#probably crackish

[flamingpudding]

*hisssss* My comfort human!

Nightwing stared, he turned his head staring at Zatanna in a way that clearly spelled the question: Are you seeing what I am seeing?

Zatanna only gave him a shrug with a smile before focusing back on the meeting, leaving Nightwing to turn back and stare. He wasn't the only hero in the room with that reaction. There were a couple others too that reacted similarly. Only Batman appeared to be able to hold his pokerface.

Right before them was Constantine trying to explain to them all how their goverment basically fucked them over, while a 'ghost' teen was clinging to the man's shoulders glaring and hissing at them all. Worst of all Constantine was acting like the kid wasn't even there. Like there was no a white haired, black and white dressed teen hugging the man around his shoulders while glaring at them with glowing Lazarus green eyes.

"Uhm John? What's with the kid?" Green Lantern finally asked interrupting another one of the magicans rants about how screwed they were to which the Brite only glared at the hero.

"Ignore him."

"But..."

"IGNORE him."

"Maybe we should remove the child from this meeting before we continue?" Superman offered good naturally and Constantine looked pretty much done with them all, Nightwing noted. The blond waved with his hand as if telling them to 'go on try it'.

The heroes exchanged glances. Before Superman moved forward reaching out to remove the teen....

...and promptly got bitten. Nightwings eyes widened as he noticed the teen actually broke kryptonian skin!

The teen then proceeded to hiss at them while clutching onto Constantine protectively. The magican only let out a suffering sigh and muttered something about never touching a core again.

"My comfort human! Get your own!"

[finnitesimal]

Run From Me Darling (sorryyy im)

Prince Lindwurm AU but it's Cellbit as giant feline creature known to terrorize the land but by law, is the rightful eldest and while he can't take the throne, therefore needs a bride before any of his noncursed siblings can, so Princess Bagi has to get him married before she can sweep the neighboring Lady Tina off her feet

Unfortunately every potential candidate sent into the monster's bedroom disappears by sunrise, and the kingdom is getting desperate to find someone they're not going to find next to the rest of the dead birds and rats in the garden

Roier as a farmer's son offered up to pay off his family's taxes and consults the witch Melissa, who tells him to "strip him of his layers, whip him raw, and bathe him in milk" which all sounds really suspect in hindsight but hey it worked and he and his cat husband live happily ever after

[stories-of-the-multiverse]

"Man leave it to Lucifer's bullshit realm to make my wings less than useless."

"Can hardly move with the heavy fuckin' things, let alone fly."

[dee-morris]

Crackish Theory

but not really but maybe? Let me work through my thoughts and then you help me decide how serious I am.

I had a Shower Thought today about this ask.

"Never quite as good as he likes to maintain." Neil has also said that Crowley is an unreliable narrator when it comes to his Fall, and we know from the show that his story keeps changing. He sauntered vaguely downwards, he did a million light year freestyle, he only asked questions but he also rode into battle during the War. Hm.

My initial thought was that his memory had been fucked with, and he genuinely doesn't know. And this could still be true, probably is true, but I was scrubbing conditioner of of my eyes this afternoon and just started to wonder if Crowley actually did something Bad to get the boot?

I don't think I've ever seen anyone suggest this before, which is INTERESTING. We've collectively agreed that he's just a sad wet cat who would never hurt anyone, but my niblings in Christ, he turned a bunch of paintball guns into real rifles bc he thought it was funny. (I'm convinced that the only reason he made sure nobody died was the Look Aziraphale gave him.) Muh point izzz, what if he committed an act of sabotage in the course of investigating or poking around or building a suggestion box or whatever he did to get answers that pissed off the Metatron?

Or maybe he was a spy. Remember his Bond fixation? Maybe he worked undercover for Lucifer bc he was promised answers that the Almighty wasn't giving up. Once you let go of the idea that he's just a wee soft boi who only asked questions with big sad Puss in Boots eyes, the possibilities are endless.

As are the fic ideas. I think I've got enough material here to keep me entertained until filming starts, at least.

[7ndipity]

Leaving For The Military

Ot7 x Reader

Summary: How they would be with their crush or S/o before enlisting and how they keep in touch.

Warnings: none

A/N: Thanks to the lovely anons who requested this! I debated on whether or not I would post something about this, but since several of you asked, I decided I would. I did decid to make this more fluffy/crackish tho, cause I don’t want y’all getting too sad.(also, I struggled with this one a bit, so I’m sorry if it’s shit)

Masterlist

°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•

Jin:

I think back a lot on how he said before that he’s allergic to seriousness, so other than when he first tells you about going, I think he tries to keep things really light and upbeat.

Probably spends the whole week before leaving asking you to shave his head. “I’m not doing that!” “Why not? It’ll be a bonding experience!”

Leaves several little notes/letters for you(similar to his messages for Army) saying how much he loves and can’t wait to see you again. Plus, you’ve seen how frequently he posts on weverse, so you know he’s texting/calling you all the time.

Yoongi:

Since he’s in public service and getting to stay close to home(I think?), he really tries to avoid making a big deal out of it. Like, it’s obviously still a major shift in his life, but being able to still see/talk to you regularly would make it a lot easier.

If you live abroad tho, he would take it a bit more seriously, making sure the two of you talk as regularly as possible.(since they’re not allowed to travel abroad during service)

Literally keeps a list of things he wants to tell you/talk about whenever y’all call/video chat so he won’t forget anything.

Hobi:

He makes a point to spend as much time with you as possible before he leaves, making little bucket lists of things for the two of you to do together before and after enlistment.

Lowkey keeps flexing in his uniform(you’ve seen his insta, you know it’s true) “I look kinda good tho, right Babe? Babe?” *😑agrees but won’t admit it*

He misses you so much, and he calls/checks in with you every chance he gets(honestly, y’all talk more than me and my besties, lol)

Namjoon:

He’s rather solemn and serious about the whole thing, though he tries not to talk about it too much, trying to focus more on enjoying your time together rather than dwelling on what’s to come.

Y’all probably spent the whole night before he left awake and talking about anything and everything, not wanting to lose any time together on sleep.

Tries to call/message you as often as possible, getting over-excited to catch up on what’s going on in your life and share what he’s doing.

Jimin:

He spends the last couple days before leaving practically fused to your side, trying to soak up as much time with you as possible. He doesn’t say anything, but you can tell he’s anxious abt all of it.

Another that would probably leave you one, or more likely multiple notes/letters for after he leaves for you to read whenever you’re feeling down(totally didn’t read them all in the first week, wym?).

He messages/calls you every chance he gets(probs featuring an appearance from Jk, if it’s true abt them getting to stick together)

Taehyung:

He takes a semi-unserious approach to the whole thing. Like, he’s very sincere and open when you have the initial discussion about him leaving, but after that he’s just making little cracks about it here and there.

“You know, it’s kinda like the plot of a drama.” “It’s really not.”

He’s so dramatic abt missing you, calling you constantly. Another who would likely leave you little notes for when you’re feeling low, though his include random suggestions like eating at certain restaurants y’all like or watching your fav movies/shows.

Jungkook:

As we’ve seen with his posts from the past couple weeks, I think he would be somewhat somber when he first talks to you about everything and maybe again right before he leaves, but the rest of the time he’d try to keep things light and unserious.

(you know he’s constantly trying to get you to rub his head after he gets it shaved🙄)

Obviously, he misses you like crazy, but he tries not to let on too much at first when y’all talk, but it starts to show when he admits you’re always the first person he calls or texts.

Taglist: @sopebubbles-replies @btsw1fe @this-must-be-my-tardis @whitefoxgirl @bethanysnow @coffeedepressionsoup @main-bangtansmauyeondan @captainorangegoose @k4ngelz

[ncteez]

friends don’t fuck (l.s.m)

Your best friend of several years says that he can share a bed without being weird. Well, he’s a fucking liar. 

or the one where neither of you sees any harm in fucking just to see what it’s like. 

ao3 | minors dni! | kindly leave feedback and reblog, i will kiss your forehead so fucking fast if you do. 

WORDCOUNT― 3.7k

PAIRING― seokmin x afab reader

CONTENT― first time with big boy bestie, crackish, fluffish, mostly just smut 

NOTE― im just in love with him bro. i know that i’m typically more known for writing plot and/or really detailed smut scenes with a bigger word count but i’m having fun relaxing and writing these little fics in my free time (ㅅ´ ˘ `) , which means this is not proof read.

smut tags under cut:: 

smut tags― soft top seokmin, he gets a little lost in the sauce, BIG DICK BESTFRIEND, seokmin loves boobs, unprotected sex, cream pie, lil tiny bit of finger action 

~

           The couch is uncomfortable. That’s his excuse.

 “Well, you haven’t complained once in the years you’ve been crashing at my place.” You argue, sizing up your taller best friend who just so happens to already be tucked into your bed and spread-eagling it. 

 “I’m complaining now, though,” Seokmin yawns, stretching his arms and legs out even further as if to kick you onto the couch, “c’mon, I won’t be weird about it.”

          You size him up once again. Never did you make him sleep on the couch because you thought he would be weird about it, usually it was just because the bitch is a blanket thief.

 “Fine,” you relent, sliding yourself onto the bed and using your entire body to shove him over to make room for yourself, “the least you can do is make room for me.”

             He chuckles, deciding to stop being annoying and scooting over for you, and then casually rolling over so that his back is facing you, implying he’s actually going to sleep.

             So, there the two of you are. Not at all awkward, because you’ve been in worse situations with him that were a bit overwhelming (like that time he spilled his drink on you and mocked you for looking like you pissed yourself in the middle of a food court), this is nothing. It’s actually kind of weird that the two of you have never shared a bed considering the sheer amount of time you spend crashing in each other’s space. Guess it just never came up, guess neither of you cared too much about it. 

             It’s silent for a good thirty minutes save for the almost-muted Netflix show playing on the tv and your eyes are feeling ridiculously heavy. You can feel that heavy-sleep fuzz consume your body before you’re jolted out of it by none other than the fucking man himself.

 “Are you still awake?” your best friend whispers as he shifts on your bed, presumably turning to face you.

 “Trying not to be,” you mutter out in annoyance, staying on your back but turning your head to look at him with drooping eyes, “why, is the bed also too uncomfortable for your highness?” 

             He smiles and shakes his head, his eyes zoning in on your face and studying it.

 “I’ve been thinking about something.”

 “Well, can you stop so I can sleep?” You argue, not actually annoyed but just very tired. 

 “How do you feel about like–” he ignores you and pauses mid-sentence, which brings you to a place of curiosity. 

 “How do I feel about what, Seokmin?” You grouch, this time turning fully to face him.

             You take a minute to admire him, despite seeing him multiple times a week. He looks nice when he’s tired, and you’ve told him a thousand times how handsome he is. You really don’t think he gets it though, like, look at him. His sharp features always fall into softness when he’s just finished yawning, and his eyes always flutter differently when he’s sleepy. It’s not like you’re into him that way though, you just know how to appreciate an attractive person, regardless of if he’s your best friend and in your bed. 

 “I don’t know, me and Seungcheol were talking about how we lost our virginities and–” 

 “Why?” You snort, imagining that they probably were just rambling at each other for that topic to be brought up. 

 “That doesn’t matter,” he groans, waving you off and continuing his point, “anyway, he mentioned that he lost his to his best friend and I was like, woah,” he looks at you, watching for a reaction, “like, wouldn’t it be just so weird to have sex with a best friend?”

             You raise a brow at him and narrow your eyes.

 “I mean, to some I guess it’s weird, depends on the person?” 

 “Okay, but I’m asking you.” He prods, trying not to be obvious but ultimately failing. 

 “Nah, I think people can do those kinds of things if they both know how to navigate the situation,” you start, looking away from him because for the first time ever, you think he might be implying something. “I’ve never tried it though.”

             He deadpans at you before running a hand through his hair. 

 “So, you’re saying you could fuck a best friend?” 

 “Seokmin, you’re my best friend.”

             Then he’s silent.

 “I know.”

 ~

             You’re avoiding the fact that you’re shocked by his sudden sexual interest in you. This is the last thing you imagined you’d be doing on a regular Tuesday night sleepover with your best friend. Like, who even goes out of their way to ask for a major change in friendship dynamics on a fucking Tuesday!? 

             It’s kind of flooring, actually, enough to push you out of your sleepy daze and into a different sort of mood. The man who usually keeps you grounded is now somehow making you feel entirely off balance and dizzy at the very idea. You mentioned that friends can definitely fuck if they know how to navigate the situation. Now it’s like, do you know how to do that? Are you a person who can navigate this type of thing? Can you really just accept his offer simply out of curiosity? 

             Clearly, being friends with Seokmin has some downsides, and those downsides are usually fighting the yearly urge to pretend his face wasn’t the star of one of your rare wet dreams. That was completely unintentional! Another one of those downsides might be the occasional stray idea of what’s in his pants. That’s totally natural though! Your friendship with him is strictly platonic albeit occasionally full of sexual curiosity. 

 “What if we just pretend to not be best friends for ten minutes?” Seokmin offers through the past thirty minutes of silence in the room. 

 “Seokmin,” you start, feeling anxious because if he asks one more time you might just take him up on the offer, “if you keep talking we won’t be best friends for any minutes.” 

             You can hear that all-too-familiar chuckle from him, the one that’s deep and mischievous. 

 “You act like I didn’t see the way you looked at me today when I got out of the shower.”

 “And in what way did I look at you?” You feel a little called out simply because you didn’t even realize you were checking him out. 

 “Correct me if I’m wrong but–” Seokmin crowds up behind you considering you rolled away from him not too long ago, “you kind of seemed like you wanted to be under me.”

             Never has he ever spoken to you like this. Sure, there’s a sexual joke here or there. Maybe even a playful ass slap and a fake moan, but this? This felt a little too real, and a little too inviting. 

 “Wrong,” you argue as a last-ditch effort to save yourself from whatever it is that you’d definitely prefer to happen right now. 

 “Oh yeah? Is that why you keep rubbing your ass against me?”

             Goddammit. You were doing that, weren’t you? It’s his fault for crowding up behind you, all you were doing was– never mind that. The issue at hand here is you trying to pretend you’re not curious enough to absolutely fuck him. The even bigger issue is figuring out how this is gonna work, and if it’ll be worth it. 

             You pull your ass away for a moment, mostly to decide on what to do without feeling his–uh…thing against you. He shocks you though, by placing his hand around your waist and not really letting you. He knows you’re into it, there’s no way he doesn’t. Your best friend, the big bimbo man who also happens to go by another name of Seokmin, would never do something like this if he wasn’t already aware of how stubborn you are. Just this afternoon you eyeballed his snack and refused to admit that you wanted a bite until he basically force fed you. You’re stubborn, but he knows that you set boundaries seriously when he’s got the wrong idea. 

             God, you’re so in your head about this right now. Especially with him crowded up behind you, hands on your waist, his lips dangerously close to the shell of your ear. 

 “Okay,” you admit, defeated as you intentionally press yourself against him this time. “ten minutes,”

 “Yeah?” He sighs out, and yeah, you were right– he’s like right there. 

 “If you make this weird, I’m never talking to you again.” You attempt to argue, but there's a feeling in your gut that overpowers any type of anxiety right now. Maybe it’s because his hands don’t stray from your waist, and they stay gentle, or maybe it’s because his lips are immediately against your neck and he’s pressing his length against you. 

             Oh so you’re really doing this now? This is how he starts off when he wants to fuck someone? Your best friend likes to kiss and lick and suck against the neck of his interest while also letting them feel his size? Damn, okay. You’re trying to hold it together, honestly. The nearly muted netflix show that’s playing sounds as if it has no sound at all by this point because you’re entirely focused on the fact that this is the reality and you’re about to fuck your best friend for shits and giggles. You’re seeing him in a brand new light, and goddamn does it look beautiful on him. 

 “You know…” Seokmin whispers against the back of your neck as he plants a kiss there, his fingers running from your waist to your stomach and fiddling with the hem of your shirt. “I’ve never seen you without clothes on before,”

             He’s right. 

 “We agreed on ten minutes,” you say, still being a bit stubborn but also encouraging him to take your shirt off– or his pants, or anything else for that matter, “you’re taking your sweet time.”

             You can feel his lips against you turning into a smile and just as you go to try and make another snide comment, you’re grabbed by him and rolled over onto your back. He’s so quick with it, and seeing him now after already feeling his body against yours, he doesn’t look like your best friend. He looks like someone you desperately want to make feel good.

 “Up.” He instructs, lifting your shirt until it’s caught under your arms. You do as he asked, of course, and then lay back down feeling kind of shy about the fact that he’s blatantly staring at your chest and–oh.

 “God,” he groans, dipping down and nuzzling his face against them, “I knew they’d be pretty.”

             There’s that heat spreading across your cheeks. You’re blushing and feeling goosebumps run all across your skin and it’s making you feel kind of small but also kind of adored.

 “Ten minutes,” you remind him with a coo, cupping your hand on the back of his head as he continues to nuzzle and kiss against your tits, “get our pants off before you lose sight of the goal–”

             He pulls up, looking at you with a raised brow and a slack jaw. Then he narrows his eyes.

 “You’re really only gonna let me go for ten minutes?”

             Of course not. 

 “Ten minutes, firm. Unless you change my mind.”

             Ah, he does love a challenge, that’s true. Only this time you see this challenge as something more than a drinking contest or who can get the most kills in a video game. You swear he’s moving faster than he ever has before, navigating his big body and pulling himself back. He doesn’t even ask before he slips your pajama pants off of you, followed by his own. 

             You look down at him, now wanting your own curiosity to be satiated, but he’s still moving fast and leans down to your face, blocking your view.

 “Now, hold on–” you argue, shoving his face away and lifting your head a bit to see between his legs, “you can’t just whip it out and not let me see it.”

             He chuckles, because that’s fair. He pulls himself back, sitting on his knees between your legs and proudly presents his length to you. You stare, and then he stares. Both of you, stuck in a loop of taking in the other’s body and what there is to offer in terms of pleasure once you both have your fill of visuals. 

             His eyes go from your tits to your belly and then stop directly between your legs, and it’s like he wants to pray to the heavens for you wanting to do this because damn you look good. He wonders if you’re wet, or if you’re as excited as he is to be doing this with you.

             Then there’s you, eyes scanning his length and internally trying to measure the circumference of his thickness. He had a huge cock this whole time and didn’t even offer to let you see it before now? What an awful best friend, he should be ashamed for withholding such information about himself from you.

 “Hey, um–” you swallow around nothing, probably because your throat is trying to prepare itself for him. “not to be weird or anything but like, when did you get so fucking hot?”

             He smiles, giving you a breathy laugh before finally tearing his eyes away from your folds.

 “Why? Am I turning you on?” 

             You roll your eyes at that, leaning forward and grabbing his hand. He falls forward a bit with an excited breath and then immediately sighs out when he realizes that you place his fingers directly on your clit. 

             What you were gonna say was that he can see for himself if you’re turned on, instead, the second he felt it against his fingers, he slid them down and started exploring with a gentle groan. 

 “Good,” he compliments you, continuing to run his fingers through your folds, “can I kiss you too, or is that off limits?”

             You look at him like he’s an idiot, but he knows what that means.

             It’s silent when he does it. His lips laid against yours and feeling so plush and warm that all you can do is lick them until he lets you in. He does, and it’s really fucked up that he also hid the fact that he definitely knows how to kiss a woman from you too. From feeling his fingers teasing your entrance to feeling his tongue teasing your own– you feel elated that you’re getting this from him.

             The kiss lasts much longer than his fingers do between your legs. You felt the absence of them for a split second before feeling him slide his length against you and essentially coat his cock in your arousal. He’s thick, long, and incredibly hard against you. 

             You let out a strangled sort of groan feeling it, and you shocked yourself at the sound. Never have you been so excited to feel someone rubbing their length between your lips. He kisses you harder when you make the sound, and you can feel his hips press into you with more pressure. For a second, you thought about it. You thought about doing this for hours, days, weeks with him. Unfortunately though, you both have shit to do and it upsets you a bit too much right now. 

             You whine against his lips, bringing your hand up and pushing his messy hair out of his face to prevent it from tickling your own. That same hand drags through his hair, down his back, and then between the two of you. 

             His body jolts when you grab him, and he pulls back from the kiss with a dazed smile and looks down at your hand around him.

 “Do you want it now?” He asks, shaking his head at the situation, feeling like he’s on top of the world. Technically, he kind of is, because you’re kind of his whole world right now. 

             You smile back mischievously, lifting your hips a bit and guiding his length down. You’re incredibly prepared to feel him, to see him, and to know what it’s like for other’s when your best friend fucks them. Why shouldn’t you know, anyway?

             He nods to you, leaning his head down to your chest and attaching his lips around one of your nipples as he attempts and fails to find the hole the first time. You help him with a laugh though, guiding him a bit more until both of you release a sigh at the feeling of his head stretching you open.

             He now loses the ability to suckle on your nipple and instead drops his head to the side and treats your tits like a personal pillow as he focuses solely on the slide inside of you. He wants you to feel every inch of him, and jesus christ does he want to make sure he feels every inch of you.

             Taking his sweet time, he shallowly thrusts into you slowly until the last thrust, where he plants himself between your legs and wiggles his hips against you just to get a snug fit inside of you. You think he might be deeper than anyone has ever gone before, and instantly you’re gripping him into a hug as he waits patiently for you to adjust. 

             He’s silent for a bit, squeezing his eyes shut and reaching a hand down to guide your legs around his waist, and he only releases his own moan when he stops holding his breath. You do as he encourages, wrapping your legs around him and waiting for him to show you what he’s made of. 

 “You can move–” you say in a small voice, releasing him from your hug and brushing his hair out of his face once more as he raises his cheek from your chest. 

             He listens well, pulling his hips back and slowly sliding into you again. You can see his face right now and it’s different from anything you’ve ever seen before. He’s being passionate and it’s fucking insane to see him like this. 

 “You’re really hot, did you know that?” You compliment him, clenching around him and watching his breath hitch at it. 

             What you’re not aware of though, is how in his head he is about you right now. You’re so fucking wet for him and it’s driving him up a fucking wall. The drag of his cock against your walls is sending intense shocks throughout his entire body, and honestly, hearing your voice on top of it all compliment him makes him want to hate himself for never bringing this up to you before. 

             He doesn’t respond, and his pupils continue to grow as he looks at you with each thrust. He’s lost in the thought of getting to be inside of you specifically.

             And when he finds a rhythm, one that’s equally as hard as it is deep, you can’t even muster words for him. You’re breathless, moaning as his stupid necklace dangles against your face when he moves his hands to either side of your head to support himself. 

             You can’t really look away from him though. He’s never been this quiet before and he’s never looked this insanely hot before– you decide to stop thinking so hard, throwing your arms up and around his neck to pull him down into a kiss. His thrusts become slower at that point but still insanely deep. 

 “You’re going to make me come if you–” you whisper against his lips but get cut off, sighing with a slight moan as he presses harder into you.

             You don’t even think he’s listening, because now he’s talking. His voice is insanely deep and raspy when he does it.

 “You’re going to come on me?” He says, completely lost in his lust, probably attempting to say whatever is on his mind, “gonna come all over me?”

             Well, when he puts it that way. Hell yeah.

             You shoot your hand between the two of you and it’s like, three rubs of your clit and you’re already shaking. 

 “That’s it babe, squeeze me,” he chokes out, feeling your other hand scratch against his back and against his neck. 

             He watches your face as you release around him, studying the way you close your eyes and moan out for him. He thinks it might be the hottest thing you’ve ever done, come on his cock, you know? 

 “Jesus,” he chokes out this time, feeling you still squeezing around him as your legs start to shake, “okay, fuck, hold on–” he adds, now putting more power into his thrusts and chasing a high that’s close enough already.

             Good thing your best friend knows you’re on birth control, considering he’s the one who has to remind you to take it half of the time. 

             When he reaches his own orgasm, you’re just coming out of yours. You can feel his relentless hips stutter as he reaches it, and you watch the way he holds his breath through it. He’s literally not breathing when it happens and all you can do is, similar to him, fucking watch.

             You can feel his load pumping into you, and when he finally releases his breath, his groan is breathy and guttural before he practically flops down onto you and tries to regain his breath.

 ~

 “Ugh,” he groans out, refusing to remove his limp limbs from caging you in, “why was that so hot?”

             You’re taken aback by that for some reason.

 “The fuck is that supposed to mean?” You grouch, shoving him off of you and wincing at the way he slides out of you at the same time. 

 “I mean, like, how am I supposed to not want to do this again?” He laughs through his own wince, knowing full well that his cum is probably seeping out of you in heaps. 

 “Who says you’re not supposed to?” You look away from him, unprepared for conversation immediately after orgasm, but also slightly relieved that he’s back to his talkative self. 

 “Oh?” He smiles, pulling himself up from your bed and wiggling his brows at you, “So, now we are best friends that fuck?”

             You shrug, looking up and down his body.

 “Yeah, if you don’t make it weird.”

 ~

[prince-kallisto]

Crowley is Neige’s Father Theory (+ actual Neige backstory speculation)

You know, I was planning to make this an April Fools theory. I remember finding this headcanon about a year ago, and I’ve always thought it was a funny and cute headcanon to think about.

BUT THEN my hubby @snakevsnis utterly insulted my dignity and pride (kindly said the theory was my most outlandish yet) and I’ve decided to take this seriously. Not playing games anymore, I will collect every bit of flimsy evidence for this ᕦ(ò_óˇ)ᕤ

This all started out when I saw a closeup of Neige’s eyes to be honest haha 🤣🤣🤣 Why do they look like that?! What’s with that odd glow? All the characters eyes, especially in card art, are quite striking. But I’ve noticed that Fae eyes in particular have a tendency for a stronger glow or just overall more detailed eyes.

But anyway: dark hair, pale skin (this can apply to half the cast but SHH let me be annoying ahxhdbs) If you want to consider Disney’s Snow White, she has “lips red as the rose, hair black as ebony, and skin white as snow”, which we can keep in mind in terms of similarities🤪

People have always mentioned Crowley’s strange connections to Pomefiore and the Evil Queen- perhaps suggesting that he is twisted from the Evil Queen’s crow. Perhaps this, OR THIS IS ALL ACTUALLY A CONNECTION TO NEIGE.

The courtyard apple trees, the mirrors, the wishing well. Aside from the mirrors, all of these feel very reminiscent of Snow White, NOT the Evil Queen. The wishing well was indeed part of the Evil Queen’s castle, but it is Snow White who sings to it to make her wish. Crowley is very protective of the apple trees as well, and seems to honor them greatly. Neige’s first introduction through the commercial LITERALLY has the apple trees in the background as well!!

We also cannot forget his stupid vacation outfit (affectionate), which depicts a crow resting on an apple, and the background is riddled with flowers that look suspiciously like the ones from Snow White’s grave. And now with this uniquely yellow fit that no one expected Crowley to wear, Crowley technically shares the same exact color scheme that Neige (and this Snow White) does: yellow, blue, and red. In his vacation outfit, Crowley even ditches black as his main color and wears white instead.

Because what’s interesting about the Evil Queen’s crow is that the crow does not play a prominent role like Maleficent’s Diablo does. In fact, the crow almost seems afraid of the Evil Queen’s plans, shying away from the apple and afraid of her wicked transformations. In Twisted Wonderland terms, couldn’t that partially make Crowley more sympathetic towards Neige?

I also think it’s funny that Neige probably has the closest reference to a Disney character name, because “Neige” means Snow, and “Blanche” means White in French.His name literally translates to Snow White, and OF COURSE Crowley would name a child so directly after one of these historical figures 😭😭😭

And here’s where my theory gets even more crackish AJDNHDE, but when Crowley transforms into a ghost in the prologue, he notable has the cape of the ghosts in the Dwarfs Mine. The Dwarfs Mine we visited in the prologue is NOT the actual one used in Snow White- instead being a very convincing replica in honor to the Fairest Queen. But even so, there is a cottage that’s exactly the same as the dwarves cottage in Snow White. The ghosts from the prologue say that Ace, Deuce, and Yuu are the first visitors in “ten years.”

Ten years? Neige is around 17 or 18 years old, and his vague backstory heavily implies he’s been abandoned from his birth parents since a young age. So what if- hear me out- Neige for some reason was left behind in the Dwarfs Mine area when he was around 6 or 7 years old, entrusted to the ghosts before he met with his RSA dwarves?!

But let’s also take an actually serious look in Neige’s backstory. Neige’s backstory is shockingly vague, despite being the rival for Vil in Book 5. Book 6 seems to imply that Rook and Vil know more about what Neige went through, but it’s strangely cut off.

Neige has apparently been living with the dwarves and taking care of themselves on their own since a young age. We don’t know yet how dwarves age in Twisted Wonderland- Yuu remarks that they resemble Fae because of their pointed ears, and they may indeed be a type of a Fae. But even if they had the lifespan of Fae like Lilia, the dwarves are also school-age kids. And considering the lack of knowledge regarding Fae in TWST society in general, I wouldn’t be surprised if there were discriminatory laws preventing the dwarves being considered actual adults even if they were far older. The VDC competition shows how all the human audiences consider the dwarves to be cute children- likely even elementary-aged children.

I feel like this further validates the idea that Neige and the dwarves actually lived in the abandoned cottage in the Dwarves Mine- since it was a completely abandoned area, they were able to take the space without worrying over their young ages. The cottage looked abandoned in both Vargas Camp and the prologue because Neige and the dwarves are currently living at RSA. Additionally, in the Book 5 trailer, there were interesting shots of Neige and the dwarves at a bridge, a bench, and a forest. It felt overall very reminiscent of the cottage we see at the Dwarves Mine, so I wouldn’t be surprised if Neige and his friends actually occupied this space before

But with this in mind, how DID Neige secure a filming job or even attend the same middle school as Neige if he had no parental guardians or adult assistance in the first place? Again, I highly doubt that humans would ever seriously consider the dwarves to be Neige’s guardian on the small chance they’re older than Neige, for the same discriminatory implications that I mentioned above.

If Crowley was Neige’s father, I’m sure he managed to pull some strings in the background even if Neige was left behind for some unknown reason. Much like Diaval in the live-action Maleficent, Neige was essentially the Aurora that Crowley was taking care of from afar. Going back to Crowley’s vacation outfit, the crow resting on the apple reminds me a lot of Diaval in his bird form looking over Aurora in her cradle. I’m sure Neige has strong magic power of his own, but I find it interesting that he ended up at RSA despite most of his focus growing up was between his job and chores at home. Perhaps Crowley couldn’t get him into NRC, but did put in a good word for him with Ambrose and eased the application process for Neige

I also feel like Neige would indeed have stronger magic BECAUSE he’d be half-Fae like Sebek. His glowing eyes is the only physical indicator of his Fae heritage, but he also has the magic to boost.

And the most unserious note to wrap up this crack theory, they even have a similar taste in shoes because what is this 😭😭😭

This is all to say that I um. May or may not have been working on a chaptered fic for a long while now based on this premise of Crowley being Neige’s father so 😭😭😭 yeah. Um. Look forward to or dread that 🤣🤣🤣

(I will steal your kitchen sink if anyone says this is more convincing from my also crack Malleus and Crowley theories PLEASE 🤣🤣🤣 /j)

[wxnheart]

Hello! Can I request something from 141 and los vaqueros about a female reader who draws a lot? Also how they would react if they find her sketchbook and discover that she Draw them

𝐃𝐫𝐚𝐰 𝐦𝐞 𝐥𝐢𝐤𝐞 𝐨𝐧𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫, 𝐞𝐫… s𝐨𝐥𝐝𝐢𝐞𝐫𝐬?

note: this got a little crackish, so enjoy. lmao. though it's f!reader, I purposely made it gender-neutral for immersion.

Oh shit, they found out. Um... teehee?

You drew so much that it was second nature to you. You cultivated this talent of yours ever since you were young and it's helped you in more ways than one.

So when you developed an interest in drawing the members of 141 and Los Vaqueros, you immediately jumped on it and made the most of your subjects in amusing ways, and what did you do? Well, you got creative with your subjects.

And by creative, you initially started drawing everyone wearing Price's signature fisher's hat. Yes, even Ghost. You realized that it really balanced out the captain's bushy beard and Simon looked absolutely ridiculous in it. Rudy, uh... Rudy looked nice.

And then it turned into cat ears and a tail. Pawforce 141. (Don't ask)

And then you did a palette swap and oh, wow, they actually look pretty neat in some of the colors you picked out.

And then came... the maid outfits. That you, uh, drew while you were probably but most likely (read: absolutely) watching Titanic. Or was it watching you? Anyway, you may or may not have... emphasized their glorious physiques. Ahem.

And then you added Price's hat to the maid drawings.

Of course, whenever you think back to your drawings you had a tendency to smile or laugh to yourself knowingly. And whether you realized it or not, it piqued the interest of the guys.

This brings us to your current predicament. You know, the moment when you walked in the room and everyone turned to look at you. You were a little taken back until you looked at the table and oh shit—

shitshitshitshitshitHOWDIDTHEYFINDOUT?!?!?!?!

Some of them looked... less than amused ("Oh hey, Alejandro!"); the others didn't know what to do with what they found (Gaz looks... unlike Gaz) but one thing's for sure was that you could always count on Soap making you laugh; that's why you avoided looking at him. You just knew if you looked at the bastard both of you would die of laughter. Price was... really interested in your sketches.

And, oh, Ghost... Poor bastard.

The silence was deafening. The tension was palpable. The stares had become too much to bear—

"...You forgot the cigar. It sets the look off." Huh? Price sounded... amused. And the floodgates opened. Well, Soap's chuckle opened them up. That and the glare Ghost shot him. Alejandro cleared his throat. Rudy looked a little pensive and Gaz continued to look... unlike Gaz. And Price continued to be really interested. Was it the way you drew the hat?

You let out a breath you didn't know you were holding and laughed nervously. "I, uh... I hope you like them?" Smooth. Real smooth. Alejandro cleared his throat again—

"—We really look like this?" Oh, Rudy. Alejandro turned and shot him a glare. Rudy stared back, slightly nonplussed. "...What?"

Enter Soap and Ghost. "Well, I thought you looked nice, Lt.—" "Shut up, Johnny—" You should start wearing that often—" "THAT'LL DO." You tried your damndest not to guffaw but you did shoot a grin Soap's way. He shrugged. "Meant the hat, Lt." Ghost rolled his eyes in response.

In conclusion, they found out, shit's awkward, and Ghost looks good in Price's hat and a maid outfit. Teehee.

[craxkbaby]

kinda weird ask

How do you think Ak! Would react to meetinh another, happier version of himself?

(optional/crackish : If the alternate was kind, and invited him over for tea?)

Carmel, better not let me catch you in these streets../j. This lowkey made me sad to even think about (｡•́︿•̀｡) he needs a HUG!! I lived for the angst on here,

Jealousy, jealousy will flare up in this man’s soul. “How come he got the life I wanted?” He would definitely think.

AK!Jason would hold a heavy grudge against his happier alternate. He would definitely see it unfair, unfair how another version of him lives trauma free while AK!Jason holds bags of it.

He knows it’s not his alternates fault, he knows. But he couldn’t help but hate his alternate. AK!Jason would definitely think he wasn’t worthy enough to get a happy ending if another version of him got it instead.

I feel like AK!Jason would somewhat trauma dump on his happier version, “Oh yeah, went through a year of torture.” Type shit.

His alternate definitely going like, “oh!” Cause he never went through that. Hurts his heart knowing AK!Jason got the bad part.

They both know they can’t do anything about it.

Let’s go back to the trauma dumping. AK!Jason would somewhat do it on purpose, trying to make his other version feel somewhat guilty. Yes, toxic, I know. But I can totally see it happening.

“I’m trauma dumping so you can see what you took from me.”

He PARTLY means it. He knows his other version had no power of changing AK!Jasons fate. But damn, can you really blame him? Can you really blame him on the way he’s handling this situation right now?

We all know he’s being a a hypocrite right now. But, he will get over it. Will get over how this is his life, and how he knows his life is set in stone.

Though, if his other version of himself ever invite him over for tea, AK!Jason would probably decline. He wouldn’t want to be in the same room with himself for too long.

Please do not steal my work!! :3

I did not reread this so please ignore any typos!! ❤︎︎

[cdragons]

Saltburn Crack Incoming

Don't mind me, just going to give in to the Saltburn madness going around and write some Saltburn AU Crack!

Dear God @ethereal-athalia, I'm actually gonna do it!

We all know that Felix Catton is a dumbass with a savior complex, but we still love him, including me! 😇

But it cannot JUST be me who thinks that a good majority of students at Oxford probably HATED his guts. Especially American scholarship students. That's why I am basically making a very crackish au where Reader lowkey despises Felix's ass! I might make a couple of these, but the reader may or may not be the same reader each time. This idea was super funny to me, and I wanted to explore it. I do not intend to bash Felix, Venetia, or Farleigh; I might for James and Elspeth.

I also have a personal headcanon that Michael Gavey is on the ace spectrum, so I'll also include that in these fics. Some may be where he's straight. Who knows? 🤷🏻‍♀️

If this is something you think would be interesting to read, let me know in the comments if you want me to tag you!

Tagging: @aemondsbabe, @ethereal-athalia, @saltburnedme, @succnfuccubus

[s0ulryo]

Il Dottore Relationship Headcanons ‧˚♡⋆｡˚

[Dottore x Reader] Synopsis: General relationship headcanons with Il Dottore. Tags: Fluff, bit crackish, Dottore brain rot, soft headcanon. Notes: Possibly ooc? My mind is everywhere and nowhere at once. Also not proofread. I did this at 3 in the morning and I can’t feel my brain goodnight everyone.

(Reader is always gn unless specified otherwise.)

The beginning of your relationship was extremely slow, sometimes you wondered if you were actually in a relationship with the strange man or if you were just a glorified roommate. The two main causes behind this were his job and his inability to process love languages. 

He’s a Fatui Harbinger. None of them are mentally stable or have free time. Plus, we know that he pretty much was ostracized for his whole life; which has probably led to some psychological problems. So when people do things for him, he probably is extremely weary of them – thinking that they are doing stuff in order to use him to their advantage in the future.

“Dottore.” You call out, “I made your favorite.” “Why?” Dottore responds. “Do you need something? You could just ask if you do, there's no need to do such things for a favor.” “Dottore it’s 8:00 pm and it’s the first time you’ve been home in weeks, I missed you.” “Oh…”

He tries to keep you away from his work seeing how dangerous and unappealing it is from the general public’s perspective. He might even try to lie about it at first. (He's a horrible liar at times.)

“Dottore, why are there Fatui agents outside?” Picking at his nails he responds “Fatui Agents? Outside? Never heard of them. In fact, I’ve never been outside Dear.” You roll your eyes “Dottore they called you ‘Lord Harbinger’ I think you know who they are.” “Are you calling me a liar?” He scoffs, clearly offended. “Yes Dottore, I am calling you a liar.” “Rude.”

He told you about his affiliation with the Fatui twenty minutes later – it’s not like it was much of a secret anyways.

I believe he’d open up fairly quickly and be absurdly touch starved. I mean, he did enter a relationship with you, so he has to trust you to some extent. All he wants is a hug, so please just hug him.

He’s also a little shit when he’s annoyed by or at you. If you guys get in a petty argument he probably moves all the stuff you use to the high shelves (if you're shorter than him) or any area you would struggle to reach just so you would have to ask him for help getting the object down. He’s probably hidden the chairs before just to make sure you can’t reach what you need. If you are taller than him he would simply hide the objects you need so you would ask him to look for them with you.  

He’s made inventions as little keepsakes for you. He has things that remind him of you at his office, so he wants you to have things that remind you of him at yours. 

He’s kind of a big bully as a lover, he’d pick on you and not know when to stop; but if what he had said has hurt your feelings he’d do his best to make it up to you without apologizing. It’s not that he’s not sorry – he is, believe him. He just doesn’t know how to apologize.

I believe his love language is quality time or gift giving. He’s shit with words and doesn’t know how to initiate physical affection (it does get better over time, but it’s still not the best). 

I mainly believe quality time is his main love language because he’s not used to someone that willingly wants to be around him, and he finds the feeling to be addicting. If he’s working on something at home or on the off chance he has free time from work, he wants to be around you.

Overall Dottore is a soft lover who just wants to be affectionate with his lover.

[flamingpudding]

Glitterbombs for rogues

A/N: I got sick over the holidays. So I did not do any of the writing I originally wanted to do. So instead of that Christmas Story you get this Mark Rober inspired little tidbit.

Tim had a new favorite Engineer Youtube. The boy was a bit younger than him but a genius Engineer judging by the hand full of videos Tim had marathoned through. According to the listed self-introduction part of the video, Danny was currently an engineering student in Gotham with the goal to work one day for NASA. (Tim held out some hopes that he maybe could snag the kid for WE if possible. He had already sent out an internship offer after the third video he had watched)

Either way, Danny had potential and ideas that borderlined on mad science. But made his videos of his little projects even more entertaining and interesting to watch. Tim's favorite so far was Danny's explanation on how he reconstructed his toaster so that it would launch itself into space after the third his roommate burned toast with it. He did buy his roommate a new toaster at the end of the video though.

Still Tim liked this guy and his videos. So with anticipation he clicked on one of the newer videos. The title having caught his attention: 'Why Glitter'.

Instead of the usual introduction bit with little highlights of Danny's previous project the video started out with a big fat warning in red letter to not attempt to replicate anything in the video. That had Tim very curious already, but then a little video clip following that had Tim spitting out the coffee he was just sipping from.

Thankfully he missed spitting on his phone, still he jumped out of his cozy bed where he had been watching YouTube on his phone and hurried over to his laptop. The video, meanwhile, was continuing playing. He could hear the usual music from the introduction part as well as Danny's voice explaining his reasosn -which were valid, Tim had to agree with some of them- once that part was done.

By now he had fired up his laptop and was researching. The video in the background was explaining how Danny had build his Glitterbombs similar to the once another youtuber had but slightly modified them since he was not going to use fart-spray. Tim eyes widened as he found the first correlating news articles, wondering how they hadn't seen them sooner, but a glance at the date revealed that they were only posted a couple of hours ago.

Danny in the video was no explaining about his fist chooses victim and Tim dived onto his bed from his desk to get his phone back in his hands. Wide eyed, he watched as Danny obviously with a GoPro strapped to his head, crawled through what looked like an air vent. Once he reached an opening he looked through the slits into what appeared to be Riddlers hide out. Danny took the Camara of his head so that he could grin into it making the sign for silence as he barely contained his own chuckles. The other then waited for a moment, the camera work now getting wonky and the video even glitching out but a second later Danny was back in focuse before pointing down and then directing the Camara to his view. There in Riddlers hideout now sat Danny's self engineered glitterbomb.

"No he didn't..." Tim muttered as the video cut to a different scene. Danny was now walking through the sewers, humming cheerfully while explaining why he chose who he choose.

Another cut and... Tim spluttered. How the hell did Danny manage to just walk into Arkam?! So he hadn't seen wrong at the beginning of the video.

Growing paller with every cut on how Danny delivered his self-engineered Glitter bombs, Tim started to fear for his new favorite youtubers safety. Thankfully he had already done his work on Danny's person when he sent the internship offer. Now he just needed to get Danny to freaking safty.

He dragged himself to his laptop still in disbelieve as various clips of the rogues getting glitterbombed from the bombs perspective started playing. And yep, he definitely didn't see wrong now in the beginning. The Joker was one of Danny's chooses victums. Aside from the fact that he was so going to download and save that video for eternity as well as share it with his brothers and friends, (because as funny as it was that most of them were Gotham rogues, Luther and another millionaire by the name of Masters had also been made victims.), he still had to figure out how to ensure this definitely insane youtubers safer from the warmth of 90% of their rogues now.

Great newly discovered favorite youtuber has just painted a big fat red target on himself.

Tim was just about to call everyone in when a bonus at the end of Danny's video started to play.

He recognized that safe house.

He recognizes the weapons displayed on the walls also.

Oh... that's...

Still laughing Tim still sent out a message to everyone. When asked why all he did was sent them the link to the video with to timestamps.

The first one of the Joker getting glitterbombed

The second one being Red Hood getting glitterbombed.

[killerkillerkillher]

Expect some Bound to Fall in Love within the next 24 hours. This episode is alotta lore, a hint of crackishness (I hesitate to say crack bc comedy is subjective, but yall seem to think me funny LOL), and getting this out the way will open room for a few other ideas I was cooking up within the au like (and not limited to):

● obligatory jealousy episode. B/c what do you mean they have to share you???

● reader maybe/probably/almost dies again but the boys aren't ready for that yet (they might be enjoying the time they have with you here on earth, but don't tell them I said that)

● "Kids, this is how I met your daddy, and your da, and your pops, and your other dad." (Reader babysits and the boys get baby fever)

● lore, lore, lore. (The boys knew each other when they were alive obviously (but they don't quite remember that (you thought I was just getting silly???) (I'm a lore WHORE unfortunately)))

● the introduction of Priest!Graves. I have a feeling he won't be the biggest fan of you or your "friends".

● kissing, kissing, and falling in love. (Boys relearn what it is to cherish the fragile, finite experience that it is to live as a human)

● they meet your family.

● reader probably accidentally kills someone again. You just can't help being a sinner.

Anyway, those are just some ideas I have. Not saying they will all happen, but ya know🤷🏽 we'll see. If yall favor any of these lemme know.

And don't worry, Priest!Graves is most likely appear :D👍🏼

[the-paper-monkey]

hello! what would you say is the best draco characterisation you’ve ever read in a fic? and what have you read recently that you really liked and would read again?

also, i love everything you write :) thanks in advance!

I once saw this fanart that depicted the three main forms of Draco in Drarry and I have to say it's the most accurate thing I've ever seen lmao. My personal preference is somewhere between 'nutcase' and 'fake it till you make it' Draco. For light-hearted fics, I like those that capture the meanness of Draco's humour and his difficult personality; for serious fics I enjoy those where he truly wavers on the line of moral ambiguity.

Away Childish Things by lettered

Harry gets de-aged. Malfoy has to help him.

A great exploration of all the parts that make up the whole of Draco Malfoy.

any day now by oknowkiss

Draco Malfoy considers the circle.

I like this Draco for his moral greyness, self-preservation, internal conflict and risk aversion

Temptation on the Warfront by alizarincrims0n

Draco Malfoy is forced into hiding with the Golden Trio and dragged into their search for horcruxes. What ensues is a journey of redemption, unexpected friendships and an unwanted, turbulent romance with Harry Potter. Warnings for swearing, sexual content, and dark themes.

This is probably one of the most plausible DH-era Draco's I've ever read. The way he speaks to Hermione alone is enough to put it on this list. It's rare to find contemporary Drarry fics that are willing to commit to his nastiness and bigotry.

Such Great Heights by aideomai

Draco Malfoy, wide-eyed and pale and in a decidedly ragged shirt, was crouched next to the pile of whatever the dragon had been eating. Harry threw himself to a halt and yelled, “Merlin, how many times do I have to save your life?”

Draco's crabbiness and difficult personality here is so good. This Draco has always been a major influence for me. This line in particular is iconic:

“Due respect, sir,” Draco said, because apparently even weird romantic feelings or whatever they were weren’t enough to keep Draco from throwing Harry under the bus the moment an authority figure appeared, “I haven’t done anything. I’ve been working nearly non-stop the past few weeks - you can ask Mr Borgin—”

Lorelei in the Menagerie by BelladonnaLee

"I think my dead son is haunting the manor," says Draco when Harry runs into him in an antique book shop. Driven by yearning and suspicion, Harry offers his help and is drawn into a web of secrets and half-forgotten nightmare.

I think anything I say about this fic would be a spoiler but I really enjoy Draco's twisted grieving here. Also considering my usual character preferences, I think you'll see why I like this one so much if you read it.

Heal Thyself by astolat

"Are you going for the course?" Lovegood asked. "You have the NEWTs.”

“What course?” Draco said, then, “No, don’t be ridiculous,” when he realized she meant the notice pinned up on the board he’d been staring at: Applicants To The Introductory Mediwizard Course For The Coming Term Shall Present Themselves In The Chief Mediwizard’s Office By August 24th.

“Oh, I thought you might,” she said. “Well, goodbye.” And off she wandered again in her addled way.

Amoral, ambitious character accidentally becomes a good person in their pursuit of status/money/power is one of my favourite tropes. It's also why I like Tom Riddle Snr in In the Bleak Midwinter so much. Astolat in general writes a great Draco.

What We Pretend We Can't See by gyzym

Seven years out from the war, Harry learns the hard truth of old history: it’s never quite as far behind you as you thought.

Despite the heavy sounded summary, this is actually a crackish humour fic. Certainly an excellent example of nutcase Draco. The villain reveal at the end is 100% my favourite part I stg.

[halfagone]

That was a hilarious response! So how do you think the Avengers would refer if they found out about Phantom’s power set and the villains he’s been able to defeat in the past?

I know I usually have superhero teams act surprised and shocked when Danny reveals the truth or shows off some of his powers. But I think a funnier option for this already crackish storyline would be for the Avengers to just... accept it. Danny does something incredible, and they just stand there and nod along like, "Yes, this makes sense."

It would be even more hilarious if they're relieved. They've been so worried about this civilian kid for all this time that now that it's revealed Danny actually has experience and powers that can protect him, it takes a load off their chest. Obviously a number of them would be Concerned about the implications later on; Clint and Scott both have kids, Steve and/or Bucky would probably be concerned about another lab experiment situation, Tony would be appalled by what led Danny to getting powers in the first place.

It would be interesting if Wanda and Quicksilver (he's alive because I SAID SO) actually bonded with Danny over it. I think Thor would definitely want to swap tales of great adventure and cunning with Danny. Again, totally normal behavior for human adolescents, as far as he's concerned.

Just a little more humor for an already goofy AU XDD

[agrazza]

hello i am supposed to be writing ch. 40 of "On Darkness" but instead all i can think about is a crackish-drabble, themed like the snickers' 'you're not you when you're hungry' but its durge/astarion and the tadfools eventually giving up on their whole disgust of the vampire-feeding thing. because somebody needs to manage that pile of sarcasm and sass and theatrics and if drinking a little blood does it, they're all for it. they start out noticeably disgusted by it but by the end are actively solicitous, like the equivalent of getting Astarion a napkin and silverware, karlach being like 'time for dinner' and putting the durge directly in astarion's lap (or vice versa) when astarion has pissed off one too many harpers with his bad attitude, etc etc. (obviously durge has made it very clear that they are 100% down with this)

(with a bonus of it going the other way, too, with my own version of the durge. durge (Tavran Gregory) will straight up forget to eat unless someone puts it directly in his hands. tadfools quickly pick up on the fact that the best person for the job is in fact astarion because tav never sees the vamp trying to 'handle' (read: take care of) him as patronizing, even tho he gets frustrated if anyone else tries it.)

will i waste writing time on this instead of finishing out my Dalyria pov chap? probably.