#sorry but... Why...
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x-poprocks-x · 24 days ago
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everybody say happy sweet 16 slenderman
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beastwhimsy · 7 months ago
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a project I finally got around to finishing!! the mane 6, inspired by their earlier generation counterparts, within a medieval fantasy style setting. please don't repost without permission! you just need to ask.
some fun facts:
fluttershy is half unicorn here!! that's why she has the deer-like build and slightly long tail.
rarity is half horse
applejack is fully just a horse.
pinkie and rainbow are the only true ponies
their jobs (in the order shown in the lineup) are royal messenger, royal jester, royal menagerie keeper, royal tailor, royal orchard farmer and Queen Celestia's Most Specialest Student.
in this au, they all met due to working within the castle grounds.
in this au, celestia is queen, luna is still banished, and twilight is discouraged from making friends as it distracts her from her studies. she is celestia's heir and grew up in the castle.
they are all marekissers. lol. also rarity is transfem and rainbow is bigender.
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arcanefanpage · 7 months ago
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SHE’S ALIVE!! I WILL DIE ON THIS HILL! THE AIRSHIP AT THE END!!! THE GLITCHY END CREDITS!! THE AIR VENTS!!! THE GLITCH! CAITLYN’S SMIRK AT THE END!!!
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andstuffsketches · 29 days ago
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they're a fun trio
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frownyalfred · 4 months ago
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Okay, another little lesson for fic writers since I see it come up sometimes in fics: wine in restaurants.
When you buy a bottle of wine in a (nicer) restaurant, generally (please note my emphasis there, this is a generalization for most restaurants, but not all restaurants, especially non-US ones) you may see a waiter do a few things when they bring you the bottle.
The waiter presents the bottle to the person who ordered it
The waiter uncorks the bottle in order to serve it
The waiter hands the cork to the person who ordered the bottle
The waiter pours a small portion of the wine (barely a splash) and waits for the person who ordered it to taste it
The waiter then pours glasses for everyone else at the table, and then returns to fill up the initial taster's glass
Now, you might be thinking -- that's all pretty obvious, right? They're bringing you what you ordered, making sure you liked it, and then pouring it for the group. Wrong. It's actually a little bit more complicated than that.
The waiter presents the bottle to the person who ordered it so that they can inspect the label and vintage and make sure it's the bottle they actually ordered off the menu
The waiter uncorks the bottle so that the table can see it was unopened before this moment (i.e., not another wine they poured into an empty bottle) and well-sealed
The waiter hands the cork to the person who ordered the bottle so that they can inspect the label on the cork and determine if it matches up; they can also smell/feel the cork to see if there is any dergradation or mold that might impact the wine itself
The waiter pours a small portion for the person who ordered to taste NOT to see if they liked it -- that's a common misconception. Yes, sometimes when house wine is served by the glass, waiters will pour a portion for people to taste and agree to. But when you order a bottle, the taste isn't for approval -- you've already bought the bottle at this point! You don't get to refuse it if you don't like it. Rather, the tasting is to determine if the wine is "corked", a term that refers to when a wine is contaminated by TCA, a chemical compound that causes a specific taste/flavor. TCA can be caused by mold in corks, and is one of the only reasons you can (generally) refuse a bottle of wine you have already purchased. Most people can taste or smell TCA if they are trained for it; other people might drink the wine for a few minutes before noticing a damp, basement-like smell on the aftertaste. Once you've tasted it, you'll remember it. That first sip is your opportunity to take one for the table and save them from a possibly corked bottle of wine, which is absolutely no fun.
If you've sipped the wine (I generally smell it, I've found it's easier to smell than taste) and determined that it is safe, you then nod to your waiter. The waiter will then pour glasses for everyone else at the table. If the wine is corked, you would refuse the bottle and ask the waiter for a new bottle. If there is no new bottle, you'll either get a refund or they'll ask you to choose another option on their wine list. A good restaurant will understand that corked bottles happen randomly, and will leap at the opportunity to replace it; a bad restaurant or a restaurant with poor training will sometimes try to argue with you about whether or not it's corked. Again, it can be a subtle, subjective taste, so proceed carefully.
In restaurants, this process can happen very quickly! It's elegant and practiced. The waiter will generally uncork the bottle without setting the bottle down or bracing it against themselves. They will remove the cork without breaking it, and they will pour the wine without dripping it down the label or on the table.
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allagashed · 1 year ago
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whenever i say “screaming crying throwing up” this is what i mean
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blakbonnet · 6 months ago
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as i grow older and age in fandom especially, i have waning patience for 2012 style fandom wars. i don't have time for the type of person who goes "why is this the 2nd top ship on ao3 when it bugs me", i don't have the energy to be friends with people who go "i specifically expressed dislike for this ship and people still write it?" and i have absolutely no time for someone who goes "this very personal trauma i have projected onto this random character and ship should be recognized and agreed by everyone else, otherwise they're bad people"
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daftmooncretin · 1 year ago
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spock’s room decor is actually fucking bonkers. The weapons??? the big red velvet curtain??? like ok phantom of the opera go crazy.
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for reference jim’s room has some photos and a plant so we can surmise this is uniquely a spock being a dramatic weirdo thing
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crowberri · 10 days ago
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The gang with shadowcrystal boss equips + kris doodles bc i love kris
JevilsTail on susie is literally just her tail but grown out by clown magic; PuppetScarf has 2 hand-claws that move constantly in very unnatural optics (think 3d tenna in 2d pixel game) which susie finds creepy.
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^ someone on twt commented how kris would flirt with the dealmaker like this and i instantly had the vision so clear in my head my hand almost moved on its own
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cuntphoric · 1 month ago
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you’ve been skipping class, flunking labs, and now you’re in his office with a bad throbbing ache between your legs and an even badder grade
you don’t even bother knocking when you walk into his office, because he’s the one who told you to “come in after hours if you want to fix this."
he’s lounging behind his desk like he always is, legs spread wide, shirt unbuttoned just enough to show a sliver of his chest. those ridiculous black sunglasses are perched low on his nose, and when he sees you he smiles.
“look who finally showed up,” he sighed, gesturing lazily to the stack of unfinished lab reports on his desk. “thought you’d given up.”
you shift awkwardly, heart pounding that you swore that felt like . “i just.. didn’t know what to say.”
“good thing you’re not here to talk, then,” he murmurs, pushing his glasses back up. “you’ve been slacking all semester. skipping lectures, half assing labs.. think i wouldn’t notice?”
you try to look apologetic, but it’s hard to think when he stands up and walks toward you, all tall, slow, and hot as hell. he stops when he’s just behind you, so close you can feel the heat of him against your back.
he stops just behind you. doesn’t touch. doesn’t even breathe too loud. but he’s there. close enough to set your skin on fire.
“so,” he says, voice lower now, almost lazy. “what are you gonna do to make up for it?”
you swallow hard. it’s too quiet in the room, and his words feel like a trap you’re already tangled in. “i don’t know,” you mumble, not trusting yourself to meet his eyes. “whatever you think is fair..”
he lets that hang for a second. then laughs softly. “you’re asking me to decide what’s fair?” his breath brushes your neck now, and you feel it—finally, his fingers ghosting over your hip like he’s testing how far you’ll let him go. “baby, that’s dangerous.”
you say nothing. can’t. your pulse is screaming under your skin.
he leans closer, like he’s about to bite out something cruel, but he doesn’t. just murmurs, “you walk in here after weeks of disappearing and tell me whatever i think is fair? you sure you wanna give me that kind of control?”
“i’m here, aren’t i?” you whisper.
his hand finally settles on your waist, grounding, a little too firm. “yeah,” he says. “you are.”
but he doesn’t move. doesn’t do anything, not yet. just lets the tension stretch and snap in the silence, dragging it out because he wants you to squirm.
“bend over the desk,” he says quieter now, “just so we can talk.”
you hesitate this time. you know what he’s capable of when you’re like this - open, stupid with need, desperate for something rough to erase the guilt of failing repeatedly pooling in your chest. but still, you lean forward, hands braced, chest against the desk’s cold edge.
he stands behind you but doesn’t touch. just talks.
“do you even know what you want?” he asks, tone unreadable. “or are you just hoping i’ll figure it out for you?”
your mouth is dry. “i want to fix it.”
he hums. “no, you want to get fucked and pretend that fixes it.”
your breath catches.
“you think showing up wet and pathetic is the same as putting in work?” he presses a hand between your shoulder blades, not to hold you down, but just feel you. “you think that’s gonna cut it?” he sighs.
can this man just do something—
oh. and then—then—you hear the belt.
you don’t hesitate. your hands brace against the cool wood as you feel him behind you, tugging at your waistband, baring you like you’re some toy he gets to play with when the lab’s closed.
and then you hear it. the soft click of his belt.
“count for me,” he says.
the first strike is loud and hot and sharp, making your hips jerk forward and your breath catch in your throat.
“one,” you gasp.
“you can take more than that, right?” he murmurs, and god, he sounds pleased.
he spanks you again, then again, harsh and slow, pausing just enough to let the sting settle before the next. by the seventh you’re trembling, thighs pressed tight, skin burning.
by the twelfth you’re dripping, trying not to grind against the desk to get some- any kind of friction. he leans forward, pressing a kiss just under your ear, voice thick.
“look at you,” he breathes. “all shaky already. i haven’t even fucked you yet.”
when he finally pulls his cock out, he drags the tip along your slit just to pull a reaction out of you and then he pushes in, all at once, no warning, making your body jolt forward as he buries himself deep.
he fucks you like he’s trying to drill the periodic table into your spine—slow at first, grinding deep, then picking up pace until the desk creaks under you. one hand tangled in your hair, the other gripping your hip, dragging you back onto him like he owns you.
“gonna fix that grade right here,” he pants. “maybe if i fuck you dumb enough, you’ll stop skipping class.”
you’re crying out now, clenching around him, brain static.
“f-fuck—professor—”
he groans, hips stuttering as he slams into you harder, until your legs give and your moans turn into needy whines. and when he comes, it’s with a low growl and a handful of your hair in his fist, cock buried so deep it feels like he’s made a mark inside.
you stay there, folded over the desk, skin warm and used, every nerve fried and twitching. the world’s gone fuzzy around the edges, and your thighs are trembling, stuck between the aftershock and the hot cum inside.
he slides out antagonizingly slow. his hands stay on your hips a second longer than they need to, thumbs brushing over the marks he left. then he leans in, and you feel the scratch of his stubble as he kisses the base of your spine—soft and mocking.
his voice is a low purr when he speaks.
“look at you,” he murmurs. “can’t even stand up straight.”
you groan, forehead still pressed to the desk, too gone to argue.
he pulls your panties back up with a tenderness that doesn’t match anything that just happened, then palms your ass one last time that felt too smug.
“extra credit approved,” he says, and when you glance back, he’s buttoning his shirt as if he didn’t just rearrange your guts.
the belt’s still hanging loose around his hips. his smile’s a little crooked. and he’s already reaching for a red pen.
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biggest-gaudiest-patronuses · 3 months ago
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hero/villain showdown but one of them has a spontaneous medical emergency and the battle gets put on hold while their archnemesis drives them to Urgent Care
#it should be like. a hernia. or diverticulitis#something intestinal for maximum Awkward Scenario#and the entire car ride alternates between awkward silence and the driver lecturing their nemesis on the importance of regular check-ups#this is funnier if the hero is the one having the hernia tbh. but both options are Very Good#want to emphasize that it is a 'medical emergency ' that is clearly not extreme enough for the emergency room#and the sidekick/henchperson gets stuck in traffic so the hero/villain stays for moral support#they spend 8 hours in the waiting room playing Uno (it devolves into a screaming match)#at the end of the ordeal one of them vows to burn the hospital to the ground with their laser eye powers#and it's Not The One You Think#oh oh oh! ALTERNATIVELY:#it's an allergic reaction; one of them accidentally poisoned the other by using like. soybean derivative in a tranquilizer dart#emphasis on *accidentally*. yes they were technically fighting but That Wasn't Supposed To Happen#so now they're obligated to take responsibility and Stay In The Waiting Room#(can't decide if it's funnier if it's the hero or the villain stuck in this situation)#(probably the villain)#“why didn't you TELL me you were allergic to soybeans???”#“um because you would use it against me in combat?”#“as opposed to NOT telling me! which has worked out fantastic for you!!!”#villain being genuinely offended bc they have a biochemistry degree and have invented literally dozens of untraceable poisons#they have the scientific skill to poison their favorite jackass in hundreds of ways#(and have done so before! in admittedly non-fatal outcomes but that was by design okay)#but it's “dangerous” to do them the simple curtesy of informing them about a SOY ALLERGY????#above all else they consider themself a scientist#and they're LIVID that their favorite (reluctant) test subject lied about their medical history#“technically i didn't LIE--#“I read you the questionnaire! the very first time i held u hostage i READ YOU THE QUESTIONNAIRE!!!”#“...the what now”#“the MEDI--holy shit you weren't even paying attention were you#i had you bound and gagged over an ACTUAL BUBBLING ACID PIT and you couldn't even be bothered to--#“--so i was obviously a bit BUSY at that moment! I'm sorry i ignored your VILLAINOUS MONOLOGUING while the BLOOD WAS RUSHING TO MY HEAD but
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sunnyrmrez · 2 months ago
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Three mimir
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callonpeevesie · 10 months ago
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I'm onto something I'm telling you
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chiptrillino-art · 1 year ago
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(ID in ALT Text) Happy very, very late Mother's Day!
I am not saying that zuko is sokkas substitute for kya. or they look in any way similar! The whole concept here is that something was happening at the moment, be it how they were laying in bed, how the hair pooled over the pillow, or how sokka was able to hold onto it. It just brought sokka back. It triggered a memory, and suddenly he relived a brief memory. Making him suddenly miss his mother again. hope you enjoy!
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egophiliac · 3 months ago
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get 'em before they melt!
(the flavors are 99% vibes + first thought only thought, don't take them too seriously)
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firephoenix23 · 1 year ago
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Like I literally have second hand embarrassment for Vox after seeing what Alastor ACTUALLY is like in a rivalry.
Like homie wishes he could be that close to Alastor 😂😂
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