#this one features my other oc in CORE

[literalite]

mistki's the land is inhospitable and so are we (2023)!! as edits featuring mine and some of my friends ocs 😁 had a lot of fun with this project... rough explainer of how/why each song corresponds to each character/s under the cut because i love symbolism and talking! sorry it is long

bug like an angel - sapphire

without spoiling too much of her story and arc... sapphire's life is not easy. she's hurt by people she cares for and who care for her, although inadvertently, and in turn hurts people who she cares for and who cared for her, also not by her own volition. it's kind of a terrible truth that you will harm and be harmed by the people you love, even when you and they truly don't want to. it's up to you how much you're willing to take and deal. you can't keep every promise you make and you can't right every wrong. but you have to keep trying anyway. that's sapphire's strength, and the core of her goodness and why i personally consider her one of my favourite ocs. i chose to depict bug like an angel in mitski's more positive interpretation here and in that light i think it works best for saph

buffalo replaced - heiya

well first and foremost the vibes of the song fits heiya perfectly fhgjk but also lyricism and tone... yep. quick breakdown of heiya's background since i doubt i'll ever be able to do it properly she's an interesting character for me because she like a lot of my other characters has lost. everything. she had a wife and a child and they were both killed and she had to leave her home again and again and unlike how some of my others would have taken this she has never flagged in her unwavering dedication to preserving hope. for herself for her people for the future etc etc. which is a very fucking difficult thing to do! the world changes faster than you can keep up with it sometimes but for heiya she will not let herself tire and be swept away in it all. people rely on her. she's a guiding star as much as she is a woman. she's a lover and a fighter and thats what buffalo replaced means to me! so

heaven - vinny and caleb

i feel like of all my oc couples so far they have like. the sweetest most kind of simply mutually trusting dare i say straight forward love. they just love each other so much and thats all. the world could end around them when theyre together and it'd be okay truly. also yeah vinny is ostensibly in heaven now bye angel i feel like this one was pretty self explanatory. me and who WHEN

i don't like my mind - sunny

he just like me fr (said in denji voice) anyways wow ha. unstoppable unending guilt due to past actions that haunt your every waking moment? throwing yourself into any and all distraction just to take your mind off it, filling your time with other shit so that past sin doesnt for once echo in your awful and hollow brain? this song is perfect for sunny honestly just that sentiment also the "please don't take this job from me".... sometimes the coping is worse. you can be proud of something because you can do it better than anyone else even if that thing is terrible

the deal - wolfgang munch by @gunthermunch

Wolfgang Amadeus Munch. umm this will make more sense later on but it still kind of makes sense now i think. he doesn't want to be himself he keeps . leaving and moving and running away from his own memories his own self in reaction to others. if he could pawn it all off he would. if he could be better in an instant without having to feel every agonising second of change he would! but thats not how the world works. or is it. read munch by gunthermunch thats an order

when memories snow - lilian

i feel the older you get the more your past kind of swells up and trails behind you... at least for lilian that is shes very linked to the different versions of the girl/young woman she used to be. for her its a double edged blade, a lot of her own strength is drawn from who she was and what happened to her throughout her life. they haunt her but she's haunting it back in her own way

my love mine all mine - saige, bellona, ari

stares you down okay so usage of this song very much almost verges into spoiler territory but uhm. uhm. starts twitching basically the whole dynamic here is . sometimes when you love you will sacrifice. and while that is usually a good thing sometimes it is not but sometimes it still is. sometimes you pay your dues for love and sometimes someone else has to pay for your love as well. and whether that is worth it to them remains to be seen. but it's all about love still. whether that's a worthy cause is up to you i suppose

the frost - yoshiki and hikaru from hikaru ga shida natsu

fun fact (or not so fun fact since i had it listed as such) this slot was originally meant to be taken up by a gojo/geto edit and while it still works for them frighteningly well i swerved to do another black and white haired doomed gay pairing gfhjkl; i really recommend yall to read hikaru ga shinda natsu/the summer that hikaru died because honestly it speaks for itself! it's SO good i love it so bad

star - ari and luca by @anjitrait

wow these two did not deserve the horrors the narrative (me) slammed down onto their heads. they're kind of the most married of all time to me but like of course under pressure even the strongest most loving of bonds will warp. they've been together for roughly a decade and a half now. they know and love each other as totally as you could possibly imagine. despite it all i am yours, no matter. are we picking up what i'm putting down chat

i'm your man - nayef and sióar by @lucidicer

after the album dropped like at least 3 people swung into my dms with a ?this you?? about this song which. i mean the fucking dogs that start barking halfway through the song. are you kidding me. but anyways sioyef and devotion. sioyef and putting yourself in your lover's hands and looking to them like they are a god. this is super self explanatory. you know

i love me after you - redacted and ophelia

HM.... all i'll say here is that sometimes the homoerotic tension filled high school friendship where both parties have something very wrong with them but in totally different directions can be. scarring. bad. sometimes love just isn't enough when you don't know what you're meant to do with it and when you've lived in survival mode all your life. but that once the dust clears you can scrape yourself off the ground get up keep going and that isn't gonna be the end for you there. or for love, even. sometimes shit just ain't meant to be and thats ok

[altraviolet]

How do you find a character's 'voice'? I have no problem writing OCs, but when it comes to existing characters I get so anxious that I'm mischaracterizing them!

This is a great question! This is definitely something I struggle with sometimes. Here are some of the things I've done to try to keep characterization consistent:

watched a bunch of videos about characterization and the craft of writing

gone back to the canon and reread parts that featured the character you're trying to write

reduced the character to like, ONE descriptor, ONE "essence," if you will. JRO did a great job making very identifiable characters for us. although many of the initial characterizations are modified by the end of the comic, you can still use that "essence". I'll give an ex in a minute but after you identify that "essence," keep it in mind for your character when you write them

when writing from their POV, or from a close third narration (or heck second person talking to them), remember what the character knows. how did they get to the place they are now? what kinds of details in a room would they notice?

This is not all I've done but it would take me SO LONG to put together more points so we'll move on~!

Okay so for more details on the above:

The Essence Thing

I think Ultra Magnus is a really good example of this. We're introduced to him having a very specific outlook on life (we literally see through his eyes in one early panel, it's great). We understand him to be a VERY strict mech who adheres to the Autobot Law to the letter (semi-colon, actually, lol). We see him meticulously arrange and rearrange objects, we see him point out screws that are misaligned by 0.001% (paraphrase, I don't remember the exact wordage). All in all, it's really easy to understand in just a couple of words who he is. Meticulous to a fault. Rodimus distracts him by using bad grammar on purpose.

By the end of the comics, he's loosened up a little. And (SPOILERS for the end of the comics), Megatron telling him to abandon his armor and be true to himself is something he's receptive to. Whereas in the beginning he wore it as somewhat literal armor. And refused to smile.

So what have I done with my fic? Well, it's important to keep in mind that UM isn't going to change all his ways. He won't be as much of a stickler as before, because he's learned to have friends in some capacity, and that's loosened him up a little tiny bit. But he's going to retain that core trait of being really into keeping things neat and tidy. And, the UM that Megatron told to abandon his armor isn't the one that made the jump. So I assumed they had that convo later in their friendship. The TEG UM still has those organized traits (cuz it's funny), but he's not as bad as he used to be.

So hopefully that makes sense. Boil your character down to a trait or two and keep it in mind for everything.

Oh boy the asks are piling up so I'm gonna try to go a bit faster now.

What The Character Knows

Let's do a little thought experiment. Tailgate and Drift walk into a random Autobot bar. What does each mech notice?

If I said one of them quickly identifies friendly mechs and the other one identifies unfriendly mechs, can you tell which did which? Who notices the energon specials and who takes note of the weapons behind the bar? Which one will remember a time he went with his conjunx to a bar and didn't get in a fight? haha

Okay so you can probably guess the answers that I intended for the above! Drift had a hard past, then became a violent Decepticon. Tailgate was asleep for 6 million years and then woke up and befriended a ton of people and had Movie Nights and also some trauma but he never had to fight for his life like Drift did.

So, as you can see, what the character knows (which is informed by their past, their education, their belief systems, the friends they have, the enemies they have, etc) really impacts how they see the world. And you can use that to your advantage by trying to look through their eyes keeping in mind what they know.

Sorry I'm gonna have to end this here, but this is a great topic. I'll try to write more about character voice and POV in the future. If you want to poke me later about it here or on twitter, please do. I will get my thoughts together and also find the links to the videos I've watched :)

[acknowledge-reigns]

Worst To Me (Roman Reigns x Black!fem oc SMUT! 18+!!!)

Description: After Roman loses his title he knows the perfect way to blow off some steam.

Warnings: Dom/sub dynamic, masochist sub!oc, sadist Dom!Roman but obviously ssc, nipple play, spanking, rough sex, dirty talk, name calling (slut/slutty, toy.), petnames (babygirl, sweetness), edging, hair pulling/tugging, begging, marking/love bites, creampie, Honorifics (My tribal Chief. Daddy).

Song: Worst To Me by Noah Davis.

Other stories featuring Roman x Lilah include: Jealous, 34+35, There Goes My Baby and Nonsense.

My entire Masterlist can be found here.

Face claim: Jaylon Barron

Again, MDNI!!! THIS IS AN 18+ FAN FICTION. As always my stories are about Roman Reigns NOT Joe Anoa'i. Mostly smut with sprinkles of Angst and Fluff.

As Roman walked backstage, frustration and anger coursed through his veins. How fucking dare they. Seth, Jey, Sami. Every person who he ever loved that had stabbed him in the back had to just cost him the title. He lost to Cody fucking Rhodes of all people. He knew he needed to release some tension.

Lilah was always there to provide him with what he needed - she craved that pain and pleasure in equal measure as much as he craved giving it to her. A perfect little canvas for him to mark up. To make her scream and writhe, whimper and moan. Bring back his sense of control.

Tonight, she would be the one who helped him forget about everything else. She was waiting for him in his private locker room, wearing nothing but red and black lingerie that hugged her curves perfectly just as he'd instructed her to before he went out for his match.

Without a single word he grabbed her roughly by the waist and pinned her against the wall, his strong arms holding her in place as he pressed his lips against hers with a force that left no room for questioning who's in charge here. She moaned softly into the kiss and arched her back towards him, eager to feel more of his touch but he paused.

"Safeword, babygirl?" Roman questioned.

"Pickles, My Tribal Chief." Lilah responded.

"Good. Remember it, Sweetness because I'm not gon' go easy on you tonight." He stated as he began exploring every inch of her body with rough hands having made quick work of undoing her bra.

"Do your worst." Lilah teased.

With a smirk he began squeezing and pinching her hardened little nipples, taking his time enjoying her reactions as he twisted them. She squirmed beneath him, begging for mercy through whimpers and gasps.

Roman ignored her pleas, since none of them were their agreed upon safe word and continued to unleash his pent-up frustration on her body. He grabbed a handful of her hair and yanked it back, exposing the delicate curve of her neck where he sank his teeth into the tender flesh without hesitation. She let out a cry of pain that quickly turned into moans of utter bliss as he sucked hard enough to leave marks all over her.

Fuck. He was marking his territory. As if he were saying 'They can take my title, they can take everything else but can't nobody take my woman'.

Roman smirked, he knew she was enjoying every second of it, even though she pretended otherwise. He let go of her hair and spun her around so that she was facing away from him, giving him access to that plump juicy ass he loved so much. With a low growl, he pulled down her panties and spanked her hard enough to make her gasp and illicit a nice appealing jiggle.

He spanked her repeatedly, alternating between left and right sides with each blow. The sound of his palm meeting her flesh echoed through the room, mingling with their heavy breathing. She could feel herself getting wetter by the second.

"You forgetting to thank your Tribal Chief huh? I know my little toy knows better than that." Roman spat oozing dominance from his very core that left her breathless as he slapped her ass harder.

"Fuck! Thank you, My Tribal Chief." Lilah cried out.

He felt his anger and frustration slowly dissipating as he lost himself in the sensation of punishing Lilah. He grabbed her by the hips and lifted her up, carrying her towards a nearby bench where he bent her over with ease. He could manhandle her like a little rag doll, in truth he could probably manhandle most anyone that way if he wanted to. He's Roman Reigns.

Roman positioned himself behind her. Lilah felt his hot breath against her skin and then the unmistakable sensation of him entering her from behind. He started thrusting hard and fast, using all his strength to claim every inch of her body as his own. His. Something Cody can't take. Something Seth can't take. Something Jey can't take.

Lilah let out a moan as Roman pounded into her relentlessly. She could feel herself getting closer and closer to the edge with each passing second, but she knew better than to beg for release before he was ready to give it. Not when he was like this. He needed to feel completely in control.

His hands gripped her hips tightly, keeping her in place as he felt his own pleasure building up inside him as he continued to ravage Lilah's body. He leaned forward and whispered in her ear, "I love those pretty little noises you make you hear me? You gon' let the whole locker room hear you fucking acknowledge me." Roman said.

She was unable to form coherent words with the way he was making her feel. With a wicked grin on his face, Roman increased the pace of his thrusts. "I own this fucking pussy. I will always own this fucking pussy." Roman growled, "Say it!" he demanded.

"You own this fucking pussy" Lilah repeated barely between moans.

"Say it again. Say it again. Louder." Roman ordered.

"You own this fucking pussy, daddy." She stated as loud and clear as she could.

"That's what I thought. This slutty little pussy acknowledges me." Roman let out that smug little chuckle he does.

Roman could feel himself getting closer to the edge but He slowed down his pace and focused on hitting all the right spots inside Lilah, causing her body to shudder with pleasure. She let out a series of high-pitched moans that filled the room with an intoxicating energy. This is control. This is power.

He continued to tease Lilah, bringing her right to the brink of orgasm before pulling away just in time. He enjoyed seeing her squirm beneath him, desperate for release but unable to do anything about it without his permission. Finally, after what felt like an eternity of denial and torture, he let go completely and allowed himself to be consumed by the pleasure. Lilah let out a scream of ecstasy as she reached her peak, her body convulsing with waves of pleasure that seemed to go on forever and ever. Roman followed suit soon after, his own release hitting him like a tidal wave as he buried himself deep inside her one final time filling her with his seed.

After cleaning up and catching their breath, Roman led Lilah over to the locker room couch where they could relax in each other's arms. He wrapped his muscular arms around her and pulled her close, kissing the top of her head gently. "Are you okay?" he asked softly as he stroked her hair back from her face. "That was... intense."

"I should be asking you that. I know what that title meant to you." Lilah said.

Roman sighed and pulled her even closer, his expression growing serious. "It did mean a lot to me," he admitted quietly. "But at the end of the day, it's just a belt. It doesn't define who I am. I'll always be Roman Reigns." He paused for a moment before continuing. "What matters most is that we stay together through thick and thin, no matter what happens. Belt or no belt."

"Wait, is that what all this was about? you were worried I'd leave you if you aren't champion?" Lilah asked softly.

Roman looked away for a moment, embarrassed that he'd let his insecurities get the best of him. "Maybe," he admitted reluctantly. "I know it sounds stupid now, but I guess deep down I was afraid you'd stop loving me if I wasn't on top anymore."

There it was. That trauma rearing it's ugly head. People leave. Seth left. Jey left. Sami left. Hell, Dean left. That same trauma that cost him his damn title tonight.

Lilah smiled softly and reached up to caress Roman's cheek. "Hey, listen to me," she said gently. "You don't need a title to be worthy of my love. You are an incredible person with so much talent and potential that it takes my breath away sometimes. I will always love and acknowledge you." She paused for a moment before adding, "No matter what".

Roman felt a lump form in his throat as he listened to Lilah's words. He knew she was being sincere and that her love for him ran deep, but it still didn't completely erase the doubts that had been nagging at him ever since he lost the title. "I appreciate everything you just said," he finally managed to choke out after a few moments of silence. "But I can't help feeling like I let everyone down when I lost my title.. The family.. I was supposed to keep us at the top of the mountain."

Lilah nodded in understanding and wrapped her arms around Roman's neck, pulling him close. "I know how much it means to you," she said softly. "But the truth is, no one can keep us at the top forever. Sometimes we have to take a step back and rebuild before we can come out stronger than ever. You did it for four years, Roman. That's special." She said

Roman smiled at Lilah's words and kissed her gently on the forehead. "You always know just what to say," he said softly. "I don't know where I would be without you." He pulled her closer and held her tightly, feeling grateful for her love and support. Roman and Lilah stayed cuddled up on the locker room couch for a while longer, enjoying each other's company and trying to forget about the stresses of their professional lives. Eventually, though, they knew that it was time to get back out there and face whatever challenges lay ahead. Just not right now.

[trash1129]

×,.·´¨'°÷·..§SELF-SABOTAGE§.·´¨'°÷·.. -a Soobin smau (+ written chapters)

Summary: After (Y/n) breaks up with her ex, Do Jaeyi, she isn’t left alone by him. Finally after being bothered nonstop, she breaks and tells him she is dating her high school rival, Choi Soobin. Now they are left to keep up the act of being a couple till this all blows over. Little does (Y/n) know Soobin has been waiting for a chance like this.

a/n: here we go again with me attempting another smau! I’m more excited about this one because I actually planned stuff for once :D I really wanted to try my hand again at one of these and wanted to try an enemies to lovers type situation

☆Rating: 16+

☆Release date: March 2nd, 2023

☆Ending date: August 15th, 2023

☆Status: ended

☆Pairing: Choi Soobin x Fem! Reader, mentions of past relationship with an OC, and maybe some pairings on the side if I wanna add some spice ;D

☆Content: smau with written chapters, fluff, crack (idk if it really is bc I don’t really think I’m that funny), some angst at some point tbh, fake dating, semi-enemies to lovers, semi-mutual pining, psych major!(y/n), dancer!(y/n), psych major!soobin, barista!beomgyu, college!au, slow burn ig???

☆Warnings: lots of swearing (I have potty mouth myself so they all will too), some suggestive parts maybe and some mentions of sex but no smut bc smut isn’t something I write, chapters may be long idk yet, I didn’t really pay attention to like grade levels in relation to age so we don’t need to pay attention to if it’s accurate or not

☆Featuring: the rest of txt, lee chaeyeon (iz*one/solo), Lucy (weki meki), probably some other idols in passing

DISCLAIMER: This is a piece of pure fiction and do not represent txt artist, iz*one/solo artist, weki meki artist, any other artist or reflect their actual selves or morals. All in this fan fiction is 100% fake and not real at all

Profiles:

The ass shakers

Soobin’s emotional support group

Chapters:

01. ONE OF US RRRAHHHHHHHHH🦅

02. You see how easy it is to lie?

03. Twinkle toes

04. Don’t HMU😣😭😿💔

05. I’m meeting Lucifer today! (Written, 1.9k + sns) unedited

06. That's the spirit!

07. That is a (Y/n) response

08. Very Soobin core

09. Is that Choi Beomgyu?

10. Soob is a broke ass bitch

11. I was threatened 🥺🥺 (Written, 2k + sns) unedited

12. I do but I don’t :D

13. Darling baby girl

14. FEED ME

15. Slay or be slain

16. Mean girls Christmas routine

17. Love birds (Written, 3.6k) unedited

18. Because sleepover :)))

19. In the words of Twice

20. And I’m Hyojeong

21. SHUT UP ITS GIRLS NIGHT

22. Skill issue

23. Keep my wife’s name out of your mouth

24. I’m concerned (Written, 1.2k + sns) unedited

25. No pics🗣️ No proof🗣️

26. Not you too

27. Oh f*ck

28. Prettiest face I’ve ever seen

29. …what?😃

30. I know. I’ve known.

31. fanfic levels

32. Master manipulator (written, 1.9k + sns) unedited

33. Crush (written, 2k) unedited

34. Limited addition animal crossing switch

35. Epilogue

Bonus!: New privs

Bonus 2!: Daily bf texts

[greenhappyseed]

Anyone interested in some fic recs? Here’s a few ones I recently read and am enjoying — I prefer long, slow burn stories heavy on characterization/character study with adult protagonists, so that’s what’s on the list! As always, check the ratings and mind the tags; almost all are M for themes/language and a few have E chapters. This list is not exhaustive, and doesn’t include many older works, so if you have q’s or want more recs, ask away!

EraserMight

Blood Orange by @flyingjemsaucer is my happy place right now (the author has other lovely EraserMight fics too). It’s a wonderful AU with orange farmer/vendor Toshinori and teacher Aizawa. This one is interesting and different because Toshinori is un-injured and Aizawa has his post-PLF disabilities. As a bonus, this fic also has great DadMight and Dadzawa, with David Shield and married Mic/Midnight as the best friends of the lead pair.

Closed Fist and Bleeding Heart by MoonlightAndDust (who I believe also wrote this AU twitfic). Just all around good, canon universe, angsty EraserMight.

EraserMic

Nine Lives by machiroads (also check out the author’s Naruhata Noir, which ties in to Vigilantes lore). This one is set during Aizawa’s canon post-war hospital stay and features a super fun Mirko, snarky little shithead [affectionate] Shinso, and good OCs. Honestly, the EraserMic romance is just one part of the story, and that’s fine because it’s full of other things.

And When It All Goes to Hell by @purekesseltrash (also check out the author’s Rooftop Necromancy series for a band AU). Both of these fics are examples of an author’s other hobbies/interests making the fic truly special. This one is a hockey AU and it’s great! Filled with lots of cool details, it cuts between the teenage rooftop trio and the adult Hizashi and Shouta reuniting after 10+ years to figure their shit out. Knowing some hockey stuff helps, but isn’t required at all — the drama is still there! And if you want to read about 1A students in this hockey AU, then you’re in luck because the author has that too (though I have yet to read it myself only because I prefer adult protagonists).

ToshInko

Naive Melody by @aconstantstateofbladerunner. I also like many of the author’s other works including For Kurou and Dekugate, but I think this one deserves more attention for its terrifying premise and action sequences. It keeps the core “hero society” concept from MHA and then goes and does its own thing. Also, I love the Talking Heads references — you KNOW how I get with my 80s new wave music!

Bones of You by @thoughtfulraven. A really sweet story set in the canon universe, with BFFs Inko and Mitsuki and a closer look at Toshinori’s mental state.

Nighteye/All Might

Happiness by @puddinginthemix made me like Nighteye, and that’s a feat. Set in the canon universe with canon events…I’ll just say this one made me tear up a bit.

DadMight and gen All Might

Living Well by @krisingtons is super sweet. If you want some DadMight fluff, this is where you go. (I also happen to really like the Quirk Development Theories series, especially the OC that pairs off with Inko in one of the later stories because they all work together so well to support Izuku).

Learning to Trust by @siriusfan13, a longtime favorite. Not only is this a fantastic look at All Might in the year before he agreed to work at UA, but the author links some amazing DadMight/genMight fic recs at the end of (most) chapters.

Kacchako & also Hawks (WhaaAAaa????)

Toy Soldiers by AJLenoire is a bit of a wild card on this list, but it’s really well-written. The multiple subplots within the Kacchako plot and the Hawks/OC plot are all fun, and the Hawks/OC relationship is a blast.

[sentfromwolves]

◈—⌈ SENTFROMWOLVES ⌋ writeblr introduction ²⁰²⁴

Hi everyone, and welcome to my writeblr 2024 introduction. My name is Eran (they/he & freshly thirty) and I've been on writeblr for awhile, so you might've seen me around. ( •̀ ω •́ ) This is my yearly post to introduce the projects I'll be working on this year, what I write, and who I am. I'll be keeping it short and sweet.

I'd love to meet more writers this year, so if you write any of the following, or just like these genres, or even just wanna shout about ocs together, come holler and I'll give you a follow!

◈ — sci-fi and fantasy of any kind! cozy fantasy, romantasy, epic fantasy, space opera? this is my bread and butter, and I love shouting about it from the rooftops with others! ◈ — found families, ot3s, complicated soulmates. I am almost always writing about soulmates who have either killed each other at least once in the past or are planning some sort of murder. Complicated relationships, especially found families that aren't all rainbows and butterflies, are right up my alley. ◈ — queer and trans protagonists, large queer casts! all of my wips feature trans/nonbinary leads, and I'm always looking for more queer writer friends to connect with! ◈ — hope at the end of the tunnel, but hell to get to. I write stories with hopeful endings, with the sun on the horizon, with the promise that something better might now at long last be on the way. I love seeing characters get put through hell, but I love it even more when they make it to the other side. (if you write tragedy though, please know I will still cry on your doorstep if you'll have me) ◈ — corruption arcs, redemption arcs, sometimes both! Deeply nuanced characters with messy attitudes, and even messier actions. I'm just as equally obsessed with cool worldbuilding as I am with character-driven things, and I will yell about ocs all day, and maybe draw them too >:3 ◈ — big, epic, and sweeping worldbuilding! I am a huge fan of delving into the worldbuilding aspect of my wips. I love building magic systems, cultures, geographies, and more. One of my 2024 projects is doing a worldbuilding experiment blog at some point. I am always down to clown over worldbuilding, whether to sound board or just holler together!

There's a lot more I could say here, but this post can only get so long! Σ(っ °Д °;)っ my dms are always open, and I will follow back most of the time! But just to get all of the basics outta the way:

◈—« here's a quick and dirty rundown of how I work! »—◈

➺ I interact and follow from @calamityeden, so if you see that username, it's just me.✌️I am most active on discord, and if we become friends, you're more than welcome to ask to add me there. ➺ I am open to being tagged in writeblr games! Just know that I am not online all the time, and might be slow to respond to them. 🐌 ➺ My ask box and DMs are open, just please be respectful. I love meeting new writers and talking about projects! I am happy to chat and make new friends. You're always welcome! 💌 ➺ This is a strictly 18+ writeblr. Please DNI with me if you are a minor and respect my boundaries.

🪄You can find my core tags here under my writing and my graphics, as well as writer reminders, game train and catharsis. (❁´◡`❁) And now onto the fun part! My 2024 main project line up!

I have my main four listed here that you'll probably hear me yelling about pretty consistently, but I've also got a lot of other projects rattling around in my brain. So if you're ever curious about a project that's not here, feel free to yell at me about it! >:3

Genre: Dark Urban Fantasy Standalone.

Status: First Draft Complete (117k)—Revising for beta round one.

There's a clock tattooed on Nemesis's wrist, and when it reaches midnight on his 21st birthday, it will kill him. It doesn't help that his mom is the one that cursed him, and the demon currently possessing his car ate her before Nemesis could convince her to break the damned thing. Thankfully, Judge came prepared with an alternative: help him break into a mythical living city and steal its heart, and in return, he'll shatter Nemesis's curse for free. Accompanied by a three-headed hellhound, a haunted holy sword, and an excommunicated exorcist, Judge and Nemesis set their sights on an impossible heist. But the closer Nemesis gets to the heart, the more he begins to realize that he isn't the only one under a curse. And if he doesn't find a way to break Judge's soon, his own life will be forfeit as well.

Genre: Space Opera

Status: 2024 zero drafting from scratch

Two hundred years ago, humanity expanded to the stars only to find a cosmos filled with graves. But then their children began displaying the strange ability to commune with the alien ruins scattered across the planets, waking ancient, extrasolar mecha from their sleep, and turned the struggling colonies of space explorers into the fledgling galactic nation of Sol Galatea.  Now, Wren Akane is on the run from the whole galaxy, wanted for the strange alien powers throbbing through his veins. His luck runs out when he accidentally awakens an ancient Relic in the desert of his planet, only to be embedded with the memories of its last pilot and the revelation that the war that littered the cosmos with graves is far from over. But no one believes Wren when he tells them that continuing to wake the Relics will bring the hostile alien empire that destroyed them back to Sol Galatea’s doorstep. Only Wren’s rival pilot, Marek Khalid, seems interested in a word Wren has to say. But Marek doesn’t want to save Sol Galatea. He has big plans for what to do when the aliens arrive, a rebellion to lead, and if Wren isn’t on his side, he’s in his way. With time running out, Wren must soon decide how far he’s willing to go to save the people that never tried to save him—or if Marek is right, and he should let the stars burn instead.

Genre: Adult Romantasy

Status: First Draft (1k/100k)

Once a year, Celestials from all across the Lumina Kingdom gather together for Eventide, the season of courtship, hoping to win the hand of the most eligible star at court. Sirius knows the game they play all too well: by day, he is the forgettable, miserable daughter of the Lumina Family, least of his seven siblings and wanted only for the royal blood running through his veins.  By night, however, Sirius is the Starweaver—the mysterious dressmaker taking the kingdom by storm. Everyone wants to know the identity of the one responsible for elaborate outfits that turn even the quietest Celestial in the room into the star of the show, outshining even Sirius’s luminous sibling, Diana. When the infamous King Beyond Midnight arrives with the intent to wed Diana, Sirius finds his secret in jeopardy when the condition for their hand in marriage is a simple challenge: reveal the Starweaver's true identity. There’s no outsmarting Octavian for long, and soon, Sirius will have to make a choice: give up on his passion and stay hidden forever, or risk everything to stay true to who he really is.

Genre: Second World Urban Fantasy

Status: Outlining

Something changes the day that Nakano Touya returns to the crumbling city of Soma Lux. It starts with voices in the radio static, blurry figures caught on camera, always out of focus. When a monster crawls out of Touya's television screen and eats him, the last thing he expects is to find a strange, shadowy otherworld lurking on the other side. But his biggest problem isn't the monsters of the otherworld that want to eat him, or the talking cat that saved him, now living in his apartment without a care in sight. Soma Lux is experiencing a strange new epidemic—one that Touya is completely unaffected by. But when his half-sister falls comatose, Touya knows he has to get to the bottom of it all to save her—and find out why he's the only one immune. Accompanied by his jaded ex-boyfriend, Touya’s nosy classmates, a part-time fortune teller, and a cantankerous old hag, Touya dives into the murky underbelly of Soma Lux, where the realities have begun to bleed together between his world and the next. 

That's all for now! >:3 Here's to an amazing 2024! (also my actual blog is a mess right now please do not mind it ksjndfskfn)

[moonyasnow]

Hello!

I saw that your requests are open, and was wondering if you could maybe write the „dancing in the dark with him“ thing for Rook?

It’s your favourite fic of mine so far!!

This is my first time requesting + English isn’t my first language, so I hope I did this right, I’m sorry if not ^^“ pls take as much time as you need!

Dancing in the Dark: 2

PROMPT : Dancing in the dark with him

(This is the 2nd entry of 'Dancing in the Dark'! The first one, featuring Idia, can be found here)

CHARACTER(S) : Rook

TYPE : Short fic (~1.2k words)

CONTENT: PLEASE forgive my French I used Google Translate ; ;, Reader is implied to not like crowds, very brief mention of some of my OCs in the background, takes place during Glorious Masquerade but has no spoilers

The stone-columned hall swelled with music, its polished marble floors reflecting the candelabras to cast a dreamlike candlelight over the room.

'Comme une histoire.'

Oui. Like a scene from a storybook. And out of second nature, he watched.

Watched his dear Chevalier de la Reine and Monsieur Pommétte dance, the former attempting to teach the latter. Watched Roi de Neige in all his glory, kindness radiating from him. Indeed, it had been a delight to observe him so closely on this trip.

Yet still… His eyes were drawn to a small corner of the dance floor, one where few would look, to see you twirling in the small circles of a makeshift waltz, your feline companion in your arms to indicate him your dance partner.

It was true that he had been enjoying this chance to watch Roi de Neige up close. Yet, as had begun to be commonplace as of late, he found his attention drifting from his target, and towards you. He'd found himself drifting even from his Roi du Poison. Like a planet caught in your orbit. Or a comet, perhaps? Bound to burn in your orbit, ashes scattering to the winds of your skies, never again to leave?

As he pondered over the nature of your magnetism, he saw the tell-tale signs of fatigue grace your features. That meant you'd be going to seek out solitude. Crowds had a tendency to tire you out, he was well-aware. He had once compared you to the Mimosa Pudica; the 'Touch-Me-Not'.

For a split second, your eyes locked with his, across the ballroom.

Ah, had you known he was watching you?

His heart beat wild with excitement as he began to weave his way, seen yet unnoticed, across the throngs of people on the floor. What a wonderful feeling! One he knew well, surrounding himself with beauty that touched his soul. Yet your particular charms had their own flavor of allure.

And like a bee to nectar, he found himself craving to know more of it.

He caught you in the dark of the courtyard, away from the lights of the venue, the moment you stepped outside for some fresh air. He stepped lightly, on the tips of his toes, simply as second nature to him. But he knew you were easily spooked. -snap- So for your sake, he stepped on a twig to foretell his arrival...

"It isn't very wise to separate from the herd, mon oiseau."

You turned around to face him.

"Oh, Rook." You pretended to act surprised, like you hadn't been expecting this.

He could see it in your eyes. The anticipation. He felt it, too, charging the air. Perhaps you thought that he had you right where he wanted? He let out a chuckle at his thought. Did you believe this to be the end of your little chat perché? There was still so much of you for him to discover.

The more you kept your secrets close to your chest, the more he desired to know of them. And each time you let the hunter a step closer to the core of your heart, he was sliced deeper with the sweet sting of love.

It was a long, slow game. And he loved every second.

"People saw me leave; I'll be fine, I think. It's not like you'd hurt me."

"Non. Indeed, I would not. But I urge you to caution all the same; I would not want some other predator to snatch you up for themselves."

He smiled that enigmatic smile of his that made mere slivers of his eyes visible, the one that always sent your heart racing. He definitely knew what he was doing. It was just unfair sometimes.

"So you admit you're a predator?"

Thinking it over with a hum, he strode toward you.

"It is true that a hunter is not unlike a predator. It is such a delight to observe you in a new environment. Yet," Taking your hand gently in his own, he swept his cape back and bent his knee to deliver a kiss to the back of your hand. "far lovelier still," his eyes captured your own "to see you flourishing in your natural environment, where I may be graced with sides of you not visible to others."

"'Natural environment'…you mean alone in a dark corner?"

"Non, mon petite." he rose from the ground in a fluid motion, shaking his head. "Away from the prying gaze of others. Being observed, you always behave differently than when alone."

"So then here, where there is none but you and I, voulez-vous danser?"

He would have loved to teach you French, if only you had asked. Yet the way your eyebrows scrunched together in confusion each time he spoke it and did not translate himself was too lovely, he feared, for him to offer to teach you himself. The color of your cheeks tinged darker when you saw his outstretched hand and realized what he'd meant, and he heard your breath hitch, the sound sweet music to his ears. Without a word, you took his hand.

Looking at you now, face the very image of one absolutely besotted— much such as himself, he imagined— it was almost hard to imagine you were scared of him when first you met; uncomfortable by his watching... Oui, your expression of unease was beautiful as well. Yet he could not claim to miss it. Not when he was allowed to see the sight before him in that very moment.

When, then, had that aversion turned into this? To flushed cheeks in his presence, subtly trying to stand closer? Though of course, nothing was ever too subtle for him not to catch it.

He knew when. For he had engraved the precise moment into the very flesh of his heart. Did you know when? Ah, non, this wouldn't be something he'd tell you. He would much rather watch you realize it for yourself.

Held delicately in each other's arms, swaying gracefully to the three-step rhythm of the waltz, you seemed almost to be floating over the grass and stone of the courtyard, spinning in circles around the well.

'Just like...'

He found himself laughing.

"See, the way we're spinning around the well? Almost as though it was our point of gravity. It made me think of us akin to twin moons, orbiting the same planet."

"Where do you get it all..."

He'd thought of you as someone else to be figured out, even as he fell deeper for you.

Yet with his eyes opened by the image newly sprung into his mind...

'Maybe I'll let you keep your secrets.'

He knows when. Engraved the precise moment into the very flesh of his heart. Do you know when? Ah, non, this won't be something he'll tell you. He'd rather watch you realize it for yourself.

Might you be able to keep this up for the rest of your lives, he wondered?

He held your waist closer, touching his forehead almost reverently to your own, eyes closed in bliss. "Mon cœur..." he sighed

In other circumstances, he might think he was dying to find out. But for once, no.

He'd rather hold back; let the mystery warm his heart.

He had believed himself to be the one cornering you.

'Mais, mon ange... There in your hands, I see my own heart'

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I hope my use of French wasn't too atrocious! ; I vI) And to the anon who requested this, I hope you liked it! ^^

I guess this is a series now??? I was originally planning to include more than just Idia in my initial post, so I'm not unprepared at least!

Oh— but definitely don't expect me to make one of these for EVERY character. Having the exact same prompt 22+ times would get SO reppetetive But more requests are very much welcome!

[offside-the-lines]

Am I Ready (To Be Loved) | Nathan MacKinnon

Summary: Nate is not known to be impulsive, especially when it comes to love. So what happens when he gets a crazy idea while hungover the day after the Avalanche Stanley Cup parade. a/n: Happy Holidays folks! My first fic back (on this new blog) is a reworking of a fic I wrote for my Winter Prompt request last year (for @fallinallincurls). Thought I needed to start somewhere. This is obviously set in 2022 because I can't stand the idea of the avs squad being different. It also features some of our fave tropes. Pairing: Nathan McKinnon x Female!OC Words: 8K Warnings: alcohol Requests: Open | Masterlist

Charlotte hated these fancy functions. The schmoozing and the small talk were things that made her feel like she was going to crawl out of her skin. No matter how much she would normally enjoy conversation, this just felt fake. And she knew how ridiculous it was. She worked in media. She was always in front of cameras. She took this job knowing this was a requirement. It doesn’t change the truth that, at her core, she would rather be on the couch watching some TV show on Netflix.

Although this wasn’t the first formal event she’d ever been to, this was the first Colorado Avalanche donors’ function. It didn’t help that she had only been working as a correspondent for Altitude TV for a few months; so many knew her name and her face, but no one really knew her personally. So, it was just smile, small talk, comment on the Avs, rinse and repeat.

After an hour or so of this, she was feeling done. Heading to the bar for a drink and found a cocktail table in the corner of the room, tucked near the obscenely large Christmas Tree, where she could just stand and watch. Charlotte looked around the room and wondered how long she had to stay before it was not inappropriate to leave.

“Hate these parties too, eh?” a familiar voice rang beside her.

Despite her shattered solitude, the voice brought out a smile on her face. “What do you mean? I don’t hate this?” she replied, not putting in much effort to hide the sarcasm in her voice. She turned to face the voice and the sight almost startled her a little as she felt her face warm. There stood Nathan Mackinnon in his perfectly tailored navy suit, eyes shining in the dim lighting. She takes a drink quickly to distract herself, reminding herself to be a professional.

“Sure,” he chuckled, “hiding in a dark corner isn’t avoiding the party, Charlotte.”

She shrugs as she turns her eyes back to the party.

“Don’t worry,” he whispers in her ear, making her neck tingle a little, “I really don’t like these parties either. I would rather be at home on the couch with my dog watching TV.”

As he leaned back to sip his drink, she turned to him in surprise. “Oh yeah? Like what? More hockey tape?”

After a bit of light banter, they find that they have the same favorite show, much to Charlotte’s surprise. In the dim corner of a fancy event, they are quoting their favorite lines to each other, trying their hardest not to burst out laughing, hiding themselves behind their drinks so as to not draw too much attention at such a fancy event. Charlotte’s laughing so hard she snorts a little, causing Nate to look at her in surprise before continuing to laugh even harder, drawing some looks from the donors and teammates closest to them. After a while, when they both finally calm down, she feels herself relax a little.

They stood in a comfortable silence for a few more moments before Nate spoke up again. “You know, Charlotte. You ask me questions all the time, but I don’t think I really know anything about you other than your name and your job title.”

“I mean, I only really ever ask you questions about the game or the team,” she responds.

“Yeah, but I’m sure you already know everything there is to know about me,” he said pointedly, but softly. He had a point; it was her job to know as much about the players as possible.

“Okay, I know about NHL Hockey Player, Avs’ Center, Forward Extraordinaire Nathan “Nate the Dogg” Mackinnon,” she says, flashing her hands in front as if to signal an imaginary banner, “I don’t know Nate “a dude who sits on his couch with his dog watching dumb shows” Mackinnon.”

“Alright, that’s fair,” he responds deep in thought. “Fine, how about we play 20 questions? You ask me a question; I ask you a question.”

“How very high school, Nathan,” she pauses to think about it. She wasn’t really sure how to feel about this new friendship. On the one hand, it is her job to get to know the players. Although, she was pretty sure that the fraternizing was only supposed to be in professional contexts. On the other hand, her heart was beating so hard that she could hear the blood rushing in her ears. And at the end of the day, it was Nathan Mackinnon, and he wanted to get to know her. Besides, she knew that he didn’t really date anyway, so she felt safe that there was one of them keeping their feelings in check. Eventually, she responds with a nod, “Sure.”

“Okay!” He said excitedly, his blue eyes lighting up, “Where are you from? Where did you grow up and go to college and stuff?”

“Nathan, that’s two questions. Should I deduct points from you?”

“There are points now?”

“I’m just kidding.”

And so, they went back and forth getting to know each other, talking animatedly, and laughing heartily, until they got through the 20 questions each. At one point, they had migrated to a table to continue sitting down because Nate noticed she was shifting on her feet from the heels. Charlotte was pretty certain that Nate now knew her better than anyone else in Denver.

Eventually, EJ came over and tapped Nate on the shoulder at which point she looked up and realized that most of his teammates and donors had left and they were a few of the last people remaining in the event space.

“Hey,” EJ smiled at you in his signature toothless way, “good to see you’re having fun, Charlotte.”

“Thanks, EJ,” she smiled back.

“Mac Daddy, you’re kind of my ride home, so… are you ready to leave?” EJ said laughing and looked at Charlotte, “I don’t think I’ve ever had to pull Nathan here away from a party before. He is usually begging me to leave.”

Nate bumped his elbow into EJ, not drawing much of a response, as he quickly looked away from her. She could have sworn his cheeks were turning a little pink, but that could also be the lighting.

“Yeah, yeah, it’s late and I want to be up for morning skate tomorrow, unlike you lazy idiots,” Nathan grumbled standing up.

She stood up too, only now realizing how tired you were. “Yeah, damn, it’s late. Well, I had a great time talking to you Nathan,” sending him a warm smile and a nod, “EJ. See you two later.”

As she started walking away, she heard some whispers behind her before Nate called out, “Hey, Charlotte, you good to get home? I mean, do you need a ride?”

“Oh, um… Actually… Sure. That would be nice. Thanks!”

She saw EJ whisper something in Nate’s ear before he was quickly shoved away. Suddenly feeling awkward, she trailed behind them quietly to Nate’s car. As soon as it was in sight, EJ called shotgun and started making a run for it, slipping a little on the ice, making Charlotte and Nate snort with laughter.

Nate offered a hand to guide her across the slippery ground and opened the car door for her, keeping his hand on her as she climbed in. She directed Nate to her apartment, thanking him and EJ quickly as she left. Once she got into her apartment, Charlotte leaned against the door and just smiled for a bit.

*          *          *

Meanwhile, in the car, EJ was basically yelling at Nate.

“Dude, you dog, what was that?”

“EJ, stop.”

“No, I’m serious. I’ve never seen you talk to someone for that long. Not even Barrie or Sid.”

“She was easy to talk to. And it was a good way to get through the event.”

“Nate, don’t give me that bullshit.” EJ’s voice is rarely serious, but it is now.

“I don’t know what to tell you, dude.” Nate shrugged.

The rest of the ride to EJ’s house is quiet and as Nate pulled into the driveway, EJ finally spoke up again, “Tell me you at least got her number.”

“Shit,” Nate let out under his breath before he could stop himself.

“Oh my god, you idiot. You didn’t get her number.”

Nate let out a groan and tapped his forehead firmly on his steering wheel in frustration. As EJ shook his head, and said his goodbyes, Nate’s head was whirring with thoughts. There was no smooth way to ask for her number now. It’s like he missed an exit on the freeway and there was no way off now. The alcohol and the adrenaline meant he didn’t sleep much that night and, for the first time in a very long time, he didn’t make it to the optional morning skate, much to the surprise of everyone.

The rest of the season flew by as the team soared through the playoffs. Nate kept thinking about ways to ask Charlotte for her number but just couldn’t stop overthinking it and psyching himself out; eventually deciding to table the topic until after the season was over to focus on the Cup. But he reveled in every intermission or postgame interview where they got to talk, or the little conversations they would get to have in the arena or on the plane. Occasionally, he’d even slip in a hug, taking in her perfume, under the guise of celebration.

The gossip had now spread through the group — not surprising since EJ has never once kept a secret — and had been an ongoing chirp for Nate. It didn’t help that at the two galas since, Nate was the first one there excitedly scanning the room, but Charlotte wasn’t at either. He’d learn she was covering the Nuggets or the Rapids those nights and would then leave as early as possible.

It got even harder to not think about her as he neared the end of the season, where every phone call with his mom would eventually turn to his cousin’s wedding in the summer and whether he was going to bring a date. Family weddings were the one time he felt he couldn’t leave early, forcing himself to endure the suffering that was being single in your late twenties and watching people be in love. Not to mention all the comments and questions: wanting gossip, wanting a date, feeling sorry for him.

*          *          *

Charlotte was happy with the casual platonic friendship that she had found with Nate. She always looked forward to talking with him at games because he was always more relaxed with her than the other boys, even occasionally giving her a sweaty hug after a good, exciting win. Her co-workers had made some comments about how unusual it was, but she just chalked it up to them knowing each other better now.

The job kept her busy, busier than anticipated. And it felt like the year had flown by before she found herself at the celebration gala for the newly crowned Stanley Cup Champions. The atmosphere was different from the last event she had been to. That one was for schmoozing. This was only for celebrating. The energy in the room was intoxicating and she had a big smile plastered to her face as soon as she walked in.

Charlotte made her way through the crowd and congratulated everyone she saw and recognized. Eventually, she stumbled into Gabe.

“Congratulations, Gabe!” you yelled.

“Lotteee! Thank you!” he yelled back, pulling her in for a tight hug before spinning her around. He was so drunk, but he did look unbelievably happy. When he finally put her down, he grabbed her by the arm and very dramatically whispered in her ear while pointing, “Nate’s that way.”

She looked at him confused and surprised, but he didn’t let her say anything before not so gently pushing her towards Nate. And she didn’t protest, because when she finally saw him, she felt her heart speed up again. He looked jubilant, swaying slightly with EJ, face pink and hair messy. She had learned over the last month or so that she really liked the way he looked with the playoff beard.

Charlotte wasn’t sure whether to disturb whatever EJ and Nate were doing, but once EJ saw her, he let out a screech so loud she had no choice but to turn toward them. “Charlotte! Lotte! Lott Ness Monster! Come here!” But once you got here, he immediately left, vanishing to leave her standing in front of the very flushed Nathan Mackinnon.

“Hi Nathan, congratulations! Well deserved. It’s been an absolute privilege watching you this season,” she said, unsure what to do as her heart kept racing faster at the way drunk Nate was looking at her.

“Oh, stop with that professional speech and give me a hug,” he slurred, pulling her in tightly.

She chuckled and let herself enjoy the warmth and the firm contours of his body against her before forcing herself to pull away. He only let her get so far, leaving one arm still wrapped around her shoulders.

“It’s nice to see you enjoying yourself at an event like this,” she said softly.

“Well, I had to! You weren’t at the last two of these, so I had to find a way to entertain myself with EJ,” he said, pouting. She had certainly never seen him pout, but she was even more surprised that he noticed and cared.

“Oh! Yeah, I had work. Sorry.”

“I know. Who even cares about the Nuggets.” he mumbled under his breath before throwing his head back and yelling a quick “GO AVS!” that was followed by a loud round of cheers. After a few seconds, he piped up excited again, “Are you enjoying yourself today?”

“Um… I think so! It’s nice to see everyone so happy and energetic.” Her eyes scanned the crowd, smiling until she caught Gabe and EJ staring and pointing at them. Before she had the chance to ask Nate what that was about, he was pulling her towards Mikko on the other side of the room.

The rest of the night passed in a blur of drinks, laughs, and the warm firm feeling of Nate’s arm around her shoulders. With each passing drink, she found herself leaning into it more. She was sure her face was so red that it rivaled JT’s hair. But if the boys noticed, which they were too drunk to notice, they didn’t mention it. And even if they did, she doesn’t remember.

*          *          *

The next morning Nate woke up with the worst hangover of his life. He had collapsed on top of all his sheets fully naked, and so he also woke up with a slight feeling of shame and dread at what he might have done the night before. When he finally reached over to check his phone, it was blowing up with messages.

gabe the babe (INCOMING): dude did nate finally hook up with the lott ness monster

JT (INCOMING): omg nate, you have to tell us if you did

mooseman (INCOMING): he definitely did, did you not see how he literally didn’t stop touching her the whole night

Nate buried his head in his sheets and groaned, trying to rack his brain for memories of himself being an idiot around Charlotte last night. But he was drawing a blank. After minutes, he finally lifted his head again and opened a private text to EJ.

Nate Dogg (OUTGOING): ej, please tell me you remember if I did something stupid last night

EJ (INCOMING): yeah. you did.

Nate Dogg (OUTGOING): FUCK what did I do

EJ (INCOMING): you didn’t take lotte home with you you fucking idiot

Nate Dogg (OUTGOING): what

EJ (INCOMING): you just fucking disappeared in an uber without even saying goodbye. and EYE had to make sure she got home okay

Nate Dogg (OUTGOING): oh, well it could’ve been worse

EJ (INCOMING): HOW

EJ (INCOMING): HOW COULD IT HAVE BEEN WORSE

Nate Dogg (OUTGOING): idk if I did something stupid or said something bad

EJ (INCOMING): dude, you have got to ask her out, you two clearly like each other

Nate Dogg (OUTGOING): i have no idea what you’re talking about. we're just friends. we just work together. like you and me

EJ (INCOMING): YEAH RIGHT DOGG if you were touching me all night like that, we would be having a very different conversation ;)

EJ (INCOMING): please tell me you at least have her number now

Nate paused and thought back to the night before, but it was such a blur he didn’t know. But when he looked in his contacts, her number wasn’t there.

Nate Dogg (OUTGOING): nope

EJ (INCOMING): you are so fucking hopeless. i hope you find a pair at home this summer so you will finally do something about this crush

EJ (INCOMING): or maybe when we come back in the fall, she won’t be so single anymore and it won’t matter

Nate felt his stomach turn and he groaned. The hangover finally hit him but he was typing a sarcastic response when another message interrupted his thought.

Sarah (INCOMING): congrats again bro! are you bringing someone to the wedding?

Nate (OUTGOING): wow, really cutting to the chase this morning.

Nate (OUTGOING): and no.

Sarah (INCOMING): what you’re telling me a stanley cup winner can’t find a date

Nate groaned again and muffled a scream in his pillow. He knew that his sister and mom would not drop this subject from the moment he got home. He knew that they would probably try to set him on dates, or worse introduce him to every single woman at the wedding. He lay there, head on his pillow, for a long time, until finally, he had an absolutely insane idea. An idea that can only come to someone after the happiest day of their life followed by the biggest hangover of their life.

Nate (OUTGOING): fine, I’ll bring someone

Sarah (INCOMING): OH MY GOD WHAT WHO

Sarah (INCOMING): NATHAN RAYMOND MACKINNON IF YOU’VE BEEN DATING SOMEONE THIS WHOLE TIME AND HIDING IT FROM ME, I’LL KILL YOU. I DON’T CARE WHAT YOU’VE WON.

Nate (OUTGOING): nope, not telling

Sarah (INCOMING): you are a child and i hate you

Nate (OUTGOING): I love you. See you soon.

Sarah (INCOMING): URGH

Sarah (INCOMING): Love you too. I’m calling mom.

*          *          *

Charlotte woke up with a splitting headache and the room spinning at 6 am. And despite how horribly she felt, she couldn’t get back to sleep. She could still feel Nate’s arm on her shoulder, and his lips against her ear as he whispered something unintelligible, and the scent of his cologne lingering on her hair would waft into her memory every few seconds making her heart skip. She was absolutely certain that he was more drunk than she was, and that he was a touchy drunk. She felt even a little guilty for taking advantage of his touchiness, getting as much as she could last night.

After a few hours of being unable to get back to sleep, she peeled herself up and drew herself a bath with a cup of tea. She still wasn’t able to stomach food yet, but she felt her body relaxing in the warm water, finally letting Nate slip from her mind. Eventually, she got up and padded around the house thinking about the long summer ahead. It was her first summer with not a lot of work to do, and since it was her first year in Denver, she also didn’t really know many people or have any concrete plans.

She had just sat down at her computer to research ideas when she heard a buzz on her apartment intercom. She looked down at her phone confused, but there were no texts there from the few friends she had made so far.

“Hello?” she stutters cautiously into the intercom.

“Oh my god, thank fuck,” a familiar voice rang back, “it’s you. I’ve been buzzing every apartment and I swear your neighbors think I’m a crazy person.”

“What?”

“Um. Oh. Sorry, Charlotte. It’s Nate.”

She was stunned silent. Stunned and confused.

“Um… Nathan Mackinnon…” He filled the silence nervously, “You know… From the Avalanche.”

That snapped her out of her trance as a laugh bubbled out of her. “Oh my god Nathan, I know who you are. Sorry. I was just confused. How do you know where I live?”

“Um, well when we first met, I dropped you off here. So, I made the gamble that you still lived here and just buzzed every apartment to see.”

“Oh. Wow,” she says, stunned, confused and flattered, “Um, is everything okay?”

“Ah, yeah.” He paused. “You know, I just realized how dumb this was. I’m really sorry to disturb you—”

“No!” she says louder than she intended, “No, Nathan, wait. Let me buzz you up.”

“Oh, okay, yeah! Thanks!”

She paced around her entryway, thoughts racing. The door knocks still startled her, and as she walked over, she looked down at her sweatpants and realized there definitely was no time to change and prayed she looked okay.

“Hi, Nathan,” she smiled, opening the door, “Um, do you want to come in?”

“Oh, sure,” he hesitates and makes a gesture to hug her before chickening out, pulling away and stepping past her.

“So, what brings you to my humble abode today?”

“Your apartment is cute.”

“Thanks. It’s not NHL superstar level, but it’s pretty good to me.”

He chuckles and leans a hip on the kitchen island, stuffing his hands into his pockets. His eyes were firmly trained on the ground. She wasn’t really sure what to say, so she moved behind him to start making them both some tea. He studies her as she moves around and wonders how it’s possible she looks so good in your sweatpants and messy bun when he feels like his entire guts might just drop out of his body.

Eventually, he spoke up, “Um, so I realized I didn’t have your number.”

This made her laugh, a proper belly laugh. “What,” she manages to get out, “you came all the way here because you don’t have my number.”

“Well…” he hesitates, “Yeah. I mean, I never asked for it I guess.”

“Okay, do you want it now?” she was still laughing.

“Um, yes?” He was shifting on his feet, rubbing his neck with his hand, leaning awkwardly on the countertop.

“Okay,” she reached a hand out.

He looks at her confused and gives it a slap.

“That was for your phone, silly. Not for a five,” she was laughing even harder now. And his cheeks turned bright red as he handed her his phone, not meeting her eyes. She passes the phone back to him along with a cup of tea, “There you go. So… What was the huge rush? You could’ve emailed me or something for it.”

He paused and laughed, “Honestly, I didn’t even think of that. I guess my brain doesn’t work very well when I’m hungover.”

Charlotte took a seat next to him on the kitchen island as they sipped their teas.

After a few minutes, he clears his throat. “Actually, that’s not why I came over. I mean it, but it isn’t the main reason.”

“Okay?” she encouraged.

“I had a really stupid idea and it was stupid at the time, but now I’m here it’s even dumber. So, I’ll just settle for the number.”

“Okay, Nathan, you can’t just say something that cryptic and not tell me.”

His face went bright red again and he shuffled in place. “No, it’s okay.”

“Okay, no. You don’t get to interrupt my hangover recovery and not tell me why.”

He sighed and looked away. After a while, he mumbled under his breath very quickly, “Fine. Icameheretoaskyouifyou’dcometomycousin’swedding.”

“What?” she said, not sure if she misinterpreted the mumbles or if she was dreaming.

“Um… Well, my cousin, back in Nova Scotia, is getting married in a few weeks. And my mom and sister keep bothering me to bring someone. And I just had this stupid idea. Because you’re the only person I’ve had fun with at those big events. So, this morning, in my post-Stanley Cup alcohol delirium I thought Hey, I should ask Charlotte if she wants to help me survive a social event and get my parents off my ass about not having a date? So here I am. But obviously, that was insane. So don’t worry about it.”

Charlotte looked at him, mouth open, in shock for longer than acceptable, and felt her own cheeks redden. A little lightheaded, before she could really stop to think, she responded, “Sure! I mean why not? What’s the harm in me going? I don’t have any plans.”

His head snapped up to meet her eyes for the first time in a few minutes and Charlotte is captivated by the way his sharp blues light up in response. It was when she saw the smile take over his face and her heart sped up that she knew this was probably a huge mistake. But a mistake she didn’t want to take back.

*          *          *

“So, how long have you two cuties been dating?” the fifth person in a row asked. Charlotte wasn’t sure if this was an aunt or a family friend, but she forced the smile back on her face as she responded.

“Oh, we’re not dating. We work together, kind of.”

The lady looked between the two of them, and Charlotte could feel the hairs on the back of her neck prickle again as she was acutely aware of Nate’s hand resting on her lower back.

“She’s here as my date, yes, but we aren’t dating. We’re just good friends,” he replies gently but firmly, the same way he had been doing all weekend, before changing the subject.

But she was lost in thought. She had been here for a few days, and she had to admit that Nova Scotia was beautiful, and Nate’s family and friends were wonderful. Despite not knowing Nate super well, she had never felt out of place. He had always made sure she was included in conversations, explaining anything that felt like an inside joke. She thought back to all the times she had met a boyfriend’s family — there hadn’t been that many, but enough to know that this was far better than any of them did.

Nate had been awkward and hesitant at first, jumping away every time he touched her by accident on the plane ride over and flinching when their knuckles brushed when he went to help her grab her luggage. But he slowly allowed himself to loosen up a little, reading her lack of discomfort as a good sign. He always prided himself on acting like a gentleman; even though women complained that he was stiff and unromantic, he tried. He found himself putting in an extra effort to hold open the door for her, to pull out a chair for her, to offer an elbow as she walked on the uneven pavement.

If Nate was in his head about every move he made, Charlotte was ten times more in her head. They had only really spent time together at work and work functions. And she wasn’t sure if that’s why something felt different here, more intimate, or if she was just imagining it. She was starting to feel like he was going out of his way to touch her; laying a hand on her knee when they were sitting next to each other, tapping her elbow to show her something, keeping a hand on her back when they were standing.

She had tried her hardest not to lean into his touch every time, but she couldn’t deny the comfort his large hand on her back felt—god, was his hand always this large. It was never too low as to be intrusive; just resting chastely on her mid back to remind her that he was there and was ready to take a break from the socializing at any point.

Whether she was imagining it or not, it was starting to drive her insane. Her skin constantly felt buzzing and hot, tingling in the places he touched, electrified in the places closest to him that craved his touch.

Nate’s low voice in her ear startled her out of her thoughts.

“Hmm?” she responded as she felt her neck and ear flush with the brush of his lips on her ear.

“Oh, I was just asking if you want to go for a walk,” he murmured, “you’re looking a little overwhelmed.”

“Yeah, sure,” she breathed, her voice coming out a little shaky with how close his tall frame was to her.

And so, she reached out and took his extended elbow as they slipped out of the rehearsal dinner and wandered down to the waterfront in silence.

“I can totally see why you love it here,” she finally said.

“Hmm?” he hummed.

“It’s beautiful. The water. With the lights reflecting. And all the beautiful trees. And the fresh air. I can understand why you love coming here in the summer.”

“Yeah, it’s truly something,” he looked over at her with an unreadable expression on his face, but his eyes were warm and soft. It looked like he wanted to say something for a second before he shook his head and looked away. “I’m glad you came with me. You make these big events bearable.”

“Just bearable, Nathan?” she laughed, trying to break the tension in the air she couldn’t really explain. And his chuckles were quick to join hers in the warm summer air.

And just like that, they fell into a comfortable rhythm again, laughing and chatting. Eventually, he walked her back to the hotel and their adjoining rooms.

“Well, here you go, m’lady,” he joked, letting his arm fall from her for the first time in a while. He began to turn towards his room but hesitated for a second before turning back and pulling her into a tight hug. She let herself melt into the hug, embracing the warm buzzing feeling in her chest as she felt his larger frame engulf her. He didn’t let go when she thought he was going to, instead whispering in her ear, “Thank you.”

“Thank me for what, Nathan?”

“For coming with me. For being so good with my family, even though they keep asking intrusive questions. For just being you,” he said, pulling back. They were standing so close together that she could see every shade of blue in his eyes as they looked at her intently. She swore she saw his eyes flicker to her lips briefly before the smallest sharp intake of breath he tried to hide as he untangled from her. She could feel her body ache a little as her cheeks burned.

She didn’t know if it was the glasses of wine or the dizzying tension, but before she could stop herself, she leaned up and kissed him on the cheek. “Of course, Nathan,” she murmured, “good night.” She smiled as she turned away and opened her hotel room door as quickly as possible.

She didn’t dare to take a peek back at him, but if she had, she would have seen his eyes wide, and cheeks flushed in shock. Instead, she quickly ducked into the room, shutting the door behind her, leaning back against the cold wood, and closing her eyes. What the fuck am I doing, she said to herself, Nate is a sweet guy, who I work with. I’m just doing him a favor. And he clearly thinks I’m just a good friend, as he keeps saying to everyone. Get it together.

She walked away and started getting ready for bed. It took her a long time to fall asleep that night, tossing and turning as her mind raced through the moments of the day, all the little touches and glances and the sparkle in Nate’s blue eyes.

 *         *          *

The following day was the wedding, and the morning passed comfortably despite neither of them acknowledging the moment they both wanted to talk about so badly. Soon, she found herself sitting beside him in the church, watching the beautiful bride stand next to her adoring groom.

While the ceremony went on, Nate was having a hard time staying out of his thoughts as the celebrant talked about love and marriage and as the happy couple exchanged adoring words with each other. It was not that he hated weddings, not at all; in fact, he loved them. He loved the celebration and the emotion. But as the years went on, it became a stunning reminder of what he did not have. With every wedding and every failed relationship in between, he felt more alone, like maybe something was wrong with him.

Charlotte noticed that Nate seemed emotional, lost in his thoughts. She had no idea what was going through his mind, but she could sense that he was troubled. At some point during the ceremony, when Nate found himself particularly emotional, he had reached his hand over and grasped hers. She had to try hard to hold back the small gasp that threatened to escape her lips. But seeing his troubled expression, she squeezed his hand. And, inexplicably to her, his hand never left hers, not during the rest of the ceremony, or the walk over to the cocktail hour space. He only reluctantly let go to help her to her seat once they got to the reception.

Although they both enjoyed the reception food, they had both been so deep in their own thoughts that their conversation with the table was stilted and almost awkward. Eventually, as the night wore on, and the gentle fuzz of liquor started to take over, they both started to relax. Nate, after starting and stopping for almost 15 minutes, finally asked her to dance; his heart rate racing as she excitedly nodded yes.

Which is how they found themselves on the dancefloor for over an hour. At first, it was awkward. They were standing a foot apart, dancing independently; she, laughing at Nate’s horrible dance moves, and Nate, feeling electrified by the way her body moved. Eventually, they got closer and closer together until they were swaying in each other’s arms to some horrible Mariah Carey song, making snide remarks in each other’s ears and not caring how obnoxiously loud they were laughing at the jokes.

A few drinks later, their inhibitions were lowered enough that she found herself with her back against him. His arms wrapped firmly around her waist as she leaned into his warm, towering figure. Both of them were no longer sure if they were intoxicated by each other or the drinks, but they did not really care. After they were grinding to a Doja Cat song, she swore she felt something press against her back, but she was not sure as Nate swiftly excused himself to use the bathroom.

And that’s how she found herself at the bar by herself.

“Nate really likes you, you know?” she heard a voice say beside her. When she looked over, she saw his mom giving her a knowing glance.

“Oh, Mrs. Mackinnon, we’re just friends,” Charlotte managed to choke out, despite feeling her throat tighten.

“I know, sweetie, but that doesn’t mean there can’t be more there,” she smiled, laying a soft hand on her forearm. She had never felt herself sober up faster.

“I appreciate that, but we do work together,” she strained.

“Please, call me Kathy,” she continued, not acknowledging Charlotte’s weak protest. And when she did not respond, Kathy added, “You know, I’ve met a number of his girlfriends, and he had never looked at them the way he looks at you. Or even treated them the same way. He’s barely left your side since you got here.”

“Kathy, I’m sure that’s not true. You have raised an amazing son. I’m sure he is just as kind to anyone.” She could feel her cheeks feel heat as she started scanning the room, desperate for Nate’s return.

“Sweetheart,” Kathy spoke softly, “I have been married for many years. There is only one reason a person looks at someone the way he looks at you, and that’s love. If you feel the same way, you should tell him. Don’t stand in the way of your own happiness, dear. Life is too short.”

She smiled as her husband came to stand next to her; and before Charlotte could protest again, she gave her a gentle hug before walking away, leaving her standing there with her head spinning at her words.

Charlotte gripped the edge of the bar and downed her drink in one go once the bartender handed it to her, earning an eyebrow raise. She jumped and let out a little squeak when she felt a warm hand press into her back.

“Woah, it’s just me,” Nate joked before he met her eyes and his brows furrowed, “are you okay?”

“Um, yeah,” she croaked out stiffly.

“Are you sure?” he stepped in closer which only made her stiffen more, “You seem… I’m sorry if I made you uncomfortable?”

“What?” she tried to say calmly, although it came out an octave too high, “What makes you say that? Nope. I’m fine.”

He furrowed his brow more and leaned back, confused, before removing his hand from her back and stuffing them in his pockets. There was a twinge of sadness in his eye as he looked around, unsure what to do. “Okay, then. Do you want to go back on the dance floor? Or I guess not. We could sit back at our table?”

“Yeah,” she said awkwardly, finding a normal tone again, “Table sounds good.”

They sat in silence for a bit, just watching the other guests dancing, both deep in thought. She was stuck thinking about what Nate’s mom had said. If she thought about it, she could totally understand why an outside observer would see their relationship as something more than friends. But if Nate had feelings for her, why did he so insistently refer to her as his “good friend”? And even if he did like her, she wasn’t sure about the implications for her job. Was she going to get fired? Probably not, if she was upfront with HR. But she was new to the city and relatively new to the field. What if people started to see her as the girl who ‘goes for the stars’ or the girl who’s ‘just here to get in some rich athlete’s pants’. She had worked too hard not to be taken seriously now. And maybe if things worked out, it would eventually blow over. But if it didn’t work out… If it didn’t work out, she wasn’t sure what would happen, but she felt it would be bad.

Meanwhile, Nate was panicking; combing through every moment of the evening, trying to find where things went wrong. He was finally feeling like he had an idea of how she felt. Like maybe if he told her his feelings, she would reciprocate. Did he go too far with the dancing? Was Drunk Nate too caught up in the moment and did something inappropriate and unwanted? Nate was never much of a verbal processor — he preferred to stew on things first, —  and maybe it was the remnants of the alcohol lingering in his system but he felt the words trying to bubble up in his chest. He didn’t even know what the words would be; maybe words to explain how he felt about her, to make sure he didn’t do something wrong, to make sure she was okay.

When she finally felt the grip on her chest loosen and the thoughts begin to slow a little, she snuck a quick glance at Nate. His jaw was set firm, and brows furrowed. He was staring into the crowd on the dancefloor, but he was clearly not watching them. He looked tense, and she could see the panic she felt reflected on his face. She found herself reaching out and taking his hand in hers, giving it a squeeze; a move that clearly surprised him as he jumped a little before smiling and relaxing into it.

“Nate, I’m actually getting kind of tired. I’m thinking of heading back to the room. Did you want to stay longer?” she said gently.

He squeezed her hand back and gave her a small smile, although the worry hadn’t left the contours of his face yet, “No, I’m actually ready to head back too. Come on.” He pulled her onto her feet.

They took the ten-minute walk back to the hotel in relative silence, tethered together by their interlocked hands. Nate spent the whole walk back planning his speech; he was going to tell her how he felt because he couldn’t hold it in anymore. Holding hands with her just felt so right. But for her, despite how nice it felt, it caused an overwhelming sense of panic to rush back through her. It was nice. It was too nice. It was going to ruin everything.

Stepping out of the elevator, the words escaped her lips before she had the chance to hold them back. “Nate, I think this was a mistake,” her voice was barely above a whisper. He froze beside her and managed to choke out a “What?”

“Nate,” she said, pulling her hand away from him and backing towards her door, “This is giving me a taste of what I can’t have. And this friendship… I don’t think I can do this.”

“What are you talking about?” he replied, still stuck in the spot where she left him, his voice louder than he had intended.

“The touching, the holding hands, the being sweet… It’s too much,” she said, unlocking the door, not meeting his eyes.

“What—” he repeated, his voice cracking at the end. Her mind didn’t process that the pain she felt was echoed in his voice.

She sighed, stepping into the doorway, “I can’t do this, Nate. Because if we keep doing this, I’m going to fall in love with you. And I can’t do that while being your ‘good friend from work’. So, I’m going to bed. Good night.” She finally met his eye as she stepped back to shut the door, barely registering the way his face flickered from hurt to confusion to shock to hope.

Charlotte rested her forehead against the door and let out a shaky breath. She could feel the tears form and slide down her face. She tried to convince herself that it was the right move, but the only thing she could hear in her head was the sound of Nate’s mother’s voice saying ‘Don’t stand in the way of your own happiness, dear. Life is too short.’ What if Kathy was right? What if protecting herself from pain was causing more pain itself? What if it would work out? As she stood there, she listened for movement on the other side of the door, but she heard none. Was that hope she saw in his face there? If it was, what did it mean?

Before she could finish the thought, she heard shuffles and a rapid knock on the door that startled her. She didn’t know why, but she opened it without hesitation.

"I'm sorry. I'm sorry if I did something earlier that made you uncomfortable. I'm sorry if I'm crossing a boundary now but I would never forgive myself if I didn't say this," he said, looking at her with concern. When she nodded, he continued speaking.

He confessed to her that he had never been this person before, love-struck and irrational. He had always been calm, detached, and calculated, but with her, he couldn't help it. He couldn't help being rash, like inviting her to the wedding or reaching out to touch her and be close to her.

She had told him that she couldn't do this because she was scared of falling in love with him, but he revealed that he might already be in love with her. He had been saying that she was just a friend and a colleague because he was scared, but he had never felt this way before and was afraid he would mess it up.

During the wedding ceremony, he looked around at everyone and realized that he had won the Stanley Cup this year, but he still felt off. He kept thinking about her - how her laughter made him want to make her laugh again, how her smile warmed his chest, and how he could still feel the tingle where their skin had touched even after she left.

He admitted that he had never been sure if he had truly been in love before, and maybe this was it. He thought they owed it to themselves to find out because he believed she might feel the same way. He knew it might not be the most rational decision, but it was everything he had to say.

Feeling a shaky breath escape her lips, she heard the voice in her mind, "Don't stand in the way of your own happiness, dear. Life is too short." For the first time on this trip, she felt her mind still and smiled as she closed the distance between them. With her chest pressed to him, she looked up at him, admiring his soft and nervous blue eyes. She reached up to cup his neck and met him in a kiss.

The kiss was gentle and soft at first, as she chastely felt their bodies slot together; his hands finding her waist, and hers fisting his suit jacket to bring him closer. After not long, she felt Nate run his tongue along her lip and she allowed herself to deepen the kiss, conveying the emotion that was hard to put into words. The feeling of his firm hands against her waist and his muscular body against hers again made her feel as though she were on fire. And she had to admit, she liked this quite a lot. Eventually, they disconnected and rested their foreheads together as they took in the moment.

“So, are you going to say something?” Nate whispered.

 “Yeah, uh, ditto,” she whispered back, giggling slightly.

“That’s it?!” he leaned back in mock horror, “After I poured my heart out, that’s all you have to say?” She could see a smile tugging at his lips.

“Well, I think for the first time in your life, you have spoken enough words for both of us, Nathan,” she laughed as she gave his chin a little pinch, drawing a laugh from him as well. She leaned back in to place another firm kiss on his lips before saying, “I like you a lot too. Like a lot a lot. It scares me. But, as the kids say, you only live once, and I need to stop being scared and just see where this goes because I think I might be in love with you, Nathan, and I need to find out if I am.”

He smiled broadly; it’s the smile she loves, the one where his nose scrunches a little and she can see the genuine happiness on his face. And as their lips rejoined, she slowly started to pull him back into her hotel room.

“Hey, can I ask you a question?” he says, disconnecting their lips briefly.

“Uh, right now? Sure, I guess,” she raised her eyebrow.

“Why do you always call me Nathan? Everyone always calls me Nate.” The question catches her off-guard and she laughed as she continued dragging him into your room.

“I was trying to remind myself to stay professional and not fall for you,” she laughed as she felt the back of her legs hit the edge of the bed.

“Right…That worked so well, I’ll have to remember that one for the future, Miss Charlotte,” he laughed back before kissing her again so deeply and passionately that she forgot whatever retort was on the tip of her tongue.

[ectoplasmic-entity]

A chapter from an ongoing fic that I'm posting (mostly) exclusively to AO3. I'm posting it here because it features my favourite duo, Dan and my oc Kai.

Rating: Mature

Content Warnings: Some medical stuff but not graphic, a little angsty

Words: 3.7k+

Quiet, monotonous dripping echoed through the dark hospital room. Bright, green ectoplasm bubbled and sloshed gently inside the plastic bag without care for what was happening around it. The transparent tube periodically gushed with ectoplasm released from the drip chamber directly into a sickly, pale blue arm. The muscles occasionally tensed up, but there was no issue as long as the recipient got fresh doses of the abnormal liquid. Kai twitched under the heated blanket, his gaunt skin stretched painfully as he frowned in his sleep. Dark, poisoned veins uncomfortably stood out on his flesh. Concurrently, an iciness clustered somewhere deep in his body. It ate at him, thousands of tiny sharp teeth ground away. Yet, the icy pit never crept upwards to consume the rest of him. It remained right where it was, snarling and gnashing viciously but, in a sense, wary. A soft breath slipped out of Kai’s mouth. Red eyes widened in attention to the slight sound. They glowed in emotion as Dan opened his mouth, then clamped his jaw shut. Suffocating darkness imposed itself again; his eyes dulled when he closed them, determined to ignore the sight before him. No matter how much it drew Dan’s attention.

An awful mix of a sweet, metallic scent and chlorine burned Dan’s nostrils. His nose scrunched up in disgust, and he held up a hand to block the foul odor. In the back of his throat, a burning welled up. Dan’s ghost core thrummed against his chest as he uncomfortably swallowed it down. In no time, his body jolted violently. An acid-like… substance found its way back up. Dan’s other hand shot to his throat, fingers latched around it. He gradually pressed on the pulsating muscle to regain his cool. An excess of sweat made its way down his jawline. This… wasn’t an emotional reaction. 

Dan’s stomach churned, a scorching fire that lit up his insides. He felt every last bit of it, tiny claws scraped away at him. As unrelenting and viscous as the hot ectoplasm pounding through his body. Desperate to spill out of him. 

Dan wanted to be sick. 

A low hiss snaked past his tongue. Followed by a soft groan as one hand went down to his side, the other moved to massage his forehead. Heat spiked through Dan, sweat stuck to his face like molasses. He shifted around on the spot, his body tensing. He needed to leave. Now. 

“You’re turning pale, do you need help?” Dan startled slightly at a voice. Right. The human surgeon.

He avoided Dr. Chambers’ calculating gaze. One step back, two steps-

White flooded his vision, and Dan skidded to the side, his feet planted firmly on the floor. A dull ache throbbed in his body. Soft colors slowly put his vision back together, though, a slight darkness blurred the edge of it. “Oh god, I’m so sorry!” Jazz’s voice cut through Dan’s mind fog.

A delicate hand held his arm as Dan steadied himself. Inhaling sharply through his nose, his core hammered in his chest. He peered down at himself as if just seeing himself for the first time before his eyes flicked to the side. Eyes wide in concern and frazzled red hair spoke for Jazz. Her slim form heaved with heavy breaths, her complexion paler than usual. It was a wonder she hadn’t passed out already. Interestingly, the gun holster was absent from her hip. 

“M’fine…” Dan mumbled out uncharacteristically. 

Inquisitive eyes stared at him so intently that Dan hastily tore his gaze away after a minute. Right back to Kai’s still silhouette, as calm as can be. He gritted his teeth. There was a pitter-patter of hurried footsteps, and Jazz appeared next to the bed. She hovered for a few seconds before she bent over, her hand lowering to touch Kai’s arm. The gentleness displayed sent a sharp stab of pain through Dan’s core, it came to a lull and grew quiet. His chest panged with emotion, he imagined crushing it down with a twitch of his fist. The hallway was empty for now. As colorful as the walls were, it was still reasonably dim. The overhead panels still cast that eerie, white shroud. No human would be able to walk down the hall without being seen. But ghosts can appear and disappear at will. All the more the reason to slip away. Dan slowly edged away, Jazz and Kai’s silhouettes vanishing behind the wall. His breath was quiet, almost deathly still, and he cautiously glanced around. Outlines of the hallway furniture crept onto the edge of his peripheral vision. Easy enough to avoid. Slinking along the wall, Dan snaked past the leather chairs and benches. Only the faintest shimmer of his spectral form indicated he was there, nothing but a mere shadow. Dan’s eyes peered in all directions.

The same hush followed, seemingly watching Dan’s every move. He hated it, to be honest. He was aware of it more than he would’ve liked. Hovering over his shoulder like a ghost. 

Voices jolted Dan from his darkening thoughts. The quietness crumbled. He recognized Jack's long-reaching voice, booming down the hall and bouncing off the walls. A heavy breath blew out of Dan’s mouth, his chest thrummed with tension anew, he began to back away from the sounds. A female one then overlapped with Jack’s, just as loud. 

Never minding the furniture or the fact that Jazz would realize he had tried to leave, Dan found himself back outside the room. He stood by the door frame, barely visible, should someone look. His eyes rebelliously tried to peer inside. It took far more effort than necessary to stop himself. 

Arms folded, Dan leaned against the frame, his body unusually heavy. With half-closed eyes, he absently listened to Jazz’s murmurings with Dr. Chambers while attempting to will away a mental fog. Despite the surrounding noise, the hall still felt empty. A different kind of emptiness to fall through for an eternity, as it swallowed up everything around it. What seemed like an eternity was about a minute before Dan stirred. He sensed two people by the doorway. Overwhelming enthusiasm permeated the air. Orange and blue jumpsuits greeted him. Seconds later, in whispered voices, they vanished inside. Dan closed his eyes again, content to just hang around out here. The hospital room was already small, to begin with; he wouldn’t have enjoyed being cramped in there. Not to mention, well, he didn’t want to be reminded of Kai’s current state. Quiet babbles flowed out of the dark room, making the silent hallway stretch out in a way that couldn’t be perceived by the naked eye. It wasn’t literal, just a horrible, sinking feeling. Lost deep in his mind, Dan snapped out of it when his body stumbled. He stared down at the squeaky-clean floor before he quickly straightened his posture. Dan tore his eyes away, ignoring the haunting light in his reflection’s eyes. His body tingled with that stare boring into him, even when he turned away. A weak breath escaped his mouth, and slick sweat streaks became known again. More noise came from the room, and hushed voices rose to hurried conversations. Indistinguishable, as Dan hadn’t been paying much attention. He heard his name. 

Jazz’s head popped out of the doorway, her hair swayed to the side. 

“Get in here. You need to listen to this.” Finality in her tone, she popped back inside before Dan could respond. Growling softly, Dan begrudgingly entered the cramped room. He didn’t go in far and propped himself on the door frame. Just enough to placate Jazz; otherwise, she would’ve tried to drag him inside by any means. A heavyset melancholy hung over the room, now bathed in a deep blue light. Dr. Chambers stood to attention. Stoic stiffness to ensure he had a clear headspace to speak the facts. He surveyed the peculiar family before him. It wasn’t every day he saw a dynamic comprised of both humans and ghosts. There was that tension cutting through them like a knife, they clearly had differences between them. “I’ll start with the good, and then we can work our way through the bad,” Chambers said, his arms folded behind him. 

Jazz tensed slightly at the words while Dan’s ears twitched, indicating that he heard. “The good news is that we’ve managed to flush most of the poison out of his system.” Chambers gestured behind him. “It took a physical toll on his body, not to mention afflicted with some kind of fever. Give it a few days, and he’ll come around.” Maddie interrupted, “Wait-excuse me, poison? What poison?”

“It stumped us too,” Chambers replied with an apologetic shrug, “we theorized that it’s harmless to humans, which is why we didn’t detect it immediately, but incredibly harmful to ghosts.” “The bad news is that I don’t think he’ll fully recover from long-term exposure,” the doctor continued, “his muscular and skeletal structures have degraded so much it’s amazing his body didn’t fall apart at all.” “Ghosts have healing capabilities if that’s relevant,” Dan said, cocking his head. “That would explain why his body remained intact as it is…” Chambers rubbed his chin. “De-degraded, how?” Jazz asked in a shaky voice. Her hands quivered violently as she stepped back to give herself space to process the information. Behind the group, there was a slight clatter as Danny finally showed up. He placed a hand on the frame to steady himself, panting heavily. He heaved a breath in confusion after hearing the last bit of Jazz’s question. “About time you showed up,” Dan growled out. “Shut up…” Danny growled back, his eyes flickered a neon green.

Chambers stared at the bickering Phantoms before they quickly became silent. “We’ve determined it’s a slow-acting poison, but the process was sped up with how much of it was injected into his system. It ate away at the muscular and skeletal tissue until it would've eventually broke down.” A loud cough disrupted the explanation; all eyes went to Jazz, who turned away. Her slim figure quailed with every slow, deep breath she took. Silent, she wobbled to the second hospital bed near the door, and slumped down. The frame creaked, weighed down not just by Jazz herself, but the wave of emotions toiling through her entire body. She took another breath, staring blankly down at her equally shaky hands. Rapidly blinking, her face twitched with fresh tears.

Chambers was by her side instantly, prompting the others to react. Namely, Dan was upright and alert. 

The doctor loosely held Jazz’s arm, gently thumbing for her pulse. “She’s in shock, I’m going to get a blanket, keep an eye on her, and I’ll be right back.” Once Chambers left the room, Dan approached Jazz with the grace of approaching a frightened animal. He slowly came to a stop and kneeled down in front of her. Balancing himself by resting his arms on his knees, Dan looked at her. 

“Kai’s…” Dan started weakly and grimaced, “going to need the both of us, you know? He'll need your help reigning me in, or who's going to tell him about my best behavior?” He didn’t even try to smile at the pathetic joke attempt. Dan looked down at the floor, glad to note that it wasn’t as clean as out in the hallway. A creak drew his attention back to Jazz, who blankly stared. She only shifted slightly in response. Just as Dan stood up, the door opened, and Chambers returned with a blanket folded over his arm in a compact size. He unfolded the material, and carefully wrapped it around Jazz’s quaking shoulders. She automatically gripped the seams of the blanket, breath shaky. The conversation fell off, the information weighed too heavily on everyone’s minds to keep going. Dan found a place next to Jazz, his form towering over hers, even on a hospital bed. Jack and Maddie had a hushed conversation while Danny was deep in thought, indicated by how he leaned against the wall. Finally, “It’s late; visiting hours were over a few hours ago; you need to go home now. These two-” gestured towards Kai and Jazz, “will be staying overnight; the younger Miss Fenton can leave tomorrow if she doesn’t exert herself anymore.” Maddie broke away from her husband’s side and bent down before Jazz. “Sweetie, just rest up tonight. I’ll return in the morning with a fresh change of clothes.” With a kiss on her daughter’s forehead, Maddie took Jack in her arm and left. Danny already had one foot out the door as soon as their footsteps faded away. A concerned look back, another glare at Dan, he was gone.

Chambers pinned Dan with a look, “That means you too.” “I’m staying,” Dan said shortly, his eyes narrowing. “If something happens, we need-” the doctor stopped when he heard a growl. One look at his ghostly visitor, and he stepped back.

“I said,” Dan bared his fangs, his body hunched forward. “I’m staying.” “Alright, I suppose an extra set of eyes would be helpful…” Chambers relented, albeit reluctantly, “call for a nurse if you need anything.” At last, solitude reigned. Leaving Dan and his thoughts alone. Mechanical, controlled breathing seamlessly flowed with the stillness while Dan rummaged through his thoughts. He was conflicted. Initially, he wanted to leave for reasons still not yet known to him. An ugly feeling rose up in him before he swiftly crushed it, ignoring the niggling in the back of his mind. Dan stayed because they would’ve noticed he was gone, and right now, Jazz was the only one keeping him here. When she goes, he goes. That’s what Dan told himself, anyway. His ghost core ached with a different emotion. A fuzzy, uncomfortable feeling in the back of his mind.

A weak gasp of air. Dan’s eyes sharply veered to the side. Jazz’s quivering form heaved with every breath, fast and desperate like she broke the water's surface. Her grip on the blanket tightened and pulled it closer around her. Soon, it grew quiet and steady. A contemplative silence. 

“Why won’t you look at him?” Dan stiffened, his ears tipped downwards. His body sagged with the answer weighing down on him. Rather than respond, his hands tightened into fists and pressed them into the mattress. As expected, he never looked up higher than the bottoms of the furniture. A sigh. The disappointment actually imbued itself into her tone. Prickling in unease, Dan kept his eyes down and avoided catching Jazz’s gaze. “You know, they say that talking to someone, spending time with them, or making physical contact," Jazz said, all disappointment suddenly gone, “helps them come out of their comatose state.” Dan still didn’t respond. He inhaled deeply and closed his eyes. 

“I’m not saying this just because it’s a proven scientific thing,” Jazz continued, not caring if he responded, she missed Dan's sharp look, “you love Kai too.” “How do you know that it’ll work?” Dan finally spoke for the first time. He was rattled when she said… he shook it off.

“I… I don’t…” Jazz fumbled with her words, taken aback by his bluntness. After a moment or two, she finally found the words again. “Something’s bothering you, isn’t it? Want to talk about it?”

“What is there to talk about?” “Don’t be stupid,” Jazz said haughtily, “ever since we arrived here, you’ve been acting like Kai didn’t exist most of the time.” The soft hum of hospital equipment in the background replaced Dan’s voice. He soundlessly moved his mouth, clearly, he had something to say, but the words refused to formulate. The deep blue swirled around him, enveloping Dan in an endless sea of nothingness. Nothing to show the way. Tiny blips of light flickered in the darkness, Dan rapidly blinked to make them go away.  A piece of equipment beeped a steady rhythm from the side.

All this time, Jazz waited in inquisitive silence and patience. She could’ve kept pressing him, but she knew him better than anyone else. Dan was that type of guy who, while powerful, still fell victim to emotional stress, to a point. All the little things that made him tick, his emotional beats, how… “It’s weird, alright, without him,” Dan said with a slight hitch. “Weird, how?” Jazz cautiously prompted. “It’s not a feeling, it’s-” Dan stopped, his jaw clenched shut with a sense of déjà vu hitting him. A conversation he’s had too many times to not tune into her intentions. “You’re not going to psychoanalyze me, are you?” “Depends on how much you tell me,” Jazz replied, cracking a tiny smile. In a blink, it was gone. Dan hummed quietly in acknowledgment. The beeping in the background seemed to sync with the beat of his core. “You have to admit, though, you and Kai have been joined at the hip shortly after you met.” 

Inhaling sharply, ears tilted back down, a light warmth flushed through him. His core beat a little faster. A lull in his mind tempted him to look up at the hospital bed in the corner, if not just a little. Dan still fought it. 

“Yeah, well, he’s familiar,” as soon as he said that, he grimaced slightly. That came out a bit wrong. It was still Kai, just not in the same vein as Dan knew him. “Familiar because you knew him in the other timeline, right?” Jazz already knew this. She hoped the prompting would get the ball rolling and let Dan unload his troubles. That, and she tried asking him about his future before, but he always rebuffed her. What was there to tell, he had told her. Dan nodded slightly. 

“No wonder you warmed up to him so quickly. It usually takes you quite a while to tolerate someone,” Jazz commented. “He and I,” Dan said with a faint chuckle, “I’ve always believed we were stronger together, and we are.” Hook, line, and sinker. Jazz shuffled closer to Dan to hear better. She carefully inched her face around the blanket. “I feel lost without him. Kai kept me from… losing myself,” Dan said slowly. He stared down at his hands and flexed his fingers. “In a world that never cared for me, he was my lifeline because I was also his lifeline; the world broke him, too.” “And you’re not used to seeing Kai like this,” Jazz spoke Dan’s thought out loud. 

The nagging in Dan’s mind intensified with the presence of the beeping. It rang through his head, louder and louder. “I keep thinking he’s going to get up any second now, and he’ll walk it off like nothing happened,” he said with a wry grin. He’s in denial, realization lit inside Jazz like a Christmas tree. With how closed off and agitated Dan became, she wondered if he was trying to emotionally protect himself. And failing. “Are you sure you’re not going to psychoanalyze me?” Dan asked again, disbelief in his voice. 

And there goes my plan to make him talk. Jazz rolled her eyes a little and puckered her lips into a slight pout. She folded her arms and sank back into the comfort of the blanket. She looked up at Kai’s bed, pondering what to do next. 

Well, since they were already here, it wasn’t like Kai would be moved to another room anytime soon. Standing up, wobbling slightly, Jazz held her hand to Dan’s arm. She gripped tightly to keep herself upright. Her body buzzed with a nervous rush of adrenaline. 

“Get up.” “Why?” Dan inquired suspiciously. The beeping equipment relegated itself into the background. He could focus a little better now, he supposed. “Please, just get up.” Jazz repeated insistently. No verbal response, but she felt the tenseness of his muscles moving as Dan slowly got up. His silhouette towered over her, his eyes nothing more than eerie red dots in the darkness. Even without the small room being crowded, the space was still suffocating. The walls shifted around; they stretched as far as their eyes could see, lengthening the room from all sides. It was the shadows playing tricks on them. They were just tired.

Dan’s insides twisted in nausea and apprehension. A sickly sweat replaced the embarrassed flush. He kept his eyes down, absently counting the number of smooth tiles while his blurred reflection stared back at him. Jazz’s hand kept a tight grip on him to keep him from pulling away. It wasn’t like he wanted to fight her anyway. He was too worn down to expend such energy.  In harmony, they walked together. Missing not a step, they crossed the room, and in no time, they were at Kai’s bedside. He never moved or made any sound indicating he knew they were there. Deathly still and eerily calm. Jazz said nothing. She stepped away and let go of Dan’s arm, leaving him to face Kai himself. Her silhouette teetered on the edge of his eyesight. Far enough to give him space, close enough to catch him if something happened. Dan’s chest puffed up with a slow breath, it whistled quietly through his fangs, his core hummed with emotions he had yet to identify. Finally, against his will, Dan looked at Kai for the first time since he entered the room. All this time, he fought the urge. He didn’t have any reason why. He just didn’t want to. Almost immediately, a sense of disgust rose up in him like lava. Blinking rapidly to will the sensation away, Dan saw Kai’s pale skin give a luminescent glow in the wake of the world outside. It was said ghosts were in their purest form during this time of day. The witching hour. For a split second, Dan nearly smiled at the sight. Cautiously, he lifted a hand and glanced at it. Conflict shone in his eyes. They veered back and forth between himself and Kai’s slumbering form. The last time Dan touched Kai, he trembled ever so fragilely under him. It was such a foreign experience that Dan admittedly didn’t want to feel it again.  He guided his hand towards the bed, then pulled it back. Tension tethered itself back into his body. 

Dan missed the look of disappointment on Jazz’s face. His hand fell back down to his side, numb like his ghost core. The spectral thrum came to a lull, and then there was an unspoken yet so easily shattered silence.

[weavingstarlight]

Simple little portrait of Four from @linkeduniverse !

So until a few months ago, I'd never really drawn fanart. I just have too many OCs bouncing around in my head at any one time. But I've tried a couple of DTIYS recently and now in my ongoing efforts to change up my drawing style, I decided I should try spending time working with other people's characters, learning from their design philosophies and practicing iteration instead of constantly drawing one-offs. So this is just a character portrait so I could get Four's design in my head and make sure I had all the elements. I chose Four as my first target because 1) all the LU designs are excellent, 2) especially in terms of shape/silhouette/distinguishing features and considering they're all taken from essentially the same core design; 3) Four has a relatively compact design, with minimal complications but still plenty of room for expression and movement; 4) he is a Good Boi (or occasionally, Bois). Also, I have fallen head-over-heels for this comic, the fandom, and all the art/fics/conversations created around it! So thank you, Jojo, for inspiring me to step out of my comfort zone a bit.

3in x 5.5in, watercolor pencils and gel pen. His gold embroidery kinda disappears in the picture, oops.

[emo-hermit]

DR. RIVER

I figured I would revisit the design of our favourite resident teacher's pet (doctor's pet?). It's my internsona, Dr. River! Though he's definitely more of an OC, at this rate. He just has a lot of my Quirks.

This was mostly made after he seemed to get quite a bit of affection in the RDL fanon channels; so, if you're curious on who exactly this pattern-loving nerd is, look below!

Dr. O. River (he refuses to clarify what the 'O' stands for) is a member of the Rhythm Doctor Initiative within Middlesea Hospital. In some routes, he is the intern - who, after the events of 1-XN, lost faith within the remote feature of the project; and began to attend to patients in person. In others, and most commonly, he is an intern supervisor - a role given to him by Dr. Edega when one particular intern came under his wing.

Speaking of Edega, River is mostly known for his core feature: he's Edega's favourite.

To put in better words: River thrives off of overwork. The more you give him, the more energy he'll have - and, in turn, the more work he'll get done. In addition, he's professional to a fault, seeming almost robotic in the way he presents himself. Observant, efficient, and, most of all, apathetic.

Or, at least, that's how he presents himself to the lead doctor.

Truth be told, River is far friendlier as he looks. An absolute dork with a literature degree; he'll take any chance to ramble about language, formatting, prose and the like. One of his biggest features as a supervisor is that he knows stress when he sees it, and will take an intern's pager (claims its for "intern surveillance") entirely to mark half of their tasks as complete ("I've already treated this lot. Just stick to these four, and I'll handle the rest"). He also hates Edega's guts - more than you think. No, more than that.

He'll drop lore at the drop of a hat ("Want a fun fact? 'M Scottish. Don't sound like it, but I've got a whole lot o' siblings in the central highlands."), crack jokes on a whim and laugh at himself ("How do you get two whales in a red mini?"), and fake Edega's footsteps entirely to scare his first and favourite intern: Dr. Desert [owned by the lovely @fufupng].

In short: Dr. River is a monotonous nerd with a heart of gold. He can predict when patients need treating, and has an obsession with pattern recognition - but, if you need some help with that overwhelming list of tasks Edega has you doing, he'll gladly do 80% of the work for you. As long as you let him talk about words.

[Have any questions about him? Let me know! - Emo]

[deadboystims]

˗ˏˋ꒰ 🌱 ꒱ ) he / him ┊ billy , 17 ┊ autihd , gay , bpd ⚣

˗ˏˋ꒰ 🦀 ꒱ ) inbox : 0 - requests : CLOSED - divider

˗ˏˋ꒰ 🐛 ꒱ ) read rules & blacklist before requesting

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[theverumproject]

OC Smash or Pass Tag!

Thank you for the tag @topazadine! I was too late to vote on your post, but I would have befriended Uileac :)

I of course have to make this post about Dethra! This hot killer robot is the sexiest motherfucker in the entirety of the Verum Series! (Until now, he's gonna have some competition in the future ;) )

Dethra, originally known as “Project Deathrage”, was built to serve as a weapon of war. Fortunately, his highly developed AI gained sapience rather quickly. So he went against his creators and destroyed them all after they killed his best and only friend, Michael. The person who had helped him and kept his sapience a secret for years. 

Michael's last wish was for him to keep his daughter safe, Luce Balton, the main character of this series, starting off with Verum I: The Awakening

At the current point of my WIP, The Robotic Era (2093), Dethra is a leading scientist of the world. As a walking supercomputer, he has come up with many great ideas on how to improve life in the last couple of decades. While almost nobody knows about this side of Dethra, he is publicly known to be a serial killer and mass murderer. You see, he is somewhat of an anti hero. He is fighting for the good of humanity, he has given himself the purpose of protecting the innocent. But to protect the innocent, he kills the monsters of this world. He bloodies his hands to continue on hearing the joyful laughter of children, the chitter of a lovely couple and to see the bright eyes of an elderly person shining until their very last moments. For everybody felt safe and happy, in a world that has left behind its cruelty.

Dethra is a hulking piece of black metal (2.50 m / 8”2) that absorbs almost a hundred percent of light. He finds the peak male body aesthetically pleasing, so he built his body like one. His “abdominal muscles” are even highlighted with red lights. The same red as his unicolored eyes. But eyes are the only features that his face has, there is no nose or mouth, at least not one that you can see. He does have a little secret hidden inside his head though.

This killer robot is the definition of a gentle giant, a hard shell and a soft core. Two of the things that he absolutely loves are children and animals, he would do everything to protect them. He wishes he could have children, but he knows that he would never be the father that a child deserves. Gone so often from home, busy with one of his “killing sprees”. But he is happy to never be alone, after all, he does have a lovely boyfriend and girlfriend, with whom he shares an apartment with.

Their man loves to tease them in any way he can and he also always wants to make them laugh. He loves to be a smartass for fun and always bullies his loved ones. In a lighthearted way of course.

Pros:

Funny

Protective

Lovely to be with (When you're on his good side)

Loves animals and children

Highly intelligent

Very strong

Very fast

Quick thinking

Has invented many things

Can technically perform surgery

Confident

Attractive

Loyal

Is a robot

Amortal

Has saved countless of lives

Cons:

Kills a lot

Has committed many other crimes

Maybe a little difficult to kiss (Cuz he's so tall and doesn't have lips)

Brutality 

Has tortured people

Traumatized a thousands of people (even innocent people)

Not very soft to cuddle

Doesn't have the best reputation with certain people

Lack of empathy towards certain people

Morbid

Can get reckless (arson is pretty reckless, eh?)

Feared

Intimidating

If Dethra met you before he met his future boy– and girlfriend, and has madly fallen in love with you, would you smash or pass?

Tags: @creative-author @rivenantiqnerd @teamarine777 + open tag!

Get on my tag list here

[imliketheiceifreeze]

Miles Quaritch x OC

My Little Scientist- Chapter Four

Warnings: Smut themes, violence, swearing, minors DNI

And here's chapter four, this ones a little spicy....hope you all enjoy! And be sure to let me know any suggestions/scenarios you have for future fics featuring daddy Quaritch. Peace out 😘

Chapter 5

2,596 Words

She awoke with a gasp, smacking her head against a hard object, realising that she was alone in a pod, not nestled in the Colonel's arms. Instead, he was alone out there. it almost made her feel sick and she scrambled to push open the lid and jump out of the plastic coffin, leaning over the edge, she could feel herself begin to hyperventilate. It was as though she'd forgotten she hadn't always been an Avatar, that she even had a human form, how had she lost herself so quickly to the beauty of Pandora, and more pressingly, how would she ever be able to return to this world? A rush of footsteps and panicked voices could be heard down the corridor.

"Gaia!"

her arm was jerked roughly, forcing her to face the various scientists and army officials in front of her.

"What happened out there, is your avatar still alive?"

The same scientist from before was crouching down to look at her.

"Hasn't any of the squad returned?"

She whispered, tears forming in her eyes at the though of Lyle, Mansk, Z-dog being mercilessly ripped apart by the thanator, or maybe drowning like her avatar almost did.

"All of the recombinant soldiers have survived so far, they were evacuated not long after the attack. But the colonel is still unaccounted for as well as your avatar."

A sigh of relief slipped past her lips, glad for the safety of the squad she had only known for a few hours yet had become especially fond of.

"The Colonel is with me,"

she breathed before correcting herself.

"With my avatar I mean, we fell into a river, washed up on a sand bank at the edge of the forest..."

"Good, that's good, he will be able to protect your avatar, we'll send out a rescue team at first daylight, it's too risky in the forest at night."

A woman clad in army gear decided abruptly, leading the audience of people away from the cold, tiled room

"But, what if something happens?"

She all but whispered, capturing the attention of the man still kneeled down in front of her.

"I'm sure the Colonel will protect your avatar, besides we have plenty more avatars at our disposal if we need you for another mission."

He patted her leg, walking out of the room before calling behind him

"And get some sleep, we'll need you linked up for the retrieval mission."

But it wasn't her avatar's safety she feared for, all she could think of was Miles out there, alone in the Pandoran jungle.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

It was 4am when she was forced awake by rough hands, water and food forced down her throat before being pushed down into a pod like some kind of lab rat.

"We can see what you see through this screen, we'll use it to identify your location and get you both out of there."

Was the last thing she heard before she laid on her back, closing her eyes, excitement filling her core as she envisioned herself back in the Colonel's arms once again.

Before she knew it, she had jolted awake for what felt like the nth time, looking down, she inspected her blue skin before remembering the words of the team-

"we can see everything you see."

Shit! her shirt was lying by her side from the previous night, larger blue hands providing a firm grip to her waist and abdomen, her blood running cold as she realised she had essentially flashed the entire team of higher-ups and scientists. Prying Miles' hands off of her took some effort considering every time she managed to remove one, the other simply hugged her in closer; face nuzzling into her shoulder. She wondered if it were possible to die from embarrassment.

"Colonel,"

she groaned, attempting to wiggle out of his hold.

"Colonel."

"Mmm go back to sleep sunshine,"

he mumbled half asleep, sharp fangs grazing her neck as he spoke

"Colonel!"

She jabbed an elbow into his ribs, finally causing him to awaken with a grunt, quickly removing his arms from around her as she suppressed a shiver at the feeling of his thumb brushing a little to close to the curve of her breast. Once she was released from his hold she scrambled for her shirt, hoping to retain a sliver of modesty and once she was fully covered, turning to Miles.

"There's a rescue team coming"

He quirked a brow, confusion obvious on his face.

"I told them our location when I unlinked...and they can see us now."

His ears stood to attention at this information, seeming to understand what she was implying, grabbing his own tactical vest and fastening it against his bare chest.

"Well then darling, better show 'em around."

he stood cockily as he motioned to the relatively small expanse of sand bank in front of her. Ignoring his demeanour she walked slowly around their little island, being sure to look towards every object that could be recognisable.

"They should be here soon,"

she pondered, turning to Miles once more, both opting to stand in silence observing one another. His hands were rested on his belt loops as he leant his weight on one leg, she thought he looked striking against the jungle background, wind causing his braid to sway gently behind him. Thus, a sense of unease settled between them both, knowing that the things they truly wanted to do and say were being observed, and that this was possibly the last time they would be in avatar form caused her heart to ache.

"Real soon darling."

His words sounded almost melancholic, maybe she wasn't the only one thinking that way, at least it's what she hoped.

Eventually the sound of aircraft ahead was apparent and she and the Colonel were shipped off from your isolated paradise, back to the RDA base where they were both forced away from one another and bombarded with questions, tests, food, clothes, without so much as a goodbye.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"Soooooo, how was your trip with the colonel? I heard you two were stranded together for a whole night, you guys do the dirty yet?"

June's usual perkiness, which would ordinarily bring a playful fondness to Gaia's heart, seemed to grate against her ears like nails on a chalkboard.

"I don't want to talk about it,"

was all her hoarse voice could let out, tears brimming in her eyes as she turned her head away.

"Gaia?"

June sounded worried, pulling her friend's face in her hands to face her

"Oh my gosh, what happened, are you okay, is it the Colonel, did he do something?"

her register became higher with every word she spoke, as her eyes darted across her face nervously. Gaia couldn't help the tears that slipped down her face, a pathetic sight in the middle of the dining hall, nevertheless, June took her in her arms, cradling her. she never deserved her kindness.

"Come here, it's okay, don't cry,"

she shushed her as she battled to keep her feelings at bay. Eventually Gaia was released, feeling embarrassed and biting her lip, she tried to explain herself,

"I don't know why I'm crying,"

laughing halfheartedly.

"It's okay, you sure you don't wanna to talk about it?"

She enquired, head tilted as if she didn't quite know what to make of her emotions.

"No, it's okay, it's something I have to figure out myself I think..."

She concluded assuredly, hoping she would be able to keep to her own wishes.

"Alright, but if he hurts you, I won't hesitate to cut him,"

She lifted a butter knife in her hands, imitating how she would slice his skin making her giggle sincerely at last.

"You know what you need?"

June spoke suddenly, the knife previously in her hold clattering to the table.

"No, what's that June?"

she asked with curiosity.

"To get drunk!"

She declared passionately as if she were revealing the cure for cancer.

"I can agree with that"

Gaia laughed once more as they both made plans to go to the RDA bar later that night.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"Hey, June, what're you wearing?"

Gaia shouted from the drawer she was rifling through.

"I was gonna wear just a thong actually, I think that'll be enough to make Mike look my way,"

she laughed, posing in the mirror in nothing but the red lacy garment making her roommate cough out a laugh through the toothbrush held between her lips.

"June, be serious, you know that boy has been in love with you since he first laid eyes on you!"

"Really? You think?"

she sighed, flopping down on her bunk, twirling her hair in her fingers wistfully.

"Yes, are you blind? he stares at you like a lovesick puppy. I promise if you made even the slightest move he would go for it."

Gaia spoke with fervour, hoping to reassure her that he would be the lucky one if he ever had the chance, not the other way round.

"What about you, are you planning on seducing the Colonel? Oh, you know there's this rumor going round that you two fucked on that mission... "

she sighed, knowing exactly what she was referring to.

"Look, we didn't do anything it's just..."

she trailed off, a blush starting to form on her cheeks.

"Oh my gosh tell me!!"

she jumped up, leaning on her hands excitedly.

"Well when we were there it was so cold... and I may have been topless and he may have also been, and possibly cuddling me in my sleep.. only so we didn't get hypothermia and die. But I think the scientists saw my tits on the link."

She spoke shamefully, rubbing the back of her neck to quell her anxiety.

"Pahahah, so he totally copped a feel then, how ripped is he?"

At least she found it amusing, though Gaia were surprised that she didn't seem at all shocked with her news.

"No, he wouldn't do that, he's really respectful you know, I feel like he actually cares about me...but yes he's sooo ripped, I literally couldn't stop looking,"

she confessed wickedly, meeting her eye as they both laughed together like the old days.

"Okay, so you're definitely wearing this then, that'll get him looking for sure."

She pulled out a silky black dress that reminded Gaia of lingerie, with a back low enough to see her ass crack, making her eyes bulge out of her skull.

"Don't you think it'll be too much?"

She implored, wondering what kind of impression a dress like that could give, not that she was a prude.

"Absolutely not, this will be just enough,"

she smiled devilishly, pulling out her own, equally revealing outfit as they both continued to get ready to be stared at like a piece of meat at the RDA's very own bar.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

When she finally stepped into the bar, arms linked with June, she immediately felt eyes boring into her ass, not surprisingly, the dress was barely decent and she wondered why she were even doing this, knowing she didn't have to dress up to get Miles' attention. Although at the back of her mind she wondered if he was only attracted to her avatar body, maybe her puny human form couldn't suffice.

"Two vodka lime soda's pretty please"

June batted her lashes boldly at the bartender who quickly obliged, not before stealing a glance at her cleavage, Gaia noted amusedly.

"Wow, you really know how to work men up."

She mused, eyes wondering round the bar, saddened to find the Colonel wasn't anywhere to be seen amongst the congregation of other recombinant troops.

"You see mike anywhere?"

She asked, hoping they hadn't both got dressed up for nothing,

"yeah, he's right over there, is he looking?"

she asked, sipping her drink as if she hadn't noticed his presence.

"Oh yeah he's definitely looking alright,"

she choked down a laugh as she downed your drink, watching as mikes eyes raked up and down her body like he'd never seen a woman before.

"I swear if you don't go over there now he'll go feral."

She snorted, the liquid courage in her system agreeing with her plan, and giving her a quick hug before moving towards her target, leaving Gaia alone. She ordered drink after drink in boredom, sipping them as quickly as the first and before she knew it she was more than tipsy.

"Sunshine, what're you doing here alone?"

She heard a cheerful voice from behind her, turning to see Mansk, a few bruises littered his face, she presumed from the previous mission.

"Mansk!"

She hopped up gleefully, engulfing him in a hug that seemed to catch him off guard.

"Whoa there, are you drunk?"

his eyes crinkled at the sides as lips drew into a smile, holding her steady by the waist as she swayed.

"Absolutely not, you wanna dance?"

She smiled softly at him to which he complied, bringing her to the centre of the floor and twirling her in a circle before swaying slowly with his hands on her waist.

"I'm not sure the Colonel's gonna be too happy with this,"

he gulped, eyes shifting nervously between her and the door as if he was ready to run at any moment.

"What is he? my owner? I'm an adult I can do what I want,"

she smiled lazily, placing her head on his chest as they both continued to sway together to the sound of the music and chatter from the bar. She noticed the sound of heavy boots seemed to be drawing nearer but decided to ignore it, feeling comfortable in her current position; that was until she felt Mansk still, hands withdrawing from her hips at the speed of light.

"She's all yours boss,"

she heard him say with a slight tremble in his voice.

"I'm aware of that Mansk, you're all mine aren't you sunshine?"

Her stomach dropped, recognising his voice as she lifted her head to meet the eyes of the one and only Colonel Quaritch, his teeth bared whilst his tongue ran over the sharp fangs that were exposed as he eyed her slowly. Letting go of Mansk she stood awkwardly as though she'd been caught committing some sort of crime. Before she could protest, one hand placed on her naked back dragged her into his chest. She craned her head to meet his eyes, expecting to find fury and anger, instead she was met with a soft almost teasing look dancing on his features.

"Look at you sunshine, all dressed up like this, you trying to distract my whole team hm?"

He took the lead swaying her with more confidence than Mansk ever dared.

"No,"

she chuckled, the alcohol going to her head when she pressed a kiss between his pectoral muscles.

"It's for you Miles,"

she kissed up his chest between each word, standing on her toes attempting to reach his neck. God if that rumor wasn't true before she was certainly going to try to bring it to reality tonight. A groan rumbled through his chest and she watched his face contort in frustration.

"Shit, you're so drunk sweetheart."

His hand moved to the curve of her ass when he said this, eyes twinkling as he watched the mess she was making of herself, making him feel ever more powerful above her.

"Miles,"

she mewled into his broad chest, fingers reaching to wrap around his belt buckle, giving it a tug, causing their bodies to come crashing together.

"Okay sunshine, lets go,"

he said, voice bordering on panicked as he scooped her up and over his shoulder with zero effort, reasonably deciding to save her the further embarrassment she was about to cause herself, or possibly to save himself the difficulty of having to restrain himself when he looked down at her desperate posture and doe eyes, staring up at him so sweetly. Hand resting over her ass, he slapped lightly at her thigh when she tried to struggle off, walking out of the bar completely. She was at his mercy which made her wonder, with legs pressed tightly together, what he would do with this new found opportunity.

Taglist:

@ab-haya

@isabellekenway

@mechformers 

@jayedillon

[ghostwise]

Fic authors self rec! When you get this, reply with your favorite five fics that you've written, then pass on to at least five other writers. Spread the self-love 💗 (hi hello rinny spreading the love to your writing 💚)

Four little Crows, off to meet the Maker - "'Maker,' Tristeza thought that night, reading in her bedroom and finding herself unable to focus on the words. 'I know it is Your will, or it would not have come to pass! And yet, I am terrified. Forgive me. I know it is right to oppose the Crows but what is my little life, even in its greatest capacity, compared to the whole of them? Andraste, I beg of You: Protect us! Guide us! Keep us from harm!'"

This is the first chapter of my Antivan Zevwarden long-fic Matacuervos, and I am listing it as its own entry, though I'm proud of the entire work; I really feel the first chapter is some of my strongest writing to date. If you're at all curious at least peek at the first chapter... I'm so proud of it!

As for what's to come, I can promise: action, knife fights, romance, death, horses, worker's rights, gay nuns, haunted manors, prostitutes beating slavers to death, and more?

2. for suffering is such a part - "The Lady of the Forest stepped out from between the branches—only it wasn’t the Lady they knew. Close inspection revealed a new spirit entirely; her features changed, her form taller and more free, and branches of oak carried regally upon her head. She was only like an echo of the spirit they’d encountered in the temple, amplified and changed in tone.

'It is not so easy a thing to kill me,' the new Lady said with a smile. 'For you know well, the forest has as many faces as it does trees. Burn me down, cut me, bind me, the forest persists—as surely as autumn, as formless as mists.'"

For suffering is such a part was my first attempt at writing a long fic, and at 50k words it was my first truly ambitious writing project. I think it suffers issues in pacing and flow but I'll never stop being proud of it, it's a solid beginning. It also hosts some stuff I'm really hype about such as Jowan traveling with the Wardens, Zevran interacting with elven spirits, and Morrigan contracting lycanthropy. It's also the first appearance of OCs that show up in other works: Keeva, Mathuin, and Adelmar.

3. not a homecoming, but something like it - "The man Zevran is with has begun to pick up her groceries, although somewhat haphazardly, dropping one orange for every three he grabs. “You see?” he calls out, darting after a can and swiping it before it gets rolled over by a cart. “I knew she’d recognize you!”

And Zevran, the little boy she’d read stories to in the brothel, the same brown eyes, just taller, smiles at her like she’s singing a song and he’s in her lap again."

I think if you look at my writing a few things become really obvious: first of all, I love Zevran's story. Secondly, I'm big on community, friendship, culture, and healing trauma in that framework. No one is alone. No one is ever alone. Some of my favorite comments on this fic hit it right on the money:

4. Falon'Din enasal enaste - "Zevran wasn’t raised to feel grief, not the way others were. Grieving openly was a sign of weakness, and weakness invited abuse. Surviving was more important. But Hamal carries grief with him. He breathes it in his sleep. Braids it into his hair. How cruel and unfair it all is.

Tamlen is laid to rest among moss and stones, with flowers and so many ribbons."

I don't talk about this one very often!! It's very early-days writing. I remember being really proud of the tone and feeling in this. Grief is hard to write, but it's a topic I tackle often. But the scene of Tamlen's funeral is at the very core of Hamal's character, and the ZevHamal dynamic as a whole.

5. Drought Mermaids - "The work is complex. While Vida’s aptitude for weather magic is rare, and therefore in high demand, there’s more to it than summoning storms. She knows that the sky does not end with the horizon, that the atmosphere does not peter out into nothing in space. She knows that there are no clear boundaries; everything is part of everything else. There are a hundred factors to take into account."

I'd be remiss not to share a published piece of work. This story has existed for many years and it underwent several edits before it got picked up by a magazine. It's a sweet little tale about nostalgia, community, and magic please check it out !! I always recommend Haven Spec's features; they have some stellar work in their archives!

dividers by @saradika-graphics

[witchofthesouls]

any thoughts or concept ideas that you are cooking in you mind over Camiens?

the last one might have perked my interest. Some part of it ring similar tones that i had been working on on my down time (tho this was on an oc with a different craft that being a Blacksmith (Weapons maker kind) and the ever occuring difference between Cybertron and Caminus, despite looking the "same")

would some of the other think All Camiens are similar to the D.J.D or is does it just happen to that One indivdual that happens to be similar to that of the D.J.D?

Oh, I would love to see your interpretation of Camiens! Personally, I really fell in love with the idea that Camiens have deep cultural roots from Seekerkin societies and the War-Forged.

Early Camien society was far more militaristic and heavily focused on combat as the survivors of the Tribal wars and the First Cybertronian War went with the grieving Titan. Not only did Caminus bring his own citizens, but Megatronus' Darklanders, Liege Maximo's warrior-diplomats, and Crystal City skilled workers as well.

Those roots still exist in their language, dynamics, and even in their leadership roles. The Hammer of the Mistress of Flame is both ceremonial and practical as it invokes Solus Prime's Warhammer and the imagery of forge and forger as well as a weapon itself.

Unlike Cybertron, Camiens have far more social mobility and opportunities to jump into different careers. In fact, it's expected of citizens to have a variety of skills under their belt, including defense maneuvers.

At one point, all citizens were required to serve in the military and were rotated out. But millenia of relative peace loosened restrictions. Tradition and hostile fauna still demand Camiens to have some form of combat and weaponry training.

The establishment of the Torchbearers is a relatively new phenomenon as they are a dedicated six-member team of elite peacekeepers that travel across the planet. However, it's Healers and Cityspeakers that the population adore.

Camiens believe that each of them carries a fragment of Solus Herself, but the sparks that become Cityspeakers and Healers have more.

If Cityspeakers are Caminus' dream-speakers and His voice, then Healers are His direct touch.

Camien Healers are a cross between paladin, cleric, and a medic. Much how a forge creates tools of peace and war, Healers are very much both as they are able to manipulate and guide Caminus' own energy to others and within themselves to do incredibly impressive feats. Some are drawn to the denser population centers, remaining in hospitals and clinics to perform delicate operations in tandem with Caminus. Others are drawn to the dangerous edges of the dreaming, scattered Titan and the far-flung settlements of the planet, seeking out elements that cause great harm to the flow of Caminus' children.

This is a unique cultural and religious feature of Caminus as it blends faith healing, elite combatants, and medical training along with the constant war with the planet’s fauna and their own splinter groups as well as integrating newly activated War-Forged into the soul of their community.

Because the War-Forged have a monstrous capacity to deal and withstand damage as well as terrifying deep-core combat systems that are set to achieve directives no matter the cost, it is incredibly important to ensure that a newly awakened Healer pledges devotion to Caminus.

Hence, that is why Healers are easily identifiable by the intense fuschia optics and pink plating.

The process to become a Healer is a fiercely guarded secret of the pious Order of Luminara (a legendary figure that pledged loyalty and service directly to Caminus after Megatronus’ betrayal), but even promising candidates could ‘fail’ if Caminus refuses to impart a certain amount of His essence into the acolyte to awaken certain programs and coding. In the end, only a single handful are initiated into the Healer ranks every century or two.

Because of the intensity and strict regimen for potential Healers, many private groups keep a close eye on the individuals that fail to court them away from the Order as they can fulfill a multitude of highly skilled roles. While some do leave, many stay with the Order as they have ties to many organizations and fields and do receive preference.

Tourniquet is a notorious Healer for absolute dedication to hunting down extremists that deliberately target the far-flung settlements and hamlets. Much like how fire can have many names, the Way of Flame has many branches. However, there are branches that must be pruned away, such as the zealots of Sol's Lathe, who slaughter everyone and everything as a sacrifical tribute to bring back Solus to life as a reversal of Megatronus' sin ("From Death, springs Life."), and the strange cases of individuals under the throes of their version of Primus apotheosis -the delusion of being Solus' direct heir combined with paranoia and the rabid cannibalistic urge to devour sparks.

While Camiens do have a robust medical field, the presence of Healers are source of security to the population. Not only are they visible manifestations of Caminus and Solus, but should an invasion occur, they will be pulled from all operations with a new directive: slaughter.

The Nurse feels homesick because the D.J.D. reminds them of a heavily Order of Luminara-flavored Torchbearers.