#shockingly not really spoilers for once?

[egophiliac]

With the best of your writing or drawing ability, how do you sum up Twisted Wonderland Book 1 till Book 6?

I'm so sorry to make you wait so long for such a stupid joke

[raven-at-the-writing-desk]

You wanna know what I just realized....You know how in chapters 1-4 MC/Yu kept asking Crowley to go home. But Once Chapter 5-7 they stopped asking to go home and gave up. Why? Did they just change their minds once they got friends or did they just give up on trying completely until Orthro put it back in their brain? Or Did they just gave up on asking adults period?

Oooh, interesting topic 🤔 I went back in each book to see when instances of Yuu asking about going home were brought up and (shockingly) this actually happens very little, maybe a few times max in the main story (not counting the prologue):

***Main story spoilers (INCLUDING book 7) below the cut!!***

In 1-19, Yuu does NOT ask Crowley; Crowley is the one who brings the topic up. He claims he is in the library to research a way to send Yuu home, and definitely is not reading the latest edition to a new novel before anyone else (which, come on, we all know Crowley is just giving a convenient excuse for himself). Crowley's presence here is then used to inform us of a way to dethrone Riddle via duel.

In 2-4, Yuu DOES ask Crowley when summoned to his office. Crowly then says he is busy preparing for an inter-dorm Magift/Spelldrive tournament, so he hasn't made any progress for Yuu. In 2-14, Yuu also wonders about when they will be able to go home while talking around the campus at night, but does not discuss it further with others.

In 3-6, Yuu does NOT ask Crowley; again, Crowley is the one to bring up the topic when trying to get Yuu to convince Azul to stop his shady dealings. He uses their rising food bills and all that "effort" he's putting into researching as a means to guilt trip Yuu into agreeing.

In 4-2, Yuu DOES ask Crowley if he's actually researching. This occurs because Crowley is all decked out for vacationing in a tropical destination, so Yuu of course questions whether he's doing any real work. Crowley defends himself by saying "When in Rome, do as the Romans do!" and that he's broadening his knowledge base by researching in a southern region.

After book 4, there are no new explicit or even implied scenes of Yuu asking Crowley anything about home. However, 5-33 does feature a flashback to the prologue in which Crowley is struggling to find Yuu's home on a map.

There isn't really a strong mention of Yuu going home in book 6, unless you want to count Yuu talking to Mickey through the mirror and wondering what's on the other side.

7-10 and 7-11 has Ortho to concluding that the mirror with Mickey could be a "connection" to Yuu's original world, and can thus serve as a route home.

Most discussion of Yuu going home is concentrated in the prologue (as it is an important piece of the set-up and explanation for Yuu's presence in Twisted Wonderland), as well as book 7, when the issue becomes very relevant again. There is the occasional instance of Crowley using "oh, there might be information here about a potential way home" as an excuse to rope Yuu into an event's story (ie Glorious Masquerade), but nothing meaningful ever comes from it. These are just contrivances to bring Yuu and Grim along for a more immersive self-insert experience.

If you want a boring answer as to why Yuu asks/seems to care so little about going home and stops completely by the start of book 5, I would wager it's the metacontext. Even in books 1 through 4, Yuu going home is mentioned like maybe once and then is dismissed for the rest of the book. You’ll also notice that in these instances where Yuu going home is mentioned, they are almost immediately then used as a springboard to propel the problem of the week onto them to resolve. Yuu going home isn’t a plot point for most of the main story, it’s a plot device to force Yuu into an OB boy’s path.

There is very little urgency granted to finding a way home because you, the player, WANTS to be in this magical world even if Yuu, the actual in-game character, may be uneasy being away from their friends, family, and home world. Yuu's unease is most likely not depicted or not frequently brought up because it would interfere with the player's enjoyment of the escapism to another world. These desires very obviously clash with one another. However, because the game itself is trying to tell you its story, it has to provide a reason (no matter how nonsensical it is) for there to be no progress made in the search (thus keeping Yuu in Twisted Wonderland), and that reason often happens to be Crowley's incompetence. This is not true of all iterations of Yuu (as the light novel has a strong focus on Yuuya’s anxieties about being in a new world), but it must be this way specifically for in-game Yuu since they are the most easy one for players to project into.

If you're looking for a meatier answer, consider this: book 5 is the turning point in the main story. Before book 5, Yuu seems to defer to Crowley for finding a way home. They don't really wonder or investigate into this area on their own. By the start of VDC/SDC training, it's mid to late winter, or about halfway through the year. Given that Yuu is incentivized by the promise of renovations to let the NRC Tribe boys use Ramshackle as their base of operations, I get the impression that maybe Yuu thinks they'll be stuck in Twisted Wonderland for longer than initially anticipated. Rather than an "I give up", it feels like a "boy, this is taking a while so might as well upgrade the accommodations and make myself as comfy as possible while I wait it out" This thought is helped by the fact that book 5 is also the first time when both Yuu and Crowley don't mention them going home, but also nothing disparaging or hopeless is referenced. As I've said before, we still get a flashback from Yuu which is centered on them going home, so it's clearly still a topic on their mind. It's just not consistently shown to us so as to not interfere with players self-inserting or to avoid making the gaming experience not fun by focusing on Yuu's distress or worries.

Many other significant things happen in book 5 which makes it the "turning point": Malleus reveals his true identity to Yuu, Grim finally going a little feral from the blot stones, and Yuu seeing and speaking with Mickey clearly. From there, Yuu starts thinking about the mirror and how it could lead into another world. They begin to take more agency in their own return, later confiding in their friends about Mickey and what he means for them.

Book 6 mostly glosses over Yuu going home because... well, let's be honest, there's a lot more immediately at stake with six students being kidnapped and experimented on. Yuu's focus and concern is on getting them (and especially Grim) back safely. They weren't thinking about themselves or their own situation back then, they were thinking of others.

Going home returns in book 7 because it has story significance once again. Yuu going back to their own world adds to the growing dread and sense of loneliness that our OB boy for the evening, Malleus, feels over Lilia's departure. It helps to push him closer to the brink of snapping. What's more, this contributes to the overall themes and questions that book 7 poses: those of farewells, change, and leaving friends behind. These are sentiments that Ace, Deuce, and Grim discuss in 7-17, and they parallel Malleus's own anxious thoughts. In all previous books, Yuu's own quest to get home is not closely tied to the themes of a particular book, or it simply was not relevant to mention (it would disrupt the ongoing conflict or pacing).

Finally, to more address each of the specific things asked by the asker (since I know the information in this post is sort of all over the place and might be hard to match up to each question):

[Yuu] stopped asking to go home and gave up. Why?

Yuu did not frequently ask about going home to begin with. (Again, likely because on a metatextual level, the story needs an excuse for Yuu, ie the player, being present in Twisted Wonderland and experiencing its happenings.)

At that point, it comes down to individual interpretation as to why, but personally I believe Yuu realized that the solution was more complicated than just poofing up a portal home, so they decided to make themselves comfortable while they waited for updates rather than keep asking only to be constantly disappointed. Later on, events going on around Yuu become too hectic for them to focus on their own wants.

Did [Yuu] just change their mind once they got friends?

Wouldn’t this imply that Yuu didn’t consider Adeuce and Grim “real” friends until the start of book 5??? I just don’t think that’s true; they were friends way before this point, not hanging out with each other for convenience’s sake. Why would they sit together at lunch every day? Why would Yuu try to help Ace make amends with Riddle? And why would Ace defend Yuu when Riddle insults their upbringing? Why would Yuu try to free the idiots of their anemones at the risk of going homeless themselves? Why would Adeuce use public transportation to go all the way from the Queendom of Roses to Sage’s Island because of a SOS text from Yuu? The same logic goes for the Ramshackle Ghosts, who are very friendly with Yuu and Grim. They play games with them, tell them about the school, and even do Yuu’s chores for them while they’re held hostage in Scarabia.

I also think gaining friends isn’t necessarily a strong enough reason for Yuu to renounce their old life and suddenly be committed to staying. Yes, it can be said that this could change depending on individual interpretation of Yuu—but assuming a very basic backstory, a regular person would not be so quick to forgo their old friends, family, etc. I don’t think new friendships are a significant motivator for Yuu no longer asking about home.

Or did they just give up on trying completely until Orthro put it back in their brain?

Yuu didn’t stop thinking about going home just because they stopped asking about it. Post book 4, they are shown to have flashbacks to earlier discussions of going home. Yuu hardly ever expresses thoughts about their original world or wanting to go back (most likely to not break the self-insert immersion of their character), so it’s easy to perceive this as “Yuu gave up completely/Yuu forgot about it until book 7”.

Or did they just gave up on asking adults period?

I believe Crowley is the only adult Yuu really asks about finding a way back. I doubt Yuu actually thinks all adults are as useless in this endeavor as Crowley is, but we aren’t ever shown Yuu communicating in this manner to other adults. Crowley is the only “required” adult to interact with on account of being the headmaster typically forcing you into the plot anyway. In conclusion (I know I keep bringing this point up, but it’s because I truly believe in it), this is all probably done for convenience and/or to allow the player to fantasize and imagine themselves or their own Yuusonas navigating these circumstances. They don't want to constantly keep the story gloomy by having Yuu angst about how they miss home or how badly they want to go back. They want you, the player, to enjoy the world and the people of Twisted Wonderland and never want to leave, even if it may be contradictory to what Yuu themselves fails to express in the narrative. This is 100% intentional, and it's made clear because it ties in very deeply with the themes in book 7, which is when the idea of Yuu going home becomes extremely relevant again. Book 7 creates an analogy between a digital pet that Malleus owns and how sad he is that its lifespan has to end, that the digital pet is just "fiction designed to amuse". This is also true of what Twisted Wonderland (the game) is. The player is in the same circumstances as Malleus, who is too attached to his fiction and doesn't want to let it go.

As much as the game's structure encourages self-inserting, it cannot be denied that, ultimately, the perspective of the player ≠ the perspective of Yuu. The player does not actually have to worry about never returning home or being stuck in a foreign world, at the mercy of strangers (which, if not for entertainment purposes, would be something truly terrifying to deal with). The player is glimpsing into this other world for fun and can step away whenever they want. Yuu can't.

askhdvasoydvuealalf I know this was a lot, but I hope it made sense and properly communicated my thoughts ^^

[mooncalf87]

Do you have any Zestial headcanons?

I am going to pull these all straight out of my ass because I have never given much thought on Zestial ✌

Ep 8 spoilers!

Hes pretty close with Alastor. They don't talk on a daily basis or stuff like that, but if either of them ever get in a tough spot, they will be there right away. Zestial is also a fangirl of Alastors radio show

Doesn't use them, but this guy has the biggest swear vocabulary in existence

acts as a father figure to Carmillas girls when they need fatherly advice

He likes the idea that Charlie has for the Hazbin Hotel, even though he isn't involved, he hopes that Charlie can succeed in getting Sinners into heaven

Has tried to play the piano. Sucks at it. Actually so fucking bad.

He spent a few days helping to rebuild the hotel

Was pretty worried about Alastor once he found out that he was missing

Sees Carmilla like a daughter

He has a natural opinion on the Vees, neither likes or dislikes them, but he does see lots of potential in their magic and power if they put it to good use

He loved playing cards with Husk back when he was an overlord, he lost track of him after his fall from power, but once he found out Husk was at the Hotel, he now visits for a game every now and again

There arnt that many Sinners left in hell that are as old as he is (he died in the Stuart era im assuming, due to his speech patterns. That's 16-1700s) but he is pretty friendly with the ones that died around the same time as him

He enjoys 1920-30s Jazz (Alastor introduced him to it)

He isn't a cannibal, but he enjoys to visit Cannibal Town because of how shockingly kind they all are

He doesn't own as many souls as other overlords, and the ones he does own, he treats with commen human decency. He only really gets rough or snippy with him if they try to take advantage of his kindness

Send me HC asks!!!

[thechekhov]

Dungeon Meshi: Quick Reacts (CHAPTER 1)

Hey guys, what’s up! I’ve been neglecting to read things for a long time, being as busy as I am, but I thought it was about time I actually consume some media instead of making it for once. That’s the healthy way of doing it, I hear!

Anyway, since I like to react to the things I read, I figured I may as well record my reactions to the manga known as ‘Dungeon Meshi’ or ‘Delicious in Dungeon’ as its localized title. 

You can read the manga on your own here! Or find it elsewhere, though I encourage you to support the artist as much as you’re able. 

I cannot promise that this will be an ongoing series, I just wanted to have a bit of fun with it. This read-and-comment liveblog will contain spoilers - obviously!

Let’s get right into it!

For the sake of clarity - this comics reads RIGHT to LEFT!

Immediately, this is way more intense than what I was expecting! I thought this was gonna be cutesy, but this is straight up intense! I wonder how the eating portion of the story will tie into--

ah.

Gotta say, this style is one of my favorites. This is such a simple yet expressive way of drawing characters, distinguishing them and yet keeping it mildly realistic! It’s a delight to see. 

The resource scarcity realism is.,.. impressive. I wonder if the author based it off of a specific videogame or a ttrpg? I know TTRPGs aren’t huge in Japan, but this really does have fantastically recognizable RPG vibes. 

This is great, but I have to comment on the fact that (unsurprisingly) this is such a Japanese array of foods. It reminds me of an izakaya menu. Specifically the ‘thick-cut bacon’ bit - what is called ‘bacon’ in Japan is not bacon as Americans know it. It’s the same cut of meat, but it’s not cured nor smoked... It’s simply HAM. 😂 

Shockingly, I really can sense that these guys are friends with just a few pages.

What do you mean ‘noo’??? It’s literally a giant ass mushroom 

I think I can honestly this this is the point at which I realized I might just love Laios. 

you may not like it, but this is the ideal man. rabid and ready to cook anything he finds at a moment’s notice. 

IT’S A WOK. I THOUGHT IT WAS A SHIELD. HE’S CARRYING AROUND A POT ON HIS BACK. Incredible.11/10

I do so appreciate the seasoned-adventurer energy here. She straight up said ‘oh huh this thing killed me once before! a traumatic memory! neat!’ and then got right back to it. 

Never have I wanted to create a character based around this whole concept more than I do now. 

oh I SEE. 😂

[aquilapolariz]

what’s gonna be left of the world of you’re not in it? (reiner braun x reader)

Summary: On the plane to confront the Founding Titan, Reiner thinks about how the cruel world doesn’t deserve you and how you don’t deserve to live in such a cruel world. What more, it's in this state because of his existence. Alternatively, Reiner is ready to die for your sake until he realizes you want him to live.

Warnings: Extremely brief implied/referenced vague mentions of self-harm, minor season four part three spoilers

Word Count: 1.8k | Read on Ao3 here or below the cut!

The hum of the airplane distracted Reiner from his thoughts and prevented the uncomfortable silence from being completely unbearable. He was the only one standing up, knowing if he let himself relax, he’d be stuck in that blissful state forever. So he never once rested, not since he departed Marley with Annie, Bertholdt, and Marcel. Every slumber was sleepless, except for the rare ones spent with you. Sneaking out under the blanket of the night and tiptoeing past your sleeping comrades of the training corps, your only worry in the world was getting caught by Shadis. He wondered how soundly you slept now. 

Reiner turned his head slightly, wanting to get a good look at your face and every emotion it held.

“ Kirei… ” your voice barely above a whisper. Reiner followed your awed gaze out the tiny window of the biplane. It really was beautiful, the flat desert melting away into the endless sky, the earth and the heavens coming together as far as the eye could see, ready to bear witness to an earth-shattering event that would define the future. Reiner marveled at how you could call something beautiful on the way to a bloody battle. Even in the hardest of times you could see beauty. Even in the worst of people you can see the good.

Your gaze turned to Reiner and he felt like you saw right through him. You took in his form, committing it to memory, feeling a wave of nostalgia wash over you as you looked at the ODM gear he equipped. Your voice sounded shockingly clear in comparison to the blurred noises of the plane, asking Reiner if he’d be okay operating the updated equipment. He only nodded, saying it wouldn’t be used for that long anyway. He wouldn’t be in his human form for more than mere moments. 

The realization showed on your face and your bitter smile reminded him of sweeter times. When your saccharine words reached his ears, prompting him to play them over and over again in his head. When he’d crack a stupid joke and your honeyed laughter would create the most beautiful melody he’d ever known. When your sugary smile gave him something akin to a toothache just because you’d give it to him every single day without fail.

In those halcyon days, you had reached out for him, and against all of his better judgment (and Bertholdt’s protests) he reached back, grasping for any semblance of his humanity through you, which you gladly bestowed unto him time and time again without even knowing it. He wondered if, now, you knew how much you meant to him. 

In the days spent alongside the Paradisian devils, he found his conviction within your existence.

Like when he first committed his heart to the cause of the Survey Corps and every time thereafter. Reiner knew the words well. Shinzo wo sasageyo , the commanders would yell with unfettered devotion, like they truly believed their cause was worth every resource, every penny, and every life given to it. Hearing these words, Reiner would dutifully place his fist on his chest just like everyone else. He glanced to his side without turning his neck to look at you, whose eyes were solely focused on the commander with a gaze burdened with responsibility and hope for the future. While you offered your heart, totally and willingly, to this godforsaken island, he offered his heart to you, a godforsaken devil. Still, he knew that he would be the one going to hell and that he wasn’t going to see you there.

Since then, it never did bother him to pledge allegiance to the unfounded wings of freedom. He offered up his heart honorably, not lying when he did, because he offered more than that- his mind, body, and soul- to you whenever he saluted. While everyone had their backs straight with pride in their walled country, his back was straight with pride in you.

Back then, he was fighting out of a sense of pride, duty, and responsibility. Now, he only fights out of desperation and contractual obligation, simply waiting for the day he will pass down the armored curse to another child, never even hoping for the ever-unattainable repentance.

He was once a warrior and soldier, but ever since leaving Paradis, he was nothing more than a dead man walking. You gave Reiner the Soldier a reason to keep going, and you gave Reiner the Warrior an escape. What was he to do without you? Without Annie? Without Bertholdt?

You were the anchor that Reiner tied to his brain. An anchor that never rusted no matter how many times it was thrown in the salty ocean of battle. And without you he was lost at sea, completely adrift with no aim. He could blame nobody but himself because it was he who severed the rope that held you two together, cutting it cleanly when he revealed his titan form, his armored face devoid of emotion, forever haunting your dreams. 

He thought maybe you were a figment of his imagination. Too good to be true, too kind to be real. Maybe you were just something his mind made up to stay sane. But being here, hundreds of feet up in the air, working with the people he was taught to hate, he knew this wasn’t something his mind was capable of conceiving. He knew this was real. He knew you were real.

If only you could have stayed within the confines of his imagination! That way he wouldn’t have to feel shame every time he looked at you, everytime he thought of you. But he deserved it. He deserved to feel the bile of guilt rise in his throat, his lungs on fire like he was ready to explode. He deserved what his worst enemies wished upon him and even more. 

Reiner was never worthy of you and never will be. You of all people should hate him more than Eren hated him. You should hate him more than he hated himself. For he had hurt you the most, and everytime he harmed himself an image of you in tears showed up in his mind’s eye. It seemed like every move he made, hurt the world and his world was you. Every mistake he made would cause you pain, even if you didn’t know about it. He wondered what you’d say if he told you how many times he tried to kill his guilt, and with it, his own life.

He wanted to make it up to you, even though he knows it’s impossible. All he can do now is fight. He'd fight against the founding titan for whatever fragmented shards are left of his duty. He'd fight for you so that you can live in a world where you’d no longer be on the front lines of a cruel war.

And ultimately, that is what kept him going in his mission. More than his mother, more than Marley, he knew that no matter what he’d still have you, or rather the haunting memory of you.

Even if he himself had mere years left to live, he wanted to give you an existence that didn’t seem like it would end every single day. A world without him. Surely, that would be salvation for you, right? A world where you didn’t meet Reiner or one where the two both of you wouldn’t get along so damn well.

He felt sorry for you. He felt sorry for anyone who could love a piece of shit like him. His mother, Gaby, Bertholdt. For he was nothing more than the scum of all nations, the bastard son of Marley and Eldia cursed with the power of the Nine. He was the harbinger of calamity to the island paradise you, and thousands of others, called home.

And so he’d fight for you and only you. For your future that didn’t have him in it. For your future where you’d no longer be forced to don a soldier’s uniform and dirty your hands. You were the light that was seeing him through to the end of this war and the collapse of the founding titan. 

The sound of Connie’s strained voice snapped Reiner out of his thoughts. Connie was confessing his sins, speaking on behalf of everyone else around him, finding the common ground between him and Reiner. 

Reiner looked at his own hand, pristine and never marred due to his healing abilities. With no scars, how was he to remember his own sins? How was he to remember each time he bit his hand to transform into a monster? Every person he killed mercilessly just blurred together in his memory, a haze of bones, blood, and bellows. “My sins are irredeemable, I will never forgive myself. But, at least, let’s save what’s left of humanity.”

You were what’s left of Reiner’s humanity. He looked at you and you made him feel as human as he was before inheriting a Titan. 

Everyone nodded, bodies tense and minds shocked at the realization that they are all the same- that the soldiers of Eldia were no worse than the warriors of Marley and they were stuck in the same endless cycle of war and hatred.

You grabbed Reiner’s hand, the one he was examining so intently. He noticed that your hand was the more calloused one out of the two. Your touch burned, permeating his smooth skin and branding it into his memory. You brought Reiner’s hand close to your chest, forcing him to a slight bend at the knees and a curve of his spine as your lips tickled his ear in a whisper, “Please, don’t die today.”

He furrowed his eyebrows. He already had one foot in the grave he dug for himself. Just a couple more steps and it’d be two feet in, completely buried six feet under. He believed it’d be okay for the ground to swallow him up after doing all he can to stop Eren. Then, he’d finally be able to rest in peace with no voices of the dead haunting him because he would become one with them. Surely, it’d be better for you, and all of humanity, if he no longer existed.

His confused expression took you by surprise. You said your words like they were the most obvious thing in the world: “Well, what’s gonna be left of my world if you’re not in it?” 

He remembered how he offered his heart to you many times. Everytime he held his fist over his ribs, he could never feel his heartbeat. But in this moment he could hear the rhythmic thumping of something in his chest, fresh air filling up in his lungs- the same that you breathed- and the blood finally moving through his veins after years of seeming stagnant. A warmth that spread from where you held each other’s hands filled his body and your intent stare stopped him from questioning if he deserved to feel this strange and foreign feeling.

Was this the urge to live?

[kayslibrary]

⋆𐙚₊˚⊹♡A night to remember⋆𐙚₊˚⊹♡

A/N~ hiiiiii guys!!!!!!! tis is Moi :) I'm back...I think. I try to incorporate writing into my schedule but I be getting sidetracked with life so it's kinda hard right now BUT I did draft up an apology for you people so hopefully you'll accept it <:) Anywho please enjoy

Ex-flings to something more perhaps? 

Based on the song; A Night to Remember by Laufey and Beabadobee 

Synopsis; y/n and George were flings at one point but, y/n broke things off when she found that both they and George were getting too involved they had a little falling out and were no longer sleeping with each other…UNTIL one night she heard a knock at her door and who was it? George. But why? Maybe he wanted to talk or more than a few words from her…. 

warnings- SMUT eheheh <:))/ reader is afab so just letting you guys know

⋆˙⟡♡✧˖°⋆˙⟡♡✧˖°⋆˙⟡♡✧˖°⋆˙⟡♡✧˖°⋆˙⟡♡✧˖°⋆˙⟡♡✧˖

Swore I'd seen you before 

There was a faint knock at the door, you open it to find the last person in the world you’d see on your doorstep. There were no words spoken for minutes that seemed like years. “George…” you sigh, breaking the silence, he says nothing but his eyes say everything, you step to the side so he can pass through and into your home.

Watched you walk through the door 

You watched, no practically stalked as you watched him make his way around as if he knew the place like the back of his hand. (spoiler; he did) “George” you spoke again, he turned to you without saying a word.

Something in your eye

Reminded me of somebody I used to know

He stares you down ever so slightly, his eyes displaying emotions you’ve come to notice over time, passion….anger…lust. you take the time to zero in on his features. His eyes, nose, lips, oh how you miss kissing them….so plump and soft. You snap out of this trance when you hear the floorboards creak and groan, “What are you-” he cuts you off by kissing you softly. 

You touch my back

I took your hand

“Fuck I've missed you” he groans into your mouth as his arm snakes around your waist. “Me too..me too,” you mutter without a thought. “y/n..can I? I need you so fucking bad” he pleads softly. You trace his hand as you look into his eyes once more “Yes” you confirm, solidifying your fate. 

 Something from your touch felt shockingly familiar

And I'd swore I'd seen you before

Oh, I swore I'd seen you before

You gasp when you feel his hand trail down from your chest to your stomach. his touch felt like sparks and lightening on your skin. “So fucking pretty…all for me” he purred. 

Underneath the sheets, you enchanted me

And whispered sweet nothings in my ear

“That's it..come for me pretty give me what mine” he whispers in your ear as you come for him for the 2nd time that night. “Fuck- fuck” you whine, his hand still working his magic on your clit. “So fucking sensitive” you choke out while grabbing his hand “No no..you can take it, take it for me like a good girl” George mutters “I can’t George please” you whine as he lets up and leans in to kiss you passionately. 

I shivered beneath you

All wrapped up in embers

You both lay in your bed under the blankets, you don't know how you got here but in your bed nonetheless, you shiver against him “Why are you shaking?” he asks, “m’ cold” you stutter in response. Instead of him getting up to turn up the heat, he pulls you closer to him. His hands wrapped around you, your head on his chest his heartbeat singing to you. “Why did you come back” you quipped, “I missed us. I miss being in your presence and you’ve been weighing on my heart.. literally” he jokes which causes you to both chuckle. “There was no us tho..” you lift your head, and he sits up straight to meet your face “I want there to be a ‘us’ if you’ll let me try” he smiles “Let me think about it……” you stand silent for 5 seconds. “We can work towards it George but I wouldn't mind” you propose “Really?” “mhm,” he cracks the largest smile he can muster as he attacks you in a fit of kisses.

⋆˙⟡♡✧˖°It was a night to remember⋆˙⟡♡✧˖°

I hope my apology made it to your heart and made you guys accept it because i really worked hard to draft it up :) no but in all honesty i FUCKIN LOVE THIS SONG anyways see you guys laterr

[littledead-ridinghood]

okay, on my last meta I said Bruce has made Jason cry before and shown a lack of remorse for the fact as he does in the webtoon, and @tumblingxelian asked if they could see my "crying Jason" folder for their comic analysis videos (which go watch them!!! They're very good and break down misconceptions of characters usually focusing around Talia Al Ghul, Jason Todd, and Stephanie Brown). Specifically, the ones where bruce makes Jason cry. There's a 10-panel limit so this will be two parts split up between part one: Adult Jason and Part Two: Child Jason. These panels are either because Bruce made him cry or Bruce is in relation to the problem of why Jason is crying (think Lost Days which will be in the next part).

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Red Hood: Outlaws webtoon; episode 10, "Like Father, Like Son"

Shockingly, this is not the interaction that sparked so much controversy over the last couple of days. People are more so focused on Jason's Robin portrayal and the modern version of "he's another speck of dirt that belongs in the sewer" dialogue (no that's not what bruce said in the webtoon, for transparency, but that's what the toddler quote reminded me of. Bruce, when really mad at Jason always circles back to him being "dirty" and a "destined criminal" which I can write a whole think piece about if anyone cares(please)). As I said yesterday, I have had and still have no plans to read this story, the summary never interested me when announced and now I'm scared, so, grain of salt, people!

Roughly, Bruce and Jason get into an argument over the outlaws incompetently breaking laws. To which Bruce treats Jason like how a sexist pig of a man treats a woman when upset (i.e. "are you on your period?") It isn't later revealed until the end of the story (about 6-7 panels later) that yes, Jason was in fact crying underneath his helmet for the majority of his interaction with Bruce.

Classic Under the Red Hood monologue. Bruce didn't make Jason purposefully cry here, he, they, are both just....really goin' through it. Jason is crying, Bruce can't even look at him out of guilt and shame. I don't think this one needs much explanation, Jason would rather die than live with the Joker continuing to wreak havoc, and if Bruce doesn't do it, that's fine, he will, but if that bothers the man then he's gonna have to kill his resurrected son (spoilers: He does)

Remember, folks! We end this monologue with a flayed open and dead Jason!

This one I didn't realize Jason was crying because the panel's so small on the actual page until a different person pointed it out and I was like "Holy Fuck He Is! *screenshot*"

This one comes from Event Levithan (2020) where Bruce asked for Jason's help with the mass killings that have been going on around the world until Bruce reveals his hand and accuses Jay of being the mastermind behind the whole plot. The idea that Bruce was going off of was that Jason was blacking out and doing it out of grief over Roy's demise or something. Not a strong case. But, yes, this takes place in the continuity when Jason is Super DisownedTM. When Bruce finds him I'm pretty sure Jason says something along the lines of "I'm surprised you want my help" (it's been a minute). Once again, Jason's fully prepared to ignore his emotional grief and work placidly with Bruce's team. He just wanted to help Bruce on this case before Bruce once again takes that trust and shatters it (Ex: Batman and Robin N52 #20, iykyk). You can see the dark tear on the black part of his mask when he realizes and questions Bruce about what he actually wants with him. Bruce then sends his detective team off to apprehend Jason, who escapes because even if this story has super janky dialogue and unclear art, at least we get competent Jason.

This is from Jason's White Knight spin-off. Total Elseworld, but the theme carries over, Bruce, this time in relation, making Jason cry. The dude's kinda fucked up from being tortured for, what is it here, 3 months? Jason gets tortured a lot, kind of a multiversal constant for the man. You know that trope in sportsball movies where the guy's like "I could've gone pro if not for XYZ injury and my dreams were shattered. Don't end up like me. Don't play this game; it's a waste of time!" before becoming the gruff reluctant mentor to said child? That's Jason's characterization here, but, hey, at least he acknowledges he needs help. Again, Jason is only the sanest bat because he's the only one, elseworld and canon, who I've ever seen remark on the fact that their person is so entirely messed up, sick in the head, and needs help. All the other bats are like "I'm Fine!" when they're clearly not fine. So, A for effort. Again, very UtRH monologue, more so having a breakdown in relation to bruce rather than bruce causing it. He looks so young and forlorn in the second to last panel, and so alone in the last :(

This is Scott's interpretation of UtRH in RHatO V1. Very pretty Jason, not what happened. This was not a scene, and the rest of this scene completely contradicts Jason's main goal in UtRH, but I can't resist a crying Jason panel. He's debating shooting Bruce, he won't, but this one, ONE, panel of Lobdell's UtRH retcon does, I feel, accurately represent Jason's feelings during his Lost Days/UtRH phase. Think of him putting the bomb underneath the Batmobile. He says he wants Bruce to die, but every time he has the ability to do it, Jason is hit with these overwhelming feelings of "No, I *Don't* want Bruce to die! I just want him to understand!" That's why UtRH is so intriguing to read because yes, Jason primary goal is to control crime because a utopia of no crime is impossible. Yes, he's also an 18-year-old who died alone, came back alone, and didn't legitimately regain his ability to function until late 16-early 17 with the whole new trauma of the pit. You gotta find that sweet spot of morality & philosophy juxtaposed against feelings & trauma. Very Man vs. God. Yes, he brought Gotham's criminal world to his knees. Yes, to Jason, he literally died like 18 months earlier whereas everyone else got a nice 3 years to process his death and move on.

Bonus classic "Jason is clearly devasted but not crying" panels:

Hey! remember earlier when I mentioned Batman and Robin N52 #20? Ya, that's this one! I love using it in metas because I feel it's often forgotten about. This is after the Death of the Family arc where the Joker says he cut off the bats' faces with a razor blade and was going to force feed it to them as well as Dick forced to go undercover by Bruce (everyone else thinks he's dead), and Damian's death arc. In RHatO V1, the clown almost kills Jason again via acid to the face, so he's in a coma having unreliable narration within fever dreams until he has a heart-to-heart with subconscious Bruce. He wakes up and has a heart-to-heart with Real Bruce where they bury the hatchet (Jason took all the blame for everything in their relationship (Bruce! slit! his! throat!)). Later, when Bruce drops Jason off in front of his murder location, that whole interaction reads Very emotionally manipulative and prime-y (which is why I can take neither the hug with dream or real Bruce with love. Again, bitchful Killjoy. sorry). I could talk about this forever! He's so heartbroken! On the next page Jason says "how he was ready to put everything behind him." and that he "was done looking back." Anyway, they fight. Jason throws the first punch and kinda sorta halfway misses and Bruce responds with a whammy to the jaw. Hitting him into the dirt in the same spot the joker did. It comes to light, implicitly, that Bruce didn't even want Jason there to reveal his murder, but because he knew it would trigger Jason to lash out at him. He was using Jason as a tool to punish himself. Jason commits mental suicide after this; enter: amnesia arc.

Again, no tears. But they're implied.

I wanted to put the entirety of RHatO V2 #25 here, but, because that is not possible, instead y'all get this third of a page where Jason's literally given up and dropped into unconsciousness to which Bruce finally stops beating him. ahhh family, you know, dragging them around like trash because you think they did something but also have a shit tone of pent-up anger over your failed wedding and the scapegoat just happens to get caught in the crossfire of everything, and oh! Look! It looks like you beat your kid to death with your bare hands! Oh My God! Jason predominantly doesn't fight back during this, hardly even defends himself. Jason doesn't cry when he's taking or taken hits. He just rolls with them. Whether he thinks he deserves it, taking the hits for someone else and wants to be a strong protector, and/or he grew u getting beat around a lot so he's used to it/doesn't want to give [them] what they want/knows it'll only make it worse/etc etc. (*whispers* he's a child of severe abuse).

Jason is characterized as someone who is super smart, logical, and pragmatic, but he also acts with his heart a lot. He wears his helmet because as much as he tries to hide his true feelings, he has never been able to consistently hide them from his face and sleeve. Jason gets pulled in multiple directions by who he is and by what a bat is supposed to be, and I don't mean that just kill or no kill. That is not the only line that isolates him from the other. Part is due that the majority of the bats joined and formed in the wake of his death, but also a lot of his internal working seem very not bat-stereotype no matter how much his external is. I will always go back to his freedom of emotional expression on this as it's such a huge part of his character that other bats constantly rag on. For another example, for as many trust issues he has and as many times his trust has been broken, Jason, as opposed to many of the other bats, consistently puts himself back out there to trust people again and again, even if it's the same people who have abused that trust. Jason continues to try to fix things with Bruce, he continues to help people who have tried to kill him before, multiple times even (Think Duela and Suzie Sue), he tells his non-superhero friends who he is (think isabella in V1 who really wanted that openness from Jason and he gave it to here), and he continuously places complete and utter absolute trust in the teams he runs with. Artemis even said, roughly, in V2, that "as much as he tries to pretend he doesn't, Jason cares a lot. Takes every hit to the heart." And that's just a whole long-winded way of saying I like that Jason cries a lot because that emotional rawness of overwhelming emotion is really cathartic to read. I've read metas and commentary on it where people complain that Jason cries too much and it makes him pathetic and weak. I disagree. Jason has always just been like that, and this segues into Part Two! Child Jason crying about Bruce

[lurksunderthebed]

MWIII Ghoap Drabble

Major Spoilers Beware!!! Canon compliant. Set between Trojan Horse and the Ending scene. No comfort, all pain.

It's cold.

Ghost didn't expect that. He's bundled up in all his blackened layers. Swathed in all the armour he can find, bar wearing his actual kit. Yet the kiss of that chill still slithers down his spine. Jagged tendrils of ice widen cracks in his exposed shell. It's only a matter of time till he breaks. Ghost can tell.

Price and Gaz are here with him. Dressed in their finest. Ghost sticks out like a sore thumb. But the thought of putting on his No.1s and having everything out to show, to have his grief, once again be publicised makes something in him want to hurl and scream and cry. The only one he'd ever let see him like that was not here. He'd never see him again either.

A sound comes from clenched lips.

Ghost ignores it.

He refocuses on the dark chestnut in the room. It's shockingly rich in an otherwise sterile beige room. Ghost should really be used to this. But Ghost had also never let himself get this close.

It was a mistake and yet—

And yet Ghost would—

Enough.

Johnny deserved more than this from him.

He'd told him that they were a team. Johnny was his responsibility, his cross to bear. Watching him was the last thing he'd do for him. The one thing he'd failed to do properly.

Ghost wouldn't fail him now.

A mousy woman dressed in black is waiting for him to the side of the room.

He nods at her and she moves it into position. Ghost's eyes critically watch her every twitch, sniper steady and intent. She swallows nervously at his stare.

Credit to her professionalism, she does her job. The sleek silver of the machine stands out in the careful blandness of the room. A room that was decorated so delicately and purposefully stale. Ghost hates it.

He hates how it looks. So jutting and off-putting in this careful room. Like masking a hideous thing in silk and asking everyone to pull wool over their eyes. To pretend like this was something pleasant, planned, prepared for. It's a reminder of all the wrongness Ghost has felt since.

The mousy woman comes to stand closer. It's a fair distance away from him, as if she could tell he was some sort of thing collapsing and diseased—more like a wounded animal slated for destruction than anything resembling a man.

"Whenever you're ready." She tells him in a quiet murmur. Her eyes are carefully hidden away from his, head lowered in supplication. It's a fragile silence made even more delicate by her sympathy.

It burns, that sympathy. Ghost wants to snarl at her. Bite and howl. Rip apart his enemies and drag them down here to lie instead. Hunt all those who played a part and tear them and then himself to shreds.

But he can't. Not yet.

The thought rips another noise from his throat.

The woman flinches at the noise. Ghost stands stock still, muscles tensing and relaxing in an effort to control himself. He's never been so visibly agitated, so violently out of his own preternatural silence.

Price and Gaz shift nervously at his side. Their eyes betray their worry, their grief. Ghost hates this too. The lines of despair written so plainly on his body were obvious to anyone who saw him now. The bitter irony of it doesn't escape him. For all of his efforts to hide away, he's as exposed as he ever could be. Stripped down for all his ugly grief to be shown and exhibited.

His mind catches on the thought, tripping over the idea of those glances, the sympathy and all that pity directed at him. All those eyes sliding over the raw sores of his open wounds, tearing into his exposed flesh.

It freezes him, his breath hitching in panic. There's something hurt nesting in his throat this time.

Johnny.

The panic crests and Ghost squeezes his eyes shut. It's a stuttered half second before muscle memory orders him back to the present. As it always was, Ghost's leaden gaze fixes to him, something easing at the sight as he did. Even now. The rich browns remind him of his duty.

Ghost lays a heavy hand on the shiny polish. The paleness of his skin stands out amongst the chestnut. A whisper of a memory catches.

There's a laugh hovering around his ears, cocky and bright. Those black strands shining in the morning light turns into a rich chestnut brown. Scarred fingers catch the tip of a careless lock, eager to take a little bit of sunshine for himself. The contrast of their differing colouration catch his gaze instead and he finds himself marveling at how vibrant it was. Another laugh sounds.

"Simon." The shade whispers. "What are ye doing?"

Ghost jerks. His pale hand lies limp like a deadened husk on the casket. The gleaming silver of the cremator hangs in front. Johnny was gone.

He drags his hand off the chilled wood and glances at Prize and Gaz. Price's gaze sears; Ghost can see the mirrored guilt in those depths. Gaz's is all one jumble of pain, helpless anger bordering the sides of it. There's something so young about his expression that instantly shutters Ghost. He is abruptly reminded of himself at a younger age, before loss shaped his form into something unrecognisable.

Today was no less different.

There was still something in Ghost's fevered mind whispering Johnny's honeyed words into his ear. The sickened part of him that never wanted those last caresses to leave, hoped it was permanent. If Price had any inkling the man kept it to himself.

Ghost understood implicitly that Price knew more than he let on. Both of them were seasoned at breaking men apart; they could recognise when one was about to crack. Now, however, was not the time. Not now.

Price holds his gaze and nods shallowly back to him. Gaz follows suit. They stand at attention, posture perfect and ready.

It's time.

Ghost lingers on the lacquered wood for one final glance. His masked face stares back at him, distorted by the light reflecting off the curves of the casket.

It felt like a betrayal somehow, like taking that first final step was acceptance of bitter reality. Ghost knew he was giving into that hollowed lie, but Johnny would want it like this. He had spoken of his mountains, his lochs, the beauty that hung around desolate hills hewn in purple. Johnny had dreamed a life for them there once upon a time; Ghost would do his best to make it true.

Ghost nods to the woman again. His throat was too torn up with jagged shards for him to speak words. The only sounds left to him today were animal ones.

She wheels the casket in, that rich brown gradually swallowed up by lifeless steel.

The door closes with a mechanical whine.

She looks to him again in question.

There's a shallow twitch of his head.

The woman presses the button. It starts.

Ghost watches.

+

[bisexual-horror-fan]

"How It's Always Been." Ethan Landry History.

Ay, ayyyy! So uh. I am just so, so into Ethan Landry it is fucking stupid. So much that I am posting this thing, a history mock up for Ethan of what I think life is like, this is angsty, family drama heavy, character deep, dive-y and includes some murder too! Enjoy it! I am gonna do some smut of him soon but for now, remember this is just my thoughts and headcanons and opinions, so enjoy this!

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Rating. Explicit. Length. 2.5K. NOT READER INSERT. This is just about Ethan baby. Warnings: SCREAM  6 SPOILERS. Family Drama. Angst. Neglect. Abuse. Coercion. Complex Emotions. Mixed Morality. Murder. Blood. Gore. Ethan Is A Fucked Up Guy. And I Love Him For It.

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Life for Ethan has never, ever been easy, or if it ever was, it was before he was truly cognizant and able to remember properly. Something always felt off but it took him a long time to be able to pin it down, and when he did it was like a glass shattering moment. The pane fractures and splits, breaking apart with knowledge that once received cannot be unlearned. Unfixable, even if you were to shift through the broken shards and painstakingly glue it back together your hands would be left torn and bleeding and the cracks would still show clear as day through the smudges of crimson fingerprints.

The biggest injustice in Ethan’s life was the worst one a person can suffer, the cruelty of total indifference. 

Have you ever experienced that? Being so totally and thoroughly ignored by everyone who is supposed to matter most? The people who share what is supposed to be a home with? Who birthed you into this world? Forced you the same way we all are into this shared experience we all call life, meant to play with the cards we are dealt. The middle of three and painfully ignored in all things in favour of his siblings. He can’t even be that mad at Quinn, to start anyway, it’s all about Richie, it’s always all about Richie.

He remembered the only good times and memories he had with his brother, when he wasn’t being a total fucking asshole, was when his needs and interests were being catered to and even then, not all the time. Filming his Stab tribute film was a complete mixed bag of some shockingly awesome moments mixed in with Richie having all the unwarranted, misplaced rage and self confidence found in a typical film bro who has watched one too many movies and swept one too many things Quinten Tarantino did under the rug. He was going on about how some aspects weren’t right, redoing takes over and over while waxing poetic about his fucking vision and berating his amateur friends and family who have never made a film or acted in any serious capacity before. 

Ethan used to love his brother, used to fucking look up to the guy but as he aged, rose tinted glasses gave way to show the truth of the kind of person Richie really was as well as the realization that he was the reason that their parents didn’t give a fuck about him. 

At first he tried not to blame him, Richie didn’t ask for all the attention but he sure as shit didn’t stop it either, and why would he when he is being so heavily catered to? His feelings about all of it were complex to say the least, going from real family caring about family, to disillusionment, to annoyance to anger, and eventually, outright hatred. He tried to get over it, tried to fix it and heal the hurt before it reached that level and the damage was permanent but Richie didn’t make it easy at all. From the lack of interest in Ethan’s life, hobbies, general well being, to the outright bullying he subjected him to at points. Richie is only a quarter of an inch taller than him but you’d think he was a full foot taller from how he acted so superior about the whole thing. 

Ethan felt bad for a moment when he found out about Richie dying, because a small, sick part of him was fucking happy. Experiencing joy thinking that now with Richie gone he was the only son, that meant something, now his dad would pay attention, now he would care-

Except that isn’t the case at all. Even in death it’s still all about Richie. 

At first it made sense, grief, mourning, sure, he was feeling it too to a degree, it was natural of course. 

But then Gale Weathers fucking book came out. 

Wayne is not the most reasonable man on the best of days, which a cop? Unstable? Unheard of. Then when the whole story came out and he read it, he was livid. Ethan swears some nights when he is lying awake he can still hear his father screaming, breaking things, tearing pages out of that damn book, yelling on and on about how it was- “Slander! That bitch can’t say these things about our boy! It isn’t true! He-he would never-”

Ethan isn’t exactly surprised. Richie was always really, really into not just the movies but the reality of it, the actual cases that book and film drew from. Wayne indulging in his habit by providing him with some ill gotten possessions of real life murder and crime scene evidence didn’t help either. 

At one point, when he was still trying to fix this, trying to salvage what was left of their relationship as family, he used one of his few talents and escapes to entertain his brother. He has a love for art, drawing, and has filled sketchbooks over the years with his sketches and musings. Mostly on the nights he would be re-watching a movie he had already seen, picked apart and analysed for the fifth time at least, something to help divide his attention and occupy his hands the night gaming didn’t seem appealing.  

He did a series of sketches in secret, he researched a lot to make them happen, and one night he showed Richie pencil outlines, red ink for blood, showing off various people from the cases, either dead or dying or whatever struck him as right. He thinks it might have been the time Richie was happiest with him,recalling the praise and excited ramblings, even if Richie didn’t know art, he gave it up for Ethan’s attention to detail and the visceral and violent nature he depicted in his work. 

“The black and white with only the blood being coloured?! It’s so, what’s the right word-Striking! It’s so striking.” 

Ethan tried to be happy too but it still felt hollow because it was all about what his brother wanted, when he tried to show him any non-Woodsboro or Stab related sketches he didn’t give them a second glance and certainly no compliment. Richie started making requests of even more intense extreme and grotesque nature, and then it became somewhat of an obligation as opposed to a project he was doing on his own time and for his own strange curiosity and enjoyment. Portraying these horrifying acts with starting realism was challenging and he had to admit that when he nailed the milky dead eyed look of a victim in a crime scene or the cross hatching was just perfect, he felt a sick and odd sense of…What was it? Pride? Amusement? Longing? It was a hard to define, outright miasma of emotions. 

The drawings get less and less as time wears on and his brother stops asking as much.

His dad is fucking insane, so is his sister, they say grief makes people do crazy things, but plotting to frame someone for murder to clear your son’s name is up there as probably one of the most extreme reactions one can have. He didn’t even really want to be a part of it but his dad and sister just immediately started talking as if he would be down, not considering his feelings or that he might not want this but that was how it was in his family.

No one ever thought of what Ethan wanted, they just assumed he’d go with the flow, the conversation “convincing him” was short, like they expected him to give way with a stiff breeze. So he had no choice, he lied, he said, of course he wanted to help, that he felt everything that they did but he didn’t. 

What he did feel was a misguided sense of hope, the idea that he might be able to have a real place in this family once everyone feels that they have avenged Richie. They can be a family again and now that he is the only son his dad will have to pay attention to him, and have to love him. 

Everything they suggested he went along with, all the convoluted and complicated details he was here for it and ready to do whatever they asked.

Wrapping his head around the act of it took some doing. Some late nights sat up wondering if he could really do that, could take someone's life, and after much internal fighting he decided it was worth it. What else did he have outside of his family? He invested so much time, so much effort, he couldn’t give up now, if this works then they can be happy and he can have everything he ever wanted, have them care about and for him. 

He wanted to show them as well as himself he could, if Richie could do it, so could he. 

It was around this time he showed his dad the sketches he showed Richie before. It did what he hoped, showed him he was serious about this, it curried some favour, he felt good, a sense of pride as his dad complimented his work. When the sketches were framed and included in the collection he actually cried that night, when alone, that sense of hope grew.

The plan formed quickly, Wayne and Quinn were obsessed and entirely consumed with it. He learned fast that anything he had to contribute would be heavily scrutinised and most likely rejected, he was just expected to fill the role they wanted of him.

As the plan grew it became painfully apparent that there was a lot expected of him, not only did he have to fit into the plan, play his part in the killings, he had to insert himself into the friend group, be there to help lead them where they needed to be and throw off suspicion and more. Quinn slotted herself in as Sam and Terra’s roommate and all the while had been frothing up a subreddit and online community dedicated to proving Richie as innocent and Sam as the true villain. He watched a few times and was present when Quinn would be going on her posting sprees, VPNs, fake IP’s and dummy accounts where tons upon tons of things were posted to push the narrative in the direction she wanted. It was honestly kind of scary, the dedication, the meanness she displayed. Ethan was glad he wasn’t on Quinn’s shit list, having her being not just pissed but willing and ready to dedicate large swaths of her life and time to tearing your life apart is terrifying. 

The lead up was a nerve wracking, what if he couldn’t worm his way in? What would he do then? It would cement him as a failure to his family. There was a lot of pressure to succeed but luckily, he and Chad got along really well. 

Or at least that is what Chad and the group thought which is what was really important. 

When it came down to it, after he was settled into the routine and knew the core group, it was time for the real plan to get going. The killings kicked off, he’d been amping himself up for it, trying to really get himself in the headspace to do it but something unexpected happened. Wearing the outfit and the mask, he chased down the victim that was supposed to be for practice, to make sure he could really do it when the time came, a totally nobody of a person, he managed to catch them with relative ease. 

The knife slid into that first victim and when he stabbed them, he felt alive, more alive than he ever had and also he felt seen. 

Even with the mask on, even though the person couldn’t see his face, their eyes were locked on him, centred in this moment, focused totally on him, the blade in his hand, driven into their stomach, it was shockingly intimate. A nervous lick of his lips behind the decaying mask, heavy breathing, his own chest heaving, an urge strikes, he follows the instinct he twists the knife. The body below him, because that is what it is, no longer a human, not a person with a life, thoughts, hopes or dreams, it is a body, one that is quickly dying, is going weak in the knees. 

Shakey blood stained hands clutching weakly at him, trying to push him away but he had stolen all the breath from their lungs when he forced his way inside, had affected them. He had changed them, is in the process of destroying them, altering them irrevocably, for the worse. He feels powerful for the first time maybe ever. He pulls the knife out and the soon to be corpse gasps, mouth open, blood on their teeth they whimper pathetically, he drives the knife forward again and it becomes a blur after that. Stab, rip, tear, in and out, back and forth warm sprays of blood and sounds of pain and anguish, wetness soaks through his glove and the robe and nothing has felt better. Being inside someone, turns out, no matter the context of the penetration, is a sensation he had been craving down to the marrow in his bones and now he was woken up to it. Knew what he had been missing. He craves it again, he wants more.

The strength it takes to accomplish the goal, to leave the body on the wet pavement, totally slack, eyes dead, skin turning cold, leaves him panting, sweaty and satisfied, staring down at the mess of red and spilled intestines. It didn’t feel like enough. Thankfully this is only the first time, the first of many, there will be plenty more opportunities to play, to have fun, to practise and get better, to forge new memories. 

Robe and mask in his bag, coat slipped on and zipped up to cover the blood that had soaked through the costume to his shirt, he leaves the body behind after dumping it into the dumpster. A trembling hand ran through heavy sweat soaked curls, he felt totally high on what he just did. 

No one expects him, no one is aware of the brutality he is capable of because of all the sheer frustration he has bubbling underneath the surface. He is going to show everyone that he has worth, he can do this. 

A chew of his bottom lip as he thinks and relives what he just experienced, vivid images and sound dancing through his mind as he is walking to the subway, thoughts of how this can give him everything he wanted. 

It’s all so clear, no one can ignore him with a seven inch steel blade buried in their body. If this is all it took to get a little attention and recognition, then he would have started doing it sooner. Richie was a self centred idiot, but he was right about this at the very least, killing has undeniable appeal that he intended to fully lose himself in, and finally things will change for him.

[goblininawig]

Death & Mischief, Part 2

This is one of two short pieces I wrote for Death Appreciation Week, hosted by @orionsangel86 , about two times that Death of the Endless and Loki of Asgard crossed paths.

Death and Mischief At the World's Fair

Once every hundred years, Death of the Endless becomes human. On this day in May 1893, she is Daisy Smith, a visitor to the World’s Columbian Exhibition, better known as the Chicago World's Fair. But she's not the only immortal being present that day.

~600 words | Rated T | a03 link

Includes spoilers for Loki, Season 2

Tags: Crossovers & Fandom Fusions, Episode: s02e03 1893 (Loki TV), Death Becomes Human for a Day, Historical References, Canon Compliant, Random Encounters, Short One Shot

Daisy chatted excitedly with her cousins, who flanked the smaller girl as they rode the Intramural Railway at the World’s Columbian Exhibition. Charlotte and Beatrice had not, until waking up that morning, had a cousin Daisy. Reality rearranged itself to allow Death of the Endless to become human for a day, once every hundred years. Today she was Daisy Smith, visiting her Chicago relatives so she might see the fair.

Her aunt and uncle sat behind them. It had already been an exciting day, and they were resting their feet as the sounds of brass bands wafted in from the surrounding park. Their little group disembarked at the next station and proceeded to the domed Palace of Fine Arts, where they wandered happily through the galleries, viewing art from masters all over the world.

After stopping for refreshments, they paid a visit to the Chinese Village. Daisy was staring at the red and gold replica of a Potala temple when her attention was drawn to a pair of white gentlemen who were softly arguing nearby.

“I told you: legwork. That requires walking…observing. This time and place is all we've got to go on. So we keep looking until we find a clue,” asserted the shorter man, who had gray hair and a thick mustache beneath his brown fedora.

The taller man, with had dark hair, a green silk tie, and a grumpy expression at odds with the other fair-goers, retorted, “Mobius, do you really think we’ll just stumble across Renslayer if we walk far enough? Because that’s not going to happen.”

“Daisy!” called her aunt, waving her to join them. “Come along, dear. We’re going inside.”

The curious little girl hurried after her relatives, leaving the mysterious men to their argument.

As night fell, all the park lights came on, the fairgrounds seemed even more impressive. Her aunt and uncle were ready to leave, but Daisy, supported by her cousins, begged to ride enormous Ferris Wheel first. The adults capitulated, and they joined the queue.

When they were on board, Daisy pressed close to the wall of the enormous glass carriage, it turned and rose enough for the next carriage to fill with passengers. Finally, their carriage was at the apex of the enormous wheel, and the gleaming lights of the "White City" twinkled down below her.

“Can you believe this is real?” she asked her cousins. “It’s like being in a fairy tale.”

Their carriage turned around the wheel, suddenly showing Daisy a veiw of the two men she’d heard arguing near the temple. They were in the next car with a mustachioed, bespectacled Black gentleman with them. Most shockingly, a white woman in a strange costume was attacking them. Daisy and the other passengers facing the nearby car all gasped and exclaimed over the exchange. Bursts of green light, like some sort of magic trick, kept appearing and disappearing.

“Is it a show?” Charlotte asked.

“I don’t think so,” Daisy replied. “They seem in earnest.”

The commotion ended as quickly as it had begun. No one could understand what had happened. Shortly afterwards, the ride ended. Daisy and her relatives disembarked.

They were heading to the nearest exit when the Ghost Clock, of which they’d heard rumors - appeared suddenly, huge and unbelievable, over the Midway.

“Girls, hurry!” shouted Daisy’s uncle, putting his arms around them and rushing them to safety. Daisy screamed and ran with the other girls. They quickly put the apparition out of sight.

“Well, I shall never forget this night, not in a hundred years!” declared Daisy’s aunt that evening as she tucked the girls into bed. “You’ll certainly have a lot to tell your family when you go home again.”

“I certainly shall,” Daisy replied with a strange, knowing smile.

[godhoodandgirlhood]

RIDE THE CYCLONE HCs!!!!

WARNING 4 SPOILERS AND ONLY ONE JANE/ PENNY HC (im so sorry)

noel is a chronic nail chewer

ik we all headcanon that ocean is literally suffering from every painful experience possible, but i would also like to add iron deficiency to that list

mischa is actually so good at cooking so whenever the choir is hungry, he and constance always have to make the meals since everyone else is physically incapable of doing so. 

out of the group, ocean and noel have the best grades and (surprisingly) constance has the worst. she doesn’t really care about school because she knows she’ll just take over the cafe anyways.

noel is an absolute genius when it comes to language arts and ocean hates him so much for it 

ricky loves tim hortons so much he always orders a hazelnut ice capp and a cheese tea biscuit

noel secretly loves tim’s too and orders a mango creamy chill and a garden salad with ricky

mischa is addicted to monster energy and everyone thinks it’s concerning

shockingly, ocean or mischa don’t get road rage. it’s constance and no one knows why she’s so angry when she drives

noel’s second favourite movie is the perks of being a wallflower and he is a charlie kinnie (only lowkey tho)

mischa came to uranium city when they were in grade 9, but didn’t “join” (get manhandled) into the choir until the end of the grade

ocean can only chew sugar free gum or else it feels like her teeth will fall out

ricky has all the dvd’s of like star wars and invader zim and stuff like that

mischa thinks it’s so cool and starts collecting video game cd’s

noel had this notebook with all his angsty poetry and once, mischa took it and started reading it out loud to embarrass him until he realized how personal they are

he profusely apologized afterwards

constance literally has the loudest sneeze on planet earth. when she sneezes the earth shakes a little (/j)

ocean hates the sound of knuckle cracking and noel does it all the time to piss her off

noel is emo at heart he has all the my chemical romance albums

ricky does everything “for the aesthetic” (don’t ask what this means idk either)

noel eats lemons and mischa thinks it’s so gross

mischa eats orange skins and noel thinks it’s so gross

aka the olive theory

rip noel you would’ve loved tiktok

rip constance you would’ve loved bereal 

rip ocean you would’ve loved twitter

rip mischa you would’ve loved discord

rip ricky you would’ve loved splatoon 3

penny (omg finally a penny hc!!!) was oceans gay awakening

constance was pennys gay awakening

ocean was constance and noel’s gay awakening (noel is a shady bitch i love him)

noel has celiacs 

mischa started to read poetry because he knew noel was a poet and wanted to impress him

[arcanusarchieves-if]

If it hasn't been asked before, how does the ROs feel about MCs condition? And the ones that don't know about it initially, will they treat mc differently when they find out? I'm aware this might probably be spoilers but couldn't help but ask considering the previous ask👀

Right off the bat I’ll say that any character (not just the ROs) who find out about MC’s condition during the course of the game will start to treat them differently. I won’t go into the exact details because spoilers but I will tell you how they feel about the condition in general.

Astoria (like all of them) has pretty complicated feelings towards people with Interius. She doesn’t hate them or feel disgusted by them and is actually pretty involved in the activism surrounding their rights!

But…

She can just be a bit…dismissive. She unintentionally speaks for them instead of supporting their voices and has a bit of a toxic positivity mindset - very “things will get better!” instead of acknowledging how bad things have been. She’ll get better about it as time goes on but she’ll definitely need to improve her methods a bit - even if her intentions are good.

I’ll just say it flat out - Caspian handles it the best. He has had nearly two decades of “experience” on how to handle supporting MC and other people who suffer from Interius.

He’s obviously very supportive of people with the condition and is (shockingly) pretty involved in activist circles surrounding the topic - but when it comes to how he handles/talks about the condition itself on a more personal level, he tends to take notes from MC.

Like if they’re joking about it, then he might joke about it or if they’re silent on the matter, he won’t bring it up, and I imagine you get the point. Overall, he tends to let people define how they feel about the condition and works from there.

Solaine handles it the worst. There’s really no way around it. A big part of their story and route is going to be them getting over their discrimination towards people with MC’s condition.

That being said, their hatred towards people with Interius comes less from a place of genuine disgust and more from a place insecurity. Like, Solaine knows that they are heavily disliked, but they also know that the majority of Magus dislike people with Interius more so their mindset towards them has become “I’m terrible but not as terrible as them…” in a sense.

That being said, there is some level of genuine disgust there. I won’t try to hide that. As intelligent as Solaine is, they’re not completely immune to the opinions of the people around them or making decisions based on feeling instead of fact.

So yeah. They’re a bigoted asshole but they’ll get over it.

Maeve handles it…decently? She doesn’t exactly hate people with Interius but she is a bit uncomfortable around them at first because of the stuff she’s heard about people with the condition.

She doesn’t necessarily see people with Interius as being bad or dangerous (which doesn’t seem like much but is a huge step forward compared to most Magus) but she understands the dangers of the condition itself which leaves her a bit torn at first. Once she gets a better understanding of everything though, she is incredibly accepting!

Jasper…doesn’t really acknowledge it? I think that initially he just doesn’t know how he’s supposed to handle it. He doesn’t hate/look down on people with Interius but is aware that other people do so he kind of just keeps quiet so that he doesn’t step on any toes.

It isn’t the best way to handle it - and he knows it’s wrong not to stick up for what’s right - but he just finds it difficult to speak up against it considering how prevalent the discrimination is. It’s definitely something he will be working on throughout the story though - and once he gets past his initial fears, he’d also be pretty involved in activist circles.

[variousqueerthings]

partner and I watched the david tennant around the world in 80 days:

somewhat uneven opening act, was quite a bit of emotional stuff with passeportout that wasn't introduced aaaall that well and never really gets paid off either, and could have been better with a few tweaks

however each episode then got progressively better than the last

and was really into its final thesis, which was shockingly not about romantic love, even though there was a whole big setup around it, really appreciated that (I mean, sort of about romantic love, but not romantic love as the way to fix your life/the idea that you can just sort out things by being in love -- more about letting romantic love go actually)

literally a qpp type triad between fogg, passepartout, and fix??? you're waiting for the narrative to do the inevitably split in which fix and passepartout have their romance and then there's fogg's story next to it, but that... just doesn't really happen? and fogg explicitly compares his former great romantic love to the relationship he's built with the two of them???

whole episode dedicated to honouring bass reeves, former slave turned us marshal, on whom the western genre is basically based, and I'd say it's my favourite of the episodes overall

whole episode dedicated to honouring jane digby, english former aristocrat who scandalised everyone by having a ton of lovers and eventually marrying sexy younger sheikh medjuel el mezrab in damascus

really enjoyed the fact that it was an international collaboration, and you could tell. lot of fantastic actors from all over the world, lot of joy and respect given to their presence and said world

struggled a tad with being quite as open about the truth of english colonialism as I would have wanted personally, but it does speak to it, and it is a continued thread -- could have done more, glad it did some

there's an infuriating thread of how passepartout gets treated as a black working class man, but it's intentional, if not quite as acknowledged to his face as I wished (but then there's a thing that happens at the end which speaks to a delicious reversal of roles so all is forgiven -- well passepartout forgives them way earlier on, but me on his behalf)

abigail fix is a very well-written character. she gets to be good at the things she's good at, while also containing both the ability to be angry at the limitations pushed onto her, and have her own biases as a white upperclass british woman

all in all, it's got stuff that's wobbly for sure, but a lot of things that are annoying are also intentionally so (the fact, for example, that both fogg and fix don't initially take in passepartout's perspective and move through life with that blessed british "I can do what I want" colonialist attitude)

once the puzzle is complete it's so very very satisfying to have watched

loved the final scene with all my aroace qpp-having heart

david tennant spends so much of it being just the most miserable drippy former public school boy, he's drooping, he's sad, he's hurt and...

so spoiler for one scene here but:

he gets his shirt stripped off him and flogged which was also Pretty Neat.

[siriannatan]

Ghost of Tumble Town - one shot

Yeah... @doodleshrimps' Bandit AU inspired me to write something about this idea of mine.

Warning, it is a bit sad at the start.

AO3 link for anyone who prefers to read there.

Canon differences (might contain spoilers):

warden wasn't brought to Tumble Town by fWhip,

it killed Jimmy, respawn is not a thing in this au, not for most. Joel and Scott can respawn but that's a god/fae thing and Scott's keeping it a secret,

totems are a thing and can stop you from dying. Very valuable and rare,

Norman and Flick returned as ghosts with Jimmy and the rest of the citizens.

Jimmy missed the hermits' 'visit' while dead/ getting used to being a ghost, not wanting to freak them out.

Scott didn't care how many jabs Joel tossed at him for still visiting Tumble Town even after Jimmy was gone. It wasn't like the 'god' knew Scott was a fae and how distant and foreign concept death was to him. Fae are immortal. He would never die. As long as he had access to magic it is… But that wasn't really death. Not how mortals understood it. A fae without magic just fades away until there are just faint memories of them left. Why Scott was so careful with keeping his real identity a secret? Being known as a weirdo with llamas was better than being known as a powerful fae. Especially with a witch around. As un-witchy as Shubble was it was better to be safe than risk his wings. 

Jimmy, the sheriff was probably the only one who figured him out. Shockingly, considering how dense he was. And didn't treat him any differently. Mostly. He did keep iron away from places Scott would visit in town. Would put his badge away when Scott was around. He did not mind how particular Scott was about specific order of things, and names, and greetings and… and all the fae stuff. Even if Scot never showed him his wings.

Which is probably why he never hid them when visiting Jimmy's grave. It was nothing special. just a mound of mesa sand with a crude cross marking the stop. No one wanted to stick around after the Warden just out of nowhere, seemingly, showed up and wrecked the town. Killing all the citizens and the sheriff. Vanishing without a trace soon after. Only then did the other emperors dare to come and check for survivors. There were none. Not even Jimmy's cats…

It was nearly two months ago. Before the rift business happened. And yet, despite never caring much for mortal races, humans even less than others, Scott found himself coming back again and again. To leave fresh flowers and take away the dry, ruined by howling wind old flowers from the last visit. And quietly tell the silent grave what has happened in the past week. Followed by sitting quietly until the silence and lack of colour drove him almost insane. 

Just to repeat it next week.

And so, Scott sat, his wings covering the grave in pretty colours with the light of the setting sun. Thinking it's about time to go back to Chromia. Not that they couldn't survive one night without him. Owen shouldn't be too much of an issue for some time…

"You brought poppies today…"

A sudden, familiar but impossible voice had Scott jolting to his feet and looking around. No one was on the ground so he looked at the full of holes ruin of Jimmy's house. There, on the roof, sat Jimmy. Looking almost as he did the day he died. But not quite. There was something off. Something unnerving but Scott ignored it. Too happy to see him.

"Jimmy? But you…" if he wasn't a fae and didn't have complete control of his emotions he'd probably crumble down crying. "You said they're your favourites once…"

Jimmy shrugged and jumped down. There was no sound as he landed, and Scott could swear he saw him sink into the ground a little bit. "I got better, I think…" he hummed. There was this weirdly distant quality in his voice. Like he was both here and somewhere else. "You weren't kidding, your wings are really pretty," Jimmy hummed going to touch Scott's wing but… his hand passed right through the fae. "Yeah… still figuring that out…" the sheriff chuckled taking a step back.

Scott didn't need to be told what 'that' was. What Jimmy was now. He did die. And now was back, as a ghost. And not just some ghost. As the blonde idly floated a few inches off the ground, likely forgetting to keep himself on the ground, Scott could see the magic radiating off of him. Cold and dry, neither good nor bad. Death didn't take sides. It just took people away. The good, the bad and all in between. "It's okay. I was a bit lost and overwhelmed when I left fae realms," Scott shook his head, smiling a bit. He was just happy to talk to Jimmy again. "It's good to see you again," he said reaching out to at least try to touch Jimmy's face. 

It worked and he could feel Jimmy's face. It was like cold wax. Not budging in the slightest under his touch. Scott met a few ghosts before settling where Chromia is now but Jimmy was different. Slightly translucent but not at all see-through. And much more present. Most of the other ghosts Scott knew would already forget who he was and move on to different things. Not Jimmy. He was staring at Scott even if his glassy, dead eyes occasionally glanced at the simple grave.

"Must have been a chock with how much you like colours…" Jimmy hummed tearing his eyes off the grave.

"Eh, winter fae's lands are always covered in snow, all in shades of white and grey with some green at best," Scott shrugged making a bit of snow whirling in one hand. "How are you feeling?" he asked letting it disperse. "We saw the aftermath… it was even worse than now…"

Jimmy shrugged, forcing himself to the ground. "I saw it, I think… the just after is a bit fuzzy, I was being pulled away but… something kept me here… It felt like the after is not meant to me for some reason…" he hummed walking out into the ruined town. Slowly more and more ghosts appeared, greeting their sheriff as if they were not all dead. "Like this was the end and there was nothing more…" he carried on talking as Scott silently followed. Watching the ghosts clean up the rubble.

The biggest shock was when two cats ran out of the sheriff's home, through a solid wall, and meowed, in that distant ghostly undertone. Rubbing against Scott's legs. They always liked him. Part of being a fae is being loved by all animals. Alive or dead, it turns out.

"Should I tell others you're…back or give you some more time to settle back into things?" he asked glancing at the sun. It was getting really low. Maybe he could stay the night now that the sheriff was back in town?

"Maybe wait a few days? Until this place isn't as much of a mess?" Jimmy grimaced stopping in front of the bank. It was pretty ruined, but, shockingly, nothing that was inside when the Warden attacked was missing. Scott heard some of the other emperors whisper about the place being cursed. "You can stay the night… if you don't mind all the ghosts…" Jimmy offered saving Scott asking.

"I don't mind," Scott grinned. "It's still the same Tumble Town, and it's not like I can die anyway," he shrugged as a dead bird flopped right next to him.

They were silent for a second, staring as the ghost of the bird left the body and dodged the ghostly cats that wasted no time pouncing at it. And laughed as it flew to a tree. They probably should have been worried about it but at the moment watching Norman and Flick chase it was funny. And fae had a rather unique sense of humour anyway and found dead birds very amusing even when they didn't leave ghosts behind.

[upwards-descent]

I started writing a self-insert OC Venture Bros fic but idk if I'll finish it, however what I've got is too good not to share (spoilers for season 6 & 7)

"This... Is our new target. Or, I guess more like this is Venture's newest Guild mandated arch."

Henchman 21 leaned over the dining room table, shuffling the stack of papers around so he could read them better.

"Doctor Bedlam?" 21 hissed through his teeth, a sympathetic twist in his furrowed brows. "He's like. Y'know."

"What? Like what?" The Monarch demanded. He had one fist propped up on his cocked hip, the other spread flat across the table. It was still a bit funny to see him in both his cowl and a silk robe. "You chickening out on me now, huh?"

"No, no, no, no," 21 shook his head emphatically. "I just think we should exercise some uh... Extra level of caution."

"Is there something I'm missing here?" The Monarch held up their target's picture. "Are you really that afraid of this fucking... Tony Stark/Slumdog Millionaire lookin' motherfucker?"

"The only reason why Doctor Bedlam isn't a 10 is he doesn't actively kill," 21 crossed his arms, one brow quirked. "Imagine a beast like Red Death but sub the bloodlust for, like, literal clinical psychopathy. You wanna act casual about that?"

"Really?" The Monarch looked at the picture again, pursing his lips in thought. "This guy? He looks like one of those cringey pick-up artists but he only goes after yacht club college girls."

Henchman 21 simply shrugged.

"I'm only speakin' the facts, boss. Don't underestimate this guy."

"Feh," The Monarch flapped his hand and let the sheet of paper flutter back down onto the table, already distracted by an exploration of the fridge. "Nothing the mighty Blue Morpho and his trusty Kano can't handle. We'll suit up after breakfast."

🦋🦋🦋

The Monarch-- or rather, Blue Morpho whistled in appreciation once he and 'Kano' were dropped off by taxi at their location. 

"Damn, nice digs," The Monarch mumbled. "What floor is this guy on again?"

"Penthouse suite," Henchman 21 double-checked his notes before folding up the paper into a tiny square and tucking it in his pocket. "Top floor, baby. This guy's an arms dealer, he's like rich rich."

"Like Batman rich or like...?"

"I've heard rumors he's like Oprah rich."

"Daaamn."

Shockingly, the duo got into the building with no issue. Strange. The security seemed non-existent, the only visible employee being some older guy snoring at the front desk. They slipped into the elevator but when The Monarch reached for the penthouse button, 21 superceded him, obscuring it with a cupped palm.

"We'll take the floor below then climb the stairs to the roof," He encouraged, thumbing the 29th floor instead. "Who knows what kinda shit he's got waiting for us at the door."

"I still think you're overreacting," The Monarch rolled his eyes but didn't fight back, leaning against the wall as the elevator ascended. "Why the hell would the Guild assign such a supposed level 11 badass to a shmuck like Venture?"

"No clue," 21 frowned for a moment. "It's not like Dr. Venture goes out and does superhero work, he's kind of a shut-in."

"Yeah," The Monarch snickered. "He doesn't save cats in trees or kiss babies or whatever. Sometimes he's almost as much a villain as I am. Did you know he powered one of his inventions with a fucking dead orphan kid once?"

"Fucked up but also hardcore."

The elevator dinged and the doors slid open. Just across the hall was the emergency exit and, once again, the pair slipped out and up with no issues whatsoever. After a brief climb, they were on the roof and overlooking the rest of New York City from a bird's eye view.

"Alright, here's a vent we can enter through," 21 grunted with effort as one of his knives popped open the grate. "This should hopefully take us to the living room but we'll take it nice and slow."

"Move over," The Monarch barked, easily tucking both long legs into the vent, using a swift rush of momentum to zoom in like a slide. "And have more confidence in your leader!"

Crawling on hands and knees, they managed to move rather quietly, pausing over every subsequent grate to peek down and do some reconnaissance. There were exits into a master bathroom, the living room, the kitchen, and what looked like a study. It was too dark to tell but that seemed advantageous so 21 silently lifted the grate and the pair soundlessly hit the floor on two feet.

[andoqin]

List of dramas that I am watching or want to watch, just for personal record reasons:

Cdramas:

The ingenious one (36/36): this drama has blown me away so far with its incredibly nuanced and sharp writing, its love stories between all the major couples and the absolutely magnificent cinematography. FINISHED verdict: HIGHLIGHT drama of the year for me so far. Smart, engaging, complicated, peak romance of all sorts, just what the doctor ordered tbh (overly long review can be found in my tags). 9.5

Chang Feng Du (40/40): I did not realise how close to the end I was. This drama is very pleasant and I adore our mains, but sadly except for a few highlights (the early beating gjs put on himself, the destruction of the gu family and the aftermath, the battle for wangdu) the writing hasn’t been able to keep the narrative tension up which is sad. FINSHED verdict: Very pretty and engaging in the beginning kinda loses me in the second half and then fizzles out emotionally, doesn't crash and burn but doesn't exactly stick the landing either 6.5

Gone with the rain (10/30): adore the gremlin4gremlin couple and from the spoilers I’ve seen not gonna adore much else

An ancient love song (1/16): incredible first episode and with only 30 min per ep and 16 eps in total this is gonna be a short fun ride I hope ( with lots of angst and tears naturally).

Here we meet again (18/32): started this for Wu Qian playing to type and Zhang BinBin being pretty but oh boy I’m struggling I just don’t care about the conflicts and in s surprising twist, I like the flashbacks to high school much much more, which is very funny if you think about the fact that the reason I started liking wu qian in the first place was because of her show stealing performance in the flashbacks of My Sunshine. I’ve been promised kisses in the near future so I’m gonna hold out till then but this might end up another drop.

Hidden Love (5/25): this one promises to be v sweet and kinda short but oh my god I have so many dramas on my plate rn so this might end up the first drop.

Till the end of the moon (22/40): I think I watched ep 1 when it started but then I got busy and now I am just staring at gifsets and crying, it’s definitely on the list to watch tho.

Heroes (6?/38): I started this a while ago, was really into it and then got busy… dammit. I might just rewatch the beginning so I can remember most of the set up for sure but man the visuals on this were so good, aaaa liu yuning.

Blood of youth (0/40): the last 12 months really have spoiled us with interesting looking wuxia dramas and this one is definitely on the list, I have been gifbaited once again.

Ray of light (0/30): usually hs dramas are something I avoid, but because I will not be watching the longest promise, for reasons, and bc @storge is a gifmaking temptress, this has made it on the list.

The legend of anle (0/39): Lmao trust YOUKU to screw up the release with bad subs only 1 ep even for vips and no released schedule… but at least I can put this on the backburner for now. Lmao should have known not to trust a youku dilreba drama, the tl has soundingly spoken and I'm gonna avoid this.

Ancient Detective (0/24): I was recced this by a friend when I mentioned my love for wuxia dramas, and since it’s almost shockingly short for a cdrama it’s on the list. EDIT: this got @purplehanfus seal of approval so it is def going up the list and since it's complete I'll probably at least watch it before the ongoing ones.

Butterflied love (0/22): see I barely made this post and already forgot about the screencap that got me started on writing it, the screencapa look great, but the drama is on mango, so who knows when I’ll truly be able to watch this

When I fly towards you (0/24): Well, I wasn't interested bc modern youth drama, but then I heard it described as "updated It Started with a Kiss" and... I'm weak? ISWAK was pretty much my crack gateway into asian dramas and while IDK if i could rewatch it today, something in me will always love this kind of story. Maybe it's like a quick palate cleanser in between since apparently eps are only about 30 mins.

Mysterious Lotus Casebook(0/40): CHENG YIIIII, in a possibly bromantic role? Or maybe het romance, I'll take it all. Plus I've already seen he's bleeding copious amounts as per his contract, so that's most of the checklist done.

Lost You Forever (0/??): because nature abhors a vacuum I apparently must have?? A minimum to watch pile and this actually and genuinely looks good??? A Yang Zi drama in 2023??? The mind boggles. Anyway I've been reading the recaps with delight, and am def going to watch this when part two airs in a couple of months but until then I have a thankful reprieve...

Kdramas:

See you in my 19th life (4/12): since kdramas release so slowly this is on the backburner but it does have some great gifsets that keep enticing meee

King the land (2/16): I am watching this for junho but it is kinda hard bc I have so much else on my plate and while I don’t mind a classic romcom type story I feel I need a bit more of an emotional hook

Story of the nine-tailed 1938 (0/16): so so many gorgeous and hilarious gifsets so little time. I loved season one so so much and the fact that this focuses on the brotherly relationship?? Extremely smart writing decisions were made!

The red sleeve (0/16): I blame @dangermousie for this she keeps reblogging angsts junho on my dash and I am but god’s weakest warrior.

Love tractor (0/8): gay himbo farmboy falls in love?? You bet this is on the list

Lady durian (0/?): ok this is only on the list for crack reasons but, daughter in law is in love with mother in law and both women are like 40+ truly kdramas have entered a new era and I kinda wanna be here for that

EDIT: Revenant (0/12): Kim Tae Ri in a spooky drama? POSSIBLY POSSESSED KIM TAE RI??? how could i forget to put her on this list, plus it was written by the Kingdom writer and I adore that drama plus it's only 12 eps which is smart in this case so... let's hope i get to it at some point D:

My dearest (2/20): I checked this out because it's got pretty much everything going for it from a production standpoint and boy did the first two eps deliver. This has got 2 seasons though so I'll probably wait until the second season is airing, since it won't be too long till season 2 or so the internet tells me.

My lovely liar (0/16): minhyun learned to act and I wanna see it happen!!

Jdramas:

Our dining table (2/10): ok this category is gonna be a bit shorter bc I haven’t watched too much drama recently but omg the gifs for this I am just crying thinking about it they look so cute??

Jack o‘frost (0/6): people have recced it and it’s short so here it is.

Utsukushii kare s2 (0/4): Season 1 was an unexpected delight so I hope s2 works just as well.

She loves to cook and she loves to eat (0/10): the manga for this is amazing (and hungry making) so I hope this adaptation holds up.

Ok this list is in no way exhaustive (well except for me being exhausted just trying toward this down) and probably subject to change ( I haven’t even looked at thaidramas or twdramas I gotta stop for now) but hopefully this will keep me on the ball and maybe I can add to it whenever a new tempting gifset crosses my dash…