#this post was prompted by me getting emotional when reading a fic and the author noted they were busy with their child

[rowanisawriter]

writer q&a

thanks for the tag @luvwich i love talking about myself lmao

tagging… @mashamorevvna @yourworsttotebag @swordbisexual no pressure

When did you start writing?

10 or 11 handwriting a three part series in notebooks lol i still remember the plot of my first book which was basically xmen AU. fic writing also started around that time

Are there different themes or genres you enjoy reading than what you write?

not really, my writing and my taste in reading usually align. even poetry which i read a lot of but don’t write, somehow still sneaks into my writing because i like making things read pretty

Is there a writer you want to emulate or get compared to often?

idk about fic but for published authors i like sally rooney and her character work, and i also love t. s. eliot’s rhythmic style in poetry, im always trying to emulate them

Can you tell me a bit about your writing space?

i have a toddler to the answer so this for now is my phone on the couch or in my bed in the middle of the night lmao. i’ve learned how to write under weird circumstances, but hopefully once she gives back some of the mental capacity she takes from me daily then i’ll sit at a table or something

What's your most effective way to muster up a muse?

can’t do it easily lol it comes to me in visions, usually after i read something or see a piece of art but if it’s not there it’s not there

Are there any recurring themes in your writing? Do they surprise you?

i write a lot about religion… no that’s not surprising…. i also write a lot about love… that’s not surprising either lol

What is your reason for writing?

i like stories a lot, and i like being praised, so writing stories and having people read them checks two boxes for me lol

Is there any specific comment or type of comment you find particularly motivating?

all comments are precious, but comments where people find something that i didn’t consciously put into a fic those are my favorite comments. i put a lot of myself into everything i write, sometimes i write things i don’t think about, when someone points it out it feels very personal (good)

How do you want to be thought about by your readers?

hope i don’t come across as insane, i want to be aloof and interesting but then people find me on tumblr and learn the truth

What do you feel is your greatest strength as a writer?

hopefully emotion, i focus a lot on that instead of setting or plot most of the time so if i get emotion right then that’s good, as long as i can make someone feel something then they’re compelled to continue reading (conversely when i am reading something and don’t feel any emotional connection to the thing then i put it down)

How do you feel about your own writing?

i like it very much, it’s the exact thing i want to read, and it was a very long road getting here to my true voice and style. i reread my own work constantly i really like it

When you write, are you influenced by what others might enjoy reading, or do you write purely for yourself, or a mix of both?

i can only write for myself, the motivation to write is only there if it’s something i want to write, even challenges and prompts i struggle with because there is some aspect of “this isn’t truly my idea” that i struggle with. i’ve written things that just aren’t popular (weird ship, quiet fandom, etc) but i wrote it anyway because i wanted to. obvs i want to be read otherwise i wouldn’t post online but i have a good audience now so usually no matter what i write it does get read anyway, so may as well just write what i want lol

[sylvies-kablooie]

having been a youth on the internet i have witnessed firsthand the scorn that gets tossed upon people above the age of 17 in fandom spaces. but have you considered that it's actually cool as hell that people from all sorts of walks of life enjoy something so much they want to post about it. that it is a microcosm of the human experience tied back to blorbo from your shows. that you love this sopping wet guy from a movie and it brings you into contact with people you never would have met otherwise.

i see people on here posting about their favorite fictional fellows and then i get occasional updates on their lives. they got a new pet. they work at a university. someone got married. someone wrote a book. someone baked a really tasty looking loaf of bread. i have mutuals in countries i will never set foot in and we talk to each other behind pixels on the screen. some person who is about to graduate high school hides behind a url like bizzare-eelcuddler and makes the most beautiful art you've ever seen of a show that was cancelled 6 years ago. is there not beauty in that, in the diversity of the human experience yet the way we can be unified?

[queers-gambit]

Opening Night and Open Hearts

prompt: opening night - a mother's fear, a locked walk-in freezer, confessions through a thick metal door, questioning what's deserved, and a proposal at The Bear after hours.

pairing: Carmen 'Carmy' Berzatto x female!reader

fandom masterlist: FX's The Bear

word count: 9.8k+

note: i think i give enough background for you guys to feel as if you don't need to read any other relating works, but i linked the fics that could be read as a small series (maybe?) also let author be lonely in peace

warnings: reader nicknamed Peach, established relationship, cursing, spoilers, fluff, angst, relationship angst, hurt and comfort, Carmy still (desperately) needs a nap, depiction of physical illness, boys are dumb and emotions are hard, reader-insert, depiction of toxic family, OC Carmy that grovels a lot, not edited!

⚠️ season two, episode ten spoilers

not necessary to read, but other relating works with Peach:

Dinner at the Homesick Restaurant

God's Plan part two: Two to Tango

Neon Sticky Notes

"Hi, yes, I can hear you - sorry about that, I was just making note of your reservation," you spoke smoothly into the phone, trying not to ogle your boyfriend wrapped in only a clean blue towel. "So, that's a party of four for Monsieur Claude Badeaux - all right, that's so lovely. I'm obligated to remind everyone that tonight's opening is a fine dining experience and the proper, corresponding dress code is being asked for. Are there any allergies I should make note of for your party?"

"Jean Paul has a tree nut allergy," you were told.

"All right, that's noted and highlighted: Jean Paul has a tree nut allergy. If there's anything else I could help you with?"

"Non," he chuckled. "I was surprised to see your invitation to this evening, though, mon cher. It's been so long, yes?"

"Well, it was my pleasure to extend the offer, we're ecstatic by your reservation," you chuckled. "We'll see you tonight, Monsieur, and should you need anything before then, you may call this number again."

You said your parting words in French, smiling at Carmy when you hung up and dropped your work phone. "Did I hear that correct?" Your lover asked with a broad grin, "Was that...?"

"Senior marketing advisor at The Washington Post?" You filled in for him. "Uh, yeah, I think it was, but you know me - I could be wrong."

"You invited someone from The Washington Post to the opening tonight?"

"Is that okay?" You asked, standing from the bed after making note in your datebook. "You look kinda - I don't know, shocked?"

"I-I am," he blinked at you, watching you gather his pristine clothing to hang on the closet door. "But in a good way - I can't believe you did this," he chuckled, wiping his mouth. "I mean - holy shit, Peaches."

You offered a toothy grin, "Figured I could pull a few of my own strings to help get the word out about your love-child."

This made Carmy snicker, "Hey, now. Tonight's important, don't make fun."

"I know," you nodded, leading him back into the bathroom to view your hair products. "Which is why I invited some important people and some not-so important people. I know this is serious, Carmy," you smiled at him, hoping to convey your support, "and I wanted to help in whatever way I could."

"You being there tonight is more than I could ask for," he chuckled, helping you onto the small bathroom counter. You squirted a bit of hair product in your hand, watching him flinch back a little, "Uh, I just don't want my hair greasy, Peach, you know? Not a good look and I'll sweat it out in the kitchen."

"I feel like I should be offended by you having no trust in me," you teased, insisting, "I know whatcha need, baby, lemme help."

Carmy smiled softly and held still, letting you run your hands through his curls to push everything back and away from his forehead in a stylish but manageable "do". There was a silent, serene moment as you and Carmy just existed together in a mundane space, his big, sad eyes watching your face as you worked. He wondered, "Think tonight's gonna be okay?"

"I think tonight's gonna be more than okay," you assured softly. "I think tonight's gonna go better than you're anticipating."

He sighed and planted his hands on either side of you, suddenly dropping his gaze. "I, uh... Sugar invited Mom t'tonight..."

"Yeah, I know."

"You know?"

"Sugar and I are still friends outside of us dating, Carmy," you smiled patiently, slowing your hands so you more toyed with his curls; pushing some strands behind his ears. "She needs someone as much as you do and I don't mind."

"But isn't that what Pete's for?"

"Yes, but you know, Pete's Pete."

Carmy snorted, "Yeah, yeah, good point."

"I don't know if she'll show up tonight, Bear, but whether she does or doesn't, it won't matter - you're not doing this for her. This is for you, Carmy, tonight's about The Bear opening - it's about you and this incredible, amazing thing you've done. Okay?" You caressed both his cheeks in your hands so he could only look at you directly. "If she shows, that's great," you whispered with a soft smile as your thumbs swept the apples of his cheeks, "and if she doesn't, it won't make tonight any less special. That, I can promise."

Carmy's forehead met yours, both pausing to breathe together; peace always a fleeting feeling as of late and being something you both capitalized on. You brought him in closer for an embrace, his face burying in your neck as your arms snaked around his to keep him as close as possible. His arms were tight around your waist, legs spread to accommodate him; both needing the feel of being close before that night's inevitable stressful event.

"Wow, well, don't you look all pretty! Wow, Peach," Pete greeted you when you scurried to the table with your friend in tow. "Oh, hi there!"

"Pete, this is my best friend, Danielle, and Dani, this is Pete, Sugar's husband."

"Hi, it's really nice to meet you," your friend greeted, the two instantly chattering as they both just blew past their introductions to instantly compliment one another's clothes. You smirked, knowing they'd get along famously, and looked around the brand new, packed restaurant.

"Hey, there she is, my pretty girl," Richie greeted smoothly, approaching your standing form to slide his hand around your shoulders.

"Hi, Cousin," you beamed, offering him a hug in greeting. "The place looks fantastic - it's so - I mean - just wow, Richie," you complimented. "You guys did such an amazing job. I need to tell Fak, too, this is - you guys should be so proud, it looks incredible. Hardly can believe what it was before this."

"It really is something, huh?" He grinned. "Hey, Pete," he nodded.

"Hey, Richie."

"And you must be the famous, the fabulous Miss Danielle?"

"That's me," your friend grinned. "You're Richie, right? Carmy's cousin who's not really a cousin but is as good as blood?"

"Yes, ma'am, the very same," he nodded with pride. "We've some drinks coming your way in just a moment, but I need to borrow Peach for just one second."

"Why do they call her Peach?" Dani asked, but Richie was leading you away as Pete was heard answering,

"Oh, because she mastered this peach cobbler with Carmy's mom, Donna, and she started the nickname..."

"What's wrong?" You asked softly with a smile as to not give the illusion to others that you were worried. "What can I do to help?"

"No, no, nothing too bad, you were just requested by the Frenchie-French guy."

"Oh, right, that's right, yeah, I can help with that," you sighed gently, smiling as you approached the table. Greeting the two men and women was easy, Richie impressed by your connections in the professional world. Tonight, The Washington Post didn't just dine with them - no, it was also the director of social media for three luxury, designer brands: Jean-Paul.

Yes, the man was so elusive that he just went by Jean-Paul. Fuck a last name!

Either way, it impressed Richie to hear the introductions. The two women were executives in their own companies, names Richie didn't catch because he was busy taking note of the way Mr. Frenchie-French was basically eye fucking you in front of them all.

"Well," Richie smiled stiffly, "tonight's incredibly special for us. In fact, uh, Y/N's boyfriend is the owner and head chef."

"Really?" Frenchie-French perked his brows, shifting his gaze over to you. "You always had a soft spots for chefs, non? For those who were versed in the culinary arts?"

"Well, mostly I appreciated a man in the kitchen simply because I burn water and would probably unintentionally starve myself," you teased easily, deflecting the man's subtle dig. "I'm actually here with family tonight, so, please, ladies and gentlemen, enjoy tonight - I know I'm biased when I say the food is exceptional, but I look forward to your own opinions."

"We will talk later, mon cher, I am sure there will be plenty to discuss," the Frenchman promised, kissing the back of your hand as you let Richie lead you away by your free hand.

You released a long sigh, muttering, "Bring them a bottle of real champagne, please, Richie, I had a few bottles imported just for them. Listen closely," you lowered your voice as you both paused on the side of the dining room, "bring them a bowl of thin sliced strawberries sprinkled in sugar and pop the cork at their table - it's impressive for whatever reason."

Richie pecked your temple and gave you a tight squeeze, "I got it all covered, girly. You all right? Look like you're gonna be sick?"

"Just men being men grosses me out, I guess," you sighed with a small shrug. "He's always had a thing for me, I figured I'd use that to get him here tonight - Carmy's work speaks for itself, but maybe he'd be inclined to publish an article or two for us if I play nice."

Richie paused you a few feet from your table, complimenting, "I hope Carmy knows he doesn't deserve you, Peach."

"You said years ago neither of us did," you smirked gently. "Said I wasn't relationship material, right? Remember?"

"I was wrong," he nodded. "I even said y'all would never be serious, but..." He scoffed to himself, "I've never seen that boy so crazy about anyone in his life. You've really changed him, Peach. I don't really know how to thank you."

"You can start by buttering up those flirty Frenchmen," you teased, giving his cheek a peck.

"On it," he winked, parting from your side.

Inside the kitchen some twenty minutes later, Richie approached Carmy, directing his attention, "Cousin?"

"Yo."

"Peach is on 17 with Pete."

"Okay."

"Go say hi."

"Yeah, eventually," Carmy nodded absently, never halting his work.

"Eventually?" Richie repeated with distain, something in his stomach twisting.

"Where the fuck is Josh!?" Carmy called into the kitchen, another chef echoing his concerns.

"Yo!" Richie barked as calmly as he could, "Just go say hi to your girl, Cousin."

"Yo, I'll go when I have a minute," Carmy deflected strongly. "I'm in the fuckin' shit, leave me the fuck alone."

"What? I'm saying - "

"I'll get there when I can get there!"

"I'm saying!"

"What?" Carmy barked.

"She's got important fucking people in that dining room, man," Richie scoffed, hands held up in defense. "Just for your ungrateful ass! Maybe the least you can do is go say fuckin' hi - even if you're fuckin' busy. She knows that, it'd be a nice gesture - or whatever fuckin' shit - I don't know! She's your girl!"

"Yeah! Exactly!" Carmy barked. "She's my fuckin' girl, she knows the fuckin' drill, I'll go say fuckin' hi when I get the fuckin' chance, Richie! Fuck's sake! Always tryna meddle and shit!"

"Jesus, fuck," Richie sighed, turning out of the kitchen with his hands waving Carmy off in defeat.

You were none the wiser, entertained by Pete and Dani's gabbing as Sugar was in-and-out, dealing with all the little things going wrong. These little things came to her in the form of notes left at the table subtly for her to go solve, you wanting to help but being shot down every time. Eventually, Carmy was approaching your table with a tray of food, shocking you slightly.

"Hey, Peach," He greeted softly, lowering the tray to balance on the table and lean over to kiss your cheek. "You look gorgeous, baby, wow," he complimented in a whisper, offering another quick kiss.

"Thank you, Chef," you smiled brightly, touching his forearm in a sign of affection. "What's all this you've got for us?"

He hummed and explained what he set on the table in front of you guys; eyes alight and cheeks flushed from the heat of the kitchen. He poured whatever sauce came with the main dish, smiling at Dani, nodding to Pete, then looking to you.

"I'll check on you later, all right, baby?" He mumbled, watching you nod. "I gotta get back," he whispered, "but thank you for being here, my pretty girl."

"No where else I'd rather be, Cream," you rushed, letting his lips find yours briefly.

"Stick around after, would you? When we close, just... Don't leave yet."

"Yes, Chef," you whispered against his lips with a grin. He gave one single more kiss before pulling away to stand upright.

"Enjoy," he bid the table before walking away.

"So, like," Dani trailed after making sure Carmy was out of earshot, "when's the wedding? 'Cause that might've been the cutest thing I've seen. I mean, opening night, he's cooking, but paused to come serve us? Serve you? And he's so soft with you, kissin' you, bein' all cute," she pouted dramatically. "I want a reason to wear a maid of honor dress, please."

"Hey, hey, chill on us. There's no wedding," you sighed with a small laugh, trying to play off how the subject made your stomach twist. "We haven't really talked about it, you know? No biggie."

"What?" She sputtered. "Wait, hang on. Y'all have been together - like - a stupid, ridiculous amount of time. The fuck you mean you haven't talked about it? What are y'all doing, just ignoring the elephant in the room?"

You shrugged lightly, "I don't know, we know if we ever got married, it'd be to each other, but that's really it. We know we want to be together, we know we want to marry each other, but there's been no serious conversation about it."

"Uh, does that sound right to you?" Dani asked Pete.

He shook his head as you all took dainty bites of food to savor the flavors (and save Sugar some). "When I knew with Natalie, I didn't hesitate."

"Well, Carmy isn't like you, Pete," you defended. "He's got a lot on his plate, too, you know?"

"You've said that since Mikey," Dani frowned, her voice quiet.

"With good reason, don't you think? Carmy's just - he's just going through a lot right now and it's a challenge, you know?"

"No, it's more like Carmy's got the emotional intelligence of a fucking teaspoon!"

"Hey," you snapped, "that's not his fault, he doesn't know much better, so watch your mouth."

"He does with you, like... He knows better when he's with you, when it comes to you, Peach," Pete offered softly. "Look, maybe Danielle has a point - it is a little weird. I mean, you guys have been together, what? Six, almost seven years? Creeping up on a decade of just dating - that's a long time. And didn't you guys do that weird little half-dating thing for two years before making it official? Don't you think that's enough time to know if you want to marry someone, and then, you know? Actually marry them? Or at least ask them?"

"Sure, maybe to other people, but Carmy and I have never been conventional, so, I don't see why we need to start now."

Danielle scoffed, "Look, God love Carmy and everything, but you're just wasting time now. He needs to either commit or let you find someone who can actually love you like you deserve."

"Oh, and Carmy doesn't?"

"Wasn't all that long ago that you two took a break 'cause he called you clingy - and some other unsavory terms," Danielle shrugged. "Doesn't really sound like someone who loves you unconditionally - the way you should be loved."

You sighed and sat back in your chair, "I appreciate the insight, but Carm and I are fine. Okay? We've got years under our belts, we don't want to fuck up what obviously works for us so chill out on the questions, okay? I don't have answers to them."

Danielle and Pete shared a look before the man got up to excuse himself to the restroom. You and Dani finished your meals before sipping your wine, waiting for Pete, but Dani sighed, "This lady's been staring in here for, like, ten minutes already. It's freezing, doesn't she want to come in?"

"Hmm? What're you - ?"

"This lady on the street," your friend pointed over her shoulder towards the window her back was now turned to.

When you peaked out, you gasped lightly when you saw Donna Berzatto smoking a cigarette. "Oh, shit!" You stood from your seat, rushing, "Okay, so, uh, yeah - just - can you just sit here for a second? I have to go handle that."

"Who is it?" Dani wondered earnestly.

"I got it, Peach," Pete told you, passing by the table swiftly with a hand patting your shoulder to keep you at your table.

"What the hell's happening?" Dani asked. "Who is that?"

"Nothing, no one, it's okay, I think that's someone we know, just, uh, hang on a second? We'll be right back."

"Sure," she nodded in confusion, watching you get from your seat and follow Pete out the door onto the blistering cold sidewalk.

"Hey, Mama Donna," you greeted happily, arms crossing over your chest to protect from the wind. "Have you been inside yet? We saved you a seat and all, but isn't this - just wow?" You grinned, trying to encourage her to say anything about her children's hard work.

"Oh, no, no, not you, too, Peach, why are you here?" She groaned lightly, looking upset and close to tears.

"I'm here 'cause of Carmy? I-It's opening night, yeah?" You offered in confusion. "Why? What's wrong, Mama D?" You worried, glancing at an emotional Pete.

"No, it's just, I can't come in, I can't, just no," she backed away, only now making you notice the way Pete cried. "I'm so sorry, Peach, honey, but I was never here. Okay? I-I'll call them later, I swear, I promise, I'll call them - but I-I-I wasn't here. Okay? You can't tell them I was here. I'm so sorry."

"Donna, don't do this," you begged, head shaking. "Don't, please. Just come in with Pete and I - just sit there for a bit. Just come in and see what your kids have done - Donna, it's so beautiful. You'd be so proud, but you should really see it for yourself - "

"I'm sorry, I'm so sorry, I can't, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, not tonight, no, I'm sorry, I can't," she deflected in a rambling mumble, turning and hustling down the sidewalk with her head shaking like a Etch-A-Sketch.

You rounded on Pete, "What the hell was that? Pete, what just happened?"

"Um, I-I don't - I didn't mean to."

"Pete? What didn't you mean?"

"She didn't tell her mom about the baby," he rushed, tears falling. "Nat didn't tell Donna, Peach, and I think I just did - I think I just fucked up and told her."

"Oh, no... No, Pete, you didn't."

"I didn't mean to! I swear it was an accident!"

"No, I know you didn't mean to, honey," you rushed, opening your arms to bring him in for a tight hug. "Oh, you poor boy, I'm sorry. I'm so sorry, Pete."

He sighed, "I'm sorry, too, Peach."

"For what?"

"That... We fell in love with Berzattos and this is our new normal now, right?" He sniffled.

You half-smiled, "Yeah, something like that. But it's okay. See, where Donna's afraid to give her love, neither of us are. Sugar and Carm deserve that from us, right? To be authentic and just love them?"

He nodded, "Yeah, you're right."

"And that's all we gotta do... Is love them, Pete."

"God knows where else they'd get it," he huffed, wiping his face. "Hey, um, I'll be in, in a second - I just need a minute alone, I think, in the cold."

"Take all the time you need," you agreed.

"We're not - we're not telling them about this, right?"

You sighed, "No, I don't think so - at least right now. It might hurt them more, you know? To know Donna was here, but never came in. That she ran away... Again. It'll hurt, they deserve to be happy about tonight."

Pete nodded rapidly, looking like he was gonna burst into tears. Instead of going back inside, you just moved to Pete's side and stood there; producing a cigarette, lighting it, offering Pete a drag that he turned down, and the both of you just standing silently; one smoking, one crying, both processing.

"Wow, look at these gorgeous ladies! By far the baddest in the whole place! Yeah, man!" Fak teased as he approached you and Danielle after closing the The Bear officially. "What a privilege to have you both dine with us this evening! Ugh, truly an honor to see you both here," he praised comically, evening giving a small bow that his brother mimicked.

Your eyes rolled, "You're laying it on really thick when I already tipped you." He snickered with Theo. "Hey, seriously, though, tonight was incredible. I mean, it was all so beautiful, you should all be so proud."

"Oh, we are," Neil giggled, his brother hanging off his shoulders.

"Good," you teased. "Uh, is now an okay time to go back and see him? Kinda wanna offer my compliments to the chef directly, you know?"

"No," Fak answered instantly, "uh, well, probably not the best time."

"Yeah, probably not," Theodore echoed.

"I can sense you two ramping up to something," you sighed, "so, I'm gonna ask you skip all that and tell me what's wrong. Why can't I go see my boyfriend? He just had an incredibly successful opening night, I kinda wanna kiss him if you don't mind."

"Um, well, h-he didn't want you to worry, so, he said not t'tell you, but, uh... Yeah, no, Carmy's, like, locked in the walk-in freezer. Han Solo style."

"What?"

"Locked in the walk-in," Fak nodded rapidly, "yeah, no, the handle - like, the whole handle came off. He's locked in, Peach..."

"Oh, my fucking God," you breathed. "Are you saying he - he missed opening night? Neil!"

"Yeah, kinda... Well, sorta - I mean, technically, but - "

"Oh, Jesus," you breezed past them all.

"Mmm-mmm, the fridge guy's name is Terry," Tina corrected Carmy, flinching a little when he slapped the other side of the metal door he was locked behind.

"See, th-tha-that's what I'm talking about!" Carmy raged. "I'm so fucking distracted, and for what? For fucking what? 'Cause of a girl?" He chuckled ruefully to himself.

"Nuh-uh, don't do that, Carmy," Tina scolded. "That's not no girl, that's your girl, that's Peach - you don't lash out at her, baby."

"Yo, maybe - maybe I'm just not built for this. Right? Maybe that's okay! Maybe that just is. She'd be better off, Tina... I'm just - I'm not built for this."

But what Carmy didn't hear was Sydney asking Tina to cover her at the front because she needed to step out the back, get some air; Tina accepting and telling Carm to hang on a moment. Something he missed. While Tina took Syd's spot, Syd rushed outside, and you slipped in the kitchen door; Carmy being surrounded by shitty ripped tape and an entire side full of the flowers he had brought in for tonight - for you. It was a haunting reminder; something suffocating.

When you got to the walk-in, you were prepared to call out for Carmy, but he started speaking from within, halting any word on your tongue.

"I wasn't here b-because I was looking a-a-at fucking engagement rings when the fridge guy fuckin' called," Carmy ranted, your heart stalling in your chest. "Right? Like, what the fuck was I thinking? Like I was gonna get married? Commit to this relationship? Be h-her fucking husband or some shit? Have a fucking wife? I'm a fucking - I'm a fuckin' psycho!" He laughed a little, the tears springing to your eyes as his words disarmed your heart and emotional dam. "That's why! That's why I'm good at what I do! That's how I operate! I am the best because I didn't have any of this fuckin' bullshit, right? I could - I could focus and I could concentrate and I had a routine and I - and I had fuckin' cell reception, and Peach and I just had our own routine! We didn't need this extra bullshit, and now..."

You just listened, leaning on the freezer's door, tears silently leaking down your cheeks as you had the horrendous realization that you were what now slowed Carmy down. You were what currently stood in his way, when this whole time, you thought you were helping; making things easier; supporting him. No... No, his words rattled your heart to accept that you were now the bane; the object of his ire. You and your relationship was what was wrong and was causing Carmy hurt and professional complications.

Something you never wanted to contribute towards. You both always said if this relationship got to be too hard, you'd walk away. Better to feel anger than resentment; and now, you knew you had to walk away else risk that resentment fester.

Carmy started up again, "I don't need to provide amusement or enjoyment, I don't need to be someone's 'to have and to hold'. I don't need to receive any amusement or enjoyment, nor for someone to have and hold me... And I'm completely fine with that. Because no amount of good is worth how terrible this fucking feels." You were ready to open your mouth, but he finished by nailing the final nail in the coffin of your relationship, "It's just a complete waste of fuckin' time - entertaining what I know I shouldn't. Being in this relationship, trying to give what I don't have, wasting everyone's time."

You took your chance, speaking through your tears, "I'm really sorry you feel that way, Carmen."

"Peach?" Carmy rasped from behind the door, sounding more alert than he had before. "Baby? Hey, hey, Peaches? That you? Peach - hey. Hey," he sounded desperate as you backed away from the door, a fist pounding into the metal, "hey, no, Y/N? Y/N!" The seriousness settled over you both, Carmen understanding you heard a lot more than ever intended and once those words are out there, there's no getting them back. "Y/N, baby? Hey, no, no, Y/N - listen to me - hey, no, no! I-I didn't know you were there, baby, okay? No, Y/N, please - tell me you're there now, let me explain." He paused. "Let me explain! Please! C'mon, baby, please, let me fucking explain - tell me you're still there! Y/N? Y/N!"

You sniffled and walked away, feeling smaller than you ever had in your life. You barely noticed when the kitchen door opened, not until a figured dressed in black stopped you. "Peach? Hey, hey," Richie halted you - taking note of the tears. "What's wrong? What happened? Are you okay - who fuckin' did it?"

You just stared at Richie for a long moment, opening your mouth twice before sighing and smiling sadly. "I never wanted to be what got in his way," you whispered sadly. "I'm sorry, Richie."

"Peaches, hey, what's - "

But you reached up to kiss his cheek, "Tonight was so beautiful, Cousin, and I'm so fucking proud of you all. Thank you for everything - not just tonight, Richie, but everything you do." You smiled again, whispering, "Take care of him. Okay? He'll need you."

"What're you talking about? What's going on? Where are you going? Hey, where are you going, Peach, please?"

"Have a good night, Richie, I love you," you whispered, leaving out the kitchen door as quickly as you could. "Hey," you sniffled, approaching Dani with the Fak Brothers, "can we go now, please?"

"Are you okay?" Dani worried in shock.

"I'd really like to go, Dani, please," you rushed, throwing your coat on and smiling at the Brothers as if your heart wasn't in pieces. "Thanks again for tonight, you guys, it was magical."

"Peach? Wait, hey, are you okay, baby? What just happened?" Neil worried, watching you snatch Dani's hand, but pause when screaming was heard from the kitchen. Everyone stared at the door, Neil muttering, "The fuck are they...?"

"Now, Dani, please," you whimpered to your friend, who wasted no time in escorting you out of The Bear. The moment you were outside, you burst into sobs, Dani grunting a little as she lead you down a side alley to lean you on a brick wall and beg you to breathe normally.

"What the hell just happened? Hey, honey, you need to breathe," she smoothed hair off your face - but it was like you were drowning in the air with the way you gasped and gaped and panted and whimpered and choked yourself.

"I-I-I-I think - I think w-we're done, I think we're done, I think - oh, fuck - I think we just broke up," you sobbed, hands on your knees. "Oh, my God, Dani," you whimpered, "I-I think - I think we're done, Danielle, oh, my fucking God. I-I heard things tonight that I just - I can't not know, anymore! He said - fuck! He was just so candid, he didn't know I was there so h-he was sayin' things I have t-to now confront - and I really didn't fucking want to! He just - he doesn't want to really marry me, D, and-and-and he was apparently looking a-a-a-at rings - fucking engagement rings! But then he said that w-was the issue - he missed the fridge guy's call 'cause he was looking at fucking rings for me and this is why he missed opening night - 'cause the fucking fridge broke! Oh, my God, Danielle, i-i-it's my fault, it's my fucking fault, he missed the most important night of his life and it's my fault - "

You were cut off by your stomach lurching, emptying your insides onto the pavement. The delicious appetizer, the tantalizing main course, Marcus' fresh baked bread that was delightfully soft on the inside yet baked crisp on the outside, and every bit of the sweetened dessert - all wasted on Chicago bricks.

"Okay, okay, ah, shit, just get it out, babe, there you go," Danielle held your hair, catching you in a suffocating hug once you were done puking. "I've got you, babe, I've got you. You're okay, no, hey, this isn't your fault. I've got you, come on. I think we need pints of ice cream and the saltiest pretzels we can find," she pushed some hair from your sticky forehead, pouting dramatically, "maybe some Pepto? Few Saltines and ginger ale? C'mon, we're going back to mine, there's a good girl," she coaxed you from the ground and away from the wall, "c'mon, you're stronger than this. There's my girl, here we go, just one foot in front of the other - together, with me, just like that."

You sobbed, not knowing that Sydney and her father stood listening just a few feet away behind a set of dumpsters.

The moment the freezer's door was open and Carmy was free, he was sprinting around the kitchen to grab his coat, leave Neil in charge of closing, and racing out the door as the Fak Brothers yelled at him for hurting your feelings.

"Hey, hey, hey, Chef! Carmy, wait!" Sydney chased him outside.

"No time!"

"Wait! She went with her friend!"

Carmy came to a tripping halt, catching himself before he hit the pavement before whirling around to approach her, "What?"

"Her friend? She was with some girl tonight?"

"Yeah - yeah, yeah, yeah, uh, um, that's - yeah, that's Danielle," Carmy nodded. "Her best friend, yeah, they were here tonight, sitting with Pete and Sugar."

"Listen, Carmy, I heard them when they left the restaurant... Peach was really upset, like, more upset than I've ever heard, saying you two broke up? Or something? She cried so hard, Carm, she actually threw up, it sounded like she was in genuine distress. I-I didn't know if I should've intervened, but her friend was with her and helping."

"Shit - fuck - Goddamnit," he seethed. "All right, thank you - "

"I doubt they went to your place, I think I heard her friend saying they were going to her apartment."

"Yeah, yeah, yeah, great, I know where Dani lives, thanks Syd!" Carmy bid, sprinting in the other direction - never bothering with the public bus system, just running into the night. Sydney was left to sigh on the sidewalk, Neil and Theo joining her before Richie followed - all watching Carmy disappear down the sidewalk.

"He's a fucking idiot," Richie shook his head.

"What the hell even happened?" Syd asked.

"Carmy mouthed off in the walk-in, Peach heard it all," Richie supplied. "You know the dumbass was gonna propose tonight?"

"What?" Syd blinked in shock.

"Yeah," Neil tacked on, "we had a whole plan and everything. Candles, soft music, flowers - there's a bunch of flower bouquets in the walk-in."

"I'm sure that was hard for Carm to look at," Syd sympathized.

"Doesn't excuse whatever he said," Richie snapped. "She looked devastated."

"She cried so hard, she threw up in the alley," Syd frowned.

"How do you know?" Neil asked.

"I heard her," the other chef frowned. "My dad and I - we actually both heard her."

"Jesus fuck," Richie seethed.

"I mean... Should we still set up?" Theo wondered to his brother. "What if they kiss and make up, like always? Carmy might still wanna go through with the proposal, right? You know?"

"Maybe," Neil trailed, looking at Richie.

"I don't fucking know," he sighed, hands on his hips.

"She thinks they broke up, I imagine whatever she heard was pretty nasty," Sydney frowned. "Think they'll really make up tonight?"

"Let's hope," Richie sighed. "That fuckin' idiot isn't gonna find anyone better than Peach. Fuck," he looked around the city street. "All right, fuck it, fine, let's fucking set up. Not like the jackass deserves it, but let's do it for Peach."

Neil and his brother grinned at each other, turning to hustle back into The Bear - leaving Sydney and Richie on the street. No words were exchanged, just silent shakes of their heads before they followed the Faks with the intention to help set up for a proposal nobody even knew if would still happen.

The cold night burned Carmy's lungs, but it was nothing compared to the feeling of suffocation he felt earlier when listening to one of your voicemails while trapped.

Your words were sweet as pie, as they usually were; a voicemail left when you were still at work, but feeling so excited to see him that night that you just had to call him. You reminded him of the adoration and love you held for him, relaying how proud you felt - and that you knew Mikey would be, too. You were always doing that, reassuring Carmy; and maybe that's why he felt so freaked out, he wasn't used to it. Even after almost 7 years together, he just wasn't used to what he didn't know he deserved.

Because Carmy didn't think he deserved anything remotely close to love, understanding, compassion, patience, and / or reassurance.

He had sobbed out loud as he locked his phone, not having the heart to delete your message. He often never did - he liked listening to your voice on long, hard nights; it brought him peace when the world felt too loud. He also kept whatever little notes you left for him, even going as far as to get a few of your hand-drawn hearts tattooed on his forearm. One for each anniversary you've shared together. He realized he never wanted to be without you and all his doubts and fear was him projecting his own incompetence towards this relationship; so, he locked his phone, he didn't delete your message.

The moment the fridge door had been opened, Carmy was out of there, shot off like a Roman Candle - your words of love and understanding still ringing in his ears as he was freed. He needed to apologize, and he needed to apologize right fucking now.

The whole run to Danielle's apartment, Carmy wasn't sure what to say to you; mulling over different ideas in his head. He tried to plan his speech, but the only thing he could think of was how much he loved you and that the ring in his pocket weighed a hundred pounds.

He pounded at Danielle's door. Carmy paced slightly as he waited, knocking frantically, and surely waking the neighbors - but that didn't matter. All that mattered was talking to you, something he was desperate to accomplish. When the door opened, your friend offered a stale look and shook her head, "Nope."

"Dani, please," he halted the closing door, "it's all a misunderstanding, I swear to God, please, just - let me try to fix this. Please, okay? I-I need her - I fucking need her and I have to fix this 'cause she's all that matters, okay? So, let me talk to her - please. Please, Danielle!"

"Yeah? The only thing?"

"More than anyone, more than anything - more than The fucking Bear, I swear to fucking God, Danielle! Just - Just one chance, please. I-I don't know how it all got so fucked, but please, I have to try - "

"Whatever you said in that freezer, Carmen, fucking gutted her, you hear me?" Dani stood in her doorway protectively. "Should've had your ass frozen for the hurt you caused her. How the fuck do you intend on making this right? Huh? It's been almost a fucking decade, dude, if you're seriously still afraid of commitment, just fuck off and leave her alone. Let her walk away 'cause I promise, there's a line of dudes who would love to put a ring on her loyal-ass finger - "

"Please, let me fix this," Carmy begged, sounding close to tears. "I need her, Danielle, please."

"It's okay, D," a voice whispered from behind Danielle, and when she turned, you were revealed - jacket and purse in hand, looking completely exhausted, drained, and disheveled. "I'm just tired, Dani, but we have to talk about this... So, I'll go home with him and call you tomorrow, okay?"

"You sure?"

"It's a decent walk, gives us too much time to talk," you shrugged, refusing to meet Carmy's bloodshot eyes. "Thanks for tonight, sorry I was such a mess," you whispered, hugging your best friend since pre-school.

"Girl, don't you ever apologize to me. But hey, look, I don't know, you were just drowning in your tears, like, five minutes ago. Sure you really wanna go? You can stay here as long as you'd like, girl, fuck him."

"Better to work it out now than later, I guess," you whispered, letting her kiss your cheek and see you guys out.

"She calls me cryin', Carmen, I'll kick your ass," She threatened as you moved down the apartment's hall. You might've snickered just a little, but the amusement was wiped clean when you rounded the corner and came up to the elevators.

Now that it was just you two, it was dreadfully awkward.

"Baby - "

"Just - don't talk for right now, Carmen," you sighed, shaking your head. "I'm still digesting all you said."

He frowned when you walked onto the elevator without a single emotion on your face, following you, and when on the ground floor, moved out to head home. It was quiet, it was awkward; only the sounds of traffic filling the space between you as you walked.

"Listen," he started with a long sigh, "you came in at the worst time, Peach, heard some shit you shouldn't have that I-I didn't even mean. I was just," he paused, sighing, "really angry and frustrated, fucking running my mouth 'cause I didn't know what else to do."

"Sounded like I came in at the best time since you're not very forthcoming with emotions. So, hearing your confession put a lot in perspective for me, Carm."

"I was just angry, Peach," he frowned, hands deep in his pockets. "Felt like I was self sabotaging myself, I wasn't sure what else to feel. So, I just lashed out. I didn't mean it, but I just felt like being angry... So fucking angry, baby, I just - I didn't know what else to feel."

"I don't know if I can be with someone like that," you whispered. "Someone who throws our relationship under the bus when he's angry, someone who's first line of defense is apparently to blame the relationship he's been in for over half a decade with the same girl. Someone you've known your whole life..."

"Peach - "

"If it's that easy for you to just disregard us, I don't think we should continue this."

Carmy took a breath and reached out to pull you to a stop. He dug in his pocket for a moment, then showed you the black velvet jewelry box. "I was gonna propose tonight, when everyone was gone," he explained when you took the box to open gingerly. "I think because that was on my mind already, something I was more than nervous to actually do, you're right, it did become my first line of defense to blame us - not just you, baby, but us. You and me... Mostly me, though," he chuckled sadly. "You're this perfect, sweet angel who just loves me out loud when I don't deserve it, and I'm... I'm just me," he sighed, eyes reddening. "And I know I'm never gonna be enough for you, I think I started to get in my head about if you said no. How I missed the call from Terry about the fridge 'cause I was picking out an engagement ring that you didn't even want, that you rejected - rejected me; and in turn, I missed opening night, and it all just - it got to a boiling point. Look, Peach, it's never been a secret that I don't think I deserve you... But I wanted to be the man that could at least give you an honest try of my best. You've stuck by me the past seven years when you should've ran for the hills, and I knew I wanted us for life years ago - but everything was still so up in the air. So confusing. So fucked up. I figured, after opening tonight, if things went t'plan, I could propose - prove to you that we're on our feet and there weren't any rugs to be pulled."

"What if things didn't go to plan?" You whispered.

"We're kinda living it now," he admitted, hand rubbing the back of his neck. "But even if tonight was all a total failure, I know I might've still done it because it's you, Peach. It's you... I've known for years you're who I want, I just never knew how to do this - to move us forward. You're my first relationship, hopefully my only relationship, and I just didn't know how to advance us. I think when things got real for me, my insecurities crept in, and I just reacted - I didn't think."

"We always said when this wasn't healthy or when this wasn't good for us anymore, we'd walk away," you reminded. "That we'd rather be sad or angry about a breakup instead of letting resentment fester from being together."

"It's still good for me, Peach, we're still good," he whispered, stepping closer. "Is it still good for you? Or did I lose you completely tonight?"

"I don't know, Carmy, you've been lashing out a lot lately. At me specifically."

"And with The Bear now open, I-I should be okay. You know? Back to normal?"

You chuckled dryly, "I see, back to your high walls? Emotional constipation?"

"Then maybe not normal," he corrected, "because I just needed to get us here, to tonight, to opening, and then show you that it's over. Show you that part of our lives is over and we only have more adventures to look forward to. Not ones like this, though," he gestured up the street, your eyes cutting over and realizing you were back at The Bear.

"Do you really think you're a psycho?"

He chuckled, "After tonight? Yeah, pretty convinced... Plus, I, uh, I saw in the freezer the way we're labeling things - and got angry about it. Angry about the way we were tearing tape and labeling things. It was so fucking stupid, but I just - I felt so crazy. I still do, I still feel like my head doesn't make sense and I'm a bit, you know... Crazy."

You nodded slowly, "Then how can you promise me this kinda shit won't happen again?"

"I don't think I can, but I can make you the promise that I am working on it; trying to identify when I feel reactive, trying to calm that down. I'm trying, Peach, I really am - it's just... Taking a lot of time," he sighed sadly. "And I know you don't have any more left to give me."

"I've already given you this many years," you reminded softly, "I think I could spare another or two if it meant you getting your shit together, that you get better, stop feeling so crazy."

"I don't deserve anymore time - "

"I think you need to step back and reevaluate what it means to be deserving because you always say that. That you don't deserve something - even as simple as time. Everyone deserves time and opportunity to figure shit out, Carmy, and you're no exception."

He nodded, "I'm... Trying." He took a long, deep breath, "I'm, uh... Going to meetings, you know, like, uh, Al-Anon and whatever."

"That's good, they're there to help," you nodded, stepping closer to take his hands in yours after closing the ring box and stuffing it back in his pocket. "Now, I think you need to do something."

"Anything, Peach."

"Take my hand, bring me back to The Bear, and go about your plan."

He froze in shock, blinking at you in earnest, "You really mean that?"

"Do I look like I'm joking?"

"No, ma'am, and I think that scares me more."

"You'd rather break up? 'Cause at this point, Carm, we either move forward with this engagement and fucking work our shit out, or we break up. It's been almost a decade. It's your choice, you're the one who was saying he couldn't be someone's husband, that he didn't need to provide anyone nor have them provide you with anything. So, you tell me what you want to do - because all I know is that I love you, I want you for life, but not if you're going to resent me and regret moving our relationship forward. I don't need to get married, Carmy, but you can't keep jerking me around like you have been. So... Make a decision based on what you want - based on what's best for you. Not what's best for us, but put yourself first right now, Carmy, and make a decision about what you want."

With a nod of his head, Carmy cleared his throat and offered you his hand. When he felt you lock your fingers with his, he glanced up and down the street, then lead you across it. Up the sidewalk and to the front door of The illuminating Bear, he paused to produce his keys and then lead you inside.

The lights were dim, but a flip of the switch brightly lit up the newly constructed restaurant. He seemed nervous at your cool demeanor, watching you shed your coat and set your purse down; but his hand took yours again and lead you further into the place. He seemed nervous, but once in the kitchen, it was almost like Carmy's stress melted away.

"I was... I had this plan," he explained softly, leaning on one of the work stations with both hands in yours to keep you in front of him. "I have all these candles, right? Was gonna distract you in here," he looked around the fluorescent lighting, "while Richie, Fak, Tina, and the others set everything up. We'd hang in here after the place was closed down, you know, show you around the completed kitchen. And really casually, I'd ask if you were ready to go, so, we'd go out the front, and we'd walk right into the candlelight..."

"Yeah?" He nodded, thumbs running over your hands as he pushed off the counter. "Don't deviate from your plan now..."

Carmy smirked, "Wanna hear the boring kitchen stuff?"

"Of course, I do."

So, he lead you around in a tour of the kitchen; showing off the new office space that he invited you to take advantage of whenever you wanted. The sleek appliances were shown off, the vast fridges, freezers, new cutlery, state-of-the-art dishwashers. Everything, he showed you, knowing you helped him pick a lot of it out - it was still nice to see it all come together finally.

And then, slowly, he lead you out of the kitchen, but to your honest shock, the dining room was covered in lit candles and different bouquets of thick, gorgeous floral arrangements. "Oh, holy shit," you breathed, Carmy hiding his confusion much better than you.

You came to a slow halt in the middle of the room, the lights out and only leaving the candles to provide an ambiance. "I had this whole speech planned, too," Carmy told you softly. "Remind you of the day we met, how you saved me from those jackass bullies - remember?"

You smiled softly, emotions swirling in your chest, "First day of first grade, you had a Buzz Lightyear backpack and some kids were picking on you 'cause of it."

"And what did you do?"

You felt bashful remembering, but humored him by answering, "Pushed their faces in the mud at recess and made them apologize."

"You've been my best friend since that day," he nodded, bringing you in a few steps closer. "And when we got to high school, my feelings changed. You weren't just my best friend, but the girl I was madly in love with... Took me a couple years to buck up the courage to ask you out officially, though."

"Sure took your sweet time," you whispered with a smile, "but all good things to those who wait, right?"

"And I think you've waited long enough for a man to be who you deserve," he frowned. "All these years - it's been you at my side. You even - fuck - you even came over to Amsterdam for a bit because I was feeling overwhelmed and lonely. Sad, maybe even a little homesick. But you just - you just showed up like it was the most common thing in the world."

You chuckled through your tears, "Yeah, we had some good times on that boat, didn't we?"

He nodded with a softening smile, pushing hair from your face and behind your ear; pausing to hold your cheek carefully. "And when we came back stateside... You were still the only constant presence in my life. You were my family without blood, and I knew after that Christmas that you'd forever be my other half, and I'd spend my life conveying how grateful I am for you. I just - I never knew how to put it into words until now."

"What changed?"

"Realizing that I wanted to marry you years ago - and I should've. I know I shouldn't have drug my feet with us, delay our inevitable, because honestly? I couldn't see my life without you in it and I knew I needed you with me forever. Peach," he frowned, reaching for your other cheek, "we agreed when this wasn't healthy, we'd walk away - I remember that. But I need you to know, I'll never fucking regret you. I'll never resent you. You've been unwaveringly supportive and loving and... And I've been the luckiest man to experience it all. But now," he pushed himself a step closer so he was hovered over your lips, "I know that you deserve someone just as present in this relationship as you are. I knew once The Bear was done, I was done - I was done beating this bush around and wasting time. I knew what I needed to do because the idea of you not being in my life anymore terrifies me more than anything. I don't remember life without you, Peach, and I don't ever want to know what it's like. So," he cleared his throat, "here, in the restaurant I so desperately wanted to give up on so many times, but you always stopped me, I wanted to make this official. I wanted it to be here to show you that the past year of our turmoil - it's fucking over, Peach. We did it," he whispered, "and now, the next and only thing I want to focus on is us."

Carmy readjusted you both for a little bit of space, holding your left hand tightly as he lowered himself to a single knee; looking up at you with those big, wide, sad blue eyes that were growing redder by the passing second. The candlelight created a romantic atmosphere that cocooned you both in a warm embrace, the flowers around you projecting their floral scent.

"So, I need to ask you something real important, baby," he whispered, his throat bobbing to restrain his emotion that clawed up his throat, "because if I don't, I don't think I could breathe again." He cleared his throat, pulling the ring box from his pocket and opening it to present to you officially. "Y/F/N Y/M/N Y/L/N... My sweetest Peach, I've loved you almost my entire life, you're my best friend, my most loyal and sweetest confidant. You make me want to be a man better than I was yesterday and never before have I ever seriously considered marriage - until you. Now? Now, I can't get the idea out of my head, so, my sweet girl," he took another breath, the tears in his eyes swelling and slowly dripping down his cheeks as you slowly got on your knees in front of him, "I need to ask you... W-Would you do me the honor? Of being my wife?"

"Carmen."

He grinned at you, both with tears down your cheeks. "Will you marry me, Y/N? I can't see my life without you in it, so... I want this, I want you for life. Y/N, will you marry me?" He paused, adding a meek little, "Please?" at the end.

With a deep breath, you slowly reached for his cheeks in a soft caress to wipe his tears; both just staring at one another for a good few moments before a face-splitting grin nearly cracked your lips. "Yes," you finally answered, "yeah, yes, yes, of course, I'll marry you, Carmen, yes!"

"Oh, thank fuckin' God," he laughed, letting you lunge forward to knock him backward in a hug - missing the candles arranged in a small circle for you two to stand in. Carmy laughed loudly, happily, giving you a tight squeeze as he mused, "Had my heart beatin' outta my chest for a second there, Peach."

"Oh, please," you laughed, "after all this time, you really thought I'd say no?"

He shrugged meekly, "Thought my most recent fuck-ups would've added to any reasons you might have to say no."

"Oh, spare me - you're my best friend, Carmy, you know I couldn't ever say no to you. Not without puking in nervousness."

"Can we maybe not talk about puke when we just got engaged?"

You laughed and nodded, "Fine, fine, fine, then put the ring on, please."

You presented your left manicured hand, watching Carmy almost giddily removed the band from the box, took a slow, deep breath, and then, the most beautiful ring was being slid onto your finger in an official show of your engagement. Of your undying love. Of your commitment, promises, and future together.

"YEAH!" An array of varying cheers and hollers of support and excitement rang out around you; startling both you and Carmy to look up. Richie, Sydney, Tina, Neil, Theo, Pete, and Sugar all hung in the bathroom's alcove - watching with splitting grins and cheering in celebration.

There was no time to question them as Richie lead the charge over; helping you to your feet for a giant, bear hug before gushing over your engagement ring. Neil and Theo popped one of the authentic bottles of champagne, pouring different flutes for those present.

"Calm down," Natalie scolded Richie lightly, "and move out the way, I want to hug my engaged bestie!"

You squealed with Sugar when her arms wrapped around you tightly, Rich moving on to congratulate Carmy - who apologized for his angry words earlier and thanked them for still setting things up. Richie promised it was for you, not Carmy, but still hugged the little shit with a laugh - indicating he was just joking.

"Let me see!" Natalie grinned, examining the ring Carmy chose and squealing again. "Oh, my God! Oh, it's so pretty! Oh, shit - sisters!" She gasped, holding your hands tightly, "We're going to be sisters - like, officially!"

"Sisters in law, but yeah, cupcake," you beamed at her, wiping your tears and giggling. "I can't - this just doesn't feel real," you told her softly, looking the few feet over to see Carmy with the lads as Sydney stood with you and Sugar. "Him proposing? I genuinely thought it wouldn't happen," you tried to laugh your nerves off, looking at your ring and fiddling with it.

"Yeah, right," Sydney laughed. "I haven't been around that long and even I knew this was gonna happen."

"Oh, please, she's right," Natalie grinned when you went to retaliate, "he first started talking about how he wanted to marry you when he was, like, 15. This has been the longest thing coming."

"Thank you guys for helping," you whispered with a smile. "It's all so beautiful."

"Happy to help for a good cause," Syd smiled, complimenting your ring as Neil called for a toast. Everyone was given flutes of champagne, Carmy's arm wrapping around your waist as each friend gave their own little speech, congratulating you both before the alcohol was being drained.

"Uh, and where are you two going?" Sugar asked about an hour later with a small giggle when Carmy wrapped an arm around your neck after helping you into your coat again.

"Gotta celebrate alone with my fiancé," he smirked, "later, guys! Don't forget to lock up!"

"Carmen!" You scolded with a small laugh, gaping at him.

"What? They got this," Carmy chuckled. "Thanks, you guys, see you tomorrow!"

"We can help clean," you told him as he lead you out of the restaurant.

"Nah, we've got bigger plans," he smirked at you. "Got plenty t'celebrate, yeah? Ever fucked as fiancés before?"

"No - but I hear it's some crazy sex," you whispered, locking your arms around his waist to stay close. Neither of you cared about the bus at this hour, opting to walk home in the cold - not that you felt it. Your love burned brighter than the cold biting your skin.

requesting rules and masterlist

The Bear masterlist

[rheas-chaos-motivation]

How to fight writer's block (45 ways)

If you are indecisive like me, use a 1-45 number generator and do that one

Listen to music that's the vibe of the scene you need to write.

Set small goals, like one sentence a day. Majority of the time that will make you want to write more

Get an accountability partner

Use writing sprints, write for 5 or 10 minutes without stopping. Then take a break and repeat.

STOP BEING SCARED TO WRITE BADLY

write something random, maybe just a paragraph to get in the flow

write while doing something else, like eating lunch or watching TV if you can focus

read a book you wouldn't normally read

do some physical activity

do writing games/writing prompts

imagine people making fanfiction about your work

watch a movie/show to inspire you

write the scene you've been wanting to write

do something else creative (doodle, paint, cook, etc)

edit a scene

rewrite a scene in a different setting

take a shower/bath or just wash your face

pick up a random book/remember a book you've read and "pick a fight" with the author. What did they do that you didn't like and why don't you?

listen to your favorite song (with lyrics) but imagine it in a different context. imagine it a scene from a show/a show.

make a list of things you want to include in your work, eventually you will come across an idea you will want to write.

use pen and paper

create a check list of things you have to do (make them small like open computer, open google docs, write one paragraph, etc.)

identify your strengths

identify your weaknesses

write from a different pov

remember why you started writing this project

remember why you started writing in general

dress up and pretend you are in a movie about a writer

reread your writing and find your favorite part

create a writing ritual, do two thing to get you in the mood of writing

take a break

write for one imaginary reader, what does that one reader want to see?

write some bad poetry (helps you "feel" your emotions)

use this game, you have to write an amount of words that you choose before the opponent knocks you out: Fighter's Block! (cerey.github.io)

write with a friend

write badly on purpose. And when i mean bad or cringe i mean commit. Write a dicord mod x discord kitten Wattpad fic (maybe dont post it though 😭). Just make yourself laugh

If you are stuck because you dont know what to do come up with something stupid that can be changed later (for this one scene the hero a has fourth leg that allows them to dig through the wall)

Figure out why you can't write and address that first.

imagine someone reading your story for the first time and it inspires them to do something they wouldn't have done otherwise (confess to their crush, start writing too, come out, etc)

GIVE YOURSELF DEADLINES AND STICK TO THEM

OR HAVE SOMEONE GIVE YOU DEADLINES

write about having writers block

write something that isn't yours (dont steal peoples work and try to publish it/pass it off as yours). Like a scene from a show or incorporate song lyrics into your scene.

create Pinterest boards based off your characters/plot/scenes

STOP BELEIVING IN WRITERS BLOCK AND WORK THOUGH IT. WRITE IT BADLY. WRITE IT BADLY. WRITE IT BADLY. WRITE WHEN YOU DONT FEEL LIKE IT. WRITE WHEN YOU THINK YOUR TERRIBLE. WRITE WHEN YOU ARE UPSET. WRITE IT BADLY.

[heyitsme1040]

Teddy Barnes [b.b]

summary : You make a bear resembling Bucky. You worry he’ll think having a bear based on your significant other will be weird, but Bucky’s delighted by your gesture. He wants to make a bear of you as well. 

pairings : Bucky Barnes x Reader

warnings : None (if I missed anything let me know!)

word count : 610

AO3 (x)

a/n : Day fifteen of Comfortember is here! The prompt was ‘plushies’. This was very self indulgent.

You felt silly walking into your apartment. The mall had been busy, but you were determined when you arrived. You’d been confident when you walked in, excited as you made the bear, and now you felt silly. You entered the apartment, calling out a quick greeting to let Bucky know you were home. You heard the shower running, so you curled up on the couch. You stared at the bear you’d made today. It was soft, and you couldn’t help smiling at it. 

“Hi doll,” Bucky kissed your head as he walked through the living room. “How was the mall?”

“It was good,” you hugged the bear closer, trying to hide it. 

“I’m glad. Did you find what you needed?”

“Yeah,” you sheepishly responded. 

You heard Bucky grab a glass, then the tap running as he filled his cup. You wondered how weird he would find the bear you made. The soft bear comforted you from where you were squeezing it in your arms. Bucky’s quiet footsteps reached you before he walked into your view. He sat on the couch facing you, smiling as he pulled your legs into his lap. 

“Hi,” his hand strokes your ankle. 

“Hi,” you smiled back at him. 

“What’d you get?”

“Oh! I just went to Build-A-Bear.”

Bucky’s brow furrowed as he tilted his head, “Build-A-Bear?”

“Yeah, it’s this store. You go in, and choose an unstuffed bear. Or other animals that they have there. Then you get it stuffed, choose the heart that goes in it, and you can add a sound. Once it’s stuffed, you choose clothes for it before making a birth certificate. You make a customized bear,” you shrug at your explanation. 

Bucky nodded at your explanation. “So, what did you make?”

Your cheeks flushed as his attention was now focused on the bear in your hold. With an internal cringe, you pulled the bear away from you. Holding it to face Bucky, you offer the bear to him. Bucky took the dark brown bear. Looked at the little black henley that was under the denim vest, noticed the way you’d tucked the boots into its dark jeans. 

“I made a mini you,” you explained. “This is Teddy Barnes. And if you squeeze his paw…” You reached out and pressed the plastic box in its paw. Bucky’s voice came through with an ‘I love you, doll’ that you had saved in your voice memos. “I know it’s probably kind of weird, but I just thought it’d be nice for when you’re on missions. Or if I just wanted a cuddle and you were busy.”

“This is really sweet,” Bucky lightly laughed. “It’s adorable.”

You quickly tugged Teddy Barnes out of Bucky’s hold, hugging it tight against you once again. “You don’t have to say that,” you snap. “I know it’s probably really weird. But–”

Bucky’s lips pressed to yours stops your rant before it could start. His hands cupped your head, holding you in place. You felt all defensive instinct drain out of you from the soft movement of the kiss. Bucky pulled back to breath, pressing his forehead against yours. 

“I was being serious,” he panted. “It’s the sweetest thing anyone has done. I love it. I love you,” Bucky pressed another kiss to your flushed skin. 

“I love you,” you whispered past the emotions building in your chest.

“And now I really want to make one of you, too. Can keep it in my duffle during missions. Have it on the bed with Teddy Barnes when we go places. Can’t have them getting lonely when we’re busy, now can we?”

You smiled widely, nodding at his question. “That sounds great,” you giggle. 

Author’s Note : Reblogs are appreciated, likes are welcome, and if you want to read more of my fics then maybe follow.

©heyitsme1040 If you find this post on any platform under a username different than heyitsme1040 it is not their work.

[blakbonnet]

AUTHOR OF THE WEEK: @darcylindbergh (@forpiratereasons)

Ever since the cancellation (and the second cancellation, thx max 🙃) I've found comfort in going back to fics that started it all for me - the OG fics that remind me of a happier time when the fandom was buzzing with activity, when it was all about meta and discussions and the love of the characters - and the first author I go back to to relive that is Darcy, without fail. I don't think you can read their work and be unaffected by it. Every single person I know has a favourite fic by them. Beyond lovely, lyrical prose, and brilliant plot - Darcy just gets them ✨ Read on to know a bit more about their writing process:

What's your writing process like? Do you start with the beginning or the end? Do you write in order or as the scenes come to you? 

Depends a little bit on how I came to the idea - was it an idea born from having a scene leap into my mind and now I’m just building the rest of the fic around it, or do I have a prompt, or do I have a goal I need to meet? So I start with whatever’s driving me to write the thing and I write the elevator pitch which is usually about 50 words of “what is this about.” Then I write a 500 word outline. Then I write a 1000 word outline. Then I start from the beginning and fill in to the end. I don’t usually write out of order, but I will if something really takes hold. 

Favourite trope or headcanon you like to explore while writing? 

Hurt/Comfort as a general trope. I like to write about finding the people who see you for who you are, the insecurity of disbelieving people could really love you, and the realization that it’s true, it’s really true: they do love you, not just as much as they say but so so so much more than they could put into words.

Whose voice is easier to write - Ed or Stede? Why? 

I think Ed is easier to write because his mind is very like mine (it’s definitely the untreated ADHD), but Stede is very fun to write because I think his sense of humor is quite like mine (it’s definitely the pretentious bitch /affectionate). They’re both so fantastically complex, I love being in both their heads. 

Your personal favourite thing you've written that you'd like more people to read 

Oh man this is a hard question. I will say I’m especially proud of “Bedtime Stories” which was a bit of an experiment and I’m so happy with how it turned out (@lindie-kninjaknitter did a great podfic too!) - and “Tenderly the Light” which I literally cried trying to write because I wanted it to work so bad and I trusted it so little, but with some distance I think it turned out really nice.

What is the one word that you think you use a lot? 

Not a word necessarily, but I like to write emotions as being felt in the inside of the elbows. I come back to that description a lot. 

Do you have a beta reader? Have they made you a better writer? 

I have a betaing cheerleader in @mintly who keeps me sane on the day to day. She reads about 75% of what I post in advance - the other 25% I’m just winging it really. Yeah, she’s absolutely made me a better writer, not just by helping me hone the story but by helping me trust myself too. 

Why OFMD 🥹

Gosh okay, the big question. For me OFMD is about - we spend a lot of our lives being put into little boxes ‘cause it’s tidy. It’s easy. And for a lot of our lives, we stick to our boxes because it’s easy for us too. We let it happen because there are expectations and we have responsibilities and obligations and these boxes keep us pinned in place, and it’s so easy to just stay where we’re put. 

But OFMD is about opening the lid to the box. It’s about seeing the light. It’s about how it’s never too late to open that lid. It’s about how if you just trust yourself enough and you trust the people around you, you can reach for a hand to lift you up and you can find one in the dark to help pull you out. You can find people, and you can find joy, and you can get out of that box and there’s so much room out there. And I know it’s hard. It’s so fucking hard. It’s okay if it’s hard. OFMD is about how it’s hard and scary and you will definitely fuck up and you will definitely have some scary moments wondering if you’re going to lose your balance and fall back in, but just hang on a little longer. Let that trust in yourself grow a little stronger. It’s better to stand unsteadily than to let yourself be made small again. 

And yeah, there will always be someone who wants to put you back in the box because it was easier for them, but you find your people and your joy and you hang on fucking tight and that’s stronger than easy. Our joy and our song and our communities and our hope will always be stronger than their commitment to easy. 

Rhys Darby’s legs don’t hurt either. 

Please head over to @ofmdlovelyletters (who also made the header) and send your love to all your favourite authors (and authors of the week 😈 watch that blog for some special letters coming your way)

[lcdrarry]

LCDrarry 2024 Round-Up Post | Week 1

On Sundays during our posting period, we won't post a new work, instead you have time to catch up with the works that posted during the week and hopefully leave lovely comments for our creators.

Happy reading, commenting and sharing! ;)

~Your LCDrarry Mods

PS: Please have a look at the author notes and tags on AO3 for additional information. Thank you!

PPS: Please share far and wide! Thank you!!

***

Podfic

***

A Mist That Appears (For a Little Time) by dodgerkedavra

Prompt: “Sweet November,” 2001, Pat O’Connor Written by: dodgerkedavra Narrated by: Anonymous Length: 02:25:58 Rating: Explicit Warnings: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Vomiting, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse

Summary: “Give me November, and I’ll teach you to be happy. There’s only one condition. You must swear on your magic that you won’t fall in love with me.” Harry’s so tired. His whole body hurts. If Malfoy can teach him how to be happy, then... “Okay.” Harry is working himself to death. Draco only has November to help him. Falling in love is strictly against the rules.

Listen to it now on AO3.

***

Art

***

[Art] A Game of Horcruxes

Prompt: "Game of Thrones", 2011, David Benioff Prompted by: Anonymous Author: Anonymous Art Medium: Digital Art Rating: Teen and Up Warnings: Duelling, Horcruxes, Blood and Injury

Summary: It has been centuries since an attack on the castle of a royal scion. Centuries, until now.

The Realm of Hogwarts is ruled by eight noble Slytherin families, aided by their Gryffindor armies. Each kingdom possesses a Horcrux—the most precious source of magic to the throne. But when the Kingdom of Malfoy finds their Horcrux stolen, Prince Draco must break all protocol and enlist the help of a commoner, Harry, to find what's missing. All the while, an evil beyond the horizon stirs, Dementor attacks are increasing, and civil unrest is burning across the land. Can Draco and Harry recover the Horcrux and save the realm? And will they be able to resist their growing attraction to each other in the meantime?

View it now on AO3.

***

Fic & Art

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[Fic & Art] A Game of Horcruxes

Prompt: "Game of Thrones", 2011, David Benioff Prompted by: Anonymous Author: Anonymous Word Count: 118,635 words Rating: Explicit Warnings: Brief Descriptions of Injury, Racism, Classism

Summary: It has been centuries since an attack on the castle of a royal scion. Centuries, until now.

The Realm of Hogwarts is ruled by eight noble Slytherin families, aided by their Gryffindor armies. Each kingdom possesses a Horcrux—the most precious source of magic to the throne. But when the Kingdom of Malfoy finds their Horcrux stolen, Prince Draco must break all protocol and enlist the help of a commoner, Harry, to find what's missing. All the while, an evil beyond the horizon stirs, Dementor attacks are increasing, and civil unrest is burning across the land. Can Draco and Harry recover the Horcrux and save the realm? And will they be able to resist their growing attraction to each other in the meantime?

Read it now on AO3.

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Fic

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surviving the mist

Prompt: "The Mist", 2017, TV Show Prompted by: Anonymous Author: Anonymous Word Count: 7,153 words Rating: Mature Warnings: one homophobic slur, Uncanny Valley, Blood, Trauma Bonding, mentions of past starvation, hinted at child abuse, Torture (off screen), Post-War, Minor pining, Clueless Harry Potter, Happy Ending, Sharing a Bed, involuntary housemates, Inspired by The Mist - Stephen King, LCDrarry 2024

Summary: Everything was perfect for Harry, until Draco moved into the cottage next door. He thought that Draco Malfoy being his neighbour was the worst that could happen to him. Until the outside world got turned into a death zone. Trapped by a mysterious fog, Harry and Draco have to try and get along while surviving the nightmares hiding outside, waiting, luring...

Read it now on AO3.

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If The Boxers Fit (A Cinderella Story)

Prompt: "100 Girls", 2000 Prompted by: @DrWhoIsGinnyHolmes (AO3 & Tumblr) Author: Anonymous Word Count: 8,360 words Rating: Explicit Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply

Summary: When Draco ends up shagging a hot, mysterious stranger in a broken Ministry lift and is left with nothing but a sexy pair of red boxers to remember them by, Draco’s friends go sleuthing.

Read it now on AO3.

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Listening to the Manor

Prompt: "Spirited Away", 2001, Hayao Miyazaki Prompted by: apricitydays (AO3) Author: Anonymous Word Count: 11,183 words Rating: Teen and up Warnings: No archive warnings apply

Summary: When Dudley gets turned into a bird on a roadtrip, Harry has to save his cousin. He meets a mysterious blond man and a sentient manor house that needs his help. But first he has to do his new job at the Magical Creature spa, the only reason he can stay...

Read it now on AO3.

***

Please help promote the fest by sharing your favourite submissions, so more people can enjoy all the amazing new Drarry works of LCDrarry. Thank you!

Creator reveals are on 15 June.

[hd-hurtcomfort-fest]

Something We Create 

Creator: anon Pairings: Harry Potter/Draco Malfoy Rating: E Word Count: 16.5K

Warnings/Tags: Friends to Lovers, Emotional Hurt/Comfort,  Fluff, Healing,  HEA, Found Family, Domestic Fluff, Slice of Life, Love Confessions, Getting Together, EWE, Post-Second Wizarding War with Voldemort (Harry Potter), POV Third-Person, Mental Health Issues, Brief Mention of Suicidal Ideation, Draco Malfoy Has Long Hair, Harry Potter Has Long Hair, Artist Harry Potter, Mind Healer Draco Malfoy, Mixed-Race Harry Potter, Bottom Draco Malfoy, Top Harry Potter, Established Ronald Weasley/Hermione Granger, Black Hermione Granger, Panic Attack, Healthy Coping Mechanisms, Anal Sex, Fingering, Rimming, Love Making, Praise Kink

Summary: Harry and Draco form a close friendship during their eighth year that lasts well beyond the walls of Hogwarts—it's clear to everyone that their feelings may not be as platonic as they seem to believe. Years after Hogwarts, Harry lives with Ron and Hermione in their London flat. When his best friends get engaged, and Harry goes to live with Draco in his farmhouse, how long will it take for them to realise what everyone else can already see? 

Author's Note (start):  People often say that this or that person has not yet found himself. But the self is not something one finds, it is something one creates. - Thomas Szasaz

Soundtrack: I Wanna Be Yours (Arctic Monkeys), Garden (Kamauu), Dandelions (Ruth B), Dusk Till Dawn (Zayn feat. Sia), Stand by You (Rachel Platten), Shake It Out (Florence + The Machine), Brave (Sara Bareilles), Unconditionally (Katy Perry). 

My incredible beta readers: (names to be shared at the author revelas at the fest). Thank you all so much for all the time and energy you put into helping me sculpt this fanfic into what it is. I appreciate your efforts endlessly. 

Thank you to the mods for running such an awesome HD Hurt/Comfort Fest. I really enjoyed writing for my fluffy prompt (details for which can be found in end notes). 

Enjoy! 

Author's Note (end):  Written for HD Hurt/Comfort Fest, 2024 . Prompt (#44): Everyone knows Harry and Draco are in love. Their friends and family know. Strangers on the street know. The only people who seem not to know are Harry and Draco, who think they're just a pair of unlikely best friends—could be h/c or full fluff. Props for funny simultaneous “oh” realisations without the fear of it ruining their friendship.

Thanks for reading!

***FIC PAIRING***

Fine-Fractured Halo Angst || E || 29k

*banner art by @basiatlu

[hardly-an-escape]

please note: my fics on AO3 are locked, so you will need an account to read them. if you need an invite please feel free to DM me! I also have a handful of non-Dreamling fics posted there :)

~the polished stuff~ [actual edited fics, posted to AO3]

what's in a name? (E, 9300 words) photographer Hob is on a road trip in California when he meets a mysterious stranger (Dream) in a diner | human AU, strangers to lovers

A Love Story (T, 23000 words) Hob is a voiceover actor, struggling to make ends meet; Morpheus is a literary novelist with a secret | Centennial Husbands Big Bang, human AU, getting together, rom com

Stormy Weather, or: Outside, the Wind (Inside, the Light) (T, 1600 words) Hob and Dream are having a movie night when the power goes out | first kiss, gratuitous use of archaic English

A Close Shave (G, 2150 words) retired and newly human, Dream needs a shave. Hob helps him and has a lot of feelings about it | gen, tooth-rotting fluff

would you go along with someone like me? (T, 1500 words) the 'omg they were roommates' college AU; Hob is a history major, Morpheus is studying poetry, and it's a very tiny dorm room | WIP, getting together, rating will go up

'cause every Dreamlord's crazy 'bout a sharp-dressed man (E, 4400 words) chapter two now up! | Dream enjoys Hob in formalwear at a fundraising gala, and Hob out of formalwear after the gala | established relationship, lovingly described tuxedo

it's warm, the skin I'm living in (E, 2400 words) the one with shapeshifting sex and emotional conversations about Dream's insecurities | established relationship, brief tentacle sex, Dream can have a vulva if he wants

Among the Stars We are Reborn (T, 5400 words) the one where Hob goes to space to look for a phoenix | sci fi, canon divergent, established relationship

First Time (E, 6000 words) after another bad breakup, Johanna encourages Morpheus to hook up with some dudes. Hob is only too happy to help with that | human AU, strangers to lovers

I'm stuck on you (I'm mighty glad you stayed) (M, 8700 words) Hob and Morpheus are stuck on an elevator | human AU, strangers to lovers

Headache (T, 3700 words) the one where Hob has a migraine and Dream ogles him in the bath | first kiss, getting together

Bleach (G, 1000 words) the one where Hob gets bleach on Dream's favorite sweater | established relationship, retired!Dream

it's the perfect time of year (E, 2500 words) spicy beach episode | established relationship

In the February Sun (T, 2600 words) Dream accidentally visits on Valentine's Day and has some feelings about being mistaken for a couple | first kiss, getting together

uneasy is the head that wears the crown (G, 1600 words) the one where Hob was secretly a prince on rumspringa when they met in 1389 | established relationship

let your heart be light (E, 2600 words) Hob and Dream spend Christmas morning together | established relationship, declarations of love

Kind of Blue, a kind of fire (E, 2900 words) the one where they drink whiskey and dance to Miles Davis in Hob's living room | first kiss, getting together

Fridays (T, 3000 words) Hob throughout history | gen, partly epistolary

~the rough stuff~ [little ficlets, extensive headcanons]

road trip prompts 2024 I was a passenger princess on a very long road trip and asked for prompts to amuse myself

all my Fluffbruary 2024 fills

AU idea: The Blue Castle by L.M. Montgomery

Hob and Dream meet ugly over a laundry argument (human AU)

Dreamling Bingo snippet: preview of would you go along with someone like me? chapter five

Dreamling Bingo snippet: excerpt from The Trenches Have Vanished Under the Plough (shellshocked WWI veterans AU)

at a Shakespeare in the Park performance, Hob misses Original Pronunciation

AU idea: Dream is a famous author with a secret career as a romance novelist and Hob is the voiceover actor who reads his audiobooks

assorted Smurch fills the coffeeshop AU hot and heavy in da club retired!Dream's birthday retired!Dream likes jewelry and piercings small follow-up to In the February Sun

what if Dream retired and he and Hob didn't immediately jump into bed and a relationship?

AU idea: Dream runs a famous haunted house and Hob is a famous wuss

AU idea: Roman Holiday (Dream is a prince and Hob is a handsome reporter)

the unabashedly, purposefully bad sex scene (click at your own risk. but make sure you read through all the additions in the notes.)

Rose takes a picture at a family picnic and Hob has a realization

Hob WILL fight Night and Time

acts of service as Hob's love language (which has art!)

please give me more sci fi in this fandom

~the I-guess-this-counts stuff~ [idk bro it's just random]

compilation of "and they lived happily ever after" (ie fairy tale endings) in different languages

how I would write a Jane Eyre AU if I ever wrote one, which I'm not going to do

what if Hob was actually in a relationship when Dream came back?

actually Hob should be a preschool/primary school teacher: part one, part two

actually Hob doesn't hate Shakespeare and I'm a little tired of that trope

and if you're looking for a real firehose, my writing tag contains pretty much all of the above, plus tag game replies, snippets from WIPs, and other little bits and bobs!

thanks for reading! I love you!

last updated 7/02/24

[literateowl]

Fic authors self rec! When you get this, reply with your favorite five fics that you've written, then pass on to at least five other writers! Spread the self-love 💞

I also received this from @bonheur-cafe and thank you both 💖

The plus side of only writing since January of this year is that I only have 4 fics posted and don't have to choose lol But I will still say why I love them and wanted to write them 😊

The no kissing rule: written because I like reading sickfics and want there to be more of them so when I saw the prompt "no kissing when someone has a fever" I decided that would be cute if medical professional TK enforced that but was also very clingy in every other way.

Come Home To Me: what else is Carlos up to in 2x02 before TK gets home. I loved writing the worried Carlos and the softness at the end. It was a challenge for me making sure his emotional state came across and I love that some of the lines I have in here are kind of a gut punch.

April Fools: Lizard related shenanigans. I just love the silliness between TK and Carlos in this one. This one spiraled from a Tumblr comment about TK having a photo of Lou 2. Proving to me that inspiration can strike anywhere.

The Adventures of Louis the Second: lizard shenanigans at the firehouse. I loved writing everyone together it's another fun and sweet one!

[forlorn-crows]

Do you have any mountain central fic recs? Literally anything works 🤍🤍

of course i do, dear anon. i am the CEO (self appointed) of the mountain fan club, after all. some are sfw, some not! so pls mind the tags/descriptions before reading <3

i'll start out with a rec of my own work; its not smut actually, just something short i wrote about him in his full creechur form: First and Fierce Affirming Sight. still remains one of my fav pieces ive written about him, if you can believe it. also, @yesandpeeps drew me the loveliest art to go with it, forever excited about that

(im sure half of my work is mountain at this point but he deserves it soooo)

now for the other ghesties!

There Is Beauty In The Way of Things by @ghostinthewires. Mountain's magic pulls him deep into the forest, where he doesn't have to keep such a tight hold over it. the moment mountain looks in the mirror and sees how he looks after days in the forest and calls himself beautiful? yeah, that's the good shit.

Permafrost by @miasmaghoul “Will you-” he whispers, feeling his skin prickle in the wake of Mountain’s barely-there touch, “will you help me now?” It’s pathetic and he knows it, but he’s beyond caring. Something dark flashes over Mountain’s face then, and Rain feels an anxious flutter in his chest.

“I believe I said I was having fun watching,” he rumbles, and Rain’s stomach plummets through the floor when he remembers what game they’re playing. i dont care how many times ive read it. its a delight. "i leave for 15 minutes and come back to find you ravishing yourself in my bed?" chefs kiss 10/10 line will never forget it

Summon The Divine by @askingforthesun Smooth-talking Mountain, Cumulus getting spoiled and worshipped to within an inch of her life, lazy sofa sex, nipples getting some much-needed attention, short-skirt-no-panties, my "Mountain cums quick when he's having a good pain day" agenda and just a hint of oral as a treat. what can i say, mal wrote this for me. so im gonna be obsessed with it lol. and its so...so THEMMM.

this ficlet also by @miasmaghoul Based on some ~feelings~ about the recent soundchecks of Twenties, I give you these two getting horny over each other's skills and fucking nasty in the practice room. ♡ again, this one was written for me. mountrain fucking nasty, what more could you want?

Make Him Feel This Pretty Burn by @crimsonclergy It’s been about a week since management shuffled employees around between locations. He’s grateful that he and Rain didn’t get split up. Having a familiar face in the shop is nice, especially now. Swiss had gotten assigned to a new location and was promptly replaced. Dew hates to admit it, but he misses him. Sure, he could be a pain in the ass sometimes but at least he was fun. coffee shop au. also written for my group prompt of mountaindew hatefuck, so if you're a lover of that, check out the link in my pinned post for more of those :3

Hiding From the Light by @feralghxuls Dew was Mountain's first kiss topside, and also ever. my emotions about this one are *slams fists on table* theMM

that's about all i can find for now. im sure i'll post this and think about some more i'll have to add later! please enjoy and give these authors lots of love <3

[ecivons]

Zosan/Sanzo Fic list

I just wanted to make a list of the fics I've read/Fic recommendations for anyone out there. The ones in bold purple are my absolute favorites. (A lot have M/E ratings and Adult language)

Falling by sorrowfulcheese - The dialogue.. the pacing.. THE CRUST I loved it all. One of the first zs fics haha, it's only tag is fluff. It barely feels like fluff fluff, this is just Zosans personal brand of fluff.

Liquid Courage by sabershadowkat (E) - Sanji experiences drunk Zoro once and keeps trying to sleep with him. (!! some dubious consent the first time). The last line is what got me.

[I saved a lot of shadowsaberkat works, just scroll through their entire account if you're okay with M+ fics]

Alongside All The Way by sabershadowkat (E) - I liked the Adventures going on in the background of the fic. Sort of a compilation of Zoro and Sanji becoming more and more important to eachother

Bit by Bit by sabershadowkat - Getting together type beat. A few moments of Zoro slowly dealing with his emotions for Sanji.

Falling Blossoms by sabershadowkat - I'm usually picky about established but I love the way they write <3. It's short and sweet. Just a lil Zosan date.

Things Unsaid (E) - Established Relationship. Zoro gets injured and they're forced to wait out a snow storm while working through their relationship. (I love this person's characterization of them wayy too much)

Rules of Love (E) - It’s one of those fics.. (conflict, sex, resolution) just the way I like my Zosan. A little internalized homophobia on Sanji's part.

when you say by bluewalk - Unrequited Usosan. Zosan from the perspective of a pining Usopp. (Beautiful, a bit confusing but I loved reading it)

tricks out of your sleeves by bluewalk - Zoro and Sanji are forced to learn a few things about each other's past. IMO it's written pretty gen. I love the character exploration.

Myalgia by Salmon_Pink - An exploration of how Zoro and Sanji talk about thriller bark (they don’t). They used the mood prompt so well the tension was welling up in my chest the entire time.

Understandable by Salmon_Pink (M) - Another short fic by Salmon Pink because they write the two of them amazingly. Zoro and Sanji who will never be emotionally vulnerable with each other out loud.

destructivity is a poison that runs through our veins by wasteofmind (M.. its E to me) - They want to kill each other.

Residue of a Rainbow by Narcissistic_Ninny (E) - Zoro and Sanji go through a traumatic experience and maybe fall in love too. This person has amazing fics, but this is definitely my favorite. Zoro is good at hiding what he's thinking but you just know..

green with envy blues by adietxt - Really short fic with jealous Zoro. I saved it mainly because the narration is a little funny.

it's a long way forward by donutsandcoffee - Sanji can't smile because of a devil fruit. The strawhats love his smile..

you got that something by adietxt - Sanji is forced to stick to Zoro. Nothing but a bundle of fluff and self-indulgence that I enjoyed all the same.

(failed) Stewardship by LibbyLune - Soulmate AU. Sanji's has been dead for a long time. Author has such an amazing take on soulmates I love it. I love Luffy's especially. P.S. The authors note at the end made me fall to my knees.

the universe told me by rudimentaryflair - Soulmate AU. Zoro desperately hides his soul mark while learning about his nakama's. I like how its almost the opposite of how Zoro and Sanji were portrayed in the previous fic I recommended (when it comes to their opinions on soulmates). I love both though.

blood, salt and idiocy by rosie_peverell - Zoro gets a taste of his own medicine. (Sanji gets injured trying to save him). It's short and cute.

and then the sun came out by demonzoro (shrinewreck) - Takes place in pre-ts, post-ts and future. Zosan realizing they're "friends". Extremely Tender idk what to tell you.

a catalog of non-definitive acts by demonzoro (shrinewreck) - Zoro pines. Nothing I say could possibly convey the emotions this fic makes me feel. You just need to give it a read I promise.

for poor and poorer still by rudimentaryflair - Modern AU. Short and sweet. Zoro finally finds the perfect moment to propose.

how normal people do by rudimentaryflair - Namivivi Pov. This is so funny. I love the best friend drinking buddy dynamic of Nami and Zoro. This fic has funny moments that I remember in public and start laughing to myself about.

paging mr. swordsman by rosie_peverell - If I had a nickel for every Modern AU Zosan ficlet that takes place in a grocery store..

The Fall of a Hundred Things by LibbyLune - Sanji sleeps with Zoro after a party one night and it messes him up. Franky is the MVP of this fic. I love him. (Check out author for more good works)

End On A High Note by thisislegit - Modern AU. Established Sanji and Zoro have problems they need to talk about. (Oh how I love the ups and downs of a mundanely domestic relationship)

In Your Warm Embrace by marimoliciousness - Sanji is an idiot and realizes something about Zoro (himself). They get caught in a snowstorm.

migratory animals by donutsandcoffee - Sanji is strong in a way that fascinates Zoro

that's all for now!! I might consider adding more in the future.

[scoganbingo]

How are we already almost finished with February of the new year? Time goes by entirely too fast these days, but that doesn't mean we've forgotten all about our Scogan Bingo posts. We had the Secret Santa (https://archiveofourown.org/collections/scoganbingoss23) that went off well, and we have had quite a few bingo square posts and not a recent Round-Up, so we're sliding that onto your dash right now. As this is our 'infant' bingo, so to speak, our Round 1 is still going strong, so if you considered signing up but haven't quite decided, check out our FAQ/Rules (https://scoganbingo.tumblr.com/post/728946030219018240/faqs-and-rules) and then go ahead and drop us a sign-up form with your name and likes and dislikes (https://href.li/?https://docs.google.com/forms/d/1N2jc2vhBD_yeMFRiKevPNlwe_9jpVh29jsao9nZGikk/viewform?edit_requested=true) so we can fix you right up with a card! Also we have a Discord (https://discord.gg/TE9GHUHy9D), so jump in and have fun with us. Meanwhile, come read some amazing fics!

Title: “Here, At The End of All Things” Author: Cerylid Card #: SBC 007 In hiding N4 Pairing: Scott/Logan (X-Men Comicverse) Rating: T Warnings/Tags: Touch-starved, Hurt/Comfort, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Angst, Resurrection, Suicidal Thoughts, Grief/Mourning, Scott Summers Needs A Hug, Trauma, Uncanny X-Men (2018) Wolverine and Cyclops, Alternative Universe - Slight Canon Divergence Summary: The other X-Men have vanished, and a newly-resurrected Scott has called out their enemies to face him at the remains of the School, determined to take as many of them with him as he can. He didn't expect Logan to show up and help. He didn't expect to survive. And he certainly didn't expect Logan to stay and look after him afterwards. Word Count: 3248 Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/50118301

Title: Sunday morning after Author: stormxpadme Square Filled: Hangover Pairing: Scott Summers/Logan Rating: T Summary: At a party at Stark Tower, Scott and Logan finally get drunk enough to spend the night together. Waking up the next morning is sobering in more than one regard. Word Count: 1950 Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/50857225

Title: On the way to the promised land Author: stormxpadme Square Filled: Our Song Pairing: Scott Summers/Logan Rating: T Summary: Back in the field after recovering from his ordeal at Orchis, Scott promptly runs into trouble right again. Luckily, Logan gets never tired of saving his ass. Word Count: 3686 Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/50883826

Title: Our love language dialect Author: stormxpadme Square Filled: Impulse Shopping Pairing: Scott Summers/Logan Rating: T Summary: Looking for a little gift for his and Logan's anniversary, Scott runs into unexpected trouble with bigots. Word Count: 4116 Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/50932843

Title: Basic instincts Author: stormxpadme Square Filled: Sharing Coded Love Words Pairing: Scott Summers/Logan Rating: T Summary: Sabretooth makes another attempt to win Logan for his cause, trying to turn him against Scott. It doesn't go as planned. Word Count: 3754 Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/51010015

Title: My eyes when I couldn't see Author: stormxpadme Square Filled: Neighbors AU Pairing: Scott Summers/Logan Rating: T Summary: Shortly after Scott has left Mutant High to live on his own and decide what he wants to do with his life, he learns about the Mutant Cure and makes a crucial decision about how to spend New Year's Eve. He doesn't expect a handsome stranger to get in the way of going through with it. Word Count: 6272 Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/51081472

Title: you mean more to me than you must know Author: George_Benji Square Filled/Prompt: i3 Dramatic Proposal Pairing: scott/logan Rating: T Tags/Warnings: established relationship, age difference, marriage proposal Summary: Scott and Logan have been dating for about a year. Scott's ready to take the next step. Word Count: 695 Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/51139258

Title: Gravitational force Author: stormxpadme Square Filled: Pick-Up Line Pairing: Scott Summers/Logan Rating: T Summary: When trying to save Logan and Marie from Sabretooth in Canada before Liberty Island, Scott and Ororo run into unexpected trouble, and Scott, badly injured, gets stuck in a death trap together with Logan. Luckily, Logan knows how to help. Word Count: 4100 Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/51153247

Title: you mean more to me than you must know Author: George_Benji Square Filled/Prompt: mutual pining/crush Pairing: scott/logan Rating: g Tags/Warnings: poetry, mutual pining Summary: A poem about Logan and Scott, and how much they love each other. Word Count: 119 Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/51206344

Title: My spirit's sleeping somewhere cold Author: stormxpadme Square Filled: FREE Halloween/Spooky-themed adoptable filled: Back from the dead Pairing: Scott Summers/Logan Rating: M Summary: When the Cure- and Dark Phoenix-crisis is over, Logan thinks he's lost everything. In the midst of his grief, Hank brings the stunning news that Logan might have a chance to get back the man he loves - if he's ready to go through to literal hell first. Word Count: 7,626 Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/51254512

Title: Blood like no other Artist: acidkoipond Square Filled/Prompt: vampires(adoptable replaced square) Pairing: Scott/Logan Rating: general Summary: N/A Word Count: N/A Link: https://www.tumblr.com/acidkoipond/732750737357094912/blood-like-no-other-prompt-vampires-entry-for

Title: I Have Doubts, Sometimes, Of Being Real Author: endlesstwanted Card #: SBC-011 Square Filled: B2 — Hogging the blankets Pairing: Logan/Scott Summers Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Warnings: Post-X2: X-Men United (2003), Past Jean Grey/Scott Summers, Implied/Referenced Character Death, Dreams and Nightmares Summary: Months after the events in Alkali Lake, Scott wakes up from a nightmare to find Logan at the usually empty side of the bed. Word Count: 878 Link:https://archiveofourown.org/works/51335404

Title: i'll remember you in the '88 ford Author: George_Benji Square Filled/Prompt: holidays Pairing: Scott/Logan Rating: g Tags/Warnings: Jewish Scott Summers, Domestic Fluff, Scott Summers Has Brain Damage Summary: Logan and Scott have moved out to a cabin in the woods together. They celebrate Hanukkah together. Word Count: 924 Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/52082611

Title: one of us is always leaving Author: George_Benji Square Filled/Prompt: O5 gifts Pairing: scott/logan Rating: g Tags/Warnings: break up, angst Summary: Scott gives Logan a watch to say goodbye. Perhaps actually saying goodbye would have been smarter. Word Count: 883 Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/52540438

Title: A Certain Understanding Author: Meddalarksen Square Filled/Prompt: I5 Headaches/Migraines Pairing: pre-relationship scott/logan Rating: g Tags/Warnings: migraine Summary: Word Count: 1748 Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/53212288

Title: Eden revives in the first kiss of love Author: Wolfsheart Square Filled/Prompt: G1 “I mean, I’d totally kiss you if you asked.” Pairing: Scott/Logan Rating: Teen Tags/Warnings: Fix-It, Time Travel Fix-It, Canon Divergence - Post-Movie: X-Men Days of Future Past (2014), Established Relationship, Established Logan/Scott Summers, Minor Remy LeBeau/Rogue, Minor Bobby Drake/Kitty Pryde, Gay Bobby Drake, Trans Kitty Pryde, Trans Male Character, Kissing, Making Out, Emma Frost Lives, Good Friend Emma Frost Summary: Logan wakes up in the present day, having time traveled to the future and past to stop Trask from creating the Sentinels that would wipe out the whole mutant population. When he opens his eyes, the world he knew is much, much different. Better but not at all what he expected. Word Count: 2742 Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/53491201

Title: Fifth Times the Charm Author: Cerylid Card: SBC-007 Square Filled/Prompt: (I4) - "Grand Romantic Gesture" Pairing: Scott/Logan Rating: G Tags/Warnings: Scott Summers Deserves Happiness, Scott is Scott, Logan is a Softie (X-Men) Summary: Scott Summers has been trying to ask Logan to the New Year party for a couple of weeks, but it keeps going wrong. When he finally gets the chance, can he overcome he fears to find out if Logan feels the same? Word Count: 2161 Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/53115751

Title: Long Nights Author: Cerylid Card: SBC-007 Square Filled/Prompt: (O5) - "Taking Care of Each Other" Pairing: Scott/Logan Rating: M Tags/Warnings: 5+1 Things, Missions, Only One Bed, Pool & Billiards, Grief/Mourning, Hurt Scott Summers, Scott Summers Deserves Happiness, Scott Summers Needs A Hug, Protective Logan (X-Men), Grumpy Logan (X-Men), Making Out, Intimacy Summary: Five long nights that Logan found difficult... and one long night he didn't. Word Count: 3791 Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/53116726

Title: New Beginnings Author: Cerylid Card: SBC-007 Square Filled/Prompt: (N5) - "Unwavering Friendship" Pairing: Scott/Logan Rating: G Tags/Warnings: N/A Summary: Mother Mold has been destroyed, and the whole of the new mutant nation of Krakoa has been celebrating. Everything has changed, everything is new, and maybe it’s the chance for new beginnings. Word Count: 1475 Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/53556145

Title: Sweetest temptation Author: stormxpadme Square Filled: Dessert Pairing: Scott Summers/Logan Rating: E Summary: On her first official mission with Logan for the X-Men, Marie ends up in captivity together with her team partner. Freeing them takes more out of Scott than expected. Some energy recharging is in order not only for him. Word Count: 4999 Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/50909293

Title: Today was a fairytale Author: stormxpadme Square Filled: Poppy (Red) - Pleasure Pairing: Scott Summers/Logan Rating: E Summary: On Valentine's Day, Scott finally wants to pop the big question to Jean. Things don't go as planned. Luckily, Logan is there to comfort him. Word Count: 6376 Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/50955793

Title: Coldness of space Author: stormxpadme Square Filled: Sharing Fantasies Pairing: Scott Summers/Logan Rating: E Summary: When Jean is resurrected by Phoenix and flees into space after a battle with the X-Men, Charles hires a person thought dead from Scott's life to take the X-Men to her. Scott is not thrilled. Word Count: 6194 Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/51001786

Title: Looking for something dumb to do Author: stormxpadme Square Filled: Honeymoon Pairing: Scott Summers/Logan Rating: E Summary: There's nothing romantic about Logan and Scott getting married. Or so they think. Word Count: 6880 Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/51033427

Title: Let's be bad guys Author: stormxpadme Square Filled: Bounty Hunters AU Pairing: Scott Summers/Logan Rating: E Summary: Logan and Scott are on a space journey to get to the nearest Shi’ar settlement for medical help. To finance the journey, they've taken to unusual methods which mean a life in constant danger. Word Count: 4274 Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/51056632

Title: Feel I'm in heaven Author: stormxpadme Square Filled: Oral Sex Pairing: Scott Summers/Logan Rating: E Summary: Logan isn't thrilled about Scott wanting to teach him how to fly the Blackbird. Scott has his own methods of convincing him. Word Count: 2562 Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/51106231

Title: Bathe me in sin Author: stormxpadme Square Filled: Sex In The Shower/Tub Pairing: Scott Summers/Logan Rating: E Summary: When a heist to get to some Weapon X secret goes wrong, Logan only just barely saves Scott from an explosion. Afterwards, some comfort cuddling is in order. Word Count: 3539 Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/51132289

Title: if you're looking down on me, i could really give a good goddamn Author: George_Benji Square Filled/Prompt: i2 First Kiss Pairing: scott/logan Rating: M Tags/Warnings: First Kiss, Fade to Black Summary: Scott's been kissed many times before, just never by Logan. Word Count: 683 Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/51159274

Title: Your taste on my tongue Author: stormxpadme Square Filled: Flavored Condoms Pairing: Scott Summers/Logan Rating: E Summary: As a new teenager at Mutant High unexpectedly turns out to be an enemy, Scott is left in a dangerous condition alone in the woods. Logan and Ororo get there just in time. Word Count: 4492 Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/51175732

Title: maybe love is a broken thing Author: George_Benji Square Filled/Prompt: i4, sex after a big fight Pairing: scott/logan Rating: e Tags/Warnings: porn without plot, anal sex, daddy kink Summary: The only thing Logan and Scott enjoy more than fighting is making up afterwards. Word Count: 1,882 Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/51182533

Title: What is written in your history Author: stormxpadme Square Filled: Dirty Talk Pairing: Scott Summers/Logan Rating: E Summary: Logan and Scott have been dealing with numerous attacks by Sabretooth lately, and Logan is increasingly anxious about Sabretooth's and his common past that he can't remember. An old friend from that past showing up brings surprisingly good news. Word Count: 7,520 Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/51202156

Title: Open my eyes for me Author: stormxpadme Square Filled: Image Prompt - red BDSM toys Pairing: Scott Summers/Logan Rating: E Summary: After an accident during sparring in the Danger Room, Logan has to fear for Scott's life. Thanks to Hank's help, the recovery turns out to be more thorough than anyone thought. Word Count: 7,808 Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/51229564

Title: Breaking The Rules Author: scottxlogan Card #: SBC-001 Square Filled: Scogan Bingo: I4: Worst Case Scenario Pairing: Scott Summers/James “Logan” Howlett Rating: Explicit Major Tags/Warnings/Triggers: Sexual Content, Awkward Sexual Situations, Forbidden, Breaking The Rules, Shower Sex, Locker Room, Lust Summary: With far too many changes taking place at Charles Xavier's school a new rule has been enforced upon the staff: No sex in the locker room. At any time. Not ever. So then why is by the books Scott Summers working his way past trouble in abandoning the rules with Logan in this steamy exchange where lust could prove to be the one thing that potentially causes Scott to shed his good boy image once and for all? Will temptation be the key to their undoing in more ways than one? Only time will tell! Word Count: 3979 Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/51534205

Title: im paranoid of things i cant avoid Author: George_Benji Square Filled/Prompt: 04 autumn festival Pairing: scott/logan Rating: E Tags/Warnings: plot what plot/porn without plot Summary: Logan and Scott go into a corn maze together. Logan gets them lost, and Scott almost has a meltdown. Word Count: 1,750 Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/51793231

Title: Mine! Author: Sivan325 Square Filled/Prompt: N3: Free Space Pairing: Logan/Scott Rating: Explicit Tags/Warnings: Dark Era comic, spoilers, temporary character death, telepath Scott Summers, Blind Scott Summers, omegaverse, alpha Logan, Omega Scott, possessive behavior/sex Summary: Logan dreamt of this moment. All he wants is that Scott will be happy. He loves him so much that it hurts. Now, seeing him like this, Logan wants to kill the mutant that made his omega hurts. Logan shredded Scott’s clothes, or at least what’s remain of, as he made sure that the omega is alright and unhurt. Word Count: 1630 Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/52732372

Artist: mercurysystem Square Filled/Prompt: 01 / lingerie Pairing: scott/logan Rating: mature Tags/Warnings: suggestive, lingerie Link: https://www.tumblr.com/mercurysystem/738986234538491904/for-my-scogan-bingo-prompt-lingerie-scoganbingo?source=share

Title: i'm pretty sure i'm the only guy he's hooked up with tonight Author: George_Benji Square Filled/Prompt: 03 / aphrodisiacs Pairing: scott/logan Rating: E Tags/Warnings: explicit sexual content, aphrodisiacs, recreational drug use Summary: Scott wanted to go camping. Bobby, Warren, Jean, Jubilee, and Logan tag along. But hey, at least Bobby brought some cool weed. He says it's from Krakoa, surely it won't do anything weird to mutants... right? Right? Word Count: 2,793 Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/52921804

Title: Resolution Author: Cerylid Card: SBC 007 Square Filled/Prompt: (G2) - "Snuggling" Pairing: Scott/Logan Rating: E Tags/Warnings: Scott Summers Needs A Hug, Logan is a Softie (X-Men), Sexual Content, telepathic trauma, Not Jean Grey Friendly Summary: After a bitter argument with his ex, Scott is rescued from his doubts by Logan. Word Count: 2474 Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/53440141

[emsuemsu]

@hprecfest day 31: fav among favs

Last day of 2023!! Last prompt of the magnificent HP rec fest!!! This fest has given me so much joy and introduced me to a bunch of new stories to read (which I probably would never even considered to read if it weren't for this fest) for the past month 🥹 December went by so fast, 2023 went by even faster. I’ve been in and out of the fandom for the last too many years, more out than in to be honest, but this year I crashlanded back to HP fanfiction which honestly is my safe haven even after all these years. Further ado, fav among favs which my silly little words will never do justice:

The Brightest Constellations of Our Souls by @thecouchsofa 🩵 256,402 words, draco/harry

Harry doesn’t know how to cope after the War. The only things that make him feel even remotely normal again are taking risks while flying and fighting with Malfoy. It’s not likely to end well. Or, Draco becomes obsessed with ‘Wonderwall’, reads Muggle books, and drives a campervan, while Harry slowly falls in love with Draco. A story about travelling around the British Isles in the late 90s while healing deep scars.

My life can be divided to before and after this fic. I like to think that I didn’t find this story but the other way around - this story found me. And since it is a new fic, posted in the course of last six months I truly do believe it was meant to be I'd come back to the fandom via this story.

This fic is really fucking precious to me and I'm like a healthy-ish amount of emotional about it. First of all it's incredibly well-written, the style of the whole story is very straight-forward but at the same time extremely detailed, immersive and beautiful, sentence after sentence. Even though I love longfics (and this is definitely a longfic with 250k) they can feel a bit dragged out at times, but the way this story is paced and organized I never had that feeling reading this. I felt like each and every word of this story was essential, nothing too much, nothing too little.

This story does come with a little cw from the author. This fic is heavy, really fucking heavy at times, but there is so much light and eventual happiness to balance it out. One of the reasons I love this story so much is that it feels so relatable, it's raw and real to me in so many ways. Harry is my ultimate favorite character out of all the fandoms and characters out there, and the Harry we get served in this fic is godsent. His gradual healing with Draco during their little travels is really moving and touching. Babes.

It's extremely slow burn. Like the burn is so slow the fire is completely out most of the story. But then there's these small things along the way; like Draco's wet left shoulder from the rain and getting almond croissants all the way from Edinburgh that feed the flame and just wreck the shit out of me. And this fic drags you through the mud and minefields right before (and/or during) getting to the part where something actually happens between them. The way their relationship builds along the story is magnificent and emotional. And when we finally get to part where the slow burn pays off and flames lick every inch of my rotten body this fic has some class A smut that I file in the category of "so good I cried". Although, I did manage to cry for nearly the entirety of this story.

This fic definitely is a journey, and it's a long, at times difficult and gut-wrenching, but in the end it's a journey I'm really fucking glad I took. This is a fic I think everyone should at least give a chance to, it'll steal your heart.

All in all, this is a very, very dear story to me on every level possible. Thank you so much @thecouchsofa for writing it, I'm beyond in love with this story and I'm so glad I happen to exist on this planet at the same time as you and your brilliant, beautiful stories 💕

[cailynwrites]

Harry Potter Rec Fest Day 2 - A comfort fic

This @hprecfest prompt was difficult for me because HP fanfic is all comfort fics for me. No matter how angsty, how dead dove, it's all comfort food. So I interpreted this prompt as fics that I go back to again and again.

EVERYTHING by GallaPlacidia Pairing: Draco x Harry

GallaPlacidia has such a way of writing, particularly for Draco's voice. She also has an economy of prose that makes just about every line elicit either a laugh or an emotional "ooof". She took down all her work when she published a beautiful book last year, but it's still available if you search around (I know there's a reddit post dedicated to it). I recommend starting with either "Dad Says" or "The Bucket List" but don't stop until you've devoured them all.

BONUS: She also recorded many of them for a podcast. Her versions have also been taken down, but she has said she has no objection to them being shared around and they're easy to find with a little googling. She's so good at narrating them that I was seriously bummed that she didn't record her novel as well. I definitely think her recordings heavily influenced my Draco voice.

Remain Nameless written by @heyjude19-writing and podficced by @beatificbean and @etl-echo-audiobooks Pairing: Draco x Hermione Word count: 312,286 Length: over 24 hours Rating: E

Two HeyJude recs in two days. Sorry not sorry! I don't know if Jude considers this a magnum opus, but it's massive and has incredible character study and development and really languishes in the enemies to lovers pipeline (in a good way!). It's angsty but not too angsty, which is why it qualifies as comfort for me. It's also translated into about 6 different languages, so if you're learning Italian on Duolingo, challenge yourself with a novel length Dramione.

The audiobook version narrated by @beatificbean is *chef's kiss*. It's also available to listen to on Spotify! It was my intro to the ETL-Echo universe and she is so good at Hermione and especially at reading really hot smut. If you've got a long road trip coming up, this is the perfect accompaniment. She has also recorded some outtakes and one-shots in the same universe: "Ceremonials" (AO3, Spotify).

************************************************************************

And finally, my two little self-recs ...

wasps and honey by @swoontodeath - a Podfic Pairing: Narcissa x Hermione Word count: 10,305 Length: 1:12:12 Rating: M

This was the first Cissmione I ever read. I recorded it for @hp-bodiceripper but it's got a great cottagecore vibe too. @swoontodeath's Narcissa is so lovely and complex and her internal monologue as she gets to know Hermione is wonderful. Also available on Spotify on the @etl-echo-audiobooks one-shot feed.

Sesame Seeds and the Entire Spectrum of Human Emotion by @ronbinary- a Podfic Pairing: Draco x Harry Word count: 9528 Length: 1:03:07 Rating: M

This was also recorded for a fest. @lcdrarry is so much fun; it's really fascinating to see the way the authors fit HP characters into other movie plots. @ronbinary wrote an adorable take on "The Proposal" for @lcdrarry 2021 and I recorded it for the 2023 fest. This perfect little romcom features fake dating, sharing a bed, adorable Molly Weasley meddling, and a lot of time on a boat. Also available on Spotify on the @etl-echo-audiobooks one-shot feed.

[sitp-recs]

HP Rec Fest, Day 18

Happy Monday with new recs for @hprecfest! Today I’ll go with two Drarry fics since I haven’t read any rare pair story that fits the prompt. I had so much fun revisiting these gems for this post, they both deliver my favourite combo of peak humor, sexy times and sweet romance. If you haven’t checked them out this is your pit stop to catch a break and go treat yourself!

Day 18) a fairy-tale inspired fic:

If the Cock Fits by tryslora (Drarry, E, 6k)

It��s like Cinderella, only Draco’s arse is the shoe left behind, and he’s searching for the perfect prick that fits.

tryslora is one of my favourite authors and I’m so happy that I get the chance to rec her stuff! this fic is so much fun, a mix of horny & sweet (my favorite flavor!); I love how it combines a few classic tropes like amnesia, one night stand and healing cock with the hilarious Cinderella twist which is perfectly executed. Draco’s obstinate to find the perfect cock - bless him - without realizing he’s already found the perfect guy 😌 his dynamics of friendship + oblivious mutual pining with Harry are so charming, and the side Ron/Pansy is a special treat for those who love this rare pair like I do. amazing comfort food with a sweet Harry and one of my favourite confession scenes!

The Sleeping Beauty Curse by who_la_hoop (Drarry, E, 152k)

When Draco Malfoy falls into a cursed sleep and can only be woken – at least, according to the Daily Prophet, that impeccable source of truth – by ‘true love’s kiss’, Harry Potter knows there’s no way on earth he’s the answer to this particular riddle. Is he . . .?

an absolute fandom classic by another brilliant author, this is such a surprising and satisfying ride! you might start off skeptical just reading the summary but believe me when I say who_la can actually pull anything off. their storytelling is phenomenal, vivid and gripping, the pacing is everything you want in a long fic and I just can’t praise the characterization enough. get ready to fall in love with Harry’s pov and to experience an intense emotional rollercoaster because this is both extremely fun and extremely touching. both characters are relatable and entertaining, their dynamics funny, sexy and soo romantic it made me warm and fuzzy with feels. I love that their love blooms in an authentic way (keep in mind this is a bonding fic!), and the chaotic bickering and smoking hot smut had me on the floor at multiple times. an epic must read!