#sorry about all the links i cannot just have 1 answer

[alonetimelover]

pairing: (ex)Harry Styles x Ginger Spice's daughter!reader x Max Verstappen

fc: Sabrina Carpenter

summary: They broke up and she decided to disappear and write a heartbreaking song. Through this process her old friends from F1 were with her. With one two-time World Champion getting closer and closer.

warnings: swearing, cheating, Harry is an asshole in this (sorry!)

a/n: Long? Oh yes. It's a long one. But also my first F1 related fic, hope you enjoy!

masterlist

——————————————————————————————

——————————————————————————————

——————————————————————————————

——————————————————————————————

f1 and redbullracing

liked by yourinstagram, landonorris, maxverstappen1 and 349 392 others

f1 Is there a better way to start 2023 season than with YN YSN (sweetly called the tiny boss of Red Bull Racing) in the paddock? We say there is NOT! Welcome YN, we hope you have the best time with us!

view all 19 323 comments

yourinstagram thank uuuuu!

danielricciardo THE boss is here!

landonorris *heart eyes*

charles_leclerc Welcome back, YN!

ynupdates oh how i missed her face

ynsmybestie 5 months without even a photo of her finger online... it was a draught

ynsmymama yn's a vroom vroom girlie?????

ynsmybabie F1? is she a fan? tiny boss? what is going on?

⤷ ynupdates I feel like I'm the only one that knew. YN is Christian Horner's (red bull racing boss) step-daughter.

⤷ ynsmybestie isn't his wife ginger spice?

⤷ ynupdates yes! she's YN's mum. how do you guys not know that?

⤷ ynshands maybe because she's using her grandma's surname and not her mother's?

formulafan49 so we're getting las vegas content in bahrain? this sport is getting out of control with all those celebrities attending

⤷ landonorizz why are you being bothered by somebody that knows almost everything about formula 1? go be mad somewhere else

——————————————————————————————

yourinstagram

liked by danielricciardo, landonorris, maxverstappen1 and 2 201 302 others

yourinstagram hiii💛 took a break and wrote a song. you're losing me is out now! i love all of you my pathological people pleasers.

view all 91 393 comments

danielricciardo be a happy song with me?

⤷ yourinstagram running to you right now

⤷ landonorris bringing mum's biscuits

⤷ maxverstappen1 I'll bring myself 😊

⤷ danielricciardo you lot weren't invited, but come in... I guess

landonorris you're the only person I'm not mad at for making me cry, ynn

⤷ yourinstagram you've heard the song before, lan

⤷ landonorris shhhh

⤷ danielricciardo it won't make her fall in love with you, norris

⤷ landonorris fuck you man

maxverstappen1 💛💛

ynupdates WHAT IN THE HELL HAPPENED HERE

ynsmybestie I won't recover. I fucking won't recover

ynsmymama I'm gonna die... its so sad. its heartbreaking. I'm losing myself

hArrysbtch woah, my heart cannot take this

harrysmoustache firstly, break my heart and take it, yn

harrysmoustache secondly, why is the whole f1 here? wtf

——————————————————————————————

——————————————————————————————

——————————————————————————————

harryupdates

liked by hArrysbtch, harrysmoustache and 45 202 others

harryupdates In his latest interview Harry was asked about his private life - especially his relationship with YN. After the question of "do you feel like you throw a great love away?" Harry answered with "I don't know. I don't regret a lot of things in my life but that's [the relationship] probably one of them." You can read the interview via the link in our story!

view all 4 201 comments

hArrysbtch suddenly a six year lasting relationship was a mistake???

hArrysbtch ehh, harry. i kinda feel that the breakup (from Harry's side) happened a long time ago. there is no sparkle anymore

hArrysbtch now let me start on not mentioning her name like EVER "my last partner" her name is YN, why he can't just say it? it's been going on for years. since they started dating really...

harrysmoustache that wasn't the best interview

ynsmymama about 'you're losing me': "every artist has their imagination that they write down and then release. sometimes it's good and sometimes it should be kept private. i'm not the one to size it up." THAT WAS FUCKING LOW

⤷ harrysmoustache as much as I love him that was petty af

⤷ hArrysbtch especially when almost all critics named this song one of the best LYRICALLY and MUSICALLY in the last few decades

ynshands "I don't know if you can be ready to move on from a longterm relationship. it's definitely harder than from something that lasts months or two years." THIS MOTHERF****R IS TALKING ABOUT NOT BEING THE ONE TO MOVE ON BUT HE DID WHILE STILL BEING IN A RELATIONSHIP??????

⤷ ynsmymama this is called audacity

⤷ harrysfan49 cheating was never confirmed, was it?

⤷ ynsmybestie yes, it was. right after harry's "announcement" yn posted a story with lyrics from 'illicit affairs'. i think that's enough of a confirmation.

ynsmybestie yeah, here he comes again not being able to fucking say her name. those 6 years meant nothing?

⤷ harrysfan92 maybe he doesn't want to share his private relationship online

⤷ ynsmybestie i don't understand that. you're loving a person for six years, claiming them the love of your life, but saying the name is hard? he never mentioned her in interviews (my closest friend, my partner, someone I love). he couldn even show up at her birthday party because he had a photoshoot. just to point out, the drivers showed up in London, even though they had a race in Imola the next day.

⤷ harrysfan87 you guys are toxic. just gonna blame him for the breakup? unbelievable.

——————————————————————————————

ynupdates

liked by ynsmybestie, landofan92 and 88 203 others

ynupdates YN AND LANDO AT THE NIGHTCLUB IN MONACO!!!!!

view all 6 001 comments

ynsmybestie NO FUCKING WAY

ynsmybestie SHE LOOKS SO HOT

ynsmymama the way he looks at her ??? 🫠

ynsfan92 find somebody who looks at you just like lando looks at yn. YOU CAN'T

⤷ ynsmymuse have you seen how max looks at her?

landofan92 do I need to change my bio from norizz to yesrizz?

user39 yeah, moving on quickly when her exboyfriend is talking about how he adores her

⤷ ynsmybestie where??? because i only saw how awful he was to YN from the moment they broke up

user02 yeah, move on quickly and go trough all the drivers

——————————————————————————————

yourinstagram added to her IG story!

——————————————————————————————

——————————————————————————————

——————————————————————————————

lando.jpg

liked by yourinstagram, maxverstappen1 and 1 004 392 others

lando.jpg yn showed her favourites

view all 203 494 comments

danielricciardo LIAAAAAR. SHE LOVES ME MORE.

⤷ yourinstagram of course

⤷ lando.jpg i love your sarcasm

maxverstappen1 💛

yourinstagram not my fault you were the only ones available for photos

⤷ maxverstappen1 I don't mind

⤷ lando.jpg neither do I

⤷ danielricciardo I DO

⤷ charles_leclerc I DO TOO

ynsmybestie hot

ynsmybestie but also i see you YN with favouring Max and Lando, i see you girl

ynsmymama why I've never realised how hot those two are???

ynshands is there a thing she does badly?

——————————————————————————————

ynupdates

liked by ynsmybestie, maxandyn and 68 574 others

ynupdates YN and MAX VERSTAPPEN at the bar tonight in Zandvoort, celebrating Max's win!

view all 4 206 comments

ynsmybestie SEE? you defend the girl, you get the girl!

ynsmymama i mean i was rooting for them but i am still speechless

ynshands YAS PARENTS

maxfan85 after the race that he had, tying to yet another record and getting a girl? is there a thing he can't do or can't have??

ynsfan93 sooo, do we say they're together orrr?

⤷ ynsmybestie i mean, look at them. i have many friends but i'm not that cozy with any of them

⤷ ynsmymama i vote early stages of dating. yn's a touchy person in nature so you know, it can be that

——————————————————————————————

——————————————————————————————

yourinstagram added to her IG story!

——————————————————————————————

a/n: do you want to see more of them?

——————————————————————————————

part 2

[ooctlt]

I think the etiquette of ask blogs is a forgotten art. what I'm saying is (imo) it's not that people don't want to play, it is they don't know HOW, and more importantly they don't understand that the game exists to begin with. obviously you do not have to teach people the rules because your time and energy is finite but idk. it feels like from some of your OOC responses that you assume people know the rules and are playing badly, but I genuinely think people (me) just don't know what you are wanting them (us) to do. and also they (i) don't know how to tell if they (i) are playing the game correctly.

An example I am genuinely confused about is, is inciting a "shut up" answer a signal that the game is being played correctly, because we are inciting a reaction from the character? or is a "shut up" answer a signal that we are playing wrong and need to do something different? I'm sorry. I really love your art and seeing the story unfold but I'm confused and I want to play and I don't understand how.

yeah ive had a couple people tell me this has been the first active askblog in a while and the concept of askblog etiquette has been forgotten- @thatneoncrisis and i made a diagram:

link to full-res image

a "shut up" reaction will hopefully show whether or not it's a closed path of exploration: if you have gideon sweating, going "pshhh its nothinggg" it means there is something worth exploring. if you have harrow slamming the door in your face, that is an advance that wont work on her

transcript under the readmore:

DEAD END QUESTION ANON: CAMILLA DO YOU THINK HARROW'S HOT?

"Please stop talking to me."

This question is BAD because it's BLUNT, INCREDIBLY PERSONAL and founded on INCOMPLETE KNOWLEDGE of their relationship.

NOTE that its not that shitty questions will NEVER be answered, its that 1) they have a LOWER chance of being answered and 2) they have a HIGHER chance of being made fun of in character

gideon: haha who thinks harrow is HOT

DECENT INCONSEQUENTIAL QUESTION ANON: CAMILLA DO YOU LIKE TO DO ANYTHING FUN WITH HARROW?

"Sure. We run a lot of errands together."

This kind of question may not advance the plot, as it is INCREDIBLY BROAD yet NONINVASIVE. They're good for quick 1-3 panel answers. May generally be met with a less EXCITING answer.

It might also be DIFFICULT TO ANSWER because a broad question could include MULTIPLE ANSWERS - asking "do you guys go out" could not be answered SUSTAINABLY, because i cannot draw all the places they visit

ANON: EVERYONE, WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE CLOUD / WATER / MOLECULAR STRUCTURE / BONE / CAR / COFFEE BRAND/ BOOK CHARACTER?

me: "i have to do so much research"

NEAT QUESTION CAMILLA HAS HARROW EVER ASKED YOU TO DO SOMETHING WITH HER SHE WAS EXCITED ABOUT?

"Yes, actually. She once invited me to [REDACTED], I didn't know she liked that sort of thing."

This question is SICK AS FUCK because not only do you learn something SUBSTANTIAL about the characters, you have stumbled upon A NEW PLOT BRANCH, one that actively deepens character connections and their past within the world. It specifically remarks upon a MEMORY* rather than AN OPINION and will typically be LONGER.

Another good option is to PROMPT something following this:

ANON: CAMILLA, MAYBE YOU SHOULD TRY TAKING HARROW OUT TO DO [REDACTED] THAT SHE LIKES BEFORE XYZ?

and this can then spiral onward…

*DM, ONE TIME I ASKED ABOUT A MEMORY AND I GOT A RUDE ANSWER; WHAT DID I DO WRONG?

It's not that this topic can never be spoken about, it's about WHEN you asked it and HOW you said it, or even WHO you asked.

Some topics, like the nature of HARROW AND GIDEON'S UPBRINGING are too recent for them to talk about, it has only been TWO YEARS since they left and there are SPECIFICS about the situation that the AUDIENCE hasn't discovered yet. There are things like GIDEON'S PARENTS that she CANNOT answer because she DOESN'T KNOW and answering multiple asks with I DON'T KNOW becomes repetitive and dull for both the DM and PLAYER.

BUT! She can learn! Over time, when the time is appropriate and feels the most natural for STORY PROGESSION. Think of it like a BAD ENDING in a visual novel. You START OVER and ask a DIFFERENT QUESTION, or approach it from a DIFFERENT ANGLE. If Gideon reacts poorly to someone congratulating her leaving BAD CIRCUMSTANCES, consider talking to her about the FUTURE. Instead of trying to pry at Camilla to see if she had an INTIMATE RELATIONSHIP with Pyrrha, try to ask about other things in that period of her life, like how they met or what caused her to move out.

FINALLY, if you'd like an ask to be answered out of character, your best bet would be to goto @notedchampagne and send it there. If you'd like an ask to be answered SINCERELY or you don't want SNARK, you can specify this in the ask, but know this blog may not be your thing.

[tin-wufborf]

Tin's Favorite Sterek Fics (Part 16)

Hi there, and welcome back to Tin's Favorite Sterek Fics! I'm sorry it's been so long between installments this time. I started a new job last Wednesday which I absolutely love and am so grateful for, but it's got me working more and longer days (but with much higher pay), so I have been exhausted. Just a heads up, I'm probably only going to manage these on a weekly basis for the foreseeable future unless my workload suddenly lessens for some reason (which I have been assured that it will not).

Thank you all so much for your continued support of this series. It means the world to me. As always, I hope you're all having a good a day as you can, if not a great one.

Smoochies and squeezies, my darlings!

List and links to previous/next part(s) below the cut.

************************************************************************

DISCLAIMER: This is me warning you all that some of the fics I've included in this list may cover explicit, dark, and/or "taboo" subject matters. I cannot express enough how little I care what anyone thinks about any of that; all I want is for you to use caution when reading anything I've listed here and to please review and heed whatever tags the authors have provided in order to keep yourselves safe. Your experience from this point on is your own responsibility, not mine and not the authors'.

************************************************************************

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Part 6 | Part 7 | Part 8 | Part 9 | Part 10 | Part 11 | Part 12 | Part 13 | Part 14 | Part 15 | Part 16 | Part 17

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Que Dis-Tu? by isthatbloodonhisshirt (wasterella) (G | 1/1 | 2,594)

“What, are you gonna tell me you know Russian next?!” Stiles demanded, flailing one arm, other hand still closed around the spine of his book.

“I do know Russian,” Derek confirmed, still looking confused.

Stiles dropped the book so he could flail both arms in the air. “Of course you do! Why wouldn’t you know Russian?!”

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Your Royal Assholeness by isthatbloodonhisshirt (wasterella) (T | 1/1 | 3,327)

The second he walked in, Derek growled loudly and was beside him in an instant, reaching out to lightly touch his neck.

“Who did this?”

“What the hell is going on?” Stiles hissed in response.

“Your majesty.”

Stiles turned when the woman spoke, positive he’d misheard, but she was on one knee with her head bowed, and the wolves who’d all followed had done the same.

“Your what?” Stiles demanded, shocked, turning back to Derek.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

You Have Reached... by isthatbloodonhisshirt (wasterella) (G | 1/1 | 5,074)

“Why did you listen to the voicemails?”

“I like hearing you talk,” Derek said.

There were many things Stiles had been expecting after asking that question. That answer hadn’t been one of them.

“Any time we ever spoke before, it was always about what next problem we were facing and needed to solve. The voicemails are just you... talking.”

“Oh.” Stiles had never considered that.

(SNYE - January 10th - Long Distance)

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

In meeting his is born, In absence he has grown by lookingforatardis (T | 1/1 | 6,191)

The witch’s voice turned dark, powerful. Her head fell back as she chanted:

So it is written, so it becomes A debt for a debt A life for life, In the darkest of times With a mate by thy side In meeting he is born, in absence he has grown A son for a son, for the Highest Power, Her goddess the Moon draws balance once more With a love that endures. And so has been, and so it is, and so it will be.

- Or, A witch gives Derek a toddler after Stiles leaves Beacon Hills, and Derek definitely does not freak out about it and beg the Sheriff to call Stiles for help because he's his anchor (he definitely does)

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Choice by Omni (T | 1/1 | 8,613)

Derek knows what it feels like to not really have a choice, what it's like to be manipulated. He'd never take away someone's right to choose freely. The fear of even accidentally doing so is enough to hold him back from acting on his own feelings.

Stiles has never had a problem making his own choices, and fuck anyone who would try to tell him he can't.

(Or: Stiles gets bitten by a different alpha, but of course would prefer to have Derek as his alpha. And also just, you know, have Derek.)

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Wake Up Call by SylvieW (M | 3/3 | 10,084)

Derek has nightmares and now that Laura is gone there's no one to wake him up and comfort him.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Yes is a World by jezziejay (M | 1/1 | 10,207)

When the nemeton casts a protection spell over Beacon Hills, Stiles can finally go to college. Derek thinks this might be a good thing.

In which Stiles falls in love and Derek learns a lot.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Five Times Derek Heard Something He Wished He Hadn't, and the One Time He Did by isthatbloodonhisshirt (wasterella) (T | 1/1 | 14,841)

“This place is hell,” Derek decided. “This place is absolutely hell.”

How was it possible he’d gone so many years of his life without hearing anything nearly as over the top as he had just visiting Stiles at school? This had to be some kind of record for the most disgusting things he’d ever overheard.

--

(I mean really, the title says it all lol)

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Sigh No More series by elementalv (3 works | T-M | 16,472)

1. Sigh No More (M | 1/1 | 5,532) Scott respects Stiles’ decision not to take the bite right up until the day he doesn’t. That night, with the help of his father, Stiles leaves Beacon Hills for good. Warnings: See the Notes section at the end for warnings and possible triggers. The AO3 options don't quite cover what I need. 2. The Cave (T | 1/1 | 6,415) Chris has no idea how to salvage what was intended to be a diplomatic mission with an unknown alpha. 3. Winter Winds (T | 1/1 | 4,525) He hadn’t taken any particular pleasure in killing Peter for once and for all, though he was glad he’d thought to ask Deaton about what to do to make sure Peter couldn’t come back. Lydia wasn’t exactly thrilled with the countermeasures, but since it meant she wouldn’t have to raise him from the dead ever again, she dealt with it by making Scott pay in small ways and large. He accepts her treatment of him without comment, knowing that a lot of the mess the town is in could have been avoided if he hadn’t been such a dickhead all those years ago. And really, he thinks, as he’s patrolling near the Nemeton, dickhead doesn’t even cover what he did to Stiles.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The Sound of Silence by Asterekmess (Livinginfictions) (E | 6/6 | 17,279)

Everyone is so sure Derek is dead, but Stiles can't accept it. Not when there are so many loose ends.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

doesn't weigh me down at all by kellifer_fic (T | 2/2 | 17,657)

"Your brother is cool. What happened to you?"

"Har, har, hilarious," Stiles says as Scott grabs him in a head lock and rubs the top of his head. "He's going to hold this one over me for ages," Stiles sighs after a few minutes of the sounds of just their feet shuffling through the undergrowth.

"Could've been worse," Scott says.

"I guess so."

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Children of the Wild Ones by bellefire (M | 2/2 | 18,081)

One turned corner was all it took—a single split second decision. A death. Stiles could never decide if that turn had been a wrong one or a right one.

In which Stiles is turned, gets a pack and takes a roadtrip to Mexico with people he used to not even like but are now somehow family, but first: murder.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

discretion's not what i need to sell series by marinbel (3 works | T | 18,492)

Told in three parts, in three perspectives.

1. discretion's not what i need to sell (T | 1/1 | 2,024) Stiles raises an eyebrow. “So am I not correct then that I saw you leaving Allison’s place this morning? From her bedroom window?” His eyes give Scott a once-over. “I’m sure the healthy flush is just from the run, and no other activities. And- oh, hey, is that hickey on your throat also from the run? I didn’t know that could happen.” Scott’s jaw locks. Fuck. Stiles shoves his hands into his pockets, rocking back and forth on his heels. “Sorry, just curious. Since I thought you and Kira were still a thing, and all.” 2. one more confession (T | 1/1 | 7,395) He’s talking to someone on the phone. She hears him. “We’ll think of something. Don’t- hey, don’t worry about it. We’ll work it out. Okay? Okay. See you tomorrow, Babe.” The crack of light expands, Scott opening the door. He stops in his tracks when he catches Kira’s eyes blinking back at him. “Hey,” he says. “Hey,” Kira says back. “Who’s Babe?” “Hmm?” Scott goes, flipping the light off and coming back to bed, crawling under the covers and looping an arm around her waist. “You were on the phone with someone,” Kira says, like maybe saying it out loud will remind him of what he was just doing. “You said Babe. Who’s Babe?” . Alternatively, Kira finds out. 3. keep those tired eyes closed (T | 1/1 | 9,073) “You gotta let him go.” Derek watches him from the peripheral, dejected. He sees it just beyond his eyes, the ruminating and mind whirring and Derek says, “Hey. With me, breathe in.” He breathes in and Stiles follows along. “Breathe out,” they do so together, Derek saying on the exhale, “now let him go.” Stiles’ exhale is shakier but he gets through it. “I’m letting him go.” . Alternatively, Derek's trying his very best at being a supportive boyfriend.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Falling Up by PalenDrome (nerherderette) (E | 1/1 | 18,522)

Of all the things Stiles imagined could happen, he never thought he’d end up packless.

*****

Derek picks up his coffee and drains it slowly. "My place is a twenty-minute drive from here. I could show you, if you'd like," he says once he finishes. His tone is studiedly casual, but Stiles knows what a big deal it is. It's an offer to re-establish a connection with a former pack member. To invite Stiles into the new sanctuary Derek created for himself.

Stiles looks at his empty cup. He thinks of the miles he's driven. Of the motels and hotels and cheap campsites he's crashed at, and tries to keep his desperation to have something familiar, of not feeling so goddamn lonely, from his voice.

"Yeah. I'd really like that," he says, and if his heartbeat does a little swoop, Derek's too polite to mention it.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

To Find You Again by nightlight9 (E | 1/1 | 23,788)

The man standing on his porch waiting for him is unmistakable even after six years. Though his hair has grown out longer and there’s a scraggly beard covering his once bare chin, the unexpected guest is undoubtably Stiles.

Derek swallows and tries to subtly catch a whiff of his scent. Then he swallows again when he smells nothing but the Colorado trees.

“Stiles?” His mouth is dry. "What are you doing here?”

Despite the bags under his eyes, Stiles’ smile is bright. “Hey, Derek. I-. It’s been a long time. Can I come in?”

That's all it takes. Derek opens the door.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

If These Ears Could Talk series by HappyJuicyfruit (11 works | G-M | 39,686)

Stiles is hard of hearing, that doesn’t stop him from running with wolves. Doesn’t stop him from dating one either.

1. Clueless (G | 1/1 | 4,748) After everything they’ve been through together, all Derek wants is for his pack to be connected with strong, thriving, pack bonds. And for the most part, its working. The pack is growing, healing, happy. He just needs to figure out why Stiles hates him so much. 2. Pack is Pack, No Matter How Far (T | 1/1 | 9,927) Derek tries to deal with his pack moving away for college. Stiles helps (a lot). 3. Come Light A Candle With Me (G | 1/1 | 1,804) Derek celebrates Hanukkah with Stiles. 4. Worrywolf (M | 1/1 | 5,470) After a few worrying text messages, Derek decides to go check on his boyfriend during midterm week. 5. Memories From You and From Me (G | 1/1 | 3,070) On the anniversary of his family's death, Derek tries to distance himself from the pack. Stiles doesn't let him. 6. It's My Party, I Can Yell If I Want To (G | 1/1 | 5,496) Derek has made a lot of mistakes in his life, and he has a lot of regrets. Currently, his biggest regret is forgetting his boyfriends birthday. 7. I Can Help With That (M | 1/1 | 3,277) “You can’t be the only hard of hearing person on the campus.” Stiles shrugged, “so?” “So, why don’t you make a club or something? You don’t really know anyone else hard of hearing, it could be really good.” “Did Derek Hale seriously just tell me to make a club?” 8. I Do, I Do, I Do, I Do (G | 1/1 | 2,340) 8 years. Degrees, Master degrees, vet school, law school... It took 8 years, but finally, the Hale pack was together again in Beacon Hills. 9. As The Years Go By (I Just Love You More) (G | 1/1 | 1,811) It started with Becca, but it did not end with her. Or, how Derek and Stiles end up with a house full of kids. 10. Baby, I Was Born This Way (G | 1/1 | 1,051) He knew Stiles like the back of his hand. He knew that this silence wasn’t him. This stillness was unnatural. He’d been married to the man for twenty years. He had 8 kids with him. Stiles was a force of pure energy, he was a fighter to his core. It couldn’t end like this. 11. Oh, To Grow Old With You (G | 1/1 | 692) Derek yawned, looking out at his bird feeder as he waited for the kettle to boil. He would go out and refill it after breakfast. Do a morning walk around their territory. It would be a while before Stiles woke up, insomnia kept him up late most nights. And Derek’s bad back woke him up early. Werewolf healing didn’t fix everything, when you were old. Or, a very fluffy retirement.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

No Time Like the Future by isthatbloodonhisshirt (wasterella) (T | 1/1 | 40,590)

It wasn’t until he was ten that the full explanation came to him, because every year when a group of kids turned ten, schools had a one-day course specifically about soulmates, what they meant, and why everyone had weird writing on their arms.

Derek remembered sitting in that all-day class, completely horrified, and absolutely devastated. The course leader made it sound like a good thing. Soulmates were the other half of your own being, they were the person you were supposed to love and cherish, who would understand every part of you, and all that other garbage nonsense. He was not here for this.

It wasn’t that Derek had any understanding of love—not romantic love, and certainly not at ten years old—but he read a lot of books and watched some shows and movies with his family, and love looked like something different in those environments. Love looked like a choice, like the meeting of people, and the getting to know them, and actively falling in love with a person because they were amazing and nice and just fit.

Soulmates didn’t sound like that.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Nature Red In Tooth and Claw series by HaleHathNoFury (My_Trex_has_fleas) (4 works | T-E | 47,930)

1. Mockingbird Smile (E | 1/1 | 3,554) Kate has come to Beacon Hills to seduce Derek Hale and kill the Hale pack. Maybe she should have done some more research first. 2. Dirty Paws (T | 3/3 | 6,309) Every fairytale starts with a beginning. 3. In Our Town Of Halloween (E | 6/6 | 28,168) It's Halloween, the one night of the year the Hale wolves and their pack get to let it all hang out. Unfortunately for them, someone is on their trail and looking for revenge. What happens next will change everything. 4. Silver Bullet, Silver Arrow (E | 3/3 | 9,899) The Argents have come for vengeance. They're about to get what's coming for them.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

It Was a Wednesday by isthatbloodonhisshirt (wasterella) (M | 2/2 | 80,129)

“What happened? Where are you? What’s that sound?”

Derek jumped, having momentarily forgotten Scott was on the phone with him because Stiles had started moving. He’d stalked over to the other side of the cave, still eying Derek warily and growling, then settled protectively over a mass of clothes, leaves and animal innards. It was probably where he was sleeping.

Lovely. No wonder he smelled like death.

“Stiles,” Derek said, answering Scott’s question. Or, one of them, at least.

“Stiles? What do you—Stiles is making that noise?”

“Yes.”

“Why?”

“How fast do you think you can make it to the south lot of the Preserve?”

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Pretty Little Wolf series by ItsMe_Basil (3 works | T-E | 88,628)

1. Pretty Little Wolf (E | 35/35 | 82,164 ) Derek has heard stories about the Spark -the kind of stories that would have his younger self cowering under the blankets. The kind of stories that had Derek stick close to the pack. But when Derek is in trouble, and the pack isnt around, Derek finds himself in the care of said Spark, and he finds out fairly quickly that he's not all he seems to be. Stiles, he finds out, isn't a villain at all. Derek's only heard one side of the story for four years, and now it's time for him to hear the other side from his mate. *-* "Pretty little wolf," he hummed, stepping closer and kneeling beside Derek. Even in his death fogged brain, he recognized the words spoken. The words that were tattooed along his hip bone. The man reached a hand out, long bony fingers brushing against Derek's jaw. That's when recognition dawned on him. He knew this boy -not personally, but he'd seen pictures. This was the Spark. The one Scott had warned him about since Derek had returned to Beacon Hills four years ago. His mate. "Fuck me," Derek gasped out, dropping his head on the step. "Let's get you better, first, shall we, Puppy?" The Spark hummed. 2. Pretty Little Wedding (M | 1/1| | 3,650) Its been two years since the Hale pack moved to Hood River, and Derek couldn't be happier with his life now. He has Stiles, his family, and a town that treats them like family. Its everything he could ever hope to have. Almost everything at least. 3. Pretty Little Niece (T | 1/1 | 2,814) Cora and Lydia have a baby, Stiles and Derek fight about having children of their own, and Stiles slowly warms up to being an uncle! Part 3 of the Pretty Little Wolf series! If you haven't read thd first I recommend you do so!! These are just little snippets into the Hale packs life after they leave Beacon Hills!

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

************************************************************************

[contextfreepatentart]

Context-Full Patent Art

Every now and then I see people in the comments who seem to genuinely want a better idea of what one of the posted bits of art here was supposed to be patenting. Giving that context myself doesn't seem in the spirit of the blog, but I absolutely want to encourage people to do the legwork to go sniffing around for original sources.

It's something I have to do a lot in my day job, something I've learned to enjoy, and the thing that led me to start Context-Free Patent Art a dozen years ago in the first place.

Let's start with today's post, which is a perfect example of art that raises more questions than it answers.

Almost every post on this blog has a header detailing the date of the patent or application and the number, which you can find on the top right. In this case, this image is from Patent Application # 20020022516.

Longtime Context-Free Patent Art fans might remember this image from when it was first featured here over a decade ago. I figured that a lot of the people following the blog now haven't seen some of the gems from years ago, so I'm going to be doing re-runs of some of my favorites this week. There's a bunch more I think would be good to bring back, so I'll use the vintage cfpa hashtag in the future so you know when a duplicate post is intentional (as opposed to me just forgetting I've posted a thing before, which happens a fair bit).

Back to the matter at hand though, if you're ever curious, the US Patent and Trademark Office has a super-handy patent search function. It's pretty easy to find from their main site (uspto.gov), but you can also just bookmark this link to the basic search form:

Check out the search results, click on the link for the .pdf, and you'll get the complete patent/application to peruse at your enjoyment.

In this case, you'll find the patent being applied for covers a method of "Advertising inside electronic games" and you'll learn that:

In FIG. 1, girl 10 is climbing onto a hamburger 11 like one sold at a fast food restaurant. However, in the displayed image, hamburger 11 is as large as girl 10. The person playing the game will therefore perceive hamburger 11 as fantastically large. That unusual scale will help to burnish the image of hamburger 11 in the player's memory as well as draw his attention to it while he plays the game.

Not shown in FIG. 1 are other characteristics which electronic games could apply to hamburger 11 which cannot be shown in unanimated line-drawings. Hamburger 11 will compress as girl 10 steps or pushes on it. That action will be accompanied by squishing and slurping sounds...

Yeah, the explanations are weird too, sometimes.

Sorry for all the words, I just wanted to make it as clear as possible to people that if they're ever curious about stuff they see on Context-Free Patent Art, it's usually pretty easy to find out what the deal is.

[damnfandomproblems]

Posting a compilation of responses to Fandom Problem #5234

Anon:

PLEASE watch the Contrapoints video on Twilight. It is by a trans person named Natalie Wynn.

(anon includes a link to a YouTube video titled "Twilight | ContraPoints")

This video has changed the minds of tons of people who initially thought Twilight was "rape and stalking abuse", by explaining the history of where all this panic comes from and why people are drawn to dark fantasies. It changed my mind and I'm hoping it'll change your mind too.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Anon:

going through every point bc this personally ticked me off for literally no reason but i have nothing better to do. so. sorry if this seems overly pissy /genuine. (also typed this in my notes app so sorry for the lack of italics/caps in place of italitcs) 1. not wanting to see incest/whatever isnt purity culture. blocking tags/accounts that make you uncomfortable is something that is HEAVILY ENCOURAGED. the only people i have ever seen discouraging this are antishippers. what IS purity culture, however, is saying that EVERYONE ELSE should not make something because it makes you personally uncomfortable. as someone who was literally raised within purity culture, that is exactly the kind of shit they say. 2. fiction DOES affect reality! but not in the way you think it does. yes, propaganda works! but that is because it is specifically constructed to convince people of a certain view. representation is important because people who arent cishet white men exist and deserve to see themselves in fiction. but i think the best way i can explain it is this; if you were to watch Hannibal, would you automatically assume that cannibalism is okay? what if you watched a John Wick movie or Deadpool? Is mass murder okay? the answer is obviously an astounding no, because you are able to think about the media you consume. this is expected of any media that isnt literally a show aimed at children. There's at least one media btw. i'm not entirely sure about Hannibal because i've never seen it. 3. that is literally a coping mechanism therapists recommend. those are all UNHEALTHY and SELFDESTRUCTIVE coping mechanisms. you cannot compare the two. 4. if you are getting mad about porn then that is an entirely Puritan viewpoint. 6. "make the story frown upon it." if you cannot gauge for yourself that these things are bad then you should not be engaging with those stories. 7. last point isnt a proship issue, its a jerkwad issue. people who dont tag things are dicks, at least we can agree on that. however if someone doesnt tag something it is on you to block them. YOU need to curate YOUR online experience. (it may also be worth it to KINDLY send an ask about it. its the same as tagging flashing. sometimes people just dont think about it and sometimes people are doing it on purpose to be a douche. you need to block the latter as they are not worth your time or energy.) Last point was something you did not mention so im not including it in the list itself; if you were to ask a proshipper if they supported pedophilic/incestual/abuse relationships irl, they would most likely say no. If they say yes then they are just a pedo/someone who is okay with incest/an abuser. those people are not bad people because of the fiction they consume/create. they are bad people because they want to hurt people and do not see anything wrong with it/are not willing to see why they are in the wrong. apologies for any typos, ive reread through it but i tend to miss things.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------ Anon:

Op really just compared writing fictional scenarios with fictional dollies, a method of processing trauma that is recommended by psychologists and actually -is- effective at helping people process stuff, to alcoholism, street drugs, and socon which can and do kill people. You ever seen someone withdraw from alcohol abuse? I have. You actually spoken to a psychologist about friends who write things to cope after being raped at a party? I have. Are you still a clueless child? Yes. So take your moral panic and shove it. You're a kid but if you want to get involved in serious adult conversations, you need to be prepared to accept discussing serious, real things. You can't even look at a rapefic without getting triggered (I use this word in the proper sense, not hyperbolic sense) and ascribing blown-out-of-proportion, emotional judgments on people who, if you passed them on the street, wouldn't stand out to you at all. Because these are normal people. This to me is a huge sign you're just not ready for this kind of conversation.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Anon:

"...really ticks me off how someone can say "It's really fucking gross how you wanna see a minor and an adult make out" and proshippers can be like "UGH PURITY CULTURE" Like, how is not wanting to see pedophilia and incest purity culture. Especially when you're a minor. dumbass I was a minor when I wanted to se OCs modeled after myself hooking up with the hot adult leads from my shows. I wasn't stupid enough to think it was OK to happen in real life but if Dream of the Endless was in an arranged marriage with my OC for reasons I wanted to see it. Like. "Minors" have sex. A lot. And yeah, age gaps can be problematic in real life but on paper? Who cares? It's fake. It's not real. It's a story. Acting like minors are sexless little angels until the day they turn 18 is crazy. Minors want to see boning and they want to see people their own age boning, and sometimes they want to see people their own age boning That Old Man or Milfs or 1000 year old vampires or whatever. Not even gonna bother with the rest. Others can get that.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Anon:

Where to even start here? I guess I should start by saying that proshipper doesn't mean what you think that it means OP! It doesn't mean that we support incest or pedophilia, it simply means that we're anti harassment. I don't like incest or pedophilia. It's weird to me, and yet one of the most popular series, Game of Thrones, features both incest and pedophilia. Romanticizing villainy? Can I ask what your definition of romanticizing is? What if the story revolves around the villain? Like Ballad of Songbirds and Snakes? Are stories like that not supposed to exist? What about the anime and manga called Overlord? What About Hannibal Lecter? What about the Joker movie? Do none of these have any value? Do you expect the villain to deadpan into the camera every 10 minutes confessing that he knows his actions are wrong but he's doing it anyways? And if the writers don't make their characters do this, are you going to accuse them of condoning their characters actions? Because I think it would be pretty dumb to make a villain out of character for the sake of, "I know this is wrong, but I'm doing it anyways!" Do you want no villains in stories? Is that what you prefer? For everything to be sunshine and rainbows all of the time? Because that would be really boring. Are there any true heroes without a villain. A bad coping mechanism? Really? So now you're a psychologist who knows everyone on the planet that knows exactly what everyone needs to get better? Coping mechanism looks different from person to person. What is important is that the coping mechanism helps you process your emotions and what happened to you and sometimes it is helpful to write your emotions out in the form of writing and sometimes that can be fanfiction. I am someone who had been diagnosed with trauma and depression and I'm currently doing therapy for this and taking medicine. You know what's helped me all of these years before I started going to therapy on a regular basis? Characters with a lot of baggage like me. They can be hero or villains. I don't care which it is. If they have a tragic back story and I'm all over that. Fiction doesn't effect reality? It can and sometimes does. You're right. But you know who's problem that is? Your parents, the school system, and whoever else never taught you that fiction is fiction. That characters aren't real. If your parents let the TV or Internet babysit you growing up instead of being a parent and teaching you right from wrong, or being able to tell fiction from reality, well then that is the fault of your parents. Do you know who's not at fault? Stranger on the Internet. We're not here to hold your hand, you are not entitled to that. It is up to you to curate your own experience and mind your own business. If you don't like something, blacklist the tag, block the person posting it or log off of that site and find something else to look at. You think you've debunked everything, but really you're just naive and living in a fantasy world. The world is not an idealistic place, nor will it ever be and that is why these stories exists to begin with. Covering up everything that is bad in the world won't ever make it go away and that is reality. Period. Let people cope the way they need to, and unless you have degrees in psychology, you have no right to tell people what they can and cannot enjoy. Again, I myself would never write or read about some of the things that you've posted about OP, but will I continue writing about my trauma? I sure will, because it is something that I am still dealing with many years after it happened and I'm sure others will do the same with the things that they've had experience with, too.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Anon:

OP, one of your top posts is an AO3 reference and contains a link to an AO3 fic. In case you didn't know, AO3 was directly created to be a host for fanworks that got censored by other sites. Functionally, it is an archive, like a library. And like libraries, it hosts anything that is legal to host under US law. One major driving factor behind AO3's creation was the "Livejournal Strikethrough Boldthrough", an incident where "concerned parties" successfully lobbied to get Livejournal, a site that hosted writing, to remove its "yucky fics". Guess what? Gay fiction got removed in the process because, surprise, certain parties found that yucky too. (I'm talking about conservative groups who are obviously very anti-gay and anti-LGBT.) Here's one post about it: https://pretentioussongtitle.tumblr.com/post/624690560646676480/like-wathever-antis-delete-your-blogs-pls-thx So... You can't say you're okay with calling to censor things, without looking at the full picture and where it ultimately leads. You're asking for a lot of collateral damage. And like someone else said, engaging in discussions about heavy, adult topics with strange adults on the internet (and most of us are adults, OP) is very dangerous. There have been a lot of cases where someone has cried foul about certain kinds of fictional writing, only for an "anti proship" person to walk up to them and groom them, and it worked because the kid was under the pretense that the person was a "safe, good person". Please do not put yourself in danger and get out of the spaces you frequent.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Anon:

It's interesting you use Lolita as an example of what to do "right" when it comes to depicting things. You believe tons of media must be censored or kept away from the light of day, yet Lolita is an example of what to emulate to prevent that from happening? You would be very shocked to discover Lolita is among, if not the, most notorious piece of fiction for censorship groups to attack. So I really don't know if you fully understand what it is you're arguing for, here. You're just a kid, so I'm assuming you haven't actually read Lolita. That's the first thing. The second thing is, given the fact virtually all people who are invested in censoring and banning media actually hate Lolita, but you seem to have a totally opposite, 180-degree opinion about it, I have to wonder if you've happened to find a lot of random stuff from around the internet, but have yet to actually put it all together and cross-check everything to see if it actually makes sense. There's a lot of stuff in your post that is either plain out wrong, poorly strung together, or contradictory.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Anon:

I'm going to look real tinfoil-hatty in two seconds, but I swear some of y'all antis in the notes are following tags like "pedophilia" and "incest" and that's the only reason you found this confession. Cause I haven't seen half of you here before. And if so, that's kind of weird. I hope I'm wrong. To be fair there's no way to confirm either way but I just thought it was funny because I can see it happening if not for the antis here, than for others. Gotta get that daily dose of outrage.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Anon:

""Fiction doesn't affect reality" So why is representation so important? Why has propaganda worked so well?" you're taking this statement too literally. fiction obviously affects reality. if you cry over your favourite character's death, well there ya go. fiction has just changed reality. it made you feel sad things. representation is important because it makes those represented feel acknowleged and because it makes their existence more known to the world. propaganda is designed SPECIFICALLY to heavily affect reality. a doujin artist does not sit down and think "hmm. today i will draw a loli hentai to turn people into paedophiles". ""Well I'm not gonna become a murderer just because I've seen people murder in pieces of media" Name one piece of media where murder was portrayed as unironically, fully okay." as someone not well-versed in shooters, fortnite. murder is encouraged in fortnite. the point of the game is to kill people. i'd also like you to name one piece of media where rape is portrayed as perfectly fine and dandy. ""I'm coping with trauma" Well that's an awful coping mechanism. If you have been traumatized by incest, abuse, or pedophilia, why are you creating/consuming content where those are all romanticized?" because the fact that they're not alone in their suffering is comforting to them? as an abuse victim, i like characters with abusive parents. it gives me a character to sympathise with and characters to absolutely loathe with all my being. now that i think about it, i like that i'm not suffering alone. other people acknowledge the things i, and other victims, have to deal with. there are other reasons, but that's one i thought up ""You're ableist for criticizing our coping mechanism!" ... You know what else is a coping mechanism? Self-harm. Alcoholism. Excessive drug use. Those are frowned upon EVERYWHERE, because they're self-destructive. So why is thinking adults and minors should be cute together (sometimes real life adults and minors, but I'm not gonna get into the whole RPF discourse because RPF is even more fucking disgusting) suddenly okay?" there is a difference between doing things that being actual harm and because the latter is harmless. besides... isn't this circular logic? this argument is based on the conclusion you draw from it. "proshipping as a coping mechanism is bad because proshipping is bad". ""Rule 34 and gross ships is always gonna exist!" In our current world, bigotry is always gonna exist. Doesn't mean we should stop getting mad about it." bigotry excludes a specific group of often-innocent people for no reason. rule 34 is just porn of fictional characters. completely incomparable ""I'm exploring unhealthy relationships in fiction!" Okay then! That's great! Don't romanticize it. Tag it accordingly. Make the story frown upon it. Lolita, the book, frowned upon the pedophilia and thought it was disgusting. Do that." nobody romanticises anything. most loli hentai just... depict a loli having sex. it doesn't depict it as this amazing thing that you should dp. most lolicons that talk nabout wanting to fuck... idk, klee from the funny gacha game don't actually wanna have sex with kids. it's omly romanticised in-universeww, if you will. it doesn't say anything about it being good to do irl. and on nhentai, we use tags. we have a lot of 'em, including the recent 'kodomo doushi'. you jujst have to take a look at the tags section of a doujin and search for any tag you may not want you can also filter them in the search bar. we tag our shit, it's just your fault for being an irresponsible fuck. "But you're not gonna do that, are you." we will. the importance of tagging can NOT be stressed enough anon, i am gonna be blunt here. you are not smart. you did not debunk shit. god will slam the pearly gates of heaven on you for this post

[lefaystrent]

Me, Myself, and These Guys Who Kinda Look Like Me Ch. 5

Fandom: Sanders Sides

Pairings: Thomas/The Sides

Summary: It starts with dreams. Then Thomas starts seeing the dream people in the waking world.

Thomas doesn't know how to bring it up to anybody or if he even should at this point.

AKA, Thomas has to acknowledge the six colorful characters in the room, much to their long-awaited delight.

Ao3 Link: click here

Chapter 1, Chapter 2, Chapter 3, Chapter 4

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Patton, as it turns out, cannot cook. At all.

To be fair, none of them ever had the chance to gain prior experience. The singular two times the others did cook, it had been oatmeal and ramen. Not exactly complex meals.

They appeared to be relatively competent adults though. They had been observing Thomas for years and should be aware of the basics of cooking.

Oh. That's where things went wrong, didn't it? They had been watching Thomas. Not Gordon Ramsey. Thomas Sanders.

Thomas knows how to scramble eggs at least. The thing in Patton's pan right now? Not eggs.

"I just went to the bathroom for like a minute," Thomas says in that way that clearly means, "what the fuck happened?"

"Everything is fine," Patton claims over the smoking pan. "Question though, do you like your eggs extra crispy, or...?"

Thomas would just like to have a skillet after this.

The pan chooses that moment to inexplicably catch on fire. Which shouldn't be possible, but so were plenty of other things that Thomas has experienced in his life lately. Why not this too?

Thomas screams. Patton starts screaming too. Then Patton, in his hurried desperation to right the situation, goes to grab the pan not by the handle like a sane person but where the fire is. With his bare hands. Thomas knows they just had a conversation about how they couldn't truly feel pain, but that doesn't stop the spike of panic as he watches the disaster in slow motion.

Between one blink to another, Virgil appears. He doesn't rise up like Roman demonstrated yesterday. He bamfs in right beside Patton, snapping at him to stand back. Startled, Patton dodges back as Virgil takes control. He pulls the sleeve of his hoodie down over the handle to act as an unconventional potholder, and he rushes the pan to the sink. More smoke billows from the water splashing against the hot pan and the fowl smell of burnt eggs permeates the air.

"What were you trying to do?!" Virgil screeches, and Thomas senses that it's a rhetorical question meant to just make them reevaluate their life choices up to this point, but Patton answers anyway.

"My best!"

Virgil curses and ensures that all of the fire is extinguished before sagging where he stands. He leaves the tap on, either just in case or too tired to shut it off. Patton tiptoes up to him and tugs sheepishly at his shoulder.

"Kiddo? I'm sorry."

"Don't do that," Virgil growls. He holds himself up over the sink, hands braced on either side. "Way to scare the living daylights outta me."

"It's probably more my fault," Thomas cringes. "I left him without supervision."

"Aw, Thomas! Now just because you needed a potty break does not mean it's your fault! We're all adults here."

"Adults don't say 'potty' to each other," Virgil groans. He reaches over the sink and cracks open the window to let out the influx of smoke. "And do you realize how close you were to burning Thomas's apartment down?"

"Well, it was just the eggs–" Thomas tries to alleviate the tension, but Virgil whirls on him.

"It doesn't matter! What would you guys have done if I hadn't showed up when I did? Would you have just stood there screaming? Would you have grabbed the pan and knocked it over and then the fire caught onto something? You have to be more careful!"

Thomas and Patton shuffle guiltily. They could have handled the situation better, in hindsight. No excuses really. Thomas can envision that happening, the two of them freaking out so hard that they create an even bigger danger mess. What would Thomas have done if flames really did spread? Hurt himself trying to put it out like Patton had almost done? Run screaming and forget to call emergency services? They were lucky that Virgil stepped in, and it sounded like they had really scared him.

"Thank you, Virgil," Thomas says. "For coming when you did."

"Yeah, Virge, that was good timing."

"Did you know?" Thomas asks. Could they sense things from in their rooms? Like, could Virgil see what they were up to and came running?

Virgil scowls and crosses his arms around himself. "No? I guess my spidey sense told me that you guys were doing something stupid. Thought I'd check in. You're just lucky I was here."

"Yeah, you're right. Thank you," Thomas expresses again, and he puts effort into showing his gratitude with his eyes.

Thomas isn't sure, but Virgil's eyes might have gone a little glassy at that. Before he can confirm, Virgil spins around and shuts off the sink. "No need to thank me. Your pan's probably ruined anyway. And if you're hungry, I'll make you some more oatmeal. No one touch anything. Please."

Thomas politely requests toast to go with it because he craves carbs, and Virgil gives a long-suffering sigh and shoos them out of the kitchen.

"Do you think he's mad at us?" Thomas asks Patton when they're in the living room. He keeps his voice hushed. "What am I saying, of course he's mad."

"I think he's just worried. That's his way of showing he cares."

"I can't believe you guys tried to set the house on fire without me."

They both squawk and Patton falls over onto the couch at Remus's sudden appearance behind them. A smile curls up Remus's lips, his mustache twitching left and right, and his eyes narrow in glee. Virgil looks up sharply at the disturbance, notes Remus has joined them, and dismisses it with an eye roll. He continues bustling around the kitchen.

"We wouldn't do that to Thomas's home! ...on purpose."

"Lame. Next time, instead of cooking oil you should try kerosene."

Thomas, a man who loves to eat raw cookie dough, knows his limits. "That is not edible."

"No it's edible, just not advisable."

And there's Logan rising up. Thomas embraces the fact that his house will never be empty anymore. He crawls onto the couch beside Patton. If that puts Patton between him and the others, well that's just a bonus. He gives in to the urge to hide and rests his head on Patton's shoulder, more or less curling up into a ball against his side.

Remus bounces his hip against Logan to make him stagger. "Some people used to think lobotomy was advisable. Depends on who's doing the advising, don'tchya think?"

"Let me rephrase then, kerosene contains hydrocarbons which, were it to be consumed, could result in impaired breathing and eyesight, as well as internal burns, rapidly declining blood pressure, convulsions, coma-"

"Were you saying something, Nerdy Wolverine? All I'm hearing is blah blah blah."

It's entertaining to see how similar Remus interacts with Logan as Logan does with Roman. It's the flair for the dramatic and sass clashing with Logan's tendency towards the literal and common sense.

"Do you think they'd notice if we left?" Thomas whispers to Patton jokingly. When the other doesn't respond, Thomas looks at him.

Patton sits incredibly taut. His fingers bunch up in the material of his khaki pants. His eyes are glazed and out of focus, staring ahead and seeing nothing. Thomas doesn't think that he's breathing. Do they need to breathe?

Oh. Thomas should have asked first before invading his personal space.

"Sorry," Thomas says softly and scoots away, putting distance between them.

"Hm?" Patton hums absently. He blinks like he's coming back online and his head lolls around to Thomas. "What did you say?"

Thomas shakes his head quickly and hurries to busy himself with his phone. "Nothing, don't worry about it."

Patton doesn't quite frown, but he's pensive and pondering. Thankfully, he doesn't push and lets the awkwardness go.

Thomas berates himself internally. Why did he do that without asking first? Or just sit on the other end of the couch? He had been caught up in the emotions that they had shared earlier. This thing between all of them, this developing two-way friendship, is only just budding. He has to give it time for everyone's sake and not get ahead of himself.

If he's honest, his own needs are to blame. He could really use a hug. He's been cooped up in his apartment for days and he misses interacting with people. Like...normal people? Gosh, is that a rude thing to think about? He likes these people, he does... He just wants an unconditional display of affection with no weird strings attached.

Is it a good or bad thing that he doesn't have a boyfriend right now? He can't fathom how that would go. Who would want to stay with a person who is constantly haunted by dream people? Wait, wait, that raises the excellent question of what will Thomas eventually do when he does meet someone and gets back into dating? Is this– is this for the rest of his life?

Thomas can't pretend his attention is focused on his phone. It's not and the screen is black from disuse.

He didn't mean to face his impending fears this early in the morning.

Compartmentalize. He needs to do what Logan taught him yesterday. He needs to put these worries in a box, lock it up tight, and push it into the background. He's still recovering, and he hasn't learned everything about them yet. Let him deal with this when he has the energy and all of the facts.

Down the couch, he doesn't notice that Patton watches him with a pained expression.

***

After breakfast, Thomas evades the others by engaging his worst enemy.

Chores.

His hamper overflows from fire fits of days past. He tosses them in the washer, guesstimates how much detergent to pour in, and then starts the wash. He sets a timer on his phone on the off chance he remembers to obey the alarm and switch the load.

He stares at his bed in its sweat-stained sheety glory. It would take him all day along with his clothes.

No, Thomas, you will not be a gremlin. You're feeling better now, toughen up.

The gremlin part of his brain claws for a compromise. He has spare sheets. He can replace them now and wash the dirty ones tomorrow.

Changing them is easier said than done. The dirty ones come off swift, but the clean ones? Why does it take all the muscles in your body just to get a fitted sheet on a mattress? And by the time you've got wrangled the rest of the blankets and pillow cases? Phew, what a work out.

Thomas lays exhausted on the freshly made bed. He used to work out sort of, you know, before he got sick. Now he's a shadow of his former self. He shouldn't be this out of breath and wanting a nap. How weak, pathetic. A tiny whiny man.

...right, he's still sick.

He heaves himself up and tosses back some more ibuprofen. The fever hasn't returned exactly, or if it has it's relatively low. His joints protest like the old man he is, and there are other mild aches. If he pushes himself too fast, too soon, he'll just end up miserable. And he'll do anything to avoid that wretched migraine from coming back.

He lays back on the bed again, sideways across it with his legs hanging off. He basks in the comfiness. The others didn't follow him up or ask questions, for which he is glad. He doesn't want them looking at him like lost puppies whenever he leaves the room.

He stares at the popcorn ceiling and makes out shapes as if they are clouds.

He's going to have to change a lot of his routine, once he gets in the swing of it again. Maybe establish some boundaries? Even if they promise to respect his privacy, he isn't sure he'll ever be able to sleep naked again. Which sucks because that's his preferred method of pajamas. Clothes are terribly confining.

And what will he tell his family? His friends? He doesn't know if he can keep this a secret. He's incredibly inept at lying to those who know him. He gets too skittish, too overcompensating. It's laughable. They've already been worried enough about him these past couple of weeks, and that's just when he thought he was going insane. They'd see through any farce.

He can just never leave his apartment ever again. Is that an option? No one will ever suspect.

Actually, would anyone be able to see them anyway? If he walked outside his house, could his neighbors see them strolling along in the parking lot? And if they were now visible to everyone, would this bring like, government attention to him? What if authorities start questioning why these six guys who live with him don't have birth certificates or social security numbers?

Thomas daydreams city officials stopping by his house wielding warrants. "Sir, you're under arrest for harboring illegal dream people." And then he'd have a criminal record, and all his loved ones discover his dirty secret anyway. Awesome. Fantastic.

"Do you ever feel....like a plastic bag," Thomas sings quietly to himself. He sighs and rolls over onto his side.

Roman is reclined on the bed beside him. It's interesting, because it doesn't scare him right out of his pants (ha, Nightmare Before Christmas referrence). He's getting too used to them randomly popping up now. Man, he's really gotta have the boundaries talk sooner than later, doesn't he?

But it's not so bad. Roman lays there flat on his back, gazing up at the ceiling as Thomas had been. He wonders if Roman is mapping out pictures too, creating life where there once was none.

"I always loved to hear you sing," Roman confides. His arm floats in the air, hand dancing to an unknown tempo. "And perform. I used to memorize the lines right alongside you. I sang like I was a part of the show and not just an onlooker. I would pretend..."

His face is open and lost in memories. Thomas forgets his worries for the moment. The poignant tone of Roman's words, the underlying passion, it's entrancing in its tragedy.

Like Thomas's problems can ever compare to theirs.

"What would you pretend?" Thomas asks, hushed and gentle and not wanting to break the atmosphere.

The barest bit of pink tints Roman's cheeks. His lips quirk up as he glances at him from the corner of his eye. "I used to pretend I was you. Someone I respected and admired more than anything."

Thomas resists the urge to cover his face in a fit of bashfulness. It's not like he often has pretty guys in his bed waxing poetically about him. And here he has a literal Prince Charming who has been his unknowing personal backup singer for years.

Roman's smile morphs into a wince. He flops his arm down onto the bed. "My apologies, Thomas. I can't imagine how daunting this situation is for you. If you should need anything, even if it's for us to give you space, you have but to ask. I don't wish for us to burden you."

"You're not a burden," Thomas replies automatically, stubbornly.

Aren't they though? the ugly voice in the back of his mind says. He viciously beats it down and shoves it in his mental basement. He won't be that kind of person.

Roman turns his head to look at him, eyebrow raised. "Just earlier we set a fire. This is only the second day since achieving corporealness."

"In all fairness, it wasn't that bad. And Virgil was there to put it out. So it balanced out."

"Yeah, Virgil's good like that," Roman muses. He's scanning Thomas's face, searching for something. It reminds him of the subdued way he looked at the others last night, after he offered to carry Thomas to bed. The bit of cautious wonder. Of tender hope.

Thomas thrums a cadence with his fingers into the bed sheets. "I talked to Patton this morning..."

"Would you like to talk about it?"

Thomas nods. Well, as much as a person can nod while laying on their side. "Yeah. We kinda...talked about the situation, more or less. I told him I want to help you guys."

Roman is nothing short of stunned. Flabbergasted. Gut-punched.

They can't think that poorly of him, can they? To think it's that out of character for him? Roman just said he admires him. Thomas clings onto that.

"You do?" Roman squeaks out, and Thomas hates how bemused he sounds.

"Yeah, what I can I mean," he pours sincerity into his words. "I don't know how much a guy like me can do, but I'd like to try. I'm not going to kid myself and say this will be a walk in the park, but I'm sure we can all figure out something together. And... uh, if you want. I don't know if you'd be interested, but I'd love to sing with you sometime. If you want, I mean. Your voice, I mean, it's good. Really good. But only if you want, of course."

As he fumbles his speech, Thomas reminds himself repeatedly that Roman just expressed an interest in doing as much, and no this is not being too presumptuous.

Roman springs up, bolt upright. There's a feral, hungry glee that shakes him and he nearly squeals out, "Really?! Really really?!"

"Really really," Thomas promises, smiling up at him. The excitement is infectious and Roman launches into a whole tirade of song choices.

"We could do Hamilton! Or Disney! I'll make a man out of you! It's the boppiest bop to ever bop! Or no wait, a ballad! We could do a ballad! A piano cover of something. Better yet, we can write our own song! Thomas! Thomas, I have so many ideas, you have no idea!"

Thomas has awoken his inner child. It's Christmas and Fourth of July clashing in showers of sparks. There are stars in Roman's eyes, and he holds his fists up, knuckles covering a wild grin. He's bouncing in place on the bed and it's the cutest thing Thomas has ever seen.

"I'd like to hear them," Thomas says.

Roman needs no more prompting. He stretches out on the bed again, laying on his stomach. He kicks his feet up behind him whimsically while he gushes and makes callbacks to Thomas's past videos and expands off of those. He's talking a mile-a-minute and Thomas hardly needs to contribute. Nor does he want to. He wouldn't dream of interrupting.

This bit of his morning is not a chore. It's a privilege.

***

Lunch time rolls around. They only become aware of this in the midst of their brainstorming session because Remus throws open the door.

The closet door.

"Did someone order a pizza?!" he screeches loud enough to make ears bleed.

Roman's reaction is to grab the nearest object (a pillow) and catapult it at the intruder. Remus karate chops is out of the air.

"Have you ever heard of knocking!" Roman bellows. "Me and Thomas are having an important discussion that doesn't involve you!"

"You've been hogging him since yesterday! It's my turn to ride on Thomas the Dank Engine!"

"I haven't been hogging him!"

"Little piggy say what?"

"I haven't been hogging him! Just because you're jealous–"

"Oink oink oink! Here a pig, there a pig, everywhere a pig pig!"

"Why are you so insufferably juvenile?!"

"Uh, bitch, why do you have a stick up your ass? And not the good kind!"

"Fellas," Thomas says most agreeably, sitting up and clasping his hands in his lap. "I think we need to take a deep breath."

They both cut themselves off mid-insults. They glance at him, and yes it's clear that even though Thomas was the subject they were fighting over, they had forgotten he was there or that he can now witness their spats.

And gosh, isn't that bizarre? They're fighting over him.

Roman crosses his arms and sulks, appearing contrite. Remus puts his hands behind his back and whistles in a poor imitation of innocence.

These two might be worse together than Logan with either of them. That's just impressive.

Thomas clears his throat and embodies his best mediator persona. "Now Remus, was there a reason you came in here? You said something about pizza?"

Roman mutters, "He was making a stupid porn joke."

"You're stupid," Remus snipes back. Before Roman can sputter out a defense, Remus bounds over and snatches up Thomas's hands in his. "There's food downstairs ready for you. The nerd said it's important for you to eat to keep your energy up or whatever. I suggested you should just eat batteries, but nobody ever listens to me."

"I wonder why," Roman growls, but Thomas is already being dragged out of his room. Remus keeps an iron grip on his fingers and pulls him along.

There's an erratic edge to Remus's words while he babbles to Thomas. It's mostly nonsensical ideas, like a stream of consciousness gone straight to brain rot. It's peculiar as it is demanding of attention. A train crash he can't look away from.

As they descend the stairs, Thomas stares at their joined hands. He considers Remus's words from before. How much do the others really listen to him? Or to each other in general? What hidden dynamics are at play here?

The others are all waiting for them below minus Bowler Hat. The table is set for one, and it's actually not pizza. It's pan-seared porkchops with broccoli and mashed potatoes. His nostrils flair as the smell wafts over him. His stomach rumbles appreciatively.

"You guys didn't have to do all this," Thomas protests. He lets Remus steer him to the chair and plop him down. He keeps his hands on his shoulders. "I know I've been sick, but I can make my own food now."

Virgil gestures to the murdered pan in the sink. "Let's just say for all our sakes, we don't mind."

"Yes, it's no issue," Logan chips in. "We are more than capable of providing you with assistance. It is no trouble, I assure you."

"I set the table," Patton says with a tiny smile. "No more stove privileges for silly ole me!"

Roman indulges him with a clap on the back. "You did well, Padre. And everyone else! This is a meal fit for a king!"

Virgil scoffs, "It's just meat and veggies. It's not a big deal."

"I forgot I had porkchops," Thomas admits. "When did you guys even take them out to thaw? I didn't notice."

Logan refastens his tie, a little smug, "Last night. I theorized that by today your illness would abate enough to allow you to eat a proper meal."

"Well, I don't know what else to say but thank you." Would this become a thing? Should he let it be a thing? Would it be such a bad thing if he did? They could cook him food if it made them feel useful, and then he could avoid cooking and get to eat it all. Just himself, never sharing.

No, that just– that would be like having servants and would be a weird power hierarchy, and he's just not going to go that route. He's a big boy, he can cook his own dinners.

He picks up his fork to tuck into dinner.

"Are you going to hover over him for the entirety of the meal, Donny Whacko?"

Remus's hands are still clamped on Thomas's shoulders, and he remains standing right behind him. Thomas pauses with his fork in the air. He didn't realize when Remus had grown eerily quiet, but the chattering had indeed stopped, and he grips tighter at Thomas's shoulders.

"Remus?" Patton says, as gentle as a person encroaching on a wild animal that they just want to help. "You gotta let go, buddy."

At once the hands are gone from his shoulders. Then they return on the sides of Thomas's head, spindly fingers holding him in place while Remus delivers a loud smooch to the top of his scalp. Every hair on Thomas's body stands on end.

"Remus!!" literally everyone screams.

"What, like you all haven't been thinking about it too," Remus replies in his reedy voice. "I can't help that you're all horribly repressed."

Furious and flustered, Roman rolls up his sleeves as if he's going to remove Remus by force, but then he suddenly back pedals. His eyes shift from Remus to...something else.

"I do so enjoy you making my job harder," a voice that is certainly not Remus's comes from behind Thomas.

Thomas turns. His peripheral catches a minor struggle of limbs, a flash of yellow, and then nothing. No one stands behind him.

"Why does he have to be so dramatic?" Virgil groans rhetorically.

Logan answers him literally, "He does not have to, it is simply a life choice."

Thomas looks back at them. "Did Remus just get kidnapped?"

Patton attempts to smile through a grimace, "I think it's more like he was given a time-out."

"Was that Bowler Hat?"

"Yeah, he does that sometimes with Remus. Nothing to worry about, kiddo."

Thomas very much worries about it. They can't tell him not to worry about it after that. After Remus kissed him and got sent to baby jail for it. Thomas can't react to the implications of the sign of affection, that in particular is a bit too much right now, but he does race car drift into indignation. Regardless of Remus being overtly clingy, Thomas doesn't think he deserved to be dragged away like that.

HIs reaction is because Remus had just voiced how no one listens to what he says. And the way that his hands didn't want to let go of Thomas. A burgeoning sense of protection has him sitting down his fork.

"I... I think I would have rather talked about it," Thomas tells them. He surprises them, he knows he does. And maybe that's his fault with how readily he's shown to want to avoid the issue so far.

Logan is the first to act. He smooths down the front of his shirt and sits in front of him at the table. "If you would like to discuss, we can."

"No," Thomas shakes his head, tone firm. "I want to talk to you guys. All of you. An important part of handling things is communication, right? And the longer I wait to do this, the more we might misunderstand each other, and I don't want that to happen. I want us all to be comfortable. Not just me, but all of you guys too."

Patton takes a step forward, falters, then presses his index fingers together. "When you say all of us..."

Thomas's eyes narrow. "I mean all six of you. Would that be a problem?"

Patton throws up his hands and waves them around in distress. "No, no! Not at all! That's not what I meant." He too takes a seat. He leans over the table, trying to convey in his expression sincerity. "I'm sorry, it's just that, well we'd like to talk to you. We just don't want to overwhelm you all at once."

"And Bowler Hat, as you call him, may decline to come to the discussion table," Virgil points out.

"Why would he?" Thomas asks. "I just talked to him last night."

"You did?" Virgil spits out, eyes critically assessing. When he sees that Thomas does nothing more than raise a brow, he rolls his shoulders and puts on an unaffected air. "Okay, cool. That's cool. So you weren't...scared?"

"No? Why would I be?" Thomas asks.

No one answers.

Thomas looks from face to face. They're hiding secrets. Every one of them.

"Why would I be?" he says again, more soft in trepidation.

Logan's brows are furrowed. He taps a finger against his chin. "Thomas... did you notice anything...odd regarding his appearance?"

"You mean other than the caplet and gloves?"

"Yes, actually. What else?"

Thomas searches for an answer amongst then. Roman stares holes into Patton who squirms in his seat.

"What am I not getting?" Thomas questions Patton.

And there's the same guilty look in his eyes like this morning at the failed breakfast. "Thomas, how much did you see of him? Was it dark? Did you see him fully I mean? Or remember when you first saw us?"

Not that he noticed. Nothing that–

Hadn't Bowler Hat purposefully avoided him? He had been turned away, looking out the window. And he scurried away to the kitchen with Virgil first thing. And he didn't show back up until it was dark in his room.

"Is he...is he different?" Thomas asks them, borderline scared now. "Is he not the same thing you guys are?"

"Yes and no," Logan answers, too collected, too calculating his words. "He is similar to us in most areas in terms of our attachment to you and the state of our metaphysical beings. The largest difference is in appearance."

"He didn't want," Virgil begins, but trails off when everyone turns to him. He scowls and looks angrily at the floor. "It's not for us to tell. He was just afraid of how you'd react. He can't help the way he looks. He just is."

"The snake's already out of the bag," Roman says, remorseful. "Thomas, it's not that we didn't want to tell you. We just wanted to respect his wishes while giving you time to adjust. But I can see that it's causing you more stress than not. I'm not sure we can manage to convince him to come out, but we can tell you about it. The truth would've had to come out eventually."

He doesn't want them to feel forced to tell him anything.

He also doesn't like them keeping secrets that might affect him and each other.

It's a tousle between being a people pleaser and wanting some modicum of control back over his life.

"I want you guys...to feel like you can talk to me."

"That's all we've ever wanted," Patton whispers.

Thomas closes his eyes. He pushes his plate aside. "Then I think we need to talk."

[malewife-overlord]

Six Cycles Later -- Part II

no one asked for this. i wrote it anyways. for anyone who has not seen the fucking big as chunk of writing that was the part I, you can find it here. for anyone actually invested, welcome to part II! it picks up right where part I left off :)

if youre new here, six cycles later is a tf oc fic im writing about a seeker left behind on earth after the attack on autobot city, and a certain autobot who arrived on earth after going missing at the very start of the war-- both of whom are linked by the same desire to escape, and more alike than they'd think.

i consider this chapter to be a bit of a "transition" chapter, because it's a chapter where you kinda move from point a to b to get to c, lol. promise action and some delicious goodies are coming up in Part III :3 but we've gotta get there first.

word count: 7471

fic below cut! as usual, any nice comments or likes are appreciated u///u sorry it took so long to post this, im balancing writing with commissions and a full time job, so. idie a little but its okay

summary: invert goes to bali. she hates it. luster goes to the clinic. he hates it.

“Victory, cmon!” Invert stood before the double doors of the weapons vault, a frown etched on her faceplate. “Open the weapons vault! It’s an emergency!” 

Emergency protocol not engaged. Clearance level 3 required to access weapons vault. Present clearance level: 1. Weapons vault cannot be accessed.

“Victory!” She pouted, shaking a fist. “Come on! It’s me! I’m the only ‘con on this ship, I should have maximum clearance!”

Clearance level: 1. Weapons vault cannot be accessed.

“Victory!”

The ship gave her no response. Invert growled and tried the keypad again, then the scanner, then the keycard. Nothing. As if in warning, a loud buzzer sounded at the end, a illuminating a red light above the vault.

“How am I going to rescue my fellow Decepticons if I don’t have a weapon?” She asked aloud, glaring up, as if Victory would answer her. “I don’t even have proper blasters anymore!” 

Silence. Maddening, maddening silence. 

“Fine! Fine. I’ll make due. I’ll just run headlong into the Autobots and die, and no one will be left to maintain you! Then what?”

Nothing. 

A groan escaped her. “Really? …really. Fine.” 

She turned on her heel and stomped for her room, where she knew at least one weapon was waiting. It was dangerous, and could possibly blow up in her face again, and hadn’t seen actual use since the first test, but…well, it was better than nothing! And sure, she could access the weapons collection Starscream had in his habsuit, or the rare crafts Megatron had in his, but…

The punishment for even touching any of those would be far worse than anything the Autobots could do to her. She shivered and pushed the idea aside. Nope, not risking that. If she touched anything in their rooms, when they returned, they’d kill her. 

Then again, if she died on this mission, she wouldn’t have to worry about them killing her. 

Her personal pet project was in her habsuit, resting on the tiny desk she’d dragged into it. Her habsuit was at the very end of all the others–the Constructicons had had no desire to build it, so they’d shoved her in what had been the previous broom closet. The fact that she fit at all was a miracle, as was that they let her get away with stealing a desk for it. 

Perhaps after seeing what she’d started to make, they’d decided against reclaiming it. After all, not many bots could say they got to personally observe Shockwave working in his lab, and even fewer could mimic his proficiency with crafting weapons. 

She was not one of those fewer, but she had watched him work in the past. Being his personal lab assistant/slave had been eye opening in that way. And furthermore, it had led to her accumulating a few parts that would otherwise be impossible to acquire on Earth.

All of those factors combined to let her craft her own weapon. The intention was for it to be a sniper class with a greatly extended range starting at ten miles. That was to start. If everything went according to her dreams, it would be able to fire more than twice that on both planets and the cold void of space. 

Dreams, however, didn’t guarantee results. The prototype she kept in her habsuit had been her pride and joy until its original test fire had caused the damnable thing to blow up in her face, right in front of her fellow Decepticons. If anything had wounded her ego, that was it. 

And since then, she hadn’t bothered to fire it once. 

She stepped into her habsuit and observed her experimental weapon for only a moment before picking it up. This would be the second time it’d be in the field. She’d tweaked it over and over since that embarrassing day, changing the scope, the trigger, the barrel, the energon pump, and even provided ii the ability to transform. The latter wasn’t anything particularly impressive–the scope and barrel disengaged anyways to permit carrying it, and without the barrel the rifle was the same size as a blaster. Furthermore, despite its simplicity, the rifle had to be manually transformed, something that even simple blasters could pull off otherwise.

But it was her first attempt, her first real, genuine attempt, at making a weapon, and she felt she’d done a decent job for someone who’d never previously handled tools. 

It took a few seconds to convert the rifle, which was almost as long as she was tall, to its smaller, spike shaped form, which she then attached to her forearm via its magnetic underside. Utilizing it in jet mode would be impossible like this, but it was better to know she had a weapon than be a sitting quasiduck on her mission. 

Her blasters had been sacrificed to make the rifle. She sincerely hoped that the investment would pay off. 

“Alright!” She yelled, throwing her arms out. “That’s all I get, Victory! Just one experimental weapon! No blasters! No grenades! No fusion cannons! No null rays or swords or electric staves! All of which I could use if you’d just open the weapons vault! Are you really going to send me off with only this?”

Judging from the lack of response, it seemed that yes, it was. 

Frag this. She kicked the doorframe and stormed Skywarp’s habsuit. He was bigger than her and would make her life a living hell for two chords, but he’d get over it. Besides. She could punch him back without anyone giving her trouble for it. What occurred between Skywarp and whoever punched him stayed there. 

His habsuit was sparsely decorated, and what existed in it was usually so filthy no one else would touch it. Today she lowered her standards and grabbed one of the blasters she knew he kept under his berth in the hopes that no one would find them; considering how often he had his own revoked, and how much the others hated him, Skywarp had found it necessary to maintain some form of private collection, if only for self-defense from revenge that was absolutely earned. 

And now his constant need to misbehave was paying off: she wouldn’t be entirely unarmed for this flight, and having a sidearm was better than gauging her hopes on an experimental rifle. 

Attaching the blaster to her other forearm, she made for the hangar. Her tank felt like it was fluttering with each step. A quick diagnostic scan revealed nothing unusual–nothing besides her own wiring. For this first time ever, she was going to visit the hangar and take off from it.

The idea that she was flightless was, in truth, only partially correct. Invert, like all Seekers, had been forged with wings on her back. Yes, they were upside down, and yes, when she transformed, they pointed the wrong way, with the delicate trailing edge leading as opposed to the leading edge itself. This caused the angle her wings made to work against her, and normally kept her out of the air. But a messed up angle alone was not enough to keep her grounded forever. 

An Earth plane would struggle and stay put, never to dream of the sky. A Cybertronian would reason that with enough Energon and determination, anything could be done. And that was exactly how she intended to fly to Bali. 

She could fly. The force from her thrusters alone, once in the air, could keep her going upwards, though they would consume Energon at a rapid rate. For this reason she visited the Energon vault and procured five additional cubes–her present fuel levels were adequate enough she felt no need to recharge. As long as she kept her thrusters engaged and made sure to ride the wind currents of Earth perfectly, she calculated a likely path to Bali that only had a 32.6% chance of her crashing and dying in the process. 

Odds of 67.4 percent seemed favorable enough to her. She paused before the double doors of the hangar, vented, and opened them, stepping in.

“Victory, elevate the hangar.” The entire structure rumbled as it rose, the whoosh of water outside indicating they’d broken the surface of the ocean. She could hear waves beating against the metal. “Open. When I leave, return to the bottom of the ocean. I’ll be back. Even if you don’t seem to want me to.” 

She grumbled that last part.

The hangar doors opened. Bright sunlight poured in, causing her optics to readjust. She blinked a few times and took several steps forward, gazing out at the outside world. 

The ocean seemed to go on for eternity. Its color was a deep blue. White peaks formed and faded away as they crashed over and over against on the hangar. 

Above, the sky was cloudless. The winds were strong, rushing past her and howling in the enclosed metal environment. It was a good day for a flight. 

Invert returned to the back of the hangar and pulled up the coordinates in her hub. Approximately 8,502 miles. She’d cross it in a few earth hours if everything went well. 

If.

The Energon cubes felt heavy in her chassis as she transformed, lowering to the ground. The movement of her wings, shifting to her sides, becoming the things she’d have to rely on, felt wrong. It always did–like going from standing on two steady pedes to posing on one’s servos. One was natural, normal, comfortable, done without even thinking. The other required precise balance, intense focus, and a constant consumption of energy to maintain. 

She’d be more used to it if they let her practice more or gave her some lessons, perhaps. Perhaps they would do just that when they came back. And when they came back, they’d be proud, perhaps, of what she pulled off while they were gone. 

Giving her fuel supply one final check over, she engaged her thrusters and charged forward. 

Just like what you’ve seen Starscream do. Engage, shoot forward—

And she plummeted, shooting right into the ocean instead of the air. Spluttering, Invert turned back and barely managed to regain her balance before smashing into the seabed. A school of fish shot away from her, followed by some of the many legged organics and one of the squishy, color changing ones. 

She groaned, knocked a fist against her helm, and turned back to Victory, determined to try again. She’d get this right. She had to. 

She wouldn’t stop until she did.

—

Eight hours was all it took to reach Bali with the speed she maintained once airborne. High above the cruising altitude any human plane would comfortably fly at, she watched the unbroken ocean, speckled ever so slightly by the white peaks of breaking waves, and read over the logs on Insecticons. According to the writer of the Decepticon database, Insecticons were about as useful as unrefined Energon and equally likely to explode. Good to know. 

They were also incredibly disloyal. Of the three, Shrapnel, Kickback, and Bombshell, none had any kind of investment in the Decepticon cause. Their adaptations had given them the ability to consume organic matter and drastically increased their hunger. All they cared about was food. 

That would be troublesome, if she took them back to Victory immediately. With how low the Energon supply was getting, even one of them deciding to stuff himself could mean that the Decepticon cause on Earth died, permanently.

She’d have to approach them cautiously, without the same hospitality she’d extend to her fellow ‘cons (a good punch to the face, usually). What approach she’d provide, she’d have to decide, soon, since the coastline of the island nation had just manifested on the horizon–

When a warning suddenly appeared on her hub, covering almost her entire vision in red:

LOW POWER. ENERGON LEVEL: 10%. SEEK IMMEDIATE FUEL SOURCE. 

She cursed, but before the word could even escape her, her body convulsed, forcibly transforming back into its robot mode. Her nose cone dipped before turning back to her chassis and head, leaving her plummeting head over pedes. Her balance modulator began to scream in its efforts to right her, only to immediately disable as the rest of her forcibly entered power saving mode. 

The ocean was coming up fast. The wind whistled past, blocking out her audials. Tumbling over herself, Invert tried to use the boosters in her struts in an effort to slow her descent–and their force promptly made her tumble even faster. The world became a blur of blue as her systems flashed every warning under the sun. 

Then she hit the ocean, and the impact was so painful she momentarily offlined. Something cracked. Pain shot all throughout her frame, a damage report automatically pulling up in her hub as she sank below the greenish water, straight to the bottom below. 

It wasn’t a long drop, but just the act of hitting the sandy bottom exacerbated the pains shooting through her frame. She may as well have hit a wall at full speed. Blinking her optics several times, her damage report finally came into proper view. 

It wasn’t particularly savage, but neither was it promising. As she moved her arms to pull herself from her prone position on the seafloor they creaked ominously, the sound accompanied by broken glass spilling from her cockpit onto the sandy bottom. Glowing Energon joined it. 

That got her up. She practically leaped to her pedes, grabbing the cubes and stuffing them back into her chassis, cursing a storm as two of them began to leak. Cracks were apparent in both, and the delicate energy they provided bled out into the ocean currents. Two would be an entire recharge for her–she couldn’t let them go to waste. 

Pressing her servos against the cracks and praying that would be enough, she swiveled her helm, searching for the shore. The water was shallow–only about fifty feet, if her depth meter was to be trusted–but the open area she’d found herself in was still miles from shore. 

Miles she would not make without more Energon. Grimacing, already aware of just how poorly this would fare for her tanks, she brought the first of the cubes to her dermas and forcibly gulped it down, taking in far too much seawater in the process. Warnings popped up about contaminated fuel, followed by analysis of the contents: 96.5% water, 2.5% salts, .2% inorganic particulates, .8% organic particulates. 

The latter part almost made her purge what she’d consumed, but she kept it down. It was energy enough, she wouldn’t have to do it again and once she was back on land she’d purge anyways and forget that this ever happened. Tossing the empty cube aside and pocketing the second, she checked her map again for which way was land. 

North. She took off in that direction, the sandy floor gradually turning into some kind of living rock formation. Slimy looking organics of odd shapes populated the colorful stones, darting away as she stepped on and crunched them with ease. They left slime on her plating, which did not help her growing desire to purge. Stepping over what seemed to be an entire shelf of the organics, her helm finally broke water.

Ahead of her was a beach densely populated with humans. Around her, gasping and shrieking as they swam away, were more humans, all of whom had been previously enjoying themselves, somehow, in the ocean. 

She gave a dirty look to the closest ones and stomped forward, gradually rising out of the water as she approached the beach. The humans occupying it screamed and scattered, abandoning their little colorful fabrics and strange striped pole structures. A few foolish ones froze in place, staring at her in awe. 

Dripping with saltwater, covered in slime, and with a broken, gaping cockpit on display, Invert didn’t have the time nor patience to put up with any of them. Decepticons hardly had any concern for humans anyways, but it was generally discouraged to avoid stepping on them–it ruined your paint. 

Considering the damage her beautiful lime green had already attained, she didn’t think she could care less now. 

“Hey!” 

With her map pulled up in her main hub, she hadn’t noticed the one human that, as opposed to running in fear, had frozen up and stood their ground. She glanced down, spotting a tanned one just by her pedes. 

“Are you one of those Autobots?” 

The question actually made her pause for a moment, considering the Decepticon brand on her wings. If she were feeling a bit more patient or playful, she might tell him yes, she was, and he and all his friends should absolutely be fine with her holding a few of them for potential hostage situations later. Perhaps she could convince them to take her to her quarry without even an ounce of concern that they might call for help. It was an action that would make strategic sense, that any intellectual Decepticon would leap at. 

Invert, however, was tired, cranky, and not particularly fond of anything made of metal at the moment. 

She bent and flicked the human aside, not paying any attention as to just where the hell it might have landed. Humans. Worthless, bold, idiotic creatures. So tiny and delicate. And yet they still thought they could talk to beings like her. 

“How much longer till I get there?” She asked her systems as she headed off the beach, crunching a few human structures along the way. It responded with a calculation of the remaining distance to her quarry: halfway across the island, nestled in a ‘mangrove swamp’. Another thirty minutes of walking. 

Her pedes crushed plants and bent concrete as she followed the straightest path, ignoring whatever might have been built upon it. Humans panicked and ran in all directions to avoid her, their tiny screams grating on her audials. They were turned down in response, muting any potential crunching that may have occurred as she kicked aside a wooden structure marked with the image of a cone. The humans and their worthless, useless, delicate structures, were left behind in no time. 

And foolishly, she did not once consider that one of those screaming, fleeing humans might have called for help.

—---------------------

The coordinates lead her to a swamp. After a good ten minutes of walking, Invert found that the island gave way to less populated areas, rife only with animal and plant based organics. They were no more pleasant to deal with, but they didn’t scream nearly as much, and their movement patterns were relatively predictable. They fled to the undergrowth and hid there, as if they were praying she’d leave them alone. 

Good organics. They knew where they belonged. 

As she neared the swamp the dirt moistened, sticking to her pedes, and the water made its damnable return, flooding the land and forming pools that ran up her cadulens. The trees lifted themselves upon their roots as if they intended to walk away, forming cages which entrapped more organics within them. It seemed to her like a great prison, formed by the rejects of the Earth itself.  

Her map suddenly lit up, providing her with a name for the place she’d stepped into–the “Demon Swamp”. An informational packet came along with it, indicating that the Insecticon ship was nearby and that her Decepticon brethren had visited this place prior. She ignored everything except the part about the Insecticons. 

Invert was hasty, but not stupid. She done her research on the three of them during her flight–it had been difficult with the amount of focus she’d had to maintain at all times, but she’d pulled it off, because unlike some other one trick mechaponies in the cause, she could be taught how to do more than one thing. 

Of the three Insecticons, her greatest interest was in Shrapnel. They all seemed like frankly awful comrades, but the ability to produce clones was undeniably powerful. It wouldn’t matter if she was the last Decepticon on Earth. It wouldn’t matter if she only found him. It wouldn’t even matter if he could only make a few clones–a clone was still another robot, and numbers were what they needed more than anything. 

Silently, she hoped that he was the one who had created the distress signal, and that maybe, because of his electricity powers, he’d caused that infernal buzzing. It made sense. What else could have?

She made her way through the Demon Swamp cautiously.. For all she knew, Autobot soldiers were waiting around every corner. But more than that, the environment itself was actively hostile to her kind. 

The water was brackish, and sediment easily gathered between plating. The air was humid, which could clog vents. Organics constantly chirped in the background, distracting audials. The foliage from the mangrove trees moved constantly in the wind, requiring constant optic adjustments for lighting. And the water she waded through gave her position away to anything with ears in the general vicinity.

There was no approaching stealthily, not with the twisting roots that threatened to constantly trip her or the water that sloshed and bubbled like it was boiling. There was so much noise, even with her audials turned down, it was almost difficult to think. 

And that didn’t even begin to cover the constant buzzing that had risen into the air, one that she recognized. She was approaching the ship, she could feel it. Her map was pinging wildly, her coordinate numbers were rapidly growing smaller, and the buzzing of the signal, audible to everyone in a mile radius at minimum, was practically screaming. 

Actually…she paused, disabling her coordinates and turning her map off. The buzzing was still audible. Raising a hand to her helm, she disabled her comms as well. 

The buzzing was still audible. 

It wasn’t a signal, then. 

She took in a sharp ex-vent and continued forward, the mangrove trees overhead beginning to close together, blocking out the sunlight from above. The route she was following had taken on the qualities of a tunnel with mangrove roots forming its walls. They twisted and crawled over one another like tentacles. It made her plating crawl. 

The path curved sharply. She was met with a curtain of organic filth, gray and twisting. The buzzing had turned to almost shrieking now, and her scanners indicated that Cybertronian technology was very close now. Grimacing to herself, Invert grit her dentae and shoved the curtain aside, convulsing only slightly as it draped over her plating. It worsened her desire to purge–but that wasn’t the only contributor to the growing feeling. 

Before her, nestled in a massive grotto, was an old, crashed ship of Cybertronian origin. The doors to it had long been blown off and water had pooled over its floors. Organic filth grew over its top and mangrove roots had looped over its wings, trapping it in place. Its interior was pitch black, but she could detect some kind of movement from within. 

From the heart of that dark void the buzzing originated, sounding like the shriek of static. And just below it, she could hear a voice. 

“LET ME OUT! LET ME OUT!”

—---------------------------------------------------

Seek alternate fuel source.

By the time Uptick’s data package sent him the notification to end recharge, Luster still hadn’t managed to offline for even a moment. Throughout the entirety of Earth’s night he’d laid still, listening to the endless humming that droned in his processor while watching the light of the moon creep across the floor. Earth’s moon was a small satellite structure about fifty times smaller than the planet it orbited. From the safety of the organic’s home it appeared as a particularly large orb in the sky and went through eight different phases: full, waxing gibbous, first quarter, waxing crescent

He vented harshly at the image and promptly sat up, the constant pinging in his helm only now properly registering. Uptick had so graciously set an alarm for him that was thirty Earth minutes prior to when he was expected at the clinic. As if on cue, he heard a knock at his door, and a quick check of the electrical field coming from outside told him all he needed to know of who was waiting for him. 

A comm arrived in his link before he could disable it. Despite the alarm literally ringing in his processor and telling him to get up, which Uptick would know he was presently experiencing, another notification from the same mech now waited patiently in his inbox, politely and firmly reiterating what had been told to him the night prior. 

It would soon be time to go to the clinic. He was not permitted to avoid or skip this appointment. He was on his second strike, and a third would mean that he would go into lockdown. They did not want to make him a prisoner. This was for his own good. 

Tank capacity at 50%. Fuel uptake at 15%. Seek alternate fuel source.

He didn’t manage to close the notification in time and it promptly opened a dozen more. Groaning to himself, Luster slammed his helm into the nearest wall, the damage report temporarily clearing his hub. 

Another comm and knock arrived only a second after he completed the action. If his optics could roll into his helm, they would have. 

‘I’m up,’ he sent back. ‘Out in a klik.’ 

His comms were promptly disabled, blocking out Uptick’s response. Then, the damnable alarm that hadn’t once stopped ringing was seized, taken to the back of his processor, and disabled in the least humane way he could imagine. Lastly, every last notification was closed and its accompanying pop-ups blocked. 

Finally, a moment of quiet. He swung his legs off his berth and took in a few ex-vents, mentally preparing himself for just what he was going to experience at the clinic today. During his last visit, they’d given up on trying to get him to manually recall the details of his trip. Whispers between the medics had agreed upon bringing in “the big guns”. 

Whatever “the big guns” meant, he couldn’t say he was eager to find out. 

There were guesses he’d had towards just what such a term might be referring to–a psychic patch in, perhaps, or maybe the complete removal of his processor for dissection. Maybe they’d do a deep scan and recreate him in a digital space, just so they could pick him apart like a particularly interesting puzzle. 

That was all he was to them. A puzzle. Something to be solved, categorized, put together, pulled apart, and put away once solved. 

He couldn’t even solve himself. What made them think they could do it?

Uptick pinged him again. It had been exactly 16 kliks of blissful silence. Luster vented and stood. Despite his tanks remaining half full, he could feel the aggressive pangs of hunger nipping at him, ever on the edge of his mind. They were pushed aside as he tapped the keypad to his habsuit, opening the door. 

Uptick stood just beyond it, taking up the entire frame and more with his bulk. He stepped back when the door opened, a mandatory smile crossing his faceplate. 

“There you are! That’s the fastest you’ve ever arisen!” He beamed at the prospect of his work bearing fruit, which Luster found annoying. “I’ll keep this in mind for next time. Now, are you ready to go? If we’re early, they might be able to admit you faster, which means a shorter session, eh?”

“Sure. Shorter.” He grumbled and slinked past Uptick, who closed the door he’d left open and followed along. 

~

The clinic he visited on a weekly basis was located on the opposite side of Metroplex, towards the back of his city form. During the war, there had been dozens of buildings just like it, designed to hold the wounded and dying. After the assault on Autobot city and the incident with the Chaos Bringer on Cybertron, many of the clinics on Earth had closed down as the medics and doctors returned home. There were, after all, far more injuries and casualties on Cybertron, even without the war raging. 

The peace of Earth had seen all but two clinics close, which were kept open out of necessity. Rare as it was, on occasion an Autobot might return from sparring with half his arm blasted off, or from a drive amongst humans with his front completely ruined. Humans, as Luster had quickly come to learn, were awful navigators and drivers. They ran into everything from still trees to moving cars to thin pedestrians on the side of the road. 

And sometimes they ran into Autobots, and what was merely an inconvenience for them was a fatality for the fragile organics. 

He didn’t feel quite strongly about the humans. They were alright. They were small, and weak, but surprisingly intelligent. They thought he was fascinating and scary. Some thought he was a friend. Many had grown accustomed to his kind, and would look at him with expectant eyes. 

He couldn’t offer them anything. He didn’t know why he intrigued them. The less interactions he had with the small things, the better, he supposed. The only slightly less maddening thing about their company was that the beat of their ‘sparks’ didn’t drive his processor crazy. 

Which was reason more why he despised the clinic. If there were weak in Autobot City, they were here. And the weak…the weak made easy prey. 

The streets were full of Autobots this early in the morning. Most everyone was up at this point, stretching their legs, tires, and waking up their engines. With every Autobot that dashed past them, racing along eagerly in alt mode, Luster felt his solvents building. The clinic was within sight, and he could see a black and yellow mech lingering by it, chatting up one of the nurses. 

Their sparks were so bright he could almost see them through their plating. 

Seek alternate fuel source.

Luster staggered to a halt in the middle of the street, venting harshly as he slammed a fist to his helm. 

Uptick startled behind him, instantly raising a hand. “Luster? What’s the matter? Are you alright?”

He gagged, hissing through his dentae. “I…I need to leave. Now. I need–”

“Now is no time for cold pedes.” Uptick said firmly, crossing his arms. “I know you’ve been opposed to these sessions, but the medics have assured me–”

Seek alternate fuel source.

The notifications were building nonstop. He couldn’t focus on moving, ignoring the sparkbeats, tuning out Uptick, resisting his aching tank, and closing the pop ups, all at once. He needed just a moment of calm, anything to temporarily turn it all off. 

“I need Energon,” he spat, ignoring whatever else Uptick had said. “Now.”

“Luster–!”

Jerking away, Luster staggered in the direction he knew the bar to be in. Three streets over, seven blocks down, take a left at the lamp post, follow the street until you see a lit up sign–

“Luster!” Uptick yelled, catching up with him in a moment and grabbing him by his shoulders. Luster growled and tried to shake him off, but he held on, turning him around like he was only an indignant sparkling. “You are absolutely not visiting the bar again. I tolerate this habit of yours on your best days, when it is appropriate to do so. Believe me when I say this, I understand how… appealing it can be to try and drown yourself in energy when you’re faced with the horrors of the past. But you…you’re taking it to dangerous levels.” His faceplate was more stony than the diamonds in Luster’s helm. “And I know for a fact that your tank does not empty at a rate so rapid that you’d need to refuel after only six hours of recharge.” 

“I didn’t recharge,” Luster snapped back, reaching up to grab one of Uptick’s servo’s. “I couldn’t offline for even a second last night. I’m starving, I need Energon, Uptick!”

“You need to stop acting like this!” His grip only tightened as Luster scratched at it, some of the white paint chipping away. “Avoiding your appointments to drink at the bar won’t change anything for the better, Luster! If you keep resisting change, you’ll end up trapped in the past!” 

The street had been sparsely populated only moments ago. Now, Luster was aware of other Autobots pausing in their going-ons. Several helms poked out from buildings, curious to see exactly what one of their enforcers had caught. 

He didn’t want to make a scene. The last thing he needed was more Autobots in the area around him. The quiet pounding sounds rapidly surrounding him were like drums on a quiet evening. But before he could even try to look around another notification popped up. 

Feed.

“It’s not about being stuck, idiot!” He screamed back, a snarl twisting his faceplate. He could feel the metal threatening to crack and break apart at the seams, right where his jaws would hinge. “I NEED this, or I’ll offline! I’ve got a fuel deficiency!”

“DON’T LIE TO ME!” Metal creaked as Uptick’s grip suddenly tightened, earning him a hiss. “I’ve have personal access to your file! There’s nothing wrong with your physical health!” 

Nothing wrong? NOTHING WRONG?!

The file was already so wrong by claiming that, and none of them even knew it. 

Seek alternate fuel source.

There are many sources nearby. 

“Is that so?” He grit out, feeling something on his back shifting. “Is that what they told you?” 

Was it so, Uptick? Would it always be so? Would it be so when he broke his faceplate, snapped his servos, and–

And what was he thinking?

He froze in the middle of forming his next sentence, voice dying before it could make any words. There was something shifting on his back, beneath his drill, and it replaced all the anger he felt with instant fear. There were witnesses. There were Autobots he knew around. If he let any more of himself slip, he would never speak to any of them again. 

The fight left him as quickly as it had entered, uselessly bleeding out like the Energon in his tank. Uptick seemed to sense this, his own rage subsiding, loosening along with his servos. Their impression had been left behind in Luster’s shoulderpads. He’d barely felt them bend, hissing only out of reflex. 

It was supposed to have hurt. He hadn’t even felt it.

The noise was coming back now. It was accompanied by the voices of other Autobots. He was suddenly so aware of the gazes upon him. Standing in the middle of the street by the clinic, he’d made himself the spectacle of the sector. And Uptick…

“We’re here early,” he muttered, venting quietly. “If you attend, and give them no issue, then…perhaps after your appointment…I…” He trailed off. “Your favorite refuge, it’s the Lead Pigeon, right?”

Luster did not look at him, or anyone, for that matter. Numbly he headed for the doors of the clinic, the red and orange nurse from before waiting for him. Uptick said something, following him halfway to his destination before stopping in the street. The medic cast him a glance before focusing back on her patient. 

“Luster! It’s good to see you.” The nurse held out her arm and spoke like she hadn’t watched him almost assault an enforcer in the street. “We’re almost ready for you, if you’ll just follow me. Got to take vitals.”

“Right,” he muttered, the noise of his notifications starting to drown out the street he’d left behind. Amongst it all, a ping came in from Uptick. He lingered over it for a few seconds as his body trudged along, leaving his mind stuck at the doors of the clinic. 

“Luster?” The nurse stopped by a machine. “Please step on the scanner.” 

He dismissed Uptick’s ping and obeyed. 

After the initial scans, he was led to the back of the clinic. The nurse took him to a small room with an examination table and a monitor. He moved to the table while she retrieved her datapad and tapped him in, the door sealing shut behind them. 

He’d been to the clinic a dozen times before, but it was the first time they’d taken him to this individual room. It was smaller than he’d thought they’d put a mech of his size in. With both their frames crowded in alongside the monitor and table, the place felt almost stifling. He shifted uncomfortably, dismissing more pings and notifications as she finally looked up from her datapad. 

“Alright, you’re all checked in. I’ve sent a comm to the surgeon you’ll be working with today.” She smiled, again. It was starting to bug him. “Have you been made aware of the treatment you’ll be undergoing today?”

“No,” he grumbled, crossing his arms over his legs. “What is it?”

Ignoring his tone, she kept smiling and continued. “Are you familiar with mnemosurgery? Following your last encounter at the clinic, the doctor felt it would be best if an alternate approach was used to help you regain your memories. A specialist was called in from Cybertron, just for you.”

Luster cringed at that. All the way from Cybertron. Someone from home, or what home was supposed to be. Someone who’d remind him of how much he’d changed, how much home had changed. Was it anything like he remembered?

Mnemosurgery. It meant nothing to him. He frowned. 

“So he’s come all the way from Cybertron to do…something weird to me?” He vented. The drill on his back felt all the heavier. “Wonderful.”

The nurse was still smiling. Did she ever stop? Did she think it was reassuring? He felt like he was going to purge. 

“It’ll be fine, don’t worry. Mnemosurgery has been used plenty of times to help mechs struggling with trauma. The doctor wouldn’t have prescribed this if he thought it would be harmful to your health. And–”

A knock on the door interrupted her. Turning, she flipped the lock and it slid open, revealing a lavender mech with teal and yellow accents. He was wearing a silver visor and carrying a datapad, and gave the nurse a nod as he stepped in. “Luster of Cybertron, I take it?” He asked, silver gaze taking in the form of the pathetic creature sitting on the examination table. Upon receiving a nod, he grinned and held out a hand. “Good to meet you! I’m Redactor, and I’ll be serving as your mnemosurgeon.” 

His greeting was not returned. Unperturbed, Redactor dismissed the nurse, though he didn’t bother to sit where she had. Raising his datapad, he stood by the door as it closed, reviewing whatever information was on it. 

“So tell me about yourself, Luster!”

His voice was annoyingly cheerful. From the looks of his shoulderpads, tires, and the gaudy paint job, Luster guessed he was a race car. There were even rear wings on his back, split for each arm. His Autobot insignia was proudly displayed on his helm. 

“What’s there to tell? Everything you need to know is on that datapad.”

Redactor shrugged. “Sure, but as your mnemosurgeon, I’d like to potentially learn a bit more about you before I go digging around in your memories. It’s never pleasant to have a stranger in your thinker, is it?” He tapped his helm and let out a light chuckle.

Luster arched an optical ridge. “What do you mean by that?”

“Do you know what mnemosurgery is?” Redactor tilted his helm slightly, and when Luster shook his own, continued. “Mnemosurgery is the process of entering another Cybertronians mind. We…it doesn’t have a great reputation, I’ll be entirely realistic with you.” 

Despite the seriousness of the topic, he let out an awkward laugh. 

“You see it has a bit of a…connection, with the concepts of shadowplay and…well, during the war, it was frequently used to pry secrets from the processors of soldiers.” 

“But! Time marches on.” He gave Luster a smile that was supposed to be reassuring and failed to do just that. “You have my promise, I am not here to control you or alter your memories—I’m here to help you regain them. I heard you’ve been having memory problems?”

“That’s…one way of saying it.” He sat up, his back strut cracking as he did so. “I can’t remember anything, which I’m sure that datapad has already told you. So how are you going to fix that?”

Redactor raised one hand, needles suddenly springing from his fingers. Luster’s optics widened. Beneath his drill, something stirred, preparing to spring out defensively. 

“Relax! The process is painless!” The needles retracted and Redactor waved his hand placatingly. “According to your file, your memories are damaged, but it’s likely that they still exist, buried deep within your processor. You just can’t access them. That’s where I come in!” 

He gave his horrifying servos a wiggle. “With these, I can delve into your processor and potentially guide you back into those areas you can’t access. Now…granted, it may take several tries, and the process is quite dangerous to me. But…well, I can’t just turn down someone in need.”

“In need?” He was in need, all right, in need of not having needles jammed into his processor. He’d had the thing literally poked and prodded before, but this? Another ‘bot, literally inside of his head, accessing his memories? 

“Yes. Whatever happened to you out there, it’s destroyed quite a bit of your processor, hasn’t it? Don’t you want to remember any of it?”

When he didn’t answer, Redactor leaned forward, pressing even further. “Don’t you want to remember Cybertron? Your ship? Whatever you found out there? Solace?”

Solace. 

Don’t you want to remember Solace?

Solace. 

He felt like the ground was dropping from beneath his feet, flipping his tank out of his intake. Coughing, Luster felt warm Energon spill into his mouth, dripping out from his dermas. Redactor cringed at the sight.

“Are you alright?” He asked worriedly, though his words fell on deafening audials. 

Solace. 

Solace. 

Who’s Solace?

“If you’re not feeling well, I’ll call the nurse, we can do this another day–”

“Don’t.” The words spilled out of him along with the pearls of Energon, his optics focusing on the silver of Redactor’s visor. “Solace. You can help me remember Solace?.” 

There was an edge to his voice, a desperation that made Redactor flinch. 

“I–yes, that’s the hope. I–have you eaten this morning? The nurse said there was an incident–”

“I’m fine. Tell me. What are you going to do?” He leaned forward, almost losing his balance on the table. “What do those needles do? Are you going through my helm?”

“Oh, heavens no. They, ah, enter through the back of your neck, where I’ll connect with–”

“Don’t care. You said it doesn’t hurt?” 

“No, absolutely not. Completely painless, I assure you. Um, are you sure you’re feeling alright, you seem…well, friend, you’ve done a bit of an about face, haven’t you?”

He balled a fist and wiped Energon from his dermas. “Haven’t the faintest clue what you’re talking about. How long is this going to take?”

“The mnemosurgery? Anywhere from a few minutes to a few hours. I try to keep sessions short–the longer I’m in your mind, the greater the danger to me.”

Just a few hours at max. He could hold out for that long. With how slowly his tank drained anyways, he wouldn’t be anywhere close to empty even by the end of the earth day. A few hours. That was all. 

Solace. He had to find out what happened to Solace. This would let him find out what had happened to Solace. 

What happened to Solace?

“Alright. Poke me. Stab me. Whatever you’ve got to do. Let’s do this.”

Redactor winced. “It’s…good to see that you’re so…cooperative! Al-alright, please lie down.”

He did as instructed. Redactor loomed over him, needles poking out of his servos as he moved to his helm. 

“Now, please try to relax. Disable your optics if need be. The more stressed you are, the more difficult it can become for me to enter, and…”

Redactor was going on and on about the process. Luster did not care. He was too busy attempting to close every notification currently crowding his hub. 

Seek alternate fuel source.Seek alternate fuel source.Seek alternate fuel source.Seek alternate fuel source.Seek alternate fuel source.Seek alternate fuel source.Seek alternate fuel source.Seek alternate fuel source.Seek alternate fuel source.SEEK ALTERNATE FUEL SOURCE.SEEK ALTERNATE FUEL SOURCE.SEEK ALTERNATE FUEL SOURCE.SEEK ALTERNATE FUEL SOURCE.SEEK ALTERNATE FUEL SOURCE.SEEK ALTERNATE FUEL SOURCE.SEEK ALTERNATE FUEL SOURCE.SEEK ALTERNATE FUEL SOURCE.

A few hours. Just a few hours. That was all he had to hold on for. 

He could do this. 

[goodboyaudios]

Hiii miss me ya probably pissing you off now butttt I'll just put all the questions (which should be quick to answer If not sry) that have been on my mind here so I can leave u alone:)

1) what are the ages of the characters I motH

2) why does makkaro seemingly hate the guardian when their first introduced to eachother if he doesn't then u can ignore this question

3) linking to a old question u answered how would Raze(if/say she can), Gienne, makk (or mirin) act/ or what type of drunk are they?

4) In the second vid with Zed("on a date with shy wizard") the guardian put their forehead to Zeds(honestly reminded me of my foreign mother checking for me or my sister's temperature) obviously flustering him do to their intimacy BUT was he also flustered due to the fact his weak/soft spot is being touched gently on his face or head??

Anyways uhm I should sleep but I most likely won't if Ur awake, go to sleep naughty boy, and uhm sorry for bombarding you with these questions but rather have these all out so your not constantly answering my irrelevant questions, buh bi and gooooood night

Zed is 19, both Mirrin and the Guardian are over 300 years old, I think I put Makkaro at 29, but don't quote me on that, and that means Gienne is somewhere between 25-27. Frank is probably around the same as Makkaro.

He hates the Guardian, because she is real and the only one with influence, yet doesn't use it to help people who face constant injustice, much like himself and Gienne. From Raze' perspective, Makkaro represents everyone the Guardian has let down by never intervening. She is on trial in her eyes.

Raze at this point cannot get drunk. Before she was a star captain, probably a flirty drunk. Makkaro is probably a sleepy drunk and Gienne is maybe an over-sharer lol

Uhh, maybe? I didn't really think about weak spots, I just thought it would be cute!

[rin-and-jade]

Hi there. I've been questioning if I'm a system for months now and I feel like the information I find is so unhelpful sometimes, because it's all focused specifically on alters and if it's not about alters it's all syscourse nonsense, but the problem I have is that I have basically no communication...

A lot of the symptoms I'm experiencing are dissociation and memory related, and it all just makes me doubt my experiences a lot x(

Doesn't help that my psychiatrist keeps brushing off all my experiences as Anxiety and Psychosis/Schizophrenia???

I really just need some reassurance that I'm Not crazy.

So, do y'all know any good information resources that focus on things Outside of alters?? Or at the least cover all aspects and don't exclusively focus on alters? Anything to do with improving communication would also be appreciated.

Maybe the communication isn't great because I'm still living in an unsafe household? I really don't know, it's been getting worse for a while now, I've been noticing a lot of times where I find belongings, things I said, or anything like that and Having no memory of doing or saying any of it. And it's been giving red flags to me.

Sorry for the long winded ask, much love, thank you in advance. // 💜🌹

My blog is not syscourse aligned, rather, it is education and awareness aligned. Im sorry that you couldn't find your answers, that must be frustrating,, though im here with what you're searching for!

Alters are a byproduct of our dissociative barriers, i previously had made an awareness post to remind them that DID, is not only an alter problem too.

I find a lot of psychologists or psychiatrists horrible and condescending, where many of my friends who got into therapy also got treated negatively too. In my country, neither of the psychologists im friends with even know of DID, thus affirming that there's still a long way to spread education regarding about CDD. Which i have been doing for 3 years, for the community to learn and progress.

So basically, i don't think you're crazy for having people who would dismissing your symptoms, or have memory and dissociation related issues for now.

Please check my blog, there are many types of information outside of alters! You might find some posts helpful.

--

Q: "Maybe the communication isn't great because I'm still living in an unsafe household?"

A: That's correct, our brain has a very complex code, a predictive machine, to crank up or shut down processes (such as mind wandering). If the place is unsafe, your brain prioritizes survival and making it out of there first and foremost, creativity and problem solving might suffer due to the main focus of surviving.

It's like how stress creates difference in blood flow to prioritize the lungs, heart, and other important organs but not to your digestion track. Who says that cannot happen inside the brain either?

Q: "Anything to do with improving communication would also be appreciated."

A: There are many ways, but sense of safety comes first, its like when you are dysregulated and is trying to heal,, your brain keeps out putting the wrong prediction and answers because it is still thinking and seeing in grey-tinted glasses. Regulation comes first, or safety comes first,, these two always create a feedback loop that will help your brain think more clear and less tint-affected!

To end this ask, i will link my posts regarding to: - Front Stuck - Inner Communication

My DMs are open for further 1-on-1 help.

- j

[skibasyndrome]

Hey Simon 💜,

1, 2,4, 36, 39, 41, 46 and 47 for the fanfic ask :)

Hope you have a lovely weekend!!

Hi Sophia 🥰 Thanks so much for sending in an ask! I'll try my best to reply with the tiny catalog of read fics I have available haha.

favorite fanfic of all time

I cannot possibly answer something as... final as this lmao. I'll just name my recent faves again (sorry for tagging you guys again):

The most beautiful boy by thelovelysarcastic (not on tumblr? idk?)

Treasures and Treachery by itsme_hi_imtheproblem/@iwouldnevergetintofanfic

Ivy by unfortunate17/@unfortunate17

2. favorite writer of the fandom

You see... now I have a very similar problem, lmao. Toooo many amazingly talented people whose writing I am obsessed with, to possibly decide, but I'll give a few definite faves:

@earlgrey-lateatnight (RubyIntyale), @ungaroyals (embracedthevoid), @unfortunate17, @darktwistedgenderplural, @iwouldnevergetintofanfic (itsme_hi_imtheproblem), @stretchoutfics (strechoutandwait), ... (and I'm sure I'm already forgetting people and fics arghhh)

4. the fanfic you would recommande for somebody not in the fandom

Honestly? All of my favorites.

But I actually did send a link to you can stay by origamifrogs/@princewillesothermom to my bf @alkalinetrios yesterday because I was like "I don't care that you're not involved, you HAVE to read this". (it's beautiful and heart-wrenching and a masterpiece)

36.   your favorite trope

So if we're learning one thing here today, it's that I am highly indecisive. God, I love so many tropes. I think it'd be easier to ask which tropes I don't like, I guess?

But I definitely love a good slow-burn, a good friends-to-lovers or enemies-to-lovers or strangers-to-whatever-to-lovers with everyone suffering from being painfully in love. I guess I just very much love reading about them falling in love and being dumb about not noticing that it's mutual lol. Yeah I think that's it, something like mutual, very lovesick pining.

39. a trope you would like to see (more) in the fandom

Oh idk, I don't think I have enough of an overview to really say something I missing, but as a never-fully-recovered former emo kid I'd love to see some more of the stuff the MCR fandom had for example, like idk... vampires obviously, but also ghost stuff or like tragic angsty historical fics or idk. I guess just some dark stuff? For funsies lol.

41. How do you choose the fic you read

Firstly it's gotta be Wilmon-centric, then I look at the word count, and compare that to how much time I have lol, then I read the summary and idk? I guess either the writing style needs to catch me immediately or it needs to be some original premise. Or a retelling of one of my favorite scenes, that also catches me lol. So I guess I just base what I want to read on the summary. Oh, or a trusted mutual/friend recommends it!

46. did you stay awake up to an veeeery unreasonable hour to finish a fanfic

Yeeeeeeep, very much do that, probably too often. Sometimes my eyes will be falling shut, but I tell myself I gotta push through, there's only x chapters left lol

47. WIP or not WIP

Yes WIP!!!! I love WIPs for soooo many reasons, most of all because it's such a fun journey and because the waiting just kind of heightens the excitement for the next chapter!

Send me a fanfic ask

[shimmeringweeds]

EDIT: so like. all of this was wrong. and I don't know what I was on when writing this. Tired is what I was. Read it just to laugh at how dumb I was being.

Link Click S2 E10 part 3 (part 1) (part 2)

Destiny and Fate

Let's go back to this scene for a moment:

We've already concluded that this episode is a dramatization of events, a theater play. Events in this episode are symbolic not literal.

Recap: Cheng Xiaoshi and Li Tianxi are symbolically crossing paths here, not literally. After all, by the point CSX!LG is at this crossroads, Li Tianxi has already been in police custody, unidentified, for two days. Li Tianxi's half likely takes place the night she ran away, after Chen Bin's death.

So what's the symbolism? In regards to theater, it could be a couple of things.

1). When two characters cross paths in theater, it can represent two solutions to a problem posed. Sometimes, there's only one right answer and the viewer has to discern, which is it? There is more to this than meets the eye. - I'll come back to that at the very end.

2). Two characters crossing paths can also symbolize a swapping of fate. In the context of Link Click, this one is the obvious choice so let's go.

Li Tianxi's fate is not a happy one. She's traumatized and her mental growth is stunted. It doesn't appear she can take care of herself. She can only rely on her brother. And Li Tianchen (brilliant mad lad that he is) is still only in the process of becoming a real hunter, and not just Qian Jin's hunting tool. He hasn't broken free of that yet (though the extent that LTC also is using QJ as a tool by this point is worth noting. QJ probably knows he needs to watch out, with those gloves.)

Li Tianchen wants to rewrite destiny and "find" his sister.

Li Tianchen wants to rewrite destiny so he doesn't loose his sister in the first place.

I'm not talking about that night she ran away. Remember this is figurative. Li Tianchen started loosing Li Tianxi the moment he started loosing himself. Li Tianchen lost Li Tianxi the first night he impulsively chose to murder through her.

Li Tianxi and Cheng Xiaoshi figuratively cross paths in "inevitable destiny."

Whether by free will or by force, it's implied that Cheng Xiaoshi will take on an inevitable destiny for Li Tianxi. The key nodes of the past cannot be changed, but there are multiple ways to cause them.

______________________________________________________________

Intermission : Li Tianchen

I've got a bone to pick with you.

"Without photos, you have no chance to cheat now."

LI TIANCHEN. WHAT? I'm sorry, are you for real? I thought you understood how these games go???? So your telling me, That Cheng Xiaoshi using photographs, using his own damn ability, is cheating. But that you're allowed to possess people? KID. How does that logic track?

Is it just because Cheng Xiaoshi can physically disappear? Does he consider that a cowardly hunt? I mean, honestly, no matter how you look at it, from a game POV Cheng Xiaoshi won this round fair and square. Li Tianchen was outsmarted. If anything, having Xiao Ma stationed as backup is cheating, but that's a Qian Jin problem. It's out of Li Tianchen's control.

I need to mull this one over more, why is using the photo ability cheating? What a curve ball.

But what we do get out of this is: Li Tianchen didn't realize the full extent of what Cheng Xiaoshi could do. What else doesn't he know?

______________________________________________________________

Lu Guang

Li Tianchen has been.... somewhat dismissive of Lu Guang the entire season. I mean, he meets Lu Guang and immediately thinks, "yeah, this guy is a disposable resource, let's stab him." And then a night or two later he's like, "Oh yeah. BTW. Here's a photograph. Please deliver." (because I still can't think of reality where that photograph wasn't a card he played.)

In eps 8&10 Li Tianchen says, "I regret being too lenient before.."

Wow, that's a threat. So you did mean to kill him back then,or--?

Li Tianchen wants to know how in the ever-loving world did Lu Guang know about the damn boat. No one knew about the boat. Even Li Tianchen might not have known about the boat (QJ set up multiple escape routes.)

So HOW? How did this nobody on bed rest know about the damn boat?

There is a dark spot on our timeline. A few dark spots, actually:

Dark Spot 1). Li Tianxi's escape. We see her run away. We see Tianchen chase after her. That's all.

Dark Spot 2). Cheng Xiaoshi/Lu Guang getting to the boat. How did either of them know where to go?

Dark Spot 3) The murders of Liu Lan/Li Fan and Chen Bin.

Dark Spot 5). Lu Guang's visit from a twin. (or that's just me)

What are we missing? Why have we not been shown these specific details? What is the link?

Crazy theory 1: Li Tianxi

Li Tianxi has had her ability abused. Possibly, it was abused before she even knew what it was. What if needing to use a photo is a safeguard? What if Li Tianxi can but doesn't actually need to use a photo in order to see a person? What if she can run a mental check up on anyone she's recently met... or touched?

If we don't know the full extent of Li Tianxi's power. Then maybe she and Cheng Xiaoshi could work together.

Li Tianxi can see memories, yes? Maybe they don't need a photograph of that time, maybe they just need the memory.

Not sure yet how that plays into the above scenarios but, it's a thought.

Crazy theory 2: Future Cheng Xiaoshi and the consequence of his actions.

Crazy theory 3: Future CXS/LG combo and the dual consequences of both their actions.

Crazy theory 4: "Hat Man" as the physical embodiment of the consequences of everyone's actions.

Well, that started okay and now we're ..... well, we're somewhere. I'm tired.

[immortalbutterflycos]

For the WIP ask game:

💾What is your document of your wip/ a wip called? (not the stories actual title but what you’ve saved it as)

And:

❤️❤️❤️

Good morning~ (it's 8 am here when I'm writing this) I meant for this to be my first post of the day, but while trying to find the information I have, I found out that the summary section of Google Docs was deleted along with all of my "summaries" (which are, because my brain simply cannot function on a "normal" level, actually extensive plot notes that I now lost forever. Which is super cool~ ^.^ <3 Just another reason why I prefer to write on paper I guess...

Anyway, sorry about that, I'm not in a super fantastic mood rn.

BUT! To answer your question, unfortunately, I don't have an extremely fun one for this for the main fic that I've been working on. But that is primarily because I literally have -and I'm not kidding because I went back and counted them all- Ninety-nine docs relevant to this fic and I'm about to start on #100 because I just thought of a new plot point yesterday (that I thankfully wrote on paper since I was at work) and I need to give it a home.😂

And that is JUST for 'The Art of Running for Our Lives' (aka TAoRfOL since writing that title out every time is exhausting 😂)

I had to make a whole-ass Masterlist of docs with their links so that I could keep track of them and all of the titles are more spoilery than anything so that I know that what information I need to find will be in that doc before I click on it.

I started writing this fic in March, 2023 and I wish that I could tell you that this was all simple overkill, but I wish it was. It's not even posted yet but this plot has a grand total of 8 main characters and the AU I'm doing is so niche that I'm trying to merge magic systems (to an extent) and keeping track of timelines is wild in this one even without my ADHD getting in the way of things.

I'd say I do this because I hate myself, but this is very much a passion project and I really just want to do it the justice it deserves. 💜

That being said, I do have a few doc titles I'm willing to share because I think they're silly (I know, it took a WHILE to get here. Have I mentioned that I have really bad unregulated ADHD? 😂)

"TAoRfOL Cheat Sheet: [insert character name here]"

"James isn't doing well (TAoRfOL)"

"Post-[redacted] Dorlene Heist"

"I was in my feels..."

✨Bonus from other AU's:✨

"The cat distribution system but the cat is Regulus"

and finally,

"this was supposed to be smut how did I get here..?"

TL;DR: I have ADHD so there is no 1 specific doc for my fic. And also because I apparently need to dip my toes in every pond I find, (write too many fics/AUs at once), most of my docs are titled "[blank] AU" with a small description of the contents in the title.

Also apparently I can't give a simple answer to any of these ask games. Hope this is okay because I have no self-control and I'm very passionate about this fic.

[etaindelaserna]

Hi, so as Dramione shipper have you ever ship Drarry? Now, I don't mean any negative thing like "this ship ia better ans you're wrong because" or "how can you ship this when that....."

See, when I was younger, I already like shipping characters from what I watch or read and all of them are m/f ships. As I grow older and consume more media, made me realized that I love m/m & f/f ships way more than m/f ships. And now, most of my otps (85% of them) are m/m and f/f. Sorry is it weird?

But somehow I can't unship m/f that I used to love. One of my moot asked me, why did I love dramione and not drarry when most of my fav ships are m/m. And I can't answer them, that m/f ships that are dear to me, I can't see them as m/m or f/f. What do you think?

Hey, no worries! I didn't think anything of the question.

Drarry actually does make sense given that Draco and Harry share similar dynamics, tensions and story building questions as Draco and Hermione do. But I've never shipped them. Not even tried.

I have two thoughts on this since I do feel mostly the same as you do but never thought about it before: if the m/f shipping in a certain fandom developed when I was a teenager, then I stayed with that ship and didn't start to suddenly ship m/m or f/f, even though I had started to like more m/m or f/f ships when I was in my early twenties. I'm still more into the f/m than I'm into m/m or f/f ships but every now and then they jump on me and most of the time it is because the characters and their chemestry together just makes sense. They're just meant to be. But it's also the same with m/m and f/f ships: if I liked them back then, then I'm still into them now. And no it's not weird that you are now more into the m/m and f/f ships: I think, our taste, or let's say, what we need from our ships develops alongside our life experiences -- both with media and reality. What we want from ships is allowed to change or stay the same depending on our needs. I don't know if or how unshipping really is a thing that can happen because it never happened to me. Sounds brutal. I could never abandon my OGs.

(1) Probably due to nostalgia. I don't know about you but I have fond memories of reading Dramione fanfics from dusk till dawn, basically satisfying the "What if"-impulse set by certain canon moments in the book and especially in the movies. Also Tom and Emma's crazy chemistry contributed a lot to cement Dramione as my old time favourite ship. I don't know if I had started shipping them as much as I did if the movies had never happened. Drarry is just not as appealing to me as Dramione. I can't see Draco with another man or Hermione with another girl. I can't explain it any better than that for me their characters just don't feel coded in that way. Same with Harry.

(2) I don't think the shipping process is a conscious desicion. Sometimes we just look at two characters and we feel a spark (because they look nice together or they banter like an old married couple or because they are two sides of the same coin) and that's it. But it seems to be linked to what we needed or wanted during the time when we encountered that particular fandom for the first time and then it just became a part of how we engaged with the story. A habit hard to shake. Maybe it also depends on with what expectations we approached the story.

I don't think I can give you a definitive answer as to why it is like that. Maybe it's all of what I've just said or none of it. I do think that in our head we've shaped the story and how we feel about it in a particular way and now it's very hard to shake that perspective. Might have been different if I had read Harry Potter as an adult instead of growing up with it.

The most important rule about shipping is that no one can tell you what you can or cannot ship. If Drarry isn't doing it for you although you like m/m ships then that doesn't negate your other m/m ships and it certainly doesn't make you a hypocrite. Just because I like m/f doesn't mean I'm going to like it in every story in the whole solar system.

I'm ranting. I hope I could give you somewhat help or ideas.

[askew-d]

Do you mind if I ask your top 10 favorite characters (can be male or female) from all of the media that you loved (can be anime/manga, books, movies or tv series)? And why do you love them? Sorry if you've answered this question before.....Thanks...

hello, there! thank you for following me, by the way. this ask’s a sweet surprise! i don’t mind at all, i’ve never answered this before :) i’ll make a list of all the characters i cherish. it’s not ranked over who i cherish more though (they’re all special for me). they’re all random nonetheless, but let’s see if you can catch a little bit of a ‘type’ here, haha.

1. kageyama tobio, from haikyuu!! — i first found him to be a very bothersome character in terms of background and personality. perhaps a little bit aggressive, unnecessarily so. however, i can see how much he’s changed after finding a team like karasuno and hinata especially, and over time we go unraveling his attitude to find an actually sweet person who probably only thinks about milk, cats, leaving his nails neat and other stupid things. he’s one of those tsundere characters and that’s nice. he’s overall a nice person who’s judged unfairly. and his awkwardness turns out to be adorable, so that’s a plus.

2. minato, from the film kaibutsu — this japanese show absolutely wrecked me. it seriously did. how the hell could they expect me to move on after it? i have no words for how much this story impacted me. this main character brings such a tender feeling of youth and fragile love towards another person that sweeps me off my feet. he’s got a repressed heart that slowly comes free and it made me feel very protective over him.

3. violet, from the anime violet evergarden — heartfelt letters aside, this anime felt to me like a coming of age show. or perhaps more like a coming of ‘human’. i love her because she’s truly intrigued about the world, the people, feelings as a whole and what it means to be a breathing creature. she’s just a child. she wants to see everything. to understand her heart. she’s a force of nature that beholds so much and doesn’t even know how to put into proper words, even if that’s her job.

4. lu guang, from shiguang daili ren —i just watched link click recently, but this boy surely made a way into my heart. i love how he’s ready to fight the world on behalf of cheng xiaoshi, and although he’s a hypocrite through and through, he’s real. he’s one of the realest people i’ve seen being portrayed. because who in heavens would choose someone unimportant to tou if you can choose someone you love? and how he hides his emotions? chef’s kiss. i love that he’s an ‘actions speak louder than words’ kind of guy; he’d call you an idiot in one moment, then burn the world for you in the following one.

5. the little prince, from the book the little prince — i cannot forget this book not even in a million years. changed me as a person. this vulnerable, free character makes me think he’s not just a hallucination from the author, he’s a magical shiny little person who’s discovering about life. i love him because he’d never change, you can’t change him, because he’ll always be a child at heart and mind. he’s everyone. he’s you, he’s me, he’s who we were. and that breaks me apart. he makes me cry, this one. he makes me remember that i’m a child too, regardless of how many time passes.

6. léon doré, from the film it’s not me, i swear! — i was a fifteen-year old watching this after having reconnected with my mother and that’s why it marvelled me. it’s a lot of what i’ve been through, of what i’ve been. i love him because i relate to him, and i wish i could’ve had that courage. i won’t spoil the story, but i really recommend it! my favorite film of all time. it has trigger warning for child abandonment, suicide attempts and child abuse though.

7. wei wuxian, from mo dao zu shi — oh, boy, i can’t relate to this one at all. i think he’s the only one from this list that doesn’t fall into the ‘introvert with hidden feelings and traumatised past’ type, not entirely. he only falls into the traumatised past. i think he’s the only extrovert character — besides hinata shouyou — that i actually like. i’m an introvert at heart, so at first he annoyed me too, lan wangji, i get you. but his strength? how he looks into the world that broke him and says ‘i’ll keep trying, i’ll keep smiling’? how he loves to the point of sacrifying himself? how he’s not attuned to his feelings because he’s more worried about being excited over little things? how he’s just overall so rebellious, but intelligent, sincere, witty, and does this all for the good, regardless if he’s being misjudged? how he’s been through hell but chooses to find reasons to keep going instead of looking back? oh, how i love him.

8. todoroki shouto, from my hero academia — i don’t enjoy boku no hero anymore, it has lost the entertaining bits for me. but i do expect the best for this boy right here, i love him for his cool nature, how he walks into life trying to let go of his resentment (after he befriends midoriya), and how he cares for his friends more than words can be let out to express. i wish the anime had grew to be better so i could watch more of him, but the feeling’s gone for me now. nevertheless, i still cherish him.

9. gin, from hotarubi no mori e — he’s a mystery, that’s for sure. he deserved so much more. he deserved life, he deserved a chance to live. i love the tenderness in him, and the sheer tenderness he showed our main character even if he didn’t even managed to be a real, normal boy! how can beings find the love in themselves and be so painfully alive even if they’re not in fact in the human spectrum? i love that he taught us this concept of love. i love this type of trope. i love and hate it at the same time.

10. dr. house, from house m.d — i had a hard time wondering if i should indeed add him here. because he’s an asshole. why do i like him? i don’t know. i see this flawed, asshole man and i see the pain in him and though it doesn’t justify anything at all, it’s what humans are all about. he judges everyone. he shames everyone. he shows people’s true intentions. he hides his true intentions. he’s repressed and lonely and he’s doomed. but he’s got this relationship with wilson, and women, and monster trucks games, and he lives. and he’s an awful man, but aren’t we all at core? i love to hate him.

bonus: nozomi fujisaki, from cherry magic, and nano, from girl from nowhere. they’re wonderful. they’re everything. love fujisaki’s view in life (it matches mine) and nano’s brilliance ✨

haha, well, this got longer than i thought, but wow, i enjoyed this a lot. thank you for asking me this, really! big hugs!!

[wrencatte]

ask game! 1, 11, 56, 77 (majesty of caged lions)

1.Do you prefer writing one-shots or multi-chaptered fics?

One-shots but I cravveeee the ability to write AND post multi-chaptered fics. But yeah, it's one shots

11. Link your three favorite fics right now

Oh gosh, it's gonna be all star wars fics I hope you know???!?!

Star Wars: Aberration - a series, not a single fic. An AU at the end of Fallen Order of "what if Cal Fell? and Darth Vadar took a special liking to him?" with a mix of a lot of other Star Wars media like Rebels and such. I would not recommend it for people who like happy things. This isn't not a happy series, but it's fun and good. I've read it multiple times and am eagerly awaiting an update.

Unsettled / Disillusioned - only one fic in the series right now. I'm in love with how they wrote Post-Survivor Koboh and the Raiders...which is a very minor point the fic in the long run. It's Merrical and I just really love the outsider POV of this Cal. It's so good. Crossovered with Rebels

And to completely throw people through the loop: a Pacific Rim story

Aurora Borealis - A canon-compliant fic leading up to and during the Golden Age of the jaeger program. Yancy and Raleigh's time during the academy and beyond. I re-read this fic a lot.

56. What’s something about your writing that you pride yourself on?

If you'd asked me this when I was (cough)sober(cough) I would've had an answer for you! But as of right now I cannot for the life of me figure out an answer to this! Maybe someone can chime in and give me suggestions, but right now I'm at a loss lmao sorry

77. Do you have a favorite scene you’ve written from [Fanfic Name] story/chapter? 

(majesty of caged lions)

The reveeeealll is always a good one!!!

“You – ,” he whispers, shivery and soft in the way ghosts are – and, no, no, that’s not. He’s not. His hand uncurls, cups the side of his face – it’s a familiar motion. Father likes to do it. Richard mimics him. It is yet another thing Jason picked up from them – and Damian leans into it despite the wet warmth, his lashes fluttering, clumping as tears well up. “You made – it.” The corners of his eyes crinkle like he’s smiling. “G-Good. Robin.” “It was like you told me.” He covers Jason’s cold hand with his own. “Exactly like you told me. You were supposed to come back.” Jason laughs brokenly and chokes on it, a gurgle in the back of his throat. Bruce hooks a finger over his mask, rips it off quickly in time for him to tip over and for blood to pool out of his mouth, stringing from his lips. His hand slips from Damian’s face, leaving behind ghoulish streaks of red. Bruce freezes where he sits, lips parting in surprise, as Jason wheezes through his next breath, blood speckling his chin and the ground as his lungs fill with blood.

thank you for the ask!!! <3

[softpine]

@bb-enablefreebuild LITERALLYYYYYYY i even have this exact image saved in my asa & finn web weaving folder jfksjds it's so them, even the hands 😭

@forgotten-pixels oh yeah he definitely has a wikipedia page!! his first single was a pretty big hit and even though his other work hasn't been as mainstream, he's contributed to a bunch of other artists' work so he's still well known in certain circles. i also think he's JUST famous enough to get those weird AI generated articles written about him, like "remember the guy who sang [song title from 15 years ago]? this is him now!!" because he's not well known enough for people to realize it's false / clickbait lmao. (btw you never have to apologize for asking questions!! i love them at any time 🥺)

asa has a regular phone but he may as well not have one at all because he quite literally never charges it or brings it anywhere fjkjsds stevie is the one who's always switching out her phone case & never gets around to putting a screen protector on so her screen is definitely cracked, i think elaine probably loses her phone the most on accident, and jada will say she lost her phone even when it's ringing in her hand because she just doesn't want to answer. if we still had texting limits stevie would use that shit up in half an hour, if that!!

his intentions were good...... his execution however..... leaves a lot to be desired

i'm so sorry my brain cannot even think about april fools right now without the dan and phil brainrot fully taking over 😭😭😭 no other pranks exist in my brain at the moment i can't even think of any sjksjd i could definitely see mikaela & danny pranking each other though

HELPPP this is so funny but i'm gonna have to say casper, there is no way he knows what that is

thank you for the idea!! i'm trying to avoid sending people a patreon link for written work; even if it's free (and it would be), there's still a connotation that it would cost money and i'm afraid no one would even click the link to read it (plus i've already used my patreon for cc so i'm afraid i would annoy the people who followed me for that content). ughhhh but thank you for trying :(

i'm really bummed about substack because it looked like the easiest way to accomplish what i want to accomplish but i'm sure i'll find something eventually. thanks for the interest 🥺

i would love to, but tumblr has a 30 pic limit and also i need to cut myself off at some point because otherwise i could literally spend months on 1 single post lmao 😭

you were right :P :P

i forgot about that too!! iirc wasn't it just dependent on the number of sims you have & their ages? asa bounces between caroline's and danny's houses so he would change the difficulty, but the mayfields would always have the highest rating because they also have sadie & the farm animals to take care of!

yes definitely!! just please credit the original mesh creator if applicable (i always list them) 💝

i forgot to answer this when you sent it, but i did read it right away and it made me smile, so thank you 💖💖

it really is the most attractive trait a person can have to me fjkjsds did you ever hear from that guy btw?? 💕

THANK YOUUU kisses you back one thousand times 💖💖💖

@minamill ILYYY 💞

@morrigan-sims thank you!!!! 🥺