, because he feels genuinely no magical energy from the cat,, so what is up with it?

He listens to you say you just found him on the side of the road and have been raising him since. That’s very nice of you, but are you not a little concerned?

To be fair, if he met a muscular cat like your’s on the side of the road, he too, would pet it or raise it.

Is pleasantly surprised when he watches your cat help students in RAD, holding open doors, carrying textbooks, and he even waters the flowers in the front of the school.

Very delighted when you leave your cat in Barb’s care for awhile, because he gets to watch your cat from up close, and even gets to eat some of the famous cookies it bakes.

He ends up really fond of your cat, inviting your cat to dinners and asking your cat opinions on minor things. You have a proud parent moment watching the two of them interact.

Barbatos

Your cat is incredibly buff and has a six pack,, right... The stoic butler has a poker face, but he has a brain freeze for a few seconds. He’s the quickest to come back to his senses.

He has never seen anything like this before, and thinks someone must have put a spell on this cat or something, but hears you say it’s normal.

He knows human cats can’t be like that, right? What do you mean you just found him on the side of the road and he just acted like this?? Shouldn’t you have some sense of concern?

He starts to notice that your cat is quite similar to him. Your cat cooks, bakes, and even takes care of you. Just like how he takes care of Diavolo. Apart of him hates that but another part of his respects that your cat cares for you.

When you go on a trip with the brothers you leave your cat in his care, saying you’ll be gone for a week, and that you’ll call him every night.

Well, he didn’t really have to take care of the cat. The cat kept out of his arms after the two arrived in the kitchen. Barbatos was finishing off his baking, and the cat was helping him clean the kitchen equipment.

The cat ended up helping him frost the cake, while wearing a small apron from his care package, and set it aside to cool off.

Barbatos ends up being really fine with the cat, since your cat is really well mannered and helpful. It’s a little freaky at first, but it’s no big deal.

Solomon

Ah yes, and incredibly buff cat. That seems.. abnormal. Interesting, especially since there’s no magical power coming from it.

He wants to figure out what’s wrong with it, so he invites you to purgatory hall under the guise of some humans enjoying themselves and eating cookies.

You arrived with an apron and your cat got his apron on. You said your cat wants to bake the cookies together, so you brought the ingredients rather than cookies themselves.

Since he’s such a great baker, he guesses questioning your cat can wait for later. Is actually really amused to see how great of a baker your cat is.

At the end of the day, he ends up taking cooking and baking lessons from your cat, and your cat is encouraging him to do his best at cooking.

He gets along super well with your cat at the end of it. Is delighted to spend time with Satan and you reading books wnd talking about cats with your cat.

Simeon

Haha cat go buff. Simeon 100% has accidental chaotic energy. He is taken aback but then is fine.

Finds your cat to be pretty cute, and is smiling from how your cat wants to protect you and how you cat sees you as a precious child to protect.

Is 100% delighted to have your cat come to purgatory hall one day with a basket of baked goods, and let’s him in.

He doesn’t understand cat talk so your cat writes down a letter saying he baked some cookies and came for a visit, just wanting to know more about them.

Simeon shares his celestial realm stories and Lucifer stories, and your cat becomes a great tea time friend of his, your cat sharing stories of you.

Luke

Is very freaked out and is nearly like Mammon until your cat stops being buff.

He is fine if your cat isn’t buff, but gets intimidated if he’s buff.

You get asked by Luke to bake some cookies with him at Purgatory Halls, so you bring your cat and he’s wearing a small apron.

Luke things it’s really cute and is awing until your cat gets up and starts baking as well. Don’t worry, your cat has gloves.

He’s watching your cat who uses expert techniques to do it quickly yet efficiently. Maybe your cat isn’t that bad.

[kvj-novels]

Senku x fem named!reader

Rating: this chapter is A for Adults ONLY

Warnings: this fic has elements of smut and a mention of eating disorders THIS CHAPTER DOES CONTAIN SOME CONTENT WITH THESE WARNINGS - check tags - TW: mention of eating disorder.

Summary: Imogen has been awakened from petrification but she suffers from amnesia upon waking up. Senku and Taiju - her lover and childhood friend (respectively) before the petrification - must do their best to help her recall her past life.

Smut summary: soft sex, first time, no warnings but very NSFW.

Authors Note: If you choose to not read this chapter, please see the tags for a summary of missed relevant topics.

Chapter Six

Morning streamed in through the window. I rolled over to see Senku was gone. I half expected it considering he probably didn’t like to waste daylight. A note, however, was on his pillow.  I picked it up. 

“Breakfast will be soon. Wake up and get dressed, come to the village square. Take the road this time.”

-Senku

I got up and tossed on one of Senku’s tunics. My previous dress was all ripped up after the tussle with the bear. I never even remembered once we got back to the village to ask for a new dress. Senku was taller than me though, and it was summer so I felt I could get away with just his tunic coming down past my butt. I grabbed one of his rope belts and tied it around my waist.  My feet were still bandaged up and they hurt a bit this morning. I told myself I would ask Senku to look at the cuts after breakfast.  I climbed down the stairs and walked the road to the village. People were bustling about and the smell of fresh cooked eggs was wafting through the houses in the breeze. Chatter and laughter soon reached my ears as I approached the square. It was interesting to see a whole village eat breakfast together. People were sitting on blankets on the ground, at the tables and benches from last night, the steps up to the house at the top of the hill.  Taiju called out my name and waved me over. I hurried over and sat down next to him. “Here,” he said, handing me a plate of food. Eggs, ham and potatoes filled the plate.  “These look grilled.” I mused.  “They are. Senku helped make a grill last week.” Taiju grinned. “Dig in.” “Thank you.” I picked up my fork and chowed down on the food. “Where’s Senku at?” I asked after a bit.  “Oh he’s over there at the grill having fun. Everyone is almost fed, he’ll be over in a minute.” “He cooks for everyone?” “Just today.” Taiju said.  “Why today?” “Oh! I’m sorry, I forget you don’t know the traditions. Today is July 4th. In America, they celebrate their independence on this day. Senku honors the countries who are still stuck in petrification by celebrating their unique holidays. On these occasions he cooks for the whole village.” “That’s very thoughtful of him.” I smiled.  “Do you have any plans today?” Taiju asked after a while. “My only plan is to hang out with you. I have a lot of questions.” “Good! I know just the spot we can go to get away from the bustle of the village. But only after you finish your whole plate.” He said in a brotherly tone.  I laughed. “Oh you bet I will.” Senku came over with a full plate of his own and sat down at the table next to me. “Morning.” He said.  “Good morning.” I smiled. I finished off my plate.  “Damn, done already?” He chuckled. “I’ll have to scarf this down to catch up.” He then leaned over and whispered into my ear. “My shirt looks damn hot on you.”  I tried to hide my blush but failed. “Oh shut up.” I said with a giggle.  He winked and took a bite of his food.  “I’m gonna hang out with Taiju after breakfast. Get some questions answered.” “Mm, of course. Take all the time you need. I need to get some work done so I won’t be very enteraining today.” Senku said in an apologetic tone. Then he looked over at Taiju next me. “I trust you’ll take care of her today.” “Of course, Senku.” He grinned, fist in the air. “Shall we go?” He asked me. “We shall.” I leaned over and kissed Senku’s cheek real quick without even thinking. I froze afraid I must’ve done too much. He only smiled and winked at me.  “Have fun. I’ll catch up with you when I’m done with my work.”  I smiled and took Taiju’s hand which he had out for me. We walked out of the village and hiked up a small mountain to a look out with a small fire pit.  “Here we are.” Taiju announced. He sat on the edge of the cliff and beaconed me to join. When I sat next to him and looked out I realized I could see the village from here. “Damn.” I said.  He leaned back on his hands. “So, what do you remember?” He asked.  “Last night I got two memories. The first one when you introduced Senku and I. The second was at the fight. When I tried the beer. It was when we all three got together that last summer. We were at the pool and I tried a beer for the first time.” He chuckled. “That was a good day.” “Will you tell me about us? Senku says I didn’t have a family...that I grew up with you.” His expression fell flat a bit. “You had a family. But they made some pretty bad choices and went to jail. Next to Senku, you were my best friend. So I begged my dad to adopt you and I didn’t stop until he agreed.” “How old was I?” “You were 5 when your parents went to jail and 7 when the papers finally went through.” “Really? How come Senku and I never met until high school?” “That would be dad's fault...he really wanted you to...be a girl. As he put it. He thought that if you hung out with Senku you’d end up like him and he didn’t think science was a good career for a girl.” “But...Senku said I was studying computer science.”  “You did. So, the way it went down was like this. From 8-11 dad enrolled you in every type of after school activity until you found something you liked that he approved of. You guys settled on dance and put you in ballet. You hated every single minute of it.” We both laughed.  “I can imagine I did. Dancing doesn’t even interest me now.” “Yeah dad wasn’t too happy about that. You came to me one day and told me that whole you had been looking up computer science. You said you did this often when you should’ve been sleeping. Then you asked me what kind of science Senku did. To be honest, you really looked up to him. The boy you could never meet.” “Why could it never happen?” “Dad went to extreme lengths to make sure you never hung out with Senku. You couldn’t stop talking about computers and science and he knew if you hung out with Senku it would only get worse—in his eyes.” I frowned.  “Now please, don’t hate him. Even back then you never hated dad for putting you through all that. You desperately wanted to make him proud and you bent over backwards for years to do that. But from 11-15 you really started to decline. Ballet forced you to eat less, and you never had any energy. You started to get sick. I had an argument with dad because he was completely blind to it. Still he didn’t take you out because he was convinced that you liked it. That’s when I talked with you and told you that you needed to tell dad that you hated it.” He paused and sighed. “Things didn’t go extremely well. You and dad argued and then you dropped out of ballet on your own by faking dad’s signature. When you came home from school that day you said that high school was just around the corner and there was a computer science course you wanted to take at the high school me and Senku were enrolling in. You and dad came to an agreement that if you got straight A’s your first year, he would consider allowing you to do it. And you surpassed that. You got straight A’s, you made top of your class, and you won the science fair.” “Against Senku?” “No. Unfortunately not. Senku didn’t join the science fair the first year.” “Aw...damn.” I chuckled. “So what happened at the end of the year?” “Dad said that if you could keep that up for one more year, he’d let you graduate and pay your tuition for any college you wanted. But...that’s when things went wrong.” “How so?” “You were still struggling with eating. And on top of that you were working overtime to prove this to dad. You ended up in the hospital after Christmas.” “What for...” I was scared of the answer.  “Anorexia. You were barely 100 pounds. I was so scared for you.” He sat up and crossed his legs under him. “I remember I sat down with you and had a heart to heart. You told me that the girls at ballet bullied you from eating and the pressure to look a certain way remained even after you left. You started to get depressed because you immediately assumed that dad wouldn’t let you finish because you were in the hospital. So I helped you.” “Oh? How?” “I brought in your homework every night and I text Senku for any help. I helped you make your projects and I even stood in for you at the second science fair. To which of course, Senku won.” He laughed. “But my only condition for you was gain weight and eat your food. By March you gained 50 pounds and was no longer considered underweight. Dad let you finish out the school at home under a watchful eye when you ate and when your report came back as straight A’s, dad made good on his promise.” “And that’s when I got to meet Senku?” “Mhmm. Things were looking up for you and I know you never forgot about him. I never expected things to turn out the way it did for you two but I’m happy it did.” Said, putting a hand on my shoulder. “Senku is an amazing man. You guys were meant for each other. My only regret is not introducing you sooner to be honest.” I smiled. “Thank you, Taiju. You were there for me during some pretty dark times and if I never got a chance to say it back then; thank you. I hope I can remember the bond we shared and I hope we can continue to be close.” He pulled me into his side, enveloping me with his arms. “If there’s anything you need, please keep coming to your big brother for help.” “I will.” I said, hugging him back. “Can you tell me more? What did you and I do for fun?” He chuckled and laid down on the cool rock, taking me down with him. I rested my head on his chest. “Man you were wild for a while. Despite working so hard in school you occasionally woke me up to sneak out of the house and go to a party or a club.” “Did I really??”  “Ohhh yeah,” he laughed. “That memory you said you got, at pool with me and Senku? Yeah that wasn’t your first time trying beer.”  “What? It wasn’t?” “Nope. That was your first time trying a beer and rum combo. You weren’t an alcoholic but you enjoyed a drink occasionally - you were just very adventurous with it.” I smiled. “Did Senku ever talk to you about me?” “Oh all the time.” Taiju said.  “What would he say?” “I remember his top comment about you was, ‘she’s amazing and smart and I never thought I’d be this lucky.’” “Pfffft you’re lying. That doesn’t sound like Senku.” He laughed. “Damn it, you caught me.”  “Hey!” I Smacked his chest. “You cheek!” He belly laughed. “I’m sorry, I had to at least see if you’d believe it. But for real, Senku couldn’t shut up about you. He honestly was amazed with your smarts. He was impressed by all your accomplishments. He tried to keep with you, you know.” “How so?” “When we were young. He saw you always watching or asking to hang out. And then whenever you had a question or a theory I’d remember it and ask him and he’d give me the best advice to give you so you could work it out on your own. Often he would text me late at night to ask if you had figured it out.” “Really?” He shook his head. “Really. You may have looked up to him a lot, but he also was very keen on watching you grow.”  “I wish I could remember how it felt...” I mumbled.  “How what felt?” “Falling in love for the first time.” He squeezed my shoulder and kissed the top of my head. “I’m sorry. I wish I could help.” “Tell me more. Anything that comes to your mind.” “Hmm...I think my favorite thing we did when we were younger was you would sneak into my room and we made a fort and played pretend in space. You pretended to be a valiant hero and I was an alien.” He chuckled. “That’s a fun memory.” I closed my eyes and listened to him talk. “I do have to confess, I may have read your journal after you enrolled in high school. I wanted to know if you wrote anything about Senku so I could have a better idea.” “Did I?” “One entry. It was the newest one.” “What did it say?” “I honestly can’t remember fully. I remember the sentence, ‘Senku will be there, I can’t wait to see him. I wonder if he’ll think I’m weird.’ I went to school for the next week and did nothing but pick his brain about his thoughts for you.” “He probably caught on quick.” “Nah, Senku’s an idiot with things like that. He didn’t catch on in the slightest.” I laughed. “Thank you for telling me all this. I hope I get these memories back soon.”

“Me too.” He smiled.

********

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[goldkirk]

how I do just enough to take care of myself that I don’t totally spiral on really empty-well days

I’ve gotten 3-5 hours of sleep max for the past three days so to say that I’m not at the top of my game is an understatement. But I’m finally out of my total overwhelm and distress just enough to haul myself around today determined to do good things for my me and determined to work on therapy stuff that DOESN’T drain me or stress me out.

And to be serious about drinking water and eating at least twice and do some hygiene stuff. The more flat and hiding-downward and confused and wispy-ghost-that-can’t-hold-thoughts I am, the more I can’t do a lot of the really important routines for eating and caring for my body and getting concrete hands-on feels-satisfying-to-accomplish-it tasks that are the most critical backbone component of Katie Being a Functioning Human Who Feels As Minimally Lousy Physically As Possible (and its sequel, When Katie Has the Good Luck to Manage Several Days in a Row of Consistent Medication Times and All Basic Daily “Living Human Body”Routine Things, She Miraculously Will Actually Have More Capacity for Like, Everything). I also had an insurance issue getting a really important daily drug for several days so that. Really wasn’t a help.

THINGS ARE GOING TO BE BETTER FOR MY BODY TODAY BECAUSE I AM GOING TO GO AS SLOW AS I NEED TO BUT MAKE IT HAPPEN. No more shame. No shame and overwhelm paralysis. I only have to do three main things, and I am NOT allowed to beat myself up over it no matter if it takes me till 5 PM just to put shower and put on clean clothes. I’m gonna do it and I’m writing how I’ve learned to plan a day like this in case it can help any of you. 💛

Step 1: try to get in your body as much as possible—if you’ve got any pain or any discomfort or anything that really is making your experience of having a physical body way worse, try to drop any other plans and take care of ONE thing for that first. In my case, this morning I woke up feeling extra run down and empty and sore, and I figured out I needed food and also hadn’t drunk nearly enough water yesterday. I’m working on fixing that now. It’s taking me an hour to eat oatmeal, but it’s happening because I’m taking care of the me that shouldn’t need to be suffering this way and DEFINITELY doesn’t deserve to have me make it worse because I don’t want to do anything.

Step 2: think of a couple things that make you feel better when you do them OR bleed out feelings a bit without being too intense or hard for you to do when already low. For me, that’s petting Aoife, maybe doing a little bit of extra skincare or makeup if I’m up for it later, playing Cozy Grove if my eyes aren’t too tired, and (since I got given the homework to try it this week) trying to start doing art therapy but from literally the “what you’d have a toddler do” level instead of starting with trauma exercises or thinking/focused art things. IMPORTANT: if that art attempt starts feeling at any point like it’s making my mood bad or prompting me to get really sleepy/zoned out because my brain isn’t up for it, I’ll stop right away. I’m learning the lesson that it’s NOT worth it to push through chronic illness or mental illness symptoms that are your “pressure valve” indicators.

(I ignored my body on that issue for so long that this summer it went “FUCK’S SAKE WILL YOU LISTEN TO THIS THEN????” and escalated to literally forcing me to pass out asleep at any time of day with no more than two minutes of warning if I go too far past my body’s signals to please sit for a while or please stop trying CBT techniques or whatever. Don’t be like me. 😅)

Step 3: do not put those on to do list for yourself.

Step 4: think of the minimum body things you need to do to make your body actually feel better abd more human again—for me, that’s washing my face and putting the creams on it, washing my hair since it’s been a few days, putting on Real Shoes that lace, eating and drinking several things, and taking my medications as early as possible.

Step 5: do not those on your to do list either.

Step 6: pick THREE things. ONLY three things, or two if three is too much. The three things that you think will help you feel the most better if you do them before anything else. For me, today, that’s eating one thing, washing body/hair so I feel not gross, and putting on big-girl clothes that make me feel like I’m actually dressed for a real day.

Step 7: NOW you have your to do list. Go through those as slowly as you need to, and if/when you finish them, then you can pick two or three more things that you think would be the next nicest options for you, and then you can attempt to do those too. And once you’ve done a few things that are simple and concrete like this, it gets easier because your brain starts getting some nice dopamine rewards from seeing things visibly accomplished AND your body feels more comfortable and has more energy to do things.

I love you. You can do this. We’re all gonna be all right, believe me. Seeing as none of the trauma managed to kill us and we survived, apparently we’ve actually got plenty of time to improve and recover. We already survived! We did that part! We got the damage and now it’s about rehabbing our injuries. The story doesn’t stop right there, with us stuck in tangles of fog and dysfunction! Our bodies want to heal already, and we’re helping them when we can. Dysfunction is not what our default state is going to be stuck in forever. The story ends with us actually okay one day. 💛

[theonlygamergost]

French homework and a Dream - fd!au. ( part 1 / 2)

This fanfiction is based on the Family Dynamic au made by @antarctic-bay ctic-bay if you would like to know more, go check them out!!!

Also please bear in mind that the things written in this might not be canon!

This fic was corrected by the lovely @im-default

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Techno and Dream did the fatal mistake of choosing French over Spanish and now they have to suffer the consequences together

next part --->

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Enjoy~

Lunch break was sacred for Techno, it was that magic moment where he sat at a table alone, in the corner of the cafeteria with a book of his choice to read and block out the chaos of the fellow students. You know what they say: if you can't find peace, create your peace.

With lo-fi music or classical piano in his ears, he would peacefully eat his lunch, recharging his social energy (already consumed in the first half of the day) by not talking nor seeking company. Even though, from time to time, he would get some visitors:

One of his brothers could drop by if they needed to talk to him or they were also already feeling exhausted, Skeppy would also sit with him and try to initiate conversations, in vain since Techno ends up ignoring him unless he needed something important.

All in all, Techno didn’t allow anyone to disturb or interrupt his moment of peace, neither he liked sharing his book or music with anyone…

Well, anyone apart from Dream.

In between the rivalry for the smartest kid and best (nerd) Minecraft pvp-er, the two had started frequenting now and then, maybe studying at the library together or grabbing a bite after school before parting ways, all in all, they found to have a similar love for quiet company and taste in music.

So, to see Dream sit next to Techno, steal one of his earbuds, and tug the book a little closer for him to read as well wasn’t rare, but a treat to see.

“TALK TO ME TECHNO!!!” Skeppy had been trying to get his friend’s eyes off of the book for about five minutes or so, just to get completely denied by an unbothered and concentrated face. “Techno pleaseee!!!! I need attention!” his head fell on the table, “...I can tell” he finally replied while turning the page.

Skeppy groaned and went on bothering him for another five minutes.

Techno sighed, “Can’t you go bother someone else?” Skeppy was about to complain again, but a familiar laugh made the both of them stop and look at the direction it came from, “You’re so needy Skeppy”.

The boy in the green hoodie placed his tray next to Techno’s, leaving his backpack on the seat next to him, “YEAH! And this stupid pig isn’t giving me any attention!!!” after a second of silence they all giggled at Techno being addressed as “Pig”, something that only Skeppy could get away with. Not even Dream could call him that without either a complaint or a casual roast coming from the other teen as a consequence.

“Have you studied for tomorrow’s French test?” He took a bite of… whatever the cafeteria had made that day, he couldn’t really tell since it was so… revolting-looking, but it didn’t taste that bad and Dream was pretty hungry. Skipping breakfast was a habit of his so whatever he could eat at lunch was fine by him, it just needed to fill him up until the end of the day.

“Nah… I can’t remember some of the verbs, let alone when and how to use them” he replied before sipping on some water, “Same… some words are unpronounceable too… “ Dream and Techno both made the grave mistake of choosing French over Spanish as a second language, Techno made a very bad first impression with the teacher and Dream overslept three lessons in a month, let’s say that if they didn’t do good on this test… they could kiss goodbye a good French overall vote at the end of the year.

Skeppy exploded in a loud laugh, banging one of his fists on the table meanwhile holding his stomach, “Sucks to be you!” they sighed in defeat, Skeppy got convinced into choosing Spanish by a friend so he couldn’t relate to their problems since legends told that the Spanish teacher was a very nice person.

“I’ll leave you two to your nerdy problems, later losers!” Dream told him goodbye meanwhile Techno simply waved.

The blonde boy stretched his arms and grabbed both his phone and diary out of the backpack, flipping through it he nudged the other boy lightly, “We only have French for tomorrow… wanna study together?” Techno hummed a reply as the blondie took one of his earbuds, Techno reacted with a question: “Want to study at the library or..?” Dream’s head tilted, “Or what? We don’t have another place to study” Techno furrowed his brows for a second, “Well… no, you’re right”.

The reply made Dream curious, but he limited himself to finishing his meal in silence, enjoying the quiet company until the bell rang.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“It’s already six pm?! We haven’t even finished memorizing this stuff!” Dream groaned in frustration while Techno just dropped his head on the book in front of him, they had been studying for two hours interrupted only by a bathroom break, and they weren’t even half-way done with their homework.

“This will be the only low grade on my paper this year…” the low murmur was muffled by the fact that Techno’s head was still slumped on the books, “Oh come on…”, Dream rubbed out the tiredness from his eyes, “I know that I won’t get anything done once I get back home, my ADHD goes crazy when I’m studying French… it knows I don’t want to study it so it makes me think about everything but that!”, the blonde boy chuckled, “I can never focus when It’s French too…”

Well, that was a slump, both of them knew that going part-ways wasn’t going to work… If they wanted a decent grade they had to have a study partner.

So Techno took a shot in the dark.

“Ok listen, I’ve got a plan:  come sleep over at my place, my desk it’s a bit messy but if I throw everything on the ground we’ll fit, you can’t eat dinner with us because Phil already cooked it and it’s not enough for five people, it’s not enough- but we can go eat somewhere”.

Dream froze in genuine shock: he had never gone to the Pandel house, nor he had ever been invited by Techno anywhere really, he was usually the one that asked him to grab a bite together, Techno only ever asked him to study, and that was already pretty rare. So getting such an out-of-nowhere invitation to eat together AND sleep at his house was… very surprising.

“Uhh… sure, can I borrow a shirt to sleep in?” Techno nodded, “Well then…  should we go eat now so that we have more time to study later?” Techno nodded again and they started packing up their stuff, grabbing books and pencils that scattered on the table while studying.

“McDonald’s?” Dream proposed, “McDonald’s” Techno replied.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Meanwhile, they were crunching on some fries, Techno texted the Pandel chat about Dream sleeping over, Phil agreed almost instantly, telling Techno where he could get some blankets and an additional pillow, the problems were Wilbur and Tommy that didn’t like the idea of having Dream in their house, (because they had a Minecraft server where they and Dream had a bit of a… “difference” of opinions…) but Techno told them to cry about it and closed the chat, reassuring the boy in the green hoodie that he could spend the night with him.

On their way home, Techno had noticed by reading the notifications that the Berry brothers had proposed a last-minute movie night, to which the other Pandel’s agreed, already counting Techno off, so it wasn’t a surprise that they met Wilbur and Tommy leaving when they arrived.

“I’m glad we are leaving, two tryhards together must be a revolting sight” Wilbur adjusted his coat as Tommy tied his laces, “I’m glad you guys are leaving too, we really need to study and my desk is a bit small, we can use the kitchen until you come back” Dream stifled a giggle, the passive-aggressive energy the Pandel had when speaking to each other was very entertaining, Techno turned to him and pointed at the clothes hanger behind the door, “Put your jacket there, oh and don’t forget to take your shoes off, I’ll get you a pair of slippers, Eret’s one should fit you”

He opened the closet to almost disappear in it, “Bye big D! Have fun with TechnoNerd!” Dream cringed at Tommy’s goodbye while Wilbur snickered at it, “Bye… and please don’t call me that ever again”

The front door closed as Techno dropped a pair of dark blue slippers in front of him, he thanked him, grabbed his backpack and followed the pink-haired boy while looking around:

the living room and the kitchen were in the same room, there was also no proper table, not that there was room for it, so he guessed that they ate on the kitchen counter.

There were four doors in the room, the first one on the left before the kitchen, a pig sticker gave Techno’s room away, on the other side of it, next to the couch, there was a door with a big sign spelling “NO BITCHES ALLOWED” with an evil smile scribbled next to it, he guessed that was Tommy’s room.

Not too far away from Tommy’s room, there was another door, but this time nothing was on it, and the fourth door was to the right of that blank door aka on the opposite side of the front door. He guessed one was a room and one was the bathroom, there was a hole next to the fourth door though…

Techno sat on one of the stools and opened his backpack, “As I’ve said, we can stay here until the others come back, if you need the bathroom it’s this one” He pointed at the door directly behind him, door number three… but then…

“Why is there a hole next to that door” Dream pointed at the forth door, Techno smiled briefly, “Uhhh… It’s a long and secret story, but to give you an idea that is Will’s room” He blinked a couple of times to let the information sink in, Techno snapped him out of it by waiving his pen in front of his eyes.

“C’mon nerd, we have work to do.” To which Dream apologized and sat next to him, taking a deep breath before opening the french textbook.

[lmanberg]

just some observations... watching t being himself on his alt and it’s so clear he’s really cynical and pessimistic, unlike how people perceive him. he’s said struggles to give advice (such as when asked how to start streaming, he says give up, that it’s stressful, and although he’s partially joking, you can tell he means it too). he often thinks the worst in situations too. he’s really critical of himself a lot and puts so much stress on himself, like he mentioned the lore today was really stressful and that he should’ve planned more. he then criticised his appearance, saying he looked a mess - something he does a concerning amount. he is kinda insecure about it - he doesn’t use full cam on stream because he hates how he looks, he’s said he’s most insecure of his legs, often hiding his arms/legs with long sleeves/hoodies etc. and he’s mentioned he hated trampolining/swimming partially because it showed off his body so much. he also has a really unhealthy relationship with food - he often forgets to eat, and doesn’t really eat anything heavy. then he eats too much at once and feels sick and has mentioned wanting to throw up afterwards several times as well as calling himself fat a lot :( i think he’s not too good at self-care, and that’s why he ends up doing things mindlessly (like socks in the shower). it also is worrying that his dreams sound so damn horrific. i guess that’s the flaw of having an overactive imagination, but dude, i hope he’s able to sleep well. he mentioned yesterday that sometimes he wakes up still in the dream, and frantically starts packing things in his room to deal with the dream before realising it’s not real. he also sleeps in the shower D: so dangerous. he needs to take care of himself, actually.

and the way he said he doesn’t really get motivated easily, but when he see how much work tmmy puts in, and is asked what he’s up to, he ends up working on things too. it’s nice to see that his friends are something that help motivate him, but it also is kinda worrying. i wonder if he would truly be okay on his own. you can kinda tell he just wants to chill with his friends and follows/values their lead and advice, and is quite dependant and reliant on them to being happy, and doesn’t really do well alone. which, paired with how he doesn’t actively say his feelings, could mean that he suffers alone sometimes and doesn’t talk about what’s bothering him in the moment :( especially to not worry others. such a damn t thing to do.

the way he asks a lot where people are to play with but doesn’t actively seek people out to hang with, he used to, but you can tell he doesn’t wanna bother people (like how he doesn’t call r on stream anymore). if he prepared more streams/lobbies, i think he would enjoy it more. he’s obviously an introvert but likes company in small groups. he’s much happier and energetic with people, and so these quiet hours show off this other side we don’t see often. he mentioned recently that the past few weeks have been especially stressful - and i have a feeling part of it is that he doesn’t really have people to regularly stream with anymore, which could’ve lowered his enthusiasm for streams. tmmy barely streams, r is busy doing homework, and others don’t log in as much at the times he’s live. so it’s not surprising the alt has become a place where he doesn’t have to be the t we expect, but can vibe on his own without being asked if he’s sad when he’s just low energy. and it explains why he’s moving his main to be more planned content, rather than burning out by streaming unplanned content everyday. the only concern with the alt is that he could get lost in it. tmmy told him after his first (8hr) stream to not fall into overstreaming on there, as that wasn’t why tmmy recommended creating an alt (i think tmmy saw it as something that can feel more freeing). t is still streaming a very long time though, and i wonder if this is how t spent his days before? or by streaming on his alt it deters him from hanging with others (like being on r’s stream, since r won’t want to bother him, while he’s live, and t thinks r won’t want him there - he said that earlier this stream)? it’s very chill and therapeutic though :D

t said that he doesn’t really feel like he deserves us. he said he hasn’t done anything noteworthy to be proud of, like charity work or something, only proud of his server work. i think he views his success as something that came about from luck, and he compares it a lot to his friends. he clearly recognises how essential tmmy was to it, in that tmmy told him not to quit, and brought him along as he blew up. but i wish he knew that he was valued for actually being an interesting cc on his own, and not just see himself as a fleeting person that no one will care about in the future. however, i hope his ambition and drive to create will allow him to realise he is worthy in the future when he gives something meaning like his server :) he’s so real, too. when asked how to network, he said he didn’t like the phrase, but just liked making friends. it’s not surprising that everyone adores him when he’s so damn genuine, just looking solely for friends :’)

i hope you enjoyed my appreciation of t as a person!! ps can i be 🧩 anon?

Tubbo honestly deserves the world. You’re super right when you say that he relies on his friends for motivation, and I have a big feeling that if he ever was to live with someone else he would rely on them a lot for keeping him on a schedule for sleeping/eating/drinking. It’s a common habit, but very unhealthy in the long run. I do really hope he finds a way to eat/sleep/drink regularly, I myself struggle with it just because I don’t get hungry or thirsty or any of that. My methods is to keep water and food near me to eat/drink when I’m bored. He kinda does that with his parents giving him food, so that’s good. I think when he grows up and has a more strict schedule with streaming or an actual job on the side that he’ll get better with it, but he has to learn to rely on himself rather than his friends. Getting help from friends is fine, but overly relying can be dangerous.

[lil-pink-coupe]

Things I wish I had been told/asked by adults as a multiply-neurodivergent kid/teen*:

I can see you really enjoy/love xyz...what is it that you like about it?

In (x number of days) we will be going to (insert new place/experience involving me here)...here is what will be happening, and when, and how, and why. Do you have any questions about any of this? What do you need in order for this to be easier for you?

If it bothers you, it bothers you. I believe you when you say something is frightening, painful or uncomfortable.

You don’t have to try (insert new food here) if you really don’t want to- only when you’re ready. In the meantime, there’s plenty of your safe foods for you to eat.

It is not your fault that you got sick-not even if you ate too many sweets because you enjoy the gustatory input/you have a hard time identifying when you’re full, or you didn’t wear your coat outside because you have difficulty registering temperature changes/don’t like the way certain clothes feel. We (your parents/caregivers) will help you feel better and love you through this.

It’s okay to cry/feel sad/scared/angry. Crying/being outwardly upset lets me know something is wrong, so I can help you.

I’m really glad you felt safe enough to tell me that (xyz person) makes you feel sad, mad, or uncomfortable. It’s not okay that they make you feel that way, and you didn’t do anything to deserve it. I’ll make sure this doesn’t happen again.

If you’re hungry, eat.

You are allowed to say no.

You don’t have to be hugged/kissed/tickled/noogied/playfully punched in the shoulder by relatives (or anyone) if you don’t want to be, and it’s okay to say so.

It’s okay to tell (xyz relative) that you don’t like to be teased.

Would it help if we set up a safe sensory area/a punching bag in the garage for you to make use of when you’re overloaded/melting down, so you don’t have to self-harm?

What do you need/what would make this easier/how can I help? (I know I listed a version of this earlier, but I feel like this question and it’s variants really can’t be asked enough)

It isn’t/wasn’t your fault.

I know that all behavior is communication.

I know that meltdowns/sensory overloads are not tantrums or things you do “at” me.

I’m really glad you have a comfort item/stim toy that helps you feel safe and calm. Nobody is allowed to take it from you, or change it in any way, and you don’t have to share it if you don’t want to.

I’m so sorry you misplaced your comfort item/stim toy-that must be so hard, and it’s okay to be upset. I’ll help you look for it.

No one will think badly of you if decide to do/not do xyz

I’m so glad I got to spend time/talk with you today.

This is a grownup problem-you can’t change or fix it, and we won’t drag you into the middle of it. Just enjoy being a kid.

Your interests are NOT bad/inappropriate/cringy/weird/childish/boring etc

The concept of “age appropriate/age-inappropriate” is complete bullish!t.

If there’s something I’m doing/saying that’s upsetting you, I really want to know about it so I can make changes.

Just as a heads-up, I’m about to run the vacuum cleaner/crush this soda can/run the garbage disposal, etc. (as a courtesy so someone w/ sensory issues can cover their ears/put headphones on)

I saw (something related to hyperfixation/interests) today and thought of you!

I love you unconditionally-you are irreplaceable.

Thank you for being patient/flexible.

I found a backup(s) of your favorite book/plushie/stim toy/comfort item, just in case!

I know you love your gourd/pumpkin with a cute face painted on it that we got at the grocery store last Halloween-it *is* awfully cute! But sweetie, it’s been a month, and it’s getting too yucky to stay in the house. Why don’t we put it outside where you can still visit it whenever you want?

You are NOT spoiled/immature/self-indulgent/overly sensitive/difficult, and anyone who says that you are is wrong.

You can read a book in bed or do some other quiet activity if you have trouble falling asleep right away.

You can tell me the truth, I won’t be mad.

I know you don’t chew on pencil erasers/plastic toys/backpack straps/hoodie strings/shirt collars to be gross, or because you’re a “baby”- you need a specific kind of sensory input. Let’s find you some chewelry that you like!

Aw, those are some cute stuffed animals you brought home from the flea market/Disney Store/bookstore! What are their names?

If a certain type of therapy makes you feel unsafe or like you’ll never be good enough, you don’t have to go anymore.

I’m sorry/I was wrong/I made a mistake/I messed up...how can I make things better?

You don’t have to wear “fancy” clothes if they itch/scratch/scrape/poke/tickle/bind...dress in a way that makes you feel comfortable.

I am interested in you.

I am always here for you.

I’m on your side.

I want to hear what you have to say.

Your wants and needs matter.

You are allowed to exist and take up space.

You are not “too much.”

Whatever the problem is, we’ll find a way to solve it (to be fair, I *did* get told this when I was a kid, just not as often as I needed to)

You don’t need to suffer just so everyone else can be happy/comfortable...you matter too.

Go ahead and infodump to me!

You are allowed to stim.

You are allowed to like things.

You are SO much more important to me than any material possession.

I’ll put my phone/device away so I can give you my undivided attention.

You can draw during class if you need to-I love seeing your little cartoons in the margins of the worksheets you turn in!

It’s okay to fail and make mistakes-there are some things you just can’t get right the first time.

If you are tired, go ahead and take a nap.

Take some time to relax/have a snack/sleep before telling me about your day/getting started on your homework.

How smart you are/how hard you work/how good you are at learning/your worth as a human being is not determined by what grades you make in school.

...and I think that pretty much covers it! Please feel free to reblog with your own! 😃

*= I intentionally titled this “things *I* wish I’d been told” and invited others to add on b/c I know everyone’s experiences are different, and the last thing I want to do is presume to speak for everyone-although if it still comes off like I am, I do apologize.

[quinntheebrain]

Two Wrongs pt. 2

Hi! After 10 long years I finally finished the second part. I was little scared to post because I don’t know how much you all will like it (regardless of how much I do). But I hope you enjoy. *goes into hiding*

Warnings: 18+, porn with a plot????????? 

Word count: 9,458 (a little longer than I expected)

It would’ve been wise to listen to your conscience, but you ignored it for the sake of preserving your fantasy. Instead of making the smart decision to leave the Aizawa’s residence without looking back, you spent the weekend playing house with Shouta and his children. For a few moments, they all felt like they belonged to you: the man, the kids, the house. Unfortunately, that moment passed. In an instant, everything in your grasp was ripped away, leaving you with nothing more than obsessive, unrequited, thoughts. 

When Mrs. Aizawa waltzed through the door with a smile on her face, still on a high from the weekend she had, the reality of your situation came crashing down on you. You allowed yourself to play into pleasure and sleep with a married man. A man whose wife had been kind enough to employ you and pay you more than required for your services. A part of you felt filthy for betraying her trust the way you did but the other side of you couldn’t let go of your infatuation with this man. Despite everything, you still wanted him but you knew her unexpected return only meant the worst. 

Satoshi and Eri ran to their mother, trapping her in a hug that said how much they missed her presence. They spent the whole weekend awaiting her return. No matter what you tried, they just couldn’t get their mother off their mind.

You were just a placeholder to them, someone to just barely keep them occupied until she returned. You could never hold a candle to her. You would never replace her. 

Shouta, on the other hand, remained in his seat, continuing to eat his meal. Truly a master of the art of stoicism, he didn’t seem the slightest bit affected by her presence. His eyes met yours for a brief moment and even then you couldn’t tell what was running through his mind. You wondered if he shared the same sentiments as his children. Were you just a placeholder in his eyes as well or did he mean the things he said to you?

“Dinner smells great.” She flashed a bright smile as she skipped past you hand in hand with her children who were practically dragging her to the dining room table. “I’m starving.”

So were you. That’s why you prepared a meal suitable for four people. A meal you planned to eat with Shouta and his children. You wanted to feel like a family. Even if the children were completely oblivious to the implications of this dinner, you’d know it was much more than a housekeeper sharing a meal with her employers. That dinner would’ve been the start of your own familial bond. 

But, she came back. 

Of course. 

Of fucking course she came back. 

Now, you could only watch from the kitchen as she enjoyed a meal meant for you. With the man meant for you. In the house meant for you. With the family you wished was yours. 

Tears fell from your eyes, creating ripples in the sudsy dish water as you looked at how they interacted with each other. She was their mother. Even though you did it all: the cooking and cleaning, helping them with homework and preparing them for bed, making lunches and picking them up from school. She was the one who made their faces light up. She was the one who made them happy. 

How could you be so foolish to think one weekend would automatically change the way they viewed you? Better yet, change anything at all? You took your anger out on the dishes, scrubbing the pans so hard that water splashed back at you. 

“Shit.” You whispered as a pot slipped from your hand and hit the ground. The sound of metal crashing to the floor caught the attention of everyone in the dining room causing them to become silent. They tried peeking into the kitchen to see what happened, but to their surprise, you weren’t there. Your feet carried you up the stairs and away from the kitchen that made you feel like nothing more than a maid. The sound of your quick paced steps made Aizawa excuse himself from dinner to run after you. 

Closing the guest room door behind you, you prayed for a few moments to collect your thoughts. Seeing them together would have never bothered you before this past weekend, but once you let him inside of you things changed. You had gotten a taste of what it’s like to be his and you didn’t want to go on without it. You wanted to always enjoy the feeling of being seen, being admired by Shouta. When you closed your eyes and thought about the moment you two shared, you could practically feel his hands roaming your body. You could feel his breath on your neck, his sweat dripping onto your skin. How would you go on without that feeling? The short answer was, you’d have to. 

You said you’d be there for Shouta but that didn’t mean you’d wait around while he attempted to fix things with his wife. Twice now, the thought of quitting this job crossed your mind but your attraction to Shouta made you stay. Not the money, or the hours which were the things that originally made you take the job. It was him. You suffered day in and day out for the sake of seeing that face and hearing his voice for a few brief moments. There was no way you could walk in this house everyday without feeling resentment toward his wife. She had the luxury of being with the man you dreamed of yet she still chose to cheat and you hated her for that. So, as long as she was here, you couldn’t be. 

Soft knocks at the door forced you to stand your feet, gathering the few items you left sitting in the guest room over the weekend. Shouta softly pushed the door open to find you with your bags thrown over your shoulder. 

“Listen, I need you to believe me when I say I didn’t think she’d come home. I mean that night I sent her screenshots of the transactions, I sent her proof, I told her I knew she was cheating and I wanted nothing more to do with her.” His words came out fast once he realized you were ready to leave. At the very least, he wanted you to hear him out. 

“Did you really think it would be that simple? That a few text messages would be enough?” You laughed harshly. “Her children are here, her life is here. Of course she’d come home.” You were speaking to both yourself and Shouta. He told you she wouldn’t return because he believed it to be true and you chose to believe Shouta simply because it allowed you to remain in his arms for a few nights longer. “God, what was I thinking? I’m so stupid.” 

“No. You’re not stupid.” Shouta stepped closer to you, wrapping his hands around your own. “You didn’t do anything wrong. We’re adults and I really enjoyed what we did.”

“Didn’t do anything wrong?” You scoffed. “I slept with a married man. Regardless of your situation, regardless of her cheating, I made a conscious decision to sleep with you knowing-.”

“You did what?” You lost all feelings in your legs as you locked eyes with Mrs. Aizawa, who ran after you and Shouta solely to make sure you were okay. “Shouta you slept with this woman? In our house? How could you?” Her lips quivered. The grave expression on her face instantly made you feel terrible. 

“Please, don’t play innocent. You started this.” He released his grip on your hands to turn and face his wife. “You’ve been fucking whoever for months now. Did you think I was an idiot? That I wouldn’t notice the late nights and the lingering smell of cologne? You’d run to the bathroom, wash his scent off of you then lay next to me like nothing happened for months.” 

“I didn’t think you cared. You were so distracted by her, shit!” Mrs. Aizawa pointed at you, fingers shaking from anger. “I noticed how you looked at her during the interview, but I let go because I knew she was perfect for the job. Then I saw how you interacted when you had conversations, how you looked at her, how your eyes lit up when she walked into the room and how you’d sulk when she left for the night. But, Eri was feeling so much better so once again, I let it go.” Slapping her hand against her face, she let out a heavy sigh. “But I could only take so much of that, Shouta. Months of feeling unwanted and unattractive. Even when you made love to me I knew you were thinking about her. So I found someone who was attracted to me and only me.” Mrs. Aizawa laughed while shaking her head. “If you would’ve confronted me, showed me some fucking passion or something I would’ve stopped that moment, but you didn’t say a word. I made it obvious on purpose. I wanted to know you still cared.” She cried. 

“You sound crazy. I mean honestly, do you hear yourself? Do I think she’s attractive? Of course, but that’s all it was. You let your insecurities get the best of you. Instead of talking to me about it, you decided to cheat.” Shouta talked through his teeth. He didn’t want to yell and alarm the children. 

“You cheated, too!” Mrs. Aizawa semi screamed, her voice cracking with every word. “Two wrongs don’t make a right, Shouta.” She paused, shutting the door all the way. Stepping past Shouta, Mrs. Aizawa stood in front of you. “And you, after all we’ve done for you I figured you’d show a little gratitude, but you behaved like a low class slut. I will be sure to tell my friends. You will never work again.”

You couldn’t speak if you wanted to; your throat dry and mind racing as a reaction to confrontation. All you wanted to do was cry but you wouldn’t give her the satisfaction of seeing you like that. Cowardice, you had the balls to sleep with her husband but not enough to address her like a woman. 

“Leave her out of this.” Shouta spoke up for you. Grabbing his wife’s arm, he turned her around to face him. “I know what I did but we could’ve avoided all this if you had spoken up.” His voice was stern. “We could’ve easily replaced her, but splitting up our family.” He paused, exhaling to calm himself down. “Splitting up our family is hard. That’s why I didn’t say anything. Not because I didn’t care but because I was scared of losing you, losing the kids. I’m still scared of losing you.” Shouta admitted. This family is something they built together. 7 years of marriage down the drain over miscommunication is something he couldn’t fathom. 

It was crazy to see how fast Shouta flipped his narrative, but what hurt more than anything was watching him wrap his hands around her own like he had done to you less than two minutes ago. The only difference was the expression in his eyes; he looked at her like he loved her, something you wish you could experience. 

“I should go. It’s obvious you two have some things to talk about.” You whispered softly, completely broken from the words Shouta said. You were expendable. He’d replace you then all of their problems would be solved. “I’m truly sorry for all of the trouble I’ve caused.” 

You wanted him to follow you, but once you reached the bottom of the stairs you realized that wouldn’t happen. Stepping into the kitchen you waved at the kids, telling them you’d see them tomorrow even though it was a lie. Closing the front door behind you, you let out a heavy sigh. Exiting the Aizawa’s residence was a bittersweet moment. You’d never see him again but knowing your absence would heal their family put you at ease. Your very presence was the reason their marriage was hanging by a thread, so the least you could do was set aside your own selfish desires and leave them be. 

Your commute home was different tonight. Normally you’d spend your train ride thinking about ways to impress Shouta but after tonight you could only think about the damage you’d unintentionally caused both them and yourself. You let lust cloud your better judgement and now you were the only person truly suffering from the decision you made. In the end, Aizawa and his wife had each other, but you were left with nothing. 

After getting off the train, you took a long walk home on purpose. You were in no rush to be in your apartment, confined to solitude and left with your thoughts. You went everywhere you could think of. Your favorite convenient store, the park you loved, you even stopped by a bar for a few minutes, but you could only avoid your home for so long. 

Opening the door to your apartment, you threw your things on the floor and screamed as loud as you could. Being home dragged you back to reality. This was the first time that you actually thought about yourself and the consequences of your actions. You needed that job to pay for school and your apartment. You needed that job for the experience. You threw all of that away for one night pleasure. This whole time you’d been so consumed with Aizawa and trying to be a part of his life that you put yourself on the back burner. 

You walked past the living room, kicking your shoes off along the way. Pushing your bedroom door open, you were met with a mess you left behind, your clothes scattered all over the room. You laughed, thinking about how you spent Friday morning picking out an outfit to impress Shouta. How naive of you to think you to think these trivial things would make him leave his wife. Your laughing turned hysterical as you haphazardly shoved your clothes into your closet. Cleaning your room was just the tip of the iceberg. You’d be cleaning up the mess in your life for a while, but for now you just wanted to rest. Falling onto your bed, you cried. 

You had everything you wanted right in the palm of your hands, but you were forced to let it go. 

—————————-

5 years later. 

You had everything you wanted. Despite some rough patches, you were able to obtain a Master’s degree and finally start your career. You started off in foster homes, working as a behavioral therapist. Then you started your own practice, making a home for children with quirks deemed unfit for society. A place where children who were cast out and abandoned by their families could learn and be loved. 

Grocery shopping was one of your favorite things to do. On Saturday, you spent your mornings roaming the aisles of numerous grocery stores, searching for food that would satisfy your children’s diverse palettes. It was one of the few times a week you got to spend to yourself. You were the manager, you employed your own staff and you were the primary provider for these children. Your days were always busy and your nights were often spent consoling terrified children, so the time you spent by yourself was important for your mental health. It allowed you to unpack any problems you had without being bothered by children or your staff. 

The dreaded snack aisle, the place you spent most of your time. It was important for you to find good, healthy snacks for the kids to enjoy. You stepped on the shelf to grab some applesauce, but your foot slipped and you fell. You were prepared to hit the ground, but you didn’t. The hand pressed against your back kept you stable as you slowly stepped down onto the tile floor. 

“Thank you.” You turned around with a smile that immediately faded when you saw who saved you. The joke you were prepared to make was wiped from your mind and you were only left with thoughts from your past. 

Shouta Aizawa, the man you spent a year forgetting about as you struggled through your final year of graduate school. The man whose touch was so intoxicating that no one else ever came close to giving you the feeling he did. The man who cheated on his wife with you. The reason you swore to never be someone’s side piece or second option again. Honestly, he was the reason you swore off men until you were stable and well rounded. A few years ago if you had run into him, you would’ve fled the store without looking back but now you felt secure and confident about your place in society. 

That didn’t necessarily mean you were excited to see him. It was cringe worthy to think about your former self running from his house, holding back tears. That moment was the closest thing to a heart break you’d ever experienced. It took months of therapy and focus to realize that their relationship problems weren’t your fault, even though you did play a part in what you assumed was their demise. 

“No problem. I would hate to see you slam into the ground.” You pressed your lips together, appearing unamused by his comment. When you didn’t reply, he knew he had spark up another conversation to keep you in his presence for a little while longer. “That’s a lot of groceries.” He peaked around you, looking into your cart filled to the top. 

“Oh, they’re for my kids.” You waved it off with a smile. They were one of the few things that genuinely made you happy. 

“Kids?” He choked. Peering down, he looked for a ring on your finger, but your hands were hidden behind your back. 

“Well not my kids.” You laughed. “I run a facility meant to help kids who were cast out because of their quirks. I’ve taken care of a few of them since birth so they feel like my own.” Your eyes lit up when you talked about them. You loved those children with your whole heart. “But speaking of kids, how are Eri and Satoshi?”

“They’re fine.” He nodded his head. “They’re both doing really well in school. Eri is actually thinking of applying for Yuuei and Satoshi is taking up soccer. It took a while to find Eri a new therapist. She just wouldn’t open up to anybody like she did with you.” 

“That’s good to hear and Mrs. Aizawa?” You whispered, almost afraid to receive an answer. There was a part of you that still cared, a part of you that still wished he would have ran after you 5 years ago. 

“Who knows.” He lifted his left hand, showing off his bare ring finger. That almost meant nothing to you. The last time you saw him without a ring on his finger, he was apologizing to his wife a few days later. “We split shortly after she found out about us. You were the least of our problems, though.”

“I know.” You said confidently. It was nice to hear him say that, though; the reassurance made you feel whole. “I’m glad you got to keep the kids. I can tell how much you care about them.”

“I can see how much you care about yours.” He motioned to your cart again. “Let me get this for you.”

“I couldn’t ask you to do that.”

“Well you didn’t, I offered.” He smiled, pushing your cart along before you had a chance to disagree. 

You followed behind him in shock that he’d do something so nice for you and the kids. Despite his tough exterior, you knew Aizawa was a softie; you thought back to how he used to talk about his students. 

The two of you stood in line, catching up on each other’s lives. You found out that they actually tried couple’s therapy to get over their rough patch but that didn’t help. The two of them were so busy that they could never commit to a time; it was then they realized how little they cared. You make time for the things you want and neither of them were willing to compromise. 

You told him about how it was working in social services. The work was brutal. It took a toll on your mental health seeing children neglected and abused on a daily basis. You were doing what you could to reform the system that villainized kids for something they couldn’t control. 

After paying for your groceries, Shouta escorted you to your car and helped you put your things inside. 

“It was so kind of you to buy those groceries.” Your mouth curved into a smile. Honestly, this profession didn’t make a lot of money. You relied heavily on government grants to care for these kids. “I could never repay you.”

“Let me take you out to dinner?” He said with a cocky grin plastered on his face. Shouta had to see you again and he hoped you felt the same. 

It felt insane to get involved with him after all of these years, but it didn’t feel like a coincidence that he was the one to catch you in the store. You couldn’t deny the emotions that came rushing back when you laid eyes on him. Regardless of the way things ended, your employment and your “relationship”, Shouta crossed your mind every now and then. What was the harm in one date?

“Sure.” You drew your lower lip in between your teeth as he handed you his phone to put in your contact information. 

“I’ll text you later on this week with reservation details.” He pulled you into a hug. “It was so good to see you.” He opened your car door for you, leaning down to get one last look into your eyes. 

“Yeah.” You shook your head. “You too.” He closed your door, leaving you in the car alone.

A small smile formed on your face. After all these years, Shouta Aizawa still had the same effect on you. 

———————————

Why did I agree to this? You flattened your skirt as you stepped out of the taxi. 

You were nervous. When Shouta asked you to accompany him to dinner you thought it was a joke then he sent you reservation details and you could’ve sworn your heart stopped. You used to dream of being on his arm, partaking in the “glamorous” life of a hero. This would be your chance to see how well you fit into his world. 

From the outside you could tell this restaurant was far nicer than anywhere you’d been in a long time. The night of your graduation your parents took you somewhere fancy, but even that didn’t compare. 

Opening the door you were instantly met by a hostess. “Name?” She smiled before looking down at the clipboard clutched in her right hand. 

Clearing your throat, you spoke. “It should be under Aizawa.” You pulled your phone from your purse, prepared to shoot him a text just in case there was a mix up. 

“Would you like to check your coat?” You nodded while removing your trench coat and handing it to the young man stationed on your left. “Right this way.” She placed the clipboard at her side before showing you to your table. 

The outside honestly didn’t do the restaurant justice. Reaching the top of the grand staircase, your eyes twinkled, completely in awe of the decor. Dimly lit chandeliers hanging from the ceiling. Large glass windows, draped in navy blue curtains, giving you the perfect view of the city. Flowers and candles adorning every table. And in the corner, was your date for the evening, Shouta Aizawa. 

He spotted you the minute you walked upstairs, completely enthralled by your appearance. Elbows rested on the table with his chin placed on his hands, he watched you carefully with a narrow gaze as you admired your surroundings before catching up to the hostess. As you drew closer, he stood to his feet to greet you. Sending the hostess off, he wrapped you in a hug. 

“This is nice.” You slid into the booth before immediately opening the menu to look at the drink options. You needed liquid courage to make it through the night. 

“Call it a late graduation present.” He smirked at you, removing his phone from the table so you had his undivided attention. “You look amazing.” He sipped his drink slowly, his eyes never leaving yours.  

There was no way you could lie and say you weren’t the least bit excited about the date. You spent the whole afternoon doing your hair and making sure your makeup was perfect. The dark smokey eye and burgundy lip went well with your outfit. A black two piece matching set: a wrapped crop top and a ruched maxi skirt with a slit in it. You matched your jewelry and shoes perfectly with the jacket that you had on earlier.  

“Thank you.” You grinned, happy that he noticed your effort. “So do you.” You didn’t say that because he complimented you, you meant it. His usually unruly hair was pulled back into a low bun, streaks of grey hidden under his black strands. The suit he was wearing fit his body just right, accentuating the muscles his hero costume hid. His neck was normally hidden under his scarf so just seeing it made you feel naughty. But most of all, he looked well rested and the look in his eyes told you he was more than prepared for a long night. 

The two of you started by ordering drinks and appetizers. You assumed that tonight would be boring, full of awkward conversations and quiet moments. But by the time the second round of drinks came out and the waitress brought your appetizers, the two of you couldn’t stop laughing. 

You never realized how much you missed your quick conversations and now that you had more time to elaborate without prying eyes, those quick conversations went on for hours. Shouta always knew you were smart, but the things you talked about tonight showed him just how much you’d grown. You went on about the children you were raising, giving him the details of their quirks asking for advice on handling them. He promised he would come help out one day and that made you happy. He talked about UA, his most recent group of students sounded promising. Shouta was a good teacher, while his methods didn’t sound gentle they were effective when training future heroes. It felt nice to talk to him like this. Two people talking about their professions, sharing wisdom and giving words of encouragement. 

As the night carried on, the two of you moved closer to each other, meeting in the middle of the large, circular booth. Your head rested on his right shoulder, laughing at the jokes he whispered in your ear about the couples sitting near your table. His hand rested on the skin exposed by the slit in your skirt. Even after all these years, nothing satisfied you like his touch. 

The dinner was great. Your entrees weren’t small like you feared they would be. You picked off of his plate, fed him from yours. From the outside, the two of you looked like a great couple and at one point that’s all you ever wanted: to look, speak, act like you belonged next to him. Though it was rare he carried himself this way, you could tell Shouta was made of money and even though he was underground, the status that came with being a hero was always a plus. Now that you’d established yourself, it felt right pursuing something with him. You were no longer his maid, you were a strong woman with your own practice. 

“You ready?” He whispered in your ear as the waitress took your plates. 

You shook your head yes. “Let me go to the restroom while you pay. I’ll meet you downstairs?” You smiled while sliding out of the booth and walking to the ladies’ room. 

You stood in the mirror giving yourself a quick pep talk before exiting the restroom and looking for your date for the evening. 

Shouta watched in awe as you descended the staircase, walking like you owned the place. Heads turning as they passed you by, but you could only keep your eyes on him. There was something he loved about your new found confidence. Something that only made him want you more. He took your hand at the last stair to help you and also to stop the stares from greedy men. 

Like the gentleman he was, Shouta opened the door for you, his hand discretely caressing your ass when you walked by. He followed you to the edge of the sidewalk, where you waited for a taxi to pull up. 

“You didn’t drive?” Shouta placed your coat on your shoulders from behind. He let his arms linger around your waist and he buried his chin in the crook of your neck. You shook your head no and you felt him smile. “Because you knew you’d be leaving with me?” Shouta’s mouth hovered dangerously close to your ear, his cool breath tickling the inside. 

“No, shut up.” You smacked his arm but that didn’t make him move. It actually made him hold you closer. You could feel a bulge growing in his pants. It was nice to know he was just as anxious as you. Truthfully, you knew Shouta was right about your reason for not driving, but you’d never give him the satisfaction of telling him that. “So, where are we going?”

He didn’t answer your question, instead he grabbed your hand and led you down the sidewalk adjacent to the restaurant you just dined at. The night life was so comforting. The two of you moved against the crowd like young lovers who couldn’t wait to get their hands on each other. The constant chatter drowned out the nasty things he said to you so shamelessly. 

The hotel Shouta booked for the weekend was just as nice as the restaurant you went to. He was honestly trying his hardest to wine and dine you. He wanted you to feel special and you did. 

The two your way past the concierge’s desk and onto the elevator. The minute the doors shut behind you, Shouta pinned you in the corner, ghosting his lips over yours. He squinted his eyes, searching yours for any hints of reservations and sense of regret. When he found nothing but adoration in those doe eyes of yours, he kissed you. Instinctively, your body moved toward his. Pushing yourself up from the steel elevator walls, you rested your arms lazily on his shoulders, your fingers caressing the nape of his neck. As the doors opened, he bit his lip while shaking his head, mumbling something along the lines of how he couldn’t wait to get his hands on you. 

The room’s dark interior immediately set the mood. The matte black furniture meshed so well with the dim lights and greenery. You were in the middle of Yokohama, but you felt like you were in the jungle. 

Throwing your jacket over the chair, you allowed the cool air in the room to hit your skin. Hotel air conditioning units always worked better so for the time being, you turned it off. You wanted the room to be warm and muggy. You wanted to see Shouta sweat. 

“Did I tell you how good you look tonight?” Shouta’s hands landed on your hips and unlike earlier you decided to indulge him. 

Rolling your eyes, you pressed against the bulge forming in his pants. “About a hundred times, but I appreciate every single one.” You dropped your head back so you could look him in the eyes. “I’m really glad you invited me out tonight.”

“I’m glad you accepted.” He placed a small kiss on the tip of your nose. “I really missed you.” He released his grip on you, going to sit on the bed. 

“Really? How much?” You smiled, walking to stand in between his legs. 

You felt powerful standing over him but the minute his hand touched your waist, you lost all control. His touch was like a drug for you. You’d done a great job of holding yourself together all night, but you finally allowed yourself to give in to the feeling of passion that made you high. 

Shouta peeled off your outfit, his eyes taking in every inch of your bare skin. You were hardly bashful but the intense glare he was giving had heat rushing to your cheeks. He placed soft kisses on your stomach as he slid your skirt down your legs and held it still so you could step over it. You were left in nothing but your lingerie and the five inch heels you wore tonight. 

The lingerie set you wore was burgundy with hints of gold and orange in the trimming. You wanted something that embodied fall, your favorite season, and this set did just that. The lacy bra did a good job of barely covering your nipples and the underwear were so thin they could be ripped off. One look at you had Shouta ready to take you, but he didn’t want to rush the night. He wanted to savor every moment with you. 

Standing to his feet, Shouta pulled you into a sensual kiss. Your heart pounded in your chest and the familiar feeling of butterflies swirled in your stomach. Eyes closed, you could only focus on the way he made you feel. When you landed on the bed, you let a warm laugh escape your mouth. You were so entranced by the kiss that you hadn’t even noticed he’d turn you around, so he could sit you on the bed. You extended your legs as his fingers gilded gently from your thighs, over your knees and down your shins. Stopping at the straps of your heels, he undid them and pulled them off. 

“Fuck.” He cursed under his breath. You looked breathtakingly beautiful. Shouta was upset with himself for letting you walk out his house five years ago, but everything happened for a reason. All that matters is that he had you again and he wouldn’t let you go. “Baby, you really look amazing.” 

You only laughed as you began to undress him. The roles had reversed. Now, Shouta was hovering on you, exuding power and sensuality. Button by button, his bare chest and chiseled abs were exposed to you. It’s as if the curtains were being pulled back and the angels were harmonizing; his body was just that perfect. The man aged like fine wine and you knew it was the hero work that kept him fit. You threw his shirt onto the loveseat in the corner before moving on to his pants. You used one hand to quickly remove the belt and undo his zipper, eager to see his growing cock straining under the confines of his briefs. 

Placing his index finger under your chin, Shouta lifted your head so you were looking up at him. Your wide eyes, beaming with vulnerability, made Shouta smile to himself before leaning down to kiss you, softly at first, and then the kiss became so sloppy, so desperate that it made you dizzy. You placed your hands on his cheeks, gripping his face firmly to keep yourself stable. The kiss never broke, even when you lifted your hips to scoot yourself further on to the bed while Shouta crawled to join you. Once settled on the plush, cotton comforter he used one hand to gently push you back on the bed, while using the other rub circles on your lace covered clit. You moaned into his mouth, allowing his tongue to slip inside. Pulling your panties to the side, he pushed two fingers along your slick folds. While his weight was unevenly distributed, you pushed him from on top of you and quickly pinned him down on the bed. 

“Damn.” He mumbled, turned on by the way you tossed him. 

Lowering yourself onto his clothed member, you began to slowly move your hips back and forth. You almost felt like you were too old for dry humping, but when Shouta coughed to keep himself groaning you knew you made the right choice. The friction you created had you both excited for everything tonight had in store. 

Leaning down, you peppered kisses along his neckline, using your tongue to tease the soft spot right above his collar bone. The sounds that escaped his lips were euphoric, making you hum happily as you snagged his ear between your incisors. Smiling, you let your tongue roll from your mouth and licked from his ear to the base of his neck, leaving a trail of saliva along the way. His low groans had transformed into heavy breathing and curse words littered with occasional “please”. You were soaking wet, watching as he squirmed under your touch. You knew his neck was sensitive but his reaction made you think he could cum from this alone. 

Shouta used one to free his cock from his boxers, stroking himself desperately as you assaulted his neck with your teeth. The feeling of him touching himself underneath you sent a shock through your body, making you moan against his neck before switching sides. You focused on the left side of his neck, alternating between open mouth kisses and sucking hard enough to leave a mark. You traced small circles over the trail of saliva you made on the right side of his neck, giving him enough stimulation to make his body stiffen briefly before relaxing with a laugh. You could feel a little of the mess he made on your ass. You took upon yourself to clean him up. Hopping off of him and moving your face toward his dick, you licked him clean before giving him a smile. 

“Such a tease” He growled, earning a laugh from you. 

“Look at what you do to me. Seeing you so vulnerable just-.” You sighed, unable to put the feeling into words. Grabbing his hand, you guided his fingers to your folds, now dripping wet from the sweet sounds he made in your ear. 

Taking his hand back, he sucked the juices off of his finger. Licking his lips in satisfaction, Shouta smirked up at you. “Fuck, you taste the same.” Forcefully pushing you on your back, he pulled your underwear off and spread your legs. “I’ve missed this.” He smiled, rubbing his calloused hands over your moisturized thighs. 

He planted kisses along your inner thigh. The stubble on his chin left behind a strange sensation that only made you want more of his touch. The sassy remark you were about to make about him teasing you was ripped from your throat along with the air you were about to inhale. His warm tongue lapping over your folds was enough to send you into shock for a few seconds. You’d forgotten how generous of a lover Shouta was, but he was quick to remind you. Painfully slow, long licks had you iching for more. Rolling your hips, you fucked yourself against his tongue, making sure he passed over your clit every now and then. 

Once you got used to his pace, he switched it, moving his tongue faster, focusing more intensely on your throbbing bundle of nerves. You placed your hand on his head, gently running your fingers through his black locks. He stopped suddenly, making you whine before plunging two long fingers into your dripping core and securing his lips around your clit. He sucked on you ferociously while continuously pushing his fingers into your g-spot. 

“Shouta.” You moaned, mouth wide open, a drop of drool sliding down your cheek. “Add one more, please.” You begged and when he did as you asked, you rewarded him with a soft moan. 

“I love a woman who knows what she wants.” He talked into your cunt, the vibrations from his voice made you whimper. “I know you’re ready to cum for me.” He quickened the pace of his fingers, twisting them ferociously, yearning for your release. 

Your stomach caved in as a pulsating sensation ran through your pussy. Shouta shook his head, using the flat of his tongue to catch the juices from your orgasm while still stimulating you. 

Lifting his head, you noticed the small string of saliva hanging from his chin. As he crawled closer to you, you pulled him into a hungry kiss. Desperate to taste yourself and also feel his tongue swirl around your mouth. 

“Fuck me.” Even though you were still panting from your first release, your voice was alluring to him. 

His body hovered over yours with his arms on either side of you. He pushed all of his weight to the left side of his body and used his right arm to guide himself inside of you with a hiss. He alternated between quick experimental thrust and rubbing his tip along your folds while he adjusted to how wet and warm you were. 

Rolling his neck, he let out a breathy laugh. “You feel so good.” 

Shouta dropped onto his forearms so he could be closer to you. The sweat forming on his body felt cool against your skin. His forehead rested gently on top of yours. You inhaled the air he exhaled. In this moment, you felt like one. His thrusts were slow and methodical, allowing you to feel everything he had to offer. The love you felt pouring off of him was unlike anything you’d experienced in a long time. Even if you knew he didn’t really love you, it felt like and for the night  you were fine with that. 

His gaze was gentle yet carnal, full of lust and passion. You couldn’t handle it so you closed your eyes much to his disapproval. “Look at me.” He demanded, his low voice sending chills down your spine. Your eyes fluttered open to find him looking smugly at you. 

Your lips found their way to his ear, releasing your low, drawn out moans that only fueled the need fuck you senseless. 

Shouta’s large hands snaked around your neck as his pace sped up; his slightly curved cock slamming into you again and again. He swiftly threw one of your legs over his shoulder, allowing himself more access to the deepest parts of you. The sensation was overwhelming for the both you; you could tell by the way his eyes rolled back and how erratic his strokes became. Removing his hand from your neck, he used the pad of his thumb to put pressure on your clit. 

“Shouta.” You moaned, pushing your head so far back into the mattress that your back started to arch off the bed. His name was the only thing you could think of; you repeated it like a mantra as he drilled into you. 

“Don’t hold it in.” He talked through his teeth, focusing on holding himself together long enough for you to cum first. “Come on baby. Show me how good I make you feel.”

You melted into the mattress as the swirling pressure in your stomach fizzled away. Shouta let your juices flow onto his throbbing dick before pulling out and releasing his seed on your stomach. Flopping on the bed next to you, he sighed in satisfaction. 

“Let me get you a rag.” He smacked your thigh. 

“It’s okay.” You smiled. “I’m just gonna take a shower. Join me?” You whispered seductively. 

“No.” He laughed at your pouting face as he rolled from the bed and walked to the bathroom. He was never big in sharing showers and he would use your brief absence to get some work done. “But you enjoy yourself.” You stood to follow him in the bathroom and run the water. 

He wiped himself down before leaving you in the bathroom by yourself. Stepping into the black marble shower, you felt instant relief on some of your sore areas. The hot water and the steam relaxed your body in a way only a nice drink after a long day could. Sitting on the bench in the shower, you let the water run over your legs. Head pressed against the wall, you thought about the day with the goofiest smile plastered on your face. Shouta really made you feel like a child, giddy from the flashbacks of the evening. 

You washed yourself off using the hotel’s soap. The strong yet relaxing scent of eucalyptus was in their products and you loved it. Rising yourself off one final time, you stepped out of the shower and dried yourself off. Wrapping the towel around you, you stepped into the bedroom. 

“I actually didn’t bring any clothes.” Your voice caught his attention, pulling off his glasses he turned in the desk chair to face you. You bit the inside of your cheek, hoping he’d have something for you. “I wasn’t expecting this.” You motioned to the hotel room. Except, a part of you was expecting this, hoping he’d whisk you away for a romantic week. 

He walked to the closet, pulling out a suitcase and throwing you one of his many black, long sleeved shirts. It stopped mid thigh on you so you were fine roaming the room with no underwear on. Shouta returned to his spot at the desk, watching you look at yourself in the mirror.  

“Looks good on you.” He patted his lap and you ran to sit in it. 

“You think so Eraserhead.” He nodded with a laugh while running circles on your bare thigh. “That means so much coming from you.” You teased. Looking at his tablet, you realized he was doing work. “Hey! No work.” You smiled, locking his device before hopping off of his lap and making yourself comfortable in between his legs on the floor. 

“You won’t let me rest will you?” He laughed. “I’m not young anymore.” He bit his lip while looking at you settled on your knees, groping his cock through his sweats. The second you felt him grow, you stripped him of his pants and boxers. 

“Could’ve fooled me.”

You opened your mouth and stuck your tongue out, allowing all the saliva you collected to slowly drip onto Shouta’s semi erect dick. In one swift motion, you swallowed him whole, wanting nothing more than to feel him grow in your mouth. As you felt him getting harder, you pulled off his cock, opting to run the flat of your tongue along his shaft before swirling around his tip and giving it a quick kiss. 

Shouta had enough of your teasing. Placing his hand on the back of your neck, he guided you down his length, setting a pace that was pleasurable for him. Your eyes squeezed shut as you forced all of him into your mouth, bobbing your head and hollowing out your cheeks. 

“You’re doing great, baby.” He pushed your hair out of your face. “Just like that.” 

You hummed in satisfaction at his praise, sending vibrations down his now fully erect cock. You managed to make it to the base, opening your mouth wider, your tongue rolled out of your mouth to lick his balls. He hissed at the sensation, thrusting his hips up so you could do it again. 

You ignored your gag reflex and your need for air. The only thing that mattered was pleasing him. Tears formed as Shouta picked up the pace, fucking your throat mercilessly. Heat began to pool between your legs. Sending one hand down, you toyed with your clit, making you moan around his cock. 

“I see you touching yourself.” His words came out slow. “If you want to fuck again, you’re doing the work this time.” You nodded as you pulled his dick from your mouth. 

Standing to your feet, you turned around giving him a view of your ass. Bending over, you reached your arm through your legs, grabbing his length and giving it a few pumps. Shouta smacked your ass while you aligned his dick with your entrance and sunk down on him. 

“Shit.” You both moaned, completely in love with the feeling of him stretching you out. 

You remained still before sinfully rolling your hips. Shouta’s hands shot to your waist, steadying you and halting your movements as he enjoyed the feeling of his cock inside of you. 

Gripping the armrests of the chair to steady yourself, you started to bounce on his length. His grip on your waist tightened, keeping him somewhat in control of your speed. This feeling was amazing. Shouta had flashbacks of the first time you rode him and your skills had only gotten better. The way you clenched around him as you raised and fell on to his thick cock had him seeing stars. 

His hands moved from your waist underneath the shirt you were wearing to grope your breast. He pinched both of your nipples, rolling them between your fingers, sending a tingling sensation down your spine. Your head fell back onto his shoulders, and your mouth dropped open. Shouta nibbled on your ear, only adding to the overwhelming stimulation you were feeling. 

“Kitten.” He moaned into your back before biting down on your shoulder. 

Kitten? The term of endearment he only ever called you in your dreams. Heat rushed between your legs and to compensate for the feeling you bounced even harder. Shouta noticed your increase in speed and thrust up matching your pace. 

At this rate, Shouta would cum any minute. 

He lifted you off of his length, allowing himself a few seconds to collect his thoughts. Standing up, Shouta bent you over the bed to take control. His thrusts were quick and powerful, pushing deeper into you with every stroke. He rubbed your pussy, spreading your slick to your ass before licking his thumb and sliding it into your puckered hole. Your hands flung out to grab the sheets, grab something to keep you sane. Muffled moans letting him know, you liked the new sensation. 

“You look so pretty like this.” Shouta used his free hand to continuously slap your ass. You whimpered from the harsh contact, only making you wetter by the second.

Removing his finger from your asshole, Shouta grabbed both of yours arms behind your back, using them to pull you back on his cock and keep you from running from his strokes. 

“Any louder and we’ll have complaints.” His gruff voice made you weak in the knees. “Fuck, your close. I can feel it.” 

It didn’t take him long to learn your body. Shouta was an observant man; he knew how to make you feel good and he knew when you were about to cum. He was the perfect lover. 

Your arms fell to your side as Shouta released his grip on them, opting to use his right to push down on the small of your back while the left made its way to your mouth. He placed his thumb in your mouth, allowing you to twirl your tongue around it before he pulled on the corner of your lips, hooking you like a fish that fell for the bait. He propped one of his legs up on the edge of the bed, fucking you from an angle that made your whole body tremble, especially your legs, virtually reduced to putty as he pounded into your sweet spot. 

Shouta was close too. You could feel it. His cock throbbing inside of you, ready for his own release. He snapped his hips into you one last time, balls smacking your cunt. You sunk into the mattress, completely worn out from the night as your final orgasm rushed through you. 

“Don’t.” You stopped him from pulling out of your aching cunt.  You wanted to feel his warm seed inside of you. 

Shouta pulled out of you slowly, leaving you feeling empty. You could feel the mix of your juices running down your leg. It was more than satisfying. 

You could fall asleep right where you were: still bent over the bed, ass in the air. You had a busy day and tonight was the stress reliever you needed. The sensation of a warm washcloth against your pussy made you melt. Shouta cleaned you off, making sure he got everything that was dripping 

“Do you need anything?” He pressed a lingering kiss on your cheek, making the corners of your mouth turn up. 

“A water would be nice.” You said while crawling into the bed and getting comfortable under the covers. 

Shouta grabbed you a water bottle from the minibar and put on his sweatpants before joining you in the bed. He wrapped his arms around, pulling you closer to his warm body. 

“You remember what you said to me?” Shouta whispered in your ear. His voice husky from how tired he was. You shook your head no, taking a sip of your water. “I know now might not be the time, but when it is, I’ll be here for you.” He repeated your words verbatim. “Now is the time.”

You flipped over to face him. “Listen, I was naive then but now I don’t have time for lies. I have kids to worry about and I don’t need my ment-.”

Shouta shut you up with a kiss. A searing kiss that made you warm all over. “I’m sorry for how I treated you all those years ago. I knew how you felt about me and I took advantage of that, but I’m serious this time. I don’t believe in fate but I’m so glad I ran into you at the supermarket. I know this is sudden seeing as how we just reunited, but I’m ready whenever you are.”

“I’m ready now.” Sleepiness washed over you, it almost felt like you were dreaming when he said those words. “Let’s just start slowly, okay.” 

You didn’t want to rush things and he completely understood. The two of you had just found each other and given your past, you were right to be cautious. 

“Perfect.” He placed a kiss on your forehead and you smiled. Closing your eyes, you nodded off to sleep. 

When you woke up in the morning, Shouta was in the process of placing the room service he ordered on the desk. You yawned with a stretch, catching his attention. 

“Morning.” He smirked at you, bringing you the tray of breakfast. “Sleep well.”

“What are you doing up early?”

“It’s 11:30.” He deadpanned, pointing to the clock. “Your phone has been ringing like crazy. I tried waking you up but you wouldn’t budge.” 

You raised an eyebrow, grabbing your phone and looking at your call log. You realized it was one of your employees that called you multiple times and immediately called them back. She told you one of the kids was having an episode and only wanted to see you. Jumping out of the bed you threw on your skirt from last night and tucked Shouta’s large black shirt into it. 

“Everything okay?” His brows drew together as he watched you frantically gather your things. 

“No, one of my babies isn’t feeling well.” You explained. “I’m so sorry but I really have to go.”

“But you didn’t drive. Let me take you. Maybe I can help.” He followed your lead, grabbing his things and putting on some clothes. 

“Are you sure? I don’t want to inconvenience you.”

“What did I say last night?” His question was rhetorical. “You have me, now. Nothing you ask me to do would be an inconvenience. I want to help.” He said, making you pause in your tracks. 

Walking up to him, you planted a gentle kiss on his lips. “You really are perfect. Now, let’s go.” Grabbing his hand you rushed out of the hotel. 

It was a simple gesture but it meant so much to you. Also, it wasn’t the first thing Shouta did for you and your children. He was willing to drop his relaxing weekend to help you. He was willing to deal with you, your kids and everything else you had to offer because he knew you would do the same for him. This whole time you’d been trying to see how you fit into his work when the real question was how would he fit into yours. 

The way things looked, the two of you would be just fine. 

[quicksilversquared]

Move to Safety: Chapter 2 (of 6)

After Adrien just happens to spy Nooroo in his father’s office, he’s sent into an panic. His father is Hawkmoth, which means that Adrien is in serious danger.

Thankfully the Dupain-Chengs are more than willing to step up to the plate and lend a helping hand.

links in the reblog

The next akuma attack was three days post-discovery. Adrien had been concerned- or, rather, frankly paranoid- about the sudden lull, but Plagg had reminded him that his father was busy at this time of the year, the end of the school year and exams lining up almost perfectly with the push to finalize the summer line, coordinate the summer runways and photoshoots, and in general make sure that Gabriel was in the best possible position going into the summer season. It meant long hours going over designs and then making sure that the finished product lined up with the vision, of making sure that staff were lined up for all of the events, of ensuring that Gabriel's international locations were doing well...

Well, it was really no wonder that Hawkmoth's activity had slowed for the time being.

During his first year as Hawkmoth, his father had left the coordination of pretty much all of those things to Nathalie and a couple of the senior designers, presumably so that he could keep akumatizing people at the same rate as he had before (the official excuse, of course, was that he had still been suffering from grief because of Mrs. Agreste's disappearance and wouldn't be able to juggle everything). Apparently things hadn't gone quite as perfectly as Mr. Agreste had wanted (and it was really hard for his designers and other staff to get last-minute things done when akumas were interrupting them practically every day), forcing Mr. Agreste to switch the majority of his attention to the company during the frantic rush. That in turn meant that his attacks had to step down for a period.

Of course, dialing back on the attacks didn't mean stopping them, as evidenced by the akuma alert lighting up Adrien's phone.

Adrien swallowed a groan as he silenced the alarm, sliding his phone back into his pocket before anyone could notice it. At least the akuma had showed up between classes, making it easier to slip away. He headed to the bathrooms, hiding in a stall until the other boys in the bathroom had cleared out and it was safe for him to transform. Chat Noir slipped out the bathroom window, then charged across the city to join Ladybug, who had gotten there before he had. She was already focused on the fight, eyes narrowed as she spun her yo-yo and sent bits of the melted marshmallow that the akuma was shooting at her flying away.

Chat Noir really, really wanted to taste the marshmallow and see what it was like- it smelled amazing- but Ladybug had had words with him about eating akuma-generated food before and he really didn't want to get scolded again.

(But marshmallow...)

"It's a chocolatier," Ladybug told him breathlessly as he dropped down next to her. "He was trying to make something with marshmallow filling and his intern accidentally tipped the entire vat over and spilled it. Or that's what I'm guessing, at least. It's hard to tell."

Chat Noir frowned as he extended his baton, pushing the Chocolatier back. "He got this upset over that?"

"It wasn't the first time that the intern has spilled stuff, I'm guessing."

"Gotcha."

Soon enough, their battle was in full swing. Chat Noir focused on the akuma as much as he could, but in the back of his mind there was the constant reminder that it was his father behind this. The same person who had (occasionally, rarely, once in a blue moon) tucked him into bed at night when he was younger, the same person who had used to proudly smile when Adrien first started modeling and showed a talent for it, the same person who Adrien had spent years of his life trying to please- that was the man terrorizing Paris, preying on people's emotions for- what? Presumably Mr. Agreste was trying to get Mrs. Agreste back, to prevent whatever it was that had made her vanish.

She wouldn't have wanted all this to happen, of that Adrien was sure.

The lump in his throat only went away when he remembered something Marinette had said the previous night as they had worked on their homework together shoulder-to-shoulder on the floor, wrinkling her nose in disgust as she pointed out that Gabriel Agreste, world-renowned fashion designer had been (perhaps somewhat indirectly, they didn't know how the akuma victims' personal preferences played into their outfit design) responsible for the parade of what were frankly fashion disasters. He had been the one to come up with the names, presumably had some hand in dealing out the powers, had definitely been the one responsible for his own (incredibly tacky) design as the Collector, and yet...

Audrey Bourgeois had just written a scathing column about the akuma designs, in an odd twist of irony. No wonder his father had been in a bit of a foul mood right after that.

"Well, that was a bit of a sticky situation," Ladybug joked as she released the purified akuma at the end of the fight. She watched it go, fluttering over the sagging mountains of melted marshmallow. "Not a bad akuma, though." Her teasing grin turned towards him. "Good job not eating any of the marshmallow."

Now that the fight was over, guilt and anxiety promptly weighted down his gut like lead. He should tell her about Hawkmoth now, before they had to split and go back to their respective schools. But the lump in his throat was back in full force now, and he could barely form words around it. How was he supposed to tell Ladybug without letting on who he was? He hadn't figured that out yet. "I- yeah."

He didn't want to tell Ladybug who he was, not yet. He was worried about her treating him differently and thinking that he couldn't handle the fights anymore, worried about her judging him for not figuring it out sooner, worried- well, that it could mess everything up. He had begged Marinette right away after they got back up to her living room not to tell Ladybug who he was, in fact. Not that he thought that Marinette would go behind his back to do that, but he just- he wanted to be sure. He couldn't handle another reveal, not even with his partner.

She had tried to- to protest, he assumed, or at least tried to say something, but he had cut her off. With her family's support, he could manage his father's defeat without adding more identity reveals to the mix.

Ladybug's expression turned anxious, even as she tossed her Lucky Charm into the air to cast the Cure. "Are you okay, Chat Noir?"

"I-" He was choking on his own words. Ladybug's fingers ran down his arms, wrapping around his wrists steadyingly. "I, uh-" He had to spit it out, he had to!- "Yeah, I'm fine. Just- just tired."

Ladybug's eyes scanned over him, then nodded. "Okay. Take a nap? I want my partner feeling his best."

Chat Noir managed a smile. Today wasn't the day he would be telling his partner about his father, apparently. Next time, for sure. He had to pull himself together soon. "Right."

  Adrien couldn't help but be thrilled to be allowed to have dinner with the Dupain-Chengs that evening. Nathalie hadn't even needed to consider the request before allowing Adrien to go, which was a relief.

If she or his father had noticed that he wasn't sleeping at home anymore, she wouldn't be allowing him out. The fact that he was still getting his freedom meant that so far, his nightly escapes were going unnoticed.

Of course, it was still early. Not even an entire week had passed yet.

"It's going to be weird to go home and then come right back," Adrien told Marinette with a small laugh as he helped her chop the veggies for dinner. He had headed over to her family's house right after school, and was going to be staying there until the Gorilla came around to pick him up (walking to and from Marinette's place to his own and without supervision could only happen during broad daylight, apparently), and then staying at home for all of thirty minutes or so before going right back over. "I'd rather just stay over, but I know they wouldn't allow it. I mean, it took how long for them to allow me to sleep over at Nino's house, and he's, uh..."

"Also a guy," Marinette filled in when Adrien floundered. She reached over to scoop up his chopped vegetables and toss them into the frying pan. "I get it. And I know you've mentioned that you aren't planning on telling Nino about, uh, everything, and you staying over here, but you could probably tell Nathalie that you're going to sleep over there on, like, a Friday or Saturday evening, so then you can sleep in on the weekend instead of having to wake up super-early. Unless she would check in with Nino's family ?"

Adrien blinked at the suggestion, pausing mid-chop and then setting down his knife to properly consider it. It was really, really tempting- they were just coming up on their first weekend with the new arrangement and even the thought of having to get up early so that he could go back to the mansion without being spotted sucked- but would Nathalie check in with Nino's family?

Ugh. He really, really wanted to, though. Being able to sleep in and then actually properly get to sit down and eat a Dupain-Cheng breakfast? That would be amazing. But did he dare risk Nathalie finding out that he was lying about his whereabouts?

"We could also claim that we're having a sleepover for all four of us here," Marinette offered after a minute had passed without Adrien saying anything. "That might be more acceptable. We can say that it's so we can do lots of studying for finals together, without wasting the time to go home and then meet up again the next day."

"Maybe," Adrien agreed, liking that more. "And we can actually study, and invite Nino and Alya over during the day." He grinned, remembering their last "study" session. "As long as they actually study and don't pull us off-track again. We'll have to tell them that they'll get booted if they start making out or flirting with each other again." He glanced over at Marinette. "This weekend, do you think? Or next weekend, so that I can be more fully rested going into finals?"

"Why not both?" Marinette smiled at his startled expression. "Mention both at once, and see if she'll go for it. If she says that two is too much, then decide which weekend you want to go for."

Adrien smiled. Marinette was so smart. "I'll do that."

They worked in silence for a few more minutes, Adrien finishing with the vegetables and Marinette taking over the cooking from him, expertly stirring things together and adding in spices. It smelled amazing. Adrien hovered, not sure what he could do to help, but he knew that if Marinette could think of anything for him to do, she would tell him.

"Ah, Adrien, I was hoping that you would be here!" Mrs. Cheng said cheerfully, sticking her head around the door. "I need something from your room and I was wondering if you could grab it for me."

Adrien blinked in surprise. "I- I mean, sure, I can go in, but- why do you need to wait for me? It's your house, you can go in."

"Oh, I couldn't! That's your room, sweetheart. I'm not going to go in there without your permission." Mrs. Cheng smiled at him. "It's your space now, and I don't want to intrude on it."

Adrien frowned, still not quite understanding. "But... it's a guest room. In your house."

"And we gave that room for you. We don't want to intrude on your space. It's your room now, not the guest room." Mrs. Cheng glanced over at Marinette, then back at Adrien. "Would it help to have you redecorate a bit? I know it feels like a guest room, but we can change it up a bit if it would make you more comfortable."

"Yeah, we didn't exactly have much time to redecorate for you when you moved in," Marinette chimed in right away, before Adrien could protest. She reached over and shut off the burner. "We can go do something about that right now, if you want. Dinner can wait for a little while."

Adrien glanced at Mrs. Cheng, but she was nodding and sliding into the kitchen behind Marinette to take over the cooking. "You two go do that. I'll take over this, and then I can come help once this is in the oven."

Blinking in surprise but not resisting- there was no protesting when any of the Cheng women put their minds to something, Adrien had learned that long ago- Adrien let himself be dragged down to the guest room's door, then nearly ran into Marinette when she drew to a sudden stop in front of the door. He blinked, then realized what was going on when Marinette stepped aside and looked at him expectantly.

She wasn't going to go into his room before him. He had to go in first and then invite her in.

"I'm really fine with you guys coming in," Adrien told her with a small, self-conscious laugh as he pulled the door open to the guest room that he was staying in. "I'm used to it. I mean, at h- at the mansion, the maid comes in when I'm not there all the time. And then Nathalie and my father just come in when they want- I don't know if they come in when I'm not there, but when I'm there, they just come in if they have something that they want to tell me. The Gorilla always knocks before coming in unless it's an emergency, but he doesn't always wait for a response before he does."

Marinette was frowning. "That's not right. I mean, sometimes my parents come into my room, but it's only when I've given them permission, or there's an emergency, or- okay, maybe sometimes they get a little over-excited when I have, uh, friends over and then they pop in, but they've gotten better about it after I talked to them about that. It's important to have privacy in your own room."

Adrien smiled slightly. "That sounds nice. I'd love to have- well, I think it sounds nice, to have a space that's private. To only have people come in who I want to come in, and when I want them to come in..."

"You'll have that here." Marinette waited until Adrien waved her in before entering the room. She glanced over the room, then winced. "Oh, this really looks like a guest room. It doesn't look like you've used the bed at all!"

"I wanted to keep it tidy!" Adrien protested. "In case...uh, in case anyone came in, I guess." He ran a hand over the top blanket. It had taken a few minutes that morning to get it perfectly straight, with sharp corner folds. "I wanted to keep it looking nice."

Marinette was staring at the bed in- surprise? Horror? "I think I was the one to make the bed last before you came, and it didn't look nearly this neat. And I only make my bed, like, half of the time when I get up. You don't have to get up early to make the bed to- to photoshoot standards."

Adrien swallowed. "Right. Okay."

"I mean, if you want to, that's a different story," Marinette said hastily, apparently completely misunderstanding his expression. "Then it's fine! But if you're just doing it because you think we expect it of you...that's not the case, not at all."

"Right." Adrien shuffled from side to side, looking at the room. "So, uh... where are we meant to start?"

He honestly didn't know. After all, it was a very nice room- a pale blue on the walls, some decorations that Mrs. Cheng had probably brought back from China and family photos hanging on the walls, some with Dupain-Cheng family members who Adrien recognized and others with people that Adrien didn't know- the Cheng grandparents, he was guessing, and some other extended family members on both sides. There was a bookshelf with an assortments of books- some baking, some cooking, some about family histories and culture in China. There were a couple books in Mandarin, and others in Italian. There was a dresser with an attached mirror part that had a gorgeous embroidered piece of fabric draped over it, with a couple knick-knacks placed on top of that, and a very standard bed: sheets, two pillows, a couple plain fleece blankets that had been folded at the foot of the bed, since it was too warm to use them. Under the windows there was a radiator, painted gleaming white. A storage chest sat at the foot of the bed, and a small table was next to the door, the perfect spot to set keys or a bag to grab on the way out.

In short: it might have been smaller than he was used to, but it was cozy and, like the rest of the house, had been put together to reflect the Dupain-Cheng family and their interests, instead of just being pulled from an interior design magazine.

"The bed," Marinette decided after a moment. "We have a bunch of sheets that we can use for this one, actually- uh, we keep them in this closet, actually."

Once again, it took Adrien a second to realize what Marinette was doing, and then he smiled. She wasn't going to go digging in his closet without him going first. He rounded the bed- there wasn't as much space as he was used to, but it was hardly cramped- and opened the closet, stepping aside so that Marinette could step in front of him to scan the piles of linens.

No matter how important Marinette found it for him to take the lead in his own room, the fact remained that he was significantly taller than she was and if she was going to help him out at all with figuring out which set of linens to pick, she needed to be able to actually see the options. The closet was pretty full of sheets and blankets, and Adrien had no idea which ones were the right size for his new bed.

"Okay, so this bed is the same size as mine," Marinette said, glancing back at the bed. "Which means that you'll be looking at this side of the closet. And, uh, I really had a thing for having a differently colored bed every week when I was younger, so that's why, uh..."

Adrien laughed. "That's why you have an actual rainbow of sheets in that size, you mean?" He reached out, running his fingers over the pile. There were a good eight or nine colors at least, which... well, that was pretty impressive. "How long did you spend in 'zillion-different-colors' phase?"

"A couple years?" Marinette shrugged at Adrien's expression. "I don't remember. But there were enough sheets that they never really got worn down, so we just stuck them all in here when I grew out of that and decided to decorate my room in a pink theme instead."

"Ah." Adrien looked at the closet again, then reached for a set that was a blue that reminded him of Ladybug's eyes. "I like these."

"D'you want help switching out the sheets?" Marinette asked, reaching in to help Adrien pull the sheets out without disrupting the rest of the stack. "And- hmm. We have a couple blankets that could go with those sheets. Not that you really need a blanket right now, since it's almost summer and it's getting hot, but if there's any cold nights and you get chilly, it's better to have them out and ready."

Adrien nodded as he picked out a green blanket to go with the blue sheets, though he had a really hard time imagining ever feeling cold here. Aside from the fact that they were above a bakery- the warmest possible business Adrien could possibly imagine, the entire building just smelled warm, if warm could have a smell- the whole atmosphere was just so warm and friendly and welcoming. "Help would be good. I can tidy up a bed in the morning, but making it from scratch I'm not great at." He grinned, remembering the one and only time when he had tried to make his bed at the mansion, after the maid had to leave early due to a family emergency and had only gotten as far as washing and drying Adrien's sheets. He had assured her that he could handle the actual bed-making so that she could go right home and... well, he had tried.

Fitted sheets were hard, that was all he was going to say. It did not help that his bed at the mansion was so large.

(There might have been some less-than-optimal language that he let loose while wrestling with the fitted sheet. No one could prove anything.)

"It's easier with two people, at least," Marinette said cheerfully, setting the linens down at the foot of the bed so that she could start stripping the sheets that were there. "Easier to wrestle with the mattress that way."

Adrien grinned. "Yeah. I've only got a white belt in mattress wrestling. Just a beginner."

Marinette snorted. "Does wrestling have belts? I thought that was karate."

"You question my qualifications? How dare!" Adrien flopped down on the bed dramatically, pressing the back of his head to his forehead. "...but you might be right."

Marinette laughed and gave his side a gentle shove. "Get up and help me, you lump."

"And now I'm being bullied!"

Adrien loved Marinette's unrestrained laughter.

It didn't take long to remake the bed with the new sheets. The blanket that Adrien had grabbed was a little large for the bed, but it didn't seem to bother Marinette. They just made sure that there was an equal(ly large) amount of blanket hanging down either side of the bed, placed the pillows on top, and then stood back to admire their work.

"You can bring some of your books and things over and we can make space on the bookshelf," Marinette said, leaning over to look at the bookshelf. "My parents can get another bookshelf and stick it in the living room and move their books there so that you have the space. They just have things in here because it had just been an extra room. And then I know I have pictures of you and Alya and Nino and I, and one of you fencing, and- oh, we can look. These others can probably find a new home, too. And the storage chest- that should be empty. It's mostly there so that visitors could put their suitcases inside and have them out of the way."

Adrien stared at Marinette. "That- that's a lot. Like, getting another bookshelf and moving it- that's pretty permanent. Like, Ladybug and I will defeat my father by the time summer starts, probably."

"Yeah, well, you'll need somewhere to live afterwards, won't you?" Marinette sat down on the bed, patting the space next to him. Adrien settled next to her, unable to resist the invitation. "And maybe the city will try to make arrangements for you to be able to stay at the mansion, but you can stay here, too. I know it's not as big, but..."

"I love it here," Adrien assured her, leaning back on his hands and admiring the room, too-wide blanket and all. He didn't need things to be perfect, or huge, or expensive. "If your parents are all right with me being here, I'd love to stay. I've had enough of the mansion for a while, I think."

Marinette's head rested against his shoulder. "Okay." He could feel her shift as she settled. "I'm glad you like it here. We just want you to feel like it's actually your space."

He still didn't think that that was entirely necessary, but Adrien wasn't going to argue with them. Instead, he leaned back into Marinette's side, enjoying the quiet warmth. After a few seconds, though, he couldn't keep quiet any longer.

"I haven't told Ladybug yet," Adrien said quietly, dropping his head back against Marinette's. "I tried, during the last akuma attack, but I chickened out."

"I- I can tell her, if you can't," Marinette offered after a moment. "Next time she comes nearby during patrol, or during an attack."

Adrien shook his head. "I swear that I'll tell her at the next attack. I just needed more time to figure out how. It's only been a few days." He swallowed, remembering the way that his throat had closed up around his words. He had wanted to tell Ladybug, but he didn't know how. "I don't- I've been trying to think of how to tell her without giving away my identity, but I just blank."

He could hear the frown in Marinette's voice. "Are you sure that you don't want to just tell her who you are? I don't- she doesn't seem the type to judge you about the whole situation, and it seems like it would be easier-"

"Not right now. It's not safe." Maybe the final battle was (in theory) in sight now that he knew Hawkmoth's identity, but he was leaning towards the safer option of not letting any more people find out who Chat Noir was. He had seen the downsides of when superheroes knew each other's identities in action with Rena Rouge and Carapace, and they did not need anything like that happening again. "Like, whenever we have distractions going on in our civilian lives, it shows during battle, even if we try not to let it. It's the same when we have superhero stuff that we're distracted by. This would probably be the same. Like, what if we know each other? What if we slip up and yell the other person's civilian name during battle?"

Marinette nodded, an odd expression on her face. "Yeah, I can see where that would be bad."

"It would be awful. Our advantage would just be gone." And since they currently had a serious one-up on Hawkmoth and Mayura, they really didn't want to lose that. "So I'm not going to tell her until Hawkmoth is defeated. And like I said, I don't want her treating me differently, either, and I worry that she might if she knew that Hawkmoth is Chat Noir's father. I can still fight."

Marinette was watching him consideringly, but she smiled when he looked up at her. "That's understandable."

"I just want to be careful, and not knowing each other's identities has worked out for us pretty well so far." Adrien let out a long sigh, trying to let go of the stress that he had been holding on to. "After he's in jail, though, I want to tell her. Hopefully we'll be allowed to then."

"I'm sure you will be." Smiling, Marinette leaned forward to give his hand a gentle squeeze. "But for now, let's not worry about that. After all, we have a room to redecorate."

  By the time dinner was ready to come out of the oven, the guest room was...well, not quite Adrien's room, not yet, but it wasn't nearly as guest room-esq as it had been before. Marinette had pulled some photos she had of him and their friends from her room and put them in some empty picture frames that they had around so that he could put them up in his room, and Mrs. Cheng had cleared off the desk and dresser surfaces so that he could put some of his things on them. There was space on the bookshelf, too- apparently Marinette's parents had an extra bookshelf in their bedroom and could move things there- and even a little in the closet, though Marinette's parents were still brainstorming where they could move some of the stuff in there so that it would be accessible when they wanted it.

Adrien still thought that it was overkill, but the idea of having a room that he knew people weren't popping into without his knowledge was- well, it was really, really nice. And he couldn't deny that being able to make the space his own was a fun idea, and if he was going to stay there after Hawkmoth and Mayura were defeated, like the Dupain-Chengs were clearly planning... well, he would feel more comfortable if he felt like the space was really his own, Adrien knew that.

It was just that they were going so out of their way to accommodate him. Marinette's parents were busy, he knew that, and yet they had spent a not insignificant amount of time clearing out the guest room so that he would be able to move in more fully.

"You can bring more stuff over tonight, or whenever you have the time," Marinette was saying as they sat down around the table. "Books and more pictures and whatever knickknacks you want to have here."

"The Jagged Stone CD you signed," Adrien said immediately, grinning when Marinette blushed. "And the posters!"

Mrs. Cheng laughed. "Any possessions that my daughter didn't make and sign?"

Adrien had to think about it. "Uh...there's the jacket that Marinette made me last year. That isn't signed."

"I embroider my signature on everything I make," Marinette reminded him. "So that's signed, too."

That made Adrien pause. "Oh. Uh, then I guess other gifts that I've gotten from friends? I'll see as I go along, probably. And I'll probably wait to move a lot of stuff until after school is over." The and until after my father and Nathalie are in jail went unsaid.

"We can help," Mr. Dupain assured him. "We might need one person working the counter at all times, but the rest of my staff can keep the kitchen running in back. Just say the word."

Adrien couldn't hide his smile. "Thank you."

"And now- did you have a good day at school?" Mrs. Cheng asked, changing the topic, and Adrien couldn't help but smile as Marinette chimed in, telling her mom about the exam review that they were doing at the moment.

He loved having people who he could talk to about his father, because it made the whole process a little less lonely and he knew that he didn't have to handle it all alone (excluding Plagg, of course), but it was nice to talk about normal things, too. To be part of a normal family that sat down and ate dinner together, instead of sitting alone at his family's long dining room table and hoping that his father might show up.

Adrien wasn't going to be hoping for that anymore, that much was obvious. Even when he had dinner at home- and he was going to have to, he knew well enough that he wouldn't be able to get away with going to Marinette's house for dinner every night- he would be hoping that his father and Nathalie were busy, or even better, out of the house entirely.

It wasn't likely, but he could still hope.

The Gorilla picked Adrien up after dinner and he spent a cursory hour in his bedroom at the mansion (no one even checked in on him, which was unsurprising) before zipping right back over to Marinette's house. She let him in via her balcony, and Adrien gave her a quick hug good-night before heading down to his room.

As Adrien settled into his bed, he couldn't help but smile. The room felt a lot more comfortable now, even though they had only really changed a few things. That, and knowing that the Dupain-Chengs considered it his space, not just an in-use guest room...

He hadn't even known that he wasn't fully relaxing before but now, Adrien could sleep soundly.

[magicalforcesau]

Dancing With Ghosts in Your Garden~ Chapter 18 - Year 2: February

(ao3 link)

In lieu of the incident with the sleeping draught, all prefects were mandated to enroll in Professor Palpatine’s brand new weekly Potions seminars. As the misstep with the Vitamix potion along with Maul’s nearing presence showed, it was ideal that all prefects be properly trained in the event that professors were once again subdued. This, they felt, combined with Professor Fisto’s ongoing dueling club, would prepare them.

Obi-Wan’s doubts of how prepared they could possibly be for something so unpredictable grew stronger with each day. Although he was already enrolled in the advanced potions class, he would never deny the opportunity to learn more. If anything, it would at least offer more practice.

“Given that it’s February, I figured it best we start with a common favorite amongst the masses of troublemakers,” Palpatine’s shoes clicked on the ground as he paced at the front of the room.

From what Obi-Wan understood, Palpatine didn’t receive any punishment for the accidental sleeping potion brew. Yoda had, of course, received a rather scathing howler from the Ministry at his supposed flightiness, of which he took the blame for. It seemed Anakin had stepped up and claimed it was he who accidentally knocked the draught in the already brewing potion.

That all certainly added up and did not help Anakin’s reputation amongst his peers.

“Any guesses to what that would be?” Palpatine asked, eagerly taking in the small crowd of Hogwarts’ best with expectant eyes.

Because this was a class full of prefects, each were considerably decent students and wanted to learn. There were exceptions, Obi-Wan realized as he looked over to a nearly snoozing Zeb, but they were outliers.

“Love potions?” Breha Organa said rather dreamily. Obi-Wan didn’t need to turn around to know she’d been looking at Bail as she said it.

“Right you are, Breha!” Palpatine smiled, “Amortentia is the most powerful love potion in the world, at that. Many of you and your students are for the first time diving into the wondrous and mysterious landscape that is romance. Some of you aren’t even aware that you are.”

Did he look at Obi-Wan on purpose? No, that would be silly. Palpatine always took care to rove eye contact throughout the classroom. It was a sufficient method of maintaining focus and Obi-Wan knew this, but he still shifted his gaze immediately elsewhere like he’d been caught copying homework.

“Love and potions aren’t all that different, really.” He continued, “The right and organic combination makes a fruitful and prosperous brew. The wrong and inauthentic combination is bitter and not made to last.”

“And if you’re not careful, you could end up with a wrinkly, scrawny little creature.” Zeb added knowingly, earning a few chuckles throughout the group.

“As if you’ve got anything to worry about there.” Caleb muttered, and much to Zeb’s dismay, acquired a more popular response.

“Boys, please.” Palpatine chastised, “I don’t want word to travel that Gryffindor’s prefects lost them points.”

“Cody would have an aneurysm,” Satine whispered and Obi-Wan only nodded in response. It was no secret to either of them that their friend was less than pleased with how bleak Gryffindor’s odds of obtaining either the House or Quidditch cup were becoming. If he heard that Caleb and Zeb worsened those odds, neither would be awaiting a very pretty conversation.

The troublesome two seemed to recognize this and justly shut their traps.

The class turned back to Palpatine, who seemed rather satisfied with the change in their mood and circled around the cauldron at the center of his desk. From it, emerged a pink fog that resembled a cloud at sunset and judging by the smile its scent drew from Palpatine, it smelled as pleasant as it looked.

“A love potion manufactures the deepest desires from the person who ingests it, manifesting them all at once in an intoxicating fashion that causes them to see the intended target in a different light.” He said almost reverently, “Ironically, it’s called a love potion, when it should really be called an infatuation potion.”

“That’s because you can’t build love from a substance.” Satine muttered from beside him. “Try as some might.”

Obi-Wan stared at the cauldron. He’d heard of amortentia. Evidently, a cheap ineffective version was sold at Zonko’s in Hogsmeade, though he never took much care to notice. He didn’t know much about love, save for the fact that it seemed highly unlikely for anything to recreate something as complicated as attraction.

She raised her hand, “Professor? Aren’t love potions banned at Hogwarts?”

“That they are,” Palpatine said with crossed hands, “Though that’s not to say they haven’t been smuggled in before.”

“Why would they do that?” A familiar high pitched voice from the back called.

Despite his interest in the subject, Obi-Wan couldn’t resist snapping his neck in turning to see none other than Anakin Skywalker sitting at the back desk, looking incredibly small in stature next to Onaconda Farr. Farr, in his defense, looked just as confused by Anakin’s presence as Obi-Wan felt.

“What are you doing here?” Obi-Wan asked him, “This is supposed to be for prefects only.”

“Not to worry, Mr. Kenobi, I did grant Anakin permission to attend.” Palpatine answered before Anakin could muster up a smart response, “Anakin shows a real knack for potions and given the circumstances, I would say it’s best that he be included whenever he could be protected.”

Obi-Wan slumped back in his chair, feeling properly admonished. It wasn’t that he didn’t think Anakin was capable. It was quite the opposite, actually, but there was an order to these things and learning advanced spells before one was ready did not seem indicative of a sound idea. Anakin needed to learn the building blocks still, whether he believed it or not. Despite his talent, he knew there was an absence of maturity to handle heavy source material. Dueling was one thing, as there was an obvious precedence for it right now and it was typically taught to some degree during second year anyway. Teaching Anakin about love potions felt more like giving a dog a steak and telling him not to eat it. He could try to convince everyone that he was over his crush on Padmé all he wanted, but it simply wasn’t true.

“To answer your question, Anakin,” Palpatine continued, “When someone is too blind with desperation to see reason, they will do just about anything to acquire what they want. A love potion, while sounding frilly and fun, occludes all rational thinking from the person it's given to.”

“And typically, it’s not ingested voluntarily.” Satine added.

Obi-Wan frowned, thinking of the potentially dastardly effects such a tool could provide for a desperately lovesick person. It was no different than being under a curse, in a sense, because the poor sap trapped in such a state had no agency whatsoever.

“How does one tell if someone is suffering from the effects of a love potion?” Fenn Rau asked.

“Why, you see them every day in young and happy couples as you walk through these halls. They’re starry-eyed, flushed, unspeakably happy, practically in a trance.”

“How are we to tell the difference then?” Obi-Wan asked.

“These features tend to be a good deal more exemplified and elongated.” Palpatine said, “For instance, while the honeymoon phase is technically normal, it’s really not meant to last. There’s also known to be loss of memory in the person as the potion begins to fade. We advise that you all keep an eye and see if you notice any excessively clingy and almost controlling couples.”

Obi-Wan thought about his parents, finding it very hard to believe they ever had any semblance of a honeymoon phase. They were so professional all the time that he’d rarely seen them even smile in the other’s presence. Of course, he was always splitting up sneaky couples that tried to sneak off to snog, so he supposed he did have some experience witnessing what Palpatine was referring to. Part of him was having a difficult time reconciling with the fact that it was their ancient potions professor who was explaining to them the complexities of romance.

“Because of the dangers that this possesses,” He waved a little pink vial around for all to show, allowing the light to catch it in a way that made it sparkle, “I believe it’s important that you understand these properties quite well and that you take care not to share this information outside of this room.”

There was a warning tone to his voice that was rarely used and Obi-Wan swore everyone sat up even straighter, though he doubted that was possible for Satine, who already appeared quite alert.

“It’s okay to take notes, of course, right?” Hondo asked from the other back corner of the room opposite to Anakin.

“Yes, but-” The older man did a double take as he whipped back around, “Hondo, what are you doing here?”

Obi-Wan thought it was fairly obvious what Hondo was doing and why he was suddenly so apt to take notes. He hadn’t thought to say anything when he originally saw him, seeing as if Anakin was invited, maybe he’d thought to include another unexpected guest. Hondo was possessed for a significant amount of time, after all.”

“Just trying to perfect my recipe is all.” Hondo had the gall to shrug, “What’s so wrong about that?”

“You mean besides intruding upon a meeting where you are not welcome and admitting in advance that you intend to sell an illegal substance throughout the school?” Palpatine asked, “I suppose we could discuss your time management skills, seeing as you have plenty of potion’s homework that you could be catching up on.”

Reading the room for a change, Hondo sighed like a great disservice had just been done to him, “You can’t fault a guy for trying.”

“Actually, I can. 15 points from Slytherin.” Palpatine crossed his arms, “And I expect your essay on Felix Felicis on my desk tomorrow morning.”

“My tutor isn’t going to like that.” Hondo grumbled as he walked by Obi-Wan, “He’s not even finished my Charms presentation.”

“Why would you say that to us?” Satine hissed, knowing full well that they were now going to have to look up the legitimacy of Hondo’s new “tutor” in their dwindling free time.  

“I’m honest to a fault!” He shrugged as he fully exited the room and was promptly locked out by Palpatine. He even took the effort of using two padlocks to secure the job. To be fair, Hondo was quite slippery.

“Now,” He said as he clapped his hands together once, “Why don’t we get to the important part? Brewing!”

***

This was a colossal waste of his time, skills, and resources.

While Sidious normally enjoyed when the school devolved into chaos, he did not appreciate when it stood in the way of his plans. Right now, his former apprentice was the obstacle that could feasibly destroy everything he’d worked tirelessly to achieve, all before it could truly start.

He knew he should have killed him when he had the chance, but Azkaban just seemed all the more fitting for the murder machine to waste his days away at the hand of his own failure. He would not make that mistake ever again.

So, it seemed Sidious’ own interests aligned with the rest of his colleagues: get rid of Maul. It felt peculiar- to be on the same side as the enemy, but if he wanted to defeat them, he needed this loose cannon of a pawn to be decimated before it was too late.

And through it all, the putrid “open-minded” community only served to remind him why they needed to be brought to an end. In what world would enlisting the Potions professor to teach love potions be useful? How he managed to seem convincing, he was unsure, because there was no greater waste of time than the frivolous pursuit of love. Well, unless it was being manipulated as a fulcrum for change.

Even with as little soul as he had remaining, if any, he still found the smell of amortentia to be utterly arousing. They certainly wouldn’t enjoy to know what he smelled when he breathed in amortentia: fire, ash, rubble, stained blood.

They should be barricading, sending students out in troves to hunt the demon down, and utilize the muggle-borns as bait in a trap to be sprung. Maul couldn’t resist the hunt. He knew such instincts never changed, not even from the waning sense of purpose that Azkaban reduced men to.

Instead, here he was, giving a pointless lecture on the dangers of love potions. After which, they’ll have another practice dueling session with snowballs. It was pitiful. At the very least, they should be using stones. Children needed to learn pain at an early age. They needed to become so familiar with the sensation that they found home in it. In the hearth of that home, is the power that exists from within. Only then, can they prevail.

He glanced to the back corner of the room and felt his lips twitch. Between this year and the last, Skywalker was becoming quite acquainted with pain. He grimaced as he took in the rest of the lot, noting how soft they all were as they nervously discovered what attracted them when they leaned over their brewing cauldrons. At least he’d been able to kick that waste of blood Ohnaka out. He was spared of that particular headache, especially when just looking at the boy angered him to no end when he considered how deeply that botched experiment failed. Truly, that family couldn’t do anything right- not even when under hypnosis.

He had no doubts that Maul was scoping out the land, realizing just how weak these wizards had gotten since he was in school- that his lessons from Sidious had always reigned supreme and that no one stood in his way, save for Yoda and Sidious, himself. That would be disastrous if anyone witnessed a reunion between the two. They would know instantly.

Then again, if Sidious were to capture and kill Maul, he would only further his popularity amongst the simpletons that allegedly “ran” their community. Perhaps, there could be salvaging of this wreck. Tyranus need not be the only one to pull strings in the wake of Maul’s drama. It was only fitting, since Sidious was the marionettist and this was to be his show.

Not only that, but such a feat would certainly impress the boy, who clearly had a sound reason for disliking Maul. While Sidious loathed the concept of needing to work towards the trust and approval of a child, understood that in due time, it would be worth it.

Even if such a boy nearly killed them all with his own klutziness.

Sidious breathed a steadying breath, just barely turned away from any possible lingering gazes.

He moved over to his desk and opened the top drawer. He needed a drink.

***

Satine, like many of the curious girls in her year, had done fair research on the subject of amortentia. Apparently, it had ruined its fair share of marriages as well as mental health states, making it completely illegal to produce for private or public subsidization. It seemed, curiously, only the aurors could do so with Ministry approval. That, much to Satine’s confusion, was the case for many subjects.

“Because I would hate to have a bunch of little zombies in my class, we’ll just be smelling the potions today.” Palpatine announced.

Despite her knowledge that amortentia affected everyone differently, she still wasn’t quite expecting the drunk-like sensation that filled her up from head to toe as she took a deep breath in from the fumes that emanated off the surface. Everything around her seemed to move in slow motion and her chest rose and fell with the relaxed notion of falling asleep, except she simultaneously never felt more stimulated in her life.

She’d never known that you could smell so many wonderful things at once yet still differentiate them for what they were and more importantly, how it got her flushed in a way that made her shift in her seat.

New books, homemade apple pie, crisp fall air, the lingering remnants of a minty aftershave wrapping around her like a scarf…

She started out of her reverie, blushing too mad to even consider looking to her left no matter how curious she suddenly was. Her heart was beating out of her chest and if she wasn’t absolutely certain of the potency of amortentia, she’d have the decency to be more embarrassed. Instead, she willed herself to calm down and refused to breathe through her nose any further, no matter how warm she felt when she had.

While none of what she witnessed was news to her per say, it wasn’t like she made a habit of lollygagging and daydreaming in the middle of a classroom setting. It was quite disarming to be so vulnerable yet also so close to what (or who, for that matter) was driving her crazy to begin with.

“Problem, Mr. Kenobi?” Palpatine was suddenly standing in front of them, which was at least a little bit of a distraction.

A ringing in her brain wanted desperately to ask him what he smelled, but she felt herself frown deeply when she noticed Obi-Wan was leaning with his entire face in his little cauldron, trying desperately to catch a whiff. Surely, if he got any closer, he was going to accidentally inhale the potion through his nose.

“I might have brewed it incorrectly.” He muttered, echoing a bit from still having his head in the cauldron.

“Let me see,” Palpatine urged him to lift his head and under normal circumstances, Satine might tease him for the little creases that the rim brought to his face.

The professor raised his nose to the fumes that still wafted through the air and smiled dreamily. She wondered if they would ever know what he was seeing when he inhaled the scent. It was none of their business to ask, but she really couldn’t picture Palpatine being in love with anyone.

“No, no, it’s perfectly correct,” He said with the airs of residual glee, “Why?”

Instead of giving him a straight answer, Obi-Wan turned to Satine, “I think I need you to move.”

Any previous concern, as per usual with Obi-Wan, was replaced with a scalding sort of annoyance only reserved for him, “What? Why?”

As she held her own special adverse reaction to him, he had one for her that matched. His eyebrows furrowed as he gestured to his cauldron. Sometimes, he was far too serious for his own good, “As lovely as your perfume is, you don’t need to go so heavy-handed with it! I can’t smell the potion.”

Satine, who initially believed they were going to get into an argument, found that she had no points to be made, because all that came out of her mouth was a little puff of air. Palpatine, if she had the eyes to spare him a look, was equally as surprised, even if not nearly as emotionally invested in such a rebuff.

“What?” Obi-Wan finally asked, growing more annoyed at not being in on the punchline.

Everyone else was suspiciously quiet too, much to Satine’s growing unease, but she could hardly spare a thought other than to say, “I’m out of perfume, actually. I sent Copikla home yesterday so my mum could send me a new bottle.”

Instead of being annoyed, the clouds seemed to clear, if only a little bit, and he flickered back to the potion, “But how-”

“-It smells different to everyone.” Palpatine, who looked between the two of them with his face stretched in discomfort and eyebrows raised beyond physics, clarified with a tone that was clearly meant for only them, “Based on what the individual finds attractive.”

All of the color seemed to wash out of Obi-Wan’s charmingly embarrassed face as his mind worked rapidly to wrap his head around that answer. Even though she hadn’t breathed in her potion again, Satine still swore she was suddenly feeling the effects of it.

“I- Well,” He tried to formulate a response, but to his credit, he had just admitted that he was at the very least attracted to her perfume (which she made the mental note to stock up on more frequently), in front of the entire class of prefects and Anakin.

“Oooooooh Obi-Wan likes perfume.” Anakin, while completely missing the point and a big teasing opportunity, shattered the tension that previously froze the entire room and everyone burst out into a fit of needed laughter. Even Obi-Wan laughed, though nervously, as he flashed Satine the occasional glance here and there through lowered lashes, as if trying to gage her reaction to this accidental admission.

She smiled. Clearly, it was to her benefit to read ahead of him.

“For what it’s worth,” She said in the midst of the uncontrollable chatter that erupted thanks to Anakin’s offhand comment, “You smell nice too.”

He blushed, which she found she quite liked the shade of pink on his face, “Thanks.”

It didn’t address the underlying implications, just as neither of them seized the moment to do so on Christmas Eve. She found it was just as frustrating trying to guess what was going on inside of his head as it was waiting for him to do something about the things she did know.

As much as she wanted the cat to be fully out of the bag, she knew the middle of Palpatine’s potions class wasn’t the time or place.

***

“I believe it’s a mistake to have any more Hogsmeade trips this year,” Qui-Gon said to his other heads of house and to Yoda, who was staring quite pensively out the window, “Not when we know what we know. It’s quite possible that Maul has an entrance to the school if he truly is behind what happened to Bultar Swan.”

“We have no real proof that he is, though.” Shaak Ti said, “It certainly doesn’t seem like his style.”

“While I know the usual term “innocent until proven guilty” is our mantra, I think we should consider being more hesitant with Maul.” Qui-Gon said.

“I agree,” Windu nodded, standing firmly next to him, “Though having more students out of the school would allow us a proper amount of time to sweep the school and see if he had any secret entrances.”

“We have that same opportunity at night.” Qui-Gon said.

“You know this school shifts and changes between night and day,” Palpatine said warily, “It is ever-moving and Bultar Swan was attacked in broad daylight in a common room.”

“Why are we not interviewing more Ravenclaws then?” Windu asked, “We’ve got to do something! Skywalker’s mother is missing and we all know that boy isn’t going to lay down and allow for speculation to simply rise without doing something foolish.”

“I don’t appreciate your assumptions of Anakin.” Qui-Gon said, “He’s a bright, even if impulsive boy, who is going through an unspeakable grief.”

“No one twice his age should have to endure what he’s going through,” Shaak Ti said kindly, “Let alone as young as he.”

“I’m not saying he has no reason to act out.” Windu raised his hands, “I’m merely stating that it is only a matter of time before he takes matters into his own hands.”

“That would make it easier for Maul, unfortunately,” Palpatine agreed, “Perhaps we should motion to shut off the Floo network?”

“Done that, I have.” Yoda spoke up, “Because used it, he did.”

“For what?” Qui-Gon asked eagerly.

“Unknown location, he accessed.” Yoda mused, “Unregistered through the network, it is. Talk to Dooku, I suspect.”

Palpatine frowned, “That can’t be good.”

“No, it can’t.” Windu agreed, “Can you extend your protective charms to Hogsmeade, Yoda?”

“Do that, I did, after we woke up from the sleeping incident.”

“Oh, so it’s safe then.” Shaak Ti shrugged, “The dementors haven’t detected Maul on the inside and he was last seen on Diagon Alley.”

“I’m sure this is quite exhausting for you, Headmaster.” Windu acknowledged.

It was true. Extending his powers over an entire settlement as well as the castle at all times would have drained any normal wizard to death. Yoda, as it were, was not a normal wizard. Even still, it was visible on his worn features that he was exhausted.

“Safe, the students should be,” He said instead, “But careful we will still be. Search the school we will for secret entrances while they are gone, we will.”

***

“Are they gone yet?” Anakin asked, ducking up from where he’d been digging furiously through his trunk. Rex who was sitting on the window sill keeping watch over the massive gates of Hogwarts nodded slowly.

“Yeah I think so,” He confirmed, stretching his arms above his head and yawning, “I dunno mate, don’t you think a nice Saturday in might be nicer than trying this again. Don’t you remember what happened last time?”

“Psh!” Anakin waved a hand, “Well we’re certainly not trying anything like that again. Although I would like to get another look at that sword.”

“I figured you’d seen enough swords in your short life,” Rex rolled his eyes, “Didn’t Dooku intend to sacrifice you with one?”

“It was still cool, but I’m not really trying to go to Hogsmeade, just give off a good impression.” Anakin shrugged before he pulled out his nicest T-Shirt, swiftly pulling the one he had been wearing off and switching them out, “Well how do I look?”

“The same but in green,” Rex deadpanned leaning his head on his hand, “If all we’re doing up here is playing dress up then I’d much rather get this show on the road.”

“Oh come on,” Anakin checked himself out in the dingy mirror on the back of the door. He was really hoping he’d run into Padmé; he thought she’d like it. He’d already seen her leave, but overheard her talking to her friends about Rabé meeting them later and taking the tunnels. His mum had bought it for him over the summer and he tried to push past the rising feeling of sadness, “We had to wait until all the prefects left anyways, I’m not really looking to be caught and dragged back here by any of them and especially not Zeb, who was eyeing us up pretty hard at breakfast.”

Rex shuddered, “Definitely don’t need him tossing us through the portrait hole again. It’s not our fault that the rest of the second years left without us!”

“I’d hate to see what happens if we’re caught alone of our own accord,” Anakin grinned, despite the true statement, such a thing wouldn’t stop them, “Well, let’s go before Windu gets here to babysit.”

“Right,” Rex grimaced, standing up and grabbing his wand. Anakin grabbed his as well, throwing it into his robe, it was much too cold to go around without it, and they headed down and out of the common room. He really hoped no one would snitch on them.

The two traversed the halls carefully. Keeping quiet for once to listen for approaching footsteps and ducking into a few empty classrooms to avoid the ghosts lurking around the otherwise empty halls. It took much longer than they’d have liked to make it down to where the tunnel’s entrance would begin. Luckily, the map showed Rabé’s little figure moving in that direction too, marking a bit of a clear path. She would lead them straight to Padmé.

Anakin’s heart rate increased for more reasons than being caught.

He thought better of it. Obi-Wan would probably kill him on the spot if he slithered out of the tunnel and into Hogsmeade. Not to mention, Maul was lurking around in the area looking for him. Maybe, if they caught up with Rabé in the tunnel, he could simply give her the necklace to give to Padmé.

It didn’t sound incredibly indicative of his house in terms of bravery, but he knew at least Obi-Wan would approve of his method.  

“Almost there!” Anakin grinned at Rex, but almost had his head knocked clean from his body when Rex grabbed his robe and yanked him hard into an empty classroom, “Wha-?”

“Shh!!” Rex was very much alert and his eyes narrowed as they both heard footsteps echoing off the walls. The footsteps paused just outside of the door and Rex cursed under his breath as a shadow moved towards the entrance. Rex glared at Anakin for a few minutes before mouthing, ‘You owe me!’ and straightening.

“Mr. Fett?” Palpatine’s confused voice echoed off the stone walls, “What are you doing here? And all alone?”

“Sorry Professor,” Rex gave Palpatine a rather over the top concerned look, “It’s just, I haven’t seen Anakin since breakfast and he did mention he was thinking about coming to see you.”

“To see me?” The professor sounded a little more surprised than Anakin thought he should, but perhaps he was trying to avoid looking like he picked favorites, “Well I certainly haven’t seen him. I’ll keep an eye out, but I’m going to need to escort you outside with the other second years.”

Anakin winced, of course even Palpatine wouldn’t be willing to overlook a student wandering the halls without an escort. He’d have to bring Rex back something good from Hogsmeade.

“Alright, thank you Professor,” Rex nodded, although he didn’t look very thankful in Anakin’s opinion.

Their footsteps faded away, but still Anakin waited a minute longer before darting from the classroom himself.

He wandered the empty halls, being extra careful to listen and flicker his eyes to the map. Rex was a little more perceptive than he tended to be. Anakin certainly didn’t want to get caught, but at least he knew what story to go with if he did.

Finally, he reached the entrance of the tunnel, looking around carefully, he quickly slipped inside and hurried to close the entrance, plunging him into complete darkness.

Anakin pulled his wand out, lighting it with a, “Lumos Maxima,” They’d been working to improve their maximizing skills in charms recently and Anakin felt it was paying off. The tunnels were rather boring and unremarkable. He remembered them being pretty long, though he’d never made it all the way to the end the last time.

He took his time, kicking away rocks and humming softly. He still didn’t want to give his position away if there was someone scouting the tunnel for mischievous students, but boredom without Rex crept in fast.

He paused a moment at an odd noise and listened hard. It was a soft shuffling noise and despite the echo, it sounded like it was coming from behind him. Could it be another student trying the same thing he was? Unlikely, most of the houses were pretty locked down outside. He wasn’t sure why the professors had been so insistent on a supervised snow day, but most students went for it.

That left the possibility that he was about to be caught.

Letting the fear of boring evenings in detention spur him on, he picked up the pace until he was running rather swiftly. With the way his wand was swinging, the light bounced around enough to make him motion sick so he gave it a quiet, “Nox,” not letting up on the speed of which his shoes pounded the ground.

He slowed when he nearly tripped over something lying on the ground, but wasn’t quick enough to avoid running right into someone.

Anakin fell backwards with an, “oof,” He tried to catch his breath for a moment, “Sorry, Rabé,” He said softly standing up, “While I’ve got you, I’ve got a question for you. Lumos.”

His wand tip glowed again, revealing him face to face with a student’s face frozen in a scream. This was not Rabé. Anakin stumbled back, tripping on what felt like the fabric of a scarf, before he saw the glint of eyes reflecting the light off his wand.

Yellow. Bright yellow eyes narrowing as they realized they’d been caught. Anakin felt his heart leap in his chest. Fear filling his lungs, causing him to nearly choke on a scream. He heard the eyes take a step forward and he scrambled to his feet and fell into a sprint. His wand light faded as his concentration waned and he shoved it into his robes.

He shouldn’t be running from Maul, because that’s who it was, of course. He’d vowed revenge even if Qui-Gon always gave him that sad sort of look when he said it. He should be back there giving that kidnapper a piece of his mind. He was the Chosen One, it was his job to save everyone and take down the bad guys.

Even as these thoughts played in his mind, he continued to sprint, fear pushing him into overdrive. He nearly screeched again when he ran full tilt into something human knocking them both to the ground.

“Bloody hell!”

“Rex!” Anakin was relieved to find someone he knew, but it wasn’t enough to stop the adrenaline that had him back on his feet and pulling desperately on Rex’s arm to get him to move, “We have to go now!”

“Great, I just escape Palpatine only to get caught again. Who is it? Windu?” Anakin nearly growled at the slow pace Rex was moving at.

“It’s Maul! We have to go!” That was enough to get him moving.

They didn’t stop to even breathe again until they burst from the wall and right into Professors Palpatine and Qui-Gon who nearly got bowled over.

“What-” Qui-Gon looked ready to start a lecture and Palpatine even looked like he was ready to dole out a few point reductions, but Rex cut them off quickly.

“Anakin saw him!” Rex was pointing his wand at the entrance to the tunnel like Maul was about to come out right then and there for a fight.

“Saw who?” Palpatine asked head tilting to the side in curiosity and Anakin nearly spat the name out as he joined Rex in his battle stance.

“Maul.”

***

The deafening screech that stretched from Hogwarts through Hogsmeade with painful clarity was one that very few students attributed meaning to. It wasn’t unreasonable that students, particularly younger ones, immediately leapt into disorder, running hither and yon, terrified they were about to be dive-bombed. It was a horrible sight to see, even if it didn’t make his job all the more difficult.

Designed with the vocal cords of mandrakes, the emergency siren was only used in times of utter duress and was a means of warning students and faculty to return to Hogwarts at once. Historically, it hadn’t been officially sounded since the early twentieth century. Even still, prefects were always trained on what to do in the event of hearing the siren.

All the training in the world still didn’t fully prepare Obi-Wan for the very real visceral reaction that the ear-splitting sound brought. Of course, he could not spare a single moment to think, a tough reality for a Ravenclaw, and immediately moved forward with what he’d been taught: gather his house, ensure they were all in company, and get them back to the school.

While not given a direct message with it, everyone seemed to share the same thought as he did. There was only one true reason that the archaic alarm would be used right now accompanied by the dementors that jetted across the sky: Maul was close.

Not only close, but likely in their midst.

Shop owners wasted little time in evacuating their premises and battening down the hatches, effectively snuffing the warm glow of Hogsmeade in a singular swoop. His brain was busy scanning the hysterical crowd that was amid constant motion, searching for every and any blue-robed student that he might come across. It occurred to him now that there was perhaps more meaning to the explicitly placed Hogsmeade dress code than the professors led on to. It certainly made rounding up students a lot easier when they were color-coded.

Moving around on the ice-laden stone walkways? Less easy. He’d not only had to catch his own balance in his haste, but many other wobbly students. Even Satine’s elbow was caught by him a time or two, of which she spared no time to thank him, though he knew otherwise she would. She was just as stern as him in their mission, practically grabbing students and sliding them across the way to the huddle of other students, hardly blinking in the process.

It was with this goal in mind that he was able to develop a razor focus that practically tuned out the alarm. That, or the pounding in his ears did a decent job of it. Silently, he found the space to be relieved that Anakin was safe back at the castle with the other younger students.

It couldn’t have taken more than a couple of minutes to successfully corral all of the students that lingered about. It wasn’t as though any of them truly wanted to sneak off, after all. The horror on everyone’s faces spoke volumes of their concern.

Each of the prefects did their headcounts rapidly, trying not to dawdle for a moment longer than necessary, all praying they reached the same number they started with. He felt capable of breathing again when Ravenclaw reached that quota. Gryffindor prefects, it seemed, had forgotten to include themselves for a moment, which briefly induced a panic that was quickly assuaged by an irritated Mace Windu.

Perhaps it was a bit presumptuous to be relieved that Mace Windu and Kit Fisto were the supervising professors that day, but it certainly helped their odds to have experienced fighters of dark magic alongside them. The sky grew dark above them, not from the descending sun, but from the mere presence of the dementors swarming together like an ominous storm cloud.

No one looked back as they were ushered down through the storm cellar beneath Honeydukes, which remained open only at Windu’s order.

“Move quickly, don’t linger, don’t stop, don’t pause!” He ordered in a booming voice that didn’t even need to be amplified with a charm.

While Gryffindor’s prefects had nobly volunteered to lead the charge of students down and through the tunnel, the others remained on the side, performing last-minute counts to ensure all made it safely while urging them to hurry it up. No one seemed to have a problem with performing the latter, but some were getting a little rowdy in the process.

“Hey, hey, this is not an excuse to push or shove!” Satine chastised a few overeager Slytherins, “The only way this works is if you work together!”

She was right, of course, but Obi-Wan believed it was falling on deaf ears. They were terrified and rightfully so. Perhaps they shouldn’t have allowed the Hogsmeade trip to occur in the first place with everything going on. It was almost like they were trying to lure Maul in. If that was the case, it was a very sadistic choice.

Padmé Amidala as well as her friends had been some of the last people to filter in, surprisingly, and tears stained their cheeks.

“Keep it moving, ladies!” Kit Fisto ordered.

“We can’t find Rabé!” Sabé, the girl who looked most like Padmé, cried.

“I’m sure she’s here somewhere.” Windu said, “Slytherin house reported no missing students based on their earlier count. Now GO!”  

“She came later!” Padmé insisted, pushing back against the hands of Fenn Rau, who was trying to make them descend down the ladder. “We never saw her!”

“Then maybe she never came at all?” Satine tried.

“She came.” Padmé looked between both of them, “I know she did! She wouldn’t flake out on us like that. What if something horrible happened to her? What if-”

“-We can explore these possibilities back at Hogwarts.” Windu said, “If she is indeed missing, I will waste no time in coming back for her. I promise you.”

“That is already a waste of time!” Sabé protested, “What if she’s hurt?”

“I cannot risk all of you, including these prefects, for one possibly lingering student. I need to get you back to safety. The tunnels will be locked behind us.” Windu said and waved his wand to provide a gust of air, sending all of the girls down the tunnel against their own will. Satine looked horrified at the choice and frankly, so did Windu for a moment, before he began insisting the prefects follow.

For Obi-Wan, time began to slow down as his brain methodically and almost mechanically traced back through that day, desperately trying to recall if he’d seen Rabé. She stood out among Padmé’s friends in that she was the only Slytherin and yet it was still odd to see them apart. Before the alarm had turned the world on its head, it had been a rather mundane and peaceful day at Hogsmeade. The weather had been nice, if not quite nippy. He’d popped into Tomes & Scrolls with Satine while Cody lingered around Spintwitches, but none of them bought anything. If they had, surely, it would have been lost in the chaos with many other student’s purchases.

He’d debated getting a box of every flavor beans, since Hondo said he had a game of Russian Roulette, but with the beans, brewing. Cody seemed interested and it sounded like less of a consequential gaming experience than Hondo’s usual ventures. He wasn’t afforded the opportunity to go into Honeydukes, but…

Obi-Wan felt his heart stop altogether in his chest. He hadn’t gone into Honeydukes, but he almost did. And who was lingering by the butterbeer stand when he was busy deliberating with Cody?

Rabé.

He’d only caught a glimpse of her for a fraction of a second before he turned around. Clear as daylight and standing at the far end of Hogsmeade. There were other Slytherins around her, but like Padmé, her hair was always intricately woven and this made her stand out.

Where did she go so that none of her friends saw her?

“She was here today,” Obi-Wan lurched forward, grabbing Satine by the arm on instinct.

“How do you know?” She began to ask, eyes searching his own with growing concern.

“I saw her.” He said and then shoved against the stream of students that were still pouring down the tunnel.

“Ben,” It was her turn to grab him, “Wait!”

He didn’t wait, though. Instead, he slipped out of her grasp, which had been firm enough to take his robe with it, and pushed through the crowd. Windu, never the slouch, noticed him instantly and his eyes widened as he realized what Obi-Wan was trying to do. Unlike Padmé and the girls, he didn’t give him the opportunity to stop him, instead lunging forward and falling into an immediate sprint out the door- the cold wind whipping his face so hard that it caused tears to freeze in their wake.

He vaguely heard his name shouted from behind him, but he could only think of finding Rabé before it was too late. It might have been impulsive and it was definitely foolish, but he wouldn’t be able to leave with a clear conscience unless he did everything in his power to bring every student back safely. He understood that the professors needed to do their duty, but Obi-Wan was to be an auror someday. Running into the line of fire was surely a requirement of such a field.

All he could think of was how he knew what it was like to be forgotten. If there was even a small chance of preventing someone else from befalling that fate, he had to try.

Running across the slick stone walkway proved itself to be even more difficult than walking had, but Obi-Wan was utilizing the forward motion that the ice provided him for acceleration. The sky above him was almost completely black- as though Hogsmeade was at risk for being sucked into outer space. Suddenly, the cold that Obi-Wan felt no longer seemed to be as a result from the climate.

He’d studied dementors a good deal over the years and objectively understood how they drained a person from their hopes and dreams, removing the parts of them that basically made them human, but he realized then that he never really knew. He wasn’t even the target for these dementors and just being in their presence made him feel like all color was depleting from the landscape.

He forced himself through it, focusing on the task at hand and what purpose that gave him. He decided to slide by the (now closed) butterbeer stand at the end, where he’d last seen Rabé. After all, it was entirely possible that he was the last person to see her alive. That certainly didn’t give him much comfort.

He turned his head from side to side, trying with a last stitch effort to see if she’d taken refuge in one of the closed shops. The keepers were kind and would more than likely house a lost student during a crisis such as this.

As dread pooled deeper in the pit of his stomach and his body struggled to fight off the shaky chill that climbed its way up his spine, he dared to look up, noticing that the dementors were no longer searching, but swarming. The snowfall only seemed to thicken, which was rather unfortunate as Obi-Wan had to swipe his arm over his eyes several times to continue seeing.

They congregated at the Three Broomsticks- in front of which, Obi-Wan did not stop, but in his haste, did meet the bloodshot amber eyes of none other than the Dathomirian known as Maul. In their midst, Obi-Wan found he would rather embark on a lengthy stay with a dementor than look another second into the killer’s eyes. He was leaning back in his seat with casual aplomb and raised his stein of butterbeer as though in cheers or celebration, selling the chilling lack of regard for life with a cruel smile curling his black and red lips.

It was if he was saying, “I’ve won.”

Obi-Wan swallowed thickly and averted his gaze immediately, understanding that this might be his final moment. If that were so, he would use it wisely.

“No, you won’t.”

Maul’s smile broadened, resembling the actual devil as he did so.

Yes, Obi-Wan was definitely about to die.

However, the moment ended as quick as it started, for once the dementors dive bombed past Obi-Wan and straight for Maul, he flipped a galleon into the air and caught it, allowing himself to disappear to whatever rock he dragged himself from before.

Obi-Wan only thundered forward until he arrived at the end of the limits of the town, sighing deeply and wincing at the wreath of frost that circled his head as he caught his breath. He was immensely cold and with nothing to do about it and worse, began to feel quite defeated. Part of him wanted to rationalize that Rabé did likely go back to the castle. However, whether it was intuition or simply an unknown magic in the air, he could practically feel the presence of another.

Then, from the corner of his eyes, he noticed something poking out of the snow- just next to an old townhome, and drew closer. His steps were heavy and without hopeful anticipation as he regarded the gray fingers breaking through the massive snowdrift.

He knelt down slowly, and raised his wand to blow away the piles of snow and ice and used his hands to remove the last remnants on his own. Attached to the outstretched hand, which served as much as a warning as it did a signal of distress, was the petrified gray face of Rabé.

***

“You have to go back for him!” Satine demanded as she was practically carried by Fisto all the way back to Hogwarts. It had been the only way they were able to prevent her from slipping after Obi-Wan in a panic-induced gut-reaction. She believed he was an idiot for running off the way he did, but that wasn’t to say she didn’t understand the feeling.

“The dementors are mobilizing, Satine!” Windu turned on her with fire in his eyes, “Had Mr. Kenobi not been so uncharacteristically impetuous, we wouldn’t be here.”

“And there would still be a lost child out there!” She growled, not usually one to ever speak to a professor so brazenly, but this was Obi-Wan they were talking about, and she would always be a bit irrational when it came to him. “It doesn’t seem like anyone really cares about that though!”

“Not care? I would lay down my life for every single one of you. Do you think it pleases me to know that not one, but two students could be suffering at the hands of that animal on my watch?” Windu said hotly, “But I cannot jeopardize the dementors potentially catching a murderous sociopath. Obi-Wan would not want me to do that!”

She knew deep in her bones that he was right, but she didn’t take to it any better, instead feeling bile rise up her throat- only subdued by the way it seemed to constrict at the wretched thought of losing her best friend. The cold weight of pure dread settled on her chest, evaporating her fury and nearly suffocating all logical thought.

Nearly.

She turned on her heels back to Ravenclaw house, who were staring at her with a mixture of sympathy and shock. Satine knew she had the capacity to lose her patience, but she tried to always do so with some semblance of professionalism.

“We’ll go find him ourselves then!” Cody, equally as heated as she had been, raged alongside Echo and Fives. All were still dressed for the winter and had their wands at the ready.

“You will do no such thing.” Professor Fisto pulled Cody back by the arm, “Headmaster Yoda is the only one who can save your friend now.”

“What was the point of teaching us all that stuff if we aren’t going to use it?” Cody fired.

“In the event that there is an inescapable situation, Cody.” Fisto said, “I commend your bravery, but there is a line between courage and stupidity.”

“So, that’s it?” Echo chimed in, “We’re just going to run and hide every time a bad guy comes knocking on our door?”

“Yeah, you’re supposed to teach us defense against the dark arts!” Fives added, “I’d say Maul qualifies.”

“Maul is much more than any of you can understand or handle.” Windu’s voice no longer spoke with anger, but from a deep place that teetered on remorse and pity. There was a defeated look in his eyes that Satine would never forget, as though Maul had already won.

“Glad you’ve all been effectively wasting our time then.” Cody snarled, “Propping us up and making us feel as though we’re really doing something all year. What has all of this been? Some show for the Ministry?”

A few other Gryffindors pooled around him and it occurred to Satine just then that if Cody hadn’t been so set on pursuing Quidditch as a career, that he’d make a mighty fine commanding officer. People rallied behind him. They believed in him.

She just wished that call to order wasn’t coming from a place of wishing to fight a dark lord.

“Cody, I highly recommend that you stand down.” Fisto said, “I get that you’re upset, but we need to remain calm. Take your brothers back to the Great Hall and wait for further instructions.”

Cody was teeming with anger- she could tell just looking at him and for a moment, she feared he was going to act brashly. Windu seemed to think the same thing judging by the appraising look he gave him.

He didn’t move, but he did send Echo and Fives back with the Gryffindor prefects and the rest of the house. The other houses and their respective prefects trickled afterwards, each going to the Great Hall for what was surely to be another lockdown.

“Great, another sleepover.” Fives huffed as he went.

“Yeah, telling ghost stories by candlelight altogether will surely keep us safe.” Echo complained under his breath.

“I thought I said-” Fisto began.

“-I’m not leaving until Kenobi is found.” Cody said, “Dead or alive.”

“Don’t you dare talk like that.” She seethed, grabbing his attention instantly and Cody, to his credit, did appear riddled with guilt at her reaction.

“Sorry.” He muttered.

“I expect this level of irrationality from Cody.” Windu said and eyed Satine, “But not you.”

“I’m not leaving either.” She said, clutching Obi-Wan’s robe tightly between clenched fists, “Consequences be damned.”

Where she thought there would be retribution or even more yelling, there was not. Fisto, of the two of them, actually appeared more upset. Windu, instead, nodded slightly. It seemed he understood that this was a battle he would not be winning today.

Satine scanned the area, remembering someone very curious to be missing from the pack. As if it were possible, more horror gnawed at her nerves, “Where’s Anakin?”

That was Maul’s whole purpose for scouting out the school, right?

Windu grimaced, “He did try to sneak out to Hogsmeade earlier.”

Her eyes widened, “But he’s alright?”

“It is to my understanding that young Skywalker is with Professor Jinn.” Palpatine swerved around the corner, dark cloaks flowing behind him dramatically as he reconvened with the professors, “Any update on Maul?”

“No,” Windu said tartly, “But seeing as our students have been debating on staging a coup, it might have been useful to have your presence, Professor.”

The tension, as it was, seemed unbreakable.

“My apologies, Professor Windu, but I will say these students have the right to be upset. All of our efforts to protect the school have thus far failed.” Palpatine said.

Satine also couldn’t blame everyone for being upset. In their effort to make everyone feel safe, they only propped them up with delusions of grandeur. There was a fine line to walk between keeping the student body informed and propagating debilitating fear- at least in this predicament.

“You’re here now.” Fisto said, “That’s what counts.”

Satine wasn’t so sure, but then again, Maul hadn’t broken in yet.

“Surely, it’s not wise to have students so close to the entrance.” Palpatine said.

“Yes, well, it also wasn’t wise to allow Anakin so close to your Vitamix potion.” Windu countered, “I guess we’re all doing things a bit differently right now.”

Palpatine seemed properly slapped by that, because there was little argument that could be brought up to counter the comment. That was, indeed, what happened and it left the school wide open for possible attack.

“Yoda should be back any minute.” Fisto paced the floor, his wet boots making a squeaking noise as he did so, “And hopefully, he has good news.”

“If not?” Cody asked.

“If not, we might have to help him and if that’s the case, you two will stay back.” Windu ordered.

Even Cody didn’t argue with that logic.

Not but a moment later, erratic banging came from the metal door, growing more desperate as the seconds went on. Palpatine leaned forward as if to open it and Fisto grabbed his wrist before he could perform the charm.

“There’s a password.” Fisto said.

“And why would Maul just come knocking on the front door?” Palpatine scoffed.

“Maul is anything but conventional.” Windu reasoned.

Cody and Satine looked between each other as the three professors deliberated. They were beginning to understand why it sometimes felt like it took forever for anything to get done. No one could agree on the simplest things.

“What if it’s Ben?” Satine stepped forward, “You’ve said it yourself that the tunnels are blocked off now.”

“Yoda would have found him and brought him back by apparition.” Fisto said.

“And if he didn’t?”

Windu opened his mouth to respond, but then from a familiar voice, “HELLO THERE? IS ANYONE THERE?”

She glared between the three professors, who were all a bit dumbstruck as they hastily moved to open the door. As it swung open unceremoniously, her heart resumed beating as Obi-Wan Kenobi, pale, drenched and speckled with snowflakes, practically fell through the entryway.

She moved on instinct rather than thought and caught him in a tight hug, combatting the sharp chill that traveled up her spine at his frigid body with the warm relief that he was alive. She only removed herself enough to tightly wrap his robe around his shoulders before pulling him closer.

“Get him some blankets!” Windu ordered while Palpatine was simultaneously brewing a warm beverage from thin air. Satine, for her part, could not let go.

“N-nice t-to see you t-too.” He shivered and did not reject the warm contact.

“You’re an idiot, Obi-Wan Kenobi.” She muttered into his shoulder, but it really didn’t have as much fire as she would have liked it to- not when he looked so pitiful with wet hair in his face, teeth chattering, and a nose and cheeks red from the cold.

“I’m aware.” He said.

“You could have been killed!”

“I know.”

“And you really couldn’t have at least brought your robe with you if you were going to go running off on a deadly mission?”

“You’re right.”

“Stop agreeing with me!” She leaned back and glared at him.

“My apologies,” He smiled ruefully, but it faded almost instantly, “All the trouble I’ve caused, I’m afraid it was for nothing.”

“What do you mean?” Fisto cut in.

“I saw him.” Obi-Wan’s voice was hollow when he said it. His eyes became downcast as he reminisced, “And Rabé. I couldn’t move her on my own… She was frozen in carbonite.”

Windu cursed, scrubbing a hand over his bald head, “And Maul?”

“Gone.” Obi-Wan said, “He used a portkey before the dementors could get to him.”

***

The dementors separated like parting clouds, allowing for remnants of dwindling sunlight to cast a yellow beam onto Hogsmeade. Even with the sunset behind it, the usually buzzing and quaint town looked barren without the lively folk that inhabited it. It was to their best interest to hide, of course, and he knew that once this awful storm passed, they would return again. Yoda moved slowly through the snow, feet unbothered by the crunch of the ice beneath him.

He had no doubt that Maul was here, but held equal assurance that he no longer was. His protective charms were supposed to stop people from getting in, not out.

He grimaced as he knelt to the Slytherin girl’s motionless body- frozen in time with a horrific expression painting her features. She would need to join the growing group that took up beds in Madame Nema’s hospital wing. He just hoped with everything in him that they could make this right.

It tugged at his heart that children always seemed to be the ones to suffer for the choices of adults. This one was not excluded as Yoda and the other professors deemed that it would be safe.

It should have been safe.

He cursed as he thought back to the extensive lengths he’d gone to in protecting the school. He was exhausted, constantly firing off on all cylinders to keep this place safe. Even Hogsmeade hadn’t been exempt from his reach.

Well it had, but it seemed the small window of Maul’s murder in Diagon Alley to Yoda waking up from the botched Vitamix potion was the hole he’d crawled through. The dementors hadn’t detected him, which was a whole other concern that he would need to investigate at a later time.

There were so many ways that they failed.

Yes, well, this girl’s parents will not enjoy a meager response like that, so he ought to think of something better. Either way, he would not be sleeping well for his hubris. Maul might not storm the castle with his being there, but he was not above dancing around it. He was boxed out for now, but there was only so much that could be done. He had managed to convince them to disallow apparition for the time being without Ministry approval. This combined with the monitorization of the Floo network, limited Maul significantly.

However, there were always portkeys, which was the most secure way for a person in hiding to quickly transport. You didn’t need a license for it and you didn’t even leave a trace on your wand in the process.

It seemed Maul was getting significant joy from toying with them by instilling fear. It was just like a dark wizard to play on people’s emotions as such.

And yet…

He looked back down at the girl with a different sort of befuddlement. Not that he was complaining, but why hadn’t he killed her? Was it because it would have drawn too much attention for his liking? That didn’t seem right, though, because he had no problem murdering the guards at Azkaban or that store owner on Diagon Alley. Why utilize this mysterious alternative method now?

It hadn’t been the first time, obviously. There was the first official occurrence in December, not to mention the carbon remnants found in Shmi Skywalker’s flat, and Obi-Wan and Satine’s discovery at the Shrieking Shack.

Maul had certainly developed a predilection for the long con in his time locked away in Azkaban. Yoda would say it was out of character if he didn’t understand how much a man could change from trauma. He’d seen it in his own face and he’d seen it in many other’s. Maul didn’t want to mess up this time. He wanted his target and he wanted it done right.

But why Anakin Skywalker? Surely, Maul didn’t buy into the Chosen One prophecy. And if he did, why the sudden malevolence towards the boy? Nothing from the ancient texts seemed to make any reference to Maul in the slightest. It wouldn’t have affected him in Azkaban.

Would it?

As Yoda waved his wand once to lift the casket of carbon from the ground to float aimlessly behind him, he turned back towards the castle, realizing not for the first time that the more he learned, the more he had to ask.

***

“We were worried you became a popsicle out there,” Cody said as he took off his own robe and coat to also wrap around Obi-Wan. They all sat in the Great Hall with the rest of the student body, each positioned on their own sleeping bag as they faced each other. Despite having been inside for over an hour, Obi-Wan still clutched the blankets that were given to him tightly and didn’t reject Cody’s addition to the pile.

“I’m sure he was more concerned about seeing Maul.” Satine said.

“I’m sure he was.” Ventress sauntered by with her trademark smirk painted on her black-stained lips.

“Come off it, Ventress,” Cody scowled, “Kenobi wouldn’t lie about such a thing. Dementors were there too.”

“They’ve been here the entire time, Fett.” Ventress said, “How many false scares have there been? I’m beginning to believe it’s all conspiracy, myself.”

“It’s that level of thinking that’s going to get someone seriously injured.” Satine said, “Or worse.”

“Maybe then someone will start to take legitimate action,” She sighed almost dreamily, like she was fantasizing about the possibility.

“And I suppose Rabé basically turning to stone was just nothing.” Cody barked.

“A pity, truly.” She inspected her fingernails, which were actually quite noticeably jagged and cracked with chipped black polish, “Have we not noticed that every victim has been pureblood? You don’t hear the Ministry talking about that, of course.”

“What are you getting at?” Satine growled.

“I’m just saying, Duchess,” Ventress displayed her best pout, which coming from her, still had all the appearances of a cat ready to pounce, “I would hate to see a group marginalized by their blood type.”

“Listen here, Ventress-” She clutched his sleeping bag tightly and was surely ready to fire off on a meaningful tangent of her own, but was interrupted by the sound of barreling footsteps coming their way.

Anakin and Rex came sprinting down the aisle and slid onto their knees towards where they sat. Anakin, for his part, skidded right into Obi-Wan and nearly knocked him over by the velocity at which he traveled.

“Where have you two been?” Cody asked.

“We were with Qui-Gon!” Anakin said and looked around to Obi-Wan, “Fives just told us about what happened at Hogsmeade and I wanted to make sure you were okay.”

Obi-Wan’s heart melted at the thought of Anakin’s concern and ruffled his hair, “Not a scratch on me.”

Anakin nodded in relief, “That’s good. It’s crazy that we both saw Maul today and he didn’t even do anything to either of us!”

Obi-Wan, Satine, Cody, and the briefly forgotten Ventress all snapped their attention towards Anakin in surprise.

“I’m sorry, what?” Satine was the first to speak.

“When and where did you see Maul?” Cody followed shortly behind.

“And you lived?” It was unclear whether Ventress was surprised or disappointed.

Obi-Wan, in all fairness, was still processing the small twelve year old boy, who presumably alone, faced the bloodthirsty killer that had it out for him. He knew he must have looked horrified, because Anakin’s own worry seemed to grow by just looking at Obi-Wan.

“I’m okay!” He said first, knowing that this was the most important thing, “And for the record, it wasn’t my fault.”

“It was a little your fault.” Rex winced.

“Rex! You’re supposed to be on my side!” Anakin whined.

“What did you do?” Obi-Wan pinched his brow.

“I already told Qui-Gon and he promised me immunity and while I don’t know for sure what that means, I’m pretty sure it means you’re not allowed to get mad.”

“That’s not what it means.” He said.

“Well, then, who’s got a decent ghost story to share?” He tried, looking around to each of them, “Ventress? I’m sure you’ve got some just by looking in a mirror every day.”

“Anakin…”

“Fine…” He sighed, “I… Might have sort of tried to go give Padmé her Valentine.”

“Of all the foolish and impulsive things to do!” Obi-Wan roared instantly.

“You said you wouldn’t get mad!”

“No I did not!” He snapped, “Do you not realize how incredibly dangerous that was? And the kind of risk you were putting yourself at? What would have happened if he had gotten you? I swear, I know you’re young but you need to think in terms of the long-”

“-Mate, not sure you are in the best position to be giving that lecture today.” Cody said, “Seeing as you also ran right into Maul’s clutches.”

“Yeah, really!” Anakin defended, “I heard all about what you did!”

“To save someone!” Obi-Wan rounded on his friend, “Not to retrieve a pretty trinket for a girl I fancy!”

“Based on your taste that’s a good thing.” Ventress scoffed.

Satine, who was admittedly calmer than Obi-Wan, frowned and looked at Anakin, “What happened?”

“If I’m allowed to continue.” He said pointedly before going on, “I wasn’t actually going to go to Hogsmeade. Believe it or not, I’m not completely stupid.”

“You just said-” Obi-Wan’s voice cracked.

“-Ben, let him finish.” Satine admonished.

“Thank you,” Anakin nodded and the kid really had the nerve to look smug, “I wasn’t going to Hogsmeade, but Rabé was and believe it or not, I get nervous too sometimes. I wasn’t sure I would have the nerve to give it to her in person, so I was going to ask Rabé if she could give it to Padmé for me. So, I used the map to follow her, obviously, and was never going to leave the tunnel system. But then about halfway through, I saw him.”

“Maul?” Cody asked in awe.

“No, the boogeyman. Yes, Maul.” Rex rolled his eyes.

“Seems like the same thing to me,” Ventress yawned, clearly unimpressed, “Seeing as Maul can’t be in two places at once, I would say one of you is lying.”

“I’m not lying!” Anakin asserted and looked to Obi-Wan, “And he’s not either.”

“Rabé didn’t just turn to carbonite on her own.” Obi-Wan said.

Anakin’s eyes widened, “He got Rabé too?”

“What do you mean too?” Satine asked.

“I mean, Tiplee was also frozen in carbonite down in the tunnels. I only managed to get away because I must have caught him off guard. I ran as fast as I could.” He patted his pockets, “Dang! I think I dropped the map in the process. Again.”

“Seriously, no more of those for you.” Satine said.

“Not like it’ll be of much use now that Yoda is closing the tunnels again.” Cody said.

“That’s horrible.” Obi-Wan frowned and stroked his chin thoughtfully, “But I wonder why he wouldn’t have come into the school.”

“He’s afraid of Yoda.” Ventress scowled, “Everyone knows that, but clearly, he’s a fool to be leaving all of these little clues around.”

“There’s got to be a bigger plan at play here.” Satine said.

“Like what? Two Maul’s?” Ventress rolled her eyes, “I could see the creep going after Skywalker as that is clearly his primary intent, but Kenobi? Who would bother to go after someone who cowered at his own shadow at one point?”

The particular incident that Ventress was alluding to happened when they were only five years old, he might add, but even in his head it didn’t pack the same impact that she wanted it to. Instead, Obi-Wan flashed her a disapproving look.

“Rabé is a member of your house.” He pointed out, “I didn’t see you running back to save her.”

“Actually, I didn’t see you at all.” Satine added.

Ventress, nonplussed, rolled her eyes dramatically, “Good to know the two of you are still conjuring nonsense that would rival The Quibbler, but if you must know, I was tutoring in the library.”

“Wait a second,” Obi-Wan allowed some of the blanket to slide off of him when he sat up straighter, trying his best to suppress a shiver that immediately followed. He was grateful that Satine set it back into place, “Don’t tell me you’re Hondo’s tutor.”

Ventress furrowed her brow, “Be wary of the tone, Kenobi. My marks often rival your own.”

She wasn’t wrong. Horrible personality aside, Ventress was an exemplary student. Like him, she sort of had to be, given the reputation their respective families upheld.

“I wasn’t underestimating your intelligence,” He said, because he wasn’t a total fool, “But I never took you for a good samaritan.”

“Surely, he’s paying her.” Satine groaned as she leaned back on her hands.

“I don’t need the money, muggle-born.” She hissed.

“Since when has galleons been his only form of currency?” Satine shrugged, “Everyone has a price, is all I’m saying.”

“Fools,” Ventress shook her head as she walked away, “All of you.”

“Yeah, well, when you turn to stone, it’ll match your heart.” Anakin said and stood up, “I’m going to go apologize to Padmé.”

Obi-Wan watched him sadly as he walked over to where the crestfallen group of usually chipper girls huddled together. At least they were able to comfort each other in this trying time. Obi-Wan looked to Cody and Satine, who were both wearing a considerable amount of concern on their features.

He knew their responsibilities as older students and prefects, alike, were only going to rise as the fear and sense of danger increased. Anakin had nearly come to his end if he hadn’t been so quick on his feet. He supposed those dueling classes did have their uses if implemented properly. As it were, Maul would likely not make the same mistake twice.

***

The atmosphere was much more subdued than most Quidditch mornings. Even Cody found himself sitting quietly across from where Obi-Wan was falling asleep over a plate of pancakes. Ventress was the only one not subdued, she was glaring around at her team, snarling at anyone not paying attention to her. He didn’t think she’d get very far with an attitude like that. As captain, sometimes the best thing you could do was read the mood of your teammates.

Obi-Wan’s head dropped forwards almost landing in the syrup before Satine managed to pull him back without even a glance over. He blinked, looking around like he hadn’t even been aware they were in the Great Hall in the first place.

“Might want to eat something, mate,” Cody suggested, gesturing to his plate that he seemed surprised was loaded even if he had done it himself.

“Right,” He did so without another word. Satine looked fairly volatile this morning, having woken up extremely early for a morning patrol so there wasn’t much conversation for them to be had. He was tired too, having been picking up a few patrols of his own. Palpatine’s accidental sleeping potion may have been an unfortunate idea, but a few extra hands that could take on prefect duties were still welcomed. It’s not like Cody could say no after watching his friends be run ragged.

“You sure you’re going to be awake enough to stay on a broom?” Cody asked as they both watched a piece of pancake fall slowly off his fork. Obi-Wan just nodded looking up with a sigh.

“We’re all tired,” He nodded towards where Koth had passed out at the breakfast table. Aayla and Cin were awake enough to doodle on his face so it maybe wasn’t the entire team, “Hopefully this will make for a short game.”

“Hopefully,” He nodded, but he wasn’t sure he was honest in his statement. Ventress was looking especially poisonous this morning and wouldn’t take anything sitting down, “Maybe we shouldn’t be playing anyways.”

Obi-Wan and Satine both looked at him like he’d just grown a second head and he met their looks with a glare.

“Who are you and what have you done with Cody?” Kenobi squinted at him as if checking to make sure he hadn’t been cursed.

“I think hell must have frozen over,” Satine added with a nod, “I never thought I’d hear Cody Fett, not want anything to do with Quidditch.”

“Hey! Woah!” He shook his head quickly, “I never said that.”

They both raised an eyebrow at him and he rolled his eyes.

“Even I am not enough of a sports fan to look past the elephant in the room,” He jabbed his fork at them, “Maul’s close and we’re just going to take the whole school outside? Again? Plus, morale is down,” Instead of gesturing to the two obvious examples in front of him, he pointed to Koth, who had just woken up and hadn’t figured out why everyone was laughing at him yet.

“When you put it that way...” Obi-Wan flicked his eyes to the professors, who were desperately trying to keep warm inviting facades. He took a sip of pumpkin juice.

“Why go through all this trouble for such a barbaric game anyways,” Satine glowered, “We need a break from potential violence not more.”

Cody knew explaining the dynamics of Quidditch would not change her mind any so he kept his own thoughts to himself on the matter. He thought of Quidditch as a much needed break most of the time. But it was hard to deny the fact that only a few people would be having a good time today and that wasn’t how he felt a healthy Quidditch environment should be.

The screech of an owl alerted everyone to the arrival of the morning mail. It was always a little hectic, but it didn’t stop them from being able to spot one of their three owls if it chose to show up. The only owl Cody could recognize was a large tawny one. Well manicured and, if memory served, sharp talons. Obi-Wan barely avoided getting his letter dropped on his head, his hand flicked up to catch the falling parchment with deft precision. As most letters from his parents, he was careful to shield it so Satine couldn’t see, something that always had her frustrated despite knowing that it was fair given the nature of these letters.

Obi-Wan read the whole thing in lightning speed, eyebrows furrowing the further he got, although he nodded before swiftly depositing it on the table next to his plate. His owl swooped down again landing on his head causing him to wince.

“Alright message received,” He tried to pick up the pesky owl, but it looked rather indignant to be manhandled. Still because he was gentle and fed him a bit of breakfast, the owl allowed itself to be set on his arm, “Tell them they’re early,” He tried saying it quietly enough so neither of them would hear, unfortunately they were both rather intune to his voice. If an owl could show emotions, which Cody had, up until this moment thought untrue, Obi-Wan’s owl would look almost melancholic for a moment. A hard thing to do for a bird that had permanent angry eyebrows colored into its feathers.

It took off in a hurry, nearly taking off a few heads as it went and disappeared back into the flock it had arrived with.

“What did they say?” Satine asked, as she usually did, but he just shrugged.

“Nothing out of the ordinary,” He gave her a smile, but she frowned.

“That never makes me feel better,” She told him sternly. He just shrugged.

There was a loud pop and they all looked up to see Palpatine and Qui-Gon standing at the head of the Great Hall, the two of them would be escorting both teams outside and to the pitch. It was best to have an experienced teacher at the helm and who better than those who had earned their titles as Heads of House.

Obi-Wan stood swiftly, accepting their well wishes and good lucks, before falling into line behind Eeth. Satine was watching them leave with narrowed eyes and Cody wasn’t sure what was going on, but she certainly looked much more focused than earlier. She slid her hand across the table, snatching the note from where he’d left it, clearly for the trash pile, and spread it open.

“Should you do that?” He asked even if he was curious himself, he wasn’t about to get accused of reading other people’s mail.

“It’s a suspicious piece of parchment I found unattended,” She lied as she peered down at it. Her nose scrunched up in disgust as she read it just loud enough for him to hear.

“Obi-Wan Kenobi,

As you are about to turn 17, we remind you once again of your duties and expectations. In one year you will turn 18 and we’ll discuss then your future. Despite your best attempts to undermine our plans we will do what we can to work around your failure.

Don’t expect a gift this year, you received one last year and we’ll be happy to give you one when you turn 20. Consider continuing to go to school despite your constant disappointments gift enough.

-Mother”

Cody felt the grip on his fork tighten as he stared a hole through the paper. A correspondence with Obi-Wan’s family really was never pleasant, but did they have to be so outwardly despicable? What surprised him most was the excitement lighting up Satine’s eyes as she read the letter over again.

“Brilliant!” She grinned and he practically snapped his fork in half.

“What’s so brilliant about those two bastards continuing to tighten the noose around his neck?” Cody growled and Satine looked up, having the decency to look aghast.

“Oh heavens no,” She looked sick at the thought, “That’s not what I was referring to at all. How could you think-?”

“-How could I not? Maybe hell is freezing over,” He ran a hand down his face as she rummaged around in her bag before shoving plates and goblets out of the way, nearly toppling a few over. She set down a massive book-like object with a white exterior and silver rings. It was full to the brim with pages and she opened it up excitedly.

“It’s a binder,” She told him at his look before moving on to what must have been the important thing at hand, “You know how Ben’s rather dodgy about his birthday?” Cody nodded, “Well I’ve been tracking him ever since 2nd year,” She flipped around in the binder and Cody could see so many color-coded graphs it made his head spin.

“You did this? For what?”

“If he won’t tell us, I’ll find out on my own,” She glared sternly at a picture of Ben that blinked up at her from the page, “That’s what I told him,” She flipped through it, pointing at various sections, “I was able to surmise that his parents tend to have a letter pattern. They only send him mail on major holidays or if he’s done something they disapprove of.”

“When is that not the case,” He muttered.

“I was able to narrow it down after a few years to February or March,” She was in the back of the book now where a calendar full of crossed out dates sat, “It was confusing, sometimes they sent him a letter end of February like this one,” She waved the letter at him, “Sometimes it was in March. This is the first time I’ve been able to read one,” She grinned proudly tucking the letter into the back pocket for evidence purposes.

“What good does that do? They didn’t say what day it was,” Cody studied the calendar in interest.

“It does a lot of good!” She pulled a fancy highlighter from her bag, “He said they were early, meaning it can’t be any of these dates,” She ran her finger through most of the month. They only had a few days left until March though, maybe she’d figured out the month, “Most importantly!” She looked at him face as serious as it was when she was taking her OWLs, “They said they got him a gift last year-”

“Yeah a ruddy gift,” Cody frowned, “What good is an antique quill if it doesn’t even work?”

“I agree,” She said impatiently, “That’s not the point. They said they’d get him another one when he turned 20. He turned 16 last year-”

“Your point?” Cody was beginning to get lost and would rather she hurry up her point than leave him thinking.

“He doesn’t have a birthday this year at all!” She announced and Cody straightened, staring at her in shock.

“Well that’s not possible!” He declared, “Everyone has a birthday once a year! Even those who don’t care much like Kenobi.”

“It is possible!” She grinned proudly drawing a line on her calendar right between the 28th of February and the 1st of March, “He was born on February 29th! A leap year!”

Cody blinked. That actually made a lot of sense. Kenobi wasn’t a liar and he was sure he’d asked about specific days and been told he was wrong. He’d only seen Kenobi get a birthday present their first year (a pack of gobstones) and their fifth year (the aforementioned broken antique quill). Cody had just figured they wouldn’t ever figure it out unless he told them himself, so he usually just tried to get him a good Christmas present every year. He had noticed Satine had started to give him a present around this time of year, but now they had the exact day.

“Does this mean his parents use that as an excuse to never get him anything?” He frowned and Satine angered instantly.

“I’m almost shocked they haven’t forgotten the date themselves.”

“So,” Cody looked at the little highlighted line indicating the fruition of 5 years of work, “What are we doing about it?”

***

“I still say we should have gone with March 1st,” Cody said from where he was balanced rather precariously on a ladder taping the end of a streamer, “Then we’d be celebrating him having turned 17.”

Satine, who was holding onto the ladder to make sure she didn’t have to take anyone to the hospital wing today, glared up at him, “Absolutely not! He has a February birthday, we’re celebrating it in February. Otherwise he’s going to assume we’ve forgotten it!”

“He doesn’t even know we know it,” Cody rationalized, but came down from the ladder anyways to admire his work with her.

“Alright,” She looked down reading her list. She’d had years to plan this event, he’d never had a party before that she knew of and she wanted it to be perfect, “We’ve got the streamers and the balloons. The guests have been told what time to arrive...” She checked off the boxes as she went, “Can I trust you to go and get the cake without dropping it?” She looked up at her friend and he grinned giving her a thumbs up.

“Oh yeah definitely,” It didn’t instill in her a lot of hope, but he was at least eager to do it.

“Alright go, but hurry!” She checked the time off the clock in the corner. “They’ll be here soon.”

“On it!” He saluted her and raced out the door.

Satine observed her surroundings once more. They’d chosen an empty classroom rather than something elaborate like the Great Hall or too intimate like Qui-Gon’s office. She’d gotten approval, Qui-Gon was to arrive any minute now to supervise. He’d been the only professor she could think of that would understand how important this was to do. She was sure if she’d talked to Windu or even Headmaster Yoda, she’d have gotten shot down before she even began. Qui-Gon knew about Ben’s family though and like her, seemed to want to give him the best experience he could.

There was a spot for the cake on the teacher’s desk as well as plates, utensils, and napkins. The ceiling was practically drowning in streamers of all different colors and balloons were floating around aimlessly. Her and Cody’s presents to him were sitting in a neat pile on a couple of tables pushed together. She hoped he’d get a few more, but hadn’t explicitly said anything on the invitations. It was rather short notice after all.

“You’ve done a wonderful job,” She turned to see Qui-Gon in the doorway. He was holding a colorfully wrapped package which she gratefully took from him placing it on the table next to the other.

“Do you think it’s too much?” The last thing she wanted to do was overwhelm him, but she’d learned over the years it was hard to figure out what would.

“I’m sure we could all do with a little cheeriness,” He said in lieu of answering. Maybe he didn’t know any better than she did.

It didn’t take much more time before the students she’d invited began to arrive. The entirety of the Ravenclaw Quidditch team poured in along with Stass. They’d been a little downtrodden at being beat so terribly by Slytherin, but seemed happy enough to be there. The clones were the next to arrive with Anakin in tow. Anakin proudly added his gift to the stack before going back over to Rex.

Cody arrived again, loudly kicking in the door gingerly holding the cake. It hadn’t gotten squashed which she was thankful for. Behind him was Breha and Bail, both levitating trays of food and a bowl of punch, letting them settle into place on a row of desks.

More prefects appeared as well as a few other students. Hondo had seemed rather pleased to have been invited, but Satine was a little worried about what he had possibly brought as a present. Soon the room was pretty full and Satine shushed everyone as well as she could without shouting.

“Alright I’m going to get Ben,” She announced, “Be ready.”

“Yes ma’am!” The Fett’s all saluted her and the others in the room nodded keeping their chatter to a minimum.

***

Obi-Wan was growing a little concerned. Satine had been the one to ask him to meet her in the library, but she had yet to appear. He’d kept himself occupied with his textbooks, but he was tempted to go out and look for her. It was no sooner than he closed his textbook and stood that she rounded the corner looking rather flustered.

“Sorry I’m late,” She panted as she flipped her hair back and out of her face. It was down today, which was becoming a bit of a rarity and he smiled.

“It’s no trouble,” He said sitting back down, “Was there something in particular you wanted to work on? I’ve already finished my essays, but I can help you with yours.”

“Actually,” She was fidgeting nervously and he gazed up at her in concern, “I was hoping you wouldn’t mind if we went on a walk first.”

“A walk?” That was an unusual request.

“Yes I- I just think it would be nice, don’t you?” Well, he was hard pressed to deny her anything. Especially something as simple as a walk around the castle.

“Alright,” He agreed, sliding his text book back into his bag. She was scrutinizing him and he looked down to make sure his clothes were straightened, because the last time he’d gotten that look his fly had been undone. Rather embarrassing.

He looked up again, starting in surprise, when he felt a hand in his hair. She gave him an apologetic look as she stepped back.

“Sorry, your hair was messed up,” She told him and he felt his face warm slightly, but she just coughed awkwardly and started walking. He ran to catch up.

He couldn’t help, but to run his own hands through his hair, just to ensure that it wasn’t still a mess, “It’s fine Ben,” She told him as she walked just far enough ahead to force him to follow her path.

“I didn’t think you minded much if it was messy,” He said instead of removing his hands.

“I don’t, I just-” Satine cut herself off with a shake of her head. Obi-Wan was confused, but let his hands finally drop to his sides.

“Well alright?” He wasn’t sure what else to say. She was acting off and he couldn’t pinpoint it. Maybe she was upset? But she didn’t look it. Even if she was, the library was perfectly quiet that evening. His heart beat a little faster in his chest as he remembered another time the two of them had been alone, the Christmas party. Did she- were they going to talk about it? He wasn’t sure he knew what to say about such things.

“Ben?” He looked up at his name and she was frowning at him, “Are you alright? You look pale.”

“I’m completely fine,” He confirmed, “Are you?”

“Yes?” Maybe they were both acting a little off this evening.

“Good,” He smiled at her and she returned it easily.

She turned then and walked towards the door of an empty classroom, disappearing inside. What on earth could she want with him in an empty classroom?

He refused to lose her though and quickened his pace until he was pulling the door open only to be assaulted by many loud cheers. It took him a moment to register what they were saying in the first place.

“Happy Birthday!”

His birthday? He blinked, taking in the scene. Many of his close friends were there, his Quidditch team, Anakin, Qui-Gon. All of them were standing there watching him which made him more than a little nervous. The ceiling was decorated in nearly every color of the rainbow and it was complete with balloons. He gripped the strap of his bag, unsure what was expected of him. He certainly had never had a party for himself before.

“Happy Birthday, mate!” Cody appeared in front of him practically dragging him into the room and pushing him towards the professor’s desk. It broke the tension in the room and chatter resumed much to his relief. There were less eyes on him.

“Uhm, thank you,” He managed a smile.

“Look at your cake! We had it made special.”

He looked down in surprise at a white cake decorated with 17 silver candles. Written in delicate blue icing was, “Happy Birthday Obi-Wan!” He’d never had his own birthday cake before, but he’d seen them when Satine or Cody had celebrated theirs. It was kind of them to think of him, he just wished he knew the proper way to respond. The parties he attended usually had scripts to follow and he had never been instructed for one like this.

“It’s chocolate,” Satine’s hand landed right next to his on the desk and he looked up catching her eyes, “I know it’s your favorite.”

“It is,” he agreed almost solemnly.

“Do you like it?” She asked and he nodded quickly, his face heating up, how rude that he hadn’t immediately offered them a thank you.

“Yes of course! I- Thank you,” He told them both seriously, “I’m sorry, I’m just not at all sure how I’m supposed to react.” Satine’s eyes flashed sadly at him for a moment before it was gone and she smiled at him softly, bumping her fingers into his.

“You can react however you’d like,” She assured him, “Yell at me that you hate it for all I care,” He took a step back and nearly tripped over Cody at the insinuation.

“Absolutely not, I’ll treasure it!” He vowed with a stern expression and she laughed a little, it was a sound he quite liked.

“Don’t treasure it too long,” Cody warned him, “Because after we sing to you we’re all going to eat it.”

“Sing?”

Neither of them answered, but he found himself pushed into the professor’s chair and everyone seemed to gather all around him. He felt his face get warm and he hoped it wasn’t too noticeable. Both Cody and Satine were lighting the candles on the cake and right when they were done a rather off-key rendition of “Happy Birthday” was sung and shouted at him. There wasn’t much for him to do except sit there and try to look less uncomfortable. When Fives and Echo finally finished drawing out the last “you” Satine told him to make a wish and gestured for him to blow out the candles. It took him two attempts and he wondered if he looked as foolish as he felt.

Soon, however, everyone was preoccupied with their slices of cake and mingling with one another. Obi-Wan had to admit despite his embarrassment of having so many eyes on him, the cake was rather good. It was certainly his favorite kind from the Great Hall and he was quietly delighted when Satine offered him another piece.

“You know today’s not my birthday,” He told Satine as she sat down next to him cutting into her own slice.

“I know,” She smirked, “I know that your birthday isn’t today or tomorrow, but is actually February 29th. Despite what anyone else may say about this though, is that it’s still worth celebrating even if the day won’t appear again for a few more years.”

He blinked at her, shocked. He knew she’d been interested in figuring out his birthday, but he had assumed she’d dropped it by now, “How did you find out?”

“Years of observation,” It wasn’t a helpful answer, but he had to admire her intelligence in getting this far, “So am I right?” She leaned in close to him, her eyes searching his for the answer.

“Yes,” He answered quietly.

“Kenobi!” Hondo nearly knocked him into his cake when he slapped him on the back, “Why have you not shared your birthday with me before! Hondo gives fabulous presents that one would not wish for in their wildest dreams!”

“Ah thank you Hondo,” He peeled Hondo’s arm off his shoulders. He was fairly sure Hondo was correct in his assumption that he definitely wouldn’t have wished for whatever lurked in Hondo’s present in any of his dreams.

“You’re welcome, my friend! Only the best for one of my closest associates,” He winked at him before waltzing away back into the crowd. Obi-Wan watched him go as Satine stifled her laughter.

“I assumed you’d want to open your presents later?” She asked.

“I have presents?” He looked around the room until he spotted them and blanched. There had to be at least 10 sitting there in a pile just for him, “I can’t accept that,” He looked at her with wide eyes and she narrowed her eyes.

“It would be ruder for you to reject them,” He looked between her and the presents. A catch 22.

“I’m not opening Hondo’s in front of anyone,” He decided and she laughed again.

Suddenly there was a loud crash and they both looked up to see Anakin sprawled out on the floor. Obi-Wan’s heart flew into his throat thinking of a similar event at the last party he’d gone to at this school. Before he could run over there though, Anakin was sitting up with a dopey smile on his face. He giggled.

Obi-Wan let out a sigh of relief, but something still didn’t seem right. Anakin had Qui-Gon’s help to stand up, but he wobbled. He looked a little bit like he was drunk, but he doubted Satine or Cody would spike the punch at his birthday party. Cody seemed to have a similar guess because he took a sip of his own punch and frowned.

“Don’t you think,” Anakin giggled so hard he almost fell down again, “Don’t you think that Miraj Scintel is the most beautiful girl you’ve ever met?”

The room went silent.

“She’s really beautiful,” He said again giggling wildly. He tripped and Qui-Gon just barely managed to catch him.

Half the room broke out into laughter, it was a ridiculous sight, but Obi-Wan was more worried about what the cause of this was. Qui-Gon was too and immediately slapped a cookie out of Hondo’s hand.

“Someone’s snuck a love potion in,” Satine said standing up, looking particularly mad.

“Miraj Scintel by the sound of it,” Cin Drallig raised an eyebrow as they all quietly set their food down.

“Must have been after you Kenobi,” Fives pointed out, “After all this is technically your party.”

“Me?” He barely talked to the girl and found her quite detestable, they were as different as they came.

“It’s possible any of you were the target,” Qui-Gon frowned as he picked up Anakin to keep him from getting anywhere.

“Hey put me down! I need to go tell Miraj Scintel that I love her!” Anakin cried, “Rex, do you think she’ll like me back.”

Rex was looking at Anakin as if he were contagious, but he just gave him an awkward nod and a, “Sure mate.”

“I’ll take him to Madam Nema,” He told everyone and gave a steady gaze at Obi-Wan, “He’ll be fine. In the meantime I’m sorry, but it looks like we’ll have to cut this party short.”

Before long the room had thinned out leaving just Obi-Wan, Satine, Cody, and a mess to clean up.

“You don’t have to help, Ben,” Satine said with a sigh as she pulled out her wand, “It’s your birthday after all.”

“And leave you to do all the work? I don’t think so,” He stood beside her as they both pulled the streamers off the ceiling with their wands. Cody made short work of sending all their food back down to the kitchens. The three of them moved the desks back to where they were meant to before collapsing together at a section of desks in the center of the room.

“Who knew a party would be so much work?” Cody complained as he picked a bit of streamer out of his hair.

“I did,” Obi-Wan answered quietly, “I really appreciate the thought, but I’m not sure I like having all the attention on me.”

“The point of a birthday party is just to be around those that love you,” She told him, “Yeah it’s a little embarrassing being sung too or opening presents, but there are some things in life you just have to accept.”

“I’m not sure,” He would really rather not make such a big fuss about something as mundane as the day he was born. Satine gave him a rather scathing look for a moment before sighing deeply and reaching into her bag.

“Do you remember when I was late coming back to school?” She asked them.

“Only every day,” He complained and Cody just nodded. She sized them both up before pulling out her wallet and, as if it was physically painful for her she pulled out a thin white card.

“I was late because I was getting my driver’s license,” She set the card down in front of them, revealing Satine in rather bad lighting. On the right was a list of identifying information and quite interested, Obi-Wan picked it up to look at it.

Cody immediately had broken into a fit of laughter, catching the end of Satine’s fiery glare, “It looks like a mug shot!”

“That’s why I wasn’t too interested in telling anyone!” She snatched the card out of his hands and Obi-Wan just blinked looking over at her.

“What’s wrong with it? You look lovely,” That comment just made Cody laugh harder and earned him Satine’s glare as well.

“It’s a bloody terrible photo!” She shouted shoving the thing far back in her wallet and stashing it back where it belonged, “The point is,” She emphasized, “Sometimes you have to suffer through some embarrassment in life, I doubt having a birthday party is as terrible as having that as an identifying picture.”

“I don’t see what’s so bad about it,” He looked between Cody and Satine. It showcased her hair and although she wasn’t smiling, in it he could see the softness in her eyes.

“You are unbelievable, Obi-Wan Kenobi!” Satine’s face had gone red, “I show you the worst picture of me forced to exist and you still think being sung too is worse?”

“Let’s open presents!” Cody changed the subject quickly, shoving a shoddily wrapped gift into his hands and trying to whisper, “Come on mate, open it! She already has a mugshot, what’s going to stop her from murdering us.”

“Cody!”