#source : scatterpatter's incorrect quotes generator

[qsmpincorrect]

Foolish: So, what, now we're just supposed to do anything that Cellbit does? I mean, what if he jumped off a cliff?

Roier: If Cellbit were to jump off a cliff, he would’ve done his due diligence regarding the height of the cliff, the depth of the water, and the angle of entry, so yes. If you see Cellbit jump off a cliff, by all means, jump off a cliff.

Foolish: You jump off a cliff!

Roier: Gladly. Provided Cellbit did first.

[emilyrox]

Charlie: Just be yourself.

Sir Pentious: 'Be myself'? Charlie, I have one day to win Cherri Bomb over. How long did it take before you guys started liking me?

Angel Dust: Couple weeks.

Husk: Six months.

Alastor: Jury’s still out.

Sir Pentious: See, Charlie?

Sir Pentious: 'Be myself'. What kind of garbage advice is that?

[letsquestjess]

Crosshair: Why are you on the floor?

Hunter: I'm depressed.

Hunter: Also I was stabbed, can you get Echo, please.

[above-the-foldd]

Jack: *accidentally hits Davey in the face*

Jack: *trying to decide between ‘im fucking sorry’ and ‘are you okay’*

Jack: ARE YOU FUCKING SORRY?!

Davey: What’s wrong with you?!

[ladymiraclewings]

Ragatha, about Gummigoo: Apparently we’re getting someone new in the group. Jax: Are we stealing them? Kinger: New or used? Pomni: Wonderful responses, both of you.

[gay-dorito-dust]

Reader: name a more iconic duo then my crippling fear of abandonment and my anxiety. I’ll wait.

Adam, genuinely trying to bringing you comfort: you and me!

Reader, tearing up: okay.

[do-not-call-me-sunshine]

Nico: I think I’m having a mid-life crisis.

Will: You’re like 15 years old

Nico: I MIGHT DIE AT 30!!!

[blinkinbrothershark]

Jack, with all the newsies sitting in a circle around him: My policy is if you see something, say something.

Smalls: I saw a squirrel in a tree today!

Jack, in genuine awe: Outstanding.

Jack: This is what I’m talking about people.

[ramosdefloress]

Heart: Who thinks I can fit 15 marshmallows in my mouth? Mind: You’re a hazard to society. Soul: And a coward. DO TWENTY.

[slytherinlizzy]

Duskwood Incorrect Quotes pt.5

~♡~ Valentine's Day Edition ~♡~

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Lilly: Hey, Jake? Can I get some dating advice?

Jake: Just because I'm with Mc doesn't mean I know how I did it.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Hannah: Why are Mc and Jake sitting with their backs to each other?

Lilly: They had a fight.

Hannah: Then why are they holding hands?

Lilly: They get sad when they fight.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Mc, pointing: May I sit there?

Jake: That's my lap.

Mc: That doesn't answer my question, Jake.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Mc: ARE YOU MOCKING ME?!

Jake: ARE YOU MOCKING ME?!

Mc: HOW DARE YOU, JAKE?!

Jake: HOW DARE YOU, JAKE?!

Mc: I'M BEAUTIFUL!

Jake: Damn right you're love.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

What Jake says: Are you being done holding a grudge?

What Jake means: I'm sorry. I just want to hug you from behind and bury my face in your neck. I want to get tangled up on the couch and kiss you and play with your hair and fall asleep next to you.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Texting with Jake

Mc: I wanna sleep with you.

Mc: But like in the innocent way.

Mc: ...

Mc: Get your bitch ass over here and cuddle with me you little shit!

Jake: Damn girl, calm down, I'm putting my shoes on.

Mc: <3

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Texting with Jake

Jake: The studies show that you are the most amazing person in the world.

Mc: Source?

Jake: Me. ;)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

[cheridraco]

harry: so what do you do?

draco: I work in genetic research, and I'm currently trying to eliminate all cancers

harry: wow, impressive

draco: then I'll move on to virgos

[qsmpincorrect]

Fit: Fitness tip: never stop pushing yourself. Some say 8 hours of sleep is enough. Why not keep going? Why not 9? Why not 10? Strive for greatness.

Pac: Next time you’re working out do 15 push ups instead of 10. Run 3 miles instead of 2. Eat a whole cake instead of just a slice. Burn your ex’s house down. You can do it. I believe in you.

[emilyrox]

Angel Dust: Who the fuck added me to a fucking group chat?

Charlie: >:O language

Niffty: Yeah watch your fucking language

Husk: OKAY WHO TAUGHT NIFFTY THE FUCK WORD?

Vaggie: 'The fuck word'.

Alastor: Are you stupid? You guys use the f word all the time

Niffty: Oh my god he censored it

Vaggie: Say fuck, Alastor.

Niffty: Do it, Alastor. Say fuck.

[letsquestjess]

Tech: You’re the love of my life and my best friend, I would do anything for you.

Phee: I want you to eat three meals a day and have a decent sleep schedule.

Tech: Absolutely not.

[above-the-foldd]

Jack: Guys I impulsively bought a snake, what do I name him ?

Davey: YOU DID WHAT—

Race: William Snakespeare.

[ladymiraclewings]

Starlight Glimmer: Hey, Applejack? Can I get some dating advice? Applejack: Just because I’m with Rainbow Dash doesn’t mean I know how I did it.