#not gluten free (unless you use gluten free pasta)

[sidewalkchemistry]

Why Cleaner Diets (Plant Based, Whole Foods, Raw Vegan, etc) Make People Sick & How to Easefully Adopt a Healthier Diet🦋 | Holistic Leveling Up!

Heard of people breaking out, unbalancing their hormones, getting fatigued, losing hair, developing gut issues, or becoming prone to colds having made a perfectly nutritious upgrade to their diet? (BTW I don't mean anything low-carb or high-fat. These don't meet the body's actual needs and lack fiber. They are not wise to practice unless you want fatigue and constipation).

Apart from the psychological and social difficulties of adhering to a healthier diet, there are also the physiological effects. Many people will claim that fully adequate diets made them sick and it must just not work from them because "everybody's body is different." The actual reason for this is that the body's natural detoxification pathways become less encumbered, and especially if drastic switches are made, the rates of cleansing can be too intense (simply eating more nourishing foods over junk foods is cleansing as it supports detoxification rather than inhibiting it). Most people are unaware that we have to take such permanent lifestyle transformations like this gradually, especially if we come from a history of illness or heavy junk food eating. I always recommend using the transitory principles of the Mucusless Diet Healing System (devised by Prof. Arnold Ehret), no matter how you are changing your diet. So, if you are looking to nourish your body as it deserves, seeking to remove processed foods, towards a primarily-fully whole foods, plant-based, home-cooked, mucusless, and/or frugivorous diet, all of the following applies.

Step 1: Understand that everything in nature makes permanent changes with transitory phases. For example, the life cycles of animals and growth of plants. Ehret says that "Nature's mills grind sure but slow." Overnight, cold turkey methods are not reliably effective because they work against nature. What we eat affects us chemically several times per day. To make a change in our foods is to change the chemical environment within us. (Making continual, progressive transformations to diet & lifestyle can look like this).

Step 2: Eliminate the worst mucus-forming foods first. Pus-forming foods (animal based products) are the most obstructing as they decompose in the digestive tract. They create the most powerful cravings and impediments to healing, since they have gummy residues and are fiber-less, which causes them to struggle to be fully eliminated from the digestive tract. If you are already off of animal ingredients, reduce/eliminate rice, gluten pasta, and other sticky grains from your diet. Opt for more coarse, sprouted, and gluten-free grains, like wild rice, millet, and buckwheat (until you transition away from them if that is your goal).

Step 3: Increase your intake of fruits and vegetables, especially the virtually fat-free and starch-free [or starch-free once cooked] ones because they are mucusless (for example, avocados, potatoes, and cassava are mucus-forming). These will help you to adjust to more nourishing meals because they are the best at developing a diverse & balanced gut microbiome. Base your meals around ripe fruits and well-grown vegetables. Have a predominantly or all-fruit breakfast (eg. baked peaches, spiced and stewed apples, smoothie, or fruit salad). Have a large delicious salad as (the bulk of) your dinner. Or follow the principles in the Transition Diet sections of the Mucusless Diet Healing System for most effective results. (For sensitive tummies or those unused to a fiber-rich lifestyle, introduce fiber gradually, focusing on fruit fibers, fresh cold-pressed juices, and smoothies). BTW eat enough! It can take a while to get used to feeling full up on plants. You may feel like you're eating tons, but it's all good :)

Step 4: Assist your body in its detoxification with holistically healthy habits. The most important of these is to undergo colon hydrotherapy. I know it seems strange from some, but since the gut is the foundation to our health and we have a long history in eating so many unsuitable foods don't eliminate completely (as we see with the prevalence of colon cancers and digestive problems), giving that additional cleaning to the intestines is as important as brushing your teeth. After having a natural bowel movement, it is suggested to do a lemon and distilled water enema (once a day to once a week, for best results). Enemas and colonics can also help relieve symptoms caused by lymphatic congestion, like headaches, colds, edema, bloating, toothaches, etc. Other holistic habits to assist cleansing: sweating, exercise & stretching, sauna, sunbathing (start with short periods in sun), salt/herb baths, fresh juice in the morning, breathwork, meditation & mindfulness (reduce stress), laugh more, get fresh air, aromatherapy, herbal teas, rational fasting protocols (begin first with mastering intermittent fasting and proper break-fast), naturally laxative food herbs (prunes, beets, chia seeds, psyllium husk, spinach, dates, etc), sound healing (relaxation), dry brushing, lymphatic massage, use of non-toxic products, etc. Try not to practice extreme things which can "shock" the body into intense detox phases. For example, cold plunging can be unhealthy for people with unregulated nervous systems.

Step 5: Kick out unhealthy cravings naturally. Replace them with whole food plant based, homemade alternatives. Or if you absolutely can not shake them, continue with your regular menus and eat it after your dinner salad. When your cravings are strong, be sure to continue with your colon hydrotherapy routine. Soon, your body will become cleaner and more sensitive to the foods (you will not want to experience their effects) and/or the craving will go away. Your cravings will tend to become healthier, for things like beans and your favorite fruit, rather than pizza and deep fried things.

Step 6: Keep things exciting. People often think eating healthier means more boring meals. Pfft. That's the exact opposite. There's so much intrigue in preparing high quality meals for yourself. And then...Your palate for all the rich plant flavors will expand too. I encourage you to try new fruits, vegetables, and herbs. Try some different beans, nuts, seeds, and grains too (if your goal isn't to be mucusless). Go to farmer's markets, wholesalers, ethnic markets & aisles, big box supermarkets, online specialty organic retailers (for bulk ingredients like dried fruit, herbs, or spices), and even clean convenience store items (eg. I've found unpasteurized tropical fruit pulps for smoothies, with no added ingredients). Research about the cuisines and herbal traditions from your own cultures and others. Often, the meals of the poor citizens were the most nourishing all along. You will discover more flavor combination ideas for salads, dips, sauces, spice blends, and teas. Rediscover that appreciation for simplicity and refreshing flavor in your meals.

Step 7: Enjoy the transition to doing bigger and better and more nourishing things for your body. You will easily become an expert in your own body and empowered to take your health into your own hands via these methods. Sometimes, it will feel arduous to get into the routine of meal prepping and grocery shopping -- but you're absolutely worth that effort. Understand the position you are in. You are making permanent epigenetic changes to the genetic codes you have been passed down. This is a gift that will impact the children you may have, the friends you make, the people you meet, and the generations to come. When we heal ourselves, we are not just healing our individual selves. It is about helping our world which has become so sidetracked with destructive habits & refortifying the influence of the nurturing instinct.

BEFORE YOU GO✨

Here's some extra guidance from 20+ year Mucusless Diet Healing Practitioner and Arnold Ehret expert, Prof. Spira in his article "Art of Transition":

"Although Ehret was a fruitarian thinker who asserted that a mono-fruit diet is the best for humans, he by no means suggested that people in our pathological condition can achieve such a level immediately without a considerable amount of dietary transition and PRACTICE of the Mucusless Diet. Many health seekers hear of fruitarianism and aspire to just jump right in without an extended period of transition...

Ehret’s healing system is not immediate raw-foodism, mono-fruit diet, or irrational extended water fasting, but a SYSTEM that coordinates the use of raw and cooked mucusless and mucuslean menus—in concert with short and long term periods of RATIONAL FASTING—to safety and effectively transition off of all mucus-forming foods. Yes, raw-fruit-mono diet is identified to be supreme, yet we must earn this level of excellence.

Not over night, but only after having paid reparations for the wrong that we, and our relatives, have done to our bodies all the days of our life. The key to sustaining the diet on a long term basis is the mastery of the Art of Transition. Whether it is through intuition, intellect, spiritual awakening, or scientific understanding, emancipating oneself from eating pus and mucus must be a top priority for those interested in physiological freedom.

And after generations of mucus-eating ancestors, it will simply not happen overnight. There is no shortcut around the transition. As Brother Air often says, 'you can be on the transition diet for more than 30 years if you need to be, but you will still be here.'”

May all beings be blissful💚😊🌼

[spooniechef]

Admiral's Gingerbread (3 spoons)

It's been a rough last couple of months and I haven't really had the spoons to try new recipes for the most part, plus I was running out of interesting ones in my few cookbooks.

Thing is ... now I have new cookbooks. My bestie pre-ordered me a copy of B Dylan Hollis' Baking Yesteryear the moment we all learned about it. So I thought, "Hey, how about I pull a 'Julie and Julia' with this, and with Exquisite Exandria when it comes out, and cook my way through it to see how spoon-friendly it is?" So that's what I'm going to do the next little while.

(Well, insofar as I can, anyway. A lot of these are American and I'm not sure exactly how we find Velveeta here in the UK.)

Now, a lot of those recipes (hell, most of those recipes) involve flour, so I did some research to find a good brand of gluten-free flour that wasn't going to break the bank. The brand I found is from Middleton Foods, by the way, and it actually mixes in the xanthan gum so you don't have to do the measurements etc yourself. Plus it fits a lot of the parameters I have for the ingredients you find in good gluten-free pasta, so I had high hopes. I also had a yen for gingerbread.

Though Admiral's Gingerbread is honestly more gingercake, but ... bread in the "banana bread" sense. Thing is, however glorious the result, this is a recipe that, for someone with chronic pain issues, is made of no. Like, entirely no. Unless you own a hand mixer, do not do this one. ...But do get yourself a hand mixer because the results are great. The end result is this moist dense cakey bread with ginger tingling on the tongue and just a bit of that not-quite-bitter flavour of molasses. So I'll provide the recipe and then give the list of Things I Wish I'd Had When I Started This Mess.

Here's what you'll need:

225g (1 cup) butter (at room temperature)

1.5 cups self-raising flour

2 tbsp ground ginger

3 tbsp molasses or dark treacle

5 eggs (separated, yolks and whites both kept)

1.5 cups powdered sugar

1 tsp baking powder

It looks so simple, from the ingredients list. But the fun is just beginning.

Here's what you do:

Pre-heat oven to 350F (180C, 160C fan assist - and, after a bit of a Google to confirm for those in the UK with a gas oven, gas mark 4); grease a 9" by 5" loaf pan

Cream the butter; slowly beat in flour, ginger, and molasses

In a separate bowl, whisk the egg yolks and powdered sugar together

In another separate bowl, whisk egg whites until stiff (they should form peaks that don't fall over when you lift the whisk out of the mixture) and then beat in baking powder

Thoroughly mix the egg yolk mixture, and then the egg white mixture, into the creamed butter mixture.

Bake for 50-55 minutes or until a toothpick inserted into the centre of the loaf comes out clean.

My stomach and taste buds do not regret what I put myself through to make this gingerbread. The gluten-free flour was a huge success (seriously, Middleton Foods; if you've got gluten issues, it comes recommended), and I have now had two servings of it - with my evening hot chocolate last night and as breakfast this morning. My arms and shoulders, however, are telling me a tale of woe right now. That's mostly because (with the sole exception of beating the egg whites stiff) I did all of that by hand. So here are my tips and hints.

DON'T DO THIS BY HAND. Get a hand mixer. I do not know how people in the 1910s did this. I mean, I should have known better. Hollis states in the damn cookbook that hand mixers are essential. I'm honestly just glad that my hand blender has a whisk attachment that I could use for the egg whites or I'd be truly boned.

Double-check your loaf pan dimensions. It turned out my loaf pan was just a liiiiiiittle bit smaller than 9" by 5". Thankfully the overflow was only a couple of drips and not Vesuvius, but still, nobody needs that aggravation.

A very flexible rubber spatula is going to be your best friend, particularly when it comes to the molasses. Molasses is a bit of a mess to pour, so unless you're good enough to be able to measure approximately three tablespoons by eye (which some people are, and maybe I will be one day but I am not there yet), having something flexible to help scrape the molasses out of the spoon is a big help.

Another household appliance that feels essential in this one is a dishwasher, especially if doing most of the mixing by hand. Honestly, even with a hand mixer, the mixer attachments are going to need cleaning, and it's still the same number of bowls. If you don't have a dishwasher, it's helpful to keep the sink full of warm sudsy water so that you can at least pre-rinse everything before washing. This especially helps with any implement that's been involved with the molasses. ...Actually, if you have a dishwasher, put everything in warm sudsy water when you're done with it anyway; pre-washing is generally a good idea.

I still recommend that everyone who's interested in baking buy Baking Yesteryear by B Dylan Hollis, no matter what I write here. He's all about the beauty. (Even if that beauty is to be found in horror - HE INCLUDED THE SPAGHETTI-O JELLO RING I DON'T WANT TO MAKE THAT ... actually I don't think I can do that because we don't have Spaghetti-Os here and our equivalent is thickened with wheat flour. First time I've ever been glad to be gluten intolerant. Anyway.) I am just the accessibility person behind the scenes. He's on the Magic Baking Road Trip and I am in the works truck behind him putting up warning signs.

Today, the warning is "Hey, see this, what I did? Don't do that. Do it smarter". I'm doing a Wacky Cake next time, swear to god.

[lukewarmbreadatamoderatepace]

november 2022, purple carrot meal reviews:

penne with pesto and broccolini:

eating straight up roasted broccolini (or any of the brassica oleracea cultivars) not mixed into a larger dish will never be exciting to me, very "well I guess I'll eat these vegetables before I have the good-tasting part," but at least it wasn't just straight up broccoli.

The pesto is fucking delicious. It's made with sage rather than basil, and you put some spinach in there too (which might be typical for pesto but I've never made pesto before.) Taking a bite and discovering that some of it has snuck up into the hollow penne tubes is a wonderful little surprise treat every time.

The pasta was gluten free, I guess, which isn't relevant to me, but also wasn't something I would have noticed if it hadn't been labelled as such, so good job there.

It made me use the food processor, which means I had to clean the food processor, which I don't appreciate from a meal kit. I thought these were supposed to be fast and easy!

Still, extremely tasty, less work than I expected, and I felt very nourished. There's a reason I made this one first. 4/5

"thanksgiving sandwiches"

I don't think there's any way to spend 40 minutes making a sandwich and feel good about it. These are ciabatta rolls on which you put an array of ingredients that will dirty half a dozen dishes in your kitchen. Bowls, a saucepan, a roasting pan, a whisk, the gang's all here. The main "meat" of the sandwich is roasted brussels sprouts, which is not exciting and also incredibly impractical. Putting large solid orbs in your sandwich means the process of eating the sandwich is centered on the effort to prevent those orbs from falling out and rolling away. They had the audacity to expect me to also dip the sandwiches into a gravy mixture, which would be an insane thing to do with any sandwich, but even moreso with one as precarious as this.

The other main ingredient is broccoli slaw, which would stay in the sandwich well enough if the bread were allowed to embrace it, however these huge brussels orbs prevent this, so actually this is a brussels sprout sandwich with a side of broccoli slaw that starts out inside the sandwich.

If you are very very careful, you still can't prevent the entire brussels sprout from ejecting itself from the sandwich and into your mouth the instant you bite, and now you your job is trying to make it through this enormous brussels sprout before you can take another bite of the parts of the food that taste good. My jaw hurts. Possibly I should have roasted the brussels sprouts for longer, but shoving gigantic brussels sprouts into a sandwich was a mistake from the start.

utter foolishness. 2/5

Also unless I'm missing something, both of the above recipes straight up lied about including garlic among the provided ingredients. Luckily I had garlic on hand, but that could have been very annoying.

------

[note from the present: there was a third meal in that kit that I intended to do a silly little review for too but then I never got around to making it. ty to Fen for sending me the free mealkit tho, I was eating really badly around that time and it was really good to eat some stuff that was actually good & nutritious]

[m1d-45]

Its similar to mac and cheese, but instead you put in the meat, pasta/macaron/whatever, add in the egg mixed with milk, spices and put it in the oven for 45+ min., You can either put the cheese gratin/grates? Grated cheese? On top before cooking or 15 min. Before its done.

Its really good when done right, i recommend grinded black pepper, little! Amount of chili mixed REALLY well, salt, a little bit of dried red pepper, dried garlic and... Is it lemon pepper? Anyways, a pepper that has somehow been named lemonpepper.

The best thing? You can change it into vegan. Or milk free, or gluten free, you can use chicken, pepperon or any meat though i haven't tried it with fish since that shit can go wrong too easily and is too pricy for me to wanna experiment-

Im a foodie, alright? I had a test coming up when i was 14 and my mom literally BRIBED me with food and i aced the test!

(of course, you gotta cook the meat and boil the pasta first, before putting it in the oven.)

-🥘Stew

‘lemon pepper’ as a spice is dried lemon bits mixed with pepper, unless you’re talking about an actual plant named ‘lemonpepper’ in which case i’m confused too

also, that does sound good! i’m not a fan of mac n cheese nor casseroles at all (texture of casseroles <<<) but that seems like it’s something really tasty and probably simple after a bit of repetition. thanks for sharing!

[cyarskaren52]

thanksgiving Day is next week! If you have some ideas for a good meal plan just don’t bring these items to the table

FOOD

17 Dishes You BET NOT Bring to a Black Thanksgiving

You'll be better off bringing paper plates than potato salad with raisins.

By

Kalyn Womack

Published12 hours ago

There are more than a dozen things that are off the table (or should be kept off the table) when it comes to what to bring to Thanksgiving. Or rather...a Black Thanksgiving.

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I don’t know what the white folks do over there but over here? We eat sweet potato pies, not pumpkin pies. We eat mac n’ cheese without breadcrumbs. We’d also rather you make one item in its classic recipe versus making it into a casserole.

Black folks stick to the same menu every year and it hasn’t budged for decades now. 

If you’re debating on what to bring to Thanksgiving this year, check out this list of 17 things not to bring. And remember: when in doubt, bring the liquor. 

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2 / 19

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Green Bean Casserole

Amongst the several polls I sent out requesting ideas for this list, this abomination was at the top. The only acceptable form of green beans is with smoked turkey neck and potatoes. Why is it a trend to make this a casserole?

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3 / 19

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Mashed Potatoes

This may be debatable, but trust...you’ll never find this in my household. We have other things to hold gravy. Enter: rice, dressing, and of course, turkey.

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4 / 19

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Potato Salad with Raisins

Matter fact, keep anything you got with raisins in it. Keep ya potato salad, ya pasta salad, macaroni salad and the criminal attempt at a pan of macaroni and cheese if it has raisins. You must do time over this.

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5 / 19

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Pumpkin Things

I don’t have anything against pumpkins for the rest of the Fall/Autumn season, but on Thanksgiving? This is strictly a sweet potato household. If I bite into a pie and it’s pumpkin, we might have to fight.

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6 / 19

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Creamed Spinach

Why? You’re better of bringing artichoke dip for us to snack on while we wait for the food. No one is putting this on their plate.

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7 / 19

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Brussels Sprouts

There’s a specific selection of vegetables that are Thanksgiving-friendly and Brussels sprouts ain’t on the list, sweetheart. Now...if you know how to make them Capital Grille style, you can bring me a pan ;)

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8 / 19

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Canned Greens

Since I was a child, I sat in the kitchen snapping green beans and watching my grandmother clean the collards. You think I don’t know the difference between fresh and canned vegetables? Go head...take the risk of being embarrassed by the shady banter of the entire family if you cut corners and bring canned greens.

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9 / 19

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Boxed Gravy 

Again, we can tell the difference. There are too many leftover greases and turkey juices for you to not be able to make a gravy. Leave that flavorless roux home.

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10 / 19

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Fruit Cake

The main desserts include pie, cobblers, banana pudding and maybe a pound cake. If you walk in with a fruit cake, you will also leave with that fruit cake.

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11 / 19

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Sugar- or Gluten-Free Sweets

Speaking of desserts, we like sugar. We embrace gluten. Even if you’re trying to be conscious of the one guest who has a dietary restriction, please let the rest of us enjoy ourselves.

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12 / 19

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Beyond Meats

On any other day, I will embrace vegan alternatives. But please don’t play with my pork chops and turkey wings.

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13 / 19

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Gelatin-Based Oddities

We’re wayyy past that odd 1980s moment when everything edible was put in gelatin. Leave it alone, babes..unless it’s Jell-O shots. Those are always welcome.

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14 / 19

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Ambrosia

I just learned that this unicorn vomit had a name. That being said, don’t you even dare.

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15 / 19

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Soup

Why?

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16 / 19

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Broccoli-Cheddar Whatever

I get it. Tis’ the season to embrace all variations of broccoli-cheddar dishes. But do us a favor and leave your go-to lunch food in the fridge.

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17 / 19

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Spaghetti

Are you crazy? Your kids have been eating spaghetti for the past week and that’s what you bring to the feast of feasts?!

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18 / 19

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Whatever You Know You’re Not In Charge Of...

Every family has the one relative they can count on for a prominent Thanksgiving dish. If Mama makes the mac n’ cheese every year, please don’t consider this your moment to play Hell’s Kitchen. You will lose.

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19 / 19

List slides https://www.theroot.com/17-dishes-you-bet-not-bring-to-a-black-thanksgiving-1851031675/slides/19

Sent from my iPhone

[funkforbreakfast]

“Let me cook for you”

Cooking is a huge importance to me — food was an activity that brought together my family during the holidays, custody exchanges, and sunday nights. My parents expressed their love to us via homemade dinners and produce grown from our backyard, but I still paid close attention to their techniques so as to pick them up myself. In college, I opted out of a meal plan as soon as possible — slicing and sauteing brought me more joy than an easy meal ever could (with the added bonus that my acid reflux disappeared as soon as I stopped eating from Dewick). But whenever I want to catch up with friends, they suggest a dining hall or Tufts cafe.

“Let me cook for you”

I struggle to choose easy meals to prepare, but I’d rather spend the two hours cooking with a loved one and then eating for twenty minutes. We are making something together, a collaborative effort that reassures our compatibility. Sometimes this is soup or pizza — but most recently, it was butter chickpeas, for 100 people.

The Tufts Mountain Club has been my central community in college. It encouraged me to be more mindful of my health when I was at my worst, but also expanded my definitions on how to enjoy the outdoors (I am now a self proclaimed Everglades lover). It might be a 900 person club, but there are pockets within it that hold the most genuine people I’ve met during my time here. And most of my strongest friendships have only started at the Loj in New Hampshire.

Last weekend, I was in Woodstock, New Hampshire for the return of one of TMC’s favorite traditions — Lojstock. This music festival amongst the mountain welcomes 100 band and audience members for a day of river swimming, barbeque eating, and good tunes. As someone who took on more of the planning process than I would have liked, I naturally opted for the free way to attend Lojstock — joining the cooking team. This crew was assembled of my favorite TMC people to hang with in a warm kitchen — people who let the stress make them a little goofy. Usually, the kitchen crew cooks common cabin staples like overcooked pasta with jarred tomato sauce or crusty chili. But, as a food connoisseur, I vetoed both meals and settled for a much more interesting option: butter chickpeas. I was nervous at the outcome, but people returned for seconds and thirds and even brought home leftovers in tupperware! My favorite thing about this meal is that 1) it tasted significantly better than any other loj meal, 2) was easier on my stomach than chili or gluten, 3) it was relatively high in veggies (which is hard to come by at the Loj). 

Lojstock ‘23 Butter Chickpeas

Contributors: Jeannine Pecoraro ‘25, Lily Pearl Langos ‘24, Danny Rodriguez ‘24, Carmen Smoak ‘25, Gwen Brown ‘24

This dish was a HUGE hit at Lojstock ‘23 and sooo many people asked for the recipe afterwards. It is about as easy as making chili; however, it is a much more interesting and yummy dish. Requires knowledge of spices/general butter sauce taste.

Inspired by https://cooking.nytimes.com/recipes/1020739-indian-butter-chickpeas  

Prep: 30 minutes Cook time: 1 hour Yields: ~100 servings

Allergens/restrictions

Dairy, alium

Not vegan unless you swap butter for vegetable oil

Ingredients

20 red onions

16 cans of chickpeas

Eyeballed amount of garlic powder (be generous)

Eyeballed amount of ginger

Eyeballed amount of ground cumin

Eyeballed amount of paprika

Sprinkle of cinnamon

4 sticks of butter

8 cans of crushed tomatoes

15 cans of coconut milk

Eyeballed amount of curry powder

Instructions

Mince or blend the onions

Empty chickpeas into a strainer and rinse with water. Move it a large bowl and combine with the spices (have your friend with the best spice knowledge complete this step, you do NOT want to underseason this dish)

Melt butter in the largest pot over medium-low heat. Add onions and cook til browned at edges (approximately 30 minutes), stir often.

Add in crushed tomatoes and stir.

Add in coconut milk and stir.

Add in the chickpeas and stir. Let the mixture stew and bubble until chickpeas soften but stir occasionally to prevent burning.

Add curry powder and salt to taste (DO NOT SKIP THIS STEP, THIS IS WHAT BRINGS THE RECIPE TOGETHER!!)

Serve with rice and enjoy!!

[mulberrytreegranola]

Gluten in Grains. Could Grain-Free be the Answer for Many?

Gluten in grains. It is fairly straightforward right? By now we understand which grains contain gluten, which are gluten-free, and which are not even grains at all. Yet it turns out that it is not that simple, and that things are never quite what they seem. In this article we delve deeper into the subject of gluten in grains and consider why, for many, going completely grain-free may be the answer.

The gluten-free gold standard

Once was a time when gluten-free wasn't actually a thing for most of us. Unless blighted by coeliac disease or a severe allergy to wheat, we could quite happily have our cake and eat it. For those who suffered from the consequences of eating wheat and associated glutens, it was necessary to follow a gluten-free diet. Which back in the day was a lot less complicated. Gluten-free alternatives were available, yet nowhere near as widespread as they are today. The market for gluten-free foods (as oppose to naturally gluten-free produce) came about in response to greater demand from the coeliac community. The entire body of gluten-free literature and law was defined by the specifics of coeliac disease. Which is great. When it comes to the question of allergens, people need to understand the severity of such a disease. What triggers coeliac disease? It is widely accepted that a coeliac reaction is triggered by the gluten proteins in the Triticeae family of grains; wheat, barley and rye. Specifically, the storage proteins known as prolamines, and glutelins. The chemistry is complex, as chemistry tends to be, but it also involves levels of particular amino acids, including glutamine and proline. The point here is that in many (most) countries the measurements that allow foods to be labelled as gluten-free are based upon these specific proteins, in accordance with the lowest levels that may trigger a coeliac response. So far, so good.

Gluten in grains

But here's the thing. There is gluten in ALL grains. Part of the unique genetic make-up that defines a true cereal grain is the presence of prolamines. Those gluten storage proteins which help the seed to sprout. In wheat, it is gliadin. In barley, it is hordein. In rye, it is secalin. In oats, it is avenin. In rice, it is orzenin. In maize, it is zein. And in sorghum, it is kaferin. In theory, although the jury is still out on oats, other than the proteins in wheat, barley, and rye, none of these trigger a reaction in those with coeliac disease. Which is why rice, oats, maize, and sorghum, are all designated gluten-free. EVEN THOUGH they do actually all contain gluten proteins.

Can the gluten in all grains cause a reaction?

It must first be said that there are many good things about grains. We have no intention of vilifying any food and if you are considering eliminating any foods from your diet then it should be with good reason. Nutrition is rarely straightforward and there are times when the benefits can outweigh the risks. Careful consideration is key. But yes, the gluten in all grains has the potential to cause a reaction. Each type is different, just as we are all different. Rice, for instance is considered to be the most benign grain of all. Yet some people do have an inflammatory reaction. Corn, alongside rice, finds its way into most gluten-free alternative foods such as pasta or bread, yet has a high protein content that has been shown to trigger sensitivities in a huge number of people. It is now understood that what may be safe for many coeliacs, can indeed trigger a response in those with a gluten allergy, or sensitivity. And that the reasons that people seek out information, or gluten-free products, may not necessarily be confined to our current definitions and understanding. Take a look at our introduction to gluten free food. Or explore our range of gluten-free groceries. This article was reproduced on this site with permission from operafoods.com.au the “Gluten Free Cereals Manufacturer”. See original article:- Gluten in Grains. Could Grain-Free be the Answer for Many? Read the full article

[hazelandglazed]

8. Pasta Verde (To Celebrate Spring, Goddammit)

These pasta are filled with Spring green vegetables: peas, asparagus, whatever you want to add to the mix, and the good thing? You can do it all year long with frozen veggies if you so choose!!

Plus, I added some salmon to have a complete dish, but you really don’t have to ;)

Ready?

Go!

Ingredients

Some sort of pasta (spaghetti or tagliatelle are my first choice, but really, if all you have is macaroni, go with it)

Asparagus

Peas (I prefer Garden peas, which are a bit larger than regular peas, but that’s just me)

Edamame or Fava beans 

One shallot, diced, plus a teaspoon of butter

One lemon

One salmon fillet per person, shredded*

A spoonful of cream

Salt, Pepper, Turmeric

*If you use fresh salmon, great, you can just leave it be until the end of the recipe. If you use frozen salmon, you’ll need to just put it in the microwave around 45 seconds (in 2 rounds, trust me). You should season it too, whichever the state you use it in.

Cook all the greens in a pot of salted boiling water, with a large wedge of lemon, for 2 minutes, counting when it starts boiling again. Once you strain it, if available, add two ice cubes and leave it to the side.

In a large pan, melt the butter, add some salt, some pepper and a teaspoon of turmeric. When it all forms a sauce of sort, add the diced shallot until it becomes almost translucent.

Then add your veggies and leave it there until it all looks shiny and, well, delicious. Turn off the heat.

(Truth is, you could stop there, but a complete meal also has the protein and one feculent, ergo, pasta)

Cook your pasta just shy of all dente.

Add the spoonful of cream into your veggie pan, with the salmon.

Before you strain the pasta, take some of that pasta water into the pan to make the sauce more homogeneous.

Strain the pasta

Add it to the pan and mix delicately until everyone has gotten acquainted with each other.

Add some lemon juice, and fix the seasoning to your taste.

Bon appétit!

(This dish can be prepared in large quantities and frozen again for later use ;))

[thebibliosphere]

Hiya, I know this probably isn't your area of expertise but if you have any input or know of someone who can help, I'd appreciate being pointed in the right direction. My husband almost certainly has undiagnosed celiacs (because the nhs doc has their head up their ass i guess) and since he stopped imbibing it, we stopped buying any of those products containing gluten. This means I have stopped having it for nearly a month and, last night we got snacks at Tesco (including some cookies I love and the custard donuts I miss) and if what I went through is any indicator I have either also celiacs or gluten sensitivity or I have a new to me and unthought of problem.

To get to the main point, not being able to bake is absolutely devastating to me, its been a favorite hobby and a major comfort action all my life. Coconut flour is miserable to work with due to texture problems. Do you have suggestions on what flour-replacement thing would be best to bother with? I doubt we will be getting any help or advice from our gp(even though we asked over 2 months ago) so we must become a boat, as it were, on our little island north of Scotland.

Ah, friend, I’m sorry to hear that. And this is actually something I’m pretty good with because I used to work at a bakery and still baked a lot until my MCAS took away my ability to eat more things.

If you’re looking for a good 1-to-1 substitute flour, “Free” from Dove Farms is a pretty good one. Their rice flours also have a good texture, and their white bread flour (all in the link above) actually makes a really good pizza base.

As far as I’m aware, Bob’s Red Mill all-purpose gf flour is available in the UK as well, and also works really well, though I’m not sure how expensive it is over there. I only ever used the Dove range before moving. They also maks things like baking powder and yeast, and I think pasta too, though I’ve never tried the latter.

I’ve also really enjoyed baking with masa harina for certain things like shortbreads and pie crusts--and of course tortillas! It also makes the best gluten-free potato scones I’ve made since going gluten-free and it’s really easy to make wonderful potato scone wraps which can sometimesbe very crumbly and stiff with other gluten-free flours.

You could also use oat flour (just grind oats in a food processor until you get a flour consistency), but be warned that while your husband is going through the healing process, he (and possibly you) may be reactive to oats, even specified gluten-free ones. There’s an enzyme, forget what it is, that’s similar enough that can make celiac guts unhappy. Dairy can also be a problem, but I’d advise not cutting it out entirely unless directed to by a physician because you can actually lose your lactose tolerance by cutting it out.

Anyway, I hope that helps, and I am sure people who still live there and have more access to what’s in the actual shops will have great advice! Good luck and take care.

[thessalian]

Thess vs Exocolonies

Just finished my first playthrough of I Was A Teenage Exocolonist. And ... well, the ending I got was a gut-punch. The game in general was a lot deeper than I expected from the demo, which is obviously a good thing. Just holy crap.

The way they’ve set it up gives a serious amount of replay value, too. Precognition mechanics are generally a little weird to handle, but they managed to make it work here, more than adequately - mostly by hardly ever using them except for either as flavour or a few times it really mattered. All in a game that looks like a basically cute life management sim / card game thing with really cutesy graphics. There’s layers, and so many paths you can end up taking, and the ending sets it up to just ... have another go. Well. I say ‘just’ - depending on what ending you get, you may not entirely want to do another run-through for fear it’ll all go wrong. And then you have to wonder ... what if none of the endings are happy? But there must be one, right? I guess it depends on what you consider ‘happy’. So ... yeah. Deep. Cute, and deceptively simple mechanics-wise, but deep.

So ... indie games, am I right?

Seriously, while it’s a bummer that today’s D&D shenanigans had to be cancelled on account of ill fortune, it’s probably just as well. It’s been a really rough week and I need the chill-time, and I have whole new game that’s begging to be played again some more. Thing is, it’s one of those serious hyperfocus games (almost as good as Lego) so there are things I should probably do before I start up another game. Like, painkillers, and I need to nip out to the shops quickly, and also I need to order dinner because I couldn’t get grocery delivery until tomorrow, forgot to take anything out of the freezer and ... well, I’m not using the Tesco gluten-free pasta unless things are seriously dire. That stuff is gross.

On the subject of the groceries, though, the Making Of The Things continues apace. I am just really into making my own snacks right now, so I got the means to do it more. Like, I’m going to be doing the three-ingredient peanut butter cookies again, but I’m also going to make the peppermint patties that were another successful B Dylan Thomas recipe find. And, while it obviously won’t be ready right away, I decided to make better use of the mint in my windowsill-and-balcony garden and am going to start making my own peppermint extract so I can make more of the peppermint patties later. And on top of all of that? I’m going to be making my own gummy bears. I got some moulds, some gelatine, some honey, and some fruit juice, and that’s all I need.

But today? Today I am not making anything except for a trip to the corner shop. Just going to sit quietly eating a takeaway and playing I Was A Teenage Exocolonist. With maybe finishing Take 2 of Solasta: Crown of the Magister. Though that reminds me I have to finish the IC liveblog for that one and I’m at the perfect point. Maybe I’ll make something after all.

[clatterbane]

I turned out a variation on this one pot pasta for an easy makeshift supper, and it was really good!

We had half a small head of cabbage left in the fridge to use up, and around half a pound of the frozen kebab meat that seems very popular here. (And is super handy to keep.) Seemed like a good start. Since that wasn't as much cabbage as I would have liked, I also threw in a chopped up carrot and a big handful of frozen green beans to fill it out and also add some variety.

For the usual roughly half a pound (200-250g) of pasta to feed two of us--Barilla gluten free fusilli tonight--I added the usual 500-600mL of water along with the tomatoes. Or, just enough to make sure none of the pasta is poking ing up out of it, high and dry. It didn't look like this was calling for enough liquid, even accounting for some cooking out of the cabbage. Plus, a Knorr vegetable broth cube and some extra herbs/red pepper flakes/etc. since the kebab meat isn't as highly seasoned as sausage.

This recipe also calls for about half the cooking time under pressure that most types of pasta will want. Especially in a sauce with tomatoes. A pretty good rule of thumb, IME, is to start with half the usual stovetop cooking time plus another minute, then let it natural release for 5 minutes before opening the pot. If that's not enough time, it's easy enough to simmer a few more minutes with the lid off. Preferably let it sit for a few minutes before digging in!

(In the GF pasta department, IME Barilla or Garofalo work the best for the one pot approach. They behave very much like regular durum wheat pasta in general, and hold up great. No issues with their turning mushy or breaking all to hell if you so much as look at them wrong.

Not at all recommended, from experience: 100% rice or corn pastas, as much as I do like them for some other uses. Or whatever the hell supplier Sainsbury started using for their Free From store brand, unless that's changed again since we left the UK. I just stopped buying any of that except for the macaroni which probably came from a different manufacturer.)

[im-bakugous-bitch]

Mezo Shoji - Quarantine (NSFW!!)  (bnharem collab!)

Hey guys, Sky here!  As I announced the other day, I am participating in the bnharem discord server collab event!  Our topic was being quarantined together and things get kinky, and I ended up with everyone’s favorite arm man.  I really enjoyed writing this and I think it’s the best thing I’ve written in a while - but not the best of the bunch!  You can read the rest of the collab pieces for different characters here!  I hope you guys like it!

Kinks included are: Role-Play, Bondage, Edging/Orgasm Denial, Masturbation, and Biting

The world had been launched into chaos.

With the novel coronavirus, COVID-19 going around, people were in a panic.  Stores were closing, restaurants were closing, and everybody was told to go into quarantine for two weeks.  Even your boyfriend was told to stop doing his daily patrols; Only the more experienced Heroes were patrolling the empty streets of Japan.  

As soon as the quarantine had been announced, you ran to the local department store to stock up on items you and Mezo would need for the next two weeks.  There was hardly anything there, though, as you had gotten there rather late.  You sighed, picking up the few frozen toaster pizzas and boxes of gluten-free pasta that were left on the shelves.

You had no idea what you were going to do for the entire quarantine.  You were excited to be spending so much time with your boyfriend, but you knew you were both going to get bored of just sitting on the couch watching movies all day long.  

You began to browse the other sections of the store until you hit the clothing section.  You spotted a blue dress, the same colors as Mezo's Hero costume.  You walked over to it and examined it, grinning as you noticed the very low cut and short skirt.  You checked the rack for your size and grinned when you found it, throwing the dress into your shopping cart.

You knew exactly what you and Mezo would be doing.

~~~~~     ~~~~~     ~~~~~     ~~~~~     ~~~~~

It took two days until you got tired of watching movies on the couch.

You'd honestly thought it would have lasted longer, but by the time you were on the tenth movie of your quarantine you were going to scream if you had to watch one more opening sequence.  You decided it was time to break out your present for Mezo and excused yourself to your bedroom to get an extra blanket.

You pulled the bag with your outfit in it from the back of your closet and raced into the bathroom attached to your bedroom.  You locked the bathroom door before beginning your work; Shaving your legs, brushing and styling your hair, make up, etc.  Once you were ready, you picked up the bag with the clothes as a knock echoed through the bathroom.

"y/n?" Mezo asked from the other side of the door.  "Are you alright in there?"

"All good," you said as you looked at your reflection in the mirror, a smile creeping across your face.  "I'll be out shortly!"  You opened the bag and first took out the fishnet tights you'd bought, taking off your underwear before putting them on.  The cool March air made your exposed area feel cold, and the wetness already pooling within you was not helping.  

Next you slipped on the dress.  It was a simple dress: Skin tight, off-the-shoulder, blue on the top that slowly turned into a black at the bottom.  Once you had it on you turned to look at yourself in the mirror and saw that the dress just barely even covered your ass.  You smirked before putting on the final article; knee-high black boots.  

You gave yourself one last look in the mirror, making final adjustments to your hair before you reached for the doorknob.  You unlocked it and slowly turned the doorknob, only pushing the door open slightly.  You poked your head out of the doorway to see Mezo laying on your bed, watching the television.  "Babe," you said, but immediately retracted your head before he could see you.

"y/n?" he asked, and you noted the worried tone in his voice.  "You've been in there a long time, is everything okay?"

"Everything is fine," you said, hand gripping the doorknob tightly.  "Just close your eyes for a second, okay?"

You could hear the hesitation in his "okay", but believed him as you opened the door all the way.  You stood in the doorway with your hands on your hips, finally exposing your whole body to the room.  

"You can look now."

His eyes opened and turned to you, quickly widening when he saw what you were wearing.  He practically jumped up off the edge of the bed and ran over to you.  "y/n?!"

You shook your head as you reached your arms up to hang around his neck.  "There's no y/n here, Tentacole.  I'm your new sidekick, Desire.  Didn't the agency tell you I was coming?"  You furrowed your eyebrow and cocked your head to the side in confusion as you looked up at him.

He took a deep breath.  "y/n, I'm gonna be cumming if you don't-"

"Shh," you said, moving one of your hands from around his neck to cover his lips over his scarf.  "I don't know who this y/n is, Tentacole, but I'm sure she'd want you to enjoy yourself.  Unless..."  You pulled your arms away from him and took a step back, making a pouty-face as you looked at the ground and used one of your hands to grab the opposite arm.  "Unless...You don't want me...?"

Within a second, he was upon you.  Hisips crashed against yours, real hands cradling your cheeks while his dupli-arms pulled you closer to him.  He pressed his crotch against your leg to show you how big of a boner he had.  

"See what you've done, Desire?"  One of his dupli-arms had formed a mouth, and it was whispering directly into your ear.  "It's never good to upset the Pro on the first day, you better take care of this."

You grinned as you looked up at him.  "Oh, I was planning to."  You wrapped your arms around his neck and pulled him in for another kiss, noticing that his scarf had already been discarded.  You connected your lips to his as his hands landed on your nearly-bare ass, squeezing it ever-so-slightly.  

"Jump," he whispered against your lips.

You did as instructed and jumped up, wrapping your legs around him as he pushed you against the wall.  Two of his dupli-arms had formed mouths and began attacking both sides of your neck, sucking and biting on all of the exposed skin.  Your eyes fluttered closed as your head leaned back, you could've finished just from that.

He started grinding his crotch against yours, pushing you into the wall.  "Who's a naughty little sidekick, getting me all worked up on the first day?" he growled as his dupli-arms began pulling the sleeves of your dress down.  "Huh?  Who do you think you are, getting me bothered like this?"  He pressed you against the wall harder, you could practically feel his dick against your slit through his thin pants.

"My apologies," you gasped out as your eyes opened up to look at him.  "I-I'm sorry, Mr. Tenta-cole!"  Your tone jumped in surprise when you felt something pinching your ass, and turned to see he had a dupli-arm with a mouth on it right next to the afflicted area.  The pattern of your tights had been ripped open.  You didn't know what he'd just done, but it felt so good you wanted him to do it again.  "Do that again," you panted into his shoulder.  

He smirked and pulled you away from the wall, still keeping you on his waist.  "You liked that, huh?"  You looked down at your ass and watched as the dupli-mouth bit down on your ass, moaning quietly as it began to suck on and lick the skin.

"Ah-" you moaned as you ground your hips against his to create some friction.  "Ah, if you keep doing that-"

Your sentence was interrupted when you went flying through the air and landed on your bed.  You sat up with wide eyes, watching Mezo as he towered over you and licked his lips.  

"You'll have to be punished, Desire," he said as his hand rested on your lower calf.  His hand slowly slid up your leg as he crawled onto the bed, until he reached the hem of your dress.  Directly above the spot where you desperately needed him.  You reached for his hand and grabbed his arm, trying to pull it down to where you needed him, but he proved stronger than you in holding his arm in place as he shook his head.

"That won't do," he said as he pulled back from you and got off the bed, walking over to his closet.  He opened it up and pulled out two neck ties as he grinned at you.  "Naughty girls don't get to use their hands."

Your eyes widened as he approached you again, grabbing your hands and tying them to the bed-frame so you couldn't move them.

"Mez-Tentacole," you whined as you struggled against your restraints.  "Don't do this."

He lifted his shirt over his head and deposited it on the floor behind himself as he crawled back over you.  "You're being punished, Desire," he growled as his dupli-mouths went back to work on both sides of your neck.

You groaned and pushed your hips upward, just wanting him to pay attention down there.  You watched as he lifted himself above you and slid his pants and underwear off, so he was completely naked above you.  "Tent-oh-cole!" you cried out as one of the mouths bit down extra hard on a certain spot.  "Oh, oh please - fuck me!  Punish me!  I've been a bad sidekick!"

He chuckled above you, staring down at you with lust-filled black eyes.  "Yes, you have," he said as the mouths retracted from your neck.  "And you will be punished."  He grabbed the hem of your dress again, flipping the skirt up so it sat over your chest.  He pressed his face into your crotch, against the fishnets, and hummed lightly as he gave your slit the tiniest lick.

You pulled against your restraints with all of your strength, just wanting to push him harder against you, but to no avail.  You instead watched as he pulled his face from your crotch and smirked.  

"You're already so wet for me," he said as he took the waistband of the tights in his hands and pulled them down your legs.  Once they were discarded, he placed himself between your legs and looked into your eyes.  "You tell me when you're going to cum, you hear me?  I'm your boss, that's your order."

You nodded, breathing heavily and excited at the idea of finally getting some action down there.  "Yes - Yes sir," you gasped out.

His head ducked back down between your legs, taking your clit between his lips.  Your head fell back against the pillows as you pushed your crotch closer to his face, trying to get him to suck it harder.  He got the message and obliged, using his hands to grab your ass and pull you as close to his face as he could.  You let out a loud moan, pulling yet again at your restraints as you wanted nothing more than to push him even closer.

With your closed eyes, you didn't know he was inserting something into your cunt until you felt it.  You opened your eyes, straining to see what he was now pushing in and out of you so rapidly.  You couldn't get a good look at it, though you weren't too focused on it.

You felt it coming.  You felt that familiar coil inside of you getting ready to snap.  "Ah, I'm so close-" you moaned out, hoping that would encourage him to go harder and bring you to orgasam.

Instead, he stopped.

He pulled his face away from you and watched your eyes widen as he licked his lips.  "You're being punished," he reminded you as he sat up on the bed and readjusted himself so his dick smacked against his stomach.  He began pumping his dick with one hand, the other gripping onto your leg so tightly you knew there were going to be marks on it.

"You dirty, naughty girl," he panted as his eyes shut, fist moving faster around his dick.  

"That's no fair!" you yelled as you tried to sit up, but your restraints didn't allow you to.  You could already feel your impending orgasm dying down, and a stronger hunger filled you as you watched Mezo pleasure himself.  

He didn't respond to you, his head leaning back as a dupli-arm began to fondle his balls.  "Oh, y/-Desire!"  You could tell he was already so close.  "Baby let me help you-"

"No," he cut you off.  "You're being punished.  You're lucky you even get to watch."  

You watched, helpless as your cunt throbbed with every stroke of his hand.  When he finished, he moved his hand up to your mouth.  

"Lick it clean," he said in the sexiest, most commanding tone you'd ever heard from him.

You nodded and took his fingers into your mouth, sucking them each clean before you licked his palm and swallowed it all.  "Please, Tentacole, can you please fuck me now?"

He smirked and shook his head, returning to his place between your legs.  He took up the same exact position as before, hands pulling your ass closer to his face as he shoved something in and out of your cunt.  Your eyes closed yet again as you laid your head back, imagining it was his dick that was filling you up.  You imagined him hovering over you, sweat pouring down both of your bodies, your hands clawing down his back-

"Ah-!" you cried out, and he immediately pulled away again.  You were about ready to smack him across the face.  "Please, please stop," you begged as your eyes met his.  "Please, Tentacole, please make me cum."

He climbed further up your body, giving no warning before shoving his dick deep into your cunt.  He didn't move a muscle as his eyes locked with yours.

He bent his head down to capture your lips with his in a surprisingly gentle kiss.  When he pulled away his face hovered only inches above yours, a loving smile on his face.  "I love you so much.  You're so perfect."

You smiled back up at him.  "Then untie my hands.  Please, let me touch you."

His malicious smirk came back, and you knew the moment was over.  He began to move inside of you, pulling almost all the way out before slamming himself back into you.  You screamed at the sensation, moving your hips with his as he finally gave you the fucking you'd been dying for.  

You pulled at your restraints again, and to your surprise the knots gave in.  A huge grin broke out across your entire face as your arms flew around Shoji's neck, sitting both of you up as he continued pounding your cunt like a piece of meat.  He didn't say anything as you connected your lips to his, digging your fingernails into his back and clawing your way downward as he kept going.  Once you'd reached the bottom and were sure you were going to leave a bright red mark, you quickly readjusted yourself so you were sitting over him.  

You pushed him back against the bed, your hands gripping the sheets on either side of his waist as you bounced up and down on his cock.

"Ah baby that feels so good," he groaned as he thrusted up to meet your thrusts.  "I'm not gonna last much longer."

You thought about denying him his orgasm like he'd been doing to you, but that would just deny you of yet another.  You decided to let him have it as a dupli-arm rose up to your breasts, forming a mouth and going below the neckline of the dress you were still wearing to attach to one of your nipples.  You gasped, causing another to quickly follow and attach to your other nipple as something began rubbing against your clit.

"Baby I'm gonna cum!" you yelled as your thrusting became sloppier and sloppier until he switched back to your previous position, him pounding into you with your back arched against the bed.

With only a couple more thrusts you felt him release into you.  You moaned loudly, you were so close-

It washed over you as soon as you felt the bite on your ass.

You rode out your orgasm before dropping yourself down onto Mezo, not bothering to wipe off any of the sweat that was pooling all over both of you.  You laid like that for a while, both of you panting and sticky as you caught your breath.

"Where did that come from?" Mezo finally asked after a few minutes, breaking the silence.

You turned over so you were laying on your stomach, staring up into his eyes.  "Not sure.  I saw the dress at the store, figured it would be a good quarantine activity."

He smiled, planting a light kiss on the top of your head.  "It definitely was."  He wrapped his arms around you and pulled you tightly against him.  "I think that was the best sex we've ever had."

You giggled as you nodded and leaned up to connect your lips with his.  The kiss was abruptly ended when you yelped, realizing Shoji had used a dupli-mouth to bite your ass again.

"Round two?" he asked.

You smiled and blushed slightly as you nodded.  "I'll meet you in the shower."

[no-footprints-in-the-snow]

My Recipes

Resharing my recipes to help out some people looking for foods to eat low-carb, low-cal options! <3 <3 <3 

My favourite foods for meals are hard boiled eggs (72 calories a piece - a dash of salt or pepper, as snacks or sandwich filler), tuna (120 calories a can), tilapia (80 calories a fillet), frozen salmon fillets (130/4 oz), romaine lettuce (5 calories for two LARGE leafs/10 for 4) for salads or in replacement of bread.

For tuna wraps (two cans of skipjack drained (240 calories), tbsp of full-fat mayo (80 calories), pepper medley, (you can add chives or celery), wrap in lettuce (head of lettuce - 5 calories for two LARGE leafs/10 for 4) -- makes multiple 'sandwiches'. (325 calories - 205 calories for 1 can) Sometimes I just drain a can of tuna, throw on some Clubhouse ‘La Grille’ Pepper Medley and eat it straight out of the can with a fork. (120 calories)

Egg salad wraps (two-three-four eggs, depends on how hungry you are), tbsp full-fat mayo (80 calories), yellow mustard to taste (0 cals) -- you can add a dash of salt or pepper, wrap lettuce (5-15) around it to make multiple 'sandwiches'. (229-301-373 calories - 2-3-4 large eggs)

I typically boil an entire carton of eggs in one sitting, remember that it takes more time to cook a whole carton. I also get cartons of egg whites (two containers/250g a container/a cup a container), I use a whole carton, microwave for 2 minutes 45 seconds, and then mix in a big tablespoon of peanut butter. It's surprisingly delicious! And low-carb. (206-286 calories if you use 1-2 tablespoons of peanut butter respectively) Veggies with dinner or any meal: Simply Steam Green Giant items (like cauliflower rice and broccoli with cheese sauce, broccoli and cauliflower with cheese sauce, and brussel sprouts in butter sauce). All of them are low-cal and delicious. I avoid corn. I'm more a veggie girl than a fruit girl (I've never really been a fan. I don't know why). (40-50-80 calories for half a package - 80-100-160 calories for a full package) You can even make an egg white omelette with one of those 250g cartons and Simply Steam veggies! Just add one cup/250g of egg whites into a frying pan (115 calories), I typically use the broccoli and cauliflower with cheese sauce package and it comes to 215 calories.

Snacks: Large hardboiled eggs (dash of salt or pepper) - (72 calories a piece), cherry tomatoes, carrots, bell peppers, celery, (all great for salads as well), peanut butter, greek yogurt (don't get sweetened ones, they have a LOT of sugar in them). Sometimes, I just slice up a whole tomato (Beefsteak - 33 calories), and put some salt on it, and eat just that as a snack.

Get full fat dressing of your choice to dip or use as dressing. Smoked oysters (good healthy fat) with Clubhouse “La Grille pepper medley”. (130 calories) However, I get light peanut butter.

You can put peanut butter on your celery. Also, 15 almonds is about 100 calories – if you put them in water and in the fridge, they'll double to triple in size, much more filling that way!

Carbs: Whole grain brown rice (usually Uncle Ben's Express roasted chicken, vegetable medley, or mushroom), ready in 90 seconds! I typically only eat half a bag because the carb count can add up, for the second use -- you add a cup of water in the microwave, and heat up for 45-60 seconds. (130-140-150 calories) / (260-280-300 calories for a full bag)

Feel like pasta? They have low calorie options by Slendier – "Calorie Clever", which is gluten free, low carb, and a source of fiber. An entire package is 25 calories.

Feel like pizza? Get the whole wheat 7" tortilla wraps (the smaller size), a dash of tomato sauce spread around with the bottom of a spoon, mozza fat-free cheese slices (X2), top with low-cal toppings, spinach, chicken – 7 minutes in the oven at 400F. (235 calories)

Dessert or sweet tooth? A big spoonful of peanut butter (80-190 calories), or you can make a packet of maple oatmeal (Quaker), and a cup of cottage cheese, is REALLY good as a dessert. Mix it together, it's creamy-deliciousness! Great as breakfast/lunch/dessert, whenever. (271 calories)

Also, ICE CREAM. Plain. Chocolate. Vanilla. Nothing EXTRA in it, is what I mean. Chapman’s even makes a sugar-free, lactose-free kind. Chocolate and vanilla. And yes, Chapman's makes sugar-free chocolate and vanilla, and even ice cream sandwiches – so those are keto friendly! lol

I'm lactose-intolerant so I tend to avoid dairy products. I -love- ice cream, but ice cream does NOT love me. Chapman's makes sugar-free, lactose-free Chocolate, Vanilla, Maple Walnut, Butterscotch Ripple, and Black Cherry Ice Cream! And they taste AMAZING.

Not only that, I find I urinate most of it out, so it doesn’t add to the scale the following day for me.

Broth – I also like chicken bone broth with turmeric and black pepper. Easy to find on Amazon. I add a little bit of chicken bouillon and it tastes like a mug of spicy chicken soup. (75 calories)

I keep vitamins on hand: Essential Electrolytes, K2, Liquid Vitamin D (the pills don't absorb properly), B6, B12, biotin, and I have Apple Cider Vinegar pills (with 'mother') and Turmeric pills on hand. Keep in mind that for some people ACV helps acid reflux, for others it doesn't.

Turmeric is NOT a supplement. Do NOT take it on an empty stomach. I took two pills, then drank coffee. It was like I ate a ghost pepper, I could feel the heat in my mouth for the rest of the day and my stomach hurt. Only take Turmeric BEFORE you eat a meal. I also only take ACV before a meal. Never on an empty stomach.

Remember that the low-fat options typically have a LOT more sodium/sugar in them!

Drink LOTS of water, and don't count coffee or other liquids as your water intake. If you want to determine the exact amount you should drink according to your body weight, you can follow these steps: Take your weight and divide it in half and translate the lbs to ounces. Done.

Avoid sugar-free gum unless you're going to chew the same piece for 60 minutes + because that's how long it takes to burn off the calories in it by chewing it. If you’re going to exercise -- than sugar-free gum won’t matter, but it slows down your weight loss because it causes an insulin spike. You won’t stay in ketosis because of it. This is the same thing with sugar-free energy drinks unfortunately. I find changing your eating window around helps, because it confuses your metabolism. All of these things are easy to make, because I'm lazy. LOL

P.S. I'm a 'dirty faster', and put sweetener in my coffee, albeit I'm learning not to put sweetener in. And lime in my water (you can use lime or lemon), which is scientifically proven to kick your metabolism in the butt. Cool/cold showers instead of hot ones actually burns calories, and clears up skin from acne as well.

P.P.S. I've actually been clean fasting since early February. So now, black coffee, green tea, and water, are the only thing I intake while I'm fasting.

[arctic-hands]

Goddamn I hate this system.

Not only is Medicaid still rejecting physical therapy for my degenerating back, but my EBT has been docked ninety dollars, leaving my celiac-having ass with just one hundred and forty four dollars to buy the expensive food that won't make me gravely ill, and that's on top of the rising food prices nationwide. It takes one hundred dollars of gluten free food just to keep me fed for a week! I can't make it on one hundred and forty four a month!

The DHR won't let you call unless you message someone in the portal first, and it's been my experience that using the portal gets you absolutely nowhere so who know what happens next

I can't even rely on food pantries because half the time it's all bread or pasta or other things I can't have

[brotherlysuggestion]

Some basic baking/cooking tips that I've picked up over the years:

Basic tips:

Food keeps burning on the outside but is underdone on the inside? Try a lower heat for a longer time. This goes for both the stove top and oven. All foods. Eggs, pancakes, cupcakes, cookies, whatever.

Put a little bit of oil and salt in the water you're cooking your pasta in. The oil will help keep the noodles from sticking together, and the salt helps add flavor.

In general, salt the water of stuff you boil! Contrary to popular myth it doesn't make water boil any faster, but it adds some nice flavor to your potatoes/pasta/etc.

Adding coffee to a boxed chocolate cake mix can bump up the taste a few notches! I like to brew black coffee and use it in place of the plain water the recipe asks for.

When using a stand mixer, mix in the flour on a lower setting, half a cup/cup at a time. If you put in a bunch of flour in at a high speed, it'll poof into a giant flour cloud and coat everything that you love in a fine coat of flour dust.

Crust on your pie/cheesecake keeps burning? Put tin foil around the rim of the pan, covering the crust. It will protect it from getting so overdone.

If you like brownies that are a little gooey in the middle, add an extra egg! It makes them super gooey without actually being undercooked/unsafe to eat.

In math, 4 of 1/4 cup = 1 cup. This is not how measuring cups work. I don't know why, but 2 half cups have more flour in them than 1 whole cup. If you double a recipe just use the original measurement cups/spoons twice, otherwise your ratios will end up screwy.

If you mix melted butter with a cold liquid, the butter WILL resolidify into little chunks! If you need your liquid butter to stay liquid, mix in room temp/warm liquid!

Softened butter gives a different texture to dough/batter than melted butter. Know which one your recipe calls for.

There’s multiple levels that your oven rack can sit on, like a shelf! They’re little grooves in the wall of your oven that the metal grate sits on. You almost always want to be using the very middle one, unless the recipe specifies otherwise.

If a recipe calls for spices/herbs/etc but comes out bland on first attempt, try it again! My rule with bland recipes is to try it twice: once seasoned as directed, and once with seasoning adjusted as if the author of the recipe is a suburban soccer mom who thinks ketchup is spicy. Go ham and double/triple/whatever the spices to your tastes. Try it with adjusted spices at least once before tossing the recipe out.

Weird but common terms in recipes:

If a recipe calls for "stiffly beaten egg whites" it means to beat them until they're white and foamy/frothy throughout!

If a recipe tells you to "fold" batter, it's a method of gentle stirring that gets a lot of air into the batter. You sort of mix the batter up and over itself using vertical strokes instead of horizontal.

Also "cutting in" butter or margarine is a specific mixing technique. You use a fork or a knife to incorporate very small chunks of butter into your flour/dry ingredients. This is a really good technique for making flaky pie crusts/biscuits (American biscuits, that is)

All of these weird terms are easily googled and have written or video tutorials on how to do it!

Safety advice:

If you ever use a pressure cooker; please, PLEASE very carefully read how to release/equalize the pressure before attempting to open it. It will straight up explode. It is dangerous for both your house and body. Don't just wing it, please.

Don't use wax paper in place of parchment paper in the oven! Parchment paper and wax paper look and feel very similar, but parchment paper is coated in a silicone layer while wax paper is coated in a wax (generally paraffin). Silicone is heat resistant. Wax melts off of the paper, potentially allowing the paper to catch fire. Don't catch your food on fire.

DO NOT try to put out a grease fire with water! Turn the heat off and either smother it by putting a lid/cover over it until it is deprived of oxygen and goes out, or smother it using baking soda or salt. DO NOT use flour/sugar/baking powder to try and smother the fire. These look similar, but their chemical makeup is different enough that they will catch on fire and make a bigger mess.

Nervous about food being uncooked in the center? Open them up! I always stab into the pancakes/potatoes/meat I cook to check that it's cooked thoroughly. I know it doesn't look picture perfect, but it'll be okay. You're allowed to check.

Dietary restrictions:

If you're using gluten free flour try adding some unflavored gelatine, pectin, or agar agar powder to add moisture and keep it from crumbling! Gelatine isn't vegan/vegetarian safe, but both pectin and agar agar are! About a teaspoon of powder to cup of flour usually does it, but there's a lot of guides online.

Egg replacements for recipes are numerous! Yogurt, ripe mashed bananas, peanut butter, agar agar in water, silken tofu, and cornstarch with water all work really well depending on what you’re making and how many eggs you’re replacing! There’s lots of guides online for this.

Recipe calls for buttermilk, but you can’t/don’t drink milk? Put in about a teaspoon of vinegar per cup of plant based milk (almond milk, rice milk, soy milk, etc.). BAM, buttermilk substitute!

Tofu, mushrooms, eggplants, and beans are all really good meat substitutes!

For disabled and neurodivergent bakers/cooks:

You’re allowed to sit down when baking! Get your ingredients and measuring tools all laid out in one place and take a seat while you blend ingredients! Take a seat while you stir your food on the stove! If standing is unpleasant for you, don’t do it!

If you have trouble keeping track of what ingredients you’ve put in already, make a list on a piece of scratch paper! Write down all of your ingredients and check them off when you put them in! If you need help to keep track of how many cups/tablespoons/etc. of something you’ve put in already, put a tally mark after each cup you put in! Then if you forget/lose track, you have a little checklist showing you where you are!

If you can’t handle the noise/stimulus of mechanical mixers, think about whether or not you can mix it by hand! It might take longer than when using a mixer, but it’s worth it if you otherwise couldn’t do it.

If the noise/stimulus of metal clinking against ceramics is bad for you, there’s multiple ways to get around that! Plastic bowls are inexpensive and will dull the noise of a spoon hitting them! Depending on what you’re doing, rubber spatulas can be used in place of a metal utensil, and those will make very little noise! If you need a fork replacement or a stiffer utensil, then check out baby utensils! Oftentimes forks/spoons/etc. for small children will be coated with a rubbery material on the outside, and if you can find them in sizes that aren’t too tiny, it will also muffle the noises a lot.

Reassurances that you aren’t a bad baker/cook:

All those cool cookie frosting designs from instagram? They frosted those using mostly/all royal icing. It's a runny icing that hardens quickly and is great for decorating cookies. Regular cake frosting won't ever really achieve the same effects as royal icing. If you've ever tried cookie decorating and it came out horribly then you probably aren't a bad decorator, you probably just didn't have the right frosting.

It’s okay if you feel like there’s too much for you to remember! Most all (good) recipes lay everything out for you and will specify if you need to pay special attention to not overmix, or making sure the butter stays liquid, etc. etc.

Very few people can “just eyeball it” and cook/bake (especially bake) well without using recipe measurements. If you want to adjust seasoning, or flavor components, that’s fine! But there’s no shame in needing to follow recipes to get the base down correctly. I’ve been baking/cooking for 10+ years and I have to follow recipes!

Try not to stress out too much about the end result! Baking and cooking can be incredibly therapeutic. Try to enjoy the process if possible! Put on some music or a television show/movie in the background!

Okay, that’s all I have for now, but go out there and bake! I promise that you can do it! As long as you have a good recipe and some spare time/energy, you can do it!

And feel free to contact me if you have more questions! I’m not an expert, but I’d love to help!